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mementoboni · 2 years ago

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[part 3/4] DIR EN GREY WOWOW Interview & Document (2020)

"But looking at these, seeing Diru's behind-the-scenes production process, I still feel it's not easy, DIR EN GREY is really amazing." — Shinya

Notes before reading:

The whole interview is divided into 8 topics, and the translation is divided into 4 parts. This is the third part, including the 5th topic. The details of all topics and time markers are 👉 here.

I have added Chinese subtitles for this video in 2021. The whole interview was very meaningful, and I hope that with the English translation, more people can understand what they're talking about.

The five members were interviewed separately and then edited into a video, so the words spoken by each of them are not necessarily coherent.

Repost and share are welcome.🙌 I translated it all by my ears, so please feel free to correct me if you spot any mistake or any confusing parts.☺️

— — —

05. Member Feature

[ 薫 Kaoru ]

►Memories of the Band Formation

Kaoru: Even ONE MAN LIVE, we still didn't have the budget to decorate the stage. But we still wanted it, so we went to TOKYU HANDS* and bought Styrofoam, flower decorations, and wire or something like that. It's fun that we all made stage decorations in the house together. (*Note: "TOKYU HANDS" is a Japanese chain of home-based department stores specializing in selling DIY products.)

►Something of Recent Interest

Kaoru: I am often asked, but I can't think of anything. I don't want to do anything when I get home. This month, in June, "Neon Genesis Evangelion" (the movie) will be released, and I really like it. Kaoru: It's almost over, of course I also want to see it earlier, but after watching it is really over. I'm a little happy that it's going to be postponed, that it won't be released this year (2020), and that I won't be able to watch it. (Staff: Emotionally, you still can't accept it.) Kaoru: Yeah, yeah, it will feel like it's not the end yet.

►Opportunity for Solo Exhibition

(*Screen caption: Kaoru held a solo exhibition”ノウテイカラノ”in 2019.) Kaoru: The reason for the exhibition is that a few years ago my hands started to become a bit uncomfortable and I couldn't hold the pick properly to play the guitar, so I had to put the pick on my fingers with tape*. As a kind of rehabilitation, I started to draw and try to show some random things, but the story is not yet that rich. (*Note: Around 2014, Kaoru's hands began to show signs of abnormalities, which were diagnosed to be the occupational disease, caused by relaxation of the ligaments of the muscles or joints.)

►The Origin of「ノウテイカラノ」("nouteikarano”)

Kaoru: When I was a child, I often had a dream. I don't know if it was the sky or the ground, but there was a pure white place, and from far away, I could see a lot of dots, as if there was a large group of things coming closer and closer, and in an instant, they all swarmed towards me. Kaoru: Every night I would dream about it, and then I woke up with a start. I wake up every time I dream about it, and what happens after that? I imagine what happens after that, try to draw a picture like this, go back to my mind at that time and imagine it. (*Note: According to Kaoru’s scend book “Dokugen ni” (published in 2018) P.85, "ノウテイカラノ" means "脳底からの" (born from inside the head), just written in katakana.

►Influence on the Band

Kaoru: At first, I wanted to draw with a different feeling, and I felt that my creative power was stimulated, so I thought I could compose with a different feeling. But, rather, it seems to be more difficult to make a song. (laughs)

...

[ Shinya ]

►The Person You Admire

Shinya: I've been in a band since my first year of middle school. X was very popular in the class, and YOSHIKI-san's presence was very strong. At that time I decided to become a drummer like him, and I've always looked up to YOSHIKI-san since then.

►Memories of the Band Formation

Shinya: We used to compose in a studio in Osaka. There was a container-like studio, and I remember we stayed there for 3 or 4 days, composing the song together. The studio was rented, and we slept there under the blankets. Shinya: I never understood why we had to share a room*. The studio was in Osaka and we could just go home, so why did we have to spend the night there? I guess other members might have felt the same way. (*Shinya used the word "gashuku, 合宿")

►Reason for Not Changing the Style

Shinya: There are people who have liked me for a long time. Also, I can feel the beauty by keeping my old look, and that's why (I don't change my look).

►Opportunity to Start Solo Project

(*Screen caption: Shinya established the music group "SERAPH" in 2017.) Shinya: The concept was already there many years ago, but I felt that it was a bit taboo to have other band activities, so I didn't do anything. But around 2012 or 2013, I started to think that it was okay, so I went into it with the intention of trying it out.

►The Concept of "SERAPH"

Shinya: The theme is the various things that I see from heaven, about human beings, and that's what I'm expressing.

►Influence on the Band

Shinya: The drum part is the same as DIR EN GREY. After all, it's an expression of my own creation. In this respect, when I think of the drums of DIR EN GREY, there may still be some influence.

►Things learned from "SERAPH"

Shinya: I have to do a lot of things by myself in SERAPH, booking all kinds of things and so on. I'm quite happy to do it myself, or maybe I'm doing it because I like it. But looking at these, seeing Diru's behind-the-scenes production process, I still feel it's not easy, DIR EN GREY is really amazing.

...

[ Die ]

►Opportunity to Go into the Band

Die: I wasn't that interested in music itself before. I like listening to music, but I don't know anything about the bands. After entering high school, I saw the performance of senpais' copy band at the cultural festival. I was dragged there by my friends, and it was a shock to me. The first time I saw a live performance, I realized that it's the band. Die: Although I had no interest in it, I wanted to do something while watching it, and I formed a band with my friend immediately after the show was over. There was no one else (in the band). I was a drummer at first. (laughs) But it's boring to play rhythm all the time at home. After all, guitar is a melodic instrument, and there is an amplifier. I guess the guitar is more attractive to me.

►Memories of the Band Formation

Die: When we first debuted, we spent the whole day in the conference room of the record company, signing posters, changing signatures, and so on. Filming also started at 6 a.m., and it took about 3 hours for a person to put on makeup, it's usually over time at the end. I remember these things very well.

►Something of Recent Interest

Die: In my daily life, I naturally see and hear things like the Japanese music industry, and it feels really peaceful.

►Opportunity to Start Solo Project

(*Screen caption: Die founded the rock band "DECAYS" in 2015.) Die: As far as music is concerned, it's something I can't do at DIR EN GREY. I wanted to try and see how far I could go without the DIR EN GREY label. There is a part of me that wants to do it myself, or to challenge it.

►Things learned from "DECAYS"

Die: At first I felt like I had to make some changes, but instead, I felt like I was losing myself. In the end, I found that it is best to be myself, in the next process.

...

[ Toshiya ]

►Opportunity to Start Playing Bass

Toshiya: Originally, I just wanted to be a guitarist, but I didn't think I could play very well. At that time, I was thinking about what to do, and then I was attracted to the bass. I felt like I could see my future. Toshiya: There are many people who are called "Guitar Heroes", but few people remember "Bass Heroes". That means there is still room for me to develop, so I thought I would play bass.

►Memories of the Band Formation

Toshiya: When our band first formed, four members came to my hometown. It was winter and there was still snow on the ground. They all came from Kansai and rarely saw snow*. I was very impressed by how excited they were to see snow. (*Toshiya's hometown is Nagano. It is said that Toshiya's mother took the picture at the time and still keeps it at home in Nagano :D → TOSHIYA AT JOE YOKOMIZO CHANNEL 4th FEB TRANSLATION/NOTES 2/4)

►Favorite Artists

Toshiya: I like painting. Vincent van Gogh and Francis Bacon, I like both of them very much. The world of painting is usually a mixture of truth and fiction.

►Opportunity to Start the Apparel Brand

(*Screen caption: Fashion brand with Toshiya as creative director - DIRT) Toshiya: I think music and fashion are inseparable and both are very attractive. Music should be free to express itself, and in the same way, fashion should be free, too. Toshiya: When it comes to expressing oneself, everyone chooses what is acceptable to most people*. I don't like that, I think we should listen to our own thoughts more. (*Toshiya used the word "migimuke migi, 右向け右")

►Influence on the Band

Toshiya: Even if I'm designing clothes, I end up having something to do with music. Although this is a completely different field, it will eventually return to music and bands.

...

[ 京 Kyo ]

►The Person You Admire

Kyo: There are a lot of them. Now I'm not just targeting one person. When I was young, there were a lot of senpais that I wanted to become like them. But it's been more than 20 years, so now I don't take them as a target, just be myself.

►Interested Artists

Kyo: Haven't there "Kimetsu no Yaiba (鬼滅の刃)" recently? I haven't read it yet, it's super popular, isn't it? Generally speaking, if the sales are so good, it is difficult to end the series, right? There will be a variety of entanglements, such as the life afterwards, there are many to consider. Kyo: I think it's great to end the series like this, to end it at this time, with a sense of strength and determination. So if there is a follow-up manga in the future, I would like to read it.

►Opportunity to Start Solo Project

(*Screen caption: Kyo founded the rock band "sukekiyo" in 2013.) Kyo: The things I want to do often keep popping up. I think it's a shame not to do it, and I don't want to regret it.

►Influence on the Band

Kyo: I don't think so, but I feel less stressed (after the solo project). People who like DIR EN GREY say to me, "Don't bring sukekiyo to DIR EN GREY!" Sometimes people say that, and I'm not going to do that. Kyo: I was asked why (I want to form a sukekiyo), "Diru can do it, right?" It's because I can't do it (in Diru) that I want to do it! I don't know what criteria they used to say that Diru can do it, but I didn't do what I could do (in Diru). If you finish what you want to do one by one, you will be less stressed out.

(To be continued…)

--- --- ---

part 1. & part 2. & part4.

topics & time marks

中文翻譯 (My Blogger) part 1. & part 2. & part 3.

#dir en grey #kaoru #薰 #kyo #京 #die #toshiya #shinya #interview #interview 2020 #translations #video translation #diru translation #translation by yinfu #diru wowow 2020 #WOWOW interview #long post

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dovenart · 2 years ago

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I will disagree with this one.

What she did *was* grooming, even if it wasn't what most people think of when that word is thrown into the mix. She may not have molested any of her fans directly, but she was grooming them by the direct definition of it.

According to RAINN [link]

Grooming happens in stages, and what Colleen Ballinger did hits almost every single one of them.

Victim selection: Abusers often observe possible victims and select them based on ease of access to them or their perceived vulnerability.

She hand picked vulnerable minors, and brought them into group chats, DM'd them, or invited them to meet her in person at her shows and events.

2. Gaining access and isolating the victim: Abusers will attempt to physically or emotionally separate a victim from those protecting them and often seek out positions in which they have contact with minors.

She pulled these children, some as young as 11 when contact was first established, into multiple group chats and private conversations. One of them was called Colleenie's Weenies, where she would encourage them to share personal and intimate details with her, discuss extremely inappropriate things such as sex positions, virginity, and asking for pictures of them. One being asking a 14 yo boy for nude photos of his ass.

3. Trust development and keeping secrets: Abusers attempt to gain trust of a potential victim through gifts, attention, sharing “secrets” and other means to make them feel that they have a caring relationship and to train them to keep the relationship secret.

This is the definition of literally all of the DMs that have been leaked. She would encourage children not to tell their parents what they were discussing, saying that she viewed them as more than fans but as special friends, tell them how close she felt they were, etc. She's given gifts, including sending lingerie to a minor, tickets to shows, plane tickets to minors to see her after shows, etc. Even discussed her own personal life in inappropriate levels, such as explicitly discussing a divorce, and the sex life she'd had with her ex to a minor.

4. Desensitization to touch and discussion of sexual topics: Abusers will often start to touch a victim in ways that appear harmless, such as hugging, wrestling and tickling, and later escalate to increasingly more sexual contact, such as massages or showering together. Abusers may also show the victim pornography or discuss sexual topics with them, to introduce the idea of sexual contact.

No, she never had direct sexual contact with a minor that we know of. We know she spread a 16 yo's legs on stage and showed her body off to a large crowd without permission. We know that she's had minors as young as eight come onstage and reach into her pants to get snacks to eat in front of her as part of a "bit".

But she has also sent pornography to minors. Many minors. Many times.

She subscribed to Trisha Paytas's porn site, and later her onlyfans, in order to access her nudes and intimate videos. She would then save and send them to minors and friends, berating Trisha, making disgusting jokes about her weight and her body, asking minors if they'd ever done something like what was pictured. She had friends and fans hold up the nudes and take pictures with them to send to her to prove they were in on the joke as well. She hosted viewing parties on zoom, sometimes with minor fans included, where she would screenshare videos of Trisha preform sexual acts, so she could body shame and slut shame her as a "joke."

Beyond that, she would regularly get into those group chats, such as Colleenie's Weenie's, where she would interrupt conversations with minors to interject inappropriate, sexual questions and comments. One such screenshot was of her interrupting a 12yo and a 14yo discussing their day at school to ask "what's your favorite sex position?"

5. Attempt by abusers to make their behavior seem natural, to avoid raising suspicions. For teens, who may be closer in age to the abuser, it can be particularly hard to recognize tactics used in grooming. Be alert for signs that your teen has a relationship with an adult that includes secrecy, undue influence or control, or pushes personal boundaries.

She did this. All of this. She gaslit them to believing what she was doing was normal, that they had a proper and appropriate friendship, that they were special to her and this was how people were supposed to act in friendships.

Colleen Ballinger groomed children for professional and sexual reasons, and calling her a groomer is not overblown. Saying it was overblown and that the accusations against her shouldn't use the word groomer is minimizing the severity of the actions that have been proven with screen recordings, emails and voice recordings that have been released by the victims.

aaah I hadn't heard about the racism stuff. And also I'm not trying to defend her AT ALL, she's a pretty shitty person even if the grooming hysteria is *slightly* overblown. She obvs had really gross and inappropriate relationships with her fans & took advantage of them. She did something wrong and then got on her ukelele to cry about how she's the victim in all this.

I just kind of feel like the fact that the word "grooming" got thrown in and created a level of hysteria that was kind of unwarranted. Like she's bad but not like Michael Jackson level bad.

Does that make sense?

Ugh I should have known better than trying to use Colleen Ballenger as an example. She's a shitty person, we can all agree on that.

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etheriadearie · 4 years ago

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What if it's Adora's... and Catra's- Dream?

::It's been eight months since The Kiss and Catradora becoming canon in one of the most breathtakingly romantic and beautiful endings of all time. Now that we've all throughly gotten to enjoy that, I'd like to take some time to explore how Adora's dream might tie into everything having to do with its ending, as well as the entire romantic arc of SPOP.

This post centers on Adora's dream, with the goal of exploring the dream as a part of the Catradora romance. Really, truely, as part of their romance. Pardon my vagueness, because it is out of kindness: if you haven't finished the series, THIS IS A SPOILER WARNING. 🚨🚨🚨 ... If you don't like spoilers, now is the time to scroll on by, Horde soldier // Rebellion fighter!! (and please, return when you do- <3)

If you have finished the show, please consider joining me below, as i'd love to hear your opinion on the following theory...

💜💙💚💛🧡❤️💜💙💚💛🧡❤️💜💙❤️🧡❤️💜💙💚💛🧡❤️💜💙💚💛🧡❤️💜💙❤️

Hey Adora ~❤️

Are you still with me?

Good, then let's get this started-

It is highly probable that Adora’s 'dream' is a canon romantic moment for each of them, which not only Adora experiences, but so does Catra.

The dream is, instead, a spontaneous reaction of Etheria’s deep magic and their love, in particular because Catra is with Adora as she tries to save Adora through her love for her. They both share in the creating of the dream, but it's meaning is that of Catra showing her love to Adora: they are connected within the dream by way of this Etherian magic, which they have shared in before.

I say this because what we’re actually seeing is a simulation, much like the ones that Catra and Adora shared together during Promise: these simulations are based on memories and on emotions: it is Catra’s emotions which are being channeled as Etheria creates the dream for them.

We will indeed discuss the arc of their love in this post, but, this theory is based on the use of a oft neglected, but powerful, mode of storytelling:: Known as ‘visual cues’ this method of storytelling is employed by Noelle and Friends as the way to tell us the deeper meanings behind the dream sequence. And the use of these cues tells us that this is intended to be seen as a shared romantic moment for both girls, showing their love for one another.

I know, this might seem like a lot to process, after all, isn't what we see during the dream supposedly Adora’s subconscious response to Mara’s words of wisdom about love, when she asked Adora what she wants, and tells her to not give up?

And how would it even be possible for Catra to be in the simulation with Adora? To the former, Adora still had no answer to Mara’s question, like she didn't when Catra asked her what she wanted the night before. And in the dream, we watch as Adora spends almost all of it denying what she's seeing, believing she has failed her duty to save everyone as She-ra. Considering Adora’s resistance to the dream, does it make sense for the dream to be self actualized by Adora, or is what she sees originating from somewhere else, and if so, how?

As to whether Catra can be there with Adora, the answer is a resounding yes: and that's because we already know that Catra is in the dream with Adora, for part of the time. How we know this is that after Horde Prime traps Adora, Catra intervenes to save Adora and they interact: Catra reaches down to try and save Adora, ending famously with her beautiful love confession, which helps Adora find the strength to reach out to take her hand.

That we see Catra do this, and that she does it so purposefully, tells us that this is something that actually happens between the two of them:: Catra must have seen Horde Prime trap Adora, and Adora can see and hear Catra in her mind as she calls for her- Adora really does reach up to take Catra’s hand, and as she takes it, is pulled from the edge of death. It's not a metaphor at all, even though we know Catra is holding Adora's body in the real.

And so, if Catra was with Adora then, why not before, too?

To put it simply, all of the visions that Adora has, including her meeting Mara before the dream, is Etheria’s deep magic trying to help her, and so it helps to bridge the gap that's needed for Catra to share her love with Adora. After all, Etheria "is a living creature" (s5ep8) and Catra, actually, has a strong connection to Etheria’s magic, and to magic in general (we will revisit this later).

All that happens is tied together, which we'll talk about below: what Adora sees in the dream is the true beginning of Catra’s love confession, because Catra is coming through for Adora as her best self to save her, much like Adora did for Catra during Save the Cat.

::And that's where our visual cues come in, because as it turns out, the Dream and Save the Cat are related: they are related in storytelling and in emotion, but most importantly:: they are related visually.

This post will cover these similarities starting below. We’ll also take a look at two separate and distinct visual cues having to do with how Catra acts in the Dream to further the discussion, and lastly we'll cover how, in fact, all of Save the Cat and Heart Part 2 are related, starting well before the dream, continuing right through it, and afterwards as well.

But, to get this started, let's take a look at visual cue #1: when Catra offers her hand to Adora in her dream.

::During the dream, Adora has such disbelief when she finds herself in it, and she keeps this disbelief right up until the critical moment: when Catra turns to her and offers her hand to Adora, lovingly asking her if she's ready to go. That, is the moment when we finally see Adora give herself over to the idea of their love, she suspends her disbelief… only to have the moment so cruelly ripped away by Horde Prime...

As it so turns out, this sequence of events has happened before, almost exactly down to the frame by frame:: it happened during Save the Cat, when Adora offered her hand to Catra. These moments are visually similar, emotionally parallel, and story parallel as well. Here are the two scenes, and while you look at them, consider how the girls are arranged compositionally with each other:

What we have here is visual parallels, many more of which we'll discuss later. But, it goes deeper than that:: because on closer consideration, we see that the girls are arranged ‘mirror’ to each other. For example:

::In Save the Cat, Adora offers her hand to Catra from the left, and in the dream Catra offers her hand to Adora from the right-

::When Prime electrocutes Catra after she reaches for Adora’s hand, she falls downward on the right; when Adora is trapped by Prime, she sinks downward on the left, with her tears showing the direction of her descent (note, Catra’s tears were not depicted, but she is crying as Prime shocks her). This mirroring is shown repeatedly throughout the two episodes, and not just during the dream itself.

So why are these moments mirrored?

That's what this theory aims to prove, with all the muster that it can:: this mirroring is a purposeful artistic collaboration between the art and writing teams, letting us know by way of it, that we're suppose to understand how these scenes are parallel: with the meaning of this being that one girl is mirroring the other’s actions in order to save them.

Therefore, in theory:: what we're seeing during the dream is Catra mirroring the heroic love Adora shows for Catra during Save the Cat, and all of what we see in the dream is actually Catra showing her true love, is the true beginning of her love confession, and is done to save Adora. As for the other deeper, more involved reason, it is that Adora and Catra are actually parallel characters throughout the series, who vary by circumstance, but are struggling with much the same issues. (a discussion for another time, however)

For instance:: consider how similar the virus that Adora is fighting during her time in the Heart chamber is to the mind control that Catra fought in Save the Cat:: Prime is using the virus to control Adora, and she ultimately is able to reject Prime's control because of Catra’s actions- much like Catra did, after Adora showed up in Save the Cat to restore their love, telling Catra to fight Prime’s control, so that they can be home together again.

And here's the thing: if the artists and writers go to such lengths to make these scenes parallel… even moreso, the characters are mirrored, doesn't the meaning of it therefore demand that Catra be with Adora during her dream, to help her fight free of Prime’s control by showing her love to Adora, just like Adora did for Catra during Save the Cat?

Now really, what confirms this theory is the entire arc of the show, which, *puffs up cheeks* is a bit too much to cover here, so I'll save us some time and stick to a couple of themes instead. One of these will be the Catradora love arc, as it is integral to the next visual cues.

And these cues are that Catra’s truest love is shown during Adora’s dream, something which we don't see Catra do before this moment. So, sit tight for a bit, because this'll take some explaining-

Visual cues #2 and #3: Catra’s most earnest love is shown in the dream, and it's both what Adora needs to survive, and is fundamental to Catra’s redemption-

Redemption arcs are popular for a reason, and because the next cues relate so strongly to Catra's redemption, I'll be talking about how Catra’s redemption is fully realized by the honest and earnest love she shows for Adora, inside the dream as well as right before it.

In order for Catra to complete her redemption, or since that's cliche, ::for Catra to realize her best self:: she has to accept her truth as the absolute total romantic that she is, who through the braveness of her confession of love, is the one who helps their dreams come true, and brings Catradora into canon.

This is because, in all seriousness, Catra is and always has been a romantic, she's just blocked by her own traumatic experiences (plz consult Princess Prom if confused about how Catra is a romantic, 😼😹). And, she's always known she was in love with Adora- who, unlike Catra, never quite realizes her full feelings until Catra’s confession. And Catra needs to redeem herself by showing this love, because she chose to deny her love to Adora, as well as to herself, at the end of Promise after seeing how very little love and understanding Adora had to give to her in season 1. This next set of visual cues is all about how we see Catra’s feelings and actions change to reflect her true feelings of love, and that through accepting her own love for Adora, is able to help Adora to succeed in her final task.

::As Adora faces down her final challenge of disabling the Heart, Catra makes what could best be described as a decision of ‘radical love’: that she's willing to give everything she has- to help, love, and support Adora. We first see Catra’s decision to show such love right before the dream when she swears to stay by Adora’s side, and she then fully completes this love during the dream when we see Catra show her precious love for Adora.

In the dream, the Catra we see is much more tender, vulnerable, and intimate, than we’ve ever seen her be at any other time previous to this point in the series… her love is even more earnest than during their earliest memories as children. That's because we’re seeing a completely novel and honest expression of Catra's love, one which Catra hasn't been willing to show before this. Catra really needs to show her full feelings to redeem herself, not just a last second love confession. What we're seeing during the dream is her truest feelings, without her own self doubt or fears of vulnerability blocking her.

And this new love we see is part of the decision which Catra makes, right before the dream, swearing that she will stay with Adora no matter what, letting Adora know she has her full love and support as Adora faces her final task. This decision is the other half of the visual cue #2, and here’s the two moments together::

Is Catra ending up positioned so similarly just coincidence, or does it have deeper meaning as well? A couple things for consideration:

Firstly: Adora probably doesn't notice this shift in Catra’s behavior, especially before the dream, as Adora is completely focused on her burden of saving-the-entire-universe-along-with-every-last-person-in-it, which is rather a lot to expect one girl to do... even if she is She-ra. Also note: Adora is a romantically oblivious person, so there's that, too. And since she's so preoccupied by mortal peril, it really doesn't make sense for the sweet and loving Catra we see in the dream to originate from Adora’s subconscious, as Catra has never shown Adora this tender, loving version of herself: and so, it makes more sense that the magic of the simulation would be drawing from somewhere else entirely: it draws on Catra’s own feelings of love.

