#which is mostly my fault i should have seen that coming

[totentnz]

babies!! more under the cut

[moonkhao]

hi.

[orcasoul]

Not My Man

Summary: Joel is accused of abusing you, and, oh hell no! You're having none of that!

Warnings: Swearing, injury, implied domestic abuse, use of Y/N.

Word Count: 4,132

"Ow, shit! That really stings." You wince and pull your head back as Joel lightly dabs a alcohol soaked cloth over your cheek. His hand slides behind your head pulling you back in, keeping you in place. "Quit squirming and it'll be done quicker," he tells you firmly yet softly, his big chestnut eyes fixed intently on the task at hand. You grudgingly obey, - keeping still despite the the burn of the alcohol seeping into the raw cut across your cheek - holding an ice pack over your eye on the opposite side. You just know it'll be black by tomorrow.

"How's the head? Feeling dizzy or sick at all?" It's the millionth time Joel has asked you this, and every time you have to reassure him. "I'm okay, Joel. Really," you stressed, but you can see the guilt and anger simmering within him flicker to the surface every time you try to make light of it all. "I shouldn't have let you go off alone. Fucking hell... if I'd been just a few seconds later you'd be-" Joel closes his eyes and breathes in deeply, both to calm his nerves and to avoid having to finish that sentence. Just the thought of losing you makes Joel want to rip his hair out in vexation.

"It's my fault," you try to reason, cupping Joels' scruffy cheek and forcing his eyes to meet yours. "I should have been paying closer attention. Don't you dare go blaming yourself." "You're never leaving my sight again," Joel declared, his voice low and determined. "Joel-" "I mean it Y/N! From now on when we're outside these walls I'm gonna be on your ass like your shadow!" You sigh, knowing there's no getting to through to Joel when he gets like this. So, you silently concede with a nod, mostly for his peace of mind.

After applying some antiseptic cream and a large plaster, Joel leans in to press a featherlight kiss over the sensitive gash and rests his forehead against yours, closing his eyes. "I could have lost you today, sweetheart." The ache in his voice stirred a deep ache in your chest in return. You place your hands over his own, which are now cradling your face. "But you didn't, and that's all that matters." It crushes your heart to see Joel so torn up over something no one could have seen coming, over something he couldn't have known.

But, here he is again; blaming himself for circumstances beyond his control. All you can do is comfort him and try to make him focus on the here and now and not on the "what could have been". Easier said that done, though when your mind keeps replaying that dreadful encounter. You could kick yourself for letting your guard down.

You and Joel had started to take Ellie out to prepare her for patrol duty, now that she'd turned 18. A small town about 5 miles west of Jackson seemed like the best option, given that the place mostly remained infected free at this time of year. Most of the wooden houses had collapsed in on themselves over the past two decades. Only brick buildings had survived the ravages of time and the elements, and even some of them looked to be on their last legs. Once it appeared the three of you were alone you'd proposed you split up to inspect the last few unchecked buildings, just to get it over with ASAP. The sooner you were all done, the sooner you could all get home and stop freezing your asses off out here.

Joel, of course, objected immediately but you brushed off his concern, insisting it was safe enough. Famous last words! While Joel and Ellie searched an old bank building, you'd turned you attention to a restaurant next door. You entered slowly, gun raised in front of you, head turning in every direction, ears pricked for any indication of company. The crunch of broken glass underfoot was deafening in the eerie silence.

As the moments wore on, you began to feel less tense, there being no signs of raiders or loners passing through, and if there were any infected in here, surely they'd have heard the scraping of glass as you'd entered. A thorough scan of the dining and kitchen area revealed no danger, luling you into a false sense of security. You absentmindedly lower your gun as you make your way to back room, which you assumed was an office. All you could think about was the hot bath awaiting you later on as you opened the door and walked through.

It all happened so fast after that. A ear splitting scream echoed through the room and before you could even turn to face it, you are tackled from behind, both yourself and the rotting corpse on your back tumbling over a desk and landing with a hard thud on the floor. The impact of your head hitting the ground sent the room spinning around you, but even through the haze, your body reacted instinctively, pushing the furious creature away from you by it's shoulders. It's putrid breath and brown teeth almost made you gag as you fought desperately to keep it's searching fungal tentacles away from your face.

You let out the loudest scream you possibly could, hoping Joel and Ellie would hear. Your gun had gotten lost during the skirmish so all you had to rely on right now was your own strength, which was waning by the second. Just when you felt like you couldn't hold out any longer a gunshot split the air and the infected fell to the side of you in a heap. Through the ringing in your ears you could hear Joel's frantic voice calling your name, his hands grabbing and pulling at you, checking you over for bites. "Holy shit! Is she alright? Is she bit?" Ellie asked breathlessly from over Joel's shoulder. "No, no... she's not bit. She's fine," Joel sighed in relief.

The fog in your head cleared, bringing you back to yourself and that's when you noticed how much your body hurt. A dull ache settled in your ribs where you'd landed, your head felt like it would explode at any moment and your cheek and opposite eye socket throbbed continuously. A warm, tickling sensation ghosted along your cheek. When you pulled your fingers away they were red and sticky. You can't even remember hitting your face on anything in all the commotion. "Joel..." you whimper, body trembling from fear and adrenaline. Before you could say another word, Joel pulled you into his arms, holding you against his chest in a crushing bear hug, a chorus of "You're safe, sweetheart" and "I've got you" repeating over and over.

You're snapped from the memory by Joel's weary sigh. "It's my job to protect you and I nearly failed... again." You're heart sank on his last word, knowing exactly what he meant by "again". Pulling back, you gently cup Joel's face in both hands, staring compassionately into his tormented eyes.

"Don't do that, honey. Please. It was my fault." you asserted, shaking your head. "I suggested we split up, I let my guard down. That's on me." Joel released a small, humourless laugh, clearly not about to relinquish any of the blame and it guts you; to see what your carelessness has caused. "But do you know what's all on you?" you ask, your tone softening. Joel shot you a quizzical look. You wave a hand over the front of your body, Joel's gaze following your gesture.

"Me... here, alive and well. You saved my life today. If it wasn't for you I'd be dead... or worse," you shudder at the thought. "So, you see, you didn't almost fail. You saved me and I love you for it." Joel exhaled long and slow, a small smile lifting the corner of his mouth. Joel lifted his hand to caress the back of your head and pulled you towards his face. His soft lips pressed against yours in a deep, lingering kiss. "I love you too, sweetheart, so damn much!"

The next morning as you, Joel and Ellie made your way towards the mess hall for breakfast, you can't help but notice the stares from passers-by. You were right about the black eye; the deep purple hue had bloomed overnight, the swelling causing your eyelid to slightly droop and a few bruises decorated your jaw. Even the area surrounding the bandage on your cheek was flushed red. You must be quite the spectacle right now. After collecting your food, the three of you joined Tommy and Maria at their table, as you do every morning, but this morning something felt... off.

A few times you could have sworn you'd heard yours and Joel's names mentioned in hushed tones, heads turning away from you quickly as you glance around. Joel and Tommy, being so deep in conversation, remained oblivious to the odd atmosphere, and Ellie was too busy shovelling food in her mouth - like it was her last ever meal - to pay attention to her surroundings. Maria, however picked up on your unease, also noticing the excessive looks and whispers in the hall. She looked to you, eyebrows raised in silent question, to which, you could only shrug in response.

Once you had finished your meal, you got up to take your tray to the used area, setting it down on the pile. Just as you turned to walk away you hear your name being called by Millie - one of the serving ladies. With her short, dumpy stature and short grey hair, she gave off the classic warm granny vibe. She's also a renowned gossip around town. "Are you okay, dear?" she asked in a breathy whisper. "Um... yeah?" You weren't really sure what she meant at first. When you noticed her concerned eyes darting all over your face you suddenly remember how ghastly you look. "Oh this..." you wave at your face, casually. "I got jumped by an infected yesterday. Knocked my face pretty bad but I'll be fine."

Millie didn't answer for a few seconds, her eyes flicking to your table, then back to you. "Are you sure?" she finally spoke, even quieter than before. "Of course." you tilt your head, wondering why she's acting so weird. "It's just..." Millie bit her bottom lip, nervously. "If you need someone to-" "Millie? Can you help me out in her for a minute?" came a shout from the kitchen. "I've got to go. You take care," she smiled sympathetically before rushing off into the kitchen, leaving you bewildered. "What the hell was that?" you muttered under your breath before returning to your seat.

Later that afternoon you were alone in the house when you heard a knock on the door. Maria stood on the other side, and one look at her face told you this isn't a social call. "Hi, can I speak to you?" she asked. "Sure, come in." You opened the door fully and stood aside, allowing her in. "Is everything okay?" you asked sitting on the settee opposite her. "Maybe I should be asking you that." "What?" Maria cleared her throat and shifted, uncomfortably. "Is... everything okay... between you and Joel?" "What do you mean? Why would there be something wrong?" you queried, taken aback at such an abrupt question.

"Look, if you don't feel safe enough to talk about it-" "Talk about what? What exactly are you insinuating?" You don't like how this sounds one little bit, but you want to hear her say it before you possibly jump to conclusions. Maria sat forward, looking you dead in the eye. "Y/N... did Joel do this to you?" There it is; what you were hoping she wasn't going to say. "Of course he fucking didn't!" You sprang to your feet, fists clenched at your sides. "You know what happened. I reported it yesterday when we got back!" "I know but-" "How could you even think Joel would do such a thing!" Maria raised her hands in a show of surrender.

"I'm sorry. It's just I heard he might have been... hurting you and as a member of the council I had to investigate. I'm also your friend," she continued, "and I just had be be sure." You can feel the blood in your veins boiling as the seconds tick by. "Who the hell has been spreading bullshit like that?!" "There have been rumours going around-" "Rumours!" you scoff. "And you believed them?" Maria stood up slowly, counteracting your indignation with calmness. "I'm not saying I believe them-" "It's obvious you do or why would you be here?"

"I just needed to know. We both know that Joel can be volitile-" "Oh trust me, I know how Joel can be. I travelled across the country with him, remember. I know what he's capable of and I also know what he would NEVER do! He'd never hurt anyone he loves. Your head is now throbbing from the anger bubbling under your skin, but you just can't stop yourself. "He's never laid a finger on me or Ellie and I won't have anyone spreading vicious lies like that!' "He's killed innocent people before. How can you be sure one day he won't-" That's fucking it, the last straw!

"Do you trust Tommy?! Do you fear what he might do one day?" you throw back at her, sarcastically. "Because Tommy killed innocent people too, or have you conveniently forgotten that?" Maria's demeanour hardened slightly at your judgement of her husband. Good. Now she knows how it feels. "Tommy was just following Joel's lead." "Oh don't give me that bullshit!" you snapped in frustration. "He's a grown ass man capable of making his own decisions, and he chose to do that. You can't keep making excuses for him, but still hold it against Joel." Maria remained silent, seeming to realise the truth of your words. You inhale a calming breath before continuing.

"Maria, you've got to let go of this constant animosity you feel for Joel. Yes, he's made some wrong choices in the past, but he's not that man anymore... just like Tommy isn't. And wether you like it or not he's your family now. If not for Joel's sake, do it for Tommy's. Joel means the world to him and you know it." After a few tense seconds Maria nodded slowly, looking slightly abashed. "I'm sorry. Really, I am. As a council member it's my job to keep the peace in Jackson, so I had to ask..." she steps closer to you, taking your hand in hers.

"As your friend, I believe you. I can see how much you love Joel. No one would be so fiercely protective over someone who hurt them." Your shoulders sag as the tension drains away. "Thank you." "You also make a fair point," Maria says. "It's true I've never been Joels biggest fan, and maybe I have been a bit harsh on him," she rubbed the back of her neck, awkwardly. "I'm sorry. I'll try to... make things right with him, I promise." You squeeze her hand back. "That's all I ask."

"So, we'll see you tomorrow for breakfast?" The sincerity and hope in her voice, softened you up a bit. "Sure, see you then," you smiled at her. Maria began to walk towards the door but stopped when you called her name. "If you hear anymore gossip-" "I'll be sure to set the record straight," She interjected. "Thank you." When the door closed and you were alone once again, you slumped back down into the settee, leaning your head over the back, bringing your hands to your face in exasperation.

The weak winter sun began to dip behind the mountains, casting looming shadows in the streets of Jackson. Joel was due home from maintenance duty any minute, so you put the kettle on to make him a cup of coffee before you head out together for dinner at the mess hall. Worry had been plaguing you all afternoon. You just hope word of these rumours hasn't reached joel's ears. As Joel entered the house - tired but otherwise in good spirits - you felt your worry settle, knowing he's none the wiser or he would have, rightfully, been a murderous mood.

The last thing you want is for Joel to have to deal with hearsay from sad busybodies with nothing better to do with their lives. If you can discreetly nip this in the bud without Joel having to know, that would be for the best. Joel sauntered into the living room after kicking his boots off, sitting down with a groan. Even though his back ached and knees creaked, he relished in the deep satisfaction that came at the end of a hard day's work. He never though he'd have the opportunity to live a normal ( well, as close to normal as you can get) life again.

