#why are you still reading my personal outlet?

[distantwave]

[alexanderwales]

"I don't think I could have the relationship with you that you have with me," she said. She was very casual about it, and I was immediately on the defensive.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked.

She put the book she'd been reading down. "It's just, the way you've described it, and the vibe that I get, I don't think I could do it how you do it."

"I still don't know what that means," I said.

"You're always doing this like ... micro calculation thing," she said. "You weigh your words. You try to time things. You have never once called me up while I was at work, or asked me for something when it was inconvenient for me, and you check and double check that you're not being a nuisance."

"And ... that's bad?" I asked.

"No, I love that about you," she said. "It's very kind and considerate. I know that if I tell you I'm not in the mood to hang out, you'll apologize and not push it. If you suggest that we get pizza and I say I'd rather have Korean BBQ, you fold instantly and we get Korean BBQ. I like that. I get the things I want. But it seems like an exhausting way to deal with people."

"I want you to be happy," I said with a small voice.

"I am happy," she replied. "You're great. You remember when we first got together I was like 'hey, look, if you want pizza, we can get pizza, it's just not what I'm in the mood for', and you kept insisting that you didn't care, that you would rather have me follow my needs? And I just thought, 'you know, maybe I should just trust that's what they actually feel'. And it is, as far as I can tell. There's not some secret part of you that wants me to break your way."

"You think I'm ... a simpering coward?" I asked. Even as I said it, it felt too accusatory, the wrong thing to say in the situation.

"Whoa, no, not at all," she laughed. "I think you do all that stuff because ... I don't know, you want to? Because otherwise why would you do it? It's how you are with every aspect of your life, you're a tryhard. I mean you said to me that you wanted to reclaim the term. Your relationship with me is that you're a tryhard (affectionate)."

"And you're ... not?" I asked.

"I'm not that way with anyone," she replied. "You know why I hang out with you so much? It's 'cause I like you. Most days, I am very much in the mood for you, and if you ask for a meetup, I'll say yes, and if you don't ask for one, then I'll ask you first. And for you ..."

"What?" I asked.

"It's like ... you're keeping track," she said. "You want to make sure that you're not sending me more messages than I'm sending you. You're balancing social micro stuff that I don't pay attention to. You're consciously monitoring how much each of us has said and making sure it's the right number of words or whatever."

"It's really not about the number of words," I replied. "It's more ... making sure that social and emotional labor is equitable, that there's a good rhythm to the conversation. I don't think you'd get good results by tracking word count."

"But see, I don't do any of that," she said. "I talk because I feel like talking. I listen when you need to vent because I like you and it feels good to give you an outlet. I mean you are undoubtedly putting in a bunch of work, and for me, there's no work. That's all I meant, really."

"You've thought about it," I said.

"Oh, I'm just reading this book, and there are two characters like us in it, and I was like 'yes, exactly', and then 'that would not work for me'." She shrugged.

"And if I stopped 'putting in the work'?" I asked. "Would we still be ... friends?"

"See, I don't know," she said. "Because that's never who you've been. You're asking me if I would still be friends with you if you changed your personality and how we interact with each other. Maybe? Probably? Who knows? Maybe we'd be better friends somehow. Maybe we're just two basically compatible people, and every time you've ever worried about anything it would actually have been completely fine."

"Or maybe it's load-bearing," I said.

"Maybe!" she replied with a smile that slowly faded. "You okay?"

"I'm thinking," I said. I didn't know if I could verbalize what I was thinking in a way that would be palatable.

"Do you not like being this way with me?" she asked. "Because I have never asked you to. I've made my preferences known, but if you've been bending yourself into knots and feeling a burden, then ..."

"No," I said, because I knew it was what she wanted to hear. "No, I like the way things are between us."

"Good," she smiled. "I do too."

[ochibrochi]

spontaneous magic manifestation was NOT mentioned in the parenting handbook 😬

I know this isn’t how magic in dc works, but the fact that Damian’s ancestry includes some pretty powerful magic users is… INTERESTING 🤔? Drabble under the cut!

I wanna preface that I'M NOT SAYIN' that Damian should/does have magic powers, but there’s still so much unexplored potential with Damian's character, and the thought that he has a dormant adeptness in magic is somewhat compelling to me. Most importantly it would FREAK! BRUCE! OUT!!!!! What is this, magic puberty 😭??

By DC laws, anyone has the ability to learn magic, but it is also possible to be an innate ability. The Al Ghuls are no strangers to the occult-- Ra's has had increasingly been portrayed as a magic user, and the recent establishment of his mother being a sorceress/witch?? Even Talia dabbled in a bit of magic, I think. There is a catch that their power is suggested to be due to Lazarus exposure, but for arguments sake let's say the Al Ghul lineage is inherently proficient in magic (and Lazarus exposure simply enhances it).

I can't recall "magic" being a part of Damian's training/upbringing (I'm still slowly catching-up on Damian comics so apologies if I miss any canon examples of magic use). Not sure why Talia wouldn't want her little "heir to an ancient assassin empire baby" to learn magic, but it would at least give reason to Damian not knowing about his magic potential, or lack of interest in it.

Through the power of pseudo storytelling, what if Damian's encounter with Mother Soul could have triggered a manifestation of magic that was once dormant; like a pressure cooker waiting to explode with energy when it hasn't been given a safe outlet.

I've yet to read a satisfying arc where Damian truly gets to contemplate his Al Ghul roots outside of "dad is good guy, mum is bad guy". Damian's initial character growth stems from him running away from, and renouncing his association with the League (i.e. "I'm nothing like you, mother and grandfather!").

The most recent thing I've read was Robin (2021), and whilst Damian is much more cordial with his mother, there's still an emotional distance and sense of distrust/resentment (for good reason, even if the context was some cartoonishly evil writing). But there is a silver-lining that they still appear to be fond of each other, in a melancholy kind of way.

Realizing he's "genetically" primed for magic would be especially confronting to Damian. There's no denying his Al Ghul blood, forcing him to confront a facet of himself he can no longer ignore or reject. A family that he likely has to approach for help/guidance.

Damian is put in a position of acknowledging this power could be used for good, to be stronger, to fight crime, balancing it with the implication that what he possesses could be rooted in dark magic (Lazarus enchantment).

If he decides to embrace it, would that be too much of an endorsement of the Al Ghul's dark occultism? Can he separate the two ideas? What if he can't control it? What if he accidentally hurts someone? What if has the ability to save someone where his other skills fall short?

Ideally, I'd love for this hypothetical story to lead into Damian exploring his Al Ghul heritage more intimately, historically, and spiritually (à la RSoB: Year of Redemption adventures). Another little coming-of-age self discovery journey.

I have my own little personal thoughts on what Damian decides to do with his magic powers, but I'd like to leave that open to interpretation... By the end of it I hope that he will at least find some forgiveness over resentment, and a balance between accepting that side of his family a little easier. It is finally a sense of inner peace :)

Any thoughts? Did I get any characterisation wrong? Let's talk over on my DC blog @arkhamochi! I'm currently trying to read all Damian-centric comics until I catch up with the current run. I'm hungry for discussion and analysis!!!!!!

[reblive]

An except from Eric’s journal that i’ve thought about often as of lately. I have no place to put my thought so I will speak on here. No intent for discourse, I just have no outlet to speak on this matter. If this is not the space for you, just don’t read it. I don’t really care to hear anything.

“Society may not realize what is happening but I have; you go to school, to get used to studying and learning how youre "supposed to" so that drains or filters out a little bit of human nature. but thats after your parents taught you whats right and wrong even though you may think differently, you still must to have more of your human nature blown out of your ass. society trys to make everyone act the same by burying all human nature and instincts. Thats what school, laws, jobs, and parents do If they realize it or not and them, the few who stick to their natural instincts are casted out as psychos or lunatics or strangers or just plain different. crazy, strange, weird, wild, these words are not bad or degrading.. if humans were let to live how we would naturaly it would be chaos and anarchy and the human race wouldnt probably last that long, but hey guess what, thats how its supposed to be!!!!! society and goverments are only created to have order and calmness, which is exactly the opposite of pure human nature. take away all your laws and morals and just see what you can do. if the goverment was one entity it would be thinking "hey, lets make some order here and calm these crazy fucks down so we can be constructive and fight other goverments in our own little so called self created "civilizied world" and get rid of all those damn insticts everyone has" well shit I'm to tired wright anymor tonight, so until next time, fuck you all”

In some way in pains me to see the way he felt about the world and the wrong doings of those around him. If you take a second to sit and read what he’s saying it’s like part of his authenticity comes out and then transitions back to switching to speak to the audience and how he wanted to be seen. I can’t always articulate in words the feelings I get when I think about him but it’s genuinely always painful. He was so hurt, and described his pain, but still shadowed his true feelings of distress for the audience. He cared about what other people thought about him even in his writings, and it’s so disheartening that he was that broken and plague by the environment he was in. I take time to consider how people cannot feel empathy for him and I understand it due to the situation at hand (obviously) however, considering how he was 17 years old writing this, he was just a kid. He was once how we all once were, innocent and compelled to continue on the paths of our lives the way that the nature of society intended us to. It really goes to show how fucked up he had it. This draws me back to the butterfly effect, was there one decision by himself, or inflicted upon him by others that brought him to where he ended his life? Empathy is a theme he seems to disregard in his journal entries, and quite frankly, all of media and the world deems him as un empathetic because of his writings. We didn’t know how he thought of himself in his head, we didn’t know the guilt, destruction, and true pain he went through that was genuine. I find this a reason why there is much more weight put onto him within his person. “It’s only a tragedy if you think it is, and then it’s only a tragedy in your own mind.” (7/29/98) I suppose this is how we all (who empathize with E&D) feel and can relate to.

