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kylieswift31 · 6 months ago

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Taylor Swift and the Truman show

"Well, for me, there is no difference between a private life and a public life. My life... is my life, is the Truman show."

Tied together with a smile

Taylor is currently at the peak of her career as she's now breaking her own records and reaching a level of fame only seen by the greatest such as the Beatles and Michael Jackson. Yet underneath all that success is a layer of conflict due to the discrepancies between her private and public life. With closer inspection it is clear to see that Taylor has left a trail of breadcrumbs that reveal that she has been queer since the beginning of her career. The ‘love struck and boy crazy’ version we first saw of Taylor was supposed to be a temporary step in her career during the fearless era, but through a series of unfortunate events she has spent the entirety of her career in the closet.

Now with the ending of the rerecords and eras tour in sight, Taylor has begun to reveal the cracks in the facade of her public persona so that we can see who she really is underneath. Her performance of 'delicate' on the eras tour is a visual representation of this process. Throughout the song we slowly see cracks forming in the glass, one at a time until at last there are so many cracks the entire stage shatters into a million tiny little pieces.

But what causes the cracks?

Taylor.

And it’s all inspired by the Truman show…

Daily life

In the mirror

The first time you watch the Truman show, the focus is on Truman and his journey. He lives a normal life in Seahaven with his wife Meryl, has a successful career in finance and spends his free time with his best friend Marlon. There are small cracks in the facade of his picture perfect life from the beginning, but halfway through we reach a turning point as it becomes clear that Truman is also the star of a 24 hour reality TV show that broadcasts his life to the public without his knowledge. Every move he makes is being observed by the outside. And then when you get to the end of the movie you start to realise that not everything you saw was as it seems.

Taylor has several well known Easter eggs that reference the Truman show, but with further investigation we can discover that she also relates to his story on a personal level. In the song 'mirrorball' Taylor explores the theme of wearing a mask that reflects back what the viewer wants or chooses to see. Just like an iceberg, if we stop at the surface level of what we see of Taylor’s personal life, we’ll miss the depth of what lies underneath. Many of her music videos echo Truman's story in a way that leaves her truth hiding in plain sight.

Good neighbours

Truman’s day starts with a moment of quiet reflection as he gazes at himself in the mirror before greeting his neighbours on his way to work. “Good morning! And incase I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening and good night!” His iconic catchphrase is repeated each day. Even though Truman’s the only person in Seahaven who isn’t a paid actor, he’s having the same scripted interactions day after day. His life is centred around acting the part, just like everyone else. The only difference is that he’s wearing a mask to hide how he really feels underneath. Truman's day is very reminiscent of the groundhog day trope to highlight how scripted and repetitive his life has become.

Taylor's life in the public is very similar to Truman's now that she can't go anywhere without being recognised. The once unfiltered teen that was vocal on myspace has become selective and restrained with what she shares online after years of having her life picked apart for all to see. The chasm between Taylor's public and private life has grown to the point where removing the pop star mask will impact her career.

Product placement

The Truman show is sustained through the revenue generated from the products advertised on the show. The first time we meet Truman's wife Meryl is when she's showing him the latest gadget she's picked up from the store on her way home from work. This feels subtle at first, but as more products are mentioned throughout the show it becomes more obvious and the advertising feels more akin to a late night shopping channel. We start to see that everything from the decor, wardrobe and food they eat is for sale. Every aspect of Truman's life has become commodified to generate revenue and to keep the show running.

All the little Easter eggs throughout Taylor's 'lover' music video seem like personalised advertisements now that we’ve seen that they advertise memorabilia on the Truman show in a similar way. However, within her career marketing is an integral facet of Taylor's career. "When you realise the rules of the game you're playing and how it will affect you, you got to look at the board and make your strategy. But at the same time, writing songs has never been a strategic element of my career. But I'm not scared to say that other things in my career, like how to market an album, are strictly strategic."

Hidden in plain sight

It's not obvious at first that Truman and Marlon have found a way to communicate with each other honestly whilst remaining undetected. Truman is often sharing his plans of going to Fiji to get away for a while. However, when he's really planning to leave Truman says "Just between you and me Marlon, I'm going away for a while." This allows the viewer to believe that it's just another wishful thought about going to Fiji, but said in a way that lets Marlon know that he is serious this time. Beer seems to be both another advertisement and a signal to indicate that he's been sent by the director. "It's all true. It's all real. Nothing here is fake. Nothing you see on the show is fake. It's merely controlled." Later on when we're shown that the director is feeding Marlon his lines, it's clear that he has always tried to be as honest as possible with Truman.

Taylor mentions wine frequently through her discography. Perhaps this is to show us that her truth has become so watered down within her lyrics that she lost sight of who she was before. Taylor has changed up pronouns and added hidden meaning to words and phrases mentioned frequently throughout her discography. Through this process she has become incredibly skilled at seamlessly adding connections to multiple muses within a song.

The first crack in the glass

Everything changed

From what we can see, Truman has known from the beginning that he's been the central character within his town to some degree. Truman appears to be fairly content with the life he had created for himself, despite the confinement he felt (he hasn't known any different). This all came to an end when Truman realises that his father is still alive. This changes everything as the first cracks in the facade of his seemingly perfect life become visible.

Intercepted

A very similar experience happens with Taylor in the 'delicate' music video. We can see that this interaction leaves Taylor more aware of those around her. "People often greatly underestimate me on how much I'll inconvenience myself to prove a point…" In her real life there are several events we could attribute to being her motive for change including the sale of her masters (ownership of her first six albums) to investors, a relationship changing or something that affected her reasons for remaining closeted.

Chance of rain

We see Truman sitting at the beach reflecting on how his father drowned when he was a child. As it starts raining he gets up to leave, only to reveal that there's just enough rain to encourage him to get up and go home. We slowly start to see how manufactured these scenarios are. Throughout Truman's week there are planned situations that are designed to test for any changes in his behaviour, like if he's still petrified of the water. These actions reveal just how much pressure they've placed on Truman to prevent him from leaving. It leaves us asking how much free will does he truly have with his choice to stay or go? At this point it feels like the choice has been made for him.

Taylor recreates this rain scene in the 'lavender haze' music video. We see her sitting at the end of the bed with a rain cloud over her head while her lover is asleep. We can infer that Taylor is showing us that she identifies with how isolated Truman was feeling in this moment. Taylor has given up a lot in her personal life for the success of her career, but how much of that was her choice to do so?

Reflecting on the past

Truman goes back home and opens up a trunk full of childhood memories. He's looking at photos of his family while trying to make sense of what he saw with his father still being alive, and the implications of that. This is the beginning of Truman questioning how far those in his life have gone to keep up this lie. If his father is still alive then what else have they lied about?

In the 'cardigan' music video we can see that Taylor is reflecting on her past in a similar way, but this time through playing her piano. Both 'the tortured poets department' album and summation reveal a similar theme of reflection, but with an honest exploration of the agony that comes along with it. "Nostalgia is a mind's trick." This album is a reflection of her career, highlighting the toll it's taken on her personal life along the way.

The one that got away

Love triangles

As Truman pulls out a red cardigan from a plastic bag, we get flashbacks of his high school years. His attention is torn between Sylvia and his current wife, Meryl. During a moment alone with Sylvia they sneak away together, but she appears anxious knowing they don't have much time alone. They share a chaste kiss before Lauren gets dragged away by a man claiming to be her father. She hastily reveals that everything Truman knows about his life is a lie, that it's all done for him and that everyone is watching him. Her father claims that she is just having an episode and reassures Truman by saying that he's taking her to Fiji to receive more help. Sylvia's interaction with Truman is the catalyst for her character being removed from the show. This reveals that even in high school Truman's love interest was planned out for him, despite his attraction to Sylvia.

Taylor wistfully talks about the fictional teenage love triangle during the 'folkmore' set. She describes how James is longing for the one that got away, which seems to contain an element of truth from her past. In 'imgonnagetyouback' she talks about how she won't stop fighting until they're back together again. I tend to lean more museless, with the queer side of Taylor being the one she's fighting for most of all (and with any other muses being secondary to that). If we consider the love triangle from that perspective we can see that the muse she lost was a cherished piece of her history, but the part of herself she lost along the way is the one worth risking everything for to be able to feel whole again.

It's all in the details

Through the development of Sylvia's character we start to see the significance of the colour red. To the viewers at home it is a symbol of heartbreak and loss, and that Truman's attachment to the cardigan is based on his feelings for her. But for Truman we can assume that it is more like a symbol of hope that he might finally be free one day. Other symbols we see her wear include a red seahorse pin (their school mascot) a green bauble bracelet and the 'how's it going to end?' badge. When he reads the badge in the library he quietly admits that he's been wondering that too. This is the earliest insight we witness of Truman not being fulfilled by the life that has been scripted for him.

Many of Taylor's Easter eggs are a reference to the Truman show. These include Sylvia's rose shirt, the eras tour poster, 'karma' door, the song 'how did it end?' and many of her music videos. In the 'lover' music video there's also the bauble earrings, her lover has a seahorse patch on his jacket and the board games are Taylor Swift themed. These all seem like amusing connections until you pick up on the deeper correlations to Truman's story.

Cardigan

After Sylvia left, all Truman is left with is her red cardigan. Sylvia begs Truman to come and find her, but as the flashback ends we find out that Truman didn't follow her to Fiji at the time because his mother got really sick. Instead he settled down and married Meryl, while living with the loss of what could've been with Sylvia. After Truman finishes reminiscing about the past, he slyly reveals that the badge is still pinned onto the cardigan. This reveals that his attachment is not so much to Sylvia now, but to the idea of leaving one day so that he can be free to live his life authentically.

Taylor's song 'cardigan' is one of her most significant references to Truman's story. In the 'cardigan' and 'willow' music video we can see that it is a symbol of the memories she carries from her past and a reminder of what she's left behind along the way. The stars on the cardigan hold a similar sense of hope, just like Truman's pin. "You drew stars around my scars, but now I'm bleedin' 'cause I knew you." This imagery evokes the pain of carving into skin to emphasise the heaviness that comes with sitting with the memory of what could have been.

The bar

After Truman's flashback scene we get a glimpse of commentary from a bar as they're watching the show. This juxtaposition reveals how watching the Truman show is an ordinary occurrence during their daily lives, just like many of us tune in to watch the eras tour on a grainy live stream. The 'delicate' music video ends with Taylor walking into a very similar bar to meet up with a secret admirer, but it remains unclear which one is sitting there waiting for her.

Cracks in the facade

The one worth fighting for

Once the nostalgic moment is over we see Truman holding a photo frame of his wife Meryl. It seems like a loving gesture at first, until he turns it around and opens it up to reveal that he's been collecting a collage of facial features in an attempt to recreate a portrait of Sylvia from memory. This contrast between the memory and Truman's reality exposes how much he has sacrificed along the way by staying in Seahaven. Holding onto the cardigan, pin and picture of Sylvia is an act of defiance when everything else in his life has been decided for him.

Taylor left everything behind when she left her old label, including the ownership of her first six albums. She was not given the option of buying them back without having to commit to producing another album for each one she earned back. Unfortunately this is something many in the industry have had to endure. With hindsight we now know that Taylor was able to rerecord her past albums with added vault tracks, but at the cost of reliving her past. Taylor's back tattoo in the 'you need to calm down' music video conveys that the memory of her life's work was the only memento from her past that she was able to take with her.

Glitches

As Truman is driving to work again, his car radio starts glitching and he ends up on a channel that contains the directions everyone else is hearing in preparation for his arrival before work. From our point of view all of these mishaps are new, but there would have been flaws like this in the system a lot longer than that. But if Truman has known he was the star of the show from the beginning, what was the point of the movie? To reveal the truth to us, and the viewers at home, slowly over time. And to give us a chance to understand his point of view as we prepare for his departure.

We have seen plenty of glitches like this occurring in Taylor's performances on the eras tour, and many of these have been intentional (such as the screens glitching and swallowing bugs). This draws our attention to the cracks in her pop star facade, revealing glimpses of the person she is underneath. And just like Truman, she's giving us the opportunity to slowly adjust to the changes she plans to make in the lead up of what's to come.

Breaking down

Truman appears to be overwhelmed as he starts to reveal just how much of the town he lives in is choreographed around him. This is the start of Truman escalating his reactions to create more cracks in the facade, in the hopes that more viewers begin to see the challenges he faces living in the spotlight.

This purposeful increase in revealing more of the inner versions of themselves is exactly what Taylor is portraying during the 'delicate'' performance on the eras tour. Slowly allowing us to see them as normal people behind the larger than life character they had become in the spotlight. The way Taylor begins creating the cracks on purpose allows us to understand that what's to come is purposely being exposed.

Life's a stage

Truman attempts to enter an elevator, only to discover that it's fake. This is a big step towards seeing what's behind the magician's curtain the first time you watch the movie. When you watch it again this is the point where you start to discover how complex the set of Seahaven has become over time to keep the show running. Many elements of the town act as rest stops and exit points for the actors away from Truman's view.

Taylor pushes down the walls of the bedroom during the 'lavender haze' music video, revealing that the relationship had always been a facade to begin with. Interestingly, this is the only music video that we see begin after the clock ticks over to midnight. Just like Cinderella returns to her original state at midnight, so too does Taylor. This correlation to Cinderella's story implies that the lavender haze we see hidden beyond the walls of the bedroom is the most honest version of Taylor underneath everything else. Lavender is heavily used as a subtle reference by queer people, especially lesbians. Koi fish can be seen in all of the 'midnights' music videos except for 'karma'. They are well known for swimming against the stream, something many neurodivergent people experience feeling. Koi fish are often associated with the yin and yang symbol and together they symbolise balance, courage and perseverance, much like the song 'you're on your own kid'.

Turn up the heat

Invisible

As he seeks out his best friend Marlon for help, we learn that Truman feels concerned that he is being followed or set up for something. Marlon appears calm until Truman mentions that his father is still alive. It appears that this detail may not have been disclosed to the public. Truman demonstrates that everyone in the store is so preoccupied with fulfilling their roles that they will ignore him at all costs. This is a very unnatural reaction and wouldn't be a new discovery for Truman.

The bodyguards in the 'delicate' music video react in a similar way, just like the guards at Buckingham palace are trained to stay focused and ignore distractions. On an emotional level, this behaviour feels like no one is interested in you unless you're wearing the mask of who they expect you to be. "The actors were hitting their marks." Many neurodivergent people experience this disparity between who they are on the inside and the curated version they present for others to see. This act of reflecting back what the viewer wants to see is often done out of necessity to remain safe, but leaves the inner and truest version of oneself feeling invisible. "I want you to know I'm a mirrorball. I'll show you every version of yourself tonight." Unfortunately, you have to participate in their performance if you want to be seen, but the version you they see isn't who you truly are on the inside.

