#who broke mcs heart?
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*the time they dated other people* MC
MC *sniffling*
Sebastian *frowning, worried and trying to comfort her*: It's ok, MC. His lose.
Ominis *silently planning an murder accident*
#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy mc#sebastian sallow#ominis gaunt#sebastian sallow x mc x ominis gaunt#who broke mcs heart?#uhh the cute boy in the astronomy tower#what was his name#andrew larson#in this instance seb is more focused on making her feel better#while ominis carries the violent tendencies#no one makes mc cry
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Thinking about how this part only applies to Spencer and A because the other ROs had loving relationships before MC.
Well, it's a little more complicated than that, but... still.
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Actually no that's not true I had a great idea for a twst fic I can't believe I forgot it
#sophie speaks#it would be basically mc finishes the game and goes home but then oh no theyve been taken#and this weird lady is like “you broke the balance of worlds by helping your friends go kill them” and you're like “the fuck”#and then you wake up in the kingdom of hearts with a queen of hearts who has successfully beheaded alice and taken over wonderland#and none of the characters remember you so you have to slowly get them to remember and also somehow get home without actually killing all-#the house wardens. and the plot goes from there#and of course theyre all in love with you i am a one trick pony
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I've got this doubt that I can't shake off: if MC's pregnancy, for some reason, is a very tough and risky one (both might die or something), which one of the guys would have the saddest breakdown at some point (just ugly crying into MC's arms after months of keeping it together for her sake) and which would have the angriest (trashing entire offices, taking their anger out on their enemies or both)?
(I had intended to respond earlier, but man…that trailer…) Gosh, you guys know how to prod at that special part of my brain with these asks lately… 🥺 I may or may not have...started writing...little...snippets, really... 😔
Zayne would go into “doctor-mode.” He is going to utilize his medical knowledge and resources to give you the best care possible for both you and the baby, and while it seems you have nothing to worry about, you will feel the emotional-withdrawal from him as everything will feel so methodical and clinical and he forgets completely his role as a husband until you break down crying.
You had tried to keep your emotions in check these last few months, rationalizing that Zayne was never an expressive person, but his feelings and actions were always sincere. He was pacing across the bedroom reviewing with you about your recent prenatal checkup and what it meant for both you and this baby. It had been like this for several months now, and with your weak heart and the risk it posed for both you and the baby, Zayne had been extra attentive about your prenatal care.
As you sat on your bed, heavy with his child and close to your due date, listening to him rattle off different medical terms and speaking to you less as a wife but more as if you were his patient, you could feel your emotions peaking. You couldn’t remember the last time he was affectionate with you or actually asked how you were personally feeling throughout this whole pregnancy. He was by your side more, but you had never felt as lonesome as now, needing him back as your husband and not a doctor. You could feel the tears brimming, but it was getting harder each day to suppress your feelings.
Everything Zayne was saying sounded like muffled gibberish to you. You could barely focus on the present, barely acknowledging even the faint movements of the baby you were carrying, feeling more lost in your loneliness. You finally let your emotions and hormones collide and broke down crying in front of him, startling him immediately. Within seconds, he was on his knees before you, grasping your arms as he asked worriedly, “What’s wrong? Are you hurting somewhere?”
It took you a minute to gather yourself before you felt calm enough to speak, finally revealing to him how you hated who he had become during this time. At first, Zayne looked shocked, not quite comprehending what you had just said to him, but the more he pondered your hurt words, the more he realized there was a lot of truth in what you had said.
He kissed your belly, surprising you. Then, he got up and sat down next to you on the bed, pulling you into his embrace as he kissed your forehead, his apologies immediate and sincere.
“I didn’t mean to,” he said, holding you a little tighter, “I just…don’t want anything to happen to you. Either of you.”
You leaned into his embrace, and sighed softly, “I know…I’m not mad at you. I’m just…”
Zayne looked down, noticing how your words gradually stopped and you were withdrawing again. He lifted your chin, making you look at him as he coaxed you gently, “Just what?”
“I just miss you,” you said, voice breaking again and fresh tears brimmed your eyes. As he brushed your tears away, you cried harder, “And I’m scared…and I can’t stop thinking about all of the things that could go wrong…and then I realize stressing over this is also hurting the baby and…and…”
Zayne looked guilty as he realized that while he was too focused on your physical health, he had neglected your mental and emotional state, realizing how you had been suppressing your feelings for his sake.
He sat back against the headboard and pulled you back to rest against him. He apologized again for his neglect, and for the rest of that night, he listened and comforted you through your anxieties. There was that familiar warmth in his embrace that you missed, and the softness in his eyes returned as he listened to you earnestly. While your anxieties were still there, they seemed more manageable now that you realized the man by your side in this moment was not Doctor Zayne but your Zaynie, your beloved husband.
Rafayel is angry and emotional and will lash out and say things he doesn’t mean, such as he would rather lose the baby than you.
It had been like walking on eggshells these past few months. You had tried to keep your spirits up in spite of the situation, but eventually everything that had been quieted was going to surface, reaching an ugly peak.
You just had never expected him to say such words to you.
“You…don’t want…the baby?” You felt like you were choking as you uttered those words back to Rafayel.
He looked conflicted, his face twisted in pain and frustration. “I…I didn’t mean it,” he finally said, seeming to struggling with not just his words, but also his feelings.
You glared at him with tears in your eyes. “You said it! What could you have possibly meant to say if not that!”
“I don’t want to lose you!” he finally yelled back, frustrated that his words were being used against him by you of all people.
A strained silence filled the space, creating a rift between the two of you as you stared at one another in shock. In the distant, there was the cries of seagulls flying outside the studio, the sound of waves crashing on the shore a peculiar reminder that time was still moving forward even as you two stood frozen, locked in this seemingly unbreakable tension.
After several beats, Rafayel dropped to his knees, his head buried into his hands as he apologized, though it seemed more like he was apologizing for hurting you and not because of what he had said.
You walked closer to him, surprised when his arms wrapped around your waist, and his face pressed against your rounded stomach.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized again. He didn’t look up at you, but his words were heard clear: “I just can’t lose you again.”
You stared down at his head of hair, unsure of what you could say in this moment. He looked so broken and helpless, and while you understood his sentiments, it still did nothing to alleviate the hurt you felt at his earlier words. Shakily, you let your hand rest on the back of his head, as you said softly, “My fishie…I won’t leave you…”
You said that to comfort him, but even you had doubts about whether you could hold true to your words. It was so bright and sunny outside in Linkon today, so why did your future look so gray and uncertain? This was to be a joyous time in both of your lives, but even as you both felt the baby kicked and moved, that cloud of doubt remained.
Xavier is stunned and feels helpless.
It had been an awkward couple of weeks. Xavier was quieter than usual, but he still answered you whenever you spoke. You didn’t think he was upset at you, but you also couldn’t ignore the sudden distance between the two of you.
“Captain Jenna had put me on desk duty for the remainder of my pregnancy,” you told him over dinner one night.
He didn’t answer you, appearing distracted as he was grilling some beef slices on an electric griddle.
“Xavier?”
“Huh?” He looked up, surprised. “Oh, sorry, I had something on my mind. What did you say?”
“I…I said Captain Jenna is putting me on desk duty,” you repeated hesitantly.
“That’s good,” he answered and picked a slice of beef off the griddle to place in your bowl. “You should have some more meat for protein.”
“…thank you,” you said, noticing the way his eyes kept averting with yours. You placed your bowl on the table, upset now. “Xavier, did I do something wrong?”
He looked taken aback by the sudden question. He immediately shook his head. “Wrong? Why would you even think that?”
You frowned. “You’ve barely spoken with me lately,” you said, “It’s been nothing but ‘yeah,’ ‘okay,’ ‘alright’ from you lately.”
“I’m sorry,” he looked at you with remorse etched on his face. He sighed as he turned the griddle off before he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. “I…I just have something on my mind.”
“You keep saying that,” you retorted, mildly irked now, “What could be on your mind that is more important than being here with me?”
“You.”
Your irritation disappeared in that moment, his solemn gaze resting on you. Slowly, you found your voice, your words stuttering a little in confusion, “Wha…what do…you mean?”
“You and the baby,” he clarified. “Ever since the doctor said this was a high-risk pregnancy, I just…can’t stop thinking about…everything that could go wrong.”
“Xavier…”
“I don’t know how to make this easier for you,” he continued, suddenly unable to hide his anxiety any longer, “And even if we do everything right, what if things go wrong at the last minute? What if—no, just…no…”
You gasped when he suddenly came to you, his arms wrapped around you immediately in a tight embrace. He kissed the top of your head and apologized again, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset.”
“Xavier…it will be alright,” you reassured him.
He was silent.
“We’ll both be alright,” you continued.
“Right…” he answered, but you noticed he still didn’t want to let you go. You also didn’t want him to part, so you both remained in this moment a while longer.
Sylus has all of the money and connections in the world. He is going to ensure that both you and the baby will be alright throughout the pregnancy until birth. On the surface, he seems calm and confident, but to keener eyes, such as yours, you will pick up on his anxiety through little tics or behavioral changes.
The moment you had told Sylus you were pregnant with his baby, he lavished you with even more luxuries than before. You received the best care possible, especially when it came to light that this pregnancy was not going to be easy for you and there was concern about the health of the baby. Sylus made sure the most qualified doctors were monitoring you and he had ordered the personal chefs to prepare only nutritional dishes for you and the baby.
He was adamant that you received only the best of the best, and to strangers, Sylus appeared to be so level-headed and grounded, not a trace of worry could be seen on his face.
You, however, noticed how he seemed to drum his fingers on hard surfaces more often. He would also pull out his coin to flip at the most peculiar time, and his visits to the boxing ring also seemed to have increased. There were so many odd tics that you couldn’t ignore, but you suspected you knew the reason why.
One evening, you slipped into bed earlier while Sylus was still sleeping. It would almost be time for him to wake up from his slumber, so you waited. When you noticed the fluttering of his eyes, you leaned in closer, smiling as your face was the first thing he saw once he awoken.
“Good morning,” you greeted him with a mischievous smile, leaning down to peck his lips.
“Mm…morning,” he answered back in amusement, still a little groggy and bleary-eyed. He yawned. “What did I do to deserve seeing such a sweet sight first thing after waking up?”
“I wanted to talk.”
His mirth disappeared in that instance upon hearing your stern tone. He shifted in bed, sitting up with his back to the headboard. “Is something the matter?”
“You tell me.”
Sylus shook his head in confusion. “Sweetie, you are going to have to elaborate more,” he responded with a frown. “What are we talking about?”
“Are you…worried?”
“Worry?”
You rested a hand over your belly, his gaze instantly following your movement. “About the pregnancy,” you clarified.
“Of course I worry,” he answered back in that same even tone.
“You…seemed so assured, but lately, I’ve noticed these little…tics,” you explained, elaborating to him more in details as he listened patiently. When you finished, Sylus gently pulled you closer to him, letting your body rest against his. His arm wrapped around you, his hand resting on your belly to rub gentle little circles.
“I will always worry about you,” he said, “but panicking over things will not achieve anything, so I just redirected my worries elsewhere. Is that a problem?”
You shook your head and looked up at him. “No, I was just…wondering if you wanted to talk about them with me.”
He laughed and bent down to peck your lips. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
“What if I want to?”
He smiled in amusement and kissed you again. “Then who am I to argue with my pregnant wife?”
“What would you do?”
“Do what?”
“If…I don’t ma—”
“You will be fine,” he immediately cut you off, his demeanor shifting entirely. “You will both be fine.”
“But—”
He lay back down in bed, pulling you closer to him in a tighter embrace. ���Lull me to sleep,” he said instead.
“But isn’t it time for you to wake—” You clammed up when he shot you a pointed look. You could sense his unease, feeling his fingers digging into your flesh a little more. He was upset, deeply troubled, and you hated how he carried that burden alone on his shoulders.
“Alright,” you answered, snuggling into his embrace. You sang a song, a lullaby you had learned recently that you hoped to sing to your baby in a few months. As you sang, Sylus quietly hummed along, and it wasn’t long before you both fell asleep together, your worries left behind as you dreamed of the upcoming months when a new bundle of joy would arrive at Onychinus’ base.
Caleb is nervous, but he pours himself into taking care of you, because that is all he has ever known. He’s never liked seeing you ill or hurt, so he is going to do everything possible to make sure you receive the best care ever. He will do a lot of research and ask as many questions as he could to gain insight on what can be done to minimize the risk so both you and the baby will make through the pregnancy as safely as possible. He does not even want to consider the possibility of losing you.
You didn’t have any autonomy over yourself anymore. Whatever you wanted to do, Caleb did it for you first. Whatever you were craving, he would negate it half the time, citing it was better for you to eat a healthier alternative.
Even though you wanted to be mad at him, you knew he was doing this out of worry after the reveal that there were some concerns about this pregnancy. The moment that you had heard the word “risky,” everything afterwards suddenly sounded muffled as you were frozen in shock, a sudden anxiety creeping in as you stared down at your belly. Meanwhile, Caleb was already proactive, asking what needed to be done, what you both needed to be aware of, and so on and so forth. As if he could sense your worries, his hands immediately rested on your shoulders as he stood behind you while he continued to converse with the doctor.
He was your pillar and your protector. He always was, and he always will be.
Even if sometimes you found him to be overbearing.
You had missed many of his more indulgent dishes ever since he had put you on a clean-diet, and each time, you made a point of letting him know just how upset you were as you sulked when he finished setting the table with steamed fish and green veggies with bamboo shoots.
“It’s only temporary,” he reassured you, smiling to himself as he watched you picked at the fish half-heartedly.
“Most women get to enjoy their cravings while pregnant,” you said sullenly, taking a small bite of the fish.
He nodded in agreement as he sat down opposite of you. “If this was a normal pregnancy, then of course you should be able to indulge on your cravings—”
You looked at him hopefully.
“But your cholesterol level is higher than normal, and we also need to be cautious about the risk of developing gestational diabetes—”
You sulked again. “You are killing my appetite again.”
Caleb laughed softly as he set his chopsticks down. He cocked his head to the side, his chin resting in the palm of his hand as he leaned forward on the table. “What are you craving, pipsqueak?”
“What does it matter? You won’t let me have anything…” You bit into your bamboo shoot, not making eye contact with him.
“Pretend I will,” he answered in the same tone.
You shrugged. “…Pasta.”
“Pasta? Okay,” he answered thoughtfully, “What else?”
“Hmm…pizza…cheesecake…dumplings…”
Caleb covered his mouth to suppress his laughter as he watched you list each food longingly, practically lost in your own world and not even paying attention to him anymore. When it seemed you had finished listing, he questioned you again, “That’s all?”
You sighed and shook your head.
“What else is there? You’ve practically listed all of the food available on takeout menus,” he teased.
“…Braised chicken wings…”
Caleb looked surprised. “What?”
“Your braised chicken wings,” you clarified and looked up to meet his surprised gaze.
“Okay,” he said after a moment, “I’ll make some braised chicken wings tomorrow for dinner.”
You perked up. “R-really?” You eyed him suspiciously. “What about my clean diet?”
“In moderation would be fine,” he answered, smiling, “Besides, having the mother of my child miserable the whole time is also not good for the baby.”
You huffed at him, annoyed. “I’m miserable because of you.”
He blinked, not expecting you to suddenly be mad at him again. “I’m only—”
“I can’t enjoy the food I like, I’m tired all of the time, I can’t even see my feet anymore, my back hurts, my feet are swollen—how am I fat when I’m not even eating anything yummy?!”
“…are you having a mood swing?”
“Yes!” you cried out hysterically, nearly sobbing, “It’s your fault, too, I can’t control my hormones right now!”
Caleb laughed helplessly as he stood from his seat and crossed over to your side. Immediately, you wrapped your arms around his waist, your face buried against his stomach as you continued to cry and list your grievances with him.
“Alright, alright, it is my fault I gotten you pregnant,” he agreed. He peered down at the top of your head, smiling when you sniffled against his shirt while he rubbed the back of your head soothingly.
“…dummy…”
“Yes, yes, I’m a dummy,” he continued in a very pacifying tone.
“…A big dummy…”
“Mmhmm…”
“The biggest…”
“Right, right…”
You looked up, suspicious again when he continued to be very agreeable. You yelped in surprise when he immediately grabbed your face and leaned down to steal your lips with his. It took you a few seconds to register that he was kissing you before you gave in, feeling a warmth in your chest at his sudden display of affections.
“What else?” he asked softly when he pulled back a few centimeters, still close enough that his breath brushed against your trembling lips while his eyes locked with yours. You could feel his thumb brushing away the tears that were still on your cheeks.
“…you…”
“Me?”
“Uh huh…”
“What do you want from me?”
“Just you…”
He laughed and kissed your forehead. “Alright, pipsqueak,” he said, “You have me. I am all yours. Forever.”
You guided his hand down to your pregnant belly, smiling when that same look of surprise crossed his face again when he felt the baby kicked. Your smile widened as you answered him, “You’re ours.”
He knelt down on one knee, his large hand still resting over your belly as he smiled back before his eyes drifted down to your stomach. “Yeah,” he said, sighing almost as if in disbelief by this current life he was living, “Both of yours. Forever.”
#x — 💌#anonymous#love and deepspace#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace rafayel#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace caleb#love and deepspace x reader#zayne x reader#rafayel x reader#xavier x reader#sylus x reader#caleb x reader#lads scenarios#love and deepspace fanfiction#lnds fanfics#i'm testing out a new formatting for whenever i do these types of post idk if i like it or not ;~;
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Finding a photo of his ex
Sylus x Non-MC
summary: a painful break up with your ex left you insecure, like you were never enough no matter what you do. then Sylus came to mend your heart. but when you found out who his past girlfriend was, you're left thinking: will he be like your ex?
tags: insecurities, exes zayne and non-mc, slight angst, comfort, fluff, sweet bf sylus, not set in LADS universe, VERY OOC Zayne description
note: SORRY ZAYNE I LOVE YOU PLS FORGIVE ME
taglist: @animegamerfox @lazypostfandomer
It was an accident. You were rummaging in Sylus's storage room looking for some books to pass by some time. You found one that piqued your interest; the book is squished under one of the old boxes obviously forgotten you pulled it out and looked over the pages.
As you were skimming, a photograph fell to the floor. When you picked it up and examined the photo your breath hitched when your eyes saw a familiar woman.
In the photo, she is grinning from ear to ear while Sylus gives her hand a kiss.
It was MC with Sylus.
This is not the first time you encountered her. Since she is a woman you know too well. The very woman who is the reason for your insecurities. The same woman who stole your previous boyfriend away.
You took a deep breath trying to calm yourself down. You knew that Sylus had a previous relationship. He knew about your past as well but you didn't expect that MC would be his ex.
Well, you didn't ask, that's one thing. But life seems to just like playing with you. Seeing her face again brought back bitter memories and little seeds of doubt started sprouting in your heart.
You didn’t mean to fall for another one of MC’s ghosts.
Zayne was first. Quiet, reserved, and soft spoken Doctor Zayne. You remembered chasing him back then. Asking to get noticed, being overly happy when given a mere glance. So when he relented and gave you a “chance" you wasted no time and showed him how much you love him.
At first, it was okay. You keep telling yourself that it's just the way he is and in no time, he will open up to you and let his walls break down but that didn't happen.
Not with you, at least.
Because when you saw him one time laughing and smiling with his childhood friend, suddenly everything just made sense.
What you were begging for him to do with you comes so naturally for him when it comes to her.
Lunch with you in the office? Nope, too unprofessional. But with MC, he would even go as far as cooking for the both of them.
Dinner after work? He's too tired to even lift a leg. But wouldn't mind driving to go to her place when she asked him to.
One social media post about you? Oh hell nah. He is not a social media person anyway. But would occasionally post their arcade escapades with a sassy caption.
You confronted him about it, but he just told you that it meant nothing. That she is a childhood friend nothing more and that she has a boyfriend.
But you knew that he was lying of course. You spent ages trying to learn him and loving him. You saw how his eyes had that air of sadness and anger when says that MC already has a boyfriend.
It was not a surprise when he started spending less time with you when the news of MC and her boyfriend broke up. Of course he'd be there.
But the more he kept choosing to be with her, the more you started spiralling to sadness as well.
You kept trying and trying to keep him by your side. Being the docile girlfriend that he needs. Never demanding, never yelling, never crying.
You held onto him long enough to believe he might look back.
But he never did.
So you let him go.
Or maybe he let you go first, you didn't know.
The break up became more of a relief for him and that's what struck the most. A part of you hoped he would at least feel remorseful and maybe even regret but there is none.
So you left. But with more insecurities as ever.
Was it really that hard for him to love you?
Was there anything you didn't do?
Why was it easy for him to just let you go and leave like you didn't matter?
Did he really love you or did he just get in a relationship with you to stop you from chasing him like a wild dog?
You ponder over it for a year or two. Just accepting that maybe you're just no match for her and guys like Zayne would always, always choose a woman like her over a woman like you. Because of that you swore to never love again.
Then came Sylus.
Rough, loud, reckless Sylus, who didn’t ask you to be anything. The same Sylus who didn't force you to return his feelings when he figured that you weren't ready yet and let you at your own pace.
Sylus who became the receiving end of your insecurities but gently kissed all the doubts away. Sylus who made you feel like loving again doesn't sound bad as it seems.
With him, the ache didn’t fade to zero but it stopped owning you.
Not until you saw this photo.
You have been doing a good job of reigning over the dark thoughts brought by your past but seeing this just makes you question everything.
Sylus never gave you a chance to doubt him. He showed you every day that his eyes are set on you and you alone. That no matter how many women fawn over him, he will always choose you.
But because of this stupid photo, you're seeing yourself as that same woman five years ago. Pathetic and a loser content with just a scrap of affection from her boyfriend.
The boyfriend who will choose the same woman in this damned photo over and over again.
You knew Sylus isn't like that.
Right?
But a voice in your head tells you that it will only take a matter of time before he realizes that she is the better option. That you are not worth wasting his time for. That once the opportunity presents itself, he will toss you aside like Zayne did just so he can run to her.
Sobs broke out of your lips and the photo on your hand is already crumpled by how much you're gripping it.
Just the thought of Sylus giving you that cold dismissive look made your heart shatter. It didn't help when the memory of you breaking up with Zayne and he had the audacity to be relieved kept popping in your head but this time, Sylus's face was in it.
It had been five years since that night. But everything is still fresh. Everything is still vivid. You don't know where Zayne is. You're not gonna bother finding out anyway.
But you're in the same city and Sylus crossing paths with MC is not impossible.
What if he sees her and thinks that he's wasting time with you?
What if he is with you out of pity because of how miserable you were before?
Your head is aching at all the thoughts swirling in your mind.
“– Sweetie?” Sylus's voice took you out of your haze. "What's happening?”
He looks at your tears streaked face and he quickly gathers you in his arms, grounding you back to reality. You sobbed in his chest holding him tightly. Silently begging for him not to go.
He took your hand and gently removed the photo from your grip, throwing it away on the floor. Connecting two and two together.
“I'm sorry, darling. Should've thrown that away. I didn't know it's still there." You feel him kissing your head and rubbing your back trying to make you stop from crying.
“P-please, please, don't leave me for her," you whimpered. “I'll do everything … anything. Just don't go."
You held him tighter while hoping and begging.
You felt him stiffen and you brace yourself for the worst. Maybe this is the part that he tells you that he will still leave. Maybe it's a good thing that you finally gave him a way out of this relationship just like what Zayne did.
He cupped your cheeks and looked at you with such bewilderment. “Where is this coming from? I'm not leaving you, sweetie. Never in a million years."
Fresh set of tears fell from your eyes again.
“B-but it's her. Everyone chooses her.” You replied.
Sylus isn't strange to the fact that your ex left you as a mess. He was there to help you pick up the broken pieces after all. He still wants to beat up your ex for being such an asshole.
But hearing you say those words, a realization occurred to him.
"Her? You mean the woman you told me about was MC?"
You nodded your head.
"My sweet little darling,” he wiped your tears away. "Try not to worry about it, okay? I won't leave you. I would die before anyone could take me away from your side. I love you. I love you so much.”
You yelped when suddenly his strong arms are lifting you up carrying you, transporting you back to the living room and settling in the couch making you sit on his lap.
“The best days of my life are with you, sweetie. I'd be a fool to let you go." He said. Your heart thumping at the sincerity in his tone. “You are perfect for me. The one I've been waiting for my whole life. Even if the women from my past come back and try to take me, I will always choose you. I will always stay with you for as long as you want me to."
You looked at his eyes. Trying to find deception and lies. But all there was was his overwhelming sincerity. You're trying hard not to believe him, but there is something in his gaze that begs you to have faith in him.
“Don't say that," you said almost above a whisper.
“Hmm why not?" He said with a little teasing in his voice sensing the shift in your mood.
“I might not let you go if you keep telling me those things."
A low chuckle escaped his lips. "Is that so? Then allow me to shower you with assurance so you'll hold me tight, sweetie.”
He held one of your cheeks and looked you straight to the eyes, “I love you. I'm not like your ex. I won't leave. You're not a burden to me, darling. As long as I'm alive, you're wanted here in my heart, sweetie.”
When he leaned closer to kiss your lips, you held on to him tightly pulling him closer as you answered his kisses. One by one, all your doubts were washed away.
Every brush of his lips against yours is a confession of his love, his loyalty. One that you have never felt before in your previous relationship.
“I love you, Sylus." You said in between kisses. It made him groan and kiss you more fervently.
As Sylus held you tenderly, softly caressing you and kissing you gently, you feel a part of you getting healed.
As your bodies collide, he reminds you that for him you are enough.
And maybe that's all you needed. To feel loved, cherished and assured that no matter how perfect she might be, someone will choose you within a heartbeat.
Thoughts? Comments? Lemme hear ❤️ luv u! Hope u enjoyed.
#love and deepspace#sylus x non mc#lads sylus#lnds sylus#l&ds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#sylus x reader#lads fanfic#lads fic
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I love your headcannons so I gotta put an ask in here. As we all know, MC can act a bit childish and is quick to push touch/affection away.
It makes me think of the quote, "If you touch me without violence, you'll be the first". Would love a writing about it.
Aw thank you! I hope this is what you meant <3
Caleb
The first time Caleb touched you, you flinched.
It was barely anything—a fleeting brush of his fingers against yours as he handed you something, an innocent, meaningless gesture—but your entire body stiffened, your breath hitched, and before you even realized it, you had yanked your hand back.
The warmth of his skin lingered, and you hated it.
Caleb noticed. Of course, he did. His sharp violet eyes flickered with something unreadable, but he didn’t say anything. Not then.
But he never stopped touching you.
Not in a way that was forceful or overwhelming. Never in a way that felt like he was trying to push you past your boundaries. But it was there—the careful way his shoulder would bump into yours when you walked side by side, the way he’d place his hand on your lower back as he guided you through a crowd, the way his fingers would brush against your wrist when he passed you something.
Each time, your reaction was the same. A flinch. A step back. A refusal.
At first, he gave you space. He didn’t push, didn’t question. Caleb wasn’t the type to force someone into anything they weren’t ready for. But he wasn’t blind either. He saw the way your guard never dropped, the way your muscles tensed at even the gentlest touch.
And then, one night, he finally asked.
You were both standing outside, the city lights stretching far into the distance, stars barely visible beyond the haze. It was quiet between you, peaceful, until he broke it with a simple question.
“Why do you hate being touched?”
You froze.
Your fingers curled into fists, your heart hammering against your ribs. You wanted to ignore him, wanted to pretend you hadn’t heard, but Caleb wasn’t the kind of person who let things slide.
When you didn’t answer, he turned to face you fully, his voice steady but softer than usual. “It’s not just me, is it?” His eyes searched yours. “You don’t let anyone touch you.”
You swallowed hard.
And then you said it. The words that had been sitting on your tongue for years, unspoken, buried beneath layers of defense and survival.
“If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The weight of those words crushed the space between you.
Caleb didn’t react right away. He didn’t wince, didn’t gasp, didn’t give you that pitying look you dreaded seeing. Instead, he just stood there, his violet gaze locked onto yours, taking in everything you weren’t saying.
You braced yourself for rejection, for discomfort, for him to leave—but he didn’t.
Instead, after a long pause, he let out a slow breath and said, “…Then I guess I’ll have to be first.”
Your stomach twisted. “Caleb—”
“I won’t push you.” His voice was firm but patient. “I won’t touch you until you let me.”
That should’ve been the end of it. It should’ve been the part where you turned away and let him go, where he accepted your boundaries and never tried again.
But the problem was Caleb never stopped caring about you.
And worse? You had let yourself care about him too.
Caleb never tried to force his way into your space, never laid a hand on you without permission. But he stayed.
He stayed through the silence, through the bad days, through the moments when you wanted to push everyone away but couldn’t bring yourself to do it with him.
He made himself a constant.
And that was dangerous.
Because the longer he stayed, the more you caught yourself wanting to reach for him.
The more you caught yourself watching his hands—the same hands that had held weapons, that had taken lives, that had commanded entire fleets—and wondering how they would feel if they touched you gently.
The more you caught yourself leaning in just a little when he stood beside you, like some part of you was trying to unlearn a lifetime of flinching.
You weren’t used to it.
You weren’t used to someone treating you like you were something precious instead of something hardened. You weren’t used to someone looking at you like you were worth waiting for.
And it scared you.
Because if you let yourself have this, if you let him in—what then?
It happened one night when you weren’t thinking.
You had both been caught in a battle, pushed to your limits, and despite everything—despite all the odds—you had both made it out alive.
Caleb was covered in cuts and bruises, exhaustion heavy in his limbs, but the moment he saw you stumble, he reached for you instinctively—just like he always did.
And this time, for the first time, you didn’t pull away.
His hands found your arms, steadying you, grounding you. You felt his warmth, his strength—and you let him hold you.
It was so small. So insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Just his hands on your arms, steady and reassuring. But to you, it felt like something shattered.
Caleb stilled, his grip light, as if he half-expected you to come to your senses and shove him away. His eyes searched yours, cautious, waiting.
But you didn’t move.
For the first time, you let yourself be touched without bracing for pain.
Without expecting violence.
Without fear.
And the look Caleb gave you in that moment—soft, careful, like he knew exactly how much this meant even if you hadn’t said a word—was enough to make something inside you break.
You swallowed hard, pulse racing.
“You’re the first.” The words slipped out before you could stop them, barely a whisper, but Caleb heard them.
He exhaled slowly, his thumb brushing the edge of your sleeve in the gentlest motion imaginable.
“Then I’ll make sure I’m never the last.”
And you believed him.
For the first time in your life, you actually believed someone.
Because Caleb had never broken a promise to you before.
And deep down, you knew he never would.
Rafayel
Rafayel had always been affectionate—too affectionate, if you were being honest. It wasn’t just the teasing smirks or the casual way he draped himself over you like a cat seeking warmth. It was the way his hands would linger, the way his gaze softened when he looked at you, the way he spoke your name like it was something precious.
But you weren’t used to it.
So, when he leaned in too close, when his fingers brushed against yours absentmindedly, when his warmth wrapped around you in unspoken promises of safety, you pushed him away. Not roughly, not cruelly, but firm enough to make the message clear.
He didn’t take offense, at least not outwardly. Rafayel always bounced back with a lopsided grin, a lazy roll of his shoulders, as if to say, Fine, I’ll wait. But there was something in his eyes—something quieter, something more knowing.
