#which is worrying because they're all awful people but i forgive him :)

[lepakonpaska]

so captivated by them. unfortunately

[theaceace]

While Dream was hanging out in the fishbowl, a few dreams and nightmares that (like the rest of the Dreaming) think Hob would be the best thing to happen to Dream in a long time and also that Dream has abandoned them all, go and start bothering Hob in the waking world

But because they're dreams and nightmares, it kind of manifests as (usually awful) hallucinations. Specifically of Dream, a lot of the time (look they're trying to get their lord's attention by needling his human, yes it's stupid, no they don't have any better ideas)

And Hob, with the same attitude that's carried him through 600-odd years is like 'well I guess immortal life is already so goddamn weird this might as well happen' and just rolls with the fact that he is having hallucinations now. Learns some coping mechanisms, gets really good at not reacting to them even when horrible terrible things are happening

So when Dream finally does get back and goes to see Hob, he's just like oh cool I'm seeing things again, thought I got over that like ten years ago, ah well got a lecture to finish, better get on with it and barely even glances at Dream

Dream, of course, reacts to this like 🥺 like the sad wet cat he is, but also maybe this is a bad time. His friend is shaping young minds, he's very important and busy, Dream can come back later

So he pops back into Hob's life that evening when most people are, if not asleep, then at least at home. Hob's in the New Inn (of course) but it's quiet enough that Dream thinks maybe Hob will talk to him this time

Absolutely nothing. Like sitting across from a brick wall (and because Dream tends not to be noticed if he wants, and he very much doesn't want to be perceived while he begs forgiveness from a mortal, people's eyes just kind of skim over him, which isn't helping with Hob's assumption that he's a figment of Hob's imagination)

Dream is feeling very, very cold. None of the gentle things he's been saying to Hob have got anymore reaction than his hand tightening slightly around his marking pen (Hob is waiting for something horrible to happen, as it so often used to when he imagined his stranger, and is getting more and more tense the longer it doesn't)

Eventually they're the only ones left, even the bar staff have gone home because it's Hob's pub and he has a set of keys. So finally, FINALLY Hob looks up and is like 'oh, you're still here. We're still doing this, then' flatly

Dream: I thought I might - (he was going to say apologise) Hob: yes alright get on with it, the sooner you start the sooner you can piss off again (thinking this is a vision here to torment him) Dream: ...very well. I understand, and you need not worry, I shall not trouble you further. Only, let me ask, one final time: do you still wish to live? Hob: (well it's never gone down like this before, at least I'm getting some variety in my waking nightmares) what sort of bloody stupid question is that, obviously yes! Dream: I am. Pleased to hear that. Goodbye, Robert Gadling

So off he goes, leaving a bottle of wine that he pinched out of someone's dreams on the table. Hob scoffs, rolls his eyes and goes to bed

And panics the next day when one of the bar staff asks where the super fancy wine came from, and also who his friend was last night, didn't get a good look at him, but I don't think I've seen him before?

There Hob is. Screaming internally, because he's only gone and fucked it all up and now he's NEVER going to see his friend again

(obviously he does, probably because one of the nightmares finally confesses what they did to Lucienne, who tells Matthew, who speaks both fluent Dumb Human and Dramatic Fucker Dreamlord and manages to get the two of them in the same room long enough to talk it out)

[celestial-quill-n-ink]

What They Think Of You (Season 1):

🎮Leviathan🎮

✦ To be honest, Levi pretty much forgot that the Human Exchange Student was going to be arriving that day. I mean, he had so many more important things to worry about, so what reason would he have to care about a simple human?

✦ …Actually… He could use this to his advantage. Would it be petty? Maybe, but it would serve Mammon right for being such a scummy brother!

✦ And surprisingly enough, his plan worked! But despite what his brothers were insinuating, he didn't care for you in any way! Not at all! Not one bit!

✦ It's not like he was practically living within one of his favourite anime tropes, having become the unsuspecting onlooker to a real life isekai! An innocent human suddenly thrust into a world of magic and demons! An instantly compelling setup that had made him fall in love with many a main characters…

✦ But regardless of any of that!!! He was just a stinky Otaku who gamed his days away in the comfort of his room. There was no need for him to get involved with whatever daredevil antics the human and his scummy brother were bound to get up to.

✦ …That wasn't going to be as easy as he wanted, however.

✦ Because this human just didn't know when to quit! I mean, why do they get to have so much fun binging TSL and then act so confident as if they know what they're talking about? It just wasn't fair.

✦ And now here he was, standing in front of a terrifyingly large crowd in the main hall of RAD, just to prove to one singular prideful human that he was the ultimate TSL fan!

✦ …He really didn't want to hurt them. He honestly felt downright awful after his outburst. But most of all, he felt defeated.

✦ Did he believe that you cheated during the TSL Showdown? …Kind of, yeah. Actually, yeah, he did think it was a scummy thing to do!

✦ But… it's not like he was in a position to have the rarest of merch or all the insider details of his favourite story. And that's simply because he was a shut-in. He keeps to himself and he never tries to interact with others.

✦ Whether he likes it or not, you got the advantages and opportunities you had because you actually interacted with people and made your own impression on them.

✦ And that made him so jealous.

✦ So he agreed to the pact. He conceded that you had something that he didn't, despite how desperately he did want it.

✦ And then you apologised to him. For using dirty tactics to get your way, because you would feel the exact way he did if someone tried to do that with your favourite pieces of media.

✦ …Wait, what???

✦ You actually enjoyed video games and anime too? Just like him??? ...I mean, maybe he could forgive you, but that didn't make you two best friends or anything!!!

✦ Spoiler Alert: It definitely did to him.

✦ He actually got to know you on a deeper level, watching how you'd interact with his brothers, like you were just always meant to fit with them. These… misfit fallen angels that they were.

✦ And the craziest thing of all was that you actually wanted to hang out with him!!! You wanted to share your favourite Human World anime and manga with him, and soon enough (way faster than he was ever willing to admit), he did the same for you with Devildom media.

✦ Which was all fine and dandy, sunshine and rainbows, but why in all of the three realms did his brothers have to be so obnoxious about you? Constantly vying for your attention, while you argued that you'd already scheduled this time for you and him.

✦ And wow, did hearing that pacify his envy quicker than any of the anime merch he's ever bought…

[hastalavistabyebye]

I don't really know what to do of Anakin. I should definitely watch the movies again sure. But the thing still is that people's opinions on him are mostly divided on two categories :

-the people that give him full responsibility for everything he did and hate him for it (not talking about Vader, just Anakin)

-the people that consider he wasn't completely responsible for x, y, z reason and he was first and foremost a victim

Basically apologists against haters (on the loose term of the sense, not fandom haters).

And I understand both point of views really. Because he did awful things, he killed those tuskens, he struggled enough with the Jedi way to let his anger and worry win during Ahsoka's emprisonment and escape, he has a problem with order of priority and Padme and him should go see a therapist on the sole ground of how toxic their relationship is. Vader wasn't born in one day, and all that. But Anakin IS also caring and kind hearted and passionate, every single person he loved saw him as a kind and good man (which he was), he got out of his way to help people, even ones that were often considered as less important like droids etc, he tried his best.

He is both of those, he has all of those contradictions.

And I think it all comes down to the level of responsibility we should give him for his crimes (before Vader). And I'm not taking a justice kind of approach. I'm taking a blorbo approach. The "sure he killed people but is it that bad" approach. The "can he be redeemed in a fandom way" side of things. The same approach that made the fandom forgive Fox for killing Fives and dooming both his people and the Jedi at the same time.

So. Is Anakin completely responsible of his actions ? That's the question I've been wondering about.

Because it all comes down to one thing : how much influence did Palpatine have on him ? How much of his actions were his deliberate own choices and how much it was Palpatine whispering in his ear since the tender age of 9 year old freshly freed slave with a very particular experience on life and of what is fair and what isn't.

And it's a complicated question because he also had the Jedi's influence at the very same time.

And he knows the way of the Jedi since he was able to teach it to Ahsoka, who grew up in the temple surrounded by Jedi for as long as she can remember. So he knew all the ordeal. So he should have seen the Tuskens as people and not continue to see them as animals like he did when he was on Tatooine as a child. So he knew what the fuck he was doing when he killed them.

And the way he treated the Coruscant Guard is strange because it is so different than the way he acts with the clones he knows and is closed to and care for (Highlighting those words because they're very important for me regarding Anakin : he cares so much for the people he likes and knows, but does he respect and care to people he doesn't know the same way ? Not as strongly of course, but still, the "Jedi" way if you will) It just seems so very possible that Palpatine's influence have something to do with it. That he was influenced to believe, to keep believing that they are people that aren't as important, as worthy of attention and respect or whatever.