Just for you

After an evening together, Truman is left alone when Meryl offers to take his mother home. As the TV is playing in the background we hear how the presenter is incredibly specific when describing the next episode of 'show me the way to go home'. "Where we learn that you don't have to leave home to discover what the world's all about. And that no one is poor, who has friends." This is a form of subliminal messaging telling Truman that he's better off staying home, implying that there's no point trying to leave because they will prevent him every step of the way.

In the 'lavender have' music video Taylor is watching a similar weather station, but when she gets closer she pulls the screen apart to reveal that there's nothing but space and koi fish behind it. This likeness to Truman's story presents an intriguing insight into the obstacles and road blocks Taylor has faced as a queer woman throughout her career. The koi fish behind the screen also highlight Taylor's determination to challenge the status quo and how she has been working towards much needed change within the music industry.

I do not

Truman is flipping through a photo album full of photos of his family and life with Meryl. His mother stresses her desire for grandkids while she's still alive. Truman continues to look through the album after they leave. The final straw for their relationship comes when he reveals that Meryl had her fingers crossed when they got married, implying she was never fully committed from the beginning. Looking through the photo albums seems to be a weekly routine when his mother visits, so we can assume this wasn't the first time Truman's noticed this detail, the only difference is that he's pointing it out now because it's the next step in his plan to leave Seahaven.

Many of Taylor's music videos emphasise the facade she has played into of the life society expects her to maintain. This has become more evident than ever with her current relationship with Travis Kelce. They want her to fulfil the 1950's lifestyle as a happily married wife with two children, a house with a white picket fence, to stay home each day as a housewife and to serve her husband when he gets home from a long day at the office. 'The man' music video highlights the disparity between these expectations and the lifestyle men are usually celebrated for, so that we can understand that this isn't the life she wants for herself.

Undressed

After Truman attempts to confront his wife about the photo, he follows her to work in his pyjamas. She works at the hospital and claimed to be doing a leg amputation from the elevator incident, a story they made up to explain what he saw the day before. When he locates her within the hospital the actors are forced to begin the procedure to keep up appearances.

Taylor was wearing a corset with a pattern very similar to Truman's pyjamas underneath her blue dress recently while out with Travis Kelce and his friends. Everyone in the group was wearing matching pant and shirt sets, with Brittany Mahomes in actual pyjamas. This may have been a hint that Taylor's beginning to escalate the cracks in the facade of her pop star persona.

The failed escape

Predictable

Truman is sitting in his car when Meryl gets home from working at the hospital. When she gets in, he locks her in the car and attempts to leave town. "Blocked at every turn. Beautifully synchronised, don't you agree?" This is the point where he's revealing that he knows how predictable everyone around him has been, pointing out that the same three people keep going past on schedule.

Logically if Taylor knew what the roadblocks were before she left her old record label, she would have known how her opponents would retaliate after she left. "Blood's thick but nothing like a payroll." It seems likely that they were planning to sabotage her once she left, with her first album in particular. If they were predictable enough, Taylor could've had time to plan ahead to mitigate the damage done to her career. This could include holding back on releasing certain songs, which has now lead to the rumours of 'lover' vault tracks.

Just like clockwork

Truman begins to drive around the round about over and over again to highlight that he has figured out that the townspeople move around him like clockwork, but again this isn't new information to Truman. The director's attempts to prevent him from leaving are incredibly predictable and they always have been. Truman would have been able to pick up on this pattern when he was still in high school, if not earlier. "When you're young they assume you know nothing." The benefit of them being this predictable is that Truman could foresee their reactions and blindside them when they least expected it.

Taylor uses many clocks throughout her music videos as easter eggs and to draw our attention to time and dates that might be relevant in the future. One element of interest is the concept of routine and the predictability that comes with that. The arena in 'the hunger games catching fire' seems to be inspired by the Truman show as well. Katniss figured out that there are new threats in each segment that changed on the hour, ending with a lightning strike at noon and midnight. This kind of predictability allows one to plan in advance. Three years perhaps?

Planned to fail

After driving around in circles Truman claims that they're headed to Atlantic City, only to find out that the end of their street is blocked up with traffic. He concedes to going back home after all, just to announce suddenly that he has changed his mind. As Truman doubles back and attempts to leave for the second time, he discovers that the traffic jam had magically cleared up after they left. He was accurate in predicting that his plan to leave would be counteracted by some form of intervention. Truman's actions are forcing the director to reveal his hand, only to call his bluff and get further than the director expected him to. And despite her fear, Meryl is still putting on a performance for the camera here too.

It's a possibility that Taylor set up a similar scenario to unfold with the release of her 'lover' album. The contrast between the aesthetic and themes of the 'reputation' and 'lover' albums could have been done on purpose to blur the lines between the two in an attempt to mitigate the damage done from being sabotaged. Underneath the vindictive theme of 'reputation' was the romantic songs her opponents had been anticipating from the 'lover' album.

The bridge

Truman stalls at the bridge due to his fear of water but forces Meryl to drive across while his eyes are closed, willing to do whatever it takes to leave. "We're over the bridge!" he exclaims when they make it across. As Truman continues to escape, they are still faced with roadblock after roadblock. The escape plan eventually fails when the road is blocked because of a leak at the nuclear plant. They thank the officer for his help but when the officer says "you're welcome, Truman" he runs away from the car in a panic, but is quickly captured and returned home again.

Taylor draws attention to the bridges of her songs at the very beginning of the eras tour because they are the most authentic lyrics in all of her discography. She often begins a song with a very optimistic perspective, only to end with the most brutally honest observations of her experiences in hindsight. Taylor has told us that she tells lies. In 'love story' the lie is that she's singing about being in love with Romeo. When the perspective changes during the bridge, she's being honest when she describes being in love with Juliet and wanting to marry her. In 'lavender haze' we hear how stifling it's become to continue hiding her truth. "The only girl they see is a one night or a wife. I find it dizzying, they're bringin' up my history. But you aren't even listening." If we don't listen to what Taylor is saying during the bridges, we are avoiding her truth.

The turning point

What was once lost

When they return home Truman confronts Meryl, but she calls out for help and Marlon arrives with beer. Meryl leaps into his arms crying as he comforts her, but he's looking at Truman when he says "everything's going to be okay, it's all going to be fine." The next scene cuts to Truman and Marlon sitting at the end of an unfinished bridge together as Truman begins to tell Marlon what he's been through. "Maybe I'm losing my mind, but it feels like the whole world revolves around me somehow." Marlon replies by saying "The last thing that I would ever do is lie to you. I mean, think about it Truman. If everybody is in on it... I'd have to be in on it, too." The screen cuts to the director feeding him the lines but we can also see that Marlon has been as honest as he could be within his role on the show. To placate Truman and encourage him to stay, he is reunited with his father who he hasn’t seen for 22 years. Truman seems apprehensive about the reunion, but Marlon encourages him to go along with it.

In the 'willow' music video Taylor enters a glass display case and starts performing for the crowd of an old fashioned circus. As her lover approaches for the first time they reunite through the glass pane but it feels like the glass was intentional to keep them apart, despite their intentions to be together again. This imagery is echoed over and over again throughout Taylor's music videos and the eras tour. We can interpret this as a visual representation of being closeted in plain sight or as a form of protecting something that's delicate. Judging by the way they all end up shattered in the end, they seem to be foretelling what's still to come.

Test run

Truman was never really planning on leaving the first time because he had planned to fail. There are a few benefits of acting in this way. Firstly, we know that Truman had never crossed the bridge before and his attempt forced the director to play his hand by revealing what obstacles were ahead if this was his exit route. Enacting his bigger plan before seeing what was ahead would mean that he's more likely to fail if he crosses the bridge while under prepared for what is on the other side. Secondly, if everyone has assumed that he has failed, they won't see his bigger plan coming if they believe he's feeling defeated. They placated Truman by reuniting him with his father, but that backfired on them when he escaped when they least expected it.

Taylor mentions that "Every bait and switch was a work of art" in 'mastermind'. I wasn't sure if I was using this term correctly when search results were full of business examples and psychologists were linking it with the act of gaslighting, but the type of bait and switch I was intrigued by is akin to a chess move. This type of move is often referred to as the 'queen sacrifice'. By purposely leaving the queen unguarded, your opponent is lured into the trap, only to be met with a devastating counter attack. This, and the element of a trial run before the big reveal, is what lead me to consider that the 'lover' album may have been used as bait for the sale of her masters. If she alluded to coming out straight away to entice the sale that was going to happen anyway, that obstacle wouldn't get in the way of her bigger plan. (It is not my intention to imply that this theory is true, so this is just a hypothetical option in favour of the bigger picture.) If this was a prelude for a bigger plan, it still would have been extremely devastating when it did happen.

The show must go on

This is the turning point in the movie when we begin to see Truman's life from the directors point of view. "An entire human life recorded on an intricate network of hidden cameras, and broadcast live and unedited 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to an audience around the globe." We start to find out how they had to manufacture ways to keep Truman on the island. His father dying played a big part of that, but to the viewers it's just another plot twist in the show they've been watching for entertainment. They have 5,000 cameras around Seahaven now, but started off with just one before he was born and they've been watching Truman's life unfold ever since. "We accept the reality of the world with which we are presented." This is the director's response as to why Truman has never left Seahaven or found out about the show. This contradicts everything we've seen from Truman's point of view. Just because he could leave doesn't mean he could leave freely. How much harder does he have to try before the director will let him go? He goes on to explain that with Meryl's decision to leave the show, a new love interest will be introduced and he has hopes for the first on air conception to occur. It's evident that Truman leaving would derail the directors plans for the show going forward.

Taylor has described how writing a song is like sucking the snake venom out of a bite. Expressing herself creates distance between the heaviness of what she's experienced and I believe this is why she sees herself as the narrator (or director) of her discography at times. During the 'folkmore' set on the eras tour she describes herself as the narrator of the teenage love triangle. It's also common for Taylor to be more than one character at once. At the end of 'the man' music video we discover Taylor is the director, and then it's revealed that Taylor was also the male actor that had been wearing a disguise. This implies that Taylor is James in the love triangle and based on the evolution of her speech, we can infer that as the director she chose Betty in the end. This feels like a clue that we should consider that she has been showing us her version of events from different perspectives all along.

The doll house

Everything on the show is for sale, including their wardrobe, food products and dollhouse style versions of the homes they live in. These elements are jarring after seeing the level of animosity Truman was experiencing with each road block he faced. It feels like they've overstepped a boundary by consuming every detail of Truman's life.

In the 'lover' music video, we first see the lover house is within a snow globe and our first shot of Taylor is through the peephole. The couple dancing throughout the house seem to be sharing a romantic moment, but the entire experience feels voyeuristic. No rooms are off limits as we see them in the bathroom swimming inside of a fish bowl. "Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close, forever and ever?" plays at the same time. It feels like we're asking that of her. It becomes uncomfortable to realise how much we want to have access to every detail of her life.

Back to normal

Headquarters

Not only is Seahaven contained within a dome, the director and his control centre is housed within the moon structure. From the interview with the director we can ascertain that he doesn't usually reveal this much behind the scenes, but the return of Truman's father required some damage control.

The vault in the 'I can see you' music video is reminiscent of the moon shaped structure the director worked out of. The connection between these and the overall theme of the music video reminds me of the scene in 'the hunger games mockingjay' where they rescue Peeta from the capitol, only to find out he was trained to attack Katniss. This scene has an eerily similar asylum vibe like the 'fortnight' music video as well.

The mask

The next morning we go back to Truman in the bathroom again, as if he's just started another regular day. He seems cheerful as he's using a bar of soap to draw an alien outline on the mirror, while at the same time implying that he feels alienated in real life. This facade of normalcy he is presenting after his plan had failed is on purpose to lull the director into a false sense of security. If everyone thinks he has given up and believes he is resigned to staying after all, nobody would see his final escape plan coming.

Just like Taylor showed us with the visuals of the delicate performance on the eras tour, the mask is breakable. Now that we know that Taylor is the one breaking down the facade herself, it becomes harmful to refuse to see Taylor for who she really is underneath the pop star persona. And just like with Truman leaving in the end, Taylor has shown us that she's choosing herself now, regardless of the consequences. So we can either choose to join her, or sit back in defiance until she walks away.

Back to work

As Truman returns to the office it becomes more obvious where all of the cameras have been hidden in plain sight. They're everywhere, including inside his pencil sharpener. But the least obvious camera is the one Truman is wearing, his wedding ring. This came from his father, something he purposely gave to Truman as he was supposedly drowning. He never took it off because it was a reminder of what he had lost at such a young age. Truman was able to escape in the end because he took the ring off and left it behind. They had no way of tracking him if he wasn't wearing it. In hindsight we can see that Meryl's necklace also contained a camera that was used frequently.

If all of the moon and black holes references are a codeword for cameras or surveillance in the Truman show, we can consider that Taylor has used them in her music videos in a similar way. 'The man' music video begins with a similar office scene with a man who is charming and magnetic, but the wink at the camera implies that he's also putting on a performance. At the end of a work call Truman mentions that "life is fragile" after he's introduced to his new love interest. Just like Truman's comment, Taylor has used the word delicate to to describe the fine line between the brittle nature of the facade and how easily it could all fall apart, like what occurs during the 'delicate' performance.

This place is mine

After Meryl left, Truman moved down to the basement. This is the only room in the house that contained anything that was truly personal to Truman with his padlocked chest of mementos and remnants of old hobbies. But on top of all this it was also the room with the least amount of cameras, making it the perfect place to hide.

In the 'lover' music video the only space that is personal to Taylor is the attic, and it’s just like Truman's basement as both rooms are typically used for storage. If you look closely you can see a familiar trunk to the side as she's reminiscing over old pictures on a projector. On the eras tour the only real piece of the lover house is the attic seen throughout the 'folkmore' set, the rest was burnt away on screen and ever since the setlist changed it has been falling over instead. This change reveals that it was a facade all along, similar to how we begin to see behind the scenes half way through the Truman show.

The escape route

The map

Truman's desire to travel to Fiji is heavily featured as Truman's motivation for leaving Seahaven. There's evidence of this throughout the basement, including a large map of the island. Was this really his dream destination? No. Talking about going to Fiji encouraged the director to reveal his endeavours to prevent him from leaving. If Truman was constantly being challenged with his fear of the water, he was also being exposed to potential exit routes and obstacles. Truman's desires to go to Fiji was a facade to masquerade his true intentions of plotting his escape without raising suspicions.