Instead of smuggling and scraping to get by on a day to day basis, he now has the chance to do something honest and meaningful, and he'll never take that for granted again. "Hey honey," you greeted joel as you sat next to him, handing him his favourite tawny owl mug. "Thanks, darlin'," he smiled and kissed your forehead. You watched as he closed his eyes, savouring the rich flavour of coffee as he swallowed. "You look tired," your voice was a gentle whisper as you ran your fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck, knowing how it soothes him. "I'm okay," he said, stifling a yawn.

"How are you feeling? Any pain?" Joel gently brushed your hair behind your ear, examining your your face. "I'm fine. The swelling's actually starting to go down now." Joel smiled, relieved. He still blames himself for what happened but any indication that you're recovering is music to his ears. "MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLES!" You both jumped half a mile in the air as Ellie barged through the front door, slamming it so hard behind her the whole thing rattled. "Whoa, whoa, easy. What happened?!"

Joel rushed over to Ellie, his shoulders tensing and fists balling. You've seen that posture many times on the journey here. A posture that screams "I will kill anyone who hurt you". "Stupid people running their fucking mouths. That's what fucking happened!" Ellie seethed as she ripped her jacket off and flung it on the floor. Oh god, Ellie. Please don't! "What the hell ya goin' on about?" Joel drawled, his Texan accent thickening as it always does when he's upset. "Oh you didn't hear? Well, you would have soon enough. People have been going around saying you gave Y/N those bruises."

"What the fuck?!" Joel roared, the muscles in his shoulders and arms visibly straining as anger flooded his body. Joel looked back to you, a mixture of disbelief and fury contorting his features. You dash over to him, resting a hand on his arm in support. "Joel, please ca-" "What the hell is wrong with people!" he continued to rant looking between you and Ellie. He felt sick to his stomach that anyone would even entertain the idea the he would hurt you. "I'll fucking kill whoever said that," he mumbled in an ominously dangerous tone as he began pacing back and forth. "I'll rip their goddamn tongues out for them. I'll make sure-"

"Joel!" Reaching out, you grab both of his shoulders, forcing him to stop and snap out of this manic descent he had slipped into. When his eyes landed on yours, the darkness swirling within them, melted away, replaced with a devastation that almost made you cry. Joel brought his hands to cup your face. "Darlin', you know I'd never do that." "You don't have to tell me that, honey." Joel brushed a thumb over your cheek, sighing and shaking his head. "Did you know?" You nod, pressing your lips together in a thin line. "Yeah. I was hoping to put an end to it without you having to know."

"What do you mean?" Joel asked, his brow furrowing. "Maria came by earlier..." Joels face slid into a cold stare. "Of course she did," he huffed with disdain. "Oh don't worry, honey. I had a few choice words for her. I told her, well, practically screamed at her that you'd never do such a thing. And if she hears anymore talk, to shut it down." "Even when the world goes to shit, people still love a gossip," Joel spat the last word out like it was a bad taste on his tongue. "So, did she believe any of it?" he asked, his expression hardening once more.

"I think at first she did." Joel rolled his eyes. "But after I corrected her," - you emphasized the word corrected - "She believed me." Joel huffed with scepticism. "Joel, I don't want you to worry about this okay. I'll take care of it." "We both will!" Ellie, who'd been watching the whole exchange in silent anger, piped up. "We're not gonna let them drag your name through the mud. I'll make them fucking eat it first!" You couldn't help but chuckle at Ellie's choice of words.

"Ellie, as much as I would love to see that... and help you, we can't just go around roughing people up. There's rules here for a reason, unfortunately," you muttered the last part under your breath. "So... what? We just sit back and let them slander Joel!" Ellie threw her hands in the air in irritation. "Absolutely not!" you retorted, determination settling into your voice." We show them just how wrong they are." Joel placed his hands on his hips, a typical stance for him when he's stressed. "And how exactly do we do that?" he asked, sounding defeated.

"By presenting a united front. We make them see how strong and happy we are, all of us..." You look to Ellie, then back to Joel. "We show them there's nothing to hide or be ashamed of, and then they'll have nothing to yap about." Taking Joel's hand, you give it a reassuring squeeze. "And if I hear just one more person bad mouthing you, I'll make sure they regret it." Joel's face softend into a grateful smile. He's not convinced he's worth such loyalty and devotion, but he can't deny the warmth spreading through his chest at the thought of his girls so eager to defend him. It's an odd feeling for him, as he's used to being the protector. He could secretly get used to this.

"It'll be okay. I promise," you say, not letting go of Joel's hand. "We've got your back, old man." Ellie slapped Joel on the back, drawing a chuckle from him. "Not that old, you little shit," he replied in mock offense. "Now... let's go," You moved to grab your coat and boots. "The mess hall is open and I'm starving."

On the way to dinner, you found yourself paying close attention to everyone you passed, noticing a few side eye glances and disapproving looks. And every time, you pulled Joel's arm further around your shoulder and nestled closer into his side, a silent sign to the doubters that you feel no fear or discomfort in his embrace, as you would expect from an abused victim. Dinner wasn't as bad as you were expecting. Maybe Maria's influence with the townsfolk is to thank for that.

However a few inevitable glimpses were thrown in your direction. A middle aged couple made the mistake of allowing their eyes to linger on you for too long as they passed your table and you just couldn't let that slide. "Something you want to say to us?" you narrowed your eyes at them, daring them to open their mouths. Joel's arm snaked it's way around your waist, his jaw ticking as he too, stared them down. The woman's colour left her puffy face, while her husband forced a placating smile.

"Um... uh no, no." You smiled smugly at the alarm the old man was trying and failing to keep from his voice. "Good. keep it that way," Joel growled. The nervous couple looked at one another and hurried on by. Ellie smirked, "Fuck yeah, man! That's how it's done." "Damn right," you agreed, triumphantly. You could feel Joel's whole body relax around you and you gave him a "we've got this" look.

It may take longer than you'd like for all this nonsense to die down, but no matter how long it takes, you'll prove Joel's innocence, one way or another. You remember a saying from "Before"; "it's not all men", and if it's the last thing you do, you're going to make damn sure everyone knows it's certainly not your man!

[franksoceanwrld]

ABOUT A GIRL

modern!aegon targaryen x fem!reader

notes: based on the song about a girl by nirvana. i don’t know what else to say, but enjoy!! also if you have a request i can do it! and should i do a part two?

summary: you were helaena’s best friend, ever since you guys were little. you were basically apart of the family. but then her brother aegon knocks on your door crying.

warning (s): sad boy aegon, alicent is a bad mother in this, reader is in college, so is aegon & helaena. parent issues, it’s pretty wholesome.

masterlist.

You heard banging on your front door, you sat up groggy looking at your phone to see what time it was.

2:23am

you we’re currently home alone, your parents had taken their much needed vacation, away from you? you didn’t know.

you got out of bed, putting on some shorts and walked downstairs as the frantic knocks on the door began louder and louder. you looked into the peep hole and saw a crying aegon, that was odd.

you were his sister’s best friend, helaena ever since elementary school. the targaryens were a very wealthy family, everyone knew that. you used to have a massive crush on aegon until he began not caring about anyone, throwing himself into smoking, girls, and etc.

you were now in college with helaena, you were majoring in music, something you’d loved since you were little.

aegon had majored in business something his mother had forced him into, following in the targaryen family ways.

helaena’s other brother, aemond was a freshman in college, he mostly kept to himself and you didn’t really see much of him. though you’d seen him bring only one girl home, alys rivers. he had lost one of his eyes due to an accident with his nephew which caused that side of the family distance themselves away.

daeron the youngest brother, was still in highschool. you didn’t know much of him as alicent had sent him oldtown with her side of the family.

you didn’t really have a problem with alicent, you knew she was trying her hardest, especially with aegon. she’d constantly yell at aegon for him for slacking off at school, when he should have been focusing on school.

then their father viserys, like daeron you didn’t really know much of him. he’d been sick and isolated for as long as you’d remember, you’d only see him in events or parties the family hosted, but he seemed to look worse each time.

you wouldn’t say you were distant from aegon, yes you tried to distance yourself from him but he seemed to pop up everywhere. the two of you would bond over music, mostly nirvana as that was his favorite band.

you opened the door, “aegon? what are you doing here? are you okay?” you asked him, seeing his tears and how he struggled to breath.

“can i come in?” aegon gasped out, sobbing even more that he saw your face.

“uh-y-yea..” you nodded, you were still half asleep. you let him in, the man nodded.

aegon walked in and shut the door behind him, wiping the tears from his eyes. he was breathing heavily, almost to the point of having a panic attack.

he walked himself to your kitchen, sitting on one of the stools and putting his head into his hands, he was a wreck. you knew it was probably alicent fault, per usual but it was never this bad.

you let out an exhale and followed him to the kitchen, leaning against the counter, staring at him cry into his hands.

“i-im sorry for coming here…i-didn’t know where else to go.” he spoke between sobs, his voice was shaky.

you let out a silent yawn, “no, it’s fine..”

after a few seconds aegon’s sobs quieted down, into sniffs. he looked up at you, his eyes were bloodshot and their were visible signs of tears on his cheeks.

“what happened…” i slowly walked into him, hugging yourself, you hadn’t even realized that you were in a tank top and shorts.

aegon let out an exhale, looking down at his hands, which were picked at: a habit he had gained from alicent, helaena had told you. “i-it’s alicent..she found out…i failed first semester of one of my classes….i-she got mad-and yelled at me..and called me a disappointment to the f-family and i was u-useless..that was i was n-no so-son of her-” he stopped mid sentence, sounding as if he was about to cry again.

“aeg….” you whispered, stepping closer to him.

“it-its….she’s just so fucking mean…” aegon let out a sob again, burying his hands in his face again.

you looked at aegon sobbing again. you were almost going to call helaena but she’d probably be sleeping. you’d never see aegon like this ever. you’d normally want to distance yourself away from him, but you couldn’t: not that he was like this.

you stepped to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “it’s okay….” you rubbed his back, trying to give him comfort that he seemed to long for.

aegon didn’t lift his head up, but his sobs got more louder, he was not used to this comfort, his siblings would try and comfort him but that was different.

the comfort with you, he felt a actual comfort with you, he never admit it but…..he liked it. he didn’t want to go back home, he felt safe with you.

“it’s okay…” you whispered again, this time aegon didn’t care if he overstepped it with you, he hugged you, loosely wrapping his arms around your waist.

.·:*¨¨* ���☆≈ *¨¨*:·.

aegon had stayed with you that night, slept in your bed. he’d asked to sleep on the couch, but you denied, you felt bad for him and the both of you slept in your king sized bed. you felt guilty almost, helaena was your best friend but you shared a bed with her troubled brother, whom she’d lost many friends because of him.

you opened your eyes, feeling your phone going off. you picked up your phone and saw helaena calling you, you were looked at the screen before you answered her, you knew that aegon hadn’t come home last night, and they probably were asking around.

“hello?” you asked, your voice filled with sleep.

“hey, mom and aegon had a bad fight last night. he left and isn’t back home..do you know where he is?” helaena’s soft voice spoke out, her voice filled with distress, worried for her sibling.

you stayed silent, helaena knew your silence was her answer, you’d been best friends with her for too many years to count. “he came crying to my door last night…” you told her, you couldn’t lie to your best friend, especially not helaena.

there was a sigh of relief, “he’s there? he’s okay?”

“yea…he’s okay.” you sat up, looking at the man on the bed beside you, his eyes were slightly puffy and red around them.

“mom is worried. she thinks he’s dead in a ditch somewhere….can i talk to him?” helaena asked, her soft softer and less distressed.

“he’s asleep, maybe you should come to my house.” you spoke, getting off the bed, and leaving your bedroom.

“i’ll be there in a few.” helaena spoke and ended the call.

you were left in silence again, walking to the living room and sat on the couch.

after a few minutes there was a knock on the door and it opening, helaena had a key to your house. you stood up and walked to her and hugged her.

“i was worried something bad happened to him.” helaena spoke, her face buried in your morning hair.

“i was worried last night, i’d never seen him so upset.” you pulled back from the hug, looking at her.

“yeah…can we go see him? i assume he’s asleep.” helaena spoke, already walking upstairs to where she assumed he was.

you followed her, the stairs creaking as they walked up it. helaena opened your door and saw aegon still asleep, a little drool falling on your bed.

helaena let out a sigh of relief as she saw him and walked to the side of the bed, she shook his shoulder, “aeg?”

aegon groaned in his sleep, and opened his eyes, his eyes slightly red but better than last night, “hel? why are you here?”

“we were worried, we thought something bad happened to you…” helaena sat on the bed.

“i was fine..” aegon sat up, his shirt twisted from sleeping.

“we called you, texted you, even emailed you!” helaena raised her voice, angry and annoyed at him. you stood from the doorway looking at the both of them.

aegon glanced at you, before looking back at his sister. “my phone was dead.”

helaena let out a huff, before hugging her brother. “don’t you ever run away like that again!”

aegon was a little startled by her hug but, hugged her back, closing his eyes.

you watched the siblings hug, you were happy, helaena was the most caring out of all the siblings. you were just worried about what alicent would do or say to him.

