#which is usually more tolerable than extreme jealousy

[match-your-steps]

if you're gonna have a weird unnecessary harem situation at least have some variety in there. like it can't all be jealous girls put some jealous guys in there too

[roachspeaks]

Slashers and Jealousy

Just drabbles for how the slashers deal with Jealousy :)

REQUESTS OPEN BTW

Warnings: some sexual themes/descriptions, maybe swearing, descriptions of killing people, people with bad intentions, Slight smut in Bo’s and Brahms’s, swearing, sexuality coded(mentions of female friends), side character OC’s (That may be included in One shots in the future),

Michael Myers(I wasn’t sure which version this suited best so you can decide)

It’s a commonly known fact that Michael doesn’t feel things. At least not like other people. He has his own set of emotions and expressions that are completely unique to him. He can be hard to understand sometimes but the closest thing to jealousy is when he sees you giving others the attentiveness you give him. It’s not like he cares. He doesn’t, not like how you care for him. He certainly doesn’t care that your showing a complete stranger the types of care you show him.(patching up their scratches and bruises, giving them a cold drink for the Haddonfield heat). The stranger had apparently claimed that he was passing through town and had gotten into an accident on one of the hiking trails. Michael knew that was a lie. The timing didn’t match up. Michael went on the trails every morning and he didn’t see the stranger or even a wreckage of any kind. Another thing the man left out. Michael didn’t miss how the man held on to your wrist whilst you cleaned his scratches with an alcohol pad. You brushed it off, focusing on the task at hand. You had had enough practice fixing up injuries from Michael. Of course he wasn’t in the room with you two, he was watching from the window outside. Michael could read people easily. He was amazing at it actually. And watching the stranger inside your home he could only read bad intentions. Michael didn’t know how the conversation went but he assumed you offered the stranger the night in your guest room. Michael entered the house silently through the back door. Then silently up the stairs of your home, he wasn’t surprised to see the stranger standing in your doorway while you slept. Michael didn’t hesitate for a moment to come up behind him and slit his throat. Blood spurting all over your floor as he gasped for breath that he didn’t deserve. You had gotten used to waking up when Michael would get home. So you immediately woke to the sounds of dying a just few feet from you. Let’s just say the both of you slept in the guest room that night. He didn’t ‘cuddle’ you per say. He would never, he’s a stone cold serial killer. But he did let you cuddle into him. Because you needed it of course. Not because he was worried about you. But he held you just a little closer than night. Let your hands wander just a little more than he would usually tolerate.

Vincent Sinclair

Let’s be honest. He’s an extremely insecure person, that fuels his jealous thoughts. Often he will be jealous of his brother. You and Bo spend almost as much time together as you and Vincent. You lived with them and Lester. Vincent didn’t get jealous of Lester though, or even strangers. He just knew that Bo was seen as a very attractive individual. That’s how most of the female tourists ended up sculptures in the museum. He handles his Jealousy with sadness and self resent rather than anger or aggression. He feels incompetent with himself and unworthy of the attention you give him. This particular time you and Bo had been working on a truck in the garage. You were both sweaty and covered in oil, in tank tops and sweatpants. The truck was on the lift and had been raised too a level that even Bo couldn’t reach the top. He had accidentally left a wrench on the hood. It wasn’t a big deal. But when Vincent saw Bo holding you up by your waist, his hands happening to be underneath your white tank top. He was heartbroken. Somewhere in his mind he knew that logically you were his partner and you wouldn’t ever leave him for Bo, but in the moment it was easy to forget. Vincent left abruptly, and you noticed. As soon as you were on the ground Bo’s hands returned to his sides. He knew what Vincent was thinking, and you did too. He nodded toward the door Vincent had left though and you swiftly went to follow the long haired man. When you found him he was in his workshop. Scribbling on a piece of paper. You slowly leaned over his shoulder and what you saw shocked you. A drawing of you and him, scribbled out and ripping. Vincent’s breath was jagged and frustrated. “Oh Vince” you whispered into his neck, as your arms came to wrap around him. He froze as if being caught. “I love you. Not Bo. You, Vincent Sinclair” that sentence, plus a lot more physical contact the next day reassured him immensely. He still struggles with insecurity, but you always know how to make it better.

Bo Sinclair

Unlike his twin, Bo’s jealousy is angry and possessive. He’s used to being left behind, he doesn’t want that scenario to happen with you. Let’s be honest Bo is the type to jealous fuck. Aggressively slamming into you over and over. Making you cum over and over again. Reminding you that only he can make you feel that good. Bo uses sex as a coping mechanism. Something he knows he’s the best at so he can hide behind it. It gives him a sense of security. Now though you wouldn’t let that slide. Your legs were already wrapped around his waist as he lathered your jaw in sloppy kisses. Pushing your back up against the wall of the storage closet in the auto shop. A customer was getting just a little too bold with their eyes and Bo hated it. He said he needed to talk to you ‘in the back’. There wasn’t a ‘back’ in the shop. There was a tiny storage closet around the corner, and that’s where he took you. The customer could definitely hear the two of you. You weren’t loud often but Bo just got a rise out of you. His kisses moved down to your neck and collar bone. He growled and moaned against your skin, sending harsh vibrations up your spine. You nearly got lost in the moment, he felt so good against you. But then you remembered that you had been thinking about this for a while. The fact that whenever a customer would interact with you in a way that could seem flirtatious in the shop, it would almost always lead to spontaneous sex with Bo. At first you thought it was a kinky thing but over the course of a while, after taking the time to examine him in these moments. You discovered it wasn’t a kink or turn on, it was a coping mechanism. He always got so fixated and rough in the moment. You didn’t mind the roughness, if anything it was a preference for you, but when he did this it was like he was tranced. Like he had something to prove to you. You swore that the next time he did this that you would confront him on it. Knowing Bo if you asked any other time he would deny that it ever happened. You moved your hands from his neck to his shoulders, pushing him off of you and unwrapping your legs from his torso. He was too caught up, taking this is a change of positions. He continued smashing his lips into yours, practically shoving his tongue with down your throat. “Bo! Mmm… stop it!” He kissed you hard and sloppy between your words. But at the word stop he slowly stepped back, still holding your waist with both hands. “What?” His face was neutral with a pinch of concern. Jealousy still ever present behind his eyes. “What’s up with you? Every time a customer gets a little flirty you freak and drag me back to the storage closet” my fingertips trace the bone of his jawline and move to cup his face in your hands. “I don’t know what what you mean sugar” he smirks and rolls his eyes. You don’t play along though. Instead staring into his eyes with an eyebrow raised. He tries to say that it’s seriously nothing but eventually he cracks. “I don’t-…I don’t like watching people eye you up right in front of me…” he avoids your eyes as if he has anything to be ashamed about. “Bo…it’s ok to get jealous. I get jealous all the time. But we can’t just fuck it out whenever, we still have customers.” I run my thumb along his bottom lip in an attempt to make it more intimate. Being as that is when Bo learns the best. He pays the most attention to you when your being physical. He nods and rests his head on your shoulder. The fabric of his blue coveralls brushing across your arms(that were exposed as you were in a tank top, because you were supposed to be doing car mechanics). You thought that was that but suddenly you heard him chuckling. “You get jealous all the time eh?”.

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas’s jealousy(much like Vincent’s) stems a lot from insecurity, being told all his life by people like Hoyt that he was ugly and that no one could ever really love him. But alternatively when he gets jealous he hates the fact he’s feeling that way at all. He treats it like he’s disrespecting your trust in him by resenting someone else for getting your attention. Most of the time you stay at the house with Luda Mae and there isn’t many occasions where Tommy would get Jealous, however this time you, him, Luda and strangely enough Hoyt, were going grocery shopping in town. He was already getting strange looks from everyone in the store from his appearance. Normally he wouldn’t even have come along, but Luda was getting older and needed more help carrying things. No one knew why Hoyt had come along. He wasn’t going to help, if anything he made it more of a chore than it had to be. Luda had sent you to go grab a bag of sugar, causing you to need to separate from the group. Thomas watched you walk away, worrying. To which he had every right to worry. You couldn’t find the sugar. You had been to this grocery store what felt like hundreds of times and yet you couldn’t find it. You saw a person who worked there though and proceeded to innocently ask him where to find the sugar. He lead you to the shelf. The bags that Luda wanted were big, and heavy. The man took the liberty of offering you help(he clearly wasn’t aware that you could carry it yourself. You lived on a farm for gods sake). You just let him carry the bag. He followed you back to your group, cracking a few jokes that warranted laughs out of you. You clearly didn’t pick up that he was flirting. Hoyt smirked at this, noticing an opportunity to torment Tommy. He elbowed him lightly and laughed smugly. When you got within 10 feet of Tommy you picked up your pace and ran up to him. The worker seemed shocked that these were your people. An old fashioned looking woman, a sheriff carrying a gun obviously on his belt, and Thomas. To strangers Thomas was hard to describe. He was obviously a big man, and the mask situation wasn’t helpful for new interactions either. “Oh right. Thank you!” You smiled brightly at the worker, who’s expression was wary and still surprised. You went to grab the large bag from him and hauled it into the cart. As the four of you went to walk away he called out after you again. “Um here! My phone number.” He slid a small piece of folded paper into your hand before running off. You looked at your hand oddly, that was weird. You didn’t miss how as you walked alongside him, Thomas’s eyes lingered on your hand that slid into your pocket. He was distracted as he walked, bumping into Luda once or twice. Luda being Luda, done with getting her heels stepped on by a man that towered over her, decided to solve the problem. “Tommy, why don’t you and them go get me some butter.” She pointed down the aisle where the butter was. As you followed Thomas you turned your head to see Luda looking at you with a look that said ‘talk to him about it’. So that’s what you did. He had his hands placed on the plastic boarder between the walkway and the shelf. Sometimes you forgot just how big his hands were. You slid one hand overtop of his and intertwined your fingers. “Im not keeping his phone number Tommy.” To prove your point you used your free hand to pull the paper out of your pocket and with help from your teeth you shredded it in half. Both dropping one piece and spitting the other one on the floor of the grocery store. You looked at him from the side of your eye and saw him smiling through the hole in his mask. You grabbed a stick of butter and ran back to Luda and Hoyt, Tommy’s hand still in yours. Hoyt almost said something but before he could he got the back of Luda’s hand to the back of his head.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms is a tough one. Again not many situations when he would get ‘jealous’ per say. Possessive and protective as fuck? Definitely. The idea of you leaving the house scares him, and yet when grocery boy comes around he gets moody. It’s a lose lose situation. You know better than to let Malcom in the mansion, Brahms would lose his shit. But he is the only other companionship you have other than Brahms and your family over a phone. Some days in the mornings you’ll sit on the porch and have a conversation with him over coffee. This has led to many temper tantrums from Brahms. But you always make it up to him. He’s not mature, like at all. We all collectively know that. He’s an eight year old in a 40 year olds body with the horniness of a virgin teenager. You swear he likes to fight you on everything after Malcom’s been around the house. This time he wanted to fight you on bedtime. He had already avoided you all day, only interacting with you to eat. He was touch deprived(more than usual). So, when you went in for his bedtime kiss, even the slight touch made his resolve crumble. His hands grasped your hips roughly, pulling you to straddle him. “Oh, now you wanna talk to me?” Your hands were resting on his chest as to keep yourself upright. “Im not complaining, but your a jealous guy yknow that.” It wasn’t really a question, more of a statement. An incredible accurate one at that. You could see he wanted something, the look in his eyes told you everything. Beautiful forest green eyes clouded with want. “All you gotta do is ask Brahmsy” you lean in to his face, not quite touching him. Just to tease him a little. “Please…” he rasped. His actual voice evident and gruff. “Kiss me…” he leans in just a little leaving barely an inch between you. You could feel his breath on your face, thankful that he had been brushing his teeth. You couldn’t help smashing your lips into his. It was aggressive and needy. He clearly missed you even though it had only been a day, and quite frankly he had probably been watching you through the walls all day. His hands groped at your sides and your chest. All whilst you continued to kiss him. Needy and clingy, two key words when describing Brahms. That night he cuddled into you extra tight. With no intention of letting you up the next morning.

