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#where is the boiled prawn man
23b0075nke · 2 months
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noblefeathers · 2 months
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Aesop’s gaze wandered to Joseph and stopped at a very specific place. When he noticed where his own gaze was, he instantly turned away, his face entirely red. Even as a man, Aesop had admired Joseph’s body. Now that he was a woman, the effects were still the same on him and he could really slap himself for having stared in the first place.
Joseph had been bringing something for Aesop to eat. Uncomfortable as it was at first, she'd decided to wear a dress that emphasized her chest, with a low enough cut to reveal a hint of cleavage.
As she entered the monarch's room, she set the tray down on a table to the side. "Breakfast, your majesty." She dusted her hands together. "Boiled eggs, slices of melon and cantaloupe, cooked snow peas, and-" She was about to mention the questionable choice of cooked prawns when she noticed Aesop look away.
Was his face red? Joseph thought for a moment.
And then she smiled and stepped over. "Your majesty, is something wrong?" she asked, feigning innocence as she clasped her hands together. "I don't believe you've any reason to look so embarrassed."
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An Overdue Dinner
The door to Jarrod’s room was closed and locked, and behind it the man sat by the hearth as he cooked a humble dinner for his guest. The aroma of boiling prawn and potatoes filled the room. The heat from the fireplace warmed Jarrod’s face as he stirred the wooden spoon in the boiling pot that hung over the fire. Over the past few days, Jarrod had worn a most peaceful expression. One that none in the Hold had seen upon him. He even looked well-rested for the first time in months. His hair hung loose, the small ponytail he usually wore not up.
“I dun’ got much left with crab an’ prawn,” he told Rosalind.  “Most o’ it was given t’ others in th’ Hold ‘fore it went bad. I wasn’ there fer it gettin’ doled out, but I’m hopin’ y’ had yer share at th’ time.” He gave her a sheepish smile as he glanced over to where she sat. It was certainly a story to tell her of the day he first went out crabbing for this dinner. “I’ve been waitin’ t’ do this fer y’ since that letter. An’ I imagined how it’d go o’er an o’er again, but I’m still findin’ m’self at a loss at how t’ begin… so much happened.”
@tinyredrose
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chuckbass-love · 4 years
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May I request a Ransom x Y/n fic where he goes to a pub after being taken out of the will and he see's y/n at a table crying because she's just been dumped
I love this idea!! 
A/N: Just a heads up, i’m keeping the events of the movie in this where he goes back to the house to switch the medication and then have him go to the pub after that.
Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad or Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.
Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Lots of angst, alludes to smut at first and then pure smutty filth. Fingering, oral (m and f receiving), protected sex, daddy kink, ass slapping and fluff overload. Heavy alcohol use, swearing and alludes to murder (the plot from the movie).
Word Count: 8,770
GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @roooogers go check them out💜
Shoulder To Cry On
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“Please, Anthony. Please. Don’t do this” your voice shaking with the fear of losing the one person who you assumed would always be around. Your brain trying to register everything he’s just said as tears drown your vision out causing everything to go blurry. 
Weak body, silent screams and shaky hands. It’s real. But it doesn’t feel real. It feels like a dream. Like if someone were to pinch you now then you’d wake up and feel fine. But that’s far from your reality. 
“You’re making a scene Y/N, everyone’s looking” he looks around him, watching on as everyone stares in your direction, enjoying the free show as they dine. 
Is he serious? 
“Me making a scene? You chose to do this here in front of everyone, knowing full well how i’d react” the anger coming out, the need to scream consuming you, so you do. You yell. You pick the food up in front of you and throw it at him. Bread, prawns, even your red wine.
“How could you do this to me? You fucking cheating scumbag” bottom lip trembling at the words leaving your mouth, the sick feeling working its way through your body and eventually settling in the back of your throat but you stop it.
You had plans for a lovely anniversary dinner tonight. Your boyfriend of 4 years Anthony. The man you’ve always seen yourself marrying and tonight, you thought was the night. That he’d finally get down on one knee and propose. But that was soon ripped away from you the moment the starters arrived.
He started his little speech about how he’s had the best time over the last 4 years with you, the memories you’ve made together. 
Then came the moment that everyone dreads. The breakup speech. 
He confessed to not feeling as happy as he once did with you and then he admitted to having a connection with some woman at work. His assistant. Jennifer. 
And as much as he played it off like nothing happened, you’ve known him long enough now to see all of the tell tale signs. The way he rubs his ear lobe, the way he avoids your eyes and most importantly the way he stutters when he’s nervous. 
His face has guilt and cheater written all over it. Your whole world feels like it’s crumbling around you and everything is a mess. Including your mascara. 
You always had your suspicions about Jennifer but he was the perfect liar, a genius at concocting up excuses. The way he’d make your mind do a full 180 with your thoughts and feelings. Just like a magician tricking the audience. He pulled the wool right over your eyes and love enabled that, stopped you from asking all the questions that you should have thought to ask.
It’s like now, everything he ever said to you, all the happy memories and plans you made. They all seem so fake, like he never meant any of it. It’s gut wrenching. Sickening. 
