#whump recovery

[slippedtheknot]

"I Didn't Mean to,"

Whumpee sobbed as their shaking fingers grabbed pieces of porcelain. Blood dripped onto the floor from the sharp edges.

Heavy boots were coming down the hall and Whumpee tried moving faster; no doubt that Whumper would be pissed that Whumpee broke his plate. Whumpee swallowed when the boots stopped in front of them.

"Uh oh, what happened, Whumpee?" Whumper's voice was an eerie type of calm.

Whumpee tried to still their breathing so that they would be slightly coherent: "I...I broke a plate. I promise that I didn't mean to though! It...it just slipped from my hands when I was putting dishes away and I tried to clean it up. Not to hide the fact that I dropped it just-"

"Hey hey, it's all okay." Whumper's hand rubbed the back of Whumpee's neck and they froze; waiting for Whumper to slam their head into the floor. "Can you look up for me, Whumpee?"

Whumpee tilted their head up and was met with minty green eyes. That's odd...as far as Whumpee knew Whumper had cold and distant blue eyes that would stare into their soul. As far as Whumpee knew, Caretaker had the minty green eyes.

Whumpee blinked again and looked into his eyes. The eyes definitely belonged to Caretakeer, but then, why were they in Whumper's kitchen?

"You aren't there anymore, Whumpee." Caretaker's hand moved to Whumpee's shoulder as he pulled them into a much-needed hug.

[literarystarfish]

Whumpees who flinch.

The ones who always expect the worst to befall them no matter what because that's all they've ever known for years. Even now that they've been rescued.

So when Caretaker makes a sudden move or when some loud noise sounds or something unexpected occurs, they flinch. They take steps back immediately.

Especially when they're nervous wrecks and they can't help but be constantly on edge.

A phone pinged for a text message? Flinching every time.

A loud noise in the kitchen? Cowering.

Someone lifts a hand to reach something up high? Eyes squeezed shut, ready for the blow to land.

Nervous, anxious, flinching whumpees.

[cravesunconditionallove]

Whumpee who wakes up in the ICU, disoriented, panicking because there’s a tube in their throat and everything hurts and they don’t remember what happened. Caretaker soothing them, holding their hand(s) to keep them from pulling at the things keeping them alive.

“Shh, you’re okay…. no no, don’t do that—“

[the-bar-sinister]

Recovering whumpee returning to a place where they were badly injured and being unable to shut out the memories of what happened to them.

Whumpee's eyes drawn to the spot where they lay, huddled and bleeding. Is there really still a mark there on the ground? Or are they imagining it?

Why can't they stop hearing the sounds of their own screams and pleading echoing in their ears?

Whumpee, shaking and swallowing repeatedly, telling themselves they should be stronger than this, they have to be stronger than this.

Whumpee jolting in surprise and whirling around in fear at a touch on their shoulder; caretaker coming to check on them.

[justwhumptypethings]

realistic ptsd in whump from someone who has (undiagnosed) ptsd

tw: flashbacks, mention of sh, whumpee in denial

whumpee who can trigger a flashback in themselves just by thinking about it, sometimes entirely unprompted

after that happens whumpee feels like this can’t be a flashback and they can’t be triggered bc there was nothing that triggered it they just thought about it

whumpee’s flashbacks and the subsequent panic attacks aren’t loud and noticeable, to the outside perspective it looks like their just staring off and breathing really slowly

flashbacks aren’t as much hallucinating that you’re back in the whump as it is just feeling the sensations you felt

like literally ANY mention of it makes whumpee freeze up, this works especially well if they aren’t dealing with their whump and are instead like. ignoring it and hoping it miraculously goes away

whumpee who’s body physically reacts to it whenever they try to talk about it, breaking out in goosebumps and shivers

whumpee who’s ptsd makes it virtually impossible for them to make progress in recovery

whumpee who has a lot of trouble grounding themselves out of their flashbacks and asking for help during their flashback bc it doesn’t look like you’d expect a flashback to look, they aren’t crying curled up in a ball or anything, but they can’t think or breathe

maybe whumpee ends up taking up sh to ground, digging their fingers into their palms or scratching at their arm or biting at the inside of their cheek

whumpee who’s caretaker doesn’t even realize they’re having flashbacks or trauma responses because they don’t look how they expect them to

somwtimes things trigger them or make them anxious that wouldn’t have before and it doesn’t actually necessarily put them back into the whump but instead just make them deeply uncomfortable. for ex if your whumpee was kept in a cage now they are claustrophobic about hugs. but it doesn’t necessarily remind them distinctly of the whump, like they aren’t like ‘oh I’m claustrophobic because I was kept in a cage’ it’s more ‘why is this freaking me out?? I’ve never been claustrophobic before’ and it’s not obvious it’s happening bc of the whump

whumpee in denial that anything is actually happening to them. it can’t be ptsd. why not? it cant

[caledine]

Dulling.

