#which only encouraged roxy)

[docterrrolal]

i ran out of room in the tags. oh well.

i have SO many opinions on bro and mom. i think about the bromom sketch hussie made every day. no they arent romantically involved obviously but theyre like. soulmates. shitty shitty soulmates. they will always feel so strongly about each other, the only reason why they didnt interact in the comic is because the vibes emanating from them would be so intense that it would have just distracted from everything else going on. god i hope they commit murder suicide.

[theallianceofcelestials]

Sooo, yesterday's MASM episode, huh?

Why is Moonblock, Moonstone, whatever you wanna call him, the way he is? He doesn't make any sense! I'm not going to talk about anything they do in gaming videos, because that's just the VA's bullying eachother, like frinds do.

Pulling Sun along on their adventures as a way to try and bond, helping him (however reluctant that help may be) whenever Sunny goes to him for something, fixing him up during the night, while Sun is sleeping, knowing and making him his favourite cookies (once), wingmanned him a handful of times (the one where he told Sun, Roxy and Foxy to go get ice cream, which turned into the Roxy and Sun date episode, was very sweet of him) ect.

But then turning around, calling him mean names, yelling at him, hitting him, laughing and encouraging when others are jackasses to him (like when Bonnie hung him from the ceiling, and he was up there for days. crying.), joining in on when a child as a form of playing, wanted to stab him - and yeah, sure, he may be made of metal and plastic, so he would've been mostly fine if the kid stabbed him, but just like with the rabbit shooting him with fake bullets, that still hurts, - stabbing him just in general with a sword, blowing him up, letting others shove grass and weeds down his throat and jumping on him from higher and higher with more and more force (which actually could've seriously injured him. they're heavy machines, who were not made to whitstand other heavy machines jumping on them), hitting him and letting him be hit by others with a shopping cart, that half-assed apology in 'Sun Begins His VILLAIN ARC With Eclipse??!!' episode, which kind of sounded condescending if you ask me, basically going "Welp, I tried" when Sun still refused to go back "home", and all the other other sins the little space rock has, but we'd be here all night and I have to watch my bloodpressure.

He clearly wants to be friends with Sun, or at least wants to spend time with him, as I already mentioned. He wants to be close-ish with him. And he claims he likes him, just like how he likes everyone else in the Plex.

But that just feels like he said it, one so Sun wouldn't leave, and two so he doesn't have to directly tell him he likes him.

He sometimes acts almost exactly like the stereotypycal *giggling and kicking feet in the air* "My crush/bestest friend forever and meee <3", but in the most assholeish Karen way of "If A bOy PuLlS yOuR hAiR aNd Is BuLlYiNg YoU! ThAt MeAnS hE iS cRuShInG oN yOu!"

Like, "Oooh I'll write me and Sun's name together as the password🥰! But throw in someone else's name aswell, so if he ever finds out I can just say it's me and my two friends!!"

Make it make sense!

This post was meant to be about how the way everyone acted in yesterday's episode 'Sun Continues His VILLAIN ARC And Plans REVENGE...' felt heavily like it was backtracking. But I kind of got sidetracked with talking about the little space rock.

How "Yeah, I only was an ass to you and abused, so you would reach your literal breaking point, snap and go join Eclipse, so I could try and catch him. Proud of ya, or whatever I'm supposed to say, here's a plush... Still going to shoot you. Because why not." and "Ohh ya know, stabbing people is just Foxy's way of showing he loves you! Classic Foxy teehee!" just felt like some poor attempt at damage control. Same with suddenly everyone wanting to hang out with Sun, the one time he wanted to be left alone.

I'm not counting Freddy, his IQ is room temperature on good days, and I mean it in the nicest of ways. As nice as can be.

But why do suddenly everyone else want to hang out with Sun, like he's suddenly the most interesting of people. Though they're still hitting him with gokarts, insisting they need to look at something at the back of his head (a bump which may or may not have even been there), and when he rejected the idea of them looking at his head, clearly uncomfortable, they surrounded him, held him down, and forcibly checked his head and then fixed(?) it.

And then when he wanted to be alone again to cry, they still wouldn't leave him be. The rabbit actually wanted to watch.

In short, because I truly lost where I was going with this post and just started ranting, yesterday's episode felt like everyone attempting to backtrack a little, but falling back into the comfortable habits, the little space rock confuses me (what do you want?! do you want to be friends? do you want to hold hands with him in the most romantic of ways? do you just view him as a sentient punching bag?! do you just want to keep him around and fix him up, so he can do all the daycare stuff so you don't have to?!), I hate the rabbit so much, same with the gator and the fox, disappointed in the others, and Sunblock. Deserves. Justice.

[teefsintheweb]

CONTAINMENT BREACH AU MASTERPOST

Hello! I am Teefs, an extraterrestrial creature on the internet.

My fondness for sci-fi and things like SCP have gotten mixed up with my obsession with FNAF, specifically, FNAF SB.

Containment Breach takes place in an alternate universe based on the world designed for a comic project I'm doing over at @remnantsofmatter . There's this unnamed 'facility' that focus on researching and containing anomalies and other worldly entities.

The facility is morally corrupt only seeing these creatures as things to use to gain power to remain at the top of the food chain if there would ever be an incomprehensible danger threatening Earth.

The characters are still being thought out but this is what we have so far:

The star of the au because he is my favorite guy ever is Glamrock Freddy! in this au he is an anthro bear who recently got hired by this unnamed facility as a lead in researching anomalies and other worldly entities.

Vanessa is an emotionally distant supervisor always putting pressure on Freddy, making her a figure he often tries to avoid due to her intimidating him and stressing him out into overworking himself, but he will remain respectful and polite.

Chica is a receptionist being kept in the dark about the legitimacy of her job, she's just there to smile at government inspectors and keep them from looking further into what the facility does. Chica is Freddy's best friend from childhood.

Roxy and Monty are guards working in the facility, the frontline responders if an entity breaks out of containment.

Monty often gets into conflict with Freddy, Freddy being very protective and caring to the entities and wanting them to be treated with gentle care- which Monty knows is unrealistic because he has had to chose between a lethal shot and his life. He knows [or strongly believes] that the entities are not as "human" as the staff in the facility, his priority is keeping everyone safe no matter what thing is attempting to rip out his throat.

Bonnie in this au was designed by @himbo-in-limbo . He's a janitor at this facility that avoids death by being the silliest goober ever. Monty may try setting him up by sending him to clean the containment unit of an extremely hostile entity only for Bonnie to walk out perfectly calm without a scratch.

more characters may be added and more detailed relationship dynamics as well!

This au was created in the Rockstar Row Discord server. Which then comes the most appealing part of this au I believe, the self inserts.

I have encouraged my friends who are part of the server to design their sona's/oc's into the au!!

This post being an example by Venbetta!

Essentially I have put together a doll house to the server and am inviting my friends to make dolls so we can all play together. I'm not sure whether or not I'm comfortable with people outside the server inserting themselves into the au. Smaller projects are much more manageable than suddenly a bunch of strangers flooding in from any corner.

we're all just playing dolls and so far everyone is playing nice, we're keeping it that way.

we're also very sick in the head when it comes to Researcher!Freddy. I have been mainly kept everyhting related to the au in the discord server but I guess I'll attempt to post about it.

[rustboxstarr]

🏖Grown Ups🏖 part 1

Summary: You've been pulling away from Eddie recently its not until summer vacation that you finally find your way back to him.

Pairings: Dad!Eddie Munson x PlusSize!Mom!Reader

Warnings: Holy hell prepare yourself -> worrying about R potentially cheating, angst, talk of sex, slightly derogatory talk of sex, Gareth is a womanizer (Sorryyyyy needed someone to be!), alcohol consumption, thoughts of sex, thoughts tiddie fucking, kissing, Eddie being kinda desperate and horny for sex but trying to be respectful, nudity, R has tattoos, nipple and belly button piercing, body insecurity (Don’t worry Eddies just being a weirdo, she loves herself otherwise!), smoking, Steve being an insightful mama hen and apparently knows how women function (Steves a sweetheart, we want all men to be like Steve), light confrontation, looming anxiety, drunken accidental grinding, groping, R being to drunk to remember ALMOST having sex , threats of violence, tiddie sucking, hickeys, oral f receiving, fingering, squirting, interruptions, talk of oral m receiving, Smut P in V, no cut offs or dividers, sorry forgot to put them in. I tried to stay away Y/N I rly did but I think it slipped in once or twice (Sorry not sorry 😈)

Wordcount: Short and sweet only 22.2k........ (Yeah this fic quite literally ripped the idea in my head and sprinted away with it like it was wanted for murder (Get it? HAHAHAHA (Explaining my jokes, I love myself))

A/N: So I was watching Grown Ups (2010) the other day and thought it was so funny when all the guys talk about how little they have sex with their wives, but then it spiraled and got slightly angsty but personally I love this! Character list and ages under the cut :)

Love yas!

Part 2

Drawings I made for the fic for some visuals 😊

Grown Ups masterlist

Check out my other works!

Max (35), Lukas (35) - twins Eric (6) and Billy (6)

El (35), Mike (35) - no kids

Dustin (35), Suzie (35) - Willow (11 months)

Eddie (41), You (40) - Ophelia (10) and Roxette (7)

Gareth (37) - single, no kids

Luke -unnamed freak (39), Simone (38) - Tom (5) and Oliver (3) - not that it matters but Simone is african american so the kids are mixed incase it might be nice to visualise 

Jeff (37), Tracy (45) - Ariana (16) (Tracy's daughter)

Will (35), Winter (33) - no kids

Steve (40), Nancy (39) - Mercy (11), Lousie (9), Rachel (7), Marcus(5), Bianca (3) and Dustin (2)

Jonathan (39), Charlotte (41) - Emma (6), Charlie (4) and Lilly (2)

Robin(39), Vickie(39) - no kids

Argyle (40), Eden (38) - no kids

------------

Summer 1998, the sun was shining bright against the pastel blues of the sky, temperatures rising all over the country, it was the best time of the year, 10 year old Ophelia and 7 year old Roxette were off school for the summer holidays, you had your 6 weeks off and Eddie took leave from work, cashing his holidays in broken up during the 9 weeks of summer to be with you and his kids. Mid june and the Munson family had gotten the chance to rest for the first 5 days before the roadtrip to Dustin��s late granny’s lakehouse in Muskegon, the five hour road trip delayed with multiple food stops, toilet breaks, a few car boot sales which signs had caught you eye, one mall trip to stave off Roxy’s crying when she realised she forgot to pack her bathing suit and a few leg stretchers to keep both the kids from going crazy in the backseat. 

Ophelia had grown up to become a relatively quiet kid, calm, never too temperous and always content with following around with the grown ups plan, god knows how, neither you nor Eddie were ever people to be considered calm and peaceful. In your youth running around being chased by Hopper after breaking into abandoned places, caught drunk encouraging Eddie to piss on the large bronze statue situated in front of the mayor's office, shoplifting, vandalism, disturbing the peace, there had even been one time where Hopper had knocked on Wayne’s trailer door, two embarrassed soon to be adults stood behind him, wrapped up in blankets with not a single other article of clothing on for modesty after giving you both a ‘ride home’ as you liked to joke. 

The straight defiance of US laws simmered down after Ophelia came along but partying, loud obnoxious jokes, crazy schemes and dramatic displays of affection were still something very normal for the two of you. Well normal up until the last six months or so where it had simmered down. The both of you were still cuddly and giggly and chummy with each other, but lately it seemed you both had drifted apart, admittedly you more than him.

Roxette however seemed to have taken to both of you, couldn't sit still, always loud, always on the move, yup she was the embodiment of both yours and Eddie’s personalities, the same reason as to why the five hour road trip pushed 9 hours. Roxy could barely handle the 20 minute drive to school…

Up at 8 am packing the kids into the car with plenty of books, comics, cd’s and toys you set out. Eddie at the wheel of your 95 Mitsubishi Mirage while you cozied under a blanket next to him, head lolling on your shoulders threatening to tip you over until you adjusted yourself to sit up against the window as you let that comforting dull, cloudy feeling overtake you and drift you off to sleep. In the back Roxette was fast asleep while Ophelia bobbed her head in tune to Tupak Shakur’s latest album R U Still Down? playing in the round silvery cd player Eddie kept in the glove compartment, staring out at the trees whizzing past the window. 

The clock was nearing 5 pm when the car pulled off the bumpy road -with Eddie in the passenger seat- over the gravel parking lot to what Dustin had called The Henderson Castle. A quaint surprisingly large cabin in dark mahogany wood panelling, green chipping edging and beams matching the green steps to the bright blue double doors. Lake Michigan painted the horizon behind the garden, a small private beach next to a short dock attached to a boathouse and a sailboat tied to the wood panels, a rack of 5 canoes resting on the old water stained wood. Wooden beach chairs and plastic loungers framed in by the litter of trees and behind a picnic table and worn down monkey bars. 

Eddie took to emptying the boot of duffle bags and food bags while you urged Ophi and Roxy out of the back. Cars of different prince rages surrounded them as things were retrieved out of the vehicle, “Well well well look who decided to show up!” Dusting grinned from the front door, carrying a little girl on his hip who tucked her head into his shoulder in shyness. 

Matching grins were shone at the 35 year old as he descended the steps to greet you “What's up man!” Eddie patted him on the back in a one armed hug before he went around to give you a proper hug. “Hi! I’m Roxette” your daughter said excitedly, Dustin bent down to talk to her “I know, we've met before” his voice was sweet and mischievous as he stuck out his hand for Roxette to shake. 

You were all hustled into the house where a large group of people were scattered around the kitchen, dining table to your left and living room to your right behind the kitchen, all hollering in delight as your family of four stepped over the threshold. Hugs were exchanged as well as ‘took you long enough’s and ‘did you learn to read the clock in your three years of senior year’s, soon enough a wide spread of food, carefully put out by Dustin's wife Suzie had been devoured and catch ups had been exchanged. 

Dustin had taken the duty of showing everyone to their rooms, Jonathan’s three kids, Emma, Charlie and Lily, Luke’s Carl and Tom, Steve and Nancy's six nuggets Mercy, Lousie, Rachel, Marcus, Bianca and Dustin, Max and Lucas’s twin boys Eric and Billy, as well as Ophelia and Roxette were all given the privilege of sharing the well lit and cozy basement. 17 kids with the exception of Willow who had her own little bed with Dustin and Suzie and Ariana, Jeff’s 16 year old step daughter who got her own room, were all over the moon, excited about causing as much ruckus as they could. Parents and couples alike all directed upstairs to the second and third floor for their own bedrooms in the impressive lakehouse. 

The time on Eddie’s watch showed 11:32 as he took it off and placed it on his temporary nightstand for the next week when you crawled under the patchwork cover and got yourself comfortable on your side. Teeth brushed, clothes changed, good nights said and bags unzipped it was time to turn in for the night. Something about being on the go for 8 and a half hours and then making conversation in a room full of 39 other people was extremely exhausting and it caught up to you as your head nestled into the plush worn cotton pillow. 

You heard Eddie yawn loudly behind you as he no doubt flung his balled up fists out in the air, stretching like a cat by the side of the bed. He rustled behind you until you felt the cover lift and a warm body dip into the mattress, humming as he scooted over to wrap his arms around you and hold your back to his chest. You bathed in his embrace, happy and content cuddling up with your husband until, you felt him move again to press his hips against your. A soft grunt escaped your lips as Eddie pushed his hard on to nestle between your ass cheeks, on display from the back of your threadbare t-shirt riding up. 

“Mm Eddie I’m really tired” you groaned quietly, nestling further into his arms wrapped around you. You heard him sigh and had your eyes been open you would have undoubtedly rolled them at his reaction “We’ve been on the go since 8 am, I’m really not in the mood” you further explained “I know baby” Eddies breathed slightly disappointed, in the back of his mind he had hoped that the change of scenery might get you exited, possibly put a stop to the dry spell you had seemed to be going through. “Lets just go to sleep yeah?” he whispered, fingers crossed that his disappointment and slight annoyance at his idea being wrong couldn't be detected in his voice. You hummed in agreement as Eddie slackened behind you and fell asleep. 

The morning had been hectic, starting off already at 7 am when both girls rushed in to find their clothes, awakening you as they spoke loudly “Girls you know this” Eddie sighed as he tiredly sat up on his side of the bed, pulling his warm grasp away from you “Knock on the door, don't just barge in” he was slightly exasperated as he told them off “But were on vacation!” Roxette whined as she paused in rifling through one of the bags “Yeah well the rule still applies”. Even though it might be mostly your fault it was still funny that he was dictating a rule set in place so they wouldn't walk in on you having sex when you actually hadn’t even had sex in god knows how long. 

The reason why you were mostly at fault for the fact was that yes you were the first to cool down with initiating it but you didn't accept Eddie’s advances even when he tried. But recently you just hadn’t been in the mood, work had been hectic and you barely had time for each other, to top it all off lately you’d just felt a dip in your confidence. The fact that you were now in your 40s just seemed to catch up with your busy brain, you didn't look the way you did when you and Eddie first got together, or even the way you did just a few years ago. You'd always been on the bigger side of scales but that never bothered you, in fact your looks weren’t even the problem, objectively. It was the way you felt inside, old, tired, unnatractive, it had caused you to pull back from him, curl in on yourself and throw yourself into being a mom and a good boss. 

Eddie had to keep reminding himself that there wasn't a chance in the realm of possibility that the reason you were staying late at work had anything to do with anything other than work. Something he found himself telling his brain a lot whenever your nearest colleague Greg resurfaced in his mind. Greg was a sweet lovely man who worked just below you, but it was hard to remind himself of that as he thought about the many hours you spend at work alone with him. Even though he was a good kind soul he was undoubtedly attractive, even though he knew you were loyal to your husband and he to his wife and even though he knew he was more your type than Greg was it was still a constant bicker in his brain. 

–

The rest of the morning was even worse, such a drastic change from lounging around the house or almost falling asleep on a blanket in the yard as you attempted to read. Kids were everywhere, everyone was talking, moving around and trying to get to the food served for breakfast, it was stressful to say the least. You were used to large crowds, parties, concerts and other events but now it was just too much, and it seemed to show as Eddie wrapped his arms around your shoulders behind you, planting a kiss to your temple as you talked to Tracy, Jeff’s wife. You appreciated the gesture, even though you hadn’t been all too close to him recently and it was clearly beginning to frustrate him he was still there for you, something that made your heart squeeze. 

Finally around noon the pace had slowed, some kids were occupied with games and crafts inside while your own played with Luke's, Steve and Nancy's kids in the water. Splashing around happily as Nancy floated around nearby while you took the chance to get to know Luke's wife Simone and Jeff’s Tracy better. Eddie, Steve, Gareth, Jeff and Luke all lounged around on the chairs pushed into the sand just as it turned to grass behind them. 

“So Gare, still sad and single?” Jeff chuckled as he sipped a matching cool beer to the rest “Hah! Sad? I’d take being single any day over commitment and fuckin’ kids” he scoffed, legs spread wide as he tanned under the sun in baggy ombre trunks. “Hey having kids aint that bad” Steve grinned “Oh sure, I bet it's a riot being woken up at 5 am by 6 little assholes every morning” he chuckled. 

The sun was high up in the sky, water glittering under the shine as it splashed around by the kids shrieking and laughing. “Ugh, had to remind mine to knock on the fucking door this morning, both of them just waltzed in like they owned the place” Eddie supplied as he looked over at you. Stood by the waters edge laughing at a story Simone was telling, his eyes scanned down your frame quickly, lavender purple full briefs that came up to your waist, just below that glittering jem butterfly hanging from your belly button, a ruching detail at the front and a matching purple halter top to match. He had to look away before he began oggling at your round curves at the way the haltertop bikini pushed your tits up to each other, fuck he would have loved to kiss all the way down your throat and over your chest. 

“Ooh ‘fraid the kids are gonna walk in and be scarred for life by your pasty white ass?” Gareth laughed at his joke as his eyes flicked over to you too. “Pffft” Eddie deprecatingly shooed “Nah man, that hasn't been a risk for like ages” he took a large gulp of the cold beer in his hands “Now that I think about it, hasn't been a risk since like before christmas” 

“That's what marriage does to ya, too high on the feeling of new love and sparkly lights of wedding planning till they dim and she sees your ugly face at the altar” Gareth sat up to inspect Eddie slightly, Eddie laughed along with the others “Man shut up” he managed through a smile.”She's not pregnant is she?” Luke piped up as everyone was now looking over at the subject in question. 

From the corner of your eye you noticed the attention and turned slowly with a soft confused frown, Steve and Luke smiled at you as Jeff quickly averted his gaze, Eddie giving you a forced smile before he slapped Gareth's hand down which was waving at you, fingers wiggling as a seductive smiled painted his features. Your frown deepened as you awkwardly waved back and turned back to the other moms. 