I know, these scenes vary in mood significantly, but the difference we're seeing in the dream is actually a heightened version of the love Catra shows before it, one where Catra is not only showing Adora that she values and supports her, but that Catra quite literally feels precious love for Adora. Catra clings to her, letting her know that she is treasured above all else, which is really, really REALLY sweet, and also really really not in line with how Catra has acted up to this point in the series...

Catra loves Adora, this is central to her arc, even during the times when she's aligned so strongly against her. Her story is about learning to accept her love, and she's reestablishing her love for Adora during these scenes... this is the total truth of her love and affection, that is.

She’s already established that she's willing to risk herself to protect Adora, such as when she tackles Melog on Krytis. But, Catra protecting Adora from harm physically isn't enough to fully redeem herself: she's also got to show the romantic love she feels which she denied to Adora so long ago. This love she feels is something that Adora continuously teases Catra over, constantly ruining the moment by misinterpreting Catra’s feelings simply as attraction, never fully realizing or acting on the romantic implications. This happened as recently as when Catra jumped into the fire to save Adora... Adora is a romantic idiot. (don't you worry, I say this with fondness) This is part of Catra's test: even though Adora never gives her a sign that she feels romantic love as well, Catra has to show her love because that's what it has always been about for her. Loving Adora properly means Catra has to accept Adora as she is, and not let her own romantic frustration block her. It's also simply the right thing to do, as they are out of time, and could all die if Adora fails... Adora's story, on the other hand, has been about becoming the hero, and Catra has to accept that yes, in total reality, Adora simply has never considered what she wants because of her burdens.

As Adora faces her final task and is feeling crushed by the weight of her burdens and fears of failure, Catra has to show this love to counter Adora’s own obliviousness and internalized emotional barriers, as Catra realizes how Adora really doesn't "get it" right up until Catra’s love confession. Adora is not seeing what she has to live for, and Catra's fully accepting Adora as who she is helps Catra to see how she can help Adora, because Adora's romantic awkwardness is really more about her emotional trauma than her love for Catra- Adora loves Catra, that much is clear. But is it romantic love? Catra takes a risk and shows her true feelings, because she knows Adora is struggling, and they are out of time... so no matter what, Catra has to show her romantic love to Adora, and luckily she's able to do so during the dream (because of the help of Etheria's magic).

We also need to talk about how Catra stands with Adora: in both moments she chooses to stand behind Adora. Catra is showing her true support to Adora, and her most honest feelings of love- something I discussed in my Promise discussion is how Catra never wanted power for herself, she just wanted to be safe, and to be with Adora. Here we have Catra, definitively showing after all this time that she doesn't want power, she just wants to love Adora.

The Catra we see in seasons 1-4 rejected Adora as She-ra, seeing her as two faced for ignoring and then abandoning her to continued abuse while fighting for others, breaking her final promise as she did. This was a trauma decision, but Catra is done letting trauma control her life. So here we see Catra choose to support and love Adora no matter what, like she always wanted to do, and she's even choosing to support Adora as the hero. This is further demonstrated as true during the dream, as Catra (albeit jokingly) asks Adora to save her from a determined Glimmer.

All in all, the Catra we see in the dream is very unlike anything we’ve seen before, she's outwardly in love, feelings which Adora herself feels but struggles to understand. And that Catra ends up positioned so similarity is a cue that Catra is allowing her true love to be shown during the dream. It's exactly what Adora needs to feel coming from Catra, as years of being abused and new hardships have convinced Adora that sacrifice is the only thing that makes her worthy of love- Mara tells her “You're worth more than what you can give to other people, you deserve love, too”. Sadly, when you watch this scene you see that Adora has a hard time accepting Mara's words, she shys away from them instead.

Catra’s choosing to stay with Adora, and then show her most earnest love inside the dream, helps Adora to see how she deserves to be loved: as the person she is, and not only as a hero. Catra is the only person who loved Adora before she was She-ra, and her love for her has never been about her being a hero, like Adora was told she had to be by Shadow Weaver.

That was something done out of malicious intent, as Shadow Weaver did it to control Adora and to prepare her as her sacrifice. Young Catra was there when it happened to Adora, and always knew that it was done out of some dark intent (hence her frustration during the battle of Thaymore- “Duhhh did yah just figure that out??”). Catra constantly shows that she is wise to manipulations.

... And Adora is still stuck on this trauma: the love that Catra shows Adora helps her see past her own hurt.

::Ok. I say this next part with all the sincerity I can: expecting Catra to carry the entire burden of their romance all on her own is rather a lot to expect her to be able to do. And yet… she does it. She's the one who confesses her love, she's the one who kisses Adora, and in the dream, she shows Adora that she's in love with her. This is because Catra is a person who understands what she wants. She chooses to have faith that their love is real, and so she shows her heart to Adora. How does Catra trust enough in love, considering her past mistakes, and all trauma that she's been through?

People mostly think that Catra post season 5 would be a person who is still in a state of hurting from her past, that she constantly struggles with self hatred and doubts. But, ask yourself: is that how Catra is portrayed, or do we see a person who has faced her trauma so that she can live free of it?

That Catra would be able to do this so totally is what I think throws so many people about Catra. After all, most people who have trauma struggle with it continuously, so why wouldn't Catra struggle like this too… people have a hard time accepting that she is able to change her behavior so much for the better. But, don't let that stop you from seeing her as she is presented to be, there's powerful reasons why Catra is like she is, Noelle wouldn't take a shortcut in this. The reasons are there... it's just… complicated.

Probably too complicated to cover here, but I'll try to summarize a theme here: Catra is a survivor. That's what her attitude is, and her arc. She's survived ever since that day when Shadow Weaver threatened to kill her as only a small child, and she’s survived many other near deaths and hardships getting to this point. And because of that, she's found what she really wants to live for, and she's become too strong against others hurting her to let them control her. This strength includes against her own bias of self judgement over her past actions, because she understands how her actions were the product of manipulative abuses by others who wanted to control her. She knows trauma, in fact she's somewhat blessed in this ability (see this meta). What Catra does during the dream and her love confession is to reject ALL of the trauma, the falseness, the negativity, and hurt that's been put into both her AND Adora all of their lives. She's way too strong to let her own fears block her, and as she sees Adora struggling with her own fears, Catra gives her full heart to Adora because Catra knows how important it is to want to live and to love, and if she can just get Adora to understand that too, then she can save her.

... because Catra is brave, perhaps the bravest person in all of SPOP, she comes through to save Adora from Adora's own fears by showing her the power of love. Catra sees Adora for who she is better than anyone else can: she sees her humanity, and her struggles. And seeing is very important to our next cue::

Cue #3 ‘I’m YOUR idiot’

During Save the Cat, as Adora watches Catra teetering on the edge of the platform, she implores Catra to keep on fighting. She tells her: “you've never listened to anyone in your life, are you really going to start now?”

Catra responds by very fondly calling her an idiot.

And Adora freely accepts this, saying:

“I know.”

Then we get this frame, as shown above: Adora sees Catra, and how she's always tried to find safety from those that would hurt her by not letting them control her life.

Catra only ever listened to one person: she listened to Adora, and their promise... hence the ‘idiot’ part. And Adora is saying, as she accepts being called an idiot, that ‘I should have seen it sooner, and why my love was so important. You always felt like you had to fight to survive, and I was suppose to be different than those who hurt you. I was wrong not to understand sooner, and I shouldn't have hurt you like I did.'

And she proves it to Catra with her next words: “I'm going to take you home.”

Home. The thing Catra felt she had lost when Adora abandoned her at the Horde. Adora is saying: ‘I know this is what you want.’

‘So, live.’

::In the second frame, we see Catra show absolute acceptance of her love for Adora. It's just like Adora accepting being Catra’s idiot: Catra is telling Adora: 'Don't you see how I love you? You tease me, but this is not because I like you, it's because I'm crazy about you. I'm in love with you. And I want you to see this, my silly, beautiful love. Because I want you to know how I love you. I should have seen why my love was so important sooner, and I never should have left you."

‘I do freely admit that I am your idiot.’

‘And I know you. I know that this is what you really want. And that it hurts you that you were made the hero, and how everyone expects so much of you, but they never seem to see how much it hurts you.’

‘And I know that what you want is to be loved.’

‘I see you. I know you.’

‘So... live.”

It's exactly what Adora needs to see to accept love, and not let her trauma stop her. This is part of what helps Adora overcome Prime’s virus so she can absorb the Heart's power: she needed to see that she's loved. Much like Catra did, back on Prime’s ship.

Sidebar discussion 1: thoughts regarding this theory-

How exactly does the dream come to be, how does Catra experience its creation, all of these finer points we kinda hafta leave to the 'magic' that happens. We can't know exactly how it happened, but maybe we don't need to.

As to why didn't they didn't just tell us, *if* this theory is true, that is- probably because She-ra's ending is beautiful, it's hard to imagine it being any more beautiful than it already is. It's worth watching again and again: not having everything spelled out for us just makes us want to watch it more. -etheriadearie

Part 4: How everything is mirrored starting well before the dream, as well as after🪞♾🪞

All of Heart Part 2 is a mirror of Save the Cat, starting from the very beginning. And, if you look carefully you can see stylistic elements repeated throughout each (mirroring, compositional arrangements, use of green in both to represent Prime’s corruption, etc.) They are different enough that each is worthy of being called an artistic masterpiece of its own, but everything in them is related, and what happens as Catra saves Adora is very much the story of Save the Cat being retold.

Catra’s decision to return to help Adora inside the Heart chamber is synonymous with Adora’s decision to face Horde Prime on his flagship. Neither have a plan worth mentioning, both know they could fail, but they have to try, no matter what. They love each other too much not to try.

… and the other is totally dismayed when they show up to save them, knowing how perilous their situations are, as they had resigned themselves to their fates.

Oh, hey Shadow Weaver. Looks like you slipped in to be a stand in for Horde Prime ? Could this be because you were the real villain of SPOP all along ?

Even though the one is so unhappy that the other is risking themselves like they are, each girl continues to fight to free the other. They need the other to see how much they care.

Above: Adora makes a similar declaration of love to Catra's in cue #2, more mirroring 🪞

Sidebar discussion 2: Catra’s strong connection to magic-

A subplot of She-ra is how Catra unlearns her negative perception of magic she has from it being used against her as a child by Shadow Weaver, and instead comes to see magic as something beautiful. Even though Catra professes a strong dislike of it “why does everything have to be so weird with you guys ?” (s5ep8), magic constantly seeks her out.

It starts during Promise, when Catra’s subconscious seemingly guides the memories they see, ending with her seeing her inner child's hurt. It continues in the Portal episodes when she's given up hope, and after trying to destroy herself, instead returns as Corrupted Catra, a magical being with knowledge and purpose. Then, in season 5, Melog chooses Catra, she nervously accepts their friendship and is surprised to finds them to be very good friend to her.

And so, during the dream, as Catra and Adora lie mere feet from the center of Etheria’s magic, it reaches out to help them- it is a living thing, and Catra welcomes its help, proving she has incredible harmony with magic, and by allowing herself to work with it during the dream, she completes her journey of unlearning her bias- because the truth of Etheria’s magic is love.

Like Adora's jumping off the platform after Catra falls, Catra refuses to give up, and finds a way to get to Adora~

Sidebar discussion 3: Horde Prime’s virus

Another bridge between our girls is that when the monster attacks Catra, she's infected by Prime’s virus along with Adora. This is another route by which their minds can be connected (see Catra’s right hand, above) which begs the question: is everything that Adora sees in the dream just an elaborate cruelty of Horde Prime's?

I'm going with no, because of the visions which Adora has before the dream. Most of them happen well before the infection reaches Adora’s location, and their meanings don't really make sense as part of Prime’s deceit. He also says “So this is where you've run to hide" when he interrupts Adora's conversation with Mara.

It makes more sense that it is as Razz says: "You cannot control magic, magic simply is" and the magic is communicating with Adora and with Catra. It is rather, that Catra manages to use Prime's virus against him, as she's faced his control before. Her personal knowledge of his technology likely means Catra knows to help Adora overcome his control, and this along with her confession, helps Adora to break free of his control.

As Adora struggles with her final duty as She-ra to stop the heart, feeling alone in the face of it because she alone is She-ra, the only one who supposedly can do it, she's feeling crushed by the weight of a millennia old war and other's past cruelties forced onto her life. She believes it's too much for her to do alone, and that she's not a good enough hero.

Catra’s ultimate answer to Adora is: 'Don't be.’

Catra is telling Adora to stop being the hero just long enough to realize what she already has, because she's not alone. She needs help, but it's right there with her- she doesnt have to do it alone, no one should.

And so, by asking her to stay, Catra is telling Adora: 'Forget about being She-ra, and right now instead just focus on wanting to live... because if you don't live, then I can't help you. I know, this is hard. But if you can just accept that you want to be with me, then we can figure this out, together.'

And that's exactly what they do- they face the heart together.

Adora accepts love, and so Catra is able to help her absorb the Hearts power.... because love is the strongest thing in the entire universe... 💞

A few closing thoughts regarding this theory: We don't have a lot of time with the romance between Catra and Adora, as their kiss is the apex moment. But, by way of these cues perhaps us seeing them in the dream at their most romantic is real. When Adora wakes up, she doesn't even have to say anything about what she saw- Catra was there, helping her. One of the reasons why the kiss and Adora's confession of love back to Catra seems so pure is because she's understanding Catra perfectly. In fact they both are, because of the dream they shared together.

Considering how short She-ra is, for them to actually share this romantic moment together would be is key. And I feel it makes sense that they do, as such a beautiful moment deserves to live on in their (our) memories... and a way by which they could share this moment may very well exist, *if* this theory is correct.

Noelle and Friends may have cleverly given us this answer, and as beloved as the dream scene is, I'd like to think that they're together during it. Either way, She-ra's ending is beautiful.

As always, thanks for reading... I hope that you enjoyed it. Hopefully it's not just stating the obvious ? Feel free to let me know- 😅 And I couldn't get to all of the endings complexities here (for instance, Adora's confusion on love and needing someone like Catra to show her the way is very interesting, and worth exploring), and, believe me I, too, have questions. Feel free to ask questions or give me feedback, as always I will try to respond!! Also, I will be posting something related to this regarding their arcs in the near future~ hopefully. Until then...

"Don't you get it ? I love you. I always have. So please, just this once. Stay!" 🏳️‍🌈💞💋🏳️‍🌈

~EtheriaDearie

::As always, thanks for a like or reblogg!! I'm still new to tumblr, so thank you for reading- ❤️🙇

P.S. Here's the short version of this post. Yes, the "cliff notes" 😅. For a quick share with your friends!!

#she ra #spop #catradora #she ra meta #she ra and the princesses of power #Catradora dream theory #my writing #she ra fan theory #she ra spoilers

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chilly-me-softly · 4 years ago

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Every Little Thing’s Gonna Be Alright • Chapter 24

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 - Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 - Chapter 14 - Chapter 15 - Chapter 16 - Chapter 17 - Chapter 18 - Chapter 19 - Chapter 20 - Chapter 21 - Chapter 22 - Chapter 23

And there's the end! Thanks to everyone who read, left comments or liked it. My longest story ever, a real pain 😅. I admit I got a little lost here and there but I enjoyed writing it. There will be more chapters but I still have to decide some things so I don't know if or when they will be published... anyway I hope you like this last one x

The situation at home is awkward. Evelyn wanted to find the right moment to talk to her brother but that moment never seemed to come. She would stare at him, spend most of her time with him and yet she couldn't get those words out of her mouth. Engrossed in her own head, she hadn't noticed that the same thing was happening on the other side. Ben had an important decision to make too, or maybe he had already made it and it was only communicating it that scared him.

And one evening Evelyn had just put Cece down but didn't want to go to bed so she slowly closed the bedroom door behind her and made her way to the living room. But in the silence of the house she changes her mind and slips into Ben's room, settling into his bed and holding him close.

He immediately sighs squeezing her back, "What are you doing?"

"Remember how many times mum nearly had a heart attack because she couldn't find me in bed and I was sleeping with you?"

"How can I forget... when you slept alone I worried" she chuckles softly before sighing.

"I miss that. Being young and not having the world on my shoulders and being able to hide in my big brother's arms and feel better immediately"

"We're grown up, but that doesn't mean you can't count on me no matter what" for a moment she thinks she might burst into tears at any second, but she takes a deep breath closing her eyes to calm herself. "Even though we'll be far apart, we'll always be there for each other. Promise me Lyn"

"Ben" for a moment she thinks he knows, but it can't be. Jack promised her that he would give her all the time she needed and at the very least give her a heads up. So she tries to turn to look at him as if she could see him in the dark, but his grip is so firm she can't so she sighs "I promise, I promise"

There's silence for a few moments in the room before Ben sighs and releases his news, the one he's been holding in for a while now. "I might be a Chelsea player next season"

Evelyn snaps to her seat as soon as she processes those words, making a fuss to lean over and turn on the light hitting Ben in the process. "WHAT? Oh sorry! Ben that's great"

"Shh don't wake Cece up" Ben pulls her down but she gets back up again, resting her elbow on the mattress and looking at him proudly.

"You know I always knew you were destined for great things"

"Fly down. I said I might, it's nothing official yet"

"Well they'd be really stupid to let you go at this point: you're talented, you're a hard worker and you've got a pretty face too which never hurts" the two giggle as Ben lightly hits Evelyn with his foot and she then sits back down, her arm almost tingling.

"Why don't you look happy B?"

"I am" he states bringing his knees up to his chest and resting his arms on them, his hands brushing against each other from time to time.

"But there's something that doesn't make you live this moment to the fullest. Is it Deb?" she asks, but he's already shaking his head.

"I'll ask her to come with me if I accept" he admits slightly embarrassed as always when it comes to his personal life, but still sharing a smile with his sister who knows what it means. And she wishes them all the best because they deserve it, and not because they are the two people who have been closest to her in the last period but because they are good together and deserve all the good things that can happen to them.

"Is that for me?" Evelyn doesn't even give him time to think about changing subject, seeing him shift awkwardly from his seat sighing slightly.

"It's just... I worry about you. And Cece. It scares me to leave you here alone, because I can't ask you to follow me. Not now that you've found some kind of normality anyway"

"Ben" his name comes out more or less as a whisper, she doesn't even know if he heard it frankly. So she clears her throat slipping towards him and moving even closer, "We said you wouldn't worry about us any more than you have to"

"How can I?" when he looks up Evelyn can clearly see his inner struggle, and her stomach clenches in a painful grip. "I know I'm not her father but I love her, I love you and I can't help but worry about you as well since we live together"

"Benjamin James Chilwell are you really thinking of not taking the chance of a lifetime for a burbler and a whiner?" Evelyn tries to keep a straight face as she nonchalantly wipes away a tear that is silently rolling down her cheek.

"Family. For my family"

"Damn it Ben" she hits him on the arm between his laughter as she thinks it's now or never, if she doesn't tell him right then it's going to get harder and harder and she'll end up telling him the day she leaves. So she takes a deep breath.

"You know it's a good thing then that Jack asked us to move in with him. And that I said yes" next thing she knows she's on her back on the mattress with Ben moving his fingers over her body making her laugh and her trying to free herself.

"I can't believe it, what a bastard! You could've told me sooner!"

"Eh what can I say... I feel a certain pleasure in seeing you struggling" she sneers still trying to catch her breath as he drops down beside her.

"I promised you Ben, this time will be different. I won't make the same mistake twice" his hand goes to intertwine with hers, "Accept that contract if you think it might be the right move for your career, Cece and I will always be there to support you even if we can't see each other every day"

"I love you"

"I'm proud of you"

"Damn it!"

"Are you okay babe?" Jack yells from the other room where he and Cece are watching TV.

"Yeah" Evelyn lets him know clenching her teeth as she glances at the dog and places the container in her hand on the table.

"You need to stop that okay? One of these days I'm going to break something. Or you can hurt yourself"

"Babe who are you talking to?" Jack walks into the kitchen confused as she rolls her eyes.

"Your dog. He always has to get in the way"

"He just wants to play" he chuckles taking the dog and giving it some attention, "Look"

"It's annoying. I almost regret when he kept his distance as soon as we got here. And no, don't look at me like that. You have to stop"

Before she can say or do anything else, Cece comes running crashing into Evelyn's legs and laughing making Evelyn sigh just looking at Jack. He chuckles giving the dog one last pat before letting him go, "He just wants to play babe"

"I want to play babe" the little one states nodding as Evelyn picks her up, eyebrows arched in surprise.

"What did you just say?" the little girl repeats smiling as Jack hides a smile with his back to the two washing his hands.

"No no. Mh-mh. I'm not babe for you, I'm mommy"

"But he calls you that!"

"He's my boyfriend, he can"

"I can too! I'm your girl" Evelyn sighs knowing she can never win that battle, while Jack can't contain himself anymore and bursts out laughing.

"This is all your fault"

"How come?"

"You're a bad influence on her"

"Nah that's not true, she loves me. You love me don't you?" the little one agrees nodding as Jack pokes her tummy.

"Oh yeah? Well since you two get along so well, you can give her a bath tonight" she handed the little girl, who immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, winking at him.

"Yay! Lots of bubbles Jack?"

"As many as you want" and as the two of them walk away discussing the big plan that is taking a bath, Evelyn looks at them smiling getting lost in her thoughts.

Although it wasn't her first move, it was certainly the heaviest of all. Both emotionally and physically. Packing up her things and watching Ben do the same felt reassuring, but as soon as she remembered the different paths they were about to take, the nostalgia came flooding in. But there wasn't enough time to dwell on everything that Cece was calling for her attention and so it was back to square one, choosing what to pack for the moment and what not to, looking after the baby, spending time with Ben before going their separate ways...

Jack had made sure she had everything she needed, to make her feel as welcome as possible. They'd taken time to get everything set up, to make his house theirs, and she'd slowly gotten used to calling it home. And she really hoped it would be the last trip for her daughter, a permanent arrangement.

And she didn't have any big problems at the moment except for that dog. She'd never had a chance to complain about it, even when they came and went from that house the animal's behaviour had always been impeccable. He and Cece made a well-matched pair and there had been times when she'd actually thought about giving them both away, but then Jack would always calm her down. Recently though, he'd started following her around, getting in her way more than once or simply resting his face on her legs when they were on the couch watching TV. Talking to Deb about it, the girl had suggested that maybe her period hormones were the cause of the animal's sudden attachment to her, a hypothesis she had immediately ruled out because, firstly, it had never happened before and, secondly, she wasn't on her period.

However, that chat had put something in her mind, something she had not yet given a chance to sink in and had not yet checked above all.

"I wanna another baby" Jack surprises her that night after a thousand stories to put Cece to bed, alone in the living room brightened by the shades of light from the screen.

She looks at him. All she can think about is his choice of words. There had been moments: the first time Cece had called him dad, the time he had referred to her as his daughter, the first time she had referred to him as daddy in such a natural way. Yet each time, having the certainty that he considers her his despite everything, is like the first time. Like he'd never done it before. "Another?"

"Yeah. I want to add another member to this family, give our daughter a sibling. Can you imagine?" Evelyn can't speak, she's visibly emotional and Jack notices this as he replaces his dreamy expression with a more concerned one.

"I don't want to push you though if you don't feel like it yet. I know I'm not her father, well at least not biologically, and I don't want you to think it's for-"

"I think I'm pregnant" she then interrupted him giving voice to that thought that had been torturing her for a couple of days and it took him a moment to process those words.

"What? That fast?" and she laughs straddling him taking his face in her hands, leaving a tender kiss on his lips.

"I'm going to be a father?" he murmurs, his eyes sparkling as his hands go to brush against what is her stomach.

"I don't know for sure yet. I still have to take a test but I'm optimistic"

"Why haven't you taken one yet?"

"I guess I was scared. Last time I was pregnant I..."

"Oh honey, listen to me. I'm not leaving you anytime soon, okay? If you're pregnant, if you're carrying my baby right now... leaving you is the last of my thoughts. Trust me"

"I know that. I just-"

"Need someone to remind you of that once in a while. And that's what I'm here for" Evelyn leans in again to kiss him before standing up and offering him her hand which he accepts without hesitation.