Whumpees that get small after captivity. They used to be loud and proud and Caretaker would watch them prance around all peacock like with a weird confidence that encapsulated them. They were flamboyant, bright coloured hair and spontaneous looking clothing. Coloured graphic liner and jewellery galore. They spent hours perfecting every outfit down to the last bracelet or scarf.

When Whumpee comes back they are dull. They curl in on themselves and the over grown roots are never dyed back— in fact they went natural for the first time since high school. The outfits they had so much fun choosing became generic. They blend right back in with the crowed refusing to be different in case it’s what leads Whumper right back to them.

They’d learnt how to make themselves small, quiet, unnoticeable in a busy room and not easily remembered to the common public. They curl small and whisper. They don’t giggle and hum to the radio or compliment strangers on their uniqueness.

Caretaker can’t even recognise their own friend.

[whumpberry-cookie]

Caretaker does NOT have patience to meet Whumpee's needs atm.

Are they bad... or just tired?

(Cw: bad caretaker, victim blaming)

_____________

"You won't fall asleep in your state anyway. So PLEASE just be quiet so I can rest at least. I'll be the one carrying you on my back tomorrow."

"I don't have energy to comfort you right now, Whumpee. So just focus on breathing.. or stuff."

"When I tell you what to do to deal with pain, you just don't listen. What do you expect from me?"

"How many times do I have to calm you down? My best clearly isn't enough for you, if you need me to repeat that moment after".

*Wearing noice cancelling headphones, because Whumpee's just crying and whimpering SO loud. Non stop*

*under his breath* Gosh I'm not surprised Whumper was gagging him.

"Whumpee GO. to. sleep. (...) Then lay down with your eyes closed and don't get up."

(C:) "What do you want me to do?! I can't help you! I don't know how!" (W:) "hug me.. just hug me" (C:) *sigh* "Come here."

-------------------

[yet-another-heathen]

On the topic of realistic conditioning/deconditioning,

If the trigger is something whumpee wouldn't hear often when they're with caretaker but whumpee still wants to break it because they might hear it elsewhere (like kneel being taken as a command)

Would whumpee ask caretaker to casually trigger them so they have the opportunity to challenge it in their own head and in a safe place? Would this be a good idea for recovery?

And of course being there with the praise everytime whumpee makes just a little bit of progress, or comfort when they don't.

Heads up, anon: your ask was an EXCEPTIONALLY good one, and I ended up writing another mini TED talk (~3-4 min read) in response. Thank you so much for sending it in!

...on Conditioned Whumpees - Part 3

[ Part 1 - Part 2 ]

That is a very, very good idea! You're spot on with all of it, particularly operating in a safe environment where whumpee is ultimately calling the shots. Having that comfort/support readily available will make a huge difference in how well whumpee can tackle the matter. And while the process isn't fun, approaching desensitization with this much intent is much, much more likely to result in success.

I can offer a few pointers that can add another few layers of realism, as well as some other things to think about while tailoring it to your story:

if whumpee is actively working through their conditioning in this way, memories of their trauma will become closer to the surface. As a result, all of their other PTSD symptoms will be elevated during the course of their practice sessions, as well as for at least a few weeks after.

flashbacks are a very common experience during times like this. engaging with triggers like this is going to cause their flashbacks to become more frequent and intense.

during such flashbacks, it is almost a given that whumpee's mind and body will enter a similar state to the one it was in during the time when the flashback was taking place. By that I mean that the fear they felt in that moment, where it was physically located in their body, will echo into their body in the present moment. Same goes for other all other emotions, and sometimes even phantom aches surrounding any injuries they received at the time...

while the emotions tend to be identical to the ones felt during the trauma, in my experience, the pain comes out distorted in a similar way to the way it does in dreams: less intense, and more "blurry" and imprecise in location. When we say that someone having a flashback is "reliving the moment", we mean that their body literally feels as though they're in the same immediate danger that it was in back then.

this is true even though they'll be aware to at least some degree that they're presently with caretaker and safe.

the flashbacks don't always happen immediately after the conditioning trigger is used. Often they flare up hours or days later, sometimes without warning, sometimes as a result of encountering a different flashback trigger. The whumpee's thresholds for what counts as a trigger will drop, which is part of what causes the flashbacks to happen more often. Something they could normally ignore is going to affect them much more while they're like this.

your whumpee is more likely to experience severe mood swings while in this heightened state. Especially feelings like irritability, frustration, anger, loneliness, and grief. This stuff ain't pretty, folks. Even your sweet cinnamon bun is most likely going to lash out at someone as a result.