Thinking too much about his pain these days and what he once was and how he became what he was. Being truthful and honest are two different things. Being truthful, factual, what he did was terrible. Being honest, feelings, I have so much pain in my heart for how he was feeling. There’s nothing anyone can do now (whom empathize)

[showstopper35]

Hello! Do you still write for Tfp/Transformers Prime? If so, I have a request!

Maybe ‘cons reacting to reader dealing with a person that caused a lot of childhood trauma? If this is something that makes you uncomfortable, feel free to ignore it!! I just am dealing with a person who wasn’t the greatest to me as a kid and would really like some headcanon comfort <3

again, feel free to ignore and remember to take care of yourself!

of course! thanks so much for the request, darlin’! I hope you are doing well and my DMs are open if you ever need to talk. 💛

Megatron

-He knows. He knows how it feels to be scorned in your youth. He knows how much you hurt. He also knows that he wouldn’t be the best at comforting you, so he provides a distraction. -Every time you come to him an anxious, frustrated mess because of them, he takes you to stargaze or to read or just sit on the top of the ship in peace. -Megatron entertains you will tales of when he was younger, fighting for the freedoms he still believes in. You know he’s been hurt too and there’s a comfort in knowing you both still are yet to move on from that past, and that’s okay. You’ll confront it when you are stronger.

Starscream

-He’s not…the best at comforting people. But he is angry. So angry. Why would anyone hurt you? Especially when you were so small? He’s felt small every day of his life, he can’t imagine what sort of monster does that to a sparkling.

-Honestly, he turns into an outlet for your rage. Want to scratch something up? He finds things for you to break, things for you to throw. It's not the most healthy, but when has anything he ever done been?

-When all your anger has been exhausted, he just sits with you. That helps more, and he knows that, but he won't say anything. And that's okay.

Knockout

-Out of all the cons I think he would be the most helpful. He pampers you, taking you on long drives and god-awful drive-in movies to distract you. He's also willing to just listen to you vent to him while he's working in the medbay.

-If the harmful person comes back, you can bet he's got his saw blade out and will not hesitate to bring them down. He provides you with a free escape ride if you are ever in an uncomfortable situation.

-He is always, always ready to shower you with compliments, especially when he picks up that you've had a bad day. And if you don't feel like telling him what's going on, he will distract you with the randomest stories about himself. It always makes you laugh.

Breakdown

-You better believe that this guy's got hugs for days for you. After many, many, many threats to whomever is hurting you, he sits with you and listens to you vent.

-His attempts at reassuring comments aren't the best, but he tries. He'd much rather go pound the jerk to dust, though.

-He somehow smuggles a shitload of chocolate and ice cream up to the Nemesis for you. Most of the ice cream melts before you can eat it, but it is still delicious.

Arachnid

-The person who is hurting you is never seen or heard from again :)

-You don't mention it and neither does she.

Soundwave

-You better believe that you will never go anywhere near your abuser again. He keeps tabs on them, removing you from anywhere within a 5-mile radius of them. If you do happen to meet them, he is sending Laserbeak and they have roasted limbs from lasers.

-Records everything you say they did and privately keeps it just in case. Not to blackmail them or to send them to the police, of course.

-Lets you play with Laserbeak and pulls up comforting and funny videos to watch with you. He is as silent as ever, but that doesn't change the fact that he cares about you.

Dreadwing

-He pretty much becomes your personal bodyguard. It's a little strange at first, but you get used to his presence and sweet insistence in accompanying you everywhere, especially if you encounter your abuser.

-You can bet that if anything ever happens again with that person, they will go down in a firey explosion orchestrated by his own hand.

-Sucks at speaking to you (about anything, really. he's so stiff.), but when he cleans his weapons, he is happy to listen to you.

Shockwave

-Ah yes, Mr. no emotions. He tries...I think. He'd rather give you some weapon of mass destruction than listen to you detail all of your abuse. I mean, it's a solution, I guess.

-He makes you watch the seekers to learn self-defense and also read some Cybertronian literature on battle tactics.

-At least you can punch now and use poisons?

Predaking

-After learning what had happened to you, he refuses to let you leave his side for weeks. He cares for you and distracts you by terrorizing Starscream on the ship.

-Eventually, though, he accompanies you to meet with the abuser. You talk with them for a bit before he comes crashing down in his dragon form, scaring them into oblivion.

-It felt really good.

[copper-16]

Chapter 8 has been posted - but before everyone goes to read, a little bit of an announcement on my end:

This is going to be my last longer Mapi/Ingrid story, and probably the end of me being super active/posting on ao3 and tumblr. I might write the occasional story here and there, but writing is not bringing me the same joy it once was and I want to dedicate my time to other things. I’ll still be around reading on ao3 and somewhat on Tumblr, but I just won’t be posting a whole ton on either. I’ve been so incredibly lucky to get to know all of you guys on here, and to receive so much love for my work. It means the absolute world to me - and thank you all so much for welcoming me into this little community so wonderfully! I hope the stories I wrote were able to bring just a little bit of happiness when you guys needed it (even if I constantly left everyone on cliffhangers - I truly am sorry about that).

The rest of this is long, and you don't have to read it if you don't want to, you can just go ahead to the story now if you would like. I'm not known for my ability to keep concise, that is for certain. If brevity is the soul of wit - perhaps we know why my stories aren't very funny!

I’ve especially enjoyed joining tumblr and really finding a little community here. Getting to interact with so many people, both those who read my works and those who don’t, has been such a joy for me. I love getting to hear when people like the things I've written, even if it touches them in a small way. I love getting to interact with so many brilliant minds and am forever in awe of how much amazing talent there is in this little corner of the internet! I've made some incredible friends from getting to be on here, and it makes me so happy to have a little community of people I love. Thank you guys for letting me have space here even if I don’t write reader works or know how this app works most of the time.

I started writing seriously in September 2022 and I can't tell you how much joy it has brought me in the last two years. As someone who doesn't enjoy the college degree they are currently getting, this was such a fun creative outlet for me. It was so cool to have this blank canvas to work with, to weave things together, especially as I began to write longer stories. Writing was a place to destress for me and interact with other people who loved football as I was coming to love it. Every single kudos, comment, and bookmark meant so much to me. Even when it was something silly like someone dubbing the 'Copper Monologue,' it made me feel so seen. Someone cared enough to read enough of my works to pick out the fact that I do that? Absolutely mind blowing to me. It's crazy to hear that people cared about the silly little stories I wrote. When someone told me that I was one of the things to help inspire them to write their own stuff - I think I properly sobbed. It meant more to me than anything has in this entire world, and it still does! Writing has helped me to process, it's helped me to grow, it's helped me learn to identify my emotions and struggles and think through my own thought processes. I hope that maybe for someone out there, it could help them do that as well. It's a little strange for me not to want to do that anymore. Writing this last story solidified to me that for the most part it was time to be done, and HDITA was more of a goodbye than anything else. But even with that, it feels strange not to be thinking of my next idea, thinking of how I am going to create characters and relationships and plot lines.

I think for me right now, I'm just excited to be myself. Maybe this vessel of writing was what I needed to get myself through the last two years. I wrote la princesa when I was at my absolute worst in life, and as I've grown and matured as a person, I like to think that my writing has. I no longer find myself in a place where it fills a huge void in my own life that I once needed.

I've grown a lot as a writer these few years (those who read my earlier works will understand), and I'm excited to one day come back to it, maybe in a different sphere. I love the idea now of writing a real book. It always terrified me before - I didn't know where I would start or if I would be horrible at it. But you all have given me the confidence that maybe at least one person would like it, and maybe that's enough of a reason to try. So thank you all for holding my hand and encouraging me. I hope that if nothing else, everyone remembers that a little bit of kindness on here or ao3 or anywhere on the internet costs nothing, and yet can go a long way.

It did for me.

But enough of my sappy rambling, please enjoy this last chapter of mine. I hope it brings you as much joy as it brought me when I was writing it. Love you all so so much!

Chapter 8 of How Do I Trust Again?

[emmie-writes-stuff]

So the new chapter is out and GOOD GOD do I have some thoughts and a lot of them don’t make a whole lot of sense but I can’t not talk about this chapter

Firstly, Kaiser looks adorable (never thought I’d say that about him outside of my head but here I am)

Secondly, holy hell my heart hurts

He didn’t deserve this, no child deserves this

The fact that he had to “go to work” and just steal

HE HAS NO SHOES his little feet have got to hurt, or they’ve completely calloused up from not wearing shoes, but even then (speaking from experience) it still hurts to walk on hot ground and rocks and other stuff on the street

Yknow, I understood him hating milk before (because milk is disgusting) but now I get it even more

What a stupid reason to get upset, imma kick this waste of space excuse for a father in the fucking face AND balls because ITS FUCKING MILK

Eat some damn fiber or somethin if you got constipation issues

Who let this absolute scum of the earth reproduce???

HES LITERALTL TWELVE YEARS OLD

All the other shit went down before he was even double digits

But dangerous situations create smart kids, and Kaiser was very smart to start saving his own money

I used to have my own stash in case I ever had to run away (long story, we’re not getting into my family issues in this post, but yeah)

At least he has shoes now, protect those feet plz, they’re what keep you upright and moving

Soooooooo are we gonna acknowledge that he treats the soccer ball the same way he’s currently treating Ness orrrrrrrr

But like, it’s nice that he has an outlet to channel his anger into that isn’t a person (at least for now smh)

It’s really interesting seeing how each of the characters came to play soccer

(Side note: but he throws the ball at a picture of a woman, could he maybe be imagining this woman as his mother?)

