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court-jester-stuff · 6 months ago

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Sharing a room with a not so stranger

Azriel x reader

Warnings?: reader is shorter than Azriel, not beta we die like suriel, kinda rushed? idk it's 23:54 so meh enjoy

Note: the library is based of off the acropolis and what I image Olympus would look like, so is all the rest of the Day Court. pictures from pinterest

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"So sorry to bother you," a voice said from behind you. "Can I ask you for a favour?" Turning around you came face to face with Elain. She was dressed beautifully, a light pink coloured dress with a corset with flowers embroidered onto it, sleeves of the shoulders with on the shoulders and wrist embroidered the same flowers as the corset. Her hair was loose with a few braids which all had flowers in it. Truly you’d be lying if you said she didn’t look pretty.

“That depends on what the favour is of course.” You answered her with a smile. In all honesty you hoped it would be something entertaining, these past couple of days have been fun here at the Day Court but you were slowly growing bored. This whole event was to celebrate summer solstice, the Night Court was specifically invited by High Lord Helion as a means to grow a stronger alliance. A full two weeks of celebrating and getting to know each other.

Elain looked behind her and when you followed her gaze you could see Lucien standing in the doorway smiling at her and giving her an encouraging nod.

“Would you, by any chance, …” she trailed of looking at me with an air of hesitance. Giving her a little push you asked:

“Would I…?”

Elain sighed a little but finished her sentence. “Would you mind if Azriel and I switched rooms?” She paused to let the words sink in. “I would really like to try giving this a chance and we already asked Azriel and he’s fine with it, but only if you are. And I know you two aren’t all that familiar with each other but I would really appreciate this.”

At last she stopped talking to gage your reaction only to see a little smile on your face. “My dear, I would not mind at all. You two deserve this moment to try and see where this all leads you.” She perked up at your words and you could see Lucien visibly relax in the corner of your eye. “If Azriel is comfortable with this all then I do not mind.”

She thanked you and said that they would be sure to inform Azriel of you agreeing before they both took their leave.

Once they did take their leave you started thinking about what you just agreed to. In all honesty you and Azriel hadn’t really spoken in quite a while. As members of the Inner Circle it was kind of inevitable but that still didn’t change the conversations you had had with him.

He never seemed to speak much, especially not to you. Only during the rare times that he would ask for help with an injury would you two really talk. And even then it was mostly you talking to him about how to take care of the wound even though he has probably done so a million times.

You’d always find him looking at you with deep eyes whenever you’d look up from your work. He never really seemed to take his eyes off of you while you were working. Whether he was guarded or something else you couldn’t quite decide.

Outside of that there were a few conversations you had had with the spymaster. But lately that had started to change. You were in the habit of sneaking away during each social event to lend yourself a moment of fresh air before stepping back into the crowded rooms. However these last couple of, hell, years you always seemed to get the company of a certain shadowsinger wherever you had decided to sneak of to.

Not that you mind, in all honesty you couldn’t deny the pull you felt towards him. Each conversation, each interaction left you yearning for more. You wanted to hear him speak to you, you wanted to know who he was outside of this persona he had been given.

Deciding that you should try to make things easier for the both of you lead to you walking back to the room you previously shared with Elain with the goal in mind of tidying up a bit. Once there you put away any clothing that was lying around, noting that all of Elain her stuff had already been moved.

The room wasn’t big by any means, in fact you and Elain had specifically requested a smaller sized room. There was a wall with a huge window opposite of the door with the bed against the left wall and a couch on the opposite side next to the window.

Once you deemed the room clean enough you realized that the room might be cozy for you and Elain but Azriel would have trouble getting comfortable in the bed were there someone else in it. Deciding that there wouldn’t be enough space on the bed for both you while allowing his wings to rest comfortably and without the fear of accidental touching, you made the decision to move a pillow and blanket to the couch. Moving that what was on the night stand to the little table next to the couch.

A knock on the door made you pause. Assuming that it was either Elain or Azriel you went to open the door, only to be surprised by a smiling Helion.

“High Lord.” You said with a small bow of the head. You’ve always liked the man, he was polite and kind. A bit of a flirt maybe but still aware of boundaries. And he ruled his court exceptionally well. All people were well taken care of and very rarely did they find themselves in conflict with other courts. Compared to the Night Court which carried the looming darkness of The Court of Nightmares and Hewn City that was very admirable.

“Oh you, there is no need for such titles. Call me Helion, please.” He chuckled a bit at the formality of it all but still kept a smile on his face as he corrected you.

“Well then Helion, is there anything I can help you with?”

His smile widened a little at your question. His eyes sparkling a little. “I heard that you take care of a large portion of all the knowledge that is stored in the Night Courts library, I must say it is quite the collection. One to be proud of.”

Mirroring his smile you replied with a hint of proudness to your voice. “Yes, indeed. I travel a lot and when I do I can’t help but try to take at least one book with me to further the collection you speak so highly of.”

“Well, the Day Court does have quite the library as well and I thought that I could interest you in taking a look around.” He gestured with his hand down the left corridor.

Your gaze followed the direction from his hand before looking back inside the room. Everything seemed in order for when Azriel would arrive. “Is it just down the hallway?” You ask.

He shakes his head with the same smile on his face that has been there since you opened the door. “Why don’t I show you there, it’s a bit of a maze in here.”

You nodded and walked out into the hallway, closing the door behind you before making your way to the library. The empty hallways were filled with easy going small talk between the two of you before you eventually reached the library.

To say that it was beautiful would be an understatement. It was truly breathtaking. It looked like a place where gods would walk, the high ceilings and windows with no glass allowed as much natural light in as possible. The walls were a cream colour with beautiful paintings on the ceilings.

You should remember to tell Feyre so she could come get a look.

The bookcases were white with golden accents, they crowded the entire room except for the space right before the window. Leaving enough space for several couches and a table surrounded by chairs. Even the wood of the furniture was a light colour.

You don’t know how long you simply admired the space but when you turned around Helion was looking at you with a proud smile and a look of admiration on his face.

He clears his throat and says: “It’s beautiful is it not?” You weren’t really sure what to say. It was beautiful but outside of the beauty of it you were also surprised by its sheer size. Maybe it was the lighting but it looked so much more spacious than the library at the House Of Wind.

“It is very beautiful, I honestly don’t really know what to say. The lighting and colours are so much brighter than those of the ones we have. Even the books match the pale colours. And the amount of books here is admirable. This truly is a fine library.”

“Well, I am more than happy to have shown it to you. Please, feel free to look around and spent as much time here as you please. I’m afraid I cannot stay with you for much longer, duty calls, but rest assured that you are more then welcome in this library. Or even my court.”

You smiled slightly at his words and told him you would keep it in mind. It wasn’t for long before he excused himself and left you to your own company.

You roamed around looking for any books that peaked your interest and finally settled on a handful of them. You found another window with seating space, albeit this on smaller, and settled down on the plush couch facing slightly away from the window.

You don’t know how much time you spend sitting there but when you finally looked up from the third book that you were reading you realized that the sun had set and the sky was now adorned with stars. Granted, there weren’t as many or as bright of ones as in Valaris but it was a sight none the less.

Deciding to call it a night you got up and realised just how long you had been sitting in that same position you stretched and gathered the books you had laying around you. Walking up to the desk you left the books there for someone to find in the morning.

The hallways were quiet now, beside your own steps and breathing there as nothing to be heard.

Ones you had made your way back to your room you were very careful while opening the door as to not startle or wake up Azriel.

When the door was open far enough to slip inside you did so carefully, the room was bathed in moonlight and given the light you could see Azriel’s sleeping figure on the bed. He had moved himself fairly far to the window leaving enough space for a second person to lay down next to him if needed.

But you didn’t need to and getting in the bed would mean having to move his left wing out of the way and you weren’t about to touch the one place that Illyrians loathed to be touched.

Quietly making you way to the bathroom you quickly changed into night clothing and treaded very lightly to the couch. You laid down and when you finally settled you felt something twirling itself around your fingers. Looking down you realised it was a shadow. You smiled at it, mouthing good night before it parted from you to return to their master and with that you went off into slumber.

When you woke up again there was not yet any sunlight in the room. You looked over at the clock on the wall above the door and noted that it was almost time for sunrise. You looked over at Azriel realising he was still fast asleep and decided to take one of the books of your little makeshift nightstand before shuffling to the open balcony.

It must be a dream for winged people to be able to simply fly up to their rooms from the outside without having to first enter and walk both the hallways and stairs.

You sat down on a sofa that was located opposite to where the bed stood so you could keep an eye on Azriel in case he were to awake.

Before long the sunrise started, it was truly magnificent. The colours weren’t simply red, pink and yellow. No, you were sure you could make out nearly the entire rainbow from the sky.

You once again felt a little coolness around your fingers which finally prompted you to look away from the scenery.

“Hello you, we meet again.” You smiled softly at it while speaking in a whisper, mindful of the early time. “What are doing over here, hm? Shouldn’t you be guarding your master?”

It moved around your fingers and palm before deciding to return to the figure on the bed. Looking over you realised you had been caught making small talk with a shadow.

From the bed a tired looking Azriel looked at you with eyes of wonder. “Good morning.” You greeted. “You should go back to sleep, it’s still very early.” Which granted it was. Looking at the clock once more you saw that it read six.

He hummed as if in thought before turning his head into the pillows and stretching. His legs coming out from beneath the blanket and his wings stretching wide. They nearly hit the wall on his right from how wide they were.

He relaxed again before letting himself fall back into the mattress. For a bit you thought he had taken your advice but alas he started turning so he could sit up in bed.

His hair was frizzled and stood a little upright. He had dark circles under his eyes and a sleepy look covering his face. He blinked a few times before moving to sit with his legs over the side of the bed. The blanked had fallen and you couldn’t help but look at his chest, the muscles well defined, quite a few scars, some bigger than the others and a tattoo covering the entirety of his upper chest. It looked just like the shadows that had started swirling around him again.

Curling through his hair and around his ear, likely whispering little things they noticed or deemed important enough.

Deciding the stop gaping at the male you moved your eyes back to the other side, the sunset nearly over by now. Even though only a matter of two to three minutes could have one by the sun had risen fast. Likely a Day Court thing. It shone brightly and you could feel it’s light gently ceres your skin.

Feeling a presence nearby you noticed that Azriel had started moving towards you, yawing in the process before settling down next to you in the sofa.

You sat in comfortable silence for a bit before he spoke. “The sunrise is likely the only thing I enjoy about this court.” You smiled gently at his words before looking over at him.

He was looking at the sunrise with a small smile on his face before he turned his attention to you. His eyes seemed to soften a little bit more when they met yours.

“How did you sleep? I heard you come in quite late and you were up early.” He noted with a small furrow of his brow. Although the gentle smile stayed on his face.

“I slept pretty decent actually. I had lost myself in a book in the library so I was back rather late, I am sorry if I woke you.” You replied back, spoken in soft voices.

He assured you that you had not awoken him, rather he himself were still awake.

“I noticed one of my shadows with you this morning, they don't usually do that. Have they done that before? Because I’ll tell them off if they make you uncomfortable, although I must say that it did not seem that way just now.”

You beamed slightly at his words. “I don’t mind at all, in fact they are rather nice.” You smiled a little brighter as some of them immediately darted towards you, some playing with your fingers other roaming around, a few even went into your hair.

Azriel looked slightly startled as they did this. “I think last night while I went to lay down was the first time. Whichever one it seemed to have wanted to come say goodnight to me.” You thought for a bit, admiring them before realisation hit you. “Wait, actually, I think they might have done that before. Back during Solstice a few of them curled around my arm when I passed you. I completely forgot about that.”

You looked over at him and he seemed to be deep in thought, his brow was really furrowed now and his smile was no longer. When he didn’t seem to snap out of it you placed your hand on his wrist.

He blinked in surprise before looking at you hand on him which had him frowning once more.

You removed your hand before clearing you throat. “Sorry, I would have taken your hand but you seem to always shy away when people do that. I shouldn’t have assumed that your wrist would be any different.”

He looked up at you expression unchanging. He opened his mouth to say something right as a knock sounded from the door. You looked over at it before deciding to go over and see who it was. You looked back over at him to see him still staring. You gave him a little smile, after apologizing again you stood up and made your way to the door.

You opened it just after another knock sounded and were surprised to see your own High Lord.

He looked slightly surprised by you before giving a smile. “Well good morning, it seems our dear Azriel is in good hands then.” He chuckled softly, mindful of those still sleeping.

Just as you were about to ask him what was wrong or what he had meant you felt a hand on your waist. While the other grasped the door besides your head.

“Can we help you Rhys?” Azriel sounded kind of agitated, a clear difference from simple moments ago. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was because Rhysand was here or because you touched his wrist.

“Not necessarily, I simply wanted to check in on you both. I had heard from Feyre that Elain and our dear Azzy here had switched rooms.” He said the last part while grinning at you.

Before either of you could say anything else Azriel decided that the High Lord and his brother had overstayed his welcome. “If you aren’t here for a decent reason could you let us be?”

He surprised you with that but the high fea before you seemed unbothered, maybe even pleased.

“Of course, of course. I wouldn’t want to bother you two. Remember that meeting we have at nine.” He barely finished speaking when Azriel pulled you back into him begore closing the door.

You both stood there for a moment until you decided to turn around. Only then did you notice how close he really was and how very bare his chest still was.

After a second of standing in a daze staring at his chest and tattoo you seemed to come back to reality when you moved backwards a step, which in turn caused your back to hit the door. You looked up and Azriel followed your step until his arm was pressed into the door above your head.

He leaned in slightly while you tilted your head upwards to try and look at him properly. If you didn’t know better you’d say he was blushing.

“I don’t mind you touching my wrist. Or my hand.” He paused while looking at you. He leaned in even more, noses nearly touching. “I never mind when it’s you.”

You both held eye contact between each other until his gaze flicked over your face as if searching for something. Eventually he pulled away and you smiled at him, hoping he couldn’t hear the loud drumming of your heart.

Later you found yourself once again in the library. Azriel left at eight, presumably for the meeting Rhysand was talking about. And given that you were once again alone in your room and that you could read the books you had with you you could read another time you decided to return to the library.

A good portion of the day had passed, before you knew it the empty plate upon which the dinner that one of the helpers had given you had been cleared and replaced with coffee.

You finished yet another book and decided to try and find a book you had been looking for for a while. While strolling through the aisles you couldn’t help but have the feeling that you were being watched.

You wondered if it was something alike the House or Byraxsis. Although you doubted that something as ‘terrifying’ could be found in the Day Court.

Not to lie you had always enjoyed the presence of Byraxsis, you would read to it after a long day. And sometimes, just sometimes they would ask a question or ask for a book you could read.

You missed them sometimes, although the same cannot be said about Cassian.

When you reached for a book you noticed that you were once again joined by a little shadow. You smiled at it before returning to looking for your book.

When you were about to enter another aisle the little shadow decided to pull you a different way. You ended up three aisles down from where you were going. The little shadow kept going before stopping before a specific bookcase. You looked around it for a bit, curious at what the littlz thing would want to show you and that’s when you saw just the book you were looking for.

When you went to thank the little one, you realized that it was nowhere to be found.

Shrugging it off you decided to focus on the matter at hand. To get the book that was placed about a meter and a half above you. You tried to reach it by standing on your tiptoes before someone reached out above you to take it of the shelve.

You immediately recognized the scars on the hands, the siphons and the little shadows that had once again decided to dance along your skin.

Lowering your hand you turned around to see Azriel leaning over you in the same way he had been that morning. Except this time he was smiling softly, it tugged on a heart string to see him smile like that. Gods what you wouldn’t do to see him smile like that more.

“A bit short aren’t you.” It wasn’t a question as much as it was a tease. You huffed but smiled and thanked him for the book. But just as you went to reach for it he held it out of your reach. The smile on his face widened at your playful glare. You reached for it again but this time he held it above his head. So you decided to step closer until you were practically chest to chest and place one hand on his chest and raise one to reach for the book.

He seemed surprised by your boldness and movement that his arm went slack and you managed to lower it and grab the book.

You smiled at the look on his face and patted his chest. You took a step back.

“I’m surprised to see you here. Wasn’t expecting it.” You said softly to respect the space.

He shrugged and smiled. “Maybe I wanted to read and saw a damsel in distress.” You laughed a little, denying being a damsel or in distress. He leaned in closer with is head and upper body and added. “Or maybe I just wanted to see you.”

You flushed at that and he laughed quietly, deciding that you were red enough he gestured for you to follow while he offered his arm. Which you took.

He led you to where you had sat yesterday and took a book of his own. He sat down besides you on the couch and started reading.

You finished your book rather fast and decided to read another and another. As did he, only he didn’t read nearly half of what you read.

Once it started getting late, and both of you began to get hungry he announced that you should be retire to the bedroom. You obliged, still you toom the books with you to the front desk so they could be placed where they needed to be. He smiled at you once that happened and once again offered his arm.

Back in the room, you both decided to wear something more comfortable. Azriel had once again ditched his shirt and opted for loose black sweatpants instead of his leathers.

The food was delivered to the door and you both ate in silence until he spoke up.

“Why did you sleep on the couch tonight?" You raised your head from your food and blinked at him. “I mean there was enough space for us both and as much as it is pretty that couch does not look comfortable.”

You smiled perhaps a bit sheepish and said: “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, you had already moved so for to the right and still there was little space. I definitely would have touched you, which I thought you were uncomfortable with. And I would have had to move your wing and even now that is a boundary I will not cross. Especially not in your sleep.”

He smiled softly at you and his eyes softened. “I wouldn’t mind you sleeping in the bed with me. Not at all.”

And so that’s how you ended up next to the shadowsinger. It was well past midnight and it appears that Azriel had found sleep, the same could not be said for you.

The blanket had little weight and was very thin. But getting out of the bed would mean waking Azriel zo you bared with it.

After a count you turned your head to Azriel to find him already looking at you. Startled at first your eyes widened before turning into a smile to match his own. You turned on your side to look at him better and did he look good.

His sleepy smile paired with that dammed look in his eyes.

“Why do you look at me like that?” you asked.

A beat passed, then he sighed and said: “Because you are simply stunning.”

A blush crept up your face. “So are you, dammed handsome truly.”

You thought that he would laugh or say something back but instead his face faltered. It hurt to watch that, you frowned and wondered why that happened. Did he not believe you? Does he think you’re lying?

No, that’s not possible, I mean look at him. But his smile went completely and you felt such dread seeing it ago, and that’s when it happened.

Snap

…

“You…. You’re..” You weren’t sure what to say. It’s like your entire world got flipped upside down.

“Wait, you can feel it?” He said, leaning on his elbow. Your mouth opened and closed before you nodded with disbelief. He knew?

His smile started returning before he started reaching for me. Although he stopped abruptly, he looked at his hands and before I knew is I had taken them in mine and placed a kiss on the knuckles, the back of them and both palms.

His eyes glossed and his voice sounded so little as he asked: “You don’t mind? You don’t mind that it is me that is your….” His voice trailed off at the end.

“I do not, truly I am utterly delighted.” You took the side of his face in your hand while guiding him to lay back down. “I am more than happy to be your mate, Azriel.”

His eyes scanned mine for a lie, a single hesitation and when he found none he said upright and brought both wings to the correct sides. He gestured for me to sit up so I did. He laid back down with now the wing beneath me.

I hesitated and he told me once again: “I don’t mind when it’s you.”

So begrudgingly you laid down on his arm atop his wing while the other draped over you, along with his arm and shadows. The added weight was welcome and so was the warmth against the chilly air.

“How long have you known?” You ask.

“Remember Solstice two years ago, when we were having one of our conversations again?” You nodded. “And how all of a sudden I had to make the worst excuse ever to leave?” You nodded again.

“Well, you had said that my shadows were adorable and you called them ‘little ones’ ande then it just… snapped. I panicked cuz I did not know what to do, I almost spilled it all right then and there but I felt like you deserved better… or at least for it to be natural. Honestly even before the bond I really liked you, you should ask Rhys and Cass. They have some stories of me trying to impress you and it going terrifically wrong.”

You laughed and stared in wonder, you mate is a dork. And you love him. So you told him just that.

“I would love to het to know you better, truly. But know that even before and now still, I love you. My mate is such a dork and I’d love to hear all the stories.”

His arms wrapped around you tighter and the shadows seemed to do the same. And so you both laid there in each other’s arms.

#azriel x reader #azriel imagine #azriel fanfic #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x you #azriel #acotar x reader #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #my writing #i did this around midnight don't judge me #good night now

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rosyblooom · 7 months ago

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right person, wrong times | cl16

pairing: charles leclerc x fem!reader summary: a random day each year across 11 years, as they go from practically strangers, to more, to less, and again. (~4.3k) a/n: inspo from 'one day' !! been struggling with writer's block, so sorry in advance if it's rough lool

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

One day in 2018

Y/N glanced across the crowded room, picking out one familiar face amidst the sea of strangers: Pascale. Their families went way back, but with Y/N's parents splitting when she was just a toddler, she'd spent most of her life in Spain with her dad, Switzerland for boarding school, and rare trips to Monaco to visit her mum—hardly ever crossing paths with the Leclerc's.

But today was different. She found herself in Monaco attending a family gathering to finally meet Pascale's sons properly. She couldn't recall the last time she'd spoken to them, but Pascale had insisted today would be the day, especially since her recent move here.

Across the room, Charles stood, his posture slightly hunched as his mother whispered in his ear, urging him to check on Y/N. "Please go see how Y/N is doing. I'm not sure if she'll remember you, but just introduce yourself and keep her company for a while," Pascale pleaded, fixing him with a hopeful gaze. "Please."

"I don’t even know where she is or what she looks like."

"She's at the bar," Pascale replied with a smile. "She's the pretty one—you won't miss her."

"Very helpful," Charles chuckled, shaking his head before stepping back. "I'll make my way over now."

It didn't take long until he found himself at the bar. Surprisingly, his mother's brief description proved accurate, as Y/N stood out for her beauty—quite a departure from the faint memory he held of her.

Drawing closer, he flashed a warm smile and extended his hand in greeting. "Charles."

Y/N shot him a quick, assessing glance, her eyes flitting over his unruly hair and black attire, before meeting his gaze. "Not interested," she dismissed, her attention already wandering back to the room.

Chuckling at her abruptness, Charles shook his head. "No, no, I wasn't trying to... I'm not here to make a move, I wouldn't."

Y/N turned towards him, her curiosity piqued by his response. "Ouch," she teased, a hint of amusement dancing in her eyes. "So you think I'm ugly, then?" Her lips curved slightly as she awaited his answer.

Heat crept up Charles’ neck, and though he couldn’t see himself, he could sense the warmth spreading across his face. With a nervous stammer, he began, “Wait, no! That’s not what I meant—What I’m trying to say is—”

“Relax,” Y/N interjected with a sympathetic smile. “I’m just kidding. Nice to see you again, Leclerc. It’s been a while, huh?”

Charles let out a long breath, his tension easing slightly. For a moment, he studied Y/N with a discerning gaze, as if attempting to unravel her mystery; she was undeniably peculiar, yet undeniably intriguing. “It has been a while,” he finally acknowledged, nodding slowly.

One day in 2019

This marked Y/N’s first ever Christmas market in Monaco. She had wanted to attend last year’s, but the winter season had always been her least favourite. This time last year, it was simply too cold for her—no matter what the news claimed, she was freezing. But today wasn’t half as bad. Sure, she was bundled up in about three sweaters under her hoodie, which she wore beneath her jacket, but well, you could say she was sensitive to weather.

“Y/N?” a voice suddenly erupted from behind her, pulling her attention away from the gigantic, decorated Christmas tree and towards Charles, who now stood before her, holding two steaming mugs.

Y/N narrowed her gaze, appearing lost in thought. “Sorry, do I know you?”

Charles shook his head and sighed, his breath forming a white cloud in the chilly air. “Right, of course. It’s been a year, so it makes sense for you not to remember me…”

“I'm just joking,” Y/N grinned, nudging him cautiously to avoid any spills. “You’re too easy.”

Charles’ mouth dropped open slightly, his eyes widening for a moment before he chuckled, “Okay, I’m not going to believe anything you say from now on.”

"Good idea," she nodded with a smile. Y/N's gaze then drifted down to the two mugs in his hands, and she inquired, "Am I right to assume that one of these is for me?"

A puzzled expression briefly crossed Charles' face, his brows furrowing slightly, prompting Y/N to gesture towards the cups.

As if suddenly remembering, he exclaimed, "Oh, right! I thought you might want something warm, and who doesn't like hot chocolate, right?" With that, he offered one of the drinks to her.

"I sure do." Y/N took the cup, cupping her cold hands around the hot glass, immediately feeling the stiffness melt away from her fingers. The hot chocolate wasn't nearly as scalding as she had anticipated—it was just right, and she savoured each sip, briefly closing her eyes in contentment. When she reopened them, she couldn't help but remark, "Sweet, just like you."

As if someone had turned on a gas stove, heat rushed to Charles' face, though this time he was fortunate; the weather was already giving him a rosy complexion due to the cold.

But Y/N still noticed, and she smiled. "Don't go getting soft on me now," she teased, bumping her elbow into his arm.

Without really thinking, Charles muttered, "You're not making it easy…" His words slipped out, and with their proximity, Y/N heard him loud and clear. Even though it wasn't the first time she'd heard a comment like that, the fact that it came from Charles sent a pleasant shiver down her spine.

"What was that?" Arching a brow, Y/N glanced up at him sideways, a playful glint in her eyes.

"Nothing… Do you want to get inside though? It’s a little too cold for me."

“It’s my first time here,” Y/N said, hooking her arm around his, ignoring the sudden tension in his muscles. “Don’t want to get lost,” she explained, glancing up at Charles, who didn’t object and instead simply nodded. “Right, yeah.”

“So? Lead the way then.”

“Alright, alright,” Charles obliged, skilfully manoeuvring through the crowd, with Y/N beside him.

One day in 2020

“Is this seat taken?” The question caused Y/N to freeze, her forkful of ratatouille dropping onto her plate. She swallowed the remaining food in her mouth and swiftly swept the napkin off her lap, dabbing the corners of her mouth until she was sure there were no traces left.

“Not at all,” she finally responded, turning towards the voice. “I should warn you though—” But the moment her eyes met the familiar pair of Charles’ blue ones, she stopped mid-sentence.

For a brief moment, it seemed as if the rest of the table didn’t exist, as neither of them spoke, both too captivated by the other's presence. With a crooked smile, Charles broke the silence. “You were going to warn me about something?”

Y/N couldn't quite explain why, but the sight of his smile immediately lifted the corners of her mouth, while her stomach somersaulted with a flurry of emotions. She pushed aside the sensation and simply laughed, resting her elbows on the table and burying her face in her hands. “Just forget it,” she mumbled against her palms, loud enough for Charles to hear.

A gentle breeze wafted over her, carrying a familiar, clean scent of laundry detergent that Y/N had come to associate with Charles. Somehow, it immediately calmed the strange fluttering in her stomach, prompting her to lift her gaze again.

“Hi,” she finally greeted with a smile, reaching for the glass of wine on the table.

“Hey,” Charles nodded, settling back in his seat.

They lingered like this for a while, Y/N's gaze fixed on the side of his face while Charles casually surveyed the room, exchanging greetings with a few acquaintances. Squinting slightly, Y/N blurted out, “Are you stalking me?”

Charles burst into laughter, quickly composing himself and leaning towards her. “In my family's house?” he countered.

Y/N nodded in satisfaction as she took a sip from her drink. “Excellent point,” she conceded.

Gently settling the glass down, she redirected her attention to the untouched forkful of food and remarked, “Can I just say, you have to try this, it's so good.” She gestured towards her barely touched plate. “I don’t know what Pascale put in this, but this is the best ratatouille I’ve ever tasted.” Y/N grabbed her fork and extended it towards him, but noticing Charles freeze, she quickly swallowed her words, saying, “Oh, sorry, I know some people are a little iffy with sharing—”

Before she could retract the fork, Charles' warm hands suddenly enclosed around hers, halting her movement as he guided the fork towards his mouth, taking a bite, and nodding at her with a smile. “It’s been my favourite since I was a little kid.”

Y/N whispered softly, her voice barely above a murmur, yet close enough for them to hear each other perfectly. "A man of taste huh?" Her gaze drifted from his eyes down to where his hand still lingered around hers, now tracing soft circles across her skin.

Charles followed Y/N’s line of sight, quickly clearing his throat when he realised what he was doing. He withdrew his hand, causing both to avert their eyes, suddenly finding interest in everything but each other.

The last thing Charles wanted was to make Y/N uncomfortable, and as for her, she simply didn’t want to blow things out of proportion—see something where there was nothing. For all she knew, Charles was like that with all his friends.

A few moments passed, filled with surrounding chatter, before they both spoke up at the same time.

“Do you want to go—"

“So, do you have any other—"

Laughter erupted between them before Y/N smirked, “Because I’m a lady, you first.”

“How kind of you,” he chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “Are you free next week? We could maybe grab lunch or something.” Before she could respond, he added, scratching his neck, “I would offer to cook, but unfortunately, cooking skills don’t get genetically passed down.”

Ignoring the beat Y/N was sure her heart had just skipped, she simply smiled and leaned forward, chin propped on her hand. “You mean a date?”

“Only if that’s what you want.”

Her rapid nods confirmed everything before her words even formed. However, just as Charles’ lips broke into a broad grin, Y/N’s expression suddenly fell as she remembered, “Wait, no, I can’t. I’m travelling to Spain tomorrow to visit my dad. And then after that, I’ll start my internship in New York City.”

Charles sank back into his chair, though his face didn’t betray the disappointment he felt. “I see,” he sighed.

“Rain check?” Y/N asked. She wanted a date with him, to see if they’d hit it off on that level. The only problem was the timing, but she knew her feelings didn’t fade quickly. If they had to wait, then so be it. She was ready to do so. Laughing, Y/N added, “Seriously, I still want that date.”

“Rain check it is,” Charles nodded. “Congrats on the internship though, that’s amazing. Maybe I can come visit, and we’ll—”

The sudden clanking of glass interrupted him, causing both to turn their attention to the woman standing at the end of the long table.

Without breaking eye contact with the woman, Y/N leaned in closer to Charles, her lips accidentally grazing his as his gaze fleetingly dropped to her lips before he refocused on the woman, who had now dropped her glass onto the table.

Y/N whispered into his ear, to which Charles simply nodded, suppressing the sudden surge of desire coursing through his veins.

One day in 2021

Y/N walked through the Paddock with a sense of detachment, like a deer caught in headlights. The US Grand Prix had come to an end, and Max Verstappen had emerged as the victor. It wasn’t exactly what she had hoped for, but she didn’t feel any strong emotions about it. What occupied her thoughts, however, was the meeting spot she had arranged with Carlos.

Pausing in her step, she pulled out her phone, deciding to cut straight to the chase and call him directly. The phone rang for what seemed like an eternity until the sound was abruptly cut off by a long beep, indicating his automated voicemail.

“Not even personalised,” she scoffed, hanging up, tossing her phone into her bag, and continuing, resigned to the idea of either wandering aimlessly forever or eventually finding Carlos.

However, she didn’t get far before colliding with someone. She stumbled backward a bit before regaining her balance, and as she looked up, her eyes widened in recognition.

Charles stood opposite her, his expression shifting from shock to a warm smile, though his eyebrows remained slightly furrowed. “Hi,” he breathed, the warmth of his breath reaching and spreading across Y/N’s face. “You’re… here.”

Y/N’s gaze swept over his tousled hair, a few strands sticking to his forehead adorned with tiny beads of sweat, some trailing down the sides of his slightly flushed face. “You’re sweaty. Very sweaty,” she blurted out, immediately regretting her awkward observation. But it had been a year since their last exchange, so it was understandable that things felt a bit awkward between them.

A few chuckles escaped Charles, immediately bringing a smile to Y/N’s face. “Thanks, I didn’t notice."

She exhaled a laugh, and then Charles added, “Thank you for coming, I really appreciate it.” Shielding his eyes from the harsh glare of the sun with his hand, he squinted at her. “Can I ask though, was this meant to be a surprise or something?”

“Ah, Charles, you’ve met my friend, Y/N,” Carlos interrupted from behind as he came to a stop beside her.

Y/N smiled awkwardly. “Uhm... Carlos actually invited me, so that's why I'm here."

“You two know each other?” Charles inquired, raising an eyebrow in curiosity.

“My dad lives in Spain, remember?” Y/N reminded him, shrugging. “Our families are pretty close.”

“Right…” Charles nodded, though he couldn’t shake off the slight hint of disbelief in his voice. After all, he knew Carlos was dating someone already, so he wasn’t sure why he felt that way. And as for Y/N, she was free to do as she pleased. After all, that date they had talked about last year never even happened. They had no history, no reason for him to feel jealous.

But he did anyway.

Wanting to diffuse the sudden tension settling between the three of them, Y/N exclaimed, “But it’s good to see you again. And you did really well. Congrats on P4, seriously.”

Charles smiled, and for the first time today, it was genuine. He wasn’t entirely satisfied with P4; he had wanted a podium finish and had come close to it. But for some reason, if she was happy, so was he.

“Thanks—” His smile faltered when an arm snaked around his torso, his girlfriend Amélie taking her place beside him and planting a quick kiss on his cheek. Without wasting a second, his gaze shifted to Y/N, just in time to catch the way her eyes widened before she swallowed, her expression now impassive.

Shock and confusion swirled through Y/N’s body. She hadn’t expected Charles to have a girlfriend, so when she felt her heart crack slightly, it made sense. But she wasn’t going to show it—at least, not purposely she wasn’t.

Charles furrowed his brows as he regarded the girl standing in front of him. A pang of guilt nagged at him, though he couldn’t quite pinpoint why: they were never anything more than friends. And judging by the way neither of them had kept up with one another, you could barely even call it that.

Maybe they were more like strangers with a couple of good memories and unfulfilled promises?

“You alright, mate?” asked Carlos, pulling Charles out of his reverie.

Clearing his throat, Charles replied, “Yeah, yeah... Uhm Amélie, this is Y/N, my… friend.” The word came out almost as a question, but he pressed on. “Y/N, meet Amélie, my girlfriend.”

