#which should either mean he now understands and sympathizes with Dick for how hard that was for him
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bigskydreaming · 5 years ago
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So obviously, like, I make a big deal out of Dick Grayson’s intentions when naming himself Robin in the first place, and how it was meant as an homage and tribute to his parents and the generations of Flying Graysons before them, and that’s a huge part of the reason he was so pissed when Bruce gave it away without consulting him and why its kinda messed up that everyone characterizes Tim as massively resenting Dick for making Damian Robin, etc, etc....
But okay, like....Dick Grayson was most other child heroes/sidekicks’ inspiration, not to mention Jason and Tim’s (though Tim of course was just as influenced by Jason’s turn as Robin, if not more).
And then, my problem is...whenever talk of inspirations and legacies and mantles and all that comes up, the question becomes - who inspired Dick in the first place?
Because, I mean....the answer isn’t Batman.
THAT’S why the origins of the Robin persona are so important, because like, Dick wasn’t inspired to become a hero, the KIND of hero he was, because of Bruce. He just wasn’t. He loves, respects and admires Bruce of course, sure, that’s a given. But one of the primary characterizations of Dick across ANY canon or medium is that he’s NEVER wanted to be Batman. He HATES it when he has to wear Bruce’s mantle. Not because he doesn’t respect it or what it stands for, but because its not him, and it never was.
THAT’S why he was never Batboy, never modeled himself as a younger version of his mentor like Kid Flash, Aqualad, Wonder Girl, Speedy, etc all did. Because he wanted to work with Bruce, sure, he wanted to be a hero like Bruce, as in a person who does heroic stuff and helps and protects people.....but not in the ways Bruce did it, and not for the reasons or with the intentions that Bruce had for his own costumed persona. Robin was specifically created to be everything Batman wasn’t, because Dick, being one of the many survivors of tragedies in Gotham who fell through the cracks and would have been left behind and swallowed up by the system if not for a hero’s intervention.....Dick was aware of how catching the bad guys and putting them away, seeing justice served, like, it was important, but it wasn’t THE most important thing. Not to everyone. 
Catching the bad guys only fixes a tiny part of what happened. It was Bruce’s solution to things - from the second the Graysons died, that was his answer, that was what he was sure was going to help Dick move on......but Bruce’s answer wasn’t Dick’s answer. Catching or killing Tony Zucco wasn’t ever going to help Dick heal or move on, because the murder of his parents was only PART of his personal tragedy. The other part was how it resulted in him being ripped away from everything he knew and everyone else he loved, never allowed to go back to the life he’d always intended to live, growing up performing and entertaining alongside his family, like all their family before them....instead forced to change basically everything about himself in order to fit into a structured life of routines he found boring and pointless and not remotely what he wanted out of life.
Robin was Dick’s answer to all that. Being Robin was the only thing that allowed Dick to heal, because it was the one and only way in which he got to take back a piece of control over his own life. If he couldn’t go back to his past, to the circus, to his family, then he’d bring all that into the present with him, carry it forward. Continue his family’s traditions in the only way he could think of now, fighting crime alongside Batman in the signature colors of the Flying Graysons, remaining true to that title by swinging from grappling lines rather than a trapeze....but still committed to the same work his family had made their livelihood for generations, the same work he’d always intended to continue in some form himself: making peoples’ lives better, just by his presence. 
Entertaining, performing, not out of insecurity or to cover things up, but because that was what he’s always seen himself as born to do. To leave people a little happier than they were when they first encountered them. Cheering up the victims of crimes with his jokes and laughter and brightness while Batman dourly scouted for clues and conferred with the police. Giving them a reason to smile even on what might have been the worst day of their lives, otherwise. Making jokes and puns while fighting the bad guys, his own way of pushing back against the darkness of Gotham - by laughing at villains of the day, by refusing to let someone like the Joker be the only one who had any reason to laugh in Gotham.
And not one bit of that came from Batman. Bruce didn’t inspire Robin, didn’t inspire Dick - Batman only gave Dick an example of how his past, his skills, his purpose in life could be adapted to allow him to continue on in the spirit of his family, to ensure they lived on through him, not just in body but in spirit as well. Zucco, the system, they could take the boy out of the circus, but he refused to let them take the circus out of him before he was damn good and ready. They could physically keep him away from a trapeze and out of the center ring of a circus, but no one was going to tell Dick Grayson when he was or wasn’t allowed to be a Flying Grayson, with everything that entailed.
Except....that’s exactly what Bruce ended up doing.
And that’s why I will always call that a greater betrayal than anything that happened with any of the Robins since, despite any of their (usually still quite valid) issues with how the mantle ended up passed on from them. Because Dick was no different from any other sidekick or child hero in that he built his identity as a hero around the heroes who inspired him to follow in their footsteps....its just that for him, those heroes were his parents. They were the ones Robin was trying to imitate, live up to, make proud. That’s why Dick always insisted on being called Bruce’s partner and not his sidekick. Sure, he absolutely loved being Bruce’s partner, but that doesn’t mean that ultimately that wasn’t just a means to an end for him....a way to ensure he was allowed to keep going out at night doing what he damn well intended to do anyway. He wanted to work WITH Bruce but he never wanted to BE Bruce. Because he already had a concrete vision of who he wanted to be like, who he wanted to be.
(And of course, this is also why I always get so annoyed with the take that Bruce didn’t bring up adopting Dick earlier in life because he didn’t want to replace his parents, he was trying to respect Dick’s feelings towards them, etc.....because uh.....that doesn’t really track, considering that co-opting the Robin identity and annexing it as part of the Batman identity, BRUCE’S to take and then dole out as he wished.....like, hello, dumbass, what did you think telling a kid that you were forbidding him from using HIS mother’s nickname, HIS family’s colors, etc, like....what the hell do you even call that other than replacing Dick’s parents and disrespecting Dick’s connection to them - you pretty much literally told him there that screw who inspired it and what his reasons for being Robin were, Robin still only existed according to Bruce’s say-so).
Anyway. And yeah, that’s also why I’m eternally grumpy at the usual fandom take that Tim does and should resent Dick for ‘taking Robin away’ and giving it to Damian, because....a) that’s not really what happened, Dick literally said that he couldn’t treat Tim like a sidekick because he saw them as equals, that it was time for Tim to figure out his own identity and see who he was outside of Robin, who he’d become thanks to his time in that role.
And also b) because.....like, it was Dick’s right, like it or not. That situation WASN’T comparable with Bruce taking it from Dick in the first place, or giving it to Jason, because the problem there wasn’t that it happened at all, it was that Robin wasn’t Bruce’s to take, or restrict, or regulate, let alone give away. Fire Dick from being his partner, yeah, sure, whatever. But telling him to hang up the last vestige of his family and former life that Dick had managed to hold onto all this time despite every attempt to take it away from him? And that’s the difference with what happened with Tim, because Dick was clear - this had nothing to do with his respect for Tim’s abilities or not thinking he was good enough to fight at his side, it was about thinking Tim was TOO good to be stuck JUST fighting at Dick’s side. 
And while Tim is completely justified in feeling any way he wants about not being Robin anymore, it was after all a huge part of his own identity.....like.....you don’t get to resent the guy who created it to preserve his own heritage and family identity, for having the nerve to think like....it should be up to him who wears it and when and why. If that doesn’t work for someone, if Jason or Tim had a problem with the idea that Dick specifically should always have more of a say in where the Robin mantle goes, like....that’s valid! BUT in the sense of like....they could’ve insisted on making their own identity/mantle in order to be Bruce’s partner/sidekick, if they didn’t want the originator of THAT particular mantle to have more of a right to it and its succession, ultimately.
Especially because the whole reason Dick made Damian Robin was he recognized that Damian needed it, in the same way he had needed it. Jason becoming Robin had nothing to do with Dick, and Tim approached Dick with his own perception of Robin and what it meant already firmly cemented in his mind - Robin was the light to Batman’s darkness, a necessary flip side of the coin that balanced Bruce out and kept him focused. Again, its totally valid for Tim to view Robin as whatever he viewed it as, for it to mean whatever it meant to him.....the problem is in acting like Dick’s perception of it should ever reflect that, or be altered to include that, or become less important than Tim or other Robins’ take on it as time went on. Not when Dick made it as a time capsule for his family and history, to make sure that WASN’T forgotten just because there were no more Flying Graysons on the trapeze anymore. 
So when you factor in that for Dick, Robin always meant family and always will mean family, his offering it to Damian was him doing the only thing he knew of that would give Damian a reason to stay, now that Bruce was dead. Robin was the only thing in the world that Dick had, that didn’t come from Bruce. As Bruce’s son, Damian was already entitled to anything that they inherited from Bruce, the same as his brothers....anything Dick gave Damian that came from Bruce originally, Damian honestly would’ve been justified in saying he had just as much right to it as Dick already. It wouldn’t have meant anything. Robin meant something though, because it was Dick making clear to Damian that he wanted him to stay, not just because Dick felt obligated to Bruce, to take care of Damian....but instead, Dick was saying he didn’t view it as obligation, he was offering Damian the one part of HIS family, Dick’s family, that Damian WASN’T already entitled to, by being part of Bruce’s.
Because Robin is a family tradition, always was. Its just not a WAYNE family tradition. Its just the latest version of the Flying Graysons, and thus all of Dick’s brothers became honorary Flying Graysons in his eyes the second he affirmed that they were Robin now, that he was okay with it, that he wanted them to be.
And you just....can’t cut out that one connection you have to the family with generations of history behind the mantle, that inspired it, that is the entire reason it exists for you to take up in the first place. Like, if you want to be part of a legacy, specifically, as in, you want to take up where a predecessor left off, you want to continue something that someone else started INSTEAD of starting something of your own, even something in a similar spirit and clearly inspired by it....well, you don’t get to pick and choose which parts of the legacy are worth acknowledging. Especially not when the person who created the mantle in the first place, specifically to carry on with his family’s legacy, is still around to have his own opinion on who currently needs it most.
Like don’t get me wrong. I love every single one of the Robins, including Stephanie, but in a comic book universe where the entire concept of legacies is given so much focus and priority, Robin ends up being a very weird outlier in that its originator and inspiration is only given as much weight as fans of his successors feel like giving at any given moment. Nobody ever writes fic or headcanons around the idea that upon Bruce coming back from the dead, he’d have just....no opinion on who should be Batman, let alone any right to have an opinion on that. Y’know? And again, its made all the more frustrating given that Robin’s the one mantle in the DC ‘verse that was created by its original holder as an homage/tribute to his family’s memory, rather than emblematic of some abstract idea or ideal.
*Shrugs* So yeah, I find myself very much in disagreement with most everyone in fandom on this one particular subject lol. Because I love Tim too! I do! And I’m definitely not saying that the other Robins weren’t just as iconic as Dick, just as deserving as the title or whatever, like I definitely don’t mean that any of them weren’t AS much Robin as Dick was.
Just that from an IN universe perspective, viewed from the POV of the characters, I think it just ends up being very skewed for any of the later Robins to act like they’re entitled to MORE say over Robin than Dick himself, when he’s the only connection any of them have or ever WILL have, to the ultimate origin and inspiration for it and everything its come to mean.....and that’s just....not Batman.
Its the Flying Graysons.
#lol this is more of a fandom inspired post than a canon inspired post#because canon has of course largely moved past all of these events and isnt even referencing them anymore#but like....again I do love Tim almost as much as I do Jason and Dick#but it gets really frustrating reading the twentieth fic in a row where Dick has to grovel for forgiveness for giving Robin to Damian#before Tim relents and decides things are okay between them again#siiiiiiiigh#and also minor related pet peeve#given that one of the other fandom takes Im most frustrated by is the almost universally accepted headcanon that Dick hated Jason pre death#and was just the worst to him#when like....no....they had a few rough interactions initially (all while Dick was brainwashed but lol NO ONE remembers that storyline)#but Dick of his own volition got over his issues with Jason within a relatively short period of time in universe#and reached out on his own to make peace with Jason and try and be a resource for him and building a relationship#Jason died before they had a chance to add much to that relationship but that doesn't mean it didnt exist#and it definitely doesnt mean Dick hated Jason and Jason believed Dick hated him#but my point is....given how everpresent in fics and headcanons the idea that Dick was a terrible brother and has a ton to make up for#with Jason#its really frustrating that nobody bats an eye at the idea that Tim is completely justified in holding a grudge for 'being replaced' by Dami#when even IF you're writing based on the take that this was a direct parallel to Bruce taking Robin from Dick and making Jason Robin#that STILL doesnt work out because in that parallel Tim would be in DICK'S original position#which should either mean he now understands and sympathizes with Dick for how hard that was for him#and why Dick initially had problems with Jason#OR it should mean Tim recognizes that he's doing the same thing EVERYONE constantly gives Dick grief for bc of Dick doing it to Jason#back then#but i mean#how does it make sense to say Tim vs Damian is exactly like Dick vs Jason#and Dick here is like Bruce was back then#only to then turn around and make Tim the sympathetic victimized party#while Dick is STILL the one who was in the wrong even back then too!#I just#I honestly dont get it
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casually-slips-into-coma · 4 years ago
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An Essay (sort of) Explaining the Many Grievances I Have With Debbie Gallagher
Once again, Debbie is the fucking worst.
I’ve been wanting to write out my feelings towards her character for a fucking minute now just so that I have a full concise list. Now, I can talk about how Debbie has a constant need for attention, or how her character has become someone unrecognizable in the past few seasons, or how she’s a terrible mother, but what I really want to focus on is the center of my issues with her: her sexuality. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t about to be a homophobic rant or anything. I just think her queer development has been written terribly and that should be addressed.
Too often I see people praising queer characters or relationships based solely on the fact that they are queer, and as a member of the community, I get it. I am also starved for representation. This, however, does not mean I’m going to settle for annoying, poorly written characters.
Why Make Debbie Queer?
The first thing I want to address is why suddenly develop a WLW storyline for her. Given that Debbie started as a little girl on the show, this gives the writers a lot of opportunity to give a character like that interesting storylines because she does not yet have a solid personality. It gives writers the liberty to take her story anywhere they want to without the constraints of established character because she, as a person, is still developing into adulthood. The show runners unfortunately dropped the ball with this.
From season 4 and onwards was when Debbie began showing interest in dating, sex, and romance having just turned the corner to puberty. From then up until season 9, she has shown exclusive interest in men. It isn’t until Alex the welder that Debbie deviates from this path. Alex is portrayed as a stud who confuses Debbie. I am inclined to believe that Debbie was originally attracted to her because she was masculine and therefore close enough to the people Debbie had previous experience with.
This arc was treated very much as Debbie experimenting with her sexuality, something that Alex also ends up realizing after Debbie tells her that having sex with a girl is “not that bad” and “like having sex with yourself” (S9E4). Once this storyline wrapped up (with Debbie shouting “you make me want cock again”) the writers powered through, adamant about Debbie now being a lesbian.
I have two theories as to why they’ve been fighting so hard for her queerness.
1) This was around the time that Cam was leaving Shameless. This obviously didn’t end up happening, but I was under the impression that the writers were freaking out at losing their token gay character and needed to fill that position. When Cam ended up staying, they were stuck with a queer Debbie storyline and decided to just go with it.
2) Shameless was planning on doing a WLW storyline regardless of Cam’s choice to leave and were originally going to give it to Fiona and her lesbian tenant that she had a close relationship and a lot of chemistry with, but Emmy Rossum wanted to move on from Shameless, and so they pivoted and gave the arc to Debbie, a character that was not supposed to be moved in that direction and so her new sexuality seemingly came out of nowhere. Fiona as a bisexual character would have made sense. Debbie still does not.
Shameless’s Awkward Relationship With Bisexuality
One of the biggest issues I have with Debbie is her insistence on being a lesbian. Lesbianism doesn’t come out of nowhere. Bisexuality, however, can. When you grow up being told that you are supposed to feel attraction to men, and you genuinely do feel attraction to men (which Debbie has expressed in past seasons/episodes) it’s easy to ignore your attraction to women and write it off as something that either isn’t a big deal, or something that isn’t there. It’s a lot more confusing than being strictly at one end of the spectrum. It would have been so much more believable if they had simply made Debbie bisexual. Unsurprisingly, they didn’t because the show has a history with bi erasure.
Bisexuality has been treated badly all throughout Shameless, used as a vengeful plot device back in the earlier seasons where Monica was only ever with women when unmedicated. Then in Season 7 when Ian’s boyfriend Caleb cheated on him with a woman (enforcing the stereotype of bisexuals being unfaithful) Ian, possibly acting out of anger or ignorance, said things like “only women are bisexual. When a man says he’s bisexual he’s really just gay”. The only semi positive bisexual representation on the show was Svetlana and Vee when they were in a poly relationship with Kev (though I also think that storyline wasn’t handled as well as it could’ve been).
This fight against the bisexual label in media is not a new one but it is also a harmful stance to take when writing a sexually fluid character. Debbie declaring that she is, in fact, a lesbian after waxing poetic about how Matty had a big dick and Derek had a great body and knew what he was doing is not the way to go. 
You could argue that Debbie, like many other queer women, is an unfortunate victim of compulsory heterosexuality, but frankly I don’t think the writers are well versed enough in queer theory for that to be a possibility.
Debbie as The White Feminist
Debbie is the pinnacle of white feminism. It’s an unfortunate thought that has occurred to me a few times throughout the show. She talks a big game as a man hater and someone after the equal treatment of women but she herself participates in a lot of problematic and anti feminist behavior.
For one, she r*ped Matty back in season 5 when he was blacked out and unconscious. This was a point in the story that was glossed over and one where she suffered no repercussions other than Matty no longer wanting to be around her. It was explained in the show that Debbie didn’t realize what she did was wrong until after she was explicitly told so because she was maybe 14 when it happened (not 100% on the age Shameless is very inconsistent about timelines). It was treated as somewhat of a punchline, something that Shameless has unfortunately done more than once when referring to male sexual assault (Mickey’s r*pe, Liam in season 10 ((i think??)) and in this latest season, Carl) but that is a different topic. 
