#which isn't a lot but.. blah blah blah u get it

[theloveinc]

things ive now seen on twitter:

bakugo being fucked by a wasp

bakugo IS a wasp and he's being fucked

[yuri-is-online]

Love and Deepspace Timeline: MC, Philos, and the Aether Core

Look I finished Xav's myths card. I don't regret waiting until I was done with it to post his timeline because the last two nodes have more to do with MC than him, but I am in a state so we are making this to cope.

This is all speculation and should not be taken as fact, I have done two other posts, one on Zayne and one on Xavier and I will not be doing one on Rafayel please see this reddit post by u/joonmin for relevant information about his myths card blah blah blah.

This post is less of a timeline and more here to answer questions you very likely have if you: A) decided to browse reddit and saw people saying Xavier feels like the "cannon ro" [this is a gacha game there isn't one] but have never read any of his memories, moments, or dates B) read chapter 8 and went "none of this makes sense I feel like I am missing something" or C) just generally are confused about L&D's world building and what's up with MC. I have answers for you. Wibbly wobbly soupy answers. This post also has a TL;DR in case you don't want to see me break out the string board and just want the relevant bits of information about MC you won't get from the msq.

SPOILERS FOR ALL IN GAME CONTENT UP TO CHAPTER 8, VARIOUS MOMENTS, AND ANECDOTES RELATED TO ALL 3 ROS, PROCEED WITH CARE.

Current Timeline MC (i.e. The one we are playing as)

The game starts with MC's graduation from the Academy and first day as a fully licensed hunter. We learn a few things in this first chapter, namely that MC is combat trained, has a rare heart condition known as Protocore Syndrome that has no known cure, and that her decision to become a hunter has something to do with what she experienced fourteen years ago during the Catastrophe when the Deepspace Tunnel opened and Wanderers started invading earth.

Specifically MC describes something burrowing itself into her heart. She feels helpless, like prey, and has a strong desire to never feel anything like this again. Which is unfortunate because I have a feeling a lot of someones are going to be on her trail sooner rather than later.

In Chapter 5 it is revealed that MC has an Aether core fused to her heart. This sort of human experimentation is highly illegal and it is unknown who did this to MC other than our beloved Grandmother was directly involved. Grandma appears to have taken MC away from wherever this happened after the tests started to threaten MC's life.

This is known to Dr. Zayne and Dr. Noah, though neither seem to know more than what Grandma told them. Neither of them seem to fully understand what an Aether core is or what it is doing to MC's heart. Zayne in particular seems to find this extremely concerning.

Uncovering the mystery of the Aether core seems to be what will be driving the first arc so we will not be discussing it at length here. I do want to note that Xavier absolutely knows what it is, while Zayne does not but does seem to know more of the technical aspects of how it is effecting MC, and Rafayel is at least aware of it being valuable and maybe why exactly the people in the N109 Zone want it.

At some point in the past MC met and made a promise to Rafayel. It is my personal theory that this likely took place on Hat Island during the field trip MC talks about due to some of the comments made in Chapter 7.

MC and Caleb were friends with Zayne in childhood. MC's exact age is a bit fuzzy, but the game does seem to suggest she is younger than Zayne. She does not know why Zayne disappeared from her life or what led him to become a doctor.

Comments in Chapter 4 suggests that Caleb encouraged MC to become a hunter. He seems to be very supportive of her, but Grandma seems more interested in trusting MC's protection to Zayne.

On the surface MC seems pretty normal. Her memories from before the Catastrophe seem to be gone, if she had a mother and father or other blood relatives, she doesn't remember them anymore.

Philos MC (i.e. What is Going on in the Myths)

It is revealed in Xavier's When Shooting Stars Fall anecdote that Philos is Earth in the distant future. This has confused numerous people in the notes of my Xav's timeline so I am going to be insufferable and attempt to assist with a graph:

The MC you play belongs to the game timeline, the MCs (plural each myths card features a different one) in the Myths cards come from the Philos timeline. I have tagged the Game timeline as a "potential tangent" as the events that take place in game are entirely reliant on the existence of the Deepspace Tunnel, which is created in the Philos timeline.

At some point in the Original/Philos Timeline, Earth's core ceases to function. Humanity replaces it with a new, artificial core that causes noticeable weather changes and fuses all of the tectonic plates together, and begins a new calendar counting forward from the years since Earth ceased to be and Philos was born. As a result, we don't know what exact year Earth's core giving out happened in the Original Timeline. The artificial core allows almost all humans to "live eternal." They seem to be like Tolkien's elves in the sense they can live for an eternity but they start to get tired after a while and give up on life. This is why there is a royal family that needs a line of succession. Xavier is the Crown Prince of Philos, he meets MC in school and learns she has a rare disease called Protocore Syndrome which will not allow her to live forever. He attempts to cure this by finding a specific protocore she mentions, but fails to reach her in time and is forced to watch her die. This all happens in the year 214.

At some point MC is reborn and assigned to the same teacher as Xavier. She is to train to become his knight and serve as the leader of the Lightseekers, an order tasked with killing Wanderers. At some point during or before Xavier's coming of age ceremony, he learns the truth about Philos: the planet is dying due to the artificial core never having been meant to sustain the planet this long. The Royal Family's solution for this is to occasionally feed humans to the heart of Philos in Starfall Forest. When they do this, it creates Wanderers. As if that wasn't bad enough, Xavier learns that his father and the royal family have found what they think could be a permanent solution: there is a girl who has achieved true immortality. She is the only person on Philos who can die and be reborn constantly, and while they don't seem to know why she does this, the royal family believes this girl is the life force of the planet itself.

This girl is MC and Xavier does not want this to happen. He has a plan that he does not explain to MC, but it involves traveling back in time. He says they have specific places in time picked out, but we know from Xavier's Passing By anecdote that something went wrong with his team's attempt at time travel and now there is no guarantee that the MC he left on Philos as its Queen is still there.

So now we have two timelines: Original/Philos Timeline and Game/Tangent Timeline. But all of that is just taking Xavier's anecdotes and Myths card into account... so what happens if we try to plug in the other two ROs?

Rafayel

In u/Joonmin's reddit post they mention two very important bits of information: 1) It has been 30,000 years since the sea dried up and 2) MC is a member of the royal family of Philos, not by birth but because "she has a heart that’s been blessed by the gods" and has "awoken from the depths." If all three myths cards take place in the same Philos timeline as the one Xavier leaves, we can reasonably place Raf's myths card after Xavier's backtrack mission.

So the Philos timeline would look like this. I have a note for Zayne's card there as well, but if I had to get picky with it I'm slightly tempted to place his Myths card between MC's first death and her being reborn to meet Xavier again. The other explanation would be that there are three separate Philos timelines created because the MC was successfully scarified to the Heart of Philos. In Xavier's Myths 6 MC briefly takes a dip in the space time anomaly at the center of Starfall Forest which could also explain MC scattering across different timelines, but the in game spacepedia makes a point to say that there is a chance that life still exists on Philos:

So it could simply be that MC over there has been stuck in the exact cycle of death and rebirth that Xavier was trying to prevent. It could also mean that when they add that mystery fourth love interest there is an explanation for a fourth possible myths card. Anyway all this information leaves us with a set of timelines that currently look like this:

This still leaves a lot of unanswered questions. For example, if the Philos timeline is where this all starts, what version of it is? What caused Earth's core to give out in that original timeline? Is Rafayel and Lumeria's existence the consequences of clashing timelines or are mermaids cannon to this universe? What effect on the space time continuum did Xavier's actions have? And how much of this is actually going to be answered in game?

TL;DR

Philos is Earth in the future with an artificial core that started running out of power, and never should have been made in the first place.

The royal family fed some of their long lived humans to the anomaly in Starfall forest to keep the planet running, but then they found out about a girl who could constantly be reborn each time she died and had an idea.

An idea Xavier wasn't very keen on but who cares. They thought that "when the time was right" they would sacrifice her to the rift and leave her there to die and be reborn forever. They also did not think to ask her.