One of Taylor's latest songs explores wanting to escape to 'Florida!' and reflects Truman's dreams of moving to Fiji. Another map Taylor has shown us in her music videos is the man wall. It's seen as a road map for her future rerecords with the end goal of coming out as queer, similar to what Elton John did at the peak of his career. Now that we can see that Truman revealed his dreams to travel as a means of testing his opponent, we can begin to understand that Taylor may have used her attempts to come out as queer in a similar way. If Taylor had expressed her intentions to come out of the closet behind the scenes, she would have been reminded of the challenges she would face if she did so. We see a small portion of this scenario play out with political discussions during the 'Miss Americana' documentary.

Behind the curtain

The director is concerned about Truman being asleep in the basement so Marlon is sent to investigate. When he arrives he finds a decoy in the bed and a tape recorder of Truman snoring. As he searches the rest of the basement, he pulls back the map to reveal what's inside the closet. This is the moment everyone discovers that Truman has escaped and that the map of Fiji was a disguise for his master plan all along.

The man wall is the most fundamental Easter egg for many Swifties, with endless theories on how to decode it. But what if the biggest Easter egg of all is actually set up as a trap to draw our attention in, so that we become so focused on it's significance that we don't notice the bigger picture? The subway wall is made up of small square tiles, with Taylor Swift themed posters and the rerecords written with spray paint over the top to mimic graffiti. But if you look even closer still, you will see that there's also a crack down the middle of the man wall map. This suggests that there's something hidden behind it, just like with Truman's map.

The tunnel

When Marlon opens the closet in the basement, we discover that Truman had dug a hole through the ceiling and this is how he escaped. Marlon climbs up the stepladder and we see his head pop out of the hole in the garden. We could assume Truman began digging this hole after Meryl left because we can see he left behind the same multi tool that she advertised in the beginning, but he was in the middle of digging in the same spot when she came home that day. All we had seen was an awkward shot of Truman from behind as he was working in the garden bed. Truman also purposely left patches of grass unmowed so he had an excuse to be frequently working on the old lawn mower in the basement, something that was quickly replaced once Meryl left.

The ending of the 'delicate' music video is what sparked this deep dive into the Truman show. I discovered that the bar Taylor enters is called the gopher, an animal famous for digging holes underground. This unexpected connection to Truman's method of escape was unbelievable after picking up on many of Taylor's hints towards a departure.

The trap door

If Truman had been digging a tunnel in the garden from the beginning, how did he get away with it? He disguised the hole by filling it with balls and rocks in just the right size that were painted to look like garden ornaments. This is echoed in the scene where Truman is telling Marlon about how he wants to go to Fiji. Marlon asks if Fiji is near Florida, so Truman demonstrates with a golf ball to show that it's practically on the other side of the world. The way Truman is describing it implies that the tunnel is hidden on both sides in a place where the cameras can't find it, and all that's left now is to plan his escape route.

Taylor’s version of Truman’s golf ball is the painted nails aligned with the 2 and 8 on the karma coffee cup, pointing to where her journey through the tunnel starts and finishes. Other ball shaped references include the pearl coloured balls floating around Ice Spice in the 'karma' music video, the golden orbs in the 'willow' music video and the tennis balls in 'the man' music video. When Taylor attempts to leave the glass case in the 'willow' music video, she finds it has been boarded up. She tries to find a way out through the glass, only to reveal that she knew that there was a trap door underneath her feet the entire time. We hear the lyrics "I come back stronger than a 90's trend" at the exact same time Taylor goes down the tunnel. And which trend is she referencing? The Truman show, of course.

Leave everything behind

Cut transmission

Once the director had realised that Truman had really escaped, he was left with no choice but to cut transmission on the live broadcast for the first time since the show began. Panic ensues for the viewers who didn't see this coming, meanwhile we see Sylvia watching from home in anticipation. Ratings for the show are at an all time high as everyone at home waits to find out what happened to Truman.

It's interesting that Taylor drew inspiration from this loading screen for the eras tour poster considering it's a reference to the moment Truman escaped. It draws a very clear parallel to his story, implying that what we're watching on the eras tour is the Taylor version of the Truman show.

Lost at sea

It's unclear how long Truman had after he escaped before the search party started. At first it seemed possible that Marlon left the car door open when he arrived for Truman to escape, but it's more likely he was just in too much of a hurry. It' seems 's likely Truman had some time to escape on his bike undetected. His fear of water meant checking the ocean would be the last place they would think to look for him, which is exactly what happened.

This moment after Taylor entered the bar in the 'delicate' music video reveals a sense of clarity just before she opens up her eyes. The ending of Taylor's story is yet to happen, but from what she's said throughout the tour, she's not planning on slowing down anytime soon.

The note

As Truman sails off we see him pull a note out of his pocket. All he took with him was the collage picture of Sylvia. This symbol of hope for his future was the only thing he took with him. "The only thing that's left is the manuscript, one last souvenir from my trip to your shores."

When Taylor left behind her life's work and started over by herself, she carried a picture of the one that mattered most with her when she left as well. If you look close enough at the man wall, you can see a polaroid shaped outline underneath the black karma letters, as if something that was once there had been taken away. Just like Truman's collage picture, this missing piece represents the secret note from the 'delicate' music video. The one piece of evidence that meant something to them, when so much of their lives were full of half truths and lies. And what's on the polaroid picture? Proof that Taylor is queer... "Like a rainbow with all of it's colours."

It's time to go

Almost drowned

Once they locate Truman as he's escaping on the boat, the director utilises his power to create a storm to derail Truman's attempt to escape. When his first attempts to force Truman to turn back fail, he orders the workers in the control room to hit the boat with the largest wave with to intentionally capsize the boat. They object to risking Truman's life, but the director goes ahead anyway. The wave overturns the boat and Truman almost drowns. As the director escalated his attempts to make Truman stay, it became clear that he would rather let Truman die than watch him leave if he refuses to stay. This highlights how unethical the director's attachment to Truman and the show had become over the years.

In the 'cardigan' music video we see Taylor clinging to her piano in the ocean, just like Truman did with his boat. This shows her determination to fight for her future despite the cost. The trap door Taylor escaped out of in the 'willow' music video is just like the exit points under the stage of the eras tour. Taylor's most iconic exit is after the surprise songs when she dives into the stage. Her character then swims against the current just like Truman did and when she reemerges again it's for the beginning of the 'lavender haze' set.

The getaway boat

Despite the director's attempts, Truman recovers from the storm and sails far enough that his boat crashes into the side of the dome wall. Truman managed to escape Seahaven after a lot of planning, but I think he had some help along the way. If Marlon was aiding Truman's escape plans, he would have been a crucial liaison behind the scenes. Throughout the interview with the director we get a glimpse of Sylvia and find out that her home is full of anti the Truman show propaganda. These include pictures of cast members that could be open to joining their side, with Marlon listed as being their best bet. It's possible the protestors worked together to smuggle Truman's father into Seahaven to encourage Truman to leave. One of the posters shows a young Truman in what appears to be a pizza themed clown costume. Pizza is mentioned a few times by the control centre workers and by the security guards of a car garage. This could be the common factor connecting the protestors helping Truman escape, as well as providing an inconspicuous meet up place to swap information that wouldn't draw attention.

Just like Truman had help, Taylor had a team working together in the 'I can see you' music video. This depicts an alternate view of Truman's escape, with a team breaking in from the outside to rescue Taylor from the vault. Many of the guest appearances in Taylor's music videos are representing the other side of Taylor, more so than any particular muse. Many of the scenes featuring Ice Spice in the 'karma' music video also mimic the ending of the Truman show.

The stairs

Truman found the stairs that lead to the door and is so close to leaving behind the only place he's known. All of this is unfolding because Truman reached a point where his own wellbeing was more important than the character he had been portraying for the audience. Sylvia warned him in the beginning that everyone was watching him. This would have confirmed any suspicions Truman already had and lead to a life of being on high alert knowing he was being monitored at all times.

Both the public and private sides of Taylor have experienced the same restrictions over time, forced to keep a large part of her life hidden from others at all times. The scene with the moon and Saturn implies that an alternative ending to Truman's story is in store for Taylor. The moon was the home of the control centre watching over Truman day and night. Capturing the moon and Saturn in the 'karma' music video suggests that both sides of Taylor have worked together to reclaim the role of director, and are now working together to rewrite their story so that they can reunite and move forward together.

Captive

Finally in a last ditch effort to persuade Truman to stay, the director talks to Truman for the first time. It's clear the director has grown attached to Truman to the point that he doesn't see Truman beyond the character he's crafted over the years, but he only sees the public persona of Truman. The director is pleading for Truman to stay, to let the show continue as it is and claims that he knows Truman better than he knows himself. "You've never had a camera in my head!" is the only thing Truman says in defence. This sentence epitomises everything Truman has experienced living in Seahaven. After all, he was wondering when it was going to end when he was still in school. If the director truly knew what was best for Truman, he would have ended the show years ago.

When Truman told the director that you can't see inside my head, we can assume Taylor is trying to say that we can't see inside her heart. During the 'Me!' music video Brendon Urie opens a heart shaped door that reveals what's inside his heart. This implies that the music video revealed what was in Taylor's heart from the beginning. "When it's like, "me-ee-ee," it's like dancers, cats, gay pride, people in country western boots. I start riding a unicorn, like just everything that makes me me." This is how she describes the music video during the 'Miss Americana' documentary. "And for a fortnight there, we were forever." I believe this is a reference to the fourteen songs on her 'debut' album. Her first and potentially most authentic album is full of songs she wrote before she became famous. And then beginning with 'fearless', Taylor actively added in male muses to her songs to camouflage her queer identity. Unfortunately this was also the beginning of the gap between her public and private life growing apart. Looking back we can see that despite the pain this caused, she never lost hope of reuniting them again.

How did it end?

The final bow

The Truman show challenges our perception of how ethical it is to have such unobstructed access to Truman’s life. We’re left questioning if our entertainment was worth the price he was paying by spending his whole life living in the spotlight. He bows for the audience watching at home and ends with one final “Good morning! And incase I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening and good night!” before he turns and walks through the door. The director was left with a look of disgust as he realised Truman had been preforming for the audience all along. Those who had seen the signs watched on with anticipation and those that didn’t were left feeling shocked and confused.

At the end of a theatre performance, the cast will come back on stage one last time to give their final bow of the night as the audience applauds the performance they've just witnessed. We then have to consider that Truman and Taylor's final bow was an acknowledgement of the fact that they had been putting on a performance the entire time. Just like in 'the manuscript', "looking backwards might be the only way to move forward." Going back through Taylor's history and finding the bread crumbs she left along the way will help us understand that the queer version of Taylor had always been there, we just had to know what we were looking for to be able to see it.

The door

As he steps through the door we wait in fervent anticipation to see how Truman's story ends, only to watch as the credits start rolling without an epilogue. This feels frustrating when we had been hoping to see Truman and Sylvia reunite after many years. Instead, this kind of ending is encouraging us to go back to the beginning and reconsider the story through a new lens after learning about how it ended. Each time you rewatch it you can pick up on the deeper layers of the story, seeing more evidence of Truman's discomfort from living an inauthentic life, and how much determination it required to overcome the challenges he faced along the way. Any further explanation would have diluted the magnitude of the moment Truman felt free for the first time in his life. Just being able to walk through the door in the end was the ultimate accomplishment.

The story Taylor has been showing us was never a revelation of her muses, but a slow unravelling of her experience as a famous person who has had very little privacy throughout her life. She's giving us a peak behind the curtain and allowing us to see who she really is beyond the larger than life character we've all built her up to be. And whether we like it or not, she choosing herself now above all else.

The only difference between Taylor and Truman’s story is that Taylor’s not leaving, she’s simply just stepping out of the closet.

Meet me at midnight?

After turning a pumpkin into a carriage and creating a fancy dress to wear, the fairy godmother forewarns Cinderella before she leaves for the ball.

“You must understand, my dear. On the stroke of 12, the spell will be broken, and everything will be as it was before.”

The same is true for Taylor.

No matter how much she accomplishes in the spotlight, she is always going to be the truest version of herself underneath the layers of her pop star persona.

"Dear reader, will you still want me when I'm nothing new?"

When the clock strikes midnight, are you still going to want Taylor when you can finally see who she really is underneath?

Who she has been all along?

"A pathological people pleaser who only wanted you to see her."

A tortured poet,

Kylie x

🧡

#taylorswift #the eras tour #the truman show #Taylor Swift the Truman show #gaylor #🎃 anon #taylor swift music video analysis #taylor swift eras #meet me at midnight #friends of dorothea

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tubasmiracle · 1 month ago

Text

Merry Christmas

Pairing: Soobin x y/n

Genre: Pure fluff ♡⁠(⁠>⁠ ⁠ਊ⁠ ⁠<⁠)⁠♡

Word count: 900 (approx.)

Author's note: it's almost Christmas time, it's not celebrated here but I like the vibes. This is my first, like very very first, proper oneshot, I like it, it's not the best, but it can't be anyway, what's important is I like it hehe. If you want to say something, anything, you are free to drop that in my inbox or dms! Let me know how you like it please!! I would love some feedback!

Song for this:

------------------------------------------------

The end of December was in full effect. People were swarming the streets; after all, it was Christmas Eve. Who wouldn't? Through the glass windows of the shop, one could see the television channels advertising and wishing everyone a Merry Christmas, chiming bells, and singing carols; it was all so beautiful. Soobin was taking it all in, as much as he could, relishing in the festivity of Christmas, refreshing his mind and eyes after a few long months of relentless hard work.

There he saw, in the corner of his eye, a stranger, running as fast as they could amid the crowd and the snow falling. They went into the telephone box, hastily dialling a number, though were their hands shivering? It was not working so well; he could not tell; they were wearing red gloves. This scene was kind of interesting, and being a little nosy would not hurt anyone, right? So, he went closer, keeping a respectful distance. Like the stranger he was, he realized it was a girl, first of all, and she was dressed up prettily. He was reminded of the Red Riding Hood movie actress.

He could see that, despite her desperate manner of trying to call, it was not working; her eyes were now looking outside the box and met Soobin. She gestured for him to come to her and asked, "I am sorry, but my hands are injured; could you please make a call for me? I am y/n."

"Yeah, yeah, sure. I am Soobin." Soobin said and took the telephone handle.

"983-4-738219," y/n recited.

Instead of a ring or a pick-up, he heard the on-hold music.

"this cold season you are the only warmth

You're the comfort, we fall in, fall in love

Over the white snow that settled silently

Our hands almost brushing

Taking one step another step my heart races this Christmas"

as good as the song was, he tried calling the person 2-3 times more, but to no avail. He told y/n, "I am sorry, but whoever this is, is not picking up."

"Oh, she is not?" she said with a disappointed look on her face. "Yeah, what might be the case? If you want to answer obviously." Soobin asked.

