#which IS a real life belief held by shitty people that needs to be addressed

[the-owl-tree]

Okay I would like to ramble rq bc you are the best one for calling out the series. But the MISOGYNY is going crazy. Let's talk abt our favorite boy crowfeather.

He learns his lesson.. OMG GUYS HES NOT MESSING UP AND DOING BAD SHIT ANYMORE.. LEADER RIGHT HERE

It's giving brambleclaw (we don't give him respect of bramblestar) but like how is it that once a male character suddenly "learns" he's perfect as a character and leader? And everyone is okay with it? Leafpool had her lesson learned FOREVER and no one accepted it and kept shaming her except for like 2 ppl. And Lizardstripe? How dare she not want kits? Wow what a monster for not wanting to make being a queen her whole personality. Let's make her "ambitious" bc an ambitious woman is a bad one. Like.... ??????? It confuses me sm bc I thought it was good for ppl to be ambitious? The problem is they labeled tigerclaw as "ambitious" and "bloodthirsty"(he is) so everyone associates "ambitious" with bad. But tigerheart is ambitious and he's a good guy(sorta not rlly). But she wasnt ever ambitious again after her kits left the nursery so like? So idk???

And squilf... oh squilf.. only known as brambleclaws mate. Like that's all she's written for I swear, promoting brambleclaw, fueling the feud between brambleclaw and ashfur, omg firestars daughter, like she has a personality sure, but not one that's used.

And how about Brooke? From the mountain tribe? She was well written sure, but after the whole trip and her and stonefur went back for help she wasn't relevant.. like at all. She was then known as the cat who married a clancat and saved the tribe but she wasn't appreciated like firestar after saving the clans. Like ik there's kind of a difference there but I mean cmon she still worked hard and didn't get a lot of recognition! I love her character but she lost any and all personality after the one arc. And half moon.... she was.. interesting. Ppl can interpret her character so many different ways but I think she was literally a book device to add drama and pain to jayfeather. They needed him to have a reason to be connected to the tribe so they invented a shecat to be his mate or wtv. I mean she had a personality but no purpose other than to fuel jayfeather and his angst.

HOLY CRAP THIS IS LONG IM SO SORRY DEER I GOT PASSIONATE😰

YOU'RE GOOD! Crowfeather my detested. Proof that an abusive father can not only blame his mate for shit she didn't do (no she did not turn Breezepelt against Crowfeather, go read Outcast PLEASE) and have it be held as canon for years until it's retconned in......the super edition where the abusive father has to have his hand held by onestar, nightcloud, heathertail, feathertail, AND ashfoot in order to learn that Wanting Your Son Dead is Actually Bad. In a fascinating turn of events, this was then taken as a compelling story by fans instead of the most blatant double standard I've ever fucking seen.

Crowfeather gets a promotion for learning that abusing his son might be icky, but Leafpool get humiliated, berated, and threatened to be thrown in cat hell for doing everything right for the children that StarClan manipulated her into having. Fun.

For Lizardstripe, well. Ambition is okay as long as it's not a woman who doesn't want to feel confined by the strict expectation that she have babies and also accepts that the father has zero obligation to help her and will face zero repercussions for doing Fuck All. But it's a-okay, Yellowfang's Secret assured, because Lizardstripe would be happier if she just mindlessly accepted the duty of every she-cat is to have babies and those that don't want that are abusive monsters.

squilf deserves an essay on what she's been trhough good LORD poor girly. it's what makes her compelling in many ways, the trials and tribulations she's been through, and stripping it would just make her lose a lot of her spark......but man is it frustrating to watch the authors endlessly fawn over bramblestar.

Brook and Half Moon I have no strong thoughts on. I think the document covering the anti-Indigenous writing in the series breaks down her issues way better than I can, and Half Moon and the original lake cats are like. very nothing characters to me lol wasted potential!

[havenesa-sera-fina]

Hidden Marks [4: Promises and Regrets]

Summary: Wrapping his own arms around her shoulders, Namjoon pulled her in, resting his head on the crown of her head, his heart beating steadily, which Sera heard and smiled to herself. Even with his odd lengthy limbs, they fit together perfectly, "Sera, I'm falling in love with you, that I want to convince you not to go, but I trust you. I just want you to be happy, to never cry over us again. I can't promise you that if you choose to stay with us, everything will be rainbows and sunshine, but I promise you that we won't give up on you, on this relationship. We're not perfect like everyone thinks we are, we're not the perfect bunch of soulmates, we have problems as a group and individuals, secrets that we all keep, burdens that we try to carry on our own. Though we all have each other, to fall back on when things get brought, and that includes you now. We're soulmates, so if anything happens, don't be scared to tell us.