How much was it his very own, responsible choices ? How much was it someone murmuring in his ear and enabling his darker emotions and desires ? His hatred and disdain and possessiveness ? How much was it just him refusing to accept completely the Jedi's beliefs and how much was it Sidious blurring the differences ? Why didn't Anakin completely outgrew his kidvision of the Jedi as invisible heroes ?

How much did Sidious messed with his brain ?

And I don't have an answer ! I can't pinpoint what is his driving force, where his morals are, how much comes from him and how much comes from the litteral sith master and master Manipulator TM who he sees as a grandfather.

What are the Jedi influence and Sith influence proportions in the strange soup of his mind ??

It's bugging me so much.

[lovely-showtimes]

Hello! Can I request this.. sekai boys x reader who is afraid of doctors/hospitals?

Thank you in advance, have a nice day! <3

hospitals.

characters - akito, toya.

type - scenario.

contains - reader is stated to have anxiety, because ... well, i do, and i can best describe being scared of something if i use my own experiences, if that makes sense.

a/n - thank you, nonnie!! i hope you have a wonderful day as well <3 i was gonna just make these hcs but i thought maybe a small drabble would work better? also i'm sorry that it's only akito & toya, i truly couldn't think of anything interesting for tsukasa & rui (╥﹏╥) please forgive me ...

It's just a check-up. I'll be fine.

Those were the words you told yourself repeatedly as you pace around your living room, trying to ignore the pit of anxiety in your stomach.

It's fine. Just like always, they'll tell me everything is fine, and then I'll go back home. It won't be as bad as I'm expecting.

Yet, no matter how much you tried to reason with yourself, your fears stayed present in your mind, gnawing at you and making your anxiety even worse.

While you were pacing around, lost in thought, Akito reenters the room once more. He was holding the glass of water you'd asked him to get for you a few moments ago.

He sighs, placing the glass down on the table and walking over to you.

"Oi. Stop pacing like that. You're not making yourself feel any better, you know?" He places his hands on your shoulders firmly and gently spins you around to face him.

"But I can't stop thinking about it." You rub your face and groan quietly.

Akito frowns and lets go of you once more. He can't stand to see you like this, but Akito has never been particularly good at comforting people, especially when they're anxious like this. Hell, he doesn't even know how to cope with it when it happens to himself...

"You know what," he speaks after a few moments of silent contemplation, "After the visit's over, do you wanna come to this cafe nearby? It could be something else for you to think about instead of the visit, I guess."

You lift your head in surprise. "That's... That's actually a great idea, 'Kito!! Thank you!!"

You throw your arms around him in a sudden hug, causing him to stumble backwards slightly. He soon steadies himself forever, and hugs you in return.

"It's nothing, really," he chuckles lightly. "I'm just glad you don't seem as worried anymore."

You exhale loudly, tapping your foot absentmindedly on the carpeted floors. Currently, you were hanging around the arcade with your boyfriend, Toya.

Well, you were supposed to be. He had gone off... somewhere. You could guess where, but seeing as you don't go to the arcade often, you're not sure where to go to seek him out.

You sigh again, fidgeting with your shirt. Toya took you here because he wanted you to have a nice time before you had to go for your check-up, you were aware of that. But your fears clawed at you, making you unable to enjoy the atmosphere.

You begin wandering around, searching for Toya. Maybe if you're with him, you could relax a little. Maybe...

It took quite a while of aimless wandering (you could have just called him and asked where he was, but that would mean admitting you were lost... which you would very much prefer to avoid), but you found him eventually.

Toya was right where you expected to find him, at the claw machine. He was utterly engrossed in the game, a level of concentration you didn't often see from him.

You took a few quiet steps closer, eyes wide in awe. You hadn't ever actually seen him play this before, and it was strangely mesmerizing, despite how simple the gameplay was.

Before you knew it, Toya had gained yet another plushie from the machine. He carefully drops it into the bag he'd placed beside the machine and goes to input another coin to play again.

"Ah, Toya," you hurry over to stop him from spending all his money on crane games. "I've been looking for you. I-I have to go soon, so..."

You trail off, averting your gaze. You wish you didn't have to go, but there was nothing you could do to. You had to go at some point...

"Ah, yes. I'd forgotten about that." Toya picks up the bag of plushies he'd obtained (wow, there was way more in that bag than you'd originally thought) and holds it out to you. A soft smile appears on his face.

"Here. I got these for you."

You slowly take the bag from him in bewilderment. Did he really just come here so he could get a bunch of plushies for you...? It was a fairly good idea on his part, to be honest... It's an easy way to get lots of plushies for relatively little amounts of money.

Your eyes made contact with a particular bunny plushie in the bag. Somehow, its cute little face managed to temporarily make you forget about your fears.

"Toya, you're too sweet!" You quickly meet his eyes once more and beam. "Thank you for all this, you're the best!"

Toya's smile grows. "It's nothing, really. C'mon, we should get going."

[omennatural]

Have we considered the possibility that Crowley goes to Heaven without Aziraphale's knowledge?

Forgive me if anyone's talked about this before, I've not personally seen anything and I have to talk about it because oh my God, the possibilities.

We see Muriel and Crowley in Heaven, and he seems quite smug about it when he transforms back into his regular outfit. He's (assumingly) just infiltrated Heaven, done what he was there to do, and waltzed right out without being made. I'd be smug too. But, we're all so focused on the simple fact Crowley is fucking in Heaven again, and that awful, lovable outfit with his little gold snake tattoo, I am too, but what if Aziraphale doesn't know they're doing this? I think there's three likely scenarios afoot:

They've done this without Aziraphale's knowledge. We know through set photos that Aziraphale does go out in his little detective? outfit, hat and briefcase, so it's possible he may be looking for clues on his own. It'd be like him to enjoy the mystery, get into the hunt and go all out. If he's gone, either Crowley and Muriel made this plan when he's out, or they've made it in a spur of the moment decision and said we can't tell Aziraphale or he'll freak out. Whatever it is, if he doesn't know, then just imagine how he'll react when he does find out.

Aziraphale knows and doesn't like it. Which, even in this case, it'll still be a delicious bit of Aziraphale pouting and/or whining about not wanting to put Crowley in harm's way.

Aziraphale is the one who suggests it, as a last resort deal because he's clearly not welcome in Heaven. I find this the least likely case because they've only got Muriel on their side, an angel they can't trust like they trust each other, and if say Micheal or Uriel makes him, it's likely he could be killed. That alone would have Aziraphale against a plan like that. No choice, and all that, if they need two people for the Heaven Heist bit, but still less likely in my opinion.

I could be very wrong, either he knows beforehand or not, but it's the minor details in what Aziraphale thinks of the plan that makes it so different. We've only seen 2 minutes of 6 hours, there's so much more to everything and this is limited knowledge speculation, but it's keeping me up at night because in the trailer, it seems that things are coming to a head with Aziraphale's feelings for Crolwey, and it seems he may be denying it hard, but if part of his growth this season is how he deals with his feelings, then this could definitely be a point on that line of growth–confronting/denying why he's (again, assumingly) worried about Crowley.

[antiquepearlss]

If I ever get around to it, I'd love to write novels/make comics about Greek mythology. But, I'm busy. I've always wanted to write about Hades and Persephone since people are so divided on them and their relationship. Either they're couple goals, or it's an abusive and awful marriage. And Demeter almost always gets villainaized or seen as weak in various interpretations.

So here's what I would do if I wrote about Hades and Persephone...

Persephone isn't that young, Zeus and Demeter made her before Zeus even married Hera, so she's old. (Persephone actually predates Hades in history) but stays with her mother. (They're very close) Part of her character is that she doesn't really want to grow up, she just wants to stay an unknown nature goddess, but she also desires something more deep down. (she's not goddess of spring, spring doesnt exist yet) Demeter also doesn't want Kore to grow up and doesn't like change. She is happy with her life with her daughter. Demeter is also against marriage since she has seen so many marriages fall apart.

Hades and Kore meet when Hades visits Demeter. The two become instant friends and Hades develops a crush on Kore due to her quiet and contemplative but dark and morbid nature. And that she loves the fact that he rules the underworld. Kore begins to fancy him because she has always been fascinated with the underworld, and she finds his introverted and morbid and shy personality cute. Hades becomes part of the reason Kore begins to desire something more with her life. (At this point Demeter and Persephone are still worshipped as a duo, just like in history)

Demeter and Hades don't hate eachother but they're not very close. She knows of their relationship but encourages (not forces!) Kore to drop the crush because of what she's seen happen to Hera. Kore begins to bottle her feelings and is conflicted by her love for her mother and her desire to stay with her and not change anything, and her desire to be with Hades or to be her own goddess.

