#which to be fair I understand my blog is a chaos of so many things

[crowned-clown-rising]

Tag game: tag 9 people you want to know better

Favourite colour: Mahogany-maroon-burgundy + purple-ish relatives

Last song: Body to flame by Lucy Dacus & iris cover by Chris Lanzon

Currently reading:

fanfic: Spirit of the West by teen_dean novel: Greywaren by Maggie Stiefvater other: Microbiota by Ignacio López-Goñi (and a couple of other stuff about witchcraft and norse mithology that I'm not going to bother mentioning bc no one is interested really and they're too many)

Last movie: Ophelia (2018)

Sweet/spicy/savoury: Yeah you can say I'm into sweets. (Looks like L from death note) I DO HATE mixing the flavors. I HATE HATE when something that's supposed to be salty IS SWEET. Like a hamburger. (Who does that?) (freaks >:( )

Currently working on: My Eldarya fic :) and other 2 started fics :) and my star trek sewing stuff :) and some watercolor drawings for my sister&niece :) yes I have adhd

No-pressure tags: @oracleofselfies @leannathespacewerewolf @isatisnn @kingof-the-crossroads @tropicalflavors @onceandfuturewarlqck @themangahead @ultimatebottom69 @lexa-gui

tag game - tag 9 people you want to get to know better

I was tagged by: @thatonetimetraveller

Favourite colour: blue! 

Last song: “Please Don’t Leave Quite Yet” - Adam Agin 

Currently reading: I’m listening to the Fellowship on audiobook whenever I work on art, and reading Rhythm of War by Brandon Sanderson :) 

Last movie: Paradise - a german dystopian film on Netflix set in the near future. A company has figured out how to suck out literal years of people’s lives (princess bride style) and sell them to the highest bidder, to tack on and extend the buyer’s lifetime. It feels like a really long black mirror episode. I had a good time! 

Sweet/spicy/savoury: all of the above? Depends on the day and my mood. Though leaning more toward spicy/savory than sweet. 

Currently working on: To Partake and Boundless Sky :) 

No-Pressure tags:

@raointean @metatomatoes @ellrond @the-commonplace-book @creativepromptsforwriting @eldritchteletubbie @disorganisedautodidact @greyjedijaneite @founder-of-imladris and anyone else who wants to tbh 

[yakool-foolio]

gundham for the ask game?? i lov him

GUNDHAM GODDAMN TANAKA MY FIRST LOVE IN DANGANRONPA

Favorite thing about him: His dialect is sososo fun and interesting to analyze. I think he's the main reason I became so obsessed with analyzing and making up my own canon compliant dialect for Vivia. Gundham sparked that fire of dissecting metaphors n analogies and translating them to better understand his behavior and how he conveys his thoughts and feelings through speech. It's incredibly entertaining to write for him, so much so that about two years ago I made my own ask blog for him being in Dead By Daylight's universe. Gotta combine the brainrots of the time somehow.

Least favorite thing about him: Out of all the members of the Ultimate Despair, Gundham feels the least likely to ever end up on their side. It has just never sat right with me that he would fall into despair that easily in the anime, especially since he fought so hard against it in the game. I understand that Chiaki meant a lot to her classmates, but her death doesn't feel like the straw that should break the camel's back for Gundham, notably because he's the one who will literally fight to the death to revive everyone else's morale. The anime is a guilty pleasure of mine, but I refuse to believe that he'd give in to despair that easy. I like his Ultimate Despair design though, it's rad. Too bad we only get to see it once.

Favorite line: He has soooooooooo many iconic and fantastic lines it's not fair to choose one, but I will restrain myself just this once. "Because I, the one who has claimed dominion over evil, am the Ultimate Weapon! I am he who cuts the insolent catalyst which flows out from the chaos with the sword of victory… It's only fitting that I deserve to be called the Ultimate Weapon…!" The fact that he called himself the Ultimate Weapon because he utilized the funhouse's secret after he discovered it in order to kill Nekomaru HURTS REAL BAD. He planted hints to him being the culprit throughout the entire trial because it was never his intent to get away with his murder at all, especially since he fully expected to be the victim himself. He and Nekomaru sacrificed themselves so that the others could live on. I cry.

BROTP: Gundham and Gonta are such a sweet duo in UTDP and Summer, they deserve so many more interactions. They get to exchange their love of all different types of animals with each other until they're walking National Geographic magazines.

OTP: SONDAM! They match each other's dorkiness to a T. Autumn is their season and nobody can take it away from them. Horror movie dates are always a pleasure. They're obnoxious talkers in the theaters, but I'd let them ramble to their heart's content.

NOTP: I'm the type of person who's chill with a lotta different pairings if the shipper(s) make it work. However, one pair I can never imagine being romantically involved is Gundham and Hiyoko. He doesn't give two shits about her bullying him for his eccentrics, but he definitely greatly disapproves of her abuse toward animals. She's trying to better herself post-game, but it'll definitely take a while for her misdeeds to be forgiven by Gundham and they can work toward being on friendly terms.

Random headcanon: Due to isolating himself from others, Gundham never really took the time to question his romantic orientation. That is, until he was accepted into Hope's Peak Academy and was surrounded by other students. He swiftly came to terms with his romantics towards certain people, as sparse as he shows it. Nekomaru and Sonia definitely pushed those unknown feelings into deeper consideration, as he admittedly crushed on both of them at some point and has ultimately fallen for Sonia. He fights with himself every now and then over his feelings, but overall he views his orientation as simply natural, unchanged by time. In regards to his asexuality, he occasionally makes comments to conceal his distaste for raunchy things and attempt to fit in, pushed into doing so by his insecurities, but he recognizes its his true nature to abstain from such desires. Intimacy is romantic for him, and that's all that it has to be for him to be happy.

Unpopular opinion: I have no idea if any of my thoughts could really be classified as unpopular, but I'll toss something unusual out. Connecting to what I've stated earlier, I wish Gundham was shown fighting back more against the brainwashing in the anime. If they had the time, it'd be interesting to see the absolute extremes Junko would have to go through to crush Gundham's unwavering spirit. We could get real dark by having his mom killed in front of him. This forces him to accept that without her, only nature is on his side now, as humanity is beyond saving and what he's committing as an Ultimate Despair is a mercy killing.

Song(s) I associate with him: Kyrie by Mr. Mister cause the angelic imagery makes me sob profusely aughhhh... Eighth Wonder by Lemon Demon and When You Die by MGMT are runner-ups!

Favorite picture of him: This art piece I was gifted as part of a Silent Hill Tumblr Mutuals discord server's Secret Santa, featuring Gundham n Carmina/The Artist from Dead By Daylight, who I made ask blogs for and so deeply love imagining being the bestest of buds!

[margindoodles2407]

Greetings from the Margins

Sup? My name is MarginDoodles2407, but y'all can call me Margin :]

The most important thing to know about me? I am Roman Catholic, Pro-Life, and Anti-Pornography. By the way, my definition of pro-life is not just "anti-abortion", although that is a big part of it. I believe that to be truly pro-life, you must make a commitment to extend the respect and dignity we deserve as human beings to EVERYONE, regardless of age, health, status, physical characteristics, gender, political ideology, et cetera. And my Catholic faith is central to who I am as a person, so while I try not to get political on this blog- because we all need fun places to hang out without the stress of the real world- I will not hesitate to post about my Catholicism and Pro-Lifery. If that’s not your jam? Understandable. But please, be respectful to my Religion and values, as I will be to yours.

This blog started out as a Zelda blog and uh, it quickly became a Star Wars blog. From this sentence alone, you can probably guess my two biggest fandoms. My natural habitat is openly weeping about warrior space monks with laser swords and a fictional army of genetically identical South Pacific Islander men. Speaking of which, I am The Fives Guy. Do you wanna talk about Fives? Do you have Questions (tm) about Fives? Has this man crossed your mind at all? Well actually I am in the process of writing an Essay about him, which I will link to this post when I finish.

In terms of Zelda, my favorite character is the boy himself, my guy Link, and my favorite game is Ocarina of Time, and even though I am mainly a Star Wars blog now, I am ALWAYS down to talk about Zelda because these games were part of my formative years, I am still a huge nerd about them, and they are very near and dear to my heart. I cannot stress how much I still love Zelda.

I am an Artist and an Author, and requests for both are always open. Just keep it Safe for Work :) In case you’re interested, my AO3 is Margin_Doodles.

Alright let's talk about a few more things. Namely, the Tagging System, and what on earth it means.

Zelda Tags (main tag: #the legend of zelda or #tloz)

#hero's spirit: The blog, @tloz-heros-spirit, that I run with my EXCELLENT best friend and partner-in-crime, @whyoneartheven. A concept for a potential Zelda game that would be, canonically, the final game in the series and break the Curse of Demise. If you like lore-accurate storytelling, over-the-top character designs, and seafoam-green ghost fire, give it a check-out! Fair warning, though, I haven't updated this one in a while, but if you'd like to talk about it I'd love to!

#margin's links: My interpretations of the various Links, Zeldas, and NPCs of the Zelda series. Includes meaningful meta, silly art, memes, and various questions and answers.

#my beloved hyrule warriors: I talk about my second-favorite Zelda game, Hyrule Warriors, which I am mentally unwell about

#zelink my beloved: I am a Zelink shipper. It has me in a chokehold

Star Wars Tags (main tag: #star wars)

#hfsw: My precious baby, the High Fantasy Star Wars AU. Basically I take Star Wars, and make it a High Fantasy AU. I don't know how much more on-the-nose the title could be. This one also has its own blog, @high-fantasy-sw, although I'm not always great about cross-posting. Includes overly-intricate worldbuilding, SO MANY FREAKING MEMES, very flowery prose writing, even more silly art, and lightsabers but they're actually just swords on fire.

#wdap au: Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard and Senator Riyo Chuchi of Pantora are madly in love. This saves the Galaxy. 50% whump and angst, 50% crack-treated-seriously absolute chaos nonsense. Another collab with @whyoneartheven, this started out as a personal canon-compliant slowburn tragedy but then took a 180 degree pivot and became our silly fix-it romance AU, featuring a begrudging-coworkers-to-reluctant-allies-to-mutual-respecters-to-genuine-friends-to-mutual-pining-to-lovers-to-totalitarian-government-topplers storyline, the What to Do About Palpatine Tea Club (from which the au derives its abbreviation), Padme "Been There Done That" Amidala planning a secret wedding, and Robot Hand Buddies Mace Windu and Anakin Skywalker, to name a few of the better jokes.

#newsies au: Blame the twisted mind of @luke-shywalker for this one; I was sick and decided to watch Newsies, and at her suggestion I liveblogged it. Then things got out of hand. Featuring Crutchie!Echo, Obi-Wan Kenobi In The Person Of Teddy Roosevelt, and "they have interplanetary travel but still read paper news?".

#baseball au: The Clone Wars, as a series of really high-stakes baseball games. I came up with this one on my birthday with one of my real-life friends. Featuring Political Baseball Intrigue.

#margin watches tcw: I watch The Clone Wars (2008), and provide commentary

#margin watches tbb: I watch The Bad Batch, and provide commentary

#rebels my beloved: the Star Wars Rebels tag

#master disaster himself: Anakin. The Anakin Tag.

#electric judgement: the Plo Koon tag

#look at my guys: the Clones tag. I need to get better at actually USING this tag, but it does exist.

#in this house we love and respect her grace duchess satine kryze of mandalore: the Satine tag

#maul is a drama queen: the Darth Maul tag

Personal Tags:

#margin doodles: my art

#margin writes: my writing

#margin rambles: my soliloquies

#you ask margin babbles: answers to asks

#memes by margin: my memes

#incorrect quotes: incorrect quotes, usually by me

#the vod'e: I talk about my siblings (i have a LOT of siblings)

#friend art: my friends' art! very cool, totally recommend

#catholicism: Catholicism :)

Fic Masterlist

Thanks for reading, thanks for checkin' out my blog, and May the Force Be With You!

[vole-mon-amour]

2x04 (sorry for no cut but i need to be able to see the entire post on my blog for certain reasons)

That's my kind of gal.

Why is Nikolai being called Sobachka aka a doggy?

THEY'RE DOING IT???? AHHHH!!! I dislike how they're rushing through CK, but god, it's one of the greatest moments in the book! This makes me smile.

"To all of that", including "Yes, I can't do this without you." That's why I ship them. Jesper is so easygoing. He UNDERSTANDS Kaz. What they share is so special. Jesper wouldn't mind big words, but he'll do just fine without them. I can't stress enough how much he loves him & how it's mutual.

The fact that Jesper fucked up the entire thing in the book, and Kaz didn't say him a word until his patience reached it's absolute limit. Even the physical fight they had in Ck until Colm stopped them. How they brushed it off and continued with their lives, their plan, their relationship.

I just love them SO much. I wouldn't change these two for any other ship in this universe. If I was asked to choose just one ship, they'd be the one.

"Among them, it passed for good luck." <3

NINA. LMAOOO. Honestly, only she can do that. Which is a bit brutal, but also... She knows her worth and he allows her. But also, that woman is loyal and smart. They'll get there eventually.

I really like the scene where David explains to Alina how it all happened. What Darkling has now and how dangerous it is. As it turns out, I just dislike him near Darkling, but overall he seems to be an alright kind of guy.

Me: This is my fav character. Also me: Aww, poor baby suffering. He looks so good while at it.

To be fair, I do have a 'I love me some traumatized characters' tag, after all.

You already did, asshole. Honestly, the fact that he doesn't remember, just like in the book. I can't wait for Kaz's revenge. Get him, my love.

Which also teaches you what? Never trust Pekka fucking Rollins. He'll destroy you and have no regret whatsoever.

(whispers) he's so hot while he's at it. It's so much easier watching the show knowing the books, bc otherwise i'd completely lose my mind over this.

I love him, your honor. The flashback fits so well. The revenge is so sweet when boiling like that. I'm gonna enjoy Rollins' fall.

My booy. <3

"The trick is not to love anything." Because Pekka Rollins once killed what Kaz loved the most. His brother. Yeeeah.

"You'll never find your son in time." I'm a bit disappointed. They wasted the masquerade, the pushed this iconic line from near the end of CK in the middle of the season. What are they doing?

That iconic line, though:

"I want you to remember."

I also find this as a very interesting choice. In the book Inej witnessed Kaz saying that. In here it's Nina and Jesper, which also gives them an understanding of what's going on and what Kaz Brekker really is. I can't say I can complain. It's a smart move. And they nailed this. Even though too early, they nailed this.