Charles wasn’t sure what he expected, but Y/N’s cheerfulness was definitely not it. “Hey,” she smiled and waved.

Slowly, tensions began to dissipate as all four of them became engrossed in conversation—though in reality, it was more like three. Y/N found herself too preoccupied with the realisation that Charles had a girlfriend now. It was a simple fact, yet it carried a weight: it meant he hadn't spent the year turning down people left and right, like she had, in hopes of a maybe.

One day in 2022

"Y/N, thank God you’re here!" Amélie's voice echoed the moment Y/N stepped into the living room, causing her to freeze in her tracks. "Uh, hey?" she replied, her eyes scanning the partly decorated room before settling on Charles, who sent her a small wave.

She raised her brows and forced a smile, though it faltered quickly—she and Charles had grown apart. Truthfully, Y/N had contemplated not showing up today; faking an illness or something and making sure to stay at home for a few days—Monaco was too small to risk being accidentally spotted.

But she came.

She came because Charles called.

Two days ago, he had called her in the middle of the night, asking if she was planning to fake being sick to avoid seeing him. And he was right—exactly what Y/N had been contemplating. So, when her first phone call with Charles in two years challenged the very idea in her mind that they had grown apart, it confused her. After all, she was sure she was a blank page now, yet he still seemed to be able to read her.

Snapping out of her daze, Y/N watched as Amélie paced erratically, her brows furrowing with every step. "What's going on with her?" Y/N asked, turning to Charles for an explanation.

He chuckled, approaching her. "It's the cake," he explained. "Amélie ordered it, but now it needs to be picked up sooner than planned because they're closing earlier than usual for some reason. So, now we have a problem, obviously."

"Why don't you just go pick it up?" Y/N leaned into him, her voice barely above a whisper, her eyes still fixed on Amélie, who was now engaged in a fervent phone call.

"Apparently, I'm too clumsy."

"You are."

Charles chuckled, but his laughter was cut short when Amélie suddenly gasped, her eyes darting between Y/N and him as she rushed towards them. “Okay, guys, everyone will be here soon. If I stay and finish all this off, you two can quickly go collect the cake. So, if one person drives and the other holds it really tightly, that should work, right?”

“Sounds good,” Y/N chimed in.

“I agree,” Charles added.

“Alright,” Amélie beckoned them out of the living room and towards the front door. “Go on.”

“I love you,” Amélie said, leaning in for a kiss. But as she moved closer, Charles instinctively turned his head, causing her lips to land on his cheek instead of his mouth. His gaze had shifted to Y/N, who stood in the front yard, seemingly fixated on the grass.

“Yeah... love you,” he muttered absentmindedly, his attention still captivated by the girl just a few feet away from him.

Normally, Charles had no issue displaying affection for his girlfriend in front of others, but Y/N made it difficult. Whenever she was around—whether at family gatherings, parties, or Grand Prix events—his eyes always seemed to gravitate towards her.

“Please, don’t take too long!” Amélie shouted as the door slammed shut.

Amidst the occasional chirping of birds, a palpable silence settled between them. Y/N stared into the distance, while Charles observed her from the corner of his eye, noticing subtle changes since their last encounter. Her hair, for instance, was slightly shorter—a minor detail, yet one he couldn't help but notice.

With a loud clap, Charles gestured towards his car, parked discreetly to the side. “That way.”

Following his lead, Y/N entered through the passenger seat. However, as the car sprang to life and its dashboard lights flickered on, Charles let out a frustrated groan.

“What's wrong?” Y/N inquired.

Charles shook his head for a moment, muttering, “I told him to fill up the gas…”

“Oh,” Y/N exhaled, resting her head against the soft leather headrest. “So, what now?”

Charles' eyes lit up with excitement as he sat up eagerly, turning to face her. "We've got some old bikes in the shed, so if you want to—"

"You want us to ride rusty old bikes, while carrying a cake?" Y/N interjected, her serious expression quickly giving way to laughter.

"...Yeah?"

Y/N narrowed her gaze, appraising Charles for a moment before rolling her eyes and pushing the door open. "This is so going to backfire. I can't believe I'm doing this."

Charles couldn't help but smile as he watched Y/N exit the car. He had a feeling she wouldn't turn this idea down, and he was glad he was right. It meant that despite the years, things hadn't changed too much between them. She was still the same Y/N he knew, and he hoped he was still the Charles she was willing to have a date with.

"Don't tell me I'm going to have to do this by myself now. You coming or what?" Her yell pierced through the car, prompting him to jump out and hurry towards the shed.

By the time he finally reached the shed, Y/N had already claimed a bike—and surprisingly, it was his. Charles used to guard that bike fiercely when he was younger, not allowing anyone, not even for a few minutes. But now, as he watched her mount it, he felt no trace of that possessiveness, not even a hint.

Perhaps it was because he had outgrown that childish behaviour, or maybe it was something else entirely. Either way, he couldn't deny the genuine happiness that bubbled up within him at the sight.

Now, if it were Amélie riding his bike at that moment, he wasn't quite sure he would feel the same way.

“Race you to the bakery?” Y/N grinned mischievously.

A wide smile immediately spread across Charles' face. “Sure, once I get my hands on a bike.”

“No,” she retorted, already starting to pedal. “You snooze, you lose.”

Racing to grab Lorenzo’s bike, Charles jumped on it, yelling, “Cheater!”

When he finally caught up to her, Y/N was no longer riding her bike but pulling it alongside her, causing him to slow down beside her. “What’s wrong? Why aren’t you riding?” One corner of his mouth curled upward as he fixed her with a knowing look, coming to a full stop. “Oh, did you finally realise that cheating isn’t the way to go?”

“Says you,” Y/N retorted, though her chuckles rang loud and clear as Charles fell into step with her.

“Anyway,” she pointed down at her bike, “the chain’s come loose. So yeah, I was right, this was a bad idea, and Amélie is going to kill us, and poor Pascale won’t have a birthday cake.”

“Wow, don’t be too optimistic now,” Charles teased, earning an elbow to his side. “We’re not too far from the bakery now, so I say let’s not worry until we get to the ‘how do we get back home in time’ part. What do you say?”

Y/N turned to Charles, her eyes lingering on his features longer than necessary. “Okay,” she finally nodded, “sounds like a plan.”

But her words seemed to fall on deaf ears. In the time she spent gazing at Charles, he had been doing the same, unwilling to move on from that moment quite as quickly as she had.

Stopping in his steps, Y/N continued a few more feet before finally noticing his hesitation and halting her movements, turning back. “Do you want Amélie to murder us?” she joked, but her humour faded when she saw Charles’ serious expression remain unchanged.

“Okay, what’s the matter—”

Charles cut her off with a sigh. “Why don’t we talk anymore, Y/N?”

“What do you mean? We’re talking right now.”

“Come on, seriously,” Charles walked up beside her.

Y/N just shrugged, her mouth suddenly as dry as the Sahara desert. “I don’t know…”

“Well, I don't either, so can we please just start over then?” Charles proposed, his tone tired of the tension and the walking on eggshells. It was too much when all he wanted was to be close to her, to laugh like they used to before everything went haywire.

Y/N looked off to the side, musing over his words for a moment, before meeting his gaze again with a small smile. “Okay, fine, I guess.”

“Wow, you seem really excited,” Charles remarked, flashing a wide grin.

“I really do, don't I? Now, if you don’t mind,” Y/N started walking again, “I really do not feel like being killed today, so let’s fucking go.”

“Alright, alright, I’m coming.”

2:31 ──────ㅇ────── 4:45

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aurynsia · 27 days ago

Text

Unrequited, Terrifying Chapter 3

James Potter x Reader

Summary: A boy in your class haunts your search for your secret admirer, uncovering some feelings you thought you lost years before…

Warnings: Some very subtle sexual implications, secret admirer trope, extremely fluffy, nervous!james x shy!reader, some subtle wolfstar action in the background, idiots in love, oc!friends, lovesick!james, no use of Y/N, James is a virgin, reader is referred to with she/her pronouns, oblivious!reader, Remus being the most supportive and helpful friend James has ever had, reader is a bit of a nerd, NOT EDITED!

Word count: 1.5K

Series Masterlist

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

Potions concluded with the setting sun. You adjusted in your seat to reach your bag, dropping supplies into its dark void. You had managed to phase the unusual situation you were in to the back of your mind, forgetting your secret admirer as you completed the class work. This was, however, short lived.

You turned back to your desk and spotted a folded note on its surface, the paper identical to the one you received the night before. You attempted to conceal your growing curiosity and excitement as you swiftly snatched it and launched yourself out of your chair, bag in hand.

Turning to leave the room, you thought of your friends’ ecstatic faces at the discovery of a new note, before-

Bump.

“Oh Merlin, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to…” You turned your frame to face the source of disruption, air pushed from your lungs for just a second. There stood a tentative James Potter, a splattering of rose appearing on his cheeks at your eye contact. “Um, I- I’m sorry!” He rambled, rushing away before you could even consider the interaction.

Your stomach quietly dipped and flipped at the contact, creating an unfamiliar warmth which you quickly forced down as you shook your head with a small smile. James Potter, ladies man, smooth talker and prank puller couldn’t even form a coherent sentence around you. Strange. Though, at least he apologised this time.

You exited the classroom, remembering the note you held in your hand, and practically skipped towards the Gryffindor common room with bubbling enthusiasm.

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

“And then I just froze! I can’t help it, her eyes are so captivating and she smells really good and the way she clutched the note so protectively made my heart flutter!” James finished his rambling, looking around his dorm in disbelief as his friends snickered affectionately.

“Good Merlin, Prongs! Every attractive bird you bump into like that at post-match parties would be subject to a dousing of charm, flirtations, and charisma by now…” Sirius quipped with a smirk, amused by the boy’s rare, flustered look hiding behind his hands.

“I mean, of course she’s a pretty one, Prongs, but what’s stopping you from wooing her like all the rest?” Silence fell on the group as James considered Sirius’ words. “Well, I don’t know, Prongs, maybe it’s because- well, you know, you’ve been…saving yourself…for h-“ Peter attempted, choosing not to finish his sentence after the entourage of warning glares met his eyes.

“James, Peter might have a point…for once…” Remus spoke after some consideration. “You obviously view her differently to all the other girls you’ve spoken to, and I know the reason you hesitate with all the rest is because you wish they were her…” Remus glanced at the raven-haired boy sitting on his bed as he said those last words, who was unaware as he moved to console James.

The young Potter was arched over, with his elbows on his knees and his face in the palms of his hands. His bed dipped under the weight of Sirius taking a seat beside him.

“Prongs, let me put it bluntly,” Sirius began, “you’ll have to either man up, chat her up and finally get the girl you deserve, or move on and bloody kiss someone else already. It’s no use pining over her if she doesn’t even know you’re pining! Now what did that second note say?”

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

“‘You look so pretty today, I really like how you did your hair! And thank you for all your explanations in the class discussion, it really helped me stay on top of my grades with a beautiful thing like you sitting near me.’ He drew a little winking face next to that, ‘Forever yours.” Charlie and Hope burst into a fit of giggles after you recited the most recent note.

“He’s obsessed with you! This is so cute!” Charlie squealed, holding your shoulders and shaking you slightly for emphasis. “You know what this means, right? He must be in your potions class!” Hope stated with a smirk, leaning across from her seat on the floor to pick up your list of potential suitors.

“Let’s see, that leaves us with about…five options!” She exclaimed. Your bewildered expression contrasted her excitement, crawling over to her position on the dorm room floor. One, two, three, four…five. You counted the Gryffindor boys in your potions class as your eyes widened.

One name stuck out to you in particular: James Potter. As if sharing the same thought, Charlie brightened as she spotted the same name on the paper. “Potter is in that class! Oh my, my…you are quite the catch aren’t you, love?” She teased, inching closer to your warming face. “Ooh! You’re blushing! Are you sure you really got over him all those years ago, hmm?” Hope joined Charlie in closing the distance between all three of you as your cheeks gave you away.

“Of course I’m over him! That was in fourth year…well, maybe…ugh, it doesn’t matter! It’s probably not him anyway, I mean, I can’t imagine him finding the time to do any of this with his adoring fan club constantly surrounding him…” you muttered.

“But it could really be him! I mean, you were saying he gets all nervous and awkward around you, there’s a chance that could mean-“ You stopped Charlie’s rabbit hole of conspiracy, choosing not to dwell on the matter longer.

“There are four others on this list, it’s best if we cover all our bases.” Hope reasoned, joining you in rationality and convincing Charlie to do the same. “Let’s keep an eye out for any of these distinguished gentlemen paying extra attention to our darling friend.”

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

The quiet night caused the atmosphere of the Gryffindor house to soften under the soft glow of the crescent moon. Remus couldn’t sleep. It was almost too peaceful, and he didn’t like it.

Sitting up in his bed, he glanced over the figures of his friends, their chests softly rising with each breath they took. Slinking into the cloak of darkness by the door, he slowly opened the door and forged a path to the common room.

There, sat under the light of a lamp, was a flowing cascade of your hair over the back of the couch. You were hunched over paper, concentrating on your History of Magic homework.

“Hey, can I join you?” Remus attempted not to startle you as he rounded the corner, joining you on the coach after you noticed his presence and nodded in confirmation.

Remus was always the more mature member of the Marauders, more focused on his studies than pranking innocent students.

“So, listen,” He began after a beat, “You’re working on History of Magic, right? I’ve noticed you’re really excelling in that class and, not to brag, but I’m quite good at it too.” You met his gaze. “I know, I’ve seen your writing. You clearly work hard.” You replied, instilling that Gryffindor courage in every word that would have normally been absent during interactions such as this, often causing you to dismiss the compliment with a shy smile.

Remus allowed himself a small grin at your unfamiliar nonchalance, continuing his proposition. “Oh, thank you! Well, I was wondering if you wanted to team up. I could be your study partner, and we could top the class together! I’ll teach you anything you’re not sure about, and I’d ask for the same in return.” You turned his proposal over in your mind, causing a small moment of silence between you two.

“There are some years I’m not so familiar with, and I certainly could do with the clarification. So sure, Remus, I’ll be your study partner!” You smiled warmly, comfortable in the newfound knowledge that the boy wasn’t a possible face behind your recently received love confessions. You found his proposition to be a friendly gesture, and far more genuine than any action you’d expect from a Marauder.

“Great!” He cheered, “We can start tomorrow. I often sit with my friends in the library, if you’re willing to join…” Remus trailed off, hoping you’d sit with his lovestruck friend for a few hours in the name of good grades.

“I’ll be there, Remus, thank you for the offer.” The words escaped your mouth before you had a chance to consider them, but Remus was already delighted by your acceptance. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, love, goodnight.”

He flashed a soft smile your way as he stood to return to his bed, leaving you bathing in the light of the lamp with an optimistic fluttering in your stomach.

You decided to leave it be, along with the hope that the boy with the rounded glasses would be there to get all flustered over you again, nagging that sweet, romantic side of your brain.

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

A/N: Woohoo, here we go! I hope you’re all excited for some tooth aching fluff in the next chapter because it looks like reader is warming up to the Marauders >.< Thank you so much for reading this series, and be sure to like and reblog! Comment to be added to the tag list so you don’t miss chapter 4!

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sansaorgana · 9 months ago

Note

Girl!Dad Gale on his day off and his wife finds him and their kid playing tea party with Gale as the newest princess of the land

hello, dear! 😍 you have no idea how happy this request made me and how much fun I had writing this 😌 I literally didn't want to stop writing, that's how much I got into this little domestic scenario with Buck 😂

[ PART TWO ]

my inbox is open for blurb/short fic requests for major cleven 🤗

You had a busy day and you hated it because it happened to be a day off for Buck. He rarely had weekdays completely off and you wished you could just enjoy some time together as a family but you had to pick up some shopping orders from town and you had a doctor’s appointment, too.

“Are you sure you can do that?” You asked Buck as you were putting a coat on in a hurry, checking the clock on the wall with the corner of your eye. Your bus would leave in less than ten minutes.

“It’s not the first time for me” Buck chuckled and adjusted little Peggy on his hip. Well, she wasn’t that little. She would be four soon. The time flied way too fast.

“Okay, okay, see you later then. I’ll warm up dinner when I'm back but you can make sandwiches in the meantime,” you leaned in to kiss him on the cheek and kiss your baby girls’ forehead before leaving in a hurry.

Buck approached the window and watched you cross the street to disappear behind the corner.

“Are you going to wave mummy goodbye?” He asked the little girl in his arms and she giggled before waving her hand. “Good girl,” he kissed her cheek. “What do you want to do now?” He asked.

“I want to play with dolls,” her eyes sparkled at the idea. “Like I do with mummy.”

“Alright,” Buck nodded. He was rarely playing with dolls. In fact, almost never.

So when he took Peggy upstairs to her room, he started to look around awkwardly, not knowing where the dolls were. But Peggy was already unpacking one of the boxes and putting the dolls and their clothes on the carpet. Buck sat down and watched his little girl in awe. She was so sweet and so pretty and so smart for her age. Of course all children were like that in their parents’ eyes.

“And what now?” He asked when all the dolls and clothes were already on the carpet.

“You choose the doll you want to play with,” she sighed, a little irritated that she has to explain such basic things.

“I want this one,” he picked up the one with golden hair. “Can I?”

“You chose this one because she’s got hair like yours,” his little girl giggled and he realised that she was right. He didn’t even think of that.

“And which one are you choosing?” He asked her.

“This one,” she pointed at the doll looking the most like her mum. Buck smiled to himself and nodded his head. Then he took a better look at his doll. It didn’t have any clothes on. “Do we choose clothes now?” He asked.

“Yes! It’s the best part, daddy!” Peggy clapped her hands and Buck reached his hand out to grab one of the dresses. She pouted. “No! Not this one, daddy! I want this one!”

“But I chose it first,” he teased.

“It’s my favourite dress!” She gave him puppy eyes and he gave the dress to her.

“What do we say?”

“Thank you,” she giggled and began to dress her doll.

Buck chose a different dress and wanted to put it on his doll as well but he was doing it clumsily. He didn’t expect it to be actually quite difficult.

“You’re so clumsy, daddy,” Peggy laughed and took the doll from him to finish dressing her up.

“Not with everything,” Buck protested.

“Really?” She looked up at him as if she couldn’t believe that.

“Well, remember how I fixed the stove the other day?” He tried to remind her.

“Ah, that,” she shrugged her arms and he tried very hard not to laugh at her reaction.

However, he still wanted to impress his little girl.

“And before you were born, daddy was a pilot,” he told her.

“A pilot? What’s that?” She asked, not really interested.

“I was flying planes,” he explained and she looked at him again.

Peggy tilted her head and her eyes widened.

“Like the one we were on last summer?” She asked.

“Not exactly,” Buck caressed her hair and tried to find the right words. “Mine were smaller.”

“Why?”

“There are different kinds of planes. Some planes are to take people from one place to another and other planes…” His voice broke. “Nevermind,” he finished, angry at himself for even starting the subject.

“Okay,” thankfully Peggy only shrugged her arms. “But you are clumsy, daddy. Otherwise you wouldn’t have so many scars. Even on your face,” she chuckled.

Buck smiled sadly at her. He couldn’t tell her now, she was too young to understand. And too young to realise she hurt him with her words. But he wasn’t angry at her. He would never be angry at his little girl. If she had known, she would never say that.

“Yes, I suppose I am clumsy sometimes,” he decided to agree. “What do we do with these dolls?” He changed the subject quickly and grabbed his doll.

“With mummy, we sometimes make tea parties for the dolls and us,” Peggy said.

“We can do that,” Buck nodded his head.

“You have to help me, daddy. The box with tea cups and plates is up there,” she pointed at the box on the top shelf. “Mummy doesn’t want me to play with them without her around because it was expensive.”

“Ah, yes,” Buck chuckled as he stood up. He remembered that purchase well. He reached out for the box and Peggy gasped. “What is it?”

“Nothing, daddy. I was scared you’d drop it,” she giggled and he sighed. She would now call him clumsy all the time for the next few weeks.

He placed the box down carefully and they began to take out all the cups and plates.

“Should I make real tea?” He asked Peggy.

“Don’t be silly, daddy. It’s just play pretend!” His daughter scolded him. “Anyway, we need a Princess. The tea parties are for the Princess.”

“So, for you?” Buck smiled at her.

“No, usually it’s mummy,” she explained.

“But today it can be you,” he proposed.

“But I don’t want to be a Princess. I want to be a fairy,” she pouted. “You have to be the Princess, daddy,” she insisted.

Buck blushed. He knew that they were home alone and no one would see him like this but it still felt odd to become a Princess. Even for a play pretend with his daughter. He wanted to make her happy, though. So he shyly nodded his head to agree.

She clapped her hands, excited and she got up to give him a loving hug. Then she handed him a crown made of paper that had also been in the box with the cups and plates.

“Mummy made it,” Peggy said. “Be careful, don’t break it,” she added and placed it on Buck’s head.

You entered the house and took your coat off quietly. You didn’t want to make any noise because it was around that time when Peggy should be napping and you assumed Buck was either reading something for work at that time or napping with her. You fixed your ruffled hair in the mirror and quietly went upstairs to check on your daughter first.

But walking the stairs, you already heard her soft giggles and Buck’s voice. You sighed. He had to forget about her nap time.

You opened the door to Peggy’s room and widened your eyes at the sight you had never expected to witness. Your husband – Major Cleven, the war hero – was sitting on the carpet surrounded by dolls with a tiny cup in his hand and a paper crown on his head.

When Peggy was born, you were afraid that he would actually prefer a son. He could talk to him about the planes and all the other things that men found interesting. You were afraid that Buck wouldn’t get into the girly things as much. And he was often awkward about them. When you were picking birthday presents for Peggy or taking her to the events for little girls, he was always visibly out of place. He wasn’t a bad dad – far from that! He would die for his little girl as he was absolutely mesmerised by her. She had him wrapped around her little finger in a way that sometimes was even making you feel slightly jealous. But you would never expect him to actually have a tea party as a Princess.

“What… What is happening here?” You burst out with laughter and Buck blushed. “Oh, what a lovely sight,” you added and you sat down on the carpet, too. “Who’s the fairest Princess of the land?” You teased.

“Daddy is!” Peggy answered and ran up to you to give you a hug. You kissed the top of her head. “Guess what Princess daddy is?”

“Princess Handsome?” You joked and she winced at that. “Princess Brave?” You tried again and she shook her head. “What then?”

“Princess Clumsy!” Peggy giggled and you furrowed your brows.

“But daddy is not clumsy,” you protested. “I’d say he is the opposite.”

Buck took his paper crown off and tried to put it on your head but you pushed his hand away gently.

“It’s yours today, Your Royal Highness,” you grinned at him and he sighed, putting the paper crown back.

“He is clumsy! Look!” Peggy approached her daddy and pointed at one of the scars on his cheeks. She giggled.

“Oh,” you gasped. Your smile dropped and you didn’t know what to say. “But…”

“Don’t,” Gale shook his head. “It’s fine,” he assured you.

But for you it wasn’t fine.

“Daddy doesn’t have scars because he is clumsy,” you tried to explain softly.

“No?” Peggy bit on her fist as her eyes widened. She looked at Buck, surprised.

“Daddy has them because… Because he was very brave,” you added.

“(Y/N), enough,” Buck whispered.

“Like a superhero,” you finished.

“Really?!” Peggy gasped.

“Hardly,” Buck laughed nervously. “I’m not a superhero.”

“I’m sorry for saying you’re clumsy!” Peggy put her hands around his neck and hugged him tight. “Why didn’t you tell me that you’re a superhero?!”

“Because it’s a secret, dollie,” he tried to explain and rubbed her back. He gave you a scolding look and you rolled your eyes.

You knew that Buck didn’t like to be called a hero. To him, all his achievements were just a duty. Something that had to be done to serve his country. And he didn’t feel proud of killing people either.

But you couldn’t let your own daughter bully him for the next few weeks about something like that. Even if she didn’t mean it in a bad way. She loved her daddy but he was too soft with her and she would often take advantage of it and tease him a lot.

“Anyway,” you cleared your throat, “Princess Daddy forgot that it’s Peggy’s nap time.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Buck stood up with Peggy in his arms to carry her to bed.

“No! I’m not sleepy, no!” She protested and he chuckled.

You began to slowly put all the dolls and cups back into the boxes.

“You have to, sweetheart,” Buck insisted and she sighed, defeated.

He put her down and sat on the edge of the bed as you continued to clean the mess from the carpet. Buck was telling Peggy a story about some knight and a fairy – because she preferred to be a fairy these days – and you put a blanket over your baby girl before taking the crown off of his head gently and putting it back into the box.

“She’s asleep now,” you whispered as you stood behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Come with me, I have to tell you something,” you tried not to smile too widely to hide your excitement and not spoil the revelation too fast.

He looked up at you, confused. You took him by his hand and dragged him out of the room and then into your bedroom.

“What’s going on?” He asked as he closed the door behind him.

“Well,” you started and your eyes sparkled. You were so happy you felt as if you were about to explode, “I have exciting news.”

Buck approached you, confused. God, he looked so adorable, still blushing a little and with his hair ruffled from that paper crown.

“I’m pregnant,” you nearly screamed and then you shut your mouth with your hand, scared you would wake Peggy up.

At first he didn’t react as if he needed a moment to understand the meaning of your words. And then his whole face lightened up as he gave you a wide, sweet smile.

He picked you up and spun you around as you giggled softly.

“Put me down, I’m getting sick,” you laughed and he obeyed instantly. “Thank you,” you breathed out. You fixed his hair and brought his face closer to yours. “Maybe this time it will be a boy,” you whispered.

“Maybe,” Buck pulled you closer by your waist. “Maybe not,” he added. “I don’t mind being a Princess sometimes.”

“Really?” You burst out laughing at him saying that. He nodded, seriously.

“I’d do everything to see my girls smile.”

MASTERLIST || BUCK MASTERLIST

#sansaorgana: Answered #groovin2beats #*buck #lilysfiction #gale cleven x reader #austin butler x reader

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ljaylmaoo · 3 months ago

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Only Yours

hook x fem!reader

summary: you and hook have a relationship that everyone wishes they could experience and someone tries to break you two apart

genre: very angsty, also extremely fluffy

warnings: hook is really soft in this lol, hickeyss, arguments, there’s a kiss without consent in this, I think that’s it

a/n: hii! this is my FIRST post and one-shot that I wrote out of pure boredom lol. if there’s any typos sorry, I wrote this from 2 am to 7 am in one go lol. please let me know what you think after, AND PLEASE feel free to send requests! as I had a lot of fun writing this and would love to write more! hope you enjoy! thank you :)

word count: 3.6k

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

To say you were nervous was an understatement.

At the moment, you were doing the final touches of your makeup in anticipation of Castlecoming. You weren’t very fond of wearing a dress. Sure you loved fashion, but dresses? Most certainly not. But you promised Bridget that if she got Ella to wear a dress, you would too. You also wanted to surprise your boyfriend James who would never expect you to actually wear a gown such as this one. So there you stood, admiring your figure in the gold, arched, full length mirror that sat in the corner of your dorm after brushing on some highlighter on the highest part of your cheekbones and tip of your nose. You cursed at yourself for liking the way the gown looked on you.

“Wow..”

The sudden low whisper like voice from the left of you made you jump a bit then relaxed when you recognized the comforting voice of your boyfriend which instantly washed away the nerves you previously had. You glanced over your shoulder, a radiant smile that couldn’t be hidden even if you tried crept up as you caught the sight of your breathtakingly beautiful lover carrying a bouquet of your favourite flowers in one hand and a box with a bow that held a corsage that luckily matched your dress perfectly.

He slowly made his way up to you, taking in every detail of the rare sight that lied in front of him. He gently set down the box on your vanity, “Art has no depiction that’s fitting of your description. Even the most ignorant would applaud and long for my loves radiance.”

A soft blush washed over your cheeks, “says you, my pretty boy.” You giggle taking the flowers he presented to you with a bow and placed your arms around his neck with him pulling your waist close to him. James has always been a romantic. Every compliment he gives makes Shakespeare’s poems seem dull. Everyone in the academy ached to have your kind of love. And the girls were envious of how James showed his love for you. Always showing you off every chance he gets. He was proud to call you his. He also could never keep his hands off of you, always had to be touching you someway twenty four seven.

Though you two were infatuated with love for one another, there would be the odd argument that would leave you not talking for a day or two which was usually due to his mean and sometimes cruel words that he really didn’t mean. He was still a VK after all.

“Doesn’t my darling look ravishing today?” Was something he would ask the VKs daily as he watched from afar with googoo eyes while smiling like an idiot as you were laughing and talking with your friends, not taking his eyes off you once. Even if you were in a fight and not talking that day.

“Aren’t you guys in a fight?”

“Doesn’t make her any less breathtaking and heavenly to look at.”

These days were torture for him. He tried to be tough and not show how much he was suffering without you, but it never lasted long. By the time he finally breaks he comes knocking on your door with a teddy and “I’m sorry” flowers with him apologizing profusely almost leaving him in tears begging you to take him back explaining how lonely his bed is and how he missed being tangled up with you in your bed every night having the ability to hold you close to him as you drifted off to sleep, and of course you can never stay mad at him. Especially when he’s making himself look like a fool in front of others as they passed by not caring if they judged him by how pathetic he looked, his mind only being set on getting you back.

He was also very protective and possessive of you. If anyone was mean to you or dared try to lay a hand on you flirtatiously, he wasn’t afraid to handle them himself or he would aggressively yet still carefully grab your waist, sometimes with his hook, and kiss you in front of them before smirking at them and watched with satisfaction as they rolled their eyes and walked off. He’d also sometimes give you a few hickeys, making sure that they were as visible as possible. you both wore a necklace with each other’s initials engraved and a diamond heart.

He had also gifted you a beautiful promise ring for your one year anniversary and you’ve worn it ever since.

His favourite pastime was gazing at you while you did your schoolwork or as you slept in his arms. “My heart is so full of you, I can hardly call it my own.” Is just one of the many examples he would say whenever you got insecure and were in denial. He always made sure you knew his devotion to you was for eternity.

You were soulmates without a doubt. Twin flames.

He kissed you passionately, hungrily placing his soft plump lips on yours. You melted into his touch, smiling at his desperation to get as physically close to you as possible in anyway he could. You tried to pull away to catch your breath but he wouldn’t let you, “James” you laughed with his lips still attached to yours, lightly pushing him away at his chest.

He finally pulled away, “yes, love?” He smiled still staring at your lips, lovingly

“I could barely breathe” you laughed again, “I’m sorry darling, I just can’t ever get enough of you.” He shamelessly admitted. You both stayed close admiring each other’s features, leaving no room in between. His hands still firm on your lower back as you stroked his hair. His hair was probably your favourite feature of his. It was soft and always the perfect length, swept back.

“I love you so much.” you whispered looking into his eyes while fixing his collar and necklaces after messing it up a bit from the kiss

“Not as much as I do you, sweetheart.”

“I don’t think so” you replied knowing you always lose the ‘I love you more’ arguments. He laughed, “oh darling, we both know that’s not possible. My love for you will remain as infinite as the stars.” He said while caressing your cheek. You placed your hand on top of his and smiled shyly. He grabbed the box off of the vanity and took the corsage out, he gently took your hand and slid it onto your wrist then kissed your hand softly. “There you are my love.” He said while looking up at you. You had your hand on your chest, “oh my goodness! Thank you, it’s beautiful.” You said while looking at it in awe. He smiled, “of course darling.” He gave you a quick kiss and lead you to the door and opened it, “after you, gorgeous.”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You and James entered the ballroom together with your arm wrapped around his and hands intertwined looking around the huge decorated room. It was everything you’d imagined it would be. Everyone dressed up in breathtakingly beautiful suits and gowns scattered around the room mingling with their friends or dancing with their loved ones as music played in the background. James watched you in adoration, the amazement in your eyes made them sparkle along with the light glistening from the chandeliers above. The two of you got some glances from your peers of course as you were named ‘Best Couple’ in the yearbook and everyone adored your relationship for the most part. Among the people who were jealous, there was one girl in particular that absolutely despised your relationship. That girl goes by the name of Aria. (if your name is Aria I’M SORRY LMAO) She hated how happy you guys were especially of how loving James was towards you and hated how much people adored your relationship.

She was also James’ ex girlfriend.

They were together for eight months and broke up just five months before you both officially started dating. During those eight dreadful months, they were extremely toxic. They would get into pointless heated arguments on a daily basis at school, some even resulting in James earning a slap to the face, but then would be seen back together by the end of the day making out by the lockers or something. You knew of James beforehand because he was part of Uliana’s crew and also because you had to pass his locker almost everyday in order to get to class and that was usually where they would have their fights. He never paid any attention to you at first, but when Uliana began tormenting Bridget, you caught his eye. He’d constantly try to flirt with you and you would often find him to be staring at you whenever you weren’t looking. One thing led to another and after four months of his many attempts to try and get to you, you finally gave in and decided to give him a chance and a month later, it was made official. You don’t know what changed in him for him to treat you the complete opposite of how he treated Aria and she hated you for it though she couldn’t do anything about it because she knew what he and the VK’s would do if she did. So she always judged from afar, only doing as much as giving you a glare everytime you made eye contact. She wanted to try and sabotage your relationship the night of Castlecoming and break the two of you up, so she came with a plan.

Aria was with her friends when one of them spoke up, “woah, they look grossly fabulous tonight..” she turned and her jaw dropped instantly when she saw the two of you on the other side of the room talking to Uliana and the rest of the group, James spinning you around to show off your gown. She boiled with rage and turned back to her friends, “yeah, we are definitely going to break them up tonight.”

As James was talking with Morgie, you spotted your friends Bridget and Ella so you lightly tapped his shoulder and leaned in to whisper making sure Uliana didn’t notice as she was currently talking with Maleficent beside you, “I’m going to go say hi to Bridget and Ella, okay?” He looked down at you and kissed gave you a quick kiss, “okay, love.” You gave one more kiss on the cheek before heading off towards your friends.