There was also the time in which she lied to her boyfriend about being on birth control so she could trap him into a relationship with pregnancy (which also counts as r*pe!!) Good on Derek for getting out of that.
Debbie has also been pro-life in the past. Now I understand this was when Fiona was pressuring her into aborting her pregnancy, and as a pro choicer myself, I believe that Debbie was fully in her right to have bodily autonomy and go through with the pregnancy. This isn’t where the issue lies. It’s when Fiona finds out that she too is pregnant and tells Debbie that she wants an abortion that Debbie accuses her of “killing her baby”. Again, her behavior could be explained by her age given that Debbie was still a young teen during this time.
When her actions as a White Feminist become less excusable is mostly in the latest season. Her relationship with Sandy is one that I’m not really happy with because Debbie doesn’t deserve her.
Recently, it has been revealed that Sandy is actually married to a man and has a son. It’s explained that she was basically married off against her will at the age of 15 to a man twice her age. This implies that the product of the marriage, her son, was most likely conceived through dubious consent (or worse) at the hands of an adult when she was just a kid. Just because Debbie thinks that Sandy’s husband “seems nice” does not give her the right to try and make a victim of grooming feel bad about not wanting to be with her abuser. While I understand that Sandy’s son has no fault in how he came into the world, I’m still gonna side with Sandy when it comes to having to take care of a child she didn’t want and who is most likely a source of trauma for her. It’s not difficult to sympathize with Sandy and see that she’s clearly gone through something fucked up and Debbie, despite claiming to love and support her, AND despite her dumb white feminist arc about wanting equal pay and all that jazz, turns her back on the girls supporting girls aspect of feminism.
This isn’t even mentioning how shitty it was to just leave Franny by herself and assume that one of her siblings would take her to school and pick her up and stuff as if they don’t all have separate lives. She talks a lot about being a good mother but decided to “let off some steam” by fucking off to a gay bar to get loaded on coke and fuck a gay man (which wtf thats not a thing that really happens with casual coke but whatever I guess). Once she realized she fucked up, instead of taking responsibility she decided to paint herself as the victim as well as spew offensive bullshit about how she “probably has AIDS now” because of her sexual encounter with a gay man. No lesbian in their right fucking mind would ever say that because as members of the LGBTQ+ community, you are at least a tiny bit informed as to how devastating and tragic the AIDS crisis was for queer people.
(I also have an issue with how Debbie capitalized on her felony as a sex offender and her sexuality to start her Hot Lesbian Convict business but I think that’s enough said.)
Blame the writers
The show got almost an entirely new cast of writers after season 7 which is why the show feels more like a sitcom with low stakes and no consequences rather than a drama, but if there is a queer writer on the team it’s not very evident. Even the better half of the queer relationship story, Ian and Mickey, I don’t feel has really been done justice since the change in writers. It’s just become painfully obvious that the actress is a straight girl playing a gay character (not to mention I have never seen any chemistry between her and all of her female love interests). I don’t fault Emma Kenney (the actress) for this. I actually really like her as a person and I like the videos she makes about the cast and such, and I think she does her best with the script she’s given. My complaints with Debbie are targeted entirely towards the writers.
This brings me to my final point. I need them to let Debbie be alone. Her whole thing for the second half of the season has been that she clearly has abandonment issues and is afraid of being alone. It’s why she’s so adamant about keeping the house and fighting with Lip about it (I’m actually on Debbie’s side for that one but that’s besides the point). They had her and Sandy break up which leaves Debbie to spiral further into her loneliness. From a writing point of view, it makes sense to take this opportunity to give her an arc in which she can overcome that and feel comfortable with herself so that she can move on as an adult instead of jumping into a new relationship. This is especially true since this is quite literally the last season ever of the show and any character development needs to be wrapped up. Introducing a new character out of nowhere does not give the viewers enough time to actually get invested in the new relationship. It’s also unfair to Debbie’s character because her arc is going to feel incomplete.
Anyway,,,,,,uuuhhhhh,,,,,feel free to add on if u want lmao
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eponinemylove · 5 years ago
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Headcanons about the Andrew( and the foxes) figuring out some of the fucked up things Neil’s mom did. Like I’ve always had a head canon that she is the reason he says he’s fine all the time
for sure! I have a lot of feelings about Mary Hartford. I want to say that if the conversation does ever manage to come up, Neil would immediately jump to his mother’s defense. We see everything she did through his memories of her, and while we can recognize it as abuse, Neil still thinks of her fondly. She was the only family he really had, and in his eyes, everything she did was out of necessity, if not love (CW: abuse)
(side note, I’ve briefly talked about aaron’s reaction before as part of a different post, and I stand by that. I’ve also brushed upon the subject of Mary and Neil being “fine” when I did a sort of sickfic hc!)
let me just start by saying how awful this news would be for the foxes. Like, it’s awful in general because what she did was fucked up, but their poor hearts… They managed the Nest. They managed Baltimore. They managed Drake (although that was Andrew’s past not Neil’s, they were still there for the murder and everything that followed). They have been through heartbreak after heartbreak for this kid who not only went through these things but thought, on some level, that he deserved them. So they really can’t take finding out that his mother—who Neil openly condones—is also one of his ghosts. They can’t take finding out that she’s partly the reason why he doesn’t swing, why he can’t trust, why he runs and hides and lies, why he doesn’t think he can have this. And if that wasn’t hard enough, to find out that Neil thinks this is okay, that this is fine—it’s too much to handle.
Andrew’s first reaction, predictably, is murder. This doesn’t quite work out for him, as Mary’s already dead, but the urge he feels to drain the life from her himself is frankly concerning. The second the words are leaving Neil’s mouth, the second all his suspicions are confirmed (because let’s be real, Andrew knew someone had hurt Neil, and his father had been too many steps behind him to cause that much damage), he sees red. Full on, knives out, burning rage. He’s shaking with it. You can tell he’s feeling an emotion, because he’s not grumbling about anything. He’s gone into quiet rage, the dangerous kind, in which he silently plots all the ways he can gruesomely arrange your departure from existence.
for a split second, the upperclassmen think that his anger is directed at Neil, and they subtly move in to block him from Andrew’s war path. This works out well for no one, because Andrew needs Neil in his line of sight right now to know he’s safe and here, and anyone who even thinks of touching this boy after what he’s just confessed to happening to him is getting stabbed. Repeatedly. It’s not their fault for assuming, though. They saw what happened with him and Aaron after this sort of thing, and they just want to shield Neil from that fallout. He’s been through enough
The only thing that manages to calm him down even somewhat is Neil himself. He holds Andrew’s gaze, doesn’t hide under it. He looks him straight in the eye. He is fine, now. He isn’t hurt. He’s with Andrew, and Andrew is going to keep him safe, and Mary is dead, and there’s nothing for them to fight anymore.
except there is, there is, because Neil is stupid. Neil is an idiot who doesn’t know the meaning of the word fine, who has never been fine a day in his life. this was never okay. he’s worse than Aaron, because at least Aaron came to his senses eventually. but Neil, even after everything, is still standing there, defending her. it makes his blood boil. 140%. 170. 200.
Later, Andrew has to physically restrain himself from pulling him into a bruising kiss. He makes a tangible effort to be as gentle with Neil as he can, because he refuses to show him that love should be rough. It shouldn’t. He holds Neil’s hand and kisses his knuckles, runs his hands softly through his hair. He shows him all the way touches should feel when coming from someone you trust. Neil thinks it isn’t necessary but he accepts it with a stuttering heart anyway. His hands shake.
Aaron is seething, but for an entirely different reason. He’s furious, because how does Neil not realize that they’re the exact same? Neil gave him so much shit when he was upset over his mother, but now he has the audacity to stand here and spout this crap? The only thing holding him back from beating the shit out of Josten himself is Andrew’s presence, radiating wrath from beside him. If he took a step in the wrong direction, his brother might genuinely kill him this time. It doesn’t matter. Neil went on and on and on about how Andrew was protecting him, how his mother was not someone who loved him but someone who hurt him, and how he should be glad she’s gone. And… and then this? No. No. Neil doesn’t get to love his mother after that. Mary hit him. She beat him to a pulp herself, nevermind what she said she was protecting him from. He wasn’t allowed to have friends, to talk to people, to go outside. He wasn’t allowed to speak. He’d had to keep his head down. Yeah, it sounds familiar. It sounds like Aaron’s quiet footsteps around the house, hoping to god he wouldn’t wake up Tilda. It sounds like him trying not to make himself seen when she came home after a night of using, like ducking his head and not meeting the eyes of her or anyone she brought home. It sounds like her fists on him when she was in one of her moods. It sounds really fucking familiar, and if Neil thinks he’s going to drop this, he is dead wrong.
Neil did not leave well enough alone when it was Aaron. He would not stop rubbing salt on the wound. And it hurt, a lot, but now Aaron is going to do the same. Not just for petty vengeance. Not just because Neil is a dick and this is payback. But because it helped. Aaron and Andrew are not on the same page about the way they feel, but they are about what to do next. Priority one is make sure Neil moves on, make sure he recognizes why Mary was wrong, and why it will never happen again, as long as any of the foxes have a say in it. 
Matt and Nicky have the exact same reaction, which to immediately have their heart shattered. They’re in tears. Matt cares about Neil so, so much, and I know the fandom recognizes this, but I don’t know if people realize how deeply Nicky cares, too. It’s more than just cracking jokes; Neil is one of Nicky’s best friends. They’re going to make damn sure that Neil knows they will love him unconditionally, and that their love does not come heavy-handed. They will support him through this, even if they hate Mary for everything she had conditioned into him. Already they’re planning what they can do to get his mind off of this and get him smiling again as soon as possible. Nicky will probably push Neil harder than Matt, and it will probably be the wrong thing to do, but he’s trying so hard. He’s done this before, with Andrew and Aaron, and as heartbreaking as it was, he continues to do it because he loves them. And he loves Neil, too. Both Matt and Nicky already have adoption papers at the ready, and at this point they’re going to forge the signatures, consequences be damned, if it means Neil gets a happy life. 
Kevin doesn’t have much to say about it when he finds out. I imagine he handles it with all of his usual finesse and sensitivity, which is none. He probably, not too gently, points out that Mary had a job to keep him safe from harm, all harm, and failed spectacularly at it. It’s not exactly helpful, but he does have a point. And when he get Neil alone, he offers to talk to him about it. He may not have been through the same thing, but he’s been through something similar enough. He had no family at the Nest, but at the same time they were the only ones he had, and they weren’t exactly gentle with him at the best of times. Riko and the Master weren’t Mary, but... they weren’t all that different, either. Like everything else, Kevin is there if he needs him. 
Dan and Allison stare him down. They sympathize, they do, because this is awful, but they are not going to give him an inch. They don’t have time to coddle his feelings about his mother, and god help him if they hear an “I’m fine” fall from his lips. They’ll hold him, if he lets them, and they’ll be as soft and gentle as he needs, but they won’t give in to this. They aren’t going to pretend that he’s right–he’s not. HIs mother wasn’t what he remembers. She’s a complicated character. They’re not calling her evil; maybe she did what she had to, and maybe it was for the best. But it wasn’t right. They are steadfast in that. It wasn’t right. Neil can accept that when he’s ready, and when he does they will be there for him, taking care of him in their unassuming way so that he doesn’t feel like they’re walking on eggshells. He’s so grateful to have them. Grateful that they don’t push, but don’t give in either. Some of the strongest people he’s known…
Renee is the one who actually talks him through it. All the others are ready with their pitchforks, about to burn Mary at the stake, but she understands. She walks with him through everything, the good and the bad, and lets him come to his own conclusion. She listens to him when he feels like talking about what is was like, and talks about her own mother when he doesn’t. She shows him, subtly, what a parental figure is supposed to look like through her own stories. Lets him realize that sometimes the people who care don’t get it right, but that there are still others who love you, and that love doesn’t have to come with pain. 
Bonus:
(Ik you didn’t ask, and this is probably too long already, but) Wymack and Abby find out about this indirectly, likely through either Andrew or Matt. Wymack had known from the beginning this would have been the case, but he’d had no idea it had come from his mother. It hurts him, that no one had ever been careful with Neil the way he needed. He doesn’t realize that he had been, though. Wymack hadn’t raised his voice, hadn’t made himself big in front of Neil. He had been careful to keep his anger far, far away and had always been there when Neil needed him. Wymack is his true father. Or mother. Or whatever. 
Abby does what she does with Aaron: she gives him space. She knows that he’s probably never seen a woman in a comforting light before, and she waits to make sure that he’s okay with her presence before she gets anywhere near close to him. She lets him come to her, and, like Wymack, makes sure Neil knows that if she ever gets frustrated, that she would never take it out on him. They start the very slow process of showing Neil what it is like to be loved and cared for by someone who wants only to see you happy. Neil loves his family so, so much. He would choose them a thousand times over. 
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fandomout · 4 years ago
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Dean Winchester Imagine/Preference - After he left you stranded Part 2
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Part 1 Dean Winchester Imagine/Preference- He leaves you stranded (Gender Neutral Reader)  
I don’t own this gif, but all I know is it’s from tenor.
This takes place a around season 5 and 6 just for reference as to some things said and Castiel makes appearance. Angst/Fluff.
“You fucking asshole! You fucking suck!” Although you felt a little better, you looked like a crazy person to the people passing. You covered your shoulders in hopes to lessen the bumps that textured your skin. You were lost in your thoughts when you collided into a body. You looked up to see, but you were barely able to make out their face. Tears were blurring your vision. You wiped one of your eyes, which gave you enough visibility to make out Castiel. You didn’t even bother wiping the tears and simply asked him, “What are you doing here? Did something happen? Are you okay?”
“What I am doing here is that I heard your cries of distress. Also, I was wondering who you were referring to.”
“Don’t worry, I wasn't talking to god, or you, or some angel...just the world...Me and Dean got in a fight.”
“I did see a glance of that interaction, my apologies.”
”You didn’t mean to...Wait, you came because I was crying?”
”Yes. I was wondering what trouble there could be that would make you cry. Through most of our encounters, you’ve seemed very level headed and calm, so it had to be of importance...Well, I assumed.”
“Sorry to disappoint. It’s just relationship drama.”
“Disappointment doesn’t correlate to me and your situation. It wouldn't make sense.”
“I don’t mean it literally.”
“Ah.”
“I’m sorry. You came for nothing.”
“He left you here. Why?”
“Cleary, he doesn't care...enough...if at all.”
“But, you are in a relationship. Are you not? Why would he leave you here if he cared?”
“Hell if I know.”
“Anyway, it is not for nothing that I came. I can provide comfort.”
“I really don’t need it. There’s nothing you could say.”
“But, you need it.”
“There are more important things...you probably need to get back to your war, right?” He replied with a heavy sigh and the words, “I could use the break.”
“Let’s talk about you. It would make me feel better if you felt a little better.”
“How can I feel better?”
“Just tell me how you feel about the war. How’s the war going? I’m sure that’s a stupid question, but I thought it was better than not asking anything. I know we don’t pay enough attention to you on the personal level...I��m sorry we haven’t been able to help you. I’m sorry you have to kill your brothers and sisters…”
“Thank you...You are the only one whose expressed concern to me…It’s simply terrible at all times.” You put a hand on his shoulder and keep walking. ”So, where are you going?”
“I don’t know.”
“I can take you back to where you were residing.” Castiel reaches forward to take your shoulder, but you move back from him before he gets the chance. He furrows his brows and tilts his head at you. A look of pure innocent confusion.
“No. I will tough it out. If he’s just gonna leave me here, I’m gonna make my own way. I refuse to be helped.” 
“Why?”
“For some dignity or pride with a hint of stupidity because it's cold and gonna be a long walk.” 
“I could take you to the motel, and you could call it your way. You are exercising your resource, i.e me.”
“No, Cas. I don’t want to take the easy route. He thinks he can control me and make me feel worse? Nope! I’m gonna get there on my own, and he can't say anything. He doesn't deserve the satisfaction. I walk for me and me only.”
“I do not understand. I do not understand your desire to take the difficult path.”
“Sometimes it’s...it’s worth it. The hard way has its moments. Plus, Cas, you shouldn't have to take me.”
“I want to.” A blast of light strikes before it starts pouring rain. You continue on your pace, unwavering. 
“Has your plan changed?!” Castiel yelled over how loud the rain was.
“Nope! Well-I think I’m just gonna walk all the way to the motel we were at! Get my things and get out of there!”
“That’s a bad plan!”
“Best one I’ve got! I only have $20 on me, and I left my stuff in Dean’s car!”
“You’re going to get sick!” He says, but it gets muffled by the sound of thunder. 
“What?!”
“I said you’ll get sick!”
“So be it! I’ll live!” 
“I should head back!” He looked regrettable because he doesn’t want to go. You give him the best smile you can muster and give him a hug along with the words, “Thank you for being here for me although unintentional!”
“I express my appreciation to you asking about me. Hope you have safe travels; however, unlikely I think it is right now!” You laugh a bit at his words. You weren't sure how to respond, but it didn't matter. You never got the chance to as he flew away. You feel a bit better having talked to Castiel. You're thankful for the rain sympathizing with you, and you think you’ve stopped crying. Determined, you walk all night until you get to the motel at about 6:30 am. You were lucky enough to find someone to check you in. With a very hoarse voice, you say, “Can I get the room key for 321 B? I lost mine.”
“I can't just let you in, lady.” He says firmly.
“You saw me come in with those two big guys.”
“Oh. Yeah.” You leave your hand out ready, but he continues to say, “Still...I can't just give it to you.” You reach forward frustrated and grab him by the collar. You take out the $20 from your pocket. 