Kore confides her feelings to Hades and since Hades has never had anyone love him, he decides to ask Zeus for Kores hand in marriage. Zeus agrees, Hades wants to ask Demeter because he respects Demeter and Kores relationship. Zeus convinces Hades not to because he thinks Demeter will deny it and Hades agrees.

Artemis and Athena visit Demeter and Kore and whilst picking flowers, Kore runs off to pick a narcissus flower (Hades used this flower because it's Kores favorite) Hades comes out of the earth all dramatically and kidnaps Kore.

Kore is obviously distraught and does not accept Hades' marriage proposal. Instead of sleeping in his room she holes herself up in one of the dungeons in protest. Hades tries to bring her various gifts (jewelry, fancy clothes, pets, wilting flowers,) but he refuses to give her what she really wants, to go back home.

Hades wants to return her but he's worried she will leave him, so selfishly, everytime she asks to go home, he just brings her a lavish gift. I'd write him having a mental battle, where he wants Kore to be happy but he also wants Kore to be happy with him.

Hades tries again to make Kore happy. She comments on one of his visits that the underworld is unfair to those who did good in life, so he let's her create Elysium. Kore is moved by this gesture and eventually moves out of the dungeon and into Elysium and helps to judge which of the dead will get to move to Elysium.

After this, Kore decides to accept Hades' proposal of being Queen of the Underworld, but continues to refuse his marriage proposal. She begins to grow up and changes her name to Persephone. She enjoys judging mortals but becomes harsh with her judgement. Word begins to spread of how fearsome she is. She doesn't hate Hades and doesn't forgive him, but can manage to stay in the same room as him for more than ten minutes. She's finally fulfilled her wish of becoming more than just a nature goddess.

Hecate comes down to the underworld and talks to Hades. She tells him how selfish and cruel he is. Hades' character flaw in this story is his self centeredness. He thinks he knows what's best for Kore and that the second he let's her go, she will hate him, and he will be left alone for eternity. He's too selfish to realize how he's hurting her, and that his pain isn't more important than hers. He begins to realize these flaws through Hecates speech and realizing that he doesn't want Persephone to be miserable because of him.

Meanwhile, Demeter is incredibly distraught. She lost her daughter and Artemis and Athena didn't see what happened. Demeter spends days looking for her until Hecate takes her to Helios who sees everything. He tells Demeter that Zeus arranged the marriage and tries to convince her that maybe Hades would be a good husband but Demeter is having none of it (rightfully so) she angrily destroys the home and land she and Kore lived in, where most of the gods' food came from. Now Zeus is cut off from the best food.

Demeter repeatedly goes to Zeus but he refuses to annul the marriage. She goes to Hera who's her closest friend but Hera sides with Zeus, seeing that Hades and Kore would make a very good couple. Obviously Demeter is angry that the three of them conspired behind her and her daughters back. She refuses to grow more food for them and cuts off her and Heras friendship.

She goes to Hecate and Hecate tells her she will try to convince Hades to give Kore up.

Demeter travels to a nearby town and disguises herself as a servant and begins to care for the child of her "owners" she sees Kore in this child and grants them immortality by throwing them into a fire every night. Obv the parents object to this but she reveals herself to them, and in apology for their reaction and in pity for her condition, they build her a new temple. Hera will try to talk to Demeter but Demeter refuses to have anything to do with her.

Hecate comes to Demeter with the news of Persephone and how she is becoming the accustomed to being queen and her new name change. Demeter is upset by this and worries that she may lose Kore forever.

Demeter causes winter, this is her final card in getting Kore back. As the mortals die and he sees how upset Demeter is, Zeus begins to take pity on her, but is angered by the death of the mortals and doesn't budge on his decision. Hera decides to back Demeter up and begs Zeus to let Demeter have Kore back. When Zeus realizes how genuine Hera is Zeus, and how badly he hurt Demeter, and that Demeter will not budge, he relents. Zeus sends Hermes to convince Hades to let Persephone go.

Hades by this point is ready to let Persephone go and be happy, but Persephone wants to stay queen of the underworld. She learns to love her home and enjoys being able to help the dead mortals and punish the wicked ones. She is reluctant to go back home and just be some nature goddess. She doesn't want to be Kore, she wants to be Persephone. But she still hasn't forgiven Hades at this point and isn't sure if she still loves him. And while she loves the underworld, she misses her mother and wants to calm her down. Shes conflicted, but wants to see her mother at least one more time. She makes all this clear to Hermes and Hades overhears.

Hades finally realizes what he must do, and he agrees to let Persephone go to see her mother. He gives Persephone the pomegranate seeds and lets her decide whether or not she wants to be bound to the underworld. Persephone is moved by this gesture and kisses him on the cheek. Showing she forgives him.

Persephone travels to her mother. Demeter is so happy she immediately causes spring. A new season which is bright and colorful, but rainy due to her tears and slightly chill due to how emotional she is. Demeter vows to protect Persephone and to build her temples and wants to devote this new season to her.

Persephone is overjoyed to see her mother but eventually (I'm thinking like, a week after) she tells Demeter about how she ate the seeds, and she needs to go to the underworld.

Demeter is not happy.

The two go to Zeus and he decides that since Perse only ate six seeds, she will only stay six months in the underworld. Demeter objects and keeps begging Persephone to ask Zeus for an annulment. She doesn't want things to change for her and Kore. And she doesn't really want Kore to grow up yet, or be miserable in an unloving marriage.

Demeter and Persephone have a conversation on how Persephone has grown up and that she doesn't want to stay a nature goddess forever. That she forgives Hades and does want to be around him. Demeter eventually relents and accepts that Persephone has grown up and is happy for her. She realizes that things eventually change and people move on. And right before Persephone goes back down to the underworld, she gives Persephone the title of the Goddess Of Spring.

Demeter is still upset when Persephone leaves and causes winter due to her grief. But as the years go on, she creates fall, to better help humans adjust to the cold. Nowadays, Persephone leaving isn't as jarring and she doesn't need to cause winter, but humans have gotten so accustomed to it that they need it for their cycle of seasons.

Eventually, Persephone accepts Hades marriage proposal and falls in love with him. He tries to make up for the pain he caused her by making her an equal ruler, and promising to be the best husband he can be to her.

The end.

Holy heck this was long. But yeah, this is how I'd turn The Hymn To Demeter into a novel. I'm tired of everyone interpreting this story as having a clear "bad guy" either Hades is an evil cruel man and Demeter is a spineless grieving mother, or Dem is an overprotective and abusive mother and Hades is a spineless uwu innocent boy.

No, Demeter is a loving mother averse to change, Hades is a selfish but well meaning guy, and Persephone is a woman who is conflicted in her desire to grow up.

When I write these novels I don't plan on changing any of the details in the myths, just add more and make them a full fledged story. The only thing I "changed" in this is that Perse ate the seeds willingly. It's kinda mixed on whether she knew what they would do but in this she does, it's important to her development.

Obviously nowadays forgiving Hades would be unspeakable, but remember, this was ancient Greece. So it was looked down by some but not all. So he's not a complete monster because of this. But its still not okay. So to all the Hades simps and apologists, he was not justified in kidnapping Persephone. No matter the context. And he still needs to overcome his flaws like the rest of them. Don't kidnap your wife kids.

[mellohirust]

In the dark timeline, what do you think would happen if Neil Gaiman wrote it so Aziraphale and Crowley didn’t reunite and reconcile in S3? 👀

In the infinite sunshine timeline, how would everyone react if S3 was just South Downs fluff?

Finally, what’s a plot twist nobody would see coming?

OK OK putting my good omens thoughts under the cut because we're gonna be here a while. strap in.

-Dark timeline where they don't reunite and reconcile is admittedly VERY hard to envision. They've always relied on each other in some capacity whether they like it or not (literally their FIRST INTERACTION before the beginning is Crowley needing Aziraphale's help). I'd imagine Aziraphale would have a LOT to sort out on his own, and it would not be easy at all for him, if even possible given the circumstances. He'd have the whole Second Coming to handle (and also hope he can somehow thwart), all while Heaven is likely watching like a HAWK, all while he wouldn't want to be doing any of it at all. For the first time in thousands of years he'd be truly alone, and I doubt he'd have a plan that would feel reliable. It would be awful. There's only so much a single angel can do. The Book of Life is also a very real threat. Falling is also something he's still worried about. He'd have to get VERY lucky. I doubt he could just sway the Metatron into a different opinion (although I'm sure he'll try). I think he's pretty fucked unless God were to intervene and look out for him.

Not that he'd be satisfied in the end, even if the world was saved and everything was fine. He'd never forgive himself if he didn't reconcile with Crowley by the end of things, I'd imagine.