And you hated that.
Because deep down, you knew what he saw.
He saw the way you flinched, even when his touch was gentle. He saw the way your shoulders tensed whenever he got too close, the way you shrank away from affection like it was a foreign language you never learned to speak.
Most people didn’t notice. Most people assumed you were just distant, that maybe you simply weren’t the affectionate type.
Rafayel knew better.
And that made him dangerous.
It started one evening, after one of his exhibitions. The gallery had emptied out, the patrons long gone, and yet he lingered, still basking in the afterglow of another successful night. You had stayed behind too, for reasons you weren’t entirely sure of. Maybe because he had asked. Maybe because it was easier than saying no to him.
He had pulled you into the back room where his latest painting was covered with a cloth. With a dramatic flourish, he yanked it away, revealing the canvas beneath.
It was you.
Not a perfect replica, not a stiff, lifeless portrait. It was you in motion, caught mid-laugh, the golden glow of light flickering behind you as if you were something divine.
It took your breath away.
You swallowed hard, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. “You painted this?”
“No, it painted itself.” Rafayel smirked, stepping closer. “Of course I painted it.”
You didn’t have words. You didn’t know how to process something so raw, so intimate. It was one thing for someone to look at you, but it was another thing entirely for someone to see you. And Rafayel had always seen you.
That was the problem.
“I—” The words stuck to your throat. You weren’t good at this. At accepting things. At being loved without conditions, without expectations.
And then, just like always, Rafayel reached for you.
His fingers, long and paint-stained, brushed against your wrist—light, hesitant, careful. No force, no demand, just warmth.
And just like always, you flinched.
You stepped back so fast you almost knocked over the easel. “Don’t.” The word escaped before you could stop it, sharp and unsteady.
Rafayel’s hand froze midair before he slowly pulled it back. His expression didn’t falter, but there was something—something—in his eyes. He tilted his head, studying you with that same knowing look that had always unsettled you.
“Why?” His voice was soft. Not teasing. Not mocking. Just curious.
Your throat tightened. You wanted to tell him to drop it. You wanted him to go back to making jokes, to fill the silence with something light, something meaningless.
But he didn’t.
Because Rafayel never let things go.
You swallowed. “Because… if you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The words hung between you, heavy and raw.
For a moment, there was silence.
Then Rafayel exhaled, slow and careful, as if he were afraid of shattering you. “Oh.”
He didn’t say anything else. He didn’t apologize, didn’t pity you. He just stood there, watching you with those piercing blue-pink eyes of his, like he was unraveling all the pieces of you you’d kept hidden for so long.
It made you want to run.
And maybe he saw that too, because he took a step back. Gave you space.
“Okay,” he said simply.
You blinked. “Okay?”
He nodded. “I won’t touch you. Not unless you want me to.”
The simplicity of it made something inside you ache.
You nodded, not trusting your voice.
For the first time in your life, someone didn’t demand. Someone didn’t take.
Someone just waited.
Days passed, and true to his word, Rafayel never touched you. He still leaned into your space, still gave you that infuriatingly charming grin, but his hands never reached for you again. Not once.
And you hated that you noticed.
You noticed the absence of his touch. You noticed the way his fingers twitched when he was excited, the way his hands curled into fists like he had to remind himself not to reach for you. You noticed how much you wanted him to.
It was terrifying.
It was exhilarating.
And one night, when he was sitting beside you, lazily sketching something while you both watched the waves crash against the shore, you made the first move.
It was small. Barely anything.
Just your pinky brushing against his.
But Rafayel noticed.
His breath hitched, and his gaze flickered to you, cautious, questioning.
You didn’t pull away.
Neither did he.
For a long moment, neither of you moved. The air between you felt electric, buzzing with something unspoken, something fragile.
Then Rafayel, ever patient, ever waiting, turned his hand palm-up beneath yours.
An invitation.
Not a demand.
You hesitated, your heart pounding, before slowly—so slowly—you let your fingers slip into his.
Warmth. Solid, steady warmth.
No violence.
No pain.
Just him.
Rafayel said nothing, didn’t make a big deal of it. He just held your hand like it was the most natural thing in the world. Like he had been waiting lifetimes for it.
And maybe, just maybe, you had been waiting too.
Sylus
The first time Sylus touched you, you flinched.
It was subtle—just a stiffening of your shoulders, a flicker of tension in your stance. But for someone as dangerously observant as Sylus, it was enough. His fingers had barely brushed your wrist—light, almost teasing—as he leaned in to whisper something low in your ear.
And yet, you recoiled.
He didn’t comment on it then, only let a smirk curl at the corner of his lips as if he hadn’t noticed.
But he had.
Of course, he had.
Sylus never missed anything.
Sylus was nothing if not patient.
He had seen resistance before. He had encountered people who feared him, people who worshipped him, people who wanted something from him. But you?
You were different.
You didn’t fear him—you feared being touched.
And that… was fascinating.
So, he tested it.
Little things, at first. A hand at the small of your back as he guided you through a door. A knuckle brushing over your cheek under the excuse of tucking away a stray strand of hair. A moment where he let his fingers graze yours when he passed you something.
Every time, your body tensed—just slightly—but you didn’t pull away.
Not right away.
You always let it happen for a heartbeat longer than necessary, as if waiting for something.
And that was when he knew.
You weren’t just unused to affection.
You were waiting for it to turn into something else.
Something harsher. Something cruel.
Something violent.
And that realization—that truth about you—made his blood burn with something he couldn’t quite name.
The night it finally broke, Sylus hadn’t meant to push too far.
It had been a long evening, tension thrumming beneath the surface between you both like an electric current. You had been irritatingly stubborn during negotiations, as always, challenging him, testing him, making him bite back a smirk as you stood your ground.
But the moment that lingered with him was after, when the night had settled and you had found yourself alone in his office.
He approached you like he always did—without hesitation.
This time, he touched your face, his thumb grazing over your cheek in a slow, deliberate motion. It wasn’t just teasing.
It wasn’t just a test.
It was real.
And you panicked.
You slapped his hand away, hard. The sound cracked through the air, sharp and startling, but Sylus didn’t react. He barely blinked, only watching as you took a step back, breath uneven, eyes wild.
His fingers flexed once before he let them drop to his side.
For a moment, there was silence.
Then, quietly—
"If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first."
It wasn’t said with anger. It wasn’t a warning or a threat.
It was just… the truth.
And Sylus, for once in his life, didn’t have a response.
Something Unspoken
After that, he changed tactics.
He didn’t stop touching you entirely—no, never that. But he let you decide.
He let you approach him.
He gave you space but stayed close enough that you could always reach him if you wanted to.
And, for a while, you didn’t.
But then—
One night, after an exhausting mission, you sat beside him, close enough that your shoulder brushed against his. You didn’t move away.
Another time, when exhaustion weighed on you, you let him take your wrist to check your pulse, your fingers trembling slightly—but not from fear.
And then, the night that changed everything—
You let him touch your face again.
This time, when his hand cradled your cheek, you leaned into it.
Not much. Just a fraction. Just enough that he could feel the shift.
Just enough for him to know.
And that was all the permission he needed.
Slowly, deliberately, his thumb traced the curve of your jaw, his voice low when he finally spoke:
"I would never hurt you."
Your breath hitched.
He felt it.
He didn’t ask why it was so hard for you to believe him. He didn’t ask who had left you expecting pain from every touch, from every lingering moment.
He only let his hand remain where it was, grounding, steady—yours, if you wanted it.
And finally, you did.
You didn’t say anything that night. You didn’t have to.
But after that, something changed.
Sylus, perceptive as always, noticed immediately.
The way your body no longer tensed at his presence. The way you lingered just a little closer when you stood beside him. The way your fingers, hesitant at first, brushed against the sleeve of his coat as if testing a boundary you weren’t sure you were allowed to cross.
And the way, eventually, you did.
It happened late one evening, when the city outside was silent, the only sounds in the room the distant hum of a record player spinning on low and the soft shuffle of papers on his desk.
You had been sitting across from him, absentmindedly twirling a pen between your fingers when, out of nowhere—you reached for him.
Your hand, small but steady, settled against his.
No hesitation. No flinching. No fear.
Sylus, always composed, almost stopped breathing.
You didn’t say anything, and neither did he.
But his fingers curled over yours, slow, deliberate—a silent promise.
A promise that, for the first time in your life, someone’s touch wouldn’t bring pain.
And that was enough.
For now.
Xavier
The first time Xavier reached for you, you flinched.
It was instinct, sharp and immediate. His fingers had barely brushed your sleeve before you jerked away, stepping out of reach so fast you nearly tripped over your own feet. His hand hung in the air for a moment before he slowly lowered it, tilting his head as if trying to decipher something unsaid.
You weren’t looking at him, though. You were staring at your own hands, fingers curled into fists at your sides, knuckles tight. Get it together.
"You okay?" His voice was light, easy, like he hadn’t just watched you recoil from his touch as if it burned.
You forced yourself to nod. "Yeah. Just—" You hesitated, then exhaled sharply. "You shouldn’t do that."
Xavier raised an eyebrow. "Do what?"
You lifted your chin, meeting his gaze with something colder than you really felt. "Touch me."
His eyes flickered with something unreadable before his expression shifted back to something more familiar—a smirk, teasing but careful. "Alright," he said, as if it didn’t matter. "No touching."
Except it did matter. Because Xavier wasn’t someone who kept his hands to himself—not in an intrusive way, but in a way that made him feel real. He was the kind of person who nudged you with his elbow when he made a joke, who ruffled your hair just to annoy you, who tugged at your sleeve when he wanted your attention.
But he listened.
For the next few weeks, he was careful. He kept his distance, kept his hands in his pockets, kept a respectable space between the two of you even when it was just the two of you on a mission, walking side by side.
And for some reason, it made your chest ache.
You wanted him close.
You just didn’t know how to let him be.
It wasn’t that you didn’t like him. If anything, that was the problem.
Xavier had wormed his way into your life in a way no one else had before. He was constant—too constant, maybe. There was no hesitation in the way he cared, no moment of doubt in his affection. He liked you, so he showed it. He wanted to be around you, so he was. There was no second-guessing, no caution.
You didn’t know what to do with that.
Because affection had always come with conditions. Because touches had always been accompanied by something sharp—by expectation, by control, by violence.
So the idea of Xavier touching you with nothing but warmth?
It scared you more than any fight ever had.
"You ever gonna tell me why?"
You blinked up from where you sat at the edge of a rooftop, staring out at the cityscape below. Xavier was standing a few feet away, arms crossed, gaze unreadable.
"Why what?"
"Why you don’t like me touching you." His voice wasn’t accusing, wasn’t pushing—it was just curious.
You swallowed. "I just don’t."
Xavier hummed, as if considering that. "You sure about that?"
You tensed. "What’s that supposed to mean?"
He shrugged, stepping forward—not close, but closer. "I’ve seen the way you look at me sometimes."
Your heart skipped. "I don’t—"
"You do," he interrupted, voice softer now. "Like you want me to reach for you, but you don’t know if you should let me."
You exhaled sharply. "It’s not that simple."
"Then explain it to me."
Your fingers curled against the fabric of your sleeves, gripping tightly. You should have expected this—Xavier wasn’t the type to let things go so easily. He was patient, sure, but he wasn’t blind. He noticed things, noticed you.
And now, he was waiting.
You stared at your hands. "If you touch me without violence," you murmured, voice barely above a whisper, "you’ll be the first."
Silence.
For a moment, you thought he might not have heard you. But then, after a long pause, Xavier let out a quiet breath.
"That’s a damn shame," he said. His voice was soft, but not pitying. "Because you deserve better than that."
You didn’t look at him. "Maybe."
"You do," he said, firmer this time. "And I want to prove it to you."
Your breath hitched. "Xavier—"
"I won’t touch you until you want me to," he promised. "But when you do?" His gaze was steady, unwavering. "I’ll make sure you never have to doubt it."
It took time.
Xavier kept his promise. He didn’t touch you—not even accidentally. He was careful, patient in a way that made your chest ache. But he never pulled away emotionally. He was still there, still unwavering, still him.
And slowly, slowly, you started to realize something.
You wanted to close that distance.
You wanted him.
It started small—lingering closer when you walked together, sitting next to him instead of across the room, letting your shoulders brush just slightly before pulling away. And Xavier noticed. He always did.
But he didn’t push.
He let you take your time, let you move at your own pace.
Until one night, after a mission, when you were exhausted and sore and tired of your own fear, you turned to him and—hesitantly, carefully—reached for his hand.
His fingers twitched in surprise, but he didn’t hesitate. He let you take his hand in yours, let you squeeze it lightly before letting go just as quickly.
You expected him to say something—maybe tease you, maybe push for more. But he didn’t. He just smiled, warm and real.
"Was that so bad?" he asked, amusement lacing his tone.
You huffed, rolling your eyes. "Shut up."
Xavier chuckled, but there was something softer in his gaze. "Alright. No teasing. Not today, anyway."
You nudged him lightly with your elbow. "I hate you."
He grinned. "You love me."
You paused.
Then, quietly, you admitted, "Yeah."
Xavier stilled. His smile faltered—just for a second—before it softened into something genuine. Something real.
"Good," he murmured.
And for the first time, when he reached for you, you didn’t pull away.
Zayne
Zayne had always been patient. It was in his nature, woven into the fabric of his being just as much as his steady hands and level-headed presence. As a surgeon, patience was a necessity—an unwavering calm in the face of pressure, a stillness when chaos reigned.
But this was different.
This was you.
You, with your guarded eyes and the walls you built around yourself so high that even he, with all his skill, couldn’t navigate them easily. He had known from the start that you were different—not because you were difficult, not because you weren’t capable of love, but because the world had been cruel to you in ways it hadn’t been to him.
And still, he wanted you.
It started slow. The quiet companionship, the moments where neither of you needed to speak but simply existed together. A shared cup of tea in the morning. The warmth of his coat draped over your shoulders on a cold night. He never pushed, never asked for more than you could give, and yet…
Even he had limits to his patience.
Zayne had always been affectionate. Not in a way that was overwhelming, nor in grand declarations. No, his love was in the small things—in the way his fingers would brush against yours when passing you something, in the way his voice would soften when speaking your name, in the way he would lean in, close enough that you could feel his warmth but never quite touching.
And so, when he reached for you one evening—just a simple touch, the lightest brush of his fingertips against your wrist—he hadn’t expected you to recoil the way you did.
You flinched, your entire body going rigid, as if his touch had burned you.
Zayne froze. His hazel-green eyes flickered with something unreadable before he slowly withdrew his hand, watching you carefully. He wasn’t offended, nor was he hurt, but there was something in his expression that made your stomach twist.
“Don’t,” you whispered, your voice quieter than you intended.
His brows furrowed slightly. “I—”
“If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The words tumbled out before you could stop them, raw and sharp. The room felt heavier in their wake, like the air had been sucked from it.
Zayne didn’t speak for a moment. He simply looked at you, studying you in that careful way he always did—like he was dissecting a puzzle, trying to understand without breaking it further.
You hated the silence. Hated the way it stretched between you like an open wound.
Then, finally, he exhaled softly.
“I see.”
And just like that, he shifted back, putting a comfortable distance between you. Not out of rejection, not out of frustration, but because he understood. He always understood.
You expected him to ask. To pry. To demand to know what had led you to this—why you had flinched, why you had spoken those words with such bitterness. But he didn’t.
He simply nodded, accepting it as fact, and changed the subject.
It should have been a relief.
It wasn’t.
Because Zayne, for all his patience and for all his understanding, was not one to simply forget.
Days passed. Then weeks.
Zayne hadn’t touched you since.
Not in the way he used to. No fleeting brushes of his fingertips, no teasing nudges, no quiet, lingering moments where his warmth bled into yours. It was as if he had drawn a line in the sand and refused to cross it.
You told yourself it was for the best.
So why did it feel so much worse?
You had never needed touch. Never craved it, never longed for it. But now, in the absence of it, you felt its loss like a phantom pain. You missed it.
You missed him.
And so, when you found yourself standing outside his apartment one evening, your fingers curled into fists at your sides, you knew you had to do something.
The door opened before you could even knock.
Zayne blinked at you, surprised but not displeased. He stepped aside, wordlessly inviting you in.
You hesitated.
And then, taking a deep breath, you walked past him, into the familiar warmth of his home.
He didn’t ask why you were there.
He simply poured you tea, as he always did, and waited.
You stared at the cup in your hands, fingers tightening around the ceramic.
“I don’t…” You hesitated. “I don’t want you to stop.”
Zayne tilted his head slightly, watching you with quiet patience. “Stop what?”
You swallowed. “Touching me.”
For the first time in a long while, he seemed genuinely surprised. Not in a dramatic way—Zayne was never dramatic—but in the way his fingers stilled against his cup, in the way his gaze softened ever so slightly.
“I thought that’s what you wanted,” he said, his voice as steady as ever.
“I did.” Your throat felt tight. “I do. But I also… I don’t know.” You exhaled sharply. “I just… don’t want you to stop trying.”
Something in his expression shifted.
He set his cup down carefully before looking at you with an intensity that made your stomach twist. Not with judgment, not with pity—just understanding.
“I never stopped,” he murmured.
Your breath hitched.
“I just adjusted,” he continued. “To what you needed.”
And you realized, with startling clarity, that he had been touching you. Just not in the way you had expected.
It was in the way he always made you tea, the way he listened so intently, the way he never pushed, never pried, but always made sure you knew he was there.
He had been touching you in the only way you would allow.
And now? Now, you wanted more.
Tentatively, hesitantly, you reached out.
Your fingers brushed against the back of his hand, and you felt him still beneath your touch.
It was light. Barely there. But it was enough.
Zayne didn’t move. Didn’t push for more.
He simply let you choose.
And, for the first time in your life, you did.
You let yourself be touched—gently, without violence, without fear.
Zayne, patient as ever, simply held still and let you set the pace.
And maybe, just maybe, for the first time in a long time, you weren’t afraid.
#Xavier#Xavier x mc#Xavier x reader#Xavier x you#Xavier love and deepspace#Love and deepspace#Rafayel#Rafayel x mc#Rafayel x reader#Rafayel x you#Rafayel love and deepspace#Zayne#Zayne x mc#Zayne x reader#Zayne x you#Zayne love and deepspace#Caleb#Caleb x mc#Caleb x reader#Caleb x you#Caleb love and deepspace#Prompt#Sylus#Sylus x mc#Sylus x reader#Sylus x you#Sylus love and deepspace
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Solomon: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?
MC: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.
Solomon: That wasn't an ambulance, I drove you.
MC: But I heard a siren.
Solomon: That was Mammon.
Mammon: Sorry, I got nervous-
——
Belphegor: If we put Solomon and Barbatos in a room, who would come out crying first?
Diavolo: The room.
——
Barbatos: Where's Satan..?
MC: Doing stuff.
Barbatos: I don't like the sound of that. Where's Lucifer?
MC: Trying to stop Satan. from doing the stuff.
Barbatos: And Asmodeus?
MC: Trying to stop Lucifer from stopping Satan. from doing the stuff.
Barbatos: I see. And what are you doing here, MC?
MC: I'm supposed to stop you from stopping Asmodeus from stopping Lucifer from stopping Satan, from doing the stuff.
——
Mammon: You can trust me! Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river when you were six.
Levi: let's not forget who pushed me in
——
Lucifer: You don’t want MC to die
Simeon: Right.
Lucifer: And I don't want MC to die.
Simeon: Right.
Lucifer: So we just have to make sure MC doesn’t want MC to die.
Simeon: Wonderful plan, but have you met MC?
——
Asmodeus: Do you think I’m ugly?
Solomon: It’s not about looks, Asmodeus. What’s valuable is on the inside...
Asmodeus: Aww.. Sol...
Solomon: For example, someone's heart.
Asmodeus: Aw... Stop it-
Solomon: It could be purchased for more than a million dollars, you know.
Asmodeus: Seriously, stop it.
——
Diavolo: Words ending in 'ie' just sound so adorable. Like cutie, sweetie, cookie-
MC: Eyy, homie!
Leviathan: But then there's cootie...
Belphegor: Die.
——
Lucifer: Who broke the toaster?
Satan: It was Mammon.
Asmodeus: It was Mammon.
Beelzebub: Mammon broke it.
Mammon:
Mammon: ...yOU PROMISED-
——
Luke: Everyone thinks I'm this soft cute person but I'm not!
Simeon: Luke, you cried for an hour after stepping on a bug yesterday.
Luke: It had feelings! It was probably going home to dinner and I killed it!
Solomon: ...It was a bug…
Luke: It was a BEETLE, and its wife is definitely worried sick, wondering where it is, and I really don't get why you all think I'm so sentimental because I'm not!
Solomon: ...
Simeon: ...
Luke: Stop looking at me like that!
——
Asmodeus: Wow, this parking is as straight as I am.
Lucifer: I know I should be focused on the fact that you just came out, but HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY PARKING!
——
Mammon: I'm not that stupid!
Lucifer: Mammon, you literally ate the wax from a babybel.
Mammon: BELPHIE TOLD ME IT WAS EDIBLE!
——
Mephisto, referring to MC and Mammon: Those guys are dorks.
Lucifer, insulted: Yes, but they’re my dorks.
#obey me shall we date#omswd#obey me#obey me incorrect quotes#obey me me brothers#obey me dateables#obey me side characters#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me simeon#obey me solomon#obey me luke#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#obey me mc#obey me mephistopheles
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the boy is mine (l.dh) — part one
PAIRING. haechan x fem!reader (also jeno x reader) GENRES. smut, angst WORD COUNT. 19k CONTENTS. infidelity, alcohol & weed consumption (MC is a non-smoker if that matters to you), explicit smut (dirty talk, fingering, finger sucking, oral (receiving), rimming (receiving), groping/frottage, marking, spit play, (brief) ear play, breast play, creampies/unprotected sex (if you explicitly need me, a stranger on the internet, to tell you not to fuck raw, you are not responsible enough to be reading this. move along now), snowballing, public sex, car sex, riding, bratty dom-leaning switch!haechan, bratty sub-leaning switch!reader, sweet dom!jeno, face riding, handjob, overstimulation (receiving), praise kink (receiving), light degradation kink (giving), mating press, morning sex) NOTES. welcome back to meeeeeeee!!! i hope you enjoy this fic because i worked very hard on it!! please leave feedback if you liked it :) i would also greatly appreciate tips if you really liked it :3 THANK YOU LIKE THE HUUUUUGEST THANK YOU TO BRI (@jalitepng) FOR BETA READING THIS BIG OL FIC :D PLAYLIST. the boy is mine - ariana grande // fantasize - ariana grande (unreleased) // lowkey (feat. erykah badu) - teyana taylor // agora hills - doja cat // pussy is mine - miguel // softest touch - khalid // cut - tori kelly // seatbelt - josh levi // often - doja cat // surrender - nbdy
how can it be you and me? might be meant to be, can’t unsee it but i don’t wanna cause no scene i’m usually so unproblematic, so independent, tell me why ‘cause the boy is mine.
You suppose your fate was sealed from the beginning.
Even as you’re riding in the passenger seat of Yunjin’s car as she speeds down the freeway, your heart filled with a relief and fulfillment you haven’t had for the past six months, you can’t help but feel like something’s… lacking.
“So, spill,” you hear Seulgi pipe up from the backseat. “How many little British boy hearts did you break on your little Oxford trip?”
“Who says I broke any hearts?!” you exclaim with an incredulous laugh, and everyone in the car turns and gives you the same unimpressed look. “Oh, that was creepy. Did y’all plan that?”
“You were gone for six whole months and you want us to believe you got up to no romantic shenanigans? Hm?” Seulgi asks, narrowing her eyes at you, and you narrow yours right back.
“I didn’t break any hearts!” you defend yourself, and Chaewon sighs.
“Did you stow away a cute British boy in your carry-on?” she asks, and you make a face.
“Certainly not.”
“Then there’s a broken heart floating around in Oxford as we speak!” Chaewon insists, and you scowl.
“Let me out right here.” you mutter, turning to open the door on the freeway, laughing as the other inhabitants of the car gasp and shriek in alarm. “I’m joking!”
“You’re crazy, that's what you are.” Yunjin clarifies, and you giggle.
“I was having a laugh.” you say unapologetically. “Anyway, I didn’t really get up to too much in Oxford, really. I was focused on studying, I guess.”
“Oh, lame!” Seulgi boos, and you roll your eyes.
“I’m here now, though, so the hot girl spring and summer can commence!” you say happily, and your friends cheer.
“Winter just texted asking if we got you off the plane okay,” Chaewon announces, and you shake your head.
“Tell her my seatbelt got stuck and wouldn’t let me out and so they took me back to England.” you suggest, and Yunjin snickers.
“Tell her the pilot got confused and took her to the wrong New York. If she asks what other New York, just be like, ‘the other one?’” she adds on, and Chaewon snorts.
“You’re both terrible.” she laughs as she types in a response.
“What’d you tell her?” Seulgi asks.
“That she got held back for getting her bag searched and they found five kilos of cocaine. So they took her out back and made her snort all of it as punishment and now she’s running amok in the city like Cocaine Bear. She’ll beat us back to the house.”
“And we’re terrible?!” you exclaim indignantly.
“Well, yes.” Chaewon replies calmly. “Mine is obviously a lie.”
“Wh— My seatbelt getting stuck isn’t an obvious lie?” you splutter.
“Well, that could actually happen!” she defends, and you blink at her incredulously.
“I didn’t expect the lesbian to forget that scissors exist.”
Chaewon’s jaw drops and she jabs a finger in your direction. “Homophobe!” She turns to Seulgi for support, but Seulgi just shakes her head.
“You’re alone in this one, Chae,” Seulgi giggles. “I laughed, I’m sorry.”
“Man, this is some bullshit.” Chaewon grumbles. “You’re supposed to have my back! We’re… we’re sapphic sistren!”
“You actually did not just say that.” Seulgi marvels. “Sapphic sistren is crazy.”
“I had to pull the gay card to win.” Chaewon says with a shrug. “I’m not sorry.”
“Can we get back on topic, please?” Yunjin laughs incredulously. “Jesus, it’s like if you put squirrels on a podcast.”
“We should make a podcast, actually.” Seulgi suggests, and you nod.
“We could call it ‘That’s Nuts,’” you say excitedly.
Chaewon snorts. “I’m in.”
Yunjin beeps her horn loudly, garnering all of your attention as you all jump in surprise. “We’re outside all spring and summer, right?”
“Well, after work, yeah.” you agree, and she smiles, nodding.
“I don’t want to hear you missed out on a fun fling or opportunity because you were busy working.” Yunjin jabs her finger at you accusingly, and your hands fly up defensively.
“In my defense, doing my job is way less risky than taking chances romantically.”
“Yeah, but where’s the fun in that?” Yunjin complains. “Live, girl!”
“There are gonna be cute guys at the party, obviously. So I will live!” you insist, and Yunjin nods.
“That’s more like it.”
Returning to your thoughts for a moment, it dawns on you that romantic excitement is exactly what you’re lacking. You want to love; you want to love someone and be loved by that someone and for that love to be something beautiful and consuming, and you’re not sure how much longer you’re going to have to wait.
You’re in the middle of making a mental pact with yourself to be just a bit more daring, a tad more forward and bold when it comes to love, when Seulgi and Chaewon laugh loudly at something on one of their phones, snapping you out of your internal monologue, and you shift in your seat, turning to face them.
“I can’t believe you guys left your whole apartment unattended during a house party just to welcome me home,” you sniff dramatically, and Seulgi snorts.
“Anything for you, my friend.” she replies with a playful crinkle of her nose, and you reach out to pinch it lightly.
“Besides, it’s not like it’s completely unattended! Winter’s there.” Chaewon points out, and you raise your eyebrows skeptically.
“Right… what is her non-confrontational ass gonna do if something goes wrong?” you ask, and Seulgi winces.
“Good point. Maybe step on it, Yunjin.”
“I’m already going twenty over the speed limit!” she exclaims defensively.
“You’re not even exaggerating,” Chaewon half-gasps, half-laughs as she leans forward to look at the speedometer. “We might make it there quicker, but we might not make it there safely.”
“We are here for a good time!” Yunjin yells, whipping her hair around excitedly. “Not a long time!”
“Deeply concerning words coming from our driver.” Seulgi snickers quietly, and you nod, turning back to sit in your seat properly. “So…”
You peer at her through the rearview mirror curiously. “So?”
“I’m just imagining Jeno’s reaction when he sees you again for the first time.” She shrugs with a faint teasing smile, and you can feel your cheeks warming as a small smile starts to tug at your lips.
Jeno’s had a thing for you for the past… year and a half—at least, that you’re aware of—and you won’t lie, he’s definitely easy on the eyes and a sweetheart to top it all off. Before you went away to Oxford, you two had built up a bit of a flirtationship that neither of you tried to push further because of your study abroad trip you had planned.
Now, however, you’re back, and you’re admittedly excited to see if it leads to something worthwhile.
“He’ll probably do that little crescent-eyed smile he always does when you spare him a crumb of attention.” Chaewon supplies as you’re lost in thought, and you roll your eyes as Yunjin nods knowingly.
“I’m willing to bet he’s gonna try to be glued to your side all night.” she adds, and you sigh loudly and dramatically.
“You guys are really something else, you know that?”
“You love it!” Chaewon says confidently, and you can’t help but smile fondly, nodding in agreement.
“I kinda do.”
Yunjin spares you a sideways glance that lingers for suspiciously long on your frame, and you raise an eyebrow.
“My eyes are up here.” you joke, waving a hand in her line of sight, “and, more importantly, the road is over there.” She chuckles and relents, refocusing her attention on the road, but she has that telltale look on her face that usually means she has something on her mind. “What are you thinking about?”
“Well—not that I’m judging at all, because, you know… live your life, girl.” Yunjin pipes up, and you turn to look at her, curiously awaiting the rest of her thought. “But are you gonna wear that to the party?”
You look down at your comfortable sweats and hoodie, perfect airport attire, and look back up at Yunjin with a playful frown. “What, is this not cute enough?”
“Well…” she trails off, and Seulgi pops her head forward between the front two car seats.
“No! It’s not a good enough outfit! You’re the guest of honor at your own welcome home party, and you have to come harder than some cozy gray sweats with a hole by the ankle.” Seulgi scolds, and you roll your eyes with an amused smile.
“Obviously I’m not going to wear this to the party, girl.” you laugh, and Seulgi sighs in relief. “I was just messing with you.”
“Well, cut it out! You know I’m gullible.” She frowns, and you reach into the backseat to pat her hand comfortingly.
“All the more reason to mess with you, my love.” you reply with a deceptively innocent smile. “Anyway, when we get back home, I have to shower and freshen up and change into my actual outfit. I also have to sort out the presents I brought back for everyone and make sure Jeno’s cake is still in good shape.”
“I still can’t believe you baked him a cake,” Chaewon marvels. “It’s giving domestic. Housewife, even.”
“Martha Stewart found jobless,” Seulgi adds, and you snort.
“I know this is his favorite type of cake, so I just… thought I’d make it for him.” you mumble quietly with a small, dismissive shrug.
“That is very cute to me,” Yunjin says reassuringly before punching the horn roughly and making the rest of the three of you jump in surprise. “Stupid fucker doesn’t know how to use his turn signal?!”