Bridget squealed with excitement as she saw you approaching them, “oh my gosh! Y/n?! You look amazing!” She came up and pulled you into a hug, squeezing tightly to express how proud she was. “I know, I know” you jokingly said after she let go while blushing a bit. You smiled and hugged Ella, “wow I didn’t actually think I’d see you in a dress, like ever.” Ella gave a small smile and laughed, “I could say the same to you.” You scoffed, “well of course I did. We wouldn’t wanna disappoint our girl here now, would we?” You said while patting Bridget on the shoulder who was bursting with excitement jumping up and down while clapping her hands, “okay we need! To take pictures, come on!” She insisted before pulling you both over to the Photo Booth.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

It was later into the night and you were dancing with James, Ella had to go home due to her strict curfew her stepmother gave her, and Bridget went back to her dorm to let you and James have some time together. Aria and her friends watched you with rage as you were gazing into each other’s eyes lovingly, waiting for the perfect moment to begin her plan. He spun you around as the song ended and kissed your hand before leading you off the dance floor, “could I get you another drink, my love?” He questioned, “yeah, sure. I’ll be over there I just have to go to the bathroom quick.” He nodded and the two of you went your separate ways.

Aria smirked at her friends as the first part of her plan had come. She slyly walked off to the fruit punch table and stood in front of it waiting for James to walk up. “Hi James.” She said suspiciously sweet, he only rolled his eyes and scoffed, “what do you want? Can you move, please?” Aria gave a fake pout, “what? All I did was say hi.” She said innocently, “oh did you want some punch? I’ll get them for you.” She turned and grabbed two cups, “two right? One for you and one for your little girlfriend?” James had his arms crossed and stood impatiently, looking away from her, “yup.” Aria giggled and poured the first one, “here’s yours” she smiled before turning to pour the other. James took a sip of the drink while he waited.

A few moments later, you finished touching up your make up after washing your hands in the bathroom and walked out towards the punch table but you stopped in your tracks. There, in front of the punch table was Aria who had forcefully pulled James into an unexpected kiss. Your heart shattered at the sight. You made eye contact with James who had a shocked and angry expression that you couldn’t see. Your eyes welled up with tears before you ran out of the ballroom. James pushed Aria off him, “get off of me! What the hell, Aria?” He scolded before shoving the punch into her hands and ran after you. She watched him run after you with a smirk taking a sip in satisfaction.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You came bursting into your room as you cried, slipping off your heels and taking the accessories out of your hair and throwing them onto the vanity followed by your earrings and necklace. You ripped the corsage off your wrist and threw it into the trash can beside you. You studied yourself in the mirror, hating yourself for deciding to wear a gown only to surprise the one you thought loved you most only for them to humiliate you and look like a fool. You went and sat down on your bed as you cried into your hands. James came into the dorm in a panic causing you to jump, “Love, I can explain!” You furrowed your eyebrows in anger while looking at him in disgust, “no! I don’t want to hear it, James!”

“No, no, no, really darling! It wasn’t what it looked-“ you got up from the bed, “Oh yeah? Cause it looked like my boyfriend was kissing his ex girlfriend by the punch table!”

“Well yes but-“

“Do you still have feelings for her, James?” You yelled as you walked closer, “were you only using me to get back at her? Did you even love me?!” He was stuttering as he tried to answer every question you threw at him, “what? No! Of course I do!” He tried but you continued to yell at him, causing him to get angry and the screaming match began. It never ever got this bad before. If the dance wasn’t still going on, everyone would for sure be able to hear every insulting and harsh words you were throwing at each other. There were hot tears streaming down your faces as you continued. But as bad as it was, and as much as you wanted to, neither of you had the willpower to officially call the relationship off. You loved each other too much to do so and you both knew that.

You took the flowers he gave you earlier off your desk and harshly shoved them into his chest, “Get out! I don’t want you here! Leave!” You pushed him out the door and slammed it in his face. You took a deep breath and turned around, and started towards your bed. You didn’t know what to think or how to feel. You knew what he was saying made sense and knew he loved you far too much to ever do something to hurt you. But you don’t know why you kept going at him.

You sat down and stared down at the floor, your mind so lost in deep thought that you didn’t even realize you had changed out of your dress and into your pyjamas. You looked down at the shirt you’d just finished putting on and sighed, it was his shirt. You shut your lamp off and lied down on your bed and stared up at the ceiling as the thoughts in your head continued to flow. Why was he with Aria in the first place for that to happen? He shouldn’t have let that happen. But after a while you felt really bad for what you had said to him and the names you called him. But was he mad at you now too? You heard something that was slid under the crack of your door, you sat up and looked at the little piece of paper that was on the floor. You turned your lamp back on and slowly walked over and picked it up. You opened the paper, “My Beautiful Darling Y/n, no matter how much we fight, the love I have for you will never fade. You will never be unloved by me for you are far too well tangled in my soul. The only feeling stronger than my love for you is the ache that comes with missing you. I’m so very sorry I let this happen, My Love.” You wiped a tear from your cheek as you finished reading. You set the note down on your nightstand and lied back down on your bed.

You tried to fall asleep but you just couldn’t. You missed the feeling of being secured and safe in his arms while he whispered sweet nothings as you drifted off to sleep. Your bed felt cold. Lonely.

After a few more minutes of attempting to force yourself to sleep, you got up and crept out of your room and down the stairs and proceeded down another long hallway before stopping in front of an all too familiar door. You stared at it, contemplating whether or not it was a good idea. But before you could make a decision, you were already making your way inside the dark room. You quietly walked towards the bed, softly and carefully getting under the covers making sure not to wake him. The warmth and familiarity of his body heat made you feel at ease. You looked over at his sleeping figure who was facing towards you and traced his features with your eyes, admiring everything about him and couldn’t help but smile. You really did love this boy with all your heart.

You turned away from him and sighed before closing your eyes to sleep, but just as you were drifting off, you felt an arm snake around your figure, pulling you close. You smiled and melted into his body as you felt the warmth of him engulf your backside, placing your hand on top of his that was placed above your stomach under your shirt. Well, his shirt. He pulled you closer and you felt him softly stroking your hair. Though it has only been a few hours since you’ve felt his touch, it felt like forever. You turned in his arms to face him and wrapped your arms around him scrunching the fabric of his shirt tightly in your hands while burying your face deep into his chest, he had managed to somehow pull you closer though it was physically impossible already.

“I’m sorry.” He heard your soft voice cry, muffled from being buried in his chest. He shook his head and stroked your head, “shh, no, no, no. Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong, my love.” You let out a quiet sob which was terribly agonizing for him to hear. He looked down and placed his hand on your cheek, bringing your gaze up to his. You looked into his eyes with a pitiful gaze, he saw how broken you looked. The moonlight that seeped in through the window above his bed glistening off your tearful eyes. “Don’t cry, love..” he tried but you rambled on, spilling everything your heart was feeling at that moment causing the pieces of his already broken heart shatter into a million more pieces. He stared at you not knowing what to say after you were done, only pulling you into a deep kiss, more passionate than ever letting his body do the talking without saying any words, pulling your waist close to his. He left sloppy kisses down to your neck, lightly gracing the sensitive skin with his teeth making you gasp in pleasure and gently pull at his hair before he continued to leave his mark with a smile while telling you how beautiful you were and how much he loved you.

This continued until both your neck and chest were covered with love bites. He trailed kisses back up and kissed you once more. He broke the kiss, breathing heavily while looking into your lustful, heavy lidded eyes that were threatening to shut and noticed as your breathing slowed. He pulled you back in and you cuddled back into his chest, “I love you.” You whispered, trailing off as you began to fall into a deep, well needed slumber.

“I love you too, Darling.” He whispered, leaving a delicate kiss on your forehead and rested his head on yours as you both drifted off to sleep.

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saerins · 2 years ago

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─── 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐑

+ itoshi rin x f!reader | wc 1.6k | content: fluff, friends to lovers, college au, slightly suggestive at the end, mutual pining ?

note: hmmm okay rin may be doing things to me @_@ i rarely write for him so forgive me if this is ass but !!! ily rin <3

summary: you and rin are both oblivious to each other’s feelings. but maybe one push is all you need.

it doesn’t make sense why he’s so nervous. you’re still you and he’s still him and nothing’s changed except for the acquisition of some personal information. coming from blunt bangs too, nonetheless.

two weeks ago.

“hey, y/n-chan, you’re single right?” bachira asked, casually as he could while the both of you were on the same train back home.

you were startled, but still shook your head all the same. bachira and rin were teammates, so naturally you two knew of each other, but you couldn’t remember the last time you ever spoke to him. you only remembered that rin liked calling him blunt bangs. and then he started getting a little sulky after you called bachira’s hair cute.

“just wondering, have you ever thought of getting together with rin-chan?”

bachira had been swaying along with the train, his hands gripped firmly on the hanging handles. that wasn’t what you were fixated on though, because his question threw you off, the heat shooting to your cheeks the moment you processed it.

“w-what do you mean?”

you had been flustered, but bachira remained oblivious as ever. (lucky for you.) he tilted his face upwards, staring at the train ceiling, carefully picking his words.

“well, you and rin-chan spend a lot of time together, just wondering if you both ever tried anything.”

it came off sounding a lot more suggestive than anything, but knowing bachira, you doubted he meant anything other than the simple fact of considering getting together.

and it wasn’t like you didn’t. because of course you did. you couldn’t spend so much time with someone like rin and not feel anything.

you’d known rin since freshman year, since you both kept to yourselves at this one party, bumping into each other at the corner of the room, awkwardly shuffling your feet and trying to ignore the other as much as you could.

you caved first; your want for a friend in that party overtook your shyness, and luckily for you, rin entertained you that night. he took you up on your offer to get out of there, away from the loud bass and drunk teenagers and onto a more quiet destination—the supper spot near your dorms.

since then, you’d found a lot of common ground and somehow, you just seeped into rin’s life. just like that. you couldn’t say anything for him, but you’d thought he was attractive since the first moment you laid eyes on him. plus, rin was such a hot topic on campus, you’d just sort of eliminated the possibilities of being together with him entirely.

he was out of your league, wasn’t he?

you were happy enough just to be his friend. until bachira asked that question. until you realised that hey, maybe you should explore it. maybe you should tell someone about it. anyone.

so you nodded your head, embarrassed as you may have been.

“don’t tell him, okay?” you warned bachira.

bachira grinned ear to ear. “it’s safe with me!”

evidently, it wasn’t, rin thinks now—looking at bachira and isagi egging him on. after bachira acquired said information, he had ran straight to rin’s dorm and spilled the beans.

rin pulls up a mental reminder: do not ever share secrets with bachira under any circumstances. ever.

which is also why, after multiple instances of persuasion and letting slip that maybe he’s into you too, rin is keeping bachira under close scrutiny. he’s not even sure whether you’ll show up tonight, at the soccer team’s victory party. from past experiences, you do.

“you should tell her how you feel,” bachira says again, eliciting a sigh out of rin.

“mind your own business, blunt bangs,” rin murmurs, drinking his diet coke.

isagi nudges him lightly. “she’s pretty in-demand right? i heard that some other guys from our team has their eyes on her too.”

it manages to perk rin’s ears, and it’s too late for him to realise it’s all a ploy, because isagi’s snickering the moment rin opens his mouth, earning a slap on the back of his head.

“fuck off with that already.”

“yeah yeah, you gotta strike while the iron’s hot,” bachira chimes in, only further agitating rin. “actions maketh the man or whatever.”

“don’t just throw around every phrase you learned,” he retorts. rin’s fists are clenched at his side, remembering why he used to go to these alone. gotta be better than having to listen to these two idiots.

then, a familiar giggle sounds from behind him, and rin freezes up almost immediately (to the amusement of his two friends). “what am i missing out on here?”

bachira opens up his mouth but isagi claps his hand over him almost instantaneously. for once, rin’s thankful that at least one of them has more tact than the other. you can only watch on with confusion as isagi drags bachira away, citing some lame excuse about how they had to check on the other guests.

they’re not even the hosts.

“your friends are acting weird, rin,” you comment, and rin wholeheartedly agrees. for some reason, he can’t help but notice you more after what bachira revealed to him.

“they’re always weird.”

his eyes survey your body, appreciating how the dress flows so beautifully, how your hair’s done up just perfectly. you’re so pretty too, why didn’t he ever tell you that? probably because he didn’t want you thinking he was some sort of freak. you probably have suitors for days—way out of his league.

“anyway, congratulations on winning the tournament, mvp,” you say teasingly, winking, your heart skipping beats when you catch the slight crimson falling on his cheeks as he looks away.

for some reason, being able to see rin like this, where everyone else only gets to see the more stoic side of him makes you feel special. it may be a case of delusion, but you don’t mind.

you expect some sort of quip, something like how their win was expected and not something worth congratulating. but instead, through his red ears and awkward eye contact, he tells you a curt thanks before he goes back to excessively sipping his diet coke.

“did something happen?” you ask, nearly making rin choke on air, he realises, because he’s gulped down his entire drink.

“no,” he answers, a little too harshly, before he reigns himself in. rin doesn’t really want to be the one to broach the subject, but he really doesn’t want to risk going home tonight without knowing for sure how you feel.

screw bachira’s intel—rin wants to hear it from your own lips, wants to be there to see and hear you confess.

“bachira told me about it.” rin feels you stiffen up beside him this time. but you don’t say a word. that’s fine though. he started it, he may as well see this through. “do you- still feel that way?”

thankfully, you don’t like to torture him, automatically knowing what he’s referring to, probably already calculated in your head the probability that bachira would’ve ratted you out. then, does that mean you wanted to be found out?

“i- i mean i- um, yeah, yeah i do.” you’re fiddling with your fingers, looking to the side, afraid to meet his eye. you and rin are close as ever, but that makes this all the more awkward. you’ve never really been the type of people to talk about feelings. at least, not until now.

you’re not sure what rin will say or do, and you can hear your heart drumming loud against your chest, beating against your ear.

“i feel the same,” rin blurts out, somehow afraid that if he didn’t, you’d assume otherwise.

his words weigh heavy on your chest before lifting the weight off of it all at the same time. you’re relieved, more than, that he feels the same, that you’re hearing it from his own mouth. but now the both of you are just standing there staring at each other, wondering how on earth you should continue this.

and you do rin a favor, paying him back for starting the conversation at all, by standing on your tiptoes and pulling his collar in, pressing a kiss against his lips, tasting the diet coke lingering on his tongue. by the way his arms wrap around you, by now his kiss gets even deeper by the second, you can tell that you aren’t the only one that’s been dreaming of this.

“ah, rin finally got some balls and confessed huh?”

bachira’s all too familiar voice breaks the moment, although the sound of your laugh helps to ease rin’s disappointment. he’ll get more moments of this, more of you—soon. he doesn’t even have the mood to snap at bachira, only occupied with thoughts of what he wants to do with you.

“see, what’d i tell you, y/n-chan? he likes you too, doesn’t he?”

rin’s face turns a bright red at the realisation. “he told you?” he asks.

you nod, grinning sheepishly. “i read his text just before i got here.” you pull out your phone, showing him the evidence.

[20:48] bachira: y/n!! big news!!!

[20:48] bachira: rin said he likes you too, get over here alr!!!

rin blinks, the timing lining up with exactly when rin expressed that he has been interested in you all this time.

“i’m gonna fucking kill you,” rin deadpans at bachira, isagi already disappearing elsewhere, not wanting to be part of this.

bachira thinks he’s lucky when you tilt rin’s face towards you, kissing him again, distracting him from his ire. he takes this chance to slip away, leaving you two lovebirds alone.

“would you rather deal with him or come home with me, mr itoshi?”

it takes everything in rin not to just sweep you up and take you right here in this room. he mirrors your smirk, a casual hunger burning beneath his teal eyes.

“you, always you.”

#did not proof this but we roll with it …#bllk x reader #rin x reader #itoshi rin x reader #blue lock x reader #rin x you #rin x y/n #rin fluff #bllk x you #bllk x y/n #bllk fluff #blue lock x you #blue lock x y/n #blue lock fluff #rin itoshi x reader #rin itoshi x you #rin itoshi x y/n #rin itoshi fluff #૪ aeri’s fics !

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apclyptc · 1 year ago

Note

oh my ur writing is so good 😭 i was wondering if you could write something where chris is on tour and since he’s been away he’s been needy so like hes texting the reader saying how he’s horny and needs her, so the reader calls chris and they end up having phone sex and chris is like whimpering and unable to keep quiet.. sub chris please 🙏

foreword: aaaaahhhh i love this idea, and thank u! as for sub chris…. im not sure if i can fully capture that since i cant imagine it but i shall give you desperate chris!

enjoy ☺️

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

your boyfriend, chris, was steadily becoming one of the most famous influencers and with that came the task of touring the states.

he’d already been on tour with his brothers once before, but this time he’d gained millions more supporters.

he was midway through his travels, briefly stopping for a couple days from charlotte to nashville. you hadn’t seen each other in a couple of weeks, and you were starting to miss him.

you missed the way he made you laugh, always including you in his busy schedule, letting you bond with his brothers.

more importantly you missed his hands on you, gliding over your waist, his lips softly kissing the shell of your ear, down to your jaw, your neck, and then finally your lips.

you didn’t realise how long this month without him would feel like.

neither did he, which was why your phone buzzed at the side of your bed. his bed, which you were sleeping in for the next couple of days. his parents treated you like their own, so you graciously used the key they made for you to infiltrate your boyfriend’s room.

you picked up your phone, the screen lighting up your face as you read the message chris had sent you

chris: i miss you

you: i miss you too

i was just thinking about you

chris: yeah?

bet you were thinking something dirty

he knew you so well.

you: no…

i’m just in your bed

i hope you don’t mind, i got cold

*image attached*

chris: damn

so you raided the hoodies already baby?

you: i couldn’t miss the opportunity

chris: you know i love it when you wear my shit

you: of course

can’t you cancel your tour and hurry back to me

chris: if i could i would be home already

you need me that bad huh?

you: oh? but who texted first?

chris: you got me there

i just wanna see your fine ass

you: how bad

chris: bad

hard just thinking about it

wish you were here to help me out baby

you immediately pressed the facetime icon at the top of the screen, watching the phone ring.

after three rings, your boyfriends face appeared.

“hey ma.” chris’ voice cut through the speaker, instantly making you feel better. you rarely had time to speak to him on the phone since he was so busy with the tour.

“ew chris. stop saying ma when i’m in the room.” nick could be heard from behind. you giggled. it always made you laugh when nick expressed a clear dislike for PDA.

“hi nick, how’s tour?” you spoke. chris turned the camera to his brother.

“it’s good! i can’t wait to get off this tour bus though, i hate taking a shit in public bathrooms.” he complained, causing you to laugh at his outwardness.

“should i pass the phone to nick since you wanna speak to him so much?” chris taunted, angling the camera back to himself.

“don’t be jealous of your brother, chris. how is my handsome boyfriend doing?” you smiled at him.

“bored. come to nashville.” he replied.

you shook your head, “you know i can’t.” you had to stay home to work on your own projects. unbeknownst to chris though, you had already arranged with nick and matt to surprise him at the last show of the tour.

“hey y/n. bro do you want anything from target?” matt popped his head into the view of the camera to say hello, and you waved.

“obviously you know what drink i want. get me something sour as well. thanks bro.” he answered matt, then turned his attention back to you.

chris waited until he heard his brothers leave and slam the door of the tour bus.

“i love that pretty face.” he smirked at you.

even over the phone, chris had a way of making your cheeks tint a light shade of red.

“i wish you were here in bed with me.” you spoke quietly, even though no one was home.

“i know, baby. when i get home i’m gonna make you forget i was ever gone.” chris swapped the phone over to his other hand, while he snaked his free hand under his sweatpants.

“how are you gonna do that?” you feigned innocence, knowing exactly what he was hinting at.

“i’m gonna pick you up, throw you into my bed and fill up that throat real good.” chris palmed himself through his underwear, feeling his dick harden.

you felt that twang in your stomach that appears whenever you hear his filthy words.

you took it upon yourself to set your phone down on the bedside table and slip your hands under your panties.

“is that what you want? you want me to suck your dick, baby?” you asked him, while you lazily played with your clit.

chris groaned, not used to you talking like this to him, “yeah, gonna make you swallow all of my cum. god, i want to feel that pussy round me.”

chris, by now, had pulled out his dick, moving his hand up and down and squeezing slightly at the base. he wished it was your tight cunt squeezing around him.

meanwhile, the lazy strokes on your clit had turned into desperate circles, wishing it was his thick, long fingers playing with you. you used the slick building up to coat your fingers, then pushed them inside yourself.

“are you touching yourself, y/n? fucking yourself on your fingers pretending it’s me?” he moaned softly, his hand moving faster.

“yes… want you inside me.” you whined, giving him the vocal stimulation he needed.

chris angled the phone down to his throbbing cock, willing you to watch as he masturbated.

“you see this, baby? ‘s all for you, fuck.” chris let out a quiet whimper, imagining you were next to him right now, your small hands pumping him instead of his own.

you watched his face contort in pleasure, his head falling back as he stroked faster.

“take off my hoodie, let me those tits.” he demanded, though he was in no position to bark orders as he rutted into his hand desperately.

you paused the motion of your fingers inside of you to quickly discard his hoodie and your shirt, revealing your tits to the screen.

“fuck… touch ‘em for me, i wanna see you touch yourself.” he whined at an unfamiliar pitch.

you grabbed your own boob in your hand, kneading it just like he would as you continued thrusting your fingers in and out of your aching pussy.

it was all too much, and yet not enough, without him helping you.

but even so, you felt the knot twist.

“i know that pretty face. you gonna cum?” he asked.

“yes! oh fuck, chris. fuck, want to cum on your face, baby.” you babbled, half incomprehensible.

your words drove chris into madness, moaning and whimpering as his thumb massaged his weeping tip.

“fuck, fuck, fuck. wanna feel that pussy around me, gonna fuck you good, shit, i’m–“ his own orgasm cut his words short, bursting out of his cock, coating his hands. a stray droplet landed on his stomach.

the sight of your boyfriend panting and moaning from his high prompted you to cream all over your fingers. your mouth dropped open as you continued to finger yourself through it, until your adrenaline finally depleted.

both of you took a second to catch your breath.

“i need to clean this mess up before my brothers get back.” chris tucked his softening dick back into his underwear and grabbed a hand towel next to him.

“i love you, chris.” you spoke after he was done cleaning himself up.

“i love you too. i can’t wait to see you after tour is over.” he smiled at you.

“that was the worst target ever.” nick burst through the door of the bus, scaring chris.

“jesus, nick! you scared the shit out of me.” chris clutched his chest and you laughed, quickly throwing your hoodie back on.

“wait why the fuck are you sweating?” matt asked, following his brother inside.

“chris was showing me some top secret basketball moves he’s been working on.” you interjected as you watched chris’ eyes widen at the question.

how embarrassing it would have been if they’d caught you.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

a/n: i hope that was what you wanted!! part two of reader surprising chris at the last show? lmk your thoughts :p

#chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo #the sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo oneshot #chris sturniolo smut

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glossdebut · 8 days ago

Text

PRICE OF FAME | MYG ★ CH. 2 TEASER

✧ PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader

✧ SUMMARY: You were about ready to give up, your career nowhere near what you dreamed it’d be when you started at eighteen, bright-eyed and naive. Reality for you these past few years has consisted of pouting at a camera, ignoring whispers of your name at company events, and ensuring that the stupid, tiny designer purses they keep forcing on you can at least carry a flask. But now, you’re helping a friend in need. For the first time in a long time, it feels like you’re doing something worthwhile with your life. Too bad Min Yoongi, the newest thorn in your side, seems insistent on stopping you. 『 series masterlist 』

✧ TEASER WARNINGS: none!

✧ AUTHOR'S NOTE: ask and you shall receive! i still don't have a set drop date for this chapter, but i wanted to post this short teaser for y'all anyway since you've been waiting so patiently. i am so thankful for all of the love i'm getting for this series already!!! chapter one is almost at 500 notes which is SO insane. i get so stupidly giddy every time i receive a reply, reblog, or an ask about this series! feedback and interaction keep me writing and i am so looking forward to what all of you think of this teaser. reminder that you can track the tag 'glossdebut updates' to stay updated on drop dates/word counts/etc.!

P.S. just like with all of my teasers, wording is subject to change when the chapter actually comes out <3

✧ TEASER WORDCOUNT: 481 words

✧ STATUS: ongoing

Yoongi hasn’t touched a cigarette since he was twenty one years old.

He picked up the nasty habit at sixteen, when one of his friends doled out African Ice Jacks amongst the group, bragging that his hyung had bought the pack for him. As soon as the lighter was flicked on and the bittersweet taste of bubblegum and tobacco filled Yoongi’s lungs, he was hooked.

It was stupidly easy to get his hands on cigarettes before he was of legal age, even when his friend’s hyung couldn’t supply them for whatever reason. All of the adults around him smoked, including his parents.

It felt as though cigarettes were an extension of his hand, felt wrong when he didn’t have the option to light one up. During school hours, Yoongi’s fingers would twitch on his desk as he waited for his last class to end.

He was a fucking anxious, wound-up kid. Smoking was the only thing that helped, sometimes. If he had a shit day, at least he could have a cigarette.

When the band got signed, though, things changed. Despite the fact that the majority of the population in Korea smoked, celebrities were vilified for it in the media. For whatever fucking reason. Yoongi didn’t care much what the media had to say about him, but he reasoned that it would be pretty stupid to let his dream die over Ice Jacks. So he quit.

It was hard at first, but it’s been five years now. After so much time, it’s rare that cigarettes even cross his mind, even when others smoke around him.

Sitting across the table from you now, though, Yoongi’s fingers twitch just like they had when he was in grade school staring at a clock.

He and the band started frequenting Yoojung Sikdang long before there was any real hope for fame. It was their chosen spot after every practice. The ajumma who owns it knows their names, remembers their orders by heart. Over the years, the only part of the restaurant that’s changed is their autographed photos on the wall. They’ve celebrated every single milestone here, big or small, just the five of them. Alone.

Wrapping up their first world tour should be no different. It’s their biggest milestone yet, and all Yoongi wanted was to eat ssambap with his best friends. Remind himself that none of the fame matters as long as they still have this.

But here you are. Of course. Encroaching on everything Yoongi’s built, everything he holds dear to his heart.

The only time it’s ever been more than the five of them here was the night they signed their contract, accompanied by two label executives. Even if you’re allegedly riding Jeongguk’s dick, no way are you that fucking important.

Yoongi would laugh if he wasn’t so pissed off. You are such a fucking pest. He just can’t shake you off.

✧ TAGLIST: @jajabro @pitchblack0309 @sugar-snap @ot72025 @ktownshizzle

@futuristicenemychaos @tea4sykes @sugainmybowl @namjoonsbuspass @wobblewobble822

@yoongiphoria @ohnothisnameisalreadytaken @this-most-assuredly-counts @sugafun @binniesbabe

@1800lxcifrrr @whoa-jo @amarawayne @kimsaerom @bangtangsworld @angellekookie

@jalexad @tarahardcore @valhallawhispers @chimmisbae @notsevenwithyou

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chaiifluuf · 7 months ago

Text

That's that me espresso! — c. nakahara

synopsis. chuuya struggles to fall asleep again after thinking about you and his unexpected dreams

content. fem!reader, fluff, suggestive in one part, chuuya is lovesick and he doesn’t know it <3

notes. i don’t know if i got his character right.. i tried my best tho ! and yes this is inspired by sabrina carpenter’s song espresso hehe (*´꒳`*)

chuuya doesn’t dream.

or well he didn’t use to because tonight was the first time he had a dream in a really long time.

the fact it wasn’t a nightmare shocked him even further and out of all things he could’ve dreamed about, it was about you. why you? he isn’t sure himself. chuuya let out a silent sigh as he rubbed his face, trying to recall everything he saw because a part of him is still in disbelief that he had an actual dream.

the first thing he remembers is you wearing a summer dress while walking at the shore of a beach. the gentle waves crashing into your bare feet as you carried your flip flops in your hand. then you turned around and your face was beaming. chuuya swore you had the happiest smile he had ever seen on you. something seems to catch your attention when you look at him.

“chuuya, your hair is in your face!” you tell him with a light giggle. as soon as you mention that, he notices how his hair strands start to obscure his sight as the wind blows from behind him. you make your way towards him as if an idea popped into your mind. “wait, stay still,” you say and swiftly move behind him while chuuya couldn’t help but blink in confusion. “what?”

you don’t say anything in return but it doesn’t take him long before he realises what you’re doing as he can feel your fingers gather his hair into one place. you were making a ponytail for him.

“there! now it won’t be bothering you,” you say once you are done, looking at him in satisfaction and glee. chuuya touches his head for a moment, not used to having it like that. it indeed felt nicer. he thanked you before the two of you start walking again.

“no problem. you look really good with a ponytail too…” you mumble the last part and chuuya almost misses it. he glances at you, about to say something and he’ll never know what because that was the moment he woke up.

chuuya believes there was probably more going on in the dream but this is as far as he remembers. he casts a look to the side, scanning over the clock that reads 2:56 am. there is more than enough time to get his much needed sleep. because it is a rare occurrence for him to not be exhausted from a usual workday, he’ll take any bit of rest he can get.

with that in mind, chuuya shifts his body to the other side and closes his eyes, a soft exhale leaving his lips. it was just a silly dream and he will forget it soon enough anyway. although he still doesn’t quite understand why you were there. you were one of the closest people to him, he’ll admit that. you knew him better than most people and he has lost count at how many times you have made his day so much better. the two of you were good friends and that’s it. yeah, this is fine.

except it isn’t.

falling asleep turns out to be a much more difficult task than he anticipated. he isn’t even that tired anymore which did not help. chuuya’s mind is still stuck on his damned dream. he can’t help but picture again your radiant smile, how your hair blew in the wind, the way you stared at him and that pretty dress… he quickly shaked his head to snap out of it. he can’t believe himself. chuuya decides to get up and find something to distract himself since he couldn’t sleep now anyway.

he wished that would’ve been the one and only time he dreamed of you. this was the third time in the week that he hasn’t slept well. all of them had you in it and at this point chuuya thinks something is wrong with him. how does anyone dream about the same person so many times in such a short time?

chuuya groans into his pillow as he suspects yet another badly slept night. of course you were on his mind once more. he is glad that these aren’t nightmares but at the same time he doesn’t know how to feel about these dreams either. he’s also shocked by just how vividly he remembers all of them.

in the second dream, chuuya was at a restaurant with you. if he’s going to be honest then it felt like a date. the dimmed lights, the romantic atmosphere, a lit up candle placed on the middle of the table and two glasses filled halfway with red wine. he still remembers the simple yet elegant carmine dress you were wearing. your gaze was filled with so much warmth and adoration that he felt his heart falter. then you laughed at something he said and god your laughter seemed sweeter than the desserts the two of you were having.

the entire time his eyes were stuck on you as if you were the most breathtaking person he had ever come across. and you were. while the conversation was hazy to him, the scene of you intertwining your fingers with his was still clear in his mind. your rosy cheeks afterwards made you look even prettier. thinking about it alone made chuuya’s heart rate fasten.

the third dream however, the one he had tonight, was a different story. because with each time these dreams seem to get bolder and chuuya doesn’t know how to handle it.

you were pushed against the bed with him hovering over you. he was kissing you and they weren’t some kind of gentle kisses either. more like they were filled with desire, need and many other strong emotions he couldn’t pinpoint. he pulled away for a moment, his lips still brushing against yours. your hair had gotten rather messy, your lipstick was smeared and it was obvious that you were breathless as he could feel your breath on his skin.

“chuuya, please…” he couldn’t fight back the shiver that went down his spine when he heard your pleading voice. your arms were wrapped around his neck as you held him close. his lips slowly trail down from your lips and he can’t help but start sensually kissing your neck. chuuya relished the soft noises that left your lips.

“want you s’bad,” you murmured to his ear and chuuya swears his heart skipped a beat. were you even aware of the effect you had on him? “i’m right here, doll.” his tone was low and husky as one of his hands sneaked below your shirt, lifting it up as he traced your waist. he didn’t miss the subtle tremble of your body when his bare hand came in touch with your abdomen. god your skin was so soft and your flushed face was the most adorable sight. he grinned before going for your lips again and then—

chuuya can feel his face heat up as he realised what he was thinking. he buried his face into the pillow once again because that was just a little too intimate. and goddamn it, he feels like a schoolgirl who just talked to her crush for the first time.

why the fuck is this happening to him?

he hasn’t seen you in a while since both of you were busy with your missions lately. you did text him though, and even if he always didn’t have the time to respond, you liked talking to him about your day as well as your frustrations at times. chuuya didn’t mind and when he had a chance would type you back. with a lot of things going on, you and him were still in touch. so are his dreams supposed to be some kind of sign to see you again?

if only you knew how much you have driven him insane. he needs to do something, anything to get these dreams out of his head. a night with actually good rest does sound nice right now. however he won’t get that, not tonight at least. suddenly chuuya gets an idea. a stupid idea perhaps, but he believes he will only continue to suffer if he won’t do anything about it. he grabs his phone from the bedside table and opens the messages app.

Me 4:03 am

you up?

chuuya sighs, there is no going back now. he hopes you’re asleep but a small part of him wishes you would respond because he has no idea what to do at this point. five minutes later, he hears his phone vibrate.

Y/n 4:08 am

mhm, something wrong?

his eyes slightly widen in surprise. so you were awake. for a moment he thinks what to text back.

Me 4:09 am

not really, just can’t sleep

Y/n 4:09 am

what a coincidence haha

now that i think about it i still haven’t seen your motorcycle that you promised to show me one day

maybe wanna meet up? ^ ^

chuuya’s mind pauses because this might be exactly what he needs — to see you again. without thinking too much he starts typing.

Me 4:10 am

sure

i’ll come and pick you up

Y/n 4:11 am

YAYY

i’ll see you then!!

he can’t help but smile a little. a genuine smile that he hasn’t had in a while. he quickly changed his clothes, locked his apartment and began making his way to the garage.

he might never admit it but even with you in his dreams, he still missed you. the real you.

fun fact: initially, i had put a winky face after the “i’ll come and pick you up” text but then decided against it bc i’m still not sure if he would do that LMAO

#𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅ maeve writes . 🖋️#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x you #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #chuuya x you #chuuya nakahara x reader #chuuya x reader #chuuya x y/n #chuuya x fem!reader #chuuya fluff

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bouncybongfairy · 8 months ago

Text

Simon Says

Ghost!Keegan!Soap x Fem Reader Smut

Summary: After coming back from the bar and continuing the last mission's success at the safe house. Price comes out, complaining about the noise, so you guys move it to your room. A foul game of Simon Says takes place.

