#which also don't work nearly as well
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Look, I'm talking about diaper changes here. Specifically about factors that make them unpleasant. (Yes, we all know that the answer is "using disposables", but I'm being more specific.) You may well want to scroll past.
I will preface this by saying that yes, I know that commenting on public stuff on Facebook is a horrible idea, but sometimes the stupid is just too strong. The number of parents who think that changing cloth diapers is grosser than changing disposable ones was impossible to ignore. (If you are washing your own I will entertain the argument that you find having to deal with the disposable diaper garbage less gross than the diaper laundry, yes.)
But what gets me is that there are apparently large numbers of parents who not only don't dump diapers into the toilet (confession time: I've pretty much never done that, because when the change table in the airport washroom is located poorly, that's just not happening), they are unaware that that's what you're supposed to do. Not just "wait, you're supposed to do what?" but "that's stupid, why would anyone do that?". And yes, the follow-up wasn't "why would someone go to that much bother" but "why would they tell you to do it"
Can we maybe, as a society, agree that keeping biohazards out of the dump is a good thing?
#this isn't getting into the fact that disposable diapers are incredibly gross#I've used them#They don't wipe baby bums at ALL#you have to rely on the wipes#and if you're using disposable diapers you're going to be using disposable wipes#which also don't work nearly as well#and I know it's technically not the diaper change#but why would anyone want to use a diaper style#that results in diaper blowouts being a regular occurrence?#maybe they just listened to their parents#before modern diaper covers#and didn't realise that diapers work better now#so you don't need to deal with monthly blowouts#I didn't even carry a change of clothes in the diaper bag#because it simply wasn't needed
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can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest
like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!
#me.txt#jjba#i'm going to ramble in tags actually. excuse me#ok. rereading sdc and so confused at the general perception of jotaro and his friends/family. he's not NEARLY as flat or as dickish#i understand that the anime (particularly the dub) tends to slander him but even then he still clearly cares for them! i'm confused#i also understand that a lot of people dig against jotaro and kakyoin as a dynamic because 'they're popular' and that generally disliking#popular things across media is a thing that i've seen consistently everywhere but the discredit to them simply as a DUO and not even as a#pairing is so..... odd..... like they're considered to be a duo that clicks for a reason. i enjoyed them even before i got into the fandom#every time i see someone say jotaro is overrated/dull i take a shot and assume they're an anime-only or only read the manga like once btw#joseph and jotaro also have a neat dynamic and they obviously both love and care for each other. like they're not going to go around loudly#or anything but literally the entirety of the lovers and the prelude to the dio fight IS jotaro being worked up over joseph getting hurt#equally i don't know if it translates to the anime as much but joseph is VERY complimentary when it comes to jotaro. like he sings his#praises so often and reminds everyone that he's his grandson so frequently (d'arby the gamer is a good example of this). either way it's so#peculiar....... there's not enough avdol and jotaro content btw (also in canon) because jotaro obviously looks up to him and avdol jokes#around with him on the occasion they interact after their intro which doesn't start very well. it's very cute#i do think an important thing to note about jotaro's character is how he acts AFTER his intro because he's so drastically different. early#jotaro and later jotaro aren't the same character and i do not mean this in a character development way. excluding the jail incident he's#completely different and probably shouldn't really be taken into account (especially considering the amount of slapstick in araki's intros)#and i think that's really???? what people center on for his character? Which sucks balls bad!#anyways. i could ramble more about this if asked i have so much to say but sigh. jotaro cares so much for his friends and family he's not a#flat fully cold asshole character regardless of whether you watch the anime or ova or read the manga. you just have poor media literacy#i wouldn't recommend watching solely the anime for his character though. the dub also changes a lot so it's... questionable#i love the anime and it's still important for him though. also adds neat stuff. i need to stop myself. i have many thoughts on the matter#jotaro kujo#joseph joestar#noriaki kakyoin#adding in case anyone sees: i am not saying that he is perfect about this. in fact he is very ass about it with jolyne and holly and that's#very important. he also is in fact an asshole sometimes. NOT as much as you guys are making him though!#please don't get me started on how much of a dick etc people make kakyoin to veer away from the 'woobified' characterizations of him#in fact i think that's bad if not worse because it CLAIMS to be in character. hes a prim asshole at times but not that angry or dishevelled
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THE AKUDAMA DRIVE STAGE PLAY IS NOW AVAILABLE!!!!!