“Listen, bud-You either take my $20 and give me the key, or I take the key, forcefully. Your choice.” He reaches for it desperately and hands it to you. You open the door, and you see both Sam and Dean still asleep. You quietly get your things, and you head back to the clerk. He moves to the wall, scared. You put money on the table. 
“Give me a room for one.” He taps uneasily, but does as you say quickly. 
“Thank you.” You go to your new room. Immediately, you head for the water and chug it down earnestly. You sneeze three times in a row and wipe your nose. You change your clothes into warmer attire, which ends in pj’s. You get over to the bed and cover yourself in the blankets. You feel some kind of warmth reach your body, but you can't help still feeling cold. You grab tissue next to yours and have to keep blowing mucus out of your body. 
“Gret.” You said nasally. “I’m fucking sick.” You shrug and close your eyes as your weak and tired body won’t allow anything else to happen.
No One’s POV
Dean wakes up to being shaken harshly. He pulls out his gun from under the pillow and says, “What?” His eyes meet Sam’s, and Sam asks, “Where’s Y/N?” Dean puts his gun down; After sitting up, he tries to respond before he cuts himself off and remembers everything from last night. “They’re somewhere...”, He says pursing his lips and starts putting his clothes back on. 
“Somewhere?”
“Yeah.” He says and puts on his boots.
“What happened?”
“Why are you asking?”
“Clearly, something happened because you won’t give me a straight answer. Where are they?”
“I don’t know.”
“What?!”
“We got in a fight...”
“And?!”
“And I...left them.” He said softly that Sam couldn’t hear.
“What?”
“I left them at the bar.” He said firmly.
“You’re such a dick! Fucking asshole! They're not here! Something could have happened to them!”
“I know! I know…” Dean stood up and looked around the room. His eyes landed on the couch where their bag should be. His mouth became very dry, and his heart panged. “Oh god…” He whispered. 
“What?” Sam asked as he looked in Dean’s direction. As Sam came to the same relaxation, he clenched his jaw, and said, “You really fucking suck!” Dean just walked over to his keys on the counter and headed out the door. Sam hurriedly got his jacket and followed after. “Where the hell are you going?”
“The bar.”
“I doubt they're there.”
“What makes you say that?”
“It’s not like they can stay there all night. It was raining last night too. They can't just sit outside the bar like they’re living there.”
“You don’t know. They could've stayed put.”
“They didn’t get fucking lost! And they’re not some child! You left them there! Left your s/o there!” Dean can only clench his jaw and start the car. As they arrive at the bar, they ask anyone around, but no one knows where they’d gone. Dean got back into Baby and he jerked the steering wheel angrily. “Dammit!...” He let out a breath. “Where would they go?”
“Somewhere to sleep?” Sam tells him with a shrug.
“How’s that work?”
“What do you mean?” Dean gestures to the back where their jacket was. Sam picks it up and looks inside of it to see their phones and wallet. “Great! Just great Dean! You left them without anything! There is no way of finding them.”
“Sam, can you shut the hell up?! I know I messed up! I know I'm the fucking asshole that left his s/o stranded in the rain! I’m fucking selfish!-” He stopped for a moment and his eyes became teary. He looked out the window for Sam not to see him, and in a weak voice said, “Something could have happened...” Dean held the steering wheel until is knuckles turned white. Sam looked at him sympathetically and said, “I’m glad you know. Look, Let’s head back to the motel.”
“What?! We can't just-”
“If you were upset enough to leave them, I know they're more upset. They didn’t try to contact me or anyone, so chances are they figured it out...I mean if nothing happened...They’ll probably be stubborn enough to get back on their own. The bar is far from the motel on foot, but they probably walked, D.” As Sam and Dean pull into the motel, Dean paces around in nervousness. Having done so for about 2 minutes, his eyes end up landing on the small frame of someone by the vending machine. He looked down to their shoes to see the wrecked combat boots he’d been seeing for the longest. He basically jogged up. Sam followed slowly in confusion. Dean’s eyes met their face, and he fully ran over to them. He scooped them in his arms. His arms wrapped over their waist. 
Your POV
Dean let out a shaky breath and smiled. With teary eyes, he reached to cup your face. You moved away from his touch and took yourself out of his embrace. 
“Y/N-”
“Sam, how are you this morning?!” You asked. You were not going to just let him off the hook. While he looked worried, you remembered how unimportant you seemed last night, so you ignored him. In your peripherals, you could see Dean licked his lips nervously. 
“Better. Now, that you're no longer missing. We-” Sam replied and was cut off by Dean saying, “Where the hell were you?!” You ignored his worry and responded, “Sam, you didn’t have to worry. I just got another room for myself this time around.”
“We went everywhere looking for you. Glad you're safe.”
“Than-Achoo!” You put your nose on your sleeve. Dean reached over in calmer composure to grab your arm and tell you, “Come on, red nose, we’ll get you better.” You pulled away from him. You looked toward Sam and said, “I’m gonna get myself something warm and sleep a bit more. I had a loooong night.” You couldn’t help being a little shit since you felt it was owed to you for the shitty night you had before. You padded Sam’s shoulder and told him, “I’m gonna head back to my room see you later.” before you left towards your room. With a heavy heart and footsteps, you were in the need to feel some kind of better since being sick didn’t help.  When you got into your room, you went into the bathroom to take a look in the mirror. “Oh. I do look terrible.” You turned on the showerhead and walked back into the main space only to see Dean. You gave him one more second until you averted your eyes and resumed ignorance of his existence. You were getting clothes when you heard the shower turn off. You rolled your eyes and were making your way back to the bathroom when Dean blocked your path. You sighed heavily and threw you clothes on the couch. You walked back over to your bed, curled into the blanket and tried to get back to sleep. You felt his eyes on you, but you refused to look at him. You felt the bed starting to dip, and you couldn’t help state, “Don’t.”
“We’ve got to talk…” He said delicately. You sat up and looked at him as he shifted nervously in a way that made you just want to go hug him. Instead, you stayed put and found the words, “Talk.” slipping past your lips.
Part 3  Dean Winchester Imagine/Preference - Making up after he left you stranded (Gender Neutral Reader) Part 3
Hope your day got better
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gallavictorious · 4 years ago
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“Will you suck my dick whenever I want?” Sex, Power, and the Gallavich Modes of Communication.
Becaue of reasons I want to talk a bit about the rather infamous “suck my dick” scene of 4x08.
This is a complicated scene and I have complicated feelings about it, which is pretty much the above-mentioned 'reasons' for writing this exploratory meta: when in confoundment, hash it out by putting all your thoughts down on paper. Fair warning: this is long, and since it deals with dubious consent you might want to give it a miss if discussion of that sort of thing upsets you. Same goes if you believe that Ian really is just asking for unlimited access to blowjobs, or find extensive (over)analysis of fictional works silly.
The accusation sometimes levelled at Ian in regards to this scene is that he's being manipulative and practically forcing Mickey into performing sexual acts he would otherwise not perfom, taking advantage of Mickey's emotional vulnerability to secure sexual pleasure for himself. He certainly issues an ultimatum and this scene is uncomfortable to watch because of that, but at the same time it's always seemed pretty obvious to me that endless blowjobs isn't really Ian's objective here. If that's all he wanted, he could easily get that without having to resort to extortion: finding sexual partners has never been a problem for him. No, there are other things at work, and below I try to figure out what.
Let's kick of by a quote from Oscar Wilde: “Everything is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.”
Because yes, this is about power rather than sex – which is another way of saying that what Ian truly wants isn't for Mickey to give him a blowjob, but for Mickey to agree to do it in spite of his initial reluctance. Which still isn't a very flattering look for Ian, because neither demanding blowjobs nor demanding your partner's submission is particularly charming (outside of negotiated kink, of course). However, I think it's fair to say that the power Ian seeks here is not the power to (permanently) place himself above Mickey, but the power to once more level the playing field between them and regain some sense of the agency and control that Ian felt he lost during the whole mess leading up to Mickey's wedding.
From the very start, Ian's been wanting more from Mickey than Mickey's been willing or able to give (not because Mickey isn't as into Ian as Ian is into him, but because of all that other shit: you know well what I'm talking about). To a large extent, Ian's been reining himself in, wary of asking too much, lest he scare Mickey off. Whenever he's openly pushed for more – trying to kiss Mickey, putting his hand on the glass, insisting that Mickey do not murder his father – Mickey has brusquely rebuffed him. However, he's had quite a bit of success with less direct methods, as when he 'gets' Mickey to kiss him by explaining that one of the reasons he likes Ned is that Ned isn't afraid to. (And for the record, I don't think this was a conscious ploy by Ian: he was simply being honest with Mickey, in a way that also conveyed his disappointment in Mickey's continued unwillingness to kiss.)
Ian's been in love with Mickey for a long time. For a long time, he doesn't tell Mickey this, which  is partly due to the above-mentioned fear of scaring Mickey off, and partly due to Ian genuinely not being sure if Mickey likes him back. (“How do you know if a guy you've been hanging out with likes you?”) But following the very obviously jealous beatdown of Ned, the kiss in the van, and the invitation to a sleep-over, Ian is finally convinced that Mickey does indeed like him too – only 3x06 happens and Mickey is not only shutting him out again, he's getting married to someone else.
But knowing what he now knows – i.e. that Mickey is in love with him – Ian doen't back off or try (to the best of his feeble ability) to play it cool. He puts himself out there, he puts his emotions on display, and he repeatedly begs Mickey not to get married.
Mickey gets married all the same.
Now, Ian has a strong sense of integrity and does not enjoy having to depend on someone else. Ian is not very good at admitting when he's wrong. Ian is proud. Because of this and quite apart from the heartbreak of losing Mickey to marriage, I'd imagine that he's feeling less than great about being scorned after having been so open about his wishes. (Well. Scorned is a somewhat strong word: Mickey's obviously still down for him, but he's not willing to give Ian what he wants – a real relationship, as Ian defines it.) As far as Ian is concerned, the situation has created a tangible power gap between them, with Mickey having the upper hand. (It might be argued that the power gap's been there the entire time, with Ian wanting more than Mickey was willing to give, but up until that point Ian has not actively asked for things Mickey's made clear is out of bounds but has accepted Mickey's marking of boundaries with a shrug and an 'oh'.)
Mickey's broken “don't” as Ian announces his intention to enlist isn't enough to bridge that gap: it's an admission of feeling, of need, but does not indicate any intention on Mickey's part to further act on that feeling. It doesn't change anything: Ian still wants a commited relationship, Mickey still wants Ian around to fuck him even while he stays married to Svetlana.
And for all that we sympathize with Mickey – which we bloody well should, because he was the victim of a horrible crime and trapped in the shittiest of situations through no fault of his own – it isn't unreasonable of Ian to not want to be the secret 'mistress' of a closeted man. He's been there, done that, and quite understandably wants more from Mickey. He isn't wrong for trying to extricate himself from that situation, even as it's utterly understandable why Mickey isn't able to give him what he wants at the time.
Life's like that, kids. Sometimes there are no good choices, and sometimes no one's at fault even though everything's an absolute mess and people get hurt. (I mean, Terry's at fault. Terry is a huge fucking cunt.)
It bears saying that Ian isn't a saint and doesn't behave perfectly in this situation: he shows little understanding for Mickey's entirely justifiable fears, and rather than telling Mickey that he loves him, he insists that Mickey admits that he loves Ian, which I do find a bit presumptuous. Ian's small smile when Mickey comes close to breaking when Ian announces his plan to leave indicates that he finds some small measure of pleasure in knowing that he's hurt Mickey the way Mickey has hurt him: though I think it's not primarily pleasure in the hurt itself, but rather pleasure in what it signifies, i.e. that Mickey does care about him too. But that isn't enough; that isn't really news.
So he enlists and that goes the way it goes and then Mickey seeks him out at the club and brings him home, to the bed Mickey normally shares with his wife. This, I think, tells Ian something; it suggests something beyond Mickey just having feelings for him. It's just a suggestion, mind, so it doesn't actually resolve anything, but it's enough of a something that Ian's willing to have a conversation about possibly returning when Mickey comes to see him at the Gallagher house.
But Ian has a problem. If he simply goes back to be being with Mickey without anything changing he has effectively agreed to the sort of arrangement he joined the army to very pointedly escape. Quite apart from him not wanting that sort of relationship, it would signify a failure to proud guy Ian, and following his failure to even make it through basic, I think that's not something he's willing to allow. He still wants to be with Mickey, though. Knowing that Mickey is as unlikely to divorce his wife now as he was to call off the wedding, Ian can't ask for that; he can't ask again for the type or relationship he really wants – but he can't go back to what they had previously either. This puts him in a pretty  tough spot, and I think this is why he asks for Mickey to suck his dick. While not achieving exactly what he wants it still gives him enough of a something that he feels comfortable resuming his relationship with Mickey:
Firstly, it serves to even the score and redistribute the power between them. Yes, this is him asking Mickey to submit to him and for Mickey to acknowledge Ian's power over him, but it's a request made from what Ian perceives to be a position of weakness (because of the whole Ian putting himself out there and Mickey getting married in spite of that). By momentarily placing himself above Mickey, Ian seeks balance the scales, bringing them back to an even level. This is a one-time thing, over and done with once Mickey agrees. Evidence suggests this works very well, too: look at their interactions the next day, when they're back to their normal and easy back and forth. Even so, it's a pretty fucked up thing to ask for, but we need to remember that Ian has a fairly complicated relationship with sex, given all that he's been through, and probably doesn't take this kind of thing nearly as seriously as we might want him to.
Secondly, Ian wants Mickey to commit to an emotional honesty he has so far resisted. If they can't be an official couple, he still wants that much. They were getting somewhere before Terry fucked everything up, and Ian has zero interest in going back to a relationship where Mickey pretends that it's only about the banging and shies away from any notions of an emotional involvement.
Ian wants Mickey to let himself be vulnerable with Ian, and while performing a sexual act to signify a commitment not to let things be only about sex seems pretty damned contradictory at first glance, this specific type of sexual act – which is bitch-coded in the enviroment Mickey has grown up in and which he probably finds hard to admit that he likes (until he doesn't: “I suck his dick and I love it” – but this line really supports both the idea that Mickey doesn't in fact mind sucking Ian's dick and that it's something that isn't “appropriate” for him to like; else he wouldn't have thrown it in Terry's face like that) – signifies more that just the sexual act itself: Ian knows that Mickey likes sucking his dick, and he wants Mickey to own that (as Mickey owns being a bottom): he wants Mickey to lay off the bullshit and be honest about who is and what he wants, to Ian, if not to anyone else at this point. The last time Ian asked this of Mickey, Mickey kicked him in the face, so I don't think it's too hard to see why Ian would go about it in this way rather than asking for what he really wants outright.
What he seeks here is a promise of a long-time commitment, and that's why the “whenever I want” bit is significant, because it points ahead to the future, even if Ian has no intention of enforcing the actual sucking of dicks bit.
And I think it's very important that both Ian and Mickey are ver clear about the fact that Ian will not enforce this. I think they are: for all that they have trouble communicating at times, this is the sort of subtle signalling they are pretty good at. I guess it comes down a bit to character intepretation though: I just don't think Ian would seriously ask this of Mickey, and I don't think Mickey would agree to it either. They both see this for the one-time act of submission it is, with all that it signifies and symbolizes.
(Let's be clear: if Ian had actually continued to enforce this demand, leading them down a path of a 'blow me right now or I'm leaving' that would have been pretty damned horrible. The reason I don't think this happened, apart from finding it OOC, is the complete lack of evidence that things are weird between them going forward, and if Ian had been forcing Mickey, a rape victim, into performing sexual acts, things sure as hell would have been weird between them. After this, they're back on an even footing: they sure have conflicts, which culminates with Mickey coming out [and, yes – demanding that someone come out isn't great, especially when that someone is facing the kind of threats Mickey is, but at the same time it's perfectly reasonable for Ian not to want to stay in a secret relationship: again, it's a fucked-up situation with no good choices], but they're on level fighting ground. It's not the sort of conflict resolution I'd recommend, but it apparently worked for them, and given their generally messy dynamic, I'm not really surprised.)
In fairness, Ian isn't really being nice about this whole thing, and there's absolutely some glee and triump when Mickey actually agrees to do it. A sense of vindication, surely, after what happened between them just before Ian left. But do notice that while Ian kind of does rub it in – “suck my dick, whenever I want” with that pleased smile – he doesn't in fact make Mickey say it, even though Mickey's request – “don't make me say it, asswipe” – does make it clear that if Ian demands it, Mickey will. There is an element of payback to this whole exchange, there's no denying that, but Ian's not out to actually be cruel to Mickey: he wants them to be back on even and equal ground, and he wants Mickey to own his desires and emotions.
So yeah, it's still not great by any means, and it's still uncomfortable to watch, but if we take into account Ian's somewhat causal relationship to sex in general, as well as Mickey's unwillingness both to emotionally commit and to actually talk about things, I think it's fair to say that Ian is not trying to manipulate Mickey, but rather to stand his ground and express his wishes in a way that he believes Mickey can and will play along with. (I, incidentally, think that Ian might be wrong, and that it's possible that Mickey has missed him enough and worked with himself enough that if Ian had made instead asked “will we actually talk about our feelings” Mickey would have gone along with that too, to the best of his ability – but this is actually way easier for Mickey to roll with.) It is pretty messed up, but viewed through the lense of their shared history and less than straightforward modes of communication, it does make a whole lot of sense.
To me at least – as always, feel free to disagree or add your own perspectives. I view meta as an invitation to discuss, not as a finalized argument to end discussion, and there are certainly aspects I haven’t touched upon here. And if you have seen this discussed before, I'd be super grateful if you'd point in me in the right direction.
