#who knows! maybe i'm not looking hard enough
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hello! hope you’re okay after the ending, honestly I don’t think any of us are.
I wanted to request a rafe x pogue reader where it’s that boat storm scene and instead of Sarah falling it’s reader and she’s just drowning and Rafe jumps in after her. He doesn’t know why he did it but he just has a soft spot for her and it’s just really angsty but also cute.
thanks! I love your account btw!
In The Sea
Summery: the anon
Words: 2.5k
Warnings: grammar mistakes
A\N: thank you to everyone who has been requesting it makes me very happy xxx
You stand at the edge of the deck, clutching the railing as the boat rocks, waves rolling against the hull. The salty breeze whips your hair around your face, and the peaceful ocean sounds made you think about the current situation.
You didn't expect Rafe to save you and your friends from being arrested, much less expect him to find a boat big and resistant enough to drive you all to Morocco Africa to find the blue crown. It was truly a surprise considering you and Rafe's history.
“So what? Are we just on our way to Africa now?” Kiara asked the group as if she couldn't believe that Rafe Cameron was willingly helping them.
“Quick little weekend trip?” She added to her previous sentence.
“What about Rafe? We know what he did to the cross and now we want to go after the crown with him?” You and the rest of the pogue's lips go into a thin line at the memory.
“Sarah, you're his family, how do deal with him” John B said, finding no other options.
“I don't- I don't know, I think maybe y/n might have a chance of convincing him to behave but..” she shrugged and you felt the stares of your friends burn holes through you. Your past relationship with him was a secret to nobody.
“We- we just have to talk to him, or at least try” You proposed earning a frown from JJ.
“Talk to Rafe? When has he ever just communicated with us?”
“Talking to him is the only option we have, but you're definitely not talking with him,” John B said and as expected everyone nodded and hummed, agreeing. JJ was in no place to talk with Rafe.
“Why not? What did I do?” He asked, getting almost frustrated.
“We all know you and him are far from being civil, the last thing we need is you triggering him and causing trouble” His girlfriend, Kiara, tried to explain the easiest way but he still got defensive. After a couple of bickering from JJ and John b You finally decide to go speak with him, who was driving the boat not too far away from the deck.
“Hey,” You knock on the metal and rusted door before entering and walking up to him. His eyes catch yours and there's a tension between the two of you. But Rafe only tilts his head to acknowledge you.
You swallow, feeling the weight of his stare. "We just want to talk," you say, steadying your voice as the rest of your friends beside JJ follow behind you.
“All right let's talk” Rafe chuckles, and it’s low, almost a whisper.
Your mind goes almost blank as you take him in, you haven't been this close since you were forced in the same room by Sighs men last year. You had almost forgotten how much you missed him.
“You guys be cool I'll be cool” His voice snapped you out of your daydream, realizing you had missed a bit of the conversation.
“So now you want peace?” Pope leaned back and scoffed, not believing a word that came out of his mouth.
“I just saved all your asses, how about a thank you?” He glanced at all of you one by one, but he only earned silence,
“Listen I don't want any part of your little fairytale treasure hunt bullshit, I'm just looking for Groff” He’s breathing heavily, holding himself back from adding more snark,
“Hey, Rafe!” Before anyone can react, JJ’s fist flies through the air, cracking against Rafe’s jaw with a force that echoes.
Rafe’s head snaps back, his expression stunned for a split second before he crumples, hitting the hard metal floor. For a moment, everyone is frantic, staring at the lifeless form sprawled across the floor, his eyes closed, completely knocked out.
“holy shit”
“Jesus JJ what's your problem”
“Whoo that felt good” Tired of JJ's crazy actions the girls walk away shaking their heads in disbelief until you are the only one staying behind.
JJ stands over him, breathing heavily, the adrenaline still pulsing through him as he looks down at Rafe. His fist is red, already bruising, but he doesn’t seem to care.
“What is wrong with you?” You look at him, feeling a rush of shock mixed with panic. You fall to your knees next to Rafe and quickly look over his injuries, softly rubbing your thumb on his jaw. “If he didn't do it I was going to do it” Pope added only worsening the situation. You shook your head and furrowed your eyebrows at his sentence.
After the pogues agreed it was probably not a good idea to let Rafe free in case he woke up and decided to shoot you all with his “peacemaker” you tied him up in a small cabin. His head hung low, his wrists were bound to a stainless steel pole and his legs were uncomfortably folded beneath him. Your heart clenched at the sight of him but still decided to leave him there until he woke up.
You open the door to the cabin slowly with a tray of warmed-up canned spaghetti in hand, it wasn't the best but it was all the boat had.
“I brought you food..” You whispered before bending down to place the tray in front of him.
“great” he sighed.
“I found aspirin in the medicine cabinet, I figured you'd have a headache, maybe even a concussion”
“Right… are you gonna throw it in my mouth like a seal or something” He scoffed again clearly angered,
“They don't trust you Rafe… but if you do the right thing maybe they will open up a little bit”
“I am doing the right thing! I helped you” He tried pulling against the restraints but failed.
“I know okay? I know but unfortunately, I don't have a choice but to let you in here until we get there, I'm sorry” you whispered and pushed the tray closer to him. “Please eat,” You said and left closing the large door behind you.
For a moment you stayed behind the door listening closely. “Y/N come back!” he grunts and kicks his feet on the ground. “Fucking untie me please!!” he screamed and you jumped when you heard the tray you had just put down on the floor fly into the wall.
Pope leaning over the side, is the first to spot the flicker of movement beneath the water. "Guys! I see one!" exclaims, his voice a mixture of excitement and focus. He scrambles for the fishing rod, almost knocking over the tackle box in his rush.
John B is right beside him, laughing. “We've got our dinner!" he laughs.
“Guys, this one’s huge!” Kie giggles with the boys knowing we were all set for dinner time tonight.
You all spent the rest of the day cooking the fish you caught and preparing side dishes with some good music in the background.
Until it was time for Rafa's second meal.
You open the door carefully and his eyes catch yours, this time you don't speak, simply set the tray of seasoned salmon down in front of him.
Has you were about to close the door you hear him.
“Wait, y/n. Can you please- can you give me the fork” his tone is much softer than before so you can't deny him.
You get down and pick up the utensil his bound hands couldn’t reach.
“Thank you” He murmured, and you barely heard him as you closed the door behind you once again.
The sky darkens ominously as thunder rumbles in the distance, low and threatening. Waves crash harder against the hull of the boat, tossing it with a force that leaves you gripping onto anything within reach. The storm monitor flashes red to show the storm coming ahead of you.
“That's not good,” John B says.
“We're gonna have to try to blast through it,” Pope says, not finding any better options.
“Why can't we go south?” Kie asks genuinely.
“The current is gonna be against us we don't have a choice” John B agreed even after trying to find safer options, the boat's roar has Pope push the lever controlling the engine to the max.
The waves make the boat shift side to side making it difficult to stay up and steady.
Another massive wave crashes over the side, drenching them all, and you lose your footing, sliding across the deck until Kie grabs your arm, pulling you back.
“Hold on to something” Kie yells at you pope and Sarah and you all grip onto the nearest thing.
“Hey!” a distant voice echoes through the walls.
“Cut me loose! Y/N! Somebody!” Rafe screamed and banged his fists on the wall.
“Get me out of here!” Everyone listens but doesn't move a finger.
“We have to let him out” You scramble to your feet but jerk back when Cleo grabs your wrist.
“No!” she says trying to stop you but you pulled back.
“He's gonna drown” You pull open rapidly the drawers trying to find something sharp, able to cut the thick ropes wrapped around Rafe's hands.
The storm is relentless, its fury tossing you around like a rag doll as you try to reach him.
You cling to the railing, struggling to stay upright as the boat lurches violently, nearly sending you sprawling across the floor. Your legs buckle under you. You come crashing through the door and walk onto the water-soaked floor knife in hand.
“Cut me loose” he begs.
Crouching in front of him you began frantically cutting the rope. Your muscles burn with how much pressure you're using.
“Shit,” You say when a sudden jerk of the boat makes your face come inches apart from his, lips almost touching. You don't have time to think as you regain your balance and continue cutting the bounds.
“There! Come on” you yelled and quickly grasped his hands to pull him up from the floor.
You both run to shelter but the boat jerks side to side even more violently,
“Something is wrong I have to go see!”
“No!” Rafe tried holding on to you but you were already rushing away onto the deck where waves came crashing, a massive wave rose out of the dark, towering over the boat like a shadow.
You barely had time to think before it crashed down, an icy, unforgiving wall of water that slammed into you with the force of a sledgehammer. The impact was too strong and you were thrown backward, landing hard on the deck. Pain explodes through your shoulder, the wind knocks from your lungs. Dazed and gasping, you try to get up, but the boat tips again, and before you can stand, another wave strikes.
This one is worse, merciless, catching you just as you struggle to rise. Your fingers graze the edge of the railing, but the slick metal slips through your grasp. In an instant, the world spins as you are thrown away from the boat, the cold, raging ocean swallowing you whole.
The water is a shock, freezing and chaotic, disorienting you as you plunge beneath the surface. You thrash, fighting to reach the surface, lungs burning, but the waves toss you back and forth, each effort to rise met with another rush of icy water.
Back on the boat, Rafe catches a glimpse of you disappearing over the side, and his heart stops. “Y/N!” he screams, panic cutting through the storm. Without a second thought, he scrambles to the railing, nearly slipping himself as he peers out into the dark, searching for any sign of you.
“Where is she!” Sarah came rushing to her brother
“She fell overboard” he yells already reaching for a rope with the floating boyee. He’s soaked, exhausted, and barely steady, but there’s no hesitation as he jumps in after you.
“Rafe no!” She screams after her brother.
A wave slams into Rafe. “Y/N!!” he yells in the water as he sees you trying to stay above the water far away.
With the last of your strength, You swim faster and harder towards Rafe and reach out when you're near, fingers brushing his arm, grasping it tight. Rafe holds you with everything he has.
“I got you” But you don't hear him in the storm.
You both hold on to each other your arms around his neck and his around your waist as the boat floats away and the night turns into a void.
“Hey, open your eyes, look at me” You feel gentle hands grasping on your face as you finally sit up coughing out the water that filled your lungs.
“That's it” The hands rub your back in a comforting way.
The sand is hot beneath you, warming up your skin, and with exhaustion, you fall onto Rafe's chest.
“Hey you okay?” panicked, he grabs onto your shoulder and pushes you a little bit to take a good look at your face.
“You jumped after me,” you whispered.
“Of course I did” You look up at him, heart pounding, feeling a rush of gratitude, fear, and something deeper—something that’s been smouldering beneath the surface, unspoken, for far too long. Your eyes shine with tears, not sad and not happy either but grateful.
His hand reaches up, brushing a strand of wet hair from your face, his fingers lingering against your skin. His touch is warm, and grounding, and you feel your heart racing even faster under his gaze, intense and unreadable, like he’s seeing you for the first time.
Without another thought, you lean in, closing the space between the two of you as you press your lips to his, a spark igniting into a wildfire the moment you connect. Rafe’s surprise melts away instantly, and he kisses back, fierce and unrestrained, his hands finding your waist.
The kiss is charged, fueled by adrenaline, and a longing that neither of you can deny any longer. Your hands find his shoulders, clinging to him, grounding you in his warmth, his strength, the feel of his heartbeat thundering beneath your touch.
Rafe’s fingers trail up your back, sending shivers along your spine, and his lips move against yours with an urgency that speaks of everything left unspoken.
When you finally pull apart, breathless, Rafe’s forehead rests against yours, his eyes searching yours as he lets out a shaky laugh, almost in disbelief.
“You saved my life” you smile, brushing a thumb over his cheek, still feeling the warmth of his kiss lingering on your lips. “I love you, I've always loved you” you whisper, and before you know it, you're kissing again, the ocean waves crashing nearby, the world forgotten as you lose yourselves in each other.
“I never stopped loving you,” he whispered.
Send request xxx
#rafe fanfiction#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#rafe outer banks#outer banks#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron x pogue!reader#rafe cameron#rafe obx
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Arcane Characters Make Food for You
Pairing: Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Maddie, Ekko, Vander, Silco, Sevika, Viktor, Jayce, Mel x Fem!Reader
Tags: fluff, established relationship, domestic fluff, kissing, making food, teasing
Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters
A/N: I already wrote this on my old blog but now is a good time to re-write it.
Jinx knows how to cook pretty well, surprisingly enough. Or maybe not so surprisingly given how she's always the one making things and experimenting. However that also means she might make some really weird meals.
It's something you'll have to deal with if you're with her and might have to develop a strong stomach. She already has it because she grew up in Zaun and ate a lot of different things. For you she wouldn't recommend some of them yet and she will try her best to make something that you'll like. And she won't get too offended if you don't eat her cooking right away.
"I made ya some breakfast, ta-da! It's a little sticky but don't worry, eat your fill and I'll clean up the mess later. Don't look at it like that, it might not look pretty but I promise ya it's so good. I could eat this every day. I hope I'll get to eat it together it with ya every day, sugar."
Vi doesn't know how to cook because she never had the opportunity to learn. The first few dishes are bad, like really bad, almost burn the toast and eggs type of bad but Vi she isn't the kind of person to give up. She'll keep trying until she gets it right.
There have been times where she did burn things and she won't let you eat it since it's not right. She wants you to have the best of the best, even if she didn't. Might get a little distracted when you're in the kitchen with her so she prefers to cook by herself even if you're there with her. Regardless of how many times she gets it wrong she at least wants to learn to cook your favorite.
"Yes, this is burned toast but this time it's not my fault, it's yours. Well you're the one who walked in here looking all cute and distracted me. One kiss is all it takes if it's from you, sweet stuff. Sit down and let me do this right and if you do you'll get something sweeter than this."
Caitlyn knows how to cook really well. She did grow up with people doing the cooking for her however she was curious and wanted to learn how to do it on her own. She's a very hand-on learner, now she can use some of her skills to make you happy.
She gets up really early anyways so she might as well make breakfast for the both of you. The first time she brings you breakfast in bed she thinks your reaction is cute, the way you stare at her, eyes wide and drooling over the food. For her it's not odd to have breakfast in bed. And if you stick with her you'll get used to her pampering you. Be sure to tell her how the food tastes.
"Good morning, darling, I brought you something. See, I didn't just brag about my cooking skills, this is me showing you I can cook. Showing off? Suppose I am a little bit, it's not my fault you didn't really think I would bring you breakfast in bed."
Maddie can cook some dishes but she can cook them well. Her skills aren't anything impressive but they don't need to be because she can get take out too. But she is more than happy to share what ever she makes with you.
She falls back on take out more often than she would like to admit. However not when she invites you over to her place, then she will put her best foot forward. A lot of that is because she wants to impress you hard, but it also gets her to work on her skills either way she wins. She keeps looking at you very intently while you take that first bite. Thankfully she doesn't seem to do a bad job if your smile is anything to go by.
"I'm not weird for watching you eat, it's called being smitten, gorgeous. Anything you do is interesting to me, you know that by now. This isn't empty flattery. I already got you to eat my cooking, I don't need to butter you up at this point."
Ekko isn't the best cook out there, he will be completely honest with you. While he does know the basic things you can't really expect anything fancy. If anything he focuses more on the dish being filling than tasty.
The thing about him cooking for the two of you is that he can only do it on his free time, which isn't a lot. Therefore he wants to make it a bonding activity. A cute date of sorts, mostly in the late evening when the rest of work is done. Sometimes he will try to surprise you but its hard when his living space isn't that big and everyone knows everything in the Firelights. The gesture counts.
"There wasn't much time so it's pretty simple, but at least it's your favorite, Firefly. No, I actually finished the new project, I had extra time to kill. Please, don't thank me! It seemed only right for me to make you something after you cheered me up this morning."
Vander knows how to cook really, really well. He kids to raise, and he was on his own for a very long time, he had to become a good cook. Plus he makes awesome drinks, being a good cook was a bonus skill for him.
He's always the first one to wake up and start the day in the Last Drop and he always makes breakfast for everyone. Not just breakfast but every meal, his kids need to eat a lot, there's always a little left over for later. Even if he feels a little sleepy himself he at least wants to put something on the table. It's the dad instincts in him. And husband instincts, hopefully.
"Don't ya even think about sneaking up on me right now, darlin'. I've got a pan full of sizzling hot oil in my hand, I don't want it all over us. Hugs are fine, I always love ya being close to me, but keep your hands to yourself. We both know ya get handsy in the morning."
Silco didn't know how to cook before he adopted Jinx, since then he's had to learn. It wasn't easy but now he does know a lot and he can impress the woman he's dating. Now when you stay over you can expect good for for your date, and good food when you wake up.
When the dating gets more serious he lets you help him cook, but until then he pretty much does it on his own. Jinx will go nowhere near the kitchen alone, not after that one explosion. He does have a list of recipes that he makes the most. And a few that he made up. Sometimes ingredients are hard to come by so he needs to improvise.
"Pass me the flour would you, love? This time I will follow the recipe, yes, the last time there was a bit too much sugar in there. I know you liked it but it's not the healthiest thing now is it? Fine, call me a worried dad, I know you think it's attractive."
Sevika isn't able too cook that well, she never was, she always liked others cooking for her though. However when you tease her about it she takes it as a challenge. And you know damn well that she doesn't back down from a challenge.
Curses a lot when she messes up, though you can bet that she's not gonna let food be the thing that beats her. When you walk into the kitchen it's a mess which will take a while to clean up. But at least she managed to make the dish this time and it's quite good. For her hard work you give her a very passionate kiss and that just makes her wanna work harder. That's the best reward she can ask for.
"One kiss for at that work, doll? I think I earned myself a little more than that, maybe you on the table instead of all this food. Yeah, I know it's gonna get cold, you're right. Can't let all this hard work go to waste, but when we're done we have to work all that food off."
Viktor doesn't have as much time to cook as he could if he worked a bit less. Not that his skills are award worthy but he can make a few things, at least in his opinion. Give his cooking a chance.
When he was a student in the academy he had to learn how to make quick meals and that is where most of his strength is. Just very simple dishes but he knows how to make them well. There are times when he himself forgets to eat so he makes sure he gets a good meal when he can. If you're part of that that's even better. Having you eat his cooking makes cooking more fun.
"If you think cooking this is so easy then you make it will you, beautiful? Ah so now you like it, I see how it is. I'm just kidding, I love making food for you when I can. But if you want to make it yourself please let me do a taste test first. I promise to be brutally honest, just like you are with me."
Jayce has absolutely no skills in the kitchen unless you need him to fix or build things in there. He knows this too and will admit it right away. Trust him he is much better in science than in cooking food.
That being said he will join you in the kitchen when you cook. He takes an interest in it because the way you cook makes his mouth water. When he learns about what your favorite food is he wants to lean how to cook it. However he does this in secret because he wants to surprise you. Sure enough he's able to get the biggest smile out of you when he presents you with your favorite meal.
"I learned it secretly, all for you, babe. Well I am quite good with my hands and I enjoy working, that was just another excuse to learn. Of course I don't have an ulterior motive for it! But if I did... and if it was kissing... would you kiss me for doing a good job?"
Mel is actually an amazing cook and knows a ton of recipes. Including your favorites of course. Do you really think she'd invite you over and offer you nothing to eat?
It's been a long time since she had to cook for anyone but herself but she's not bad at it at all. She has high standards when it comes to good food specifically because she holds herself to high standards. It doesn't matter how simple or complicated the meal is. When she invites you over and offers to make you food you better believe you're eating good that night. Not strictly food either.
"Beloved, slow down a little, the food isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We have all night. Every time I make food I do so because I want to enjoy a good meal, and you should too. And please be careful, I don't want you to choke, on the food that is."
#arcane x reader#jinx x reader#vi x reader#caitlyn x reader#maddie x reader#ekko x reader#vander x reader#silco x reader#sevika x reder#viktor x reader#jayce x reader#mel x reader#arcane imagine#arcane headcanon#arcane fluff#arcane x you#league of legends x reader#league of legends imagine#league of legends headcanons#league of legends fluff#league of legends x you#arcane x female reader#league of legends x female reader#x female reader#arcane#league of legends
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reblogging comment review by @zyafics
ok i can't contain myself to write so i will be reading (sorry for all the tiktoks send over dms hahaha) ⬇️
He hated physical therapy, but what he hated more was sitting on the sidelines, watching his teammates on the ice while he was stuck on a cushioned table with resistance bands and an overenthusiastic sports medic, with hair pulled into a no-nonsense ponytail and a pair of blue scrubs that somehow still looked cute on you.
always obsessed with your descriptions and im grinning so hard knowing that's ME hehehe
It was kind of cute, the way you tried so hard to keep things strictly professional between the two of you.
NOT FOR LONG I READ THE WARNING
He liked the way you said his name—like you were in control, like you were the one calling the shots. It was refreshing.
my dom girlyyy
You weren’t the kind of girl to fall for a player, especially one with a reputation like Rafe’s. Besides, you were already with someone. Logan—the clean-cut, dependable defenseman from a rival school. You’d been together for over a year, and things were great.
