#who the fuck is johanna
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Crash Out
Killjoy
(Content: drugs, noncon touching, physical violence, minor gore, allusions to past abuse)
The constant attempts on their life did not get in the way of partying. Music venues were a built-in part of the map Lorelai had constructed. She was still the one guiding their course. Even if she hadnât been, Paris wouldnât have objected. He needed somewhere to pick up from â and he felt less and less comfortable with the alleyway rendezvouses. They arrived at the function, outfits hastily assembled from the capsule theyâd been living out of. Under the DayGlo light, it all looked the same.
In the crowded warehouse, they could enter and exit each other orbits easily; some invisible line existed to tether them. Lorelai hung at his side for a moment, clinging to his arm She pointed to something in the crowd, stood up on her tiptoes to speak into his ear. The music mostly drowned it out.
All he heard was âfriendsâ and âmiddle schoolâ. Nothing could have held his interested less. He nodded, pushing her gently in their direction. She disappeared again. He had his own mission there anyway â seeing how much free shit he could score by pretended heâd never heard of drugs. Everyone was so eager to be someone elseâs first time. He found that he was enjoying parties a lot more when nobody there knew who he was. Theyâd believe anything the way he said it.
He was explaining to some stoners how heâd been born in a scorpions nest when the hair on the back of his neck stood up. He twisted around. The air in the room had become charged. It was the exact sensation that came when Deltaâs collar clicked off â the impulse of overgrown psychic energy. He had only ever felt it in the seconds before cataclysm. His body reacted out of habit, anticipating the whole scene to be rendered into wreckage. But the feeling lingered without striking.
He knew intuitively that she was the source of it. She didnât look any different than the others there, maybe a bit more muscular, a touch older. She wore fishnets over her legs and arms, just beneath the thin neon of her crop top and shorts. Her midriff was exposed; there was a bone piercing right through her belly button. Two long braids â pink and purple â went down her back and all the way to her knees. She danced carelessly, unbothered, bouncing up and down in between the clusters of people.Â
Psychics werenât that uncommon, but it was getting increasingly rare to see them walking around unfettered. All the higher level ones were getting snatched up for the war effort. The smart ones had made efforts to mask. Her aura wasnât as overpowering as Deltaâs had been â nothing was â but he could tell it wasnât weak. Still, nobody else seemed to notice. He figured repeated exposure had just made him sensitive to it.
He went back to lying to the stoners, trying to ignore the deep instinct that told him to take cover. He got bored of them, taking the one-hitter theyâd given him and moving on to find some new victim. In his drugged state, he almost forgot about her, his body gradually adapting to the sensation until he couldnât feel it anymore. Then it returned all at once.
âHey, cutie.â She grinned. He had been leaning back against the wall with his eyes to the crowd and still had not seen her approach until she was right in front of him. She leaned eagerly towards him, playfully running her hand along the purple plait of her hair. She was shorter up close than sheâd appeared to be from across the room. There was pale makeup on her face, covered up with brighter hues. She looked like a clown.
Slowed down some by the high, he did not immediately pull away when she slipped closed. Her hands ran over his shoulders and along his chest. He gave her an unamused look. She had to be fucked up. To be fair, he was too.
âMy name is Johanna,â she said it as if it was supposed to mean something to him. She didnât stop touching. Hooking just his thumbs around her wrists, he pushed her hands off. She was undeterred, letting them hang limply in his grasp. âWhatâs yours?â
âNot interested.â He said.
âHa! Ha ha. Ha. Thatâs a weird name.â Johanna winked. Her fingers brushed against the back of his hands, all curled up and poised like insect legs.Â
âCan you leave me the fuck alone?â He was visibly uncomfortable. He was certain if he let go of her wrists, sheâd try to feel up his chest again. It was fucking annoying. She had to be cracked.
She laughed. It was a low, wheezing sound. Her head rolled like it was about to come off her neck.
âYouâre not the brightest, are you, Your Highness?â
Paris closed his grip around her wrists, immediately switching their positions so that it was her back to the wall. He pinned her arms above her head in a swift and practiced motion.
âDonât. You wonât like how it ends.â He promised her.
She smiled as if in a daze.
It was his fault. Heâd leaned in too close. She took advantage, headbutting him hard.