“Yunjin, calm down,” you advise, patting her knee gently.
“I am calm,” she replies, her tone level, and you pull your hand back, still eying her suspiciously. Sure enough, as she drives by the driver that failed to use his turn signal, she rolls her window down and yells out a string of expletives that makes Chaewon gasp in horror.
As Yunjin rolls her window back up and turns the radio up, you sit back and smile, thinking about how happy you are to be back at home.
You get home an entire eight minutes before your initial ETA, making Yunjin grin proudly when you make the announcement.
After your friends help you bring your luggage up to your apartment, you go into the bathroom to freshen up. After the extensive process that was showering, brushing your teeth, reapplying your skincare and makeup, and applying lotion and getting dressed, you emerge, fresh-faced and victorious, into your living room where your friends lie sprawled on your couch as they wait for you. The only eyesore about your appearance is the large sack you’re carrying of presents you brought back for your friends.
“I’m ready!” you chirp happily, and Yunjin is the first to look up from her phone at you, eyes taking in your casual and comfortable yet cute attire before she nods appreciatively.
“It’s giving Santa Claus,” Seulgi chuckles, gesturing at your large bag slung over your shoulder.
“Ho, ho, ho,” you drawl with an amused roll of your eyes.
“Stop it, Seulgi,” Chaewon scolds before focusing her gaze on you. “You look cute! Bet you-know-who’s gonna be all over you.” she says with a teasing grin, and you roll your eyes despite smiling before you set the bag down and set about getting out your gifts for your friends that are present.
You hand Yunjin a wrapped box of gorgeous shoes from an England-exclusive boutique and she sets about unwrapping it, her eyes widening with excitement as she reveals the present inside.
“Holy shit?” she gasps, gaping at the shoes. “These are perfect!”
“They’re so you,” you agree with a proud nod. “I saw them one day through a window while I was walking down the street and had to stop in and get them for you.”
“My turn, my turn!” Chaewon exclaims eagerly, bouncing in place as you root through your large sack and pull out a small wrapped box, which you hand to Chaewon carefully. She squeals in excitement once she’s opened the present, leaping up and engulfing you in a tight hug. “My perfume! I thought they discontinued it!”
“They stopped selling it in the States, but I managed to track down a store that still had some in stock, so I got you a couple—y’know, so you wouldn’t run out.” you say, smiling, and she beams at you.
“You’re the best.” she says seriously, looking you directly in the eyes to drive home her sincerity.
“I try,” you reply with a nonchalant shrug before reaching into the bag once more and pulling out one last present for Seulgi, wiggling the box at her invitingly.
“For moi?” she asks with feigned surprise, a hand to her chest.
“Indeed,” you confirm with a grin, and she sits forward, taking the gift from your hand and opening it up.
“Oh, my God.” she exhales in shock, staring down at the designer earrings and bracelet set. “These look expensive as fuck.”
“They kinda were,” you admit sheepishly. “All of your gifts were a pretty penny, actually, but you guys definitely deserve them. Those really spoke to me, and I thought they’d look gorgeous on you.”
“Thank you, my love,” Seulgi coos affectionately, standing up to engulf you in a hug. Yunjin and Chaewon join in a brief moment after, the four of you hugging tightly for a lingering, blissful moment.
“You’re all very welcome. Are we ready to go now?” you say, changing the subject with ease even as your voice is muffled into Seulgi’s shoulder, and Seulgi pulls back immediately with an emphatic nod.
“Ready as ever! Our fridge has snacks that are calling to me from over here.”
“You’re such a drama queen.” you scoff in amusement as you all head to your front door and file out after each other.
“Must have gotten it from hanging out around you.” she replies with playfully narrowed eyes in your direction.
“Oh, really?” you challenge, biting back a laugh, and she nods, puffing out her chest comically as she chest-bumps you on purpose. “Assaulting me in the middle of my apartment complex is actually wild and unheard of, and you will be hearing from my attorney.”
“Bring it on, baby!” she urges, and Yunjin rolls her eyes in poorly concealed amusement as you two start to giggle at your antics, the sounds of mirth ringing out in the lobby as you exit the elevator.
“You two are so strange,” she remarks in wonder. “But later for that. Onto more pressing matters!”
“Such as?” you question, holding the door open for Chaewon to follow behind you into the street.
“How long will it take us to get from our house to yours?” Yunjin asks, pulling out her phone to search for it, but Chaewon seems to be one step ahead, already focused on her phone screen.
“The travel time from here to our house,” she announces loudly, squinting at her phone momentarily, “is roughly twenty minutes.” You all stand around Yunjin’s car at your respective doors, waiting for Yunjin to unlock the car so you can get in.
“Hm, yeah? Why so long?” Yunjin asks curiously as she moves to look over Chaewon’s shoulder. “Traffic, huh? …I bet I can shave that time down to fifteen minutes.” Her eyes glint with excitement as she presses her car door remote, the sudden and loud beep-beep of the doors unlocking making you and Seulgi flinch for a moment.
“Dear Lord, help us all,” Seulgi mumbles as you all climb into Yunjin’s car, strapping in before she peels out of her parking space and zooms into the night.
True to her word, Yunjin precariously shaves six minutes off your travel time and you pull up to Chaewon’s and Seulgi’s apartment earlier than anticipated, exhilarated and pumped full of adrenaline.
“Are you excited to be back at La Casa Payasa?” Seulgi asks with a smile, and you nod with a relieved sigh.
“It’s just like I remember it.” you hum fondly as you head up to their door and bring your fist to the door, only getting to knock once before the door swings open and Mark throws himself at you for a hug.
You catch him with a surprised laugh, stumbling back from the impact slightly but returning the tight hug nonetheless. He tucks his face into your neck and mumbles something that you can’t hear, prompting you to pull back slightly.
“I didn’t hear a word you said,” you chuckle, and he pulls back as well so you can see his bright smile.
“I missed you so much,” he repeats, and you coo fondly, pulling him back into the hug.
“I missed you, too!” you chirp warmly, squeezing him in the hug for good measure. When you two pull apart, Chenle’s standing beside Mark and grinning at you. “Hey, Chenle!”
“Hey, stranger,” he teases, pulling you into a hug of his own. “Long time, huh? Let’s hear that British accent you developed over there.”
“I don’t know what you’re on about,” you reply in your best British impression, and he bursts out laughing.
“Man, that’s good stuff,” he chuckles with a shake of his head. “We missed you over here!” he complains, moving to swat you on the arm. “Don’t leave again.”
“I’ll do my best to stick around.” you assure him, and he smiles and nods, content.
“Now what’s with this big ass bag you’re carrying, huh? Did you stow away some British goodies for us?” Chenle asks curiously, pinching the fabric of the sack over your shoulder.
“Something like that,” you say slowly before you set it down and reach inside, handing Chenle and Mark their respective gifts. As they open them, Mark being considerably more careful than Chenle, you wait, hands clasped behind your back and rocking back and forth on your heels.
“How the hell did you get a signed Steph Curry jersey?” Chenle questions, baffled and thrilled, and you shrug with a secretive smile.
“I have my ways.”
“Never mind that—how did you get Frank Ocean himself to sign this album?” Mark asks, downright bewildered, and you shrug again.
“Ways that I have… that are mine.”
“You’re so silly, but this is amazing,” Chenle laughs, hugging you. “Thank you so much!”
“You’re welcome,” you lilt sweetly, and Mark looks up from the Frank Ocean vinyl again to meet your inquisitive gaze with wide, awestruck eyes.
“You’re incredible. Genuinely.” he stammers, and you smile widely as he pulls you into a hug as well once Chenle’s released you.
“I do my best,” you reply happily.
“Wait, also, how was your flight? Anything crazy happen?” Chenle asks curiously, and you pause as you think back.
“Actually, yeah; these two guys got into a verbal argument and then one of ‘em was like, ‘I’ll beat everyone’s ass right now!’ Which, objectively, is a crazy thing to say, but crazier to insist when you’re in a metal contraption thousands of feet in the air.” you start explaining, and Chenle’s eyes widen.
“No way,” he mumbles. “Then what?”
“Then he started threatening the flight crew, and I’m pretty sure he got placed on the no-fly list.” you finish with a solemn nod, and Mark gasps.
“I could never imagine never being able to fly again.” he mutters in awe, and you nod in agreement.
“I know, right? He had it coming, though.” you say, and they shrug, nodding in agreement.
“I guess so,” Mark agrees before his face lights up as he seems to remember something. “Hey, where’s Jeno? He’s been waiting for you to show up.”
“I think he’s with Winter and Haechan right now,” Chenle answers, and you scrunch your face up in confusion.
“Who’s Haechan?” you ask, baffled, before it dawns on you. “Oh, wait, that’s Winter’s new boyfriend?” you ask, and they nod. “I see… well, can’t wait to meet him, I guess.” You shrug indifferently, now craning your head to look around for Jeno.
You spot him before he spots you, the male standing alone texting on his phone by the couch. As if he can sense you looking, he looks up and his eyes lock on yours a moment later, his entire face brightening up as he starts to make his way over to where you’re standing.
By the time he’s where you are, you’re both sporting excited yet shy smiles as he opens his arms for a hug and you step into it. His arms drop to your waist and you wrap yours around his middle as he squeezes you gently.
“Hey,” he mumbles into the embrace, a smile audible in his voice.
“Hey, there.” you greet.
“Welcome back.”
“Good to be back,” you reply with a little grin.
“Did you have a good flight?” he asks curiously, and you nod.
“Minus a crazy guy on the plane, but it all ended fine,” you assure him, and he looks momentarily bewildered but manages to rein in his reaction.
“That’s good, I think… what seat did you get?” he questions, leaving you somewhat touched by his thoughtful questions.
“I got a window seat,” you answer with a smile, and he nods in approval.
“I love a good window seat,” he hums. “Did you watch a movie or nap or something?”
“I napped for a bit, yeah,” you chuckle, suddenly remembering how you’d had a bit of drool dried on your cheek earlier. Subconsciously wiping at the spot, you smile up at him casually. “I’m still a little tired, though.”
He frowns sympathetically before a little hopeful smile appears on his face. “Well, I hope you’re not too tired, because I wanted to give you something.”
Your eyes widen. “You got me something?”
He nods shyly. “I got you something. It’s in my car, though, and I parked kinda far, so I have to go get it. Come find me later when I come back so I can give it to you.”
“You got it,” you say with a smile. “I’ll come find you for sure. I actually have something for you, too, so we can trade.”
“Oh, no way! You’re the best.” He beams, squeezing your waist, at which point you realize you two never let go from the hug. Your cheeks on fire, you withdraw your arms from his middle and he does the same to you with an amused chuckle.
“I’m actually gonna go grab something from the kitchen,” you say, jerking a thumb in the direction of the hallway. “You want anything?”
“Nah, I’m good. I’m gonna run to the bathroom, actually.” he answers, and you nod before you two go your separate ways. You turn back at the sound of your name to see Jeno looking at you with a soft gaze and an even softer smile that makes you feel like you’re a giggly school girl all over again.
“It’s really good to have you back. It really wasn’t the same without you. Seeing all your Instagram stories gave me a crazy sense of FOMO, and our little phone calls here and there really made me miss you even more,” he says sincerely, and you place a hand over your heart, touched.
“I’m really happy to be back,” you assure him. “I missed you.” His brows flick upwards in surprise at your somewhat bold admission, and you blink twice in mild alarm before continuing in a slight rush with, “I—well, like, I missed you, and Yunjin, and Chae—I missed you all, y’know? The story posts were so you wouldn’t forget about little ol’ me. I loved our phone calls, but it’s so much better getting to talk to you in person.”
He laughs lightheartedly and nods, waving you off reassuringly. “I get you. Go get yourself some snacks! We didn’t stock up on your favorites for some random people to eat it all up before you get any.”
“Copy that,” you say with an emphatic nod, saluting him jokingly before heading to the kitchen.
As you’re making your way to the snacks, you catch the eye of a very handsome stranger leaning against the wall in your hallway talking to one of your friends from work. To your surprise, he doesn’t look away from you as you approach, even going so far as to turn his head as you walk by to keep staring at you.
You’re not sure if you’re more intrigued by him than by the challenge he’s posed, but you keep eye contact until you get to your kitchen and round the corner to find yourself a snack.
Moments after you’ve entered the room, you feel someone enter behind you, a smile coming to your lips as you realize who it most likely is.
When you turn to face the newcomer, he’s standing surprisingly close to you, his eyes scanning your face with an intrigue and intensity that leaves both of you a little breathless.
“Hi.” the handsome stranger says as his lips curl into a grin.
“Hi, there,” you echo, smiling back at him. ”Did you follow me in here?”
“Would you believe me if I said it was fate?”
You pretend to think about it. “By the way you watched me walk in here… no.”
He chuckles. “Fair. I had to ask you a question.”
“Luckily for you, I love questions.” you hum, placing both hands on the counter behind you and leaning against it in a silent invitation not only to ask his question, but also to approach.
Thankfully for you, he does both, stepping closer with a small chuckle and asking, “I was wondering if you believe in love at first sight.”
“Oh, brother—” you start to laugh, and he joins you before waving his hands to get you to stop.
“Hear me out!”
“My listening ears are on,” you reply with a smile and coy tilt of your head that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed, based on the way his already probing gaze intensifies.
“Do you?” he asks again, and you think about it for a moment.
“Not really,” you admit, letting out a small giggle at the disapproving look he gives you. “But maybe I can be convinced.”
He smiles widely, looking so bright that it truly dazzles you before continuing on to say, “I’m glad to hear that.”
“Why?” you ask. “Do you?”
“I don’t think I did,” he answers carefully, “until I saw you just now.”
“Oh, brother!” you burst out laughing—half from surprise and half from being flustered by how surprisingly sincere he sounded. In your attempt to recover from your outburst, you catch a glimpse of him to see that he’s gazing at you openly with a fond look in his eyes. “You are really something, you know that?”
He steps closer to you with a heat in his eyes, a glowing ember of intensity burning as he asks, “Something good or something bad?”
You shrug playfully and lean closer, wanting him nearer to you. “Jury’s still out on that part.”
He chuckles and wets his lips before his gaze drops to yours. “Can I present some new evidence?” he murmurs, and you tilt your head to the side as you pretend to think it over. “Has anyone ever told you that it’s really cute when you do that?”
“Of course,” you snicker. “Why do you think I do it?”
“So you’re turning up the charm right now, but you don’t believe in love at first sight?” he asks with a raised eyebrow.
“Is it love at first sight or attraction, sir?”
He grins and steps even closer, dangerously close to touching you. “So you’re attracted to me.”
You look around, confused. “Now who said all that?”
“You just did.”
”I most certainly did not.”
He half-scoffs, half-laughs in disbelief and points at you accusingly. “I heard you.”
“You heard wrong, I guess,” you reply with a nonchalant shrug before patting his chest twice. Your phone buzzes in your back pocket and you both hesitate, neither of you wanting to exit the intimate moment. However, when it buzzes a second time, then a third, you decide to give up and pull your phone from your pocket to check it.
jeno [23:04] hey i’m back
jeno [23:04] i have your surprise :)
jeno [23:05] let me know where to find you
You lock your phone and look up at the handsome stranger with a small frown. “Anyway, this was great, but I have to go find someone.”
He frowns deeply and catches your hand as it leaves his chest, lacing his fingers with yours and looking up at you. “Do you actually have to leave or am I making you nervous?”
“I told my friend I’d find him later, and it’s officially later,” you explain truthfully, and he seems to hear the sincerity in your voice, because he relaxes visibly. “Maybe I’ll find you after?” you offer, and he perks up, gently squeezing your hand.
“I’d like that.”
“Can I get a name? So I know who I’m looking for later?” you ask.
He smiles, shaking his head. “I’ll tell you when you find me later.”
You pout, and he smiles fondly at you. “I guess.” you relent, grabbing the soda and snacks you came to get off of the counter and heading towards the kitchen exit. “See you later?”
He nods resolutely. “See you later.”
You exit the kitchen with a small smile that threatens to take over your whole face if you don’t calm your spirits as you begin your second search of the night for Jeno.
After grabbing the presents you got for him from where you’d stashed them in Chaewon’s room, it doesn’t take you long at all to find him, the male still lingering by the entrance when you spot him. You sneak around a small group of people and pop up beside him, making him jolt in surprise and clutch his chest.
“Hi,” you giggle, and Jeno slumps with relief when his eyes lock on you, a warm smile coming to his face.
“Hey,” he chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
“So… how do you want to do this?” you ask curiously. “I can go first if you want?”
“No, I want to go first for sure,” he replies with a sureness in his voice that leaves you a little surprised and mildly impressed.
You gesture for him to start, still holding your present for him behind your back, and he retrieves two small, rectangular boxes from inside his jacket pocket.
“That looks expensive,” you say worriedly, and he chuckles fondly before waving a hand dismissively.
“It wasn’t too bad, don’t worry.” he replies reassuringly as he hands you the small boxes.
You gesture awkwardly with your hands still behind your back, trying your best to indicate that your hands are currently out of commission, and his eyes light up with understanding before he’s gingerly opening one of the navy blue boxes.
You gasp once you’ve peered into the box, your eyes wide as you look up at him in surprise. ”Jeno.”
“Is it too much? Oh, God, you hate it. I’m sorry–” he starts to worry aloud.
“Wait—Jeno—”
“I can take it back, maybe, and you can pick out something you’d like more—”
“Jeno?”
“I should have thought it through more carefully—”
”Jeno!” your voice is gentle in tone but loud enough to catch his attention, his worried eyes locking in on yours. “Please relax.”
“Sorry,” he mumbles embarrassedly, looking down at the floor.
“I was going to say that I genuinely love them. The necklace and the earrings are stunning, and they’re exactly my style.” you say sincerely, in awe as you stare down at the beautiful pieces of jewelry Jeno bought you. The necklace is a silver choker, a paperclip-like link type chain with a diamond-encrusted butterfly in the center. The earrings are matching silver hoops with butterflies adorned along the rings of metal, and your jaw drops slightly as you take in the beauty of Jeno’s present.
“You really like it?” he asks excitedly, a hint of worry still in his voice, but when you nod, his brows unfurrow and he smiles widely, relieved. “I saw the set and it reminded me of you. It’s beautiful, classy, and fun.”
You can’t help but smile. “You think I’m classy and fun?”
“Of course,” he answers instantly, and your smile widens as you step closer to him curiously.
“You think I’m beautiful?” you ask with your eyebrows raised, and Jeno visibly swallows.
“I do,” he bashfully agrees, and you coo fondly, wanting nothing more than to set his present down and wrap him in a tight hug. “I really do.”
“Jeno,” you tease playfully, “I’m kinda dying to know what’s in the other box.”
“Oh, yeah!” he exclaims, closing the first box and opening the second as he explains, “I just got them in gold and silver because I know you tend to wear both depending on your mood and your outfit, so I gave you options.”
“Jeno, that is so thoughtful.” you gush appreciatively, and he blushes immediately, cheeks pinking along with the tips of his ears. “I absolutely love them,” you say gratefully, a warm smile curling your lips.
“Thank God,” he sighs with a laugh that you join him in.
“Okay, so… don’t know how I’m gonna top that,” you joke, “but it’s my turn now.”
“You have my undivided attention,” he assures you, and you can’t help but bat your lashes at him slightly.
“I like the idea of that.” you say flirtatiously, and he chuckles, shaking his head in amusement. “Okay, here, we’ll trade and you’ll open.”
“Deal,” he agrees, swapping presents with you. You watch nervously as he unties the ribbon on the white box and lifts the lid. “This looks delicious, holy shit.”
“I made it myself,” you say carefully.
He looks up at you in surprise. “From scratch?”
You nod. “From scratch.”
“That’s amazing,” Jeno marvels. “Isn’t Victoria sponge cake hard to make?”
“Baking is only hard if you can’t follow instructions.” you say with a resolute nod, and Jeno snickers.
“I never thought of you as a rule-follower, if I’m being honest,” he admits.
You shrug. “Rules and instructions are very different to me, but I can be very obedient when I want to be.”
Jeno pauses at that, eyeing you suspiciously. “Oh, yeah? Like when?”
“In the bedroom.” you answer without hesitation, smiling in amusement as Jeno’s eyes widen slightly.
“You never gave off ‘obedient,’ y’know.” Jeno informs you.
“If I can tell you know what you’re doing, I’ll listen to you.” you reply with a nonchalant shrug.
“Yeah? Would you listen to me?” Jeno asks, voice quieter and, if you’re not mistaken, lower than before. There’s a suggestive edge to his voice, playful and flirtatious, but in the way that very much indicates that he’d stop joking in a minute if you were into it.
“Depends,” you answer, smiling up at him. “Do you know what you’re doing in there?”
His responding chuckle is significantly deeper than the ones before it, the sound undeniably attractive as he regards you carefully. “Absolutely.”
“Is that so?” you muse softly, watching him intently. “And I’m supposed to go off of your word?”
“You don’t trust me?” he asks, raising an eyebrow, and you shrug.
“I just tend to learn better from experience.” you reply with a small flirtatious smile that threatens to overtake your whole face.
“Maybe we can arrange that.” he says with a playful grin.
“I’ll keep my schedule open.” you say with a curt nod, and he snorts in amusement.
“Perfect.” he agrees before focusing his attention on the smaller box in his arms. He sets the cake box down on the table by the entryway and unwraps the other, cube-shaped box, his eyes widening with excitement when its contents are revealed to him.
“No way!” he gasps, turning the Big Ben snow globe this way and that.
“I remembered you have a snow globe collection and I thought I could help you add to it.” you explain, and Jeno looks up at you, eyes bright.
“You’re amazing. Thank you so much.” he gushes happily, and you beam at him before waving him off.
“Of course, Jeno. I just wanted you to know I was thinking about you while I was gone.” you say sweetly, and he grins before opening his arms for a hug,
You step into his embrace readily and wrap your arms around his middle, the two of you squeezing each other tightly. When you pull back slightly, you realize Jeno still hasn’t let you go, his arms still securely wrapped around your waist.
“I really missed you, y’know.” Jeno says softly, and your heart warms.
“I missed you too, Jeno. It’s good to be back.” you echo, and he smiles before gently releasing you, his reluctance apparent in the way his fingers linger as they pull away from you. “Oh!” you say, remembering something out of nowhere. “I actually still have to give Winter her present, so I’m gonna track her down and do that.”
“Oh, of course, yeah, go for it. Thank you again—I’m gonna demolish this cake later.” Jeno says, finishing his sentence in a conspiratorial whisper, and you giggle.
“I’m glad. I’ll see you in a bit, yeah?” You reach up and pinch his chin gently, smiling wider when his blush from earlier returns in full force.
Jeno nods shyly, and you release him before venturing further into the party in search of Winter.
Finally spotting Winter across the room on her phone, you cross the living room and tap her shoulder from behind, smiling widely when she turns around.
“Hey!” she greets excitedly, wrapping you in a hug. You two rock from side to side for a moment, hearts full, before you release each other. “What’s up?”
“I just wanted to give you your present,” you say with a small shrug and a smile, and her eyes widen. “It’s nothing crazy!” you warn her, waving your hands dismissively, and she shrugs, reaching out for the gift bag in your hand with opening and closing fists.
“I wanna see! Can I see, please?” Winter pleads, and you give in with a fond laugh, handing over the gift bag.
You wait with bated breath as she opens the present, her eyes softening fondly as she gazes down at the stuffed plushie in her hand.
“It’s so cute! How’d you even find a desert fox plushie?” she asks, in awe as she turns it this way and that.
“I had it commissioned from a toy store boutique only in England,” you explain, and she smiles widely, wrapping you in another tight hug.
“Thank you so much,” she gushes, pulling back from the embrace to clutch her plushie to her chest tightly. “I gotta come up with a name for you, little guy!”
“You do that,” you laugh, moving a stray curl out of her face. “I’m gonna keep making my way through the party.”
“Okay,” she sing-songs. “See you later!”
“See you, babe!” you chirp, waving goodbye before heading back the way you came, deciding to take a detour into the kitchen for more snacks.
You’re barely in there for five minutes, munching happily on salty and sweet snacks alike, before you exit and run almost directly into the chest of someone; the only thing stopping the collision are their quick reflexes as they steady you in place.
“Sorry!” you apologize, stepping back and looking up to your victim before you stop short and a pleased smile curls your lips.
“Hey, you. Was wondering where you’d run off to.” the handsome stranger from earlier says, smiling at you.
“Oh, y’know. Making the rounds, saying hi to everyone. It is my party, after all.” you reply with a secretive smile, and he steps closer with raised eyebrows of intrigue.
“Is that so?” he asks, and you nod, stepping a bit closer to hear him better.
“Mm, yeah,” you hum. “You know what’s weird?”
“What is it?”
“This party is for me, and yet there are people here I’ve never met before,” you muse. “Like you.”
“Maybe it’s a sign you're meant to get to know me.” he suggests with a wry grin, and you roll your eyes with a laugh.
“Good one.” you reply playfully. “So what should we do to get to know each other?” you ask with a playful lilt and feigned curiosity.
“Mm, you could start by telling me more about yourself.” he replies, and you raise your brows.
“‘Myself’ is a very broad topic,” you point out, and he snorts. “Be more specific.”
“Fair, fair.” he agrees with a chuckle. “What are…” he trails off thoughtfully before he perks up again, “your love languages?”
“I feel like this is an unfair advantage sort of question,” you reply with a small pout. (You do not miss the way his gaze softens fondly. Or the way it drops to your lips.) “So, I’ll only answer if you do, too.”
“That’s fair,” he agrees with a smile. “You first, though.”
“Mine are,” you say as you try to recall what the quiz results said the last time you took it, “acts of service, physical touch, and quality time. What about you?”
“Wait, let’s unpack yours first—”
“No, you say yours, then we’ll unpack mine. Fess up, bucko.” you press, poking him gently in the chest.
He laughs at your poke and mini outburst before obliging. “Physical touch,” he murmurs, leaning into your space and smirking slightly when you half-step, half-stumble back, “words of affirmation,” he straightens up and gestures between the two of you casually with a cheeky grin before finishing with, “and quality time.”
“You’re so smooth,” you gush sarcastically, and he snickers.
“Why, thank you. I’d say I try, but then I’d be lying.”
You shoot him a look. “Don’t push it.”
Holding his hands up in surrender, he shrugs. “My bad.”
“As long as you know.” you reply with a sweet smile, and his gaze softens. “What?”
“You’ve got a beautiful smile, you know that?” he murmurs, and your cheeks warm.
“Thanks,” you mumble bashfully, and he coos fondly at you.
“So cute,” he fawns.
You glower at him. “I’m out of here,” you mutter, undeniably flustered and embarrassed about it.
“Aw, come back, cutie—” he slips his fingers around your wrist gently and tugs you closer, smiling when there’s virtually no resistance from your end. “I didn’t mean to make you all nervous,” he apologizes with a playful, teasing lilt that tells you he might not actually be all that sorry.
Turning your nose up, you look away from him even as his hand slips down to let his thumb stroke gently at the back of your hand. At your small intake of breath, he smiles and tugs you even closer—dangerously close, actually—before moving to wrap his hand around the small of your back.
It’s almost as if the Fates themselves decided to intervene, the divine timing is that impeccable.
His phone pings, and he frowns before pulling it out of his back pocket and checking the screen. His face falls visibly and so drastically that it actually hurts you to see for a moment, leading you to avert your gaze politely.
His hand slowly retreats from its original path, and you’re shocked to find that you’re a bit disappointed.
“Do me a small favor? Schedule some time for me later before your busy, busy party ends? I’ll be back.” he says hopefully, squeezing your hand gently before shooting you an apologetic smile and turning to weave between a couple of people before disappearing into the hallway.
You try not to look as disappointed as you feel, but apparently you fail because Seulgi’s by your side moments later from out of virtually nowhere.
“I saw you pouting from all the way across the room,” she chuckles fondly as she strokes your back gently. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m not pouting,” you mumble, and Seulgi raises an eyebrow.
“Tell that to your bottom lip,” she points out, and you tuck it back in with an air of defeat. “Exactly. Now what’s wrong?”
“I was talking to this really cute guy earlier,” you admit with a slowly deepening frown, “but he had to leave really suddenly.”
Seulgi makes a sympathetic hum. “Did you get his name?”
“No!” you complain, and she nods in understanding.
“Well, even if he had to leave, he might come to another party in the future—because he clearly knows someone here, you know?”
“What’s wrong?” Chaewon asks, a tipsy Winter in tow.
“How do you know something’s wrong?” you ask, confused.
“You’re pouting,” Chaewon points out, and you splutter, bewildered.
“I’m not!” you exclaim defensively, and Winter winces sympathetically.
“You are.” she confirms, reaching out and unceremoniously poking your bottom lip before giggling to herself.
“She’s mad her party crush pulled a Cinderella and dipped on her,” Seulgi explains.
“Ah,” Chaewon and Winter both say sympathetically.
“That sucks,” Winter sighs. “Speaking of cute guys disappearing—has anyone seen my boyfriend anywhere?”
“What’s he wearing?” you ask, and Winter moves to answer before Chaewon unknowingly cuts her off.
“It’s so weird that you and Haechan have been at this party for so long and have yet to run into each other.” Chaewon marvels aloud, and you shrug casually.
“I probably walked by him or something and just didn’t know,” you brush it off, and Chaewon nods thoughtfully.
“Walked by who and didn’t know?” Yunjin asks from behind you, and when you turn to face her, she frowns. “Why are you pouting?”
“Mother of God—” you huff, crossing your arms, and Yunjin winces.
“Jeez, tough crowd.” she chuckles. “Walked by who and didn’t know?” she presses.
“Haechan,” you explain, and her brows furrow together in confusion, but she doesn’t say anything.
“Oh,” is all she says after a moment. “Wait, can you, um, come help me with something in the bathroom?” she asks you, eyes concerningly piercing.
“Sure,” you mumble, definitely confused but picking up on her sense of urgency.
“We’ll be right back,” Yunjin explains, tugging you away. “Roommate problems!” she calls over her shoulder, and you grimace to really sell the direness of the situation.
You let her tug you into the bathroom towards the back of the apartment by Seulgi’s and Chaewon’s bedrooms, and she sits you down on the toilet before taking a deep breath.
“I don’t exactly know how to tell you this, but I was trying to find you earlier before this spiraled out of control.” she starts.
“You’re scaring me,” you complain, and she shushes you as she unlocks her phone and starts searching for something.
“You did meet Haechan, actually, but I have a feeling no one told you that you met Haechan.” Yunjin says finally, and you think back to the very small amount of people you met for the first time today, pondering over who it might be before Yunjin turns her phone to show you the screen, and—
“Fuck.” you mumble hoarsely, and Yunjin nods slightly before closing her phone on the screen she’s just showed you of a photo of your friend group, presumably from when you were abroad, where Winter is sitting happily on the lap of— “that’s the stranger I was talking to.” you say sadly. “My party crush.”
“Did he ever say his name?” she asks, and you think back, growing increasingly more irritated when you realize—
“No,” you mutter bitterly, “he must have conveniently forgotten to share that part.”
