#which is really why at this point in time I have to kind of nudge to people that if he appears obsessive about your character
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muu-kun · 2 years ago
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muu, why did you turn out this way.
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ellecdc · 3 months ago
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How about a fic where Remus falls for reader who is Sirius’ sister? If Sirius freaks out with Regulus and James, just imagine how protective he would be with a sister! Specially if she is sweet and kind (totally opposite of him and Regulus)
will I ever make a sibling fic that isn't chaotic? no, likely not. also, I didn't exactly make her the opposite of Sirius and Regulus but it could be argued that she's better than them anyways. ALSO, I've always refrained from reader-inserts with Black!sister reader simply because I see her as Reggie's twin who looks the way he does, and also can't get beyond the fact that she would have a celestial name SO, in any Black!sister fics going forward, please note that her middle name will have been Soleil which is French for sun, and the boys call her Sunny as a nickname <3
Remus Lupin x Black!sister reader who he has fallen head over heels for [1.5k words]
CW: siblings, threats of murder
Most boys at some point in their lives will be asked the following question:
Are you a mummy’s boy, or a daddy’s boy?
If a boy wasn’t asked such a question, it was likely because the answer was painfully obvious.
“Little Lucius Malfoy is such a daddy’s boy.”
“That James Potter, such a mama’s boy”.
“Oh, sweet Peter Pettigrew, he has always been a mummy’s boy.”
Since the answer was so painfully obvious, neither Sirius Orion Black or Regulus Arcturus Black had ever been asked this question. For them, the answer was simple:
They were their sister’s boy’s.
It was this fact that made Remus Lupin’s current predicament so bloody difficult. 
“Where is she!?” Regulus barked as he stormed over to the Gryffindor table where Sirius was sitting beside James across from Remus and Peter.
“Goodmorning, Reggie.” Sirius offered instead of answering his brother.
“For Sala- hi, Sirius. Where is she?”
“Where is who?” 
“Your sister.” Regulus spat, causing Sirius’ brows to furrow as he chanced a look over his shoulder at his brother. 
“How is she my sister? She’s your twin.”
“Nevermind that, do you know where she is?” Regulus muttered.
Sirius sighed and stood from his seat to scan the Great Hall. 
“Nope.” He offered with a pop of the p before returning to his breakfast.
“I’m going to avada that meddling witch!” Regulus hissed as he stormed off; Remus, James, and Peter all watching after him as Sirius continued happily with his toast.
“Are….you not worried about her?” Peter asked cautiously then.
“Not really.” Sirius responded quickly. 
James let out a breath at that and shook his head in disbelief. “Siblings are weird, mate.”
“Thanks, Siri.” You chimed as your head popped up between James and Sirius; the former shrieking not unlike a displeased mandrake plant as he clutched at his chest. 
Neither you nor Sirius paid him any mind as Sirius nudged his plate closer to you so you could pick from it. 
“What’d you do now?” Sirius asked.
“I simply told one of Reg’s admirers that he was already seeing someone; I hardly see what all the fuss is about.” You offered simply, causing Sirius to look at you in bemusement and mutter “Reg is seeing someone?” at the same time James looked at you in horror and hissed “Reg has an admirer!?” 
You simply smirked and looked at Remus who was sitting across from you and shot him a wink.
He hoped to all get out that no one noticed the heat radiating in his cheeks as he smiled nervously down at his plate, though he was relatively certain he could feel a set of spectacled eyes burning a hole into the side of his head. 
“Wait, why do you look like that?” Sirius asked then, causing the table to look at him to see he was surveying your form.
“Like what?” You asked him slowly, looking down at your uniform as if to see what Sirius could possibly be talking about. 
“You look…like…nice.” Sirius muttered as if that was a particularly bad thing.
“I always look nice.” You argued then.
“That’s not true, you usually just look fine.”
“You’re such a git.” You spat, taking the piece of toast he had in his hand and taking a bite of it.
“Doesn’t she just usually only look fine?” Sirius asked then, and Remus was horrified to see he was looking at him. 
“Me?”
Sirius nodded impatiently as if saying “yeah? What about it?”
“Why are you asking me?” Remus asked somewhat shrilly. 
“You’re objective.”
“And Peter and James aren’t?”
Sirius huffed as he kicked Remus in the shin under the table. “Would you just answer the sodding question?”
“I…well,” and Remus looked at you - you, who always looked nothing short of lovely and radiant and dauntingly perfect in every way, and today had been no exception. But he couldn’t very well say that. “She…she looks fine, yeah.”
Sirius’ brows furrowed further as he turned back to look at you, and Remus tried to pretend he didn’t notice a brief look a hurt cross your features. “You do, though. Look lovely today, that is.” He added awkwardly, simply receiving a half-smile in response. 
“Sunny!” Regulus barked then; apparently having found his way back to the Great Hall in his search for you.
“Oh, Merlin and Morgana.” You grumbled as your head fell back in exasperation.
“What did you tell him?”
“Who?” Sirius and James parroted. 
“Sunny.” Regulus repeated, his gaze never moving from you as he sidled up behind you. “What did you tell him?”
“Oh, stop with the theatrics, Regulus; you’re embarrassing yourself.” You drawled, sounding like a true upper-classman as you refused to look at your twin. 
“What did you tell Fenwick?” He gritted out slowly in a way Remus was sure would make a lesser man cower, but you simply rolled your eyes at him. 
“I simply told him that he was grasping at billywigs because you were already seeing someone.” 
Regulus held your gaze as you raised your eyebrow at him. “That’s it?”
“That’s it.” You hissed, completely unimpressed. 
“Who in the hells are you seeing?” Sirius asked then, causing the two of you to look over at him.
“Nevermind, Siri.” You responded in a bored tone around another bite of his toast.
“I will too mind, thank you very much! Who is my baby brother seeing!?”
“Oh relax, Sirius, there’s no need to call the DMLE; it’s not like Sunny’s seeing anyone.” He chuckled, causing Sirius to snort in laughter.
“That’s true.”
You made a disbelieving sound as you looked between your two brothers. “What in Merlin’s name is that supposed to mean?!”
“That means, my dear baby sister,” Sirius responded curtly as he yanked his toast back from you, “that you must never date, otherwise your big brother will end up in Azkaban.” 
“Oh give us a little credit, Sirius; we’d get away with it.” Regulus countered. 
“Why!?” You beseeched. 
“No one is good enough for you, obviously.” Sirius responded simply, as if you were quite ridiculous for even needing to ask. 
“And anyone who thinks otherwise will end up dead.” Regulus continued earnestly, causing James to bark a laugh.
“Don’t worry Moons, Pete and I will make sure your funeral is nice.” He said as he brought another spoon of cereal to his mouth.
Remus felt all blood drain from his face as everyone turned to look at him.
Regulus stared at him in a confused sort of horror, Peter looked at him with a sympathetically worried expression, Sirius didn’t look exactly horrified or disgusted as Remus had thought he would, but he definitely looked disturbed to some level, and you were looking at him with what he thought (and certainly hoped) was hopeful surprise.
James looked up at the silence to see everyone staring at Remus, whilst Remus just stared at him in betrayal.
“James!?” Remus whisper shouted; his voice having apparently run off along with his bollocks. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Regulus finally asked then, staring daggers at Remus as Sirius raised his hand slightly as if warning Regulus off of his best friend, though never removing his own scrutinising gaze from Remus. 
“James, what’d you mean by that?” Sirius asked James - eyes still glued to Remus.
“I, well, erm. I’m actually, not entirely sure? I just…well…”
“Do you fancy her, Moony?” Sirius whispered as if it was some horrid joke and so completely unfathomable that Remus could possibly find you as enchanting as he admittedly did. 
No, he wanted to say, of course not, Pads. That’s your baby sister, I’d never fall so head-over-heels for the sister of my best friend, that’s absurd. 
But that wouldn’t be true.
And he’d already been outed. 
His gaze moved to you and offered what he hoped was an apologetic smile before opening his mouth to respond. 
“Regulus is shagging James!” You blurted then, causing James to flinch so violently that his knees hit the bottom of the table top, and Regulus deflated severely from where he’d been staring down Remus like some well-trained guard-dragon. 
“Are you fucking kidding me!?” Sirius shrieked then, turning to point his glare at someone other than Remus, finally.
Remus had been so caught up in the verbal volleying taking place between Sirius, Regulus, and James that he hadn’t noticed you had disappeared from your spot beside Sirius until you popped back up beside him and were encouraging him up by the sleeve of his uniform jumper.
And you looked so sweet and so lovely and so hopeful and so mischievous and Remus really was helpless in the pull you had on him, which saw him rushing out of the Great Hall with your hand in his as you dragged him away from your brothers and laughing all the while. 
So yeah, this made Remus Lupin’s current predicament incredibly bloody difficult.
Because if Sirius and Regulus were sister’s boys, you were your brothers’ girl.
And that made Remus Lupin a dead man walking.
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parfaitblogs · 5 months ago
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peace ❀ s. reid x reader
in which you self isolate, and spencer knows better than to let it get too bad. 
pairing: spencer reid x reader genre: hurt/comfort tags: established relationship. suicide ideation? ("i want it to end"). depression. lots of stuff that coincides with that. brief mention of reader not eating/having no food. please be aware of your triggers. i think i mention reader as a girl somewhere? word count: 1.9k a/n: i finished this then relistened to peace (taylor swift) which was the og inspo for this, and added a section in the middle so if it feels weird its because i failed at integrating it! this was supposed to be out two days ago. all my relationship insecurities in a fic. lol how embarrassing here's my heart tumblr dot com!! anyways enjoy ily all
also posted here on my ao3 !
Three consistent raps against your front door was the only sound that got you up that day, pyjamas that you had not shed from your body in a week hanging off a frame that could probably be described as lifeless — with the nearly dead-looking face to match.
In fact, the only thing to prove you were still a living human being aside from your movement, was the pink hue around your eyes, on your nose, and above your lips, indicating how much you had cried recently. 
Usually, it isn't this bad. You just need a day or two of rotting in your apartment and doing nothing but scrolling on your phone until it died, staring at the wall, or — on the better days — watching reruns of a 90s sitcom that you don't really watch. 
But it was exceptionally bad this time around, for some odd reason, and not one part of you actually wanted to get up and out of bed for long enough to be productive about your day. Your phone had died again, after charging it two days ago, which meant you were on day six of no communication with anybody. Which might partly be why it was so bad now. 
You had a blanket wrapped around your body, dragging against the floor as you wiped your eyes and let out a small sigh, unlocking your front door and opening it, completely unsurprised by the person standing on the other side. 
He was the only one who ever paid enough attention to your disappearing act when you were like this. 
His eyes softened at the sight of you — which is kind of amusing, considering you thought you looked like death reincarnate currently. 
Neither of you said anything as you stepped aside to allow him in, the door clicking shut behind him as he placed down the leather bag he had slung over his body, turning back to you as he finally allowed the frown to appear — one you knew he would've had the entire way here.
"Have you eaten today?" was the first thing to break the silence — the question coming out so gentle you were sure you'd break down again at some point in the next few seconds. 
You wordlessly shook your head, and he nodded his own, saying nothing else as he walked into your kitchen, knowing you'd trail behind him no matter what. 
He opened your fridge first, before closing it when he was greeted with the alarming sight of nothing. Doing the same with your pantry, at which he turned around to look at you.
"Angel, you have no food," he said. And while it held no malice in the tone of his voice, you could tell he was slightly annoyed at the fact. Your heart ached. 
"I know. I'm sorry," you mumbled, and his eyebrows creased inwards. 
He didn't mention your apology — arguing with you about your vast use of 'sorry's' is futile. "Do you want a pizza?" he asked instead, and even though you, mentally, did not, you knew he wasn't actually asking. So you only nodded your head, and found a place at your countertop, the blanket falling from your body and pooling to the ground in a heap.
He ordered a pizza, and then he was nudging your knees apart, standing between them while you stayed sat on a stool, his chin atop your head, that was buried into his chest. 
And he said nothing, as he held you like that until the pizza arrived. And then he ensured you had at least eaten two slices, the remainders going in your fridge for the next meal you needed to eat. 
He was so kind to you, with his every movement, as he dragged you into the bathroom to help you shower. 
It was heartbreaking, the love you could see in his eyes. The tenderness in every stroke of his fingers against your scalp as he washed your hair, the softness in his touch as he did the same to your body. He gently dried you, told you to stay there, disappeared, and returned with one of his many t-shirts left in your apartment drawers. 
That was when you cracked. When he pulled the shirt over your head, that smelled so painfully Spencer and you. The mix of his clean scent and your own laundry detergent that you were so accustomed to, triggering something in you.
So, you crumpled to the floor of your bathroom, and he followed soon after, his arms wrapped around your body once more, firm enough to keep you still as you sobbed into his chest. 
You weren't sure how long you stayed like that for. Long enough for your head to hurt, and your eyes to sting, and hideous snot bubbles to stain his cardigan. 
When your sobs subsided, he spoke. 
"You wanna talk about it?" he said, quietly, and you shook your head. 
"Don't know what to talk about," you mumbled, and he knew that all too well.
He nodded his own head. "Did something happen?"
"Lots of little things."
"Yeah? You wanna tell me about them?"
You hesitated, because you didn't know where to begin. But then you nodded your head wordlessly, swallowing the lump — and, by extension, the sob — in your throat. "I fell down on the stairs at the train station in front of everybody. And then I missed my stop, and I was late to work. And I had a huge project due, but I didn't finish it, and I forgot I hadn't finished it, and I was anxious about it all day. And I think my friends are just pretending to be my friends, because I keep trying to make plans with one of them, and she keeps blowing me off for her boyfriend. And I'm just really sick of being sad all the time, Spencer. I want it to end."
With the onslaught of your bad vignettes throughout the past month coming back up, you broke down, again. Another sob escaping your lips as you pushed your fists down into the tops of his thighs.
If it hurt, he didn't say anything; simply continued to hold you against his chest, on the floor of your bathroom, that, if it were any other time, he would be having a field day rambling about the germs you both were currently sitting on. 
He also didn't say anything for a while as you sobbed, instead his fingers entangled gently in your hair, and he peppered kisses along the top of your head. 
"I don't want it to end for you," he finally said. His hands slid down from your scalp to your face, holding your cheeks with such tender, pulling you back so he could look at you. 
You sniffled. "I'm so exhausted."
"I know, my love. I know," he sighed, thumbs caressing over your cheekbones. "Ending it won't fix that. You know, logically, however you die is the state you'll be in, in the afterlife. So if you die while you're exhausted..."
"You don't believe in the afterlife," you answer, but his words still cracked through your tearful expression, and your lips twitched with a small smile. 
He returned the small smile, nodding his head. "That's true. But I also don't know anything about post-death. I could be wrong."
"How terrible," you mutter, and he laughed, quietly. 
"I know," he mused, falling silent for a few moments longer, with only both of your quiet breathing to break the silence. 
His fingers ran through your hair once more, and you sniffled audibly, your brain wandering away from the small content you had felt in that exchange, and back to one of the many reasons why you had isolated in the first place. 
"Why are you still with me?" you said, slicing through the silence all at once. 
You watched the smile fall, and his eyebrows furrowed, and his lips part as he went — and hesitated — to say something. "What do you mean?"
"I'm difficult." Your voice is impossibly small, and it breaks a crack in his heart as his eyes soften. 
"No. You're not," he reassured. 
"Yes I am," you breathed out — and then the tears came back. "I get sad and then I stop responding and stop seeing you, and you don't get any warning even though I know you should, and I feel so awful every time but then that makes me feel worse. And I'm sad all the fucking time, Spencer. I mean, I get upset when you aren't at home and you have to deal with all those messages and calls even though you hate texting, but then you get home and I'm isolating myself because I'm sad, on top of all the other things that make me sad, and you deserve better. You deserve someone who can give you their all and—and—"
"Hey," he cut you off, as did the sob that was ripped from your throat. "No. That's not what we're going to do. Do not sit there and tell me what I do and don't deserve." 
"But you do deserve better."
"No," he sighed, resting his forehead on your own, warm breath fanning across your face that usually made you scrunch your face up and pull away, now comforting you. "Do you love me?"
"What? Yes, of course I do. Why would you even—"
"—That is the only requirement I have for you," he said, oh so simply. When you didn't reply, he pressed, "Okay?"
"Okay," you murmured, and he relaxes a little.
More silence fell between you, your tears subsiding and your shaking body relaxing a little more. 
Then, "Did you hurt yourself when you fell down?"
You nodded your head, reluctantly pulling back from him so you could show him. You pointed to a yellowing bruise just below your knee, and the grazes on the bottom halves of your palms. 
"Oh, wow. Look at these," Spencer said, running a thumb gently over the grazes on your hands. "You're braver than me. These would've taken me out."
You laughed, and you saw his face light up at the progress he was making with you, and your mood. 
He then pulled you back into his chest. More silence, but less anxiety, and you sat comfortably in his arms for a few moments longer. 
"Did I worry you?" you say. "Not responding?"
You were so close to him you could hear his breath hitch, and you prepared yourself for a lie about how he wasn't worried at all. Except; "Honestly? Yes."
"Oh."
He exhaled, shakily, and you were kind of glad he couldn't see your sadder expression, half-buried into his chest. 
"You've never gone that long without checking in," he then explained. "The first two days I got what was going on. By the fourth I figured you still needed space. Today I just had a gut feeling."
"Just a gut feeling?" you echoed, and you felt his head nod against your own. 
"Thought you might need someone."
You sighed. "I hate that you're a genius."
"No you don't."
"No, I don't."
His fingers entangled in your hair again. "I also didn't figure you needed me here because I'm a genius."
"No? Then how?" you asked.
"It's simple," he murmured, tugging your head back oh so gently so he could look at you again — puffy eyed, and tear-stained cheeks and all. "I just know."
"That's the most illogical sentence I've ever heard leave your mouth."
He laughed, and you smiled again.
"Come on," he then said, untangling your limbs and pulling the both of you up to your feet, hands ghosting your waist to hold you steady. "I am willing to sit through whatever awful movie you want me to watch."
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly ♡
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asbealthgn · 2 years ago
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Eddie is used to getting recognized in public, but it doesn’t mean he likes it.
And Gareth knows how much he doesn’t like it, so Eddie’s not really sure why his best friend has completely abandoned him like this. Well, maybe abandon is a little dramatic. He said he’d be right back, but that was half an hour ago, and there’s only so many times he can circle the park and dive into bushes anytime someone gets too close. Which is why Eddie left the park altogether and is now sitting at a bus station. No one would expect notorious Corroded Coffin frontman Eddie Munson to be at a bus station, right?
Except he’s not sure the hat and sunglasses and incongruous location are quite doing their job. A group of kids across the road have stopped and they’re all whispering amongst themselves as they look at him. Eddie really wishes he had something to conceal himself with, but his hand over his face would definitely look way too suspicious. He’s thinking he might just have to cut and run and take his chances back in the park bushes.
That is, until the most beautiful man he’s ever seen in his life sits in the seat next to him, unfurling a giant map that easily shields both of them. Eddie’s fucking savior.
“Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know how to get to Japantown, would you?” the guy asks.
As it happens, Eddie does know how to get to Japantown. He hasn’t actually ridden the bus in years, but he still remembers the route. “Yeah,” he says, pointing it out on the map. “You just get on line five headed east and ride it like nine or ten stops until you get to McAllister and Fillmore. From there you just have to walk a few blocks to get into the area.”
The guy looks at him with big eyes, brown and a little droopy. “McAllister and Fillmore,” he repeats, like he’s trying to memorize it. He has pretty pink lips, glistening a little like he’s wearing lipgloss. 
Fuck, he’s adorable. And looks a bit prone to getting lost. And Eddie’s still kind of mad at Gareth for leaving him high and dry out here. So as the bus pulls up to the stop, Eddie figures what the hell?
“I’m actually headed that way,” Eddie says, standing. “I can show you.”
The guy’s whole face brightens and fuck, he really is gorgeous. “You don’t mind?”
“Not at all, big boy.”
The bus is blessedly empty other than one shriveled up lady sitting towards the front with her groceries and a teenager in the middle with giant headphones and their nose in a book. Eddie heads to the back with the guy, who now has a faint blush dusting his nose and cheeks.
“I’m Steve, by the way,” he says as he sits in the seat next to Eddie. “What’s your name?”
So that confirms that Steve doesn’t know who he is. It didn’t seem like he did from how he was reacting, but it’s a bit of relief to know for sure. “Eddie,” he says, bumping his shoulder into Steve’s. “Nice to meet you.”
Steve gives him a smile that’s about as radiant as the sun as he nudges Eddie’s shoulder back. “You too.”
“So what do you have going on in Japantown?” Eddie asks.
“I’m headed to a baby shower for some friends who live near there,” he says, “Well, it’s not a real baby shower.”
“No?”
“‘Cause it’s not a real baby. That is, it’s not a human baby.”
Eddie lifts his eyebrows. “I think you lost me.”
Steve twists in his seat and starts gesturing with his hands. “Well, it all started when they found out that one of their cats wasn’t actually spayed and had gotten knocked up by a stray,” he says, “And Robin was like, ‘Hey, more cats, that’s a good thing,’ and Nancy was like, ‘No, our neighbors already think we’re crazy cat ladies.’”
“Uh huh.”
“So they compromised and decided they would keep one kitten and give the rest away,” Steve says, “So it’s less of a come give us presents for our baby shower and more of a please take our babies away shower. You know?”
“Oh yeah, one of those,” Eddie says, and Steve laughs. 
“Hey, are you in the market for a kitten?” he asks. “Cause if you are, I totally know where you can get one.”
It’s Eddie’s turn to laugh. “Honestly?” he says, “I’ve got nothing else going on. Why the hell not?”
Steve gives him another one of those radiant smiles and Eddie can’t help but hope he gets more than a kitten by the end of this.
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lowkeychenle · 6 months ago
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Some Things Can't Be Taught [ZCL] (M)
Description: In which you are failing college physics, and your childhood best friend offers up one of his friends as your tutor—except, there’s a little something he wants to learn from you in exchange.
Genre: Smut/Fluff/Angst in some spots
Content Warnings: explicit, protected sex; awkward Chenle; reader is more experienced (Chenle is a virgin); reader and Chenle ridicule each other; use of pet name ‘baby’ (Chenle isn’t creative yet); oral sex (f & m receiving); alcohol consumption; explicit unprotected sex (reader on unnamed birth control lol); Chenle is somewhat of a fast learner
Word Count: 23,775
Taglist: @lostinneocity @dinosaurtoothbrushwithninjasauce @niinjo @once4sunrise @amyjipark @buns-inhiding @ti--red @defzcl @theboyz-jacob
Permanent Taglist: @sunnybutcloudy @neozon3nha @waffleuvs
Pairing: Zhong Chenle x fem!reader (features Dreamies, aespa Karina & Giselle)
Juliet's Masterlist | Tell me what you think? :)
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“Come on. It’s either this or you’re gonna fail.” Your best friend, Jisung, crosses his arms over his chest. “You need help, and I already asked him for you. He said yes, so you’ll have to suck it up.”
“Ji, I’ve never even met him before. He’s a complete stranger to me, and I don’t really care all that much if I fail.”
“(Y/N), it’s the first semester of college. You need to try a little harder or you’re gonna start failing everything,” Jisung scolds you.
His front door opens, and both of your gazes go toward the sound. Without even seeing who it is yet, you know exactly what’s happening.
“Park Jisung, did you literally tell him to—”
As soon as Jisung’s friend comes into view, your words die lodged in your throat. You blink a few times to make sure you’re seeing things correctly, and then glare at the man standing next to you. All he does is raise his eyebrows in response, a grin filtering onto his face.
“Who knows,” Jisung whispers, nudging your arm. “Maybe you’ll get more than a tutor.”
“Ew, Sungs, the last thing I need is you trying to find me dick. Please never say that again.”
Jisung’s friend is simply unlike any other man you’ve ever seen. He enters the kitchen, and despite running his fingers through his hair and sighing, he sends you a gentle smile before looking at Jisung.
“This is the girl who needs physics help?”
“And maybe physical edu—” Jisung wheezes as you backhand him in the stomach, nearly keeling him over. His friend bites back a laugh before returning his attention to you.
“Yes, I need help with physics. The class.”
“Is there any other kind of physics?”
You can’t get a read on him. Not really. His hair is neat, not a single strand out of place, and he’s wearing jeans with a button-down tucked into them. Glasses are perched on the bridge of his nose, and he’s carrying two fairly large textbooks.
An instance of silence takes over the room, but both you and this other guy are at a complete loss on what to do next. And for some reason, you can’t stop looking at him. It must be because your analysis isn’t working. He intrigues you, but only in the sense that it’s rare for you to be unable to see into people’s souls.
“(Y/N), this is Chenle, Chenle, this is (Y/N).” Jisung gestures between the two of you once he finally catches his breath.
“Hi, Chenle. Great to meet you. Jisung, can I talk to you for a few minutes? Over there?” You violently point in the opposite direction, but send a somewhat small smile over to Chenle. “Sorry, we’ll just be a second.”
He nods and sets his textbooks down on the counter. You pull Jisung by his wrist.
“What’s going on?” he asks. “I’m doing you a favor.”
“Now, I know you’ve got like, six girls in your phone you could’ve asked to help me with physics. Why him?” You cross your arms over your chest.
“Okay, look. Hear me out all the way first before you punch me.” Jisung sighs and shifts on his feet. “Chenle is literally the smartest person I know. Yes, including you. And he’s really nice, too, and I think you’d…I don’t know, like him eventually if you gave him the chance. You haven’t really done that recently.”
“Sure, but I like being single, Sungs. If I wanted someone, I would’ve asked.”
“You can just let him tutor you then. I know both of you pretty well, alright? I think you two could be good for each other. By all means, don’t date him or try to date him. But for the love of God, let him tutor you. He’s gonna do it for free, and you fucking need it.”
You roll your eyes, but he’s right. There’s no denying it. Letting out a sigh, you finally agree, “Fine. I’ll let him tutor me.”
What you told Jisung wasn’t a lie—you did like being single. And part of keeping yourself single (and happy) has been avoiding any men who might change one or both of those things. You’d never met Chenle before today, but the second you saw him, you knew. He had the potential to ruin your life…if you let him.
So, no dating. But you’ll take tutoring, because if you face the facts, Jisung is right. The last thing you need to do is fail a college course.
You and Jisung walk back over to Chenle. He’d made himself busy with getting a water bottle out of the fridge. Once he tilts it back, you almost curse yourself for your reaction—why the fuck are you watching him swallow it? Imagining the liquid roll down his throat and—
“Well, she said she’d greatly appreciate your tutoring, Chenle.” Jisung sends a bright grin over to his friend. “And she happens to live right next door. I have a…friend coming over, so if you two wanna get started, I’ll be here.”
Jisung wants you dead, apparently.
Chenle’s cheeks get a slight pink hue to them. “Oh, I didn’t—you won’t be there, too?”
“The hell do I need physics help for? I’m a dance major.” Jisung shrugs. “You kids have fun.”
“I’m older than you.” Chenle narrows his eyes.
“Yeah, me too.” You cross your arms over your chest and glare at your friend.
“Besides the point. Now, you two go. I’ve got plans today.”
“I hope you know I’m gonna kill you. Bring a stranger into my house with no warning, what if it’s messy in there?”
“Maybe you should keep your place clean.” Jisung shrugs.
You sigh and face your new tutor. “Is that okay with you? We can reschedule for a different day if that works better for you.”
“No, no.” Chenle shakes his head. “We’re good. I guess I wasn’t expecting to—it doesn’t matter. Let’s go?”
His books are back under his arm, and he uses his other hand to tell you to go to the door first. You send one last glare at Jisung before you leave his apartment with Chenle in tow. You’ve met him all of three seconds, and now you’re bringing him into your house. Great.
“You go to the same school as Ji?” you ask as you step inside your own place.
He runs his fingers through his hair again but nods. “Yeah, but I met him over the summer. At—”
“You go to Jeju for the summer, too?” You raise an eyebrow at him.
“Not usually.”
“I didn’t see you there,” you say, and instantly, your face heats up. “Not that it’s weird, just an observation. I was only there for like, a week, and I would’ve remembered seeing you—”
You cut yourself off, scratching your forehead. He chuckles, the corner of his lips pulling upward slightly.
“I was only there for the last week Jisung was.” He pushes his glasses up and follows you into your kitchen. “He’s pretty cool.”
You snort. “He’s alright. I’ve known him my whole life, unfortunately.”
“Your parents are friends?”
“Best friends,” you tell him. “Not that anything has ever—or will ever happen between us. I legitimately want to knock him out. Maybe put him in a chokehold.”
“I was kinda surprised he didn’t have us stay over there,” Chenle mentions. “I thought he’d give us a little bit more of an introduction.”
“Ah, him bringing a friend over means he’s about to get laid, actually,” you say, going into your fridge to grab some snacks. “Don’t worry, we won’t hear anything. His room’s not against this wall.”
His eyes widen, and he blinks incredulously at you. “Are you serious?”
“Mhm.” You set the strawberries and the watermelon down on the counter and open the lids. “Surprised you didn’t pick up on that. Thought it was some guy-code talk.”
“I…” He pauses, scratching his forehead. “Maybe? I don’t really know.”
“Want some?” You slide the fruit over to him, and you almost laugh when you see how he seems to be floundering for words.
“Sure. Did…What did you want to study today?”
“To be honest, I don’t really want to at all.” You pop one of the strawberries in your mouth. “It might be better for us to get to know each other first. Because right now, you’re a strange man in my apartment. And I’m not very fond of strange men.”
Your satisfaction grows when the pink returns to his cheeks.
“Right, sorry. I’m Zhong Chenle, but I think Jisung told you that already. I’m a physics major, actually, and not to brag or anything, but I’m the top of my class. And I also…also really like music. Singing and writing it.” He purses his lips, and after a few moments, decides he’ll take you up on the offer of snacks.
“You’re insane for being a physics major, just so you know.” You lean forward on your counter, clasping your hands together. “Music is cool.”
His gaze dances all over your figure, but he hides it somewhat well. You barely notice.
“You?”
“Oh, I’m not all that interesting.” You chuckle. “I haven’t declared my major yet. Not really sure what I want to do.”
“I mean, I’m not sure what I’ll do with physics. I’ll probably have to get a Masters if I want to be anything useful.” His tongue darts out to wet his lips. He rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet, and you find the awkwardness of all of it…endearing, maybe. You’ll keep going a bit longer.
“I see.” Intentionally being awkward is your forte. You’ll see how much he can handle. How much he’ll give back.
“We should at least do one chapter today,” he says after almost an entire minute of silence. “I told Jisung I would help. And if you push it back, there’s no guarantee you’ll do it.”
“Hm. Jisung is the only reason you want to tutor me?” You can’t help the smirk on your face. Nor can you ignore the way his face hasn’t lost the pink since he stepped foot in your apartment.
“I—I mean, yeah. No. Originally, yeah. He asked me to h—” he cuts himself off, a scoff escaping his lips. “I’m trying to be nice. I honestly don’t have a whole lot of friends outside of Jisung, either, so I guess he thought we could be good together. As friends, of course.”
Oh, let the games begin. This man wants to be your friend, and here you are, eyeing him up and down like he’s your next meal. Getting him flustered has all but unlocked a new portion of you you had no idea existed. Every guy you’ve ever dated has been your stereotypical jock, and certainly, none of them would’ve ever been able to tutor you. But the lack of confidence on Chenle’s part should be studied—how does he look like that and have no confidence? It astounds you.
“Of course,” you agree, biting into a piece of watermelon. “Fine. One chapter, but then you have to come with me to a party tomorrow night.”
“Tomorrow’s Tuesday.”
“Yeah, and?”
“We have school on Wednesday.” He blinks at you, pure confusion behind those pretty brown eyes.
“Chenle,” you deadpan. “Letting loose for one night won’t ruin your GPA. I wouldn’t let you drink enough to be hung over.”
“I’ve never been drunk before.” He clears his throat. “Or been to a party. That sounds like a bad idea.”
“And if I promise to stay with you the whole night? I promise, parties are fun. And Jisung will be there. We won’t let anything happen to you.” You stand up straight and cross your arms over your chest. “Not to mention parties are a great place to make friends.”
“I’m not…great at that.”
“Oh, come on.” You glare at him. “I let you tutor me in physics—”
“Let me?”
“Yes, let. And I’ll tutor you on how to make friends. How to get out of your shell a little bit. I can’t pay you money for school help, so let me do this. It’s a good exchange.”
“I literally didn’t ask for anything in exchange, though.”
“It’ll make me feel better.”
He presses his lips into a thin line. “Fine. But if I really don’t want to do something, you can’t make me.”
“Dear God, obviously.” You scrunch your nose up. “Fear not, Chenle, I find consent sexy.”