If his nose wasnât broken before, it was now. He instinctively clutched at it. She took the opportunity to free her hands and shoved him backwards.
He was quicker this time than he had been, ready to brace against it. Her next hits fell ineffectively against the cage of his arms, missing his face. He swung at her just as she bent her torso backwards and drove her leg into his side. It was such an unnatural motion that heâd not been able to ward against it. He felt the full blow. She caught his outstretched wrist, trying to use the momentum against him, but it wasnât a perfect maneuver. They both ended up on the floor with no clear advantage one way or the over.Â
He drove his fist into the side of her face. She laughed stupidly, eating the punch. She crawled back up, almost quadrupedal in her movements. She punched him back. He didnât take it well; he was already bloodied. His knee landed up into the tender spot of her ribs. She laughed again. Even over the music, he could hear it was pained. He kicked her further back. She caught his ankle.
Lorelai suddenly appeared, all hurry-scurry. She was trying to separate them as if it was a bar fight, almost like sheâd been expecting it. He didnât have time to be offended. In spite of the fight response thatâd been triggered in him, he had the restraint to not strike out in her direction. Johanna didnât. She seemed both annoyed and amused at the intrusion, like a good joke at a bad time. Just as Paris was getting to his feet, she swept Lorryâs leg out from under her, her grin enormous. She yelped in surprise, landing hard on her hip. Johanna made as if to stand and nearly got there.
He drew the sword on her. It didnât matter that she was unarmed. She was an off leash psychic. He wasnât about to play around with that. He swung it down, leaving a bright red slash along her torso. She fell back into the wall.
Screams, immediately. Theyâd been there before, but they only got louder after that. Johanna had seen him draw the sword, but she stared back at him with a dumbstruck expression, like she hadnât expected him to actually use it. Lorelai shared in her surprise. He realized her scream had been among the many. Way to crash the party.
He pulled Lorelai off of the ground, making for the exit. His head was a mess of chemicals. Too easy. Too easy. He pushed the barn doors open, stepping out into the cool night air. Too easy. He walked further out into the night, far away from the warehouse. Sheâd been a psychic, but she hadnât fought like one. She only used her body. It had almost been a bar fight. Why hadnât she done anything else? What the fuck just happened? Who the fuck even was that?
âParis, let go!â Lorelaiâs voice cut through his thoughts with sudden urgency.
He looked down to find heâd grabbed her wrist instead of her hand.
He dropped it.
âYou fucking stabbed her?â Lorelai screamed.
âSlashed,â he corrected, blinking back to reality, âShe was a bounty hunter. Sheâll survive.â
It surprised him how level his voice was. He didnât feel it.
From the other side of the field, the barn doors creaked open. The music poured out from inside, then faded away as it was slammed back shut. He whipped around, anticipating some security force. The mafia, if they were really unlucky. But they could both make out her silhouette even in the dark night. Blood poured off her body in rivulets. She was walking again. She was supposed to live, she wasnât supposed to walk.
âGet in.â Paris said, not taking his eyes off the approaching form. Lorelai scrambled up into the ship, slamming her keys in the ignition. The shipâs lights flooded the plain and the figure came into full resolution.Â
She smiled. Beneath the slash in her shirt and along her midriff, the gore glistened and glowed. It moved all on its own. He watched as the strands of flesh crawled over the gap he had left inside. Her skin methodically stitched itself back up. She smiled wider as their eyes met.
Lorelaiâs hand found his collar, roughly tugging him into motion. He was sure he wouldnât have been able to move if she hadnât. He climbed up into the passenger seat. The ship rocked from how hard he slammed the door shut.
But Johanna wasnât moving with any urgency, not before or after the ship was in motion. He could still see her slow and deliberate approach even as they pulled away. She extended her left arm up. It shifted the flesh of her torso, disrupting the healing process. It must have been worth it to her. She waved them goodbye very cheerfully. Her smile didnât falter for a second.
