#why can't this show just accept that they effed up the writing

[gossamerorigins]

Han Taeoh. You are too smart to waste your phone call on Hyewon. If you have one phone call, you call Kang Huiju. That girl would smash through the prison wall for you like the Kool-Aid Man.

[sugoi-and-spice]

Answering the other part of this Q from @hunajan in a separate post rather than a reblog because...

Well, you'll see why lol.

This is SUCH a great question!

So yeah, when I was expanding this fic, and realized that I wanted it to be a story with deeper meaning, rather than just a straight up fetish-y dubcon/noncon fic (which there's nothing wrong with, it's just not the direction I wanted this story to go), and when I decided that I did indeed want Shigaraki and MC to be endgame - I knew that there was A LOT of work that was going to need to happen in the story, and from Shigaraki's end, to make that possible.

As a quick disclaimer, in real life, I do not think Shigaraki and MC's relationship would be salvageable. Dear readers, if your relationship with a person starts with a freaking sexual assault or a place of this deep of manipulation - fucking run, don't walk lol.

Buuuut, this is fiction, and I love writing about effed up characters trying to make each other's lives a bit less effed up, so yeah, this is a romance that I intend to give a happy ending.

Of course, I still don't want to make a happy ending easy for them. I fucking love me a character arc, and Shigaraki in this fic has one hell of a character arc to go through, one of the biggest steps of which is taking accountability and doing some serious fucking atoning.

So to answer the question, no, Shigaraki's realization and apology wasn't particularly difficult to write or plan out, but it was something I was very careful with and definitely put a lot of thought into. And so my first step in crafting this plot point was to look at one of my favorite atonement arcs in media:

Endeavor's!

*nervously* Hahaha, I can hear the pitch forks sharpening already. A lot of people really hate this character and claim he has a shit redemption arc, but I couldn't disagree more tbh.

I think the most important aspect of atoning is accepting the fact that forgiveness must happen on the other person's terms - if it's granted at all. And if the person you've hurt doesn't ever forgive you, accepting that as well.

Endeavor's attempts for atonement are not perfect ones at first. He tries at first to mend his relationship with his kids, very much on his own terms:

This is not a flaw with the arc mind you, imo, but an intentional flaw of the character. The rocky beginning on his road to atonement.

Because ultimately, mending the relationship, earning forgiveness, building a new life with his family - those are all things that he wants. They are things that would serve him, would make him happy. But that's not necessarily what's actually best for his family.

What's best for his family, is to free them. Separate himself from them so that if they decide to forgive and move forward with them, they can do it on their terms.

^This right here is the scene that really brough My Hero Academia from good to great in my eyes. And made me realize how amazingly poignant Horikoshi was when it comes to telling stories about trauma and complicated family dynamics. It was such an amazing show of growth, maturity, and genuine care for his family, to want them all to just heal and be happy, even if that means he's not a part of it.

That's some damn good freaking atonement right there imo. And admittedly, it's probably due to some personal bias.

To be tmi for a sec, I have a lot of experience with abusive people, and abusive parents specifically. I am no contact with my father and very low contact with my mother. They are people who have done fucking terrible, awful things to me in my life and quite regularly, just expect me to forgive them without them putting any real work into changing things. They want me to forgive on their terms and their terms only, and they absolutely fucking expect forgiveness. Because that's what family does.

Bullshit.

I can't tell you how much in my life I've wanted to hear them say:

I think that is the pinnacle of an actual good apology honestly, and particularly when apologizing for doing truly horrendous things. It's to just reach out to people, say I'm sorry, you don't have to forgive me, but I am fucking sorry - I take full responsibility for your well-being and what I've put you through,. And then to work on making things better for others, and improving yourself going forward. No pushing, no love-bombing, no trying to make it up to them directly. To just lay it all out on the table and accept the consequences.

There's a reason that the 9th Step in AA is "making amends" and not "asking for forgiveness."

Sooooo, to bring it away from this Endeavor meta tangent, and back to your actual question - that's what I decided needed to be at the forefront of Shigraki's apology in Play Nice. Not the literal words "I'm sorry", but this part:

His willingness to walk away if that's what she wanted and was best for her, even if doing so made his own life noticeably worse. The promise to not cause her anymore of that pain, no matter what it takes - that's what really needed to happen here I think to make their relationship salvageable honestly. That's what I really wanted to highlight.

[banannabethchase]

Hello!! It’s me again. Would you write (even) more for the Fragile Invincibility au? I’d accept anything but specifically love to read the first time hangman takes the baller club boys to watch a match!! Thank you so much for every fic ✨

Backyard Wrasslin' - also on AO3

~

A "The Fragile Invincibility of Youth" story

Adam invites Matt, Kenny, and Nick to one of his wrestling shows. Mox is baffled.

~

Note: Teenagers are referenced having sex. They are both 18, committed relationship, nothing onscreen, all fade to black YA type vibes.

I...maybe have gone overboard on this prompt fill. I hope you enjoy!.

~

"You invited the Baller Club to a match?!" Mox asks. He's got his shirt off and belt undone. "And you decided to mention this right before we have sex?"

Adam, who's brain is decidedly not working right, nods. "Uh. Yeah?"

"They're gonna freak out," Mox says. "They're gonna think I'm actually trying to kill you."

"They won't - come back!" Adam grabs at Mox's belt loops. "I don't know why I brought it up. Take your pants off, I don't - come back."

Mox rolls his eyes. "Okay, yes, because I can't say no to you, but you'll explain yourself later."

"Explain myself la- what am I, your student?"

Mox grins at him. "I mean. We could play that."