He’s a beautiful liar. He did it so effortlessly. Getting into bed next to you after no doubt being with her, touching her in the places he was only ever supposed to touch you.
But before you can even get to him, the restaurant staff make their way over, trying to remove you from the scene but you don’t even give them the chance.
“I’m going. Don’t fucking touch me” you hold your hands up, slipping your coat on and grabbing your purse.
“I hope one day you’ll experience how you’ve made me feel tonight” and that’s the last thing you ever said to him, picking your stuff up to leave.
All that anger and hurt eventually brought you here, the bar right round the corner from your house. You couldn’t bare the thought of even going home right away, let alone stepping foot in there. It’s too soon. 
The house that’s jam packed with memories of the two of you. Photographs of you. The bed you’ve slept in every night with him for 2 years. Your skin itches.
That’s when you see someone sit down next to you at the bar but you don’t look. He still notices you though. Ogling you as he sips at his whiskey. The way your dress hugs your figure, the slit up the side, exposing your legs.
You hear his thick Boston accent ordering. Still refusing to turn your head. You really don’t want any bother tonight. You just need to drown him out. Drown out the way he smells, the way he touches you, the feel of his huge hands all over your skin. 
Ransom doesn’t stop though, stealing glances here and there at you, trying to figure out the perfect chat up line to dish out. Then it comes to him, no chat up lines needed.
“What’s brought a beautiful girl like you here tonight then?”
The smirk that appears on his face comes out in his words, you can hear it but you’re really not in the mood so you order another drink, ignoring the stranger. 
But the second you speak up, your voice giving your state away, causing Ransom’s head to shoot up, leaning closer to get a better look and that’s when he sees it. Your eyes that are filled with tears, the way you’re sniffles follow shortly after they fall.
“Wait, are you okay?” Genuine concern in his voice, not wanting to upset you even more by prodding too much. 
“I’m fine” you spit, just wanting to be left alone to wallow. To over evaluate everything that’s gone down tonight. But that’s kind of hard to do with this man talking non stop.
“You don’t look fine”
“That’s because i don’t need nor want anyones pity” ouch.
“Who said i was pitying you?” he rolls his eyes, not even sure on what’s turned you so cold or should he say who. But he tried. Which isn’t usually in his nature. 
See the events that lead Ransom to that little bar are slightly different to yours but nevertheless, he’s here with you so it doesn’t necessarily matter. The story should probably be told anyway though.
All was going so well in his world earlier today, he was happy as Larry, living off of his Grandfather, taking all he could get from him. He had everything. A bachelor pad that puts his friends one to shame, a beamer, scantily clad women at the click of his fingers and invitations to all the best parties in Boston. He was the most notorious playboy, everyone knows him.
The moment he stepped foot into his Grandfathers study, nothing was ever going to be same once he left. And that’s a fact. 
Harlan broke the news about his will. How he changed it recently. Leaving his nurse Marta Cabrera with everything. Every. Last. Dime. 
Meaning Ransom and his family will be pushed out of the mansion and Walt will be kicked to the curb when it came to Harlans publishing company, Blood Like Wine. 
He argued with Harlan for what felt like forever, tried his best to plead his case and he even resulted to taking a threatening tone to his beloved Grandfather. Which of course, didn’t work. Leaving him angry, furious even. His blood was well and truly boiling. He’d had it. He couldn’t hear another word of that bullshit. So he stormed out. Bidding his great nana a swift goodbye in the form of resting his hand over her arm. 
Once in his beamer, he screamed. Smacking the wheel with all of his might before stepping on it, pulling out the space and up the driveway. He had to get out of there and fast. 
But halfway up the drive, he slams on the breaks when an idea begins to form, causing him to turn around. Parking away from the mansion first before creeping his way back in. 
He climbs the wall at the side of it, up to the secret window that he discovered in his childhood. Once he’s in he finds Marta’s medical bag, opening it and switching his grandfathers meds, making sure to take out the one saving grace that could ruin his perfect plan. 
With that secured in his pocket, the bag is zipped back up and placed back where he found it and he’s leaving the same way he came. Back down the side of the house but before he can make a quick run for it, he sees his great nana in the window. Staring at him, without blinking. He waits to see if she’ll speak but she never does, so he turns to leave, making it back to his beamer without a single person catching him. Great nana doesn’t count, there’s a very slim chance that she didn’t even know it was him. After all, she didn’t say a word.
All done now though, the plan is now in full swing. Soon Marta will take Harlan up to bed to give him his medicine. That’s when she’ll give him the overdose on morphine. Or the good stuff as they like to call it. 
And eventually it’ll start to come together. 
Marta will get arrested for Harlan’s murder, the money and all of the assets that were once hers will be stripped away and they shall all be returned to their rightful owners. His family and him of course. One thing that should be made abundantly clear about Ransom is that he’ll only ever help or get involved when there’s something in it for him. However, he’s not always evil, he has a soft side, it rarely comes out but make no mistake, it’s there alright. 