[d3adlyromb3ar]

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。devil, meet angel

— pairing. choso x fem!reader

— synopsis. you were sent to exorcize him. upon meeting him, you can’t bring yourself to go through with it.

— word count. 2.2k

— warnings. angst, self hate, mental health issues, mentions of death, fluff, hurt/comfort, jjk violence, injuries, slight gore, suicidal ideation, choso just being a sweet boy we love him

main masterlist

You didn’t know what to think of him as he sat from afar, playing checkers with himself. It was both confusing and intriguing, and it pulled you closer towards him. Footsteps quiet and calculated.

If you were anything— it was stealthy. You could come and go as if you were never there, undetected like a ghost. Perhaps that’s how you got the nickname.

The Ghost.

His pale skin glowed, the porcelain like surface perfect— no flaws to be seen. The intricate markings among his face, complimenting the dark purple bags under his eyes. In an odd way— he was quite beautiful. Too beautiful to be a curse.

Almost as if he sensed you, his head slowly raised from the board and his eyes locked with yours.

The sudden realization that you had been caught watching— you felt glued to your spot. Staying as incredibly still— hoping you’d blend in with your environment. But at last, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes squinted upon your watchful gaze.

You were prepared to exorcize him, energy pulsing beneath your palms— the buzzing sensation itching to release. With calculated steps, you inched closer to the man.

Your first step had his eyes squinting even more, his expression mostly unchanging.

Why was I approaching this curse? I should exorcize it immediately— no questions. You thought.

Keeping your steps even and slow— you had made it closer to him. Standing a good ten feet away. Looking into his eyes, now that you were closer— you were shocked to find such emotion within them.

You weren’t even sure if he knew how expressive his eyes were.

Swallowing nervously all of a sudden, you raised your chin— false confidence.

“You know why I’m here.” You started.

Somewhere in the back of your mind wondered why you were creating small talk with something you were meant to exorcize. Maybe it was simply a way to make exorcising curses more interesting— or perhaps it was the way he didn’t show any signs to fight.

The man looked you up and down, his face stuck on a neutral— almost bored expression. But his eyes, they spoke for him.

“Guess I do.” He responded, his voice low and gravelly.

You felt an awkward tug at your chest— unsure of what more to say. Unsure if you should exorcize him without another word.

“Just like that? Thought you’d at least put up a fight.” You wondered out loud.

Your words had the man tilting his head, the checkers forgotten below him as he stood suddenly. His height making itself know, the distinct difference— that if he were to approach you now— he’d be towering over you.

“Why bother… at last I’ll be with my brothers.” He revealed.

His words were shocking, very human of him. It had your chest aching with hurt. Hurt for him.

“Your… your brothers?” You wondered, already having a suspicion.

The man closed his eyes for a moment before opening them to stare you down. His jaw set, his eyes furious but broken.

“They’re dead, because of your friends.” He spoke carefully.

Your heart throbbed painfully in your chest, the shame filling your body as you began to beat yourself up for something you didn’t do. But you couldn’t help but feel at fault.

The man noticed the twitch in her brow, the way her mouth turned down from his words. Her reaction was intriguing to him— wondering why she was taking so long to end him once and for all.

Loss was something you knew well— an unfortunate feeling that lingered amongst your entire life. It was only natural to feel for others that had to experience it as well. Which was why you found yourself speaking your next words to him.

“I’m sorry.”

The man stared at you in confusion, studying your expression. He was slightly disgusted to find your reaction genuine. But why?

“Wh-what…” He trailed off.

You closed your hands into fists, trying to restrain the energy you had previously built up. Desperate to bury it within you until it deem useful.

“Your brothers. I’m sorry you had to lose them.” You spoke quietly, unsure if you had a place to be sorry for him.

His eyes narrowed at you, his own hands tightening into fists now. But as you gazed upon him, and took in his body language— you still could not find any aggression.

Meanwhile, the man was confused why you— a sorcerer— was sending him your condolences. Was it confusion he felt within him, or was it appreciation?

That would be twisted— apologizing for something your friends were at fault of. He wanted to think, but couldn’t find it in himself to.

He could only nod in thanks, choosing he to stay silent as he got lost in his own thoughts. All surrounding you.

Suddenly, the guilt sensation began to wash over you in such a way you felt physically dirty. Your skin itched— your hands clammy as you kept them squeezed tight. The realization of what you were about to do— to someone who was mourning. Someone who clearly wasn’t exactly a curse. It was only the same reminder you’d get after every mission.

Who was the real monster?

You shivered with the thought that echoed loudly within you, and you held an opened hand to your chest. In hopes your heart would slow.

The man just watched, his eyes drinking in the scene before him. Wondering why you were in such a distraught state all of a sudden. It was the concern that bubbled within him, that had him clenching his jaw.

You turned and began to walk away, not uttering another word as you just needed to escape to hiding.

“Where are you going…” He muttered, loud enough for you to hear.

He knew you did, with how your body tensed and slowed their steps. Luckily, you turned to the side, able to look him in the eye.

“Forget that this ever happened. I never saw you, you never saw me.” You explained, voice shaky.

The man looked at you in confusion, in disbelief that you were sparing him— letting him live another day. That same foreign feeling washes through him, and suddenly his gaze was softening.

“I don’t understand.” He wondered out loud again.

You shook your head, forcing a smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

“You don’t need to.” You said lately, before turning away from him again.

This time you didn’t turn back around, and you kept walking with hurried steps until you found yourself crouched in a dark alley. Allowing the guilt to finally begin to eat away at you.

A part of you enjoyed this hell— a part of you feeling like you deserved such pain.

Meanwhile, Choso was trying to understand your reaction. He was hellbent on figuring out why you left, allowing him to live.

What a strange girl you are. He thought.

The small interaction between you and the man replayed in your mind. Causing you to be more distracted than usual, causing you to doubt your abilities— your purpose as a sorcerer. As of lately, it didn’t feel right. Exorcising curses didn’t feel satisfying.

Your mind wasn’t in the right place, and that’s how you ended up crawling away from the destruction of the battle. Bleeding out as you had let the curse you just exorcised, get the jump on you.

With agonizing pain, you eventually crawled your way far enough from the damage. Letting your form lean back against a brick wall. It was then you could assess yourself.

The open wound on your side was the most painful, the harsh throbbing— the sensation of the blood oozing out. It had you sweating, chest rising and falling quickly in attempts to stay conscious. You could feel the left side of your face start to burn, raising fingers to trace the outline of a cut. Starting from just above your eyebrow, dipping straight through the hairs and stopping just near your eye.

You hissed as your fingers pressed too hard on a tender spot.

Your body felt weak, exhausted as it racked up all the minor cuts and bruises— the weight of your injuries causing your eyes to droop.

This was it? Where was my phone? I should probably call for help. You thought helplessly.

Through all the pain, the questions that flew through your mind— one thought stuck out the most.

Maybe I deserved to die.

It was a sick way to be thinking, knowing how selfish it would be to give up now. People needed saving, they needed your help. But it felt impossible to find strength— any strength to keep your eyes open.

Your hand stayed tightly pressed against the wound on your side, desperate to keep the blood from oozing for however long you could. Your eyes were unfocused and staring at the ground.

There was no worse way to die, than dying alone.

Before you could drown in that thought, footsteps were heard approaching. Immediately you tensed up, glancing up quickly at your attacker.

Your breath got caught in your throat at the sight of… him again.

The same man who had taken up your headspace.

During your shock at seeing him, Choso gave himself a moment to study you. You were obviously hurt and in pain, your body battered to a pulp. He couldn’t understand why he felt so bad for you— someone who almost killed him.

You couldn’t help but stay tense, feeling like a cornered animal— waiting for your predator to attack. But as before, the man made no indication that he was going to hurt you. Instead, he squatted down in front of you— not missing the way you flinched back at his sudden closeness.

“You’re hurt.” He stated, as if it wasn’t obvious.

You couldn’t find it in yourself for a snarky comeback, not when you felt this defeated.

“W-why? What are yo- I—”

“You’re hurt, allow me to help you.” He interrupted your babbling.

Your eyes were painted in confusion, your features twisting into uncertainty. Everything about this didn’t feel right, you should’ve pushed him away and allow yourself to die instead. But you couldn’t control the way your body relaxed, your head bowing in submission.

“My name is Choso. What’s yours?” He asked, his hands ripping a part of your jacket off, creating a long bandage like strand.

You swallowed, taking a deep breath in before responding.

“I-It’s (Y/n).” You rasped out, the taste of iron coating your tongue suddenly.

Choso snuck a quick glance to you at the reveal of your name. (Y/n)… he quickly realized he liked it.

He gently snuck the jacket strand behind the dip of your lower back, tying it tightly around your wound. The sensation had you whining, teeth digging into your bottom lip as you tried to conceal your cries. The pain had washed over your body with such intensity, you felt like you were going to faint.

“Please, keep your eyes open.” He instructed, moving his attention from your side to the cut on your face.

Without realizing it, he was letting his fingers caress around the wound. You gasped at the feeling, the pads of his fingers rough in texture— but he brushed over your skin with such delicacy.

“Why are you helping m-me?” You rasped out, coughing from the tightness of your lungs.

Choso let his eyes drop from your cut to your eyes, gazing into yours with confusion. Mainly because he wasn’t quite sure why he was helping you— he just knew he had to.

“I don’t know.” He answered truthfully.

You furrowed your brows, but couldn’t dwell on his words too long— not when your body seized and twitched for a moment. This particular wave of pain hitting you harder than the rest.

Choso watched you with an intensity in his eyes, and he almost grew distracted by another unfamiliar sensation in his chest. Concern? For this sorcerer?

“I don’t deserve your help… but thank you.” You whispered, body slowly relaxing after the pain subsided for now.

“You spared me. Call this me, returning the favor.” He stated.

Although, he wasn’t sure if that was the main reason why he was saving you.

You attempted to shoot him a weak smile, but when he noticed a drop of blood escaping from the corner of your lips— he couldn’t find it in himself to return the gesture.

“Well… I appreciate it.” You mumbled out.

Choso could sense you losing consciousness, and he knew he had to get you more medical attention. He wasn’t going to let you die here— not today.

As your eyes finally dropped, your body slumping with fatigue— Choso didn’t waste another second. He scooped up your fragile form, carrying you bridal style to find some help.

His steps were quick and rushed, the sight of you laying in his arms causing another sensation to bloom in his chest. You looked so peaceful. So… pretty— like an angel. He found it odd for him to think such things.

All he knew was that the next thought he had, was leaving him the most confused he’d ever been.

He never wanted to let you out of his sight again.

— ending notes. this was in my drafts for awhile, and it’s just something random i wrote. had a dream similar to this 😇☁️ also apologies for any spelling mistakes!

[jazeswhbhaven]

The Encounter of Two Flames | React | Spoilers

HOW WE DOIN' LOVELIES? We've got ourselves a Gehenna eventtttt<3 Why not have one during the anniversary of WHB launching? Satan was our first and he's here to tell us his story.

I for one feel like it's nice getting know "young" Satan and seeing this new sprite of his.

I waited for compile the first four days together because making a post for each damn day was becoming tedious lol. Sure it's good for spreading out screenshots but my adhd is k i l l i n g me.

Let's get started tho yeah?

"As they always do"....

Like good fucking lord Gehenna is always being attacked. I've said this once and I'll say it again like the angels really have fucking beef with Satan it seems. They barely touch the other parts of Hell.

Cameo from the bae, thank you for letting us know your thoughts boo. ʃƪ˘ﻬ˘) ♡´

So anyways Gehenna is under fire for a different reason today, it is none other than Sitri that's burning up the entire place and even his sprite is just nothing but blue fire.

In science class ya'll, we remember that blue flames are actually hotter than the orange ones. So I can imagine it's a good thing that Solomon or MC weren't here cause yeah they would of been instantly vaporized.

But all the devils are trying to put the fire out, can't cause water ofc won't help here.

I imagine Sitri's fire is more of a energy/essence sourced fire though so ofc it can't be extinguished by "normal" methods.

AND THEN HERE COMES THE BOO BEAR.

Young Satan is peak I swear. He's spunky, full of life, catty, I feel he's easily annoyed more, and just got that "it" factor. Not to say the older him is drained and used up, but definitely more mature.

So he goes to his demonic monster form, which as far as we've seen he's the only one that has a form like that. I'd like to assume the others do too but don't have to use it as often or at all.

cough we should have a h-scene with monster demon satan cough

So....why did Sitri burn up Gehenna??

Well it turns out that Sitri wasn't necessarily doing this on purpose.

Normally, our blue haired mr perfect shoes has everything together. Here he doesn't. Phew....Sitri I know something ain't right when your room is as messy as Paimon's (canon stuff that Paimon doesn't keep his room clean lmao)

Like? even Sitri's appearance is all kinds of fucked. Dry cracked lips, fucked up hair, like our baby is not doing well ya'll.