“Can I say something?” Yunjin says carefully, and you nod solemnly. “I saw you two staring at each other before he followed you into the kitchen.” Your blood runs cold, and it must show on your face, because she quickly adds, “I’m not mad at you, and I’m not going to tell anyone. I’m just gonna warn you, because that staring contest was intense, and I don’t know what happened in that kitchen—I don’t want to!” she says suddenly, putting her hand up to silence you as you move to speak before slowly continuing with, “I just know none of that can happen in front of Winter, so it shouldn’t happen at all.”
“Agreed.” you sigh sadly. “Yeah. I mean, I’m pissed as hell, and I might maim him the next time I see him, but other than that, I guess I’m fine.”
“I mean. yeah. Definitely agree with maiming him, actually.” she agrees after a moment of thought. “Just do something subtle and easy to explain away.”
You smile at her, your spirits lifted slightly. “You’re the best.”
“Love you, girl.” she says sincerely, bending down to hug you before helping you to your feet. “I got your back.”
You head back out there with no pout in sight, only a deceptive smile as you plan your revenge.
It’s not long before the not-so-mysterious stranger comes back around, by which time you’ve fully worked yourself up into a huff about the situation once more, crossing your arms, leaning against the wall, and eyeing him disapprovingly as he approaches.
“Why so serious?” he jokes, and you raise an eyebrow.
“At what point were you going to tell me you’re dating Winter?” you ask, deciding to get right to the point, and he freezes, shock on his face. “Yeah.”
“I’m sorry,” he says immediately.
“For what?” you test him, and he frowns deeply.
“For hiding that from you.” he sighs, and you huff as he continues, “I just really wanted to get to know you, and I felt like I had to hide that because you knowing would ruin it!”
You look at him with an eyebrow raised pointedly. “And what would you call this?”
His frown turns to a petulant pout. “Ruined?” he asks.
“Ding, ding, ding,” you say sarcastically before turning to leave.
“Wait, I’m— I’m really sorry,” he pleads, catching your hand before you can slip away. “Can we start over a little bit?”
“How are we gonna start over a little bit?” you ask skeptically, and he stands up straighter, tugging you a bit closer before smiling hopefully and releasing your hand to wave in greeting.
“Hi, I’m Haechan, Winter’s boyfriend,” he introduces himself as he offers his hand to shake. As you take it, he gently urges you closer with a testing tug before adding, “and I think you’re beautiful.”
“Haechan!” you whisper, half-laughing in surprise, and he shrugs with a sheepish grin.
“Figured I’d lay all my cards out on the table this time.”
“Kinda ballsy, no?” you raise your eyebrows, crossing your arms, and he chuckles.
“I’m a pretty ballsy guy.”
You eye him up and down before tilting your head to the side and saying, “I’m sure.”
“So am I forgiven?” he asks hopefully.
“For now,” you reply after a moment of thinking, and continue at the sight of his excited smile, “but I’m watching you.”
“I’d be upset if you weren’t.” he murmurs, and you roll your eyes with a laugh.
It doesn’t take long for your one-sided animosity to dissipate as you and Haechan manage to fall into a normal enough conversation about your activities in Oxford. At one point, the familiar but unpleasant smell of weed filters into your senses, making you subconsciously wrinkle your nose in distaste.
Haechan raises an eyebrow, amused. “You alright?”
“You don’t smell that?” you ask, and he sniffs the air before he chuckles.
“I’m guessing you’re not much of a smoker?” he speculates.
You shake your head, tipping your head back to swallow the rest of your drink. “Definitely not.” You lick your lips to clean up the remnants of your drink, and barely stifle the laugh that bubbles up when you notice Haechan watching your mouth with both entirely rapt attention and a slightly dazed expression. “See something you like?”
“Sure do,” he breathes, and you yelp, swatting his arm lightly. “You asked!”
“As a joke!”
“Well, sorry for failing to read the room properly. I was a little, um, distracted.”
“Haechan.”
“Hm?”
“Stop staring at my lips.”
“What if I don’t?” he asks, stepping closer to you slowly. “Hm?”
“You’re awfully bold for a guy who’s dating one of my friends.” you murmur back, and he shrugs, smiling flirtatiously.
“I know what I want.” he answers casually, and the resolve in his voice takes you by surprise, leaving you to swallow a growing lump in your throat.
“I’m, uh,” you stammer, looking around for something, anything, that can save you from his intense attention. “I’m gonna go see if they want snacks,” you finally answer pathetically, and he doesn’t buy it for a minute, a smug grin curling his lips before he nods, seemingly complying.
He waits for you to move past him, staying perfectly still and therefore forcing you to squeeze between him and the counter, and head towards the living room before he’s so close behind you that he’s practically on you and only then does he reply, a smile audible in his voice as he murmurs, “Let’s go, then.”
“Hi, my dear friends. Are we having a good time?” you ask as you re-enter the living room and scan over each of your friends, all sitting in a circle with Yunjin’s infamous hot pink bong placed carefully in her lap. The party continues on around them, people only sparing cursory glances at the very occupied couch and nearby seating of Seulgi’s and Chaewon’s living room, but you couldn’t care less about the other guests, instead focusing your attention on your seven cross-faded friends.
Yunjin, ever the lightweight, looks up at you with red-rimmed, half-lidded eyes and a dopey smile. “Never better.”
“I actually just want to say that I missed you so much,” Chaewon sniffles, hurriedly wiping away a tear before looking up at you earnestly. “I’m so happy you’re back.”
“I missed you, too!” you reply, touched, and she sniffles loudly, the tip of her nose pinking in that signature way that lets you know more tears are en route whether she likes it or not.
“I’m not gonna lie, yo,” Mark mumbles, rubbing a hand over his face and looking over at you. “I’m about to be starving.”
“‘About to be starving’ is crazy, actually.” you snicker, and Mark joins in your laughter, his laugh bubbling up inside of him almost uncontrollably.
“Well, you know how it goes; we smoke, we get high, we get the munchies.” Mark explains, and you nod in understanding.
“Mark… I went to England for a study abroad program… not to get a lobotomy.” you say slowly, and he snorts loudly in surprise and amusement. “I remember what happens when y’all get high.” you remind him, and he lifts his hands up in surrender, nodding back at you with a grin. “Do you guys want food from the deli down the block?”
“Yes!” The resounding chorus of assent from all your high friends actually takes you by surprise, sending you stepping back in shock only to stumble directly into Haechan’s chest. He steadies you instantly, hands gripping your shoulders securely, and quietly double-checks with you to make sure you’re actually sturdy before releasing you.
You hate that you found his touch comforting for even a second, trying your best internally to squash the initial attraction you had to him as you attempt to focus on the task at hand.
“Okay, sounds good to me. Can y’all just type your names and what you want in my Notes app?” you ask, unlocking your phone, opening the Notes app, and passing your phone to Yunjin. As your phone makes its way around the circle, you turn slightly to face Haechan, who’s already watching you with an unnerving level of intensity.
“Haechan, why don’t you go with her?” Seulgi suggests, completely missing the warning glare you send her way. “She can’t carry all of that by herself.”
“Yeah, sure, no problem.” he agrees easily, and you purse your lips for a moment, breathing in deeply before turning fully so you’re face-to-face with Haechan. “Looks like we’re gonna spend some more one-on-one time together.” he says with a secretive smile, and you swallow hard, not knowing what to expect from this little excursion.
Your phone eventually makes its way back to you and you look over the orders before putting your phone in your back pocket and heading to grab your coat, Haechan following diligently behind you.
“Okay, we’ll be back soon! Try to hang in there, guys.” you announce, stepping out of the apartment and holding the door open for Haechan, who exits and shuts it behind himself.
As you two make your way down the hall to the elevator, he speeds up slightly so he’s walking in front of you before turning fully around to face you, taking smooth backwards strides down the hall.
“Can I help you with something?” you ask, confused, and he shakes his head with a smile.
“Don’t mind me.” he replies, and you snort in amusement.
“Kinda hard not to mind you when you seem hellbent on staring holes into my face.” you mutter as you press the elevator button.
“Not my fault you’re nice to look at.” he defends himself, and you look over at him instantly, shock written all over your face. “What’s wrong? Surely you’ve heard that about yourself before.”
“I sure have,” you agree readily, sighing in relief when the elevator door opens. Stepping in, you add, “I just haven’t heard it from the mouth of my friend’s boyfriend.”
“Ah, well.” He follows you into the elevator and shrugs with a “what can you do?” type of smile, making you narrow your eyes. “First time for everything, yeah?”
“Yeah…” you reply slowly, regarding him suspiciously. “Let’s try and make that first time the last time, okay?”
“No promises.” he murmurs, a smile audible in his voice. When you look over at him, he winks at you so quickly you almost think you imagined it, and you jolt, making a noise of bewilderment that sounds embarrassingly close to a mix of a squawk or squeak before turning to face forward again.
The weather actually feels quite nice, you realize when you both get outside, a light, cool breeze filtering through the trees, and you and Haechan walk alongside each other for the first two, maybe three minutes in silence before he breaks it.
“Can I ask you a question?” Haechan asks, looking over at you as you two walk to the deli.
“Depends… is it weird?” you return his question with another question, and he chuckles, shaking his head.
“Don’t think so.”
“Okay, then shoot.”
“I noticed your reaction to the smell of the weed smoke earlier,” he recalls, and you hum in acknowledgement. “Do you not smoke?”
“Not at all,” you reply, and he nods in understanding. “I don’t do any drugs.”
“Me either,” he replies, and a mildly surprised smile makes its way to your lips. “Can I ask if you have a reason for never wanting to try anything?”
You’re silent for a moment as you attempt to find the right words to explain yourself and Haechan waits patiently, the two of you walking in a comfortable silence before you break it. “I don’t like the feeling of not being in control of myself.” you say carefully, and he gives you an emphatic nod that piques your curiosity. “You too?”
“Somewhat, yeah, but I was mainly nodding because I completely get it. For me, I don’t like moving any slower than usual or feeling restricted in any way.”
“That makes perfect sense, too.” you say, giving him a firm, approving nod of your own, and he chuckles quietly. “I’ve always wondered about what it might be like to just… mellow out and calm down, y’know?”
“Definitely,” he agrees. “They usually get so… happy.”
“Exactly! Well, except for when Chaewon starts crying out of nowhere.” you add.
Haechan laughs. “Yeah, I don’t know what that’s about.”
“That’s another thing, too.” you say, starting to feel more comfortable talking about it to someone who understands. “I feel like some drugs—especially, like, weed, LSD, acid, shrooms, and stuff like that—they tend to bring out, like, parts of your subconscious that are typically hidden away.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard about that and I’ve definitely seen it happen,” Haechan says, sounding surprisingly solemn.
“Yeah, so… whatever’s going on under the surface in here,” you say, tapping your temple, “is none of my business.” you finish with a resolute nod, making Haechan snicker. “I will simply continue raw-dogging life on this bitch of an earth.”
“That’s so real.” Haechan says through his laughter, making you smile.
“Thank you!” you chirp. “Also, when you say you don’t like moving slower or feeling restricted, do you mean in a physical or mental sense? Or is it both?”
“Hmm,” Haechan hums thoughtfully. “Definitely both. I just feel like… I would describe myself and my lifestyle as somewhat fast-paced, y’know? Like, not really very sedentary, I’m always on the move, and if I’m high off of, like, weed or something, I feel like all I’d be able to do is… vegetate… and I hate the thought of that.”
“That’s so real,” you say, echoing Haechan’s earlier statement. “Well, you know, if you want to move faster, there’s always cocaine,” you joke, and he snorts loudly, clearly not expecting your comment.
“I definitely wouldn’t try cocaine,” he laughs, shaking his head. “I can just imagine my poor mom if I came to visit her one day and I was all strung out and tweaking.”
“Aw, are you a mama’s boy?” you ask teasingly, nudging him with your shoulder.
“Maybe a little bit, yeah,” he admits with a shy smile, and you grin.
“That’s sweet.” you assure him, and he visibly relaxes, laughing with an air of bashfulness. “We’re here, by the way!” you point out, gesturing to the deli less than thirty feet away at the end of the block.
Haechan jogs slightly ahead of you, opening the door and holding it for you to enter.
“Thank you,” you say with a grateful smile as you step inside. The smell of the deli is delicious, the scents of various foods being cooked wafting through the air, and for a moment you half-expect to start floating involuntarily towards the tastiest smelling dish.
“Okay, let’s get these orders in,” you mutter to yourself before making your way over to where the grill cooks are stationed. “Hi, how are you feeling tonight?” you greet politely, exchanging brief pleasantries before continuing on with, “I actually have a pretty big order I’d like to place with sandwiches and sides, but I don’t mind waiting if I have to!”
“Go ahead, miss,” one of the cooks says, and you look down at your phone before starting to read off the orders.
Haechan stands off to the side and watches on as you rattle off the nine different sandwich and side order combos to the cooks, who nod and start to prepare them. When you’re finished, you turn to face Haechan and smile sweetly before leading him towards the drinks and snacks.
“Okay, can you help me carry these to the front?” you ask Haechan.
“Of course, yeah,” he answers, and you start to hand him various drinks and snacks off of the note everyone wrote in.
“Okay, a raspberry peach Snapple for me… a Redbull for you—wait, Haechan, you like Redbull but you won’t try cocaine…? Seems fake,” you comment, and Haechan lets out a shocked laugh before raising his hands—well, he’s holding a drink in each hand, so fists—in surrender.
“Take it easy on me!” he begs jokingly, and you pretend to think about it before relenting with a smile and continuing to collect the drinks.
“Mountain Dew for Seulgi… Sprite for Jeno… oop, and a Sprite for Chenle, too… root beer for Winter… blue Gatorade for Mark… Arizona raspberry iced tea for Yunjin, and finally, that XXX Vitamin Water that Chaewon’s always raving about.” You close the refrigerator door with your hip, the two of you carefully carrying your armfuls of beverages to the counter.
“I never got the Vitamin Water hype.” Haechan admits.
“It’s essentially juice, but like water with a splash of juice, maybe two if you’re lucky.” you say. “At least, that’s what I think, but some of them do actually taste pretty good, too.”
“Hm,” he remarks thoughtfully. “I don’t know, I just never got into it.”
“You got into that Redbull pretty easily though, huh?” you tease, and he laughs, his cheeks pinking ever so slightly, and you’re glad he’s looking away so he can’t see how blatantly you paused to look at him.
“Miss, some of your order is ready!” One of the cooks calls out to you, and you shoot them a thumbs up as they bring two sandwiches and a couple of trays to the counter for you. “Do you want to pay now or when we’re finished preparing everything?”
“Oh, I can pay now! Just let me go get the chips and stuff.” you say before whizzing off to where the snacks are, returning shortly after with Seulgi’s Takis and Chenle’s red Doritos and placing them on the counter triumphantly.
The worker manning the register rings your stuff up and reads you out the total, to which you respond by pulling out your phone to tap the card reader, but Haechan calls your name before you can complete the transaction, making you look over at him in confusion.
“I got it,” he offers, reaching for the card reader with his own phone only for you to shoot him a funny look and nudge his phone out of the way to finish paying with your own phone.
“You didn’t have to pay for it, Haechan,” you assure him. “Think of it as the small fee I had to pay for disappearing from the country for about half of a year.”
“Yeah, but I was being a gentleman.” he protests with a frown.
“It’s okay! Be a gentleman to your girlfriend—not me.” you say with expectantly raised brows.
“I’m trying to impress you, though,” he points out, and you roll your eyes.
“Read the room, maybe?” you chuckle, and he scrunches his nose up in distaste. “Something wrong?”
“I’m not much of a reader.” he replies with a dismissive shrug, and you raise your eyebrows.
“I’m a librarian.” you remind him. “My job is literally all about reading.”
“On second thought,” Haechan blurts out, “I literally read every day, all the time.” When you snicker in amusement, he grins and continues with, “I’m being so serious. I’ve read every bottle of shampoo and body wash in my shower front to back!” he presses, and you burst into laughter.
“You’re ridiculous.” you giggle as you recover from your laughing fit, and he grins shamelessly.
“I made you laugh, though,” he points out with a smug little grin. “So you kinda like it.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you lie with a sniff, looking away.
“You think I’m funny,” he teases, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively as he gets closer. “And if earlier was any indication, you think I’m attractive.”
“Where are you going with this?” you say with a roll of your eyes.
“You like me.” he replies simply, and you choke on your spit.
“Two fairly objective observations are not an indication of me liking you.” you splutter indignantly, and Haechan raises his brow.
“Being attractive is objective now?” he asks skeptically, and you glare at him, turning to the row of deli cooks pretending not to be watching your conversation intently.
“Is he a handsome guy?” you ask them, and they all look between each other with confusion and mild discomfort. “Literally no homo. Please relax. Is he a handsome guy or is he an uggo?” you emphasize, and one of them snorts.
“He’s definitely not ugly, no,” one of the cooks pipes up, and they all nod in agreement. “Handsome guy, actually.”
“Good bone structure,” the cook beside him adds, and you could swear Haechan starts to blush. “Yeah, he’s a good looking dude.”
“Sí, muy guapo.” A cook you can’t even see chimes in, and you and Haechan look at each other, bewildered.
“How many of you are back there?” Haechan asks as he chuckles nervously.
“No te preocupes, amigo.” the same cook says, still concealed from view. “Eres guapísimo.”
“Thank you, guys.” you reply gratefully before turning to stick your tongue out at Haechan triumphantly.
To your surprise, his gaze darkens. “Do that again.”
“No, I’m good.” you reply immediately, fixing your face and turning away from him. “Little freak.”
“Mm, maybe a little bit.” he hums, and you grimace.
“Yuck.” you mutter, narrowing your eyes in his direction. “Get a grip. As I was saying, me finding you funny or attractive has nothing to do with liking you.”
“Why wouldn’t you, though?” he presses, and you let out an exasperated sigh before turning fully to face him.
“You have a girlfriend!” you whisper-shout, confused even further by the way he looks at you, smug and unimpressed.
“So that’s the only thing stopping you?” he says slowly, and you pause as you realize what you’ve admitted to.
“It’s the only thing that matters.” you huff with an air of finality, and Haechan just chuckles, stepping closer.
“Not this? Hm? Not how good—no—how right this feels?” he murmurs suggestively, and you shake your head firmly.
“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” you mutter, and he scoffs in disbelief.
“Are you really gonna keep playing dumb?”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” you sing-song, and he rolls his eyes.
“Sure.” he murmurs, amused.
Desperate to change the topic, you look around, your eyes landing on the bags of food on the countertop.
“Man, those fries smell so good,” you groan, staring enviously at the bag containing Winter’s order of curly fries.
“Mm, yeah?” Haechan hums, looking from the bag to you. He puts a finger to his lips in a shushing gesture and pops open the plastic container. He pulls out a small handful of Winter’s curly fries, about as much as he can fit between his thumb and forefinger, and grins at you, winking before popping one in his mouth.
He reaches his hand out, offering you one of his stolen goods, and you hesitate for a second before deciding to reach forward and take the proffered curly fry. As you chew it, your eyes roll back into your head in ecstasy, the fried good the perfect amount of salty, crunchy, and warm.
“Thank you,” you say gratefully, and he waves you off dismissively.
“You’re welcome,” he replies. “It’s our little secret, okay?”
“Jeez, I just met you tonight and you’re already trusting me with secrets?” you chuckle, and he shrugs.
“Well, should I not trust you?” he asks curiously, and you shake your head instantly in disagreement.
“You can trust me, don’t worry.” you assure him, and he smiles widely, nodding slowly in understanding.
“Great.”
“The real question is if I can trust you,” you continue, and he chuckles.
“You can,” he says confidently, and you raise your eyebrows skeptically.
“How do I know I can trust that?” you ask, and he laughs, rolling his eyes slightly as he leans closer to you conspiratorially.
“That’s just a risk you’re gonna have to take.”
“No, thanks. I’m not big on risks.” you admit.
Haechan tilts his head to the side curiously. “You don’t take any risks?”
You pause to think about it, thoughts racing back to earlier when you made the mental pact with yourself to be more daring and take more risks. “Not really, no. Unless you count letting Yunjin drive.”
He snorts. “I’m talking big risks.”
You stare at him blankly. “Have you ever been in the car with Yunjin?”
Chuckling and shaking his head slightly, he says, “I have.”
“It’s pretty risky.”
“I’m talking about different risks, though. Think harder.” he presses.
You sigh loudly but oblige, thinking about it again. “I guess studying abroad in Oxford felt pretty risky… I was essentially all alone on the other side of the world.”
He shakes his head. “Bigger,” he explains. “I’m talking about something that,” his gaze slowly falls to your lips and he continues, “could go really wrong.”
It feels like he’s hinting at something, and you’re not sure you want to find out.
“Truthfully, I don’t get why I would take risks like those.” you say with a pensive frown, and he smiles, eyes still trained on your mouth with an unmistakable fascination as he steps closer to you, practically cornering you against the snack rack behind you, and if he hears your squeak of alarm, he chooses not to comment.
“It’s about the reward,” he murmurs, his tongue slipping out to wet his lips slowly. “People take risks because they think that the reward is worth it in comparison to what could go wrong.”
“Well, I don’t think most risks I can think of off of the top of my head are worth it,” you say with a stumped pout.
“I can think of one I wanna take right now,” he hums softly, reaching up to rest one hand on the rack behind you, and you balk, finally starting to understand what he’s been hinting at.
“I, um, think that might be too risky.” you reply cautiously, and he chuckles quietly.
“I disagree,” he says plainly. “I think it’d be so worth it.” he breathes out, his gentle breath fanning over your lips, the minty scent tempting you more than you’d like to admit.
“If you try and kiss me right now,” you say quietly, “I will bite your lip until it bleeds.”
He snickers and nods in understanding. “Understood.”
“Is that risk worth it now?” you ask wryly, and he bites back a laugh.
“I don’t know, let me find out.” he says, leaning in closer, and you yelp, pushing his chest reflexively and, when he barely budges, clapping a hand over your mouth and glaring at him as he laughs loudly. “Man, you’re cute.”
“Shut up,” you mutter contritely, moving your hand away when he relents and steps back. “Let’s not ask why I don’t feel comfortable taking risks and ask, instead, why you—” you poke his chest accusingly, “feel so comfortable being so reckless.”
He shrugs nonchalantly, explaining, “I don’t think it’s that I’m reckless—”
“Yeah, right.” you mutter.
He ignores you. “I think it’s that I want to know what it feels like to truly live.” he finishes, and you pause at that, genuinely taking in his words. “Life is too short to be scared to indulge, you know?”
“Well,” you say slowly, thoughtfully, “I guess that makes sense.”
His eyes widen slightly in surprise. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. Maybe I could stand to live a little more,” you ponder, noticing the way his eyes drift down to your lips once more and quickly adding, “but that doesn’t mean you can kiss me. I’ll still bite you.”
“Oh, yeah?” he asks softly, teasingly, and you nod. “What if I said I kinda like it a little rough?”
“I’d say you’re in the wrong relationship.” you blurt out before you can stop yourself, and Haechan’s eyes widen as he points at you with a bright, triumphant grin. “I’m joking! I’m joking.”
“I don’t think you are.” he replies smugly.
“Oh, brother.”
“You think I’m in the wrong relationship?” he presses, and you shake your head vehemently, desperately trying to cover your tracks.
“Only because Winter is not a ‘likes it a little rough’ kind of girl,” you explain quickly.
He nods in agreement. “This is true.” he admits, and you relax slightly, glad he gets your point. “So, who would be the right relationship for me, hm?” he teases, and you groan loudly, tipping your head back in exasperation. “Got any ideas?”
“Nope.” you answer flatly.
He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, leaning closer. “You sure about that?”
“Miss, the rest of your order is ready!” One of the cooks calls out, and you pounce on the interruption eagerly.
“Thank you!” you call back to the cooks before turning to Haechan with a relieved smile. “You know what? We’d better go back before they put out a Missing Persons report for us.” you dodge his taunting question from earlier and carefully remove yourself from your very compromising position, walking towards the counter of the bodega to collect the bags of food. “Are you coming or what?” you huff, attempting to conceal how flustered his previous line of questioning has left you by placing a hand on your hip impatiently.
He shakes his head with a chuckle, but meets you by the door, slipping his fingers in the loops of the numerous bags weighing down your index and middle fingers to relieve you of the burden. He leans forward, opening the door for you and gesturing for you to exit first. “You’re lucky I don’t want to hear any of them complain about their food being cold, because I could do this—” he gestures between the two of you, “all night and then some.”
“That’s great, Casanova,” you drawl, pointing ahead of you down the street towards where you’re heading. “Now walk.”
As you two walk back from the bodega, you can’t help but notice that Haechan’s path keeps veering slightly off-course, the male repeatedly bumping into you as you two walk.
“You good?” you ask finally after what must be the eighth mini-collision, and Haechan chuckles, albeit somewhat sheepishly as he brings a hand up to rub the back of his neck. “Is there a reason why you keep bumping into me? Are the bags throwing you off-balance or something?”
“Would you, uh, believe me if I said that I just like you and want to be close to you?” he answers, and you stop short, blinking at him impassively which causes him to stop walking as well.
“Bold words for someone with a whole girlfriend back at the party.” you reply with a dismissive snort, and he shrugs.
“I don’t know what it is,” he says as you two slowly fall back into a comfortable pace. “I think we’d be good together.”
“Haechan,” you warn.
“You fascinate me,” he admits plainly, staring at your face openly. “I wanna get to know you better.”
“Mm, I don’t know about that,” you say apprehensively.
“I’m gonna learn about you eventually, because I’m not going anywhere.” he replies confidently. “I’m gonna learn everything about you—your hopes, your dreams, your fears—” he leans closer so his breath hits your cheek and continues, “what makes you tick.”
“Well, you wanna know something?” you offer, and he nods instantly, leaning towards you in anticipation. “Something that makes me tick is when guys with girlfriends hit on me very blatantly.”
“Ah, I see,” Haechan remarks thoughtfully. “So I should be more subtle.”
“I—well—no, that’s not really what I meant.”
“Well, what did you mean?”
“Stop saying flirtatious things!”
“So you want me to stop saying flirtatious things—”
”Yes, that’s quite literally what I just said—”
“—and start doing flirtatious things.”
Your mouth snaps shut and you stare at him incredulously. “Not even remotely what I meant.”
“No, I think that’s what you were hinting at.”
“You’re unbelievable.”
“You’d better believe it, baby.”
“Calling me ‘baby’ when you have a whole girlfriend is crazy, by the way.”
“Maybe I’m crazy. Did you think about that?”
“Clearly. I’ll let Winter know her boyfriend is actually an escapee from the insane asylum and she’ll just dump you.”
“So you can have me all to yourself… I like it.” He grins, and you open and close your mouth repeatedly, at a loss for words.
“Where are you hearing these things? Haechan, do you often hear things other people don’t?” you ask with patronizing concern, and he bursts out laughing. “It’s not funny, actually! Maybe I will tell Winter after all.”
“She won’t do anything,” he replies through his laughter.
“You’re right.” you agree in disappointment. “Poor girl. She’d probably think she can fix you.”
“I know what could fix me,” he says, fixing you in place with a serious stare.
“Haechan, you’re kinda scaring me.”
“Relax, it’s nothing crazy.”
“You’re not exactly what I’d consider a good judge of what’s crazy or not.”
“I just want your number, God.”
“Oh!” you reply, relieved, and an equally relieved smile appears on his face. “You’re not getting that.”
“Aw, come on!” he whines, leaning on you dramatically. “How am I supposed to get to know you?”
“Through speaking to me in person?”
“So you wanna see me… in person…” he trails off with a suggestive lilt to his voice, wiggling his eyebrows, and you suck your teeth. “If you like me, you can just say that, you know. I won’t tell.”
“You really are crazy.” you marvel, and he grins over at you.
“Is that… intrigue I detect in your voice?” he teases, and you balk.
“No?” you reply a bit too quickly, and his eyes light up.
“You’re intrigued by me!”
“I just wanna know how and where Winter found your crazy ass!”
“So you can go there and get yourself another me?” he replies, and you groan, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Hate to break it to you, princess, but there’s only one of me.”
“Thank God for that.” you mutter under your breath. “So, do you have, like, a mute button or something?”
“I’ll shut up for the rest of the walk back if you give me your number.” he says with a mischievous smile, and you roll your eyes, Haechan’s ever-so-keen eyes noticing your hesitation. “You’re totally thinking about it.”
“I really want you to stop before you get one or both of us in trouble.”
“I will be as quiet as a street rat if you give me your number and don’t block me before I can text you.”
“Damn, how’d you know I was gonna do that?”
“I know the signs of someone playing hard to get.” he says proudly, and you snort.
“I’m not playing hard to get, Haechan. You’re playing hard to get rid of.”
“And I’m gonna play until I win. Now—your number, please.” He smiles dazzlingly at you, pulling out his phone from his back pocket and handing it to you.
You stare at his unlocked phone then at his twinkling, hopeful eyes before sighing in defeat and taking the phone from his hand to enter your number.
“Hell yeah!” Haechan cheers, and you shoot him a judgmental stare.
“Ground rules.” you say plainly, and he nods, instantly attentive. He is cute, you think reluctantly, especially like this as he hangs on your every word like a puppy. “No texting me suggestive photos.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Keep the texts harmless.” you warn him, and he nods in agreement.
“You got it.”
“And don’t call or FaceTime unless it’s an absolute emergency.” you finish, and he scrunches his face up in confusion.
“What if the emergency is that I want to see you or hear your voice?”
“Absolutely bonkers thing to say with a girlfriend, by the way.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“I have Instagram… just look at my pictures or something, I don’t know.”
“What if I want to see you right then exactly how you are?”
“That’s too bad.”
“Fine,” he huffs, and you already know this is going to be a bad decision. “What exactly constitutes an emergency?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. If you were injured or in danger or something and no one else was picking up?”
“Okay…” he trails off skeptically.
“Even then, though, I think you should just call emergency services.”
“You’re brutal,” Haechan remarks in awe. “I like it.”
“Watch it!”
“Watching,” he replies smoothly, grinning in your direction, and you turn to face forward quickly, hoping he didn’t catch your smile. “I saw that.”
“You saw nothing.”
“You smiled. You like me—at least a little bit!”
“First you’re hearing things, and now you’re seeing things? Maybe we should get you checked out.”
“…We?” he points out with a sly smirk, and you roll your eyes as you trudge ahead and up to the apartment building, repeatedly (and with an air of impatience) buzzing the intercom to be let in.
“Thank God we’re back.”
“Since when was the museum so damn expensive?” Chenle mutters in awe as he forks over the thirty dollars for the admission fee.
“It’s the price of knowledge,” Yunjin sighs with a shrug as she takes Chenle’s place at the ticket till and hands the attendant three $10 bills.
“Psst,” Haechan whispers to get your attention, and you turn your head slightly to see he’s leaning towards you. “This is enough to radicalize me,” Haechan huffs bitterly before releasing Winter’s hand and stepping forward to pay. You notice with a curious tilt of your head that he’s taken longer than the rest of your friends so far, despite using Apple Pay, but you don’t think much of it until he’s walked away with Winter and it’s your turn at the register, where the attendant hands you a ticket with a smile.
“Oh, I didn’t pay yet—”
“The gentleman before you paid for your ticket,” she explains with a small nod, and you pause, mentally buffering before smiling at the attendant, taking the ticket, and walking to join your group.
When you meet up with them, Haechan already has his eyes trained in your direction, his left eyelid dropping down into a secretive wink before he grins at you.