Word Count: 1.0k+

Ref Account: @kaionyx

TW: Group Smut & Facial, Male Receiving Head, Rough Smut.

Not Proof Read

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

It was late and Ghost, Soap, Keegan and yourself were hanging out in the living room of the safe house. The current mission you were working on just wrapped up and everyone was celebrating with drinks and laughter; a rare sight within task force 141. Everyone else had gone to bed after coming home from the bar. They had their fill of fun but you guys were just getting started. Pouring shots of cheap vodka and smoking while listening to music. Price came out, complaining about the smell and noise, moving to your room to avoid any more confrontations. You were nervous to have all three of them in your room. They were looking around at all your stuff, posters, stuffed animals, and of course the stereo. You connected your phone and started playing BabyMetal, Keegan picked up a picture from your desk.

“Is this you?” he asked, holding a picture of you in freshman year of college. It was you and a good friend, you grew up in Jersey which meant Snooki pretty much was your fashion icon all of college.

“Is that a joint?” Ghost asked, laughing at your duck lips and hair extensions.

“Yeah it was quite the era. Look, I was crying because my sister and I got into a huge fight over who’s turn it was for the Juicy Couture bag. You can see where my spray tan ran down my neck” you laugh reminiscing on simpler times.

Ghost was sitting on your office chair, legs spread and leaning over to reach the cigarette you were sharing. Keegan and Soap were lounge on your bed; you were curled up on a beanie bag. You couldn’t remember who suggested it but you guys started playing drinking games. Things like fuck the dealer and flip cup. You were getting pretty tipsy, giggling randomly and your body warming up. The boys were having a conversation among themselves while you lined up the shot glasses and grabbed the bottle.

“Are you sure you can handle another drink?” Soap asked.

“Are you asking me or yourself?” you asked, handing the liquor out.

After some more small talk, you excused yourself to change. Normally your pajamas are pretty revealing so you wear a sweatshirt and cotton shorts. Long socks because it was always freezing in your room. Once you started getting dressed you noticed how drunk you actually were. Tripping slightly while trying to get your shorts on Coming out and watching as all their eyes fall onto you. Clearly looking you up and down, at first you wanted to be like ‘oh my god don’t look at me like that’ but also you did so… why lie? You sat back on the bean bag as Keegan began to speak.

“We should play another game,” he said.

“What about Simon Says?” Ghost says.

“Isn’t that your name?” you drunkenly giggle.

“Yeah, so just know when I say something you have to take it seriously,” he said.

After that comment that vibe in the room felt different after that. All of them went from sitting back and lounging to sitting forwards. Soap and Ghost were sitting on the bed, Keegan was on the office chair. You beanbag was on the floor so they were all looking down on you.

“Simon says: sit on my lap,” he says, leaning back slightly like he was making room. All their breathing became harder, you rolled your eyes at the reaction.

“What is this middle school? Out of all the things you could have asked?” you laugh, walking over and sitting on his thighs without hesitation. Making the point that it wasn’t a very daunting task.

“Okay hot shot, Simon says: to read smut out loud,” Soap said, crossing his arms.

“I don’t read-'' you started but was interrupted.

“Yes you do,” they all said in unison, “you need to invest in a privacy screen,” Keegan said, you could tell all three of them were smirking under their masks.

“Fine.” you grab your phone and look through your tumblr.

If they wanted to show, you were going to go full out. Finding a Captain America smut about hooking up in the barracks. It was obvious that they were wanting you to be flustered and flushed but it was doing the opposite. They were blushing and squirming around like there was no way to get comfortable. As you continued to read, Simon was getting hard. This was throwing you off your game a bit, now beginning to stumble over your words. Ghost noticed this and leaned back in his chair more, allowing him to press his member against your ass.

You started rocking your hips every now and then. Enjoying hearing his almost silent groans and growls. His hands were starting to wander, running up and down your thighs. You looked over at the other guys and they were practically drooling. Looking at you like a can of beer they waited all day to crack open. Soap got up first and Keegan followed, your heart began to race. He slowly approached you and cupped your face in his hands. Rubbing your cheeks with his calloused thumbs. Keegan was on the side of him, brushing the hair out of your face.

“Such a pretty little thing right?” Soap asked Keegan. This made you shiver, goosebumps prickled along your skin. Your phone dropping to the floor, Ghost kicked it away.

“Fuck yeah, just begging to be ruined,” he said, grabbing your shirt and pulling it off your body. Leaving your chest completely exposed. Keegan reached down and pinched one of your nipples, pulling and twisting. You gasp and try leaning back but Ghost isn't letting you go anywhere.

“Where do you think you’re running off to?” Ghost asked, grabbing your elbows.

Soap grabbed the other and Ghost held you in place as they groped and played with your chest. The more you squirmed the harder Ghost became, pre-cum starting to bleed through his pants. Your face was flushed and sweat was beading on your forehead. Keegan used his other hand and parted your lips with his thumb. Eventually pushing it into your mouth; pressing your tongue down and feeling around your mouth. You wrapped your lips around his thumb looking up and shifting your eyes between the two of them. Pulling his thumb out and spreading your saliva all over your lips. Ghost stood you up slightly so he could free his dick that was straining against his pants. Pulling your shorts to the side and lining you up with his tip; grabbing your hips guiding you down on his member. He groaned and let his chin fall on top of your head. Your eyes rolled back and a loud gasp fell from your lips. Moaning and panting while you got used to how big he was.

“Why do you get her?” Keegan asked.

“Use her mouth i’m fucking busy,” he growled, trying his best not to buck into you.

The fact that he was talking about you like an objection shouldn’t have made your stomach flip the way it did. Soap and Keegan pulled their dicks out and began stroking themselves. Looking down, admiring your body, you started bouncing. The wet squelching sounds every time you sink down on his length. Your eyebrows furrowed and mouth hanging open, not caring about the droll falling from your bottom lip. Keegan grabbed two fistfuls of your hair and brought your lips to his cock. Taking his tip into your mouth and flicking your tongue on his head. He moaned and started pushing himself further into your mouth. Soap rested his length on your cheek, insinuating he wanted in on the fun. You grabbed his shaft and started jerking him off. Ghost was getting less gentle with you, starting to pound into you with more aggression. His nails were digging into the skin on your hip, tightening around him when his head kissed your cervix. Whimpering around Keegan cock, spit and pre-cum running down your torso. In so much pleasure, you were neglecting Soap. Especially as you began cumming around his cock, your walls pulsating around his member as you nearly screamed in pleasure.

“Fuck dude, my turn,” Soap said, pushing Keegan to where he was just standing.

After being touched-starved for so long, he showed no mercy on your throat. Fucking into your mouth at an animalistic pace. Causing you to gag around his length, mascara stained tears running down your face. Keegan was enjoying the sight, watching your bounce on Ghost while having your throat obliterated. Like a personal porn star made just for them. Ghost was getting close to his orgasm, trying hard to hold himself back. Biting onto your shoulder, to muffle the sounds and delay his climax. Soap came early, cum was spilling out the sides of your mouth, only adding to the wet fucking noise that already filled the room. Ghost began cumming, shooting thick ropes deep into your stomach. Holding you down as hard as he could, rocking your hips as you milked him. Keegan came on your face, cumming on one of your lashes. Forcing you to keep it closed, which hummored the two of them. You lean back against Ghost’s chest, practically dead from how fucked out you were. You don't remember much the next morning, but thought it was nice of them to clean you up and tuck you into bed. The walk of shame to the bathroom while having a hangover and cum dripping down your thigh wasn’t how you wanted to start your morning but oh well.

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duhnova · 2 years ago

Text

who’s in control? - choi seungcheol

seungcheol x fem!reader

word count: ~4.7k

warning(s): smut under the cut!! (mdni), porn with minimal plot, switch!reader, switch!seungheol (though more dom leaning), SENSE DEPRIVATION, thigh fucking, use of a color system, bondage, cum play?, princess and baby are used as a pet name, idol!seungcheol, marking kink? (kind of not really), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), dick riding, BIG DICK CHEOL (like monster dick), creampie, alludes to shower sex, mentions of food, pussy slapping, thigh smacking, man handling, body worship, nipple play, fingering, sense play??? (kind of, it’s like smell play i guess but it’s just barely barely there), let me know if i forgot anything! - don’t mind grammatical errors/typos (i tried)

cheol hasn’t had a break in what feels like years. from the months he spent on tour entertaining fans, exploring different countries, and making sure the boys stayed in check, it was safe to say he needed a break. and what better way to take a break than to go home to you, his perfect little baby who waited so patiently for his return.

the countless videos calls, and endless text messages did nothing for him (or you) while he was away, and even if the phone sex was enough to satiate him for the night he still missed the way your body felt under his, the way you scratched up his back, and the smell of sweat and sex in the air after hours of calculated thrusts and praise that was reserved only for when you were on your best behavior (which was 99% of the time).

that 1% is saved for rainy days, ones where you want to take control and ruin seungcheol the same way he ruins you; which it's rare for him to allow you to be on top, knowing you like to run with the power but today, after months away from you and working his ass off, he allows you to take control.

the ropes were soft on his skin, the twisted red silk accentuated his pecs and hips as you worked hard to weave out a pattern (that you so diligently learned while he was away, using your pillow as the test dummy). he couldn’t help but chuckle quietly at how concentrated you were, your face heating up more as you brought the rope down to his thighs, tugging it enough to squeeze them deliciously - the plush flesh pooling around the rope.

“you look so pretty.” he coos quietly when your eyebrows knit together, your look of concentration turns to frustration as you undo the knot you just did.

“you’re going to look even prettier once im done with you.” you smile as you finally get the last knot correct. sitting back on your heels you marvel at the masterpiece that is your boyfriend. his hands are bound to the headboard with poorly tied rope, the dark burgundy contrasting greeting from the cherry red that adorned the rest of his body.

“do i not look pretty right now?” he fake pouts at you before he's wiggling around to get more comfortable with the rope around him.

“of course you look pretty cheollie, youre the prettiest boy to ever exist.” he leaned down to kiss the tip of his nose.

“not the prettiest to ever exist?” his eyebrows raise a little as he tries to watch you trial kisses down to his collarbone but one harsh nip to the underside of his jaw has him hissing, his head lulling back to give you more access.

“always the prettiest to ever exist,” you mumble against his neck. “so pretty and all mine.” those words were familiar, the countless times cheol would say it to you played in the back of your mind as you smiled at the faint blush that spread down his neck. you had to bite your tongue to keep from teasing him, knowing that if you pushed your luck too far tonight he’d be sure to give back whatever you give him ten fold.

slowly you make your way down his neck and collarbones, leaving behind marks everywhere your lips touch. you poured months of love into every love bite, ensuring they won't fade until the end of the week.

with a featherlike touch, your fingers ghost over his left nipple, the bud hardening almost instantly as he gasps loudly. just as he started to mumble something you pinch it, the small shock of pain and pleasure causing his back to arch.

“watch it.” he breathes, there were rules put in place when you dommed. there were a lot of gray areas - his nipples being one of them, not that he didn’t enjoy it (he very much did) but when he was rendered helpless under you he'd rather not give you the advantage of attacking his weak spots (and yeah it's hypocritical of him, don't get him wrong he knows but you happily agreed to the rules because it gave you the perfect opportunity to use that 1% to freely be a brat).

you liked to bend the rules, it was the fun part about being the dom in situations like this. it wasn’t every day that you got cheol to submit under you, and god does he look pretty when his eyebrows pull together as his mouth falls open at the feeling of your pussy gliding along his painfully hard cock, the vein pulsing already from months of pent up energy.

“you’re already twitching and i’ve barely started touching you,” you giggle quietly, sitting so that you can run your hands up and down his stomach, the muscles in his abs flexing as he rocks his hips up against you, eliciting a quiet moan from you. “don’t be bad cheollie..” your voice trails off as you bite back your smug smile when you see the way his eyes widen a little.

“bad? the only one that's being bad right now is y-” you smack his thigh lightly, effectively stopping his words in their track as he groans quietly.

“watch it.” you repeat his words back to him, this time you couldn’t help the smirk that played on your lips as his jaw clenched. he was giving you time to fix yourself when he allowed you to continue with your ministries.

despite the hours you want to spend making him fall apart you can’t wait too long, the frustrations of not feeling each other in so long will have you both cumming before you’ve sat on his cock. however, it was a miracle you both lasted as long as you have - the foreplay starting the second he walked through the door when you jumped into his arms and started messily making out with him, his hips grinding into yours as he backed you up against the wall. it’s not like much changed now as you grind down against him harder, his cock sitting between your folds nicely - the tip knocking against your clit.

“if you don’t fuck me right now i am going to-” your hips stop moving again.

“you’re not going to do anything because you’re not the one in control here.” his lips twitch a little, he has to bite his bottom lip to keep from saying something. you were one more silent strike away from having your control ripped away.

“good boy.” cheol can’t help the small whine that leaves him at the praise. one thing that he will always admit is that you’re so hot when you praise him and he can’t help but melt every time. he relaxes back into the bed, allowing you to rock your hips again, your quiet whimpers music to his ears. it didn’t take long for you to get tired of the slow grinding, you needed more relief and with a new found determination you sat up on your knees.

you reach down to grab his cock that was warm and heavy in your hand. the sheer girth of it would be intimidating if you haven’t taken every inch down to the hilt a million times already. your fingertips don’t even touch as you squeeze gently, seungcheols eyes roll a little as he moans lowly at the feeling.

“fuck.” he breathes out when you start to pump your hands, precum leaking out of the tip. gently you swipe your thumb through the pearlescent liquid causing your boyfriend to moan louder, his head falling deeper into the pillows. you swipe your thumb a little harder as you squeeze him tighter in your hands, a quiet giggle leaving you when he tugs on the restraints around his hands as he groans, his head tilting down so he can watch you.

“getting impatient?” your eyebrows raise as you move to rub the tip of his cock against your clit before moving it towards your entrance where your pussy swallows the head instantly. your eyes flutter as you bite your lip hard to keep the loud moan from slipping out as you let gravity take its course as you sit down on his cock.

“i’m not the only impatient one,” he groans as he bucks his hips up to help you bottom out quicker. “fuck, you took me all without any prep.” his eyes were a little worried as he watched your shift around a little with your eyes squeezed shut tightly. the stretch definitely burned, you haven’t been stuffed this full in a long time, none of the toys you owned compared to seungcheol who nestled perfectly against your cervix and stretched you open as wide as a monster can.

“feels so good,” you whine after adjusting to having him inside of you. rocking your hips experimentally your nails dig into his stomach where his muscles are tensing - he was willing away the orgasm that was right there. “fill me up so perfectly cheollie.” he can’t help but whimper at the nickname, his hips snapping up into yours causing you to jump forward a little.

“fuck you feel so perfect around me baby,” he groans as he keeps rocking his hips up into yours, his feet planted on the bed so he has a better angle. “god, i’m not gonna last long like this.” his head falls back as his hands grip at his restraints. you let him rock his hips into yours a couple more times before you’re moving forward enough that his cock slips out, but his hips keep bucking up trying to chase your warmth. “wha-“

“you’re not gonna get to cum if you keep acting like you’re in control.” you’re finally able to catch your breath - not that it lasts long because just as the words leave your mouth there’s a loud snap as seungcheol breaks out of his restraints (effectively breaking the eighth headboard that year). you just hit strike three.

“whos in fucking control?” he gets you pinned in the blink of an eye, the weight he puts on your thighs is enough to keep you in place as he gets his hands out of the rope so he can tie yours to one of the bed posts at the foot of the bed.

“cheol-“

“i don’t want to hear it, you’re a brat you know that?” he cocks his eyebrow at you, challenging you to bite back at him like he’s so sure you’re going to do.

“but-“

“where the fuck is your gag.” he gets up off the bed to go find the little red gag he likes to shove in your mouth.

“cheollie please.” you try to reason with him, a pout on your face and arousal dripping all over the bed.

“color?” he stops in his tracks to look over his shoulder at you.

“green.” you smile sweetly at him.

“good,” he grins back before he’s holding up the gag. “any last words princess?”

“fuck me hard please?” you give him your best puppy dog eyes before opening your mouth to let him secure the gag.

“we’ll see if you deserve to get fucked after the shit you pulled tonight.” the harsh words were back as he went back to where he grabbed the gag, coming back a minute later with headphones and the pretty lace he likes to blindfold you with. “are these ok?” you nod your head in excitement as you lift your head allowing him to secure the lace around your eyes, you could barely see his outline as you settle back against the bed. the headphones were soundproof so the only thing you had to go off of was his touch on your body and a fuzzy silhouette.

seungcheol knew his limits and he knew how vulnerable you were like this. he knew what was good to do like this and what wasn’t, the boundaries set for sense deprivation played in his mind as he slowly ghosted his fingers up your stomach watching the goosebumps rise.

he wanted to ruin you, just like how you wanted to ruin him. he knew when he agreed to let you dom tonight and you brought the ropes out that he wasn’t going to get pampered in the way he thought - not that he minded because seeing you so reactive to him right now was so much better in his mind.

his fingers ghosted down your stomach towards your dripping cunt and the way your legs instantly parted had him chuckling to himself. he let his fingers wander down to your swollen clit where he rubs slow circles, a muffled moan leaves you as your back arches. he’s quick to pull his fingers away as he pushes you flat against the bed again.

seungcheol thought you were finally going to behave since he was being so nice with your punishment, but boy was he wrong. slowly your foot had crept up his inner thigh, catching him off guard a little before he grabbed your ankle and pushed your leg to the side so you’re spread wider for him, giving him the perfect opening to smack at your clit. it wasn’t hard, but it was enough to make you jolt and whine around the gag.

“such a brat.” he mumbles to himself as he sits back on his heels after setting your foot back on the bed. he watches as you use your foot to try and find him, it taps around on the bed but he sits just out of your reach.

shaking his head, a loving smile on his face he sits up on his knees so he can untie the rope from around his body. as much as he loved it he needed it gone if he wanted to feel every inch of your body against his. once he is free from the rope he moves around so he’s comfortably on his hands and knees right in front of where you’re laying.

i’m an effort to not startle you, he gently ghosts his fingers over your calf before he’s leaning down to kiss where he just touched. your body stills as you relax at feeling him again, you stay in place as you let him work his way up your body. his lips leave a warm trail up your legs and over your thighs as he skips over kissing near your cunt, instead jumping straight to your tummy where he kisses from one hip to the other before he slowly makes his way up to the valley between your breasts. he kisses between them and up to your neck, only stopping once he makes it to your cheek.

by this point his body is draped over yours, his cock sitting against your wet cunt as he kisses the other cheek so he can trail back down your body, kissing everywhere that he didn’t kiss the first time until he’s at your other calf.

“so pretty.” he whispers against your calf before he’s sitting back to assess what he wants to do next. subconsciously his hands rub at your calves, messaging them gently - only when you whimper does he get an idea.

slowly he pushes your legs together so your thighs are squished together. from there he pushes your legs up until you’re almost folded in half, your ankles held together in one hand. using his free hand cheol reaches up to push one of the headphone muffs off your ear.

“are you ok still? is this ok?” you nod your head while trying to mumble out a ‘yes’ before he readjusts the muff on your ear. he readjusts himself so he’s comfortably lined up with your thighs while making sure you’re comfortable as well.

with his empty hand he grabs the base of his cock and gives it a couple pumps before he’s rubbing the tip along the middle of your thighs before he slowly pushes between them. your arousal made them slick enough for him to comfortably slide between them as he started to thrust his hips.

“fuck.” he grunts to himself as he picks up speed. he wasn’t going to last long, he was so pent up and he just wanted release - so he rocks his hips faster. he lets your ankles go allowing your legs to rest on his shoulders as he uses his hands to push your thighs together more to give him more stimulation.

he groans and whimpers as his eyebrows knit together. his mouth fell open as his hips stuttered as he unloaded his hot cum all over your stomach. the way you whimpered, goosebumps rising on your skin and your back arching off the bed at the warm feeling on your skin.

seungcheol pants quietly as he lets your legs go, he rubs gently at your hips knowing that folding you like that took its toll on the joints there. humming quietly to himself he scoops some of the cum off your stomach so he can push it into your tight cunt. he pumps his cum into you slowly, enjoying the way your plush walls felt around his pointer and kindle finger.

“you feel so good around my fingers baby,” he smiles to himself as he trails the other hand up your stomach, smearing the cum all over you till he groped at your left tit, squeezing it and rolling his thumb over your nipple as he continues to pump his fingers slowly in and out of you.

as much as he wanted to fuck your properly, he also had to put you in your place. he could be cruel most nights, but to turn he was being nice and rewarding you with his fingers, allowing you to have some of his cum and an orgasm - but only because it had been so long.

just like him your orgasm was fast approaching, and sure you were stretched out on his cock but it was still satisfying as your back arched. this time he didn’t push you back down against the mattress as he kept playing with your nipple and fingering you slowly, his thumb rubbing on your clit. finally, like clockwork, the coil snapped in your stomach as you clenched around his fingers. he helped you ride your orgasm out before he pulled his fingers out to lick them clean, both of your juices mixed on his tongue.

“fuck.” he groans at the taste before he’s moving to hover over your body again. your legs part instantly against as he settles between them so he can lay against you, his lips attached to your neck as he leaves wet kisses everywhere.

you nose against his hair as he kisses and sucks gently at your neck, his body warm against yours as he lays against you. you can’t help but take in a deep breath, whimpering quietly when you realize he’s wearing your favorite cologne, it was faded at this point - hence why you couldn’t smell it until now, but it was still there enough for you to squeeze your legs around his waist.

“no no no,” he mumbles against your neck. he sits up to rub at the sides of your legs.l before he’s pulling the headphones off your head. “not tonight.” you weren’t able to argue back so you squeeze your legs tighter, trying to get him to give in when he feels the warmth of your cunt nuzzled up to the underside of his half hard cock.

“you’re covered in cum, and we didn’t put another blanket down so it’s gonna soak into the mattress if i don’t get you cleaned up and these sheets off.” he mumbles as he rubs his hands up your waist before he’s reaching up to pull the gag off, smiling when you take a deep breath instead of fighting him.

“but i asked so nicely for you to fuck me hard.” there’s the little brat he loves so much.

“not tonight, this was a punishment, remember? be happy that i even gave you my cum let alone an orgasm.” he grunts quietly when you tug him closer with your legs. “stop that.” he pulls the blind fold off of you before he leans over you to untie your hands.

“you’re wearing my favorite cologne.” you mumble, you wanted to argue more with him some more, wanting him to fuck you stupid.

“i’ve worn it everyday since being away from you,” he helped you sit up as he fixed your hair enough for it to stay out of your eyes. “it reminded me of you.” he smiles before leaning down to kiss you.

“i love you.” you mumble against his lips when he pulls away.

“i love you too princess,” he kisses you again. “now let’s get you cleaned up.”

—

when you woke up the next morning without cheol next to you, you couldn’t help but pout. sighing as you sit up, the apartment was cold as you grumpily threw the blankets off of you.

“of course he went to practice today, he’s been home not even a full twenty four hours and he’s already ditching me to-“ your ramble was cut off when you saw the stack of clothes sitting on the dresser with a note on top.

‘get comfy and text me when you’re awake princess’ singed cheollie.

that fucker was so going to get it later when he got home, you thought to yourself as you put his hoodie and oversized sweats in (thank god for a drawstring). throwing the hood over your head you couldn’t help but smile when you realized the hoody was sprayed (freshly) in your favorite cologne. the undertones of sweet blackberries has you squealing as you go to curl up on the couch to text cheol that you’re awake.

sure he wasn’t there with you right now but that didn’t stop him from spoiling you, he ordered you breakfast and even threw in extras of your favorites after you told him you were still pretty sore even though he was barely in you for a couple minutes.

did you want to spend the whole day with your boyfriend after he spent months abroad? yes. did you understand how important his job was and how much it meant to him? also yes. it’s why you put up with being alone all day, cuddled up in his clothes, covered in his cologne.

so when he got home later that night, tired and covered in sweat you were quick to drag him to the couch. you straddled his lap and ran your fingers through his semi damp hair, asking quietly about his day.

“i’m tired,” he mumbles as he looks up at you with so much love in his eyes. his hands rested on your waist as he rubbed and kneaded gently at the fabric covered flesh. “we have to leave soon again, you know that right? only for a couple days but we’ll be out of the country.”

“i know,” you pout a little as you settle in his lap. “that’s why i want to spend as much time as i can with you before then.” you start to rock your hips gently, after last night you were still very needy.

“does that include fucking me whenever you can too?” he tilts his head as he gives you a big smile, one that showed off his dimples.

“maybe..” you mumble, your cheeks heating up when cheol moves his hands to grope at your ass, squeezing it as he helps you rock against his hardening cock.

“you’re so cute when you’re needy,” he mumbles lowly before he’s leaning down to kiss you. it was safe to say he was needy too as he leans back into the couch, bringing you with him as he kisses you harder. “just wanna be inside you now.” you giggle quietly when you pull away from his lips. he huffs as he tries to follow your lips, not wanting to be away from you for long either.

“i need to take my pants off.” you wiggle out of his lap, earning you a scowl as he watches you untie the sweats slowly. “don’t look at me like that.”

“i’m going to rip those fucking pants off you if you don’t get back in my lap right now and ride me till you’re filled with my cum.” it was safe to say you’ve never moved quicker in your life, the pants were thrown somewhere behind you as you settled back in his lap, his own pants were pushed down allowing his cock to be free.

“suck a pretty dick.” you mumble as you watch him stroke it a couple times before running the tip through your folds. you bite your lip and whine quietly as you rest your hands on his shoulders to give you some stability as he pushes into you slowly, this time allowing you to adjust as he slowly bottoms out.

“fuck, so tight,” he groans as he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you flush against his chest. “and all for me.” you whine quietly.

“all you’re cheollie,” you bury your face in his neck when you experimentally rock your hips. “only yours.”

“good,” he grunts as he lets you take the reins in setting the pace, allowing you to have that ounce of control because physically he was tired and just wanted to relax while you rode him. “all mine, just like i’m all yours.” he kisses the side of your head before you pick up your pace, your hips bouncing slowly as you find a rhythm you like.

considering you were already dripping by the time he got home and he was pent up with frustrations from practice you both didn’t need a lot before you were falling apart. your hips rocked and bounced and circled around on cheols as you felt the muscles in his body relax and tense up again when his orgasm came crashing over him like a tidal wave.

“fuck, y/n.” he moans as he squeezes you tighter in his arms, your hips unrelenting as you simultaneously helped him ride out his orgasm while chasing yours.

your lips left open mouth kisses on his neck much like he did with you last night, your fingers tangled in the hairs at the base of his neck as your moans got whinier, breathier. you were determined to milk him dry. even when your hips started to feel sore you refused to stop moving your hips, wanting to ride till you were sure you were stuffed full.

cheols face was buried in your shoulder as he pushed you down on his cock one last time before he stilled you, the overstimulation was making him go fuzzy with warmth. he holds you in place like that for a couple minutes, allowing you to messily leave love bites all over his neck till he was sure the makeup artist was going to hate him come time to perform in a couple days.

“i’ve missed you, did i ever tell you that yesterday?” cheol finally speaks when you finish sucking at his neck.

“yes, a million times as you walked through the door.” you giggle, squealing when he stands up abruptly, his softening cock slipping out causing a mix of your cum to drop down your thighs and into his shirt.

“well i’m going to tell you a million more times as we go shower and have dinner.” he smiles as he kisses your cheek before hoisting you up higher in his arms so he can reach down and fix his pants enough so they don’t fall and trip him as he carries you to the bathroom.

and as he starts the shower and undresses you he mumbles a million ‘i missed you’’s and while you pee, before stepping into the shower, he orders you guys dinner that’ll hopefully arrive just as you guys are finishing up. (it might get cold sitting outside the door though because cheol underestimates just how insatiable you both as as he fucks tou properly up against the glass shower door).

#svthub #seungcheol smut #seventeen smut #seungcheol x reader #choi seungcheol #seungcheol

2K notes · View notes

builtbybrokenbells · 1 year ago

Text

Guilty Pleasures

Due to a strong foundation of trust and a willingness to share, a situation which would normally be catastrophic, seems to turn out to be quite rewarding.

Pairing: danny wagner x f!reader, jake kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 20.4k (i am so sorry)

Warnings: SMUT 18+, threesome, unprotected/protected sex, rough sex, anal sex, double penetration, oral (f!receiving), oral (m!receiving), face fucking, fingering (f!receiving), dirty talk (lots and lots of dirty talk), choking, biting, name calling, praise, slight impact play, daddy kink, dom/sub, voyeurism, degradation, jealousy, mentions of cheating/thoughts of infidelity, arguing, asshole/shit disturber Jake, angst, fluff, sorry if i miss any!

this is pretty much pure porn. plot at the beginning, but mostly just sex. took a break from gdw for a little while just to straighten my thoughts with it, and came up with this idea and could not stop myself from writing it. it’s super long and very lightly edited, so I do apologize for that. please don’t judge me too hard for this one 😭 as always, be kind, enjoy, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes!

also! italics are the memories/past, everything else is present! thought I’d try something new this time 😁

The chime of the bell above the door signalled the entry of the newest patron of the bar. Normally, you would have eagerly greeted whoever walked in, but tonight, you were caught up in the chaos of the already crowded room. Dollar bills were waving in front of your face, hands raised in the air to catch your attention, and the occasional shout from an impatient customer filled the already loud atmosphere. Beer bottles were flying across the sticky wooden countertop in exchange for cash. Margarita and shot glasses were lined before you, only empty for a moment before they were shoved in the proper direction, too. You were working faster than you could comprehend, barely hanging on but surviving from the thought of your coworkers starting shift in a few minutes.

You took the early shift, thinking that you could breeze through the night with minimal stress and effort. For the most part, you were correct in thinking so. Unfortunately, when the clock struck eight, the city’s nightlife took a dramatic turn. As a result, the bar was quickly overrun with guests desperate for a buzz. Some were understanding, kindness oozing from them as long as they had a drink in their hand. Others were not, but you couldn’t blame them. There were far too many people in the bar for only a single bartender, and that wasn’t really a management issue, either. You were an establishment that was plagued with long time regulars and middle aged men in search of companionship. Every now and then a group of older women would check the place out, but rarely anyone under 30. So, you were confident in saying that it was unusual for you to house so many people in a single night, let alone all at once.

You rushed through your last few customers, serving everyone who had been waiting in hopes that they would still be generous enough to leave a tip. For the most part they were, and for that you were thankful. When the last person retreated, happily sipping on their beverage of choice, you took a moment to breathe. With both hands planted on the countertop and your head towards the floor, you took a much needed minute of rest. When a body presented itself in front of you once more, you thought you might shed a tear just at the thought of fixing another drink. “What are you drinking tonight?” You asked, aiming to sound as cheery as possible.

“You don’t know by now?” At the sound of the familiar tone, your head snapped up in surprise. “I’d be lying if I said that doesn’t hurt.”

“Shut up,” you landed a playful smack on his arm, your first genuine smile of the night fighting its way on to your lips. “Of course I do.” The words fell from your lips as you reached under the counter for a glass. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, the sound ringing nicely to his ears. You turned, grabbing a whiskey bottle from the top shelf, wasting no time pouring a double shot over the cubes. “Top shelf whiskey, always. Doesn’t matter the price, as long as that’s where it’s from and it’s a double.” You smirked, turning to place the bottle back in its place. “Three or four ice cubes. Not enough to water it down, but enough to keep it cold.” You continued, reaching for a citrus peel neatly arranged into a spiral from a plastic container beside the glasses. “And something to make it look pretty, as long as it doesn’t change the taste.” You arranged it neatly on the rim with a hint of cockiness seeping through your pores. “And served with a smile, because that’s what makes it taste the best.” You placed it in front of him, paired with the sweetest smile your cheeks could adorn and a soft wink.

“You really do know me, trouble.” He picked up the glass, swirling it around so the ice could cool the liquid. “I’m sorry I ever doubted you.”

“You should be, Jacob. I wouldn’t be a very good bartender if I forgot my favourite customers’ order.” He took a small sip, fighting the urge to dish out another compliment. He knew better, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t tempted.

“Busy spot tonight,” he noted, looking around at the bustling room. The booths and tables were so full that people had taken to standing by the walls, content with being seatless and lost in chatter with each other. “Suppose you actually had to work, not just sit here and look pretty.”

“Nothing wrong with doing both.” You reminded. “Although I don’t think you’d know too much about the working class.”

“Right,” he chuckled, taking a seat on one of the stools. “But I do know a thing or two about looking pretty.” You gave him a shrug, not willing to play into his ego.

“Where’s the rest of your company tonight?” You changed topics, careful not to tread too deeply. “Not like you to stag it.”

“On their way. I’d give them about ten minutes, then I’ll worry.” He assured you. “Maybe I just wanted you all to myself for a night.” He posed the theory as if he had never divulged in the glory of seclusion with you. You ignored him, unwilling to admit that you didn’t mind him on his lonesome.

“What can I get for you, darlin’?” You asked, barely looking up from your hands.

“Whiskey, top shelf. You can pick.” The voice rang through you as if it was blessed with the grace of god himself, settling in your chest and warming your soul. You finally broke your focus from your lime cutting, curious to see if the face matched the beauty of the voice. As if it were some kind of sick joke, the sight of his face seemed even more heavenly than the sweet tone of his words. “Only a couple ice cubes, though. Don’t want to water it down too much.”

“Top shelf?” You asked for clarification. Normally, nobody even eyed the liquor that far up in fear that it would break the bank.

“Price doesn’t matter, sweetheart. Quality does.” As beautiful as he was, he did seem a tad cocky. You supposed you could brush it to the side unless it became a real problem. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, turning to the wall of liquor to pick his poison. You used the step stool to reach for a bottle on the far left. You brought it down with caution, returning to him with a raised eyebrow. He glanced at the label and gave a nod of approval.