Billy Loomis

Billy doesn’t get jealous unless he’s already having a shitty day. He’s pretty calm and collected. When he does get jealous he starts fights, with everybody. You, Stu, random strangers, teachers, everybody. He’s pretty unstable as is in the terms of emotions. Especially in relationships. His mom made it real hard to trust that someone won’t leave him. In this instance he was jealous of your friend Connor. Connor was generally nerdy, spent all his time in the science labs at school. That’s how you met him actually, a science project. He was the exact opposite of Billy. Frankly you were more of a ‘smart nerdy’ type yourself. It was ridiculous how it all started anyways, you had a study session already planned with Connor. You made sure to tell Billy that a week in advance, knowing he doesn’t like surprises. But apparently he forgot all about it and made plans with Stu and his new temporary girlfriend. Obviously you told him you couldn’t go because you already had plans that you told him about. He got frustrated and jealous as expected. Connor showed up at your house at the worst moment then possible. If we’re gonna be honest Connor never liked Billy much either. Billy was extremely popular and kind of an asshole to the smarter kids at school. Not to say he wasn’t smart, he’s just quiet and friends with Stu so people assume his grades aren’t great. You and Billy had been yelling at each other when Connor opened your door. What happened next was all a blur, memorable events include Connor and Billy getting into each other faces, Connor pushing Billy, and Billy knocking Connor on his ass with a punch to his jaw, Billy had a reputation of overdoing it. Evident in this situation because Billy proceeded to get on top of Connor and continue to punch him. By the time he stopped Connors whole face was bleeding and bruised and Stu and his girlfriend had come into the house. The only reason he stopped was because Stu pulled him off. Sure they killed people but not as Billy and Stu, so he wrapped his arms around him and dragged him off of Connor. You had to call him an ambulance but you knew about Ghost face. “Both of you go. I’ll call an ambulance.” Stu understood why you wanted them gone, so he left. Dragging Billy out behind him. The next few days were lonely. Billy didn’t come back to your house, you assumed he was staying at Stu’s. But around a week after the incident you received an anonymous call. When you picked up you heard the voice of Ghost face over the line. “What’s your favourite scary movie?” If Billy planned on killing you it was a little too late, so you played along. You told him your favourite. The voice over the phone laughed and said something along the lines of ‘So I do know a thing or two, huh?’ The voice then told you to go outside into your backyard. You did as it instructed and stepped out of your back door to see a large sheet draped on the wall of your house, with a projection on it of the title screen of your favourite horror movie. In the centre of it all stood ghost face. Your ghost face. You walked up to him and once in touching vicinity you flipped the chin of his mask up over his mouth and kissed him. No matter how irrational and irresponsible he was sometimes, you missed him. When you pulled away he fully took the mask off, tossing it on the grass somewhere. “Forgive me?”

Alright have whatever this is. I would’ve done more characters but im having some writers block. If you want a part two with someone I missed just comment or ask me. Requests are open sooo yea.

[deeppenguinstudent]

Nathaniel sat on the glacial floor, his gaze perpendicular to rise and fall of Jean's chest. It was not less than an hour ago when Jean stumbled into their shared room, gaping wounds strung all across his arms and axiomatic bruises in the shape of fingerprints coated with blood.

At first, all Nathaniel felt was extreme fatigue and vexation at Riko's venture to hurt Jean; especially since the Master had made everyone run extra laps during practice. As sad as it was, Jean and Nathaniel had gotten used to Riko's antagonising - it was their endless, despondent routine of agony and sorrow that they had no choice but to grit their teeth and endure.

However, it was what Jean had confessed softly to him as Nathaniel was too busy stitching up his injuries. Jean usually turned unnervingly honest when he was in pain, which would be a trait to adore if it wasn't so heartbreakingly wrenching how frequently it occurred.

"Stop moving, Jean," Nathaniel ticked his tongue as he felt Jean's body quivering, "You're going to make me drop the needle."

"I'm... sorry," Nathaniel's head instantly snapped up as he heard Jean's voice crack. He cursed as he felt the needle pierce his skin but didn't pay any mind to the blood trickling down his finger. All he could focus on was the tears streaming down Jean's face, staining it with the woes of a boy that Nathaniel so dearly loved.

The boy that Nathaniel would gladly lay down his humanity for. Grayson would know - he had a permanent scar from the pen Nathaniel had lodged in the side of his throat.

Nathaniel reached out his injured hand towards Jean, delicately shifting Jean's cheek so he was facing Nathaniel and his tears poured on top of the bedsheet. It was a silent plea to let him into Jean's mind, coaxing him to open up and allow Nathaniel to shoulder the burden for him.

When Jean shook his head, Nathaniel let out an aggravated sigh. His heartbeat grew faster in exasperation, and he felt his eyes twitch. There was only one person that Jean would never tattle on.

"What the hell did Kevin do now?"

It was stupid, really; how Jean thought that Nathaniel wouldn't be able to swiftly catch onto him. They'd be partners for years. Their souls were tethered to one another. They moved in synchronised steps, and they were the only one's who saw the other at their most wretched state.

Nonetheless, the person who had always been the protagonist in their countless arguments was Kevin Day. To say Nathaniel disliked Kevin was an understatement; he loathed him down to every hair on his body. Jean was the only reason he had tolerated the diva in the first place, but that didn't stop an unbridled wave of jealousy washing over him whenever Jean came back to their room with a smile on his face after hanging out with Kevin.

It was the only sentient that Riko and Nathaniel had ever shared really; they hated their partners getting closer to each other.

Jean shrunk under Nathaniel's gaze, more tears welled in his eyes as he spoke, "It wasn't his fault, don't blame him Nat."

"Sure it wasn't. What did he do, Jean?"

"He spoke in French." Jean took a moment to catch his breath, "In front of Riko."

Nathaniel clenched his teeth and willed himself not to storm into Kevin's room and knock the living daylights out of him. He breathed in deeply as Jean flopped onto the bed in pure lethargy. Jean was more important right now, Nathaniel would just have to check Kevin extra hard during practice. He squashed down a smile when he imagined the horrors he would bestow on Kevin once he decided to grace Nathaniel with his suffocating presence.

The door was knocked shortly after Jean succumbed to his tiredness and fell into a slumber. Nathaniel eventually took refuge on the bed beside him before groaning as the knocking grew insistent. He opened up the door, prepared to tell the person on the other side of the door to piss off.

That was until a pair of unsettling green eyes stared back at him.

"I need to-"

"No."

Kevin furrowed his eyebrows at the immediate shutdown but foolishly proceeded to try again, "Come on, Nathaniel, I need to see Jean."

Nathaniel scoffed as he leaned against the doorframe, allowing Kevin to see Jean's sleeping frame, "You've seen him. Now, fuck off before Riko comes lurking here and claws out his eyeballs for looking at you."

"Nathaniel-"

The door slammed shut right in Kevin's face.

[nyoomerr]

Another silly prompt if you’d like:

Shen Qingqiu starts exhibiting ‘symptoms’ of being some fraction Heavenly Demon thanks to every heavenly demon he’d met previously feeding him their blood.

(Maybe he and Binghe came across some artifact meant to ‘awaken one’s bloodline’ and/or Airplane had some cut plot-line about an artificial heavenly demon for Binghe to fight).

ok i said no more prompts for now but i've been thinking about a really stupid idea for this one and i couldn't stop thinking about it so dfkjh here it is!!

---

There’s no reason to suspect anything is out of the ordinary, at first. The visiting dignitary and his troupe are exceedingly deferential to both Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu in equal measure; not unusual, considering the amount of importance Luo Binghe places on having Shen Qingqiu treated well. 

Lesser demons have been beheaded for conveniently ‘forgetting’ to greet their emperor’s human spouse with enough respect. More politically empowered demons - the ones that understand just how important it is to respect a powerful demon’s demands for his wife - have had trade agreements stalled and family honor lost for being too nice to Shen Qingqiu, crossing Luo Binghe’s hair-trigger alarm for any potential competition to his Shizun’s attention. 

Taking both extremes into account, the safest bet is usually to treat Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu with the same level of esteem. Indeed, this visiting dignitary’s actions are very normal.

…Or they had started as such, and then Shen Qingqiu had let his guard down, and now they’re on day three of this particular political visit and things seem to have shifted ever so slightly to the left.

The little lordling is still plenty respectful to them both, of course, and he hasn’t started looking too long or too kindly at Shen Qingqiu, so it isn’t - erm, it isn’t any any sort of wife plot, trying to stir up jealousy with the stallion protagonist. 

Instead, it’s both more and less alarming than that: this demon has somehow gotten it into his head that Shen Qingqiu is in charge here. 

Never mind what Luo Binghe may or may not have to say about such a thing!! This is about the law of the land - the actual, real emperor between the two of them is Luo Binghe, if only because Luo Binghe knows well that Shen Qingqiu couldn’t tolerate the work of such a position. Part time empresses, part time peak lords got to have naps; Luo Binghe didn’t get those unless Shen Qingqiu thickened his face and made gestures from the bed that may or may not be construed as requests for cuddles. Shut up.

Anyway, the point is thus: Luo Binghe is emperor of the demonic lands. Shen Qingqiu is to be treated well when he decides he wants to participate in a bit of demonic politicking, but he is not supposed to be the one little visiting dignitaries look to for the final decision.

Shen Qingqiu tries to ignore it, of course. If he pretends he doesn’t notice, maybe Luo Binghe will do the same, and then there’s less of a chance of Luo Binghe being weird about it in bed later!

But as the days stretch on, the visiting dignitary seems to become more confident in his decision on which one of them is in charge, and it finally comes to a head during the feast on the final day: the little lordling seats himself to the side of Shen Qingqiu, rather than that of Luo Binghe.

Shen Qingqiu shifts uncomfortably in his seat, glancing over the top of his fan at the dignitary. Surely, he’ll realize his mistake here…?

“Lord Shen,” the demon lord says, seemingly oblivious to the tension throughout the banquet hall as everyone watches the political misstep in action. “Once more, our people can only thank you and your husband for the hospitality you’ve afforded us during this visit. The agreement between our lands will -”

Shen Qingqiu closes his fan with a snap, drawing himself up with a mental tirade of a thousand of his best curses. That really is the last straw - if he doesn’t correct this mistake now, Luo Binghe might really decide to do something petty and violent later to correct the offense!

“Lord Xia,” Shen Qingqiu says, voice perfectly level. “It appears as if you may have had one too many drinks this afternoon; your place is over there.” 

Saying as such, Shen Qingqiu gestures sharply with his fan to Luo Binghe’s other side. The dignitary pauses, glancing between Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu.

“...No,” he says slowly, “I’m - that is, this lowly one is fairly certain his loyalty is to Lord Shen…”

Shen Qingqiu glances up to the heavens, which have surely forsaken him many years ago. Oh, why did this stupid little man have to word it like that!!

“Xia Yang had best remember what is and is not his,” Luo Binghe says lowly. “The only one allowed to pledge such loyalty to Shizun is myself.”

Xia Yang once more glances between the two of them, his expression growing more confused by the moment. 

“Is Lord Shen… not the demon emperor of this realm?��

Shen Qingqiu stares at him. To his side, Luo Binghe is staring too, though with a far more shrewd expression; clearly, he’s trying to parse this response out as either an acceptable excuse for being too friendly with Shen Qingqiu or not.

“I’m afraid Lord Xia is mistaken,” Shen Qingqiu says when it becomes clear that Luo Binghe is busy being silent and brooding. “This lord is quite human.”

The visiting dignitary’s brows draw together, and then slowly he tilts his head up, scenting the air. 

“...Is Lord Shen sure?” Xia Yang asks, clearly uncertain. “Of course, I had heard of the tales of Luo Binghe and his human spouse, but Lord Shen is…”

“Speak plainly, or lose your tongue,” Luo Binghe snaps.

Shen Qingqiu sighs, reaching over to rap his knee under the table sharply. This sticky disciple of his, always so snappish when it comes to what others say about Shen Qingqiu, ah! This scum villain has had to tolerate far worse things said about him than this sort of mistake, you know!

“It is only that Lord Shen’s blood is clearly of heavenly demon origin,” the little lordling says, shifting uncomfortably under the scrutiny. 

