#while also being frequently read as a trans guy.
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If I had a nickel for every time I saw a romantic interpretation of a pair of male characters where the smaller, weaker, younger, less composed of the two was portrayed as a transmasculine character. I.
#can we all just Think a moment about whether and why we are replicating transphobic caricatures#sometimes it does happen that a young small physically weak and/or emotionally open man in a work of fiction has a story that resonates#with themes of intellect dominating physical form or general societal alienation or illusions and facades or personal unreadability#what gets really annoying it the constant association of negative ‘feminine’ traits with transmasculinity.#can we not have the cool dude be trans instead if we had to choose. or both.#kelsey rambles#sgt jack jackrum we’re really in it now.#it also works the other way. eg the character of the Bachelor is of a brusque unibrowed man with an unlikely fighting spirit#he gets dumbed down to a light yagami esque effeminate misogynist and referred to by your casual fan as ‘bitchy’#while also being frequently read as a trans guy.#this is saying that the bachelor is a characrer with an almost stereotypical masculinity (the professor) who reads well as trans man#because of his Themes. but while half of people do interpret him as trans vis a vis snakeskins triumphing over conventional expectations etc#the other half just look at the high heels and call it a day.
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I think the most defining thing about kremy as a person is that he desperately wants to be a man with a mustache -- while being physically, biologically incapable of producing hair follicles lol. like no wonder he takes to drag so much, that's basically most of what he's already doing with his outward identity! and the physical aspect of that is smaller, I feel, than what he's got going on psychologically. he's someone who doesn't want to be -- can't be? -- who and what he is, and who can't be what he wants to be because what he wants to be doesn't really exist, so he lives his life somewhere on the border between them. the almiraj might be no mirage, but the perfectly clever and charming and utterly untouchable version of kremy that kremy would like to be -- instead of the vulnerable neurotic mess of longing and fear and striving for control he clearly actually is -- absolutely is, I'm afraid. it's just a shadow on the wall with nothing real to cast it.
(all of this also goes into the many Gender and trans readings of him too, of course! men will say they’re fighting demons and the demons are trying to live up to a very specific brand of toxic masculinity they've sort of invented for themselves lol)
the one deep down entrenched assumption we see kremy make again and again especially interpersonally is that if he's open with who he really is and what he feels or thinks at any given time, he would be revealed as fundamentally unacceptable and at best discarded and abandoned, at worst endangered. (it's literally spelled out with the cyclops in the witchlight carnival, but you see him go through this process all the time through the rest of the story too! being unable to lie or dissemble was a catastrophic event in this dude’s inner landscape. I’m sure that means nothing) and because he is also frequently kind of awful this assumption may not be entirely off base some of the time lol (deeply affectionate), but I think it comes from a much deeper place than that. kremy is ashamed of where he's from and who he's been -- that dirt poor wide-eyed kid from the swamp who saw all the fancy gentlemen in town and Wanted. wanted to be that, wanted to have that power, probably some confused sexuality want mixed up with it all as well for spice. wanted more than anything, perhaps, to BE something, because next to that he feels like nothing. which means abandoning the earnest kid who guilelessly loved unicorns and his meemaw and cooking without meaning to impress anyone and silly soft things in the swamp he came from while he went off to the big city and modeled himself after men like garou. (and his relationship with garou surely also had some effects on just how shifty he's become at intimacy too, aside from the building a facade of it all, that might be some secondary damage that was not his fault nor in his control at all)
even when he's acting seemingly shamelessly, he is fundamentally a shame-based psychology, is what I'm trying to get at. the only times he lets his thoughts and emotions out into the world unfiltered is when he's brought to a point of frustration where he throws up his hands and abandons manipulation or subtle machinations as an interpersonal tactic -- see: the several times he argues something with frost or gricko and then finally admits 'I literally don't actually care about this! you guys figure it out and deal with this if it matters so much to you I'm going to bed ffs' haha. his depression shines through when he’s too tired to hide it, especially in the later episodes. every open emotion is an admission he really didn't want to make and thinks is tactically disadvantageous for him. (and sometimes when he's being really for real he'll even admit to being worse than people gave him credit for, like when he admits he suspected mr. witch and mr. light were capable of doing something really really bad to torbek and handed him over anyway. kremy being that blunt and open is like. remarkable and also a sign that he's actually taking it seriously, for all that he's also revealing himself to be even more of an asshole than previously suspected lmao. that's not nothing, for kremy. BUT at the same time he is also the person who cried to see a unicorn broken and abused, and who saw something in gideon upon meeting him that no one else did or cared to at that time and offered him genuine companionship and support — as the story goes on he’s starting to admit to more things about himself, the bad and the good.)
all of which of course also is why he's having such a hard time being honest with gideon about how he feels (and the sheer immensity with which he feels it too, probably) -- that's incredibly vulnerable for a person who’s built himself up around the idea of never being vulnerable. ('i'm just a shadow, nothing you do can really touch or hurt me.') And yet if there’s peace and redemption to be found for kremy, if only within his own soul, between these versions of himself, I feel that discovering and accepting his own capacity for loving someone else so much that it transcends all selfishness or fear would be integral to it. (he loves gideon. So much it makes me a bit dizzy you guys)
#...I literally woke up and wrote all of this in one go before even making breakfast. what the fuck#(I have been thinking about it for a while so it was just a matter of getting it down on the page but still! breakfast is usually sacred)#kremy lecroux#once upon a witchlight#coalecroux#legends of avantris#I love kremy he's my awful babygirl#the mom friend who stepped down in high heels the man the myth the legend#i'm an understander and enjoyer of the multitudes he contains. especially since when he's mean it's often extremely funny#*distressed disbelieving andy voice* oh my god you guys are so fucking mEAN!!!! he was right and he should say it
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wait IS jhy confirmed trans? i was interpreting that way but it seemed like translation confusion when i read it. i'd be so happy if that was true ;o;
Short answer: JHY is definitely a woman, early translation confusion was largely due to the fact that Korean doesn't necessitate gendered pronouns as much as English, she is never specifically called transgender but her portrayal represents a lot of trans experiences and I choose to interpret her as transgender.
Long Answer:
Jang Hayoung as a character represents the webnovel catagory of 'transmigration,' wherein a character from 'the real world' wakes up in the body of a 'character' and must navigate their life. Jang Hayoung was a transcendent reborn into the body of Aileen Makerfield's 15 year old 'son' Aslan in the demon realm. To my understanding, Jang Hayoung's gender previous to her transmigration is unclear, it's possible that she was a cis woman in her first life. Hayoung (or Hayeong) is commonly from 夏榮 with the meaning 'glory of summer' and generally has a feminine connotation. Regardless, after her transmigration she has to face the dysphoria and challenges of 'spiritually' being a 23 year old woman in the body of a 15 year old 'boy,' and the interactions she has with other characters are easy to recognize trans experiences in to me.
Throughout 'episode 43' her gender is discussed a lot. YJH who has little concept of transmigration calls Jang Hayoung a weak 'guy' and a 'rude jerk,' to which Jang Hayoung replies 'actually I'm a bitch.' It's also shown around this time that through the scenarios, transformation of the body is possible to the point of changing gender representation, as Yoo Joonghyuk takes on the 'Punisher' persona while enduring a punishment for rescuing Kim Dokja. Afterwards, Jang Hayoung says something to the effect of 'no matter what your body is, if you are a girl you are a girl no matter what' and YJH vehemently agrees with her, leaving Kim Dokja very confused. My interpretation of this scene is that YJH gains experience of what Jang Hayoung feels being seen as 'the wrong gender' because of her body when he presents as the punisher because he still feels he is the same person as before, but I've seen other interpretations of Transfem-coded YJH that also make a lot of sense.
It's also good to note that in Korean gendered pronouns are not used as frequently, so Jang Hayoung confused many translators because her use of exclusively feminine pronouns is not confirmed until the first chapter told from her third person POV, after which most translators switched their pronoun choices for her.
