#that shouldve been something he held over his head for the rest of their lives bc it is unforgivable

[s0fter-sin]

what up it's been 12 years and i'm still pissed there was no consequence to dean being in constant survival mode and fighting 24/7 in purgatory

what do you mean he didn't become a god at hand to hand combat? what do you mean he could still be jumped by random ass demons?

he was - at best - in a constant in-between state meaning he didn't get hungry or tired but that also means he didn’t sleep for a year and was constantly being hunted by hundreds of thousands of monsters that want to eat him specifically, while actively searching for cas

OR he was in a completely normal state meaning he was constantly fighting starvation and exhaustion while all of that was still happening!! it's not like there's much to scavenge in monster heaven!! he would’ve been on the verge of dying for a year!!!

then he comes back and he's just exactly the same? the same level of fighting skill he's always had? if not slightly worse for some reason?? what do you mean he couldn't kill anything he came across with his eyes closed when it's what he's been doing EVERY DAY FOR A YEAR???

it's always been one of the flaws of a show running for so long that after like s6 they never seemed to be getting better? they still got the shit kicked out of them by demons and ghosts and what have you and instead of finding obscure rituals they just got A Better Gun™️

both sam and dean are the peak of what hunters can be; they've been trained to hunt and kill things bigger and stronger than them since they were children, so what do you mean they still get the shit kicked out of them so often? was it just to show how strong monsters are? that even with their level of experience and skill, they're still outmatched?

(or do you just need a way to keep up the tension cough cough what who said that)

but you can't have dean who's been trained to be an elite soldier Since He Was Four Years Old go into a 360 combat scenario for an entire year - a good chunk of which he was completely by himself - then say he didn't improve his combat skills At All

and not even just combat, his senses would've been off the charts!! there was nothing but ambient forest noise and growling, his hearing would've gotten so sharp, it was darker so his night vision would ve been insane and he should've been able to feel a monster coming a mile away after constantly being on guard

post purgatory dean had the opportunity to be a completely different beast to anything we'd ever seen before, to be a completely different kind of traumatised from all of his other trauma

hell broke him but purgatory should've broken and rebuilt him into something Terrifying

[fandomxo00]

Pillowtalk with Logan/Hugh 💕✨

note: he shouldve just stayed naked for this whole scene, thanks for requesting anon!! working on requests today same may not be long but i wanna get some out

Logan held you in the crook of his arm, on the side of his hip, his other hand resting on your stomach. Going over the rolls on the side of your bed, feeling your skin against him with a heavy touch that soothed something deep inside of you. Your heart had finally calmed down from the sex you'd been having, your chest was covered in marks made by Logan. His hand moved down to the swell of your belly, a smile on his face as he thought his son. He wondered if he'd look more like you or him, Logan was hoping he'd look like you.

"You're so beautiful." Logan breathed, leaning in to kiss your jaw, his hand skimming up your ribs and massaging as your breasts as his mouth moves over the bruises on your neck. Your hand came up to his thick hair, threading through the brown locks and tugging him in closer. "Y/n." He grunted, moving to your ear, his nose rubbing against your neck and coming to your ear. "Love you more than anything I've ever known, you and this baby, you are my world. I couldn't be here if it weren't for you." You felt goosebumps rise over your neck as you pull his head to yours and smash your lips together.

"I love you, Logan." You mumbled against his lips, the indent of his smile indenting on your cheeks.

Until you got pregnant, Logan didn't think he was going to ever have children. He also didn't think he would get married; it just wasn't in the cards for him. Though he wanted to spend as much time as he could with you, for as long as he could. But when you got pregnant it was like he was given a chance. It was his excuse to step away from the action, take you away from the danger and create a home with you.

You didn't think Logan was going to be forever, but only because he'd never commit. He was upset when you first told him about the pregnancy, he couldn't imagine himself as a father figure. But then you found him, you'd been crying and you just walked over to him and asked for a hug. Logan wrapped you in his arms as he held you to his chest, that's when it flipped inside of him. He never wanted to make you cry like this, he realized that he was in love with you, that somewhere deep down having a child filled this unfulfilled need.

When he had met Kayla all of those years ago, he thought that was his time. Logan was going to settle down, marry his girl and having a family. Living out a mundane life, but it shattered when he was confronted with the truth. It hurt even more when he regained his memory of her. He just wished it was different. But he didn't want to feel that pain again, so he never gave himself fully. "Lo." You whispered, his mouth had moved back to your neck, cuddling into the crook.

"Yeah princess?" He rasped.

You flushed as you said, "Keep touching me please." A low groan came out of Logan's throat as his hand moved to grasp your hips, his touch a little rougher than before.

"Such a good girl, asking so nicely." Logan hummed in your ear before he brought his face up to start kissing you again. "My girl."

"Yours." You whispered, as his hand came over your core. "God I want your cock so bad."

"Yeah, where baby?" He grunted, his hand moving your slick against your folds.

"You know where, Lo."

"Yeah? Sure you don't want my tongue? My fingers." His middle finger dipping into your soaked cunt, as you let out a shaky moan.

"Want your cock in me."

"Well alright bub." He grinned.

tags: @ohtobemare @jessjessmarvelandhp @chronicallybubbly @delicateholland @bubblegumholland

[heyitsyn]

Mess Up

TimeTraveler!Son x Haikyuu!!

a/n: lmao im really sorry about this :’( this is just a brain dump and something i thought of while i was watching the stage play and i was thinking about it last night until i fell asleep

p.s. your son’s name is natsu in this one and hes an oc so dont be confused as to who this guy is 😂

summary: your son accidentally stumbles through time and the only way he can go back is if his mother and father get together. the only problem? he doesnt know who his father is

he,,,, messed up

that was clear the moment he woke up to a supposed bicycle accident in early morning when it shouldve been a car accident at the dead of night

lets take a flashback shall we

natsu came home after volleyball practice around 8 at night and he stumbled through the front door where he could smell the delicious food that you were cooking

‘ma! tadaima!’

he shouted and you peeked from the hallway with your blue apron and ladle and a close-eyed grin

‘okaeri, baby!’

his slippers padded across the wooden floors to go to the kitchen and watch as you stirred the miso soup

‘how was practice, dumpling?’

omg i would totally call my future kids that though

he shrugged, even though you couldnt see him, and went to the fridge to grab a bottled water before taking a sip

‘inter-high is coming up so captain’s been making us practice longer’

he answered then went to jump on the counter beside the stove so you could see him

he turned silent as he inspected your features and how youthful you still looked despite going through so many stressful times and hardships of raising your son alone

but he was really wondering what was exactly your purpose of being here since you rarely cooked for him due to being busy at work and therefore coming home late

‘ma, why are you here early?’

you noticeably stopped for a second before smiling, eyes shifting from the pot to him

‘i,,, have something to talk about with you’

natsu blinked then leaned against the wall and crossed his arms

‘is it something bad? but youre cooking my favorite so it must be something good. then again, it might be something bad but you want to be on my good side so youre bribing me with-’

‘natsu’

you softly called out to him and he stopped

you turned off the stove and shuffled to the side so you could stand in between his legs

no words were said as a sad look passed your eyes and you cupped his face, looking at him

‘youve grown so much, natsu. ma is sorry that she wasnt here to watch you grow. can you forgive me?’

natsu let out a confused sound and he placed his hands on top of yours from his face then quirked an eyebrow

‘ma, whats going on?’

he slowly asked

you continued to look through every feature of your son and grimaced slightly as his father’s stood out much more than you thought

‘come. lets eat while we talk’

dinner was tense

it was more of the tension coming from you and natsu being so worried and confused that he couldnt even eat his favorite

suddenly, he slammed his chopsticks to the table, fed up with the silence and genuinely worried by your behavior

‘ma, tell me whats wrong’

you winced and swallowed before shakingly placing your own utensils down and looking at a stain on the table from when he was 5 and accidentally spilled dye from his tye-dye activity

‘natsu, i,,,’

you drifted off but he gestured for you to continue

‘first off,,, i want you to know that i love you and that i only want what’s best for you. second,,, i hope you will go through with this because i,,, dont want you to bear this,,, this grudge for the rest of your life’

‘am i adopted?’

he demanded but you looked at him in shock

‘what? no! we literally have the same hair color and eyes, dumpling!’

then he let out a relieved sigh

‘thats the worst thing i thought of so i feel better now. come on, hit me’

you chuckled but went back to talking

‘your father,,, wants to meet you’

nope, that was actually the worst thing he heard

‘father? what, father?’

he couldnt stop the venom that dripped from his words and you flinched because you knew he would act like this

‘we bumped into each other at the airport,,,, he told me about,,, wanting to meet,, you’

you mumbled, now concentrating at your laced fingers

‘well, you can tell him to fck off because the feeling’s not mutual’

natsu growled then continued shoveling down his rice but you reached out and softly placed a hand on his arm and sent him a pleading look

‘darling, i-,,, i dont want to do this either. but this hatred for him-your anger- i dont want you to live with this! this might not show now but it will affect you in the future with a-a future family! he will drag you down but if you just--- just talk to him once! just once-’

natsu banged a fist on the table and you gasped at the sudden sound

‘HE WANTED YOU TO KILL ME’

he shouted, anger and rage reeking from his spot across you

‘HE LEFT YOU TO FEND FOR YOURSELF BECAUSE HE WAS TOO MUCH OF A DAMN COWARD TO OWN UP TO A CHILD HE HELPED MAKE. OH SO WHAT- ALL BECAUSE HE JUST WANTED TO SCREW? A FUN TIME THEN THROW YOU-US- AWAY? NAH, MA, WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO MEET SOMEONE WHO NEVER WANTED ME IN THE FIRST PLACE?’

you gulped because right now, you were able to see the similarity to his father

‘he just wants to see you-to talk to you’

‘BUT WHAT ABOUT ME? I DONT WANT TO SEE HIS FCKING FACE BECAUSE IF I DO, I MIGHT PLUMMET HIM TO THE GROUND’

‘natsu, please stop yelling at me’

you pleaded and he stared at you angrily but turned his gaze back to the chicken bites

‘every thought of him makes me angry so if i see him, i will lose every control i have. hes nothing but a stranger to me-wait, no, hes like dirt that deserves nothing but bad luck to come his way. its either he wanted me or cant have me. and he chose wrong so hes going to have live with it for the rest of his life and pretend i dont even exist. and thats that’

you ran your hands on your face then closed your eyes

‘natsu, you dont understand, we-- we were children! i was still a student! we didnt know,, we didnt know anything about babies! i-i feel like shite because i brought upon this rage in you towards him, your father! i want to make things right! to make peace!’

‘DO YOU THINK I NEVER SAW THE TIMES YOU SAT ON THIS SAME FCKING TABLE, LOOKING AT THE BANK ACCOUNT AND CRYING BECAUSE WE WOULDNT HAVE ENOUGH FOR FOOD TOMORROW? OR-OR WHEN YOU BEGGED-BEGGED- YOUR BOSS FOR MORE SHIFTS SO YOU COULD MAINTAIN A ROOF OVER OUR HEAD? YOU THINK I DONT SEE THAT SHITE?! BECAUSE I DO! I SEE IT AND IT STILL GIVES ME NIGHTMARES TO THIS DAY BECAUSE I COULDNT DO ANYTHING TO HELP YOU! I JUST SAT THERE AND LET YOU SUFFER IN SECRET BECAUSE I WAS JUST A CHILD! AND DO YOU KNOW WHO’S AT FAULT WITH ALL OF THIS?! HIM! HES THE REASON WHY YOU SHED EVERY BLOOD, EVERY SWEAT, AND EVERY TEAR! ITS BECAUSE OF HIM I NEVER SEE YOU BECAUSE YOURE BUSTING YOUR ASS AT WORK FOR ME! ITS BECAUSE OF HIM THAT I PLAY LIKE MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT SO I CAN BE SCOUTED AND EARN MONEY FOR US IN THE FUTURE! HIM! ALL HIM!’

angry tears were falling down his face and you stood up to hold him but he shot up

‘natsu-baby-please calm-’

‘WHO DOES THAT TO A CHILD’

his voice cracked and he hiccuped

‘IT DIGUSTS ME THAT I SHARE THE SAME BLOOD AS HIM AND I AM MADE WITH 50% OF HIM! AND I SEE THAT LOOK IN YOUR EYES BECAUSE I REMIND YOU OF HIM, DONT I? I HATE THAT! HE DID THAT TO YOU!’

you held on to him and tried to tell him to calm down because you knew how distructive he could be

‘I HATE HIM. AND I CANT BELIEVE YOURE TRYING TO CONVINCE ME TO SEE HIM. HOW COULD YOU’

maybe it mustve been the stress from midterms and the competitions but his heart was hammering and he could see nothing but red and feel nothing else but anger running through his veins

‘no, dumpling, youre misunderstanding because i-’

but he swatted your hand away, eyes staring at his shoes

‘i need to get away right now. just- i’ll be at katsuki’s house. dinner was good so thanks’

he mumbled and rushed to the hallway, picking up his gym bag and quickly slipping on his shoes

you ran to the door and held on to him

‘natsu we can talk this out! please! dont go! just stay-’

he shut his eyes to calm himself down before turning and giving you a soft kiss on your forehead

‘ill be back tomorrow. just let me go blow off some steam, kay, ma?’

but he didnt even give you an answer because he was already out the door

--

the walk from his apartment complex to katsuki’s house should’ve only taken nearly 10 minutes but he was so pre-occupied and distracted that he ended up missing the turns and ended up in an unfamiliar street

based on his surroundings, he was in the city but he remained his gaze on his shoes, just walking and walking, not stopping

this caused him to miss the stoplight and he was the only person who continued walking, the shouts and yells from the pedestrians falling deaf on his ears 

but it finally opened up with a loud honking and a bright light that made him freeze in shock until it collided with him, sending him flying and falling unconscious

---

natsu groaned, not because of the pain but because of the bright light

‘oh god, i died and im going to the light’

he mumbled but a frantic shout made his eyes fully open up

‘NO DONT GO TO THE LIGHT! OH GOD! I JUST KILLED SOMEONE!’

natsu turned to the direction of the voice and he jumped then rolled over to get away but indeed, the pain from the collision stopped him

‘ugh’

he groaned and winced

‘hey, hey, you okay?’

the high-pitched voice asked and natsu raised his head to see the boy with orange hair kneeled down in front of him and hands hovering over him

‘i feel,,, ugh’

natsu sniffed and the boy helped him sit up so he could fully look around

‘where am i?’

he asked and the boy shuffled to kneel down beside him

‘japan. sendai. oh, im hinata shoyo by the way! so sorry i hit you with my bike!’

but natsu’s jaw dropped

‘hinata,,, shoyo?’

his eyes widened and he completely forgot about the pain as he stood on his feet, pointing at the tangerine

‘OLYMPICS!’

he shouted and he was getting scared, eyes drifting to everywhere and pacing in circles

‘did i,,,, no, that doesnt happen. damn izuku wouldnt shut up about doctor who. its not possible, just not! right?!’

hinata was now panicked and thought he really messed up the guy in the head because the h/c boy was now walking in circles, murmuring angrily, and face switching expressions every millisecond

‘oh my god, i need to take you to the hospital! i messed you up!’

hinata frantically grabbed his phone but natsu jumped and grabbed the device

‘no. no, its fine. i just-,,,, i dont remember anything’

natsu played and hinata’s eyes got even wider

‘OH MY GOD I REALLY DID SOMETHING WORSE!’

but natsu placed his hands on his idol’s shoulders to calm him down

‘no hospital, no needles, no medics. just,,, call your emergency contact or something’

it was quite funny that the victim had to console the cause of the accident but hinata nonetheless complied and hit the call button

‘your mom?’

natsu asked but hinata shook his head

‘no. my team manager, l/n y/n. she’d know what to do’

but natsu’s brain exploded

‘l/n,,,, y/n?’

my ma?

oh god i really did mess up

this is going to be a whole mess and i can already feel it but yanno what? imma just go with the flow and go through with your guys’ thoughts and ideas so in a way, you can control (??) the story?? idk i really dont know what im doing but i just needed to put this into writing bc ive been thinking about it since i woke up. also, do you think i should write this in a headcanons way or normal writing way?

[ma-lark-ey]

Nick Close had never been a very fantastic child. That much was very obvious. Granted, most of the dumb and illegal shit they did was for their fathers attention (however rarely that option actually worked), but it was still dumb and illegal shit.

Tonight was not one of those dumb and illegal nights, however; tonight was still a night Glenn Close could never find out about. Nick prayed he'd never find out about.