Andddd Belialllllll the bae <3 comes to visit. Jjyu and his loud mouthed self..

What kills me is that Sitri literally was like "I didn't hear you."

WHAT?

And then we find out through Belial writing it down because he didn't want Jjyu making shit worse (good call) that it wasn't Sitri's fault that the recent battle went all wrong and a lot of devils were killed in the process.

Sitri feels responsible for their deaths and is spiraling right now overthinking the past and thinking how it could have been better.

I feel sorry for him, because there was a time in my life where I would do the same and basically be so deep in my regret and guilt I neglected my health, my surroundings, my friendships...pretty much everything. It wasn't a good time so I know what Sitri is going through.

We even hear him mention that Zagan was badly injured (Astaroth too)

Jjyu shut the hell up omg lmaooooo

(him in response to Sitri explaining that Zagan could barely speak he was hurt so badly) Belial glares at him for that btw lmao

Satan also got injured it seems so it sounds like this battle went really bad.

Sitri even asks to be alone, and well Belial gets it and leaves promptly. I really like seeing Belial be more interactive this go around because we barely get that from the Gehenna devils in the main story and the last event in Gehenna was mostly just Minhyeok and Ppyong.

This gives me an insight as to how Belial is in personality, and really aside from Jjyu, he's really just chill and seems very pleasant to be around in general. I wish we could see what his eyes look like. It would change me forever.

So we're at the meeting that happens a few days later and well Sitri is still in a sullen mood. Since Zagan and Astaroth are out of commission, Amy was invited to come.

Oh so it seems Amy is going to be popping up since we got introduced. That's pretty nifty.

And Leraye is definitely worried about Sitri, wondering if he's sleeping, eating, and his condition has gotten worse. I imagine Sitri hasn't sleep in days since the event.

Paimon tries to lighten the mood but bless his heart it doesn't work when...

Amy starts going off about Sitri ordering him and his men to go east, and well that was the wrong call this time. I see it as a simple miscalculation but in the heat of war...perhaps things like this can't just be mistakes. lives are at stake, and devils aren't being re-produced anymore. Their extinction is literally inevitable during these battles.

Even if it weren't, lives were still lost and Amy takes this personally because it was HIS men who were affected the most.

I guess this seemed like the "best" time to bring up why Amy hates Sitri so much but it's like???? "because he looks like a girl?"

I'm just going to take this as Amy just not liking how elegant Sitri is with everything and how it compares to his rough and rash behavior. I don't think he truly would care if anyone looks more feminine.

And well because Amy started some shit, Sitri took a piece of paper, spat in it and threw it at Amy. So naturally...here we are.

Now a couple things about this scene...Zagan is present...and then there's a random devil there which this a private meeting for the nobles so why????

idk....let's just keep going lol

So Amy goes on to further berate Sitri and saying that he's aware that him and his subordinates have to follow orders once they get them from the center, so if the orders were better thought out his men wouldn't of died.

Sitri tells him why doesn't he kill him then since it was as if he did it himself and Amy is all like ????

And here we see more of their banter dynamic and it's almost as if Amy literally just holds back and only fights with words. Sitri physically maims and does things to him just as we saw in the previous event.

He even broke his wrist here like damn. And came in like-

Like good lord Sitri chill

And then Sitri starts to smack the shit out of him and cuss him out some more and Paimon stops the fight because Amy is literally about to give him a concussion at this point. Paimon invited Amy because he felt it would be good to go over the battle with him there but he realizes all it did was make things worse.

Leraye goes to even try and talk with Sitri to see if he's taking care of himself and well, obviously he's not. He's still focused on the battle and his mistakes.

A few days later happens and Sitri is front and center because Amy pretty much said he isn't listening to him anymore and doing what he thinks is best.

And Sitri isn't doing so hot in battle either. He's shooting without a plan or strategy, other devils are just standing around. Yes angel's are dying but he's just...doing whatever and hasn't had proper sleep or anything.

He's such a mess Satan had to come in and kick his ass in the middle of battle and set him straight.

So it's safe to say that Satan doesn't like tasteless and useless anger. There has to be a purpose for your anger and for him to thrive on it and he just ain't diggin' it from Sitri at the moment.

Oh boy...I don't have a good feeling about that.

So we go back to the time when Gehenna was up in flames. We have Leraye snippin' and doin' his thing and Ppyong helping with bringing over bullets. They then notice Sitri on the battlefield and he seems to be killing every single angel accurately but....our boy Leraye knows best.

He tells Ppyong to STOP Sitri because this isn't a planned attack, he is literally killing everyone that gets in his range. Doesn't matter if it's angel or devil.

Sitri is literally so damn tired he can't even notice or care anymore and is just going at it.

And that's when everyone notices the flames at the same time. They are erupting from Sitri's body.

Belial even uses his hoarse voice to call out to Sitri and we know that's serious.

And sorry like I know that Sitri is in a bad place and bad spot rn but he looks so pretty here. The blue and pink contrasts are definitely a Sitri signature look.

But yeah that fire is way too hot for anyone to do anything. Even Leraye is told that he can't help. So Ppyong runs off to find Amy to help.

Leraye does attempt though, but it's no use, and Paimon had to come and save him. (they're so cute I love them)

And ya'll it was THREE damn days that fires were going and THREE days that Sitri was like that just in the middle of the square. Also...damn why did it take three days for Ppyong to go find Amy? (he explains later that the teleportation talisman just couldn't keep up with Amy)

But the Gehenna bois are all going over how they don't blame Sitri, they blame themselves for letting him hold that weight of being responsible for everything that happens. It's that weight that led to his current state and now things were worse off for everyone but they feared most for Sitri's life and well-being.

But Amy finally shows up and well his attempts to help the situation were hopeful at first...but sadly...

Amy gets stabbed in the stomach with one of the iron maiden spikes...which at this point are surrounding Sitri like vines to protect him. This raw power is actually quite impressive if it weren't ya know killing everyone around him in a blind haze.

I wonder if he was able to tap into that while training in Hades?

But...yeah I was rooting for Amy to bring him back here because you know frenemies and stuff like that (or for those who ship them only Amy can bring him back)

BUT Satan comes to the rescue!

Poor Amy, I swear he's always gettin' tossed around and shit lol

Also as many times Amy has been slashed and punctured in the stomach you would assume he'd never recover from that.

But we have something important here that I'd like to talk about for a minute that Satan reveals...

He mentions that Sitri is dealing with depression and that he must have gotten it from him. If we remember from his info card he is the embodiment of depression in Hell. He is depression. So his right hand devil that's always around him? Yeah eventually he's gonna get bit by the bug.

And I like that Satan isn't the typical representation of depression either. He always seems upbeat, active, and doing everything and anything. But as we have seen in the main story he has emotional wounds that haven't healed and he wonders if they will. He was speaking of the loss of Solomon, but I'm sure there's more to it than that which existed way before he even met him.

Now we see that Sitri is literally not taking care of himself, wallowing, self destructing, that's what most folks usually see and demonize when folks are going through IRL depression. They never seem to pay attention to the person who has it all together because why would they have depression? they're doing fine right?

n o p e.

So here we are...knowing the source. And why Satan has decided to be the one to save Sitri. And well since he can't do that as himself he has to transform to his monster form to do it.

I'd just like to bring up that he's so damn cute here. The jokester.

But it seems that Satan doesn't take his monster form often. We've seen it first when he met Solomon to test him, we see it when he fights Mammon that one time in one of the comics iirc, and we see it now.

I wonder when was the first time he ever had to use his monster form?

But either way, he carries Sitri out of the flames, and even though Sitri is still on fucking fire burning on his back Satan can handle it. Even Astaroth is concerned and comes to see if Satan is okay.

Satan starts traveling somewhere..."where memories flicker" to go put out the fire though, and everyone is following him.

Satan keeps mentioning that Sitri kept a promise to him that he wouldn't die. And I think we will get to the root of that soon.

And that's when we go to a F L A S H B A C K

ALRIGHT TIMELINE SHIT TAHNK

So...with this bit of info this is what I've gathered-

-Satan, Belphie, Mammon, and Leviathan all were already here before Lucifer was

-Gehenna was not in existence yet, but Tartaros and Hades were

-This possibly happened around the same time that Mammon was trapped (or after)

S T O P fueling my damn SHIP (and by stop I mean keep doing it.)

So apparently in a land assuming early Gehenna there were rumors of a beautiful beast, and Satan was like "oh levi??? :D" but clearly not him lol

I just think it's funny that his first thought was Leviathan. (he'd be like yeah think of me first you idiot)

AND WE SEE EARLY RED LUMPLINGSSSSSSSSSSS

the babiessssssssssss

They must have been before Ppyong because I don't see him here. So hopefully we get to see when Ppyong arrived!!

So what Satan is doing right now is traveling with these three going to find what this beast is and if he can find his right hand devil in order to help him build his kingdom.

Coming of age story it seems...lol

Now this background made me be like oh....it's a pond literally full of rank ass blood.

Now i'm gonna gross ya'll out, but every time I see things like this I think of how period blood smells when it's been sitting on a pad for too long or in the trashcan with other bloody pads and it just smells really bad like tissue and blood because that's what it is....

But yeah I scrunched my nose because I'm like Hell is not the place for me and my nose I'd literally wish for sense of smell to vanish.

one of the red lumps throws up and well I don't blame him...lol

nice to know that he says that to basically everyone and everything even in his past lol

BUT it seems tomorrow we're going to see who it is he's calling out to, my guess is it's probably Sitri because well...the story IS about them meeting after all.

There we have it ya'll, day one through four! I think for the rest of the days I'm just going to do two days at a time for each post I make instead of waiting four days because phew this was lot of catching up and writing lol

I'm realllyyyy feelin' Satan's look here btw. I've mentioned that already but Imma do it again lol

But overall so far I think I'm learning a lot about Sitri in a way I'd like to know more about Bael or Foras tbh since they are the right hand devils. I know we had a Niflheim event that showed Beleth, but I want to know what it is he did to fall to Hell and what that scar around his neck is about. And for those who didn't get Beel's bathcard we do get some of Bael's lore in there but only a crumb.

But alas...possibly may or may not get this but we'll see...

ANYWAYS thanks for reading and see ya'll on the next react ^^

[aliciaasky]

In the back of my mind

Paring: Anakin Skywalker x f!reader (she/her pronouns!) / Anakin Skywalker x Padmé Amidala

Feat: wildflower from Billie Eilish.

Summary: before Padmé and Anakin there was someone else. But best friends don’t betray each other, do they? (Mostly Padmé‘s POV.)

A/n: this might be a little more complicated, so pay close attention to who‘s meant with 'her‘ and it really shouldn’t be a problem! Just a short little angsty Drabble I wanted to share, enjoy!

Padmé and her had been best friends ever since she got into politics, she was the only one who understood her. They would sit and talk about all the world matters until they had to go home.

When they both were in desperate need of a bodyguard due to life threatening conditions, they were both so giddy knowing that the two best Jedi‘s were coming to protect them.

Anakin and her got along quick, quicker than Padmé had ever seen her best friend get along with anyone.

His ponytail and his hypnotizing eyes really did the trick.

Anakin only remembered being in love with Padmé all his life, counting the days until he saw her again. But she didn’t want him, and he was sick of coming across as pushy.

Padmé was so happy for her best friend when she and Anakin became official. She listened to all the stories with excitement, giving her advice on how to kiss, or which positions men liked best.

For two whole years she watched her best friend shine with the boy who used to be in love with her.

But she didn’t reciprocate those feelings, so she really didn’t have any right to be upset. Her best friend had deserved this. A great guy such like Ani.

When they broke up due to him cheating on her drunkenly, Padmé held her tight.

“He‘s not worth it.“ “he‘s such an idiot for losing you!“

The little twinge of hope in her chest didn’t show.

She was crying on my shoulder, all I could do was hold her,

“You’re the Best friend I could ever have.“ She hugs Padmé tightly, and she put on a fake smile.

Padmé watched her get ready for her date later, pretending to be so proud of her for finally getting over Anakin.

She didn’t mention her own date that she had later that day.

Only made us closer

Anakin was desperate. He wouldn’t leave her alone.

It was not her fault.

Until July,

She didn’t want this, she didn’t want to fall for her best friend’s ex boyfriend.

But she did anyway, doesn’t matter how much she tried to deny and fight it.

“Anakin you know we can’t!“ she cried “what about-“ but he cut her off,

“What about us, Padmé? Don’t we deserve happiness? I love you.“ he begged.

And I know that you love me, you don’t need to remind me.

The talk was what Padmé dreaded the most.

So she didn’t talk.

She avoided her as best as possible, only talked when necessary.

Soon they grew apart, Padmé made sure she would think it only happened because of time,

Because sometimes friends just grow apart, it’s the circle of life, isn’t it?

But when she and Anakin walked by her, hand in hand, and their eyes met briefly,

Padmé knew that she knows now.

That she knows why Padmé has been avoiding her.

That she knows why they grew apart, why their friendship had to end.

Because Padmé took something that was once hers.