Shen Qingqiu feels a bit mortified. Has he - has he really consumed that much of Luo Binghe’s blood??

“Xia Yang smells my own blood in Shizun’s veins,” Luo Binghe says, still looking a bit ruffled. “Shizun is human.”

“All due respect to Lord Luo,” Xia Yang says, “but Lord Shen’s heavenly demon blood is distinct from your own. It -”

Xia Yang cuts off, his mouth shutting so fast he seems to almost bite his own tongue right off and his cheeks coloring a scandalized pink. Shen Qingqiu feels a sense of great foreboding for what is about to be said next.

“Speak,” Luo Binghe hisses.

“Lord Shen’s bloodline is clearly the same as Lord Luo’s,” Xia Yang says in a rush. “This one isn’t sure how close, but it - ah, from the smell of his blood, this one thought Lord Shen might be Lord Luo’s father, or perhaps an uncle…”

The banquet hall is dead silent. Shen Qingqiu feels a bit faint. 

“Tianlang-jun,” he says, mostly to himself. 

“And that snake, too,” Luo Binghe agrees, his eyes flashing and his demonic qi writhing around him. “Shizun, you said they were dead.”

“They are!” Shen Qingqiu exclaims, still feeling a bit regretful about it. “But - well, it isn’t like I could siphon their blood out! It’s all mixed up in there!”

Luo Binghe gnashes his teeth, glaring down at the table. He looks very much like he wishes his parental family was still alive, actually, just so he could have the pleasure of serving them a beat down for putting their blood in Shen Qingqiu’s body and causing this misunderstanding in the first place.

“Lord Shen… has consumed the blood of several heavenly demons?” Xia Yang asks curiously. Shen Qingqiu almost wants to yell at him to read the room just a bit, ah!

“Indeed,” Shen Qingqiu says instead, his voice positively frosty. “So as Lord Xia can see, there has been a misunderstanding: this Lord is human.”

Xia Yang blinks, looks between Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe a final time, and gets up to exchange seats so he’s finally sitting in the proper location. Shen Qingqiu reaches blindly for his wine. Ah, that poor little demon, he really will end up on the shit side of things, after riling Luo Binghe up this much! And this political visit had been going so well, too -!

Shen Qingqiu glances over at Luo Binghe. He does not, in fact, look quite so furious as he had a moment prior. Instead, he’s watching Xia Yang with a look that is very, very concerning to Shen Qingqiu.

“...You said Shizun smelled like he could be my father?” Luo Binghe asks quietly, the tips of his ears pink.

Ah. Never mind. That poor little demon would see his end by Shen Qingqiu’s hand, for what he’s just done to their bedroom life!!

[sapphic-agent]

Let's Talk About Shinsou

*Note: Lmao, do I tag this as Anti Shinsou or Pro Shinsou??*

Despite being a pretty popular character overall, Shinsou seems to be under a lot of scrutiny with my fellow Bakugou antis. And I understand why. Our first introduction to him isn't a pleasant one; he's first shown taunting Class 1A about being attacked by villains (a generally traumatic experience) out of jealousy. It's also been noted that Aizawa spends more time training him than his actual class (though, this is more of an issue with Aizawa than Shinsou). Personality wise, he (subjectively) isn't pleasant or very entertaining either.

I'm impartial to him myself as I don't love him or hate him. He's just... there really (a fate many characters suffer). But you know what I think of when I think about Shinsou's character? Wasted potential.

My Hero Academia is constantly tossing the term rival around the show. There's the rivalry between Izuku, Bakugou, and Todoroki which is why they became the main trio (don't @ me for this I'm speaking technicalities here). There's also the infamous (one-sided) rivalry between All Might and Endeavor, a driving force behind not only Endeavor's actions against his family but a large part of the overall plot of the show.

When I first watched the Sports Festival and Izuku's match with Shinsou, I was positive they were setting them up to be rivals.

No, I don't mean the "rivalry" Izuku has with Bakugou (Bakugou stans don't @ me). I don't mean the friendly rivalries he has with Todoroki or Iida either.

I mean a straight-up rivalry. Where they don't become friends. Where they don't get along with or like one another (maybe a grudging respect at the most). I was sure Shinsou was going to be someone to constantly challenge Izuku; not only on a physical level, but ideologically too.

The Sports Festival partially set this up by calling attention to the similarities between Izuku's past and Shinsou's. While Izuku was discriminated against for his lack of quirk, Shinsou was treated differently and outcast because he had a "villainous" quirk. But they take on two different attitudes. Shinsou is bitter and full of contempt while Izuku was optimistic and determined to help a world full of people who shunned him. The show was deliberately setting up parallels between them.

But this dynamic is almost non-existent. Whatever interaction they do get is towards the end of the manga (Shinsou was introduced in the Sports Festival, an extremely early part of the series and in the show he's non-existent until season 5). And there's none of the previous complexity there was before.

Even if Shinsou was unlikable overall, it might have been worth it for him to be Izuku's real rival. His opposite not only in personality and attitude, but also heroics. Izuku can rely on his strength and the powers OF A give him, Shinsou would have to rely on his skills and brain. Their quirks are somewhat opposite to one another (at least in how they use them). Seeing them have to work together even though they'd usually approach things differently would have been way better than what we usually get.

I think that dynamic would have been a lot more interesting to watch than the trio or whatever you can Izuku and Bakugou (I will not refer to them as the Wonder Duo because wtf is that).

What do my fellow antis think? Would Shinsou have been a good rival if written well enough? Is there anyone else you would have preferred? Personally, I'd take anything over Izuku and Bakugou.

*Note: While we're on this topic, I think Monoma could have been Bakugou's rival. Someone who's calm and collected to contrast Bakugou's temper and whose quirk can easily rival his. I would have preferred that over subjecting Izuku to abuse under the guise of rivalry. I really wish Horikoshi would have kept them separate and allowed them to grow as heroes on their own without their toxic, codependent relationship. Maybe I would have tolerated Bakugou more. Monoma also isn't bothered by Bakugou so he wouldn't have had to go through the same thing Izuku did*

[mikuni14]

The Sign - Ep 4

*sexy sound*: hooya! This series keeps on giving ✨

Let me start by saying that this whole police-investigative part is extremely silly, funny and not reflecting reality (apart from the moment when captain inspector team leader Akk says "that a victim is a victim no matter the gender"), but who am I kidding! I'm not here to analyze police work! So I completely ignore this part. Although I must admit that the police part provides incredible entertainment in the form of Captain Inspector Team Leader Akk (always), the introduction of a new, cool character accompanied by the dramatic sounds of classical music, or the interruption of an intense scene between MLs with important information about the discovery of severed genitalia 👌👌

Apart from that, as always, I like everything. I love how Tharn is shown as just a regular horny gay dude who just thinks about dicks lol How many other BLs, where b stands for BOY, show this? I also like that his fantasies are of him letting Phaya do things to him, being vulnerable by exposing his neck, being pinned down, covered by his lover's body. I also liked that Tharn relives these fantasies in the light of day and indulges in them 🤩 Oh, "sleep wherever you like" was an invitation and that's a fact you will have to pry from my cold, dead hands 😤

I love how this show keeps creating "their things", constantly building them into a couple that has their own behaviors and traits in common, before they even become a real couple. Now it's a shirt grabbing. I love it, I love it when something like this appears and I know 100% that I and the rest of the fans are in these moments like 👀👀 *di Caprio pointing at tv meme*. For me, it's a very important part of a romance when the couple has their "things". "Don't let me hear you talking about you being dead ever again" is such a powerful phrase. Raw. Just as Phaya likes.

I REALLY LIKED THIS WHOLE SCENE WITH THE FURIOUS PHAYA. Everything was perfect here. I really like that Phaya got the opportunity to show this side of him. That he is shown as an angry man, that he is not an ideal man who can control his - also negative - emotions in every situation. Normally, I don't like or tolerate such situations, because the reasons for such outbursts are usually stupid. In this case, I absolve Phaya of his aggressive behavior and his outburst of anger towards Tharn, pushing him away. It wasn't ignoring his calls, which Phaya immediately confronted and resolved. It wasn't an outburst out of jealousy or something like that. This is a completely different, serious situation that only partially concerns his relationship with Tharn. I'm absolutely sure that Phaya has often wondered whether he is mentally ill and that it is a source of a serious fear for him. Mental illness is a taboo in all cultures around the world, as Tharn himself says at the beginning of the series regarding his visions. A physically ill person will be perceived differently than a mentally ill person and Tharn knows this, PHAYA KNOWS THIS and Dr. Poison knows this. The second thing is that Phaya genuinely cares for and trusts Tharn. So at this point Phaya is in agony because not only has his most personal fears been brought to light, it was done by a stranger, a person he can't stand, who is his rival, who finishes him off with the final blow in a calm way when everything inside him is falling apart, but what's more, the blow came from a direction that Phaya DIDN'T expect at all. Phaya asks Tharn several times: "Why did you do that?" because he feels BETRAYED. Phaya is also a proud man who wants his beloved to see only "good and cool" qualities in him, which is completely normal in any relationship, hence his heartbreaking question "DO YOU THINK I'M NUTS?" Really, this scene is great: - Phaya angry, humiliated, hurt, betrayed, barely able to control himself (but even then he doesn't hurt Tharn, the scene is full of aggression and screaming, but Phaya never once crosses the impassable (for me) boundary, he doesn't beat Tharn, it's not even a fight, only two adult, trained men, one of whom pins the other) -Tharn, who is shocked because for the first time Phaya ignores him, does not look at him, it is clear that he is truly angry with him. You can see how Tharn is lost in this new situation, as he stands uncertainly and asks "I'm talking to you. Can you hear me?". And even then, he immediately shows concern for Phaya and his wound on his forehead

I'm grateful for showing this version of Phaya, and also for showing him as a silly, goofy guy throughout the episode in various funny scenes. 👌👌

My theory is that Tharn didn't tell the doctor about Phaya's dreams, I feel like the doctor KNOWS about everything and is a figure who simply has knowledge of what's going on as a deity. He knows when Tharn is especially close to Phaya, as seen in the temple scene, the kiss scene, in breaking of the photo frame, also when he tells Phaya that they will see each often other from now on, when he invites him to dinner with the clear intention of destroying him. I feel like the doc just KNOWS about Phaya's dreams.

Wild theory time! To expand on my original theory, this old woman/girl has helped Wansarat in the past and is helping him now. Wansarat is reborn and in each incarnation dies in childhood as punishment for what he did while saving his lover, Garuda. But this time he survived because he was placed under the care of the abbot of the temple, which is,in a way, his temple. And now, for a first time, Wansarat as Tharn is all grown up and delicious and the one for whom Wansart was originally intended - Dr. Bitch - he finally has a chance to get him. If it weren't for that Pesky Bird 😀

[anathemafiction]

Helloooo! I was wondering how do the ROs measure up self esteem wise? Like how do they see themselves? Do they think they’re attractive? Ugly? Why? What’s their favorite and least favorite quality about themselves? Please answer as much or as little as you want! Thank you <3333

Hadrian is close to oblivious to his own good looks. He doesn't suffer from any self-esteem issue, nor is he self-conscious about any part of himself — he just doesn't feel any sense of pride about it either. He's never really thought about it. He didn't have a reason to for most of his life. 

Now that he's a mercenary and experiencing more of the world... he's starting to become more aware of his appearance, but so far, Hadrian is still pretty clueless. He's a conventionally attractive man, but I don't think he'd called himself so. He wouldn't call himself ugly, either. To him, he's just... he's Hadrian. 

Alessa isn't so oblivious. She knows she can attract eyes, and that's something she has used to her advantage before. She doesn't like it very much, though. Alessa would rather not be noticed a all, and she does a pretty good job of it. As what she thinks of herself? Alessa likes her eyes and she likes her body — because it's healthy and able, and she can run fast, jump or duck, or do whatever she needs to stay alive. 

She... tolerates her hair. She's seen women with long, midnight locks of silky hair, and jealousy is for fools, but Alessa felt something akin to it. Sometimes, while she's brushing her hair, she wishes it could be longer and darker and softer too. She wishes her hands, scarred and wounded, could be as delicate as those noblewomen. She wishes...