(Poly BTS/OT7 x Reader/OC)

College Au / Soulmate Au

Disclaimer: Bts isn't my or any real life people (obviously.) Any other characters are my though. This is my story so do not republish this anywhere or I will report.

There maybe some triggers, but I will address them within the chapters.

Sources: Wattpad

Word count: 2199

I didn't leave my room.

Well, that was a lie.

I would leave whenever I knew Kimie had left for classes for the day. Occasionally she would knock on my door, to tell me there was food to eat. Kimie always made sure to tell me whenever she was going to leave and would text me when she was gonna come back. Maybe she was just trying to give me room to breathe, and I was grateful for it.

It continued like that till next Monday, luckily my doctor emailed my school about why I was missing school for a week. I also managed to finish any online assignments that my teachers posted.

I didn't want to get too far behind.

Reluctantly I woke up early this morning and began my usual morning routine to get ready for school. I was more cautious though, to make fewer sounds as I didn't want to wake up Kimie.

When I walk through the campus, I kept my head low, but I didn't even know why. I expected to feel anxious and scared to jump into Lilia or any of her boyfriends, but I felt nothing. Ever since I said those words to Jungkook, I felt hopelessly empty.

Maybe it was because I wasn't taking my medication, and with that, I made a mental note to call my doctor later. Earlier when I walked out to the living room, I didn't see any of my pills on the ground, which Kimie most likely cleaned up. Now that did cause me to feel something, guilt.

"You're finally up and walking darling!" I heard a familiar and comforting voice behind me, as I stopped walking and turned around. Baekhyun with his dazzling smile and warm eyes stared back at me.

Not with pity, sadness or with cautious eyes, but his usual self.

I was grateful to him.

When he reached me, he engulfed me in a hug without another word, and just held me there. In his arms, it always felt safe and reassuring, but it didn't ever fill that empty feeling. However, with nearly a week of isolation from people, I really just needed to be held.

So instead of pulling away, I buried my face into his chest, as I wrapped my own arms around him. In return, he tightened his grip, resting his chin on my head, as he murmured a simple, "I'm here, you're not alone Sera."

Those words caused a faucet within me to turn, as the tears came slowly at first, but within a few moments, I was sobbing in his arms, "Everything hurts Baekhyun," I knew people were staring, but I didn't care, "I wish we can just go back to high school, so I don't have to feel all this pain."

"We can't ever go back...but know, that I'm always here. You can share your pain with me, you don't have to bare it alone.

"It hurts whenever I see them together, it hurt so fucking badly."

There was a wisp of a lie, as the pain was numb, both emotionally and physically. I just couldn't figure out which was worse, the numbness or the pain.

*****

Snorting, I wanted to fling my sandwich at Baekhyun as he showered me with senseless and the weirdest praises. His attempts to make me feel better.

We were currently seated at a café off-campus, but nearby enough where we just walked there. I ended up skipping class, with Baekhyun convincing me, as he showed me that he already picked up the notes I've missed and the paper assignments he had. Guess he was planning to take me out whenever I decide to leave the comforts of my room.

"Remember they are just Walmart and you are target!" He all but yelled at me, garnering a few looks from nearby customers. Some with annoyance and others with amusement, "They're just samples and you're a full-course meal!"

That one I nearly choked on the coffee I was drinking, and burst out laughing, "What the hell Hyunnie."

A wide smile spread across his face, "Honestly, they're missing out if you asked me," he then shoved a huge piece of his pancake in his mouth.

Rolling my eyes, I leaned back into my chair and crossed my arms over my chest, "We still up to go to the fair?"

"Hell yeah! Let's go this Saturday and just go crazy, forget everything, scream our lungs out, walk till our legs give out, stuff our stomachs till we give birth to a food baby and get wasted!"

Much to the contradictory belief that Baekhyun was as innocent can be with his appearance, he was quite a party animal when he wanted to be. Even throughout our high school years, we went to multiple parties, from the simple ones to the ones that cops would bust down. Of course, he never let his partying ways affect him academically, as he was a dazzling student, but whenever he needed to let off some steam, you'd find him at some frats house party. Occasionally he'd drag me along with him, and it wasn't the partying that was worth memorizing, but it was the drunken talks and confessions that were worth remembering if I could remember them at least.

We were so preoccupied, that we didn't notice three figures walk into the café and take a seat to the table next to us.

Once I drank all my coffee, I ended up ordering another as I still felt tired and miserable. Though it was lessened with Baekhyun.

Running a hand down my face, I sighed slightly in frustration, "How the hell am I going to apologize to Lilia? I practically yelled at her boyfriend and been a shitty friend.