And they never spoke again.

I should put it all behind me.. shouldn’t I?

“We‘re here!“ Anakin announced proudly, "do you like it?“

Padmé looked at the lake in front of her.

“And then he took me to the lake and told me he loved me! How sweet is that? It was-“ both girls squealed together.

“Perfect,“ Padmé finished the sentence she had once heard in a different scenario,

“It’s perfect.“ she looked at the lake.

But I see her,

In the back of my mind.

All the time.

[blasphemousclaw]

Idk if you plan on doing the "questions-about-character-x" list yet, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on Marika (maybe with a side of Radagon but mostly the golden strumpet).

• favorite thing about them

nothing hits me harder than characters who lash out because of the injustice or suffering they’ve endured… there’s something so cathartic about characters who make their pain and anger felt in the world in a tangible and consequential way. Marika is this character to me!! I think it’s so powerful to introduce her as an all-powerful goddess, keeping her at a distance as this enigmatic figure who shaped the world as it is today and then shattered it, and then to humanize her by showing us where she comes from and what she went through… she was never just a cold, distant, uncaring deity, but a person, with very human motivations and flaws. learning her backstory gives us so much context for why she did the things that she did and gives us the opportunity to feel close to her and empathize with her… I think she was always sympathetic in the base game, but she still felt so distant, so I really love how the dlc fleshed her out and made her character so accessible

• least favorite thing about them

this isn’t even about her, but about how the fanbase has responded to her writing in the dlc because like dear god

it almost makes me want to avoid content of her which sucks because I really like her LOL

• favorite line

“Hear me, Demigods. My children beloved. Make of thyselves that which ye desire. Be it a Lord. Be it a God. But should ye fail to become aught at all, ye will be forsaken. Amounting only to sacrifices...”

absolutely fascinating quote… we don’t really know the context, so there’s many different ways to interpret it… Marika urging her children to become a lord or a god is interesting, because when she deposed the Gloam-Eyed Queen and removed Destined Death from the Elden Ring, it seemed like she was fighting hard to stay in power and to become “Eternal,” but her children succeeding her would necessarily end her reign? This also almost seems like she’s encouraging conflict between her children… there can only be one god and one lord, after all. we don’t know when the quote was spoken, but it almost seems to reference Ranni’s sacrifice of Godwyn on her path to godhood on her own terms? is this a warning? is it a challenge? is it just the words of an extremely jaded and cynical goddess?

• brOTP, ОТР

ok I’m gonna do away with this format here because I just want to list some of her relationships that I really like without having to categorize them:

Marika and Messmer: the dynamic of Marika being a god-queen whose grace is blinding, and her son being born cursed with a serpent of the lightless abyss is so good… him taking up the crusade on her behalf, of his own volition, because he hates how he was born so deeply and will do anything to try to atone for something that isn’t even his fault, committing horrors in her name, is SOOOO

Marika and Radagon: I love pondering where one of them starts and the other begins, how they have opposite goals and worldviews but exist in the same being. really good

Marika and Rennala: I wouldn’t call it an otp but I like it as a ship. Marika being the one to steal away Rennala’s husband, but she actually IS her husband. unparalleled dynamic

• nОТР

there arent any Marika ships I’ve seen that I dislike

• random headcanon

I think she was horrified and disgusted by Morgott and Mohg AND she loved them still. omen babies would have their horns cut off, usually causing them to die, but omen babies born of royalty did not have their horns cut off, so they were allowed to live… I love the idea that Marika couldn’t bear to sentence her children to death, but she also couldn’t bear to look at them because of her past, so they were confined to the Shunning Grounds

• unpopular opinion

*cracks knuckles*

SO MANY people have the wrong idea about her. you’ve got people saying everything she did was justified, she didn’t go far enough, “total hornsent death” etc etc. and on the other hand you’ve got people saying the dlc writing is terrible because it’s excusing Marika for her crimes, it’s baiting you to feel bad for the hornsent and then pulling a plot twist that actually, they were evil and Marika was good the whole time!

both of these interpretations are flawed because the story is not arguing that the hornsent are fundamentally evil people, and it is not arguing that Marika is now blameless because of what she suffered. the story is rife with moments of sympathy for the hornsent’s suffering and examples of the crusade’s inexcusable cruelty, and so much of what’s in the base game showcases the cruelty that Marika’s Order has inflicted. just because the story is giving Marika a sympathetic reason for why she is the way she is does not mean that these facts cease to exist! sympathy for Marika, sympathy for the hornsent, and condemnation for the Golden Order’s and the crusade’s crimes can all exist in the story at the same time!!!!!

• song i associate with them

…how about this: if anyone has a song in mind, leave it in the replies or tags!

• favorite picture of them

Ranni holding her head u_u

[hyuuukais]

-`♡´ - APARTMENT 143

pairing -> lee minho x fem reader

synopsis -> after a bad breakup, y/n needs to find a new place to live. although she's grateful for her best friend, up-and-coming model hwang hyunjin, for letting her stay at his, she can't keep living with him and his model roommates. so when an opening for somewhere nearby with cheap rent opens up, she jumps on it, despite knowing next to nothing about the 3 other tenants, only that one owns 3 cats. the three quickly learn of her breakup, determined to help get her back on her feet. but what happens when one of them begins to develop feelings?

warnings -> gen, mention of cheating, yn lowkey overthinking

MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT

CHAPTER NINE -> IS THIS A DATE? (partially written! wc:1.2k)

There's a knock at your door followed by silence while you internally debate whether or not you should open it, or if you should pretend you aren't home. As far as you know, no one saw you come in, just heard you. The atmosphere was suffocating, heavy. This had to be your fault. You shouldn't have pressed, you shouldn't have-

"Y/n?" Minho's voice comes from behind the wooden barrier. "I know you're in there."

"Sorry, Y/n isn't available! Only her twin sister who did nothing wrong and totally isn't stressing!"

No response.

With a sigh, you get up to open your door, Doongie running off your bed and back into your closet. You open the door, but your eyes are glued to the floor, unable to face the man in front of you. The door is only open a crack, just enough for him to see your face, and you, his. His arms are crossed, body tense.

"Have you seen Soonie, Doongie, or Dori?" Minho asks curtly.

"Um, yeah, Doongie is in my closet-"

"What?" Minho tries to push past your door, but you're able to keep it mostly closed. Your room was currently a mess, no doubt a reflection of your mind the past few weeks. "Why is he in your closet?"

With a light shove, he makes his way in and moves quickly toward your closet opposite your bed. You watch as he slides the curtain away, your lack of a closet door making you shrink a bit into yourself. To be fair, it was like that when you moved in, so obviously the boys knew about it already. Still, you couldn't help feeling a tinge of embarrassment, not to mention the fact most of the content in there is strewn across your floor.

A small meow is heard from behind the curtain, Minho's arm outstretched. His shoulders seem to be a little more relaxed as he stands back to his full height, finally taking in your room with a low whistle. Now you cross your arms.

"If you're going to judge, you can leave," you huff, but then remember the reason he's probably upset in the first place. Your face flushes. "Oh, and I wanted to say I'm really, really sorry."

"For...?"

"You know what for!" You move to the edge of your bed, playing with the corner of a blanket on the verge of falling off. "In the group chat, I shouldn't have pried. Obviously you don't owe telling me anything, which I know you know, but still. I guess I was just shocked? Surprised? Whatever? That's totally messed up by the way, having a secret husband. I mean, who does that? Seriously, who does that?"

"My ex, apparently." Minho sits at the end of your bed, grabbing the blanket as it falls to the ground.

Gently, he folds it up and replaces it at the end he's sitting on, getting up and doing the same to another half under your bedframe.

"Well, your ex needs to learn what commitment is then." He grabs the half empty laundry basket from under you windowsill. "Mine too."

"Do you know if he cheated on you before?" Minho asks, picking up a few shirts abandoned next to the basket.

"I- he-" You stutter, bringing your knees up to your chin as you lean back against the headboard. "He loved me."

"That doesn't answer the question." He puts the basket down, grabbing a small pile of clothing from beside your bed on the opposite side you sit on.

"Don't tell anyone," you whisper, ashamed. "Once, but it was right at the beginning of our relationship and I don't think we were even technically official yet since he seemed so unbothered when I walked in on them together. After that I had a conversation with him about what we were to each other, and he hasn't cheated since. I mean, he has now, but not counting that."

The laundry basket is full, Minho placing it outside of your door. Next on his list are dishes, beginning to make a stack of plates and mugs on the dresser by your door. There aren't many, but enough to be a problem. Enough to be overwhelming.

"Back to the point, I never should have asked about anything." You rub a hand down your face. "I was being stupid."

"No, you were curious," Minho says. "But you're right in thinking you shouldn't have asked."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you going to apologize as much as you thanked me?" He tosses a missed sock at you, hitting you in the knee.

"S-" You freeze, making eye contact with him as he places the last mug aside. "Forget what I was about to say."

A small smile tugs on his mouth as he leaves your room. He's back in record time with a broom and dustpan in his hands. It's only now that you realize what he's been doing for you and you jump up, grabbing his wrist to halt his sweeping.

"Stop! You don't need to clean for me, I can do it myself." You attempt to take the broom, but he switches it to the other hand. "Please. Why are you doing this?"

"Because once this place is a little more cleaned up, you are going to help me find my cats." Minho finishes sweeping the little pile of dirt and dust.

"So this was for a favour?" You ask. "I would have helped you anyway. But what do you mean by 'find my cats'? Are they missing? What happened? How would they get out?"

"You tell me," he says, placing the broom against the wall by your door and heading out. You follow him to the back door, slipping on some sandals before walking out to the balcony. "The door was left open, so I have to assume they went out this way. Ah, I'm going to kill Han."

"Han? Don't kill Han. Why would you kill Han?"

"He left the door open," Minho starts up the staircase leading up to the roof.

The way the roof access was connected to your balcony confused you, but you assumed it came with the apartment. You'd only been up there once since moving in to water some plants at Han's request since he'd been gone all day and hadn't gotten the chance. A light breeze hit your face as you stepped onto the roof, scanning for any sign of cats.

"There!" You jog across the roof to the small garden where Dori sits amongst tomatoes. "Come here you."

Dori stretches out, emerging from the plants to headbutt the hand you stick out. He rubs against your crouched knees purring up a storm, stepping up half onto your leg to ask for pats. You giggle, rubbing his soft cheeks and watching as he lifts his head up, giving him some chin rubs before picking him up.

When you turn, you see Minho with Soonie cradled in his arms like a baby. He's not facing you completely, but you can see him pointing a finger at Soonie and scolding the cat for scaring him like that. Soonie nudges his finger, giving a small lick. Minho shakes his head smiling, taking a small treat from his back pocket. Your heart stutters, a warm feeling blossoming in your chest as you watch.

notes -> so soobin, huh?

taglist -> @chaeryred @toplinelix @channie-143 @puppyminnnie @tfshouldidohere @kangaracha @chlodavids @whitney190 @thisisnotjacinta @borahae-reads @brooklynie @gini143 @kayleigh-28 @skz-streamer @babyphotos0325 @scallywag1299 @venusmoonxnight @naomisosoup @fertiliezedtoesw @s00buwu @realrintaro @anothershorthuman @skzstaykatsy @ilovejeongin007 @btswestan @taeriffic @ihrtlix @raehawthorne @euphoric-univers @hyperpixie @evermourning @satsuri3su @jazziwritesthings @minhwa @wyzminho @fic-for-readers @dreamerwasfound @imsiriuslyreal @lailac13 @palindrome969 @lixie-phoria @aalexyuuuhm @sunflowerbebe07 @st4rhwa @lukeys-giggle @jabmastersupriseee

^^^ orange means i can't tag you

[emp-t-man]

eiffel and minkowski are often perceived (either by the other characters of the podcast or its audience, but mostly by each other) as the lazy slacker who sucks at his job and the competent go-getter who’s the best at what she does, and yet neither of these things are true. i think one of my favorites of their parallels is they are both exceptionally good at what they do, and yet they both constantly suffer from doubts about their own abilities. they just have completely different ways of going about this insecurity, and that’s what creates this stigma about them.

eiffel has proven time and time again that he absolutely knows what he’s doing in his field. He’s extremely protective over his equipment, he knows exactly what to do when it doesn’t work ninety nine percent of the time, the man made two way radios from old audio recorders, for christ’s sake, not to mention the way he was able to figure out how to survive for months in the middle of deep space completely by himself. but one of his most fatal flaws is that he doesn’t believe he knows what he’s doing. his self hatred and insecurity run so deep that the moment he believes he’s not cut out for something, he stops trying entirely. he sees people like minkowski doing such a good job in their position, that when people like that tell him he’s incapable of doing the same, he believes it, because he never believed in himself, anyway. i think the most obvious example of this is after the season one finale, when he learns about the decima project. the minute he learns that being an officer of communications wasn’t his only purpose on that mission, he comes to the conclusion that he doesn’t serve that purpose at all. he resolves that he was simply an “experimental meatbag”, chosen for the mission because he had absolutely nothing else going for him. he’s so quick to dismiss his worth and his capabilities, and so he leans into this persona of a good for nothing procrastinator to avoid letting his peers down by never letting them form expectations of him in the first place. of course, he isn’t perfect, he is a bit of a procrastinator and a scatterbrain, but that’s far from all he is.

