#which is like. a normal ass thing for a 12 year old to want?? to be independent and grown up??

[susiephone]

childhood was just a long series of adults being like "don't judge a book by its cover!" and "treat others the way you want to be treated!" and then turning around and making the wildest snap judgments about people based on TINY amounts of information and expecting you to agree

[lizardho]

I was like 11-12 years old when I figured out at a boring-ass church activity that you could put rocks into little plastic spoons and then pelt people who annoyed me with them. I did this for the rest of the activity, and at Sunday dinner the next night was bragging about my victory (cornering the mean kid who picked on my youngest brother and pelting him with rocks). One of my cousins was like “no way, that sounds SO fun! Let’s do that RIGHT NOW!” So we grabbed spoons and went and got pebbles from the back yard and launched them at each other.

The problem was my grandma sold her soul for the world’s most resilient plastic spoons so we could launch those fuckers HARD. I gave out welts like candy on Halloween, and I got them back in kind.

So we resorted to taking cover and giggling until we got whacked, then yelping, then returning fire.

My cousin hid in my grandpa’s little fishing boat. It was a good boat, but simple and honestly underused. We didn’t know the little windows on it, meant to keep the wind out of my grandpa’s face while he drove, were cracking. However, they were definitely cracking. Eventually it became obvious and we realized we had been being dumb.

This was NOT the first time in my life I’d been dumb roughhousing and broken something, and I had developed a reputation in my family as being “suicidally honest” so I was the one to deliver the bad news. My grandpa let out a pretty good chuckle and said it was OK, tousled my hair, and asked my grandma to bring me cake. I am not kidding. I learned later he hated his boat and only bought it for his kids’ sakes, since he thought everyone needed to know how to fish. At the time though I was just bewildered and pleased at my good fortune. FINALLY, at long last, being honest and telling the truth about breaking something expensive was getting me cake. I knew if I kept trying it would eventually serve me, and now so had CAKE. I was pleased as could be.

My dad, on the other hand, was livid. He LOVED that boat. He spent several weeks each summer recovering from breaking ribs in that boat every year for about 7 years prior to this incident. He had great memories and memories that boat. So he told my Grandma NO cake for me AND that I’d be coming by this weekend to fix stuff around the house and pay for the broken window with my babysitting/lawn mowing money.

Obviously I was devastated, but that felt more in-line with the way things normally went when I broke something expensive so I just figured it was OK. My grandpa gave my grandma a look and sadly said “Ok, have her here on Saturday to help me with some yard work.”

That Saturday my dad woke me up at 6:00 sharp and drove me, sleepy and bewildered, to my grandpa’s house. He was mumbling under his breath the whole time but he thought he was teaching me consequences for my actions so he was ultimately OK with it.

We get to my grandpa’s house at 6:15. My grandpa is outside with a ladder hanging Christmas lights. The lawn is freshly mowed, the trees and garden are weeded and well-tended to, the carnations in the front yard look immaculate, and my grandpa has this giddy mischievous look on his face. He tells me he was so excited that I was coming over that he couldn’t sleep, so he did all the yard work himself. He asked me to help him put up Christmas lights and decorate the Christmas tree, which I did, then said that because I was such a good helper I could have some pancakes for breakfast. I was sent home with the slice of cake I had been denied the week before, wrapped to keep it as fresh as possible.

The whole way home my dad looked a little miffed, but told me that he was glad I had been honest and was proud of me for helping grandpa. I know he wanted me to Learn a Lesson™️the cowboy way, like he had as a kid, but didn’t have much room to complain since I’d still been Put To Work.

I think that was a lesson for both of us, although I’m not totally sure what it was supposed to show me. I think it was my grandpa’s way of showing my dad that discipline without tenderness doesn’t count as much. He died last year and I miss him terribly, as does my dad. I hope that my story of victory, drama, punishment, and ultimately a secret second victory is meaningful to someone else out there, but if not it still means a lot to me ❤️

[inupibaldspot]

Even 12 years laters,your soul was in a color of kindness.

Pairing : Gojo Satoru x Reader

Note ₊˚⊹♡ : purely self indulgent which I wrote when I was drunk so— some stuffs are funky

Gojo first met you when you where four.

He was five years old at that time too and was being escorted by a maid to go to the clan head meeting; he assumes you were also part of a clan brought by elders.

Normally, the white haired boy never really cared for other people. Why should he? He is the chosen one. He has the limitless technique plus the six eyes of the Gojo clan. He was the closest thing to God at this age. But today it was different.

He watched you turn your head around and stare at him, he could vividly remember the way your eyes shone with amazement either for something as superficial like his white hair or the fact he was recognized as The ‘Gojo Satoru.’

But after that amazement, you smiled. You smiled at him so bright, with the evening glow of sunlights made you so—so ethereal. Your smile was childish and that’s why it was simply pure; the white haired kid’s eyes silhouetted with the sunlight shone with surprise for he found you beautiful in ways he couldn’t describe.

Gojo looks away— he beat himself for looking away as that made him look standoffish. When he looks back, you were staring at him confused for why he didn’t greet you back.

The maid beside you turns and says something, as you nod and then walk away. Was it weird for Gojo to wish you would simply turn to him and introduce yourself? For years to come, he prayed that he’d love to hear your name; for your soul was in a color of kindness.

That chance came in twelve years later when he was a second year of his Jujutsu Tech. Him and his friends, Geto and Shoko wanted to meet the new first years. There is Nanami Kento, had a huge stick up his ass but that it self made him to be forever victim to Gojo’s pranks. Next was Haibara Yū, a bright eyed kid but Gojo found him to be a bit too— energetic for his taste.

And then you. I didn’t really need to describe Nanami and Haibara first because the first and only person he saw ever since he entered the first year’s classroom was you. Simply you. You sitting on the chair smiling bashfully at them. At him.

Ever since, every day. Without fail would rush to your side. At first you were confused as that is not the Gojo you remembered l; the one you saw and described to you by others were not this.

Nevertheless it warmed you up like a cool evening sun.

Gojo released quite early was you were kind, the type that would help others despite of her time , the type who would help every elderly by the street, the type who would feed strays and yada-yada-flowers and rainbows.

But that led to another realization. Had you truly different been treated differently?

Gojo's body tensed up. Any comfortable vibe he had felt before vanishing in an instant. He had known very well that you were a kind-hearted human being. Welcoming and warm. That made you so interesting. Your soul was so calm and simple and nice.

And even though he had observed you so closely before he wasn't able to recall any moment anymore where your own feelings had been obvious. You didn't stutter around boys.

You didn't blush. You didn't hesitate in a way which could be trailed back to her personal feelings.

Were you treating him like everyone else after all?

“Gojo?”

Your voice brought him back to sense, you were blinking curious, leaned close—so close.”what’s wrong?”

“Bring out your hand.” He smiles, as you did without question. “Guess the word I’m writing on your hand.” He smiles when the warmth from your hand soothe his nervous heartbeat.

“Eh—I’m not good at kanji!”

“That’s just too bad—!”

From then when ever Gojo feels anxious of everything—everything in this world he would play this game, with your fingers and her palm because his focus on you was more gravitating rather than that as you were simply too calming.

Geto felt slightly hesitant when he saw the type of Gojo he would become when he was by your side, he was a tad abit careless as if all of his six eyes were simply focused on you, he would be a tad bit kinder to the point Nanami gets the ick.

Where as Shoko had a blast!

She would make way towards you, give kisses on your cheeks gushing on how cute you were, wrapping her arms around you as she then sends a condescending look towards Gojo who was literally drowning in jealousy.

Shoko and you got close early on and more so because you two were the only two girls in those years. To the point where even a shy person like you was influenced to sneaking into a party with Shoko.

“Please don’t mess with my hair curler, Gojo.” You say as you look into the mirror, fixing your earring and from the corner of your eyes you could see Gojo holding up a lick of his hair into the hot iron.

Gojo peers over and immediately regrets it, you were in a short dress and high heel, hair curled so—cutely and boy, your face.

He looks away.

No, too cute.

He thought as he lets down the curling iron. Shoko peers out as she lets out a puff of smoke before passing it to Geto, who takes the cigarette in his hands. “Don’t tell me you want to come Gojo.” Shoko says. “I want a girls night.”

Gojo remember almost comically crying into his pillows as Geto nags him on ‘how woman don’t like clingy guys.’ He decides to forget Shoko and join you guys anyways.

He remembers being strangled by Shoko while you him a nervous smile trying to diffuse the situation.

Your nervous smile which made the world freeze to him, Geto sighs at the love sick look his white haired friend was giving you, who seemed so obvious to.

But don’t you remember when I said you were kind. You were kind like to help the cornered kid, the type who would volunteer to be with the loner kid, the type that picked Geto Suguru’s side.

Gojo sighs when when remembers Shoko saying you said something along the lines of ‘I don’t want Geto to be lonely along the path he takes…’

How stupid!

Gojo Satoru where ever he went would go around town mentally keeping sense of any cursed energy which could relay you back to him.

He meets you again though.

12 years later, while him and now—principle Yaga were walking along the hallways they sense a breach in security. He rushes over to first, see his once best-friend Geto Suguru by his current first year Okkotsu Yuta and secondly, you. Your eyes we’re nervously flying around before it lands on him and once again he was yours; Geto scoffs at the sight of Gojo’s expression when he was looking at you. He was almost worried that if you said ‘let’s join Geto’ with a plea—se, he just might. You just had that effect on Gojo.