Nick had always been closed off from their father. How couldn't they be? When they were little, it was always Nick and Momma at home, while Daddy was on tour or doing shows. Glenn only started being home once in awhile when Mom died. And yes, Nick calls him Glenn. Glenn was never... He was never 'Dad.'

And this, this was certainly one of the things Nick kept tightly closed off from their father. That thing being one of the biggest secrets Nick may ever keep; their gender.

Nick didn't *mind* to be a 'he,' don't get them wrong. Some days, they really enjoyed being a 'he.' But today? Today... Nick was a she. And she couldn't deny that. Some days she felt so fucking confident in her body, like she could throw on a baggy t-shirt and slightly too-big pants with a beanie and fight god. Others, her body felt like someone else's and she wanted to rip her skin off and start over. Dress like those beautiful alternative women she saw on TikTok. With the demonias, fishnets, skirts, ripped up shirts, messy hair. God, some days she didn't know if she wanted to be them, or be with them.

Tonight, she definitely wanted to be them.

She had done up her makeup in the most extravagant way she knew how, eyeliner to the gods. Fishnets under a faux-leather, checkered print pencil skirt she found thrifting with Grant a few days ago. She had one a torn up old t-shirt she'd cut into a croptop and not to mention her Docs. She felt like she could fight god with her chain belts and dramatic jewelry.

Nick knows Glenn would never care if he knew his 'son' sometimes felt more like his daughter, but she wasn't ready to give him that kind of trust. Grant? Grant got that kind of trust. Henry got that kind of trust. The twins got that kind of trust. But not Glenn. Glenn hasn't proved he'd deserved that yet.

And maybe Nick didn't want to take the time to explain why Grant sometimes called her Nickie beyond "Its just a nickname, Glenn."

And she was okay with that. She knew that she wasn't ready. Maybe she'd never be 'ready,' and Glenn wasnt in her life enough for it to matter.

...

Why'd the front door just open? Why is Nick hearing a car lock? Why is the front door opening? Glenn's not supposed to be home from tour until tomorrow. And here Nick is, in the living room. Looking like a pretty well passing woman. She had learned plenty of tricks over her last two years of presenting feminine some days. The lanky, stickman build the had was the one thing Glenn had given to her that she was thankful for.

But the genetics of Glenn Close that were gifted to his child were not the problem at hand. The problem at hand is that *Glenn's home.*

Glenn's home. Glenn's home, and Nick is not in her Glenn Mode. She's vulnerable. Vulnerable to a lot of questions she doesn't want to answer tonight. Doesn't want to have to explain where all this women's clothing came from, nor why she's dressed as one. It can't pass as drag, but she's obviously not in drag makeup. Fuck. Fuck it all. Fuck her life and her shitty decision making skills. Fuck Glenn for never communicating his plans. And fuck the stunned way he's staring at her now.

The awkwardness of the room was palpable at this point. Nick felt like a deer in headlights. Nick felt like melting into the floor and disappearing from the world. Nick felt like her whole world was about to collapse in on itself. What if Glenn hated her, what if he didn't want her to act like this or be this person, what if-

"Well, don't you look nice. Got a date or something, kid?"

Thats... That's not what Glenn was supposed to say. That's not what he's supposed to say! He's supposed to be upset or revolted or-

"I- I uh..." No. No don't cry. Fuck. Why are you crying, Nicholas? Nicole? Fuck what even if your name right now?

Glenn's here. It should be Nicholas. That's your name when you're a boy. But its a girl day. You want to be Nicole today. Glenn is here, and you're Nicole right now. And Glenn is here. And you're Nicole. And Glenn-

She heard a bag drop on the ground and footsteps come toward her. She stepped back and tried hide behind her arms. No words. She can't speak.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck.

She remembers the time she went to school in feminine clothes and a couple of guys almost jumped her, before Lark pulled a knife on them and got them both suspended.

Hands grab onto her shoulders, a gentle hold. She can feel the calluses on Glenn's fingers from his guitar. When was the last time he held her?

Her knees feel like jello. She remembers when she started posting on her second TikTok, open about her gender and pronouns because she didn't have to keep up a cisgender face when her dad didn't have the account. And how transphobes sent her deaththreats until she blocked all those words from her comments and the DMs got disabled.

She's a few inches taller than Glenn in her platform Docs. Which she realizes when he pulls her into a gentle hug. She feels makeup running on her face. And she's crying. Why is she crying?

She remembers being ten years old standing at moms grave, standing next to Glenn. Just after the burial. It was the first time she'd seen him cry.

Her chin's on his shoulder now, his arms around her upper torso and holding her against him. She realizes she's shaking. That he's just holding her. He's holding her. Daddy's home.. He's giving her a hug...

She remembers the last time Glenn had hugged her. At Mom's funeral. She was sobbing at her grave, and so was Dad. He pulled her into him and held her so tight. So tight she thought he'd crush her. But he just held, like she was the entire world. Like if he let go he'd loose her to. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, hid her face in the mix of long hair and his suit jacket. He felt like her whole world in that moment, too.

Nickie brings herself back to what's happening. Glenn's holding her, her arms are awkward resting on his back, He's clutching her by the shoulders. She remembers these hugs. The hugs that he used to give her every time he left and came home. The ones he gives where every second of it is embued with love. It felt like that now.

She could tell he loved her. But those words felt like lies in her head.

Lies. Lies. Lies. So many lies. So so many lies.

"I'll be home by nine, Nick." It was a lie, Glenn didn't come home for three more days. "I promise I'll be home on your birthday." He wasn't. "I'll be there." He wasn't. "I'll make it, promise." He didn't. Everytime. Everytime, where Glenn shouldve been, it was Mom. And when Mom died, it was Henry. Or Ron. Or Darryl.

But he's here. Right now. And he's holding her. It doesn't make it okay, it doesn't excuse it. But he's holding her. Her knees go weak, and she crumbles. He crumbles with her.

She sobs, he doesn't force her to say anything. She doesn't return his hug, he doesn't expect her to.

"You're supposed to be mad." Nick mumbled after she doesnt remember how long. Glenn gives a light chuckle and adjusts his grip on her.

"And why would I be?" He asked, not protesting as Nick shoved him off and shuffled back a few inches. It felt weird to be so close to him after sixteens years of so much distance.

"Why wouldn't you be?" She spat, crossing her arms and staring at the ground. "Nick's fucked up again. That's my whole brand! Being a total and absolute fuck up! The disappointment! The druggy, the- the... The mistake." She felt more hot tears behind her eyes. She could feel Glenn staring at her in concern.

"Nick, you are not a fuck up. Or a mistake. Or whatever else. Nick, you're my baby, and I-"

"Then why did you leave? If you're gonna pull that bullshit, and say you love me no matter what, and that I'm your little girl, and that- that you wanted me from the very beginning and wouldn't give me up, why did you leave? Why dont you care now? When you come home, and woopsie! Your son's dressed up like some goth chicken. Why are you acting like everythings fine!? Everything is NOT fine, Glenn!" She hit the floor with her hands and growled in frustration. It wasn't fine.

Glenn stared down and took a deep breath. Then he sighed. "Yeah, I can't blame you on that one, kiddo. Alright, full disclosure, Nick. I already- I knew. I knew about the pronouns, and the name. I knew. Henry told me."

"H- Henry... Did what?"

"He told me. Soon as you told him. He called me that night, let me know what you had said. We have a rule in our group, we've had the rules since Grant came out. If one of the kids comes out as anything, you tell the other dads. Especially if its a name and pronouns thing. Cause, we agreed that since well, we were all kind of one bug cluster fuck of parents to each others kids, it was better if everyone knew who was what. So we didn't fuck it up."

"So you have a rule to out kids to their parents? That's-"

"No! Not any kids. Its just you, Terry, Grant, and the twins. Just you five. Because, here's the thing, Nick- Nickie? Whatever. Us dads? We arent- we're new to the whole queer scene. Its not as normal for us to just fliparoo what pronouns and names we call people as it is for you guys. So, we would practice to each other. When you told Henry you liked being called Nickie, he came to us and essentially said, 'I'm gonna say Nickie to you guys as often as i fucking can do I don't end up deadnaming.' "

Glenn took Nick's hand into his and held it tight. Nick still felt like punching Henry in the fucking face for outting her to Glenn.

"You know that I love you, Nick." Her body went rigid at that. And she looked uo at him, glaring as hard as should mister with how fucking teary eyed she was.

"Do I? Do I know that you love me, Glenn?" And his face fell. It was like she just sucked his soul out of him. Good. That should be one hell of a wake up call.

"Nick, of course I love you. What would ever make you think I didn't love you?" Nick but her lip, thinking over her words before she said them. She thought on a lot of things.

"You left. My mom died, and you left. My *mother* was dead and you went back to touring in a matter of weeks. My mother was dead, and I was ten years old. And I was home, by myself, for weeks. Glenn, I was alone for months. Sure, there the nanny. But that wasn't Mom or Dad. I needed my parents. I needed my dad. I needed my dad to give me a hug, promise me it'd be okay. That we were okay. And he fucking left. He walked out that door, didn't come back for months, only called every three weeks. Missed birthdays, holidays, soccer games, and whatever the fuck else. Why on gods green earth would I think that you loved me when you fucking abandoned me, Glenn? Why? Would you think I loved you if I fucked off to god knows where after being home for just a couple days? Huh? If when I found out you'd been up in drug city with your mates and getting caught by cops doing a bunch of stupid shit, all you got was a slap on the wrist and a phonecall that last three minutes?"

Glenn stared at the ground for a long time. He didn't speak. And he pulled her back into a hug, practically dragged her across that distance to hold her again. Hold her like the whole world depended on Glenn never letting go again. Like if he let go everything would come crashing down, like Nick was the entire fucking world and he just wanted to protect her. He held her like he had when Mom died.

"God, Morgan... He's just like you." He mumbled, clutching Nick so tight she couldn't breath. She didn't care he used the wrong pronouns, she didn't care he'd barely even addressed the elephant in the room, she didn't care her heel was digging painfully into the back of her other leg. Her dad was here. He was holding her. He was making sure she knew he loved her. Dad finally came home.

Glenn let out a painful sob into Nick's shoulder, he said something. Nick thinks it was an apology, but between the sniffles and the hiccups and layers of clothing, its impossible to tell. Glenn pulled her up into his lap, held her like he would when she was five or six. Her head on his shoulder, his arms around her middle as he sat horizontal across his lap. Her legs were too long to curl up like they used to, so they sat awkwardly half-stretched across the floor. It was nostalgic in a way. It felt Glenn was just realizing how many years he'd wasted. How much time with his child he had lost.

"I'm sorry, Nick. Im- I didn't realize. I'm so fucking sorry, Nick." He was still crying. Crying more than Nick had ever seen him cry. She could hear the self-hatred and the regret in his voice. She reached an arm around his neck and pulled him that much closer.

"Just don't leave again... Please, Dad." Nick doesn't remember that last time she had called him 'Dad.' But, it felt right in that moment. It hasn't felt right in a long long time.

[wildtorres-a]

𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥.

WHAT? —  after a night of their usual antics, drew and lia wake up in bed together.

WHEN? —   saturday night, march 21st.

TRIGGERS? —  very long smut, alcohol mentions + use, drug mentions + use.

FEATURING —  lia rosenburg ( @rosenburg-lia )

A deep sigh left Amelias mouth as she settled herself opposite Drew in the jaccuzi, she was grateful for the connection she had with the boy. If she had a chaotic plan she knew that he was the best person to call, almost never saying no to whatever crazy idea she had planned. "Today has been interesting, Im glad men are simple creatures and are still attracted to boobs," She joked as she took a hit of her blunt, her head tilting slightly as her eyes trained on Drews, "Im glad we did this, a sort of escape in a way," She spoke with a small shrug as a smirk tugged to her lips, "Plus the room is not bad, the bed looks like a cloud. Im proud of you Torres," a quick wink sent his way with a laugh.

it'd been a long day, even longer when the brunette teen thought back on the fight he had with his step mother that morning. there was the frequent disappointment, threats to take away all social devices and temporary isolation other than school that would turn permanent if he didn’t get his act together and begin focusing on the right things, and the mention of ‘stupidity’ that left a bitter taste in his mouth along with a clenched jaw. it ended with her leaving his room and beginning to get ready for second shift, when drew grabbed his keys and made his way right out of the house, slamming the door despite her protests. which of course, leads him to where he is now. sitting back against the jets, as he lays his head upwards on the edge of the jacuzzi, puffing out smoke from his last inhale, the drug already taking it’s effect as lia sits across from him. it’d been a mere ten minutes ago when the last family, a mother and her two sons, had left the pool room leaving the two miscreant teenagers to their own devices. which of course was when the drugs and alcohol had been brought out, thankfully the two wouldn’t have to worry about anyone interrupting them, having already given the receptionist an extra $50 to let them stay after hours. drew almost thought it wouldn’t work, this being one of the more prestigious hotels in the city, but you’d be surprised what you could get at the right price. he grabs the bottle of ciroc, takes a swig, before placing the bottle back on the cement. chuckles at her words, “i doubt there will come a day where men will not be attracted to those” his eyes linger on the subject of the matter for only a second, before they shift back onto her gaze. he’s playing with fire and he knows it, but is sure she’ll chalk it up to their usual banter. “i’m more than glad, i couldn’t be in a better state of mind than i am right now,” he offers, with a smile. glad that lia had taken him up on his offer to get into something entertaining.  

it’s the first time in a while he'd heard anybody say anything along the lines of being proud of him, even if it's being said in a joking manner. he feels almost pathetic for basking in the feeling more than he should. more than what’s necessary. ”hey, i should be thanking you, i couldn’t have done it without you,” he praises with a sly smirk. doesn’t feel the guilt from pickpocketing the man a few hours earlier, doesn’t think he'd miss the $300 that much, given his expensive looking suit and polished dress shoes to match. sticks his hand out for the blunt as he passes her the bottle , ”plus i heard this place has good ass breakfast, if we’re even up in time for it” doesn’t admit that he wishes the night could never end, not wanting to think of the repercussions of his actions when they wake up in the morning. ”wanna make things more interesting?“ he asks, the dim lighting giving her a glow, as he looks her over.

The way their family treated them was something that bonded the two almost from the jump. Being held to a higher standard than was necessary and fighting back even if not on purpose. Her parents expecting more out of her given her older sisters life, but she wasnt right in their eyes. It seemed like no matter how much she took the time to mold herself into the image they had of her, it wasnt working. They would find something new to hone in on and make her change. Eventually just learning to love herself and the person she was. And she had been like that for a while now, but to most it seemed he had just randomly changed in a way. But Lia knew this side of Drew for most of the time they had been in eachothers lives, it wasnt a shock to see him acting the way he was and the things he was doing. She had grown to enjoy this side, they got into plenty of trouble over the years because of it. Something about their energy coming together, maybe it was sharing a birthday, or maybe there was something else, but it was always somehow chaotic. Tonight was a prime example of them scheming purely for a good time. She wasnt one to shy away from using her body to get what she wanted, nor flirting with older men for money. But when Drew suggested the plan she couldnt help the devious smirk that had tugged to her lips. A very similar one to the smirk that was on her face as she watched Drews gaze fall, a wink sent his way when their gazes met, "They come in quite handy at times, so I hope they dont," She chuckled lightly as she leaned her elbows back on the cement behind her, taking a drag off the blunt one more time. His smile being returned as she exhaled. "Well we cant have a sad Torres, then no one has any fun," She spoke with a teasing pout as she passed him the blunt, taking the bottle off his hands, immediately pressing the opening to her mouth and tilting her head back.