Eddie's face switched from annoyed to questioning as he turned from Gareth to Luke “What?” his brows pinched as wrinkles formed on his forehead. “Well when Simone is pregnant she gets kinda distant, doesn’t wanna do anything” he further explained. “Nah man she’s not pregnant, she's got an implant” 

“Eh, dont beat yourself up about it, me and Nancy barely have any time for ourselves let alone fucking” Steve waved him off. “Yeah well she's had six kids, probably sick of your junk by now” Jeff chuckled, an eye roll from Steve in return. 

“I dunno, she's just busy, got alot on with work and the kids” he pushed his sunglasses further up his face as the sun resurfaced out of a cloud. He did not want to mention Greg and listen to Gareth's lude comments or let any of the others feed him delusions. You were not cheating. “Who knows, maybe she's sick of your junk too. Tell ya what, send her my way I’ll get her walking out a happy woman” Gareth smirked wickedly. “If you don't shut your mouth I’m gonna come over there and beat the shit out of you” he leaned forward with his elbows on his knees to look over at Gareth who put his hands up in surrender. 

“Apart from Steve am I the only one not getting some action” before Gareth had a chance to open his mouth Eddie pointed at him “and you shut up” he sneered. “I mean Ariana’s like 16 so she's never really home, so we do.. get the house to ourselves quite a bit..” Jeff answered sheepishly “Great” Eddie turned to Luke “Mine are fuckin’ 3 and 5 but I mean we have some time sometimes” Luke shrugged “How often is sometimes?” Luke cleared his throat and dropped his voice to an awkward tone “Like.. two… three times.. a week” he looked out at the water. 

“Jesus christ, so it's not like a normal thing?” he slumped back in his chair, looking back at you, smiling widely as you now stood splashing water at Roxette, not on the beach anymore. “Have you talked to her?” Jeff asked “I mean no not really, but she's made it obvious she doesn’t wanna do anything, so I've just kinda backed off” he looked back at his friend. “But you've tried like starting something?” “Yeah, less and less now but yeah” 

“You tried getting her drunk?” Gareth chuckled but fell dead silent as Eddie began to lean forward about to get up and smack him “Chill chill!” he held his hands out in front of him, awaiting the attack. “I just meant loosen her up a little, get her relaxed maybe put her mind off things” 

“You're a dick” Eddie flipped him off “He does kind of have a point, maybe she’ll relax a bit” Luke cleared his throat “We could I dunno all sit ‘round the fire after all the kids have gone to bed. Then she might not have to worry about that ya know?” 

“I mean I guess, but isn't that like a complete asshole move, get her drunk just so I can get her into bed?” he made a slight look of disgust at the thought “Not drunk, just a little I guess tipsy?” 

The conversation continued for a while before the topic changed to Jeff's new job, all sat in the sun basking in the light, soaking it up and talking about nonsense. Ophelia and Roxy came out of the water and Eddie watched as you dried them off lovingly and led them up to the house. He was nursing his fourth beer, head starting to go a little fuzzy as Simone too sent Tom and Oliver up to the house, Nancy was left throwing Bianca around in the water as the other three laughed and all shouted me! me! Me!’s, Dustin the two year old splashing happily by the waters edge. Simone and Tracy made their way up the sand to sit with the guys. 

Tracy told Jeff she was going to check on Ariana as Simone plopped herself down in Luke’s lap happily giving him a kiss following up with a giggle when she pulled back “Jesus how many beers have you drank”. She sat mostly quiet as they all continued, now about some recent U.S news, jumping in to add to the conversation as she draped her arm around Luke's shoulders. 

Eddie had his back to the house as he opened his fifth beer and leaning back even more into the chair, he didn't see as you came back out of the house walking down towards them. Only laying eyes on you as you rounded his chair at the end of the row of them facing the water, barely registering you before you stood before him. As the others continued talking he looked up at you expectantly, waiting for you to say something, assuming you had come to ask something of him. His heart skipped a beat as you inched closer to him, his fingertips grazing your thigh. “Can I sit?” you ask with a sweet smile, his cloudy brain was too gone with the cool fizzing beer to register that you had spoken as he broke out in a grin witnessing your happy face, it warmed him to see you, you being happy made him happy. He suddenly realised you had talked to him and shook his head attempting to look up at you more serious, you giggled softly at him as he straightened his face up, but hearing those sweet little noises of content made that dopey grin fall right back into place “I said, can I sit?” your voice was so sweet it made his whole brain stop. 

“Oh, yeah” he chuckled as he sat up properly, hands itching to touch you. His dopey grin became even dopier, even wider as you turned and bent down to place yourself in his lap, legs coming to curl up and feet slot between his thigh and the space under the armrest. When you settled Eddie’s hand holding his beer settled over your thighs and his other came around your waist, wrapping around you and pulling you towards him to lean against his chest. He almost died as he saw your smile widen at the action and nestle into him, and then even wider as he placed a kiss to your shoulder. He was on cloud nine at the fact that you were sitting in his lap, smiling away. You haven't sat in his lap for a long looong time and the fact that you did it so easily made his heart squeeze and his head spin. 

“Oh Simone you never got to tell me about your trip!” you exclaimed as the conversation quieted down “Oh right! So-” she began to recount her crazy trip to Japan she had taken a few weeks ago for work as Eddie took another sip of his beer, light shock painting his features as you took the bottle from him and took your own gulp while you listened intently. The sun was almost right behind Simone and you began to squint as you tried making eye contact with her, you turned to look down at Eddie for only a second before you realised he had his sunglasses on. Casually you reached up a hand to pull them off him and place them on your nose, Eddie chuckled at the action which made you giggle slightly as you continued listening. 

With no glasses on now, everything was a lot brighter, he settled into the new position and calmed down from his excitement and finally got a chance to register what you were wearing. A floral short white skirt he had seen before, he remembered well, because last time you had worn it was last year dropping the kids off at Steve’s for a sleepover. Oh he remembered it very well, last time your worn it you'd snuggled up to him on a blanket in the far end of the garden, hidden by trees and bushes, only to be seen from the house and gotten a little bit frisky, teasing turned to tickling which turned to Eddie lying on top of you pounding into you at a furious pace with your panties pushed to the side. 

The memories flooded back to him and he realised that if he just moved his hand on your waist down a little bit, and then a little bit more he would find the hem of it and could slip his hands under the fabric to rest his broad palm on the fat of your ass, give you a little squeeze. Before he had time to consider it his eyes cast a glance at your top. Fuck. That brown crochet halter top that he had seen you curled up on the couch making as you watched tv in late January. From his position he could see right over you, tits pushed together by the way the triangles tied behind your neck, could see that one little freckle he always liked to give a kiss, could see that little scar almost hidden on the right. Fuck he wanted to grab them, and kiss them, and suck on your nipples to draw that one little whine at first contact, no he wanted to watch them bounce up and down in you bra as you rode him, no! He wanted to watch them bounce up and down as he sat back on his calves thrusting into you so aggressively that your tits would bounce up and slap you in the face and make you roar out laughing, NO! he wanted to hover over your ribs as you looked up at him with that twinkle in your eyes as you held your tits together, mushing around his cock slipping back and forth in the lube he kept in his nightstand. FUCK. 

He had to look away, something, something that could find his attention, yes the tag on the bottle you were holding, yeah he was gonna read that. Now is not the time to get hard you asshole, she’s only just sat in your lap, for the first time in ages! on your dick… like right on it… no, fuck, you piece of shit, she’s gonna feel if you get hard and she’s not gonna be happy about it. Well she is smiling, she seems really happy.. Yeah so don’t ruin it fucker, remember last night? Yeah exactly. He was fighting with himself as he pretended to read the beer bottle, eyes following as it moved from its place on the arm rest with your hands loosely wrapped around it, followed it up to your lips as he saw you laugh and press your lips to the rim. 

Oh shit those lips he wanted to kiss so badly, wait maybe he could? That's ok right? Kissing? We still kiss? It's not like we don't kiss? Fuck it, if he wanted to kiss his wife, he was going to kiss his wife. 

As you brought the bottle back down to the armrest Eddie moved on instinct, his body working faster than his brain, his hand slunk out from under your arms and up to cup your cheek, causing you to turn to him in question, eyebrows raised awaiting him to say something. He didn't say anything, he only began to pull his hand back, slowly bringing you with him. He closed his eyes, it felt like forever, forever forever forever, until suddenly soft lips on his. Everything was in slow motion as if the world stopped around him as moisturised soft plump lips met his own, barely a craze, just a touch and then more, closer, lips pressing slowly to each other and then at its destination, pressed against your lips in a kiss that made him explode inside. Suddenly your lips drew back and so did you. 

It was just a peck, a simple peck, but it made his heart stop, as well as time, the world and just about everything else around him. A sigh escaped his chest in content as he opened his eyes to see you smile down at him, his own smile quickly matching yours before you drew back and looked back to Simone. His brain was swimming around in a pool in his head, everything was a daze as he watched you lick your lips and grin slightly, turning to him again to whisper “Taste like beer” that cute nose in a scrunch as you spoke to him. 

The daze halted as he chuckled “You too” which earned a smile from you and moved his hand back to splay across your thighs. Finally he turned to the rest of the group and lay notice to Steve a knowing wide grin directed at you, Simone in full ramble as Luke looked up at her in awe, Jeff listening in, and Gareth with an evil smirk on his lips, staring right at him. Eddie's smile faded and was replaced with a sneer directed towards his friend. Gareth's eyes flicked to you and back to Eddie as he mouthed an ooh which made Eddie's loose grip on you tighten immediately and pull you even closer to him, this time not easing up on his hold but insistent on holding you close, as if shielding you from Gareth. 

Lunch came along not soon after, thankfully not as hectic as breakfast as Dustin and Suzie had grilled a bunch of hotdogs of various diets and put them all on one table along with bread, ketchup, mustard and dried onions. Everyone free to get drinks out of the various coolers around the kitchen. 

The rest of the day was very similar to the morning, everyone hustled outside once the temperatures dropped a few degrees. Both you and Eddie had kept an eye on the girls as you mingled with all the parents and friends around the beach until eventually you walked up to Eddie placing your hand gently by his elbow to tell him you were going to go further up and lie down on a blanket and read in the grass. Eddie had taken the role of watching over the kids as they swam in the lake, at first only watching from the waters edge as he spoke to Dustin and Mike until he ran out on the jetty and cannonballed right next to Roxette, hitting the bottom immediately and landing right on his ass bouncing up to be splashed back in the face by Ophelia. She screamed in laughter as he picked her up and threw her away from him. 

When he came up again water dripping down his skin he rejoined Steve and Lucas, as Lucas turned to tell Max something Steve nudged him and cocked his head behind him to the grass “Your wifes asleep” he chuckled as he motioned for Eddie to see you on your stomach, face resting in your crossed arms and book falling from your loosened grasp on it. “Go, I’ll look after the kids” he grinned as Eddie turned back to him. “You sure? I don't wanna-” “Yes I’m sure, just go spend some quality time with your girl” he grinned “Doubt it’ll be much quality time seeing as shes passed out but yeah ok, thanks dude” Eddie patted him on the back as he trudged through the sand, grabbing his towel on the way and patting himself dry. 

Yup you were fast asleep he noticed as he got to the blanket and heard your soft snores, he bent down and picked your book up, dog earring the page, closing it and tossing it down into the grass. He groaned softly as he crouched down, falling flat onto his back next to you. Propping his head up on one hand while the other lay limp against his stomach he stared up at the sky through his now retrieved sunglasses. His gaze broke to turn and look towards you as he heard you stir in your sleep, you twisted your hips to pull the leg facing him up in a bend, knee nudging his hip. You seemed to relax for a few seconds before you grunted and turned to fully lay on your side, hands coming to press together and hold your head up only slightly. 

Once again you relaxed and Eddie watched you amused with a smile on his face until suddenly an annoyed groan left you and the hand not forced against the ground slipped out from under your head shooting out in search of something. You blindly slapped lightly at the blanket before moving and slapping again, and again until your pinky came in contact with his skin, you hand lifted and slapped lightly against Eddie's chest, he had to fight the snort that threatened to fall from his throat as he watched you. 

Finally your hand seemed to find the right place on his chest but surprisingly enough you didn't relax again, instead still hazy with sleep and with your eyes closed you moved on the blanket towards him, forcing your hips forward until you were flush against him. A heavy head thudded to his chest forced an oof to spill from his lips and a thick thigh moved and dropped heavily to drape across him. 

You nestled up against him and finally you seemed to relax. 

Eddie was beaming, the hand previously on his stomach searching for his towel to prop it up under his head and letting him wrap his arms around you to hold you to him. Soft breathing matched up to an even rise and fall of both your chests as Eddie soaked you up. The happiness he was feeling didn't last though, soon enough he too had fallen asleep under the hot sun and your skin against his. 

Both of you awoke with groans as something landed on you, a very wet, very excited Roxette. “Why are you sleeping it's swim time!” she squealed as she rolled off Eddie and sat up. You groaned in pain as you too sat up “Cuz mom and dad are tired Roxy, so please don't jump on us” you told her as you stretched, Eddie doing the same from the ground. “But mom I wanna go play!” she stood up jumping up and down “Ok ok I’m coming hang on” Eddie was about to say something when you stood up and were whisked away by his daughter. 

Dinner was tapas, everybody had brought a dish or some sort of food from the store ready to eat from the get go and was set up this time by someone other than Dustin and Suzie. You talked happily to Robin, Nancy, Will and his boyfriend Winter as you all set out plates, cutlery and food for tiny hands to grab excitedly. You ate in conversation with most of the hellfire club as you sat next to Eddie on a worn leather couch, pressing up to him and letting him give you the occasional kiss to your temple or lips, smiling the whole time. Eventually your plate was finished off and Eddie felt you slump against him after putting your plate on the table. His hand wrapped around your shoulders to rest your head on his for a while until eventually you leaned up and told him you were going to lay down for a bit. 

You left with a squeeze to your hand and a sympathetic smile from your husband. You were planning on just having a lie down or maybe a quick nap but suddenly your clothes were to hot and too tight and too stifling so you quickly changed out of them and threw on the same ragged t-shirt from last night, falling onto the bed, not getting too comfortable because you didn't really want to fall asleep. The universe didn't seem to hear you though and soon you were fast asleep on top of the bed. 

That's how Eddie found you after putting the kids to bed an hour later, knowing they wouldn't sleep with all the excitement of the other kids around but getting them to brush their teeth and change into their pyjamas. They had asked Eddie where you were and why you weren't saying goodnight so Eddie had to explain “Moms not feeling very well so she's resting but she’ll probably come say night night later”. When you told him you were going to your room it seemed like you just needed some quiet but that was clearly not the case when he found you like a log atop the covers. 

He sighed, you needed your rest, the past year of work was clearly catching up to you but yet again he couldn't help the slight disappointment when he found you, he'd gotten hopeful and excited from the day, you'd been a lot more touchy than you ever had been the past few months, cuddling up to him, stealing kisses and it seemed that whenever you were near him you had a need to have some sort of contact, whether it be pressed up against him or his arm around you or even just your hand on his arm or thigh but he had to accept that you were too tired and needed to sleep. 

Carefully he pulled the covers from under you and placed them back on you as you adjusted in your sleep to lie on your side. Just like yesterday he got in next to you and wrapped his arms around you as the big spoon. Falling asleep to the scent of your hair which his nose was nuzzled against. 

This morning the girls actually knocked, waking Eddie from his light slumber to hum a yes at them to come in. Slowly you roused and sat up in bed to listen to your two excited girls tell you all about the cup phones they all made yesterday after dinner and how they had them crisscrossed around the room to talk to each other as Eddie rounded the bed, giving a kiss to your forehead before leaving the room to take a shower. 

You were more relaxed at breakfast now that you knew what was coming and you even enjoyed it, sat at the dining table in conversation with Argyle and his girlfriend Eden, Winter and Jonathan's wife Charlotte who got the group's attention by balancing her cereal bowl on her 8 months pregnant belly which you found out would be her and Jonathan's fourth. 

Across the room Eddie sat in an armchair next to Steve and Gareth “So you and your girl seemed to be very close yesterday” Steve leaned over and dropped his voice, “Yeah pay off? She put out?” Gareth grinned “That threat of me beating you ass is still on the table” Eddie stared at Gareth who only chuckled “But to answer your question, no she was asleep by the time I got to our room” Eddie shrugged, even if Gareth could be an assshole when it came to women he didnt want it to show that he was disappointed, it would only egg him on. 

“Maybe we could do that bonfire thing tonight?” Steve suggested lightly “Besides I wouldn't mind some fun with Nance, she gets so exited when shes drunk its fuckin hilarious” he grinned and looked over towards how wife “Last time she was jumping around imitating a bunny she saw on kids tv” the other two laughed at the picture. 

“Sure, we’ll go into town get some drinks, I think Dustin said he only had beer” Eddie shrugged happily. 

Today was not the different from yesterday, things to do inside and people down at the beach splashing away. “Hey” Eddie bent down to talk to you as you sat on the couch playing shoots and ladders with a few of the kids after lunch “so were all having a bonfire night once the kids have gone to bed” Eddie smiled wide at your happy smile “so me and some of the guys are heading into town to pick some stuff up” you nodded and gave him a kiss before he headed off with Will and Dustin. 

Dinner passed and you were pleasantly surprised that tiredness hadn’t overcome you. All the parents tucked their kids into bed and made a clear point that if anything were to happen they were just outside and to come get them if they needed to. 

Eddie called your name with a yo you in here? as he knocked on the bathroom door nearest your bedroom, instead of answering him you unlocked the door and peeped out an intense stare directed his way “Sorry you can't come in without a warrant” you broke out into a grin as you went to shut the door, Eddies hand grasping onto the wood and forcing it open in a fit of giggles as you tried to fight him. Finally he stumbled in, almost knocking you over and catching you in his arms. 

He locked the door behind him as he looked down at you “Mmm you smell nice” he hummed as his eyes took in your bare face, damp to match you hair, you giggled “Just had a shower” you explained as you slid out of his hold to pick your clothes off the floor. Eddie was slightly miffed as you brushed past him in just your towel and unlocked the door but he followed nonetheless. 

Walking behind you as you tread carefully over the floorboards, hips swaying from side to side as you walked, Eddie leaned back to get a full view of you, hair wet and dripping water over your shoulders, thighs peeking out from under the towel, only long enough to cover your ass, eyes rolling to the back of his head as the towel pulled up slightly to reveal a peak of the bottom. Within an instant his hands circled your waist and picked you up, leaning back on his feet to pull you up off the floor. You squealed at him to let you down as you giggled, only dropping you back down to land softly when he thought he might fall over backwards from bending to steep. 

“What was that?” you whispered as you began walking again, Eddie awkwardly tumbling along with his arms still around you “You just looked so liftable” he whispered back biting your cheek mischievously. You snorted an ok and opened the door to your bedroom. 

Today you had been in a good mood, it seemed the long night sleep and absence of pressure to be productive had taken to you and you were still on a high from it. So pleased that you didn't even let your mind work up into a frenzy as Eddie let you go and flopped onto the bed. 

You didn't think anything of it as you dropped the towel to change, the fact that Eddie hadn’t seen you naked since before christmas didn't even cross your mind. 

Stood with your back to him you rooted through your bag to find a comfortable pair of sweats and a hoodie, preparing for the cold outside now that the sun had gone beyond the horizon. Eddie sat up straight in an instant. Eyes bulging wide and trained on you as the towel dropped to the floor when you found your clothes. He swallowed thick as you moved to another bag to look for underwear. 

Holy shit. You were naked, like fully naked, no towel, no nothing covering you. Fuck he hadn’t seen this sight in over six months and here you were bathed in the moonlight and dim lighting of the old ceiling lamp, gold cast over your body, spotlighting the smooth skin, and rolls of your back, the stretch marks and cellulite of your thighs, the dimples in your back, every little colour and inked tattoo that showed in your skin. All out for him to see, all for him. 

You turned with your clothes clutched to your chest to see a pin straight Eddie with wide awestruck eyes, mouth open in shock. “What?” you chuckled confused as you walked over to the foot of the bed, dropping your clothes onto the fabric. Eddie's brain stopped working as your front was revealed to him, soft breasts sloping down in a natural drop, a sliver of metal and nipples almost out of sight, round and calling to him like two beams of light in the night, your soft stomach spilling down, a patch of hair covering your puffy mound, framed by your soft doughy thighs. Fuck he just wanted to grip and suck and lick and kiss everything he saw right now, matter of fact he wanted to get down on his hands and knees and worship the ground you walked on as well as whatever higher entity out there that had created you. 

You started to grow slightly uncomfortable under his gaze, suddenly feeling extremely exposed, an urge to cover yourself growing strong. In a rush you reached for your underwear to pull the black brazilian cut lace panties over your ass and hips. You looked over at Eddie again to see his mouth open and close as he blinked, awfully resembling a fish, it only encouraged you to get dressed faster, clasping the black bra and spinning it around to pull the straps up your arms. Once again you looked at Eddie, whose expression still had not changed, you threw the t-shirt over your head and jumped into your sweats, pulling the hoodie over yourself as you looked back. “Umm” Eddie started but trailed off “I'm going to the bathroom” you blurted out and within seconds you had practically ran out of the door. 