But too bad, Geto was here to request war upon the Jujutsu Tech. On the 24 December, Night Parade of a Hundred Demons.

Gojo rushes through curses as he makes his way towards you; and when he does, he feels as if he can’t breath. “Can you come back…?” He takes a step closer.

You smile nervously,shaking your head as you watch him take another step closer to you, you felt his hands reach out and cup your face. His face was so close to yours, you could feel the warmth radiate off him in the cold winter air. “Don’t kill me for doing this.” You we’re reminded that you guys were enemies and in a battlefield.

His face was closer now, his blue—beautiful blue eyes were slightly closed. You breath out. “I can’t kill you through your ‘Limitless’ Satoru…”

“Say it again.”

“Huh…?”

“My name. Satoru…”

You breath out. “Satoru…” The name you accidentally let out, felt so right.

“Fuck… say it a million time more, love.” Gojo laughs, slightly hoarse. “My limitless is never activated when I’m with you…”

before you realize his lips were on yours. The kiss was soft, as you hands were tentatively placed on his chest, as his hand trails along to your waist you parts your lips for him, sighs in his mouth, and that small sound of pleasure drives him crazy, floods his body with heat and desire so intense the strongest sorcerer can hardly stand.

Your are pulled away from him, when a darker and tall man goes by. “Miguel!” Gojo listened to you say.

“I need you to focus.” The man says smiling, before he takes a stance to fight Gojo. And to Miguel credit, he does fend off Gojo well, so— well that he was ‘recruited’ by him.

The day ends with Gojo losing two of his best friends in different ways. Geto would be gone, into the afterlife ended by his own hands.

But you?

Where were you? Would he meet you again 12 years later? Love?

[theloneotaku158]

As of Batman: The Brave and the Bold #12, local precious-gremlin-who-I-would-die-for, Maps Mizoguchi, is now officially(?) the sixth Robin. Or at the very least, she's now "in" on The Secret™.

If this isn’t a set up for her taking up the Robin mantle officially then I genuinely don’t know what is.

As one of the twelve Gotham Academy enjoyers in existence, I am having the extremely normal reaction of "FUCKING FINALLY! LET'S FUCKING GOOOOO--!"

In all honesty, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't seen this coming from miles away. Like, Maps has appeared in a number of seemingly random cameo roles recently, including Batgirls (2021), and even technically as Robin in the backup issues of Batman (2016) #119-121, and in a short story in Batman Black & White. And most of those got collected in a standalone titled "Maps of Mystery", which specifically gathered all her appearances as Robin (and the Gotham Academy Belle Reve story).

And then, of course, her recent time-travelling Future-Trunks-esque appearance in Birds of Prey (2023), as the tech-based Meridian, from a potential future timeline where she apparently makes it as a superhero using gadgets she apparently designed, proving that she's hero material.

That's not something you do for a character for no reason. That's the sort of thing you do when you want to keep a character in the conscience of your readers for whatever reason, because you have bigger plans for them.

Also interesting to consider that, in the "Mother's Day" story where this took place, Alfred is standing right there and not lying down six feet under wood, dirt and a stone slab, and that Bruce is in the old Batcave under the manor so he still has Money™. So we must assume this was some nebulous time in the past (after GA: Second Semester(?), but before City of Bane)... which I won't bother to analyse the exact timeframe of because DC doesn't care about the post-Flashpoint / New 52 / Rebirth / Prime Earth / idfk / Dawn of DC timeline, so neither should I.

But I think it's really funny that this presumably means Maps has known The Secret™ for a long time relative to present-day comics, but always acted like she didn't.

But if all her appearances are in chronological order, that means Bruce is only the fourth Bat whose identity she discovered.

Like, she discovered Cass' identity almost by accident on a trip to the zoo, Damian showed off his grapple gun and gave her an actual Batarang during the three hours he was enrolled in the school (as if she wouldn't immediately put two-and-two together even back then), and she even found out Terry fucking McGuinness would become Batman in a future via a time-travelling grandfather clock.

No I did not make that last part up. Read Gotham Academy istg.

Did Cass know that Maps had been acting as a Robin when she met her, both at the zoo in Batgirls and her future version in Birds of Prey?

Does Damian know the one (1) friend(?) he made in Gotham Academy is potentially in the running for his job?

Is Bruce himself aware that she knows as much about their identities as she currently does?

How is DC going to retcon this so it all makes sense in the barely-functioning canon of the modern DC universe?

I'm digressing. Where was I going with this?

Point is, she's destined to become a Robin, and I'm glad DC finally pulled their fingers out their asses and capitalised on that destiny.

Let's just hope it doesn't take another year for them to follow up on this plotline again.

Bonus: Jason Todd, after learning of Bruce taking yet another happy kid under his wing as yet another Robin, giving her some advice:

[cakelitter]

Between Me and You Major Leon x Fem Reader !one shot!

summary: Leon catches feelings for new apprentice

content: slight NSFW, mentions of masturbation, age gap, reader is 22, death island Leon

words: 2.2k

a/n: longest one I've written so far, don't really plan on it being a series but we'll see. Not my proudest work though.

⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ * *⋆·˚ ༘

It’s October 7th, one of the many days that Leon dreads. Why? Cause a new batch of trainees come waltzing through the doors of the DSO after applying to be here. Why is that such a big deal? Cause he was assigned to be their major, their coach, their superior, whatever you want to call it. You can write that title in a cursive font in pink and decorate it with pretty bows and pearls and he’d still fucking hate it.

Seeing these eager young men and women willingly sign themselves up to work in this field is practically suicide. Most of them walk in here wanting to be a cool agent the way they are portrayed in shows and movies, you know blowing shit up, saving the day and picking up a hot new chick on the way. Bullshit.

The process of becoming an agent is usually the training period which takes about 12 to 15 months, then when the trainee is ready they get sent to sign the DSO contract as the final step of the way. Reality is, the minute that contract is signed and you are assigned your first mission, is the minute that most trainees realize what they signed up for. Pain, suffering, and restless nights are all part of the job. Most rookie agents regret going down this path but by then it would be too late to turn back, not like that’s an option.

Every year it’s the same song and dance, he argues with the higher-ups over this position the same way he did 6 years ago, and of course he never succeeded at winning those battles. “The DSO’s Golden Boy” more like their bitch, his only way of escaping this hell is to reach the age of retirement, or maybe they’ll keep slaving his old ass till his heart eventually gives out only to be replaced by someone else 20 minutes later.

The sound of his boot’s echoes through the hallway as he makes his way to the gym where this year’s victims await. His hand holds the folders of trainees for this year which he never bothered to look through beforehand, why ruin the surprise? The door opens and he is greeted by a sight he’s seen too many times, trainees standing in a straight line waiting for him. He takes a deep breath and walks in.

“Sorry for being late, had a few things to take care of”

The tension in the room only seems to increase as he starts making his way to the first person in line while opening the folders. He checks the name enlisted then looks at the face of the person in front him, studying their face and body language before making mental assumptions of whether this person has it in them to make it to the finish line, a game he likes to play to make things more fun, for him at least, and so far each year he always guessed it right.

Everything is going the way it normally does, nothing out of the ordinary till he reaches the last person in line. A girl’s name, interesting hadn’t had a female trainee in a while, that’s a way to spice things up for this year. He looks up from his folder to your face.

You poor thing.

Puppy eyes looking up at him is an understatement, how could such a sweet thing as you end up here? You’re pretty, a little too pretty actually. Shoulders tensed, hands fidgety, lips practically trembling, this process must feel so scary for you. The light coming from the nearby window alluding your soft features, you just might be the most angelic thing he’s ever seen and you’re expected to kill bioweapons? Your lips look so- he’s staring. Fuck.

Your tense expression turns into a confused one as he studies your features before snapping back from whatever planet he was on and walks away to stand where he could be seen by everyone before beginning to give them the same speech he gave to hundreds before them.

⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚

Two months have passed since then and he would be a liar if he said you weren’t the one catching his eye the most. He assumed your elimination would be easy, l mean look at you, you look like you don’t have it in you to kill a fly. But he fell for the oldest rick in the book and did the biggest mistake of underestimating his opponent, you managed to pass your first monthly evaluation with flying colors, and still doing great so far. Sure, you have some weak points, but you excel in knife skills and defenses.

He watches the way you behave, your expressions, movements, your habits, you’ve become more of a lab rat to him to analyze, a cute rat at that though, maybe a guinea pig. What the fuck is he even talking about.

Albeit he spent the past two months studying you, you still manage to make moves leaving him perplexed on how you even managed to think about that. It’s like you have a trick up your sleeves each time that he genuinely can’t predict. You manage to take on men twice your size and come out unscathed, then without fail, after each match you win, you give him that stupid smile which is full of pride and that screams  “Did you see that!”

You’re so desperate for his approval it’s adorable, the way your face lights up when he compliments your strategy and technique, the way you memorized and learned some of his signature moves and incorporated it into your work, and the way you take note of his comments and work on improving your self instead of throwing a tantrum like the rest.

Ok fine maybe, perhaps, possibly he has favorites, but someone like you surely deserves the special treatment. So what if you did a mistake that could’ve gotten your entire team killed? So what if you were 15 minutes late a couple of times? Would he have lost his shit of someone else did that? No doubt, but it’s you so it’s fine.