Baekhyun scoffed at that, "why do you need to apologize?" His voice sounded slightly harsh, but I knew it wasn't directed towards me, "You were already having a shit couple of days and the moment you decide to go home, she blows upon your face? To top it all off, she crossed a boundary when she tried revealing your marks."

That part I couldn't easily forgive and forget.

Lilia, Kimie and Baekhyun knew about how I felt about my marks. How I didn't feel at all comfortable about showing it to anyone. Also, the topic of soulmates and how I never liked talking about it. It was ironic, when I was younger I never shut up about it.

Yet Lilia had completely disregard and pushed every boundary there was, and yet, I still felt guilty, "she was just worried about me."

"We all were and you don't see Kimie trying to force you to do something you didn't want to do."

We paused momentarily when the waiter came back with our coffees, before Baekhyun continued on with his little speech, "I get you feel like you owe her and that you made a promise, but you need to start thinking about yourself. About your health and happiness darling. What happened years ago wasn't your fault, and no one should hold it over your head. Sure your brother wanted Lilia to be happy and loved, but I'm sure as hell he wants the very same for you."

"Maybe I'm being selfish, but I wish I never took that gap year," I mumbled, shoulders sinking as I could only stare at my coffee. I had now lost my appetite for any sweets, "Things could have been so different."

"It's not selfish!" He spoke a little too loudly, causing some people to now hush him a little, but he paid no mind, "You could still change things, still be with your soulmates. The only one holding yourself back is yourself."

"How can I possibly ruin Lilia's happiness now?"

"She would understand, and if she doesn't, then she never really was your friend in the first place."

Even with Baekhyun's words, it didn't stop the guilt eating away at me, for everything.

Lilia was just worried about me, that was the reason why she blew up on me. Even I could admit that I hardly tell her much of anything and that I did become distant. Because no matter what, they were always with her, and it was just so damn painful to be around her, with them being so loving and caring towards her. It was selfish, but I can't help but feel bitter whenever I see them together.

"Hey," a voice cut beside us, and I flinched at the harshness because I knew who it was from.

Turning to look, Yoongi, Taehyung, and Hoseok we're sitting beside us, with their own coffee and food. All three hard an unreadable expression, except Yoongi, who seemed to have a pissed off one. His glare was directed towards me and it caused me to shift uncomfortably in my chair.

"We'd appreciate if you wouldn't talk about our girlfriend behind her back," Yoongi bit out, obvious anger seeping out of him.

However, instead of feeling my mark flare up in pain, there was this numbing feeling that overcame me. I only stared blankly at him, not really knowing what to say. Any other time my heart would skip a beat, but I don't even know if it's still beating right now.

Then I remembered last night, that I indirectly rejected them.

"And I'd appreciate if she doesn't force someone to reveal their soul marks," Baekhyun hissed out, with just enough venom as he matched Yoongi's glare.

I moved my eyes away from the three boys and back at Baekhyun, who looked ready to jump at Yoongi. Sighing, I kicked him gently underneath the table to catch his attention, "Let's go, I can miss my chem class but not my bio class."

"Why the hell do we have to leave?" He hissed out.

Rolling my eyes, I stood up and gathered my stuff, "Because I'm tired Hyunnie, so let's just go. Okay?"

He didn't reply for a second, but then he stood up, and glared angrily at the three boys, "You better keep your girlfriend in check, because next time she tries to force Sera into doing something she doesn't want to do, we're going to have problems."

"Baekhyun!" I gasped at his little threat.

I knew Baekhyun was never fond of Lilia, but she was still my friend and even I don't appreciate his threat towards her. The three boys didn't also.

"What! She has seven guys protecting her, you need someone to be on your side!"

I only rolled my eyes, before dragging him out the Cafe.

The three boys watched them leave, as Taehyung ran his hands through his hair, a sigh of frustration gaining the attention of his other soulmates. He felt so many emotions, that he couldn't pinpoint an exact one, "Why the hell does she hate us so much? She cursed at Kookie for god's sake."

Ever since last week when Jungkook brought a sobbing Lilia back to their apartment, Taehyung had felt such a numb feeling. Something felt off, and even the sight of his crying girlfriend couldn't make him break out of it. When Jungkook then told them what had transpired, he was filled with so much rage, but not towards Sera but at Lilia, for trying to force someone to reveal their soulmate mark. So when she looked at him expectantly, as if waiting for him to comfort her, it only filled him with annoyance that he just went in his room and ignored her.

Soul marks were something so intimate and private, and people should be allowed to hide it if they wanted to. To have someone try to force a person to reveal it, it just wasn't something right.