His mother also deserves a kick to the face if I have anything to say bout it

I have no words for this

Just, can I steal him? Please? I’ll give him a good life

Fuck the snitches, how dare they

Also, you can clearly see his ribs defined, and that hurts me

I love that he was willing to let go of everything

He was ready to start fresh with getting money, was cooperating with the police, until the soccer ball was threatened

Because that is his most valuable possession

The money doesn’t matter, but the ball is a symbol to him of something that won’t leave him or hurt him

It’s a very small sense of independence and stability in this very unstable and controlling environment

The ball is heavily implied to be the first thing he ever bought for himself, it’s what defined a key part in his life

Taking that away is like taking away his soul, his outlet, and comfort, and Kaiser just couldn’t stand for it

There’s so many more things I’m thinkin and I have way too many incoherent thoughts for tumblr, but these are the ones I was able to clear up and make sense of

This chapter hit very deep and while my past doesn’t involve much physical abuse and struggles to this level, it was hard not to empathize and relate my own experiences with abuse with the ones in this chapter

I don’t wanna get into shit, it’s not somethin I exactly wanna put out in the public, but there’s so much here that I could understand and relate to and it just made everything so much more difficult to read (in a good way I guess)

Just, GOD, why did I have to become a fan before this chapter came out???

Okay, that’s my ramble for this, bye before I start going on even more tangents

[candycassowary]

Project Malevolent: Animated

Project Malevolent: Animated is a passion project I've started with the goal of animating Malevolent scenes as if it were a Nickelodeon or Adult Swim mini-series

Everything I know about animation I've taught myself in the past few weeks- that's why everything is very simplistic. This isn't affiliated with the official publishing team or anything, only a personal project. I'll explain my plans moving forward with this below

Click read more for full post ->

I've always wanted to learn how to animate but never knew how to get started, and this is a perfect opportunity for me. I love this show so much and want to give back through a creative outlet. I need to mention that since I'm a student I can't guarantee a definite schedule or anything, and there's always a possibility that I'll have to abandon it. I hope to create something cool and maybe even animate a whole episode someday if I can even get there...

Here are a few examples of how I would want the finished product to look, when polished up

These are my two installments to this project so far, both made to test the artstyle I'm going for and toy with visual effects:

Dark World Animatic Benevolent Christmas Special Animatic

Animation is not my forte… I'm an illustrator and comic artist, so this is miles from what I'm used to and I'm pretty much flying by the seat of my pants. Still I'm having fun and learning so much

So that's where I am right now. Thank you for the support and positivity, I didn't expect so much :O There are plenty of artists here with waayyy more experience animating than me so if you have any constructive criticism please please please tell me, I always want to learn and improve

[akirathedramaqueen]

The Five Stages Of Grief: Verosika vs. Stolas

Alright, guys, it's time to play the complete denial card and ignore for a moment what we've just seen in the last short Viv dropped like a fucking nuke on our heads (seriously, this woman makes me swear more than a sailor).

Are we going to talk about something light? Ha-ha, you are looking at the angstiest person out here. Sorry. No relief for you.

But maybe some bits of analysis will do? Let's go.

The setup

Some time ago, I discussed how differently Stolas and Verosika react to their breakup with Blitz in response to one of my previous posts (it might be useful to read that to have the whole picture, but it's not crucial—here).

S2EP9, Apology Tour, 8:05

If we recap that reblog, I find that Stolas deals with his emotions much better and processes them in a more mature manner than Verosika does.

We could stop there, really, but I wanted to explore the situation from a different angle. Using the Kübler-Ross five stages of grief model, we can pull out more nuance from their actions and words.

They both went through a similar traumatic event—Blitzø hurt them in arguably one of the worst ways possible. The circumstances, Blitzø's intentions, and the outcomes are slightly different, but at their core, they are both left broken and deeply wounded.

Left: S2EP8, The Full Moon, 22:00 Right: S2EP9, Apology Tour, 18:03

So, what about their personalities makes their responses to trauma so contrasting?

Disclaimer about the model's credibility

This is probably me being overly pedantic, but I want to point out that this model is deemed to be popularized by the media, and professionals’ opinions are conflicted—some say it is accurate while others criticize it for its lack of flexibility or go as far as to say it has no application in real life. The studies are also inconclusive—there are papers both in favor of and against this model.

What am I trying to say here? This is a silly analysis about silly demons from a silly show, and if you do happen to unfortunately experience grief in any way (I am so sorry you have to go through this!), it is essentially experienced by all people differently. You should not feel bad if you skip stages or if their order is messed up.

Okay? <3 Okay. You’ve got this in your own way.

Tomorrow will be better than today.

Stolas: A Classic Way

One of the things I noted in my previous post is that Stolas immediately recognizes the pettiness of the party, and I praised his remarkable ability to see through the issues with such events.

The one day a year the spirits can rise amongst the living and it's spent celebrating mutual pettiness. S2EP9, Apology Tour, 6:55

And don’t get me wrong—his own way of dealing with problems is just drinking them away, and that’s not healthy. That’s why he actually belongs at this party.

But emotionally, Stolas is much more aware of what’s going on with him and the people around him. I think that despite his drinking problem, this awareness helps him process his own grief faster and find resolution—or at least an outlet—in just one night.

Let’s apply the five stages of grief model to him and see what’s going on.

Denial

You can see the denial seeping through during their morning conversation—there are moments when he clearly hopes Blitzø will suddenly listen to him and change his demeanor, despite Blitzø being consistent in his brashness and hostility.

Left: S2EP9, Apology Tour, 3:56 Right: S2EP9, Apology Tour, 4:23

Can you see the hope in his eyes? Can you see how ready he would be to brush off the whole shitshow happened between them just for Blitzø to take at least a bit of accountability or accept his feelings?

Additionally, although it doesn’t fit the term perfectly, we could stretch the concept a bit and say that the following lyrics below are somewhat denialish. Notice, by the way, that it’s not linear to the suggested model—you’ll see why later.

But I, I keep on waiting Waiting to want you less than I do And I do, oh, I do, yes I still do want you S2EP9, Apology Tour, 11:08

'Cause I am not a thief, but you were mine to earn S2EP9, Apology Tour, 11:42

He struggles to accept that the relationship has ended (we struggle too, baby owl, and we're not accepting it… but it gets worse before it gets better), and he still waits for Blitzø to return, maintaining a possessive feeling—“you were mine to earn.”

Anger

Stolas's anger is vastly different from Verosika's—I promise to elaborate on it later.

He uses his anger throughout the morning confrontation with Blitzø to protect himself from Blitzø's attacks and futile attempts to retain the status quo. His anger serves to assert that he is done with the transactional arrangement and Blitzø's behavior.

As shocking as this might seem, Blitzø, I don't think I'm in the mood to "do sex" with you. In fact, I don't think I'm even in the mood to do words with you! So, how about you respect that? S2EP9, Apology Tour, 0:57

[Stolas]: Get out. Right now! [Blitzø]: What?! [Stolas]: I'm tired of this! I'm uncomfortable how you're speaking to me now! S2EP9, Apology Tour, 2:24

And all of this happens just the night after that disastrous full moon meeting! Stolas is pissed off, and rightfully so. But he still gives Blitzø the chance to correct his behavior, explain, and apologize. He asks Blitzø to leave him in peace but stays to hear him out until it becomes clear that Blitzø is not going to relent or give in.

His anger is not used to destroy those he is angry with; rather, it is directed toward keeping himself whole—at least as much as possible.

Bargaining

The whole verse of All 2 U, where Stolas contemplates what went wrong and if there's something they could still do, represents him trying to bargain for a better future.

Maybe there's something here for us to glean? For you to teach and me to try and learn? S2EP9, Apology Tour, 11:32

Of course, this is also something very useful for when they come back together (not if!). Despite Blitzø being the focus in the Apology Tour episode, Stolas has a lot of work to do, too. And him realizing that is a positive step.

But for now, from the perspective we’re looking at, this is a clear sign of him trying to trade anything he can for their relationship to flourish.

Depression

Eventually, Stolas breaks down publicly. He can’t hold the mask on anymore; seeing Blitzø is unbearable, as it reminds him too much of everything that happened and everything that could’ve been.

You! Why are you here? I don't want you here, go home, please! Let me not feel so sad! S2EP9, Apology Tour, 15:50

And he manages to compose himself incredibly quickly…

S2EP9, Apology Tour, 16:07

It takes him just 17 seconds to fall into crying and calm himself. But there was more brewing beneath the surface—he just didn’t show it.

Calm yourself, young prince. You know excitement is unbecoming of a Goetia. S2EP1, The Circus, 00:20

Acceptance...?

Then there's the guy who received more hate than he (allegedly) deserved—Better Than Blitzo guy. He asks Stolas for a dance, and Stolas accepts. He seems to quite enjoy himself there, actually… maybe even a tad too much (arguably).

Well, I just wanted to see if... Maybe... I dunno... You'd wanna... Dance? S2EP9, Apology Tour, 16:16

S2EP9, Apology Tour, 19:08

S2EP9, Apology Tour, 20:08

Did he move on? Did he get over Blitzø? We don’t know. I don’t think so. But that dance was certainly an outlet. A relief he was ready to accept. He was ready not to dwell on negative emotions and allow himself to feel something good for a change.

Verosika: A scorched earth way

Now, let’s see how Verosika is doing after all these years post-breakup. Surely she can’t care less about Blitzø now, right?

Anger

Right… No petty feelings at all.

S1EP3, Spring Break, 8:13

There's still resentment...

A selfish imp in the sheets And just as bad in the streets A reckless, heartbreaking freak! S1EP7, Ozzie's, 11:54

Anger… to the murderous degree, actually…

Fuck Blitzo in the fucking ass! S2EP9, Apology Tour, 8:14

Disrespect...

That cock-sucking motherfucker! S2EP9, Apology Tour, 9:36

Remember when I said their anger is different?

She uses hers to fuel her determination to destroy Blitzø’s reputation. She uses her fame and all her resources to humiliate him.

She never moved past anger. Never really processed it.

But wait…

Acceptance?!

S2EP9, Apology Tour, 18:55

All it took was just one long-overdue genuine talk. The moment she saw Blitzø's remorse and let her feelings out, she immediately warmed up, stopped using his dead name, and even gave advice—it’s debatable whether it was the best one, but I believe she meant well for both Blitzø and Stolas.