For me ORV's interpretation of JHY's transmigration falls into a lot of the transgendery feelings that I have. One time a girl in a psych class asked my professor why there were so many genderqueer autistic people when one of the major symptoms of autism is struggling with changes and I had to get on my soapbox of like, to be honest I feel like I never really changed but suddenly everyone else around me did. Like it was never important to me whether I was a 'girl' or a 'boy' because basically those were like teams to be on in elementary school and it didn't matter. But then I was growing up and it was kind of like... There was something just so soul crushing to me about the idea of growing up to be a "woman" as opposed to growing up to be a "man," as arbitrary as those labels can be it just does mean something to me. Choosing to be a guy and let myself orient my experiences and social life around that concept just feels right and makes it easier to be myself without being misunderstood by others. So for me the idea that someone with kind of reverse feelings from me who has always been a woman having to endure the experience of being in the role of a 'prepubescent boy' is pretty representative of A Transgender Experience even if that language is not specifically used. It's also a lot more compassionate than representation seen in other works, or even earlier in ORV itself, and I think my favorite thing was Kim Dokja being told he was a dumbass for thinking a woman wasn't a woman just because she was in a 'boy's body,' lol.
#rest is under the cut because im kinda shy about talking about my own transness#personal#ask#anonymous#orv#jang hayeong#jang hayoung
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State of the Bimbo - New Year, Same Kiki
Hi Barbie!
A new year is approaching and, after the emotional roller coaster that was 2023, I’m deciding to dedicate 2024 to being the best version of myself because honestly… I deserve it.
With that in mind, there is something that I've been debating telling you all for a long time. I’ve hinted at it in asks and such for a while, I’ve talked openly about it with people in DMs, but I’ve never actually said it outright on my blog.
I am a trans woman. I have always been a trans woman. I am also a bimbo. This isn’t just a kink for me; it’s a big part of who I am and who I'm becoming more and more every day.
So why did I wait so long to say something? Time for a quick history lesson and some Kiki lore. When I started this blog like 10 years ago, there was a super popular bimbo creator named Summer (also known as @bimboisbetter) and there was a huge controversy because Summer came out as a catfish. She was a man pretending to be Summer. Looking back, part of me wonders if Summer wasn't also trans… but it really isn’t my place to speak on that. (Also, that being said… Summer, if you’re still out there somewhere and reading this, I hope you’re doing well) Anyway, people were super upset because Summer deceived them. I, despite early accusations of being a woman, claimed I was a guy because I was masc-presenting and not even sure if I was trans or not at this point. I also RPed frequently as a tgtf (transgender transformation) that would get bimbofied. And playing a girl just… made sense. In retrospect, it felt more authentic to who I actually would realize I am way more than the masc person I believed I was “supposed” to be. But all I knew for sure that I didn’t want to face the same criticism Summer did, even if our situations were super different. Flash-forward a few years, a couple hiatuses, and a whole lot of soul-searching later, I’m now very comfortable with my identity. I know who I am. I know I was always her, even when I was making awful jokes like this. I’ve always been KIki; it’s just in the last few years that I’ve truly let her emerge from her cocoon. And I can’t wait to keep growing and becoming the best bimbo barbie I can be!
xoxo,
Kiki 💖🏳️⚧️
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“Is porn addiction real? Less so than claimed, argues Lisa Hagen in a bombshell report for NPR. In this article, the journalist explores the ‘masturbation abstinence’ and anti-porn addiction movement in the US, finding a landscape filled with pseudoscience, reactionary rhetoric, and shame. “In one study,” Hagen notes, “among people who self-identify as ‘pornography addicts’, the average frequency of porn use was less than ten times a year”.”
…
“Meanwhile, sex acts outside the norm are often configured as things that only exist to hurt and degrade women or pollute their relationships, rather than as things women could possibly be interested in. Several of the women I’ve talked to have spoken about being into kink, and about how alienated they feel by discourse that kink is just a cover for violence against women, rather than something women themselves can desire and instigate.”
…
“The subtextual ‘threat’ behind ‘wrong’ porn gets very queer, very quickly. An interviewee for NPR describes a common set of anxieties on the forums he frequented: ‘‘The common themes were ‘porn is turning me gay’ or ‘porn is making me cross-dress’ or ‘porn is making me want to be dominated’ or ‘porn is making me like transgenders [sic]’.” It’s pretty clear that men are feeling drawn to the taboo thrills of getting topped, gender-play and gay exploration, whether as fantasy or as real possibility; men are also, I noticed, sometimes seeing straight porn and identifying with the woman. This opens up possibilities and anxieties that ‘porn addiction’ forums seek to close off. If you’re thinking about this stuff at all, they say, you have an addiction that is driving you to seek out ‘extreme’ material, and you need help. Reading this as a queer guy felt like hearing the Kill Bill sirens going off: it’s so clear that any erotic charge towards sex workers of any kind, gay men, trans women, or stigmatised forms of sex are seen as polluting ‘proper’ straight life.
If you read through anti-porn forums and programmes as someone who knows what conversion therapy looks like, you will find its tells in abundance. Heavy emphasis on shaming, while also promising that the programme will provide a way out of that shame; advice that new desires might not go away, but can be ignored and managed; unspoken assumptions that monogamous, cisgender, heterosexual, vanilla sex is the sexual ideal; heavy use of pseudoscience; intimations that the reader is being purposely corrupted by the porn industry or a wider, conspiratorial ‘agenda’. UK Rehab’s page on porn addiction advises that “pornography addiction can lead to changes in sexual tastes, desires and practices […] which can cause huge problems for addicts in relationships. The addict may begin to engage in different forms of sexual experience and expression, which may include risky sexual behaviour […] Even in less extreme cases, as mentioned above repeated exposure to hard-core pornography can lead to changed expectations of partners, which can make attaining a “normal” sex life increasingly difficult”. What is ‘normal’ here? What is ‘risky’? What are the ‘tastes’ in question?”
…
“Women, in particular, are taught that men’s excessive sexual desires are the root of cheating and disloyalty and sexual violence (rather than the misogyny that makes men disregard women’s boundaries, for instance), and that they therefore need to surveil and police their partners’ porn use. This is furthered by the assumption that any desire to use porn at all is a marker of unmanageable sexual vice and voraciousness, which you’ll particularly find in evangelical/religious circles.”
The fact that people will argue in court that this problem that, again, doesn’t exist, is responsible for CSA and other sexual violence and not the structure of society and families encouraging and enabling such…
…
“Most people who think they’re addicted to porn aren’t. What they’re addicted to is policing their own genders and sexualities, hoping that if they just do so a little more successfully, all their personal and relational problems will fall away.”
This seems relevant to the constant discussion about the subject here, especially given the politics of the people who think porn addiction/porn brain/etc is real
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I read your newsletter about "transmisandry" today. I'm a trans man and I generally agree with what you said. However, I was wondering how you would classify a particular experience of mine and other trans men I know irl or have seen online.
In short, I find that in some queer spaces, masculine and/or "binary" (meaning, not non-binary) trans men are treated as outsiders and enemies. I imagine some straight-passing queer cis men experience similar.
This prejudice against masculinity has nothing to do with us being trans, and is in no way oppressive, but it seems to me that some people have a hatred/disgust/discomfort/etc. with masculine men, especially if we are proud of our manhood. I sometimes feel excluded in queer or progressive spaces, and like I have to change myself to fit into others' idea of "acceptable" manhood.
I think this tends to emotionally affect trans men in particular because being a man is generally hard-won and joyful for us. Have you experienced prejudice in queer spaces, especially trans spaces, for being transmasculine? And while I don't believe there exists systemic misandry, is this not a form of misandry, just interpersonal?
Thanks, I really appreciate your work.
Hi there, thank you for great question. What you are describing is certainly a very real and troubling dynamic within both queer and feminist spaces, and it's put me off for a very long time. I have sometimes referred to this as "playful 'misandry' feminism", always with "misandry" in quotes because, as we've already established, it's not a real locus of systemic oppression. I have also sometimes in the past likened it to "Men's Tears Coffee Mug" feminism in its performative, self-congratulatory, typically white feminist stance.*
*in the Koa Beck sense of the term. Someone who is not white can be a white feminist.
I was always put off by performative man-hating jokes and the exclusion of men within feminist spaces because, well, I was one, and because it nearly always played out in transmisogynistic ways that were transparent to me, and because I was a major ride-or-die for men who were victims of sexual violence yet were frequently excluded from survivors' spaces (again, because I was one, even before I realized that I was).