âŚâŚ.
tags:
@catnykit @snakebites-and-ink @vivulapom @scoundrelwithboba @whatwhump
@pumpkin-spice-whump @deluxewhump @fuckass1000 @fuckcapitalismasshole @defire
@micechomper
#whump#whump scenario#whump prompt#whump writing#whumper turned whumpee#drugs#physical violence#minor gore#past abuse#crash out#paris#lorelai#delta (mentioned)#johanna#jojo :D !!!!!#who the fuck is johanna
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on a scale of Warden Antoine to Johanna Hezenkoss, how many problems is that mad scientist in The Veilguard causing?
#love how everyone in the game has such like research and science and gathering intel vibe. everyone in this game is a fucking nerd.#including the companions you don't really expect to be people who poke around in the libraries and archives and have research notes.#there being so many researchers and scientists and academics and research inclined tho means many are mad scientists. which is so fun#Antoine Dragon Age#Antoine Ivo#Johanna Hezenkoss#Dragon Age: The Veilguard#Dragon Age The Veilguard#Dragon Age#DATV spoilers#DATV things#Veilguard spoilers#datv#Veilguard
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You guys ever think about the fact that Astrid was willing to die for Johanna without a second thought. Do you ever think about the fact that she would've. And she wouldn't for a second have regretted it. Do you ever think about how she missed out on so much of her niece's life, tucked away in Toføten and leaving her all alone not because she didn't care, but because she cared SO much. She couldn't leave those mounds for more than a few days to visit, because they frighten her baby niece, so someone's got to keep watch. Even if she knows nothing will come out, she'll make a thousand charms to keep her safe. Even if they wont work all the way out there in Trolberg or the wilderness, because that little girl is all she has left and she's so small and she needs her protecting. And the years have gone by and she can count on one hand the amount of times she's held her in her arms since her parents died but she's still so small. She's towering over her but she's still so small. Those fairy mounds still scare her and they scare Astrid too. She'll miss out on her life in a heartbeat if it means she gets to live it peacefully. Lose her if it means she gets to protect her. Die if it means she gets to live. Do you ever think about them.
#hilda#hilda the series#netflix hilda#hilda netflix#hilda season 3#hilda season 3 spoilers#hilda spoilers#hilda johanna#johanna hilda#aunt astrid#aunt astrid hilda#hilda aunt astrid#astrid hilda#hilda astrid#textpost#like oh my god#mother figure/daughter relationships in hilda my absoloute fucking beloved#fuck anyone who hates astrid btw my girl did her absoloute best#AUGHHHH
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thinking about Annie Cresta again
#living in district four ie the fishing district so obviously a district with alot of water and developing a fear of water after her games#OH MY GOD.#having Finnick - the only person who was able to calm her down when she went a little bit crazy DIE#AND ALSO#in her games she watched her district partner get decapitated FUCKING FINNICK GOT HIS HEAD BITTEN OFF FIRST I AM SICK.#having seen the broadcasted message that finnick was dead when he wasnt really#finding out later that almost everyone who had been proclaimed dead wasnt and Finnick was#SICK.#having a child that is so reminiscent of Finnick that he serves as a reminder of all that she lost#MAKES ME FUCKING SICKKKKK.#anyway i think Johanna helped her cope in d13 and also helps with the baby back in d4#I LOVE YOU ANNIE CRESTA YOU MAKE ME SICK IN THE HEAD#thg#suzanne collins#annie cresta#milo scribbles
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I try to be all let people do fandom how they want but oh boy. The bad takes everywhere about beetee and wiress. Stumbled on a reddit thread saying beetee's a mary sue whose only trait is being smart like.... get away from my man actually! People who think wiress has to be brain damaged and is unable to have any "normal" social interaction?? Literally how is it possible to misunderstand them so badly its not even like there's a million words of layered complexity to sift through a lot of it is explicitly stated/shown in the tiny amount of time the narrative gives to both of them. (And the way they're both commonly erased from the Quell alliance ugh.)
THIS!!! oh my god i will never not be mad about the common misinterpretations in this fandom. like of course wiress was having trouble communicating, she was literally going through possibly the worst thing that ever happened to her AGAIN. yes beetee is mainly characterized as being smart but thatâs because heâs a side character with not much information on him, not because heâs a mary sue. like are we idiots. have we learned nothing in english class.