PTSD episodes are also exhausting. your whumpee is going to feel mentally, physically, and emotionally drained. And, to add insult to injury, being tired amplifies the emotions listed above.

Now all of this said, your whumpee may or may not know that this is to be expected. If they've worked on processing their trauma before this, they'll have figured out that one often leads to the other. They'll go into the deconditioning practice knowing this is coming, and will approach it carefully, but with a fairly level head. Knowing that it'll suck, but they'll come out the other side okay.

If not, they're in for a rather nasty surprise.

For the latter, they will feel at first that the deconditioning practice is making everything worse. They're suddenly struggling the way they did when the trauma was fresher, and it can be tempting to stop and refuse to touch it again because the mental/emotional pain gets so intense.

If they do give up at this stage, it will make trying again far more daunting in the future.

But the trauma being stirred up is actually a sign that it's helping. It means that the whumpee is starting to process what happened to them, which is a fundamental step in being able to heal.

Note: All throughout the process, crying is a very good thing. It lets them physically get rid of a lot of the brain chemicals associated with these surges of emotion. Letting themselves cry over things they couldn't cry about back then can actually help them let go of those feelings in a similar way to if they'd been able to process them in the moment. [Which is the basis for much of EMDR, a specialized tool used in trauma therapy.]

Okay. So now we know what other effects can cascade from the actual deconditioning practice, now we have some things to consider.

First off, what time parameters are whumpee and caretaker working within while deconditioning? There are three basic options:

they sit down together and practice repeatedly using the trigger for [X amount of time; usually <45m at once] back to back. Once that time is up, caretaker will no longer use the trigger at all, the excercise will end, and they'll get up to do something else.

whumpee sets a specific window of time [X number of hours] within which caretaker will use the trigger word at random points. Once that time has elapsed, the exercise is over.

over the course of days, caretaker uses the trigger word at random points without giving warning. the excercise only stops after being ended by whumpee.

Now why is that important? Because of something called hypervigilance. It is another symptom of PTSD which, to put it into the simplest words, is whumpee waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's a heightened state of tension and wariness in which whumpee is expecting that something bad is going to happen, and is constantly searching for any sign to indicate when it's coming.

It is beyond exhausting.

Imagine knowing that someone is about to slap you as hard as they can, and you have to sit there with your eyes closed, waiting for it. The breath-holding, the flinchiness, the rigid tension in your body as you strain to listen for when they're coming.

Only now, stretch that moment out into hours. Days. Weeks. That is hypervigilance.

A hypervigilant whumpee is not going to be able to relax. Or rest. Or decompress. Or readily trust much of anything around them. They're MUCH more likely to flinch at sudden movements/sounds. They might start biting their nails or showing other signs of nervousness and distress.

These methods above have a gradually increasing chance of setting off whumpee's hypervigilance. If they know exactly when the next trigger is coming, as in example 1, then their 'waiting for it' tension will be low. But the more uncertain they become of exactly when it's going to happen, as in examples 2 & 3, the worse the hypervigilance is going to get.

The trade off is that the later examples are more effective in desensitizing them toward the trigger. The more their practice mimics encountering an unexpected trigger in day-to-day life, the easier it will be to fall back on that desensitization when the time comes.

Therefore, it would be a very good idea for a whumpee who's new to this to start with number 1, then gradually progress to 2 & 3 as time goes on. They should be the one to decide when the next step is made, and if/when they need to dial it back.

