#whether the person having the problem having the problem wants her help or not
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On the Matter of Quirk Counseling
So one of the hot-button issues of the fan base is the subject of Quirk Counseling. That it's this horrific practice done to "deviants" like Himiko to make them normal, and it's what turned her into the person she is today. And with the ending, people thought that Uraraka working to spread it out over the country was a terrible thing and was only going to make more problems. Naturally, this is something I disagree with. At least, to the extent the fanbase takes it.
We're told that Quirk Counseling is a program that helps the youth understand and adjust to living in modern society. However, as we see with Himiko and her flashbacks, this kind of process can end up isolating people who don't fit in with that society. A pretty grim perspective on the world. However, I don't think it's the most reliable one. This is the kind of perspective we get from Chitose, who is someone who is radically opposed to how society handles Quirks and wants to destroy it, and Toga, someone who was hurt by this same process. So I think that paints a specific picture of the practice. One that may not be entirely true.
Because in spite of being such a big part of a major villain, we know very little about what Quirk Counseling entails. We're told by Midnight that every kid goes through Quirk Counseling during elementary school. So every character in the series must have undergone this same process at some point. During Tamaki's flashback, we see something like this going on in middle school. People being taught how to use their Quirks, at least in a basic way. This is later reinforced during the Remedial Course Arc, where the whole point is the heroes helping to teach kids about their powers. All in all, it doesn't seem that terrible, and it seems to work with a lot of people in the world.
This all paints a different picture of what exactly Quirk Counseling entails. Because when we see it in action, it's mostly just teaching people how to use their Quirks and helping them understand their own powers. Which isn't a bad thing. Quirks can be very dangerous and wild, even from a young age. It's important you know how it works, whether it be how it functions or how to use it. Better yet, how not to use it. Because, as we have seen, the unchecked usage of Quirks is going to be dangerous for everyone involved. Values like this need to be put into kids at a young age to keep any kind of peace or stability in the broader world. And it seems to work.
Himiko is an odd case within the world. Someone whose Quirk had a potent effect on their interests and personality, more so than any other person we've seen. She is an outlier. A deviant. Yet she was still a little girl that needed help. Maybe, if she had gotten the right help, she wouldn't be the person she is today. And that is part of the tragedy of Himiko. That the concept of normality has been so enforced that they can't even hope to properly help Himiko. The problem wasn't the system itself. The problem came in its inefficiency to handle cases like Himiko. Outliers that couldn't handle possibly fit within the brackets of "normal." And when all that pressure comes down on someone, they will eventually break under it.
It's why I don't think that Quirk Counseling growing is the problem everyone tries to make it out to be. Uraraka's helping to expand the system that is meant to help and teach kids about their powers. We've seen how that can help troubled kids. The Remedial Course is the prime example of that, where it's something that works with the kids rather than trying to strongarm them. And with that system growing, it will help to prevent cases like Himiko. It can help the kids learn about themselves and their powers. It can show kids not how to be "normal." But what they're going through isn't something they have to be afraid of and can live with. Just as Himiko could have. Expanding this isn't disrespecting her. It's keeping other kids to suffer like she did.
#My Hero Academia#Not Quirks#Toga Himiko#Ochako Uraraka#Uraravity#Chitose Kizuki#Curious#MHA Meta#MHA Theory
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the problem is that it's so hard to really analyze anything about arcane, and draw any conclusions about the story, because of the way it was written and conceived in the first place.
to the people who're like "yeah season 2 was bad, but season 1 was a MASTERPIECE in story writing and PERFECT in every way", that's just not true. the cracks were already there in season 1. there's multiple things, especially overarching ones, that just don't add up, and several ways that the story progresses that seem like odd choices. the thing was that, to me, the rest of it was all so good... the small details, the contained scenes were so well done, so detailed, so touching, that i really believed that maybe those cracks were just hiccups after all, and it's not a big deal, and maybe they'll even make a lot more sense and all get tied up with a nice little bow in season 2 (ha)
to me, at this point, it seems obvious that the way season 1 came into being was that these three idiots (who should never be allowed to write anything ever again) wrote a script, that was so terrible that riot had to bring in help to fix it for them (cause they were that incapable) and then someone got handed their slop and told "save this as much as you can, but keep the main points the same", and save it THEY DID! but the overarching plot is still the original one. which is why there's this dissonance all across it.
season 1 often seems like it's trying to tell two different stories at once. the example that comes easiest to me is jinx's transformation from powder to jinx post time skip. to the people i know irl who watched it, me included, the difference between these two is jarring, to the point that it just doesn't seem realistic that powder would change that much. this is what most people's reaction to her transformation was. like, sure, she changed... but jinx is almost a completely different person. and we can sit here and analyze all we want, and say yeah, but look, in ep2 min37, powder laughs when an enforcer is hurt, so that shows that she is indeed attracted to violence even at this age, but like... first of all, im at this point fully convinced that these details were put in specifically for that, to attenuate the valley that is between powder's character and jinx's, and I also honestly feel embarrassed that i even have to do all of this at all.
other notable examples are whatever is going on between jinx and silco in their relationship. like, yeah, he was actually a good father to her... but actually, there's something weird going on between them... but actually, no... he was better than vander, but actually he was worse than vander and was actually the cause of everything bad in jinx's life..... and on, and on, because the literal story itself never actually makes up its mind on what it wants the relationship between these two characters to be. same as it never makes up its mind on whether powder was a cute, innocent kid who was just manipulated by silco, or if powder was born like that and was just looking for an opportunity to release her inner jinx. same way as it never makes up its mind on whether vi is a devoted sister, who would do anything to get powder back, as she herself says, or if she actually thinks this new enforcer chick she just met is kinda cooler, as her actual actions would indicate. does silco adopt jinx because he sees himself in her, or does he intend to use her as a weapon and then later on grows to actually care about her? there comes a point where "this is a complex story" just becomes an excuse for "we were actually working with three different ideas at once and we never really decided on which one we were gonna do and we kinda just prayed it would all work out somehow"
the one thing that arcane season 2 has on season 1 is that it doesn't suffer from any of these weird identity issues. it's bad and simplistic but it's bad and simplistic in its entirety and it doesn't ever seem interested in being anything else. the story has no continuity or congruence issues, except of course for the ghost of season 1 that haunts it, and especially haunts the writers, who so far have displayed nothing but dismay for the story that actually made this show so acclaimed, and have done all they could to bury it as much as possible in season 2.
now, personally, im a big death of the author truther. even more so in cases like these, where we're dealing with teams of people. power struggles happen in studios, and in writing rooms, and at every level of production. and these three people that have taken credit don't seem like the most emotionally (or intellectually) mature individuals.
so, to solve all these issues, just know that when im discussing or analyzing arcane, im going off the interpretation of the events that serves the story the most, and that leads to the most meaningful narrative and the one that is most worth telling. all of this weird lee and overton slop that snuck in im gonna be completely ignoring.
#arcane critical#the last part is only a little bit ironic#i hate this fucking trio man#how do these people get to write scripts for shows like arcane it's just not fair
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Imagine Two-Bit learning from Marcia how to have healthy coping mechanisms and not drink to make his problems go away.
Because before meeting Marcia, Two-Bit drank to solve most of his problems. Because he was such an anxious person, but he grew up being told that whatever he was worried about wasn’t important (by his dad). So, he turns to drinking because it lets him forget and it makes him less focused on his fears. And he can’t be focused on his fears because other people have it worse (his mindset). He can’t be focused on his problems because he has to lighten the mood with the gang, which includes three kids who just lost their parents, a kid whose parents are at each others throats so often and when they’re not they’re at his throat, a kid with no actual family, and a kid whose dad is ready to throw him out or hit him at any moment. So he needs to be the one to lighten the mood and bring laughter into their gang. He can’t be upset.
But then he meets Marcia. Marcia, who doesn’t judge him for being nervous or worried about something he thinks is stupid. Marcia, who lets him talk about anything and everything. Even if it’s something that isn’t happy or upbeat. She lets him be himself. So, he stops drinking as much. Partially because he knows it upsets her and she doesn’t like alcohol, but also because he doesn’t need it as much. Because if he’s nervous, he can go to her and her arms are open and waiting. And eventually, he kinda just stops all together. And when that happens, suddenly a lot more of the rocky relationships in his life start getting better. Suddenly, his sister is much more willing to spend time with him because she’s less scared that he’s going to become a deadbeat drunk. Suddenly, his mom is gentler and isn’t worried that her little boy is turning into something he shouldn’t be and she doesn’t want him to be. And Marcia was the reason. And so Marcia is welcomed in to the Mathews family with open arms. And it wasn’t easy to get Two-Bit to slow down or stop. But Marcia worked with him every step of the way to show him he didn’t need to hide behind a drunk facade to be liked. She reassured him that his friends, family, and her would still love him, even if he wasn’t always ok with being the comedic relief. She taught him to come to her if he was feeling nervous, instead of turning to a bottle. She showed him how she coped with anxiety and offered him other options. She showed him the ways that she felt better and he started picking them up.
Just Marcia teaching Two-Bit how to cope and accept love regardless of whether or not he was helping others feel better. Because sometimes, he couldn’t always be helping everyone else, sometimes, he needed help himself.
#the outsiders musical#the outsiders broadway#the outsiders#marcia meyrink#marcia the outsiders#two bit mathews#marbit
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How did they get together and how do they resolve their arguments (for Aoife and Hades! A curveball!)
Bruh, half of Rowan and Urianger's conversations are late night talks. They both tend to be night owls in the first place. That being said, if they don't remember to actually retire at some point (and if they don't stop each other) then they end up falling asleep in their chairs doing the good ol' fashioned "I'm just resting my eyes" bit.
Ohhhhh Minthe. Minthe needs her space. I think the actual distressing part about fights for Minthe is that she learns something about the other person that doesn't quite match her perspective. She's so detail oriented, how could she be wrong about her partner? (By losing the forest for the trees!) Eventually Minthe will settle down and make an offering, usually in an effort to fix the problem. I think Minthe created a strain of coffee for Ariadne to give her a better caffeine in take because Minthe thought she was too tired.
Thanks for the ask!
#ask meme#rowan argentas#urianger#aether and anatomy#azem minthe#azem ariadne#looooooooook long late night chats are like the building blocks of aether and anatomy#crucial#foundational#essential#and minthe likes to solve problems#whether the person having the problem having the problem wants her help or not#and hmmm i need to have her do that to hades at some point huh
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You know I have a cousin who is a trans woman who is visibly and openly trans online, and because she is my family member and I have known her all my life I think I can say on good authority that she is nothing close to a faultless person. I actually had a lot of problems with her growing up and she still often posts inappropriate and objectionable things online that perhaps make her a bigger target than just the fact that she is trans by itself. And I like know that she's quite an easy target and I see herself put herself online in ways that make me worried and concerned for the kinds of comments she gets. She has people scroll her public Facebook page and on any post, especially if it mentions being trans or queer, whether it is innocuous or not, she'll get all these laugh reacts, because Facebook transphobes are evil. But it also feels like, I just wish she'd stop posting like she does. This is not blaming her, and I know transphobes seek her out whether they at first find her saying something respectable or not. It's not fair at all. But I do very much see that she cannot resist feeding the trolls and it's just hard to fucking watch
#she goes through cycles of using and not using social media#i wish she would just use the block button like girl stop trying to justify yourself to everyone#THESE PEOPLE HATE YOU AND WILL NOT RESPECT YOU NO MATTER HOW YOU RESPOND#it's maddening to see specifically happening to a family member. it's never ok to witness#but that's not just any trans woman that's my cousin. i KNOW she has other issues to deal with#and i KNOW so much about her life and issues that i know this online hate isn't even the top of the list#but it can't be helping in fact i know it's not#these cyberbullies don't think of the ppl they attack as being human or having families at all#they don't give 2 shits about cruelty#i feel helpless to defend her#tales from diana#also sometimes she does say shit i straight up won't defend but she doesn't deserve abuse over#for instance she is actually very pro-life. which is a stance i find to be bigoted no matter who it's from#plenty of cis women i have no problem calling misogynists for wanting to outlaw abortion. it's fundamentally wrong#idk why she feels the need to speak on things like that since it does her no favors and makes her a bigger target#i mean obviously it will never affect her since she can't give birth. it is very much like stay in your lane#whether or not you have a uterus it's nobody's right to tell someone else they shouldn't have full legal possession of their own body.#there's really no need to be a transphobe about it to her. but of course they ARE#as well as any other vulnerable/personal information or opinionated stance she gives out#i feel so sorry for her
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my hot take about descendants is that NONE of the core four were ready for a relationship until maybe like, the third movie (rant in tags)
#they were still adjusting to living life without struggling to survive#a girl should not be jumping into a relationship the same week she just tried her first piece of non-rotten food lol#thats not to say I don't like the canon ships#but mal married literally the FIRST man she met in auradon. at 18.#and even as far as in descendants 2 we see them still struggling to adjust in different ways (mainly mal)#in d3 they seem to have fully assimilated into life in Auradon (as much as a VK can anyway)#so it makes sense for them to THEN seek out relationships if that's what they want.#but disney ofc wanted to act like romantic love just automatically fixes a person's problems ig?? as if a relationship wouldn't just be#added stress given the position the VKs were in in d1#not to mention dating just like. wasnt a thing on the isle (mal even says this)#and I get that the kids are craving to be loved because their parents didn't gaf about them. But I wish the first movie focused more on the#finding that love in each other than romantically with outside people. a sort of “they had love in them all along” moment.#and then this fandom loves to argue about whether Jarlos/Janelos was 'rushed'. at least Carlos (and Jay +lonnie) waited a few months before#throwing themselves into the dating scene. Poor evie had her heart broken within like 3 days of being in Auradon. no wonder she was willing#to help steal the wand lol.#Anyway to wrap up this rant I didn't even mean to go on#I just think that kids who have spent the first 14-16 years of their lives fighting to survive and being put through continuous trauma on a#daily basis don't need dating right away. they need THERAPY.#if anyone here has seen stranger things its kinda an El and Mike situation were its like. the girl grew up in a lab and fell for the first#boy in regular society who was kinda nice to her lol. thats how I view Mal and Ben#same with doug and evie. he was nicer than chad but he still fell for her for her looks and she still fell for him because he was the first#guy in auradon to be genuinely interested in her. also evie had a whole “I dont need a prince” arc and ended up with a man anyway?#my problem with janelos was always that Carlos never quite worked out his mommy issues or his anxiety. I feel like he'd be afraid of hurtin#her even though that boy wouldn't hurt a fly. and we see Jane get pretty stressed out herself- have you ever been in a relationship where#both of you have anxiety? cause it either goes really well (you help keep each other calm) or REALLY terribly (you make each other spiral)#I actually really liked Lonnie and Jay (though I feel like it would've had a bigger payoff if she was in d3. not sure why she wasn't but I#wont dunk on that because it couldve been smth to do with her actress). I think Lonnie is someone who can 'handle' Jay well and match his#energy. And I like the idea of Jay finding someone he's loyal to after being commitment-phobic for 1 1/2 movies and the whole first book lo#and ofc I have to throw this in here: any auradon kid the VKs get with is never going to grasp even half of what they went through.#this doesnt mean they can't try to understand and be empathetic. but it will always cast a shadow on VK/AK relationships.