"I do have quite the way with men dont I," she spoke with a small shrug, a laugh bubbling out as she relaxed back into her place, slightly closer to Drew so it was easier for them to pass back and forth. "But thats why we're partners in this, couldnt do half of my crazy antics without you D," She chuckled lightly, thinking on the countless stupid shit the two had gotten into together. Petty theft was one of the more minor on the list, well at least to her. Others would think they were crazy if they only knew. Her grin widened as her eyes lit up at the thought of breakfast, "That sounds amazing right now," A small moan falling from her as she thought about the food, "We shouldve brought munchies out," A small pout falling to her lips before a smirk took its place, an eyebrow raise sent towards the boy, "what have you concocted in that pretty little head of yours?" Her eyes finding his as she they traced his face. 

perhaps it's the liquor. maybe the weed. he’s not entirely sure, but his eyes can’t help scan over her body clad in the tight baby blue bikini. he’s always found lia attractive, as well as any guy that's ever come across her he supposes, with an enthralling personality to match. but he knows there’s a limit to how far they can go, even if he is tempted to go over and beyond the unspoken boundaries as they sit half naked in the otherwise vacant pool room. he lets the jets calm him, listens to the sound the water makes as it laps up against the edges, hoping it takes the thoughts away. he takes the blunt from her hand, pressing it to his lips, and inhaling it. he blows the air out a good ten seconds later, eyes on her as she talks. “i’d say you definitely have them wrapped around your finger,” he smirks, as she comes closer to him. “not that i can blame them, you’re beautiful” he leaves it at that, as he gives her a cheshire smile. “you know, you’re the only one i don't feel like a total idiot around” and now he knows the alcohol is talking, but he can’t find himself to disagree with the words. ”i think i seen a little store up by the reception desk, we can get some when we get out of here” he offers, finding her pout to be cute. he takes another hit of the blunt, inhales it, holds it in before he leans over and gently grabs lia by the shoulders, leans in until their lips are only centimeters apart, and blows the smoke into her mouth. “i’ve always wanted to do that,” he confesses when it’s over, lingering there only for a moment before pulling back, but not fully moving away. “twenty one questions, if you’re up for it,” he answers, “only if you don’t answer a question, you take a shot” he shrugs, doubting that any shots will be taken between them and their daring personalities.

She always felt a rush when she was around Drew, something about his demeanor just had her fixated at times. He was a good looking guy, one of the best in the school, there was no denying. His personality making him all that more intoxicating to the girls around the halls. But due to the history he had with a certain person in her life there were limits. Granted she may have put them on the friendship, out of respect, but there was something about the atmosphere. Maybe it was the feeling of the jets against her skin, or the way his eyes raked against her, but she felt something shift. Finding herself watching the way Drew hit the blunt, admiring the way his lips looked as he exhaled. Her eyes clouding over slightly with more than just alcohol and marijuana. "Its a talent of mine," She spoke, arching a perfectly done brow, "Only beautiful?" She spoke her tone laced with something more than just their usual banter. "Its because we thrive off chaos, especially when we're together," She chuckled lightly, gasping lightly as she felt Drews hands pull her in. Her eyes meeting his as she inhaled the smoke, exhaling as a small smirk pulled at her lips. "Shouldve done it sooner," She spoke, her mouth working faster than her brain in her crossfaded state. "Im up for anything, you know that," She chuckled, "Although Id much rather just take shots for fun," A small shrug, "Ask away cutie," She spoke leaning her elbow on the side of the jacuzzi, resting her head on her palm as she looked at him with an almost believable innocent look on her face

there’s a chuckle that leaves moist lips at her comment, as his eyes meet hers, “and gorgeous, and sexy” he eyes her lips right after the word’s said. he knows it's wrong, to be mindlessly flirting with his ex girlfriend’s cousin, the same girl he considered his first love, but nothing in the moment feels wrong about it. “but i’m sure you have enough guys and girls telling you that” he smirks. listens to her speak, and is grateful to have her around, even if it just amid the chaos. he hears her comment, doesn’t give a response. knows it’s not necessary. they’ve crossed the line tonight. it’s in their stares, longing and want, and now that it’s here, he wonders how long they’ve been holding it in. how long they’ve been secretly waiting for the other to slip up and make a move. a wrong move, but a move nonetheless. and he does know that. knows that she’s down for the ride anytime, and is happy to accompany him, bad decisions and all. they’re probably bad for each other, no voice of reason to guide the other, but it doesn’t stop the brunette male from inching closer to her, tone no higher than a whisper. “how long have you wanted to kiss me?” and now, he knows there’s no going back.

Lia couldnt help bringing her bottom lip in between her teeth a Drews words, something about his tone telling her everything changed. "I may have been once or twice, but it sounds so nice coming from your mouth," somewhere in the back of her mind a voice was telling her to stop while she still could. that he was off limits because of her cousin, who would never forgive her. but she knew there had always been more to their relationship than the mindless flirting, she had thought about it once or twice. in more detail than she would care to admit to anyone. but finding herself in this moment she knew she was in for it. that there was no going back after today, they had to be on the same page. she knows she can trust drew with her life if she needed to. If at any time she wants to have an adventure she knew she could text him and hed be at her door asap. but as she found herself instinctively moving closer to the male, their gazes unwavering, she knew that it was the final straw. her hand finding itself on his thigh under the water as she moved closer, her lips brushing his as she spoke, "Months," She spoke, breaking the final wall and placing her lips on his

the lights are dim, the pool room door is locked, no distractions, no disturbances. he’s not thinking straight, he’s not thinking of anything else but how good he wants to make her feel. wants to hear how she sounds when she comes undone. the blunt is set to the side, ashed on the cement right next to the  bottle of ciroc. forgotten. “i can think of better things i can do with my mouth,” he states in a playful tone with a wink, although they both know what’s to come. the forbidden aspect of their actions making this all the more interesting. and maybe for one fleeting moment he feels bad, but he can’t help himself from wanting to reach out and feel her smooth skin. and he knows the temptation is too strong, even if it comes with consequences. he lets her start things off, lets her be in control, until he can’t hold back anymore. their lips meet in a heated kiss, and he can feel just how bad they both wanted this. it’s urgent, needy, and mind blowing all in one. his tongue jutting out atop her bottom lip for permission, as he slips his fingers into her hair. and there’s an obvious taste of weed mixed with the ciroc, but there’s also a hint of mint once you got past the others. he moves his hands down to her hips, before settling on her lower backside, and scooping her into his arms. he holds her in place under her thighs, legs wrapped around him. he feels the effect she has on him, and wonder if she does too. starts making his way to the edge of the jacuzzi, and once he sets her down on top of the cement, he wastes no time placing his lips on her neck, giving soft pecks, until he licks around, trying to find a spot that’ll make her weak in the knees.

"I cant wait for you to show me," She spoke, a captivating tone lacing her words. she knew where they were going, not wanting to bounce around the subject. she felt every bit of his statement through her body, having thought about this moment a few times in the past. having ultimately deciding he was off limits and better as a friend. she watched him with hooded eyes, her eyes darkening to almost black as she looked at him.she hesitated for a brief moment before she had decided to give in,  she would let him have her in that moment. in anyway he wanted, she was entirely his. her mind not caring about the consequences, her body craving his touch over every inch of her skin. a small squeal coming from her throat allowing herself to be pulled from her spot, her legs wrapping around his waist tightly. A light moan came from her lips as she felt just how much he wanted this, her heart pumping in excitement, as she felt a rush to her core. her arms resting around the base of his neck, fingers pulling ever so slightly. she could taste the green apple flavor almost immediately, getting a hint of the weed in the aftertaste, something within it becoming addicting to her within the brief period their lips were locked. she felt herself get placed on the cement, shifting ever so slightly, as she tilted her neck, her eyes fluttering closed as small moans fell from her lips.

he doesn’t want to think about how they’ll feel about it in the morning, wants to bask in this moment. their lust filled gazes burning into the other, touch starved, and filled with need that only the other can supply. maybe they can pin it on the alcohol, many have before, and they wouldn't be the last to make impulsive moves with the liquid in their system. he's brick hard, can feel the length against his right thigh, the discomfort it's making in his swim trunks, but isn’t focused on it. wants to make her feel good, like no other can. the moans emitting from her mouth is music to his ears. he starts to suck on her neck, switching ever so often to strokes of his tongue, and then back to sucking, leaving a few marks she’d have to hide the next few days. he pulls away, gives her a peck on the lips again, as he holds her face in both of his hands, admiring her. “you’re beautiful baby, and i’m gonna make you feel so good” he keeps his word, as he kisses down to her chest. he grabs at the bikini top, in too much of a rush to untie the pretty blue fabric, he slips it up and over her breasts. gives the right nipple a peck, and watching it harden, before flicking it with his tongue a few times, and taking it into his mouth. he then moves on to the left one, and repeats. once he feels she’s satisfied enough, he begins kissing down her tone stomach. slowly, teasing her with a smirk playing at his lips. he kisses her just below the belly button. then places his arms under her, wrapping around her thighs, pulling her closer to him and holding them open, leaving a kiss there, and a lick there, feeling the heat from her core, as he gives her a kiss through the bottoms and then blows lightly, taking pleasure in her reaction of the pressure. “you gotta tell me what you want baby,” looks into her eyes with a mischievous grin, as he continues to tease her. 

his touch was intoxicating, focusing on the way his hands felt as they roamed her body, an almost electric feeling being left in their wake. they could try to chalk tonight up to their cross faded state, to a one time deal, but something told her this was gonna be more than a one night stand. feeling the way her body reacted every little thing he did, she knew she was done for. that no matter what she was putty in his hands, he had her whenever and if ever and however he wanted her. her head was thrown back, loud whines leaving her lips as drew made his mark, having a feeling it was more than just heat of the moment, as if marking her in a way, a reminder to her what he does tonight, of how he made her feel. a small smile found its way onto her face during their intimate moment at his words, something about hearing them from his lips. turning almost shy for a second at them,  "please baby," she practically begged, slowly reaching her hand below the waters' surface, needed to feel more of him. her hand slipping below the waistline of his shorts, wrapping around his length, a small gasp leaving her lips. he was bigger than she imagined, finding herself leaning up against him, her lips brushing his ear, "i cant wait for you to fuck me baby, youre so fucking big," she purred, nibbling lightly on his earlobe as she leaned back, a small intake of breath from the feeling of the wind on her aroused nipples, getting cut off by a loud moan as drew began his play with them. her other hand coming to play with the top of his hair, tugging with her moans every so often as her eyes fluttered closed. slowly opening her hooded eyes to watch the raven haired boy as he traveled lower, her hands coming to rest on her chest. a matching smirk finding its way to her face, before her bottom lip pulled in between her teeth taking in the sight before her. a small giggle left her lips as he pulled her closer, soft gasps and light moans tumbling from her mouth from his touch.

her hand found its way into his hair again, tugging at the teasing. whines accompanying her actions with breathy moans falling as she moved closer to him, trying to get more friction where he was needed the most. her eyes finding his, a rush going straight to her core at his words, her thighs instinctively trying to close for some sensation. "i wanna know how your tongue feels baby, fucking me as you play with my clit. Make me cum with your mouth, please baby," She practically begged, wanting nothing more than to come undone under him again and again.

he’s enthralled in her at this exact moment, wants to keep that look of utter pleasure on her face, doesn’t want to forget it. and it’s then he realizes that things won’t be the same, even if they go back to their daily routine by the time the sun rises and they only have hazy recollection about what’s currently taking place. he’s never made his mark on a girl that wasn’t his current girlfriend, didn’t care to claim territory on what wasn’t rightfully his, but something in him wants her to remember this moment. wants to see her amongst the crowd at one of the next outings, and admire his work. the sensual touching, the needy look in her eyes as he places his hands on all the right spots. in this moment, he wasn’t thinking of what anybody from school would think if they saw the two right now, wasn’t thinking of the mayhem that would be tori's reaction, and he certainly wasn’t thinking of the punishment he’d definitely have to endure when he stepped foot into the household tomorrow. whatever it was, it’d be worth it. to see her wither under his touch, to hear her gasp, and moan and watch her face as she takes in all the pleasure.

it's almost as if the two are intoxicated on each other, clouded by the rush of it all. the longing to reach out and feel the other’s touch too much. her pleads only egging him on, and increasing the want he already has for her. he lets out a small deep groan as she holds him in her hand, and he leans in closer to her, kisses her shoulder, then places his face in the crook of her neck, whispers in his ear. “i’m gonna fuck you so good, i’m gonna have to carry you out of here by the time we’re done” it’s a promise he intends to keep, as he moves back to his former spot. — he appreciates the tugging, loves it actually, and smirks at her impatience. wonders how her nails will feel against his back. he considers continuing the torture, but figures she’s had enough, at least for now. it’s only seconds after she does exactly what he’s asked of her, that he gives her one last peck against the thin material, then strips her of it, smiling as she helps him by lifting her lips. he tosses it to the side, before going back to his rightful spot rested between her legs, head tilted towards heaven. he’s watched porn an abundance of times, as well as many of his own experiences, and knows exactly where she wants him to be. his tongue swipes against her entrance, feeling the juices she’s already produced. “you taste so good, and you're so wet for me” he murmurs, as he makes eye contact before making himself familiar with her clit. licking and applying as much pressure as he can, all while holding her legs open, dipping his tongue into her folds from time to time, and then going back to the clit, holding her in place. his eyes staring into hers intently, as he laps at her juices, inserting a finger and then another into her slicked folds, as his tongue continues it’s work on her pearl. “so wet,” he repeats, as he watches her. 

everything about him captivated her, each moment becoming engraved in her memory. she could almost feel the atmosphere shift in that moment, every ounce of her soul knew things had changed. knowing she wouldnt be able to just look at him in the halls, or simply sit next to him without a flash of this night playing in her head. but she didnt care, not about a single thing except him. she didnt care that when she awoke the next morning her entire world would shift, that she would lose the closest person in her life for god only knows how long. she just knew she didnt want the night, the euphoria, to end. every experience she had, every person that entered her life didnt compare to how she felt. she couldnt stop the whines that were falling from her throat, or the jolts being sent through her body from his touch. she felt good, knowing she had his entire presence, not a single thing being able to drag either one out of the moment. everything else being pushed to the back of her mind, all the little things that were on her shoulders melting off as his hands and mouth worked over her body. almost as if this was was second nature to the boy, knowing exactly what spots to hit, what got bigger reactions out of her without ever having experienced each other. 

her body shivered against him at his words, a moan falling from her lips simply at the thought of him fucking her until she barely knows her won name. "fuck me like the whore I am," her tone almost dangerous, challenging even. their gazes finding one another, a smirk pulling at her plump lips, and a wink sent his way. she watched him move in between her legs, widening ever so slightly for him. her heart pumping as she anticipated his next move, whining when he didnt listen right away, "please," she begged, her hips immediately propping themselves into the air when she felt his hands pulling at the straps of her bottoms. her eyes falling closed, a sharp hiss falling from her lips when his tounge found her slit. she had gotten wet just from seeing him topless before they got in the jacccuzi, knowing she was dripping by the time he got her bottoms off. "its all yours, all for you, whenever you want it baby," She choked out in between moans, her body arching every so often despite the hold he had on her. her eyes finding his amidst the haze, her hand tugging harder on his hair feeling his fingers slip in with ease, a loud whimper breaking from her lips. her other hand finding his shoulder, digging in ever so slightly, a breathy and almost inaudible  "Fuck me," falling from her lips 

he hadn't expected this. the scene unfolding before him. figured they’d drink and smoke, probably get a few noise complaints from their neighbors, and wake up to a trashed hotel room. maybe wreak havoc around the area. but he's sure none of that could compare to this. — once he's good and ready, meaning he feels she’s satisfied enough, dripping wet and begging for more, he removes both his mouth and fingers, then repeating her words, “all mine,”. even though they both know they don’t belong to each other, he has to admit he likes hearing the words fall from her lips. he’s sure it’s somewhere around 11 o’ clock, possibly nearing midnight. the two having entered the pool room at least an hour before. he knows although no one’s checking for them, it’s best to be out of here within a reasonable time. he doesn’t respond to her pleads. instead he slips out of the red and blue swim trunks, lets them pool around his ankles, before he hovers over her body, and pecks her lips a few times. slips his hands under her for what feels like the millionth time, lifting her petite frame, before placing her down in the water with him. “you ready baby?” he asks, wants to make sure this is still what they both want. before turning her around, placing her arms on the edge of the jacuzzi, spreading her legs, and aligning himself up with her entrance. once she gives the okay, he slips in, groaning at the pleasure he already feels. “shit,” he hisses, as he pulls out little by little, and thrusts in deep, trying to get into a steady rhythm, all the while making sure she’s comfortable. “fuck, you’re so wet and tight,” he groans out, as his thrusts become more rapid. admiring the glistening cream she's producing, as he slaps her right cheek, and drills into her, going as deep as he can. as her walls begin to close around him, he moves his dominant hand up to her neck, gripping it softly, and urging her to cum. his mind is free of everything else, but he subconsciously thanks audra for the fight they had earlier leading up to this.