SCREAMINGGGGGGGGGG (muffled behind a pillow)
He grinned, like a stupidly in love sick puppy, unbothered by the jab. “Maybe that’s why I like you so much.”
me rn: login who???
"Good guy?" he interrupted, raising an eyebrow. "I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone describe me like that."
im so giddily rn, their banter is TOP TIER
“Logan’s a lucky guy.”
OH I SPELT IT WRONG LOLLLLL
He hated Logan more than he hated the pain in his knee.
🤭 im like a schoolgirl rn
“Did he hurt you?” His voice was low, a dangerous edge to it that he usually kept hidden. “Because if he did, I swear to God—”
imma be so honest i thought WE were gonna be cheating but i guess HE'S cheating that scumbag
“He’s not worth you,” Rafe said softly, stepping closer, his anger replaced by something gentler, “You deserve better than that. Way better.”
I KNOW so give me that dick 😁
Rafe’s knee had healed remarkably well, and now the day had arrived: his first game back on the ice. As it drew near, a strange sense of anxiety creeped in. Your life had become so closely tied to Rafe’s recovery over the past few months that the thought of him no longer needing your help—or your company—left you with an unsettling emptiness.
i need him to SLAM into logan ohmygod
He skates straight at Logan, not bothering with any pretense. If Logan wants to play dirty, he is more than ready to play dirtier. Logan barely has time to react before Rafe drops his gloves, his intent crystal clear.
LET'S FUCKING GOOOO
You don’t let him finish. Instead, you grab the front of his jersey and pull him down to your level, crashing your lips against his with a force that takes him completely off guard.
ANGRY MAKEOUT SESSION LETS GOOO
You break away just long enough to breathe, your lips brushing against his as you whisper, “You’re such a fucking idiot.”
“Been waiting for over an hour to do that,” you breathe.
oh im horny
“Then do it again,” he murmurs, “Do whatever the hell you want to me.”
oh HE'S horny
Rafe lets out a low, almost guttural sound as you rock your hips against him, the pressure making him tighten his grip on you, holding you in place as he grounds himself against you. The sensation makes your breath hitch, a needy whimper escaping your lips that only spurs him on.
ok im at a cafe, reading this smut on my 14'' screen where everyone can surely see. let me pack up and go home and i'll be back to react.
“Fucking idiot,” you whisper again, your voice rough with desire as you nip at his bottom lip, pulling it between your teeth before soothing the bite with your tongue.
I'M BACK
Without another word, he pulls you toward the locker room, his grip firm and unyielding as he leads you through the maze of benches and lockers. Your heart races as he pushes open the door to the showers, the sound of the water echoing off the tile walls. The room is empty, the air thick with steam, and the second you step inside, he’s pouncing on you. Clothes are gone in the blink of an eye.
Oh. My. God. this is so fucking hot what the FUCK
Rafe nearly passes out from the sight. Watching himself disappear inside you has to be his favorite sight in the entire world.
it's me, but THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!!!!
"Cameron? You in here, man?" Rafe freezes, his body tense, his cock still buried deep inside you as he glances toward the door, his breath ragged.
IM GRINNING my favorite part of public sex smut is the fact they're almost caught hahahahaa
He chuckles softly, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he looked down at you with a mixture of affection and desire. "Yeah, but I’m your fucking idiot."
my baby my baby my babyyy
final thoughts—i'm obsessed with this. ur writing. you. ohmygod, as always, the first thing that comes to my head is your descriptions. when you were describing reader, the medical training, the equipment and the environment, i always feel so immersed by your vocabulary and imagery. next, the fucking BANTER, oh you got me clutching my chest, giggling in the middle of a cafe. thank god no one was looking over my screen. but truly, i love how lowkey smitten rafe is with reader. he's always in love with her before the story truly begins and i love how much softer this version of rafe is. don't get me wrong, he's possessive and a beast on the ice, but something about him is so baby girl. thank you, gigi, for doing my request justice, i swear i want more!!!!
looking like motivation - hockey!r.c (+18)
requested by my #1 @zya4lifers
warnings: meantions of cheating; SMUT.
Rafe’s day started the same way it had for the last two months: with a groan of pain that shot up from his knee and settled into his mood like a stubborn storm cloud.
He hated physical therapy, but what he hated more was sitting on the sidelines, watching his teammates on the ice while he was stuck on a cushioned table with resistance bands and an overenthusiastic sports medic, with hair pulled into a no-nonsense ponytail and a pair of blue scrubs that somehow still looked cute on you.
At least that was what he thought when he first met you.
But two weeks in, his hatred had morphed into something else entirely, something way more complicated. He wasn’t sure when it happened—maybe when he caught you singing quietly along with the radio while taping up his knee, or when you’d given him that first, honest-to-God smile that wasn’t out of politeness but genuine amusement at some stupid joke he’d made. And he made a lot of those.
Now, sitting on that same damn table, Rafe found himself looking forward to PT in a way that had nothing to do with his injury. You walked in, clipboard in hand, looking as professional as always. It was kind of cute, the way you tried so hard to keep things strictly professional between the two of you. Rafe knew he got under your skin—hell, he made sure of it. He could tell by the way your eyes flicked up to meet his for just a second longer than necessary before you quickly looked away. You tried to be cool, but he knew better.
“Alright, Cameron. How’s the knee today?”
He put on his best wounded-puppy face. “Terrible. I might never skate again.”
“Shut up.”
“And I could be better,” Rafe drawled, his lips curling into that signature smirk. “But seeing you always helps.”
You rolled your eyes, but he saw the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. “You say that every time.”
“And I mean it every time,” he shot back, winking at you.
You tried to ignore him, busying yourself with adjusting the equipment. “Let’s focus on your knee, alright?”
“Whatever you say, Doc,” Rafe said, stretching out on the table with a lazy grin.
You rolled your eyes, but the corners of your mouth twitched up. “We’ve got to work on your pain tolerance.”
He couldn’t resist. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to keep me on my toes.”
Finally, you looked up, your expression deadpan. “And if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to avoid actually doing your therapy, Cameron.”
Touché.
He liked the way you said his name—like you were in control, like you were the one calling the shots. It was refreshing.
The first few minutes of the session passed in relative silence as you guided him through the exercises, your hands expertly working his injured knee. Rafe winced, but it wasn’t all from the pain. It was from trying to resist the urge to say something that might actually cross the line. But resisting wasn’t really his style.
“So, what’s your boyfriend up to this weekend?” Rafe asked, his voice casual, but his eyes sharp, watching your reaction.
You weren’t the kind of girl to fall for a player, especially one with a reputation like Rafe’s. Besides, you were already with someone. Logan—the clean-cut, dependable defenseman from a rival school. You’d been together for over a year, and things were great.
You looked up at him, a little caught off guard. “Out of town.”
Rafe snorted, unable to help himself. “Figures.”
You frowned, straightening up to give him a look. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Rafe shrugged, feigning innocence. “Nothing.”
“He’s busy,” you said defensively.
“Too busy for you?” he pushed, his tone dripping with faux concern. “That’s a shame. If you were mine, I’d make time.”
You gave him an unimpressed look, “I’m sure you would.”
“You don’t think I would?”
“I think you’ve already got your hands full with the cheerleading team.”
He liked to pretend you sounded jealous and not critical.
Rafe chuckled, the sound low and rumbling in his chest. “Cheerleaders are fun and all, but they’re not really my type.”
Okay, that was half a lie, but in his defense, he hadn’t slept with anyone on the cheer squad since sophomore year.
You raised an eyebrow, feigning disinterest as you adjusted the strap on his knee brace. “And what exactly is your type, Cameron?”
He leaned in slightly, his voice dropping to a flirtatious whisper. “Complicated. Smart. Gorgeous.”
You didn’t miss a beat, even as your pulse quickened. “So, basically the opposite of you?”
He grinned, like a stupidly in love sick puppy, unbothered by the jab. “Maybe that’s why I like you so much.”
You shook your head, trying to hide the smile threatening to break through. “You’re relentless, you know that?”
“Only when it comes to you,” he replied smoothly, his eyes locked on yours.
There was no denying the chemistry, no matter how hard you tried to ignore it. But you were with someone else, someone who, despite his flaws, you cared about. Still, Rafe made it hard to remember why you were trying to resist in the first place.
“Rafe, we really should focus on your PT,” you said, trying to steer the conversation back to safer territory.
“Trust me, I am focusing,” he replied, his tone suggesting he wasn’t talking about his knee.
You rolled your eyes, standing up straighter to put some distance between you.
“Right. Well, you need to focus on this next exercise. We’re going to work on your range of motion.”
He sighed dramatically but didn’t argue, watching you with a lazy smile as you moved to demonstrate the exercise. He couldn’t help but admire the way you carried yourself—confident, knowledgeable, and completely fucking beautiful. It was a challenge, and Rafe Cameron loved a challenge.
As you guided his leg through the motion, your hands firm but gentle, Rafe couldn’t resist pushing a little more. “You know, you never answered my question.”
“What question?” you asked, though you had a feeling you knew where this was going.
“What you’re doing this weekend,” he said, his eyes locked on yours, the intensity of his gaze making your breath catch.
You glanced away, focusing on the movement of his knee, your fingers brushing against his skin as you adjusted the angle. “I’ll probably just catch up on some work. Maybe relax.”
“Sounds boring,” Rafe remarked, though there was a playful lilt to his voice. “You should let me take you out.”
You looked up sharply, caught off guard by his directness. “Rafe, I’m—”
“Taken, I know,” he interrupted, his tone still light but with an undercurrent of something more serious. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun, does it? Just as friends.”
“Just as friends?” you echoed skeptically, knowing full well what his idea of ‘just friends’ probably entailed.
Rafe shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips. “We could get dinner, maybe hit up a bar, talk about something other than my knee for once. It doesn’t have to be a big deal.”
“No.”
His smirk faltered, just for a second, before it came back stronger, more determined. He leaned back on the table, pretending to stretch as he tried to mask the sting of rejection. "No?" he echoed, as if the concept was foreign to him.
You crossed your arms, standing firm even though his eyes on you made your heart race. "No. We both know what you're trying to do, and it's not going to happen."
"And what exactly am I trying to do?" he asked, feigning innocence with a smirk that told you he knew exactly what he was doing.
You rolled your eyes, refusing to get drawn into his game. "You know what. I’m here to help you with your injury, not to entertain whatever fantasy you’ve got going on."
"Who says it’s a fantasy?" he shot back, his voice lowering, taking on a more serious tone that caught you off guard. "Maybe I just want to get to know you better."
You paused, searching his face for any sign of sincerity. But Rafe was hard to read when he wanted to be, his playful exterior a well-practiced mask that he rarely let slip. "Rafe, you're a good guy, but—"
"Good guy?" he interrupted, raising an eyebrow. "I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone describe me like that."
"Fine," you conceded with a small smile. "Maybe ‘good’ is a stretch. But you’re not as bad as you want people to think."
Rafe’s smirk faded. It was a rare moment of vulnerability, and it made you hesitate, made you wonder if there was more to him than just the cocky, relentless flirt.
But before you could dwell on it, he was back to his usual self, flashing you that devil-may-care grin that made it hard to stay mad at him. "You know, I’d actually take that as a compliment if it came from anyone else."
"Don’t get too excited," you replied, trying to keep things light. "I still think you’re a pain in the ass."
"Yeah, but I’m your pain in the ass," he teased, stupidly blinking his lashes up at you.
You shook your head, unable to stop the laugh that bubbled up. "You really don’t give up, do you?"
"Not when it comes to something I want," he said, his voice dropping an octave.
"Cameron, this isn’t going to happen. I have a boyfriend."
He shrugged, unbothered. "And? You’re no fun. You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?”
You handed him a water bottle, expression neutral. “You’re just out of shape.”
“Out of shape?” He looked at her, incredulous. “Do you see this body?”
You didn’t take the bait. “I see a guy who’s been slacking off on his conditioning.”
He laughed, low and warm, as he took a sip of water. “You’re tough. Tougher than most of the coaches I’ve had.”
You shrugged, as if it was no big deal. “Someone has to keep you in line.”
“Logan’s a lucky guy.”
The hockey world was small, and word got around, of course he knew his name.
“Logan’s great,” you said, a little too quickly.
Rafe nodded, his expression unreadable. “Yeah, I’m sure he is.”
He didn’t push it further, though. Instead, he fell back into his usual routine of teasing and flirting. Every time you guided his leg through a stretch or adjusted the equipment, he found his mind wandering, imagining what it would be like if things were different. If he were the one you were coming home to after a long day, if he were the one you smiled at without that guarded look in your eyes.
But you were with Logan, and as much as he hated to admit it, Rafe wasn’t the kind of guy to cross that line. Not when you were clearly trying so hard to keep things professional between the two of you.
As the session wrapped up, you handed him his schedule for the next few days, your demeanor as cool and composed as ever. “I’ll see you on Thursday. Make sure you keep up with the exercises over the next couple of days, and don’t overdo it.”
He took the paper from your hands, his fingers brushing against yours for the briefest of moments. It was enough to send a jolt of electricity through him.
“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be good,” he muttered, more to himself than to you.
“Try to stay out of trouble, okay?”
“Can’t make any promises.”
He spent the weekend bored out of his mind, thinking about you—wondering if you were with Logan, if the guy was actually smart enough to know what he had.
He hated Logan more than he hated the pain in his knee.
The guy was too perfect, too dependable, too fucking boring. And Rafe had been praying, in a way he wouldn’t admit to anyone, that something would happen—something that would make you see Logan for the jackass he really was. It wasn’t that he thought he was a better guy; he knew his own flaws better than anyone. But he also knew that he could make you happier, make you laugh harder, make you feel things that Logan never could.
So when you walked in late to the next session, he was ready to make a joke, to tease you about finally deciding to show up. But the words died on his lips when he saw you. You weren’t looking at him, not really, just muttering a half-hearted apology as you dropped your bag in the corner. But when you finally met his gaze, his chest tightened.
Your eyes were bloodshot red, the kind of red that came from hours of crying, from tears that wouldn’t stop no matter how hard you tried. You looked exhausted, like you hadn’t slept in days, and your usual spark was nowhere to be found.
His first instinct was to make a joke, to lighten the mood the way he always did, but he couldn’t. Not when you looked like that.
“Hey,” he said softly, his voice void of its usual cockiness. “You okay?”
You nodded, but it was the kind of nod that was meant to shut someone up, not because you actually meant it. You were far from okay.
“You’re late,” he said, his tone teasing, but even he could hear the concern underneath.
“I know, sorry,” you replied, your voice small, almost defeated.
Rafe frowned, his eyes narrowing as he studied you. This wasn’t like you. You were always so put together, so in control, and seeing you like this was…so unsettling.
“What happened?” he asked, more serious now, the joking tone completely gone.
You shook your head, avoiding his gaze as you busied yourself with the equipment, but Rafe wasn’t going to let it go that easily. Not when he could see the pain written all over your face.
“Come on, what’s going on?” he pressed, his voice soft but insistent. “Did something happen with Logan?”
The way you flinched at his name told him everything he needed to know. His chest tightened, protectiveness swelling inside him. He’d always thought Logan was too good to be true, but seeing you like this confirmed it.
“Did he hurt you?” His voice was low, a dangerous edge to it that he usually kept hidden. “Because if he did, I swear to God—”
“No,” you interrupted, your voice cracking slightly as you finally looked at him, “I mean, yes, but… it’s not like that.”
His jaw clenched, his hands curling into fists at his sides. “What did he do?”
You hesitated, the words catching in your throat as you tried to hold it together. But there was no point in pretending anymore, not when Rafe was looking at you like that—like he actually cared, like he was ready to go to war for you if that’s what it took.
“He cheated,” you finally whispered, your voice trembling as the tears you’d been holding back threatened to spill over. “I found out through a fucking DM on Instagram. Some girl… she just messaged me out of the blue and told me everything. And when I confronted him, he didn’t even deny it. He just—just said it wasn’t a big deal.”
Rafe’s vision blurred with red-hot anger. He wanted to find Logan and beat the shit out of him for making you cry, for being stupid enough to let you go. But more than that, he wanted to make you feel better, to make the hurt go away, even if he didn’t know how.
“That fucking asshole,” He growled, his voice trembling with barely controlled rage. “I swear to God, I’ll—let me get on that ice and I’ll wipe the entire ring with his face.”
“Rafe, don’t,” you said quickly, cutting him off. “It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it, okay?”
His heart twisted at the broken look in your eyes, the way your voice wavered as if you didn’t quite believe your own words.
“He’s not worth you,” Rafe said softly, stepping closer, his anger replaced by something gentler, “You deserve better than that. Way better.”
You looked up at him, surprised by the sincerity in his voice. It wasn’t like him to be so serious. But here he was, looking at you like you were the most important person in the world, and it made your heart ache even more.
“I don’t know what I deserve anymore,” you admitted, your voice small and lost.
He reached out, hesitating for just a second before he gently cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the tear that had finally escaped.
“You deserve someone who knows what they have when they have you,” he said, his voice steady, his eyes locked on yours. “Someone who would never make you cry like this. Someone who would never, ever cheat on you.”
You swallowed hard, feeling a fresh wave of tears threatening to spill over at his words. “Rafe…”
“I’m serious,” he continued, his voice dropping to a whisper. “You’re… you’re amazing, you know that? Any guy would be lucky to have you, and Logan’s a fucking idiot for not seeing that.”
You shook your head, trying to keep it together, but it was no use.
You started to cry, the kind of deep, gut-wrenching sobs that you’d been holding in all weekend. And before you knew it, you were collapsing into his arms, letting him hold you as you cried, his arms strong and steady around you.
He didn’t say anything, didn’t try to shush you or tell you everything was going to be okay. He just held you, his hand gently rubbing your back as you let it all out, crying into his chest until there were no more tears left.
When you finally pulled back, your face red and puffy from crying, you only uttered a small, “Thank you.”
Rafe nodded, his eyes soft as he looked down at you. “Anytime.”
And then, without thinking, you leaned up and pressed a soft, hesitant kiss to his cheek, lingering for just a second before pulling away. He blinked, a little stunned by the gesture, but before he could say anything, you stepped back, trying to regain some semblance of composure.
“Do you mind if we reschedule for tomorrow?” you said quickly, your voice still shaky. “I’m not sure I-“
“Of course not.”
You breathed out in relief, “Thank you again. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He wanted to tell you to stay, to tell you that it was okay to not be okay, that you didn’t have to face this alone. But he knew you needed space, needed time to process everything that had happened.
“Yeah,” he said softly, nodding as you turned to leave. “Tomorrow.”
He wanted to be there for you, to be the one you turned to when everything fell apart. But more than that, he wanted to be the one to put you back together again, to show you that not all guys were like Logan—that he wasn’t like Logan.
And as you disappeared down the hallway, he made a silent promise to himself: he was going to make you see that. No matter what it took.
⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷ೃ⁀➷⁀➷ೃ
The weeks passed, each session with Rafe seamlessly flowing into the next. What started as this totally professional thing, strictly business, slowly morphed into something way more personal. His cocky jokes and playful banter had shifted into these deep conversations that actually mattered, and somewhere along the way, you found myself getting closer to him than you ever expected.
Rafe’s knee had healed remarkably well, and now the day had arrived: his first game back on the ice. As it drew near, a strange sense of anxiety creeped in. Your life had become so closely tied to Rafe’s recovery over the past few months that the thought of him no longer needing your help—or your company—left you with an unsettling emptiness.
You had prepared yourself for the possibility that he might distance himself once he was back on the ice. After all, athletes had their own lives, their own routines, and you were just the therapist who had helped him get to this point. But when he invited you to his first game, the gesture came as a welcome. Whether you wanted to admit it or not, he’d slowly lurked his way into your heart.
It was after a particularly intense session, where you’d pushed him harder than ever before, that he brought it up. You were finishing up, wiping down the equipment while he caught his breath, stretching out his legs on the bench.
“You know,” Rafe started, his voice casual but with a hint of something more in it, “I’ve got my first game back tomorrow night.”
You looked up, catching the subtle edge in his tone. “Yeah, I’ve heard. You must be excited.”
“Excited? Nervous as hell, more like it.” He chuckled, running a hand through his hair, “It’s been a long time coming. A lot of pressure to perform, y’know?”
You nodded, understanding him. You’d seen how hard he’d worked, how much this comeback meant to him. “You’ll do great, Cameron. You’re more than ready.”
He smiled at that, but there was something else in his expression, something hesitant. “I was thinking…maybe you could come. To the game, I mean. It’d be nice to have someone there who’s seen the whole process, who knows what it took to get back on that ice.”
His words hung in the air, and you felt a warmth spread through your chest. It wasn’t just the invitation—it was what it represented. He didn’t just see you as the therapist who’d helped him heal. He saw you as someone important, someone he wanted by his side as he took this next step.
“I’d love to, Rafe. I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”
Relief washed over his face, followed by a grin that was equal parts gratitude and something else— “Good,” he said, his voice quieter now, “because I’d hate for you to miss it. You’ve been a big part of this, more than you know.”
