#which made me realise I'm probably a lesbians

[ofieloafi]

I love drinking and playing lobotomy corporation 🥰

[elizabethrobertajones]

summer scions!! I absolutely love the new portraits for all their smug happy expressions. Except Y'shtola, who is not going to deign to give a camera a proper saucy look because that's silly. Urianger is smirking twice as hard on her behalf.

Glam review under the cut!

I unlocked Alphinaud first of the twins and didn't know Alisaie had a little necktie yet, so I'm deducting a point from my first impression because the sheer delight that he had a silly little necktie of some sort no matter the situation delighted me so thoroughly. Since they're still engaging in matchy twin dressing to some degree, I have to assume they either like it and won't admit it after digging in so hard, or Ameliance sent them off with cute outfits and matching backpacks, and they still don't really shop for themselves.

He's got the practical watch/compass gloves which are good for a technically proficient Sage and probably the most practical gear he's ever worn except for when he was poncho Alphy, but wearing ankle-length jeans seem like the least weather-appropriate choice of the Scions if we assume their average skin coverage is a good weathervane for the temperature in Tural. I chalk it up to teenage awkwardness.

8/10 unless he and Alisaie chose their outfits themselves, in which case it's a 9/10

I think Alisaie is the only Scion to keep a single piece of their default gear, and those are her usual gloves. She's colour-matched around it.

Because of the gloves and boots, she looks the most ready for hardcore hiking, somehow, and her matching Alphinaud with a cute button down shirt with rolled up sleeves along with that particular choice of baggier shorts (when she normally wears more form fitting shorts) do give me the closest to butch vibes it's probably likely to get for main characters. So I'm giving her an extra point I stole from Alphinaud for the lesbian vibes.

9/10 or 10/10 if she made these choices all by herself.

Everything about this cracks me up, from his portrait above to the image of him tanking open shirted once he pulls mobs.

Believe it or not, he's getting an additional point for those shoes simply because the competition in practicality in tanking is G'raha.

I had a moment of excitement when I thought the necklace was pink because that's always a cute Ryne/Minfillia thing fanartists give him with ribbons and such, but once I got zoomed in on him it was red, so I guess he's just been shopping. Although, the turquoise shorts are her eye colour and the actual large diamond shapes are secretly Mothercrystal coded in those colours, which just cracks me up that you can pick out one of the worse days of his life (Urianger's grand Warrior of Darkness plan) in his Chill Summer Beach Vibes look.

Douchebag beach bro shell bracelet as well, which really makes me double down on him and Urianger spending way too much on tourist bait along the stalls in the Famous Turali Market. The hat and sunglasses are giving him one of the Most tourist-y looks thematically reflecting how a lot of the Scion guys were just here to hang out, narratively or literally. Maybe he's trying not to get such an intense tan again, which is the only reason he's not entirely topless.

11/10 I could not stop laughing when I got him and Urianger to 100 and Beheld The Brilliance in the same moment.

Please note the raised sunglasses in Urianger's portrait, which are not the model his character uses.

I am delighted that I had been incorporating that island watch into my healer glams on both the logic you need to know your clock positionals but also they're largely the smarty pants jobs (WHM being vibes only aside - it gets its own glams :P). And here's Urianger and Alphinaud both using watches.

Now, I had a moment of being vaguely disappointed he had trousers not a skirt or something else swishy and androgynous, but then I did realise that I, a nonbinary weirdo who relates to Urianger since he made me nonbinary, have actually gone to a couple of garden parties dressed in some variation of this exact outfit of light trousers and a nice button up. Plus, the earrings are in both ears, so no "Google, which ear is the gay one?", these are just straight up cute femme dangly earrings with his favourite little dudes on.

More importantly, the colours he's repping are those of Lopporit Radio. He probably tunes in every night for his broadcasts :')

Mirrored sunglasses for the guy notorious for keeping thoughts and plans close to his chest and choosing deliberately to be enigmatic even when it serves zero purpose except for I guess gender affirming care. (The gender is Weird Bitch.)

I can't tell how I feel about those dad sandals. I suppose it depends if he's wearing them like a fashion model (brand new and clean with perfect pedicured feet) or if those are REALLY dad at the beach-like and, since I'm not a foot person, this for me is only a choice between "not off-putting" and "AURGH".

9/10 the proximity to Thancred hauls him up several points of misgivings I had, and the lopporit shout outs are killing me :')

I unlocked Y'shtola last and holy fuck I am a lesbian. I don't even recognise where those boots come from, so either a really expensive glam or something I just have not stumbled on. She has toe rings I think? And painted nails? I have no idea if the garter (?) is part of the boots glam or a custom thing as result of not recognising the boots and how much of them is normal. I feel like they customised a lot on her anyway - the back of her top has purple beads that match her staff (not dyable on the real piece)

and I think the necklace has to be part of the top instead of a separate necklace piece with the way it hangs, AND the bracelets are a glove piece with the original summer glam, but I assume they're layered with the false nails, also in the glove slot. All in all it's giving the sort of effort which is starting to creep up to what I'd expect from the modding community not the game. I mean, not THAT good but getting close. Baby steps towards what fandom can make :P

She really is god's favourite meow meow.

Anyway I can't really judge this fairly because it's really hot and I love her so I'm just going to give it 100/10 and move on. :)

how did I get a picture where Estinien looks like he's stooping to get in the frame...

The fact he has Azure Dragoon Blue Top and then Violently Nidhogg Fuchsia shorts is the colour theory that absolutely killed me. When he lights up during his burst and starts glowing pink all over his shorts are like. Taking him over like the eye once did I think.

love a guy who can embrace his past trauma and dress to match all that has passed before and all that he intends to do now (kill something large and tasty, grill it on the beach, fall asleep with a beer in hand until the waves come in and wake him up).

I gave him that wooden bracelet in the glam he has on my desktop screen so once again I'm feeling weirdly vindicated.

Other details: no ponytail despite the warm weather because he's got enough ventilation. The fact there's cactaurs on his shirt when he's on record for eating them is amazing. We should imagine he's wearing his jobstone like that pendant (since he's one of the only guys with a confirmed jobstone despite being the Guy Without A Job notoriously that one time.)

Unlike Thancred's hat and sunglasses combo, which seems fun and boisterous somehow, he seems the most walled off of all the sunglasses wearers even though he's not the most mysterious. The visor really helps make it a sort of wall. Maybe just because his terse upfront personality and somehow despite his clothes horse habits THIS amount of whimsy seems the most out of character at first glance, but he DOES look uncomfortable to me.

Somehow I find everything about this outfit excellent for his character but also like maybe he was forced into it, everyone cornering him and telling him the Scion Beach Party was a mandatory work event and he was not allowed to beg off of it and he did put some work in expressing himself but also is going to go find a much quieter corner to lurk in for the day, when not competing with Thancred (can't grill, loves it) for the barbeque (Estinien can grill, would only do it because the threat of Thancred doing it wrong is too high).

confused 7/10 mostly because I think Krile is blackmailing him and not because I don't love everything about this.

Here's how G'reenha Tia can still win -

Anyway here's the deducted point for tanking in flip flops (PERFECTLY acceptable BLM gear btw but he's Mr Versatile.)

(I joke but the main character of my novels is a flip-flop wearing menace who could and would tank in them)

Between the padlock and key necklace and the woven bracelet right after we all went feral over the Thavnarian bracelets for couples thing so recently (and Corvos is just across the water!) he's absolutely dripping cutie pie love interest coding yet again.

(Also yes I know the lock and key thing is very funny because we were introduced to him learning he was a fancy key to a big door.)

Gains a point back because the other green g'raha thing is I'm pretty sure people use this shirt glam because it kinda looks like it has weed on it.

Don't quote me on that, vibes only.

Anyway he came colour coordinated (with his original eye colour and hair colour not the bright Allagan dalamud red dye that goes with his normal outfit) so so precise and neat, like he's going to some sort of formal event, and even with flip flops he really does seem incredibly put together like the twins or Y'shtola, just for full outfit cohesiveness.

As someone who would hold G'raha's hand on the romantic gondola vibe, 10/10.

3 out of 10 and a huge cringe if you would not. He's got to stop Striving.

Hey it's the star of the show!! Adorable hairstyle out, cute plot-important earring on, and wearing her exact character colours but adorable beach wear :)

I love that she looks kind of like she went to the girls for advice and got the top from Y'shtola and the shorts from Alisaie, and she probably was very serious and stressed about getting this right even though there's no rules and no one's judging her -

oops.

Anyway the ballet shoes are adorable and go with all the cute picto spins and twirls :)

I think the strict colour scheme does speak to the slight lack of fleshing out she got so far in the story (we don't really have any real character reason that picto in particular spoke to her and this glam isn't one of the many fun takes people had on how to dress to meet that brief ). I don't think DT did more than just repeat that she's serious and sweet and trying really hard to get out of her shell and be more fun and creative and also she's been practicing dodging really hard she shouts mid-Trust combat (bless her). But ALSO getting out of the shell is really hard and she only found out everything and got some closure in the final level 100 quests so there wasn't really much to do with her after that.