Eddie stayed still, blinking and trying to wrap his head around what he had just seen. Finally he snapped out of it and shook his head, falling over on his side with a loud groan, pulling at the sheet to cover his face. What is wrong with you?! Your wife is naked for the first time in fucking forever and you just sit there?! He groaned even louder as he smushed his face into the comforter. 

Finally you came to the realisation that you had just been naked in front of Eddie for the first time in a really long time, you rushed back into the bathroom and sat down on the toilet with your face in your hands. Well clearly you weren't just ugly on the inside now, you were ugly on the outside too. Why else would he just sit there and stare at you like you'd grown a second head? UGH what were you going to do?! You had finally loosened up, you were happy within yourself for the first time in ages and felt comfortable around Eddie again, you clearly should have had more control over yourself. He no longer found you attractive, Jesus Christ why were you kidding yourself?

A knock on the door broke you out of your spiral as you weakly asked a yes, the person outside of the door cleared their throat. It was Eddie. Oh, no, no no no no no. “Um, uh you wanna go down? Uh Mike just said the fire is lit” his voice sounded strained, uncomfortable. He was uncomfortable because he’d seen you naked and didnt like it, and now you had nowhere to hide AAAARGHHHH. “Yeah sure” your voice was broken as you spoke. 

Slowly slowly you stand, slowly slowly you step towards the door, and slowly slowly you turn the nob. Eyes pinned to the floor as you walk out of the door, you see Eddie's feet as you walk past them and walk down the hall, you hear him follow behind you. This is the worst feeling, so much worse than coming home late from work hungry, or being in too big of a crowd, or too tight clothes on a hot sweaty day, this unease is so much worse. 

Time ticks by slowly as you feel like you're walking to your execution, feet dragging across the floor shameful as Eddie walks behind you. Anxiety, heartbreak, stress, unease, insecurity all bubble up in your chest, threatening to bubble up to the surface through hot tears if you let yourself. You feel it in your chest, plummeting down to your stomach and spreading all through your body like slim black vines as if a disease, darkening everything inside you. Until a touch, a slight intentional braze of fingers that send sparks, gold touching at your hip and overpowering some of the black. Gold vines take over throughout your hip as you feel a soft hand grasp onto it, guiding you down the stairs. 

Another spark of gold bleeding out into your vines on the other as Eddie holds softly onto your hips as your feet hit the ground floor. Gold vines that threaten to overpower the black and meet in the middle just below your belly button. Your breath hitches and speeds up in anxiety. 

One hand leaves your hip and the gold dies off as quickly as it came, as the first on your right hip slips to hold the small of your back, the gold follows, bleeding from its starting point and stretching as you bend down to slip into your sneakers. The hand never wavers as Eddie leans down to slip his own shoes on, the heat from it causing the gold to continue without the order of touch, spreading slowly through your back, creeping up your spine in a shiver. 

He opens the door to near 20 people scattered around a brazen fire, reds and oranges contrasting the deep dark blues of the sky and the shade its cast around them all. You step cautiously down the now dark green stairs, feet hitting the gravel before they hit grass as you veer off to the side away from the parking lot. “Hey” Eddie whispered beside you as you walk, coming to a stop as you turn to look up at him. Eyes glassy and scared at what his words might do to you. Just as he opens his mouth “Hey!” Robin runs over and pulls you off by the arm so she can show you something. 

Eddie stands frozen, What just happened? he was about to apologise to you for being so weird. His feet drive him forward however and before he can think it over he’s by the mass of people, eyes zoning in on the table of drinks set up he makes a beeline for it. Pouring a shot of tequila he downs it, and then a second, before he can get ahead of himself he picks up a beer can, popping the tab he scans the crowd. His eyes find Steve not far away and quickly he's marching over “I need to talk to you” he says with a grip on the man's arm almost pulling him away from the scene. 

A few metres away from the nearest cluster of figures he stops “Dude what's up?” Steve chuckles, confused “I just saw her naked” is all Eddie can say, Steve's confusion just deepens on his face “For the first time in over like six months” he widens his eyes willing Steve to understand. “Oh, oooh how’d it go?” Steve grins. “Fucking terrible!” Eddie shouts exasperated, quickly straightening up with eyes wide turning to see if someone heard. Everyones too fixated on their own conversation as he looks over at the people around the campfire but he finds you at the drinks table with Robin and Nancy cheering you on as you seem to be taking three shots in a row. 

He turns back to Steve “How was it terrible?” Stevs confused again as he stares up at the taller man “Because Steve, she took her towel off and I just sat there” Steves face shows once again that he doesn’t understand “I just sat there, gawking at her like I’d never seen tits before, like some fuckin’ teenager” he grits. “Oh. Wait so walk me through it” he took a swig of his own can, some fruity cider. “Ok. So she was in the room, well actually, no, here” Steve frowns at Eddie's backtracking “So she was in the bathroom so I knocked on it and she stuck her head out grinning saying I needed a restraining order” Steve smirked but chose not to make a comment “And so she liked tried to close the door and I tried to open it and get in. Ah before you say anything it was just like flirty fun, nothing weird” Steve nodded “And she was all giggly, then we left the bathroom and I like picked her up and she was all giggly then too” “Ok ok” Steve nodded along “Then when we got to the room I just sat on the bed and she just like dropped the towel while she was looking for her clothes, then she turned and I think she said something I can't remember, but then she started like pulling all her clothes on, said she was going to the bathroom and ran off” he finished his recounting of the recent events with a few large gulps of his beer, almost downing half of it. 

“Sounds like you freaked her out dude. Did you like explain why you were being so weird?” Steve tipped his head back to finish the rest of his cider. “Well I was gonna but then Robin just came up and ran off with her” both of them looked over to see you now stood with Robin, Nancy, Max and El a large glass of wine in your hand. 

“Just go up and talk to her now, explain” Eddie screwed his face up at the thought of pulling you away to awkwardly explain why he just sat there “Listen, Nancy gets insecure about her body sometimes maybe she is too” Steve shrugged as they looked back to each other “She's like never ever insecure though, and I don't even think its hiding, she likes her body ya know” the rest of Eddies beer was slung down his throat. “Yeah but you might have made her insecure dude” “Ugh don't say that!” Eddie groaned, his beer was gone he needed something to fiddle with, to distract him, patting his pockets he found his packet of cigarettes, ones he usually kept out of view so the kids wouldn't see him smoking. He flicked his zippo and took a long breath once the cigarette was lit. 

“I’m serious dude, it's not just the first time you've seen her naked it's the first time she's been naked in front of you, might be kinda scary” 

“Since when do you know all about women?”

“Wel-” 

“Don't start” Eddie held his finger up to silence him. 

“Just go talk to her ok?” 

“Fine, but I’m gonna finish this up first, think you can go get me a beer? Don't really wanna look like im ignoring her” 

“Sure” Steve walked off as Eddie turned his back to the fire to crane his neck back in frustration, looking up at the sky. 

“Steve used to be like that with me” Nancy giggled in the huddle as Steve walked up to grab a beer and another cider. “I used to be like what?” he grinned as he leaned over the table “Butt out dingus” Robin stuck her tongue out “Nothing babe” Nancy hid a grin behind her solo cup as she looked away. Steve narrowed his eyes in suspicion at his wife “It's just girltalk” you smiled at him which made Steve's face break out into an expression you couldn't read. 

“Alright well” Steve spun on his heel and  power walked back to Eddie “You better talk to her now, I’m pretty sure I overheard the girls talking about it” Steve rushed as he forced the cold can into Eddie's hands. “Oh for fucks sake” he groaned as he took the beer and began walking over to the table. He saw as Robin awkwardly hushed the group as she laid eyes on him which made his nerves bubble up, yeah they were definitely talking about it. 

“Drink all that beer that fast?” Robin chuckled as Eddie neared “Mmhmn no” Eddie held his unopened can up for show as he arrived behind you “Can I talk to you?” he bend down as he dropped his voice lower, breath fanning over your ear as he spoke. “Ok” you whispered back meekly. He had no idea about girl code, and had absolutely no clue what the looks all the others were giving you meant as you set your plastic wine glass on the table and turned to walk away from them. 

You walked silently side by side as he nonverbally steered you towards the cars, the three shots and half glass of wine causing for a pleasant buzz, dampening some of the anxiety you felt “Um you want a beer?” he asked quietly as he held out the can towards you when you came to a stop by your own car “No thanks” you mumbled as Eddie seemed to cage you in at the hood of the car. You frowned surprised when he flung the can behind him to softly roll into the grass, he needed his hands free for this and he hadn't had a chance to drink it before he came over. 

“So what you wanna talk about?” you fiddled with the string of the cuffs of your worn out hoodie which was actually Eddies as you leaned back to prop yourself slightly on the hood of the car. “Um I just wanted to uh tell you I'm sorry for just like sitting there super awkward before” he looked down at you as you stared into his stomach unwilling to meet his gaze. “If I’m being honest I was just like shocked, we haven't really uh done.. that, in like a long time and it was just sudden” he saw you physically curl in on yourself which made him freak out “No no not like bad sudden, good sudden” you finally met his gaze, looking up at him confused “Fuck, I just mean like I’ve missed you and my brain just like short circuited” he tried to get you to understand. 

A breath he didnt know he had been holding finally escaped his lips as he saw a small smile tug on your lips “I dont wanna make you like uncomfortable, but when I saw you I was just like, holy fuck, she’s naked and I think this is the best thing I’ve ever seen” the grin that spread on his face was a relieved one as you snorted a laugh “Im serious, like baby” his hands came to rest on your shoulder “You are so fuckin’ sexy and just every part of you is like some greek goddess has sculpted you or something. I’m totally ok with us not being intimate, even though I do miss you I just want you to feel safe and comfortable, and for you to be happy but I really do miss you. Obviously I miss you like as a person, you're my wife, and the mother of my children and I love you so much, but like above that fuuuuuck I miss being with you” he groaned as he thought about how long it had been. 

Something swelled within you at his words, you wanted to laugh at his phrasing of being sculpted by a greek goddess but the meaning behind the words were just too flustering and sincere. And following up with that stupid wording he knew made you weak in the knees, mother of my children, yeah you liked that. You were the mother of his children, his wife. 

“I’m sorry” you whispered as Eddies hands travelled down to rub up and down your arms “It’s just been a lot recently, in my head and work and all and I pushed you away I’m sorry” Eddie manoeuvred his knee to push yours apart so he could stand between them and be closer to you “Don’t say sorry, you have nothing to be sorry for. We’ve both just been shit at telling each other things” as he towered over you you craned your neck back to see him properly, a grin spread across your face as you said in a whiny voice “Communication is key”. 

Eddie laughed and brought his arms to wrap around your shoulders, pressing your face into his chest as he hugged you, kissing the top of your head as your own arms wrapped around his waist. You both lingered for a while as you hugged each other tight until Eddies arms loosed and he pulled back to look down at you again “While I do want to know what's been going through your pretty little head lately, why don't we go enjoy the fire and talk more when we get back?” you nodded with a smile. Eddie turned to walk back with you but spun around as you called his name. “One more thing” “Mm?” you grasped onto the fabric of his sweatshirt and pulled him down towards you. 

Lips meeting his in a desperate hungry kiss you wrapped your arms around Eddie's neck as his hands went to your hips, holding you softly to keep himself upright. He thought you were just going in for a long kiss when you broke off but soon enough your lips were back on him again as your fingers snaked through his locks. Another kiss and a tug at his hair had him groaning into your mouth as his hands squeezed tighter at your hips. A few more kisses and he felt your tongue poke softly at his lips telling him to open them. He pulled you flush against him as tongues swiped at each other, his hands moving from your hips past your back to grab angrily at you ass, pulling you up to stand and pushing your hips against his, forcing his hard cock against your mound, groaning at the contact and pressing even harder against you. 

You pulled away from his lips and quickly out of his grasp “Ok now I’m happy” you laced your fingers with his as he stood dumbstruck, you began walking pulling him along with you “What??” his voice was slightly loud as he stumbled along after you “What? I said one more thing, that was my thing” you turned to grin at him wickedly “Oh you little-” he let go of you to run after you and lift you up off your feet as you squealed. The second he let you down you ran off with Eddie hot on your tail, tackling you almost immediately and turning you in his hold to face him so he could attack your hips with wiggling fingers, laughing as you shrieked from the tickling. 

He ceased his attack on your sides as you stepped closer to the group, wrapping his arms around you once again and stepping up behind you to join the group around the drinks table. Steve gave him a knowing smirk as you bent over still attached to Eddie to retrieve a beer for him from the cooler on the ground and your wine, you giggled as he shoved the hand hold the ice cool beer under your hoodie to press against your warm stomach, fighting to move his hands away from you. “OOH smores! Come on!” Robin beckoned the group to sit in the half circle of logs around the fire, all squeezing together to fit as Robin planted herself on the ground to fish marshmallows out of ita bag. 

“May I interest you in a shot of everclear mi ladies?” Gareth grinned as he stumbled over to you, Eddie, Nancy and Steve on one of the longs “Nah nah” Eddie waved the hand not wrapped around you in dismissal, “We got kids you dummy, gotta get up in the morning” Steve rolled his eyes at him. “More for me!” Gareth swiped all four each one after the other “I am NOT on duty to take care of this one!” Eddie held a hand up in the air as Gareth finished his last one. “Whaaaat? You don't wanna be my daddy?!” Gareth whined as he toppled over onto Eddie, Eddie’s hand coming to push him off, pressing hard against his stomach while everyone else laughed. 

“Go sit down you drunk” Eddie motioned for Gareth to sit down next to Steve. “Oh hey Rob’s can you get me a vodka coke?” You smiled as the woman in question pushed herself off the ground, she gave you a thumbs up as Eddie leaned in “Vodka? How much have you drank already?” His breath fanned once again against you ear as he spoke to you in a low murmur “Eh its fine, I’m not planning on getting drunk” you waved him off “Mhm” Eddie hummed sarcastically as you grinned up at him. 

“Jesus Robin how much did you put in here” your face scrunched up as you took a sip, you didn't particularly mind the taste of alcohol but you hadn't expected it to taste so incredibly strong “Like 80% vodka 20% coke” she grinned a dopey mischievous grin as she found her seat again “Chug it ya wont taste it” her grin widened even more “Come on chug chug chug!” she clapped her hands together as a few of the girls chimed in “You don't have to” Eddie searched your face with serious eyes “No no it's fine” your grin matched Robins as you looked up at him before swallowing the whole of the contents in the red solo cup. You cheered along excitedly as you crushed it and threw it down onto the ground. 

Eddie felt you sway slightly as you sat up straight, well it seemed like the getting tipsy had gone a little too well, no doubt by the end of the evening you would be hammered and pass out again on the bed. It's fine he told himself, we’ll just do something.. another day.  “Yo lets go get the chairs it's getting kinda cramped over here” Dustin walked over with Lucas and Mike on his tail “Oh sure. You gonna be ok?” he bent down to ask you as you stared up at the sky in a daze. “Huh? Oh yeah yeah” yup you were definitely drunk as you tried to focus your eyes on his face, he had a slight suspicion Robin hadnt put one single brand of vodka in your cup before handing it to you. “Nance could you..” he trailed off as he motioned to you, asking her to keep an eye on you, she nodded happily as he stood up, hands hovering around you to make sure you didn't fall over. 

When he saw you could sit by yourself he grabbed into his sweatshirt by the collar and pulled it over his head, the fire was getting too warm for him, dropping it down next to you to occupy his place he got up and followed the others down to the edge of the beach.

“Oh!” you squealed as you planted a hand on his hoodie to feel the square cardboard box, digging through his pocket in mass concentration you managed to free the cigarettes and flipped open the top to see his zippo and a few cigarettes. Pulling the zippo and a cigarette out you turned to face Nancy, Tracy and Simone again as you lit the cigarette. Happily taking the next red solocup handed your way by Tracy. Taking a long breath and giggling as the nicotine swam up to your head, mind feeling floaty as you swayed from side to side, even more so as you sipped what seemed to be more vodka coke, this time not as strong. 

“Aw man who let you-” Eddie cut himself off as returned a few minutes later, plucking the zippo and carton out of your hands after placing a chair down in the half circle of logs. You cackled as you watched him shove the packet out of view, this time into his jeans “Baby you know how you get when you smoke drunk” he grabbed into your free hand helping you stand up as you sucked down your second cigarette, almost empty solo cup left behind on the log. He led you back to the chairs to see one empty chair left “Really dude?” Gareth grinned as he spread out into the chair next to the empty one, revelling in Eddie's annoyance “Fine” Eddie breathed “Wait here” he told you as he turned to get his sweatshirt. 

Gareth mumbled something to you as you swayed, trying not to fall over “What?” you almost shouted as you leaned forward, placing your hands on the armrest of Gareth's chair and dropping your head down to hear him. He said something again but your mind was too  fuzzy to understand as you brought the cigarette back up to your lips. “Gareth stop flirting with my wife” you heard Eddie grit behind you as his hands slithered around your hips to bring you down with him as he sat down in the chair. “Whoo!” you squealed as you fell into Eddie's lap, flinging your hands into the air as if you were on an amusement park ride. 

When you’d brought them back down you took another drag of the cigarette, closing your eyes as you exhaled, falling backwards onto Eddie's shoulder as your head began to spin back and back with the kick. 

Eddie chuckled as he plucked the tobacco from your fingers and began talking to Will and Winter, he knew this was going to happen, everytime you drank and smoked your head began to spin, same with weed and smoking, if he wasn't careful enough you would fall flat on your ass with the dizziness. Suddenly you shot up, leaning forward “Oh Ophi loves that magazine!” you must have picked up on Winter talking about some fashion magazine Eddie hadn't heard of before. Soon you were in a deep conversation about the fashion industry and how hiphop had had an effect on it but within seconds Eddie zoned out. 

You kept swaying back and forth, body vibrating with laughter as you flung yourself from side to side varying between leaning over to listen intently as catching up with your brain to form words. You were clearly quite out of it, wrapped up in your conversation and thinking nothing of it but Eddie did. The first few times you moved he didn't pay it any mind, but soon you were almost squirming above him, no longer just swaying but moving your ass, soon enough you were situated right on his crotch. 

Eddie tried to pay attention to what Will was telling him, he really did but you just kept moving around, pressing even harder against him as you relaxed and dropped your weight down. The friction was just too much. Can she feel this? Does she even know she's moving so much? No she can’t feel I’m hard she’s too drunk. Fuck please don’t realize, shit. He wrapped his arms tighter around you, subtly trying to press you up against him more. What are you doing there’s people around! Fuuuuuck, you moved a little just as he pulled you flush to his chest and now he was situated right between your cheeks, pressure coming from all sides. He snapped his head when he heard you hum, could you actually feel him? Were you doing this on purpose? 

Suddenly you turned your head and before he even had a chance to think about it your lips were on his in a hard kiss. As you broke apart he pulled away to frantically look around, Will and Winter were no longer next to you, he noticed them at the drinks table, now talking to Suzie, everyone else were in conversation all in their own worlds, drinking or making smores. Gareth had passed out next to him, Steve listened with a grin as Nancy talked excitedly, Jonathan and Charlotte were whispering to each other, matching smiles as their noses pressed to each others. 

He found your eyes again, looking down at him with a drunken smile, eyes darting down to his lips with your pupils blown wide as glossed over, he gulped. That was a sight he hadn't seen in a long time, the want, need, in your eyes as you looked at him. You leant down again, capturing him in a sloppy kiss, he groaned into your mouth as you wriggled in his lap, turning to face him better. Hands coming up to wrap your arms around his shoulder as you sat twisted to face him. Lips smacking against each other desperately, hands planting firmly on your hips and squeezing, trying to twist you, and pull your chest to his. 

Finally you broke apart with a heavy breath, Eddie's closed eyes opened slowly to admire your face with a smile. Before he had the chance though, you were sliding off him and getting to your feet with a grin, Eddie groaned and toppled over, hands coming to his crotch as his forehead almost nudged his knee. It had been a natural reaction, to cover his boner, now that he had he realised hiding it just made his problem all the more noticeable. He gave Steve the finger as he cackled at him just as you skipped off saying something about getting a drink. 

Clearing his throat he had no other option but to follow his drunken wife, he reached for his sweatshirt that had been hung on the armrest and pulled it over him, making an effort to pull it down low in the front. Reluctantly he pulled himself out of the chair, his slow steps turning into large strides as he saw what you were doing. Within a second he was next to you pulling the bottle of everclear out of your hands “Hey!” you whined as you set your solo cup down. “Babe this is 95% alcohol, and I am not having you throw up all over me tonight” he set the bottle down and gathered you in a hug.

“Mean, you dont wanna take care of me? I see how it is” you joked as you made a show of untangling yourself from him, only making Eddie hold onto you tighter. “Of course I wanna take care of you” I’ll show you how fucking good I can take care of you “But I’d rather have you not throw up if I can” you made a mocking whine which caused a chuckle bubble up from Eddies chest. 