He knew that he had a problem when once you were going up against one of your fellow trainees and they ended up going too far and hurting you, he almost kicked him out of the program on the spot. The injury wasn’t severe, a cut on your thigh, nothing a few bandages couldn’t fix, a wound that he decided to treat himself when there is a whole infirmary upstairs...

“Does it hurt?”

“Squeeze my hand if it burns too bad”

“It’s okay, you’re okay”

Is all he can remember whispering to you, as tears brimmed in your eyes from the burning sensation of the alcohol making contact with the open wound. Afterwards you were limping like a kicked puppy for a couple of days. Maybe if he kissed it better it would’ve healed faster? Get a grip Kennedy.

Once you had a knife move you were struggling with so he offered to spend a few hours extra to help you with it. He demonstrated the way it’s done but you still got it wrong, so he walked behind you grabbing your hand which in turn was holding the knife. His back was pressed against yours as he bent down a bit to reach your level making his mouth dangerously close to your ear. The calloused skin on his hand was juxtaposing the soft one on yours while the scent of your shampoo filled his nostrils, his voice was husky as he spoke softly to you as if you were made out of glass.

“You need to do it more swiftly, no need to be so stiff with it.”

You nodded eagerly, as he guided your hands once more. In the past 6 years of training, he has never even once spoke this sweetly to one of his apprentices before, hell he never even offered spending extra time after his shift to help them.

“Got it?”

“Yes, major.”

Yeah, he jerked off after that. Felt extremely guilty afterwards, he could hear Claire’s voice calling him a creepy old man, a crib robber, disgusting, the list goes on, before chopping his dick off. Like there is only a 16 year old age gap it could be worse… That’s a sentence he never thought he would say.

He sat on his couch staring blankly, you’re giving him a mid-life crisis without even knowing it. And so he made the decision of pushing you away, that means no longer letting you get away with things by simply batting your eyelashes at him, no more giving you extra praise, no more giving you extra attention. And you know what, for the first 3 days he was doing great, treating you like the others and being the major he’s supposed to be from the beginning, cold and professional, just like the man that trained him. The look on your face when you flashed him your bright smile and he didn’t reciprocate like usual made him want to die right then and there, but it had to be done.

Everything was going according to plan…that was until he was in his office doing paperwork when you knocked on his door asking to speak. You walked in and sat on the chair in front of his desk as he watched you.

“Major, is everything okay?- Like did I do something wrong?”

He took in a deep breath and sighed, how is he supposed to tell you why he’s doing this?

‘No, I just have a massive crush on you at my prehistoric age’ this is getting ridiculous.

“No, why would you think that?” Playing dumb, a classic.

“Well ,I don’t know, you just seem like you’re upset with me. Is my performance lacking?

God, you’re dense, totally clueless on what’s going on, either that or you’re also playing dumb and now you’re both clowns in this circus, except this circus sucks and it’s also on fire.

“No no, you’re performance is fine I just uh-“

You tilt you head to the side raising your brows a bit.

“I’ve just been having a couple of rough days is all, you can go back now.”

You nod and smile before thanking him, he nods back and smiles slightly and just like that you leave. Great job Leon, congrats on coming up with the worst lie in history and sending your self back to square one. He doubts that he even thinks anymore when he’s around you, maybe he should get put down, that way hopefully in his next life he can fall in love with someone his age, have a kid or two, and work a normal nine to five job.

⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ * *⋆·˚ ༘

A couple months have passed since that day, and his feelings for you are still going strong. You had him on his knees every night praying- no, begging god for the ability to simply move on, when the last time he stepped into a church was back in high school. Do you have that effect on every person that has ever liked you or is it just him that’s losing his moral compass?

He’s now sitting in a meeting room with the higher-ups as they discuss the status of the trainees so far. Being completely honest, he isn’t even registering a word they are saying till he suddenly heard your name being said and that was enough to draw his attention. They are now discussing you.

“We’ve been looking recently at her performance and she’s doing great. Isn’t that right Mr. Kennedy?”

“You can say that yes, but there is still some improvement to be done in some departments”

“Well, her skills are certainly developing very quickly considering the short period she’s been here. We’re considering giving her another week or so before considering her ready. Some other organizations have also seen her files and performance and are actually requesting her to transf-“

“She’s not ready”

His voice interrupts one of the higher-ups. Transfer? Leaving the program? A week? He won’t see you anymore?

“Training period should be a minimum of a year and she’s only been here for six months. I-”

“That’s not up for debate Mr.Kennedy. We already made our decision.”

You’re more than ready, he knows that. He simply just doesn’t want to accept the fact that you’re gonna be gone soon. You’ve just recently started getting closer to each other, spending some time alone practicing together, you’ve gotten so good at combat you’re almost as good as him. He even starting telling you some of his stupid jokes.  And now you’re leaving? He’s been so distracted with what he was feeling and forgot about how your time together is limited, that one day you’re going to leave to do what you always planned on doing. He’s in too deep and doubts that he’d be able to move on easily, but at the same time he can’t just confess.

The more he thinks about it the more he realizes how much this situation is a lose-lose no matter what, he can either, never tell you and watch you walk out that door, or he could tell you and have you be absolutely disgusted with him and then walk out that door. Unless… no, no way.

He lets these thoughts marinate in his head as he decides his next move. And a few days later, he decides to bite the bullet and tell you. He’d never forgive himself if he found out later on that he had a chance but lost it. And so as you were walking down the hallway you hear a familiar masculine voice call out to you.

“My office, we need to talk”

⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ * *⋆·˚ ༘ *

[a-substantial-trash-pile]

hey guess what. it's finally time for my Stardew Valley Loredump. i’m about to ramble about my farmer and yo-yo/yoba and shane in a probably long-ass, disjointed post because i have a problem ok. not expecting anyone to read it all of course—just want to finally write these brainstorming shenanigans down. the loredump will be below the cut below the image 👇 (WARNING: IT'S LONG):

SAMUEL IZAWA:

*samuel is 28 years old, pan, japanese okinawan (no im not self projecting hahaha), and goes by he/they. main thing is that they’re from “our world” where stardew valley is a video game, but he died and ended up in the stardew universe. because i think isekai tropes are fun and silly. as the player, samuel can do things others in the stardew world can’t do, such as: 

summon the in-game HUD that’s only visible to him, so he can see health/energy levels and inventory and all that.

speaking of inventory, it’s essentially a pocket dimension samuel can shove stuff in. the inventory doesn’t really care about size/weight/etc as long as it’s something the system considers an “item.” so like samuel can put a whole ass four poster bed in there but he can’t do that to a person or a whole house. samuel just needs to touch the item to make it disappear into his inventory. he can then summon it back out when he needs it. the game’s inventory limit system remains the same. samuel gets 12 slots on their own, but if they have a bag on them it increases to 36.

can access the player menu you can normally access in game. so like profile, skills, collections, relationships, etc are all there. no options or quit tab though. having the relationship tab is a nightmare for samuel, who has major insecurities about what people think of him. that tab is a quantifiable measure on how much people like him. it a real brain demon for him to know it exists and is right there for him to access anytime. 

can see the “stats” of food and healing items. hp/energy recovery amounts, buffs, etc. 

*funny thing is that samuel has never played SDV himself and only has knowledge based on what he’s heard and seen online secondhand. ironically he was planning on playing the game for the first time before the whole dying thing ruined it. they can’t even remember how they died, but it doesn’t bother them as much as they think it should. they didn’t leave much behind in that life.

*anyway, i’m talking a lot of game terms here, but don’t get it twisted. while samuel has all these game systems going on, the SDV world is very much a real one that doesn’t normally work by that logic. by that i mean time flows normally like in our world and there isn’t just 4 months in a year. things exist outside the valley. there’s a whole planet of places and people. 

*luckily samuel has help in navigating this new world in the form of yo-yo the junimo, who is the first living thing samuel sees when he first wakes up in that joja cubicle. yo-yo helps explain a lot of things and guide samuel around in its own abrasive way. he’s also there to be like, “hey i gave you a second chance at life so you kinda owe me actually. sign this contract.” and samuel, who is a pushover and also confused, is just like, “ok.” (yo-yo sounds like danny devito btw. because i think it’s funny.) 

*i call the contract a “magical girl contract” because that’s essentially what it is. samuel gets access to extra powers/abilities on top the stuff he can already do as a player. in return he fights monsters n shit for yo-yo and generally does things for them that they can’t do easily on their own. the extra benefits include: 

higher pain tolerance. which isn’t always a good thing. especially when you tend to not be great with self-preservation like samuel is. 

can heal most injuries by just eating/drinking stuff to regain hp.

yo-yo can teleport the both of them around as needed, but it’s tiring and it drains a lot of magic. distance matters too.

yo-yo can spawn items but it drains magic as well. the more valuable/rare the item, the more draining it is. spawning items is already a magic-intensive thing in the first place. also yo-yo isn’t creating the item out of nothing. they’re actually randomly taking it from wherever it already exists in the world. for example, say yo-yo “spawns” a jar of pickles. somebody in the world is going to open their fridge and discover their jar of pickles is missing or maybe a grocery store will have a sudden empty spot on its shelf. yo-yo doesn’t have control of where the items are taken from (or so they claim).

samuel and yo-yo’s magic pools became connected so they can both do more than they could do on their own before. this is one of the reasons why yo-yo wanted a contract with samuel, who has a larger magic pool than normal due to being from another world. but it’s possible for one side to use up all the magic for the both of them. 