Hold it, Blitzø. Y’know, if you wanna change, it just starts with saying: “Good for him, hope he gets laid.” S2EP9, Apology Tour, 19:18

You know, I feel there’s a good chance that the next anti-Blitzo party might not ever happen again.

Because she leaped through all the stages in one night, and, maybe not at that exact moment, but she is on the path to acceptance. Finally letting it go.

Baby, I'm not over it, but I'm over you.

Could've saved many years of simmering in rage and destructing herself over Blitzø though.

Conclusions

Oh shit, now I need to somehow connect all the dots, don’t I?

Well... *chuckles nervously* I guess I gotta put on my nerd glasses and pretend I knew what I was doing here and not just threw shit at the wall and saw what stuck.

What I really wanted to say is that Stolas is much more self-aware and was able to work through all his feelings and process them in one day. He went through the complete journey and made immense progress. We don’t know how it will go further, but from what we’ve seen, his emotional intelligence helps him, if not to avoid problematic behaviors like binge-drinking, then at least not to burn bridges behind him, leaving space for understanding, forgiveness, and acceptance.

It’s not to say that Verosika’s way of doing things was wrong because she was angry and skipped through some stages. It was wrong because she made her entire personality revolve around it, turning bringing Blitzø down in any way possible into her ultimate life goal. It was wrong because she never processed it.

And it shows why, even after the break-up, #stolitz can still work, given that Blitzø is open about how he feels and Stolas is open to listening to it.

AGAIN! There’s no right way to process grief. But there should be a priority to heal and accept instead of doubling down and ruining yourself and everything you cared for.

(I am watching you, Blitzø hater. Don’t you dare to shit on my poor lizard. He has his own heap of issues and has had enough after that fucking penguin slur short. So don’t. >:()

[live-laugh-lenney]

What about George when his girl is insecure?

oh, he'd be the sweetest. you cannot tell me otherwise. he's a big old softy when it comes to her feeling insecure...

"oi, you. why are you hiding in here?"

yn tears her attention away from her phone and she directs her eyes over to the bedroom door, the quietness of the room being broken by her boyfriend's hushed voice. his head being all she could see as he peered into his bedroom, with the door being kept ajar so she could still hear the commotion of arthur's housewarming party from down the hallway, loud music and heavy chatter bouncing off the walls.

with a spare room going at george's, with arthur hill and chris taking the other two, they had offered it out to 'mister television' and it was an offer he took kindly. immediately making the flat his own from the moment he had started moving in.

"i just needed a bit of peace," yn replies softly, "everything okay?"

george nods softly and steps into the room, a bottle of peroni in his hand and, as he sat down beside her, she could smell the booze on his breath; intoxicating to her because there was something about drunk george that she couldn't get enough of. the way his eyes would darken after each beer, the way his lips got wetter and wetter, the way his hands would wander her body... it was something special and she longed for a night out where the two of them could let loose.

except, this night, she just wasn't feeling it.

she just wasn't feeling herself.

her relationship with george had been common knowledge for over a year now, his followers welcoming her in with open arms and the sweetest of messages, and she thought she'd gotten lucky in barely coming across any hate and messages that were simply posted out of pure jealousy and rage... until that morning, when she was sat at the kitchen island in george's flat, scrolling through her twitter and her instagram on her laptop and spooning porridge into her mouth, taking advantage of the quiet flat before any of the boys had woken up.

and, for some reason, the majority of her 'recommended' tweets were about her. the top comments showing on her most recent instagram post were hateful towards the way she looked. the most retweeted and the most liked comments were about how george should be with someone else because she was boring and holding him back from his career.

'anyone else feeling bored of her now? george needs someone better'

'george isn't so active on here anymore... we haven't had a video from him for months. single him was so much better'

'him and gkbarry were my endgame. i hate how yn came into his life and ruined the dream'

'she's so ugly... why her?'

she knew that reading one bad tweet would drown out the majority of the nicer comments but those comments were hard to ignore. if they were said out of spite, and if they were said to hurt her, then they were achieving exactly that... and it was silly because they were from online outlets.

"is that really the reason?"

"what?"

"that you needed some peace. baby, you've been off with me all day," george states, his bottle of beer being placed on the bedside table next to his side of the bed, freeing both hands so he could hold hers tightly, "if something is bothering you, you can tell me."

"i know," she smiles softly and he leaves the space beside her and kneels down in front of her, resting his arms on her thighs and her hands being kept in his tight hold, "i know i can."

"then talk to me."

she lifts her head from her lap and she can feel her chin wobbling as soon as she made eye contact with his eyes, concern and confusion flooding his orbs as he sees her demeanour drop from her usual self. the bubbly personality having gone missing that day. no jokes being shared, she didn't tease arthur for something he'd said, chris couldn't even make her laugh and she didn't break into song with arthur hill when she saw him.

"what's happened?"

"i just," she huffs out a heavy and shaky breath, her head rolling back and she looks up to the ceiling, "people are so mean online, george."

"i thought we spoke about not going looking for those kinds of tweets and messages," he reminds her, his thumb rubbing over her knuckles in a soothing manner, "there's no point getting sucked in to the hate and the negative tones on social media. blacklist the words."

"but i didn't go looking," she states, "they were just there. right when i opened twitter this morning. on my instagram. people were saying you could do better than me. that i'm ugly. that i'm stopping you from doing your job. it just made me feel bad. insecure, almost. like, i know you can have anyone you like. just look at you."

he tuts and shakes his head, a displeasing look on his features and he squeezes her hands in hopes she would look at him in the eye. which she did. in a manner that was slow and cautious because she knew she was being silly, dealing dramatically with the situation, yet she just couldn't help it. she had feelings and when they got too much, she just needed a relief in letting them out before she felt better.

"george-"

"you have nothing to be insecure about, alright? i love you," he says with the cheesiest grin on his lips, "i love you. always. everything that i do, it's done so that i can spoil you and take you away with me and treat you so well. not them."

"but-"

"no," he interrupts her and stops her from continuing, bringing up a finger to hold against her lips, "you're gorgeous. you're beautiful. you are my favourite person in the entire world, okay? yeah, they may have gotten me into this whole crazy dream of mine but, i get to live that dream with you."

her heart triples in size, thumping hard in her chest, and her lips curve into a smile against his finger.

"i'm so lucky to have you, baby. my number one fan, my number one tiktok commenter, my number one."

"that was cheesy," she murmurs and he rolls his eyes, standing to his feet and holding his hands out, "you know i'm going to tell them you just said that."

"don't," he warns her, pulling her to her feet and bringing her to his chest, her cheek resting against the t-shirt on his upper body and his lips pressing against her forehead, "you ready to come back out? the others have been asking for you."

she nods and looks up at him, standing on her tiptoes and placing a kiss to his lips.

"i love you too, by the way."

short and sweet for our georgey boy there. thank you for sending this in! i do love a bit of fluffy and boyfriend-y george fics - he just screams simp for his girlfriend, you can't tell me otherwise. xx

[berryhobii]

Baby Girl: Show Out (ksj x reader)

Pairing: SugarDaddy!Kim Seokjin x SugarBaby!Brat!Reader

Word Count: 2.7K+

Warnings: established relationship(reader and Seokjin are technically together), smut (18+ but I don’t control what you consume, oral(m and f receiving), orgasms(f receiving), exhibitionism, getting caught but not caring, mentions of ruining furniture from s*x😝, reader’s definitely a bitch in this but I love it, Seokjin’s also violating so many company policies but remember this is fiction.

A/N: Hi hi! Here’s another one shot for my BabyGirl couple. I feel like I don’t read enough fics where reader is a mondo bitch so here’s my contribution🫣reader is in fact dark skinned in this and their style is Y2K and AaliyahCore if you didn’t know already. It’s just something about bad bitches in tiny skirts that I absolutely love😭anyway, please enjoy and stay safe🩵🩵

~

Blowing a bubble with your fruity flavored gum and then popping it, you strutted down the clean and spacious hallways, only the thought of that new Sanrio pop up that just opened downtown on your mind. You had seen an Instagram post about it earlier and your eyes could have bursted with rainbows and glitter. A Cinnamoroll plush in a bear costume? Yes! You needed it!

The only problem was you had spent the last of your allowance on a new Telfar purse and every color of those Bailey Bow UGG boots. Why exactly did you need every color? Obviously because the company made every color, duh. Why make multiple colors if they didn’t want people buying all of them? It was a smart business tactic that you’d fall for every time.

With those packages on the way and that Cinnamoroll calling your name, it was time for you to do what you do best.

Flutter your lashes and sweet talk your sugar daddy into giving you his credit card.

And deepthroating. You were good at that too. Maybe you could do both.

As your bright red MoonBoots(gotta get into the holiday spirit!) carried you down the hallways, you could feel the loathing stares and hear the gossiping whispers of each person you passed in the halls.

Unlike most sugar daddies and sugar babies, you and Seokjin didn’t hide your relationship at all. Everyone knew who you were and what your relationship entailed. Initially, Seokjin kept you under wraps; only coming to see you in the dead of night, renting out places for your dates so that no one would see you together. Sometimes, he’d make you wear masks and sunglasses when you’d enter and exit his condo. It was going pretty well.

However, after an employee at a restaurant he brought you to secretly snapped a photo of the both of you and posted it online, the secret could no longer be hidden. So after suing that employee and addressing multiple news outlets out his secret relationship, you were allowed to parade around freely. With the news of South Korea’s biggest bachelor having a sugar baby, you had to be more careful in public. Seokjin assigned you a driver and he tried to get you a security guard but you insisted that would pull more attention to you. He wasn’t sure but after giving him a blowjob and signing up for self defense classes, he relented.

Since you didn’t have to hide yourself anymore, you waltzed into Seokjin’s office like you owned it. Always dressed loudly and fashionably, a designer bag swinging on your arm and Tiffany studs in your ears(never less than 18 carats), you were the head bitch. New York would be so proud of you!