"Where are we going?"

"To find out the truth"

Evelyn and Jack look at each other, unable to hold back a smile as Ben enjoys Cece sitting on his lap, helping her with the slice of bread in front of her. Since they had gone their separate ways, those lunches were commonplace to spend time together and they had learned to treasure those moments.

"Uncle B" Cece lifted her head bringing a crumb to the boy's lips, "what's a little sibling?"

"Oh...well a sibling is someone you'll love dearly when mum and dad have another b- wait" Ben lifts his head looking at the two in front of him, "A sibling? Why are she asking me about a sibling? Lyn" a glance is worth a thousand words as surprised and incredulous happy expressions appear on both of their faces before they get up to hug them.

"I knew it! I knew there was something different about you today!" Ben holds Evelyn tightly to him after putting Cece down, overjoyed for his little sister and the new life that will soon fill their lives.

"The dog, he knew all along"

"You 're damn right" Evelyn chuckles at Deb's statement as the boys look at them confused as they play dumb.

"I'm sorry man, this time it's your turn to take all the whining"

"Hey! Watch your mouth" Evelyn points her finger at him as Jack hugs her from behind, one hand going to gently caress her side.

"It's true! You used to cry a lot, about everything"

"Not about everything"

"A lot" Ben insists on pointing out, as his sister sticks her tongue out.

"Eh it is a bit true" Jack puts in earning a dirty look from her trying to push him away, "but I don't care. I'm ready to experience it fully, with the good and the bad too"

Later that day everyone seems to have collapsed around the living room, everyone except the two brothers. Ben signals for Evelyn to go out into the garden and the two of them walk off without waking anyone up.

"Quite a nice day" the boy relaxes on the deck chair in the green space closing his eyes for a moment as she settles down next to him.

"You called me out here to talk about the weather?" she teases him turning her head to look at him.

"And to tell you that I'm proposing to Deb this weekend"

"Ben! I can't believe you kept this from me all day" a gasp as she smacks him on the arm.

"It's not like I could exactly yell it out" he excuses himself turning for a moment to look at the glass door, "and I couldn't tell you with Cece around"

"You're right, I forgive you" she chuckles acknowledging that the little girl could have blurted it out at any moment without meaning to and ruin everything.

"Aw my big brother" she pinches his cheek as he tries to wriggle out of it by slapping her hand away, and for a while they laugh acting like they're kids again.

"Do you remember when you showed up at my house?" sighs Ben after a moment and at her nod, he continues, "you said there would be no more chances for you to find someone. Well looking at you now you could say you were wrong"

"You want to make me say it Ben?!" she looks at him cheekly before they both burst out laughing.

"I just want to... look at us. Me almost engaged, you almost a mother of two. For being the only members of the 'Boo love by Chilwell' club, it hasn't gone so bad"

"Oh my god, shut up! I totally forgot about that! We weren't normal kids"

"We never were" and it's like they've run out of time to spend alone as the little one of the house comes in rubbing one eye claiming Jack is still asleep and doesn't want to wake up.

"Oof I really hope my children can have a relationship like ours. You are and will forever be my best friend" she says sincerely, smiling and closing her eyes for a moment before standing up as Ben leaves a kiss on her temple.

"I will always be with you"

"Hey so about what my brother said earlier..."

"There's no need, like I said I want it all"

"Yeah but I just want to say one thing" she stands up on her toes to leave a kiss on his lips and he's already with his hands on her waist bringing her down not breaking the kiss. "I can feel this time will be different. I won't cry"

"Hmm how come?"

"Because I'm happy now"

----

Tag: @alexajanecollins @emwritesfootball @rosie7703

#every little thing's gonna be alright #my writing #original #football imagine #football imagines #jack grealish #jack grealish imagines #jack grealish imagine #ben chilwell #ben chilwell imagine #ben chilwell imagines

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missdawnandherdusk · 4 years ago

Text

The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe

Hufflepuff!Reader X Draco

The tricky thing is yesterday we were just children

But now we've stepped into a cruel world

Where everybody stands and keeps score

So here you are, two steps ahead and staying on guard

Every lesson forms a new scar

They never thought you'd make it this far

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

Summary: Planning for something in theory is easy... putting it into practice? That’s where the weak are separated from the strong.

A/n: Hello my lovelies! So here is the second part to the last chapter!! If I had posted it all at once it would have been over 20k words so... yeah. I split them up. Also, this gets pretty dark and well, we all know how HBP ends... so I guess that’s a warning. And to add, this went in a completely different direction than I planned, but now it’s closer to my original idea so... Let me know what you guys think! Seriously, I thrive on your approval. (Also, I’d like to see if someone notices a MAJOR problem for these two kids... because I barely caught it myself)

“Oh, my darling boy,” Narcissa crooned, nearing Draco’s bedside. She took his hand though he was in a spell induced coma and could not hear her.

“I’m so sorry Narcissa,” I teared up. “I...”

“Snape explained it all my dear,” She consoled, reaching out for me. “You have nothing to apologize for,”

I all but collapsed in her arms, breaking down into tears as she held me. Though Abby and Pansy—as well as many others including Ernie, Blaise, Greg, Vincent, and Hannah—had comforted me and offered me a solace, it was different having a mother there to hold me and tell me it was going to be alright.

“It was awful,” I sniveled. “I thought... I thought...” I began to hiccup with the lack of oxygen due to my tears.

Narcissa shushed me softly and rubbed my back in a soothing rhythm.

“You’re alright darling,” Her voice was gentle. “Everything’s going to be alright,”

She stayed for the remainder of the night and came back the next day. I was only allowed a day off from classes before I had to return though Draco had still not woken. Though I knew there would be rumors and whispers, and though I expected to have to retell the harrowing story again and again, everyone already seemed to know. And more surprisingly, each student I came across was sympathetic and kind to me and even towards Draco, wanting to know how he was faring. Yet the thing that took me back the most was the amount of Gryffindors who offered their sympathies to Draco, rather than siding with their own Golden Boy. Even McGonagall offered her sympathies.

And for the most part, I completely ignored Harry. The best I could. Which... well. I’d like to say that I did, but I can’t. To be fair, he did try to talk to me on my first day back, two days after his attempted murder.

“Y/n,” He rushed out in the Great Hall as I sat down with Pansy and Abby.

“You need to stay away from me,” I gritted out, glowering at him. “You’re a coward!”

“Look, I didn’t know what the spell would do, okay?”

“No! That’s not okay!” I stood. “You almost killed him! And you would have! Why in Merlin’s name would you use a spell if you didn’t know what it did!?” Bristling, Abby had to place her hand on my arm before I drew my own wand. Her gentle hand allowed me a moment to take a deep breath and cam myself, ever so slightly. “Just get out of here Harry. Don’t... don’t talk to me,”

“Come on, mate, let’s go,” Ron pulled Harry’s arm back, sensing the rising tension in his best friend.

“You’re... you’re not really going to...” Abby asked softly as we sat back down. “About being the bad guy?” She was almost timid to ask.

I sighed and shook my head.

“No,” I admitted. “I just said it because I was mad and scared. I’m not gonna go off and join the Dark Lord,” a sad smile played at my lips. “I... I feel like I have no choice... This path was forced into me because of Precious Potter and I... I don’t want to be angry. I don’t want to be broken... but I don’t want to be walked on,”

“And you don’t have to be,” Pansy encouraged. “We all have your back,” Pansy nodded to the Hall. “We’re on your side,”

“I don’t want there to be sides!” I dismayed, scrubbing my face. “I don’t want to be divided because we still do have the same enemy and...” I let out a sharp breath in defeat. “When did it all become so complicated?”

Abby said nothing but wrapped an arm around me, soothingly rubbing my shoulder.

“It’ll all work out, you’ll see,” She encouraged, sharing a look with Pansy. “For all of us.”

After dinner, as I always did, I went and saw Draco. His steady grey eyes trailed me as I rounded his cot.

“Hey,” He offered softly as I slipped my hand into his. Despite his many blankets and long sleeves, his hands were still ice cold.

“Hey,” I echoed sadly. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” There was little confidence in his voice. “How’s class without me?” I scoffed and stared at the intricate carvings on the pillars of the infirmary.

“It’s not the same... nothing is the same...” The depressing thought left my lips before I could stop it. “I do miss walking to class with you though,” A small smile played at my lips at my gaze returned to him.

Wordlessly I reached out and brushed a few stray hairs from his face, my fingers ghosting over the pale pink scar that ran along the side of his face. Maybe fortune was on our side because though his skin was marred with scars, the spell hadn’t left permanent damage to his senses. His skin was still chilled under my touch.

“You’re still cold,” I murmured. “Do you want tea? Another blanket? I’m sure there’s a warming potion around here somewhere,”

“I’m alright,” His lips tugged upward. “Pomfrey and Snape said that it might happen, because of the Dark Magic...”

Worrying my lip, I nodded and intertwined my fingers with his pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles.

“What’s on your mind?” His question was soft.

“Nothing and everything,” I smiled. “Little Lotte thought of everything and nothing... but loved most of all, when she went to sleep, to hear the Angel of Music...”

“Haven’t read that one in a while,” Draco mused softly. “I think they’re having a show in London over the summer holiday...”

I wanted to snap at him. I wanted to say that it was stupid to think about the summer. It was foolish to think we’d survive the semester. That going to the opera shouldn’t be a plan we made on some false hope that we’d actually make it.

But I didn’t.

Instead I entertained the idea. Just for a while. Even if it would hurt later.

“You’d take me then?” I mused.

“Well, of course,” Draco smiled, enjoying that I was playing along. “Of course, Pansy and Abby would come with us,”

I laughed softly at the thought. The false memory of the four of us in some opera house amidst twinkling lights, dressed lavishly, laughing and having fun. I could see myself on Draco’s arm as he held his head high, smiling soft at my antics. I could almost hear Pansy scolding Abby for her poor etiquette. I could almost feel the thrum of the music in my soul and the magic of the performance before me as I was enraptured again by another story.

“I’d like that,” I whispered softly, tears stinging my eyes.

“Then think of it done,”

A silence fell between us.

“Can I stay here tonight?” I asked softly.

“Would you expect me to say anything but yes?” He quirked an eyebrow.

Curled up in his arms, again I thought of everything and nothing, utterly exhausted—mentally, emotionally, physically. Draco still offered a sweet comfort that I had never found in anyone else. A comfort that quelled my anxieties and allowed me to sleep soundly.

“Told you she would be here,” I heard Pansy whisper harshly. “It’s not like it’s the first time they’ve done it,”

“Yes, yes, you’re so smart,” Abby said flatly. “They’re still precious, aren’t they? Even now,”

There wasn’t a response. I shifted through my sleep logged thoughts and blinked my eyes open. Draco was still fast asleep beside me, his mouth hanging slightly open as gentle breaths passed through his lips. Abby and Pansy were forgotten as I watched Draco bathed I the soft morning light.

“Hey Feathers, Dumbledore wants to see you,” Abby nudged my arm. “I don’t think it’s good either.”

Fear and dread struck my heart as I froze.

“Did he say why?” I squeaked out, carefully slipping out of the bed, not to rouse Draco.

“No, just that it was a serious matter,” Abby frowned at me. “Are you okay?”

“Do you really want the answer to that?” I mumbled. “Please stay with him, tell him where I am when he wakes up. And if he tries to come and find me, make sure he doesn’t. He’s still healing,”

Timidly I made my way up to Dumbledore’s office, a list of a thousand things that could go wrong sprinting through my mind, willing them all true. Those thoughts however, changed and funneled when I saw that I wasn’t alone in his office with him. No, Harry, Snape, and McGonagall were all present along with the old headmaster.

“Miss Y/l/n, thank you for joining us,” Dumbledore smiled kindly.

“Yeah... okay,” I closed the door behind me. “What’s this about?”

“What happened in Myrtle’s bathroom,” Snape informed with a monotone voice. “Though I have thoroughly explained that what Harry did to Mr. Malfoy was much worse and you acted in self- defense,”

“Uh... okay...” My eyebrows furrowed. “What exactly did I do?”

“What did you do? You used an Unforgivable!” McGonagall dismayed.

“You tortured me!” Harry exclaimed.

“You attempted to murdered Draco!” I shot back. “What was I supposed to do!?”

“As I said, she acted in self-defense.” Snape cut the tension with his calmed voice.

“That wasn’t self-defense, that was malicious intent,” Harry growled. “You have to mean the curse for it to do any damage,”

“Oh yes, and I’m sure your use of Dark Magic is completely justified,” I snapped, crossing my arms. “And are you really going to play the victim when I have every right to loathe you?”

“Miss Y/l/n,” Dumbledore interjected. “We are not here to point fingers, but rather here the entire story. Both sides.”

“Why isn’t Sprout here?” I looked around. “She’s my Head of House... shouldn’t she be here?”

“This isn’t a House matter,” Snape clarified. “This is a matter of the Order,”

“Of which you are a member,” McGonagall finished. “Now please, your side of the story,”

My mind processed this information then I began my tale.

“Draco was having a panic attack, so I led him to the nearest quiet place that I could find—”

“Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom?” McGonagall clarified and I nodded.

“I was comforting Draco—walking him through grounding and Harry burst into the bathroom. Draco got defensive of me, drawing his wand, and Harry cast a hex at the two of us... I remember telling Draco to stop... there was water everywhere. And then Harry,” I glanced over to the golden boy who was sulking in his chair. “Cast whatever awful spell that was. I didn’t think. The Unforgivable was the first spell that came to mind...” I paused, drawing in a sharp breath. “Then there was so much blood. Merlin...” I wrung my hands together in a desperate attempt to wash my clean hands of blood that was no longer there. “I did cast the spell, and I’m not going to apologize for it. I’m sorry for hurting you, but not for defending Draco,”

“I see,” Dumbledore nodded. “Well, it seems that all’s well that ends well,”

Harry and I both sputtered, glaring each other down.

“She should be going to Azkaban!” Harry exclaimed.

“Oh, you should really keep your comments to yourself Potter,” I snarled.

“If I remember correctly Mr. Potter, you also cast an Unforgivable at Bellatrix not last year,” Dumbledore raised an ancient eyebrow at a fuming Harry who instantly fizzled out.

“You cast an Unforgivable and you have the nerve to accuse me! Oh, stars above Harry where does it end with you!?”

“That doesn’t count! She was trying to kill me! She killed Sirius!”

I stared at him in quelled anger. “Funny,” My voice was calm and even. “I could have sworn I did it for the same reasons,” I watched the color drain from his face. “But I get it, I’m not the Chosen One, I don’t get free passes, do I?”

“Miss Y/n,” McGonagall warned.

“Am I free to go? I need to get back to Draco,” I looked to Snape.

He gave a seldom and I rushed out of the office, practically running back to the hospital wing. Abby caught me in her arms, stilling me outside the door.

“Hey, talk to me,” She demanded. “What happened?”

“Harry needs to mind his own damn business,” I growled. “He told that I used an Unforgivable against him after he tried to kill Draco. After he already used one last year! And he has the nerve—”

“Y/n?” Draco’s shaky voice was a lot closer than I thought it would be. It had to mean that he was up and walking.

“Dray?” My anger softened to concern and hope. “Draco what are you doing up?”

“You could have given us more of a warning about how much he would fight us after telling him that Dumbledore wanted to speak to you,” Pansy muttered, Draco’s arm slung around her shoulder.

“Sorry?” I offered, taking Draco’s weight, freeing Pansy. “You need to stay in bed,” I scolded him softly.

“How could you think that I would? How could you just leave?” His voice was trembling and uncertain.

“I know, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking,” I led him back to his cot, setting him down gently. “Forgive me?”

He nodded as I pulled the blanket back over him. Pansy and Abby aided me in getting him settled again.

“This is so stupid,” He groaned. “I should be there with you,”

“A few more days, my love,” I comforted softly, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Then you’ll be back beside me,”

__________________________________

Draco’s eyes met the plated silver. His reflection mocking him. His pale skin was decorated— was that the right word? Ruined, perhaps—with faded pinkish scars.

Of course, his mother had been livid. Visiting him in the hospital wing more days than not until he was medically cleared to go back to class, she was there, pacing, muttering, threatening, demanding.

Your sentiments matched his mother’s but ever since the fateful day that Harry had taken him inches from death, you had gone silent with a cold ruthless fury. A look that only faded from your eyes when they met his. Then adoration was evident. Love and dedication was evident. Kindness.

As he stared at his reflection, the phantom memory of pain danced along his skin.

“Hey there handsome,” Your gentle voice caught his attention. Catching the sight of you in the mirror he turned, leaning against the vanity.

“I don’t remember you ever calling me that before,” He mused, slightly teasing—part of him wondering if you were just saying it to make him feel better.

“I know you Draco,” You pressed off the doorjamb you were leaning against and took his hands. “Self-assured, confident, absolutely gorgeous,” A smirk hinted at your lips. “But I know you’re unsteady right now.” Gently your fingers traced the scars on his hands trailing up his arm making him shudder.

“And what of you?” He asked softly, bringing your hand to his lips pressing a kiss there softly, reveling in the warmth of your skin; something that he had lost, his skin retaining an icy chill with the dark magic that plagued it.

“What of me?” You countered softly. “I’m quite assured that I’m beautiful to those who matter to me... call it vanity,”

A chuckle escaped his lips, your words reminding him of Pansy. “No, that’s no mystery. You are stunning,” Your arms draped lazily around his shoulders as you waited for him to continue. “Are you okay? I know you, and you’ve been... I don’t know. Withdrawn? Distracted?”

He feared the anger that flashed in your eyes until you seemed to blink it away. With the fluttering of your eyelashes the ire turned to sorrow. Your shoulders rose and fell with the deep breath you took.

“I’m tired of being walked on. I’m tired of people underestimating me. Of thinking I’m harmless or weak.” You paused but then your eyes met his pleading, “I know who I am, I really do. I’m just tired of other people not seeing it.”

Draco smiled at you, reaching up and caressing your cheek delicately. “And?” He knew you had more on your mind.

“I’ve had enough of Harry thinking he can get away with anything.”

Draco nodded. Before his prejudices against Potter had been just that—prejudices. Now? Now they went so much deeper. The hurt and pain that Harry had caused to you and him was something that couldn’t be brushed off. Draco’s anger matched yours when thinking of Potter, but maybe the difference was he had never seen it from the outside looking in.

“He almost killed you Draco,” Your voice wavered. “If Snape hadn’t shown up, you would have...” Tears pricked your eyes and you quickly shut them. “I can’t... I can’t lose you... and I never want to feel helpless like that again,”

Draco cupped your face softly, your eyes meeting his as quiet streams of tears trailed down your cheeks.

“And you won’t have to, but my love,” He sighed softly and pressed a kiss to your forehead before drawing you into his arms, “I don’t want you to lose yourself... I know you’re angry, and I know you’re scared... I know you wish it would all just go away, because I do too,” He sighed deeply. “But we can’t lose focus on who we are,”

“When did you become the wise grounded one?” You pouted into his shoulder, earning a small chuckle from him.

“Some girl brought me back down to Earth,” He mused.

“Must have been some girl,” He could hear the smile in your voice.

“Oh, she’s quite wonderful, I think you’d love her. I know I do,”

“Sap,” You accused, smiling up at him.

“And yet you love me anyway,”

“I do,” You pressed up on your toes, your lips brushing against his softly.

The day that he returned to class, as expected, he got plenty of stares. Students gawking at him and whispering behind his back. Not that it was new for him. But maybe you were right—he was unsteady. You still held his hand in the halls though, and still looked at him as you would a piece of artwork. And whenever he became uncertain about his appearance your gently smile and soft kisses created phantom memories that kept him grounded.

“Ginny and Harry are together,” Hannah gave off hand one day at dinner.

Draco’s eyebrows raised in surprised. Your face soured a bit as your eyes drifted over to the Gryffindor table where sure enough Harry and Ginny were sitting together amidst their friends. He pressed a kiss to your temple, pulling you a bit closer. The pout didn’t leave your face, but your focus reverted back to your friends before you.

Draco hadn’t spoken to or gone near Harry since he had been back to class. The only real struggle was Potions, but Harry seemed content on ignoring him, and with Ernie as Draco’s partner, Draco’s thoughts weren’t consumed with Harry. Ernie was actually quite pleasant in class, Draco had to admit. Though he was a bit reckless and impulsive in a childlike manor, but he wasn’t impossible for Draco to work with. In fact, Draco almost preferred to work with Ernie because Ernie didn’t treat him any differently after his near-death experience. It was a vein of normalcy.

“This should work,” You lowered your wand, running your hand over the mended Vanishing Cabinet. “We should be done,”

His eyes met yours. There was hope in your warm eyes. Draco gave a seldom nod and grabbed an apple from his bag. It was the first test. Though weeks ago, the apple had made it to Borgin and Burkes, the live finches you had sent hadn’t survived. You mourned the small birds and buried them beneath your tree by the lake.

The apple was closed behind the wardrobes doors and after counting to thirty, your hand gripped tightly in his, Draco opened the door again and saw that the apple had a slice cut out of it. You let out a steady breath and went to the golden wire cage, with gentle grace setting down the small bird into the wardrobe. You closed your eyes, refusing to watch as he closed the door this time. Thirty seconds again, he opened the door, and the small finch was there, staring up at the two of you, an apple slice in his mouth.

You let out a scream of excitement and joy as you gathered the bird into your hands and kissing its small head before setting it back in the cage to enjoy its treat.

The next was a crow, easily transfigured from a goblet. Draco ser the bird into the cabinet and closed the door yet again. The ruffling of wings faded for twenty seconds until he heard frantic cawing and agitated movements. Throwing open the door, the crow flew out. With a quick flick of your wand the crow was a goblet once more, falling harmlessly into the piles of rubbish around the two of you.

“I have to go,” You breathed out, words that he had been dreading.

“Y/n,” He refuted. “We don’t know if it’ll work for larger animals, Pinnae might not make it.”

“It worked for the crow,” You pointed out. “Pinnae can make it,”

“It’s too dangerous,”

“Draco,” You gave him a flat look. “I need to go,” You took his hands into yours. “It’ll be okay, I’ll be back. If not, I’ll just fly back here from Diagon Alley.”

“You make it sound so simple,” He nuzzled his nose to yours.

“Because it is,” You smiled, pressing your lips to his fleetingly. “I’ll be back, I promise.”

“Please be careful,” Draco dismayed as your morphed into Pinnae, fluttering into the base of the wardrobe.

Then he closed the door, trapping you in darkness. Thirty seconds had never been so long.

There was a knock on the door then it slowly opened. Your smiling face was shining as you crawled out of the cabinet.

“It works,” You breathed out, amazed.

“By Merlin it works!” Draco exclaimed, spinning you in his arms.

You laughed and held onto him tightly. The two of you celebrated with laughter that turned to tears. When the entire world seemed against you two, at least one thing went right.

“I love you,” You sniffled through tears.

“Stars, I love you too,” He breathed in the scent of you deeply, burying his head in your shoulder. “We’re gonna make it,” He was almost hopeful.

“We’re gonna make it,” You affirmed.

“Who’s there?”

You and Draco froze, staring at each other in paralyzing fear.

“Hello?” The voice called again.

You sagged and let out an aggravated groan. “It’s Trelawney,” Gritting your teeth you let go of him, sighing. “I’ll go see what she wants. You get to Snape and tell him we do this tonight.” There was fierce determination in your eyes.

Draco nodded and watched as you made your way toward the exit. He could hear your faint conversation with the professor. Giving you five minutes head start, Draco slipped from the Room of Hidden Things undetected.

“It’s done,” Draco panted out, catching his breath after nearly running to Snape’s office. “The raid has to be tonight,”

“I see,” Snape rose. “And you’re certain?”

You burst into the office just then, also out of breath. “Harry and Dumbledore are leaving to go find something called—”

“Silencio!” Snape casted the spell on you, proving you mute. Infuriated, Draco drew his wand, stepping between you and the professor. “Calm down, she’s in no harm,” Snape rolled his eyes and lifted the spell. “But be careful with what you speak. It is wise to hold your tongue.”