#akudama drive#rave ramblees#I included every file as well as photos of everything included#unfortunately the booklet was on shiny paper so perfect photos could not be achieved#getting auto generated subtitles didn't work so we're all just gonna have to learn japanese and cry about it#I wish i had access to lofter to go share this around the chinese community#I'm working on finding a site I can upload a torrent to lest my link get copyright striked#nyaasi unfortunately closed guest uploads and registrations so i'm trying for 1337x#yk i've been working on this since yesterday and like#i haven't actually WATCHED any of it yet#yall get to see it before i do because i have to go work soon#side note but while it was hard to find exact numbers online on the length of the play#i got numbers around 90 minutes#THIS IS NEARLY 3 AND A HALF HOURS LONG W H A T#and there seems to be two different showings recorded#there's also like 3 backstage interviews which are...absolutely worthless without subs#this play better be good even if i don't understand a single word of it#i paid so much for this T_T#everyone better spread this link around so the 10 people in the fandom can enjoy it#also worship and appreciate me please i worked so hard to get this 🥺#maybe also send me $200 too <3
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Got all excited last night bc i saw a post from a mod on the gta o subreddit abt the Halloween update being set to drop today around 5 AM (backed up by at least two gaming websites that had stories also stating the same start time and date)
Went in today ready for Halloween and uh. Nothing lol
Checked the actual Rockstar website and there's no mention of it, just that RDR o is getting a Halloween update this week
If i was a betting man I'd start a pool on how late in the month it'll be by the time the gta Halloween drops lmao
(also a pool on how likely it is the mod is lying; as they continue to insist they have access to all the usual Halloween stuff in GTA o today and that everyone who doesn't must not know how to restart their game to see if that changes anything, or maybe they didn't click play on GTA but a different game in their library? Which is insulting af, especially to the guy with the flare that shows he's at a level so high in the game that i frankly didn't know existed, who called them out and asked if maybe they didn't get confused and thought gta and rdr were both getting the update at the same time. Person was nice abt it, just asked plainly and said it was ok if that was the case, but that it would be helpful for others to know. poor dude immediately got piled on by the mod for it but like. he's right lmao. if that's the case it's fine! mistakes happen! but stop insisting you have access to something seemingly no one else trying to play online does!)