if anyone were to tell her that she would find herself naked on the edge of a Jacuzzi while her cousins ex boyfriend ate her out, shed tell them they were crazy. the dynamic between them never being anything more than destructive at times, caring deeply for the other but not in the way that would bring them to this experience. coming to the random hotel she expected the usual blunts and bottles, but she was more than happy with the position she found herself in. a smirk found its way on her face as he repeated her words, while they both knew better, in this moment they were each others. nothing stopping them from living out their wildest fantasies. while the jacuzzi wasnt her first choice, there was something sensual about the area. being out in the public eye but still being totally private, the jets creating a sort of numbness on their skins if they were submerged. she watches as he slips out of his shorts, not even bothering to hide the action as her eyes trained to his cock, her bottom lip slipping between her teeth as she slowly raked his body. slowly working up till she met his gaze, a smirk crossing her features. her hands coming to rest around his neck, kissing him back with small giggles as she was swept from her spot. pecking his lips one more time as her hand fell to stroke him a few times, a small nod following his words. allowing herself to be positioned as he wished. her hands placed firmly on the concrete under her as she pushed back slightly onto him. A sharp intake of breathe as he pressed into her. whimpers falling from her lips at his pace, encouraging him to go harder. soon loud cries of pleasure fell from her lips, breathy words of encouragement for him, pushing back to meet his thrusts. "faster baby," she spoke with a loud moan, her back arching when he hit her spot. "right there, daddy, keep going," she could feel a knot tightening, "fuck," an almost pornographic moan coming from her lips as his hand came to rest on her throat, her own coming to rest over his a squeeze to tell him he can choke her harder as she slowly came undone underneath him.

anyone who set eyes on lia and knew of her, could assume she'd be a bit wild between the sheets. but she’d exceeded drew’s expectations. the arch of her back, giving him perfect access to the spot he wanted to reach, her meeting his each and every thrust, and the way they both were sexually connected in the moment. knowing exactly where the other wants to be touched, what the other wants to hear and when. he's had bad sex before, he’s sure she has her stories too, but drew feels like he met his match. he grants her wish, picking up speed, pounding into her like she wants. he’s close, and the feeling of her walls clenching around him, the juices coating him, as she rides her orgasm out. “so good baby girl, so good” he mutters out, knowing it's only a matter of seconds before he joins her. gripping her throat a little rougher, he slams into her will full force, burying himself within her. he feels it all, the tightening, the pleasure, the twitch and he lets out a satisfied groan as he removes his hand from around her and pulls out as quickly as he can, the semen falling in the water. he slips his swimming trucks back on, walks over to her, and gives her a passionate kiss, moving her now damp hair out of her face, still panting. “what do you say we go upstairs to our room, and go for round 2?” he smiles at her, as he hands her the bottoms to her bikini. “i’ll even keep my promise and carry you up” he winks, picking up the two nearby towels, and wrapping it around her shoulders.

like with most of the guys in the school, she had her suspicions of how Drew was in the bedroom. but everything she had thought was surpassed that night. meeting him match for match as the night went along, knowing every little thing the other wanted as the night went. there was something laying in the air around them, something that no one would be able to explain. not even the two teenagers in the jacuzzi, becoming undone within each other, forgetting the stress of world around them for just a moment. lia let out one final whimper, feeling him pull out of her. standing on shaky legs as she sat on the side of the jacuzzi, swinging her legs over to land on the steps. watching as drew collected their clothes. her hand cupping his face as she kissed him back with equal passion, maybe even more. "I think that sounds perfect," A small chuckle as she slipped her bottoms on, "Piggyback ride?" She asked a small pout on her lips as she feigned innocence towards the boy despite the less then innocent acts transpired less then a few minutes prior.

the morning after.

all that is heard is the default ringtone of an iphone, and chestnut orbs flutter open at the alarming sound. his right hand immediately goes to his head, as he shields his eyes from the sunlight through the hotel’s thin curtains, his head throbbing in pain. doesn’t miss the fact that he's completely naked under the covers. he remembers bits and pieces of last night, can taste the remnants of peach ciroc on his tongue, the groggy feeling he has because of the weed from the night prior. he tries to recollect his memory, before his phone starts ringing again, and he declines it, before looking at the notifications. 7 missed calls from audra torres, 15 text messages from audra torres. he groans, before hearing a shift in the bed, and looks over to find none other than the beauty that is lia rosenburg under the blankets, also naked from what he can tell. 

he fumbles out of the sheets, muttering out a “fuck,” at his current situation. scrambling to get his jeans on, while the memories flash in his mind, the sex, the wanting, the way he felt. he goes to the other side of the bed, still shirtless, as he shakes her awake gently, “lia?” he calls out, as he moves the hair out of her face just like he had the night before. 

The incessant buzzing from a phone was beginning to get to lia. Her head pounding and wanting nothing more than to fall asleep, and stay that way for the rest of the day. A huff being let out as she pulled the blanket over her head, tucking herself deeper into the blanket, trying to drown out the noise. Without even blinking her eyes open she pushed the source of the voice away. “Sleep,” she spoke softly, wrapping the blanket around her hand, uncovering her face again, pulling it up under her chin. her head throbbing as she let out a quiet groan, the brightness from the sun to much even with her eyes closed. her throat raw from what she assumed to be weed she smoked, the lingering taste in her mouth mixed with what she thought was some sort of peach vodka, based on the headache she had. Snap shots of the night prior dancing in her head, slowly sitting up as she let out a light groan, her hips feeling sore, as if she spent the night on a bike. Holding onto the blanket as she ran her fingers through her hair she slowly turned to the source of the noise. Her eyes finding a naked torso, slowly trailing her eyes up their form.

Lia couldnt help the small gasp as she made eye contact with Drew Torres, all the memories of the night prior hitting her at once. Every little touch, every word, emotion flooding back. Her head falling as she fell back against the headboard, not knowing what to say. Her mind flooding with all the consequences of what they did, but something within her still feeling on fire as she recounted their entire night.

drew can't help but gaze at the girl, giving her a soft smile, before running hands through his brunette hair, and sitting down on the side of the bed. the room is half trashed, and he wonders if they had sex here too, before shrugging it off as an ‘of course’. looking at the home screen of his phone again, he finds that it’s 9:24 AM, and they’re expected to be checked out by noon. he scratches the back of his neck, before giving lia another once over, catching the hickeys painted onto her neck. “did we?” he asks, motioning to himself then her, doesn't specify, but they both know what he means.

she brought her head back up, giving him small smile as well, glancing around for any shirt she could find quickly. her eyes taking in the state of the room, bottles and empty blunt packages scattered around. she knew what they did, her mind racing as she thought of all the things that could go wrong. she didnt know how many times they had sex, but she did know her legs were killing her, and it was gonna be a fun walk to the elevator. her eyes caught his gaze, chuckling softly at his words, her hand coming to run through her hair, as much as she could anyway. The blanket falling from her shoulders ever so slightly, "I think we did," She spoke, biting her lip softly as she processed her words.

[thewalkingdead-imagines]

Negan Imagine ~ Sleigh Ride

Summary: Negan takes the reader on a trip outside the Sanctuary that ends better than she thought

This is my entry for @ne-gans lisas5kxmaschallenge and my prompt was “sledding”! I had a lot of fun with this, and I really hope you all will enjoy this too! 

“Hey, don’t fall asleep on me”, a deep voice rumbled through to you as the truck vibrated softly beneath you, keeping your eyes from falling shut, even though the tiredness that was stuck in your bones kept putting more weight on your lids. You could feel Negan nudging you slightly with his prepared can of coffee, his signature grin growing all over his lips as soon as your eyes glanced at him, then to the can,”Need you here with me.” You let out a drowsy grunt, stretching your entangled limbs that had kept you in an embryo-like position in the passenger seat beside Negan. With another small huff you grabbed the can, turned its lid just enough to open it and eventually allow the hot and wakening coffee to run down your throat, filling you for a short moment with the feeling that it could actually work. “Why did we have to move out so early, Negan?”, you mumbled as you put the can back to the other things he had prepared for your little trip in the early morning hours away from the Sanctuary and through the winter wonderland the world had turned into over night. When he had stood before your door just more than an hour ago, with his arms full of supplies, the sky had still been pitch black, giving you the feeling that nearly no time had passed since you had fallen into bed after work. If it was up to you, you could have just cuddled up with him on the bed, waited until at least the sun was up and then get going but this wasn’t Negan’s plan. His plan was laying behind your seats in the truck and it was nothing else than a damn sleigh. The thing probably hadn’t seen the daylight since the world had gone to shit but that would most certainly change in near future, judging from the excited glance in his eyes as they ran over the new fallen but still thick layer of snow that laid over the woods. You still had to figure out why exactly the big bad wolf wanted to go out of all things sledding with you, but you had your few guesses even though your still tired mind didn’t allow you to widen them too much. “Baby, we had to get going ‘cause your man’s still got shit to do ‘round home, and ‘cause we go now, we got an assload of time just for us”, he explained, glancing over to you as one of his large hands gripped the steering wheel tighter, while the other one reached towards your leg, squeezing your thigh with a larger growing grin as soon as he caught the shiver his touch elicited within you. “Besides, that’s what my mom did with me when I was a damn kid, had to go to work till late evening so she got me up at the asscrack of dawn so we could still go sledding before all the other kids had fucked up the hill with their dumbass sleds”, he said, a soft smile mixing into the grin, his eyes wandering over the road in front of him and the sky that slowly grew lighter as he served you the answer to your question why he wanted to go sledding on a sliver plate. You smiled slightly to yourself, allowing your glance to wander over his face and catch the way the nostalgia was flooding his veins and grasping his handsome features. For a short moment you drifted off into memories as well, caught by what had been and what still could be if the dead hadn’t begun to walk the earth. “Dreaming?”, Negan asked after a short silence with a soft chuckle, his fingers tracing along your knee as you shook your head slightly. “Nah...just got caught up by nostalgia”, you mumbled, before you pushed the thoughts out of your head as you glanced through the truck, grinning as other thoughts quickly replaced them “Oh and wondering you didn’t hang up some mistletoes in here too.” “Fuck...should’ve thought about that”, he said with a throaty chuckle, pushing the steering wheel with a groan before he shook his head slightly, grinning wider as he glanced over at you. “Ya know what I just realized?”, he asked, dragging his tongue over his lower lip with relish ,”I’ve never fucked on a sled, we could change that.” “Mhmm sure”, you chuckled, irony swinging through your voice ,”You couldn’t even get me under a mistletoe yet so-” “Yet”, he retorted quickly, raising his hand from your leg to point his finger demonstratively into the air,”Still got some time” “Good luck with that”, you chuckled, feeling his hand squeezing your thigh once more as he laid it back down your leg before he nodded towards the supplies in the foot room before your seat. “Now eat your croissant, need you to be all strong and full.” “Sure, Mom.” “Eat or I fill ya up with something else”, he chuckled, trying to sound firm even though the tease sounded fully through his deep voice as shook your head with a laugh and eventually reached towards the supplies and crammed out the food. You had just stuffed the last piece of the chocolate croissant into your mouth as a deep gasp left his lips and his hand shot up to point into the white landscape before you. “There we are!”