Jimin has attempted to ask why he was being cold towards Lilia but in all honesty, he didn't know.

Taehyung was never like this, always being the first to comfort Lilia whenever she was upset, make her feel loved and safe. However, something about this situation just felt off, and he ended up telling Jimin to drop it and to leave him alone. To which he did, but without stating that Lilia was upset at him.

"Why do you care if she likes us or not?" Hoseok asks curiously, bringing up his hand to comfortingly rubbing the silver-haired boy's neck.

Instantly the touch of his soulmate soothes him, and he leaned into Hoseok's touch, "It's just that..." he whined slightly, trying to find the right words to express how he felt, "Since last week I've felt off and I don't know why. I don't like the fact that Sera doesn't like us for no reason."

He ended up burying his head into Hoseok's shoulder, just trying to relish in his warmth and presence. Usually just cuddling to anyone of his soulmate would comfort him, but this time it didn't and it left an empty feeling in his heart.

Taehyung missed the worried looks that Hoseok and Yoongi shared with one another.

The one feeling that was clear, was the anger he felt when he saw Baekhyun's hand on Sera's lower back, to guide her out of the café.

Never before did he feel like attacking another person.

[snom0001inu]

Reality Meets Fiction

A bit of a random rant and speculation revolving around Spindlehorse’s seemingly constant drama.

Long post ahead! Am not really looking for discourse, just wanna get my thoughts out. 

Shows like South Park, Rick and Morty, Family Guy, American Dad, and so forth. They all have this similar theme of dark/black/gallows comedy with taboo subjects being the punchline to a LOT of their jokes. These shows have a notorious reputation because NO community is safe from their distasteful jokes and they’ve very easily crossed into dangerous territory without much repercussion. 

People have argued the quality of these shows because they just get off being so offensive and Vivienne Medrano once went on Twitter to criticize Family Guy but praise South Park. Medrano claimed South Park was one of the biggest influences in her animation career and Family Guy shouldn’t be considered the less mild of the two.

In my opinion, that’s very backhanded and bias. The shows are similar to one another, with the main difference being South Park addresses modern issues while Family Guy rips into more political and religious beliefs, but they’re not worlds apart. They go off of satire and shock value more than anything else. If Vivienne likes one more, that’s fine but don’t act like one is morally superior when they both depend on offending somebody.

But why is that relevant? Well.......the main problem people have with these shows is that they encourage dismissive attitudes towards real life problems. It’s very clear that these shows leak into reality and can warp or encourage people’s minds to be intolerant and cause trouble for the communities targeted. 

I suspect the reason Spindlehorse keeps having these “scandals” with their team members is because they all have this shitty behavior off the internet and it doesn’t raise red flags due to almost everyone on the team having the same “dark humor” because liking South Park or Ricky and Morty or yadda yadda.

A problem I’ve noticed with Spindlehorse over all is everyone is too familiar with each other. They seem to blur the lines between professional and personal, which makes it easy for someone to be.....offensive.....and not get called out on it. Or if they are called out on it, Spindlehorse feels like they have to stand up for their friend instead of their image (Brock Baker, Faustisse, Christopher Niosi, KenDraws, etc). 

Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s amazing everyone feels like a family, but it’s a problem that they keep forgetting that their little clique is in the public eye and WILL be held responsible for the trouble they’ve caused. I don’t mean that in the sense that they deserve to be doxxed or deserve to lose the ability to work, but the internet does not have to pardon them and Spindlehorse in general needs to start setting boundaries and damage control, otherwise the whole team suffers guilt by association because they try to retain a (toxic) friendship. 

[mothermaidenclone-blog]

Ad Astra or This Movie Was the Brad Pitts

Ad Astra was the worst movie I have paid to see since 2015’s Kill Your Friends, which is my least favourite cinema experience of all time. It was a dry and dreary story about emotionally stunted white men in a bleak and boring capitalist version of space, with jarring and superfluous Christian undertones. The plot and everyone’s motives were so non-existent that Brad Pitt had to narrate the whole thing in a monotone so flat and dead I literally screamed all the way from the cinema to the bus stop when it was over, partly out of a frustration so deep it was non-verbal, but also just to finally hear some pitch variation.