This is like her First Non-Plot-Critical Whimsy Moment and losing the hood or any cat ears entirely (and there are perfectly functional cat ears to wear in game) is a good step considering we know she wears it precisely because she needed a sort of advance PR campaign to make her look cute and approachable before she opened her mouth and started bringing down the vibe (serious scary children are SO funny though and i love that for her). Having the same top as Y'shtola is a good thing for trying to make her less childish and have her trying to show that now as she takes this huge step out from the background. I mean, it still has a slight sense of her costuming herself and pushing herself out of comfort zones as she always does, but it's 100% in character so I adore it.

1000/10 because Krile is great and there's so much going on here and it's so fun when a character's whole personality is a costume and then they're like aurgh wait do I even want that??

[midniiights-garden]

Mizu realising she's in love/a lesbian [Headcanons!!]

(A/N: I feel like this is like... already a given but please remember that these are HEADCANONS!! She does not have a canon sexuality. And I know it's mostly the lesbians who haven taken over the show but my content is available for everyone to see and I wanted to remind everyone that I am not going to tolerate slander or trash talking because of a personal opinion. You are entitled to your thoughts and I am entitled to mine.)

Possible TWs!!: Mentions of sex and sexual encounters, M*kio (you cannot stop me from putting this man as a warning I hate him sm), Canon typical violence, Racisim, Homophobia, Mysogyny (did I spell that right??)

Firstly I wanna address her relationship with Mikio in order to fully understand my headcanons.

Personally I do not believe that Mizu actually "loved" Mikio in the romantic sense. She thought she was in love, but in the end it wasn't.

Speaking as someone with a lot of personal trauma regarding relationships myself I realised that I couldn't differentiate between romantic and platonic love. Basically, for me, all I saw was that someone was treating me nicely for once and now I'm attached to them. And for the longest time I thought that was what love was.

And I think Mizu experienced something similar.

Basically, when Mikio treated her like a fucking human being she was like "oh, hey this is nice. This is weird, but it's nice. So I guess I'm in love, right?"

Like, no, baby. You aren't. That's just called emotional trauma.

That's also why she thought she was straight for the longest time because she genuinely cannot tell when she likes someone romantically.

As I often restate it'll take a while for her to fully understand the extent of her emotions, but she'll get there.

Now onto the fluffier stuff :))

~~~

How does she realise she's in love? What's her reaction to it?

I think she gets hit with the realisation as if it were a train crashing into her.

It's just a normal evening, she's probably at a ramen shop with her future S/O with her and then as she's taking a bite of her ramen she looks over at you and thinks: "Huh... I wonder what it would be like if I got to hold them?"

And then it's just a record scratch moment for her where she's like wtf where did that come from.

It's either just normal domestic moment like I mentioned or her future S/O sparring with her (which may or not freak her out bc of the fucking Mikio incident).

But when Mizu successfully pins her S/O down they just laugh and smile, knowing Mizu would never hurt them on purpose.

That made Mizu's heart flutter more than anything Mikio had ever done for her.

She's going to be in denial about it for a long time. Like... a really, really long time. Cue the "but we're just friends"!

How does she react when she realises she's into girls?

Due to the internalized homophobia instilled within her as a child and other such thoughts she starts to think she may be going crazy.

She'll start to pull away out of fear, not truly understanding her emotions.

Which, of course, will hurt her future S/O and cause them to worry.

Seeing her future S/O so distraught kind of triggers something in her. She realises that there's nothing inherently wrong with her, that she's still a person and the person she likes is still a person and that there shouldn't be anything wrong with liking her S/O. She also just didn't like seeing you worry over her, it hurt her more than any blade that she's been stabbed with.

Now onto her actual physical attraction.

Once the whole emotional side of it is somewhat sorted in her mind she finds herself not so subtly staring at her S/O's tatas.

She doesn't strike me as someone with high libido or anything despite what I've seen a lot of headcanons say. But I think shes the kind of lover to enjoy getting her S/O off a lottttt

I don't believe she was ever really attracted to Mikio sexually but seeing her S/O's kimono slip off their shoulder to reveal some titty has her red and hot.

She likes that it's soft. She really likes the softness of her S/O's body.

~~~

(A/N: That's all!! I feel like I was terribly self-indulgent with this one but there are a lot of aspects in which I relate to Mizu with. Which is probably why I care a lot about representing her correctly. As usual, feel free to comment or send asks to my inbox!! I hope y'all enjoyed <33)

[chaengluva]

Don’t Be Fooled By The Pink

Regina George x Fem!Reader: 2.4k words.

Requested: No

Regina hasn’t laid eyes on you before but one day she noticed that you were feeling sad and she couldn’t help but feel bad for you, so Regina decided to he human for once.

WARNINGS: Slight mention of a bad life at home and bullying

You walked into class with your head down and your hoodie up. You tried your best to hide your face from the people that you knew would make fun of you for crying at school, but you couldn't help it. So much was going on in your life that you couldn't take it anymore.

You were so tired of being the second choice, in the eyes of everyone, everything you do is compared to what your sister does, if you get a B, you should do better but when you get an A, your parents blame you for cheating, but when its your sister, they treat her like she just found a cure to cancer.

Nothing like what happened this morning, it was the worst fight and your sister just let your parents attack you. Your mom went in to your room when you were sleeping, and being herself, she went threw all your stuff. She opened your note book, the one were you confessed your crush, on a girl.

You tried to tell her that you didn't like that girl anymore, and you told her that it was all just a phase (which is a lie), but you didn't want her to be mad at you.

It didn't work; she wasn't happy; she started yelling at you, which started you awake and made your father and sister rush in; they also yelled at you; and your sister just watched and smirked while it happened, which broke your heart.

Your mom told you to pack your stuff and not come home after school today, you felt so broken and you didn't know where do go, so that's why you were upset at school.

You look up for the first time, and you notice that Regina Geogre is staring at you. You sigh, looking away, knowing she is probally juding you for crying, when you look back you notice she is still looking at you, which makes you more embarssed.

You look away, then you feel a vibration on from your phone, you pull it out to check and you were really confused when it said that Regina had texted you through instagram.

@TheRegina_Geogre

Hey, I know we have never talked but why are you crying?

@Y/n.L/n_

Just personal reasons.

@TheRegina_Geogre

Do you want to talk about it?

Just leave the classroom; meet me in the janitors closet next to the classroom.

She didn't say anything else; she just got up and left. You were so confused about why Regina was being nice to you, but you didn't want to argue with her, so you just got up and followed her. You opened the door and saw Regina sitting down, doing her nails.

"Hey," you say, sitting down next to her. "So, why are you crying?" She asks, and you look down, saying, "Well, my parents kicked me out because..." You panicked, realising that she could also be homophobic, but you sighed, pretending not to care and saying, "I'm lesbian." You finish.

She pauses, looking at you. There was no shaking on her face; she was just quiet. "Oh." She said quietly, and you get up to leave, knowing she probably doesn't want to deal with you anymore, but she grabs your wrist and pulls you back down.

"Stay." She says, "Tell me more." You sigh, "Well I'm always second in my parents eyes, my sister can't do anything wrong, but I can't do anything right." She gives you an apologetic look, and pulling you in for a hug. "I get what your going through, I do."

You nod your head. The bell rings, meaning class is over, but none of you moved. It wasn't like your parents were going to do anything; you weren't going back.

You stayed the whole time in there until it was lunch time, and the two of you were hungry. You didn't think she wanted to eat lunch with you because of her reputation, so you quickly got up, not noticing that she tried to chase after you, but she lost you.

"Watch out, loser!" One of the jocks said he was throwing a football at you, making everyone around you laugh. You quickly tried to escape the sense, then you felt cold liquid drip down your body, and when you opened your eyes, you noticed people around you recording you and your sister pouring milk on you.

You left all your stuff and walked off. You shoved past people as they tried to trip you over and humiliate you even more. You walked until no one could see you, but you were still on campus.

Regina had been looking for you and was just deterred to go sit with her friends. As she walks to the table, she notices everyone's eyes on a phone, laughing at the video of you being bullied. This makes her mad.

She was about to sit down on the table, but Gretchen's voice stopped her. "I'm sorry, Regina. You can't sit with us." She says it loudly, and everyone looks up from their phones and puts their eye on the plastic table "What?" Regina asks with a small laugh. "You're wearing sweatpants. It's Thursday." Gretchen continues, and Regina rolls her eyes. "Whatever. Those rules aren't real."

"They were real that day I wore a vest." Karen says, and Regina rolls her eyes again. "Yeah, because that vest was disgusting!" Regina exclaims, and everyone goes quiet.