“Let's get you some juice or something yeah?” he grinned down at you as you nodded “Jesus christ all these drinks and not a single thing alcohol free” he frowned as he inspected the table, all the mixers now gone. “There's some cartons inside” Dustin chipped in “Thanks dude”.

So Eddie was turning you in his arms to hold at your hips as he led you steadily up to the house, laughing as you stumbled and almost tripped over your own feet, slowly he led you up the steps and through the door. “Okay” he breathed as he walked you to the kitchen island, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you up to sit on the wood “Oh my god!” you squealed as he lifted you “I forgot you could do that! Do it again!” you squealed. Eddie shushed you quietly “I will if you keep your voice down a little, the kids are asleep downstairs” he pecked your lips as he turned to open the fridge “Oh riiiight” you leaned towards his back with an exaggerated whisper. 

Just as Eddie turned he saw you about to fall over the edge, shooting a hand out to catch your arm, placing the juice on the table and coming around to hold onto both your arms and coax you upright. “Ok my little fall risk whose like a newborn baby that can't support its head” you snorted loudly as Eddie grabbed the juicebox next to you and poked the straw through the seal. Legs pressing up against the table to stand between your thighs, keeping you sitting up “Here, drink this” he held out the juicebox to you, which you took and drank all within one breath, slurping noises within the carton as you finished it. 

Wiping your mouth you looked back up to him with a wide grin, collapsing into his chest and mushing your cheek to the green fabric. Eddie chuckled as his hands came to circle your back “I think it's time for you to go to bed yeah?” he whispered as you pushed yourself closer to him humming in agreement “But you have to carry me” Eddie laughed. He hadn’t carried you for a while, but he’d like to think he was still strong enough, lean muscles hidden under all his clothes from hard work at the auto shop. The only thing was that you were very drunk and he was afraid he’d drop you. “Ok” he whispered, marvelling in your giggle as he bent his knees and wrapped his arms around your thighs, throwing you over his shoulder. 

“What? You told me to carry you” he drummed on your ass as he began walking past the dining table earning a drunken laugh from you. 

Somehow he managed to make it up the stairs and down the hall, throwing you playfully onto the bed, just as he was about to pull away from you to stand up two hands fisted at his sweatshirt, pulling him onto the bed sloppily as your lips connected to his. As you continued kissing him he moved, never disconnecting his lips from yours as he lay himself between your thighs. 

His brain stopped as he heard your soft moan against him as he pushed himself flush against your clothed cunt. He needed to hear that sound again. He thrusted his hips hard against yours to hear your moan again this time slightly louder, quick to muffle it by kissing you harder. One of his hands on your hips travelled quickly under your hoodie to first at your breast over your bra. FUUUUUCKKK he hadn’t gotten to feel your tits in so long and now that he did it felt like fucking heaven. 

Grabbing onto you desperately as he set a pace of thrusting his hard cock against you, sloppily swiping his tongue against yours. Soft groans and moans from both of you muffled by each other as you made out. Eddie couldn't begin to explain how good this felt, kissing you, touching you, it was too much for him. His pace quickened against you as you pulled at his hair, other hand pulling at the hem of his sweatshirt. Getting the hint he sat up on his calves to rip his shirts off, cock throbbing with eagerness as your hands travelled lightly over his happy trail, past his stomach and up his chest, hand grabbing at his neck pulling him back to you. 

His lips connected to yours again as he cupped your face and let your hand trail up his side and grip at his shoulder. He pulled away to breathe, staring down at your face, eyes blown wide and filled with lust, kiss bitten lips, hips squirming for friction against him. You were drunk, he knew he shouldn't be doing this when you were drunk but he couldn't help himself, he hadn't felt you in ages and now that he’d gotten a taste he couldn't stop himself. 

Sitting up again he pulled at your hoodie, urging you to sit up so he could pull it off you, nimble fingers eagerly unclipping your bra before pushing you back against the bed. Breath cut short as his nose pushed against your cheek and his lips connected to yours. His hips gave a particularly hard thrust as his hand went back to squeezing at your now naked breast, barbell piercing pinched between his fingers as his other hand propped him up, causing you to moan against him as the zipper of his jeans caught against your clit, igniting a fire within your core you hadn't felt for a while. 

Your moan egged him on to thrust even harder as his lips relentlessly kissed yours. He heard a knock at the door but chose to ignore it, he had you here, in your bed for the week, topless, kissing him, moaning for him, wanting him, there was nothing he would do to stop this moment. The knock came again and he pulled away yelling an angry “WHAT?!” into the room. Aggravated and annoyed that there was something outside of this room, the world that had stopped around him, that needed him more than you did right now, more than he needed you. 

It showed on his face, the annoyance which dropped immediately as well as his heart as he heard the low scared whisper “Daddy?” his forehead dropped to yours as he closed his eyes, breathing out a sigh “Yeah?” he called without moving from his comfortable position against you. “Um.. I peed” the voice whispered shamefully, Roxette on the other side of the door, no doubt clutching her teddy bear close to her as she called for her dad. 

Eddie sighed against you as you let out a low giggle, the whole situation was kind of funny. Eddie straining against his jeans and boxers, frustrated and only thinking of you naked below him and his daughter interrupting to tell him she peed herself. 

“Coming!” he moved slightly above you, staring down in to your eyes as he whispered “Don't go anywhere I’ll be right back” a hard kiss to your lips as he scrambled off you, making no effort to cover his bare chest as he walked to the door, opening it and slipping out you heard Roxy on the other side of the door ask curiously “Where’s mom?” “Uh she’s sleeping”. Boner gone, and everything else that surrounded you, gone for the moment as he took his daughter into the bathroom, placing her in the shower as he ran to retrieve a fresh change of clothes and bedding in your room, groaning as he saw you now on the bed in only a pair of panties. Rushing as fast as he could to change the sheets, his daughter and then soak them all off and hang them up outside to dry. 

The five minutes he thought it would take stretched to a near half hour as he was caught up having to explain to multiple people why he was hanging bedding up and then staying with Roxette as she begged him to stay till she drifted off. 

Finally he made it back to your room, taking a heavy breath in preparation before opening the door, heart dropping as he found you naked atop the covers, on your side, and fast asleep. 

He loved his daughters but could they be more of a cockblock?! He went through the same motions as yesterday, tucking you in and shuffling in next to you to wrap his arms around you. He had to remind himself that there were five days left of this trip, plenty of opportunities to get you alone.

You woke up confused, head throbbing and.. naked? Why were you naked? You frowned as you tried to remember last night: Getting dressed and feeling insecure, shots, talking to Eddie about it, more drinking, something in the kitchen and oh right you and Eddie made out shirtless but you couldn't remember anything else. “Hey Eddie” you nudged the man behind you who groaned “Eds” your shook him slightly “What?” he grumbled behind you “Did we have sex last night?” you turned in his arms to face him as he opened his eyes “We were about to but Roxette peed herself” he murmured, there was a hint of annoyance and frustration in his voice as he recounted last nights events before nuzzling into your shoulder and pulling you tighter against him. “Oh” you breathed as you hand found his back, “Total cockblock” he mumbled against your skin drawing a snort from your throat.

So you were about to have sex with Eddie last night, for the first time in over six months. You found as you thought about it that you weren’t totally against that idea, it felt strange thinking about it, for so long you’d set up walls to block him out and now you felt like you didn't want them there anymore. They were in your way. 

A knock at the door pulled you out of your thoughts “Just a minute baby!” you called as you scrambled to get away from Eddie, turning to look down at the floor, Eddie's Metallica t-shirt that lay inside his sweatshirt was the closest, you hastily pulled it to you, throwing it over your head as you sat up against the headboard. “Yeah come in!” you called to the door as you felt Eddie's hand fall limp on your thigh. 

Ophelia and Roxette shuffled through the door, Ophelia going straight for her clothes and Roxette climbed onto the bed, laying her head in your lap and onto Eddie's hand. “Dad moooove” she shoved at his hand as he grunted in his sleep, flicking his hand in an attempt to move her head away “Daaad” she whined as she pushed at his hand, his hand slid down to hold your knee instead. 

“I heard you had a little accident, you ok baby?” you stroked her hair as she settled back in your lap “Mm peed myself” she pouted “But no one saw so I think its ok” she told you. “And your dad cleaned you up you ungrateful” Eddie mumbled the rest of his sentence into the pillow as he rolled onto his stomach. “Oh, yeah dad helped” 

Soon enough everyone was dressed and downstairs, “So!” Dustin clapped his hands together, gaining the attention of the room “Today is waterpark day!” he referred to the plan he had already set in place. Kids excitedly shovelling food into their mouths after the walkthrough of the day before running to their parents rooms to get dressed and ready. 

Roxy was very excited about her new swimsuit, a blue flowery two piece with a blouse resembling top, but huffed when Eddie told her to come over so he could put sunscreen on her before they went out because she’d want to jump in the water as soon as they got to the waterpark. 

Bags were packed, cars were started and everyone changed as 10 cars and two minivans rolled out onto the road. Setting up camp in a cluster of beach chairs under parasols plans were made. All the kids were very excited, making it quite difficult to get them all gathered and keep them from running off. “Mom I don’t wanna wear the floaters!” Roxette whined as you blew the arm puffs up for her. “Baby you have to” popping the cap closed you started with the other “But Ophelia doesn’t have hers!” She stomped on the ground “Yeah but Ophelia's older she knows how to swim” you explained as you coaxed her over to stand between you knees “I can swim too! No! I don’t wanna!” She ripped her arm away from you as you held it “Baby look a bunch of the other ones are wearing them” you pointed over at the other parents putting arm puffs on their own kids, Eddie stood nearby lathering sunscreen on your eldest. “Fine!” She whined as she let you pull one up her forearm “Be good and you’ll get an ice cream later” you grinned as her face broke out into a toothy smile “Ok!” She happily accepted her fate and let you put the other arm puff on her. 

Argyle and Eden excitedly signed up for chaperoning the kids as well as Robin and a cautious Vickie, Lukas, Mike, Dustin and Suzie joining in as they set off with the kids for a waterslide, Steve and Eddie telling them they would catch up with them. 

You, Nancy, Simone, Tracy, her daughter Ariana, El, Max and Charlotte all huddled together on the beach chairs, lounging as you looked over the waterpark. Will and Winter walked off to get some fancy waterpark drinks that caught their eye as Eddie, Steve, Luke, Gareth and Jeff looked over the map of the waterpark. 

“Oh what a beautiful day!” Nancy smiled brightly as she sat down with baby Dustin in her lap, Simone undid her beach wrap and sat down in a cheeky black bathing suit with straps lining up to her hips, halter top neckline with an open back. “Oh it is hot!” she commented as a few of the other girls cheered at her. “We really doing bathing suits?” Charlotte asked cautiously “Oh come on girls we don't know these people who cares?” Simone smiled brightly as she took her sunglasses off and dropped them onto her wrap on the ground, “Yeah you're right who cares? I've been working on this six pack all spring!” Charlotte pulled her cover up off, thrusting her pregnant belly for show under her punch pink pregnancy dress bathing suit “Yeah baby got front!” she laughed as the girls cheered her on, “Come on Y/N its your turn to strip!” she grinned as she sat back down “Oh no I don't know” you shyed away. 

The swimsuit you were wearing today was not one you were extremely comfortable in, it had been a gift from your friend and you brought it with you just in case, but your bikini had been haphazardly shoved into a ball in your room out of sight and out of mind and therefore not washed deeming it unwearable as it began to smell. This one was a blood red one piece instead, the hem was high on your hips and practically a thong at the back, low cut in the back and round cups pushing your tits together above an upside down triangle showcasing some skin and the undersides of your boobs. “Oh come on! Like Simone said no one cares!” Nancy grinned as she clapped, the others joining in and clapping along. “Oh ok!” they cheered as you stood up and made a show of dropping your towel and filing it onto your chair, even going as far as a little spin. 

Not far away Gareth whistled, causing the group of guys bent over the map to look up, Eddie with his back to you asked “What?” following Gareth's eyes, turning around to see you throwing your towel away and spinning around. He swallowed. Have I seen that before? I don't think so, is it new? his eyes scanned your body, cheeky thong tucked between your ass cheeks, tits pushed together round. “You sure you still set on this marriage thing? Cuz if not I’ll happily take her off your hands. Get her on her knees for me.” Eddie turned back around to see Gareth grinning. 

“Alright that's enough” Eddie lunged “No!” Gareth screeched as he ducked and took off towards you all, scuttling between plastic lounge chairs to stand behind yours which you now occupied. Eddie stopped by your feet as Gareth hopped from side to side “What’s going on?” you asked confused, other girls chiming in as Eddie matched Gareth's movements “If you say one more word I will personally see to it that you're six feet under by the end of the day” Eddie gritted through his teeth. “Eddie!” you shouted, shocked at his words. 

Gareth suddenly became bold “Nah you're too much of a softy” he grinned as he stilled and leaned over the back of your chair, making a show of peeping down you to look at your tits “HEY! Stop looking at my wife!” he shouted, making you turn in confusion to look up at Gareth who quickly disappeared out of view as he ran again. Eddie followed him shouting “You wanna see how much of a softy I am?!” and just like that both of them were out of sight. 

You turned back to the rest “What was that?” they all shrugged telling you how they had no clue, you sighed and stood up walking over to Steve. “Can you tell me what's going on?” you crossed your arms, sweet Steve looking you directly into the eye as he awkwardly murmured “Uh Gareth said some things that upset Eddie so” he shrugged “What did he say?” you frowned “Uh you don't wanna know” Steve brought a hand up to rub at his stubble. Rolling your eyes you walked off in search of Eddie, who was now running through a children's pool. 

“Eddie!” you shouted sternly causing him to stop in his tracks and turn to you “Come here” you stated frustrated. Eddie turned to Gareth who also stood frozen, back to you, to Gareth and finally back to you. He sighed and trudged towards you. 

“What the hell is going on?” you crossed your arms again, watching as Gareth faking nonchalance walked off behind him. “Gareth uh was just annoying me” he brought a hand up to scratch at the back of his neck “So you chase him?” you inquired “Well yeah” Eddie turned to give Gareth an angry glare as he neared the group again. He set his gaze back onto you, your facial expression telling him that that wasn't an answer and urging him to explain “Ugh, he, he just kept saying some things, and I told him to stop and he still didn't” he set his hands onto your hips as he looked down on you. 

“What stuff?” you asked exasperated, Eddie opened his mouth “And don’t tell me I don’t want to know” you held a finger up to him, his mouth closed again, you could see his brain working to think of something to say “Just, well some things about your body” your face softened into scared hurt, Eddie understood instantly that you though Gareth had been making fun of you, your size, but he didnt know how to explain “Fuck sake, he kept saying how he was gonna” he closed his eyes annoyed “Fuck you and shit” he breathed. 

The snort that left your throat caused him to open them again “Baby, just because he says that doesn't mean it's gonna happen” you placed a soft hand on his cheek. Immediately his mind brought up Greg, stupid fucking Greg who had him doubting himself. -doesn’t mean it's gonna happen, doesn’t mean it's gonna happen, doesn’t mean it's gonna happen. He softened against your touch, nothing was going to happen, not with Greg, not with Gareth, not with anybody. “I know” he sighed, more of an admittance to himself  “I just don't like him talking to you about that” he continued as he stepped closer to you, leaning further into your touch “Yeah well he's a pig, but it's just harmless stupid jokes baby” you leant up on your toes to give him a kiss. 

“I’m only for you remember” you held your hand up to him, wiggling your fingers up to show off your engagement ring and wedding band.

Eddie hummed, why was he ever worried? You were his, you were married to him, had his babies, you’d been with him since you were 16 and him 17 for god's sake. Maybe it was the time spent together that had him worrying you had gotten bored of him, but no, it was the time together that only made the two of you stronger. You’d always been attached at the hip, stuck to each other like glue since his first senior year. Yeah you had your rough patches but you always found your way back to each other in the end.

Taking your hand and placing a kiss to the back of it before kissing your lips. “Now come on, you can buy me a gelato cuz it's too damn hot out here” you grinned as you took his hand. “Mm know something that's hotter” he snapped the elastic at your hip against your skin as he captured your lips in a kiss again.

Rejoining the group you stood with Eddie behind you, whose hands wrapped around your waist as his chin dropped to your shoulder. “Gareth, you're disgusting” you sneered “Anybody want ice cream?” you grinned to the rest, Eddie snorted behind you as the rest laughed. Soon enough you were back in your lounge chair leaning onto Eddie's chest as you sat between his thighs, happily eating your gelato while talking to Tracy, Ariana and Max. 

You had so much fun going on slides with Eddie and the kids, throwing Roxette around in the water, your two girls fighting to get the other off each parents shoulders, slurping on ice cream, chatting with everyone and it wasn't as hard as you'd all though getting each kid into their respective car and away from the fun, all exhausted from the day and ready to go home.  Dinner had been munching on whatever snacks there were around the house as kids were put to bed by nightfall.

“Damn forgot to brush my teeth” Eddie sighed as he walked into the bedroom with a towel low on his hips, tattoos on display under the same gold light Eddie had seen you in. “Ok well I’m dying for a shower so you're gonna have to do that while I’m in there” you told him as you brushed past him in a throw over beach dress, bathing suit still on. You didn't see Eddie grin behind your back as you clutched your toiletry bag on your way down the hall, quickly snapping up his things before following you.

“Oh I don't mind” he breathed as he caught up to you, you turned, rolling your eyes at him playfully as you pushed open the door, locking it after letting Eddie through, “Think I can join you?” he grinned down at you as the hand not clutching his toothbrush and toothpaste came to rest on your hip “Pretty sure you just showered baby” you smiled as you pulled away from him, pulling your dress over your head as Eddie flung his things into the sink. “Mm can’t be too clean sweetheart” he smirked as he crowded you from behind. “I’ll let you join me if you just think about this first” you turned around “You really wanna have sex for the first time in a shower in a home that's not even ours?” you began pulling the straps of your bathing suit down. 

Eddie looked off into the distance thinking it over “No you're right” he sighed “Wait wait wait, you're saying we're gonna have sex?” His eyes found you eagerly as you stripped of your bathing suit and stepped into the shower, looking back with a cheeky smirk. Eddie groaned and fell back against the sink as you turned the water off. Fuck… YES! It was happening! It was really fucking happening! 

You pulled the shower curtain closed, putting you out of view as Eddie turned and began brushing his teeth. He sat down on the toilet lid waiting for you to finish and it felt like the time droned on forever, even though it was just 10 minutes. His head perked up excitedly as you stepped out, reaching for your folded towel on the counter and wrapping yourself up in it. “Ugh fuck you’re so sexy” Eddie breathed against your ear as he wrapped around you from behind, you giggled as you picked up your stuff and unlocked the door. Walking slowly down the hall Eddie pressed his painfully hard cock against you, the evidence of the daydreaming he had been doing while you were in the shower. 

“Can't wait to get my hands on you” he whispered as you made your way down the hall. Eddie wasted absolutely no time as you got to your room, pulling the towel off you and letting it drop to the floor. Eyes roaming the various ink splatters littered over your body, shining oh so beautifully in the dim light of the room, soaking in every inch of your undeniably perfect body. “Funny I’m usually the loud one but I have a sneaking suspicion you might beat me to it this time” you grinned as you let his towel fall to the floor. “Oh do you now?” his hands went down to grab a handful of your ass “Mhm you're gonna have to be quiet” you whispered as he captured your lips in a kiss.

Blindly he led you backwards till the backs of your knees hit the mattress, falling onto it, instinctively spreading your legs to make room for Eddie. “Fuck” he made an audible groan as his hard cock came in contact with you slick wet folds, pressing into you. “Ugh fuck I’m not gonna last long baby” he breathed as he broke apart from you “Would be surprised if you did” you panted as Eddies lips began kissing down your jaw and throat, lingering on occasion to suck harsh bruises into your skin, more than on occasion, he seemed to be doing it with every kiss.

You let out a breathless moan as his lips wrapped around your pebbled nipple, sucking lightly as his hand came up to give similar attention to the other. Two metal balls cold on his muscle as he licked at your pierced nips. He didn’t hover there long though, he continued his descent kissing down your body till he slid to his knees on the floor, hands wrapping strong around your hips to pull you to the edge as he kissed your things. 

“Ughhhh fuck I’ve missed this” he groaned as he spread your folds “Missed sex or missed staring at my pussy?” You grinned down at him as you sat up on your elbows, he looked up at you mischievously “Both” and without warning he dove in, licking a broad strip from your hole up to your clit. Your head fell back as a moan ripped through you, you know Eddie had taken to pleasuring himself but above not doing anything with Eddie you weren’t doing anything alone, the feeling of Eddie's warm tongue rolling through you a second time was almost overwhelming. 