*Ad Astra spoilers follow*

There technically were women in this movie. Lots of women, particularly women of colour, occupied high ranking positions and were addressed by their titles, a touch I think is important and that usually tips the scales in favour of a good review for me. We were graced with Adjutant General Vogel (LisaGay Hamilton), Captain Lu (Freda Foh Shen), Sergeant Romano (Kimmy Shields), Tanya Pincus (Natasha Lyonne) and Lorraine Deavers (Kimberly Elise), as well as several unnamed female personnel (Kayla Adams, Elisa Perry, Sasha Compère and Mallory Low). I would like to particularly highlight Natasha Lyonne’s performance as apparently she was the only actor employed to play a human being and not a replicant. She was on screen for maybe twenty seconds, as is sadly the case with most of these women, but was a glorious breath of fresh air as the only character to simultaneously emote expressively and speak with inflection and enthusiasm. The only one! In a two hour movie!

All of these women appear to be respected and capable members of various illustrious teams, but are always outnumbered by men. There are two male generals alongside Vogel and Deavers is initially outnumbered 4:1 on her space craft by men. Tragically, whenever a team is being picked off, it is always the people of colour who die first. Not only is this obviously racist, it is just a disgusting cliché that we just don’t need to see anymore in movies. Deavers dies first when Roy (Brad Pitt) forcibly invades their vehicle, followed by Franklin Yoshida (Bobby Nish), an Asian man, and Donald Stanford (Loren Dean), a white guy, is the last to go. Roy cradles him in his arms and attempts to save his life. I hope it’s not just me that sees something wrong with the order of events there.

A similar scenario takes place in the lunar chase, which absurdly seems to occur in the same crapy looking buggies as the original moon landing, a confusing visual choice considering we’ve just seen a vast and impressive modern concrete moon base. The film takes the time to introduce us to Willie Levant (Sean Blakemore), a black officer who will be escorting Ray across the moon. As soon as we see he has a photo of his wife and child taped to his tablet screen I knew he was going to die - in the year 2019 I should not be able to predict that a black character is going to die because we saw a family photo. Can we just not anymore? Again, aside from the racism, that’s just shitty writing. I like to think that as a species, if we can conceptualise something as vast and seemingly impossible as solar travel, we can also move beyond basic and derogatory cinematic tropes.

I was most excited by the appearance of Helen Lantos (Ruth Negga), a woman of colour who occupies a position of power on Mars and introduces herself assertively using her full name. Also, her whole look was excellent. However, this brief release of serotonin was very short lived as she literally walks Roy down a corridor then is immediately cut off and superseded by a white guy with a man bun. Lantos does return later, but alas, as an exposition machine to give Roy some plot news about his dad. Even as she explains that her parents were murdered by his, Lantos falls victim to the dire, emotionless monotone that I can only assume was forced on the entire cast of this film. Then, she is an actual chauffeur and drives Ray to a manhole so he can continue his dad quest. A character brimming with original potential is presented as nothing more than a device.

The final woman to mention is the first one we see, Roy’s ex-wife Eve (Liv Tyler). We see the blurry, out of focus back of her head in the background of a shot before we see her face, and this is incredibly telling, because that’s all Eve is, the simulacrum of a woman. She could be anybody - so why she is Liv Tyler defies belief, I can only assume they held her loved ones hostage - her story is untold and entirely irrelevant. Again, she is only a device, although this time not for Roy’s forward momentum, but this time seemingly to emphasise that Roy is a total sociopath with no emotions whatsoever. We don’t learn Eve’s name for another twenty minutes, and it is an hour and twenty minutes before we hear her speak. Even then, it’s not a live conversation, because god forbid this film have too many of those, but a voice recording explaining that their relationship is over. I’m not going to lie, I’m pretty sure that’s what it was, but everything she said was so generic I have no memory of it whatsoever. She is presented as a ghost, a blurry image on a screen, a memory fixed in time, not a real person with agency and personality. At the end of the movie we finally see her in real time, and that is when she has made the unfathomable decision to meet Roy for coffee. Even her face in that moment gives no emotion away, perhaps because Tyler had no idea how to act this entirely nonsensical decision. To our knowledge, she would not have seen any change in Roy, only received news that he survived a dangerous space mission, which is apparently enough of a reason to get back with this emotionless egg of a man?

I almost didn’t want to devote words to them, but I think it’s important to address just how dire Roy and his dad H. Clifford McBride (Tommy Lee Jones) are. This is their film, they are the reason that all of these women’s stories are passed over. It is made clear over and over again that both Roy and Clifford believe they are the only people capable of completing their various missions. Roy hijacks a ship and inadvertently kills everyone on board because he thinks that it’s his destiny or whatever to get his dad back, never mind that they were all highly trained space personnel who were arguably better suited to the mission precisely because it wasn’t their dad. Clifford straight up murders his whole crew because they are too “small minded” to fly off further and further into space forever on a mission that has yet yielded absolutely no evidence of their goals. A variety of talented human beings are destroyed because of the entitlement of white men, their delusional and unshakable conviction that they are at the centre of the universe and that no one else could possibly accomplish the lofty goals that kismet apparently calls them to.