And every jealous woman’s stare only stroked your ego further.

You reached the desk of Seokjin’s personal secretary. While you didn’t have to stop to talk to her, you got a kick out of pissing her off. No one knew except you and Seokjin but he told you that Rina had confessed her feelings to him a little bit after you two had initially started your relationship. He had politely rejected her and there was no awkwardness from his side. He still treated her kindly and relied on her as his secretary.

Then the news of you came to the light and all of those bitter feelings of rejection evolved into pure anger and transferred right to you.

She lifted her eyes from her computer, face immediately dropping at the sight of your wide smile.

“Good afternoon, Rina. How are you today?”

Rolling her eyes, she let out a frustrated sigh before gritting out a, “fine.” She wanted nothing more but to tell you to get the hell out of her face but everyone knew you had Seokjin wrapped around your finger. Any disrespect towards you was practically asking to get fired. And Rina liked this job and it’s benefits too much to let you ruin it.

And you knew that.

“Do you like my new purse?” You held up the bag in her face. “It’s from the new Marc Jacobs collection.”

Her lips formed a sneer, eyebrow twitching slightly. “Is it? I couldn’t tell.”

“Yeah. It’s probably not in your price range so I get it.” You shot back with a bitchy smirk. Smoke could have came out of her ears from how red her face became. “Anyway, is Seokjin in?”

Swallowing down the rising insult in her throat, she gritted out, “he’s busy right now.”

Checking your nails, totally ignoring what she just said. “Alright then I’ll go in. Oh do me a favor?”

She watched you take the gum out of your mouth and stick it right on the pad of sticky notes on her desk. You shot her a quick wink before walking by her, leaving her jaw dropped and blood boiling.

Opening the door, you strutted inside the spacious room. You spotted the new leather couches off to the right. Those were your idea; leather was easier to clean. You and Seokjin absolutely destroyed those fabric sofas he had with your antics. Did furniture warranty’s cover acts of kinky sex that would make a nun faint? They should.

That aside, your focus went to the objective of this visit.

Posture slightly hunched and deft fingers typing over his keyboard, Seokjin was absorbed in whatever work was in front of him. At the sound of the door opening and closing, he lifted his gaze. His eyes immediately brightened at the sight of you, thick lips stretching across beautiful straight teeth. You reciprocated his cheesy grin, happily skipping over to his desk with a newfound pep in your step. Placing your purse on the corner of the desk, you leaned both of your palms on the wood.

He pushed down the screen of his laptop, his spine straightening as his mood immediately improved. “Baby girl. What a surprise.” He couldn’t stop himself from taking a glance at your cleavage that was on display in the red bra you wore, a black mesh long sleeved distressed shirt under it which just barely helped hide your pebbled nipples. He always thought you looked cute but this look was just on the edge of sexy. As if the black mini skirt and garter belt wasn’t enough, the red choker around your throat made him go crazy.

His stare didn’t go unnoticed by you.

“Am I interrupting anything?” If you were, you didn’t really care but you weren’t anything if not a polite baby girl.

“Of course not. I was just sending a few emails. I was about to take a break anyway.” He moved his chair back a little, patting a hand on his lap. You smiled, rounding his desk to take your rightful place on his lap.

He wrapped his arms around you, leaning in nose at your shoulder and press a few kisses there.

“You look beautiful today.”

You cupped his cheek to lift his head, rubbing your nose against his. “Thank you. So do you.” Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pulled him into a hot and lip gloss sticky kiss. He sighed contentedly against your mouth, his fingers squeezing at your hip and thighs. Taking the initiative, you tilted his head back to kiss him deeper and to play for dominance just a little bit.

Seokjin smirked into the lip lock. He’d never admit it but he loved when you took control. You were submissive through and through—his good girl. However you had your few moments where you could get a little bratty, a little brave and he couldn’t deny the small thrill it sent through him. It sparked his own inner dom and made him want to gently push you back into that submissive state.

Then again, this was pretty hot too.

He let you kiss him how you wanted for a little bit, just relaxing and letting himself melt into you and your affection.

After a little making out, you parted from him, giggling at his slightly flushed cheeks and pouty lips. Your thumb swiped over his spit slicked bottom lip.

“I’ve missed you.”

“Mhmm. How much do you need?”

Welp, guess that deepthroating was off the table.

Dramatically gasping, you held a hand to your chest in faux shock. “How dare you? I came here to have an engaging conversation with you.”

He rolled his eyes, not believing you for a second. While you two have been together for a while and have shared many intimate and romantic times together, the sugar daddy/baby dynamic still remained at the base of all of that. You visited him at work every often, normally for lunch dates or to show him a new outfit but you only had that bounce in your step when you came to ask for something.

He also had never seen that purse before which probably meant you had spent your allowance.

Ugh. You were spoiled and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Fine then. Start the conversation.”

You opened your mouth but no words came out.

Damn it. He got you.

Slumping in defeat, you sighed, jutting out your bottom lip. “Okay fine. I spent my allowance and I want to go to the Sanrio pop up downtown.”

His grin was as endearing as it was heart fluttering. Either way, it was dangerous for your heart. Why did he have to be so damn handsome? How could you charm the pants off a man that had you like putty in his hands just from a simple smile?

“What if I told you I was already planning on taking you there tomorrow?”

Your smile was so wide you could have sponsored Colgate. A squeal of glee came from your throat, your arms yanking him into a hug as you bounced on his lap.

He laughed at your reaction, returning the embrace with the arm that was behind your back.

“Really?! Oh my goodness!” You pressed multiple pecks across his cheeks and nose, covering every inch of his face in your gloss.

“But while you’re here, why don’t we have lunch together? There’s a nice buffet that just opened not too far from here. I think I have a meeting in a little while but we can go when I’m done.”

“That sounds amazing.” You hummed, sweetly kissing his lips again.

Hands began feeling, kisses began getting a little more desperate, and eventually, your panties were soaked.

What could you say? Money made you horny. Quoting the wise words of your president Yung Miami and her vice president JT: “don’t nothing but a bag make this pussy talk.” Ah, you should get that framed and hung on your wall.

Your acrylics scratched at the nape of his neck, your tongues swirling around each others in a battle for dominance. He won, of course but only because you let him.

You pulled away, tugging on his bottom lip with your teeth and biting just a little before releasing it.

“What do you say?” He started for you, eyes hypnotic and luscious lips slightly parted. You wanted to kiss all the air out of his lungs.

That seductive glint in your eye paired with that coy smirk…..

“Thank you, daddy.”

You drove him fucking insane.

Boisterous giggles came from your mouth as he hauled you onto his desk before sitting back down in his chair. You instinctively spread your legs for him, giving him a front row seat to your pussy lips.

He groaned, erection beginning to strain against his dress pants.

“No panties? You bad girl.” His thumb ran across your folds, smearing your wetness to your clit. “What if someone would have seen?”

You bit your lip. “I might have flashed a man downstairs….”

That confession warranted a light slap to your clit making you jump.

Seokjin’s eyes were dark and his smirk was smug, cocky almost because he knew that only he could touch you.

“Naughty girl. Will daddy need to punish you? Flashing what’s mine to people.” He scolded with a tut, both thumbs moving to spread your puffy lips apart so he could see your winking hole.

You whined, wiggling your bottom. “I’m sorry, daddy. It was an accident. I’m a good girl, I swear.”

His hot breath blew over your clit, tongue flicking out to tease it.

“That’s right. Your daddy’s good girl.”

The licks to your clit were calculated and firm, your head falling back as you were finally getting some much needed relief. You hadn’t seen Seokjin for 3 days and the strict No Touching rule he gave you meant that your pussy was feeling a little neglected.

But now he was about to give you exactly what you needed.

When his plush lips wrapped around your precious little clit, your back arched and you let a whiny moan out into the air. That same sinfully flexible tongue trailed down to your gushing hole, digging further to all the splits he could reach. Your arms couldn’t hold you anymore, your back meeting his desk and your head hanging over the side.

Your viscous arousal tasted so god damn good on his tongue. He couldn’t control his own moans as his mouth worked you higher and higher.

And you were making the prettiest noises; your gasps for air and whiny squeaks whenever he’d give you a deep suck to your clit. They just made him want to absolutely devour you, just to pull more of those delightful sounds from you. His arms wrapped around your thighs to pull you closer, loud slurps and licks filling the space next to your moans.

He felt your hand loop through his hair, letting you take over a little and chase your high. Not that he needed any help getting you there, you always got lost in pleasure, desperate to climb that mountain and tumble off of it.

Seokjin was so absorbed in your juicy cunt that he didn’t even hear the knock on his office door.

Through your hazy and half lidded eyes, you noticed the door open, a familiar face peeking inside.

Rina.

“Sir, are you-“

Her body froze at the sight of you laid out across the rich mahogany desk, her boss’s face buried between your legs. She knew you two weren’t very secretive about what went down. Hell, even she wasn’t dense enough to think you two didn’t get frisky in multiple parts of this office. The main gossip during lunchtime was about people hearing you and Seokjin having sex in places like bathrooms, private conference rooms, even the break room that one time. She didn’t care about it considering she didn’t like you very much and hated giving you the satisfaction that you irked her soul.

Actually catching you two in the act was not in her Bingo card this year.

It was in yours though.

Smirking, you let out a pornographic moan.

“Oh my god, daddy! You’re gonna make me cum!”

Rina watched stunned, your eyes locked with hers in a display of dominance and arrogance that could only come from someone like you.

Pampered. Pretty. And a spoiled bitch.

You loved your life.

Seokjin hummed, lips wrapping around your clit again. “Cum in my mouth, baby girl.”

“Yes daddy!” Your back arched as the waves came crashing down on you, the hand tangled in his air keeping him in place against your clit. He stayed where you wanted him, delivering little kitten licks to your bud to help you ride it out. He greedily slurped up every sticky drip of wetness you had, more pouring from your hole.