There are a lot of troubling effects that happen when feminist women make a big performance out of finding all men to be disgusting and evil and frequently express disinterest in men's feelings or suffering (which used to be way more common in my estimation, around the early 2010's or so it seemed to peak). I was driven away from feminist spaces as a young closeted trans man because I could see such spaces were not for me or for any of the other men that I cared about and needed support. On the inverse side of things, I have spoken to many trans men who said that "playful "misandry"" feminism actively made it harder for them to realize that they were guys. Men were seen as the enemy and inherently evil and destructive and so they felt absolutely disgusting about the possibility of being a man, or feared transitioning would get them seen as a betrayer of the feminist movement.
As you rightly note, it is not just trans guys who get excluded by such dynamics. Cis men who are genuinely avowed feminists can be driven away by such forces, which is especially upsetting in the case of sexual assault survivors and queer men. Trans women and TMA enbies are excluded from feminist and women's spaces because they supposedly "look like" men to these types, and their own feelings of superficial safety rank above the actual data on who is the most at risk structurally (which is trans women). Butches are regarded in some spaces as too aggressive or unacceptably masculine because of it. And people's analysis of gender oppression just overall sucks when they buy into "playful misandry" style feminism because they go around saying shit like "femme people are oppressed by masc folks." what the hell does that mean. Does a cis, gender conforming feminine woman have less structural power than a butch lesbian? I don't think so.
It seems to me that the big problem here is that "playful misandry" feminism is rooted in a deep deep misunderstanding of the structural nature of oppression. Sexism isn't caused by patriarchy and capitalism, it's caused by "men" and so hating men and excluding them is what will fix things. Men as individuals are responsible for sexism and so women should be as detached from them and unsupportive of them as possible. This logic leads to a TERFy place really quickly, and yes, it also really really damages trans men.
My opinion is that it's best to critique this problem as the political failure that it is: a misunderstanding of sexism as individualistic rather than systemic. That's the core issue from which all the problems flow -- from rampant transmisogyny to the exclusion of cis male sexual assault survivors to the feelings of alienation of trans men. Yes sometimes naming the performative nature of "man hating" jokes and the like is helpful because people recognize instantly what that dynamic is when they hear it. But the "misandry" itself is not the core problem -- it's the shitty gender politics and white feminism.
Does that make sense? To be clear, I think it's something trans men get to talk about. I talk about it from my positionality quite a lot really. I don't think "misandry" is ultimately the helpful or clarifying way to name it, but I will sometimes throw around that term with a TON of qualifiers if I'm discussing the specific interpersonal dynamic of women saying that men are evil rapists innately or whatever. But really discussing the broader gender politics failure that leads to those little shitty comments and looks is almost always more helpful. If trans guys and cis guys are feeling excluded from a space due to these dynamics it's almost always the case that trans women, TMA enbies, butch women, and lots of women of color are too.
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Everyone, I have done it.
So, the post about Yugo and queerness in Wakfu is a 3 parter due to my use and abuse of pictures. You'll be able to enjoy part 2 here, and dw I'll add one at the bottom too
First, I would like to preface this by saying that, while I do believe they didn’t create or write Yugo with the idea making him queer in mind, I do not think the creators made things unintentionally either. What I think they actually wanted to do with Yugo, was to have a character that felt as gender neutral as possible, in order to make him relatable to the show's originally young audience, without alienating girls or boys. A character not leaning too much one way or the other.
But as such Yugo is a character that can be read within a queer lens without that much of an effort. I know a lot of people on this site hc him as on the aro and/or ace spectrum, some degree of nonbinary and in my specific case as genderfluid bi/pan, and I'm even considering possibly intersex.
Wakfu also happens to be the kind of show that, whether intentionally or not, just finds itself to have a ton and a half of queerness in it: from simple implications to actually out queer characters, the world depicted in the show is a diverse one, in that sense and more.
That’s why I genuinely think that it's not just random readings that come from fandom's typical queering goggles, I think there are elements in the show that do help these readings, precise elements as well as elements that need a little more digging.
So here's what this post aims to do: to find those elements and compile them in as clear a way as possible. Please do take into account that I am very easily prone to reaching so if you don't see it, that's totally fine, and I may end up structuring things in very chaotic ways, but I am doing my best.
I decided to separate my writing between the gender elements and the sexuality elements, with a listing format. One element, one dash. Since I am french and don’t know much about the english translation, I’ll be illustrating everything using screenshots as reminders, and will be adding some small notes and quotes translated by myself when needed. Well then, let's get started!
The gender category, or as I'd like to call it "this could have been an email- but make it about a trans character":
Yugo's name: first, this one is 100% due to a fic I read that made me reflect on a very interesting fact: in s1ep1, when Alibert finds Grougal's message, Yugo's name is never mentioned.
During that scene, he’s only called “this child” and “that small one”
What that means, given that Yugo's name has been "Yugo" since previous lives, is that either Alibert somehow picked the right name on first try, or, more logically, that he didn't. That Yugo got called another name for some years, until he got old enough to correct them.
And you would think the argument stops there, but in s2ep12, a character gets openly deadnamed and mocked for it by literally everyone, saying "his real name is…". There is one exception to this,
Yugo, who never mocks him and says "It’s not because your parents named you… ", which is a very interesting nuance in phrasing. It implies that, while to others the name their parents chose is a "real" name, an immovable fact of life, to Yugo it is a choice made by others for them, that can be wrong, that can be changed.
Yugo's relationship with femininity (and masculinity): Have you ever noticed that the Brotherhood of the Tofu very frequently separate themselves with gendered terms? You’ll often hear Tristepin and Ruel call Amalia and Eva “the girls” and Eva and Amalia call them plus Yugo “the boys”. Prior to the OVAs Yugo only does so in one episode, s2ep21, the one episode where he's magically seduced into being aggressive towards "the girls".
“You are so strong and smart, right guys?”
“If you aren’t happy you can go with the girls!”
Prior to this, Yugo never really plays into gender roles, and after it will be mainly due to his aging process, which we will discuss.
Yugo seems to treat socially gendered activities as if they weren’t, I believe it is also noticeable with his relationship to heroism, though that one can only be inferred in contrast to Tristepin's former very strict hero/princess binary viewpoint.
(Here I would have put an exception about the OVA and him admitting he always wanted to save a princess, but given that in the most recent manga the term is used as a pet name for him I guess I’ll let that one slide)
During s1ep4, Yugo crossdresses and not only is he comfortable with that fact, not only is he the one who came up with the idea (although Amalia gave him an unconscious push), he is thriving in it.
Look at the joy on his face upon putting a bow on.
I feel the need to remind everyone Yugo is 12 during s1, an age at which young boys are definitely aware of a gender divide and typically reject girly stuff like the pest.
Back to the Boufbowl episode once more, in s1ep10, you may have noticed Ruel calling being a cheerleader “being the girls”, and while Yugo may be on the bench as a substitute, he does participate in cheerleading right in the next episode.
Two three very motivated children and their unconvinced chaperone.
Actually he is the only character in the Brotherhood of the Tofu to be a cheerleader during both Boufbowl arcs.
His outfits are also not strongly gendered, especially compared to Tristepin's chest-out s2 design or Eva and Amalia's early short skirts, his most gendered character design might be his adult-form one, and even then, when compared to Nora's, you’ll notice Yugo is only ever wearing the same thing as her with added details (royal details?) and his own color palette. My take is he’s actually meant to look like the Eliatrope goddess, with his cape reproducing her hair.
S4 teaser Yugo because we don’t have a clean pic of his s4 design, and I did my best for Nora.
Yugo's aging process as a metaphor for transness: as we all know, from the OVAs until the last quarter of s4, Yugo is a young adult trapped within a child's body. He gets mocked and infantilized on the regular, his status as king belittled. The only thing that he maintains some form of respect for is his status as a hero. And you can tell it is weighing him down. For one, this body is an obstacle to his relationship with Amalia, not just due to the eyes of others,
"I grow slowly whereas she, she became a queen, a woman...", with the implication "and I'm not a man” or “I don't pass as one"
but also due to his own degrading self-perception.