Fuming, you nodded still.

Draco lowered his wand and took your hand.

“Now, you both know the task ahead of you?” Snape questioned. Silent nods affirmed the question. “Very well. He will be pleased, Draco. Very pleased indeed.” Another silent moment passed. “You have twenty-three minutes.”

Draco took your hand and pulled you into the hallway and along the corridors.

“Go, find Abby. Warn your friends. Warn your house. No one needs to get hurt. We’re already doing enough damage,” His voice was soft and gentle as unshed tears lingered in his eyes.

“I love you,” Your voice broke as he cupped your face and pressed his lips to yours desperately.

The kiss was hasty and despairing. Though neither of you would admit it, you both knew that it was a kiss goodbye. The warmth of your breath against his was the last of your warmth that he expected. The urgency of your fingers in his hair was the last of your comfort that he sought. The taste of your mouth was the last of your sweetness that he accepted. The softness of your lips was the last of your peace that he pursued.

“Twenty-three minutes,” He breathed out before letting you go and heading down to the murky waters of the Slytherin Common Room.

The Mark on his arm burned and Draco knew that Snape had called the others of the raid. A plan set into motion long ago, now coming to fruition.

____________________________

“Y/n!” Abby called my name as you burst into the common room. “What’s going on?”

My friends were all gathered in the common room as Abby tossed to me something small and shiny. A galleon. My galleon. From D.A. I might have cursed.

“How does he even know?” I chucked the galleon into the fire, watching it ricochet a flurry of ashes. My eyes met Abby’s. “It’s tonight,”

She nodded, knowing what it meant, knowing what was expected of her. A plan made long ago, that was now set into motion.

“Okay, this is going to get very bad, very quickly.” My voice trembled as I looked at all of the horror-struck faces before me. “But please, I need you all to keep the younger years safe. I need you to stay out of the halls until Abby comes and gets you.”

“But what about you?” Ernie asked.

“Look, you’re going to hear things. Awful things about Draco and me. And I can’t deny them, nor should I ask for your forgiveness. But please,” Tears streamed down my face. “Believe that everything I’ve worked for... everything I’ve done has been for this family,” I looked around the room. “I don’t have much of one by blood, but you? All of you... you’ve always been my family. And Hogwarts is my home.”

Abby’s arms wrapped around me and I could no longer hold back my tears. Soon there was a massive comfort pile and I was in the center of it. My friends, my family all there, all holding me close.

“So, what do you need us to do?” Taylor asked. I wiped my eyes and stood tall.

“Someone get word to the Ravenclaws and the Gryffindors that they need to stay in their dorm. You all have about fifteen minutes to be completely locked down. Cast protection spells. Silencing spells. Comfort younger years. Distract them. Do not take an order from anyone unless it’s Abby. Make sure she is not under a spell before you listen to her.” I glanced over at her. “This is a grave matter and lives are on the line tonight. One of which is mine. I don’t know what will happen tonight, but I won’t be coming back. Not for some while.”

“But why?” I didn’t see where the question came from.

“It will all be revealed soon. I love you all. And I hope that you all can forgive me after tonight. No matter what you think of me, please, don’t forget: have courage and be kind.”

They all nodded. I rushed up to my room, changing quickly into dueling robes, pulling my silver cloak on.

“Are you okay?” Abby asked, tying her hair back.

“I’ll be fine,” I drew her in for a hug. “Please just get out alive,”

“You too kid,” Abby smiled weakly, taking my hand. “Sister for life,”

“Hufflepuffs for life,” I finished, looking back one last time before taking off through the window and into the night.

With a soft thud I landed on Draco’s floor. He was expecting me. We didn’t embrace another, but instead got to work.

“The Hufflepuffs?” He asked.

“Warned and locked down. Word was sent to Ravenclaws and Gryffindors. The Slytherins?”

“Secured.” Draco affirmed. “Seven minutes,”

“Okay,” I nodded. “The Mark,”

Draco looked out his opened window and chanted something short and unfamiliar to my ears and I watched as a snake coiled from the end of his wand in a thick green smoke and into the sky merging with a skull. I took his hand, standing beside him.

“I still don’t want to kill him,” Draco confessed. “But I’ll do anything to keep you safe,”

“Draco don’t worry about me. Your mother and I have a plan if things go wrong.” It was an easy lie as I met his confused grey eyes. I smiled softly. “You don’t have to be afraid.”

“The Astronomy tower,” He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Go,”

I leapt out of his window again and circled the school, patrolling, watching two figures on brooms land on the tower I was destined for. The quiet night was eerily quiet as I landed, perched on a sill, watching Harry and a frail looking Dumbledore. I almost slipped out of Pinnae because of the regret that fluttered in my chest, but it was easily pushed aside.

I watched as Harry hurried over to the door leading to the spiral staircase, his hand just meeting the door as I heard running footsteps from the door opposite to Harry. My eyes trained and waiting for Draco missed whatever had caused Harry to keep fleeing.

“Expelliarmus!” Draco shouted, and I sprang into action, catching the wand in my claws and settling back on the sill.

Standing against the ramparts, very white in the face, Dumbledore still showed no sign of panic or distress. He merely looked across at his disarmer and said, “Good evening, Draco,”

Draco stepped forward glancing over to me then to the empty room. He was making sure that we were alone. I wanted to warn him that Harry was close, but I couldn’t not yet. Draco seemed to figure this out on his own however, as his eyes fell upon the second broom.

“Who else is here?” He demanded.

“A question I might ask you.” Dumbledore eyed me before his attention reverted back to Draco. “Surely you’re not acting alone,”

“No,” Draco said. “I’ve got backup.”

“I see,” Dumbledore said as if Draco’s actions were praiseworthy. “And won’t you join us Miss Y/n?”

Draco glanced to me, panicked. That wasn’t a part of the plan. I wasn’t to be human at all. No one was supposed to know that I was there. Not the Order or the Death Eaters and certainly not Bellatrix.

“I know that it’s you my dear, you might as well join us,”

It was a wildcard neither Draco nor I were expecting. Draco gave a seldom nod, looking utterly defeated. Against my better judgement, I morphed back human, wand in my hand as I took my place at Draco’s side, adrenaline and anxiety threading through my chest.

“You always were such a talented witch,” Dumbledore praised. “I assume you had a hand in this plan, finding a way to get the other Death Eaters into my school?”

“Yes,” I answered, my voice shaking.

“You do complicate things don’t you my dear,” Dumbledore’s eyes fell upon me. “To think if Mr. Malfoy never had you, what would have become of him.”

“I don’t dwell on what might have been,” My eyes narrowed at the frail headmaster. “But rather what is to come,”

“Ah yes, your little job,” A twisted smile curled on his face. “Well, then, you must get on and do it, my dear boy,” said Dumbledore softly.

Confusion flitted across my face. Did Dumbledore know what we were here to do? How long had he known? Why the bloody hell hadn’t he said anything? A tense silence fell between us and I could faintly hear the fighting of Death Eaters and The Order occur somewhere below. I winced at the mental images.

“Draco, you are not a killer.” Dumbledore smiled. The words sounded cruel coming from his mouth rather than mine. Condescending.

“You don’t know what I’m capable of,” Draco snarled, gripping his wand tightly.

“Oh yes, I do,” said Dumbledore mildly. “You almost killed Katie Bell and Ronald Weasley—”

“That wasn’t us,” I interjected. “You really think I’d allow that?”

“Well you are here to kill me, are you not?”

Silently I seethed, gritting my teeth.

“It wasn’t us,” Draco replied coldly. “And we never figured out who it was,”

“Very curious,” Dumbledore mused. “But you were saying . . . yes, you have managed to introduce Death Eaters into my school, which, I admit, I thought impossible...How did you do it?”

Neither of us said anything. The echoes of the fight below were deafening. My blood ran cold, torn between who I needed to win. One to protect Draco and I. One to protect my family.

“Perhaps you ought to get on with the job alone,” Dumbledore taunted. “What if your backup has been thwarted by my guard? As you have perhaps realized, there are members of the Order of the Phoenix here tonight too,”

“The Order is here?” Frowning I met ancient blue eyes.

“You think I wouldn’t have back up at my own school?”

Betrayal washed through me. I had no idea that the Order was here. That they were the guard against the raid that was merely a plan b. I never wanted them to get hurt. Why wasn’t I told that they were here? Wasn’t I apart of the Order as well? Then it dawned on me.

“You... you manipulated me!” I shouted. “You never wanted me as a part of the Order! You just wanted to keep an eye one me! Never for one moment did you believe in me!”

Draco winced at the realization of my words, as he took my hand, grounding me.

“Who was I to go against your father’s wishes?”

“My father is dead because he believed in you,” I spat.

“He died for you. Not me.”

I growled dangerously.

“But never mind all of that,” Dumbledore waved the thought as if it were something easily dismissed. “And after all, you don’t really need help... I have no wand at the moment... I cannot defend myself.”

I ran my fingers over Dumbledore’s wand in my hand. It was urging me on, daring me to cast an Unforgivable. Begging me to. If I didn’t get my fury under control, Draco might not have to kill Dumbledore. Because I would.

A silence fell again.

“I see,” said Dumbledore patronizingly. “You are afraid to act until they join you.”

“I’m not afraid!” Draco snarled, though he still made no move to hurt Dumbledore. “It’s you who should be scared!”

“But why? I don’t think you will kill me, Draco. Killing is not nearly as easy as the innocent believe... So, tell me, while we wait for your friends... how did you two smuggle them in here? It seems to have taken you a long time to work out how to do it.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” I hissed. “We had the plan since this past summer. We could have easily done it by Christmas, but Draco and I deserved another year together at our home,” My words dripped venom as they met the crisp air.

“We had to mend that broken Vanishing Cabinet that no one’s used for years. The one Montague got lost in last year.” Draco explained because anger claimed my voice, deeming me silent.

“Ah.” Dumbledore’s sigh was half a groan. He closed his eyes for a moment. “That was clever... There is a pair, I take it?”

“We don’t have to explain anything to you,” I whispered, my eyes closed as I tried to reign in my anger.

“I see,” Dumbledore smiled. “But I suppose that I was incorrect when I assumed that you were not sure you would succeed in mending the cabinet and acted rashly? It does leave me to wonder who did almost kill Ms. Bell and Mr. Weasley.”

Draco’s grip on my hand tightened. He didn’t like the loose end any more than I did. “If you suspected us, why didn’t you stop us then?” Draco demanded.

“I tried, Draco. Professor Snape has been keeping watch over you on my orders —”

“He hasn’t been doing your orders, he promised my mother--”

“Of course, that is what he would tell you, Draco, but—”

“But nothing!” I interrupted. “I think Narcissa means a bit more to Snape than you do,”

“We must agree to differ on that, my dear. It so happens that I trust Professor Snape —”

“That’s marvelous,” I deadpanned. “But trust isn’t the same as loyalty,”

“Isn’t it though?” The old professor seemed as if he were having a hard time standing on his own without the help of the railing. I almost offered my aid. “But as for being bout to kill me, Draco, you have had several long minutes now, we are quite alone, I am more defenseless than you can have dreamed of finding me, and still you have not acted...”

Draco glanced to me and a gave a soft smile. The fear and uncertainty in his eyes caused my anger to morph into a fierce protection.

“I see,” Dumbledore went on. “I wonder why Voldemort has let you live so long Miss Y/n. You really do hinder Draco from what is expected of him,”

“Shut your mouth!” Draco snapped. “She is the cleverest, most brilliant witch I’ve met! If anything, she pushes me past what I should be and into who I am!”

“And who are you Mr. Malfoy? Are you a killer?” Neither of us answered. “There is little time, one way or another,” said Dumbledore. “So, let us discuss your options, Draco.”

“My options!” Draco scoffed. “I’m standing here with a wand—I’m about to kill you—”

“My dear boy, let us have no more pretense about that. If you were going to kill me, you would have done it when you first disarmed me, you would not have stopped for this pleasant chat about ways and means.”

Draco’s aspiration to kill Dumbledore might be fading, but my desire for it was growing with each moment that passed as I untangled a web of lies and manipulation in silence about the frail headmaster before me.

“I haven’t got any options!” Draco despaired. “I’ve got to do it! He’ll kill me! He’ll kill her! He’ll kill my mother!”

“I appreciate the difficulty of your position,” said Dumbledore. “Why else do you—”

“No,” The fury in my voice was cold and unforgiving. “Don’t. You. Dare. Don’t you dare make yourself the martyr. You have no idea the hell Draco and I have been through together. Your chosen one almost killed him for Merlin’s sake, and you have nerve to offer a false kindness? As if you were blameless? As if you understood?”

“No, you can’t,” Draco agreed to the weight of my words.

“Come over to the right side,” Dumbledore continued as if I had never spoken, “and we can hide you more completely than you can possibly imagine. What is more, I can send members of the Order to your mother tonight to hide her likewise. Your father is safe at the moment in Azkaban...When the time comes, we can protect him too. Come over to the right side, you are not a killer...”

“Like you protected my father?” I whispered softly. “When will you see we are on the side of good. But we’re not on your side.”

Dumbledore did not speak. His mouth was open, still trembling, as if to find the right words to manipulate us back to his side.

But suddenly footsteps were thundering up the stairs, Draco and I turned, in fear. We were both buffeted out of the way as four black robes burst through the door.

It seemed the Death Eaters had won the fight below.

A lumpy-looking man with an odd lopsided leer gave a wheezy giggle. “Dumbledore cornered!” he said, and he turned to a stocky little woman who looked as though she could be his sister and who was grinning eagerly. “Dumbledore wandless, Dumbledore alone! Well done, Draco, well done!”

“Good evening, Amycus,” said Dumbledore calmly, as though welcoming the man to a tea party. “And you’ve brought Alecto too... Charming...”

The woman gave an angry little titter. “Think your little jokes’ll help you on your deathbed then?” she jeered.

“Jokes? No, no, these are manners,” replied Dumbledore.

“Do it,” said the stranger standing furthest from me. He had a deep raspy voice and almost barked the words. All of my instincts told me to run from this man.

“Is that you, Fenrir?” asked Dumbledore.

“That’s right,” Fenrir barked, and I understood. Fenrir Greyback, the savage werewolf. “Pleased to see me, Dumbledore?”

“No, I cannot say that I am.”

Greyback grinned, showing pointed teeth. Blood trickled down his chin and he licked his lips slowly, obscenely. “But you know how much I like kids, Dumbledore.”

I choked back a sob, struggling to stand upright. Faces of my family flashed through my mind. Whose blood was on my hands and on his teeth? My world spun as I tried to get it back into order. Draco’s arm wrapped around me, trying to keep me upright.

“Ah, the little harlot,” A familiar voice cooed. “I should have known you’d be the one to stop Draco from his task.”

My eyes flashed up, meeting Bellatrix’s.

“She’s actually helped quite a bit,” Dumbledore interjected. “She has my wand, and she’s the one who made your arrival possible,”

“Shut up you old fool!” Bellatrix sneered. “Now come along little prince, we are short on time,” There was an urgency in her voice that made me hopeful that perhaps the Death Eaters hadn’t won but merely escaped.

“Draco, do it or stand aside so one of us—”

I didn’t take note into who was speaking because just then, from the door that Draco had arrived, came Snape, rushing forward and taking in the scene before him. His eyes met mine then went to Draco’s before settling onto Dumbledore’s.

“Severus...” The plead startled me. My eyes turned to Dumbledore who for the first time tonight was begging.

Snape said nothing but walked forward and pushed Draco and I roughly out of the way. Draco steadied me and we both moved to the back wall, watching the other Death Eaters—even Bellatrix fall back without a word.

Snape gazed for a moment at Dumbledore, and there was revulsion and hatred etched in the harsh lines of his face.

“Severus... please...” Snape raised his wand and pointed it directly at Dumbledore.

“Avada Kedavra!” It wasn’t my voice or Draco’s. But rather Snape’s.

Time around me slowed. Or maybe I could register everything around me all at once.

Dumbledore staggered back, falling, falling, falling down. Bellatrix cackled victoriously. Draco was a solace beside me, clinging to me as if I was his only lifeline.

“Out of here, quickly,” Snape ordered, glaring Draco and I down, a snarled look on his face.

He seized Draco’s cloak and forced him first through the door, with me trailing not far behind Draco. I didn’t bother to look who was behind me. Darkness fell over me and I proved blind. All I could do was cling to Draco’s robe and pray that wherever this darkness led, that there was a light somewhere at the end.

The darkness lifted as the starry night sky stretched before me letting me know that I was on the grounds of Hogwarts, not far from Hagrid’s.

“Go! Off the grounds and disapparate!” Snape ordered. “Go home!”

Draco and I stumbled as we ran through the dark. I wished nothing more than to morph into Pinnae and fly away, but I knew it was impossible. Just as we were at the outskirts of the grounds, Draco had to pull me out of the way of a bright red flash.

“Stop righ’ ‘ere!” A gruff voice called.

“Hagrid!” I called in relief until I realized I was no longer wanted here.

“Y/n?” Hagrid seemed just as confused as I was. “Wah are you doin’ ou’ wiff a bunch o’ Death Eaters?”

“I’m so sorry Hagrid,” I yelled into the darkness as Draco and I kept moving towards our freedom. “Take care of Steve, please!”

The distraction was enough to let a few black robes step foot off campus and disapparate. I turned back, a mistake, and saw Harry sprinting towards us, malice and torture in his eyes.

“I was right about you all along!” He shouted. “Don’t you dare show your face here again!”

Before I could respond, mostly just wanting to scream in frustration, Snape intersected the two of us, allowing Draco to grab my arm and pull me off the grounds.

“Y/n!” He called. “You need to disapparate! Go back to the Manor!” His eyes were wild and wide.

I nodded and wand in hand, I landed softly into the foyer of the Manor.

Of home.

chapter 11

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it-fits-i-ships · 3 years ago

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Combing through every single episode of Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous for Yasammy moments to write meta analysis about part 2 (parts 1, 3, and 4)

After Yaz breaks her ankle we have this moment of Sammy expressing her gratitude and admiration, Sammy wants to let Yaz know she sees how strong, brave, and deeply caring Yaz is but, as Brooklyn points out, Yaz isn’t in a place to hear her and needs time and space to process her feelings about Sammy’s secret double life as a spy, she goes into self-defense mode and pushes Sammy away again Just as a side note, I find it really interesting how Brooklyn reaches out to Sammy to give her advice about Yaz, Brooklyn is the one who caught Sammy spying and it’s Brooklyn’s phone that Sammy stole and accidentally broke so I think it’s very cool of Brooklyn to step in because she can see that Sammy is hurting over her fallout with Yaz and is in desperate need of a supportive friend Sammy definitely backs off trying to talk to Yaz but continues to show her care and concern in little ways like asking the group if there is another way to get to the dock besides going on foot so Yaz doesn’t hurt herself more, on the monorail when Ben gets carried off by Pteranodons and they assume that he’s dead it hits all of them really hard, Sammy starts to panic and Yaz forgets for a moment that she’s supposed to be mad and instinctively comforts her before remembering all of their circumstances, Sammy can’t help herself when she sees Yaz fall as they’re running for the dock after the group has to abandon the monorail and rushes over to check on her, Yaz is clearly still angry and refuses Sammy’s help, but by the time they actually reach the dock we can see that Yaz has realized she really does need Sammy’s help and support (both physically and for emotionally) and that there are worse things that could happen than Sammy telling some lies for her family’s sake, at this point we can see that Yaz has decided to work on forgiving Sammy and trusting her again because she initiates contact with her by casually placing her elbow on Sammy’s shoulder at the dock This trend of re-establishing their bond continues as the show enters season 2, in which the group is still stuck on the island and has to find the emergency beacon, we can see Yaz and Sammy huddling together for comfort and to keep each other safe when they have to hide behind a fallen tree from some dinosaurs, we also see Yaz lean on Sammy and give a relieved sigh once Darius gives the all-clear and she stays there for a while, when Yaz accidentally brings up Ben we can see that she’s still processing how much his apparent death has affected her and the rest of the group, Yaz is now clinging to Sammy not because she is afraid Sammy will stop liking her or talking to her like she was in season 1 but because she needs the positivity, support, and encouragement that Sammy brings to her life in order to help her through all of the emotional turmoil that being on the island is putting her through Also, Sammy helping Yaz up, helping her walk, and otherwise supporting her in any way she can is just so sweet, I know Sammy is a very positive and helpful person and she does what she can for everyone in the group but she has always gone above and beyond when it comes to Yaz, she even convinces Yaz to stay at camp and rest while she, Brooklyn, and Darius go look for supplies (with such a gentle tone and soft expression that Yaz has no choice but to embrace the love and care that Sammy is putting out there), Yaz clearly wants Sammy to stay with her but I think Sammy realizes that it’s not good for Yaz to only depend on her so she gives Yaz a warm smile before she goes but she still leaves with the others so Yaz can grow and Sammy can contribute to the whole group, this sets up the beginnings of a much healthier dynamic between Yaz and Sammy in which they can have their own lives and friendships outside of each other Yaz has clearly forgiven Sammy at this point as we don’t see any kind of bitterness in their interactions at all and after the group makes their tree fort and they have some time to rest and relax away from the pressures of constantly running from dinosaurs I think Yaz really starts to

process her deeper feelings for Sammy, she wants to spend more time with Sammy and get even closer, we can see how eager she is to join Brooklyn and Sammy on their venture out into the jungle to locate the weird frozen flower patch that Brooklyn stumbled upon a while back, Yaz definitely strikes me as the type of person who has never been in love before so with everything else going on (and with her mind full of much stronger fears of losing the others in the group, especially Sammy, which I will talk about more later in this post series) her feelings are bound to manifest strongly We can see that Yaz is now actively playing that question game with Sammy, getting to know her better, and exchanging witty banter back and forth, obviously Yaz cares about all of the people in the group on some level or she wouldn’t have been so upset when they thought Ben died but notice how she is much more interested in talking to and learning about Sammy than she is in talking to and learning about Brooklyn, however she does try her best to loop Brooklyn into the conversation once Sammy cues her to Can we just take a second to appreciate the silent conversations that Yaz and Sammy have? I’m a sucker for some good non-verbal communication because it means that the characters are very close and feel connected with each other, there’s also the fact that since Yaz wants to be around her again Sammy spends so much time making physical contact with her, touch is clearly one of Sammy’s main love languages Yaz goes to help Sammy when the gun case falls on her only to be stopped by Tiff (who tries to prevent Yaz from running away to get help) and Sammy tackles Tiff to the ground to get her to let go of Yaz, honestly I know that Sammy realizes that Yaz getting free is their best chance of getting the help they need but I think it’s really telling that she went so hard, Yaz is clearly her favorite person on the island and Sammy isn’t about to let Tiff hurt her, I also find it really telling that when Yaz sees Sammy and Darius on the security camera monitors she looks relieved and excited and then we get a set of shots that imply she’s looking just at Sammy, this is followed by such a soft, warm, loving expression from Yaz that it melts my gay heart, and of course she’s incredibly concerned when she sees Tiff and Mitch approaching During their organized stampede, Yaz has to abandon the Jeep and, without hesitation, she leaps from the car into Sammy’s waiting arms, this is a mark of a great amount of character growth for Yaz because she not only trusts Sammy now but literally trusts her with her life, we also get an adorable moment when they are dismounting in which Sammy helps Yaz get down and holds both of her hands, when they all go in for a group hug we see Yaz place her hand on Sammy’s waist (as I mentioned in part 1 of this post series, that seems like an unusually place to put your hand on a friend and neither Sammy nor Yaz do that with anyone else in the group), when Sammy is listing her favorite people in the group as she and Kenji are hanging out in their gondola she mentions Yaz first while in Yaz's own gondola she is visibly longing to be over with Sammy (especially seeing how much fun Sammy and Kenji are having pushing on the sides of the gondola) instead of having to face Brooklyn and the fact that they are not close at all, just like when Sammy left Yaz with Kenji this feels almost like a deliberate move on Sammy’s part to get Yaz out of her comfort zone and forming closer bonds with the others (though I think it’s also an excuse for Sammy to spend some quality time with Kenji who definitely seems like he’s become a brother figure) We also get this moment a jealousy in which Yaz seems a little salty that Sammy is hanging out with Kenji (though on the surface it is about how they are messing around instead of helping, Yaz’s comment is definitely tinged with jealousy), this feels very much like the reaction of someone who has romantic feelings but doesn’t have the experience to properly interpret them and who has not been able to

talk about them or put a name to them, she clearly wants a closer relationship with Sammy but Yaz is unable to thoroughly define the relationship she wants which leaves her feeling like her needs aren’t being met in situations like this, in that sense she has fallen into a bit more of an insecure attachment again, she feels threatened by Sammy’s other friendships because she and Sammy haven’t differentiated their relationship from that of the friendships they have with the others I would just like to point out the lingering hug they share in which Yaz is clearly nuzzling Sammy’s neck and the fact that Yaz goes over to stand next to Sammy when she moves to hug Brooklyn, there’s no heterosexual explanation for that, or the way Yaz holds and comforts Sammy after pulling away from that dinosaur (if you look closely you can see Yaz rubbing Sammy’s arm with her thumb) And the scene where Yaz explains that Bumpy likes her so much because she keeps snacks in her pockets and then shares some of the snacks so Sammy can feed her too? Absolutely precious, we love to see Yaz being so soft with Sammy, like the way she calls out to her when part of the group goes to search Kenji’s dad’s penthouse for gas to put in the boat, or the way Yaz checks on Sammy while Ben’s siphoning gas from the limos in the penthouse’s garage, it’s clear here that Yaz also wants Sammy to be able to rely on her sometimes, to confide in her, Yaz doesn’t have time to respond in that moment because of yet another dinosaur attack (I also think that she was having a hard time responding because on some level Yaz is also afraid to go home) but the fact that she asked in the first place shows a lot of character and relationship growth, she even goes to check on Sammy later once they’re back on the boat, Sammy does the talking then and uses Yaz more as a sounding board but the gentle smile Yaz gives when Sammy walks away with the solution to her problem is absolutely priceless

#jwcc #yasammy #longpost

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masterthespianduchovny · 4 years ago

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Any Philes (or Gillovnies) who enjoyed seeing David and Gillian together on Sunday please ignore the antis.