His lips part, but you’re pretty sure you see him gulp. You put the lids back on the containers and set them back in the fridge, sending a smile his way once you’ve let him flounder enough.
“First step of making friends, be confident.” You point at him. “You’re pretty nice to look at. Get rid of the awkwardness and you’ll have people all over you.”
“Oh, great.” Sarcasm twinges in his tone. “What is this? One of those makeover projects?”
“No, of course not. I’m not changing anything about you. I never understood why they always take the glasses off in those movies. They suit you.” You shrug and walk over to him to look at the books he has.
Your arm brushes his, and he blinks at you. When he doesn’t move away, you smirk. At the end of the day, you don’t want to make him uncomfortable…at least not in a bad sense. But teasing him? If it continues to be this easy to fluster him, then you’ll have a great time with it.
“Shall we?”
He nods. “Um, are we studying in here?”
“There’s not really anywhere to sit. We can go in my room.”
“Your—(Y/N), I—”
“Relax, I’m not luring you into a trap, you weirdo. I’ll be on my bed and you can use the desk.” You gesture toward your door. “We’ll even leave it open.”
“You don’t live alone?”
“Nope, my roommate is at class right now. Not too sure when she’ll be back though, she spends a lot of time at her boyfriend’s house.” You walk toward your room, and he follows behind you.
“We’ll have to share the book, though.” He sets it down on the desk.
Seeing him in your room is odd, to say the least. Mostly because you just met him today, but also because he seems to fit. You sit on the edge of your bed, and with the lamp in the corner not quite bright enough to light up the whole area, it casts shadows on his face. He looks even prettier like this, and you suddenly regret bringing him in here.
“And…the light?”
You point to the wall. “There.”
“Alright, sit at the desk. I’ll stand.” He flicks the switch on and watches you closely as you get up to do as he asks.
“Are you sure? I feel bad making you stand.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he reassures you. “We can meet somewhere else next time. Or get another chair.”
And then he puts the book in front of you, opens it to the first chapter, and places his palm flat on it to keep it on that page. You’d attempt to ignore the way his hand looks, but the way the other one is placed behind you on the chair is a much more dangerous thought.
How Jisung knows exactly who would be your type is crazy. You hate him for it.
“Can you do a physics fun fact? Maybe it’ll make my life less miserable.” You look up at him and see the gentle smile on his face.
“Sure. We’ll do one every lesson. Let me think.” He ponders for a moment, pursing his lips. “Diamonds. They’re the hardest natural material on Earth, well, that we know of. But it has the lowest crystal packing fraction, meaning the atoms are the least densely packed.”
“That’s…physics?”
He shrugs. “Sure.”
“Huh. Alright, then. I feel like I should write that down.” You grab a notebook from your drawer and scribble down what he just said.
“You have pretty handwriting,” he mentions, a hum escaping his throat.
Leave it to you to have warmth spreading to your cheeks from a compliment on your handwriting.
“Oh, thanks.” You clear your throat and slide the notebook to the side. “Should we…learn, I guess?”
“Yeah, for sure.”
It takes an hour to get through the first chapter, but Chenle thoroughly explains it in a way that suddenly has you understanding the very basics. As much as you hate to admit it, Jisung was right. Chenle’s a damn good tutor.
“You caught on fast.” He nudges your arm.
“Well, you didn’t explain it like a decrepit old man who speaks at one word per hour.” You chuckle. “You’re easy to listen to.”
“Wow, your poor professor.”
“No, poor me, alright? He also stands with his elbows permanently glued to his sides. He looks like a T-rex.”
He laughs out loud at that one, reaching up to massage his forehead. “That’s ridiculous.”
“I know. Now you know why I suck at physics.”
“You don’t suck at it,” he defends you. “It takes time to learn. And…good teachers.”
It’s at this point that you realize he’ll be leaving. And that you’ve been making him stand for an hour, it’s almost dinner time, and he’s been incredibly kind (and not weird or impatient) the entire duration.
“Um, I’m really sorry about making you stand for so long. Can I buy you dinner? I feel bad for being a little bit of an ass earlier, too.” You push the chair back and climb to your feet. He’s close like this, and you still have to look up slightly to catch his gaze.
“Oh, I’m supposed to go somewhere with Jisung and our other friend, Mark. If you’re okay with it, you should come.” He must be more comfortable with you, too, because he hasn’t made a single move to back away from you.
“To be honest, new people kinda scare me. I have a max amount per day.”
He smiles. “That’s the most relatable thing you’ve said all day. No worries.”
“Rain check, though?”
“For sure. Did you want to set up another session?” he asks. “Whenever works for you, I can make it happen. I have class on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, pretty much until 5pm, but other than that…depending on how much you need, I can do all the weekdays at like, 7pm, but I obviously wouldn’t stay super late. School’s important, and—”
“Seven is great. I’m gonna need a lot of help.” You stick your hands into your pockets. “And tomorrow? You’re still going?”
“A deal’s a deal.” He nods.
“Do you want to meet me here? Jisung’s going, too, so he can drive the three of us.”
“Sounds good.”
“Alright.”
“Yep.”
“Have a good time with your friends.”
“Have a good time…recharging.”
Silence cascades over the two of you once again, and this time, it’s broken by both of you cringing and laughing at yourselves. You walk him to your front door and then find yourself in a similar situation, only now you’re in the hallway of your apartment building.
It’s too awkward to say you want to hang out with him more, but it’s also too awkward to rush him out of the door.
“Oh,” you say, reaching into your pocket for your phone. “Do you want to exchange numbers? That way if there are any changes or something, we can reach each other.”
“For sure.”
You offer it to him with the contacts screen open, and he takes it from you. He quickly types his number in and hands it back to you. You start to say something, and then you notice Jisung out of the corner of your eye. Immediately, you snap your mouth shut and take a large step back from the man in front of you.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He gives you a small smile before walking toward Jisung, and without another moment of hesitation, you close your door and groan to yourself. Jisung will never let you hear the end of this. Good thing Chenle will most likely get a barrage of teasing today, because it might get it out of Jisung’s system by the time he’s around you again.
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You’re finishing up your makeup in your bathroom when Jisung stops mid-sentence, perturbed by the knock sounding on the door. With your lip gloss on, you turn to Jisung.
“I need to go change. Can you get that? It’s Chenle.”
“It’s…I’m sorry, did you just say Chenle’s here?”
“Wow, you can hear with those big ass ears. I’m surprised.” You feign shock. “Yes, please let him in. And don’t be weird. It’s not what you think at all, so if you make him awkward, I’ll kill you.”
“What is happening?” he mutters to himself as you close your bedroom door to change.
The party isn’t a huge one, so you planned on going in a more relaxed outfit than you originally thought. You settle for a crop top, jeans, and boots. After you look at yourself in the mirror six times to make sure it looks fine, you leave your room to find Jisung and Chenle have barely made it a few feet inside your apartment.
Jisung’s back is to you, but Chenle faces you. It seems like he stops mid-conversation at the sight of you, and after Jisung turns to you as well, you pretend not to notice the other man’s gaze lingering on you.
“Three years later. Did you cut the shirt yourself?” Jisung grumbles.
“You’re ridiculous. Are you guys ready?”
“Wait, Chenle’s going?” Jisung glances between the two of you. “Like, for real?”
“Obviously. Why else would he be here?”
“You…invited him to a party. And he…said yes.”
“Sorry, Chenle, sometimes I have to repeat things seven times for him to understand me. Can we go?”
Jisung’s at a loss, which makes both you and Chenle chuckle. The car ride to the party is fairly short, but you let Chenle take the front seat, and you sit in the middle in the back. Leaning forward, you rest your elbows on the center console as you talk to the two men.
“You guys are hanging out at this party together?” Jisung asks.
“Now you’re just making it weird,” the other man mentions, pushing his glasses up. “She invited me. I wasn’t gonna say no.”
“I invite you places all the time.”
“Well, Sungs.” You pat his shoulder. “Should I point out the obvious differences? I’m more charismatic than you. And cuter.”
You grin to yourself at the plastering of pink on Chenle’s cheeks, and he averts his gaze out the window to avoid Jisung seeing.
You walk in front of them, essentially leading them into this house. Your friend throws these all the time, and you and Jisung are always on the invite list. Mostly because you’re a package deal at this point, but also because you’re pretty sure your friend has a crush on him.
“I’m gonna get a drink.” You head toward the kitchen, and when you glance back, Chenle is following behind you.
“Jisung found a girl, I think,” he explains. “Is it okay if I—”
“You think I’d leave you by yourself? You don’t even really want to be here. Of course, you can hang out with me.” You pause and wait for him to catch up, and then loop your arm through his.
He’s surprised at first but allows you to guide him through the crowd of people. There are several of your friends in the kitchen—Karina, Jaemin, and Renjun. They all light up at the sight of you, but then immediately catch where you’re attached to Chenle.
“Sorry, there’s more than one new person here for you.” You look back at him quickly. “They’re all nice, don’t worry.”
“I think I’ve met that one,” Chenle says. “Renjun, right?”
You beam at him. “Right. That’s good then.”
Chenle stands next to you on the opposite side of the kitchen island as you animatedly talk to your friends. You introduce him to them, explain how he’s your new tutor (Jisung sponsored), and that you thought it’d be cool for him to hang out with everyone. Your group is immediately welcoming, and soon enough, Jaemin offers to pour you guys each a drink.
You glance at Chenle. “You don’t have to drink if you don’t want to.”
“I never have.” He shrugs. “First time for everything, right?”
“Rum and Coke,” you tell Jaemin. “Go easy on the rum, though. We don’t want to be dragged out of here.”
Once the drinks are poured into the red cups, Jaemin hands them to the two of you. You sip yours, watching Chenle closely as he lifts it to his lips. Just like with that fucking water bottle yesterday, you can’t help but stare as he swallows the liquid, and you know damn well your friends are clocking this whole thing.
“Not bad,” he says.
“There’s barely any alcohol in it,” you tease him. “Did you want to go sit down? Jaemin’s selective about who’s allowed in the living room, so the couch will be open.”
“Selective?”
“Well, one time, this random couple hooked up on his old couch. Like, in front of everyone. It was crazy. But he also replaced that couch, so no need to worry about it being gross.” You laugh as Chenle’s jaw drops.
“People just…do that at parties?”
“Not typically in the middle of the party, but sometimes, yeah. But that doesn’t mean you have to, so don’t freak out.” You grab his wrist and lead him toward the couch, glad to see that the only other people in there are Jeno, Giselle, Jisung, and a girl you don’t recognize sitting on his lap.
“This is already a lot better,” Chenle murmurs, his breath brushing your ear as he leans down to tell you.
“Good,” you reply.
“Well, well, well.” Jisung clicks his tongue. “You were supposed to be a good influence on her, not let her poorly influence you.”
“There’s like, half a shot of rum in there.” You sneer at your best friend. 
“Whatever. Plan is working.”
You flip him off, and then you and Chenle take a seat opposite of everyone. He keeps a respectful distance from you and holds his cup with both hands, nervously glancing around.
“Don’t tell me you put Chenle in (Y/N)’s line of fire,” Giselle teases, grinning widely.
“You guys are gonna make him think I’m weird,” you complain. You touch Chenle’s arm. “I’m not evil, they’re just assholes.”
“I’m inclined to believe you, I think.” He shrugs. Attempting to hide the humorous gleam in his eyes, he takes another sip of his drink.
The night passes by somewhat quickly, and eventually, the whole group is in the living room, meaning no one is really paying attention to you and Chenle anymore. You’ve had enough to start feeling a buzz, and the way the pink on Chenle’s cheeks has become permanent tells you he might be a bit past that part himself.
“Maybe we should get some water,” you whisper to him. “Are you okay?”
He nods, and when he looks at you, you almost recoil at how close it makes you. Resting his head back on the cushion, he takes a deep breath. “This is nice. I’m not really stressed about anything right now.”
“Yeah, it happens like that.” You allow yourself a brief glance over the length of his throat, and the alcohol coursing through you has you wanting more than you’d ever admit out loud.
“Can I tell you a secret?” He lets out a sigh.
“If you want to, sure.” You nod.
“Think you’re really pretty.” He laughs, scrunching up his nose. “And talking to you is cool.”
“Well, if it helps at all, I think you’re pretty, too.” Your heart warms at the sight of him like this. You’ve known him just over twenty-four hours, but you knew he needed this—a way to relax and stop worrying about life. You’re not sure exactly what parts are stressing him out, but he needed to get away from them regardless.
“Thank you for not making that weird.” He scratches his forehead. “Maybe I should drink water.”
“Stay here, I’ll get it for you.” You set your cup down on the coffee table and go back into the kitchen.
As you’re grabbing two water bottles from the fridge, you’re joined by Jisung.
“You’re taking care of him now?”
“Relax. It’s a water bottle.” You shake your head. “It’s not like that.”
“Sure.”
“I’m surprised you came up for air. Breaking away from what’s-her-face must’ve been difficult.” You stop in the doorframe and sigh. “You were right, though. He’ll be a good friend.”
“That’s all I needed.” Jisung grins. “Both of you need more of those.”
“I take it back. We’re gonna fight outside.”
“I’d drop your ass and you know it,” your best friend jokes. “But try if you must.”
You make it back to Chenle, who gratefully accepts the bottle from you. When you sit, you don’t realize how much closer the two of you were from when you first sat down. There’d been a good foot of space between you guys, and now your thigh brushes his.
“Are you tired?” you ask him. “I can take you home.”
“Go…home. Like…with you?” His gaze drags over you, and your eyes widen.
“As in, I drop you off at your home, and then I go to mine.” You put your hand on his knee. “Are you alright?”
“I never told you the physics fun fact of the day.” He points at you. “The screens of smartphones work thanks to the electric charges leaving our fingers. But yours didn’t. ‘Cause you didn’t text me.”
“Did I leave you waiting?” You nudge him.
He nods. “Mhm. It’s not nice.”
“Alright, I’m sorry.” You bite back a smile. Who knew a somewhat tipsy man could be so fucking cute? “I’ll text you right now.”
You grab your phone and send him a message. It vibrates in his pocket.
“Oh, hold on. I think someone just texted me.” He grabs it and checks it, and then grins widely. “It was you.”
“It was me, yes.” You wave Jisung down, waiting until he’s close enough to hear you. “Can you take him home? It’s best if he’s done for tonight.”
“You’re staying?”
“For now, yeah. I had too much to drive him.”
“Sure. Is he coherent?” Jisung glances at the other man. “Hangover bets?”
“He won’t be hung over. He had like three drinks with barely any alcohol. Don’t tease him. Be nice and take him home. Make sure he actually makes it to his bed, okay?”
“Jeez, what are you, his mom?”
“My mom’s at home right now,” Chenle mutters.
“Yeah, I’ll make sure he’s okay.”
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The next morning, you didn’t receive a message from Chenle. You were curious as to how he was feeling and if he’d been okay all night. And you thought about messaging him closer to seven when he was supposed to show up, but you decided not to. If he didn’t come at the scheduled time, you could do it then.
But he did.
He showed up with his textbooks in hand, and an apology for his actions on the tip of his tongue. You quickly brushed it under the rug—if anyone knows anything about drunk thoughts, it’s you. All discussion of the night before was done after that, and the two of you simply continued your tutoring.
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Weeks later, it was 7:30pm on a Thursday, and you were sitting on your bed, your back against the wall and your arm pressed against Chenle’s. The physics book was open across both laps, and his soft voice guided you through whichever lesson you were on now.
“So, the universe is still growing?” you ask.
“Oh, yeah. Every second it’s expanding. It has been for billions of years and will continue on for another billion years after we’re gone.” His eyes widen as he shifts to get a better look at you. “Think about it. All those stars out there, the planets. We’re still discovering new ones almost every new place we unlock. This is my favorite part of physics—learning why everything is the way it is. Real explanations, and not just…talk.”
Those same stars he’s talking about? You’re pretty sure they’re scattered in his gaze, staring right back at you as he allows his passion to shine through.
“Chenle,” you say, pausing briefly. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“You told me before you’ve never dated anyone. Why?”
“Oh.” He clears his throat. “I never really wanted to. I’m focused a lot on my schoolwork and stuff, I figured I wouldn’t have time. So, I just…didn’t. And let’s be honest here, it’s not like I had a whole lot of prospects, anyway.”
You stare at him with a raised brow before he returns the expression.
“What? I’m serious.”
“You’ve got to be joking. Like actually.”
“Come on, all I do is study. I don’t even really talk to anyone, so how would I have had any?” He sits up further and stretches, moving his glasses to rub his eyes.
“Well, now you do talk to people. Anyone you’ve been interested in?”
“I thought we were doing this to make me friends, not find me a girlfriend.” He presses his lips together. “Besides, I don’t have any time. I probably won’t until after I graduate.”
“Dude, you spend pretty much every night with me. That’s why you don’t have time. And being interested in someone doesn’t necessarily mean you have to date them.” You cross your arms over your chest.
“Right, and so what does that interest even do, then?”
“I have to spell this out for you?” You narrow your eyes at him.
“I’m genuinely confused.”
“Hook up with someone. College is important, yeah, but have some fun.”
He laughs. “I don’t want that, either. We both know I don’t have the confidence for something like that, and it doesn’t sound all that appealing. Not that I judge people who do. I’m obviously friends with Jisung. And I genuinely wouldn’t have any clue how to handle that situation.”
“It’s very simple. You approach girl, flirt, make her laugh, dance a little, and then if she’s into you, you take her somewhere—”
“Not what I meant.”
Your jaw drops as realization hits you, and you slap your hand over your mouth. “Oh, my God, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think you’d—and now I’m being an asshole because I—dude.”
“Relax,” he says. “It’s not really a big deal. You didn’t mean anything by it, and if anything, it’s flattering you didn’t think that was a possibility.”
“Dear God, someone delete me from this Earth.” You glance up at the ceiling. “So, obviously, don’t hook up with random people if that’s not how you want to lose it. Is it one of those waiting til marriage things?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “Just no opportunities have presented themselves that seemed worth it. In the past.”
“This is embarrassing. For me, not you.” You drop your head in your hands. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”
He puts his hand on your shoulder. “You don’t make me uncomfortable. I wouldn’t have told you if that were the case. Let’s just stick to finding me friends for now, alright?”
“Of course, yeah. That makes sense.” You take a deep breath, pausing. “I’m getting hungry. Do you wanna go get some food?”
“Sure, sounds good. I’ll pay this time.”
“No, you won’t.” You poke his chest. “Nice try, though.”
You spring up from your bed, suddenly feeling as if the distance between him and your bedroom needs to be far greater than what it has been. Time to erase the last ten minutes from your memory and hope it doesn’t make absolutely everything weird between the two of you.
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Everything was normal until the next Saturday. You don’t usually see Chenle on the weekends unless there’s a party you’re dragging him to. Today, you hoped to relax your brain and take a day for yourself, but the knock at your door decided otherwise.
You open it, and Chenle stands there, looking as if he’s about to be sick to his stomach. Recoiling, you step back to let him in, and he enters without a word.
“Are you okay?” you ask. “You didn’t tell me you were coming.”
“I don’t want to be a virgin anymore.”
You flounder for words, unsure of how to handle this situation. “I thought you wanted a real opportunity—”
“Opportunities are made, aren’t they?” He wets his lips. “How do I…I don’t want to be fucking awful when I do find someone, okay?”
“Chenle, that’s a wild way to think of it. If you want to be with someone you love, and you’re in a relationship long enough to get to that point, the other person should be understanding—”
“It’s not a big deal. Societal constructs or whatever.”
“I…Okay. I’ll help you find someone.” Your brain whirls at the sudden switch, and you shift on your feet. “Are you sure?”
There’s a moment of silence, accompanied with him looking up at the ceiling briefly, as if there are words locked in his throat he desperately wants to let out. He curses under his breath and shakes his head.
“I don’t want someone random.”
“You have someone in mind?”
“This is so fucking embarrassing.” He laughs at himself and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Please don’t be weirded out by this. But I need to be with someone I trust, and you…you’re the only girl I trust.”
The shock hits you so hard, you’re almost knocked off balance. You knew Chenle had gotten more comfortable with you, but this stretches a bit beyond that. And before you knew he was a virgin, you wouldn’t have said no to hooking up with him.
“Me.” You gulp. “You want…to have sex with me.”
“Okay, now it’s weird.” His fists clench at his sides and he avoids your gaze. “Forget I came by, okay? I’m sorry that was so weird, we can just never talk about it again, and I’ll keep…being me, and—”
“Slow down, please.” You card your fingers through your hair and try to force the shock away. “I didn’t even respond. Give me like three seconds to wrap my head around it.”
He nods in response, staring down at his feet.
“So, you…you trust me. And because of that, you want me to take your virginity?” You’re still not completely caught up.
“Yeah, it sounded better in my head, I think.”
“Is that the only reason you want me instead of someone else?” you ask.
“What do you mean by that?” He plays with the bottom hem of his T-shirt. “But you’re not—it’s not like that. I trust you. We both know I think you’re pretty. I’ve learned a lot of…things from you, and I thought that maybe we could—”
“You want sex lessons.”
“Can you—My God, please don’t say it like that.” He cringes.
“It’s not weird,” you reassure him. “I didn’t expect this. At all, clearly. Um, I need a little bit of time to think about it.”
“I’m so sorry. I don’t want things to change with us because you’re really a great person, and I…You know I won’t be mad at you or anything if you say no. I get it.”
“I didn’t think you would be.” You pause. “I’ll give you an answer tomorrow. I need to process a little more.”
“Of course. Thank you. Either way.”
More silence.
“Um, did you know that sound waves could heat up cold soup?”
The awkwardness swarming the two of you shatters as you laugh. “You’re ridiculous. Truly the only man I know that’ll proposition sex in one sentence and then move on to fucking physics.”
“Icebreakers. They work wonders.” He shrugs.
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If it was possible for your brain to be on one topic for an entire twenty-four hours, that’s exactly what happened to you. When the topic first came up, Chenle seemed like he wanted someone special to share the moment with. Now, he wants to get it out of the way. And he wants your help. If he regrets it, there’s literally nothing you’ll be able to do to change that. And you’d undeniably been attracted to him from the moment you saw him, but that doesn’t mean this was the best way to go about this. He trusts you. He said that with his whole chest, and you’re not sure if that’s the entire reason. So you came up with some stipulations, and if any of them are a no for him, then you won’t do it. You’re about as nervous as he was when he came over to ask you, but you text him and tell him to come over. When he sits next to you on your couch, you fidget with your hands in your lap. You don’t know exactly how to just say it.
“Before I make my decision, there are a few things you’d have to be okay with.” You clear your throat, and you watch realization dawn on his face.
“Okay. What is it?” he asks.
“First, I’m clean and on birth control, so protection is up to you whether or not you want to use it. But it’s a good habit to start, obviously. For when you…eventually hook up with other people, too.”
He gulps. “That makes sense.”
“We don’t tell Jisung.”
“I think he’d kill me if he knew, anyway.” He grips his thighs tightly, fingers digging into the fabric of his jeans.
“If I do something or ask you to do something you don’t want to do, tell me. I would never get mad at you for telling me no, okay?”
“Same would go to you.”
“If you were to ever…find that you’re falling for me, or catching feelings, you have to tell me. And we’ll stop.” You analyze him closely, waiting for any change in his face.
He chews on his bottom lip, but ends up nodding.
“You still have to tutor me in physics. And if things get too awkward and I fail, I’ll kill you.”
That one makes him laugh, and his grip on his legs relaxes. “I won’t let you fail.”
“We’ll still be friends after this?” you inquire. “Like, we’re not gonna do this and then you’ll fall off the face of the Earth or anything?”
“It’s—”
“Don’t tell me it’s impossible. Just answer the question.”
He gives you a soft smile. “I’m not going anywhere. Promise.”
With that, you stand up and hold out your hand. He stares blankly at you, lips slightly open as he tries to figure out what you’re trying to do.
“No better time than the present.”
“Oh, we…you…we’re gonna do this now?” He stands up.
“We don’t have to. Let’s see where it goes.” You grab his hand and tilt your head at him. “If you’re okay with that.”
“It’s just…I’d want to get condoms, and I didn’t bring any because I thought this was going in a completely different direction—”
“I have some.”
“You…” He wets his lips. “Okay, yeah. Let’s, um, see where it goes.”
Chenle allows you to guide him into your room, and then he’s sitting on the edge of your bed. Giving yourself one more mental pep talk, you straddle his lap, not quite sitting all the way down yet. His breath hitches, and his fists clench at his sides.
“Relax,” you whisper. “You know I’ll take care of you. You can touch me.”
He hesitantly lifts his hands up to find your waist, barely gripping you while refusing to break eye contact.
“Have you ever kissed someone before?” you ask, unable to hide how closely you’re staring at his parted lips.
“Not recently,” he responds. “Probably not one that counts.”
“Follow my lead, okay? And you can stop me at any point if you want to.”
You adjust yourself and sink down on his lap. He’s already half hard, the firmness of his length pressing into your core.
“Sorry,” he mutters. “It’s…”
“Don’t apologize.” You chuckle, almost breathlessly. “That’s what’s supposed to happen.”
He scoffs at you, his pointed look does well in breaking the awkward tension between the two of you. You cup his cheek, eyes trailing over his face as you trace his bottom lip with your thumb.
He watches you through a curious, almost hazy gaze. Like he’s admiring you with him like this. Swallowing the rest of your nerves, you lean forward and press your mouth to his. He inhales sharply, his fingers gripping your shirt. The movement is awkward, and he doesn’t reciprocate right away.
“Chenle,” you say. “I said follow my lead. You have to…move your lips a little.”
“Sorry, it’s new—”
“Stop apologizing. There’s nothing wrong with any of it. Just listen and learn.”
He nods, and you return to kiss him. This time, he matches your movements, and that’s when you realize just how fast of a learner he is. You reach up to weave your fingers into his hair. He gasps, pulling away to look at you. Your lip gloss shines on his lips, and you’re certain that a new part of yourself has been unlocked.
“You’re…so pretty.” His voice strains.
“What do you want?” you ask.
“You.” He gulps. “I-if that’s okay.”
“Have you thought about this before?” You trace along his jawline. “Me?”
He sucks in a breath. “I didn’t mean to. At first. And then you…we talked about hooking up with people, and all I could see was you.”
“What kind of thoughts, Chenle?” While all you want to do is keep kissing him, you move your lips down from his jaw to his neck.
“(Y/N), I—”
“If you want to do this, you have to stop being scared of saying the wrong thing,” you hum, and when you find his pulse thrumming beneath your lips, you gently bite down.
“Fuck,” he chokes out. “I-I’ve seen enough porn, okay? I don’t usually think about people I know like that, but I’ve imagined what you’d feel like.”
The desperate twinge to his voice has you wishing you could clench your thighs together. You don’t want to do too much right off the bat, but he’s fully hard beneath you now, pressing directly into your core. Despite your own slight embarrassment, you allow your lips to brush his ear.
“Do you touch yourself to those thoughts?”
His grip tightens again, and his pants nearly turn into whines. “Yes.”
“I think we should slow down,” you tell him. “Don’t wanna overwhelm you.”
He sighs when you lift yourself off his lap. You take your usual spot against the wall and pat the bed next to you, and he joins you without hesitation. When you lean in to kiss him, he quickly reciprocates. You’re surprised by how fast he caught on to the movement, because the kiss is nothing but enjoyable for you.
“Can I touch you?” you ask, tapping your fingers on his upper thigh.
He nods fervently, but quickly pulls you back into a kiss. You smile against his lips before popping the button on his jeans. He curses quietly at the sound of you pulling his zipper down. You push down on them, and he lifts his hips to assist you. Pausing the kiss, you look down at where he strains in his boxers.
“It’s not gonna take very long.” He lets out a weak laugh. “Don’t wanna make a mess.”
“Let me worry about that,” you tell him.
You pull back for a split second to look at his face, finding lust waltzing around in his irises. He either can’t hide it or doesn’t want to, but you have him wrapped around your finger. His lips are swollen from kissing you, and he’s never been more attractive to you. Your thighs clench together, and the warmth between them is undeniable.
“You sure?” you whisper.
He nods, and you go back for another kiss in an attempt to distract him from you pulling at the hem of his boxers. The sound that escapes from his mouth into yours sends a shiver up your spine. God, the things you’d do to him if it wouldn’t melt his brain. You trail your finger up his length, collecting some of the precum from his tip.
He curses but doesn’t break the kiss, his hand now tightly gripping your thigh. His touch sends sparks through you, and you wrap your hand around him.
You stroke him up and down, grinning into the kiss when you feel how he pulses against your palm. He struggles to keep his focus on kissing you the longer you slowly pump his cock. You sink your teeth into his bottom lip, gently tugging it as you rub your thumb across his tip. A long moan escapes his mouth, and his head thuds back against the wall, and within seconds strings of white pump from him.
You catch as much of it as you can in your hand and kiss him again to quiet him down. This exchange is softer, slower than your previous, and he all but melts into you as he attempts to calm his breathing.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I—”
“Don’t apologize.” You slide away from him to grab a towel from your closet. “That was the whole reason I did it.”
You won’t tell him how weak your legs are and how bad you want his hands all over you, considering it’s very likely he wouldn’t know what to do with you anyway. As soon as your hand is cleaned off, you come back to find him zipping and buttoning his pants.
“Can I ask you something?” He chews the inside of his cheek.
“Chenle, my hand was just on your penis. Of course, you can ask me anything.” You chuckle at him.
“Did that…do anything to you? Are you turned on?”
Embarrassment replaces the heat already on your cheeks as you turn to him. “I mean, yeah. But that’s a good thing, obviously.”
“You don’t want me to help you?”
For the thousandth time this weekend, you’re floundering for words in his presence, but you can’t deny how much you do, indeed, want that. You figured he’d not even think about it, leave, and then you could just take care of yourself instead.
“I…”
“If not, that’s okay. But I didn’t want to learn how it felt for just me, you know.” He shifts to the edge of the bed and holds his hand out to you. “C’mon. Show me how to help you. Besides, I definitely owe you now.”
“Okay.” You step toward him and slide your palm on his, gasping when he tugs you into him.
He moves to place your back against the mattress, your head hitting the pillows. Hovering over you, he allows his gaze to travel down to your mouth. You spread your legs to accommodate him, grabbing his hand and placing it on your thigh.
“You could say I’ve…studied this part a little.” He wets his lips. “But I don’t hold too much stock in that stuff being real, so…”
You chuckle. “That’s good. Porn is very unrealistic.”
“How do you want me to do this?” he asks. “Um, I can use my hand or if you want oral, that’s…yeah.”
“Let’s make sure you’re good with your hands first, alright?” You weave your fingers through his hair and rub your thumb against his scalp.
“I want you to feel good, too.” He furrows his eyebrows as if he’s trying to figure something out. When he leans down, he brushes his lips against your jawline, mimicking the way you kissed his neck earlier.
“Chenle,” you whisper, letting your head fall back against the pillow. “Come lay next to me.”
He listens to you quickly, making sure your back is flat against his chest. His arm is snug around your waist as he brushes your hair out of the way to leave wet, open-mouthed kisses along your neck. You skin buzzes everywhere he touches you.
“Don’t be afraid of me, okay?” you tell him. “Foreplay is the most important part of sex for a girl. It’s harder for us to finish, so you’ve gotta…be deliberate.”
“Mhm,” he hums, squeezing your hip.
“You can explore.”
“Show me where.” He most likely meant it to make sure he doesn’t do anything you don’t want him to, but as you place your hand over his to guide him, more warmth spreads between your thighs. You slide him beneath your shirt, slowly moving him over your skin.
“You’re so warm.” He kisses your shoulder. “Soft.”
You stop at your breasts, a soft moan escaping you as you have him squeeze. Your head falls against his chest, and you bite your lip as you move him beneath your bra. He whispers a curse, and you can’t stop yourself from squirming against him.
You move your hand away from his, and he moves to your other breast. His thumb brushes over your nipple, and your eyes nearly roll back into your head. Sure, you told him what to do, but the feeling of his fucking hands on you has your fantasies running wild.
“Was that okay?” he asks.
You nod and tug on his wrist. “Now, when you really start, you have to make sure whoever you’re with is wet. If she’s really wet, it’ll feel better for both of you.”
“How will I know the difference between—”
“Touch me.” You push him toward the apex of your thighs. “That’s what really wet feels like.”
He slides his hand beneath your shorts. “(Y/N), I don’t…I don’t know how—”
“It’s okay,” you say, putting your palm on him again. “I’ll show you.”
He cups your core and gently rubs back and forth. “Doesn’t this ruin your panties?”
“Precisely why I try to take them off as quickly as possible in these situations, smart ass.” You scoff. “Are you sure you want to do this? It’ll get messy.”