“Let’s see who’s small!”
(notice how easily he gets tickled by a simple comment on his size, how the mere notion of his body being revealed becomes reason enough for violence in s3ep7).
Yugo gets angry and violent, a lot, and more than is typically expected of him.
“I tried thinking like Yugo, I’m sure he would have preferred this to the hit-you-in-the-face method.”
“Dear little brother, I don’t know what happened to you these last few years, but I don’t recognize you anymore!”
A result of trauma, sure, but if you're like me you may have noticed how turning into an adult made him feel very… relaxed, suddenly. In a way that can be compared to the disappearance of symptoms of body dysphoria with people who go through a process of gender-affirming transition.
As an aside, his s3 design really makes him look like he's wearing a binder, in addition to the turtleneck that would hide the absence of an Adam's apple, the look is very transmasc.
That one particular art of him is what really marked me, because of the slight shade under the chest. Doesn’t mean it is a binder, just means it could look like one.
Yugo's Eliatrope hat as a metaphor: There may not seem like there is much to say, but the fact is that this hat was very mysterious for a very long time. If you were part of the fandom before the s2 finale you may have been theorizing on a forum about what was going on behind that hat (I was on the "a second pair of ears but these are shaped like cat ears" team, but still slightly unconvinced), and you knew that there wasn't anyone more curious about this than Nox.
“We may finally get to find out what you hide under your hat.
-Even my friends never forced me to tell them!”
was a very iconic line, one that definitely could remind people of the infamous "what's in your pants" question.
Well the Brotherhood was curious as well, but mostly respectful and patient with their friend.
It was clear that there was discomfort with that part of him that he refused to reveal, so much so that he probably never washed with any of his friends. When they would hang around for days, when the girls wouldn't care between each other (and neither would Eva and Pinpin between each other, wink wink), when they would all sleep together, Yugo probably would still never take it off in front of them.
Overall my point is just that inthe rare times the hat gets discussed, it just doesn't sound cis.
the Eliotropes: they're coming back in the sexuality section, dw.
But, as Yugo himself says, they are "versions" of himself. The interesting question now is "in which way?" Since they are not "past versions" of him, and since they seem to "inherit" some of his personality/physical traits, I do believe them to be an expression of his own fragmented sense of self. Some of them may be men, as a reflection of his own perception of himself as one, but then some may be women for that same reason, and well some are women, some even are canonically enby.
Character on the far left is enby and character on the far right is a woman. Obviously Echo is not an Eliotrope.
One could even go as far as considering these traits can physically express themselves only because Yugo's anatomy reflects them, and in that case we can go into not just a gender reading, but into an intersex one. Pushing further into it, Yugo, being their creator, effectively gave birth to them, and as such they call him father, but the act of giving birth itself is typically associated with the feminine, sowe could argue that Yugo’s position is both one of father and of mother.
Of course they also have physical and mental aspects that are separate from Yugo, like none of the ones we met are the same sandy blonde as Yugo is for example, but the ambiguity of the existence of the Eliotropes is and will always be a matter of "where does Yugo end and where do they begin?".
A little question mark for the road: In OVA2, as a joke, Rubilax “reveals” that Tristepin was actually a woman all along. This is a sample of everyone’s reaction:
1st, Amalia is so bi it’s insane, but that’s not my point here. Yugo’s reaction being of absolute shock, even more so than Tristepin himself always had me wondering what was going on in his head. Through a queer lens it remains just as hard to read through, so my personal take is that Yugo is amazed at how male-“passing” Pinpin is, so much so he may think “You mean to tell me I knew that guy for years and never realized he was trans too?!” I don’t know, I’d love to get some feedback on that one.
That first section was 2 pages-long without the pictures, so let’s take a tiny break and enjoy some Yugo cuteness as a breather.
Just the cutest. He doesn’t even need to try.
part 2
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Five headcannons you have about Phone Guy ?
[EDIT: all of this was written months before the week before came out. some of my hcs have been adjusted slightly since then although most of this still applies]
yayyyyy thank you so much for the ask this is the first time i've been asked about him !!! this ended up a bit long because i wanted to fit in all my important phone guy lore because i've never gotten the opportunity to talk about him
i apologize if this is a bit all over the place and hard to read i'm not good at putting my thoughts into words
also i might reblog with more if i think of anything big i missed
he drinks way too much coffee. he needs to stay awake and alert all the time so he can continue to be productive despite his inconsistent sleep schedule (he gets nightmares which get more and more frequent over time) (and he is also being overworked which is not a good combo) (he doesn't remember the last time he's had a day off) so he uses the caffeine as a way to make up for that. plus he also just genuinely likes how coffee tastes. he also used to smoke but he stopped when his ex wife (marilyn) was pregnant with fritz, so he at least got over that one (if i didn't mention it yet he is fritz's dad btw). caffeine is the only addiction that he still actively struggles with by the time he dies.
he has a confusing relationship with his gender. i think in the normal fnaf timeline he unfortunately dies an egg and never gets the chance to think about it fully but in any au where he lives past that and learns that being trans is a thing he would proceed to have a gender crisis. (fun fact in the au i made specifically for selfshipping daydream lore he is working that out in real time) (i am supporting him every step of the way :) ) he is questioning and he has no idea how he identifies at the moment but that guy is not a man. he does still have a trans pin in the normal fnaf timeline but he doesn't actually know what it means. he found it while cleaning the ballpit one day and decided to keep it because it was kinda neat. he IS trans but he doesn't know it yet. i generally still refer to him with he/him since those are the only pronouns he ever used but depending on the au i think eventually he might experiment with other pronouns in the future. change is scary though so it would definitely take him awhile to get to that point. especially since he's been repressing his emotions for so long. (EDIT: she is now using he/she pronouns :3)
i've touched on this one before but he was working the day his son was murdered. he brought fritz to work with him thinking he could multitask but phone got caught up with work and wasn't paying enough attention to notice fritz getting lured to the back room. he didn't notice his son was missing until it was too late. he absolutely blames himself for it and it eats him up inside. he goes through a messy divorce shortly after since marilyn blames him too. poor phone guy has no one left except his bosses. at least they always cared about him right? they saw his potential when no one else did and he was their best employee. except no they didn't. william was actively manipulating him to do his bidding and henry just didn't care about him at all. poor phone guy. but he still puts on a happy face and pretends everything is fine until he can't anymore. he also blames himself for the other missing children because he was too far in denial and desperately wanted to believe that it wasn't what it looked like so he didn't do anything to stop it when other kids started disappearing. he knew what was happening he just couldn't bring himself to accept it. and then it was too late. he hates himself for that.
he's helped william hide bodies. not the missing children obviously, but whenever other employees happen to know a little too much and they turn up dead in the morning, someone's gotta clean it up. he's had to sweep so much under the rug. it's horrible but phone guy can't say anything or else it will all get pinned on him. phone guy getting framed for murder wouldn't help the situation much either. maybe it was the cowards way out to give in to the blackmail but he was put in a horrible situation and made the choice he had to to get out of it. he helped dispose bodies of his coworkers. it doesn't help that he trusted william and looked up to him for so long. he was one of the only people to ever say he was proud of him. and look where he ended up.
i can't decide on another singular hc to write an entire paragraph on so here's a bunch of small ones instead:
he dabbled in theatre in highschool. he wasn't a dedicated theatre kid or anything and definitely didn't continue after graduating but he did good
he has a beautiful singing voice. he'll get embarrassed if you overhear him though
he witnessed both bites, and sees 87 as his own fault since jeremy was following the instructions phone gave him
he's a breakfast enjoyer :)
he was born in 1957 and died at the age of 36 . fritz was conceived when he was 21
similar to his gender, his sexuality is also a mystery. he's probably ace but as for romantic orientation who knows
he likes to read. it's one of the only hobbies he has time for
he likes sci-fi and is a fan of star trek
he idly hums while he works
when he was a kid his parents had very high expectations for him and expected him to do something big with his life. they weren't bad parents but they weren't the best either. they were very strict with him especially when it came to school. (gifted kid burnout weeeoo)
he has a little sister (phone dude's mom) however he doesn't really have any contact with her or anyone else in his family at the time of fnaf as they moved away from utah and he did not follow them.
i love all the phone biology hcs mentioned in @ask-the-phone (sorry if you didn't want to be tagged lmk i can remove it) so those apply to my phone guy as well. (he molts periodically, his mouth is on the receiver, esophagus cord, ect.)
gives the best hugs
touch starved and very easily flattered
//⚠️cw attempted suicide for the next couple //
this is a dark one but he went into fnaf one knowing full well he was going die, and to an extent hoping for it. this is when he was at his absolute lowest. he was never going to get through that week. i think if for whatever reason the animatronics didn't kill him he would've finished the job himself. he's scared of death but he couldn't imagine a future for himself and didn't think he even deserved one. fnaf 1 was an act of suicide. despite this he still tries to leave helpful reassuring messages for mike to help him survive the week, even up until his last moments.
he tried to take his own life after the bite of 87. maybe also after the divorce too. it didn't work and he just had to go back to work afterward and pretend he was okay. he was not.