“You’re too much,” you mouth at him, walking up beside him to nudge him with your shoulder surreptitiously. He lets out a small chuckle and shrugs as casually as he can before he tickles the palm of your hand with his fingers in a gesture that has you wondering if he plans to hold both your hand and his girlfriend’s. Before the thought can gain much traction, however, the tour guide for your group appears and introduces herself as she passes out museum maps to everyone in your party.
After introducing herself, she takes you through a corridor to the Egyptian art section, walking you by a preserved tomb and detailing funeral processions and Egyptian customs. The guide herself is very engaging and the artwork is fascinating, but you actually came on a mission to see certain wings of the museum. As she walks you through the Egyptian art wing, you consult your map, trying to see if there’s a point coming up where you can casually separate from the group.
Initially, you were following after the tour guide, but now you’re admittedly starting to fall towards the back of the group due to your lack of interest in this particular time period, when the exhibit at the end of the hallway you just passed catches your eye.
You look around you to see if anyone in your tour group is around, observing that the coast is clear before you attempt to break off from your group and do your own thing.
“And where are you sneaking off to?” Haechan’s voice appears out of seemingly nowhere, making you gasp as you whip your head around to look at him.
“Why?” you ask, furrowing your brows. “Are you gonna snitch on me for leaving?”
“I’m not snitching,” he promises you, and you relax slightly before he continues with, “I’m coming.”
You stop short and look at him like he’s grown a second head. “You seem to be mistaken.”
“Definitely not that,” Haechan assures you, and you roll your eyes before quickly turning to leave. He catches up with you easily, making you huff quietly in frustration, and continues to attempt to persuade you, saying, “You need someone with you in case you get lost.”
“Haechan, if I’m with someone and I’m lost, then I’m pretty sure they’re as good as lost too.” you explain slowly, and Haechan pauses to think, leaving you the open opportunity to slip away from him yet again.
He manages to find you yet again, grinning triumphantly when he does, and argues, “I think you should travel with someone—like me—who has a map.”
“Haechan, I am quite literally holding the map they just gave me.” you remind him, and he seems to buffer in real-time, lips parting to form a shocked little “O” shape that is, for all its silliness, stupidly attractive on him.
You’ll give it to him; he’s definitely not lacking in the looks department.
“Well—haven’t you ever heard of the buddy system? There’s safety in numbers, y’know.” Haechan catches up with you once more as you speed walk down a mostly empty hallway.
“Oh, my God, fine.” you whisper-yell exasperatedly. “Fine, you can come with me.”
He perks up immediately, smiling brightly and you can see his body relax as you gradually slow your pace into a comfortable stroll so he can fall into stride with you.
“Great,” he says happily. “Where are we going first?”
“Well, I really want to see the Greek sculptures…” you half-say, half-suggest hopefully.
“Okay, sounds great; let’s go!”
“Haechan.”
“Mhm?”
“Can you walk faster, please? I’m not trying to lose a whole person in the Met.” you complain, stopping in your tracks and turning around to let Haechan catch up to you. The section you’re passing through is packed, the room filled with the din of various animated conversations all overlapping one another.
“Sorry, I’m just taking in all the art in front of me,” he replies, and your expression softens as you remember that this is, in fact, a museum exhibit you’re standing in and not merely a hallway to where you want to go.
“Yeah, the paintings are beautiful,” you agree, and he looks over at you with a confused look.
“Oh—yeah, the paintings are cool, too.” he answers unconvincingly, and you stare at him expressionlessly.
“What were you looking at if not the paintings?” you ask, confused, and he looks you up and down pointedly as if to answer your question. “You’re ridiculous,” you groan, turning to walk away.
“Oh, come on, you can’t blame me! You in that outfit is a goddamn masterpiece.” he defends himself, and you just sigh loudly as you keep walking.
“Keep up!” you quip, and he catches up to you, leaning down slightly so his lips are by your ear.
“Don’t even get me started on this cute little skirt you’ve got on,” he murmurs suggestively, and an involuntary shudder travels down your spine from the ticklish sensation of his breath on the hair on the back of your neck. “Kinda driving me crazy,” he half-mumbles, half-chuckles.
“It can’t be that hard to drive you crazy,” you point out. “You already live on the corner of Bonkers Boulevard and Delulu Drive.”
“Wow, and you call me a menace?” he snorts in amusement, reaching over to pinch your side in retaliation and laughing when you dance away with a giggle. “Come back, I thought we had to stick together,” he complains.
You roll your eyes but stop just ahead of him, hands placed on your hips as you wait for him to catch up.
“That’s better,” he finally says when he’s beside you once more. “You know, maybe we should hold hands.” he suggests, smiling wider and nodding vigorously in an attempt to convince you when you look over at him with a “no” already on the tip of your tongue.
“And why would we do that?” you ask, tilting your head to the side in a patronizing act of confusion.
“It’s crowded. What if someone walks between us and you turn to enter an exhibit but I don’t see where you went?” He frowns petulantly, and you scoff dismissively.
“You can hold my purse,” you offer, holding it out to him.
“How is that gonna help me stay close to you?” he asks with a frown, and you shoot him a look.
“It’ll help me stay close to you,” you clarify. “All my stuff is in there, so I’m not going anywhere that bag’s not going.”
“Hm. I’d rather hold your hand but I guess this will do.” he sighs dramatically, and you snicker.
“Keep wishing.” you reply casually.
“Oh, I will. Got any loose eyelashes I can wish on and blow away?”
“No.”
“Lucky pennies?”
“I don’t have change. Does the universe take Apple Pay?” you reply in a bored tone, and he snorts loudly in amusement.
“Man, gorgeous and funny,” he sighs contentedly, and it’s your turn to exhale in amusement. “Fine. I’ll wait until 11:11 to make the wish.”
“You know that because you told me what you’re gonna wish for, it’s not gonna come true now, right?” you remind him with a teasing smile, and his eyes widen comically.
“I’ll wish for something different.” he relents, and you can’t help but frown slightly at the crestfallen look on his face. You look around to see if anyone you know is nearby and, seeing no one, let out a defeated yet amused sigh before reaching out and linking your fingers with his. “I knew you liked me,” he remarks with an air of smug satisfaction, and you scowl at him before ripping your fingers from his.
“...And you’re done.”
“Nope, too late,” he replies with a wide grin as he links his fingers with yours again, either oblivious to the fight you’re putting up or simply unfazed. “We’re locked in now.” he teases, and you raise your brows in a silent challenge.
“Oh, yeah? Should I call you something cutesy like—oh,” you say, stopping mid-sentence and turning to look at him with a slowly growing mischievous smile. “What was that name Winter called you on the way here?”
“Oh, please don’t.”
“Was it Snookums?” you think aloud, and he groans, tossing his head back dramatically.
“Please?”
“Cuddlebug?”
“No—”
“Oh!” you exclaim, snapping your fingers and pointing at him. “Pookie Bear.” you say triumphantly, and the grimace on his face is beyond rewarding.
“You don’t have to call me that,” Haechan says hurriedly. “In fact, I’d rather you not—”
“But I love calling you Pookie Bear, Pookie Bear.” you coo affectionately, putting extra emphasis on the embarrassing pet name to leave it dripping with saccharine sweetness.
“You know what’s kind of crazy?” he asks, and you shake your head.
“Besides you? No.”
“Ha, ha.” he drawls. “What’s crazy is that it’s kinda hot the way you say it.” he points out, and you whine loudly in protest.
“I can’t have anything, man! I get to torment you back for less than two minutes, and your freaky little self likes it?” you gripe under your breath as you pull him towards the large sign indicating the doorway to the beginning of the Greek sculptures exhibit. “We’re here!” you announce happily.
“Anything I should know before we enter this section?” he asks curiously, and you think for a moment before nodding.
“Most, if not all, of these statues have micropenises.” you warn him, and roll your eyes instantly at the immediate amusement on his face. “Keep the dick jokes to a minimum.”
“You got it, princess.” he agrees, nodding cooperatively, and you whirl around to look at him.
“Princess?!”
“You call me Pookie Bear, I call you princess.” he says with a nonchalant shrug, and you narrow your eyes at him in a silent staredown. “It’ll grow on you,” he says confidently as he starts walking into the exhibit.
And as you’re tugged along after him, protesting all the while that “it most certainly will not,” you can’t help but feel like it already has—that is, if the sensation you’re feeling of a lone butterfly fluttering around your stomach has anything to do with it.
“Haechan,” you whisper urgently, shaking your linked hands to get his attention.
He looks over at you curiously, eyebrows raised expectantly, and you point towards a sign in the corridor. “What is it?” he asks. “The café?”
You nod. “I’m hungry.”
“Honestly, I could eat,” he agrees, and you beam up at him, tugging him towards the entrance to the café.
The café is lovely, with a fairly large selection of ready-to-eat foods, and you and Haechan walk around the tables of food before you spot one in the distance and slip your hand out of his to go check it out.
No less than a moment after you’ve let go of Haechan, he practically snatches your hand back up, stubbornly linking his fingers with yours once more.
When you shoot him a look, he just stares at you with a challenge in his eyes, daring you to let go again.
“You’re something else.” you laugh, and he shrugs.
“Give a guy a warning next time,” he replies. “I wasn’t ready to let go.”
“Warning: I’m about to let go,” you say patronizingly, and he just shakes his head. “Wh—no? What do you mean, no?”
”No, you’re not.” he says simply.
“I literally am,” you let out a laugh of disbelief before attempting to tug your fingers from his again. “Haechan, quit being a brat!”
“It’s in my DNA,” he replies with a dismissive shrug. “I like holding hands.”
“Hold your own hand, then.” you snicker, and he shakes his head decisively.
“Like holding your hand better.” he coos fondly, and you roll your eyes. “Just take me with you to check out the food, princess.”
“I’m ignoring that,” you huff, but lead him to the sushi rolls you were staring at nonetheless. “Happy now?”
“Thrilled,” he confirms as he smiles over at you, and you bite down on your lip to hide the smile that threatens to greet him. “What are you gonna get?”
“Nothing crazy,” you muse, picking up a tray and inspecting the rolls inside. “Maybe just this and a drink.”
“Which one’s that?” Haechan asks curiously, peering over your shoulder.
“California roll,” you answer with a smile before reaching into the refrigerated drink section and grabbing an organic peach soda.
Haechan follows your lead, picking up a sushi roll container and snagging a Dr. Pepper from the drink area before you two make your way to the cashier to pay.
The cashier greets you both with a friendly smile and rings you up first. When you’re about to pay, Haechan grips the back of your cardigan and firmly but gently pulls you away from the counter before tapping his phone to the payment screen.
“You didn’t need to do that,” you huff with a frown, and he just smiles as the receipt comes out.
“I’m a gentleman,” he replies simply as the cashier rings him up, and you snort in amusement.
“Is that what they’re calling it these days?” you ask dryly, and he narrows his eyes at you. When it’s his turn to pay, you inch closer to the payment screen in the hopes to return the favor, but Haechan is one step ahead of you, plucking your phone from your hand with ease and pocketing it before tapping his phone to the screen again.
“Yeah, it is,” he replies with a cheery grin, smugness laced in his voice. “Come on, let’s eat.”
You two thank the cashier before heading towards the back of the café, where you sit at the corner table, Haechan sliding in beside you.
“You couldn’t sit over there?” you ask flatly, gesturing to the empty spot in front of you, and he shakes his head with a teasing smile. “Of course not.” you sigh in defeat, instead opening your California roll tray and breaking the wooden chopsticks to start eating. “What’d you get?”
Haechan pauses to look at the label on his container before opening it. “Seaside salmon roll,” he replies, snapping his chopsticks neatly into two before picking up a piece of sushi from the carefully composed roll.
“Ooh, yum,” you say before placing a piece of your own roll into your mouth and chewing, your eyes sliding shut in bliss. “God, that’s good.”
“This sushi tastes like heaven,” Haechan groans happily, and you giggle, your mood lifting with some good food entering your system.
“Hey,” you say as you pick up your next piece, “I just realized; what if they want to get food after this?” you ask, and he shrugs.
“Either we’re not hungry, or we get something small.” he suggests, and you nod in agreement before eating the next piece of sushi.
“Are you gonna be sneaky and pay for that, too?” you ask, unamused, and he nods proudly. “I can pay for my own food, you know; my librarian job makes decent pay.”
“Yeah, well, I can pay, too. My job definitely pays decently.” Haechan replies stubbornly.
“Oh, yeah? And what do you do?” you question.
“I’m a wine sommelier for a high-end restaurant downtown.” he answers proudly, and you purse your lips in quiet defeat.
“That actually does sound like a decent-paying job.” you admit, and he nods confidently. “Well, hey, did you know they sell wine here?”
“Oh, yeah?” he asks, looking around for the wine menu and relaxing once you point it out to him.
“Yep. So tell me, Mr. Sommelier, which wine would go best with my California roll?” you quiz him, and his lips quirk up into a smile.
“What’s the taste like?” he asks, and you pick up a piece and put it on his tray, signaling for him to try it. “Without tasting it, I’d say a nice… light, fruity wine would be good for this.” he suggests before placing the piece of sushi in his mouth. As he chews, his smile widens and he nods in confirmation, adding, “I’d definitely say a nice Pinot Grigio would go great with this. The sweet and light notes of the Pinot Grigio would go really well with the flavors here.”
You’re not going to lie to yourself; it’s a little attractive to see him talk about something he knows so much about.
“Yeah?” you hum. “What about yours?”
“Oh, Pinot Noir, for sure. It’s sharp enough to match the heaviness of the salmon, but not too sweet where it takes away from the overall flavor.”
You nod, taking in the information and secretly composing yourself as your insides squeal girlishly at his confident explanation.
“That’s pretty cool, Haechan,” you remark, impressed, and he smiles in satisfaction.
“Isn’t it? You know, we should go on a wine tasting date some time.” he suggests, and you shoot him a suspicious side glance.
“A wine tasting what?” you press.
“Did I say date?” Haechan asks with a chuckle, and you nod slowly, still regarding him carefully. “I meant outing. A wine tasting outing.”
“Nice save,” you snort, and he huffs petulantly.
“It’s not my fault,” he defends himself. ‘I was distracted.”
You raise an eyebrow skeptically. “Distracted?” you ask, and he nods firmly.
“Yeah, your little skirt is messing with my head.” Haechan grunts, and you look down at your lap with a bewildered questioning noise.
To be fair, it is a cute skirt; your beige and black plaid pleated skirt was carefully selected from your closet earlier and clearly must have been a flattering choice, given that Haechan literally can’t keep his eyes off of you.
“Then look up and not at my legs, silly.”
“But if I look up, I see—” he starts to complain but stops as he does just that, looking up from his—well, your—lap and trailing off slowly as he gazes at you.
You’re pretty sure you don’t need to hear what he was going to say, because his face reads loud and clear; there’s desire swimming clearly in his gaze and his lips are parted ever so slightly as he spaces out staring back and forth from your lips to your eyes.
“If you look up, you see… my face?” you supply in an attempt to help him regain his sensibility, and his lips part more as he struggles to find the right words. “I mean, yeah, and my shirt? Well, it’s a white tank—like, yeah, it’s a little short, but—and this is just a beige cardigan, so it’s not as distracting if you look up instead—”
“If I look up,” Haechan says carefully, “I see you.”
For a moment, you’re rendered speechless as the implications of his words sink in.
Looking at him again, you realize there’s an awe in his eyes as he watches you, an adoration almost, and the context of him seeing you sets in. His eyes rove over your face with an almost greed, darting around rapidly as he frantically takes in every detail he can manage to commit to memory.
He’s not looking at you like he’s undressing you, like he’s groping you with a glance; he’s looking at you like you’re one of the seven wonders of the world—like he can’t quite contemplate everything he’s seeing, but he’s damn sure going to try. His gaze caresses you like you’re an antique artifact at the museum that could break if you so much as stare at it too hard.
Observing the way he looks at you is the closest you’ve come yet to understanding how and why the eyes have been referred to as the windows to the soul. His gaze is so open, so vulnerable and wondrous that you have to ponder, for a moment, if this is what it looks like to fall in love.
You push the thought from your head as soon as it emerges, not willing to give it any space in your mind, but you can’t shake the way his gaze completely unravels you.
He watches you like he can see every complexity of your personality in your pores; like he can see your unspoken words reflected in the gloss on your lips—like your eyes hold the manuscript of your hopes and dreams and he’s about to pore over it, memorizing it down to the letter.
He looks at you like he’s dangerously close to seeing you; you, past your barriers and caution tape; you, with all your intricacies and contradictions; and you, with all the hope and yearning and vulnerability you’ve had since your youth that you’ve been trying to convince everyone is no longer around.
You’re utterly overwhelmed with all the thoughts swimming in your brain at the moment, and one thought swims up to the forefront, displaying itself loud and clear and unignorable.
He looks at you like he’s falling in love.
“Haechan, please stop looking at me like that,” you beg in a whisper, scared to speak any louder in case your voice trembles. Something about the intensity of his gaze is beautiful and terrifying all at once, and you’re not ready for him to see you unraveled like this.
Haechan must be able to sense the panic in your voice, your underlying fear of being truly seen and known undoubtedly ringing out in the silence between you two, because he smiles reassuringly and relents, softening the intensity of his gaze until he’s displaying nothing more than mild curiosity and fascination.
“Thanks.” you mutter shyly, averting your gaze to inspect your cuticles in a feeble attempt to act natural.
“No problem. Can I say something, though?” he asks, and you nod, internally bracing yourself. “Have you heard of twin flames?”
“Yeah, isn’t that like soulmates, kinda?” you reply.
something about him was made for somebody like me baby, come over, come over and god knows i’m trying, but there’s just no use in denying
“Kinda,” he says slowly. “Some people call them ‘mirror souls,’” he explains. “Essentially, they’re two people with an intense soul connection that makes them complete when they’re together.”
You pout thoughtfully. “Like two halves of a whole?”
“Something like that, yeah,” he agrees. “The term ‘mirror souls’ is a bit more fitting, because they complement each other; they’re opposites in crucial ways, but in ways that could either ruin things or make them work really well together.”
”Okay,” you say carefully. “Well, thanks for the mini lesson. Why’d you bring that up?”
“I feel drawn to you.” he explains in a rush, almost like he’s been waiting for the opportunity to say it. “Like, I can’t explain it, but when I first met you, I felt—I don’t know—something.”
“I’d wager that the something you felt was just the blood rushing down to your d—” you remark dryly, but he cuts you off, shaking his head.
“It wasn’t.” he insists. “I felt a connection. And you felt it too—remember?”
“No,” you lie. You remember all too well, actually.
“You flirted with me.” he reminds you with a triumphant grin, and you frown.
“That was before I found out you were dating my friend!”
“So the connection magically went away? Hm? The initial attraction you had to me just vanished into thin air?” he presses.
“I locked it in a closet.” you admit. “It can’t come out.”
“Well, unlock it.”
“I have swallowed the key.” you reply stubbornly.
“Well, I’m picking the lock.” he counters, and you gape at him indignantly.
“You can’t do that!”
“And why not?”
“You have a girlfriend.” you remind him, and he has the audacity to scoff and roll his eyes, making you gasp in horror. “Ooh, I’m telling.”
“Who cares about that?” he asks, waving a hand dismissively.
“Um, gee, I would wager that your girlfriend does.” you reply sarcastically. “And you should care, too.”
“All that yapping—”
“I know this boy did not just say I’m yapping—”
“—and you still didn’t say that you care.” he finishes, and you stop short, blinking at him in surprise. “Gotcha.”
“Oh, shut up,” you groan. “I’m not your girlfriend, you know—I don’t have to put up with this.”
“Do you want to be her?” he asks, and you freeze, staring at him incredulously.
“No? I barely know you, and from what I do know, you like stepping out on your girlfriend.”
“False. I don’t like to step out on my girlfriend,” he corrects you, and you roll your eyes. “I just like you.”
“Stop saying that.” you warn.
“I mean it.” he says simply.
“You’re gonna get us in trouble if you keep talking like that.” you reply nervously.
“The risk is so worth it though, don’t you think?” he murmurs conspiratorially, and you stare at him blankly.
”No.” you reply flatly, entirely unamused.
Haechan pouts—somehow handsomely—and nudges you with his shoulder, saying, “Come on… try living a little.”
“No.”
”You know you want to.” he coaxes, and you grumble unintelligibly under your breath.
”What I want is for you to drop the subject,” you say, batting your lashes at him for the effect. “Pretty please?”
His gaze darkens slightly. “Beg again.”
“I didn’t beg!” you splutter, both indignant and flustered by the shift in the air. “I requested politely.”
“Well, request politely again. You’re really cute when you do that, you know.”
”And on that note, this conversation is over. Now,” you say slowly, patting your lap and nudging him with your shoulder. “I think we should probably get back. Y’know… before they notice we went missing.”
“I guess you’re right,” Haechan agrees with a reluctant sigh, gathering your and his food containers and standing up. “Lead the way, princess.”
“Don’t call me that,” you whisper loudly, and he grins cheekily as you two make your way to exit the museum café.
“Stop liking it and I’ll stop doing it.” He retorts, stopping in front of you suddenly so you bump into him.
“Haechan!” you can’t help but laugh at his refreshingly playful nature, and he looks over at you with a twinkle in his eyes. “Has anyone ever told you you’re kind of a brat?”
“Yes, actually.” he replies thoughtfully. “But it takes one to know one.”
You stop short and he turns back to look at you curiously. “Are you calling me a brat?”
“Yes,” he replies easily with a smile. “Yes, I am.” And before you can retaliate, he’s speed walking towards the garbage to throw out your waste, stopping just in front of the exit to wait for you. When you get closer, still staring at him with narrowed eyes, he shoots you a dazzling smile and opens the door, holding it for you.
”Ladies first.”
“Oh, now you’re a gentleman.”
“What do you mean, ‘now?’” Haechan replies, shocked. “I let you sit first, I held the door for you, I threw out your garbage for you and paid—”
“Which you definitely shouldn’t have done, by the way.” you interject, and he stares blankly at you. “Don’t get me wrong, my wallet and I appreciate you greatly, but I was more than capable of paying for myself.”
“It’s okay,” he muses lightheartedly, shrugging. “You can just make it up to me sometime.”
You pause, staring at him suspiciously. “And how would I do that?”
“I’ll come up with something,” he replies with a small secretive smile.
“I don’t like the sound of that.” you say slowly, and he laughs, throwing his arm around your shoulders goodnaturedly.
“It won’t be anything drastic,” he assures you. “Just something like… a kiss.”
“A kiss?” you splutter, and he grins, nodding. “You’d better be joking.”
He turns his head towards you, tightening his grip around your neck not enough to be overbearing but just enough to prevent you from turning your face away. “And what if I’m not?” His voice softens as he continues, “Hm?”
A long silence passes between you two—far longer than socially acceptable—during which Haechan stares pointedly at your mouth and you attempt to avoid doing the same. After what feels like ages, you break the tension-laden quiet by clearing your throat and walking forward and out of his embrace.
“You’re dangerous, you know that?” you say over your shoulder, and Haechan chuckles as he catches up to you.
“I do.” he replies simply, and you snort. He leans over, bringing his lips to your ear, and murmurs, “And I think you like it.”
TA DA!!!!! i hope you enjoyed your read! the second part will be up in exactly two weeks! reminder that (only if you’re able) tips are very much appreciated, as is positive feedback! if you’d like to be added to the taglist, just shoot me an ask and please make sure your privacy settings are updated accordingly!
ORRRRRR you could sub to my patreon, where the whole fic is already posted in full!! (
LINKS: KO-FI // VENMO // CASHAPP // AMAZON WISHLIST // (if you’d like to support via paypal, let me know off anon!!)
#haechan smut#nct smut#nct 127 smut#nct dream smut#lee haechan smut#donghyuck smut#lee donghyuck smut#will be making a masterlist !!!!!!!! and tagging ppl in the reblog!!#haechan x reader#donghyuck x reader
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Happy Accident
Caleb x female!reader
Genre: fluff
Warnings: mc!reader
Note: quick one shot because I'm obsessed with this man, if you haven't noticed yet.
for masterlist and request info head to the navigation →
continuation of this fic →

The first one may have happened by an accident, but I would say that the other times won't be.
"I did it! I did it Caleb!" you were jumping around with a paper in your hand, the confirmation of your passed test.
"Told you not to doubt yourself." he was watching your energy raise 200 times the normal level, already used to it. You were like a little tornado, running around him, screaming in his ear, just jumping like a little rabbit ever since you came home.
"I didn't doubt myself!" you threw the paper in his direction, harmless, and it wouldn't even fall on him, but he used his evol to make it fly straight into his hand. You didn't react, continuing your happy little hopping.
"Sure, sure, cause it wasn't you who came to my room, threw yourself onto my bed, cried into my pillow asking me to help you study cause you felt... I quote 'dumb as a middle aged man'?" he dodged the pillow you threw his way, while studying the impressive percentage on the paper.
"Shut up, you were only there for the mental support." you said, picking up another pillow for your weapon.
"Yeah, by mental support you mean I was tutoring you for free." he catches the second pillow that flew towards his face, the paper lying forgotten on the coffee table before him.
"You were acting out of the goodness of your heart, what, you want some reward in return for being a good samaritan now huh?" you crossed your arms, looking at him, he stood up from the couch with a pillow in his hand, you had to raise your head to look him in the eye, but you didn't move back, not letting yourself run and giving him the pleasure of winning your staring contest.
"Well, I deserve a thank you, don't I?" he teased, throwing the pillow back onto the couch and taking a step closer to you, you had to raise your head even higher.
"Do you? I don't know." you raised your brows for a second, before staring at him with twice the intensity.
"Is that how much you care about me pipsqueak? I don't even deserve a grateful 'thank you Caleb, you're the best!'?" he mimicked your voice which actually made you crack a smile for a second .
"Thank you Caleb, you're the best!" you said sarcastically "There, happy now?" he looked at you in silence, thinking,
"Hmm no, not quite. You can do better than that." he got even closer to you, and lowered his head, his face now close to yours, never dropping the eye contact.
You huffed, rolling your eyes in 'annoyance'. You took a step towards him, your bodies centimetres away, he looked at you with a silent question, not moving, watching you.
Your face got closer to his, planning on giving him a quick smooch on his cheek but when your lips reached their desired place...
He moved his head...
Both of your eyes widen. You remained unmoving.
With your lips on his.
You didn't know what to do, back up? Continue? Run away and hide in your room? WHAT TO DO? And he had the same dilemma.
You stood there like a stone sculpture for at least a minute.
Your eyelids relaxed, your eyes half opened, both of you slowly broke the 'kiss', but your forehead touched instead, deep breaths being the only noise you heard.
You looked down, not knowing what to say, he was looking at you.
His hand went up to your cheek, raising your head softly and making you gaze into his purple eyes.
You looked at each other with a silent questions.
Taking a risk he decided what to do. He looked down at your lips, slowly closing the distance, you let him do it, you wanted him to do it.
His lips landed on yours once more, this time; intentionally. And from this moment you were lost. No thoughts in your head, just him.
You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling to the fullest, you thought about it so often before falling asleep, never expecting it to happen.
You didn't know for how long you were standing there, seconds, minutes? But the sudden noise of the front door opening made you two pull away instantly.
Both of you dropped to the couch, trying to look natural and not like you were making out a moment ago.
"Hello to you two." Gran walked in, with groceries in her hands, both of you said short greetings and smiled at her before she went to the kitchen, Caleb decided to stand up and go help her unpack everything like he always did, but you caught his hand in panic.
He looked at you with another quiet question.
"Your lips..." you whispered, gesturing at your own. He raised his hand to his mouth, wiping them once and showing you the result.
You looked in the direction Gran went, and stood up to help him wipe the rest of your lipstick from his lips.
You wiped it with your hand to the best of your ability, luckily the color came out easily.
"You can go now." you whispered again, taking a step back, but he pulled you back by your arm, planting a quick kiss on your lips before turning around to go and help Gran.
You stood there dumbfounded.
What the hell just happened.
#i need this guy like i need caffeine#caleb x reader#caleb x you#caleb x mc#caleb#caleb fluff#caleb love and deepspace#caleb l&ds#caleb lnds#caleb lads#love and deepspace caleb#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace#lads#l&ds#lnds
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red | zayne | prologue to through the fire
synopsis : Fate chose another, but his heart never stopped choosing you. content : soulmate!au, zayne x reader x sylus, zayne x non-mc!reader, unrequited love, angst (light or not, you decide)
read : through the fire
Shaiya
Zayne stared at the name etched into his skin, barely brushing his fingers over the letters as if touching it would somehow make it less real.
Silence crashed around him like a wave. The world dimmed.
No, he thought, chest tightening. It should’ve been her name.
Yours.
He wanted to claw at it, to tear it off and rewrite the universe.
But all he did was stare—still, quiet, unreadable. His face gave nothing away, though his heart was screaming.
You didn’t cry when he told you.
He had expected the silence. Maybe even anger.
But not the way you reached for him, pulling him into a soft embrace as if you were the one offering comfort.
As if you were the one letting go.
You smiled.
And that broke him in ways he couldn’t explain.
He held you too tightly for a moment too long, afraid that if he let go, everything between you would unravel.
Then he forced a smile—calm, polite, practiced. Like he was happy. Like this wasn’t the end of something sacred.
But he wasn’t.
He didn’t love Shaiya—not then. There was no spark, no fireworks when he first saw her in the park.
There was just you.
You, with your quiet steadiness, your silent understanding. You, who noticed every flicker of emotion on his face, even when no one else did. You, who knew how to wait through his silences.
But something kept pulling him back to Shaiya. A whisper in his gut. A gravitational force he couldn’t explain.
So he went.
And when she laughed, something in him stirred. When she smiled, he felt breathless. Her presence, soft and bright, wrapped around him like a tether he hadn’t asked for—but couldn’t ignore.
It wasn’t like with you.
With you, it was slow, quiet, real.
With her, it was sudden—like being caught in a current he couldn’t swim against.
And yet, even as he sat beside Shaiya, laughing at something she said, he couldn’t stop his thoughts from drifting.
Back to you.
Back to the way you smiled without expectation. Back to the warmth of your hug.
Back to everything he was afraid he’d just lost.
—•
“Zayne? You there?”
He jolted upright at the sound of Shaiya’s voice through the phone, pulled sharply from the spiral of thoughts he hadn’t realized he’d fallen into.
He cleared his throat, forcing steadiness into his voice. “Yeah. Sorry—I was signing some reports.”
A lie, smooth and effortless.
Shaiya laughed lightly, the sound soft through the speaker.
“It’s okay.”
Then, after a beat, her tone shifted, quieter. Concerned. “I’m a little worried about Y/N. She’s been… distant lately.”
That made him still. Completely.
“What do you mean?” he asked, voice low. His fingers curled against the edge of the desk.
Shaiya hesitated. “She spaces out sometimes. When I talk to her, she smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes. I caught her clutching her wrist the other day—I think she might be hurt, but she brushed it off.”
Zayne didn’t hear the rest. Her voice faded under the weight of his thoughts.
How hadn’t he noticed?
You, the one person he thought he always saw clearly. The one whose silences he understood. He’d been so caught in the chaos of his own confusion that he hadn’t seen you unraveling in the quiet.
He swallowed, guilt settling in like a stone. “I’ll talk to her,” he murmured.