“You caught my cum in your hand. It’s the least I can do.” He shifts down a bit and waits for you to look at him so he can kiss you. In the midst of the kiss, you move him beneath your panties. He lets out a shaky sigh when he feels the wetness against his skin.
“Few, um, key things going on here,” you tell him. You position his fingers over your clit. “This is the clit. Don’t ever forget that. It’s arguably the most important thing on my body. In…this case, I mean.”
“Mhm.” His breathing is uneven against your neck, but he listens intently.
You move further down to your entrance. “This is where you’re gonna put those pretty fingers to use, okay?”
“You’re so wet,” he comments, his forehead dropping on your shoulder. “I can’t believe this is happening.”
You pull him back to your clit. “Start here. Don’t be a psycho. Going slow is good until she tells you to hurry the fuck up.”
“Stop saying it like that,” he says, allowing you to move him in whatever way will make you feel good. 
“Like what?” you ask, your hips unintentionally grinding down on his fingertips.
“She. I’m with you right now. Only wanna think about you.” He clicks his tongue. “I got it now.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
You move your hand away from his, sighing as he continues his circles. “When you put your fingers in, use your thumb to keep rubbing the clit.”
“Is it normal that I really feel like I might cum in my pants?” He chuckles.
“Considering this is your first time touching a real vagina, yes.”
He slides his fingers inside you, the length of them alone making your eyes roll back. When you moan, he lets out a similar sound, his hips pushing against your ass. You close your eyes, truly not expecting much out of him in the slightest. You’ll probably have to remind him—
His thumb finds your clit as he starts pumping his fingers inside you, and your back arches from the pleasure. You’re desperate to finish from getting him off earlier, and you start to believe he might just get you there.
“If it’s…it’s this tight with my fingers, how does…good fucking God, (Y/N), you’re fucking perfect.” He picks up his speed a little, and you feel that knot tying deep in your stomach.
“Whatever you do, don’t fucking change anything,” you practically whimper the words out, rocking your hips in time with his hand. Your walls clamp down on his fingers, and you let out a loud moan, your nails digging into his wrist as he continues his work between your legs.
Once overstimulation sets in, you close your thighs around him until he gets the hint that you’re done. He gently removes himself from your panties and settles your shorts back in the proper spot. You pant while he kisses your neck.
“I feel like everything makes sense now,” he mutters.
“What do you mean?”
“Why people are so obsessed with sex. I get it.”
“You haven’t even had sex yet.” You chuckle and turn toward him. “Um, you can stay if you want to, but don’t feel like you have to. I know you have class tomorrow.”
“I definitely would, but I for sure came in my pants. So I’ve gotta go home and change.” He pauses and wets his lips. “If you come with me, you could stay at mine.”
“Chenle, that…” you trail off with a sigh. “That sounds like we’d be crossing a friendship line, you know?”
“Oh. Yeah, of course. Don’t even worry about it, I don’t know what’s normal in these situations, so I’ll…just go home. And I’ll see you tomorrow, right? Normal time?” His cheeks are stained pink as he lifts himself off your mattress.
You nod, frowning to yourself—you don’t want him to leave. You want him to lay next to you all night, and no part of that sounds like a good idea.
“Have a good night, Chenle.” You clasp your hands together in your lap.
“You, too.” And then he’s gone, and you fall back against your mattress.
You won’t get him out of your brain any time soon, but at the very least, you hope it’s not going to make everything awkward between the two of you. He wanted lessons, plural, so you can only think that means he’ll want to have real sex. More than once.
You grab your pillow and put it over your face, screaming into it.
This, you fear, is only the beginning.
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“Chenle, it’s been two hours. Please put the book down. I can’t think anymore today.” You rest your head back on the wall.
“You’ve got a test coming up,” he mentions as he gives you a pointed look. “If you don’t do well, that’s a direct reflection on me.”
“Mm, no. I think it’s a reflection of me not being able to shove all of this in my brain.” You drop your head in your hands.
He stops for a moment, and then ultimately decides to close the book. “Maybe I should come earlier tomorrow?”
Without another thought, you rest your head on his shoulder and sigh. He tenses for a brief second, but quickly relaxes. Neither of you are quite used to the physical affection aspect, but after last night, you’re not too sure you have to hold back anymore.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
“My brain hurts.”
“I’m serious.”
“Me, too,” you reassure him. “If there was something wrong, I’d tell you.”
“C’mere.” He wraps his arm around you and pulls you closer to him, all before resting his head on top of yours.
You shouldn’t enjoy it. In fact, you should be encouraging him to do the exact opposite of this, but, for some reason, you crave his comfort. Your day was unnaturally long, and with a test coming up, you need all of the support you can get.
“I know I’m not Jisung, but you can talk to me about anything, you know.” His voice rumbles quietly, and he reaches up to play with your hair.
“We shouldn’t be this close right now,” you say.
“I know.” He sighs.
Your heart twists in your chest. Both of you are fully aware of what all of this could mean—of the risk you’re taking by opening up a connection like this—but at the same time, neither of you are moving to change it.
“And it’d…be wrong to kiss you, wouldn’t it?” Chenle taps his fingers on your arm. “Because we only do that during…I don’t know, whatever you want to call them. Lessons?”
Fuck, you want to kiss him, too.
“I…I think we make the rules.” You lift your head to lean toward him. “Besides, maybe you could use another lesson. Do you want that?”
“I haven’t stopped thinking about you,” he admits. “But I don’t want you to think that’s all I’m doing here.”
You close the distance, pressing your lips to his. He puts his hand on the back of your head and sighs into your kiss. You shift closer to him. With your full attention on him, you drag you hand down his chest, down, down, down—
Your front door opening sends the two of you flying apart, and you curse under your breath. Chenle gets up from your bed, but not without kissing you one last time. You hate how fucking giddy it makes you feel.
“(Y/N), are you asleep with your lights on?” Jisung’s voice carries from the living room.
“It’s almost 10 o’clock,” Chenle mutters to you.
The two of you walk out together, and Jisung glances between you and Chenle, then down at his phone to look at the time.
“Chenle’s still here.”
“Yeah, we were studying. I have a test on Friday.” You cross your arms over your chest. “I think we fell asleep for a little bit.”
“Huh.”
���I was actually just leaving.” He almost reaches out to touch you, but opts against it and nods at you instead. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
You watch Chenle leave, and you know you’re in for a long conversation with Jisung. Rubbing your eyes, you head into your kitchen to get some water, and as soon as you take a sip, of course, Jisung opens his mouth.
“I think he’s a virgin.”
You nearly spit out your water. “What the fuck, Sungs?”
“Just in case you were thinking about doing anything with him.”
“First of all, why would him being a virgin matter? And second of all, why are you even thinking of me thinking about wanting to do something with him?”
Jisung looks you up and down. “You fell asleep, huh?”
“What?”
“Dude, look at you. Your hair’s messy, it looks like you spent an hour biting his lips, be so for real right now.” He scoffs and shakes his head. “Just be gentle with him when you break his heart. I like him.”
“I’m not—Jisung, for the love of God, I don’t plan on banging him.”
“You’re such a liar. I know you too well. But I’ll let you live in your land of delusion.”
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When you passed your exam (with flying colors), you hadn’t expected Chenle to show up to your house that weekend. He showed up with Thai food, a bottle of wine, and a smile to rival the entire sky full of stars outside your window.
“You passed.”
“What’s all this for?” You chuckle as you close the door behind him before following him into your kitchen. “It was just a test.”
“Just a test,” he tsks, narrowing his eyes at you. “You’ve been studying for it for weeks.”
“If you’re gonna drink, I’m not letting you drive home,” you say.
He turns to your cabinet and grabs out a couple wine glasses. “Is that okay with you?”
You nod, opening the bag he brought. Somehow, he’d gotten so comfortable here in your apartment that he was aware where you kept things. He knew what kind of Thai food you like, and if you were to taste it right now, you’d be willing to bet he knew the exact spice level you liked. He hasn’t acted weird at all since last weekend, and you’re beginning to wonder if you’re the problem. If the only reason all of these things are ‘weird’ because you’re making them that way. He seems perfectly content living whatever way the two of you have been for months now.
“Are you okay?” he asks as he fills the glasses with red liquid.
“Yeah, of course.” You accept one from him and bring it up to your lips. “Are you—Did you know you know where everything is in my apartment?”
He chuckles and scrunches his nose. “I wouldn’t say I know where everything is. But we study here all the time, so I think it’s natural to learn those things. Plus, I’m a fast learner.”
His words take you right back to last week, to him being in your bed with you, and you know damn well he’s right. Fast learner, indeed.
“I…I didn’t ask if I could do all of this, though.” Realization dawns on him as he takes in everything sprawled out on the counter. “I’m sorry, I should’ve. Honestly, I was just proud of you for passing because you’ve been working so hard. I never would do something with the intention of—”
“You ramble when you’re nervous.” You tilt your head at him.
“Long story short, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” you tell him, putting your hand on his. “It’s sweet. I appreciate it, really.”
The two of you share normal, everyday conversation while you eat, and thankfully, the awkwardness fades away. You two easily finish the bottle of wine, and once you’re both done, you’re exhausted.
“You can stay with me,” you tell him. “Unless you’d be more comfortable on the couch.”
He shakes his head and follows you into your bedroom. Considering how much time he spends in there, you expect it to feel more natural to crawl into bed with him. The gentle buzz of the wine in your veins calms you, but when he’s finally next to you and you’re curling into his chest, you fear even that can’t save you from the inherent danger of the situation you’re putting yourself in.
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You’ll never forget the look on his face when he first sees you naked. Nor will you forget the power it sent raging through your bloodstream. You’re straddling his lap, your mouth gently working on his as his hands explore over your back.
“Are you sure?” you ask breathlessly. “This isn’t something you can take back, you know.”
“I trust you completely. I want you.” Chenle nods as he drags his nails gently along your bare skin.
You grab the condom wrapper next to you and open it, your heart pounding in your chest as you roll it on him. His breath catches in his throat as you grip him to line him up with your entrance.
“Okay. We’re gonna do this.”
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He grips your hips to stop you from moving. “Don’t do this if you’re gonna regret it, (Y/N).”
“Like I could ever regret anything I do with you.” Humor laces in your tone, but he seems to understand it’s not a joke.
“Okay,” he whispers, loosening his hold on you.
You sink down slowly so as to not overwhelm him. His lips part and his brows furrow as you take him deeper. You stop to give yourself a second to adjust. The look on his face has shivers running up and down your spine, and all you want to do is move.
“This is…” he trails off, gulping.
“What?” You’re finally completely seated on his lap, gasps escaping you as you fight every urge inside you. “What is this, Lele?”
You’re halfway certain you see his eyes roll.
“I’ve never felt anything like this before,” he mutters and rubs up and down your thigh. “You…fuck, this feels…good.”
“I’m gonna start moving, okay?”
“Please.”
You watch closely as you lift up and slide back down, refusing to let your eyes flutter shut for even a moment. He inhales sharply through his teeth. It’s been a good amount of time since you’ve done this, and something about knowing the man beneath you is Chenle spurs you further.
He bites down hard on his bottom lip, digging his nails into you. “I—I can’t—”
“Don’t hold back for me,” you scold him. “It’s okay to cum first.”
“Too fast.” He shakes his head, his words practically slurred together. “You’re more important.”
“Do you know how unlikely it is that I’ll cum first in, like, the first few times—”
“You arguing is helping a little bit.” His gaze flicks up to the ceiling and then down to where the two of you are connected. “Or not. Fuck.”
“Worry about feeling it first before you think about stamina.” You roll your hips, smirking as he inhales sharply.
“I am…feeling a whole lot of things right now.” He allows his touch to trail down to your ass. When he squeezes, it causes you to lift up, and the friction has his head falling back against the wall with a thud.
“Good God, be careful,” you scold him.
“To be honest, I’m not too worried about this head.” He lets out a breathless laugh. “I’m good. You can move.”
“You can stop me if it’s too much,” you remind him.
He nods, chewing on his bottom lip as he waits for you to continue. You’re almost embarrassed by the sounds of your wetness when you lift up, but seeing him clench his jaw and the slightest eye roll puts you on a little bit of a power trip. You set a steady but slow pace, biting back your own moans so you can pay attention to him. It’s like a whine leaves his mouth every time your walls take him completely.
You pull him back to you so your chest presses against his and you wrap your arms over his shoulders. He leans in to kiss you without hesitation, his lips slotting against yours perfectly. You swipe your tongue along his bottom lip, and his moan allows you entrance. That sound turns into a whine, and you know he’s close. He desperately reaches between the two of you, his thumb swiping over your clit. The shock from the move has your back arching, and your walls squeeze around his cock.
His hips jolt up, slamming his tip deep inside you as his face contorts in pleasure. With his nails digging into your thighs, he pants, chest heaving.
“God damn it,” he groans.
“I’ve never seen anyone so upset about cumming.”
“I feel like I’m already behind. The least I can do is be good at it.” He runs his hands down his face. “You didn’t even—”
“This isn’t about me,” you remind him.
He frowns. “Uh, yes it is. I’m literally inside you right now. That means it’s definitely about you, too.”
“Lele, relax. You’ll get better with time.” You press a kiss to his cheek and shakily lift yourself off him.
He catches you off guard by pulling you back, and the next thing you know, your back is against your mattress, and his fingers trace shapes on your thighs.
“Haven’t you learned how competitive I am yet?” He runs his tongue over his teeth. “Can I?”
You’re not a hundred percent sure exactly what he’s referring to, but you nod anyway. When he kisses you, it’s soft and sweet, almost distracting enough to make it hard for you to realize how close his fingers dance to your core.
“One day you’ll cum with me inside you,” he whispers into your mouth. “The fucking lengths I’d go to.”
He wastes no time in sliding two fingers in. Your back arches into him, and you hold the back of his head to keep his lips on yours.  He didn’t lie when he said he was a fast learner—you told him how to make sure you feel good too one time and he fucking ran with it. With his thumb on your clit, he kisses down your neck. You have no idea what’s happening to you, but you’ve never been like this with anyone. Maybe it’s because you trust him, too.
His lips wrap around your nipple and the world comes crashing down around you as pleasure sparks over your skin. You gasp and dig your nails into his skin. When your senses come back, he’s pulling his fingers out of you and moving up to kiss you again, the softness of his movements making you sigh all over again.
“(Y/N), I think I—” he cuts himself off, wetting his lips.
Your heart stops in your chest when you hear his tone, and half of you wants to ask him to continue. The other knows damn well you shouldn’t.
“I…don’t really know what to do with the condom.”
You can’t stop yourself from laughing, but you tell him the proper disposal method. When he comes back, he pulls your comforter back and helps you under it before climbing in next to you.
“Is it okay if I stay?” he asks softly. “If it’s weird, I can go.”
“Don’t.” You shake your head, shuffling closer. “It feels right.”
“Yeah, it does.” His voice is so soft, you barely hear it. He presses his lips to the top of your head, leaving them there for a moment longer than necessary, and then he inhales deeply. You drift off to sleep before you fully feel him exhale.
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Despite the obvious, you hadn’t expected Chenle to be completely normal in all other circumstances. He hasn’t touched you excessively in front of other people. When you’re focusing on studying, he doesn’t try to make a move on you. Over the course of two weeks, you’d spent most of those nights with him, teaching him all there is to know about female anatomy.
He didn’t lie about being a fast learner. You find yourself looking forward to the moments where you’re alone with him, where you get to be tangled up in sheets and forget the rest of the world exists.
There have been a few times where he’d gotten you close to finishing first, but much to his frustration, he still couldn’t hold back.
You’d convinced him to go to Jaemin’s party while he was in the middle of kissing your neck. And as a thank you, you’d shown him the wonders of a blowjob. By the time he’s ready for a relationship, you’re sure he’ll have nothing to worry about.
Except, you do. Because the thought of him dating someone else after spending this time with you has an unsettling feeling stirring in your stomach.
You ignore it the best way you know how—by talking to someone else you’ll pretend to entertain. Sitting between Jeno and Chenle’s friend Mark, you laugh along to whatever they’re talking about. Truth be told, you have no fucking clue what that may be, but they’re encouraged by you.
Chenle sits across from you, trying his best not to stare. He nurses his drink and talks to Jisung, but his attention is never truly off you. The second Jeno’s hand comes in contact with your thigh, Chenle abruptly stands from his seat and practically stomps out without a word to anyone.
You frown at Jisung, who shrugs. He’s not much help after he’s been drinking. With a sigh, you get up and follow him wherever he may have gone. You see the top of his head as he makes his way toward the door through the crowd.
He makes it outside and down the porch steps before you catch up to him and grab his wrist.
“Let me go.” His voice is colder than you’ve ever heard it.
“What the hell is your problem?” you snap.
He whirls around, eyes wide and full of something you can’t make out. “I get you can still do whatever—whoever—you want, but right in front of me? Do you have any idea how fucking—God, it’s embarrassing.”
“Oh, now you’re embarrassed of me?” You scoff.
“Not for you. For me.” He most likely has no clue he’s shouting, but his breath leaves a frigid cloud in the air. “Am I not good enough for you?”
“Chenle, keep your fucking voice down,” you hiss.
He sucks in a shaky breath. “How? I—I don’t know how to handle any of this. We agreed it doesn’t…mean much, but doesn’t it fucking mean something?”
Your heart trembles in your chest, and you gulp. How do you respond to that? Of course, it means something, but what that is, you’re unsure of. How do you tell him that?
“Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?” he asks, exasperated.
You recoil, frowning as you take him in.
“Go ahead and fuck Jeno, (Y/N). It’s not my business, right? I have no reason to be upset. At the very least, just act like you care about me a little bit, alright? I don’t want to see you…want someone else.”
“I do care,” you say quickly, grabbing his wrist. “It’s not like that, okay?”
“So, what is it?” he breathes out, a short laugh escaping his throat. “Are you tired of teaching me? You want someone who’s better?”
“Stop.”
“What the hell else am I supposed to think? Will I ever be enough for you—”
“I said stop.” You don’t mean to yell, not really, but as soon as the words leave your mouth, you slap a hand over it.
Chenle flinches, realization quickly dawning on his face. “I’m sorry. God, I don’t know what the fuck that was, and it’s definitely not my place to tell you—”
“Just stop,” you say weakly, blinking back the tears welling in your eyes. “Don’t do this to me.”
“Fuck, don’t cry. Please.” He steps forward and wraps his arms around you. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean any of that shit. You don’t owe me anything, okay? We both know that and we both know you’re doing me a fucking favor, so I’m gonna be better, I promise. I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”
“Maybe we should stop.” You wipe at your eyes.
“What? Why?”
“I don’t think you’re being honest with me, Lele.” You sniffle. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”
“(Y/N), I—I’m drunk, for fuck’s sake. And, yeah, I’m a fucking idiot who tried to…control you and what you do with your body, and that’s so messed up. I’m really sorry for that. But honestly, it’s pride and ego. It felt like I wasn’t…like I don’t give you what you need, so you’ve gotta find it from someone else. That’s all.”
“I wanna go home.”
“Okay, we can go—”
“You need to go home, too.” You look down at your feet. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to stay with me tonight.”
“Don’t do this—”
“It’s one night. You need to respect what I’m asking for.”
He stares at you with wide, concerned eyes.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? I think you should go back in there with Jisung, and he’ll make sure you get home in one piece.”
“(Y/N)...”
“Goodnight, Chenle.”
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Being alone in your house makes you regret your decision to send him home. You barely drank at all, so you can’t blame any of your emotions on the alcohol content in your bloodstream. God, how do you describe what the fuck is going on inside you?
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Chenle keeps his distance from you for a few days. You and Jisung are splitting some drinks in his apartment when he decides to bring it up, analyzing you for your reaction as he speaks.
“Did something happen with you and Chenle?”
“Why do you think that?” You take a giant sip of your drink, cringing at the taste.
“Don’t do that. I was being nice. I know something happened because I saw you guys argue outside the party, and he’s been a miserable lump for four days now.” Jisung crosses his arms over his chest. “You hurt his feelings.” 
“I don’t want to talk about Chenle.”
“And what if you fail physics, dude?”
“Jisung, fuck physics.” You drop your head into your palms. “I invited you over to drink and not think about the real world. So if you’re going to bring him up, please just go home.”
“Oh.” Jisung pauses, slowly leaning forward until his elbows are braced on his knees. “(Y/N).”
“No, Jisung. No. I just…want peace, okay? I can’t do this right now.” You shake your head.
“Alright.” Jisung stands. “I’ll leave you alone. But we’ll talk about this tomorrow.”
You don’t say a word as he leaves, but you do chug the rest of what’s in your can. Chenle hasn’t so much as texted you. Why would you want to talk about him? Doesn’t Jisung know how royally fucked everything is between the two of you. Instead of going to bed like you should, you sit on your couch and stare up at your ceiling, occasionally pausing to take a sip of the new drink you opened. By the time your door opens again, you think you’re dreaming. You see Chenle in front of you, and in your hazy mind, you want nothing more than to touch his ethereal, angelic face.
“Hey,” he whispers. “Are you okay?”
You groan, sniffling.
“C’mon, you gotta get some sleep.” His words make your head whirl even more.
“Lele?”
“Yeah?”
“You’re real?”
“Yeah, baby, I’m real.” His voice sinks into your skin, and you lean into him immediately.
“Help.” You hold your hands out to him.
He loops his arm around your waist and guides you into your bedroom. “How much did you drink?”
“Not a lot,” you mutter, your words slurring together. “I’ve had more.”
He scoffs. “You’re ridiculous.”
You flop into your bed, and you swear your sheets still smell like him. He should be tangled up with you every night, holding you close to him like you’re the only thing that matters. You should be. The only thing. Chenle hesitates before climbing in next to you.
“I don’t want to stop,” you whisper as his chest settles against your back. “We’re both fucking stupid if we want other people.”
“Sh.” He makes the gesture so softly, you almost miss it. “We’ll talk tomorrow, baby. Get some sleep.”
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You wake to lips on your shoulder. Shuffling closer to Chenle, you groan at the brightness of the sun.
“Careful,” he mutters, squeezing his arm around your waist.
“What time is it?”
“Ten.”
“What?” You attempt to shoot up in bed, but you groan and slump back in your spot. “Fuck. Don’t we have class?”
“We had class, yeah.” Chenle tightens his grip around you and traces shapes on your hip. “I didn’t want to leave you alone.”
You remember Chenle telling you he’d never missed a class in his life. How he’d always known how important every single lesson was, and how he’d never miss for something unimportant.
“I’m sorry,” you tell him.
He frowns. “What for?”
“I did it on purpose. Well, not really. But I was trying to distance myself from you because we were…I don’t know, spending a lot of time together. It was fucking weird.”
“Do you not want that?” he asks.
“I do. And it’s weird that I do.” You bury yourself in his chest. “Can we forget everything today? I just want you.”
“Of course,” he whispers. “That sounds perfect.”
His arms wrap around you, a deep hum escaping him as he rests his head on top of yours. You breathe him in. You wonder what it’ll take to get through your own confusion, and if it’s even worth dragging him along with you. His fingertips comb through your hair. And for the first time in weeks, the only movement between the two of you is steady breathing.
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A few more days pass, and the two of you haven’t resumed despite agreeing not to stop. You assume he’s too awkward to ask, and he’s awaiting your nudge to tell him it’s okay. But you realized that part of him gaining confidence is about letting him figure it out.
You’re sitting on your couch with his head in your lap, fingers sifting through his hair as the TV plays quietly in front of you. A lot of time spent with him feels oddly domestic. You’ve never let Jisung lay on you like this, so what exactly is the extent of what’s running through your mind?
He shifts on his back, grabbing your hand. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
He sits up and faces you, gaze traveling over you briefly. “Are we…You said you wanted to stop, and then you said you didn’t want to stop. And we never talked about it. So, please don’t think I’m trying to pressure you or anything, but I think it’s worth a conversation.”
“You’re right.” You cross your legs and turn toward him. “What the hell was all of that?”
“I really don’t know. Like, logically, you weren’t doing anything to spite me, but it just…felt like I’d never be good enough. Not just for you but for anyone. It wasn’t fair of me to take that out on you, and you’re obviously more than welcome to do whatever the hell you want with your body.”
“What part of you isn’t good enough?”
He sighs and clasps his hands together. “C’mon, (Y/N), I haven’t been able to make you finish first. And you can say whatever you want, but it’s gotta be frustrating—”
“Chenle.” You shuffle closer to him. “If it were frustrating, do you really think I’d keep going back for more? You still take the time to make sure I’m good, even if it’s not before you, which is more than what a lot of guys can say. Relax.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t know why that’s immediately where I went when I saw that guy touch you. To be honest, I’ve never…felt anything like that before. And it scared me, so I figured it’d be better to leave.” He picks at the seam of his jeans.
“Is it okay if I kiss you?” you ask.
Chenle nods, glancing down at your lips. You give him a small smile before leaning in and pressing your mouth to his. He sighs as if he’s melting into you, and his hand moves to the back of your head.
“I missed this,” he murmurs.
“Me, too,” you admit.
No matter how much you want to, you don’t push further. You wait for him to make that decision. He pulls away briefly as if to analyze you, and then he moves back in with determination. Without a word, you allow him to guide you until your back is against the couch cushions.
You throw your arm around his shoulders and pull him closer. With a gentle roll of his hips, his clothed length presses against you. He kisses down your neck, gently nipping at your skin. Finally, he lifts up to press his lips to your ear.
“You know, people radiate more thermally per volume than the sun.” His hand trails down your body, slipping into your shorts to cup your core over your panties. “And you’ve got me fucking addicted to you, for fuck’s sake.”
“Did you just tell me a physics fact right now?” You quirk an eyebrow at him.
He grins. “Yeah, I did. It felt like it fit the situation.”
“It’s so fucking weird that I found that hot.” And then you pull him back into a kiss while you roll against his hand.
“Oh, good.” He moves your panties aside and slides his fingers along your entrance. “Can I go down on you?”
“Huh?” Your eyes shoot open and you grab his wrist.
“You’ve gone down on me, but I’ve never…” He gulps and nudges your clit with his fingertips. “Do you not want me to?”
“I’m just…shocked.” You let out a shaky breath as he circles you. “That you want to.”
“I want anything that’ll make you feel good.” He pulls at the hem of your panties, only to let them smack back against your skin.
“You know I’m not gonna say no.” You lift your hips to encourage him to undress you.
He smirks and removes his hand from your core. “I like to hear you want me.”
“Can you do me a favor?” You trace along his bottom lip, entranced in the thought of his head between your thighs.
“Anything.”
“Keep the glasses on when you do it.”
He raises an eyebrow, but you’re quickly distracted by the way he tugs your shorts and panties off in one movement. You’re not sure where the determination on his face comes from—or the confidence and knowledge—but he starts by pressing open mouthed kisses around your inner thigh.
“You’re so pretty everywhere,” he mutters, tongue running along your skin.
You let your head drop back against the couch and reach to card your fingers through his hair. He hums into you as he trails closer and closer to your core. You usually try to refrain from squirming too much or letting him know just how fucking needy you are, but the thought of his lips on you is driving you up the fucking wall.
“Lele, don’t tease me,” you whine, shifting so you can see him.
His gaze flicks up, a look within you’ve never seen before. You did something to him, and you’re more than ready to find out. He narrows his eyes slightly as he analyzes you before he dips his head back down. His tongue starts at your entrance, and he flattens it and moves upward until he takes your clit in his mouth.
You gasp, wanting nothing more than to throw your head back, but you refuse—you need to see him. He sucks on your bud and flicks it with his tongue, and you grip his hair.
“I didn’t fucking teach you that,” you say breathlessly, chest heaving.
He pulls away just long enough to say, “Porn isn’t completely useless now, is it?”
You’re dazed already, watching as he pleasures you. He moans against you, and the vibrations course through you. You’re not sure what made you ask him to keep the glasses on, but you’re appreciating it now more than ever—he’s between your legs with his face buried in the very apex of your thighs, and every time you squirm, you feel the thick frames of his glasses.
“Fingers,” you tell him. “Fuck, use your fingers.”
He doesn’t let up, immediately listening and thrusting two inside you. Your back arches as you moan and push him further against you. Everything becomes a blur, and when he curls his fingers just the way you taught him, you’re practically thrashing beneath him.
A strangely masculine scream robs your body of the high you were two seconds away from, and Chenle freezes and lifts himself to cover a bit more of you. Embarrassment floods through your body.
“What the fuck?” Jisung shouts, hands slapped over his eyes. “(Y/N), I sit on that couch!”
“That’s really what you’re worried about?” You scoff and grab the throw blanket from the back. Chenle helps you spread it out so he can safely move away from his spot. You cover him, too, considering the noticeable bulge in his pants.
“You should save all sexual activity for your bedroom—”
“Says the guy who was telling me how he fucked a girl on the kitchen counter,” you shoot back. “We’re covered.”
He drops his hands from his eyes and shivers like this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to him.
“I’m gonna puke. Chenle, wipe your fucking mouth.” Jisung clenches his eyes shut and shakes his head. “What the fuck?”
Chenle’s ears turn pink, and he uses the blanket to remove what’s left of your arousal from his face. Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you study him—
“My God, are you gonna eat him alive?” Jisung scolds you. “Right in front of me? I can’t believe you guys didn’t tell me you’re together.”
You and Chenle exchange glances before you both look back at Jisung.
“No. No, no, no.” He drops his head into his hands. “You mean to tell me you’re not?”
“Can we do this later?” you ask.
“What?”
“I agree,” Chenle adds. “You should come back in like an hour. Or two. Because to be honest, I don’t really care if you’re here or not, I’m gonna fuck her.”
Everything inside you heats up again, and you gape at Chenle. Jisung lets out a dramatic scream and slams the door behind him.
“What the hell was that?” You push Chenle’s shoulder.
“The truth,” he says. “I want you so fucking bad right now.”
“Well, you’d better hurry up and put this extra time to good use.” You lean forward and kiss him hard, holding onto the back of his neck. He inhales sharply but wastes no time in reciprocating. With one quick movement, the blanket once covering you is tossed to the floor, and he’s between your legs.
While his mouth works against yours, he almost frantically moves his hands beneath your shirt and only breaks where you’re connected to pull it off. His urgency takes you off-guard, but you can’t deny the thrill running through your veins and the wetness rushing to your core.
You grab at his shirt, and he sits up on his knees to take it off. Practically lunging forward, you unbutton his pants. As soon as his zipper’s down, he grabs your wrist.
“Turn around.”
“Huh?” you ask.
“Turn around,” he repeats. “You know what I want.”
With anyone else, you’d be embarrassed by how much his request turned you on. You flip over and lift yourself to your knees. You arch your back and let your head rest against the couch cushion, and his groan reverberates through your entire being.
His hands grip your ass, nails digging in as he squeezes hard. “Do you have any fucking idea how bad I wanted you to cum on my tongue?”
“Was pretty close.” You push back against him.
“Think he’s listening?” Chenle asks, tapping your hip before flattening his palm over your stomach. “Just a little curious about us, huh?”
His touch burns against you in the best ways, and after being as close as you were, you’re desperate for him to make you finish. You cry out when he puts two fingers on your clit and rubs slow circles. Gripping onto the cushion below you, you rock your hips in rhythm with him.
“You said you’re on birth control, right?” he murmurs, seemingly distracted by the way your arousal coats his skin.
You nod fervently.
“Is…” He pauses, cursing under his breath. “No condom is okay? I can, um, finish inside you?”
Your eyes roll back. “Fuck, of course, you can. I need you right now.”
He shuffles behind you, and you wish you could see what he was doing. His fingers slow, but your whine is cut short when he slides his length against you to collect the wetness.
“A-and there’s…no risk?” He gulps.
“C’mon, you little science nerd, you know there’s always a risk.” You chuckle airly. “That’s part of what makes it fun.”
He hums and removes his fingers from you, grabbing his cock and jerking himself off a few times before lining up with your entrance.
“You’re sure this is okay, baby?” Chenle’s free hand squeezes your ass again.
“For fuck’s sake, Lele, please—” You’re cut off by his tip ever so slowly stretching you to accommodate him. You gasp, immediately pushing back to take more of him. This angle has you seeing stars. Once he bottoms out, he lets out a long moan.
“So good,” he whines, just barely rocking his hips. “You’re so fucking good.”
He reaches around you again to circle your clit, and then he starts to thrust. Your eyes roll and your body melts, everything around you becoming blurry as he sets a steady pace that has your toes curling.
You attempt to assist him, every time he’s entering you, you push back to take him harder. One hand grips your hip, and the other frantically works between your legs. You can’t even think straight, moans pouring out in unison with his. A knot starts to form in your stomach, and you attempt to shut your thighs.