A third long lick before he focused on your clit, shorter even licks right in the nub had you gripping the sheets. His lips wrapped around you, sucking hard as his tongue flicked up and down, your hand came to snake between his damp curls and tug harshly causing Eddie to groan as he went faster. 

“Shit baby, we- we gotta be quiet” you forced out a strained whisper between pants as the vice grip on Eddie's roots tightened, all Eddie did was hum in response as one of the hands snaked around the backs of your thighs holding you to him lifted. The hand that had previously been gripping onto the bed sheets for purchase whipped away to hold a tight fist against your lips, biting down hard on your knuckles as you felt a long thick finger slip easily into you. 

“Mm fuck” you whined against it as he pushed a second in, pumping in and out furiously as his tongue flicked at an angry pace. Just as you were about to open your mouth to say something a harsh knock sounded at the door. Startling both you and Eddie as he pulled his mouth off you, head dropping down to rest his head on your mound “You gotta be fucking kidding me” he gritted through his teeth. 

You took a deep sigh as you slackened your grip on his hair, other hand coming down to the sheets to half push yourself up. “Hang on baby, mommy’ll be right there” you called strained to the door as Eddie knocked his head on your mound, the hair tickling his forehead, fingers still deep inside you. “Uh it’s just me, Steve” a deep voice sounded from the other side. 

“Oh” you fell back down on the bed, “Uh yeah?” you managed to even out your voice as you spoke, “No no don’t come in!” You shouted as you saw the doorknob turn, hand held out in the direction of the door as if to stop him. You sighed as it flung back into place “Uh I was just looking for Eddie” he tried keeping his voice down as he called through the door “What do you want?” Eddie hollered as he raised his head, irritation dripping from his voice “I was just gonna talk to you about uh my car, we talked about it earlier” 

“Yeah yeah I’ll take a look at it tomorrow” he set his chin pushing down onto the sparse hair on your mound again as he looked over to the door Aalright great I was just-“ “Steve I’ll be knuckle deep in your car tomorrow right know I’m knuckle deep in something else” he called, the offended gasp you let out as you scolded him “Edward!” with a light slap to the back of his head only had him grinning up at you smug. “Haha alright dude see ya tomorrow” Steve laughed on the other side as he heard the smack “Ok BYE Steve!” Eddie almost shouted. 

You both listened intently as you heard heavy footsteps lead away from the door “Eddie rea- ooooh shit” you broke off as Eddie set his lips back onto you, pumping his fingers in and out of you equally as fast if not faster than he had before, resuming his tackle on your clit as if nothing had happened. 

With each pump he worked faster and faster until his hand was working at an angry pace to get you to the edge, your hand pulled harder at his hair as you writhed beneath him turning to sink your teeth into the comforter. You whined as you felt that familiar feeling boil in your core, only egging Eddie on as he sucked harder. 

“Fuck I’m-I’m c-close” you whined as your hips inched away from him, Eddies fingers sinking into your skin in a bruising grip and forcing you back to him “Shit shit shit!” was all the warning as a spray of warm liquid hit him in the face, causing him to reel back. Watching in awe as you drenched his neck, chest and hand into a furious squirt. 

Within seconds it slowed to a stop as well as Eddie's fingers as he watched you panting heavily in front of him. Eyes bulging he watched as the hand that had previously ripped away from his hair to grip the sheets and fall slack next to you as you sunk into the mattress panting heavily. “Holy fuck” he breathed as he himself panted, getting to his feet and looming over you, hand falling out to keep him raised off you as his other held your shoulder gently, smoothing over your skin as he went to cup your cheek, capturing your lips in a desperate kiss, pausing your panting to kiss him back. 

The skin previously dried from his shower now soaking pressing against you as he fell onto you, both hands coming up to hold you in place as he pulled you to him, head lifting from the bed to meet him. The long kiss broke apart and you fell back onto the bed, breathing slowing as you gathered yourself. 

“Scootch up baby” Eddie whispered as he pushed himself off you “Hm?” You hummed as you opened your eyes, hands pushing into the patterned throw as you pushed yourself off the foot of the bed and up to land against the pillows. Eddie crawled up the bed, hand pushing softly to part your knees and make room for him. 

Finally your daze melted away as you looked up to find Eddie on his calves, hand wrapped around his throbbing cock as he stared down at you in awe, slowly pumping himself, each stroke revealing his angry red tip dribbling a hefty amount of precum. 

You chuckled breathlessly “Don’t want me to return the favour?” Eddie shook his head furiously as he toppled over to rest on top of you “Uh uh” he breathed and without warning lined himself up with you thrusting himself into the hilt. He let out a loud groan while you gasped in surprise. “Aaahahahuuuuh fuck” he complained breathlessly as the hand on his cock slithered up to grab at your hip. 

“Shiiit feel so good baby” his breath fanned against your ear as he buried his face in your shoulder, setting a slow pace of his hips, lips attaching back to your neck. The low whine of your throat only made Eddie speed his hips up “Baby, s-s’too big” Eddie laughed as you whined “Mm been a while?” he pulls his face out of the crook of your neck to grin down at you. As you roll your eyes Eddie plants both of his hands just below your armpits, leaning down to kiss you as he places one hard thrust into your hips, the head of his cock hitting that spot inside you he liked to call the danger zone for some stupid reason, actually the reason being that it either caused you incredibly pleasure, or incredible pain depending on what position you were in. This particular position was the former, and it showed as you moaned loudly against him. 

Braking off the kiss he moved a hand to plaster over your mouth as he thrusted another hard thrust, somehow managing to hit even deeper inside you, his head nuzzling back into the crook of your neck to leave bruises all along the expanse of your throat. Muffling the second loud moan as your eyes rolled to the back of your skull, mouth dropping in pure pleasure. Eddie hummed in agreement as he thrusted again “Mhm yeah thats the spot, fuck” he was now setting a slow pace of hard thrusts, each time inching deeper inside you as your hands pulled angrily at the roots of his locks. 

Your left hand moved from the grip near his neck to circle around his arm, fingers pressing harshly into the skin of his shoulder, nails digging in to leave small crescent moons into the inked slightly tanned skin. The same tattoo which had Eddie moaning in something other than pleasure as he first lay down on his back after a five hour appointment, complaining that he had to lay on his stomach till it healed. 

Now as you touched the ink Eddie only groaned as your nails scratched at his shoulder blades, hard thrust transitioning to quick smacks of his hips against yours, skin slapping against skin. That would have been the only sound apart from moans that would have been heard if it weren't for “Eddie the bed” you panted as the old wood and springs began squeaking with each of Eddie's movements. “You know how many beds I had to listen to rattling last night?” he pulled away from his attack on your reddening neck to stare down at you, panting between each word “Yeah it's our turn” he dove back in to suck hard at your collarbone. 

His hips were now at a furious pace, how he hadn't cum already he had absolutely no clue but somehow he had managed to hold off. That was until he felt your walls squeeze tightly around him, the burning in his belly he’d been ignoring became reality all too quickly. Hips working faster as he pulled off your collar to look back at you, hand still collapsed over your mouth, neck craned back into the pillow to match your eyes practically looking at the back wall. “Fuck ba- shit” he broke off in a groan as you squeezed harder around him “S-Sweetheart, n-not gonna last loOoong!” he tried to whisper but failed miserably as your ankles locked behind him pressing him further into you. 

Bed squeaking, skin slapping, throats groaning and moaning in blinding pleasure echoed all around the room as Eddie's movement stopped, bottoming out inside you in a loud groan as hot spurts of cum painted your walls. 

For minutes both of you just lay panting, a jumble of limbs as both of you tried to catch your breath. It was nice, lying tangled up with Eddie, naked and sweaty, totally counteracting your shower but it was nice, until it got too hot. You pushed Eddie off you, a reluctant grunt sounding from the back of his throat as he pulled out “Where you going?” he whispered as he felt a dip in the bed next to him while he lay eyes closed on his back. “Gonna open a window it's boiling in here” you stepped cautiously over the floorboards as you opened the old window, sighing as cool night air hit your skin. You looked back to see Eddie fucked out and spent with his eyes still closed on the bed and awkwardly picked up one of the towels discarded on the floor and whipped yourself off. 

Eddie peeked his eyes open as he saw you walk over to the duffle bags, dropping both towels on the bench “You-you getting dressed?” there was a hint of nervousness to his voice as he sat up, as if the prospect of you putting clothes on was like you closing yourself off again. “Relax I’m just putting on some underwear” you chuckled as you fished out a pair of forest green brazilians and pulled them over your legs. 

Eddie fell back against the bed again, laughing as he felt a pair of clean boxers hit his face. Pulling them on he hopped back onto the bed with a wide grin, beaming at you like a child receiving a bag of candy or their favourite toy. “What's got you so happy?” you chuckle as you nestle up to him, pushing his hands away as he was about to wrap them around you, turning to lay on your side and rest your head on his chest instead of his face buried  in your shoulder. 

“Oh you know my stock shares went up” his joke earned a laugh as he held your waist and trailed his fingers up and down your arm. The giggle you let out had his smile cracking wider and his arms holding you to him tighter. “Yup I stiiill got it” he smirked as you slapped his chest lightly. 

For once it seemed neither of you were woken by any distractions, Eddie roused slowly face mushed against your hair as he pulled back to see that during the night the both of you must have moved and he was now back to spooning you just like every other night. As the numb feeling of sleep tingled away he squeezed his fingers to find his hand cupping your breast. He chuckled as he heard the low whine from your throat, the sound jogging his memory. 

Oh fuck, hed gotten to touch you, fuck you, even made you squirt! That wasn't even something normal when you were having sex on a regular basis. Memories of being inside you, a tangle of legs, you pulling at his hair, sucking at your neck, all swam to the forefront of his mind. Leaning over he found himself stunned by the amount of deep purple and brown hickies that littered your skin, he couldn't even count them on his fingers Jesus Christ. Dark marks going all the way from just below your jaw all the way down to an inch or so away from your nipples, when did he even have time to do all that?

He was torn from his thoughts as you stirred, turning in his grasp to lay on your back, eyes slowly opening to see Eddie hovering above you, dopey grin painting his face. Your hands went up to the hem of the comforter when you frowned, lifting it up you peeked at what was hidden, frown dissipating to realisation as you whispered an “Oh right” which had Eddie snorting and dropping his forehead on to yours. 

“Mm morning handsome” you hummed as his lips pulled away from a deep passionate kiss “Morning beautiful” he croaked, head pulling back in shock “Beautiful” he croaked again, voice strained, he cleared his throat “Beautiful, there we go” he laughed as you giggled, those sweet noises once again having his heart doing flips in his chest. 

“So beach day again or you wanna do something else? Dustin mentioned a hike” Eddie rolled off you to lie on his back as you propped yourself up on an elbow next to you “Hmm well I am torn, can either watch you hopp around in that sad little excuse for a bathing suit you wore yesterday or stare at you ass in those bike shorts, it really is a tough decision” he grinned down at you, snorting you told him “Well my regular bikini is all dry now so don't worry you don't have to watch me hopp around in that other one” Eddie shrugged “Probably for the best, not easy hiding a boner in swim trunks, trust me” he widened his eyes. 

Ophelia and Roxette strolled in not much later to find Eddie getting dressed as you had wandered off to the bathroom. 

“Why are you wearing a hoodie? It's like 90° outside” Lucas threw his hands out as he plopped down next to you on the couch, everyone eating an assortment of fruit, cereal and toast. Eddie snorted from the other side of the table which had both of you turning towards him, Lucas with a confused frown and you with a warning glare “I’m just cold” you explained weakly “How on earth are you cold?” Mike sat down on the arm of the chair El was occupying. “Uh I just am?” “Oh come on, just take it off” Mike shrugged. 

“I-I’d rather not” you tried taking a bite of your toast to signal the end of the conversation, “Yeah she's gotta hide those massive hickies” Gareth sauntered over to hang of the back of Eddie's armchair taking an animalistic bit of a baconstrip “Not doing a good job by the way” you pulled the hood up further around your neck as the people around the living room area all turned to you. “Whats a hickey?” Jonathan's son Charlie piped up “Oh it's like a-” “Gareth” you turned to him to glare at him too who held his hands up in defeat “It's just a bruise sweetie, like when you fall and hurt yourself” Charlotte waddled over to pat her son on the head, everyone on the couch scooching up to make room for the pregnant lady. 

“Eh no one cares babes just take your hoodie off, you must be boiling” Charlotte smiled happily as she waved you off next to you, sighing you set your plate down and pulled the hoodie over your head, “Jesus christ!” the room erupted in laughter as near 20 hickeys in a steady flow down to the hem of your tanktop was revealed. You forced a straight tight lipped smile and gestured your hands out. Gareth slapped Eddie on his shoulder as he laughed “Didn’t know you had it in ya big guy” chuckling he stood up straight behind him “Mm thanks” Eddie grumbled as he finished the rest of his cereal. 

“Seriously what did you guys do yesterday?” Mike laughed, “Didn't you hear them?” Gareth imitated a high pitched version of a bed squeaking as you curled in on yourself. Roxette hurried over and climbed into you lap as she laughed “What is uncle Gareth doing?” the supposed uncle in question was in the midst of thrusting his hips back and forth, thankfully not making any lude imitations of moans “He's just being silly” you explained as you wrapped your arms around her. “Oh god” you sighed amused as Charlie and Lucas's son Billy copied Gareth's movements “Would you please refrain from teaching my kid that stuff? He’s four” Charlotte complained as she grabbed her son by the arm and yanked him to her “Yeah dude stop, no one wants to see that shit” Lucas chimed in. 

Soon enough almost everyone was outside gathered by the beach, save from Charlotte who went inside to rest, Jonathan following her and trusting Dustin to keep an eye on his kids. Blankets and towels were spread out in the sand and grass as the same group from the first day lounged on the chairs now back in their place from bonfire night. Kids splashed in the water as well as adults, some lying tanning in the sun or forcing sunscreen onto stroppy children. 

Roxette and Ophelia ran up jumping excitedly as you pulled your shorts down to tan, begging you to come jump off the jetty with them. After some faux complaining and getting a rise out of Roxy you agreed, laughing as they ran off in front of you. Walking past Eddie caught his attention immediately, the rim of the beer bottle he was holding falling away from his lips as it seemed that the world stopped around him and watching you move in slow motion. Teeth showing in a happy laugh, fingers wrapped around the hem on each side of your bikini bottoms, securing them to your hips, thick thighs rubbing against each other with each step, tits in a soft bounce from your movements. Faded ink tattoos mixed with fresher ones glittering in the sunlight as it sat high up in the sky. The quick one second of a flash of a smile towards him was the equivalent of an hour as you turned and continued walking. 

The laughter and chatter died around him as if he was submerged under water simply listening to the sounds of the ocean. In the back of his mind he thought he may have cooled down with his rapid heart beat and tensing in his thighs whenever he was around you in anything close to the line of modesty after you’d finally had sex, but no. If anything his heart was beating even faster than it had before in his life, not even the muffling of his chest could hide the beats from sounding out around him, much less hide the feeling of his swim shorts tightening around him. 

Sitting up straight from his wide legged slackened position he stared in awe at the plush thickness of your thighs, to your concealed mound up to the soft rolls of your tummy, slight jiggle of the fat around your arms and bounce of your tits, and Oh. My. God. As he zoned in on the particular area which consumed his mind most of the time he saw those faint outlines of hearts, pressing against the lavender fabric, had it not been for the sun beating down on you he most definitely would have seen the shape of your hardened nipples framed so perfectly by those little diamond encrusted silver hearts. 

Since this morning you had switched your nipple piercings, at some point, without his knowledge, and he knew you knew those little hearts were his absolute favourite of all the body modifications you had. She’s put those on for me. The hearts disappeared out of his view as you veered off to the small wooden dock, the globes of your ass swaying from side to side with every step you took, following your girls down as they desperately jumped up and down in waiting for you. 

Just as quick as the moment came, it was gone, as he watched you disappear under the surface of the water, cannonballing in with a large splash, Roxette eagerly on your tail, copying you and cannonballing in only a few inches away from your face. You laughed as you splashed her back, clapping as Ophelia too resurfaced. 

“Yo you listening to me?” Gareth slapped Eddie's arm in an attempt to regain his attention, not having noticed you walking by, he turned away from the small dots of your heads floating in the distance. “Hm? Oh right Zander yeah what about him?” Gareth repeated his comment about how their boss at the auto shop had slipped up with a recent purchase that was vital in the repair of a snazzy Rolls Royce he had been working on. 

Eddie's attention drifted way off from the conversation again as he saw you swim up to the ladder and pull yourself up. Water dripping off your body as you shoved your hair out of your face. Time slowed again as you dipped your fingers into the hem of your bottoms, pulling at the fabric to lay back properly over your ass from the water forcing them up to nestle between your cheeks as you jumped into the lake. The action wasn’t graceful, in fact it was far from it, but from the edge of the beach where Eddie sat currently having an out of world experience it was the sexiest, hottest thing he had ever witnessed you doing. Even though he couldn't see it he just knew the skin of your ass would jiggle as the elastic snapped back against it. 

“Seriously dude!” This time Gareth shoved him, almost spilling the beer in the bottle over his lap, most definitely making the little situation with the raging boner straining against the mesh a lot worse had it gone further than sloshing around the neck.

Somehow he managed to regain focus and partake in a conversation which mostly consisted of slagging his boss off, coupled with a few swares which had several moms turning their heads in a glare. And somehow he managed to calm down and let his mind focus on other things as his cock slowly softened beneath the black and blue fabric. 

“So Edward Munson” Steve grinned as he walked over the sand and slapped his friend on the shoulder “Don't let Nancy hear your wife calling you that, she'll start walking around calling me Stephen” he grimaced as Eddie turned from Gareth chuckling at his comment. “Seems something you did was successful” he walked over and sank down into the chair Gareth previously occupied, walking off to answer Jeff calling him over. 

“Seems so” Eddie raised his bottle in a mock cheer as Steve uncapped his own “Seriously dude you gotta tell me how the fuck you manage to hold out that long” he leaned in, deepening his voice so no one could overhear. “What hold out for six months? a hellofalot of polaroids and dirty magazines and taking alleged showers” Eddie’s smirk matched Steves as he chuckled, Steve let out a loud obnoxious snort “No, bro, you're like 40 years old-” “41” Eddie grimaced as he cut him off “Right well 41, I’ve never in my life heard a bed make so much noise, you were going at it for like 30 minutes with constant eek eek eek” it was Eddies turn to snort now as Steve copied Gareth's form of imitating the bed squeaking.

“Do 50 hour weeks at an auto repair shop and maybe you'll catch up to me” Steve laughed as he spread his legs and sunk further into the wood. Ophelia ran up dripping cold water all over him as she hung off the armrest of his chair “What's up rugrat?” Eddie ruffled her already tousled and drenched hair “Dad wanna come play princess with me, Mercy, Louise and Emma? Roxette doesn't want to, says it's for girls. Even though she is one which I don't understand” Ophelia mumbled the last sentence as a low rumble left Eddies chest in the form of a deep chuckle “Not right now sweetheart, daddys talking to Steve right now but maybe later” he offered an apologetic smile towards his daughter. Even though he loved her, he wasn't quite fond of having her smear her moms makeup on his face as he wore a blanket for a dress, he was banished from wearing your dresses since he almost flashed Roxette while jumping on the couch. 

“Okeeey” Ophelia grumbled and ran off to join Steve and Jonathans daughters who were already pulling at Charlottes arms. His gaze turned from his eldest to find you stepping off the jetty and making your way through the sand towards him. It was almost uncharacteristic how quickly he switched from trying not to upset his daughter to hungrily watch you in motion. Sure he drifted off and lost focus sometimes, ok a lot, but this wasn't something normal for him, he didn't even hear as Steve barked out a laugh beside him at the change in demeanour, before he even got a chance to let his eyes drift up and down your body you were stood in front of him, lips moving as you talked but not a single word registering to him. 

He straightened his back and fought with himself as he desperately tried not to let his eyes roam your body and instead look into your eyes giving you his full attention “Huh sorry what?” Steve barked another laugh beside him, you giggled “I just said hi” you reached over behind him to grab your towel on the back of his chair, “Oh hi” Eddie breathed as your tits hovered two inches away from his nose, suddenly all the air had left the sphere around earth and he had to sputter to find his breath.

A pressing matter swam to the front of his mind and ripped him out of his trance “Where's Rocky?” he whipped his head around to look behind you and scan the beach “She’s inside, Arianas showing her the wonders of The Notorious B.I.G” you ran the towel over your head, squeezing the water out of your hair “Great first Tupac now B.I.G, you know I really had hope for her, she was listening to Mötley Crue and everything” the brown bottle raised to his lips as he took a sip of the now luke warm beer, he scrunched his face up in disgust and propped the drink into the sand. 

“Hah relax babe, she still obsessed with Mötley Crue, not that I’m very happy about it, the day she starts fangirling over them is the day I divorce you” Eddie scrunched his face up again, soft lines forming on his nose as his brows furrowed “Im kidding!” you held your hands up. With your towel in your hand and arms out by your sides Eddie was fighting for dear life to keep eye contact with you, if only he had his sunglasses on. 