"You can't sit with us!" Gretchen yells. More silence. "These sweatpants are all that fit me right now." Regina whispers, not wanting many people to hear her.

"What do you think, Cady?" Gretchen asks Cady, and Regina looks at the strawberry blonde. She turns around with a smirk on her face and says, "Sorry, Regina. Rules are rules." She says it with a smirk in her voice. "Fine." She says this, turning away from the table. Everyone's eyes were on her, and she just rolled her eyes. "Take a picture, losers. It'll last longer." She says, walking away, throwing away her lunch as she goes.

She leaves the school, and she notices you sitting behind a tree, making her sigh. She walks up to you, kneeling down, pulling you in for a hug. "I'm sorry I wasn't there." Regina says she is picking you up and taking you back to her house.

The two of you did everything you could to distract you from what was going on in your life; you watched movies, talked, and she even showed you the burn book that she wrote about girls in the grade; you weren't in it, which you didn't know how to feel about.

"I told Gretchen not to put you in it, she wanted to." Regina says, You give her a confused look, "Why?" You ask, and she sighs, looking down and sighing, "Because I like you." Regina says, and you blush, not wanting to believe her if she is lying. She notices this and rolls her eyes, grabbing your neck and pulling you in for a kiss.

You kissed back, slowly changing your position on the bed so she was hovering over you, as you made out, you got lost, you forgot about everything and for once in your life you felt wanted. 

You opened your eyes, and you were shocked to feel Regina's arms around you. She was holding you close. You moved slightly, waking the girl up. She yawed before getting up and moving to her closest. She threw you some clothes to wear, not saying a word. "I need to get my status back." Regina says, nodding her head, "How come you only talked to me when you saw me crying?" You ask, making Regina sigh.

"I've always been so shy; I know that sounds stupid, me? Shy?" Regina says, giggling, making you smile back, and hugging her, "Thanks, Regina." You smile, letting go of Regina, grabbing the clothes she gave you, then changing, leaving Regina standing there with a stupid smile on her face.

When you finally got changed, you came out to see that Regina was now sitting on her bed, eating a kalteen bar, which made you confused. "Regina?" You ask, she hums, looking up and into your eyes. "You know those make you gain weight."

Her eyes go from really soft to angry. She spits the rest of the bar she was chewing out and grabs the burn book, putting Cady's name inside it. (You thought so.) "I'm kicking her out today." Regina says you just nod your head, not wanting to argue with her.

The two of you go to school and sit on the plastic table like nothing happened yesterday. Gretchen and Karen were happy that Regina finally told you about her feelings; her arm was wrapped around you possessively, and the two girls sat opposite you and started to talk.

Cady made her way to the table, and Regina looked at the girl with angry eyes. Cady had no idea that Regina knew about the scheme she pulled off, and she wasn't happy about it.

Cady was about to sit down, but Regina spoke up, "You're not allowed to sit here." Regina said, and Cady gasped, "Why not?" She asked with hurt in her voice. "Because I said so," Regina said, hoping that was enough for the strawberry blonde to get up and leave, but she didn't move.

"So you're replacing me with some sore loser?" Cady says, rolling her eyes. Gretchen and Karen's eyes go wide, and they tell Cady to run away with their hands, but she doesn't pick it up. Regina drops the cheese fry that she was holding in her hand, then stands up. "Excuse me?" Regina says, and the shorter girl smirks. "You heard me."

Regina chuckles, walking closer to the girl, showing the clear height difference between them, making Cady slightly regret what she said and backing away. "Y/N is not a loser." Regina says, and Cady nervously nods, making the blonde roll her eyes. "Y/N is prettier than you; she has a personality. You were nothing before you met me." Regina said, pushing down the girl.

The whole cafeteria was laughing at her, which made the blonde smirk and feel satisfied enough to sit back down. When she sat back down, she noticed you were eating her cheese fries. Usually she would be mad if someone ate her food, but now she felt worried. "Y/N?" Regina said, making you jump and quickly putting the fry down.

"Sorry for eating your food," you nervously say. The blonde giggles, shaking her head. "It's okay; you can have the rest of them." She smiles, and Gretchen and Karen stare at the girl in shock. Regina never shares her food, but she did with you.

She allows you to touch her hair and eat her food. Karen and Gretchen knew that she liked you, but you didn't expect the two of you to move this quickly.

"Regina?" Gretchen said, making the girl roll her eyes, and she looked over at Gretchen. "What?" She asked with bitterness in her voice. "I have to pee, do you?" Gretchen said, smirking, and Regina knew exactly what Gretchen was doing. She groaned, getting up and then following Gretchen into the bathroom.

"What do you want?" Regina asked, crossing her arms. Gretchen gulped. "Are you dating Y/N?" Gretchen asks, and Regina gasps, "Not yet." She smirks and then goes to leave, but Gretchen grabs her and says, "You should take her out tonight." Gretchen suits, and Regina stops in her tracks and turns back to face her.

"You know what? That's a really good idea." Regina smiles, leaving. Gretchen has a massive smile on her face. She finally feels seen by her best friend. Regina goes back to you, taking a deep breath. "Y/N," she said, grabbing your attention.

You looked up, with a smile on your face, asking, "Yes?" Regina takes a deep breath before asking, "Will you go out with me? On a date." You happily smile and nod quickly, and she smiles, pulling you in for a hug and then walking away.

The two of you girls went home later that day and got ready in different rooms. When you walked out and saw Regina, she looked amazing.

She took you out to this very fancy restaurant that was very expensive; you almost felt bad watching her pay. When the two of you got back home, you held each other close and watched movies.

When you woke up, Regina wasn't with you; she wasn't by your side, which made you confused. You asked her mum where she was, and she told you that Regina had gone to school already, which made you frown. You had to catch the bus.

When you got to school, it was insane. Every girl was attacking each other, and you didn't know why, but then people turned to look at you and started laughing. You were confused by what they were laughing about, but then you got a text from someone.

"Y/N is a slut who craves attention from girls because her parents don't give her any."

You felt tears come to your eyes, and you knew exactly who wrote this, and she told you that she wouldn't write your name in the book. You look up, and Regina is making eye contact with you. She is trying to say something, but you ignore it.

You rush into the bathroom and put your hands in your head, feeling the tears come through, thinking of how dumb you were to trust Regina George.

Just as you open the door, Regina comes in, and you look away. "Y/n." She says, You roll your eyes, "What?" Regina sighs deeply. "I didn't mean anything I wrote about you. I had to write it." Regina says, making you roll your eyes again. "What do you mean you had to?" You ask.

Regina looks down at the ground. "I didn't want you to get framed, so I wrote you and me in it," Regina confesses, and you look down. "Oh."

Regina pulls you in for a hug, praying that you will hug back, and thankfully, you do. "Let's skip the rest of the day." Regina asks, and you nod with a smile on your face.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hey, I really appreciate your answering sex ed questions and was hoping you might be able to help me out. Sorry for the long tmi I'm about to give but I don't know how to ask this except by listing out everything relevant I can think of.

I'm afab (cis-ish in the sense I don't particularly see myself as a woman but don't bother trying to get other people not to, but that isn't really important here) in my mid 20s and a virgin, and I don't know much about sex drive but what I do makes me feel like maybe there's something off about mine? I used to consider myself bi ace until I realised I did feel some degree of physical attraction to women that I don't to men so now I call myself a lesbian but the attraction I feel is still very... vague? Like, I'll see a pretty woman and get some kind of rush of feeling, but it's not really a particularly physical feeling of arousal (though I am autistic so it could be I just don't recognise it as physical because of interoception difficulties), more like... sorry if this is an inappropriate metaphor but. More like the urge to pet a really cute cat. I've made out with women and it felt vaguely nice (certainly nicer than with men which I've also done but it was awkward and vaguely uncomfortable) but no more than that. I don't get anything from my physical partners biting down on my neck or nipples or other common erogenous zones though I feel like they expect me to, and kissing is kind of nice but kissing with tongue feels awful. I'm not sure if I'd ever actually want to have full on sex, the thought of letting someone near my sex organs sounds unpleasant. I sometimes masturbate by rubbing my clit and there's a moment that feels like a climax where it gets really hard and sensitive and I used to think that was an orgasm but reading your recent description of an orgasm I'm actually pretty sure I've never had one. I've never had the urge to stick anything in my vagina, only tried it because I heard if it causes pain it might be a cause for medical concern (it didn't cause pain - it felt kinda nice, not anything special though and certainly not something I'd do without prompting). When I masturbate there's only one specific non sexual scenario that gets me off (though maybe about once a year at most I can successfully get off to sexual scenarios with fictional characters but never with real people and it isn't as effective). I used to masturbate more than I do now (I know it dropping off suddenly can be a cause for medical concern but it wasn't sudden, just spikes of activity getting gradually shorter and rarer - I can think of months when I'd do it every night to fall asleep but those are very much outliers scattered across the years rather than my baseline, which is occasionally doing it absentmindedly while falling asleep but very rarely intensely and on purpose). I probably should have sought out more sex ed at some point but sex just never felt very important to me.