When you released him, he sat up, your juices dripping down his chin and his kissable lips cherry red from all their hard work.

Your chest rose and fell with deep breaths as you lifted yourself from his desk. Grabbing his chin with one hand, you bent down to capture his lips in a kiss.

“Thank you daddy.” You whispered against his pout. “Why don’t I repay the favor?”

“Get on your knees, baby girl.”

“Yes daddy. I also think Rina wants to talk to you.”

Slipping down from his desk, your knees hit the floor and your hands went for his belt.

That’s when Seokjin finally took notice of his secretary. Running a hand through his messy hair, he acknowledged her. “Yes Rina?”

As if his call of her name pressed the play button on her universal remote, she broke from her state of shock.

“I-I….uh….you-your m-meeting is in 10 minutes.” She stammered out.

Nodding, he looked down at you who had already began slobbering all over his cock, your hand pumping at his shaft.

“Heard that baby girl? 10 minutes.”

“That’s all I need.”

[blogstandbygo]

HEY EVERYONE, ATLIN MERRICK IS AN AMAZING PERSON!!!

Once upon a time, when I was a baby fanfic writer, I wrote a crappy story. Then I got an idea for a slightly better story and wrote that. Then I had the AUDACITY to send it to one of the biggest Sherlock fanfic authors out there.

It was impossible to be in the Sherlock fandom at that time, have a knowledge of fic, and not hear about @atlinmerrick. She wrote the funniest, sweetest, horniest, sweary, and adorable fics out there. And there were a lot (57 at last count… coincidence? I think not), tens or hundreds of thousands of words long. She alone was responsible for most headcanons floating around out there, still floating today. Atlin was and is the definition of BNF (big name fan).

And despite my AUDACITY, this fic writer, who was incredibly busy with her own writing, and work, and master’s degree, and, y’know, life, RESPONDED. She admitted that she didn’t have time to read the whole thing, but read the first and last chapter, and gave me such encouragement that I was inspired to continue.

(I later wrote another fic, and gifted it to Atlin. She publicly threw glitter at it, and it’s still one of my highest kudos’ed fics.)

Fast forward ten years, and I did keep writing (resolutely for Sherlock, so there). Started dabbling my toes in not-Sherlock writing as well. So when I saw a post calling for submissions for a new anthology from Atlin’s publishing company, I thought, WHY NOT. I’d never submitted anything before. What could I lose? The worst is that she’d say no.

And still she encouraged me. Offered advice. Suggested ways to make it better. And then she ACCEPTED the dang thing.

She sent me a symbolic dollar to celebrate my first publication. But she’s given me a lot more than a dollar – she encouraged a middle-aged baby fanfic writer that she was doing good writing, and to keep going. And that led to a creative outlet and more new friends than I could have imagined, all those years ago.

Thank you, Atlin. For the dollar. For the encouragement. For being who you are. Thank you for everything.

(Also, to all the other writers out there: Keep writing. Be audacious. Throw glitter.)

[honeesucker]

Prelude -

Pairing: ProHero!DynaMight | Katsuki Bakugo x Puppygirl!Reader

Word count:  2,263

Series Content Warnings: Little bit of a slow start... Graphic Depictions of Past Abuse & Trauma Response | Profuse Usage of Pet Names / All-around Softness | Bakugo Experienced Work-Related Trauma (causing near deafness, being put on leave from the agency, PTSD) | Eventual smut™ (will be tagged in individual chapters - to include but not limited to KiriBaku, HybridxHybrid, Hybrid heat trope, sex toy usage).

*Not Proofread.

Next Part

Katsuki Bakugo wasn’t a fundamentally nervous person. Sure, even as a Pro Hero in the public spotlight under constant scrutiny and dissection by media outlets and fans alike he experienced a normal amount of anxious awareness, but he wasn’t nervous – not like he is now, with his right leg jumping up and down rapidly, rubber-bottom boot creating a soft squeak that filled up the sterile room of the Musutafu Hero Recuperation Facility. It had been just over a month since the incident that gave him nightmares and left him with such severe hearing damage that he was currently unable to perform even basic hero duties for his agency – which is why he is sat where he is now, waiting. Hoping the next steps are what could get him back out into the city on normal duty than having his medical leave extended. 

He was losing his mind being left to himself and his thoughts each day, being told by doctors he needed to be still, and take is easy, and he was only losing his patience each subsequent doctor’s appointment that left him no closer to returning to Pro Hero work. 

“Tch,” the blonde ground his teeth as the indignant noise stuck in his throat; he swallowed it down with a harsh gulp. His ears were ringing when the two doctors walked in, eyes unfocused as the room and people in front of him blurred in and out of clarity, everything around him sounded like it was underwater, and he hated it.  

“Mr. Bakugo,” the doctor continued, Katsuki refocusing his attention on the man’s words, annoyed and thinking that Mr. Bakugo is my old man, not me... “we have some support specialists working with the latest auditory data set we took from you and they are getting closer to having a solution to get your hearing back to where it was before, and keep it there – even possibly making it better if all goes to plan.” 

“In the meantime, it is recommended you follow the strict guidelines for allowing your body to heal itself naturally,” the other spoke. “You need to make sure you’re not exceeding the maximum limit for minimal exertion we’ve placed on your physical activity, so you have a better chance of getting back to your pre-incident status.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Katsuki sighed out, tired of hearing this same speech each visit. “Don’t overdo it, give my damn body time to heal – I got it.” The two doctors observed Katsuki with cautious eyes, but simply nodded their acceptance of his understanding. It was as good as it was going to get with him. 

“Another suggestion,” one of the two added. “We have provided you with an email detailing a program we’d like you to consider – your colleague Red Riot actually participates and could be a good resource for you if you have any questions about it.” 

“Please take a look when you have a moment and consider this a strong suggestion for helping you progress further in your treatment,” Katsuki eyed the two, irritated at the vagueness of the conversation, but swallowed down his disagreement and simply nodded. 

“Yeah sure,” his chair slid back with a jarring scrape as he stood, moving toward the door to leave, “I’ll read your damn email, but I want progress updates from the support nerds.” He didn’t wait to hear their reply as he pushed through the door and hurried down the hall. He hated hospitals, hated the itch of memory in the back of his mind at the sterilized smell that gave him goosebumps and had him picking up the pace to rush out the side exit before heading to the sidewalk to wait for his friend to come get him after he shot him a text that he was all wrapped up. Another annoying outcome from the accident and the resulting toll on his body – he couldn’t drive himself as it was deemed too unsafe for him.  

Bullshit. 

“Hey Bakubro!” Katsuki’s eyes snapped toward the boisterous voice, seeing his red-headed friend waving his arm out the passenger window of his car. Katsuki ripped the door open and sunk into the passenger seat, Kirishima avoided asking how this appointment went the second he saw Katsuki’s demeanor. The two men drove in silence on the way to Katsuki’s apartment when the silence was cut. 

“Doctors mentioned an email they sent me about this program,” Katsuki tested the water, being unsure what the program his doctors suggested he partake in he wasn’t sure if it was good to bring up with Kirishima at this moment. “They mentioned you’ve taken part in it before... Was curious what it’s all about,” Katsuki wouldn’t add the unspoken because I trust your opinion, but he knew Kirishima knew him and his nuances better than anyone since they’ve been side by side since UA. 

“Program...?” Kirishima wracked his brain for a few minutes until it clicked.  

The Hybrid Rehabilitation Foster Program.  

A program that matches people with hybrids who have been rescued from inhumane circumstances with a person who needs support in their healing journey, and who is believed will benefit from focusing more on rehabilitating another which has been shown to have equally beneficial results with the healing person themselves. Kirishima had first taken part in the program after he was put on medical leave due to a villain fight that nearly left him dead – his body and his mind took almost a full year to heal, and he nearly gave up entirely. On Pro Hero work, on himself... on life. His doctors had mentioned the program and Kirishima wasn’t sure at first – how would he be able to provide a good home to someone who needed stability and support when he could barely pull himself out of bed? He got matched with a wolf hybrid, TetsuTetsu, who had been rescued from an underground fighting ring, having to kill other hybrids just to be able to get locked in a cage alive for another day. TetsuTetsu was surprisingly positive and open for someone who had gone through what he did, but he still had issues – Kirishima slowly helped break him of his more undesirable reactivity and in return TetsuTetsu gave Kirishima a reason to get up every day, make food, go for walks... talk about things that weighed on him, and before he knew it, he was making strides rebuilding his strength with his new training partner. Kirishima still had TetsuTetsu living with him, and Katsuki had met him several times now, but Kirishima never divulged how their relationship came to be – just alluded to him adopting a hybrid in need. 

“Yeah! If it’s the one I’m thinking about it’s a pretty great program,” Kirishima finally spoke. “It’s a rehabilitation program for hybrids who were rescued from bad situations. They place them with a person who they feel would benefit from having something to care for while working on their own journey too.” 

“Tch,” Katsuki snorted out, “sounds like a pain in the ass waste of time.” 

“It’s how I adopted TetsuTetsu,” Kirishima stated out loud for the first time to his friend. Katsuki noted the stiff body language from his friend, knuckles white as they gripped the steering wheel. “When I was out on leave for that year after...” Kirishima couldn’t finish the thought, the memory still a sore spot. “I was out on leave, and it got bad dude. I really came close to just giving up.” Katsuki had seen his friend in a lot of lights, weak and strong – but Kirishima never revealed what happened after that incident that left him injured when he was on leave for that year. Never thought for a second his life came so close to not having that shitty red hair and sharky smile in it, never thought he’d ever have that brotherhood bond ripped from him. Katsuki swallowed hard, the lump in his throat the size of a boulder.  

“That bad, huh?” Kirishima just flashed a half-smile, watching his friend shift uncomfortably in the seat. 