"I'm going to kiss you so you shut up," Adam deadpans.

~

They're making their way into the kitchen when Mox grabs Adam's arm and pushes him against the wall. "Wait a second."

"Again?!" Adam giggles. "My parents are going to be home in, like, five minutes."

"Your hair's all messed up," Mox says, fiddling with Adam's hair.

Adam slaps his fingers away. "I - let me fix it. Get off."

"Already did that!"

Adam laughs as he steps into the bathroom. He ties his hair back in a quick bun, adjusts his shirt, and steps back out. "So - "

"So you invited your ex and your annoying friends to our match tonight," Mox says. He doesn't look angry, at least, so Adam thinks that's a small win.

"I can tell them no if you don't want them there," Adam says. He drops onto the couch, pulling his backpack toward him with his foot. He briefly worries Mox won't join him, but then he's there, snuggled up next to Adam like a puppy. “Seriously.”

“No, I just want to make sure they know I’m not actually hurting you.” He looks up at Adam, frowning. “As much as I’m glad you’re all friends again, I’m still a little worried they’re looking for an excuse to kill me.”

“They won’t kill you,” Adam says, running his fingers through Mox’s hair. He’d grown it out over the winter, bringing back the soft locks Adam had originally fallen in love with. The blue was new, though. He and Willow match now. “And if they do, I’ll kill them back so I can use their blood to resurrect you.”

“I need you to stop watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” Mox laughs, but he curls into Adam’s lap and falls asleep while Adam completes his Chemistry homework.

~

“Okay, I know I haven’t called you in, like, years, but I have no idea where to go, and I think I’m being followed by a white van, and I’m pretty sure I’m about to kill Nick and Kenny, so where the hell am I supposed to go?!”

Adam pulls the phone away from his face as Matt rants. “Um,” he says. “Are you – where are you?!”

“I don’t know!” Matt wails. “There’s a blue house with, like, pride flags everywhere?”

“Okay, you’re close!” Adam jogs past the ring and parking lot, then dashes out to the road. “Do you see me?” He waves his free hand. “I’m waving. Do you see me?”

Making what is probably a highly illegal u-turn in the middle of the road, a car that is highly familiar zooms toward him and slows only to turn into the dirt road. Matt, looking haggard and confused, is behind the wheel.

“When I tell you these two can’t even read an effing GPS, I’m not kidding.” Matt exhales, blowing his hair out of his eyes. “Where do I go next?”

“Follow me.”

Adam jogs as Matt follows him, and guides Matt into a parking space he’s pretty sure Matt won’t be able to back out of on his own. He waits a little awkwardly as Matt picks his way around the puddles of mud.

“This place is a mess,” he says, grabbing Adam’s arm as he leaps over a puddle.

Adam shrugs as Kenny and Nick, a little less delicately, make their way around the puddles and follow Adam toward the ring and chairs. “It’s a backyard wrestling group. Nothing’s particularly well made here.” He gestures to the seats he saved for the three of them. “Except for the matches. Those are pretty cool.”

Matt primly sits into a chair. “When do you go on?”

“Well, me and Mox have a match first,” Adam says, “but you’ll get to see some cool stuff, too. Eddie is in the main event, so he’ll be on last. He’s going up against the Bryan guy Mox wrestled a while back.”

“Are there any other matches?” Nick asks. He’s looking around eagerly, like he’s more comfortable here than he expected.

Adam nods. “I think three others? Willow’s going up against Ruby – they’re doing a feud because Ruby hit her with a chair a while back – and I think this kid Wheeler Yuta is going up against somebody. He’s a sophomore.”

Matt’s eyes widen. “He’s here? Really?”

Adam states at Matt. “Oh, god.”

“I –”

“I can’t believe you have a crush on him,” Nick chuckles.

“I don’t!” Matt says. Adam, Nick, and Kenny stare at him. Adam thinks it’ll be seconds to wait him out. “…I do. Don’t tell him.”

Adam grins. “I won’t.” He bumps Matt’s shoulder with his. “I gotta go get ready for my match, though, so I’ll see you later.” Adam looks at Kenny. At Nick. At Matt. “Um. Thanks for coming, guys. It means a lot.”

“Of course, Adam,” Kenny says. His smile is genuine when he looks at Adam, and it doesn’t ache like it used to. It’s nice. But nothing more. “Go out there and kill it.”

Adam smiles back. “I will.” He makes his way to the tent where the other wrestlers are getting ready. Ruby is doing Willow’s hair as Willow plays some song game on her phone. Eddie and Mox are trading headlocks in the corner. Wheeler Yuta is stretching on his own, though, so Adam walks over to him.

“Hey, dude,” he says, settling in the chair by Yuta’s bag. “How are you holding up?

“Good,” Yuta says, smile a little weak. “Nervous. Claudio’s huge. I’m pretty sure he’s going to kill me.”

“He won’t kill you,” Adam says, waving it off. “He’s good. And he’s safe.” Adam doesn’t mention the time he almost broke his arm last week after taking an elbow drop wrong, since that was more his fault. “You’ll do great.”

“That’s not how Eddie sees it,” Yuta says, chancing a glance over at Eddie, who is now sitting on Mox’s butt and poking him in the ribs to make him laugh. “He really hates Claudio.”

Adam knows Eddie’s disdain for Claudio, knows of the hatred, but doesn’t know why. He doesn’t feel like he’s ready to ask about it, though. “Eddie hates a lot of things,” he decides on. “Doesn’t make them bad.”

Yuta nods slowly. “Yeah.” They’re quiet for a moment, and Adam’s about to leave when Yuta says, “Um, actually, I have a question.” When he looks up, his cheeks are just this side of pink. “Mox told me you were, um, inviting the Jacksons?”