“Oh yo the car” Steve cut into the admittedly mundane but to Eddie, it was a heart squeezing conversation with his wife “Oh right!” Eddie made to stand up as you moved out of the way, eagerly you took his place as the seat next to you vacated with Steve standing to join him. 

It was your turn to oggle now. 

For the first time since December, watching Eddie pull at the neck of his threadbare t-shirt was exhilarating. Unbeknownst to you you were falling into the exact same trance Eddie had been, where the world fell silent and time stopped. Your eyes widened as you saw the sun bleached fabric float over his skin, inch by inch revealing that faint happy trail and that toned v-line pointed down like an arrow towards the price you were now dying to win over. Toned abs revealed themselves slowly next to a set of sleek inked hips, twigs and vines littered with roses winding down the v-line, roses matching the ones that sat under your right breast, peeking out from under your bra. A demon head and a spider showed on his left peck, hovering above a large majestic dragon protecting its four ribbed eggs, each symbolising a different person he admired and loved deeply, a constant reminder that he never wanted to lose them. Ophelia, Roxette, Wayne and you. 

Tattoo sleeves windled from his shoulders down to his wrists, puppet masters, bats, more dragons, daggers, dice and so much more all woven perfectly together resting under the surface of the soon to be golden brown skin. Formerly pale now tanning shining under the brightness of the sky, reflection of the water sparkling at his sides.

It was your turn to not register a word as Eddie spoke “We’re just gonna go have a look at Steve’s car, I’ll be back in a bit” you felt your neck twist as you followed the collections of tattoos on chiselled muscles past you where a hand dropped his shirt onto the arm of the chair and back behind you, leaning in your chair and twisting uncomfortably to follow the wide spread wings connecting to a female form, organs on show and hands displayed to its side, a tribute to his musical hero and favourite album In Utero by Nirvana. 

You felt like a teenager caught staring at her crush as you whipped around to look back at the beach when both Steve and Eddie turned to look back at you. 

“Dude she was totally checking you out?” Steve slapped him on his chest as they tread through the grass “What? Who?” Eddie turned to see you quickly pull back in your chair “Who do you think idiot?”.

Part 2!

[kitkat-the-muffin]

Something I’m insane about is the parallels between Roxy Lalonde and Jake English when it comes to romance

Roxy Lalonde is panromantic and crushing on all her friends, but none of them love her back in the same way. Jane is heterosexual, Dirk is homosexual, and Jake is very aromantic-coded and I need to talk about that but gimmie a second. Roxy is a hopeless romantic and she cares so much about those around her, but she can’t pursue any romantic interests with any of them because they either aren’t into girls or are super into Jake, and she’s fine with that because love isn’t exclusive to one type! But it hurts when it’s something you crave and you only have like four friends (including Callie) and live alone in the apocalypse!

And then there’s Jake, whom everyone has feelings for. Jane and Dirk both have intense crushes on Jake and Roxy feels obligated to give up her own to let her friends have a chance, which hurts her inside. But Jake is so incredibly unaware and unaccustomed to romance that he’s constantly asking others what he should do! He asks Jane if he should be with Dirk when he finds out about his crush and Jane, who’s so afraid of her own feelings and of confrontation, encourages him to date him! And Jake takes it as instruction, and when things start going wrong all Jake wants is some attention and quality time together with Dirk. And when Dirk avoids him for unknown reasons, Jake contacts Jane and then she yells at him for being clueless!

Jake isn’t clueless because he’s stupid, but because the romantic drive for romantic relationships is beyond him. He’s the opposite of Roxy, and he just wants to be whatever his friends want him to be because he’s a people-pleaser. Meanwhile Roxy is afraid of losing her friends, unaware that they’d love her unconditionally. But they seem to all have conditions for Jake centered around his interest, and it’s tearing him apart

AND I’M INSANE ABOUT THIS

[doomsdaydicecascader]

my problem with postcanon jade was that it said she was a cis girl before fusing with bec. i took it as the same "true in a transmisogynist way" troll as transmasc roxy

like, truly, i miss transfeminine roxy every day, and my house is fairly glass when it comes to things here considering i'm writing The Butch Lesbian Jane Comic, but like. the way homestuck fans exert ownership over the text of homestuck is fundamentally what the homestuck epilogues and post-canon are about. act 7 is about the dead calliope saying "fuck canon" and making her own, and she does not know how to care for the characters in question. i genuinely believe reconciling these facts, that what homestuck wants to be and what fans want homestuck to be are tangibly, ideologically opposed, is what post-canon is about

"fans read this character as X identity" is fine and good but that's paratext at best, and making demands of a text that has no obligation to respect them at worst. the epilogues are cashing in that desire to not respect them. homestuck has always been shaking off its readers who exert too much ownership, feel too comfortable with it. this goes way back as far as act 5 act 2 - the author commentary describes switching between walkaround sprites and hussnasty mode in such close proximity as a means of saying "if you always get what you expect, you will become complacent and that's no way for a reader to be", the "come in, go away" routine of homestuck is so repetitive now that i'm surprised basically nobody's caught on - homestuck is always doing insane flips to try and shake people off of it.

and now homestuck is doing that with your headcanons. like, this is a thing i see genuinely, all the fucking time in fandom over the past 15 years or so, people hype themselves up on paratexts and pretend the paratext is the source. the worst i ever saw of it was people having full blown self-harm threatening panic attacks because klance was not endgame in voltron legendary defenders. genuinely, i remember this so well - i think there were still two more seasons of the show after that event too, but i didn't watch it.

i only looked on from afar because what i saw of season 1 wasn't especially novel. castiel was never gay, no matter how many times he was caught leaking omegamusk in walmart or whatever, i'm stealing valor with this joke i was never a superwholock omegaverse girlie. there's so many fandoms i'm not a part of, it's unreal.

anyway, my point is people get really invested in their reads on characters and pretend it's real for the same reason a normie's sports team is gonna go the distance this season. and when they don't, they riot. this is literally just sports fandom 101. we may as well be talking about fucking inflategate here. i also don't go to sports. it's basically just homestuck for me these days.

i imagine this is what it's like to run my little pony before bronies came along: the show was negligible in relevance beyond its capacity to show off the new toys to play with. but the difference is that my little pony is about the toys, it's about encouraging that kind of play, it's fundamentally a set of toys they made a show about, as opposed to homestuck, which was always niche art for webcomics weirdos that caught on, quite literally, with the brony audience. i remember the first time i ever saw dave strider was on fucking ponychan, chronologically it would have been mid-act 5 act 2. it was an image of dave ransacking the lohac stock exchange, which is an a5a2 thing, it was before season 2 started, etc etc.

this is one hell of a tangent to say as far as the text of mspaintadventures is concerned, problem sleuth characters have gender signifiers that are more similar in nature to drag and performance of gender roles than any actual sexual dimorphism. homestuck characters are built atop the gender expression of problem sleuth. jade was a 13/16-year old girl, and that's the only information there was. over time, this changed.

this was an explicit change, too - it's in the change to act 6, passing through the fourth wall, that these characters, who fundamentally are game pieces, that homestuck starts to contend with the fact that people are emotionally invested in them as people. people don't like dave or vriska in the same way that people care about problem sleuth or nervous broad, and this comes out in the text. we get a lot of the best stuff in homestuck out of that change, too, like. the retcon only works because of that emotional investment, and i go so hard for the retcon. the retcon is the coolest thing ever.

and with that change, now, in 2024, she is explicitly a 39 (? i think she's 39.) year old woman with a penis. she didn't go from "cis woman" to "trans woman", she went from game piece to human person. there is no "cis jade" to be overwritten. you're assuming a "cis is default" worldview of a team of transgender and/or nonbinary people and thats just like. its not ideal, really

[imsparky2002]

Miraculous Animal AU: Theatre Class + Ondine

Ayesha the Lion - She's one lighthearted lion. Ayesha is possibly the only one who can outhappy Rose, and you can often find her gleefully roaring about something or other. Ayesha's always on the prowl, looking for ways to cheer people up. She loves cartoons and watches them with Nathaniel and Petra, even if she doesn't do a good job in drawing them. Whenever she gets down, a good pounce will often put her back into happy spirits.

Dot the Groundhog - Dot loves organizing her burrow along with other trinkets her friends find. Her and Sabrina often sniff the air for the smell of new treats. They also collaborate on maintaining track of projects by the other animals. Dot checks for her shadow every day.

Petra the Woodpecker - Petra's one passion in life is pecking. She drills tiny holes into trees to make drawings, and spends hours on each one making sure it's perfect in their eyes. Woody Woodpecker is their favorite cartoon to watch, and they prefer making art with Nathaniel and Ayesha.

Roxie the Rhino - A hot-tempered Rhino who will always debate their farm friends on any subject. Roxie loves charging, grazing and rolling around in the mud. They act as a bodyguard for their smaller friends and can always sniff out trouble. They can't stand untruths, so they usually keep their distance from Lila.

Anthony the Bat - During the day, he can be rather snarky, but at night is when he truly feels alive. He likes flying around the farm with Eri, using his echolocation to find the location of prey. He and the other gothic animals usually listen to records and brood together. He's very affectionate to his mate, Jesse, often snuggling up in his wool.

Eri the Raven - The Avian Queen of Darkness, and one dramatic raven. Eri's known for her loud caw, her theatricality and appreciation for all things macabre. For this bird, every day is Halloween, and she's always up for a scare. Her mom went viral for cawing Shakespeare and she wants to be an animal actor to follow in her footsteps. Eri loves carrying sticks in her beak and flying around with Anthony.

Candace the Gazelle - Candace is the "mom" of her farm, always making sure that everyone's behaving themselves. She's the leader of a cheer squad, with her, Staci and Margo making noises of encouragement for the other animals. Candace likes grazing and sprinting to remove excess energy.

Staci the Red Panda - The most acrobatic member of the cheerleading trio, Staci likes to swing and climb from branch to branch, munching on bamboo. Don't let the cute and cuddly appearance fool you, she's one of the snarkiest critters in the farm. She'll show her love on the inside, rather than the outside.

Margo the Polar Bear - This cheerful chilly bear is the muscle of the cheer squad, lifting up the other animals. She likes to lumber around, holding knicknacks and climbing on furniture and hunt for a nice fish. Serving as a matchmaker along with Rose, she lets out happy chuffs if she sees mates together. She also loves to cuddle with Lacey and Reshma.

Brecken the Bull - This bull's a country animal at the end of the day. His family originated from Texas, so he's got a big stature and a big heart. A sweet and earnest cow, he loves a good charging as well as nudging his friends and his nightingale mate. His moo will always brighten up your day.

Soo-Yeon the Giraffe - Soo-Yeon has heard all the tall jokes in the book due to being such a large creature. He can be clumsy, tripping over his long legs, but he's always got friends to catch his fall. Soo-Yeon has a fun game where he'll nudge a basketball with Victoria and Adrien. As the "dad" of his farm, he keeps everybody on track.

Parker the Wolf - Even if her friends aren't wolves like her, Parker sees them as members of her pack. She's all about maintaining order and rules, which means she'll often bark at any troublemakers before they cause a scene. She also has a soft side, always trying to motivate the others and keep them from harm. Parker bonds especially with Sabrina and they often howl together at the moon.

Aggie the Alligator - This short Scottish snarker loves basking in the sun and hissing at her friends. She's got gremlin energy and is relatively small for an alligator her age. Aggie loves skateboards and keeps trying to become one herself.

Mona the Sloth - She may be slow, but she isn't slow-witted. Mona is an easy going sloth who prefers it if everyone would just mellow out. She loves napping, almost as much as she loves movies. Mona will often hang on a tree, watching a flick through the window of the house next to the farm.

Evie the Nightingale - A prim and proper bird, Evie's always got a tune to belt out. She is from a long line of famous singingbirds used in circus attractions and has gone viral for her tweets and chirps. She can be a bit of a perfectionist, and stubborn, but knows when to fold 'em if her friends or mate are in trouble.

Eloise the Armadillo - Eloise is a very brainy animal, loving a good math problem, even if she's unable to write out the solution due to her tiny claws. Eloise can always be counted on as a voice of reason, when she's not too busy using her tongue to eat termites and grubs. She does need help making her way around certain areas of the farm due to her poor eyesight.

Anais the Owl - They may always be hooting and pecking, but that's because they're always looking for new scientific discoveries. It and Eloise are the best of pals, always looking to test their intellect. Her favorite thing to do is conduct experiments, even if they are simple by human standards.

Jesse the Sheep - Jesse is a bit sheepish, sort of neurotic, but one of the nicest animals around. He likes to graze quietly, so that he can have some energy when he helps manages little productions the animals put on. He's prone to bleating and having little panic attacks, but some deep breaths and a kiss from his mate Anthony will usually calm him down.

Missy the Shark - Don't let the sharp teeth fool you, Missy is a loyal yet gruff friend. She's very protective of Jesse and Ondine. Her and Kim have had a friendly rivalry since they were babies. She does like to rise from the water on occassion to give visitors a fright.

Ondine the Heron - A sweet swimmer, Ondine loves the water as much as she loves taking flight. Kim is her mate, and she loves nuzzling the monkey with her long beak. Though she can be a bit of a klutz when on land, she's working hard to always be there for her farmyard friends.

Ok, the last animal post is finally done! Lemme know what you think in the replies and reblogs and thanks to Weebs and Coco for choosing the animals! @artzychic27 @msweebyness @nerd-chocolate

[cloudwhisper23]

Her first words when she woke up were the ones that would haunt Gregory the most. Her unsteady sobbing and terrible hiccups would linger in his mind, long after the urging at the back of his mind stopped.

"Gregory? Why am I- Where are we? What happened?" Cassie's voice was broken, her confusion tangling with the lingering feeling of betrayal.

She had every right to feel betrayed. Gregory had betrayed her, just like he'd betrayed all of his friends before. The amused voice at the back of his head liked to mock him for it.

"Your use will never expire, boy." It had an odd quality to it.

If Gregory could dig deep enough, maybe he'd recognize it. But it was against the rules to examine the voice too deeply. He'd seen the result of that in what the voice had called The Reluctant One. Her expression never lost that shattered look, and Gregory was secretly glad she kept the mask on all the time now. He couldn't bear to look at her face anymore. It had been foolish to think he could escape, that they both could escape.

Gregory's own mask was off. The voice hated when he removed it, but Gregory hated wearing it. This was a compromise, he told himself, flexing his fingers within the scratchy fabric of his own rabbit suit.

"Gregory?" Cassie's voice wavered, her constant bravado completely wiped out by the reality of the situation. "What happened to you? I came here to save you and-"

Gregory turned away, feeling the calling of the voice in his mind. He wouldn't be in control in a moment, and his alter-ego, the one he'd dubbed GGY, would take over. He'd mock her for being afraid. He would be just enough like Gregory to convince her that it was all him. "I'm not the one who needed saving," Gregory whispered, lying to both of them.

"You are," GGY said, turning back to Cassie with a sinister grin.

Gregory was trapped in the backseat now as the mask went back on.

"Gregory?" Cassie's voice was very afraid now. She pulled at the cords binding her to a post, but she wouldn't be able to get away now. The fall from the elevator was more than enough for that.

"Poor little Cassie. You really thought we were friends, didn't you?" GGY shook his head, slowing creeping toward her. "You thought you could put on a brave face and save me when I was in danger. 'Cassie, save me.' I can't believe you actually fell for that."

Was this meant to be Gregory's punishment for destroying the monstrous endo? He wondered constantly when the voice would try to break him. It made his heart ache to know that he'd been too late to rescue Roxy, but at the very least, he'd ended that thing's reign of terror. The voice had gone quiet after that, if only for a few minutes. And then he heard the elevator fall and Cassie's scream.

The only other time he'd seen the shuddering shape of the animatronic endoskeleton trying to control him was when he'd equipped it with a suit that was meant to represent himself. It wasn't good enough, he knew. But he had to try to give Cassie a chance to escape sooner rather than later.

But the voice was too clever for that. There was always a backup. It muttered sometimes, about someone called William Afton. Gregory couldn't ever find any information on the man, but the voice found it amusing.

"He'll always come back," the voice croned. "You may meet him one day, if we succeed in luring him into the open."

That day hadn't come yet, but the day for punishing Gregory's past deeds had. Cassie, his only remaining friend, was about to die on her birthday. And Gregory knew he had only himself to blame.

"Why are you doing this?" Cassie whimpered, shrinking closer to the post she was bound to. "What did I ever do to you?"

"Oh, it's not what you did," GGY breathed. "It's what you are."

"What am I?" Cassie said as GGY pressed a knife to her throat.

"You're many things. If you last long enough, you're bait. If not, you're a soul to be harvested. You're a child, which makes you even more tempting." GGY pressed the knife hard enough to encourage a bead of blood to slip down Cassie's neck. "I suppose you also did save me, in a way. I was trapped for quite some time. But most importantly, you're an example."

"An example? For who?" Cassie's tears had stopped, and she was searching the grinning expression of the rabbit mask, like it would reveal a secret to her.

"To the ones who would lock me away," GGY replied. "I wonder how long you'll last." The knife moved away from her throat, hesitating by the left side of her chest for a moment before GGY leaned fully on her broken leg.

Gregory hated the sounds of her screams, and he knew no one else would be able to hear them. Whatever the voice was in life, it certainly knew how to keep a room isolated.

"Guess what I found," the glitchy voice of the white rabbit said, somewhere near Gregory's right ear. GGY let up, and Cassie shuddered, broken sobs slipping quietly from her mouth.

"What did you find?" GGY asked.

Vanny, as Gregory knew her, tossed the mangled remains of Freddy's head at his feet. Gregory recoiled, anguish tugging at him from every angle. "He tried to be a hero. What a mistake."

GGY laughed as Gregory silently wailed for his fallen friend. He'd hoped against hope that since Freddy remained unattached to his body that he'd remain somewhere safe. Evidently, he'd found a way to come after his new family. The two people he cared most deeply about.

"He's long gone by now," Vanny said, amusement lingering after GGY finally stopped laughing. Gregory felt sick, but his emotions were hardly a consideration now. "The light took forever to kill, but it's gone now. I waited to make sure."

Was it blue or yellow when it went out? Gregory wondered quietly. Freddy had manic tendencies sometimes, especially when he'd felt particularly defensive of his charge. When he had that defiant reaction, the color changed from a kind blue to a fierce yellow glow. Gregory had only seen it twice, but he liked to think the light wouldn't go out on blue.

Even thinking that, a beeping noise came from Freddy's destroyed head. Cassie instinctively lifted her head, makeup running like it had the first time Gregory had met her.

"Freddy?" she whispered faintly, hope clear in her voice.

Vanny shook her head. "Why is she still alive?"

"I was getting to it," GGY snapped. He kicked the Freddy head as he returned to his place beside Cassie. "Just because you don't care for the screams-"

"The job is to kill. Not to torture."

"Reluctant?" GGY's words were a challenge, and Vanny knew it.

"Hardly. I prefer the term efficient," Vanny sneered. "Are you going to finish it? Or are you the reluctant one?"

Gregory's heart sank, knowing how this would end. "Just because you can't enjoy a bit of suffering doesn't mean I won't. Angie shouldn't have had a quick end."

"Well, maybe Cassie should," Vanny snapped, and before GGY could try to get in a word edgewise, she yanked the knife free from his grasp and plunged it into Cassie's heart.

Cassie only had the chance to gasp softly before sagging against her bonds, completely limp.

She was gone, and Gregory knew it was his fault.

[viarayy01-blog]

Guide to Parenting - fnaf fic

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50957647

something i wrote to pass the time! - enjoy!!

-x-x-x-

Roxy leaned in closer to the book, attempting to read the words lining the page. “Wait.. say it one more time?” She turned to Freddy, extremely confused. “I'll reread it again. Ehem…” Freddy cleared his throat and scanned the book pages. “To be a good parent, you must always be monitoring your children. If they seem suspicious, then that means they are doing something inherently wrong, and 110% dangerous. If they keep secrets, or hide things from you, they are going to rebel sooner or later. We don’t want that, do we?” Freddy paused and waited for Roxy’s response. “We…don’t?” Freddy gave her an encouraging look, and continued reading, “All you have to do is remember this simple acronym. A.P.P.L.E. Assess, Prod, Punish, Last chance, and… Execute?” Roxy’s confused expression did not falter, even after a second read.

“Execute? Like kill them?” Her voice started to rise. “Are you saying we have to kill the kids?” Roxy became flustered and angry, attacking Gregory was one thing, a thing he completely deserved, but why would she ever harm Cassie?

“No…” Freddy replied quickly, sensing Roxy’s worriedness. “Perhaps it means to execute the previously stated retribution. Such as, following through with the punishment. Still.. what a strange way to put it.” He trailed off, deep in his own thoughts.

“So.. we have to always watch them, and stop them if they act suspicious in any sort of way? There’s not even any danger at the apartment, aside from that security guard.” She smiled to herself, and Freddy sighed, slightly amused.