#text post#none of this matters but the depression is eating me alive today so I'm in a shit mood (trying to work myself out of it tho)#and admittedly was excited for the update#i like the Halloween one even more than the xmas one tho i love driving in the snow in game#i even set a notif on my calendar for today abt it like an idiot lmao#last time an update like this was late i couldn't get it work until nearly the last week of the event#so. guess I'll just hope i can maybe play any of the Halloween stuff before the month is over and they remove it#if it makes it in at all this year tbh bc clearly ppl are still trying to fuck with their servers#i can tell bc even tho i can get into online most times now the actual game is acting real fucky lmao#watched a crowd of NPCs walk into the sea#found another one walking in tight circles in the underground bit of the subway/train tunnels#he then dissipated as he walked into a concrete wall which ngl. that creeped me out lol so i got some accidental Halloween stuff#but uh. they don't normally do shit like that nor does my motor bike usually disappear from betwixt my legs#as I'm mid huge jump and literally in the air#spoiler alert: I did not successfully complete that stunt jump but the hospital fixed my guy up#wish my bike would come back from wherever in the shadow realm it went now. just bought it and really liked it too#anyway im gonna have some floor time and work on laundry i guess bc my brain is like#'well if the update isn't up then you have no reason to play. why not throw yourself in a deep pit instead?'#but i got laundry to do and work tonight so the pit will have to wait#(also goddamn it I'm sticking around to check on that fucking update even tho I'm almost definitely wasting my time)
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also shoutout to the hospital for sending us a bunch of PDFs with information about preparing for surgery and what to expect, except the information was all generic stuff where most of it does't actually apply to wisdom tooth removal, so I had a huge panic attack where I nearly threw up because a bunch of the stuff mentioned in there is extremely triggering for us, only to then find out that stuff literally doesn't apply anyway, but now I feel like I have even less of an idea of what to actually expect because it's so hard to figure out which information does apply
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#posts made on pain meds#emetophobia tw#the thing is one of the PDFs is actually specifically for us and has our name in the file name and has been edited to be the right info#but it's only for one specific thing while all the other information about what to expect is just generic stuff#which makes it even more confusing because it gives the impression that it's all specific to this surgery when it isn't#also it's 13 fucking PDFs and we're supposed to read through all of them#but I managed to skim over like 2 paragraphs from one of the generic ones before I started panicking so hard I nearly threw up#(I tried to read the others while already panicking and you can imagine how this went)#it would be nice if people could fucking communicate with us clearly about what's going on#instead of whatever the fuck this is because now we've had multiple instances of being confused as fuck because nobody explained shit#and also if medical professionals could actually fucking understand how medical trauma works and maybe work with us#to figure out how to make this less distressing so we don't have to keep dealing with panic attacks like this#we're not freaked out by the procedure itself. it's a bunch of the other stuff around it that probably doesn't seem like a huge deal#a lot of it feels very dehumanising and like we don't get a say in what people do to us#and there are lots of little things you can do to make us feel less like we're in control and less like we're being dehumanised#but nobody does that and they don't seem to get why certain stuff would be distressing#also the kind of panic attacks we have with this are ones where we don't seem to be able to calm ourselves down#we literally have to use the ''shove an ice cube/something really spicy in your mouth'' trick when we have them#because our brain will not fucking stop and then we spend the next couple of hours really dazed and struggling to process anything#and obviously I don't fucking want that to happen in a hospital because nobody is gonna handle that well#I'm concerned the nurses won't understand how dissociation works and will keep refusing to let us go home#because of us being really spaced out and woozy from the dissociation because they'll assume it's from the sedation instead#when going home would be the thing that would help us stop being so spaced out because we'd be leaving the triggering environment
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it's craaazy crazy for me to hear about people sorting fics by kudos in descending order or filtering out anything below 50k words or anything else that vastly slims down your selection cause i have been in a fandom now for nearly a year that has, for my character of choice, a grand total of 1200 fics that have been written over the course of a decade. i have at least clicked on every single one that he plays more than a bit part in, and i bet i've reread like half of them. some people donj't know they're fucking born i swear
#but katie why don't you just get into another wrestler so you could read more fics you ask#well it doesn't WORK like that. except it actually does. but guess what i also already read nearly all the seth rollins fic.#and at least 2/3 of it is smut. which is great and all but i am still an asexual it's only ever going to do so much for me
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and if all the people who told you one day it won't hurt all the time and there will be a sunny day and you will be able to notice how beautiful it is were right. what then.