Adam hesitates. “Yeah?”

“Is, um,” Yuta folds himself into a weird shape. Adam assumes it’s a stretch, but he’s upside down and standing on his head, so he’s not sure. “Is Matt going to be here?”

“Oh, god.”

“No!” Yuta says, scrambling to his feet. “It’s – okay, don’t say anything.”

“I promise,” Adam deadpans, “if you go out there and wrestle like you’ve been, Matt will fall in love with you before you know it.”

Yuta lights up. “Really?”

Adam sighs. “Yes.”

He shoves Eddie off of Mox, getting a smack on the ass for his troubles and grinning about it. “Come on,” he says, dragging Mox to the back. “Let’s go over the match, one more time.”

They run the match, throwing each other around, and it ends with Mox pinning Adam. It doesn’t quite feel like Adam’s the one losing, though, with the way Mox’s legs straddle Adam’s hips and his arms loop around Adam’s legs. Mox called it a rollup. Adam asked him if it was secretly a new position Mox wanted to try.

“Oh, god, go be pervs somewhere else,” Ruby says, nudging Mox’s leg with her boot. “Tony wanted me to get you two idiots up so you can get to the stage.”

Mox swings his leg over, spins to his feet, and sticks out his arm. “C’mon, baby, let’s get out there so I can kick your ass.”

“You don’t have to be so annoying about it,” Adam giggles as he leaps to his feet. “I’ve won in other –”

“Nope!” Ruby yells. “Still in earshot! Shut up!”

They get behind the curtain ready for the ring, and Mox starts bouncing. Since Adam’s the newbie, he goes out first to his edit of Bronco, throwing the curtain open at the first, ‘Bronco, runnin’ wild,’ to cheers. He glances over to see Matt, Nick, and Kenny cheering like they’ve been here a million times, like they know exactly what to do. He’s excited to be the face in this match – it’s the first time he’s gotten a real character for himself. The jeans and old cowboy boots work almost too well.

“And coming in next,” comes the announcer’s voice, “Jon Moxley!”

Mox comes out to Wild Thing, a sneer on his face that almost makes Adam giggle. The boos are loud, almost deafening. Matt and Nick look bewildered, but Kenny leans over and says something to them and they boo as well.

The match goes by in a whirlwind, and Adam almost forgets at the end that he’s not supposed to kick out.

When the referee, one of Eddie’s friends from work, Aubrey, counts to three, Adam’s pretty sure he can hear Nick booing the loudest.

“Good job,” Mox says, beaming at Adam. “You killed it.”

“You too.” Adam has to remember to look disappointed as he rolls out of the ring. When he gets backstage, Eddie practically mauls him.

“You did fuckin’ great, baby!” he yells, clapping Adam on the shoulder.

Adam grins at him. “Thanks. It felt really good.”

Mox comes in after him and pretty much does maul Adam, sending him careening to the floor in a way reminiscent of the pin from earlier.

“Hi,” Adam says.

“Hi,” Mox says. “You did so good.” He leans down and kisses Adam hard and fast.

“Gross!” yells Ruby from somewhere in the back of the tent.

Mox helps the other wrestlers prepare while Adam sneaks out to watch the rest of the matches next to Matt.

“You did awesome!” Nick says. “That was so cool.”

Matt’s face is a little pinched. “Mox was kind of mean to you.”

“He’s supposed to be mean, Matt,” Kenny eyes, rolling his eyes. “He’s the heel. That’s the bad guy.” He glances over to Adam for confirmation. He nods. It’s kind of nice to be the one they check in with. “It’s all pretend, right?”

“It’s all pretend,” Adam confirms. “Well, except for the getting an arm across the chest. That kind of hurt.” He rubs at it, the ache blooming as he mentions it.

Matt turns into a googly eyed disaster when Yuta gets in the ring. He enters to American Idiot and Matt claps like a maniac.

“Nick,” Adam says, leaning behind Adam. “Do we need to sedate Matt or something?”

Nick laughs. “Nah, just let him be in love. He’s being super weird about Yuta.”

“Am not!” Matt snaps. “He’s so smart. He’s in tenth grade and he’s in my senior level Calculus class. It’s…” He trails off. “Oh. Oh and he’s got abs.” He pauses. “Maybe I do need to be sedated.”

Adam laughs as the music changed to Do Ya Think I’m Sexy? That entrance music is one among many reasons Eddie hates Claudio, but Adam thinks it’s hilarious.

The match is quick, as expected, as it’s Yuta’s first, but Yuta does great and sells like a champ.

Matt audibly gasps as Claudio hauls Yuta up in his signature swing, spinning Yuta until he taps out and collapses to the floor.

“Should I go check on him?” Matt asks, looking over at Adam. “He looks hurt.”

“He’s fine,” Adam says. “But I’m sure Yuta would be very pleased if you ran ringside and got all concerned about him.”

Matt nods and leaps out of his chair, running over to the ring. “Wheeler!” he calls. “Are you alright?”

Adam, Nick, and Kenny laughs at Yuta’s bewildered face. “Uh, yeah,” he says. He glances at Adam, who shrugs and grins.

“Go for it,” Adam mouths.

“I, uh, could use some help getting to the back,” Yuta says, doing his best to look miserable and hurt. It doesn’t quite work on the rest of the crowd, Adam thinks, but it sure as hell works on Matt.

“Of course!” Matt helps Yuta out of the ring and bats his eyelashes as they go back to the tent.