“‘M close.” You gasp, legs beginning to shake. “Fuck, ‘m gonna—”
You let out your loudest moan yet as you spasm around him, overwhelmed from the pleasure. Sensitivity sets in quickly, but you need him to cum inside you. He lets out a high pitched noise, and the next thing you know, he’s pressing his hips against you, burying himself as deep as he can to fill you with his load.
Both of you pant, unable to move for a moment. Once he regains some of his composure, he slowly pulls out of you, sighing at the feeling. He turns you on your back and kisses you slow, his lips working to part yours as he slides his tongue in.
You smile, unable to hold it back when you think of how much he’s learned in such a short period of time.
“You did it,” you tease him.
“That was the best fucking feeling in the world,” he tells you. “I’m never cumming first again.”
You laugh and push at his shoulder. “That’s not really something you get to just manifest into the universe.”
“Maybe not.” He shrugs, sheepishly grinning at you. “You want new clothes?”
“It’d be really great if you could grab me a towel, actually.”
“A towel?” He frowns.
“You see, Lele, when you fuck raw, messes occur.” You chuckle. “That’s a good thought for the future. Aftercare includes towels.”
“The future?” He quirks an eyebrow.
“I just meant—” Your face heats up. “Like, whoever you end up with. It’s important.”
“Right.” The playful gleam on his face fades, and as he leans back to get up and retrieve what you need, he stops to stare at the apex of your thighs. “It comes out.”
You slap a hand over your mouth to stop the abrupt laugh. “Yes, it does. What did you think happened? It magically gets absorbed into vagina land?”
“Well…yeah.” He shrugs, wetting his lips. “But this is so much hotter. I might get hard again.”
“You psycho, go get a towel.” You push at him, and he bursts into laughter as he tucks himself back in his boxers and jeans before heading toward your bathroom.
When he comes back, he helps you clean up. His touch is tender, gentle, and it makes you want to wrap him up in your blankets and stay in your bed all day with him. He grabs the throw blanket from the floor, lays down on top of you, and rests his head on your chest. You hum in content and run your fingers through his hair.
You’re not sure how long the two of you stay like that, but you find yourself drifting off to sleep. Just before you do, a phone vibrates on the coffee table. Chenle groans.
“Who’s is it?” you ask.
He lifts his head to look. “Mine. The one time it actually rings—should I just ignore it?”
“No, it’s okay.” You sigh and rub your eyes. “Answer.”
He kisses your forehead before getting up. After he has the blanket on you again, he reaches for his phone and answers it.
“Yeah?”
As soon as the other person speaks, he tenses and sits straight up.
“That was today? Are you still there? I’m so sorry, I can be there in fifteen minutes if that works.” He pauses and massages his forehead. “Yeah, I understand. It won’t happen again.”
After a few more moments of listening, Chenle hangs up the phone. He curses and reaches down to grab his shirt from the floor. When he turns to you, you’re watching him with a concerned look on your face.
“One of my professors assigned a group project, and we were supposed to present today. Like…twenty minutes ago. It’s literally twenty percent of my fucking grade.” Despite his anxious energy, he gives you a gentle kiss. “I’m so sorry, babe, I’ll come back later, okay?”
You don’t have time to answer, because he grabs his wallet and keys and bolts out the door. Not that you would’ve been able to anyway—shock courses through you at the pet name. Sure, he says things during sex, but the two of you have never…nicknamed each other outside of that.
You sit up in confusion and scratch the top of your head. What the fuck is going on with you and Chenle?
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After you shower and get dressed, you go over to Jisung’s. You’re glad Chenle won’t have to sit through this. When you’re on Jisung’s couch with a bowl of popcorn, he begins his in-depth interview.
“You’re not dating?”
“Nope.”
“Then what are you doing?”
“Jisung,” you deadpan. “I think it’s pretty obvious. He’s helping me with physics, and I’m helping him—”
“Did he say you had to—”
“Park Jisung, this is Chenle you’re talking about. You really think he’s capable of something like that?” You put another handful of popcorn in your mouth.
“Fine. Then tell me how it started. I can’t believe you’ve kept this from me. Your best friend. I tell you when I hook up with people.” He frowns at you.
“Well, one day, we were doing physics homework.”
“Wow, so sexy.”
“Shut up.” You send a glare his way. “Anyway, he was telling me about the ever-expanding universe or whatever, and…like, when he gets super passionate about something, he’s attractive. Like more than usual, you know? So, I asked him why he hadn’t ever dated anyone before.”
“And then you banged him?” Jisung purses his lips. “That’s…well, to be fair, I kind of expected that portion of it.”
You flip him off. “No, that’s not how it happened. Just listen, would you?”
“Fine, fine.” He holds his hands up in mock surrender.
“He said he didn’t have any prospects so obviously I was like…be for real, dude. He’s…attractive, you know? And then he said he was busy, and then I asked what about hooking up with people? Because you can still hook up and not date.”
“That kinda sounds like he was making excuses for not wanting to date.”
“Yeah, maybe. But he was also a virgin.”
“What?” Jisung’s jaw drops, and he drags his hands down his face. “(Y/N), are you insane? He’s probably unhealthily obsessed with you—”
“He showed up the next day and asked me to…teach him how to have sex. And I’d been dickless for…shit, months at least, so of course, I said yes.” You purse your lips and stare down at your lap. “He’s still learning.”
“When was this?”
“Um…” you hesitate, fidgeting with your fingers. “Remember that party where you said you saw us all angry and stuff?”
“Yeah?”
“Like, a few weeks before that.”
“Holy fucking shit, (Y/N), you’ve been fucking him for that long?” Your best friend lets out an exasperated sigh. “You realize he’s in love with you, right?”
Your head shoots up and you stare at the man on the couch. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“I’m sorry, but no dude like him is gonna be able to stop himself from falling in love with a girl he’s been fucking for months. Guys are really oddly attached to their firsts, you know. And that reaction at the party. He’s been missing classes. It’s like you’ve taken over his whole life.”
The rose-colored glasses shatter, and you recall what happened just hours before. He’d missed the presentation of his project. Your throat closes in on itself and you slap a hand to your forehead. Sure, you asked him to tell you if he was starting to catch feelings, but you should’ve known better than to think he’d even realize it before it was too late.
“If you don’t even have a smidge of feelings for him, you’ve gotta stop all of this. For his sake.” Jisung moves over to you so he can give you a supportive hug. “You know he deserves someone who will love him.”
“He’s not in love with me,” you say quickly. “I’ll prove it to you. You’ll see at the party this weekend. He’ll pull some random girl.”
“Sure…” he trails off. “We’ll see, I guess.”
You don’t want to stop.
That’s the only thing whirling through your head when Chenle tells you he’s on his way back to you. Your nerves churn until you’re sick to your stomach, but there’s not a damn thing you can do to change it. He’d never tell you if he got feelings for you. You should’ve known better than to expect that from him. After all, you guys spend nearly every day together, and you don’t have sex all of those days. Or learn physics. Sometimes, the two of you just lay on your bed together, your head buried in his neck, legs tangled until you don’t know which ones are yours anymore.
If he doesn’t put up a fight, it means Jisung was wrong. And that also means you don’t have to distance yourself. If he does…
“(Y/N)?” His voice carries from your living room.
“In here,” you call out to him.
Chenle’s footsteps are barely audible as he makes his way over to you. His form takes up the door frame, where he pauses to study you. He lets his backpack fall from his shoulder, and then he’s climbing onto your bed. With a long sigh, he finds his spot next to you and wraps his arm around your middle.
“That bad?” you ask.
He shakes his head. “I just can’t believe I forgot that.”
You pause for a moment, and the two of you are cascaded into a blanket of silence. He must sense the awkwardness in the air, given the way he gulps and his heart rate speeds up. You lean back to get a good view of his face.
“Why did you?” you ask quietly.
“What?”
“Forget. Why did you forget?”
He blinks, lips parting while he searches for something to say. “I…I don’t know. Honestly, I’ve never done something like that before. I’m glad the teacher still let me present, otherwise I would’ve lost my top spot. And I think that’s the only reason why she did.”
“And you were…okay with that?” You recoil.
“At the time, it really freaked me out.” He frowns. “But even if I lost the top spot, I’d still be in the top ten, so…(Y/N)?”
You roll away from him and out of his grasp, planting your feet on the floor. An overwhelming guilt floods you as you bury your head in your hands. The man in your bed just a couple months ago would’ve dropped dead at a statement like that. He could’ve gone on for hours about how important that spot was to him, and what the hell’s he willing to give that up for?
“Are you okay?” Chenle sits up behind you, fingertips brushing your arm.
“We have to stop.” It was supposed to come out much stronger than it did, but at least you didn’t have to look at him.
“Wha—how did that even—why?” He adjusts to sit next to you, eyebrows furrowed.
“Do you even hear yourself right now?” you snap. “What the fuck is top ten to someone like you? School has been everything to you, and you’re forgetting projects like it means nothing. Have you even been doing your work? You’re with me all the time, and the only thing you’ve been doing school wise is helping me with physics.”
“It was one time, (Y/N), okay?”
“Now you’re lying to me,” you groan in exasperation.
“I…” He gulps and turns his head away from you.
“I told you to tell me if you ever caught feelings, Chenle.” You blink back tears and chew the inside of your cheek while you await his response.
But no matter how much you wait, it doesn’t come. His hands are clasped together in his lap, and he stares down at them, inhaling shaky breaths.
“My God, you’re not even denying it.” You stand up, unable to stop yourself from pacing around the room. “This is what’s making you all complacent about school? Seriously? This is the exact reason you said you didn’t want to date. Or find someone to sleep with, because you didn’t have time—”
“I actually said it was because I hadn’t found anyone worth it,” he finally speaks up, gaze finally lifting to meet yours. “What did you expect would happen? You really thought the virgin would be able to stop himself from falling for you after everything we’ve done? I’m sorry if that’s not what you wanted, or if you wanted me to tell you, but by the time I actually realized what was happening, it was too late. I’d lose you. In all aspects, not just…whatever the hell this is.”
“You need to go.”
“After all of this, you don’t even…not even a little bit?”
You do. How do you tell him no and lie right to his face?
“I just put everything out there. The least you can do at this point is tell me if all of this only meant something to me.” Desperation tugs on his features, and he takes a step closer to you. “Did you spend every night with me and still not…”
“Stop,” you shout. “What the hell are you thinking? What is it that you want me to say? It doesn’t matter if I do or don’t have feelings for you, because I would never—”
“Date me?” he interrupts you. “Love me? What’s so bad about either of those things? I’m trying my best out here.”
“Would you let me finish?” You run your fingers through your hair. “I was going to say I would never let you give up your number one spot for any girl. Not just me. Because that’s fucking stupid. And you’re not stupid, Chenle, so you need to remember what’s actually important.”
“(Y/N), please. I can’t go back to how things were. Not when I know what all of this is like.”
“Then maybe we just don’t talk at all.” You clench your fists at your side. The idea breaks your own heart. “It’s not like we have any classes together. The only time we see each other is here anyway.”
“You haven’t denied it, either.” He’s directly in front of you now, watery eyes staring into yours. “You made a big deal of me not denying it, but you haven’t either.”
“Get out.” You point toward your door. “Leave me alone. Just go.”
Now he’s speechless, and the hurt on his face plays out right in front of you. You want to yell and scream because you’re the one causing this. You should’ve seen this coming. When he first approached you and asked you for this, you should’ve said no. If you had turned him away, things would be normal. He wouldn’t have turned complacent about the thing he once cared the most about. But what did that mean? Was it you he was willing to give it up for, or was it the freedom and new experiences you provided?
“You…what about your exam? It’s only a couple weeks before the end of the semester.”
“Don’t worry about me or my grades when you’re not even thinking of your own. Please, Chenle, just go. I’ll bring Jisung here if I have to.” You sniffle, rolling your eyes.
His jaw tightens as he glances up at the ceiling. “Fine. I…Clearly, nothing I say is gonna—yeah. I guess I’ll see you around.”
He grabs his backpack from the floor and slings it over his shoulder, and as soon as he closes the door behind him, you climb into your bed, grab the pillow he always uses, and cradle it to your chest. You don’t mean to let yourself cry, but once you start, you can’t stop.
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You barely even remembered telling Jisung that Chenle would go to the party that weekend. To be honest, you’d told him about it, but hope that he won’t come gnaws at the edges of your heart. In all honesty, you didn’t even want to go. And if your best friend hadn’t practically forced you out of bed and to get dressed, you wouldn’t have.
You and Jisung went separate ways once you arrived at Jaemin’s house. Absent-mindedly, you find yourself in the kitchen, mixing a drink. The only way you’ll get through the night is with liquor. Once you walk back towards the living room, you see Jisung standing at the corner. He grins when he notices you.
“Dude, I so thought you were fucking with me. I’ll give it to you though, I guess you were right. You must be a good tutor.” Jisung lets out an obnoxious laugh. “Didn’t think you had it in you.”
“What are you talking about?” You frown.
He nods his head in the opposite direction, and when you follow his gaze, you immediately tense. Of course, Chenle did show up. Not only that, but he’s in full-on conversation with a girl you don’t recognize. Your throat tightens, but you swiftly attempt to ignore it with a quick sip of your drink.
“Never thought he’d get there,” Jisung evaluates him. “She looks like she’s into him.”
“Great.” You try your best not to sound sarcastic.
Jisung side eyes you, but he doesn’t say anything else. He crosses his arms over his chest and proceeds to watch Chenle, but you can’t seem to bring yourself to look in his direction. Your desire to be at this party has significantly decreased, and all you want to do is walk out and forget you ever saw him here. But it doesn’t matter either way—you sent him away. You have no right to be jealous or upset that he’s doing exactly what you taught him to do. If he wants to find a girlfriend or a fling, that’s up to him. And neither option should make you upset, no matter how much you can’t deny that it very much does.
“Oh, shit,” Jisung mutters, a chuckle escaping him.
Your head shoots in Chenle’s direction, and you bristle at the sight. He whispers something in the girl’s ear, and she laughs. Your chest tightens, somewhat desperate to know what he said to her—if it was any of the things he’s ever said to you. Maybe it was something you taught him. He leans away from her, but not all the way. The smile drops from her face, and you know immediately what’s about to happen. You push your cup against Jisung’s chest until he takes it from you.
“I can’t do this.” You shake your head and bolt in the opposite direction, toward the front door. Tears well in your eyes, but they only serve to piss you off. You shouldn’t care—you told him you didn’t.
Jisung drove you, so there’s nowhere for you to go except the front porch. You sit down on the top step, head buried in your palms. Taking a deep breath, you look up in time to see Karina walking out of the house with her keys.
“Are you going home?” you ask.
“Yeah, tonight’s kinda lame.” She scans over you and purses her lips. “You want a ride? I didn’t drink.”
“Fuck, yes. Please.” You launch up and follow Karina to her car.
Thankfully, she doesn’t ask you any questions on the way to your place. As you thank her and step out of the car, she grabs your wrist.
“I think I know what’s going on.” She pauses. “If there’s something you want, (Y/N), you shouldn’t let it go. Because you’ll regret it, okay?”
You nod and gulp. “Thanks, Rina.”
She lets you go and smiles. You close the car door behind you and head up to your apartment, questioning how you let yourself get into this predicament. Why the you from a few months ago didn’t have any clue how easy it would be to fall for someone like Chenle—a man with a kind heart, who cares for you and your wellbeing. You stare at your phone like it’ll light up from his text message, but you put a decent wedge between the two of you with your last conversation. Would he even look at his phone if you texted him? Maybe he’s already taking that girl home. He may learn it wasn’t even you he fell for, but the sex. And when he has sex with another girl, he’ll figure out you’re not special, and—
“God fucking damn it,” you groan, angrily wiping at your tears. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”
Your phone vibrates, but it’s a call from Jisung. You sniffle and clear your throat before answering.
“Yeah?”
“Where the hell did you go?” he snaps.
“I’m at home,” you tell him. “Rina drove me home.”
“Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been?” Jisung’s annoyance creeps through. “You just stormed out, but I figured you’d at least tell me if you were leaving the area.”
“Sungs, I’m not really in the mood to be yelled at right now.” You can’t hide the crack in your voice.
“Are you okay?” His voice instantly softens. “Is this about—”
“Don’t. I don’t want anyone else you’re with to know. It’s humiliating, isn’t it? Teaching a man everything you know for him to use it other places.” You chuckle, staring up at your ceiling.
“You wanna tell me what happened?” Jisung sighs. “Because you clearly didn’t want him talking to that girl.”
“You’re making me sound pathetic.”
“Uh.”
“Fuck you, Park Jisung.” You roll your eyes. “You’re not helping.”
“Do you want me to come over?” he asks.
“Stay at the party. I’ll be okay.” You grab Chenle’s pillow and pull it to your chest. “Is he…did he leave?”
“He’s not with her, if that’s what you’re asking. He left. By himself. After I figured out you were gone, I kinda freaked out and there was like…a search party. He didn’t care much about her after that.”
“He’s so annoying,” you huff out. “Why couldn’t he have just…fucked that girl or something?”
“Like you wouldn’t have crumbled to dust at the literal thought of that.” Jisung scoffs. “I know you, (Y/N), and no matter what you say, there’s no way you feel absolutely nothing for him. You’re both suffering because of the denial, you know.”
“What if it’s not really me he wants? Like…what if he just likes the sex and doesn’t realize it yet?” You shake your head.
Jisung lets out a long sigh. “He’s not a child, okay? Just because he hasn’t had sex before or dated anyone doesn’t mean he doesn’t know what that feels like, dude.”
Before you answer, the knock on your front door takes you off guard. You sit up and throw the blanket off your body. Jisung mutters something in the background, but you can’t focus on what he’s saying. When you open the door, you almost stop breathing. You put the phone back up to your ear. “Jisung, let me call you back.”
He doesn’t even have time to respond before you hang up and toss it over to the side. Through the dark, Chenle stares back at you. His fists clench and unclench as he stands there in silence, clearly unsure what to say.
“What are you doing here?” you ask.
“I can’t fucking do this,” he replies. “I need you, okay? Don’t try and lie to me and say you have no feelings for me, because I saw you today. When I acted that way about you and Jeno, you asked me if I had feelings for you. Is that ‘cause you have them, too?”
“Yes.”
“Can you just be honest with—huh?” His brows furrow and his eyes narrow.
“You want the truth, Chenle? Yes. Yes, I like you, but I’m not letting you jeopardize your schooling for any of this. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
“I’ll be better,” he says. “I was just…distracted. It felt like every moment with you was fleeting, and I had to get every second I could before you disappeared.” He steps inside your apartment and closes the door.
“Lele, that’s such a big risk.” You feel like you’re shrinking in on yourself. How do you tell yourself it’s okay to be selfish this time if he doesn’t have to give anything up to be with you?
“And I get that. I do. But it’s worth it. You’re worth it. And I don’t want to let you go just because we’re still in school. We can have something real. Honestly, we’ve had that this whole time, and you trying to say we didn’t is doing us both a disservice.”
“What happened with that girl today?” you ask.
“You know what that was. A whole lot of fucking nothing.” He runs his fingers through his hair and wets his lips. “I didn’t even kiss her, by the way. I couldn’t. Seriously, I wanted to because I needed to know if these…feelings I have for you are real. Maybe that’s an awful way to do it, but I figured if I kissed someone else and it felt the same, then I’d be okay without you.”
You don’t say a word. His eyebrows furrow.
“I wanted to kiss her because I thought it’d give me the answer I desperately needed, not because I wanted her specifically. I want you. I’ve wanted you since the first fucking day I met you. And I couldn’t kiss her because she wasn’t you. Nobody will ever be you, and—”
“I love you.”
“—I wish there was a way I could—huh?”
You step closer to him. “You’re right. I love you. From the moment you had stars in your eyes just from talking about them.”
His jaw drops, and relief floods his features, but he flounders for words.
“If you don’t say it back, I might die of embarrassment.”
“God, of course, I fucking love you.” He scoffs, reaching forward to cup your cheeks and pull you to him.
Your lips meet so abruptly, you gasp. Without any hesitation, you wrap your arms around him and weave your fingers through his hair. His chest presses against yours, and whatever battle you’d been trying to fight until this point has been lost.
“You’re gonna be the death of me.” He punctuates each word with another kiss, and he begins to walk you backwards. You cling on to him but allow him to guide you.
“You have to promise you won’t let school fall behind,” you say breathlessly, placing your palms on his chest once you make it to your door frame. “That you won’t lose yourself because of me.”
“I hadn’t known myself until I met you, (Y/N). I’m only me if I’m with you.” Chenle gives you a soft smile. “If you’re mine, I won’t be worried about fleeting moments.”
You nod slowly, pulling him back to you. “I need you.”
He groans against your mouth, wrapping an arm firmly around your waist and walking you back until you’re by the edge of your bed. Without breaking the kiss, he follows you down to the mattress, his weight pressing you into it. You spread your legs to accommodate him, sliding your hands beneath the hem of his shirt to pull it off. He assists you, and as soon as it’s thrown across the room, you reach for him desperately to minimize the amount of time without the two of you connected.
“Say you love me again,” he mutters. “Please.”
“I love you,” you repeat easily, letting out a shaky breath as he reaches beneath your shirt to squeeze your breasts. His thumbs flick over your nipples, and you moan quietly.
“Me, too, baby.” He pulls your shirt off and interrupts the kiss to drag his lips down your neck. “There’s one thing you still haven’t taught me.”
“What’s that?”
“Show me how to make love to you.” He moves down further and takes your nipple in his mouth.
You tangle your fingers in his hair, gasping at the sensation. “Come here, Lele.”
When he’s face to face with you again, the darkness in his eyes has wetness spreading between your legs. He edges closer to you, unable to resist the urge of kissing you again. When he’s barely centimeters away, you lift your hand and trace his bottom lip, entranced by everything he is.
“Some things can’t be taught,” you whisper. “Sometimes, they just have to be felt.”
A ghost of a smile forms beneath your touch, and he nods. While his urgency is still there, he slows down, giving his hands freedom to explore you. Your back arches as his palm slides along your side. He grinds against you, shuddering breaths escaping. You lift up to match him, and you moan when you feel his hard length against your thinly covered core. The lust in his gaze has changed to adoration, a gentle gleam reflecting the moonlight outside as he removes your shorts and panties. His palm sends warmth through your abdomen, and he slowly moves lower.
“Can I?” he murmurs, kissing the corner of your mouth.
“Please.”
He kisses you as a distraction, and you whine when his fingertips press against your clit. Humming in his own form of pleasure, he rubs uniform circles.
“Relax,” he tells you. “You’re so tense, baby. Let me take care of you.”
You immediately melt. “More.”
He parts your lips with his tongue, and as soon as it enters your mouth, his fingers slip inside. You moan, eyes rolling back as you rock your hips. The noises pouring from you can’t be controlled. You break the kiss and gasp when he curls his fingers and hits your spot.
“Fuck, again.” You dig your nails into his shoulders.
He repeats the motion, the tip of his nose brushing along your cheek. In your ear, he says, “I love you. So fucking much.”
A shiver of pleasure runs down your spine. You tilt your head back. “I’m close, fuck.”
He takes your ear lobe between his teeth and tugs, eliciting a cry from the back of your throat. Your walls clamp down wildly on his fingers, but he knows you more than you’d care to admit at this point. Right before you crumble before his eyes, he removes his fingers from you. Before you can protest, he silences you with a kiss.
“Condom?” he asks.
“Up to you,” you reply.
He pushes his pants off and to the floor, and you have a brief moment to admire the bulge straining in his boxers before those are thrown, too. Wrapping his hand around his cock, he inhales sharply as he jerks himself off a couple times.
“Ready, baby?” He climbs over you again, nudging your sensitive clit with his tip.
You nod, tugging him closer. “Hurry up.”
Chenle trails down to line up with your entrance, and he groans when he coats himself in your arousal. “You’re so wet.”
You open your mouth to say something, but he pushes inside of you at the same time. A loud moan escapes instead, making you slap your own hand over your mouth as your walls stretch to accommodate Chenle.
“God, do you know what you fucking do to me?” He drops his head on your shoulder as he bottoms out deep inside you.
Both of you are impatient today, apparently, because he wastes no time in moving his hips. He only leaves the tip in, just to push his hips forward. His moans join yours, the sound enough to make your walls flutter around him.
“So good.” You match his movements, lifting up every time he thrusts.
He speeds up, making sure to press flush against you every time he bottoms out. The sight of him alone is enough to have you trembling, but seeing him entranced by where your bodies are connected has you clenching around him.
He lets out a long moan, and you join him in looking between the two of you. His skin slaps yours, and sounds of your arousal fill the room. His teeth sink into his bottom lip, and he reaches between the two of you to find your clit. The first contact makes you jolt and whine.
You wrap your legs around his waist, smashing your lips to his. He smirks against your mouth, the steady pace of his thumb on your sensitive bud sending spasms down your spine. Your stomach ties in knots, and you squirm beneath him.
“Lele, ‘m gonna cum.” You barely get the words out through your pleasured haze, and he nods, burying his head in your neck and thrusting into you harder. Your legs shake as you tighten them around him, and your entire being ascends as your orgasm slams into you. You moan so loudly, he kisses you to keep you quiet.
“Feels so good.” His voice cracks as he fucks you through your high.
You kiss him hard, and use your legs to flip the two of you over so you’re on top. His jaw drops at the sight of you, hands immediately trailing up your body to your breasts. You give him a second to admire before you start your steady pace. You lean back and brace your palms on his thighs, slowly rolling your hips as you sink down on his cock. He uses the position to put his thumb on your clit again. You jolt, cursing again as you speed up. The sensitivity has your eyes rolling to the back of your head, but the feeling of him snug inside you, rubbing against your walls, has you approaching a second orgasm.
You’re not expecting it, but you hope he lasts long enough to finish you off a second time. Your brain is clouded with pleasure, and one look at him tells you he’s teetering close to the edge. His jaw is clenched, face contorted in pleasure as he stares at you bouncing on top of him. You’re seconds away. Your orgasm builds deep inside you, and your hips falter. He thrusts up, moaning loudly. Legs quaking, your second orgasm hits you hard, back arching. Chenle sits up to catch you crumbling into his chest, rocking his hips. He wraps his arms around you and holds you to him tightly as one last thrust has him spilling deep inside you. Both of you are covered in sweat, panting in the aftermath of the pleasure.
“Fuck.” He pants, burying his head in your neck and kissing where it joins with your shoulder. “‘M never gonna get used to that.”
When you chuckle, he squirms and gasps.
“Did you know you like, clench when you laugh?” He squeezes your hips. “We’ve been doing this for months, and I’m still learning.”
“The human body is wonderful,” you tease him. “Maybe you’ll switch from physics to anatomy.”
“The only anatomy I’m curious about is yours.” He holds you close and turns you on your back. Placing one last kiss on your forehead, he pulls out of you slowly. A lazy smile graces his face as he sees the sticky mess between your legs.
“You weirdo.” You nudge him with your foot.
He grabs your ankle and yanks you down closer to him. Hovering over you, he narrows his eyes. “Me being a weirdo is solely your fault, you know.”
“I suppose you’ve earned it.” You pretend to think about it. “Kiss me.”
He doesn’t hesitate to lean down and press his lips to yours, the movement softer and slower than before. You don’t mean to let out a long sigh of pleasure, but his breath shudders against your mouth. “Don’t do that,” he whines. “I’ll get hard again.”
“Why don’t we go shower together?” You twirl his hair.
“Mm, you gonna let me wash your hair?” He presses soft kisses up your neck. “I’ll take any excuse to touch you, baby.”
“You’re getting good at this.” You laugh and rest your head back on the pillow. “You never would’ve talked like that before. It’s sexy.”
He hums and nips your skin. “That’s your magic.”
After a few more moments of him doting on you, the two of you get in the shower. The two of you stand under the water, relaxing in the hot steam and each other’s embrace. His hands trail over your body until he’s eventually cupping your breasts.
“Hear me out,” he mutters. “How about we both just drop out and stay exactly like this forever.”
“Sounds great in theory, Lele, but you made a promise.”
He groans. “I made a few promises tonight. Don’t worry, I meant all of them.”
His thumbs brush your nipples until they harden beneath his touch. He pins you to his chest with his arm, continuing his work on your breast as his other hand trails down your body. Apparently, you’ve turned him into something insatiable, but you definitely benefit from it. He stops with his hand on your hip.
“Need something, baby?”
The tone of his voice sends a chill down your spine, and mixed with hot water cascading over you, you moan. You clench your thighs together, desperate for friction.
He adjusts to pinch your nipple, rolling it between his fingers. “Feel good?”
“Touch me,” you whine, grabbing at his wrist to push him between your legs.
“If it were socially acceptable, I’d be touching you at all times.” His fingertips find your clit. “You’re so fucking warm, and those little sounds you make…”
“Faster,” you say as you arch your back.
“But you’re so sensitive,” he whispers. “I’m having fun like this.”
“Lele, please.” You drop your head back. “I need you.”
“Music to my fucking ears.” He sinks two fingers inside you, his palm smacking against your clit every time he thrusts them in.
Your arousal gushes over him, and he bites down on his bottom lip to keep any sounds at bay. He stops working your nipple, too focused on the way your walls clamp on his fingers. You whine at the loss, putting your hand over his to tell him to keep playing with you.
He pulls his fingers out, trailing the wetness along your thighs. Right when he pinches your nipple, he does the same to your clit. You jolt and cry out, rolling your hips to get more stimulation.
“I wanna fuck you so bad right now,” he groans. “You always look so fucking pretty when you want me like this.”
“I can take it,” you tell him as you squeeze your thighs together. “Anything you give me, I’ll take it.”
A deep moan escapes him, and the next thing you know, he’s pulling you back so he can bend you over.
“Hands on the wall,” he instructs.
Once you’re fully bent over, you push back against him, desperate for him to fill you. He strokes his cock, gaze stuck directly on your core. He reaches around your body, squeezing your breasts again.
He releases you and lines himself up with your entrance. Right when you think he’ll push inside, he rubs his tip on your clit. Without warning, he slides completely inside, his tip resting snug against your spot from this angle. You scream, already pushing your hips back.
Neither of you have time to breathe before he’s thrusting hard, nails digging into your skin as he pulls you back with every forward movement. Your hands slip down the wall, the squeak of the tile doing nothing but adding to the pleasure of him inside you. The water amplifies the clapping sounds of his body against yours, and your eyes roll back from all of the overwhelming feelings.
“Lele,” you whine. “S-spread my legs a little more.”
He does as you ask, still thrusting at a slower pace.
“Now keep going how you were.” You push back until he’s buried deep inside you.
He seems to understand your motive without you explaining it, and you thank everything you can think of that he’s so fucking smart. When he resumes his unrelenting pace, it’s joined with his balls smacking into your clit. Every thrust has your walls fluttering around him, and each hit on your sensitive bud brings you closer to your much needed orgasm.
“Just like that.” You can barely speak at this point, fucking yourself back on his cock to match his pace.
A knot ties in your stomach, and you’re left delirious as you chase the unraveling of it. You let out your loudest moan yet, letting all of the sensations around you drive you over the edge. Chenle curses behind you as your walls clamp down on him, but he keeps moving. It doesn’t take long for your pleasure to turn into overstimulation from him rubbing against your walls.
As soon as an unfamiliar cry leaves you, he stops immediately.
“Are you okay?” he asks, panting.
“I–I can’t keep—fuck, I’m sorry.” You clench your fists together.
“No, baby, it’s okay.” He carefully pulls out of you and guides you back to your feet. “Don’t be sorry. You’d never be mad at me for something like that.”
“But you—”
“The fact you even let me in at all still baffles me.” He chuckles, pulling you in for a short kiss. His cheeks are bright red, and while he’s brushing your hair out of your face, an idea comes to mind.
“Let me fix it.” You kiss his cheek.
Before he has the opportunity to ask what you’re talking about, you’re guiding him until his back is against the wall. The chill of the tile makes his cock twitch, and you wish you could take him again. Instead, you lower yourself down onto your knees.
“You’re—the tile’s gonna hurt your—”
“Do you want to cum in my mouth or on my face?”
He gulps. “You don’t have to—”
“Answer the question.” You glare up at him, and he curses.
“Your face. If that’s okay.”
You chuckle. “I wouldn’t have offered if it wasn’t.”
“It kinda—it sounds so hot but I don’t want you to think it’s demeaning or anyth—oh, fuck.” His head drops against the wall when you take him in your mouth. You sink further and further until he’s snug down your throat, your nose pressed to his pelvis.
You hollow your cheeks as you pull away from him. He slides out with a pop, and when you look up at him, his jaw is dropped.
“First of all, if I was worried about you looking down on me, we would not be having sex at all. Second, don’t be shy. Grab my hair. Fuck my throat, I don’t care.”