But wishing is for fools, and Alessa wishes nothing at all. 

Alain thinks himself extremely handsome. It's not even a front, the man really believes it. And, to be fair to him, he is. He looks good, he feels good, Alain has no self-esteem issues — not when it comes to his looks. 

Ysabella is very much like Alain, although she wasn't always so. As a young girl, she wished she could have freckles — she wished it so hard for months on end. But then freckles weren't half as important as having a bottom nose, all delicate and full and so unlike hers. She prayed every night by her window, with her eyes shut tight, but alas, the Lord never granted her a different nose. It didn't matter though, because young Bella saw a beautiful, beautiful girl with braided golden hair, and oh! She suddenly wanted hair the color of gold too. 

With time, Ysabella stopped wishing for any other body than hers. Which wasn't very hard to do when you look like her. She likes what she sees in the mirror, although, I wouldn't say Ysbaella considers herself beautiful. Charming, yes. Lovely, even, but not beautiful. But there's no one part of herself that she'd change. 

The Pirate King doesn't think he's particularly good-looking, but that doesn't matter a bit because attractiveness, he's found, comes from how one carries himself. And there are few things women answer as strongly as confidence. He's scarred, his hair is wind battered, his skin rough from the sun, his teeth crooked in places — and even so, the Pirate walks with a swagger, hands firm on the handles of his axes, and he doesn't feel a little bit ashamed. 

Plus, he thinks he's got a great sense of style. He isn't ugly, and if there's one thing he likes about himself is his muscles. He knows he looks good naked. Other than that... if fate had granted him just a little bit of extra height, he wouldn't have opposed it. 

Neia is an interesting one. On one hand, she's very aware of the effect she has on women. She doesn't need to try very hard to win someone to warm her bed, it usually just entails a sharp look, a slow smile, and a nudge of the head. On the other hand, Neia barely looks in the mirror. She just doesn't care. She has a deep scar on her cheek, twisting her lip in a perpetual snarl, and she couldn't care less. She has broad shoulders, thick thighs, and harsh hands, so unlike what's expected of women — and again, she thinks nothing of it. 

Has she been called ugly? No, but who would call the head of the Inquisitor anything but "Your Excellency"? But if some suicidal fool did call her ugly, Neia would think nothing of it. She wouldn't call herself that, though. 

Lance will tell you he has no balms about his appearance. Look at him, he'd say, with his arms opened wide. Look at his vest, his hair, and the gold on his tooth. He wants to be seen, and why would one want to be seen if one didn't think one was worth seeing? His smile is wide and pleasant, his eyes amused, and you wouldn't think for a moment that the spy was lying. 

But lying he would be because Lance has parts of himself that he doesn't like. Or maybe like isn't the right word. There are parts of himself that Lance can't even look at. Is he ashamed of them? He is. Would he change them? In a heartbeat. 

Does he consider himself handsome? He does not. But, then again, what do looks matter when compared with talent? And if there's one thing Lance knows he has, is talent. 

Rafael thinks he's... Rafael doesn't like to think about himself much. To be honest, the bastard doesn't think he's very good-looking, no, but in the grand scheme of things, that doesn't matter much. His character flaws — his choices — are the things Rafael is truly ashamed of. So what if people don't like his hair or insult his goatee, or say his cloak needs replacement? He'll sneer at them, maybe throw an insult or two, and put them off his mind. 

He doesn't care. He doesn't care at all. But he flinches every time, and when he's talking to someone he finds attractive, Rafael will sometimes have trouble holding their gaze. And he avoids smiling too, because there's a gap in his teeth, and when he takes off his shirt, he's aware he's too scrawny. He's too goddamn—

Doesn't matter though. To hell with them all. Rafael doesn't care.

[theleechyskrunkly]

16, 20, and 21 for all the skrunklies

EHEHEHHEHEHE THESE ARE GOOD ONES

16- For Paige:

His pain tolerance is intermediate. Being raised in an extremely well off family and being carefully sheltered for most of his life, Paige has had very rare encounters with pain. But when he does experience pain, he tends to jolt, momentarily freeze, then move on or make a calculated decision on what to do next, depending on the amount of pain inflicted (this is the exact sequence in which he reacted when he started drowning. When he realized he couldn't swim back up, he just froze and let himself sink).

He hasn't experienced a lot of things more painful than being stomped on by hundreds of adults as a 9 year old 💀

For Aurinelle:

This guy has some intense pain tolerance. You could torture him with boiling hot water and he wouldn't bat an eye. I mean ask Floyd, no matter how many times he squeezes Aurinelle, it's as if he were giving him a massage instead of choking! And that cheeky smirk when he sees that Floyd has given up on squeezing the life out him, makes Floyd cranky as hell.

20- For Paige:

Paige actually is a pretty jealous person! But he doesn't really show it. He doesn't want to seem possessive and make whoever is causing him jealousy uncomfortable.

His jealousy usually manifests when he's having a conversation with someone he really likes, but when he sees them talking to someone else, they seem happier than when they're with him. He just lets it happen and shrinks back to allow the person to do whatever they want. He thinks that maybe he's just bored them or that he's not all that important in their life.

For Aurinelle:

Aurinelle is the manifestation of petty. He doesn't get jealous easy, but when he does he makes it pretty obvious.

If someone makes him jealous for whatever reason, he resorts to giving them the cold shoulder. Ignoring texts, not listening when they try to ask him what's wrong, plus other petty tactics.

When it comes to who he's jealous of, he decides to assert dominance (male alpha moment 😭) by purposely making his aura more intimidating and making himself look bigger (for literally no reason. You're already a giant dude).

Oh, and he pouts. And glares. He pouts and glares a lot.

21- For Paige:

I answered this previously, but that was for a different ask game, so I'll answer it again!

Paige has undiagnosed PTSD Type 2, also known as ASD(Acute Stress Disorder) as well as Agoraphobia, the fear of crowds and places that may cause panic, helplessness, and/or embarrassment.

Paige isn't aware of his ASD, and he could've gotten treatment for it before it developed into PTSD, but his parents never took him to a therapist after the events that caused him a trauma, so he's never actually dealt with it in any way.

He deals with his Agoraphobia by just staying as far away from crowds as possible.

For Aurinelle:

Oof this guy. Aurinelle has undiagnosed PTSD type 4, also known as Complex PTSD, which consists of multiple experienced traumas instead of just one, and is easier to trigger than uncomplicated PTSD. He also has panic and anxiety disorder, all which he developed when he was young, heightening his sensitivity to dangerous situations. He is also claustrophobic :(

As I said previously, these illnesses are undiagnosed, so Aurinelle is unaware he has them. When he notices symptoms, he dismisses them as siren survival instincts instead of actually acknowledging them.

He refuses to admit he's claustrophobic (he thinks Azul or the tweels will use it against him).

GOODNESS GRACIOUS THIS IS LONG 😨

Tagging: @elenauaurs @distant-velleity @cyanide-latte @xen-blank @thehollowwriter for silly oc ask games :D

[cloudyinthecloset]

7. What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?

Dream definitely got hornier LOL He's an absolute slut now, shameless, horny bastard man with no decency. Night became more scientific and experimental, he's got some serious Sci qualities to him now.

5. How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?

I hate to be that person, but it really depends on what it is that he wants. There aren't many things Night wants, at least in terms of material goods. Being a king comes with perks, like being gifted his desires or already having the money to purchase it. The one thing Night always craves is knowledge, he's constantly seeking to learn more, but even that can usually be given or bought. Still, Night has done some extreme stuff in the name of science and discovery, including but not limited to putting his safety at risk, neglecting himself, and crossing boundaries to get the data he wants. Although Night claims it's selfless and for the sake of advancement, he always gets some rather selfish satisfaction out of it. He isn't willing to risk harming or killing someone, but he may push into discomfort and inconvenience. Just cooperate, it's best for everyone.

14. How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?

Night always wants to appear as a strong, competent, strict ruler. He is a King and he holds himself accordingly in both his visage, action, and words. However, Night doesn't want to be feared, and he's working hard to change the image many of the Omega Timeline's inhabitants have of him. He is gentle and soft to children or those seeking help, offering wealth, his power, and his knowledge to assist, but he refuses to let anyone think they can take advantage of him. While he is gracious and thankful for the offerings he receives, he makes it clear his kindness is not to be mistaken for weakness. Even around his beloved Marked Night wants to be perceived as highly capable and no-nonsense, although they know he'll put up with more of their bullshit than he'd ever admit. More than anything Night does not want to be pitied, he absolutely loathes the idea of others feeling sorry for him.

6. How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?

Just like his brother, it would be pretty damn hard to convince Dream to go against his moral compass, even harder actually since he's still very morally black and white. While Night has had centuries of experience to expand his thinking into very grey areas, Dream hasn't and thus perceives things far more starkly, although he's getting better at understanding and accepting the nuances of certain situations. While Night could potentially be convinced to be immoral for the greater good of the multiverse or those he loves, Dream would fight tooth and nail to uphold his moral standards. He might have forgiven Night for the terrible acts he committed in the name of the balance, but that doesn't mean he condones them, nor that he'll tolerate them happening again.

23. What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?

Interestingly, Dream struggles with feelings of neutrality and apathy. It's very rare for him to not feel anything in particular about something and thus he's never sure what to do in those situations. He usually fakes something positive or negative instead of letting himself express his lack of strong feelings. Dream thinks he must feel something, anything at all, and forces himself to have opinions about everything.

20. Does your OC have a tendency to get jealous? If so, how does this manifest?

Night and Dream are more protective and a bit possessive as opposed to jealous. Night can get insecure which leads to some minor jealousy, but lots of reassurances help, and after being Marked all that goes away. Dream knows he's hot shit, he's well aware he's got it all, so he doesn't necessarily get jealous but possessive instead because excuse you, they are his. Once again being Marked fixes that issue no problem.

[stinkysarai]

idk why but i feel like the funniest and also most annoying thing i see with atla characters is like. how theyre pushed into a VERY small box and mostly known for/ characterized with like. a certain aspect of them.

tell me why i constantly see ‘mom friend katara shes so momcore motherly’ posts. like yeah i guess so but shes more than just a motherly person guys!! shes a teenage girl with anger and rage and a very very strong passion for justice! shes a teenage girl who was forced to mature and clearly dislikes the motherly part of herself!!! cmon guys shed be so upset if she was only known for being a ‘mother hen’ or something!!

aang. poor aang literally hes either a 'pacifist saint scared of confrontation and has no guts' or an 'evildoer thats the founder of frowntown' or some shit. did we watch the same show?? i mean i was a little sleep deprived when i watched it yeah but i dont think aang was the true villain of atla… i think that was ozai? just a guess ? (sarcastic) idk. i just think its crazy that this little fella is usually seen in such a bad light

sokka. my boy sokka brah see hes like. hes a strange thing. i feel like there could be a buzzfeed quiz of Which Sokka Are You? and the options are buff stupid ass himbo that gets girls , annoying male manipulator/manchild that hurts women, mean big brother thats only ever sarcastic and annoying and cynical and NEVER shows any emotion other than hatefulness, spite, and jealousy, or sunshine happy funny guy that aspires to be a comedian and never has any emotions or personality other than butt of the joke/ jokester. and even then those are like. BROAD options. i could get so much more specific but like. i wont because im lazy. it just. it peeves me a little bit but to be fair i am the same type of person to go YOU DONT GET MY FAVE LIKE I DO even though i am bad at overanalyzing characters. sokkas my fave so i might just be spewing nothin but pure ass takes (dont criticize me ill cry)

toph. AUGHHHH IT GETS ME SO MAD!! why is she a mean ass no tolerance no respect girl!! why is it thay most of the time they make her out to be some girl that is mean to others because ‘its funny!!1!1!’ and will never listen and also hates everyone and is unnecessarily violent. THAT or they make her out to some ‘i’m secretly really sweet and nice and kindheartedmaxxed but i hide myself with ANGER and violence and rebellion…’ type of person that acts like a tsundere in extreme comedy animes. like giys please why are there two extremes that neither of which are good!!

dont get me started on zuko because once i start i wont stop . WHY WHY WHY!!!! i scream to the midnight sky as raindrops down my despaired face… WHY is it that hes either a small, shy, vulnerable sack of twigs who cant defend himself and needs his alpha sigma buff boyfriend(s) to defend him at all times or a buff ass strong extremely mean jerk thats also ‘a bad boy with a big heart’ that smirks 25/8 and is sad all the time and in his feels. guys like… WHY?? HES NOT .. GUYS olease. Please please please

pisses me off man! but to be fair i am VERY particular about a lot of thijgs and like. no shame / hate truly. im just a fella who cant shut up, living my life happy go lucky and filled with love and hate. if this offends you PLEASE DONT HURT ME im just a feller!!! a person in this big big world!! twas just a rant!