Other questions to ask yourself while plotting:

how mentally prepared is whumpee for worsening symptoms? what about caretaker? did either of them know it was coming?

how much of this heightened PTSD stress can your whumpee take before it becomes too much? how do they react when they do hit that tipping point?

if caretaker feels that whumpee is getting too distressed during practice even though they're not tapping out, would they call it off themself? Or would they ultimately leave that decision to whumpee?

based on the answer, how would whumpee feel about caretaker's decision? Relieved? Belittled? Betrayed?

does whumpee have any grounding tools they can use while practicing?

how does caretaker handle the mood swings and instability that come with whumpee's heightened PTSD? You should consider both their internal and external reactions on the matter.

how does whumpee prefer to decompress after a practice session? what things would help them calm down and recover?

how long do they need (hours or days) before the next attempt?

Even with all I've just written, there's far more to the resulting hightened state of PTSD than flashbacks and hypervigilance. PTSD symptoms that they're most likely to encounter in the background while doing deconditioning practice include:

Flinchiness, anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, exhaustion, emotional mood swings, outbursts, crying spells, depression, executive dysfunction, dissociation, numbness, racing thoughts, freeze responses, tremors, inappetence, muscle tension, and heart palpitations.

Yes, usually many of them at once, even those that contradict. Your whumpee is going to have a LOT going on at once, and it is not going to be a fun time. I recommend looking up any of the above symptoms you don't recognize, and looking for whump inspiration in what you learn.

(Because everyone experiences PTSD episodes differently, there's a lot of wiggle room in which ones whumpee will encounter. Don't feel pressured to use all of them, find what you want to write and have fun with it!)

Thanks again for the incredible ask, anon. And again, I want to congratulate you on how spot-on your original ask was. You nailed it. I know this was a lot more than you asked for, but I hope this provides helpful context for your whump! My inbox will always be open if you think of anything more <3

[thinkingofausername]

do you think recovered curly would wear gloves over his prosthetics to gain back some softness? do you think he would move around in bed or feel unsettled because lying still would remind him of the past? would he watch attentively at all times, struggle to trust people or let them come close? would he flinch when someone's hand approached his face? feel sick when cutting bread? stay away from pills at all cost? get caught off guard every time he looks in a mirror? would he be torn between fearing people, fearing misreading them and feeling that he needs to do more for them, fight for them in ways he didn't before? is there any bigger picture left? or does he only notice details and hold back vomit at things other people don't look at twice?

[morbidmira]

wholesome caretaking/recovery prompts

Changing bandages

"You've got visitors."

Cuddling

Displays of trust

Wheelchairs/Assistive devices/Helping them walk

"I made your favorite food."

Hot drinks - hot chocolate, tea, or apple cider

Tears of frustration

Witness protection (or canon equivalent)

Boredom

Washing/brushing/cutting hair

Fainting/collapsing from exhaustion

"You're safe now, I promise."

Sweets/baking

Forehead kisses

"Haven't seen you in awhile, where have you been?"

[a-class-attempter]

Caretaker sees Whumpee for the first time after their rescue. Whumpee is like a parent to Caretaker and to see Whumpee reduced to scarred flesh on a hospital bed breaks them.

Caretaker stays with Whumpee for days, barely getting any sleep. When Whumpee finally wakes up, they hold Caretaker close.

“Do you want to know what kept me alive?” Whumpee asks.

Caretaker, so overcome with a mix of terror and relief, can only nod.

Whumpee squeezes Caretaker’s hand. “You did, Caretaker. I lived so I could see your face again.”

[sugarsweetwriter]

Whumpee who's required to go to weekly therapy sessions.

Whumpee who takes hours of pleading with to finally get to the car, where they sit quietly for the whole car ride, stiff and uncomfortable.

Whumpee who clings to Caretaker's side for the whole therapy session, unwilling to let go of them even when it's supposed to be a one-on-one appointment.

Whumpee who practically runs back to the car the second the clock strikes whatever time the appointments supposed to end.

Caretaker who feels so guilty for having to drag Whumpee to these appointments while knowing how much Whumpee despises them.

Caretaker who takes Whumpee out to do something fun they enjoy after every appointment.

Caretaker who cuddles up with Whumpee on the bed/couch whenever they get home to watch a show or movie and give Whumpee their favourite food or snack.

[literarystarfish]

When Caretaker just kind of incorporates Whumpee into their life, and doesn’t treat them any different than they do with any of their other friends even though they know what they’ve gone through.

They don’t baby them. They don’t tiptoe around them. They just treat them like a person. Like any random person. Like any of their friends.

(Unless, of course, its something specific to accommodate an unavoidable trauma, but Caretaker has never made a big deal about “such little changes to make you feel more comfortable. If you don’t want me to touch you or crowd you, thats no big deal! I make sure I have vegetarian snacks when Other-Friend comes over. It’s basically the same thing!”)