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crestfallercanyon · 4 years ago
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Why do fanfic writers all write Gally as older than Thomas? I mean, have whatever headcanons you want, this isn't about hating on anything, but I'm just kind of confused. It's so prevalent in the fanfics I read where authors reference Gally as "the older boy", and Thomas as "the younger" that I think people just think that's true. However, Gally was canonically younger than Thomas. Alby and Minho were around 17, Thomas and Newt a year or so younger, and Gally was a year or two after that (and Chuck was uncharacteristically young being around 13). I mean, the age difference isn't super big or anything, but the fact that it's so referenced in fanfiction makes it become kind of relevant. Gally was always described as being BIGGER than Thomas (in the books he's tall, whereas Thomas was described as being fairly short) and this was something they really did well with the casting of the movies because Gally in the movies is HUGE and kind of a sheer force of nature. To me, so much of the tragedy and growth of Gally's character was nuanced by the fact that he was actually one of the younger boys. He was put in this conflicting position because he wasn't actually one of the older boys, so he didn't really fit there, but he wasn't one of the younger boys either because he was a point of authority as the Keeper of the Builders. It created a really compelling dynamic in Gally and Thomas' interactions (or Gally with anyone, actually). But Thomas and Gally's dynamic is one of the best written aspects of TMR, in my humble opinion. Gally's just an amazing foil for Thomas.
This is shown in the fact that Thomas and Gally always wanted what's best for the Gladers, but disagreed on what that meant. Gally wanted to protect everyone by staying in the Glade, because it was familiar and he knew how the rules worked and he didn't want that to get shaken up. Which is a huge contrast to Thomas who was inquisitive about everything and wanted to take risks and get out. And they really began digging their heels into their ideologies because Thomas was desperate to be free and Gally was desperate to belong. To me, this really highlighted that Gally was younger, because Gally was clinging so hard to stay their Glader "band of brothers" he couldn't really see the big picture. So when Thomas was explaining, proving, that none of them belonged in the Glade, it wasn't a freeing revelation for Gally, but a freaking nightmare. Instead of seeing Thomas as an opportunity, he became a threat, and when so many of his friends started siding with Thomas, Gally took it really personally. Which was a mistake. Because Thomas wanted what was best for the Gladers too, and had enough information to go off of to know that the Glade wasn't it (which isn't that also a hit that Gally can take personally since he practically built that home). And this is more referencing the movies now, but the scene where Thomas tells Gally to come with them, that they should all get out, it's totally sincere and it's so freaking sad. Thomas wanted to convince Gally to go with them -- Thomas didn't want to leave him behind, didn't want anyone to stay in the Glade because he thought that they would die if they remained. Conversely, Gally thought Thomas' leaving would be the death of him and everyone who went with, so of course Gally's not going to go with Thomas, and he wants to convince everyone about to go with Thomas not to go, either. And the whole thing paints a horrific picture because they both think the other is dooming their friends. Dooming themselves.
(super spoilers here) But that's why I think it's so important that Gally finds his way back the way he does (especially in the books). After WICKED's control of him brought him to such horrible means, and Thomas is the one to beat the living hell out of him and leave him for dead (which was understandable in the moment considering the circumstances of Chuck, even if it was all orchestrated by WICKED), WICKED heals him and then holds him captive. Gally gets to see WICKED for the monster that it really is, and find out what lengths they'll go to orchestrate their lives. But then he gets out and ends up with the Right Arm! In TDC, he is the one to reach out to Thomas about where to go in Denver! It's not exactly the most eloquent of olive branches, but I think it signifies that Gally now understands, and is now a team player, which is all he ever wanted to be but now he's willing to see the whole picture and actually be a good team player, and it's just -- so good.
Gally is such a damn good character because though he's a bit of a dick, he's not just inexplicably a villain. His perspective makes a heck of a lot of sense. There are many who, in the same exact position, would come to many of the same exact conclusions he does in TMR. In fact, Thomas even has an understanding of Gally and his perspective. Thomas gets it, he just doesn't agree. (which, again, not that wisdom always comes with age, but I think it is kind of another highlighting moment that Thomas is older than Gally as he is willing to see Gally's perspective and understand it and sympathize with it but Gally does not reciprocate that in any way, shape, or form, until TDC). Though Thomas and him are never what one would call the best and closest of friends (Gally does admit that he wanted to see Thomas dead) I just really enjoy their dynamic. In my brain, I think in Safe Haven they'd actually get along really, really well. They'd actually make one hell of a team, because Gally is practical and grounding and Thomas is risk-taking and inquisitive, but they're both brave and working toward very similar goals.
This rant has officially become *too long* and swerved off of just being about why do fanfic writers so often write Gally as older than Thomas when canonically he's not, but. Oh well. It needed to be out of my head and onto this blog, I guess.
(also, it has been a million years since I've read these books, there may be things I'm missing, but the movies have reinspired me and I just -- I've got a lot of feels on the matter)
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dicecast · 5 years ago
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The Paradox of Draco Malfoy
Or: Why do People like Draco Malfoy
      Who are the most important characters from Harry Potter?  If you were a marketer and had to design a set of I  don’t know, candy for each of the main characters, who do you include?  You only have 9 slots.  The Trio obviously are the main characters, and then Voldemort, Snape and Dumbledore. Neville, Hagrid, and then in the last slot you’d probably put Malfoy.   And the question is…..why?
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(character looks much cooler than he is)
See Draco Malfoy is an iconic character of franchise, easily one of the most memorable and beloved characters, certainly he has received the most fanfiction, but looking at the books…Malfoy isn’t that important.  He only majorly effects the plot in the first and 6th book, and even then he is never the central forces of either story, his role in the story is usually just him showing up, being kinda of a dick, and then something bad happening to him.  Barry Crouch jr and Sr, are in every way more important characters to the plot and themes of the story, and yet they aren’t really registered as major characters.  
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(this character matters a lot more)
And it isn’t just that he is iconic, I mean Boba Fett is iconic and he barely does anything, but Malfoy is loved.  I mean there is a Tv Trope “Draco in Leather Pants” for a reason, in fact in many ways he is more beloved and admired than Ron, who is an actual character who does stuff.  And I can’t empathies this enough, the sheer amount of Malfoy fanfiction out there is overwhelming, I know fanfiction will elevate any character given enough time, but there is a reason why I know about this, despite never reading HP fanfiction.  I mean the Very Potter Musical makes Malfoy the secondary protagonist on equal billing to Harry Himself, and honestly gets more of an arch.  Which is particularly puzzling because again
Malfoy isn’t that important of a character.  
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   Almost every Malfoy scene actually in the books follows certain beats, and you can break them down.  Malfoy approaches Harry, Harry’s friends, or some helpless weak kid who Harry feels obligated to protect, Malfoy is a colossal asshole, and he either leaves smugly or is humiliated.  Or Malfoy actively tries to do something dickish like dress up like a dementor, or ambush Harry &co on the train, which inevitably back fires and he ends up humiliated.  Even random lines that mention him basically boil down to “Malfoy did something dickish”.  Occasionally you will have a scene where some element of the world is explored by something bad happeing to Malfoy, like Harry using the invisibility cloak to fuck with him, or Malfoy being forced to go into the woods, or Malfoy getting turned into a ferret.  Until book 6, he is basically just a bit character, who shows up, does something dickish, and then usually gets the shit beaten out of him.
In short
Malfoy in Fandom
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Malfoy in the Books 
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Now there are many reasons why we like Malfoy, some to do with his design (especially in the movies), the fact that Slytherin has the best color scheme (snakes are cool yo), our societies complicated feelings toward aristocracy, and the overall popularity of villians over heroes, the latter point could be its own video.  But I’m going to narrow in on three main points, which as an academic, I’m required by law to spell out to you before I explain them
Reader Rebellion and Slytherin’s appeal
Malfoy’s status as “the Bully” vs. his actual character
SHIPPING
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(trying too hard)
   See, part of the reason why people like Malfoy is because what I call “Reader Subversion”, basically when the audience rejects what the text is telling them to do.  The most obvious example is watching bad movies for fun, these movies want to be seen as serious or dramatic, and instead we are just laughing at how bad they are (The Dungeons and Dragons movie is one I recommend).  So when the narrative is telling us “Hate this character, look how unlikable we made him” its very tempting to just be like “Screw you, I’ll sympathize with the character”.  Another example of this in HP is the embrace of Slytherin, which at least memetically is tied with Ravenclaw for most popular house.  Its associated with sexiness, coolness, ambition, and cunning but frankly…those traits aren’t really on display in the books.  
(Slytherin in the Fandom)
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The vast majority of Slytherins we meet are…kinda stupid, just selfish cruel vindictive spoiled assholes who only care about protecting their status.  Its less sexy vampires, and more Trump administration entitlement.
(Slytherin in the books)
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 But because the books are telling us so much how bad this house is, how much they suck, how much they are the “bad guy house” it’s pretty tempting to reject the narrative and find reasons to like them.  Topic for another video, but I notice this is popular when the narrative is very obvious about how much we should hate an antagonist ,and when the antagonists are more annoying than actually threatening.  
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This instinct is especially important because that is one of the major themes of the book in the character of Snape.  Everything about the character is designed to make us dislike him, he is cruel, selfish, petty, vindictive, and is actively abusing his position of power to psychologically torment children.  He is given all the “bad guy” physical characteristics, he dresses in black, and pretty much does something dickish in every scene he is in.  And critically…he is the good guy.  The point the book is making is that even if somebody is a massive asshole, that doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t possess positive qualities.  This is arguably the main theme of the series, that people have more to them than we first imagine, we see this with Neville, the Crouches, Dumbledore, McGonagall, the Marauders, REB, Fudge, and Dudley all relate to this them.
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The inverse of Snape is James Potter, who is revealed to have been an arrogant bully (and incidentally my second favorite characters in the series).  Now this is a topic for another video, but I think that the greatest failing of the HP series is not really following through with this theme, for every character who learn more about, there are others who stay the same, Lilly Potter and Voldemort being the worse examples.  But this finally gets to the problem of Malfoy 
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See from the start Malfoy is coded as somebody who isn’t just a bad person, but also a simplistic one, he has a very clear role as a character, of “The Bully.”  Basically, the Bully exists to be a minor antagonist to the hero, and possibly embody the writer’s childhood issues.  This character is like the terminator of petty spite, he will go out of his way to make the protagonists miserable in the most needlessly cruel way possible.  They will relentless pursue fucking with the protagonists at the expense of even their own basic self-interest.  This is one of the most overdone, tired, and uncreative roles in fiction, I’ve always hated bully characters and I feel they make the problem of childhood bullying a lot worse because it doesn’t recognize where the instinct to bully comes from, and how complicated it is.  What the stranger in a ski mask is to understanding rape, so this character is to understanding bullying.  Bully characters exist to be generic antagonists, so they are almost anniversary awful.  The only examples I can think of who are good are Cordelia from Buffy…and Draco Malfoy.  
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Cause when you break it down, Malfoy has motivations, relationships, goals, ideals, insecurities enough to make a full character, or at least a resemblance of one.  He truly loves his family, he has some massive set of issues and he loves his family.  Its honestly kinda compelling how he like “yeah I’m going to be evil when I grow up” but that same wimpness that makes him less threatening to Harry is also his greatest virtue, he simply isn’t strong enough to be truly evil and that is kind of a good thing.  Honestly its sort of the anti-Neville, while Neville is a giant coward except when the chips are down and that is his greatest virtue, Malfoy acts tough until shit gets real and that is also his greatest virtue.  Cowardice makes him a better person, in contrast to Crouch or Riddle who are extremely brave and cruel.  
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Also when compared to his father, you realize Draco is basically desperately trying to be something he isn’t, a cross between a Lannister and a Bond villain and he just can’t quite manage it.  And his frustration with Harry comes in large part because Harry kinda has everything Malfoy desperately wants all without “earning it”.  Draco is obviously somebody who is pressured a great deal by his family to succeed and has a lot to live up to, and deep down doesn’t’ really think he is up to the task.  And as we see in book 6, he isn’t.  Harry meanwhile basically has what Malfoy wants the most without even trying, which makes Malfoy risk thinking about his own inability to live up to his father’s standards which leads him to lash out.  It isn’t a super complicated character but there is potential, which is never really explored in the books because Rowling doesn’t like him.  
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There is potential for a fully character there, and it honestly reminds me of Snape, we are given a character whose every action is coded bad but if we pay attention we realize there is more personality there than our initial impressions give credit for.  But unlike Snape, we don’t actually get rewarded for looking closer to Malfoy, if you pay close attention you realize there is more to him but the narrative basically doesn’t care about him.  The reader isn’t rewarded for taking the book’s advice and examining the character beyond the trappings of his presentation, which is one of the most frustrating experiences you can get as a reader, feeling all the work you put in was for nothing. And that frustration is, along with radiation poisoning, the greatest impetus for the creation of fanfiction, which is basically the result of stories cockblocking the audience.
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(did this happen in the movies I don’t even remember)
This goes to the shipping thing. Full up, I don’t ship Harry/Malfoy, in large part bceause of how much of Harry’s character is determined by his internal narration, and that to me disproves any indication that Harry likes Malfoy.  He spends so little mental energy on Malfoy, when ever he encounters him he is like “oh yeah that guy is a shit..I bet he likes Thatcher” but when Malfoy isn’t on screen Harry doesn’t really care, he has more important things to worry about like being British and having a shockingly high pain tolerance.  The only time when Malfoy seems to occupy Harry’s thoughts its the 6th books, and only when there is a plot reason, and in the 7th he doesn’t care again.  Compare this to how he thinks about Cho Chang, where he spends mental energy on her even when she isn’t on screen.  Harry just doesn’t care.
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BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
Malfoy does.  Malfoy over the course of the book goes dramatically out of his way to fuck with Harry Potter, he dramatically inconveniences himself in order to fuck with Harry.  in the first book he sneaks out at night to try to fuck with Harry Potter for its own sake and gets caught for it.  He dresses up in dementor robes to mess with him, he waits in hallways to make fun of him, he designs a bunch of badges to mock him, like Malfoy seemingly goes out of his way to fuck with Harry above and beyond the norm.  So...why
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(I”M AN ADULT)
Well the actual reason is that Malfoy is the Bully character and that is what Bullies do, which is why bullies in fiction are often so boring and don’t resemble real life bullies, who are much closer to Snape or James Potter.  But this doesn’t work with Malfoy because the character is just well written enough that you have to ask “wait why is this guy acting so obsessed”
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(WTF is he doing in this shot?)
And that is where some of the shipping comes from.  Its not necessarily true, since you could just read it as Malfoy being super insecure and envious, but you could easily also read it as just “Malfoy has a crush on harry and is a shithead”  Repressed homosexual lust is as good explanation as many for his weird fixation on Harry.  It certainly makes more sense than “he is just evil” which 
seems to be the canon.  
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TLDR, Malfoy is interesting because the writer seems to actively dislike him and dismiss him like the Tory punk that he is, but the fandom loves him so much that they have turned him into a whole new character the reason why is that he is just well written enough to be intriguing but has no follow through.  
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Also who names their kid Scoripus Hyperion Malfoy jesus christ this guy is the Jacob Rees Mogg of the HP series.
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cclaudias · 7 years ago
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For those people that think Lotor will get and/or deserves a redemption arc or ship him with the paladins
I’m tired of all the hate and discourse on this fandom, so this isn’t me calling anyone out but I’m just going to explain why that is wrong.
Before I go into this, I wanted to clarify Lotor’s age. I’m not entirely sure about his age and don’t want to delve into that too deep, but by looks alone it’s pretty clear that Lotor is not below 18. He might simply be 18 or older but he’s definitely not under. Though to be fairly honest, given his character designs, the fact he had four personal generals who were obviously not related to him otherwise (besides the fact they were part-galra) they weren’t his family friends or anything so he undoubtedly must have spent time choosing them (we know he had “goals” and he’d need good generals for that). So I’m guessing Lotor’s probably around Shiro’s age. But he could be centuries older than that, since his parents are so old. Also, they’re zombies and I’m not sure zombies can reproduce... 
So getting into what this post is about in the first place. 
The first argument I’ve seen from people is Lotor’s background. Because he came from an “unloved” background, with negligent parents who were more invested in war. 
Frankly, this would make a very valid and good argument. If Lotor was a teen or child. But like I’ve already established HE’S NOT. Again, I know that 18 yo’s aren’t very adult-like, but then again, he grew up in a war background, he would have that kind of a mental maturity, if not emotional. But I’m pretty sure Lotor’s emotionally mature too but I’ll come back to that later. But even if not enough EM Lotor should know the difference between right and wrong. He’s not an idiot. Unless that’s your argument than ofc, idiots do deserve an enlightenment arc.
And please don’t argue with me otherwise, that his upbringing would make his an asshole who thinks it’s okay to harvest life energy out of living beings/sustainability sources for living beings. I grew up in a very Indian background. I grew up around people who think that LGBTQ+ phobia is valid; around racists and sexists. But I’m not one of them. Given my background, I could argue that it would be okay for me to be an asshole but it’s not. Yes, your background and upbringing gives you a starting point but does not make up your personality. This isn’t only me I’m talking about. There are millions of people out there who were brought up in a fascist background, but they’re amazing people because that’s who they chose to be. Your upbringing only has so much of a say in your character, especially as you grow. 
Lotor harvesting quintessence is very clearly not for any good. The universe - or other universe - does not need life energy sucked out of it to become a better place. He’s obviously doing it for some twisted, sick, selfish plan. Lotad has obviously spend a lot of time researching on his mother’s ways and her “destroyed” experiment, and that requires a lot of time, hard work and investment that he chose to put into something doubtlessly evil.
The next thing is that his “friends” betrayed him. 