“Gotta go by foot, just a couple minutes”, Negan said minutes later while he held his now in leather gloved hand up as he stood in front of your opened truck door. The cold was already biting into your skin as you shifted towards your seat’s edge, even though there was no way you could deny how beautiful the snow looked with the morning sun shining down on it, enlightening it like a sea of sparkling diamonds. With a quick movement you got the gloves over your hands Negan had brought with him this morning as well, before smiling down to him as you slid your hand into his large one, feeling his warmth even through the layers. The snow scrunched beneath your shoes as you hopped down from the warm truck into the iciness of the woods, landing right in front of Negan who grinned widely down at you. “Ready?” “Do I have another choice?”, you teased, eliciting a throaty chuckle to rumble through his body, shaking his firm chest beneath the leather jacket and the red scarf. “Anyway, you wanna take Lucille? I take that heavy ass sled”, he said, nodding towards his beloved bat that leaned against the truck’s side, along with the sled that would have to get carried through the forest’s undergrowth. Nodding you leaned towards her, sliding your fingers around the wood where Negan’s usually rested before swinging her up until the spikes of the barbed wire dug softly into your coat as she leaned onto your shoulder. “Suits you”, Negan mumbled with a grin, his glance wandering from his bat to your face as you gripped his bat a little tighter, trying to keep it balanced. “Alright, then lets go.” “Just some more steps and we’re there!”, Negan called enthusiastically out, pulling his long limbs up to climb over the snow-covered roots and bushes while trying his best to keep the sleigh securely in his arms and pressed against his side. You hummed in response as you glanced forward, looking at the snowy trees that were slowly becoming a little less dense until you finally arrived at Negan’s long announced destination that spread out in all its beauty right in front of you. Your eyes ran over the landscape, over a hill that was going in a soft curve downwards until it ran softly out, forming into a field that was surrounded by a slim and only dabbling river, enlightened by the stronger growing sun beams. Negan had a big mouth for sure but differently to other men who were all bark and no bite, you couldn’t deny that he actually lived up to his announcements, no matter how big they were. And the proof for that was unfurling right in front of you in these very moments. “Now would you look at that!”, he called out, stomping a little closer out of the woods as he let the sleigh fall next to him into the fluffy snow. “Now I know it’s not as fuckin’ pretty as you, Baby but...ya don’t regret coming out with me now that you see this fucking beauty, huh?”, he throatily chuckled as he caught the way your eyes lighted up by the picture in front of you. You let out a soft snort, feeling your cheeks flushing more than they already were from the cold and the tingling in your stomach increasing with each more second those hazel eyes of his ran over your flushed face. “How did you find it?”, you mumbled, shaking the speechlessness about him a little off. “On a run ‘round here. Come here when shit’s too much back home...ya know, once in a while”, he shrugged softly, looking into the distance before glancing back at you, “Thought you’d like it too.” “I do”, you mumbled, taken aback by the sudden softness that filled his eyes before you got distracted by the large grin that began to form again on his lips. “Well, now that makes me one happy fucker”, he said as he winked at you before nodding towards the landscape, “So we’re gonna get started or what?” The cord of the sleigh felt rough in your gloved hands and the wood was pressing against your legs as you found yourself sitting on its front, waiting for Negan to place Lucille securely against a tree and get ready to sit down as well. “Gonna get cozy on there”, you could hear him chuckle from somewhere behind you, the slurfing steps he made through the snow coming closer with each moment until he plopped down onto it behind you. Within seconds his warmth was pressing against your back, his arms sneaking around you to hold you tight while his warm breath began to brush over your neck and the bit skin that was uncovered. “Okay, I got ya”, he lowly grumbled, the sound in his deep voice letting your stomach dip more than you liked to admit. For a short moment you could feel him leaning a little more in, nuzzling his nose past your scarf and into your skin before he in and exhaled slightly, allowing his hot breath to spread more goosebumps over your body and put you for a moment into a state of trance. “Changed your mind about my little offer from before? I’m still ready to cross fucking on this thing off my list”, he chuckled, tightening his arms around you a little more as you could already feel how you threatened to melt right there in his arms. “Nah, let’s get down there”, you mumbled with the last bit of determination that was stuck in you, feeling how a low laugh let his chest rumble against your back. “Alright”, he amusedly chuckled, the tone in his voice giving away that he exactly knew what he was doing to you. Carefully, you eventually moved towards the slope, both of you trying to keep your legs under control as you shuffled through the snow before you stood shortly before the threshold. “Get those legs hooked in, Baby. I’ll do the rest. Hold on tight”, he chuckled, pressing his body closer against yours as you did as he said and stemmed your feet onto the sled’s runners and felt Negan beginning to push. “Here we - GO”, with that he pushed you over the threshold, allowing the sled to dive down the slope while a rush of adrenaline flooded your veins, mixing with the heat Negan’s touch brought into your whole body. “Oh fuck, oh fuck!”, you called half laughing, half yelling out as you could feel the sled picking pace up while your voice mixed with the booming laughter of Negan behind you. Your fingers grasped the cord tightly as you pressed your back into Negan’s chest and his tight embrace while the hill rushed past you, faster and faster with each moment, simultaneously with your louder becoming laughs and shrieks. “Ah shit”, you called out as you felt it moving even faster beneath you, the cold air hitting your face and brushing along your body right until you got to the flatter becoming field and Negan stretched his legs out to stop the both of you from rushing further. “Gotcha”, he panted with a low laugh as the sleigh finally came to a stop and your bodies shook a little forward in response to the halting movement. Adrenaline was still rushing through you as you sunk a little back, feeling how Negan embraced you tighter and let his head lean against yours until his lips brushed against your ear. “Shit, if you scream like that in bed too-”, he chuckled, stopping as you nudged him with your elbow, although only softly and barely palpable as you were still too caught up in the cloud the adrenaline had pushed you in. Nevertheless more blood rushed into your cheeks, reddening them even more as his words reechoed through your head.  “Now this isn’t just a blush from the cold, huh?”, you heard Negan lowly and with a tease filled tone mumble as his glove hand reached up, grasped your chin gently and tilted it until you had to look straight into his eyes. For a moment you lacked of words, your whole attention caught up in those hazel eyes that had more power over you than you’d like to own up to. “Looks like my idea wasn't so bad after all, huh? At least when I gotta judge from that speechlessness right there”, he chuckled, biting his lips slightly as you finally got yourself out of this bubble he was beginning to put you in. “Never said it was bad, just the time of the day”, you softly chuckled, seeing how he raised his brows and gave you another toothy grin. His fingers were still grasping your chin just like his other arm was still wrapped tightly around you, and the mixture of his scent and the warmth that was radiating from him elicited the urge in you to melt into his embrace and just give all of yourself to him. You were balancing on a thin rope, just like all the nights he snuck into your room and your bed, wrapping those strong arms around your body as he huddled his tall and broad frame up to you. And no matter if you stayed like this until dawn or began to talk and laugh through the night, with each more time he came in you knew the wall that kept you from letting him fully in was becoming thinner  and the fantasies and longings about him stronger. “We should get that sled up again”, you caught yourself mumbling in an act of your last defense, catching how Negan shook his head with a grin, as if he could read your mind before he licked quickly over his lip and nodded up the hill. “Alrighty, Sweetheart, lets get that fucker up.” Your clothes were clinging to your body as you made your way for about the sixth time up the hill, panting softly as the layers of wetted fabric and the snow didn’t make the path any easier. Sledding really was a shit ton of fun, especially with Negan by your side, but you would gladly pass on the way up. “If you would’ve eaten all of the food I got ya, you’d have enough fuckin power to get up here lickity-split”, Negan chuckled as he dragged the sled next to you up the hill, grinning as he caught your red flushed face. “Nah by that amount, i would’ve thrown up for sure”, you teased back, hearing how a throaty chuckle left his lips as he stemmed himself further up the hill. Just as your glance strayed from him and looked at the snowy ground, your foot settled down for the next step but instead of hitting earth beneath the snow, something icy and slippery welcomed you instead. A gasp left your lips as soon as you felt yourself slipping away, your hands whirling around you to find something to grasp before gravity could give you the rest.  “Negan!”, you choked out, your fingers grasping his arm in a last attempt to save yourself from falling right as a pair of widened hazel eyes caught yours and a large hand reached out to catch your arm. “I got yo- fuck”, he called out as you could feel him losing control of his body as well, stumbling backwards as both of you kept trying to find your balance back but instead lost even more of it. With a groan and a loud curse that slipped out of your lips, your back hit the snowy ground that cushioned the blow a little as you felt Negan falling atop of you, his arms still trying to grasp you as you rolled only a short bit further down until you met the flatter becoming field again. “Shit, you okay?”, you heard him pant as soon as you laid still, your back pressing into the snow while his body was shifting on top of you, your eyes catching his in the split of a second. “Yeah, you?”, you grumbled, breathing deeply out as his eyes were still running worriedly over your face before the absence of any more pain let his glance soften a little. “All fuckin’ fine”, he mumbled, giving you a slight nod before he glanced up and squeezed his eyes a little, catching something in the distance. “Fuckin’ sled”, he grumbled as you tilted your head a bit, glancing to your side as you caught the sleigh that had come a good bit away from you finally to a stop. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”, you mumbled, sighing quietly as you shifted a little, feeling how your clothes began to become more covered in snow that slowly melted in response to your body’s warmth. “Really?”, Negan chuckled teasingly instead, grinning widely at you as he glanced down at your joined bodies and entangled limbs, raising his brows suggestively as soon as his glance met yours again. “Oh my”, you groaned, shoving his chest that rumbled beneath the snow covered leather jacket. “You got snow fuckin’ everywhere, you know that?”, he softly chuckled as his gloved hand reached up and stroked along your face and hair, brushing the snow flakes out of it while your eyes stayed fixed on him. He had some of the flakes in his dark hair and the salt and pepper beard himself, both of them glistening a little from the ones that had already molten. The sun and the light’s reflection from the snow let his roaming eyes gleam up even more, enlightening the brown in his hazel eyes like a pot of honey and the green like a deep and vivid forest.  God, you were getting lost in them again but the more you glanced at the man hovering above you, the more you had to realize that every defense was long gone, everything else was just pretense. You were falling for him, hard, and there was no way anymore for you to deny it. And right now, you didn’t even want to anymore. Not with his intoxicating scent surrounding you, not with his body pressed up against yours, not with his fingers caressing along your face, not with those eyes wandering over you, not with his hot breath brushing over your skin. Your head felt like spinning and your emotions and senses were slowly beginning to run wild as you could feel him leaning closer down, his glance testing as if he wanted to check for a last time if you were alright with his next move until you finally felt his lips brushing over yours. Still careful and if half of him still expected you to change your mind and pull back, but instead you reached up and leaned into his kiss, your gloved fingers entangling in his dark and wetted hair. A deep but soft groan of his vibrated against your lips as he sunk into you, deepening your kiss as the sound and his taste allowed a heat to pool in your body that let you forget the iciness around you. You hummed into his kiss, clinging to his body as you could feel the tension that had built up between you finally being set free. Even though his movements were skilled, his lips moved over yours as if he had been starved, almost uncontrolled and if he was getting as lost in you as you were getting lost in him. You were only letting go of each other as soon as your bodies longed too much for oxygen, forcing your lips to part even though you remained close to one another, forehead pressing against forehead. Your eyes stayed closed until your lips formed into a smile, beginning to realize what had just happened before your lids fluttered slowly open, a spark of curiosity enflaming within you to see Negan’s reaction. “Damn...”, you finally heard him quietly mumble after your eyes caught his and a trance like silence had passed as you saw them running over your face as he still held you tightly to himself. “Fuck, you had me fuckin’ speechless for moment there, Baby...touché”, he mumbled with a soft grin on his lips, leaning in to give your lips another peck before he grumbled with a low chuckle against your lips. “But look, Sweetheart. I didn’t even need a fucking mistletoe, just some slippery shit” “And fuck, there he is again!”, you laughed, shoving his chest slightly before leaning up to kiss him softly once more, longing to feel those lips on yours again and feel his beard stubble tickling your skin. Just as your lips parted, the cold around you let a shiver run through your body, hard enough for Negan to notice as he backed slightly away to glance down at you. “Shit, you’re freezing, huh?”, he grumbled, shifting slightly before the worried glance turned into the roguish one you were used to, simultaneously with the large grin that formed back on his lips and allowed his dimples to shine through the salt and pepper beard. “Ya know what? Let’s get that sled and head back to the truck, I got loads of ideas how to get ya warm again”, he said, his tongue running over his lower lip with relish as he winked teasingly at you. “Sure you do”, you chuckled before your laugh got stuck in your throats as his lips crashed on yours and brought the heat back into your trembling body.

And so you melted right there into his kiss and his embrace once again, forgetting the icy coldness and thick snow around you until you made your way back to the truck, arm in arm, with kiss swollen lips and bodies filled up to the rim with happiness and the longing for more.

tagging:

@agespenst @imaginesforthepeople @porgs-r-us @squidgy84 @toxic-ink @Nobodylastname @nice-shoes-nerd @thegirlwiththelyrics99 @tolieboy @writteninthestars288 @magical-spit @straightestgay-voice @xsnak-3x @myrabbitholetoneverland  @dasani-saraai @negan-is-god @harry-titss @traumbruch @negans-network @theblankestostares @amysuemc @ashzombie13 @trashimaginezblog @jeffreydeanneganstrash @sweetwittlebosco @futureofdestiel @bananakid42 @dragongirl420 @kalliewinchester-queenofhell @futureofdestiel @timeladyrikaofgallifrey @osakamilk @kattyshea20 @dinodiegos @missmotherhen @kinkygamertrash @beahippie23 @xabeautifultragedyx @negansmagic @starwarsandstufff @bdohe21 @lovesjdm @vanilla-negan @to-pick-ourselves-up-7 @roselover159 @mamarhee @the-writingdead @traumbruch @bellawindixon @dlb1999 @thelittlewolf45 @collette04 @ask-kakashihatake @princessbelgoof @adixon13@botanicalthoughts @nijiru @cheyanhicks @jtklover123 @twentyonewalkerss @originalwinchestervamp @readytourie @ijashanaa @i-am-lady-anarchy @marauderspads @humble-thumb @hp-hogwartsexpress @mydeliciousdandelion @warriorqueen1991 @unholyjs @kentuckywalker @mydeliciousdandelion @dancing-in-embers @gackts-guwashi @ugh-abbyxx @frozenhuntress67 @hela-rious48 @thoughtfullyoptimisticgalaxy @xojeffreydeanmorgan @thelittlewolf45 @babygirlmeepi @thehybridsqueen @blueeyedsoutherngal @naniky @negans-network @the-wintergirl @fangirl-and-medstudent-help @lovesjdm

(In case you want to be tagged or untagged for specific things or everything I write, just let me know! Also: The gif is not mine, I got it from google so credit to the original owner)

[feel199x]

 gang!au, gang member!han jisung, florist!reader, underground band!au

chapters: I II III IV V VI VII VIII IX X masterlist

warnings: angst and themes of abuse and trauma

🌸 a/n: i actually finished this fic, and it’ll be up in my queue to post over the weekend! it’s kind of exciting to be finally finishing this fic! a hint  for the next chapter is at the end!! hehe

🌸 song rec: arsonist’s lullaby

Your eyelids were still heavy when you awoke. In front of you, though your eyes still blurry you made out a flower vase. You tried to move, suddenly desperate to feel the petals against your fingertips. Even though they were azaleas, petunias, globe amarths, carrot flowers, and asphodels- all dressed in a void black vase. You knew what it meant, you knew what it threatened. But you found your arms sore, propped up and irritated from the handcuffs that hung from the ceiling. As you looked down, your head getting too heavy for your neck to support, you found yourself surrounded eglantines, lemon and peach blossoms, lungworts, phlox, and red rose petals. You couldn’t help but let out a choked sob, your wrists burning, the metal digging into your skin. You arms stayed propped up, but the numb feeling began to spread through your body. You didn’t even look up as he came in, even as he made sure to slam the door shut.

“You know why you’re in here?” You didn’t answer, your voice all used up from crying. You could feel his fingers on your jaw, propping your face up so you could look straight up at him. You couldn’t make his face out completely, your vision blurred but not fading. There were already bruises there you knew, and he pressed down on them further. “Do you? I try so hard to control myself, and here you are, still acting up.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Are you? I should just leave you here, let you learn your lesson.”

His thumb rested against your chin, looking at you intently- what could almost be mistaken as sympathy. It was deja vu, sitting there like a doll. “But I can’t resist you, can I?” No, you guess he couldn’t. That was the funny thing, right? He couldn’t expect to, how could he resist these primal urges? He talked and talked about nothing, and you were glad that you couldn’t pay attention to his words anyway, mind foggy and complacent. “I even brought you flowers. You didn’t have these in your shop, huh? So I got them. I’m a good husband.”

“Husband?”

“Good thing you’re pretty.” He got up, reaching over you and pulled something off your, well, ring finger. “See that? That cost more than your stupid shop.”

Stupid shop.

He slipped it back on, sitting back down next to you as he continued to talk.

“How long,” you paused, voice weak and raspy, quiet, “has it been?”

He seemed surprised by your question, eyebrows digging into his forehead in sudden anger. He got up and paced around the cramped room, not even bothering to watch him as you stared down at your own clothes- crinkled and dirty. “Why do you care?” he seethed, “I could treat you better than he ever could. A low-level drug dealer and a shitty, amateur rapper. Do you see lover boy here? No, you don’t. ‘Cause he’s dead.”

You let out a small gasp, tears brimming at the corners of your eyes and you looked at him. “What did you do?” you weeped, “Please- please, please tell me what you did.” His pacing came to a stop as he looked at you, face contorted with anger. “I got my co-workers to shoot him and friends dead, that’s what I did. Because you’re mine. Always and forever.”

You didn’t know what was true and what wasn’t- he couldn’t exactly be trusted. You grew impulsive, angry with him. Jisung would never, Jisung could never. He wasn’t that type of person- he could never take advantage of people, he could never keep something like that from of you. And here your captor was, smothering ash over Jisung’s name. But you knew he wasn’t lying about shooting Jisung and his friends, even if you didn’t want to believe it. He had tried the same thing with your family back then too. You felt guilty, at fault like you were the one behind the trigger. Anger bubbled like sparkling in your throat like bubbling water, steaming with impulsivity.

“You should kill me too then. I’d rather rot in the ground next to Jisung than spend another second looking at you.”

You knew your goal should’ve been to play the long game, especially after your failed attempt some time ago. How long has it been? You weren’t sure, there weren’t any windows in the room- and the white painted walls burned into your eyes. If you made him angry now, it would only take longer to gain his trust, but the damage was already done- you could feel the blood pouring out of the back of your head. You might’ve been dying, but you didn’t really care. You couldn’t even feel the pain from the hit from the adrenaline, so you continued to push your luck. Because it was true, Jisung had kept you going, your shop had kept you going. How would you ever be able to look another flower without seeing his face?

“He loved me better than you ever did and he didn’t even ask me to be his lover yet. Lover boy is better than you even dream about.”

It wasn’t like you to speak out of your turn, especially with the looming threat of death. You were too far gone, the warmth of blood streaming down your back. The bruises on your jaw from your grip deepening in color as his grip tightened, yelling some nonsense.

Still, even as he looked into your eyes, his breath hot on you- all you could think about was Jisung. How could you not? Your mind swam through melancholy memories.

You were in his arms tonight. His arms drooped over your shoulder, his head pressed against yours- lips brushing against your jaw as he whispered commentary about the movie you were watching. You were leaning against his chest, feeling his heart beat against your back. Knees propped up as his legs circled around you.

“I love you,” he murmured, “probably more than like, shrek.”

“I would hope so, shrek doesn’t feed you,” you paused, “But I love you too.”

And it was true, but you were unsure of the extent of your infatuation and devotion he was refering to. You wanted to say you were in love with him, but it was too much of a risk. If you scared him off now, who would come by your flower shop to spend time with you? Who would carry you off your bed during the weekends just to go to the convience store. Who would wrap arms and limbs around you and sing you to sleep at night after nightmares, after remembering? Did it even matter? You’ve never felt like this before, the only thing that came close was your devotion was your flowers. Maybe it should’ve scared you, that suddenly there was someone with so much importace to you, on the same level as the only thing that got through the Incident. You turned your head, the side pressed against Jisung’s chest. His arms moved to wrap around you waist, tightening around you. Your nose was touching his, lips only a breath away- but he was crying.

“Jisung,” you said softly, “Why are you crying? You chose this movie.”

“Do you think people in love will always end up together?”

You laced your hands in his, intertwining the both of them. “Of course,” you whispered, “Love finds a way.”

You thought it would happen then, his lips practically on top of yours- but it didn’t. He turned from you, his adam’s apple bobbing up and down- something caught in his throat. “Even if the person lied?”

“I guess it depends on the ‘sung. As long as it wouldn’t change your perception of the person in a way that hurt the relationship too much, I think they could make it.”

“What if it did? What if the person wasn’t as good as you thought they were?”

“Sung, is something going on? You can talk to me, I’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”

“You can’t. I can’t. We can’t.”

“Sung,” You cupped his face, making him look at you. You turned around, and his embrace loosened but remained around your waist. “I love you. You’re my best friend. I love you more than my shop. I promise that I always will, no matter the circumstances. You’re a good person, I know that. I promise, I pinky-promise.” You held up your pinky, and he brushed away his tears wrapping his finger around yours.

You don’t remember exactly what he had said before he left, something about a band dropping out of the club he played at. He had gotten a call and gathered his things almost immediately. You offered to go with him, you always wanted to see him live with his fans but he always refused. He said that it wasn’t your scene, and all grimy- it wasn’t somewhere you should be, not a play for someone pure as you. But you didn’t feel pure and insisted that he was the purer of you two. But it didn’t matter, when Jisung’s mind was set, it was set. He kissed your forehead, and before the door close he wrapped his pinky around yours without another word.

And then Jisung disappeared again.

It wasn’t the first time, but it was one of the longest. The days dragged on, the day having to pull and drag the night up into the sky. Even the sky’s star shined dimly, there only because of obligation. Ever since you started making arrangements back home at your mother’s flower store, you never liked roses much. But now you were starting to understand people’s obsession with them. It was an iconic symbol of love, everyone’s go-to, and you supposed there was a good reason for that. Its smell was sickeningly sweet, and the petals like velvet. You started getting letters in the mail. It happened every day. And even though you were flattered, you began to get worried. Worry arising.