#dayne answers#and them being taken out of the quarter quell alliance⌠oh do not even get me started#if i see one more tiktok edit of katniss peeta johanna and finnick labeled as the golden alliance i will kill someone#like btw⌠there were more people in that#and we canât even just blame it on the movies because beetee and wiress were in those too#i think itâs honestly about conventionally attractive actors. like yes jeffrey and amanda are gorgeous people but they were older#and not as pretty as jennifer josh sam and jena#which is honestly so disgusting. this is quite literally a franchise about children fighting to the death and then the one who survives#being forced into prostitution. get over yourselves.#itâs like the inherent sexualization of finnickâs character which i could talk for fucking days about#this is why i try to keep my hcs very neutral#like yes i could talk about what i believe beeteeâs stance on the rebellion was and what made him finally join#or i could tell you his favorite color is blue. your choice.#itâs scary out here.#thg#the hunger games#wiress thg#wiress#wiress lisiecki#dayneâs wiress thoughts (TM)#beetee latier#dayneâs beetee tag#beetress
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Happy lesbian visibility week to The Lesbian to ever exist. Johanna they could never make me hate you bbygirl
My wife<3
#lilly talks#johanna mason#the hunger games#thg#want her to fuck me until I canât walk right for a month#huh who said that#Johanna pls hit me w ur axe#Iâm begging#Iâd let her do disgusting things to me itâs actually an issue
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Are you guys ever watching something and you get so distracted because the actor is so pretty?
This is such an intense and dramatic moment. The Doctor is about to be shot out of the sky by someone disguised as his companion while on the phone with the imposter. The music is blaring, the tension is rising, and my dumbass audibly exclaims "Sheâs so pretty!" when it cuts to this shot EVERY TIME I WATCH IT! It is pathetic!
It's like watching a car crash and getting distracted because the tree that the car is about to hit is really pretty.
#jenna coleman#jenna louise coleman#clara oswald#clara oswin oswald#oswin oswald#doctor who#pretty actress#I'm ace#what the fuck is wrong with me#this only happens with Jenna Coleman#like is Johanna Constantine supposed to be an asshole because her face is too distracting#johanna constantine#horney jail?#idk#i was 12 when this aired so maybe that's it?#series 12#dr who#why am i making this post#this feels out of character but I really want to know if this is normal
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When it seemed like Johanna was going to choose to stay in Fairy Country, my first thought was Hilda just 2 episodes before going âdonât let go of me, Mum!â
#an idiot talks#hilda#hilda the series#hilda spoilers#hilda johanna#like that broke me when i watched it#and then johanna wanting to be w her parents. that was my first thought#literally told this to my sib as we watched and went âis johanna gonna let go of her this time?â#also unrelated but we were watching and i went âlol imagine if when they leave the island johanna immediately gets sickâ#AND GUESS WHO FUCKING CALLED IT LMAO
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remember when i said most of this nonsense started because i liked burn's voice? ...yeh.
#burn gorman#gods the first time I listened to this it was like 4am I died a little#richard earl#Eleanor Jackson#dr. john watson#dr. Johanna Watson#inspector lestrade#or is it? đ#war master#doctor who#big finish audios#escape from reality#the adventure of the deceased doctor#sherlock Holmes au#man I need a tag for burn now fuck#shut up ace#the burn collection#fic ideas#<- tbqh I had like five different newmann ideas inspired by this audio it's insane#mr. gorman your influence...#'excellent work doctor...'#jsifj3#heowbxuene????
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more asoiaf comparisons, parallels & antiparallels to the first dance of the dragons vs the second & final dance of the dragons (& possibly the sixth blackfyre rebellion): the blacks being daenerys i targaryen's supporters, the golds being aegon vi targaryen's supporters, tommen baratheon being a close equivalent to gaemon palehair & his mother essie & sylvenna sand which may be interpreted as a parallel with queen cersei lannister & taena merryweather of myr, trystane truefyre being a close equivalent to aegon/young griff & perkin being jon connington & the shepherd being the new high septon the high sparrow, dalton greyjoy being euron i greyjoy's ancestor & the latter surpassing him, alyn waters later alyn velaryon resembling aurane waters later aurane velaryon & finishing what their ancestors started. history repeats itself.