To begin with, Lomor and his generals weren’t friendly at all. Now before you argue that they were friends and blah, blah, blah let’s go over their dynamics first. The first time we saw Lotide ordering his generals around leading, he was literally only sitting in one place and giving them orders. If they were friends -  or if he considered them equals - he would have at least had the decency to stand with them, like Shiro does with the rest of the team. Shiro considers the team his comrades, his command but also his family. His friends. Even in the flashback we were given of the Paladins of the Old, Zarkon stood with the rest of his team, because yes, he was their leader, their commanding officers, but they were his friends, so he stood by them, with them. But whenever we’ve seen Lotar and the generals he’s always separated from them:
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Not only that, the first time Latod went to fight the paladins, he went alone. He wasn’t really taking the fight seriously, so he didn’t feel the need to include the generals in it because that would mean explaining it all to them and “commanding” them around. Also, he didn’t tell the generals about his plans earlier and that alone entirely eradicated the idea of them being “friends”. Because if they were friends he would have told them this. If they were friends the generals would have noticed that he was working on something he’s keeping from him, but they were all very clearly surprised when they found out. If they were friends, he might not have told them the entire thing but at least would have given them an idea of his plans, since he seemed very obviously excited about them. If they were friends, he wouldn’t have killed Narti. Especially not so nonchalantly. 
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He didn’t even fucking care that he killed one of his generals.
Now that I’ve established that they’re not friends, I’m going to talk about one last thing: that Lotmar is doing this all because he wants familial “love”. Because he was a neglected child whose parents’ want his dead. Which makes all his misdoings okay apparently.
Yes, he was a neglected child, and he did crave love. [Keyword: did] The creators themselves have stated that he has a bit of a father complex. Yes, Lotre did grow up craving his parents’ love, acknowledgement and affection. Grew up. He’s grown up now.
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I wanted to just leave it here but
He clearly doesn’t expect anything from his parents anymore. We’ve seen how he’s like with his mom. He calls her hag, witch and has no respect for her. If he was still naive enough to expect anything from his mom, we’ve seen him for 2 seasons now, I think they would have included something that was supposed to make us sympathize with him. If the creators wanted us to feel sorry for Lotouche, they would have at least made this scene look a little different. Idk, like maybe have Lotor’s smile fade a moment, have a genuinely sad expression and then carve into s smirk. But no, he simply walked away doing that.
I don’t think the creators wanted us to sympathize with him. He was supposed to be a good villain. Not good good. But evil good. Zarkon only used brute force to settle everything he wasn’t a good villain for the plot line. This dude thou, he’s been through a lot and he’s cold, but calculating. He seems like a good leader but is really a shitty backstabbing snake who is smart enough to manipulate his victims/subjects.
And if the creators really intended to give Lotass a redemption arc, they wouldn’t have ended the scene with this look on his face:
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This - is not the face of someone who’s worthy of a redemption arc.
And please stop shipping him with the paladins. My babies deserve the world, not a fucking snake. He’s a villain and no falling in love with one of the paladins will not change everything he’s done. Besides, my babies would never fall for Lodick, so it wouldn’t make sense to ship them anyways. Yes, he saved Keith, but he also killed one of his generals without hesitation or an ounce of regret. He does not deserve Keith or any of the paladins.
I hope you understood why even my 7 yo brother hates this dick now. Plus, let’s not forget the scene he was introduced in: the way he lied to a Galran general by behaving like an amazing, forgiving leader in front of thousands. He didn’t only betray the general, but cheated every one present that day. 
tl;dr: Prince Lotasshat is a backstabbing, lying, deceiving, ruthless, selfish, cunning, bratty dipshit and seriously does not deserve any of your sympathy.
Edit: I saw a lot of misunderstanding in the notes, so I wanted to clarify a few things:
But first, before y’all call me out on what I’ve tagged this post with, can you please read the rest of the fucking tags???
1. I was not calling you out for liking Lotor.
You’re allowed to like a villain (ofc not if the villain is entirely fucking messed up… because that would be messed up). I appreciate a lot of villains too. Because some villains were made villains, some are intelligent and make you really appreciate the story, the creators, the writers, etc, some of them are the only thing that keeps the story alive and others make you question the definition of “good” and “bad” and how strong the line differentiating them really is. There are villains that are so well written, makes you question what you’ve believed till date.
I mentioned this in the beginning of the post but I’m reiterating it again: this was not a call out post. I was not calling anyone out for liking Lotor, but reminding you to stop de-villainizing him. Reminding you that Prince Lotor is a villain, has hurt, offended, cheated, betrayed and even killed people and he therefore is a VILLAIN.
2.    This wasn’t really about ships but I needed to make this clear so I added it. I know a lot of you believe in the “ship and let ship” thing but Lotor is a bad person and shipping a bad guy with the good guys is not okay. I know this happens in other fandoms too, but that doesn’t make it okay.  He’s painted a villain, bad, for a cause and it definitely isn’t for people to romanticize that. 
A romantic relationship with someone like this will be abusive and unhealthy and that will never be okay. And by abusive and unhealthy, I don’t mean it has to be physical. It doesn’t have to be entirely emotionally scarring either. It can be little things like that bullshit jealousy trope that is not healthy. It could be distrust, forcing your feelings, friendship onto someone, it can be fear or discomfort with your lover. Like in so many relationships and these tropes people are afraid to show embarrassing parts of themselves to their lovers because they put them up on some pedestal. But that isn’t healthy or “romantic and cute”.  Your lover needs to be one of your best friends, someone you can trust. We know that the paladins don’t like or trust this guy. I don’t understand how people romanticize this???
This is all I have for now, but seriously people, I’m not calling you out or insulting you. I’m just telling you to think before you jump into shipping characters. Think about what the characters are like, their individual personalities, their relationships with each other, at the moment. Eventually if things feel safe, if it seems like these people could be in a healthy relationship you can ship it then (except I don’t really see this happening with Lotor, I’m certain he’s not getting a redemption arc, this was just to be safe with other ships).
I don’t know if you’re going to consider this offensive, rude, arrogant or whatever, but I wasn’t trying to insult anybody, not before I properly explain everything to them. This is what I did in this post. Not calling others out.
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earwaxinggibbous · 7 years ago
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“Congratulations” VS. “Started From The Bottom”
Started as a bottom, now my whole team’s fuckin’ rears.
Self-aggrandizing rap and hip-hop anthems have existed since the genre was invented. It’s just a really nice, friendly way of saying, “hey! I’m better than you.” Generally speaking, whoever is on the track should have the power and clout behind them to make all of the bragging seem warranted. A great example is Eminem’s Rap God, which has a chorus that literally has Eminem saying he’s beginning to feel like a rap god. And we buy it, because hell, Eminem basically IS a rap god. Regardless of how you feel about him, especially as a person, there’s no arguing that his flows and style require an insane amount of skill. (Or at least, they used to.)
The other big rule, once again using Rap God as an example, as that the song should actually be good. Because if you’re bragging about being the coolest rapper with the most chains and bitches while rapping like complete shit, your point is pretty much moot. When Eminem speed-raps in Rap God, it’s essentially the proof that he is in fact the man named in the title. 
There’s only one real problem with these songs when it comes to audience reception: They’re not relatable to anybody except other rich rappers and musicians. Which can be kind of a problem since that’s not really who the music industry is aiming to please. So in somewhat recent times we’ve been getting a different flavor of self-aggrandizing rap. Songs that, instead of saying “I’m super great”, they say, “Hey, I started from humble beginnings and worked my way to the top, and now I’m super great”. Which gives us viewers the idea of this sort of achievable dream that is nearly within arm’s reach.
Enter two very, very different hip-hop artists, at two very different times.
Drake and Post Malone, in my opinion, are both pretty good, in my opinion.
Let’s start with Drake. Drake feels at least a little more like a “real rapper” than Post does. Maybe because he was on Young Money, or because he doesn’t have that sing-songy flow that Post does, but he just feels more like somebody I’d describe as a rapper. If I had any reason, I’d say it’s because Post Malone’s music, even his ego-boosting shit, tends to sound stoned or morose the bulk of the time. Drake’s voice isn’t much fun either, but at least I can believe his ego based on his vocal tones alone. Post has a tendency to sound really, really sad, or just super high.
Now one might say, “Panda, you can’t compare these two songs. Started from the Bottom precedes Congratulations by four years.” But the reason I’m making this comparison is that, despite Drake being considered the superior artist by nearly everyone, Congratulations is basically the better version of its predecessor. 
Let’s discuss this.
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Now for one thing, I fucking hate the music video of Started from the Bottom. Not because it’s that bad, though depicting “working at a drug store” as “the bottom” is pretty fucking stupid, the video itself does a pretty good basic job at getting across what it wants. I just hate the skit.
I remember pulling up the song on YouTube and thinking, Jesus, this song is 5 fucking minutes long? Half the lyrics are just the title. Relax, past Panda, one minute of that video is a stupid skit that shows up randomly before the second chorus. A full fucking minute of two of Drake’s coworkers, not even Drake himself, but two of his coworkers at Duane Reade or something ogling some woman who’s checking out of the store. It’s not funny, it doesn’t really add anything, and the two guys can’t act. Drake’s body language is awkward and goofy in the music video, I doubt he’d be a great actor either, but that’s fine, he’s just the guy who made the song. Most of what he needs to do is lipsync along to the track and wave his hands around anyway. But the two guys are in a skit, an acted skit that requires acting to happen, and they suck.
It doesn’t help that it’s interrupting what is already one of the most monotonous songs that the lord hath graciously dumped on top of our collective consciousness like a weighty cow turd. The video actually tries to help the song by making it look like Drake really did work a crappy job with a bunch of assholes and was raised in a shitheap. But this isn’t true.
And I hate bringing the lives of artists into their music more than anything. Because ever since really getting into Eminem’s works, I’ve been seeing every musician’s persona as a character. Now some musicians characters, like say, Mary Lambert, are very close to their real-world self, or even identical. Others, like David Bowie or the aforementioned Eminem, are essentially entirely different people offstage. Then there’s incredibly creative people like ThatPoppy who sort of blur the difference between a musical persona and the person behind it. And honestly I find that way more interesting than ripping into an artist personally. (Unless it’s Taylor Swift.)
But Started from the Bottom is an argument against critics who don’t believe Drake ever really suffered or understands the lower class. And I’ve read about him, so I can say that he should. He wasn’t living in a complete shithole, generally Canadian shitholes are better than American ones, but he still dealt with a parental divorce, bullying due to his race and Jewish upbringing, and having to see his father arrested. But there’s two issues once we reach this point.
One. This song never mentions any of that. And two. After dropping out of school he got a TV job to act as a main character on Degrassi. And since this song isn’t about his childhood, I can only assume it’s looking back on his days as a working-class young adult.
NO, Drake. BAD hip-hop artist.
Being an actor on a TV sitcom is not the bottom. Not to mention that even when he left to start making music, he essentially had his career set. Once you’re an actor on television, if people watched your shit, you can almost definitely get a job in music afterwards. It worked for Miley, Demi, Ariana, and Selena, there’s no reason it wouldn’t have worked for Drake. Not to mention that he got picked up by Young Money, which is essentially a free win for anyone who’s better and more interesting than sentient iguana man Li’l Wayne. (Which was surprisingly rare, apparently. Where the fuck is Gudda Gudda’s next single, Wayne?!)
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Yes, Drake, we know you weren’t rich. That doesn’t mean you were at the bottom. I live in a comfortable apartment in Midtown and my mom works a law firm, and we don’t even call ourselves rich. “Not being rich” is different from “the bottom”. “The bottom” is only owning hand-me-down underwear, living in a downturned umbrella and eating dirt for nutrients. 
But lyrically this song doesn’t tell you anything. All the stuff I know about this guy is just from Lyric Genius and Wikipedia. 
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Wow, you only argue with your mom once a month?
Lucky bastard.
Also, really quickly I wanna comment on the uncle line for a second. “The keys” are specifically to his drop top Lexus that young Drake was borrowing. I don’t think you need me to say that people who are on “the bottom” don’t tend to own convertibles. 
And, like, rich people work at night and get in traffic too. Just because you’re in a limousine doesn’t mean there’s no traffic. It’s just slightly more enjoyable traffic. 
And then Drake just spends the rest of the song essentially sucking his own dick without expanding on his hardships, which was supposed to be the point of this track from the beginning. And I don’t get the whole “no new friends” thing he always says, this isn’t the only song he’s said it in. Drake, unless you’re gonna tell me that the entirety of Young Money and several other well-known rappers went to high school with you like some kind of wacky rap music-based sitcom, I’m pretty sure you’ve made some new friends. Either that or your obvious baby crush on Nicki Minaj is painfully laced by inconceivable amounts of mistrust.
So you’re either a paranoid asshole who just admitted to not trusting the people that got him into the game in the first place, or you’re a liar. Good to know!
Honestly this song makes me just kind of not like Drake as a person. Which is probably one of the worst things you can do as an artist. If you’re trying to make a song that allows people to sympathize with your plights or revel in your success, being this illegally unlikable while doing it isn’t helping your case in the slightest.
But honestly the worst part isn’t even the douchey lyrics, it’s just the song itself. It just feels like it goes on forever.
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(Pictured: A hook, apparently.)
The chorus itself is so repetitive I’d rather listen to fucking Come and Get It, Drake has a really bad habit of sounding literally bored to death, and the beat just sounds like a Future song jacked off on GarageBand. Lame snares and lame backing tunes. One whole piano key. Wow, Drake, you’re almost as good at playing physical instruments as your mentor.
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(Even he hates it.)
Sad to say the beat and production is probably the best part? Drake’s voice wrecks what was already a weak beat. Whenever he wants to be self-aggrandizing he just sounds fucking bored. Like the most self-aggrandizing thing about it is the fact that he doesn’t think he needs to actually try. In fact, The Motto (YOLO) had the exact same problem. I actually prefer that song. The beat still isn’t high art, but it’s got a little more snap to it. Kind of reminds me of Sage the Gemini’s Gas Pedal, which falls into the category of songs that aren’t that great but can be danced to if put on the setlist. 
But this? It’s no fun. A hard 1 out of 5, and that’s only because its attempted premise was almost salvageable. But all I really got out of this song was that Drake is an asshole, he went to school with Lil Wayne apparently, his mom is really really nice since they only argue once a month, and he should just go back to desperately wishing his girlfriend would call him on his cell phone. You’re way better at being sad than--
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Fucking... goddamnit.
Now Post Malone is kind of... different. In many ways. One time he said he doesn’t write rap music, and while normally I’d attribute that to him being a pussy who’s too afraid to contribute to what is and has always been a predominantly black genre and racism and he secretly doesn’t wanna be associated with them or whatever. But honestly I’m inclined to give Post Malone some leeway because really, he’s a singer. He makes notes. He’s singing with a hip-hop flow and occasionally has actual rap guests who... honestly end up doing a similar thing on his tracks. (In this case, it’s Quavo! Hurray!)
Oddly enough I actually went through a few songs to compare this to before settling on Drake. I considered Cheap Thrills, as they both sort of follow a similar concept of ‘today’s a good day, let’s go clubbing with only three bucks in our collective pockets’. Decided not to because really Cheap Thrills could be more accurately compared to a myriad of other songs. Considered White Iverson, his first single, but decided they didn’t really have enough in common to use it. I had options.
Really the only reason I went with this is because Congratulations succeeds in every place that Started From The Bottom fails.
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Rather than attempting to detail Post Malone’s past suffering, it moreso discusses the actual rise to fame. And alllll the people who said he couldn’t do it.
Beatwise this one outclasses Drake’s already. I remember reading critics describing Started’s beat as “haunting”, which was apparently a good thing. I don’t get it. Congratulations, on the other hand, is carried by a sort of stoned, laidback tempo. Really speaks to the whole idea of “hey, we worked really hard, our album dropped, and now we can take a break and have some fun!” 
Honestly if Post Malone wrote more songs like this and less straight-up luxury porn/self-aggrandizing rap like White Iverson or rockstar. (I feel like I’m a minority in not really minding either one of those songs.) Also I must say that Post Malone seems to be really good at picking guest artists. On rockstar he has 21 Savage, whose big thing is that he’s gangsta and shoots people and don’t fuck with him, which at least fits into the attempted tone. (Honestly Sav fits better on that song than Post does.) And in Congrats, we get Quavo.
Not only do Quavo and Post sound really good together on this, as their vocal range seems somewhat similar implying some kind of bro-type unity shit. Honestly this song gives me more band vibes than rockstar does, albeit a very different kind.
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You know, you just started your band, you’re waiting to hit it big, you’ve put in all this effort with barely any money, you’re living in a shitbag apartment with 4 other sweaty dudes and you all have to sleep together and Quavo keeps rolling over and shoving his nuts in your face. It’s completely garbage and your drummer has to whore himself out for money, you accidentally get paid for a gig in beer tickets like in that one episode of Metalocalypse, and then finally, FINALLY, you drop a tape that hits big. You get on TV, you meet a record exec, and you’re calling your mom during the afterparty and you’re all celebrating because it’s been so LONG since you could just have a BREAK and now everybody’s SAUCIN’.
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EXACTLY.
The lyrics work perfectly for this, but not only that, it’s to show all of the naysayers who insisted they couldn’t do it. All the haters who are now suddenly super gung-ho about how they used to be friends with Post Malone even though they actually shoved him in a locker literally every day. This somehow manages to be super-laidback and super-hype at the same time, which seems to be Post’s general style. Candy Paint has sort of a similar feel. That’s also a fucking great song. I love Post Malone. There. I said it.
But the biggest difference between these two songs is that I somehow get some feeling that Post Malone started somewhere. When I hear Congratulations, I feel like he actually had to put in some effort to get where he is. His first big hit only even got released because somebody leaked it. Nobody was ever expecting it to be as big as it is. Stoney in general is an insanely personal album, and it all feels surprisingly honest for the genre despite the drops of luxury porn and self-aggrandizing. 