Your heart fluttered at his words, and you found yourself blushing under his gaze.
“I’m just doing my job,” you replied, trying to keep your tone light, but the look in his eyes told you that he saw right through your attempt to downplay it.
“Yeah, well, I’m glad it’s you,” Rafe said, his voice earnest. “I don’t think I could’ve done this with anyone else.”
The sincerity in his voice, the way he looked at you as if you were the only person in the world at that moment, made it hard to breathe. This was more than just an invitation to a game. This was him telling you, in his own way, that you mattered to him—that you were more than just his therapist, that you were someone he wanted to keep around.
“I’m glad it was me too,” you whispered back, unable to tear your eyes away from his.
“Tomorrow night, then.”
“Tomorrow night.”
Now, as you sit in the stands, watching Rafe skate out onto the ice, you feel a nervous anticipation that has little to do with the game itself.
Just before the puck drops, Rafe catches your eye, giving you a confident wink that sends your heart racing. He knows what this game means, not just for him, but for you as well.
Logan is there, playing on the opposite team. You haven’t seen him in exactly two months. Whatever feelings you had for him disappeared the moment you found out about his betrayal, but your ego still hurts like hell.
The energy in the arena is electric, a buzz that makes his blood hum with anticipation. His first game back, and the stakes couldn’t be higher—not just because of his injury, not just because it’s a rivalry match, but because Logan is on the other side of the ice. Rafe’s jaw clenches at the thought of that bastard, the memory of your tear-streaked face still fresh in his mind.
During warm-ups, he spotted Logan, skating like he didn’t have a care in the world, like he hadn’t just thrown away the best thing that ever happened to him. Rafe’s grip tightens on his stick, his knuckles white against the black tape. The rage simmering beneath his skin isn’t just about the game. It’s personal.
His focus is razor-sharp, every movement precise, every play calculated. But no matter how much he tries to concentrate on the game, his eyes keep drifting back to Logan, who skates circles around the ice like he owns it.
The first period passes without incident, but by the second, the tension is boiling over. Rafe feels it building, that need to do something, to break Logan’s face in half. He doesn’t just want to beat him; he wants to humiliate him, to knock that smug look off his face once and for all.
Then it happens.
Midway through the second period, Logan makes a hard hit on one of Rafe’s teammates, sending the guy crashing into the boards. The hit is clean, but it’s the arrogance in Logan’s smirk that pushes Rafe over the edge.
He doesn’t hesitate.
He skates straight at Logan, not bothering with any pretense. If Logan wants to play dirty, he is more than ready to play dirtier. Logan barely has time to react before Rafe drops his gloves, his intent crystal clear.
“You think you can just get away with that?” He snarls, his voice low and menacing as he shoves Logan hard in the chest, the force sending him stumbling back on his skates.
Logan’s eyes flash with surprise, quickly followed by anger. “What the hell’s your problem, Cameron?”
He doesn’t bother with a reply.
He swings, his fist connecting solidly with Logan’s jaw. The satisfying crunch of bone against bone is drowned out by the roar of the crowd, but Rafe doesn’t care. He’s been waiting for this moment, waiting to unleash all the pent-up anger and frustration that’s been eating away at him since the day you walked into that PT room with your heart shattered.
Logan staggers back, his expression twisting with fury. He recovers quickly, launching himself at Rafe with a wild swing, but Rafe is ready. He dodges the punch and counters with another one of his own, this time aiming for Logan’s ribs. He can feel the impact reverberate up his arm, but it’s not enough. He wants more.
“Come on!” He shouts, face red from all the pent-up anger simmering inside him. “Is that all you’ve fucking got?”
Logan grits his teeth, struggling to keep his balance. “You’re fucking crazy, Cameron!”
“You haven't seen shit," He spits back, landing another punch to Logan’s midsection. “But at least I know how to treat someone right.”
Logan’s eyes widen, the realization of what this is really about dawning on him. “This is about her? You’re seriously going to throw down over some girl?”
Rafe’s vision goes red at the mention of you, the casual way Logan dismisses you as “some girl.” He doesn’t care that he’s going too far, doesn’t care that the refs are probably going to break this up any second. All he cares about is making Logan feel a fraction of the pain he caused you.
“You don’t get to talk about her,” He growls, grabbing Logan by the collar and yanking him close. “You don’t even get to think about her.”
Logan tries to shove him off, but Rafe is relentless, landing punch after punch, each one fueled by the memory of you crying in his arms, by the way your voice trembled when you told him what Logan had done.
By now, the refs are on them, trying to pull Rafe away, but he isn’t finished. Not yet.
“You don’t deserve her,” He hisses through clenched teeth, his fist connecting with Logan’s face one last time before the refs finally manage to separate them. “You never did.”
Logan stumbles back, his face a bloody mess, and for a brief moment, he feels a little satisfaction. But it isn’t enough to stop the anger, the frustration, the overwhelming need to protect you from ever being hurt like that again.
He sits in the penalty box, his chest heaving as he tries to calm the adrenaline still pumping through his veins. He can barely hear the crowd over the sound of his own heartbeat, but he knows they’re going wild. The fight has been brutal, and he’s given Logan exactly what he deserved. But as the rush of the fight starts to fade, he starts to overthink: how will you react?
The game ends with a hard-fought win for his team, but the victory feels hollow. As his teammates celebrate on the ice, Rafe’s thoughts are miles away, fixated on you. What if you’re pissed? What if you think he’s overstepped?
After the final whistle, he makes his way to the locker room, his mind racing. He’s about to strip off his gear when he hears footsteps approaching, quick and determined. Before he can even turn around, the locker room door flies open, and there you are, marching straight toward him with a look on your face that he can’t quite read.
Shit. You’re mad.
“Hey, listen,” he starts, his voice low and uncertain as he holds up his hands in a gesture of peace. “I know that might’ve looked bad out there, but I swear—”
You don’t let him finish. Instead, you grab the front of his jersey and pull him down to your level, crashing your lips against his with a force that takes him completely off guard.
His mind goes blank as all he can focus on is the way your mouth moves against his. It’s like nothing he’s ever felt before—raw, heated, desperate.
His hands instantly find your waist, gripping tightly as he pulls you flush against him, the heat of your bodies mingling in the small space between you. Your kiss is wild, all tongues and teeth, and when you bite down on his bottom lip, hard enough to make him groan, he realizes this is real.
You’re kissing him.
“Fuck,” he gasps against your mouth, his voice ragged with need. But you don’t give him a chance to catch his breath, your hands threading through his hair as you deepen the kiss, your lips moving with a feverish intensity that makes his head spin.
You break away just long enough to breathe, your lips brushing against his as you whisper, “You’re such a fucking idiot.”
The way you say it, half-growled, half-breathed, sends a shiver down his spine, and he can’t help the sound that escapes him, somewhere between a moan and a groan. His grip on your waist tightens, his fingers digging into your skin as he fights to keep control, but you aren’t making it easy.
You press yourself even closer, your body flush against his as you kiss him again, harder this time, more demanding. Your tongue sweeps into his mouth, claiming him, and Rafe is more than happy to let you take the lead. He’s never felt anything like this before—this urgency, this hunger that makes him want to lose himself in you completely.
You tug on his hair, tilting his head back to give yourself better access, and Rafe nearly loses it right then and there. He can feel his self-control slipping, can feel the primal need to devour you taking over, but he doesn’t care. All he can think about is how badly he wants you, how desperately he needs to feel more of you.
When you pull back, your lips are swollen and glistening, your breathing just as ragged as his. You stare at him, your eyes dark with lust, and Rafe feels his heart hammering in his chest, each beat echoing with the desire pulsing through him.
“Been waiting for over an hour to do that,” you breathe.
Rafe’s hands roam up your back, tracing the curve of your spine as he leans in, brushing his lips against your ear. When he reaches the curve of your ass, he doesn’t stop. His fingers grip you there, kneading the soft flesh with a pressure that makes you gasp into his mouth, your hips instinctively pressing against his.
“Then do it again,” he murmurs, “Do whatever the hell you want to me.”
His hands are everywhere, sliding up your sides, his thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts before moving back down to cup your ass again, pulling you even closer against him. You can feel him, hard and ready, pressing against your thigh, and it sends a wave of heat pooling low in your belly. You want him—more than you ever wanted anyone—and the way he’s looking at you tells you he feels the same.
Rafe lets out a low, almost guttural sound as you rock your hips against him, the pressure making him tighten his grip on you, holding you in place as he grounds himself against you. The sensation makes your breath hitch, a needy whimper escaping your lips that only spurs him on.
“Fucking idiot,” you whisper again, your voice rough with desire as you nip at his bottom lip, pulling it between your teeth before soothing the bite with your tongue.
His reaction is immediate. He groans, a sound so deep and full of need that it sends a shiver down your spine. His hands flex against you, his fingers digging into your flesh as if he’s trying not to loseg control completely.
But you can feel it—the way he’s trembling, the way his breath is coming in harsh, uneven pants against your neck. He kisses you again, hard and desperate, his mouth moving against yours with a fervor that matches the wild pounding of your heart
But just when you think you can’t take it any longer, the sound of footsteps echoes outside the door, snapping you both back to reality. You pull back, your chest heaving as you try to catch your breath, your mind spinning with the intensity of what had just happened. He’s just staring at you, his eyes glazed with desire, his lips swollen and red from your kisses. He looks as wrecked as you feel, and it takes everything in you not to drag him back down for more.
But you know you shouldn’t. Not here. Not now.
Except there’s no fucking way Rafe is letting you go now. He doesn’t say a word. His eyes lock onto yours, dark and filled with a raw need that makes your breath catch.
He doesn’t ask; doesn’t need to. He’s done waiting, done pretending he can hold back.
Without another word, he pulls you toward the locker room, his grip firm and unyielding as he leads you through the maze of benches and lockers. Your heart races as he pushes open the door to the showers, the sound of the water echoing off the tile walls. The room is empty, the air thick with steam, and the second you step inside, he’s pouncing on you. Clothes are gone in the blink of an eye.
He presses you up against the cold tile wall, his body flushes against yours as his lips find yours again, hands running over your wet skin. His mouth moves from your lips to your neck, his tongue tracing a path down to your collarbone as he kisses, licks, and nips at your sensitive skin. You whimper, fingers threading through his hair as he drops to his knees in front of you, his lips trailing down your stomach.
The sensation was overwhelming, the combination of the hot water and his hot mouth on your skin driving you insane. "If you don’t-" your voice trembles with need as he spreads your thighs apart, “Fuck.”
He looks up at you, “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
His hands grip your hips firmly. Without another word, he buries his face between your legs, his tongue flicking out to taste you. The sudden, intense pleasure makes you cry out, your hands clutching at his broad shoulders as he licks and sucks, his tongue working you over with a skill that leaves you gasping for breath. It’s not fair.
This man can’t possibly be real. The water splashes against your back, masking the sounds of your moans as he takes his time, driving you closer and closer to the edge with every swirl of his tongue. Your body trembles, your legs barely able to hold you up as he pushes you higher, his hands tightening on your hips as he holds you in place.
"Oh my god," you moan, your voice breaking as you feel the pleasure building to an unbearable peak. He doesn’t stop, doesn’t let up until you are crying out his name, your body shuddering as your orgasm crashes over you, your nails digging into his shoulders as the pleasure rips through you.
Rafe keeps his mouth on you, drawing out your release until you are trembling, your legs shaking as you struggle to catch your breath.
Truth is, he doesn’t want to stop. He can’t get enough now that he has finally gotten a taste. He stands back up, his hands running up your sides as he kisses you again, the taste of you still on his lips. You can feel him, hard and ready against your stomach, and it only drives you crazier. Of course, this man had to be fucking huge.
Without breaking the kiss, he spins you around, pressing you against the wall as his hands grip your hips, pulling them back slightly. You brace yourself against the tile, your body arching as you felt the head of his cock pressing against your entrance.
"Oh Rafe," you groan out his name, your voice low and needy and he growls softly in response, his breath hot against your ear as he slowly pushes inside you, filling you inch by inch until he is buried to the hilt.
Rafe nearly passes out from the sight. Watching himself disappear inside you has to be his favorite sight in the entire world.
“So fucking pretty.” The feeling of him stretching you, filling you completely, is almost too much to bear, and you let out a long, low moan as he begins to move, setting a slow, deliberate pace that drives you wild. The water cascades over your bodies as he thrusts into you, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he fucks you with a steady, unrelenting rhythm.
Each thrust pushes you harder against the wall, the cool tile a pleasing contrast to the heat between you. You can barely think, barely breathe, lost in the sensation of Rafe moving inside you, his cock hitting all the right spots with every thrust. The sound of the water mixed with the wet slap of skin against skin, your moans and gasps echoing off the walls as the pleasure built higher and higher, threatening to consume you.
"God, you feel so fucking good," He groans, his voice rough with desire as he leans over you, his lips brushing against your ear.
"Faster," you gasp, your voice pleading as you push back against him, needing more, needing everything. He doesn’t hesitate. His pace quickening, his thrusts coming harder and faster as he drives you both toward the edge. The intensity of it is overwhelming, every nerve in your body on fire as he fucks you with a raw, desperate need that matches your own. Just when you think you couldn’t take any more, you heard footsteps outside the shower, followed by a voice calling out.
"Cameron? You in here, man?" Rafe freezes, his body tense, his cock still buried deep inside you as he glances toward the door, his breath ragged.
"Yeah, I’m here," he calls back, trying to keep his voice steady, though you could hear the strain in it.
"We’re heading downtown to the bar. You coming?"
He looks down at you, all too pleased with himself, "Not tonight," he replies, his voice thick with lust. "Got something else to take care of."
There’s a pause, then a chuckle from the other side of the door. "Alright, man. Have fun."
The footsteps retreat, and the moment the door closes, he’s moving again, thrusting into you with a renewed urgency, the near-interruption only heightening the intensity of the moment. You moan loudly, your body quaking as he drives into you with a relentless rhythm, each thrust sending you spiraling closer and closer to another orgasm.
The combination of the heat, the steam, the feel of Rafe fucking you so hard is too much, the almost getting caught. You feel yourself losing it, your entire body tightening as you reach the edge once again.
"Come for me," He growls, his hands gripping your hips so tightly you are sure there will be bruises tomorrow. His words push you over, and you cry out as your orgasm tears through you, your body convulsing around him as the pleasure crashes over you in waves.
Rafe follows right behind you, his hips slamming into yours one last time as he comes, his body shuddering as he fills you to the brim with a low, guttural groan.
For a long moment, neither of you move, both of you panting, your bodies still trembling from the intensity of it all. The water continues to pour over you, washing away the evidence of your encounter as you slowly come down from the high.
Finally, he pulls out, turning you around to face him as he cups your face in his hands, his lips brushing softly against yours in a tender kiss that’s so different to the rough, desperate way he just fucked you.
"You’re a fucking idiot," you whisper against his lips, a small, breathless laugh escaping you.
He chuckles softly, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he looked down at you with a mixture of affection and desire. "Yeah, but I’m your fucking idiot."
He was fighting every fucking player on that ice ring if it meant having you again.
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Can you please make a muzan oneshot, smut with aftercare and muzan being alittle protective of m! Reader...
Thank you! <3
With pleasure I'll make this request! Take care💪🏼✨️👀
Also, I apologize for any errors in the text. I hope you will enjoy it.
_______________________________________
It was a day like any other, everyone looked the same. You, as a rank 0 higher moon demon, AND as the husband of the demon king, had a wide reputation among demons and humans alike. However, Muzan Kibutsuji didn't treat your strength like the others, he loved you too much to care if you were powerful enough. For him, you were and are his property, which he must protect against possible threats. Mainly rivals created by your handsome appearance. But who would dare to endanger the MUZAN himself? Probably just a real suicide.
Y/N was currently walking through the forest after mercilessly killing a man from the village he was passing by. As an Upper Moon demon, he must eat quite regularly in order for his strength to remain the same or even greater. Even if he sometimes has some signs of humanity in his heart, he still doesn't care much about this feeling. He had long since rid himself of the feeling of guilt in his soul, all in order to be able to kill more effectively and faster. He is about 600 years old, has adapted to living in the body of a creature and killing those who resist his actions. Y/N remembers almost nothing from his past, except for the feeling of weakness... his heart only remembers how he felt then, not what he was like and what his life was like, did he have a family? Did he have a wife and children? Was he someone important? Nothing. Emptiness.
While listening to the sounds of nature, he heard another sound, but of feet pattering behind him and then next to him. It was as if this person was fast enough to somehow teleport. Y/N looked at them, his c/e eyes meeting rainbow ones. It was none other than Doma, who no one likes because... he's the least bit annoying.
— Hello, Lord Y/N~! How is our handsome boy? — he asked with a practiced and false tone of joy, something that was probably the reason why no one liked him. Y/N remained unfazed by his presence, but he felt a certain irritation. Doma moved in on him far too many times, as if he wanted more than a punch to the jaw.
— How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that? Don't you have anything else to do? — he replied with a great show of dislike towards the demon next to him, looking at him out of the corner of his eye with his deadly gaze, which usually made every demon and human bend more than one knee. But not Doma, this type has too much of a disregard for other people's needs.
— Aww~ Ice cold as always, huh? I'm just trying to be nice to Muzan's lover~.... — he said. And his voice and facial expression were like a child who didn't get what he wanted.
—You'll be nice when you get out of here.— Y/N finally looking at the shorter man with his full perspective. However, instead of an answer, he received a kiss, which shocked him. He automatically pushed him away and punched him in the jaw hard enough to tear off half his face, staining his hands with blood. Doma looked at him with a strange look, maybe if his face was intact it would look better... The man smiled slyly as if he was proud of what he had done, lightly touching his newly regenerated jaw.
Muzan won't be happy with the fact that his "property" has been touched and Y/N knows it, which is why he felt a slight twinge in his stomach from the stress. Because he'll get hurt too.
—Who the fuck are you? — a deep and loud voice asked, while the sounds of limbs and bones being torn to shreds echoed throughout the room. The muzzled hand was tearing apart Doma's body, and Doma was not reacting much to any of these harms. The brunette's blood-red eyes scanned the demon in front of him, who was kneeling.
—How dare you disregard my order? How dare you TOUCH something that belongs to me? — he grabbed the blonde by the forehead, his claw drilling a hole in the skull. He then caused his cells to slowly melt Doma's body.
Upper Rank 2 began bleeding from the inside, choking on a red substance. Pulsating, almost purple veins appeared on his skin.
—I should kill you....But you are a useful demon because of your loyalty. However, one more move like that... and I will personally expose you to the sun.— Muzan threatened, letting his brother go free.
—Muzan....I'm sorry, honey. I had no way to react to protect myself from Doma's kiss... I didn't expect it. - you whispered, your voice sounding completely different because of the way the veins that carry Muzan's blood tightened around your weave. You were in a kneeling position in front of your husband, who was sitting on a chair, his chin resting on his hand and his eyes down on your apologetic form. He had you like this for a while now, letting his anger out on you.
—.....— Muzan closed his eyes and then stopped controlling his cells, letting you breathe. His gaze moved to the side, ignoring you. You could see from a mile away that he was still pissed at you.
The moment you gained access to breathing again, you gasped. Coughing heavily from the dryness in my throat and the lack of oxygen. But you didn't have time to feel sorry for yourself, you had to console Muzan somehow, before he will kill useful demons.
You stepped closer to Muzan, resting your head on his knee.
—I love you, you know?— you said, knowing that this sentence would calm Muzan down instantly. The man finally looked at you, his gaze still as cold as ice. But his eyes became less wild, clear evidence that he had calmed down. His hand gently grabbed your chin, stroking it lightly with his thumb.
— I know. I love you too, you're like a toxin that makes me sick. But it is also very....addictive.— Muzan pulls your body up by your hand, he also stood up. Making you both switch positions, where this time you are sitting and he is kneeling.
— However, I want you to make me realize this by fucking me.— he said with a smirk. His tone was seductive and his eyes were filled with lust and horniness. Your member twitch at that sight, you couldn't resist your husband's "request", when it was clearly what you desired too deep down. Before you answered, Muzan already was working your pants off, he rip them off to be honest. Exposing your big and hard length that he loves so much, his tongue licks his lower lip, getting ready to the delicious taste he will have on it by a few seconds.
He opens his lips wide, already trying to deepthroat your dick with his tight canal. Making you hiss from pleasure and tighten your grip on the chair, claws digging into the wooden furniture. Your King sucks every good spots, pulling away for a while to spit on your cock to make it more wet. His tongue lick your tip, kissing it passionately as if making out with it, before going back down to your shaft. Licking up and down, massaging your balls and squeezing them from time to time. Making your head be on cloud 9 and resisting the urge to fuck your husband's throat. He wets your cock so good that it made such a sloppy sounds that made Muzan's mind go crazy, he only wants you to rile him like the last whore and then shower with affection. That's why he grabbed roughly your wrist and put it on his head, signaling you to control his movements.