The way they speak about themselves and to each other is absolutely psychotic. Roy’s solo musings include, “The flight recorder will tell the story, but history will have to decide,” and “In the end, the son suffers the sins of the father.” Clifford imparts his son with the delightful greeting of, “There was never anything there for me, I never cared for you or your mother or your small ideas.” In addition, they both physically flinch from human contact at various points in the move. Now, I totally understand that we live in a neurodiverse world and that many people experience emotions and social interactions in any number of ways, and that is a beautiful thing that makes our world so interesting to live in. However, that these men both abjectly state that they have no empathy is presented within the context of their megalomaniacal ideals that they must accomplish their god-given quests irregardless of how many people they have to kill along the way. It is a facet of their strangely two-dimensional, arrogant and narcissistic personalities, not one part of many complex features that make a complete and relatable human being.

Roy has to literally say out loud that he is a human being at the end of the movie; “I will rely on those closest to me…I will live and love,” which makes him sound more like a learning AI trying to pass a Turing test than anything else. The music swells as Clifford throws himself towards the surface of Neptune in an orchestral deluge that is unsubtly significant in this very quiet film, as though I’m supposed to start crying and think anything other than, “well thank fuck, it’s about time this murderer dies in the cold vacuum of space, I hope Roy stays spinning and screaming here forever too.” We are supposed to feel sympathy for them as the heroes of this movie, despite the fact that they show no care for anyone else throughout the whole thing and act entirely in their own self interests.

Overall, the women in this film are given about five seconds of potential as they introduce themselves variously as decorated soldiers and otherwise capable personnel, before being shoved to the side, or murdered, for Roy. This is obviously objectionable, but is made so much worse by the fact that Roy is an emotionless, entitled, empathy-less white man who doesn’t care if other people have to die for him to get what he wants. That is what these women are being passed up in favour of. I felt like I was watching a two hour long Voight-Kampff test. Space movies like this should be about what we can achieve if we work together as a species, not about how white men will still be the kings of dreary capitalism, even on the moon. We can do better than this.

And now for some asides:

What the actual fuck was the font at the beginning? I guess a red serif all caps should have alerted me to the fact that I was about to watch a horror movie.

As a lover of space horror, I was absolutely gutted that it was a bad CG angry baboon and not a cool gross alien. Also, what was that scene? “Hmm, we need to get rid of this loser because Brad Pitt is the best at space ships and he needs to be the captain. Uhh…what about…space monkeys? Yeah! Space monkeys on a deserted Norwegian ship. That makes sense.”

Can I just have a film bout those moon pirates fighting space capitalism please? I was more invested in them that anyone else in this garbage movie.

Credit for the Bradd Pitts joke goes to the talented and lovely Ed Cheverton

[thetasteoffire]

I think the hill I’m finally ready to die on is that the ‘woke’ brand of progressivism really contains the seeds of its own destruction in the unevenness of its rhetorical standards - that is, that the intellectual dishonesty of the kind of movement where the same person will tweet fervently about how disgusting it is that women are just regarded as sexual objects in a broader culture and then respond to all pictures of pretty/buff/both women with an allcaps “I’M SO GAY” is just...damning. Beyond off-putting; it’s self-destructive, in the sense that ‘an intellectual/cultural movement built on uncertain and inarticulable standards of conduct - any breach of which means a social media public stoning - is probably doomed’ seems self-evident to anyone willing to conceptualize it in those terms.

I read the new piece by the guy who was purported as wanting to hang women who’ve had abortions and while it’s obviously not exactly life-changing (crypieces by intellectuals who think they’re too smart to cry rarely are), there’s a few real out-of-body experiences: the “who gets sponsorships from Google and Pepsi” one is a solid soundbite, the overall breast-beating “I have been wronged” narrative is given new spin (if not new life), but the one that really hit me upside the head is that this very motherfucker had the Leftie Neighborhood Watch called to break down his door over the infamous quote which he insists was decontextualized - and then just paragraphs later pulled The Same Bullshit(TM), being sarcastic about something someone said that they claimed was taken out of context. The mob did it to him, and now he’s doing it to the mob.

Surely, the issue is becoming apparent, yes?