His eyes widen, and like you’ve awoken something inside him, he grabs the back of your head and pushes you forward. You grin smugly before wrapping your lips around his tip. Running your tongue along to gather his precum, you grab onto his thighs to keep you steady.
“C’mon, baby, take it.” He inhales sharply as he pushes his cock into your mouth. You let him take full control, humming around him.
The vibrations make his hips jerk, and his tip slams into the back of your throat. You whimper, tears welling in your eyes.
“‘M sorry,” he groans, thrusting at a steady pace. “Just feels so fucking good. Smack me if you need to stop.”
You give him the best nod you can and brace yourself against him. It doesn’t take long for his orgasm to approach after he has your confirmation. He holds your head firmly, letting out a high pitched moan as you gag and your throat constricts around him.
He mutters something incoherent, and you pull away from him and stroke him with your hand instead. As soon as his hips buck, you open your mouth. Strings of white shoot from his tip, and you close your eyes as it coats your face. You swallow what lands on your tongue, panting as you look up at him.
“Oh,” he murmurs, the tips of his fingers lifting your chin up. 
His thumb swipes over your bottom lip, and before he can rinse away his release, you lean forward and wrap your lips around him.
“My fucking God, you’re dangerous.” He kisses you, guiding you back beneath the water to rinse you off. You sigh into his kiss, finally letting the warmth relax you completely.
“We should get out soon,” you tell him.
“I don’t ever want to be away from you.” He shakes his head. “Let me at least wash your hair like I said I would.”
You laugh and roll your eyes. “You’re the one who got sidetracked, by the way.”
“And you love me for it. You said it yourself.” He beams at you, grabbing your shampoo from the shelf.
“That is the truth.” You wrap your arms around him and allow him to work his fingers through your hair.
After your hair is washed, the two of you get out of the shower. Both of you are beyond exhausted, so you end up right back in bed together, you curled into him like he’s a body pillow. He runs his fingers up and down your spine.
“Think Jisung’ll kill us?” he asks, sleep weighing down his voice.
“Who cares?” You listen to the steady sound of his heartbeat. “We’re happy.”
Chenle pulls you impossibly closer and presses his lips to the top of your head. If anyone told you when you first met him that this is how it was going to work out with Chenle, you would’ve laughed in their faces.
But life works in mysterious ways, and not only are you happier with Chenle in your life, but you’re a bit smarter, too.
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chrissdollie · 1 year ago
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can you imagine bakugou having a gf whos a teacher?? think of him having a girl who teaches kindergarten :( when he sees u teaching a student ab counting apples or something, his mind is going to be flooded with thoughts of having children with you. just watching you being so gentle nd sweet with the little brats munchkins turns his brain into mush.
one day, he pays a visit to your classroom wearing his hero costume for a requested q&a. everybody's in awe just looking at him, even if they don't know who he is. the students whisper to their friends at small desks as bakugou's large figure just struts in loll.
you give him a tiny little peck when he walks inside, to which some kids snicker and "ooohh". you clap your hands together to grab their attention. "okay boys and girls, let's walk over to the magic carpet for circle time!" you announce, leading your boyfriend to the large rug where two chairs were set.
the kids sit crisscrossed in a circle excitedly waiting to talk to the number two hero. bakugou grows shy as he sits down somewhat awkwardly. he feels silly, speaking to crowds ten times bigger than this on a daily basis was nothing, so what's the big deal? "today we have a special guest joining us for circle time! does anyone know who he is?" you grin toothily as many hands go up. "yes, ryu?" you pick on an adorable little boy in the center of the carpet. "that's mr. dynamite from the news!" he yelled.
"that's right, ryu! but let's use our inside voices, please." you smiled. "does anyone know what mr. dynamite does?" you questioned again. one little girl was squirming in her seat, hand held high. "go ahead, kanako." you nodded to the girl who sat up straighter upon being called on.
"he saves people, l/n-sensei!"
"damn right i do." bakugou smirked pridefully. you lightly nudged his shoulder. "no cursing." you whispered. he rolled his eyes but listened nonetheless. "okay, starting from this side of the rug," you pointed to the left. "you can ask anything you want to the hero, as long as you are kind. and if you don't have a question just say 'pass' and we'll go straight to the next person." you announced. all the children nodded in unison.
"start us off, please." you handed the 'talking mic' to the first kid. "mr. dynamite sir, where are your blasters?" he curiously turned his head to the side. "huh?-" bakugou looked down at his hands. "my gauntlets? left those guys at work. they're too powerful to be here." he answered.
the punks students continued to ask their questions and bakugou replied calmly like this was an everyday event. "you're big." a boy stated. bakugou quirked a brow. that's all this brat had to say? "i know." he replied nonchalantly. "why?" the kid blinked, keeping a straight face.
"uh, why?? i dunno, kid. jus' the way i am." he shrugged, not really knowing how to answer. the kid folded his arms and moved to sit on his knees. "it's my turn now.." a quiet girl next to him tapped on his shoulder, reaching out for the mic. the boy stuck out his tongue at her before turning away to look at bakugou again. "thas' not a real answer."
"kenji, that wasn't kind. you had your turn, now please give the mic to haru." you frowned. haru's eyes turned glossy and her lip began to quiver, but kenji still wasn't letting up. "thas' not fair, sensei!" kenji whined.
"hold it, kid." bakugou stepped in. kenji's attention turned to bakugou, an angry pout written all over his face. "ya ask me sum dumb question," he began. oh gosh, a dumb question? he's not wrong, but he can't say that to a 5 year old! "katsuki." you muttered, trying to get him to stop. but he kept going anyway.
"but i answered it, right? y'r not being a team player to y'r classmate, buddy." bakugou finished, waiting to see what would happen next. the room fell silent. kenji had listened, handed the microphone to haru. he was still upset though, everyone could see it.
"one minute, haru. kenji," you called out. the boy looked up with fat tears in his eyes. "is there something you want to say to your friend?" kenji wiped his eyes with the back of sleeve and mumbled "sorry." to haru. "is okay." haru accepted happily with a toothy grin.
bakugou leaned back in his chair, feeling satisfied with himself as the questions continued. huh, who knew right? you could get used to this.
when the period was over, bakugou waved goodbye to all the kids. however, he bent down in front of kenji and put his fist out. although the child was still somewhat annoyed, he couldn't hold in his grin as he fist bumped a pro hero. "let's all say 'thank you' to, mr. dynamite!" you stood up from your chair, folding your hands together.
"thank you, mr. dynamite!!"
bakugou kissed your cheek and walked to the door with you following behind. you opened the door and he adjusted his mask quickly. he ruffled your hair. "see ya at home, babe."
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revasserium · 2 months ago
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had me at hello
todoroki shouto; 4,082 words; fluff, tiny sprinkle of angst, no "y/n", summer camp, canon-divergent, domestic fluff, teeth-rotting fluff, summer-time romance, self-indulgent as all living fuck
summary: nothing lasts forever, not even goodbye. or, in which todoroki shouto discovers that summer flings really aren't his thing
a/n: chat we are SO back. back on this todoroki brain rot GRIND!!! and as opposed to posting at the last possible second for @pixelcafe-network's challenge friday like i did last time, i'm posting mine first this time to make up for it! the theme was "saying goodbye to a summer love" ♡⸜(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)⸝♡
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It was to be a whirlwind summer, one that’s different from every one that came before it. Todoroki had thought, naively, that summer training camp would end up being just that — just another summer thing.
And he’d never been fond of the heat.
But you — you’d swept in like the rain, all bluster and brilliant, summer-thunder laughter. You struck across his storm-ridden skies like a spark of lightning, setting all his forests ablaze.
At first, he didn’t think much of it. Didn’t think much of the volunteers that the Pussycats had brought along to help around camp. Groupies, he’d dismissed, and thought of it no more. But the first night everyone came back, exhausted and sore and sweating in places they’d never thought could produce sweat, you’d been there along with the others (he doesn’t remember their names now, but he remembers yours), passing around cold water and setting up the food for dinner.
“Here,” you hand him a water bottle; he dips his head, his chest still heaving from exertion. He twists off the cap and gulps down half the bottle, feeling a cool trickle escape the corner of his mouth to run down his chin. He wipes at it with the back of his hand just as you cast him a grin before turning around to hand another water bottle to Kirishima.
Todoroki swallows, his palms warm, watching as you laugh at something someone says. He lingers on the gloss in your hair and the ease of your smile. He wonders what kind of quirk you might have; he catches himself wondering, and then proceeds to wonder why he’s wondering at all.
He thinks it’s the heat — fanning himself, he looks away — glancing up at the smoldering sky before sighing and capping his water bottle.
“They must love you at school, huh?” you ask, your voice jolting him out of one reverie and into another. Dinner’s almost done, and he’d wandered toward the edge of the wood for a moment of quiet, of peace or sanctity. He hadn’t noticed you following him, and that in and of itself should have set his senses on high. But, the air is tepid and the humidity heavy, and Todoroki only has time to cock a single eyebrow before you smile and continue —
“Your quirk — keeps you cool in the summer, and warm in the winter. Useful, no?”
He watches you watching him, your eyes huge and full of the dancing flames. He looks back towards the rest of his classmates, all chatting and laughing, grouped loosely with one another, Ashido flitting from one group to the other like the social butterfly she is.
“It’s alright,” Todoroki answers, surprising even himself. He drops his eyes, fixing his gaze on a point just above his own feet before you laugh, the sound drawing his attention back towards you.
“You’re not a very good liar, but that’s okay. It’s not a bad thing.”
You shoot him another grin.
“Your quirk,” he says, clearing his throat slightly as he feels a distinct heat prickling up the sides of his neck, “can I ask what it is?”
You list your head to one side, your expression curiously blank. Before you shoot him a smile that can only be called devious.
You nudge him with an arm before dancing away, but that momentary contact is all you’d needed. Todoroki feels his whole body relax, feels some of the tension drop from his shoulders, the strange nervousness that had been coiling in his stomach unclench.
“Guess!”
Someone calls your name from over your shoulder.
“Coming!”
You give him one final wink before dashing off, leaving him dazed, head reverberating as if someone had rung him through like a bell on a Sunday morning.
The weeks had passed in a strange blur after that, as if some vengeful giant had gone stomping through his memories, dragging a large hand across the vivid scenes, smearing the colors and scrambling the timelines. He remembers the ever-present ache in his muscles, the eternal shortness of breath that had accompanied the first few weeks, but he also remembers your presence in the evenings — always in the evenings, the shadow of you flickering around each and every one of his classmates, mostly asking about their days, but sometimes placing a comforting hand here or there.
He remembers your touch well, the gentle anchor of it, the immediate relief.
“Your quirk… it has something to do with feelings, doesn’t it?” he asks one night, a towel draped around his shoulders from a recent shower, his hair still damp in the early evening dark.
You flash him an enigmatic smile, swinging your feet as you turn your head back towards the liquid moonlight casting pale shadows along the edges of the summer-still leaves.
“What makes you say that?”
“Just…” Todoroki joins you, letting his arm brush along yours, his eyes following your gaze as he too sweeps the now empty campgrounds, the remnants of the barbeque fires still smoldering in their pits, the smoke twisting towards the cloudless sky like so many misty-tendrilled streams.
“Had a feeling.”
“A feeling, huh?” you echo, laughing softly, looking back down.
Todoroki doesn’t push you, but you don’t deny it either.
“You’re not wrong,” you say, after a brief moment of silence, “my quirk — it’s not offensive, or even defensive but… if I’m touching someone, I can… siphon their feelings into me,” and as if to demonstrate, you gently press your leg to his, and Todoroki feels the tired wariness drain from him, the feeling of ease trickling through him like hot water cascading down his skin.
He stifles a soft groan, feeling a blush press up against his cheeks.
You move your leg away, leaning back till your head is resting against the back of the park bench, poised at the edge of the large encampment.
“But that’s…” Todoroki searches for the right word — somehow ‘useful’ doesn’t seem quite right.
“No, you’re right,” you say, giggling even as you save him the necessity of finishing his sentence, “it’s a good quirk to have. It’s… necessary.”
But the way you say that word sounds a little too much like heartbreak for Todoroki to ignore.
“You said siphon…” he says, after a brief stretch of quiet, and he tastes the word on his tongue as if saying it for the first time.
“Yeah, that’s right,” you say, and longing is too close a friend of his for him not to notice it threaded through your voice like a secret.
“Which means… whatever you take from the person you’re touching… you have to feel it too, right?”
You lick your lips, your eyes flickering down to your hands, palms open.
“Yes.”
It’s a simple answer, but one that lands with a gut-punch of implication. Todoroki swallows, shifting ever so slightly to let his knee rest against yours. He tries his hardest to focus on calmness, to project relief. You turn to flash him a smile.
“You’re sweet,” and he hadn’t meant to blush, hadn’t meant for his heart to kick up like a drumbeat, but does. And he knows, instinctively, that you’d felt it too — passing through from his skin to yours by some strange glitch of nature.
He makes to pull away, but you reach out to rest a hand on his arm.
And almost instantly, he feels his heartbeat calm, feels the heat receding. But it isn’t like before — it isn’t the feeling of having something leave his body, but rather having something pressed in. Like a warm blanket settling over his shoulders, or a cold hand to ward off unwanted heat. Your calm seeps into him like summer rain, cooling his mind until he’s breathing steady.
He blinks down at you, startled.
“It goes both ways,” you say, and he can see the twin glow of warmth high in your cheeks. He spares a moment wondering if that blush had once belonged to him, if you were just holding onto it for a bit longer before letting it go. You move your hand away and he has to fight down the urge to pull it back.
“Oh,” is the only thing he can think of to say.
You are everywhere after that — perhaps not in the physical sense, but Todoroki seems to have lost the ability to not notice you. Or maybe he’s just gained the ability to — to what? Develop a crush? Is that even what this is? He doesn’t know — he’s never had one before to compare it to.
But he can’t help now how instantly his attention snags on the sound of your voice, like a stray thread on a mesh-wire fence, or how an unshakable shiver traces down his spine whenever you’re near. He feels childish, like he did when he was too little to control his quirk. But he’d learned since then, hadn’t he?
Hadn’t he?
“It’s all just hormones!” he overhears Ashido say to Uraraka one night, the girls all clustered together on a single long sofa, limbs against limbs, cheeks pillowed on shoulders, a careless sort of closeness threading them all together. Todoroki’s never thought himself a jealous person, but watching them now, he wonders what it might be like to be able to touch a person with little to no thought at all, for it all to be second nature.
Uraraka blushes something furious, crinkling her nose.
“I — I don’t know…”
“I’m pretty sure whatever Mineta-chan is feeling can’t just be explained by hormones,” Asui says, her eyes huge and dark even as Ashido rolls her eyes.
“Maybe not just hormones, but that’s a large part of it!” Ashido insists.
Dangling on the side of the sofa, one foot tapping to music only she can hear, Jiro glances over and shrugs.
“Boys are weird.”
The girls all make varying sounds of agreement, and Todoroki forces his feet to move, thankful for the thick slab of shadow that had kept him from view of the general common area. He stares ahead as he walks down the long length of hallway, wondering if hormones really are the culprit behind whatever the hell this is.
The grueling days bleed into sweat-slick weeks, and somehow, he finds himself seeking you out more and more often. Sometimes after a particularly hard training session, under the guise of needing some “help” recovering (it had come out that Recovery Girl couldn’t make it so the Pussycats had volunteered you as the next best thing), sometimes without any reason at all, other than the simple want of your company.
He finds himself laughing, finds himself reaching for you — and he blames it on the weather, blames it on the tiredness now eternally sunk into his muscles, the soreness that won’t ever quite go away. He tells himself that it’s just a summer thing, to feel so hot that he gets lightheaded, to laugh until his stomach hurts, to feel the inexplicable itch to graze your hand with his when you’re sitting too close and not nearly close enough.
Thinking back, he’d known it would never last. You’d told him early on that you don’t live in the city. But that it’s not too far, if ever he wanted to visit.
“Camp’ll be over in a few weeks,” you say, lying back on a patch of sun-dried grass, beneath a swirling canopy of stars, Todoroki sitting beside you, his arms propping up his torso as he stares up at the sky alongside you.
“Yeah. I’m surprised it’s been so peaceful,” he says.
You laugh, shooting him a curious look.
“Used to getting in trouble?”
“There… seem to be a few of my classmates that attract trouble. Of all kinds.”
“I don’t mind a bit of trouble.”
“Don’t you?”
You grin up at him as he glances down at you.
“Not one bit.”
You feel him shifting as he lies down next to you, your elbows brushing in the grass. He feels a jolt of electricity snake up his arm, coiling in the base of his belly. For a second, he wonders if its a him-feeling, or a you-feeling. And then, he realizes that it doesn’t really matter — and before he knows it, he’s twisting to his side, leaning over just far enough to press his lips to yours.
In the grand scheme of kisses, Todoroki thinks that it might not have been the most well-positioned kiss, or the most well thought-out. And for all everyone calls him genius, this is one thing he’s never really had the chance to practice. Still, by the time he realizes that he’s kissing you, he barely has the chance to reconcile with the fact that you’re kissing him too. You, pressing up against him and pulling him down all at once.
His lips on yours, and yours on his — an endless echo of this kiss, and this kiss, and just this kiss. He feels his heartbeat like a reverberation, because he thinks he can feel yours too. He loses feeling in all his limbs, and wonders briefly if this is what free-falling might be like — to feel weightless, to be lifted outside of yourself.
You reach up to press a hand to his cheek, and he feels himself being shunted back into his body. He feels each of his limbs like discovering them for the very first time — his fingers tangled in your hair, his other arm wrapped tightly around your waist, pulling you in, holding you close. He does not remember pulling away. But he must have, because he remembers gasping for a breath he’s long since lost to the heave of your lungs.
He feels fire, and ice, and the spinning song of a million overhead stars.
“Is this — are you —” he struggles for words but you just smile.
“I don’t know — sometimes when I’m too —” you swallow, a bit breathless yourself, the head-thrumming heat of it all passing between the pair of you like a whisper, or a secret, “when I’m too excited I — I’ll accidentally make someone else feel it too but —”
You look back up to catch his eyes, and he finds himself smiling.
“It’s not just you,” he says, quiet and sure. Because this, whatever this is, is more than just a quirk — more than just the accidental bleeding of feelings from one body to another. More than simple empathy — it’s entropy.
A chaos of feelings.
Because he’d felt it bubbling inside him, alone at night, staring up at the moon-slatted ceiling. Wondering what it might be like to hold your hand.
And maybe this is what Ashido had been talking about — with hormones and urges and all the woes that come with being a teenage boy. But he doesn’t care; there’s time to worry about that later. For now, he thinks he’d just like to kiss you again.
And so, he does.
Time passes by strangely after that — and though neither of you had intended on it, the budding relationship between the pair of you had become a known secret. No one had ever called it out by name, but no one questions Todoroki either when he wanders off after dinner. No one blinks twice when you press a hand to the back of his neck after morning drills, smiling when he lets out a soft, pleased sigh.
Even years later, Todoroki can’t quite piece together the exact timeline of things. He remembers the late nights, staying up just to talk to you, wandering through the woods, you jumping at a rabbit or a squirrel, and him slipping his hand through yours with a silent reassurance. He remembers telling you about himself — even though he doesn’t remember you asking. About his father, his mother, his siblings, his scar.
He remembers how you’d reached out and held his anger and sorrow and resentment in your upturned palms, how you cradled them like bruised fruit, with delicate fingers and a smile that looked not one bit like pity. How you did not run.
He remembers you telling him about your childhood too, of your quirk being used and abused by careless adults and ruthless children alike. Of how your parents had used you as one might use a bad therapist, like a dumping ground for unwanted emotions. Of how you learnt to deal with the unbearable weight of all those feelings — things that a little girl should never have to learn how to deal with on her own.
He remembers how you held him and he held you, and how you both had allowed yourselves to hold and be held by each other.
But what he remembers most is the ending — the last night of camp, when he knew he’d be leaving the next morning. All the bags are packed, and they’d all come out stronger. It had been an uneventful, tiring sort of camp, where nothing happened except daily training, but for a class full of teens with super-human powers and the uncanny ability to attract life-threatening situations, it could be called a resounding success.
“Excited to be going back to school?” you ask.
He watches you drag a pale pink nail polish over your fingers, one by one, blowing on each finger as you smooth out the color with steady swipes.
“I guess so. We have provisional license exams coming up, so I doubt we’ll get much rest after this.”
“Aww… but I guess no one ever said becoming a hero was an easy thing, right?” you laugh, tossing him a good-natured wink.
He sighs, leaning back against the wall of your camp room.
“Nothing worth having is ever easy.”
“Hm…” you hum, finishing off your manicure and carefully screwing the brush back into the nail polish bottle.
Todoroki turns to find you frowning slightly at your nails.
“What’s wrong?”
“Just…” you press your hands carefully into your lap, “it got me thinking — this was… easy, wasn’t it?”
And he doesn’t have to ask what you’d meant by this. Because he knows. And with a jolt, he realizes that yes. This was easy. It was so easy, being with you, in this secluded place. So easy to laugh without worrying about the outside world, to forget, if only for a while.
Easy to kiss you, to hold you, to push away the thoughts of tomorrows and endings until — well.
“Yeah…” Todoroki breathes, “I guess… I guess it was.”
Silence blooms between you like a plume of smoke.
“But… I mean,” you say, waving your hands through the air to help your nails along, before slumping back into your pillows, “it was never going to be forever, right?”
And this time, Todoroki can’t quite tell if you’re talking about this or perhaps — he can’t help the tiny bead of hope coalescing in his chest — a future where your goodbye is the thing that doesn’t last forever.
“No,” he answers, allowing himself a small smile as he looks down at his own hands, “nothing really ever is.”
You giggle, rolling over to peer at him from your stomach, “You’re so serious.”
But by the time he lifts his head, you’d already crawled over to press your lips to his. It’s a sweet kiss, a simple kiss, and Todoroki feels his chest seize inside him, his arms going heavy with a liquid weight. When you pull away, he notices your eyes are fractured with tears. You wipe them away with a laugh.
“Look at me — I’m so silly.”
Todoroki shakes his head, reaching out to cup your cheeks gently between his hands, the way you’d taught him to with his own jagged emotions. And he feels it then, your sadness, your uncertainty, the stomach-twisting knowledge of endings.
“The beginning might’ve been easy but… this isn’t.”
You hiccup, going still as he holds you.
“So… I guess we were worth it after all, huh,” you say, looking down at the space between you.
Todoroki nods, leaning forward just enough to press his forehead to yours, nudging your nose with his for a second before bringing you in for yet another kiss. He pulls away and tastes salt on his lips.
“That’s how we know — because the ending is hard. That’s how we know it was worth it.”
When the next morning comes, you don’t cry when you wave them all off, though many of the girls are. You catch his gaze and hold it for just a second longer than you’d done with anyone else. Beside him on the bus, Aoyama makes a soft, knowing kind of noise.
“Ah… first love is always such sweet despair,” he says, twinkling in his usual way.
Todoroki clears his throat, leaning back in his seat, a strange stillness settling over him as he thinks about the days ahead.
“Yeah, I suppose it is,” Todoroki says, to Aoyama’s dramatic surprise. But he recovers quickly and begins a soliloquy about something or other that carries them all the way back into the city, and to their assigned dorms.
He never forgets you, though there are moments when he’d wonder if that summer had really happened. Years later, when the memories have all gone watercolor-pale, and the edges blurred with time, he’ll still find himself reaching into the part of his mind that feels like the soft, steady weight of your hand on the back of his neck to calm him down, the smooth of your skin as you’d pressed against him and held him close.
And then, the year that he turns 24, it happens — he’d been called out into a small town just outside Shizuoka, for some kind of event that Fuyumi swears would be good for his publicity (as if he needed any more). Even after all these years, it still unsettles him to travel alone to these places, and he subconsciously reaches for the feeling of your palm pressing to his skin.
“Shouto?”
He turns at the sound of his name, and though a part of him assumes it’s yet another adoring fan, the deepest, most honest part of him whispers that it isn’t — that he knows this voice.
“Oh… its you,” the words slip from him like pebbles into a thawing stream.
And there you are, standing feet from him, your arms full of groceries, a red and white muffler strung around your shoulders, looking every bit as brilliant as the you from his memories.
The smile that splits your face is beautiful as heartbreak.
“Well, someone very wise once did tell me that nothing lasts forever… not even goodbyes.”
Todoroki takes half a step closer to you, a smile spreading across his own lips as he reaches out to help you with your groceries, taking the bags into his arms. The movement as natural as coming home.
“Yes but… I was thinking about it the other day and —”
“Oh? Just the other day?” you tease, bumping him slightly with your elbow was you set off down the half-empty street. It’s almost sundown, and the days are getting shorter again. Your breath fogs up the air before you and Todoroki suddenly thinks that winter looks good on you.
Even better than summer had.
“Yeah, but I realized…” he says, casting his eyes up at the cloud-strewn sky, the colors fading fast, the thick velvet of night inching up across the world like a curtain being drawn.
He turns his eyes back towards you, only to find you watching him with an indulgent smile on your face.
Todoroki blushes, feeling suddenly bashful, like the teenage boy he was when you two first met.
“I realized,” he says again, determined to finish his thought this time, “that when we first met… we never really said hello.”
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sophsicle · 3 months ago
Text
I'm Sorry I'm the One You Love
Part I (Part II)
Sirius Black isn't in love with James Potter. Though sometimes Remus looks at him like he is. Like Sirius is sad and pathetic and...he doesn't even know, pining?
But he isn't.
Well.
Alright.
Sad and pathetic, perhaps. Depending on who you ask. On when you're looking. But he isn't pining. And he isn't in love with James.
That would be too easy.
Sirius thinks he could bear just being in love with him. Thinks that's a pill he could swallow. Unrequited feelings and all that. He'd mope around and write sad songs and drink too much. But eventually he'd get past it the way people seem to do with those kinds of feelings. But he isn't in love with James, is the problem.
He's fucking consumed by him.
"Sirius."
"Don't start."
Remus huffs, but, mercifully, goes back to his coursework, shaking his head while he does. Sirius, on the other hand, keeps staring at James and Lily. They aren't doing anything really, Sirius doesn't reckon Evans is one for big, public displays of affection. But then, maybe that'd be better. James and him don't - they've never - done that. Kiss or anything. So. It probably wouldn't feel so much like a kick in the fucking teeth the way watching them now does. Leaning into one another, heads nearly pressed together, whispers traded back and forth, secret smiles, nudging feet. James and Sirius have done that plenty.
Remus sighs again. "Why don't you talk to him?"
After a few seconds Sirius manages to pull his eyes away from the grotesque spectacle on the other side of the library. Why the hell are they sitting there anyway? Surely they could have sat at the same bloody table?
"I talk to him every day," Sirius says blankly. Which earns him a deeply unimpressed look.
"You know what I mean."
"I don't."
"You do."
"Don't."
He gets an eye roll this time. "Fine," muttering as he picks up his quill. "Have it your way then."
Remus has freckles splashed across his nose and cheeks, and just about the longest eyelashes Sirius has ever seen. He's obsessed with them, to tell you the truth. He's asked Remus if he uses some kind of potion for them but the other boy only scrunched his nose up, giving Sirius a look he didn't understand.
Remus's eyes flick up again now, meeting Sirius's, finding him staring. Sirius doesn't look away. He isn't embarrassed. Not about this. Not about most things, honestly.
"What?" Remus ask warily.
Sirius only shrugs. "Astronomy Tower? Tonight?"
Remus holds his gaze for a long moment before dropping his head again. "Fine." He doesn't sound overly enthusiastic but then, he never does with Sirius.
Sirius has never kissed James. Not even once. Though he's thought about it a few times. Sometimes he wants to ask James if he's thought about it too. Just so he knows. He's never kissed James.
But he has kissed Remus.
Loads.
He thinks he might be an expert at this point.
It takes the edge off. Makes him feel less like he's going insane every time he sees James. Like he wants to eat him and not in a sexual way, not really, more like in the way wolves want to sink their teeth into the necks of rabbits. Want to snap their spines. Want to feel them go limp. Want to swallow them whole so that there's no difference anymore. Between them. Between us. I've made you part of me. Bone of my bones. Blood of my blood. Skin of my skin.
See. It's not love. Sirius doesn't know what it is but it's not that.
After a few more seconds he kicks Remus under the table, causing the other boy to look up in exasperation. But this time when their eyes meet Sirius smiles the way he knows Remus likes. Feeling his insides grow warm when Remus smiles back - even if he's a little delicate about it.
Sirius isn't in love with James Potter.
But he might be in love with Remus.
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lipglossanon · 1 year ago
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Stay Right Through
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☆───── ⋆⋅🐾⋅⋆ ─────☆
Dogman!Leon S. Kennedy x fem!reader (one shot)
Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, hybrid au, dogman Leon, master/pet dynamics, dirty talk, oral (f receiving), mounting, breeding, knotting, unprotected sex, creampie
not proofread 👌
Title from Wandering by Good Charlotte 💜
Part 2: I Only Touched Her Hips But She Saw It
☆───── ⋆⋅🐾⋅⋆ ─────☆
Excitement makes your leg bounce as you wait for the lady to come back from setting up. 
You did get to the hybrid adoption center a little early, but you’re just really happy to be here! 
Hybrids were all the craze ages ago, but since the newness has died off (aka puppy syndrome has waned) there were more and more of these places opening up. Your parents never saw the point in getting a hybrid for the family, very old fashioned not to mention pretty anti pet in general. 
So now, you have your own place and a steady job that isn’t eating up all your time anymore making it the perfect time to get a feel for what kind of hybrid you want. You’re definitely open to any of them, but it seems like the dog hybrids have a higher turnover rate which is why you’re at this specific adoption center. 
The lady finally comes around to the front desk and smiles at you. 
“Sorry for the wait, now how may I help you?”
You glance at her name tag, “Hi Patricia, and I’m looking into adopting. I was hoping to kinda get the ball rolling today.”
She laughs, “Not a problem. If you could fill out this form, I can put this in the system while you take a look around and see if there’s anyone you like.”
“Thank you,” you smile, taking the forms and returning to your seat. 
It takes a lot longer than anticipated, but soon enough you have all your i’s dotted and t’s crossed. Turning in the clipboard, Patricia stands up and leads you over to a locked door. She runs her card across the electronic sensor and opens it for you. 
She gives you a little nudge inside, “There are caretakers throughout if you have questions or concerns. Cameras are all over the facility but you look like a nice enough person so I’m sure we won’t have any issues.”
She laughs a little and waves as she closes the door behind her, leaving you to sort of walk around and look. 
The place is a lot different than the mental picture you had; it’s set up like an open floor plan, but with individual mini rooms separated by cubicle partitions. It seems like in the center is just a large lounge type area with couches and an entertainment center. Past all of that you can make out granite counters suggesting a kitchen. 
With that, you can see all kinds of hybrids hanging around in the living area or just milling about talking with one another. 
“Hi! Need help?”
You look over at the perky blonde woman with the name tag Sherry.
“Uh kinda, I just don’t want to step on any toes, y’know?” you smile feeling a little shy. 
“Not a problem,” she laughs, gesturing for you to walk with her, “I’ll just give you a quick tour and let you meet some of the pups.”
“Not that I don’t appreciate it, but I was really hoping to look at older—“
“Oh gosh, that’s great,” she gushes, “sorry to cut you off, but we have more than we like to see with older dog men.”
“Oh,” you laugh at her bubbly attitude, “well that’s great,” you wince, “not that it’s great.”
She pats your arm in solidarity, “I totally understand. But I’ll take you right over to where they like to hangout. They tend to stay away from the center of the lounge, too many yapping pups.”
Her voice must mimic one of the older hybrids with that last comment and you laugh along with her. 
She guides you closer to the kitchen area but off to the side that sort of resembles a ‘man cave’ for lack of a better term. It’s more dimly lit with similar lounge furnishings. 
“Hi everyone!” Sherry lights up the space with her presence, some of the hybrids calling back to her as you two walk closer. 
“We have a new prospective friend here,” she introduces you to a trio of dog men standing up from the couch. 
“Nice to meet you all!” you wave, excitement probably making you smile like a maniac but you’re just so happy to finally have this chance. 
“Nice to meet you, I’m Chris,” a tall, dark haired dogman nods, his Rottweiler ears flopping a little as he tilts his head to look over at the other two. 
“H-hi, I’m Ethan,” the mild mannered blonde rubs the back of his neck nervously, his twitching ears reminding you of a Chow Chow making you smile wider. 
“Leon,” the last dogman gives you a lazy two finger salute, sandy blonde hair nearly hiding his soft Labrador ears.  
“Would you like to hang out here while I run off to grab some pamphlets?” Sherry asks you with a twinkle in her eye, giving you an option to hang out with these three alone.
“Sure,” you nod, watching as she spins on her heel and walks in the direction of the office. 