You didn't waste any time in making him choke and gag all over your large cock, you could feel his nails pressing into your skin on thighs from pleasure and the feeling of your rough treatment. The feeling of a colossal hand gripping his hair, that clearly belong to you made his own dick almost cream his pants from excitement. And when you finally came in his mouth, he swallowed it eagerly like a treasure. His lips all red and swollen from sucking and having his mouth filled with something so thick.
— Take my clothes off. Now.— he damanded, but his voice sounds so needy and almost desperate. While he tried to mask it by cleaning your dick off from the rest of cum. You pull him on your lap with one move of your arm, making him gasp a bit. Before you took off his whole clothes, your gaze fixed on his expression that showed a pure lust. Muzan's mouth instinctively wrap itself around your fingers, wetting them as if he knows by the look on your face what you want him to do.
— Good slut.— you said with a smirk and satisfaction, even if your husband doesn't seem to like this nickname. (He feels butterflies in his stomach but his mind refuse to accept it)
— I am NOT a slut.— he said with serious tone, sounding a bit stern.
— Then I'll have to prove you wrong. Cause sluts like you can take cocks like mine without preparation.— You said, making Muzan look at you in confusion and he understood in a second what you meant.
— Oi, no!— he tried to protest in panic, his eyes widen, a loud scream from pleasure and pain left his mouth as you slam your cock inside him with one, smooth move. You groan at the tightness around your cock, it almost felt like it's sucking you inside.
— Don't cry, honey... I know you like it. Good slut-husbands like you are experts in satisfing your beloved.— you whisper in his ear, wiping his tears off from his cheeks. You looked at his expression that was a mix of pleasure and pain, his teeth clenched from the feeling of you deep inside him, touching his prostate with the tip of your cock.
Muzan was quiet for a few seconds, before he chuckles from esctasy and his red eyes fixed on you. He tighten his gummy like walls around your member to tease you and motivate you into fucking him.
— Of course.....I'll take care of your crotch like a good husband slut.— Muzan's lips kissed your face, starting with you forehead and ending at your lips. He really do love you for agreeing for you to call him this way....
Next thing he knows was you making him bounce like a desperate bunny on your dick, making sloppy sounds from going in and out of his entrance. The sounds of his loud moaning, mewling and your grunts and groans spread all over his office. Muzan's hair were messy and wet from sweat. His eyes unfocused. His sharp nails digging intl your shoulders. His legs shaking. His walls clenched and unclenched from pleasure and overstimulation. You hit his prostate over and over again, making him wanna cry to heavens.... or to hell.
Suddenly, you stand up with him in your arms, surprising him a bit as he got placed on his desk with legs spread. His back met the surface of the wooden furniture, he pants like a dog as he watched you put his legs on your shoulders, making your balls made a contact with his ass. He whimpers from that feeling.
— Fuck me.....Fuck your slutty husband.....fill me with your hiers and have the satisfaction of owning the King of demons~— Muzan said with a smirk, chest going up and down from breathing hard. That words went straight to your cock, twitching inside your lover. Your gaze like a predator, as you move oncr again. Hips snapping back and forth hard and deep, as if you were seriously trying to make him pregnant or break. He grip onto the edges of his desk, almost destroying it with his demonic strength. The pre-cum made it easier for you to go in and out of his warm and wet ass. His entrance sucked you greedy in, as if not planning for you to leave it.
— Such a good slut for me, huh? Your tiny hole seems not to want me to let go.— you said between moans, rubbing his pale waist in your hands.
— Uh-huh.....Haah...haaah...haaah...Not let go....haah...HAAH....HAAHH...— he said dumbly, without thinking twice before saying it. Feeling stupid from esctasy.
Hours passed, it was already morning and you two only just done having sex. You slip your cock out of his hole, making the cum drip from Muzan's ass. You looked at your dear husband that you spent your whole life as a demon. Admiring his appearance that looked so messy. It's kinda sad that the marks you left regenerate faster than you blink...But you still felt satisfaction, because you owned THE Muzan Kibutsuji.
— Very well, Y/N......you kept me satisfy.— Kibutsuji said, his voice breathless but his gaze intense. He pulls you towards him with strong grip, making you lay on top of his body. Rubbing your back and head with his hand.
— But you have to make me a bath with rose petals.— he demand, looking down at you with a smile. You snuggle against his chest, squeezing his nipples between your fingers. Making him glare at you.
— Control yourself. I want bath.—
— Hehehe....— you laughed nervously.
#male reader#anime#gay#oneshot#request#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#muzan kibutsuji#kny muzan#rough kink#no prep#breeding k1nk#dom male reader#top male reader
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Okay blurb req for old money!Aemond who is ALSO a model for really expensive brands and his gf is a photographer👀 inspired by the photoshoot and that one specific blue leopard print pic🙂↕️🤭
oh my god i hope i did well, thank you, rue !! <33333
modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader
cw; modern!aemond being a hopeless romantic, suggestive, kisses, no but he's really so in love it hurts, photographer!reader and model!aemond can be a new favorite wow
"are you sure this is professional?"
aemond has no shame, honestly. you don't think you can be expected to be 'professional' when your boyfriend looks like he'll ruin your entire existence by looking like the most charming being in the entire universe.
his blue eyes sparkle in the latest photos you take, a stark contrast with his platinum blonde hair. flowy strands make you want to pull aemond to yourself enough to give him a good kiss on his neck as your fingers travel in his hair. maybe you can do that when you get to be alone with him. oh, you'll definitely do that when you're alone.
"i believe i'm extremely professional." you murmur, holding his hand to make him pose the way you want. "if you stop being so distracting, it'll be even better."
he smirks. a small quirk of lovely lips, he's handsome and he knows it. he leans into your space and your hold on your camera tightens. you will not kiss him. you can't, there are other people here, and this is business. you take a step back.
"i'm only doing what you tell me to do." he says like he's the most innocent man. "you can't say i'm not being good."
you give him a small smile. he's in the mood for playing.
"i didn't say that." you say, quietly. "come on, a few more for me and we'll be done."
aemond fixes his posture, your one hand still holding his. "of course." he says, coolly. "you know i can actually be good for you. as many as you want, you'll have it."
you lick your lips to control your face expressions. not the time, not the place. just like you say to him, only a few more and you'll be done.
the clothes he's wearing make aemond look taller as if it's actually possible. you admire his poses, his confidence and his awareness of how good he looks. he turns his head for another picture, his eyes following your every move. it's like a wordless conversation between you two.
"can i get one with a smile?" you ask him, your hand directing his last pose. "not too wide, just- a subtle one, please."
"i'm afraid that's not possible if i'm going to give you a smile." he flirts. "maybe you should let someone else take the photo if you need a subtle one."
you hear two girls giggling at the corner. he really thinks he's so fun, doesn't he? it's his world here, he knows how to charm his way and he certainly knows how to be a flirt. you're thankful he's already yours, it would be impossible to handle him otherwise.
after another fifteen minutes, you're all done. you go next to aemond, leaving your camera. people around you move quickly to clean up the place, and fix all the mess that has been made. aemond takes your hand to brush a kiss on your knuckles. his eyes are warm this time, so clear under this lights.
"what do you think?" he asks. "good?"
you nod softly. "probably the best in a long time."
"kind of hard not to." he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer. "i had the best photographer."
you give him a kiss on his cheek but that's all. he's been teasing you all day long. "do you flirt with all your photographers like this, mr. targaryen?"
"absolutely not." he answers, cheekily. "my flirting skills are reserved for only one person."
"i think you owe me a drink." you tell him. "even working is easier than trying to deal with your incessant teasing."
"we'll have dinner first." he says, kissing the side of your head. he doesn't say, but he's tired. "think of what you want to eat when i'm changing, okay? i have a few options if you can't decide."
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen x reader#house of the dragon#modern!aemond#aemond x you#aemond x reader#hotd#aemond targaryen x fem!reader#aemond targaryen x you#aemond targaryen fic#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond one eye#aemond targaryen imagine#modern!aemond targaryen x reader#modern!aemond targaryen#modern!aemond x you#house targaryen#house of the dragon fic#aemond x fem!reader#modern!aemond targaryen x you
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sweetest lies | c.s (final)
prev // series m.list
pairing: choi san x f!reader
word count: 13k
warning: smut that i'm not proud of
a/n: it's finally here! only took like 10 years. apology if i missed anyone on the taglist, it's been forever
you know you're probably wrong. but even if you are, you don't wanna hear about it.
don't wanna hear about all the mistakes and choices you're making on a whim because you've already had enough of today.
you wish you were surprised when san is the first thing you see upon exiting your work building. at this point, it's really just irritating how predictable he is.
he showed up, of course he did. all the purposely missed calls and ignored texts practically an invitation--a mistake on your part.
hands in his pockets and a sullen expression on his face as if you've done him wrong, the beating of your heart louder the closer you are to him, whether you'd like to admit it or not.
he looks tired, even if it's evening and the sun is already faltering from the sky; adorned in his messy unbrushed hair and sweatsuit staring at you with eyes a mix of everything from annoyance, sadness, to anger--all of which you don't wanna deal with right now, if ever.
you suck in your breath and stop in front of him, thinking it's way too cliche if you just walk past him only to be pulled back by the grip on your wrist. so you let him talk.
though it feels like the longest stare-off before he speaks up, after finally picking up the hint that if he isn't gonna, you two might as well stand in unpleasant silence.
"what happened?" is all san says, because he honestly can't even begin to think of what to ask first.
why did you ignore all of his calls and texts yesterday? why are you standing before him now, looking the most pissed off he's seen you in a while when you also just sounded the happiest you've ever been in a while?
but most importantly, how did you all of sudden come to make up your mind so fast about the move? he swears, he was so sure just a day ago you were gonna stay. everything from your actions to body language, even if there were hiccups.
even if there were doubts in the smallest things you did or said at times that had him questioning the possibility for a second... he was still willing to bet you'd eventually end up staying.
"nothing happened. i made up my mind. that's it," you tell him, refusing to meet his eyes while doing so, because if you did, it's almost like you knew he's gonna be able to see through the lies.
either way, he sees through it. some of it, at least. standing unmoved in his spot and trying to make sense of everything.
"i just don't understand," he says defeatedly, probably one of the most vulnerable he's ever sounded. "i was really sure you were gonna stay."
and you'd lie if the way he said it doesn't make your heart pinch with guilt a little, inhaling another deep breath and hurling out words deprived of any empathy, "well you thought wrong."
you can tell he's taken aback by your response; the cold shoulder something he can take, but not when it's also met with harsh words he feels he's undeserving of.
"so that's it?" he says, shrugging with thinning patience and a tone no longer friendly and concerned. "you're just gonna leave?"
after everything. after he's tried so hard to change your mind, and after he was so sure he did.
"i guess so..." you mumble, looking to the ground, ashamed but also too prideful to back down now.
an almost never-ending silence sits between you and san until both of your heads shoot to the opening of the door to your workplace, one of your coworkers making a quick appearance before heading to their car.
san clears his throat.
"can i ask why, at least?"
the question brings an even bigger knot to your throat, because how do you even tell him the real reason at this point and not wanna run away after; losing all of your pride and dignity in front of the very boy you spent most of your life despising.
the same boy, who, you realized maybe you didn't hate so much and that you might even hold some more complex feelings for.
"because," you say, trying your best to sound convincing through all the lies you're about to spew, "i-i just think it's for the best."
it's then that san seems no longer angry or in disbelief, his face turning a softer expression that speaks as if he's come to an understanding, really taking your words for it.
"i see..." he says under his breath, staring down at the ground before looking you in the eyes one last time. "if you're sure that's what you really want, then i hope it works out."
your chest constricts just at the scene replaying in your head again; the defeated look on san's face and the eerie, guilt-stricken sensation you felt in the moment all coming back the same as before.
you down another sip of the drink in your hand, repeating the action every time the thought comes back, losing count on both the number of drinks you're on and the time.
occasionally, the irritating music from the shoddy bar does a good job of distracting you when the drinks isn't enough to overpower the mere thought that you're about to make one of the biggest mistakes of your life.
the bar is nearly empty, like if there weren't music playing, you'd be able to hear a pin drop. but you're thankful for the lack of pestering from guys twice your age due to it, given you're in no mood for confrontations.
it's only peaceful for a moment longer when the front door comes bursting and in arrives what seems like a rather large group of people, the chitters drawing yours and everyone else's attentions.
you groan irritatingly and finish the rest of your drink, considering this as the sign to go home for the night as you ring up the bartender for payment.
grabbing your purse and getting off the stool, you don't make it far past the group of newcomers before a familiar voice calls to you.
"y/n?" you hear him through the now hushed music, turning to your side and meeting his wide but calm eyes.
"hongjoong?" you squeak, swallowing the knot.
it takes him only one glance over to conclude you're a mess, and especially in a place he knows you go to in order to relieve whatever stress and misery you're going through.
"what brings you here?" he asks calmly.
"i should be asking you that," you return, gaze scanning the surrounding and people that has turned such a snoozefest place into a rowdy one.
"had a small but successful showing with the band i'm in, so we wanted to celebrate and invited a couple of our close friends," he answers, much to a silence from you, prompting him to ask, "and you?"
"i wanted to grab a drink," you say, trying your best to sound casual but it's like he saw the buffering in your head when you tried coming up with an excuse.
he raises a brow, his response takes you aback. "you wanna talk about it?"
if you had heard such a thing a couple months ago, you would've scoffed and told him to leave you the hell alone. but currently, you're aware you don't have a lot of choices.
it's either you get some company, or rot in your room for the rest of the night. and maybe hongjoong's in a certainly good mood from the previous event that he's willing to hear you out, because despite the unresolved differences between the two of you, he has always been a good listener.
someone you used to come to all the time when you had problems.
after you say yes (with some hesitation and shame), hongjoong excuses himself, making sure to let some of the people he came with know regarding his whereabouts for the next few minutes.
you both occupy a booth in the far corner overlooking the crowd. hongjoong gets water for you and him because he said he doesn't wanna get buzzed just yet, and that you've had enough for the night.
"been a while, hasn't it?" he speaks, the sight of you across from him in some sketchy bar making him nostalgic.
you both used to do it all the time together; frequenting bars and getting drunk off your asses, seonghwa would have to come pick you guys up.
it's been about three years since the last time.
"yeah," you reply, voice low, because the realization hits you that it has been that long.
it doesn't only make you as nostalgic as him, but also downright depressed because while hongjoong has grown within these past years, truly following his passion and making newer, better friends, you're still in the exact same position you were from before. heck, it's even worse now.
"what's with the long face?" he breaks you out of the thought. "rough day?"
you sigh, mumbling, "pretty much." though you wouldn't even have to answer for him to know. he just does, able to read you like an open book.
he nods understandably and lingers on words he's been wanting to say, eventually giving in.
"hey, look, about yunho's celebration party... i'm sorry if i was a dick."
“fancy seeing you here,” a voice from behind makes you snap around, finding hongjoong with a cup in his hand and something amusing in his eyes.
“thought you got too good for this kind of setting.”
the roll of your eyes is apparent, and you don’t bother to hide it.
“i’m not here to get high or whatever, i’m here for yunho.”
“of course you are,” he snides, the tone and attitude all the evidence that you’re just wasting time talking to him, and that even after all these years, hongjoong still holds a little grudge for you.
"i was just... angry and upset at the sudden sight of you after having not seen you for a while and it all came out without much thoughts."
you shake your head, unfazed from the reminder of your encounter with hongjoong at the celebration party.
"no. i understand. not like i was any nicer that day anyway."
another silence ensues, but you know it's because there's so much to say, hongjoong might not know where you begin. you don't even know where to begin.
"i ran into seonghwa a while ago," you start again, following with a chuckle when you add, "i don't know what it is that i keep running into you two."
hongjoong chuckles along.
"maybe faith wants us back together, i don't know," he jokes, but your laughter fades slowly, turning into something of a light smile.
"i do miss being with you guys," you say, locking eyes with him that speaks more than words can.
not just the parties and crazy memories, but the smaller, meaningful moments--listening to the new track hongjoong just produced as you try not to doze off, being forced to help seonghwa build the lego set he just got, and even just doing homeworks and assignments together although you were failing most of your classes.
it was them who tried to get you back on your feet, and them who tried to uplift you when you were at your lowest.
thinking of it, they might've been there for you more than yunho ever has, because after starting college, almost every instances where you were crying or is a mess, either hongjoong or seonghwa, or both, were by your side.
"i miss it, too," hongjoong says. "we're still great friends, of course, but it's not quite the same without you."
because while you had your shortcomings (most of them related to yunho), you were a great friend nonetheless.
you shared the same sense of humor and you just get him, even in ways seonghwa couldn't; the two of you able to go on for hours just debating and talking about stupid shit.
you were also quite tough in your own ways and never allowed anyone to look down on your friends--not seonghwa's nerdy hobbies, nor hongjoong's occasional shitty tracks.
you can't help the wider smile that breaks out from his comment. hongjoong don't know how much you needed to hear just one thing positive tonight, or maybe he does.
"i'm glad you still ache for my presence," you say lightheartedly, bringing out a chuckle from hongjoong.
"don't flatter yourself."
you laugh the comment off, taking a light sip of water and darting your eyes across the room to the group that came with hongjoong.
"looks like you've been doing well for yourself."
hongjoong nods. "i'd say i'm not doing so bad. and you? what have you been up to?"
it's then that the smile on your face falls, hongjoong taking a notice to it right away.
"you look down tonight, and considering you're here, i can only assume you haven't been having the greatest of time. you know you can always tell me anything, but if you're not ready, i also understand," he says carefully and empathetically, the way he always would when he sensed you were upset.
you take a deep breath because though you haven't properly spoken to him in years, you know hongjoong to be the type to carry a secret to his grave.
"it's just..." you begin, "everything's going to shit lately." obviously.
hongjoong doesn't say anything and lets you carry on respectfully, knowing he's unleashed just about everything you've kept to yourself that's been dying to get out.
"you and seonghwa were right. maybe yunho does love me, but he wasn't in love with me. him and minjeong are together now, and i caught them the night of his celebration party. my parents and his are already talking about an engagement dinner and i don't fucking know," you ramble, watching hongjoong's eyes widen at the revelation.
"woah," is all he can say.
"yeah, i know it's a lot to take in and i'm just starting."
"not to be that person that's a know-it-all, but i kind of felt something was going on between them, too. like there was always a weird ass vibe whenever they were together."
"wow," you say, puzzled. "i guess it must've just been me who was a dumbass and didn't see the signs."
"to be fair, you were pretty full of yourself so it doesn't come as a surprise," he takes a jab, knowing you won't take it to the heart.
you just roll your eyes at the remark, but before you can continue the retelling of your unfortunes, he gets to it first.
"but that's not why you're here tonight, currently drowning in misery?"
you go tight-lipped at that, eventually caving.
"it's not."
this time, he leans in and rest both his hands on the table, never breaking eye contact with you and only making you more nervous about the confession that's to come.
what would he think?
through most of the times that you've known him and seonghwa, you practically spent it denying ever developing any sort of romantic feelings for san, even when they teased you relentlessly about it.
so how would he feel when you tell him that same boy is also the current cause of the misery you're going through?
"tell me about it," he urges in a calm and friendly manner that still makes you have to swallow down the tension in your throat.
"what happened with yunho was a couple months ago," you say, "it was hard. of course it was. but it would've been even worse... if not for san." you almost whisper his name.
"he really helped me during the time. it honestly was nice to be able to talk to just anyone about it." because you're sure hongjoong can already deduce the fact you don't have anyone else besides yunho.
"and it was nice," you continue, " until it wasn't."
"and why is that?" hongjoong asks, his tone slightly teasing though you miss it completely, too immersed in the retelling.
"because..." you linger, biting your bottom lip and no longer able to look hongjoong in the eyes.
"because you've developed feelings for him?" he says, like it's the most obvious thing in the world, immediately pulling back your gaze as you can only stare dumbfoundedly.
"it's okay. nothing to be ashamed of." he chuckles, making your brows pinch together. "can't say i'm surprised. did think it was only a matter of time."
"wasn't like i planned to," you say, slightly annoyed, because you have no idea what he meant by his last comment.
hongjoong shrugs. "lots of things in life won't go the way we always plan. you know now."
"but only a matter of time for what? for when i'll like him? i never even considered it until some times ago."
"no. i know that. i meant it was only a matter of time till you returned the sentiment considering he's been hung up on you for so long."
you're now even more confused than you were, answering him swiftly, "hung up? as in he likes me?" the response causing the loudest chuckle of the night to erupt from hongjoong, even if he knows he shouldn't be laughing.
you have such a warped view of love, having it ever being in the form of idealizing yunho, he's also not surprise you have no idea that the reason san follows and pesters you all the time isn't because he's doing it to be annoying and make your life harder but because it might've been the only form to get your attention, and he wants it because he likes you--romantically.
hongjoong caught onto that as early as his second encounter with san.
you have wanted to grab a quick snack and drink before your class in an hour and invited hongjoong along, the both of you caught up in a conversation and forgetting about why you even came in the first place, when a tap on the table makes you forget what you were gonna tell him.