Oh yeah when they fed people to the rift they turned into Wanderers. So wanderers = people as mentioned in Zayne's Still in the Dark anecdote.

Whatever makes MC reincarnate might have something to do with Lumeria, or at the very least the Lumerians in Rafayel's myths card seem to think it does.

In game MC, current timeline MC knows none of this, and has no memories from her lives, past or future. This is consistent across all her incarnations.

Final Thoughts

The only reason why I think this way about timelines is because I watched Donnie Darko in a college theater class. People like to argue about that movie and how it is supposed to be interpreted, but generally speaking they all seem to think that Tangent Timelines and the Tangent Universes they spawn get deleted very quickly, so maybe that's why the game starts by talking about "being able to leave this loop" and why Xavier seems to think something bad will be happening to Linkon City soon.

Chapter 8 ends with Xavier attempting to send a message back through the Deepspace Tunnel to make contact with someone. Interestingly enough he calls this "Traceback II." This sounded familiar to me and sure enough the game starts by mentioning that exact same thing, it is going past a black hole and is what says that line "we are stuck in this loop."

I thought in previous posts that the Aether Core is what could cure MC... but now I think the Aether Core is likely what Philos's artificial core is called... so who created it in the first place? ｢(ﾟﾍﾟ)

The Deepspace Tunnel is a spacetime anomaly likely caused by Philos's existence since it was "never meant to exist." So why was it created? And by who?

[starliights-shining]

How would the djd react to a reader conversation with their friend which is

Friend : if u tortured someone what methods would u use?

Reader : the only torture method I would use is humiliation. Which is if the why I go to kill which would be very fucking dumb with others believing they done it to themselves and absolutely no one will not even fake pity towards them because the evil shit that they had done would be way way out in the open.

Hello, I want you to know there are a lot of djd memebers, so for my own sanity, Ive choosen Tarn, Helex, Kaon. I'm not really a Tarn fan, so If it feels off that why. Sorry this is short, Ive got some things in the works and don't wanna rush them!! So I hope this is something similar to what you were looking for! Enjoy :)

Characters: Tarn, Helex, Kaon

Tarn

He just stares you, unblinking, red optics scanning to see if you are being for real. WIth him being able to see you are he's almost disappointed.

You are with the DJD, he would have thought you had some eleborate plan to inact pain to get the answers youre looking for or need. Yet you give that.

Its smart, of course, he thinks it the most anyone has put into making sure someone is tortured.

Which leads to the next point, he has to see it. If you leave after saying all of that and his stupid ass stare then he will let you go. but he will think about it every time he tortures someone for answers, think about you in his exact position, recreating exactly what you said to him, and then thinking about how it would let to such outcomes.

THIS ONE CONVERSATION leaves such a inprint on him, that the next time he has somene to troture he wants you to do it.

He'll give you full custody to do what you need and want, while he just stand there watching.

Once he sees your torture method working, he'll never question you again. He gives vibes of only trusting you to do things along the lines of torture, like hey we just capture this guy, do what you must to get what we need or want form him.

Helex

I don't think Helex would care, not as much as Tarn or Kaon would. He just isn't into that whole like fuck with their brain shit, not when he can use his fist to beat them to a pile of scrap and get his point across better.

He will not allow you to do your plan, giving the excuse of it being dump and doing what needs to be done.

I think that he'll also think youre thinking to much, thinking far to much when your answers are so close to you, HIM.

He would be little your plan and thoughts until he see it, it works well yes, but its nothing compared to what he can do.

He won't evr let you find out or know that he thinks your plan does work well, he has to keep a hard persona up after all.

After he sees your way work better than his may ever, he'll ocassionally let you do your way, he's not completely ill mannered towards it, he just thinks it takes so long.

Kaon

He's creepy about it, thinks you are so smart for thinking that way.

He'll try to get Tarn to let you use our plan more often, either on basic bots and cons or more special ones.

He'll ask you more questions about it, ask for you to expand on other things and ask completely different questions to see how your processor processes.

"Do you think blah blah blah?" or "Would you be able to switch out blah blah blah?" Or "Maybe try blah blah blah?"

At some point it feels like he just enjoys listening to you talk about anything, but you still answer every one of his questions

I truly think he'd want to help you with acting out said torture methods as well. He may be blind but that won't stop him form helping you with these great ideas and methods of torture.

One of your biggest supports on it as well.

[ctrlhope]

HOSEOK IS HOMEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

OHHHH MY GODDDDD!!!!!!!!

(updates below the cut lol) (also a sneak peak)

hiiiii!!! long time no talkkkkk my lovlies (＞ω＜)♡

first off-- an apology :(( im really sorry for just disappearing. i hate it, you guys hate it. i know :( it's really my worst flaw when it comes to writing / tumblr in general, haha~ i get rlly into something and hyperfixate on it (fun fact: bound by blood was written in like 3 days bc i got so into it lol), and then a gradual fallout until i feel burnt out. which then leads to the whole "omg i left for so long, now im anxious that everyone is gonna hate me when i come back and cause i haven't updated in so long and yadda yadda" when i actually want to come back LMAOOOO. which i know isn't true, but like, you know AKSNDK. So i hung out on my anime blog for a bit, then on discord, blah blah blah boring stuff!!

either way, i really am sorry for just dipping for so long. i always came back to check on this blog every once and awhile and to read stories. i really love the little community i built over here and i love all of you guys dearly. you really make this blog such a fun and enjoyable space for me so i hope you accept my apology and we can all still be fun and hang out and stuff <33 i missed you guys dearly.

THAT BEING SAID!!

I am back!! I was planning to come back for kinktober, actually, but unfortunately time just got away from me and I wasn't able to complete everything that I wanted to. This semester has been HECTIC!!! Senior thesis's are no joke, man, no joke. Feeding 600 spiders... every week.... BLEH!! (not cause of the spiders aksjhwfkh just cause it takes so long!! like!!)

That being said-- I don't have a current update schedule yet, just because I don't want to put too much pressure on myself again (burnout is a bitch!!) but~~ as of right now, I have plans for a "full comeback" (read: first fic) to come out the first week of November!! A little teaser of it will be at the bottom of this post too <33

Hopefully, if everything goes according to plan I will have a 'ficvember' (lol), where I post a fic every other week of November and December!! It is not set in stone (read as: I want to have a few fics lined up before I start just so I don't feel overwhelmed) but if everything goes according to plan, it will happen!! I'll make sure of it!!

I also plan to have a follower milestone soon, so stay tuned for an announcement post of that. I have lots of different things I want to do for it, I'm just not fully sure what you guys would like to see! I also updated my wips, so feel free to check them out to see what i've been working on!

But yeah!! Those are the plans so far!! To lay it out in a more organized manner:

November 1st: Chasing Tornados -> myg

November 2nd - 8th: Follower milestone announcement

November 15th, November 29th: New fic

Anyway! To wrap up this entirely too long post (I'm sorry, I'm terrible at shutting up), I truly am sorry for just leaving for so long. I have lots of plans in the works-- things I'm very passionate about and need to get out of my head before I explode, so new fics coming soon, I promise <333

Now, here's the reward I promised if you made it this far <33 I love u and we should kiss on the mouth freaky style <333

[love-killed-the-superstar]

The Last Ronin 2: Re-Evolution Issue #1 LIVEBLOG

SPOILERS ABOUND. I'M NOT GOING TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS IT'LL PROBABLY GET SUPER LONG

Okay so Casey Marie's muscles are something I'm never going to get over. SHE LOOKS GOOD!!!!! Her getup is feeling a little too reminiscent of a cape-wielding superhero for my tastes to be honest - I really loved the more practical outfits she wore in TLR Lost Years, especially in issue 4 when she was running the training mission for the kids. But ah well, I'm sure this will grow on me. It may not be practical (edna's law of no capes is coming to mind, also PLEASE TIE YOUR HAIR UP WHEN YOU'RE FIGHTING GIRL!!!) but it's very cunty anyway which I appreciate

Straight up thought she killed this guy - what was that sound effect if he's still able to walk??? I fr thought she snapped his neck

IDK if we needed a whole 8 pages of punching and kicking to exposition dump what we kinda already knew from what's been shown in the lost years (esp the lost day special) but IT'S FINE IG... NOW ONTO THE BABIES

SORRY, SORRY. TEENAGERS NOW.