You turn back to the three dog men who quickly invite you to sit and hang out. Chris is quick to talk, adept at conversation making you laugh at some anecdote or other. Ethan’s a little more subdued, reminding you of yourself, chiming in every now and then. He seems to help reign Chris in when he gets a little too enthusiastic. 
Leon, although he talks less than Chris, constantly draws your attention. You don’t know if it’s cheesy puns or his overly cynical jabs (which Chris takes offense to and then Ethan’s breaking up their growling and snapping), but you have a good feeling about him. So by the time Sherry makes her way back with some actually helpful pamphlets, your mind is all made up. 
“It was so nice meeting you all,” you wave cheerfully, following Sherry back to the front.
“Well, any lucky candidates?” Sherry asks with poorly hidden enthusiasm. 
“Yep,” you smile at her, happy with your choice, “I’d love to take in Leon, if he’s fine with it of course.”
“I’m sure he will be!” she enthuses, clapping her hands, “he’s been here the longest so I’m so happy to see someone finally pick him!”
“Really?” you look back through the door right before it shuts, “I’m surprised.”
“Eh,” she waves you off, leading you over to a different section, “he’s just grumpy,” she pauses and looks around before whispering, “people come in, pick him out, then being him back after the trial week. Always the same, he’s too sarcastic, too grumpy, they just want a younger dog.” 
Your heart cracks after hearing that, determination blazing through the sadness, “Well that’s not happening this time.”
Sherry looks at you, eyes contemplative before grinning, “I think you two will be a good fit!”
She has you hang out in her office as she prints some documents to put in a Manila folder for you to take home. 
“You’re all set,” she leads you out the back to the parking lot, “your background check should clear in about three days and we’ll call to set up a time to have Leon do a trial stay at your place.” 
You hesitate but push through to ask, “Is it okay if I come by tomorrow? I’d like to make sure Leon is fine with it, too.”
Sherry looks a little teary eyed as she quickly nods, “Of course, please do. I think he’s gonna be perfectly happy with ya though.”
You bid your goodbyes and you get in your car to head home. It’s not that far of a drive, luckily, and since it’s on the other part of town there’s no crazy traffic. You’re home lounging on the couch in no time, texting your friend Heather all the details. Once you send her the link to Leon’s profile, she does not shut up about him.  
Rolling your eyes, you close your phone and start reading through the folder. It’s all pretty basic info on how to care for a hybrid; they’re pretty much like a person, just a little less adept at some things. They can hold a job if they wish but more seem to choose the pet lifestyle. 
Gazing down at Leon’s profile photo, you  just really wanna take care of him. Show him that not all owners are complete douchebags. 
The next day passes quickly and by the time works over, you’re tired but buzzing—excited to get to the adoption place and meet up with Leon again. 
Sherry greets you again, just as enthusiastic as before. She leads you over to one of the cubicle partitioned rooms and raps her knuckles on the side. 
“Leon, she’s here,” her voice sing songs. 
“Have fun,” she pats your arm and turns back the way you both came. 
Leon’s nice enough to you, but you can tell he’s acting very closed off—keeping all of the conversation pretty baseline and shallow. No matter how grumpy and gruff he’s acting, you’re literally showering him with enthusiasm. You show him pictures of your house (including the room that’s all his, if he wants it or you can work something else out). 
You ask him tons of questions, but he only answers a few. A few times you say something that makes him smother a smile or a laugh making your heart flutter in your chest. Right before it’s time to go, you’re shifting on your feet at the opening of his room. 
“I know I’ve asked a million times, but are you good with living with me? I promise I really won’t push it if not,” you smile shyly, “I’d be super bummed though.”
His blue eyes watch you, unreadable for a moment before he smirks, “Hey beats being here,” he raises his voice a little, “plus I won’t have to deal with deadbeat rotties.”
The partition wall next to you rattles and you see Chris looming over it to glare at Leon. 
“I’ll be glad to see you go, tomorrow can’t get here soon enough.”
“Tomorrow?” you ask quizzically. 
Leon looks a little sheepish but shrugs easily, “Pretty sure they pushed it through this afternoon.”
“Oh,” you beam, feeling giddy all over, “that’s great! I’ll be here as soon as works over! Oh! And then we have the whole weekend to get you settled in, this is going to be so much fun!”
Chris and Leon both look amused as you finish rambling, now feeling bashful for coming on too strong.  
You fidget before clearing your throat, “C-can I pet your ears?”
Chris’ eyebrows raise and he grins at Leon, “Can’t believe you, Kennedy; she hasn’t got to pet you yet?” he tilts his head toward you, while looking at Leon, “you can pet me, ma’am.”
Leon steps between you two and snarls at him making Chris laugh and drop back down behind his wall. He walks closer to you, lowering his head due to his height. 
You smile sweetly making him blush as you softly run your hands through his hair before coming up to rub his soft sandy colored ears. He shivers and headbuts your shoulder, silently asking for more. Stifling the giggle that wants to escape, you use both hands to pet and rub his soft ears. 
“You’re such a good boy,” you murmur not really thinking. 
He whines a little and nuzzles into your neck making the giggle you were suppressing come bubbling out. He noses against your skin, huffing warm breaths as you continue to pet him. 
“You’re so sweet, Leon, I’m happy you’re coming home with me,” you keep your voice low and soothing.
He only chuffs against your neck, rough tongue coming out to lap at your skin before he’s pulling away. You smile at him as Sherry turns the corner. 
“Sorry to cut this short, but we’re closing soon. Good news is you and Leon leave out from here together tomorrow,” she hands you yet another folder filled with information. 
You take the folder and wave to Leon who moved back over to his bed, “See you tomorrow, Leon.”
He just gives you a little wave as Sherry leads you back to the front. She sees you out the door with a smile and a promise to be the one to help you out. 
Once you get home, you pace your living room. You feel like you have so much to do but don’t know where to start. Texting Heather, she tells you to chill out and actually sit down. Laughing to yourself about how well she knows you, you collapse onto your couch just realizing how tired you actually feel.  
Your phone dings with a new text from Heather. Honestly, ever since you told her your idea, she’s been sending you cute puppy videos. They’ve been full of all types of pets getting along with their owners doing silly things together.  It honestly helped you cement your plan on picking an older dogman since you rarely saw any in those videos. 
This text, however, was sent with the cryptic ‘to fill in those lonely hours 😜’ and knowing her sense of humor you’re kinda worried about the link. 
Knick Knack Paddywhack sounds kinda cheesy but you definitely didn’t expect porn to be on the other side of that link. 
At first you don’t even realize that’s what it is; it starts off pretty tame in general and before you know it this female owner is being mandhandled face down onto the couch as this huge, buff mandog is mounting her from behind. 
“Yeah you’ve been fucking gagging for this doggy’s dick huh?” 
You really should exit from the video but some dark horny part of your brain is too entranced by what’s happening to even move. Distantly, you notice that his dick looks exactly like a human male’s just with the addition of a knot at the base. He fucks her roughly, stretching her out and forcing his cock deep in her wet pussy. 
The dirty talk is really what’s making you go a little cross eyed with arousal. 
“Oh fuck yeah, knot me, breed my little pussy.”
“You want that? Wanna be my pretty bitch always on her hands and knees?”
“Unh unh yeah, make me your bitch. Wanna have your pups.”
You watch in mounting curiosity and arousal and shame as the camera shows her cunt take his entire knot, sealing them together as he ruts through her climax. 
Quickly exiting before the video can go further, you drop your head in your hands. Your panties are soaked, making your thighs feel tacky. In a daze, you move off the couch and head into the bathroom to take a shower. Your thoughts are a whirlwind. 
You’ve honestly never given it any thought about inter species relationships; you’ve heard about them sure, but only in passing and never any details. Now, you literally can’t stop thinking about that mandog dominating his ‘owner’ and knotting her. Shivering, your nipples pebble under the warm water. 
Leon’s gruff voice and handsome face swim into your thoughts making your clit pulse with your heartbeat. Would he—
You shake your head vigorously. Nope, not going there. You’re gonna shower and then go to bed, maybe watch a cartoon or something to keep your thoughts G rated. 
All of that’s easier said than done, but you somehow manage and before you know it you’re waking up the next morning, excited to go pick up Leon and bring him home. 
It’s pretty anticlimactic once you leave work and pick Leon up; Sherry had everything at the front ready to go with Leon just standing next to her. She leads him out to the car with you carrying the essentials, stowing them in the trunk while she unclips his collar and leash. 
“Please keep us updated,” she ruffles Leon’s hair making him bat her hands away with an eye roll, “we love seeing our pups flourish.”
“Not a pup,” he grouses, climbing into the backseat and shutting the door. 
Sherry laughs, “I’ll miss him but I’m more happy he’s leaving.”
“Thank you so much for everything,” you shake her hand, “and I promise to stop by every now and again with updates.”
She walks back inside as you climb into your car. Looking at Leon in the rear view mirror as he stares out the window moodily, you crank the car and slowly leave the lot. 
“Do you need anything before we get home?” you ask, breaking the quiet. 
He shakes his head no making his ears flop. You hide your smile and turn your attention back to the road. Once home, Leon settles in seamlessly; he takes the bedroom you offer but after the second night has made a little bed for himself in your room, tucked into the corner. When you asked, concerned he wasn’t happy with his room, he just gave you the short reply of needing to make sure you’re safe. 
You didn’t push it but let him know he’s more than welcome to tell you if he’s unhappy with anything. 
Days passed into weeks which quickly became months. Leon made himself right at home and now you really couldn’t picture your life without the dogman. It was nice coming home after a long day and be greeted with someone so happy to see you. Although Leon is still pretty stunted with showing affection, you usually can convince him to snuggle you on the couch and let you pet him til his tail wags. 
He’s really particular about having his tail touched so you don’t pry or push, more than happy to just pet his head and ears. 
Today when you get home for work and enter the house, Leon’s beelining straight for you, burying his face in your neck. 
“TGIF huh,” you laugh, petting his ears making him whine. 
“Missed you so much,” he breaths in your smell, tongue lapping up your neck to your jaw, stubble tickling your skin. 
He licks across your mouth once making you jerk back but he quickly follows, raspy tongue licking over your lips and chin. 
“Leon—“
You try to tell him to stop as you push at his shoulders but that just gives him the leverage to lick into your mouth. You keep pushing at him while you take a step back to make him stop, but your legs get tangled and you both fall back on the entryway carpet. 
Leon still hasn’t let up, and since you were more worried about making sure neither of you hurt yourselves when tripping, he’s drooling and licking into your mouth making you whine and push harder at his shoulders. 
He shifts until he’s between your legs and rocks down against the apex of your thighs. Grunting, he shoves your skirt up and tears your panties in half. One of his broad hands, grabs your flailing arms by the wrists and pins them to your chest. 
Finally he pulls away from your swollen mouth, licking his way down to your neck again. 
“Leon, stop being such a bad boy,” you gasp out, “what’s gotten into you?”
“Heat,” he sniffs against your neck before lightly licking the skin again, “need you so bad.”
You’re in a daze as you feel his bulge grinding against your bare pussy, slick starting to slowly drip out of your hole. As much as you protest, you’re really getting off on this, on Leon losing control and wanting to fuck you. 
“T-there are heat toys the center gave me,” you try to cut this off before you both go too far, “you can use those.”
He growls and nips your neck making you whimper. 
“Don’t wanna knotting toy,” his growling is getting deeper as he grinds against you harder, “only wanna knot my pretty owner.”
“Oh fuck,” you moan as he rubs against your clit just right.
Your mind flashes back to that video you saw months ago, hips bucking up into Leon imagining him mounting you in the same way. 
“Leon, s’bad, we shouldn’t—ngh, fuck!”
He pulls completely away from you and buries his nose in your pussy, raspy tongue eagerly licking up the slick dripping out of you. 
He growls and looks up at you as he mouths across your swollen clit, letting his rough tongue lap at the bundle of nerves til you’re keening and spreading your legs for him. 
He smirks, “That’s a good little owner, let me taste your sweet little pussy. Fuck, been smelling you for ages and now I can finally eat you out as much as I want.”
“Leon, you’re being such a bad boy right now,” you hiccup a whine, thighs straining to stay open. 
“Nah,” he kisses hour clit and softy licks it over and over and over, “you’re just being a bad girl, need me to put you in your place.”
You whine as he goes back to tongue fucking into your fluttering walls. Reaching down, you softly grasp his hair and rock against his mouth. He grunts and somehow shoves his face even more into your soaked cunt, greedily lapping at you with his rough tongue. 
The arguments you should make die on your tongue as Leon uses his to make you shiver and shake, goosebumps trailing along your body. With a low keening moan, you relax against him, letting him use that rough tongue to lick your cunt until you’re bucking up into his mouth.
He keeps you there, pinned to the entryway carpet as he eats you out for hours, never letting you cum once. By the time your bleary eyes take in the street lamps through your window, Leon’s pulling away from your slick pussy making you whine. 
“Leon, we shouldn’t,” your pussy throbs, entire body strung tight from your denied orgasms. 
“Have to,” his eyes are so dilated they look black, “don’t you wanna help me? Just need it one time.” 
He looms over you, forearms caging in your head, his jaw and mouth covered in wetness as he grinds his dick against your mound. Glancing down you take in just how big Leon is; he’s so hard the head is peaking through his foreskin, dripping precum all over your thighs.  Then, right at his base, you can see the beginnings of a knot forming which makes your pussy ache with want.  
You’re nodding up at him, belatedly answering his question, “Yeah, I wanna help you,” your hands come up to pet his hair, “wanna help my good boy.”
He yanks your blouse off, seams popping and tearing until it’s in shreds around you then snaps your bra off and tosses it away. His mouth eagerly licks and nips at your pebbled nipples making you gasp. 
“Gonna make you feel so good, breed this hot pussy.”
With a growl, Leon flips you over onto your stomach, hands going to your hips to raise your ass up. You try to push up onto your arms, but his broad palm pushes on the middle of your back shoving your upper body down. 
You rock your hips back although there’s not much room from how he’s laying on top of you, back pinned to his broad hairy chest as his cock rubs against your drippy cunt. 
“You wanna breed me?” you tease making him growl and snap at the nape of your neck, “wanna knot my pussy?”
He buries the first few inches of his cock in your pussy making you squeal and arch away. His hands move to keep your hips still as pulls out to thrust back in, sinking his cock all the way inside of you making you squirm in place with a cry.  
“Think it’s funny?” his tone sounds mean as he ruts his fat cock deeper into your pussy making you wince and try to move away again. 
He clucks his tongue and tightly squeezes your hips, “No little owner, you wanted it and you’re gonna get it. Show you how I breed bitches that need a knot.”
“Oh god,” you whine as he bullies his cock even further into your cunt, “Leon s’too much, you won’t fit, I wasn’t made to—“
“This pussy was made for cock,” he scoffs down at you making your body hot all over from his words, “just gotta break you in first; I’ll have you begging for me to knot you.”
His mocking is only making you wetter, pussy walls clenching and pulsing around his cock. 
“S’too much,” you finally gasp out, not stopping yourself from rocking back against his slow thrusts, “shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Yeah?” he snorts, “think it’s dirty? Think it’s wrong to want me to fuck you? I bet this entire time you’ve been thinking, Oh please Leon need your big doggy dick to stuff my needy little pussy.”
You moan loudly at his crude words as he laughs. 
“Like I thought. You like it you dirty little slut. Like my thick doggy cock filling you up?”
“Leon no,” you whimper, eyes rolling back as he grinds against that spongy spot in your cunt that has you moaning nonstop, “s’dirty ‘n you don’t even have a dog di—“
“Shut up,” his canines nip at your skin making you keen, “gotta teach this little pussy who’s the real master here.”
You gasp and keen as Leon stretches your pussy out on his large cock, bottoming out constantly making your cunt clamp down on him from the pain of his tip knocking against your cervix.  
Like earlier, he keeps you pinned to the carpet and slowly fucks your pussy for what feels like hours all while talking filth to you. 
“Mmm knew your pussy would be so good, been humping my fist waiting for my heat so I can fill you up.”
“My sexy fucking owner, letting me knot her pussy, breed her full of my pups.”
“I know, I’m so big for this tiny little pussy  but doesn’t it feel so good? So nice and stretched out?” 
“Leon,” you keen hands scrabbling at the floor, mouth drooling everywhere, “my knees hurt.”
He pauses and gently eases himself out of your cunt. Not giving you time to breathe, he already has you hoisted over his shoulder and carries you into your room. Tossing you onto the bed, he’s back on top of you in a flash burying his dick inside your sopping wet pussy. 
You look down and whine to see the belly bulge his fat cock makes inside your body. 
“Nice and snug,” Leon licks your cheek, “gonna be so tight on my knot.”
“It’s not gonna fit,” you whine up at him, nails digging into to his forearms so hard they’re bleeding. 
You’re already so full, pussy feeling like it’s stretched to the limit, but his knot is pressing against your soaked hole making you rock down into it. 
“Sure it will, little owner,” he laughs, voice gravelly and deep making you shudder and relax around his dick, hole giving just a little around his knot, “that’s why I licked you open so good earlier.”
You moan as he licks across your cheek, “Tongued you deep until you were practically squirting in my mouth.”
“Leon, oh fuck,” you hiccup a moan, tears slipping down your face. 
“So good for me, prettiest cunt I’ve ever seen and it’s all mine,” he grunts, grinding against your fluttering pussy walls as his drippy tip knocks against your cervix, “my owner and her fat pussy are all mine.”
“Leon,” you gasp, “you can’t say that.”
“Sure I can,” he huffs warm air against your neck, his canine teeth nipping at your skin, “I’m gonna knot your tiny pussy and breed you. Give you my pups.”
“Nooo,” you whimper, pussy pulsing and clamping around his cock, knot continuing to press inside. 
“Gonna mount my pretty owner like this every day,” he kisses your neck before licking his way back up to your mouth, “mount my little bitch and give her wet needy cunt my knot.”
“‘M not your bitch,” you finally gasp out around his tongue as he drools and licks into your mouth, “this can’t happen again, Leon.”
“Okay,” he chuckles, “gonna make me use that toy? That fake little plastic pussy? Y’gonna let me knot it in front of you, knowing what I feel like now? I don’t think so little owner.”
He pulls out and flips you over on your stomach, yanking your hips up so your ass is raised, head still down on the mattress. 
“Should be able to fit it this way,” he slaps your ass and you whine, fingers twisting in the sheets. 
His cock plunges back into your sopping wet cunt over and over; his knot teasing you on every thrust until he slowly grinds deep into your fluttering walls. 
“I’m gonna put it in this time, knot you nice and deep,” he pants against your shoulder, mouth drooling all over your skin making you shiver, “gonna knock you up, breed you til it takes.”
You moan and press back against him, mind slow and hazy. He pulls back and then presses forward slowly but insistently and you wail as his knot breaches your clenching hole. His cock’s filling you up so much it feels like he’s in the bottom of your throat. 
“Oh fuck, I’m cumming,” you whimper, pussy gushing around his impossibly huge dick, walls milking his knot repeatedly as he just continues to grind into your cunt. 
“Feels good,” he slurs, licking over your neck and shoulders, “pussy squeezing me so tight.”
You moan weakly, pussy pulsing around his dick as he continues to grind his hips into your ass.
“Gonna spill deep inside my pretty little owner and she just has to take it,” he chuffs against your neck, groaning as he humps deeper into your cunt.
His grunts taper off into low growls as he rocks harder against you. 
“Gonna fuck my pups into you,” he’s snarling into your ear, saliva dripping down the shell onto your jaw making you mewl, “keep this pussy plugged up with my cum all the time—oh.” 
He bites down on your shoulder, sharp teeth breaking your skin making you whine as your body burns with pleasure at the pain. You can fill as hot cum floods your pussy, Leon grunting as he keeps humping against your ass while his knot locks you two together.
His fingers slip from your hip over to your swollen clit and he roughly rubs against the sensitive bud until you’re crying and whining, pussy cumming around his cock again. 
“There we go, such a good owner,” Leon chuckles in your ear, before dipping down to lick over the bite he left, “mmm milk me, want you so full it’s spilling out.”
⋆⋅🐾⋅⋆
You lay there underneath him, feeling exhausted but content. It’s been several hours at this point and you feel like you’re on another plane of existence. Leon has fucked you better than anyone before and you’re definitely addicted to his knot. 
Reaching back, your hand finds his hair and pushing up higher you pet behind his soft fuzzy ears. 
“S’good,” he mouths against your shoulder as he ruts inside your knot plugged pussy.  
Shuddering as his fingers tease against your clit drawing another weak orgasm from your spent body, you whimper and press even closer to Leon. 
“Gonna take such good care of you, little owner,” he kisses you shoulder, “by the time my heat’s over, you’re gonna be my needy little pup.”
Your pussy tightens around him at his words making him whine and nuzzle into your neck. As you lay together, you let your mind drift into a hazy fog. Once Leon’s able to, he gently pulls out of your sore cunt, cum oozing out of your hole. 
His rough tongue licks across your cheek as he rolls you onto your back. 
“So pretty,” he says to himself as he kisses and bites his way down to your chest. 
He laps a path to the swell of your breasts and then softly suckles a hard nipple into his mouth. With a groan, he tugs the hard bud with his teeth before sucking harshly and releasing it with a pop. His mouth drifts over to repeat the same process to the other hard nipple, then moves back; repeatedly teasing your breasts until you’re squirming and whining, grabbing onto his hair to have something to hold onto. 
He finally pulls away with a growl, eyes dark and heated as he noses at your breastbone, “Smell so good.”
He drags his mouth down your body, eagerly licking and biting at your skin until he finally reaches your puffy mound and clit. 
“Taste good too,” his stubbled jaw tickles where he scrapes it against your thigh, “love licking your pussy all over.”
He follows his word by licking a broad stripe across your cum coated pussy, groaning as he brings his hands up to spread your cunt open. His rough tongue laps at your clit in quick little strokes before dipping into your creamy slicked hole. He laps and lathes his tongue all over your pussy, sucking at your clit before dragging his mouth over to your thighs. 
“Gonna mark you up, little owner,” he chuffs against your skin, eyes staring up at you with his tail wagging excitedly behind him. 
“Leon,” you whimper. 
Your fingers twist in the sheets as you cry out. His teeth are buried in the meat of your inner thigh making your clit throb with need.  He sucks harshly at the skin, digging in harder when your thigh trembles under his mouth. 
With a grunt, he lets go but then sinks his teeth into your opposite thigh; this one closer to your pussy, making you buck up into his mouth with a gasp. He hums in satisfaction, lips and teeth working at your skin until it’s sore and bruised.
He pulls back with a grin, “You’re even more pretty now.”
“Feel pretty,” you murmur, eyes glassy with arousal. 
He pants excitedly, hands grasping your thighs to hold you open as he licks and drools all over your pussy. You arch, his mouth making you rock up into the feeling as he noisily eats you out. Letting go of the sheets, your hands reach for his head and accidentally grab onto his ears. He snarls and fucks his raspy tongue up into your fluttering cunt, pressing you down even further so he can lick into you more. 
He pulls himself away before you can cum making you whine. 
“Please, Leon, ‘m so close, be a goody boy and make me cum,” you pout at him, tears pricking at your eyes. 
He crawls up your body, pressing your hands down with his as he rubs his thick cock against your pussy. His head glides through your slick folds til he’s bumping against you clit making you spread your legs wide. 
“You can cum on my knot,” he kisses you, all drool and spit, “wanna mount you again.”
You shudder underneath him and easily let him roll you over. Raising your ass up, you spread your thighs for better leverage. 
“Like this?” you ask a little shy now. 
“Perfect,” he groans, dragging his rough palms down your back to slap you ass, “my pretty owner and her pretty pussy ‘n it’s all mine.”
He sinks his cock into your willing cunt inch by inch, licking and biting at your nape as he rocks himself deeper into you. 
“Gonna breed you so good,” he mutters into your skin, “pussy made for my fat cock, isn’t it? Made to take my knot.”
“Uh huh,” you slur, pussy pulsing and fluttering around his dick as he slowly thrusts into your spasming walls. 
He chuffs and bites your neck a little harder as he snaps his hips hard against your ass. His hand moves from your back to your pussy, softly rubbing and teasing across your swollen clit. 
“Sweet fucking pussy,” he snorts, nose burying itself in your hair, “squeezing me so tight, know it needs a knot.”
“Give it to me, Leon,” you moan loudly, “knot my pussy, please, want it so bad, feels so good.”
His teeth latch onto back of your neck and he pounds into your squelching cunt, knot catching on the rim of your pussy with every thrust. 
“Knot me, Leon, knot me, please, need it,” you’re chanting under your breath , eyes fluttering as your orgasm is fast approaching. 
He can’t say anything with his mouth biting into your neck, but his fingers circle your clit faster, pinching it just right between his fingers making you shake under him. 
“Fuck, right there, please Leon, fuck me,” you rock back against him, wanting his knot to be inside your pussy already, “fuck me, give it to me, give me your knot. Wanna be your little bitch.”
He lets go of your neck with a low howl as he shoves his knot past your twitching hole and ruts hard in your cunt, fat tip grinding against your cervix so hard it’s going to bruise. 
You squeal as he tweaks your clit making your pussy clamp down like a vice around his knot as you cum so hard you see fireworks. Your walls rhythmically milk his cock as he grinds and ruts into your hole. 
“G’nna cum,” he whimpers, sounding drunk. 
“Mmm,” you squirm against him, feeling as hot pulses of jizz fill your pussy. 
He grunts as he spills deep inside you, spurt after spurt of sticky cum shooting out against your cervix as his knot keeps your cunt nice and full. 
“Gonna give you my pups,” he licks at the bite wound on your neck and then the one he gave your shoulder when this all first started. 
“Fuck,” you mewl, thighs tightening as his fingers go back to teasing and circling your clit. 
“Cum for me, little owner,” he goads in your ear, “show me how much you want me to breed this needy pussy.. again and again. And again.”
His fingers circle your clit, the rough pads rubbing you just right making you climax around his cock for the second time that round. You shiver and moan as he keeps teasing your swollen bud. 
“Good girl, so good,” he nips your ear, “my own little pet.”
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zombieunicorngamerzu · 1 year ago
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(Yandere Yellowjackets/Reader)
[Warnings - yandere behavior, Van, Lottie, and Natalie have girlcocks, CNC, penetration, anal, oral, fingering, orgy, creampies, smut]
Ever since the crash, you felt like things changed between you and the team. It was like a switch was flipped and the other girls just went full on Mama bear mode, and not just the Overprotectiveness, but the Clinginess, it got bad. You were the youngest on the Yellowjackets College Soccer Team, only eighteen while the others were either nineteen or twenty with The oldest being Lottie, Natalie, and Taissa, the three of them were twenty.
You knew you were young, you thought Mabye that’s why the team was so overprotective over you, but it got to the point where they babied you. Way too much. Lottie was the most overbearing, well besides Misty, Misty was another level. Both Misty and Lottie insisted on doing everything with you, to bathing you, feeding you, going with you to use the restroom, all you wanted was a ounce of private time, but when you finally got away from one girl, there another was. You felt like they were suffocating you.
“Look, guys I just need to be left alone, please.” You pleaded with Van, Lottie, Taissa, Natalie, Shauna, and Misty, all of them sitting in their spots looking at you so hurt. Lottie stood up first, speaking softly, “Look, baby, we know you want to do things on your own, but we have to keep you safe.” You just shook your head, “No! You won’t even let me go outside alone, your driving me crazy.” Your words really stung everyone, all they tried to do was protect and love you, but all they felt was rejection. Lottie just stepped closer, her arms outstretched, “Baby… just- just let us show you how much we care about you…”
You just shook your head with a hateful glare, you couldn’t stay cooped up in the cabin being babied any longer. You were an adult, so you did what you wanted, you stormed out the door. You didn’t get far at all, Van immediately rushing after you and picking you up by your waist as you flailed, she just grunted and brought you back inside, “Yup, sorry babygirl, but no.” You we’re throwing a fit by the time Van placed you back in front of Lottie who stood with her arms crossed and a scary stern look across her face, “Better after your little fit, baby?”
You just glared and did the only thing you thought, you spit on her. It shocked everyone. You regretted it immediately as soon as you saw Lotties eyes darken and her jaw clench, the others looking scared for you as Lottie shot forward, grabbing you by your neck and forcing you into submission in front of her, her face looming over yours as she spoke in a growl, “I have been nothing but kind and loving and supportive ever since we crashed, I’ve been here for you, taken care of you, and you spit it my face?!”
You couldn’t stop but whimper in fear and regret now, “Lottie I’m sorry-“ She cut you off with a shake or her head, “No, your gonna be a good girl now, you fucking understand?” She growled out as she kicked the back of your knees, forcing you to kneel as she pulled your chin up, “Your gonna take everything we fucking give you without a fucking fight and your gonna fix this goddamn bratty attitude or I swear to god… “ she knelt down to your level, “I will fuck you for days until your a sobbing begging mess for the “nice me” back.”
You just nodded with a whimper, your breathes quick, you’d never seen Lottie so pissed before, it scared you shitless, so you just nodded, watching as she undid her pants, pulling out her cock which was already hard for you while the others watched. “Open your mouth.” She ordered a little softer, cupping your chin while you nodded and parted your lips for her to nudge her cock inside, feeling her length immediately slid to the back of your throat as she moaned, “There’s the good girl I want…” Lottie sighed out as she threaded her fingers in your hair to soothe you while pumping her cock inside your mouth, drool spilling down your chin as you took her down your throat. It didn’t take Lottie long before she was cumming down your throat, her grip on your hair tight before she pulled you off her cock.
She stepped back to let you catch your breath while she undressed, speaking out to everyone, “Everyone strip, we’re gonna show our babygirl why she needs us… and what she gets when she decides to be such a fucking brat.” There was immediate movement as soon as she spoke, everyone listening as Lottie knelt down and helped you undress, kissing your head to calm you as she spoke, “Shh baby, I promise we won’t hurt you,” she caresses your cheek, “We’re just gonna take care of you like we should have a long time ago.”
You just swallowed out of anxiety as you looked over at the others, Taissa already jerking Van off as they kissed, occupied with one another while Shauna was sitting with Nat, the two of them watching you like hawks and Misty who looked elated to just look at you, her hand already in her pants, biting her lip with a blush. Lottie just smirked at Misty, nodding her over which she gladly did, coming over and immediately straddling you, kissing you quick and fiery, making you Yelp at how rushed she was.
Misty was quick, passionate, she was so excited just to touch you as she ground down on your thigh, she was wet and she just wanted to touch you, “Fuck, oh my god, your so pretty, don’t worry, I’ll be gentle… I’ll get you ready for the others.” She smiled before pushing you to lay down, kneeling down between your thighs quickly, spreading your thighs open to bury her face between your thighs, she moaned, getting her first taste of you and she was lost, eating you out like she was starving before her fingers were pushing inside you to find your gspot, she sucked on your clit roughly while curling her finger against your gspot quickly, Misty was surprisingly just a fiery bundle of excitement and pleasured, she focused on you until you came and you swore Misty came in her panties just from getting to make you cum.
You were almost sad when she pulled away but you didn’t get much time to be sad before you were roughly manhandled by Natalie, feeling her hands rolling you onto your tummy and her breasts on your back as she husked in your ear, “Don’t worry baby, I’m gonna fuck you so good your gonna scream.” She just chuckled with a smirk before shoving her cock inside you, making you scream out, you were wet, but she just shoved it in, being rough to the point Lottie voiced out, “Gentle… Natalie, don’t break her.” Nat just chuckled as she dug her nails into your hips, jackhammering her hips into your ass harder, pinning you down, “What if I wanna break her?” Lottie glared at her immediately from her spot which made Natalie roll her eyes, but she did slow down, you were whining and crying already from how sensitive you felt.
Natalie just smiled and slapped your ass, making you squeal and clench around her cock, causing her to groan, her voice husky, “That’s a good fucking girl, taking my cock like this…” she just grunted before reaching down to rub your clit, quickening her thrust as she moaned out, “Now cum on my cock so I can fill you up.” Her words made your eyes widen, groaning out louder at how rough she was fucking you, you could feel her cock slamming deeper inside you, her fingers rubbing your clit rougher which made you build up your orgasm quickly, screaming out as you came around her cock which made her cry out as she slammed into you, spurting hot heavy loads of cum inside you with a groan before slapping your ass and pulling out, leaving you trembling as she ruffled your hair and walked off.
“Christ Nat, how about manners? Some fucking decency?” Taissa spoke out, practically appalled with Natalie just leaving you trembling on the cold floor, you felt Taissa’s hands as she helped you up, pulling you to her chest as she kissed your head, “Van, get some pillows and blankets.” Was all you heard before feeling yourself being laid on a much more comfortable surface, Taissas hands rubbing your tummy and thighs gently while Van just crawled over with a kiss to your knee, “Hey babygirl.” Van smiled as she sat next to you, Taissa putting a pillow under your head as she nodded at Van who settled between your thighs, “Go slow, Van.”