Do not allow them to shame you for enjoying David and Gillian getting along. These antis have spent years shaming and harassing people for daring to believe that Davis and Gillian get along and are friends. They claim it’s all about shipping real people, but as I can attest to myself (which I have proof of), I was like sent almost 30 hate anon stemming from a post explaining why I believe David and Gillian are friends.

I explained why they may have not got along during certain points in the original run, but ultimately they got along and have become closer since then. Various examples were used to back up my assertion. Antis got so upset they sent, again, almost 30 hate anons. Only like three of them were neutral or in agreement with me.

This is legit not an exaggeration.

Gillian’s post yesterday blew their whole belief system apart. They claimed that Gillian didn’t like David and that she only associated with him for either the x files or to promote a charity. They said we were making up shit to say they get along and that Gillian was grossed out by him.

Again, this was because people said they were FRIENDS.

Then, yesterday happened and now it’s, 1. “I don’t know why people are losing their shit, David was visiting a friend.” Or, 2. “You guys are being weird about David visiting Gillian.” And, also, 3. “fans needs to quit that shipper shit, they’re ruining a good pic.” 4. “I hate that Gillian is friends with him, she doesn’t know the truth about him.”

Although I’m Gillovny as fuck, I was just happy to see they got along. I was vindicated after what antis tried to put me through and all the shit they put others through. Gillian’s post utterly destroyed their bullshit and claims of rationality/objectivity.

As far as the antis remarks about this visit:

1. They HAVE to admit that David and Gillian are friends because there’s no other way to explain David’s visit. As far as we know, there aren’t any plans for live action x files, they have no active projects to promote, and David is against appearing with Gillian in non x files projects.

So, if they aren’t friends and they aren’t working together, that’s means they’re fucking or dating, right? In this situation, friendship is the lesser evil and they’d be delusional to pretend they aren’t friends at this point.

But it’s not enough to acknowledge that they’re friends, they have to downplay it like it’s no big deal as if the narrative that they hate each other hasn’t been peddled since the fucking 90s.

I mean, what fan wouldn’t rejoice at the fact that two actors with mad chemistry actually get along?

However, antis have to downplay it just to subtly stress and imply that this is a friendship and nothing more. Just because we were right about this doesn’t mean some Gillovnies are right that there may be something more (even if it’s just emotionally), which the confirmed friendship now makes them believe we may be on to something.

2. Most weren’t being weird about David visiting Gillian. However, it’s a pretty big deal because they famously only took professional/work related photos together. How many personal pics have we seen of them. And they spent years talking about how they don’t really hang out and barely text/email each other. Why can’t we squee on the people we care about hanging out?

3. Most fans didn’t bring up Gillovny and, even if they did, it’s a part of life for them at this point. I’d argue that many of the fans who do bring it up are casual fans and don’t mean to be malicious. Most fans don’t keep up with their dating lives. Last year, I just found out that a phile thought David and Gillian were married because Tea and Gillian kinda look alike. Most don’t know Gillian’s dating history, that she and Peter broke up, or about the girlfriend that David hasn’t claimed despite being involved with her for years. Antis find reasons to be upset, and then blame it on excited fans or Gillovnies because they’re upset that we were right about something they swear wasn’t true.

4. Unless you actually had personal dealing with David or a trusted person you know was, a random fan on the internet will never know David more than Gillian. Whatever allegations y’all want to level at him during his x files days, she likely knows about. There aren’t many secrets in Hollywood, so if you know something and believe it, Gillian likely knows as well. No people don’t always know everything about a person, but people in Hollywood love to gossip. There’s no way Gillian could be friends with David and she somehow doesn’t know about the allegedly bad things he did.

Antis also love to lean on remarks given by Dean Hanglund (???), William b Davis, and pat skipper to prove David and Gillian hated each other. All while overlooking Kim Manners (who spoke on record about their connection), Mitch Pileggi, and other people who have said the opposite.

You have the Mark Mann photoshoot where Mark described the event from beginning to end and it was a glowing assessment of their dynamic, which antis claim was “PR.” You also have Jimmy Kimmel who initially observed how well they got along off camera, noticed it again on camera, remarked on it, and then flat out asked them, “what’s going on with you two?”

You have various celebrities, people who know or have come in contact with them, liking and commenting on shit regarding their relationship. I don’t mean this romantically just in general.

There is way more evidence supporting the fact that they got along and are friends (now) than this idea that they hate each other. I’m not saying they’ve never butted heads and fought, however, I think their relationship shouldn’t be defined by the moments they didn’t get along. These two worked long hour days together and became famous at the same time all while isolated in Vancouver together. Cut them some slack.

Keep in mind, their “dark days” came around the time where, in addition to long shooting days, they also shot a movie at the same time! Yeah, they didn’t get along at times before then, but they were some workhorses for Chris!

I do find Orlando Jones’ place in this hilarious and intriguing. We know for a fact that he worked with David and may even be friends with him. Also. he may have worked with Gillian or come into contact with her. They had roles on the same show, but didn’t share scenes together. The fact that he openly ships them is intriguing because of his proximity to them and he’s a professional actor. Orlando likes to have fun and can be trollish at times, but not maliciously.

The fact that he openly ships Gillovny and hasn’t been told to stop is fascinating. I don’t think he’s been told to stop because Orlando has good relationships in Hollywood and doesn’t seem the type of overstep boundaries. So either he’s having good fun with it and doesn’t believe it OR he wants something to happen and likes being involved in the fan shipping. And that tells me either David (and Gillian) don’t have a problem when he does it and/or he sees/hears things we haven’t and wishes they’d get together. 🤔

Ultimately, don’t listen to antis because they’re upset as fuck right now and most of us are just enjoying the content and having a good time. :) don’t let them think we’re doing anything wrong for loving the pics that were released for us to enjoy.

#gillian anderson #david duchovny #Gillovny #david and gillian #gillian and david

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s-serendipit-y · 4 years ago

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enfp s/o - kaito, kokichi, nagito, shuichi

@arson-frog-art asked: PLEASE DO KOKICHI NAGITO SHUICHI AND WHOEVER ELSE JUST PLEASE AT LEAST THOSE THREE WITH AN ENFP JANDNANBF

anonymous asked: could you do shuichi, kaito and nagito with an enfp s/o?

a/n: this was one of the hardest personalities i’ve written, hopefully you like it <3

——— kaito momota

you two were extremely alike

both of you were sociable

and you both wanted the best for your friends

also you both were very popular at school

so when you two go together nobody was surprised

you both were good communicators so you two rarely fought knowing that it was easy for you to talk it through

now when you two do fight, it was mostly due to you overthinking your abilities

kaito puts all his trust into you, not only that he believes you can do anything

so it makes him mad that you can’t believe in yourself

however for you, it’s nice that your boyfriend believes in you but he expects so much from you that it puts stress onto you which negatively affects your emotions

kaito also loves how curious you can be

you both want to go out and experience things instead of sitting around all day

kaito would say he’s gonna go to space with you by his side

so if you have a interest in space, that’s great! you and kaito can relate on that too

if you don’t, it’s alright, but make sure you let him know that you support him no matter what

because he’ll do the same for you

also you both are very affectionate in the relationship

you two had no problems showing pda

hand holding, hugging, even kissing

kaito likes showing you off

now since you tend to get along with everyone you talk to

you and kokichi get along

and kaito doesn’t understand how you can stand being around him

“s/o all he does is lie”

but you try to tell him he means no harm

now kaito trusts you but he doesn’t trust kokichi

but you do make sure that kokichi doesn’t play pranks on kaito

and even though he doesn’t know that, if he did, he would be grateful

——— kokichi ouma

you and kokichi were- pretty different

you were known for being very friendly at school, which made you pretty popular

not only that you could match anyone’s energy and you loved talking to everyone

that’s when kokichi finally took notice of you

you approached him hoping for a conversation but kokichi being kokichi. made that almost impossible

he knew when people were putting on a facade and he wanted to expose them for who they truly are

and his target was you

as you two became closer, kokichi realized that this personality of your was true

which made it easier for him to trust you

then not long after you and kokichi began to date

he enjoyed how observant you were

you could read someone’s face and know their emotions no matter how hard they tried to conceal them

this helped when he and d.i.c.e would prank people but he hated when you used it on him

kokichi is known for lying to cover up how he truly feels, sometimes even crying to sell his agenda even more

yet you could almost always see through it

even if he tried to push you away he knew you could see he truly wanted your comfort

you were really breaking his character s/o

on another note, you tend to be over emotional especially when under stress or overwhelmed

so kokichi never play pranks on you

he doesn’t want you to burst out in tears, anger, or even just shut down emotionally for hours

he does love you and he hates seeing you anything but happy

and it makes him feel horrible, which he hates

your independence is good for him too

at the beginning of your relationship, he’s extremely clingy but after a while he would need his space

and knowing that you do too makes him feel better

there would be times when you guys don’t talk for hours

then other times when you two would be all over each other showing as much affection that you both could desire

you and kokichi are both extroverts, it was easy for both of you to talk to people

however there are times that when you interact with people that makes him jealous

especially kaito

it’s obvious that kaito doesn’t like him but he has no problem with you

but seeing you two be close makes him feel bitter

but if you reassure him that you have no type of romantic feelings for kaito he’ll believe you

but he’ll always annoy kaito for being close to you.

——— nagito komaeda

he just doesn’t understand

out of all the students at hopes peak you want to be with him

why?

you were popular at school but even then you chose him

maybe it was his luck, he didn’t know

you being emotional was no feat for nagito

he wasn’t exactly the most expressive person but he was great at reading people

if he sees you being overwhelmed or stressed, he would be quick to step in and help out

if people we’re trying to criticize things you do he would be quick to turn it onto himself

which you also don’t like but he’s trying

not only that, but when you overthink things he would try to reassure you

“who wouldn’t like you s/o? you’re shimmering with hope”

yet when you try to do the same for him he would try to brush you off but you don’t give up easily

you were just as observant as him after all

if it’s during the killing game, your communicating skills helped nagito a lot

when kazuichi or anyone else try to tie him up

or when akane tries to beat “sense into him”

you were there to make sure it didn’t happen

you were able to convince them not to do anything either by persuasion or promising to keep him “under control”

anyways- your enthusiasm fills him with hope

whenever you find something new or have a new idea your excited to share it with anyone

he really loves it when it has to do with your talent

watching first hand to see his precious s/o improve their talent to overcome despair

he absolutely loves it

——— shuichi saihara

you being a extrovert alone meade you and shuichi different

you were like kaito and kaede, always trying to help him trust his detective skills or improve his social skills

it just seemed like he just attracted sociable people to him

however unlike his friends, you know how to relax and often make shuichi relax with you

during the killing game everyone is depending on him which puts a lot of stress on him

he doesn’t want anyone else to die but he also doesn’t want to kill everyone for being a bad detective

you two would just lay together or find something to do during your free time

but then you back to being your normal loud self that shuichi had grown to love

also shuichi admires how observant you are

he’s not good at verbally expressing himself

and there are times when he can get easily annoyed

so knowing that you could read his face and be there for him was reassuring

and he could do the same for you

despite how he feels, he is the ultimate detective so he could tell when you were feeling down

sometimes he would pull you into a hug doing his best to reassure you

or he would remove you from whatever is making you feel down or take it off your mind

shuichi doubts himself a lot but he doesn’t doubt his love for you

even though your personalities are different shuichi can relate to certain quirks you have

#danganronpa imagines #danganronpa x reader #danganronpa headcanons #v3 x reader #dr2 x reader

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lalahbug · 4 years ago

Text

Guidance - Zuko x Reader Chapter 3

Fandom: Avatar the Last Airbender Word Count: 4,140

My Masterlist

Warnings/disclaim: General Author’s Note: under story ___ is a blank for your name/oc/whatever you prefer Written in 3rd person Line/header is to separate paragraphs to indicate time skips, as Tumblr hates my formatting.

Story under cut, 3 of 8, Guidance Masterlist

___ and Zuko had stayed and helped everyone in the village for about two weeks. The Long’s seemed like they’d be okay without any more outside help with Reo being grown. Fay had an infection that ___ was able to heal. But today was their last day, as ___ went to say her farewells to everyone, letting them know she may not be coming back, moving to another area. The farewells were long and sorrowful for the villagers, but ___’s smile never

While the time there was full of learning and hard work, Zuko couldn’t be more pleased with his progress in being helpful to his girlfriend. He even earned the pendant from Himari, which was safely hidden in his backpack, identical to ___’s. They got money and supplies for both of them to be on the road for a while. Even sold Gray to the Long’s to ensure they wouldn’t need to worry about the feed. As permanent goodbyes wrapped up, Zuko took ___’s hand and started to walk beneath the afternoon sun. After walking for a while, Zuko could feel the earth vibrating beneath him, and from the glance, he stole at ___’s face, he could tell she felt the same movements. She pulled him into nearby bushes before looking up at the sky with a shocked expression. Zuko followed her eyesight to see the Avatar’s bison falling out of the sky before crashing to the ground, all the happiness he’d felt for the past few weeks was muted as he glared at the group of kids in front of him. The squeeze on his hand brought him out of his stupor. He glared at her for a moment before seeing the confusion and worry in her eyes, dropping his own to the ground. ___ pulled him a little further away from the gang as the girls started to fight. Before whispering to him. “The ground is still trembling, whatever it is, it’s not an animal. It’s likely a machine, do you have any idea what it could be?” Zuko thought for a moment thinking of the weapons of war at the Fire Nations disposal. What would they send after the Avatar now that Zhao was gone? “Azula.” “Okay. So, your sister is behind this but I doubt she’s the machine. But it’s likely a Fire Nation vehicle of some sort. We should lie low and wait to figure out our next move.“ “What do you mean wait and figure it out? There’s my chance of getting back home.” He gestured to the Avatar. The anger and pain that stroked across ___’s face alone almost sent him reeling. She pressed her fingertips to her temples rubbing them exhaling angrily. “I could go home; we could live in peace and luxury.” Zuko pleaded with her now. “What peace?” She spat. “Your peace of home meaning the suffering and deaths of more innocent people, especially if the Avatar is gone or locked up or whatever you plan to do if you happen to catch him.” “Me going home and earning my honor and the throne back means one day, I could end the war and release the Avatar too.” ___ stood up fuming at his selfishness and ignorance. She closed her eyes tightly trying to not explode at her love. She knew he still didn’t know who he was, he still felt the need to prove himself to his toxic family. “Please, ___. Come with me, don’t leave me.” His second plea broke her heart and tears started to fall. “This is wrong Zuko.” She cried softly before cupping his torn expression in her hands. “But I’m here, to love and guide you, just please,” she begged. “Promise me, Aang doesn’t die, and try to surprise me with the goodness I know is within you.” Zuko hugged her tightly. It felt so right and wrong to be able to keep his understanding girlfriend in his corner no matter what. But he didn’t have the strength to leave her behind and be alone again. “I promise.”

They followed after Azula on her mongoose-lizard, Zuko wanted to ignore the small glances his love kept giving him, but a sense of worry she had made him not say anything. Reaching a small abandoned town, Azula and Aang were talking. ___ took off her backpack and stretched her arms. “What are you doing?” Zuko questioned while discarding his bag and putting it next to hers. “Making sure my shoulders aren’t stiff, we’re about to fight, it’ll be better if I’m limber.” “No,” Zuko hissed, putting his hands on her shoulders. “This is my fight; I just need you here emotionally. I know you can protect yourself and you’re an amazing fighter. But Azula can shoot lighting, and the moment she realizes that you’re with me, she would use you against me in no more than a blink of an eye.” ___ glared at the dirt, knowing what he said was true. “Fine, but if I think you or Aang needs help, I will be there. This may be your fight but I won’t allow either of you to die.” Zuko knew that was the only way he’d get her to stay put and decided to not argue her stipulation. “Okay,” he agreed before kissing her gently. “Stay here as long as you can.” She nodded and with that Zuko ran off towards the brewing battle. Hiding between two old buildings, ___ watched them fight. Zuko was right about one thing. The only thing he truly knows is fighting and he fought with bewitching smoothness. She could barely look away. But she had to, to keep an eye on Aang as well. She was getting tense as the fight went on, when Zuko fell on his back, she was about to rush over when she saw Iroh and the rest of the Avatar’s friends show up. She knelt, watching intently, closer to the opening of the alley, unknowingly inching out again and again. But her twitching feet moved towards the group quickly as Azula struck Iroh with lighting. Rushing to his side she quickly started to try and heal Iroh, the explosion behind her barely registered in her mind as she focused on the glow. ___ glanced at Zuko as he kneeled next to her, the distressed look he had was twisting his face. Katara tried to speak but he lashed fire at them telling them to leave. After a few more tries at healing Iroh, she let her hands drop. “I’m sorry I can’t do better,” she whispered to Zuko. “I’m just an average healer.” He didn’t reply, he just focused on Iroh’s face which seemed to relax a bit. She patted Zuko’s shoulder tenderly before getting together materials around them to shape a gurney to carry Iroh.

The next morning Iroh awoke and Zuko explained what happened, but ___ was asleep in the corner exhausted from healing, cleaning, and cooking. While Zuko watched over Iroh. “Who is this?” Iroh gestured to the sleeping figure in the corner, with a gentle smile. “Oh, um,” Zuko blushed softly. “That’s ___, she healed you a bit before helping me carry you here. She’s my girlfriend.” “She’s a waterbender? From the North Pole?” Zuko nodded. “Why isn’t she home, safe from the war?” Zuko took a deep breath before explaining her story and including her trip to the spirit world. “She must feel conflicted being with a man who believes he needs to capture the Avatar.” “Yes, but somehow, she loves me and supports me nonetheless. She just asked me to promise that Aang doesn’t die. And that I surprise her with the good she knows I have. She seems to know something about, that she isn’t sharing. Like she knows the cause of my internal conflict.” “Hmm, she is wise and has been through a deal herself. It would be unwise of you to doubt statements that come from her.” Iroh eyed her for a moment, silently thanking her for being there for Zuko. “She looks exhausted, you should lie her down properly. Sitting up to sleep isn’t very restful.” Zuko nodded and got up to lay down a blanket on the ground before laying her down carefully. He stared at her rested features for a while, something he’d grown to love doing and accustomed to. “What is that delicious smell?” Iroh chimed. “___ made some soup and prepared some tea, before passing out. Would you like to try both?” “Of course!” Zuko stroked ___’s cheek gently before standing up and getting some soup and tea for himself and his uncle.

___ hummed softly to herself, trying to wake up, but the comfort of sleep tried to lull her. Huffing out softly she forced her eyes open and sat up, to find she was alone. Curling up softly from her makeshift bed. “Zuko must have laid me down,” she whispered with a smile playing on her lips. Stretching and getting up, she headed outside to find her love. Only to see him and his uncle doing movements like waterbenders. She raised an eyebrow at it before turning to make tea for all of them.

A few weeks had passed and they were now in Misty Palms Oasis. Zuko was waiting for his uncle to come out of a room, leaning against some wall. ___ was softly sketching some of the flowers in the room before glancing over at Zuko, noticing he looked more sullen than usual. “Babe?” She called out softly. “You okay?” “I’m fine, just bored of waiting,” he huffed. She walked over and stood in front of him. “Are you a bit upset because it’s members-only?” He huffed softly, not giving her a yes or no, but a soft smile spread across her lips, and he knew she’d figured it out. She pulled his arms free from the cross they’d been in. Pulling him into her arms and resting her head on his shoulder. He sighed before wrapping his arms around her securely. “You know me too well.” “I just pay attention. If you want, we can hug for a while.” He cleared his throat, “um actually…” he trailed off. She pulled back a bit to see a faint flush on his cheeks. “Oh, sorry did I make you uncomfortable?” “What? No, no. I actually would like to sit down, with you, in my lap.” He mumbled the last words. ___ heard him clearly though and stepped back so he could position himself on the floor. She debated mentally how to sit in his lap without making him nervous. Zuko sighed a bit, seeing her apprehension, and grabbed her hand to tug her down to him. He didn’t say anything but kept adjusting her until she was sideways with her shoulder to his chest and legs spilling over the side of his thigh. Pulling her into another embrace, she rested her head on his shoulder. “We were sitting like this, sort of, while riding Gray, when we became boyfriend and girlfriend.” “Maybe that’s why I wanted to hold you like this. It brings back good feelings.” “The main difference is now; we both know that we love each other.” “I still don’t know why you love me,” Zuko mumbled. She sighed softly, “it’s been hard for me to explain, I keep telling you that. But I have been thinking about it and I think I might have it now.” Clearing her throat, a bit before cuddling into him more. Drawing light circles on his chest with her fingers. “You accept me for me. I don’t have to hide. You let me be myself, no matter how sassy or hard-headed I am. It feels amazing to be loved by you. And I see how you’ve had to fight to learn and succeed, but you never give up. I believe in you so much, because I know whatever comes at you, you won’t give up. You’re smart and thorough. And I just have this wonderful feeling when I’m with you. I feel at peace, without even meditating. Like I can just trust you, I could lie my life in your hands, and know you’d do everything to keep me because you actually want me as I am.” Zuko’s heart was hammering, he’d been wanting this answer for so long, and now that he had it, he was grateful and speechless. He could feel himself tremble with the passion and love she confessed to him. He pushed her up a bit before pressing his lips to her forehead tenderly before invading her lips and mouth. Earning a softly moan from her, his hand traveled up to the back of her neck. Tilting her head back and deepening the kiss, she pulled back softly with a pant. “I love you, ___.” “I love you, too.” While staring into each other’s eyes the door to the room Iroh was in opened, causing both of them to jump and sort themselves into an upright position. “Sorry to interrupt your moment but we’re ready to go.” Iroh chuckled at the young adults’ flushed cheek. "Everything is taken care of,” stated Iroh’s friend. "Where are we going?” ___ asked. “We’re heading to Ba Sing Se!” “Ba Sing Se? Why would we go to the Earth Kingdom capital?” Zuko demanded. “The city is full of refugees. No one will notice 3 more.” The friend chimed. "We can hide in plain sight,“ Iroh said with hope. “I’ve got my passport; I’d just need to buy a ticket. But what about both of you?” “Don’t worry about it, my dear. Our good friends have provided us with 3 passports and tickets. Mushi, Lee Jr, and ___. My dear nephew and his wife. I didn’t know your last name so I gave us all the same one.” Iroh laughed as Zuko started to blush at the word wife. Iroh knew of Zuko’s small secret, the engagement pendant he had, and kept hidden at all costs from ___. “Uncle, you can’t just expect us to act married!” “You’re already dating, just be more open about it. It’ll be fine!” Iroh smiled lovingly at the two, as Zuko just burned more. “I don’t think it’s a big deal. If anyone we don’t know ask, we’ll just say we’re together, no reason to give them a label. I doubt anyone will care about our last names or status, other than employers, maybe. We’ll be safe, that’s what matters.” Her complete disregard of the situation as she calmly picked up their bags, dumbfounded Zuko while Iroh chuckled at the sight.