And I know, I know, half of the stuff that’s one here that rails against men/cis people/straight people/etc probably isn’t meant seriously or something and my point isn’t that those are the real oppressed people anyway, just that the praxis around being progressive in public and especially on social media fucking sucks. Why bother being a male ally when you see tungle.hell’s filthy internet hallways littered with posts captioned “men are weak af tbh.” Obviously with such cutting insights the patriarchy is only days from falling anyway! Sarcasm aside, the underlying question I always have when seeing that stuff is why? - since it really is a fairly intense deterrent, and the possibilities are...not inspiring: monastic-inspired denial of entry to ensure the willingness of the participant, complicated hazing ritual, earnest desire to actually not have male allies while claiming that you do to appear inclusive, earnest desire to not have male allies in your movement and continue feeling/appearing victimized because men refuse to help, just straight-up venting...probably all those and more have been the rationale since, despite the appearance of a hivemind, there really are individuals at work at the end of the day. But the key is: none of those reasons are good, none of them strengthen anything but esprit de corp for already enfranchised members, which, anyone can tell you, is really fucking bad for a movement interested in expanding its cultural cachet and really good for hardlining opposition. 

Straight women with mugs labelled “male tears” are just a symptom though. The real problem is still lurking in the second paragraph.

Which is, not to put too fine a point on it, sloppiness. The wave 2.9/Sex-in-the-City “feminism” that’s really just a cargo-cult style belief that emulating the worst elements of the patriarchy will give you the same freedom as the sexually caustic men who truly benefit from it is another good one. The conviction, true and to the bones, that when you tweeted “straight men are honestly garbage” that your ingroup, the straight men that you like and approve of (if any exist, who knows?), knew that you definitely didn’t mean them, that you were making a broader rhetorical point about those elements of straight masculinity that are often held up as the pinnacle of masculinity are so often self-destructive and harmful and can cause so much societal damage that men themselves, as a group, without reservations or exceptions because those are the confusing things needed denunciation (you were, of course, jut making that point - right? Right?) - but that some conservative motherfucker from Texas said that women who had had abortions needed to hang, and without reading the context first, you decided that he was full-bore 100% serious, and it was time to dogpile him - there’s another. 

I mean, he probably deserved it (?!). Even with context, it’s pretty spurious and a particularly bitter sort of sardonic that relies on reader knowledge of his position on capital punishment. Still...

I’m picking on ‘woke’ stuff mostly because there are enormous iniquities, and most of the problems that are talked about have a basis in reality that needs addressing, and progressive thought/politics are a good starting point. (Most. Not all problems.) It’s not really a surprise that irony has taken hold as the primary mode of ‘woke’  leftie discourse; when you mean only half of the shit you say literally anyway, irony is reflex. But again, you have to ask why it’s the continued mode when it has mostly ceased to serve; the field is choked with alarmist weeds, barrier-to-entry cowpies, and occasionally, the bodies of the ritually sacrificed dead lost in the tall grass when irony is abandoned, so poor is our grasp on earnestness. It could be what no one wants to acknowledge - that all of these methods, all these foibles, all these dope-as-hell roasts on twitter are just mimicking the suffering people endured at the hands of others, and gladly turn those tools on anyone “in power” at the first opportunity. Pause to meditate on the nearly Orwellian doublethink that is (rightly) wanting to change a society which degrades women whose appearance deviates from beauty norms, but having your opening mockery salvos toward shitty men be about how they’re balding, or unfavorable speculations on the size of their dick. Irony is virtually necessary as a paring mechanism; just hanging around some of these spaces is enough to see uncomfortable parallels of methodology between two ostensibly opposing sides - some sins are permitted by the ingroups, others are not, and the rules are arcane. 

It’s to the point that reading twitter can feel less like human interaction, and more like a visit to a faerie court. There’s no left and right in the politics of the internet mob - just Seelie and Unseelie. 

I mean, it’s no real skin off my back (until The Discourse comes for me, anyway). And even then, who knows? There’s dozens of posts/tweets/pieces of content/whatever written about how the left needs to unbunch its panties somewhat and let people grow - fine and good. I’m not necessarily hopeful that it’ll happen, since people love a show and a public execution tends to be a well-attended one, so far as shows go - doubly so when it’s just the death of public image (not coincidentally because you can kill those more than once and huzzah for that). But beyond its love for devouring its own young (and old), the conceptualization of progressivism as this delicate thing that will wilt at first touch of unworthy hand is nothing but pernicious. It’s already sold out, which is a good sign for a growing, healthy baby! Maybe, like, just maybe, if it were even a percentage as interested in recruiting as the DSA or say, the alt-right is, it could grow out of its tacit self-conceptualization as an institution which must be smol and pure, too good for this world. Or whatever it is that leads to the left getting so bored with itself it does stupid, navel-gazing shit in the face of literal fascism. 

[xiexiecaptain]

As a non-binary fan of SoC, I like to think about the implications of this scene a lot:

“Is Inej Ghafa your real name?”