“Officer Van-…” he paused. “I mean, Vanessa would never hurt the kids, you know that Roxane.” She scoffed.

“Whatever, just keep reading.” She said irritably and waited for Freddy to continue.

After reading for 20 or so minutes more, they closed the book and tried to figure out what to do next. “Perhaps,” Freddy began, “we should go use our knowledge and test ourselves on what we’ve learned!”

“Alright!” Roxy exclaimed. “Ill deal with Cassie obviously, and you’ll take care of..” she paused and let out a mocking sigh. “Gregory.” Freddy smiled and they went to each of the kids' respective areas in the apartment.

The apartment had 2 bedrooms, a bathroom, and a joint kitchen / living room area. Vanessa’s room was completely off limits, it was where she monitored M.X.E.S and kept an eye on all things that happened at the Pizzaplex. Her walls were a dark grey. The kids bedroom was painted blue, since before Cassie arrived, Gregory had the room all to himself. The room was covered in Gregory’s drawings, mostly of strange and twisted events occurring to Vanny and Freddy respectively. One even depicted a strange rotting corpse in a bunny suit and a huge amalgamation of wires with loose animatronic heads. On Cassie's side of the room was a huge poster of a cartoon she liked and a few Roxane drawings that Gregory had drawn for her. On each of the kids bed’s were a wide array of stuffed animals. Gregory had a Freddy and Sundrop set, while Cassie had a Roxane and Chica pair. A Monty plush sat on the single desk placed in front of Cassie's bed.

Usually, the animatronics would recharge in the living room or rest in the car, which was where they got their main energy supply. Vanessa would go out every week to get a full tank of gas so that the car had enough energy to recharge Freddy and help with some of Roxy’s repairs. Right now she was out of the house, going to pick up groceries. Freddy was in charge while she was gone, and Roxy served as his only way to get anything done, due to the fact he was only a head.

Roxy picked up Freddy and brought him to Gregory, who was typing on his computer in the bedroom. Gregory looked up from his work, somewhat startled by the sudden presence of two robots. He saw Freddy and relaxed his shoulders. He looked up further to Roxy, who growled at him before storming off. He giggled and then returned his attention to Freddy.

“What’s up, Superstar?” Freddy tried to get a better look at the laptop Gregory was typing on. Gregory tensed up once again and clicked a few times, his hands moving swiftly across his laptop.

“Everything ok, Gregory? Why do you look so nervous?” Gregory tried to keep a smile on his face.

“Nothings wrong! I'm just showing you what I'm working on!” He motioned to the screen. It had a huge line of text covering it, and at the top of the tab the document was called, ‘Practice Code’. Nothing seemed too suspicious. Freddy remembered what he had read, and prepared to dig deeper into what was really going on.

“Is this for the lessons Vanessa has been giving you, Superstar?” Gregory loosened a bit, and then nodded.

“She wants me to help her when she goes to the Plex next, I have to be able to stay in the car while she goes and assess the M.X.E.S. module. It’s a lot to learn, even if I had been really good at coding before she gave me lessons.” Freddy looked over the page again, it was a simple code line that was mainly used for a debug command. Gregory may have only been experienced in coding games and more so hacking, but he was still exceptional at learning new things. “It looks great,Superstar. I'm sure Vanessa will be proud of your work.”

Gregory smiled, tilted his head and turned the laptop back towards him. “Thanks, Freddy.” He quickly tapped a few more times on his mousepad before his face turned stone cold and he began to type. What was he really working on?

__ __ __

Roxy knocked on the bathroom door. “Come in!” said Cassie, who had her hands full of makeup brushes and pallets. “Cassie? What are you doing?” Cassie turned her head away from the door, obviously hiding something. “No! Don’t look!” The bathroom was a disaster. Different colors of eyeshadow were sprawled across the mirror and counter, chunks of lipstick and loose blush were caked in the sink, somewhat clogging the drain.

“Cassie.” Roxy said sternly “I cannot see anyway.” A silence followed.

“Oh. Right.” Cassie said, sheepishly turning around to face her. Roxy felt around the bathroom, trying to find a wall to lean up against. Her hands found a towel, which she placed on the floor for her to sit on, so her rough wires and exterior wouldn’t scratch the tiles or wall.

“What’s wrong? Explain to me what you're even doing, I can only hear so much.” Cassie sighed and sat next to Roxy.

“I was putting makeup on. Again. But…” She was quiet for a second before she, unprompted, started to cry. “It looks nothing like how I wanted.” She sniffed. Roxy, startled, tried to remember the A.P.P.L.E. acronym from earlier. Her heart swelled with confidence, she was going to make everything perfect.

“So uh… to ASSESS the situation better, why don’t you explain exactly what happened.” Wow.. Roxy thought to herself, I really am the best! If she kept up at this pace with this much ease, she wouldn’t even have to get to the end of the acronym.

Cassie wiped her face, her sleeve becoming stained with mascara and eyeshadow. “Okay… it all started when I found a picture of Vanessa in her nightstand drawer.”

__ __ __

Freddy had assessed the situation, but now he had to dig deeper. “Uh.. Gregory..” He started, trying to organize his thoughts. “I think that I should go through your laptop.” Gregory stopped typing, staring blankly into his computer.

“Huh.” Gregory slowly turned his head to meet Freddy, his face completely deadpan. “What do you mean? You just wanna look at the outside?” Sweat beads formed on Gregory’s forehead.

“No, I mean I want to go THROUGH your computer.” Nothing. Gregory did not change his facial formation. “Such as the files and documents. Is that a problem?” Freddy hadn’t seen Gregory so dogdey since he had taken Roxy’s eyes, he must be hiding something for sure.

Freddy opened a hatch under his ear, and a usb drive slowly whirred out. Freddy motioned to the laptop with his eyes, waiting for the computer to be plugged in.

“I…uh… I don’t want to.” Gregory said, voice wavering. “My laptop is for me and me only.” Freddy’s eyes widened. Backlash. Gregory had always been stubborn, but he usually obeyed what Freddy asked of him. He thought back to the next letter from the book. Punish. This was going to be difficult.

“Gregory, I don’t want to force you to do this, but I think its in your best interest if I go through everything on your laptop. It’s for your safety. I don’t want to take your laptop from you, but you can’t just outright say no. I’m in charge, remember?”

Gregory drew his eyebrows together, his stone cold gaze becoming dagger-like. “How are you gonna take it from me?” He said defensively, holding the laptop close to his chest. “You don’t even have arms to grab it with!”

Freddy gasped and let his eyes go wide. “What a rude thing to say! Superstar. This is your LAST CHANCE. Plug the computer in, or I'll call Vanessa and tell her how you’ve been behaving. This is your final warning.”

Gregory’s face dropped a little. He was so looking forward to going to the Plex with Vanessa. He wanted nothing more than to help, to fix all the hurt he caused when he was originally trapped at the mall. Instead of feeling scared or sad though, Gregory got angry.

__ __ __

Roxy couldn’t believe what she just heard. “You went in Vanessa’s room?? Why were you in there?” As much as Roxy disliked her former security guard, she understood wanting to have her own space.

After all, it was in her bedroom that Roxy was able to get all her feelings out, no matter how messy they were.

What else might have Cassie seen in her room? Disturbing files? Secrets? What if Cassie was fascinated with Vanessa now, and she didn’t like Roxy anymore? Roxy immediately spearheaded herself deeper.

“I don’t know… we were talking and she said something about…uhh…” She got a bit nervous about mentioning the Vanni mask, so she quickly found an alternative. “about … makeup! Yeah… makeup.” She managed to catch herself. “So I wanted to see what other makeup stuff I could find in there. But I didn’t find much, just this photo of Ness with a girl. They look around the same age.” She pulled out the photo. “They’re holding hands and leaning next to each other. I really liked the girl’s makeup, so I wanted to surprise Ness with a re-do of it myself. But, I'm not very good, and I made a mess in the bathroom. She’s been working hard at the Plex to make things right, I just wanted to do something nice for her.” She had stopped crying, but looked genuinely sad.

Roxy sat quietly with Cassie for a moment. Her thoughts quickly jumped around. Screw this stupid system. She doesn’t need a strict parent. She needs a good role model. She needs advice. Roxy pulled Cassie's hand away from her face, where she had continued to rub her makeup off.

“Listen Cassie. I understand that you wanted to do something nice for…Vanessa. But you know better than to go snooping around. You might have found something Vanessa didn’t want you to see. Something about her past she would rather keep away. I’m sure she would’ve loved to see your makeup anyway, but how about doing something else nice for her instead?” Cassie looked up at Roxy, with a look of thanks and relief.

“Okay. What could I do for her then? I don’t know what she likes to eat, otherwise we could make her something. Or maybe she would like a drawing!” Roxy looked deep in thought too, but suddenly a loud noise came from the bedroom.

“What was that?” Cassie asked. Roxy peered her head out the door, it seemed to be an argument. She stood up.

“Let’s go see… stay behind me okay?” Cassie nodded and helped Roxy up, pulling her up by her hand.

“Superstar! I warned you! I have to EXECUTE this procedure!” Freddy had extended the usb drive all the way to the computer, clicking it into place and locking it. Gregory tried to pull the USB out, tugging as hard as he could.

“No! You can’t see what’s on here! It’s MY laptop! Let go!!” Roxy burst through the door, slamming it against the wall, startling not only her but everyone else. The sounds of Gregory trying to pull his computer away from Freddy did not waver or stop.

“What is going on here!? You're scaring Cassie!” Cassie snuck around Roxy’s legs, diving between them and bolting into the room. She came between the two and tried to pull Gregory’s hands away from the computer.

“Gregory! What are you doing? Just let go!” She tugged his hands away, and pushed him away from the laptop. He stumbled a bit, running into his bed before tripping and falling back.

“Gregory! Are you okay?” Freddy called out, worried. Cassie placed the computer next to Freddy on the desk, and went to help Gregory.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to push you that far. You just wouldn’t let go!” Gregory shook his head and stood up.

“It’s not your fault Cassie, I got carried away.” He turned to Freddy, who while looking concerned also looked somewhat far away. He was analyzing the files.

“Freddy, its not what it looks like.” He quickly turned to Cassie, bracing for impact. His eyes grew wide and worried, and he mouthed out words to help get his point across. She in turn looked very worried.

“What happened? Someone tell me what’s going on?” Roxy was tapping the doorframe, trying to find a safe space to stand where she wouldn’t knock anything over.

Freddy had finished. He blinked a few times before removing the USB from the laptop, pulling it out with force. “Gregory..” His eyes readjusted into place, pinning his focus on Gregory. “Why didn’t you tell me about this?”

The laptop screen was covered in blueprints. There were photos of each animatronic, not just Roxy and Freddy, in each corner of the screen. Detailed instructions and directions were typed along the edges.

Cassie pulled Roxy into the room, and then returned to Gregory’s side.

“Sigh.. It was supposed to be a surprise, Freddy.” Cassie said guiltily. “We were working so hard to get it all done for you, before you caught on.” Gregory shuffled beside her.

“I wanted to find some way to thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I feel like I always get everyone into trouble, and never get them out. I was trying to figure out a way to save all the other animatronics from the PizzaPlex, so that Ness and I could repair their AI and hardware. So that they could be free from the virus.” He turned to his side.

“Cassie was helping me out, since she only got out of the Plex recently. She said she found someone, another animatronic, in a hidden room. She said she found Bonnie.”

Freddy was in shock. He felt so much relief over what he found, but so much distrust, too. Bonnie? It had been forever since he had heard someone else talk about him. Not even Roxy mentioned him anymore.

“Is this true, Cassie?” Roxy said from behind her. She looked so hopeful.

“Yeah.. we were going to get Chica first, then Sun— I mean… Eclipse, and Monty.”

“That’s why Vanessa has been at the Plex so much recently, she’s been trying to find the Mimic, and keep it away while I go in to lure everyone out. Once everyone was fixed, then Monty could go get Bonnie from behind the bowling alley. We were going to save everyone. And fix them. Fix you and Roxy too.”

“Superstar…this..” Freddy tried to find the words. “Thank you. I’m sorry for trying to invade your personal space. I should have never trusted that book. ” Gregory looked a bit surprised.

“What book?” He said, narrowing his eyebrows.

— — — —

Pulling the book up on her lap, Cassie read the cover. “A Guide to Parenting, by Fazbear Entertainment.” Her nose scrunched. “The Fazbear company wrote this?” She flipped through the pages, landing on the one Roxy and Freddy had been reading.

Gregory leaned in closer, resting his hand on Cassies shoulder. “The A.P.P.L.E. acronym, huh? Yeah, I remember seeing this before.” He flipped ahead a couple of pages, scanning the letters that lined them. “This is what they train all their employees off of, majority of them are parents or take care of kids majority of the day, so they're required to read this book. I always thought the ending of it was weirdly violent?” He leaned in closer, seeming to be looking for something. “Still, standard Fazbear Entertainment behavior.”

After flipping through a few pages more, the group landed on a section with detailed spring lock suit failure instructions, including a drawing that was painted on the pages. It was very gorey, to say the least. “Ohhh kay.” Cassie slammed the book shut, somewhat bewildered. “Enough of that.”

Gregory took the book from her, placing it on the coffee table. “Yeah, I don’t think that is the book that anyone should base their parenting off of.” Gregory said with a smile. His gaze ever so slightly shifted over to Freddy. Cassie slid off of the armchair and brushed off her shorts, turning to face the group.

“I think we should clean up before Ness gets home. There’s nothing better than coming home to a clean house.” She fiddled with the cuff of her shirt, someone complacent. “Plus…I don’t think she’ll like how much of a mess I made in the bathroom.” She giggled.

After cleaning up the bathroom and the rest of the house, Cassie and Gregory were sent to their rooms.

Even though everything had still worked out, they couldn’t get off scot-free. They each broke a rule, and for that they would be grounded for a week.

Their spirits were still high though, and when Ness got home, she went to her room to find a book on her bed. There was a loose paper sticking out, its edges just barely visible. She opened the book to the outstretching paper.

It was a drawing, done by Gregory. It was of Gregory and Cassie, holding a red heart with pink letters inside that said; “Thanks! :)” underneath, text in scratchy black pen wrote, (PS. GET RID OF THIS BOOK! NOT SAFE FOR THE KIDS!) that was obviously from Freddy, written by Roxy judging from the incomprehensible handwriting.

She pulled the drawing out of the book, when another paper fell out from behind it. It was a polaroid. She bent down to pick it up, flipping it over. The photo was of her and Lia. Before Vanny. Her hand glazed over the image, such a distant memory in her mind. She wished so badly to talk to Lia again, but there was no way Lia would want to. Dropping the oddly twisted book in her small mesh garbage can, she smiled to herself, put the drawing and photo on her desk, and went out to make dinner.

[retiredficwriter]

me? being tagged by @jetsteelyourheart ?? what an honor!

just like the top 5 favorite characters: Make a poll with 5 of your favorite rarepairs/crackships. See which one is everyone's favorite!

i became too invested in this. some of these ships i haven't thought in years, so it was nice to relive the times i was obsessed with them. i narrowed it to one ship per media/fandom and just like my tag-buddy, I'll provide my questionable reasons/propaganda.

REASONS/PROPAGANDA

Sydney Sage/Trey Juarez:

so when i was first reading bloodlines, i read online that sydney gets a human boyfriend in book 2. i had heard about brayden but never in the context of HIM being the boyfriend, so i thought he was the random dude in book 1 (wasn't he, unironically, called hayden??) who asked sydney out. i was theorizing who that boyfriend would be until my brain went: "omg.... IS IT TREY??" and got soo hyped. i loved their interaction in book 1 and thought exploring them in a romantic setting would be so interesting, especially with the implication of trey having a major role. they are so similar (growing up in a cult, daddy issues, both being smart) and yet, trey has some adrian-like traits?? charming, popular in the dating pool, laidback... and it would create some tension between sydrian??? imagine adrian watching trey and sydney date and feeling discouraged because she found a human "version" of him?? and with trey being a warrior, he would try to get sydney to have the alchemist side with them and push the "moroi are evil" narrative, creating more doubts for sydney to rebel! BUT THEN SYDNEY HELPS TREY REBEL AGAINST THE WARRIORS!!

i love their friendship as is, and know for a fact they wouldn't last that long but man... i would have eat up their failed romance.

bonus point for an adrian/sydney/trey polycule

Rachel Berry/Sam Evans:

ah yes. my first ever rarepair. since that one episode in season 2 where she and finn helped sam with his young siblings, i fell in love with them. if you were in the glee fandom, you know every single couple was problematic one way or the other (this is the writers' fault). yet somehow, every relationship sam was in, it was the healthiest the woman he was with ever had. and i wanted that for rachel! i ate all the crumbs this show gave me, which were... almost nonexistent. the big difference between this rarepair and the others on this poll is that, in the show's final season, THEY BECAME CANON. I WAS SO HAPPY. they were very unpopular because it came out of nowhere and the writers only put them together to give rachel a love interest for the final season (and give the storyline they planned for finn to someone else), which... fair. but he was so caring, encouraging her to follow her dreams and telling her the tough truth about things she didn't want to hear. it was so good to see rachel heal from finn and her failed broadway dreams while with sam. (also she was less insufferable with him).

but then, ha... they broke up on the third to last episode of the series. so she could be with jesse who showed up out of nowhere on that same episode, after he "left" 4-3 seasons ago. don't get me wrong - i love st. berry! jonathan groff and lea michelle have chemistry! love ambitious broadway wannabes being a power couple! but why not, i don't know, put the storyline she had with sam with jesse instead so it could be more organic and avoid crushing my dreams???

i'm fine. not bitter at all. I'M FINE. I'M F-

Clarisse La Rue/Silena Beauregard (PJO):

this isn't a rarepair compared to the previous two, but within the pjo fandom, it isn't as popular (surprisingly?? at least in ao3. i'm so out of the loop). first time reading pjo, little old only thought of clarisse and silena as best friends. but as i got older and read more fan analysis of the series, i realized the tragedy of these two. either 1) clarisse had an unrequited crush 2) they dated and didn't work out 3) it was a failed situationship. the daughter of ares, the girl people in camp-half blood are so scared of because she is mean to everyone and can (and will) beat the shit out of them, had a wholesome friendship with the daughter of aphrodite, and one of the nicest people in the camp?? and this friendship appeared because silena helped clarisse with her "boy problems"??? and then clarisse basically protected and comforted silena after what happened with charlie?? no spoilers for those who haven't read the books, but they parallel a famous greek mythology couple and their ending hurts. still love silena/charlie, but god... poor clarisse...

can't wait to keep rereading the books and suffer once i get to their part!

Gary "Eggsy" Unwin/Roxy Morton (Kingsman)

everyone prefers hartwin and merlin/eggsy, but i can't help but love mortwin. i watched the first movie and loved their small moments. loved how they bonded over being the underdogs in the competition and, instead of becoming sworn enemies, they recognized each other as worthy opponents. their small fun, friendly-rivarly banter was cute. part of me was relieved they stayed as friends in the end... but i couldn't help but be soo disappointed. the chemistry? it was there!! even taron egerton said there was potential to explore a romance if given the chance! plus, i'm a sucker for well-developed friends-to-lovers.

never watched the sequel but after reading what the writers did to roxy, i'm glad i didn't and never will. i can now create my own sequel in my head and read fanfics of the story they deserve 😌

Bella Swan/Leah Clearwater (Twilight):

i want to thank this one brazilian fanfic i found years ago (and never wrote down the name and lost it 😔) for presenting me with this ship. everyone talks about bella/alice, bella/rosalie, bella/carlisle... but what about bella/leah??? think new moon, when bella has just been abandoned by edward, meeting the werewolves through jacob and therefore leah, who is still dealing with the whole paul/emily thing. they can still start out with leah hating bella but they can bond over being abandoned by their boyfriends and heal from it, and in the end realize they don't need them anymore - they can have each other!

i also love if edward still comes back and bella is conflicted, and it's a edward/bella/leah love triangle (apparently people ship edward/leah and how i never heard of it?! imagine the drama!!) i will take anything where jacob isn't involved

tagging @morocorra @forcebookish @artianaiolanthe @sydneysageivashkov + anyone who wants to do this!

[artknifeandglue]

in pursuit of you (the sound of time tick-tocking away): DVD extras

Did you read in pursuit of you (the sound of time tick-tocking away) on AO3? Did you enjoy it? Did you wonder about some things that were mentioned, or did a passing comment alluding to history/mythology/etc make you laugh?

Here are all the bits of lore/worldbuilding/character backstory that didn't make it into the fic!

The Immortal Cast, in General

Immortals like Eggsy and Roxy never age and can't die of natural causes (sickness, old age, etc), but they can be killed. As of the time of the story, there are ten existing immortals. One surfaces every century or so for reasons no one can explain, though they both Merlin and Morgana suspect it has something to do with a human being born in the right place (concentration of magical power) at the right time (alignment of the stars, etc).