“Single?”

“Always a double.” You could hear a smile hidden in his tone. You poured the whiskey over the ice, the crackle striking him with curiosity. “Ice usually goes in last, does it not?”

“Been doing this a long time,” you chuckled “tastes better this way.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” He hummed. As you turned to place the bottle back in its original place, you could feel his eyes burning into you. When you turned back to him, your suspicion was confirmed. He seemed shameless about his unwavering stare. “Got anything to make it look pretty?” You let out a sigh, pondering what you could add to it. You pulled out a citrus twist, showing it to him. “Will it change the way it tastes?” He smirked.

“Unless you’re planning on eating it, no.” You teased, garnishing the rim with it. “Probably wouldn’t be very pleasant if you did.” You passed it to him, smiling at the peculiar interaction.

“That smile will make it taste even better, though.” He noted, eyes still glued to you. “What’s your name, sweetheart?”

“Y/n,” you said, feeling a hint of a blush plaster your cheeks. “What about you? Never seen you around here before.”

“Sweetheart suits you better.” He noted. “I’m Jake.” He replied, taking a sip of the beverage. He gave a nod of approval paired with a little smile, one that stole the air straight from your lungs. “Just moved here, thought I’d check the place out.”

“Satisfied so far?” You weren’t shy in admitting your question was laced with filthy undertones. You were certain you would let him take you right then and there with no guilt at all. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and his interest in you was very apparent.

“Incredibly,” he let out a small laugh. “What about you, trouble?”

“What about me?” You shot back, thankful that the bar was nearly empty. You thought it would be worse than torture, having to cut your conversation with him short.

“Are you satisfied, sweetheart?”

Jake was the devil in disguise, and that you were certain of. His charm was like no other, but his intentions were his downfall. He would do anything for a night of fun, but that’s where his involvement ended. He was quick with a joke, always trying for a laugh. Compliments were steadily flowing, and his gaze was always the same; attempting to undress you with his eyes alone. You were sure Jake could make a great friend if you allowed him to get that close, but it was much too risky for you to entertain. You had fallen victim to him once, and had never fully recovered. To step in time with him was assurance of certain death, and that was something you could never forget. Although beautiful, his love was not something desirable. Despite knowing that, you seemed desperate to convince yourself of the fact every time you were near him.

“Aren’t you always trying to get me alone?” You chuckled, hearing the door chime once more.

“Always trying, never succeeding.” He shrugged, taking a long drink from his cup. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“I wonder why that is, Jacob.” You rolled your eyes. The conversation came to a halt as soon as the words left your mouth. Danny, Josh and Sam had joined you two at the bar, taking a seat beside their brother while still amidst their own conversation.

“I wonder, too.” Jake said, always needing to get the last word in. You clenched your jaw, already finding yourself annoyed with him despite only being in his company for a short time.

“That’s it, beautiful. Just like that.” His desperation was evident, heavy breathing sounding through the room and staining the walls with sin. It was a sin you would never be able to forgive yourself for, one that was made in a moment of weakness and left an air of suffering in its wake. “Does that feel good?” His fingers were knotted in your hair, laced around the strands like a snake settling in for a kill. No verbal response could compare to the vulgarity of your moans. “Tell me how good it feels, baby.”

You broke your stare from his face, feeling a wave of indignation washing over you at the vile memory. It was something that plagued you, seeming to poison every pleasant thought and ruin it indefinitely. To him, it seemed like a typical Sunday afternoon activity. Jake was always dripping with sex appeal, and sex was his favourite pastime. It was a horrendous pairing of traits. He had no remorse for his actions, none at all for making you fall for him and then disappearing as if he never existed at all. You were a one night stand, and he left your apartment that night with no intent of ever speaking to you again. You were a fool for him, in love by the first touch, and you were nothing more than a conquest to him, a challenge with little significance, and you were one he proved so easily forgettable.

You never wanted to see him again, almost happy he had vanished after the initial shock wore off. You vowed if you were to see him again, you wouldn’t even cast a glance in his direction. You did well; the first few times he came back around the bar you barely even acknowledged his existence. That struck a nerve in him you didn’t even realize he could have. Emotion was very low on Jake’s list of priorities, but you seemed to invoke every single one in him. It bothered him so much that he refused to return to the bar you worked at for many months in fear of facing rejection again. He avoided you just long enough for you to meet a fantastic person, one who seemed very willing to give you the love you were looking for. One that found himself sitting in the same bar seat Jake had once sat, staring just as longingly at you as Jake did. This time, the patron was in it for more than a hookup, and had fallen for you far beyond anything Jake could ever comprehend feeling.

It was fantastic; a dream come true, even. Someone who loved in the same way you did, adorned the same outlook on life, and had the same morals and passions. It was so fantastic that it seemed too good to be true. “Hey, beautiful.” Danny leaned over the counter, placing a kiss to your cheek as you sat a beer bottle in front of him. “I missed you.”

Correction: it was too good to be true.

“I missed you.” You smiled, eyes fluttering closed at the feeling.

“Ten more minutes and you can join us on the other side.” Sam joked, eyeing the clock.

“Oh, I know. I’ve been counting the seconds.”

Jake had done such a good job at disappearing that he had dug his own grave. Instead of mustering the courage to confront you, to apologize and make amends for his actions, he gave you ample opportunity to fall in love with his best friend. As if it was some type of sick joke, a repercussion for the sins you committed with him, you had no idea that they were so close until it was far too late. You were already falling fast for the curly haired boy who appeared to be the exact opposite of Jake Kiszka. You were so desperate to purge Jake from your life that you failed to realize Danny was a sure way to allow him right back in.

“My friends are gonna join me, tonight. Is that okay?” Danny was nervous, that much was obvious. But, he was cute when he was nervous, and you couldn’t imagine why meeting his friends would cause any kind of problem.

“F’course it is, handsome.” You smiled, handing a bottle to him after ridding it if the cap. “You know, draft would be much cheaper. And better for the environment.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he smiled, finding it impossible to stop admiring you. “They can be a lot, sometimes. I just don’t want them to scare you away.” He chuckled.

“I like you, Daniel. I’m dating you because I like you, not because of your friends. Besides, crazy never really bothered me much. I work at a bar, so I’m sure I’ve met worse.” He laughed, nodding along to your words.

“Suppose I can’t argue that.” He agreed. “If you like them, we can properly hang out sometime. I just thought that if you didn’t, you could pretend to be busy with something else.”

“Thoughtful, but not necessary. I’m sure I’ll love them.” You leaned over and placed a kiss to his cheek. “You worry too much.”

“I like you, what can I say?” He smiled, appreciative of your attitude. “Plus, they keep pestering me about coming here all the time. Figured I couldn’t keep you a secret much longer.”

“Oh, so I’m a secret?” You teased, sending him a wink.

“Not like that,” he rolled his eyes, but he was laughing as he did so. “If I could, I’d keep you all to myself for the rest of my life. What if you like one of them more than me?”

“Impossible.” You assured him, sending look of finality to show him you were serious. “I’m going to clean off the booths, give me a shout when they get here, okay?”

“For a kiss,” he smirked.

“That just comes with the service.” You giggled, leaning forward and capturing him in a moment of sweetness. “That better not count as my tip.” You joked as you pulled away.

“I’ll give that to you after work.” He assured you as you shuffled out from behind the counter.

“I’m counting on it!” You replied, already busying yourself with clearing away empty bottles and glasses. By the time you finished the line of booths, your tray was full to the brim. You hummed along to the music playing over the sound system as you returned to your post, barely noticing your surroundings as you discarded the tray full of clutter. When you swung around, you noticed there were more people at the bar than there were previously. Danny had a smile stuck on his lips as he found himself in mindless conversation with his company. You even found yourself smiling, too, looking over the new faces in attempt to familiarize yourself with them.

The first two looked strikingly familiar, both showcasing features that were not only perfectly suited for their face, but also had an air of similarity. You figured they must be brothers. You and Danny had yet to discuss much other than each other, as the relationship was quite new. You were certain in its strength, but meeting friends was a huge step forward in the process of loving each other. You didn’t stare for too long, realizing that there was another friend you had yet to see. Your head turned down the line of boys, landing on someone who had already made quick work at staring at you. Your stomach dropped, quickly understanding the reason for the other boy’s familiarity. You felt like the ground was stolen from underneath you, that the universe was wrapping its cold fingers around your neck and slowly strangling the life from you. Your palms were sweaty, head spinning with no sign of stopping.

“Remember my order, sweetheart?” He murmured, glancing to his side to make sure Danny hadn’t noticed your volatile reaction.

“Of course I do.” Your words were paired with a scowl, at a loss for ideas on how to dig yourself out of the hole you were in.

You threw your apron in the laundry bin, counting out the cash tips to mark them down in the book. Once it was recorded, you let your hair down from its elastic, running your fingers through the mess of knots the nights stress had created. Once you were able to rid yourself of the aura of darkness that was looming over your head, you managed to force yourself back out into the bar. The noise was immediately overwhelming, seemingly much louder now that you were on the other side of the counter. “Whiskey sour, please.” You gave your coworker a smile, silently thanking them for showing up on time.

“You staying?” He asked, immediately springing to action at your words.

“Guess so.” You sighed, placing the change on the counter. “As if I’m not here enough.” You grumbled. “Danny thinks we should spend our free time here, too.”

“At least try to have fun,” he laughed at your grim expression. As soon as the drink was in front of you, you took a long sip.

“You too.” You chuckled, turning your head to scan the crowd. You noticed that the boys had claimed a booth in your time away, settling in with little hesitation. You walked over, grabbing a chair from a table and placing it at the end of the booth.

It had been years since you and Danny had started dating, and it had been phenomenal. You didn’t have a single complaint aside from Jake, and neither did he. A year or so prior, you had even moved in together. You adored him, and he was your whole world. You had no doubt in choosing him as a life partner, but you did wish that you had never given in to the temptation of Jake. Because even years later, he still looked at you the same way he did that first night he showed up at the bar. Even with no hint of success, or an idea that he would ever have you like that again. He was relentless, and it was excruciating.

Even as in love with Danny as you were, you couldn’t lie and say that Jake was not attractive. You had fallen into bed with him once, and for good reason. You had no desire to be with him, no need for him in any way that mattered, but he was like a parasite, begging to leech life directly from the source. He flirted as if you weren’t practically married to his best friend, as if he didn’t care about hurting him in the crossfire. You shot him down most of the time, but even the best of people had their moments of weakness. There were some nights, albeit few and far between, that you found yourself tipsy enough to entertain him for a moment before the crushing guilt took over.

Danny was not ignorant to what happened between you and Jake. In fact, he was quite aware of Jake’s intense infatuation with you. It would be untruthful to say that it never caused any issues, but there was no world in which it wouldn’t. Danny was quite trusting in you, confident in your love and knew you respected him enough to never stray. That was wholeheartedly true, and being unfaithful to him was never a thought that crossed your mind. Sex with Jake, even as mind blowing as you knew it was, was not worth risking a lifetime of love with Danny. It was futile, and you knew that one night with Jake would always be just that. He hated the thought of commitment, and would never settle down. It was not worth losing everything that Danny gave to you.

“We have to tell him!” You spat, palms landing flat on his chest and pushing him backwards. You were not one for physical violence, but Jake always seemed to bring out the worst in you.

“Fine, then tell him!” He barked back, neither of you caring about your volume or presentability. “Why does it have to fall on me?”

“Because you’re the one who started it! You finally got me to have sex with you, and then you left! You disappeared! You got what you wanted, like always, and now look at the problems it caused!” You exploded. “I’m not risking losing him over someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” He chuckled, looking at you with a fierce shield of carelessness, as if your words hadn’t cut him deeper than a knife. “Fine, we’ll tell him. I’ll go in there and tell him just how good you look from behind, or how beautiful those slutty little noises sound, especially when my name was stuck on those pretty lips. I’m sure he’d love to hear about all of that.” He smirked, lighting a fire in you like no other.

“Fine, I’ll go in there and tell him how you spent weeks getting me to fall for you. Came in here every night so desperate for attention that you couldn’t leave until we kicked you out. You wanted me so bad that you drank us out of liquor, and when you finally had me, you broke my fucking heart. Would you like me to tell your brothers, too? ‘Cause I can talk all night about how terrible of a person you are.” His eyes changed; the defensive nature he previously held was obsolete. He knew he had done wrong, but he had no idea how badly he truly hurt you. He was at a loss for words, so he said the only thing he believed held any meaning.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered. The cold air of the night was nipping at the tip of your nose, but the wind hitting you was unable to compete with the slap of his pathetic apology.

“Fuck you, Jake.” You shook your head, grimacing at the thought of him being apologetic about his actions. “I’m telling him. I really like him, and he deserves the truth. Dishonesty isn’t really my thing, even if it is yours.”

And tell him, you did. It was a tearful confession, an admission of guilt for something you didn’t really need to be ashamed of. He was almost too understanding, showering you with comfort when you felt like he should have walked out. It did sting for him to hear, but he was not willing to blame you for a choice you made months before ever knowing him. His willingness to accept you as is was more than enough for you to fall in love with him. He appreciated the truth, and from there on you two had built a loving life with each other. The thought of Jake was less daunting and more manageable. For the first little while, Jake backed down with the understanding that he was in the wrong. He allowed you to live your life, pretending as if he never knew you until Danny introduced you to each other. It was the amicable thing to do, but unfortunately Jake had no idea how to maintain that outlook. It only took a few months before his insufferable personality made its inevitable return.

“You’re quiet, tonight.” Danny nudged you, sending a soft smile your way.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It was a long shift. I’ve never seen it this busy in here.” You said, taking a long drink from your glass. It was nearing the end, and you were itching to go for another one, just to escape Jake’s burning stare for a moment.

“That’s okay,” he placed his hand on your knee under the table, sending a jolt of comfort through you. “We don’t have to stay out for long.”

“It’s okay,” you assured him, placing your hand atop of his. “We can do whatever. I’ll be happy as long as I’m with you.” He gave you a lingering stare, one that told you he felt the same way, but he wasn’t sure if he completely believed you.

You weren’t certain as to why Jake was bothering you so much more as of recent. Bothering was not the proper term, really. He never bothered you; his advances were not uncomfortable or troublesome. Infuriating by times, yes, but he was harmless in every sense of the word. He was affecting you more, and that was a strange feeling. You had spent the last few years managing to ignore almost every sly pass or risky comment. It had become routine, Jake capturing you in a moment of seclusion and doing his best to make your loyalty falter. It was always the same story; a few eye rolls, a scoff, and maybe even a playful shove that had incredible amounts of hidden frustration behind it. Jake was the master at flirtation, and you had mastered rejection. It grew increasingly easier over time, and now it was barely a chip off your shoulder. The beginning proved tough, but you persevered to a point where it barely bothered you in any way that mattered. Lately, it seemed like it was more impactful than your typical game of cat and mouse. His touches held more emotion, lingering for a moment too long. His eyes held unspoken words, and his moves were no longer meant to maim; they were aimed to kill.

You found yourself playing into him more, entertaining the idea before ultimately shutting it down after the crushing guilt took over. You would never do that again, and even more so, you would never do that to Danny. You repeated the mantra in your head until the words seemed to bleed from the walls. As firm as you were on your stance, Jake had a devastatingly intoxicating attitude, and you weren’t a stranger to his temptation even long after his initial strike all of those years ago.

“Making drinks even on your days off?” The dulcet tone caught your attention, unexpected and causing you to stutter with your movements. The bottle of vodka moved off target and caused a small spill on the table. You didn’t look up to the perpetrator, no need to see him to know who it was.

“You know me, live to work instead of work to live.” You chuckled. It was true; you were so invested in working that a social life had never been a priority for you. Money was a wicked motivator, and even if the bar was not typically bustling, your regulars were quite generous with their tips. You’d been working at the same bar since you had moved out of your parents house and you had no imminent plans to leave. The owners were nice, they had given you a promise of a manger’s position if you ever wanted it, and you thoroughly enjoyed your coworkers company. The wages weren’t awful and the tips were great. You saw no issue with working, and made it a point to do it as much as you could.

“Makes me think that you don’t want to be at home.” Jake theorized, taking a step closer to you as you swiped away the spilled alcohol. “Is everything as fantastic as you make it seem, or is being tied down not all it’s cracked up to be?” He was beside you, now. His charm was radiating from him, inviting you in without you even noticing how badly it burned. You could feel the warmth from his body slowly surrounding you, a feeling that you hadn’t experienced in a long time. You finally looked towards him, trying to maintain some semblance of passiveness with his advance.

“I’m quite content, Jacob.” You said, holding his stare with no intention of backing down. “Makes me think that you’re projecting.” He let out a chuckle, shaking his head at your need to argue.

“Was just a thought, sweetheart.” He looked towards the table. “Is it such a terrible thing to be worried about a friend?”

“Considering you and I are far from friends, and I know you’re not worried about anything other than sex, yeah.” You also looked to the table, pouring the mix into the three glasses before you. You placed straws in each of them, giving a slight stir as you did.

“I didn’t know it was a crime to enjoy sex.” He shrugged, a smirk toying at his lips.

“It’s not. Think lots of people do.” You snipped, looking towards him. “It’s a crime to want it from your best friends girlfriend.” He chuckled, shamelessly enjoying the fire in your tone.

“Not if I had you first,” he reminded, thrilled by the shift in your expression. Talk of what came before Danny had been strictly forbidden, and you both had done well adhering to it after the initial blowout of the truth. His hand slipped to your waist, fingers dangerously dancing close to parts of you he was no longer allowed access to. The tips of his fingers settled just near your ass; not close enough for an offence, but clearly toying the line between right and wrong.

“That never happened, Jake. Remember?” You prompted him to recall the harsh boundaries you had put in place months prior.

“Oh, I remember,” he smiled, pulling you in to him a little closer. “I think about it all of the time. How could I forget?” It was clear that the two of you were not speaking about the same memory. There was no space left between your bodies, your chest pressed to his and his lips hovering over your own. “Do you remember?”

“Jake,” you warned, knowing that this was far beyond any level of comfort for anyone. He was pushing every possible boundary, and you weren’t sure if it was because he wanted you, or if he just wanted to see you crack under the pressure. Most of the time, anything Jake did seemed more like a punishment or a test rather than anything positive. You wanted to believe he was genuine, but you knew him to be sly and willing to do whatever it took to get what he wanted. You could feel him pulling you in despite both of you being as still as possible. It was just how he was; his eyes were inviting, as was every other physical aspect of him. The only deterrent was his personality, and even that wasn’t completely horrible by times. But it was a trick, as it always was, and as much as your body wanted to fall for it, you knew it was more than wrong. It was despicable.

When his nose was touching yours, brushing together with a million sparks of electricity, you finally came back to reality. You raised your hand, pressing it flat to his chest and pushed him backwards. You were livid at yourself for allowing him to get so close, but even angrier at him for trying so hard to make you fall for it. “What’s wrong, sunshine?” He smiled. The air was still laced with notes of whiskey. It radiated off him as if he used it as holy water. At one time, the scent was alluring, deadly when mixed with his cologne. Now, it seemed repulsive. “Not even once, for old times sake?”

“Never again.” You snapped, unwilling to believe that he truly thought you would agree to his request. “You’re hammered.” You noted, feeling the choke of tears in your throat. “Go home.” The regret for even allowing him near you was debilitating.

“All alone?” The smirk he held was infuriating.

“Go home, Jake.” A third voice broke through the tension in the air. You both turned to the entryway of the kitchen, seeing Danny standing with his arms crossed. He didn’t seem angry, more like he just wanted to put an end to the chaos and move on. Jake raised his hands in surrender, casting one more sideways glance at you before shuffling towards the door.

Sam sat a third drink in front of you, prompting you to utter a small thank you for his kind gesture. You were already tipsy, before you even joined them for a drink you could feel your head swirling from exhaustion. Alcohol certainly did not help you wake up, nor did it help the incessant memories from the past. You wasted no time bringing the straw to your lips in attempt to wash down the bitter aftertaste of remembering. You closed your eyes, desperate to focus on anything other than the ache of knowing Jake in any other way than surface level. Even the burn of the whiskey was preferable to the burn of him.

“Maybe you should slow down, baby.” The concerned tone was less of a comfort and more like a stab to an already open wound. You set the glass back on the table, eyes flickering to your boyfriend. You bit the inside of your lip, trying to focus on him and him alone. You could feel Jakes eyes searing into the back of your skull, begging you to look at him instead. Had it been a battle for affection, a challenge of courtship, you could be more sympathetic for the boy, but everyone was painfully aware that Jake was not after you with intentions of marrying. Sure, he liked you, but it was in a way that only Jake could comprehend. To everyone else, it seemed like he viewed you as a conquest, thinking he would have gratification like no other if he was able to steal you back for just one more night. It was vile, and no matter how much you tried to stop it, it only seemed like he was even more mesmerized by you.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry.” You nodded, fidgeting with your hands on your lap. You looked guilty, even if you had nothing to be guilty about. There was never an instance between you and Jake that Danny was unaware of. He was the first to know, and he knew it all. Perhaps your guilt was not accredited to your night spent with Jake, but rather your deepest desire for the chance again. It was horrendous to even consider it, but Jake was unlike anyone else. Again, you had no desire to be with him in any way that mattered, and in truth, sex did not necessarily matter. At least, not in any way worthwhile. You knew that you were undeniably attracted to Jake, and you likely would jump at the opportunity to have sex with him again, as long as it didn’t hurt anyone else. Knowing that it was implausible to invite Jake in without disaster, you shoved that idea as far down as humanly possible. For a long time, it never seemed to resurface, but every time he attempted to ignite the old flame, it seemed to push forward a little more. Tonight, it was impossible to ignore.

By times it seemed like guilt was the only emotion you knew how to feel. Guilt for past mistakes before Danny ever came in to your life, and for being in his life after said mistake. Guilt for giving into his temptation, even if it was just slightly, and even more so for rejecting him while knowing you would accept if the circumstance were different. There was no possibility you could bring the idea up to your boyfriend, and you weren’t sure if you even wanted to. The desire was strong, but not nearly enough to risk losing everything. Instead, you opted to suffer in silence. It was always better that way, anyway. A problem could only be true once it was spoken into existence.

You knew you were incorrect about all of your conclusions, but you chose to continue on the path, anyway. It didn’t matter if you kept it silent; Jake Kiszka was very much a problem, and that would never go away unless it was dealt with directly.

Perhaps it was the decade of friendship that made the predicament so troublesome. You would never bring the situation to an ultimatum, mostly because it was wrong to make him choose between you two, but a small part of you was afraid that you would not win that battle. Your relationship was strong, and had been since the very beginning, but you were unsure if you could compete with a lifetime of friendship, nor the bandmate bond. Jake was going to be a part of Danny’s life indefinitely, and not just in a social setting. They were family, coworkers, and friends. You knew that if you wanted to be in his, too, you would have to learn how to cope with the reality.

“You okay, trouble?” Josh smiled, pointing his gaze at you. You gave a nod, trying to look as pleasant as possible. Even the sound of the nickname made your stomach churn, even if Josh used it in a much better way than his brother did.

“Oh, yeah. Think I just need to get out of the work zone and into the fun one.” You chuckled.

“So what’s with that, anyway?” You asked, handing the whiskey glass to the boy in hopes that you would be lucky enough to brush fingers with him. Any contact was worth the world, even if it was minuscule.

“What?” Jake grinned, doing just as you hoped he would. As he received the glass, he let his fingers rest on yours for just a second too long.

“Why do you call me trouble?” You laughed, unsure of where his nickname originated.

“Oh, I forgot your name. Had to think of something on the spot.” He joked, taking a sip of his drink and watching for a reaction. You rolled your eyes, knowing very well that it was a lie. “You’re gonna make me say it, aren’t you?” He sighed, leaning in a little closer.

“I would appreciate it.” You gave him a sweet smile, coaxing the answer from him.

“It’s my indirect way of saying I like you, sweetheart.” He hummed, eyes never leaving your face. He was revelling in the blush that dusted your cheeks. “Plus, a girl as beautiful as you is nothing but trouble.”

“Don’t flatter me, Jacob.” You brushed him off, but felt yourself leaning closer to him over the bar top.

“But it’s my favourite thing to do.”

“I’m going to grab another drink.” You announced, standing as you looked over the table. “Anyone else?” All of the boys put in their orders, thanking you for the offer. Just as you were about to turn, Jake stood, too.

“You’ll need someone to help carry them,” he said in response to your pointed stare. Without argument or agreement, you turned and walked towards the bar. You didn’t have to see him to know he was following; you could feel it. You took post at the bar, waiting for the bartenders to come to you. Jake joined you, wasting no time placing a light hand on your back. “What’s bothering you, sweetheart?” He asked, voice low enough so only you could hear him.

“I’m just peachy, Jake. No need to worry.” You grumbled, pulling out your card to pay for the order.

“For some reason, I don’t think that’s true.” He also pulled out his wallet, ready to race you for the bill. “Usually you already would have threatened to throw a drink at me. Tonight, you won’t even look at me.”

“It would be a waste of a perfectly good drink.” Your response was short and sweet, clearly showcasing your desire to end the conversation.

“Have I got you that bothered, tonight?” You could hear the smirk in his tone before you even looked at him.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you scoffed, finally looking over to meet his eyes. The sight of his face was enough to make your heart skip a beat, so beautiful that it was almost haunting. The parallels of the two universes were debilitating when you thought about them for too long; one in which Jake would trip over himself to flatter you, and one where you would kick him to the ground before he could try.

“Don’t have to; you do that for me.” His smirk turned into a smile, his hand still lingering on your lower back.

“How many times do I have to tell you this is never going to happen?” You sighed.

“When you actually mean it.” He chirped back, wasting no time.

“I think I’ve been pretty clear.” You argued. “You know, like the the million other times I’ve told you.”

“Right,” he nodded, but mischief was dancing in his eyes. “So you don’t like it when I stop by to see you before everyone else? Or when I tell you how pretty you look?” He chuckled, already knowing the answer. “I think that you do like it, just not when Danny’s around.” And he was correct, as disgusting as it was. You had said a million times that you didn’t care for his antics, but he could see the dishonesty as if it were written all over you and stamped on your forehead in big, red letters.

“I think that you should learn how to listen, Jacob.” Even as you spoke, you could feel yourself leaning into his side ever so slightly, wordlessly inviting his attention and touch.

“I’m listening, y/n.” He assured you, mouth leaning in closer to your ear. You were enveloped in a cloud of alcohol, both of your inhibitions lowered and the primal pleasure from the touch was undeniable. “I’ll listen to you all night, if you’ll let me, but I don’t think you’ll be doing much talking.”

“Jake, I’m in love with your best friend.” You reminded.

“I’m not asking you to be in love with me.” He said, lips barely hovering over your ear now.

“This is wrong. You have to stop.” You muttered, but the warning was feeble, barely any strength behind it. He had finally gotten ahead, and he was relishing in his victory. “He’s your best friend, Jake. This is despicable.”

“Fine,” he seemed like he was going to bargain, but knowing Jake, his bargain was not worth the time or energy. “If you won’t let me take you home, you can go over there and bat your eyes, give him a sweet little smile, and ask him if he’ll let me join.” The idea struck you like a blow to the gut, settling in your bones and engulfing any existing thought in your brain. It seeped under your skin and into your veins like poison, diluting any healthy rationale and suffocating any moral. You had been so volatile at the thought of Jake that it had never even crossed your mind to think of that possibility. He could see it in your eyes, the flash of excitement at the suggestion. “See? I knew you didn’t mean it, trouble.” He tightened his grip on you slightly as he watched the elation deflate from your eye. He wasn’t suggesting it, he was only offering the idea to prove his point. “You want me, but you don’t want to hurt him.”

“Yeah, because the only use I have for you is sex. I’m in love with him.” You snapped, furious that he had played you in such a way.

“That’s all I wanted to hear, sweetheart.” He grinned. “But, if you do want to ask him, I don’t mind sharing.” He hummed. “I’d do anything to have you, again.”

“Fuck you,” you brushed off his comment, turning to the bartender and ordering the list of drinks that the others had requested.

“You’d like to,” he teased, paying for the order before you could even think of doing so. He gave you one last smile before grabbing two glasses from the counter and making his way over to the table. You tried to satiate the bubble of anger as you waited for the rest of your order, but it proved nearly impossible. You walked back to the table with a sour taste in your mouth and an overwhelming urge to go home. Worse than anything else, when you returned, the distant pained look in Danny’s eye made the interaction all the more disturbing. He knew, like always, and there was no way to hide it. When you looked to him, he averted his gaze towards Sam, who was sitting on the other side of him.

“I don’t know what to say, Danny!” You exploded, tears prickling your eyes. “I love you, and I want to be with you. Always have, and I’ve known that from the minute I met you.”

“I feel that way too, so I just don’t understand what’s so special about Jake! If you want to be with me, and you love me so much, why does it seem like you cling to the attention from him?” He ran a hand through his hair, not wanting to be upset with you but having no other way to express his feelings.

“If I could have it my way, I’d never speak to him again! I never wanted to, and then I started dating you and he magically appeared!” You tried to word your frustration as best you could. “I’m not trying to entertain him, but it gets a little hard to ignore him when he’s always around and doesn’t want to leave me alone!” You took a seat beside him at the table, silently begging him to look at you. “Danny, you have to know that I would never do that to you.”

“I know!” He snapped, causing you to recoil from the harshness. He finally looked up at you, remorse evident in his eyes. “I’m sorry, y/n. I know you wouldn’t.” He assured you. “Do you have feelings for him?”

“No, baby.” You reached out for his hand. It was not a lie; you did not have any romantic feelings or anything of the sorts when it came to Jake. You were attracted to him, and you knew that he knew as much. You didn’t have to remind him. “I only feel that way for you.” You assured him.

“It’s just hard, y/n. He looks at you sometimes and I wonder… I just wonder when the day will come when he finally grows up and realizes that he wants to settle down, because I know you’ll be the only person he’s looking at.”

“Jake will never grow up.” You shut that idea down, both of you quickly realizing how blasphemous it sounded. “And it doesn’t matter if he’s looking at me, because I don’t want that with him. I had feelings for him a very long time ago, and he hurt me really bad. There’s no part of me that feels like that way for him, now. I fell in love with you, and fell for a reason. I want you to know that you’re the only one who has my heart.”

Danny was fidgeting with his hands, a sure sign that he was upset. You couldn’t blame him; if it were the other way around, you would be, too. You wished you knew how to ward off Jake for good, and in turn suffocate any of the remaining sexual desires for him. You hated that amidst the struggle, Danny felt hurt enough to doubt your love for him. Of all the things that you have felt, or imagined about Jake, they didn’t hold a candle to Danny. Under the table, you reached out for his knee. You rested your palm on his leg, thumb gently running over the fabric of his jeans. You could feel him relax under your touch almost immediately. His eyes flickered towards you, seeing the sincerity in your face almost immediately. He leaned back in the booth and slipped his hand atop of yours, a silent show of affection.

You motioned your head towards the door, pleading with him for a moment alone. He nodded, standing first and allowing you to lead the way. You both headed outside, hand in hand with no regard for anyone else at the table. When you broke out onto the patio, the cool evening stung your skin. You were almost nervous to look at him, unsure of what to say. “I know you’re attracted to him, y/n. It’s not a secret.” The words weighed you down as if you were buried in cement.

“I don’t love him, Danny.”

“No, but you do feel something for him.”

“Not in any way that matters.” You took a step towards the wooden fence of the entryway. He followed, looking down at you as he took your side. “Not in any way that compares to you.”

“I know.” He assured you. “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.” He shrugged.

“I know.” You felt your chest ache at the proclamation of pain. That was something you never wanted to cause him. “I don’t know what to do. He’s… persistent.”

“Yeah, always been that way.” Danny explained. “Guess it didn’t matter as much before because I’ve never loved someone as much as I love you.” You looked to the ground, the weight of shame making it impossible for you to look at him. “Look, I’m not mad at you.” He said, his hand snaking around your waist. “I knew that this would always be an issue, but I love you enough to work through it.”

“I don’t think that’s fair, Danny.” You sighed, closing your eyes at the feeling of his touch. It was the most comforting thing to ever exist.

“Listen, you’ve never actually done anything with him, have you?”

“Of course not.” You shook your head, unable to imagine betraying him in such a way.

“He’s a dog, and I’m sure you know that. I’m not really worried that you’ll leave, or anything like that. I think maybe in the beginning I was, but I know that after this many years, if something was going to happen, it would have happened already.” He pulled you into him, allowing you to rest your head on his chest without actually having to turn to look at him. “I don’t think you slept with him and then got with me as revenge. If so, you’ve played a fantastic game.” He laughed, and you did too. “You’ve told him him to back off, and I have, too, but I don’t think he would have stuck with it if he didn’t believe there was a chance.” You closed your eyes, bracing for the impact of a breakup. You wouldn’t blame him if he did. “It’s okay to be attracted to him. You’re human, and it’s a normal human thing. I also know you enough to know that you wouldn’t have gotten with him at all if you never felt anything for him.”

“It doesn’t make it right.” You were fully willing to take blame, to understand that this was a despicable thing for you to be feeling.

“No, but what I’m saying is, I continued to date you knowing the history. Still do. You were always honest with me. You’ve never lied to me, and I respect that more than anything else. I see you two together; I know that spark is there. I’m not going to punish you for that because you’ve never tried to hide it or lie about it. It’s normal for you to be attracted to people, and it’s normal for me to be hurt about it. But I think our spark is a hell of a lot bigger, and I love you far too much to not try and work this out.” You finally felt a tear slip from your eye as you wrapped your arms around him.

“I wish I never met him. I wish I could have met you, first. I don’t want to feel this way.” Your words were muffled from your face being buried in his chest, but he got the message. He held you to him, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

“I know, and part of me does, too.” He whispered. You both sat there, holding each other in hopes that it would take all of the bad away. “I think that you need some sleep, because I can see how tired you are. We can figure out how to get through it, and I know we can, but it should be in the morning.” He said, cupping your cheek in his hand and guiding your head up to look at him. He swiped away the tears with his thumb, giving you a small smile to let you know he meant everything he said.