"Ah well, in the nearby theater, Home Alone is being released again. My friend and I, who have loved this movie growing up, won two tickets for this movie in the lottery club, but it looks like she won't be able to come."

"Home Alone?? Oh my God, I love that movie!" Soobin said out of excitement.

"Do you?" y/n asked, now wide-eyed.

"Yes!" Soobin said. Y/n knows one when she sees one; he was as much of a fan of the movie as she was. "Then, do you want to go watch the movie with me?" Y/n asked.

"Can I?" Soobin asked, hopefully with an apprehensive look in his eyes.

"Yup, there is still some time left; how about a warm drink? Hot cocoa is what I am saying. Shall we?" Y/n asked, glancing at her watch.

"Yes, yes, why not!"

Y/n and Soobin began walking along the pavement path, two feet apart, understandably. Looking around, eyes wandering, taking in the frozen but cosy beauty of it all.

"So, what do you do?" Y/n asked, breaking the ice and stepping on the snow.

"I am a psychologist." Soobin said, scratching his neck.

"Psychologist you say??" Y/n asked, "It's my first time meeting and talking to one! So, how is it? You know, being a psychologist?"

"It's good, it's really good, it was my dream to be one. It's rewarding, tiring at times, but I did rather be tired through this work than anything else." Soobin said, adorning a sweet grin.

"Wow, it must be really good!" Y/n said, "For me, I am a student, a Science Major with honors in Zoology."

"Aw, how is it for you?" Soobin asked, his disposition was one of an interested person.

"I love it!! Zoology was something I came to love, it's so fun for me! I get to learn so many things and just. It's dynamic!" Y/n geeked out.

As the couple was chatting away excitedly, they reached their location, a cozy cafe.

they entered, the cafe had a comforting, warm & cozy ambience, the complete opposite of the outside temperature. They went on the find the table on the window side.

They both ordered hot chocolate with whipped cream on top and talked while their drinks were being prepared, they found out that a lot of their interests matched, like favourites, likes, dislikes etc. even their appearance, a bit, they both resembled a cute bunny.

As their drinks came, y/n took out a disposable camera from her bag, she clicked a photo with hot chocolate and the outside by side. And a few more of each other.

Having finished their drinks now, y/n said "Soobin, I think it's about time, let's go to the movies!"

"Oh okay!"

This time, as they went, they were closer, no more feets apart. For the two young souls, the coldness and numbness of the outside world were in no comparison to the warmth their hearts were feeling. Ultimately, it was a Christmas they will never forget, and will look back at for a long succession of years to come.

#txt fluff #txt imagines #txt scenarios #soobin x reader #soobin x y/n #txt soobin #soobin x you #txt fanfic #txt x y/n #txt ff #SoundCloud #txt imagine #txt fics

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your-nanas-house · 1 year ago

Note

hi dear, I just got another idea about Robert Fisher and his coquette girlfriend🎀

Hello, darling! LOVELY, just watched the perfect movie today and damn... I got another one with Cillian X coquette girlfriend as well. Can't wait to start writing it. 🙇🏼‍♀️💕

Unwritten

◇ Pairing: Robert Fischer x coquette girlfriend!Reader

◇ Warnings: FLUFF, love, Robert is a puppy in love, spoilers of the movie "Anyone but you", didn't went into details with the coquette style of Y/n but I will in the next fic

◇ Summary: Y/n is smitten with the last movie she saw and Robert makes the best of the situation.

◇ Note: Sorry for the mistakes and the English. It's purely based/inspired on "Anyone but you"... watched it today and damn... my tiny heart. 😭 Also credits to the owners for the pics I found on Pinterest.

(This is the song, I listened it in loop while writing this quickly)

Robert's girlfriend had been singing the same song on repeat for almost three weeks, talking about and comparing the things that happened in their daily routine with the movie she went to see with her friends one Friday night.

The business man wasn't bothered by this, he found it very amusing... especially because Y/n was so cute when she did it.

She had a secret pass that allowed her to do everything with him, being always forgiven because of how adorable she was.

It was always like that, since they started dating.

The song had almost become their song, it echoed softly in Robert's head when he least expected it... even during work meetings.

And it all kept bringing him back to the cute image of his girlfriend dancing around the house in her pink dresses, little bows adorning her hair and beautiful smile plastered on her pretty face.

She was so cute and devoted to that movie that it was a must for him to watch it as well so that he could understand better what she kept rambling about with big adoring eyes and her tiny pout decorated by lip glosses.

Just a couple of days after Robert managed to watch the movie Y/n was so smitten of, an idea crossed his mind.

It was since months now that he wanted to says the scary three words that people say when they are in a relationship and just feel those awesome but worrying butterflies in the stomach.

He just needed to find the right moment.. and what better moment than one created for her... based on the film.

That was Robert’s plan and the main reason he was waiting at the port, checking his watch while waiting for Y/n. After they had a lovely evening, ate dinner at a delicious restaurant and just spent time together before going for a walk and end the night with a romantic ride on a yacht with the moon in the sky smiling at them.

The date was just going perfectly, Robert couldn’t stop watching Y/n who was now standing at the bow... a soft smile on her face as the soft wind caressed her skin, moving her baby pink dress in a dreamlike way.

Her hair were moving slowly as well, making it seem like she just walked out of a perfume advertising even though Y/n was secretly trying not to gag because of her hair going anywhere they wanted.

She slowly turned around to see where her Robert was, a bright smile on her face so big that would have melted anyone... the australian man as well since his stomach was already filled with butterflies and his legs felt like jelly... Weak enough to make him loose balance and fall in the water of the sea.

As the water surrounded his body, the rational part of him woke up again... thoughts of how stupid the plan was crossed his mind but quickly left as soon as he felt two hands grab him and bring him back to surface.

His baby blue eyes met Y/n's as soon as he could open them and a shock of pure love hit his whole body.

She really just jumped off the yachts to "save" him.. ruining her pretty dress and makeup for him.

Robert was too stunned and dazed to realize what she was doing, coming back to reality just when she made sure he was on the floating buoy before climbing on it as well.

Her face was flushed and her look of worry was quite evident.. her whole state was noticeable and Robert was feeling a bit guilty for what he did.. hoping silently that it was worth it.

"Oh my god, baby. Are you okay?" Y/n asked quickly, fixing his hair before stroking his wet, cold cheeks in an attempt to calm herself and him.

Her mouth opened again to ask him another question after he just stared at her, not answering her question; but before she could do that the man opted for leaning in and kiss her.

Their lips molding together perfectly, fitting like the last pieces of a puzzle, till the rescue helicopter approached, warning them before throwing the harnesses.

As they both put them on and jumped off the buoy, their body pressed together, her arms went quickly around his neck as his hands grabbed her hips tightly and protectively.

The robe kept being pulled up while they hang on the water, an amazing and romantic view surrounding them... not that they could really see it since Y/n was holding her eyes tightly close, adrenaline and anxiety filling her body, while Robert could just stare at her with love.

That's when he took a deep breath and started to sing the song just like in the movie, his eyes never leaving her face.

Feel the rain on your skin

No one else can feel it for you

Only you can let it in

No one else, no one else

His singing skills weren't so good but the pure shock and surprise that appeared on Y/n's face was enough to smooth his nervousness a bit so that he could continue to sing the song while waiting for her to join.

Can speak the words on your lips

Drench yourself in words unspoken

Live your life with arms wide open

Today is where your book begins

The rest is still unwritten

Their soft laughters interrupted the lyrics, their noses kept brushing softly against each other as they both kept giggling till they died down.

Robert's forehead pressed softly against hers as he fixed her pink wet bow before meeting her eyes again... his hand traveling slowly down on her cheek, his thumb caressing her cold skin in a tender way in an attempt to gather the courage to finally speak.

"Y/n..." He started, brushing his finger against her bottom lip softly while he stared directly in her loving eyes

"I.. I love you".

Taglist:

@gabile18 , @mrsfullbuster500 , @rex-ray , @elizamalfoyy, @eovjjj , @monkeyking-and-liuer-mate , @jeremiah-va1eska , @gothamchic16, @rabbiteggz , @dieg0brandos-wife , @rottenecstasy , @lazyexcuse , @teh-vampire-bunny , @lobotomy-lover , @slasher-smasher , @sleepycreativewriter , @mrkdvidal1989

#robert fischer x you #robert fischer fic #robert fischer x reader #robert fischer x y/n #robert fischer #cillian fic #cillian fanfic #cillian fluff #cillian murphy fanfic #cillian murphy fic #cillian murphy #cillian murphy x you #cillian murphy x y/n #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy fanfiction #cillian murphy fluff #inception #inception fanfiction

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whats-9plus10 · 1 year ago

Text

Venture Bros.: Radiant is the Blood of the Baboon Heart commentary and extras.

This is what I gathered during my first watch. Hopefully, I'll be able to upload the audio bits like I did for seasons 1-7 eventually! I'll catch all the little details then 💛

Let me get this out of the way. They did not answer the most important question of all.

In the past, Doc and Jackson have said that what they say in the commentary isn't necessarily canon. What is canon is what's in the actual show, not what they explore outside of the show because they're always changing their minds. Sometimes they disagreed while answering questions. Take that as you'd like.

Jonas didn’t abandon The Monarch after the plane crash intentionally. He assumed he died or he ran away before he got there. They hinted that Jonas downed the plane himself.

When asked if Jonas loved Rusty they say he’s a bad person, the villain of the show, and a monster. Jackson thinks he might have been a boy adventurer himself. They compare him to baby boomers forcing their children to live the lives they wanted themselves.

Does Rusty have the other twin killed when only one dies? Jackson says only when they witness the death. He referenced Ice Station Impossible. Brock has done it before.

Ritchie Valens refused to join The Guild and Red Mantle and Dragoon’s (Buddy Holly and The Big Bopper) initiation was to kill him so he wouldn’t tattle.

Doc says the second sons are the ones who succeed in The Guild, not the first sons, because they’re most likely to become evil and that’s why Dean was chosen as The Guild’s successor.

Doc described two episodes he would like to do: 1. "Heads in the water." Which is the heads of characters bobbing in the water after a crash for the entire episode. An all dialog bottle episode. 2. An episode that starts off like a regular Venture Bros episode. Then a henchman dies and everything pivots. 21 calls his wife and says “Real sorry but your husband died in service” (Doc put on his 21 voice here). We then see the wife and daughter (from another marriage) and follow them in their lives.

What is The Monarch's favorite ABBA song? Doc thinks Waterloo and Jackson thinks Take a Chance. They riff as Monarch and Dr. Girlfriend for a few seconds.

Gary's a big Sneaker Pimps fan.

Rusty doesn't have a middle name. If you ask Rusty he'll say the S stands for sexy or science or SUPER science. Rusty’s favorite musical is Starlight Express or RENT (Jackson disagreed). He's never actually watched them but he likes the advertisements.

Brock Frog is the guy that "brings in bagels". A 3rd generation Italian American from "bricklayer stock." He fell out with his dad because he wanted to bring bricks into the future. He teamed up with Professor Vigo Dale, who screwed him out of half of the company after Brick Frog gave him all of his brick ideas.

Mantilla has the ability to make things invisible by touching them but claimed it was teleportation. “It’s all bullshit…and she had money from her past”

Mantilla has been "garbage picking" from The Monarch’s trash, such as Dr. Mrs.'s costume ideas in season 3 that she had thrown away and their wedding invitation.

The guys in the warehouse with Jefferson were all roommates in the 90s.

We would have had a full episode of Force Majeure and Jonas Venture's rivalry.

We would have had another episode of Billy and Colonel Gentleman "John Wicking" after Mischa was found dead right before a doggy costume contest.

Matt Berry was supposed to voice Force Majeure.

Why does The Monarch hate Doc so much? Jackson says “Obviously it (the thought that Debra left him for Rusty) bothers him a little more than he said.”

They called Gary's hair “the popular millennial cut” and made him "half Glen Danzig half Wolverine."

Doc has drunk his own urine multiple times because they pee in bottles in the Astrobase. "Recently".

During the last scene in the movie when everyone is talking, Gary and Hatred were talking about a loofah. Hatred asked Gary "Ah...you use a loofah?". Dr. O was talking about intermittent fasting.

24 made a guest appearance in the "Fan Questions" extra for a few seconds.

They refused to answer the questions about Scare Bear and what Rusty and Billy were doing in the time machine in case they're able to continue the story.

They made a joke about telling people just enough in the commentary to get them excited and want more. (A “joke” haha)

During Prom, Pete and Billy would have studied the Push It video extensively. Pete would’ve entered the dance floor and “boxed it out” to make space. Billy would’ve walked in the circle nonchalantly. Then they would have recreated the entire dance.

youtube

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erinwantstowrite · 2 months ago

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i wish biggering was in the actual lorax movie,, i was so obsessed w that song for so long… it works so much better as a cautionary and scary song for a villain 💔 i think making the onceler practically oblivious of what his actions were doing took a lot away from what the movie could have been.. like he knew it was BAD, but it was toned down SO much. like the difference between the line “who cares if a few trees are dying?” and “who cares if some things are dying? i don’t wanna hear your crying”.. like hello he was aware he was killing animals and destroying their homes JUST for himself.. don’t get me wrong, how bad can i be is fun, yeah,, but it’s no biggering!! like it’s supposed to be showing how far gone the onceler went into the corporate nature, and how it reflects a lot of real life corporations and billionaires sitting at the top of the chain, getting more and more, to the point that it’s terrifying. and biggering is showing JUST how far it goes.. at least for a children’s movie lol.. but no. it hit to close to home with the men at the top of everything to actually put it in the movie. the lorax’s whole speech in biggering literally just calls them out directly. BUT NO. (can you tell i really really like the lorax..)