Walking through the streets of Ba Sing Se, while Iroh held a potted plant which Zuko was giving an annoyed glare. “We have a lady with us, we should spruce up our place!” “Iroh, that’s so sweet of you, but you don’t need to spend money for my sake. Let’s just settle and do our best.” “I don’t want to make a life here.” Zuko spat. “Life happens wherever you are, whether you make it or not!” Iroh chided. ___ grabbed Zuko’s hand and entwined their fingers. “Hey, at least we’re all together and we’re safe. Right?” Zuko stopped his moping for a moment before smiling at her softly. “Right.”

A week or so had passed while the three of them worked diligently at the tea shop Iroh got them jobs at. Zuko had been less expressive in his emotions other than anger, ___ tried talking to him, but he wouldn’t open up. Zuko was working in the back with his uncle while ___ waited on tables and brought back orders for them. “Another jasmine tea, please!” She called out before placing a note on the counter with the order and table number. Iroh chuckled as she seemed to be enjoying herself. “She really loves to help and serve; I find it admiral.” Iroh placed a previous order of tea on the counter with the corresponding note. “Lee, I don’t mean to pry. But it feels as though you’ve been avoiding her lately. Even though she doesn’t bother you or voice her worry anymore. It’s very easy to see under the façade she’s using in public.” Zuko huffed and glanced up at ___ who was talking with customers and taking orders. She looked happy without him. “I can’t place how I’m feeling, but when I see her like this, it makes me angrier.” Iroh looked over at ___, although she seemed happy if one paid attention along enough. They would see the way she shot glances of wariness at Zuko and the soft sigh she’d exhale on the way up to the counter. “I think if you watched her, the way she watches you, that anger might dissipate,” Iroh whispered to Zuko as she approached them. “It’s so busy. I blame you, Mushi,” she expressed with a fake sigh but a small smile followed afterward. “Doing what I love and giving great tea to others is not something I’ll apologize for!” Iroh smiled back at the young woman. “Babe?” ___ called out to Zuko. “What?” he looked up from his task to meet her worried eyes. “Are you okay? Do you need to take a break? We could take one together.” Offered with a smile, making him look back down at his task. “I don’t need a break, I’m fine.” “My offer still stands, let me know if you change your mind.” Iroh’s heart pinched at the fretful look she gave Zuko before glancing at Iroh, asking with her eyes to watch out for Zuko. Iroh nodded and she left with a fulfilled order. “Lee, look.” Iroh gestured with his chin at ___. Zuko looked up just in time to see ___ looking at him with heartfelt concern. The look melted his heart as their eyes met and then she blew a kiss at him with a wink before returning to work. “She loves you and your apprehensive mood has made her worried. She’s always stealing glances at you. Whatever anger you have, I hope this knowledge helps you.” Zuko kept his eyes on his love, “it does. Thank you, Uncle.” “I believe the anger you felt, was jealousy. I think a date night would be beneficial to both of you. I will be out late tonight. I’ll be paying Pai Sho with some nice fellows in town.” Zuko nodded, before taking his eyes off of ___. “What should I do for a date night?” Iroh chuckled at the anxious look his nephew gave him. Before starting a plan for the couple.

“Goodnight you two. I’ll be home late.” Iroh waved at them. “Be safe!” ___ called out after him, she turned to Zuko with his favorite smile. "Would you like to head home? I can make some congee and some hot chocolate.” "No,“ he blushed before moving the picnic basket out in front of him. "I thought we could go out too, do a small date.” The look of shock and blush that ran through her cheeks gave him more courage, he offered an arm to her. "Shall we?“ He gave her a soft smile as she took his arm and they started walking.

Upon a small hill, the couple smoothed out a blanket to sit on along with the contents of the basket. Some iced tea and appetizing sandwiches along with some snacks. They sat down together, closely, leaning against each other. ___ watched the lights of the city and would occasionally look up to the stars then towards the bush line. "You seem,” he trailed off a bit. “Distracted.” "I’m just enjoying your company while we eat and I look around. I haven’t been to this spot before.“ She sat up a bit to get a drink before settling against Zuko again. "I’m sorry I’ve been so distant lately. I guess I was jealous, seeing you be happy with customers, without me, like you don’t need me.” "I don’t need you, but I want you more than anything. We should live and grow together, be able to be dependent on one another when needed. But I don’t want either of us to be codependent, as that’s not healthy for a relationship if it goes on too long.“ "So, you love and want me, but don’t need me?” He furrowed his brow not really understanding. "I do need you, but as emotional support. I want us to love another without losing who we are in the process. If life and time allow, I would want nothing more than to be able to be close to you, hold your hand, as we both live out the rest of our existence.“ Zuko hummed a bit in reply understanding a bit more, she wants him forever but still wants to be independent too. "So best friends for life with the emotional bond of love and passion. My lover, my best friend, my forever.” She leaned up and kissed his cheek gently. “I love you, Zuko.” His heart was hammering the moment she said, lover. She’d never called him that before. Although they’ve only been passionate a few times and never made love, she still saw him as her lover. "How can I be your lover when we haven’t been intimate?“ "I don’t know about you, but I don’t see myself ever being with another person. No matter if we ever have intercourse or not, it honestly doesn’t matter to me.” "You don’t care to have me, sexually?“ He whispered; he felt a bit hurt. "Not at the risk of making you uncomfortable or making a mistake.” She whispered back; he could hear the anguish in her tone. "You still worry about that?“ "My last relationship was only physical, I have impulses sometimes, and I can’t let them ruin this, I love you too much. I can’t lose you because I fucked up. I just can’t.” She whispered before kissing his cheek softly. “So I’ll wait forever if I have to.” "So, you put all the pressure of making first moves on me?“ "No, if you say you want me to do something, I’ll do it. I just don’t want to assume anything or push you too soon.” Her words hung in the air. Zuko didn’t suspect that answer and he didn’t know what he wanted. How could he know what he wanted if he’s never experienced it before? "There is one thing I want.“ He wrapped an arm around bringing her as close as possible. She leaned against him fondly. "Name it.” Zuko’s confidence plummeted as her voice rang in his ears. “Uh, well, I can’t name it, it’s more of a question or um I have some to ask you.” He stuttered over his words and a heavy blush covered his face and he moved away from her a bit before facing her more directly. "Zuko?“ She questioned as he fumbled onto one knee tapping his pockets before quickly presenting the pendant, he’d kept from her. For what seemed like forever. ___’s eyes went wide, she knew this necklace and she could already feel herself tearing up. She kept glancing between the necklace and Zuko’s golden eyes as he held it delicately in his hand. "Will you be mine? Or um, will you marry me, someday?” Zuko watched her as she situated herself onto her knees and gently brushed her fingertips over it. She closed his hand into a fist and held his wrist. She finally met his eyes; he could only see her tears before she rested her forehead against his closed fist. "I’m not good enough for you.“ She sobbed softly. "You’re trying to do things right; I would be all of your first and all of your last. But I can’t offer that back to you.” Zuko smiled softly as the love and sorrow rolled off her. "I’m not good enough for you. I’ve done some really bad things in my life. If you’re willing to accept me. I would be honored to be all of your last.“ He brought her head up gently with his fingers under her chin. When their eyes found one another, he opened his fist again. "Will you accept me?” He asked softly and she sobbed before tightly wrapping her arms around his neck. Embracing each other. She finally whispered a yes before kissing him deeply then rested the top of her head onto his chest. Zuko was trembling as he moved her hair out of the way and fastened the necklace around her neck. Once he was done, she sat back, the tears had stopped. But she glowed with happiness as the tears still glistened in her waterline. Under a crescent moon, he couldn’t help but smile at her. And never before this night had he noticed how barren her neck looked without his necklace resting tenderly on her skin.

Author’s Note: After this chapter, smut, drama, angst all starts. So this is the fluff you get for now to cushion the ride to come. If you’re uncomfortable with smut, angst, cock warming kinks, this might a good place for you to stop and just let the happiness and fluff be.

#fanfic #fanficition #avatar the last airbender #atla #zuko x reader #zuko/reader #zuko fanfic #zuko fic #atla fic #lalahbug #lalah writes #guidance series #reader insert #xreader #self insert #fire lord zuko #firelord zuko

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the-sunshine-dims · 4 years ago

Text

Amnesia rewrite!

i remember how much i loved writing the amnesia series and once i realized i was coming up on my 100th fic i realized what fic would be better to my 100th then an amnesia rewrite!

ch 2 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5 | ch 6 | ch 7

original fic

words: 1,411

ao3

contents and warning: blood, blood loss, injury, angst, hurt/comfort, roman helps, amnesia, hurt janus, grieving, crying,

summary: Janus got hurt and cant remember anything up to a certain point, which means he doesn't remember the split of creativity, or their names getting revealed, and a lot else, and during Janus having amnesia there's a lot of healing, and not only from him.

or Janus somehow stumbled into the imagination, got amnesia, and now there's angst and hurt/comfort, maybe even fluff

____

Janus stumbled out of the foresty wilderness-clad imagination, not remembering much, and not remembering just how much he’d forgotten, not even remembering how he had ended up in imagination, he did remember a couple things, even if they were a couple of the simpler things, such as, he was Thomas’s “deceitful” trait, he was also Thomas’s “self preservation” though that was just a fancy word for Janus protected thomas.

and another thing he knew was that the blood splatter that had gotten in his hair and was soaking through his shirt was very not good.

But some things he didn’t know were possibly some of the most important things, such as the painful split of king creativity, and the painful memories of being locked away with the label of “darksides” and “snake tricking thomas into sinning”, and everyone telling thomas their names.

But, currently it didn’t matter what he remembered, he had to clean himself up and figure out if all of the blood was his ..or someone else’s, or both, and he had to figure out if it was better if it was his or someone else’s.

He tried his best to take a deep breath, hoping it would help the painful headache he had go away, but it just came out shaky and it helped none, so with nothing else to do he just tried his best to get back to his room, after getting a quarter way to where he thought it would be he had to begin leaning on the wall, feeling faint, before trying his best to continue.

But when he reached the first open room he’s seen he didn’t recognize it, maybe morality just got bored and redecorated? He didn’t know.

Once he enters, for a minute all he wants is to stay there, it’s warm, and just bright enough to be the perfect place to take a nap, like Thomas’s grandma's living room, with the big windows facing the couch, just so comfortable of an atmosphere, he shakes his head at himself ignoring the immediate flare of pain it causes, he needs to get to his room, then he can wash up and take a nap, he just needs to wait to find his room.

He sighs about to try and leave and hope to not get more lost,

Then he saw them.

A side, a side he’s never seen before, sitting on one of the armchairs and staring at him like with a vigilante- almost annoyed gaze

They were a taller side, outfit almost like a prince, with a bright red sash, maybe they were a new side? Maybe something to do with inspiration? Or something else creative? That would explain the similarities to creativity, Regardless though even if they weren't something to do with creative stuff janus was sure creativity would like them, creativity liked everyone.

And while Janus was partially confused because he was having a kinda hard time processing he still was about to go make a move to greet the new side.

That was until the side snapped out “deceit.” Sounding annoyed. Making his blood go cold, and his eyes widened and everything in him filled with self preservation in a single moment because how did he know his trait this was a new side how did he know.

Suddenly the blood that’s made his already dark clothes darker and long since dried on his hair is overly noticeable now and he feels like he should flee as his gaze flicks across the entire room in an instant looking for possible exits.

He took a unnoticeable steadying breath before going “who- who are you?” He asks, almost hissing under his breath at just how shaky it was, he’s supposed to be strong to protect Thomas! Not shaky just because someone he didn’t know, knew something as simple as one of his traits.

The side seemed startled by the question, several unnamed emotions flitting across his face in a couple moments before it settled on base level confusion as Janus began looking around the room again, nervousness evolving slightly when he realized nothing was the same, the couch was moved along with the coffee table and the everything else he didn’t even think the framed photos were in the same place-

Then he saw a particular photo, it had morality, logic, anxiety (though he’s changed a lot), and this side.

Then he looked at the other photos and he noticed a particular lack of someone.

Creativity

and the more he looked there wasn’t any trace of him, no left out art supplies, no hand-crafted pillows, nothing.

He snapped his head back to this side and desperately asked “where’s creativity?” He really hoped that the sides were just pulling a mean and really badly timed prank.

This side is slowly destroying that hope when he looks absolutely startled by that and instead of- well anything, he just confusedly goes “..I’m creativity?”

Janus’s hands begin shaking aggressively after he’s processed the information, and suddenly he felt really overwhelmed “no- no no that’s not possible! You- you’re not creativity! He’s tall and he- he always has this big goofy grin! He- and he has this cape he made himself though it’s pretty much just a blanket wrapped around his shoulders!-“ tears had been spilling from his eyes as he went on, beginning to hold his shaky form with his shaky arms, and beginning to retract into himself “and- and he has fake roses on hand at all time despite- despite him knowing they get caught in his shirt everytime- and- he's not gone! I was just here and he and logic were trying to build a puzzle! He-“ he hiccuped “he was just here..” he sobbed, not meeting this ‘creativity’’s eyes and just staring at the floor instead though he couldn't see anything beyond vague shapes.

There was a long uncomfortable silence as Janus tried to breathe before the person spoke “creativity.. was split into me and my brother.. don’t you remember?”

Janus looked up at him and just shook his head sorrowfully before taking a big breath and trying his best to speak though it just came out as a quiet “no..” so quiet Roman almost didn’t hear it.

Janus wanted to go home.

He looked at the floor again, trying his hardest to avoid eye contact and not cry.. again.

That was until he felt a small tug on his shirt sleeve and the side was looking at him so concerned and he didn’t say anything but he backed away just a tiny bit and opened up his arms in a clear invitation, one which Janus immediately took up, catapulting himself into his arms and just.. sobbing.

Roman tried, if somewhat stiffly to comfort him, using his spare arm that wasn't wrapped around Janus to try and brush through Janus’s hair, that was what patton did when they were upset.

Or that was the plan, instead he felt a weird dry patch in Janus’s hair and when he looked closer it was dark red, he froze, knowing that the only real option for what it was was dried blood since he didn’t suppose Janus was the type to randomly dye his hair red and decide not too, a quarter way through, so he took a breath before beginning to speak “okay, umm, you're kinda bleeding, and I don’t think I would know how to care for whatever injury caused the bleeding properly so.. I think it would be best to go to Logan.”

Janus seemed half conscious because he just slowly blinked, trying to see if he somehow knew the name somehow, and after a minute Roman realized Janus didn't recognize the name so he explained “Logic, not long ago with the rest of us, shared his name with us, which is Logan,” he told him, and deciding it might be good to tell him more he just slowly went “you did too, you told us your name was Janus.”

Janus hummed, taking the information and processing it slowly, his fatigue and exhaustion finally affecting him, eventually he nodded to himself and with that Roman decided Janus wouldn’t be physically or emotionally fit to walk with him to Logan's room safely. so he carefully and slowly picked Janus up, half expecting some fight but instead Janus just practically curled up against his chest, his head beginning to loll in in a single moment.

And then Roman was off to Logan's Room.

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darkpoisonouslove · 4 years ago

Note

Can I give you a lot of work and ask you to answer all the questions in the otp question meme for Griffin x Faragonda, please? (I like them too much, and there's a lack of content about them...)

I love them, too, and I totally get the disappointment of having so little content about them. I feel it myself.

These are all set after season 1 in what is decidedly not an AU but canon keeps refusing to confirm.

1. Who is the most affectionate?

Faragonda has always been more touchy-feely but Griffin is completely on board with it. They’ve been apart long enough. She can more than use all of the clinginess.

2. Big spoon/Little spoon?

They switch but Faragonda is the big spoon more often. She loves giving Griffin all the affection. And Griffin melts in her arms.

3. Most common argument?

Where the line lies for witch pranks at official events. They really do not share the same view on that and the dissonance arises quite often. Not their most heated argument by a far cry but certainly the most common one.

4. Favorite non-sexual activity?

Having a tea party and just getting to talk to each other while they’re relaxing. It is the best stress relief to just sit together and chat about anything and everything.

5. Who is most likely to carry the other?

Faragonda. She totally sees it as yet another opportunity to be affectionate. Griffin is more surprised than Faragonda thought she’d be and she also seems more touched. That might have made Faragonda repeat it. Griffin is starting to feel spoiled.

6. What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

Griffin’s is Faragonda’s eyes. She loves the contrast of their dark color that reminds a lot of a cloudy sky and how soothing they are to her. Just a look in Faragonda’s eyes lets her know that she’s home.

Faragonda loves all of Griffin but she especially loves running her fingers through Griffin’s hair. Or brushing it. Or braiding it. It’s super soft and just the lightest touch can send Griffin shivering which is Faragonda’s favorite part. She loves how responsive Griffin is to touches of her hair.

7. What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Griffin starts getting jealous which is definitely new at least in a romantic context. She’s seen Faragonda date before and even encouraged it but now it is unbearable to even think about it.

Faragonda is more subtle about it. It’s her body language that changes - lingering gazes and touches. Maybe a couple remarks that are more suggestive. She’s careful not to push them back into not talking to each other, though.

8. Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate?

They don’t have nicknames for the other. They might just love saying the other’s name too much for that.

9. Who worries the most?

Both of them worry enough about each other’s well-being and the general state of things with the world at large - considering what they’ve lived to see - but Griffin actually worries a little more. Since she was the one who sort of initiated the rifts between them the previous times, she is worried about what might happen next and whether she won’t be stupid enough to let them get torn apart again. Faragonda has to reassure her that they will be fine and they will come out of anything together just like they always have.

10. Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

Faragonda. She thinks it’s the least she can do when she drags Griffin out to a restaurant when Griffin would prefer to stay home even if she will be the one to cook in that case. Griffin also remembers what Faragonda orders, however, and then makes it for her at home.

11. Who tops?

They switch but Faragonda tops more often. Griffin totally loves leaving her in charge, especially since Faragonda makes her feel like the most loved person in the world.

12. Who initiates kisses?

Griffin does. Faragonda is not shy at all, especially with Griffin but she actually likes it when Griffin initiates the kiss and directs it.

13. Who reaches for the other’s hand first?

Faragonda. Again, she is more about touching but once they’re holding hands, Griffin won’t let go of her.

14. Who kisses the hardest?

Griffin. She kisses like there’s no tomorrow and leaves Faragonda totally breathless but she’s not complaining.

15. Who wakes up first?

Griffin does most of the time. It is hard even for Faragonda to beat her to it when Griffin seems to have endless energy even if Faragonda is the one with the sunshine personality. Griffin claims that is exactly why Faragonda needs more time to recharge - she is spreading too much of her positivity around and it uses up her energy.

16. Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Both of them. They have actually been late for work because they didn’t want to leave the bed and each other’s company.

17. Who says I love you first?

Griffin. Faragonda actually wants to take things at Griffin’s pace and not rush them into something they’re not ready for that could tear them apart.

18. Who leaves little notes in the other’s one lunch? (Bonus: what does it usually say?)

Faragonda does. Griffin is a little surprised by how Faragonda managed to sneak them in there without her noticing since she was the one who prepared the food. She knows the fairy has her ways, though, especially since Griffin is often distracted by her presence. And it makes her day so who is she to complain, really?

19. Who tells their family/friends about their relationship first?

They don’t really say anything but Griselda figures it out a couple months before Ediltrude and Zarathustra do. Saladin, on the other hands, only learns from the twins a long way down the line and is pretty salty that they didn’t tell him sooner.

20. What do their family/friends think of their relationship?

They are all ecstatic that it is finally happening because they all know how much Griffin and Faragonda have always meant to each other and how much not speaking had affected them. Seeing them finally taking the chance and making each other happy makes their friends happy, too.

21. Who is more likely to start dancing with the other?

Faragonda totally drags Griffin into dancing whenever she feels like it. Griffin only complains about it a little. Just for the sake of it. She actually loves slow dancing with Faragonda but she has to be dramatic. It’s good for the soul.

22. Who cooks more/who is better at cooking?

Griffin is the better cook and she cooks almost always unless she is dead tired in which case Faragonda might take the risk and try her hand at making dinner. She isn’t actually that bad at cooking but she feels her meals can never live up to Griffin’s even if Griffin claims they’re really good.

23. Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines?

Griffin. Faragonda has expressed profound shock over her never ending arsenal of those but Griffin keeps delivering.

24. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear during inappropriate times?

Griffin, most of the time. She is a witch; she has a reputation to uphold. And it is pretty fun (and hot) to see Faragonda get flustered. Except, Faragonda retaliates sometimes and it is Griffin that ends up flustered. But she has to face the consequences for her actions and Faragonda makes up for it anyway. ;)

25. Who needs more assurance?

Griffin. She has some guilt in storage both in regards to her relationship with Faragonda and just in general and is relieved when Faragonda reassures her that everything is okay, especially between the two of them.

26. What would be their theme song?

Find Me by Sigma ft Birdy (acoustic version)

27. Who would sing their child back to sleep?

Griffin. Faragonda might join her but she’s also quite content just listening and watching. She also gets pretty lulled by Griffin’s singing.

28. What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Griffin is impossible when Faragonda can’t be with her for whatever reason. She gets irritable and starts making everyone miserable by turning even more pedantic than usual. Zarathustra and Ediltrude do their best to keep her occupied which sometimes involves lots of wine and chess.

Faragonda definitely handles separation better by doing things that will make her feel closer to Griffin like reading Griffin’s favorite book or tending to the plants. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t miss her super much, though.

29. One headcanon about this OTP that breaks your heart

They’ve ended up seriously hurting each other - both physically and emotionally - while Faragonda was with the Company and Griffin was with the Coven. They didn’t necessarily want to fight each other but were forced by the circumstances. There was also a decent amount of anger and despair on either side and the possibility that they might have actually hurt each other on purpose freaks them both out.

30. One headcanon about this OTP that mends it

They retire together on Domino and help raise Daphne and Bloom’s kids. Also, they have a peaceful life because they have been through so much and deserve some rest.

#winx club #winx griffin #winx faragonda #griffin x faragonda #winx headcanons #ask #hoanjakeahna

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watayaaratamblr · 4 years ago

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Arata is an unfortunate character.

No, he is NOT!

But if we wish to make him one, then we don't need one fifth of the effort put into making Taichi the "sad" character that most fans keep labeling as "Poor Taichi", and Arata would have been then the most unfortunate character in Chihayafuru. All we need is a good mangaka (Suetsugu is!) & the intention to make him draw sympathy (the whole point), simply because Arata’s story is well packed with good material serving the purpose.

Starting with the fact that he was an almost blind child … Like “looking through a magnifying glass”, hearing voices outside but being unable to see anything~ A child who had to wear glasses from the age of 3, any writer can make this a touching story if so they wished -But Suetsugu sensei did not want to.

Growing up as a weak boy who is a letdown in everything most boys do, crying alone when he fails to fit in, disappointing his father who kept pushing him to go outside and be “normal” like all the other children all while letting go of Karuta that he was confirmed to have liked since he was very young. Writing a bit of his struggles to find a place for himself within the norms could have made readers cry a lot.

His grandfather thankfully extended his hand to him, offered him a place where he can be himself; But that too, created a situation where he maybe had to take a side & deal somehow with the other side because his grandfather & his father had a fight and he can only be torn between them. I’m no writer myself, but I can make this sentimental.