GIGGLING KICKING MY FEET. We're ALREADY getting the leo-v-raph adjacent dynamic with these two and I'm living for it. if one of them drops a stone cold 'fearless leader' jab i will lose my shit

HI? HELLO, EXCUSE ME, MIND-TALKING? PICTURES IN HEAD? ARE WE A FAMILY THAT LUCID DREAMS OR SOMETHING?!?? I DON'T REMEMBER THIS BEING SOMETHING THEY COULD DO?? every new speech bubble here is like a punch to the gut, wdym telepathy wdym secret lair wdym honouring everything master splinter taught you???? (although i'm proud that when this panel dropped on news sites i was immediately like THAT ISN'T THE KITCHEN FROM LOST YEARS. turns out it was a Secret Lair TM)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Seance -- TURTLES COUNT IT OFF!!

not gonna screenshot the whole backstory but they're basically doing a telepathic puppet show explaining the backstory and it's pretty much the mirage origins with a bit of extra tlr flair. as always it HURTS ME seeing the turtles dying so thanks for that tlr2 :'')) icb these kids watch a mind movie of their uncles dying every fucking night. yall are messy

SOBBING AND CRYING,, I WISH YOU'D ALL HAD THE CHANCE TO KNOW HIM TOO!!!!!! I WISH YOU'D GOTTEN TO KNOW ALL OF THEM!!!!! (tlr splinter doesnt count tho because hes a dick)

there was a cool sequence of them rooftop hopping n stuff but i wont cover it bc we already saw it in a bunch of news articles weeks ago

i just did the SHARPEST INHALE. casey marie you and your beautiful muscular arms have aged like the finest wine

YI NO!!!!!

lmaooo moja is JUDGING your taste in women u two

lots of text... blah blah blah jobs, crimerates, blah blah... jiro in pig uniform jumpscare.. casey marie i thought u were going to fix him :(((

YESSSSS KIDS ARE GOING ON A MISSION WITH THEIR MOM, LETS FUCKING GOOOOO

MY BABIES ARE KICKING ASS!!!!!

....,.HUH

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY BABY BOY ODIE!!!!!!!!!!! WHO DID THIS TO HIM!!!!!!???? WHAT??!???? HUH/1?!!? EXCUSE ME????

I'M . LIKE WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS. IT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE??? WHAT IS GOING ON!!!

FINAL THOUGHTS:

dude that first issue was wordy but the kids were ON POINT. they were so fun!! their dialogue is fun and they kick ass.

i loved yi announcing the punishment for casey while the others were like NOO SHE DIDNT MEAN THAT DONT LISTEN TO HER. we're getting more of their personalities and it's great!! it was a nice throwback to issue 2 of lost years when they were cleaning - yi refused to help because of how strictly she was following instructions. im picking up that she might be neurodivergent but i did get that from the lost years too - only doing things within strict instructions, getting frustrated at teaching odyn chess, not because of him playing horseys with the knights but that it was Against The Rules Of Chess - and now not picking up on some social cues. It's nice to see!! I love her very much, but it feels like besides rehashing the origin story she took a bit of a backseat to the other three.

i want to know more about why uno said being a rebel was moja's 'thing', since she didn't seem to be any more rebellious than the other three in this issue. we didn't get any unique interactions between her and casey marie which is what i felt was lacking from lost years but i wonder if this is hinting towards a more turbulent mother-daughter dynamic with them... I REALLY HOPE SO!! her and uno butting heads in a leo-raph way is very fun - i don't mind one or two prior group dynamics leaking into the new turtle siblings because they're all so different from the original 4.

uno seems to be taking on slightly more of a leader role than moja so i think he won the title of fearless leader. which is fine, i think it'll be fun to see and he's definitely less of an asshole now than when he was growing up in lost years. still picking on odyn a bit but seems to snipe at moja just as much. even when he was commenting on yi's storytelling he didn't make fun of her, though - i think she may have inherited the 2k3 don ability of being Completely Unbullyable.

i was really pleased that odyn felt more involved!! i feel like he took the backseat a few times in lost years - it was fun seeing more of his personality shine through! he and yi seem to get on the best, and i giggled at them rolling their eyes at moja and uno's raph-leo schtick. i didn't expect him to TURN TO FUCKING STONE THOUGH, so i'm nervous about that. WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHO DID THIS TO MY BOY? IS HE GOING TO TURN BACK NEXT CHAPTER OR IS HE OUT OF COMMISSION UNTIL THE END OF THE RUN??? (if it's the latter i'll be a bit annoyed - don't take odyn away from the equation please!!)

I do wonder if by introducing casually that they can PSYCHICALLY CONNECT, the turtles will use that as a technique to reach odyn's mind to make sure he's still in there and piece together what's happened to him. i mean, their casual telepathy has gotta be some sort of chekhov's gun right?

and shit.... april was so fucking mad casey took the babies out so she's going to EXPLODE when she finds out what happened to her baby boy, her beloved favourite, her baby odyn :''(( im giggling rubbing my hands together waiting for the fallout but also if she cries i might cry too. speaking of april, she seems to be working on a new project and i saw nano particles mentioned - are we going to have a roninverse version of nano in this run???? I NEED MY ROBOT SON

as always, casey marie... u have aged like fine wine. u are stunning. disappointed that ur still believing that jiro can do good as a cop when their entire police force and government is corrupt as fuck. just feels very naive of her. i'm excited to see her break down at the concept of losing odyn - in fact i need everyone to mourn this beautiful kid. they tell us so much that shes a super clingy helicopter mom and i am picking up on the strict part, but it would be nice to see more of her just... hugging her kids. holding them. i get why she didnt in this issue but id love more mama casey squishing their cheeks and kissing their foreheads.

i have zero fucking clue what's going on with odyn. im wondering if it's somehow related to nano, or to whatever project April is working on - she says it's to do with clearing the tunnels, but I''m not convinced. who knows, there might be some ulterior motive happening.

Anyway, that's the end of my liveblog!! thanks for reading all the way to the end... go read it wherever you read ur comics!!!

[scoonsalicious]

you've got me invested with Unwanted! and I've got stuff I wanted to say. First off, buckle up because this is a long one. Second, I'm not defending him in anyway shape, or form, Bucky is still an absolute piece of shit for what he's done. BUT I will say, I do see why it came to that point. I mean, the obvious manipulation from she who i will not name correctly. look, Jusepie is smart, I'll give her that, bc she's so calculated about every single interaction she and Bucky have. The way she played into his insecurity, self-doubt, and fears, it didn't come off as a surprise to me why Bucky went down that rabbit hole. I saw it this way, Jordan made his fears worse unbeknownst to him, she's the reason why Pocket and him are arguing more and causing a rift in their relationship, AND THEN she throws in that life vest of "oh i understand you more, you can be open to me because we're basically the same person" so she seems like the good guy in the eyes of Bucky. it's kinda like, you push someone who can't swim in a pool without them knowing, and then you save them from drowning so at the end, you still end up being a hero even tho you caused the problem in the first place?

THEN you add the layer of what Hydra has done to him which, we already know how much that messed him up both physically and mentally AND THEN you add the layer that he's not even from this century! And during that time? fragile masculinity? lack of consent? so many things wrong in that era? It's This might sound so condescending but Bucky is a very very VERY fragile man with a fragile mind that can easily be manipulated AND ON TOP OF THAT, actually has a really fragile ego too. And Jeremiah FED all that, she kept telling him things he wanted to hear to make it SEEM like she's on his side and that's she's the only one who gets him even tho that's not true at all.