Basically, TL;DR: Drake cares more about the destination than the journey. Post gives us both the conflict and they payoff. Drake’s beat lacks texture or purpose, whereas Post manages to meld his melodic voice with a smooth backing track. Also, Post occasionally bothers with wordplay! Lyricism in a melodic rap song? Who would’ve thought?
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Hell, it even manages to fix the “no new friends” idea displayed by Drake by sort of re-interpreting it as “no fake friends”.
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And fuck, I almost forgot to mention Quavo.
Oh Quavo. Your verse may be short, severely lacking in punchlines and technically mediocre, but you just... you sound good. You sound good with Post. Somehow Post fucking Malone manages to totally outclass one of the Migos on this track. But Quavo does pretty well. I kinda like the “Huncho Houdini” line and a few of the football puns. In the end his verse is a little too short to really judge as anything more than decent.
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(Also, the music video is great.)
But yeah, who would’ve thought this white stoner with braided sideburns would manage to completely slam Drake, the god of the late 2010′s? I’m honestly tempted to give this thing a 5 out of 5, but due to a few not-rhymes that nearly slip past due to Post’s mild drunken slur, I’d have to drop it into a 4.5/5. Still, I love this song. I love this song, I love Post Malone, fuck it. Judge me if you want. I have yet to hear a Post Malone song I don’t like.
Which I guess doesn’t mean much since he only has an album and an LP out, but...
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It’s more than can be said for Drake at this point.
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knightofbalance-13 · 7 years ago
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Welcome to Reality
http://dudeblade.tumblr.com/post/165307951521/is-remnant-stupid
How many times are we gonna go over this?
First, let’s do the big stuff.
Almost all of which will bite you in the ass.
All abusers should not exist. They shouldn’t exist in the real world, but the reason they shouldn’t exist in Remnant is because abuse breeds resentment, fear, sadness, and hurt. Emotions that we are told would attract grimm. Why would an abuser do this if the risk of a giant murder bird coming in to eat you is likely?
Because Grimm would hunt down the people being abused and the abusers are psychopaths so they aren’t a target. Likewise, why should they abuse someone when they could get killed in their sleep? because human beings and our reality isn’t rational so why should Remannt be any more rational than our world?
Racism shouldn’t exist. Much like abusers, it really shouldn’t exist in the real world, but in this world, racism would breed resentment, fear, sadness, envy, and hatred. Why do that if doing that to an entire minority race would cause a giant armored gorilla to come by and rip you in half Mortal Kombat style?
Why would you devalue someone because of their skin color in real life? Because you’re irrational and things like that don’t apply to irrational people.
Shrinks should be more valued than Hunters. I mean, it would be better to PREVENT the grimm from coming in the first place with some good psychology rather than having a bunch of glorified exterminators kill them off? What, do these guys not understand what attracts grimm? I’d rather have my emotional issues be solved rather than have it build up so that a two-headed snake can try to digest me.
Because Grimm are only ATTRACTED to negative emotions and they’ll still attack people. Not to mention Shrinks don’t always work and people won’t always admit to having problems or needing a shrink despite the emotional problems this will cause because PEOPLE ARE NOT RATIONAL, especially the people you are explaining.
Now for the little stuff.
Which will bit you the ass even moreso. Yes, it is possible.
Cardin would have been morally right if he had just outed Jaune from the beginning. Jaune’s lack of experience and competence is not only putting himself in danger, but his whole team as well. I don’t give a shit if he’s a “Good Tactician™” or whatever, but Jaune’s lack of combat abilities would get him and his team killed sooner rather than later. Instead, Cardin bullies Jaune, which leads me back to my rant on how this would breed resentment yadda yadda yadda You know the drill by now
Of course: Everyone not Jaune right, Jaune wrong. Excluding the fact that the same can be said for Ruby and her reckelssness and her immaturity and her lack of experience and amplified by her sister Yang being around as well as her uncle and especially her father constantly worrying about them being killed like SUmmer but I don’t hear you saying that at any point.
Jaune is in the wrong for melting that stuff down to upgrade himself. Instead of going to my usual tirade though, I have a screenshot of how I perceived Jaune’s actions that’s from another post of mine here.
I also have a post I cvan reference (http://dudeblade.tumblr.com/post/163800343229/i-hate-jaune) proving any opinion you have on Jaune is disbarred due to bias against him personally and any opinion on any male characters disbarred due to sexism.
Follow-up Question: Why does nobody think about Pyrrha’s parents?
Because if they are so stupid to have lost all of their daughter’s stuff while she was gone, so selfish they sold it or so blind they didn’t think to keep anything then they don’t really deserve it.
Qrow calls his own niece either “a Liar, Crazy, or both” when she was tricked into kneecapping Mercury. Real Uncle of the year material there, Qrow. What’s next? - You use your other niece as bait for a deadly agent of Salem - Oh wait that actually happened. Why are the adults all assholes in this world?
A. He was stating teh proof that was there and there is no otehr rational explanation.
AndB. He clearly didn’t know about Tyrian. Although has a dick so it should be obvious you would try to portray as bad.
Ironwood doesn’t take Weiss into child custody. He’s seen what pressure Weiss is under in her own home. Winter has surely told him about what Jacques does to them to keep the family under his thumb. Why doesn’t he take action? - He has two seats on the council, it shouldn’t take that long, and considering that child abuse might breed negative emotions… Well, you saw my comments about abuse earlier in this post.
Except Jacques is the richest man in Mistral and there is nothing saying that Ironwood has authority over child services and if he failed, Weiss’ abuse gets worse. Also, how does Ironwood know? He has never been in the same room as when Weiss and Jacques talk, Jacques is subtly abusive in public and people don’t exactly talk upfront about this.
Ozluminati sends the drunkard whose semblance is BAD LUCK to guard a person of importance. Was Ozpin TRYING to get Amber killed? I mean, you can’t have a person with super speed to guard Amber so that if she gets in trouble, the guard can rush in to save them? You can’t have a sniper keep watch from a distance, and pick off opponents who would kill her? Why the drunkard whose semblance is the causation of bad luck to those around him?
A. Because Glynda is teaching in one of the most, Ozpin is running a school, Ironwood is running a school AND a miltary and Leo is runn9ing a school. Qrow literally has the most time.
B. Who is this person with super speed? Can they be trusted? Are they stronger than Qrow? Can a sniper be trusted and would a sniper be effective due to Aura? See, you don’t answer YOUR questions.
C. Wow Dudeblade, I thought you were critical bt you’ll take Qrow haing bad luck at face value when any evidence for this is cirtcumstantial at best? ALmost like you only do it to bitch about it.
Winter should have taken Weiss away from Jacques. Winter knows full well what her father can and will do to Weiss. Why doesn’t SHE take Weiss away from Jacques? She’s got the power to do so! She’s a legal adult, she has a high rank in the military, she can afford Weiss’ living expenses! Why can’t Winter help out her sister? Is she selfish or something?
Because Jacques is richer, more powerful in a legal systemn, could manipulate Winter since he also abused her and Winter has nio proof. You know, like how child abuse works in real life.
Why didn’t Ilia just pass “Color Change” as her semblance? - It probably wouldn’t have been that hard,and she could have offhandedly mentioned that maybe, a faunus once saved her life once when she was younger so that she could have an excuse to sympathize with them? - This makes no sense at all as to why she couldn’t have kept her cover better. For a chameleon, she does an awful job of blending in.
No, you just don’t pay attention: You cannot accidentally activate a Semblence and Illa’s color change is inherent in CHAMELOENS as a sign of EMOTION: This shit isn’t a Quirk, stop acting like it is.
Why do Raven and Qrow play the Pronoun Game? All Qrow had to say was either “Yes” or “No” to Raven’s question,and she would have answered his. But no. Mr. “I’m using my niece as bait” has to try to take the moral high ground over Raven and lecture her about ‘family’ and crap. While, y’know, USING RUBY AS BAIT!
A. You’re lying and trying to paint a MASS MURDERER as a good guy.
B. Raven was also dancing around teh subject and used her own daughter as leverage and unlike you, I can provide proof in the fact that Raven never visits Yang, outright spat in her face and only pressed Yang when she could be used to control Qrow.
C. So...why aren’t you criticizing Raven for mass murdering people and abusing her daughter? Let me guess: She has a vagina and thus your sexist ass ignores her.
RNJR doesn’t take any kind of transport to Mistral because of reasons. Despite the fact that they’re trying to get to Mistral ASAP to warn them. And since Ren and Nora decided to NOT say something like “Hey, this place is dangerous, we should find a different way around or get through as quick as we can.” Then they waste a bunch of minutes against the Nucklevee. With his stupid noodle arms, and ability to make buildings and other structures relocate themselves. Maybe that’s how it killed other, more experienced hunters. Whenever one of them found cover, Nucky would use it’s structure relocation powers and make that cover disappear.
A. https://youtu.be/IZKpkzPIRlw?t=16m42s
B. Trama nor is it shown that the Nucklevee was near by until it was heading towards Kuroyuri and they were informed about the Nucklevee.
C. ANy proof it can do that? Becuase not only is this a baseless accusation, this has no point in what you are saying. Of course, peopel could give you teh benefit of the doubt...but between your apparent sexism and you’re lying: It’s safe to assume you said this because the writer’s are male and you wanna put in Ad Hominin.
Salem only sends one goon after the dreaded “Silver-Eyed Warrior.” She has a guy who gave her a tough time when all he was doing was stalling, a person who can alter one’s perception, a bunch of other fighters, and an army of grimm at her beck and call. Goddamn villain stupidity.
A. Gee, not like they killed those so called “dreaded” warriors before...
https://youtu.be/IZKpkzPIRlw?t=3m45s
Huh, almost like you ignore facts to suit your narrative.
B.  What other fighters? Mercury and Emerald would be fucked against RNJR due to their new abilities, everyone else is doing their own work: What “fighters” are you referring to? And the Grimm? Why not wlak up to Ozpin and his allies and say “HERE”S THE TRHEAT I’M TRYING TO ELIMINATE”?
C. Yeah...this is just like getting a hold of the world’s most powerful warrior, having her in the palm of your hand and the  not doing anything Oh wait, Korra did that. ALl the fucking time. And I do believe that in Storm Hawks, Piper has let t5he main villianess go due to their bonds before.Yeah, almost like youy are setting an unaturally high bar for RWBY.
Darwin. Award.
Every single person in Remnant is gunning for a Darwin Award. Like, only our ‘main’ protagonists are somewhat smart, and even then, Blake thinks that just putting on a disguise is going to distract from the fact that she shares the same last name as a previous WF leader.
Everyone on Remnant is an idiot.
Just like our world where the examples you pull exist here. And whil;e you can point at Grimm, I can point at Dust and Aura and the three would counterbalance each other. So Remnant is no more unrealistic than our world with the same flaws and the same actions. ALmost like humans can’t remove themselves from their own experiences and being is the ENTIRE POINT OF A SHOW.
God, no wonder you suck at writing: You’re too obsessed with faulty logic.
Either that, or the writers are making this up as they go along. But that would be insulting the original writers. And we can’t be critical of people who are ‘trying.’
Yeah, lying and being sexist and being bias and setting unnatural high standards and ignoring facts is not being critical. My proof: This entire post.
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kyojuuros · 8 years ago
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Chapter 93
aka I finally formed a connection with the new warrior kids
So all in all this was a good chapter! I had to take pause several times for several reasons. Pieck is Best Girl™ and I think that was one of my stronger initial responses to the chapter. I want more of her. And I finally think I’ve found a care for characters like Gabi, Falco and Colt. I’m not feeling so bitter about being away from the main cast for so long. Still, I will be happy when we return to them. 
I’m just going to break this down into parts to keep my thoughts more organized. I also have some things to say about Ymir and how she was handled, and I don’t think my opinion is the popular one (lol), but I think I will save that for last. Also I am basing this off of this translation. I have not the patience to wait for Crunchyroll right now, but I will be checking that out when it’s released. 
More under the cut. 
Hannibal The Marshall
So this guy is hugely dependent on the titan power and seems pretty distressed at the idea that Marley can’t rely on that power forever. It’s kind of shit to me how this guy is chill with persecuting an entire race of people for his own comfort but that seems to have been the Marley Way™ for a while now, so it’s expected. He even makes jokes about engineering a titan with wings for the inevitability that war will take place in the skies someday. Basically, this dude needs to get cut off before he takes everyone down with him. 
Although he does seem to understand the reality of the situation. They need to work on bolstering their military, as Magath pointed out that their navy was a huge hinderence to them during this war, as much of the war took place on the sea, it seems. 
Captain Magath
This guy is okay in my book for now. This is the same guy who allowed Gabi to take off her armband in chapter 91 and generally seems to have pretty open communication with his Eldian subordinates. He is the one who brings to light the fact that the titan power is dwindling and says they need to work on their military before the titans are completely obsolete. 
I enjoyed his banter with Zeke, how he fed into the titan ass commentary by joking that he wants to know everything down to the number of hairs that are on a titan ass. LOL Basically the gist of it is that he seems to be willing to put himself down on the same level as his subordinates. He encourages Zeke, telling him he did well in that meeting and discussing what Zeke might plan to do in Paradis over the next year. He seems to value Zeke’s opinions and insight. 
Later in the chapter, while Colt and the others are drinking and celebrating and making an awful lot of noise, a superior mentions something about going in their cart of the train and making them stop. Magath is the one who says not to, and to let them enjoy this night. 
Basically, if you’re looking for your Eldian sympathizer (looking at you @kyojinofbraveos), I’m pretty sure that this guy is it. So, at this time he is cool as far as I’m concerned. 
My Boi Zeke
Zeke is getting a massive side eye from me right now. And I mean that in the most positive and amazing way possible. With the talk of Zeke being a child prodigy, and how the Marley government has never had any reason to doubt his sincerity, only to be met with the fact that he’s eager to get back to Paradis and is hiding the fact that he’s royal... this chapter has made it so clear that Zeke has his own agenda. I had wondered if Marley knew that he was royal, and this chapter all but confirmed that Zeke has kept this as his Big Fat Secret™ this entire time. I have no wonder, has he been brewing up a scheme ever since he was that child who sold out his parents? 
So Zeke’s spinal fluid seems to be the key ingredient to his ability to transform and control titans, even at night. It’s indicated this is only because he has royal blood, and is not an ability of the Beast Titan. So, I’m glad to have this confirmed, because after last month this is what I suspected. 
All in all, I’m really looking forward to whatever it is that Zeke has up his sleeve. I imagine that he really is not on either side. Not Marley, not Paradis, and just wants to figure out a way to end it all (or a massive power grab, but I really think it’s probably the former). 
From Zeke, I’m led to the next thing....
THE LEGENDARY ACKERMAN CLAN
A LEGENDARY SUB PRODUCT OF TITAN SCIENCE!!!!
A LEGENDARY SUB PRODUCT OF TITAN SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!
So many people have suspected this for a long time, that their bloodline has something to do with the titan power, and here all but confirms that to be the truth. Even the people outside of Paradis know about them. But they were only believed to be legends. I’m honestly so excited to get this revelation and I am really looking forward to getting some answers and having more elaboration on Mikasa and Levi’s power. 
My question is if they were created at the beginning when Ymir made a pact with the devil, or if it’s something that came along later down the line. What makes them immune to the mindwipe? And are they truly Eldian? So many questions! Please, Isayama, elighten me! 
That Zeke is pretty much pissing himself at the idea of seeing either of them again (well, he hasn’t even seen Mikasa yet, but I digress), also tickles me. lol Can’t blame him after his encouter with Levi. I sure wouldn’t want to be on Levi’s opposing side either. 
Reiner, Galliard and the New Warriors
So Reiner’s got some post-Shiganshina PTSD going on. He breaks my heart, and only continues to become more sympathetic to me. 
Galliard is a total dick to him and I really don’t think it comes from a place of love. While I believe that Reiner was probably close to Marcel, Galliard is another case, and I’m quite sure he harbors a lot of resentment to Reiner (and probably Bertolt, but what’s the point since.. ya know) and even if they were amicable in the past, I don’t think that will be a thing between them during this story. At the moment, Galliard is on my people I’m good without seeing again list. Bro, you have a really awesome titan form, but you’re a bag of dicks. Please get it together or I’m witholding your Loreal.
The revelation that Reiner’s Soldier Mode™ was most likely him just acting out Marcel’s behavior honestly broke me? His guilt not only comes from a place of ruining many lives of the people of Paradis and realizing they’re not the evil devils that he was taught they were, but it comes from a place where an old friend saved his life and he felt like he needed to compensate for that. It’s like Reiner was trying to fill in the gap that was missing because Marcel died. It makes me wonder how much more of a toll this took on Bertolt than we initially thought. Or how much of a toll it took on both of them when they realized Ymir was the one who ate Marcel. 
Reiner, I just want to give you a big hug. You deserved better. I will punch Galliard to defend your honor. 
On this note, Reiner seemed much more carefree around Gabi and the others. And I think for the first time in the manga we got to see him at his purest. He expressed great care for those kids and seems to want to look out for them. Soldier Mode Reiner wasn’t a complete lie. 
Oh yes, so there is the Reiner/Gabi/Falco love triangle in which Reiner is not an active participant. lol It’s funny. Gabi clearly has a crush on Reiner and admires him a lot. Falco clearly has a crush on Gabi. And he’s so clearly jealous of Reiner, telling him to go rest, getting angry with him for Gabi wanting his power. Falco, chill... You’re twelve. 