#the number of times over the last week I've nearly burst into tears because I realized I was experiencing joy untempered by sadness!#for the first time in so so long! It's over two years since I've been this at peace!#only by the grace of God am I still here at all#and I don't know I guess I just got used to being miserable but now I'm getting reacquainted with joy.#she's a good and loyal friend and I've missed her dearly.#I think the most peace I've known was on Sunday#It was the two year anniversary of the single worst day of my life#And two years out....I didn't feel like mourning. There's still a sense of loss but what God has given me instead is so much better.#I'm in such a better place mentally and emotionally and even physically with just being safe and being in school and doing well in classes#And I have friends I trust and love and who love me and a balance of work and rest that I never thought I'd have#And in class today we were talking about generalized anxiety disorder which I believe I used to have and...probably don't anymore#Like I used to spend so much time and energy just worrying and then also trying to avoid anxiety attacks and I just...don't anymore#It's been such a slow process and there are of course good and bad days and weeks but overall my brain has healed so much#and realizing that was wild#on healing
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My mother is threatening to put the house up for sale (again) and it's happened so many times that I can't tell if she's actually going through with it or not
#she's wanted to leave my father for over a decade now but it's nearly 2025 and that hasn't materialized in any way#which i get bc the economy is rough and living here is only getting more expensive#my brother doesn't make enough to provide a stable income and I'm struggling to find a job i can actually do#staying with my father is the only way we've been managing to stay stable#and i also get why she wants to leave him#they don't work well together#even when they're getting along there's just something off#and lately my mother's been having a midlife crisis so she feels like she's running out of time to finally be free#i just hate the uncertainty#i have no clue whether she's actually serious this time or if she's making me stressed over nothing#it was a miracle we were even able to get this house#it was during the pandemic so my parents got a good deal on it#but now it's another thing keeping them from splitting up and now i have to live in the tension#ideally i would've wanted to live on my own by now but that's not in the cards for me rn#I'd be lying if i said i couldn't relate to feeling stuck and feeling the time melt away#idk#idk what I'm going to do
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whyyyyyy am i waking up with heartburn the only snack i had before bed this time was a GRANOLA BAR
#i didn't even eat any beef or arbys!!!! i had cereal for dinner!!!!!! what!!!!!!#i have to eat a horrible heartburn relief chewable :[ its cherry flavored i dont like cherry but the only other flavour they had was mint :#and mint will Hurt Me so i have to put up with horrible horrible cherry powdery chewable tablet#i would 10000000% prefer a pill :[ or even better a liquicap/gelcap style pill since they're Slippery and don't get stuck in my throat#i never Choke on pills (yet) but they tend to get stuck just past my airway so i can still breathe easy but can't swallow#especially if they're super powdery pills like pepto#but the pepto liquicap style pills are fucking MASSIVE which i can't do either that's just too big#apparently my AMPS can affect my ability to swallow properly i guess? and Yeagh it has been getting worse with the rest of my symptoms#I've had to try Thick Water which helps force the pill down if it does get stuck#or a small snack will do the trick as well like just a little bite of food will push the pill down#but i don't always have easy and quick to swallow foods on hand when I'm taking meds#i Might also put up with dissolvable tablets but the only one i really use like that is my prescription zofran so#and that is The Only grape flavor i will ever stand solely bc it actually works within like 10 minutes#so i will put up with the Taste for such immediate nausea relief#zofran my beloved (only nausea pill that REALLY combats my million undiagnosed issues)#ough i finally ate the horrible cherry tablet and it was twice as bad as i expected i nearly gagged that was awful i fucking hate cherry#it tasted like sadness and chalk
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according to Doctor Google it is possible to bruise just from overexerting a muscle, tho almost every result mentions an "extreme workout" of some sort
meanwhile i just went from being very sedentary to standing/walking 35ish hours a week (customer service job) and yesterday noticed a band of bruising on both upper-mid thighs. i was like huh i must have banged them against something and not noticed. well today the bruising has spread up and around the side, on both legs it's an area around the size of my hand that looks lightly bruised. like... should i be concerned about this?? the fuck😭
#i don't have any condition that causes easy bruising afaik except type 1 diabetes#what's weird also is it's my lower thighs which FEEL most sore#but no visible bruising in that area at all#aphelion.txt#actually chronically ill#< ?? idk if this is related to my t1d or any other health condition but feels like the right place to put this post#this is the end of my 1st week on the job#hopefully my legs will get used to it soon bc oww#i've had fairly high muscle tension due to chronic stress (??) the past couple years also#and once the muscles get tight it can take dayss for them to relax#ive recently started to get muscle aches and muscle tension in the upper thighs as part of my period too which didnt used to happen#and it can take like nearly a week for the extra tension to go away#and in that situation (as well as this one since i started working)#i can feel the muscle like. spasm while it's trying to relax#asked my dr about that (the period related part) and she was like its an unusual symptom but not in itself concerning#this bruising tho........ fuckin weiiird
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y'know that post that's like everyone's got their special super power or whatever, it might just look a little different from the super hero movies? right?