Bucket isn't innocent obviously, especially with the things he said and didn't say (a.k.a. defending pocket, calling out Jerico and putting boundaries). basically everything he's admitted about the mental gymnastics he was doing to make it seem like he wasn't doing anything wrong blah blah blah. i could only shake my head bc, really? But then it circles back to how fragile his emotional and mental being is. but still, you can't use that as an excuse. AND i will argue, he was having a power trip. what, someone who thinks no one will ever love or even admire him after everything that he's done (even tho it's not his fault) to suddenly having two women vying for his attention? better yet, FIGHTING for him? he's a man, at the end of the day, and they ain't shit.

now, while i don't see him as unredeemable bc I do see his side then again, people keep saying i have too big of a heart so lol, i also don't think this is going to be an easy fix bc hell, i don't trust him either. like everything that comes out of his mouth, i'd be side-eyeing a lot. While I do believe that once you start spying on who your partner talks to, texting, interacting, etc, that relationship is already over. But i also can't blame Pocket bc this is more or less a last resort to save a friendship for than anything else. bc I really do think they need to start from scratch to be able to come out of this. like, build that trust first, then that friendship before they can even start thinking about dating each other again.

I am worried though, because the thing with Bucky and Josiah, as much as we don't like to admit it, they have built some sort of friendship (toxic one but i'll digress). And it has also become a habit (i could argue addiction) for Bucky, especially when he's been open and vulnerable to her (i get there are things you just aren't brave enough to tell your part but like dude, pocket isn't the fragile girl that you think she is, she can handle it) so it's going to be a tough thing for him to navigate and there's still a possibility that he'd crack under pressure (i don't want to say relapse but u get my point), especially knowing the lengths Jose will go through to get to him. It's really up to him to resist her as much as he can, but Bucky is also a good man. He tends to see the good in people even if they absolutely do not deserve it. I mean I'm the same, because if i see someone cry, even if that someone has been absolute shit to me, it cave so easily. and I have no doubt Julian will play into that HEAVILY. i don't think she's shown what she's fully capable of and that's scary.

I know you said that something is still about to happen come chapter 18 before things become all fixing and groveling, and i'm really worried that this would be a nail on the coffin that would make Bucket irredeemable but, you also said it wasn't as bad as chapter 13 so i'm having my theories that the angst might not come directly from bucky, or that he has no control over it a.k.a it's all Jack's masterplan that Bucky wasn't conscious about it (i really hope not please i'm thinking about the worst). And while i don't agree with Pocket doing a nasty revenge just to get back at Bucky. I think it's more powerful for him to hurt solely because it's his own doing, not because Pocket did something intentionally to hurt him. But I also can't say I don't blame her. but I mean, if it wasn't intentional though? I could look the other way haha. Anyway I can't wait to see how you've decided to play this out! sorry for this whole essay haha much love 🤍

Okay, first off, I fucking LOVE THIS. All of it. These J names? SENDING ME. GIVING ME LIFE! I am cracking up over here to the point my dogs are concerned. They’re giving me Looks.

Second, it fills me with unspeakable JOY that you completely, 110% get where I’m trying to come from with Bucky! It’s been difficult for me to express all the things going on in his head when he’s not a POV character, especially without making it sound like he’s just bullshitting Pocket with his words, or being insincere or flat out lying, so to read that you picked up what I was putting down so succinctly is just ::chef’s kiss::

Third, Pocket gets her revenge, but not in a malicious way. Like, she doesn’t set out to make him suffer. She just… makes some decisions that lead to him facing the consequences of his actions in painful ways. Some are satisfying and funny and some are sad and difficult, but they all build toward Bucky seeing how absolute shit he was to her. As for Judas’s master plan, if you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking re: Bucky not being conscious of it, don’t worry— I didn’t go there. If you’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking, then I have no idea what you’re thinking lol

Trying to be purposefully vague about Chapter 18: it’s not so much what Bucky does that causes the angst— it’s how he responds to what he did that really gets to Pocket. She notes to Wanda and Nat that she could have forgiven him for his actions, in time, but not for the way he followed up on them.

[oceisastar]

kaveh soft dom guy back again for more (you're feeding into my delusions)

mmmnm i don't know if it's because i'm ace or what, but any smut that is mean/degrading is an instant turn-off for me:// not my style whatsoever!! and it's disappointing how of the few domtop reader posts there are that barely any are just,,, gentle and loving or smth.

plus plus the fact that there is very little tender content relating to some heavy kinks or wtv. like tentacles. tentacles r so hot but i'm turned off 9/10 times bc it's either outright noncon, dubcon, or just downright mean:>

ofc i don't mean to shame anybody into that, but just like piss lol. some ppl are turned on by it just as it's an instant boner killer to others :shrug:

but enough nonsensical rambling: what about soft body worship w like kaveh or cyno or whoever else<33 just running your hands up and down their sides, mindful of the room's temperature and with a blanket in reach. when gooseflesh begins to follow your questing fingers, you tuck the blanket around him.

and just when he least expects it—all warm and cozy, but undeniably horny out of his right mind—, you flip the two of you so that he's straddling your thigh, blanket still tucked tight around him.

"ride me," you murmur, hands trailing up his quivering thighs,,, but your strap isn't on, and he looks at you with a pout. you grin. "ride my thigh, honey."

you swear you feel his cunt clench atop your tensed thigh, but your own thoughts are soon lost to the hazy high of sweet moans and whimpers fluttering past kiss-bitten lips.

hehe i may become a regular in your thirst boxes<3 if u don't mind, what characters are your favs? or just any you'd like a thirst for

MDNI

tw mention of trauma and issues related to consent //

hi again!

no same tbh. I go into the genshin smut tag being like la la la and then I see the reader degrading / humiliating the character in every single fic and I’m like 😐 it makes me uncomfortable! it’s an instant turn-off.

I’m not gonna get too into it but I have a very complicated relationship w physical touch / sex so seeing such a strong oversaturation of violence / aggressive control / shame in sex is really discouraging tbh. bc then it’s like do people even exist who would be kind and gentle and respect my boundaries?? then there’s the whole commentary on sexism and cisheteronormativity blah blah.

yeah unfortunately most kink content on the internet has major issues related to consent which is :/ it’s just not good because of how common it is. like on tumblr ppl generally are good abt tagging their stuff but media literally anywhere else has such an issue w it. I’m into lots of stuff but consuming content where it’s not centered around shame / degradation / humiliation is very hard to find, which is unfortunate.

I think kink definitely has its uses and can be major catharsis, especially in relation to trauma, but there needs to be a balance and variety in the intensity and type of dynamic in which kink is practiced / enacted (animated or real content).

~

omg I swear are you a poet?? your writing is so beautiful! kaveh is so sweet and soft that’s so tender 🥺 I love the concept of wrapping him up and making him so cozy. just cupping his face as his eyes water from how much pleasure he’s feeling.

my fave character is kaeya :)) he’s my baby boy and I really adore him. I’m so soft for him and he’s very special to me. transmasc Kaeya is canon as far as I’m concerned. idk if u write for women (understandable if u don’t!) but I also really love kujou sara and candace. women w strong integrity / morals are so <3

you can pop by again:) just don’t burn yourself out!

[cosmic-ships]

6am ramblings :) I did not spellcheck this so lol good luck! Aksnsk

So Mega.lop.olis is an actual mindfuck. Like the visuals are so incredibly cool but if you don't pay close attention it will seem like random and complete nonsense.

Despite everyone saying how bad it is, its actually not? I found it to be really good with a good story that goes into a pretty deep discussion about our way of living. (Again if you're paying attention!)

Now onto the other stuff (that I was screaming about last night)

They outright say my boy has mania and given how a certain scene goes and the story that goes with it it is very very deeply implied that my love suffers from the same mental illness I do which is very unfortunate but I instantly could relate to him on a deeper more understanding level. Ce.s.ar went through an episode and did some not so great things and my heart absolutely broke for him. As stated last night, the moment it started I instantly knew what was happening before it became aware to audience.

Much like my irl self and the woman who birthed me, he does not get on well with his mother. We both have very very shitty mothers (our fathers aren't in the picture. This also contributes to Ce.s.ar's moods and again my heart breaks for him because he's just so sweet and his mother is so....not...)