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i’ve been writing nonstop for like six hours so here’s a meme that makes no sense to anybody but me
#the difference is that Acidalia was forced into power#she didn't have a choice in it and never really wanted it#so she sees it as a tool to enact change but mostly a powerful destructive force that corrupts the people who wield it#while the protagonists of my other WIP willingly chose to pursue power for themselves#they acknowledge that it can negatively impact people and relationships#but they mainly see it as a tool they can use to repair a crumbling empire and rebuild the world in their image#also Acidalia is just like. genuinely a good person#which is a problem because the nature of her job forces her to make tough decisions and occasionally do objectively bad things#but all she ever wants to do is help. so she's constantly panicking about whether she's doing right by her citizens#but the protagonists of my new WIP are more morally gray#they have some noble goals. but they also care deeply about their own interests and legacies#and they're willing to do more selfish things#anyway#i'm talking about projects that probably won't be finished for a million billion years so#feel free to ignore me
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#I love theater and technical theater and doing shows but also#every time I do a show I am reminded that I am disabled#that the expectations for my role are expectations for an able bodied person and that my role will not change to fit me or being disabled#it is so hard to be disabled on tech crew#and it’s even harder when you’re good at your job (because you don’t have the option of not being good at your job) because you’re always#needed for something. to help someone else. to solve a problem. anything#if you are competent then your job description automatically expands whether you want it to or not and you don’t have the option to not be#competent when you’re disabled. you don’t have the option to do anything but excel because anything less and you’re not good enough#it’s a catch 22. and I will never get a single break during a show because#even if it’s a break for lights it’s not a break for someone else and someone else is going to need help and you are the person who can help#you don’t get a break. those don’t exist for you. it doesn’t matter that you need one more than anyone else#and I’m stuck with an assistant lighting designer who thinks she knows how to program just by watching me alter cues for a few minutes#you cannot learn programming like that. especially when you’ve only been looking at my screen and not at the stage! you don’t know what the#different levels of light look like! you cannot understand what I’m doing if you do not see the stage!#she’s going to lighting design for a show and it’s going to have problems and someone else can deal with that because I am not going to#I get being busy but if you’re part of a show you show up. you go to the production meetings and the#designer run and you fucking show up during tech week! and that means showing up on time!#I don’t have an ALD#I have someone who did nothing is taking some of the credit for my work and putting it on their resume#I would care less about her lack of experience if she showed any initiative whatsoever#just. I am working so fucking hard on this show. I’ve gotten flare ups twice in two days because I’ve had to overexert myself#if you’re also putting in the time and effort then we work well together. but if you don’t then I have no use for you#also just. as someone who is trying to do their job the best they can and having to fight to be able to do my job#I will never understand the people who just show up and halfass it and call it a day because it’s easy for them to get there#it’s so incredibly difficult for me and I cannot afford to take that for granted
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we never talk about it ☆ op81
genre: humor, angst, yearning, massive crushes, and lots and lots of miscommunication, assistant!reader
word count: 11k
It's unwise—longing for someone like Oscar. While he's the epitome of someone anyone can easily fall in love with, you're the epitome of a devoted girl who will fall in love with him. You might not even care too much about all the heartbreak you endure along the way.
inspired by this !
cherry here!... based on real events.
Do you remember the day we first met?
The wind doesn’t do its job in blocking him out, the way you prayed and wished it would. You’re still able to catch the crack in his voice—a distant reminder of the way it once made you giggle. Even his nose is beet red, matching the Christmas lights. But apart from all that, you still hear him. You still see him.
You always have.
“A little bit. Yeah.”
He flinches, then tries to play it off with a soft smile. Like he doesn’t want you to uncover the slight hurt he feels. But he can’t read your mind. He never could. And that was the problem.
Oscar nods, feigning indifference. “I do. Remember it all, I mean. Think back to it quite often."
-
It’s utterly useless to try and ignore him, really.
His hair is too fluffy, his eyes are too bright, and his accent is making you want to flaunt the way some loony character would with a hand over their heart. It was honestly a tad bit demeaning.
But you can't help it. You admire the way his brown locks fall in a lousy manner when he towers down to sign the contract. You blush when his eyes get that twinkle in them. And you swoon over almost anything he says with a shy smile.
“You’re drooling.”
Mortified, you briskly run the back of your hand against your mouth before sending a harsh glare. Lando snickers. “Would you please stop?”
His jaw drops, theatrically. “You’re not actually into him—are you?”
He says it with a trace of humor, but also shock, and you can't help but have your mouth run dry. A loose grin starts to expand across his lips as you hurriedly shake your head. “O-of course not. Are you crazy?”
But if anything, you feel crazy. You must be, right? With every passing second of your heart beating faster and faster against your chest simply just by looking at the young Australian, you’re sure you fall straight into the category like some love fool.
Lando squints his eyes. “I don’t know.” He leans in straight into your face, nearly hissing. “Am I?”
“Am I interrupting?”
Flinching hard, you turn quickly to face Anastasia. You’d initially met the black haired girl back in 2019. As you started off as the Brits personal assistant, she took over as Carlos’ and later also Daniel’s. Over the course of time, you two came to be as close as sisters.
“No! Not at all,” you squeak, nervously before pushing the McLaren driver away and patting towards the open chair next to you. She giggles, rolling her eyes and adjusting herself. “How was the flight over?”
A shrug. “As good as it can get. Sat next to a silver fox, so I guess that must count for something, no?” Lando shudders. She leans in closer, plopping her head against your shoulder. “What’d I miss?”
“Not much.” Only, that’s not true. She missed the way he laughed awkwardly when the doors wouldn’t slide open and let him into the headquarters. She missed the way he rolled his R’s a little too hard when saying ‘sorry’. She missed the way he grabbed the pen with a certain glow on his face, like he almost couldn’t believe any of this was happening. Lazy fingers pat her head gently once before sighing. “He seems nice.”
“How do you know?”
You know because of the way he talks to everyone. Like he cares about what they have to say. Whether it’s about how great his career is going to be here in McLaren or if they introduce their kids to him via FaceTime. He always wore the same smile, talked in the same warm tone. So, could your guess be far off? Yes. It could be completely far off. But you would bet money that it wasn’t.
“Just a wild hypothesis.”
Her laugh isn’t too loud, not ridiculously so, at least, but the fact that it echoes is what makes it appear as such. Anastasia is quick to slap her hand over her mouth, the Brit turns fast to face her with panic evident in his eyes, and you simply blink with a shade of red slowly creeping towards your cheekbones.
Zak grins. “You three.”
“Oh, we’re out,” Lando mumbles in monotone, already grabbing your wrist and dragging you to the exit. You follow numbly, like you don’t have any strength left in your body.
“You’re leaving me?” Anastasia hisses.
“She’s my assistant,” he says like a matter-of-fact. “Where I go, she goes.”
“Oh, you Judas—”
“All of you,” Zak clarifies, narrowing his eyes over to you and the Brit. You gulp.
With a soft curse, Anastasia stands up, tall and firm, and makes her way over with all the confidence in the world. You frown, craving to be the same way, even just a small percentage. Instead, you have to be forced by the McLaren driver.
With every step, your head just spins faster because now, he’s more than real. You can smell his cologne. You can count all the moles that cover his face if you really wanted to. You can spot how his hair is still a bit wet, indicating an early shower.
He’s just becoming— too real.
“Lando, buddy, meet your new teammate!”
“Nice to meet you,” the blue eyed boy declares with a loopy grin, letting go of your hand in order to shake his.
“Likewise.”
Zak claps once. “Oh! And meet your personal assistant, Anastasia.”
“Here for anything you might need,” she cheers with a bright smile.
“Fantastic.”
A wave of silence overlaps your four before Lando clears his throat. “And even though you might not be working with her one-on-one, this is my Anastasia.” A snicker. “My assistant, if you will.”
“Nice to meet you—”
“Nice to meet you—”
You both freeze, hands intertwined for a second longer before abruptly letting go. He lets out a dry laugh while you do the same. The way your skin tingles makes you blush.
“This is fun and all, but we actually have somewhere to be,” the Brit claims with a suspicious look slashed across his usual laid back expression. You nod. “But we’ll see each other soon, man. Can’t wait to race together!”
In a flash, you two are out the door, leaving a dumbfounded Oscar blinking slowly.
-
“He fucks with you.”
“Excuse me?”
Another bench press. “As in, he likes you. He’s into you.”
You don’t dare ask who he is because you already know who the Brit’s referring to and that would only inflate your ego. Snapping your fingers, you narrow your eyes. “Focus. Two more sets left to go.” He groans, flipping you off.
It would be a lie to say that this didn’t make your self-esteem skyrocket. Could he be right? Could someone like Oscar ever lay eyes on you? Somewhere in your dreams, you’d like to say yes. Yes. That is a possibility. But the longer you think about it, the more unrealistic it gets.
You don’t have what others do. And that itself is enough to pop the bubble.
-
The start of the season is always tough.
“He’s extremely nervous.”
For some more than others.
You frown. “Really? But he’s usually so…relaxed.”
Anastasia shrugs, hair falling over her shoulder as she continues typing. “I mean, I tried talking to him but with everything I said, he’d just reply—'that's nice’. It was sarcastic, if anything. I would have laughed if I didn’t feel for him. Poor boy.” Her fingers freeze mid-air. “Wait—do you think you could talk to him?”
“I’m not sure that’s a great idea—”
“Come on! Maybe it’ll help him ease his nerves!”
“Ana—”
“Please.”
You huff. “Okay. Fine. Yeah. I’ll see what I can do.”
As soon as you knock, you almost want to turn away. Maybe it was all an exaggeration. Plus, it’s not like he’s going to die from having butterflies in his stomach. Yeah, surely he’ll be fine and he doesn’t really even need you to—
“Come in.”
He wasn't expecting you, that much you can tell by the way his brows go up. But he’s quick to erase the confusion, settling with a fond expression. “Hey.”
“Hi,” you squeak before cringing at the sound. He chuckles, returning to his warm-up exercises. “How are you feeling?”
Another chuckle, this time amused. “Anastasia sent you, didn’t she?”
“What?” A beat. “No.”
He hums. “Tsk. I’m a bit nervous, that's all.”
You lick your lips, kicking your foot up against the doorframe. What could you possibly say that she hasn’t already? If she couldn’t ease him, then how can you? The thought of messing up and making it worse makes your stomach churn.
“You’re going to do g—”
“Great?” He sighs, blowing his cheeks. “That’s exactly what she said.”
“And what’s wrong with it? She’s only trying to help.”
“No. I know she is, but…” He looks down onto his lap, pausing all movements. “Look, I appreciate you both. What you’re trying to do for me, but I can’t stand hearing what others think I want to hear.”
“It doesn’t do it for you?”
His eyes grow slightly wide with the way you go about and ask. He’s never seen you be anything other than sweet and reserved. But this—right now—is stern and very coach-like. Something and someone you aren’t. Not even close.
“It doesn’t,” he admits, finally looking away. “Never liked it. Always sounds too forced.”
You nod, crossing your arms. “Fine. I can tell you the truth. I can be truthful.” He perks. “Oscar, you’re a terrific driver.” He groans, covering his face with his hands. “But just because you’re great doesn’t mean you’ll be great all the time.” The Australian frowns, uncovering and looking up at you with attentive eyes. “You’re going to mess up. You’re going to be second, or third, or sometimes even twentieth, but that doesn’t matter, you know why?”
“Why?”
“Because you signed that contract, so you sort of have to suck it up, either way.” He lets out a loud laugh. Very unlike him. A weak smile threatens to fall as you try your best to push it back. “There’s going to be bad races, but there’s also going to be very good races. It all depends on you and how hard you work. Sometimes you’ll have a good car, a good strat, and others you’ll have a shitbox and a bad strat. That’s just the way this sport works, okay?”
Oscar blinks slowly, as if trying to decipher who you are, and that itself makes you dizzy. “I-I-I don’t care if you’re nervous, I don’t care if you’re sure—all we care is that you drive that car, and that you try your best no matter what. Can you do that?”
It’s foreign. The feeling in his chest. He’s not used to hearing any of this. As of recently, everyones been texting him to say how great he’s going to be. How far he’ll go. And while he was grateful for having unconditional support, he also dreaded hearing it sometimes because he doesn’t even want to picture letting any of them down. He’ll act like he’s fine, he’ll act like he doesn’t care—but none of that would be true.
The brunette tilts his head to the side, slightly squinting. “I can. I can always try my best. Even if I fall short.”
“Good.” A beat. “We all believe in you. No matter what, okay?”
A timid smile. “I know…”
He ends up having to retire the car by lap fifteen, but the most astonishing part is that he’s not even upset. He tried his best. He listened to every single advice his engineer would alert him with. He practiced long hours in the stimulator.
This is just the way things go sometimes. Just like you said.
-
“I’m bored. Can I get a ten minute break or something?” Lando grimaces, rolling his wrist like it's the worst pain in the world.
You hum, fixing the signed hats back into the box. With eyes screwed, you shrug. “Fine. But only ten! I’m serious. We need to have this done by one.”
“Yes! Ten—got it.”
He doesn’t come back in ten. For the matter, he actually goes missing.
You narrow your eyes towards the clock, watching as it clicks like some mockery. You’re going to strangle him. You vow at that very moment that you’ll strangle the Brit as soon as you lay hands on him. With one final huff of desperation, you stand up, rubbing your eyes. People frolic through the paddock—you’re sure you even catch a glimpse of Lewis being papped—but that’s not what catches all of your attention.
Instead, you find yourself leaning against the rail, squinting down to where the man of the hour sits, microphones huddled all around him like some interrogation. Anastasia smiles politely, back straight, and voice-recorder in hand.
It’s faint—you almost can’t hear a thing—but it’s just enough.
How does it feel to be back home? Enjoying it, no?
Oscar hums, straight brows slightly furrowed due to the bright sun, but just one adjustment of his hat makes that all go away. “Feels good. I’m able to sleep in my own bed, so that’s pretty cool. And yes. It may be a bit biased, but I am enjoying my time here more than the last two races.” Everyone chuckles.
Can we talk about your expectations for this weekend?
You can see him pause, and from where you’re standing, the way his fingers drum against his chair. “Well, I, uh…I hope for a good car.” The joke is supposed to be there, but you can tell everyone was expecting more with the way they murmur to one another. You wince.
Will raises the microphone up to his lips, along with his hand in order to catch the brunette’s attention. “I’m sure there’s been lots of people reaching out to you since this is your first home race, but has there been someone’s advice that has stuck like no other?”