*samuel’s personality can be summed up as Awkward People-Pleasing Tired Sad Garbage Dork. either he’s dressed like a grandparent in sweaters and turtlenecks or he’s wearing a button up shirt with the collar undone and jeans. they usually have their neck covered in public to hide the mark of yoba embedded there. he has a “resting bitch face” as some may call, but that’s just because his brain is busy over-analyzing 193828 different things. he loves being outside in the grass and dirt, looking at bugs n shit. he’s also a nerd who likes to play video games and ramble about the lore in them (he likes RPGs the most, but if the game’s got a good story and cool world, he’s into it). they like to do things with their hands like model building/painting. in their new stardew life, they get into woodcarving after willy teaches them the basics (he carves shane a little chicken). 

*samuel does NOT know how to say “no.” absolute pushover. their self-worth is based on how much they’re liked by others, which isn’t healthy obviously. he has a fear that the only way he can be liked is by being useful. he’s scared that he is inherently a bad and selfish person, because he can’t say for sure if he’s helping others purely out of kindness or because it just makes him feel better about existing. deep down there’s anger/frustration that’s accumulated over the years, anger towards himself and also others because he’s always doing things for other people—going above and beyond—but it never feels like enough. at the same time though, they hate it when these thoughts come up because they believe that you shouldn’t go into helping somebody expecting that you’ll get something out of it. he hates how much of a hypocrite he is. he hates how he bases so much of his self-worth on the opinions of others, but feels helpless to it. they usually just push these emotions down because samuel feels guilty about them. how can they be a good person if they’re thinking like this? how can they deserve to exist with this mindset? however they get a chance to let out the anger/bitterness/frustration through fighting monsters. kind of disassociating in a way. this also isn’t a good thing because his demeanor is much colder and scarier during combat. having someone who’s felt powerless for so long suddenly gain power is a dangerous thing.

*this mindset when monster fighting shatters when samuel meets krobus and realizes that monsters aren’t just the simple enemy NPCs their brain had been automatically categorizing them as. guilt galore. he gets real depressed about that for a while but yo-yo, krobus, and shane are there to help him. 

*SPEAKING OF SHANE… it’s crush at first sight for samuel because hot damn is shane their type. i mean just look at him. mamma mia. haha anyyyway, they first meet at the stardrop saloon. samuel’s waiting at the bar for his to-go order near where shane is drinking. shane’s looking sad, so samuel gives in and decides they’ll start a convo to maybe distract him from whatever’s bothering him. samuel employs the “crack a dumb joke to hide the fact that i’m nervous because i’m talking to a hot person and then use that opening to introduce myself” strat. shane, being an asshole, is like, “oh so you’re the new farmer. here’s a tip: don’t bother me.” samuel takes 999 damage and their brain immediately goes “THIS IS MY FAULT I FUCKED UP like who wants to be talked to by a stranger when they’re sad goddammit why am i so bad at this?!!” it’s overall not a great first impression. after that, samuel tries to avoid shane out of embarrassment, but circumstances keep making them run into each other. for instance, samuel works a lot with marnie with her being a mentor figure to him in animal husbandry, so he and shane have a lot of opportunity to interact through that (plus marnie is secretly trying to get them closer to each other). through these meetings and shenanigans, samuel and shane get to know each other better until one day they’re friends. then good friends. then best friends. then kiss friends. then marry friends. :)

YOBA (A.K.A. YO-YO): 

*yo-yo is ????? years old and goes by any pronouns but most of the time it's it/they.

*yo-yo is actually THE yoba, but they’re not the completely benevolent creator-of-all-things humans have made them out to be. maybe they were in the past, but now they’re selfish and rude and swear a lot. but they do still care, even if they don’t admit it (tsundere-ass). yoba is currently stuck in the form of a little junimo and is substantially weakened because it gave too much of itself away to the world in the past and got burned for it. because the world kept taking and taking. and now there’s war and pollution and shit and yoba/yo-yo is maybe just a teensy tiny bit angry and bitter now. but it’s ok because now they got this human from another reality to help them reclaim the pieces of itself. and maybe along the way relearn how to love the world again.  

*oh also yoba didn’t create the whole planet like the creation story claims. they’re technically an alien that came across a young planet full of life and decided to stay and help it develop. 

*main reason yo-yo made a contract with samuel is because it needs help finding/reclaiming the pieces of itself. pieces can usually be found in strong monsters empowered by the piece. this isn’t always the case though. sometimes it’s in an ancient artifact. sometimes it’s in a specific place like a temple. sometimes it’s in a person. 

*samuel doesn’t have to deal with having an existential crisis about yo-yo, since he’s from our world where yoba doesn’t even exist as a god. yo-yo claims to be the one responsible for bringing samuel over into the stardew universe, but there are holes in their story. where did yoba even find the power to do such a thing when they’re in such a weakened state? mysterious. 

*the first time yoba reveals itself to shane is kind of chaotic. it’s in the middle of the night when yo-yo suddenly appears in shane’s room, grabs his face with its little stick arms and yells, “WAKE UP!!! YOUR BOYFRIEND IS IN MORTAL PERIL!!!” shane is like, ���WHAT THE F–”     it was an act of desperation on yo-yo’s part, because samuel was in trouble and shane was the only one it could think of going to for help. essentially samuel meets something Bad in the deep mines, something that takes him out of commission and puts him in a trance state while draining his lifeforce. y’know, the classic kind of trance state where you need to figure out how to get the person back–how to snap them out of it. yo-yo tried and failed, so that’s where shane comes in. it’s the classic “love-interest-breaks-main-character-out-of-mind-control-with-sheer-power-of-love” trope. except shane does punch samuel during it. lovingly. in the face. hey it works ok.     after the chaos is over and everyone’s safe and gathered together, samuel and yo-yo explain everything to shane (well more like samuel explains everything while yo-yo wishes outloud that they had their memory erasing powers back). shane, who is canonically an atheist, learns that this talking pottymouthed jerkass apple is actually THE yoba and is just like, “yeah. this might as well happen.” and then he remains atheist because what else are you going to do when you learn that god is a talking pottymouthed jerkass apple who calls you a bitch and is also responsible for your partner having to go do dangerous shit. he and yo-yo have a rocky relationship at first to say the least. but once they both realize how much the other cares about samuel, things get a little better. 

*yeah, yoba may be a bitch and they may be angry and they may be bitter, but they really do care, even if they try to convince themselves otherwise. even though so much got taken from it, it still cares about humans and dwarves and shadow people and everything else on the planet. and when it eventually comes down to it, yoba will step up to protect what it loves, even if it means losing everything again. 

SHANE FINCH: 

*this post was technically supposed to just be about my farmer and yo-yo’s lore and stuff, but i gotta give some personal headcanons i have about shane… like for instance his last name is “finch.” because i thought the bird theme was cute. he’s 29 years old, bi, and half asian, half white (in our world that asian half is korean). i’m not being specific because i don’t know if korea even exists in the stardew world, since all we know in the game is that there’s a “ferngill republic” and a “gotoro empire.” i was thinking of just headcanoning that stardew’s planet is essentially the same as earth. so like most of the same countries/nations exist except the history diverged a bit along the way, leading to the ferngill republic and gotoro empire. OK SORRY for the tangent—back on topic.

*so shane is a trans man who started transitioning back in high school. he had two best friends who were very supportive and really helped him on his journey to figure himself out. those two friends were like family to him. it was good that he had this support because his parents were always pretty shitty and shane transitioning just made them act even shittier. the only good family member of shane’s is marnie, who was supportive, but she lived far away, was busy, AND wasn’t on good terms with her sister (shane’s mom), so shane didn’t get to see her much. 

*the moment shane became a legal adult, he got away from his parents, finding a place with his two best friends and moving in together. oh and his friends’ names were rosa and heath. should’ve probably mentioned that earlier oops.     shane, rosa, and heath go to the same college together, suffer student loans, graduate, etc. haven’t thought of what shane would get a degree in yet—most likely something “generic” because he’s unsure of what he wants to do himself (i feel u bby). 

*ok so rosa and heath were dating since high school, but they were so comfortable with shane and vice versa that things never got that awkward living together. however when rosa and heath got married (“yoba, FINALLY,” shane would say), shane felt like it was time to find his own place, much to the devastation of his bffs. the apartment ended up close to where rosa and heath lived of course—the couple made sure of it (“stop backseating my apartment hunting!” “MAKE US”). 

*rosa and heath get pregnant and have a healthy baby girl that they name jasmine. i headcanon jas as black (from heath’s side) and portuguese (rosa’s side). everyone is thrilled about the baby. shane was immediately offered godfather role and he happily accepted. jas was the cutest baby ever and he adored her. he babysat jas all the time. 

*jas was 4 years old when rosa and heath tragically passed away in a car accident. they were coming home from a business dinner when they lost control of their car on some black ice and slid into oncoming traffic. shane was babysitting jas when he got the call. in the span of one cold winter night, shane and jas’s world shattered. 