“I don’t deserve you.” You mumbled, completely lost in his eyes. The more you stared, the more things seemed to feel better. He was home, and he always would be. He was the love of your life, and you were more certain of that than anything else. “I’m sorry that I caused this. I wish I could go back in time and make some different decisions, maybe we wouldn’t be here.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t know you at all.” He theorized, and that was the worst thought of all. “It’s been four years, bug. We can make anything work. I know you love me, and I trust you; I always have.” he leaned down and placed a kiss on your lips, the feeling more soothing than any words shared.

“If it means I get to keep you, I’ll never look at him ever again.” You swore to it, knowing deep down that when it came to your relationship with Danny, you would go to the ends of the earth to salvage it.

“I don’t think we’ll have to go that far.” He chuckled, placing another kiss to your lips. “And you do deserve me. I know that you do, because after four years, you’ve never given in to him. If he flirted with me like that, I’m sure I would’ve cracked by now.” At the thought of it, you both dissolved into a fit of laughter. “Jake has always been Jake. I think he feels like he lost, and he never really got over it.”

“He did lose,” you laughed “if it were ever a competition between you two, he wouldn’t have even made it to the starting line.” You leaned up for another kiss as you finished, so incredibly grateful to have someone so understanding. Danny was the best in every sense of the word, and you had known that long before that night.

“I think after so long of you brushing it off and telling me it was okay, it was just routine. At first, him and I had plenty of words and none of them were polite. After a while, I saw that you could handle your own, and you always told me not to worry or fight with him. I trust you, but I probably shouldn’t have been so passive about it.” He explained. “If I ever thought he pushed it too far, or if he had made you uncomfortable, I would have killed him. Still would, actually. But you always seemed to laugh it off. Every time I mentioned it, you never seemed to care about him flirting, just about hurting me. I think we’ve all known for a long time, and I think that it just became so normal that we chose to ignore it.”

“Jake never bothered me.” You shrugged. “He’s harmless, and I know that. Think everyone else does, too. He just loves to flirt, and he loves attention. Sometimes, it’s actually kind of funny to see him try so hard and make a fool of himself. I care about Jake as a friend, and I do quite like him for company, but I guess I never wanted anyone to fight about it because I knew he could never be you. I think we all just let it go too far without talking about it.” You said, allowing your fingers to dance with his. Your eyes scanned his face, noticing how beautiful it looked in the dim moonlight. You felt stupid for ever having a shred of attraction for Jake, because Danny was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, inside and out. You had the world in your hands, and you took it for granted. “I never wanted to hurt you. I never want to hurt you. You’re the most important person in my life, and I love you with every ounce of my being.”

“I love you, and I know you love me. I know we love each other enough to make anything work.” You knew he was right, because there was nothing you wouldn’t do to keep him by your side.

“Thank you for being the best.” You whispered. “And for wanting to work it out. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I know you will.” He placed a kiss to your head. “You don’t have to thank me for anything.” You rested in his arms for a moment, and the longer you spent there, the more things seemed to look up.

“I’m gonna head home. I think I need to go to bed.” You told him, pulling back slightly.

“Do you want me to come with you?” He said, looking down at you with concern.

“No, please stay and enjoy the rest of your night. I ruined it enough already.” You shook your head. “I’m just going to take a shower and go to sleep.”

“I’d enjoy it with you, too, you know. And you didn’t ruin anything.” He told you, looking more serious than he’d ever been.

“I know, baby.” You assured him. “I’ll be okay. Go in and have a few drinks, and have fun. I’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready to come to bed.” You smiled, standing on your tip-toes to place a kiss on his cheek. “I love you.”

“I love you.” He hummed, stealing one last kiss before you made your departure. “Call me if you need me, or even if you just want to say hi.”

“You know I will.” You gave his hand one last squeeze before taking a step away. He blew you a kiss before you turned out of sight, and as always, you pretended to catch it. He only went back inside once you were out of sight.

Luckily for you, your home wasn’t too far away from the bar. You normally walked to and from work, and it was almost your favourite part of the day. It allowed you a few moments of peace, and you could decompress from any of the day’s excitement. As you made your way down the street, you felt the weight on your shoulders lift. You felt better knowing that Danny was aware Jake was no more than a guilty pleasure, and that he was the love of your life. Part of you still felt dirty for even feeling as such, but the knowledge that you were both willing to work through it was more important than anything else. As you tumbled up your porch stairs, you wasted no time unlocking the door and bustling inside. You were eager for a shower to wash the stress of the day off, and your stomach was begging you for a bite to eat.

You kicked your shoes off and immediately went to the kitchen. You rustled around in the fridge before you found leftovers from last night’s dinner. As you warmed it up, you unbuttoned your jeans and slipped out of them. You placed them on the back of a chair and made a mental note to throw them in the laundry basket later. You ate in silence, enjoying the sound of nothing after hearing the constant buzz of a bar for hours on end. You threw your dishes in the sink and made your way upstairs to the bathroom. After you showered, you felt like a brand new person. You took extra time to do your skincare routine, and blow dried your hair before climbing into bed. The sheets were welcoming, still lingering with the scent of Danny’s cologne. When you nestled your head in the pillows, you were surrounded by the smell of his shampoo. It was the epitome of comfort, and you wished you never had to leave. It didn’t take too long until your eyes grew heavy, and the thought of sleep was too tempting to resist. You pulled the blankets up to your chin and drifted off into a slumber.

When you woke, it was still dark outside and the bed was still very much empty. You thought it was strange, figuring Danny would be back and asleep long before then. You rubbed your eyes, looking to the alarm clock on your beside and noticing that it was well into the night, now. You figured that Danny was the safest with his brothers, and you need not worry about someone over a foot taller and much stronger than you. You were about to close your eyes and fall back to sleep, but you heard the distant shutting of a door and muted chatter. Danny must have invited the boys over, which he so often did. You figured now that he was home safe, you could sleep soundly.

You settled back into the pillows, lax against the mattress and welcoming of any slumber that was willing to come to you. The sound of the same chatter began to fill the hallway, striking you as something even more strange. If you were sleeping, Danny aimed to keep the house as quiet as possible. It was unlike him to be speaking so loudly, especially so close to the bedroom. You sat up again, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Before you could even think to speak, or stand and confront the disturbance, the door of the bedroom creaked open. The chatter was obsolete, now, and the hallway light pooled in through the opening. You saw Danny, immediately prompting a smile on your face. Once he saw you were awake, he took a step inside. “Hi baby.” You crooned, excited that he was home. He didn’t respond, just took another step further into the room.

Behind him was another body, one that you couldn’t recognize through the darkness. When he turned and the flash of light reflected off the walls just right, your stomach dropped. “Hello, trouble.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“What’s…. What’s up?” You looked between the two boys, unsure of how to react to the situation.

“Mind if we turn a light on?” Jake asked. “Hard to see your beautiful face when it’s so dark in here.” The words settled in the pit of your stomach, making you unable to form a coherent response. Even in the simplicity of the statement, the tone of his voice alone sent a rush of arousal straight to your core. You were too close to sleep to have any inkling of right or wrong.

“Y-yeah,” you stuttered, looking to your boyfriend for an answer. Even in the minimal light, you could sense an air of mischief on his features. You shuffled around, searching blindly for the lamp on your nightstand. Once you located the switch, you flicked it on. A soft yellow hue decorated the walls, illuminating both boys in all of their beauty. “Better?”

“Much.” Jake smiled, but it was all but genuine. You weren’t sure if you were in a dream, mind crazed from the days whirlwind of events and fabricating some sort of twisted narrative that you wished was real. Although you seemed awake, the haze of dream and imagination nowhere in sight, the situation seemed too odd to be true. You watched the two, curious as to what they were doing, and even more so about what they were thinking. If you were in reality, they were acting more out of character than they ever had before. “Did you get some sleep, sweetheart?” Jake questioned, eyes lingering everywhere except for your own. He looked as if he was already imagining what lie beneath the mountain of blankets.

“Yeah,” you nodded, figuring the best way to find out what was happening was to play along.

“That’s good,” Jake nodded, looking to his counterpart. “You’re definitely going to need it. Long night ahead.” He gave another smile, but this one radiated excitement. You looked to Danny, silently pleading with him for an answer.

“What?” Danny asked, tone only moderately harsh. You could tell the softness was dancing behind his eyes, waiting to be seen. “Isn’t this exactly what you wanted?” He took a step towards the bed.

“What is this?” You pried, unable to answer without more information.

“Come on, sweetheart. You’re smarter than that.” Jake urged you to answer your own question. You looked between them, studying each of their expressions for a moment. When you did, your eyes widened, mouth slightly agape in shock. You recognized both expressions far too well, and one was something you hadn’t seen in a very long time. “There you go.” Jake gave the small utter of praise, happy you were on the same page.

“I figured if you want him so bad, I’ll let you have him, but I’ve gotta have my fun, too.” Danny murmured, also looking at you with a hunger in his eyes you had only seen a few times. You were gazing at him in wonder, as if he’d given you the gift of life, unable to imagine a better way to rid yourself of the horrendous things you were feeling about Jake. “That sound okay to you, baby?” He asked, moving to your side. He looked down at you, the streak of dominance that he had a tendency for was incredibly apparent. As he waited for a reply, there was no doubt in your mind that he was more than serious. It was grievous, the fire dancing in his pupils. There would be no backtalk, no bargaining, nothing of the sorts. He was kind enough to let you have a taste of your own guilty pleasure, but it was under his authority. He was in charge, and you didn’t have the power to be anything other than obedient.

“Yes, daddy.” You spoke, in utter awe of the power he had over you. Jake looked to Danny, his expression showing nothing short of elation at the sound of your words. Danny took a glance over at him, a small smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. You could smell the alcohol from both of them, understanding that within their drunk ramblings, you must have came up in conversation. In attempt to settle the score, this was their conclusion.

“I told you.” Was all he said.

“Told him what?” You squeaked, almost embarrassed at your own willingness to submit to him.

“I told him all about you, baby.” He assured you. “Told him how well you listen, and all about how much of a whore you can be.” The ache between your legs was growing more intense by the second, still unable to comprehend the situation you had found yourself in. “But he’d know all about that, wouldn’t he?” His comment was snide, but you didn’t let it bother you. Your eyes flickered to Jake, a nervous jitter rushing through you. You were quite familiar with Danny’s character, and when the whole thing was over, he would go right back to the sweet boy you saw most of the time. He reached out, grabbing your chin in his hand and guiding you to look back at him. “I’m talking to you, not him.”

“Y-yes,” you nodded, agreeing with his statement. “He does.” You felt no shame in it, now. What was usually the elephant in the room was now nothing more than a driving force for the nights events.

“It was so good that you’re still thinking about it, yeah?” You nodded against the force of his hand, a small noise of confirmation sounding from your chest. “Better than I can make you feel?” He raised an eyebrow, but in no way were you willing to engage in his trap with both of them holding so much authority over you. “He’s going to get you off, and then we’ll see if you can give me an answer.” Your cheeks burned red, now nervous at the thought. You knew that Danny and Jake had likely discussed this in depth before coming home to you, but you weren’t sure if Danny really knew what he was getting himself into.

“I-I don’t-“

“What?” He snapped. “Been inviting him in for years, but now you’re too shy?” He taunted. “All talk, no action?” He could see the spark of indignation in your eye, happy that he’d pressed the right button. “Don’t worry, I’ll get my turn, too. So, you just keep your mouth shut and do as you’re fucking told.” He said, no debate about the matter.

“Okay,” you agreed, eyes never once straying from him. Although you had desperately wanted a moment like this with Jake, you still seemed to be plagued with guilt over the matter even with Danny’s explicit permission. He noticed it in your eyes as he moved to sit on the chair you had placed beside the bed. When you put it there for the intent of reading, you surely never thought it would be used for such a vulgar showing.

“It’s okay.” He assured you, his tone much softer than it was a moment before. “I’m okay.” You were both locked in a staring contest, but as he uttered the profession of comfortability, your worried gazed turned into a silent profession of love. Under the hard exterior, he let a loving smile peek through. You let out an exhale, content with knowing he was okay. With that, you turned to look at Jake, unable to deny the flutter of excitement in your belly. When he saw the hopeful gleam in your eyes, he couldn’t help but smile down at you, too.

“Never thought I’d get to see you like this again, trouble.” He stated, taking a step towards the edge of the bed. You sat patiently, waiting for an order from him. Although long ago, your night spent with him left you aware of his love for control, too. “Are you going to be good for me, too? Listen to me just like you do for him?”

“Yes, sir.” You nodded, entranced by the thought of him touching you again. He took a deep breath, the sound of the words washing over him like a shower of relief. He was more than thrilled that you had remembered him so well, thrilled that after so many years the experience for you was still so memorable in your mind.

“Come here, angel.” He beckoned you towards him, expecting immediate action. You slipped out from under the blanket, rising to your knees and moving towards him on the bed. When you were within arms reach, he cupped your cheek in his hand, peering down at you with adoration. He wasn’t shy to admit that he was elated to have you again. As much as his tirade was about mischief, the need to make you admit you wanted him, it also had a lot to do with his own need for you. He leaned down, wasting no time in pulling you into a kiss. It was hungry, desperate to make up for years of abstaining from the feeling. His other hand found your hip, fingers inching under the t-shirt that was covering you.

The sensation was unexplainable, the pleasure derived just from kissing him was overwhelming. Paired with the feeling of his hands on your skin, it was driving you insane. He used his wrist to hold up the fabric as his palm drifted towards your ass, he let his hand rest there, the cool metal of his ring he adorned on his finger sending a shiver through you. His grip was tight and showcased exactly how excited he was for the ability to have you again. He broke from you but didn’t move too far away. His nose was still ghosting over yours, almost as if he was scared you would disappear if he moved too far away. “Seems like you were waiting for us,” he noted, his finger slipping under the thin material of your underwear. “Were you hoping that we would come and take care of you?” He cooed, his sympathy clearly false as his lips drifted towards your jaw.

“G-god yes,” you let out a shaky sigh as his lips ghosted over your neck. He was making it a point to show you how well he remembered the sensitive spots, finding them with ease in hopes you might let a moan slip past your lips. He’d been yearning to hear it for so long that he wasn’t sure he could wait any longer.

“Let me take this off, angel.” He hummed, letting his hands snake under your shirt. As if the realization truly hit you as to what you were doing, you froze at the request, quickly looking to Danny with a hint of panic in your eye.

“It’s okay, baby.” He said, noticing your worry. He was sitting in the chair, observing the sight without a worry in the world. “This was my idea. I’ll tell you if I’m uncomfortable.” He said, hoping to crush your fear once and for all.

“Let me take care of you,” Jake said, also attempting to ease your worry. You looked back to him, giving a slight nod. With that, you allowed him to slip your shirt over your head. The cool air hit you immediately, but Jake was quick with his hands to warm you back up. His thumb brushed over your nipple, the light touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. “Do you know how long I’ve waited to see you like this?” He asked, taking a moment to admire the sight before him. You bit the inside of your lip, nervous about being on display for both boys at once. “It was terrible, only being able to dream about it.” He muttered, leaning forward for another kiss. Perhaps it was because of the incessant need for him that had been eating away at you for months, or maybe because you were finally realizing that he wanted you just as bad, but you were a mess before he even took your clothes off, and you were desperate for him to keep going. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, gently biting down as his hand continued to explore your breast. The friction from the pad of his thumb was delightful, even if he was barely touching you. You let a small moan slip into his mouth, immediately sending him into euphoria.

“Did you miss me?” His fingers trailed down your torso, ticking the skin as he familiarized himself with you.

“Yeah,” you admitted, all sense of shame disappearing long ago. He moved back slightly, ridding himself of his shirt.

“Let’s get rid of these, okay?” His fingers slid under the side of your underwear, pulling it back and releasing his hold so it snapped back against your skin. You nodded, laying back on the bed and removing the flimsy fabric from your body. Jake moved towards the side of the bed, casting a sideways glance at Danny as he did so. “If you ask him nicely, do you think he’d give us some alone time?” Jake smirked, raising an eyebrow at you as he asked. “You always seem to get your way.”

“Watch it.” Danny warned, clearly not a fan of his joke.

“Just thought I’d try.” Jake said, brushing off the harsh reaction.

“Can’t perform under pressure?” The snide comment was used for show, Danny making it a point to let Jake know that he was not the one in charge of the situation.

“Feeling left out, Daniel?” Jake asked as he undid his belt buckle. “Jealous, maybe?”

“Haven’t really seen anything to be concerned about, yet.” The argument only proved that Jake was invited over solely for the sake of you. After four years of strictly monogamous dating, Danny never seemed to have an interest in sharing you with anybody. You knew he would never do anything that would put a strain on your relationship, or anything that he was blatantly uncomfortable with, but you were certain he was likely struggling a little bit with the situation. When you turned to look at him again, his eyes didn’t seem angry at all; he was relaxed, sitting as if this was a normal occurrence. You realized then that Danny wasn’t worried at all about competing with Jake, because he knew there was no need. He just wanted Jake to know that the situation was reliant on his generosity, and he could put an end to it if he wanted to do so.

When you looked back, the comment seemed to spark a flame in Jake’s eyes. One that spoke loudly about his love of competitive sport, and to him, this was exactly what the situation was. He opted not to respond, instead climbing into bed on the opposite side of you, ensuring Danny had a perfect view of what was coming next. You watched your boyfriend for a moment, searching for any signs of discomfort, but he was perfectly pleased with watching you fulfill your fantasy. You assumed it was because he knew that Jake would only have you for a moment, and he was promised a lifetime. Danny was never one for jealousy, and it was evident that not even in this situation did it bother him. The conversation you both shared earlier had allowed him to settle any fear and open his mind to possibility. Jake and Danny had shared an in depth discussion before even uttering the idea of him joining Danny. Rules, boundaries, and the knowledge that if someone was uncomfortable at any point, it would be over. The harmless banter was inevitable, but they were both on the same page; they were in it to please you, and that was it.

Jakes hand slipped between your legs, his fingers immediately running through your folds to gather the arousal he’d been causing you. As if it was something he did so often, something he knew so well, his fingers immediately found your clit. He traced circles into the sensitive bud, sending a rush of emotion through you. It had been so long that you had almost forgotten how fantastic it felt to be touched by him. He kept the pressure light, but his motion steady. He barely had to do anything to pry a moan from your lips. “Just like that?” He asked, looking over your face with a distant longing behind his eyes. “Does that feel good?”

“So good,” you breathed, eyes fluttering closed. You could feel his erection strained against his jeans, begging for any type of relief. You were eager to touch him, almost more so than you were for him to touch you. From what you remembered, Jake was not one to take things slow, but you wondered if he was pacing himself in fear of crossing any boundaries. He had spent years pining after you, always being shot down and eventually he had to understand that he would never get an opportunity to be with you again. Now that you were here, with his hands on you, and his name rolling so beautifully from your tongue, he wanted to savour it.

He increased the pressure, gaze never faltering in hopes to sear the memory into his brain forever. You let a gasp out, your hips raising from the bed to meet the movement of his thumb. He gave you a small smile, content at the reaction. “Give him a show, sweetheart. Make some noise, thank him for being so kind.” Jake purred, eyes flickering up to Danny for a moment. Your eyes followed the same direction, catching your boyfriends gaze just as Jake slipped a finger inside you. You held his stare, feeling a moan rise in your throat. You weren’t sure if it was from Jakes movement, or the carnal desire that was written all over Danny’s face. His jaw was hard set, chest heaving with his breath, but his eyes were not angry; they were half-lidded, clouded with enjoyment from the sight.

Jake gave a slight curl of his fingers as he began pumping them into you, his thumb drifting over your clit each time. The feeling was intense, only made worse when he leaned down to pull your nipple into his mouth. Your pleasure was impossible to hide, the work Jake was doing was intensified because you had the opportunity to watch Danny. With his eyes locked with yours, you felt a great need to reach out and touch him. You thought he looked quite lonely, and you were overwhelmed with the desire to have him, too. He noticed the look you were giving him, quite elated at the knowledge you still wanted him even with Jake so accessible to you. You saw him palm himself through his jeans, clearly worked up and desperate for relief, too.

Jake let his teeth sink into your nipple, just slight enough to catch you off guard. Although he would never admit it, he did feel a spark of jealousy upon noticing your disengagement from his actions. He sped his fingers, pulling you back into a cloud of euphoria. Your eyes fluttered closed, your head resting back on the pillow as your mind swirled with the threat of an orgasm. Abruptly, he stopped his movements, violently tearing you away from the dream-like state. You turned to look at him, barely catching his eye before he was slinking downwards on the bed. He settled between your legs, guiding one over his shoulder. You let a sigh of delight out as he brought his mouth to your cunt, running his tongue through you to get a taste of his own hard work.

“F-fuck,” you gasped, his tongue making quick work at circling your clit. Your hand instinctively reached for his hair, fingers tangling in the roots and giving a slight tug every time he hit a particularly pleasant spot. He added his fingers to you, resuming his earlier pace. You were thrown into a whole new dimension of bliss, already close to a climax with little effort. His tongue was just as devilish as his personality; every move was calculated, aimed for maximum impact. He was desperate to get you to an orgasm, needing it more than he needed water to survive. His own enjoyment was almost overshadowing yours, every now and again he would let out a moan against you just to show you how happy he was to be of service to you. “Jake, m’gonna cum.” You warned.

“Look at me.” Danny spoke, now. The order ran through you, his voice sending a new type of pleasure through you. You let your head fall to the side, more than willing to follow the order. The look of longing in his eyes was stronger than you’d ever seen from him before. It was strong enough that it immediately sent you over the edge upon noticing it. Your climax hit you hard, all of your muscles tensing as you let out a slur of moans and curses. The walls were decorated with your sounds of pleasure, the memory sinking into the foundation with intent to stay forever. The obscene display was almost too much for Danny to sit through, his need for you too great to be ignored.

“Taste even better than I remember, sweetheart.” Jake’s voice echoed in your ears, but you were too far gone to cognitively understand what he was saying. You barely had time to come down before Danny was on his feet, barking an order at Jake to get up.

Your head was spinning, trying to focus on something other than the residual energy of your orgasm pulsing through you. At Danny’s request, Jake stood without argument. Your orgasm was glistening on his chin, adorned like a trophy of his most proudest moment. Without another word, Danny stripped himself of his clothes and took the position that Jake had previously held. He wasted no time, immediately placing soft kisses to the inside of your thighs in attempt to convey his love for you. Danny was not jealous of Jake because he was pleasuring you; he was just eager to do it himself. “I told you I’d get my turn, baby.” He mumbled, lips still ghosting over your skin. Jake was watching you, almost seeming unsure of what to do with himself. “Do you want me, beautiful?” His fingertips grazed the outside of your thighs, selling on your hips in a firm hold.

“Yeah,” You nodded, reaching out to cup his cheek with your hand. You let your thumb drift over his cheek, showcasing the love you had for him in the small gesture. He turned his head slightly, placing a kiss to the pad of your thumb.

“I want to hear how bad you want it,” he muttered, his voice low and his order clear.

“Please, daddy. I need you. I need you so bad.” Your shameless begging was put to good use, as usual. Danny was always willing to give you what you wanted, but there was a few things he liked hearing. You were never one to deprive him of his desires, mostly because they were few and far between. He let out a hum of satisfaction, pleased at the sound of your words.

“Okay, baby.” He sighed, as if your begging was tireless and brutal. He was so quick to give in to you that it even bothered him, sometimes. “You know I’ll always give you what you want.” He was inches away from you now, so close that it was near painful to wait any longer. “But you have to take care of him, too, since he was so good to you.” Without looking up, Danny nodded his head towards Jake. The thought was thrilling, to be used by both boys however they wished. You thought that there was no better idea in the world. Your eyes fluttered towards Jake, looking expectedly at him, as if you were waiting for him to tell you what he wanted. The expression was crippling for him, the innocent aura engraved into your face tainted with your willingness to do whatever he pleased. “Show him what a good little whore you can be.”

“Yes, sir.” You breathed, nearly vibrating with excitement at the thought of Jake taking the rest of his clothes off.

“She always been this obedient?” Jake asked, a hint of humour in his tone.

“Took a while,” you could hear the smirk in Danny’s voice without even looking at him. “But I think it paid off.” You bit the inside of your lip, holding back any snide comments you wanted to convey about his jabs. You knew better, and in truth, he wasn’t lying. It was very rare for you to talk back in the bedroom, and even more so for you to contest his authority in any way. Danny was so kind and catering in every aspect of every day life, but during sex, his kindness was limited and his word was final. You learned quite quickly that if you chose to challenge him, it only made it harder for you to get what you wanted.

Jake hummed an agreement, an unspoken praise for Danny’s work. As he unbuttoned his jeans, Danny prompted you to shift closer to the edge of the bed. Jake kicked the rest of his clothes to the side, uncaring about where they landed. The sight of him naked began to form another knot in your belly, promoted without any touching at all. Jake was gorgeous, and it seemed like he had only gotten more so over the years. “Open,” he commanded, stepping closer to you. You did as he asked, turning your head to the side and opening your mouth, welcoming him to do as he wished. At the same time, Danny lowered his mouth to your cunt, resuming what Jake had been doing earlier. Jake wasted no time thrusting into your mouth, immediately letting out a hiss of pleasure. He started at a slow pace, not wanting to push you too far too soon. You let out a moan, muffled by his cock in your mouth. It was your way of telling both boys you were more than content with the current situation.

Danny slipped his fingers into you, curling them to hit the spot he’d grown so familiar with. Jake was phenomenal, but it was no comparison to your boyfriend. He had spent nearly half a decade memorizing every like and dislike, and undoubtedly had the power to bring you to an orgasm in seconds. Both sensations were equally intense, Danny’s tongue was focused intently on your clit and sending waves of pleasure through you, while the knowledge of pleasuring Jake was euphoric all on its own. Jake let out a groan, unashamedly admitting his enjoyment as he began to move his hips a bit faster. You closed your eyes, aiming to keep your breathing steady and your body relaxed.

“Fuck, y/n.” Jake hissed, his head falling back as he spoke. “Look so pretty with my cock in your mouth.” His words sent another rush of arousal through you, seeing every nerve on fire. The praise was heavenly, so good that you realized you could survive off the sound alone. The position you found yourself in was more than just unexpected, but something you never would have imagined possible. Although your processing of the information was difficult, it was incredibly welcomed. Just because you had never thought it possible did not mean you hadn’t dreamed of it a time or two. You almost felt in debt with Danny, knowing that his permission and kindness had given you something so fantastic. You weren’t sure if you could ever thank him enough.

You let out another strangled moan as Danny’s fingers hit the perfect spot, sending another wave of pleasure throughout your body. Paired with the feeling of his tongue, you were dangerously close to the edge once more. You couldn’t verbally warn him, but he knew the signs all too well. His fingers were searing into your hips, holding you to him as he let out a hum, just to let you know that he knew you were close. It was a permissive gesture; he had no intention of stopping or withholding anything from you. Jake was lost in his own world, barely able to comprehend the feeling of fucking you again, even if it was only your mouth. He was hoping you would finish soon, just so he wouldn’t have to pull away first. Danny felt you tense under his hold, now speeding his movements in hopes to bring you to an orgasm. Although he didn’t find himself jealous that Jake was touching you, he did find himself envious that he wasn’t the one behind the moans falling from your lips. He was eager to please you, wanting the gratification of your orgasm like he needed it to survive.

“Are you gonna cum, angel?” Jake managed the words out through gritted teeth, still blissfully lost in the feeling of your mouth. You looked up to him, both of you knowing that you couldn’t respond. He smiled down at you, liking it much better that way. Instead of tormenting you further, he continued to fuck your mouth so you couldn’t get the chance to speak. You watched his face, in awe at the beauty of his expression. Although the scene was far from graceful, he managed to encase gracefulness despite the lack of it within the room. You felt the knot in your belly tighten to a point of no return, and without further warning, another orgasm washed over you. Your muscles tensed as your eyes squeezed shut, and your moans, although silenced, filled the room. Both boys were elated at your performance and were more than ready to move on to the main event.

Jake pulled back from you, letting out a sigh of discontent at the loss of the feeling. “Good to know that you can use your mouth for more than just back talk.” His voice was hoarse, strained by his own need for you. He was eager to fuck you, so much so that he wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait.

“You want him to fuck you now, baby?” Danny asked, mouth still hovering over your cunt. If he could have his way, he’d stay between your legs all night. If it were any normal day, he would have. Your eyes flickered towards him, unsure of how to answer. “It’s okay, you can say it.” His gruff tone made him seem more confident than he truly was; in fact, this was the part he had been dreading all night. Everything that had happened so far was fine, and he was more than willing to admit that he didn’t mind sharing you at all. In the previous context, at least. He’d been struggling with the idea of Jake fucking you, and he was nervous about the possibility of you enjoying it more than you enjoyed him.

“C-can…” you trailed off, looking between them both. You were anxious to speak, not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings. That was the last thing you wanted to do, especially after both of them being so good to you.

“It’s okay,” Jake said, joining in on the conversation. “Whatever you want.” You nodded, knowing that it was likely painful for him to say that. It was vicious, Jake’s need for control in the bedroom. You’d only been with him once, but you remembered it well. For Jake to take the lowest rung of the ladder and realize he had the least important opinion was likely very hard for him to comply with. But it didn’t seem like he had any disdain on his face, nor any trouble with accepting it. In truth, it didn’t bother him at all. He was just elated to be there.

“Can you fuck me?” You asked Danny, a hopeful gleam in your eye. His fear of being obsolete was diminished within a second, the question settling over him like a warm embrace.

“That’s what you want, sweet girl?” He crooned, fighting back a grin.

“Yes, please.” You assured him, the corner of your lips turning upward into a soft smile.

“We can do that,” Danny breathed, rising to his knees. “Come here.” He held his hand out for you. You took it, making a move to sit up. You shuffled to your knees and he immediately brought his hands to you, fingers dusting across your skin as he pulled you into a kiss. He was ecstatic at your question, but he didn’t have to say it for you to know. He was worried that you would rather fuck Jake, but the whole ordeal had only seemed to make you fall in love with him more. He was a phenomenal partner, one that loved with his entire heart and soul. You had nothing to ever complain or worry about with him, and the fact that he was willing to potentially risk his own comfort to give you something you wanted was something you could never expect from him. But, he had done it valiantly and with no hesitation, and he seemed to be enjoying it, too. Your guilty pleasure had opened your relationship to a whole new world of possibilities.

He pulled away, moving to the other side of the bed. “Come here,” he beckoned you towards him. You didn’t need instruction to know what he wanted from you. You kneeled in front of him with your back to him. You placed your palms on the edge of the bed, giddy with excitement. His hands took to your waist, and you looked up a Jake with a hopeful expression. The look alone could have sent him to his knees. “Are you going to be good for us, baby?” Danny asked, lining himself up with your entrance.

“Yes, daddy.” You were quick with a response, eager to continue. “So good, I promise.”

“That’s my girl,” his words came out in more of a growl. Jake took a step towards the bed, gently grabbing your face in his hands.

“You tap my leg if you want to stop.” His order was firm. “Even if you just want me to slow down. I want you to be comfortable.” His eyes showed heaps of concern as he spoke. You barely knew Jake to be caring, but perhaps in the years of lusting after you, he had grown quite fond of you. You thought it would be hard not to, even if you were a heartless creature. You wouldn’t describe Jake as heartless, but definitely careless. His affection was much different than a typical persons, but it was still phenomenal, nonetheless.

“Yes, sir.” The words sent a shiver down his spine, thrilled at the thought of fucking you again. He didn’t even care about penetration; he was more than content with the idea of your mouth for the rest of his life. Danny and Jake shared a look, both agreeing that they could continue. Without any further hesitation, Danny pushed himself into you. You let out a groan, already overwhelmed by the feeling. You didn’t have time to think much about it, because Jake had snaked his hand toward the back of your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair. He held your head in place as he brought his hips forward, resting the tip of his cock on your lips as he waited for you to open your mouth. You didn’t make him wait; your lips fell open, an invitation for him to continue as he pleased.

Danny started slow, his thrusts steady but not powerful. Jake was the same, both of them wanting you to get used to the feeling before pushing you any further. Their caution was endearing, but you were too far gone to care for it. You pushed yourself back on Danny, a silent show of your desire for more. A fire flashed in his eyes, the movement sending him into a state of ferocity. His grip on you tightened, and the power behind his hips increased. You let out a moan, the tip of his cock slamming against your cervix as he fucked you. The vibration from your moan sparked the same reaction in Jake. Both boys quickly realized that you were perfectly happy being used by them, and they were happy to utilize it. Jake held your head steady as he set a pace with his own hips, the first moment of sweetness quickly replaced by primal desire.

Jake hit the back of your throat, the feeling coming as a shock to you. Your throat constricted around him as you fought back a gag, but it only drove him further. Danny was lost in you, unable to find any more worry. He brought his hand up and landed it with a sharp smack on your ass. The lingering sting from the impact was irritating, but pleasurable all at once. Your fists were gripping the edge of the mattress, holding on tightly as you bounced back and fourth between the two. “Such a good little whore,” Jake hissed, his grip in your hair tightening further. “God, you take it so well.”

“Feel so fucking good, baby.” Danny agreed, the praise from both sides almost too much to bear. Danny reached around your waist, bringing his fingers to your already sensitive clit. He traced circles as he fucked into you, holding you firmly with his other hand so you could keep your balance. The speed at which Jake was thrusting into your mouth was almost too much to keep up with, but the beautiful sounds that he was singing were all the motivation you needed to keep up with him. Tears were stinging your eyes, falling and making a mess on your cheeks. Every so often, the urge to gag was too strong to hold back, but you persevered mostly because of the pleasure you were receiving from your boyfriend. Your skin was tingling with the threat of another climax. The release you needed was urgent, but you had no way to express it to him. Instead, you let out a slur of muffled noises in hopes that he would recognize the message.

Thankfully, Danny knew you well enough to recognize any message you were trying to convey; he could read you like a book, even in his sleep. “Cum for us, baby.” He demanded, but he was pleading with you. He couldn’t keep up the pace much longer either. His own orgasm was close, too. Jake was on the same page, noticing the state of both of you and recognizing it was similar to his own.