Anyway I guess my question is. Is all this normal? Am I actually ace after all? Do I just have a low sex drive? Is any of this cause for medical concern? Do you have any idea how I might be able to actually get an orgasm, if what I thought was that actually wasn't?

hi anon,

all of this is incredibly normal. what I'm hearing is that you kind of like kissing women and aren't particularly interested in sex? that's awesome. kissing women is great, strongly recommend, and if that's all you're interested in then that's just dandy. no need to pretend to enjoy anything just because a partner expect you to; a polite "no thanks" will suffice, followed by kicking your partner to the curb if they don't listen to the no.

whether or not you call yourself asexual is up to you, that's none of my business and I can't pick for you. there actually isn't a secret barcode hidden somewhere on your body that will reveal your Real True Sexuality, you can just pick whatever words you want that kind of get the gist at any given time. would calling yourself asexual feel nice or helpful to you in anyway? if so, awesome! does it not appeal to you at all? okie dokie! don't do that then.

literally nothing you have described sounds like something that would be cause for medical concern, unless I missed something that's regularly causing you any physical pain or discomfort.

I think focusing on orgasms isn't that important, actually, and you can actually just touch yourself in whatever way you want for as long as it feels good, and then stop when it doesn't!

[sistersorrow]

Finished Harrow the Ninth a couple hours ago

I'm not a reviewing type, so I'm just gonna include a bunch of things that made me have reactions and other miscellaneous things about my experience with the book

I don't care what Gideon says, the waters may be choppy, but the Harrow x Ianthe ship ain't sunk yet

TV Tropes is a godsend for me, cause it wasn't until I read the Foreshadowing page that I remembered a bunch of details I'd completely forgot about

I didn't bother to actually google how you pronounce Ianthe until 300 pages into the second book

People sold Gideon the Ninth as "lesbian necromancers in space" but Harrow the Ninth is the one where Harrow and Ianthe are both down horrendous

I had a vague inkling that The Locked Tomb was set in our future just because there were nine houses on nine planets and the Ninth House sounded like Pluto, but I did not expect this to be all but confirmed through a 10,000 year old immortal necromancer referencing the "It's for church honey" Facebook post and God himself mentioning None Pizza Left Beef

This does not however explain not 10,000 year old Gideon referencing Llamas in Hats

No one is allowed to say they Fucked Nasty Style anymore unless it involved cutting off your partner's arm and replacing it with a necromanticly animated bone one

The author confirmed on Reddit that partway through writing that scene she realised how sexually charged it felt and ran with it

My pronouns are She/ cause I'll never be Her (toxic immortal lich wife Ianthe, who killed a man and ate his soul to attain unlimited power and get her face on posters)

The author has stated that Ianthe is a very intentional Draco in Leather Pants character with the core differences being that she's a woman and as a sense of humour, which is why she is in fact Best Girl

I was left wondering if I'd imagined all the memes being referenced cause TV Tropes didn't make mention of a single one, so I checked the Locked Tomb subreddit to make sure I had not performed The Work on myself

If there are any Homestuck references, I didn't notice, cause I have expunged most of my knowledge of it

Dad jokes are the pinnacle of all humour

The Emperor is really bad at gaslighting

Harrow may have died with the last thing she ever saw being a nudie mag that doesn't exist, which is just hilarious

Ianthe did everything wrong, and that's why she's the best

Reading this book has reminded me I'm very bad at picking up on foreshadowing, hence scrolling through TV Tropes right after finishing the book

That threesome is the most uncomfortable I've been in weeks, which makes it good writing

I'm probably gonna read the short stories next then start Nona the Ninth sometime next week

[hannahssimblr]

I spend three hours wandering around the estate looking for Goose. I've checked every front garden, every hedge and flower bed and under every car, looked inside bins and up trees by the time I'm forced to contend with the fact that I haven't confronted the railroad tracks yet. I don't. I never pluck up the courage.

I can’t fathom it, being the one to find him there, sweet Goose with his little kitten paws and soft pewter fur. This thought that I hadn’t even considered until Michelle spat it at me is tormenting me now as I forlornly wander the evening streets, calling out the name that I’m not even sure he knows to answer to yet. 

I stumble upon Jen in a little park we used to drink in when we were fourteen. She’s been out looking too, evidently, but has had enough and is sitting on the ground gazing out over the last russet streaks of sunset over Dublin Bay. 

“Have you given up?” I ask her. Her eyes are clouded with sadness 

“I have a feeling he’s gone, Jude,” she says. I feel a lump forming in my throat. “He mightn’t be. He might come back, you know, cats are known to show up after being away for days, weeks, months even,” this is the sort of bargaining a person who refuses to accept the obvious truth gets too involved with, and the kind I’ve been doing with myself the whole afternoon, thinking that maybe if I imagine Goose’s return with enough conviction I will magic him home again, but Jen, for once does not match my idealism.

“He probably doesn’t know where his home is yet, he’s too new.”

“Yeah,” I shift some loose gravel with the toe of my shoe. “Jen, I feel so awful.”

“I know,” she says, and holds her arms out to me to pull me to the ground and wrap them around me, “It isn’t your fault, it could have happened to any of us.”

“I ruined the entire day with my stupidity.”

“Shh, stop,” gently fingers stroke my hair at the nape of my neck, “you just made a mistake, it’s human.”

“Did I ruin your date?”

She pauses, “It’s okay, I don’t think she realised it was a date, and it's probably for the best.” 

The wind rustles through the trees around the park, and I feel chilled with the knowledge that change is coming. The school year is ending soon and now the future lies unavoidably ahead of me, a path completely untrodden. 

“You’ll find someone else to take to the debs,” I tell Jen, peering at the side of her face as her short crop of chestnut hair is backlit by the sunset. “You should have been the first person to get a date anyway.”

She gives me a half smile, unconvinced, “there are like, four lesbians in our year including me.”

“Out lesbians,” I point out, “You never know.”

“When I go to college it will be better,” she says firmly, “school is just destined to be shit, romantically, I mean.”

“In all ways, I think.”

She just laughs. 

“This stuff is bullshit anyway.”

“What is? Love?”

I rub my arms where goosebumps are rising with the cold. I should have worn a jumper. “Yeah, you’re not missing out on much.”

A silence follows, one that feels deliberate, but I venture into it anyway, “Michelle and I had a bad fight earlier.”

“I heard.”

“Us shouting?”

“Mm.”

“Sorry.” I wipe my nose which is running from the cold with the back of my arm. “It was terrible, we both said awful things.”

She just circles her hand on my knee in a vague gesture of comfort.  

“Sometimes it feels like she’s trying to hurt me, you know what I mean? It’s like she has all of this bad stuff stored up that she wants to, like, unleash. It’s so vicious. It seems like she really wants to dig her nails in and leave a mark on me, and then I get so defensive, like, because talking it out doesn’t work, I have to shout, and I have to be horrible too so that she’ll even react to me.”

“We all say things we regret when we’re upset.”

“Yeah, but it’s so destructive. I come away from it all feeling like shit. Like, this isn't who I am, I’m not a person who fights. At least I don’t want to be. I don’t want to be up there saying these things to her, but I can’t stand there and let her say them to me either.”

“Yeah.”

“And I worry a lot about what things are going to look like after this year is over, like, with college and stuff,” even mentioning it makes my stomach feel tight, “like, um, how she wants us to live together and all.”

“And you’re nervous about that?”

I sigh, “Well, I don’t know, it makes sense to do it, right? She thought we could get a little place near NCAD, and we’ve been looking at houses online, and… I don’t know. The idea of being around her all of the time, like, twenty-four-seven, sharing a bed, eating every meal together, walking to college, it makes me feel claustrophobic, and then I worry that if I feel that way now, how am I going to feel when I’m actually doing it? Surely it’s not supposed to feel so terrible, right?” I prompt her when she doesn’t respond, “Jen? What do you think?”

She pauses for a long moment, toying with the aglets on the end of her boot laces. “I think that you’re asking me for an opinion I’m not prepared to give you.”

“...right.”

“We agreed, I agreed with you both that I’d never talk to one about the other. It’s not fair on me and I don’t want to feel stuck in the middle of it.”

“But-”

“You’re both nice people and I love you both so much, but when you are together you are absolutely horrible. That’s all I want to say.”

I don't know how to respond to that, so I don't, I just sit in bad feelings and wish for the millionth time that my brain was normal enough to make good choices on its own and not beg them from other people.

I sniff again, though this time I’m not sure if it’s just because of the cold. “So, um, the acceptance deadline for those other colleges is coming up.” 

“The foreign ones?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you still going to turn them down?”