Then his father took him away to Tokyo where he had to be a part of a poor family, and not only to cancel his needs & desires (like for example having different outfits for school instead of the few he will be noticed to wear frequently) but to also work sometimes to support his parents, to wake up before school time in the early mornings when other children are probably sound asleep in their warm beds, to go outside in the cold, to earn some cash and to give it to his parents … I read some real sad stories with this idea. So yeah, Arata could have been one of the saddest characters if Suetsugu wanted him to be.

And not to mention being bullied and laughed at for not only his impoverishment (which he can hope to change) but for his identity (as a boy from Fukui speaking a “weird” dialect). He received all this with lot of patience, and tried to comfort himself by himself with his grandfather’s “gift”, how it was a refugee for him.

Any writer can make a sob story out of Arata’s unspoken loneliness & yearning for home, his grandpa & for playing his beloved Karuta properly.

Or out the fact that he couldn’t make any friends in his new school either (he was confirmed to never have real friends since his childhood through the fact that he struggled to fit in + he stayed like that even after he grew up (like Murao said), and he is not someone who doesn’t care about having friends because he was confirmed to almost worship his bond with Taichi & Chihaya, Taichi specifically even though their friendship isn’t really a comforting one; he longed for friendship however it is!)

He enjoyed that friendship nonetheless, he might even have felt like he was compensated for everything he wished for through it but he was soon robbed of all of it as he was separated from these friends & while he could still enjoy a bit of it through correspondence (at least Chihaya kept in touch), he wasn't as untroubled as needed for that because he was about to lose his precious grandfather.

And the process of losing him wasn’t something to take lightly either. Having busy (or rather negligent?) parents made him (a boy not even 14 years old) a caregiver for an old man who suffered from paralysis on the right side of his body and later dementia, not as simple as that, he had to watch what his most beloved & respected person turn into day & night, when he worked “really hard” (as stated in the manga) with his rehabilitation exercises, when he helped him with his baths, he massaged his limbs, he fed him, constantly talked to him & showed him Karuta cards to “keep him” in this world. And when it's too much for him, he goes outside the room and cries bitter tears silently, all alone! There was this person who suffered from (PTSD) for years because their sick aunt didn’t recognize them (they were her favorite nephew before & they were 17 yo at the time), this person couldn’t visit her since & couldn’t see her before she died & they developed a fear of “getting too close” & of seeing sick people, they had to seek long & serious therapeutic help. And Arata actually suffered from PTSD for over a year & half, any psychologist can easily recognize that from the fact that he quit Karuta, refused to touch & hated to see the cards (I stress on this), how he answered Chihaya when she called him, how the calm & patient him (that we knew from his childhood) was agitated & treated her rudely when she insisted on playing a match. And it was all confirmed in Arata’s last words in the same chapter: “I wanted to see you, I always had, but I didn’t want you to see me like this” (in the official tr), he knew that he wasn’t himself (contrary to what Taichi thought, his friend who decided to abandon him instead of trying to help. Chihaya still had faith in him but Taichi was louder -ch10)

Still, thanks to Chihaya, Arata was back to his beloved Karuta, though we all questioned how much fun he really felt while playing again, how much of him was involved with the game now. And eventually, he himself expressed the pressure (not the fun) he felt while playing. What took his passion away, what turned the feelings of a Karuta baka into mere obligation, this also is good content for an emotionally charged story, it only needs the intention of the writer.

And he shone in the world of Karuta. YET he was never “proud” of it, that was never received as anything special. When he comes back home, none really cares (or at least, none shows any enthusiasm), he goes to the western-challenger qualifiers and his parents won’t even go watch, won’t even prepare some food for him, he comes back home late & finds none, and prepares everything by himself (apart from Yu’s help). His parents pray for his defeat, meaning that his DREAM to become Meijin/be strongest in Karuta doesn’t mean much to them, and he knows it, and he was never shown telling them the news like when you want to share a happy one. Arata’s mother -before giving up after acknowledging Arata’s dedication- wanted his defeat even though there was enough money to support him, the lack of money being the excuse she & her husband claimed to be the reason of their lack of support.

The support system Arata lacks isn’t only in his family. Since the death of his grandfather he seems to stand alone in Karuta too. Murao was the only one who spared some time for him but only after he realized how “alone” he was and took pity on him. Murao's realization implies that the training Arata was doing at the Nagumo society didn’t really count for what he really needed. Kuriyama sensei (being expected by fans to be the “Harada” in Arata’s side) was almost useless & he himself expressed his confusion about what to do with him & how to help him. We never saw him particularly guide him in any way either. "Experiences" & "taking chances" were two factors that helped Mizusawa members for example to grow a lot, but these chances are doors without knobs & we know that they were opened for them by adults who were taking care of them in a way or another + being friends ensured that they encouraged each other then proceeded with every idea they got to learn & experience more. Arata lacks both these sources (adults around him rather burdened him with their expectations) so he kept training on his own mostly & we saw how it felt frustrating to him to be relying only on his solo training & an "image" encouraged by a long-dead teacher, he realized the toll of lacking real opponents in practice with whom he can measure his abilities & correct his mistakes to grow stronger. Support can also be emotional. Did Arata ever receive particular emotional support? I can only remember panels where the people worried for him kept watching him from afar while he dealt with it on his own.

Yu was an exception but even her support was written in a way suggesting that Arata was prepared to go on without it. Because with time, Arata learnt to "not expect much" which is also a very interesting trope for a sad story.

And he was described as “a lonely player on top” but this was never elaborated to show how it felt like to be one for Arata himself. This idea is also brilliant for melancholy if the author wanted fans to sympathize with Arata but she didn't go beyond praising Chihaya who could somehow reach him & Shinobu chan.

And while playing on his own (or working part time to support himself), taking care of himself, he met his two precious friends again (they were the only selfish desire Arata has openly expressed throughout the series). But what he felt is that he was left behind & that he was the only one so far away. And he was. They got to experience so many things he didn’t, they made new friends & new bonds & he didn’t, they got closer to each other & he didn’t… At the end he went back to be the outsider & them the two old childhood friends. If the author wrote just a little bit more about these, if she highlighted these facts they could have made a good drama.

Love is the main reason Taichi is "felt for" (because he progressed in karuta but not in Love ..not yet at least). Arata is also a part of the love triangle in Chihayafuru, and if we try to summarize it with the intention of making it sad, then let's go, there is enough to say for that, we just need a good writer (which I'm not sadly). Still in short: Arata seems to have started to develop feelings for Chihaya a long time ago but he had to keep that in check because he thought she was dating Taichi & he kept his distance out of respect for that assumed relationship even though he craved at least connecting with his old friends. When he came closer, Chihaya was interested in him but he never knew, the enthusiasm she showed him was not different from how she is with everyone, no, Taichi received special treatment, while for him, every time he tries to say something to her he is cut off somehow. Everything seemed to be against them getting close. Later Chihaya seemed to have ultimate fun with Taichi too, maybe that was the only thing he thought he could give her, now she didn't need it. Maybe he had that thought again when she praised his game against Harada sensei that's why he confessed but soon, She is once again so far away, she seemed to need Taichi to function properly, he understood that & he used that to cheer her up in her most important tournament. He wanted badly to play with her again to only be totally iced, he couldn't even be seen by her, he was so far away, she belonged to where he wasn't part of (& even her friend kana found a way to express her disapproval of him) Can we not make a drama out of this? Or out of his stuttering, awkwardness & introversion? Or maybe the fact that his parents don't understand him? And did anyone alse feel that in most of Taichi's mother's appearances, we got this feeling that Taichi is a son who should be cared for while when Arata's parents appeared, many times, we can feel how Arata was used to highlight their feelings as individuals & he was drawn there as the member of the family who had to pay attention to that? Anyway, every single one of these points alone is very good material for a "tearjerker" so what about all of them combined? because they are all facts from Arata's reality.

Again, all we need is a good writer (we have it) & the intention to make it that way which isn't there. Suetsugu decided instead to put double the effort to make Taichi the "sorrowful/anguished" one because Arata is not a character written to feel sorry for or to commiserate. He is rather written for the most part of the manga as an inspiring one, an aspiration, to be a drive & a goal. So despite having all the above circumstances, he is instead written as a character who keeps to himself, doesn't complain, hides his hardships, makes it seem that he fine when he notices that someone is watching, tries to focus on what he has & be happy with it however little or simple. That's why it's easy for him to forget & forgive, easy for him to recover & stand up again because there are other characters who need him there as an example, who think that he is perfectly fine so they should only focus on themselves and thus, Bildungsroman can be used for them. And finally- wait, what were Taichi's problems again?

----------------------------------------------------

Writer adds:

#chihayafuru #wataya arata #ayase chihaya #chiharata #mashima taichi #this is dedicated to Arata fans who are constantly told they love a one dimensional character which is just ignorance speaking #or at least looking the other way when Arata actually is there!

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wolfcha1k · 4 years ago

Photo

"One look and I can't catch my breath Two souls into one flesh When you're not next to me I'm incomplete 'Cause I'm on fire like a thousand suns I couldn't put it out even if I wanted to These flames tonight Look into my eyes and say you want me, too Like I want you"

"All my life I've been looking for a place my parents wanted me to find, and I found it… but now? All I can think about is Eep. My best friend, my first… and only love."

Summary: Guy and Eep reflect on what has happened in the wake of these two crazy moons since their Tomorrow was challenged. There's damage that needs to be fixed and broken hearts to mend. - <3 - I used a ton of references from the movie as well as loosely traced bits, the kiss was referenced from the ending of "A New Age". I wanted to draw a proper cover for my new "chapter" for my "The Sun Was a Wayfarer" series, which is a bunch of one shots/little stand alone stories set in the same timeline despite it kinda skipping around a bunch. This one is "All I Can Think Of" as of now it takes place after "It's Our Nature" and before "A Tomorrow of Our Own", ngl, this chapter was mostly to practice writing kisses, I had some fun actually writing it. Usually I get hella embarrased lol I'm gonna paste the story beneath the picture, hope you like ~

The Sun Was a Wayfarer - Series

<Previous> Its Our Nature <next> A Tomorrow of Our Own

The moment Guy saw a chance to get away from the Pack he took it, quickly grabbing for Eep's hand to pull her down a random direction into the garden. She started in surprise before willingly following him with a trust Guy didn't feel he deserved anymore after last night. Guy didn't stop until he felt they were far enough away that nobody would find them without looking very hard, hidden behind some of the large gourds and corn.

He spun around to face her, letting out a long sigh. Guy just needed a moment to look at her, dark eyes worried and concerned as the adrenaline of what happened just a few hours ago finally seeped out of his body. Guy was covered in bruises and ached all over but it was nothing compared to the pain of when he thought he lost her forever three times in the span of just two terrifying days of his life. Somehow The End of the World felt miniscule in comparison now that Eep was his world.

His Tomorrow.

He rested his shaky hands on her shoulders, relief making him dizzy. Eep supported the sudden slumping of his weight, her green eyes wide with concern. "Guy! What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," he said, a tired smile on his face as he looked at her.

She held him up by the arms before lifting him up into hers. Eep sat down on the grass and positioned him on her lap, stroking the fringe of hair away from his face.

She could see the swollen purple bruises on his cheek and the black eye he had, his lower lip looked swollen and puffy. "You had a bad day," she sighed, cuddling him close.

"Yeah," he managed to chuckle, finding some amusement out of her words. "But it's better now that you're here…" He pressed a tired, sloppy kiss to her shoulder and rested his forehead there after. "Empathis on the better."

She just tugged him closer, as if her arms could squeeze the exhaustion and nerves right out of him. "I'm sorry," Eep suddenly said, muffling her face against his cheek. He felt moisture against his skin and the slight tremor in her arms and shoulders. "I'm really sorry."

Her warbled words cut him like a knife and he used his head to nudge her back so he could look at her. He could see the beginnings of tears on her eyelashes, gaze watery as she blinked it away stubbornly. Guy reached his hand to touch her face, feeling her recoil a bit before relaxing into his palm. He wiped his thumb under her eye, catching a tear.

He realized his own eyes felt moist all of a sudden, it'd been an emotionally charged couple of days. "It's okay, Eep. You didn't do anything wrong, I was just so stupid."

She sighed heavily, unwinding an arm from around his body so she could cover his hand with her calloused palm. Eep said nothing for several long moments, just clutched his hand like a life line.

"Eep?"

Eep finally looked at him, tearing her eyes from the random direction she'd sent her sights towards. "Yeah?"

"You're not hurt, are you?" Guy sat up a bit in her lap, cautiously letting his palms trace her broad shoulders, fingers squeezing tentatively to see if she would flinch. He knew she was good at hiding things like injuries, nursing them in private as to avoid upsetting Grug, it'd also extended to him now. She was strong but that didn't mean he wasn't allowed to worry over her.

"No, I don't have a scratch on me," she assured him but Guy didn't stop checking her. Eep let him fuss though, knowing it would make him feel better if he came to the conclusion himself. His touch felt nice though, Eep realizing how starved she was for it since being separated from each other.

He touched her back, her arms, her ribs, anywhere his hands could reach in a modest way, careful in his examination. After running a hand down her leg, his eyes fell to where the prohestic was once on her pinkie toe. "I'm so, so glad you actually don't have a toe there," he sighed, knowing it was one of the most nonsensical, bizarre phrases he'd ever uttered in his seventeen years of life.

"Guess getting bit by that bearyena came in handy for once," Eep quipped, trying to lighten the mood a little.

He also was relieved she hadn't been ripped in half during the struggle, it had to be a miracle of some kind. Guy didn't voice this though, just traced his hands slowly back up her body so he could hold her waist. He missed her so much and he was quick to show her that, words failing him as he gently brushed her lips in a kiss. He let his hands slide up her back to lovingly stroke her shoulders, feeling the muscles ripple under his palms. She shivered and he shook, he pulled her closer as if to warm them both but still the trembling never stopped.

He always did love her shoulders and muscles, the clinical and practical part of him admired the strength and power there, how they could flex and be used to take down beasts twice her size. Then there was the simplicity of just being a man who loved a beautiful woman and it inspired a different kind of appreciation in him.

One that he knew Grug who absolutely skewer him alive for, his heart longing and aching as he hugged Eep. He never knew he could be so needy, it should have been pathetic as a puppy following its master for attention, never satisfied.

They'd shared an intense kiss over the raging flames but it still wasn't enough after the longest dry spell he had ever known since meeting her. After that first kiss in the ocean, he never got enough of her now. He was greedy and never was ashamed of that when it came to loving her.

He only wanted to be with her until there were no more Tomorrows that crossed the sky.

Eep quickly cupped his face in her hands and surged forward against him, her ferocity taking him by surprise. He practically squeaked when he felt the nip of her teeth on his bruised lip but somehow he couldn't care less. Just welcomed it, tilting his head and taking in the taste of her as he brushed her tongue with his. It was like fire and he was more than happy to be burned, letting Eep fly with him like the wild tiger in his stories.

He drew away a moment, just the slightest breath away as he spoke, pressing a few rapid kisses to her lips with each word. "You." Kiss. "Have." Kiss. "No idea." Kiss. Kiss. "How much I missed you," Guy finished in a rush, breathless as he lowered his head to trail a series of kisses down the column of her throat, grazing his teeth lightly on the skin of her collarbone.

There was a hitch in her breath at the affection. "Can't be more than I missed you."

He went to nuzzle her ear, placing a chase kiss on her earlobe. Eep arched into him and he clutched her tight as if she were water slipping through his fingers. "I thought I was going to die seeing you up there," Guy uttered in a strained voice. He could picture it so clearly, seeing her leaping and bounding across skeletal remains hanging precariously from old tendrils of vine. The spiny mandrilla closed on her heels and he could do nothing but watch, screaming her name out in desperation until his throat went raw. "I screwed up and almost didn't get to fix it."

Guy felt Eep nudge his head away from her so they could look at each other properly again. She just traced her thumb over his cheek, tender as she marked one of his hand print shaped bruises. "You saved me," she finally said, leaning forward to steal a kiss, smiling against his lips as they brushed, once, twice and finally a proper one that had Guy's toes curling and his head fuzzy. "I was so happy when I saw you again, Guy."

He'd been more than shocked to have seen Eep and the others arrive, riding Chunky and a pack of wolfspiders. He had practically given his last rights, resolving painfully he would never see her again, never fix what he had done to her. His first and only love, he didn't need to meet any other girls to know what he felt was real and it was more than just a beautiful teenage romance.

"You want to talk about heroics? How many people come swooping in on a tiger and take on a giant monster single handedly," Guy pressed his forehead against hers, awed by her courage and humbled by her love for him. "And here I picked a tree over you."

"It wasn't just a tree," she lightly scolded him much to his surprise. "I get it now."

Guy felt moisture collect on his eyelashes and without another thought, closed the distance between them once more. He let his hands roam, touching every part of her out of fear he would forget how warm and solid her body felt in his arms. It was almost like a dream, eyes shut tightly and listening to the soft little gasps in her breath, the way her chest heaved against his own. He hated needing to breathe when all he wanted was this, reluctantly pulling away as he felt light headed, exhilarated and breathless.

"Never again," he promised her, nuzzling his nose against hers. Eep practically purred at the loving attention, letting her palms rest on his shoulders to gently knead the tension there. He shuddered, forehead pressed into hers, knowing the gesture meant so much more than simple touch to her. "I'd rather chop off both my legs than lose you again. Please never scare me like that, I couldn't bare it."

She kissed his lips, gentle before in all her passionate nature, looped her arms around his neck and kissed him enough that Guy was convinced he'd forget his own name.

But that was okay, because she reminded him, pulling away. "Guy, I love you," she only said, beaming at him.

"Please say it again," he pleaded.

"I love you."

He felt his eyes growing glassy again and Eep kissed a tear away from below his eye, soft and tender. He smiled at her, embracing her tightly once more from his comfortable position in her lap. "I love you more," he murmured, kissing her shoulder.

"I love you more," she protested, lightly shoving him to nibble his ear, feeling his weight push into her.

"No, I said I love you more first."

"And I'm telling you I love you more right back," she purred, lifting her neck to give him better access to her jawline when he started to press an open mouth kiss there.

He felt her pulse rush under his lips like she'd ran a marathon, skin flushed as red as her hair. He couldn't help but kiss her again and again.

"You're so stubborn," he grumbled good naturedly, nuzzling her.

"Takes one to know one, babe." Eep grinned at him, stroking the nape of his neck and fiddling with his top knot.

It was just them now and feeling thrilled that he had her to himself, gently nudged her down, feeling her eyes bore into his. Guy braced his arms above her, not caring his muscles throbbed in protest. He could see the sun as it set shimmering there, burning with more than mere fire.

Her eyes were nearly amber in the low light of the evening, glinting with love. Those same eyes reminded him of the first night they met, curious and glowing as the fire flickered. He touched her face, fingers curling under her chin, taking in her flushed cheeks and kiss swollen lips. It was a good look for her. She was beautiful, and no amount of sleeping suns in the sky would ever compare.

There must have been something in his expression for he saw her tremble and emotion swelled within him as he shut his eyes. He ached in more ways than just the pain from the ordeal with getting pummeled by a bunch of punch monkeys.

No more words were spoken for a long time, whoever reached for whom first he didn't care. All that mattered was now she was in his arms, heart pressed against heart and the gentle whispers of breath against lips. She arched into him and it took all his might to remember how to breathe. She palmed his shoulder suddenly with a growl, pushing him beneath her and he didn't fight her.

No one and no thing would ever separate them again, he thought as he caught her lips once more in a fluid movement.

Grug had panicked when he realized Guy and Eep had disappeared. After today, who could really blame him for it? Everyone was quick to volunteer to find them, Ugga crouching to encourage Sandy to use that skilled sense of smell of hers. The fierce little tot bounded into the fields, disappearing into the tall grass and crops.

"She's got the scent!" Gran exclaimed, hobbling after her youngest granddaughter.

Grug just worried and worried, Ugga absently massaging a kink out of his large neck. "Relax, the farm is safe. I'm sure Eep and Guy are alright, Grug."

"Still," he began with a frown. "I'd feel better knowing that with my own eyes, honey."

They'd followed Sandy through the gardens, the farther they went the more Grug fretted. It felt too long when Sandy finally paused, several large bushes and crops shielding the view. She pawed in the direction of it, turning to giggle and pounce into Ugga's awaiting arms.

"Good girl, Sandy," she praised, pressing her cheek against hers fondly.

Grug lead the way, parting the foliage. Everyone shoved about behind him and attempted to peak around him, making the caveman huff in annoyance.

The family came upon the couple hidden amongst the fields of other worldly produce, cozy together on the grass as they traded needy little kisses. Alternating between whispering, giggling and pressing a small kiss here or there, Guy and Eep were content in their bubble. Guy was curled up as content as a house cat right in her lap, Eep's arms around him in a hug. The sight would have infuriated Grug once upon a time ago but he'd seen a lot in just two days.

Things changed and so did he. His daughter deserved happiness and having seen just how broken Guy had been over her, he knew it wasn't just puppy love.

It was full grown.

"Aw," Dawn gushed as she peeked over Grug's shoulders, standing on her tiptoes. "How cute, are they always like that?"

The typical young boy that he was, Thunk made a face, his travel window lowering. "Bleh," he only said. "Again already?"

Gran snorted and leaned over to Dawn to say inconspicuously, "You have no idea, smart girl."

Belt's only response from around Dawn's torso was to make a swooning gesture, unwinding an arm to drape it over his face. Dawn chuckled when immediately after the sloth was gushing over Sash who'd leaned down to nuzzle noses with Guy's little friend. "I get the picture."

Hope folded her hands to her chest, "I can't believe we tried breaking them up… who does that?"

The words Hope said affected Grug more than he wanted to admit and guilt swelled inside him.

Ugga patted him gently on the shoulder, rousing her mate's quiet contemplation. "Well?" Ugga asked him in that soft voice of hers, gray eyes shifting back towards Guy and Eep.

"Leave them be," Grug told her and the others, shaking his head with a reserved little smile. He felt sad but there was a fatherly resolve in his heart. Eep would always be his little girl but he had to accept she had her own life to live now.

One with many Tomorrows that he knew Guy could give her, there was no doubt the young man was going to give her the world on a silver platter. The thought of her leaving was like a knife in his heart, even Guy would be a tough bone to swallow, after all, Grug had called him son. And as a father, he only wanted what was best for them, even if it meant it wasn't here with him anymore.

Gran stomped her cane on the grass. "Who are you and what have you done with our Lunkhead?"

Grug grunted, "What? I'm not allowed to have a change of heart now?"

Ugga leaned her head against his fondly. "I'm proud of you, big guy."

Grug didn't want to get emotional, feeling the moisture gather in his eyes. Phil threw an arm over his shoulders on the side Ugga didn't occupy.

"Something on your mind, bro?" His eyes were sympathetic.

He sniffled, "Nothing, really." Grug shrugged Phil's arm off and sighed.

"You can tell me," Phil encouraged, lifting a hand in an encouraging manner.

"I don't wanna."

"I'm knocking on the door, big guy. Let me in!" He persisted.

Grug side eyed him, knowing no matter what he said the lanky Betterman was going to get his way. "It's just… gonna be hard to let them go," he said, the words slightly warbled. He was a big scary caveman but he'd always been soft in the heart despite the stoney exterior.

Gran scoffed, the old matriarch beginning to hobble away. "There's our Grug now. The big baby."

Phil patted him on the back, "There, there, it'll be alright. Besides, I have a solution to your little problem."

He looked uncertain as Phil led him away from the serene couple, the rest of the family following behind. "What do you mean 'solution'?"

"Let's just say it's a wedding present for our favorite pair of lovebirds, Gruggers. You can help me get it ready, they'll take one look at it and want to stay forever." Phil then fondly nudged his friend's back. "Just please learn to use doors, Guy won't be happy if you tear a hole in their little love nest. Knocking will save you a lot of grief too."

"Love nest?" Grug echoed and for a moment the protective father that wanted to smother his daughter peeked out.

Before he could regret his decision, it was a joint effort to shove him towards the large tree on the property, hefting a sigh and pouting as Ugga just laughed.

And oblivious to the world around them, Guy and Eep stayed stuck together, joint by the heart.