“I can’t believe Matt got a boyfriend at your wrestling thing,” Nick grumbles, folding his arms over his chest. “I have got to get out there.”

“You will, champ,” Adam says, clapping Nick on the shoulder. “You will.”

Matt and Yuta come back holding hands and chatting with stars in their eyes, and the rest of the show goes off without a hitch. Bryan and Eddie may literally be trying to kill each other during their match, but Eddie wins and it’s an overall success.

“We usually head to Willow’s house after matches,” Adam says as Mox comes up behind him and curls around him. “If you three wanted to come?”

“Yeah, sure!” Matt says. “Wheeler, do you need a ride?”

Wheeler looks shocked, as he’d ridden with Mox and Adam to the show. Adam stares at him, hoping Yuta gets the hint. “Uh. Sure! Sure, I could need a ride.”

“And Kenny and Nick, if you want to hop in my truck,” Adam says insistently.

Nick nods. “Yeah, I don’t want to be anywhere near whatever the two of them are doing.”

As Adam watches Matt smoothly pull out of the parking spot like it’s nothing, clearly chattering nonstop to Yuta, he takes the lead and drives the short distance to Willow’s house.

“Hey, Mox,” Nick says. “So, if you and I were in the ring, which of us would win?”

“Oh, I’d fuckin’ flatten you in seconds.”

“Would not!”

Adam laughs, and thinks that, maybe, he’s got it figured out. At least for now.

~

Mini Playlist: Bronco - Orville Peck Wild Thing - The Troggs American Idiot - Green Day Do Ya Think I'm Sexy? - Rod Stewart

[wicked-storybrooke]

7, 9 (for Kathryn), 10, 12, 13 and 21 for the OUAT asks!

Thank you!!

7) Character you'd love to punch in the face

Oooh, good question! I'm a pacifist so I could never actually do it but I mean, I would choose Viktor's dad but I think Gerhardt well and truly took care of that! I guess I'll go with Gothel because it would be funny. Honourable mentions are George, Isla, Arthur, Glinda (but not Wicked's Glinda. I would never do that to her) and Killian as an act of vengeance on my boy Will's behalf for those extremely uncalled-for punches in 'The Apprentice'. Oh my God and Zelena's dad! He infuriates me! Also, if Tamara wants she can fight me. I'd be very much okay with that!

9) Headcanon about Kathryn

I believe she and David become close friends and develop a sibling-like relationship. I like to believe it was already like that for them in the EF and I hope she became good friends with Snow too.

I like to believe she got the therapy she needed after being drugged and locked in a basement because that must have been so traumatic! And I'm conflicted about what would happen with her relationship with Regina. I want them to make up and be friends or even lovers (that would be pretty awesome) but Regina wanting her dead is such a betrayal. Still, she's a very forgiving person, so I can see her accepting a much-needed apology.

10) Favorite backstory

This is a difficult question and one I struggled with when writing my ideas for a gif set for the upcoming ouattober event. I was going to make the set for Alice Jones but then I realised the major reason why I love her backstory is because of fanfiction and headcanons! We don't get that much of her in 'Knightfall'. It's mostly centred around Wish Hook. And I love him to bits but my favourite parts of the flashback portion of that episode are by far the father-daughter moments and the part where he's banished from the tower. The pirate-y stuff doesn't interest me as much. So my favourite backstory is Alice's but only with the addition of fanfictions and headcanons I've accepted and confused with canon. But I believe overall, going solely with canon, my favourite backstory is Red's in Red-Handed. I was so obsessed with the twist of her being the wolf when I first watched. It made me love the show even more. I hate horror but I love the horror themes in this episode. Snow and Red's friendship in it was so cute and Granny is just awesome and has an intriguing dynamic with Red. Red and Peter were adorable and my heart fell through Australia when the poor, sweet guy got eaten.

12) A line/quote that you connected with the first time you heard it.

Ooh! I love this question. Let me think back. I believe it was "People are gonna tell you who you are your whole life. "You just gotta punch back and say, "No, this is who I am". You want people to look at you differently? Make them!" I really took it to heart. But as time has gone on I've come to realise that you don't need to make others look at you differently. You can't control how others look at you. Someone can be the most confident person in the world and someone else out there probably sees them as nothing more than a clown. The important thing is that that person is confident- for the sake of themselves, not others. It doesn't matter how others see you. There's no point trying to control that. Life isn't about impressing others. It's about finding contentment from within and forming and discovering your own identity in a way that is satisfying and in a way that fosters joy.

13) Most powerful scene

This one springs to mind.

21) If you could remove or alter any one episode's backstory, which would it be, and why?

Oh my God, Ill-Boding patterns. First of all, why and how did Baelfire get a curly perm?? (/jk. You rock those curls, Bae! You can borrow my mum's curling iron. Though not sure where you can plug it in the Enchanted Forest!) Second of all, what does that title even mean?? And third and most importantly why would you assassinate Baelfire's character like that??!! He would never, ever murder someone- at least not at that age. It goes against his whole character and everything he stands for. I was absolutely speechless and so ridiculously upset when it happened. Just, no! And the way he became so ludicrously blood-thirsty after that! It was bizarre! The whole thing was obviously made to shock the audience but it wasn't worth it at the expense of making a character with such strong moral values (at that age, at least) so absurdly ooc. I'm still so mad about it and point blank refuse to accept it as canon. I don't know who that kid was but he clearly kidnapped and stole Baelfire's life and Rumple just hadn't noticed because his Lizard contact lenses were obstructing his eyes!