I also think Crowley would never shake the feeling of something being wrong, even if Aziraphale doesn't reach out to him for help (which... come on. He will. Where else could he go?). He always expected a "big one", he just doesn't know when or where it'll happen, but obviously Heaven would need Aziraphale for SOMETHING. They wanted to erase Gabriel's memories because he refused to do Armageddon 2.0! Do you really think that's gonna stop them? That they won't just try again? Their whole deal is that they're insistent on this. They won't let up. That's not gonna change no matter who's in charge, and he knows it. I can't see Crowley giving up on Earth until it's too late, maybe abandoning ship last second as to avoid his own demise, but it's a question as to what he could piece together on his own, whether or not Hell would still tell him things, etc when it comes to what he'd actually try to achieve. After all, you can't thwart what you don't know the details of. It would be a lost cause. (Personally, I don't see him becoming a Duke of Hell either; it's something I can enjoy in fanworks but I don't see him as the type to take that deal even to 'spite Aziraphale' in canon. Not unless he hoped to get intel? But I think he'd much rather not have them watching him.)

Could either of them thwart the Second Coming on their own or with others besides each other? Very, very unlikely, and it would be a very close call, and probably still entail other sorts of disaster. Could they do it without crossing paths at least once? Also very unlikely. (After all, the entire driving force of S1/the book is how many people come together for Armageddon in attempts to either start or stop it). If they work at this and want to stand a chance they're doomed to reunite, and therefore, doomed to reconcile. They would quite literally have to be exterminated or wiped out of the Book of Life in order to never reunite (and I just don't think this is that kind of story). Make of this what you will.

(I also can't see them just being able to go back to before their feelings were revealed to each other, either. There's no pretending it isn't there, anymore. Crowley said as much. No more hiding. I don't think this doomed their relationship going forward, even if it may take a while to fully smooth things over.)

TL;DR They'd fight like hell for Earth, probably wouldn't be able to succeed without the other, probably die trying anyways and with many regrets regarding each other. Best case scenario God personally intervenes out of the blue and mercifully decides to thwart Heaven's own plan but they both still spend the rest of eternity thinking of what could've been. They'd hate it. They'd miss each other SO BAD and would (fail to) pretend they didn't.

-Pure South Downs fluff would be such tonal whiplash lmao and would also feel kinda unearned? I think fluffier moments shine brightest when the characters have had to work for it a little and Aziraphale/Crowley still have a LOT of problems that need to be sorted in order to be able to be happy together. (Also it's just... not gonna happen. You can't tease the Second Coming and then skip past it to an "everything's fine" future.) The entire point of S3 for me is we KNOW where they'll end up- we want to see HOW. It's not a story without stakes and consequences and a bit of risk, at least when it comes to Good Omens. That isn't to say that they need to be tortured or whatever in S3 to feel earned, but we need to see a lot of things get wrapped up (Second Coming, Aziraphale needs Heaven to leave him alone + needs to be able to work through his complicated feelings regarding it, Crowley needs for Hell to stop calling on him, they need to be able to safely communicate what they want, they need to talk about the kiss, etc). We want to see these!! We can't get these without a bit of hurt. I wanna see them break free more than I want pure fluff. That's just me though.

(With that being said, I hope that at least they get a BIT of time next season to just... be together. Happily. And do some of the things they couldn't before. And by a 'bit of time' I mean 'I sure do hope it's more than like 2 minutes before the credits roll but I will take literally anything I can get at this point'. There's potential here!!! So much of it!!! And they deserve it!!! It's just not the show's tone for it to take up that much time. I'd miss the chaos too much I think, and I'd miss the catharsis of seeing a character finally getting what they want in real time. Just a BIT of fluff at the end though, all I ask. This could insta-kill me.)

TL;DR Bit too much!!! I want them to bicker!!! In a way that's framed comically!!! This is a comedy show!!! And I want to watch them get through hard times!!! I just also want them to make out afterwards and also save the world and stuff. Then I'll be satisfied.

-Honestly I haven't thought much about possible plot twists in S3? I take the Final Fifteen pretty "straightforward" (I don't think the coffee is spiked, I don't think they stopped time, I don't think they body swapped, I don't think the Metatron will be "secretly good", etc) so I don't think there's really enough to go off of at the moment for me when it comes to the plot itself, let alone plot twists for it. I will say though if God is in S3 I will lose my shit; I have a feeling She wouldn't be "caring" but not 100% pure dark evil either if we DO see Her. I don't think She won't be what most fans expect. (Of course, that's just in the hypothetical that She appears. Who knows?)

TL;DR Where is God I'm scared

It took me over an hour to draft this response my bad

[hitsuzenhusbands]

hey! i hope you're having a good day! i just read your (amazing!) asoue fic "ashes to ashes," and i was fascinated by the way you portrayed kit and olaf. i thought i'd send this ask because i'd really love to hear more of your thoughts on their dynamic if you feel like sharing? but if you don't feel like expanding on it, i totally understand! thank you so much for sharing your beautiful work on ao3!

OHH anon you are so kind...i apologize for being so extremely late but i just finished writing a little analysis so i figured now's about the right time to write a semi-legible response. might have been scary and incomprehensible otherwise. but i am finally here to scream and cry and thank you so desperately because im SO happy you enjoyed them AND decided to ask for more info! <3

to begin, i'd be absolutely inconsolable if i didn't point you towards @virginian-wolfsnake's fic the eye of the storm, probably one of my fave k&o fics of all time that delves into the meat of their relationship through the years from the perspective of kit. they're young and still excited by missions and flirty and tender and genuine, and, in time, when the rest of their world collapses, so do they--messy and tense and so wonderfully realistic you have to read it and then read it again. honestly, if you don't want to read the rest of this but still want an answer, just read that. but also read it anyway

and now i have to ask you to forgive me...i have not read the books in a very long time and while i know the netflix series (in comparison) is bad and awful and terrible, i have watched it a million times. so if i'm wrong on anything. that's why.

to begin, the version of olaf i depicted in my fic is at the height of his...how do you say...pathetic misery. not including the spiral he has during the series. to me, the death of his parents are the beginning of his downfall into something-like-insanity, but he's still (and will continue to be) recognizably himself, if that makes sense. he's always been messy and emotional and dramatic (see the line: "...Kit has seen him in worse states and with a much better view..."), but only now does he reveal not a different side of himself per se, but a different angle of one that already existed.

im a fervent believer that olaf's always been a little self destructive and a lot crazy. hes spent the greater half of his life coming to terms with the fact that he is intrinsically not as noble as the rest of vfd--hes impulsive and obnoxious and self-obsessed, barely even literate at times--and it takes a special kind of guy to carve the insignia of the organization full of people he despises into his own front door. still, his parents' death was a catalyst, meaning he wasn't entirely opposed to vfd beforehand. he probably liked the missions and the secrecy and the dramatics, obviously the disguises and everything, but i think before the night at the opera it was really just a source of fun for him. he never truly grasped the reality of it, the nature of his actions and the weight of his involvement. whether that was out of naivety or pure neglect of the facts is up for debate. (there's a little bit of this in the shattering of thalia and melpomene if that interests you at all, beloved anon. see the line: "...[Esme] could never compare to the extent to which [Olaf] removes himself from everyone else entirely. How he spends so much time worrying about himself he almost forgets to worry about himself...Esme could never truly get lost in her own greatness. Could never turn a blind eye to the inner workings of V.F.D.")

kit, on the other hand, definitely did. serving as a volunteer was her purpose, the sole thing she had to cling to. she dedicated her life to it, making conscious decisions to go against her moral code in the hope that it all truly was for a greater good. i think, at times, she could fall into her own little fits of self-destruction, putting vfd above herself entirely (see the line: "This wouldn’t be the first time she’d done something she would never truly volunteer for...he’d still spent year after year watching her run off...to do something she could never speak of." "...she still returned with clenched teeth and knit eyebrows, as though she had no choice in the matter at all.")

to avoid any more convolution, in my mind it goes something like this: both are volunteers--olaf born and raised (along with beatrice), kit torn from her family and thrust into the thick of it so early on its all she knows. they grow up, probably-definitely know each other but dont know each other until, say, late teens-early twenties?

up until then, they've been everything previously described, but intermingling with one another changes this. olaf's easygoing approach rubs off on kit, partly because she finds more joy in his company than in missions, partly because he makes every attempt to keep her from leaving. i like to think she tries to keep his relatively flimsy moral code in check, or at the very least restrain his temper to the best of her abilities.

to me, they're a simultaneously great and terrible couple. at their best, they counteract each other in a positive way as described above and serve as a welcome distraction from the realities of a crumbling vfd, a little island of tenderness and domesticity in the ocean of turmoil that surrounds them.