YOU GET MEEEE YOU REALLY GET ME

i love the Lorax (though I wasn't ever in the fandom... they scared me), and sometimes I go back to watch it and think about what could have been... I listen to Biggering all the time, though mostly when i'm mad about corporations and advertising and etc etc etc, i also listen to it because it's just a GREAT antagonist song/song in general. if i can put it on a playlist for a villain character, IT'S GOING ON THERE. How Bad Can I Be is good but Biggering just hits harder

if anyone wants to know what song we're talking about WhySoAnimated's storyboard project also readjusted something in my brain wen I watched it as a kid

#biggering (lorax)#lorax #tags i didn't know i'd put on this blog #whatevs this song deserves it's spot #thank you for the ask!#i had a twisted wonderland oc with this song before and it's kind of hilarious objectively #because he's based on mother gothel #but he got loraxed

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wolvertooth · 5 months ago

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can you plz hate rant about the deadpool & wolverine movie… saw it last week and i didn’t like it all… very refreshing to see that someone shares my opinion lmao

i got u man👍 most of this was in my drafts from after the movie came out, but i just never got around to posting it. i added some other opinions ive had since then, tho theres still a lot ive said over the past month that ive totally forgotten about lol

the intro sequence was fucking HYPE‼️ but then, part way thru the movie, u realize....it doesnt ever hit that same mark again. WHERE TF WAS THE HUGH JACKMAN SONG THEY PROMISED? the trailers showed 95% xmen origins clips. the movie didnt mention it once. no the brothers line doesnt count. false fucking advertising. deadpools sexuality has been confirmed since 2014. and now, 10 years later, its still being reduced to gay jokes. and people still eat it up like its genuine rep.

that guy at the tva who’s whole punchline was that he likes men. why. in 2024. why is that allowed. his whole character was a gay joke. i mean so was deadpool, but this guys whole thing was. That. can i say homophobia? can i say i felt that? is that reasonable? this movie felt like a fundraiser for the future avengers movies to make up for all the recent flops.

i watched this shit twice and yea. i was right. the plot was half assed. once u watch it once, thats it. thats the fun. its all just cameos. the jokes didnt even make me laugh again, since it was majority shock based humor. my second watch thru i was trying not to fall asleep in my chair. the way it lacks plot isnt in the Not Coherent kind of way, but rather 'this couldve been a 40 minute monster of the week episode'....or maybe even a 2 episodes if they wanted to get freaky with it it just felt so separate from the rest of the movies, like it wasnt even a sequel.

literally, the movie begins with them abandoning the previous timeline and wade moving to a new ‘better’ one.....almost like hes moving over to a more sacred timeline.........separate from fox.........which is dumb af cuz the movie couldve been him accepting that whatever happens in ur life u cant go back and change, and u have to make due with the good u already have. the previous movie ended with him having a family, he didnt need a new one. i mean, they did that for logans 'learning moment', why wouldnt that also apply to wade? paradox literally says ‘hey we brought u in cuz the mcu is dying, so u should come over to the sacred timeline’ and then after he changes into his costume THEY CHANGE THE PLOT. THEY THROW THAT OUT. WITHIN MINUTES. now paradox is like ‘actually just your timeline is dying, and i wont elaborate on how that works. and also u dont get to go to the sacred timeline. and i hate you.’ WHY BRING HIM THERE AT ALL THEN IF THATS THE PLOT U CHANGED IT TO? ITS DOESNT MAKE SENSE. even if the plot was that he had to go to the sacred timeline cuz his own was dying, WHY WOULDNT HE BE ABLE TO BRING HIS FRIENDS?

what was the vanessa plot? they never explain why she broke up with him? theres like a tiny flashback where she says hes been distracted ever since he got rejected, rejected from what? clearly not the avengers, since that happens after she leaves him. so wtf was the motive here????? the cameos felt like props. especially the deadpool corps, which i feel like they didnt even skim a wiki article for. they just went off google images. which hurt me. cuz i reallyyyyy like those guys....in the comics, theyre a group of deadpools(consisting of lady deadpool, kidpool, headpool, dogpool, and deadpool), who in their first series save the multiverse from being destroyed(sound familiar?). theyre the GOOD GUYS. why tf would they hear cassandra nova say ‘hey im gonna kill the entire multiverse’ and go ‘alright sure whatever’. why were they in the void to begin with? how’d they get there? isnt the void just for movie continuities anyway? why was cassandra also there? how does the void work? why does the void exist? will someone please explain literally anything in this movie? why not have them come in later to save the fucking day instead??

oh lady deadpool...how they massacred ur character... OH KIDPOOL.....HOW THEY MASSACRED UR CHARACTER...... god speaking of that. cassandra nova had literally so much potential and they watered her down to just Evil Villain. she hasnt done much in the comics, but one the things she did in one them was using her powers for therapy on the xmen(which deadpool also made a cameo in). she sort of does this briefly in that one scene, but it was just so.....basic. bland. why was there no b plot with the rest of the main cast. did they think the audience doesnt watch these movies for them? cuz i sure fucking do. i was waiting for the continuation of colossus and wades epic romance arc. side note, the gay jokes in the previous movies felt even less queerbaity then these ones. this movies queerbaiting was just....sad. marketing queerbaiting. this movie WISHES it couldve been deadpool 2 levels of queerbait(shoutout to the extended sex mimicking scene set to In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel)

did anyone catch at the end when deadpool was narrating and when he said ‘friends’ yukio and negasonic teenage warhead were on screen. did anyone see that. they disney gal paled them.

i know wade is supposed to be the Funny Guy but man. thats literally all he was this movie. the other ones has ANGST they had him be HUMAN while this one was like 'logan was mean to me one time ):' bro. what happened. where'd the writers go.

this wolverine was like. the wolverine 2014 wolverine. which is when fox wolverine started to lose character and just become grumpy and mean. hes also like that in Logan 2017, but the reason why this kinda attitude works in that one is bcuz hes old, hes fucked up, hes tired, and every fuck that comes outta his mouth he means it. and yet....still manages to experience other emotions. what a concept. ive read literal satire comics that understood his character more(shoutout to the What The--?! series). it just had me waiting for the 'gotcha! this wolverine is actually 3 dimensional!' but it never fucking got there. it was amusing in the beginning, but by like half way in, i did not give a single fuck about this guy. they tried to give him some emotional moment(like. the only emotional moment in the entire film) but it just...lacked the emotion. just 'heres my sad backstory. are u sad now?' and then they did the SAME THING AGAIN no we get it man u were at the bar instead of with ur friends and u went on a classic wolverine style berserker rage. why should we care tho?

i mean, sure, they could use the excuse of being in the type of depressive state where ur emotions numb out(speaking as a mfer with the came curse), and yea hes not the kinda guy to open up about his emotions unless he really trusts someone(which he would likely distance himself from forming connections with others after that kind of trauma), but with cassandra nova right there there was a missed opportunity for elaborating on that. for digging deep into his brain and telling why this fucked him up so bad. imo, if i were to write it, with everyone he gets close to he puts upon the expectation for himself that hes at fault for anything that happens to them. that he needs to be the savior, even in a friendship. to prove himself to be worth something. especially after a life of being convinced hes a burden by just existing as himself, he needs to have use in order to make up for the fact that hes Logan.

but whos going to save him? isnt he struggling too? whos gonna help you? looking at all the other logans across the multiverse, who is the wolverine? why do you keep falling for the same patterns no matter where you are and who you are? deadpool called sabretooth queen and she/her'd logan within like 5 seconds of eachother. that was pretty good ig

final verdict:

yknow. i think i get now the way fans reacted the way they did tho.

the other night i was rewatching the movie Hackers with my mom, saying that it was obvious the creators mustve known a lot about hacking in order to do such a good parody of it, out of love for the craft….but my knowledge of hacking is pretty minimal, so i have no actual fucking clue if that assumption is accurate or not. im just going off of a ton of references to hacking. for all i know, real hackers couldve hated this movie.

and thats how the average non comic fan saw this movie. they saw a buncha characters and references and thought ‘damn, they must really love the source material’ without knowing how much of a kick in the face it felt like to watch them get used and butchered like that.

#asks #deadpool and wolverine #well. here it finally is.#wade wilson #deadpool #wolverine #logan howlett #fuck it im putting it in their tags too HATERS RISE UP

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underworld-park-offical · 1 year ago

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TOLKIEN: Zzzzzzzzrzrzrzrrzzzz

TOLKIEN: Zzazzazazezezezezezrzrzzrrzrrr

PHONE: ♪ I'M A BARBIE GIRL ♪

PHONE: ♪ IN THE BARBIE WORLD ♪

PHONE: ♪ LIFE IN PLASTIC ♪

PHONE: ♪ IT'S FANTASTIC ♪

TOLKIEN: Huhhheheehdbfd…

TOLKIEN: Huh

TOLKIEN: What

TOLKIEN: What the fuck?

TOLKIEN: Why is my phone going off?

TOLKIEN: Are the fucking queers calling me again?

TOLKIEN: Eeeeyup its them

TOLKIEN: What

GARY: Have you ever been beaten by a wet spaghetti noodle by your girlfriend cuz she has a twin sister and you got confused and fucked her dad, well that’s how it feels to drive a Ford F-250. That sounds really cool. But you know what else is cool? The new 2020 Ford F-150, winner of 10 J.D. power awards. Perfect for hauling big things and going long distances. But you want to go offroad? Try the new Raptor Edition, which cannot just go offroad, it is perfect for going extreme off-roading. You can go rock climbing or across a desert, really quickly. It is also good for the great American thing - BBQs! In fact, you can haul MORE than one oven! That's pretty cool, huh? So hurry, and buy the new 2020 Ford F-150, now for sale at your local Ford dealership. RED: Wgat RED: Stop RED: Stop speaking BEBE: Girl get the tape from the backseat RED: Already on it NICHOLE: Heyyyy Tolkien NICHOLE: Did I wake you?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: No..

NICHOLE: Oh NICHOLE: That’s NICHOLE: That's good

TOLKIEN: What's going on

NICHOLE: So uhm NICHOLE: Ahahaha NICHOLE: Funny story

TOLKIEN: Nichole what did you do??

TOLKIEN: Did you fuckin

TOLKIEN: Commit fraud?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: Again?

NICHOLE: What NICHOLE: No NICHOLE: Of course not NICHOLE: I am a law abiding citizen NICHOLE: Except for when it comes to the Barbie Movies

TOLKIEN: Okay? We’ve all pirated a Barbie Movie

TOLKIEN: What makes you special?

TOLKIEN: If it's not fraud or piracy what did you even do

NICHOLE: There’s a sentient advertisement in our Porsche now

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: Excuse me?

NICHOLE: Yeah uh NICHOLE: We saw Gary NICHOLE: Or G-4R-Y if you wanna use his actual name? NICHOLE: Fuck I don't know anymore NICHOLE: He was walking in the cold for some reason? NICHOLE: And you know how he only speaks in ads?

TOLKIEN: We all do

BEBE: Wait BITCH do you think we could reprogram him to be like

BEBE: An ALEXA???

GARY: Need some music for that impromptu dance off? Ask Alexa to play songs or playlists from Prime Music and Spotify so you're always ready to show off your sweet moves-if that's what you call them ;) "Amazon Echo: Alec Baldwin and Missy Elliott Dance Party Commercial" via @popisms :https://www.popisms.com/TelevisionCommercial/126873/Amazon-Echo-Commercial-2016 GARY: I really don't want you to see me like this. You need some entrance music. Alexa, play Alex dance playlist. Playing Alex playlist. That's dance music? Alexa, play Pep Rally by Missy Elliott. Really? Perfect! I got a little something for you. It's beautiful. Does this mean I'm gonna be in your next video? Let me see what you got. (Lyrics) Anything you want me to (Lyrics) Pep rally, pep rally, pep rally Oh, this a pep rally Pep rally, pep rally, pep rally Bounce, biggity bounce, biggity-biggity bounce, bounce Where my clappers that stomp? Now rock with it Bounce, biggity bounce, biggity-biggity bounce via @popisms : https://www.popisms.com/TelevisionCommercial/126873/Amazon-Echo-Commercial-2016 GARY: I’m Gary! The Mormon who advertises! RED: I mean RED: I’ll become a mechanic if it gets him to stfu 💀💀💀 WENDY: No- RED- NO PUT THE WRENCH DOWN! RED: FUCK YOU GARY: The future. You used to chase it. Now you’re living in it. The Wavefront is an all-electric automobile that propels driving into a new era. With sleek, aerodynamic design, and ultrasonic sensors that prevent collisions, there’s no more getting left behind. Life’s short. Drive fast. GARY: I’m Gary! The Mormon who advertises! RED: SHUT THE FUCK UP!! WENDY: RED!! NO!! BEBE: GIRLY POPS AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU BEBE: I'M GONNA HIT A DEER IF YOU ALL DONT HUSH RED: WENDY LET ME GO I'M GONNA KILL HIM WENDY: WE ARE NOT KILLING THE AD NICHOLE: SHUT THE FUCK UP IM ON THE PHONE BEBE: SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M DRIVING!!!! RED: CAN I THROW HIM OUT OF THE FUCKING CAR??!?!?!?!?!? WENDY AND NICHOLE: NO!!! NICHOLE: Tolkien I'm gonna have to let you go NICHOLE: We might die- NICHOLE: RED PUT DOWN THE WRENCH YOU'RE GONNA KILL SOMEONE! RED: THAT'S THE GOAL!! GARY: As a parent, I want to know that my kids are safe wherever they are. That includes riding in the car. With the new Carpool Optic from Solar I can breathe easy knowing my kids will arrive where they need to safely – whether I am the driver or not. RED: AUGHHHH!!!!!! NICHOLE: I’m hanging up now NICHOLE: MMMMMMMMMOKAYBYE

TOLKIEN: Bye?

(Beep Beep Beep)

TOLKIEN: Jesus christ

TOLKIEN: (Yawn)

TOLKIEN: Man

KENNY: Hey

TOLKIEN: Ah!

TOLKIEN: Oh my god I got jumpscared by a fucking queer!

KENNY: Oh hardy har har har

KENNY: You got games on yo phone?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: What

KENNY: Do you got games

KENNY: On yo phone

TOLKIEN: I mean like

TOLKIEN: I got like

TOLKIEN: Subway surfers??

TOLKIEN: If

TOLKIEN: If that works???

TOLKIEN: Uh

TOLKIEN: Ok?????

TOLKIEN: Here

KENNY: Thanks

KENNY: Oh yeah, can I call my sister while I play subway surfers?

KENNY: I gotta make sure she’s not

KENNY: Yknow

KENNY: Fuckin’ dead

TOLKIEN: No you’re gonna kill my damn battery

TOLKIEN: Just call your sister you dont need to play fucking subway surfers

KENNY: Fine

KENNY: Killjoy

TOLKIEN: Ugh

KAREN: I can't believe McDonald's served me that lukewarm fucking patty

KAREN: And then had the AUDACITY to tell me KAREN: That it gets cold over time!?!?

KAREN: I think they just undercooked it ON PURPOSE to make ME look like an idiot

TRICIA: Damn, that's crazy

(🎵 KAREN METAL 🎵 )

KAREN: OH MY GOD

KAREN: WHO'S CALLING ME AT EXACTLY 1:59 IN THE MORNING?!?!?

TRICIA: Bro just say 2 AM 💀

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: I can’t believe I just said that out loud

KAREN: WHAT?!?!?

KENNY: Hi

KAREN: WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME?!?!?

KAREN: DO YOU KNOW HOW LATE IT IS?!?!?!

KAREN: I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER

KENNY: Sis it's me

KAREN: UGHHHHH

KAREN: You missed your nail appointment

KENNY: Shiiiit that was today?