I would have made it so that Beowulf would see Baelfire had the dagger and upon realising what it could do, he would threaten the boy with a sword or just his extremely imposing height and Rumple would straight up murder him to protect his son. And he would relish it, which would make Baelfire feel unbearably guilty, further supporting the reason for his determination to rid his father of the darkness. He would feel like it was his responsibility because he didn't stop his father from murdering Beowulf in cold blood when he had the power to, which would have cemented Rumple's bloodlust and descent into darkness. Or heck, just have Baelfire order Rumple to cut out Beowulf's tongue. I don't think he'd do that either but literally anything would have been better than what happened.

[hopelesstvaddict]

Jon and Sansa's relationship is fragile because of Jon's insecurities

[So we're back. Instead of full reviews I think I'm just gonna write about specific subjects that make me pause and think, more than the general episodes]

So we've been treated with Jon's return to Winterfell and his rocky relationship with Sansa resumes. Again. Ain't this old by now ? Perhaps not.

Jon and Sansa are at their most affectionate when it comes to hugs but this second time, Sansa keeps focused on what's important. I don't really understand why Jon would take issue with Sansa speaking up at the council in the Great Hall; she brought up very valid points. Saving the world is important of course but people tend to forget what needs to happen behind the scenes in order to ensure that. I think I'm not alone in this but I also wondered why she didn't take into account Dany's army when preparing all the food storing. While that can be blamed on sloppy writing and it's fair to say that she could have at least entertained the idea, it's also fair to remember that Jon's main idea was first to mine dragonglass and then try to convince Dany to help them. Sansa was not convinced he would succeed; in her mind, Dany would only care about her throne. So far she's not proven entirely wrong. And we also have to remember that Jon didn't send any message to her for a long time and certainly not before he knelt. Probably the last scroll she got was something like 'Hey I'm ok' and then next thing she knew he had bent the knee. So by this time it was already too late to gather whatever food was necessary. Plus I think it's safe to say the entire North brought what food was available FOR THE NORTH ONLY. Obviously there wasn't much and in any case, even if she had been warned she'd have to feed many more, there wouldn't have been enough. Sansa takes care of all this, and all the political stuff - things that both Jon and Dany do not care about and have little regard for. Jon still doesn’t quite realize how much he needs Sansa to handle all of this because he doesn’t realize how important it is. Yet.

The scene that stood out the most takes place during Jon and Arya's reunion in which Jon tries to dismiss Sansa. Live reaction: Ok so we're back to this 'Jon-putting-down-his-sister' nonsense? At first view, it's quite infuriating to see Jon acting this way and it's hard to believe these two ever found a way to unite and effing retake Winterfell. But once you stop and think about it, this little exchange yields so much to analyze.

As many pointed out, Jon likely tries to revert to a childhood joke he shared with Arya when they were younger and used to diss their sister together. Fair point. Siblings often side against one another. But that shows several things. Jon has been away from Arya all series long and he doesn't realize yet that she's not his little baby sister anymore. His conversation about Needle further proves the point. In any case, Arya is having none of it and supports Sansa. We're all here for this.

Here Jon seemingly tries to diminish Sansa's intelligence. But he knows that she really IS smarter than everyone else. He knows it. So I think part of what's going on here is that Jon works as the embodiment of the last part of the general audience who still thinks that Sansa is useless and this scene was written for Arya - a known fan favorite - to dismiss this and assert her support of Sansa - to really drive home this idea. The scene with Tyrion (another fan favorite) serves a similar purpose.

Narratively, beyond Jon dismissing Sansa yet again, this reads as another instance where it's more about Jon than it is about Sansa. Several times Jon has confronted Sansa about her asserted cleverness - and all those times, she's been right - and each time it boiled down to Jon's lack of self-confidence and the need to prove himself to his sister. When she told him that Ramsey was more devious than what he thought, his first reaction was to boast about his military achievements. When she told him to be smarter than Robb and their father, his reaction was to half-jokingly dismiss her offer of counsel. This essentially is a version of him saying 'Yeah she's smart but so am I and I wish she saw it too'

This ties closely with the rest of the exchange where Arya tells him that Sansa is defending the family. Pay attention to what Jon says next - specifically the choice of phrasing it.

There is so much to draw from that line. He doesn't say 'She's my family too' or 'she's our family' or 'I'm your family too'. His choice of words means 'I, Jon, am part of Sansa's family too'. That singles out Sansa as Jon's focus for discontent. He could have said 'I'm your family' or just 'I'm family too' and that would have included Bran and Arya as well. But no, Sansa alone is who Jon focuses on. This shows that he still has some unresolved issues with her - even after all that happened between them. After two seasons of her repeatingly validating him, her saying out loud 'You're a Stark to me' he still doubts HER in particular

Perhaps that boils down to her behavior towards him when they were children since this comes up again later. A seemingly random bit of conversation but one can't help but wonder why this was brought up again. Jon and Sansa weren't close growing up and Jon is a deeply insecure person, being a bastard and all that and it's understandable that he would have a hard time letting go of all these presumptions when they all but defined his childhood. She was the sole of his siblings to make him feel like he didn't have a real place in the family (to make it very simple), hence why he doesn't have a problem with Arya or Bran. Yet.

But how can Sansa change that ? A girl can repeat her support for him so much and reassure him all the time but really it's up to Jon to get past childish jabbing and accept the woman his sister has become and that she's genuine in her concern towards him. That she's changed.

'I'm her family too' is another way of saying 'I'm part of her family too so why is she always antagonizing me/fighting me/disagreeing with me?' Jon still thinks Sansa doesn't consider him family and she's the last one not to in his mind.