minkowski on the other hand, she’s constantly praised for all of her achievements and hard work, be it by goddard, by her students, her superiors, lovelace, and especially eiffel in the later seasons. she’s seen as strong, and resilient, and an excellent leader. but the thing is, she also constantly doubts her own ability. this can also be seen during the season one finale, where she apologizes to eiffel because she describes hera’s deactivation and hilbert’s mutiny as her own fault, because she wasn’t a good enough commander to prevent it. but the thing about her is when she starts to doubt her capability, she works overtime to try and prove herself and anyone else who may doubt her wrong, which is also unhealthy! it happens with the plant monster, when she continuously risks her own life just to prove to herself that she can have the slightest bit of control over a situation. it happens during pan-pan, where she attempts to keep the stress fractures in the station a secret and handle them on her own because she wants to be able to protect the lives and morale of her crew the way a “good commander” should! instead of giving up and saving herself the disappointment if ever she should fail, she does the complete opposite, working herself to the bone and obsessing over every detail to make sure she doesn’t fail, no matter what it takes.

now here’s the kicker— after the events of desperate times / desperate measures, eiffel and minkowski completely swap coping mechanisms. when lovelace comes to, minkowski almost immediately asks her to assume the position of commander in her place, because she thinks that the loss of lives means that she completely failed her objective and isn’t fit for the role. her stepping down is essentially giving up in her eyes, because why hold such an important position if you’re no good at it? meanwhile, in episode fifty two, after eiffel gets called out on his, while without malicious intent, inconsiderate and distasteful behavior, he completely withdraws from the rest of the crew in order to work extremely hard on his own tasks, ultimately risking his and the rest of the crew’s life in order to prove he can be useful. sounds familiar, right?

but the thing is, they’ve each already spent so much time reverting to their original way of coping, that attempting the other’s method is immediately clocked as simply being concerning and out of character, rather than establishing them as the opposite archetype of being capable or not. lovelace expects minkowski to always resort to overachieving, but not because its a way to disprove her insecurity, but because it’s just “who she is”. so when she does the opposite, that’s when she realizes something is wrong, and resorts to comforting minkowski instead of simply letting her do what she’s elected to do. hera expects eiffel to laugh off any mistake he makes and go back to goofing off— not because it’s his way of avoiding disappointment from those he cares about, but because it’s just “who he is”. so when he does the opposite, focusing solely and intently on his duties where he was so comfortable neglecting them before, she realizes something is wrong. and when he explains to the rest of the crew that his actions are only to “help the only way he still can”, they realize something is wrong, and choose to comfort him rather than simply rolling their eyes and letting eiffel be eiffel.

it is. so incredibly late at night so i don’t know if this makes the sense i want it to make but i just. cannot get enough of how much they compliment and reflect each other. they seem to have nothing in common on the surface, but they fit together so well in terms of how they operate as people and i’m obsessed with it

[kaithonks]

So I’ve had some Thoughts about From the DC Vault: Death in the Family: Robin Lives!

Warning: Spoilers 

My mistake with From the DC Vault: Death in the Family: Robin Lives! was thinking that the story would actually be about Robin. That was on me. I should have known better, but I let my excitement of finally getting more Jason Todd, Robin content get away from me. I set up poor expectations, and it’s not the comic’s fault for not meeting those expectations. 

Everything else is, though. 

I know I’m biased, and I am probably writing this too soon after having finished Robin Lives to really give myself time to think critically about the story. But, I also feel rather offended by the end and feel the need to strike while the iron is hot. Recently, I talked about fans and writers needing to have respect for each other, as they can’t exist without each other. I also mentioned having a respect for the history of the comic. On that, I don’t get the feeling that J. M. DeMatteis has much respect for the history that was Jason’s Robin run. Granted, this isn’t mainline canon. It is more of a ‘What if?’ So DeMatteis wasn’t “entrusted” the same way but, there was still a line of basic respect that feels very lacking. Now, DeMatteis has been writing since the 80s and has written a lot for both DC and Marvel so he is a part of comic history, but this doesn’t really translate into respect for characters. Or for fans.

Both Jason and Dick’s character have a rough time in this 4 issue series. While the series called “Robin Lives” mostly focuses on Bruce and his regret, by doing that it makes Jason and Dick more like props for Bruce’s guilt than actually characters with their own agency. Bruce outright denies Dick’s choice in becoming a Robin and even later Nightwing. In this guilt, Bruce totally takes away the fact that even as a child, Dick did choose this, and he chose it again when he became Nightwing. So Bruce’s guilt serves no one here. And this problem gets worst with the Robin Lives ending. Dick becoming Batman, is an incredibly weak ending to start. Because most of Dick’s history is him growing out of Robin and then trying to break out of Bruce’s shadow. Yes, Battle for the Cowl happens, but it’s more complex than Dick just becoming Batman. And it’s easy to see how pointless all of Bruce’s guilt was when he decided to leave his role as Batman, only for Dick to take it up again. It really feels like Dick is only a prop for Bruce’s journey. Dick is here for Bruce to feel guilty about, but then to also relieve him of the duty that also makes him feel guilty. 

And it is so much worse with Jason. This does sort of come back to me setting up poor expectations and the fact I thought this would be about Jason’s recover, but it was glossed over. We simply jump to Jason now being okay, which is a choice, if on the unbelievable side. What is worse, though, is how Bruce and the comic, makes Jason’s trauma about Bruce. Because yes, to an extent Bruce holds fault for the events leading up to Death in the Family. But he mainly holds fault in the form of negligence. He didn’t properly check out Sheila Haywood's background before for deciding she was a safe person to leave his son with. I am boiling down the issue of character interaction between Bruce and Jason (and outside influence that puts Jason’s last issues into context), but my point still stands that Bruce and Jason still made choices. For Jason’s part, he chose to trust Shelia to try, and save her. And in reality, Joker and Shelia hold the blame for Jason’s trauma. The fact Shelia was only briefly seen in a hallucination and “saving” Jason, again feels like DeMatteis has a lacking appreciation for the history of Jason’s Robin, and it’s context. Yes, Shelia saving Jason would be something Jason would want, but the event after this takes away everything that would make Jason still want Shelia’s affection in some way. With the ending and Jason becoming the Joker to Dick’s Batman, shows this. It ultimately feels like both Dick and Jason were used as stage props to re-establish some kind of status quo for a series that was only planned for only four issue. The run very well could have ended with the Joker’s death and everyone going to live happy lives but for some reason no. 

Now, one could see that as DeMatteis having a respect for Batman’s history as a whole and a path for a continuation. I would argue, though, that it shouldn’t come at the cost of other character’s agency. The leap in Jason’s “madness” is awkward, and when I say leap I mean a massive leap. This goes back to my problem with the story not focusing on Jason. We spend so much time in Bruce’s grief that when it is about Jason, everything goes sideways and ends up with being a “What the hell did that happen?” Especially since in the context of the story, Jason should have gotten a lot more support from Bruce, now retired, from Dick, now living back in Gotham, and from Dr. Sarawarti Dev, a psychologist. Having Jason still become the Joker after all this, not only feels like all of those people continued to fail him (especially as Bruce and Dr. Sara get married, which was a strange addition), but that he never really had any choice.  The story didn’t take the time to show us this, to show us how or where Jason became the Joker. He even denied becoming like the Joke in early issue 4. A point might be made that killing the Joker made Jason the new Joker, but a counterpoint Why? Jason already had the choice and decided? Why did he go back on that? Jason was Robin, Robin has the role of bringing hope, and being more compassionate, countering the fear Batman brings. We see Jason’s compassion before he died (or was injured in this case), when he still tried to save Shelia after she betrayed him. We see it in this comic with him still wanting her affection in his hallucination. So where did that compassion and care go?  

The answer? It didn’t go anywhere.  It was forgotten for the sake of a convoluted twist to make a reader gasp. Robin Lives spends its whole four issue run taking away the choice and agency of Robin. Robin does not live here. He becomes a puppet of the plot not to move outside of its designated story, he only can become Batman or the Joker. But never his own being. For anyone who’s ever enjoyed Robin, be it Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown, Damian Wayne or any other Robin, past or future, Robin Lives is an insult.

[billdenbrough]

@naturecalls111 prompted me kevaaron + procrastination and was like ‘post grad’, meaning they’re not undergrads if it’s canonverse, & something abt the phrasing latched into my brain so we ended up with this vaguely professor au w/ the flimsiest excuse for a TA-adjacent situation ever instead. idk. as ever this was just for her texts & i’m coming off a 30hr migraine so pls forgive me LMAO <3

“I can see right through you,” Kevin murmurs.

“Oh, yeah?” Aaron challenges. God, he’s close.

“Mm,” Kevin says. “You just don’t want to mark the test.”

It's an accusation, but there’s no censure in his voice. He's amused, mostly; fond too, despite himself. It’s not exactly behaviour he should be encouraging, but—

Aaron huffs. “I never want to mark a test,” he points out. “Undergrads are fucking stupid. Or these ones are, anyway.”

“You were an undergrad once,” Kevin says. He very determinedly keeps his hands steady on the bench. Maybe he’s gripping the edge so he stays in place; so what? That's between him and whatever God Renee believes in enough for the both of them.

“These ones,” Aaron repeats, scoffing. “Anyway, I'd never have taken a history paper. Get real.”

Kevin can’t help the frown there. “History is fascinating,” he argues. Aaron scoffs at him again, but the way he watches Kevin runs counter to that. Like he’s listening to whatever Kevin says, regardless. “It is,” Kevin insists again, clearing his throat.

Aaron's gaze tracks the movement, eyes following the motion of his throat, and Kevin kind of wants to clench the counter edge hard enough to crack the formica. Jesus Christ.

“You like research,” Kevin says. He keeps his eyes on Aaron, watches as he steps in closer again. “History is an endless study of every mistake we’ve ever made—”

“—So we don’t repeat our forefathers’ mistakes?” Aaron asks wryly. “Hate to break it to you, but that’s a non-starter.”

“No,” Kevin says, shaking his head. “We’re bad at learning. Mostly, we don’t even see the patterns for decades, if not centuries.”

Aaron cocks his head. “Doesn’t that frustrate you?” he asks. “I've seen you watch sports. You get mad if people make the same fuck-up within, like, three minutes.”

An image floats in Kevin’s head, unbidden: the two of them at the sports bar, late one night after they finally convinced Jeremy to go the fuck home because the college wasn’t paying him enough to sleep at his desk to reply to nineteen year olds’ panicked emails at 11:17pm before a midnight deadline. Kevin had been unbelievably put-out by the Astros’ scoreline; Aaron hadn’t cared so much, but had seemed to find great entertainment in prodding at Kevin to express his opinion to a bar full of patrons who strongly disagreed with him.

Do you even care about baseball? Kevin had asked in the end, exasperated. He’d unknotted his tie and slipped off his jacket, heated by his opinions and the game and the alcohol and the way Aaron had sat there, head tilted, that clever mouth of his quirked up to the side like a smirk, like a secret.

Not really, Aaron had said, shrugging. He swished his beer a little. I played hockey at school myself. Before Kevin could get too excited about that—a sport! An actual goddamn sport! that wasn’t only worth watching European leagues for, cough cough Jeremy and Jean and fucking football—Aaron added, I like seeing how much you care about it, though, and knocked Kevin right on his ass, metaphorically-speaking.

That night had ended in a blur: Kevin’s flushed cheeks as he lectured the bar at large about heliocentrism after finishing his grumbling about the baseball, Aaron’s quiet snort and eyes that laughed more than his mouth did, alcohol-sticky wood beneath his feet as he made his way to the bathroom, the taste of Aaron’s beer on his lips, Aaron’s cool fingers a balm against his cheek, his mouth a searing heat burning all the way through Kevin.

Then when Kevin’s TA dropped out because of ‘unmanageable stress’ (which was not Kevin’s fault, no matter what Dan says, she and Matt can fuck off) and he had to scramble to figure out what to do, Abby had offered one of her tutors—but only for marking, Kevin, he has no base in history. He’s just smart enough to use a rubric and willing to help. Between this and Jean’s long-suffering offer to lead the tutorial that didn’t clash with his meetings with his advisor, and even Neil’s unlikely assistance in the form of helping restructure the syllabus, it all seemed pretty manageable. (The history department had quietly come to the conclusion that this was not, strictly speaking, acceptable by university standards, but elected to ignore this information until the conclusion of the semester. As far as Kevin’s been able to tell in his years in academia, this is how things tend to work.)

When Abby showed up at his office with Aaron, though, Kevin's cheeks had gone hot enough that she’d asked him if he was sure he wasn’t coming down with a stress fever. Aaron's face had stayed blank, but his eyes were – amused.