"hi," san greets, glaring down at you and smiling even if you're already exasperating just at the sight of him.
hongjoong met a lot of people at the last party, a few he's already forgotten, but he remembers san fondly mainly because he couldn't keep his eyes off of you all night (and cause you went off on a tangent about him not leaving you alone).
wherever he, you, and seonghwa were going, he found the boy following; if not physically, then always with a watchful gaze.
"i saw you didn't get anything to drink so i got you your favorite," he says, settling down the cup of hibiscus iced tea that you shoot to with lasers in your eyes.
"i don't want it," you blurt, not even bothering to look at him as you say it, because he's done more than enough to annoy you this week alone. and now running into him here, too.
"but i got it especially for you, made with love." his voice high and cheery, paying no attention to the irritation seeping from your body language and tone.
you stand up from the seat with a sigh, telling hongjoong you'll be back and head for the women's restroom.
"what's her problem?" san questions, scoffing and taking the seat you were just occupying. "i was just trying to do something nice."
"i don't know. maybe she's just pissed from a certain dickhead following her around all week," hongjoong says sarcastically, san raising an eyebrow in return before he shrugs it off.
"nothing that i also didn't do the week before."
"a pleasant person you sound," hongjoong quips, the both of them holding a stare-off so strong, the tension could probably shatter glass.
"and you are?" though san says it calmly, there's an edge in his delivery that's testing hongjoong's endurance.
"someone that actually respects her enough to not follow her around like a creep."
san snickers from the comment, a smirk overtaking his face.
"you don't have to act all high and mighty when you're just sticking around for the chance to get laid," san snarks, the smugness and such childishness from a person making hongjoong see red, but he manages to contain himself.
"we're just friends, but you can think whatever you wanna think. something tells me you're dying to be in my position, though," hongjoong bites back, the smirk on san's lips slowly fading at the last remark.
because he's seen it, the way san looks at him and seonghwa with envy and resentment written all over him.
but despite the initial harshness of the encounter, san grew on hongjoong overtime and vice versa.
they weren't close by any means (mostly because you wouldn't have allowed it), but they were able to be within the same proximity and actually have a good time together; the young boy even sharing a few of his interests.
"yes, he likes you," hongjoong says, holding back the amusement as if having to reiterate it to a kid. "why else would me and seonghwa continuously tease you about him?"
"but it doesn't make any sense."
you swear you're not that dense, but you mostly just didn't consider it because of the way san is. he did nothing but consistently went out of his way to irritate you, only until the whole yunho and your sister shenanigans did you start seeing a different side of him.
"plus, if he likes me, then why would he sleep with other girls? flirt with them and kiss them?" just saying it brings back that same queasy sensation, similar to when you saw the girl back at san's place.
hongjoong thinks about it. he isn't san, but in comparison to you, he's had far more experiences when it comes to relationships and dating, so he can offer a theory or two.
"i can't say exactly because i'm not him, but my guess is, he doesn't see it as wrong necessarily because you two aren't together."
"but he's also dated people. he was in relationships," you tell hongjoong more passionately, as if demanding for an immediate explanation to this nonsense.
"people date and are in relationships with others they don't like or love all the time," he answers nonchalantly.
but it doesn't make you feel any better, nor did it answer anything.
"so he's just an asshole and this is a mistake?"
hongjoong sighs and face palms, shaking his head before recollecting himself.
"maybe. maybe not. but one thing for sure is that he likes you, and everything you just asked me now, he can answer it himself."
you let his words linger in silence, picking your head up again when he speaks.
"anything else you wanna get off your chest?"
you bat your lashes and bite your lips before telling him, "i-i also might've told him i'm gonna be leaving for japan although i haven't notified my boss of the final decision, yet."
hongjoong tilts his head and quirks his lips to the side, about to say something when someone in the crowd calls out to him.
"yeah i'll be there in a quick sec!" he yells back.
"it's okay, you can go," you assure, appreciative of his time.
he nods. "yeah, i'm afraid i can't keep them waiting any longer. but hey, i hope you figure things out with san and reach out to me if you want. my number is still the same."
"for sure," you reply with a smile.
"but you good? think you can get home by yourself?" he asks worriedly.
"yeah, i'm good. i can call a cab."
"alright. safe trip," he says one last time before standing up, but you stop him midway with a soft call of his name before he can disappear from your sight.
"i'm sorry... for what i said and did that day," you tell him, looking and sounding as apologetic as one can be, because you truly are.
he doesn't say anything until a few seconds later, the blank expression turning into a softer smile.
"apology accepted. i'm also sorry for that day."
"apology accepted."
going off on your own without letting san know the real reason why might lead to one of the biggest mistakes you'll make. but you're not sure if going to his place right now is the right choice, either.
you make your way to the floor he's on, doing the best you can to shut out any images from the other day; standing in front of his door while your heart beats loudly into your ears and stalling even further to think of what he could be up to at 11 in the night.
he might be asleep, or he might not even be home--or there's a good chance he's relieving the stress of today's event the way you know he would, but you'd rather not think about it.
the press to the doorbell is slow and hesitant at first, but you ring it three times at least, standing still for a good minute; the anxiety and nervousness from before replaced by a strange disappointment that he actually really might not be home.
with a low sigh, you turn your back to the door in defeat, barely two steps out when it flings open behind you, bringing back the nervousness from before as you swallow down the knot.
"y/n?" he calls out, your back still to him.
and oh how comforted you are just to hear his voice again, even if it hasn't even been a full day since you two last talked.
you finally face him with batting lashes as you meet his eyes, seeing his hair is still wet and he has a towel hanging over his shoulder, he was probably in the shower when you came ringing.
"hey," you say quietly, your lips drawing a thin smile because this is really awkward. you've never been in this situation with san before, obviously.
"what are you doing here?" he asks softly. "i mean, not that i'm not relieved to see you, but just that... you know, what happened today." his voice thins out toward the end, like he isn't sure if he's supposed to be bringing it up this soon.
but you're glad he does.
"i-i want to talk to you about it... truthfully, this time," you tell him, biting back for a short second before continuing. "is it okay if i come in?"
he doesn't hesitate to nod. "yeah, of course." moving out of the way and widening the frame for you.
everything is and looks the same as last time you were here, duh, but the air is different. it could be due to the fight this evening, or that there's a clear change in your relationship with san and how you view him.
you don't know whether to stand or sit, fidgeting and watching san walk over and plop himself down on the sofa in front of you, a chuckle escaping him when he catches onto the sight.
"you just gonna stand the entire time, or?" he teases, prompting an eye roll in return as you sit down in the very same spot you've sat plenty of times before.
taking in his body language and treatment of you so far, you wonder if this is just how san is. that he copes in a way that seems as if nothing is really bothering him... or maybe he got over it, you don't know.
he seemed upset earlier, but anything can happen in a matter of hours.
the thickest silence enters only a moment after, and it's only fair you take the initiative since you came to find him, and it was also you that made it a problem in the first place.
"earlier," you start cautiously, "i wasn't in the right headspace at all."
you wait for a reaction from him before adding anything else, afraid you'll bombard him with too much at once.
"it's okay. i could tell something was bothering you, but it bothered me too because i could also tell you weren't being honest."
you almost wanna cower because just him saying it already makes you feel guilty.
"and a big decision like that doesn't get made overnight. you were fine the day before. something big must've had to happen for you to change your mind so quickly, right?" the way he stares so deeply as if searching for an answer; the desperation in his voice is felt and only worsening your guilt.
"yeah, something did happen," you say, not sure where to begin but beginning nonetheless.
his features twist, glaring at you with a mix of sympathy and curiosity.
"is it... about yunho?" he asks carefully.
san enjoys the time he spent with you; even more than he would have thought, and though you both didn't start off on the best path, he sees potentials in the relationship changing for the better--not even romantically (he don't know if that's possible), but to where you two could be friends for once in the 20 plus years you guys have known each other.
for a bit, it seemed like it was finally happening. but maybe in your head and heart, yunho will always occupy a special kind of space he cannot compete with, no matter how hard he tries.
"no," you answer, much to san's surprise, taking a long pause and then finally telling him what made you so upset that you considered moving across the sea. "i saw her when i was coming up to your place yesterday."
you have no idea how he's gonna to take it; if it's something to boost his ego or maybe he'll just laugh it off because it's actually so dumb, but you try to figure which is it gonna be, gaze never leaving his sight.
but san raises a brow as if trying to decipher what you mean, then it hits him.
"nari?" he squeaks.
yes, nari. the one you're sure is with him at most parties, and also probably the one he was with that one time you ran into him coming out of a bedroom looking all kinds of fucked up.
you've seen san with a variety of girls through the years, but she's easily the most recognizable.
san looks to still be in his thoughts, now attempting to piece together what is it about nari being here yesterday that could make you so upset.
and when you see his puzzled expression slowly replaced by a smirk that only gets bigger, you know he's figured it out.
"are you... perhaps, jealous?" he says, the slyest tone ever gracing your ears, raising the temperature on your cheeks as they probably burn a bright pink.
you're blushing because of choi san... just incredible.
when you're still to prideful to admit it, he gets off from where he was sitting and shamelessly throws himself down next to you, making you scoot over as a reflex, but he goes out of his way to close the space between you two.
he's so close now, face merely inches away and pestering you to answer while you refuse to meet his eyes.
"you were jealous, right?" he tilts his head, tone annoying but also flirty.
"shut up," you spit, finally facing him and able to pick up his natural scent from this angle, you actually can't believe you'd even think about how attractive he looks in a moment like this.
his showered hair, bare face, and the proximity that makes the scene much more intimate--
"it's not funny," you add, because the smirk isn't leaving him at all, and now he's laughing, too.
"it's only because i think you're cute," he says, now suddenly swinging an arm around your shoulders and pulling you in even closer. "like i swear, you didn't give a rat ass about me less than two months ago. did i finally win your heart?"
it feels like he's deflecting, so you try your best to ignore the antics, persisting with all seriousness, "so are you gonna explain yourself?" you haven't cracked a smile even once.
the bigger grin on his face mellows out into a softer smile.
"we didn't do anything," he says calmly, much to a silence from you because you're hoping he has more to say than that, which he does. "i had her over because i wanted to talk to her about something."
"like... what?"
he snickers at such coyness that you're doing an awful job at hiding.
"that i think it's best me and her stop whatever we had going on."
you can only blink because it's not exactly the response you were expecting, asking in a low voice, "and why is that so?"
"because i had a good feeling about you, and that you were gonna stay."
it turns so quiet after, you think you can hear the footsteps littering outside the hall; san's answer making you feel all sorts of way, you're not sure how to react.
"i'm sorry," you finally say out loud, the look on san unchanging even through all of this. "it was just overwhelming in the moment and it was as if nothing could make it better... especially after everything."
"it's fine," he assures. "i just can't believe you made such a life-changing decision because of that. is it too late to take it back?" he's a mixture of being absolutely serious and half laughing.
"yeah, about that... i, uh, i haven't told my boss, yet."
because it is big, and it is life-changing, and maybe you were hoping there could be something else that could convince you to stay.
san stares at you in disbelief before he cracks out a chuckle again, shaking his head.
"you're crazy," he mumbles, the comment prompting an eye roll from you.
"you scared me so much," san goes on. "i don't know what i would've done if you really left."
there's a brief stare-off before you blank and move your gaze to the coffee table at the end of your feet, mind suddenly drawing back to the encounter with hongjoong.
"i ran into hongjoong before i came here," you tell him, his head perking with interests. "i was drinking and he came in with his group of music junkies."
san only listens, giving you the space to talk until you ask of him yourself.
"you know what he told me?"
"what?"
you chuckle lightly before you can even get the words out; san watching in amusement and pondering as to what you could find so funny.
"he said that you have liked me for a long time," you say, no longer afraid to look him in the eyes while your heart beats silently but loud to your own ears, hongjoong's words replaying in your head while you await a response.
“maybe. maybe not. but one thing for sure is that he likes you, and everything you just asked me now, he can answer it himself.”
san quirks his lips to the side and shrugs half-heartedly, his relaxed manner tells you he's just teasing you but honestly, san can be hard to read.
then he finally answers, after you're about to open your big mouth again, "i guess that's why i never liked being around hongjoong much, even if he's cool... the guy can be too observant."
he pretty much confirms it without saying so, a part of you relieved and then another now realizing you're gonna have to carry the conversation and decide what you wanna do with this... information. if you even have to do anything.
"since when?" you ask, just a little curious and wondering.
he hums and removes the arm that was around your shoulders this entire time to cross it with his other one as his back falls to the couch.
"to be honest, it comes and goes. but the very first time i remember liking you was actually when i first met you."
even at the age of nine, he thought you were the prettiest girl he's ever seen. the way you dressed and the way you always did your hair, putting it in a high ponytail or a bun; and the way you liked to wear red and black most of the times made it easy to pick you out.
he was too young at the time and didn't know how to go about having a crush on someone, so he might've done a thing or two to piss you off, and it also didn't help that you were an emo ass kid as hard-headed as a rock.
you didn't just treat him that way, but also everybody else. everybody except yunho.
he loves his brother and has more than a civil relationship with him now, but he just never really understood what was it about yunho that made him so special to you.
"i mean, of course, you were mean as hell, but it's complicated," he adds, shaking his head and snickering quietly at the fact.
but you're more fixated on something else he just said, reiterating, "it comes and goes as in... sometimes you would like me and sometimes you wouldn't?"
“yes, he likes you,” hongjoong says, holding back the amusement as if having to reiterate it to a kid. “why else would me and seonghwa continuously tease you about him?”
“but it doesn’t make any sense.”
“plus, if he likes me, then why would he sleep with other girls? flirt with them and kiss them?” just saying it brings back that same queasy sensation, similar to when you saw the girl back at san’s place.
"i guess you can put it that way?" his voice raises in pitch, as if unsure himself. "it's quite difficult to put in words."
"make me understand," you state in all seriousness.
because again, your biggest doubt when it comes to san is his ability to commit to you and only you. even if you wanna believe him, and he's proven himself the past couple of months that he can surprise you in good ways, what happened with yunho and your sister might've instilled some newfound trauma and trust issues.
you watch as he catches his breath and seems to linger on his thoughts for a few seconds more.
he starts, "there were times i really liked you, the feelings can be quite intense. like that one time when we both were dazed as hell and we kissed, it felt surreal. or whenever i think you look super hot in a certain outfit, the feeling also creeps up again. i also enjoy our banters, and pretty much any time we have a somewhat normal interaction, i would also get it."
you listen attentively with your stomach and chest doing something funny just hearing san speak about you this way.
"then there would be those times... times where you would annoy me and i'd think you're a total bitch. like when you insulted me in front of my friends or just the way you'd always flop around yunho like he's jesus or something. plus, my feelings and the chances of it actually happening are two different things, so it not being an exclusive relationship overall made it easy for me to do whatever i want."
“i can’t say exactly because i’m not him, but my guess is, he doesn’t see it as wrong necessarily because you two aren’t together.”
hongjoong pretty much got it spot on, and you suppose san doesn't owe you any allegiance. that would be ridiculous.
"well that's good to know," is all you say, still trying to process everything.
"what about you?" he asks coyly. "when did you start liking me?"
the question takes you aback, always so bold and daring, but now only staring back like a little deer caught in headlights.
"probably when i was most desperate, i don't know," you joke, a chuckle bubbling out of san. "no, but really, i think it's just when you were there for me when i needed someone the most."
you almost wanna cower because just talking about such a thing with san makes you feel cringe and embarrassed, and he sees it all over your face.
"that's nice to hear." he smiles, the sight pleasant to look at; the genuine happiness on him because you're saying so many nice things about him tonight.
there's a quick pause as you both think of what to say next, knowing what kind of questions and conversation usually follows, but not wanting to be the first to say it.
"so are you gonna be staying?" he changes subject, because you might not wanna get to that part, yet.
your eyes sparkles with something mischievous and playful, answering him, "well, i don't have much reasons to leave now, do i?"
he smirks and nods.
"yeah, i guess you don't." his tone changes the next and sounding much serious. "i was happy to see that it was you at the door. i was afraid this evening could've been our last meeting."
the reminder brings back a pang of guilt as you feel yourself shrinking on the couch.
"again, i'm sorry. just still trying to learn how to deal my emotions... efficiently at least."
"no, i understand. in the end, you came back and made up for it."
"i did." you smile lightly. you couldn't have done it without hongjoong.
there's a comfortable silence before san exhales and turns his head toward the kitchen, then back to you.
"have you eaten?"
you shake your head. "no, but i'm good. i should probably get back. i don't wanna be late to work tomorrow."
"i can drive you back, if you don't mind."
given you don't look like you're in the best condition, and along with a rosy scent he's always known you by, there's a whisk of alcohol that you've even admitted to, though you surprisingly look and sound more than coherent.
--
the car ride is quiet but comfortable as you both let the music fill the air. some songs you don't recognize, but it does goes perfectly with the night as san weaves through lanes a little too fast--something you'd probably yell at him for if you were in a more sober state of mind.
but tonight has gone so well and you don't wanna take any chances of ruining it.
he parks just right outside the gate of your parents place, unlocking the doors and snapping to you.
"here it is," he says.
"you not gonna go say hi to your parents or yunho?" you tease, considering his parents place and family is just next door.
"nah." he shakes his head. "it's too late, and i'm sure they already know i love them."
you smile and unbuckle your seatbelt. "alright."
he nods, and you both just sit there for a moment too long; the unspoken words and uncertainty as equally bothering to you as it is to him, but you're not sure how to bring it up.
you just know you don't wanna end the night without talking about it, at least.
"hey," you say softly, your voice quiet and blending into the night while san doesn't look away from you one bit. "i, uhm... i'll think about it, okay? i mean, if you want me to."
you're stammering and sounding the most awkward you've been all night (which is a feat), that san can't help but to laugh it off. and he knows you're not talking about the decision to stay.
"yeah, of course. take your time. you know i'll be here," he assures, always having a way to make you feel secure and listened to.
"i appreciate it," you mumble, sending him one last smile, about ready to head out. "thank you by the way."
he returns the smile and nods. "no problem."
"i'll get going then," you say, opening the door halfway and about to leave, but instead taking a deep breath as you turn to san, which surprises him.
he blinks in bewilderment. "did you--"
then it happens. a quick peck to his lips before pulling away to his stunned gaze, backing yourself out of the car and giggling.
"goodnight," you coo teasingly, shutting the door and waving him off.
it's crazy how just a week ago, there was a chance you were gonna be flying across the sea to go live in another country.
how much more sad and unhappy you felt; as if that was your only option left. but now already feeling two times better with your future looking a little more than just bleak.
you have surely told your boss you're gonna stay; the news a relief to him because it would cost a lot more resources having to find a replacement, as well as provide the proper training.
and you have surely talked to the landlord of the complex you were seeking a while ago that you're gonna take the place, after which she so kindly walked you through all the steps and what documents you needed to provide.
you just finished going over the contract with her the day prior, and all you need to do now is pay the deposit.
you should be able to move in by friday, she said.
when you told your family about the move, you weren't surprised they didn't seem to care all that much--your parents, at least. minjeong visibly took the news a lot harder.
even if you guys didn't have the best relationship growing up and aren't that close even now, the house's gonna feel a lot more empty now, she said. she's gotten used to you being around for more than 20 years now.
but you think a part of your parents are just relieved to finally have you out of the house and start life on your own after being with them for so long. you'd rather think of it that way, but after all, not like it's gonna matter all that much when you are moved out.
you also swallowed your pride and finally reached out to both hongjoong and seonghwa again (you're still a tad ashamed by the events that followed even if hongjoong had given you the green light).
you all have set up a time and place to meet up next month when you all should be available, so that's something to look forward to.
san has been helping you window shop for furnitures, recommending which he thinks is best based on his experiences and whatnot, though you made sure you tell him you want interior as minimalistic as possible.
clean and just overall simple.
you'll be moving most of the things from your current room to the new one, taking your bed that's an actual necessity with, so you'll worry about actually purchasing furnitures when you're finally moved into the place.
as for things with san, it's always a gamble regarding what's gonna go down whenever you do hang out with him.
on some occasions, he'd act completely normal and treat you as a friend similar to before. then more than half the time, he'd flirt and bring up the peck from a week ago, but never going further than that.
you feel as if you're both currently pushing and pulling and playing a game of who's gonna crack first.
"tomorrow," you tell san over the phone, currently ripping everything from posters to every pieces of decorations that might've been there since you were in high school, off of your walls.
it took a day later than expected to process all the paperworks and everything, but you finally received a call earlier that you can finally move in tomorrow on saturday.
yunho must've heard about it from your sister or san, because you definitely did not tell him nor have you even talked to him in a while. but he texted you this morning if you needed any help with the move, to which you kindly declined though thanked him for the offer.
he asked how you were doing and you said you were doing better. that you're excited to finally have your own place and for what's to come after that.
you and san seems close lately, you recall one of his texts at the top of your head.
yeah, a little, you responded.
"i'll be there, definitely," san replies back. "anything for you, my dear."
you grimace at the pet name and scoffs.
"and who said you can call me that?" you throw the things you've managed to gather into the cardboard box on the floor.
"don't act like you don't like it. anyway, i'll be there at 8 a.m. sharp."