After four months, you finally saw Jisung again. He kept somewhat in contact, but he had been busy. There were two months with complete radio silence, and one night you saw news coverage of shots fired in a car chase. You hadn’t put two and two together then, not even as you saw Jisung slightly limp as he moved around your store. You remember being conflicted about asking him, but as he kept telling you about his stories featuring his group members, you got lost.

That’s the night it all happened.

But before that, way before that. Maybe it really was love at first sight.

After the hose incident, you found Jisung lingering around your store until closing time. He had brought sweets every day for two weeks until you invited him back up to your apartment.

“Thank god,” he groaned, “My grandmother said if it didn’t work this time, she was going to interfere. Jokes on her, though, I’ve been stealing sweets forever.”

You laughed, getting bold after closing the shop and tugging at his wrist as you pulled him up the metal spiral stairs. “I would be more worried about Minho,” you teased, “you’d better not be slacking off during practice or he’ll chew you out.”

“Ew, ugh! Don’t remind me.”

“So, um,” you looked down, “What do you want to do?”

“Can I pick a movie?”

He had chosen a romance movie, you could’ve gone to the theater instead, but he insisted that he would pay you back for the fee- and that going to the theater would never be better than streaming at home. You didn’t mind romance movies, they were fun to watch. But during the less tense parts of the movies, you could feel yourself falling asleep and before you knew it your head was on his shoulder. If you were less sleepy, you would’ve freaked out as he pulled you closer is fingers lightly drawing shapes on your hips. You awoke when you felt Jisung’s chest heave and you looked up to see him crying. It was the first time you saw Jisung cry, and it broke your heart.

“Jisung, are you okay? We can change the movie if it’s too much…”

“No! Sorry, it’s just…”

“It’s just?”

“I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than love. I’m going to have a love like this one day. And I can’t wait. Thinking about makes me cry.”

 You were awake now. Eyes glazed over, still heavy with exhaustion and sleep. The blood down your back had dried now, you could feel your hair all bunched together and sticky with the flaky dried and blood. It was throbbing, pulsing almost- the headache was unbearable. How long has it been? How long would it be? You tried moving your legs, a numb static began to make you grow in discomfort. It was for the better though, because otherwise you would’ve felt the rope digging in and around your ankles. It was hard, you had to press your wrists further against the cuffs in order to help yourself. It was awkward, like a baby learning how to walk. It must’ve been hours when you stood there, the feeling finally returning to your legs. Your arms were relieved with the ability to relax, even if they were in an awkward position. They were still strung up, but at least your upper arm could relax.

The flowers in the room had been replaced, but the petals around you were starting to become crisp and brown. Alstroemerias, altheas, arbutus, red and yellow balsams, Japanese rose, jumpers, and kalmias. It made you shiver with disgust and fear. Where was he getting these flowers? Was he going back to your shop? 

You collapsed suddenly, your legs caving in on yourself. Your wrists pulled at harshly as your knees hit the floor. Have you eaten? You couldn’t have, how long has it been? Your stomach began to turn, you were hungry, but that was the least of your worries. Was Jisung really dead? What about his friends, Minho, Chan and everyone else? Were they dead too? How were you to expected to live with yourself, knowing you had brought his misfortune on all of them? If they were alive, how could you expect them to forgive you for the mess you had made? You couldn’t, and you would have to live with the guilt of hurting Jisung for the rest of your life. Because you knew it was dangerous, falling in love with someone knowing that it could be turned against you at any moment- but you did anyway. And now you had dug your own grave. Thoughts were growing difficult to form, the space growing through your coherent thoughts. All you could was feel.

How much time has passed? Months? Weeks? Days? Hours? Minutes? All you knew was white. You could see the walls fill in the spots in your vision. It was irrational, but you began to hate the white painted walls. The lack of color was draining you, except for the vase in front of you. You wanted to kick it, destroy it completely- you wanted to move and release everything- every emotion and irrational thought boiling with impulsivity in your head. The only thought going through your head, getting louder and louder, blocking the diminishing number of coherent thoughts.

Jisung is dead.

Jisung is dead.

Jisung is dead.

Jisung is dead.

Jisung is dead.

Jisung is dead.

You cried, even as dehydrated as you were. Your voice was raspy, and you couldn’t even speak words of comfort to yourself. You couldn’t remember, you couldn’t make them out.”It’s…going….to...be...okay.” Maybe it was pathetic but you were the only one you could lean on. You couldn’t hang on to the hope that someone was going to rescue you, especially if the only people you were dead- or angry because of the mess you had caused.

“Have you learned your lesson?”

You looked up, vision spotty and glazed with tears, and nodded desperately. You were mad at yourself for giving in so easily. “You’re pretty like this, “ he cooed, “All broken down and desperate.” He stroked your hair, fingers getting caught in your bloodied hair. “I bet you’re hungry, hm? I’m not going to let you go, so you’re going to have to let me feed you. I’d hate to have to...well, you know.”

You wish you didn’t.

 It felt like you were giving in as you ate, the food dry and difficult to swallow. He sat there for a while. The water he made you drink missed your mouth and streamed down your neck. You sat there, helpless, unable to clean yourself. “What a pretty mess,” he murmured, “What a pretty mouth. Just for me.” You hated him, you did. You hated him like forest fire, like the damage of a natural disaster. He disgusted you, he was disgusting- time and time again, he had taken everything that mattered to you. And he won. You felt pathetic, useless. Jisung was dead, dead and gone and you felt like it was all your fault. It made you shake, your heart thumping against your ribcage, begging to get out.

His phone rang, the ringtone burning in your ear. “Yes… I told you...Just get it...Dead.” He must’ve heard you lean against the metal cuffs, because he got up. He smiled, using his thumb to wipe the water off your lips. You were beginning to panic again, maybe it was a small chance that he was talking about Jisung and stray kids, but any chance was big enough to get worried. Before he closed the door, before you could give a second thought: “Help me take..a bath. Please.” Even with your soft, raspy and broken voice, it was enough to get his attention. Words were getting harder to form, it was getting to harder to even think- but you had to warn them, even if you don’t know what the danger was. Because if the call was about them, some of them were alive- and that meant you could clean up some of your mess, or at least make up for it. He ended the call quickly, uncuffing you. You arms immediately dropped, hands slamming against the floor.

“I knew you would come around. But you’d better behave. I don’t care if I have to hurt you to keep you complacent.” You watched as he pulled at your legs, untying the rope that kept your legs together. You struggled to get up, so he opted to carry you, throwing you over his back. It hurt your eyes to be flooded with color as he carried you to the bathroom. The bath ran and you sat in the warm water, he was watching you as he sat on the toilet cover. The feeling was returning to your body as the water in the filling bathtub lapped against you. “Help...me.” You didn’t want him to touch you, you never wanted to feel his fingers brush against your bare skin. You didn’t trust him, and you never would. Especially not after he did, or tried to do with Jisung. But more than anger, you felt guilt. It was overwhelming, contradictory feelings making your head spin even more. You shuddered as you felt the soap against your back.

“I missed you,” he murmured, “I’ve been searching for you for so long, waited for you so long.”

You swallowed hard, biting your lip as he continued. “I watched you for months. I wanted to take you and carry you away in the night, but I wanted to make him watch. He needed to know you were mine.” You felt hot water pour over your head, the bathtub becoming decorated in a red tint. “I almost gave up, I thought I had lost you completely. But then I saw you with lover boy. I wanted to kill him right there, I wanted to kill everyone but you. He gave a good fight though, beat the shit out of me. But guess who’s dead and who’s got the love?” He laughed at that, massaging something into your hair and picking at the flecks. You felt your wound burn and you moved to cover it, but he slapped your hand away. “Me. I won. You’re all mine, and if I ever see him again. I’ll kill everyone. I’m the only one who loves, okay? Not Jisung, not anyone else. You’re mine.” You heard him murmur that again and again. “I love you, you’re mine, mine.” You brought your knees to your chest, glad that the water hid the fact that you were crying. He didn’t push you to get up though, at least he was that decent. You watched as the red water swirled down the drain. He left and brought a towel, and your dress was clean and pressed. He sat on the toilet cover again, watching in case you wanted to pull something again.

This time you walked, content with being able to feel your weight shift as you walked. You knew this feeling, what it felt like to be completely devoid of basic powers. He led you back to the room, watching the phone in his back pocket. As you entered the room, you took an interest in the flowers. They were beautiful, despite what they meant. It was the only color in the white void of a room, and it mocked you. Your fingers caressed the petals, and the smell was haunting. Your heart was beating again, and you did your best to keep your face blank.

“Aren’t they nice? I got them just for you. You don’t even know what they mean, do you?

“No...tell me.”

“Nah. It’s a secret just for me.”

He moved to set up your ties again, and you got up, legs wobbling with a slight shake as your grip around the black vase tightened. It was now or never. It didn’t happen in slow motion- you knew that wasn’t possible. But you watched as the vase shattered against the back of his head, falling, bursting into tiny pieces as the flowers fell to his feet and he toppled. You knew there was no way he would be down for long, so you fished the phone out of his pockets. You panicked as you ran around the large house, searching for a room to hide in the meanwhile. His phone was locked, but you saw the screen unlock as you typed in your anniversary. You didn’t know where you were, a random room with various boxes. You slide the closet door open, met with the smell of mothballs but you entered anyway. There was a lot of stuff, and you piled things on top of you as you typed Jisung’s number.

It fell to voicemail, and you felt tears well up in your eyes.

“Jisung….it’s me….don’t have time, please...he’s send..ing...someone. Be safe..please...I’m in love.... with you. I’m sorry.”

You ended the call, typing in the emergency number.

“What’s your emergency?”

“I’m trapped...abducted.”

“Do you know where you are?”

“No.”

“Okay, stay calm okay? Please stay on the line as long as you can.”

“Can’t..he’s coming. Oh god, I’m as good...as dead.”

“Can you tell me his name please?”

“_____”

“____, as in the gang leader?”

“Yes.”

“I need you to stay on the line okay. Do you remember where you last were?”

“Boseong, my shop...flower shop..mirror.”

You heard the door slam open and the closet door slide open with a large creak.

“Sweetheart? Are you still there? Sweetheart, stay on the line. Is he in the room-?”

“Caught.”

azaleas: fragility

petunias: your prescense soothes me

globe amaranths: immortality, unfading love

carrot flowers: do not refuse me

asphodel in a black vase: death threat

eglatines: i wound to heal

lemon blossom: fidelity in love

peach blossom: i am your captive

lungworts: thou art my life

phlox: our souls are united, unanimity

alstroemerias: devotion

altheas: consumed by love

arbutus: love only for you

red balsams: touch me not, impatient resolve

yellow balsams: impatience

japanese rose: beauty is your only attraction

jumpers: asylum, aid, protection

kalmias: treachery

[kitty-bandit]

I love hearing about you delinquent au! Can’t wait to read it

How about a sneak peek, Anon? (ﾉ^ヮ^)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Lavi shoved his hands into the front pocket of his sweatshirt. The late September days were still warm, but nights turned surprising cold. He wished he’d brought his favorite scarf as he stood next to the raffle table. Excited shouting came from the packed bleachers, and he looked up just in time to see a few players celebrating in the endzone. He sighed, sitting next to Lenalee in one of the empty folding chairs behind the table. “I should’ve listened to Yuu. This is kinda boring.”

“That’s why I bribed you with food.” Lenalee smiled and greeted another group who stopped at the table. After taking their money and handing them tickets, she turned back to Lavi. “It’s been almost two hours and I am ready to leave.”

“Where is your partner, anyway?” Lavi asked, peeking into the bucket with the ticket stubs.

“Please do not call him that,” Lenalee said, rubbing her temple under the dark purple knit hat she had worn for the night. Her hair was plaited into two pigtail that hung over each shoulder. “He went to get another roll of tickets from the supply closet. We’re almost out.”

With a chuckle, Lavi leaned back in the chair, the metal scraping against the cement sidewalk underfoot. The table was set up near the entrance, close to the ticket booth—specifically placed so no one could miss it as they entered the field. “What is the raffle even for?”

“I thought you could read?” Lenalee teased, pointing the the sign on the table. “We’re giving away a mini fridge. One of the student’s parents donated it.”  As another group of students passed the table, Lenalee smiled and waved.

Lavi’s good eye widened in surprise. “That’s actually not an awful prize.” He leaned forward peering at the sign. “Maybe I should buy a ticket…”

“Five bucks gets you one ticket, twenty gets you five,” Lenalee recited, as she had been all night.

Lavi winced at the prices. “Too rich for my blood.”

“Suit yourself.”

“Speaking of rich, I could go for some of that overpriced food you promised me.” He wiggled his eyebrows at Lenalee, grinning wide.

“And here I was hoping you’d forget.” She shook her head before something caught her eye. “You’re in luck. Link’s back.”

Lavi looked up and spotted the Lenalee’s number two, as it were. The vice president of the student council looked more the part than Lenalee did, and that was an accomplishment. Link’s blond hair was plaited tight and neat, the long braid swinging as he strode towards the table. He looked completely out of place in his dress shirt and sweater combo, especially as he passed another group of students decked out in sweatshirts and jeans. His khakis looked stiffer than his personality.

“This is the last of the tickets,” Link announced, setting the bright red roll to the side. He looked at Lavi, who had stolen his seat, disapproval in his russet eyes.

“That’s fine—there’s barely an hour left in the game and sales have slowed a bit.” Lenalee stood, straightening out her light coat and grabbing her purse from under her chair. “I’m going to take a break. I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

“Fine,” Link replied, taking back his seat as soon as Lavi had vacated it. “Don’t linger. The table really should have two people working it at all times.”

Lena smiled as she bit back a comment. “Of course.” She grabbed Lavi by the elbow and dragged him off towards the bleachers. As soon as they were out of earshot, she sighed, the noise sounding more angry than any breath had the right to be. “He sure has some nerve saying that after he left me there for nearly thirty minutes.”

Lavi didn’t fight her pull, stumbling along next to her as they headed up the steps. “He should really see a doctor about that stick lodged up his ass.”

She managed a quick laugh, her fake smile turning into a genuine one. “If only it wasn’t permanently stuck.” She spotted Kanda and Alma at the top of the bleachers huddled close to each other. When Alma spotted them, they waved, grinning widely.

“You managed to escape!” they said, making room for Lavi and Lenalee on the bench.

“I told Link I would be gone for ten minutes, but I’ll stretch that to thirty.” Lena wrapped her arm around Alma as she sat down, sitting as close as she could to keep warm. “Lavi and I are going to the concession stand. Did you two want anything?”

“Yes. I want to leave,” Kanda grumbled, tucking his chin into the folds of his jacket.

Alma rolled their eyes. “Don’t listen to him. We’re having fun.” They rested their head against Kanda’s shoulder, pink painted lips stretching wide over their face. “Something warm would be nice. It’s colder than I thought it would be tonight.”

“I think we can manage that.” She nudged Lavi, elbowing him in the side. “Ready to get some sub-par, overpriced food?”

“Always.”

They walked back down the metal bleachers, avoiding the crowded walkway and headed to the nearby concession stand. As they stood in line, Lavi checked the menu tacked on the wall next to the small order window and balked at the prices. “Yeesh. Are you sure you can buy stuff for everyone? This is more expensive than I thought.”

She pulled her wallet from her purse and held it up as if she was brandishing a sword. “Komui gave me his credit card for tonight, so we’re living large on chili cheese fries and king sized nachos.”

Lavi grinned, rubbing his hands together as he studied the menu board again. “Now that’s what I like to hear.”

When they reached the order window, Lenalee listed off their choices—hotdogs, chili cheese fries, nachos, and a hot chocolate for each of them. By the time their order was ready, they had their arms full as they precariously balanced each item. Lavi winced as he juggled four hot chocolates in his hands.

“This is the definition of hubris, isn’t it?” he asked, carefully following Lenalee back up the bleachers. Every step was a challenge to keep the chocolate in the too-thin paper cups and off his fingers.

“Don’t talk. You’ll lose your concentration and spill,” Lenalee replied, carefully balancing all of the food in her hands. Her stacking technique was impressive, and Lavi would have congratulated her if he didn’t have to worry about spilling hot cocoa all over himself.

When Alma noticed their burdened states, they hurried down to help with the final leg of the journey. “Ah, careful!” they said, taking two of the cups from Lavi’s hands before heading back up the stairs.