yeah my bio family's version of that is Impeccably Bad Timing
#well i *was* excited for a meet up tomorrow#and i still am don't get me wrong it's just#slightly tainted currently by the fact that my family just...#trying to explain to my sister where i'm at with our parents feels like a hopeless endeavor and i just really do not feel like hashing it o#at 10pm on a Monday when the purpose of her reaching out was to give me the information i might need about grandpa's funeral#which i have already decided i will not be attending but i acknowledge that i did not notify my dad of receipt of his messages#and therefore he has no idea if i even got the relevant information he was trying to do the right thing and give me#even if he did it stupid and bad#i'm...frustrated by the situation i've ended up in and i know about half of it *is* my fault (the breakdown of it could have gone better an#i was the only person in charge of breaking things down between me and my parents)#but like... i don't want to be in this position in the first place where i'm having to cut my parents off because they're shitty people#like... id on't know if they think maybe i *like* doing this to the family but i don't#i do like not having them around but i don't like that i don't want them around if that makes any fucking sense#and i STILL cannot be sad about grandpa only because it's ALL THE OTHER JUNK TOO#like she's not innocent let me not paint her as a good communicator here#she also added in things between the lines i don't appreciate her doing because it makes the outreach feel shitty#and like i know i know i've gone completely dark after this and no i'm not actually doing that great now that grandpa's dead#like that still sucks really hard and pip hasn't super really processed it yet and it's going to hurt when she gets there and i'm not ready#for that yet and now i have a Nice Thing to look forward to and i have Nice People around me and all i want to do is just Have A Good Time#but i know i've been quiet i know i haven't reached out like i'm supposed to i know#but also... stop badgering me about it - i know. i know what i'm supposed to do they all treat me like i'm not doing it because i forgot#I WENT TO ETIQUETTE CLASSES I KNOW WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO#i'm either deliberately not doing it on purpose or i'm not doing it because I *can't* yet.#i can't talk to my grandma on the phone i can't do that absolutely not#i'm trying to work up to a *text message* or an *email* which is not in any way nearly the right thing to do#but like. it's all i've got and i can't give her *nothing* but i don't... have anything to give her outside of a condolences text message#because i don't even know where i'm at about it yet BECAUSE MY GODDAMN PARENTS AND SISTER KEEP BUTTING IN AND NOT LETTING ME PROCESS#i get it i get that they're probably worried i know i know i'm the asshole here#i get it#but also i am not their concern anymore they all washed their hands of me when i was nearby
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While I'm writing things that I've been intending to write for a while... one of the things that I think that a lot of people who haven't been involved in like... banking or corporate shenaniganry miss about why our economy is its current flavor of total fuckery is the concept of "fiduciary duty to shareholders."
"Why does every corporation pursue endless growth?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.
"Why do corporations treat workers the way they do?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.
"Why do corporations make such bass-ackwards decisions about what's 'good for' the company?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.
The legal purpose of a corporation with shareholders -- its only true purpose -- is the generation of revenue/returns for shareholders. Period. That's it. Anything else it does is secondary to that. Sustainability of business, treatment of workers, sustainability and quality of product, those things are functionally and legally second to generating revenue for shareholders. Again, period, end of story. There is no other function of a corporation, and all of its extensive legal privileges exist to allow it to do that.