I know Kaz wouldn't appreciate a hug, so I'd like to sit next to him and be there for him. And this is the scene that made me want to cry. Oh, Kaz. I love him with all my heart. What a character.

That smile. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. ;_; Yeah, crying now. Also, the fact that Nina looks back at Jesper, asking if it's the right time and Jesper shakes his head. I'm not tired to say that Jesper knows him.

;______; I'm giving this episode 10/10 just for this entire scene. Losing it, besties.

I'm gonna need so many fics after this episode. Fics that address Jesper's feelings of hearing Kaz's story. I'm gonna need Kaz to call Jesper Jordie. I'm gonna need all of that.

Jesper: "I like the chaos. The gamble of Barrel life. Never knowing what comes next." Sooo... you like Kaz. :) Also, I remember people talking about this before (during the books), but isn't it suspicious that Jesper likes Wylan for this reason? Because it very much screams Kaz. VERY much. So again, if Kaz was more available... Kazper is canon, one way or another. So much to explore tbh. I'm full of inspiration again (and I haven't even finished my previous 3 wips :)))

Also, the way Jesper easily goes for a quickie with Wylan, which basically means he'd fuck Kaz if he could. Because all the traits show!Wylan has, it's all (and more) in Kaz already. And Jesper knew Kaz for years, so I think the conclusion is very logical.

I'm not giving this 10/10 bc of how they ruined Wesper. But. This was a very long, but a very good episode. So much important information. I even watched parts with Alina and Nikolai, which is VERY rare for me. I'm usually not interested in that part of the show at all.

This is so far my fav episode, but I'm really disappointed that there was no That Iconic Masquerade Line.

[zhongrin]

Bravo, Meirin.

Thank you for the Netflix style version of a suspense novel. This EBG was a masterclass is DM and RP work. I thought the way things played out was impressive, and I am impressed in how you used even seemingly unrelated one-off asks (like the grandmother ask, the ask about the weather in Mingyun Village, the investigator asks) to flesh out the story into such an interesting one. It had so many twists and turns, and I was kept on the edge of my seat.

I will say that I didn't expect the ask about the Gardemeks to make its debut at the end and with pictures, no less. I sent that along with the Treasure Hoarder Ask at the end as a one off to see how much further things could escalate within the confines of the EBG, and I was not disappointed.

Due to when EBG happened and the times it fell, I'd often be asleep when the major happenings occurred. (Darn you, timezones!) I admit, I lost more than my fair share of sleep trying to keep up with what happened. But when I'd get up in the morning, I would grab my breakfast and read through what happened on your blog. It felt like I was reading a really engaging story.

That being said, I thought the way you approached this EBG was very clever, especially with how you worked within the constraints of the rules. While the EBG required you to "simp" so to speak for the assigned character, it didn't say who had to do it and how it had to be done. I also thought it was very clever to make it so that Childe and Meirin weren't together romantically, which both worked to free up the ooc side of you to work on the God Remains and Coviello/Dresvi plotlines, while giving you the freedom to write Childe as you wanted, especially since you mentioned having a hard time "simping" for him.

I also appreciated that you didn't shy away from people's theories during the event either. You weren't scared of spoilers. You knew where you wanted to go with the story and stuck to your guns when making the story and answering the asks, and that made it all the more satisfying when you revealed the truth of the matter.

That being said, I did take a backseat to the chaos later on in the EBG, since it seems like other people were pushing the story forward (and I ended up doing some other shenanigans).

But I still came back to your blog every day during the week it was active for EBG. I found it fun to watch, and I ended up enjoying myself.

This ask is getting way too long, so I'll send another one with follow up questions for the EBG later. I'm curious about the writing and preparation process.

Thank you again for the wonderful time and the amazing story, Meirin! It was fun playing with you, and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing your shenanigans here and on other blogs as well. ^^

✌️

alright, okay, i've reread this countless times now and i think i'm ready to release it because man. this hits HARD (in a /pos way ofc)

how you used even seemingly unrelated one-off asks

please 😭 i'm glad it's not annoying anyone that i did this because i understand it could be, especially if the asker didn't meant for the ask to be answered that way - but some of them are so perfect as the plot accompanient and i couldn't help myself ;w;

I will say that I didn't expect the ask about the Gardemeks to make its debut at the end and with pictures, no less

oh my goodness. that ask. when i received it on day 2, i went :D haha. hahahahahahaha *insert maniacal laughter here* ahem. i meant, it was a HIGHLY interesting ask and i knew i had to use it nearing the end. thank you so much for sending that in and giving me the opportunity to draw more unhinged childe!!

I sent that along with the Treasure Hoarder Ask at the end

that was you too?! HLSDLSDFK hahahah honestly i really did want to make meirin fight them off but considering the plot and her condition, i didn't think it would make sense? in baizhu's story quest we know how jiangliang almost fell down a cliff when he was chronically seeking out the mother lode, so yeah, i didn't think she would be in any condition to fight. hence i stuck with that approach and yeeted the bad ending just to say 'hey, just saying, i WILL kill meirin if i have to' LOL

I admit, I lost more than my fair share of sleep trying to keep up with what happened

darn timezones!!! and hsldkfjskldf you and me both comrade. i think my sleep schedule this ebg (and last ebg too tbh) is a WRECK. actually, let me just check something real qui-

............. yeahhhh. uh. for someone who usually sleeps 6-8 hours a day.......... leeeeeet's not talk about that :D i will have to pay those sleep debts this weekend for sure. but it was worth it, heh.

But when I'd get up in the morning, I would grab my breakfast and read through what happened on your blog

the way i also do this with the replies section when i wake up too lol everyone's comments were my morning tabloid, i read through them with a smile as i sip my coffee >:D but gods. that. that's such an honor.... thank you for being so invested in it ;w;

While the EBG required you to "simp" so to speak for the assigned character, it didn't say who had to do it and how it had to be done

HAHAH gotta exploit the loopholes yk? ;))

I also appreciated that you didn't shy away from people's theories during the event either

ahhh thank you <3 i try not to give out special treatments even to my friends as much as possible and i actually LOVE seeing them theorising and discussing things in posts/replies. it also kinda gauges whether i'm doing things right, whether i should make the hints more obvious, etc. so they actually help a lot in developing the story too, in a sense!

But I still came back to your blog every day during the week it was active for EBG

i am so so so honored ;w; like really. the fact that people cares enough to ACTUALLY VISIT my blog? insane. that's. such a thing that i'm still partly unable to believe even now. most people stay in their dashboard and scroll. the fact that people actually went to my blog JUST to see the ebg contents is just. hngngngnnngngng

This ask is getting way too long, so I'll send another one with follow up questions for the EBG later. I'm curious about the writing and preparation process.

i'll be waiting for that follow up ask because i would love to elaborate more on the ebg given the opportunity to, but no pressure really! i'm just glad that you and everyone else had fun <3

thank you again, kind nonnie. i'll be sure to keep this in my treasure box and reread it a few hundred more times ❤️

[sharonisthebettercarter]

ain't no shame in havin' much to learn<3 the more we learn, the more we realize how much shit there is to learn and i am still learnin' too and it is a RIDE<3<3<3 but more than happy to share ideas~<3 if you want any more, i'm down to discuss~<3<3<3 and you can sift through the 'butchlander prompts'/'butchlander' tags on my blog for some more and definitely hectic ramblings of a mad crackhead. (do be warned lol, mpreg obsessed and no holds barred but a sucker for happy endings, and i tend to write way too much crap, this un's a doozy too)

also lmao falling way too deep into the butchlander/the boys rabbit hole way too quick. SAME<3

butt listen...

and WARNING: this may *actually* inspire you to do *bottom stiles*/*top wolves* (lmao, idk, not familiar with the dynamics of the ship/show as never watched but a guess ;) who knows, maybe it'll make you love it moar tho<3<3<3)

butt~ going back to that idea<3

there is absolutely something truly tantalizing about the 'strong' bowing before/handing over the reigns to the 'fragile', but i've always interpreted what that means (along with powerplay/dom/sub/balancing things out) a little differently from others i suppose~<3

i have always loved the idea 'protect those who cannot protect themselves' (why i love the hero genre in general)

but see (in my crazy eyes at least) the kink for the more powerful character bottoming/subbing comes from a desire to balance out the ship a certain way, which fair enough. it's a kink, it works~<3 hell, i feel it~<3<3<3

but i've never thought top/bottom had much to do with that<3 all superficial to me baby lol~<3 (or i guess a little different, what's annoying is that most of the discourse assumes a partner can't 'top' without penetrating the other which is... wrong. semantics mostly, but also kinda scary, i don't think many typically receptive partners realize that they have the power to *break* a dick *accidentally* without proper care, not kidding :(((() butt allow me to elaborate ;)

normally we see and understand dom top and sub bottom, and that's all fine and dandy~<3 it's a classic<3!

but what about our dom bottoms and sub tops or similar~<3<3<3? i think they need a little lovin' too<3 ;))))))))))))

there is so much to explore when it comes to character dynamics and gah, i just... i always feel like people tend to box them in based on who they want to top or bottom without actually *exploring* just what those dynamics could be *based* on the characters themselves/letting the characters fall into the roles naturally<3<3<3 (speakin' on general past fandom experience lol, not familiar with sterek but i LOVE your defiant spirit to go against the grain, it is lovely and stick to you if that's what you like<3 little fandom chaos never hurt ;))))))))))))))))))) and i do get it, cause it's a full out conspiracy here to keep our one true bottom billy boo under wraps and out of sight and i'm just like... y'all motherfuckers better get ready cause bitch is comin' out to play~<3<3<3)

and also, more importantly, the people who think you should cater to them can screw off<3 sincerely<3<3<3

i wanna promote positivity by spreading what i like and hopefully get others to join in. if there's criticism to be had? sure. it helps us improve, but i can't stand when people go as far as trying to bar someone from what they love

even as i, like a mega snob, internally say 'trash' every time i scroll on by a fic/piece' i don't/wouldn't like would

a. never demand the artist/writer not produce it, 'don't like don't read' exists for a fucking reason so there is NEVER a need to denounce or harass people (over fictional nonsense no less!), and

b. REMIND MYSELF THAT I AM ALSO TRASH AND HAVE AN INTERNAL CACKLE at myself~ EVERY TIME!

we are ALL trash, and that is part of the beauty of it<3! even if *you*, lovely beautiful amazing darling that you are, decide you don't like bottom billy in the end? welp, goddammit, but you know what, that's okay<3 cause it's your art, your perogative, your right to do it how you want<3<3<3 ;)

i'm getting worked up because of the emboldened anons you seem to get that think they have a right to tell you 'no' on your own art!? excuse me?? you handle it perfectly and sweetly but i would be making a fucking storm with that, that behavior pisses me off so much and is so fucked up. >:(

it's one thing to gently ask/pay for/want to motivate a creative to do something. it is another entirely to *demand* something of a creative OR demand the *not*.

fuck that shit. *you do NOT owe ANYONE an apology for liking bottom billy* >:((((((((

but anywho~<3 for me it just gets so old so quick, especially as someone who LOVES character exploration/analysis, and wants to actually read/see 'these characters' in the ship, or at least alternate versions of them, not just 'OCs vaguely based on their most superficial elements/wearing their skin' it puts the lotion in the basket

am i a little bitter... yes MAYBE-- (i just feel so played/tricked half the time and it doesn't even have to matter who tops or bottoms, i wish i was one of those non-picky lucky bastards that can just read all of it, and i mean ALL OF IT like nothing and get to enjoy it... but alas...)

i also get that majority of people involved in shipping culture are cis het women (my dumb little pansexual nondescript genderfluid longing hermit ass, yes i love lesbians and straights and gays and everything inbetween, gimme all the fucking flavors, what of it<3) and while there's nothing wrong on the surface there, society has its stereotyping issues and heteronormativity explored through stereotyped dominance kink reinforcing the status quo instead of challenging it and blah blah blah, just UGH, i need to stop ramble ranting lmao (please i beg, excuse my lunacy~<3)

it's just so... goddamn REDUCTIVE--

TANGENT OVER, yes i complain too much BACK TO THE POINT!!

the balancing. there's lots of reasons people manage it different ways not limited to the above mentioned, BUTT.

ever heard lady gaga's G.U.Y? literally billy boo's theme song along with judas<3 "the demon i cling to" i'm just kidding it's actually rihanna's SOS

"i don't need to be on top, to know what it does, i'm strong enough to know the truth. i just want it to be hot, because i'm best when i'm in love and i'm in love with you."

right so that line but also the whole fucking song strikes a goddamn CHORD in me you would not believe~<3<3<3 (hell poker face and others play with similar themes<3!)

see there are a couple things that especially don't seem to get explored in fandom as often, unfortunately the shit that resonates with me~<3

addicted lovers~<3 (i don't mean one-sided or maybe i do ;) but can work PERFECTLY for butchlander<3<3<3), nymphomania<3<3<3, superdick<3 (which i forever lament is so underused!! :(((((((((((((), gentle dom/service top<3<3<3<3<3<3

and my personal favorite~<3?

the *dangerous* bossy/bratty bottom<3 (which fits billy boo PERFECTLY<3<3<3 not to be confused with the lovely power bottom<3 but can be inclusive and sometimes covert~<3 ;)))

never underestimate the POWER of a bussy/pussy~<3

see, i'm not too fond of either character being put in a 'vulnurable' position without checks and balances so to speak, often times, i tend to be at odds with the dom top/sub bottom dynamics because while i can love that classic vanilla vibe and have a hella strong dominance kink? they normally don't fit/feel forced/reduce character dimension or end up way way more imbalanced than how they started, at least for me. (i TRIED my damn hardest to read bottom steve rogers back in the day lmao. i did. just couldn't do it because there was that glaring issue every damn time without fail... still there with top steve sometimes but much more rare that way, learned very quickly to channel my preferences and figure out what i like and don't from there tho lol)

for example what i mean is~, i never leave my bottoms without an ace up their sleeve... and many of them have canon aces anyway ;) apart from the whole 'bottoms get the WAY better deal' bit (them prostate orgasms--) and spoiling them to high hell half the time (sometimes there's work through and progress/learning their true strengths)

but for example in a ship? clex (or even superbat, LOVE princess bats<3). lex is so fucking smart, it doesn't matter how strong superman is. the mistake is thinking lex was ever vulnerable to begin with, he is a coward and a control freak, but superman doesn't abuse his powers so lex was never in danger there. that's his ace. and at that point, topping just becomes gratuitous and such a WASTE for lexi. he could be getting railed and served like a goddamn princess<3 who knows what he wants by the ULTIMATE gentle dom/service top

did i mention the vibrating tongue and fingers along with the schlong? so. this gentle giant super gai gots no refractory period. infinite stamina. vibrating appendages. and people don't wanna use all that??? i would die without it

and don't even get me started on that diamond compressing monstrosity he calls an anus--

but more in depth, i would rather lex learn he doesn't *need* to have *control* or 'top' in order to put his trust in him and know that clark would never hurt him (as a crack ship anyhow lol), because it's that trust that makes love~<3 be the g.u.y.~<3... and also. i need lex to be able to say:

"i have the world's most powerful man at my beck and call, wrapped around my finger... what makes you think i would ever give that up?"

and y'know, it just doesn't work quite the same if ya work it the other way<3

and if clark knows? OOH-- because i *need* ultimate bitchy lex and ultimate gentle dom clark who endlessly spoils him because it's such a perfect recreation/expansion of their natural dynamic<3<3<3 (i hate you because i need you/okay but just let me save you tho)

and with billy and homelander~? OOOOOHHHH... these two are *very* special but make a similar dynamic with a dark twist<3.

i mentioned before that billy canon subs for those he loves<3 they make it a point in the comic (and show it in the show) that becky/becca is the gentle dom in the relationship, and billy actually wants it this way because he trusts becca and believes she'll save him from being his father... :((( he actually wants to be grounded/controlled because he knows what he is and can be without that and *hates* it

actually hates it and it's just so sad to me that anyone would make him proudly *want* be his father or worse!? :((((((((((((( even if you believed billy was/had 'more issues with toxic masculinity', i don't understand wanting to encourage/enable it/give him a free pass to be worse??? billy doesn't have the self control to stop it on his own and *that's* what made becca so important to him :((((((( poor baby...

i want these bois to learn some lessons, not just be... *stuck*

outside of/before becca? he spent all of his time self punishing. whether through addiction or picking fights he knew he wouldn't win. the boi *actually* wants the spanking. BAD. he will dom top, but it's reserved for those he *nothings*(the actual opposite of love not to be confused with hatred)/doesn't care about/is using and it's pretty clear which one he enjoys moar~<3 boi just wants to be held and cuddled<3<3<3

from homelander, he wants the fight and wants to get his ass beat (hence crazy blood smile when he's hit GOOD), and homie? doesn't quite want to lose butcher with how... *unique* he happens to be

so where does that leave homie?

well... homie is billy's temptation to~ be like his father at nuclear levels. ultimate punishment. satisfying his addiction for violence and pain and chaos. and~ ultimate death wish *cough*scorched urf*cough*

billy is a bit opposite from lex in that he doesn't really want to control homie to protect himself... he wants to *unleash the beast* to *destroy* himself just as much as destroy homie. his ace? being the biggest manipulative smarmy bastard known to man, and highly intelligent.

billy is pretty much the ultimate *dangerous* bossy bottom because he has no self control. he spends 1000% of his time trying to take down that fucker while homie... does mostly jack shit. it's remarkable but when you boil it down, homelander's *capabilities* get hyped up (and nerfed down simultaneously, wtf) but he actually has pretty remarkable self control despite his situation.

3 on 1 and ONLY a fucking BRUISE--

their dynamic becomes so intricate because it's almost like homelander is *order* in a body meant for chaos while billy is *chaos* in a body meant for order... with the added danger of people--mainly billy--chipping at any sense of *order* homelander could have left... and throw in the ironic twist of billy *craving* order while homie *craves* chaos (possibly confusing and hectic, i know)

if billy could say what lex could (above)? homelander's *not* superman. there is no limit to what he'd do for billy if that crusty ass burnt marshmallow boi made him fall in love. they would *actually* set the world on fire and watch it burn... realistically lmao

they are either the WORST thing for each other or the BEST thing, and that dynamic properly set up...? oooohhh.... ;)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

but anywho~<3 homelander is not the gentle dom. he is the dark~<3 service top... he's *good* at following orders because it's what he was *made* for. but he is *also intelligent* and *frustrated* with his situation. it's what leaves him so fascinated with billy/not just killing him off. not only is this guy new and different and unafraid... there's a part in homelander that senses that this guy will obliterate whatever chains are left on him so that he can finally be *free*. and what that means, well? i suppose it's a to be seen sorta deal lol

the *correct* way the butchlander? of course, a real leash can always be used<3 but i prefer the more powerful, figurative and subtly sensual~<3 leash tying the 'top's *heart* to the palm of the 'bottom's hand... or that golden bussy<3<3<3 (in butcher's case, stands for 'butcher pussy'<3)

because *that* (golden pussy/bussy got the boi whipped) is another concept stolen from top 10 incels greatest FEARS and i say, don't let them fuck~

KIDDING... sorta. it is hilariously fun to stick it to the red pill ideaology tho, #feminism

but eventually~ their hearts and crotches end up lining up with the added bonus of super protective top<3 (as it should be<3<3<3) and what they can *learn* from one another/their stories. for butcher, it's self control. for homelander, it's what it means to *truly* be free<3 and jebus, it makes me cry but *that* is what can drive this ship from 'nice'/'guilty pleasure'... to *truly fucking incredible*<3<3<3 dark or light ;)

or, y'know. just go by who has better willem dafoe energy~<3<3<3 (def homelander lmao)

the art piece i'm working on myself wasn't somethin' i wanted to reveal too much on but weeeellll... for you~?

but it basically has homie railing *ahem* a pregnant~<3 billy... who has that dog on a tight leash and is pulling him closer<3<3<3

feel free to steal, add or subtract elements for any ship really<3 ;))))))) and of course...?

keep exploring/experimenting at *your* leisure. do what feels right for *you*, even if i'm not a fan, i'm one butthead on the interwebs. and you have every right to be *you*<3 ;)

and uh, if you got this far... WOOO~<3!! thanks for comin' to my ted talk, lmao<3

did i fucking forget something?? maybe, still got shit to catch up on tho--

billy's one easy slip away from falling onto homelander's vibrating super dick and i am here for it.

you know for a fact that boi let that cunt slap him around for fun and pain kinks if billy wasn't dreamin' cause homie's a trained super assassin and butchy's strength and speed don't actually compare how he'd like, the poor baby!

3 on 1 and all they managed was a goddamn bruise I swear. maeve actually managed something but homie didn't want to kill her. but i bet he'd be glad to have butchy's raking nails over his back and following orders to go harder like a good boi

homie has complexes. but BUTCHY has COMPLEXES. plus he's a canon subby sweetie for those he loves~<3<3<3!!

you do you boo, don't let anyone tell ya different. ;))))))))))))

but yessssssssssssssssssssss.

bossy bottom butcher with devious service top homie is the BEST and i fully support that endeavor~<3

😳😳😳😳😳😳😳 I'm taking notes- 📝

Hell yeah Sgsgsgsggsshshsh thank you for sharing your thoughts.

I'm definitely revisiting these later, I find your fantasies inspiring 💫 I love it here.

[thestaffoffice]

staffs-secret-blog had “no fucking clue”…. Maybe you can prove your superiority by answering the following riddle with your great staff wisdom:

What is the secret of getting reblogs instead of just likes? After years on this black hole of a site, I have yet to understand.

Far be it from me to contest Staffs-Secret-Blog’s authority on the matter. Additionally they are superior in Fakeness to this account in every way. I will not seek to prove or disprove them in this post because I happen to like them and their stuff quite a fair bit. @staffs-secret-blog if you see this, you’re awesome.

Anyway, Staffs-Secret-Blog obviously felt that it is unnecessary to explain how this website works to someone who says they’ve been here for years. If you have been here for years then surely you’d have cracked the code by now. Then again, very few of us have truly “cracked the code” so to speak. Thing about Tumblr is that there’s no code to crack. No code to speak of, at all. Nothing to crack. Cannot emphasize this enough. But anyway. There is a possibility that you have in fact been here for years without interacting much and now you’re discovering the results of that. If you’ve not really ever made original posts before this point, without also reblogging a ton of stuff yourself, you will find having an audience difficult.

So I’ll try and explain.

Veterans of this website understand that there is no guaranteed method for attracting a spike in reblogs…. if that’s what you’re after. There is only one thing that is guaranteed in this godforsaken dried up cowboy town and that is blood, sweat and tears.

As I said before in a different way: The goal of this site is not fame or attention (I say this rather ironically as a fake staff blog, trust me, I do see the irony), but rather to circulate and perpetuate the chaos on this hellsite (derogatory).

That being said. You do have options. Which are as follows:

You could straight up lie outrageously (which is hilarious and effective). Make up shit for your posts. People will either buy it or instantly know you’re playing around and either way it’s funny. (I’m thinking of @everythingispirates’s recent lie about the Pirates of the Caribbean gay divorce. Epic. Respect to you @everythingispirates, if you see this, I choked on my coffee when I saw your post, you fucking legend).

Post in a way that is either strange and chaotic or just generally magnetic and charming and utterly yourself. You may get noticed. You may not. Some people (I’m thinking of @firefox-official and @kristina100000 and @pukicho in particular. You three give me life, lmao <3) have done an excellent job of this. Being yourself in what you project doesn’t guarantee a following, but it does guarantee your own authenticity and sincerity, which is always an attractive quality anyhow.

Use well known meme sentences and phrases and repurpose them for your nefarious needs. This is done by many people on tumblr. if you don’t know what I’m talking about i can’t help you . Sorry. It’s a dog eat dog world. I don’t give more advice than this

Make memes based on current events or new media content, and post them. Idk. *slaps the table* BUT DO IT

Keep your posts either to 1 sentence, 2 sentences, a short paragraph, or a fucking massive essay. Short formats typically work better but then again, there are posts out there (do you love the color of the sky, for example, or the full script of the bee movie) that are known for their unusual length, so this is not a general rule

Rickrolling is always a good idea. Here’s a great example of a post that does it well here

Make a themed account with themed posts and tag the posts for that niche and that niche only. That works well for people and will attract an audience that you can relate to. Maybe. This is totally based on chance lmfao.

Actually. Tag your posts appropriately in general if you can (which often fails completely, bc sometimes a post with two (2) tags will blow up and sometimes a post with dozens of tags will fail completely). avoid tagging the wrong things because sometimes this can be truly upsetting to people

Use fucking Tumblr blaze if you can afford it. @horse-at-law is an excellent example of how to use the sponsor function correctly. THIS LAWYER ^^^^ KNOWS WHAT THEY’RE TALKING NEIGHING ABOUT BTW. 11/10 RECOMMEND

Sell your soul to the devil

Become a gif making account for various fandoms idk

Pretend to be an official account for a social media app (cough) I love all you @staffs-secret-blog @official-twitter @officialstaff @firefox-official chaotic individuals

Pretend to be a bot account (like the “I love you” bot or the “haiku” bot). Which not only will cause people to block you because you look like a bot, but it will also strike fear into the hearts of beings everywhere. Alpha move. Do it, I dare you

Post pictures of cats, chickens, dogs or dinosaurs with unrelated captions. Or no captions. And completely unrelated tags. You’re not trying to make this easy for people you’re trying to make it FUN IMPOSSIBLE

Join an active fandom you like and make content for the fandom. Besides you’ll meet people which is always cool.

Very very rarely, and only in situations where it is appropriate, use the devastating move called Kung pow penis. Don’t overuse this weapon. It can cause mass destruction.

In general just fucking post a photo of something random with an equally random caption and just see what happens. For science

Beg the staff to give us back the crabs

Post the lyrics to a song and see if anyone replies. Idk it’s probably just a shout into the void but worth a try

Occasionally use the “Get Drinked” move. Effective way of ending a reblog chain.

If all else fails, make a Superwholock post and see who rises from the depths

Good luck.

All this should show you that there is not ONE method.

And it should demonstrate that most of it is bullshit.

And that it’s mostly down to chance.

But reblogs are key to the health of the Tumblr ecosystem so your question was worth answering in this case.

The best way to get reblogs and likes is to reblog and like things yourself. You won’t get reblogs just by making your own shit exclusively. Also idk how many reblogs you’re looking for. But whether it’s 2 or 200, it pays to be nice and it pays to be generous. No one on this site gives a fuck about being famous. They just like the vibes. If your vibes are good, people will notice. That’s what matters, mate.

Ciao,

— The Staff Office

[prof-peach]

if fans wanted to include peach in stuff they write, would that be okay? and how would they write peach's personality? aside from "FIGHT ME" anyway, i think that much is a given lol. i only really write the anime characters 'cause that's what i know, but it sounds like it'd be kinda fun to try making a version of ash that fits into this blog's universe! nerf'd Obviously, but i think she'd probably appreciate how hands-on he gets when training his pokemon!

Ok, I get a lot of these messages, and I often hear folks wanting to throw peach into their stories and comics and writings, and I will always simply ask that if it’s published online publicly, to be linked to it so I can snoop and enjoy the content too. If someone asks about her in your work, let them know about the blog I guess? But literally I love that people take this stuff, these characters and stories, and make new stuff with it. No ones making money off my work here? So where’s the issue? Go for it buddy, knock yourself out, I’m all for it.

For you, and all the others out there who want to add peach, and other characters to your world building, I will give you a detailed rundown of the main lot, and how they behave, what they do, how they function. You can use that, use bits, or use none of it, I do not mind at all. If you’re creating something, you’re in control, not me.

So, peach doesn’t actually fight people as much as you’d think. She’s very aware most cannot and do not want to do that, and so she likes to keep to herself with regards to that aspect of her life, she doesn’t ask to spar with people, or even bring it up at all, but people ask her all the time, even if they clearly would lose or become hurt should she miscalculate during the fight. She looks at people like they usually create problems, and often has a somewhat reserved nature to other humans. You have to work quite hard to get anything more than formalities out of her. She will dead-pan handle people with blunt and very to-the-point statements, aid whenever possible, but very quickly get back to handling the Pokemon she so carefully tends. Her focus is clear, she’s all about hard work, her very small select family, and the Pokemon.