Van just nodded at Taissa’s order, moaning softly as she pressed the head of her cock slowly inside you while rubbing your thighs to help you relax. Both Taissa and Van just seemed more focused on your comfort, they weren’t rushed or rough, they were patient and gentle, focusing on you as Van slowly worked her cock into you, making you moan softly, your eyes fluttering at the feeling, her slow movements felt so much better and Van smiled with pride at the pleasured softer moans you let out, leaning down to kiss your nose as she slowly sped up, making you let out the cutest whine, causing Taissa to shiver, biting her lip as she touched herself and used her free hand to keep your hair out of your eyes. It was a slower buildup to your orgasms, the three of you, but when Van finally got to the point of speeding up her thrusts, breathes shaky as she held your thighs to your chest, sinking her cock in deep as she held your thighs, groaning out loudly, she came inside you, her cock twitching as she made sure to pump in deep so you took every drop.
“God, she’s so perfect.” Van husked out breathlessly as she slowly pulled out, being careful not to hurt you before she leaned down to give you a tender kiss, “Your doing so good baby… so good.” She praised you and it made your heart sing, you really didn’t want Van and Taissa to be done, but they got up, making you whimper before Shauna made her way over, shushing you, “Shh baby, I promise I’m not that scary.” She just gave you a reassuring smile, leaning down to kiss down your stomach before settling between your thighs which made you squirm, you felt too sensitive, it felt like torture when she flicked her tongue over your clit, making her giggle as your hips bucked, “Thats it baby, take what I give you.” She just smiled before attaching her lips to your clit. Gods… Shauna must have known you we’re spent from everyone else, so she just cleaned you up with her tongue mostly, her hands gently rubbing your shaking thighs as she slurped at your pussy, working you to another exhausting but enjoyable orgasm as you came on her tongue.
Shauna carefully let you go after feeling you cum, tasting you was enough for her right now, sitting back to get up and watch as Lottie made her way back over again, you hoped she was the last one. Lottie must have seen how exhausted you were because she just crawled over you, kissing you sweetly with a soft shush, “Shh baby, I know… you did so well, just have to take me now baby, then your done.” She husked out before grabbing your thighs, her hands on the backs of your knees as she pushed them up to your chest, angling her cock at your entrance before pushing in with a deep moan, making your thighs tremble as you moaned brokenly, your poor little hole felt used and sensitive, aching around her cock as she started to thrust.
“Good girl baby, god you look so pretty…” Lottie moaned out as she kissed you harder, groaning and panting against your lips before she pulled out quickly, pining your legs higher before jerking her cock off at your tighter hole below, making you wriggle, “L-Lottie, no please- wait-“ Lottie cut you off by pressing the head of her cock into your tight ass, making you scream out as you felt the stretch, gasping so loud as you felt her thick cock pop into your ass, filling you up so much as she slowly started pumping inside you with such eager moans and growls, “Fuck… yes… this fucking ass- yes baby! Oh god- I’m gonna cum!” Lottie whimpered out as she shoved in deeper, her cock twitching as she groaned out, her voice cracking as her eyes squeezed closed, letting out a cry as she shot her load into your tight little hole, moaning sinfully as she felt your tightness around her cock.
You groaned at the feeling, you felt so full and used at this point, whimpering as Lottie slowly pulled out, her tip popping out of your ass as she let your thighs go, letting you relax as you felt her cum dribble out of your ass. Immediately after Lottie helped sit you up, speaking softly to you, “Baby… your ours now, okay? We love you so much babygirl…” All you could do was nod with a soft whimper as Lottie kissed your forehead before everyone was fussing over you yet again, fighting over who would get to help you bathe next.
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iheartmapi · 3 months ago
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Norwegian Holiday
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Ingrid Engen x Reader
Summary: For the first time, you and your girlfriend go on holiday to her country.
Fluff.
TW: none expect probably kinda shitty depiction of Norwegian culture (I’ve never been there don’t @ me)
Word count: 968
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“The charm’s hidden in the small towns, kjæreste”
The brunette beside you remarked as your train slowly approached it’s destination.
“Well, I’m gonna have to trust you on this one, Ing…”
As the vehicle came to a stop the two of you raised from your seats and gathered your bags, there wasn’t a lot of commotion, after all why should there be when you picked out a tiny town to visit…but well you were enthusiastic about this holiday anyways. Ingrid lead you, though she haven’t been here before she could actually read the signs you passed by.
You fished out your phone from your bag, “Uh babe we rented the hotel on your phone right?” She turned to look at you, as the two of you managed to navigate into one of the towns streets, “I think so, let me check, can you get my phone for me?” You listened and then started the tumultuous act of searching for Ingrid’s phone in your guy’s travel bag, finally you handed the mobile to her.
As Ingrid searched for the reservation, or rather the hotels name so that google maps could help you out, you stood by her, observing the buildings that littered the street, and the might mountains that surrounded the town…this place was almost like a very cozy fairytale “Aha!” Ingrid beamed, were supposed to gooooo…” she turned and turned before pointing in the correct way “We’re supposed to go there” the brunette took hold of your arm and lead the way “So hasty..” you chuckled, “We’ve got no time to lose!” Ingrid beamed.
Thankfully, you didn’t get lost and got to register at the hotel, your rooms were nice, the mattress was the perfect balance between hard and soft, and the decor? Well there wasn’t really much to say about it, it was regular, kind of genderless and beige really.
Of course the moment everything was checked off the two of you got dressed and left the hotel to go exploring, this time leaving google maps behind to just see the town for yourself.
The first thing you and Ingrid thought was necessary to see, was the town’s square.
From the very middle; there was a nicely carved stone fountain, really just plain space, some benches and then the building that surrounded it…shops, cafes, restaurants the likes. “Stand there, I wanna take your picture, pretty girl” Ingrid smiled, you cheerfully pranced around to pose in front of the fountain for Ingrid’s phone’s lenses, after a couple clicks the two of you continued on strolling around.
“Feeling the Norwegian spirit already?” Ing playfully nudged you, you smirked “Definetily, oh I need to get me some kitschy Viking souvenir!” At that comment she scoffed “So stereotypical of you” you just winked at your girlfriend and said “Whatever you say, Viking lady” to which she just nudged you again and you laughed.
Trying Norwegian food was a must have on your list, so not too soon after you made your way to a restaurant, your eyes skimmed across the menu, trying to pronounce the foreign to you words as Ingrid had a laughing fit at your butchered words.
Then with some help from Ingrid you chose a dish called “Kjøttkaker med brunsaus”, a seemingly simple recipe. The waiter soon brought your orders to the table and left you to live this delicious moment.
You stick your fork into the meat on the plate and took a dramatic breath “Here goes nothing…” you munched on the meat cakes, wanting to savour the taste..after a moment of thoughtfulness you decided on “This is quite good actually”
Ingrid’s mouth curved upwards “I’m happy you like it” before continuing on eating her own meal, “You’ll have to make this for me when we get back home, Ingy!” You remarked joyfully, “Alright alright” she laughed at your liveliness “Calm your horses and finish eating first”
Towns square, restaurant and now a souvenir shop because you begged Ingrid to see it when you spotted it…you scanned the Viking-y souvenirs, from hats to cups, there were many things to choose from…Ingrid herself paced around the building, observing the assortment of the shop before returning to you, “So?” She asked “You getting anything?” You turned to Ingrid with a comical seriousness “I’m torn between the Viking hat and the Viking cup” Ingrid raised an eyebrow “I’m assuming you’re expectantly waiting for me to say you can get both?” You nodded “There’s no limit for what you want babe, if you want it buy it” you reached for the “viking” hat and put it on your head “I was afraid the amount of kitsch I wanted would annoy you” Ingrid just rolled her eyes and patted your now covered head “It’s you, I couldn’t get mad even if I wanted to.”
So you bought the things you wanted, put them in your bag for walking around and went on with your exploration of the small town. The rest was really just you two appreciating the views and architecture, or entering places you thought looked interesting..
The day flowed smoothly and soon you found yourself sitting on a bench with a view of the lake by the town, waffles in your and Ingrid’s hands.
“This is like…so pretty it’s crazy” you said as you munched on your waffle
“Chew before you speak babe…” Ingrid sighed at your childishness (but with a smile on her face)
“fine fine!” You finished the piece and swallowed “Now as I said, the views are crazy here”
“I’m glad you’re enjoying Norway” your girlfriend smiled even wider, her eyes crinkling “You know I care about your happiness the most”
“Oh don’t you make me blush…” you added “You’re already outshining this landscape” you winked before getting back to devouring your waffle
“You’re such a dummy…”
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paarthunaxx · 5 months ago
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Hey! I was wondering if you could write about G!pLarissa and teacher!reader in which they get into an especially heated argument in Larissa's office and one thing leads to the other and they're all over each other. Basically angry sex on Larissa's desk and reader is very needy and sensitive and ofc Larissa is all into that
(bonus if there's mirror sex, we all know how many mirrors Larissa has in her office)
Thank you in advance
𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 IT MAKES ME CRAZY WHEN YOU ACT SO CRUEL — 18+
larissa weems x fem! reader
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word count: 2.9k
status: completed
summary: You are a teacher at Nevermore Academy. After working late grading essays in Larissa’s office, she suggests you take a nap. When you wake up, an argument ensues and Larrissa takes her emotions out on you… but not particularly in a bad way.
tags: angst, smvt, girlpenis!larissa, angry sex, top larissa, mirror sex, slight degradation, slight humiliation, size difference, p in v, face fvcking, name slvt, name wh0re
note: thank u so much for the request anon 🥺 i hope u like it << 33
read on ao3!
The old record player set up in the corner of Larissa’s office quietly spins out the voice of Judy Garland, filling the otherwise quiet room with a sense of serenity.
You sit across from the headmistress with a pile of essays on your lap and a red pen in hand. As you leaf through the pages, you make little marks and corrections here and there with your brow furrowed in concentration.
Larissa leans over her desk and types away on her laptop. The sound brought about by the gentle touch of her fingertips against the keys makes it a struggle for you to stay awake. It provides a soothing ambience paired with the soft spin of the record player. Your head droops every few minutes and you have to shake off the sleepiness each time before going back to the papers.
“Feeling tired, there?” Larissa teases and gives your leg a nudge with the pointed toe of her high heeled shoe.
“A little,” You admit around a laugh and stretch your arms out above your head. “What time is it?”
She turns her attention back down to the screen of her laptop to check the time in the corner. “Just after eleven.”
“Christ.” An exhale escapes your lips in a soft puff and you shake your head. “I don’t think I ever got tired this early before taking up my position here.”
“Being surrounded by teenagers all day every day has a certain way of… sucking the life out of you,” She huffs out a soft laugh as her painted red lips turn up to reveal a pearly white smile. “It seems their youth drains ours.” Larissa regards you with a fond stare as your eyes begin drooping again, lifting a perfectly manicured hand to stifle another sound of amusement. “Why don’t you take a break, dear? Have a nap. You’re more than welcome to use the couch, and I’ll wake you in an hour.”
Your line of sight trails after her hand as it gestures to the red velvet couch positioned beneath a large mirror. The few times you’ve had the displeasure of sitting on it during your time teaching at Nevermore, it has been rigid and uncomfortable. It always left your ass aching and your thighs cramping. But in that moment, it might as well be the softest cloud you’ve ever laid eyes upon, so inviting and warm.
You hesitate for a moment, feeling a spark of fear deep down that this might be some kind of test from Larissa to decide if you really are fit to be a teacher. However, as you study her sparkling blue eyes, you see only sincerity and concern shining in them. “Thank you,” You concede, ignoring your fears as you stand up from your chair. A groan escapes you as your joints make popping sounds in complaint at the sudden movement, your aching back being the loudest. “You sure you’ll wake me up in an hour?”
“Promise. Get some sleep,” Larissa hums absentmindedly and waves you off before turning her attention back to her laptop screen.
After another brief pause, you set the pile of essays down neatly on her desk and cross the room to the couch. You reach out and run your fingertips across the velvet, feeling the smooth material under your skin before giving in and sinking down on it. Larissa doesn’t glance in your direction again as you slip out of your shoes, set them neatly to the side and curl up in a little ball on the couch. It doesn’t take long before your eyes slip shut and you drift off.
Incoherent dreams flick through your mind like the channels of a television as you nap on the couch. After a while, your subconscious begins to grow suspicious that you have been asleep for too long. It feels like there should be an alarm ringing to wake you up, or something. You can’t quite remember. But you force your mind through the haze of sleep and make yourself wake up, anyway.
Blinking awake, you find yourself still curled up on the couch in Larissa’s office. It takes a second for your tired brain to orient itself and remember what you’re doing there. Your gaze flickers to the stack of essays on Larissa’s desk, and you groan softly when you’re reminded of how much you still have left to do.
“Hey,” You mumble and push yourself up into a sitting position, rubbing your eyes with the back of your hand. “Has it been an hour yet?”
You watch as Larissa glances down to the time displayed on her laptop and her whole body stiffens. “Um…”
“What?”
“It… Well, it has certainly been an hour.”
She avoids your eyes and shifts uncomfortably in her seat, her long fingers drumming nervously against the dark wood of her mahogany desk. Her throat bobs as she swallows hard, and you find yourself growing nervous as you watch her squirm.
“Larissa…” You begin calmly. “How long has it been?”
Larissa’s teeth sink into her ruby lower lip and she exhales through her nose before turning in her seat to face you. “Three hours.”
“Three hours?” You bolt up from the couch, almost tripping over your abandoned shoes in the process as you hurry over to her desk and scoop up the essays. “Larissa, I have to be up in three more hours, I don’t have time to get everything done!”
“Well,” Larissa scoffs and folds her arms across her chest. “Perhaps you should have thought of that. You should have been more prepared.”
You gape at her, your grip tightening around the red pen in your hand so tight it seems in danger of snapping in half and spraying ink everywhere. “You told me to nap! You promised you would wake me in an hour! I would have been able to get it done if you had!”
“Don’t blame your time management faults on me!” Larissa snaps. “The time simply slipped away from me, because I was busy working while you—”
“Don’t you dare!” You cut her off with a frustrated growl. “You promised!”
“And I apologise for that, but I was simply too busy to pay attention to—”
“Yeah. You’re always too busy to pay attention to anything, aren’t you?” You mutter before letting out an incredulous laugh.
Larissa’s gaze turns cold as she narrows her azure eyes at you. “What is that supposed to mean?” She forces out between gritted teeth.
“It means,” You pause to take a deep breath. “I have to sit in your office until one in the morning every single night just to get a sliver of your attention. For you to even notice I’m there. And I ask one thing of you, at your suggestion—”
“Is that what you’re pouting about?” Larissa curls her lip in a sneer as she stands from her chair slowly, towering over you as she rounds the desk to where you’re standing. “I don’t pay enough attention to you, hmm? The poor little baby isn’t getting enough attention?”
“Don’t call me a baby,” You warn, your hands clenching into fists by your sides.
“Then stop acting like one!” She raises her voice, practically snarling as she stares down at you. Looking at you like you’re merely a student she has to discipline. “Grow up! You don’t need my attention to survive, and I don’t have the time to constantly give it to you. If that upsets you, then get out of my office and go find someone else who can pander to you all hours of the day.”
You flinch a little at her words, but the hint of vulnerability only flashes across your face before the pure rage returns and you spit, “Fuck you.”
Larissa suddenly grabs your shoulders and shoves you against the desk. The papers of your essays fly everywhere, her large hands holding you in a vice grip. “Is that what you want to do? Fine,” She seethes.
“Huh—?” You start, but she immediately cuts you off and crashes her lips against yours. At first you can only let out a surprised squeak in response, but it barely takes a second before your resolve melts and you lean into it. You’re so fucking pathetic.
Her lips meet yours in what feels more like a battle than anything intimate or loving. Unable to control yourself, your hands roam over every inch of her you can reach, grabbing and squeezing at her soft body. She fights for control when you start kissing her back eagerly, her tongue slipping past the seam of your lips and exploring your mouth with urgency. You’re only just beginning to get into the kiss when she pulls away. One hand moves from your shoulder to sink into your hair, gripping at the strands and using them to yank your head back. The action elicits a sharp moan from you as she tugs your lower lip between her teeth and sucks before moving to attack your neck.
Larissa’s other hand keeps you pinned against the desk. When it starts exploring your body with rough squeezes, she uses her own body to keep you trapped in place instead. “Little desperate whore,” She huffs against your throat before sucking a large mark into the soft flesh. “Look at what you do to me.”
Before you can respond, she pulls back and spins you around, pressing your front into the desk and bending you over it. Her larger frame leans over you, caging you against the desk as she lets out soft pants into your ear. “Gonna sit there and whine if you don’t get enough attention, hmm?” She mocks, her hips grinding against your behind. You gasp at the feeling of something hard pressing into you, and immediately try to push back into it and get some friction. “Ah, ah,” She scolds, pulling your hair again. “Did I say you could move?”
“No,” You whisper, your mind going fuzzy with the inability to concentrate on anything. The feeling of her tugging your skirt up only makes that feeling grow tenfold, and you can hardly control your breath as it shakes with anticipation.
“You want this?” Larissa asks in a mutter, pausing just until you nod desperately. “Of course you do,” She snorts. “You little slut.”
She pushes your panties to the side and rubs two fingers over you, teasing your clit and sliding them between your folds. “You’re so wet already,” She laughs in your ear before leaning in to suck at the lobe. “So needy. So… Pathetic.” All you can do is nod in agreement and gasp at the sensation of her teasing you, her fingers circling your clit before pushing inside you. The little whines coming from you only make her laugh harder, the sound purely mocking as she spreads you open on her large fingers. Your hips begin to twitch with the need to push back on the digits, but you force yourself to stay still. You’ve already been told off for moving.
She fucks you on her fingers with fast, deep pumps for another minute before sliding the soaked digits out of you. She ignores your sounds of protest, gives a warning swat to your ass, and reaches back to start pulling her own pants open. You swallow hard and lick your dry lips, fighting a losing battle against the urge to glance back and peek at her. Before you can even look over your shoulder, you feel the head of her cock starting to press against your entrance, and squeak when she suddenly slams it inside you.
“Larissa—” You gasp, your head dropping down as you try to wrap your mind around the sudden fullness.
“Shhh,” She nips at your earlobe. With a tight grip on your waist, she pulls out halfway before shoving back in. Her little groans in your ear betray how it makes her feel, even as she tries to keep her composure.
Larissa’s body presses you further into the desk until her breasts are flush against your back and your own are squished against the wood. You can’t resist pushing back anymore, and this seems to set her off into a quick, brutal rhythm.
“Christ,” She moans, her hips slapping against your ass as she fucks you the way you deserve. “Fuck, that’s so good. You’re so tight.. So warm. This is what you wanted, isn’t it? For me to give you attention?”
“Yes,” You gasp, resting your cheek against the cold wood of the desk and taking everything she gives you. “Yes. Gods, yes, this is what I wanted.”
“Then why didn’t you say that, hmm? Instead of pouting and throwing a fit like a child,” She punctuates those words with a harsh thrust, making you cry out as you melt in her hold.
“M’sorry,” You whimper, your hands desperately clawing at the desk for some support as she drags your body back into each hard snap of her hips.
“You’re not sorry at all, pet,” Larissa giggles, before continuing in a low, scolding purr right in your ear. “Don’t scratch up my desk. It was very expensive.”
Her cock plunges deep inside you with every sharp thrust, hitting that perfect spot over and over and over again. You can’t hold back anymore and allow yourself to meet her halfway each time, angling your hips to take her deeper.
“Desperate little thing,” Larissa laughs between panting moans. She pulls your hair to bring your face away from the desk while her other hand grips at your chin and turns your head to the side. “Look at yourself in the mirror, darling. Do you see how needy you look? So cute.”
The sight of yourself in the mirror brings about a mixture of embarrassment and exhilaration. You look completely wrecked. Your face is flushed and sweaty, your eyes rolling back a little each time she pushes her length deeper inside you. It looks as though your mind has completely broken and you’ve fallen apart, leaving you a whimpering mess in her hold. She, on the other hand, doesn’t have a single white hair out of place. She looks perfect and composed, as always.
“Poor thing, you look so fucked out already,” Larissa coos and slips her hand over your stomach, letting it trail down between your legs. Part of you wants to stare at where your bodies connect, but the larger part wins out and you squeeze your eyes shut out of humiliation. Larissa growls softly when she sees this and pinches your clit between her index and middle finger. “Eyes open, pet. I want you to watch yourself being pushed over the brink.”
Her warning words force your eyes to snap back open, no matter how embarrassing it feels.
“Good girl,” Larissa whispers and kisses affectionately at the back of her neck as her fingertips rub you quickly. The sensation of her fingers against your clit paired with her thrusting inside you shoves you into a climax almost instantly, and she lets out a delighted sound when she feels you clenching around her. She fucks into you like its her job, the feeling of you cumming on her cock sending her into a frenzy. She kisses and sucks at your neck, leaving you a mess of red lipstick and hickeys. Your body twitches hard as it tingles from head to toe, any remaining concentration leaving you completely as you whine and moan through your climax. Larissa’s fingers continue to work over you until your body relaxes and goes completely pliant against the desk.
“That’s my good girl…” She praises and kisses your neck one more time before pulling out of you. When you whine in protest at the sudden emptiness, she chuckles and shushes you, using her hand in your hair to force you down on your knees in front of her. “Let’s put that whiny little mouth to some use, hmm?” She whispers, waiting for you to part your lips before she shoves her cock down your throat. You choke at first, but when she pets your hair and waits patiently for you to catch your breath, you manage to relax and take her whole length.
Larissa only lasts a couple of thrusts down your throat before pulling back to spill onto your tongue with a series of soft moans. She strokes herself through it, coating your mouth in her release and laughing breathlessly as you swallow down every last drop.
“So good for me…” She praises when she’s spent, carding her fingers through your sweat-damp hair. “Come here, my sweetheart,” She helps you back to your feet and tugs you close, kissing your forehead.
You melt against her with a content sigh and loop your arms around her waist. Your body shakes from exertion as you snuggle into her chest, nuzzling your nose between her breasts.
“Happy now? Is that enough attention for you, darling, or do you need more?” She teases with a fond smile, encasing you in her long arms and keeping you close.
A mischievous little smile tugs at the corners of your lips and you whisper breathlessly, “...More.”
She tips her head back with a bright laugh, and shakes her head. “Cheeky little thing…” She hums and lets go of you before sinking down onto her knees. She lavishes a few kisses to your thighs, her lips creeping closer to your pussy as both hands rest on your ass, tugging you closer until you’re positioned right over her face.
“....Very well.”
389 notes · View notes
multifandombitxh · 2 years ago
Text
Keep It Down
Pairing: Din Djarin x Fem!Reader
Genre: Smut/Angst with some fluff sprinkled in there ✨
Warnings: Self pleasure, caught in the act, jealous/protective Din, 18+
AN: some good ol Jealous!Din for the girlies 😌 It's such a stereotypical fic gang I'm gonna be so real with you lmao. It's also a long one so prepare for the worst typos you've ever witnessed.
PS I haven't seen S3 yet but I got back into the hype 💁‍♀️
18+ minors dni
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It had been quite some time since you were able to have a moment to yourself. So long, in fact, that you couldn't remember the last time you did anything for yourself that was even remotely relaxing. You had been stuck on one mission for months, scouring the corners of each galaxy for a specific target with an unreasonably high bounty over their head. Din kept telling you it would be worth it in the end, but you were beginning to doubt that sentiment about two months into the search.
After a very pleasant visit to Alderaan, you were able to snag something for yourself to help with some much needed "stress relief".
You did your best to hide it from Din, considering you really didn't want him to know you'd just purchased a vibrating self massager. They were hard to come by, so when you found a merchant that sold them discreetly, you knew you had to take the chance. After it was all said and done, and Din asked where you'd been while he was busy getting information about the target, it was hard to explain to him where you'd gone.
"And where have you been this whole time?" He asked as you approached him outside of a local bar.
"I was, um, chatting up some locals," You lied, trying to maintain some semblance of composure as he stared you down. "Wasn't able to find anything about the target. I don't think he's been here."
"Well, while you were busy wasting your time, I was able to find one of his distant relatives," He explained, "Turns out he has such a high bounty for more than just murder, he's a real piece of shit in the eyes of his family. She said she knows where he might be."
"Yeah? Where?"
"Tatooine."
You scoffed. "That's not far."
"Which means we need to leave soon," He explained, "There's a crew heading there in just a few hours."
"Okay, so who's the crew?" You asked, eyeing him suspiciously. "Why can't we just go on our own? The ship could make it."
"It could, but not that quickly," He sighed, "Their ship is a little more advanced. It'll get us there faster."
You shrugged, raising an eyebrow at him. "Have you talked to them?"
He nodded once and began to walk off, likely in the direction of the meeting place. "I have. That distant relative? She knows these guys, let me talk to one of them over her communicator. They said they'll take us there, no questions asked."
You followed closely, trying to match his pace. "I find that hard to believe."
"You find a lot of things hard to believe," He teased, nudging your shoulder with his own. "It's kept us out of a lot of trouble. Always liked that about you."
You tried not to react to the compliment- the last thing he needed was an ego boost- but internally, it made your heart flutter and your stomach feel heavy. You opted not to respond to this, hoping he wouldn't press.
Unfortunately, that only made it worse.
"Would it kill you to take a compliment every once in a while?" He asked, his tone annoyed.
"It might," You replied with a smile, "Never done it, so I don't know."
"Maybe you should try it some time," He scoffed back at you, causing you to roll your eyes.
Your relationship with Din was complicated to say the least. You knew from the start you had some kind of attraction to him- what kind, you weren't sure, but it was strong and unrelenting. His voice was dangerously enticing, leaving you shivering any time he spoke just above a whisper, and the mystery of his face only added to the excitement. You had no clue what he looked like under that helmet, but you didn't care at this point. It never occurred to you to fantasize about his appearance- the way he carried himself, his voice, his confidence, everything about him struck you more.
But you'd be lying if you said you weren't a little bit curious about the color of his eyes.
When the two of you finally arrived at the crew's headquarters, you gave him a skeptical look. The warehouse before you was old, rusting and decaying in every corner. It was discolored, looking to have once been a pale green. The roof had caved in in several places, and the stairs to the roof were a death trap waiting to collapse on any unsuspecting victims. Din took note of your expression, waving his hand once to dismiss it.
"Not a word," He commanded, "I don't want to hear it."
"All I'm saying-"
"Don't make me tell you twice, Y/N. I already know what you're going to say, so zip it."
Frowning, you folded your arms over your chest in a pout. You followed him inside, passing through a creaky metal door that you were sure would be better off as scrap metal. Din led the way, checking corners and keeping one hand close to his blaster. As you entered the warehouse, the smell of burning rubber invaded your nostrils, causing you to make a face. As you rounded a corner, a large, shiny silver ship sat in the center of the large open space.
It stood out like a sore thumb, clean and sparkling among the rubble. You both exchanged looks, watching as three people stood around the ship and chatted away. They didn't seem hostile, but you knew better than to underestimate them. You approached carefully, keeping an eye out for any others who might be hiding nearby. One of them took notice of you as you stepped under a light, giving you away.
"Hey, the Mandalorian is here!" He called out, waving excitedly at the two of you. The man was tall and thin, barely any meat on his bones but a smile that was charming in its own way. "He's got a friend! Come on over, you guys!"
Din glanced over at you slowly, and you returned his look with a shrug. As you walked over to the group, you took in the remaining two of the crew; a woman with short, dark hair, several tattoos, and a frown that would scare off anyone. The other, a man of similar stature to the first, wore round, thick glasses, and was covered in what appeared to be oil.
"Lera said you'd be coming soon," The man said, "What are your names? I'm Dom, that's Starsei, and this guy over here is my twin, Arus."
"Y/N," You greeted, offering a small smile, then gesturing to Din. "He won't tell you his name, just call him whatever you like."
Din nodded, affirming your words. Dom watched the two of you for a moment, a huge grin still plastered to his face. A fourth member of the crew emerged from underneath the ship, covered in more oil than Arus. His dark, straight hair clung to his forehead and his mouth hung open as he breathed heavily. Oil stuck to his bare torso as he offered the two of you a wave.
"And that's Nox," Dom said, an annoyed tone to his voice.
You couldn't help smiling at Nox- he was handsome, likely more handsome than most- with a wide jaw, dark stubble, and his body toned similarly to that of a God. You shifted your weight as he locked eyes with you, shooting you a half smile that gave you butterflies. Din stood beside you, moving closer as he noticed the tension that hung between you and the mystery man. Nox took note of Din as well, offering him a full smile.
"Have any trouble getting here?" He asked, his voice just as dreamy as he looked.
"No," Din said simply.
An uncomfortable silence fell over the room as the two of them held each other's gaze, as if a silent conversation was happening just between them. You cleared your throat and looked over to Dom, giving him a warm smile. "So, um, when do we leave?"
"As soon as you're ready," He replied, "We were just finishing up repairs on the ship, so you're welcome to head inside and make yourselves at home. We'll all be roommates for the next two days, so we'll do a big dinner tonight to get to know each other better."
"Sounds great," You said, your voice as friendly as you could muster. There was a clear rivalry brewing between Nox and Din, and you were trying to do everything in your power to alleviate the tension. "We'll head inside."
Din ignored you, still staring at Nox. Irritated, you grabbed his upper arm and began dragging him toward the ship, smiling at the others along the way. Nox caught your eye again and you smiled, hoping he wasn't intimidated by Din too much. Once inside the ship, you all but slammed Din against a wall once you were out of earshot of the others.
"What is wrong with you?" You asked.
"What's wrong with me?" He replied, his voice filled with anger. "What's wrong with you?"
"I haven't done anything wrong!" You said, shouting in a whisper. "You're the one acting crazy!"
"Oh, I'm the crazy one?" He laughed, "I'm not the one making doe eyes at strangers."
Your mouth hung open in shock. "Excuse me?"
"You heard me, Y/N," He went on, "This is serious. We don't know them. If he tries something because you couldn't help yourself, and everything goes sideways, this was all for nothing."
"Why do you care?" You asked, becoming annoyed with his reasoning. "He's hot, give me a break! I'm allowed to think people are hot, Din!"
He let out a deep sigh, shaking his head. "We're on a mission, Y/N. This isn't the time."
"Well, it's been a long mission," You huffed, raising an eyebrow at him. "And I'm bored. The least I can do is have a little fun."
In truth, you hadn't even been planning on doing anything with Nox other than admire his good-looks. Your feelings for Din ran deep, and you weren't about to ignore those feelings for one good looking guy. If anything, you were hoping this would show Din that you weren't his, and that he had no claim over you. Maybe, just maybe, it would be enough for him to come clean about his own feelings.
If he even had any for you, that was.
Once everyone was loaded up onto the ship and you'd set off, you found yourself relaxing on a very comfy couch in a very cramped lounge area. The ship was dimly lit, offering little light to help you find your way around, so you opted to sit down and wait until someone told you to do something. After a while, Arus found you, and decided to sit with you.
"So, uh, is your partner, um... Okay?" He asked quietly.
"He's fine," You said, waving your hand.
"What was he so angry about?"
You shrugged, trying not to give away what was really going on between you. "Beats me."
You decided to get to know Arus a bit, finding out that he and Dom were engineers that escaped from the Empire many years ago after faking their deaths. You learned that Starsei is their pilot, and she seems standoffish because she doesn't often speak. She was a prisoner of the Empire, who helped Dom and Arus escape many years ago. Nox is their newest recruit; also an engineer, but mostly specializes in communications. He also used to be a smuggler.
After a while of chatting back and forth, Nox joined the party, sitting between you and Arus.
"Seems like the Mandalorian isn't having a great time if I'm not mistaken," Nox joked, glancing over at you. "Thought he was gonna slit my throat after I saw him in the hall just now."
"He'll warm up to everyone eventually," You said with a small smile, "He's a little hesitant about new people."
"So, how long have you two been together?" Nox asked, wiggling his eyebrows at you. Shock took over your features and you laughed awkwardly at the gesture.
"We're not together," You stated, "We've been working together for a long time now. Maybe a year."
Nox seemed to ponder your response for a moment as Dom entered the room, knocking on the wall to get everyone's attention.
"Arus, we need you up front," Dom said in a soft voice. "Star could use some help."
Arus excused himself, leaving you with Nox in silence. You tried to relax, sinking into the sofa as much as you could to appear as non-threatening as possible. Nox did the same, leaning back and yawning as he crossed his arms over his broad chest. The only sound was the rush of the ship, shaking softly as it dove through space.