Oscar smiles gently. “There has been, actually.”
You freeze, gripping the steel bar with anticipation. Your knuckles nearly feel like they’re about to snap, and you feel like you’re probably leaning a bit too far over the edge to hear it all, but you don’t even care. Will chuckles. “If it’s not too much to ask, would you mind sharing with us all? I’m sure it’ll help a lot of youngsters watching.”
Anastasia slides the recorder closer. Oscar visibly swallows. “I’m not sure I can. I never asked her for permission to talk about it. And quite frankly, I’d like to keep it between us.”
Will perks up. “Her?”
The black-haired girl is quick to whisper into his ear, turning the opposite way so no one can even attempt to read her lips. He nods, eyes trained forward like some guard. “Any more questions?” But everyone’s intrigued at this point, so all the questions that follow remain the same. Something that makes Anastasia panic and Oscar regret his choice of words.
“Can we get a name?” some blurts out, nearly seeming desperate to get the inside scoop.
Only, his face remains still, jaw slacked. “No.”
Will raises his hand. “Very well, we don’t have any right to know, but are you willing to share a bit about what she said?”
And it’s almost as if the Australian can foresee that the only way to get out of this situation is by giving them what they want. Even if it’s a stupid little crumb. He sighs, running a hand through his hair. “She told me to try my best. That’s all I can really do.”
The mix of photographers and journalists deflate. “I-I’m sorry,” Lawrence Barretto slides in with a light tone and an ever lighter smile. “Don’t mean to lessen its meaning, but isn’t that a common thing to say? To hear?” An awkward laugh. “I mean, I just thought it’d be something a bit more…deep. Inspiring, perhaps.”
Blood rushes to your cheeks and you’re grateful to whatever God may exist that you’re not down there. On the other hand, Oscar is a bit bothered by the innocent comment, but then realizes he doesn't have to be. They weren’t there. They don’t know just how much more you said. How upfront you were with him without sounding condescending. Something most people did without even realizing.
The brown eyed boy spares a smile. “Like I said—some things I’d like to keep between her and I. And even if it was just that, it’s the way she said it.” A beat. “It’s quite a lavish thing to have. A sincere person to talk to, I mean.”
Will tilts his head suspiciously. “It appears she might be someone special to you, yes?”
The Australian freezes at the unwanted interpretation. Suddenly, the atmosphere is far too crowded. He lets out a forced chuckle, rolling his neck before messaging it gently. “Well, yes. I’d agree.”
A mix of giddiness and shock rushes through your veins as you refrain yourself from jumping up and down with excitement.
“You’d be lucky if you had her as a friend too.”
-
“Is everything okay?”
Biting down on the churro he had gifted you as an apology for not getting back on time, you growl. “Yes. Why wouldn’t it be?”
Lando raises a thick brow. “Dunno. Maybe the fact that you’re moping.”
Your jaw goes slack, immediately turning to face him. “I am not moping.”
The sound he lets out indicates he doesn’t quite believe you, but is choosing to let it go. Also, he doesn’t want to see your patience run out, too scared of what you might do. The curly haired driver plops down onto his bed that stands in his motorhome, closing his eyes. You nearly envy the indifference in him. The lack of worry.
“I can hear your teeth clenching. Gross.”
A grunt. “I’m gonna go grab a coffee. Need anything?”
“Only a nap. It’s a good thing you’ll be gone.” He turns over to his side, bringing your jacket over his face to block out any light. You bite the air, swinging silently for a minute or two before exiting the cramped room.
The sun hurts, you remember thinking, but the upcoming migraine you’re getting is even worse. You should be used to this by now, given you’ve suffered from them since elementary, but based on the way you zig zag without meaning to is enough proof to know that you’re not. Everyone's voices are suddenly muffled, even the sound of engines roaring is as soft as a feather. You wince, massaging your temples as if that might help.
Woah, are you feeling alright?
“I’m fine,” you respond meekly, to who even knows. You wave them off rudely. “I’ll be fine. Just. Leave me alone.”
Anastasia frowns, all while fanning your face. “No. You need to lay down.” She nudges the Australian, who up until now, you had no clue he had his arm clung around your waist. If you weren’t too busy feeling like shit, you’d definitely be making a fool out of yourself. Her green eyes fill up with worry. “I’m gonna go look for a paramedic.”
“You’re doing too much,” you slur, body letting loose and making the brunette shriek as he grips you harder, trying to keep you upright.
A deadpan expression. “Oscar, take her back to your motorhome and have her lay down.”
He nods, hesitantly. “Y-yeah, okay. Okay.” Once she runs off like a headless chicken, you let out a dramatic gag. Sharp brows knit together with horror. “Do I smell bad?”
A giggle. “No. As a matter of fact, you smell rich.”
With his arm still wrapped around you securely, and warm eyes flickering from to you back to see where he’s heading, he grins, eyes crinkling. “Rich? That just so happens to have a scent?”
You purse your lips, wincing at the fact that your peripheral vision has gone completely dark. “Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe I’m a terrific liar and I’m only stroking your ego for my benefit.”
Another chuckle. “Benefit? What benefit may that be?”
Tsk. “How else am I gonna get you to take me to bed?”
The Australian instantly chokes hard on a string of his own saliva, causing you to flinch at the loud sound. Loud to you, at least. He apologizes, but not before taking a glance down, like it’s the first time meeting you.
As soon as you lay down on the miniature mattress, you release a groan. Even just having your eyes closed makes you dizzy. You let out a loud groan, kicking your feet against the cushion in desperation.
“That bad?”
“That annoying.”
And even though you can’t see him, he nods, internally freaking out, trying to think of ways to help. “Does this happen to you often?”
“Yes.”
He nods, sheepishly. “W-what do you normally do? You know? To help?”
Tossing over to lay on your side, you pinch your eyes, grinding your molars. For a minute, you sort of thought your teeth might crack. Everything about this situation was becoming unbearable. “My mom, she, um…she’d normally braid my hair. It helped sometimes. Others it didn’t.” Messy hair dangles over your face as you let you out a loud exhale, as if you were in the middle of releasing some demon. “I moved too much, she said.”
Oscar smiles, coming across like a faint memory locked in the back of your mind. “I-I-I can try…” Loopy eyes flicker up to face him, and he’s quick to scrunch his nose. The sight alone makes you breathe easier, though he doesn’t know that. Of course he doesn’t. “Only if you want me to…”
“You know how?”
“Sort of? When I was younger, I used to sit across from my sisters at the breakfast table. I was bound to learn a thing or two.”
The subtle proud smile makes your heart beat flutter, smitten at the insight to his childhood. You wish you knew more. Like what was his favorite show? Did he have any imaginary friends, just like you did? Or maybe his favorite superhero? But you swallow all those questions down your throat as soon as he kneels down next to you. The whiff of soft musk distinctively adds to your headache, but you’re too focused on him for something as dumb as that to matter.
“Just…close your eyes.”
Taking one last glance at him, you comply, lashes fanning slowly before going completely dark. You can still hear him adjusting, you can feel him take your hair into his hands, but nothing makes you stop breathing like his touch that grazes your cheek.
It’s almost ghostlike—doesn’t really stay on the same spot for too long—but you know it’s real. Long fingers calmly push strands of hair behind your ear, tranquility expanding over your body. The slight tickle it causes helps ease your pounding migraine, little by little.
“Are my hands too cold?” he whispers, not trying to intrude, but at the same time, wanting to know. You twist, bottom lip jutting out. Not at all. Keep going. And he does. He ends up tangling your hair a bit, because as it turns out, he doesn’t remember much, but he’s sure to delicately fix his mess, brows drawn in with heavy concentration.
As soon as your hair is back to flowing free, he relaxes, wincing a bit at the pain in his knees. Your hair feels soft. Just what he would imagine a cloud would feel like. For a second, he begins to wonder, who’s this really for? He feels like this might be soothing him more than you.
Just then, his finger catches on a knot, and he freezes, stopping all movements. “Holy crap, I am so sorry, I—”
You let out a low whimper, but don’t do so much as bat an eye. You’re sound asleep. The brunette lets out a breath of relief, falling back to sit on the ground.
Your face is a bit squashed—and you’re drooling just a tad bit—but for some odd reason, he finds himself admiring. You’re full lips. You’re lashes. God, even the way you breathe. He feels a tender smile itching, but it never truly gets to see the light of day, because before he knows it, the door is swung wide open.
Anastasia stops dead in her tracks. “What happe—is she asleep?”
Oscar opens his mouth, then snaps it shut. He does this a couple of times, awkwardly turning to face you and his assistant, back and forth, back and forth. “She, um…just did. A minute ago.”
She pouts, scratching her head. “Weird. Usually when this happens it prolongs for at least ten minutes before it gets any better.” The green eyed girl sheepishly waves the group of paramedics away. A trail of sighs echo as they turn away. As soon as they’re gone, she gently shuts the door, then tippy toes towards the edge of the small bed. Neat brows furrow. “At least she’s feeling better, no?”
Brown eyes follow her gaze. “Yeah. At least.”
-
Lando ends up throwing—and according to him— “The World’s Coolest Jamboree”. You beg for him to call it anything but jamboree, but he’s too attached to it by the time he sends the last text invite, which so happens to be to the rookie driver.
“Has anyone RSVPed?” you question over his shoulder. He’s in the middle of mixing some mysterious liquid, but by the looks of it, doesn’t look any good. You grimace.
He lets out a bleh before dropping his utensils. “No one RSVPs these days. They either show up, or they don’t.”
A slow nod. “So, you don’t know who’s coming?”
“Not a clue. But most likely everyone.”
You scoff. “How are you so sure?”
He gives you an ‘are you kidding me?’ type glare before sending a sly grin. “First of all, it’s my party. They’d be crazy to miss out. And second of all…it’s only the biggest, funnest, coolest jamboree!”
“Funnest is not a word.”
“And party-poopers aren’t welcomed.” You gasp, smacking his chest harshly. He lets out a snicker, picking up a bag of ice and spilling it into the glass bowl. “But I’ll make an exception. Just this once.”
“Just this once,” you mimic before dipping your pinky in. He instantly slaps your hand away. Smacking your lips, you let out a yelp at the bitter taste. “This tastes like ass. God—not even Daniel will drink this, and that guy drinks anything in his way. I’m surprised he hasn’t been accidentally roofied.”
Lando claps his hands with amusement. “God forbid. And please, pay your respect to Lando’s Best Worst Decision.” A beat. “™.”
“™?” you deadpan. “What? Are you planning on adding a trademark to this sewage water?”
“It’s good, okay?” Mixing the clear liquid once more, he smiles fondly down at it. “And maybe. I’m seriously considering it.”
You sneer, already walking away.
He ends up being right. Not even an hour later, the party is in full swing. Sure, a couple drivers aren’t able to make it, but it’s still jammed packed. It's honestly a miracle to get through the Monaco flat.
You’re still sober?
Laughing, you nod, raising your water up in the air like some toast. Daniel frowns. “Considering I have to make sure my number one client doesn’t make any bad choices tonight, then nope. Can’t have a sip of alcohol.”
Brown eyes flutter slowly. “I’m sure there’s other beverage choices. Have you tried Lando’s Best Worst Decision?” He leans in, winking. “™.”
“Oh no. Don’t tell me you actually like it?” He shrugs and you shudder in disgust. “I’m sure I saw him add ten energy shots and God knows what else.”
“No wonder I feel kinda funky.” Your face drops. “Hey, if you pass out, can I crash tonight?”
“Daniel!” you groan, covering your face. “I swear, I’m going to spill that stupid drin—” Only, Daniel is gone. Craning your head, you circle the room. From where you stand, you’re able to see Carlos and Lando taking part in a heated round of pool, all while Charles sways back and forth, infamous red cup in hand.
Marching over to the kitchen island, you pick up the glass bowl and carry it over to the sink before tipping it over. You huff, hair fanning across your nose.
“Stupid, stupid boys—”
“Hey.”
You shriek, dropping the bowl, and wincing at the sound of glass shattering.
Oscar grimaces. “Shit. Sorry. Are you hurt?”
“No.” You sigh. “Lando’s gonna kill me.”
Grabbing the nearby broom, the Australian sweeps carefully while knitting his brows. “Why?”
“It’s a family heirloom.”
“A glass bowl?”
You giggle. “I wonder why too.”
Despite the blaring music, and constant chattering, the room feels rather silent. You fiddle with the hem of your dress, and that seems to catch his eye as it dawns on him that he hasn’t really seen you in anything other than your usual uniform. To be fair, you could say the same. He likes it.
You clear your throat. “Halfway done. How do you feel?”
He sips on his water, jaw clicking before settling with a sharp tsk. “Good. I think I’m finally getting the hang of it. Anastasia even congratulated me the other day when I diverted a series of questions with ease.”
Impressed, you raise your brows. “Bravo. Wish that was the case with Lando. I swear, sometimes I think he does and says things to make me look bad on purpose.”
“He should stop,” he says with a goofy smile. “Does he not know how lucky he is to get to call you his assistant?”
You blush. “Best friend, actually. I’ve been promoted ever since I pretended to be his girlfriend last New Year's Eve.”
The brunette inches forward with curiosity. “Wish to clarify?”
You hop onto the island, fixing your dress and crossing your legs. “Don’t tell him that I told you any of this, but I secretly think he was embarrassed of not having a midnight’s kiss. Especially since his ex was there with her new boyfriend. Talk about the unexpected.”
His chest tightens. “You two, um…kissed, then?”
“Yes,” you confirm with a childlike grin, and for some reason, it makes him want to puke. “Oh God, I haven’t thought about this in forever!”
He pretends to find interest in the crowded room, but really, it all remains on you. “Was it any good?”
You blush this time and he swears he’s close to walking away. “Yes and no. I mean, it wasn’t bad, but it just didn’t feel right.”
He perks up then, floppy hair bouncing at the sudden speed. “Really?” He coughs, then fixes his watch, training his eyes towards the floor. “Erm, I mean, is that so?”
A nose scrunch. “It felt like kissing someone you’re not supposed to. Which I suppose is true. We’re better off as friends.” He relaxes. “Thinking about it, we might’ve gagged each other's mouths.” You grimace. “If that doesn't show our discomfort, then I don’t know what will.”
“Good to know.” Oscar rubs his arm, up and down, then steps closer to you. You blink. “Hey, I was meaning to ask—”
Strippers? I didn’t order any strippers.
Hire, a male voice interjects. He means to say he didn’t—hire—any strippers.
“Son of a…” You wince apologetically, to which he shrugs. Don’t worry. Go. Biting your lip, you nod, rushing to the living room, where Lando, Daniel, and a bunch of other randoms circle the almost nude girls with long legs.
“I mean, I won’t turn you away, ladies,” the Brit mumbled, already wrapping his arms around their waists. They all giggle, inching closer until he’s a blushing mess.