[ok back to the other hcs]
fritz always used to put stickers on phone's face. he continues to wear the stickers to remember him
while his head is phone shaped it's entirely biological. it's essentially like a bug exoskeleton. he was born like that and it's not questioned because that's a completely normal way for people to look. sometimes people are just phones
his head is also functional as a phone though. don't ask me how
he purrs when he's comfy.
in the movie universe he is alive and well and living a life outside of freddy's. he worked there briefly and recorded some tapes and then left before it all went wrong. i guess in this au his bosses never really saw him as anything special this time. his son still dies and he probably still gets divorced but phone is able to move on and heal and live his own life. good for him.
i think if phone guy didn't work at freddy's he would've made a good teacher
he is so full of autism
very much a perfectionist unfortunately
not easily angered, but he can get frustrated at times. he bottles it up though so he seems fine until he finally snaps
and that's the list i came up with so far :) i might add more if i think of anything important i forgot but thank you so much for giving me an opportunity to finally talk about my phone guy !!! :)
edit:
-in honor of the news, his middle name is ralph, making his full legal name phone ralph guy (because that is just so funny to me)
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I watched Lena Dunham's Sharp Stick (2022) with a babe last month. Which I absolutely loved!!!
It's never explicitly acknowledged, but the main character is clearly supposed to be (despite the producers claiming otherwise) in some way neurodivergent. Or something. She's meek and impossibly sexually naive (to the point where me and the girl I watched it with had initially assumed the character was intended to be a child). Apparently they had approached an autism sexuality advocate to work as a consultant for the film before backpeddling.
Trans girls tend to be autistic.
The main character also had a hysterectomy (as did Lena Dunham).
Trans girls tend to be infertile.
She's shown taking estrogen.
Trans girls tend to take estrogen.
She becomes obsessed with porn and begins having one night stands with random men from the internet in hopes of finding validation by proving her sexual desirability.
Trans girls tend to do that shit.
It ends with her realizing and leaning into her impregnation fetish (while getting fucked by the one black guy she knows who had just brought over some 40s and called them homies and also while her black step sister's hands unexpectedly drift in from off screen to hold her because even when she managed to push it off to the last second Lena Dunham is incapable of being chill and normal about race).
Trans girls can't go ten seconds without making the same joke about how if you don't think you can get a trans girl pregnant then you just aren't trying hard enough (and the frequent fetishization of black men in trans and especially neighboring sissy communities can't really be denied).
Also the bartender is played by Tommy Dorfman (a trans woman) with it being her first time playing a character with a girl name.
But I'm not trying to suggest it's intentionally a movie about the tgirl excperience. That would be silly. Really the takeaway should be that (no matter how varied women's lives may be) we (trans women and cis women etc) can still always find common ground and shared excperiences. We're all in this together.
But anyways I was looking at Lena Dunham's Instagram yesterday (I've been off and on again rewatching Girls, so she's stayed on my mind).
One post features the music video she directed starring famed trans girl Hari Nef.
Another post shows that she recently read trans boy Elliot Paige's memoir Paige Boy.
Another post shows a conversation she had with Jon Bernthal (on his podcast) where she explains the word cis to him and talks about having also explained it to her husband (this is the only clip from her appearance on the podcast that she chose to post).
BTW did you know that she was an executive producer for the 2021 show Genera+ion (which I recall featuring a trans boy actor playing a cis boy character who gets a girl pregnant).
Fascinating!
Meanwhile. Ten years earlier. In 2013 (a year into my transition and a year before Time declared that we've reached the trans tipping point) an episode of Girls features a doorman telling one of the titular Girls that "a tranny walked in last time and he was just walking around the floors, but it was nothing." (lmao)
UPDATE: s05e02 features a "did you just assume my pronouns" bit. (in a way that felt reactionary and gross because the theyfab saying it was an absurd hipster barista that the audience isn't intended to sympathize with)
UPDATE UPDATE: s06e02 features the leader of a group for women entrepreneurs saying "For those of you asking on our Facebook if the group is open to trans women: The answer is: We don't know. Okay?" (which I thought was fun)
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: s06e03 (the literal next episode) "I even went to a couple of hookers and one of them had a dick."
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with xena being from the 90s is there anything specificically dubious or of the time that people should know of ahead of time before going in? ie the similar vein to warning people of tng test of honor and other drek in 90s trek?
hope you dont mind the ask, youre just one of the few people I see around still chatting about xena
some of it is YMMV. the entire show plays fast and loose with all kinds of mythology and magic from not just Greece/Rome but as far away as brittania, norway, china and egypt. (all the gods of each culture seem to exist simultaneously and occasionally interact/chat with each other.) But generally plotlines are one of the following:
Xena's evil past has consequences
Warlord/God acting up and needs to be defeated
A god is being mischievous and needs to be outwitted (aphrodite, cupid, some others are common here)
something silly/over the top/campy
Gabrielle is trying to figure out her life's direction
Xena's Personal Beef with Rome and Caesar in Particular
sometimes multiple or all of the above (see Fish Femmes and Gems)
Up to season 5 on my current rewatch, I'd say The Way is still probably the most culturally insensitive (they actually had to record a PSA on hinduism over it). The two leading up to that didn't seem to get any backlash that I could tell when reading about it. (its a three part story that's super important to the plotline and character development of the show and hammers home the soulmate angle, especially the second one). But I'm no gonna speak for that culture or anything, just what I read on the wiki. But the third part I know enough to feel uncomfortable with it). Ripped from the wiki:
The episode was pulled from syndication after protests from Hindu groups. It was finally allowed to be reshown with the addition of a public service announcement at the very end by Lucy, Renée, as well as a spokesman for the Hindu community explaining that the producers took liberties with the Hindu religion.
In general, jokes and silliness overall tend to land well, especially if you enjoy camp.
While it can be clumsy in some respects overall it handles gender and race pretty well, there's a variety of women of various roles. They had someone in drag at a fashion show episode who (who late IRL came out as trans) that was handled really well. The Amazons are very much sexy but also deep and spiritual.
Casting generally appears to be race blind with regard to heroic roles, evil roles and the more complicated grey area 'seeking redemption' roles and mostly seems to try to cast appropriately on a cultural basis. Like warlord casting seemed to be like 'are you a big guy? you're hired!'
Nothing ever seemed to approach test of honor's level of bad IMO, except maybe The Way.
(I'd argue there's even some meta commentary with regard to centaurs and centaur culture and how its treated)
Its got some of your standard 'guy likes girl, does stupid shit for girl' type stuff but he gets character growth and ultimately he's family. He's the little brother, 'only we can bully him but god help you if you bully him' type of dynamic. Someone hurts our proto-himbo joxer and xena and gabrielle go for the throat. Then ten minutes later are roasting him.
The only episode I really skip is the gross one involving lice and a skin rash(but at least they let the lady heroes be gross, quite frequently in fact). Maybe also skipping the married ...with children parody episode too. The Way could maybe get by with a summary but I wanted to watch it again specifically to see where it fell on the character part. Pretty important to jumpstarting Gabrielle's peace arc.
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I LOVE your headcanons and can’t wait to read more of them!