"for what you just said, make that 7."
before you can end the call, you hear his laughter from the other line.
--
"and i want the t.v. stand over here... no! over here!" you talk to yourself, pointing to exact spots and ponder just how you want everything to be.
"a little help?" san's voice come from behind you, muffled by the box he's carrying until he plops it down near the kitchen, all out of breath.
"you're a big boy, you got it," you brush off the complaint, walking back to the bedroom and seeing your mattress flat on the floor, already huffing at the thought of having to build the bed frame back up again.
you hear the shut of the front door, san's voice piercing into the bedroom.
"that should be the last of it. for today at least."
you turn to head back into the living room, barely making it through the doorway when you thump against his chest, rubbing your forehead after as you look up at him.
"don't i get something for helping you out?" he says, tone sly and cunning, you don't even wanna admit what it does to your heart.
he's been doing this a lot more often--say things with the slightest innuendos behind them just to get a reaction out of you. or maybe he's trying to see how far he can push now that there's been a change of dynamic. kind of.
but you remain unfazed by his comment, keeping your ground and telling him, "if you come by later, i'll make dinner for you in return."
he looks over your shoulder to the unfinished bedroom.
"don't you need help with the bed frame?"
you shake your head. "i got it. plus, i've bothered you enough for today, so i'll let you go for now."
"i don't mind staying to help."
"no. i need some time to settle in. and, we still got a lot more work to do tomorrow."
he hesitates, but eventually gives in. that it's more about you needing this time to yourself; in a new environment and finally a place to call your own.
"alright. but if you need me, call me."
"i will."
he walks to the door as you follow behind, holding the door open for him while he now lingers in the hallway facing you.
"i'll come by later, though. i'm not forgetting that."
you chuckle and lightly roll your eyes.
"yeah, of course. and bring a drink or two. we'll celebrate."
"for you finally having your own place."
"for me finally having my own place," you repeat, a smile on your lips mirroring san's.
you spend most of the day setting up the bedroom and assembling the bed frame, thankfully remembering where everything goes from the top of your head because you threw out the instructions maybe five years ago.
you unbox everything and attempt to place the decorations where you think they look best for now, shoving all the empty boxes into a corner after for the next morning when you'll have to take out the trashes.
the living room is empty. no couches, no nothing because you haven't bought anything; the area for now only consisting of a rug and a small table you brought from your previous room because you and san need somewhere to sit and eat on.
when you're sure you're done with all the unboxing for the day, you run for the grocery store just around the corner, grabbing a pot, a pan, other essentials, then the ingredients.
it's almost 5 in the afternoon by the time you start cooking, and though it's been a long day, something about it feels accomplishing. being by yourself, cooking in your own apartment and not having to worry about anything else.
it might be too soon to say, but you think you've made the right choice.
as the stew's just about to be done, there's a knock at the door that you happily skip to, flinging the frame open to no one other than san with a plastic bag around one of his arms.
"hey," you greet.
"hey," he returns, taking it upon himself to walk in as if it's his own home, a strong aroma hitting his nose immediately. "wow, it smells good in here."
"i did say i was gonna cook," you say, shutting the door.
"yes, and i brought a drink or two just like you said." he wiggles the bag in his arm, then peeking over the pot boiling on the stove. "whatchu' cooking?"
"kimchi stew," you answer. "but i also bought some ramen just in case."
"that's perfect," he says, walking over and setting down the bag of drinks onto the floor just right next to the small table.
"sorry. i'm still working on getting a dining set." you half chuckle at the sad sight of the current setup.
"this will do."
he works on setting the drinks: two simple bottle of sojus he got on the way here because tonight isn't about having fun or whatever. he wants it to be meaningful, maybe even sweet.
you place the still hot stew in the middle, going back to the kitchen to grab two small bowls and utensils, handing him his and finally able to rest peacefully across from him while the steam from the pot blocks your view of each other.
"so how is it so far?" he asks, being the one to start.
"good," you answer, the same time you go in with a spoon for a taste test.
"feels nice, doesn't it? like you have all the freedom in the world." san does the same, his eyes lighting up when he's able to digest the flavor. "wow. you're amazing, y/n."
you can't help but roll your eyes, still trying to slowly settle into the way he'd just casually compliment you with such sincereness.
"i'm glad you think so. but yes, it is like as if i have all the freedom in the world. for now, at least." you chuckle, and he follows shortly after.
"in a month or so, let me know how you feel again."
you nod to his words, the next minute an air of silence as you both busy yourself with the food and drink.
it's more than past 6, the sky outside turning a darker color and painting the neighborhood more empty.
you're just about done with swallowing the portion of your food when a thought crosses, being the one to start speaking again.
"were you the one who told yunho i was moving?"
he looks up from his bowl at that with blinking eyes, placing it down on the table and shakes his head, his mouth still full.
"why would i do that? then i'd have competitions for who's gonna help you move in."
you laugh at that, placing your utensils down and resting your hands on your lap.
"how's yunho?" you ask, because even if you don't wanna think about it, yunho has been a part of your life. someone you clung onto for a large chunk of it, and it wouldn't be realistic if you were completely over it within just the span of a few months.
you no longer want to be with him, and you no longer think of the what ifs, but it does sting and ache a little when the reminder of the events comes up once in a while.
still, you wouldn't change anything and any regrets you've had, you feel you've already made amends with; only hoping to not make any more.
"he's been doing good," san answers. "the best i've seen from him in a while."
you smile, mumbling, "that's good to hear."
you don't know if you could ever say it to your sister, but for what it is-- whether good or bad, they deserve each other. yunho and her.
they've always been more alike and compatible than you and yunho could ever be and it was something you struggled accepting for the longest time.
"what about you? how are you doing?" san questions, catching your gaze in his. "i know it hasn't been easy."
because san acknowledges it, too. how much yunho meant to you. that you used to see nothing and no one else but only yunho.
"better," you assure, a soft and comforting smile on your lips while you pause and hold the exact words you want to say, letting it go when you feel most ready. "better because of you."
you see san swallowing and his food and the chopsticks he was previously holding now forgotten on the table as he continues giving you his full attention.
"you were there for me when i needed someone the most, and you're still here for me. i don't know..." you practically murmur the last part, shaking your head and chuckling quietly, "i liked yunho a lot because it seemed he was the first person who accepted me for who i am."
you sound like a broken record at this point, but talking about it--your feelings, and especially to san helps you understand it better.
"i was too stupid and uncaring in the eyes of my parents, and too odd and indecipherable in the eyes of everyone else. kind of ironic, isn't it? i hated the fact people judged me without knowing me when i, too, judged you without knowing enough of you."
san listens and he knows this is it. you're pouring all of your heart out with nothing left to hide, whether it's things you've already said or haven't.
you ramble on, "i mean, i always thought some of them might end up liking me if they got to know me, and then that turned out to be true for you, too. i got to know more about you and i do like you..."
san feels his heart caving in, wondering if this might be it as well. a moment he's been waiting so long to happen but unsure if you wanted it as soon and as much as he does.
"is this a confession?" he tries his best for it to come out as light hearted as possible, an attempt to conceal just how on edge he actually is.
there's a pause before you answer, shaky voice and all. "i guess so."
but san doesn't celebrate his victory too early, yet; a "but" coming out of you quick enough to stop him.
"i'm just afraid," you finally admit to him the very thing weighing you down, and why even though you like him, you're just the slightest skeptical actually doing something about it.
"what are you afraid of?" he asks concernedly, desperate to resolve all and any doubts you have.
you take a short breath. "just the entire thing with yunho... i keep fearing the same thing will happen. when i texted you that night that i was going to japan, it wasn't just because i was jealous, but also because it made me realize if i was only replacing yunho with you. i know that's not the case because what i feel for you is different from what i felt for yunho, but i still can't shake it off."
you're talking so fast, you don't even catch the exact moment san's already moved from across you to right beside you, taking your hands into his and looking you in the eyes.
"i promise you that what happened with yunho won't happen with me," he says, passion in his voice wishing for you to believe him. "i will make sure it won't."
and you do want to believe him. end all the doubts and skepticism here, but you also wanna be honest.
"but the way you are, san... it makes it hard for me even if i wanna believe you. you change girls like you change your underwear. how would i know for sure giving this a chance won't be a mistake?"
you can feel the way san tenses up at the harsher words, maybe a hint of hurt in his dull eyes, but he gathers himself rather quickly for his turn.
"i understand. i don't blame you given i don't exactly have the best track record, and i don't know for sure if this is gonna be a mistake, but i do wanna give it a chance... if you want, of course."
he takes a short pause before continuing, "i've never been with two girls at once, and i always broke things off if i don't see it working out. and if i don't want anything serious, i let them know. but i've never felt the way i'm feeling for you right now for anyone else, ever, and it's something that i'm sure of the more i'm with you."
you blink at that, your stomach tightening and breath shallow, the scene much more intense and real than the first night when you two first talked about this mutual interest.
"i always thought that it was because we grew up together, and that definitely played some part, but i also grew up with minjeong and never really felt anything particular about her. i do like you a lot, so let the decision be in your hand whether you want more out of this or not. you already know my answer."
his grip on your hands has become looser with time, the food and drink now long forgotten, the only thing in your mind is the way he's looking at you and how important your next few words are.
"we can give it a try," you slowly and quietly answer, watching san's pupils go wide as he breaks out into a wide smile after.
"thank you," he manages to say calmly and coolly despite his body feeling anything but that.
he places a kiss to the top of your hand, prompting you to pull away in fake disgust and a laughter.
"i guess dreams do come true after all," he jokes, another one that makes you roll your eyes, feeling a little shy all of a sudden.
"well i'm gonna go wash my dishes," you attempt to switch the subject, grabbing your bowl and untensils and head for the kitchen.
san quirks an eyebrow and raises his voice from his seat.
"but there's still so much food left." he stares at the amount left, then back to you, getting off the floor himself to follow behind, watching as you turn on the faucet and completely ignore him.
"oh i know what this is." he smirks, overtaking your hand and turning off the faucet, finally getting a reaction out of you as you snap your neck his way. "you're shy."
you blink, swallowing a quick knot and shake your head.
"i'm not," you say, turning back to aim for the faucet, but san beats you again, a stare-off ensuing with amusement written all over his eyes.
"you are. is it because it's weird we're practically girlfriend and boyfriend now?" he tilts his head.
hearing the terms out loud definitely is weird, you can't even deny the fact, instead nodding your head that gets a snicker out from san.
"yeah, it's gonna take some time for sure." he smiles, and the volume and tone at which he says it almost like he's trying to seduce you.
you've just realized how sensual and close you guys are at this angle. your back against the sink and chest basically rubbing his own as he's cornered you into this state, gawking down at you with a look that makes you wanna cower.
the quietest air goes by with his head only lowering each second, and you realize it, too, that you wanna kiss him just as bad.
with a close of your eyes, his lips is on yours the next, still at first, then slowly moving in an attempt to find the perfect rhythm until you respond.
your hands find itself resting on the counter of the sink as the kiss makes your back dig into the edge. it isn't messy nor done sloppily despite how long san's been waiting for the moment again.
it's rather clean but passionate, giving san a kick back to the night he got to taste you for the first time even if you both weren't in the right state of minds, but it's one he doesn't forget easily.
both his grip has made way to rest at your hips, giving it a light squeeze and it doesn't take long for your arms to come up and around his shoulders, the scene taking a quick turn and you feel yourself losing your breath with each passing second.
when you both finally pull away, you nor san know how many minutes has gone by, only that his hair is already messy and tangled when you haven't even done much to it, and you're still trying to catch your breath.
you're the first to break into a small giggle with san following after, his grip still at your hips and your arms still around his shoulders.
"wow. that kiss already made me hard as a rock," san blurts, breaking the immersion as you roll your eyes.
"yeah, i can tell," you reply, shifting your legs slightly because the entire time, san's boner was pressing down on it.
he laughs shamelessly, proceeding to press only harder because he likes seeing your reaction, and he takes it you're fine with it because you're no longer fighting it.
"tell me, are you the type to have sex first date?" he asks, his head slightly tilted and honestly looking so attractive.
"not really," you answer. "but is this really a first date?" you say it with the tiniest slyness and coyness, a lot of initial hesitation but when you really think about it, there's no reason to not sleep with san at this point.
especially at your age and with the little experiences you have, it's about time. beside, you always hear it's good to know and discover your sexual chemistry with someone in the early stages, because often than not, incompatibilities in that regard can destroy a relationship perfectly fine in other aspects.
"you're right." san smirks, causing a small squeak from you when he snakes his arms aroud your butt suddenly and lifts you onto the counter, but you stop him before he can do anything else.
"wait. can we do this in the bedroom instead? i'd just prefer my kitchen to be, you know... clean, since this is where i cook."
he laughs, catching the way your eyelashes would flutter cutely and nods his head, helping you down onto the floor again.
"thanks," you say, barely able to fix the wrinkles of your pants when he grabs your wrist and leads you to the bedroom, proceeding to throw you down on the bed the softest he can as he hovers over you.
the current position a bit unreal because san never really thought it would happen.
"just out of curiosity," san starts, "have you ever slept with yunho?"
you bite your lower lip and shake your head. "never any penetrations. he always said that should wait till marriage."
it's not that you didn't wanna sleep with yunho, but the other way around it seems. and now you know why.
san quirks his lips to the side and accepts the answer.
"if i did, would you not want to sleep with me anymore?" you ask just for the sake of his response, mirth in your eyes and amusement hanging by your tongue.
he cranks an eyebrow and actually thinks about it.
"that would be kind of nasty, i'm not gonna lie," he says, much to a laughter in response. "so i'm glad that's not the case."
"yeah, thankfully," you say after, teasing him slightly.
the both of you stay still for a few seconds more before san takes it as a sign to lower his lips again to capture yours for another kiss.
he lets his body fall on top of yours gently, his weight heavy but nice as you're comforted by the warmth of his skin that makes you feel even closer to him.
you hear and feel him shift, lifting his left arm off the bed to find the end of your shirt and bury his fingers underneath to where the bare of your skin is.
you can't help the low whimper at the sensation of his fingers crawling on your skin and making way to where your bra is, flinching just the slightest when his entire hand cups the shape of your breast.
he breaks the kiss to look down at your already messy state, whispering, "always wanted to know how these felt." the comment making you bite at your lower lip again, something so alluring about the way he says it.
you take it upon yourself to sit up, san removing his hand to watch you undress your top, the way you do it so sensually and almost teasingly like a scene straight from some porn video.
he's almost too into the sight, he forgets you're actually in front of him all flesh and bones, until you've already rid of everything and calling his name.
your titties out and spilling, the actual thing better than he could have imagined. better than all those times he'd spend trying to make them out and just picture how your actual breasts look.
"fuck, you're so hot, y/n," he hiss, the frustration on him makes you giggle before he latches on with both his hands and takes a dive, one nipple in his mouth and the other one being fondled with.
a moan escapes your mouth at the wetness of his tongue circling one of your nipples, throwing your head back to stare at the ceiling and holding back an even louder moan when he squeezes your other one.
it goes on for a few minute at least; how he switches back and forth between your breasts and hand always on the other to make sure it's not neglected, whether he's groping it or playing with it.
"san," you call his name, his eyes shooting up to look at you with lips red from the service. you don't say anything, instead calmly getting on your knees and breaking the contact with san as he tries to guess your next move.
your gaze moves to his crotch area and he gets the message instantly, smirking in return.
he spreads his legs merrily as you crawl closer, one last look of exchange before you reach for the hem of his shorts, pulling it down along his boxer underneath just enough for his hard cock to spring itself out, his length sitting straight up and making you swallow a knot.
he adjusts himself enough for you to sit yourself between his legs, gaining the perfect access to do what you need to do.
with a careful grip, his cock is in your hold as you're stroking it up and down, observing the sight of him rolling his eyes and looking just so hot; all the more reasons you wanna have sex with him.
he isn't too long in length, but his girth is quite thick and just enough for you.
you get ready to take him in, lowering your head each passing second and stroking it faster until your tongue licks over the tip of his cock and he releases the sexiest moan ever as a result.
one of your hands still grip the rest of his cock while your mouth stays on the tip of it until you're there long enough, tilting your head to lick the side and and coating every inch of it before starting from the top again and taking his entire length in the best you can.
there's tears in your eyes the lower you go, but you also know just when to stop, coming back up just below the tip and going down again, repeating the action until you see san is a groaning mess of pleasure.
nothing but "fuck" comes out of his mouth, his right hand having found itself on a bundle of your hair, helping and guiding you as you give him the blowjob of his life.
he lets go and you pull away after some time, both of you huffing and puffing, smiles crossing your lips when both your eyes meet.
"jesus, you suck cock like you've done it a thousand times before," he comments, because his own is still recovering.
you sucked his cock as if yunho wasn't your only sexual experience.
but you only smirk and shrug, replying mischievously, "i have my ways."
he doesn't have time to think about that right now, though. all he wanna do is be inside of you. fuck you into the mattress and make you feel so good, and he's glad you feel the same with how you're already wrapping your arms around him and pulling him down as your back hits the sheet.
he kisses your accepting lips once more before breaking it to ask you, "you ready?" to which you nod and already starts pushing at the hem of your own pants, san helping you when he catches on, thrusting it until it's off all the way with you kicking it onto the floor.
san catches the light pink lace panties you have on, smiling to himself not long before you also throw that off, now left in nothing but to feel the most naked you have ever been in the presence of someone else.
you can feel san's length brushing the inside of your thighs and it only makes you wanna speed up the process, telling him you're ready.
he creeps his fingers to your opening to prep you up, sticking two in and the wetness already coating him that instant while a low grunt escapes your lips.
he takes it out with a pop and you pant, watching as he gives it a once over on his tongue, clearing all residues off his fingers before gripping his cock for your entrance.
it's suddenly as if you've forgotten how to breathe while you just wait for that delicious and burning stretch, groaning when you feel the tip enter, already leaning your head back as you squint your eyes.
then instantaneously and surprisingly, san shoves in his entire cock, the loudest moan yet leaving you and shortly accompanied by a passionate, "shit!" your arms digging into his shoulders already as you try getting used to the feeling.
your collection of dildos and vibrators nothing compared to the real thing as your back arches when he starts moving.
he thinks you look so sexy like this. under him and taking his cock so well. he'll fuck you, and he'll fuck you good for all those times back then when you'd always say you'd never fuck him.
for all those times you'd hurl insults his way and act as if you don't even wanna be in the same room as him.
but he's going to fuck you good, too, because he wanna love you. he wanna be with you and show you the love he's capable of; hoping this is a start.
he buries his face into your neck while he fucks into you, getting grunts and moans in response and he doesn't stop until he feels himself about to come, removing himself from your neck and hair to see the pleasure overtaking your face; a light smirk on your lips and eyes rolled back.
"i'm gonna pull out, okay, baby?" he whispers into your ear that you nod to, placing a kiss to your cheek after and getting up, pulling out of you and leaving your inside so empty now that you've come to love the feeling.
he pumps his cock a few times before shooting his load onto your stomach, your gaze fixated on it before he grabs both your legs and hangs it over his shoulders, going on to scoot you closer with a grip of your waist.
you're not sure what he's gonna do until you feel his warm fingers rubbing over the entrance of your vagina.
"can't leave you hanging," he says simply, his middle finger especially running up and down, then he slowly enters it along with his index as the sensation comes back even if not as fulfilling as his cock.
he keeps thrusting until your wall closes in on his fingers and a look of euphoria crosses your expression, pulling out sloppily and throwing his body down next to yours while you're still trying to catch your breath.
"how are you feeling?" he asks, moving a strand of hair covering your eyes behind your ear.
"good," you answer. "and you?"
"the best i've been in a while."
you both enjoy the temporary silence with the occasional breathing of the other person, staring back at the each other for what feels like a long time and a smile on both your lips.
san finally sits up and blinks down at you, offering a hand.