*rosa and heath didn’t have any reliable relatives either. those relatives only came to take the money and belongings. shane was the only one jas had, so he adopted her. he tried his best to pick up the pieces. he really did. he lasted for a year trying to raise a kid on his own with the salary of a dead-end job, but he knew the situation wasn’t good with the money and how much his mental health was spiraling. he knew he and jas were in dire need of more support (“jas deserves better than this”). so he turned to the one person he had left to rely on: his aunty marnie. and that’s how shane and jas ended up in pelican town.

*shane’s joja jacket was actually originally rosa’s. rosa worked as an accountant for joja and would get free promotional items all the time from the company. the jacket was one of the only things she actually ended up using because “it’s pretty comfy for being joja bs.” she would wear it all the time, much to her more fashion-conscious husband’s chagrin (yet he would patch up any holes she’d get in it anyway). after rosa died, shane kept her jacket. there were a lot of memories in it. 

~~~

ok that’s it for now. if anyone actually read all that, thank you for even wasting your time to process my ramblings. i’m sorry it’s so fucking long like jfc.

*who is mr. qi?

[klaus-littlestwolf]

The Lost Boys Sexy Mate Headcanon

David:

•He is the hardest to get to know in the group, the most closed off despite the fact that he talks to people the most as the ‘Leader’ of the group

•David is a Dom if ever there was one, he needs to be in control at all times

•He would never let anyone know it but he craves his mates attention desperately, and if you make the mistake of pulling away from him before he’s ready for you to move you will regret it

•He doesn’t always have to be touching you like some of his brothers with their mate but he does always need to be able to see you. If he looks back from scoping out the packs next meal and can’t immediately see you then he is instantly ready to slaughter whoever has stolen you from him!

•David loves blindfolding you when you play together. The trust you give him makes him the happiest vampire in the world, the faith that you have in him to not know whether he is going to run a feather over your flesh or his own fangs is incredibly arousing to him

•He’s a bit too controlling for you in the beginning but you adapt to it quickly, moving into the cave with your mate about a week after meeting him and turning that next weekend as David wasn’t okay with allowing his precious mate to be at risk a moment longer than she had to and you were completely fine with that

Dwayne:

•Dwayne is quite a bit like David when it comes to his mate, he doesn’t always have to be touching you but he does always have to see you however he finds the need to touch you quickly growing on him as you take to hanging off of him most of the time

•He shocked you when you found out how much of a cuddler he was when you’re alone or in the cave, his brothers sometimes like to tease him for how ‘clingy’ he is when you’re snuggled up on the couch but you just flip them off and run your fingers through his hair. He loves laying his head on your chest and wrapping his arms around your waist, holding you as firmly as he could…honestly he just loves laying his face between your breasts

•He wasn’t a fan of toys until he caught you with your vibrator one night and from then on his favorite thing was taking you apart with it before stretching you out on his cock until you’re a boneless puddle unable to move

•Dwayne isn’t very jealous but it doesn’t mean he’s not possessive as fuck, he knows you would never be unfaithful but he believes only he should ever be allowed to touch you

•He quickly took to taking pictures of you. He ‘bought’ a Polaroid so that he could take pictures of you any time you were doing something he thought was ‘cute’ which was all the time. Dwayne knew that once you turned he would never be able to take pictures of you again so he wanted all he could get now. He convinced you to allow him to take some sexy pictures of you as well, he has many of you under him with your hair over the pillows and your breasts either in a lacy bra or exposed for his pleasure. His favorite picture however was an image of you in a black lacy bra and panty set, straddling his bike on the cliff by their cave at sunset that he carry’s in his wallet everywhere he goes

•2 weeks was all it took for him to get you to come and live with him in the cave, drinking his blood that very same night and joining their eternal family

Marko:

•Marko often pulls you as close as he can, loving it when you wrapped yourself around him like a spider monkey

•He is a very jealous mate, glaring at every male that so much as looked at you sideways and often getting into fights on the boardwalk with Surf Nazis as well as just normal tourists, once even punching a 12 year old boy in the nose for looking at your ass

•One thing that Marko loves is fucking outside, and he loves fucking you in the rain. It started as something you did to be out of the cave so his brothers couldn’t bother or tease you, and it was one of his favorite memories, pinning you to the tree, your clothes soaking through and heavy as he brushed your drenched hair out of your face and saw your cute little smile, pulling you into a passionate kiss and spending the next hour and a half playing with you in the storm as the waves crashed so loudly you could barely hear each other

•Marko shocked you a bit by not allowing his brothers to touch you at all for quite some time after you got together. He knew they wouldn’t hurt you but he was so possessive and protective of you that he didn’t like the idea of anyone but him touching a single inch of you

•It was on your 1 month anniversary that you moved into the cave and you lived there with him for several months before turning and joining the pack, Marko not being as pushy for you to turn and wanting you to experience all your human things before turning so you wouldn’t regret it

Paul:

•Paul had his hands on you 110% of the time, constantly needing skin on skin contact with you whenever possible

•He was the most touchy and attentive of the vampires, and while he’s always been flirty and a bit of a man-whore, that completely changed when he found his mate

•Paul loves finding new ways to pleasure you, and tease you as well, which is why he was always open to trying new things. His favorite thing that he has discovered with you is your fluffy tail plug which he got you matching ears for to be his little pet

•Paul doesn’t mind fucking you in front of his brothers. He actively tries to cover you as much as he can from their sight but for the most part he would rather put up with them being in the room rather than not touch you at all

•You found out quickly in the relationship that he had never gone down on a girl before when he admitted it to you, desperate to have you wrap your legs around his head but not wanting to hurt you. You thought he was sweet, and honestly his embarrassment was adorable. He had never had a real committed relationship before (only fucking girls before feeding on them and never having a relationship before being turned at 18 by David and Marko) and now that he did he wanted to give you everything and make you scream like a good boyfriend is supposed to (and not how he normally makes women scream)

•He ended up being extremely good with his mouth and eating his mate out became one of his all time favorite things to do to you, loving the way your legs shook around his head and you soaked his face

•Paul was a fantastic mate and after moving into the cave a few weeks into your relationship you offered to turn so that you could be with him forever and Paul was beyond happy about it as he had tried so hard not to pressure you into becoming a vampire for him but he knew as you drank his blood that night that you had the rest of eternity together

Lost Boys Masterlist

[zukosbangtan]

"zutara shippers are just a bunch of girls who self insert as katara bc they have a crush on zuko" okay... and? while this is not the case for most zutara shippers i still don't see the drag in it even if it was.

literally who cares. it's a fictional ship between two fictional characters from a fictional world. they do not exist. it's a tv series. a tv series made for entertainment. and oh how DARE girls even try to derive joy from a tv series meant to entertain!?!!

it's really annoying how kat@@ng shippers use this argument as a drag but i honestly also don't like how some zutara shippers seem to get weirdly hostile and defensive abt it and feel the need to fight tooth and nail to deny it. cause again, there's nothing wrong with it! there are no rules to shipping !! (i mean. in my opinion there are a few rules but they don't apply here so we move lol)

it's literally just misogyny. shipping is supposed to be fun but i forgot that girls, especially young girls, aren't allowed to have fun.

i know that a lot of kat@@ng shippers won't see anything wrong with this "drag" but i do wish that at least zutara shippers would stop acting like it's something girls should be shamed for and embarrassed abt.

also how could being a "self insert ship" be a drag when it comes to zutara but not to kata@ng when kata@ng is literally only canon bc it's brykes version of a self insert ship. and so the same thing they try to drag female zutara shippers for.

most of us first watched avatar when we were kids. zuko is a handsome and strong (and angsty) teenaged firebender prince; it's not surprising that a lot of young watchers had a crush on him. katara is a beautiful smart and powerful young waterbender that a lot of young girls growing up related and looked up to; it's also not surprising that a lot of girls imagined being her (at least i did lol). and if some of them decided to ship zutara based on that then so fucking what?? what's so wrong about that??

cause you're trying to tell me that it's weird and wrong when young girls insert themselves into a ship between two teenagers but it's totally fine and normal when bryke (two grown ass men) make a 12 year old boy their self insert character and make him date a 14 year old girl? like..that's not weird to yall?? i need you to be so fr.

again, it's just pure misogyny. it's like there's no space in which girls and women won't be ridiculed and shamed for even the most innocent things we do. they'll always try to deprive us from any type of joy and fun, even if it harms literally no one (well in this case, harms no one but the idea that katara could never possibly even think abt wanting anything else for herself than brykes idea of a self insert ship. cause remember, self inserting is only bad when girls do it. but when it's grown men? no problem!!).

the atla fandom is sadly no exception from that. i genuinely couldn't care less what or who ppl ship but it's just so sad to see how much misogyny is directed at specifically female zutara shippers. and what makes it even more fucked up is that it's not only from non-zutara shippers but from bryke themselves.

there's so many things that are wrong within this fandom but young girls imagining that they're katara and shipping themselves with zuko is definitely not one of those things and should be the least of our problems. like this is just such a dumb argument against zutara and such a silly thing to get mad abt in generel. like. why do u gaf. genuinely. why is this something that makes u mad. please be normal. and being misogynistic is definitely not normal.