“Yeah,” Kirishima sighed, “it got pretty bad. I was against the idea at first, not thinking I could take care of someone when I couldn’t do it myself but it’s amazing how your mind overrides itself to keep going for someone else... and having TetsuTetsu around really helped me get back on track to be back where I am now.” 

Katsuki had been chewing on the inside of his cheek, eyes narrowed into a concentrated death stare before he noticed that they were parked in front of his apartment building. “I do like that annoying rockhead,” Katsuki finally said. Kirishima just laughed and gave a gentle punch to his friend’s shoulder. 

“Just think about it dude,” Kirishima smiled, seeing the cogs turning in Bakugo’s head. “They provide a link to the rescue sight so you can see some of the hybrids they have in their facility right now – and look into next steps if you end up going that route...” Bakugo had stepped out of the car listening to his friends, and before shutting the door with a quick Later, dude Kirishima added - “it’s worth it Bakugo.” 

Slam. 

Kirishima just laughed, watching Bakugo enter his building before pulling away to head back home. Intending to text Bakugo later to see where his head is at and see if he wants to talk more in depth about the program. 

Bakugo made his way up to his apartment – opening the door and stepping into the genkan to slip out of his boots and into his bright crimson and black Red Riot house slippers – a joke gift from his friend but functional enough that Bakugo didn’t mind replacing his old ones with them.  He’d never outwardly admit it but he had a love for sentimentality even when it made him uncomfortable, and Kirishima always had such a shit eating grin on his face when he came over to Bakugo’s house and saw them still being used. 

Bakugo’s apartment was wide open, a minimalistic space with deep chocolate colored wood laminate flooring and a traditional shoji style wall, some actual shoji, and some just styled in a more traditional way with wallpaper and wood accents. The whole living room wall facing out toward Musutafu was made up of large windows that lead to a fairly decently sized balcony with a bonfire and patio set, and down a short hallway was the spare room that currently housed his office where he could complete some more of the menial work from home, and a pull-out couch for guests. His bedroom was an equally large, open space but housed a King-sized bed with plush comforters and pillows, a wall dedicated to All Might memorabilia he collected since he was a child and was connected to a luxury bathroom with a deep tub and natural rock wall shower that doubled as a steam room. 

Bakugo took his time getting showered, changed into loungewear and set to work through some of his most recent light work assignments, and finally his emails where one caught his eye immediately. 

Musutafu Hybrid Rehabilitation Foster Program, LLC <info@MHRFP.jp.com> 

To: Bakugo, Katsuki <explosionmurdergod@endeavoragency.jp.com> 

Tue, Nov 8 at 10:26 AM 

Hello Katsuki Bakugo, 

Congratulations! You have been extended a conditional offer of consideration for adoption as a part of the Hybrid Rehabilitation Program per a request from your medical team at the Musutafu Hero Recuperation Facility. Please note that this adoption offer is contingent upon the completion of the necessary online paperwork and tasks, as well as your attendance to the required hybrid informational seminars prior to the adoption process. Additionally, your offer may be contingent on screening results (e.g., background check, reference check), as applicable for the adoption. 

In advance of you coming to the facility, please follow the link below to complete required paperwork and tasks as stated above. You will also be redirected to our facilities availability calendar to choose a day to come in and tour the facility, speak with staff and begin the introduction process at your convenience. 

Thank you for your cooperation. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact the facility and ask to speak to the Managing Director.   

Best regards, 

The M.H.R.F.P. Team 

Bakugo stared at his computer screen for the longest time before deciding to click on the hyperlink that led him to the rescue facilities website. He was on autopilot as he filled out all of the personal information, required questions (both information-gathering and personal) and even wrote in his concerns in a concise manner in a provided box for additional comments before hitting submit and staring as the screen buffered with a loading wheel until it finally read ‘Thank you! A member of our staff will be contacting you shortly to confirm your appointment date!’ He didn’t know why he easily accepted this opportunity despite his growing hesitation, again unsure that he could or should be seeking to take care of something else when he could barely manage to care about himself beyond pushing himself into getting back to his normal Hero work... but a nagging feeling at the back of his mind told him this was something worth checking out. 

“Hell, if shitty Broomhead can do this program then so can I,” he finally said, shutting his laptop and heading toward his bedroom to sleep.  

Underneath the plush covers, in the darkness of his room, Bakugo drifted off into a dream of what awaited him upon meeting a hybrid. 

[toddxhavez]

Love In The Dark

Pairing(s): Jenna Ortega x reader, mentions of Victoria Pedretti x reader

Summary: A nice night out at a movie premiere doesn’t go as planned for Jenna when she runs into her ex-girlfriend there.

Warning(s): Female reader, angst, mentions of drinking and past drug use, that’s all I think but feel free to correct me!

Word count: 1.7k

A/N: This takes place sometime in the future, reader is the same age as Jenna in this story which is 29. I’ll probably give more background on their relationship in part two but the song I had in mind for the reader in this story is Love In The Dark by Adele you’ll know what I mean after you read it. Sorry for disappearing but I was having trouble feeling confident and comfortable about my writing! Not proofread there might be some mistakes. (Gif is not mine, the credits belong to the user right below it!)

The biggest problem with working as an actress in Hollywood definitely had to do with the public, when they loved you they loved you sure but climbing the ladder of popularity came with consequences, all it takes is one interaction taken out of context to make them angry.

The interaction in question took place at a movie premiere. Jenna’s agent Owen received her formal invitation and asked her if she’d been interested in attending, she agreed since it was for a horror film.

If only she said no, she wishes she said no.

When Jenna arrived to walk on the red carpet, a staple feature that came with just about every movie premiere, she’d gotten there only minutes before you did. One of the many purposes of a movie premiere is to generate excitement and raise awareness about the film but right now one of the only things the media outlets are focusing on about last week was Jenna’s interaction with you, her ex-girlfriend of five years.

You’d think growing up as an actress your entire life would mean that it’s easy to walk the red carpet, Jenna wants to say that she’s used to it but she’s not.

Thankfully nobody would be able to tell the difference.

She takes a deep breathe and tries to push away that this walk in particular is turning into another stinging reminder that you’d always been here with her the times she’s felt truly at ease and comfortable, slowly but surely these resurfacing thoughts of you would fade away right?

Jenna continues walking past the numerous shouts and flashing lights, offering them a kind smile and occasionally stopping where one of the coordinators of the red carpet asks her to. There’s one photographer in particular that has a camera that could light up a whole town on his own that momentarily blinds her, while the coordinator reprimands the man she takes five steps forward and hopes for the best but ends up crashing into somebody anyways.

“Are you alright?” The person says and they grab her elbow lightly as a way to steady her from falling, but all she can do is blink rapidly as your face slowly comes into view.

“Yeah I’m fine.” Jenna says trying to grasp the fact that she ran into the one person she’d been dwelling on about less than five minutes ago.

What kinda’ve game did the universe plan on playing today?

“Are you sure? You still look a little dazed.” Victoria questions with a look of worry, you’d unintentionally shielded her from Jenna’s view and now she’s realized that you’d come to the movie premiere with her as your plus one after catching a glimpse of the other woman’s arm interlocked comfortably with your own.

A harsh game it seems. But why?

“Oh wait I know why,” you say and it spooks Jenna, how’d you know what she was thinking? If you could still read her as easily as you once did- would you really be diabolical enough to showcase her concerns in front of others? She wills herself to calm down with the reminder that you’ve never been the type and that’s really only worst case scenario.

“It was because of that photographer huh! I thought I died and saw god when he took some pictures of us.” You continue with a laugh unintentially dispensing out another grueling thought to replace the other because the only thing that stands out to Jenna in that statement is your use of the word “us”.

“I think I need glasses now.” Jenna says making Victoria and you laugh, she knows that it’s because of her joke but seeing you do it with Victoria rubs her the wrong way.

“It’s been so long, how are you?” Victoria asks excitedly reaching out to hug her, Jenna internally scolds herself for feeling this way about someone who’s without a doubt happy to have run into her.

“I’m doing really good… what about you guys?” Jenna lies copying Victoria’s movements and reaching out for a hug too.

Before either of you can answer and continue the conversation a coordinator steps forward to apologize for interrupting but mentions that you’re all required to move along because of the influx of people arriving on the red carpet.

“It’s alright I’m sorry about that sir,” you say before focusing on Jenna once more with a smile that’s warm and gentle enough to drown out the rest of the world around her, “we’re doing good too, it’s really nice seeing you again.”

And with that you’d left her.

The breakup happened about a year and a half ago, but whatever the both of you did apart from each other was still talked about widespread and analyzed through the lenses of “In separation, what and how are they doing now?” Or “Why’d it happen? And whose fault is it?”

The latter one being the worser of two evils because it overpowered fact with fiction of how it really ended.

Jenna broke up with you but a year ago the popular release of your hit song made the people think otherwise, the reality of this was that they actually painted you in a bad light because of it.

‘It happened because Y/N didn’t love Jenna anymore, so it’s her fault.’ But that was the furthest thing from the truth, and yet this belief diminished your reputation, Jenna felt guilty about it. She didn’t know what to expect when she’d heard you’d both been going viral after you released a song, but after listening to it she realized you wrote it from her perspective during the breakup, not yours.

The media crucified you because of these speculations, any mistakes that you’d made in the past were brought up and used to pick your image apart.

The worst one being that drug use played a part in the breakup.

You’d grown up as a child actress same as Jenna, but unlike her you were never given the choice to quit. You were forced into this life by greedy parents and discouraged from doing anything else. You were miserable and there’d been a time where you used drugs as a coping mechanism.

So of course, they accused you of falling off the wagon.

“Are you sure about this?” Owen says carefully pulling Jenna out of her thoughts.

“Have you seen the headlines? I’m sure.”

“And you’ve talked to her about it?” Owen questions offering her a sympathetic smile, but it only confuses her.

“Why would I talk to her about it? It’s the truth and it’ll help her with these assholes.” Jenna asks narrowing her eyes at Owen.