and at their worst, their personalities combat so violently it's hard to see how they ever could have been together. olaf deals out the worst of it, prone to neglect and self-isolation, a deeply inset refusal to discuss anything with her, an inclination towards firestarting and an increasingly poor reputation with everyone kit knows. then again, kit isn't free of blame (if you can call it that), she's just as opposed to talking anything out as he is, and her isolation takes on the shape of running off to do as many missions as as she can before she's dead on her feet. she's pulled in different directions--a well-instilled hatred towards firestarers, only further influenced by whatever rumours olaf's growing list of enemies supplies her, versus her love for him, her knowledge of who he really is, a concept that is often tested. (see the line: "He’s reminded of a fight they once had, about something or other, that ended in her angry admission that it was easier to be upset with him when he wasn’t nearby.") 

anyway, the idea is they grow further and further apart both ideologically and physically/relationship-wise until the opera night and the crash following that (see: the whole fic!) and from then on i think they fall into something like an evil situationship. they barely see each other, complete opposite sides of the schism. i say situationship because i think when they do see each other (on missions, at events/in public, in private, etc.) it is just a terrible experience no matter what. they're both torn between hating the other for what they know about them/what they did (i like to think olaf finds out about kit supplying the darts) and reminiscing/yearning for what they once had.

for the sake of this i wont give my thoughts on whose baby kit has because that's a whole other thing (not really. its just more of a fun hc i think about on occasion as opposed to something concrete in canon or even my version of canon) but their scene in the end does make me insane. its a culmination of all the time spent wishing what happened didnt happen, almost as though theyre seeing each other for the first time once again, perhaps not blind to the past but looking away for (on olafs part) one final moment of normalcy.

i hope thats what you were looking for to any degree, anon. im a little rusty on my lore but they matter to me soo much. if i have to leave this on anything, its go read eye of the storm. kitlaf fic of all time.

[wolfertinger]

I feel like a lot of the anons here have gotten a lot more harsh lately. I understand people's frustration, I really do. But I really don't want people to use all the genuinely awful stuff Salem has done as an excuse to misgender him or say he deserves the genuinely bad stuff that *did* happen to him. What's the end goal here? All you're doing is feeding his persecution complex.

I know Salem reads this blog, so this next bit is directed to him directly:

Hi Salem. I don't think we've ever interacted directly, but I'm also a transgender furry artist who's suffered with mental health issues. I find myself relating to you a lot, actually. I understand that a lot of the anons on this blog aren't very sympathetic, and I want to give you some real honest advice. No bullshit, no concern-trolling.

While I don't always agree with how they go about it, a lot of the things the other anons are criticizing you for are very valid. I understand it can be hard to take otherwise valid criticism when it's sandwiched between bad-faith criticism, but they're still very real problems. You can't take back all the awful things you've said/done, but there are ways to grow and move on gracefully. I can't promise that everyone will forgive you, but I think there's only so much you can reasonably ask from someone, and that's all I'm asking from you. Shifting blame to alters/delusions or trying to downplay them as "not that bad" isn't helping. You have to own up to your bad decisions. Say you messed up, you're sorry, and it won't happen again. Don't play the victim. I understand that getting a lot of criticism can *feel* like getting attacked, but I promise that's not what I'm trying to do here.

Try making art (or maybe even try out a new hobby) just for yourself and not for followers. See what you really like. Experiment a little. Don't worry about making it perfect or for an audience. Try to find a hobby that you can do offline, like reading or knitting or something.

I was a "NEET" for about a year or so. It was around the time I was in and out of inpatient, so having work/school probably wouldn't have worked out too well for me anyway. I don't know if I have any "advice" per se. I eventually got a job, which I do like and can send a decent bit of my attention on, but I'm still pretty broke. I don't know your specific situation, but if you're able to, it probably won't hurt to get a part-time job somewhere. Even if you can't work, try to give yourself tasks around the house or around the neighborhood. Homekeeping can feel like a full-time job, even if you're not getting paid! Try to keep yourself in a routine, like waking up and eating meals around the same time every day.

If I understand right, you're seeing a therapist now? Make sure they're a good fit for you. If you think you need some kind of specialist, don't be afraid to seek one out. Try to make a goal for therapy seasons and be open to feedback from your therapist. Don't just use them to aimlessly vent. Keeping a journal can also be helpful. I sometimes find it hard to come up with the words during session so writing it down beforehand can help clear things up.

Don't feel the need to change your body for anyone. Go on HRT, don't go on HRT, whatever. Just make sure it's because you actually want to do it, and not because you feel pressured by people on the internet.

I understand that a lot of things are out of your control, but you can still try to take some small steps. I do not take pleasure in seeing you suffer. I wish I could see you learn and grow from this situation. I wish you a safe new year in 2025. Please don't let me down.

.

[the-words-we-sung]

First impressions after watching season 3

So after being super patient all day yesterday, I finally managed to get back home and binge watch season 3 last night \o/ I'm just gonna put a few of my first thoughts here for now, I'm gonna need to rewatch everything to have more detailed and coherent thoughts 😁 But first of all, I wanna thanks Amber 💜 (@amailboxlemur) for being the best spectator and companion to my live reactions 😂 It was super duper nice to be able to share these with you while I was watching and going through all the emotions 😱 So I liked the season!! It was a lot a lot but I really enjoyed it!! It made me cry, it made me laugh, it made me blush... All the rainbow emotions 💜

Here is my reaction at the end of episode 5, and I think it sums up pretty well my feeling at that moment :p

So a few randoms comments (I will write more about each episode after rewatching them, which I intend to start doing tonight because I neeeeeed to watch it all again):

[It's not spoiler-free so don't read if you haven't watched the season yet!!]

⁂ Simon was incredibly sad this season and it broke my heart. Seeing him cry just made me cry. He was so lost and broken, I really can't wait for the last episode to see him get better (yes I'm an eternally optimist person so I believe he will be happier!!)

⁂ I wasn't expecting the Micke/Sara storyline but I think I liked it! It gave us a new perspective into the Eriksson family dynamic and I felt so so bad for Sara at the end

⁂ I loved to see Simon being truly angry at his sister!! Baby boy is so used to being nice and forgiving, so it was really refreshing to see him actually be mad and stand his ground about it!!

⁂ Wilhelm Wilhelm Wilhelm. My poor boy is a mess! He was so hopeful at the beginning, thinking he could finally have it all, but yeah it was obviously not gonna be smooth sailing. He's such a messy, broken, angry teenager this season and my heart cries for him. He ends up hurting Simon quite a lot but I cannot be truly mad at him. He's a broken boy trying his best :(

⁂ Which leads me to his family: arghhhhhh. So I was hoping that we would get some more info to understand Kristina at least a little bit, but she's just truly awful this season. And the Duke is not better. I hate them for how they behave with Wilhelm. And on a more personal note: I always saw my own mother in Kristina, but this season it's even more flagrant, and gosh does it make me mad for Wilhelm. His lashing out at them at the end of episode 5 was as painful as it was good to see. I've been in his situation. I've yelled like him too many times to count. So I hurt for him. He deserves so much better. Nobody should have these kind of people as parents :(

⁂ The Erik stuff made me so sad!!

⁂ The whole school situation was a bit frustrating at time but it was interesting to see the characters reacting to it all. Felice is a queen and deserves so much better than her "friends". And Vincent can rot in hell 😠

⁂ They're all incredible actors!! And the show is beautiful as usual. I am slightly disappointed with the music (no song captured me as well as the ones in season 1 and 2, but maybe I just need to watch the episodes a few times for that to happen ^^)

⁂ All the cute scenes between Wilhelm and Simon were just the best. Seeing them be silly boyfriends was the best. And yeah, the chemistry is still chemistrying hard between Edvin and Omar :p

I'm gonna stop my list of first reactions there, but I'll continue in more details episode by episode! Overall I think I like this season, though the ending killed me and the week to come is gonna be the longest week ever ^^' I am not really worried about the last episode. I trust the show. I do believe Wilmon will be endgame. And I think not everything will be wrapped up neatly but I do think the ending will be satisfying. So can't wait \o/

[crossdressingdeath]

Forgive me, Father, for I cannot help but admire the Chosen of your sworn foe: Enver Gortash's genius will take us far, but fear not - those of Bane always fall to the same folly: they cannot see the beauty of obliteration. The Absolute hoax will garner false love from new slaves, but once I've built a large enough army, I will use our hold upon the Absolute's slaves to begin this vile world's end. I can see the path through Gortash's brilliant plan. Gortash, Ketheric and I will seize the Netherese relics that control the Crown, and then use the Crown to command the illithid Grand Design. The Dead Three, age-old foes, our dire patrons, will be bosom friends for a time. Father, you created me to be the last soul alive. When the time is right, and my power is assured, I will slaughter Gortash and Ketheric upon your altar, where I myself hope to die when the world itself is gasping its last. At the end of this all, Father, there will not be a single creature living. Everyone will die. Everyone will die for YOU. I will make you proud. [Note appended at the bottom of the page in a different hand] Ha! Orin was right about her sibling. - Balth.