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evelhak · 4 years ago

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“Ancient” wlw ships

This is such a self-indulgent post but I need to get my thoughts out. Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about all the girls I shipped in fiction when I was a kid and didn’t realize I was shipping them.

I mean, they pretty much all had boyfriends or ended up marrying a man, and I was pretty much on board, in my eyes it was just some part of the story that needed to happen, because it always did. I think the common thing with these characters was that the female best friend was, at least more often than not, narratively more important than the guy, or just seemed to have a much greater emotional impact in the story.

Thinking about this has been so fun and eye-opening that I just feel like sharing a list of my biggest ancient wlw pairs that I only now, years later, realize were totally in love in my mind, I just didn’t have a concept for it yet. I’m sure that’s relatable for some people, but maybe there’s someone out there who was shipping these same characters??

This will include mild spoilers. And it’ll be long.

1. Cornelia & Elyon from W.i.t.c.h.

I COMPLETELY lived in these comics when I was 8-12 years old, and nothing in it was as compelling to me as Cornelia and Elyon. Guess I was already a sucker for best-friends-to-enemies-to-friends-again, even though I didn’t realize I also wanted them to become lovers. Best friends was all there was to me back then, that was the name I assigned to the highest form of love in my head. Which I still don’t see as invalid? I just didn’t realize I would’ve related to the romance aspect between best friends a hell of a lot more than I did to any of the relationships the W.i.t.c.h. girls had with their boyfriends. Cornelia and Caled was almost as bad as Buffy and Angel! Cornelia and Peter was just boring af. All the other W.i.t.c.h. girls’ boyfriends were all equally boring to me except for Will and Matt, but that was because their struggle to admit their feelings for each other was written in a funny way, not because their relationship had any actual depth.

But Elyon and Cornelia would’ve been perfect! I mean if your best friend has the ability to understand you so well, that with her magical intuition, she can draw you a picture of a guy you’re going to fall for, a guy she has never met... why would you even want to be with that guy anymore? Why wouldn’t you just be with her instead?? What Cornelia and Caleb had was limerence (I actually applaud the comics for eventually treating it as such and showing how it was harmful to both of the characters!) but what Cornelia and Elyon had was true love that transcends dimensions. Cornelia never gave up on Elyon, not even for a moment, after she became the W.i.t.c.h. girls’ enemy, and when she was in trouble, Cornelia had a hunch from another dimension, and she didn’t hesitate to come to her rescue. (The fact that during the same mission she also manages to fall for the dude Elyon drew for her in the past seems more like an accident, to be honest. The real deal was patching things up with Elyon, it was both more emotionally impactful AND more plot-relevant!)

It was also really sad to read the comics sometimes, because Elyon was absolutely my favourite character, and she wasn’t around much after the first arc, being a queen in another dimension. But every time there was a flashback to when Elyon was still living on Earth and being cute with Cornelia I was like MOOOOORE.

2. Sora and Layla from Kaleido Star

If you haven’t watched this anime you’ve missed. SO. MUCH. This is probably my favourite anime ever. And it features another type of ship I LOVE. Which is partners in some sort of activity, usually sports. When it’s written well it’s just so impactful and intense. These girls are routinely risking their lives in their passion for acrobatics, so they need to have absolute trust in each other. And oh boy is the relationship between them written well. I love it when two characters initially don’t get the way the other thinks or sees the world, but as they grow closer, it’s the other’s way of thinking that really unlocks something huge for them.

Also what’s so compelling about Sora and Layla is that there really isn’t anything like them in any other anime, that I’ve come across, at least. These partnerships are always between two guys in a sports anime, the partnership is at the heart of the story and the emotional stakes are so high it’s no wonder most people don’t want to ship these guys with their intended female love interests. Kaleido Star takes this even further because the guy who is in love with Sora is literally a joke, or the fact that he’s in love with Sora is a running gag, and nothing more. All the focus is on Sora and Layla as partners, and how they change each other's lives for the better.

Also the way Sora pines for Layla when she’s away or not paying enough attention to her is SO... I mean you don’t even have to think it’s romantic for it to absolutely melt you. Although it feels pretty heavily romantically coded, and it doesn’t even feel like queer baiting, because it’s just SO real and honest. And how Layla can’t stop thinking about how Sora is changing her as a person. There’s no question about the fact that the relationship between these women is the true meat of the show.

3. Anne and Diana from Anne of Green Gables

I read these books over and over again as a kid, and the Netflix show renewed my love for these two. They are kind of ridiculous, but SO cute. Looking back, it seems obvious that they had a crush on each other, they were just SO giddy all the time they were alone. Sure, you can excuse all their romantic gestures (like changing locks of hair, and vowing to never leave each other with joined hands and grand words) with saying Anne just romanticizes everything, but it never really felt like just that to me.

I’ll never forget how devastated Anne was about Diana getting married, and I don’t remember the wording but initially she wished she could keep Diana to herself for their whole lives. And every time they talked about marriage it was something they were both gonna do not as individuals, but rather the emphasis seemed to be on the shared experience, and how their children would be best friends and all that. It was all about them together. Like their romantic fantasies were nothing without the other somehow in the picture.

I don’t hate Anne and Gilbert but I don’t love them either. Gilbert has always been just sort of “meh”. He’s okay, but also the kind of love interest that can never compel me much.

4. Chocolat and Vanilla from Sugar Sugar Rune

Seriously, this would have been SO GOOD if it was canon.

Think about it, best friends, chosen to compete against each other for the throne. These witches go to the human world to attract male attention and collect feelings from the men, turning the feelings into heart shaped crystals and whoever collects more will be the queen. I mean... the story was good as it is but if they had ended up together and been queens TOGETHER?? That would have been the best story. It could have had SUCH a compelling best-friends-to-competitors-to-enemies-to-friends-to-lovers storyline! There would have been room for so much character development.

And if my memory doesn’t betray me the story would not change much at all if they didn’t end up with the guys they do end up with! Especially Vanilla’s guy is like an afterthought and Chocolat’s guy is... well, a sum of my least favourite tropes, including the one that will remind everyone about Mortal Instruments a LITTLE too much, so he can get lost for all I care.

I cried many times while reading this, and it always had something to do with these two girls.

5. Yoko and Liao from Yoko Tsuno

Okay, these two might have a problematic age gap, I’m not sure, but I didn’t know of that possibility as a kid, they just looked the same age to me. I was a huge Yoko Tsuno fan as a pre-teen, and there were so many interesting female adventurers in this series but for some reason the dynamic between Yoko and Liao was my favourite, even though Liao only appeared in one album. I just really felt like I needed to see more of these characters interacting and where their relationship would develop.

There was something about them that seemed rather original to me then, and a nice change. The reader had already gotten used to Yoko as the hero, she was always saving the day everywhere, she was like The Doctor in a way and not only because she time-travelled. She is simply badass. In Liao’s story there’s a prophecy about a girl who speaks to a dragon and saves everyone, and Yoko thinks that girl is her because she’s from the future and knows the dragon is a machine, but it turns out to be Liao, and that was somehow really satisfying. Yoko treats Liao obnoxiously in the beginning, doesn’t give her much credit, but is deeply humbled after Liao needs to save her ass multiple times because she’s just too sure of herself. It was cool to see how Yoko really needed to grow in this story and realize her limitations, and how wrong she was to treat Liao the way she did and look down on her just because Liao was physically weak, had a temper, and came from a much earlier time period than Yoko.

By the end they are clearly very attached to each other (Liao weeping in Yoko’s arms and Yoko confessing how full of herself she was when they met) and respect each other, and I just really would’ve liked to see where they would go from there. I thought about them meeting again A LOT when I was a kid.

That’s my big five! :D I could go on but this is already long, I need to sleep, and these are the characters that I’ve been thinking about the most lately. If you read this far for some reason it would be cool to hear if you have any similar (or different) experiences.

#old ships #wlw #w.i.t.c.h #kaleido star #yoko tsuno #anne of green gables #sugar sugar rune #personal #rambly

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otonymous · 5 years ago

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Time After Time: Victor’s Firsts (MLQC NSFW Headcanon)

Hey everyone!

Thanks to all who voted in my Twitter poll to see whose NSFW “Firsts” headcanons they wanted to read next. 💕Victor was the undisputed victor (haha!) over Kiro, so I hope you all enjoy my longest headcanons to date...ALL 18 MINUTES OF IT! (these totally got out of hand, for whatever reason LOL) 😵😆

Warning: NSFW/18+: Explicit/graphic language - reader discretion is advised.

Naughtiness ensues after the cut!

A Time To Learn: Your Relationship With Victor:

A battle of wills and wits that gradually blossoms into a relationship founded on mutual trust and admiration, learning and growth

Your relationship with Victor isn't easy, especially at the beginning when you are learning about each other and how to mesh with one another — it will be a hard-won love, but one that’s absolutely worth the payoff in the end

Victor is very logical, pragmatic, stubborn, domineering and - especially at the beginning — overprotective (tends to withhold information from you if he feels it would hurt or harm you in any way). While his intentions come from a good place, it will annoy you to no end to be sheltered like this

But as the relationship progresses and Victor comes to fully understand that you are a grown woman capable of holding her own and making her own decisions, he will gradually cease this type of behaviour

Initially, it will be hard for you to know where you stand because of Victor's reluctance to let his poker face slip and reveal his emotions. But when you finally see him crack a smile, or hear the soft chuckle of his deep laughter followed by a muted exclamation of “dummy” or “idiot,” you’ll feel like you’ve won the lottery, becoming addicted to doing whatever you can to see the corners of those lips tug up when he thinks no one is the wiser

When you first defy him, Victor is pleasantly surprised: he's used to getting his way personally and professionally because his overwhelming presence, business acumen and instinct usually lead him in the right directions, so he has rarely ever encountered opposition. While he is initially taken aback by your bravado, he’ll find your attitude refreshing, amusing even. His cock will too (more on this later) 😆

This is the type of relationship where one person fills in the gaps of the other: you'll soften Victor’s hard edges, temper the manner with which he interacts with others, and make him laugh harder than he ever thought possible. You are the figurative sunshine in his life, the warmth he has been missing for so long.

On the other hand, Victor lends you his unflappable confidence, his expertise and experience, the will to stick to your guns and really fight for the things you want. He is your safe haven, champion and protector.

Talk is cheap for Victor, who prefers to show love and affection by way of action: brewing medicinal soups when you’re sick (with a spoonful of caramel pudding at the ready to chase away the bitter aftertaste), tucking a cozy throw over you when you’ve fallen asleep on the sofa yet again, cooking your favourite foods when he knows you’ve had a rough day, waiting outside your office in the pouring rain to drive you home when he knows you’ve forgotten your umbrella

He also loves to high-key spoil you: whisk you away on his private jet for spontaneous weekend getaways at Lake Como or Bali, beautiful bouquets arranged on your desk Monday mornings at the office just because, an impromptu Champs-Élysées shopping excursion when you mention needing a new winter coat…THAT BLACK CARD THOOOO

Victor is a steadfast lover: reliable, responsible and always, always there when you need him. He is your rock, a solid foundation from which you are emboldened to jump and reach for the stars…forever knowing he will be there to catch you if you fall

He often anticipates your needs, sometimes even before you realize them. And as your relationship progresses, the ways in which he offers help will become less overbearing and more sensitive to your feelings and your right to make an informed decision

Victor is most expressive in the bedroom. For all his emotional reservedness in his everyday life, the passionate nature he keeps buried deep inside is finally given an outlet through sensual pleasures

As with everything else in his life, lovemaking is serious business for Victor. He is an intense lover who wants to be the very best, the one to erase even the tiniest shreds of whoever came before him. He needs to leave his mark on you, physically and emotionally. Even if he wasn’t your first, he’d be damned if he’s not your last.

Ever the epicurean, Victor is the pussy-eating champion. Thoroughly devoted to exploring you orally, the man would go for hours if you’d let him, taking care not to miss a single inch of trembling flesh. Obsessed with numbers, Victor is not satisfied to move on to something else until he’s given you multiple orgasms with his tongue alone.

The man is humming(!) in pleasure as he eats: lips, chin and cheeks shiny with your arousal and his spit. This will be the only time you see Victor with less than impeccable table manners

Victor considers it a point of pride and responsibility to bring you to your climax well before he reaches his own

The man also loves to see you in elegant silks, satins and lace and will surprise you with the most beautiful lingerie

In all honesty though, garter belts, stockings, stilettos and nothing else are this man's jam when he really gets down to business

Needless to say, Victor’s super fit and muscular physique translates to stamina for days...

The First Kiss:

Having spent an exhausting day ironing out the minute details of your proposal with Victor, you slump onto the leather sofa in the corner of his office, meaning to take a 5 minute power nap to recharge while Victor leaves the room for a bathroom break

“The man is a machine…” you think to yourself, stealing a quick glance at your phone before the weight of heavy eyelids finally shepherds you to slumber: 9:15 pm

You are out cold. Dead to the world. You don't even hear the click of the door as it opens, or the soft approach of polished Oxfords when Victor quietly crouches to bring his face level with yours, gazing at your sleeping form, undisguised tenderness completely transforming that stoic visage

Victor is smiling, one large hand curling into a loose fist before it rises to cover his mouth — the side of his index smoothing over his cupid’s bow in an unconscious bid to satisfy the desire for physical contact

Jet black eyes sweep from disheveled hair to the delicate silver chain around your neck, pupils widening as they trace the line of your collarbone upon which the sapphire pendant lay

Then…slowly….as if caught in the pull of some hypnotic tide, Victor moves even closer, Adam’s apple prominent in his throat as he swallows. Paying no heed to the heat gathering beneath an increasingly tight collar, the man continues studying your face, intent on mapping every smooth contour onto his mind for posterity

It is only when he feels the warmth of your breath on his cheek that he stops, breaking out of his trance and mentally chastising himself for almost losing control. For losing himself in the sight of your soft lips parted in slumber

Just when he makes to stand and cover you with his suit jacket, your eyes fly open to lock onto his

Time stops. Lost in the intensity of the gaze, neither of you dare to even breathe, let alone speak, lest the sanctity of the moment is broken

The sheer proximity of Victor Li has you captivated: cedar wood and pine wafting subtle from burning skin, long lashes softening dark eyes that blazed with hunger, lips that trembled ever so slightly with longing until you couldn’t help but become famished for just one taste…

And before you can even make sense of what you’re doing, you've propped yourself up on one elbow, bridging the gap between your lips and his — plush, soft and slightly parted

Victor’s eyes widen for a moment, a thousand different emotions silently brewing inside that busy mind until the slide of your tongue into his mouth blankets the chaos with a quiet calm. Only then does the LFG CEO yield completely to the warmth of your lips and the fire in his soul, eyes closed as he finally allows his body to take what it wants, what it has yearned for since the day you challenged him

And when he gets to this point, Victor's kiss deepens, becoming more and more aggressive until you’re forced to pull back for a bit of air before diving in for a second round

Confession Of Love:

This man is not the type to throw the word “love” around lightly, so when he tells you he loves you, he MEANS IT. It’s not lust. It’s not like. It’s a Ride or Die type of commitment.

Victor Li leaves very little to chance. The first time he tells you he loves you, he will have planned it…WAY in advance

The man knows timing is everything (haha!) and will choose the very special occasion of your birthday to make his confession

He rearranges his work schedule (and yours) for the special day, flying you out to Paris on his private jet

At exactly 1:14 pm, he’ll present you with your gift at the very top of the Eiffel Towel: a ladies’ version of the Patek Philippe timepiece he himself wears

The back will be engraved with both your initials and the numbers 1-3-1-4. You'll start shaking the moment you see it.

1:14 pm, 13:14, 1-3-1-4: all essentially meaning "forever" when pronounced in Chinese

Honestly, it will feel like a proposal and in a sense, it is: once Victor is absolutely certain about someone, he will never let them go. His love is for life.

You are absolutely speechless, hands trembling so hard that Victor has to hold them steady before he slips the watch onto your wrist

Then, after taking a moment to savour the sweetness of having a shared token of love, Victor bends to place a kiss on the back of your hand, the most tender look in his eyes when he finally looks up to say, “I love you. Happy birthday.”

Doesn’t that sound much nicer than "dummy"?! 😆

The First Night

Despite all the impossible deadlines Victor sets for you in the course of your professional collaborations, the man is incredibly patient when it comes to matters of the heart

Until Victor tells you he loves you, he will not have sex with you (much to your horny chagrin)

This is actually specific to you and not his personal code of conduct per se. In the past, the man has had no problems bedding women he’s had, at most, lukewarm feelings for

But YOU are a totally different breed, worlds apart from the starlets and socialites that threw themselves at his feet

Victor is fascinated by your honesty: the frankness of your words, your artless behaviour. Mesmerized by the fact that he can read you like an open book (which is why he is so keen on protecting you from those who would use that to their advantage). Touched by the genuine kindness and consideration that guides much of what you do. Impressed by your tireless spirit in fighting for the people and things you care about

In short, he has never met another person quite like you, especially in the cut-throat world of business and high society where he has learned to excel — a place where poker-faced people keeping their cards close to their chests are the norm and not the exception

Holding out on sex is as painful and torturous to Victor as it likely is to you; the man is incredibly attracted to you, and has been since the day you dared to challenge him to secure funding for your company. Deep down, Victor knows you had him ensnared the moment he saw the fire burning in your eyes (not like he’d ever tell you though LOL)

And each time work brought you before him, the man couldn’t help but notice something new to admire: the way your hair fell in soft wisps — begging to be gently tucked behind the shell of your ear, the captivating flutter of lashes as tired eyes blinked back fatigue, the pleasing lilt of your voice even as you laced your words with sarcasm

It wasn’t long before Victor found his thoughts drifting to you, haunting his nights and sneaking up on him during the day…especially when he was in the shower, eyes closed and moans amplified in the wet heat as his large hand reached down to stroke the length of his cock — imagining your legs wrapped around his waist, your tongue nimble on his shaft

In spite of all this pent-up tension, Victor doesn't rush into sex because he wants things to be done right. You are the most important person in his life and he feels the need to eliminate any possibility of things going wrong

In short, he won’t treat you like the women who came before because there’s absolutely no comparison: no one has ever made him feel the way you do

That being said, it doesn’t mean you and Victor won't get up to some extreme heavy-petting: grinding on his lap in his Bugatti, palming him through his dress pants at the office, a hand slipped beneath your skirt when you’re bent over wiping kitchen counters at Souvenir as payment for your meal

So when Victor gives you the ultimate birthday gift of finally telling you he loves you, the two of you are hightailing it back to your penthouse suite at the grandest hotel in Paris, bodies already flush against each other and kissing as the French do in the privacy of an ascending elevator

BUT Victor is the king of deliciously unhurried love making. It is his preferred modus operandi. After all, the man really knows how to enjoy the finer things in life: food, wine, your body and every single reaction of bliss that can be teased out of it.

You can bet that Victor will fuck you nice and slow and thoroughly.

PREPARE TO BE PAMPERED LIKE A QUEEN

Strains of Duke Ellington & John Coltrane's “In a Sentimental Mood” are being piped through built-in speakers as Victor approaches you from behind, notes of pine and cedar accompanying the heat of his body, wafting in gentle waves to make the fine hairs of your skin stand on anticipatory end

And as you watch the sun kiss the horizon through a bank of floor-to-ceiling windows — orange rays setting the Eiffel Tower ablaze in a sea of luminous fire — fingertips are trailing up your bare arms, Victor gently gathering your hair to sweep it over one shoulder before pressing his lips to the nape of your neck, eyes closed and inhaling deep, trying to hold on to the subtle sweetness of your skin

His hands, incredibly dextrous despite their size, easily tease apart the knot of your halter dress and you tremble under the intensity of his gaze over your shoulder as they watch satin trace every curve — your dress dropping to pool on cool marble at your feet

There is something especially exquisite about seeing the City of Light laid out before you as you’re slowly laid bare by Victor. And just when you start to blush at standing stark naked before the fully clothed CEO, he places your hands on his chest, seductive command permeating that deep voice when he says, “Undress me.”

Sliding your palms over the broad expanse of his pecs, you palpate the rhythm of his heart, caress the lines of hard muscle beneath that perfectly starched dress shirt

By the time your fingers are unbuttoning his collar, his Adam's apple is already bobbing in his throat, the deep breaths he’s drawing to rein in desire amplifying the rise and fall of his chest

When the last button is undone, the sight of Victor’s gloriously perfect torso erodes the last of your frayed patience and you’re practically tearing the shirt off his muscular arms, wrestling with his belt. And although you are dying inside from your lack of finesse, Victor is secretly thrilled that you want him that badly. Full marks 😆

Finally….finally….that beautiful body is revealed in all its glory: sculpted from innumerable laps in his olympic sized pool and so genetically blessed below the belt that your mouth is watering at the sight

BUT FIRST, a bath! Blue balls be damned, Victor Li will enjoy this moment to its fullest. He knows that a slow seduction can build up to the most explosive sex. Clearly.

The man will absolutely insist on bathing you, don't even try to fight it. He gets an acute sense of satisfaction from taking care of you in every sense of the word. Also, there’s nothing quite like the slippery slide of his hands all over your body

Step into the marble infinity tub and lay back against his broad chest. Soak in the warm waters as you take in the view of the city around you, the peony-scented candles, the white-petaled orchids…all meticulously planned by the man soaping you from behind, gentle hands exploring

Lose yourself in his touch: fingertips trailing after bubbles that glide over the swell of your breasts, large hands submerging to wrap around your waist until they cross at the navel, moving down to rub languid circles between your legs until you tremble — Victor’s lips finding yours when your head falls back against his shoulder in bliss

And when you reach behind to feel him - long, hot and hard - his soft groans will drive you to the precipice of madness until you’ve got him sitting on the edge of the tub: face a mask of ecstasy to feel your lips on him, your greedy mouth never seeming to get enough of his delicious flesh

Best believe that Victor almost has a heart attack when you let him slip from your mouth when he begins to twitch, observing him with innocence in your eyes as you pump him to completion, teasing the tip of his cock with your hardened nipples while he coats your chest in his release

The man is DONE when you finally look down at your breasts as if surprised, gathering up his cum with the tip of your index and bringing it to your lips for a taste, coy smile blooming all the while on your face

Jaw tightens. Cock hardens. And suddenly the world around you slows to a stand-still as you’re lifted so quickly you barely have time to think before his hands are coaxing your legs around his trim waist, your body wet and slippery against Victor’s as he carries you to the bedroom

Laying you upon the king-sized bed, Victor’s lips seek the heat between your thighs — lapping fast, tasting slow, drawing out slick pleasure to coat his tongue and wrench his name from somewhere deep in your throat

Nothing gets Victor Li hotter, faster, than the sound of your voice, desperate and needy for him. The man is addicted to it. You can bet he won’t be emerging from between your legs until his cheeks and chin are so shiny it’s obscene, and you’ve lost count of how many times you’ve convulsed against his fingers and tongue, orgasms bleeding one into the other like sweetly turbulent waves

And when he finally rises — your flavour faint on his tongue as his lips find yours — he’ll swallow your moans as he finally pushes into you: gradual, gentle, savouring every searing twitch of muscle adjusting to the welcome intrusion of his long, thick heat

Hips moving fast, swaying slow…pelvis grinding in circles to hit your clit because he can’t get enough of the way you shudder against him, or the sting of your teeth sinking into the flesh of his shoulders (mark him up, Victor LOVES it)

EDGING: Victor will hit that spot with expert precision over and over again till you’re on the verge of exploding…only to pull away, rhythm slowing to a grind to leave you hyperventilating and dizzy with need as this torturous pattern repeats

When he finally lets you (and himself) come, you are a sweaty, screaming mess, nails scratching to leave crimson welts on Victor’s back that will make the man smile to see in the mirror the following morning

Victor likes to remain buried deep within you for a bit after his release, holding you in his arms as he peppers you with kisses: on your lips, cheeks, forehead and eyelids

Afterwards, you can bet that the CEO will have a full spread delivered to the suite, where the two of you will spend the rest of the evening feeding each other in bed in between rounds of passionate lovemaking. Remember? Victor has stamina for DAAAAAYYYYYSSS and has to make up for lost time 😂

⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱⏱

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