You snap your fingers, pointing towards the exit. “All of you need to leave.”
Is that your sister? the one with a cowboy hat whispers into his ear. He quickly shakes his head, narrowing his eyes at you like a deadly weapon.
“No. That’s his girlfriend,” Daniel yodels, face pressed up against the couch, admiring the group of girls. “But they’re in an open relationship.”
“I’m not his girlfriend—”
“She’s not my girlfriend—”
Oscar’s jaw clenches, eyes focused on the entire commotion. The older Australian rolls his eyes. “Right. We don’t talk about it.”
“Would you stop trying to help?” you shoot back, sarcastically, and clap your hands as if you’re rounding up a new high school cheer. “I need you all out. You want money? Fine. He’ll give you money,” you declare, signaling towards Lando.
“Hey,” he groans, instantly letting go and stepping closer to you. “They haven’t even done anything to earn it….”
Your eye twitches. “I swear to God—”
“Deal,” the redhead shoots out. “But we need a moment to come to an agreement. You know? On how much we want to ask for.”
“Perfect,” you chirp, rolling your heels. “Take out your wallet, Big Boy.”
“You used to be fun.”
“And you used to be terrified over a pair of tits when I first met you. Whatever happened?” Lando blushes profoundly before pushing you away. “Want them gone, Lando, gone!”
“Yes! Jesus Christ—let me deal with this.”
“I’m done,” you promise with your hands raised up in surrender. “But just remember what happened last time.” He frowns, cocking his head to the side. You wiggle your brows. “São Paulo.”
Color drains his face before letting out an unhinged laugh and motioning you away. You giggle, heading back to where Oscar stands.
“I see what you mean,” he announces. What? “How he can have a bit of a headache.”
“See! I told you! Four years of this!” A dramatic yawn. “I’m tired.”
A string of boo’s follow once the strippers prance out the door, waving all their money in the air. Specifically Daniel, who genuinely looks upset to see them go. Oscar leans down against the counter, the proximity between you becoming smaller. “You should get some rest, then.” But he selfishly doesn’t mean it. He wants you to stay—to keep talking to him.
You let out a snort, grabbing your sides. “I mean, I'm tired of being Lando’s assistant. It’s a full time job, y’know?”
“Oh.” He stands up straight again. “Right. Of course.”
You purse your lips, looking down to your shoes. “But that was actually quite thoughtful.”
She thinks I’m thoughtful, he internally swoons because that must be a good sign, right? Not everyone is thoughtful, but he is, and that must count for something. Gathering all the strength he has left—which is not much considering you blink up at him like some angel—he licks his pink lips. “Back to what I was going to say earlier before you left—”
“I wasn’t trying to step on him! I already said I was sorry!” you hear a familiar voice, instantly turning to find Anastasia kicking Daniel’s face back into place, well, since he now lays asleep on the floor. You curse beneath your breath, jumping off the island once again.
“His head did a complete 360!” Yuki accuses, clearly panicked. “That's not normal, is it?”
“No, it is,” Pierre replies with a bored tone. “I’ve seen it happen before.”
Crouching down next to the curly haired driver, you jab his cheek before motioning Oscar and Anastasia closer. “Help me carry him to the guest room,” you instruct, already taking off your cardigan.
The black haired girl is quick on her feet, grabbing the Australians right leg as you grab the left. Oscar, however, swallows hard at the amount of cleavage you’re suddenly displaying, but instantly snaps out of it when both you and Anastasia blink back at him. He picks up the Alpha Tauri driver’s upper body before puffing.
You blush bright pink at the sight of his muscles pulsing against his t-shirt. “I-It’s just around the corner.”
As soon as you make it into the room, you three carefully place Daniel onto the bed, to which he squirms before flipping over and snoring away. You motion a finger over your lips before pushing them both out. Gently closing the door behind you,you let out a breath of relief.
Anastasia lets out a whistle. “Surprisingly not that heavy.”
Oscar scoffs. “Easy for you to say. I had to carry most of his weight.”
She shrugs, hugging you hello and apologizing for being so late, and you’re quick to reassure her that it’s fine, though she missed the chance to see strippers give Lando a tough time. She sneers. “I didn’t even know there existed strippers in Monaco.” And then she’s off, clapping loudly at the sight of Lando giving out a round of jello shots. You sigh, rubbing your temples.
“I-I’m sorry. What were you going to say?”
He freezes. “Oh. Just that—” He panics. “Only that I like your shoes!”
You blink, deflating from within. But you try to cover it up with a soft smile. “Thanks, I guess?” Orbs flicker down toward your white Sambas. “Lando says they are overrated, but I like ‘em.”
He nods. “Yeah. I like them too.”
-
It happens one Friday afternoon—the decision.
You’re in between races, you’re in between headaches, and you’re ready to self-implode. So, before any of that happens, you make your first decision. To go on a walk.
It’s getting rather chilly these days, something you love, but also hate. You love it because there is a certain coziness that comes along with it, but you also hate it because you can’t always be cozy, so you’re left shivering. Much like now. But to be fair, this was your own choosing.
The pounding that takes over your head lessens the longer you stroll, the longer you breathe actual fresh air. You don’t really think much, you mainly remain blank, but the sound of tires screeching rips you away. Squinting hard, you catch a glimpse of a lady with grocery bags flipping off the fellow driver, who shares nothing but an apologetic smile before driving off.
“What happened? Do I have something on my face?”
Dusting your nose, then your cheek, you blush faintly. You instantly assume it’s the powdered donuts fault—the one you had gobbled up in a hurry during the drive back to the paddock. It was an early morning, and no one really made it on time when it came to early days, but you always did. And so did Oscar. So, a sleepy Zak gave you a wad of cash, and sent you two to the nearest donut shop.
The Australian shakes his head, blinking straight ahead. “N-no, I was just checking my blind spot.”
That only makes you blush harder because in what crazy world would he be looking at you?
A single nod. The car is quiet apart from the sound of his hands moving against the steering wheel, and the sound of the blinker clicking. It’s gloomy, too. You clear your throat. “I love it when it rains.” He hums, calmly, encouraging you to continue. “It just makes me happy.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm.” You purse your lips. “I sort of wish I were home. That way I can snuggle near the window and fall asleep to the sound of light drizzle.”
The brunette quirks a brow towards the road. “That sounds nice. Like…really nice.” A pause. “Why can’t you do that here, though?”
Here—here means where you are right now. Here means this place that’s not home. Here is not close to being enough, but he doesn’t figure that one out. You blink, dragging your finger along the pink box sitting on your lap. “Trust me, I’ve tried.” A small shrug. “But it’s just not the same, y’know? There’s always something missing.”
He doesn’t waste a moment in asking. “What do you think that is?”
Taken aback by his inquiry, you let yourself surmise for a second or two before licking your lips. “Maybe a pup. To keep me company”
He semi-frowns, cocking his head to send you a deadpan expression. “A dog?”
Now it’s your turn to frown, sending him a glare. “What were you thinking?”
The red light lets him take focus on you. “Dunno. A boyfriend, maybe?”
You’re sure you’re nearly as tomato red as the light staring at you both. “What? You instantly just assume I don't have one already?”
He freezes. “Well, I, um…t-that’s not what I meant—”
“Look, I know I’m not a guys’ typical ‘dream girl’, but sheesh I’m not that unlovable. At least, I hope not, but now you’re making me second guess. I mean, your opinion must indicate everyone sees me as some sort of lonely widow.”
Oscar shakes his head, adamantly. “I don’t see you as such.” A slow pause. “A lonely widow, I mean. I find your words to not be all that true, really. You’re nice. You’re persevering, You’re beautiful. And you have a good heart.” The light translates back to green, and you’re freakishly thankful, that way he can’t see you burn up. “You could easily be anyone's dream. Whoever makes you think otherwise is a phony.”
It’s getting harder not to laugh—most likely out of skeptic shock—but you refrain. He’s simply being kind with you, but that doesn’t stop you from nearly going into cardiac arrest. His words should have been labeled with a warning.
“Guess this world is filled with lots of phonies.”
He scoffs. “There shouldn’t be. Not when it comes to a girl like you.”
Your breath catches. “Os—”
All of a sudden, the car comes to a harsh stop, sending you flying, but not the Australian, who remains sitting up straight. An older man flips him off before riding off on his bike. You both breath hard, turning to face each other.
“Are you okay?” he questions, voice laced with worry.
You nod, slightly dazed. “I, um—yeah. Are you?”
A nod. “I didn’t even see where he came from.”
A weak laugh finally erupts. “Blame it on the poor innocent man— clever.”
Brown eyes soften. They flicker from your orbs back to your pouty lips. He’s only checking if you’re okay, of course. You send him a reassuring bow and he releases a heavy breath.
“Guess I was too focused on my blind spot, once again.”
The next decision comes when you opt in to join your neighbor, Mr. Lennon, for a cup of tea after he finds you shivering. By that time, it’s raining hard, you're soaking wet, and it only makes sense to accept his kind offer.
“Mint. To hopefully push back any upcoming cold. God, what were you thinking?”
You let out a laugh. “Not much. That’s why I was aimlessly roaming.”
“What about now?”
You halt, mug raised up to your chapped lips. “What about now?”
He smiles, softly, mixing his own tea with a heavy spoon of honey. “Did the walk help? Were you able to get the wheels rolling?”
Now you giggle loudly. “That’s not very nice! The wheels are working just fine, thank you very much.”
The light scent of pine trees enter the room as soon as he stands up to open his window, the sound of soft rain singing to you as some much needed therapy. “So? What were you pondering about out there?”
“I wasn’t pondering.”
“Walking alone in the middle of a thunderstorm?” A sore laugh. “Been there. Done that. There’s always something on someone’s mind when that happens. Which isn’t often, or usual, so that must mean you’re really stuck up on something.”
“Or someone,” you mumble beneath your breath. His brows dart up, and you sheepishly settle the mug down. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.”
You blink. You don’t really talk about him out loud. Not with Lando. Not with Anastasia. Not even with your own reflection. Everything has always remained with you. A place you knew to be safe because you made it safe. But Mr. Lennon’s eyes prove to you that he’s lived enough lives—enough scenarios—to maybe understand. Even just a fraction. He watches you visibly gulp. And he knows that look. The confusion, the yearning.
“I’m in love with this boy.”
He hums, leaning back against his wooden chair. “There’s always a boy.”
You look down. “He’s a friend of mine, which makes everything much worse because I can’t ruin that. But for the first time in all my years of living…” Round, glossy eyes stare back at him with a hopeless expression. “I really—really—want to.”
He’s attentive, he listens like some frozen statue, and maybe that’s what fuels your courage to continue speaking. “My entire life, I’ve had crushes, sure, but I’ve never loved someone. Not seriously. So, of course I’m caught off guard when I do feel that for someone who I’m not even in a relationship with.” A playful snort. “God, I feel so stupid.”
The silence that lingers is comforting. Your nerves flow away with the rain, and you feel at peace. Quietly, he clears his throat. “Can I tell you a story?”
A soft sigh. “I’m all ears.”
Gray brows furrow as if trying to recover a distant memory. “I once loved a boy, too.” Your eyes widen. Sure, you knew he was never married, never even had a kid, but you never thought of any reason as to why not. He nods, faintly. “Not many know, and not because I’m ashamed, not by any means…” A single beat. “But because real, sincere feelings are easier to ignore. Because who wants to deal with reality, right? Who wants to confess and be turned away like some dog at your door?”
Exactly, you think, nodding along. “Everyone is always going to be scared of something, but avoidant people like us are terrified about the what-ifs.” He sends a wink. “And I’m living proof that being that way won’t get you nowhere. And you'll realize sooner or later in life that you’d rather be nowhere with someone you love, than nowhere…” His eyes circle the nearly empty kitchen, despite living there for the past twenty years. “...all alone.”
Your chin wobbles. “You know you have me, right? I’m always next door.” A wet laugh follows. “Anyways, I might even join you in this lonely life, eh? Doesn’t sound half bad if I’m doing it with you.”
Tender eyes close slowly before blinking back at you. “No. I want you to be the complete opposite from me. Be different. Tell him how you feel. Even if it costs you a broken heart, tell him. Because I’m telling you right now that a broken heart is always better than the constant desire that will always follow you like the devil.”
A warm droplet rolls down your cheek as you sheepishly laugh, but he doesn’t judge. He never has. Instead, ever the true gentleman, he hands you his handkerchief. “Did you ever get the chance to tell him that you…”
His wrinkles imprint more vividly as he breathes out. “I did, but it didn’t really make the difference I had hoped for. He was already married to someone else.”
A loud sob escapes. “That’s not f-fair. You deserve to be happy with the man you love.”
“I do. But you know what?” You rub the tears away, eyes connecting. “I’ve made peace with the consequences of my own actions.”
By now the rain has died down, and so have you. With one last smile, Mr. Lennon gives your cold hand a soft squeeze.
“Learn from my mistakes, won’t you?”
-
That same night, as you cried over a bottle of wine, you made your third and final decision. And you would execute it all the next time you saw him, no matter the outcome.
But now that you spoke about it once to someone, you felt almost invincible. Which is why you called Lando.
You what?
A wince. “You can’t tell him, okay? I’m legitimately trusting you with this!” He opens his mouth, but you’re quick to signal him off. “Including Ana.”
“Wow. I thought she’d know.” You shrug because you don’t really have an explanation for not having had confided in her, but you know deep down that you’re not really into playing a game of Cupid, and that’s exactly what she'd turn this into. The Brit nods, sympathetically. “Alright. I won’t tell a single soul.”
“Thank you.”
“Are you going to tell him how you feel?”
His question comes out hesitant—like he’s afraid of scaring you away from the possibility—but it doesn’t. Instead, you nod, to which he’s extra surprised because you’ve never been the kind to. “That’s the main reason I told you any of this. Because I wanted to ask you if you knew if he has a girlfriend or not? Someone he’s trying to pursue? I’d hate to…intervene.”
Lando let’s put a soft smile, dimples imprinting neatly onto his face. “I mean, he’s particularly private—you know him—but I’ve never heard him mention having a girl. It doesn’t seem like he does. Go for it. What do you have to lose?”
“My dignity? A good friend?”
Silently, he grimaces because even he can see how much this all means to you—how much you’re scared. So, to boost up your confidence—which is something he definitely doesn’t lack—he flashes a loopy grin. “He probably likes you, anyways.”
You come to a fast halt. Suddenly, painting your nails isn’t your top priority. “Really? You think so?” He nods, and you can’t help but smile back. “What’d he say?”
“Well, as I already stated before, he keeps his things locked up pretty well. But I do recall one time…” He closes his eyes harshly. Then, he snaps his fingers loudly. “I believe in Hungary. He was on a high. And we shared a bottle of champagne to celebrate. So, he sort of let loose. Like insanely loose.”
“And?” you push, eagerly trying to get whatever he has stuck in his throat out of him. The green eyed boy snickers.