[marshmallowprotection]

Hi! I would like to ask for a romantic match-up if you don't mind and whenever you have time~ This is my first time doing this, so I am not sure how to do it properly. Thank you very much in advance!

My name is Dione, and I go by her/she pronouns. I am an undergraduate student of Political Science, a consistent academic achiever, and I plan to become a public attorney in the future. My zodiac sign is Libra with Virgo moon.

I am 4′ 11″ in height, petite in body type, and I wear rose gold eyeglasses and braces. I like dressing myself up, especially with a barrette, bowknot hair clip, heels, or jewelry, because it makes me feel more confident and good about myself. I have soft features and feminine energy. 

Although I am reserved and careful around unfamiliar crowds and new people, I will become perky and playful if I vibe with them almost instantly. I usually connect with individuals who are far smarter or better than me in any area because I enjoy learning new and more things from them as long as it is within my range of interests. However, after socialization, I need dedicated alone time to recharge my energy.

I am an ambitious but not competitive, open-minded, patient, well-behaved, tolerant, flexible, and imaginative person. I have a weird and dark sense of humor. I like teasing and being brutally honest with people I am close with, but I will immediately stop once I notice they are uncomfortable and not all right with it. I often take leadership roles but do not mind if others lead instead of me as long as they are competent and reliable. I always know what I want but tend to think twice before committing and pursuing it.

Regarding my flaws, I have intellectual insecurity and imposter syndrome. I get tensed, skittish, and stressed easily. I like knowing and being included in almost everything, so I would not feel out of place. I am also a crybaby, a bit overthinker, and sensitive but only if it is related to the people or things I care about. I am quite easy to get along with, but I usually go MIA and tend to keep others at a distance (which is why it is difficult for me to maintain friendships). I am a procrastinator, but I can still manage to finish tasks on time.

I like fluffy stuffed toys, warm blankets, reading books, comics, and print cartoons, peaceful and cozy environment, docile cats, hugs and cuddles only to people I like or am familiar with, listening to music, staying at home, sweets, and potatoes. I enjoy playing games and watching others' game streams, seeing people being put in their places, and occasional and well-planned trips.

On the other hand, I dislike people who talk behind my back, violate my boundaries and personal space, and are irresponsible, overconfident, entitled, nosy, tardy, and reckless. I do not like rainy and overly sunny days, extremely hot and cold environments, dirty things, darkness, scary and horror genres, mathematics, awkward and uncomfortable situations, and physically exhausting activities.

I am straight~ My love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, and receiving gifts. I prefer a private but not secret relationship. I do not like casual dating and playing games, such as mind games, mixed messages, hot and cold treatment, playing hard to get, breadcrumbing, provoking jealousy, submarining, manipulation, and love-bombing, because I am a serious person, especially in this matter. I want depth, growth, stability, consistency, certainty, security, and devotion in a relationship (which is why I still do not have a real-life boyfriend since birth 😭).

Have a nice day! 🌷💕—Submission

I match you with...

Jumin!

Your idea of a relationship is something that is clear-cut. That means that you want something where there is no doubt in your mind about the way the other person feels. you want to know in your heart truly that they care about you and that there isn't a shadow of a doubt about it. There's nothing wrong with that, it can just be hard to find a relationship like that right off the bat. It takes a lot of hard work to be able to have that kind of trust with someone.

If somebody doesn't share that value with you, it can make it harder. It's why you need someone who shares your values, much like Jumin. His idea of a relationship is something that is personal. It's not in the public eye, even if people understand you're in a relationship. The details and everything that matters are only for you and your partner. Why share anything when it's only your business? Nobody needs to know the inner workings of your relationship. You only need to know where you stand with your partner.

Your love languages align. You value communication and gentle sincerity. He tells you what he means without blinking. You tell him what you feel without guessing. It makes for a healthy relationship in the end. You don't have to think that hard about it. He showers you with gifts that he knows you'll love, and you give him what he wants, a partner who listens and values his voice; Not the voice of his company, nor the voice that people expect him to have, but his actual voice.

[storyycool]

alright bro I NEED some sort of a plan and idk how well I’ll actually follow it but I’m very much losing control of my life again so here is some daily requirements I’m gonna force myself to do until I inevitably lose all motivation. 15min chores (can skip if it’s a work day)

15min work on school

15min some form of a workout

15min subliminals

1200 or under cals (I naturally gain more weight so if I eat a normal amount of food I gain way too much)

no freaky shit

talk at least once in each class at school (that’s a lot for me don’t judge a lot of people in my school really hate me right now even though I did NOTHING that affects them in any way)

anyway besides that today was alright, I ended up having to work but it wasn’t too bad and there were these 2 guys in there playing good music and barely any annoying coworkers there today which was cool. School sucked as usual but didn’t suck as bad as it did the past 2 days (I was EXTREMELY depressed both days) and also today I feel like my personality was a lot more tolerable than it’s been, what I mean is like when I talk sometimes it just comes out not right and it feels like it’s not really me talking. And I start acting really dry like I don’t really care and say random shit just to fill the empty space in the room. That probably won’t make sense to anyone but yeah. Today it felt a lot more like actually me and I had like an actual non awkward conversation with my dad which was cool because he’s really cool but I don’t think he likes me very much especially with the way I act and all. I’m so fucking tired of school bro, I have several missing projects that I REALLY don’t wanna do and a journalism class that I am going to fail because 1: we have to write about school and I fucking hate school, and 2: we have to interview people which is NOT gonna happen because I have a very intense fear of talking to people which sucks because I’m an extrovert but can’t socialize because of the way I am. Anyway enough yapping I’m gonna go watch some cool people on YouTube and cry of jealousy :)

[m4sk]

consider this an act of assistance, not of betrayal.

apologies for any repeats or confusing speech patterns, this has been typed over 4 days, we are extremely foggy headed and we took turns adding things

The issues inside are getting worse and me and Manasses are unable to leave Spooks alone. If one of us is to leave for any reason, Brooks steps in. Other than that, he is going between the memory room and the "evidence" to try find anything of use.

They are once more nitpicking your words and actions to try make it believable that you and our other father desire eachother more than them. Of course, we know better; we know you. Spooky however is not as content with that answer. They believe you have manipulated us in some way, to make us take your side. If you are interested in any further discussion of the beliefs or evidence, you may ask for any of the three working with your spouse. Given your, current state, they won't question it too much.

In relation to the previous issue, they have also had a spike in jealousy lately. They've been getting persistently wound up over your exes in random intervals, have started randomly checking blogs of people you know, they were near sick over the incident with Anthony's blog and are continually losing their temper at his lack of response to the messages they have sent.

They feel unsupported by just about everyone around them. Before anything else, this is not your own fault. They have obviously been struggling a great deal lately but feel as though they cannot speak of it due you having your own struggles that they deem more severe. They have also made little progress in terms of mental health support and are now falling behind in school.

They cannot keep up with the workload and attention has got even worse. They are falling behind in at least 5 classes and show no interest in catching up. They are agitated by the mere presence of pupils and staff alike. The teachers they'd usually enjoy the presence of have become harder to tolerate and children that they would have ignored suddenly fill them with an unspeakable rage.

Sticking to that topic, they are struggling to manage emotions. They never were good with them, they feel things in excess, but it is progressively getting worse. They can no longer hide fits of depression and have become more irritable than what is usual. They avoid their blood relatives like the plague and are agitated at so much as a text from anyone but you.

With a brief cycle back to the first point made, they have experienced more severe symptoms for their psychosis. They have been struggling to maintain themself as their paranoia has once more increased, and have been experiencing more frequent reality shifts. I believe one of us has explained this before but just to be sure I shall risk repeating myself - Spooky's delusions fall into a category labelled as 'Double Bookkeeping', meaning they live in two realities simultaneously. We have simply labelled these as Spooky's reality and Angel's reality. Spooky's reality is the delusions, while Angel's is the real world - the more sane of the two. Angel works to keep the two balanced if not closer to his side, but this task has become more challenging as time goes on. They are once more under the constant impression they are being watched, and are now convinced they are watched by ghosts of dead relatives. They have been going to the local graveyard to plead with their grandparents to leave them alone - which only makes things worse as they are now convinced communing with the spirits of the deceased has brought them closer. They further believe in their life being some social experiment, they think their life is a dream and they are going to wake up one of these nights, they now believe that they are dying.

At the time of writing it has been 13 days since Spooky took sick, and they have not recovered. The symptoms are not too bad - it's almost like a persistent head cold with more breathing difficulties and headaches. They have however decided it is entirely plausible they suddenly stop breathing and suffocate alone.

Now, for a more personal issue. Forgive any missing information on this part - Manny and Angel are a little busy and I was not present (or even alive) for a great deal of this.

Our family has seemingly taken a mass fit of misery. We all have our own issues, but are all collapsing mentally regardless. Spooky, as always, has taken it upon themself to deal with it. They are continually offering us reassurance and assistance for our individual issues. This has understandably caused them a significant amount of stress. They have been finding it harder to face all of us. They still love us the same, but they claim to have little reason to help us, as "[We] all broke [Them]".

Unlike our more tolerable family, the blood relatives have been less that tolerable, more specifically the hag. She has been mocking and doubting Spooks for their issues. Making them question the validity of their psychosis, taking the piss out of them if they're a little scruffy after depressive fits, refusing making proper accommodations for them to eat and sleep safely, and has suddenly took pleasure in making them relive old traumas. The most significant being a night shortly after you met Spooky, bastard child came at them with a knife. This has caused more paranoia and delusions, as well as a lack of trust for both him and his mother.

As a result of all this and more, Spooky has become more than tired. They have once more deemed death the only solution. We are actively working to redirect their mindset with little success so far. They are reverting to old associations for the sake of feeling young - and by extension small - again. They have taken to me as a replacement father and have expressed a greater interest in puppets and dolls again to cope with going back to being lifeless and used.

This has taken, so much from us. Hopefully it's of some use. If not, we are going to sob. If any queries are to be made or assistance is needed - ask. Spooks can only deny us a front for so long. We will if need be communicate via cryptic blogging.

Much love, your sons.

[scorbleeo]

Book Review: Caught Stealing

Leighton U (Book 2) by C. E. Ricci

Source: Google Images

It's not stealing if he's meant to be mine.

Let me tell you how Holden Sykes operates.

As the campus playboy and one-and-done king, he doesn’t do strings.

Or repeats.

Or names, for that matter.

So when he tries making my best friend the next notch on his bedpost, I react poorly.

Some would call it jealousy or an unrequited crush,

but friends protect each other from making mistakes.

The same ones I’ve already made.

Which is why driving Holden away seems like my only option.

Too bad he’s not giving up without a fight.

Each prank leads to another

until he turns this into a game far more precarious than intended.

One filled with stolen moments and heated glances,

drawing me into his orbit.

But the undeniable attraction simmering between us

leaves me caught in the crosshairs of an impossible decision.

Loyalty…or love.

Source: Goodreads (2023)

I Rarely Like a Series's Second Book, But Not This

I enjoyed this book so much, I am at lost with words. This usually never happens, but I have no idea how to construct a book review for Caught Stealing. And the fact that I went into this book just a couple of days after its publication is truly torturous, because I am not ready to wait as long as I will be for the next instalment.

Okay, as much as I seriously love this book, I also believe some people might find reading Caught Stealing icky because of the grey area. Grey area being were they cheating or not. However, I strive in grey areas and as someone who loathes adultery, whatever happened in Caught Stealing was not considered cheating, in my books. The slight problem I had was the lying. I am in no way advocating for Phoenix's decisions when he decided to lie to Kason but I understood why Phoenix thought what he did was the better out of two options. And so even though lying's icky to me, I empathised with Phoenix therefore I overlooked it.