"But Spider," you might say, "that sounds like corporations only exist in current business in order to extract as much money and value as possible from the people actually doing the work and transfer it up to the people who aren't actually doing the work!"
Yes. You are correct. Thank you for coming with me to that realization. You are incredibly smart and also attractive.
You might also say, "but Spider, is this a legal obligation? Could those running a company be held legally responsible for failing their obligations if they prioritize sustainability or quality of product or care of workers above returns for shareholders?"
Yes! They absolutely can! Isn't that terrifying? Also you look great today, you're terribly clever for thinking about these things. The board and officers of a corporation can be held legally responsible to varying degrees for failing to maximize shareholder value.
And that, my friends, is why corporations do things that don't seem to make any fucking sense, and why 'continuous growth' is valued above literally anything else: because it fucking has to be.
If you're thinking that this doesn't sound like a sustainable economic model, you're not alone. People who are much smarter than both of us, and probably nearly as attractive, have written a proposal for how to change corporate law in order to create a more sensible and sustainable economy. This is one of several proposals, and while I don't agree with all of this stuff, I think that reading it will really help people as a springboard to understanding exactly why our economy is as fucked up as it is, and why just saying 'well then don't pursue eternal growth' isn't going to work -- because right now it legally can't. We'd need to change -- and we can change -- the laws around corporate governance.
This concept of 'shareholder primacy' and the fiduciary duty to shareholders is one I had to learn when I was getting my securities licenses, and every time I see people confusedly asking why corporations try to grow grow grow in a way that only makes sense if you're a tumor, I sigh and think, 'yeah, fiduciary duty to shareholders.'
(And this is why Emet and I have refused to seek investors for NK -- we might become beholden to make decisions which maximize investor return, and that would get in the way of being able to fully support our people and our values and say the things we started this company to say.)
Anyway, you should read up on these concepts if you're not familiar. It's pretty eye-opening.
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disclaimer for the anxious person: it's okay if you don't do this perfectly. don't dehydrate yourself if you end up being unable to do this for all the water you drink.
A new study finds you can reduce the amount of microplastics you drink simply by boiling your water.
Scientists are just beginning to understand the health risks associated with microplastic exposure.
Nano- and microplastics are bits of plastic as tiny as one-thousandth of a millimeter in diameter.
Boiling and filtering your tap water may dramatically lower the amount of microplastics you drink, according to new research.
Recent studies have found that nano- and microplastics (NMPs), which are bits of plastic as tiny as one-thousandth of a millimeter in diameter, have been found in a host of products and even in tap water.
A new study, published February 28 in Environmental Science & Technology Letters, found that boiling mineral-rich water for just five minutes can reduce the amount of NMP you’re exposed to by up to 90%.
Scientists are just beginning to understand the health risks associated with microplastic exposureTrusted Source, but growing evidenceTrusted Source suggests the plastics can accumulate in the body and trigger oxidative stress, inflammation, insulin resistance, and liver issues.
Certain advanced water filtration systems can capture and help remove some NMPs from tap water. But researchers wanted to figure out other options to remove microplastics, especially since in poorer countries cheaper, more accessible solutions for clean water are needed.
Boiling water may be a safe, simple solution that can effectively decontaminate household tap water, the new findings suggest.
“Boiling water before drinking is a great example of an ancient cultural practice that can help reduce an environmental exposure,” Dr. Luz Claudio, PhD, a professor of environmental medicine and public health at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, told Healthline.
Claudio was not involved in the study.
How boiling water can help remove microplastics
The researchers found simply boiling water is the first step to removing NMPs from tap water.
The researchers collected multiple samples of tap water from Guangzhou, China and contaminated the samples with varying levels of NMPs.
Each sample was boiled for five minutes then left to cool for 10 minutes.