“He wasn’t very clear, but he did say he had a crush on a girl. Someone he really wanted to get to know. But that things were a little bit difficult.” You nod, urging him to continue. “I asked why, and he said it was because she had a good heart, or something of that sort? Good intentions? Can’t remember—and that he didn’t want to ruin it.”
Your breath hitches.
And you have a good heart. You could easily be anyone’s dream.
-
Ironically, you’re huddled in Lando’s flat once again when it happens. Well. Almost happens. It’s filled with a few McLaren members because he insisted on hosting a nice brunch. And it was. Nice, you mean.
“Pretty,” Anastasia says, sending a soft smack towards your ass. You yelp, swatting her hand away, and pulling your skirt downward. She snickers. “You should tie your hair up more often. Let’s everyone admire such an angel face.”
“Stop it,” you hiss, but can’t hide the pink flush. “But thank you.”
She grins, eyes crinkling. Black hair sways as she moves to the beat of the music, nursing her drink. “Nice to have a break…”
“Definitely.”
At some point, she slithers away, leaving you all alone on the balcony. Which was quite lonesome until he came along. Oscar scrunched his nose, meekly. “Sorry.”
“It’s alright. Don’t own this place, do I?”
He lets off a raw chuckle. Deeper than when you first met him, and you come to the realization that a lot about him has changed. His hair is longer, his neck is thicker, and his shoulders are wider. But his smile and eyes remain the same. Boyish.
“Thinking?”
You sigh, admiring the ocean set out right in front of you. “Thinking, yes. A lot these days.”
And if he’s patient enough, he’d notice the way your hands shake. Tiny vibrates, but still. He’d notice the way you bite down on your lip, brushing it along the way. He’d notice the way you blink feverishly, like even the wind hurts.
And he is. He is a patient person. So, he does notice.
“Do you know what song this is?”
Brows furrow, deep in thought. And he’s quick to note that the ticks you had are coming to an easy halt. Mentally, though, you’re cursing yourself out because you do know. You do know the song that flows nicely into your ears, but simply having him next to you is what’s making you forget. How dare he have that kind of power over you?
“I know it,” you start. “But I can’t seem to remember right now...”
The brunette gently nods his head along to the beat. His eyes close, and his hair delicately tussles, and suddenly he’s the only thing you see. “Sex,” he says. You blush, ripping your gaze away before he catches you in the act. Oscar laughs. “It’s Sex by The 1975. How could I forget?”
“Oh yeah.”
The guitar screeches when the volume somehow gets louder, despite not being inside. “Would have killed me not to get it right. My sister listens to it all the time.”
Plump lips pressed together. “You have a sister?” But you know the answer to that question, of course you do. You’re a girl. You’ve done your research, even when you pinched yourself not to.
He nods. “Three, actually. Talk about a headache, am I right?”
And it’s almost nostalgic—your laugh. Like it might be one he heard in his past life, but in his current one, can't remember. But it’s okay if he doesn’t because at least he knows he can learn it. And he has.
“You look really pretty when you laugh that way. Insanely so.”
You can’t seem to register his words. The way they come off as soft and ginger as they could possibly get. As if he really means it. And for the first time since your first interaction with him almost two years ago—you sort of believe he might.
“You’re just saying that?” you question as some test, round eyes challenging him into finally spitting out the truth. The same truth you carry. He shakes his head, taking a step closer.
“I mean it.”
Like a sudden magnet, you two are hesitantly connecting closer and closer together before either of you could stop it. Not that either of you would. The Australian towers over you, almost caging you like some endangered species he’s afraid of slipping away and going extinct.
You swallow, lashes fluttering, and he smiles at the sight—melts. You’ve always been reserved. Quiet. Shy. And so has he, so he can’t really judge you, but he’s willing to be different—just once in his life—to get what he’s been wanting for a long time now.
His eyes follow your lips. Admires how plump they are. How they’re the perfect shade of pink. So, when he leans in and you don’t pull away? He thinks he might explode with the need to kiss you. One time. If he’s lucky, just—once.
“You’ve always been my dre—”
“There you two are!” Anastasia cheers, zigzagging to you both as an apologetic Lando follows right after. By now, Oscar has jumped far away from you, and you’re left feeling empty and lost, blinking at an alarming rate. “We’ve been looking all over!” A hiccup. “What were you doing?” Your lips remain open but Oscar is the first to let out an awkward cough.
“We were just talking about…logistics!” He turns to you, sparing you a pleading look. “W-weren’t we?”
You finally come to, nodding slowly, eyes buzzing between the two McLaren drivers and your best friend, who wobbles from left to right. “Yeah, I….we—logistics, and whatnot.” A beat. “Doesn’t matter.”
He flinches, avoiding your doleful stare. Oscar forces such a bright smile—the kind that can’t go unnoticed by even the biggest idiot on earth—and nods in agreement. “She’s right. It doesn’t matter.”
Lando analyzes you, then his teammate, and wishes he had done more to keep Anastasia from barging in. But really, was this some sign? Maybe you were some delusional little girl who truly believed she had a chance with the boy next door. The one everyone wants, but only one will get to have.
And let’s face it.
It was never going to be you.
-
You’d make an excellent detective in your next life, you’re sure of it. But for now, you’re just some brokenhearted assistant who mourns the death of her what-ifs. Someone who is really good at picking up on clues.
It’s right before Christmas—right before Anastasia’s birthday party—and you’re curling your hair quite poorly. You daze off every now and then, you apply mascara almost zombie-like, and you’re dreading even showing up. Have you been avoiding him? Yes. Yes, you have. Have you been good at it? Only the best, if we’re being truthful here. And were you ready to face him without feeling the need to bolt?
Nope. Not in this lifetime nor the next.
But still, you force yourself to finish getting ready because this isn’t about you. This isn’t about him. It’s about being there for your friend.
Mindlessly, on the drive there, pouting in the back of the yellow cab, you click onto Instagram and the first thing you do is smile at the birthday post Anastasia had posted not even five minutes ago. You scroll, smile wider, and then come to a harsh pause. The kind that makes your throat close up. The kind that makes you stop breathing.
The kind that lets you know—
You’ve lost.
His arms are tied around her waist, his head nuzzles between her neck, but you can still tell it’s him. His hazel hair can’t go unnoticed. Maybe to someone else, but not you.
Then, as if all odds are against you, your feed refreshes and you’re left far more dumbfounded.
She appears in most of his pictures because why not? It’s his girlfriend's birthday, it goes as expected. Museum dates. Pictures of them with each other's families. And you feel greedy like never before because—why couldn't that be you?
Venmo or cash? You look up, making eye contact with your taxi driver who looks just as tired as you. You press your lips together into a fine line. Digging into your purse, you grab all that you have and jump out of the cab.
It’s chilly out and the lights are beautifully hung, but it doesn’t do you any good. You just want to go home. Curl up in bed and die. Dig a hole—self-suffocate—who cares. And you’re ready to turn around, go back and apologize to Mr. Lennon for not doing better. You really thought you had it in you, but it just wasn’t enough.
Only then, the door swings open and Pierre curls a brow. Kika waves from behind “He thought you were some serial killer. He’s been watching too much Dateline.” The brunette scurries over, throwing her arms around you and takes a step back. “Come in before you freeze to death.”
But even that didn’t sound too bad. You sheepishly thank her, following the couple back in. A string of jazz cradles the warm lit living room and the scent of apple pie makes you inhale sharply. A giggle stirs up behind you. Anastasia grins.
“You’re here!”
All of a sudden, you hate her smile. You hate her laugh. You hate her entirely. But you also don’t. You can’t hate her smile. You can’t hate her laugh. You can’t hate her entirely. Because even though you feel like she owes you loyalty, that’s not really true. She had zero idea about your feelings towards Oscar and she won. Fair and square. That doesn’t mean you had to like it.
“Happy birthday, Annie.” Hugging her, you giggle against her ear when she jumps up and down, nearly knocking you two over. “For you. From me.”
She wiggles her neat brows, green eyes buzzing with suspicion. “Is it a vibrator again?”
You blush. “No. Even better.”
“Wow! Even better?” She rips the small bag open, eyes widened double in their size. “Oh my God, you got me the Mary Jane’s I wanted?”
“Well, you kept bugging me, and so I thought—”
“D'accord, je comprends. I love them, thank you.” Grabbing your wrist, she tugged you into the empty hallway, and you can already feel her buzzing with excitement. Your stomach churns. “I wanted to tell you as soon as he asked me out—I really did—but he insisted on keeping it between us two for a while, and I told him no, I had to tell you, but then I understood that maybe it was for the best, and I’ve always liked him—”
Every word makes you feel smaller and smaller because the light in her eyes gives it all away. She, too—much like you—is in love with Oscar Piastri. You shake your head, sharing a light laugh. “I totally get it. There’s no need to explain.”
The green eyed girl visibly relaxes, shoulders rolling back. “I knew you’d understand. Oscar was right—you have a good heart.”
Ana, Yuki just spilled wine on your coach, Daniel rattles from the other side of the room, pointing accusingly towards his teammate who rubs the cushion with his Dior sweatshirt. She sighs. Be right back!
At that moment, you don’t care if you wind up with a deadly case of hypothermia, you simply walk out of the warm house.
“What are you doing? You’re going to get sick.”
Screwing your eyes shut seems to be the only answer to help your mending heart into not breaking completely. And fuck him—fuck him for sounding so goddamn caring.
You turn with a soft smile, shrugging nonchalantly. “Won’t really make a difference, I already feel sick.” You cough for emphasis. “See?” Oscar rolls his eyes, ignoring the poor excuse, and hands you his puffer jacket. You shake your head. Take it. “No.” He frowns. Why not? Rocks crunch with every step he takes. “It wouldn’t be right.”
“What? Borrowing a jacket from a friend?”
“Borrowing my best friend's boyfriend’s jacket.”
His stomach drops, rolling with a wave of anxiety as he tries to not show his uncomfort. “She told you?”
Your teeth grind harder. “That, and you both posted about a thousand pictures together. Wasn’t that difficult to understand what was going on.” A sore laugh. “I’m happy for you two, though. Really. I am.”
“You are?”
Sending a nasty glare that you tried to keep in for the life in you, you turn over to face him, nose rosy. “Yes. Over the fucking moon.”
He flinches. “Listen, about that day at Lando’s house. I-I-I was caught up in the moment. I shouldn’t have said what I said, o-or tried to kiss you—”
“You’re a phony, you know that, right?”
Another flinch. “I’m trying to apologize to you. I’m sorry. I feel bad, okay?”
Tears well up inside your eyes. Somewhere deep inside your chest, you feel a harsh sting, and still that doesn’t compare to his pity. You let out a scoff, crossing your arms. “You feel bad, for what? For messing with my emotions, or for getting with my best friend?” You poke his chest hard, but he remains as still as a brick wall, a pained expression mapped out. “Which one is it?”
“For all of it!” He grabs your face, making you freeze under his fire-like touch. “I loved you—God—I loved every inch of you. Your humor, your heart, your jokes that never land, the awkward giggles that follow afterward—everything. There was not a single thing you could do that could have pushed me away.”
“Then what happened?” you whisper, eyes tracing his pink lips, trying to enjoy his hands. They’re calloused, sure, but they’re by far the closest thing you’ve had, so nothing else matters. His breath hitches, soft eyes looking down at you in complete defeat. You grimace. “Why was I not enough for you to try?”
His hands drop. Brown locks shakes as he rubs his eyes, like this is all some part of a fever dream. Maybe it was. The Australian frowns. “I could ask you the same thing.”
It’s a slap in the face, and it burns like never before because you know he’s right. “I wanted to tell you!” A shaky breath. “I was going to tell you.”
Leaves rustle. “You were?”
“Yes,” you confess, nodding adamantly. “That day at Lando’s place—I wanted to tell you.”
The McLaren driver bites his tongue hard, blinking rapidly. “W-what would you have said?”
“That I loved you too.”
He can’t hide his pain just by hearing those words. He scrunches his nose. He nods robotically. And he keeps his eyes trained towards the ground, like he’s in the middle of solving a puzzle.
“I really did like you. From the moment we met.” Finally, he looks up, round eyes searching for any sign of intimacy. If there’s any left—any you still save for him. “Do you remember the day we first met?”
“A little bit. Yeah.”
A second ticks by. “I do. Remember it all, I mean. Think back to it quite often.” He lets out a boyish grin, crinkles forming, making your heart flutter. “You took my breath away.”
And as if humanly possible, despite the icy air, your cheekbones flush harder as you bite back a giddy smile. “You barely even noticed m—”
“You wore a white ribbon. Hair half up, half down. Denim overalls with your initials sewn onto them. Emerald earrings.” You blink, clearly taken aback by his polished memory. His eyes soften. “I’ll always notice you.”
-
Anastasia pecks the Australians cheek, giggling after each one. Oscar smiles, letting out a shy laugh. From the corner, seated next to Lando, you sigh sadly. The Brit bumps his shoulder up against yours. What’s wrong? But you must not have heard him, or you ignore him, but he, too, has eyes.
“I swear I didn’t know a thing about them,” he whispers. “If I had, I would have warned you, you know that—”
“Lando,” you cut him off, voice weak and mellow. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault.”
He frowns. “I know that, but—”
“It’s not your fault,” you repeat, this time more firm. He swallows, nodding hesitantly. With a soft laugh, you poke his ribs and he’s quick to let out a yelp. “Just want to forget, you know?”
Lando hums. “Understood.”
Anastasia clinks her spoon against her mug. The one you each painted differently in that one pottery class years ago. She grins. “I’m so glad all of you could make it, really, it means a lot.” Her eyes crinkle sweetly towards Oscar who traces shapes down her back. She blushes for him—the same way you do. “I feel like…I finally have everything I ever wanted.”
A string of oohh's echo the room, whistles ringing. She laughs, head falling back, and he lets out a single chuckle, rosy cheeks making everyone grow louder. Meanwhile, you stay silent, focusing on Lando’s shoes. The Brit winces, rubbing your shoulder awkwardly.
Daniel yodels, raising his beer. “Well, in that case, I feel like I do too!” He hiccups, making Pierre and Yuki snicker. “A hot girlfriend, good ‘ol friends, and a nice pair of abs.”
“They are nice,” Lily mumbles, earning her a soft smack from Alex who rolls his eyes.
Carlos cackles. “Me next—um, okay. A good team, my girlfriend, and…and—my hair.”
“Narcissist,” Lando whispers, trying to get a good laugh out of you. And it works. You giggle, muffling the sound with the back of your hand. Oscar perks up, orbs floating over to where you and the Brit whisper to one another, smiles only growing wider. His jaw clenches. Either way, you tune out all the constant chatter after hearing how Pierre was grateful for having a massive cock.
“I really hope nothing changes between us.”
You laugh. “I think it might be a bit too late for that.”