"I want to know more about you," Nox said after a moment, turning to meet your gaze. His green eyes were soft, but lidded. "Who is Y/N, exactly? Other than the Mandalorian's pet, I mean."
"I am not his pet," You scoffed, laughing slightly and hitting his upper arm before looking away. "We're friends, that's all."
"You might want to check on that with him," He replied, "He was ready to kill me earlier just for looking at you. I don't think that's a normal thing to do for someone who's just a friend."
Nox's hand came to rest on your knee, his palm open fully and his thumb gently stroking back and forth. "If I'm being honest, I think he could tell why I was looking at you, and I think that pissed him off."
When you met his gaze, a pit formed in your stomach. Nox was handsome, and charming, and clearly making a move on you. But... Something was wrong. It felt wrong. There was something about the way his hand felt on your knee that made your skin crawl, his voice made you cringe, and the entire setting was uncomfortable. It was hard to pinpoint exactly why, until you thought a little harder about it.
He wasn't Din.
"I... Think I should go," You said, standing from the couch and turning back to face him briefly. "Look, you seem nice. But I'm... I'm not interested."
He smirked up at you. "I knew it. You totally have a thing for each other."
Dom appeared in the doorway again, a huge grin on his face. "Who's ready to eat?"
-
After what felt like hours, you were finally able to step away from dinner to your quarters- Starsei showed you the way- closing the door behind you. You removed your gear, tossing it to the floor and sighing in relief at the loss of the heaviness. Removing the massager from your pocket, you walked to the bathroom and gave it a good wash, not trusting it after being in your pocket all day.
Once you returned to the room, you actually took in what it looked like. Star had told you that you and Din would have to share one room, which hadn't bothered you until you realized there was only one bed that sat in the center of the room, facing the door. It looked big enough for both of you, but still, you knew it would be an awkward conversation to have once he arrived.
The room was dimly lit- much like the rest of the ship- one wall light sitting above the door and casting a reddish glow over the entire room. The bed looked uncomfortable, with a thin, gray blanket sitting atop the mattress and two equally thin pillows where your heads would rest. It wasn't home, by any means, but it was a place to sleep.
With that, you laid down in the bed, shivering from anticipation. It had been a long time since you'd had enough privacy for something like this. Not bothering to remove your pants, you slowly lowered your hand past the waistband and sighed softly as the blue silicone material grazed your skin. With one press of the button, you felt yourself melting into the hard mattress, all of your worries fading away with the soft sound of buzzing.
Your breathing began to pick up in pace and you wriggled slightly as the sensation became more and more intense. It was getting hard to suppress the sounds you were making, so you bit down on your lip to try and stifle whatever noises threatened to come out. A shaky breath managed to worm its way out of you, hitching in your throat as it started to escape.
Thoughts of Din infiltrated your imagination, and you didn't try to suppress them as they came. You thought about the sound of his voice, talking you through the pleasure and egging you on. A wave of energy passed through you and went straight to your core, wetness beginning to pool. You thought about his hands pinning you down as he had his way with you, panting and sweating above you. It was almost too much, and it felt like the room was spinning.
Closing your eyes, you began to focus on finding release, waves of pleasure flooding your body with each passing second. Your breathing picked up in pace, and it was getting harder and harder to stop the tiny moans that escaped your throat. With a flick of your wrist, the massager hit the perfect spot, pulling a sharp gasp out of you. Just as it left your lips, a large, warm hand clamped over your mouth.
Terror filled your body and replaced all sense of satisfaction, forcing you to rip your hand out of its hiding place and your eyes to shoot open. Din hovered over you, one hand covering the lower half of your shocked face while the other pressed into the mattress beside your head. He was missing most of his armor, his helmet the only piece that remained. Adrenaline shot through your veins, and you struggled against his hold.
"Sshh," He shushed you, holding a single finger up to the part of his mask where his lips would be. "Everyone in this quadrant is gonna hear you if you don't keep it down."
Confusion replaced the shock, your eyebrows drawing together as you breathed heavily through your nose. He seemed to see the questions in your eyes, and you could swear you could hear the smirk in his voice when he spoke again.
"I could hear you from down the hall," He explained, "Thought maybe you were... With someone. But it looks like I was wrong."
You shot him a glare, thinking back to the evening you spent with Nox and how it must have implicated something different to Din.
"I don't have to help you, if you don't want me to," He reasoned, the hand covering your mouth beginning to lessen the pressure it was applying. "I just don't want you to get caught by the others. Just say the word, I'll walk away and we'll never speak of this again."
You wished you could see his face to make a better decision about what his intentions were, but with the helmet in the way, it made it impossible. You thought back to the feelings you were having just minutes ago, and felt excitement bubble up in your gut. Despite the surprise, you wanted this. Your expression softened under his gaze, and you felt your body relax under his touch.
"The way you're looking at me... Should I take that as a yes?" He asked, tilting his head to one side. "You want me here? You don't want me to go find your little friend, do you?"
You shook your head slowly and a soft, amused laugh filtered through his helmet, sending a shiver down your spine.
"You wanna give that thing to me?" He asked, gesturing with his head toward the massager. You lifted your hand and placed it in his, your body beginning to shake at the idea of what was about to happen. "That's my girl."
His words sent a shockwave down to your middle, causing a soft whine to escape from behind his hand. His girl. Remembering to keep you quiet, he pressed down on your mouth again, shaking his head.
"As much as I want to hear every little sound you're going to make," Din said, his voice sounding strained. "Can't have anyone else listening in, got that? You're mine tonight."
You nodded.
"Glad to see you can follow orders somewhere, at least," He joked, the laughter in his voice making you shiver.
With one hand he managed to remove your pants, lowering them to just below your knees, the cool air hitting you and making you shake. He took note of this and pressed the massage straight against your clit, keeping it there, but not turning it on. Frustration began to build as he teased you, running the material over the spot slowly and gently. Your brows drew together at this and you gave him another deadly look.
"Give me a break, I've been waiting for this for a long time," He said, sounding breathless as he looked you up and down. "You have more scars than I thought you would. Still, you're as perfect as I imagined."
With wide eyes you wiggled free from the hand that covered your mouth. "Are you saying you've thought about me like this?" You asked, your voice strained.
"Quiet," He commanded, shoving you back down into the mattress with his free hand. "I already told you, the others might be listening."
"Seriously?" You questioned, exasperated. "Did you think I wasn't gonna react to that?'
"I knew you would," He replied, gripping your jaw with his fingers. "I just wanted to distract you so I could do this."
You opened your mouth to respond, but were quickly silenced by his hand once more as he pressed the button on the massager, effectively turning it on. A hearty groan filled your throat as your head fell back, Din's hand keeping you in place. Your knees shook as he worked you over, circling the massager before pressing it against your clit again. Whines and moans were easily muffled by his hand.
Without thinking twice, you reached out and gripped his bicep, your fingertips digging into the soft flesh that hid beneath his shirt. He grunted at your touch, lowering his face closer to yours as you squirmed beneath him. "Eyes on me, yeah? Keep your eyes on me, Y/N."
With that, you reached up to touch the side of his helmet- a silent plea for him to remove it. You begged with your eyes, since you couldn't with your mouth, hoping he would give you what you wanted so you could look him in the eye. He hesitated, his movements slowing as you pressed your hand to his helmet. Sighing, he removed his hand from your mouth, instead placing it to your cheek. "I can't, you know that."
"Please," You blurted, all dignity vanishing from your body as you begged him to show his face. "You know me-"
The massager hit a rather sensitive spot, causing you to cry out and lurch upwards. Just as it began to leave your mouth, his hand was quick to silence you.
"You've gotta be more careful than that," He scolded, pressing it harder up against you. Your back arches off the bed, causing your chest to graze his. Sighing shakily, he kept the massager stationary, sending wave after wave of pleasure washing over you. You'd all but forgotten your desire to lock eyes with him, your climax on the horizon and taking up all priority in your brain.
"That's it," He encouraged, drawing out each word. "You're being so good for me."
Broken whimpers spilled past his hand, and he didn't stop them this time. Instead, he doubled down, maintaining the same position that was driving you closer and closer to the edge. It was within reach now, just a few seconds more and you'd be coming undone beneath him. Din could sense this somehow, his face mere inches from yours.
"I know, I know," He mewled, breathing hard behind his mask. "Be a good girl, now. Give me what I want."
His words were the tipping point, sending you flying over the edge. Your climax crashed through you, your head falling back against the mattress as several stifled moans filled the air. Din hummed as you finished, as if satisfied by his work. He never wavered, his helmet stationary, a sure sign that he watched your face the entire time. His hand abandoned your mouth and you gasped, gulping in air as you came down from your high. The buzzing ceased and your body fell limp, your muscles relaxing.
Din helped you redress yourself, taking his time and tracing his fingers over your exposed skin before it vanished beneath your clothes. "So that's where you went today," He laughed gently, turning the massager over in his hand. "I knew you weren't talking to locals. You've never been a good liar."
You groaned and rolled onto your side, facing away from him. Embarrassment flooded your body, the realization of what had just happened setting in. Despite the fact that he entered the room, saw you as you pleasured yourself, and still felt the desire to help you get off, you couldn't help feeling vulnerable.
"Y/N."
His voice sounded... Different. It wasn't metallic, it didn't sound muffled or altered in any way. It was organic, and soft, and hung in the air like gentle music to your ears. The realization hit you like a brick.
His helmet was off.
As you tried to turn back around, he was quick to stop you, moving you back onto your side as he laid beside you in the bed. His breath hit your neck, whispering past your ear like a soft breeze. The sensation made you flinch, drawing in a sharp breath as his arm wrapped around your middle from behind. He pulled you close, the center of your shoulders pressing into his warm chest.
"I hope you know I did that by choice," He mumbled, his lips grazing your skin. "I didn't embarrass you, did I?"
"No, no, it's not that," You said quickly, "I just... didn't think you'd ever want to do something like that. I thought it was against your creed. It took me off guard, I guess."
"It is," Din sighed, "But if I'm breaking the rules for anyone, it should be you."
"Are you still mad at me?" You asked, a hint of playfulness in your voice.
The quiet laugh that left his lips was enough to make anyone crumble at his feet. "I was never mad at you. I could tell you were getting... Frustrated, to put it mildly. I didn't blame you for being attracted to someone else. It was him I was mad at."
"You barely knew him," You replied.
"I know," Din agreed, leaning in close enough to kiss your jaw. "But he was looking at my girl."
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ineffable-suffering · 1 year ago
Text
Why Aziraphale is an unreliable narrator
Part 2: The Story of wee Morag
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This is Part 2 of 3 total metas. Here are:
Part 1, in case you want to read about my analysis of the Story of Job first
and Part 3, in case you're impatient and want to jump ahead.
Fair warning though, for the sake of understanding some of the references, you're probably better off reading this chaptered meta chronologically. However, every part should work just as well as a standalone! I'll do my very best to make it so.
Alright, off or on you go beyond the cutty cut!
I'll start this second part off with a very brief summary of the main take aways and points from Part 1, which go as such:
Memory, as opposed to a third party's narration, is not a factual, objective retelling of a story or event. It's mingled and mangled with emotions, imaginations and exaggerations, projecting both the feelings and impressions you had back then as well as those you might have now in the present time back on whatever it is you are remembering. (Which is why we need to put everything that Aziraphale is remembering into the context of what he might have felt in the past, as well as what he's feeling right now.)
While this doesn't mean his (or anyone's) memories are lies, it does mean they're a very subjective and sometimes factually distorted representation of what actually happened, which, in our case, gives us a lot of subtext and a lot of not-there furniture to figure out and look at.
So, let's continue with S2E3 and the Story of wee Morag. We start our flashback with a scene of Aziraphale writing his diary entry on the 10th of November, 1827. Immediately, it's firmly established that this is once again not an outside-point-of-view narration, but rather what Aziraphale remembers and wrote down.
One thing that immediately stuck out to me here, is how helpful and kind Crowley is to Elspeth, pretty much from the very beginning when they meet her in the graveyard. Not only does he take on a Scottish accent so she won't perceive him as English (as she does with Aziraphale), but he also helps her drag the barrel that has the fresh body in it and, in the end, even pulls it all by himself while Elspeth simply follows behind them. Here's a rather poor-quality picture, for reference:
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Now, we know that despite not showing it very often, Crowley has always been very fond of the humans and never really put himself on a pedestal simply because he's an immortal being himself. He likes humans, just like Aziraphale does. But, just like this story will tell us, Crowley knows that on top of liking humans, you can't just put them into boxes of good and evil and expect them to always do what is supposedly the "right" or "divinely good" thing to do. (Which is what differentiates him from Aziraphale in the way he understands and treats them, as we're shown in this minisode).
Him immediately and unspokenly helping Elspeth with dragging the barrel therefore might also be a first sign of a tiny projection from present day Aziraphale, as opposed to what Crowley might have actually done (probably just walked beside her, like Aziraphale) because he has the knowledge that Crowley really was so very kind to her in the end, wasn't he? And that he's kind to humans in general. ("Not kind! Off my head on Laudanum!" Sure, babe.)
Most of this minisode, in my opinion, is actually there to establish how Aziraphale's view of morality and good vs. evil used to be quite flawed and elitist –– and how Crowley has always been there to gently nudge him towards questioning his black and white view of heavenly right and hellishly wrong. That's why I think there's not as many hints in this minisode about Aziraphale's memories not being an accurate portrayal of what happened, as there are in the Story of Job or the magic show in 1941. (And, fear not, the latter will definitely be the most hint-heavy one). Alas, there's still a few bits and bobs in the Story of wee Morag that stuck out to me, that make a brief yet good case of the whole unreliable narration thing.
First of all: The way Aziraphale describes all of it in his diary is so different from the way we see him actually remembering it. It's almost like he tried to write this entry (and possibly all of his diary) as a bit of a thrilling short story, with himself as the main character. Which makes sense, given the fact that he adores books and would certainly be keen on dabbling in the art of capital-w Writing himself. It's yet again hinting at the fact that sometimes people (and angels) try to polish and bedazzle stories (and memories) to make them seem more exciting and adventurous, often to distract from the not-so-fun parts of it.
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Like when Aziraphale's diary narrates:
"It was with heavy heart we arrived at Elspeth's destination. I was determined to thwart her monstrous plan!"
... and yet we see Crowley and Elspeth casually walking down the alleyway, very obviously not heavy-hearted in the slightest, while Aziraphale nervously scurries on behind them, very obviously not determined to thwart. (Timestamp-wise, it's around 17:38 in S2E3, in case you want to see for yourself.)
We get another cinematographic/auditory hint at the fact that Aziraphale's memory is heavily influenced by what he's feeling that very moment, when Dr. Mister Dalrymple –– FRCSE, thank you very much –– shows him the tumor he removed from the seven year old boy. You can see the shock and horror on Aziraphale's face once he learns of this child's cruel fate. We then proceed to hear Mr. Dalrymple's voice grow sort of echo-y and far away as the sad music swells up and drowns out his voice almost completely. It's awfully similar to what it feels like when really horrible news are broken to you and you dissociate and drift into a state of shock. Here's the clip of it, so you may listen for yourself:
It's clear that this is a very subjective portrayal of what Aziraphale is going through during this part of the memory. He's deeply horrified and saddened about the little boy having passed away so early in life – and we hear and feel this shock with him. Through him, because this is his memory. Whatever it is he's feeling and thinking, we're feeling and thinking it too because we're seeing it through his lense.
Another (less sad) hint at a possible exaggeration is the abnormally deep hole Crowley makes the two graveyard watch keepers fall into. I'm pretty sure he's very much in charge of his miracles, making this random slip-up seem a little silly – which is why I'm also pretty sure the "Might have slightly overdone it on that hole" is a wee bit of a meta hint at this just being another one of Aziraphale's dramatic bedazzlements of this story. For the *flings feather boa around neck* drama!
You know what else might be exaggerated? Hm, I dunno, maybe Crowley growing into the size of a tree for no apparent reason. Sure, yes, he's pretty high on Laudanum which is making him a bit loopy. But apart from that, it does seem an awfully big cinematographic euphemism for him being the metaphorical (and, once again, for the drama of it) literal bigger person in this scenario. He's the one who ends up saving Elspeth and who manages to secure a safe life without poverty and grave robbing for her. While Aziraphale was so tangled up in his own moral journey and main character-ism, missing that wee Morag was seconds away from death already, Crowley is the one who actually ends up growing stepping up for the human in need and saving them for good (pun intended).
In a way, it might just be Aziraphale's view of/feelings for Crowley in this very moment. Watching the demon outgrow what, according to Aziraphale's heavenly logic, is supposed to be a foul fiend, bestowing evil upon humanity – and growing into someone who does the exact opposite and saves Elspeth instead. Another larger-than-life character development, in Aziraphale's eyes. Literally.
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Let's switch back to the topic of the diary entry one last time, so I can make my final point of the this minisode's unreliable and a smidge over-dramatic narration of Dr. McFell. If you pay close attention, Aziraphale starts the entry we're all getting to experience with: "Last month, Crowley and I both happened to be in Edinburgh." Which means it didn't actually happen on the 10th of November, but rather at some point in October, 1827. Once we see Crowley get hydro-pumped back to Hell after rescuing Elspeth, the minisode ends with, presumably, the last sentence of Aziraphale's diary entry: "And that was the last I would see of Crowley for quite some time."
Take my hand and let's look at where the furniture isn't: This very clearly means that Crowley couldn't have been gone for more than a month, at best. Read again: "It happened last month and that was the last I would see of him for quite some time." This, albeit indirectly, clearly implies that when Aziraphale had sat down to write the diary entry, he had already run into Crowley again. Otherwise his phrasing would have probably been more along the lines of "... and I haven't seen Crowley since" or "... and Crowley has yet to return from wherever it is Hell's currently keeping him".
What's the point I'm trying to make? Good question. I guess my main point of storyteller Aziraphale being a bit over-dramatic in his narration is simply backed up by this, since A Single Month would barely pass as "quite some time" for an immortal being like him. And yet that's how he puts it, in his little Confidential Journals of A.Z. Fell, Vol. 603.
And another point that has absolutely nothing to do with the topic of this meta (but I'm still gonna make it 'cause this is my memory post): The meeting at St. Jame's Park in 1862 that so many, post-S2, took to be their first run-in after the Story of wee Morag, actually wasn't that at all. They saw each other at least once only a month later, as Aziraphale's diary lets us know. Which explains why he wasn't very surprised or concerned when he met Crowley in London, 1862. If there really had been 35 years in between those two events, the first one ending with Crowley being sucked back Downstairs to receive more than three decades worth of hellish punishment, wouldn't Aziraphale have been at least a tiny bit worried or more interested than:
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Just saying.
Alright, let's string this inflated hot air balloon of a post back together so we can outline some invisible furniture. This time with only two humble points:
Crowley through Aziraphale's lense Backed up by how we are introduced to Bildad the Shuhite in the Job minisode (suave, cheeky, smart, passionate in shoemaking and obstetrics), it's growing quite clear that Aziraphale's memories and impressions of Crowley are very fond and impressed ones. He sees him as someone who's not only witty, funny and cool, but also as someone who has figured out way sooner and faster than him that nothing's ever black and white. Not God's plans and not the human's choices either.
Aziraphale as a bit of an exaggerating adventure author With the direct parallel we get of inkslinger journalist!Aziraphale in the present day, it's quite apparent after this minisode that Aziraphale's memory is not only deeply influenced by his emotions, but that he also tends to have a bit of a dramatic touch to him. Although, you gotta give it to the guy: A month without seeing the love of your life, even if said life is eternal, can indeed seem like "quite some time".
Well, would you lookie here, we've reached the end of Part 2! What a journey it was. I hope you forgive me for the fact that I drifted off-course a few times. I just can't seem to reel in my silly little observations, even if they've got nothing to do with the point I'm trying to make. But hey, doesn't that just make me a little bit like Aziraphale's storytelling, in a way?
I'll let you be the judge of that.
See you in Part 3! And in case you haven't snuck a peak yet: here's Part 1 again.
Ta!
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hydrngea · 2 years ago
Note
Rafe x reader
They grew up together and as kids Rafe got reader a necklace and she still wears it to this day but Rafe doesn’t notice until she’s all dressed up for midsummer
(This is really random but I thought it was cute lol)
Ur writing is amazing btw! 🫶🏻
perfect pick
a/n : thanks sm!!! i appreciate the compliment :)) i didn’t completely answer the prompt but i might do a part 2 in a couple of days :))
notes : rafe cameron x reader, au to some extent featuring rafes mom before she disappeared.
masterlist | PART TWO
————
rafe could care less about your tenth birthday. in fact, the only reason he even knew it was coming up was because it was all you and sarah could ever talk about lately; what the theme would be, what kind of cake would be the best to eat, who should and should not be invited.
rafe cameron does not care about your birthday- which is why when his mom forced him to come along with her to pick out a present for you, all he wanted to do was jump out of the car and run away.
“but she’s not even my friend.” he whined as they entered the mall, keeping the door open for his mom to go in with wheezies stroller.
“no buts. she’s family, rafe.”
he groans, his steps heavy against the large and perfectly square porcelain tiles of tiffany’s.
“just because she’s your best friends daughter doesn’t mean i have to get her a present.”
his mom shushes him as they approach the jewelry counter, placing a hand on his shoulder before smiling at the associate.
the associate is too enthusiastic to be genuine at this time of day. rafe rolls his eyes at her sickly sweet tone while she asks what they’re looking for. he feels a nudge at his side and his face twitches with annoyance.
“a necklace.” he says under his breath, planning on choosing the first one the associate suggests.
she leads them to the left side of the store, hand gesturing to an array of really expensive necklaces for them to choose from.
“i’ll be right where you found me if you need any help with specifics.” she smiles before abandoning them.
rafe turns to look at his mom, who holds wheezie on her hip. “so?” he shrugs.
“hm?”
he shoves his hands into the pockets of his shorts, “what one do you want?”
his mother laughs, adjusting wheezie on her hip and grabbing her hand, stopping her from dirtying the display with her chubby fingers. “i don’t want any of these. which one does y/n want?”
the question makes him think for a second. he doesn’t know what you would like. he flips through his memories for some sort of indication, but really he should just point to a random piece and call it a day.
red. he thinks, he remembers you saying your favorite color is red- on multiple occasions.
it was red like ladybugs 4 years ago. then red like pretty roses. red like red pandas a couple years before. red like taylor swifts iconic lipstick now.
he shakes his head, then points to a silver chain with a little red charm in it. “that.” he shrugs and then turns on his heel, before his mom can question if its the best choice.
he fidgets with the black ribbon wrapped neatly on top of the gift box theyd put the necklace in, eyes tracing over the bolder lettering over and over again as they walked back to the parking lot. he avoids making eye contact with his mom, like for some reason it’d trigger her to go on another rant about how he should act gentlemanly when he gives her the present or at least act like he cares.
they make it to the car without any conversation, save for some half-coherent blabber here and there from wheezie. he slips into the passenger seat while his mom buckles in wheeze into her carseat, the box still in his hands.
halfway through the car ride, the silence between them is broken. “i know you don’t like to talk about your feelings rafe, but you don’t do a great job at hiding your facial expressions.”
“mom,” he groans, leaning the back of his head deep into the leather seat of her escalade.
“i can tell you have a soft spot for her.” she continues, pressing on the brakes as they approach a red light.
“i don’t.” rafe grumbles, fingernail digging into the box and leaving a mark.
“deny all you want, but i saw the way you looked thinking about her. it’ll catch up to you one day.”
he finally brings his gaze to her, his blue eyes meeting her mirroring irises with a glint of curiosity over what her words mean. he makes to open his mouth, to ask what she means by the look. to ask what’s going to catch up to him. but then reminds himself it doesn’t matter and stops himself.
he doesn’t have anything to catch up to him, because he doesn’t have any sort of feelings for y/n.
there’s no way he feels something towards you- could he?
he shakes his head, putting the box to his side and out of his lap and flickering his eyes to his window. why is he letting his mom get into his head?
he doesn’t care about you. doesn’t care about hee stupid birthday, or even care much about the stupid present he chose for you.
—————-
your tenth birthday party is excatly how you wanted it to be. it’s perfectly decorated, with red streamers hung all over the downstairs of your house and taylor swift themed snacks and games. you were having the time of your life, drunk off shirley temples in fancy alcholol flutes.
you notice a stain on your birthday sash and you pout. quickly excusing yourself to drop off the sash in your room, you rush out of your back patio and into the house, making your way towards the stairs when you bump into someone’s solid chest.
here’s one thing to note; regardless of what everyone says, you do not like rafe cameron. “oh, rafe.” you say, taking a small step back-you can feel your cheeks burn under his gaze.
okay fine, the previous statement was a lie. but not completely, it was only a small crush. tiny. as big as the sprinkles on your birthday cake.
“here.” he shoves a small gift bag into your hands and then hastily walks away before you can ask what it is.
the interaction leaves you somewhat disoriented but also flustered, skin pink and pulse fast.
on your past birthdays, you always get one present from sarah and one from her parents. and that’s what you think it is, a present from sarah’s family.
you bring the bag up with you into you room and pull the sash off your body, throwing it into a random corner of your room.
you know it’s bad etiquette to open presents before it’s time, but for some reason you’re too drawn to the gift bag to wait. you peak your head out your bedroom door and find that the coast is clear, and open the bag, pulling out a small teal box with a black ribbon wrapped around it. you shake it close to your ear, guessing it’s some sort of jewelry and grin to yourself when you realize you’re right
you open the box and find the most perfect necklace ever. it’s silver, with a small red heart attached to its chain with your initial engraved onto it.
you’ll have to thank mrs and mr cameron for the gift. it might be even better than the one sarah got you.
you hear your mom call for you from the bottom of the stairs and you quickly shove the box into the top drawer of your dresser, leaving the bag on top of your bed before hurrying back downstairs to rejoin the party.
——-
you’re confused when mrs cameron hands you another gift bag when it’s time to open presents.
“another one?” you ask with your brow furrowed, though you aren’t complaining.
“from me, ward and wheeze.” she hands it to you with a warm smile and a quick wink.
that’s when it clicks that the present wasn’t from who you thought it.
you slip away from the party and rush back up to your room, grabbing the original bag and digging inside for a card or an indication form who it could be from.
there’s a note stuck to the bottom of the bag, made of ripped loose leaf and written with a dull pencil.
“happy birthday” it says, with no signature. but you don’t need one to know who it’s from.
suddenly, your heart starts hammering and your face starts to swell with a smile.
you can’t believe it- rafes the one who got you the necklace, and somehow he managed to make it perfect.
—-
authors note part 2 : i want to say this is extremely UNEDITED so i apologize for any errors and incoherences etc ! there’s a 90% chance i’m gonna take this down and repost this with edits lol.
taglist : @mrsstarkey1 @maybankslover @of-many-fandomss @dearreader03 @penny4yourthoughts @willowpains
PART 2
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idiopath-fic-smile · 27 days ago
Note
If you are still taking Halloween fic requests:
Member of a monster-themed novelty band Grantaire x Actual Vampire Enjolras
oh HELL YEAHHHHHH
i'd apologize for the ensuing silliness but you can probably gather that is a hallmark of the fledgling "monster-themed novelty band x actual literal monster" genre. this is part one; i may write more tomorrow
“Grantaire,” Joly panted, “come quick, it’s a party emergency!”
Grantaire, who might as well have lived inside a glass case labeled BREAK IN CASE OF PARTY EMERGENCY, flipped himself right side up from where he’d been about to attempt a keg stand, and nodded solemnly, clapping his hands together. The blood rushed back to his head in a giddy wave.
“What do you need?” he asked.
Joly nodded at Bossuet to explain as the three of them barreled down the hallway.
“Here’s the thing,” said Bossuet, “we hired a band tonight, but the lead singer got way too high and now he thinks he needs to liberate all the notes from his guitar.”
Grantaire cocked his head to one side. “Does that explain why someone’s spent the past hour loudly and determinedly playing scales?”
“I don’t pretend to understand the inebriate’s mind!” Joly shouted, gesticulating wildly. The effect was slightly undercut by the bottle of gin in his hand.
“Point is,” said Bossuet, still walking at an almost-run, “we already rounded up Eponine and Bahorel. We need you guys to take the stage and salvage what’s left of tonight. C’mon, Bahorel says your sound is really getting there.”
“We’re not a band,” Grantaire insisted. “We’re a support group that keeps getting noise violations. We’ve never even played a gig.” He knew he probably sounded whiny but it had been a long week. His minimum possible math requirement was kicking his ass. “Besides, I had plans for tonight. I was gonna get laid.” Or at least, he was going to do his damnedest. Believe in yourself. Manifest your dreams. No I in team.
Bossuet simultaneously peered at Grantaire and pulled him through a door. “Is that why you’re dressed as…god, I don’t know, what do you call all this?”
“I thought he was an Animorph,” announced Joly. “Like, at a midpoint in the transformation to some kind of hairy animal.”
Grantaire coughed.
“Sorry,” said Joly easily. “A Sexy Mid-Transformation Animorph.”
“Shit, take in some culture once in a while, this is embarrassing,” said Grantaire. He gestured at the wolf ears on his headband, the fur glued to the cuffs of his shirtsleeves, the canine nose he’d drawn over his own with Eponine’s eyeliner pencil, the strategically ripped shirt and jeans. “I’m a Sexy Wolfman,” he said. “Obviously.”
He and Eponine, who had watched Ginger Snaps every day for the past month, had agreed to go as a pair of werewolves, but then Eponine had abandoned their pack of two to go make out with Cosette, which he really should’ve seen coming. He couldn’t even hold it against her; Eponine had been “casually” memorizing Cosette’s general weekly schedule for the past couple of semesters, when she wasn’t watching Cosette moony-eyed from the other side of the Quad. It was all probably very cute.
“Well, Wolfman,” said Bossuet, nudging Grantaire in the direction of the makeshift stage, where Bahorel was taking a seat behind the drums and Eponine was—reluctantly, by the look of it—re-tuning her borrowed bass. “You three have about thirty seconds to think of a band name.”
Grantaire picked up the electric guitar and raised his eyebrows at Eponine, whose lupine makeup was now marred by bright red lip marks, like something from a cartoon. Her own lips were smeared crimson, which was to be expected, but.
“She stopped to kiss you multiple times on the cheek?” he muttered.
“Shut up,” said Eponine, visibly blushing. “How’s your quest for a meaningless hookup?”
Grantaire let out a long breath. “Not even the furries are biting,” he admitted as Eponine snickered.
“Band names, people,” said Bahorel. He adjusted a cymbal. “I don’t have all night.”
“Hello,” Grantaire intoned into the microphone. “We are Not Even the Furries Are Biting! This first song—”
“Gonna kill you and make it look like an accident,” Eponine crooned low in his ear. “The embarrassing kind. Toilet-related.”
The thing was, in their capacity as a very loud sort-of group therapy session, with October 31st on the horizon, they had actually been talking about the appeal of wolves as a metaphor for the parts of oneself that felt wild or lonely or unlovable. To that effect, they’d been toying with a couple songs.
Maybe, thought Grantaire, this would not be a complete and total clusterfuck.
They played “I was a Teenage Werewolf” by The Cramps. They played “I’m The Wolf Man” by Round Robin. They played “Werewolf” by The Frantics. Any time he, Bahorel, or Eponine ran into a snag—a fumbled note, a missed beat, a patch that wasn’t perfectly memorized—Grantaire attempted to cover for them by throwing back his head and wailing, as if he was losing more and more of his grip on his humanity.
They were just finishing the first verse of The Black Keys’ “Howling for You” when Grantaire saw him: a tall, handsome stranger lingering at the back edge of the room, with intense eyes and an even more intense air of stone-cold sobriety. He wasn’t smiling, wasn’t frowning, just—looking. Disapprovingly? Apathetically? Saddled with a bad case of heartburn? It was hard to tell.
The chorus started up, and Grantaire sang along with Eponine and Bahorel:
“Da da da da da, da da da da da da—”
Grantaire grinned as more and more of the crowd joined in—pulled along less by the band’s general prowess or charisma and more by a drunk college student’s inherent love of an easy earworm, but Grantaire wasn’t splitting hairs at this point.
“Da da da da da, da da da da da—”
A sea of bobbing, singing partygoers, and there on the fringes, Offensively Sober Guy stood perfectly still, watching Grantaire so intently that Grantaire almost forgot the words to the refrain.
Or rather, the word.
Or rather, the single repeating syllable.
To Offensively Sober’s left, two guys attempted to clink their beer bottles together and somehow lost their balance, careening into him. He maintained his impeccable posture as if they weren’t even in the room, never breaking his stare. It was honestly a little creepy.
For reasons Grantaire would later not be able to fully reconstruct, he decided the funniest thing to do would be to wink and smirk and generally pretend like Sober was really, really into him.
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