KAREN: You still owe me the money for it

KENNY: … KENNY: Karen, we don't have money, we’re poor

KAREN: Get a job

KENNY: …I do have a job

KAREN: Okay so then you have money?

KENNY: No

KAREN: That doesn't make sense

KENNY: Anyways- KENNY: You alive?

KAREN: Clearly

KENNY: Okay cool KENNY: So uh KENNY: There's demons around, I hope they find you and kill you and you die bye

KAREN: …What?

KAREN: Tricia do you know what the fuck he’s talking about?

TRICIA: No

TRICIA: Also stop calling on speakerphone

TRICIA: You remind me of my brother (derogatorily)

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: WHY DO I KEEP DOING THAT!?!??!

TRICIA: UGHHH

TRICIA: I’m gonna go yell at my brother by cursing me into the influencer gene pool

TRICIA: You wanna come?

KAREN: If I get to yell at someone, of course

TRICIA: Be-

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: I'm not even gonna say that

CRAIG: Who the fuck where you talking to

CRAIG: I feel like they were talking shit smh my head

KENNY: Oh just my bitch sister and your bitch sister

KENNY: Told her she was gonna die soon

CRAIG: LMAOOOO I’m dead 💀💀💀

KENNY: Lol it was funny she was so mad

TOLKIEN: I swear to god you guys are the same person sometimes

CRAIG: Smh my head no literally untrue

KENNY: Common Tolkien L

TOLKIEN: I want you both dead

CRAIG: …

KENNY: …

TRICIA: Okay where tf is blud

TRICIA: I'm gonna kill his ass

KAREN: Ugh

KAREN: He probably set up Kenny to fucking prank us

KAREN: Going to yell at them both when we find them

TRICIA: For real

TRICIA: Smh my fucking head

TRICIA: OH MY GOD CAN I STOP DOING THAT!?!?

KAREN: There's his door

KAREN: Should I kick it down?

TRICIA: No he will literally kill me

TRICIA: Instead we’re gonna go in his room

TRICIA: Steal all his shit

TRICIA: And fucking burn it

KAREN: Ohh yay! Property damage! My favorite!

TRICIA: Shhh shhh shhhh

TRICIA: Stfu

TRICIA: He’ll hear us

KAREN: No

KAREN: You're not the boss of me

TRICIA: Okay

TRICIA: On three

TRICIA: One- Two-

KAREN: THREE

KAREN: Ew it's so dark in here

KAREN: It smells like fucking Ccool Ranch Doritos in here

TRICIA: Shut the fuck up

TRICIA: He’s gonna hear you

TRICIA: I know where he keeps his Supreme hoodies

TRICIA: HOOOOOLY SHIT IS THAT A DEAD BODY!??!?!?!?

KAREN: AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

KAREN: WE ARE GONNA DIE

KAREN: GET THE MANAGER!!

TRICIA: SHUT THE FUCK UP THE KILLER COULD STILL BE HERE YOU QUEERMO

GREGORY AND ESTELLA: Shhhhh he eepy

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

KAREN AND TRICIA: AAAAAAAAAAA-

TRICIA: Okay

TRICIA: HAILLLL NAWHHHHH

KAREN: I’m calling the police

TRICIA: That is the smartest thing you could ever do

KAREN: Hello? 911?

KAREN: Hi yeah, there's some queers in our house

KAREN: Please come

KAREN: Bye

(Edits made by @pissblanket and @cattpup5)

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universe-of-peoples · 1 year ago

Text

There’s a lot of different opinions about what went wrong with Wish (2023), and i think a lot of them are missing the point.

So here’s my take on what was ACTUALLY wrong with Wish (2023).

Let’s start with what the movie was. It was a cute little movie, just 1 hour 35 minutes long (for reference, about as long as Encanto and a little shorter than Frozen). It had a cute story and a powerful message about working to make your dreams a reality, with a side message of the will of the people is more powerful than one corrupt ruler. It had good music; not as popular as other movies’ music, but I added the songs to my Disney playlist and I genuinely enjoy them. The whole movie was just a fun time.

Now let’s talk about what the movie was expected to be.

Fans expected this movie to be the next big Disney Princess movie, the big important Disney 100 movie, because that’s what it was marketed as. More important of those two was the latter - this was THE Disney 100 movie, the “when you wish upon a star” movie. Yeah, THAT movie. Disney fans were understandably excited. After hits like Frozen, Tangled, Encanto, Moana, and others, Disney had proven it was capable of producing movies that were big emotional hard-hitters that could also be funny and entertaining.

Then let’s shift over to Disney. The eyes of the world turned to them as they advertised their biggest anniversary yet. They had a lot of ideas for this movie (as everyone keeps talking about), but they also had a lot of pressure on them. They probably had story ideas that would have cemented this movie in the ranks of Frozen, Encanto, Tangled, Moana. But you know what it feels like to me?

It feels like Disney got scared.

This movie was supposed to be THE movie that represented their brand. They would have to find a message, an emotional journey that fit their brand but didn’t deviate from the brand’s central theme. Other movies got to tell their own unique stories with diverse emotional journeys because while they were A Disney movie, they weren’t THE Disney movie. Not like this one was supposed to be.

So they watered down any emotional journey the characters went on, relied more heavily on the overly-relatable main character archetype (with her job interview jitters, big group of friends, quirky personality, etc), and threw in the nostalgia bait (that’s a given. It’s the 100th anniversary movie.) Compared to the other Disney movies that could be big emotional hard-hitters, but could also be funny and entertaining, I’d say this movie landed at definitely funny and entertaining, with a smaller emotional journey that definitely wasn’t hard-hitting. The story was just a bit smaller than some other Disney movies.

The thing is, none of these things are inherently bad. It’s ok to tell a smaller story. Other studios do it all the time! Heck, Disney has done lots of them in the past! It’s ok to want your main character to be relatable, it’s ok to put in some references to past works in your movie, it’s ok to have songs that are good but not good enough to break the charts.

So what’s the problem? The problem, as I see it, was the disparity between what was expected and what was delivered. A good part of that expectation came from Disney’s advertisement of the movie, and a smaller part came from fans’ expectations of any Disney Princess movie given the company’s track record. It was a perfect storm of This Movie Isn’t Going To Be Well Received.

IMHO, the movie isn’t bad. It just isn’t what it was expected and advertised to be. So please stop hating on the movie and direct your anger instead to The Mouse, the one who really deserves it.

#disney’s wish #Wish #disneys wish #wish asha #wish star #wish 2023 #disney wish #disney #disney 100

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traewilson · 4 months ago

Text

So on Twitter, a post is going round of a lame fan fiction speculating the ending of Calvin & Hobbes. It's awful. It's completely out of character and tone with the story. It's basically Calvin giving Hobbes to his daughter. I don't really care to talk about it beyond the fact it exists, and commentary around it sparked Thoughts in my brain.

For those of you who don't know, the actual ending of the comic is intentionally open - they hop on their sled and go on another adventure. That's it. They are metaphorically frozen in time, and yet made perpetual, in this ending; there will always be more adventures. There is no ending - even as you grow up and stop being a child, childhood is always happening somewhere. It ends for us individually, but it marches on as a constant of human life. Calvin & Hobbes, the symbol of childhood that they are, shall remain as such long after those who were first raised on it when it was new have passed on.

The reason I'm here writing on this is I suddenly realized - this is a symptom of a wider societal swing in America. One which we've all seen but maybe not had pinned down. People who feel the compulsion, the URGE, to drag their childhood to their adulthood, and, because the people who want to do this tend to be miserable soulless people, they take that thing that gave them so much joy in their youth and rip out everything that made it so special to you as a kid, and make it as grey, realistic, and lifeless as you are.

This mindset is what leads to the live-action / hyper-realistic animation from Disney lately. Very Serious People want to watch The Lion King, but are embarrassed and ashamed of the film they loved as a kid. They still love it, but they need a "socially acceptable" way to watch it.

And that's where the "live action" remake comes in.

The advertising on this film brazenly declaring a CGI animated film as "live action" is the height of madness, until you remember - to call it animation is to call it "kid stuff." If they call it a CGI animated film, Very Serious People think of Minions.

They add Very Serious Nuance in the form of generational warfare between the hyenas and lions; in the form of Scar's desire for power being rooted in cucking Mufasa by claiming his wife Sarabi as his own. They make the animation Very Serious and, therefore, Realistic. So Realistic in fact that, really, to even call it """animation""" is an insult to what they're doing here.

(Even though animation is, obviously, objectively, what it is.)

The animals barely emote, showing less emotion than what even real animals can express, because emotional openness is, to these Very Serious People, bluntly:

C R I N G E.

So, they barely emote. The songs are still there, but they're almost all shambling putrid parodies of the original musical numbers. Favreau didn't even want half the songs to be in the movie; famously Be Prepared was a last-minute addition after mass public backlash - and it shows that it's a last-minute addition. It's barely even sung; more of a spoken word poetry thing than an actual song. Because I feel like either Jon Favreau, his executive overlords, or worse I SAY WORSE both treated the musical aspect of The Lion King as a necessary evil.

It's telling the only song they gassed up wasn't Elton John's new song at the end credits - it was Beyoncé's number, Spirit. A pop number awkwardly slapped on to a musical film apropos of nothing but Those Sales and That Sweet Academy Award for Best Original Song, Baby.

And of course, it worked; the film made over a billion dollars because the world is chock-full of Very Serious Adults who want to take their childhood with them into adulthood, but demand it grow up with them.

They want their childhood, but are embarrassed by that very desire.

We live, in short, in a teenaged society. A society that's matured only in body but not yet in mind.

This is, naturally, because so many of us are, ourselves, adults who only grew up in age.

Some grow wiser; some just get older - if I may paraphrase Paul Williams. And THAT'S the hell of it.

Moral of the story: stop being ashamed of the things you liked as a kid. You CAN take your childhood with you into your adulthood - in fact, it's good and healthy to (in moderation, I must stress; dont overcorrect.) You don't have to do this thing where you make these bumbling shambling homunculi of the things you loved, but without any of that cringeworthy "charm" or "color" or "fun". Learn to enjoy things on their own merits. Fuck realism in art - we have enough reality all around us to ignore, and no matter how hard you push realistic CGI, it'll be never be reality.

#calvin and hobbes #but like only tangentially lol #the lion king 2019 #disney #film criticism #social commentary?#social commentary #an attempt was made #social critique #i dunno

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itsnotablogsblog · 2 months ago

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GOSSIP AND RUMORS LEAD FANS BAFFLED ; KNOCKED LOOSE AUDIENCE WANTS FORMAL APOLOGY?

Rumors about Bryan and Poppy. Jimmy Kimmel Apology, and the theory on music

This is solely for entertainment purposes only, if you have any theories and or questions about whats happening, feel free to comment down below

Hello! Welcome back to another tea rant.

Good morning! Good afternoon, and good evening!

Today it’s gonna be a little different than my usual routine.

We’re going to deep dive into this music industry, and how many artists today have marketing teams into getting fans to buy their music, albums, and much more.

And the tea about what’s been revolving around Jimmy Kimmel and the audience wanting a formal apology.

THE POPPY AND NOAH SITUATION

Of course, this long rant about people saying they’re “dating” or they’re not “dating” has been for a long while.

Ever since Noah asked Poppy about being in a collaboration, many fans speculate this duo is actually a thing.

Sounds like fans are getting confused.

What more grabbed my attention is the third user who had a very interesting theory.

PLANNED IN SECRECY? A Theory

In their post, they state that Noah and the band disappear for awhile, and when they come back either to drop a new photograph of Noah, or him showing off new merch, it seems to be all planned out.

I don’t know where to start, so let’s start out with the basics, how does the business actually work?

This theory led me to think and process what companies really want. Which is money. I think I’m going to break it down bit by bit into categories. Since this user is being specific.

CATEGORY 1 : LABELS

This is label marketing. The term used for music label industries, in which they want to sell items and sell products for bands

Such as Linkin Park, BabyMetal, Metallica, Knocked Loose, Bad Omens, BTS, anyone that has some type of contract with different music industries.

Now labels, they get you anything in the business. It’s their way to market off of your money for them to sell you what you want.

It’s not a bad thing actually, it’s been happening for decades. So it’s pretty normal for companies to do this.

Category 2: ADVERTISING

In this category, once they have a good understanding and both parties agree to run an advertising strategy or product they usually put it out on social media.

They can advertise a band, making collaborations with a person to help them out and find new audiences.

It’s their own way to market off and get money from their consumers.

Like for example how they did with Poppy and Bad Omens.

Poppy signed the contract with Sumerian for her new album “Negative Spaces”

This led Sumerian find different ways to advertise her in many articles, being photographed with Noah, and being photographed with the group to promote one of their songs.

I’m telling you now, please do not come after Sumerian Records, this is just how they do things and business. It’s normal for companies to do things like this. It’s their job.

With advertising, since each label manager has an employee their financing from, it’s a lot more easy to have them produce songs.

Category 3 : MANAGERS AND PR TEAMS

So as you might have guessed, each front person, has an individual label manager or management and what they call assistants PR teams.

So what do they do?

In short terms, they are responsible for everything, just like the band is responsible for gaining profits.

1. Booking Gigs

2. Negotiate contracts

3. Promote

4. Arrange schedules

5. Broker deals

6. Financial management

7. Advising bands on career decisions

8. Band scheduling

9. Booking and scheduling

10. Securing record deals

11. Attending a bands performance

12. Artist development

13. Branding

14. Career Development

15. Encouraging and supporting their bands

16. Network with other band managers

17. Record label representation

18. Working as hard as the band

If you haven’t seen the movie “American Satan”

In terms it’s like that movie, where a band is wanting a career path into the music business.

So why have managers?

That’s easy to say.

A band can’t do it alone. They need an anchor to support them. In this case management. Management can bring a band together to promote them.

For example, since Bad Omens is the new band and the most popular, my guess is that they signed with Sumerian Records for their talent.

See each label looks for talent or in terms “make the scene”

There’s a lot to explain here, from what I mean by this statement is that record labels look for talented musicians who in their eyes can become very successful in the long run.

As for PR management, their job is to solely focus on making sure they get their band visibility on various platforms. Like social media.

They are also responsible for scheduling interviews, make sure the frontman or lead singer gets a highlight of their performance, make sure they advertise their music. They’re responsible for scheduling tours.

Category 4 : MONEY INCOME

So this leads us to this theory this user mentioned.

Bands just don’t announce a new album or new merchandise until they have or have been set on how much they’re going to sell.

If it’s behind the scenes then i say it sure is dealt with secretly.

Money is a distribution. A lot of it comes from on how many people want to become rich. It’s a huge product among the United States.

In this case we could think of it as the higher ups.

This distribution is normal. It’s used for marketing, it’s used in jobs, it’s used in your day to day lives.