“Why did we pick the highest seats on the bleachers again?” Lavi asked, setting the last two cups on the bench to help Lena distribute the food.

“Because Yuu doesn’t like people sitting behind him,” Alma reminded them, grabbing one of the hotdogs and settling in next to Kanda again.

“So, it’s my fault?” Kanda asked, frowning as he grabbed his hot chocolate from Lenalee and sipped it angrily.

“Hush and eat your nachos,” Lenalee said, pushing the flimsy paper container into his hands. Once the food had been distributed, she sat down, only to sigh again. “I forgot napkins.”

“I’ll get them,” Lavi said, setting his food down on the cool bench and heading down the bleacher stairs. He heard Lenalee’s faint call of ‘thank you’ mixed in with a sudden cheer from the crowd. He looked up at the field again, having missed whatever play had happened to cause the ruckus. He hopped down off the last couple of steps and turned to walk towards the concession stand when something under the bleachers caught his eye.

Just under the bleachers was Allen, reaching into the back pocket of someone’s pants. Lavi watched as Allen slipped their wallet out with ease, pocketing the cash inside, and then returning it as if nothing had happened. He did it again and again, systematically grabbing any wallet or purse within reach and cleaning the money from the billfolds. Lavi stared in awe, watching Allen’s swift, nimble fingers steal hundreds of dollars in cash from the unsuspecting parents watching the football game. That same feeling bubbled up in Lavi’s stomach—the one he’d felt when he’d witnessed Allen pinching those candy bars from the convenience store weeks ago. Nervousness mixed with admiration, and a healthy dose of concern. Lavi had never stolen anything in his life, but watching Allen do it almost felt as if he was an accomplice—too dumbstruck to say anything or try to stop the crime in progress.

As Allen pocketed the last of the cash, he looked up and met Lavi’s frozen gaze. He stiffened for a brief moment before that same smug smile pulled at the corners of his lips. Lavi felt his heart rattle against his chest, cheeks flushed against the cold breeze blowing against them. He didn’t know what to do, and as much as he wanted to run away and forget what he’d seen, his feet were glued to ground, like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming semi.

Then, before Lavi could move or say anything, Allen approached him.

Lavi swallowed, throat tight as he watched Allen close the distance between them. He was wearing that same oversized sweatshirt Lavi had first seen him in, and a black knit stocking cap to hide his shock white hair. Lavi didn’t doubt he’d come to the game for this exact reason—to steal from the crowd. And from what Lavi had seen, it was easy pickings.

Allen stopped just in front of Lavi, looking up at the redhead with a calm smile. He reached up and pressed a finger to Lavi’s lips, his skin cold and chapped from the wind. “This is our little secret, right?”

“I, uh—” Lavi began, lips moving against Allen’s finger. With his stomach tied in knots, Lavi nodded, his heart flipping in his chest and nearly jumping right out of his mouth. “Sure.”

Allen pulled his finger back, his smile softening. He tilted his head, looking Lavi up and down, as if he was assessing something—though the redhead wasn’t sure what. “You’re Lavi, right?”

“Y-Yeah.”

“Thanks.” He winked, brushing past Lavi and merging into a large group of students heading towards the exit. “See you later.”

As Allen disappeared into the crowd, Lavi’s heart continued to beat like a drum in his ribcage. He let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.

What the fuck was that about?

[captaindeanwinchesterforever]

Don’t Leave Me pt. 2

I just want to thank all of you who like to read my writing. I appreciate all the support! I hope y'all like this one. Love you guys!

Pairing: None at the moment *wink wink*

Warnings: some angst, some fluff, and a little bit of cussing

Summary: You are left having to deal with the aftermath of Gabriel’s death, but thank goodness you have a knight in shining armor.

Word count: 2,180

        I pulled into the garage of the bunker and parked my truck beside the Impala. I shut the engine off and sat there a few seconds to collect my thoughts. I got out of my truck and started to open the door to the bunker when I heard laughing and celebrating. It sounded like a fucking party. I was aggravated, but I knew that these people we brought back to this world didn’t kill Gabriel, so I didn’t need to take my anger out on them. I opened the door to see everyone having a great time. There was beer and food, people laughing and smiling at the victory they just had. I couldn’t be a part of the celebration, so I kept my head down and headed straight to my room. I hoped that Dean and Sam wouldn’t notice I was back. As long as I could stay out of their sight, I would be okay.

           “(Y/N)! Wait, please.” I forgot about the angel… I just kept walking, but Cas caught up with me and grabbed my wrist to stop me.

           “Cas, please let go of me.” I didn’t mean to snap at him, but I just couldn’t be in that room anymore.

           “I know you are hurting right now. I just want you to know that I am here for you. I’m sor…” I cut him off.

           “Don’t say it. I don’t need that right now.” I turned and glared at him with anger. My expression went from furious to sorrowful in less than a second.

           “I’m sorry, Cas. I know you’re only trying to help me and be a good friend. I really appreciate you being here for me, but I don’t need anyone’s pity. Just know that I love you and you are one of the most important people in my life. I just need some space right now. I’ll be okay.” I smiled and leaned in and gave him a peck on the cheek. I turned around and made a beeline to my room.

           I walked in and slammed the door behind me. I leaned back against it and slid down to the floor. Tears began to flow from my eyes. I had to put on a good face for the boys, but when I was behind closed doors, I could let everything out.

Sam’s POV

            I looked up when I heard the door open to the bunker. It was (Y/N). She was trying to make her way past everyone, and I assumed that she was making her way to her room. All I wanted to do is comfort her, but I knew how she was, and she wasn’t going to let any weakness show. I heard Cas yell out to her and grab her wrist. I grimaced a little thinking that Cas was about to get decked in the face, but to my surprise she didn’t do anything. I could hear a little bit of their conversation. I heard Cas try to tell her he was sorry, but she cut him off and the look she gave him was terrifying. If looks could kill that one definitely would have. Then I saw (Y/N)’s facial expression change. She regretted what she said to Cas and she said something that I couldn’t hear. She leaned up to Cas’ cheek and gave him a kiss. Then off she went to the only safe place she thought she had left.

           “Cas was real brave grabbing her arm like that.” I looked over and saw Dean standing beside me.

           “Yeah, real brave… I don’t know what to do for her, Dean. I know she wants to be alone, but I can’t just sit here and let her go through this alone. Hell, we both know how it feels to lose someone like that.” I was aggravated with everything going on, but especially that (Y/N) had to lose someone she loved. If I was being completely honest, I was pissed at Gabriel for putting her through this again.

           “I don’t know, Sammy. That’s a bit risky. Don’t get me wrong, I love (Y/N) just as much as the rest of us do but she’s different. She doesn’t like to show weakness. Hell Sam, that was the first time I had ever seen her cry. We’ve all tried to comfort her at some point, and you were able to for a little bit, but we both know that the only one that could calm her down is gone. If you feel like you need to help her then you should do it, but if you do you may not like the answer you get.” Dean has always cautioned me about (Y/N) and how she was, but it’s never scared me away. I know she isn’t like other women and I think that’s why I am drawn to her. I have always had feelings for (Y/N), but she loved Gabriel and I couldn’t live with myself if I ruined that.

           I couldn’t stand there anymore, I had to go help her. I took off through the war room and down the hall way towards (Y/N)’s bedroom. Once I reached her room, I stood there for a second. I could hear something coming from the other side of the door. I put my ear up to it and listened. It was her crying. She was trying to hold her sobs back, but she was failing.

           I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. “(Y/N), it’s Sam. I just wanted to come and check on you. Can I please come in?”

(Y/N)’s POV

I was sitting on the floor sobbing when I heard a knock on my door. It startled me a little bit. I should’ve known that someone would come and find me.

           “(Y/N), it’s Sam. I just wanted to come and check on you. Can I please come in?” Of course, it was Sam. I thought I had slipped past him without him seeing me. I got up off the floor and wiped my eyes. I took a few deep breaths and opened the door.

           “Sam, I’m fine. I just want to be alone right now. I don’t want anyone around me right now. I think its best that you leave.” I felt awful being this hateful towards Sam, but he doesn’t need to see me like this. He definitely didn’t need to waste his time on me. I just wanted him to go celebrate and be happy. I went to close the door in his face, but he stopped it with his hand.

           “(Y/N), I just wanted to come and see how you were doing. You were gone for a while and I was worried. I didn’t know where you had gone.” He was so sincere, but I needed him to leave. I wasn’t worth his time or effort. I wasn’t worth fixing.

           “I appreciate that, but I’m good.” I had an agitated tone in my voice. Even with the hateful tone, he was patient.

           “We could just hang out like we used to. It was fun watching movies and talking to you. We used to talk about anything and everything. I just want to help you.” He was trying so hard to help me. I remember how much fun we used to have after I lost Gabriel the first time. Sam was always there. Through my good days and my dark days. I depended on him a little more than I would’ve liked to admit. My feelings for him started to change and I pushed them down. He wouldn’t want this hot mess. He was just being nice, and Sam deserved a whole hell of a lot better than me. As soon as these feelings started, they disappeared, because that’s when Gabriel came back into my life.

           “I don’t need you to save me again, Sam. I definitely don’t need a babysitter. I’ll be fine.” I sounded like a real bitch. If I didn’t feel bad before, I definitely feel bad now. I could see the annoyed look on his face.

           “(Y/N), listen. I get what you’re going through and I get you want to be alone, but I think being alone is the last thing you need to be right now. All I want to do is help you and all you do is push me away. I see straight through that act you put on for everyone else. I’m your friend (Y/N) and I care about you. So please just let me help you!” Sam had never raised his voice at me before. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. I tried to hold them back, but one fell down my cheek. I saw the regret on Sam’s face for what he did. He started to apologize, but I quickly wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest. He engulfed me in his arms and I finally felt safe again, just like before.

           “I’m sorry, Sam. Can you stay here with me for a little while?” I just wanted his company, nobody else’s just his. Sam shook his head yes and we walked into the room and closed the door behind us.

           Sam and I were laying on our backs staring up at the ceiling of my room. We were just kind of enjoying each other’s company, not really talking until I spoke up.

           “I’m sorry I was so mean to you earlier. I don’t know how to act or feel about what just happened. I want to believe that Gabriel is alive, but I have a gut feeling that he’s actually gone this time. I’m furious with him for doing this to me again, but most importantly I want to kill Michael. I want revenge Sam and I’ve never felt like this before. I’m overwhelmed with all the different thoughts going through my head. What’s even worse is that I have been such an awful friend to you, and you didn’t deserve any of it. Sam, you’re the only one I can be myself with and you have no idea how important that is to me. There are no words to describe how sorry I am to have put you through so much. I don’t deserve to have a friend like you.” I had rolled over on my side facing Sam while I said this. I really didn’t deserve him. The fact he still wanted to help me after I was such a bitch to him made me appreciate him even more. He rolled over to face me and looked at me for a second with his sad puppy dog eyes.

           “(Y/N), you don’t need to be sorry. I don’t blame you for what you said or how you acted. I would have done the same thing. I understand why our friendship changed when Gabriel came back. You loved each other and he had just stepped back into your life. I don’t blame you for wanting to spend all your time with him. You’re very special to me (Y/N) and I just don’t want you to feel like you have to go through this alone. I was there for you then and I am here for you know. I always will be. As for Michael, he isn’t coming back (Y/N). He is stuck in that other world with Lucifer. Where I hope they’ll rip each other apart.” He reached up and tucked some stray hairs behind my ear. I couldn’t help but smile. Sam made me feel safe and he took care of me.

           “Thank you, Sam.” I smiled at him and nuzzled myself up against his body. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. Right before I fell asleep, I heard him whisper something, but I couldn’t quite make out the words.

Sam’s POV

           (Y/N) snuggled herself up to me and I wrapped my arms around her. I missed this so much. I missed the smell of her hair, how warm her body was against mine, the conversations we used to have, but most importantly I missed her. I felt like I could fly. The smile on my face was never going to leave. (Y/N) deserved so much better than what her life has handed her. She was rough around the edges and often put up a wall to keep people out, but under all that she had the most beautiful soul. I had never had feelings like this for any other woman, she was everything to me.

           I could tell (Y/N) was starting to fall asleep, so I pulled her in closer. Her face was buried into the crook of my neck. Her breathing started to slow, and I could tell she had finally fallen asleep. I kissed the top of her head and whispered, “I promise to always take care of you and never leave you. I love you, (Y/N). I always have.”

           I could feel my eyes starting to get heavy. I didn’t want to leave her, so I rested my head on her pillow and drifted off to sleep.

[parksfabray-blog]

Stand By Me | Dominer

Who: @dominicjamesjones, @skypucks, & @pfabray

When: Friday, January 12th 2018

Where: Dom’s place

Notes: Parker goes to Dom’s place confronts him on why he has been distant and she gets heartbreaking news.

Triggers: Death, Alcohol.

Skylar knew that today was important for her to be there for her friend. Granted she didn't feel right about being there, like she didn't feel right be there a year ago. She placed the empty bottles on his counter and walked back into the living room where she came from "Im gonna go, I didn't find anyone to cover my shift, but obviously there's water in your fridge." She said as she fixed her hair as she looked at her friend. "Are you going to be okay if I leave? If not, I can text Parker and Im sure she'll be over here in two seconds."

Dom had been drinking a little bit but wasnt completely wasted, at least not like the night before. Today was a hard day and he wished he could just fast forward it all. He didn't want to feel it anymore. That loss the day his grandpa died. He was sitting on the couch and the one person that he called but shouldnt have was Skylar. She was the only one that understood. She was there that night when he got the call from his mother. He didn't even get to say goodbye. "It's fine" he shook his head. "You can go if you want I'll be fine" he stood up and felt dizzy a bit. "I'll walk you out." he said nodded towards the front door of his new house. Dom blinked slowly and he moved towards the door. "Thank you." he spoke. "For being here. I'm sorry I'm a mess."

Skylar slowly nodded. "Alright." She said softly and watched him stood up. "You dont have to, its fine." She followed him towards the door and stopped as she looked at him. "Not a problem, we're friends now right? Nah, no need to apologize. Really, you're allowed to grieve and work through your grief." She gave him a small smile before she gave him a hug. "Now, call that girl of yours." She gave him a knowing look and opened up the door. She started to walk and stopped before she turned to face him. "I mean it Dom. She needs to know."

Dom hugged her back briefly and he walked her outside. "I know I know. I'll tell her." He nodded. Dom paused as they were outside and he leaned over and pulled her into another hug. "Thanks again. I just..needed someone you know." He watched her leave and as he walked back inside he got his phone out to text Parker. -hey, so i need to talk to you about that thing that I told you i wanted to talk to you about. can you come over?- He pressed send and starred at his phone waiting for a response.

Parker was glad that Avery's regular babysitter was able to watch her, since she couldn't help but think about what was going on with Dom. She didn't want Avery to worry about her. She slipped her hands into her dress pockets as she paced back and forth, waiting to hear something from him since he ghosted, kind of anyways. "Fuck it." She grabbed her keys, grabbed her phone and headed over to his new place. She made sure that her door was locked and headed over to his place. Parker felt her heart dropped when she saw Skylar leaving his place and hid some bushes when she saw him outside with her. Was it the thing he wanted to talk to her about? She couldn't believe this was happening, nothing was making any sense. She poked her head above the bush and saw him pulled her into a hug. No, no. This was insane. She felt her phone vibrate a bit later and pulled it out. She stood up once she knew that Skylar was gone and headed up to his front door. -I'm at the front door.- She pressed sent, pocketed her phone and felt her blood boiling.

Dom sat up straight on the couch when Parker texted back so quickly. That was fast. He frowned and then went to the front door. He was a little tipsy but not drunk drunk. Not like she's seem him before. He opened the door and smiled. "Hi" he said. "What did you do run over here?" he asked a little sad chuckle came from his lips. He let her inside. "I'm sorry its still a mess. I havent had the motivation to unpack just yet" Dom wasn't in his usual chipper mood and for good reason. But Parker seemed upset maybe? "Is everything okay?" he asked.

Parker took a couple of breaths as she tried to control her emotions and looked up when she heard him open up the door. "Hi." She said softly and shook her head. "No, I was actually on my way over here." She looked at him, knowing that he was tispy and swallowed hard when she heard the chuckle. She shut the door behind her then moved into the living room, liking the place better than her own and closed her eyes. "No, um. I need to know if Skylar and you are back together because I refuse to be that girl who had high hopes of us getting back together when apparently she's over here and how much have you drink? Because if you're going to be drinking again, then Avery's not going over here until you're sober a.and I wont be with you if you're heavily drinking again and." She rolled her eyes at herself since her nerves got the best of her.