The choice of words also emphasizes the 'I'. Rather than say 'she' and put focus on Sansa alone, the use of 'I' brings the sentence back to Jon and puts the spotlight on him as well. 'I am part of her family too'. As if he's saying it out loud and repeating it so that perhaps his thick brain will finally accept it. This is a clever exchange that foreshadows the existential/identity crisis that he's going to go through no later than before the end of the episode. Which renders Arya's 'Don't forget that' quite unsubtle. This will be Jon’s final storyline, the resolution of the one problem that defined him at the beginning of the story.

This need to gain Sansa's approval is driven further in the scene the two of them share later on (another candlelit setting). We have yet to see Jon interact with Bran or Arya but Jon is decidedly different with Sansa. Perhaps that's because they're the eldest. Perhaps that's because they're closer in age. Perhaps that's because they are the leaders of their House. Perhaps that's because they went to war together. In any case, Jon is wary, unsure and insecure about how she feels about him. He doesn’t look to Sansa the way he affectionately looks to Arya or Bran. A smile is rare when he interacts with Sansa. He yells, they don't see eye to eye, he feels like she belittles him, he feels hurt and at the end of it, this :

This is him asking her for reassurance. Asking for a clear answer. 'Please trust me. Please tell me that you support me'. He craves her validation. After he all but dismissed her in front of Arya. Why go see her? Why take her intel so close to his heart then ?

To which she responds 'You know I do'. Two things to take from this. First, once again she reassures him and reasserts her support and loyalty to him. Second, 'YOU KNOW I do' means 'you already know the answer'. This shows that in her mind, Jon should ALREADY know that he has acquired her undying support - probably against her better judgement. Newsflash : he doesn’t.

Can we stop now for a second and breathe a sigh of relief that Sansa has grown confident enough to be sure of who she is and not question Jon's lack of faith in her ? Thank the Gods one of them has their shit together because if she were like him, this wouldn't go anywhere.

It's possible that her not lashing out at him and instead adopting this quiet, sad behavior is also the manifestation of her own fear towards him - that he effectively abandoned her. For all the tough 'no one can protect me' behavior, anyone is going to be touched to have someone pledge to protect them.

Anyway, Sansa trusts Jon but he doesn't. It's quite interesting that he was the one asking for mutual trust before and yet he is the one in the end who can't totally do it because in his heart, he is still deeply insecure about her. Sure there were some steps made. Ensuring the safety of the North and entrusting her with it was a huge improvement. But still, we see that on a personal level he is quite not there.

The obvious question then is WHY. Why is he still insecure ? And why Sansa in particular ? The beginning of an answer can be found in the relationship he had with her while they were children and how it compares to Arya and Bran. Maybe that's just remnants of that strained relationship.

But if Sansa has changed and for the better and Jon still struggles to accept it, let's just hope that a similar situation doesn't arise with Arya and Bran. Let's rule out the latter since he's all about the zen attitude but we've already seen that Arya is not Jon's Arya anymore and that she will stand beside Sansa when needed. For now, Jon has no reason to doubt Arya like he does Sansa. When the reveal about his parentage comes out, how will Sansa and Arya react ? If he can't handle the thought of one sister seemingly doubting him, what's it going to be if it's two sisters ?

All of this insecurity regarding Sansa - for now - is at least partly in preparation of the drama that is sure to unfold in the next weeks. Jon fears that Sansa doesn't see him as family and now, he has even more reason to be afraid. All the drama that has happened between them for seasons boils down to this deep fear of not being accepted by her and now we're in for the culmination. There will be a lot of fighting, we’re told. Jon will sulk and convince himself that he was right in the end, that he wasn't part of the family and more so, that SHE was right not to accept him. Sansa on the other hand, I suspect, will mainly fight to make him accept once and for all that he is a Stark. That's the passionate fight for her this season. To make her family complete.

Another interesting thing to note - as others have observed - is that the conversation is left unfinished.

Sansa asks if Jon loves Dany and he doesn't respond. Once again, Sansa demonstrates - to us and to Jon - how perceptive she is, how well she can read people, and him specifically. As of now, Jon’s relationship with Dany is still a secret and yet she has figured it out.

What's really notable is that this is a pattern in a lot of Sansa/Jon conversations, specifically the ones where they argue in private. Compare this one to the tent scene in 6x09 or the one in 7x01 right after the council or even in 6x07 when they argue about the men they have. We have Sansa and Jon arguing heatedly then the conversation tones down to soft, sad voices and then it ends before resolution can happen, either because they choose to end it there, someone else interrupts or we simply are denied to see it.

Sansa and Jon have been arguing ever since they reunited. Every season they were pitted against each other as the siblings who fought. Now in the final season, it's still brought up and used in the narrative. Meaning that it means something, that it's important to the story. We saw that Arya and Sansa fought in Season 7. It was tied to their old bickering from childhood and ultimately it was resolved and now Arya stands by her sister. Narratively, a conflict plaguing characters has to be resolved when the story comes to its conclusion. Sansa and Jon’s storyline has been going on since Season 6 now, so their relationship HAS TO come to a resolution, one way or another. And it'll be all about Jon finally accepting that he is a Stark and about him accepting that Sansa has accepted it.