The Australian scratches his shoes against the wet pavement. He agrees. He won’t admit it, but he agrees. Everything has changed. Timidly, he glances over at you, biting the inside of his cheek. His gaze burns—just like always—and you turn to face him.
By now your tears have dried, but your heartbreak still continues. Something deep inside tells you that it will for as long as you live. You despise yourself for letting any of this get out of hand. For letting your fear of rejection play a big part in losing him. He smiles.
“I love you, okay?”
You smile. “I love you, too.”
Your voice sounds sweet—just like honey. And if it’s a lie, just to make him feel better, then he’s a grateful bloke. He might not have your heart—not completely—and he might not have your hand in his, but he’s fine with that. Because he’s heard all he’s needed to hear. And he can live at peace.
Oscar grins, leaning down to kiss your cheek. It’s tender, just the way you pictured it. You smell like flowers, just like he had dreamt. He pulls away. “You can always talk to me. Whenever. I’ll always be there for you.”
“Thank you. But I won’t bother you too much.” His brows furrow, mouth opening to protest before you wave him off with a tired smile. “Don’t want to vent to you about…well—you.”
“What about you?” Anastasia squeals, making your jump in place.
“What about me?”
She rolls her eyes, theatrically. Oscar remains as still as a statue, enjoying the moment to admire you without having to explain why—all eyes were on you, after all. “Have you ever gotten everything you ever wanted?”
Wistfully, your eyes look up, connecting with the ones you know so well. You admire his boyish features one last time before looking down onto your lap and then focusing on Anastasia.
“No. But I once got very close.”
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WHAT THEY DO WHEN THEY’RE IN LOVE!
꒰warnings꒱ not proofread, dainsleif/pantalone may be ooc (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥`)
⠀꒲ ` synopsis . . . just cute habits, actions etc that they do, whether intentionally or not, after being struck with cupid’s arrow.
⠀꒲ ` characters . . . jean, diluc, zhongli, xiao, nilou, xianyun, dehya, wanderer, arlecchino, pantalone, dainsleif
⠀꒲ ` notes . . . scrolling through the genshin tag makes me wanna die sometimes…i’m trying to do investigative work and i have to quickly scroll past the same smutty language like it’s booktok torture + also i’ve been playing baldurs gate 3 for the past several days and i think i’ve developed a problem…
G. JEAN — 琴
ʚ jean is very subtle in the way she loves someone, she doesn’t want to keep it secret per se, but her love is always almost adjacent to a puppy crush; something that seems fleeting but in the long run returns harder and hits oh so much worse.
ʚ she can’t necessarily abuse her powers, and she wouldn’t dare dream of messing up the order she so carefully has managed to maintain, so the way she tries to convey her feelings across isn’t too brash or loud.
ʚ simple things like letting her hands brush against yours when she passes you documents, allowing you to visit her office whenever you please even if it’s to just sprawl down at a nearby couch and read a book you found in the library while meandering, and even letting you join her on her daily walks across the courtyard.
ʚ during windblume festivals she won’t hesitate to strike up a seemingly harmless and friendly conversation, all the while sneaking a flower into your hair that resembles the feelings you stir up inside her fuzzy heart.
ʚ jean is overall quite an awkward person when it comes to anything related to romantic or plantoic ties, she’s a bit of a people pleaser in that way where she prefers to assume everyone’s a friend before an enemy… or in this case, “interested”.
ʚ with backup and sought guidance from her good friends lisa and kaeya, she’ll try a myriad of tactics to get you to notice her; a little shoulder massage there, a heartfelt sticky note placed on your workstation there, inviting you to classic candlelit dinners etc.
ʚ yes, believe me, she even tried the cartoonish “rose bit between teeth and uncomfortably arched side lean on a wall” approach before deciding it’s much better to listen to herself than the flamboyant duo.
R. DILUC — 迪卢克
ʚ diluc is the actual epitome of a gentleman. his love is so pure and genuine you can’t help but flower press every petal from the various bouquet he personally delivers to you on special occasions (anything from you completing a particularly hard or draining mission to doing something you thought you’d suck at).
ʚ his coat is also yours now. it’s like a six sense at this point to notice when you’re shivering out in the cold winds, and it’s become even more of a routine for him to simply shed that fluffy coat of his and drape it appropriately over your shoulders, trying to maintain a comfortable distance between you two as he adjusts it both to ease your tension and assure the pounding of his heart goes unheard.
ʚ diluc doesn’t enjoy using his riches to woo someone, it’s uncouth and just shows a desperation unbecoming of someone who dates to marry. if he wants to know you’re in it for the long haul, he’ll be much more sensitive and thoughtful when picking out gifts for you, each them have to hold some level of significance in your life.
ʚ the whole fiasco with his poor maids and some sneaky, perverse stalkers and diluc’s flaming great sword certainly applies to you as well; he’ll quietly ensure your safety in the night, helping you walk home with his arm hooked under yours, and in broad daylight he won’t hesitate to swing that polished wolf’s gravestone of his against any onlookers.
ʚ diluc is extremely closed off but deeply sentimental, he can so easily find himself rambling about his childhood stories to you; anything from how he used to collect seashells with kaeya to bring back to their dad, or how him and jean used to let baby barbara braid their hair together while babysitting…to things that are slightly more troublesome and heart wrenching to even mutter.
ʚ he may be less vocal than most in terms of feelings, but that doesn’t mean he won’t commit to it if he’s in love with someone. diluc isn’t the slightest bit dumb, he understand in order to get his feelings across he needs to do more than take random days off to spend time with you, he needs to at least hint it in a way that clearly gets his intentions across.
ʚ believe me, whenever you come by to dawn winery per notice, everyone raises a brow at you with curious smirks and gazes as diluc nearly stumbles on his words to get the phrase: “you look lovely tonight” out.
ZHONGLI — 钟离
ʚ he has up to thousands years of romantic customs under his belt, he understands the vague signs and ways to further communicate how much he adores you.
ʚ … that would be the case in its full if not for the fact for the first thousand couple years of his life he wasn’t busy maiming other gods and shedding blood. safe to say, his memories of mortal “courting” is slightly, if not absolutely, a massive, weaving and overlapping trail of various centuries and cultures he’s been accustomed to; anything ranging from the days when khaenri’ah was still in its prime to nowadays with newfound slang.
ʚ he’ll recite the most beautifully heartfelt and awfully sincere poem all the while you’re fighting your life in a haunted house (he’s heard this activity is helpful to get couples closer to one another, and given the fact you’re clinging on for dear life at the edge of his coat, he assumes he’s on the right track!)
ʚ he wants to impress you while also maintaining an air of genuineness to his actions, and while that does sometimes end in awkward situations where he ends up wearing regal attire to what’s supposed to be a casual dinner at wangmin, his heart remains completely pure in its endeavours.
ʚ oh, let’s not forget this man is quite literally a dragon too!
ʚ sometimes he can forget you don’t have the same complexion as him and will proudly present you some sort of glimmering relic from his hoard, forgetting that certain materials that existed back in the day were deadly and or toxic for mortals to touch let alone possess.
ʚ with a little nudge in the right direction, he’ll quickly learn everything there is to know for how to properly handle your precious heart. whatever you’d like, you may have — if it’s within his reach, that is. but it doesn’t mean he’ll stop at what’s available, no, just how much he’s willing to risk for you.
XIAO — 魈
ʚ he’s already embarrassed and awkward enough with accepting the fact he likes you, so accepting the fact that he loves you had left him with a lengthy exorcism spree down in some forgotten areas in liyue (it didn’t help).
ʚ in all honestly, not much changes; both because he’s rather emotionally constipated but also because he’s more than sure he’s loved you for longer than he seems to currently acknowledge.
ʚ letters that came only on special occasions like your birthday or his became much more frequent and a lot less poetic, it felt more like he was writing about his thoughts at the time, a little akin to how you’ve made him feel less constricted and much more free; he can finally have the courage to step out of his comfort zone.
ʚ all those small acts of love he used to subtly express (i.e gifting you two crystaflies, personally inviting you to come hang out, etc) he manages to double, he can’t have you thinking his intentions are the same as before. no, they’re much stronger now.
ʚ his guard softens around you regardless, but when you randomly fall asleep on his shoulder on your weekly visits at wangshu inn, instead of taking you to one of the rooms, he’ll sit there and allow you to rest, and if he’s assured you’re not awake to ridicule him, maybe, just maybe…he’ll sneakily loop his arm around your waist.
ʚ even just the thought of you makes him spiral into daydreaming, sitting atop a tree and swinging his leg back and forth carelessly as he stares up at the night to await for a new light, knowing full well the only sun he wants to see is you…just imagining his hands holding your waist like they did so long ago makes him shiver (hopefully this time he’ll get to do it when you’re not falling, and instead are falling for him)
NILOU — 妮露
ʚ nilou is basically a disney princess, if you see her singing to random birds that come watch her performances, everyone in the grand bazaar already knows it’s because you’ll be in the crowd that night.
ʚ each step within her routines are done with the little more passion, if that even is possible given her character, all because she imagines that pride and hopeful heart eyes in your eyes as all the attention is on her.
ʚ sometimes this fixation can lead to dumb mistakes on stage which bring her to sulking away with a hand on her forehead dabbing away at the sweat, but even the mention of your name as you pass by several sumeru streets is enough for her to brighten, do a quick wardrobe switch and run off to tackle you within her embrace.
ʚ nilou is not loud, but definitely not subtle. the exact representation of how she feels when you come to encourage her at her lowest (though those days are few). you’re there for her in ways you don’t imagine, and that alone is enough for her to daze away into the night as she cuddles her pillow, legs wrapped around it and all, and begins thinking about the what ifs of your relationship.
ʚ sometimes it’s a little comedic the way she speaks about you, it almost sounds like she’s reminiscing about a fictional book character with how much she takes pride in whatever little thing you do. no one tires of seeing her footsteps lightly tap against the ground in circles as she gushes about how when you complimented her the other day, you touched her cheek seemingly subconsciously ∩^ω^∩
XIANYUN — 闲云
ʚ she’s a little embarrassed at just how obvious she can be sometimes, it doesn’t help the fact her own children keep using this love of hers to their advantage.
ʚ she keeps nagging them about not taking care of themselves (she’s all too keen about their health and whereabouts now that she dwells alongside liyuean people) and yet just the mention of your name has her slightly stuttering in a ditzy trance as she hooks her glasses back up her nose bridge.
ʚ without hesitance, she’ll show you a photo album she has of all those close to her; would you like to see the drawing little ganyu made when she just barely had her horns? or perhaps the polearm young shenhe broke when she miscalculated her own strength in training?
ʚ her family is her pride and joy, it’s only natural for her to want you to be part of it even if it’s something as silly as raking through photos of a chubby ganyu eating the stem of a flower or teeny shenhe napping on a tree.
ʚ a peaceful life mingling with mortals has left her with ample time to enjoy the trivialities of life, and yet she finds her mind all too quickly wandering to you; had you been taking care of yourself? were you feeling lonely? did you need her to make something for you?
ʚ a secretive worry wart that quickly becomes that ancient adetpus she used to pride herself as soon as your delicate hands accidentally brush against hers; suddenly she’s perked up, chest heaven up high with a confident hand on her shoulder: you wouldn’t even think that flurry of pink hues gushing across her cheeks was real if not for the light providing evidence.
DEHYA — 迪希雅
ʚ oh she’s absolutely ecstatic!!
ʚ there’s genuinely nothing better than love in her eyes, especially just having the ability to love and trust someone fully when you haven’t been able to do so for a plethora of years.
ʚ doesn’t try to hide it, like at all, if anything she makes it rather obvious with the way she constantly pulls you closer as if you were already an item, arms constantly clinging onto you and your sides or her hands messing up your hair as you greet her.
ʚ she’ll take you anywhere you ask, free of charge of course (just promise to smile…and maybe if you’re up for it give her a kiss on the cheek, that’s sure to be enough reimbursement).
ʚ she’s already quite a confident and outwardly friendly person (if the price is right that is) but when in your presence? what’s wrong with just a little bit of showing off…
ʚ dehya needs you to see the best side of her!! maybe then you’ll finally give in and realise that her constantly asking for you to come join her on her travels and commissions isn’t brought out of mere timed coincidence
WANDERER — 流浪者
ʚ i saw that a few people were upset and confused by wanderer’s sudden switch up into being more kind/friendly, but i think we all forget what kind of person he was before his betrayals.
ʚ he loves wholeheartedly, if he adores something it consumes him in a warm pit of mushy domesticity — he doesn’t hate love or being kind, he hates the way it makes him vulnerable and the way it reminds him of the way he used to be.
ʚ that also means he’ll completely ignore you, or, try his best to rather.
ʚ wanderer knows within his heart that he completely years for you, just the accidental slip of his gaze meeting yours makes his brain go haywire, sending volts of electricity down his spine — you make him feel so alive.
ʚ it’s terrifying to return to a person you once were especially now with the knowledge of how being the way you were lead to some sort of tragedy, he’s managed to build up these walls so high and here you were, sneaking in through cracks he didn’t even know he had.
ʚ and he both loves it and hates it; loves the fact he can still feel, but hates how he’s so easily susceptible.
ʚ loving you turns into self-loathing and brooding, his feet pacing up and down every street at night to clear his muddled head. small distractions like taking strolls in meadows or sleeping up in the vines of trees lead to just thoughts of you and you alone.
ʚ wanderer refuses to be overly friendly and buddy-buddy with you even if he’s aware that if you decided to just one day hold him sincerely he’d burst into tears, but he can compromise with being less cutthroat.
ʚ “shut the fuck up” turns into him just rolling his eyes at you as you ramble (he soaks up any piece of information he can and locks it away), items you gift him now are more apparent in their value as he yells at those who dare question the dumb aranara pin you bought him and placed sneakily on his hat…oh and he gives you hat privileges.
�� it’s raining? …get close to him so you don’t begin complaining about the way the rain feels on your skin.
ARLECCHINO — 阿蕾奇诺
ʚ she starts treating you less like an asset in her “contact if in need of assistance” roster and more like a friend — of course, she maintains that distance between you two, but she lets you wriggle around in her heart to see if you manage to fit.
ʚ chances are, you will — unknowingly she’d grown to love you in ways that may have even gone unnoticed by her given how natural they were; inviting you to random gatherings when the whim arises, pulling your chair out for you when out for brunch, or even tucking away strands of hair and twirling it around playfully.
ʚ arlecchino’s love isn’t something immediate or expected, she’s a woman who keeps every card close to her chest and her children even closer, you have to prove to her that you’re worth it, in a way that doesn’t necessarily mean spilling blood but more so answers the question: do you care, and are you willing to accept her blinding love?
ʚ it’s like a shepherd dog with a lost lamb, but that little sheep is just you, and she’s a wolf in need of a muse.