It was one thing when Aaron had been the regular third person in the staff room late at night alongside Jeremy and Kevin, rubbing his eyes as he scowled at whatever it was he was looking at. (Anatomy exams, Kevin found out later.) He’d been mostly quiet, but sharply funny when he’d ended up interacting with them, mostly starting with indelicate snorts at whatever madcap thing Jeremy was saying, then incredulous stares at Kevin’s rebuttal, and finally muttered jabs as he worked the coffee machine and Jeremy laughed delightedly and Kevin stared at him with disbelief and a slow-building warmth in the base of his stomach.

It was yet another thing when Aaron had been the guy he bundled up Jeremy with, the guy he got drunk with for hours in a sports bar, the guy who laughed at him and offered him buffalo wings so spicy that they made Aaron’s cheeks red and Kevin’s lips feel like they were on fire, until Aaron kissed him, tipsy outside the bar, the warmth spreading through Kevin overtaking both the chilly night air and the spice-stained echoes on Kevin’s mouth.

But it was another thing entirely for Aaron to be Aaron, meaning Abby's favourite postgrad and the guy who diligently read Kevin’s syllabus on top of his own work just to better understand the marking rubric and hater of psych majors everywhere. Aaron, with his tired eyes and quiet laugh and complete inability to answer a phone call from his brother in a normal way. (At one point, Kevin had been half-concerned he was ordering a hit—less about the morality or legality of the situation, more in a if you get arrested, I’m screwed again type way—until Neil had shown up half an hour later with lunch for Aaron and Aaron had gone, ugh and Neil had rolled his eyes, spotted Kevin, and turned to Aaron to say, you’re one to talk. Aaron had flushed a little, then scowled and flipped Neil off, and said fuck off, to which Neil said, gladly, then see you at dinner? And Aaron had waved his hand. If you eat your fucking vegetables, to which Neil had laughed, and flipped him off, and walked out. Kevin had stared at Aaron, nonplussed, but Aaron had ignored him, focusing instead on the test he was marking while he ate the sandwich Neil had brought.) Aaron, with his unbelievably rude opinions about Kevin’s lack of video game knowledge, and the genuinely unreasonable amount of sour gummies he can put away in an hour, and the unbearably soft look he gets on his face when he’s sleepy and huffy and Kevin has gently dragged away whichever test he’s marking or article he’s reading that’s made him so grumpy late at night.

Aaron, who Kevin actually knows now. And likes even more for it, which is inconvenient and inopportune and probably inevitable.

Kevin clears his throat. “People are meant to try and win in sports,” he says. “History is about things that have already happened. It’s a different ballpark.” There’s a moment, and then, “They’ve already lost the battle. I'm not rooting for anything else there.”

Something flares up in Aaron's eyes at that, and he snakes his hand forward, tugging on Kevin's tie. Kevin, hands still holding onto the bench, allows it.

“But sports are about victory?” Aaron asks. 

He’s not even subtle about procrastinating, Kevin thinks. He wants to laugh. He swallows a sigh instead, and says, a little warningly, “Aaron…”

But he doesn’t move. Doesn’t stop Aaron, doesn’t do anything to stop him. Maybe leans in a little, even.

“Yeah,” Kevin says after a long moment. “History, you live or you die. Sports, you’re the best or you’re not.”

“That's a reductive way of looking at the world,” Aaron says, but it’s that tone he gets sometimes, the one where Kevin doesn’t know if he believes it or if he just wants to poke at Kevin a little. Kevin hates that he likes it as much as he does; that he lets it stoke him up, bites at the bit every time.

“You are not subtle,” Kevin murmurs. The tests are sitting on the table behind Aaron, staring up at the ceiling. Aaron's coffee is abandoned, probably cold.

You are not subtle, Kevin says, and means it, but Aaron’s cocked his eyebrow at him, and there’s something a little taunting in his eyes, and he’s still holding onto Kevin’s tie, and something in Kevin loosens. He sighs, and lets go of the bench, tucking his fingers into Aaron's belt loops instead and pulling him forward.

“Is this a sport?” Aaron asks, because he’s a dick and facetious and he knows just how to make Kevin want to shut him up.

“You’re not as funny as you think you are,” Kevin scolds, and then leans forward to kiss the rebuttal out of Aaron's mouth.

[qqueenofhades]

Last anon here -- I'm sorry for sending that message through. I don't know what is and isn't true anymore.

I deleted what I presume was your first ask (the one accusing me of not condemning the Gaza genocide and calling me a "DNC shill and a liar") because it was rude, uncalled for, and I couldn't see any good to come of engaging with it. However, because you've returned and apologized and sent this followup, I am willing to answer it, because I am aware that we can all do stupid things (especially on the internet) that we regret. So there is that.

Once again: I have strictly limited my posts/reblogs on this topic because it is so inflammatory, there are reams of people willing to attack you on every side, and none of it is actually constructive (this is the blue hellsite where we have two whole jokes about Ea-Nasir and color theory in children's hospitals. We are not doing important social justice work here and expecting this to be the main/only forum in which we post the Correct Opinions is not going to work out for anyone). But I would like, for the record, to point out that I have condemned the situation in Gaza and explicitly called it a genocide and Netanyahu and co. war criminals. Often and repeatedly:

Ask from October 28, 2023:

What’s happening to the Gazans right now is no qualification or equivocation, a genocide. It should rightfully be opposed and called what it is. But unfortunately, I have spent too much time around Western Online Leftists to believe they actually care a whit about stopping genocide as a fundamental principle, and only want to be seen to loudly care about what their Ideology has told them to care about. [...] To put it bluntly, those genocides are being committed by nation-states that Online Leftists like for being “anti-Western,” and therefore their activities are actually fine and should even need to be defended.

Another post from December 2023 explicitly calling out Netanyahu and his cabinet, while also pointing out that Tumblr's response now mostly consisted of antisemitic dogwhistles and rampant political misinformation:

[...] the way Netanyahu is personally a genocidal maniac with a far-right cabinet of war criminals and is bent on continuing the war in order to escape his own criminal prosecutions (and yes, he is HIGHLY affiliated with Trump and Putin) but this somehow still does not remotely justify or excuse the rampant frothingly mindless and generalized anti-Semitism seen everywhere on leftist spaces these days [....]

An ask from January 10th, 2024 (worth probably reading in full) where I once more say that nobody wants this to be happening, but that once again, the criticism in Western leftist forums (particularly Tumblr/Twitter) is not made equally or in good faith :

Nobody of basic good sense and decency wants to see Gaza leveled while the Israeli state continues to apply a number of violently cruel collective punishments even outside the actual daily bombing of civilians. But for the love of god, let’s get rid of the idea that the continued mindless violence doesn’t benefit Hamas (because it does; unsurprisingly, sympathy for their cause has soared in Gaza) as much as it does Israel, or that Hamas is some kind of benevolent peacemaker that is being thwarted by the cruel imperialist US/West.

This post, also from January 2024, explains why the kind of stunt-trick "pro Palestinian" activism that just relies on publicly hassling Jews is a) antisemitic and b) actively harming the people of Gaza, while once again pointing out whose fault this whole mess actually is:

If these people actually wanted to advocate constructively for Palestine in a good-faith way and not just punish random Jews or people who might have once met a Jew (which they don’t), they would take a look at that, go “hmm, this isn’t really getting the right result” and listen to the people who are telling them that by generating this bad publicity, they are doing far more harm to the cause than good. They are going to make the cause look foolish, they will drive away anyone who isn’t already radicalized, they will shut down any possibility of discussion and dialogue, and their efforts will be picked up in the Israeli nationalist right-wing media/Netanyahu and his war criminal advisors to insist to left-wing or anti-zionist Jews that (one of the, you know, big fucking reasons Israel was founded in the first place) they aren’t safe in any other country in the world, and they need to support the Israeli government’s actions, no matter how heinous.

A follow-up from January 31, 2024, discussing (again) the problems with insisting that Biden personally/the American power apparatus is just giving Israel a blank check and therefore Biden Iz Bad And This is All His Fault:

Once again: I strongly disagree with the idea of just giving Israel/Netanyahu a blank check to keep committing atrocities, but I also need to repeatedly point out that Biden isn’t doing that. His initial unconditional support of Israel after October 7 (which at the time was the correct response) has shifted to a much more measured and conditional approach where he has muted the overtly pro-Israel statements and started talking about a two-state solution and the need to protect the lives of civilians and trying to keep a lid on what could become a REALLY bad situation with all kinds of war-hungry powers eager to jump into the Middle East and blow it completely to hell.

I am a historian. This does not mean that I always know The Greatest Things Ever, but it does mean that I default toward long, cautious, and qualified responses where I try to consider multiple perspectives and nuances, rather than just posting pithy soundbites or black-and-white statements. (Yes, I know; I am doomed on social media.) Thus when I do discuss the situation, I tend toward trying to put it in broader context, to push back sharply against the idea that being "pro Palestine" is just being wildly antisemitic on social media and nothing else, and to call out those bad actors who are using this situation to continue to imperil American democracy and deliberately try to get Trump (who openly hankers to be a genocidal fascist dictator for everyone, not just Israel/Palestine) back into office.

I know that this is a situation which provokes (to say the least) strong emotions from everyone. I know that it's infuriating to feel totally helpless and just to have to watch it from afar. I know that we all wish we could stop it and that leads us to create meaning or assign importance to our own actions where there actually is none. But that does not mean that people have total liberty to spread antisemitic conspiracy theories, wild political misinformation, narratives designed whether unwittingly or deliberately to help Trump and other far-right fascists, and otherwise anonymously dogpile on people who haven't Posted The Correct Opinion on Tumblr (once again, Tumblr, where we get our news via Destiel meme). So I hope this has helped you, if this is what you wanted to get out of contacting me today, and hope also that you'll continue to think about what to do and how to act. It's hard, I know, and you have my sympathy. But so it is for us all.

[madi-writes-things]

Nobody Pt. 3

(C.Sturniolo X Reader)

Summary:

Chris and Y/N never seemed to get along, but sometimes help comes from the most unexpected places

Word Count: 547

TW: Cursing, SH (not in detail, but it is talked about), Hurt Comfort, Crying, Death (sibling), Grippy Sock Mention, Not Edited

A/N: mostly a filler chapter, but it’s important backstory stuff. I also forgot to add the pictures to chapter two 🫣

-Madi <3

“”“”“”“”“”

as I started to wake up, I noticed a newly familiar presence on top of me. I open my eyes to see Chris, eyes closed and hair messy, lying with his head just below my sternum. In a moment of weakness I start playing with his hair. He stirs for a moment, before opening his blue eyes to look up at me.

“Good morning” his voice was scratchy with sleep. My heart fluttered and my face flushed. I tried to play it off by distracting myself with his hair. “You enjoying yourself?” He asks, forcing me to look at him.

“I actually am.” I tug on his hair lightly, causing him to groan. We both averted our eyes after that. “You just have such pretty hair…”

he looked at me again, this time feeling more serious. “Are you okay?” In general? No. About the nick stuff? No. About the fact that my best friends hot brother is in my bed? Definitely.

“it’ll be fine, nick will just have to get over it…. Speaking of nick, we should probably come up with a cohesive story.” I could see it in his eyes that he didn’t think nick would care enough to grill us about our relationship. “He already accused me of letting you lie about us sleeping together to cover up a different lie… which is true, but he can’t know that.”

“ok… we’ve been talking/dating for three months. We haven’t said ‘I love you’ yet, but we both want to. The other night was the first time we ever slept together… it was great.” He winked at me after adding the last word. “You know practically everything about me and my family… is there anything that I should know about you? In case nick asks me.”

I stare at Chris, contemplating whether or not I should tell him anything.

fuck it.

“you were… myfirsttime” I rushed the last part in the hopes that he wouldn’t hear it. He looked at me confused for a second before nodding for me to continue. “I used to have a twin brother, he died when we were in seventh grade… I never had a good relationship with my parents after that, and that’s one of the reasons that I changed schools at the beginning of eighth grade.” He immediately sat upright, staring down at me with a look that I couldn’t quite decipher.

“is that why you started…” his words trailed off as he looked down at my legs. I immediately felt ten times more aware of the fact that I was in shorts.

“yeah, I really struggled with it for that first year or so… after my parents caught me in the act they sent me to a hospital over the summer.” I don’t think I’d ever seen anyone seem this interested in me, or the things that I’ve been through. “They decided to move after that… small towns, gossip… but then I met you guys, and Nick helped me out a lot.”

“I’m sorry” it was simple, I almost told him not to apologize because it wasn’t his fault, but I knew that wasn’t what he meant. “Do you want to go pick something up for breakfast?” I quickly nodded, getting up and grabbing some clothes to change into.

“”“”“”“”“”

@unbruisable @bernardsbendystraws

[vantedaes]

Not shy! 1/5 (Leon x F!Reader)

Author: @vantedaes Editor: @141s-chewtoy Pairing: Leon S Kennedy x fem reader! Word count: 2.350k Tags/Warnings: MDNI (+18) age gap, Banter, pining, romance, flirting, shy (introverted :p) reader, fluff, miscommunication, eventual smut, maybe slow burn? we'll see.