“I promised Michelle that I would.” 

Jen’s shoulders slump, all of her does, like someone has let the air out of her, but she just says, “Alright.”

I feel the teeth of my genuine desperation for her opinion, her approval gnawing at me. I just want the sage words of advice she’s withholding from me, “Is it a mistake? Like, if I reject their offers? Would that be the stupidest thing I ever did?”

“I don’t know.”

“I worked hard, you know? I really put everything I had into those applications, I gave them the best that I had and they loved it, they said really nice things about me in the letters, and sometimes, like, I think I’ll die, or something, if I don’t leave Dublin. But then there’s Michelle,” I fist the front of my hair in my hand, “and the things at home, and I don’t know what the right thing is, whether it’s hurting myself or hurting everyone else…”

“Jude,” Jen suddenly grabs hold of my face and forces me to look into her eyes, “you have to do what feels right, okay? I’m not going to tell you what to do. Like, just… you need to fucking search within or whatever.”

“Uh huh. What does that entail?” 

“I dunno!” She lets me go and stands up, brushing dirt from the back of her jeans, “C’mon, it’s cold, we should go home.”

“Uh, I was kind of hoping you’d be able to solve me, actually.”

“No, this time you can solve yourself. C’mon, up!” She presents her hand to me and I let her haul me onto my feet. 

“Ugh, Jen,” I say, feeling myself sinking back into a melancholy hole again, but she links my arms and brusquely walks me toward the playground gates with all the pep of a middle aged Sunday morning power walker. “You know what? I think we could both do with something nice to make us feel better.”

“What do you mean ‘something nice’?

“Like, I dunno, an ice cream or something.”

“What time is it? It must be after nine.”

“Yeah, so? I was thinking of that place with all the weird flavours, do you remember that?”

“Yeah, but it’s all the way in town. Effort.”

“You can drive, can’t you?”

“You want me to drive? Jen I hate driving.”

“I think you’ll do it for me.”

“Why’d you think that?”

She eyes me sideways, “After what you put me through today, hm?”

“That's manipulation.”

“No, it's payback.”

“Fine. I’ll go get the car.”

“Really?”

“Yes! Come on, before I change my mind.”

Beginning // Prev // Next

[charmac]

hey so just curious, i'm asking this as someone who pretty strongly believes that dennis is gay, but wants to understand other perspectives. so it seems like the common consensus of a lot of sunnyblr is that dennis is bisexual but dee is a lesbian. so i was just wondering about those headcanons, since it seems like lesbian dee and gay dennis have sort of similar trains of logic behind them (heterosexuality = societal power). just need to let you know that i love your blog and i didn't mean for this to come across as confrontational, but i just wanted to explore ideas which are different from my own. thank you xoxo

For sure, and this doesn't come across as controversial at all lol I love discussing this stuff and that you're interested in hearing my perspective means a lot tbh

(Just to preface, I wrote most of this while high and watching baseball, but that's when my brain works best so not to worry)

So as for the common consensus of "Bi Dennis, Lesbian Dee" in the wider Fandom, I think a lot of that is rooted in the idea that the Gang are the "letters" of LGBT, so to speak. Not to say that's a bad thing, but just that a lot of people kinda like that "headcanon" as, for as far as canon is concerned, both of their sexualities are currently still ambiguous and this works and makes sense, so I think a lot of the fan-art and text posts/tweets/whatever veer that way.

Past that idea, I'm not actually sure what the majority of the Fandom thinks of Dee's canon sexuality? While right now I assume lesbian Dee would win, I am actually kinda surprised how few people voted gay Dennis (so far) in his canon sexuality poll, so I think a Dee version of that poll might be a good follow up to answer this...

Though the difference in what we see in Dee and Dennis' portrayals of their sex lives is what I think leans people more toward Bi Dennis and Lesbian Dee:

On Dennis: There's a point we're at with him where he.. has a system for men. He's not in denial about fucking guys, he's probably currently having sex with men (well clearly he's having (e)sex with one), he might have been sleeping with men the entire goddamn time, but he's still been pursuing women and drooling over breasts. He finds women (their bodies, really) sexually attractive. And for as much as the idea of inherently having power over women drives him, it's well established that the use of his Systems is what really gets him off, and he has one to manipulate and control men (and he's had it for awhile)... I think if Dennis wasn't sexually attracted to women, he would have just stopped—because he's clearly had no romantic interest in a woman ever in his life (briefly mistaking Maureen for something along those lines and realising he doesn't want it). I think there's a complete absence of romance in his sex life, full stop, and his life almost completely... with the exception of the fact that he has a life partner (whom he goes on dates with, financially supports, apparently now shares a bed with, etc)... But he's still gets off to and/or with women (at least that's what RCG write every now and then).

(And on the topic of writing, I think maybe in some ways for me, Bi Dennis over gay Dennis theory is due to the coding just being more obvious?... If an Italian man wants to eat a sandwich... to the paralleled Systems being the reverse of each other, giving prostate orgasms to Mac one episode and then desperate to see huge fake tits the next...)

On Dee: Season 6 made it pretty clear she's duping men into sex, and her relationship with Bill Ponderosa speaks volumes. But while she was sleeping with men just to give them low ratings in Group Dates, she was only spurred to that point because she was rejected by a guy she thought she was seeing. Then Goes to Hell reestablishes Dee is pressuring men into sex using insinuations, clearly devoid of romance. PTSDee is interesting, because Dee is acting on scorn, but it's not that the guy she slept with didn't want to see her again, but that he insulted her game. Then, Time's Up says a lot more, because it's quite literally telling you Dee slept with her (arguably best) friend, this guy she does love as a friend, and still ended up doing what she does to all the men she sleeps with (and destroying their relationship), using them. By Season 16, she hasn't had a care for a boyfriend in years, but she's sleeping with men if there's date-rape drugs in the picture. I think it's made clear she has no romantic interest in men, this is pure (fucked up) sexual pleasure.

The difference with Dee in canon (which I think is pretty clear) is that she doesn't have the "other sex option" that Dennis canonically explores. There's nothing to show us that she's even entertaining the idea of sleeping with women, so it's easily interpreted that she's a repressed lesbian experiencing comphet. Once she has sex with a woman for the first time, men will be completely gone from the picture. As an interpretation and hope for Dee's character, I would be inclined to agree, but honestly I don't believe RCG have been/are writing Dee's sexuality as a lesbian, but as Dennis' parallel. So if they're going to keep giving her plots and writing that she's interested in men the way Dennis is interested in women, I'm personally inclined to believe she's canonically sexually interested in men (as objects? lol).

I 100% agree with your idea that their heterosexuality comes from this place of "sex with (control over) the opposite sex gives me power," but I don't necessarily see it devoid of sexual attraction (as they love to hammer that stuff in), just romance (for as surface level as "empathy" would be)

For me, the intention of the writing holds a lot of weight (and maybe I should loosen up a little lol), which is why I'm parked where I am, but if the majority of people in the Fandom do see Dee as a lesbian while still believing Dennis is sexually interested in women in some way, I think it's because, while Dennis and Dee are shown to experience sexual attraction (and hetero sex) in similar ways, they don't exhibit homosexual attraction the same way, and the interpretation of that in their plots and characterisation leads to more people seeing Dennis as bi and Dee as a lesbian.

But honestly I'm just speaking on my own thoughts, idk how many people would agree, will def run a poll on Dee's sexuality tomorrow.

Let me know your thoughts. I'm really interested in hearing back on this!

[silent-words]

Yayyyy I love your game idea for BG3 city! If you’re taking asks, I’d love to read your thoughts about Gale’s school, the one he went to as a child. Maybe that’s where it was discovered he was a prodigy?

Maybe I’ll join in and tag you, too!

I'm sorry it took me so long to answer. I wanted to make it a fic, but then I realised I can only make a headcanon. And there will also be a lot of self-insert (because my school years felt like hell, I was happy to enter my Uni).

A little bit of lore first. As we know, Gale attended the Blackstaff Academy in Waterdeep (he says about it in the Arcane Tower). According to the Forgotten Realms Wiki and other sources Blackstaff is both a school and a university. Only the magically talented students are accepted as apprentices there, and they are at first taught by senior students (probably at the age of university students) and only after a few years they start being taught by professors. So future sorcerers and wizards spend more years in the Blackstaff tower than people do in school IRL. It's like a boarding school and a university campus combined, you can spend up to a couple of decades there.