Moving on, here are some highlights on the things I loved about Caught Stealing. First things first, I adore Phoenix Mercer so much, I refuse to accept criticisms on him and by that I mean, I ignore anything that complains about him. More people like Holden and tolerate Phoenix but in this household, Phoenix trumps Holden (as much as Holden's extremely lovable too). I think a part of Phoenix's appearance played into why I really liked this character as well. And honestly, him being a top was simply the cherry on top.

Next, the tension. I thought the tension between Oakley and Quinton back in Iced Out was already a good read. The tension between our lead characters here was so much more superior. The angry tension, the sexual tension, the tension when they are in their own heads. I don't know about Ricci but her writing here, specifically the tension, was done incredibly well.

Last but not least, I had a tiny complain when I read the previous book and it was that, I wished to read more about the side characters yet I really did not get much. This was not an issue here. Felt that Kason's character arc and development was quite a chaotic mess but considering the next book is about him, I will just wait till the next book to judge him. What I need to shine a spotlight on is Theo. I was enjoying reading about him way too much. 'Way too much' like its a complain because I will build expectation and sometimes, high expectations aren't ideal, especially when it comes to books.

I had so much fun reading Caught Stealing, it's not even a smiling matter anymore. It's been days since I finished this book and my head is still occupied by it and that has never happened with a sports romance novel.

Rating: ★★★★★

More reviews on Leighton U series: Iced Out

[ayyy-pee]

Chapter 3 - Library

Discord 18+ - Twitter - Kofi

Pairing: Suguru Geto x Female Reader

Summary: Suguru trying (and failing) to cope.

Genre:**College AU**

Story Warning: Smut, Vaginal Sex, Toxic Behavior, Jealousy, Jealous Behavior, Oral Sex, Unprotected Sex, Breeding Kink, Creampie, Possessive Sex, Possessive Behavior, Virgin Reader, Yandere Suguru, Emotional Cheating

Suguru Art by: Ilameys

After leaving you and Satoru to your own devices (oh and Utahime), Suguru continued his jog as usual, making his way back to the apartment he shared with Satoru. His feet hit the ground at a leisurely pace that brought him a sense of comfort. There was no need to rush back. Suguru inhaled deeply, glad that the strange painful twist in his stomach from before was fading. He was going to be ok.

And then his brilliant mind that never steered him wrong or worked against him reminded him of the flirty smile you wore as Satoru asked you out.

Who cares?

But his feet picked up the pace.

His mind continued its assault, barraging him with images of the way Satoru gently caressed the back of your hand with his thumb when he first introduced himself to you. The way your pupils dilated the moment Satoru took off his glasses to get a good look at you. And, ugh, the way he looked at you – like he wanted to eat you alive.

Suguru sped up, his feet slamming into the ground hard and fast. His breathing was ragged as he ran, trying to forget the way your cheeks darkened with the hint of a blush when Satoru told you that you had the most beautiful lips he’d ever seen.

Who even says that when they first meet someone? Satoru does.

Faster.

He wanted to squeeze his eyes closed so badly. He wanted to erase the way his stomach turned when he remembered the sound of your nervous laugh. It was soft and breathy and something he had never heard from you before. You had only ever shown abhorrence towards him, any laugh you directed his way was at his expense.

Faster. Faster.

His calves were on fire, burning similarly to the way he burned watching you and Satoru exchange numbers and make plans for you to come to their apartment for the fucking dinner Satoru offered to make you.

Could Satoru even cook?

In all the years Suguru had known Satoru, he didn’t think he had ever seen Satoru even make toast. He was loaded. He always ordered out or had one of his little conquests make something for him. Suddenly he wanted to make dinner for someone. And it had to be for you apparently.

His apartment door was approaching, but he didn’t want to slow down. He couldn’t slow down. Not when his mind was racing remembering how you melted under Satoru’s gaze. Suguru wondered why he even cared. That was the real question nagging at him.

The apartment door slammed hard behind Suguru as he entered and made his way to the kitchen. He swung the refrigerator door open with maybe a little more aggression than was necessary and snatched a bottle of water out. Chugging the cold beverage, Suguru relished in the relief he felt as his body cooled down.

In the past month Suguru had gotten to know you, your relationship teetered between mild tolerance and extreme hatred and one awkward instance between you two. He had learned you were bullheaded, childish, and insanely smart. You spent most of your time purposely ignoring him because you seemed to know it annoyed him more when you didn’t entertain his antics.

Suguru took another swig of his water, thinking back to the day you first gave him the silent treatment and the awkward moment that followed which you both refused to acknowledge.

-------------------

The Literature professor placed Suguru’s essay in his hand proudly. Upon seeing his perfect grade, Suguru shot you a smug smile from across the room. You both always tried to sit as far away from each other as possible when in the same room. Your nose scrunched in irritation. This was fairly normal for you two. You’d gloat silently to each other any chance you got, never turning down a chance to remind the other you were better.

“Suguru, as always…excellent work.” The professor commended. He made his way over to you, a gleaming smile spreading across his face.

“Y/n…wow. I must say…the way you narrated the rise and fall of the Russian Empire was absolutely riveting. I could not tear my eyes away from the page.” He chuckled as he moved back towards his desk at the front of the lecture hall. “My wife actually got on to me for not going to bed until 3 in the morning because I just could not put it down! Stellar work!”

You took your paper from the professor, smiling down at the grade written at the top of the page as well as some long notes the professor had jotted down. If anyone could describe Suguru’s expression, they would say it looked like he was about ready to blow the fucking roof off of the school. Suguru glared hard at you as you stared straight ahead, a small smirk on your lips. He waited. He waited for you to turn and silently brag about being better than him, but you never did. What the hell? That only made him angrier.

After class, he found himself rushing to pack up his belongings and racing after you.

“Not gonna brag on your ‘stellar work’?” He teased. “I knew it. You paid the professor to kiss your ass in front of the class back there. Let me see your grade, stupid. You probably got a B and don’t want me to see it.”

You didn’t respond. You kept walking, turning a corner sharply as you headed toward the library. A sly grin crept along his face.

“Oh my god, I’m right, aren’t I? You’re actually so stupid, you got a B? Looks like I’ll be graduating top dog. As I should be.”

Again, Suguru was met with silence from you as you both entered the library. What was your problem? Where was your usual fire? You swiped your student badge at the library entrance and kept walking, entering the staircase to take you up a level. Suguru quickly swiped his badge and followed.

“Hello? Suddenly you know when to shut your mouth?”

You ignored him again. Ok, enough of this shit. He grabbed your wrist and twirled you around to face him. You looked so bored. You couldn’t have looked less interested in talking to him if you tried.

“Why are you ignoring me?” He questioned. You shrugged, turning your head away from him and again, not speaking. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but he could tell something was off with you that day.

Suguru had no idea why you not responding was eating him alive, but he needed you to acknowledge him – to say anything to him at all. He brought his hand up to your cheek, gently turning your head to look at him. “Are you okay?” He winced at how soft his voice had come out when he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. He hadn’t meant for it to but maybe it was a good thing, because you finally looked at him, really looked at him. And for the first time, Suguru got a good look at your face and he thought you were beautiful. Your eyes were the most stunning shade and sparkled even in the dim lighting of the library stairwell you both stood in. And your lips…your lips were so...

You stared at him, wide eyed, as he took in your features. Suguru had never touched you before. He didn’t know what to expect. Maybe because when he usually looked at you, he could only see his enemy. You were a monster trying to take away everything he had worked for. Maybe he was expecting reptile scales. He just did not expect this velvety smooth surface lying beneath his palm. His hand resting on your cheek skimmed down to trace your jawline and his thumb came up to brush gently across your bottom lip. You both inhaled sharply at the contact, and Suguru watched with interest when your eyes closed as you let out a soft exhale. He liked this look on you. You were…attractive. He could admit that to himself.

Your face inched closer to his and his face inched closer to yours and at the slightest touch of the tip of your noses, the feel of your breaths mingling Suguru seemed to snap out of his daze. He dropped his hand from your face and laughed loudly, mockingly, the sound reverberating off the stairwell walls.

“Are you trying to kiss me, stupid?” He taunted. His feline eyes crinkled at the corners in amusement.

Your eyes snapped open. You took a step back and for a quick second, Suguru could see the embarrassment (and maybe a bit of sadness?) spread across your features. He almost felt bad until you opened your mouth.

“Please. As if I’d risk my own precious health to kiss a shit eating monkey like you.” You wore that familiar mean ass grin you had any time you saw him flinch at the nickname you gave him. With that, you whirled around and stomped the rest of the way up the stairs, leaving him alone with his thoughts. That was…weird to say the least. But it seemed to help restore order for you both. Although Suguru would need a few minutes in the stairwell alone to calm himself down afterwards.

You did ignore him again for a few days after your awkward encounter in the library. Suguru didn’t push you to interact. He chalked it up to you feeling uncomfortable or embarrassed about what happened because he felt the same way. Everything eventually returned to normal, and he was glad for it. Neither of you ever brought up the library incident again.

-------------------

The door to the apartment swung open bringing Suguru back to the present. Satoru glided inside, sighing dreamily as he closed the door behind him. His eyes were glued to his phone and a goofy grin was plastered to his face while his fingers flew across the screen. When he finally looked up, he pressed his phone to his chest and sighed again.

“Sugu, I think I’ve met the one.” He announced, making his way over to the couch and flopping down with another loud blissful sigh.

“Please don’t tell me it’s y/n.” Suguru grumbled.

“She’s perfect, man. I don’t know why you hate her so much.” Satoru went on.

“Possibly the fact that she’s the worst person I’ve ever met in my entire life.”

Satoru sat up on the couch, stretching his long legs out in front of him. “No, she’s great. We’ve been talking since you took off earlier. What was up with that, by the way? You missed the most amazing thing.” Suguru watched Satoru’s face light up as he filled him in on the details. Even with those dark sunglasses on, Suguru could see how excited Satoru was. He had never seen Satoru gush over a girl before. Were you really that special?

Yes.

Suguru ignored that thought.

“So, she agreed to come over for our date. She’ll be here tonight for dinner. It’s cool if you’re around obviously, but try to be nice dude. I think I love this girl already.”

Suguru resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He didn’t even know you. But did Suguru really know you either?

“She’s so funny and cute and she has the tightest ass I’ve ever seen. You should’ve stuck around to watch it bounce in those little shorts she was jogging around in.” Satoru chuckled to himself, no doubt playing the memory over in his head. He continued. “I don’t know what it is about her, man. The second I laid eyes on her I just knew I had to have her.”

Suguru’s nostrils flared as he tried to quietly steady his breathing. He felt like he was running again. What was this? His heart was pounding so hard in his chest, he thought he was going to die. He took a deep breath and exhaled, ignoring the familiar feeling creeping back up on him. God, he was hoping to end this conversation soon.

Satoru droned on. “For once I’m not rushing to fuck or anything. I want to impress this girl. You know, do all the sappy and romantic shit I guess. But…when I do get her in my bed Sugu, I swear I’m gonna-“

The loud crackle of Suguru’s water bottle being crushed in his hand broke through the room’s atmosphere. Satoru raised an eyebrow, pulling his glasses off and looking Suguru up and down. “You good, man?” He asked suspiciously. Suguru forced a smile, gritting his teeth before replying.

“I’m perfect. I’m gonna shower and head out to class. Good luck on your date with that demon tonight. I’ll probably be home late, so don’t worry about me interrupting.”

Satoru didn’t reply, already back on his phone probably texting you. Suguru tossed his totally demolished water bottle into the trash and headed for his room, shutting the door quietly behind him. That painful twist was back.