Money nowadays gets us everywhere. It gets us our groceries, it gets us monthly or weekly payments due to working regular jobs and eight hour shifts.

Well in huge companies, like music industries money is a huge deal. It’s a way of making money from advertising and selling products.

But that’s all I know so far.

This brings the theory into if it is actually all planned out

PLANNED OUT IN SECRECY

The user above mentioned that it could potentially be planned out.

I mean planning out every little thing that the band agrees on doing could be possibly the next big thing.

If they want to profit off anything, they have the power to do so.

If Bad Omens doesn’t post for many days or weeks at a time, maybe they’re planning out something big.

But this also revolves around how many tour dates and schedules they have to attend. Now this is where it gets interesting because whether or not we know how this music industry works, it makes a good theory.

THEORY #1: The Band Profits off of what fans buy.

Bad Omens is a good example on this subject. It brought me back to what I delve down into the rabbit hole.

For instance, concerts.

In this particular case, from what I’ve heard from many people that surprised me was the way they profit money from selling tickets.

This can be a good tactic, especially if they want to get fans to buy tickets. It’s their way to make the fans happy by giving them the option to buy merch, buy vinyls, albums, and many more.

THEORY 2: THEY LURK

For instance, this is just an FYI we know that Noah doesn’t have socials, and deleted everything off the web.

Just like Matt Dierkes, Bryan, and Ryder, they have socials. But what do they use them for?

I think if Noah was aware of what is happening around social media, he might be the one behind the Bad Omens official social media.

Maybe, he sees everyone’s comments and posts. To where they might have seen every beef and every rant that each fan posted.

This leads to the theory they might be lurkers and peep at every little detail that comes right out of the social platform.

Maybe Ryder and Matt keep tabs on everything and monitor what fans want.

Could it just be coincidence or is it real?

In the past, we know Noah talked to fans and kept them in the loop for new music and new albums back in 2019.

But after he disappeared from social media, this leads to the theory that he is still on socials.

But we can’t know for sure.

This has lead to many deep fakes and fake Noah Sebastian accounts that led many people to believe they are talking to the real Noah.

If people say to you he’s a real person talking behind the screen, then it’s probably not the real Noah Sebastian. A lot of fans joke about it, but I think it’s just dumb trying to troll other fans that he’s real.

I think it’s highly annoying that this shit keeps happening.

So why do they lurk?

This brings back to the tea blogs on this app, that many people have conversations about. But since they’re just speculations, it’s not something to deeply worry about.

It’s completely normal for people who work with bands have social media. This is another way to get fans and get followers to interact with the band and their assistance.

Whether they lurk on social media, they have known about situations.

They look out for the good comments and bad ones.

This theory also applies to them planning things out for the long run and possibly plan ahead for the fans to enjoy.

This includes their merchandise on their official website, their albums, and more likely their music.

What the fans look for and what they want in specific items, etc.

A band isn’t just people playing drums, guitar, bass, and backing vocals and having a lead singer.

It is a business.

If we understand that what they look for is good then they’ll find a way to advertise it. Planning it out in secret.

I’m not against anyone but it sounds fairly smart for companies to do this.

MORE BUYS = MORE BUSINESS

quality over quantity.

MORE BUSINESS = MORE MONEY

So when it comes to their merchandise, they look for the best quality of products to sell. This includes them making them in a factory where they work with several artists and producers.

Since Bad Omens have been doing this for years, they’re the ones buying the most to get what the fans want.

This is where when they put out their merchandise, fans buy the items and Bad Omens profit from them.

Now that’s a good way to make business.

And no, they’re not using AI to produce these results.

People tend to manipulate others into thinking it is AI, just because they want to start drama.

In this case, they are definitely not using anything related to AI.

That’s why they have the best tattoo artist and comic book writer Davis Ryder.

I think a lot of people tend to forget that they have a tattoo artist in their band which is Nicholas Ruffilo and Davis Ryder, who is responsible for making these designs stand out than most.

I’m not too sure about Jolly. But he does play a role

This leads to Jolly being the second person to help Noah produce and co-write songs.

Jolly and Noah have been doing this for years. They wrote Dethrone together and the past two albums of their launching careers.

Nicholas has been with them since they first met.

Folio came afterwards after finding a good person to play drums.

So for anyone thinking it is AI, it’s not. These men have been doing business since the very beginning of their careers.

Noah knows a lot about this business, since he was a teen.

He grew up knowing his way around bands.

From starting out to play guitar in one of the bands he used to be a part of in Washington, to moving to Los Angeles.

THEORY 3: SUMERIAN RECORDS

So, this leads to theory 3 being Sumerian Records and how they navigate through the music business.

Like I said, Sumerian records is a huge company. They are responsible for everything and everyone.

This leads them to the list of supporting the band.

They navigate their way through social media and putting out what profits them.

I’m not saying it’s bad for them to advertise their band. It’s actually good for them.

This has the best opportunity for the band to get money from the fans and tours for them to entertain. After all it’s an entertainment industry.

If you have seen American Satan, then it plays a role into this theory.

Bands look for what they want for fans to enjoy music.

This led to Bad Omens to support Linkin Park on them starting a new tour. With them bringing Erra, for Anything > Human.

Sumerian Records does support Bad Omens. They’re not putting them aside. If they were putting them aside for not showing them support then it would be the complete opposite.

If you guys remember they are working on a new album and new merch. Just like they did the past few years. Starting from 2019 to current 2024.

CONFUSION ON FANS

So if there is a theory that Sumerian is just doing this for marketing reasons there’s no need to worry.

It’s all part of the process for bands to do this.

There’s been a lot of speculation about it.

But since this is all just rumors and people gossiping that they’re definitely doing this for marketing purposes, it’s basically normal.

It’s not illegal to do.

The good news on this is that they’re gaining more money just by selling items that the band produces and makes.

Making fans happy and making the metal industry entertaining.

But a lot of fans are simply confused if Poppy is actually a stunt artist, that Sumerian put in order for her album to sell.

I think it’s a way to say

CONSUMER BEFORE THE BUYER

By this I mean the company that profits most from a band is that the band themselves is a consumer for the company.

They work with bands, make music and if they hit a million streams on this specific song it goes out to the public before they start buying vinyls and merchandise.

This makes a lot of industries take action and gain money.

THIS BRINGS ME BACK POPPY

If fans think that Noah and Poppy are dating then why isn’t there more publicity on them hanging out together?

From what we’ve seen and heard is that yes Noah likes to keep everything private.

Since we haven’t seen a lot of photos of them together, the rumors on them being involved romantically is a very low chance.

This brings the fact that maybe paparazzi are being paid to catch Noah in photos, with Poppy like going to Jimmy Kimmel.

I mean paparazzi, there’s a reason why celebrities hate people who take pictures. They can stalk you, they can come out of nowhere, they have things organized.

It’s all due to their own management and bosses that tell them what to do and when to be there.

Also journalists and media outlets.

The acting and music industry is big, bigger than any other business out here in the United States alone.

This keeps the fans and the audience guessing if they’re actually dating.

If this was all organized and planned out then the theory of being a secret to the audience might be correct.

Maybe it is planned out secretly.

Poppy alone, wouldn’t be doing this on her own. Sumerian always has something up their sleeve for their contract employees to gain popularity.

Anyways on the good side of things I have more tea to spill out

BRYAN AND POPPY

It sounds like this particular fan is suggesting that Bryan and Poppy are having a thing right after they looked at each other on Jimmy Kimmel.

Also blaming the bad omens fans for being weird?? How does that correlate to them having an idea if the Noah situation with poppy is real?

I mean would you rather get controversial and have the fans come after you?

Also who is this Andrew Davis??

Obviously he was replying to the OG Poster.

I think they’re just rage bait, but I don’t think Poppy would have sex with anyone just because she’s famous right? I mean she was engaged in 2021 I think.

But what about Jordan and Poppy?

Like heck forget Noah and Poppy, like if Jordan was to date Poppy, what would happen to his kids? Is he divorcing his wife? Is he no longer happy in his marriage?

Also this leads to my question if Jordan and Noah are friends.

Also did anyone see Bad Omens on Jimmy Kimmel? Or was it just Knocked Loose?

There’s a lot of speculations, and a lot of rumors.

What do you think?

PUBLICITY AND FAME

So where I left off on paparazzi, there’s always going to be a publicity being made.

In this case we see it a lot more when bands are out in the public eye, and where they are being seen.

If Noah and Poppy aren’t being photographed everywhere they go, then it’s probably because the media organized the whole event. Not just to promote them but promote their work and their brand.

But don’t let that stop you from buying from Bad Omens or Poppy.

In all honesty Bad Omens is a great contributor for letting their fans enjoy music.

Whatever tea blog you have read that said Noah doesn’t care about fans, then they’re probably in the wrong.

Noah wouldn’t create a band, he wanted to create a band, but he wasn’t expecting to get big. Now that he has grabbed attention and fame, this gives him the chance to make more music and more money to his expenses.

Bad Omens makes sure that what you buy from them are good quality. They have a great support system and merch support team that allows the seller to communicate with the buyer if some of their merchandise arrives damaged.

They make sure each fan gets what that they enjoy the most.

JIMMY KIMMEL FORMAL APOLOGY

This leads to my last rant that I recently seen which is that various audiences that saw Knocked Loose on Jimmy Kimmel want a formal apology.

It sounds like Jimmy Kimmel is getting bashed over how many audience viewers complained about Knocked Loose performance on “SUFFOCATE”

Let’s be real for a second, in the music industry there’s always going to be a lot of hate.

But this is tea where some audience viewers just didn’t like the performance.

So I watched part of the clip on YouTube since I don’t really watch television. The performance of Knocked Loose I mean if I was being absolutely honest, it wasn’t good.

Poppy’s moaning and screaming felt like a kid trying to get ice cream from a parlor.

It didn’t really sound so good at all. Also Bryan, could’ve done more to his part in my opinion.

But since this was at Jimmy Kimmel, the audience didn’t like it. So they decided to get a formal apology from either Knocked Loose or Jimmy himself.

I mean if you hated the performance, I think there must have been better ways rather than asking someone for an apology that they brought a good band out there to perform, but if that’s what you think then I’m not gonna question anything more about it.

To me frankly when they came out and sang the song, I could not even understand a word they were saying.

It was like they didn’t even try to sing the lyrics.

Here are what other people have said:

Facebook user recounted the show’s impact on their teenage son, writing, “I was sitting on the couch with my son who is an ADOLESCENT waiting to see the musical guest because we like the nice music the show usually books. By the third or fourth ‘JUNT’ from the guitars my son was in tears. He doesn’t like scary things and quite frankly I think the Kimmel show and its staff should make a formal apology.”

Another “keyboard-warrior” detractor echoed the age-old metal critique: the lyrics were unintelligible, and the screaming was unbearable. “If I have to read the lyrics I’ll just read them and not listen to someone yell them”. Another frustrated commenter expressed disdain for the chaotic energy, saying, “This what not enjoyable. And you can’t understand more than 5% of the lyrics. Moshing doesn’t not equal dancing.” The confusion in their typos only seemed to amplify the melodrama.

A “music expert” went on to say it wasn’t even music: "How do I sing along with this??? Lol sounds just like a screaming frenzy to me!! Actually starting to hurt my ears!! People who listen to this have no room to complain about crying babies or screaming two-year-olds taking a tantrum!! Ha ha unreal!!! They call this music Jimmy??"

That’s a lot of hate.

I think having them collab with Poppy was a bad idea.

Other people can think otherwise. I don’t get why Poppy is so popular when they ask to collaborate with her in particular.

Why do bands like her?

This might seem like a big jump but I feel like they just want Poppy’s attention and time to make a good impression on their album. But with what’s been happening with Bad Omens and them having new bands or new starting artists as fans and audiences, the newer generation of new bands want to be just like them.

They’re taking a big interest on Bad Omens, more to where they are inspired to do what Bad Omens is doing.

All of this is very weird to me.

#bad omens #bad omens cult #spill the tea #poppy and noah #nicholas ruffilo #nick folio #jolly karlsson #noah sebastian davis #drama #noah sebastian

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centaurianthropology · 4 months ago

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Hammer Horror-a-thon: 'The Satanic Rites of Dracula'

So, after an unexpectedly delightful turn with 'Dracula A.D. 1972', we conclude our brief detour through the Lee/Cushing Dracula flicks with 'The Satanic Rites of Dracula.'

The opening credits are sort of a fun mix of the super funky opening credit song for 'Dracula A.D. 1972' with the more traditional sound a fury of the original 'Horror of Dracula' theme. Sort of like this is an attempt to bring the previous film together with the older films? We shall see. We also learn that the script is once again by Don Hougton, the same screenwriter who wrote 'Dracula A.D. 1972' (and I genuinely thought the script in that was pretty solid for being a B flick), but we've lost our beloved director of photography from that same movie, Dick Bush (still his real name). So we might not be be getting the rather ambitious shots and compositions we got in that film.

Behold, Dick Bush, who didn't shoot this film, but apparently won BAFTAs for his cinematography, and after 'Dracula A.D. 1972, I believe it. Sad to see you won't be taking this trip with us, King.

And post-credits we really do jump straight into the Satanic Rites, which I appreciate. Truth in advertising and all that. We have a bunch of pudgy middle aged dudes in robes, and, showing me why we jumped in rating from 'A.D. 1972' (PG) to an R rating, we immediately get a topless lady sacrifice. I mean, these movies have been very horny, but these are the first more-than-suggested boobs I've seen in my admittedly short viewing experience.

Then again, they're catering to the drive-in crowd, so tits were probably a major selling point.

Our Satanic rites, meanwhile, are being recorded and listened to by a dude with killer muttonchops and a fluffy vest. The very picture of 70s dude. He brings of mug of tea to an equally mutton-chopped and fluffy-vested dude in another room, while a third guy lies in a cot tied up. Our prisoner starts groaning, drawing Mutton Chop #2's attention, who promptly gets his ass strangled by Mustache, who sneaks away past an oblivious Mutton Chop #1.

Sometimes you gotta do your Satanic rites while bored dudes in fluffy vests record you for reasons.

But while he's sneaking out he triggers an alarm, alerting the cultists and getting Mutton Chop #1 to pursue him (along with yet another guy in a fluffy vest). Mutton Chop #1 is shot by a sniper, who picks him up in a car and they make their escape.

I had presumed the Mutton Chop army were surveilling the cult, but apparently the cult is aware of the recordings and is into it? Maybe they're making a documentary.

Seriously, where can I get one of those fluffy vests? I want one.

Cut to Mustache lying on a cot in some sort of brightly-lit, sterile interrogation room or something. He's being questioned by dudes about a guy named Porter while a doctor monitors him and all his answers are being recorded. He describes 'obscene rites' and claims to have photos.