"let's go get cleaned up, and make sure you pee."
a relationship with san isn't gonna come without problems and challenges, but you suppose love is all about giving it a chance and putting efforts into it, and you wanna put all you've got and see where this goes.
a/n: welp, girls or boys... i am not happy with it but i'm glad it's over lol. (taglist gonna look mad weird bc it was being a bitch / apology to anyone who got tagged like twice. also removed lots of ppl who deactivated)
taglist: @freeandrealme @shingene @cherrychristie @softie00 @crimson-mia
@hexheathen @lixpixstix @atinytease @turtash @moonseonghwa
@justineasian @sannie-pudding @itsokaytobedumb00 @nerdy-kimchi
@fannyxmh @acciocriativity @mel-the-mad-hatter @diorwoo @devilsmatches
@kyume02 @distvrbia @wonwowzers @endeav0rsb1tch
@sannwa @brown88 @eburneon @hotteokhatyu @yeosangsbiceps
@sankatchu @harusoraa @ad0rechuu @woojirang @revehosh
@byunniebaekhyunnie @nabi-sannie @gugggu6gvai @rockstarsanie
@shakalakaboomboo
@yeosangsbbg @yawnzshit @avantalem @lelaleleb @mountiiny
@svintsandghosts @kkayfan @arinyyy
@nevieatiny @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad
@nescaffei @vixensss @santineez
#this has been in my drafts#since april >.<#ateez angst#san x reader#choi san x reader#ateez x reader#ateez series#yunho x reader#ateez smut#san smut#fic: sweetestlies
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[Sif has been looking at you weird for a while...] "Isa." [CRAB!!!] "Uhh, Yeah Sif?" [He's looking straight at you, his eyes piercing you to your bones. He looks kinda creepy like this... Reminds you of all the times you found him reading late at night with his flashlight eye.] "You mind if we talk for a second? Alone." "UMM. YEAH SURE SIF." [CRAB CRAB CRAB CRAB CRABBBBBB] "Are you alright, Isa? I've noticed you doing some... things. You're acting more- There's really no other way to say it, Isa you've been acting dumb. Acting like you're just 'really lucky' whenever you find a key that we need. I know you, Isa. I know you aren't stupid. You're really smart actually, and I know something is up. So what is it? Can I help?" [CRAB CRAB CRAB WHY IS HE ASKING THIS NOW????] "What do you mean? I really have just been getting lucky?! I don't know how I would know where the keys are, I've never been here?!?" [You feel awful lying to them.] "Right. So you finding the switch to the Death Corridor trap instantly isn't something strange? You always trust me to handle traps, and yet you immediately put your hand out in front of me and stopped me before I could look around, and then hit the hidden switch. I know I only have one eye, but that was really well hidden." "But how would I know where it was beforehand? I just had a feeling."
"I don't know Isa, but I know that people with 'a feeling' still jump at massive falling rocks! And I know that people with 'a feeling' don't just nonchalantly strut into The King's chambers and talk before Odile gets a chance to talk to the man who froze her entire home. I know people with 'a feeling' don't grit their teeth hard enough to shatter. Don't act like nobody noticed that either, maybe the others didn't but I did." [!!!] "But, that'd be impossible, right? It's impossible to have been here before-" "Is it? Because you sure seemed to have a few theories! You knew to ask me about Wish Craft, to ask me to read those books! You knew that I could wish properly, you didn't have an inch of doubt on your face when you said how I taught you. You knew that a wish could have given The King the ability to harness Time Craft. Don't think I believed you when you said you didn't wish for anything. I know you're indecisive, but you aren't going to just ignore something I told you either. I know you wouldn't just listen to me tell you how to wish and not bother with it. You aren't callous. [If only he knew... If only he knew how callous you were!]
"I..." "Isa, I know you're not stupid. And you know I'm not stupid either. If I see something, the only thing I can do is observe for more. And all signs right now point to you. Did something happen? Is that... Is that why you're looping in time? Did-"
"Oh Siffrin... Why? Why did you have to figure it out now? Why couldn't you have figured it out before? Why couldn't you have never figured it out?" "Isa, I-" "Can't you see? It's too late now. Nobody can help, now. It's already too late. Because I was too much of a coward to try and ask for help. Because I was too much of a coward to tell anyone about the loops! Because I was too much of a coward to say anything! Because I was too much of a coward to tell you how I feel! Especially you, Sif. I'm too much of a coward to tell you how I feel about you. And I'll never get that chance. Because it's already too late. "..." [He's just staring at you with a scared expression. Or at least its probably scared. Whatever. It's too late anyway. You coward.]
"...So what is it? Can I help?" "Nope! Was that all?"
[Sif seems... sad, at your response.]
"Alright. I'll miss you Isa. Come visit me sometime on your travels, okay? It'd be a shame if I couldn't look at the stars another time with you."
Roleswap Sus event combos Everybody gets a turn being the suspect and the suspectee! Nobody enjoys the experience, though.
#isat role!swap au#researcher sif and traveler isa have very 'doomed yaori' vibes#i love them both so very much#they are so very vibes#sorry if any of this doesnt correlate well with the au i just needed to do it cuz they're both so ooouggghhh#/pos#popsie writes
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Part 3 to surprise you’re a dad plz 🥺
Title: surpsie you're a dad 3
Fandom: Tokyo revengers
Characters: Haitani brothers
Fic type: fluff
Pairings: Rindō x male reader
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, omegaverse, pregnancy, birth, angst, fluff, good uncle ran
Notes: short chapter low brain energy
Summary: birth and hard conversations
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
"Six weeks?"
"At minimum" the doctor said simply "and he isn't to lift anything heavier than his pup" Rindō and Ran nodded, glancing at a fast asleep (name) who just finished feeding the tiny baby that was (daughters name), said baby was tucked in Rans arms as Rindō was terrified of holding her.
It had been three hours and Rindō could barely look at his child or his mate, he was terrified.
He didn't know what to do in this situation.
He didn't know how to be a dad!
And Ran was somehow a way better parent figure to his kid and he was an uncle!
Ran watched his brother, he could see the things going on in his head and the stress he was under "you know you got this, right?" Ran said honestly, big brother mode activating while looking at his terrified baby brother, seeing the young boy who he always made sure had a meal on his plate. "Look at her" Ran said simply, gazing at the tiny bundle "this kid is a Haitani, she is one of us and as you're dad it's your duty to be better than ours could ever be" his voice serious while he gently put Rindōs daughter in his arms "she's so small..." Rindō choked out, holding her close and sitting in a chair "she is, even if you and (name) don't work, she will always be a consistent and by proxy so will he"
"Yeah..."
"Serious question, Rinny" Rans voice was methodical while gently tracing the wisps of hair from his nieces head "do you want it to work with (name)?" He asked so calm and collected while Rindō sighed "I fucked up enough" he grumbled out and Ran snorted "you sure did, you called him a whore in so many new fun ways! It's going to take a lot to earn his trust"
"I don't think he will, how would I even get him to do that?"
"Maybe start with an apology"
"An apology?" Rindō was incredulous and Rindō rolled his eyes and leaned into his chair "we are hardened criminals, we do what we want but he is the mother to your child, he is your mate" Ran said seriously "our world means nothing compared to family, an apology can fix a lot of things and open many doors" ran said before leaning close and locking eyes with his younger brother before whispering;
"So apologize"
And with that, Ran stood up and pulled his cigarette holder "I'm leaving now, you better make sure he isn't being stupid or I swear to god"
And with that, Rindō was left in the room with his sleeping mate who hated him and his infant daughter who gurgled up at him, wide eyed "hey..." He whispered and gently took the babies finger "I'm your dad..." He whispered to the little girl who looked at him with nothing but pure curiousity and Rindō couldn't help but smile at this pup.... His pup.
He was a dad now.
Looking up he stared at (name), the Omega spent and out cold in the comfortable bed with many pillows ran made sure (name) had.
Ran was right, he was so obsessed with (name) when he met him at that party... He was absolutely stunning...
Would (name) forgive him?
He was awful to him even up to the birth...
(Name) Held onto his son while being discharged, Ran returning with a BMW armored van and a shit eating grin "there's my beautiful neice~" ran cooed while he and Rindō helped (name) get situated, (name) glaring at Rindō while the Alpha buckled in (daughters name) into her car seat "I got you two some food! Also I stocked up your fridge, (name)!" Ran always the doting but brother knew Rindō still hadn't apologized but could see him working up the confidence for it.
"We'll be alternating whose with you, we worked out a schedule so you're never alone!" Ran said happily and (name) suppressed a sigh at the concept of having to be near his daughters sire for prolonged periods of time and hopefully not kill the Kanto manji member.
(Name) Ate his food quietly, exhausted "drive slower" (name) hissed out and Ran looked back from the rearview mirror "were going at the speed limit (name)"
"Don't care." (Name)s instincts were going haywire "drive. Slower." He hissed out and ran began driving slower at the furious pharamones that made Rindō crack a window "thank you" (name) focused his attention to (daughters name) who was so peaceful before pulling out his phone and placing the screen under her nose to check her breathing and let out a content sigh.
"Rindō is on first watch as I have business to attend to but don't worry I'll bring you two souvenirs!"
(Name) Glared at Rindō and Rindō looked anywhere but him "you know you don't have to, I know you're not thrilled about parenting" (name) didn't even ask for this...
"I want to be there for you two"
"Why...?" (Name) Was suspicious of the alphas words, he didn't trust him as far as he could throw him.
"...let's get (daughters name) in bed then let's talk"
#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo revengers x male reader#tokyo revengers fluff#male reader#omegaverse#bonten x reader#omega male reader#x male reader#anime x male reader#anime x reader#rindou x male reader#haitani rindou x reader
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I feel like we’ve collectively moved on too fast from ‘Are you Sure’?!. Maybe we’re too overwhelmed?
Just wondered what your favourite part was? What shocked you? And what you would have changed ?
Jikookers have always had a tendency to move on from absolutely everything at tremedous speed which baffles me. There are still moments from years ago that still shock me to this day. I think it's because we've always been spoiled rotten by jikook 😂
I'm actually glad to get your ask.
A favorite part is soooo hard to choose, but I think what I liked the most was seeing their general happiness in Sapporo. They were SO happy and SO excited and played in the snow like children, it was quite beautiful to see. It's the trip that meant the most to them and it showed. But I also liked the chaos of Connecticut 😂
I was shocked many times. First with this:
THIS MOMENT.
I was gobsmacked. A slap in my face. Because this statement right there is irrevocably romantic. You can't spin it any other way. There is no blurred lines. There is no alternative. There is no other reason his heart is fluttering. Jungkook right there confessed to the world he is in love with Jimin. AND PEOLPLE DISMISS IT LIKE IT NEVER HAPPENED. I'm????? People really see what they want to see. There, he said it. He said Jimin simply holding his shirt is evoking romantic feelings in him. He is attracted to Jimin. And he said it in a very calm collected tone like this is another tuesday. Like this is a known, accepted, normal fact that would not surprise Jimin. He's just informing him. But this is not shocking news. IT TELLS EVERYTHING WE NEED TO KNOW.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk but moving on:
This whole segment was very shocking to me, not because they were particularly close (they are a couple so it's expected) but I was shocked to see they did this in front of a whole group of staff sitting in front of them who would be wondering what the f is happening. To show this level of closeness to a bunch of people you need to have such a high level of trust in each other and in the relationship. They are comfortable enough to show physical closeness and not be bothered one bit with anyone watching them which in itself is very disconcerting because that is not usually the case even in normal people long-term relationships, at least not to this level
The simple "This is see-through" phrase from Jungkook to a Jimin with a devilish smile ready to do mischief was very shocking to me. What was he about to do that deserved this warning? The only explanation would be that Jimin was about to get too close to him physically in the pool. But why would he do this as friends? Friends playing around would not have warranted such a warning. Because no one would have even thought about anything in particular.
But JK needed to warn him anyway. Only reason? If they are a couple and Jimin was about to get *CLOSE* like couples do in the pool. Which he was about to do looking at his devious smile. He was about to do something at least. Something that could not pass as friendship otherwise Jungkook would have said nothing. Much to think about.
He blurted it. Like it just came out so naturally. Jungkook has no chill whatsoever. This man is flirting blatantly in front of the entire world. While Tae was there. How could beautiful clouds even compare to Jimin. Jungkook only sees Jimin and he doesn't care for anyone to know about it. It's just what it is. Jimin or nothing. Everybody else can go home. Thank you Jungkook.
Of course one of the most shocking:
I already made a quick post about it but this was...this was....I have no words to this day. Can you believe we saw this? THE LEVEL OF INTIMACY. THE QUIETNESS OF THE MOMENT. THE KNOWING.
They knew. We knew. No one said a word. We were all intruding. I was frozen and holding my breath, my mouth wide open with shock and my heart was beating in my chest and I had to pause afterwards because this was jawdropping.
And I've seen many people that did not get it. But with everything we know about jikook thus far, everything they have been through, the growth, the ever expanding love, this moment was incredibly special and in a way quite emotional to witness.
This is their normalcy. Sharing a bed and intimacy and physical and emotional closeness.
AND THEY LET US SEE IT? CAN YOU BELIEVE? THIS IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE!
If you told me in 2018 we would witness this, I would not have believed you. This is beyond my wildest imagination. This is not even about the fucking butt-slap. It's the whole mood of the scene. It's the tenderness. I was on the floor.
I think this is the most shocking thing I've seen as a jikooker including MMA 2018.
This was shocking. Not the act itself. The shock was in the hesitancy of Jungkook. Of Jungkook allowing himself to share this tender moment with Jimin in a train full of people in Japan (of all places, where people don't show intimacy in public) but this moment was too important for Jungkook to pass it up and he almost didn't do it but then he thought fuck it and let himself go completely. What a beautiful and meaningful moment. How special and precious 💜😭
This was a really insane moment too. Jikook being tangled together god knows how in this car and Jungkook looking drunk on love showing off Jimin like a proud and posessive boyfriend. Just wow. I certainly didn't expect this but I can't say I'm not happy 🙊 They couldn't look more like a couple here
I'll finish with this picture that really shook me. Jimin's name on JK's chest. I don't know what else to say. If people wanted them to spell it out, well this is spelled out, literally. It's all here.
There were so many great moments and I feel we could talk about it for hours but I'm gonna wrap it up.
My last answer is probably gonna pin me as a hater but honestly I don't really care I know where I stand. What I would have changed to AYS would have been Tae not coming to Jeju. Look, I love Tae, I have no issues with Tae, and jikook were fine with it so this was fine, but I felt sometimes uncomfortable because I felt his presence was a bit misplaced, and you could feel it in jikook's behaviour too, so Jeju had a bit of an uneasy feeling to it. I think Tae didn't add anything more to the show. I would love to see more of Tae in any other setting, I love him in group settings in general, but I simply felt it was a bit of a wrong place wrong time situation. But I still enjoyed Jeju a lot it was just not my favorite.
Otherwise there would be nothing I would have changed to AYS. (Maybe Jimin not suffering this much? 😂)
Anyway thanks for your ask I had fun and take care anon 💜
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It’s always Price getting the under desk support but what about ME
Cw: f.receiving oral, hidden sex, public sex, price being needy, husband!price
Something something about John married to an office worker who whenever he's home always pops by on her lunch break with something. Coffee, sweets, something from that sandwich place you love down the street. But you keep on getting in shit because he’s not supposed to be in your office because of “confidential files” or whatnot.
John already has limited time with you and he isn’t meeting you in the lobby, no.
So he just sneaks back into your office. Looking gruff yet confident enough that most just think he’s a maintenance worker. Shushing you when he comes into your office and shuts the door.
“Just missed ya bird,” he hums, mouth already slotting over yours, tasting like tobacco and the coffee he brought you both. Yours obnoxiously flavoured with enough things to get him tongue-tied when he was ordering it.
He’s all over you for the first week or so that he’s back. Waking you up with his mouth on your tits, half-hard cock rutting against your thigh. Groping you appreciatively while you do some supper or laundry, murmuring bout how much he loves you.
This is no exception.
He’s worming his tongue into your mouth, hands pawing at your ass through that pretty skirt jesus he really should just find a way to hire you on base as his little secretary so he can have you whenever he wants-
The knock on your door has you choking on his saliva, eyes wide as you think of where to hide a 6-foot big ass man in your cramped office.
‘You busy?’ has you shoving him haphazardly under your desk. Calling back out and letting your new, young coworker come into your office. She’s always talking and coming to you for every little thing which normally you don’t mind but you know she wouldn’t keep quiet about seeing your husband back here.
John’s big body bent in ways he really doesn’t appreciate until you clamour back into your chair and slide back in front of your computer. Legs spread to accommodate the man under your desk. And of course, your skirt is giving him the perfect view up to your clothed pussy.
Burying his face between your legs, skirt pushing up from his head and when you try to clamp down he’s still trying to move forward. A man on a mission, beard scratching along your thighs too noisily and making you finally relent.
Fat tongue tonguing along your folds through your underwear. Spit soaking the fabric as he tries to tonguefuck you through it. Trying to taste you through it.
And you just have to sit there and keep quiet, listening to your coworker yammer on and on about what you can’t quite tell but shes is happy with you just responding with nods and placating ‘oh yeah’s n ‘definitely’ that eventually tapper out because John is working just right and his nose is pressed right into your clit and if you just sit back a little you’re sure he’ll be able to just get right where you need him-
“Oh did your husband come by?”
You just about bolt out of your skin when she mentions him, eyes snapping to the coffees he’d left on the desk.
“Umm yeah, got me a little something for lunch…”
“You’re on your lunch and you let me keep talking? Jeez, I'm so sorry, you should’ve told me to shut ages ago.” She jokes and you can feel John grin.
By the time the door shuts, you’re already kicking away from the desk to look at this man and all his audacity.
Chin shining with his spit and your wetness, kneeling under your desk like a dog yet looking more than content to be under there. Has you wondering if this was your penance for all those times you warmed his cock in your mouth during all those endless meetings and video calls.
“Come ‘ere, you only got 10 minutes left.”
Johns already dragging you back, hands bunching up your skirt. Already deciding you’re going to come at least once before he’s gone. Maybe more if he can convince you to let him stay past your break.
You don’t even have to do anything! Just sit there nice and pretty and tapping away on your computer and let the old dog entertain himself.
#make him grind against your leg while he’s at it#WHO SAID THAT?!#141#cod mw2#john price#captain price#price x reader#price cod
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First things first, I'll start the day with a meticulous cleaning routine. You see, a good toy is not only visually appealing but also hygienic and well-maintained. I've scrubbed every inch of my body, ensuring that I'm squeaky clean and smelling of sweet vanilla. After all, who doesn't love the scent of freshly baked cookies wafting from a submissive little slut? With my skin feeling silky smooth and my mind racing with anticipation, I've lubricated my tight holes, making sure they're ready to be filled with whatever my Master desires.
Now, let's talk about the attire. I've chosen a stunning black latex catsuit that hugs my curves like a second skin. It's tight enough to make every inch of me look irresistible, yet flexible enough to allow for the full range of motion that comes with being a sex toy. The shine from the latex is absolutely mesmerizing, reflecting the soft glow of the room, making me feel like a living, breathing piece of art. The sound of it squelching against my skin as I move sends a thrill through my body, a reminder of the erotic playtime that awaits.
My day begins with a series of stretches to ensure my body is as limber as possible. After all, I want to be able to contort into whatever position my future owner finds most pleasurable. As I stretch, my muscles protest, but I know it's all for the greater good. With every bend and twist, I imagine the delight that will be etched on their face when they see how easily I can fold in half or spread my legs wider than should be humanly possible.
Speaking of spreading, I've also decided to spend some quality time with my favorite butt plug. It's a big one, gleaming black. I lube it up with a generous dollop of lube, savoring the coldness as I spread it around the tip. I take a deep breath and slowly push it in, feeling it stretch me wide and fill me up. The sensation is oddly comforting, a constant reminder of what I'm here for.
As the day progresses, I'll be experimenting with different sensations. Perhaps I'll wear a pair of nipple clamps while I run errands, the constant tug keeping my nips hard and sensitive. Or maybe I'll slip a vibrator into my cunt while a coffee shop, my cheeks flushing as it hums away, bringing me closer and closer to the edge without allowing me to tip over. After all, a good toy knows how to keep itself on edge, always eager for more.
For lunch, I'll treat myself to a light meal of finger foods, something I can eat without the need for cutlery. It's all about getting used to serving myself up in bite-sized pieces for when I'm presented to my Master.
Throughout the afternoon, I'll be practicing my oral skills. I've got a dildogag that's just the right size and shape for the job, gagging and drooling like the good little slut I am. The sight of me on all fours, mouth stretched wide around a cock, is something I know will drive you wild. I'll spend hours getting used to the feel of it, the way it hits the back of my throat, making me gag and sputter.
As the sun sets, I'll slip into something a bit more… revealing. Perhaps a latex dress that barely covers my ass, or a skimpy little set that leaves nothing to the imagination. I'll wander around my apartment. After all, a good toy is always available for use, no matter where it is. I leave my door unlocked, just in case my Master decides to drop by unannounced. The thrill of not knowing if I'll be caught in such a compromising position makes my heart race and my cunt throb.
And let's not forget the finishing touches. I'll paint my face with a mask of obedience, my eyes lined with smoky black liner that makes them look like the windows to my soul—a soul that craves nothing more than to be used and abused. My lips will be a glossy red, pouty and wet, begging to be kissed or bitten. My hair will be pulled back into a tight bun, exposing my neck for whatever use my Master sees fit.
But the pièce de résistance? The collar. A shiny, chrome collar that says, without a single word, "I belong to you." It'll sit snugly around my neck, a constant reminder of my place. I'll attach a leash and lead, ready to be walked like the obedient pet I long to be.
As the night wears on, I'll keep myself entertained with a little bit of solo play. I'll tease and tantalize my clit with a vibrator, bringing myself to the brink of orgasm again and again without ever allowing myself to come. This is a crucial part of my training, learning to deny myself pleasure until it's given. By the time my Master arrives, I'll be a writhing, whimpering mess of need.
But what really makes today special is the promise of tomorrow. Each and every day is a chance to become more of the toy I was meant to be. Whether it's trying new outfits, learning new tricks, or pushing my body to its limits, I'll be eagerly awaiting the moment I'm picked up and played with.