[yesimwriting]

Crossing lines

General Kirigan/the darkling x reader

Summary: This was requested by my friend @vvsdiamond28 who also writes and has a really good kirigan x reader story up right now! The request was basically for a fic in which the reader is out wandering at night and runs into kirigan while he’s in the banya and then they get to talking and some other stuff before he admits to only trusting the reader and giving her his real name. This gets kinda steamy bc of the request and bc the story called for it lol but it’s not full smut bc i decided that it would be better to do that as a part 2 so that i could add some jealousy tension haha

a/n i think im back?? Ive been working on requests a lot and ive really enjoyed writing regularly again. A small side note, after rewatching revenge of the sith im kinda in the mood to try writing an anakin fic 😭 pls he was my OG fictional crush,, so either send help or a request for him or something, Anyways,, back to this fic--ahh i had fun writing it but i still feel awkward writing steamier stuff so be nice!! 

-- 

Those that wander in the night, lost in uneasy thought--there’s probably a lot that can be said about them. But I can’t think of anything to be said about me. Nothing good comes from walking around a place full of powerful and tense people in the middle of the night. It wouldn’t take much effort to interpret my actions as suspicious, and yet I continue forward. I’m an idiot--just because I can’t sleep doesn’t mean I have to wander around campgrounds. My presence is barely tolerated here, I shouldn’t try backstroking in waters I can barely tread. 

But still, I walk, eyes more fixated on the open night sky than anything else. The moon is as full as an overflowing glass, the stars twinkling as if desperate to compete with a light it will never be able to duplicate. I sigh, pressing my lips together. Maybe the stars and I have more in common than I thought. Normally, that would be a good thing. 

Letting out a weary breath, I continue forward, away from the relative safety of the main tents. I’m still on the grounds, I’m approaching the border where the tents of higher ranking officials are. That should make me more nervous, but if anything it almost eases me slightly. 

General Kirigan is not the type to be friendly, and yet our interactions have always been laced with a touch of intimacy I can’t quite explain. We’ve been alone together more and more frequently, and I think that’s how I like him best. It’s strange, but when we’re alone some of his sharpness dulls, leaving space for something I might consider humor or actual personality on anyone else. He probably speaks to many girls like that when they’re alone together--a fact I have to fight to remind myself of--but it’s the closest thing to friendship I have here. Maybe it’s foolish to hold onto that, but I can’t bring myself to release my grip on those sentiments. At least not yet, when the kind moments are still rare and fleeting and no line has been crossed. 

The danger, however, comes from the prospect of not recognizing lines before they’re crossed. Even now, as I walk aimlessly in the night, pacing in hopes of exhausting my thoughts, I’m crossing lines in a much more literal way and even these are ill defined. I must be in new territory now, and even that I can only vaguely recognize because of the strangely humid scent that surrounds this area of the grounds. 

I’m near the banya. I didn’t intend to wander here, but the thought of splashing water on my face is too tempting to pass up on. I move closer, finding a sense of peace in having some direction, even in a small way. 

When the promise of water is only steps away, I begin to regret everything. There’s a figure in the bath. I freeze, ready to attempt to shrink away in hopes of disappearing before I’m caught. This could easily turn extremely awkward even though I technically haven’t done anything. Most people don’t bathe at this hour. Who bathes this late at night? 

I keep my eyes on the individual, trying to make out who they are and how aware they are of their surroundings in the dim light. Pale skin, dark hair--unbelievably attractive torso. My eyes linger there longer than they should. I force my gaze upwards, towards their face as if that can erase my ogling. Embarrassment leaves my face burning--I’m not the ‘ogling’ type, and this person doesn’t even know I’m here. I keep my eyes on them as I step back, taking in unaware features as best I can in the dark. 

I know them--I--Saints, it’s Kirigan. 

Fantastic. Of course he has to be even more impossibly attractive while shirtless and wet. I turn my head upwards sharply, more desperate to not be caught than ever. I would never, ever recover from being caught. Whether he’d tease me or be angry with me, I don’t know. I also don’t know which option I’d prefer. 

I step back again, my gait wider due to my urgency. Snap. The sound of both a twig and my chance of a stealthy escape being shattered. I cringe, craning my neck to the left in a desperate attempt to make it clear that I wasn’t watching him. I take another desperate step, ready to duck behind a nearby tree. Maybe he hasn’t seen me--maybe he’s distracted and assumed that some kind of rabbit or something passed by. He may not actively dislike me, but I’m not sure any semblance of favor he may have for me extends to this situation.

“Y/n.” His tone reveals nothing but his level of certainty. Ignoring him will only make me seem guilty. 

I pause, keeping my gaze off of him. “Yes.” It wasn’t really a question, and yet I still answer it like one. “I was--I couldn’t sleep so I thought I’d get some air, and I was walking kind of aimlessly and I ended up here and I didn’t think anyone would be here.” Why do I feel like I’m making this situation worse? “I’m sorry--I’m gonna--I’m going to go now.” This is the kind of embarrassing moment that will come back to me when I’m trying to fall asleep at night. I know it.

“You know the polite thing to do after intruding is to make eye contact.” 

I don’t think my face has ever felt this warm before. At least he doesn’t sound angry, but his voice doesn’t reveal that much. I raise my gaze carefully, turning my head slowly. “I didn’t mean,” I exhale slowly, “It wasn’t my intention to intrude.” 

He straightens slightly at my words, exposing more of his chest. I stay still, eyes trained on his to avoid an accidental lapse. “You could make it up to me by offering conversation.” Kirigan’s tone is deliberate, his words measured and calm. I don’t speak, feeling like I’m being presented a test I don’t understand, but most of our conversations leave me feeling like that. “Only if you’re comfortable.” 

And just like that, I’m backed into a corner. A challenge. To deny him now would be to expose the effect he has on me. My chin raises a fraction of an inch as I take in that assured half-smirk. “Why wouldn’t I be comfortable?” 

Kirigan arches a dark brow, assessing my response. “Then sit,” his voice has not changed, “You want air and I want company.” 

I don’t think anyone that looks as good as he does shirtless has ever had trouble finding company, especially with the smooth way he speaks. Despite this, I step forward to accept his challenge without calling him out on his coyness. Each step is the crossing of another invisible line until I’m near the water’s edge. I make sure to keep my nightgown at a respectable length as I sit down. 

I make a point of extending my legs towards the water while leaning back so that I can’t be easily accused of being a coward. “I feel the need to warn you that I might not make particularly interesting company.”

He angles his head to the side slightly, drawing attention to his jawline and neck. I force my stare to focus on the water. “I’ve never found you uninteresting.” 

There’s something resigned in the way he says this. On instinct, I look up, taking in the slight softening of his features. The release of his usual sternness only adds to his beauty, a fact that I’m already resenting. 

“You may be the only one.” It’s not meant to be a deprecating comment, but I’m not sure my partial laugh softens my bitterness. I hope it does--I’d rather his interest than the interest of my entire unit. 

Kirigan shifts forward, the water moving with him. “Do you think that any coldness you’re experiencing has to do with you?” 

The question has me drawing my eyebrows together. What else could it be? I shrug, “I’ve considered it.” 

He nods once, eyes hardening slightly. “Do you always have trouble sleeping?” 

The personalness of the question shouldn’t surprise me as much as it does. Kirigan seems to only understand boundaries when he’s the one setting them. “Not really.” A partial lie--this time I’m glad I can’t quite bring myself to look at him. “It’s not uncommon for me, but it’s not something I deal with every night.” 

I risk shifting my eyeline when I hear the sound of water moving. Kirigan’s now resting an arm on the rim of the pool, wet skin dangerously close to my ankle and lower calf. “It’s not always easy,” his voice is low now, “Being alone with your thoughts.” 

That’s not the kind of reply I’d expect from him. I blink twice before turning to study his expression. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him seem so tired--so weary and human and in need of something. The line between his eyebrows and the far off quality of his eyes leave me with the strong desire to give whatever it is he needs to him. The urge to reach out, to touch him in hopes of breaking him free from his odd trance leaves my stomach knotted. That line is too clear to cross so recklessly.

I need to chase away the serious atmosphere he’s created. “Is that why you bathe so late at night?” I let myself smile, “To avoid thoughts?” 

“I like the peace of it.” Something akin to amusement touches his words. “And for the record, little dove,” the nickname is pointed and earns him an eyeroll, “The warm water doesn’t exactly chase away thoughts so much as encourages others.” He pauses. “You understand, considering you can barely look at me.”

This is the most embarrassing thing to have ever happened. The suggestive jilt to his words has to be intentional. Damn him. I turn my head, forcing myself to meet his gaze. “I can look at you just fine.” 

“And if I were a Heartrender and could hear your heartbeat your pulse would be normal?” The question is teasing, a small smile pulling at his lips. 

The warmth in my face increases, spreading down my neck. Kirigan’s expression remains smug. “You’re not as funny as you think you are.” 

“No?” He leans forward, angling his head so close to me I can faintly feel the warmth of his breath on my lower calf. “I find myself amusing.” 

At least being around him like this is getting easier. I open my mouth, ready to provide some sarcastic comment I haven’t thought out yet. My mouth clamps shut on instinct when I feel his touch on my ankle. The faint contact quickly grows, his fingers brushing up my ankle and calf, leaving drops of cool water across my skin.

“What are you doing?” That’s a--a fair question, right? I’m not sure, rational thought slipping from me more and more with each passing second. 

“Nothing, really,” his reply is quick. “Nervous?” 

There is no way he doesn’t know what he’s doing. I roll my eyes, fighting against my instinctual fluster. “No,” a full lie, “You’re just getting me wet.” 

“Barely.” When he’s not busy being brooding he’s not much better than an irritating child. He retracts his hand slowly, fingers grazing my skin slowly as he submerges his hand beneath the water. The loss of contact should feel like a victory. It doesn’t. “Y/n,” he shifts closer, back straightening.

There’s an odd seriousness to his demeanor that almost leaves me reeling. “Yes?” 

He beckons me forward. I hesitate, but comply, letting myself shift closer to the water’s edge. Kirgan’s lips part, but no words leave him before he moves his arm, purposefully splashing water over my thighs and bottom of my nightgown. I let out an instinctively annoyed sound. “That is getting you wet.” 

“Kirigan!” My tone is as menacing as I can make it, but he continues to grin. There’s such a lightness to the look I almost forget to be annoyed. Almost. “I should tell the entire Second Army how much of a child you are.” 

My threat does nothing, his smile softening without fading. “They fear me too much for your stories to make a difference.” He says this flatly. “All of them except you.” 

I don’t know if I’m supposed to make something of that comment. A brief moment passes in which I think his eyes come close to softening. Maybe that’s a side effect of seeing the world as you want. Wait...what do I want? Him? No, no, I can’t. 

Okay, he’s objectively attractive and sometimes I think I may see more depth in him than he wants to be capable of. But that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to want anything with him. Even if he was trustworthy enough for me to be with him in any capacity...even casually, it could never happen. Nothing good could come from having relations with the highest ranked general and I doubt he’d ever want me like that. He likes to fluster people and I’m an easy target. I just accept it because being some level of entertainment to him is better than being nothing to everyone. 

“I don’t think there’s much point in fear.” It feels like a fair answer. The fairest answer I can manage, anyways. 

He sighs, the sound heavy. His hand stretches forward cautiously. I watch him and make no attempt to stop him from touching my lower calf. His fingers trace absentmindedly across the skin. “Of course you’d think that.” 

Again, I don’t know what to make of his words. Or his actions. He couldn’t find anything wrong with me just slightly adjusting my position. It’d be a polite way to remind us both of the natural order of things. But then again, someone like him is allowed to be mad about anything. And I’m not sure I want to remind us of our place. 

Actually, I’m completely sure that I want the opposite of that. But admitting that to myself is enough of a risk. I’ve already crossed thousands of tiny lines and what I want will require us to cross a thousand more. 

“I’m a little surprised you’re not reminding me how foolish a notion like that can be.” 

He lets out a tiny breath as he shifts even closer to me. “Maybe I’m enjoying your foolishness.” 

“I’m not sure if I should take that as a compliment or the opposite.” 

The slightest hint of a smile is visible to me beneath the moon’s glow. There’s something about darkness that adds beauty to things. I wait for him to reply, but instead of speaking his  hand moves further up my leg. I struggle to hide my reaction to his long fingers trailing up my skin.