“Okay,” Shaiya replied, her voice soft again. “I’m heading to bed now—early shift tomorrow. Don’t forget to eat after yours.”
The line disconnected, and silence bloomed in the space it left behind.
He sat for a moment, staring at nothing. Then he stood.
Before he could talk himself out of it, his feet carried him across the corridor.
He stopped in front of your door. Raised his hand. Hesitated.
Did you have a mark yet?
The thought hit him like a wave.
And somewhere—deep and cruel and honest—a voice inside him whispered that he hoped you didn’t. That maybe, if fate had overlooked you too, you’d still stay.
That you’d still look at him the way you always had.
That he wouldn’t lose you completely.
But even he knew that was selfish.
So he knocked, softly.
No reply.
The door creaked open.
He stepped inside, meaning to call your name, to ask if you were alright—but the words never made it past his lips.
You were asleep, curled up at your desk, your breathing steady. Peaceful.
And then he saw it.
A flash of red ink on your wrist.
His name.
His breath caught.
Everything in him stilled.
This—this wasn’t how it was supposed to go.
His name was on your skin. In red. And he hadn’t even known.
He stumbled back like the air had turned to fire, his legs moving before he could think.
The door slammed behind him as he pressed his back against it, chest rising and falling in erratic waves.
That’s why.
That’s why you’d been pulling away. Why you smiled like it hurt. Why you never said a word.
Because it did hurt.
And all this time, he’d been too blind to see it.
Tears stung his eyes, blurring the fluorescent lights of his office as he clenched his fists at his sides.
You had been burning alone. Crying alone.
And now that he knew—
There was still nothing he could do.
—•
He saw you.
It was late—close to midnight—when he stepped out of his car, bone-tired from another shift.
The streets were quiet, bathed in the soft yellow haze of flickering streetlamps.
And there you were.
Leaving your apartment, coat hastily thrown on, arms folded tightly around yourself like you were holding yourself together.
Zayne froze, half in the shadow of the trees lining the sidewalk.
He meant to call out. Your name was already on the tip of his tongue.
But then he saw your face.
Not just the weariness, but something sharper—something broken.
Sadness. Anger. Resignation.
And suddenly, he couldn’t speak.
Because he knew—
He knew it was because of him.
So he stayed silent.
Just watched.
He followed your steps with his eyes as you crossed the street, your pace slow, unsteady.
The city was quiet around you, but inside, you were a storm. He could see it. He felt it in the way your shoulders sank.
You disappeared into the dim glow of a small pub tucked between closed storefronts.
He didn’t go in.
He stood across the street, leaning against the hood of his car like a coward, watching through the window as you made your way to the bar.
Sluggish. Heavy.
He saw your hand signal the bartender. Saw the first drink vanish. Then the second. Then the third.
His chest tightened with every empty glass.
Because it was his fault.
He was the reason you were unraveling one drink at a time. The reason your mark burned red with his name while he bore someone else’s in black.
Then—
He saw him.
A stranger. Tall. Pale hair that glinted under the bar’s low lighting.
Zayne’s breath caught as he watched the man slide onto the stool beside you, say something with a smile, and slide across a piece of paper.
He saw your smile falter. Saw the pain flicker across your features like lightning.
Saw the way your body flinched, just barely, like a wound had been pressed too hard.
And Zayne saw it all.
Every agonizing detail.
But he didn’t move.
Didn’t cross the street. Didn’t pull open the door.
He couldn’t.
Because what would he say?
What right did he have?
He stood there, paralyzed in the dark, watching you turn away from the man politely, watching you order another drink with trembling fingers.
And he hated himself more with every breath.
—•
Two days later, he stepped into your office.
The door clicked softly behind him, and for a moment, he simply stood there—watching you work, your shoulders tense, eyes tired in that way only he seemed to notice.
He cleared his throat gently. “Long day?”
His voice was calm, casual, as he placed a cup of coffee on your desk like it was just another routine between colleagues.
You looked up and offered him a smile—soft, warm, as if nothing had changed. As if nothing had shattered between you.
“Thanks,” you said quietly, fingers curling around the warmth of the cup.
It hurt.
Because he saw it now—what he’d missed before.
The subtle flinch when your skin brushed the sleeve of your sweater.
The split-second delay in your smile. The way you didn’t quite meet his eyes.
He swallowed. The words slipped out before he could stop them.
“I saw you out. Two nights ago.”
The air shifted.
You stilled for a fraction of a second, but didn’t look away.
He wished he hadn’t said it, but he couldn’t help himself. He wasn’t just worried. He was jealous.
His jaw tightened as he brought his coffee to his lips. “Were you drinking again?”
His voice cracked—just barely—but enough to betray him.
You blinked. Then turned your gaze to the window, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Just needed some air. That’s all.”
And then, as if your body hadn’t yet caught up with your lie, your fingers drifted down, brushing against your wrist—so faintly it would’ve gone unnoticed.
But he saw it.
He always saw you.
He opened his mouth, something sharp and aching rising in his throat.
But he bit it back.
The truth. The apology. The longing.
None of it would fix what fate had done.
So he stepped back.
“Don’t overwork yourself,” he said, turning on his heel before the tremble in his voice could betray him again.
And he walked away.
Because what else could he say?
When it was his name on your wrist.
And someone else’s on his.
—•
A week later, he stood motionless in his office, staring blankly at the floor.
Shaiya’s voice still echoed in his ears.
“She found her soulmate.”
His heart didn’t sink—it clenched. Like something inside him had braced for a blow and still wasn’t ready for the impact.
He didn’t believe it.
Not for a second.
Because he knew you.
Knew the kind of lies people told when they were trying to protect themselves from pain.
Before reason could stop him, his body had already moved. He found himself standing in front of your office again, just like he had so many times before—only now there was something different clinging to the air.
A desperation he couldn’t admit.
He wanted to shake you. To ask why.
Why you were doing this to yourself. To him.
Why you were pretending this didn’t hurt when everything in your eyes told him otherwise.
But he said none of that.
Instead, he knocked gently and stepped in.
You looked up at him, and for a moment he forgot how to breathe.
Because you smiled. Small. Warm.
As if nothing had changed.
As if it didn’t ache.
And that only made it worse.
“I heard from Shaiya,” he said, voice low, too even. “You found him?”
You nodded, the gesture soft, almost apologetic. “Yeah.”
His mouth parted slightly, like there was something he needed to say—but the words caught halfway.
“That’s… good,” he said finally. But the pause before the word good was a wound all on its own.
It hung in the air. Heavy.
And it wasn’t joy that colored his tone. Not even relief.
There was something else.
You blinked, startled by the hollowness of it. “Is everything okay?”
Zayne looked at you, long and quiet, his gaze searching your face like it held an answer to something he couldn’t name.
Then, slowly, the mask returned.
A neutral expression. The kind he wore in operating rooms. In grief.
“Yes,” he replied, forcing the edges of his mouth to lift. “I’m just… glad for you.”
But even you could hear it.
The tremor beneath the stillness. The way glad didn’t quite land.
Silence stretched.
Zayne looked away for a moment, then back—eyes flickering with something raw, something not yet buried deep enough.
And still—he said nothing.
Because what could he say, when it was his name on your skin—
And someone else’s story you were trying to live?
When Zayne stepped out of your office, his chest tight and throat dry, he nearly walked past him—
The man from the bar.
Tall, silver-haired, with that same calm presence that had unsettled him days ago.
This time, he stood waiting. Expecting him.
“I’m Sylus,” the man said coolly, offering nothing more than his name—because he knew it was enough.
Zayne stopped mid-stride.
His eyes widened for a brief second before narrowing into something colder. His fists clenched at his sides, knuckles white.
He remembered that night.
The flash of your pain. The way Sylus had leaned in, close but careful, like he knew exactly how much space to take.
Zayne’s jaw tightened.
“Take care of her,” he said, voice sharp but restrained. Controlled. Like a blade held at the throat but never pressed in.
Then he turned without waiting for a reply, shoulders stiff, the weight of what he couldn’t say trailing behind him like a shadow.
But if he had stayed just a second longer—
He would’ve seen it.
The slow, knowing smirk tugging at Sylus’s lips.
Not arrogant, not mocking—just assured.
A look that said he would.
And maybe even more than that—
That he already was.
—•
The hospital hallway was quiet at this hour—just the faint hum of fluorescent lights and the echo of distant footsteps.
Zayne stood alone in the on-call room, the door shut behind him, the walls far too close.
He leaned against the locker, head tipped back, eyes closed.
But the silence wasn’t peace.
It was suffocating.
She found someone.
She said she found her soulmate.
The words circled in his mind like vultures, tearing into the edges of his restraint.
He clenched his fists, breathing slow—too slow, like he was trying to stay afloat in his own chest.
Sylus.
The name had weight now. It wasn’t just a stranger from the bar anymore—it was someone you had chosen. Someone who made you smile, even through the ache.
Someone who could stand beside you without carrying the guilt Zayne did.
His hand lifted without thinking, pressing to his chest like he could calm the sharp, twisting ache there.
He didn’t understand it.
Why did the mark choose Shaiya?
Why not her?
Why not you?
Because if the universe had any sense of justice, it would’ve branded your name into his skin.
Not someone else’s.
Not someone he had to learn to care about.
Not someone who wasn’t you.
Zayne sank onto the bench, elbows on his knees, fingers tangled in his hair.
His shoulders hunched in on himself, like the weight of everything was finally catching up.
All the moments he’d brushed aside.
The quiet hurt in your eyes.
The way you smiled like you were trying to protect him.
He remembered the night he saw you drinking, the way you flinched when Sylus got too close, the pain you thought no one saw.
And he had done nothing.
He had stood there, watching.
Helpless.
His name was on your wrist. In red.
And it didn’t matter.
Because fate had already played its cruel joke—and he had laughed along with it, pretending he could live with it. Pretending he was fine.
But he wasn’t.
He had spent so long mastering silence, mastering stillness—he didn’t know how to fight for something that wasn’t supposed to be his.
His breath trembled, a rare crack in the mask he wore even when no one was watching.
He wanted to scream.
To demand answers from whatever force had decided this was how the story would end.
But all he could do was sit there.
In a quiet room.
With your name echoing like a phantom in his chest.
And nothing he could do to make you stay.
#lads#lads x reader#love and deepspace#lnds x reader#love and deepspace x reader#lads zayne#lnds#zayne love and deepspace#l&ds x reader#lads sylus#lads x y/n#lads angst#lnds angst#lnds sylus#lads x you#zayne angst#lnds zayne#l&ds zayne#zayne x you#doctor zayne#zayne x reader
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I've been reading all these non MC!reader fics and they're all so delicious in their own ways. They really make think about like what would it be like to be the person that's yearning so very desperately even if they believe that it's hopeless. What would it be like to watch the greatest love story to ever unfold live and in color right in front of their eyes while their own world breaks to pieces in the sidelines? what does that pain feel like? That resignation?
How do you go against something that they fought for over and over and over again? That they believe to be written in their stars? They'll choose MC. They'll always choose MC.
And who is the reader? All they can ever hope to be is a friend-a footnote in their grand story. Maybe they'll get a sliver, a fraction of warmth that he'll show MC but it won't ever be what the reader wants. They're second best, at most a distraction. And can they live with the pain of constantly being looked over-of constantly being brushed aside.
Maybe at first they suck it up. They tell themselves that it's better to be in his life than to face a future without him in it in some fashion. They try their best to ignore the yawning pit in their stomach, the way their chest aches, the hallowing of their entire being each time he looks over at MC and his gaze softens. Becomes loving.
It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
And maybe they stay that way-stubbornly rooted in place, determined to rot. Maybe they stay to laugh with them (because at this point MC has become a friend, without their permission and even real understanding), only to go home and sob what's left of their heart out. It's in those darkest moments that they even attempt to acknowledge the pain within them. Maybe they keep doing this until it all sort of numbs over. And despite all that they love him and so they wake up to do it all over again.
It's okay.
Until maybe it isn't.
Until maybe something vital cracks and splinters and all they can do is push back, get away. Until maybe they finally catch a glance of themselves in the mirror and the haze lifts long enough for them to finally see.
Blood shot eyes, swollen and itchy. Skin leeched of any and all color, leaving only a sickly tinge. Hallowed cheeks. Cracked, dry lips. Exhaustion given form, given substance. Defeat and misery lovingly woven into every stitch of clothing.
That's reader-this new version of them anyhow. And it's in that moment, in the dim lighting of their room, staring at themselves through their dirty, grease stained mirror, that they really and truly see themselves. See the version of them that broke apart to keep a love alive that had no purpose being birthed in the first place.
And maybe that's when they finally, truly understand. Maybe that's when they can let go.
----------------------------------------------------
And something that's so incredibly delicious to me is when we switch gears in this moment. In the moment where the reader is finally, slowly, painfully, getting themselves together, that's when he starts waking up for real.
Maybe he loved reader all along and was too stubborn to look away from what he's already decided is his forever. Maybe he loved reader but he refused to even acknowledge that because if he does??? If he does acknowledge those feelings-if he opens that specific box and lets himself love the reader, then what was the point?
How can he stand to look himself in the eye? Is his love really that fickle? Can he truly look away from the one he'd been obsessing over for years just because of the reader?
How dare they.
How dare they come into his life and show him a love so very different than the one he'd shared with MC but beautiful in its own right? How dare they come into his life and upend the plans he'd made, the future he'd envisioned?
And he struggles with this-struggles with the love he has for the reader, the slowly burgeoning one, cultivated over years of camaraderie, with the love he has for MC, beautiful and cosmic and with decades of shared history.
A budding sunflower forced to grow through concrete, a tough thing that refuses to go unacknowledged. The reader had been there, time after time after time. A smile reserved only for him resting on their face. And he'd grown complacent-reliant on their easy affection when things had become difficult with MC.
(And isn't that telling).
Until that sunflower was gone, plucked by greedy fingers and left to wither away against the burning concrete.
He'd try to save it. Try to reestablish a connection that's already broken no matter how many times he tries to replant that flower.
Reader leaves and he's left holding the remains of their love, the petals having long since fallen off.
Misunderstandings. A love that was just right but wrong in all the ways it could ever be. Maybe non mc!reader is better off. Maybe they're not. Idk but I find any and all fics with a non mc!reader to be delicious all the same.
#non mc!reader#lads#lads sylus x reader#lads caleb x reader#lads xavier x reader#lads rafayel x reader#lads zayne x reader#if you guys wanna send me some that would be great because I need them lol
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PLEASE PART 2 ON THE SELF DOUBT ANGEST PUHHHLEEEEEEASE

SELF-DOUBT │ PART 2

Pt.1
PAIRING: Love and Deepspace men x reader (reader is implied to be the MC in Caleb's part)
SYNOPSIS: Part 2 of "Self-doubt" - comfort!!
A/N: Finally, it's here. Hope you enjoy!


Xavier
Finally deciding to go home and drown your sorrows in sleep, you stood, your limbs heavy, your breath unsteady. But before you could take a step, the sound of approaching footsteps stopped you in your tracks.
Soft at first, deliberate, hesitant—yet steady. Familiar.
You didn't have to look up to know who it was.
A quiet sigh left your lips. "Xavier."
He didn’t speak right away, but you could feel him watching you. There was no judgment in his gaze, no demand for explanation. Just patience. A patience that made something fragile inside you crack even more.
Wordlessly, he sat beside you, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him, even in the biting chill of the night. Neither of you spoke, and for once, the silence wasn't unbearable. It was different. Softer.
"You scared me," he finally admitted, his voice quieter than usual, as if he was afraid that speaking too loud would shatter whatever fragile state you were in.
You swallowed, your fingers curling into the fabric of your sleeves. "I’m fine."
Xavier hummed, unconvinced. "You’re not. But I’m not here to force you to talk. I just... didn’t want you to be alone."
Something thick lodged itself in your throat at his words. The lump of emotions you'd tried so hard to suppress threatened to spill over.
"Why?" Your voice was barely above a whisper, so raw it almost hurt to speak. "Why do you always—"
"Care?" he finished for you, a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips, though his eyes remained serious. "Because you matter to me. You always have. And I don’t know what’s going on in that head of yours, but I know one thing for certain—you are not some afterthought. You are not unworthy. You are not less."
Your breath hitched, eyes burning. "You don’t understand."
Xavier exhaled, running a hand through his hair, frustrated but not with you—with whatever had made you feel like this. "Then make me understand. If you don’t want to talk, I’ll sit here with you until you do. If you want to pretend everything is fine, I’ll let you. But I’m not leaving."
You turned to him then, really looked at him. At the certainty in his expression, the unwavering belief in his eyes. It was so infuriatingly Xavier—so effortlessly kind, so utterly steadfast—that it made your heart ache in ways you couldn’t put into words.
You opened your mouth, but no excuses came. No lies. No ways to push him away.
Instead, your voice cracked, and before you could stop yourself, you whispered, "I don’t know how to stop feeling like this."
Xavier didn’t hesitate. He reached out, hesitantly at first, as if giving you the choice to pull away. But you didn’t. You let him take your hand, let his warmth seep into your cold fingers, grounding you.
"You don’t have to do it alone," he murmured. "I don’t care how long it takes. Just… don’t shut me out."
The dam inside you broke.
A choked sob tore through you, your body shaking under the weight of everything you had been holding in for far too long. And Xavier—he didn’t flinch, didn’t let go. He simply pulled you close, wrapping you in the kind of embrace that felt less like comfort and more like something solid. Something safe.
You clung to him, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you allowed yourself to believe that maybe—just maybe—you weren’t as alone as you thought.
And maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to be.
His fingers traced slow, soothing circles against your back, his breath warm against your temple. "I don't want you to disappear into the dark. If you let me, I'll stay."
The words, so simple yet so profound, settled into your chest like an ember, slow-burning and tender. You lifted your head, meeting his gaze, and in the hush of the night, something unspoken passed between you—something delicate, something inevitable.
Xavier’s thumb brushed the damp trail of a tear from your cheek, his touch unbearably gentle. "I see you," he murmured, and before you could think, before you could hesitate, he was leaning in.
It was soft, barely there—a whisper of a kiss against your forehead, a silent promise. Not rushed, not demanding, just steady. Just real.
And for the first time, you let yourself believe it.


Zayne
The city had always been too loud, yet tonight, it felt impossibly quiet. The kind of quiet that pressed against your ribs, heavy and suffocating, filling the spaces between heartbeats with something unnamed and unrelenting. The café door had long since closed behind you, but the ghost of Zayne’s presence still lingered, his voice a phantom echo in your mind.
You walked without direction, only moving because stillness felt too much like surrender. The night air was crisp, laced with the scent of rain that hadn’t yet fallen, and you breathed it in as if it could cleanse the weight of everything left unsaid. But it didn’t. Of course it didn’t.
Your phone remained in your grasp, screen dark, thumb hovering over his name in your messages. A message unsent. A confession you didn’t dare put into words. You had told yourself you would let this go, let him go—but wasn’t that the cruelest kind of lie?
You stopped beneath the glow of a streetlamp, light spilling over you in fragile, golden threads. Your breath wavered, hands tightening around the fabric of your sleeves. And then, against every instinct screaming at you to forget, to move on—you typed.
“I’m sorry.”
It was inadequate. A pitiful offering for the storm that had brewed between you. But before you could backspace, before you could rethink, you pressed send.
The reply came faster than expected.
“I’m still here.”
Three words. Simple. Unwavering. And yet, they shattered something deep inside you.
You closed your eyes, letting the night swallow you whole. You should have walked away. You should have ignored him the way you had trained yourself to. But Zayne had never been someone you could ignore. And perhaps, just this once, you didn’t want to.
With unsteady fingers, you called him.
The line rang once.
Twice.
A third time.
And then—
“Come back inside.”
His voice was quiet, intimate in a way that sent a tremor through your chest. He wasn’t asking. He wasn’t demanding. Just offering. Leaving the choice in your hands, as he always did.
Your throat tightened. Your heart ached.
For a long moment, you said nothing. You listened to the silence stretching between you, to the quiet promise hidden in his words. And then, with a breath that felt too much like surrender, you turned on your heel, retracing your steps back to the light.
When you stepped back inside, the café was quieter than before. The world outside had not changed, and yet, everything within you had shifted. Zayne was still there, waiting, his gaze unreadable but warm. A cup of something hot sat across from his own, waiting for you, as if he had always known you would return.
You sat without a word, hands wrapping around the warmth of the cup. For a moment, there was only the quiet hum of the café, the soft clink of porcelain, the steady presence of him beside you. And then—
“I never wanted to be someone unreachable,” he murmured, his fingers resting just inches from yours on the table. “Not to you.”
Your breath hitched, something fragile pressing against your ribs. “Zayne—”
“I see you,” he said, voice as steady as the earth beneath you. “Not as an afterthought. Not as someone passing through my life.” His gaze flickered to yours, sharp and unwavering. “But as someone I want in it.”
Something deep inside you cracked wide open.
A shuddering exhale left your lips, and before you could stop yourself, your fingers brushed over his—hesitant, uncertain. But when he turned his palm upward, intertwining his fingers with yours, it was effortless. As if he had been waiting for this moment, just as much as you had.
For the first time in what felt like forever, the weight in your chest eased. The walls you had built so carefully, so stubbornly, faltered in the warmth of his touch.
And for once, you let them fall.


Rafayel
The world felt quieter without him in it.
You told yourself it was for the best, that you had made the right decision. And yet, as the days bled into nights, as the hours passed in dull monotony, you found yourself reaching—again and again—for something that was no longer there.
For him.
For the sound of his laughter, for the weight of his presence filling the spaces you hadn’t realized were empty. For the warmth he carried so effortlessly, the kind of warmth that lingered long after he was gone.
But you had done this to yourself.
And now, you had to live with it.
Or at least, you thought you did—until the knocking started.
Soft at first. A hesitant tap against the door, as though testing if you were even home. And then, more insistent. Steady. Patient. Unyielding.
You ignored it, at first. Pressed your hands against your ears and willed it to stop, to go away. But the universe was never that kind.
“Cutie.”
Your breath caught.
Muffled through the door, but unmistakable. His voice—soft, coaxing, laced with something raw beneath the teasing lilt. A plea hidden in a single word.
You curled deeper into yourself, fingers tightening around the blanket you had wrapped around your frame. If you stayed silent, he’d leave. If you waited long enough, he’d realize you weren’t worth it. That you were doing him a favor.
But he didn’t leave.
He sighed, the sound heavy, filled with something you couldn’t quite name. And then—
“I’m not mad at you.”
The words struck harder than you expected. You squeezed your eyes shut, hating the way your heart clenched, the way your resolve wavered like sand beneath the tide.
“I just...” A pause. A shift, as though he had leaned against the door. “I don’t understand.”
You swallowed. You didn’t want him to understand. Didn’t want him to see the ugly, selfish parts of you, the ones that whispered that maybe—just maybe—you wanted him to fight for you. That you wanted to be more than just another passing moment in his life.
“I thought you knew by now.” His voice was quieter, words woven with something impossibly tender. “You don’t have to keep up with me, cutie. You were never supposed to.”
Your throat tightened.
“I just wanted you there.”
Your fingers twitched. Trembled. Your resolve, already fraying at the edges, threatened to unravel completely.
“I don’t care if you don’t want to see me right now,” he continued, and there was something steady in his voice now. Certain. “But don’t think for a second that I don’t see you.”
A shaky breath. Yours, not his. He was always so sure. So steady. A lighthouse in a storm you hadn’t even realized you were lost in.
The silence stretched between you, thick with everything left unsaid. And then, softer—
“I miss you.”
Your hands clenched into the fabric of your sleeves.
A choice.
A breath.
A surrender.
With trembling fingers, you unlocked the door.
The moment it cracked open, he was there.
Rafayel—bigger than life, impossibly beautiful in the dim light of the hallway. But his eyes, sharp as they were, softened the moment they met yours. He looked at you as if you were something precious. Something worth waiting for.
Something he would wait for, as long as it took.
You exhaled, the weight in your chest easing just slightly. And for the first time in days, you let yourself be selfish.
You stepped forward, barely a breath between you, and before you could think better of it, his arms were around you.
The embrace was immediate, crushing in its intensity. His hands found the back of your head, fingers threading through your hair as he held you tight, as if to assure himself you were real, here, not slipping through his fingers like a dream about to fade.
“Don’t do that again,” he murmured into your hair, voice uneven, raw in a way you had never heard before. “Don’t shut me out.”
Your fingers curled into the fabric of his jacket, knuckles white, grounding yourself in the warmth of him.
“Okay,” you whispered, breath hitching when he pulled back just enough to look at you. His hands cradled your face, touch achingly gentle, reverent, as if memorizing the details of you in case you disappeared again.
He searched your face, gaze flickering between your eyes, your lips, before he exhaled sharply, like he had just made a decision. And then—
Soft. Slow.
His lips brushed against yours, a question, a promise, a silent plea. You melted into him, sighing against his mouth, letting yourself be held, letting yourself be wanted.
When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, breath mingling with yours in the quiet of the night.
“Come inside,” you murmured, voice barely above a whisper.
He smiled, something warm, something yours, and just like that—the world wasn’t so quiet anymore.


Sylus
The hours slipped by in hazy disarray, the wine glass now empty, the room a blur of half-formed thoughts and aching silence. You could feel the chill of the night seeping deeper into your bones, but it wasn’t the cold air that made you shiver. It was the weight of your own thoughts—the gnawing self-doubt, the quiet loneliness that seemed to stretch out forever, wrapping itself around you like an unwanted lover.
You told yourself to be strong. You told yourself to forget. To move on.
But it was impossible to ignore the echo of his name in your mind, the memory of his touch, the way his eyes had looked at you—so soft, so gentle, like you were something more than just a fleeting shadow in his world. You had convinced yourself that it didn’t matter, that you didn’t matter to him. But now, in the silence of your empty apartment, that lie was unraveling at the edges.
You were not enough for him, and yet you had never wanted anything more.
The sound of your phone vibrating again cut through the haze, and for a moment, you simply stared at the screen. The name flashed once more.
Sylus.
The familiar pang of longing twisted in your chest, a sharp, bitter ache. You didn’t want to open it. Didn’t want to be reminded of everything you couldn’t have. You had closed that door, hadn’t you?
But the phone buzzed again. And then again.
Without thinking, your thumb slid across the screen, the message lighting up the dim room.
"I’m outside."
Your heart stuttered in your chest.
You blinked, the words swimming before your eyes. Your pulse quickened. He was here. And for a moment, you almost convinced yourself to ignore him, to let him be just another chapter you could close. But that wasn’t you, was it? You were never one to run from what you felt, no matter how terrifying it seemed.
The sound of his footsteps echoed against the hallway, distant but unmistakable. The way his boots hit the ground with that gentle weight, as though each step was taken with purpose. You felt the air shift as he drew closer, your skin prickling with the intensity of his presence.
The door knocked softly, almost too softly, as though he was waiting for you to make the first move. And for the first time in what felt like forever, you hesitated.
“Please,” his voice reached you, quieter now, as if spoken through the layers of pain you had wrapped yourself in. “Let me in.”
Your breath caught, and without thinking, you turned the knob.
The door swung open, and there he was.
Sylus.
The light from the hallway cast him in a soft glow, outlining his silhouette in such stark contrast to the darkness behind you. His eyes—those eyes, the ones that could see straight through every defense you put up—were soft. Warm, even. There was an urgency to his gaze, but also a tenderness, as if he was afraid to touch you too suddenly, afraid to break the fragile moment that existed between you.
“I couldn’t leave,” he murmured, and his voice cracked just the slightest bit as he spoke, his own emotions laid bare.
Your heart ached at the sight of him, standing there, vulnerable in a way you hadn’t seen before. The man who had once seemed so untouchable, so unreachable, now seemed almost fragile in his need for you.
“You don’t have to do this,” you whispered, voice shaking.
But he stepped forward anyway, and in that moment, everything shifted. His hands were warm when they cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the traces of tears you hadn’t even realized you were still holding back.
“I do,” he said, his voice low and firm, yet undeniably soft. “I do, because I’ve never needed anyone the way I need you.”
And with those words, your world fell away.
Without another word, he pulled you into him, his embrace fierce yet gentle, as though he was afraid you would slip away if he didn’t hold on tight enough. His scent enveloped you, familiar and grounding, and for the first time in days, you allowed yourself to sink into it. You let yourself surrender to the warmth of his arms, the only place that felt like home anymore.
“I was so afraid,” you whispered, your voice muffled against his chest. “So afraid of being nothing to you.”
His fingers threaded through your hair, and he pressed his lips against the top of your head, the softest kiss, a promise more than a gesture.
“You were never nothing to me,” he whispered. “You were never a fleeting thing. I just... I didn’t know how to show you, not when I was so terrified of losing myself in you.”
You pulled back slightly, just enough to meet his gaze, the depth of his words reflected in the dark pools of his eyes. For the first time, you saw it—the same raw vulnerability, the same fear of not being enough that you had harbored so deep inside.
And in that moment, it no longer mattered who was enough or not enough. All that mattered was that he was here. And so were you.
You kissed him then—softly, slowly, as if testing whether the world would allow such a moment of peace to exist. But his lips were insistent, and soon enough, the kiss deepened, your worries melting away with each touch, each press of his body against yours. The weight of your doubts lifted, replaced by something far more comforting, far more real.
In his arms, you were not lost. You were not a fleeting moment. You were everything.
And as the night wrapped itself around you both, the air no longer felt cold. It felt warm. It felt like home.


Caleb
It was almost absurd, how you could feel so much for someone, and yet, never have them see it. Caleb, your constant. The one who would always be there to crack a joke, to make you laugh when the world felt heavy. But as time passed, it became harder to pretend. Pretend that the ache in your chest was just something you could ignore, pretend that you could be content with the role of the background character, the one who never got the spotlight.
You stared at the ceiling, the dim glow of your phone still lingering in the darkness, his name burning through the cold night. You were so tired of pretending, tired of holding everything inside, locking it away like some precious treasure only you could see. But it was suffocating you, this secret love, this thing you never asked for but couldn’t escape.
The steady buzz of your phone in your hand felt like a pulse, like a lifeline, but also like a reminder of everything you couldn’t have. It hurt too much to answer. It always did. Because with Caleb, every conversation felt like an act of theater, a performance where you smiled and pretended to be happy, to be fine, when the truth was you were drowning. Drowning in a love that never had a chance to be returned, that was never meant to be returned.
Another message lit up the screen, and your chest tightened. "Pipsqueak, please answer me. I’m worried."
Worried. His words rang in your ears, his concern always just enough to make you feel seen, but never enough to pull you from the depths of your own feelings. You wanted to scream at him. To ask him why, after all this time, he still didn’t see you. Why couldn’t he see what was right in front of him?
But you couldn’t. Because if you did, you would break. And breaking meant losing him entirely. It meant letting go of the one piece of your life that was still solid, the one thing that still anchored you to the world.
With a trembling hand, you turned the phone face down on your nightstand, the silence between you now absolute. The emptiness felt suffocating, but you couldn’t take back what you had already done. You had locked him out, not just from the room, but from your heart. And maybe that was the best thing for both of you.
But as the hours passed, the weight of that decision grew heavier, until it felt unbearable.
Your phone buzzed again. It was him, and this time, you didn’t hesitate.