ʚ cute tea parties aren’t uncommon with the two of you, she’ll happily let you indulge yourself in treats as she leans back with scorching tea in her hands while memorising every curve of your lips as you chew and swallow, she loves watching the way your eyes crinkle when you smile and the little sway from side to side you occasionally do as an expression of joy.
ʚ once arlecchino notices that she’s began treating you as another authority figure in the house of hearth, she’ll reach and collar you gently, intertwining her dark, cursed hand into your flowery one.
PANTALONE — 潘塔罗涅
ʚ one of the most attractive qualities a man can have is knowing when to shut the fuck up and to slide his card over during a dinner — both such things pantalone can do effortlessly, especially when it comes to you.
ʚ arlecchino claims that: “he allows his actions to be governed by the vengeance and hatred locked in the depths of his heart.” something that definitely translates into his love affairs in more than obsessive manners.
ʚ don’t be afraid of the massive hauls of clothing and sparkling jewellery galore that are being trudged in by multiple men, darling, it’s just a menial souvenir from his latest travels and newfound connections that he thought you might enjoy ^^
ʚ while his grandeur usually stems from his deep hearted desire to overthrow the imbalance between immortals and mortals, rest assured the luxury he provides you purely stems from his desire to make you his.
ʚ whether that entails you being his pet for him to seek comfort from on the occasion or a genuine connection where he can comfortably hold you at night purely depends on you.
ʚ oh, you’ll let him chew your ear off about his recent expedition and extravagant plan? consider your rent payed for the next few months and a few kisses on your cheek that certainly aren’t actually part of the snezhnayan custom (let him indulge in those little cravings or else he’ll undoubtedly be petty).
DAINSLEIF — 戴因斯雷布
ʚ has a breakdown.
ʚ a little dramatic, but honestly if his entire life wasn’t a disgusting mess already, you’ve come to make it worse. fate is deliberately mean to brooding blondes it seems, given the fact he’s now stuck pacing around back and forth on a trail of dead abyss mages as he rereads a letter you’ve sent him weeks ago.
ʚ everything you give to him, everything you say, do, write, whatever, he remembers implicitly. each word you say is engraved into him as if they were important artefacts regardless of how pointless and mundane.
ʚ it can honestly get a little…scary at times? you’ll mention liking something once and all of a sudden you find it within your possession at least a few weeks later.
ʚ dainsleif doesn’t have enough time to wallow in the glory of mushy, all consuming love despite desperately wanting to imagine how your hand would feel caressing down past each of his scars, but what he can do is protect you, and to him that’s a greater blessing than intimacy he knows will end eventually.
ʚ a big tough man who would honestly fold the moment you call him any variation of a pet name, specifically with the word “mine/my” at the beginning — hey, it’s nice knowing you mean something to someone the point they view you as inseparable.
ʚ the timings at which he comes to aid you are all too convenient and believe me he’ll try his best to downplay it as coincidence, all the while he’s breathing heavily both from the face your eyes are scanning his so closely and the fact he used up so much energy to merely make a portal to sneak into your space.
©STARYUEE do not copy, steal or repost ♡ ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ɪʜᴇᴀʀᴛɢᴀɴʏᴜ
#genshin x reader#soon as i finish bg3 i’ll be reborn anew. IM STUCK ON ACT 2 BC OF THAT DUMB MYKRUL#genshin x gnreader#genshin x you#genshin x gn!reader#jean x reader#diluc x reader#zhongli x reader#xiao x reader#nilou x reader#xianyun x reader#dehya x reader#wanderer x reader#scaramouche x reader#scara x reader#arlecchino x reader#dainsleif x reader#pantalone x reader
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Lights, Camera…Chaos.
[PLAY HERE] (October 23rd, 2024) Act 1, Chapter 1, 64.2k words.
For as long as you can remember, your dream has stayed the same—you want nothing more than to make it as an actor in Hollywood. After years as an overlooked, overworked talent, your big break comes from an unlikely source. And it’s one that changes everything, for better or worse.
Hollywood is its own character within this world—sometimes it loves you, sometimes it wants nothing more than to see you crash and burn. Navigating this ever changing landscape while balancing your own interpersonal relationships is only half the challenge. The other half is memorizing your lines.
Navigate the red carpet, bloodthirsty paparazzi, cut-throat tabloids and complicated relationship dynamics with A-list celebrities (who may or may not be completely insane.)
But, hey: isn’t this what you’ve always wanted?
Key Features:
- Customize your Actor: are you a classic Hollywood heartthrob? An eccentric and unconventional recluse? Are you kind and genuine despite the fame, or a cutthroat diva with undeniable talent?
- Navigate scandal, paparazzi, and stan culture: dodge or embrace the flashing lights. Interact with your fans, or distance yourself from them for your sanity. Wait—who are they shipping your character with?
-Build your legacy: choose between the stability of superhero blockbusters or turn into an indie darling. Or, maybe forgoe both to become a household name in the horror genre.
- Network and build relationships: whether they’re manufactured by your well-meaning publicist or spawned from real feelings, forge dynamic and ever changing relationships with other industry icons.
- Try to manage your mental health: the dark side of the industry lurks in every corner—the highs are high, but the lows are ever lower.
Characters:
Kendall Mays (gender selectable)—ever the loyal best friend, Kendall followed you into the throes of showbiz without hesitation. From fighting over toys on the playground to helping you run lines for a major motion picture, you can always count on them to have your back. That is, before they met Mason—their ever-present boyfriend who demands more and more of their time. You were never that great at sharing.
[Note: Kendall is not a romance option.]
Sutton Foster (he/him, she/her)—child star turned award winning powerhouse. Sutton Foster has everything an actor could want—well, minus the countless stays at rehab centers around the world. It’s undeniable that Sutton is a generational talent, but what’s even more notable is their messy personal life. You yourself have been caught in Sutton’s gravitational pull, once upon a time. The question lies in whether or not you’ll pull yourself away.
Wyn Grace (he/him, she/her)—on stage, Wyn is electric. The same cannot be said for Wyn off-stage. The lead singer of the up-and-coming Indie band is struggling with their meteoric rise to fame. As the awards pile up and the crowds get bigger, Wyn is unraveling at the seams. All they wanted to do was make music with their friends, but the fame makes them reconsider it all.
Lex Moreau (he/him)—an older, award-winning director with an…eccentric disposition. Yet despite his volatile nature and obsession with perfection, anyone who’s anyone would kill to work with him. Lex is always in search for a muse, a great beacon to pour all of his artistic vision into. And now, he thinks he’s found that in you. Lucky you?
[C is a conditional character, only appears based on choices you make.]
Carlo/Carmen Mencina (gender selectable)—C is harder to pin down than a stable acting gig in LA. When you’re together—it’s kismet. The problem lies in when you’re apart. C’s frequent disappearances abroad leave a bad taste in your mouth, and when a shocking truth comes to light, it’s not just your relationship in the spotlight—it’s your life, too.
Flings and other mini-romances will be available as well. But these I will let be revealed as the story progresses.
When writing this game, I knew what themes I wanted to focus on, and the care/detail needed to do so. Hence, this game is strictly 18+.
TW: death, substance abuse, suicide, bullying, explicit language, violence, and explicit (skippable) sexual content.
Thank you for reading my intro! Reblogs are welcome, and my ask box is open (:
And major thank you @thecutestgrotto for the gorgeous headers!
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Pluto in the Juno Persona Chart
‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
࿐࿔Juno (3). This post only applies to the JPC.
Represents changes that they will bring into your life. However, it can also tell you which area of your relationship will be an issue or an obstacle you must face to be together.
Masterlist | Everything in this post only applies to the Juno Persona Chart
In the signs
ஓ Aries 1°, 13°, 25°:
They will change the way you look at yourself and those around you. Perhaps they will bring a lot of change into how you handle your passion or help you gain back your momentum if you feel like you've lost it before meeting them. There may be some arguments between you two, or perhaps stubbornness will prove to be an issue at first. Perhaps there is a need to be independent i.e job, distance, personal lives.
ஓ Taurus 2°, 14°, 26°:
They will bring stability, abundance and romance into your life. However clinginess, jealousy, greed or something about physical contact may be an issue. You could want to be next to each other often but can't for example. The way you dress could also be a point of disagreement. Money could also be an issue.
ஓ Gemini 3°, 15°, 27°:
They will change the way you think & communicate. There may be issues with different languages, different locations, things may be rushed. Their studies or travels could be a problem you'd have to face in your relationship. Their siblings could also be part of the issue. One of you may be busy studying to be able to communicate for example.
ஓ Cancer 4°, 16°, 28°:
They will change how you feel. Perhaps they will add to your emotional world. Something about your homelife or your feelings will be an issue at first. Perhaps you are both extremely sensitive to each other, one or both could be easily hurt, or you may want to be around each other often but aren't able to.
ஓ Leo 5°, 17°, 29°:
They will add joy, love and devotion into your life. You will feel more attractive, loved and carefree around them & your creativity will soar. You could be more popular with them, or you feel more seen by their side. Children, arts or personal life may be an issue in your relationship. Children, education, work or arts can be an issue in your relationship. Perhaps these aspects of your life will keep you from spending time or having fun together.
ஓ Virgo 6°, 18°:
Your work and daily routine will change heavily because of them. Whether they introduce you to new work opportunities, new ways to grow or by settling down and having a family together. Your work or commitments may disrupt your relationship at first. Perhaps you will have clashing schedules.
ஓ Libra 7°, 19°:
They will make your life more beautiful as in they'll show you a lot of affection. You might also experience a glow up with them or you might put more focus into aesthetics (have the luxury to indulge in aesthetic things). Your prior relationships, family, work contracts or business relationships may be an issue within your relationship at first.
ஓ Scorpio 8°, 20°:
Bad rumours, divorce, infidelity, toxicity, manipulation, sex and fighting might be quite prominent in your relationship. You will experience a relationship that is unlike any other. It's either extremely toxic or the love of your life with them.
ex: Cardi B has her pluto Scorpio (23° aqua) opposite her venus (21° sag) in the 11th house. Her relationship with her husband has always been seen as promiscuous (she literally posted herself getting backshots on ig TT) & toxic (infidelity).
Ariana Grande also has Pluto in Scorpio (22° cap). Her lovers seem to always be abruptly taken away from her/ she splits with them quickly. Her divorce with her ex-husband was also quite messy . She also seems to still have a deep love for Mac Miller TT. Her relationships have a lasting effect on her career.
Mia Khalife has pluto retrograde in Scorpio (23° aquarius), she's gone through many divorces with many men in the span of a few years. There's literally a diss track on her in regards to her love life TT.
ஓ Sagittarius 9°, 21°:
Studies could be an issue as well as language , culture & long-distance travels. Perhaps you have different beliefs or backgrounds. Religious beliefs could be an issue here. Perhaps both of you have different religions for example. They may still be studying or someone may be busy with school or university (higher studies).
ஓ Capricorn 10°, 22°:
Your career or job could be an issue in your relationship. Perhaps your relationship will be quite public or strained because of work. Your relationship may also feel like a job or a burden depending on other aspects.
ஓ Aquarius 11°, 23°:
Communication, the internet & individually will pose as issues in your relationship. You could find yourself talking on the phone more often for example. Your friends or their friends could be very involved in your relationship. Perhaps you will share the same friend circle. People may dislike seeing the both of you together because of their own rigid beliefs. You both may stand out together & will receive public backlash for being 'odd'.
ஓ Pisces 12°, 24°:
They will add a lot of mysticism, soft romance, and Miscommunication, misinterpretation, and illusion may cloud your relationship. Perhaps both of you will be separated by distance or beliefs/religion. Loneliness or lack of confrontation may also be an issue here. Perhaps both have trouble seeing the severity or reality of their situation.
‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
In the Houses
🫧 1st House:
You'll both be quite competitive with each other. Perhaps your individual lives are quite occupied with other things that need to be done. You both will be thinking of yourselves (your career /goals) too much and not enough attention is given to the relationship because of that.
🫧 2nd House:
Money, debts, communication, writing or career/priorities could be an issue in your relationship. Perhaps both of you may struggle financially at first. I've seen couples with this placement who are both immigrants who had to work hard together to provide for themselves in a foreign country. You could also have disagreements in regards to your finances.
🫧 3rd House:
Communication could be an issue. Perhaps they speak a foreign language, so their intentions or demeanor may be new to you which can cause miscommunication. Texting, or speaking mannerisms may not translate well between languages.
For example: English speaking Japanese individuals tend to type in a very formal & direct way. Although grammatically polite & correct, there is just a cold vibe to it since it's how one would usually write to their boss or employer lol. I'm sure that translates to other languages as well.
🫧 4th House:
Distance could be an issue especially if aspected to the 9th or 12th house. You could want to feel close to your partner, but they may live quite far from you to be able to see them as often as you'd like. You may want to move in together but they may have issues with other things in their lives which stops that from happening.
🫧 5th House:
You could have different views on what fun is for the both of you, and that may cause some frustration in your relationship at first. Fame or popularity may also be an issue. Your relationship could also be very public or treated as entertainment.
🫧 6th House:
Work, career, routine & health issues could be a cause of concern in your relationship. One or both of you may have drastically different time schedules and may find it difficult to make room for eachother in your lives. Your workplace could also discourage your relationship or a relationship in general.
Ex: Lisa has her pluto (4° cancer) in the 6th house Sagittarius. She works in a country foreign from his own and isn't able to see him that often because of her job. Also, her pluto opposites her sun & venus in the 12th house. Lisa and Frederick both keep their relationship private i.e they don't flaunt it publicly. Nobody really knows that much about their relationship outside of posts from paparazzi.
🫧 7th House:
Your relationship itself will face a lot of trials and errors. You'll both have to work hard to maintain balance in your relationship. Business, past relationship drama, parents or close relationships, or even your union itself can be an issue in your relationship.
🫧 8th House:
Jealousy, possessiveness, scandals and control may be an issue in your relationship. Perhaps both of you stick to each other like glue, and have trouble being apart. People could also be very judgemental about your relationship. Money or inheritance could also be an issue here. There may be some toxicity or manipulation at play.
🫧 9th House:
Long-distance, education, or religion could be an issue in your relationship. Perhaps you both have different beliefs or backgrounds as well and that can cause some issues. Being in a relationship with them may need you to travel often or be at a distance from each other.
🫧 10th House:
They will transform your public image & career. Being with them will help you reach greater heights for example. Your career, ambitions, parents or responsibilities will be the main issue in your relationship. You could have a very public relationship, or perhaps people will judge your relationship very harshly. Your father or their father could also dislike your partner for example. Perhaps you aren't able to see each other often because of work.
🫧 11th House:
Your friends, community or society may be an issue in your relationship. You could come from different backgrounds or have a relationship that clashes with the social norms. You could live in a conservative place for example, and both of you may be liberals. The internet and online communication could also prove to be an issue at first . Fame or identity & individuality may also be an issue in your relationship. Your relationship will shake the perspective of many people.