Her brutal, loud and brash personality only comes out with friends, family, difficult humans, OR any Pokemon. She will joke and laugh and play with Pokemon, but clam up around humans, maintaining tight body language and generally will be a little cold by regular standards. She does however have some weaknesses in this emotionless shield she puts up. When peach was young she was always angry, which swung so fast to sadness, back and forth. Her teenage years it just got worse and worse, it was crippling at points. She is to this day, full of fire and rage, even sadness, but now she has learnt to control it, to use it. When she sees that in others, it’s familiar, and she is pushed to drop the front, and be very real with the person. Underdogs I suppose, people who get bad reps, but deserve the same as everyone else. She can’t ignore it.

Once you start to pry open her personality, you’ll find she’s a lot more laid back and fun than originally appeared, you just have to work hard to find that side of her. She will meme reference, can’t dance to save her life, loves her coffee, and can be caught in quiet contemplation while gardening. This hobby is her calmest, and often is why she can stay so level headed when her quiet rage boils up again. Without time outside she will become grouchy, a little snippy, and lethargic. Will not go in the ocean for any reason other than life or death, is fine with ponds and rivers, or water at wading height. Likes the rain.

With regards to her training others, they usually have to tolerate her somewhat strict nature. She is a little....unforgiving, holds a grudge if you make a lot of mistakes, and has no tolerance for ignorance in the age of information that we all live in. In previous posts I’ve mentioned she’s only recently selected two students, after many years of testing kids who want to learn from her. Hundred tried out, only two have ever been approved. How she teaches is very fast paced, be prepared to get some scrapes and bruises, she will test your physical and emotional tolerances with intense tasks, carefully watching students like a hawk. Bad posture in your stance? She’ll be the first to tell you to sort it out. Not hearing your Pokemon partner? Right, now you spend the day without using words trying to communicate, let’s see how you like not being listened to.

This is a woman who has spent her life saying very little, and watching everything, she watches Pokemon and can see an issue from a mile off, and in battles, her observations are why she can react fast, and chose effective strategy to avoid damage and achieve results. Don’t let her body fool you, her strongest asset is analysing, watching, planning. Those skills have over the years transferred to people too. As a student, mistakes don’t go unnoticed with this professor.

Her methods are harsh but fair, and should you prove yourself, she will protect you with her life.

Because of her disinterest in kids and lots of noise, she does pass the training of students on to the other staff members whenever possible. Grey takes on the lions share of battle lessons, he is far calmer, more open and friendly, with patience for people, and an empathy that peach sometimes struggles to have. When you go through a lot of harsh training, and difficult events, it’s hard to change how you feel or think, with peach, well, she’s been through it. Most do not come out the other end in one piece, but she did, and it made her strong. You may think I mean strong like buff and big, and yeah sure she is, but I mean it mentally more than anything. Peach will not quit. She has learnt to destroy the boundaries that stop people getting hurt, gone is the fear that freezes you in your tracks, that feeling that you’ll pass out if you go one more step. She’s learnt to ignore it.

This means she’s a little forgetful at how it is to be normal, to be vulnerable and soft and squishy like students so usually are.

She has her issues, but for the most part, visitors get a laugh, a smile, a calm assertive confidence, and facts. She will indulge those who have genuine interest, or show a connection with nature, an understanding of the balance that needs to be struck for everyone to live well together.

Despite her many flaws, she’s fiercely protective, and will go above and beyond to defend the island, it’s staff, the Pokemon and the visitors. Injustice is her biggest gripe, along with littering, and she doesn’t stand by quietly if something happens that seems unfair.

You will not see her without Valka, her vulpix, close by. That Pokemon doesn’t like to be touched by strangers, at all, and will run the second someone comes at her with that intent. Peach will scold you for pushing yourself onto her, should you persistently try to get close to pet Val. They are in sync, if peach is sad, Val is sad, if Val is stressed, peach is stressed, and so on. They are inherently connected, it’s just been that long, the psychic bridge between them has been built, and reinforced over the years.

The only other Pokemon who follows her so endlessly is Booker, a teddiursa who’s pretty rough looking. He quietly trots behind, grouchy and stoic, they fight closely together a lot. He lost his mom a long time ago to poachers, and peach took him in, and changed her whole life for him. Not many people know, but Booker was the reason she left the rangers, changed career, and got so strong. Will tolerate people petting him but isn’t keen at all, grumbles a lot and tries to move away.

You may also need to know about the others, for the sake of writing, she here a few more bits that may be important to you, or others wanting to do this.

Grey is very tall, very burly, composed, tells bad dad jokes, is a bit of a goof if allowed to be. If he sees a pun, he’ll say it. Can’t help himself. Very nice guy to work with, good at keeping people calm and grounded. Pokemon are drawn to him like a moth to a flame, he gives off warm energy, and has inhuman amounts of patience. If you wrong his family however, he will snap back.

He grew up in the city, loves to swim and hike and cycle, can snowboard, is really sporty. A total brain box with held items, and boosting stats. He will explore many paths, to make sure visitors and students get the information they need, in a way that can be remembered and retained for later. Is a huge guy, but will get on the floor to play with a tiny Pokemon. Treats big “meaner” looking species like babies, very good with all pokemon.

His free time is spent either tinkering, swimming, or trimming his bonsai trees. This guy stares at screens a lot, so appreciates time away from them. Peach built him his own little greenhouse for his trees and tools, which he keeps clean and loves dearly.

His methods as a teacher are built around fun and games, he makes hard work easier to do by distracting trainers from the difficult bits, and focusing in on something more interesting or compelling.

His most commonly seen Pokemon would be a houndoom, Saxon, old battle veteran, retired now to herding and being a good boy. Very gentle, loves a pet.

Pari, now a fully fledged nurse, often oversees the labs front desk and pokecentre features, such as healing pokemon, and informing trainers who come to visit. Her skills with eggs and hatchlings is high, she’s great with younger Pokemon, and hands out good advice to trainers a lot. She’s not a fighter, never was, but can find any file, any study, any book, and any refrence you may need. A true bookworm, loves her romance novels, chat shows and upbeat celebrity gossip mags. Will cry at a lot of stuff, be it sad or happy.

She’s got a seriously upbeat personality, but if caught off guard or shocked, she gets a little flustered. Too much chaos will overwhelm her, but usually she’s on top of things. The years spent on the island have made her better at maintaining composure in emergencies. With lots of siblings, she’s very competent with others, and has a good ability to disarm cagey people with her jolly nature. Because of this, she can sometimes gain information from trainers that some of the more harsh professors may not have access to. Charming is a word for it.

Her partners are an eevee, and a happiny. They are quite sweet and well adjusted, the eevee gets a bit bouncy if you get it too excited.

[arcane-nari]

why are you trying to make nari evil she's the only good one in the arcane order?

(re: this post I’m assuming)

sorry anon you've unlocked my trap card. now i can draw infodumping from my hand and place it face up on the board

tl;dr: Nari isn't evil -- but neither is the arcane order. It's just that nari is the only one of the three who isn't okay with the suffering that would be caused by doing her job of maintaining the balance.

from what i can tell, the order's morality isn't Good or Evil in Tales of Arcadia: Wizards. (I do not see Rise of the Titans. I am not looking.) i've had this blog since wizards first came out, so my interpretation of nari is largely from there, with only some points here and there taken from Nari.

(aside: i feel so vindicated with how she acted in the police station. this bug is feral and i love her)

they're antagonists for sure, and they're rivals, but their morality isn't good. Instead, it's sort of more focussed on the good of the balance between magic and mortals and keeping that in check. there isn't much explanation as to what that means in canon, but I think it's sort of a chaos vs order thing -- too much of one and the world explodes. too much of the other and it's rendered inert.

before the battle of killahead, while each demigod has their own personality, they seem to be of the same mind when it comes to the end goal: protect the balance, no matter how many mortals get hurt along the way. (Mortals, in this case, meaning anyone who is not a primordial wizard.) It's a matter of good of the many (the balance) vs the goods of the few or the one (mortals).

Coupled with their duty to the balance, i have the interpretation that they're simply too disconnected from the world of mortals to understand what pain is -- skrael and bellroc moreso than nari, which i'll get to in a minute. But they're so powerful and ancient that it's easy for them to feel Apart from the mortals, because of how short their lives are and how small their magic is in comparison. Kind of like how most humans view squirrels -- they're creatures living their own lives and having their own drama, but, ultimately, we are far more advanced.

to continue the metaphor -- the world at the time of killahead is something along the lines of a tree that's overgrown the sidewalk and is causing problems, in my mind. Yes, squirrels have made their home in it, but it's causing too much trouble to the humans living in the area, so it has to be cut down. It's not done to cause direct harm to the squirrels. it's just that the action of cutting down the tree will cause direct or indirect harm to the squirrels.

(I've used this metaphor way too often with the order lol)

So they aren't remaking the world because they hate humans specifically. Most definitions of evil is someone who wants explicitly to do other's harm. In my mind, the order doesn't want explicitly to do people harm. They don't care about people. Well -- they don't like them, and perhaps they aren't happy about the amount of people who will die when they remake the world, but it's certainly more than justifiable in their mind considering the ends they're pursuing.

And that takes me to pain. Nari explicitly says she can sense all souls, but it's not clear whether she can sense their pain and suffering. Rather, she seems to be right on board with the order's methods all the way up until she sees Killahead directly. Once she sees the pain -- once it becomes real for her -- she can't dismiss it as a necessary evil that comes with keeping the balance in line. She can't depersonalize it or separate herself from it.

Sure, she's able to occasionally Look into the aether and see souls winking out here and there due to the destruction being caused, but it's different from seeing it up close. And she realizes what they're doing has real and tangible effects and she can't do her duty anymore. It's not that remaking the world is wrong. It's not that the demigods are misguided.

"It's not worth it."

Those are nari's words when she realizes what they've done. The cost is too high. They can't move forward.

I think, were this turned around and the order were to be shown as the protagonists, nari would be written to be a coward. It's all about doing your duty until you face the consequences of your actions, and you can't keep your word. Instead of trying to stop things, she runs. She hides. for nine centuries, she spends her life hidden in a castle away from the world.

We don't see what she does, but I think she learns. I think she asks questions and learns how people work, and how trolls work. I think, once she has the chance to be up close and personal to living people -- even if it's just galahad for the majority of the time -- she falls in love with them. it's hard not to. The way they change and grow and create. The idea of constellations is as much a wonder to her now as it had been the first time she heard about it.

And her desire to protect mortals grow with it. The more she learns, the more her heart becomes entangled with the very world she once wanted to remake. To hell with her orders and her duty -- she's doing what she thinks is right.

By hiding. By doing nothing. We see in Rott that it's probably the only thing for it, considering mind control, but i'm iffy on whether that's something that's canon for me or not. It feels a bit too convenient, considering we've seen such massive power on her end.

She's ancient, but she learns in a few short years what it means to have friends. Her love for humanity is what separates her from the order but, on an objective level, that doesn't make her good, or even Not Evil. Ultimately, it's a human thing to label her as good because her intentions align with protecting us, rather than protecting this vague, enigmatic concept of The Balance that we get so little understanding about. Maybe if we as an audience got more, we would understand why it mattered enough to destroy the entire world to repair it, but we don't, so it's easier to side with the tangible "protect humans at all costs" goal over the intangible "repair the balance at all costs" goal

And the order cares about each other. The way nari teases bellroc and skrael, the way bellroc snaps at skrael -- it feels like a band of siblings. It feels like a family. There's more to them than evil. (And rott did a disservice by trying to make them such. Even at the end, bellroc showed empathy. They could have killed jim when they were certain of their victory, but they told him to go to his family. There's a heart in there, however much it may be of blackened stone.)

(But that's another story entirely.)

There's stories about the fair folk that come to mind, with their strange morals and rules. A lot of stories paint these fairies as evil because their punishments seemed harsher than what humans would expect for certain infractions, while their games often included things that hurt humans. But it's not because they wanted to hurt humans directly. (Okay, a lot of them did, but many of them didn't). It's that what they consider good and bad is so far removed from humanity, because they are not and have never been human. They're simply existing alongside them in the same world.

In conclusion, the order isn't evil. But because their goals don't include the welfare of humans, it's easy to label them as such - and because nari's goals ultimately were protecting humanity, it's easy to label her as good. But the order themselves are too far removed from humanity for me, personally, to label them in terms of explicit morals.

Nari is kind. She is clever, and she's capable of learning, and she's curious. She is herself -- but if we call her good, that's on us, whatever comes of it. She may be capable of change, but she is only ever herself, whatever shape that takes

also veggie lady good character and i love her. grey morality and all.

[potteresque-ire]

Not sure if this has circulated before, but here’s a link to Henry Jenkin’s reactions to 227, largely as responses to an interview he did with Sanlian Lifeweek magazine (三聯生活周刊), a publication modelled after TIME magazine and published under China Press Publishing group (中國出版集團), the largest and state-owned publisher in China. The magazine asked for Jenkin’s opinions on the fandom-related aspects of 227 back in March, 2020. Henry Jenkins, as many may already know, is among the most renowned scholars of (Western) fan culture ... if not the most renowned.

Personally, I find this article to be quite limited in perspective, because 227 had a significant non-fandom-oriented, sociopolitical component ~ and hence its scope, its chaos, its damage. IMO, 227 stopped being a fan war, stopped being about solos, cpfs, and even Gg the moment AO3 was shut down ~ the powerful Chinese state had intervened, and the incident necessarily became a political incident. That One Fic on AO3, the conflict between solos and cpfs about whether and where That Fic should exist was at most a lighter left at the scene of what would become the blaze; it wasn’t even responsible for igniting the first fire. Most i-turtles (i-fruits?) are probably aware too at this point: if fan wars are sufficient to start 227, then there wouldn’t have been a 227 ~ because 227 would have been every date of the year.

Fan culture is fundamentally transgressive, and what that means can only be defined in the context of the subculture’s “mainstream” sociopolitical and cultural environment. I therefore find the article’s attempt to transplant Western fan culture’s observations / theories / analysis / conclusions to the incident without explicitly comparing, addressing in depth the differences of the pre- and post-transplant environment to be ... prone to rejections (as organs are after transplantations!)—exclusion from being useful or valid. And this article was very short on such comparisons or address. Jenkins being a fandom expert aside (and he was careful about not treading outside his area of expertise), early “antis” of 227 presented themselves as crusaders for the freedom of speech and, by late March when this article was published, the heated debates surrounding the incident on Chinese social media had already led to embarrassment for multiple powerful state publications. It was probably a wise choice to not make another dive into the political aspects of the incident.