Despite having potentially magical origins, most immortals aren't capable of magic, and the few in history that could wield magic were never on the same power level as Merlin and Morgana. They also died pretty fast for various reasons. This means that while Merlin and Morgana are technically immortals too, the other immortals consider them to be higher beings and have a healthy respect for them (and also quite a bit of fear, especially of Morgana).

Most of the immortals opt to keep a low profile and either live modestly or stay out of sight and influence things from a distance. Once word gets out that they're immortal, people tend to try and kill them; doubly so for anyone rich/powerful/highly visible, because humans throughout history regularly try and kill those people anyway.

Charlie is the only exception to the above rule, but that's because he promised Morgana his loyalty in exchange for wealth and power and her protection. This happened some time in the eighth century.

Roxy's involvement with the House of Habsburg began shortly before the reign of Maximilian I.

Merlin takes care of the immortals (except Charlie, he's Morgana's property and Merlin can't+won't touch anything of hers), but he has two favourites: Roxy, because she's the most capable of the lot, and Eggsy, whose mission and dedication Merlin respects even if it means he has to go get Eggsy out of trouble every now and then. Also, both of them bring him gifts when they visit.

That time Merlin had to bail Eggsy out of prison? It was 1789, and Eggsy was in the Bastille. Merlin's assistance in getting Eggsy out of prison and out of France are how Eggsy narrowly avoided the French Revolution and everything that followed after.

Merlin and Morgana

Yes, they've been rivals forever. An important note: Morgana isn't evil in the conventional sense of the word, she just isn't particularly attached to humanity and is very willing to trade human lives for her own gain. Merlin generally wants to help and protect the humans, but as the humans got more adept at killing each other in large numbers, he's had to become more practical about the whole thing and make trade-offs to maximise the preservation of greater numbers of lives.

Morgana's reputation as a dark witch comes about because of her willingness to tap into dark magic and her familiarity with it, but it's more a question of specialisation and frequency than one of absolutes. Merlin can and will use dark magic if the need arises, but he will hesitate if there's some sort of human cost to it; Morgana has no qualms using it if it'll benefit her, which is pretty often.

They both had pet cities in which they encouraged the humans to develop! There were a lot of them, but London was one of Merlin's and Edo was Morgana's. For the longest time, they were both territorial over those cities - stepping into the other's city or interfering with it would start a fight. Most of those clashes started with one of two things: Merlin trying to stop Morgana from doing something to the human population somewhere by wading into/sending his minions into her cities, or Morgana trying to provoke Merlin by doing the same things to his cities and causing problems.

Merlin started the Great Fire of Meireki in Edo unintentionally while defending himself from a very angry Morgana, whose cursed kimono featured in this story is taken from the legend of the actual fire. He did succeed in destroying it, but the resulting fire burnt down two-thirds of the city. Morgana very intentionally started the Great Fire of London in retaliation.

Merlin and Morgana do eventually reach a ceasefire agreement in which they no longer jealously guard their cities from each other (open borders! No more territories!), and Morgana agrees not to interfere in global politics in exchange for Merlin leaving her and her cursed artifacts alone. He still keeps track of them and what they're doing, but they result in minor casualties and small-scale losses at best, so he lets them go in exchange for the greater good of not levelling huge cities with hundreds of thousands of people in them.

What brings this wonderful ceasefire about? World Wars I and II.

What were Merlin and Morgana doing in World Wars I and II?

Both World Wars are entirely human-driven - neither Merlin nor Morgana were part of its beginnings, though Merlin does initially suspect Morgana's involvement in the assassination and the July Crisis. He discovers otherwise when he storms up to her lair to pick a fight.

The Great War, as it was known at the time, had such a high casualty count and was horrific enough that Morgana was unnerved by it. She didn't interfere in the war (Merlin was desperately trying to end the conflict the whole time), but watching from the sidelines did influence her decisions down the line.

Kingsman exists in part because Merlin helped found it! It retains its canon origins of a bunch of rich men losing their sons and committing to protecting the world, but Merlin's involvement stems from the fact that wars are getting too big for him to end directly and having an intelligence agency like Kingsman allows him to at least do something about the way the humans fight their wars (or stop them from being fought so fewer people die). It's the humans' idea and they're the ones to get it working, but he helps pave the way for them a little bit and then gets himself in the door.

Merlin did not pick the Arthurian mythology theme for all the Kingsman agents' codenames. The humans did, and he just quietly suffered without actually objecting because you know what, it's fine, it's their project after all.

World War II breaks out, and this time Morgana hears of the millions of people dying (even more than The Great War) and decides that a massive drop-off in the human population is Extremely Bad For Business. She reaches out to Merlin around 1942, but even with their combined efforts, the war doesn't end until 1945.

What was Eggsy doing in World Wars I and II?

World War I: His soulmate who died in 1911 still hadn't been found by the time the war broke out. On Merlin's orders, he (and all the other immortals) hunkered down and went into hiding for the four years it took the war to blow over. Eggsy then found his soulmate in 1930, aged 19.

World War II: Eggsy's soulmate gets conscripted and deployed to the North African campaign, making Eggsy the only immortal to dive into an active warzone. Merlin is Not Pleased about having to run additional interference (on top of trying to end the war!) to make sure Eggsy and his darling both don't get shot, blown up, or killed. (He does so anyway because he has a lil soft spot for Eggsy, his favourite little troublemaker.)

Knights of the Ground Table: The current day

Eggsy's apartment in Kennington is a short walk from The Black Prince.

Merlin tinkers with technology every now and then, but it doesn't always go well - he's found that magic tends to short out larger electrical appliances or make them not function very well. It works fine in smaller devices like smartphones and tablets.

Harry is actually a trained tailor, but more for the purposes of cover and plausible deniability than for any actual work.

Harry does make the first move because 1) he's not exactly a shrinking violet in canon, and so he isn't here either 2) man is a spy! He does pick up on Eggsy being hopelessly in love with him, so there's reciprocated interest.

Merlin has a similar attitude towards Harry Hart as he does towards Eggsy, which is that he does like them but will endlessly complain about them. Also, he cannot believe that the most irritating immortal he knows and the most irritating mortal he knows are somehow an item.

Harry gets on Merlin's nerves on purpose. Always has, always will, and continues to do so even after he learns of Merlin's magical might. This man is a spy and has fully accepted death as an occupational hazard, and really, what's Merlin going to do? Kill him?

By a combination of insanely good luck and skill, Harry lives to the age of ninety-four. :)

Thanks for reading!

[itzme-thefaust]

Hey uh, your IEYTD swap stuff is really cool! If you want to share more about it I'd love to hear!

since u asked so nicely … :3

[•Atlas Phoenix]

[He/They]

•Used to be a highly skilled Field Agent, codenamed Agent Matchstick for their bright personality and highly reactive nature.

•Forced to retire after lung damage, semi-verbal due to damage as well. Placed in handler job to encourage new agents to pick up their old tricks.

•Transmasc, supported Jade in her gender exploration.

•Avid smoker and alcoholic. Only recently making attempts to quit.

[•Icarus Mason]

[Any pronouns]

•Codenamed Agent Crane, for ability to complete missions “unscathed” and “with unmatched grace”. Only Atlas knows just how chaotic the missions really get.

•Rambles when nervous. A lot.

•Hydrophobic, which has only worsened over the course of his time working for the Agency.

•Legs damaged after almost dying at end of IEYTD 2. Cannot walk for long, has a wheelchair.

[•Dr. Jade]

[She/they]

•Turns gems into jewellery as a hobby when not inventing.

•Necklace is kinesium! Had made a matching one for Atlas, which exploded during a mission. Led her to studying kinesium and its properties afterward.

•Transfem, has only been out for a short time. Faced harsh transphobia after ditching the Agency.

•Names all of their robots, even while treating them harshly during a time of her self-destructive spiral. Robot positioned to work in their house is named Gibson.

[• Roxy Rhinestone]

[She/her]

•Does her best to maintain a demeanour of politeness when not performing. In a way, she’s always performing as a result.

•Refers to her underlings by their job titles first and their names second. Insists on doing so (eg. “Butler Roland”)

•Has only expressed intense amounts of bubbling rage she’s collected over the years once, to Crane during Operation: Safe and Sound. Crane has never forgotten it.

•Closeted lesbian. Keeps relationship secret.

[also these havent been fleshed out yet but solaris is swapped with ollie, hive mind is swapped with charlie caliente, and zor is swapped with morales. solaris craves to reach the stars, but is stuck under the ocean. charlie looks after fire ants. zor is the most evil-seeming non-evil individual alive]

thank u for the ask !!! itz appreciated a lot , and faust hopes to flesh out this au more :3

[yanderes-galore]

Fandom: Hiveswap/Homestuck

Character: Stelsa Sezyat

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic Pale Relationship

Type of fic: Holiday themed oneshot?? :33

Sure! I'm not too proud of how this one or the Roxy one I'm posting soon came out, but I tried!

Trollian Holiday

Yandere! Moirail! Stelsa Sezyat Short - Winter Event Request

Pairing: Pale/Moirail ♦️

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-neutral Darling, Human/Troll pairing, Implied kidnapping, Forced moirallegiance, Forced companionship, Forced affection, Slight manipulation.

“SORRY DARLING I HAD TO MAKE SURE I HAD SOME TIME TO SET ASIDE SOME GIFTS FOR YOU SINCE I HEARD YOU HUMANS DO RITUALS SIMILAR TO US AND IT MAY GET YOUR SPIRITS UP” Stelsa practically yells towards you before placing down some boxes in front of you on a table.

You stare dumbfounded at the mountain of strangely wrapped boxes containing unknown items. You hesitantly look at the busy troll. She gives you a quick smile before checking over each box. You shrink in on yourself… you still aren't used to any of this.

You've been quite thankful of Stelsa's company as of late. She's been one of the more welcoming trolls to a human like you on Alternia. She even gave you shelter from the acid rain.

Although… you don't seem to understand the intentions she has towards you. After what feels like days, maybe weeks, Stelsa started calling you a specific title. You don't understand why she calls you her “Moirail”... but it seems like an affectionate term?

She never allows you outside, which may actually be a good thing. Although… you can't help but think of home. You aren't used to all this alien technology and culture.

You appreciate the loud teal blood's company, yet you find her behavior unusual. She's always busy, her “Matesprit” occasionally visits, and Stelsa seems very coddling to you. You try your best to get used to it.

Unfortunately you continue to find yourself feeling like a prisoner… not just in this “Hive”... but on Alternia as a whole.

“I WASN'T QUITE SURE WHAT YOU LIKE SINCE HUMANS ARE QUITE ALIEN TO ME BUT I HAD ZIZI HELP ME OUT A BIT SINCE I'M SO BUSY” Stelsa rambles before placing a box on your lap. “BUT IT WAS THE LEAST I COULD DO FOR MY DEAREST MOIRAIL AND IT EVEN KEPT ME BUSY SO WHY DON'T YOU OPEN THE GIFTS”

You hesitantly open the box and look through the contents. You really don't want to do any of this. You have a hard time figuring out what the gift is due to its alien nature and place it down on the table.

Stelsa continues to watch you with an eager smile, quickly pushing another box into your lap. You try to tell her you don't really feel in the mood to do this. Stelsa only gives you a frown before trying to encourage you.

“IT'S OKAY MOIRAIL I GOT THESE ALL FOR YOU TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER YOU DESERVE TO ENJOY YOURSELF” Stelsa continues, sitting beside you to help you open the gifts.

Even if you wanted to refuse and just be alone, Stelsa wouldn't allow it. You continue to open the gifts under Stelsa's watchful eyes. One by one you unbox alien objects that you still can't figure out.

Despite this Stelsa seems very happy to watch you. She has a constant smile on her face with a fond expression. It's like she's just happy to see you opening the gifts… regardless of if they actually make you happy.

It's the thought that counts, right?

“They're all very… lovely.” You manage to say, Stelsa looking rather excited. “I just wish I knew what half of them did.”

“OH WHEN I HAVE THE TIME I CAN SHOW YOU BUT FOR NOW I JUST WANTED TO KNOW IF YOU FELT ANY BETTER AT MY HIVE NOW SURELY IT'S MORE COMFORTABLE THAN OUTSIDE IN THE HARSH CLIMATE I MEAN JUST LOOK AT YOUR SKIN YOU WOULDN'T LAST” Stelsa rambles again, gesturing to your skin with a frown.

“I guess so… I just miss home.” You find yourself sighing. Stelsa appears disappointed and a bit irritated at the response. Nothing she does appears to make her new Moirail happy… all they ever want to do is go home.

She doesn't want you to leave her.

You feel yourself pulled into a harsh hug against Stelsa. She's incredibly strong despite how she looks, making you quickly feel locked in. You panic momentarily but then feel Stelsa lightly touch your face.

She makes a soft shooshing sound towards you while doing the action. Supposedly this is meant to calm you down. Unfortunately you don't feel all that calmer.

“HONESTLY DARLING IT IS SO MUCH SAFER HERE” Stelsa says in the middle of calming you, her voice a bit softer. “I PROMISE YOU CAN BE HAPPY HERE AS MY MOIRAIL ONCE YOU'RE USED TO IT”

You aren't sure how long Stelsa tries to calm you. She appears to busy herself with “shoosh papping” you and rambling about trollian holiday traditions. To you it all just sounds loud.

You want to get out of her arms but can't. The tealblood refuses to let you go and doesn't spare any strength. You start to wonder if saying you want to go home hurt her.

You stay silent and allow her to get lost in comforting you with her strange alien affection.

You just hope she ends up leaving to do something else soon.

[phrogggslayer]

Happy Halloween!

Do you have any spooky scary day headcannons for our loveable security breach/ruin crew? If so I'd love to hear them!

Happy Halloween to you, too! (Sorry I'm late!) Here are some of my spooky day headcanons!

Glamrock Freddy: He really doesn't like Halloween. He hates being told to scare kids, and he's always reminded of Fazbear Entertainment's dark past when guests dress up like the old animatronics. And the fake blood on people's costumes bring up terrible memories. He does enjoy handing out candy, though.

Glamrock Bonnie: Bonnie really enjoys Halloween! He likes the change of pace in the Pizzaplex, and he loves the spooky vibe. Seeing how clever people get with their costumes is something he always looks forward to! Though since Glitchtrap, the fake blood is really triggering, and he doesn't get to interact much with the guests anymore. But after getting biofuel, he gets to munch on candy with Chica all night!

Glamrock Chica: Costumes! The end of October is just a big costume party and Chica is living for it! And the candy. The candy! She eats more than she hands out, but she loves that she's actually encouraged to eat as much as she wants for Halloween. She also likes to watch horror movies around this time of year!

Roxanne Wolf: Hell yeah, spooky season! Roxy loves the skeletons and ghosts and vampires! Getting to startle guests is also a plus. And seeing Chica dress up in costumes... But damn, when Chica asks to watch horror movies together, Roxy really struggles to hide how scared she is.

Montgomery Gator: Monty looks forward to it every year! He doesn't care about dressing up or the candy. But it's the one time of year when he's praised for being scary. He doesn't have to walk on eggshells around guests, trying not to be too intimidating. Halloween takes the stress off Monty and lets him enjoy his work.

Gregory: He's never gotten the chance to wear decent costumes, if any, but he'll be damned if he missed out on a chance for free candy. And since being taken in by the Glamrocks and Vanessa, he's got a Freddy costume! Which, in Freddy's opinion, makes Halloween worth it. Gregory also loves scaring the guests at the Pizzaplex. He and Monty often team up for a little chaos.

Vanessa: It used to be her favorite holiday! And then she was taken under Glitchtrap's control. And now everyone's costumes remind her of the stupid Vanny outfit she made and wore. She's always worried that one of the people dressed up will be another possessed killer. Gregory's trying to help her heal from the trauma, though, and she has to admit, making candy apples at home is a lot of fun.

Glamrock Helpy: Costumes? Candy? Yay! Helpy loves playing dress up and sharing his sweets with his family. He doesn't recognize the spooky decorations and costumes as "scary". It's just not in his programming. That red stuff on that person's mouth? They must have had a raspberry donut! Oh, but the cookies and pastries with silly faces make him giggle. He doesn't want to eat them, though. They look too fun!

Sun: Eh. They much prefer Easter. It's so bright and fun! But they adore the silly costumes children wear. And decorating the Daycare is always a plus.

Moon: Oh yes, Halloween is right up Moon's alley. The Pizzaplex lights are dimmed, and Moon is encouraged to go out and roam! They love dropping from the ceiling and startling kids before offering them a generous amount of candy from their hat. And they really enjoy decorating the Daycare with Sun.

DJ Music Man: He gets to play spooky music! DJ loves holiday music of all kind, but he only gets to play it at certain times of year. So he's definitely been planning some cool new tunes for Halloween all year! He is ready! And Moon visits him a lot during open hours during Halloween!

Cassie: Yyyyyyyes! Candy and costumes and freaking people out! She always makes crazy costumes out of whatever she has access to. It's more fun to make them than to buy them! And you bet she goes for scary. Spiders and ghouls and all sorts of monsters! But she always comes back to her Roxy costume. And no one will know if she does double rounds in the neighborhood for candy if she wears a different costume...

Patpat: Beep boop beeeep. Beep!

The Mimic: Gregory's never gotten the chance to wear decent costumes, if any, but he'll be damned if he missed out on a chance for free candy. She always makes crazy costumes out of whatever she has access to. It's more fun to make them than to buy them! They love dropping from the ceiling and startling kids-- And you bet she goes for scary.

(Let me know if there are any characters not mentioned who you'd like to see headcanons on!) Thank you for the ask!

[mmmmalo]

Rambling

Since turbans act as an orientalist motif in Homestuck, I thought I might try scanning for hijabs as well. "The Veil" was the first suspect, but textual support did not immediately materialize. At least not in the form of wordplay -- it's mildly suspect that the game's cloning equipment is within the Veil, since the first lab we see is associated with Mom, but since the meteors in turn become the sperm impregnating Skaia/the Earth, I'm hesitant to commit to the gendering. Maybe one of those "size of your mom's dick" kind of moments? Shrug

"Curtain" was the next search term -- apparently the word hijab originally described a curtain separating Muhammad's main house from the wives' quarters, for modesty. Presuming euphemism, it becomes interesting that Karkat (who I tend to read as Alternia's only Female) is determinedly buried behind thick curtains at the beginning of Meat, as though they were part of his feminine repertoire of hysteric fits and romcoms -- all the more so because Dave reasons it would probably be fine to throw stones in a glass house if curtains were up, insofar as stoning-as-execution is still proscribed under some interpretations of Islamic law. Going back to the Veil, this would imply the meteor strikes are framed as a planetary stoning? Which in turn brings about the mummy-shrouded Exiles, wandering the sand dunes. Unexpectedly tidy, if we permit that the narrative's need to denigrate the Terrorist overrides any strict gendering

Other instances of curtain don't scan as readily... the various "pay no attention to the X behind the curtain" Wizard of Oz jokes seem ripe for misuse, but nothing stands out... Jane's comment on the "right" side of curtain being the side where everyone can see you... it rings as passive aggressive in light of the Islamophobic superstructure, but unlike with Dave I can't identify a complementary signifier to affirm the superstructure's applicability. Mildly annoying. But if you /assume/ its applicability, gently coaxing Calliope out from behind the curtain and encouraging her to be herself likewise comes across as somewhat passive-aggressive, I suppose

All that stuff about Roxy's Void-based unknowability from the Epilogues had struck me a sexist mystification, but the association with veils of darkness gives the misogyny a certain orientalist flavor... and if that holds, Roxy's earlier blackout powers fall under the same banner...? I don't recall anything objectionable in the discussion of them though... If Doc Scratch's head is a turban, I suppose the grimdark blackout becomes Rose's veil, adding to the sense of assault that came with Scratch "smothering her with surprise noodles" (eroticizing the question mark).

The cue-ball/turban is also light, of course, and the matter of Karkat blocking out the light contributes to his feminine framing... though I suppose the same could be said of the Strider's sunglasses? "Those rare, intimate moments that Jake was allowed to slip off Dirk’s shades and look upon his face, unobstructed" might be leaning into the erotics of removing a lady's veil... as well as the general mystique built up around Strider Eye Moments. The artifact of Stoic Masculinity doubles as an artifact of Islamic Femininity. Textual affirmation in the form of puns isn't really forth coming, but the matter AR wanting to get out of the shades might have an undertone of cultural condescension akin to Callie and the curtain... especially since as "anime shades" that "literally only the Japanese could consider to embody the Platonic ideal of 'cool,'" the sunglasses are explicitly linked to the Orient

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

Something I still find so funny was the attempt at trying to recontextualize the epilogues scene where Candy Rose starts gushing about Kanaya and Vrissy as her just trying to encourage John to go face Roxy by the hsbc team, which not only makes zero sense because Rose doesn’t even name drop or even talk about John’s situation with Roxy, but the next conversation John has with Jake is the actual conversation that’s meant to push John into reconnecting with Roxy and Harry