Meet the Robinsons headcanons P2 - Fritz and his Kids.
[Possible trigger warning for self deprecating behavior/words. Also, unrelated but I LOVE feedback/responses! If you have anything to add or comment on a reblog, pls do!!!!]
Fritz suffers from generalized anxiety, separation anxiety, and dyslexia.
He’s never broken a bone, and Gaston occasionally tries to push him into dangerous situation on purpose to probe him to break one.
⬆️ This is out of love. The Framaguccis have the very solid belief injury builds character.
Fritz is HUGE on grooming. He isn’t a clean freak, but he is the kind of guy to own seven shampoos and frequently buy everyone else bathing stuff.
Fritz is the only person in the house in denial about that doll being real. The doll is, by the way, not real.
‘Petunia’ was carved by Fritz, and while doing so he cut off multiple of his fingers, and the stitches are very visible on his puppeting hand if he ever takes the doll off.
Fritz is ambidextrous, as are BOTH his children.
Tallulah and Laszlo are both trans, MTF and FTM respectively.
Tallulah stays up until 4am watching conspiracy theory videos and then randomly blurts stuff about cryptids at breakfast.
She claims she hates any energy drink because caffeine is a blight on the world, but consumes about 7 cups of coffee an hour.
The other Robinsons literally hide the pot past noon, and it’s saying a LOT if a Robinson cuts you off something.
Tallulah is the only person from her side of the family who isn’t neurodivergent at all.
She makes all the Halloween costumes in August and then waits impatiently for Halloween (and Summerween, because this family celebrates that 100%).
She loves short haired dogs and cats. HATES anything that sheds, unfortunately including the family dog.
Laszlo is autistic, I have covered this before.
He also suffers from sensory based OCD, which is only shared with Wilbur in the rest of the family.
Laszlo has nightmares but always forgets what they’re about.
Hes EXTREMELY intelligent, but has the attention span of a toddler and prefers painting over inventing.
He can’t cook. There is a sticky note on all the appliances he isn’t allowed to use, which include but are not limited to: The oven, the stove, the toaster, the coffee maker, the toaster over, the air fryer, the dishwasher, and the second sink.
Laszlo cannot draw people for shit without the gun, but he is WEIRDLY good an animals. He probably had a fursona growing up.
Laszlo had blue hair growing up and looked a little homeless with how ratty he dressed. He was also into anime. (Have any of you seen NPMD? Teenage Laszlo is essentially just Richard Lipshitz from that musical.)
Laszlo, unlike his sister LOVES large, fluffy dogs - the bigger the better.
Laszlo uses his goggles as a comfort object and will panic without them.
‘Petunia’ has pads installed in her hands to soften blows on Fritz. Art added this out of genuine concern Fritz was using the doll for self deprecating purposes.
‘Petunia’ has a time out box, curtesy of everyone else.
Essentially everybody but Laszlo looks for any excuse to get that doll away from Fritz. Bud is the nicest about it, not at all trying to stop Fritz from having her, but not acknowledging ‘Petunia’ when possible.
Laszlo sometimes takes the doll when Fritz is asleep and stares at it in the middle of the night.
He doesn’t remember his mom.
#Fritz robinson#Uncle Laszlo#laszlo robinson#tallulah robinson#Aunt tallulah#petunia robinson#MENTIONED —>#Bud robinson#art framagucci#wilbur robinson#tw self destructive behavior#meet the robinsons
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Just One of the Guys? Transgender Men and the Persistence of Gender Inequality by Kristen Schilt
goodreads
The fact that men and women continue to receive unequal treatment at work is a point of contention among politicians, the media, and scholars. Common explanations for this disparity range from biological differences between the sexes to the conscious and unconscious biases that guide hiring and promotion decisions. Just One of the Guys? sheds new light on this phenomenon by analyzing the unique experiences of transgender men—people designated female at birth whose gender identity is male—on the job. Kristen Schilt draws on in-depth interviews and observational data to show that while individual transmen have varied experiences, overall their stories are a testament to systemic gender inequality. The reactions of coworkers and employers to transmen, Schilt demonstrates, reveal the ways assumptions about innate differences between men and women serve as justification for discrimination. She finds that some transmen gain acceptance—and even privileges—by becoming “just one of the guys,” that some are coerced into working as women or marginalized for being openly transgender, and that other forms of appearance-based discrimination also influence their opportunities. Showcasing the voices of a frequently overlooked group, Just One of the Guys? lays bare the social processes that foster forms of inequality that affect us all.
Mod opinion: I haven't heard of this book before, but it sounds quite interesting!
#just one of the guys?#just one of the guys? transgender men and the persistence of gender inequality#kristen schilt#polls#trans books#trans lit#trans literature#lgbt books#lgbt lit#lgbt literature#nonfiction#gender studies#trans studies#queer studies#sociology
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felix h. fraldarius
FELIX!
First impression:
Swordguy!
I’ve been informed by multiple independent sources that I am going to like him and I don’t get a choice, so like, let's see how that turns out
Asshole (affectionate?) (maybe?)
Impression now:
OUGH he’s a mess and I love him a lot. His personality reminds me of my horse and I think he’d hate to hear that but I mean it as a compliment (specifically that he’s a loyal, intelligent, determined and extremely trustworthy friend who is no less a rude and stubborn little bastard man for it). I frequently wish I could hug him even though I do not think he would let me, realistically. Half the time when I start talking about him I make myself sad but that’s just how it is with bitches from Faerghus :)
Favorite moment:
I think it’s funny that almost every time he actually tries to be nice (or at least not openly rude) to someone for the first time, the person he’s talking to is like “what do you mean. you bastard. you evil little man. what ulterior motives do you have.” Annette, Bernie, Lysithea, it keeps happening.
Alternatively, the time in my og run when I had him solo the Fraldarius soldiers in that one training mission while everyone else just followed him around cheering him on the whole time. I like to think he knew a lot of those guys and it was very satisfying to beat some of them.
Idea for a story:
Same one I mentioned in the ask about Dimitri. dies
Unpopular opinion:
I could pick him up I bet. idk I don't know what counts as unpopular
Favorite relationship:
Ok I feel obvious saying Sylvain but they really are very extremely. I’ve gotten two of their endings so far. One of them made me die (positive) and the other made me die (dead). I’m also, maybe predictably, compelled by whatever the hell his situation is with Dimitri (side note, in my first run I kept putting them on stable duty as the Get Along Or Else activity and they kept getting perfect results and he complained every time, which. yeah). I love his Sword Bros friendship with Byleth. And I did not expect it, but his A support with Dedue was one of my favorites in the route… him being all “you shouldn’t risk your life because strategically etc etc etc” and Dedue like “love you too” lmao get read idiot
Favorite headcanon:
I sometimes forget he isn’t canonically a trans man. Relatedly, I think that Glenn helped him pick his name not long before he died—Felix chose it himself, of course, that was important to him, but Glenn gave him suggestions and talked through it with him while he was working on it. I also think Rodrigue wants to accept him as his son, but Felix has a pretty clear mental image of the kind of man he thinks his father would respect and he Does Not Want To Be That. And sometimes when he looks in the mirror he looks more like Glenn than he did the last time. And it’s a mess. :)
it's him .
#fire emblem#felix hugo fraldarius#Prickly Rude Bitch (justifiable) is one of my favorite character types tbh#got uh. a little heavy with the trans headcanons lmaooooo sorry :))))))) it b like that sometimes I guess#ask meme#talking
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I've spent an upsetting amount of time thinking about why Rain sucks so bad. I read Ward as it updated, as I had a lot of interactions with the fandom, as I discussed it daily with other people who, like me, were way too intense about an online web serial. But the one conclusion I agreed with most of them about was that Rain sucks. Like, in a story about a group of people who all need redemption, he's the only one in the group who doesn't seem to have any of that past person in him. The story tells us he does, with exchanges like
“Blacks, Hispanics, Asians, Natives, Middle Easterners, then gay, trans,” Tristan rattled off. “Deeper than that,” Rain said. “I had to start with re-figuring women and how I thought about them. I’m still pretty shitty, as much as I’m trying, because I hear you rattle that off and my first thought is ‘some of these aren’t like the others’ and I have to stop myself.” “You’ve said a few things,” Chris said. “Probably.”