Whumpee appreciates this more than they could ever express to Caretaker. And their nonchalance about it all just makes it so much easier. After years of not feeling like a real person, being treated like one just feels so…. normal. Nice. … Better than nice. Incredible.

[chiharuuu22]

During the healing process, Whumpee needed many things, both for physical and mental healing. What are they?

Rest. Of course. There is no need to explain anymore. A good rest would restore Whumpee's body and mind after all his stress and suffering.

Calmness. From the environment and the people around Whumpee. Apart from the hospital, an isolation house far from the hustle and bustle of the chaotic city would be a good place to support Whumpee's recovery. Maybe a Caretaker's house would be better.

Medical. Medication is consumed to support healing (antibiotics, vitamins, painkillers, etc.). Medical equipment was used during the treatment and healing period. Professional medical personnel will care for Whumpee until he is completely healed.

Foods high in nutrition. Of course, it's easy to digest. Healthy food usually doesn't taste good, but it's the Caretaker's job to make the food able to whet Whumpee's appetite.

Water. There is no need to ask. Hydration is very important for Whumpee's body as it recovers.

Snack. Taking medicine every day definitely makes Whumpee bored. A little snack will help. The cookies, candy, or chocolate that Whumpee eats after swallowing the bitter medicine will make him smile.

Fresh air and morning sunshine. Many people say that fresh air and morning sunlight are also good medicine for recovery. Taking a breath and basking in the cool of the morning would be great for Whumpee.

Clean clothes. Replace every two times a day.

Bathe. Bathing in the morning and evening makes the body fresh and clean. Maybe at first, Caretaker won't immediately pour water but will wipe Whumpee's body with soapy water.

Straighten hair. Maybe cut it when Whumpee starts to get better. Apart from making it look fresher, Whumpee will also feel comfortable.

Comfort items. Plusies, stuffed animals, pillows, blankets, photos, scent, or anything else that can keep Whumpee calm and comfortable during the recovery period.

A change of scenery during recovery will also be helpful. Occasionally moving Whumpee to the living room, sitting him in the dining room, accompanying him on the terrace, or taking him to sit on the grass in the garden will make Whumpee feel better.

Light and pleasant conversation. Don't expect to be able to interrogate Whumpee during the recovery period if you don't want to be shouted at by Caretaker.

Touch. Whumpee is definitely touch-starved. A holding hand, a caress on the cheek, a stroking of the hair, a light kiss on the forehead, a hug, or a backrest when sitting will be what Whumpee really needs.

Calming sentences. Simple sentences that make Whumpee feel safe, such as "It's okay, you're safe", "I'm here", "no one will hurt you anymore", "I will take care of you", "it was just a dream, it's all over", "just rest, don't think about anything", "go to sleep, I'll be here when you wake up", "you did a good job", "I'm proud of you", "thank you for coming back to me," "I'm happy you are here," "I love you," and others.

Caretaker. There is no need to ask. Caretaker is the "medicine" that Whumpee needs most for his healing.

Anything you want to add?

[the-bar-sinister]

Young, or inexperienced caretaker who doesn't quite know what they're doing but is trying their best to help recovering whumpee.

So whumpee just ends up absolutely covered in pillows and blankets and plushies, and surrounded by hot water bottles and ice packs and, and mugs of tea, and bowls of soup and anything else that caretaker can think of that might help.

[justwhumptypethings]

tw; dehumanization, disassociation, aftermath of conditioning

whumpee who’s just.. blank after. staring off, quiet like the dead.

they don’t only not speak unless spoken to, they don’t speak unless they’re asked a question. They could be having a conversation, and even then their answers are barebones and vague enough to not get them hurt. and as soon as caretaker says something that’s not a direct question, whumpee doesn’t answer.

they sit there in the back of the room silent. caretaker forgets they’re there sometimes. maybe they start panicking if their nose is clogged or their breathing is audible for some reason, because they can’t stop making noise.

their eyes are dull. they’re exhausted, nearly always disassociated or derealized, not focusing on their body or the world around them because they expect the people around them to pay as much attention to them as they would an object.

they don’t understand when people talk to them. they don’t react unless someone says their name like an order.

the way they talk is always vague enough that it could agree with whatever the person who’s talking to them says. they are hesitant to take any real stance. maybe they seen confused when someone asks them what they want.

they never really get comfortable with talking again. not the same way they were before.