well okay these are quite a lot of words for me just wanting to say that hi if you're a girl that ships zutara bc u like to insert yourself into the ship that's totally fine pls don't listen to those weirdos and i hope u have a lot of fun 👍👍

okay actually while we're at it it doesn't matter why you ship zutara; if it's bc you like their bond or their dynamic, bc you like the development of their relationship during the series, bc you're a fan of the enemies to lover trope, bc you're a fan of the betrayal trope, bc you like the red and blue symbolic of their ship, bc you just like how they physically look together, or bc you have a crush on zuko and/or katara and like to insert yourself into the ship or just bc it's a random monday evening and you just felt like shipping it or whaaaatsoever it doesn't matter okay none of these reasons are superior over other reasons and none of them are dumb reasons as long as you have FUN.

let's strive to make this a kinder and fun place for everyone but especially for girls and women please. thank you👍

[delulu-with-wandanat]

Ayy put in ur request mfs😩🫶

(or questions. or thoughts lol)

Request are CLOSE😚

(for now pookiebears, pls do share ur brainrots if u want too!)

Also this shit is 18+

(Out the door if u is underage. Aight now below here is just things me like and don’t like, as well as masterlist)

Here’s thing me like and no like👌

Me likey:

Wandanat (Romantic)

I’m open to NSFW but like not explicit?? (Idk how to explain myself, I’m just not very good at smut😅 But yes you can request that!)

Wanda x Reader (Romantic/Platonic)

Natasha x Reader (Strictly Platonic)

I know there’s not a lot of Masculine!Reader so if you want those just specify it 👍 (Just keep in mind of the previous bullet)

Natasha x Sibling!Reader is my personal fave.

Wandanat x Child!Reader is also 🫶🫶

Me no like:

Wandanat x Reader (Sorry guys, unless it’s platonic yes I can do that)

Natasha x Reader (Again sorry guys, I see her as a mother/sister figure)

(now onto the good stuff)

✨MASTERLIST✨

- Romanoff-Maximoff Family -

Soccer Moms Wandanat

Shopping for School Supplies

Goes on a vacation ('Vacation Dad' Nat x 'Memory of a Dory' Wanda) Part 1 | Part 2

- Wandanat (my beloveds) -

Fatal Attraction Natasha gets hurt during a mission with Wanda, and Wanda for some reason found herself more attracted to Nat. Yes, in her state on injury.

Frog Debacles Wanda and Natasha's child is an animal lover. They have the tendency to bring home whatever stray they find, today was no different. They brought home a damn frog.

Shape of You Wanda's exploring the extent of her powers and can't help but tease Nat with it. And Natasha... well, Natasha discovers something new about herself.

Money must be funny, in a rich girl's world. Natasha works at a beach club, and Wanda is the daughter of the owner. Let's just say, summer wasn't the only thing that's hot that day.

Sweater Weather Wanda and Natasha are friends, maybe even more. People love a classic jock and cheerleader trope. However when Natasha finds out that Wanda's little groupie had been bullying her little sister, it puts a strain on their relationship. Will Wanda be able to redeem herself?

'Chubby MILF' Wanda x 'Beefcake' Romanoff Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |HC

The Adventure of Wanda's (questionable) Hairdos Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 Wanda has an obsession with her changing hairstyles, and Natasha is a supportive girlfriend.

Queen of Westview High ('Mean Girl' Wanda x 'Nerd' Tasha) Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Last

Stuck in Our Universe (Crackfic that got extended... very much) Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 (Holyshit this was long-)

Two Worlds Apart ('Corrupted' Wanda x 'Earth 77' Natasha) Part 1 | Part 2

Love and Immortality ('Witchy' Wanda x 'Vampire' Natasha) Part 1 | Part 2

- Wanda Maximoff x Reader -

Tainted Past Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 Years have passed since Westview and Wanda finally has the chance to settle down and live the normal she had always yearned for. However, that comes with a challenge as many were still wary of her. Along the way she met a young man in his early 20s, whom took pity on the witch despite all odds.

Mockingbird America Chavez gave Wanda what she wanted, Wanda sees the love of her life again from another universe. However, her lover's variant already build a life without her...

International Affair (Wanda Maximoff x InternationalStudent!Reader) Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Last

Hopelessly in Love (HS au) (Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff x Reader) Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Last

- Natasha Romanoff x Reader -

Alternative Proposition Struggling to take care her 5 year old daughter, Y/n took out a loan from the mob to start a small business in hopes that it would resolve their financial struggles. But small businesses takes time to flourish, which Y/n doesn't have and ends up biting her in the ass... or did it?

[pineappleciders]

hi guys. i don't like to make posts like this but i figure i'd just want to clear some things up

first things first, i do not support OMOCAT and please get off my page if you do.

i know a lot of people are going to tell me that it was a long time ago. and i know. i know that people change and i do have faith that OMOCAT doesn't do the stuff she did anymore, but that isn't my problem

if you aren't aware of the extent of what she's said, it wasn't just the shota shirt. here are some ss of deleted tweets from 2012-2014.

if you're wondering, she has made an apology about the shirt she made about a year after she released it, stating that the definition had changed since then and she felt it was no longer appropriate

basically her whole thing was that it didn't mean that to her, and that it just meant little boy

and, to be quite honest, in this situation i don't care what 'shota' means, because either way it doesn't make her look any better. making a shirt with a picture of an anime boy with the words 'little boy' on it isn't much of an improvement.

and what's worse is her tweets. again, 'little boy underwear' doesn't sound any better than 'shota underwear'. in her tweet as of nov 2013, BEFORE the shirt was removed, she made the tweet that said,

'what does shota mean' 'uh'

i feel this pretty much implies that she knows in a lot of circumstances it has some sort of sexual connotation to it. and the tweet about people flipping their shit when they see her shota underwear???

a grown woman tweeting about 'how she doesn't like *all* little boys but thinking about her 3rd grade crush makes her flustered* is just straight out pedophilia, u cannot deny that this is weird af

i dislike cancel culture. i don't think people should have their lives ruined for making mistakes, but this was not a mistake. saying 'omori is hot wow good shota' about a 12 year old character she created isn't really something u can just bounce back from imo

the thing about the underwear and her apology only being about the shirt is the most gross to me. i think it's apparent that even if she didn't think shota is an erotic word, she obviously knew that other people felt it was and these were her responses.

i'm just posting all of this because i think people seriously underestimate the situation,, and i also don't want anyone thinking i support her in any way. i love OMORI with all of my heart and it rlly sucks to see the creator of it say this kind of shit

again, i know it was a long time ago but the thing is she never apologized for the tweets (as far as i'm aware) and only for the shirt, which ngl was kind of half-assed considering she only said 'i didn't know what it meant' (either way, in what world is selling a shirt that says 'little boy' on it reasonable?)

i don't want to reach, but i think her treatment of HERO in the game is also questionable. the adult women in the game fawn over him and SWEETHEART literally preys on him??? and the way the slime girls treat the boys is questionable imo. i wouldn't say this about a normal game but considering OMOCATs history this is strange to me.

anyways ill wrap this up by saying please do not interact if you support omocat!!

[pom-seedss]

Okay. So.

I am 99.999~% sure it is my neck. Whether it is a weird nerve pinch or a blood vessel or what idk, but after more testing of various things at home it is almost certainly the culprit for the temperature disregulation. TL;DR at the end.

I finally got my doctor's office to take it seriously by writing a letter mentioning that I have at many points wanted to die and did not want to get *actively* suicidal again after over five years without having been actively suicidal. Since it it in writing that their patient was potentially going to become suicidal about them not doing anything.... they decided it was appropriate to actually do something. What I found out is despite my doctor's office being a multi-doctor clinic who supposedly works together, my primary doctor didn't even confer with her colleagues about the situation before going with the "I can't think of anything" and leaving it with me.

Because the on-call doctor decided to actually *listen* to what I was saying and is sending me for a neck xray with possibility of going for further testing (ex: MRI) if things turn out normal there. He is also sending me for some endocrine testing, cortisol testing and some kind of 24 our urine analysis test as a just in case it's these weird things measure. He literally just took the few things that were on the top of his head from maybe 20 minutes looking in to my situation, so I am still pretty mad at my primary doctor for the negligent attitude she'd taken towards this.

And yes, they are probably only acting to cover their asses because I mentioned not wanting to be actively suicidal about all of this again. But that wasn't an idle threat, I was starting to teeter towards that feeling and even Bean was worried and if there was literally no end to this we actually discussed MAiD at one point - not as an immediate thing, but as a vague possibility because of how fucking awful it was and the prospect of living with that forever was *that* fucking daunting.

My doctor was trying to pass it off as 'a weird stress response' despite the only major stressor in my life at that point being...the hot cold bullshit itself. And yes, stress made it worse, but that's true of *any* condition under the sun.

I finally got to go back in to my old chiropractor of 12+ years who knows how to take care of my body and almost instantly she made me go from feral gremlin with a boiling head to human being again. It just sucks because it is taxing on my body to travel 1.5hrs to get that treatment.

Granted, one appointment isn't going to solve this problem and what I really need is long-term stability, which is what I am going to go back to physiotherapy for as soon as I am cleared by my gallbladder surgeon to be able to do more active things.