🫧 12th House:
Distance, illusion, delusion, romanticisation, miscommunication and fear/anxiety could be an issue between the both of you. Perhaps one or both parties will be paranoid or weary of the other. They could hide things from each other, or maybe feel like their partner is misleading them. You might move closer to them once in a relationship. There could also be a separation phase. Privacy may be an issue as well i.e people invading your privacy. People with this placement usually hide their relationship until they announce that they're married lol.
Ex: Lana Del Rey (pluto in 12th house) , Lisa (pluto aspects 12th house)
Note: aspects to planets in different houses also bring effects of that house into your problems.
Ex: My pluto is Sag in the 3rd house (23° aqua), it trines Moon in Leo (19° libra) in the 11th house. The relationship I'll have with my future spouse will have issues regarding language & culture (I'll also likely meet him online while pursuing my studies),
Our relationship will be the talk of the town, which will be famous or well known online.
I've also noticed a lot of artists/famous individuals have their JPC pluto in the 5th house, aspects to their 10th house & pluto at 5°/aspects to leo.
Ex: Cardi B, Ariana Grande, Camilla Cabello, Ex- US President Obama (pluto 5th house)
Sid Viscous ( pluto in the 10th)
Matty Healy ( aspects jupiter in 10th house), Jungkook (pluto 5°, both trine venus & mars in 10th House)
‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑ . ₊ ⊹ .₊๋‧₊ ˚ ⊹ ࣭ ⭑
***entertainment & educational purposes only, reader discretion is advised***
Thank you for reading ♡
@northopalshore
@northopalshore 2024 all rights reserved.
#juno in scorpio#juno astrology#astrology notes#astrology blog#astrology observations#astro notes#astro observations#astrology content#astrology#astrology community#juno persona chart astrology#juno persona chart observations#northopalshore asks#pluto in the juno persona chart#jpc#jupiter#juno#future spouse astrology#meeting future spouse astrology#love astrology#predicting love in astrology#romance astrology#astrology tumblr#persona charts#juno persona chart
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Do they like late night talks? (for Rowan and Urianger) and How they make up after a big fight? (for Minthe and Ariadne. Asking for a friend.)
Bruh, half of Rowan and Urianger's conversations are late night talks. They both tend to be night owls in the first place. That being said, if they don't remember to actually retire at some point (and if they don't stop each other) then they end up falling asleep in their chairs doing the good ol' fashioned "I'm just resting my eyes" bit.
Ohhhhh Minthe. Minthe needs her space. I think the actual distressing part about fights for Minthe is that she learns something about the other person that doesn't quite match her perspective. She's so detail oriented, how could she be wrong about her partner? (By losing the forest for the trees!) Eventually Minthe will settle down and make an offering, usually in an effort to fix the problem. I think Minthe created a strain of coffee for Ariadne to give her a better caffeine in take because Minthe thought she was too tired.
Thanks for the ask!
#ask meme#rowan argentas#urianger#aether and anatomy#azem minthe#azem ariadne#looooooooook long late night chats are like the building blocks of aether and anatomy#crucial#foundational#essential#and minthe likes to solve problems#whether the person having the problem having the problem wants her help or not#and hmmm i need to have her do that to hades at some point huh
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♡ Long May You Roar - LN 4 ♡
Summary: this is based off this request! P makes sure to see Lando before the final race and wants to give him a lucky sticker. You think about a life with Lando and what a family with him would be like.
Author's Note: I didn't think it would end up so short but i really tried my best 😭
WC: 882
CW: fluff, Lando and P being besties
“Lando! Lando!” you heard coming from a few feet away. You turned to see P running up to Lando with a sheet of stickers in hand.
You were hanging out with Lando’s mom in the Mclaren hospitality and were standing outside and chatting with Lando before he had to get to the car.
“P! What ya doin?” Lando greets her.
The girl is smiley as she starts to converse with Lan. You watch as the two interact, the girl's mom standing behind a pillar nearby and resting a hand on her belly.
You watch as P asks Lando to bend down to her level so she could whisper something, “Do you want a sticker? They’re lucky.” the girl beams.
“Lucky stickers?! Are they real? I thought they were super rare. How’d you get a hold of them?”
“Magic.” she giggled.
“Oh, well then I must have one then, yeah? So that I can beat Maxie today?”
“Well, not that much luck.”
“Ah, well then.” Lando couldn’t help but laugh a bit. No matter how much she loved Lando, P was very loyal to Max.
“Which sticker would you like?” P asked Lando, displaying the sticker sheet in front of him so he could get a decent view of them.
Lan takes a moment to really think about it and scan the remaining sticker on the sheet before making the final decision, “I would like this one, please.” he said, pointing to the design of a redbull can.
“No, you can’t have that one. You can have this one.” P says as she peels a long sticker off the sheet. It was a design of one of the red bull cars, maybe Lando could use it as motivation to beat them and win the constructors. God knew they needed a bit of magic, from a red bull sticker.
“Yeah, sure. I like that one too, I guess.” Lando dramatically sighs.
“Dramatic. Where do you want the sticker?” P asks, looking up at Lando.
“Hmm, why don’t we put it right here over my wrist. That way it’s easy for me to see.”
P puts all her focus in putting the sticker on Lando’s wrist carefully and precisely.
When she was pleased with the placement of the sticker, she took a step back and smiled at her work. Lando looked at the sticker and gave P a high-five, “Way to go tiger. Long may you roar.”
But, of course, he couldn’t leave before P could get her hug from him. She immediately ran into him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Lando was one of Penelope’s favorite people and it showed. She was always excited to see him and hangout with him. She even cheered him on during races from time to time.
While P and Lando hugged, Lando’s mom went in to hug him as well but it seemed as if the little girl wanted to be the last one to get a Lando hug before he set off. She subtly tried pushing his mom away with her foot which was quite cute and funny. P really did enjoy having Lando around. The two had sort of watched each other grow and Lando was always a constant figure in her life.
Watching him with P and other kids sort of settled a debate that you’d had with yourself in your head. When you and Lando had started dating, you talked about potentially having kids in the future. You both wanted to have that conversation early on so that it wouldn’t become a problem later down the line.
You were both pleased when you learned that neither of you had a set decision on whether you wanted kids in the future or not. It was sort of in the middle, you wouldn’t mind having kids, but it wasn’t something you’d always imagined or dreamed of. If it came down to it, you wouldn’t mind having kids or not having them.
It was also a matter of who it was with. You both wanted to have kids with the right person. And now, after all this time, you think if you were to have kids with anyone, it would be Lan. You wouldn’t want to have a family with anyone else.
You knew you wanted all of it with him. Watching dragonflies fly above your heads, having favorite spots on swing sets. There was never any room for regrets in your dreams and now you know that Lando is a part of all your dreams, and that you would never regret anything with him.
The time will arrive for settling down and having a family with him, but for now, the both of you will learn to grow and be curious about life.
Before Lando started his trek to the garage, he went to you to give you a quick hug and kiss. He smiled at you, eyes twinkling in the shining sun. Nowadays, it’s not often you see him this happy.
“You look happy.” you tell him.
“I got a sticker from P. That’s like the biggest approval you can get from a kid, ya know.” he joked, “Alright, I really have to go now. I’ll see you after.”
He kisses you one more time before running off, wilder and lighter than before.
#formula 1#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 writing#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1#f1 fic#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando norris#norris x reader#mclaren#formula 1 imagine#formula one#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fic
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CEO!matt that the only reason he calls reader to his office is to see what outfit she's wearing (he stares SHAMELESSLY at her tits)
for the third time this morning, the buzzer on your intercom rings, displaying the same familiar name; matt.
he’s not left you alone so far today, constantly seeking your assistance with the smallest, most insignificant things. who the fuck needs help deciding whether a document to be printed should be double sided or not? there’s definitely an ulterior motive behind his actions, but you don’t want to make any false judgments. so you answer his call with a pinched face.
“yes, mr sturniolo?”
there’s a strangled noise on the other end of the line and your eyebrows shoot upwards in concern; maybe he’s choking and that’s why he’s called you? you start to roll your chair back, ready to spring into action when matt finally speaks. thank god; you didn’t know the heimlich manoeuvre.
“could you come to the office real quick?” who could’ve guessed. “i have a question to ask you.”
you grit your teeth. “absolutely. i’ll be a minute or so, kinda swamped in work over here sir!”
“alright, that’s fine.” another strangled noise from his end, this one concealed but still audible. “just come up when you’re not busy.”
you thank him, ending the call and jumping back to your laptop to finish writing up an email, eyes creasing as you cringe at your formal language. it doesn’t take too long, thankfully, and soon enough you find yourself outside matt’s office, a folder tucked under your arm as you prepare for whatever unnecessary question is about to be thrown your way.
it’s worse than you imagine.
“how many sugars does an average person have in their coffee?” matt asks you as you open the door with caution; he sits behind his desk, tie loosened around his neck as he carelessly scrolls through his phone.
you can’t believe it; CEO of the fucking company and both incompetent and clearly bored of his own job. so privileged yet so spoiled, and you can’t help but scoff at him. he raises an eyebrow, placing his phone down. “you have a problem?”
“nothing, sir, it’s just…” you exhale through your nose harshly, squeezing your eyes shut in an attempt to stop the word vomit. but it’s too late. “don’t you think you should take your job a bit more seriously?”
matt blinks, stunned into silence as you continue. “i mean, you are the CEO, and i don’t think it’s appropriate to be constantly asking your secretary to come to your office to ask stupid questions about sugars in coffee.”
“it wasn’t stupid. it was genuine.” matt challenges, trying to hide his smirk at the sight of you getting more and more frustrated. he likes the sight of you all worked up.
“use google!” you gesticulate, throwing your head back as you groan. composure, you remind yourself, and you lower your head to lock eyes with matt. “sorry, sir. it’s just i have a lot of work to do. it’s quite inconvenient for you to be always calling me up to your office.”
he hums, tapping his fingers on his lips as he thinks of something to say back. but he’s rendered speechless, leaning back in his chair with a shrug. he doesn’t have the heart to tell you the real reason he called you up here, so with a dismissive hand, matt waves you and your low cut shirt away.
and you go, biting your tongue to stop a rogue asshole rolling off your lips, your hips swaying as you turn towards the door. “i’ll send you today’s analytics through before i go for lunch.” are your last words, and matt slouches down into his chair as he nods, watching with beady eyes as the door shuts behind you.
he smiles to himself, loosening his tie as his hand falls to his pants, palming his bulge. all of that just to see your tits spilling out your white button up? worth it. so very worth it.
taglist. . . ( @mattslolita, @aelinslegend, @chrissturniolossidehoe, @mattbrainrot, @conspiracy-ash, @emely9274, @matts1freak, @h3arts4nat, @sturn777 ) is open!
divider credits. . . @issysh3ll
(pls send some more scenarios for CEO!matt into my inbox!)
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Marvel and Zatanna
I think Marvel and Zatanna would have a wonderful funny haha father/brother-sister/daughter duo. Magic and Magic. Why not?
Zatanna and Marvel: *both talking*
Zatanna: “I’m just missing this one ingredient for a spell! Hyancinth nectar.”
Marvel: “Hyancinth nectar?” *reaches into pocket dimension to see if he has any before coming up short* “I don’t seem to have any. Well, I’m sure you could find some at the upcoming farmers market in Fawcett.” *shrugs*
Zatanna: “Farmer’s market? Is it like a magical farmers market…?”
Marvel: “Yes actually! I could take you with me if you wanted.”
Zatanna: *thinks that being with the Champion of Magic might help her get better deals on stuff* “I’ll take you up on that!”
The Day of the Farmer’s Market…
Zatanna: “Oh! I’ve been looking for Wrackwort Bulbs!” *trades vendor for them*
Marvel: *holding two huge bags with smaller bags full of ingredients in them*
Zatanna: *puts a bag of Wrackwort Bulbs into one of the bigger bags*
Marvel: “I thought you just wanted Hyancinth Nectar?”
Zatanna: “I can’t add a few more things to my cart on the way?”
Marvel: “I’m not saying you can’t but…”
Zatanna: “But nothing.” *does a little levitation spell to float up and pat his head before spinning around still floating* “Emetic Wax! I need some of that too!”
Marvel: *pulls her back down by the back of her shirt before muttering a counterspell to make her stop levitating*
Zatanna: *jogs over to the vendor selling the wax*
Marvel: *follows after her just happy to see her happy*
or
Zatanna: *making Marvel try on a bunch of outfits* “Work it!”
Marvel: *is in fact, albeit awkwardly, working it*
Zatanna: *chuckling* “I don’t even see why you agreed to this.”
Marvel: *shrugs*
Zatanna: *magics another outfit onto him* “Well I gotta thank you. I didn’t get much of this as a kid.”
Marvel: “Why didn’t you get much of it? You didn’t care for it or something?”
Zatanna: “Uhm… Not exactly.” *unsure whether she should tell Marvel* “When I was younger, my dad uh… had an alcohol problem. By the time he sobered up, I was too old for this stuff.” *awkward*
Marvel: *also awkward* “Oh. I’m sorry.”
Zatanna: “It’s fine. It’s not like I hate my dad for it. He was just going through a tough time. I still love him. I honestly don’t know why you’re apologizing. It’s not like it’s your fault.”
Marvel: *stares for a bit* You know, I’m fine doing this with you even if you’re too old right? I uh… never really got to do stuff like this with my parents either. Maybe I did, but I don’t remember. When I was 8, they died.” *awkwardly pauses cause he doesn’t know whether it was a good idea to share that or not* “But, it’s just, since I didn’t get to do it, and you didn’t get to either, I want to. Cause everyone has to play dress up with someone else at least once in their life, right? So, yeah. I’m fine doing kiddie stuff like this.” *extremely awkward as he says this*
Zatanna: *processing all that information* “I uh… I see.” *magics Marvel into another outfit*
Marvel: “A tiger onesie?” *looks down at the outfit*
Zatanna: *while he’s looking away, rubs at her eyes to hide any tears* “Yeah, a tiger onesie. It fits you.”
Marvel: *now confused* “It does?”
Zatanna: “Yeah, you give off the vibes.”
or
A video of a beam almost falling on the audience of one of Zatanna’s shows goes viral.
Marvel: “Wait, so that wasn’t planned?”
Zatanna: “Nope.”
Marvel: “And you just saved them like that…?You’re amazing!”
Zatanna: *preens at the praise* “I know.”
Marvel: “No, Zatanna, I’m being super serious! You’re an awesome hero.” *blinding smile*
I don’t know why but I love it whenever a person a little more than half the size of another person bullies the bigger person. Also, as for the alcoholic thing, it wasn’t really mentioned on the wiki whether or not it affected her badly, but she not only had her dad as her only parent, but he was an alcoholic. It could’ve affected her.
#billy batson#dc captain marvel#shazam#captain marvel dc#fawcett comics#fawcett#fawcett city#zatanna#zatanna zatara
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