Reiner and Falco did have an interesting exhange though at the end. When Falco was acting like becoming a titan is really just a shit situation, Reiner knew he needed to get Falco to shut up before someone reported him for treason. Reiner of all people should know that getting the power puts you in a shit situation. You become a tool for Marley, and you basically lose your life. 13 years is a short life. But he makes Falco shut up the instant Falco implies that becoming a shifter isn’t what it’s chalked up to be so that he doesn’t get in trouble. He can see that Falco has a thing for Gabi, and uses that as leverage to inspire him to work harder to gain his power. Reiner also seems to want to protect Gabi from a dark future, although we’re still not too sure what she means to him exactly (he could just be playing big brother though which I think is likely). In short, I think Reiner really wants Falco to inherit the Armored Titan rather than Gabi. 
That being said, I don’t think the transfer of power will actually happen within the realm of the narrative. Reiner still has two years left, Zeke only has one, the story really needs to wrap up before their terms are over. 
And now the hard part. 
Ymir
So Ymir is dead, and this is the part of the chapter I really had to take pause at. I had been hoping for a long time that she would not have an off screen death. That she would still matter enough to at least get the respect of dying in a blaze of glory or something. And I was wrong. I think... Most of us were wrong. 
I sat there for a few minutes before I finally moved onto the next page. I had to take a breath and really absorb that Isayama did The Thing. 
I’m going to preface any future comments here with the fact that I love Ymir and she is one of my favorite characters. I am upset about her death, particularly by how she’s been dangling on a string in front of us this whole time. I wanted much more for her than what Isayama gave her. I wanted her to be as important as her name always implied her to be But I think this is where I start to split off from many others who have voiced their thoughts on the matter. 
Her death was hinted at as early as chapter 50, and in retrospect this should have been expected. I hate to sound like a blind Isayama supporter, but in this case I’m going to have to defend him and his writing. 
Galliard puts it perfectly, honestly. 
She was given a name that she could not live up to.
Ymir was never meant to be as important as we made her out to be. I think from the very reveal of her name we were lead to believe that she was some type of goddess, or princess, or anything that bears the weight of a Big Name Player on the chess board of Attack on Titan. 
The only Ymir that was ever meant to be a big deal was Ymir Fritz. 
That’s not to say that Ymir didn’t play important roles. She may still have a story yet to tell through Galliard. I’m particularly intrigued at the idea of what potential there is if Galliard is ever to come face to face with Historia. Will that trigger something fantastic? 
Ymir was there for Historia when no one else was. She sought out Historia because she related to her. In the end, she was the catalyst of Historia’s great character development that lead her to take the role of queen and by her own, determined choice. She gave Historia the courage to live as herself, to live with pride. Without Ymir, Historia would have given into the demands of her father. Ymir loved her greatly and it moved Historia so much that she realized she didn’t need to get the approval of anyone. Her life was hers. This is what Ymir taught her. 
Ymir’s character flaw is that she is just too damn kind. She masks it with banter and feigned disinterest, but she has always been sacrificial. From the time she was given a name and a role by a Grade A con artist, she grew to love the feeling of making other people happy. She played the role of Ymir, because it made others happy. Even when the man who took her in betrayed her, she continued to play that role, because she believed it would make people happy. She died for that. She was stoned and turned into a mindless titan because of that. 
When she awoke, she felt free, and she decided that her life was her own and she would live it as she wanted. That lead her to Historia, and I would argue those years with Historia were the best of her life, and exactly the way she wanted to live out her days. She saved Historia from herself, and I think that she was satisfied with that accomplishment. She would be thrilled to see what Historia has become today. I think she could die at peace knowing that she helped Historia learn how important it is to live for yourself. 
But despite her love for Historia, I’d argue she had overbearing guilt of taking the life of Marcel, even if it wasn’t particularly her fault. When she agreed to go with them, she knew she was going to die. She begged them to see Historia one last time because she knew this. She called herself a shitty person. She was almost willing to drag Historia with her for selfish reasons. And thank goodness Eren unlocked the coordinate or she never would have left Historia behind otherwise. Marley would have done the worst to her. 
She chose to save Reiner and Bertolt and it’s something that surprised even her, but in the end she was at peace with it, saying that it doesn’t feel so bad to be a goddess. Reiner offered her the chance to leave when they were on the wall at Shiganshina, and she opted not to, saying that she was just tired. She wanted to give the power back that she stole. This intent was clear when she left with them. And I believe she was already dead before they returned to Shiganshina. 
I think the mistake is that we all thought she had something up her sleeve so she could get away and continue living and find Historia again. 
She wrote to Historia, and in that letter declared she was basically marching to her death very soon. She says her one and only regret is that she was never able to marry Historia. And this is how her story comes to a close. Ymir lived a life that she was proud of, and chose to give it up to save two more people. Another mistake we made is believing that she was selfish. Her problem was quite the opposite. She was selfless to the core. 
I don’t think we’re done hearing about her. I’m sad she won’t be an active participant in the narrative again, but the fact that Galliard can recall her memories leaves me believing that we will still learn more about her, and may eventually see a better depiction of what happened after she returned with Reiner and Bertolt. 
I think this could have been handled better. But my defense for Isayama is that I really can’t figure out how he would have been able to give her an on screen death at this point. The time skip cemented that she would get an off screen death, and the idea that she was probably already dead before they returned to Shiganshina also cements that for me. He couldn’t have shown it earlier without revealing the biggest plot point in the series before he was ready to. Marley was not intended to be exposed before the basement. There was really no way around this. I just hope that he is able to do her more justice moving forward. 
I’m torn up over her, but I am trying to rationalize and process. I just hope... we’ll get more insight into her again, somehow. 
Predictions
I’m always bad at these. Next month will definitely be at least a final chapter of Marley perspective in order to wrap up the volume. I think after that we will pan back over to the main cast, so I’m holding out for July. I want to see what they’ve been up to the last three years, especially now after learning that they had sent a fleet of 35 ships over during the last few years that have never returned. I want to see Eren and Armin wrecking some shit. LOL
The war is coming. Zeke and Eren, I think, will be the biggest players out of everyone. And I hope that this is more than a hope, but I think moving forward we will finally get more revelation on the Ackerman issue. Hopefully the East Sea issue as well, but I’m slightly less optimistic about that. 
This was a good chapter. I know a lot of people are heartbroken. Just know I support you even if I think that ultimately it was a fitting death for Ymir, albiet handled a bit shaky. I understand there are those who were far more attached to her than I am. She still lives on in our hearts, and she will always be a part of the narrative, even if we have to backtrack to revisit her again. 
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junker-town · 6 years ago
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Couldn’t Be Me: Help, my brother is Steph Curry
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This week’s advice column is about sibling rivalries, and how to cope with being the lesser child.
Welcome to Couldn’t Be Me, a weekly advice column where I solicit your personal dilemmas and help out as best as I can. Have something I can help you with? Find me @_Zeets.
Whether your sibling is better than you at basketball — and gradually eliminating your team from the playoffs — or beats you in a video game, being bested by a sibling is tough for a lot of us. Siblings are the first people we compete against, and our rivalries with them run deeper and hotter than any others. That feeling of being second best can be hard to deal with, but it’s important to remember that beyond that rivalry can be an appreciation, a chance to celebrate someone close to you for being great at something.
This does not include a younger brother having a bigger penis, however. Don’t ask. You’ll see farther down.
Seth:
My brother and I have played basketball together since we were young. We both were pretty great at it back then, but as we got older, he quickly surpassed me in skill. The higher we rose, the greater the distance between the two of us. Now we’re playing against each other at the professional level, and it’s not even a fair competition. He’s more accomplished, more known and beloved, and so much better than me that one SB Nation writer once called me the store-brand version of him. Even though our parents try to support the two of us, I know deep in their hearts that they love him more. How could they not? I come off the bench and he’s probably going to win another championship. I know I should be happy for him, but I can’t help but feel envious and a bit small in comparison to him.
CBM:
It’s unfortunate, but history is full of siblings like you. The ones who are overshadowed. The lesser talented ones. You can find solidarity with the likes of Luke Hemsworth, Brett Harrelson, Neil Connery, Mychel Thompson, John Millsap, Zoran Dragic, and Taylor Griffin. Talent can be genetic, but sometimes it’s not divided evenly. You happened to wade into the talent when it was almost dry.
The problem is that you can’t be too bitter about this. Unless you want to go Cain vs. Abel, which I don’t think is the right route here. I think the best way to think when you’re the less talented sibling is the same way that every human in this culture of ours desperately needs to start thinking: that even though you two grew up playing against each other, and there’s forever a connection between the two of you, you’re not in direct competition with him. Your story is yours, and your duty is to improve yourself as much as you can. Celebrate your brother; his success should bring you as much happiness as your own.
Your goal is to do the most with what you have been given. Envy will always inhibits that.
Luis:
I was playing u14 [American youth soccer] and my little brother was playing for a gold club. One day we went to get new cleats. My brother grabbed the predators, I grabbed the f50s.
My dad made me put them back. He said to me, “when you play like your brother, I’ll buy you cleats like your brother.”
Martin:
This is about the first time my little brother beat me at FIFA.
Long story short, I am seven years older than my little brother. I obviously always beat him from the time he started picking up a controller to about the time I went to college.
I started playing less and he kept on playing a lot more, so by the time I’m 19-20 he’s super good. We play at this party with some other friends of mine, he beats me 1-0, and he was (obviously and understandably) over the moon.
I was mad, livid, he beat me in front of my friends, I swear I considered walking away or I don’t know, beating the crap outta him. But eventually I came around and saw things for what they were, my little brother had grown and it was very natural for him to be good at video games.
To this day he’s a fucking master. He plays Ultimate difficulty like it’s a walk in the park and I struggle with World Class.
CBM:
These two submissions are stories of younger siblings surpassing older siblings, and embarrassing them in the process. I have no consolation for Luis, since I was that younger brother who was better at the sport, and I can see myself in his dad. I can’t be wasting good money on nice cleats for someone who can’t honor them. It’s a cold world. You better bundle up.
For Martin, I sympathize. I believe deeply in embarrassing your younger sibling in video games. I believe that making them cry is a great way to build character. It’s a rite of passage to adulthood for them to know that the world, starting with their older sibling, can be merciless. That there are people out there who can be much better at something you love, and that all you can do is try your best, fail, cry, and get better.
I also know that the dynamic eventually reverses flow. That by showing the younger sibling no mercy, that you only set them on the path to destroy you eventually. I remember when my little brother and I played in a FIFA tournament that he won, beating me badly in the finals. I was livid. Perplexed. Flabbergasted. Something had to be wrong, either with the controls or with the order of the universe. I couldn’t believe it. As I was still grappling with this new truth, my little brother turned to me and quoted a line from one of his favorite animes: “Every warrior must fall. Your time is now.”
It be like that sometimes.
Julian:
When I was 19 and my brother was 17, I returned home unexpectedly from college to find him having sex in my room. It was bad enough to learn he got off on defiling my bed with a random scallywag, but even worse was before he noticed my presence I saw him pounding away, and he was putting in work.
To add psychological injury to insult, when he leaped up from surprise at my intrusion, I discovered he was packing a jumbo Mr. Plumpy below deck. My own fry was not supersized, so this was devastating. We have the same parents for God’s sake!
Up until then I’d held such an upper hand in the sibling dynamic. I was a successful athlete, and much better looking in the traditional sense. I was popular and dated a slew of beautiful girls throughout high school. But going forward it was clear to me that women wanted me on their arms while they wanted my brother in their beds.
I have a beautiful wife and three children now; my brother is still a bachelor at 35, and has dated a diverse array of women over the years, all of whom regard him with a fierce loyalty, like he is some sort of deity. I have always inspired adoration from women via kindness and decency. It kills me not to know what it’s like to inspire dedication and need simply through bestial prowess and lust. I’ve never talked to him about this, but this shit put a huge dent in my confidence. What the fuck am I supposed to do?
CBM:
Hey man, that’s some wild shit. Hold on, give me a minute to get over you calling your brother’s penis, “Mr. Plumpy.”
.
.
.
All right, then.
Penis envy is a terrible disease that has plagued the conscience of many men for no good reason. Men are usually more obsessed with the size of their penises than women are, and you shouldn’t have your confidence affected just because your brother may be an exceptional case. You’re not alone, however. Size has been socialized into a determinant of masculinity for eons.
But the biggest issue here is your idea that women are conquerable through sex. I understand that when you’re a young guy, that’s how sex is marketed towards you, and it’s easy to absorb that way of thinking. But as an adult you have to work to grow out of it. You are unabashedly reducing women to objects who you hope will follow and worship you because of your dick.
Women aren’t easily manipulated machines. You ought to know this; at least, I would hope you don’t view your wife this way. And yet, you hold onto this view regarding your brother’s relationships, then suggest that the size of his penis is all that matters. That is fiction created by a false perception of what sex, masculinity, and being a woman actually mean.
But yes, try not to think about your brother’s penis so much. Use that time productively and read The Second Sex or something.
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maxbronte · 8 years ago
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@reversecxpid // (Continued from here.)
“Yet, you give yourself the freedom to point fingers at possible suspects for all the Creeper performance”.
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“Gotta accept this was a good one, Bronte. You paid attention to Philosophy class. How long did it take you to come up with this? Were you awake all night trying to find the perfect way to roast my moral code, or are you as shallow as me to simply judge my beliefs for the little things you know? If the so-called truth is subjective, so is right and wrong, and who knows? Apparently to the eyes of the Creeper he’s doing right and we’re doing wrong. We work under the same code, if you think about it. We’re punishing those who we think should be punished, the fact that I decide to say it out loud and show my face just makes me look like a more honest person… or cynical, however you prefer to say it. It’s the same thing. I have WATCHED YOU, Maxine. I know you don’t think I’m plainly evil and bad, but I’ve killed more people than the Creeper has… apparently, yet you don’t feel as threatened with me. Why is that? Is it because I show my face? Is it because I left an odor bomb in your locker and that makes me more… Elementary-school-evil?”
“I’ve been considered an anarchist for going against the law, which is a simple bunch of sentences that is the base of our occidental society, but ANARCHY MEANS COMPLAINING WITHOUT SOLUTION, and I offer a solution. I AM THE SOLUTION. I’m not an anarchist, I’m liberal. People call me monster, but am I? I killed cheaters, pedophiles, rapists and murderers. The news may say the streets are safer without me, but they don’t stop to think that I wasn’t killing innocent people. I was killing those who deserved it. I CLEANED THE CITY better in three years than the police department in centuries. Society just punishes everything it doesn’t understand or goes against its code”.
“TRUTH is subjective. And so, I have my right to accept your words and try to do something to change my life around and become a better person –oh, sorry– a person accepted by the society, or I can continue with my deeds and believe in my own truth”.
“Nothing is true. Everything is permitted”.
He wasn’t supposed to hear that.
He wasn’t supposed to BE HERE. She made it a point to take this phonecall somewhere more private to express her concerns to Jimmy about the company he’s been keeping. She even made sure not to have this conversation in person so Jimmy wouldn’t realize she’s been drinking behind his back. And in retrospect, that drinking is why she didn’t notice there was someone else on this fateful garden perch.
             “ Jimmy, I--- I’ll talk to you later. ”
Phone's slipped sheepishly back into her pocket while she debates if she has the confidence to turn around and face The Rising Son.
Here’s the thing about Gabriel: he may be a bigger threat to her and everything she is and everyone she loves than The Creeper Himself. He would kill Sid. If he ever knew his big secret, about what Sid got away with, how he let someone else take the heat for the crimes he committed. He’s a murderer at large. He would kill Mikky and Mr. King if he knew what The Wallflower seemed to know. Maybe he would kill Norie. Maybe he’d kill Cypress.
After all, he would definitely kill Max. And she’s surprised it’s taking him this long. Maybe he’s given her a free pass so far just because she didn’t get away with her evil plans. Or maybe he’s just waiting for the right time to kill her and all her morally gray friends and break out of Plath forever. She’s been ignoring the thought; denial tends to kick in when she gets too overwhelmed-- but now the fact of the matter is here, in the flesh, giving her a Hannibal speech that sends shivers down a fragile spine, and she has no way left to ignore him. 
If he’s done the research he says he’s done, it won’t be long before he starts questioning what she’s trying to do with Jimmy this time around. And she’s realistic enough to assume that he’s going to assume the worst; she’s smart enough to realize he’s a loyal friend.
There’s no talking her way out of this. He’s going to try to kill her here. With no witnesses around.
But she’s come too far and been through too much not to go out with her twitching middle finger in the air, so she turns around and takes the first step forward, bony hands balling into fists at her sides.
                             “ FUCK yourself, Schrödinger. 
            “ That’s  NOT  how  it  works.   That’s--- that’s the opposite of how it works.      You can’t just... fucking---!!  MURDER someone because your truth said there was nothing ‘innocent’ left in them.  You think you took out all of the creeps and the cold-hearted murderers on that street? ”  There’s a frustrated little purse of lips. And in a moment of stupid tipsy death-wish courage, she SHOVES HIM. 
                                               “ I think you MISSED ONE !! ”
She’s too flustered to articulate where’s she’s going with this: EVERYTHING IS TRUE. NOTHING IS PERMITTED. From Gabriel’s perspective, he’s doing some sadistic god’s work. From someone else’s, he’s the brave little visionary who saved her from a loveless marriage. But from the mother of at least one of 57 victims, he’s the boy who took her son away-- and she found out the morning she decided not to stop at the liquor store on the way home, before she got a chance to apologize for not being there for her child, before she was going to let him move back in with her so they could sort their lives out together-- and the self-righteous so-called liberal deserves nothing less than the gallows for that. And doesn’t she have good reason? Or was it too little to late for her to turn him and herself around?
There are no wrong answers here, because in the end, your answer doesn’t matter. You may not even believe the story that that mother was just about to reach out to her son. You have no way of knowing what was going through her head. You have no way of knowing everything that was going through her son’s head when he did the heinous thing that put him on Cupid’s hitlist, and maybe he doesn’t, either. You have no way of knowing for thoroughly certain if a person is truly empty and worthless of life, so you don’t get to decide something that ABSOLUTE for someone else. 