Summary:  1/5 When senior agent Leon Kennedy joined your unit the last thing you were expecting is for him to pay any attention to you let alone make you his partner, you, the outcast, shy, and officer rookie from the whole unit.

And it wouldn't be a problem if he didn't find pleasure in driving you crazy.

A/N: So here we at with my first fanfic in a long ass time (Also my first one in English be nice it's not my first language!) So i just wanted to make a wholesome banter with Death island Leon in mind! there will be eventual smut but later so buckle up to some old slow burn.

Thanks to my girl, the one, the only, the QUEEN: @141s-chewtoy for editing this nonsense and making it better and greater, ilysm bestie.

✩｡:•.───── ❁ ❁ ─────.•:｡✩✩｡:•.───── ❁ ❁ ─────.•:｡✩

When you first met Leon you thought he would never even grant a glance at you. 

As an officer researcher rookie, you were usually picked on and the spot of jokes from your whole department, it didn’t help you were the first woman to achieve that high-ranking position. It should mean you receive respect from others, right? Well apparently not, and you knew that it was partly your fault, you’ve always been introverted and also maybe kind of a pushover. 

So maybe being the target of jokes from the whole station and also having no other friends than the lunch lady —Sandy, god bless her heart, and her delicious croquettes—, was enough to make you invisible, and you were fine with that, mostly, it helped you not attract too much-unwanted attention which you hated but it also made you the odd one out that you also hated, but in the scale of things you’d rather be the quiet girl of the unit. 

Therefore you didn’t even make an effort to leave your office when everyone was running laps because the great senior agent Leon Kennedy was coming down the department.

You figured that he was another know-it-all dickhead, that would only come to you to shove your face in his big achievements and how he single handedly saved the president’s daughter and some many other stuff, cause yes you did peek at his file —What? you have access to it, you were the intel and researcher of the unit, and you had to—  Suuure, he was jaw-dropping gorgeous to say the very least but that was not the reason you sought shelter in your office, no, you just knew he had to be a fucking asshole like all the others you worked with. 

Of course, you couldn't hide forever, as much as you wanted to. Eventually, you had to face the man of the hour and oh boy you were nervous… you were so nervous that Sandy had to give you a pep talk for you to just do your job

“Girl I know he’s hotter than the Sahara desert but you can’t just miss out on your job! the guy’s been asking for the researcher for days now he thinks you’re a slacker.” 

“I’m not hiding because he’s hot! I’m just…scared he’s an egocentric idiot.” 

Sandy gave you the most ‘you think I believe an ounce of that?’ look she had ever given to you. 

“For sure honey and that’s why you have been eating in the kitchen and actively avoiding your work that you never do cause you practically breathe for this job.” 

Ugh, you hated how right she was and how much she knows you.

“Whatever.  It’s not because he’s hot, I’m just…busy with personal stuff.” 

Oh, the way she scoffed was nothing amicable. 

“Riiight, busy thirsting over the guy! I've seen the way you cling to his file, you ain’t fooling anybody and you’re sure as hell not fooling me so woman up and face him once and for all.” 

You sucked in a breath and shook your head. You knew she was mostly right, you just couldn’t avoid your work so you had to face him sooner than later… but it wasn’t because you were attracted, no, you just didn’t want to lose your time with the insufferable prick he surely was.  

It was an especially bad Friday morning when you sensed something off, could it be the fact that your coffee wasn't as warm as you usually prefer it? Or the way everyone was staring at you as you made your way to your office? Sure, you’d been coexisting with these idiots long enough to just ignore their shit but this morning they were drilling your head in with the intensity of their staring and whispering. 

You couldn't bring yourself to ask what the fuck the problem was but you soon regretted not doing so. 

Because at the other side of your private office was no other than agent Leon S. Kennedy sitting on your desk and examining your files in excruciating detail —making a total mess. You were frozen at your own door, your hand still on the handle and a part of you wanted to close the door and run away but, that wouldn't be so professional on your part and also he already had his cold blue eyes on you and, oh fuck you felt yourself trembling and clinging to your almond latte cause the pictures and the videos didn't do the  man justice… He was even hotter —and wider— in person. 

Regardless, you tried to maintain your calm and remain professional. This was your space of work and how dare he just intrude in your office! Sure you were avoiding convening with him and that was part of your job, but still! Wasn’t this a bit too much? And how did he even get into your office? You always closed it with a key, a key you and only you—oh, fucking Sandy! 

You could only snap out of your internal conflict when he called your name with that smokey-ass voice that made you weak on the knees. 

“I hope you don’t mind me barging in like this,”

Was he for real? Of fucking course you fucking minded but of course you couldn’t gather yourself to say or do anything but  just look blankly at him.

“It was the only way I could find time for us to meet since you kept avoiding me.” 

Fuck.  How did he realize that? And why did he look so amused by it? God, you knew he had to be a prick, and worst of all, and breathtaking prick.

Well, you ought to speak up for yourself because the silence was flooding the room and it wouldn’t help your case just to stay quiet and wait for him to leave. 

“Agent Kennedy, what a pleasant surprise,”  You uttered in a breathy tone, still without the strength to actually step inside. Leon raised an eyebrow and cocked a smile that just made you even more annoyed. 

Before he could even speak, you continued: “Sorry for the delay in our meeting, I’ve been busy with personal errands.” 

Ugh, at least you were good at being professional-ish.

Leon's eyes were full of something between total disbelief and something else you couldn’t really place.

Your heart almost crawled out of your chest when he approached you, so incredibly close to where you were standing as still as a damn statue. You could do nothing whatsoever as his huge physique came so fucking close to you and you almost felt like fainting when his arm reached behind you to just close the damn door. However, judging by the smug grin he had on his lips, he knew exactly what he was doing.

Your eyes were fixated on his huge chest and the veins on his neck, your nostrils absorbing the delicious scent of cologne and something citric… Dear god, this man was a danger walking.

You could only breathe again when he finally gave you personal space. 

“Sorry, don’t like the ogling eyes.” 

He said smoothly, returning to your messed-up desk. You were at a loss for words as you tried to regain some confidence to answer him. He had some nerve to keep meddling in your stuff and— wait, was he holding the file you had on him?

“Hey! Keep your nose out of my stuff!” 

Well, that was out of character for you, the way you snatched the folder out of his pretty hands like a toddler wanting their toy back. The coffee —that by this point was cold —in your other hand almost spilled on your carpeted floor.

You just tugged the file with your hand while he looked at you in surprise, clearing your throat and taking a step back. Now you probably needed to explain why you had a really specific file of him on your desk in the first place…

One that looked like it was thoroughly reviewed over and over again, and also had many pictures of him… 

At least the look in his eyes  —which were still full of amusement — prompted some explanation. 

 “What? I’m the researcher, I needed to know who you were before the meeting,”

As if anyone could believe that, he certainly didn’t, but god knows you were going to cling to your lie like it was the truest truth ever. 

“When they told me you were shy I wasn’t expecting this.” 

You scoffed and rolled your eyes, trying to move freely in your space around him. You carefully saved his file on your cabinet and just threw the fucking cold coffee in the trash, it was ruined anyway.

“Not shy, introverted.” You corrected, trying to get behind your desk. He looked at you still with a smug grin on his lips, he was enjoying making you nervous and annoyed. 

Before he could make another clever remark, you stopped him. 

“Listen Agent Kennedy, I would appreciate it if  in the future —”

“Call me Leon.” 

What? 

“I’m sorry?” 

“You have nothing to apologize for, please call me Leon.” 

Oh but wasn’t he just a fucking smooth operator.

“Listen, Leon,” Oh your patience was running thin, and it wasn’t helping that he kept looking at you with that smug grin and those huge arms  —like seriously, huge — crossed, just owning your personal space like it was nothing.

“Right now I don’t have any time for you, so I would appreciate it if in the future you don’t just break into my office.” 

Firm, professional, you felt proud of how you handled it. Cause right now you just really wanted to erase that smug expression from his face with a slap. Of course, he could be a real smoke show but he was just getting on your nerves with all his…all of him, really. 

Nevertheless, he continued to just sit on your desk giving zero fucks about how much you wanted him gone. Clearly he was having a great time making you uncomfortable and maybe a little flustered. It wasn't like you to yell or have a bad attitude towards anyone really, but you were having a hard time remaining cool in front of this smug man who kept meddling in your papers! 

"Do you mind?!" 

You said almost in a yell. Leon giggled, looking at you innocently. 

"I don't mind at all."  

You opened your mouth in disbelief,  he was just toying with you now. 

"Listen kitten— Can I call you kitten?"

"No, you may not!" 

Now you were sure you were red as a tomato.

"So, kitten, I understand your annoyance but I think we’re even, given your very specific investigation about me I could say that we both broke personal boundaries.”  

You were speechless, he was somehow right but clearly, you were not going to give him the satisfaction of agreeing with him. He was the one who broke into your office and he was the one who’s all in your personal space. How dare he compare your innocent file of everything you could find of him with this? Pfft, you did nothing wrong. 

“Now that we are somewhat acquainted, there should not be any problem with us working together.”  He leaned in and you felt your breath catch in your throat, “Closely, together.” 

What now? 

Leon kept staring at you, scanning your every reaction, almost savoring your internal struggles like he could read them completely. 

“Wh—What do you mean?” You asked in a tremulous voice.

Something in Leon’s eyes flickered as he bit his lower lip and almost suppressed a chuckle. 

“You know, because you’re the best researcher and the first line of intel it makes sense that we work alongside one another.” 

Ok, you were having an actual breakdown and it showed. What did he mean about that? Well, you knew what he meant but like what did he really mean? That you were going to have to see him every day? You could barely bear this unexpected intrusion and now he's telling you that you're going to be working partners? You didn’t do partners, you worked alone, you researched and informed the headquarters and that was it. 

Leon kept looking at you with his head slightly tilted to the side, clearly enjoying your reaction. You sucked in a breath, trying to collect yourself. 

“Is it really necessary?” 

And it was the only thing you thought to ask, you knew Leon was there to join your unit and it did make sense what he was saying but a part of you just wanted it to be a lie. You didn’t know how much you could bear having someone like him all over you at all times, the thought of it just made you…quiver. 

And no, it wasn’t because he was incredibly hot and unbelievably gorgeous, no, it wasn’t because his mere presence made your heart race and your insides burn and of course, it wasn’t because the sound of his voice and that stupid grin and the way he just called you kitten made your panties soaked in a fucking second. 

Fuck, you couldn’t be thinking of that when he was still right in front of you like a fucking predator smelling how aroused his little victim was…

Ok, you really needed to stop now.

Leon chuckled, “Don’t worry, I won’t bother you too much, kitten.” 

That fucking nickname again, your panties were as soaked as they could get. 

“Stop calling me that.” 

You tried to sound more serious than strangled but failed completely, Leon cracked another one of his fucking smirks and you felt the heat in your body increase, god, you weren’t sure if he annoyed you as much as he turned you on. 

God no, he just annoyed you, that’s all. 

“Why? It fits you perfectly, a shy kitten.” 

Oh god, you could kill him.

“I’m not shy. I’m introverted!” You exclaimed, feeling your face burning up, “And certainly not a kitten!” 

Sandy better fucking get her hands ready making you all the croquettes you wanted, she owes you one after this. 

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for throwing out a gift?

I (17f) recently saw my bio dad again. He was in my life solidly until I was nine, then he left for rehab and I only saw him when my grandparents drive me about an hour to see him. It wasn't until I was older that I was told he was gone for rehab btw. COVID hit and visits (which at this point were maybe twice a year) stopped. Then he was arrested for drug possession a little over a year ago and went to prison. By the time he got out I hadn't seen him for a good three or four years. When I was younger I was desperate for him to come back, but now I've finally figured myself out and I'm mostly indifferent towards him. My mom remarried when I was very young, and my stepfather has been my dad for my whole life that I can remember.

I've seen my bio dad twice so far, and the second visit he got me a birthday present. Beads (dollarama, but he doesn't have a job so I can't fault him too much) and a handmade bracelet with those letter beads spelling my first and middle name.

It seems kinda low effort, but he said he thought jewelry was probably a good bet. (I am 17. I drive. I pay for gas. I have a job that I work substantial hours at. Beads aren't really jewelry.)

I wasn't sure what to do with the bracelet, but looking at it gave me this uncomfortable squirmy feeling in my chest. I was driving with a friend and I had told her about it, and she agreed that I should throw it out the window when I asked. I did, and I felt relieved, but now I'm oscillating between feeling guilty and justified.

On one hand it's clear that he's putting effort in, on the other hand I don't WANT it. It's a childish gift, and I feel like he should have put effort in when i was younger and it mattered. I know addiction is a disease, and I'm not blaming him for that. I am blaming him for not caring enough to be a parent to me. I know he would be hurt if he found out, but I just couldn't keep it. I am not a little girl anymore, but he just doesn't seem to see it. It's clear he feels bad about not being there, but it seems like I only just got myself straightened out over his absence and I don't know how to deal with him now. I want to think I don't need to be guilty, but I can't get rid of the feeling. Am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?