Boiling hard water that’s rich with minerals — such as calcium or magnesium — creates a chalk-like residue known as limescale, or calcium carbonate (CaCO3), which can trap the plastics.
That solid, chalky residue then had to be separated and removed from the water with a standard coffee filter or stainless steel filter, thereby removing NMPs.
The team found that the impact was greatest in harder water: In samples that had 300 milligrams of CaCO3, for example, nearly 90% of NMPs were removed.
In softer water samples with less than 60 mg of CaCO3, roughly 25% of NMPs were removed.
“What’s important to note here is that the effectiveness of trapping these micro/nano plastics in these mineral solids is tied to how hard the water is – the harder the water, the more solids are formed, the more microplastics are trapped,” Dr. Anja Brandon, PhD, the associate director of U.S. plastics policy at Ocean Conservancy and an environmental engineer, told Healthline.
Brandon was not involved in the study...
How to limit your exposure to microplastics
Anyone who wishes to boil their water should do so in a glass or stainless steel pot.
After boiling the water for about five minutes, let it cool, and do not stir it, Claudio says.
The microplastics need to bind to the calcium and fall to the bottom of the pot so they can filtered or scooped out."
-via Healthline, February 28, 2024
#this sounds like bullshit but#read til the end#and if you're gonna do both boil it BEFORE you filter#bc this will not work nearly as well in filtered water#also if i can give advice to most of the populace just get a good filter. as much as this is great i'm not sure it's feasible for most of u#to boil all our water. i know a few people who've tried it and they end up chronically dehydrated which is worse#and know that we live in a time where medicine means we have longer lifespans than ever and if you don't do it perfectly it's okay#but if you ever end up with plastic rich water for some reason. you can do this to mitigate some impacts#though one ingestion will likely do no harm. it's the repeated high exposure that will cause the problems listed#which obviously leads to conversations about environmental racism because access to healthy clean water is a human right
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I have. So much bitching to do
#it's just bitching nothing serious but#ok so the surgeon i work for is at a conference rn#so all of sx team is hunting for hours#the only options are to work er or drive nearly an hour at six am to work for a diff surgeon#i chose that option bc fuck er#then last minute that option was cancelled for today#so i told my partner that if er really needed me today they could call me in#(my partner is working er swing shift bc that's their natural schedule and even tho they don't love er they take any chance they can get)#so they call me in at three for what should've been an easy quick fb but turns out it's actually a 4.5 hr disaster#that i was scrubbed in for all of#so now I'm just now getting home and i need to be back at work in 8 hrs#which is not even what's pissing me off the most#it's that the surgeon apparently is coming home early??? and cutting two cases??? and non sx team ppl who don't need sx training#are gonna be doing it???#they don't need hours they don't need sx experience#at least if you're not going to call in your team then train new ppl? and don't make your team travel hither and yon just to make rent???#I'm just very tired and so painful(i injured my neck and still can't look to the left)#and i don't do well with changes to my routine esp when they're completely unnecessary and benefit no one??#and also this all means that the five or so hours i worked today is all I'm gonna see my partner until Friday... and we're gonna be on call#i love this job so much but at this rate I'm gonna be down nearly a full week of pay this month and yet still had to miss every tkd class#anyway#i still need to shower and then sleep#so I'm done bitching
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If my boss tells me one more time "we don't work for free" in relation to me not wanting to overcharge the client, maybe I should respond "well according to my payslip, I do" and then just quit
#no but what dumb idiot works for under $50000 a year?????#like well under#and my boss tells me that i should get a pay rise and I'm not earning what i should be like????? what do i say that#also the worst part is I've SNOOPED I've seen Colleen's contract from 2019 IT'S THE BLOODY SAME A SMIDGE HIGHER#disgusting#apologies to anyone reading this who full time works/carer/etc who earns less than me but i sympathise with you#it's pathetic#also my boss would think I'm undercharging but i just put it up 10% (her rule of thumb) as per the previous invoice#which is what the clients are used to#she wants to charge them based on what time the accountants spent on the job#multiplied by some ridiculous charge out rate#she didn't yell at me today but she did talk in her frantic fast way which means she must be period having#which means I'm nearly period having#The joys of being on the same cycle as your 67 year old boss#i mean i say this as if she's never spoken to me like that any other week SHUT UP DON'T RUIN MY THEORY#I LIKE SYNCING PERIODS IT'S FUN ESPECIALLY IF THE OTHER PERSON DOESN'T MENSTRUATE#don't let me sync with an actual menstruator i might die
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I think in this new age of A.I. the general public is going to need to increase their photography and lighting literacy. The response to this photo has just been a shit show.