First off: so this whole plan is a deal between the Dead Three? I knew Ketheric had ties to Myrkul and the Bhaalists' affiliation is right there in the name, but I didn't realize Gortash served Bane. That's interesting. Also incredibly concerning, I am very worried about whatever's got these three working together, it can't be good for life in Faerûn. Guess that explains why they're important enough to get loading screen text...

Anyway, more importantly! Did Durge write this?! Is this what got them tadpoled, were they planning to betray the other Chosen to end the world and Orin ratted them out? They don't comment on it at all, not even to recognize their handwriting, but given the amnesia and brain damage situation that doesn't necessarily mean anything.

Getting some really strong daddy's kid energy from this, too. Like, they're going to end the damn world and kill everyone alive to make Daddy proud, that's... unhealthy. That's an unhealthy thing to do for parental validation. Don't do that. Although I suppose that does explain why they wanted the Slayer so badly, given it seems to be like. the ultimate expression of Bhaal's favour. Working on the assumption that Durge did write this I can't wait for Bhaal to actually make an appearance, I'm sure it'll be awful in the best way possible. The bit about them being created to be the last soul alive and them fully intending to die on Bhaal's altar at the end is also... a lot. Please can the party return the "let's help our friends escape the conditioning and/or control of the shitty incredibly powerful being who's been fucking up their lives" favour if/when Durge regains their memories, because I'm sure that's going to cause problems. And it seems like Orin did rat them out somehow, which... seems odd, given you'd think this would be her ultimate goal as well. If I had to make a guess I'd say either she's not quite as loyal to their father as Durge is, Durge got a touch overzealous in deciding what their father's will actually was, or this is Orin's goal too and she just wants the glory of being the one to enact it. Or maybe she decided that given Durge wrote this shit down they weren't smart enough. I hope they at least intended to destroy it...

Also: I haven't even met Gortash yet and I think I'm already starting to see why people ship him with Durge. I mean that "Forgive me, Father, for I cannot help but admire the Chosen of your sworn foe" bit? The note itself is called something like Prayer for Forgiveness (I don't remember the exact name and I can't find it on the wiki but I'm certain it talks about forgiveness, if I'd thought of it I'd have made a note of it but I didn't), so the apology is very much the reason why this was written! It has the same energy as apologizing to your parents for falling for the bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks, I feel. And an excellent opportunity for enemies to lovers...

[silver-wield]

hey I don't know if i posted this here or to my friend but uh, i want to talk about what "interrupted by fireworks" mean.

So this ost shows up in three sections of OG. Gsd where it fits with tifa, uematsu confirmed this. In mideel and the Rancid cait sith premonition to aerith.

At first you'd wonder if it's an ost for a "romantic" atmosphere. But is it really? That's what some think. But look, rebirth has deleted that ost why?

Because i think the song isn't meant to be "romantic" at all. It's a sign of distress and worry. Could be in Tifa's pov or Cloud's pov, or maybe both?

In her gsd, tifa has trouble telling what she meant. Cloud has a need to know what she wanted to say. Didn't get there with their conversation.

In mideel, tifa sees cloud dying. Cloud is unable to be with Tifa especially now. Is this the end of them?

In the cait sith bullshit, tifa.. is not gonna be with cloud?(I know she wasn't there but we know the song is representative of tifa and we know she's in love with cloud, is this an indirect rejection? Of course we know it's bullocks but at this moment, we look at it). And to cloud, has the same thing with tifa. If he not meant for tifa? I recall he doesn't say anything here but Nor is he happy because he's not. This Isn't what he wants. Never what he wants.

Rather than romantic, it's like a segway, an insight to distress. Even the title is distressing haha.

But now it's gone? Why? Because unlike OG, there have been little to Zero times where tifa sees a distress within their relationship. Gsd, they confirm eachother. Maybe in part 3 she'll get in a distance from him because that's not the soldier cloud we know. I just hope whatever it is that they don't feed crackshippers anymore bullshit to feed their Delusions. I know tifa worries in an ultimania about his bond to aerith. Needless detail and out of context (because she's just being paranoid, questioning everything, until she sees he's just there to ask for forgiveness and is dying. Things she didn't know prior but I wish she could have trusted him better. Again Useless detail, Never in the film Nor novels). But we sure as heck the ones who heard him call her Nakama and Mother 😂. Tifa dear Wake up.

Anyway. That's all. Still can't believe some think the caith sith thing in OG is "romantic" like seriously? After knowing she dies and it's a lie? They think it's not that and it's just "tragic what could been"? They clearly don't understand how premonitions work right? If it didn't happen, then it will never happen. Exactly as tifa's premonition was awful but look at them they're together smiling. Then AC ruins that and made Delusional people think cait sith is "correct" (nvm how Shit he is at this like yo gurl DIED). because they didn't make it clear that he's been Super Happy after the events of FF7. But seriously, these people have difficulty letting go of their preconceived Delusional HC. Goddamn shippers🤦.

Uhhh actually Nobuo explained a lot of times they reused or even used tracks in og for segments of the game the track wasn't intended for. Like he was surprised aerith's theme played at the forgotten city because he only wrote it for the flashback at the train station to show the similarity between her and Elmyra both waiting for a loved one.

Also there was a lotta hands in the pot for og, most notably toriyama, who liked to fuck things up behind Nojima's back. His involvement was heavy handed af for disc one until aerith died, when he took a back seat. He was and still is salty af his fave isn't the love interest.

The temple bullshit was his idea, which is why it doesn't exist in rebirth. The canon relationship is the work of nomura and nojima and the people who weren't out to ruin their own work.

[keeganmantle]

Well, it's been 2 months since that situation, and everything is back to normal, but you might be wondering how I'm feeling right now. Well, at least Tumblr is fine now. I feel fine, but of course I'm never gonna get over what that guy did. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, 2 months ago I got in some beef with this guy. I'm not saying his name since I moved on, but I'll say that I did not start it. I don't know what his deal was. He liked my stuff, said my art was good. He asked about an art trade once which I said no. What did I do to deserve this? Was he mad I turned down an art trade? Was he jealous of my work? I'll never know, and I don't care. Because as time passed, one day I'm just on my computer and I get mentioned in a post where he just keeps going off about me. When he doesn't know me at all! Talked smack about me. What was he so mad about?! Why was I a target?! I did nothing to this man. And I don't care about him at all because he's crazy. Here's why. So I just called him out and blocked him. Nothing too crazy. But then the next morning, I wake up, check my Tumblr, and I get this DM from him. He was using different accounts to harass me. He sent me very disgusting and disturbing art of him killing me. Then said he knew where I lived, knew my parents. Like, how? What a freaking maniac! I should mention he's from China and knowing what they're capable of it should be no surprise.😐

I still don't understand what he's so mad about. He kept saying awful things like he was gonna find me, do horrible things to me, all because I blocked him. If you get so butthurt about someone blocking you that you decide to threaten them, you need some serious help. I have all the evidence of what he did. I took screenshots. They're all over the internet. He was mad at me because he's crazy that's my guess. Because I like to post about my comfort characters so what? They helped me through a lot. I came to Tumblr to expand my social media content and also because Twitter keeps crapping itself. And now thanks to that guy, I kinda have trust issues on here. I'm trying to be careful interacting with people. I just don't want this to happen again. And he made me really scared of DMs. When I was on Facebook 3-4 years ago, I was 17 at the time, a bunch of middle-aged perverted women kept DMing me. It really scarred me. That was the start of me having comfort characters. I just wanna stay away from awful women. Is that so wrong? Also, since I'm in a distant relationship with my girlfriend, comfort characters help me through being lovesick.😊

But yeah, that man has traumatized me. C'mon, he said he knew where I lived, said he was gonna find me and kill me and my family! He's a psychopath! I hope he's doing his own thing now. He should've got off the internet because he came back claiming he's the victim. It makes me laugh. I know I have nothing to worry about as you guys know the truth and I know crazy people usually try to gaslight the whole situation.😁

He said I made up the whole thing. How in the world could I make this up?! He also said I made those drawings. Dude, I don't draw like that! Why would I waste my time trying to make him look bad and make those drawings myself? Why would I do that to myself?! I was just documenting what he was doing. He ruined his own life. I'm not going to apologize. I'm not gonna forgive him. Why should I? He doesn't know what I've been through. And he just cause even more anxiety. Now you see why I need my comfort characters? Because people like him exist. Also I was having suspicions about him. This thing of him threatening me in the Tumblr DMs went on for a few days. He also said to have s*xual fantasies about me. And what he did that made me lose it and end his whole career was something that would make your blood boil too. He sent me something very awful. It was an art of him violating my girlfriend! The love of my life! Then said very perverted things about her and my mom. Now see why I think he's a pervert? A predator? More importantly a r*pist?! He might as well be! You don't do that to people. Words can hurt. Actions can hurt. It all hurts.😥