Being a new(-ish) turtle who joined the fandom a full half-year after 227, I’ve been backtracking, trying to really understand the incident, which remains very much beyond comprehension in many aspects. The discussions I’ve dug up that have most fascinated me have been those in non-fandom spaces, by non-fandomers / politics enthusiasts who barely knew who Gg was, who didn’t know That One Fic involved more than one idol and had zero knowledge about solos vs cpfs. In these discussions, “antis” are not referred to as “antis” because while the action of the so-called “227 coalition” was to kill Gg’s career, that wasn’t considered its ultimate goal ~ its ultimate goal was to warn whoever tried to clamp down the freedom of expression that their opposition was strong enough, populous to fight back and take away whatever, whoever those who attempted the clamp-down care the most about. In this case, “Gg fans”—I put this in quotes because eventually, no one would know who would lurk behind those pro-Gg Weibo IDs (and the anti-Gg ones as well)—were the perceived enemies of creative freedom. Gg, assumed to be the one, the symbol of what “GG fans” cared about the most, naturally became the target of the coalition.

Gg wasn’t special in that sense ~ and that was perhaps, the saddest thing I found about this incident as a Gg fan (without quotation marks); Gg could be any idol who achieved top fame at the moment, who had enough fans to make the point known. The coalition was therefore not “anti-Gg” in its ideological sense. It was anti the fan circle culture that had cemented Gg’s popularity, that had already been known to deal extremely poorly with dissent—complaints had been abound that c-ent was no longer fun for bystanders because the latter could issue no critique, not even doubt, about an idol without the fear of being reported, torn down by fans. The coalition eventually grew to include anti the many happenings, the many censorships and imprisonments in the past few years that had silenced the creative crowd in China, happenings people dared not speak about beyond a loud grumbling ...

The coalition tried to take down Gg, because they couldn’t take down the force that had shut down AO3, that was truly responsible for the silencing. They played the Hunger Games in the Weibo arena instead of challenging Who The Real Enemy Was, because some might not have given much thought about  The Enemy; some might have thought the Enemy too invincible to be worth the effort; some might have got too carried away by their blood thirst, the cruel schadenfreude of shredding a beautiful, successful young man into pieces, and forgot why they were there in the first place ... 

And that was only the political side of 227. 227 was also widely suspected to have a commercial component, which added another layer to the symbolism behind Gg the Idol ~ pretty much as soon as 227 happened, netizens investigated, tried to uncover the chain of capital behind Gg. With the scent of money was the memory of filth associated with it, in a country not exactly  unknown for its corrupt business practices. Much like in The Book of Exodus in the Bible, the Idol is believed to be forged with gold; it is ungodly, tainted. Whether Gg the Person was identical to Gg the Idol, Gg the Symbol mattered to few. That Gg *was* a person seemed lost to many ... 

I’ll have to dive into the non-fandom aspects of 227 with more rigour. As much as I'd love to leave 227 behind, every time I see Gg, I see its legacy on his face, in his smile, and perhaps, I’m not the only one ~ ADLAD cast him as Patient #5 because of 227′s effect on him. Put it another way, 227 is already modifying, writing Gg’s career trajectory ~ a trajectory that is undoubtedly under scrutiny by many who wish to duplicate his success but circumvent his pain. And every time I see a young idol—Gg, Dd, and anyone else—I wonder if the hurt of 227 can happen to them (again) because the crux of the incident has never been resolved; the oppression and silencing have remained strong as ever. 

Anyway (sorry for the rant) ... what I found noteworthy about this article was the quotes the magazine highlighted in its published form (in Chinese), which weren’t highlighted by Jenkins on his own website. They reflected what the magazine would like to be the take-home messages of the interview. I’ve listed them below; all of which had Jenkins as the speaker:

[Pie Note: About Real Person Fiction (RPF) in Western fandoms]

“American fans often do have some shared norms about what is and is not appropriate to write, mostly having to do with protecting the privacy of other people in the star’s life. Writing about the star is seen as fair game; writing about their family members is not.”

---

[Pie Note: About GG being “cast” as a transgender woman in The One Fic that started the incident; gender in fandom]

“We write fan fiction as a form of speculation and exploration. For some people, it may be one of the few spaces in the culture where they can express who they are, what they are feeling, what they are desiring. And for others, it is a place of “what if” where they explore in fantasy things they would not necessarily desire in reality.” 

---

[Pie Note: Whether GG should be held responsible for his fans’ behaviour]

“Under these circumstances, I would not hold a performer responsible for his fans’ behaviors but the performer is responsible for their own behavior and fans may respond negatively to performers who over-react to the existence of alternative fantasies and insult or hector their audiences.”    

---

[Pie Note: About AO3 and why fans were so upset about its closure] “Keep in mind that AO3 is a particular kind of platform. Alongside Wikipedia, AO3 is one of the greatest accomplishments of participatory culture in the digital era.”

---

[Pie Note: About the “problematic” content on AO3]

“Among my findings were that fan fiction sites can be a valuable space for young people to acquire skills (and receive feedback) on their writing from more experienced writers who share these same passions ... That said, while teens have participated in fandom, a large part of those on AO3 are adults, engaging in adult conversations on adult topics.”

---

[Pie Note: About media text in the new media era]

“First, I would stress the proliferation of media texts at the current moment ... We have access to a much broader range of media content than ever before and in this context, fans play a constructive role in curating that content, helping some shows get greater visibility ...  Second, these texts have become more malleable”

---

[Pie Note: About idols not producing “good” media texts]

“Rather, the question should be what are fans finding meaningful about these performers and the texts they generate. I start from the premise that human beings do not engage in meaningless activities. I may not immediately recognize why something is meaningful but my job as a scholar is to understand why cultural materials are meaningful to the people who cherish them.”

---

My understanding of this selection of quotes is this: this state publication (as others) was quite ready to forgive Gg, to put this incident behind. It could choose to not publish this interview; it could choose to leave out certain quotes, or not do the highlighting that cast both AO3 and Gg in a positive / innocent light. But it did all these things. This article furthers my impression that the state never intended 227 to blow up the way it did, and that it did—enough for stories about it to be found in non-China websites, and in English—was what I’m still trying to comprehend. 227 was, admittedly, how I was first introduced to Gg beyond Wei Wuxian. And as I got to know Gg, like Gg, my want to understand 227 only becomes stronger, perhaps because only through comprehension I feel I can find peace for the GG fan (again, without quotation marks) in me.

Maybe I should email Dr Jenkins and ask if he’s looking for a PhD candidate. 5 years of research and thinking ... maybe that’s what it’ll take. 

I feel I’ve already started anyway. 

[pynkhues]

.... any succession fic recs? 👀

Yes!! I haven't read a lot for it yet, but some of the stuff I've read has been staggeringly good. I'm generally more into gen fic in this particular fandom, but have enjoyed some Stewy x Kendall, Gerri x Roman and Naomi x Tabitha too.

A few recs under the cut!

“I wanted to get out. From under all this. Take the money and run.”

Kendall tells Stewy even though he knows he’ll never get it, not like Naomi does. He’ll never understand the crush of it, the heart-stopping head-fucking fear of failing a tyrant. Kendall’s been ignoring the shape of it for a long time, putting pieces of it together in the back of his mind in total darkness like a blindfolded man. It doesn’t matter that one day his dad will die. It doesn’t matter about the money or the hostile takeover or the stolen files or any of it. There’s no running. Kendall’s Logan Roy lives inside his head.

Stewy laughs. Stewy laughs for a long time.

“There is no out, Ken, what the fuck are you talking about? You were born this and you’ll die this. You are what you are, and what you are is a fucking Roy.”

Kendall hates him, for a moment. Lightning-strike furious. What the fuck does he know about any of it, about his dad’s swinging dinner plate-sized hands, about getting 24% name recognition in reliable international polling, about puking every time you think about a car swerving off the road in the rain. About finding out that you can do something unthinkably, unimaginably terrible, and it doesn’t matter to anyone you know but you. There’s a scar on his arm that no one else who hasn’t already been told how it got there can ever know about, and he’s sick of it, and it’s not fair. He hates Stewy for a moment because Stewy’s right.

“I wanted to do the right thing, Stewy, for once in my fucking life.”

Stewy laughs again, more briefly, and the predator flash of his eyes in the neon of the motel sign is a torture all its own.

‘There is no right and wrong, Ken. How the fuck do you not know that yet? Not for people like you. Like us. There’s shit you get caught doing and there’s shit you don’t.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about. You really, really fucking don’t,” says Ken, and fuck, there it is. The road less travelled, that only he has ever driven on. The path he’s down where Stewy can’t follow. That place beyond Stewy Hosseini where he never thought he could go.

“You’re not telling me something, and when I find out what that is, and I will find out what it is, Kendall, don’t you think I won’t, so I am warning you that when I do find out I am going to be righteously fucking pissed,” says Stewy, and if Kendall thought those were a predator’s eyes before—

“Yeah, you will,” says Kendall, because he knows exactly how perceptive Stewy is. Exactly how weak he is. Exactly, precisely what both of them are.

And treat this night like it’ll happen again by postcardmystery. 8k words. Kendall x Stewy. Post s2. (CW: internalised homophobia, some homophobic language)

I tried to pick a shorter excerpt, but I literally couldn’t, this fic is so. good. The voices are pitch perfect, and it’s got this incredible build to it overall that goes back and forth between time and point of views and just rips your heart out. The premise itself is pretty simple – after the press conference at the end of 2.10, Kendall calls Stewy, and they drive through rural America while Kendall has a breakdown, and it’s just - - unspeakably good. I love it so so so much, I have no words.

r/roysucks Connor’s gf just posted on Instagram (instagram.com) submitted two months ago by webbedscrum_2279 23 comments share save hide report

[–] DM_ME_SAMESMAIL 40 points two months ago I too like to escape to my yacht in the Mediterranean when my family and I are on trial for covering up rape and murder. permalink embed save report reply

AITA for accusing my father of multiple crimes on his own news station? By amleth 3k words. Gen fic. Post s2.

And now for something completely different – epistolary fic which is just reddit news threads of the Roy family drama. I love an epistolary fic and this is just totally charming, and made me laugh a lot out loud.

“You’re quiet,” she observes. “That’s a first.”

“Yeah, well, the Turks beat it out of me. Gave you a run for their money.” He waggles his eyebrows. “So what is this? Whips and chains? Are we doing the whole boat-sex thing? I heard Shiv and Tom are looking for a third —“

Gerri finds what she’s looking for: a black leather binder. She drops it on the bed and begins paging through it, and Roman cranes his neck enough to recognize that it’s just full of documents, not like, dick pics. “I’ve given some thought to what you proposed a few weeks ago, and I agree that we should make things official in some way,” she says, and he blinks.

“Uh,” he says. “Which — what part of it?”

“Take a look.”

Gerri closes the folio and hands it over. It’s deceptively heavy, and the print on these pages is way too fucking fine, he thinks, paging through it. “Is this some kind of, like, Fifty Shades of Roy sex contract? Because it’s not that I’m not into it, but I think there’s a strong argument for going paperless —”

“Strictly speaking, this isn’t legally binding,” Gerri says. “Just something I threw together with regard to our business arrangement going forward. But with no respect to the family — the past few weeks have really illustrated that no one should take anyone at their word right now. Give me a little more than your word.”

Evacuation strategies for a yacht on fire by devourthemoon. 11k words. Gerri x Roman. Post s2. Explicit.

After the events of s2, Roman and Gerri fake being married as a professional alliance, only, y’know, maybe it’s not so fake. This fic is just so, so much fun, and messy in the best possible way. The author nails all the character voices, and the sex scenes are just the right amount of hot and ridiculous, and I just love it all a lot too.

Kendall estimates it will take an hour for the first articles to go up. Some rapid-fire blog without oversight—the New York Post, maybe, or wherever those Vaulter hippies have skulked off to—will slap a catchy headline on it and report his words verbatim. Give or take a gif of his face when he switches to script number two. New York Times, Washington Post, AP, those fuckers take longer. They like to bleed the story like Middle Ages plague doctors for its marrow, fact-check and add context and analysis and as many backlinks as their servers can handle. Still, a couple of hours, and his face will be plastered on every major news outlet. His voice will play over the nightly talk shows. He’ll trend on Twitter. A few more days, and he’ll be the star of analysis segments, podcasts, weekly briefings. Maybe, fuck it, maybe he’ll trend on Twitter again.

It’s been years since Kendall read Shakespeare. But that shit sticks with you, gets under your skin and emerges when you least expect it, like eczema or Keynesian economics. He knows how the media will spin this. Kendall Roy Attacks CEO Logan for Years of Corruption. Prodigal Son Disrupts Family Legacy to Restore Credibility. That’s how Hamlet ends, right? And Macbeth, Lear, Othello, Romeo and Juliet, even Titus fucking Andronicus. The spilled blood sinks into the ground, the seedlings sprout forth from the soil, and a new castle is built on the bones. Order out of chaos, or at least close enough an approximation that the tabloids will buy it.

Legacy for profit by owlinaminor Post-2.10. Kendall Roy. Kendall through Shakespeare analogies – just - - ooooof. It's a beautiful, lyrical character study that weaves through Roy family history and teases at a future none of them are even sure they want. It's gorgeous writing.

For the next few days Shiv would have to keep the pressure on Kira like an open wound because there were other women, victims that Nate’s people were going to find one by one as soon as that phone call disconnected. Mo was her father’s friend, good friend, for a long, long time. Nate and Gil, Sandy and Stewy, too many sharks in the water and the share price probably dipped to a new low but she would never check a stock ticker. Her husband’s nerves fraying at the edges on national television. She had promised a woman she’d never met before that she would kill roughly one third of the top male executives of her family’s company. Her company.

The last look Rhea gave her before she shut the car door was concern close to fear—no longer the same woman who heard their pitch in the safe room, who laughed with her at Argestes. Rhea had only looked into the abyss; she got cold feet and she didn’t even know what it’s like to grow up in it.

Her family’s company is hers, will be hers. Even from a whale fall, new life would spring.

Feed his flesh to wayward daughters by reogulus. 2k words. Shiv Roy. Set during 2.09.

This entire fic is set around Shiv bribing Kira not to testify, and god, it is so good. It’s bleak and rough, and really hones in on the complex ground Shiv walks as a character. It's another brilliant study of what it takes to be a Roy, and the way they make the awful choices in order to fulfill this legacy that they don't even know they want.

Kendall sets down his fork. “So. Tell me. Is it everything you wanted? Is it what you thought it would be?”