Pretty sure my boy cannot die, like.. ever. I yelled in the theater last night mainly because loud sound and what happened to him (he got shot in the right side of his face ;A; survived though by using the very stuff he discovered to create, to heal his face. The surgeons used it for him)

Silly rambles(?) Kinda.

I did not like the canon love interest that was happening. Ya know despite my raging jealousy lol like just viewing it, they would have been better off as rivals(?) Granted she helps him in a huge way when someone tries to lie and say he's done (x) things and proves he is innocent but in terms of relationship all I saw was someone following him around (literally stalking him in her car with her friend) and then it's just a weird little timeskip of "oh we work together now" but doesn't say or show what she actually does?

Also what confused me is Ce.s.ar's ability to stop time. Well not so much him in general but more so...can anyone use it? Because there's a scene (blah blah canonxcanon) where she gets him to think about her to try and stop time because he seemed to have lost the ability after his big episode. It works and thats what kicks off their relationship? But then their relationship isn't really..idk concrete? Its so hard to explain but I did not connect to her and his relationship. Nothing made me root for them as a couple in the way the movie thought I might would??

OKAY TIME TO GET ALL SQUEAKY AND WEIRD (kinda some suggestive kinda not?? Suggestive Marked ☆ lol)

☆ I got flustered in the theater, like I hid in my shirt. Because there's a uh...a scene while granted I do not like the visuals it was with a different girl and not his love interest. Near the start of the movie...ahem the s o u n d s lets just say Ce.s.ar is very vocal and it wasn't even the actual act of ..y-yknow. He was just heavily making out and grinding I hid in my shirt and the guy sitting beside me was like "are you okay?" And I was like "t-tooootally normal and fiiiiiine" I was not fine. >////>

☆ Don't allow this man to consume copious amounts of alcohol he'll end up in his underwear...tight black underwear to be exact AHEM

Ce.s.ar like cloakes lol he wears one often he looked realllllllly good in it too~

My man has the case of the sillies!! No really, he sometimes will randomly dance OR if asked a question he replies in a silly way "is mega.lop.olis safe?" And he just goes "absolutely not, extremely dangerous you all should RUN!" and then he got all giggly and was like "no its actually extremely safe~" also he smiles A LOT and also also there is a moment when he's learning something similar to those old games in school like miss Mary mack hand game and he gets faster and faster and faster and when its basically noncoherent the other is like "stop! What are you doing!?" And he's like "a solo!" HELP he's so fucking cute???? like I love you even more??

I was expecting softly spoken always serious. While I got it in certain scenes from him, he's actually so playful and silly which is so fucking great for me because I too am very playful and silly. He can also be loud like his voice can be very commanding and im like.."h-h..hey ~♡'

1000/10 love my man ever more now and because of the rocky//weird relationship that was happening in canon I already know how to make my self insert fit into it WITH EASE

Also it seems like more than one person has a certain type of power? Ce.s.ar could stop time and his partner before the main love interest can hypnotize people.

So who tf says I can't take elements from my ISS SI And bring em over to this work eh~? Ehehehe

If you made it this far thanks for listening to my rambles!

OH BIG THING I FORGOT big spoiler

his love interests father is responsible for making sure his dead wife's body was never found??? Hullo!? And then its touched upon a little bit but then the movie treated Ce.s.ar and the girls dad as if it was completely forgotten by the end if the movie like after that reveal it was still the dad hating him and Ce.s.ar was just....??? Still wanting his praise and approval?? I really did not like that. He should have been pissed! I mean the man convicted Ce.s.ar of killing his own wife which wasn't the case. Due to Ce.s.ar's untreated bip.olar he (like me) was deemed 'too much' and sadly, unfortunately, his wife couldn't take it and she did take her own life but it was that girls father that made it look like he killed her and Ce.s.ar was convicted (but acquitted shortly after)

So I'm taking my man, from everything. My boy now, I'm going to show him all the love and compassion that he deserves and show him he's not alone, that he doesn't have to settle for just anyone who strolls into his life, I will hold him and tell him he isn't a burden, that he is lovable and so much more than the disorder that plagues him because in that regard we are the same— we sometimes do and say things without knowing we don't have the same rationality as other people do when we are struggling but thats okay, he'll have me to lean on, we'll weather it together ♡

I am sad he has what I have but also at the same time, I don't feel as alone anymore, this isn't just me going "I hc him with bip.olar" the movie makes it pretty obvious that he actually has it. I feel even more so connected to him than I did before because I understand him and its comforting to know that he'd understand me too...

[gayforminatozaki]

list of irrational things in religion (according to academic scholar gayforminatozaki bsc msc phd bpd):

god has no gender and yet is called a he. god is above humans and yet is still affected by the misogny created by human society. god is the CREATOR, and isn't called a she? even if god had to choose one pronoun being called she would make more sense since yk females quite literally create life

god creates ALL creations, and decides to make humans the "main" ones bc we're special and above other creatures. this is clearly due to supernatural interference and not just the fact that we're the only animals with high levels of communciation (making survival a shit ton easier)

"how does anything exist without a creator!!!" u are under the assumption that for smth to exist there must be a creator, and this is cliche but then who created the creator? "no one created the creator, the creator is eternal". so why can't the creation of the "creator" be eternal? why say "every creation has a creator" if u simply explain god as having no creator and being eternal?

"then how does the universe exist? how can we be observers of the miracle of life itself and claim there's no god". this universe isn't a "miracle". you're under the assumption that only one universe was ever created. there may have been many many other universes created, but have no observers- so we cant measure it or it's existence. the reason we're even able to observe this universe is BC it's so complex, not the opposite.

(cont from above) "miracle of life" is so stupid imo. yes it's very impressive we can live but really, once u put into perspective how long this universe has existed u realise it's not that surprising. it took ages for simple life to form, then over time we just got to more complex life. and reached a form of life with incredible communication skills which allowed for even better survival and blah blah evolution and stuff. a lot of ppl still can't put it into perspective so think of it like this: a million years ago u wouldn't imagine that AI or computers or anything would exist. it's too complicated, it must've been by a "higher power". in reality we worked in steps, going from simple inventions to more complex ones. honestly? imo life and consciousness is literally just complex biological code (with chemicals added to it to make people feel emotions and stuff).

even if god existed, it's NOT an abrahamic god. it's not even a god concerned with humans. if a god really existed, it would've created the big bang and nothing else. ur telling me god made all this fucking shit and space in the universe and he wants to focus on these tiny creatures on a random planet? and that they need to believe and pray to him or he'll get sad? or that we're really that important that he's "testing" us? sure. that's definitely not arrogant.

sorry if this didn't make sense I'm half asleep and hate religion (and no i dont hate u if ur religious why did u read this far down anyway if u are)

[possibilistfanfiction]

"the neoliberal rhetoric of the pronoun (ESPECIALLY in english) as the ultimate form of advocacy" -- it's such a relief to hear your take on ava's thoughts on pronouns bc i've always been frustrated by how limiting they are? how much stress they cause? i know pronouns are important for some folks but also we're so much more than that...

whew like ok i work in dei, mostly for youth (sport, schools, etc) but also doing lgbtq 101 workshops for upper level execs who run big sports orgs, school districts, blah blah, & it's like... people really think that getting someone's pronouns right (or even trying to get someone's pronouns right) is like........ you have done it! u are not transphobic! u understand the nuances of everyone's gender if you use the right pronoun!

& like... i get paid a fair amount of money to lowkey sell out & explain what a pronoun is (lol) but at the same time it is the fucking bane of my existence. i personally hate pronouns. i think they are legitimately so stupid lol. like... to distill the vast nuanced experience of both having a gender identity AND being perceived at all times as a gendered being (which sometimes match & sometimes don't) into a PRONOUN is just baffling to me.

i think cis people (especially those who don't really want to do the work needed to understand what abolition means -- how queerness & especially gender expansive trans identities are a crucial part of the intersection of where that ethic is rooted) just see pronouns as a sort of easy way out. like you're cool with trans people if you can remember someone's they/them pronouns. it's so gross & so deeply tried up in representational politics (diverse oppressors are still oppressors, white supremacy can be present in ethic & politic even without a white person in the room, etc).