You picked it up, feeling that familiar pang of hope and fear coil in your chest. There was no turning back now. He was calling, and you—well, you couldn’t run anymore.
“Hey,” you whispered, almost too quietly. The sound of your voice was fragile, like it might shatter if you said too much.
“Y/N, you okay?” Caleb’s voice came through, low and concerned, but there was something more to it this time. Something you hadn’t noticed before—the way his voice lingered, the way it softened when he spoke your name.
“Yeah, just tired,” you replied, forcing a smile into your tone. It wasn’t enough to mask the sadness, but it would have to do.
There was a pause on the other end, and then he sighed. “You’re lying.”
You let out a small, bitter laugh. "Am I?"
“Yes,” he said simply. “I know you better than that.”
And for the first time, you felt the walls you’d carefully built between you begin to crack. Caleb, as oblivious as he was, somehow always knew when you were hiding something. It was frustrating, maddening even, but in that moment, you couldn’t deny it. His understanding of you, his ability to see through your armor, made everything feel even more impossible.
“I’m fine,” you said again, but it was weaker this time. "I just… I need some space, Caleb. It’s nothing. Really."
His voice softened, as though he could sense the lie even through the phone. “I don’t believe you.”
You were silent for a long moment, the weight of the conversation pressing in on you. There was so much you wanted to say, so much you had to say, but the words felt tangled in your throat.
“Caleb,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper, “I just—sometimes, I feel like I’m invisible to you. Like no matter how much I try to be there, it’s never enough.”
And there it was. The truth. The raw, aching truth that you had buried for so long.
You waited for him to speak, to laugh, to dismiss your feelings as something trivial. But instead, there was a silence so thick it felt suffocating.
And then, in the quiet, he finally spoke.
“I never meant to make you feel that way,” Caleb said, his voice unusually quiet, the usual teasing lilt replaced by something softer, more vulnerable. “I… I never saw it like that. But I should have. I should’ve seen how much you’ve always been there. How much I’ve taken you for granted.”
You swallowed, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill. You didn’t know how to respond. You didn’t know if you even could.
“I don’t want to lose you,” he continued, and there was something in his voice now that made your heart ache. “You’re not invisible to me, pips. You’ve never been.”
And in that moment, you allowed yourself to believe him, just for a little while.
You didn’t know what would happen next, what this would all mean, but for once, it didn’t matter. Caleb had seen you. Really seen you. And that was enough to keep you holding on.
“I’m here,” you whispered. “Always.”
And in the space between those words, something shifted, like the universe itself exhaled, allowing you both to breathe again.

#love and deepspace#lads rafayel#rafayel love and deepspace#rafayel x reader#rafayel x mc#lads xavier#xavier love and deepspace#xavier x reader#xavier x mc#lads zayne#zayne love and deepspace#zayne x reader#zayne x mc#lnds sylus#sylus love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#lads sylus#caleb love and deepspace#lads caleb#caleb x reader#caleb x mc#sylus x reader#sylus x mc#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace headcanons#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#loveanddeepspace
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bolted - sylus x reader
three weeks after you had broken up with sylus, you run into each other at a gala. his issue, however, is the fact that you came with a date.
!! nsfw, smut, fem!reader, exes to lovers, pwp, 18+
!!! not set in l&ds universe, reader not mc, pet names, cursing, might be angsty idk, jealousy, semi-public sex, multiple orgasms, cunnilingus, mirror sex, dirty talk, teasing, hair pulling, creampie, unprotected sex, fluff if u squint really hard, lightly proofread
wc. 2.4k
reblogs appreciated!
nsfw under the cut. minors dni
For the months you were dating Sylus, every one of your Friday nights had been reserved. Your own weekly ritual of being dressed in matching designer brands and attending various events: corporate galas, charity balls, and black-tie parties, to name a few.
For the past three weeks, every one of your Friday nights has been spent alone, completely free of plans.
Three Fridays have passed since you have shown your face at the social gatherings you so frequently attended. Three Fridays have passed since you officially broke up with Sylus.
Admittedly not your wisest decision. Sylus was a man of endless wealth, influence, and power. Your own status in society is not at all insignificant; but there is a part of you that still feels inferior.
Because you heard the cruel gossip about your relationship behind your back: whispers of she doesn’t belong here and Sylus would be better off with me. Because you felt as though you were holding him back. Because you were scared that he would be the one to leave first. And though you love him, you left because he deserves someone better.
But for the first time in three Fridays, you finally allow yourself to regret leaving. You allow yourself to miss your comfortable routine: Sylus buying an entirely new outfit for you to wear, sneaking out of parties together long before they were set to conclude, and ending the night on your couch with whichever takeout meal and show fit your mood that night.
The only reason you have the strength to drag yourself out of your weeks-long slump now is because of the invitation you received not long ago from some gentleman in your network, asking you to accompany him to tonight’s event: a fundraising gala at one of the city’s many national museums.
Of course, you have absolutely no interest in entertaining the man who invited you, you only know for certain that you would see Sylus tonight.
It doesn’t take long for you to lose your date. As adamant as he was about getting you to go with him, he proved himself to be quite inattentive now that he had gotten your agreement.
You are by yourself now, in spite of the crowd of event-goers drifting around where you stand in the extravagant ballroom, moving from one conversation to another.
The heels you wear add a few inches to your height. Not enough, however, as you can hardly see over the head of whichever wealthy socialite is in front of you.
You’re embarrassed to acknowledge the growing disappointment brewing in your chest as you fail to spot a familiar head of white hair.
Never mind the embarrassment of admitting that you are here for Sylus in the first place. You were the one that ended things, after all. What would you even say to him if you do happen to run into one another? Maybe seeing him would be enough. Enough for what? This was a bad idea, you begin to think.
That is, until you are suddenly very aware of Sylus’ presence.
It is first the undeniable heat radiating from something, someone, behind you. It’s then the penetrating scent of bourbon and cinnamon invading your senses. Rather, the scent of trouble.
“Looking for someone, Kitten?” It is finally his rich, husky voice that breaks through the crowd. Your heart skips a beat.
You don’t give him the satisfaction of turning to face him just yet. “I’m not your kitten.”
“Oh? But you are, don’t forget.” His voice becomes dangerous, and his sly hand sneaks itself around your waist from behind, “Done running away from me yet?”
Sighing, you turn, simultaneously facing him and shifting just enough to make his hand slip away.
“What do you want, Sylus?”
"You've always given me so much attitude.." He ignores your question. If he notices the desperation in your tone, he doesn’t show it. “Are you having fun going about your night with your arm around that moron?”
“He’s not a moron. And yes, I’m having plenty of fun, not that it’s of your concern.” You don’t know why you feel the need to defend your date or why you feel the need to lie to Sylus. After all, you weren’t having fun.
“Lies,” he immediately accuses. “Do not think that I have forgotten what you look like when you are being dishonest with me. Especially when you are doing so in an outfit that I bought you myself.”
The low purr of his voice easily sends shivers down your spine. He had gotten nearer as he spoke, his face now mere inches from your own, his eyes bearing into yours.
“Everything you do concerns me.” He comes impossibly closer, speaking directly into your ear now. “Besides, anybody here can tell, Sweetie, you are too out of that idiot’s league. Not your wisest decision.”
Sylus is right. No one can miss how your date’s eyes unfocus, zoned out, whenever you speak. Or how he never introduces you when he goes to greet the other party guests. He hadn’t even noticed you leaving his side and blending into the crowd just moments ago.
“I could say the same for you.” You counter. He pulls back, curious, “you don’t seem all that interested in your date either, and she’s your type, isn’t she.”
You don’t hide the fact that you’ve seen the various magazine articles and social media posts, all featuring Sylus and the new woman by his side as the main image. She’s obviously gorgeous. And, you discover with a quick web search, is also from an extremely well-off family with much more influence than you could imagine.
Though you hadn’t seen her tonight, you don’t need to be a genius to figure out that Sylus is here with her tonight as well.
“I have no romantic feelings towards that woman, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“But you’re still here with her.”
“She isn’t you, you know.”
“I didn’t know that mattered.”
Now it’s his turn to sigh at you. His turn to be the defeated one.
“Come home, Y/n,” his voice nearly begging as he gets straight to the point, “it’s always been you.”
How could you bring yourself to deny him like this?
You don’t know if it was Sylus’ persuasiveness or your own willingness to go back to being his that brought you to where you are now: locked inside one of the museum’s many private restrooms, the noises of music and chatter from the party now a distant murmur.
You’re also: bent over the bathroom’s sink, thanks to Sylus, with the skirt of your dress hiked up to your waist and your underwear pushed down around your knees.
“Sylus,” you whine, your legs feel weak with each lick he makes to your pussy.
“Keep still.” He commands, tightening the grip on both of your thighs that both kept you in place aa well as spread out for him.
“You taste so fucking good, Baby.” He doesn’t move away to speak and the breath from his hot mouth stays directly on your cunt as he does so, the heat eliciting a loud moan from you.
His tongue fucks into your hole from where he is crouched behind your open legs. The squelch of your arousal on his tongue and your moans fill the quiet atmosphere of the bathroom.
You feel him chuckle behind you before feeling the cold air hit your wet core at the sudden loss of contact.
“Y’know, for someone who was just playing so hard to get, you’re really enjoying this aren’t you, Kitten?” He teases, and though he stopped eating you out, his hands keep their position on your thighs, massaging them up and down.
“Shut up.” You push yourself back so that you were practically sat on his face. He, thankfully, doesn’t object and gives your clit some much needed attention, sucking hard.
You can feel your climax sneaking up on you and so can Sylus, recognizing the way your moans got breathy and the way you clenched around him when he inserts his fingers into you, intensifying the pressure between your thighs.
He continues sucking your clit, lightly grazing his teeth on your sensitive bud. The stimulation startles you at first, he’s never done this before, but it soon turns into euphoria as the pain mixes with pleasure.
It all becomes too much for you and your walls finally come crashing down on Sylus’ tongue. He takes you through your orgasm, making it last as long as possible, until you couldn’t hold yourself up any longer.
He’s quick to get up on his feet behind you. You immediately come to his understanding and slouch against him, letting him hold up all your weight.
“Look at us,” he gestures to your reflections in the mirror. You’re a mess: your dress straps cling to your upper arms and your face is covered in bliss. Sylus nonetheless towers tall behind you, annoyingly put together as he always is. “It’s like nothing ever changed between us, hm?”
You have to agree with him. The sight is not new to you, and you’re overcome with a sense of fondness for all the times you’ve stood like this before.
On the outside, your physical states are pure opposites. However, you know that right now, Sylus is as aroused as you are. You’re suddenly aware of the fact that he has yet to come.
Still in your post-orgasmic haze, you try your best to reach behind you to where you assume his crotch is.
“Already can’t get enough, Dear?” He teases you but even so, he moves back and pulls out his dick from his pants, simultaneously guiding your body so you’re bent over in the same position you were previously in and sliding his erection between your folds from behind.
“Relax. You can take it,” he coos before slamming into your walls without warning.
“Sylus!” You gasp at the intrusion. It’s a miracle that you even have the effort to scream his name, it was as if all your breath was taken away.
“Still so goddamn tight as I remember, Sweetie, I thought I told you to relax?” He begins to hammer his dick into your pussy, not sparing you and your sensitivity at all. You squeeze your eyes shut, and your moans and yelps with each thrust fill the room.
“Sy, ‘s too much!”
“You can handle it. After all, you wanted this.” His tip finds your g-spot and hits it at that same brutal pace. “Are you still thinking about that asshole that you came here with? Hm? Even as im fucking you like this? Have you forgotten him yet?”
In the midst of being fucked, it takes you a second to figure out what, or who, he’s talking about. The truth is that you had forgotten all about the other man once you entered the seclusion of the bathroom you are now in. You don’t get a chance to reply before he continues.
“Can he fuck you like I do? Do you think of me when he’s this deep inside of you?”
Your eyes widen at the crudeness of his words.
“I- never- we don’t-!” You’re quick to deny his accusations, albeit struggling to get the words out between moans.
“Spit it out, Princess. Are you saying he doesn’t fuck you at all?” His hips smack against yours, hard this time. “Or are you saying that his dick can’t go deep like mine can?”
As he interrogates you, a hand reaches down between your thighs and begins circling your clit. The stimulation is all too much, and you’re still unable to properly speak.
“Sylus-”
He takes a fistful of your hair and nudges your head up, forcing you to face the incriminating scene reflected in the mirror. “Answer me.”
You watch yourself shake your head rapidly, still being held up from your hair. “No! It’s not like that.. He and I never did it..”
“Oh yeah?” He still has the same smirk from earlier in the night on his face, but now his eyes are shrouded in a devious darkness. “That’s a good girl. If I had found out that he fucked you I might’ve had to kill him.”
He snorts, seeing your shocked expression. “I’m kidding sweetie,” he clarifies. Sylus then lets go of his hold on your hair and your head falls forward with more of his thrusts. “Now keep being my good girl and come for me.”
The exchange is pushed to the back of your mind and you’re reminded of the physical situation that you’re in.
Your eyes roll to the back of your head as your whole body jerks up and down from bouncing back from his.
You uncontrollably spasm as you cream around Sylus’ dick, squeezing around him just right. Overstimulated, your jaw hangs open as screams burst from your throat. Afterwards, you become fully limp in his hold.
“Fuck. So fuckin’ noisy, huh? You’re doing so good for me, sweet girl..”
You feel the exact moment he reaches his climax. He thrusts himself one last time into your sore cunt before you’re filled with his cum.
You stay there for a while, neither of you bothering to move.
After what feels like hours of standing still, Sylus finally pulls out of you. And last moan escapes your lips as he does so.
He kneels, pulling up your panties from their bunched up state around your ankles to over your sopping hole before any semen could leak out.
“You think you can keep it inside until we get home?” He asks before leaving a kiss on your clothed cunt and standing to fix your dress, erasing any evidence of your sexual encounter.
“And when are we getting home, exactly?” You don’t comment on the fact that he said ‘home’ as if it was the same place for you. As if nothing had happened between you two. You don’t comment because you want both of those things to be true.
“Now.” It isn’t a suggestion, nor a question, but a statement.
“Wait, you’re not staying until the gala ends?”
“No, Sweetie. We’re not staying until the gala ends.” He laughs as if it’s obvious, “we both know that I could buy out this whole fundraiser if I wanted to.”
“What about our dates?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re my date, and I’m yours.”
#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus smut#lads sylus#love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#lads x reader#lads#lnds x reader#lnds sylus#sylus fluff#sylus angst#sylus fic#lads fic#l&ds sylus#sylus#sylus love and deepspace#lnds#l&ds#sylus qin#love and deepspace fic
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If the pregnant MC is kidnapped by Sylus' enemies, Luke and Kieran don't know how to inform Sylus because they know how much he cares about MC and her babys. If MC miscarries her babys and falls unconscious because of what she went through there, what will happen when Sylus finds her, what will she feel when he takes her to the hospital, what will Mc feel when she wakes up? How will Sylus comfort her when she starts crying and how will he eventually take revenge on his enemies?
I think I've written this request before, but I really want to read this article from your perspective. I'm sorry if I bothered you by sending the request a second time.
when sylus enemies attack you causing you to have miscarriage

tags-angst,comforting,mentions of violence,guilt
(note-hi don’t worry it’s ok if u sent it a second time,it took me a while to write so that’s why I’m posting until now! I hope this is what you wanted 🤍)
────୨ৎ────
The room was dark, cold and the pain was unbearable. Your body ached with every breath, bruises spreading across your skin like ink stains and your mind struggled to keep up with the reality of your situation.
You had been taken, dragged from the safety of Sylus’s protection by enemies who were relentless in their cruelty. You had fought but they were too many and now, your body bore the cost of their violence.
But the worst pain wasn’t physical. It was the dull, nauseating sensation in your abdomen, the sinking, terrifying fear that something was deeply wrong.
Your vision blurred as you lay there on the cold concrete, your hands instinctively moving to your stomach, trembling as you realized what had been taken from you—not just your freedom but something far more precious.
The baby. The one thing you and Sylus had never fully planned but had begun to hope for, had begun to envision. The agony in your gut was matched only by the agony in your heart.
The door creaked open and heavy boots stomped into the room. The men—the ones who had done this—stood there, sneering at your helpless form, mocking your weakness. You barely heard their words through the haze of pain but their laughter cut through. Each chuckle was a reminder of your helplessness, of your inability to protect the life that had been growing inside you.
And then, there was a sound. A familiar, terrifyingly calm sound—the door slamming open, the faint hum of something electric, like restrained fury. Sylus.
His voice was cold, filled with a rage that he rarely showed. You couldn’t see him clearly but you heard the quiet menace in his tone, the way his words dripped with a deadly promise.
“Where. Is. She?”
There was no hesitation. You heard the scuffle, the brief yelp of one of your captors before everything went silent. Then, you felt his hands—warm, steady but trembling with suppressed anger—as he lifted you into his arms. His touch was gentle despite the tension radiating from him and for the first time since you’d been taken, you felt a flicker of safety.
He didn’t say a word as he carried you out, the sound of footsteps and the faint groans of the men behind him lost in the fog of your pain. You knew what this meant—he wouldn’t kill them now. Not yet. But they wouldn’t escape. Not after what they had done.
At the hospital, the lights were harsh, the sterile smell filling your senses as Sylus carried you inside. Nurses rushed to your side, the urgency in their movements sending a cold rush of fear through you. Your head lolled to the side, eyes searching for Sylus but all you saw was his face, stony and unreadable as they wheeled you away. His hand briefly touched yours before you were pulled into the emergency room and that touch was all that kept you from sinking completely into despair.
Time passed in fragments—flashes of doctors, machines beeping, cold hands pressing on your abdomen. You felt detached from your body, lost in the haze of pain and fear, until a voice broke through.
“I’m sorry.”
You blinked, trying to focus as the doctor stood by your bedside, their expression somber. Sylus was beside you, his posture rigid, his hand gripping yours tightly, almost painfully.
“I’m sorry” the doctor repeated, their voice softer now, filled with regret. “We did everything we could, but… you’ve lost the baby.”
The words hit you like a freight train. You stared at the doctor, unable to process the weight of what they had said. The baby… was gone? No. That couldn’t be true. It couldn’t.
“No…” you whispered, your voice trembling, barely audible. “No, I… I should have been stronger. I should have fought harder. I—”
But before you could finish, Sylus’s grip on your hand tightened and he turned to you, his face a storm of emotions you rarely saw. Anger, pain, guilt—it was all there, swirling beneath the surface of his usually controlled demeanor.
“Don’t” he snapped, his voice rough, almost breaking. “Don’t you dare blame yourself.”
You flinched at the intensity of his words, your tears spilling over as you tried to form some sort of response. “But I—I should’ve—”
“No” Sylus interrupted, his voice low but trembling with fury. “This isn’t your fault. It’s mine.” He looked away for a moment, his jaw clenched so tightly you thought it might break, his hands shaking now as he struggled to keep himself from unraveling.
“I should have been there” he continued, his voice raw with guilt. “I should’ve protected you. This happened because of me because of my enemies. I brought you into this life and I couldn’t even keep you safe. I…” His words faltered and he took a sharp breath, trying to regain his composure.
Your heart broke at the sight of him like this—Sylus, always so calm, so collected, now barely holding himself together. You had never seen him so vulnerable, so angry at himself and it only made the pain in your chest worse.
“I should have been there” he repeated, his voice softer now, filled with regret. “I failed you. I failed our baby.”
The tears flowed freely now and you shook your head, trying to tell him he was wrong, that it wasn’t his fault, but the words wouldn’t come. The grief, the guilt—it was all too much.
Sylus’s hand cupped your face, gently forcing you to look at him. His eyes, usually so cold and unreadable, were now filled with a deep, aching sadness. “Kitten” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I’ll make them pay. I swear to you, I’ll make them pay for this. But you… you have to know this wasn’t your fault.”
You leaned into his touch, your body shaking with sobs as the weight of the loss crashed over you. Sylus pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as if he could shield you from the pain, from the reality of what had been taken from you both.
The baby was gone. The future you had only just begun to imagine was gone and there was nothing either of you could do to change that. But in that moment, as Sylus held you, his own grief mixing with yours, you knew that you weren’t alone in this. He was there and no matter how much he blamed himself, no matter how much you blamed yourself, you had each other.
And for now, that had to be enough.
Luke and Kieran stood guard at your door, their shadows tall against the dim light of the hospital hallway. You knew Sylus trusted them-his two most loyal men-but it did little to ease the cold dread that had settled into your bones.
Sylus had left without a word but you knew where he had gone. You knew the kind of wrath that was brewing inside him, the rage he held back only for your sake and now, he was gone to unleash it.
The basement was cold and damp, the smell of mildew mixing with the stench of fear. The three men who had taken you were bound tightly to chairs, their heads slumped forward, blood dripping from their faces from the initial beatings Sylus had given them when he'd first found you.
Their bodies were bruised and broken but that was nothing compared to what was coming. Sylus stood in the shadows, silent, watching them as they stirred, slowly waking to the nightmare that awaited them.
One of the men groaned, his head lifting as he squinted through swollen eyes. "W-Where are we?"
Sylus stepped forward, his boots echoing against the concrete floor. His face was devoid of emotion, cold, calculating. He was no longer the man who had cradled you in his arms at the hospital, no longer the man who had tried to soothe your pain with soft words. This was a different side of him— ruthless, unrelenting, and out for blood.
"You know exactly where you are" Sylus said, his voice low, a dangerous calmness to it. He crouched down in front of the man, his dark eyes locking onto his with an intensity that sent a shiver down the man's spine.
"And you know exactly who I am."
The man's breathing quickened, panic flashing across his face as he realized who was standing before him. "P-Please, we didn't mean to-"
Before he could finish, Sylus backhanded him, the force of the blow snapping the man's head to the side. Blood splattered onto the ground, and the man whimpered, his body trembling.
"You didn't mean to what?" Sylus hissed, standing up slowly, towering over him. "You didn't mean to kidnap my fiancée? Didn't mean to hurt her? Didn't mean to kill my child?" His voice was deadly now, each word punctuated with a barely restrained fury.
The man sobbed, his words a jumbled mess of apologies and excuses. Sylus's eyes darkened as he turned his attention to the others. "You're all going to pay for what you did."
He walked over to a table lined with tools— knives, pliers, a blowtorch. The sight alone was enough to make the men scream in terror, their bodies jerking against their restraints as they tried in vain to free themselves. But there was no escape. Sylus had made sure of that.
He picked up a pair of pliers, testing the grip with a snap before walking back to the man he had hit. "You took something from me that I can never get back” Sylus said quietly, his tone almost conversational. "So, I'm going to take something from you."
With that, he grabbed the man's hand and forced his fingers apart. The man screamed as Sylus clamped the pliers around one of his fingers and, without hesitation, ripped the nail clean off. Blood poured from the wound as the man howled in agony, his body convulsing in the chair. Sylus didn't flinch, his eyes cold and focused as he repeated the process on the next finger, and the next.
"Stop! Please! Stop!" the man begged, tears streaming down his face but Sylus was unmoved.
"You don't get to beg" Sylus said, his voice low and deadly.
He moved to the next man, who was already sobbing, begging for mercy. Sylus picked up a knife and with a swift motion, he sliced across the man's cheek, deep enough to leave a permanent scar but not enough to kill him. It was slow, deliberate, designed to inflict as much pain as possible without granting them the mercy of death.
The man screamed, his cries echoing off the walls of the basement. Sylus barely blinked as he moved to the last man, the leader of the group. The one who had orchestrated the entire thing.
Sylus leaned down close, his voice a whisper in the man's ear. "You're going to suffer the most and when I'm done with you, you'll beg me for death."
He grabbed the blowtorch, flicking it on with a soft hiss. The man's eyes widened in terror, his body shaking uncontrollably as Sylus held the flame close to his skin, the heat searing his flesh. The smell of burning skin filled the air and the man's screams were deafening but Sylus didn't stop. He burned him, inch by inch, savoring every moment of the man's agony.
Hours passed and by the time Sylus was done, the men were unrecognizable, their bodies broken and mutilated beyond repair.
They were still alive but barely. Sylus stood over them, breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling with the adrenaline that still pumped through his veins. The cold satisfaction of revenge washed over him but it didn't erase the pain. It didn't bring back what they had taken.
He wiped the blood from his hands and walked out of the basement, leaving the men to rot in their own misery. There was no rush to finish them off. They would suffer until their last breath.
but sylus ? He would return to you.
#love and deepspace#lnds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#l&ds sylus#lads sylus#sylus#sylus x reader#sylus x you
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୨୧ THE LETTERS
In which caleb tries to prove to mc that he didn‘t want to leave her … with his mouth and very capable fingers.
at first, caleb can‘t believe what he found while deep cleaning the closet in his guest room. the room in his apartment in skyhaven in which you always stay during your visits. it was a box, neatly closed with a bow, and he just can‘t resist. he opens the box—and inside it he finds letters. multiple of them. he furrows his brows, a sharp wave of jealousy coursing through him. who did you write those letters to? but then he recognizes it.
his name scribbled on all of the envelopes.
caleb can‘t stop himself. he reaches for the first letter, but just when he wants to open it, your voice comes from the doorway.
„what are you doing?“
he turns to you, holding the letter up. „it has my name on it. so it‘s my right to open it.“
pure horror was written over your face, which makes him smile. especially when your face takes on the color of an overripe tomato. „give them to me! you were not supposed to see those.“
„why would you hoard them in my closet then?“ you try to grab the letter, but he holds his hand just outside your reach. when you jump, he lets out a laugh.
„I wrote those after … you were gone“, you admit after a few seconds. his laughter stops. his heart sinks. you gulp and avoid his gaze. „it … helped me. I thought … maybe I‘ll show them to you some day.“
when he sees the hurt crossing your face, the box lay forgotten. he could only focus on you. your hurt. the pain he caused you. it was as if someone was twisting a knife inside his chest.
„pips“, he croaks and reaches out, grazing your face with warm fingers. you lean into his touch, even though you know better. giving into him was inevitable, but that didn‘t make it smart. yet your body seems to decide on it‘s own when it comes to him.
„I didn‘t want to leave you, you know that.“
you nod.
„I need you to answer me, pips. I need to know that you understand.“
you can‘t. the letters and their content weigh heavy on your heart.
„then you leave me no choice“, he whispers, his touch suddenly rough. he pulls your chin back so you are forced to look into those deep purple eyes. it‘s almost too much to look into them. you don‘t want to see his hurt. it makes you question everything.
caleb weaves his other hand in your hair, holding you in place. you can‘t look away. he closes the distance between you; you can feel his breath on your lips. heat curses through you, waking a hunger inside you you don‘t recognize.
„tell me you understand“, he growls. „I would have never left you on my own accord. tell me that you believe me.“
„what if I don‘t?“, you retort.
his adams apple bobbs slightly. his tongue licks his lower lip. „then I‘m going to prove it to you.“
you furrow your brows. „I don‘t think that‘s necessary.“
„I disagree.“ his hand still in your hair, he pulls it slightly. your breath hitches. „let me show you, pips. let me show you how desperately I wanted to come back to you.“
he‘s asking for your permission, you realize. he was rough around the edges and he always did what he thought was right—but not this time. this time he asks. he waits.
caleb is just inches from your face, his nearness closing in on you, his hands on your face, in your hair. you missed him. you missed him despite being hurt, you missed him so badly you almost broke when he was gone. yes, he has too many secrets, and yes, you hate him for it … but in this moment you just can‘t turn your back on him. so the only thing you can do is whisper: „yes.“
caleb sighs, leaning his forehead against yours. „finally.“
and then his restraint vanishes.
next thing you know, he pulls you towards him, crushing his mouth to his. a muffled moan escapes your lips, which he uses to push his tounge inside your mouth. he licks inside your mouth, deepening the kiss, all while pushing you towards the bed. you feel the corner of the bed in the hollow of your knees, and suddenly caleb breaks the kiss. then he goes down on his knees.
„caleb“, you whisper.
he looks up to through thick lashes, with purple eyes, that grow darker, when he moves his hands up your legs. „you allowed me. you said yes. take it back and I‘ll stop. but I would rather …“ he leans against your lap, nestling against your body. your knees start to feel weak, as he looks up again.
„don‘t stop.“
then his hands are under your skirt, almost greedy in the way he grabs your ass. he slaps it and you take in a sharp breath. there it is again, his languish smile. the one that always made your insides turn upside down. in one swift motion he shoves your skirt up, your panties down, and there is no time to feel shame or anything else, because he buries his head between your legs.
with one hand he pushes you down on the bed, then he takes your legs over each of his shoulders while holding you in place. the first lick of his tongue on your clit lets a moan escape your lips. you grab one of his pillows and bury your face in it. one second later it‘s gone and thrown against the wall. when you cross his gaze, anger is written in his eyes.
„let me hear what I do to you“, he demands.
then his mouth is on you again, opening your legs with two strong hands, licking you in harsh strokes.
„oh my god.“ you can‘t hold the words back, throwing your head back and bucking your hips closer to him.
„damn right.“ you feel his words on you. then you bury your hand in his soft hair, pulling it roughly.
„stop talking.“
„as you wish, pips.“
he sucks on your clit and you see stars. then his finger enters you in one slow motion. a second one that is stretching you. and when he curves them slightly, your hips buck from the bed. he pushes you back down with his other hand, and then his know-it-all mouth and his capable fingers work in unison, getting you closer and closer to the edge.
„tell me you understand now“, he demands.
fuck, he should use his mouth for licking you, not ordering you around. but you are too close, and he feels too good and …
„god, yes. yes, I understand that you never intended to leave me“, you grit out. „now finish what you started or I‘ll just do it myself.“
you can feel his arrogant smile against your clit, but before he can say anything else, you push his head back down, and his tongue is there again, and his fingers move in a more rapid pace. you move against him, taking what you need, and then there‘s a wave of lust crushing over you. you grab onto him, his arm feels too hard under your touch, but there‘s no more room for questions in your head, theres only the highest of highs, which caleb fully takes advantage of. when you come, you chant his name, and you can hear his satisfied noises. he likes it when you say his name when you come.
when you come back down, he raises himself from the floor and onto bed. you hold your breath as he pushes the fingers, that were just inside you, into his mouth and licks them slowly. your heart almost leaps out of your chest at the sight. you just came, but this alone could get you going again.
„well, you proved your point.“
„oh, pips.“ he comes onto you, both of his arms cage you. he runs his nose slowly across your own, then along your jaw. finally his mouth rests against yours, sending another heatwave through you. „I just got started.“
#love and deepspace caleb#caleb smut#l&ds caleb#caleb fanfic#lads caleb#caleb x mc#caleb x you#caleb x reader#caleb love and deepspace#caleb lnds#love and deepspace smut#love and deepspace caleb smut
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Fill the void
Pairing : Caleb x non MC reader Content :rough sex , aphrodisiac sex , oral sex (fem receiving) , slight bondage, inappropriate use of evol , slight exhibitionism, unprotected sex, MC's cameo , reader evol is mentioned, porn with plot , creampie (use protection guys ) Wk: 6.9 k (MF *side eye* ) Synopsis : when you fled on that island to save your comrade you didn't expect it to turn into forced vacation with the very reason of your jealousy. Part 2 to Heartless A/N: this part 2 wasnt planned but Caleb got me feeling some type of way . I need this man to rail me on top of a desk with his uniform still on and Call out my name playing in repeat in the BG. (Zayne be filling papers divorce after he heard me say that) Now playing: Fill the void by The weeknd and Lily Rose Depp.