Roman stills. He never does that. He’s constantly a menace in motion, slouching and fidgeting, worse even than Kendall at his amphetamine peak. “What? The view from the tippy-tippy-top?”

“His regard.” Kendall wipes his mouth with the edge of the white cloth napkin. It comes away pink from the steak. “Dad. He’s all yours now.”

Roman still hasn’t moved. Finally, he lurches, like corroded machinery come uncertainly to life. “Yeah, man. It’s fucking tight as hell. I love every beautiful daddy and me moment I was a good enough little boy to earn.” He snorts. “Fuck you.” His face goes curiously slack then, like something Kendall’s own face would do. An intermission in the performance, an energy cut. Something genuine finding its way to the surface. “Why don’t you tell me. When you got everything you wanted, how the fuck did that make you feel?”

Nauseous, is the first word that springs to mind. Sick. Scared. I’ve never had everything I wanted, there’s that. I’ve never once had a single fucking thing I wanted. There’s that, too.

Interim leadership by arbitrarily 2k words. Roman + Kendall. Post s2.

I love Roman and Kendall scenes generally, but this one which features Kendall and Roman meeting for the first time a few months after the press conference in 2.10 is just a bit magic. The push pull dynamic that's just inherent to them mixed with the genuine affection and brotherly love is really special, and arbitrarily embraces both in equal measure. It's a great little fic.

There are lots more of course, and I'd also recommend checking out other works by these authors, but I hope this is a good place to start! :-)

[chaos-monkeyy]

Tagged by @frankthesnek and @a-storm-of-roses like a million years ago whoops 🙈 Thank you!!

-

nickname: chaos (i.. probably actually respond better to that than my 'real' name at this point skjdfhdkf)

zodiac: none thank you

height: 174 cm / 5'8.5"

last movie I saw: ...dammit, I literally just watched it over the weekend, which one was it-- OH YEAH Tucker and Dale vs Evil 🤣🤣 best comedy horror in the fucking world. Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine are just excellent in it, I wind up crying from laughing so hard every damn time I watch it.

I probably shouldn't put a gif BUT I'M GONNA

last thing I googled: ...well the last two were for this ask - "tucker and dale vs evil" because I'm bad with names and could only remember Alan Tudyk's 🙈, and 174cm in inches - but right before that was "mobius villain gif" (and I FOUND the one I wanted!!)

favourite musician: Paul McKenzie/The Real McKenzies

song stuck in my head: death bed (coffee for your head) - powfu & beabadoobee (don't ask me why, it's not my usual tastes and it makes me sad)

blogs following: 92

amount of sleep: not enough

lucky number: I don't have a lucky number, but my favourite number is 10

what am I wearing: ...green/khaki cargo shorts, my black bob's burgers pride tshirt, and a plaid flannel shirt whale shush 🤣

dream job: writer, of the paid variety

dream trip: one where I don't get any bug bites 😂😭

languages: English, French, a smattering of German, and I still remember a couple random words from te reo Māori

favourite food: [skipping this one because it's all things I can't eat anymore 😒 *sulks*]

play an instrument: ...oh god, okay FINE, I played the euphonium (baritone) in high school and fucking hated it 😆

favourite song: too many to choooose, it always depends on my mood 😩 I guess I've been listening to Rx by Theory of a Deadman a fair bit recently, but I dunno if it's a *favourite*. If I could only listen to one song for the rest of my life maybe The Tempest by The Real McKenzies?

random fact: ...I legitimately don't understand why anyone visits Disneyworld/land ever, it sounds like a nightmare

describe yourself as aesthetic things: !!?? that's hard, what 🤣 uhhmmm.... chains, well-worn leather, crunchy autumn leaves, a campfire, and a book that's been read so often it's falling to pieces and the page corners are all soft and rounded. does that count? pls tell me that counts, I have no idea what I'm doing here

-

I have nooo idea who's been tagged lately so uhh @wantonwhale @revakah @notebookishtype @luredin @carsonsweebabyturtles @dedkake @grand-admiral-lawn and anyone else, if you want to! (also please tell me if anyone wants me to stop tagging you in stuff 🙈)

[goldenchan-fx2thepeacock]

Don’t Go Running Off Into Danger, Even If I Do pt 3

Hek. I woke up today and found that my FNP phic has 41 notes and my DGROIDEIID phic is gaining attention and reblogs; holy shit. And I woke up at noon. It’s Saturday. I sleep in on such days. Anyways. Last I checked, Val and Danny were gonna go get Dani, but we need some Dip and Mabs action cause I forgot last night. I will probably develop an uploading schedule later. For now, just have random updates. I might even make a side blog for this shit.

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Chapter 3

Dipper stood off in the background as Danny got into an argument with a dracula ghost. By the amount of times he heard Plasmius, this must’ve been Vlad. Danny looked pissed when he finished. He still took Dipper and Mabel to their classes, but when they tried to find him at lunch, he was absent.  “I wonder where he is?” Mabel pondered.  “I’m sure he just had something to do,” Dipper replied. Some guy walked up to their table.  “Hey, you’re the kids Fenton is touring. Listen, he’s Phantom and I have proof!”  “And you are?” Mabel said patiently. “Wes Weston. Listen, you gotta believe me!” “We legit just moved here, we have no clue what you’re talking about. Leave us alone,” Dipper said. Wes looked taken aback.  “Fine! Fenton better worry. I will expose him. I just need more proof,” Wes stalked off. Dipper and Mabel exchanged a look.  “Should we be worried?” He asked Mabel. “He seems to have it under control,” 

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Danny stared off into the daylight as they flew. Val set down.  “Come on. She’s fine. Why are you losing it?” “Just a certain Wisconsin Ghost told me about you keeping her,” “Vlad?” “Wait, you know?” “I’ve known since I met Dani,” “Jeez. I’ve known since I met the guy during my parents college reunion. I’m still pissed at him for that whole invisble wall fiasco,” “That was him?” “Yeah. I mean, I started it, but he kept trying to get in my mom’s pants. I needed to put him down a peg,” “You made his wall invisble!?” “Yeah. But it’s not like being naked on camera is going to tell the public any secrets,” “I’m confused. Why do care so much?” “It’s nothing,” Danny grunted. They were headed to the basement. “It seems to be something,” “I have things I’d prefer not to reveal to the entire school,” “No one saw your dick. You managed to catch it in time,” Val was confused. Danny laughed.  “Hey Val. Why would a guy have a female clone? Oh right. I forgot to tell you. Dani is more or less my clone because Vlad was being extra creepy,” “Weird. So she isn’t your cousin. Wait. OH MY GOD! Danny, I understand completely. If Dash knew, you’d be dead meat,” Val caught on quickly. Danny couldn’t but laugh at the dead meat. “Hey! What’s funny?” “I am dead meat Val!” “I’m an idiot. Anyways, we’re here,” She opened the basement door. Dani was sitting on the couch.  “Danny? Val? What’re you guys doing here. Shit, sorry Danny,” “It’s fine. She knows,”  “Who else knows anyways?” Val said.  “You, Jazz, Tucker, Sam and literally all the ghosts,” “Vlad included?” “Vlad included,” “And Amity Park can’t connect the dots?” “No one knows Danny Phantom has a human life. I’d be seriously pissed if someone told the general public,” “That’s fair. Anyways. We’re here because a certain Dracula cosplayer told Danny you were in danger,” Val said. Danny snorted. “Dracula cosplayer? I have to use that on him,” “Why would anyone think that’s a good look?”  “My ‘dad’,” Dani said. Thus causing both her and Danny to break out in laughter. “Where does the whole cousin thing come in?” Val asked. “My ‘Unkie Vlad’. It’s his way of making me family,” “Unkie?” Val looked lost. “I like being a little bitch to him,” “He deserves it! You should expose him,” “If I expose Plasmius, Masters exposes Phantom,” “Oh jeez,” “And there is a very good reason not to expose Phantom. And they wear way too much white,” Dani said quietly.  “I’d prefer not to get dissected,” Danny said haughtily. “They already want to,” Val made a noise of disgust.  “How could anyone with a set of morals do that?” “Heh. I’m a ghost. Not really real to most of the world. I don’t have feelings. Don’t feel pain,” Danny repeated what the ghost hunters had told him way too many times.  “That sounds awful, but we should get back to school. Cya Dani!” Val waved and put on her helmet.  “Hey, wanna leave the quick way?” “What do you mea- AAAAAAAH!” Val screamed as Danny made them both go intangible and up through the roof. “Never. Do that again,” “Hey, at least you didn’t end up going through the table and random floors and get banned from handling anything fragile,” “I’m confused,” “When these powers first came in, I was stuck dropping everything. From my pants to beakers,” “Oh jeez. So, why aren’t nerd and nerdette with you?” “Tucker had to go see a doctor out of town and Sam’s mom took her to this convention thing. They’ll be back tomorrow,”  “No comment on the nicknames?” “They’ve been called worse,” Danny shrugged. “And I’ve been shoved in way too many lockers to care,” “I have one last question. Why on earth would you try to date me when I was trying to kill you? And why did you destroy the suit when I could’ve been inside?” “That’s two questions. But Fenton and Phantom needed a distinction, and I knew you weren’t inside. Technus was controlling the suit,” “You are a mystery,” “I’d like to keep it that way,” “You won’t tell anyone my secret if I don’t tell anyone both of yours?” “That makes it sound like you’re going to tell one of them,” “That’s not what I meant,” “We need to come up with an excuse as to why The Red Huntress suddenly has a truce with Phantom,” “Later. I need coffee,” “I couldn’t agree more,” The plume of blue air showed up. “OH COME ON!” “What,” “I have to deal with something,” Danny sped off. 

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Dipper and Mabel looked at the chaos in the caf.  “Students! Hide under tables! Ghost Hunters and/or Phantom will be here soon,” Mr Lancer yelled into a megaphone. “Already here!” Someone yelled. A flash of white said Phantom. There was blue ghost throwing boxes around.  “I am the BOX GHOST!” It yelled. “Yeah, we know. Just say it already,” “I will win this fight with boxes of... spoons! BEWARE!” “Don’t you know not to bring a spoon to a knife fight?” “You do not have a knife!” “No, but I do have a thermos!” Phantom pulled out a green and grey thermos and flipped the lid.  “I will not stay in your cylindrical object!”  “Looks like you’re gonna have to,” Phantom pressed a button and a beam of light came out of the thermos and sucked the Box Ghost inside. “Is everyone okay?” Kids pushed out from under the tables.  “Phantom! Will you sign my book?” Dash said. This must be a cruel joke.  “Ghost boy! The Fenton Peeler is back in action,” “Whoops, gotta go!” Phantom dashed off as Jack and Maddie Fenton came rushing in. “Darn it. Missed him again,” They ran off. Danny walked into the caf and ran over to them. “You guys are lucky that your first ghost attack was the Box Ghost. Harmless,” “Doesn’t look very harmless to me! That’s gotta’ve been at least a level 5,” Dipper opened the journal. “Nah. Box is a solid 2. Hardly a step up from an ectopus. Might get concerned if Desiree shows up. She’s a level 5,” “What’re you?” “We more or less tested it. Pretty sure I’m a 7,” “That means they aren’t a big concern to you most days,” “Mmm. King Pariah was a level 10. That was terrifying. Vlad’s an 8. Convinced he’s a 9,”  “Okay,” “Skulker gets to be a 6 on a technicality. Without the suit, he’s a 1. He can be an 8 on a bad day. I think Frostbite is a 9. He won’t bother you guys though. Dan must’ve been a 9, but I’m not going into that. Technus is an 8, but can be a 10 if he gets his hands on the right tech. Clockwork is an 11, which technically doesn’t exsist, but Clockwork breaks the mold. He won’t bother you unless you end up destroying the world in the future,” Danny shivered.  “Who’s Dan?” Mabel looked confused.  “Nobody. Just a horrible way to learn not to cheat on tests,” Danny shivered again. “But that’s not important. I didn’t cheat on the CAT,” “Your life seems more hectic than Gravity Falls sometimes,” Dipper said. “Where is that? I’ve never heard of it,” “Oregan. Never Mind All That,” He knew the rules. “You know, the way you say that is kinda creepy,” “We’d be breaking the law if we told you why,”  “Jesus. Well, it’s not like we’ll get another Pariah unless an idiot thinks it’s a good idea. He’ll never get his hands on the crown of Fire,”  “Time Out,” Dipper and Mabel looked around.  “Umm, CW, why aren’t they out with everyone else?” “They’ve met Cipher. At this point, I cannot pause time for them,”  “Eh, whatever. Mason, Mabel, this is Clockwork. What’d you need?” “I actually came to speak to you about the Crown of Fire. In defeating Pariah, you gained ownership,” “I, uh, did what now?”  “Gained ownership of the Crown. Though in your case, it would be the Crown of Ice,” Clockwork repeated. Danny looked lost.  “I don’t need to be the King of the Ghost Zone,” “Someone must take the place. It’s your duty,” Danny looked like he was about to have a full on panic attack.  “Can it wait?” “Two years is a long wait as is,” “B-but it went thousands of years before!” “Because they failed to remove the crown and it wasn’t a singular person,”  “What’s two years in the Ghost Zone? As far as I’m concerned, that doesn’t seem like a long time. Walker was gonna give me a thousand year prison sentence,”  “You get some time, but I’ll tell you, if you take the crown, the Ghost Zone enters an era of peace unprecedented,”  “Danny, what’s happening,” Mabel asked. Danny snapped and started hyperventilating.  “I can’t. No. Why? I just wanted to keep the world safe! Is that too much to ask?” “Daniel, you do get time to think about it. Just remember, time can pass however fast or slow I want it too,” “Right, of course. Cya CW,”  “Time In,”

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Danny trudged home. Exhaustion and anxiety gripped him. Mason and Mabel had been concerned, but he wasn’t about to explain everything. He’d talk to Sam and Tucker tomorrow. It didn’t help that he’d had gym after lunch. At least there wasn’t any more disappearing walls.  “Danny! How was school?” Mom asked as he walked in the door.  “Great!” Danny said and rushed upstairs. He’d deal with The Box Ghost in a minute. Jazz stood in his doorway. She didn’t know about Dan, but she did know about Pariah. “Danny, is everything okay?” “No, everything is not okay!” “What happened? Is it Dash again? We should report him,” “It’s not just that. You remember the Pariah incident?” “Yeah, you don’t just forget that,” “Well, turns out that by beating him, I ‘gained ownership’ to the crown,” “That doesn’t sound bad exactly,” “It’s horrible!”  “How?” “I just wanna be a kid, ya know? It’s hard enough living a double life, but ruling the Ghost Zone? I’d have no chance to do anything remotely useful in the human world,” “You wouldn’t need to. If you ruled the Ghost Zone, ghosts wouldn’t come here anymore,” “The King can’t enforce rules in the Human World. It’s just scary,” 

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Aight, that’s a chapter, I guess. The ideas tend to come from random places, and my brain is running out of ideas. I need to do another “planning session” which is coming up with scenarios in my head to make sure they make sense.

[stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland]

Lauren’s Attunement/// The Catharsis of the Dark Diary (Long ass post)

Ah ... I really don't know how much I could say about this Attunement that I decided to separate into two parts and notice that I am going to deviate a bit from my original intention to make some clear points because there is a lot to get out of what Lauren has said. With that in mind I hope it is not too confusing to read.

First part: Cancellation Culture

I think our moonchild has been perfectly clear on this point. "We are living in a very sick world" "In a world in great need of healing and that will not do so through the culture of cancellation." Cancellation culture sucks, folks. A twisted idea of ​​exposing things from the past of people who have not been good and that people have become accustomed to criticizing as if all those who criticize were a mirror of virtue and perfection when nobody is perfect and Lauren also mentions that in your Attunement. Lauren also mentions that we cannot hold people accountable for their mistakes because it is the most important part of the process. And it is a truth like a cathedral. People who make mistakes need to take responsibility for their actions so that they don't make them again. It is necessary to learn from it and improve as people and heal. In the part where Lauren mentions that she would never publicly embarrass the people she loves, she reminded me of Camila. I did not want to mention Camila in this because we know that Lauren has also been humiliated but if we talk about the cancellation culture that part goes to Camila. Camila has been a victim of the culture of cancellation long before leaving the band and they have made Twitter threads, blaming her with a racist past for which she has apologized many times but still drag her to hell, no matter what. Camila has haters who love to fuck her and Lauren knows it too. She has known it forever and a clear example is (I'm not going to put a screenshot because it would distract me) the tweet where someone calls Camila ugly and Lauren responds to that hater saying: "Hello, can you show me a picture of you? " It is these details that make us understand that everything she sees on the internet in relation to her and her loved ones affects her a lot and what she says when she talks about the online world where we are all the time, is bullshit. She says that it's not that you can't do what makes you beautiful, that she's fine with it, but also the people who are watching don't know that shit is fake and that people aren't happy with who they are. "That when they look in the mirror they don't love themselves." And I think she hit the spot there too, folks. She has perfectly outlined a hater's profile. The lack of love of those people who have found an escape route to their frustrations, to what is wrong with their lives, that makes them what they are. Because as she says, we live in a screwed up world, it's true but the point is, how the hell have we got to this point? How do we get to this point where the human being has lost humanity and has become shadows of hatred and rejection that lives by making Twitter threads and canceling people to feel better about themselves? And then Lauren talks about Trump. She mentions Trump as a symptom of lack of love. And again she is not wrong. Donald Trump's life was never very happy. With an authoritarian father who always preferred his eldest son to follow the legacy of his family and perpetuate the name of it, when this son did not want that pressure, the father banished the eldest son and all the shit fell on Trump. The only other male in the family. Trump is that man's mirror. From that egomaniac, controlling, arrogant, undoubtedly macho and racist father because he has really shown it. Trump lives on appearances. To demonstrate something that is not and to hide its shortcomings in a marked narcissism.

Another thing that strikes me about what she has said and another truth is also that we no longer love each other because we do not know where we are standing. And that is also true, we do not know who we are because others dictate who we are. They dictate what to say, what to eat, what music to listen to, what television series to watch until we become cattle. We have lost our ability as individual beings to fit the mold of livestock just to give us the feeling of feeling connected, as if we were part of something. Part of a whole that is still controlled. From this part Lauren begins to talk about what she has written in her diary so I will continue with the second part, but to close this one, I can only say that many of the things she mentions are a reflection of what we are doing living, of what we are suffering and our own fragility as a human species.

Second part: Black Diary and Amy's Shadow

I think we have a concept of great artists as broken human beings, wrapped in dramas and additions that actually "help" perfectly in their art. Where, the more chaos there is in their lives, the more geniuses they become. And I think Amy can be an example of that. And talking about her, because I'm going to start by talking about her and then I'm going to express my thoughts about Lauren. I remember responding to an ask yesterday saying that I was terrified when Lauren said she felt identified with her because their lives were a kind of parallel. And then I thought better of it and realized that yes, both lives have that parallel but with a difference, Lauren has what Amy never had. An emotional support network. Good friends. Amy's life was marked by rejection, mockery, the circus that was her life where her art was in the background and her voice was shattered to make way for the addicted, alcoholic Amy, where her greatest achievement was to climb to a drugged and drunk stage, with glasses of wine that she drank live and her show was to demonstrate her weakness so that others made fun of her. Her parents perpetuated that shit because it gave them money, and as long as she made money, at the cost of her own physical and mental health, nothing else mattered. Being an artist is not only knowing how to sing, dance, write, paint and be good at all kinds of artistic expression, but it is much more than that. Being an artist is breaking yourself into pieces and giving them to your fans to do with those pieces what they want. It is giving more than what nobody will give you in return. And Amy got broken. They broke her into thousands of pieces and they all jumped like vultures wanting a piece of her until she ceased to exist because they never gave her a chance to rebuild herself. They never gave her a chance to learn to love herself to be able to heal because they didn't want a healthy Amy because that didn't sell. They were only served by her pain because she filled their bank accounts, those of her friends, those of her managers, those of the entertainment tabloids. Those of her boyfriends. The ones from her own fucking parents. And so far we can draw parallels with Lauren. It is possible that our moonchild has had or is having her problems with her mother, or with her record label, or with whatever she is having problems and is dealing with right now, but at least she does not have a family that just supports her and is there for the money she may or may not earn. And yes, she mentioned many fears at first before reading the newspaper, but at least she has had a chance to regroup when she needs to. Lauren has the ability to heal herself, her own will thanks to her own strength. Because even if you are afraid of breaking or feeling pain, you have to feel it. You have to hit rock bottom to learn how to get out of there. You have to go to the extreme of falling enough to know that your own will, your own inner strength is so great that it helps you to rise not only once, but a thousand times if necessary. And she has that ability. I believe and have always said it, you already know it. That the real problem, or part of it, is not Lauren's fragility because that is bullshit. Lauren is a strong girl but at the same time she has this angel, this kind of kindness that really does not go well in an environment as rotten and toxic as the industry. Lauren Jauregui does not fit molds. She cannot follow rules if she considers that they are not fair and that people in the industry do not like because they lose their ability to manipulate it. There is a reason that her song Toy has disappeared, folks. Lauren is still an artist and of course she too falls into the concept of what it means to be an artist, breaking herself into pieces and giving those pieces to us who are her fans. And since we have a piece of it, perhaps we create ourselves with the right to demand more from her because we are not satisfied with what she gives us and we criticize her for it. The worst fans are capable of fucking her and haters are able to write Twitter threads exposing what they hate about her.

That would scare anyone, folks. Even if you are not an artist. There is a Lauren Gif that I posted on the blog as part of a set of images related to Camren. In that gif Lauren looks at the audience with such a raw expression on her face saying something like: "You who are there screaming like crazy, with your perfect lives while I am being pressured to the point of breaking and you just want more" (I put the only screenshot because I don't have the GiF image at hand)

This GiF is something that always caught my attention and since I have known Lauren she knew that there was something else with her. I met her as the bad girl, the bitch one. That image that appeared to conform to Tyren. And then her smile disappeared. I remember when I joined the fandom where one of my first posts about PR circuses was to ask myself: Why do girls look so fucked up? Why is Lauren so sad or why has her smile disappeared? And then there were those weird videos where she seemed like "haunted", like outside of herself and that agreed with the time that she had to stunt for Tyren and always seemed to be the same dynamic with her. And then it was not only me who realized that Lauren was not well, but also other mutuals and we kept repeating the same thing to the bastards on her team: "Lauren is not well, please take care of her " That was something that we repeated a thousand times with Lauren and then also with Camila because it always caught my attention that the two of them were equally fucked at the same time. Before I knew that Lauren had her problems with her family, I also noticed that separation. I think I received a bit of shit after expressing my thoughts but in the end, I was never wrong because Lauren herself has expressed it and I think if I had been in the fandom long before 2018 I would have noticed it too. This has been a very emotional Attunement on Lauren's part and I told her in a tweet, as her fan has been a privilege to have witnessed that. It is a privilege to be a fan of a girl with a huge heart who has flaws that make her more human than other people and who has grown enough to know that she can continue to do so. With this post I have tried to be respectful and say that, although I do not know her, we connect in a special way because we have almost the same way of thinking in many aspects (although I do not agree in many others) and I think that still does most important to me. About the newspaper. It reminded me of the lost diary topic, but apparently she has more than one. Who knows. I remember my period of having diaries in my teens and I appreciate that because it made me realize that writing would be an important part of my life. If there is one way I am good at expressing myself it is writing, and no, not in English so I apologize for the mistakes. There is one last detail of Lauren's Attunement that goes a bit more on the personal side. When she says: "To be a real one, is to be an emotional one". I have always had a conflict with being emotional. Starting with my zodiac sign (yes, I know it's a bit silly to believe in that but it amuses me). As a Pisces, I am an emotional being. As a physically disabled person I have my limitations and although these limitations do not define me, I have always had a fierce fight with my vulnerable side. I hate depending on others, physically and emotionally. I also hate getting sick and others having to take care of me when I'm unable to do it on my own, that's why I don't get along with my emotional side. Excessively emotional and I prefer to be more cerebral in many aspects (I think you have noticed that my favorite word this year has been brainless people, right) and dependency is something that I can't stand on myself. That they depend on me does not matter, I am always for those who need me but being dependent is something I tend to avoid like pests. Relying on others to do things for you, depending on the affection of other people ... my family (except my mother) was never very affectionate to say, it was not impulsively hugging you or public displays of affection and I learned to be the same . But I also learned to give what others did not give me. And it cost me. That of leaving the mold of a family that is there and that sometimes worries but that others can leave you and not know what you are doing on any given day. A family that demands expectations. At least some of my uncles. I think that in that part I feel identified with Lauren and it is curious because I am adopted but she is not. And still I feel identified with Lauren and at the same time with Camila and the relationship that she has with her mother, which is almost an exact copy of the relationship that I had with my mother throughout my childhood and adolescence. I guess that's why I follow them both, apart from because I love the music of both. The last detail and I already stop talking about me because this post is about Lauren. What she talks about the industry, the molds, how female artists within the industry are treated. That was also an important aspect because here we are, always complaining about the fact that female artists are undervalued and punished twice as much as a male artist because the music industry is misogynous and macho. That's true.

Society tends to forgive the mistakes of male artists who sometimes do more reprehensible things than female artists and all the mistakes of those female artists (Leigh-Ann of LM throwing shade at Camila) come to light more times and they are more hated. That is a part of the industry that I have always hated and that makes me sad at the same time because it always affects our girls. And I don't know what else I have left to say that I haven't already said, I hope I wasn't too confused with my ideas but it was something I had to write about and I've taken my time to do that. I don't know if Lauren is ever going to read this, but I wanted to thank her. Thanks moonchild. Thank you for giving us that piece of you that makes you vulnerable so that we know it. Thank you for being yourself, for teaching us that we can heal and continue to grow. Thank you for that beautiful mind of yours that has so much to express and deliver to this screwed up world. Don't stop being real, mija. Don't let that light you have go out. I love you so much moonchild ...

sorry for the long reading, folks but it was something I needed to said.

[mego42]

I 100% agree about wanting more fanfic lists! I honestly think it's the best way to get a variety. Everybody has personal preferences, if someone, who mostly reads long, fluffy au Brio fic, is making recs, they're not likely to mention short, angsty, canon Brio (which is understandable and fair!) so ideally someone else, who does like those, would also do recs. I'm pretty sure I've read or at least tried the vast majority of Brio fics, but the recs often make me re-read the fic and author.

YAAASSSS!!! I mean like, okay, I v much get why people have issues with rec lists, and I def do not by any stretch endorse the idea that recs/rec lists should be considered anything other than one person sharing a think they liked, but to me a lot of the issues (the same fics/authors getting recced, feeling like awesome fics/authors are going unrecognized) can be solved by more reccing, not less. everyone’s got different taste and different stuff they look/read for and I am extremely pro sharing that.

Idk, I think about it like this: in a previous internet life I was a YA book blogger and I lived and died by recs from other bloggers whose taste and preferences I knew. I mean, you know, I’d check out a book bc the premise sounded interesting but literally the first thing I would do was go to Goodreads and look for a handful of people who tended to like the same books I did and see what they were saying about it bc that was the best way to get a good idea of if I wanted to give it a shot. Or, on the flip side, there were some people whose reviews I followed bc I knew we v much did not read for the same things so if they hated a book for X, Y and Z reasons, I was probs going to like it (one thing about book blogging is if you want to keep current, you do not have a lot of time to mess around, snap judgements are key but that’s a whole other thing and idk if it’s even relevant anymore bc that landscape has changed so much). 

ANYWAY, the point is, I got in the habit and now I do the same thing with fic bc, tbh, I don’t have a ton of time to read, esp not when I’m actively writing which, with the exception of the last week or two, I’ve been doing p non-stop since I got here. All of which to say is, I am desperately in favor of fic recs for purely selfish reasons, I need them! Give them to me!!! Please!!!!!

That said, I uh, am v bad at returning the favor and I recognize that (I think I’ve made what? two rec lists for this fandom?) so I will try to do better to live by my own, idek what this is, moving on and here are 10 recs not really thematically linked by anything other than I’ve read them and loved them and don’t think I’ve put any of them on one of my rec lists yet (and if I have, my blog is a trainwreck I cannot be expected to remember what’s on it LET ME LIVE):

The Goodest Boy by EnsignDisaster

There’s a key turning in the lock and Buddy rushes over to greet his Master excited for her to meet his new friends. The door opens and he dances around Master’s feet rejoicing on the fact that she’s made it home. It's been literally forever.

“Hey Buddy what’s wrong? Need to go potty? Need to pee-pee?”

“Nah he’s good we took him out.”