Along with going back to massage therapy, whenever I can actually book that *rolls eyes at everyone under the sun having no availability*, I hope that I can get this at least under control. TL;DR 1. Doctor's office finally decided to check some basic things out, like a neck xray, after I mentioned I was on the edge of becoming suicidal about being left to my own devices about this. 2. It is almost certainly my neck causing the issue. 3. I am trying to get back in to regular treatment in various places to help heal and stabilize the neck. 4. I am not well yet, the worst of it can come back at any time, but I am more hopeful for the future. Holy fuck this has been scary and exhausting and it will take awhile for me to be okay with things but damn.... it's...something. Maybe this will just be a very bad blip in my life after all.

[s0fter-sin]

what up it's been 12 years and i'm still pissed there was no consequence to dean being in constant survival mode and fighting 24/7 in purgatory

what do you mean he didn't become a god at hand to hand combat? what do you mean he could still be jumped by random ass demons?

he was - at best - in a constant in-between state meaning he didn't get hungry or tired but that also means he didn’t sleep for a year and was constantly being hunted by hundreds of thousands of monsters that want to eat him specifically, while actively searching for cas

OR he was in a completely normal state meaning he was constantly fighting starvation and exhaustion while all of that was still happening!! it's not like there's much to scavenge in monster heaven!! he would’ve been on the verge of dying for a year!!!

then he comes back and he's just exactly the same? the same level of fighting skill he's always had? if not slightly worse for some reason?? what do you mean he couldn't kill anything he came across with his eyes closed when it's what he's been doing EVERY DAY FOR A YEAR???

it's always been one of the flaws of a show running for so long that after like s6 they never seemed to be getting better? they still got the shit kicked out of them by demons and ghosts and what have you and instead of finding obscure rituals they just got A Better Gun™️

both sam and dean are the peak of what hunters can be; they've been trained to hunt and kill things bigger and stronger than them since they were children, so what do you mean they still get the shit kicked out of them so often? was it just to show how strong monsters are? that even with their level of experience and skill, they're still outmatched?

(or do you just need a way to keep up the tension cough cough what who said that)

but you can't have dean who's been trained to be an elite soldier Since He Was Four Years Old go into a 360 combat scenario for an entire year - a good chunk of which he was completely by himself - then say he didn't improve his combat skills At All

and not even just combat, his senses would've been off the charts!! there was nothing but ambient forest noise and growling, his hearing would've gotten so sharp, it was darker so his night vision would ve been insane and he should've been able to feel a monster coming a mile away after constantly being on guard

post purgatory dean had the opportunity to be a completely different beast to anything we'd ever seen before, to be a completely different kind of traumatised from all of his other trauma

hell broke him but purgatory should've broken and rebuilt him into something Terrifying

[lemon-koii]

❛ ،其 ::Twisted wonderland family hcs

My headcanons and thoughts on what the twst cast's family is like

●°●°●°●

Pt 2(Savanahclaw), Pt 3(Octavinelle & Scarabia), Pt 4(Pomefiore & Ignihyde), Pt 5(Diasomnia)

𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒃𝒚𝒖𝒍

𝑅𝑖𝑑𝑑𝑙𝑒 𝑅𝑜𝑠𝑒ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑠

His parents are divorced sa thats why they dont get along well. His mother got full custody of him while his dad only got 2 hour visits every saturday

He has an little sister named who is a year younger than him. He doesnt know that he has a younger sister since his parents never told him and they got divorced after his sister was born a few months. Plus she lives with their father. She doesnt know about it too

His mother had him when she was 25 years old and his father was 27 years old

When he was a child he had mixed feelings about his father visiting him every once a week. His father is a "good" man. He's much more calm, less controlling and always have a pleasant smile on his face. But whenever he visits, it doesnt go Riddle's way of spending time with his father but, his mother and father arguing and screaming for 2 hours straight. Sometimes, his father only stays for 45 minutes or an hour

Now that his older, there's still a tiny hope in him to talk to his father. But he's scared since he was never close to him and if he tells his mother about the call

He once saw a picture of a baby with pure white hair in his mothers drawer and she got really mad and screamed at him so he never bought up the topic ever again. Although, he still wonders about it

𝑇𝑟𝑒𝑦 𝐶𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑟

He has 3 younger brothers a 1 younger sister. The first 2 are twins who are 4 years younger than him, the 3rd brother is 5 years younger and his sister is 7 years younger

Trey and his sister are the only ones in the family with magic. He got his UM at 12 years old and his sister got hers at 10 years old

His parents got married when they were 20 and meet eachother in their teens. Had Trey at the age of 28

His father is quite a care free and easy going but strict when needed type of dad.

After when Riddles mom went to their bakery shop to confront the parents, Trey's dad didnt got mad at him but told him to always stay in line and never stand out so that no trouble would get in his way again

The bakery have been past down frim the mothers side from Trey's great-grandmother, reasoning its popularity

The last name "Clover" came from his mother since she never changed her last name when she got married since she wanted to keep her family name

In general, the Clovers are a pretty normal family(except for Trey im sorry) so there not much to say about them

𝐶𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝐷𝑖𝑎𝑚𝑜𝑛𝑑

(We already know that he has two sisters and his father is a banker. As far as i know, he hasn't mentioned anything about his mother)

His mother used to be a model before she gave birth to his older sister. Now that she's jobless and finacially dependant on her husband. Which is spending them on clothes, products, alcohols, make up, designers and other things

Both his sisters go to a rich ass private school(NRC is better than theirs) that focuses more on sports

His sisters are slightly jealous that Cater has magic. Although they never really did anything about it except dumping their chores on him and telling him to use his UM to complete it all

His sisters always calls him, asking him how school is then proceds to ask about Vil. So does his mother

His father is a cold, patient, no-nonsence and well mannered type of person, although he's rarely home. If he is, he's either working on his office or sleeping. So Cater rarely spends time with him

There are 6 animals in their household since each of them have their own pets

Cater has 2 ferrets, named Cizy and Yena

His mother has a pomeranian, both his sisters have a British shorthair cat and his fathers has a Gecko

𝐷𝑒𝑢𝑐𝑒 𝑆𝑝𝑎𝑑𝑒

Since he was raised by his mom alone, im taking it that she gave birth to him when she was 18 years old from a night with her boyfriend(Deuces dad)

Both his parents used to be in gangs. His father was well respected and known in the delinquent community while his mother wasnt that much known but was still respected

They quited when they found out that they will be having a child(Deuce)

His father died before Deuce was born due to old delinquent enemies wanting revenge as they thought that he had gotten weak from his new domestic life

His fathers death affected his mother so much that Deuce's grandmother was the one who took care of Deuce when he was only 4 months old

Even after this, his mom stayed strong for Deuce and doesnt want gim to follow her's or his fathers footsteps. Which failed(ifykyk)

His mom was always busy when he was a child to provide for the both of them, so she would always hire a babysitter and occationaly, call Deuce's grandmother. Even so, she would still try as much as she can to spend time with him

But due to Duece growing up not being always spending time with his moma and his absent father, it led him to his delinquent life

𝐴𝑐𝑒 𝑇𝑟𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑜𝑙𝑎

His family is suprisingly normal???

His mom is an accountant and his dad is a sea-man

While his brother is a profecional basketball player

His brother is 21 years old

Him and his brother are half siblings since his mother already had his older brother before she remarried and then Ace was born

Even if their only half related, they still treat eachother like real brother. His older bro would beat up anyone commenting anything bad about their family

His mom is a Filipina and his dad is british so Ace his half and while his brother is full Filipino

His mom is a loving and up to date with trends type of mom while his dad is...moody.

As much as Ace loves his dad, he cant help but feel his guard up whenever he's in the same room as him.

Ace doesnt like if to much good things happen to much since i gets his hopes up of having a good day but he knows that sooner or later that day that something bad will happen

Like, when he was joking and talking about basketball with his father. At first it was light hearted and jokes, then it turned to him getting lectured. Them as a family having a movie night turning into a silent fight between his parents.

Empty promises and him remembering peoples footsteps

Ace has trust issues due to this but doesnt show it. And he's good at acting about it too since no one ever noticed this

Ace and his cousins from his moms side get along really well unlike with his cousins from his dads side

He had a jejemon phase because of his brother and cousins. He would fake puke every time they mention anything about it

His mother was 27 when she met Ace's father who was 29 and his brother was 2 years old

Lived in the Philippines until he was 9 years old and they moved to the queendom of roses

●°●°●°●

Apologies if there are any typos since english isnt my first language

(▪︎Pretend that Philippines is an existing country in Twst)

[dukeofdelirium]

What do u think of the theory mj couldve been autistic? Ive heard it would explain his want to experience his childhood and other behavior like his soft spoken voice.

I don’t think we should be attempting to armchair diagnose a dead man with anything. Michael was a very abused individual… he continuously said this was part of the reason he enjoyed more simple, “childish” things as an adult. He wasn’t just an abused person, he was also the main attraction when it came to the musical family of the Jackson’s. As such, he faced things his siblings did not and it affected him more than them.

Michael had a soft voice because that’s just how he was. I don’t see how autism would give someone a soft voice, and this is coming from a man who is neurodivergent himself. And Michael could speak lower than that, btw. A lot of ppl assume he spoke very gently (aside from it just being his personality) to protect his vocal chords, and while there isn’t proof one way or another, this would at least make sense.

Michael was a genius in many ways, and was obviously a very intelligent man. He was born with gifts that seem almost impossible for someone to have all at once. He was in every way, a prodigy.