& of course like you said pronouns are definitely important to some people (it is always nice to feel seen & respected at the most basic level 🤪) & definitely not at all saying that anyone should like get people's pronouns wrong, obviously, but i just really hate the concept of how my entire experience as a dyke & a person in general has to be reflected to the world at all times in a silly word which is so vastly incomplete. & i genuinely (not anyone's fault!) hate how that can get tied up in my writing, especially my writing about queerness. when ppl rly care abt terms & IDs etc i can understand bc the common messaging is all rooted in neoliberalism & "representation" instead of anti-state resistance, etc, so it's like. okay lol. but i am intentional in the way i write queerness bc of my own ethic & politic, so you know

ANYWAY yes. queerness & transness is so deeply expansive, to make it only about (or mostly about) pronouns is, to me, ethically against what queerness & transness really is, especially if those pronouns are mostly talked about in the context of english. & i would be remiss in saying that using non-normative &/or neopronouns is a privilege rooted in safety. often i don't disclose they/them pronouns bc i just don't want to explain myself, & i deeply do not care, but i'm always protected in a lot of ways by my whiteness (& that i'm educated, able-bodied, cis-passing, employed, etc etc etc). for a lot of people, for a lot of reasons, pronouns aren't safe. being out as trans isn't safe. but that doesn't mean their gender identities are any different or less important or less vital.

so yah ur right sorry this is a rant lmfao & once & for all.... ava is the most anti-state anti-institution character lmao. she genuinely would not give a flying fuck about her own pronouns. god doesn't fit into a pronoun anyway :)

[suusoh]

Reverse au ask :)))!! I wonder if Anna will have the same goal as canon Johan?

Oki so I'm just gonna ramble here so bare with my uncohesive thoughts and flow in explanation. So I think Anna wouldn't have the same goals as Johan per se. Because although this is a reverse au, it won't exactly be the same as if Johan were just a girl version.

Some main points that I think Anna's goal would differ is that wherein Johan wants to eliminate all things (except select few: nina and tenma) because to him all lives are equally dead to him.

Anna would difer in the way that she would want to eliminate all things that she personally thinks would get in the way for her new world. Think something like makima or daenerys (done right... not the season 8 mad queen writing fhasjdk).

Because to me, johan represents the kind of evil where no life has meaning... but anna is a special kind of evil where only *certain* lives have meaning. BEcause it's fuckign terrifying yes that to johan everyone is an ant and you could die at any second because evey life is equally insignificant to him

anna has this fucking terrifiyng element where some lives do matter, and SHE deciedes wether u live or die or not, SHE chooses, little miss unhinged playing god.

("all animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others" animal farm anyone?)

And this ties to the fact that she was given up as a kid, so in that way, she believes that maybe some people are worth sacrificing if it means a means to an end. And in her path to a better world where little girls don't have to be given up by their mommies, she decides who gets to stay in that world or not.

but i guess the thing that becomes the same is that little rainy rurenheim night where she gives up on her goal and would just end herself instead.

I think a lot of her plans in this alternate monster universe is powered by some internal rage ofc to her personal experiences so something something noone is equal blah blah something something i was never the favourite, something something i never had anything GOOD in my life, I was the one mom chose to gave up right Johann? Mom chose you.

Which is why i have this vision in my mind wherein the inverse of Nina's iconic "I forgive you." is Johann telling Anna— "I'm sorry."

(because he empathises and knows what she's going through and god after all the bad shit that's happened to you, isn't that something you want to hear so badly? something you needed to hear. that it borders to the point of catharsis )

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm sorry I was the one mom saved.I'm sorry she gave you away. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you i'm sorry it was you and not me.

I'm sorry anna. You don't deserve any of this. I'm sorry... I'm so sorry.

something like that!! Anyways will edit in the morning bleep bloop :^)

(also it makes it sooo nice that alternate universe johan's— or "Johann" if we should differentiate him ehehehee— key to saving his sister is using that god levels of empathy and EQ seen throughout the monster anime. He always seems to know the right thing to say, so I think it's be neat to apply it here, where he knows exactly what it is that Anna needs to hear the most in the world)

[angel-anachronism]

can you do a platonic noel x reader? any scenario you wish to write would be heavily appreciated <3 thank u!

Of course! Noel is actually my favorite character from RTC (along with Ricky) So this will be fun to write! Sorry if this didn't come out how you wanted, but I literally came up with the idea for this scenario in like 1 minute, so the idea isn't really that developed, and the story turned out kind of cheesy （◞‸◟）

Thanks to your request, here's your order of a scenario I came up with! The scenario is about how (Y/N) and Noel are both in a group project at school, and are assigned to write a story together. This was an excellent way for Noel to introduce (Y/N) to his very own original character, Monique Gibeau.

Also, sorry for not writing in almost a week! I was busy with school, but now I'm free to write because It's a winter vacation (for me at least)!

By the time I'm posting this, it will be Christmas eve, so for anybody that celebrates it, please take this as a present (also for people who don't celebrate it, since you guys also deserve a present from me)

(Tw: mentions of stabbing in (Y/N) and Noel's story that they were making)

Word count: 1,007 words

Monique Gibeau's happy ending (PLATONIC NOEL+Gn!READER)

(𝓨/𝓝)'𝓼 𝓟𝓞𝓥

I was tapping my pencil against the desk as I was listening to the teacher talk about something. I wasn't really paying attention since this was the last period of school, so the only words I heard were "blah blah blah, Mr/Miss/Mx. (L/N) and Mr. Gruber, blah blah blah". Yeah, it was pretty boring to be hones- WAIT DID THE TEACHER MENTION MY NAME? AND ON TOP OF THAT, NOEL'S????

I looked at my friend Noel, who was sitting next to the person that was sitting behind me, and he also had the same shocked expression. as me.

He mouthed "what do we do?" And I just shrugged and put my head on my desk as an answer. The bell finally rang and the bell signaled the end of the day. We all got up from our seats and I walked to Noel since I think that we got assigned some kind of project.

"So...We're assigned to do a story, right?" I asked. Noel sighed and nodded, before he got his backpack and walked away, together with me.

"Yeah…and by we, you mean you and I," he whispered, trying to not bring attention to us as we were both walking out of school. "Oh…" I said, trying not to let my voice sound disappointed. He smiled. "Well, at least we'll have each other as a partner! That has to be better than going alone!" He laughed. I chuckled. "Yeah…" I said again before we went outside. It was still snowing and the ground looked like glass under my feet. I grabbed Noel's hand and pulled him towards the coffee shop where our classmates would skip class to go. I'm sure most of them wouldn't be there since they already went home or to their clubs, but I wanted to make sure we'd get something to eat before going to his house to work on the project. When we came in, it was actually fairly empty. There were maybe 5 people in total, excluding the two of us, which made things a lot easier, and we found a small table by the window so we could sit and eat without being bothered. Noel sat down first and then patted the chair next to him. I sat down and took off my coat before Noel took out his Chromebook that we had to carry at school every day.

"How about we start writing the project here so that we can have time to only edit it when we go to my house," Noel suggested. "Sure, sounds good!" I said. "Do we have a certain theme we need to follow for this project?" I asked. "Uh, yeah. A love story!" Noel said, looking kind of excited "Ooohhhh…" I smiled, thinking about what kind of story this could be. "Do you have any ideas about what characters we should write about?" I asked. "Umm, well…I've been meaning to ask you if I could tell you something personal." He said sheepishly. "Oh! Uh, sure! Only if you feel comfortable with it!" I replied, getting excited.

"Okay so…uhm…" He began, clearly not wanting to say whatever he wanted to say, but I could tell it was important. "Well, it's sorta embarrassing to say…" He muttered. "Tell me! I promise I won't laugh!" I reassured him. "Okay…um…" He started again. "It's kinda embarrassing, but…" he looked back into my eyes "but I thought you might understand." "Understand what?" I asked. He bit his lip. "That I created this character named Monique Gibeau as an alter ego of mine…" he mumbled again. "She was always one of my favorite characters ever because she's so independent and brave, but she's always faced with a bad ending…" He added quietly. I felt sorry for him.