‘Help her but hurt you.’ Owen wants to say but he bites back the comment, he knows Jenna’s making this announcement to stop the public from condemning you but there’s a reason you’d never done it yourself.

“Nothing, I was just wondering.” Owen responds turning around and away from view to organize the mountain of papers on his desk, Jenna wants to press him for information but she already knows he won’t give her any.

“Did you like the film?” Owen asks walking towards the bar in his office to fix himself a drink, when Jenna doesn’t answer he takes a quick glance at her and sees that she’s back in her own little world again.

“Yeah it was… good.” Jenna trails off not wanting to admit that she missed about half of it because she’d been focused on you, well you and Victoria Pedretti.

The premiere didn’t have assigned seating but she’d gotten there a bit late- and not that long before Victoria and you did, that unfortunately meant you both were seated about three rows ahead of Jenna. At the beginning of the film you kept whispering things to one another and quietly laughing, the half that Jenna missed happened to be after Victoria rested her head on your shoulder. Jenna couldn’t stop thinking about close she was to you, the way your body softly shook with laughter whenever she said something to you, her bright smile merely inches away from your neck.

“For what’s it’s worth, I don’t think the rumors are true.” Owen comes back with two glasses of his expensive tequila, setting one of them right in front of Jenna and taking his own with him to his seat across from her.

“I know she’s sober.” Jenna thanks him with a nod, appreciative for the man who’s been akin to a protective father to her and you alike.

“Without a doubt, but I’m not talking about that.” Owen says with a pointed look, of course he’d know.

“That’s none of my business.” Jenna responds but the way she picks up the glass of tequila and downs it in one go says otherwise.

“You’re still in love with her.” Owen says and Jenna’s about to deny it but Owen’s one of the few people who knows her well enough to see through her lies.

“It’s not a crime to still feel some type of way about a person you share history with,” he continues getting up from the comfort of his chair to refill her glass once more “you never did actually tell me why you broke up.”

“Can you just have Emilia make the announcement already?” Jenna quips at him trying to change the subject, he merely hums immediately doing what’s been asked of him.

“It’s… complicated.” She finally admits when he hangs up his phone after calling her PR agent. Since she’d the one to break up with you, she felt as if she was in the wrong for being upset about the idea that you’ve already moved on and now here she was accidentally snapping at Owen for something that’s not his fault.

“We’ve got time.” He shrugs passively setting her freshly poured drink down in front her.

“You’ve got any limes?” Jenna asks downing the glass, Owen laughs going to cut up some limes and deciding it’d be better to just bring the bottle of tequila for the rest of this conversation.

[rosescries]

Excuse me while I scream a bit about The Rehabilitation of Death by @bamsara for a bit, about something I think I picked up but haven't been able to put into words. Some of it they've clearly talked about before, and the rest I may be completely wrong about.

Maybe this is some of my interpretation of the Lamb and Narinder, but Bam's influenced a lot of that for me when they dragged me kicking and screaming into this fandom, but shh!

They've talked about love between Narinder and Lamb before. Their devotion to and respect for each other, and just how much they care for each other. I think Trod Bad End says a lot about that. With how Narinder is ready to burn the world down just to bring the Lamb back, and I'm sure the Lamb shares some of, if not all, the same feelings.

But their love has claws and teeth, I think it hurts them just as much as it uplifts them. It's blooded and a gaping wound, aching and there's nothing they can really do about it. Not that they'd probably be willing to do anything about it. And I think some of that hurt is just caused by their grief.

Narinder's already been betrayed by his siblings, siblings which he did love. Dearly, in fact, and still does no matter how much he denies it and how angry he is. He would've killed them, if not for the Lamb, but he's still keeping them. Hurting them, but they're in his reach. He's not letting them go, keeping them close and alive in some way. I don't think he could kill them for real, or would be happy if he did. They loved him too, I'm sure. As proven by Shamura sending him gifts and the offerings left on his alter. There is love lost here, whether Narinder or any of the Bishops are willing to admit it or not.

He loves the Lamb just as much, which is why the betrayal hurt so much. I think he's lashing out at the Lamb just like he did with his siblings. A fresh wound left to fester ripped open all over again. It hurts, and makes it seem like everyone in his life is eventually going to turn around and stab him in the back. He lost his family, and it seems like he's loosing the one he loves too. Even if it's not true, that's probably how it seems.

And the Lamb is the last of their kind. There's no one else like them anymore, their loved ones are gone. They lost their family, and isn't even really able to grieve them before they're sent on this mission to kill their tormentors. But that does give them an outlet, something to quell the rage for a little bit at least. And a bit motivator after a while. Along with a new family.

The Lamb loves Narinder, there's no real question about that. But their love asks them to kneel and sacrifice themselves to him, and they can't. They can't do that. They don't know what Narinder had planned for them, they couldn't have known. But the person they love is asking for something the Lamb just can't give him. They love him, but this isn't something they can bend on.

I'm running out of words and I don't know how to put my thoughts on Lambert down. But I think they parallel Narinder in a certain way, and grief is some kind of motivator for both of them. I hope I made some kind of sense here, and may just be reiterating something that is glaringly clear or talking out of my ass.

Anyway, if you haven't read Trod, go read it right now. It's really good.

[loveandlegacy]

ngl i think there are a lot of cool/interesting things to say about the sex scene between jayce and mel, but i am not wild about justifying it by pointing to its plot relevance. its presence IS justified, i just think the furthering-the-plot argument is using the wrong framework to understand the function of sex in media at all and kind of belies a deeply conservative impulse about what sex is or does or what it's for in art. and like i don't really blame anyone for this. i think this attitude of 'well it has to be plot relevant to be present' particularly in film is born partly out of a reaction to a long history of film & tv having gross attitudes about women and very unpleasant assumptions about roles in sex.

in tv in particular, hbo comes to mind as having been the only prestige network for a really long time where nudity/semi-explicit sex was permissible. and like while it was/is permissible, a lot of hbo productions deploy sex in a way that feels deeply unimaginative and misogynistic. obviously hbo isn't the sole culprit. the whole concept of the male gaze was developed bc of film's treatment of women, and the games industry stacks on top of that by being so misogynistic in its sexualization of women that it feels like a joke. so i get why people balk at that — i do too — but these media properties and outlets shouldn't be the gold standard for sex in media anyway and the solution to them shouldn't be "well sex is only Allowed when it serves the very utilitarian and quasi-calvinist purpose of furthering the plot".

if nothing else, sex is an important part of life and connection for many people. including it in art to demonstrate or reflect that fact is ideally something normal, or could be if we in the united states could at least deconstruct our neuroses about sex. my one friend always says that sex in itself is a kind of character study, which is valuable regardless of how much it furthers the plot. you can even see this with jayce and mel! people joke a bunch about jayce being the little spoon and not to be like too annoyingly into close readings of a sex scene but the entire arc of his encounter with mel tells you a lot about both of them as people that arguably could not really be presented in any other context. mel initiates but she does so in a moment of vulnerability, right after talking about her family, a major pain point in her life (and not lol after she supposedly like...bamboozled him with Sexual Allure and alcohol or whatever people say). jayce follows her lead for a while (she kisses him first, he is happy to have her push him onto the bed) and eventually breaks from this pattern to go down on her, not to demand something for himself.

either this says something about him as a person or says something about gender and expectations for sexual courtship overall in the world of arcane. like in our world men who "submit" (lol) to women's sexual desires or who give primacy to a woman's sexual interest are still framed kind of as a joke in mainstream US culture even though 'mean mommy dommy' jokes abound on the internet. but is that also true in piltover & zaun? is jayce the exception to the rule or is he in keeping with the rule? we kind of don't know ironically bc we have no other information about in-world sex in the whole of season 1. even with the brothel, there are open-ended questions: is trading sex for money illegal? is it illegal in piltover but a weird grey-market activity in zaun? what kinds of sexual mores exist in piltover, zaun, or both, and what relationships to people have to them? vi describes the brothel as 'the one place where all the secrets are spilled' and that seems like it's in keeping with how civilian clients are about sex work irl in the united states but that's more or less all we have to work with.

i'm not saying arcane should seek to answer all these things or to deliver a complete taxonomy on in-world sex and sexuality. the story is dealing with other themes. it just seems strange to me to laud arcane for it's skill in efficient but well-textured worldbuilding and then to abjure the possibility of the presence of sex outside of plot-relevant reasons when sex would tell us as much about the world as the touch that smoking is a sign of power in the undercity.

if the concern is that somehow any non-plot-sex would be too gross in its treatment of women, i guess i would say that it was amanda overton who advocated for the sex scene in the first place, not alex yee or christian linke. so like why not trust that she may be capable of writing/directing further instances of sex without defaulting to something unpleasant?

and if the objection is "well i don't want to be made to feel horny in an otherwise non-horny experience" my answer would be that the point of sex in media can be communicative sometimes, not always titillating. going back to jayce and mel and character studies, i wasn't (and i don't think most people were?) suddenly horny during that scene. i thought the literal art direction was weird, but mostly what i took from the scene about these two characters was that their mode of relating to one another was actually very tender. it cemented that mel was falling in love with jayce, and that the we the audience were supposed to understand their sex as sweet, not particularly provocative or designed to fulfill an assumed sexual fantasy on our behalf.

but there's also no reason to assume that any two other characters in the story would have sex in that tenor, even if they were in love. there's no reason to assume that any two other characters might NOT have sweet sex outside the context of love. the only way we could know that is if it were to occur on screen, and getting a greater diversity of sex and sexual encounters on screen requires the audience to be open to sex not just as a normal part of life, but as a semiotic object in art that has value beyond driving the plot forward.

tl;dr it's nice that the sex in arcane had some greater impact on the plot mechanics, but i don't think that's the primary value of its presence and i'm glad it's there with or without it mattering to the plot. it's unlikely but i hope s2 can give us a fuller picture of how other characters relate to sex as well.