Dom frowned. "What?" he was so confused and Parker seemed so upset. He knew that telling her what he wanted to know was going to break her heart. "Im sorry, I'm sorry" he walked towards he and put his hands on her shoulders. "I'm not with Skylar. I'll explain okay. Just let me explain. I had a couple drinks I know I'm sorry. I just...today is a hard day." he couldn't help it when the tears started to fall from his eyes. He shook his head and sat down on the couch. "I don't want to tell you. Because I don't want you to feel the way I'm feeling right now and how I felt this way last year." he was almost balling now. "You might want to sit down" he said as he looked up at her.

Parker looked at him before she let out a breath and rested her head. "Thank god or I mightve done something stupid. Im sorry, Im sorry." She said. She looked up to see tears rolling down his cheeks, making her on the verge of tears and wiped them from his cheeks. "Baby, what's going on." She sat down next to him and rubbed his back. "Hey, whatever it is, we can work through it together as a team." Her head was spinning in all kinds of different directions now.

Dom shook his head. "I shouldve told you last year. But we werent in a good place and I didn't know how. I didn't want to break your heart again. I just couldnt." he swallowed thickly. "Grandpa passed away last year. Exactly one year ago today." He looked at her and he started to cry again. "Im sorry I didn't tell you. I just couldn't." he shook his head. "Skylar was with me when I found out. We were trying to be friends. Like actual friends and this whole week when the anniversary was coming up I panicked and she came over. We're jsut friends kinda of...not really. It doesnt matter though and I'm just so sorry."

Parker furrowed her eyebrows again as she rubbed his arm and stopped when she heard that grandpa passed away. "No." She said as she stood up, taking a deep breath and started to cry as she walked away from him. "No, not grandpa. H-How?" She swallowed hard as she tried to focus on him and sat down as she couldnt focus on him anymore. Her grandpa, the one family member who adopted her into the family. The other person she wanted to see while they were in Ohio, was gone. She buried her face in her hands as she bawled, feeling heartbroken and wasn't for sure what to feel. Between hearing that grandpa Jones was gone, the fact that Skylar was with him when he found out and the fact that she had been with him this whole week. She wasn't only grieving one death and heartbroken because of losing grandpa jones, but she was heartbroken to learn that Dom had kept this from her and had his ex there instead of her. The supposed be the love of his life, the mother of his child. "I-I don't care, you should've told me that he was gone, Dominic. I would've been there despite being in a bad place, not her." She looked up at him. "H-He was my grandpa too a..and now he's never going to meet his great granddaughter because of me and how selfish I was when it came to keeping her a secret from you guys." She let out a shaky breath as she rubbed her hands on her shorts and sniffed as she gotten up. "Do you have anymore alcohol?"

Dom hated to see her cry because it made him cry in return. He shook his head. "I know I know I should have. I'm sorry Parks. I'm so sorry" He frowned and shook his head. "You did what you thought was best and I should have told you. I didn't want to hurt you again. I didn't mean for Skylar to be there. I didn't want her to be there but she was and I can't change that. I can't change any of this and I just...I'm sorry." he took a deep breath and looked up at her as she stood. "Yeah in the kitchen." he said.

Parker "No, I didn't. Its obvious I didn't. Between two years ago and now, I didn't make the right choice." Parker said as she looked at him and shook her head before she let out a bitter chuckle. She walked into the kitchen, grabbed whatever she could find and took a swig of it. It had been years since she had straight alcohol, but she needed it. She spotted some whiskey, drank some and put the lid on it as she swallowed it. She could feel herself kind of tispy, but she wanted more. More to numb the pain. She grabbed the bottle, sat down in front of the couch and took the cap off of it before she took a drink from the bottle.

Dom watched her walk off to the kitchen and when she came back he looked over at her. They sat on the couch in silence for a long time. It felt like forever. He reached over to hold her free hand. He said silent not really knowing what to say. What could you say at a moment like this? He already apologized and explain. He felt horrible. He didn't want her to feel the same and here she was drinking on his couch, a place he never thought she would be.

Parker sniffed as she licked the whiskey from her lips and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand that held the bottle to get the rest of it off of her lips. "Was the funeral nice?" She finally asked softly as she looked at him and looked back ahead after she put the cap back onto the bottle. "I take it that she went with you there too?" She shouldnt be like this, but she was distraught, heartbroken and not knowing what else to say.

Dom frowned. "I wouldn't know. I didn't go" he said looking down at his lap and away from her. He couldnt look back at her and see the hurt in her eyes. "This week was the first time I talked to Skylar since last year.. Is that what you are really upset about here? That she was there and not you?" he asked finally looking over at her and shaking his head.

Parker glanced over at him and pulled her hand out of his hand before she placed the cap onto the bottle. "I honestly don't give a damn about Skylar now. I was a little upset at the fact that she was there and not me, but right now Im really upset at the fact that you didn't tell me that grandpa jones passed away when it happened. Im really upset at the fact that you chose to keep that information from me and I get that why, because you're in the grieving process and sure we were in a bad place, but I would've put that to the side to be there for you because I knew how much he meant to you and to your family." She swallowed some as she looked at him. "You didn't want to open up to me right away and wanted to wait to tell me. I get that, I do but dom. We're trying to be a couple again but we can't when one of us closes the other one off." She placed the bottle onto the floor and looked at him. "Your issues are my issues, your problems are mine. Your loses are mine." She swallowed hard as she studied him and shook her head. "We cant be Dom and Parks if we don't tell each other things. If we don't then we're going to end back in the place when we broke up the first time. And I am glad that she was there for you, because at least one of us were and is there for you."

Dom shook his head. “Really because it seems like oh do when you’re passive aggressive with me about her.” Dom stood up. “I told you why I didn’t tell you and yeah maybe it wasn’t the right thing to do but you have no right to blame me for not telling you when you kept a big ass secret from me for two years. It’s just as worse and hypocritical.” He shook his head. “I don’t want to fight with you today parker. Not today. I just can’t. I’m sorry and I’ll say sorry over and over again as much as you want me to but I can’t change it.” He had so much more that he wanted to say but he just couldn’t. It was exhausted and felt like before they broke up when they fought all the time. He looked at the floor. “I’m sorry,” He said quietly with sadness in his voice. He could feel himself starting to cry again.

Parker shook her head when he apologize. "No, don't be. You have a point. Im the one who should be sorry." She whispered after she let everything that he had said settled in and sat away from him. She wasn't for sure what else to say, so she stood up, grabbed the bottle of whiskey and placed it on the counter. She quietly found a box that was marked glasses, grabbed two and filled them with water after she washed them. She placed a glass for him in front of him and sat down where she was at and placed her glass next to her. "I think you should stay with Avery and I, I don't want you staying here by yourself. If you want, that is. Im not going to force you to stay with me though. I'll sleep on the couch and you can sleep in the bed."

Dom took the glass from her and he took a big gulp. He closed his eyes and ran his hand over his head. “Okay.” He agreed. “No it’s okay I don’t want to be alone tonight.” He moved behind the couch and put his hand on her shoulder. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “I’ll pack a bag.”

Parker nodded. "Okay." She spoke softly. She closed her eyes when she felt his hand on her shoulder and bit down on her bottom lip as she stopped a sob from escaping. She nodded again as she grabbed her water, took a drink, placed it next to her and pulled her knees close to her chest. She let out a shaky breath as she placed her hands on the back of her neck and rested her forehead against her knees. She knew that they would be back where they were because of her and they didn't that. Especially when there was their daughter now.

Dom went to his bedroom and packed a small bag of clothes. He moved back out to the living room seeing parker crawled up in a little ball. He frowned and moved quickly beside her. “Parks.” He said her name and pulled her into a tight hug. “Come here.” He spoke.

Parker wrapped her arms around him and stuffed her face into the crook of his neck. "Im so sorry." She whispered, knowing that she had a plan to take their family to visit grandpa Jones now.

Dom held her close and rubbed her arm reassuringly. “It’s ok” He whispered. “It’s gonna be okay.” He held her close for a while and pulled away slowly. He looked at her and touched her cheek. “I’m sorry too.”

Parker felt him rubbed her arm and let out a shaky breath. She sniffed as she nodded against him, wiped away some of the tears before she looked at him and shook her head. "You dont have to be sorry." She gave him a small smile and looked at him.

Dom looked down at her and he nodded. "Yeah I do" he kissed her forehead and pulled her closer. "Who's watching Avery right now?" he asked. He didn't want to walk in all crying and stuff with some babysitter he didn't know.

Parker shook her head. "No because you had a point." She whispered as she closed her eyes when he kissed her forehead and rested her head on his shoulder. "Her regular babysitter, Monica that watches her during the week and she's over there at her house." She swallowed some as she let out a breath.

Dom nodded. "You wanna get into bed and just watch movies all night and get a big tub of ice cream?" he asked. "Like we used to? Order pizza then?" he asked. Dom wanted to distract himself from the day. And he knew she probably needed it as well.

Parker sniffed as she nodded and stayed close to him. "Yeah and I'll tell Monica that Avery can stay there tonight. She has a daughter who's Avery's age and I don't want her to see us like this. Not yet." She closed her eyes as she licked her lips and listened to his heartbeat.

Dom nodded. "Yeah me either." he took a break. "You wanna just stay here for a little while then" he said as he kept her in his arms. He didn't want to let go. Ever. He wished he could keep her safe and stop all the hurting she was feeling right now because he knew how it felt. He was feeling it too.

Parker "Yes please." Parker replied as she rubbed his arm the best she could do and closed her eyes. She stayed quiet for a while before she opened up her eyes and looked around the best she could. "By the way, when we do order pizza, you're gonna answer the door."

Dom nodded. "i can do that." he smiled. "Lets go back over to your place yeah?" he asked. Dom stood up and he reached out his hand for her to take. He helped her up and kept her hand in his as he picked up his overnight bag. He walked out the front door with her and they walked down the road hand and hand towards Parker's.

[julucid]

Feb 18'18 / F8 / Room - Net - Clay

we were stuck, held captives in a room. i dont understand the situation, since there's no real danger, or maybe the thing just didnt show me any at this part of the dream. but we were scared. scared enough not to dare attempt anything. we never saw the outside since the windows were covered with heavy curtains, but it wasnt barred off or covered up with wood so it was basically just down to us not even wanting to touch the windows. i dont understand this dream since as obedient as we were of all these unspoken rules, we beat the shit out if the guy keeping us there. i want so badly to describe him but i cant picture anything human at this point. the last thing i remember about him was that he didnt do anything to harm us and he didnt seem physically threatening. i still cant see a person. idk what happened but we had a chance, and we managed to subdue him or maybe he was sleeping and i kinda feel like he was pretending to be helpless too. like hes just letting us try for the fuck of it to laugh at us. and we turn him into jelly. idk how. but if you reverse the process, he's back into his "harmful" form, which is a handful of beans----jellybelly candy lmao.

i shouldve written this down when i woke up earlier, this and the two other dreams (now fragments :c) but i woke up from a nightmare and i tried to deal with it like all the usual nightmares, try to forget it instantly. and i especially didnt want to touch this fucking recent one cause it had a similar theme as the last log, and its something to do with Glenn dying. and i still dont know how my dreams work whether or not they're just that, passing dreams, or fucking next level warnings, i dont even want to fucking figure that shit out. but its been mostly of him in his younger self too. idk if i should feel better for that.

the guy i heard him laughing but it wasnt clear, like it was just an echo in my head. and we already melted him down to liquid jelly, and i think we screwed up and missed a step or did it in a wrong time. and we were panicking cause we didnt know what else to do and sooner or later he would come back and idk its back to feeling vulnerable.

//// ////

im in a different room, i could see the outside now. theres dust all over the furniture and some of them smelled musty and looked like they were rotting, so i thought i was in an abandoned building. by the look its surroundings, i guessed a factory. i was with someone else i didnt know who it was at first, it all happened so fast. theres been so much that happened before this and i know we were just escaping, so i thought it was somehow connected to the first dream.

i looked outside the window with broken glass shards stuck to it and i saw young glenn, with a bunch of other kids. they look like they were in 2nd grade elementary. they were in a building were the walls werent there---maybe it was unfinished, or it was in the middle of getting torn down. they were in one of those rooms without a wall, and the only thing keeping them from falling was this metal thing. it looks like a bug screen except the squares "holes" were as big as the volleyball net square spaces. so they were all pressing their faces against it. idk what they were trying to achieve but the kids were pushing outwards by slamming their bodies against the metal screen. i didnt like the way they did it with no expressions on their faces, as if they meant to get hurt. and glenn didnt seem like he wanted to do the same thing--they surrounded him, keeping him trapped in the very middle, the first to fall. and they did fall. i saw the screen bend and bend until whatever it was keeping it nailed on to the building gave in.

i dont know how i was able to see this as if i had a telescope aimed at them, but once they fell, it zoomed back out and i couldnt see what was going on. but i did know that they didnt hit the ground. SOMEHOW, the metal screen caught them all hanging in the air. but what terrified me is that they all stopped moving, and i swore i saw their skin changed to a darker purple.

next thing i know ive already crawled out another broken window, my clothes were torn and there was a wet feeling on the side of my stomach. the guy that was with me was already ahead, idk how he got out before me when i was through the window first. we were in the second floor of the building and there was this wall we had to climb down. on the top of it were these barbed wires, but they had a weird look to them. they were white, not shiny silver, and for some reason we knew they werent sharp but mere elastic plastic. he went through first, going under 2 layers of barb wires. and thats when i noticed his face, its GLENN but he was his current age now. i didnt think about it too much and just followed. i thought climbing through the wires would take longer so i just took a hoodie that i didnt even know i had. put it it on top of the wires and let my body sit on it and just fall down. the wires bended like rubber like i knew it would. and i was on the floor. its a busy street. i saw a couple of people in the distance and i was crying now. i couldnt even talk i kept yelling help me help me as best as i could with my sharp breaths. they were laughing and was caught off guard and they hesitated and i never really saw them get up to move. but i knew that they wouldve figured it out too late. i saw the building that the younger glenn and the kids were still hanging lifelessly. they were so far. so so so far and my knees were already tired. i felt my breathing slow down and i thought my heart stopped beating as well. i didnt know i was still saying help me repeatedly and i forced myself to wake up.

//// ////

i dont remember falling back asleep cause i know i woke up hearing glenn laughing, probably playing fortnite but i know i wouldnt have dared to go back to sleep after that shit

im outside i didnt get the chance to look around and observe since i was busy. i think its a school function since everyone was wearing black uniforn and i wore a long pleated skirt with a button up shirt. theres an event going on, everyone else is outside and they're all crowded up where theres hardly any space to see where you're walking. i was in the very edge of that group, surrounded by a smaller seperate group of people. im sitting down and theres a small, low, square shaped table in front of me. the stool was pretty short too so everyone around me, towered over, blocking the sun light. i couldnt tell if i was selling, or just showcasing my stuff, but i had these clay art. i think they were also edible cause i remember thinking of them as cookies--but they looked like normal playdo consistency. they were neon colored and i remember them mostly being circle and rectangle shaped, size of playing cards, flat, but the designs were like tiny paintings. the first portion of the dream was pretty calm, i forgot what happened with the other dreams and i was even almost entirely happy. i saw familiar faces from school and people i havent talked to in a while, and we chatted like we were actually catching up with our irl lives through the dream.

after i while it was time to pack up. and i think i was either giving away the rest for free, or selling them for sale to finish up fast. but not even 5 minutes after i just finished saying that, theres already been a handful of people from the crowd who snatched them up and left without even awknowledging me. i got so mad that i ended up throwing a tantrum in ways that could only be possible in dreams, i was flipping cars that werent there and i think i even had a full tub of popcorn in my hand idk how tf it got there or why there were even any and i was just throwing the popcorn at peoples faces. i was cursing everyone forgot what i said by now lmaooo but i remember the feeling of my throat, punching out each and every one of those words. and i think it was along the lines of whats the point, like why did i even take the time to make those clayartcookies and then just left the rest on the table.

the end parts of the dream was me walking away crying-- couldnt even see shit in front of me so i found myself walking up the stairs (it was like a floor of a neighborhood streets and above is even more neighborhood streets?) and this one guy that was in the group saw everything and was trying to cheer me up. he kept on going on and on, and i dont know why he didnt give up. half of the dream was me listening to him try to re-motivate me or just to get a smile out of me. i got so guilty that he was putting up so much effort in the dream---it mustve only lasted a moment irl, but it felt like hours of him walking up the stairs with me. i just woke up cause that was the only i knew he would stop and be free lmao.