"How about we write a happy ending for her in this story we're creating?" I asked, giving him a melancholic smile. He looked slightly surprised. "A happy ending?! Are you serious?!" He looked at me with big eyes. I giggled. "Of course! What kind of hero doesn't want a happy ending?" I said jokingly. "Plus, this story is based on your favorite character, so why not give the whole thing a try?" I tried to encourage him. "I'm not really a fan of happy endings, but sure, let's try I guess…" he said. He seemed to think for a minute, then he got excited.

"Alright, so how about we start with a plotline for this?" He asked, pulling up his notes. "So basically Monique is a hooker from post-war France, and one day she kills her pimp. After getting away with murder, she falls in love with someone who doesn't love her, and-" "Woah Noel! That's a novel-worthy plot you gave there!" I interrupted with a twinkle in my eyes. "But we do need to write a love story with a happy ending!" I continued

"Well, Monique loves this guy called Marcel, and he loves her too, although he's afraid that if he tells Monique that he wants her love, she'll laugh at him. Then she decides to meet him after her shift ends, and she gets stabbed in the back by Marcel. She then wakes up in the house of a nurse named…" he trailed off as he looked over a few pages. He turned around and smiled at me. "I got it! The nurse's name is Elisa, and Monique finally feels true love when she gets to know Elisa. Done, that's the happy ending that you so wanted." Noel said, trying to look bored, but underneath that bored facade, you could see that he actually had fun making that story. I smiled at him. "You really are a creative genius! Let's start writing now." I said, drinking my coffee. He grinned and he began writing. I can't wait to finish this story that Noel came up with within 1 minute.

𝑅𝑒𝒷𝓁𝑜𝑔 >> 𝐿𝒾𝓀𝑒 (𝒩𝑜𝓉 𝒻𝑜𝓇𝒸𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝐼 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝓃𝑒𝑒𝒹 𝓂𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇𝓈)

[liauditore]

The thoughts, hand em over. (No pressure but I wanna hear em :D)

oh god what have u done.

context.

OK SO,. (BE WARNED THIS IS LIKE. REALLY LONG AND BRAINROTTY.)

first off i must put here as per the law i am not in fact armchair psychoanalysing mc youtubers grian and mister scott S. major this is me looking at the 3L series as is it were a performance and their actions in said series as characters and blah blah blah so on so forth this is Fanfiction and Shipping and woowoOOwoo We Are Being Sillyyy with a miku song.

i'm gonna infodump abt a bunch of stuff including some heavy topics like emotional abuse and dubcon (NOT in detail the song just has those vibes)

so uh if you're reading this for Some Reason know that 👍

ALRIGHT WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY Vampire the song itself is (at least my reading of it) a song about a toxic relationship. The singer is very much not a Good Person and the main chorus is just them disregarding their partner's needs and pushing the relationship even further.

But the singer isn't completely irredeemably evil, since they really do love the person they're abusing (in a childish sense of the word love, anyway) and seem to be at least acutely aware of how they're not really a good person.

But of course, they "eh whatever" these self-reflections pretty fast cus they're having fun with the relationship. This specific set of translyrics reads to me like a bit of self-victimizing as well like "oh, I'm so tortured by feeling like a bad person because of the way I treat you. But I love you so you don't really have a choice but to forgive me."

Speaking of translyrics this is where Micchi's version comes in. While I ADORE Rachie and Anthong's version I do have some nitpicks..? And one of those that I am unreasonably pet peeved by is this right here.

In the original JP version, the lyric is simply kimi mo vampire, meaning simply You're (also) a Vampire. It's alot more obvious a change and hits harder imo than "My little Vampire" which still puts the singer in the position of power.

Micchi's version of the lyrics on the other hand stick a lot closer to the original

And I might just be imagining this but there seems to be a switch in the power dynamic in this version as well. The singer is now inviting their partner to be "rough" with them and the repeating mantra of "you're the ONLY ONE for me" sounds more desperate than anything else.

Micchi's lyrics in general are a bit more wet cat coded. I still prefer Rachie's as a whole but Micchi's singer definitely seems to be more regretful of what they've done and blame themselves for essentially turning their partner into a different, more hostile person. (aka turning them into a vampire lol)

In a lot of ways the vampire metaphor is really unsubtle. Bloodsucking parasite attaches themselves to someone and turns them into a bloodsucking parasite as well.

SO HOW THE FUCK DID I GET GRAIN AND SCOOTER FROM THIS WELL.....

When I think about 3L one of the main things that lights up the lightbulb in my mind is the parallels between all of the four "main" partnerships, with Renchantyn vs Desert Duo as the most obvious comparison point but I think they all mirror and subvert each other really well.

Grian/Scott are like birds of a feather to me in a similar sense that Scott/Cleo are, but while Scott and Cleo have this mutual understanding with each other with Grian it's a bit more complicated.

I CAN't. FOR THE LIFE OF ME. FIND IT AGAIN bUT there was a bit in Third Life when Scott said to Grian "and maybe once our husbands are dead we can be free" and Grian laughs and that basically inspired this Whole Thing 🙏🙏

(an apology for all the wholesome flower husbands shippers who i know follow me cus im about to unleash my full toxic yaoi adaptation of them) (desert duo fans from what ive seen are already insane so you're okay)

In my own mind Grian and Scott are both somewhat.. manipulative? Might be a bit harsh of a word? But they definitely play to survive more than some of the other people stuck in there with them. (cleo too but she sucks at it and she can get her character analysis essay next week)

At least in my view, their partnerships with Jimmy and Scar respectively were born more out of a need for safety in numbers and to get someone to essentially keep them safe until they're no longer of use. Grian definitely felt bad about creeper-ing Scar in the first episode but I don't think he was quite expecting to spend the whole series in debt to him 😭😭

Scott (like the singer in the song oh my god) isn't really a monster so to speak, just someone who has a messed up view of love. Probably has some sort of tragic backstory that explains the way he is that we'll get to see in the anime adaptation idk. He does care for Jimmy but in like.. the way someone might care for and love a pet. You LOVE your dog to fucking death but you wouldn't like.. trust your dog with taxes or respect its autonomy.

also these lyrics are both hilarious to me considering the uh current brainrot.

Grian on the other hand probably Wants to be like Scott and be able to have someone wrapped around his fingers like that but he can't cus it's Scar not Jimmy and he's Grian and not Scott. I imagine he'd get tired of Scar's shenanigans when he's with him but as soon as he's left the room it's all why's it so quiet D: where's scar D:

I like to think that everytime he THINKS he has a handle on Scar finally and can actually stand a chance to survive this thing Scar does something completely unhinged off the wall and Grian's like WAIT WAIT WAIT NO

basically he gets way too attached and doesn't like it and to make it worse he has no idea wtf is going thru Scar's head👍

SO when they eventually team up I think Scott and Grian would have this little "wink wink nudge nudge they don't know" kinda thing going on.

and then in my little fanfiction world somewhere along the line Scott would end up sensing that Oh, We're actually not exactly the same.. interesting.. and kind of start looking at Grian with this sense of amusement/pity cus aww, look at you getting all attached to the person you were planning to betray, that's so cute and Grian would see the worst of himself reflected back to him via Scott. It ends up strengthening Desert Duo's relationship if anything else.

Of course then Jimmy dies and Scott's emotionally destroyed by it but he's still like.. skirting around it. I'd like to think he gaslights himself with any genuine Emotions he has cus like.. he knew this was coming, this is all according to plan, so why would he feel anything for him now that he's gone?

While Scott gets some time to come to terms with the fact that he actually cared about Jimmy too late for him to repair their relationship Grian and Scar end up punching eachother to death in a cactus ring. The End 👍

tl;dr i need to pick up writing fanfics cus oh my god

[arcplaysgames]

DAWN OF THE FINAL DAY, TIME TO BEAT SOME ASS

Magatsu Inaba is by far the best dungeon. The best ambient music for sure, and also just annoying in interesting ways. Adachi has a lot more control over the place than previous folks did, which leads up nicely to the revelation about him that we all saw coming.