Masterlist
Fill the void.
Maybe that’s what you were desperately trying to do with Caleb’s presence in your life. Fill the enormous void in your heart and soul.
You didn’t know who avoided who at this point. Was it you or him? Who cared, anyway? He had his pipsqueak back. You just minded your own life and business now.
“It seems there isn’t anything wrong with that area,” you heard Commander Ash’s voice crackle through your headset.
“They must be hiding. Keep looking,” you replied, voice cool and controlled as your eyes scanned the real-time images from his UAV camera feed.
Usually, missions involving Protocurve anomalies fell under the Hunter Association’s jurisdiction, but the unusual readings near the Farspace Fleet-controlled zone warranted your team’s intervention. The fluctuations were too erratic, too dangerous to ignore.
A sudden crash broke through the static, followed by a sharp burst of white noise. Then, silence.
“Commander Ash! Can you hear me?” Your voice pitched higher as your fingers scrambled over the console. “Ash, respond!”
No answer.
Shit.
Ripping the headset off, you spun out of the command room, ignoring the shouts of other soldiers as they tried to stop you.
“Lieutenant General! Protocol requires—”
“I need Hershley 4543 prepped and ready for immediate departure!” you barked, cutting them off as you stormed into the hangar.
“Ma’am, that’s against—” the mechanic stammered, stepping forward.
“No buts! One of our own is out there, and I am not leaving him behind,” you snapped, your voice razor-sharp, thought your hands were trembling betraying the panic bubbling just beneath your façade.
“Make it two.”
The mechanic hesitated for a moment, then nodded, shrinking under your unwavering gaze. “Understood. We’ll have it ready in five.”
…*...*...*...*...*...*...
You climbed into the cockpit of the Hershley 4543 -a sleek reconnaissance aircraft equipped with stealth capabilities and advanced tracking systems. The roar of the engines was deafening, but it grounded you. You went through the pre-flight checks with practiced efficiency, hands flying over the controls as the team cleared you for takeoff.
Rushing into danger like this was beyond reckless. You knew that. But Commander Ash was an ally -a friend even, though you’d never admit it aloud.
“Flight control to LTG,” a voice crackled in your ear. “Tracking a spike in Protocurve readings at your target location. You sure about this?”
You flicked the comm switch. “I’ll handle it. Just keep the airspace clear.”
…*...*...*...*...*...
The flight to the designated zone was uneventful—eerily so. The clouds parted to reveal an expanse of barren terrain. From the air, everything seemed peaceful. Too peaceful.
You adjusted the thermal imaging on your monitor, scanning for any sign of Ash or the Wanderer he’d been tracking. The anomaly readings were spiking, but there was no visual confirmation.
“Come on, Ash. Where are you?” you muttered under your breath, gripping the controls tighter.
A loud thud made your ears perk up , your senses in high alert as you heard a faint curse.
What the actual fuck ? you quickly took off your headset ,shifting the commands on automatic pilot mode before standing up to explore what on earth was happening in the back of your plane.
Your steps were as silent as the plane 2 minutes ago and you were starting to think the curse you heard earlier was just a trick of your imagination .As you approached the source of the noise , your right hand reached for your sidearm.
You opened the curtain separating the rest of the plane from the cockpit ,gun raised and ready only for your eyes to fall on that hunter girl .
What was Caleb's pipsqueak doing aboard an Airforce plane ?
“What the fuck are you doing here?” You heard your voice said , your eyebrows furrowing in a confused frown that had the girl in front of you gasping.
You didn't lower your gun even as she scrambled onto her feet, her hands raised in surrender.
“Don't shoot , I am not an enemy” her voice was a pitched squeal that had your irritated nerves fraying further.
“This is an Air Force operation , why are you here?” You asked after finally lowering your gun , the sigh of relief that left her lips didn't escape you.
“I heard there is a wanderer involved and I happen to be a hunter so I thought I could help”
You scoffed at her words before placing your gun back in the holster.
“And you think boarding without permission on an airplane during an important mission is helping” you hummed sarcastically as you made your way back to the cockpit
Her hands curled into fists at your blatant dismissal , a small frown etched on her features as she followed closely behind you .
“I am here to help” she repeated, her voice edged with an hint of frustration “not to be a burden”
“Just you standing there and breathing is already a burden for me” you bit back before placing your headset back on, though your tone was cool and controlled the venom dripping from your words stung harder than she cared to admit .
Just her existence was already a burden you thought, eyes flickng back to the faint signal that appeared on your screen.
If she was the least offended by your words, she didn't show it . After all, you were known among the Farspace fleet for your temper and sharp tongue. And despite being there only for a short amount of time , she seemed to have already picked up that information.
She leaned against your seat to peer up over your shoulder at the monitoring screen where you could see the faint signal of Ash's locator
What does she think she's doing ? The poisonous look you gave her would have probably sent her 6ft deep underground if only looks could kill but it didn't even make her flinch.
“If you're planning to tag along stay out of my sight unless you want to find out what happens when you jump off a plane without parachute” your icy tone and the not so subtle menace in your words made her gulp audibly but she didn't leave as you hoped, instead to your growing irritation she plopped herself in the co-pilot seat beside you , her eyes scanning over the command board like a curious child.
Just what the heck is wrong with her ?
Whatever ! you shook your head before focusing back on the beeping signal of Ash's locator on your screen
As long as she kept her mouth shut , Everything would be fine . You'd just have to pretend she wasn't there.
But of course she wouldn't keep her mouth shut .
“I can sense something” she whispered mostly to herself as she stared at the beeping hunter watch on her wrist but it didn't escape your ears .
Your eyes flickered towards her for a fraction of second before refocusing back on the monitoring screen where you could see how much closer you were getting to Ash's location .
“Hold tight, hunter. We are about to land” you warned her before preparing for the descent.
She scrambled onto her seat, her hands gripping the armrest for dear life . The sight almost pulled a small smirk from you but you quickly schooled your features back in their usual stoic mask .
…*...*...*...*...*...
Even as you landed on the small island where Ash’s coordinates led you , everything was still peaceful, way too peaceful. Though that hunter girl insisted on the fact she could sense something, your surroundings were nothing short but the picture perfect of a small tropical paradise.
“It must be here” you heard her whisper to herself, her feet pacing back and forth on the shimmering white colored sand as she stared at that damn watch.
“Stop pacing around like that , it's making me dizzy” you finally snapped, making her freeze in her tracks to look at you .
“The signal said that Ash is there” you pointed at the dense forest at the edge of the beach
“But the fluctuations are coming from this wa-”
“We don't give a fuck about the fluctuations” you cut her off ,your voice icy cold as you stepped closer to her “we are here to save my friend and not to play hunter x hunter so either you stay here and get killed by whatever is lurking on this island or you come with me”
She contemplated your words for a moment, her teeth nibbling at the plush of her bottom lip for a moment before she finally spoke
“Go , I'll manage alone” not the answer you expected but if she seemed determined to find this wanderer .
“Very well” you let out a faint chuckle before turning on your heels to head towards the forest where you'll probably find Ash without sparing her a second glance
What ? She thought you'd bring her by a leash after you . She was a grown ass woman that could perfectly manage herself. Well you hope
If anything happens to her , Caleb will be devastated though. That torturing voice muttered in your ear .
Fuck no .
You weren't her damn babysitter and you didn't give a fuck about what Caleb thought or how would he feel if something happened to her . Hell you didn't even give a damn about Caleb anymore.
But even as you told yourself that , your legs were already jogging back to where you left her
“Damn hunter” you muttered as your searched frantically on the beach but she was nowhere to be found , only the clear blue seawater and dusty sand was looking back at you .
Sorry Ash but hunter first then I'll save your ass.
…*...*...*...*...*...
You didn't know for how long you've been roaming endlessly on that island , searching for Ash and that hardheaded hunter. You could easily leave her to perish there . After all it would be quite the sweet revenge to finally satisfy your petty jealousy but you weren't letting anyone die on your watch, not today .
You can always look away. that same persistent voice whispered but you quickly shook it off.
The dead branches creaked beneath your feet as you walked further into the forest , the eerily silence almost suffocating. It was too quiet to be normal. Not even a bird chirping sound ,That was beyond odd.
A faint rustling made your ears perk up , your hand already pointing the gun in whatever direction it came from but to your surprise and relief you found the hunter girl and Ash attached and suspended like sausages by the vines.
No they weren't vines .
“Lieutenant don't get any closer” Ash shouted, his voice laced with concern while the hunter was trying hard kick off those viscous tentacles around her legs .
You raised your gun to shoot but she interrupted you .
“This doesn't work on them, see” she gestured to her gun laying on the grassy ground “wasted my whole magazine while trying to hit it” she sighed , her hands hanging loosely beside her head.
You cursed lowly under your breath before grabbing the blade hidden in your boot to attempt to cut off those damn tentacles like vines or whatever they were.
“Why are you here , Lieutenant?” Ash asked, earning a dirty glare from you .
“Saving your ass, of course” you let through gritted teeth before slashing through the vines to free him.
He fell on the ground with a loud thud , his gloved hand reaching out to massage his head that got hit at the fall.
You stepped over his body to cut off the restraints still curled around the hunter girl. She fell flat on her ass with a small gasp before sitting up.
“Let's not hang around for too long” you suggested already helping Ash standing to his feet
But you knew by the way she was observing the weird vines-like tentacles you would definitely hang around for a while.
“I've never seen a wanderer like that” she whispered fascinately , her hands already reaching out to touch it but you stopped her halfway.
“So what?” You scowled, grabbing her wrist to stop her from touching the weird object “new kind of wanderers appears everyday it's not the moment to play mad scientist, hunter” you tugged her along wanting to get out of this island as soon as possible.
“But shouldn't we kill it?” She asked while you dragged her the further away possible from this wanderer .
“That wasn't our mission, Commander Ash was sent in reconnaissance and I went out of my way to save him” you explained not sparing her a glance while you navigated through the dense foliage with Ash trailing behind you.
She seemed to understand your point thought the unimpressed look she gave you made you want to abandon her in this wanderers infested island.
Yeah maybe you should do that .
But as you were concocting a plan to secretly ditch her and fly away with Ash in your head , A shrieking sound made you grab your gun quickly, eyes roaming around the tall trees as you and Ash almost sandwiched the hunter girl between your bodies , senses in high alert.
“Stay right behind me and don't move” you warned her , your voice low and controlled as your eyes scanned the surroundings area searching for any signs danger.
And then it came , from above a dragon-like wanderer surged from nowhere, his clawed limbs aiming straight toward the hunter girl behind you.
You quickly spun her around to fire at the beast but it dodged your attack with maddening ease.
Fuck.
“Another one!?” you heard her whisper in a ragged voice.
“An enormous one apparently” you spat before recharging your gun.
The dragon wanderer roared again before surging forward, his attack still aimed at the hunter girl.
Just what the fuck did it wanted from her ?
You and Ash continued to shoot at it but it seemed useless , the bullet ricocheted against his scales covered skin with ease.
Shit ,at this rate you'd have to use your evol.
You pulled on the trigger only to realize you no longer had bullets.
Crap
“Commander” you looked over Ash who was hiding behind a tree.
He shook his head , his own magazine empty.
Fuck what do we do ? You looked down at the grass covered ground your mind racing a mile per minutes.
“Maybe I can try to resonate with it” the hunter girl suggested making your gaze snap back at her.
“You have the resonance evol” you and Ash exclaimed at the same time making her look at you with a puzzled gaze .
“Yeah” she murmured, her head tilting slightly to the side in confusion .
You exchanged a knowing look with Ash , your mind conveying the same thoughts .
You'll have to use your evol . Unlike you two Ash wasnt an evolver and your evol , well you hated it or to be more franc you hated to use it because things always ended up spiralling out of control when you did.
But this time you didn't have any other choice and even if you absolutely despised this hunter you couldn't let her die .
Don't get you wrong , if she die it might look bad for your career.
“I am not going to ask you to trust me because I know you don’t and to be honest I do not either so are you ready to risk your life to get out of here Miss hunter?” You asked with an outstretched hand .
An invitation, a deal for the survival of you 3.
She looked longly at your hand before grasping it.
“well ,it's not like I have any other choice” she breathed out before squeezing your hand.
You let an half hearted chuckle before yanking her to her feet to step out from behind the tree you were hiding behind .
You heard the shrieking sound again before catching a glimpse of the dragon surging towards where you were standing .
You can do this. Don't think about the experiment , the thunder , the electroshocks.
Your eyes closed as you felt the burst of energy ran through your body , images of a young girl that wasn't you flashing through your eyes .
Caleb ? Why was he in those memories that weren't yours?
You heard the clap of thunder before the shrieking sound grew louder . Another clap , louder than the previous one and the shrieking sound turned into a faint howl.
You heard a distant call of your name but you couldn't respond, the image in front of you making your gut twist .
Caleb was gently cradling her cheeks as he wiped her tears . So this was what love feel like ?
You could feel everything: how his warm hands glided over her face , the faint words of reassurances he whispered to her , the light kisses he left against her temple . You could feel it all and it hurts, it hurts so bad it had you sinking on your knees.
So this is what it feels like to be loved ?
The sting of a slap wrenched you out of this loop of torture. The heart wrenching images of Caleb consoling his pipsqueak shattering in your mind .
You blinked your vision back only to see the hunter and Ash's concerned faces looking down at you .
“What happened?” You heard yourself ask, your voice sounded hoarse as your eyes roamed around to take on your surroundings . What was once a lush land of tree and foliage was now burned down to ashes.
“Where's the wanderer?” You questioned them
“Dead,” the hunter girl replied in a small and distant voice ,her eyes looking down in a way you didn't like at all .
“2 thunderclap was all it took” Ash added while avoiding your gaze
Why were they acting so strangely?
You hummed in response before standing up . Half of the forest was burned down leaving the giant wanderer laying on the center of it.
You approached it slowly , your steps deliberate as Ash and the hunter observed you from behind , their mind still struggling to comprehend what just happened.
When you were at the dead wanderer's level you crouched down to observe it more closely. A disgusting smell of burnt flesh was coming out of it , the nauseating scent so strong it had you pinching your nose .
But as you observed it ,a glowing light caught your attention making You lean in to take a closer look.
Only when you reached to touch it ,it exploded in a cloud of pink smoke that surrounded you.
You coughed out as you waved it off with your hands but only one whiff made your head spiral uncontrollably. It smelled so addictively good , the piney scent reminding you of Caleb ?
Huh? you quickly shook off your head ,hoping the smell would disappear but it persisted making your mind grow hazier by the seconds.
“Lieutenant” Ash shouted making your eyes snap back to his form who was already jogging towards where you were standing
“We need to leave” he breathed out making you nod in agreement
“Are you alright?” He asked , eyes squinting to observe you more closely, taking in the unusual flush of your cheeks.
“You are right let's go”
“Why wouldn't I be?” You retorted ,voice tenser than you intended. You internally winced at how his face fell at your harsh tone, his eyes darting away awkwardly.
“Let's just get the hell out of this island ” you added with one last glance at the wanderer’s corpse before starting walking ahead
.
Ash followed closely behind you , often shooting concerned glances your way as you headed back to the airplane.
Once inside your case worsened further . You felt your body growing more heated by the seconds, your tie feeling too tight around your neck.
You loosened it before running an hand through your hair . Miss hunter (that was the new nickname you gave her) keep shooting you curious glances along with Ash , finding your fidgeting unusual even for the short amount of time she has spent with you.
“Are we arriving soon?” You asked for the nth time, heavy pants leaving your parted lips as you leaned back in your seat.
Why did it feel so hot in here?
“We'll be landing in approximately 32 minutes” Ash responded to your question
32 minutes . that was far too long .You needed to breathe, to drink water , to see Caleb
Caleb ? no , not Caleb
“Fuck” you breathed out before taking off your jacket . The heat feeling too unbearable .
“Are you sure you're alright?” You heard the hunter ask again ,a hint of concern lacing her tone as she watched you struggle with unbuttoning the top 2 buttons of your shirt.
“I am fine” you replied but the way your head was spinning uncontrollably was clearly proving you wrong.
You brushed it off as a side effect of whatever that pink smoke was but when you landed it only worsened to the point you were stumbling toward your office room, leaving the debriefing to Commander Ash .
You still felt like you were burning up , every fiber of your being screaming for a man who didn't even want you need you the way you did.
You closed the door shut before walking over your chair to plop yourself on it.
“What have you done to me Caleb?” You sighed as you leaned your head against your chair , your eyes looking up at the white ceiling as if it had the answers to your questions but it didn't. No one did .
You let out another heavy sigh before discarding your tie on your desk to see if you'd finally breathe properly .
Just as you thought you might be getting some rest from this unbearable heat that have been creeping up on your body your door fled open revealing an angry Caleb .
The sight of him , especially mad made your whole body throb with an intensity that should be concerning but your mind was way too clouded to care.
He stepped closer to your desk , the clicking sounds of his boots along with your thumping heartbeat the only sounds registering in your mind.
“What makes you think taking her on such a dangerous mission was a good idea ?” You heard him say , his voice barely able to contain his anger.
His words cut sharply through your daze , your eyes blinking back to focus on anything but the way his face looked so distractingly attractive
“I didn't take her anywhere” you replied, your voice sounding way too calm and steady for someone who was literally burning in the inside “your pipsqueak boarded on that plane without permission like a grown up” you added earning a scoff from him .
“You expect me to believe she managed to pass all those security guards to board on a plane with you out of all people” he leaned in to rest his hands on your desk , his eyes shining with a possessive gleam that wasnt directed at you but got your heart rate spiking nonetheless .
“What ?” You tilted your head mockingly before raising from your seat to lean closer towards him “you expected me to put a gun on her temple to force her fly away with me on an wanderer infested island only to come back unscathed” you added in a heated whisper against his ear that had his jaw clenching .
“Think wisely Caleb” You scoffed before stepping away from him , attempting to put some distance between you , to quell down the hunger that stocked further inside you the more you inhaled the addictive scent of his cologne .
But Caleb wouldn't let you off the hook this easily . As you walked beside him to head to your office door , he pulled you towards him by wrapping his hand around your wrist.
An embarrassing squeal left your parted lips as you felt your back hit the wooden material of your desk .
“Have I ever told you that jealousy looks awful on you , Lieutenant?” You felt the ghost of his lips against your heated skin as he whispered the words against your neck .
“T-this has nothing to do with jealousy” you heaved out , already panting while he hasn't even touched you yet .
“It doesn't hm?” He purred against the soft flesh of your neck before biting on it hard enough to have you clawing at the edge of the desk “then why have you been avoiding me?”
The question made your eyes widen the suddenness of it too abrupt for your scrambled mind to process .
“Tell me , lieutenant” he pressed, his lips leaving a gentle kiss on the bruised skin he bit earlier .
“You have your pipsqueak back our deal is supposed to be over” you managed to get out between feverish pants.
The flash of disappointment you saw through his eyes had your resolve faltering but the fragment of memories you saw when you resonated with the hunter earlier strengthened it further .
Don't get caught up in illusions. This man wasn't yours.
The realization made a burst of anger spread throughout you , one that had you yanking his hair harshly until your lips crashed against his, all teeth and tongue , drinking him in like a thirsty man in desert that finally found water. Because he was your water , your light , a light that was bound to leave you .
A small hushed plea left your mouth as he parted his lips from yours to trail kisses down on your neck. His hands were everywhere , caressing any inch of smooth skin he could reach
Caleb kissed you back with the same fervor, his gloved hand wrapping lightly around your throat as his mouth devoured yours with a feral intensity. It was messy depraved and desperate.
Your own hands reached out to unbuckle his belt but he stopped you halfway , his hand moving swiftly to bound your wrists with your own discarded tie.
“No touching this time Lieutenant” he taunted, cupping your chin to make you look up at him , the feral gleam in his purple eyes making your cunt throb harder.
“Today you're all mine” he whispered before capturing your mouth in another heated kiss.
How you wished you could be his forever but this would never happen. You were just a sinner and he was your worst sin. The one who will drag you through the pits of hell.
The small kiss he left on your nose was the last thing you felt before he slid down to his knees in front of you , his large hands spreading your legs apart as you tried to steady yourself on top of the desk despite your bound wrists.
His fingers unzipped your pants before sliding them off you , leaving your legs bare for his hungry gaze to admire.
How he has missed this view .
“Look at her” he looked up at you as he ran a gloved thumb along your covered slit “so wet f'me already”
“Still as beautiful as ever , Lieutenant” you heard him whisper in awe, the compliment making you feel even dizzier while your cunt fluttered uncontrollably at his praises .
You could feel his infuriating smirk against your plush fold through the flimsy material of your panties . The way he was so close but so far away at the same time drove you wild in the best way possible.
“Caleb” you whimpered out , your pleading eyes looking down at him in an half hearted glare that made his cock twitch.
“What?” He smirked before peeking the drenched material of your panties in a way that had you throwing your head back .
“What do you need , darling?” The sound of him calling you darling made your hips buck against his face , the sinful moan escaping your lips sounding like music to his ear.
“I need you” the words felt more like a confession than anything and if it wasn't for that weird wanderer based substance in your system you'd probably feel pathetic for baring your soul to him like this but right now as his face was resting between your legs seconds away from feasting ,you didn't give a damn.
The regrets and sermons would come later when you were no longer aching and panting from him .
The heat of Caleb's mouth pulled you out of your musings, the overwhelming sensation making you cry out loud . He hasn't even bothered to take off your ruined panties , his mouth latching onto the flimsy material like he was starving.
He was merciless, the relentless pace making you squeal.
“Oh fuck just like that” you moaned, not even ashamed of the sounds you were making. His tongue rolled over your swollen bud over and over until you were practically in tears .
When you felt like you'd finally reach heaven ,a knock to your door made him stop, his eyes looking up to take in your form.
And shit. The sight of you spread out on your desk with your shirt half buttoned, your skin flushed with heat , panting with tears clinging to your waterline almost had him cumming in his pants .
Such a sight to behold and all for him to see.
Another knock on the door made him let out a small growl against you , clearly not pleased by being interrupted .
“Lieutenant” you heard a worried voice said from the other side “can I come in?”
Commander Ash? Your ears perked up .
Shit shit shit why is here ?
You looked down at Caleb who was already back to work , his fingers finally pulling your ruined panties to the side to suck , lick and nip at your sensitive flesh while you tried your best to stay quiet and gather your thoughts
“Lieutenant” Ash knocked once again “are you alright in there?” his voice was growing somewhat more restless.
“Respond darling” you felt Caleb's nip gently at your clit before looking up at you from where he was kneeling “it's so rude to leave someone hanging hm?” He spat right on your entrance before slurping down the mess.
“ngh_” the sight of him looking so devilishly at you nearly had you cumming right there on his face but he purposely slowed down his pace to maddening kitten licks so you would focus on responding Ash.
But that only made you more restless and frustrated .
“I am fine” you snapped , voice laced with frustration while the man below faintly chuckled before rewarding you with a flick of his tongue that made you groan .
You fought against your restraints so at least you would cover your mouth to muffle your sounds but no matter how hard you tried the knot wouldn't loosen .
Handsome bastard.
“Are you sure?” you heard Ash said , the confusion note in his tone not escaping Caleb's ears.
“You don't really sound well” the sound of the creaking handle made your heart rate pick up ,your stomach curling into knots with a mixture of fear and arousal that has fresh waves of your beading juices gushing around Caleb's tongue.
You didn't lock the door and he could barge in at any moment.
“Dirty girl” he muttered faintly against your plush folds , sticking strands connecting his lips to your pussy .
You bit down on your lips to not let out a loud moan , the squelching sounds of your cunt along with your barely concealed moans leaving no doubt of what was happening inside there . Thought one thing was clear , Ash was clearly wrestling with the handle that wouldn't budge Thanks to Caleb's evol.
“I am fine truly” you attempted to speak again but the way Caleb was making out with your lips below while his gloved hand rubbed tight circles around your clit made your words came out like breathy whimpers. “Just a bit busy”
You really hoped Ash would get the memo and get the fuck out here before you combusted .
“Ok then” he said, his tone sounding a tad disappointed “I'll see around Lieutenant”
Yeah you'll see her around now go .
You felt a wave of relief wash over you as the sound of Ash's eloigning footsteps finally disappeared leaving only you and the smirking man still buried nose deep between your thighs.
“You're such a dirty little thing , Lieutenant” he rasped out , flicking your clit one last time before raising to his full height .
“And you're such a tease” you scowled before feeling him unbound your wrists.
As soon as they were free you tugged him by his tie to capture his lips in a messy kiss , your mouth sucking lewdly on his tongue , tasting yourself on him.
“We both know you love that tease, darling” he mumbled out between kisses
“No I hate you” you denied ,your grip tightening hard enough on his tie to make him lightheaded and the fucked whimper that left his mouth as you did so made your cunt howl his name in morse code.
If only he knew how right he was
You could feel every hard planes of his body against yours ,even through the material of your half off uniform shirt , the intoxicating scent of his cologne making your head spin.
"Well , we can't say the same about your slutty pussy ,Lieutenant” he panted out with a smirk, his hands gripping your hips so hard they'd probably leave marks.
His words had your cheeks flaming a deeper shade of red but the way you felt your little bundle throb only proved his point
"Unlike you_" he slid his hand down to toy with your already sensitive clit "she's not a smartass" a silent scream left your lips as he curled one thick finger inside your gummy walls .
Your reached for his belt once again and this time he let you had your way, too busy eating out your face and fingering your cunt to stop your wandering hands.
Just this once . You heard this voice whisper again .
Caleb's head fell against your shoulder when he felt your soft hand wrap around his shaft to pump it slowly. Your pace matching his own .
It was hot and heavy in your hand, the leaking precum coating your palm in a sticky mess.
He bit down on the plush skin on your shoulder to muffle his sounds , his hips thrusting in time with your movements while his fingers massaged this spot in your walls over and over
Wanting to get your revenge on the stunt he pulled on you earlier , you slowed down your pace until you could hear his muffled whimpers against your shoulder.
“What's wrong?” You cooed , leaning your head back to stare at him , his cheeks were flushed the prettiest shade of pink , his hair tousled from your ministrations , his kiss bitten lips parted open to let out the hottest sounds you’ve ever heard .
You must been smiling too widely for his taste because the feral glare he shot you made you anything but scared , it only had you more turned on than ever.
But as always Caleb wouldn't let you savor your victory for too long , using his evol as the awful bastard he was to manipulate your hands until they were bound behind your back once again, his fingers slipping out of you with a lewd squelch.
“Nothing's wrong Lieutenant” he rasped out before pulling your legs to wrap tighter around his waist , his pinkish tip teasing your entrance.
“Just thinking about how hard_” he punctuated his words with a rough thrust that had you clawing at his shoulders , the sensation of him stretching your insides too overwhelming. “_I am going to take you” he added in a heated whisper before setting a brutal pace that had your desk shaking maddeningly , important papers scattering on the floor in a mess you'd have to worry about later.
Caleb's hips were merciless, fucking up into you like he hated your gut (as if he wasn't deep in them) . You clung to his uniform jacket sleeve for dear life , afraid you might slip but with how sandwiched you were between the wooden desk and his body you shouldn't be worrying about that.
“Oh fuck” you threw your head back when you felt him hit that exact spot that has you seeing stars , body arching into his to bring him closer. Your hand grabbed at his tie to pull him closer to you as his hips kept pistonning into yours .
“Yeah let me hear you, darling” he placed one hand on the desk beside you while the other pulled your leg over his hip to reach even deeper into you.
Every forceful thrust planted on the bulleyes of your G-spot has your grip tightening on his tie hard enough he could now see white spots blurring his vision .
You were gonna be the death of him , (literally) .
The smell of sex and skin slapping sounds filled the room along with your scream of pleasure and his breathy groans as he literally wrecked you , molding your insides to his shaft until all you can think about was him and only him .
“You squeeze me s’tight” he groaned against your neck , his hips not easing his pace for a second , not when your greedy pussy was sucking him back in so perfectly at every thrust .
His hand that was planted beside you , slid up to wrap around your neck , putting enough pressure on your throat to have your eyes roll in the back of your skull.
“Come for me” he whispered before ducking his head down to bite on the plush skin of your collarbone. The action had you screaming loudly, the waves of pleasure crashing you over you like a sea storm. It was violent, leaving you shaking for several seconds as he continued to drive himself deeper into you , not even stopping when he reached his own high . Sensitive shaft twitching uncontrollably as he painted your insides white .
“Take it all , darling” he whimpered in the crook of your neck , puncturing every words by a sharp bite of his canines.
You sobbed in overstimulation. Your head resting against his chest as you murmured soft pleads for him to stop.
“Shh” he shushed you while kissing away your tears with a gentleness that contrasted his hips below “just take it”
He licked your tears away before kissing you with an unusual tenderness while he continued to fuck you roughly.
You cried out as your second orgasm washed over you ,your whole body convulsing against his as your hand practically tore his uniform jacket with how good it hurts.
Caleb's body jerked against yours, his head dropping in the crook of your neck as he reached his peak for a second time , pace finally slowing down to let you breathe.
You stayed like this for several minutes, wrapped in each other's embrace as you desperately tried to catch your breath.
As the fluffy cloud of pleasure dissipated the ugly truth came back to slap you right back on your face .
You succumbed to the sweet temptation Caleb was once again. Even as you promised yourself you wouldn't get involved with him again , here you were half naked with him still buried deep inside of you.
You attempted to push him off you , the action making him raise his head from the crook of your neck to shoot you a confused look.
The audacity to appear confused. You scoffed internally.
“You should go” you heard yourself say , your voice sounding hoarse from screaming his name too loudly .
His brow knitted together, clearly struggling to understand your point .
“It'll be troublesome if someone find you here” you explained calmly , acting as if he wasnt ramming into you 5 minutes ago.
“I am aware” he replied with that same confused note in his tone, still not making any moves to get the fuck off you.
“Then get off” you glared at him causing him to sigh
“You're trying to run away again” he caressed your legs softly with a pensive look in his eyes.
“I am not trying to run away, you dirtied me with your seed and I just want yo go the bathroom so get the fuck off me” you scowled stil trying to push him away .
Your words earned a barely muffled laugh from him. His eyes gleaming with barely concealed amusement.
“I am sorry” he left a small kiss on your nose that made your heart melt “I thought you'd enjoy the mess”
“Well I don't, so get off” you let out in a small grumble
“You're always so bossy , Lieutenant” he chided softly before picking you up making you wrap your arm tightly around his neck .
“You should ease up a little” he added , carrying you towards your personal bathroom to clean you up.
“And you should know by now that I don't take advices from you” you bit back .
The only thing you should ease is probably a gun down his throat.
“Sure you don't” he said with a small smirk before pushing the bathroom door open with his feet to get you inside.
After cleaning you up in a remotely peaceful silence , Caleb left you alone in your office to muse on your thoughts.
Just when will this madness end?
Just when will you stop being so attached to him? The response was clear : never because no matter how much he hurt you? And how hard you tried to stay away from him. You'll always find your way back . Like a drug addict , you were addicted to him. Addicted to his poison . A poison that will probably end up killing you
The end (or no)
BAM .
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