We also know that Elminster first met Gale when the latter was 8 years old. Maybe it was the age Gale was accepted as an apprentice at Blackstaff. He was young, upset with his own abilities and very talented as a mage. Children at school can be pretty much evil, when it comes to relationships between them. I can picture Gale as a shy, naive person at first. Other children made fun of him both because they all thought they were talented and because he was always "lost in thought". They needed to call him twice or thrice to respond to them. Of course it annoyed everyone and made him an outsider. Maybe he was desperate to have a friend and prove himself in this community, so that he stole the Blackstaff (the staff of the very first headmaster, Khelben Blackstaff himself) and opened a portal to Limbo. /the story with the portal is also from the Arcane Tower dialogue/

In my view he only came to be respected by his peers when he reached the age when apprentices started receiving tutelage from professors and teaching the younger students. That's where, I think, Gale got his experience as a teacher (in the Weave scene he tells the character "I know" if they mention that he is a good teacher). I have a headcanon that his best friend from Blackstaff was a lesbian dragonborn, but she got jealous when he became the Chosen of Mystra, and they parted ways. But that character is only in my head.

We also know that Gale had romantic partners before Mystra. In my opinion he was good-natured, funny and handsome in his late teens and early twenties, and that made him a desirable goal for romance. He most probably liked the attention which he had thrived for in his childhood, so he had a lot of trysts and affairs with fellow Blackstaff apprentices of his age (of all genders and sexes, of course). Yet these romances were not meaningful enough for him to remember them and affect his life. His first serious long term affair was with Mystra, but I think it started after he graduated from Blackstaff.

Even when he was the centre of attention, he was still the weird guy envied for his talents and despised for his vast knowledge. He did not make any bond with his peers (or that bonds were shattered later on), so he had no anchor in the material plane to stop him from pursuing the Goddess of Magic.

That's what I can say on the subject right now. It's very self-indulgent (apart from the "centre of romantic attention" part), because I generally project a lot of myself in Gale. Nevertheless I hope it is interesting to read.

[s4pphic-sh3nan1gans]

hi! the bokris yapping never ends, so i'm here again 🥰 what types of stories about bokris do you enjoy the most? maybe some fave tropes or dynamic or kinks or plot points you enjoy reading about (the "creative differences" for example lmao or smth like that)? maybe you'd like to read something about them but it's not been written by anyone yet?

OOOOOO these are interesting questions!!!

I have to think about this for a minute lowkey 😭 honestly I'll read pretty much anything bokris-related, and I'm sure I must have read about 95% of the bokris fics on ao3. but as for my absolute favourite tropes, this is what I can come up with:

any variation of first kiss/getting together/confession of feelings - maybe I'm a bit basic for this one but I'm a sucker for reading about how they go from casual flirting to serious flirting to falling in love, and how the lines are blurred in between.

friends to lovers - again, basic 😅 but I never get tired of reading about them slowly falling for each other over the years.

enemies to lovers - now this one works perfectly when paired with the distortion saga or the creative differences saga. the drama, the conflicting feelings... AAAAA!!! I eat that shit UP!

mutual pining/miscommunication/idiots in love - this is an absolutely lethal combo but I kinda love it for bokris. both of them being extremely dense and not realising that the other has feelings for them fits them perfectly. it makes me want to bonk their silly little heads together.

teasing - in every sense of what this means, either sexually or non-sexually. and it's pretty versatile too: Bojan could be teasing Kris because he wants to see him flustered or to get a rise out of him, or Kris could be teasing Bojan because he's been far too cocky lately and could do with being taken down a few notches 🤭 basically, I like to read about them bickering or being a little mean to each other and using it as their flirting.

okayyyyy, and now some of my favourite kinks to read for them 😇 I have to say I'm a top!Kris bottom!Bojan truther, but only because that seems to be what fits most of my own personal headcanons 😭 I do enjoy reading all dom/sub variations between them so I'm definitely speaking broadly here for all of these:

praise kink - works for either of them, although you can't tell me that Bojan, golden retriever personified, doesn't have one of the biggest praise kinks in the world.

hair-pulling - all I'll say is that I'm sure there's many uses for Kris growing his hair out... (wow, I sure am doing a good job of "speaking broadly" about these 😭)

choking - I mean... we've all seen that video, right?

exhibitionism - sometimes, they can't keep their hands off each other, even in their rehearsal space. and I'm sure they wouldn't mind a small audience........

restraints - idk man I just think it's hot 😭 and it works pretty well with their dynamic.

and finally!!! the thing I'd really love to see more of is genderbent bokris as lesbians. there are a few fics (and, um... I confess I was writing one myself, which I am determined to finish at some point because I made a promise to myself 😭) but honestly? there should be more. they would be so hot as lesbians 🥰

so, there we are! I definitely rambled too much here (I can't help myself 😅) but I hope I answered your questions, anon! <3 there's loads more stuff too that I've probably forgotten, but these are the main things that I thought of straight away :)

[dnpbeats]

No but actually on the topic about the fuchsia phone case joke. I sometimes find it so hard to reconcile the images and videos of them then, with a)the two idiots we know now, but also just the two people we now understand them to have been at the time.

I see dan making a slightly off colour joke about phils phone case looking gay, and then i think the scared closeted 20yr old, trying to desperately figure himself out, and qhen i try to match them up, in some ways it makes so much more sense and in others it feels like my brain is short-circuiting.

I guess I just always wonder what those jokes and comments actually meant to them at the time. When I first started watching them, way back in 2015, I always understood the jokes they made as being in the same context as when my straight peers/friends made them. Misinformed but not malicious. As coming from the perspective of a straight person who didnt really think about what they were saying. But now obviously we have context, and now im a full raging lesbian myself, who similarly made gay jokes/comments when I was still in the closet, and I'm just starting to realise what mustve been going on in their heads. Like, im not saying the fuschia phone case comment was some desperate desire to be free and open or whatever, it was a joke and it wasnt a particularly deep one, but there is an added layer to it. Dnp laughed for more than just the fact that the 'fuchsia phone case looks gay'. They laughed bc they knew who they were, they were making fun of the whole 'having a purple phone case means your gay' concept in the first place, and they were just two closeted 20-somethings, existing in a world that wasnt ready for them yet. And yeah it was just a stupid joke, but thinking about it too much has made me a little emotional so here we are.

Hi!!! I totally understand this. It’s been wild going back and watching their content with the knowledge we have now. Like I, as most people did, presumed they were queer before they came out. But it’s absolutely a different experience thinking that and knowing that. While I was watching ditl it hit me that like. They were a closeted couple while filming that, and that’s not speculation, Dan confirmed that. And it kind of hit me in a way I can’t describe, but honestly part of it did make me sad. Just like, knowing what it must’ve been like for them. And I totally get what you’re saying about the gay joke. Like for them obviously part of it was like “oh haha making a gay joke when we’re gay!” But it’s also like… making a gay joke because you’re closeted and that’s as close as you can get to publicly being yourself. And even then, whatever the exact joke was, they cut out part of it. Which honestly was probably a good call lmao but, yeah. I agree that specific joke wouldn’t have been some like grand moment in their lives or that it’s that deep at the end of the day. But it’s just knowing that things/jokes like that were probably a regular occurrence and for a while that was like what they had yk? Making gay jokes and then cutting them out, because they didn’t want them to be misconstrued but maybe bc they hit a little too close to home

And now look at them. Joking about eating jizz on the gaming channel for all the world to see

[enbysiriusblack]

dorlene july event, day 7- books

"I don't think I can read."

Lily turned to Marlene with a frown, "I think you can read, I think you would just rather be tearing up the pages of the book and squashing them into little paper balls to then see how far across the library you can throw them."

Marlene stared at the pages of the charms textbook in front of her, resisting the urge to to exactly what Lily had said.

"Yeah", Marlene sighed, flopping her head onto the table, "But I still don't understand it anyway... You know you're so smart, Lily. And you can concentrate so well, and get all your work done days ahead of time and you really understand all the concepts and theories, especially in charms, and you'd be able to explain it all so well."

Lily glanced up from her own work, "Do you want me to help you?"

Marlene grinned, passing her textbook to Lily.

Lily skimmed through the page Marlene was already on, jotting down key points onto a piece of paper before turning the page and pausing, eyes stuck on the bottom right corner.

Marlene leaned over, "What's wrong?"

"Is this your textbook?"

"Course it is- what did I spill pumpkin juice on it again or something? I totally ruined my potions book last term and my parents made me buy another one with my pocket money but I had spent all my money on that new guitar like a day beforehand and so I stole Meadowes' book and she found out and pushed me in the lake. But I didn't really mind, other than the fact I had my defence homework in my pocket and it got totally soaked, because the water made my shirt see-through and Meadowes fucking blushed and ran away and it was like the best day ever."

Lily slowly looked up, "What are on about? No- look, someone's wrote something in it for you."

"Really?" Marlene snorted, climbing over the table to see.

Marlene read the small, scratchy writing.

You're the most irritating person I have ever met and I'm definitely in love with you

"Well, shit."

Lily smiled, clutching Lily's shoulders, "Someone likes you!"

"Yeah, well", Marlene huffed, sliding back into her seat, "Maybe I don't like them."

"I wonder who it is?" Lily hummed, glancing around the room in thought.