He’s touched me before, sure. Tiny moments in which he’d push a strand of hair out of my face or wipe at a bit of dirt on my cheekbone. More recently, he had gripped my hip firmly to guide me through a crowd of soldiers. He had been in a hurry, stealing me from a conversation with the only member of my unit that’s been somewhat friendly to me. It wasn’t serious--he had just been rushing me because he only had a minute between meetings and apparently he had too long of a day to not take a moment to speak with me. 

“Are you alright, Dovey?” Normally, the nickname and all of its variations earns him an eyeroll. But everything is a lot less humorous with his hand half up my lower leg, leaving a trail of cool water wherever he touches. 

His fingers press more firmly into my skin. “Yes, I’m fine--it’s just late.” 

“Hm…” Kirigan breathes before tilting his head slightly. “You’re warm.” I stay silent as his hand shifts slightly. “Perhaps too warm.” 

If I’m hot that has absolutely nothing to do with fever. “I’m fine, General, I promise.” 

“Come closer,” he says, “It’ll take me no time to check.” 

...A little too convenient. My nightgown is still embarrassingly damp from the last time I eased tonight. “Please tell me you don’t find me that naive.” 

“Naive? No.” He lifts his hand slightly. “Warm? Yes.” I still don’t trust him. “I’m not going to do anything. I promise.” 

His eyes are dark and the limited lighting of the moon doesn’t offer me much in my analysis, but what I can see makes him seem genuine. “Why do I feel like that’s not the first time you’ve had to say that?” Despite my comment, I move towards him. 

The back of Kirigan’s palm is pressed to my forehead for less than a second. He brushes his hand down the side of my temple, rotating his wrist so that his fingertips can touch my cheek. His hand then continues to move down my jawline and then my neck...and then finally trails down my collarbone. I bite my tongue to avoid exhaling audibly at the contact. 

“Warm,” he concludes with a tsk, and yet he doesn’t withdraw his hand. “Though that could just have to do with the climate.” His thumb slips beneath the sleeve of my nightgown. “Perhaps you could benefit from joining me.” 

I bite my tongue to avoid letting out a surprised, embarrassingly enthusiastic squeak. I don’t know what’s gotten into him...maybe it’s the night air and the prospect of being fully alone. I should be strong enough to break whatever spell he’s starting to place on me. But I’m not. I’m really, really not. 

He pulls on the sleeve of my nightgown slightly. “I’m…” 

“Unless you’re nervous?” Another damn challenge. To shy away from this would be to expose myself. He tugs on the sleeve a little more assuredly, exposing my shoulder to the humid night. “Do I make you nervous?” 

His voice comes out a shallow rasp. I feel it straight in my core. “...Not more than you should.” 

“More than I should?” 

Ugh--too honest. I let myself get distracted. It shouldn’t be too difficult to explain what I meant. He knows he’s feared. He wants to be feared. “I’m sure we’re both aware that there are a fair amount of cautionary tales revolving around you.” 

His hand falls next to my lap. Oh? I didn’t expect to miss the contact between us so much. His expression seems to have fallen slightly as well. Was it my response to his question? It felt fair and straightforward without being too blunt. “And you believe every cautionary tale you hear?” 

There’s something stiff about the way he asks the question. His moodiness is making me miss his touchiness even more. At least then I didn’t have to feel like I made a mistake. Did I say something wrong? “Should I?”

“It depends on whether or not you plan on being brave.” 

“I told you...I don’t see much point in fear.” 

“And yet you’re still there.” A bit of humor returns to his voice. “Why is that?” 

Rolling my eyes, I shift forward, letting my legs dip into the water. This is as far as I should let this go. I’ve already lost too much more control. “Better?” He’s strangely tense again, a hint of something bitter playing at the smug look he tries for. “You alright?”

“Of course you’d ask me that.” He says this with a tired sigh. “You can never make things easy.” 

“I don’t understand.” 

He shifts backwards slightly. I can feel the distance between us like I’d feel a pebble in my shoe. “Do you believe all the stories about me?” 

Is he still bothered by that? “I didn’t mean it as literally as you’re taking it. All I meant is that people are intimidated by you, but that’s not a bad thing. It’s the way things have to be, you’re the only Shadow Summoner in existence and the army needs you to be intimidating so that they can act on your guidance.”

“The way things have to be,” he echoes, his voice strangely weighted. “There’s a specific kind of loneliness that comes with being feared by everyone.” 

Oh--I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him feel defeated like that. I reach for his hand without thinking, pulling his fingers towards my lap. “I don’t--I’m not scared of you.” It’s a weak attempt to comfort him, but it’s the only one I can think of. “That probably doesn’t mean anything, but I--” 

His hand turns in my lap, squeezing the exposed part of my thigh. “It means something.” Kirigan’s voice has hardened in a different way. “You’re the only person I’m certain of.” 

Everything in me seems to tighten at that. At the implication of something so personal from someone so closed off. “Kirigan, you don’t have to be as alone as you feel. You talk to me all the time and you do so in a way that makes it easy to forget the cautionary tales.” His hand moves further up my thigh. I fight as I try to remember our usual dynamic. “You’re the only one that talks to me like that.” 

“Have you ever considered that maybe the others refuse to take to you because of the favor I’ve shown you? The instinct to stay away from me is strong enough to extend to those around me.” Kirigan’s hand moves higher up my thigh. “To be near me is to involve solitude.” 

“I don’t care.” The answer leaves me too quickly. “Being near you is worth it.” 

He leans closer before resting his chin on my knee with no hesitation. “Careful, you don’t understand the line you tread.” Kirigan places his hand more firmly between my thighs. “Or perhaps you do...perhaps you know what you want to cross.” 

This time I can’t help the airy sigh that leaves me. Kirigan pushes against my thigh slightly, separating my legs. I feel his breath on my inner thigh before I know what’s going on. I can’t move, I can’t think, I can’t even breathe. That inability to do anything but feel my heart pound against my chest only worsens as I feel his lips press into the inside of my thigh. His lips trail up my skin before his teeth gently sink into the top of my thigh. 

“Is the line you want to cross?” He breathes the question so softly I feel like I’m being coddled. Everything in me feels too hot to think of any kind of coherent response. Kirigan uses his free hand to pull the fabric of my nightgown as high up my thighs as he can from his position below me. “Or maybe this is the line you want to cross?” Kirigan pulls me forward so suddenly I let out a tiny gasp. I’m not fully on the edge of the banya. “Or perhaps this one?” He kisses the skin of my inner thigh gently. Each time I exhale too loudly, his teeth graze my skin. He gets harsher with each passing second. “Lay down.” 

My body listens to him on instinct. How is this happening? How am I this powerless to fight against something that’s so clearly wrong? The sound of water shifting causes my entire body to tense. He’s pulled himself out of the water. Kirigan moves above me instantly, water dripping from his toned chest and dark hair and onto my still damp nightgown. 

Before I can speak, he’s on me completely, his lips pressing against my jaw. He kisses down my neck, his teeth grazing against my skin sporadically. He pulls away from me by tracing his tongue across my collar bone. I let out something dangerously close to a moan. “Such pretty, little sounds.” 

“Kirigan--” 

“The only name I want you to hear from your lips is the only name that I’ve not given myself. The only name that holds meaning to me.” 

His lips graze where my skin meets the hem of my now soaked through nightgown. I’m not sure the poor lighting is offering me enough coverage now. There’s no way the thin fabric leaves much to the imagination while being this wet. He kisses up my chest and neck until his lips reach the shell of my ear. 

“Aleksander.” The name is grace in the form of a breath so soft it’s more like I’m feeling the name than actually hearing it. 

He presses his lips against the spot on my neck directly beneath my ear. I exhale into the contact. “Aleksander.” As I test his true name on my tongue, his teeth dig into my skin much more harshly than before. 

I let out a partial squeak at the sudden shift in pace as his hands grip my waist. “Say it again. Say my name again.”

He traces his tongue gingerly over the skin he just aggravated with his teeth before I can speak. The soothing sensation is so much I can barely find my voice. “Aleksander.” 

His hand bunches the bottom of my nightgown, raising the fabric to my hips. “...Say it just like that.” Kirgan’s rough hand slips between the bone of my hip and the fabric of my hip. “Like I’m the only one that knows you like this.”

“Aleksander.” I breathe as he traces invisible patterns into my skin with his lips. “Aleksander.” Each use of his name earns me extra attention--a stronger hold on my hip, a more adamant nip at the base of my neck. I feel my need for him so heavily I swear it’s leaked into my bones. “Aleksander.”

When he pulls away, I fight the urge to whine. The night is still humid, but with the absence of his touch I feel like I’m shivering. He regards me silently for a long moment before shifting his weight again. I feel my heart stall in my chest as his hand softly brushes a strand of hair out of my face. He lets his hand linger there, at the apple of my cheek. The entire world seems to stall as he leans down, his hand cupping the side of my face as his mouth inches closer to mine. 

“I can feel the fluttering of your heart.” 

Any poor defense dies in my throat as his lips meet mine. He gives me no time to think about what’s happening as he presses into me even harder. Kirigan holds my face as his teeth graze against my bottom lip. My mouth opens slightly in surprise, giving him the opportunity he needs to slip his tongue into my mouth. His tongue slowly brushes against mine, coaxing me into total, delirious, compliance. When he starts to pull away, I react, my hands flying forward to grab his hair. He lets me get away with tugging him towards me, prolonging the kiss as he bites my bottom lip. 

One of his hands leaves my face and travels up the hands holding onto his hair. He pulls me off of him easily, pinning both of my wrists above my head with one hand. “Easy,” Kirigan warns, “You’ve been such a good girl, let’s not ruin it before we’ve started.” 

A tiny sigh leaves me. I can feel the pride he takes in that as his hand trails further down my body. His fingers ghost along the hem of my underwear teasingly. 

“Is someone there?” I’ve never damned the voice of a stranger more. 

Panic and dread roll in my stomach. I’m going to get caught like this, with my nightgown bunched at my hips beneath the General Kirigan. An unclothed, wet, General Kirigan. “I’m bathing.” 

Okay...good...Aleksander spoke. Anyone with common sense would run at the thought of invading on Kirgan’s privacy. It’s a good thing that the soldier had the sense to linger behind a thicket of bushes. “Pardon General, but there’s been a crucial development. A new strategy should be thought of as soon as possible.” 

No. No. The thought of losing contact so entirely, of having a moment that should have never happened be ripped from me before it’s even really happened is overwhelming. I feel my lips pull into a pout. Kirigan’s hand adjusts on me, his thumb pressing teasingly over where I’m neediest. I bite my tongue to avoid making an inappropriate noise. 

“Five minutes--I’ll be in the strategy tent in five minutes.” 

“I’ll tell the others, General.”

Great. I hear the stranger disappear, his feet crushing twigs and grass as he leaves us. Aleksander’s attention returns to me quickly. Disappointment swells in my chest as I take in the solemn look that crosses his features. His hand moves to my chin quickly before pulling me into another deep kiss. It’s too short lived. 

“I have to go.” 

Frowning, I lift my hand to trace my fingers up his arm. It’s softer than I should allow myself to be, but it doesn’t really matter anymore. Not when this is probably never going to happen again. “Do you?” I mumble to myself, half joking.

He sighs once, his thumb brushing against my cheek. “No pouting.” 

Now that whatever little bubble we were in has popped, I’m capable of normal feelings. Including shame. “I am n--” 

“Easy, little dove, I’ll remember all of this when I find you again.” 

This...this is going to happen again? “You’re going to find me?” 

“I haven’t yet heard your voice crack on my name as I undo you.” He punctuates the promise with a kiss to my jaw. “Again.” Another kiss. “And again.” Another brush of his lips as he finally pulls away. “And again.” 

My breath catches itself in my throat as he moves off of me entirely. Damn whatever change in the war that’s pulled him away from me so suddenly. I sit up as he stands. I’m not sure where to look now that he’s not in close enough proximity to cloud my thoughts. I should leave as he dresses, but I can’t quite bring myself to. It doesn’t feel safe, not when the man that interrupted us could reappear at any moment. Not when I want to hold onto his presence like this as long as possible. 

 He squeezes my shoulder warmly as he passes before bending down to press one more kiss next to where his hand is. 

“Soon,” he promises again. 

--

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