[bombshellsandbluebells]

This gon' be an essay. I can't believe this needs to be explicitly said, but... Don't trust your engineers to lead you in war, kids. Unless they were in military academy. Then, by all means, trust your engineers with your dear life. Engineers are trained to solve problems, to look at them from all different angles, and consider different worst-case scenarios to conduct preventive actions. They can win you wars (remember Alan Turing; we'll forever be indebted to that man), they can prevent (1)

catastrophes, create catastrophes, they can save lives. In hospital (some of them, at least), as patients, your life depends on its engineers more than you know. When taking decisions, they isolate the problem, consider the factors, they come up with many possible solutions and choose most suitable ones. They’re trained to be clear, concise, correct, but also creative. They value efficiency and functionality. They must be able to function as a team, but also know when to take actions, (2)

and not rely on other opinions and authorities (this especially). They must be able to adapt to any situation. (At this point, it sounds like I’m waxing poetry lmao) They’re good strategist material in theory. But they’re not war strategists. Engineers without military background—engineers who aren’t soldiers and didn’t go to the academy and/or are not in military—cannot and shouldn’t be in charge in such situations, unless absolutely necessary. They’re not know-it-all and they’re not trained (3)

for that. They are civilians. Who are more useful in war than some other civilians when recruited, but they’re still civilians. There are different types of engineers for that—naval and military engineers, who often are certified electrical and mechanical engineering professionals. Raven Reyes isn’t one of them. She isn’t a soldier, she isn’t a warrior. She was not even a gunner, or part of the guard. Raven also still doesn’t have much experience. And, as brilliant as one person can be, (4)

experience in this field is important and can sometimes be crucial. Sinclair and Jaha had years and years of experience, and, what’s even more important, they always had older mentors to coach them. Raven is only in her early twenties. All other engineers are dead—Clarke only included one of each type in her list. Raven made mistakes, and will make mistakes, especially if she’ll continue to work on her own. (Raven, immaturely and selfishly, went on an illegal spacewalk that cost The Ark two (5)

months worth of oxygen and was the one responsible for the culling.) There will come situations when she won’t know what to do. The 100 doesn’t show that. Her fans forget. I believe this whole discourse is a result of a few different factors and cannot be solved unless each factor is tackled with. No matter how many meta posts some people write. Fans would need to observe the plot and actions unemotionally. (I mean no offense; what I’m trying to say is: people will ignore them and try to (6)

justify and prove their interpretation of the show as the correct one.) The only other solution is to remove Echo from this “problem”, and instead look at Raven, Indra, and Diyoza, who are all loved in the fandom. It isn’t the same, but there’d be less resistance to truly understand and accept the situation from certain part of the fandom. Engineers can adapt and work in sectors other than their own (naval mechanical engineers, for example, can work in other facilities, too), but they cannot (7)

do the things people in this fandom think they can. Not to mention that there are factors even experienced war strategists cannot predict. “can you really blame people for not liking when she’s taking the lead over Raven?” Engineers will work with people they don’t agree with professionally. I’m sure this is same in other fields too. Some have the responsibility to make a judgement whether to break the rules given by their superiors. These people don’t have the luxury of making the decisions (8)

about whether they’ll listen to someone based on their opinions of their bosses or colleagues. You shouldn’t be a mechanical engineer if you’re thinking, “I wouldn’t listen to Echo because I fucking hate her and I think I’m smarter. And prettier than her”. When you’re doing your job, there’s no Echo that you fucking hate, there’s a qualified person who’s telling you something you need to take into consideration, evaluate the problem, evaluate this person’s idea, and decide what the best (9)

solution is. It doesn’t matter if it’s your boss, the person you love, the person you trust, the person you’re the boss to, or the person you hate. You can’t “do your own thing” and “try to take over” just because you hate Echo and you think you’d do much better job (since, well, you think she’s a horrible person) because your ego might quite literally blow stuff up and then you’re all effed up, or maybe even dead. This behavior might lead to tragedies. I heard about similar situations. (10)

This applied on the Ark too. The engineers were responsible for all the Sky people up there. Raven doesn’t think the way the fans do, or at least I hope she doesn’t. She’s way more mature now, and also aware she’s unqualified. Another thing, every person is an antagonist in someone’s story. Echo isn’t the antagonist and Clarke the protagonist period. We just happened to hear this particular story from Clarke’s point of view. Clarke is an antagonist, or even villain, in someone else’s story (11)

just like Raven, Bellamy, Monty, and others are. There were a few true villains in the show, but… that’s another story and a different topic.

Anon, I’m so sorry I’m just now getting the chance to read this, but MAN, what a great read. You just summed up why this whole “Echo took the lead” discourse is ridiculous so much better than I could. 

I don’t even have anything to add. (I mean….I could rant about the last thing you said all day long, but…like you said that’s a whole other topic) this is just brilliant. Thank you.

[witchysleepingbeauty]

Hi princess! So imagine this lady who's always ALWAYS being negative abt her kids, never a kind word and only belittling, every other day, like "what did I do wrong really? What kind of kids have I raised? They're bla bla bla" with venom. And worst who doesnt acknowledge how negative + painful she is

When i try to talk to her nd ask her exactly whats the issue with 'me' or how can I help her to ease her burden as she keeps complaining how we're ungrateful or keeps comparing to other 'more acceptable in her eyes" children, she gets defensive nd won't answer properly. She says "ohhh, why don't U know that? arent u old enough to know?' and then starts ranting. when time after time ive begged her to clearly tell me, no passiv agressiveness please! it doesn't work nd i end up wondering why i even bother when im only the villain... Yes this ig is my role in her story that ive writen? confusing 😅

when I can, sometimes i try to help her even tho shes the sort who likes to stay busy so she'll find smth else to do lol, nd inside hope for her to be at least a little NOT negative today.... she either ignores or gets angrier nd goes all "hey, I didn't ask U to do that! How dare u act like u did me a favor! U think ur perfect while im just ur servant right?" when i never even intend that? i effing HATE negative reinforcement nd i feel so damn bad for her, nd shes taught me how negative reinforcement is the worst thing to use, cuz it never teaches anything only builds resentment!!