Then he dies, because of course he does.

The dudes talking to him seem to be police or investigators or something. There also seems to be a routine for disposing of the bodies involved in the supernatural, apparently, because they'll be forging a death certificate for him. We're twelve minutes in and we have a cult and a supernatural governmental investigatory agency. Which I suppose is the logical conclusion for the Hammer universe, given how many monsters populate it. At some point, someone is going to try to regulate and litigate them.

Also their boss might be in the cult. So we've also got government corruption. This plot so far is a lot more complex than 'Dracula gets a groupie to resurrect him in the 1970s so he can slasher-flick his way through a group of hippie teens', and I'm not altogether certain yet that it's going to be for the better.

So they decide they'll bring in someone to help them, because of corruption and 'I'm only on your side in this room' and 'outside this secret we're keeping you're on your own.' Cheap spy thriller stuff, but it all seems to be a convoluted way to bring the same police inspector from the last film back into the picture to investigate the cult.

Because he honestly didn't leave much of an impression in the last film, I had to look it up. And yes, it's the same actor (Michael Coles) come back to play the character again, this time looking gloriously 1970s. While I don't mind his return, I'm a little disappointed, because with that outfit he looks a lot like David Warner, one of my favorite actors, and I was really excited for a second before realizing it wasn't him.

He gets briefed by the Government Dudes (mostly an excuse to get the most mileage out of the Satanic Rites set and the fact they still have a naked lady on screen). You get the feeling that half of the 'cultists' are just there to ogle and Touch Boob. And it turns out they're all powerful and well-known middle-aged dudes hoping to Touch Boob. Then the naked lady, who seemed very into everything right up until this point, gets stabbed by the High Priestess (the only one at the rite who seems like a real professional, and not just interested in Boob).

Meanwhile, while they're briefing Murray, the woman who ran the recording equipment for the Government Dudes is getting in a high-speed chase with the Mutton Chop Army. They catch her.

Back to the ritual, and the naked lady is brought back to life and healed. Sacrificial recycling! Cool!

Having got caught up, Murray immediately brings van Helsing in on the investigation, bringing one of the Government Dudes back. Because Murray is nothing if not practical.

And we're reunited with Lorrimer (hopefully I'm spelling that name right now) van Helsing, still mostly a researcher, with no strong indication if he spends much of his time monster hunting, or if that's more of an occasional treat. We also get reunited with Jessica van Helsing. And right off, grand tragedy: we no longer have Stephanie Beacham as Jessica. However, to make me far less sad about the loss, her replacement is none other than Joanna Lumley!! I have loved her since 'Sapphire and Steel' (legitimately one of my favorite shows ever), and she brings a very different quality to the role.

The (slightly revised) van Helsings and Inspector Murray

Joanna Lumley is a much cooler, quieter presence than the effervescent Stephanie Beacham. While Beacham was a contrast to Cushing's more quiet energy, Lumley seems to be an older and more mature Jessica, matching his energy rather than contrasting it. She's soft spoken, and has apparently become a very talented supernatural researcher in her own right. I'm still hopeful she's at least gotten some training as well as research chops, given her line of work. I'm not expecting Buffy, but I'm at least hoping for concealed crucifixes and holy water. After all, Lorrimer isn't much for physical violence either, and every time Dracula gets defeated it tends to be with improvised weaponry.

At least make sure the lady can whittle herself a pit trap like her grandfather!

We also learn that one of the wealthy men who wanted to Touch Boob was an old school friend of van Helsing's: Professor Keeley, a biochemist who won a nobel prize (feels like the satanic rites would have come up in a Nobel background check, but maybe they were just handing those things out like cereal box toys in the 1970s).

Van Helsing is hoping that Keeley is innocent, and proposes he go talk to the man first. The investigators figure he might get more out of Keeley than they would, and agree to the plan.

Keeley isn't doing well. He seems like he's in the middle of some sort of breakdown, being worked into exhaustion. The actor playing him (Freddie Jones) was a fairly well-known character actor, and ends up doing a lot with a little screentime. His chemistry with Cushing is solid, and his performance very much conveys the feel of a man doing work he's not even sure why he's doing.

And what is that work?

Growing mold, apparently.

We come back to the lady recording the session, and find her in the same cot that Mustache was in at the beginning of the film, having been captured bt the Mutton Chop Army. The door gets knocked open by the fog machine, and we are re-introduced to an already re-resurrected Dracula. It's sort of impressive how little Christopher Lee seems to age in this role, looking about the same as he did in 1958. She gets bit, of course, and I suppose we've got our first new vampire of the film.

Keeley, a little more with it, is meanwhile monologuing about evil while van Helsing sorts through is papers. He's honestly really up front about the whole 'I am a satanist!' schtick, which is considerate of him. Lorrimer slaps him a few times to try to snap him out of the monologue, and demands to know what he's been researching because it looks a lot like he's been engineering a new strain of Yersinia pestis (the Bubonic plague) which, one assumes, would be resistant to penicillin now (fun fact: the plague is basically entirely cured thanks to the invention of antibiotics, which it's very responsive to). And how did he do that? Radiation. He has radioactive plague which is apparently lethal in seconds and spready by touch somehow.

So we have spies, a mad scientist, biological warfare ... this is feeling rather sci-fi horror, and I still have no idea why anyone is doing what they're doing. I definitely have no idea how Dracula is involved. Is he directing all this, or is he mostly along for the ride?

I really hope the answer is deeply stupid, because so far this movie is trying to be clever and is mostly boring. I want some real goofy shit kicking off soon.

Unfortunately for van Helsing, the Mutton Chop army has been monitoring Keeley's work, and arrives, shooting van Helsing (in the head??) but somehow only giving him a little scrape. Because that's how guns work. He patches himself up with a cute little white bandaid and he's good to go.

Congrats to Lorrimer van Helsing for being able to slap a bandaid on a gunshot wound to the head and apparently be fine.

Keeley is a lot less lucky, because he's apparently completed his work, so the cult just has him murndered and hanged in his lab, snatching all the moldy petri dishes plague.

Meanwhile, Murray and Government Dude are ragingly misogynistic to Jessica, who they brought with them to the cult headquarters but insist she not come in with them or act as an expert on the supernatural for them, despite her being trained to do exact that. Instead they leave her at the car. Why did you even bring her if you were going to be such dicks? I hope you both get murdered by Dracula, you pair of bumble fucks.

They question the high priestess, insisting they're investigating a bunch of 'motorcycle hooligans' and want to search the mansion for them. Meanwhile, Jessica sneaks into the house, deftly avoiding the security system that Mustache tripped. She finds that Dracula still likes to put his crypt in a really publicly accessible place (some things never change). She discovers the recording lady from the Government and tries to rescue her, only to be beset but a whole heap of vampiric bisexuality. She doesn't seem happy about being mugged by a ton of vampiric ladies, but the first one? I think Jessica was at least a little happy she found the sexy lesbians dungeon.

Luckily for Jessica, all the lady vampires seem much less interested in biting her than feeling her up. Unluckily for her, we get confirmation that Jessica did not, in fact get training on vampiric ass-kicking (boo! Both the van Helsings falling down on the job; it's apparently been two years and you two did NOT have a training montage, did you??). Murray and Government Dude rescue her, and Government Dude recognizes the new vampire recording lady, and Inspector Murray stakes her. They leave the other vampiric ladies and run, pursued by the Mutton Chop Army.

Jessica, hoping she's found the lesbian dungeon, and only finding the vampire dungeon.

Van Helsing at least is already suspecting Dracula's involvement somehow, and he thinks that something is being organized. He wants to investigate Keeley's bakroller, a guy named D.D. Denham who owns a combination of various corporations with the other guys who were spotted in the cult.

And wait, according to van Helsing, they're whipping up this plague to wipe out all of humanity. Is the entire plot of this movie actually about Dracula getting so sick of being resurrected that he wants to wipe out humanity so he can get some damned sleep? Because if that's actually the plot of this movie, I might take back every bad thing I've said about it so far.

The Government Dudes, Murray, and Jessica do some surveillance of the cult headquarters, but oh no! Government Dudes are both assassinated by one of the Mutton Chops with a sniper rifle. Rest in Piss you misogynistic bastards. I hope Jessica stakes some vampires just to spite you.

While they're being taken down with regular bullets, van Helsing has been smelting silver bullets for a tiny holdout pistol. Because it's the 1970s and van Helsing is strapped now, even if it's with the world's most adorable derringer.

Murray and Jessica barely outrun the sniper and find the Government Dudes' car, but oh no! It's an ambush! Murray is knocked out, and Jessica is taken prisoner to once again play the damsel (boo once more).

Meanwhile, van Helsing goes to confront 'Denham', and it's deeply unshocking that it's actually Dracula. Who's now a corporate criminal as well as a vampire (is that some sort of commentary on corporate greed? Or is that too smart for this movie?).

And for the first time in what feels like WAAAAY too many movies, we get an actual conversation between Dracula and van Helsing. Dracula puts on a cad Bela Lugosi accent (cute touch). And yeah, the plot of this movie really does seem like Dracula wants to get some fucking sleep. They have a quick chat before van Helsing confirms it's Dracula and draws his adorable derringer.

Look at this adorable tiny gun

Only to have his aim knocked off-course by the other cult members. They want to execute him right away, but Dracula isn't going to let that happen. They only just got their first proper conversation! Van Helsing is too sexy! Dracula absolutely has to keep him around for a way more convoluted seduction death.

It's so dumb. I'm thrilled we've finally gotten to the stupid part of this movie, and hopes it gets dumber. And since van Helsing is now captured, I am also really hoping we get some genuine scenes between Cushing and Lee. Don't get me wrong; I love it when they throw one another around a room for a bit, but to actually exchange meaningful dialogue? In my Dracula movie??

Hopefully it's more likely than I fear.

Meanwhile, Murry nearly gets murdered by the high priestess vampire, only to realize that the entire crypt of vampiric bisexuality is filled with conveniently placed stakes and has a full fucking sprinkler system. Which feels like a serious oversight on the cult's part. I am deeply disappointed he wasn't ripped to shreds, and all thanks to the worst home planning in the world.

He finds Jessica once again in a magical sleep (this happens to her every few years), but has to leave her and hide from the cult members dragging van Helsing in. Dracula once again means to bite Jessica, this time complete with pyrotechnics and monologuing.

But he is once again gets properly derailed as soon as van Helsing starts talking. Because poor Jessica seems to mostly end up being a setpiece in their weird little back-and-forth. She's there mostly to get a rise out of van Helsing, to really kick the fight off properly.

But what actually happens is, in the middle of some not-so-great dialogue about plagues and shit, we actually get some real acting out of Cushing and Lee. Dracula seems almost desperate. behind the bluster, he seems miserable. He seems tired and sad and just wanting an end. And van Helsing confronts him about it: is all this convoluted bullshit just a cover for his death wish? Does he want to annihilate an entire planet just so he'll finally be left alone?

The looks they give one another in this moment is a reminder that, despite some dogshit movies and some dogshit scripts, both Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing were world-class actors. They could take this really poor script and make a moment in it that transcended the material.

Even just for an instant, this movie was really genuinely good.

it's hard to convey how good this very brief moment was in an otherwise sort of shit movie.

But it turns out that staritng an apocalyptic plague wasn't what the cultists signed up for. They signed up for power and to Touch Boob. They try to protest, but Dracula hypnotizes one of them into breaking the vial of super plague, which is about the happiest we've seen him all movie. I think he figures he'll finally get a proper quiet time.

Unfortunately for him, the addition of pyrotechnics was just as bad as the idea of the Basement of Conveniently Placed Stakes and Sprinkler System, and everything quickly catches on fire with only one of the cultists infected. Murray rescues a still-asleep Jessica, and we get our confrontation. Dracula totally forgets the plague plot, van Helsing apparently is spry enough to jump out a second story window without any repercussions (but a cut guarantees we don't see it).

And Dracula is defeated by a shrub. No, seriously, he gets killed by a bush trying to get to van Helsing just because van Helsing keeps shouting his name. Because apparently hawthorn is really damaging to vampires, and he doesn't think to go around it? It's easily the most anticlimatic and least exciting of their confrontations. I know on paper it sounds really hilarious, but honestly? The pit trap in the last movie was a lot more fun.

So, yeah, have to say that this movie was a disappointment. After the audacious silliness and energy of 'Dracula A.D. 1972' I was really hoping for something equally fun. But this movie was front loaded with a boring spy 'thriller', and back-ended by a sci-fi plot about the radioactive super plague which somehow wasn't even stupid enough to be fun. There was one really solid scene, one moment between the two leads I'd been hoping for over multiple movies, but that was followed by the least fun confrontation, and an end that felt like, in more skilled directorial and writing hands, could have played out like a subversive tragedy.

Because that was how Cushing and Lee were clearly trying to play it. They were both tired of the chase, tired of repeating the same pattern again and again hoping for different results.

With a better, more self-aware script focused on that heart of the movie, I genuinely think this movie could have been incredible. This could have been a genuinely tragic swan-song to the series. This would be the final Dracula movie for both the leads, and it just sort of feels like a disappointment, all the more so for the inkling of what this could have been.

I hate that this one ends as a bit of a downer, especially after 'Dracula A.D. 1972' was such an unexpected delight. It was a breath of fresh air, and this movie just felt as tired as Dracula seemed in it. I feel like the treatment of Jessica really exemplifies that. In 'A.D. 1972' she was inexperienced but clever, young and fun and zesty. This movie makes her just someone there to deliver a few lines and scream. We don't get the character growth hinted at by making her a full researcher or letting her seem more mature, and Joanna Lumley's considerable talents were completely wasted. Why cast such a talented actress and then do nothing with her? Why finally allow van Helsing and Dracula to talk and do nothing with it beyond what the actors could conjure from thin air? Why actually touch on the tragedy of Dracula being dragged back from the dead again and again and AGAIN and not pay it off in a better, more satisfying way? You could have turned that confrontation into what would have been suicide-by-van-Helsing, make it a real tragedy for both of them, a moment of genuine understanding.

But no. This is a movie of poor writing, dull pacing, and wasted opportunity.

I'm hoping for something much stupider and much more fun next time. I had been meaning to save it for myself later in the run, but after this disappointment, screw it. Next time, we watch 'Horror Express', and hopefully that's as gloriously stupid and fun as 'Dracula A.D. 1972' was.

#the satanic rites of dracula #Christopher Lee #Peter Cushing #Joanna Lumley #this feels like a genuinely good movie trapped in the body of a painfully bad movie #this one wasn't even fun bad #it was just sort of dull #and really didn't embrace either extravagant cheese #or the tragedy that seemed hinted at in one glorious scene #because there is one great scene in this otherwise complete dud of a movie

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