I love my girlfriend so much. We met nearly 2 years ago. She was a fan of mine. Then we became good friends and then eventually started dating.😊

The whole situation of what that guy did made me feel insecure, but I know that she loves me. She told me so. Our bond is strong. I know she's fine. I feel like we were meant to be. I feel like I found the woman I wanna spend the rest of my life with. What that guy did made me really worried about her. I know it was just an art but it felt real. I get very sensitive when it comes to violence towards women. It really makes my blood boil!😡

I still cry a bit from that art. I don't want her to get hurt. Anything about women getting hurt makes me cry a bit. I don't know why, I just don't wanna see that stuff. Especially if it's my girlfriend! Whenever something like Lifetime is on TV and they're playing a movie about a girl getting abused or something I sometimes have to either try to lock my eyes to my screen if I'm on my phone or playing a game, or sometimes just walk out of the room. I'm sorry, I just can't do it. I can't handle it. Just goes to show how much I care about women at least.😁

Really, he knows nothing. He traumatized me. What he did made me wanna let out some stuff I've been holding back or at least wanted to tell you but Twitter limits so much. I can have comfort characters. These female characters helped me remember there are good women in the world. As I still deal with some disgusting cougar moms mostly p*rn bots!😐

Even on here. I got weird DMs of women saying they're h*rny and wanted to chat in a sussy link. Just give me a break! I'm not that kind of man! Anyway, thank you all so much for the love and support. It was a really embarrassing yet traumatizing situation. You don't do that to people! If you hate something, just ignore it! That's what I do. Let's make this year even better. Let's try not to let any mishaps happen. Screw the haters. Lowlifes suck! Love you guys. Thank you.❤️

[sometimesrosy]

The 100 Rewatch 2023 Liveblog 1.08

Day Trip

Oh boy! The memories. This is the beginning of Bellarke for me.

We are going to post like men here. No editing. Forgive my typos. I touch type as i go and i may be fast but i'm not that accurate. I will remember to do a read more this time though. Because this is long.

We open with beefcake Lincoln strung up for torture. Honestly. That's rude. It's not sexy just because he's hot.

Miller told the dead kids parents the news that their kids were murdered by grounders. He wants "justice." and Bellamy says they're not killing him. Miller is an ass and puts mud on lLincoln and Lincoln headbutts him. LOL.

Talking to the Ark they want Clarke to find an emergency shelter for supplies. Diana Sydney is like nah. We're about to come down, the baby kids should stay put. Now Jaha is trying to get Clarke back with her mom but she blames him for betraying her dad, too.

Oh Dax is going to talk to "his parents" and it's Shumway to proposition him into murder. Just like he did Bellamy. But this time he wants B dead. Dax already beat a man to death. He's one of the murderers they talked about.

Now B and O are arguing about Lincoln. B is calling him an animal. Knock that off, kid.

Clarke wants to take Bellamy for the supply run at the depot. And he's suspicious. "I don't feel like being around anyone I actually like." Which he gets because hello Octavia.

Jasper and MOnty with grim humor. Don't worry about the grounder revenge. Byt the time they get here we'll be dead of hypothermia.

Ugh Clarke and Finn being all "I'll take care of you." ANd Raven is right there. "She's a big girl she can take care of herself." Then in comes Bellamy. ooh Finn is jealous. Bellamy is taking all the rations and Clarke is suspicious. "A lot can happen in a day." Foreshadowing. Sneaky Dax follows them out of the camp.

Miller goes to talk to Roma's parents and O sneaks up to Lincoln. She gives him water. Neat little canteen made out of what? Parachute? more beefcake as she cleans up his washboard abs and he is like smelling her or whatever. Y'all I don't like kidnapping/torture as a start to a romance. But this is better than most because he originally kidnapped her to keep her safe and she's trying to stop the torture.

He tells her his name because he wants her to remember him after he dies. "This only ends one way." Because he IS the enemy.

Clarke and Bellamy in the woods. I remember this. Bellarke in the wild. Bellamy is really feeling guilt and fear over the Jaha attempted murder.

Raven and Octabia in Camp. O is a mess. WOW they are catty to each other. O says "It must suck to come down here and find out your boyfriend is into someone else." OUCH. True but OUCH. Why is she so mean when she grew up with only two supportive people? Yes she should be messed up but should she be a meangirl?

Raven wants to do Finn and Finn wants to talk. "Something happened." She knows and she doesn't want to talk about it ever. She asks if he loves her "Always." I am puking. Stop kissing him. He's awful. Ew. She has the worst taste in men i swear. She NEVER got a good romantic partner. (Princess Mechanic)

Clarke finds a door Bellamy smacks it with his axe. Down they go into the bowels. Mummified bodies. The place is disgusting. No supplies. Boo. Ooh some orange blankets. Bellamy is mad there's no canteen or medkit or decent fricking tent.

A barrel full of oil. Bellamy temper boy kicks it over and VIOLA OMG GUNS. HUGE BELLAMY SMILE

Monty is tripping. Fermented nuts?Or hallucinogenic. Now Jasper is tripping but it's not as nice as Monty's trip. He sees grounders everywhere. Scary. He runs to O for help. She figures out that he's on something. HE tells her he loves her. She figures it's the nuts. She gives him an anti-grounder stick so the grounders won't be able to see him. "Makes sense."

We could have used more of that O in the bunker in season 5.

She gives Miller the hallucinogenic nuts. Lincoln knows.

:Ready to be a bad ass Clarke?" She doesn't want the guns but she knows they need them. SO he offers her shooting lessons.

Oooh. He reaches around her and touches her shoulder, his voice gets smoky and steps back from her. I forgot about the sexiness of that. Watch and learn. He tries to shoot and his bullets are duds.

"Still watching." smirky flirting. She shoots and BOOM. She likes it. B likes it htat she likes it. She's being responsible. "You left miller in charge of the grounders. You must trust him." He wants her to keep him close and she's like. OMG you're gonna run. He thinks the Ark are gonna kill him when they come down. O hates him, so he's leaving.

Tells her to keep practicing. He needs some air. THat was a SHORT scene. To base our Bellarke fantasies on for seven years.

Now he's tripping Jaha. Nightmare land coming up. "I did what I had to do." But Jaha calls him out for all his sins. Now he sees the 320 culling victims. Bellamy can't defend himself against that. All his guilt. He really feels it. Oooh. Sooky. All the dead people calling him murder and coming through the wilderness at him.

Now Clarke is tripping. She's back her jail cell in the Ark. See her dad.

Everyone in the deinguent camp is tripping and one kid is stripping so O takes his clothes.

Raven and Finn are naked in bed. M0nty pops in."I can't change the tide if the moon won't cooperate. It's basic physics."

Clarke realizes her dad vision is not real. The dad vision wants her to forgive her mom. Poor baby clarke is so young here. Everyone's counting on her and it's so hard. She's feeling guilt about torturing Lincoln. Dad says she did the best she could. This is the beginning of Clarke learning about forgiveness and why she could forgive Bellamy and Lxa and all those people.

NOW dad vision calls her a crazy bitch and turns into Dax.

O frees Lincoln. Gives him delinquent clothes.He thinks this will put her in danger. That's because he's a grounder and they are barbarians and would kill someone for doing what she's doing. Jobi nuts go bad and cause vision. So he can sneak out.

He kisses O.

Yo. You should really find a girl your own age man. She's what? 16? 17 at most.

Most beautiful broom in a broom closet of brooms. Raven taking care of the kids. Even Finn is taking care of the kids until he sees Lincoln escaping. He's like get on outta here. Which is, I have to give Finn his due, the best thing he does in a while. He forgives Lincolnd for stabbing him.

Bellamy bad tripping on his 'murder victims' He wants them to kill him. Jaha beats him up. "I can't fight any more." "don't you know? LIfe is a fight." "What am I supposed to do?""Live breathe suffer. if you want the peace of death you're going to have to earn it. You think you dserve to be free of your pain? You think you deserve that gift?"

But actually, the Jaha beating him up is Dax. "You shoulda stayed down there clarke I tried not to kill you. But Shumaway said no witnesses."

Walk away now and I won't kill you. You're choice. His gun misfires as he aims at clarke and Bellamy charges him. Fight. Dax has him on the ground. Clarke charges Dax and he slams her in the gut with the butt. B picks up a bullet and slams it into Dax's jugular. Not coincidentally the place where Clarke stabbed Atom to mercy kill him. A nice little callback.

Dax is gone, B and C are up against the tree. "Are you okay?" Clarke asks?

No I'm not. If my mother she knew what I'd done, who I am? She raised me to be better to be good and all I do is hurt people. I'm a monster."