“Cum all over his cock, angel. Show him how good it feels.” Jake joined in on the fun of encouraging you. They had stopped viewing the night as a competition, and rather as a team effort. His words settled in your stomach like iron, the weight too heavy to withstand. He slowed his hips slightly, respectful enough to let Danny take over for a moment. Danny noticed his withdrawal, taking the opportunity to pull you back on him. As he did so, Jake pulled out of you entirely, wanting to give you two the moment of intimacy. Now, with the freedom of your voice, you let out a cry of pleasure. The moan tore through your chest, coating the walls like an obscene decoration.

“Fuck, Danny.” You croaked, unable to find the energy for anything more than that. Within seconds, you descended into another orgasm. Your limbs were trembling, threatening to give out from underneath you. Danny held you up, making sure you knew you were secure as you rode out the high. When the intensity began to fade, he slowly withdrew from you. His chest was heaving, but less from lack of oxygen and more from his carnal need for you. He caught eyes with Jake, sharing a silent thank you for his kindness in letting you two share each other for a moment.

“His turn, baby.” He spoke lowly, now understanding that he would be more than selfish to deprive Jake of an experience like that. His fear was satiated, no more anxiety about losing you or being forgotten. He was aware that there was never a need for the worry to begin with, but your performance and enjoyment spoke louder than any verbal reassurance. Jake looked to Danny as if he granted him the opportunity of a lifetime. Before anyone moved, Danny quickly glanced towards the table by your bedside. He moved towards it, rummaging through the drawer before finding a condom. He flashed it towards Jake, who reached for it with no hesitation. You were all under the same knowledge that Danny called the shots, and you were both more than willing to comply.

Jake slipped on the condom, immediately taking to you to help you stand. With his assistance, you steadied yourself on your feet. He guided your chin upwards and brought you into a kiss. Your hands landed on him, holding him to you in hopes the moment would never have to end. Years worth of pent up frustration and desire was all fizzling away to a dramatic end. When you had imagined the lifetime of torment to be over, you never thought it would be in such a fantastic way. No guilt, nor shame. It was the best possible outcome for a normally grievous situation. He parted from you, but ultimately leaned in for one more kiss. The temptation was too hard to resist. Once he managed to will himself away from you, he took a seat on the edge of the bed.

Danny moved to join you both, standing in front of you in anticipation for the next move. Jake guided you backwards towards him, slowly bringing you down to meet him on the bed. He lined himself up with you and used a hand on your shoulder to pull you down on him. Immediately, he let out a sigh of satisfaction. He had no way to express his gratitude for being granted the opportunity to have you again, so he opted to show you, instead. He used his hands on your hips to set a pace, prompting you to eventually take over. “That’s it, angel.” His mouth was just next to your ear, his breath tickling your neck. “Waited so fucking long for this.” He purred, happy when you continued to grind your hips down on him. “Be good for him, sweetheart. Treat him the same way you did for me.” He ordered, placing a kiss to your shoulder. “He’s been so good to you, letting you be a little slut. Thank him for it.” He let his teeth sink into the same spot his lips were kissing you.

The position was much more gentle than the last, allowing you to recover from the roughness. You looked up to Danny, giving him a smile that was all but sexual. It was your way of saying I love you without having to speak it. Your eyes told him all he needed to know. Danny brought his hand to your face, wiping away any tears still littering your skin. He gave you the same smile, both of you caught in a wordless conversation that was dripping with affection. Jake slipped his one of his hands to your front, fingers settling on your clit. He traced slow circles, causing a whimper to fall from your lips. His other hand came up to your throat, his fingers wrapping around it like a snake going in for a kill. You gave Danny a few innocent bats of your eyelashes, inviting him in with vulgar intent. You opened your mouth as Jake’s grip on your neck tightened. Danny moved forward, and you bent down slightly to meet him.

Danny let you set the pace, understanding that as bad as he wanted you, there was a lot of stimulation on you. You brought him into your mouth as you moved your hips on Jake. You took him as far as you could, feeling him slide down your throat. The pressure from Jake’s hand made it all the more pleasurable for Danny, the already constrained space becoming all the more apparent. Danny let out a groan as you bobbed your head down on him, gradually increasing your speed as you worked. Jakes fingers were working tirelessly at your clit, his own moans filling the air as you came down on him. He had his forehead rested on your back, eyes screwed shut in pleasure as he attempted focus his attention to his hands.

Jake shifted slightly underneath you, allowing him to reach a little deeper into you as you gyrated your hips. The new sensation caused a moan to tear through you. The vibration caused a stutter in Danny’s slow movements, the sensation almost bringing him to an orgasm. All three of you were desperate for a release, but both boys were aching for relief. As much as they loved pleasuring you, they were dangerously close to the edge. Your head was swimming, swirling with lack of blood-flow, which only made the pleasure all the more intense. Jake could feel you tense against him, your walls constructing around him, the feeling sending him into a frenzy. He let out a raspy moan, the sound shooting through you as motivation. You had never once imagined Jake could sound so desperate, so needy for someone or something. To know that it was for you was one of the best feelings in the world. His fingers tightened around your neck once more, the blood supply cut off completely. Danny took it upon himself to pick up his own pace, a slur of curses falling from his mouth at the tightness of your throat.

Without warning, another orgasm took hold, seizing every inch of your body. You wanted to cry out, to scream in response to the overwhelming amount of pleasure, but it was as if your brain short circuited. You couldn’t focus on a single thought; you were completely lost within both of them. Jake let out a growl, finding it near impossible to stop himself from orgasming at the sight of the state you were in. He held on just long enough for you to regain your mind, and he loosened his hold on your neck. Danny pulled back, also dangerously close to cumming. The two boys looked at each other, sharing one single coherent thought. They had no idea how they were going to end the night, and they weren’t sure if they even wanted to.

“What do you want, angel?” Jake said, holding your hips so you wouldn’t continue your movements. “How do you want us to finish?” Danny was appreciative that Jake asked, because they both knew it was in their best interest for you to decide. You lifted your head, a mess of spit decorating your chin and more tears prickling your eyes. You looked exhausted, barely able to hold yourself up, but you knew you wanted them to finish, and you knew exactly how to do it.

“I want…” you trailed off, taking a long inhale to slow the spinning in your head. “I want you both.” The boys shared a look, wide eyed and in shock at the idea.

“B-both of us?” Danny stuttered, unsure if he heard you right. “Like, to fuck you?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, unable to speak from the sheer excitement of the thought.

“Are you sure, trouble?” Jake’s comment proved that he had been yanked out of the cloud of sex, his rationality returning to him momentarily. “Don’t do it just because you think that’s what we want.”

“Im sure,” you nodded “that’s what I want.” A rush of excitement ran through both of them as they glanced at each other. Danny immediately went back to the night table, grabbing a bottle of lube from the drawer. With a small smirk on his lips, he tossed it to Jake.

“You heard her.” He said, knowing that you would never suggest it if you weren’t comfortable.

“Has she… I mean, have you?” Jake asked, still processing the request. Danny gave him a nod, answering any questions that he had with one swift motion. As if he wasn’t shocked enough, the thought settled in his bones like lead. After a few seconds, a smirk began to grow on his lips, too. “Kinky little thing,” he noted “sounds like I really missed out.” Danny’s apprehension of Jake’s smart comments had completely disappeared. This time, he found his words almost comedic. Jake helped you to your feet once more, immediately prompting you into Danny’s arms. “Guess we have to give the lady what she wants.”

Danny leaned down, placing a kiss to your lips. As he did so, he placed his hands on the back of your thighs and scooped you up as he straightened his back. You instinctively wrapped your legs around him, holding on to his arms for support. Jake moved closer, his chest pressing against your back. You leaned into him, accepting his presence with warm welcome. “I’m going to go slow, okay? Tell me if you’re uncomfortable.” He explained. You gave a nod, already aware of the process. After four years, you and Danny had grown quite experimental in the bedroom. The only shock was that it was somebody other than him doing it. Jake placed a few kisses to your exposed neck, starting his exploration with his hand. He started with his finger, slow and cautious in fear of making you uncomfortable. The feeling was new, something you didn’t experience all that often, but it was enjoyable. You let out a whimper, closing your eyes and eager for him to continue. Jake locked eyes with Danny, both sharing a silent agreement of comfortability.

With Jake’s support, Danny slipped his arms under your thighs as you leaned back into Jake. When Jake felt you were comfortable enough, he moved his hand to allow himself access to you. Danny used one hand to line himself up with your cunt, and Jake did the same with your ass. “Ready, baby?” Danny asked.

“Yeah,” you sighed. Danny moved first, slowly pushing inside of you. Jake was more hesitant, but gently brought his hips forward. When he didn’t hear a single utter of discomfort, he continued. When both boys were inside of you, you let out a sigh of relief at the feeling of fullness.

“This is what you wanted, angel?” Jake murmured, already victim to the pleasure. “You just wanted to be a whore for us? Let us have you however we wanted?”

“Yeah.” You gasped, pivoting your body slightly to wrap an arm around Jakes neck. Your other hand was holding Danny’s shoulder, keeping yourself anchored in place as they began to move.

“Is it everything you dreamed of, baby?” Danny asked, matching his movements with Jake’s. They weren’t moving fast, but they were pulling you down on them as they moved, increasing the pressure building in your belly.

“God, yes.” Your head fell back, lost in the feeling of both of them inside you.

“It feels so good, doesn’t it?” Jake growled, his fingers digging into your hips. “Tell us how good it feels.”

“S-so good.” You whined, squeezing your eyes shut. The feeling was transcendent, more powerful than anything you had ever experienced. “It feels so fucking good.” You couldn’t contain your moans any longer, every sound that was begging to come out did just that, painting the room with sin. It was pornographic, the scene absolutely vulgar, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. The obscenity was fantastic, and you never wanted to leave the moment. If you could, you would have stayed there and fucked them for the rest of your life, just like that.

Both of the boys had been teetering the line of their own orgasms for the entire night. They had no idea they would enjoy the evening as much as they did, and they too were dreading the inevitable end. As much as they wanted to climax, they weren’t willing to do so without one last orgasm from you. “Can you give us one more, sweetheart?” Jake hissed, picking up his pace. Danny followed suit, using his strength to pull you down on them.

“You can do it, baby. I know you can.” Danny encouraged you, hopeful that you could do as they were asking. Most of it was due to his need for you to be fulfilled, but some of it was because he was scared he couldn’t hold himself back any more. “You’ve been so good for us, just keep it up for a little bit longer.”

“So proud of you, angel. Doing such a good job. Taking it so fucking good.” The combined praise was exhilarating; you had never felt so appreciated by anyone in your entire life. “One more, beautiful. I know you have it in you.” Jake pleaded.

“Fuck!” You exploded, the word followed by a guttural scream of pleasure. You couldn’t bite back the sound; it tore through you with a ferocity you had never felt before. “I’m gonna,” you assured them, a long jumble of curses flowing from your mouth, following the statement. Jakes hands were burning into you, Danny’s grip on your thighs tightening even more. They aimed to keep their movements synchronized, not wanting to jeopardize your ability to climax. The muscles in your abdomen tensed, your grip on them growing stronger as the burning in your belly reached its peak. You let out a shriek of euphoria, every nerve in your body ablaze with the relentless pleasure. You felt like you were ascending to another dimension, completely unaware of anything other than the feeling of them inside you. Your body was exhausted, and your mind was, too. You were completely fucked out, and they knew that. Before you came down, they both let go, too.

The room was filled with filthy sounds, swearing and slurs of names. The climax was intense for everyone, nobody could comprehend the emotion of the high. You all floated back to reality together, sleep calling to you before the bliss even came to an end. Euphoric was not a strong enough word to describe the feeling lingering throughout your body. After a moment of rest, both boys carefully withdrew from you. You all shuffled to the bed, Danny laying you in the nest of pillows and blankets, his body radiating with an air of love. They shared a look, scared that they might have pushed you too far, but after a moment, a smile began to creep on to your lips.

“How was that, angel?” Jake asked, hand resting on your thigh as a loving decoration.

“It was… phenomenal.” You breathed, finally able to sort your thoughts. “Just… yeah. Phenomenal.” You reiterated your point. They both let out a chuckle, happy that you were content and feeling the same way. “So, did you guys just decide this at the bar? Friendly talk over a few beers?” Their light chuckles turned into full laughter at your question.

“Think the thought was bouncing around for a while. Time was finally right.” Danny said, collapsing beside you.

“Saw that look in your eye when I brought it up, earlier. Couldn’t really resist that.” Jake added, thumb brushing over the skin that was littered with finger shaped bruises.

“I don’t mean to sound greedy… but was that a one time thing, or…?” You trailed off, finally opening your eyes to look between the two. Jake looked to Danny, knowing that he had the ultimate say in the matter. After a moment of silence, Danny gave a shrug.

“Suppose we could try it again, sometime.” He smirked. “If it would make you happy. You know I’d do anything to make you happy.”

“I wouldn’t mind that.” You confessed, a smile breaking out on your lips. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” Jake said, adding a touch of humour to what would normally be an awkward moment. The aftermath should have been dripping with an uncomfortable nature, but it seemed perfectly right. There was no discomfort present at all. You rested your hand on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze. You reached your other one out to Danny, lacing your fingers together.

“I do think it’s bedtime, though.” You stated, feeling a yawn start to surface.

“Right, we did interrupt, didn’t we?” Danny asked.

“Glad you did.” You hummed.

“So, what now? Do I get to sleep in bed, too?” Jake joked.

“Not a chance.” Danny shook his head, paired with a laugh. “Sorry, man.”

“Have some hospitality,” Jake feigned offence, but his smile told the joke for him. “Couch?”

“Definitely.” You and Danny mumbled, already feeling sleep settle in your bones.

“Understood.” He stood, giving your leg a gentle squeeze. “Hope you’re not too sore in the morning, trouble.” He said before gathering his clothes and disappearing into the hallway. Once he was out of sight, Danny pulled you into his arms.

“I love you,” he mumbled.

“I love you.” You said, relaxing into his hold and resting your head on his chest. “More than anything.” You placed a gentle kiss to his chest. “Thank you, baby. I don’t even know how to tell you how fantastic you are.”

“Like I said, bug. Anything to make you happy.” And he meant it; if allowing you access to Jake every now and again meant that he could keep you happy and have you forever, he would. It was something he could learn to live with, because he knew deep down that Jake was just a guilty pleasure, and he was the love of your life.

649 notes · View notes

writingsfromhome · 9 months ago

Text

Dos and Don’ts II

A/N: the story kinda got away from me so it’s getting a part 3. Would love to know what you think of the characters/choices!

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

—————————————————

It’s a beautiful morning; the late summer heat is right around the hour but for now the morning clouds keeps the city cool. I’m sat at Harry’s dinner table with stacks of paper around me, sorting out paperwork whilst on hold with a private venue he was playing in the fall to sort out some details his manager asked me for.

I had become good at my job, multitasking like a pro and not having to leave the room to make a call. After all, it had been nearly half a year of this.

And yet, my relationship with Harry Styles had stayed the same. Sometimes it felt like it got worse.

My other relationships, in the rest of my life, had definitely gotten worse.

“Riley just called said he’s sent over some prints I bought for the bedroom,” Harry pops into the room. “Can you call someone to put them up?”

“Yeah, where do you want them?” I get up so he can show me.

“Somewhere that looks good in there,” he waves his hand. “It’s pictures of me.”

“Of course they are,” I know how big-headed he could be. “Above the bed?”

“Hm,” he heads off to the bedroom so I follow. He examines each wall of his bedroom which was pretty neutral and relaxing to be in. “Why not? Yeah. Above the bed’s good.��

“Great.” With that I head back to my makeshift office.

I wondered why Riley didn’t message me directly about the prints considering we avoided getting Harry involved in these minor decisions.

Maybe I’d ask him tonight. We were having drinks—we tried a bunch of times to get together seeing we were “coworkers” but our timing rarely worked out. Since Gray was out of town the next two nights I’d reached out to Riley.

Evening comes quicker while I’m still buried behind paper. I start tidying up after 7.

“Going home?” Harry asks. He’d been out most of the day at voice lessons.

“Yes, your dinner’s in the oven and Roy said he left cocktails in the fridge.”

“Lovely Roy,” Harry rubs his hands together. “He makes the best drinks.”

I smile and go back to work.

“There’s enough for two,” he calls with his head in the fridge. “You want to join?”

Of course the one night Harry asks me to join him personally—a time I could use to get on his good side, I’m going out.

“I’m actually heading out for drinks myself.” He’s already placed the jug on the marble countertop.

“Oh.” He freezes awkwardly. “With your fiancé?”

“No,” for some reason I feel flustered at his mention of Gray. “With Riley actually. We’ve been meaning to get together for drinks since…I started. Wow. That’s been a long time.”

“Riley,” Harry purses his lips. “Does your fiancé know?”

“It’s a friendly drink,” I feel my temper flare. “I don’t need to report to my fiance.”

“If my fiancé was going out to drinks with a man with loose hands, I’d worry.”

“Well it’s a good thing we’re not engaged,” I mouth off before I can stop myself. He raises a brow and the single movement has me backpedaling. I was such a coward. “So you don’t have to worry.”

“Y/n you get away with a lot but I’d remember who’s working for who.”

I clench my teeth. Just seconds ago he was inviting me for a drink and now I’ve dug myself a grave. I couldn’t be stopped.

I grab my bag and head to the elevator.

“Don’t turn your back on him once he’s got a few drinks in.” Harry calls out.

Asshole, I think.

***

God, Riley talked a lot. He’s got 3 drinks to my 1.5 and really got the gift of the gab.

That is until he starts asking me about Harry.

“Do you find him hot? He’s kind of a lady’s man yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” I laugh. “Got ‘em all lined up.”

“And you?” He asks casually. “Has he got you yet?”

“Riley! I’m engaged,” I flash my ring.

“Didn’t stop the last girl,” he mutters.

“What? What’s that mean?”

“Nothing.”

“Tell me,” I poke him, knowing he wanted to talk about it anyway.

“Just that the last PA he had for…less than a year? She had a boyfriend and everything but one time I pop in early to set up for this masseuse right—I’m there and I hear someone in the bedroom with him. No big deal whatever. Then Harry comes out and he’s fuming just seeing me. Tells me to get out and leave the rest, that I should have called him. All this shite. And then I see her jacket, she wore a very specific jacket, and her shoes off the way. He was angry cuz I caught them.”

“Woah,” I think about the way Harry treats me. “Well I don’t have to worry about that. He can be a right dick with me.”

“He can come off that way. Until you get to know him. Well. He used to be nicer. It’s changed a bit since I started.”

“How long?” I ask, curious.

“Uhh I was his PA for a year and now this for one and a half?”

“Wow. That’s a long time.”

“I know. Too long. Well, big things are coming for me I can feel it. How about you? Are you staying long? I hear the way he talks to you, I don’t know how you put up with it.”

I thought he talked to all his PAs that way. Maybe he was different when Riley was his. Of maybe it was that Riley was a guy. Maybe the fame got to his head. “Uhm. I want to stick around for at least a year. What do you mean the way he talks to me?”

“He’s rude.” Riley runs his hand through his hair. “Don’t you find him rude? You’re surprisingly…graceful, but he’s always bossing you around and then ignoring you.”

I feel a pit in my stomach. So I wasn’t imagining it. “I thought that’s just the way he is.”

“No, you should have met him a couple years ago. A really cool guy. He taught me a lot.” Riley suddenly sobers as he looks off into the distance. “I grew a lot with him. I’m thankful for that y’know?”

“Right,” I nod. “Yeah. I dunno. I’m hoping to learn a lot here.”

“Well if you want to stay connected, keep my number. When you wanna jump ship just let me know.”

I’m surprised Riley is talking so openly about helping me leave. I would have thought he was a Harry die-hard.

“Yeah. Hey are you the one that’s created all those notes on the phone? They’ve been a life saver.”

“Notes? Oh the lists. I made them when I was his PA. I don’t know if the last girl updated any…”

I think of the snarky additions. She definitely did.

“Well I owe you my first-born because without them I’m pretty sure I would have been fired.”

“No you wouldn’t have,” he smirks.

“Uh yeah, I forgot to bring his bloody tablet to the studio the first day. He was so mad.”

“He wouldn’t fire you y/n,” he cocks his head to the side. “Not with the way I see it.”

“Huh?” I ask but Riley’s turned to the bar to ask for another drink.

I excuse myself and freshen up, checking my phone for messages. Gray’s sent me a picture of his hotel view and I send him a quick text back. I wish he was here. Maybe it was time I got home, I was starting to feel tired.

“I’m thinking of heading home,” I tell Riley when I get back.

“Now?” He looks at his watch. “Night’s still young y/l/n.”

“I’ve been up since 6 I’m dead.”

“Fine, I’ll walk you outside.” Riley knocks back half his drink and stands, swaying slightly. I put my hand out to steady him and he smiles down at me.

The pub is crowded as we walk past people, shoulders brushing against strangers. It takes me a second to feel the hand on my back sliding down to my ass.

I whip around to chew out whichever stranger thought he could get a grope but the only person behind me is Riley with a cocky smile.

“You alright? Let’s keep going.”

I can hear the blood pumping in my ears and I stumble back, Harry’s words echoing in my ear.

“I’m alright.” I try to put distance between us. “I’ll walk myself out you should look after your drink.”

“Nah c’mon,” he reaches for me again and I inch back.

“I said I’m okay,” I know my voice comes out harsh due to the fear coursing through my body. But I don’t care.

“Bloody hell alright then,” Riley shrugs. “Night y/n.”

I wait for him to turn and leave before I get out of there. The night air cools down the flush in my cheeks but I can’t get my heart to stop racing. Harry was right and for some reason it makes me angry at him. I’m furious.

All these men just made me feel small and confused all the time. Is that what I had to accept working in this industry? Was I just naïve for thinking things could be decent? That people could be decent?

I wish more than ever that Grayson was here. I imagine him on his own in another city. Then I imagine him alone, at home, while I’m working all the time. It felt like we were on a piece of ice drifting through the ocean and the middle was cracking leaving us to drift alone. My heart feels like it’s cracking with it.

I call Gray on the ride home just to see his face. I listen to him talk about his day and slowly my grip on the anger loosens. Slowly with his voice in my ear, I come back down to earth.

***

It’s a couple weeks after the Riley incident. I’d come into work the next day and managed to ignore Harry for most of it just like he did me.

Today I’m back at the dining table waiting for Harry’s publicist to call me to take me through what was left for this upcoming weekend for a small awards show Harry had been nominated in that was happening Sunday. Riley would be on the call too, the first time I’d seen him since that night. I just hoped my pokerface was good enough to move on past any awkwardness.

“Let me get your thoughts on this,” Harry sits down across from me with a yoghurt. He’d just come from the gym and seeing him shirtless now was just another Thursday afternoon.

He’d taken to using me as a soundboard lately which started out interesting and got old quickly. He loved to hear himself talk, I’ve concluded. And I was forced to listen. And he always lied. He never wanted my thoughts on anything, just an ego stroke.

And just like usual he launches into a song he’s working on and something about string progression and inversion. I nod along until my phone rings and I pick it up instantly.

Graham and I speak about the details of event and I reassure him everything would run smoothly. When I’m done Harry’s nearly done the smoothie he grabbed while I was on the phone.

“Austria tomorrow, everything’s prepped?”

“Yep, for you.”

“Not for you?”

“I have the rest of the week off?” I remind him just like I’d been doing for the last two weeks. So this wouldn’t happen.

“You do? I thought that was next week. What am I gonna do without you there it’s 4 days.”

“I reckon you’ll survive,” I say with a light tone but I’ve learned the art of backhanded jokes. It felt like the only way to get some of my aggression out. “Plus Riley’s joining you Saturday afternoon.”

“So I’ll be alone on Friday?”

I look up from my laptop, “Are you ever really alone?”

“I guess I’ll just have to invite one of my girls to keep me company,” he continues watching me. “Keep my bed warm.”

“If you’d like,” I hated when he tried to make me uncomfortable. “Let me know which one and I can cut her a ticket.”

He clenches his jaw and levels me with an irritated look. “I’m sure Vienna has many beautiful people to choose from.”

Ignore ignore ignore. I go back to my screen and leave him on heard.

***

“It’s been too long,” Gray clinks his glass with mine. It’s Friday night and we’re having an early anniversary celebration.

This whole weekend I promised Gray I would be his from Friday though Sunday even though our actual anniversary was on Monday.

Our relationship that was once so strong, supportive, and loving had started treading rocky grounds. I felt jostled and very close to being kicked right off the ride altogether.

I look at my fiancé’s face, his dark features and serious looks made him look intimidating but a flicker of his smile and you felt like you were on the ins with him about something. I had missed him.

The last time we did anything together was at the beginning of summer. I had a long weekend off and he’d driven us to lake district, soaking in the sun and hiking along the peaks. We’d had a serious conversation about our relationship but a lot of it had felt like me apologizing and him accusing.

“You look radiant,” Gray reaches for my hand. “How are you?”

I didn’t think he wanted the real answer. I hold back a sigh and replace it with a smile, “Alright. Better now to be with you.”

He kisses the back of my hand and my stomach flutters. “Me too. I’m excited for this weekend.”

“Let’s see we’re seeing friends tomorrow for brunch, then doing old school movies and dinner in the evening.”

“That was one of our first dates don’t make fun.”

“I’m not! It’s a classic I’m excited. It’s been so long since I saw a movie with you.”

With Harry, I’d seen a few. I was always told to tag along on premieres Riley passed on.

“And Sunday we’re just being lazy bed bugs.”

“Mmm that sounds amazing.” I could use a day in bed. A week in bed would be even better.

The night is perfect and romantic and it soothes the heartache I’d been carrying, the guilt that I was killing my relationship. Gray is attentive and we laugh like we always did.

I don’t mention work. It makes me anxious knowing I had to put the biggest part of my life on mute in order to keep the good vibes going with Gray.

Saturday brunch brings me back to life. I’d missed our friends and catching up on their lives, all the chatter and the laughter. Gray keeps reaching for me at the table and I feel like I belong.

“So how’s the tyrant?” My friends had started calling Harry that since he always kept me from most of our social outings.

“The usual,” I try to keep it short for Gray’s sake.

“Grayson was complaining that you spend more time with him than your actual fiancé!”

“Is that so?” I turn to Gray with a teasing expression but he’s serious.

“I wouldn’t have helped her with the job if I knew,” Gray jokes when I nudge him. The table laughs but I fake it, knowing the kernel of truth in it.

“He can’t be all that bad?” Another friend asks.

“Nope. Pretty consistently bad,” I tell them. “I’m just telling myself it’s vital experience. It’s the only thing that helps me sleep.”

“When she sleeps at all,” Gray slips in another passive joke and I try to distance myself from it.

“Just wait, in a couple years I’ll be living my best life.” I raise my glass.

“To y/n’s best life,” the table cheers.

On the walk home from brunch Gray and I swing hands in between us. I want to bring up his passive comments but it feels stuck in my throat. His hand feels like lead in mine.

“Gray-“

“I’m sorry. I got a bit salty at brunch,” Gray admits. I nearly deflate completely with the sigh that comes out of me.

“That’s okay,” I kiss his cheek. His hand feels like an extension of mine again. “I know there’s a lot of things we don’t talk about, I know my job doesn’t make you happy. But I appreciate that you still support me and keep the peace even when I can be a bit of a dick sometimes.”

“Hey,” Gray stops and tugs me to him. “I love you. Nothing changes that.”

“I love you too,” he kisses me with the same passion he did last night, our first intimate night after a couple months. With the urgency in his kiss I can tell it wouldn’t be another couple until the next.

***

We get back in around 8 and I happily kick off the dress and boots I wore to dinner to snuggle in my pjs. I watch Gray remove his contacts as I comb through my hair.

“I still can’t believe that ending,” Gray says to me in the mirror.

“Same, I feel like everyone’s kept it so hush I didn’t even know there was going to be a plot twist!”

“I kind of saw it coming-“

“You did not!” I flick Gray. “Why do guys love to brag about seeing a movie ending coming.”

“It’s our roman empire,” he grins.

“You’re using that in the wrong context,” I roll my eyes. “Josie would be so disappointed. Oh I didn’t even turn my phone back on after the movie, Josie had texted me something.”

“Just leave it,” Gray calls out as I go back into the room to get my purse. “Let’s keep our phones off, stay unplugged tonight.”

“Too late,” I grin as my phone powers on already.

I know Gray stayed nervous about any call I got during our down time because he always thought it was Harry. To be honest I was surprised he hadn’t bothered me more than asking for a password yesterday.

As my services connect my phone vibrates with a dozen oncoming messages.

“Y/n,” I hear Grayson say in warning but my eyes stay glued to the screen that flicker with notifications.

I look up once they settle, my eyes are as wide as saucers and Gray’s watch me through the mirror, heavy and resigned.

“Please, ignore it,” Gray pleads just once.

“I just…I need to know what it’s about.” I plead back.

“It’s going to spiral,” he warns. “You can’t just look y/n you’re gonna get involved.”

“What if it’s an emergency? He wouldn’t message like this unless it’s an emergency!”

“Like the documents on Josie’s birthday? Or the hospital appointment that one bank holiday? Or his empty fridge on-“

“I get it. But Gray I have 14 notifications. And it’s from his manager too it’s gotta be an-“

“You have a life y/n!” Gray turns around quick like a pistol whip, I stumble back into the doorframe. “He has other people in his life other than you they can figure it out! Why do you keep putting your job, this man, before me? Before us?!”

“I’m not trying to! I’m not!” I stutter.

“What’s the worst case scenario huh? He tries you, and you don’t answer because you’re off. And he’ll find someone else to help—those type always have someone else.”

“You don’t get it-“

“I get it.” Gray lowers his volume. He looks around for his glasses and slides them on. “I get it clearly. You’re just scared you’re replaceable to Harry Styles.”

His words stun me a little. All I can do is watch as he puts on jeans and grabs his phone.

“Do you ever wonder who else in your life’s replaceable?” Gray says before he slams our door shut.

I sink back and my mind races with everything Grayson just said. I was awful, he must feel even more awful and I-

My phone vibrates. Jeff.

“H-hi?” I answer.

“What the fuck y/n! I’ve been trying to reach you for the last 2 hours-“

“My phone was off-“

“Have you even gotten any of the messages we’ve left you-“

“I’m not working today-“

“Obviously,” He cuts me off for the hundredth time. “Harry’s in Vienna alone with god knows who!”

I don’t point out the contradiction in his sentence.

“Isn’t Riley supposed to be with him?”

“Riley quit.”

“What?! When?”

“Today. Apparently the sneak’s been cozying up with one of Harry’s supposed friends. He’s left us high and dry!”

“Is that why you’re calling me?” My confusion grows.

“Jesus no. Just look at your bloody messages.”

I put him on speaker and check the link to the photos he sent me. I gasp.

Harry looks a mess, one in a bar and another right outside it. With a questionable choice of friends.

“He’s not answering his phone,” Jeff continues. “Nobody can reach him and Riley decided to courier the stupid phone back to the penthouse so we don’t have access to his gps. But you do. That’s why I’m trying to reach you y/n. You’ve gotta go there and get him home.”

“Get him home? He’s in another country!”

“Yes, for that niche fucking awards show. You gotta get him back to his hotel and sober him up. We paid some fucker way too much money not to leak these photos and I don’t want to find out some other fucker took more.”

“Isn’t this something his publicist should be doing? Or you?” I’m starting to get angry. Why was Harry like a big fucking toddler that I had to go get when he was misbehaving. “I took the weekend off-“

“Listen. Y/n. We will pay you 5 times your rate if you just get on a plane and sort him out. I’m in Iceland right now. On holiday! Nobody is paying me 5 times the amount to deal with this and I don’t get back to the UK until tomorrow.”

“His publicis-“

“And Graham is the one that caught all this but he doesn’t fly out until tomorrow. So that leaves you. Mr. Styles’ personal assistant.”

I think about Gray, should I call him? Let him know? Fuck. Fuck Harry and his ability to ruin my whole life.

“I don’t have a choice here do I?” I ask wearily.

“Sure you do, one gets you a nice pay check. The other doesn’t.”

“Fuck,” I swear just loud enough for him to hear. “Do you know when the next flight is.”

“There’s a private jet that can leave within the hour I’ll text you the address can you make it?”

I map it. 30 or so minutes away. I look around my room—I had my emergency duffle with my passport the Harry Survival Guide told me to keep so I didn’t need to pack much.

“Yeah. I’ll be there.”

***

“Out of all the fucking nights,” I swear as I take the elevator down. The flight had been under 2 hours and I’d kept my eyes glued to Harry’s phone locator. He’d moved one location so far. The hotel wasn’t too far from this location so I drop my bags off on the en-suite and head out into the beautiful city.

It’s buzzing despite the hour and I wish it was a calmer trip so I could take pictures and soak in the beauty of Vienna.

Instead I trudge on to the little dot on my phone and avoid thinking about Gray and how much he would love this city. And how badly I betrayed him tonight.

What to do when he won’t answer the phone: track his gps, get good at lock-picking and don’t be shy to call whoever he’s out with to get ahold of him. Harry not answering his phone unexpectedly usually means bad decisions.

I find Harry in a kitschy club but it’s not easy. In the flashes of blue and purple lights I sort through all the men about the same height as him. None of them are him.

I knew he was here. I scan the room a second time, he had to be in one of the private sections.

I walk the perimeter until I see a flash of a familiar laugh.

“Harry!” I shout but a man in a suit steps in front of me.

“Private area,” he says in a rough accent.

“I’m his assistant I need to see him!” I point to Harry but he just steps in my way again. I shout Harry’s name and on the second try he looks up.

“Heyy!” He lights up and picks his way over the people sitting around him. He loops his arm around the brick wall in front of me. “That’s y/n! Y/n you came let her in!”

“Thank you,” I shoot the man a dirty look even though I knew he was just doing his job. He was the difference between a PR disaster and no disaster. “Harry we-“

“Have a drink!” He slurs. My heart quickens when I get a glimpse of the table with an assortment of drugs all over it. “Relax. C’mon c’mon!”