But we never actually see him like that. We never see Rain go "trans women aren't women" or quote Ace Ventura or something like that. He is a fairly milquetoast character who doesn't have much going for him in the way of character traits, which is a little odd in a group like Breakthrough where every single member is a flavor of fuckhead.
It is Very Bad Literary Analysis to blame something on the author, but I do have a theory about how this happened. Wildbow has said he considered Rain for protagonist of Ward, and parts of that still come through in the text - the first big arc relates to him, a lot of the secret mechanics that the story unveils are first hinted at through him (he's far from the only member of Breakthrough with power fuckiness, but we never see Chris, T&B, or Sveta deal with entities in the very direct way he does) - but he is also fairly flat as a character, and doesn't have *that* much to do. I suspect Wildbow, when planning Ward, was dealing mostly with the contingent of fans he spoke to: A few die-hard nerds on Cauldron in the few channels he frequented at the time, people on r/parahumans, his IRC friends... While he was aware of the worst parts of the fandom he didn't have to deal with them directly. Rain, as planned, was not a problem in his eyes. Actually writing Ward forced the worst parts of the fandom (yes, worse than Amy stans) to his attention, as many of them were interacting with the parts of the fandom he interfaced with. I think Wildbow realized that if he had a main character, one who is vital to the narrative, say these bigoted things, he would encourage the worst parts of his fandom, and I believe Wildbow is someone who doesn't want to encourage the bigots. I'm highly critical of him, but he is someone who dislikes bigotry to an extent that he'd try to fix it. I think some Ward choices come from that, and I think Rain being kinda dull is part of that. However, another part of Wildbow is that, as much as he "improvises" these stories, he does have a hard time letting go of plot beats if he likes them. The worst example of this is the plague at the end of Ward, timed perfectly with COVID, that had half the fandom in a state of constant outrage. So he kept Rain, figured he'd do something interesting with him, but didn't really figure it out by the time Rain entered the narrative in 2.5. He didn't re-figure who of5 was, he just worked on his instincts and tried to write his way out of where he got except he never quite did and the result is that Rain is someone we are told was totally a bad person offscreen, where the guy we get is basically an average egg.
#ward#rain#bad character analysis#really terrible theorycrafting#really i'm just annoyed that tristan basically has what rain's arc should have been#tristan still deals with the shit he needs to atone for as do sveta chris kenzie and ashley#love that wildbow committed so hard to chris sucking#also this is why taylor was edited to not be transphobic#even though lets face it taylor would definitely say transphobic shit
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So here are my thoughts on my first time seeing a live BMC production!
Making this non-rebloggable, I am not a real theater critic and I do not want to draw any attention to this actual cast on an anonymous blog to strangers on the internet
For starters, casting!
I respect the variety going on here and the degree of diverging from famous character appearance-tropes. Tiny Latino Jeremy who's as fit as a gymnast and can (and does) do acrobatic spin kicks sometimes? Love it. Plus-size butch-esque Brooke? 10/10. Genderfuckery long-haired Michael who gesticulates with a huge fan through most conversations? Hell yeah. Pink-haired Nirvana-grunge-style trans guy Jake? Now we're talking. Christine a head taller than Jeremy? Awesome.
I will not get too into describing actual real people on here much more than that but in general it was wonderful to see a wide range of character-actor types inhabiting these roles. As someone involved in The Fandom, even though I have frequently expounded upon the mutability of character traits per the text, you do still absorb a general idea of what the characters "look" like; so it was a fun twist to have literally none of the performers fall into those tropes.
I will also say - and this is not a read - that I am no longer going to assume I'm too old to play any of these characters, because I guess that's the magic of community theater lol
On to Thoughts, which I will loosely group by characters:
Rich was fucking awesome. Like I was impressed by the singing skill across the board, but this guy fucking killed it at every turn. I looked at my friend I went with after The Squip Song and we both were like OH OK. Rich also wore mostly KISS T-shirts? Like the shitty glam rock band? But yknow, work. Excellent voice (if casting were a little more 'stereotypical,' he probably would be an excellent Michael). Emotionally, he was on the more explosive side while SQUIPped, melting toward just charmingly cute once in 'real Rich Goranski' mode.
The aforementioned Jake was an interesting take on the character. Definitely leaned more into the kind of douchey side of things, but did at least at one point seem genuinely into Christine (although the actor was very much leaning into the interpretation 'yeah he has multiple interests and he honestly likes them all in the moment but gets bored quickly, and that includes girlfriends'). Is that kind of shitty? Yes. Is that a realistic take on what a rich popular 17 year old might be like? Also yes. Nirvana-fan Jake was not a concept I thought of before but I was down for it (though I discovered later on the cast instagram page that the guy playing Jake said that his version of Jake thinks Nirvana is a clothing brand which, like, galaxy-brain take lol).
THE SQUIP!!!!! Actually cycled through Keanu Reeves costumes, which I loved. Started out in Bill & Ted, then Matrix, then POINT BREAK of all things, before landing on a pretty-impressive-for-the-budget version of the light-up circuitry priest robe thing from the Broadway style. He had the hair and beard pretty close to present-day Keanu too, which made him both line up with the resemblance and seem significantly older than the other characters; voice-wise, this guy was clearly a skilled baritone, which meant his delivery on some of the more rock-style songs was a bit unusual, but not bad. This SQUIP was suave at the right parts but did NOT shy away from being scary: the 'take me inside you' part with Brooke during Upgrade was staged very menacingly with regards to how he was physically moving around/behind Jeremy. The Play was delightfully sinister, leaning HARD into the SQUIP as literally puppeteering everyone: saying their lines and moving his hands like marionnettes throughout, keeping things very creepy and villainous.
On the topic of the play, the fight choreography kicked ass. Mr. Reyes's ALL THE WAY TO BROADWAY rant was delivered while he yanked Jeremy off the ground by his shirtfront and then threw him furiously across the stage, genuinely concerning and upsetting to watch (especially as the SQUIP was miming the same actions and lines behind him, obviously in control of Reyes's body) (I literally said 'oh fuck' out loud when it happened and got a Look from the presumably-grandma in the row ahead lol). The fight choreography during Two Player Game Reprise was also solid: the guy playing Jeremy was FIT and did a lot of impressive acrobatic kicks and such, and the person playing Michael being a lot taller and larger worked well with letting him like bounce off, lift him up for spin kicks, etc.
And in general, I respected how much this production was willing to let certain moments be dark. The Play in general was pretty horror-movie-climax; I also respected that the costuming did indeed look like so-so high school mockups of a modern zombie movie. But the whole number was eerie, SQUIPPED character movements and voices became unnervingly smooth and robotic, and positioning the SQUIP as the puppetmaster in the middle, literally moving the characters around, just sold the whole thing wonderfully. Very appropriately leaning into the horror part of horror-comedy.
Similarly, Do You Wanna Hang? was scary. AS IT SHOULD BE. My friend who came with me compared it favorably to the car scene in the movie 8th Grade, where you're just On Edge the whole time you're watching. The actress playing Chloe did a good job with it, that's an uncomfortable thing to portray but she went for it and it paid off in the moment.
Chloe and Brooke had a fun dynamic: the styles of the costuming/performers did add some interesting dimensions. Chloe was, as usual, pink and perfect and feminine, head-cheerleader vibes; Brooke was short haired and dressed a lot more masculine. Brooke had a very earnest sense of vulnerability to her, and excellent comedic timing during Do You Wanna Ride and The Smartphone Hour, as well as just the minor background-acting moments. They leaned pretty hard into the 'Chloe will take things just because Brooke wanted them, because she likes that Brooke is always a little jealous of her, and thinks that that's friendship' and, like the portrayal of Jake: is that a shitty thing to do? Yes. Is that a realistic thing teenagers might do, especially poisoned by toxic ideas about femininity and power? Also yes.