There's a point where he's like "let's play a game! get thru this level without getting in any fights!" and it was so fucking irritating, i got booted out of his world twice trying, and like... that's a fun trick, to have the mechanics of a place be more hostile so you dislike Adachi even more. Also, the level where you have to follow the spiral all the way to the middle, passing or fighting about 8 shadows? goddamn fucking bullshit. I hate Adachi, he's amazing.

WHEN I TELL YOU I LAUGHED OUT LOUD

OH GOD I FIGURED IT OUT he's like dime store Handsome Jack. he doesn't nearly have the swagger, but because that swag is not so Off The Chart Bonkers like Handsome Jack, he seems like less of a poser than Jack? So it actually works really well. Adachi is just enough of a total bitch that he can still back it up. He's a delightful villain!

Like literally if you removed the tacked-on stupid sexism (WHICH WEIRDLY? THEY DO? IT DOESN'T COME UP AGAIN REALLY AFTER HIS INITIAL REVEAL) he's a top five villain. Huge fan of this odious little bastardman.

B R U H

Adachi, I love you, you're such a shit

Which, I am cackling, but narratively, he works phenomenally well for his position in opposition to the seekers of truth. Oh yeah sure he's the killer, but also he is going to drop some hard fucking realities on your plate while he's at it. Yeah, many cops are bullies who go into the force to get access to power. Yeah, the public will be angry at the revelation that Namatame isn't the killer. People want specific truths to become reality, and that is what has fueled the Midnight Channel all this time.

HE'S GREAT. TEN OUTTA TEN. Well, nine. The weird "bitches and whores" thing was so odd, glad they left it behind now.

As far as dumbass Assimilation Plots go, this one is better than most.

Okay so I seriously way overleveled for this game's difficulty, but even so I love the Adachi fight. After seeing everyone's Shadows as these huge weird unleashed id-creatures, going into combat against just a guy, that was really way more effective and menacing. Also his idle animations are great. Adachi will stare at whoever is up next and every few seconds he just has a hysterical laughing fit behind his hand. It's AMAZING, he's so creepy and cracked.

Also as I expected, this bitch got a Persona. Which makes sense! He has faced his inner self and his reward is a Persona, which seems to be the Magatsu Izanagi that was hinted at in his maxed-out SLink I glimpsed in the other ending.

So not only does he have Reverie's power, not old is he a Wild Card, he also has the same persona but Disaster-flavored.

Sadly he's really not a difficult fight. I would have killed to have an Adachi with multiple persona, but that would necessitate questions about him and the Velvet Room, blah blah.

ANYWAY HE'S GREAT.

pats Adachi on the head as condescendingly as i possibly can

OH BUT LEST YOU WORRY THAT YOU'D GET THROUGH A PERSONA GAME WITHOUT A BIG NIGHTMARE EYEBALL BOSS, WE AIN'T DONE YET

[postgleeworld]

u see my hate towards dxton wouldn’t exist this much if they were so awful towards jaren cuz one one thing is hating ben but another is mocking his appearance because comments like “devi keeps getting all this hot love interests to be end up w that ugly man” like i get you all put looks over reasoning but let’s be decent human beings. jaren does nothing to be insulted this way and maitreyi will hate them all.

yeahhh no i get you 100%. there are so many things that diehard d*xtons say that......just rub me the wrong way and feel very gross lmfao. i don't really go out looking for their posts but every now and then i'll come across something in the nhie tag that is just. either braindead or straight up wrong or they just sound like a straight up asshole. and like to be fair i'll be the first to admit i'm not entirely an innocent party bc i have posted my fair share of mean things before but like!!!! idk the difference i see with a lot of benvi shippers vs d*xton shippers is like.....a lot of us genuinely like paxton as a character, even love him, and we love the arc he's had!!! not to be all "blah blah media literacy blah blah" but we don't willfully misinterpret his actions in the show, especially his negative actions, as being "abusive" or "toxic" or whatever just because he reacted like a normal teenager would. we don't hate on the actor for his looks - the only comment on his appearance i'll make is that he is visibly much older than maitreyi - because he is older, and i definitely think they should have cast a younger actor to play paxton, but that's not a dig at darren's appearance bc he's still very much conventionally attractive, it's just that he's, well, 32 as opposed to maitreyi's 21 and jaren's 22.

also like, they act as if jaren isn't attractive which confuses me so much? i may not be into men as a whole but even i can see that he's also a conventionally attractive guy. hot, cute, sexy, whatever you wanna say - he is all of those things! and so is darren! i don't care if you're trying to "defend your ship" or whatever (a ship that has effectively sunk at least as of 3x10 and, if we're being honest, earlier than that), you leave people's appearances out of it lol.

i think d*xton was cute, when they were together. i think they were a sweet short-term high school relationship. i think devi needed to explore that relationship with him in order to let herself fully move past that fantasy she had. i don't hate the ship itself - i just really very strongly dislike a majority of its shippers, for many many many reasons, the ben and jaren bashing just being one of them

[whore-tm]

1) i swear i thought i was following this blog already😭?? 2) ok so im going to detract a little more the skam austin context bc frankly i don't rmbr much BUT i feel like the point zoya/the writers were trying to touch on was .

Well let's use makeup as an example: if we were to say 'everybody wear whatever makes you comfortable because ur doing it for urself!!!' (not a bad statement! i (largely) agree w it!) it would certainly empower some people make them comfortable when going out, like some people would feel like they were able to stop feeling like they had to wear make up at all, others would feel very confident to do rlly detailed looks in public, and another group would continue to wear make up all the time bc they don't feel comfortable in their own skin.

The problem w the 'everybody wear what You want!!' statement comes when some people from the large group refuse to acknowledge that the reason they feel like they have to wear makeup all the time is because society made them feel inferior without it specifically because the current society (heavily influenced by the patriarchy blah blah) decided women look better with fuller lips, their eyes look bigger/more attractive with eyeliner, red rosy cheeks makes them look younger etcetc you get the idea. SO basically lots of women for centuries did this to look beautiful which attracted men and yadda yadda ..........

SO BASICALLY in my opinion zoya's comment implying that the lipstick AustinNoora wore, the tight clothes she wore etc all may have been worn w the Intention of 'i’m doing this for myself! bc i feel good! not for men!' but that AustinNoora failed to recognize lipstick is popular for women bc they look more attractive to men bc it draws attention to the lips, tight clothes are attractive to men bc it shows off the body and leaves men wanting more/leaves them something to think abt etcetc....

w the comment of 'you Should wear loose clothes' etc i feel like zoya was saying 'if you really believed in the feminism you preach, you would recognize that some things women conventionally wear like make up did originate for the male gaze' not that she was actually telling her to dress a certain way...

SO ALL IN ALL my thoughts is wear whatever obviously but kinda do it consciously yk. like am i wearing makeup bc i like how it looks on me or am i wearing it bc i know men will flirt w me and i like when i have their attention (wearing makeup on a night out to get attention from men [assuming ur straight] isn't necessarily the problem, but if your Primary intention is that, regardless of whether or not you like the way u look in make up... that's a problem !)

IDK! if that made the most sense but that's my take on it ??? Also SOOOO sorry if i overexplained something u already knew 😭😭😭 i usually explain things to my younger siblings so i have to make sure to include even little details bc they don't know it LOL. this obviously isn't The Right Opinion but it's my read on what zoya was trying to say informed by my opinion.

(ALSO SORRY THIS IS SO LONG😭😭😭😭😭)

sfkjdslfjs dont worry!!!! all good!!! it's just a sideblog lmao

no no thank you actually for going into detail on this. that makes a lot of sense and i think i just didn't think the one step further but you explained it really well! i guess i was just thrown off by Zoya's wording cos it was just a bit... drastic lmao. "wear whatever obviously but kinda do it consciously" yeah she's asking whether AustinNoora actually does it for herself and not unconsciously does it for men.... that's obviously an important question

thank u for explaining 🧡🧡