Harry pours me champagne and leads me by the hand to where he was just sitting. A couple shift away to make room for me but I stay standing as Harry sinks into the cushion.

“Mr. Styles we-“

“Ms. Y/L/N,” Harry says seriously before bursting into laughter. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this uninhibited before. One part of me is nervous and another part finds it intriguing.

He tugs me down and I tip into the couch, the champagne sloshing over the rim. What the-

“Relax,” he whispers into my ear. It goes straight to my stomach. “Have some champagne and enjoy the night!”

“I want to-“

“Your fiancé won’t let you drink with me? Is that the issue here?”

“No,” I bite. “I am taking you back-“

“I,” Harry sits up and hovers over me. “I am not speaking to you until you drink! Good god woman, lean back! Relax! What do Americans say take a chill pill?”

“I don’t need a chill pill.”

Harry mimes zipping his lips closed.

I roll my eyes and bring the champagne to my lips to take a mock sip but he must anticipate this. Using his finger he tips the glass even further. Half of it drips down my chin.

“Agh!” I jerk the glass away but Harry just laughs. “This is so not funny.”

He leans in smiling. I expect him to stop but he continues moving into me until his lips are on my jaw. His mouth coasts over my skin before he buries his head in my neck where the champagne had dripped down leaving a pool of heat-

“Harry!” I jerk away and push my hands into his chest to prop him up. His eyes are half-closed but as intense as ever as he looks into mine.

What the fuck. What the fuck just happened.

My hands are shaking, steady only because of the force of Harry pressing into them. I feel the tears springing to my eyes, why the fuck did he just…

“Sorry,” he smiles, his finger brushing my cheek. “Y’had some champagne there.”

It was nothing, I tell myself. He’s drunk and taken god knows what. He’s out of his mind. And he was going for the champagne, not me.

I loosen my arms but he comes back towards me again.

“Fuck this,” I mutter. I push him back into the sofa and get up. “We are going back to the hotel. Now.”

“Just stay a little longer here. It’s life. I’m bloody famous!” His hands come around my waist to pull me towards him but I dig my heel in.

I grab him by the shirt and haul his lanky body up, it’s like lifting a slab of marble. We nearly fall into the table but I catch us on my back leg in time.

I get us outside and call a taxi. Harry sways into me and I help keep him up.

“S’cold,” he complains.

“It’s really not.” I look back to him but he doesn’t look good. I lean him against the wall gently. “Harry look at me.”

He eyes stay closed but his head bobbles and he starts to tip forward again.

“Harry!” I nearly slap him. Instead I push him against the wall and use my body to keep him propped upright. I grab his face in my hands. “Harry look at me you’re scaring me.”

“You’re scaring me,” he slurs.

I shake his face a bit and try to pry open an eye which makes him laugh.

“I was alone,” he mumbles.

“I am not carrying you into or out of that car so you better stay conscious.” I tap his cheek.

“You’re no fun.” He says and I ignore him. “I was alone but you came.”

“Not out of any choice,” I mumble.

Our taxi arrives and I’m shaking him every few minutes to keep him conscious. At the hotel I get some help to his room when they recognize his face.

I drop him in bed with a sigh of relief. He looked pathetic like that. And I wanted to cry out of frustration.

I take his shoes off and then his shirt, deciding to keep his trousers on. I leave a bottle of water on his bedside with painkillers and head to the bathroom. For the second time tonight I get ready for bed.

I scrub the sticky champagne out of my neck and block out the feeling of his lips on me. Block out the confusing feelings that arose.

I grab my phone and pray for a text from Gray but there’s nothing. I update Jeff and he sends me a thumbs up. All that and just a fucking thumbs up.

***

Still no text from Gray the next morning.

Harry’s still in bed when I get up. I crack on and order both of us breakfast, ordering the most expensive things just to get something out of being here.

Harry wakes to the smell of coffee, groaning as soon as he sits up. I don’t know what he took last night but it serves him right.

“Y/n?” He sounds just as confused as last night.

“In the flesh,” I nearly growl.

“I thought Riley’s s’pose to be here?”

“So you do remember I’m supposed to be off all weekend.” I can’t hold back on the sass. I’m too mad at everyone.

“Yeah…what?”

“Riley quit.”

“Riley…quit? That’s why you’re here?”

“No.” I want to throw my cup of coffee in his face. “I’m here because you weren’t answering your phone last night and the only updates we were getting were compromising pictures of you absolutely pissed.”

“You sound like my publicist.”

“Your publicist had to pay the photographer off.”

“It couldn’t be that bad,” Harry swings his legs over the side of the bed and winces. He notices the painkillers and pops them. “Did you undress me?”

I pull the photos up on my phone and show them to him. He throws the phone down on the bed after a glance.

“Okay so he sent you to get me back to the hotel?”

“Jeff called me.”

“Jeff’s on holiday.”

“So was I.” My anger brews over. “I had 2 fucking days off Harry and I couldn’t even get that! You had to go to Vienna and get pappd doing the stupidest shit and of course I have to come in and save your ass because I can’t get any time these days to just be!”

He groans as he gets up and shuffles towards me. My heart picks up speed but he simply reaches for the coffee and takes a big gulp. The silence stretches out after my outburst and I wait with an anxious anger for what comes out of his mouth.

“You didn’t have to come. I could have lived with the consequences of being an idiot last night-“

“Jeff didn’t give me a choic-“

“There’s always a choice,” he holds up his finger to my face, hovering an inch from my lips. “Jeff can’t do shite. If he fired you he needs my final say. So again, I didn’t ask you to come here.”

Fuck him, I think. Does he really think I could have said no and gone on with my night? Since it didn’t come out of his mouth, he vanishes any accountability? He’d totally at fault here.

“Secondly,” he wasn’t finished I guess and his eyes are like laser beams into my soul. “It’s Mr. Styles.”

Anything I was about to mouth off on disappears. Like a sinkhole it all collapses below the surface and I’m left feeling as I always did—humiliated.

“Now,” Harry puts his cup down. “That’s not to say thank you for coming to my rescue yesterday. I don’t remember a lot of it so I’m not sure what happened but I’m sure it wasn’t pretty.”

I don’t answer. I bite my tongue until it falls right off and I can swallow it. I wish I could also swallow the memory of his lips that spring to mind.

“It is a Sunday, if you’d like to take it off feel free. The stylist team is coming around 4 to get me ready for tonight.”

“Well, you’ll need me to coordinate this evening since that was the point of Riley being here,” my voice comes out smoother than I felt.

“Ok,” he dismisses me. “I need a shower.”

He leaves and I clench my fists to keep from throwing everything within range at him. How could he flip the script like this? Turn my life upside down and then act like he did nothing wrong?

I go to my phone and hover over Grayson to call him but i have a notification from him. He’s sent me a message, it’s a link.

I click it. It’s a small article in a tabloid about Harry Styles and his mystery woman. You can’t tell it’s me but our pose looks intimate from last night—him leaning against the wall with my knee in between his legs and my body propping him up while my hands hold his face.

But Grayson knows its me.

I get my other phone and message it in the group with Harry’s publicist.

He responds casually: It’ll blow over don’t worry. Can’t see your face plus romantic is better than looking fucked up like the other pics.

It would blow over for Harry but not for me.

I try to call Grayson but he doesn’t pick up.

I close the room door and bury myself in bed, aching so hard it was hard to believe I was still breathing. It felt like an end, I know I could talk it through with Grayson and explain once he saw the other photos. But something feels like it died tonight.

***

“Y/n?” A voice sings outside my door. “Helloo?”

I feel hungover as I open my crusty eyes. I’m in an unfamiliar room and-

“Hello hello?”

I sit up. I was in a hotel suite and I had to help get Harry to his show. Shit.

I look at the time, it’s nearly 5.

“Sorry!” I shout at whoever was behind the door. “Sorry one sec!”

One look in the mirror and I know I had to throw my hair up. I swish some mouthwash around and exit to the lounge.

“Hi,” a woman I’ve never met smiles kindly at me.

“Sorry. Did you need something from me?”

“Yes,” she takes my arm and leads me towards where Harry was getting his hair done. He looks amused as he watches me. “I need you here. We need to get you ready.”

“Oh no,” I say but sit where I’m told by this commanding woman. “Oh I’m just helping coordinate so you just focus on Mr.-“

“Y/n,” Harry’s deep voice cuts me off. “Riley comes with me to these things when Jeff isn’t around. Since neither are here you’re joining me and Graham.”

I look for his publicist but I’m told he was running late. Great.

“I didn’t sign up for this,” I say as the woman takes a wet wipe to my face. “I thought I had Sunday off.”

“You reminded me you’re replacing Riley,” Harry says. “And I got the team to get you a few things but I don’t know your size. I’m sure one of them will fit. Kit can tailor it if you need.”

“Wha…” my face is positioned to the side and cream is dotted all over. I shut my mouth and glance at Harry which becomes a glare when I realize he’s enjoying this.

“Lighten up Y/N, it’s not the end of the world.”

He didn’t know. It was the end of my world.

***

The red carpet or whatever this imitation of it was is a sensory nightmare. Graham had explained on the car over I was to stick to the shadows with him and his security detail. I don’t know why they stuck me in this beautifully tailored pantsuit just to be in the shadows. But apparently I could keep it so I was happy about that.

While Harry gets his name shouted and photos taken I watch from the side, hiding behind Graham’s shoulder so I don’t get caught in any pictures. The flashes still make my head hurt.

Again, we stand off to the side as Harry gets interviewed by labels I recognized and others that must be local. One woman has the nerve to ask,

“So Harry the whole internet is dying to know who your mystery woman is. Would you like to give our viewers a hint?”

I stiffen and Graham glances my way with a warning look. He’d already prepped Harry in the car but I couldn’t believe someone would be so bold as to ask. But that was show business.

“Ah you know what the media’s like, all out of context. I love the theories especially the one about this being my secret fiancé but I would like the viewers to know I’m not engaged, very much single, and not to believe everything you see online.”

I hold my breath as Harry answers but he’s a natural, I had to admit. He went off script a little—he wasn’t supposed to acknowledge the content of the photo, but he did so with grace and humour. Wow. I could learn a few things.

Graham relaxes beside me once the reporter laughs and asks if he sees himself not being single any time soon. When we finally move on Graham wraps his arm around Harry’s shoulder and gives it a shake.

“You did good kid,” he kisses his cheek with all the leftover adrenaline from the carpet. “I’ll see you in there. I see some friends I want to catch up with first.”

Then it’s just Harry and I, and his shadow of a security detail who Harry dismisses while he’s inside the room.

“So I guess now’s the part you go to your seat?” I ask. There was no What to do at an Awards Show so I was clueless and I decided I would create one myself to keep the legacy of all these dos and don’ts.

“It is,” Harry looks…nervous? His eyes flicker around the room and his jaw twitches. I do a sweep of my own, there’s a lot of people I don’t recognize and those I do I’m just about dying trying to stay casual.

“I thought that reporter was going to propose after you cleared up how single you were.”

“Hm?” Harry looks at me—in heels I was finally near eye-level to him. His gaze clears as he takes in what I said and I consider it a win getting him back down to earth. “Oh. Her, yeah she was cheeky with those questions wasn’t she?”

His smile makes me stomach dip. “Yeah she slipped them in so expertly. I thought ‘I have to take some tips from her’. And you, you were good dodging the question.”

“I didn’t lie,” Harry’s now fully engaged in our conversation. I give myself a pat on the back. “It was just you and I am still single.”

Just you. I fake a laugh, “Yeah. That photo is proof that I’m stronger than I look because you were deadweight and I managed to get you to bed y’know that.”

His green eyes flicker up and down my face for a beat. “I know that. I…hope that picture didn’t get you into any trouble.”

I look away, unsure how to answer. He brings a hand to my arm. “I can talk to someone if it helps?”

“Oh no,” my cheeks flush. “No I don’t think that would make anything better but thank you. I…appreciate the-“

“Harry? Oh my god it’s you!”

I retreat in a quarter of a second, invisible once again for Harry to shine with his colleagues. It’s a singer I recognize but I only remember her stage name, Dragon something. I watch them embrace and I try to wind up the spool of thread I’d released when Harry showed some kindness.

I think I had some issues, I became unrecognizable every time Harry was nice for a moment. I had to remember that it was temporary and there were boundaries I couldn’t cross.

Yesterday flashes into my mind. God, was it just yesterday?

Harry starts walking with the other musician arm in arm. It comes to me as I follow why I knew her. There were rumours shortly before I interviewed with Harry about seeing him on the town with this woman. So they had history. Of course.

By the time Graham joins me in our seats I’ve become part of the wallpaper and I feel like I’m being torn away when he acknowledges me to ask if everything had gone ok. I stay invisible for the rest of the evening and I try to remember that’s how it would be.

***

We’re sat on the tarmac for the ride home and I try to refresh my messages over and over but Gray hasn’t responded after I’d told him we had to talk. He was stupidly good at the cold shoulder and I felt like a needy bitch whenever he got like this.

“Could I get a water y/n?” Harry asks from across the aisle. He has his head tipped back and he looks awful—consequences of an after party where he drank himself silly again and relied on me to get him home. I did make friends with some other PAs who were roped to the party so that was the only highlight.

“Sure.” I go to the front of the jet where Graham is typing away on his laptop, oblivious to the rest of us. I grab Harry a coffee too. “It’ll help with the hangover.”

Harry accepts it graciously and I go back to refreshing my phone.

I thought he’d fallen asleep an hour into the flight until he unbuckles his seat and slips in beside me.

“Can I get your phone?” He holds his hand out.

“Why?” I ask suspiciously.

“You’re driving me crazy refreshing that thing it’s like you’re getting paid per refresh.”

I was lost in a trance doing it. I put the phone facedown on my lap but he takes it from me.

“Hey-“

“I’m keeping this until we land. I promise you if you haven’t gotten any messages by now you won’t get any at all.”

His patronizing tone wriggles something loose and I have to look away, out the window, so he doesn’t see the tears.

“My offer still stands,” he says quietly after my silence. I shake my head.

“Thanks,” my voice wavers. “It won’t help. He just gets…quiet. Any time there’s an issue he just goes quiet and it drives me f…crazy. I feel crazy.”

“You kind of look it.” I’m ready to throw him a dirty look but Harry’s smiling when I look at him. I was rarely on the receiving end of such a handsome look that I forget I was going to be mad. “What? You do, hunched over your phone pressing down over and over. My neck hurts just looking at you.”

I sigh and leans back into the seat, trying to straighten myself out.

“Sorry,” I sniffle. “I just need some sort of proof of life from him. He knows it drives me crazy when he ignores me but he does it anyway. He could be dead for all I know. Anyway, I’ll stop now you can give me my phone back.”

“Mmm no,” Harry pats the pocket he put it in. “You listen to me. It stays here.”

I don’t fight him. It was for my own good.

He sits with me for the rest of the flight. It should be uncomfortable but having another person’s presence beside me—knowing there was a shoulder pressing against mine, makes me feel a little less lonely today.

He probably didn’t intend that, I rethink the thought. Harry wasn’t thoughtful like that, he was probably just too lazy to move back.

We take the car home when we land but Harry tells me to take the rest of the Monday off even though it was already 2.

“And y/n,” Harry stops me before I exit the car where it stalls outside my complex.

“Yes?” I wait for the other shoe to drop—I had the day off but…

“If he knows it drives you crazy, and he truly loves you, he should respect you and give you a chance to talk. You deserve that.”

My breath catches at the unexpected words. I feel my defences go up.

“You’ll work it out,” he rushes on when I don’t respond.

I’m left feeling slightly reassured and mostly confused.

“Thank you,” I look at him a beat too long and it feels awkward so I scramble out and head up. To someone I hope was willing to listen like Harry said.

***

Like a baby calf out of the womb, my relationship stays on shaky grounds. It feels like building a foundation all over again after thinking that was already done with, but Hurricane Harry had caused a lot of damage.

Now 9 months into my new job I wasn’t always so on edge. But I was busy.

With no Riley, the team had decided to hold off on hiring anyone new and my work load had tripled. I’d brought it up casually and just as casually Harry had let me know I would be compensated.

I thought about Vienna a lot. Things were done and said there that should change our dynamic but didn’t. Not much. Harry was still an ass, he still demanded most of my time, and I still suffered from major anxiety about my life falling apart.

So maybe I was still on edge, just about different things.

“G’morning,” Gray whispers to me. I wanted to sleep in and cuddle with my fiancé but I’d already snoozed my alarm and I knew I had to get to work. I had errands to run all over town.

“Morning,” I burrow my head into his warm body. “I don’t wanna work.”

He kisses the top of my head. “How about I join you on some of those errands you mentioned? We can get coffee?”

I’m suddenly excited about going to work.

Gray laughs when I climb over him and kiss him like a lunatic, and we’ve been together too long to be embarrassed about morning breath or pillow face. I can’t believe I almost lost him.

The day is perfect as Gray and I move around town doing odd bits. We get to grab lunch together and I’m so glad what a good sport Gray had been about it all since I’d forced him to carry any heavy items.

“I’ll see you for dinner,” Gray drops me off at Harry’s. We linger in the lobby for a few minutes. “I’m cooking.”

“Mmm can’t wait,” I kiss him before taking the load from him. “Thank you for coming with me today.”

“I had fun, I hate to admit it.” He grins as I walk backwards to the elevator. He takes my breath away.

Grayson’s eyes widen and he opens his mouth to say something but I collide into a body behind me before he can warn me.

“Oh shit sorry I-“ I turn and Harry stands behind me with Jeff walking off the elevator. He was probably headed to the studio and I was late. Dammnit!

“Y/N,” Harry says.

“I’m so. Sorry,” I look between Gray, Jeff, and Harry. Do I introduce everyone? Do I apologize and rush to drop these things off so I could join them like I’m supposed to?

Jeff makes it easy, walking away on his phone. Then it’s Harry and Gray.

“I’m sorry I meant to be upstairs five minutes ago.” I tell Harry who’s expression is hard to read. “Uhm…this is Grayson my fiance I don’t think y’all have met he was just dropping me off since I had my hands full. Um. Gray this is…well you know who this is I-“

My blabbering is cut short as Harry steps forward to shake hands and I nearly die at the steely look Gray gives him. Also, why the fuck did I say y’all?! I wasn’t even southern.

“Grayson Duran yeah? Nice to meet you,” Harry says. I’m surprised he knows his full name. He must have asked his friends.

“Yeah,” Gray drops his hand. “The infamous Harry Styles—I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Likewise,” Harry says, glancing at me. Why would he say that. “As much as I’d love to chat, y/n you’re late and we’re heading to the studio. Can you give all that to the concierge?”

“Yes,” I nod. “Have you got-“

“I grabbed my things yes. I’ll see you in the car.”

Harry nods to Gray and leaves an air of cologne and annoyance behind. Gray and I lock eyes and I burn with embarrassment.

“What a dick,” Gray mumbles.

I’m offended, wait, why am I offended? It’s not like Harry wasn’t a dick.

“Yeah, I gotta go sorry babe.” I rush to the concierge and explain the delivery.

“Y’all?” Gray asks when I rush back to him.

“I know I know,” I cringe. “It just came out. I gotta go but thank you so much for today. Loveyoubye!”

I give him a quick peck and rush out, nearly collapsing into Harry’s car.

“Sorry about that, being late. That won’t happen again I meant to be there before you left-“

“As long as it doesn’t happen again,” Harry says stiffly, staring out the window. He was a dick, Gray was right. But why was I so offended at him saying that right after meeting him?

Things felt so confusing these days and I just wanted time to catch my breath and figure things out. A few more weeks and I’d get some time off for the holidays at least, I was looking forward to that.

***

Even though I planned the intimate holiday party and spent countless hours on the phone making sure every detail would be perfect I can’t help but criticize it as I join.

“Maybe I should have gone with a live band,” I mutter as someone takes mine and Grayson’s coats. Tonight I was supposed to shut my brain off as Harry said, and enjoy the party as a guest. But that part was hard to shut off after nearly 10 months of re-wiring it.

Grayson was tough to convince but finally he’d agreed to come to the party. Things were mostly back to normal with us. I tried to be home by 7 most nights and didn’t talk about work too much.

But sometimes it felt like a volcano lived inside me with how much I had to compartmentalize and keep in and when times got really tough, I wanted to spew everywhere.

“Josie told me your mom’s doing bohemian Christmas?” I ask Gray as we hover by the foyer. I’d just had a catchup with her yesterday now that she was finished exams. “Do you know what that means.”

“Mum’s crazy,” Gray sighs. His relationship with her was always followed by a sigh, an eye roll, a heavy resignation for who she was. I never quite understood it.

Josie, on the other hand, loved their loud and free-spirited mother. As for me, I thought she was the most interesting woman I ever met and we’d gotten along instantly.

“She’s always got some new idea up her sleeve,” I try to make things more positive. “What do you want a bet it’s going to be vegan?”

“I don’t bet when I know that’s what she’s serving. That’s why we do dad’s for lunch and hers for dinner. We’re too stuffed once we get there to care what she’s serving.”

“Remember when I tried to get you to go vegan and-“

“Y/N! Hi,” I’m interrupted by a friendly face in the crowd and end up chatting with people I’d worked with the last few months. We introduce our partners and they chat but I keep an eye on Grayson, in case anything changes.

I watch Harry’s friends trickle in and Gray lights up when he sees Liam and a few other people he trained.

I flit around the room with ease after that, knowing Gray had friends to keep him company. I make sure drinks are filled and catering is setting up. Until a hand stops me.

“You’re not supposed to be working tonight,” Harry reminds me.

“Yes. Right. Well…”

“Y/N,” he warns.

“Okay!” I throw my hands up. “Not working, here look I’m enjoying myself!”

I pick up a random drink and take a big sip. Champagne. Suddenly I remember the last time I drank champagne in front of Harry and I nearly cough it back up.

“Ugh,” Harry hands me a napkin and I try not to bristle. “What happened? Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” I clear my throat. “Yeah sorry just…just not a fan of champagne.”

We lock eyes and I’m gripped with the sudden and very real possibility that Harry may actually remember parts of that night.

When his eyes flicker down to my neck, it’s confirmed. Oh god.

“Well! I’m off to find a better drink!” I turn too quickly, nearly taking out the caterer who was setting up hors d’œuvres on the table. “Sorry!”

Oh my god. Harry remembered.

Did he remember this whole time? Was he pretending to forget that night? Did he ever remember the moment randomly in my presence like I did?

I had to stop freaking out. It had been months!

Where was Grayson.

I locate my fiancé in a random group but his eyes are already on me. I raise a hand and he smiles, raising a finger to tell me he’d be there in a moment.

My mind races in the meantime, wondering if I should mention the incident to Harry and tell him I was fine. Or maybe that proved the opposite. No. I should just keep it unspoken like we had this whole time. Oh my god!

“Quite a turnout,” Grayson comes back to me. Two drinks in his hand. “I saw you talking to Harry why did you look so scared? Did he say something?”

“Oh!” Of course Gray saw. “No. I just…almost choked on my champagne the fizz y’know? And then I didn’t want to make a scene so I left.”

“Hm,” Gray wraps his hand around my waist. “Hey I see a mistletoe I’m going to nudge you in that direction.”

“You don’t need a mistletoe to kiss me babe.”

“It’s supposed to be romantic.”

I let him lead me to it and he kisses me with a knee-bending passion.

“Woah,” I feel dazed when we finally part. “That was fucking romantic.”

“Yeah?” He grins.

“Excuse me!” Harry’s voice rings over the crowd and the room hushes slowly. “Uh hiya! Thank you all for coming tonight and making me feel like I have friends during the holidays.”

A quiet laugh rumbles over the crowd. Harry looks magnetic on his makeshift podium, he’s in a cozy red sweater that I know cost more than my month’s salary and a collar peeks out from under it. He’s got on navy slacks and tinsel thrown over his shoulder. I’d bought that sweater, I remember. But he managed to pull the rest of the outfit together well.

“…a few people.” He continues. I’d zoned out. “My manager Jeff of course—this year has been a roller coaster and you’ve managed it all. Charlie, Claire, Niji, Elin, Sarah, and Mitch. We had a ball playing our hidden shows this fall but we have so much planned for the year ahead. I’m beyond grateful that you all came into my life and we get to make music together!”

A few whoops in the crowd and the people he mention raise their hands and shout out their own praises to Harry.

Harry thanks a few more people and says some more kind words. I don’t expect him to zero in on me.

“Last, but not least folks, I want to thank somebody who joined my team this year. She’s seen a lot—she’s been in the trenches my friends, she has. But she’s stuck with me. She’s planned everything tonight so really you’re all here because of her. Y/N, please make yourself known and everyone should give her a thank you if you talk to her tonight for tonight.”

Oh god. I am as bright as Harry’s sweater and with every single eye turning on me I’m sure I also turn every shade of the rainbow. I paste on a grin that feels like I’m the Joker and hope it looks normal.

I wave awkwardly and make eyes with Harry across the room who looks like he’s having a ball putting me in the centre of everyone’s attention. I was really going to wring his neck but he winks at me and finally turns the attention back to him with a few closing words, then starting the music and food.

“Am I alive?” I ask Gray beside me whose hand had dropped from my waist during the last few minutes. “I think I died of embarrassment and turned into the ghost of Christmas’ present.”

I turn to Gray and he looks around me. “Hello? Is someone talking to me?”

“Gray!” I push his shoulder and he laughs. “I hated every second of that.”

“I know,” Gray laughs again. “You hate attention.”

“I do! I swear Harry was up there gloating didn’t you notice? Ugh I hate him.”

Gray’s expression shutters for a second. “Yeah, he definitely knew what he was doing.”

“Y/N, quite a shoutout.” A voice says from my right. It’s Liam who I hadn’t seen myself in ages. I go in for a hug and hope my embarrassment clears away as we catch up.

As the night goes on I ease up a little, enjoy the mingling and the drinks. Especially the drinks. The evening’s embarrassment and everyone coming up to me knowing my name was hell so I drink to keep up the liquid courage.

Coming out of the toilets for the tenth time that night with all the drinks I was downing, I notice a light on in the room.

I go to it, in case it was a guest in a place they shouldn’t be.

I don’t spot him at first, flicking off the lights only to see a shadow move. Harry.

“Oh! It’s you. Is everything alright?” I lean in the doorway. It’s the first time I’ve seen him in this office actually. He always hovered outside it like I was now.

“Yeah yeah, just came for some air.” He walks up to me and I step out of the way so he can leave. But he stays just inside so I move back to my spot.

“Air? In the smallest room here?”

“Yeah,” he smiles like he’s been caught. “I was looking for you. We ran out of ice I just don’t remember where you stored the rest.”

“Well I’m not working remember? So I don’t know.”

“Touché. I guess the guests will just have a shite time with their lukewarm drinks.”

Ugh. He knew me too well.

“Fine. I’ll get the bag. By the way, that wasn’t funny. What you did earlier.” I put my hands on my hips, ready to give him a piece of my mind for embarrassing me.

“What!? It wasn’t meant to be funny. I’m expressing my gratitude y/n.”

“In front of a whole room of random people who are all looking at me? You know I would have hated it!”

“Let’s just say I’m trying to get you out of your shell,” Harry teases. He smells of his usual cologne, the fresh soap he used, and scotch. I spot the empty glass on my desk.

“I’m plenty out of my shell thank you. You know, you could have just said it to me privately. That would have meant more.”

His mouth opens but nothing comes out. He inhales sharply and turns around.

“What?” I ask his back.

“Nothing.” He turns back around. “You do good work y/n, people should know.”

Now it’s my turn to go quiet. I only seemed to do this when Harry was nice. Because otherwise I knew how mean he could be. Why couldn’t there just be a balance.

“Why are you so randomly nice to me?”

Oops. All those drinks made for some loose lips.

“What?” He’s taken aback.

“Yeah,” I feel fired up now that it’s out. “You ignore me half the time—not that I expect to be bffs but at least a hello now and then would be nice. Then when you do talk it’s grunts and clipped answers. You’re pretty mean to me! And suddenly out of nowhere it’s like-like this 180 and you’re really nice. And praising me in front of a crowd. What’s up with that?”

His expression retreats the more I talk and I know I’ve dug myself into a hole. Forget the whole speech just now I’m pretty sure I’ve just written my own termination notice.

“I have to be,” he says simply after an awkward pause.

“Have to?” I demand. “You have to be mean to me?”

The long deleted Dos and Dont list when I first joined flashes through my mind. Did that have something to do with it?

“Because when I spoke to Riley that one time for drinks, he told me you weren’t always this mean. So is it me? You just said to a whole crowd how helpful I am so I just don’t get why you’re so mean sometimes!”

“What else did Riley say?” Harry hangs on to that.

“I…a lot I dunno! Riley faffs a lot. He’s also a creep but that’s neither here nor there I-“

“What do you mean he’s a creep?” The room feels even smaller as he zeroes in.

“I-“ I try to stutter something to change the subject but he stays on, asking me again. “It’s nothing. He was drunk and he made a pass at me-“

“He did?! Why didn’t you tell me?” There’s zero space between the two of us now.

“Why would I? It was something that happened outside work hours, plus you warned me and I didn’t listen-“

“Y/n you should have told me,” he swears. “I let that little shite get away with way too much.”

“Yeah well he’s not the only person working here who’s made a drunken pass at me so let’s not make it a big deal okay?”

I guess I wasn’t holding back.

Harry closes his eyes and breathes through his nose. One mississippi two mississippi three-

“You’re right.”

My heart pounds in my chest. I want to get out of this room, find Gray, and stay in the light. Because this small, dimly lit space was becoming too intimate. And yet, I can’t seem to will myself to move.

“I am?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry. It doesn’t cut it—what I did was incredibly wrong. Being drunk shouldn’t be an excuse and I promise I don’t go around doing that to everyone-“

“I know,” I say before thinking. It was weird of Harry to do but I never felt unsafe with him. I understood what he was trying to say.

“You can make it a big deal if you want. It shouldn’t have happened. It won’t happen again.”

I feel weird having the roles reversed—Harry apologizing to me. Promising not to do something again. I recognize what he’s doing is right but I don’t know what to do with myself. My breathing’s shallow with Harry so close to me, practically hovering over me. I should’ve worn higher heels to really equal the field.

“Thanks,” I finally manage. It’s low and raspy and I barely get in enough air to speak it. He doesn’t respond.

We stay in the tableau, our breathing irregular, in between a single decision that both of us knew wouldn’t end well. Yet neither of us are strong enough to end the frozen display.

“You clean up nice,” he says, eyes never leaving mine as he compliments my getup. I’d worn a simple cowl-necked slip dress and strappy shoes with my hair in an up-do. I was definitely underdressed after seeing the other guests but I believe Harry means it.

“Don’t look as haggard as I usually do, you mean?” I find my voice again. I barely have to whisper for him to hear.

“You never look haggard,” Harry says as he brings his hand up and traces the curve of my dress strap. My heartbeat was loud and surely showing through my dress.

“You should go,” Harry adds in a whisper.

My head feels like it’s filled with carbonation as I nod in agreement. This was bad. With a capital B. I had to go.

“I…should go.” I repeat. Slowly I inch sideways on the wall and Harry leans away. We stare at each other for another long moment before I scurry away, my heart in my throat and my guilt where my heart should be.

“Don’t forget the ice,” I hear Harry call out from the room. Miraculously this is exactly when Grayson turns the corner.

“Y/n? Where were you?”

“Oh I-“ I imagined I looked fucked up. Because I felt high and out of my mind. The white lie comes out, attached to a thread that unstitches something within. “I drank too much, so I was in the toilet.”

“Oh,” Gray looks relieved and I’m sinking with guilt. Technically I did nothing wrong. I didn’t even have feelings for Harry. But whatever physical magnetism he seemed to have nearly made me do something I’d seriously regret. “Did I hear someone say something about ice?”

“Yeah!” I laugh and it comes out like I had never learned how. “I just bumped into Harry, we ran out of ice. So much for not working huh?”

“At least everyone knows how hard you work,” he jokes.

I stick to Gray’s side for the rest of the night, not touching a single drop of alcohol. I had to forget everything in that room ever happened if I wanted to keep my job and my sanity. I had to be a better person, the devil was handsome and I had to stop playing into his tricks.

I call it quits a few hours later when I notice Gray low on energy.

“I’ll get our coats,” I tell him. The relief on his face is palpable.

I go through where the spare closet was but hear voices in Harry’s darkened room. The door’s open so I go to investigate. I regret it instantly.

Harry’s inside with a woman, I don’t see much of her as she’s on the bed but I know it’s Harry with the tone of his voice as they exchange words.

My stomach drops and it’s like an accident on the side of the road, I’m mortified but I can’t look away.

I watch him kiss her and I feel like I’m sinking through the floorboards.

“Oh!” The woman notices me when she turns her head and pulls the sheet up. She whispers, “you didn’t close the-“

“Oh it’s fine,” Harry laughs. He sits back on his legs and looks at me, his expression void of anything he was tonight. Like the moment in the room didn’t even happen. “It’s just y/n.”

Of course it didn’t matter to him, I scold myself. I was the one with fucked up issues that couldn’t make up my stupid mind about how I wanted to feel about this man who literally paid me to be around. Who treated me like shit most of the time. Who was nice to me sometimes and I misconstrued it to mean a whole lot more.

What was I thinking? Did I think suddenly this man who’s known to be a player had a single one-sided intense moment with me and that would change him?

I was an absolute idiot.

“Could you get the door?” Harry asks so casually, so nonchalantly, that it punches me in the chest. It was closer to some combination of humiliation and self-inflicted hurt but for now it feels like my chest aches.

“O-of course.” I shut the door and stand there, taking in deep breaths as I try not to think about everything that just happened. Tried not to think of all the million ways I was the worst girlfriend in the world. Tried not to think about the fact that I had to quit sooner than later because things were getting tangled up and it was not okay.

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TAGLIST: @boomitsallie1 @indierockgirrl @ndunad @jerseygirlinca @sunshinemoonsposts @ninasw0rld

I’m trying to make part 3 the last—it includes your final decisions and returning to the present to find out what happens (from the beginning of the story). Thank you, as always, for reading <3 xx

#harry styles fic #writingsfromhome #harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles #fic #harry styles angst #harry styles series #musician!harry #slow burn

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