There are people pointing out perfectly normal edge lighting and misunderstanding how reflections work.
First the plane is parked at an angle. The tail is farther back than the nose. But also that is a curved surface and it tapers. It's reflecting the area to the right of the photo.
And the bottom of the plane is reflecting what is directly underneath. Which is the tarmac, not the crowd.
It should also be noted that photo was shot with a very telephoto lens and everything is super compressed. The crowd appears much closer to the airplane than they actually are.
But then someone who should have good understanding of lighting said this...
And now I'm worried for her clients. Because that's very... wrong.
Well, wrong-ish.
First, let's try to understand why this photo is setting off some alarm bells.
The crowd toward the rear is in shadow, but they are still very well exposed. But then there is also a bright light source creating a strong edge light on them. Looking at this photo with just the context of what is in it, there are some things that seem uncanny.
The information we do not have is the people in the shadow area are inside a very brightly lit airplane hangar.
So they have artificial light blasting them from the top.
But that light is still much dimmer than the sunlit areas outside so they appear in shade. But we are used to shade being much darker than areas in direct sun. So the balance seems off in our brain. We expect the people to be darker because we don't have the context of the bright hangar lights above them.
But the other issue is that the photo was post processed. It wasn't manipulated. The pixels weren't changed. But the exposure balance was altered.
If I were to guess, the original photo looked more like this...
But newer digital cameras can have 13 to 15 stops of dynamic range. And if you shoot in RAW, you can easily lift shadows and bring down highlights. You can balance the exposure so the dark parts aren't as dark and the bright parts aren't as bright. This photographer might have overdone it a bit in this case, but this is a fairly standard edit used to bring balance to photos.
And lastly, where does the edge light come from?
Edge lighting or backlighting or rim lighting (all the same) should probably be called wrap-around lighting if you want to be more accurate.
It comes from a homogenous light source that is larger than the subject being lit. So with my knife photo, I placed it on a large LED panel light.
The light source was bigger than the subject so it wrapped around the edges.
And I'm afraid the airplane is not nearly large enough to create a light source to wrap around everyone in the crowd. It isn't even reflecting direct sunlight. So I'm sorry to say that lighting designer was mostly mistaken despite the confidence.
The light source is... everything.
That entire red area I highlighted is the light source.
As well as everything above and everything to the sides.
And the biggest aspect of that light source would be the sky above. I think people always forget the sky is a light source. If you are seeing blue, you are seeing light. And I guess the plane is included in that, but that entire highlighted red area is so bright, and so filled with sunlight bouncing around, that it creates basically a giant softbox. It becomes a huge single light source for the people in the hangar.
If you look at footage taken from way inside the hangar, you can see the camera adjusting exposure for the crowd inside, but look at what happens to the sunlit area outside.
What does that look like?
A giant softbox.
A single homogenous light source blasting light inside the hangar.
The sun is so incredibly bright that even when it is not directly lighting something, the light just bouncing around outside is enough to overpower the very bright hangar lights.
So, what have we learned from this?
Perhaps people should hire me to be their lighting designer.
Though I'm sure she is actually very talented. She seems to work with stage lights and this is more physics and photography.
Phystography.
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