A strange sound escaped Inej’s throat, part sob, part laugh. A weak, embarrassing sound. But it had been months since she’d heard her own name, her family name.

“Yes,” she managed.

“Is that what you prefer to be called?”

“Of course,” she said, then added, “Is Kaz Brekker your real name?”

“Real enough.”

Because it shows that Kaz understands the weight and importance of being called a name you want and being regarded/addressed in the way you need to be. (Inej is heavily connected to her birth name and so hearing and going by it means so much after having been called a false, objectifying one. And Kaz’s original last name is one he has a complicated relationship with and so goes by another.)

And I think about this scene a lot because it really strongly supports the fact that were Kaz ever to hire or work with a trans or gender-variant person, he wouldn’t bat a fucking eye. 

I mean, if you think about how trans people have historically been pushed to the margins of society and work/live in poor areas and have a high rate of sex work, you can bet your ass it’s SUPER likely the Barrel has its fair share of trans residents. And as Kaz has declared himself on multiple occasions, he knows everything that goes on in Ketterdam. He’d be in the know about all of it.

When he was hiring Inej on he literally asked her if she preferred to be called her birth name or not! Like, talk about a trans-inclusive question.

I mean, Kaz is in a gang with someone people routinely call Teapot for god’s sake, you really think he’s gonna get hung up by a name that’s traditionally gendered one way or another? The knowledge of someone’s trans identity would be something Kaz would just file away like any other fact about someone, same as their favorite coffee house, the things they spend their income on, what languages they speak, etc. It all goes in a little folder in his devious head to pull if he needs it.

Like, obv I wouldn’t put it past Kaz to be shitty about gender occasionally because we’ve seen that, if anything, Kaz Brekker is not sensitive about personal shit. He pokes at and makes comments about Inej’s and Matthias’ closely held religious beliefs, Nina’s devotion to her problematic country, Jesper’s gambling problems. But not in the way of reducing them to it. He makes jibes at Inej’s Suli proverbs and beliefs but he’s never fucking racist about it. His insults and remarks always have a personal slant to them. They’re always about the person and their relationship to the identity, never the group of people at large. That’s the thing, it’d be just like any other factor about someone. He’s insensitive about aspects of identity but he’s never mercher-level shitty and cruel. Take how Kaz treats Wylan’s learning disability and illiteracy, for instance. He’s like “so what? that’s just how you are. You can still make explosives, why should I care?” Which is how he pretty much treats anyone and regards anything. 

Kaz would be more likely to have the attitude of: “Does being genderfluid throw off your shot? No. So I’m not gonna fucking worry about it.” and “You wanna be referred to by they/them pronouns? No problem. That’s good, actually. More ambiguous. Gives away less info when people overhear things about you.”

I mean he wouldn’t be a super great ally or anything, let’s be real here. Take for example how he addressed Inej’s situation when she first joined the Dregs and moved to the Slat, being a young girl and a person of color. He told her that he wouldn’t be around to defend her against the disrespect she’d face and she’d have to watch her own back. Yet he still in words and actions shows that disrespect toward her because of her gender or ethnicity is never validated or welcomed around him. He’d probably be that way about gender identity and pronouns too. Like, he wouldn’t go out of his way to correct people if they misgendered someone but he’d make super witty burns on the person being shitty, he’d used correct words, he’d generally gain the intellectual upper hand in that way he has. He’d make it known that shitty comments and attitudes aren’t welcome or appreciated.

And Kaz would almost NEVER misgender anyone. Think about it. Kaz prides himself on knowing everything about everyone, about seeming like he’s mastered everything, and having a mind like a steel trap. He’d see calling someone by the wrong name, gendered word, or pronoun as a sign that he was somehow not as on top of things, forgetting information and details. He’d see it as a sign of a personal failing and as broadcasting something slipping through the cracks of his iron hold on information and so he’d be the last person to slip and call people the wrong things. Kaz’s pride is a fucking force to be reckoned with and to have that on the side of him getting somebody’s pronouns right is a hell of a thing.

Like ??,? The fact that my favorite thief crew would be inclusive gives me so much life. I mean @lbardugo has already woven such a beautifully complex world that is so truly detailed when it comes to diversity and the way personal identity is held by the characters when it comes to race, ethnicity, religion, sexuality, and class. And so for me to fill in that final gap myself as a reader with so much canon evidence to support that my fictional faves would be super chill with someone like me is my everything. Honestly.

tl;dr: Canon supports the notion that Kaz Brekker–scariest, cruelest, most hardened criminal in Ketterdam–wouldn’t be a transphobic shitbag, what excuse do you have?