Marlene folded her arms, "I mean they called me irritating, what sort of love confession includes insults!"

"It's in your charms notebook so it'll be someone from our class", Lily ignored Marlene, "A Gryffindor or Slytherin in our year then."

"And- And they vandalised my property!" Marlene continued, ignoring Lily in turn.

Lily tapped the table in thought, "It's not one of the boys or Mary or Em, I know all of their handwriting. Which means it's got to be a Slytherin, discluding Severus it's not his handwriting either."

"And what do they even mean by 'definitely', you can't be definitely sure about anything! I mean I'm pretty sure I'm a witch named Marlene but you know what? I'm not definite. I could be wrong, I don't know!"

"I don't think it's a boy, I mean you're pretty out as a lesbian so they should know they don't have a chance, and you've never really talked to any of them for them to know that you're irritating or to be in love with you."

"And why can't they just say that to my face? I mean it's not that hard, you just open your mouth and talk, I do it constantly!"

"But it's the same with the slytherin girls really, you don't really talk to any of them. I mean other than-"

"Whoever this person is, they're probably such an arsehole-"

Lily and Marlene both glanced to each other, realisation clear on their faces.

"It's Dorcas Meadowes."

[elizabethrobertajones]

I wish to hear the tales of siren Lizzy driving men into rocks with disinterested lesbian asexuality! Those sound like fun stories!

Oh my god, like, the most recent event, I think I manic pixie dreamgirled a dear friend, who we'd met in weird circumstances (he and his brothers were notable town characters being small business owners with a visible presence and themselves as a trio came across a lot stranger than they actually were. A bestie of mine met his brother and married him and he's the nicest most normal guy, so his brother (much nerdier) became a sort of friend-brother-in-law and we became friends, but I'd reacted in shock and awe to my friend having met her husband by chance since I recognised them in a very silly way and when I was a teen had used their appearance for characters in a story on account of them being Notable Strange People In Town and I'd thought they were only background characters in my life forever until then and therefore fair game to take inspiration from.)

I was just being me at him (chatty, fun, extremely weird, trying not to admit I'd basically made up spy fanfiction about him and his brothers a decade earlier) and he also was sort of weird in a benign normal nerdy way so I didn't think there was anything strange, until I realised he was coming around regularly and bestowing quite large gifts and writing really really really nice birthday cards specifically to me (easy to tell when you're a twin and your twin also gets a present and card from him) which made me start to realise he miiiight have a crush on me, and then I thought about it some more from his perspective of meeting me and how I can be rather full on in person and he was a wallflower who rarely got any attention especially compared to his two more conventionally normcore brothers, and realised I'd accidentally enabled him up to the point that I briefly considered just marrying him to avoid the embarrassment if he did proposition me. But I sort of gently ghosted and just toned back the interaction to group chats and collective meetings and while I feel sort of bad and miss hanging out with a friend who is in town, it was probably very sensible because he was way too nice to accidentally destroy through awkwardness :P

since I'm biromantic and demisexual I do end up crushing on guys and giving anyone a really long time to shoot their shot because I can't tell if I'm just mildly crushing and it could be more or if it's going to turn into more but it is Always a catastrophe and makes me feel More Gay Than Ever in the aftermath and I know now after so many failed attempts I am Not Meant to date at the very least any guy who is excessively cis, het, shy, or normcore in interests because I just end up in a spiral about not matching them in any way whatsoever despite my surface ability to start crushing, and it causes an enormous communication gulf that they are never equipped to handle and I always end up feeling like I'm trying to explain myself to a brick wall until I give up and things fall apart, because in the same time I was giving them a run up, they had already fallen completely in love or else thought we should already be having tons of sex and were hurt I wasn't interested yet and couldn't SAY that so they get passive aggressive and super weird and - aaurgh. Sometimes I just want to be friends, also, but that can also be seen as interest from some people so then they hit a double brick wall where I only ACCIDENTALLY led them on and I sometimes don't even know myself which one it was if I did crush on them at least a little at first.

I do catch myself thinking sometimes that I should just shave my head to try and get some sort of visible barrier up XD

[mostofthingsmostofthetime]

My final thoughts about season 1 of Heartstopper

Was surprised by how little they changed from the books (despite being told as much by a very helpful fan).

It just felt like there was....more. Not saying Alice is a bad writer (she literally created one of my newest obsessions & is helping make the show), but the graphic novels are almost exclusively Nick & Charlie focused. Which isn't bad, persay. I literally love them as individual characters & as a couple, but it definitely makes the story feel "smaller" & a little rushed at times, to me (but I know she originally created Heartstopper when she was very young so I think stuff like that are very understandable flaws) & I'm sure tons of people don't have a problem with the pacing of the books & might even find the show too slow or "bloated'. I, however, personally appreciate the changes made (minus not getting to witness Nick whine to his mum about his boyfriend not being allowed to come on their holiday because that was hilarious). Most storylines were neither dragged out for too long nor so quickly resolved that things ended on an anticlimatic note, with most characters being given enough time, with the amount of episodes they have, for characters to doubt/second guess themselves & argue like obviously they're teens & are going through difficult stuff (I know haters wanna act like this series is "too perfect, that it's boring," but most of the characters are lgbtq+ & are shown facing at least some kind of struggle because of that). Which just gives the series a little more time to breathe. I think this is clearly shown/felt with the supporting cast.

The big moments in the book seem to be solely Nick or Charlie's. The other characters, much more secondary, only getting snippets of focus/attention tacked on at the end of volumes or their situations already being pretty much established by the time they're introduced. Theres little discovery for them, no getting to see the stirings of them first developing/realising a crush. Instead, Elle & Tao already like each other (even if they won't admit it) & their friend group already knows. Tara is just tottally open about being a lesbian from the get go (seemingly suffering no scrutiny) when we meet her in the book & so we never get Darcy feeling bad about how the change in their relationship is difficult for the person she loves.

I guess it's so we, the audience, can strictly focus on the development of the Nick x Charlie relationship. Which again isn't bad, but I definitely prefer it this way. Changes the serise from having two leads & the rest just being supporting characters to it feeling much more like an ensemble cast of genuine friends who all have their own lives & issues to sort out.

Also I actually kinda love the addition of Imogen like yeah she was annoying with the 'who your texting' thing & just how oblivious she was about Nick clearly not being into her (she over came that though, thank god) but even when she was at her most problimatic (I'm an ally) she was at least hilarious. I've said 'Come on Nickalous' to myself at least once a day since I watched that episode & you're gonna have to rip that habit from my cold, dead hands! In conclusion, some of you are a little too eager to hate on teen girls sometimes (like, at worst, she's cringey). I do hope she's more respectful in regards to LGBTQ+ stuff moving forward of course, but like character development is also a thing & unlike Harry & Ben (self haiting though he obviously is) she wasn't shown to be an actual bully. I just think the internet, which woobifies toxic male characters on the regular, shouldn't judge her as harshly as I've seen some people do (though I will admit a lot of them are probably doing so mostly as a joke, its just a little weird hearing adults refer to someone who's supposed to be like 15, as a bitch/slut). Anyway, rant over, lol.

Can't wait to continue this lovely series.

[chaengluva]

Defend

Reneé Rapp x Fem!Reader: 1.3k words

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Being Reneé Rapp's girlfriend had its advantage's, I mean she's hot, protective and tall, what lesbian wouldn't want her. At times like this , you start to notice all the negatives. Since mean girls came out, a lot more people are simping for Reneé, that doesn't bother you but the hate you get does.

Reneé is very proud and open with her relationship with you, some fans support you but there are many that don't, they always leave comments on you posts that say Reneé deserves someone better, making you feel slightly insecure. You knew that wasn't her fault, and you can't blame them for finding her attractive.

She was currently on tour, and you misses her more then ever, you called every night but it was never the same, you texted her a lot but it just made you feel further apart. Some nights, your emotions got the best of you and started to cry, being alone in your bed, eating dinner alone, and you're one year anniversary was coming up and you knew that would be hard to spend alone too.

You thought she was mad at you because she hasn't been responding to your calls on the day leading up to your anniversary, you tried texting and calling many times but, you got no answer which made you worry. You tried not to panic, but it's been a week since she has contacted you, and now your anniversary is tomorrow and It all started to hit you, she as probably is too busy for you now.

You sat on the bed, feeling very empty, being with out her was hard enough but her not texting back really hurt you. You didn't realise you were crying until you felt the sleeves of your shirt start to soak up. You laid down, looked at your phone to see if she might have texted back, but there was nothing, you sighed, putting the phone down and closing your eyes.

You woke up to a loud bang on the bedroom door, you jumped up and gasped. Someone was inside your house. You didn't want to check, you're first thought was to call Reneé, hoping she would answer this time. You called her, but coincidently as soon as you called her you could hear a ringtone coming from the other side. You rush to open the door, you came face to face with your girlfriend.