Which is a good spot to add, the ensemble was small (4) but they were serving it. The band appeared to be octogenarian church volunteers (oh, yeah, this was at a church??? Wesleyan Methodists, so the cool liberal branch of American Christianity) so I will say that with what they had, they were making it work. It would have been served well by a second keyboardist and/or guitarist to do the trumpet parts (it was drums, bass, guitar, and piano). One of the ensemble members, a tall goth-femme person with hot pink hair, played the role of the theremin by doing the melodies in remarkable and ethereal bel canto. And honestly, work.
Jenna Rolan was fun: could belt for the gods, had some pretty-intense Crazy Eyes thing going on that really sold the comedic moments and made her appropriately frightening as the Final Boss in the squipped battle at the end, styled like an early 2000s-lesbian-coded-soft-goth best friend archetype. No notes, 11/10.
The actor playing Mr. Heere/Reyes/Stockboy did a fantastic job of making those three seem separate, and as I mentioned above, really made Mr. Reyes come to life in a dynamic way. Sidenote, this production changed all references to Hobby Lobby to Michaels, which I found both funny and appropriate. Fuck Hobby Lobby, we all hate Hobby Lobby.
Back to characterizations, Christine was sweet and straightforward. Not as quirky or dynamic as Stephanie or a lot of other actresses make her, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Very gentle and smooth voice, she just really likes theater and wants someone to like the real her. They went with ballet-style choreography to introduce her during More Than Survive, which is always a wonderful touch for the way the music swells. There were points where I think a little more creative movement or a wider emotional range might have worked well, but the take on the character was consistent.
I am going to keep that positive thread through the next sections: while I might not have agreed with the interpretation through the text, I do respect going in a starkly different direction to how most productions and fans usually take such things.
I have enormous respect for the performer playing Michael for radically making it their own. The cast bios had pronouns, and Michael's performer was they/she/he, which as a fellow they/she/he who would love to play Michael someday was rad to see. They kept the CREEPS shirt and a hoodie with a lot of patches (albeit a black one with red accents), but that was about it. Michael had light-up cat ear headphones and a huge black fan which he used throughout, alternated between baggy sweatpants or just a floor-length hippy skirt, usually high-heel ankle boots, and some kind of green bathrobe thing for The Pants Song? Characterization, again, respect for making such an iconic character so heavily different. This Michael was not....very emotional. He was usually snippy and sarcastic in a very erudite and matter-of-fact way, at pretty much all points in the show. Not a lot of emotional range going on: this is a Michael who is in some combination of 'doesn't give a shit' and 'not going to let this bother me,' which came off....interesting. The chemistry this created with Jeremy was a starkly different one than we usually see. The original productions - and most since, and the majority of fandom depictions - imagines a Michael and Jeremy who, at their core, love each other a lot. However that manifests of course varies, but you Usually get the impression that (even with a little bit of codependence), these two genuinely love each other and spending time together, which makes moments in the show either heartwarming or devastating to see happen between them.
Not these versions of the characters.
Which didn't make it bad, but it did shake things up. This Michael and Jeremy didn't give deep-love-friendship so much as they gave 'we sat next to each other in 1st grade and don't have other friends. so. I guess we're best friends, huh.'
Which is an INTERESTING and somewhat bleaker, but not unrealistic, take on them. That, sadly, summarizes a lot of friendships, especially at that age and with the sort of vacuum of suburbia on your social sphere (nevermind how a lot of society discourages boys from emotional connection with their friends; if anything, the fact that this Michael was definitely queer might suggest that Jeremy even pulled back emotionally because he didn't want to seem gay or give this Michael the wrong idea). It definitely sells Jeremy feeling lonely, even with his best friend hanging around. Two-Player Game came across a LOT better than I was prepared for - I have waxed about how it's a hard number to pull off - not in spite of, but almost because of this. Like, sure, they've played through this game a million times before, they know every beat, they love it like they love each other, right? even though they seem.....kind of bored. Or at least like they're waiting for something else to happen. College? Girlfriend? Different friends? Just wait two years. Whatever.
To get critical, I will say that this dynamic did not really help Michael in the Bathroom. The fight beforehand and the song itself did.....not really lend themselves to a not-very-emotional friendship between them. The singing was perfect, so not faulting that: it's THE big song of the show, so that's a lot of pressure and the performer had a splendid voice, but the snarky-not-caring-that-much attitude didn't quite do it for me - Michael didn't seem sad or upset so much as pissed off, but still fully keeping it together (despite the lyrics saying otherwise). Tonally, the 'wish I'd offed myself instead' just sounded sarcastic ("wow, SORRY I CARED AT ALL, could've just killed myself for all you seem to care" kind of vibes) THAT SAID, it was consistent with the rest of the characterization, so I admire it as a very specific acting choice. There were also characters on stage - presumably outside the bathroom door, listening in - that turned a good portion of MITB into a comedic number; as I have said before, not my personal take on how that should go, but the audience was laughing along with it! So that's the wonderful mutability of theater.
Strangely enough, this actually made Michael and Jeremy's relationship at the end of the story work out just fine? The SQUIP experience kind of sparked a "wow we really do care about each other, huh" realization from both of them. Again, mad respect for taking such a different approach to such a well-worn character relationship.
So, overall, I am very happy I got to see this. Love to support live theater, love to be surprised by a story that I thought I knew pretty well inside and out, came away with plenty to think and talk about. If you can, go support your local community theater!
#be more chill#soliloquy#michael mell#jeremy heere#christine canigula#jake dillinger#rich goranski#chloe valentine#brooke lohst#jenna rolan#the squip
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TRANS SANJI RAMBLE!!
I am an enjoyer of headcanons and WILL and HAVE headcanoned the straw hats and other characters with different/conflicting headcanons bc you wanna know why?? I can make different universes and versions of them bc DAMN a lot of these headcanons are hella good
Though I will say, as an enjoyer of headcanons, I am in a drought of transmasc Sanji stuff <\3 I DUNNO IF IM LOOKING IN THE WRONG PLACES OR NOT qwq
+before anyone says, I adore transfem Sanji w all my heart and I am glad she gets the representation bc WOW a lot of people are clever w the stuff they come up will, I really do love it and a lot of you even think of things I would’ve never thought about !! ^o^ jus a little bummed out there’s not as much transmasc Sanji content bc as soon as I saw him on screen I was like “the radar is going off”
ps if you read this far, transmasc Sanji headcanons (hear me out, most likely ooc) (also zosan)
I have been thinking about them SOOO MUCH tbh.. Sanji doesn’t feel 100% while cooking because of cramps?? You bet Zoro will notice and try and help out best he can in the kitchen despite how many times he would get kicked and/or yelled at..
sparring?? Sanji feel miserable and always thinks Zoro is going easy on him so he accidentally blurts it out one time while they are going at it and Zoro is just like “No lmao??” And might reveal smth about Kuina.. and then Sanji cries about it because even in smth like sparring he’s seen as equal to him
I think during WCI (I have not.. watched it yet teehee) while Sanji sees his brothers + sister again they’re all like “what the fuck happened to you” and Sanji is all high guarded about it but says he’s trans and he’s a guy now and they’re all like “oh ok, anyway-“ and it goes on like normal but they respect him (please pleaseeee)
Sanji while he’s with Zeff,, ofc Zeff is like “well now I got an 8-9 year old daughter to take care of” and Sanji doesn’t mind at first because he doesn’t exactly know what he’s feeling but he knows that being called “daughter” doesn’t feel right. I feel like he would discover later on what being trans meant from a frequent customer and he’s all happy because!! Wow he found out!! What best describes him!! And the next time he talks to Zeff he’s all like “so you know that regular we get through the door?” And then tells Zeff and Zeff is all like “well then, I’m happy either way for you, do you want your hair cut or different clothes?”
Running with ideas,, Sanji would probably be scared of taking testosterone/one piece equivalent because of the needles if they didn’t have a gel form. Which is why awhile after chopper joins he asks the little reindeer about it..
I also have a feeling Sanji would be afraid of surgery?? He wants to get top surgery but the idea is SO scary to him,, so he ops for binding,,
Mainly Zoro but also the crew has to remind him to not bind for too long since he can get caught up in cooking, Zoro will ALWAYS ask him to take whatever he binds with off before they spar/fight not wanting to let the cook hurt himself
this is it this is the post (I’m so mentally I’ll)
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