We can’t sit and try to differentiate Michael’s behavior when he isn’t even alive, let alone the fact that he rarely gave interviews to begin with. He did not enjoy the press, or speaking much to the public. There’s also the fact that Michael was unlike any other human that’s ever lived… his life was extraordinary. So how can we say for sure, when his behavior could also have very easily been due to the highly unusual circumstances of his life?

MJ loved having simple innocent fun. He liked playing games, liked having water balloon fights, liked pulling innocent pranks, etc. I don’t find this to be proof of autism nor do I find it unusual for so many reasons.

1) He was famous as a 5 year old. And he never got a break from that fame. He became the most famous human that has ever walked the earth. He simply never had the opportunity to be normal, to be a child, to have fun in that way.

2) He was very badly abused throughout his life. His father beat him, he was teased constantly to the point he wouldn’t look in mirrors, he was being shown actual pornography on TV during interviews when he was 12 years old…. He was performing in strip clubs, prostitutes and such would make sexual passes at him, many women took advantage of him and Madonna herself sexually harassed and abused him on more than one occasion. Michael was deathly afraid of his father to the point he was literally vomiting whenever his dad would visit him… he was well into his 20’s at the time. He also would be in the room or sitting right outside the door when his older brothers would be hooking up with girls, so he was again being exposed to very mature things far too young. This isn’t getting into the abuse he suffered at the hands of the media and public.

Now tell me… if that were you, do you think you would be “normal” to the public afterwards?

3) He was constantly having to work his ass off. He never got breaks from dealing with complicated things like business deals, tour, rehearsals etc.

So having silly fun for him was relieving in a lot of ways. Michael also cared so much for children and was a very strong advocate against child abuse. Which is a huge reason he was constantly around children and doing things for children. Michael was raised to do charity work like that. He was a devout JW for a lot of his life, and believed very strongly in the Bible verse: “whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest among me in the kingdom of Heaven.”

I don’t think it matters why Michael was the way he was. At the end of the day, he was an incredible person who used his talents to give us art that we can enjoy forever. He saved millions of lives across the world through his humanitarian efforts and he did it all without being asked and without receiving as much as a thank you. And I think we should celebrate that rather than focus on rumors or on creating new ones. He loved children, and all people, and unlike other artists he truly brought the world together and taught us to love and to have hope.

Who cares why? We should be grateful it even existed at all.

[gladioluslemon]

THE LITTLE HOPE GANG AT

A TRAMPOLINE PARK HEADCANNON 💜

(credited to @kindheartedgummybears cuz some of the headcon are based of/yoink from them!!)

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

This all happened when Andrew, Daniel, and Taylor all plan to convince John to let them go to the local trampoline park

Them: this is for creative writing i swear!! 😳😳

John: how the hell is this for creative writing-

They end up going cuz Andrew the favorite and wanted it 😭

Angela and John would be like the parent sitting down while the kiddo (who are 22, 20, and 18) go jump around

Angela would be recording them while John, eating pizza, is just sitting there making fun of them

Angela: look at them!! *holding her phone like a mom*

John: werid *snacking on pizza*

Daniel would be the “showoff”

The kid who doing the most

Doing flips off the walls and cartwheels

Or like balancing off the balance bored which no henstion (but then get his ass beat by Taylor in jousting

Honorable mention: Daniel attempting a obstacle course 😭

Andrew would be the normal guy who jump and lay on the trampoline

until a little kid jump on top of him

just watching Daniel and Taylor share the same brain cell

And honestly just regretting letting this happen

Taylor on the other hand

Taylor would totally be the kid who break a body part of her (her nose)

know how? Dodgeball.

Taylor would 100% be a competitive in dodgeball

She competing against a bunch of 12 year old

like Taylor honey you’re 22 😭

don’t even get me started on the arcade!!

Out of the three, Taylor would get the most ticket (she convinced Daniel to give her all of his)

She would buy a random funko pop they would have for her collection (another headcon for another day 😉)

Andrew would have a lot of ticket but buy a pencil or a eraser topper

Daniel would use the rest of Andrew tickets cuz Taylor 😑

He would buy either a nerf gun or those cheesy/obnoxious led light for his dorm (again.. another headcon for another day)

Like “Gamer” or “Get nood” with noodles

Yall know the motorcycle racing thing? and you know how one person would do it right but the other keep fucking crashing into everything

That Taylor and Daniel 100%

Andrew would totally love the flappy bird or the keyboard panic games or the alien shooting one those are totally his styles

Don’t even get started on the air hockey also!!

That is just a whole shit show

Those craw machines and Daniel get a plushy for Taylor because she suck at it (who good at claw machines??)

Taylor and Daniel would get multiple flavor of the icey drink while Andrew get basic red

Or if they get regular fountain drinks

Taylor would get Fanta, Daniel would get sprite and Andrew would get Pepsi 

Andrew seem like a Pepsi guy

Angela and John would likely get Diet Coke

They seem like Diet Coke people to me

They would totally end up getting ice cream after like a big happy family 🤗

Taylor get cookie and cream, Daniel get mint, Andrew get vanilla, Angela get chocolate and John get coffee

fight me all you like

Daniel suggested coming back for his birthday

I mean… It IS his birthday soon on the 29th 😉

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

My lord that took forever!! this came up after I went to launch for my nephew birthday yesterday so here you go!!

+ Taylor, Daniel and Andrew in most of these headcon (yes in that order) :

[fallingawkwardly]

what's your favourite thing about each of the main chymicalia characters? and do you have a favourite child? :'D

Yan, you're one of, like, four people who've finished the game, I want to know what you think about the characters, and who's your favourite! Thank you for asking, though...

Anna is incapable of moderation, and I love that for her. She is trying to do everything, all the time. She is feeling every emotion to the absolute maximum, hurtling from one end of the scale to the other every few seconds. She is so clearly 3 to 6 months away from the hugest mid-twenties burn-out you've ever seen in your life, but out of the ashes of her political disillusion, she's gonna rebuild herself as one of the most bad-ass lesbian anarchists in history, and the world is not ready. She should totally get that motorbike.

Bern. Oh, Bern. Love to see a classic, dour Yorkshireman. Love to see a 32-year-old guy who's clinging to the dour Yorkshireman archetype like it's the last plank from the shipwreck of his youthful dreams, because at least then people won't expect him to be cheerful about it. Love to see him say things like, "Mustn't grumble" through gritted teeth. Love to see his thousand-yard stare, as he mentally takes someone apart at the joints for telling him, "It Gets Better!!!" Love to see occasional glimpses of fragments of his soul he thinks he's drowned, rising and falling behind his eyes, like half-dead tropical fish. This metaphor is getting out of hand, but as a literature graduate, Bern would appreciate the thematic effort.

My favourite thing about Nimone might be the dumb little gimmick of her clip-on sunglasses. Because at first you think she's all cool and goth and mysterious, but then she flicks them up to reveal her thick lenses and deer-in-the-headlights expression, and it's like... oh! She's just a huge nerd! Who is so totally out of her depth, once the conversation gets beyond the narrow radius of her comfort zone. It's okay, Nim. It's over, they've gone. You can go back inside your van, now and spend the next 48 hours recovering from the social and sensory hell of standing in full sunlight, talking to a stranger for five minutes.

Voss has one of my favourite traits in a character, which is "humour as defence mechanism". Aw yeah, babe, deflect that personal question with an exaggerated lie for comic effect. Self-deprecate to defuse criticism in advance, that's so hot. Never say how you really feel about anything, keep the bit running instead. Commit to it harder than you've done to any job, school, friendship or relationship, which is definitely not* why you've been constantly crashing and burning on them your entire life. It's okay, it's fine. You can just keep getting new ones, with your charming personality and hilarious witticisms!

(*This is true. It's only 20% of why. The other 80% would be the undiagnosed ADHD, dyslexia and dyscalculia.)

Last character I'm gonna talk about is the player character, who you can name yourself, but I refer to as the Alchemist. You can mould their personality through gameplay via raising or lowering 12 character trait-type stats, but their past life and current situation is set in stone, and... oh, wow. This is bad. This is... really bad. Your character has the kind of life story that stops conversations dead and makes people immediately treat you like a leper, because no one really has a social script for talking normally about it. So maybe it's for the best that you can't talk about it - because you're literally cursed not to. Literally. Yeah, it's cartoonish, honestly.

The result, though, is perhaps my favourite thing about the Alchemist. Chymicalia is, structurally speaking, a helping-customers game. It's supposed to be the customers who have the problems, and the calm, bartender-style protagonist who has the tools to fix them, help them, save them, all that stuff. But here, it's... complicated. Because as the game proceeds, it becomes more and more obvious that the person here who REALLY needs help, is you. But... there's no mechanic for that! You can't use alchemy on yourself. You can't tell anyone about your problems. For a million overlapping reasons, you can't ask for help. You don't even believe it's possible for you to be helped. And in a game where you spend all your time trying to needle other people into spilling all their personal problems to you, and trying (successfully or unsuccessfully) to fix them, that's delicious.

Finally, you can't ask me to have a favourite child. That's illegal. So I'll pick my favourite non-major character: Yaz, the Worst Librarian. I have been, and still am, a librarian. Yaz is where I put all my evil fantasies, the things librarians aren't supposed to say or do, like let people steal things, or have Incorrect Opinions about the value of books. Plus, she's the funniest character in the game, and unlike Voss, she's not even trying.

[PLEASE ASK ME MORE QUESTIONS ABOUT MY GAME, ANY QUESTIONS!]