"Happy anniversary baby." She smiles, holding roses and a gift bag for you. "R-Reneé...I don't have anything for you...I didn't know you would be home-" She cut you off by pulling you in for a long awaited kiss. The both of you don't pull away, she pushes you on the bed and finally loses contact with your lips. "I missed this." She says while kissing your collarbones. You almost gave in, but then you remembered that she had ignored you for a week. "Stop." You say.

Reneé looks at you with a lot of confusion, "You've been ignoring me for a week.." You tell her with a lot of sadness in your voice. She sighs. "Y/n, I'm really sorry I've been really busy, the only time I've been on my phone was when I planning the surprise for you." You raise an eyebrow, "Surprise?" You question, she giggles nodding her head. "Well I guessed I've said it now. I've talked to my team.. they have allowed me to bring you along for the rest of the tour!" She smiles. You gasp, you could probably burst out into tears, you were so happy. "Pack your things baby, our flights in four hours."

You spent an hour packing and getting ready, and a lot of kissing Reneé, she tried to make out with you, she manged to get your shirt off and give you a few hickeys on your stomach. You wanted to continue but you knew you wouldn't be able to stop if you did. You put your shirt back on and Reneé grabbed your bags and you headed down to her car, she opened the door for you and then put your bags in the back.

You got to the airport and there was quite a bit of paparazzi, they were shouting some hurtful things towards you, you tried your best to ignore it. One of them tried to grab your shirt and pull you away from Reneé, if it wasn't for her tight grip on you, they would have succeeded. Reneé gave them an angry look, you could see it in her eyes that she was about to shout at this person. "Reneé, Baby, It's okay." That must have calmed her down because she nodded at you and continued to walk to the gate.

You were at the gate, waiting for them to call your flight number, Reneé was already quite tired from her first flight, she laid her head on your shoulder and relaxed her eyes. Not long after your flight was called. You woke Reneé up, and walked on the plane, it was a bit colder then you expected and all your jumpers were in your suitcase, not in your carry on. Reneé must have noticed your change in behaviour, she took off her leather jacketed and put it on you. You smiled at her and she smiled back and you.

The flight was only 4 hours long but Reneé fell asleep quickly, you smile at her, making sure to take a look of pictures of her, even replacing her lock screen with a selfie of you posing next to her sleeping self. After that, you quickly feel asleep.

Reneé woke you up, telling you that we are going to land soon, once you landed, you quickly got off the plane and Reneé took you to her driver. She still hasn't noticed that you changed her background yet. "Baby, I have an interview for mean girls, you wanna come and meet the cast?" she asked you. You nodded happily.

The driver drove to the interview spot and Reneé walked you in and you could see the cast of mean girls all there. You were very shy around new people, so you stayed clingy to Reneé, she introduced  you to everyone. They were all so sweet. You sat behind the scenes as the interview was going on. You just admired Reneé the whole time and what cut you out of it was one of the questions the interviewer asked.

"So Reneé, we all know that you're girlfriend Y/n," You could see her smile just at the mention of her name.  "Is a look less.. prettier then you, how does that make you feel in public?" The interviewer continued, everyone on cast began to feel uncomfortable, Reneé looked more angry then I have ever seen, "Okay, first of all, my girlfriend is fine as fuck, secondly, i'm going to cut off your tongue if you ever speak my girlfriends name again."

She stands up and walks to you, taking your hand, and taking you back to the car, "I'm sorry that happened baby." She sighed, holding your face. You kisses her lips, "It's okay, thanks for defending me baby," She smiles, "I always will." She gets a notification from her phone, she takes it out of her back pocket and thats when she sees the wallpaper, she giggles, "I'm keeping this." you smile.

The notification was a text from Bebe, asking if you were okay, then the rest of the cast asked same thing, Reneé told them that you were okay and that the both of you were going to the hotel.

The night was spent with a lot of making out, watching movies and talking to each other, you could have never imagined spending your anniversary this way, and you loved every second of it.

-

[quillkiller]

for the hot takes thing:

idk if they are hot takes on this blog tbh because the tumblr fandom has messed up my perception of what is popular and what is not but anyway here they are

i do not give a fuck about dorlene. i cant see it. it very often seems like forced lesbian representation to me. like, oh, lets throw them in here so that people dont say maybe i should have some sapphic women in my art if im trying to write about the queer experience. i read only one fic in my entire life that made them interesting and fleshed out characters. usually they are incredibly boring and i dont like it

marauderstok makes me a gatekeeper. i hate gatekeeping but then i see someone on tiktok talking about bartylily or sunkiller or moonrose or peter x barty and i just cant deal with that. they dont get them!!!! i dont even like most of these ships that much but i have moots that do and im overly protective of their blorbos. those people on tiktok dont understand bartylily!!! they are just into it cause it seems weird and unusual!! they dont see the vision of the pure hatred between barty and james that turns into sexual tension! they dont understand why barty would fall in love with peter and they try to make all of these ships into sketches!!! they are not!! those are my children youre talking about!!!

i am not a james fan tbh. probably because of how long ive hated him for. when i was a child and read hp for the first time the scenes with snape made me despise the guy. i spent years trying to explain to people that yes maybe he changed but he was still a terrible bully and nothing can ever excuse that. it got so bad my mom banned me from talking about james potter in our house because ive just said the same things over and over. 9yearold me was very determined. i know that all the marauders were involved but somehow it only affects my relationship with james. i know it unlogical but i just dont like him

on the topic of marauders and sev. i HATE the way fandom acts about it. acknowledge that your favorite characters were flawed! they weren't good people! what the fuck do you mean "i'm proud of james for bullying snape! someone had to do it. snape was just so bullyable"?? snape was a 11year old kid who was incredibly abused at home!!

again on the topic of severus. if i see one more joke made about his hair i'm going to go insane. are you guys aware that sometimes children are neglected so bad that their parents don't teach them things that are obvious to most of us, like how to wash your hair? have you heard about this concept of people not caring about their child and not buying them hygiene products? have your heard about poverty? have you heard about not having enough money to provide your child with all the things they need, including shampoo?

sorry for all that about sev. i am just very passionate about the way he's treated in this fandom. on the topic of characters being treated poorly by the fandom - dumbledore. some people truly believe that it's all his fault which is just so weird to me. he's obviously a deeply flawed man who made a lot of mistakes and i don't necesserily like him but i think we can all acknowledge that he's not the one who killed lily and james? like. he should've fought harder for sirius, obviously, but he didn't murder dorcas. he's not the ultimate villain that people make him out to be

i realise this is more about the fandom than the characters itself and i apologize it's just what's currently on my mind

whew lets get into it……

agreed. they often feel like the token lesbians that are just. already there. so might aswell just throw them into the story lmao and they wont have to flesh them out. i like my own version of dorlene, but yeah :/ people just aren’t interested in lesbians but what else is new

PEOPLE ON TIKTOK ARE TALKING ABOUT BARTLILY ????? jesus…………..

honestly i respect this so much... your mom banning you from talking about james made me laugh out loud…… Mad Respect

honestly. im very grey in this area. i like making fun of his hair unfortunately, but in other contexts i also think sevs greasy hair has a swaggy seductive lesbian flair. depends on how he’s being characterized. i saw a post today that was like ’cant help but laugh at people being angry about people objectifying fictional characters when they’re fundamentally dependant on being objects’ which i fully agree with. it’s part of litterature and film making that the (im gonna talk in film terms bc im a film student) that the mise-en-scene is an active choice, meaning that the way characters are dressed and presented is meant to, on purpose, reveal things about said characters. and often its driven by stereotypes that the audience has. severus is meant to look like a loser because he’s portrayed like a loser / and as someone who will be the victim of bullying. its simply the way his characters is canonically written and portrayed, and writers and viewers pick up on that. also im unfortunately one of the people who think bullying fictional characters is funny. it’s fictional and fandom, and never once have i stumbled upon a person who can’t balance the made-up fandom rules regarding fictional characters and their actuail real life morals. not saying these people don’t exist, but i certainly don’t kiki with them. fandom just doesnt affect real life issues in way some people sometimes seem to think. im personally a severus Lover and his biggest hater depending on the setting/hc’s/etc

i love albus, but i love him because i genuinely think he’s despicable. im not interested in his supposed reedming qualities and i personally dont think he has any….. he allowed teenagers to fight his wars and canonically didnt deny that he doesnt care for harry / and that he raised him like a pig for slaughter. its what makes him interesting. his childhood and early adult years make him one of the most fascinating characters in the fandom.. like i have so many feelings about him. he breaks my heart, he’s awful, he believes he’s good because he has good intentions, he yearns after grindelwald all his life and it was a 2 month summer romance, he killed his sister, his brother barely speaks to him. he’s a tragedy, but still despicable…… but i respect your opinion so much king thank you for sharing

MWAH loved these, thank you…. 🤍🤍