So, today I'm becoming a better plaything. Submissive, eager, and ready for whatever comes my way. And when tomorrow rolls around, I'll wake up and do it all again. Because that's what good toys do. They crave the attention, the use, and the pleasure of serving and as the days go by, I'll only get better at it. More empty. More sexy. More slutty. More… me.
What are you doing today to be a better toy?
Could be anything, really. You might have decided that today you'll crawl around on all fours when you're in private, so that you can more easily feel like the submissive little pet you want to be. Maybe you've made up your mind to lift up your top and expose your tits when you're working at your desk, or spend the day bottomless, all to feel more exposed and slutty. Hell, you could even have resolved to spend a few minutes every hour pressing a toy into yourself, because you want to get more used to and eager for that feeling of being stuffed full.
Every single day is an opportunity to make yourself emptier, happier, and closer to the kind of plaything you want to be.
So, once again:
What are you doing today to be a better toy?
Share your methods down in the replies or reblogs! I'm sure that other bimbos, pets, and dolls would appreciate the new ideas.
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The Sacrifice - Part 11 - The End
"How are they, Tess?"
"I've treated Roman's injuries and he's resting now. I've also given him antibiotics and painkillers, so he should be comfortable...as much as he can be, given the circumstances."
"As for Evelyn, I've done all I could for the moment, but we'll have to wait for the morning change before I can perform a full examination. Her wounds seem to be healing remarkably fast though."
"Is it because she's a werewolf?"
"Yes, although I do want to take a closer look at that bite, in case it's at risk of becoming infected. I admit I don't have any experience treating demon-inflicted wounds."
"They are prone to infection."
"I still can't wrap my head around the idea that anyone would do something like this! To their own child, no less!"
"It shocked me as well."
"You took such a risk in confronting her, Fiona! The inhabitants of the Hellplanes are not to be trifled with!"
"I'm aware of that, Dad. Would you rather I'd let Jacob and Evelyn go in there alone?"
"Of course not - what you did was very brave - but we can't help worrying. The whole thing could've gone so much worse."
"Well, it worked out fine, so you can let it go now."
It was Abby who brought the conversation back on track.
"Is Roman going to be all right?"
"Physically? Probably. He had a number of deep gashes that needed stitches, several broken bones including two ribs, a bruised lung, plus the...runes carved into his back, which will be uncomfortable for a while. Assuming there are no complications, these should heal in time."
"Mentally, it's a different matter. I'm not an expert, but I don't think the kind of trauma he's been through is something he'll be able to just shrug off. Speaking to therapist might help him."
"May we go in and see them?"
"You may, but just for a little while. Jacob is with Roman already; he hasn't left his bedside since I brought him back to the ward."
"Mr Stigfinnare is with his wife as well. He's been worried sick about her, prowling around the waiting room like a caged wolf."
"I'm surprised he didn't kick the door down."
"He might've done, if I hadn't let him in."
The trio - together with Ulf, who refused to be parted from Evelyn - gathered around Roman's bed.
Roman was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to sleep and forget, but he forced a smile on his face as he looked at each of the people who had risked their lives to save him.
In truth, he could hardly believe it.
"I don't know what to say. I owe you my life - no, more than my life. My soul. 'Thank you' doesn't seem like enough..."
"This is the second time I had to help save your ass, Turner! You'd better not make a habit out of it!"
Evelyn's cheerful tone helped defuse some of the tension, although Ulf kept his arm wrapped protectively around his wife. She was putting up a brave front, but he could tell she was hurting more than she was letting on. He hated it!
"It's over now."
"Maybe...maybe not."
"Fiona...? What do you mean?"
"The ritual circle carved into his back. The Nameless One may be have been banished, but those runes are magic. He's tied to the Hellplanes now."
"WHAT?!"
Roman sat up so fast that white stars burst before his eyes and his injuries flared painfully despite the medication keeping the worst of it at bay. He felt the cold panic rising like a tide.
"Are you saying it can come back?"
"Fuck. You're not, are you?"
"There are many doors between the planes, and things have a way of slipping through the cracks. That sigil is one such door; closed for the moment, but not locked."
"But you can remove it, right?! Or...render it inert, or something?"
"I...I'll do some research. Ask around."
Roman looked so crestfallen, Jacob's heart twinged in sympathy.
"Guys? Can you give us a moment, please?"
"Please try not to think about it, all right? If anything happens, my whole family are witches; they'll help. You need to focus on getting better."
Roman smiled humorlessly; it was hard not to think about the interdimensional door to Hell itself he carried around on his back, but he was so very tired. Sleep beckoned, demons or no demons.
But first, there was something he needed to say to Jacob.
"I have to admit, I didn't expect you to come to my rescue. Considering how things are between us..."
"Look, just because we broke up doesn't mean I don't still lo- care about you. Besides, I didn't actually do much, it was mostly Evelyn and Fiona."
"Still. Facing down demons and witches when you're just a regular person with no special powers took guts."
"I did have an axe."
Something happened then that Roman did not expect: he burst into laughter. Which hurt, but it was worth it, and his heart felt lighter for it.
"I think I'd like to sleep now..."
"Yes, you should. I'll be back to see you in the morning."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
As Roman sank into the cottonwool depths of drug-induced sleep, a smile fluttered on his lips.
The End!
Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the story!
#sims 2#ts2#the sims 2#sims2#sims 2 story#sims 2 bacc#bacc: walden#story: the sacrifice#roman turner#jacob merridew#evelyn morgan#ulf stigfinnare#fiona merridew#abby shepard#tess orwell#julius merridew#imogen calhoun#olivia merridew#roman actually has a cast on his left arm which is hidden in every picture haha
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folio thots anon here 👋 back with more thots but about matt this time
enemies to not friends but something hotter? ambiguous relationship
you bump into a guy in a ghostface mask (matt) at a halloween party that you didn't even want to go to, but were dragged to by your best friend. she's ditched you and now this guy almost knocks you over, but he's apologetic.
“you scared me there” he says. you rebuttal that you didn't but he stands his ground. “no you look pretty scary. i'm terrified of hot women in a scary masks and fishnets.” and while you're definitely not dressed scary aside from a purge mask you borrowed from your roommate, you are dressed somewhat sexy in a black skirt and fishnets and now know this guy was checking you out.
a little back and forth flirting leads you back inside the house and any thoughts about ditching you had prior to this are gone.
he never takes the mask off and you don't either, but you start making jokes about not wanting ghostface to kill you which leads into a playful chase around the party.
before you know it you're alone in a room with him, your heart racing and thighs squeezing together because fuck you're actually turned on by this and fuck it, you do have a mask kink.
you don't even try to stop him when he approaches you, your hands already reaching out for him and undoing his belt before you fall to your knees and lift your mask up just enough to expose your mouth and take him.
only once he's hard and wet enough do you pop him free and stand back up for him to push you against the wall and take you, ripping your fishnets in the process.
it shouldn't be as hot as it is being fucked by someone you don't know, but holy shit why does that just make it even better to you.
and god he sounds so mean, calling you all sorts of degrading names; slut, whore, cockslut, even him calling you a good girl makes you clench and moan around him as he drives himself into you without mercy.
“you like being fucked by some guy you don't know, huh? you like being a slut for my cock?” you're practically delirious as he says these things, and all you can answer with is yes, over and over until he finally pushes you over the edge.
when you finally come down from your high is when you see it, the lord of the rings shirt. you don't need to take the mask off to know who it is beneath, but you reach out and do so anyway. the smug look on his face makes you remove your own, ready to chew him out but he hits you with the: “i thought you knew it was me.”
you didn't, or at least you think you didn't. in reality you'd know his voice anywhere, especially with the way it was growling in your ear, calling you the most degrading things imaginable. it's not that you hate matt, you just think he's an ass and yes, you've fantasied about hate fucking him but for it to actually happen is a whole different thing.
“if you tell anyone.” you threaten, but he's not scared of you, he's always snarking back and maybe that's why he gets under your skin so much. “who am i going to tell?”
I absolutely LOVE enemies to lovers and hate fucking with Matt, that is my trope!!!!
You nailed this, because he WOULD be so mean to you, and calling you names and insulting you. And the fact that he knew it was you, but you didn't know it was him, but he got you all hot and bothered anyway??
He would be so smug about it, and teasing you all the time about how you were so pliant and begging him to fuck you.
#matt dierkes#matt dierkes fanfiction#matt dierkes fluff#matt dierkes smut#matt dierkes one shot#matt dierkes headcannon#matt dierkes fic#matt dierkes x reader#matt dierkes blurb#bad omens#bad omens imagine#bad omens fanfiction#bad omens smut#bad omens fluff#bad omens fic#bad omens one shot#bad omens headcanons#ask
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Pt 4
"Papa, I wanna go see animals again..." Charlie told him, poking around at the smiley face on her omelet. Lucifer paused from sipping his herbal tea, to look at her in excitement; sure, they'd just gone last weekend, but Lucifer was more than ready to go back to the aquarium again. More than ready to see someone again.
"Sure, sweetie, we can go to the aquarium." Lucifer beamed at her, holding up an orange slice off his plate to make a fake smile in front of his face. Charlie giggled, but she was already getting to that age where she was laughing because he was being silly, not because she found it actually funny.
"No, I want to go to the zoo!" Charlie said with a big grin, unaware that she made Lucifer's heart plunge slightly.
"Oh. Yeah, uh, of course! That'll be fun too." Lucifer answered, faking his enthusiasm. Maybe he shouldn't be this hard up for a guy he'd barely spoken to, especially since the man's job was to interact with aquarium goers. But, he felt like they had... you know, a little spark.
The local zoo was bigger than the aquarium, they lived in a big city, and it got a lot of traffic. Not a ton at 2pm on a Tuesday during the school year, but enough other people were around that they didn't feel alone. They wove through the zoo, until they reached an amphitheatre in the kid's area. It looked like a show was about to start, and Lucifer was getting tired after so much walking and pulling the wagon along with him.
"Hey, Charlie, let's watch the show! That'll be fun, won't it? They'll probably have animals come out!" Lucifer said, trying to encourage his daughter, who thought about it, before nodding and running down the steps at a speed that legitimately worried him that she could fall - then again, he'd seen Charlie jump on a trampoline, launch herself into the side of the house, then get back up laughing.
They found a seat up near the front with a few other parents and kids, including one peacefully sleeping baby in one woman's arms. Lucifer smiled at the infant, wistfully missing those days - just not the diaper duty.
Suddenly fog blasted out of the stage, and confetti cannons went off, promptly scaring the baby into a fit of screaming. Music began to play, and an announcers voice came flooding around them from large speakers.
"Hello, hello, hello and welcome to The Garden! We're going to introduce you to some totally awesome creatures, and some spooky ones too! So, I want every boy, girl, and squirrel, to pop on their adventurer hat and come with me on trip across the wild world!" A tall figure emerged from the fog, clearly wearing an Indiana Jones type hat. Charlie was slack jawed and mystified by what was going on, which was enough of a distraction that Lucifer didn't stop to think the man sounded familiar.
"My name is Captain Adam, and my partner here is Lieutenant Lute!"
Lucifer's head snapped back to the stage, stunned to see Adam, his Adam (his Adam?), walk out from the fog, and out onto the main stage. Their eyes met briefly, and Adam raised an amused eyebrow at him, but he clearly had other concerns - Adam had a full ass eagle on his arm. Then he noticed the pretty, yet very serious looking, girl walk out on stage beside Adam in khaki shorts and a bandana on her head. She was holding an owl, that was looking around curiously at the audience.
Charlie bounced in her seat, clearly recognizing Adam from the aquarium, and looking at Lucifer excitedly. "Look, look! Papa!"
"I see, sweetie." Lucifer said with a nervous laugh. God, Adam was going to think he was a stalker.
"For the beginning of our show, I'm going to need a volunteer from the audience." Adam said, a microphone clipped onto his khaki shirt. "How about you? The short blond man in the audience, who looks like he has a fondness for Clownfish. Come on up to the stage." Adam sent him a come hither motion, which did things to him emotionally.
Everyone turned to look at him, and Lucifer turned beet red.
What had he gotten himself into?
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so I was thinking if you could maybe write a Megan × fem reader where they're Roblox girlfriends and decided to meet up irl (idk I just think it would be so cute haha)
“Roblox?”
— ( 💻 ) "maybe we should meet irl lol" Megan chats , "why not?" you reply
— ( 🎧 ) online dating , fluff , swearing, LEWSERR , cuties , established relationship (girlfriends)
— ( 🎮 ) ackk I love this request!!, it fits Megan so well :)) love you anon!! , made this longer than I expected lololol
stranger danger is something you know and apply in your life — you can never really trust people online especially when you haven't seen how they look or know much about them
but that rule just gets broken whenever you play Roblox , the whole thing of Roblox is meeting and playing games with strangers online
sometimes you're lucky with who you meet but most times not — it was worth the risk for you , instead of getting bored
Mei_Berry05:hii ^^
y/nniee_06: helloo!!
"I love her avatar" you murmur to yourself as she approaches you — your avatar was... something! compared to hers
you were playing adopt me who cares what you wear— but she was cute the way she typed was very nice
Mei_Berry05: can we be friends??
y/nniee_06: yeah sure! ( ◜‿◝ )♡
and just like that you two became friends, over the span of a few weeks she would always match with you—join the games your playing and buy you robux whenever you wanted a gamepass
ding
she was honestly so cute , but you always wondered how she looked like or how she was in real life god knows she might just be a old man behind the screen
∞
a notification rings your cellphone, it was her!, "can we play mimic??" you read her chat — you weren't really that good in horror games but you'll be with her anyways it's okay
y/nniee_06: Sure!!! — I'll just set up my laptop :))
Mei_Berry05: okayy just join me when you're ready
"okay meii" you replied as if she was listening to you , you open your laptop blinded by the screen brightness
you join the game greeted by her jumping and emoting Infront of you , you giggle as you see her reaction
Mei_Berry05: hi!! ^_^
y/nniee_06: heyyoo! , lets play :]
Mei_Berry05: okay follow me
she chats jumping up and down in the game , the game was fun and very hard — you had to repeat the same level almost 7 times , megan practically carried you throughout the game , soon enough you felt very bored of the game the overuse of jumpscares just made you sick of it
Mei_Berry05: wanna play adopt me?
Mei_Berry05: please?? :((
you can practically see her frowning even in real life so you immediately agreed — plus as immature as it sounds you loved adopt me
y/nniee_06: okayy , join me! <3
you type enthusiastically on your laptop , the keyboard was beat up by the amount of times you typed this fast and hard
the game was fun you both scammed some kids , and bought the recent egg the ocean egg , hatched it and got a legendary octopus!
Mei_Berry05: soo can I ask you something?
y/nniee_06: yeahh? why what is it??
Mei_Berry05: can you be my g!rlfri3nd? :>
you were taken a back, maybe because you didn't expect it or more on because you two only knew each other online and it's not even on social media but on roblox
y/nniee_06: YESS!! , so can we? match fits?!?
you chat back smiling to yourself in real life — you wait as she types in chat
Mei_Berry05: YAYY (ノ≧∇≦)ノ , yes we could match fits!! ### sm
you laugh as her chat gets tagged , it was three letters so probably "ily" i love you , aww
"pulling a girl , but in roblox" you chuckle to yourself , the first relationship you had was built in roblox not only that but in adopt me
weeks and weeks pass by and not a single one ended without you two playing some random game on Roblox sometimes you both just chat about your day— you didn't know much about her other than she was in Hawaii and she loves dancing
∞
Mei_Berry05: I'm actually in LA rn!
y/nniee_06: oogofmdi I live in LA WDYMMM?? UR HERE?
your heart was about to jump out of your chest with how excited you were , were you gonna meet her finally?
Mei_Berry05: maybe we should meet irl!!
y/nniee_06: why not?
and just like that you two started planning where and when you two would meet it was nerve wracking to say the least — you were gonna see your girlfriend! , but you weren't sure if it was safe..
∞
"I'm so nervous what the fuck" you mutter to yourself as you wait for her , you both agreed to meet in the local café near you , you sat down and already ordered a croissant and a iced mocha
everytime someone new entered the cafe your heart raced , but then she walked in — she had this calming and soft aura to herself
"hi! — y/n!!!" she exclaims as you wave your hand at her , she runs up to you hugging you
"hi mei!" you replied back , she was so cute , the slight tint of pink to her cheeks and that cute smile gosh your actually gonna die
you two talk about life and other things laughing at the first time you two met , and how you two were girlfriends in roblox
∞
after a long day you two walk in the breezy night , with ice cream to both your hands , her fingers interlocked with you as if she's afraid you'll float away
"i love you , i really do" megan whispers loud enough for you to hear , "I never would've imagined how much I'll love you more when I met you"
"I love you too—promise me you'll visit me more often 'kay?" you replied as you felt all warm inside a contrast to the cold whether
as you stop in front of the city fountain you lean your head onto her shoulders, enjoying the quiet company she provided, the warmth she made you feel
you look at her , she looks at you her face scrunched up as she tries to analyze what you were thinking — a beat passes by and you meet her lips with yours , hers was sweet and soft it felt right it was right
she smiles into the kiss , and holds onto your nape prolonging it , "I love you" megan mutters your foreheads pressed against each other , "I love you too" you replied
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The Lies We Tell
Summary that tells you nothing: Sometimes everything you ever wanted has been right there, within reach, all along.
CW/TW: Angst, fluff, swearing, friends to lovers, jealousy, smut, fingering, PinV, pet names, friends with benefits, more to come as I actually get things written out.
Masterlist
Why Do Men?
Quinn pushed the food around on her plate, barely listening to the man across from her. He was attractive enough, seemed kind. But good God, he was boring. From the moment she walked in he droned on and on about him and what he did for work, how much money he made. His big flashy car he had. Right now she was really hoping that Noah had asked her to stay with him instead. In fact, she had been sure that he would. Instead, he had rushed out of that bathroom and she hadn't seen him since. Not even when she knocked on his door before she left.
Him telling her she had shitty taste in men still stung a bit. Mostly because it was true. And who was it that picked up the pieces after every failed date? Every brief relationship that failed after three months? Noah. Always there to pick up the pieces and put her back together again. She was willing to bet he already had a whole thing planned for when she got home tonight, too.
"You're one of those goth girls, right?"
Quinn snapped out of her head. What the fuck was this guy on about?
"Excuse me?"
"I'm asking because you look like one. Tattoos, dark hair. Dark clothes." He leaned forward. "Bet you're into some kinky shit, too."
Her stomach turned. What the fuck? Did he really just say that? It didn't matter so much that she wasn't goth. Though, she definitely had more gothic tendencies than not. The sexualization of goth girls, however, was too much. It was vile. It was disgusting. God. Noah had been right.
"Mmmm. This date is over." Sighing, frustrated, she got up, pulling out her wallet. "Here's my half."
"Oh, come on. Don't be like that. It's just a question."
"Be like what? Bored out of my mind because you can't shut the fuck up about how great you think you are? Or irritated because you seem to think that goth women exist for your pleasure?" She threw the money down on the table, laughing. "See you never."
Satisfied she walked away, pulling her phone out. Everything in her screamed at her to call Noah, not an Uber. Noah would be there faster. But she didn't want to hear his "I told you so" just yet. That might set her off even more and she was trying not to cause a scene.
The cool night air hit her skin as the app told her a driver was on her way. 15 minutes until her ride arrived. Cursing she pulled up the text thread with Noah, debating texting him that he had been right. Just then, however, her date appeared in front of her, angry.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? You're not even that pretty, anyway."
Quinn's stomach churned, her palms going sweaty as she glanced up and down the sidewalk. There were people. Lots of them. She should be safe, right? Fuck. What had Noah taught her? He had tried so hard to teach her how to defend herself. Now that the time may be here she couldn't remember a thing. Steeling herself for what may happen she lifted her chin, meeting the man's eyes.
"I said the date is over."
"You know, you should be grateful I even gave you the time of day. I make more money in a year than you ever will in your life."
She laughed. Genuinely deeply laughed. This guy wasn't going to attack her. His ego might be bruised, but that's as far as it would go. The type of guy that used his wealth to get sex. If he even actually made that much money.
"Says the grown ass man crying because the girl that 'isn't even that pretty.' Do you even hear yourself right now?"
"Whatever. Good luck finding a man that'll put up with you."
She watched as he walked off, ignoring the tiny crack in her armor that last comment had made. So many failed dates. Nothing lasting more than three months in the last seven years. Maybe he was right and there was something just inherently wrong with her. Her track record definitely spoke to that.
Her phone lit up, letting her know her ride had arrived just as a vehicle with an Uber sign in the window showed up. Thank fucking God. All she wanted right now was her pajamas, a movie, and her best friend.
Tags: @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard
#bad omens cult#noah sebastian#noah sebastian fanfiction#bad omens fanfiction#noah sebastian smut#angst#noah sebastian angst#noah sebastian fic#fluff#noah sebastian fluff#what am i even doing#friends to lovers#bestfriend!noah#roommate!noah
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