#LIKE!!!! LOOK AT THE PARALLELS BRUH#it kinda makes me wonder who the hightowers would support this time...#its literally so wild how history repeats itself#i think the lannisters would support aegon after he takes king's landing bc they're lowkey fucked either way.#cersei lannister's probably either in hiding at casterly rock or will end up as aegon's political prisoner. maybe jaime too idk.#i have no idea who would lead the lannisters on the side of the golds now that kevan's dead killed by varys tho... maybe genna lannister?#cersei jaime & tyrion's aunt? to parallel johanna lannister who attacked the ironborn like a boss bitch??#i personally predict aegon'll marry sansa who would have the north the riverlands & the vale at her backâit'd be arranged by baelish & varys#i also think it's possible he'd take arianne martell as another wife to parallel aegon & his wives visenya & rhaenys.#so by taking sansa & arianne as his wives & queens both of whom are well beloved in their countries he'd restore honor to their houses.#bc aerys & later the baratheon dynasty was a terrible time for the starks & the martells so he brings the north & dorne back into the fold.#so by marrying sansa he honors & respects her given her past betrothal to joffrey & forced marriage to tyrion & mending what aerys did#particularly to her grandfather rickard stark & her uncle brandon stark & to her aunt lyanna stark.#& by marrying arianne he's restoring honor to house martell considering all the bs his mother elia martell experienced in king's landing.#(whether elia actually Is his mother or who he perceives her to be) & restoring the line of succession again in dornish hands#& they'd probably marry him on the condition that the northerners & dornish gets special rights & privileges that others don't.#& not to mention that the targaryens starks & martells have a common enemy.#polygamy's a big nono in the faith of the seven but that didn't stop aegon & his wives & im sure after everything w/ the faith rn??#w/ cersei & the sparrows?? & considering aegon's actually a decent person & he'll be foreshadowed to be popular & loved??#i don't think most would bat an eye tbh. i actually think daenerys would wanna talk to aegon first tho.#then everything & everyone around them goes to shit & they end up fighting bc like. daenerys wants SO BADLY to have a family.#so like i don't see her immediately perceiving aegon as a threat.#the starks & most of the north would prolly be wary of dany @ 1st due to aerys & having a MASSIVE army w/ three dragons until the long night#except for like. maybe jon. but anyway the martells could be slightly wary of dany bc of what happened with quentyn in meereen.#idk maybe there's a division in the north & dorne. i think sansa & arianne would actually get along personally.#anyway im presuming stannis is gonna be at the nightfort & i personally don't think he's ever gonna come south again. he'll die at the wall.#ooc.
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fuck you if you celebrate the death of any teenage girl in media, especially at the hands of the male villain or protagonist, fuck you right to hell
idc if sheâs annoying the deaths of girls in most shows are so often unfair and undignified and not given the weight they should have been and then when fandom makes it worse by saying they Deserved it I want to start killing
fuck you fuck you fuck you
#johanna posting#yeah this is about jjk#specifically hanako and mimiko#but nobara too#this show hates women and the fandom does too#i hope sukana fans who liked the deaths of the twins get shot in the face#i hope nobara comes back and kills him#or maki#those are getos kids they didnât even chose this life they just wanted his body to be laid to rest fuck you fuck you fuck you#their deaths are an accessory to sukanas power#an attestment to what happens to girls who get too cocky in this world and to add to itadoris breakdown#nobaras death served the same purpose with a different killer
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Bro you reblogging the strugglewoman post with Kaisa reminded me of a Reflection I was having these days. You know how Hilda artists will make Kaisa fanart and say sheâs a âwoman kisserâ? Iâm pretty sure Iâve seen at least three fanarts like that. And I was thinking that itâs so funny because, yes, in theory they are right, she sure would kiss women. But have you seen her? Like actually seen her in all her season 2 glory? That woman is not pulling. You think she approaches women? You think she flirts like a well collected person? You think she actually goes out to meet people? Nah man I know a girlfailure when I see one and thatâs what it looks like. We need more lesboloser Kaisa truthers because we are right
-đđ
CRYING YES YOUâRE SO RIGHT. I think Kaisaâs life long goal is to some day hold another womanâs hand, sheâs not got kissing a woman on her list of goals bc she doesnât wanna set an unreasonable expectation for herself