"Hey you saved my life today. And you may be a total ass half the time, but... I need you."

The look on his face as he looks at her.

"We all need you. None of us would have survived if it weren't for you.

He looks away.

She tells him to come back with him. You have to face it. He says "Like you faced your mom."

You're right. I don't want to face my mom. I don't want to face any of it." She is obsessed with keeping everyone alie.

Why is the music so romantic right now?

Can we figure it out later?

Whenever you're ready.

Bullshit you didn't write this as romantic.

O is pretending that she got high too. She did not. Good cover. Miller says the grounder is gone. Jasper panics.

Bellamy is back. "LEt the grounders come" He's tired of being afraid. Looks at Clarke and they both drop the guns. Finn looks unhappy.

Team Bellarke. Leaders. Friends. Soulmates.

The story has just changed.

O is looking out into the woods. B comes up and gives her an oragne blanket. She takes it. "I don't expec tyou to forgive me but you'll have to find a way to live with me because I'm not going anywhere.

Clarke calls him in to speak to Jaha. B knows O helped the grounder escape. She says it wasnt her and thanks him for the blanket.

Jaha.

CLarke. When you sent us down here, you sent us to die, but miraculaously most of us are still alive and in large part that is because of bellamy." She wants him pardoned like the rest of them.

Bellamy doesn't depend on his better nature. He says "If you wnat to know who wants you dead." Jaha pardons him and asks for who gave him the gun.

Cut to Shumway being arrested. Kane is angry. Shumway thinks he's fighting for what he believes but won't say what that is.

Clarke checks Finn's wound and Finn tries to guilt her about the guns. And he tries to say that Bellamy is the real danger. Clarke TRUSTS him. Finn is horrified. That's because he knows B is his rival. "You and Bellamy are leading us down a dangerous road. I wish you'd talked to me about it first." WHEN was finn the leader? Fucking asswipe. She is like "I wish we talked about a lot of things."

Diana Sydney comes to Shumway and Diana has him killed.

I honestly do sympathize with Diana Sydney's position but she's such a horrible character (dare I say horrible actress I hate her D:) and her plans are so horrible that she, who should have been the good guy, becomes the bad guy. I'm usually for the proletariat, but Diana was vicious and stupid and mean and her plans were bad and unethical and selfish.

[riverstardis]

series 32 episode 37:

alicia :(

oh isn't that the actress who played young yaz's grandma in doctor who?

lmaooo bea and rash trying to use the coffee machine i miss them sjdjsfjfd

leigh-anne🙄 apparently they're taking kiegan off the oxygen today and ethan said he'd be there but the eds really busy because there's been a coach crash so he says he's sure she'll be fine without him and mr barling knows what he's doing but she insists

alicia volunteering to go out to the crash to get away from eddie :(

connie's mad that she went without permission and ethan says he and bea will help with the backlog but then immediately leaves bea when he gets a text from leigh-anne. what are you doing man😭😭

oh no leigh-anne runs over to ethan and hugs him when he gets to paeds and he's uncomfortable and mr barling's starting at them😭😭😭 then when jonathan's gone she says they shouldn't have to skulk around in the shadows and she wants to tell people now that kiegan's no longer a patient... which is an interesting thing to say when they're standing next to his hospital bed... ethan says they need to be careful and he just seems annoyed tbh i think forgiving alicia snapped him out of whatever he thought he felt for leigh-anne lmao

oop ethan goes to speak to mr barling, presumably to try and convince him there was nothing inappropriate going on but it's too late lmao mr barling has clearly already figured it out and warns him that there are boundaries they don't cross and ethan's like "yeah, i admit, she has come to rely on my support more than i would've liked" which i think is probably true tbh, though obviously missing out a HUGE chunk of the whole story, bc she has become weirdly distrustful of every other doctor and will only trust him, and yeah he got way too involved with helping her with kiegan to appease his guilt about scott, but he never tried to isolate her or anything so i do believe he didn't want her to end up like this. mr barling's just like "i've seen too many careers cut short because of a doctor who has confused the personal and the professional. i hope you aren't about to add to that number." so true make him see sense. go onnn ethan break up with her i know you want to!

wall collapses on the coach with alicia, iain, sam, and their patient still inside :/

leigh-anne's sitting in reception waiting for ethan??? girl go home what is wrong with you??? he is not happy to see her and tells her that barling knows and she says she doesn't care "tell them all" and he says it's not that simple and he's broken rules doing this and she says he's done nothing wrong and tries to take his hand and he pulls away and eventually manages to convince her to go home. mmmkay now how long til she's back again

lmaoo david tells ethan his patient from the crash's "girlfriend was trapped inside, and by all accounts so was dr munroe" and ethan turns his head SO FAST SJJSDJFSJ soo you see why he's lost patience for leigh-anne😭😭😭

aww he looks so worried🥺

oh look who it is! she managed to leave for one whole scene. kiegan's lips are blue or something and elle rushes him through meanwhile leigh-anne's trying to get her to get ethan

sjsjdf jacob answers the phone and ethan rushes over and jacob tells him that their lot are fine and they're on their way with the patient and ethan says to keep him posted because "the boyfriend's out of his mind with worry" mhmm yep he wasn't the only one though was he?

iain's worried about how cold alicia looks but she says she's fine :/

elle literally got mr barling down to look at kiegan and he says he's breathing fine it's just cold outside but leigh-anne isn't happy she's demanding a second opinion from ethan. i'm sure elle's wondering why she would trust an adult doctor over a paeds doctor with considerably more years of experience

sam finds blake using her punch bag in the ambulance station and says he might as well do it right and demonstrates and he's staring at her in awe. yeah you and me both buddy

aww alicia collapses in resus and they ofc assume she's hypothermic because she's soaking wet and ethan leaves bea to observe dylan doing the procedure and takes alicia to resus 2 to warm her up and she's saying she's so sorry and he's like don't be silly🥺

awww bea comes to check up on alicia🥺🥺🥺🥺 hey listen, alicia has two hands🏳‍🌈 bea says she got soaked out there so no wonder she's hypothermic but ethan says her temperature's actually fine so alicia attributes her collapse to the day taking it out of her :(

alicia comments on how good bea is after she's gone and ethan says she's a fast learner and alicia asks if they can swap mentees for a bit and then she's like "we are friends aren't we?" and he's like "yeah? yeah, i hope so" and she's definitely about to tell him what happened with eddie but elle interrupts them to tell ethan about leigh-anne urghhh ffs

"ethan, you have an admirer! leigh-anne carr is demanded your professional attention for her baby and she won't settle for anything less" "leigh-anne's baby kiegan was discharged?" "well he's back. she said he wasn't breathing but his test results show that he passed with flying colours"😭

ethan reassures leigh-anne that mr barling is a brilliant paediatrician and she goes "yeah. he thinks a lot of himself." huh????

yesss finally he breaks up with her! "i made a mistake, and i'm so sorry, but that's what i do. i just make things worse." oh :((((( ethan PLEASE go to therapy

alicia was waiting for ethan but she gets a call from eddie and he leaves a voicemail saying he's going to come and find her at the end of shift so she leaves early :(

then ethan's looking for her and bea says she's gone home and he says he's worried about her getting home safely because she was so shaken up earlier and eddie offers to go and check up on her and ethan's confused why he would and says it's okay he can do it and rash is smiling at eddie and bea is also confused and asks rash if he's withholding gossip from her😭😭

aw alicia :(

oh shit that made actually made me jump too wtf😭 she looks in the mirror and sees eddie behind her (he's not actually there)

ethan's brought her a bottle of wine and says he was worried about her and they never finished their conversation and then says that he lied earlier about them being friends. WHY WOULD YOU PHRASE IT THAT WAY😭😭😭 she's upset and he clarifies that he means he doesn't think they can be friends because he's still in love with her🥺 yeah wbk bestie but you have TERRIBLE timing AGAIN😭 if he'd told her that literally 24 hours earlier they would've got back together and then eddie never would've had the chance to get anywhere near her :(

her reaction clearly isn't what he hoped for so he apologises for dropping that on her like that and goes to leave but she grabs his arm and says she has to tell him something but she needs a glass of wine first. noooo alicia JUST TELL HIM WHILE YOUVE GOT THE CHANCE

he goes to the kitchen to get glasses and sees a note eddie left on the fridge and assumes that was what she wanted to tell him and he's like "i'm so stupid. he offered to come round, i practically elbowed him out of the way." "ethan this is not what you think" "that's why you wanted to work with bea?" "no! well, yes, but not because i..." "i'm gonna go" "no, please don't!" "i'm such an idiot. i shouldn't have come." she's crying and begging him to stay but she can't say what she means properly so he just says it's fine and he'll see her tomorrow and leaves :((((

alicia burning her bedding😢😢😢😢😢