Max is uncharacteristically heated to the point of losing self-control now that she’s finally talking about this. You’d almost think this was personal for her, like she spent a year truly believing that she witnessed a murder that never happened. It’s like the collective human race had a hard time believing that a girl with no history of mental illness would suddenly hallucinate what really happened the night her boyfriend died--- like everybody agreed that she knew she was lying in court and just trying to frame an abuse victim for murder, or something. You might even speculate that she had to listen to thousands of people saying that Tyler Romero deserved to die that night on the basis of; well, he was kind of an asshole. 
           “ --------I don’t--                      I don’t think either of you are evil.                          But I think you’re both PATHETIC. ” 
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         “ Elementary school evil. That's you. You’re not an antihero. You’re not a revolutionary. You’re just a dick. You’re a little kid who can’t think critically enough to empathize with people. You’re the big fat bully on the playground who scares people into acting the way you think they should act, and when they don’t, you throw a tantrum. You didn’t CLEAN Chicago. You STAINED IT. You KILLED people because you didn’t trust them to fix their own fucking marriages. You ruined chances for old friends to come back and heal together because you don’t have the basic virtues of patience and mercy to give people another chance past your--- fucking!!--- arbitrary strike system.
         “ Don’t you DARE think I like you better than Him just because I understand more about you. I don’t TRUST YOU just because you’re predictable enough to talk to sometimes. You’re both threats.  You’re both fuck-ups. And you’re just as arrogant as Him. With Him it’s personal. With Him, it’s more stressful--- I don’t know exactly what’s going through His head and it’s--- there’s that Lovecraftian fear-of-the-unknown thing going on. With you, being able to sympathize, it’s... it’s just SAD. And I’m--- I’m worried. I’m worried about BOTH of you. But I’m not... IMPRESSED by either of you. I don’t respect either of you.
           “ You don’t provide any solution, Gabriel. You don’t ‘punish’ people. You kill them.   And that sounds a lot like a FUCKING COP-OUT to me. It sounds like a waste of all that bullshit Good Christian pizzazz. It sounds like you’re kind of a poser who only cares about saving the people who are easy to save, and any God worth worshiping would call you a douchebag, so your whole gimmick is kind of a JOKE.
           “ You want do something with all that strength of yours? Find The Creeper. Handcuff Him. Take Him to COURT. Get Him INCARCERATED. Get Him some therapy, give Him a place to talk about how His father wasn’t there for Him and He didn’t fit in with the kids at school. Find out why He does what He does and get Him some professional help. Give Him a chance to fix Himself. And if that doesn’t work, you do it again and again until He gets His shit together. Doesn’t matter what you think should happen to Him. You’re not entitled to decide who gets to live and who gets to die. You’re not a god. You’re not the entire human race. You’re not even holy, 𝑮𝒂𝒃𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒍. You’re just...
                                           “  a  boy.  ” 
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thorias · 8 years ago
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Random thoughts watching Riverdale episode 8
The episode begins with Jughead describing the Coopers as the Stepfords of Riverdale, meaning there’s a whole lot of insanity bubbling up right beneath the surface and it probably only takes one fly in the ointment to release sheer unadulterated lunacy on anyone in the general vicinity. Yeah, that sounds about right. 
I know Archie has been compared to Jason before on this show, but seeing that flashback of Jason with Polly before his death makes it positively eerie how much Archie and Betty look like carbon copies of them. This was obviously intentional; I just wish I knew what it was meant to symbolize. 
Veronica’s solution to getting the Coopers and the Blossoms on the same page with the Polly situation is to throw a party. The fact that she doesn’t see how getting them all in the same room together would just make things worse is cause for concern. Looks like this may another one of those episodes where Archie is not the most thick-headed person in town for a change. 
Archie looks a wee bit uncomfortable when Veronica calls Betty/Jughead boyfriend and girlfriend, and I’m still right there with him. There aren’t enough NOPE gifs on the internet to express how I feel about this pairing. 
The Blossoms are suddenly trying to put Fred out of business by luring his construction crew away. Because the Blossoms are assholes. And these are the people Veronica thinks can be civil with people they can’t stand when there’s a baby involved? Yeah, okay. 
If Betty thinking that a baby shower with the Coopers and the Blossoms is an amazing idea isn’t a giant, blazing red flag, I don’t know what is. No offense to Betty, but I don’t exactly trust her judgement anymore. 
Betty tells Polly that the entire Cooper family will support her at the baby shower. What is she basing this on? Alice just made it very clear that she thinks this whole thing is a terrible idea and she wants this baby out of the picture. Then again, this is the same Betty who didn’t remember going all Darth Betty and nearly drowning Chuck, so maybe it just slipped her mind. 
Hermione think this baby shower is going to turn into a bloodbath. So the kids think this party is a great idea, while the parents are the ones actually seeing clearly for a change? This is still Riverdale I’m watching, right?
Archie has gotten all his friends to replace Fred’s crew and help out his dad. Okay, THIS is the Archie from the comics. Where has THIS kid been for the last eight episodes? 
Is Polly 18 yet? Because if she’s not, Alice could legally force her to come home. It’s a little strange that Alice hasn’t brought the police into this. 
Polly, the teenage mother, wants Betty, her younger teenage sister, to be the baby’s godmother. Um, are there any responsible and sane adults that she can consider for the job instead? I don’t think Betty’s fragile mental state should be subjected to that kind of pressure. 
Archie is going to the south side to find the Serpents who attacked Moose. That sounds like a good way to get killed, but god damn it, Archie is doing what he thinks is right to help someone who needs it. As ill-advised as this decision may be, I can’t tell him not to do it. This is character surgery Archie needed badly. 
I hope Jughead at least gave his dad a call and asked him to watch out for Archie, Moose and co. when they’re in Serpent territory. Otherwise, Jughead isn’t coming off so well here. I know that he doesn’t want anyone knowing that his dad is a Serpent and I sympathize, but this is a pretty dangerous thing his friends are doing and he’s not having their back here.  
Does Kevin’s Serpent boyfriend bear a downright scary resemblance to a young John Travolta or is it just me? 
Archie confronts one of the Serpents in the Serpents’ hangout and pretty much starts a fight. Okay, he’s not getting any smarter exactly, but doing a stupid thing for the right reason is still a big step forward for him. 
Cheryl wants to be the baby’s godmother? Um... until we know what exactly the nature of her (twincest?) relationship with Jason was and exactly how desperate she is to hold onto any piece of him, no matter how small, I would advise against that. Man, this kid is going to be so messed up... 
Cheryl’s insane grandma thinks Polly is having twins. I want to think she’s just off her rocker, but wouldn’t it be just like this show if she turned out to be right? 
When the baby shower was actually going well, I assumed it would be the Blossoms who ruined it. Ironically, it’s Archie who makes things awkward first by barging in and telling everyone about Jughead’s dad being in the Serpents. He could have done this in private and it’s a dick move to tell anyone else without talking to Jughead first, but Archie did just almost get his ass kicked and Jughead did let him go into that bar knowing that might happen. Hard to say who’s being more of a jerk here, so let’s just call it a wash. 
Now the Blossoms are inviting Polly to live with them. Dear god, if Polly walks through Thorn Hill’s gates, she’s not coming out alive. 
The baby shower ends with the Cooper and Blossom moms at each other’s throats. Who could have possibly seen this coming? Besides everyone, I mean. 
Anyone else surprised that it was Polly’s dad who tried to force her to get an abortion and not Alice? Daddy Cooper has always seemed like the more reasonable one, so I guess I should have expected the writers to drag him further into the mud at some point. 
Few things in this show make Archie as sympathetic as the scenes with him and his dad. If we’d had more of these early on, those first couple episodes wouldn’t have been so frustrating. 
Jughead admits that he should have told Betty about his dad. Well, yeah, but more concerning is that he should have told Archie before Archie went into Serpent territory, but he didn’t. 
Jughead asks if his dad had anything to do with Jason’s death. Daddy Jones says he’s no killer, which isn’t exactly saying no. I don’t think he was the guy who pulled the trigger, but he clearly has at least some idea who did. Jason’s jacket didn’t get into his closet by accident. 
Betty and Jughead kiss again and... UGH! NO! I DON’T WANT TO SEE THIS! THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES JUGHEAD’S DICK HARD IS HAMBURGERS! THIS IS WRONG!  
So Betty’s dad did the same thing to Alice that he tried to do with Polly? I understand kid’s being to young to become parents, but it’s still a shitty thing to do. Alice is making a little more sense all of a sudden. 
Betty’s dad is an asshole now. He doesn’t want Polly moving back in because of her “mistake?” He hates the Blossoms so much that he’s throwing his own daughter under the bus? Are we really going to take things this far just to make Alice look like the sympathetic parent? 
To her credit, (yeah, I can’t believe I’m saying it either) Alice tells her husband to get out so Polly can come home. Alice Cooper doing the right thing? Now I know this isn’t Riverdale I’m watching. 
Archie and Jughead make up so quickly and easily, it’s almost funny. Is this supposed to be some sort of weird commentary on how irrational the Blossom/Cooper enmity is when these two can resolve a pretty serious argument with one short conversation?
Kevin’s Travolta-lookalike boyfriend is playing him as insurance in case the cops find out about the Serpent’s involvement in Jason’s death. Geez, poor Kevin. Maybe Moose will be up for another round of skinny dipping to take his mind of things.   
And then in the very next scene, Jughead’s dad shows up with a construction crew to help out Fred. I don’t know what the hell to think about this guy anymore. I guess the upshot is that he’s one profoundly complicated dude. 
If Veronica is the one who told Hiram about Hermione snogging Fred, I’m going to be upset. I’d like to think it wasn’t her, but Archie was the only other person who knew and I kind of doubt he’d tell Hiram. 
Polly STILL chooses to live with the Blossoms after Alice kicked her husband out. Dang, the first time Alice actually does the right thing for her family and she gets kicked in the gut for it. I can’t believe I actually feel bad for Alice Cooper. What is this show doing to me? 
How did we go from Cheryl telling Polly to run because her parents didn’t want to help her and the baby in the last episode, to Cheryl inviting Polly to stay in her house and her parents being totally cool with it? Are the Blossoms doing this just to spite Alice? Sadly that wouldn’t surprise me. 
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realfinemood · 8 years ago
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Ryder Appreciation Week Meme!
Questions are from here. I’m going to do all of them instead of waiting for asks because apparently I have A LOT of stuff I want to say about Gwendolyn Ryder.
1. Does your Ryder like their father?
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It’s complicated. She loves him, because… he’s her dad. But she can’t really say she particularly liked him. That would require him actually being around, or being present when he was. She can admit that she worked harder in school partly out of a desire for his approval, but the fact that she was more interested in science and tech than becoming an N7 like him didn’t really help. The fact that Scott tried even harder for his approval and still failed bothered her more than anything. She’s not a big fan of how he treats other people in general. (She knows she’s not super great with emotions either, but she likes to think she handles it better.)
It was getting better with the Initiative, though she had to work through her own anger that Dad’s work had ruined her own standing with a career she loved. That he saved her life at the cost of his own is a shock to her, one that she feels completely guilty about, and the fact that she can’t talk to Scott - the only person who’d really understand - makes it worse. The memories make things even more confusing, and hearing Cora talk about things she really should already know makes her feel even more guilty, but it’s at least made her understand her father a bit more.
2. How does your Ryder feel about their sibling?
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Gwendolyn adores her baby brother. She knows she’s not really older than him in any important way, but she’s always been overprotective of him, even more so the more distant Dad grew. (Scott grumbles about it, but knows that’s her way of showing she cares.) Growing up they were partners in crime, but she’d always take the blame and claimed she talked him into it, especially if Mom was particularly mad about whatever it was. When they got older and he got a bit angrier/more emotional, she’d often let him just vent at her about everything, or bail him out when needed.
3. If given the chance, do you think your Ryder would be a good Nexus Director?
Not remotely. She didn’t fly 600 years to a different galaxy just to sit around playing school principal. The politics she has to deal with as Pathfinder are bad enough, thanks.
4. What’s your Ryder’s favorite weapon?
Gwen’s not really a weapon fangirl in any way? But when she saw that she could make a Black Widow that wouldn’t break her arm to use, she had to have it. That and whatever pistol she can find works for her.
5. What’s your Ryder’s fighting style/class? (biotic sniper can be a thing now!)
Her main fighting style is "build as manly tech toys as she can.” Her omnitool back in the Milky Way was modded with everything she could think up, but she needed a new one to integrate with Sam and the scanner. When she figured out how to get a flamethrower from it, it was love. When she got a shiny Remnant VI to replace her turret, Peebee became her new best friend. 
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6. Does your Ryder get along well with Tann, Addison, Kandros or Kesh?
She sympathized with Tann at first - having a job that you’re not remotely prepared for? Totally understand. But the political bullshit got old fast. She gave Addison shit but knew she was completely right to distrust her ability to be Pathfinder. After having to do clean up on so many of her screw-ups though, Ryder’s general opinion of Addison is just to roll her eyes. Kandros is great - the fact that he knew everything that was going on was a lot for her and offered her a friendly shoulder meant a lot, even if they don’t agree on much. She really likes Kesh and considers her a friend, which is why the fact that even she didn’t stand up for her about going to Meridian hurt more than she expected it to.
7. Is your Ryder good at driving the Nomad?
She is and her squad can shut it. No but really, she drives fine. A slight tendency to drive up things that are clearly too steep to be climbed, but that’s what six wheels are for and you never know until you try, right?
8. What is the one Pathfinder task that your Ryder hates?
The speeches Addison makes her give everytime they start up an outpost. There’s things to explore and science to do and the galaxy is at least a tiny bit more stable. Either people will see that or they won’t, she doesn’t really get how making an awkward speech about it will help. Keri’s interviews she gets and just telling the truth is easy enough. But the speeches are time she could be spending doing literally anything else, and surely there’s people who could do a much better job of explaining.
She also hates that she has to spend some much time killing remnant instead of studying them, though that seems to be more an “existing in Adromeda” thing than a Pathfinder thing. She’s trying to take Peebee’s “can’t study them if they kill me” motto to heart.
9. What does your Ryder enjoy about being a Pathfinder?
She gets to initiate first contact with an alien species and explore vaults and alien planets before almost anyone else from the Milky Way. That is amazing and she’s definitely not taking it for granted.
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10. How does your Ryder feel about the memories they unlocked?
Seeing Mom again hurt like hell. She always told Scott that of course Dad loved Mom, he was just grieving differently, but she never really 100% believed it until she watched them. Which brought more guilt of course, and more anger that he could just be with her instead of obsessing over Sam fixing her, but it was good to actually see that for herself. The fact that they could one day get Mom back is… something she’s putting off thinking about.
11. Does your Ryder consider SAM a friend/sibling/…?
Sam was Dad’s little project that screwed over her career and the thing he’d obsess about instead of spending what little time she had left with Mom. Once he’s in her head, well. Not much she can do about it, so might as well accept it, and it’s not like she can blame him anyways. She quickly grows to trust him and “friend” is probably a good word for it, though she’s more fascinated by the process of an AI learning and comparing her and her father’s actions. And teaching him her terrible sense of humor is a nice bonus.
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12. What’s your Ryder’s favorite location in Andromeda?
Havarl. Not only is it gorgeous, but the ecology and the mutation of it is fascinating. She’s glad the council didn’t force the issue of putting a colony there, but she does which she could spend more time with the scientist there to study everything that’s going on.
13. If your Ryder could give one gift to their LI (if there is one!), what would they give?
The idea that she could find it when Vetra and all her contacts couldn’t is ridiculous, but she definitely recruited Sid into a fruitless attempt to find that ugly lamp Vetra wanted so much. She attempted making one and it was so terrible but Vetra loved it anyway, once she was done hysterically laughing at it.
14. How does your Ryder feel about the fight between Kallo and Gil?
She gets why Gil did what he does, and she quite frankly agreed with him. No matter how good Kallo’s team was, Andromeda brought things they couldn’t have expected. But that didn’t give him a license to be a dick to Kallo about it, or to not share with the rest of the crew when he changed things, or to make those changes while they were in flight. By all means, fix what needs fixing. But actually remember other people have value too.
15. What does your Ryder think about Shepard?
(I have no idea if this lines up with the timeline, but I’m going with it.) Gwendolyn and Scott were on the Citadel during the geth attack, though their ward was locked away from the real action. They only have news reports and friend-of-a-friend second hand stories, but she knows that Shepard and her team are what saved the day. Even if the council dying meant the Citadel got a little less fun for humans afterwards, she still thinks Shepard was pretty badass.
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16. Does your Ryder like the other Pathfinders?
Definitely. She can’t help but feel empathy for people scared and still helping or working despite their grief. She doesn’t know Hayjer as well as Vederia and Avitus, but the fact that they all stepped up and supported her means a hell of a lot.
17. What is the one lesson your Ryder learned in Andromeda?
Planning things out and taking time to think them through is great, but it’s also a luxury. She was always a look before you leap kind of person, but Andromeda has taught her the interesting new strategy of “no one else has a clue, so wing it and figure out how much trouble you’re in later.”
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18. What is the hardest thing your Ryder had to do in their life?
Leaving Scott to go pathfind. It was hard enough leaving him behind when it was only going to be a short trip. But taking off in the Tempest made her feel like she was abandoning him. Sure, there was nothing she could have done, and he was in good hands with Harry, but she was supposed to protect him and she couldn’t help feeling like she’d massively failed.
19. Does your Ryder like memes?
Absolutely. She makes sure to share the best ones with Liam and the most annoying ones with the entirety of the Tempest.
20. Which song would represent your Ryder well?
A combination of Fake It Till You Make It by BRIIA and Journey (Ready to Fly) by Natasha Blume.
And another meme because I can, I did this archetypes quiz with Gwendolyn:
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And one with Lalla Shepard cause why not:
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