this is smth i realised that she cant be pleased, she wants to get attention what I mean is, whenever we spend time together, she is perfectly fine when we're talking abt her hobbies nd interests which tbh im NOT that interested in personally but since she likes them i like to discuss them with her nd help her out with projects. not to say "ohhh im so cool i help out with her projects look at me so kind of me! lol" its just it hurts when ur own mother doesn't even rpetend to care abt ur interests. i suspect deep down i carried this feeling of unworthiness ie if even my own mother doesn't care abt my hobbies/projects, no one will . which is why i feel so uncomfortable sharing anything personal to my rl friends cuz im so afraid theyll reject me too :(

By not caring i dont mean I expect her to listen nonstop to me. she has her own life but i mean she purposely zones out, rolls her eyes which HURT SM when i was a child, or even worst she says "im not interested" nd shuts the convo. again, at this point, idec anymore as ive learned slowly to value nd cherish my own value nd hobbies etc which is an important lesson anyway

the only thing i want is to stop her being so painfully negative LOUDLY. Yk I suspect becuz of her dwelling on whats wrong in her life, shes gotten severe numbness nd swelling in one arm? and even the doctors cant detect whats wrong! nd its hella painful nd she can't even lift it up sometimes!!!! THIS GOES ON TO SHOW HOW INNER CONSTANT NEGATIVITY CAN BE REFLECTED IN THE OUTER AKA OUR BODY!! To anyone else who cant help have negative thoughts ONLY, u gotta try to change them! Please! Bcuz my mother's pain in her arm is sometimes crazily too much! Nd this in turn, esp on days where all i hear is her gripe, its worse at night!

Anyway I was compeled to write this as a while ago i went to the kitchen for water nd from her room i heard her loudly complain nd mutter abt how her kids are "socially unacceptable" nd "dear god i pray please please don't let me rely on them in old age, i made a mistake raising them!" She's the sort whos got so many limiting beliefs that initially led to my deep unhappiness w/o knowng it was these beliefs at play eg if you dont become a certain career, youll have no security, or recently she keeps nd keeps lamenting abt not havjng 'enoufh money' (we r having kinda financial crisis due to some rlly terrible decisions by my other parent) or 'oh Im STUCK with this [bad word] family!" when she saw a movie abt someone who went on a trip nd began comparing her own life to it. She's so talented we all ask her to start an online business but she backs away nd says 'how will i ever get capital? im doomed to never have what i want' nd I myself have a bit empty wallet temporarily so i cant help her. Nyway, while im trying to fix my own beliefs, seeing her rage nd let negativity completly take over her is alarming nd worrying to me. it makes me feel negative emotions too. im not entirely confident in mastering my mind ywt. i was that overly sensitive kid at school nd i absorv her energy a lot. Those who u love the most, hurt u the most. nd i agree bcoz while im hurt by her (not that shes intentionally hurting me. THRU her im hurt), i do love her. Nd now thanks to the law ik by changing my beliefs abt things, i can change the world

My reason is i cant change her bcuz she gets hella maddened if i suggest a less negative thought. Nd she instead starts blaming me for my 'decisions in Life' which SHE would NEVERRR make oh no... -_- Nd im not saying i try to be obnoxious abt it hell no! im talking abt getting frustrated at the table talking abt smth abt a random topic, then suddenly listening to her start complaining abt e g. Some kid whos "richer" than i am heatedly! nd if i steer the convo away, nope, she keeps fuming a bit

so since i can only change myself, how the hell do i change my assumptions of her? i affirm having a great mother, happy nd open with her thriving business etc. i affirm this but i cant focus cuz doing so inevitbly makes me sad lol cuz i rmmbr how happy nd liveky she used to be before some unfortunate things in our family that started yrs ago. Which affected us all. Any advice, please? im on a mental diet hwoever the earlier incident of her complaining abt us again caused smth in me to snap. im distancing myself from her but the short times im with her there's only a strong air of disapproval, pain nd misery around her. Tbh i was like that pre-law, not knowing how destructiv my thoughts were, while she was the happy optimistic grateful one. Nd now? Im only slightly more self aware than before ie im NOT saying im able to rise in consiousness SOo much that im 'untouchable' nd buddha-like! Nor is my mom wrong bcuz she's me pushed out! its only her lvl of conciousness nd thats it. its just I don't want to cause or feel more pain or hav any excuse to curse her ,when ego sometimes takes over, anymore. im having some personal issues to take care of too, which is why this is affecting me too much. Sort of like having a weak immune system already?

I want my happy intelligent mom back. ik i got to change me... but the doing is way harder than the saying

🫀anon

Okay first of all imma say it cause I don’t think nobody else will…. Your mom is shitty…. There, I said it. She is abusive and selfish and a bad mom. No parent should ever treat their children that way and make them think they need to fix them.

Other than that yes it’s true she is your manifestation but I think it’s important to let emotions out. Be mad at her for once, stop rationalizing her bad behavior. You have the right to feel mad, angry, sad. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID.

I know it seems impossible to keep a mental diet when you see the negative behavior you wish to change every day. I assume you live in the same house. My suggestion is to stick to your mental diet and try to interact as little with her as possible. Go out more often or stay a bit more in your room. Every time you see a behavior from her that you don’t like, and you feel like affirming doesn’t help, close your eyes and see her hugging you and telling you all sorts of beautiful, loving things you’d like to hear from her.

You should also work on your self concept. Parental issues often manifest from poor self concept. Affirmations like “I am worthy, I am loved, I am enough, I am respected, I am cherished” work amazing.