Master does something very unMasterlike, she drops all the food she’d brought in on the ground and screams. It’s a non traditional avant garde type of hello…Buddy loves it. Mostly because while Master taps furiously on her small light box and sits tense in the corner opposite his new friend Buddy can lick up the egg smashed on the hardwood floor.

Buddy! The! Dog! POV! no further explanation necessary. Technically WIP, but it covers the whole pilot in a way that could be read as standalone (THOUGH THAT WOULD V MUCH GIVE ME A SAD though, when did the show forget the Bolands had a dog? so maybe that’s a tragic casualty of canon, idk)

May The Moon’s Silvery Beams by @pynkhues

Emma hums in agreement, and Rio turns her around to sit her on the counter, grabbing one of the older looking boxes of muesli while she kicks her legs out, heels bumping back against the counter, watching him. He gropes around the inside of the box, finally just opting to pull the plastic cereal bag out and peering inside. He can’t quite keep the grin off his face when he sees the wad of cash lining the bottom. This woman kills him, she really does.

Then there’s a little face peering up beside him, trying to peek into the box.

“What is it?” she asks, and he tilts the box sideways so she can see inside.

The upside to not getting here until s3 is that old fic is new to me! Huzzah!! Idk how many of y’all have already read this on but if you haven’t I highkey recommend. Extremely cute take on what if Emma woke up when Rio and came by to collect his/Beth’s/whoever's money during the shutdown. Cannot believe I’m reccing kidfic. Witchcraft!!!!!!

Maybe You’re My Fantasy by ohmisterjapan

He fucking loves the involuntary. It speaks to how he likes to unlock chaos and walk away. He's been called a control freak before and it felt like such a misunderstanding of him - he's all about self control but he doesn't want to control others. It's more that he enjoys revealing to them how little they can control themselves. It's more that he likes to stand still in the eye of someone else's storm and pick coldly through the wreckage.

Another oldie but a goodie. This fic is more like an extended character study (first chapter Rio POV, second chapter Beth) and I LIVE FOR THIS KIND OF SHIT. I really really really love the take on both characters, it really digs in and pulls out some nuances that made me sit and think about my own read of them and I love it.

A Shock Of Blue by mintletters16

“You don’t look very well. Would you… like me to get you a glass of water or something?”

Her voice is low but smooth, laced with a softness that cuts straight though to his core. Strawberry blonde locks fall gently just above the pair of magnets freezing him in place.

He can still feel the chaos tearing through his veins - emanating from the gold plated gun stuffed in his waistband - and suddenly he can’t be here anymore. Can’t meet this wide-eyed gaze that’s been locked on his for the past God-knows-how-long anymore.

Can’t see blue alive and concerned when he just left it cold and void somewhere in oblivion.

She’s looking at him like he’s on the brink of madness. He thinks maybe he is.

Apparently, it’s backlist rec day over here and I’m not sorry. This one is another technical WIP but the chapter works as a standalone (BUT if the author decided to return to it I WOULD NOT BE MAD). It’s a what if Beth and Rio met pre-canon and it works so!!! well!!!! The tension and fascination and build are all *chef’s kiss* plus the writing is gorgeous and lyrical and ugh, I love it.

for a moment we were strangers by openhearts

“We got stuff,” Rio motions with a nod to the backpack Beth hadn’t noticed when they arrived hanging on the back of one of the chairs at the island.

She swallows and turns back to the dishes, realizing Rio apparently means to sleep there , assuming the place isn’t bugged.  Or for some kind of cover story if it is.  She turns and fixes Rio with a narrow-eyed stare, studying his face, the corner of his jaw especially prominent from the angle she’s looking up at him.  He’s methodical about drying each dish and setting it back on the rack, maddeningly ignoring her hard stare, so when he goes to take the next plate from her hands she grips it tightly and gets his attention.

“Hey.”

“What you on about now?” he asks, irritated.

It gets her gut uneasy, how he’s just . . . there, settling in, in ways he never had before, no matter how nonchalantly he would let himself in through her locked doors.  

“This is,” Beth tries, failing, to find words for it, “. . . it’s weird .”

This one takes place post 204 and Rio and Marcus end up spending a long weekend staying with Beth and Emma for reasons (that work, for the record, I’m just not trying to summarize rn) and it’s domestic and cute but honestly my fav part of it is how weirded out Beth is by how easily they slip into sync. The story does an excellent job balancing where they are in canon (uneasy post-sex truce) with a snapshot of what they could be if they got over themselves (HA! as if) and Beth is DEEPLY FREAKED which makes her slow slide into realizing she could maybe sort of kind of oh shit like it/him??? that much more satisfying.

Not So Careful by @bensonstablers

When he doesn’t answer, her eyes go to his but he’s too busy watching the letter opener which is still pressed against the back of his hand. Curiously, Beth runs it up his arm, careful not to press too hard, and smiles a little as he shivers. Pulling her leg up onto the bed, she shuffles closer to him before pressing the tip of the sword to his chest and slowly circling his left nipple with it, being sure not to get too close.

“You ain’t gotta be that careful.”

And when she lifts her eyes to meet his, he’s got that look. The one that always makes a lump form in her throat and for her to fall back into bed with him without a single thought of what they have to do that day. Only thing is, this time they’ve got nothing to do for the rest of the weekend and well, staying in bed the entire time had seemed like an appealing idea so she allows herself to give in a little to that look.

It makes me EXTREMELY SAD that knifeplay ranked so low on the kink survey so I’m gonna need y’all to check out this V V V EXCELLENT example of it and come back and tell me you’re sorry and you voted wrong. I am v reasonable what are you talking about.

love (where it wasn’t supposed to be) by @lilliloves

"You know what I can't stand?" Rio asks, stepping closer. It's a rhetorical question but he pauses for a second and watches Dean sniff, watches a bead of sweat trickle down his forehead, watches him shift on both his feet as he contemplates making a run for it.

"A guy who don’t realize how good he's got it." Rio continues, looking Dean up and down in disgust. "A guy that will literally fuck up a good thing just to get his dick wet."

"Yeah, well I can't stand a guy who can have anyone he wants but chooses the married woman he's not entitled to.” Dean shoots back. "And I really can't stand the fact that you're always in the room with us even when you aren't there."

And who brings him into the room Dean hmmmmm????? Jk, jk (or am I). In this one Rio catches Dean out on the town with another woman (bc of course he is) and tries to call him out but whoops! gets called out himself. I really love the like, idk, undercurrent of wistful regret in this fic. I love Dean straight up calling Rio out on his feelings (spoilers but there’s an exchange right after this one that made me straight up holler), and, you know, obvs I am here for Rio making Dean feel like an ass. 

Hell Is Other People by makemanybraver

Rio: We're in Hell, Elizabeth! If you don't think you belong here, then repent! Don't fuck everyone in the room in hopes that you get to go out!

Beth: Why do I have to repent?!

Rio: Because you did some fucked up shit in your life, Elizabeth! You keep doing fucked up shit here, too! And you think you don't belong here!

Beth [screaming at the top of her lungs]: Because I don't!

This fic is existentially bonkers and I love it. It’s the kind of experimental format/homage/what have you kind of thing that I L O V E. Based on No Exit by Jean-Paul Sartre, Beth, Rio, and Fitzpatrick are stuck together in a room in hell for all eternity. What more do you need, honestly.

Working On Things by odenkirk

Unknown Hold up, Elizabeth. I'm really thinkin about you here.

Beth turned her face into the pillow, effectively suffocating herself for a moment, but thinking it was a good trade off for the way the cool silk of her pillowcase chilled her skin.

She lifted her head to glance at the still sleeping Dean before replying.

Beth I'm thinking about you too. But this can't happen.

She wanted him to know she wanted him, but she also thought that admitting she was already there would save Rio from trying to convince her. She wanted him, but morals had to win just once in a while.

YES this is technically Beth/Dean while also being Beth/Rio BUT it’s also sort of Rio/Dean and I am HERE FOR THE DIVERSITY OF SHIPPING leave me alone who asked you.

Five Times He Knew What She Was Thinking, and One Time He Didn't by JoeyLee

Aight, so tell ‘em I was hittin’ it. Said deliberately blunt, eyes locked on her face the whole time, just to see those blue eyes widen. She looked so shocked that he almost laughed, so he softened it teasingly just to keep her going. Oh, I’m sorry, sweetheart, tell ‘em we were makin’ love.

Then he just watched her, just watched her face, just fucking fascinated. Her lips were parted and her eyes were big as saucers, and…there it was. Before she could look away flustered, he watched the thought go through her mind. Him and her together.

He wondered what she was picturing or where. Them in the back seat, her bed, a motel?  Her on top or him from behind or his face between her legs?

Whatever it was, the blush started immediately, and he watched it bloom out from her cheeks to her hair. Then she was tearing her eyes away to gulp a little.  But it didn’t knock her down for long before she was looking back. And then, wait, was she actually asking him how to go about telling a fed they were fucking?

Okay this is another technical WIP but works as a standalone. I am absolutely fucking feral for character POV takes of canon scenes and this is a supremely excellent take on Rio POV of some notable scenes from the pilot through 204. Imo it brilliantly captures Rio’s voice and I love it a lot. 

HEADS UP I am absolute shite at tracking ao3 to tumblr unless people have specifically told me someone’s ao3/tumblr name SO if you recognize any of the non-tumblr authors on please lmk so I can tag them and YES I recognize that I am asking y’all to do things for me throughout this entire post and I’M SORRY OKAY I’M A WHOLE ASS MESS LOVE YOU BYE

[starshine-selfships]

1, 10, 11, and 12 for the ask game ? 😺🙏💟

Hi hi hi!! You're getting long answers to these bc any excuse to talk about this man makes me go crazy stupid 🙌🙌🙌💕

1) What's a Hot Take you have about your f/o?

HE👏IS👏NEURODIVERGENT!! I'm specifically talking adhd, but he checks a lot of boxes for something more ambiguous too. I'm actually rewriting my adhd sh.aiapouf post and I'm gonna put it here too, but the cut time version IS: noticeable hyperfixations/special interests in music and the monarchy, practically no empathy + has difficulty understanding the emotions of others, fast thinking + thinks a LOT, almost weirdly analytical + book smart with little to no interpersonal skills, extreme emotions all over the board, like there's a LOT here and it explains like 80% of why he's Like That 😤

10) How did you feel when you realized "oh of course I had to like That Character"?

Okay I have a lot to say on this one djnfkffk please bear with me as I write a whole novel

✌U_U ✌

Honestly,, , I wasn't happy LMAOOO, around the time I watched the anime for the first time i was actually still pretty into j.jba and unfortunately was really into dio U_U

I was fascinated by pouf as soon as I saw him in the opening, lots of neat ant designs and then this butterfly man?? I need to know everything about him 👀 His intro with the rainbows in the wings, the fairy chimes, the solo violin, all had me like 👁👁 Sir I Am Going To Study You Like The Insect You Are, and then I saw him actually play the violin and was sold lmao. He was funny as far as comic relief went and then? The giant improv ballet breakdown and antagonistic turn drew me in further and then I was invested in a no going back sorta way as soon as he went chibi for the first time, just watching the chaos of the entire scene with this ridiculous huge grin dhjdkxkf every single thing he did was in the extremes and it was like watching a train de-rail in real time, I saw him face down in the dirt at the end of the arc and didn't even feel anything, he was just so WILD

So I finish h.xh not too long after that and texted a friend and was like hmmm. I need to watch j.jba to return to my roots and also to forget that I think I might've accidentally given myself a lil crush on the butterfly man 😳 idk if that return ever happened but I DO remember being frustrated with how pretty he is,, I didn't really wanna shift hyperfixations at the time and also didn't know if it was attraction or gender envy bc. what I would give to simultaneously look so fem and so masc 👁 either way it was a 3 month struggle of "oh no oh my god I wanna kiss a bug so bad?? 😞" and then I caved at midnight in a denny's and was like okay. fine. I'm gay for a bug, I really really like him but *i* don't have to like that 😤

I did, in fact, proceed to like it, enough to make an entire separate blog for him. It was a slow progression of "I mean, I'd share a ballroom dance with him, like a waltz maybe", "hmm okay he's funny but whatever", "oh uh. he uh. I mean he's neat, a lot of people didn't like him but I just think he's an interesting character 😳" and. and then I finally caved and I never stopped talking sjdkfkf though to be fair, I was already talking about him a LOT on my main, I just decided that maybe it would be nice to have a space to just. contain 90% of my poufposting LMAOOO

Final note on this, but I think what really got me is how many characters are in this series and yet I gravitated towards the one no one could stand 😞✌ though to be fair the hatred for him has definitely gone down compared to what I can remember from a few years ago; absolutely does not change the fact that He Is The Way He Is, but I saw the war crimes, malice, potentially treason, and I won't name it but it's by far the most uncomfortable thing to sit through in the arc, I saw ALL of that and still went hmmmm yes I want that one U_U true love huh

11) Do you think it's better to have copious amounts of content for your f/o, even with the risk of finding a lot of ship art, or better to have a lot less?

The art situation with him is strange bc there's a decent enough to be notable amount of art of him captioned with some variation of "I hated him but he had a really cool character design", but it's still content. Surprisingly, I actually don't track the tag for him but take a look at it anyways almost every day and there's maybe one new thing there like once a week, minimal content bc so many people just didn't like him, which is fair!! But also, he was definitely there as a prominent character, I'd just like to see more of him U_U I would put more art here but I'm too conscious of the art ops seeing my bs over here jdkdkfkk

There actually are a handful of ship art drawings of him, which astounds me bc this man wasn't there to make friends, not even with his own siblings :/, but the errant art of him with morel or kite is honestly pretty cute, please just let this man be happy, I love to see him smile 🥺

12) Aren't you tired of being nice? This is an excuse to rant.

He wasn't the worst guard!! All three had reasons for doing what they did and arguably, pouf's motives were the most complex. Yes he did some pretty awful things, but he considered them to be the right thing to do without a doubt in his mind, all his actions were selfish in that they were based off his own feelings, but he did things ultimately for the king, so his actions also had an edge of selflessness to them as well. He was just. so much more than annoying and while his character development wasn't positive, it was still some pretty astounding growth; as an antagonist, he's also fairly plausible 👀 sometimes people just are manipulative, sometimes feelings do get the better of you, pouf just has all those factors amped up to 11 at all times so they're magnified. I have. a lot of thoughts on him, he interests me very much 😞👀🤔👀