#johanna meets her one time and fulfills that goal by just#grabbing her hand so she can drag her off to show something#and Kaisa just blue screens because what the fuck. life goal complete. now what#this is so much further than she ever thought sheâd get#also ur fics that have Victoria and Kaisa as best friends have infested my brain and now theyâre evrything to me. and now all I can imagine#is Kaisa jokingly describing herself as a girl kisser to Victoria#who looks her up and down and goes âyou WISH you were a girl kisserâ#the only reason Kaisa seems cool is bc weâre seeing her from the perspective of a pre-teen girl. SHE IS A GIRLFAILURE!!#ALSO LESBOLOSER TOOK ME OUT AJDBSJFBSF#Johanna thinks sheâs so cool and no one has the heart to tell her the truth#hilda the series#netflix hilda#hilda netflix#hilda#ask#smart-heart#hilda kaisa#Kaisa hilda
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sometimes u put yr playlist on shuffle a song comes up and you have to put another song in the queue immediately as soon as it comes on bc it makes you think of that song
#this is abt aura by ghost and pals Sry everytime i hear it im like a fiddle This is just like devil went down to georgia and then i have to#put devil went down to georgia in the queue#i think its a fiddle innit.. it sounds like a fiddle but im also NOTORIOUSLY bad at telling instruments apart. <- guy who once couldnt tell#if something was a guitar or a piano i actually rly rly rly rly dont wanna get into it okay.#i guess you didnt know it but i am a fiddle player too đđ#sry. the other thing this post is abt is kiss me and ladies in their sensibilities sweeney. obviously those r connected#but if ladies in their sensibilities comes on by itself i quite literally couldnt be assed so everytime i have to put kiss me on instead an#add lits to the queue. bc them together is like the best song i ever heard its just that the beginning of lits is just kind of boring It#does get stuck i my head sometimes but the supreme part is the end thats Basically just a reprise of kiss me#but also theyre kind of the same song anyways at least o wowww i was just typing in tempo with the fiddle that was awesome. at least on the#2012 soundtrack aka the best one talk to the hand or dont i dont wanna hear it. well i do want to hear it it being the 2012 london cast#recording of sweeney todd starring michael ball and imelda staunton. ANYWAYS!! in that one the songs lead in to eachother#ive listened to all the other soundtracks but idr if they do that.. well ill tell u the movie doesnt bc it doesnt have kiss me. which is#just so. the johanna anthony romance doesnt rly have much substance in the first place and yr taking away like. their duet together. ok....#AND yr taking away the end part of lits? the best part of that song? whatever its fine its fine.#if anybody is curious my ranking of casts is 2012 > obc > movie > 2006 i fucking hate 2006 or 2005 or whatever i hate it sm it makes my#blood literally boil im sry. i fucking LOATHE it idk what it is well i do but this post is already 5000000 years long. idt the new one is#out fully yet... i was ok with the songs i have heard but idk where id rank it yet. i should prolly check if the full things out yet omg so#me and my lampstie (way of saying my siblings name if theres something deeply wrong with you) can listen :]
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I love how Johanna in every post-mockingjay baby book fic is just
#including the piss epilogue heehee ;)#except when itâs like. in an ableist way which Iâve seen lol#Johanna isnât there bc Annie is a Dumb Disabled Person who canât be trusted to raise her son. sheâs there bc theyâre fucking.#like theyâre Lezzing Out#thg
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Bruhhhhhh I thought she was gonna say fairies are forbidden to teach humans or something so she'd have to break the rules to be his mentor and risk being outcasted. Something like that. I didn't know she was a whole ass traitor.
#I'm like...too shocked to be mad rn#This whole time... literally everything in this book was a lie#All that fucking training#All the times we spent together#I'M SO FHDHSJKA#She was the only person who ever treated him like an actual person and believed in him (besides Johanna) I'M UPSET#EDIT: Okay bow that I finished the book FUCK HER#I thought she would feel remorse later on or sacrifice herself for him or some shit shejsk NAH#She got WORSE#lmaoooo#Fairy Eris
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if i think about BAON for more then two seconds i go crazy sorry. i really did do that
#the fact nimat isnt even a major player in the first game is so criminal its insane < the writer who planned that#the fact i have to withhold information for a satisfactory climax is crazy. why can i not beam into my audiences head how self serving and#fucked johanna is#(i lobe herâŚ)
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