With his evil plan in place, he heads back home but before he even gets there, he passes a quaint little bar at the side of the road. He could really do with a drink right now. Of course a taxi home will be required but with thousands about to grace his bank account, what’s 10 or more dollars on taxi fairs. Exactly, it’s pittance to him. 
The second he enters, all eyes are on him. All but two. Your eyes. You’re sat at the bar, head in your hands and from what he can see, you’re dressed all fancy. Too fancy for this place that’s for sure. So he makes his way over, noticing the disgusted looks out of the corner of his eye. He’s never been here before, so of course he’s the newbie to all of the regulars.
That then leads to now. 
You turn to face him, your sad eyes meeting his dreamy ones. The only way to describe them. You find yourself on the verge of getting lost before you break the gaze. Nodding towards the barman who slides another shot over to you to which you knock back like it’s nothing before continuing to sip Gin.
Just one look from you and he can see that something isn’t right. 
“What’s got you crying all on your lonesome?”
“More like who” you respond, chuckling as more tears fall.
He opens his mouth to speak but you cut him off “i had the lovely pleasure of being dumped tonight” you muster up your best fake smile, as if somehow acting like everything is okay will suddenly make it all okay for real. But it’s no use, you still feel torn to pieces. Your heart is still on the floor, it’s been stomped on way too many times for you to count on two hands and you’re life is a complete shambles.
He doesn’t love you, Y/N. He doesn’t love you anymore but then again, did he ever? 
“I’m sorry to hear that and for what it’s worth, the guys a jackass for doing that to you”
His comment has your brows furrowing in question. What does he mean by that? But you don’t even get a chance to ask, he can sense your confusion a mile away.
“I just meant that you’re gorgeous. He’s a fool” his nice side coming out to play, he’s never this nice to a woman unless he plans to sleep with her. But this time, it’s different. You’re different. He can never bring himself to pray on you like one of those other girls. Because he can see it, that you’re drained. You’ve had enough. Your ex made a fool of you enough already so who is he to add to that?
“Yeah right, he cheated so i doubt that very much” you snort, knocking back the rest of your drink.
At this point the bartender doesn’t even need you to ask for another, he’s probably realised by now that he should keep them coming. 
“What an asshole” 
Why does he care? He’s just a stranger. But still, you agree with him.
“Yup”
And just like that, a conversation blossoms. 
Drinks flow as you explain the events of tonight and he doesn’t interrupt you. He just lets you speak, it’s almost like he can sense that you just need someone to listen, like all you need is to let out all of your emotions. Even if it is to a complete stranger. 
Who by the way isn’t bad in the looks department. 
Wait. No. You can’t think that. 
Surely it’s fine to think it, just as long as you don’t act on it. Although, you are available now so there would be no harm.
“So let me get this straight. The man took you to dinner for your 4 year anniversary, let you get all dolled up, makeup, hair, nails. The works. Just to break it off with you and tell you he’s met someone else?” his brows raising and you nod, ashamed of how you’ve been treated because ultimately, you really did look like the idiot tonight.
You bought an expensive dress just for this very occasion and you did look the best you’ve ever looked. Radiant and glowing. Your makeup was on point, as was your hair. But now, you’ve got mascara everywhere and you’re way over the line of tipsy.
“I don’t get it. You’re well, you. I mean look at you and he left this for another woman? It makes no sense. There’s no way i’d ever give you up. No chance. No way” the way you feel your cheeks warm at his obvious compliment. You’re almost certain that he’s sweet talking you now. It took him a total of 2 hours. And he finally gave it a go. But you’re not complaining.
“LAST ORDERS” the bartender pulls you from your thoughts. That’s when you turn to look at him, still not knowing the perfect strangers name.
“Um, i guess i should get going” the very sentence makes that sick feeling come back but just like earlier, you push it away, stopping it before it comes spewing out on the bar. There would have been no time to run to the bathroom. 
“I guess i should too” he smiles softly, shrugging his coat on and standing up. 
That’s when the height difference is clear. He towers over you, making you feel small and dainty. 
He gestures for you to head out first and as you glance back over your shoulder, you see him sliding some money to the bartender. No doubt, he paid for all of those drinks that you forgot to even pay for. Fuck.
These heels are way too high and your vision blurs a little as you stumble out the door but before you can even fall to the ground and face plant, he catches you, lifting you up and walking you over to what looks like a taxi.
“Come on you, let’s get you home. Where’d you live?”
Your mind goes blank as you stare at him before muttering “i don’t want to go home, i can’t go home. He’ll be there. Don’t make”
He cuts you off, pulling you closer to him and giving the cabbie his address instead. Wait. His place?
“I guess i should probably tell you my name being as you’re gonna be in my house soon huh?” he chuckles, spurring your own laughing fit. 
“Do tell, mystery man” 
“Ransom”
“I don’t have any money to pay you, not that i need to anyways, just tell me your name”
“No, no. My name is Ransom” his laughter fills your ears.
Strange name. Strange man.
“Surely not” 
“Sure is. Well technically it’s my middle name. But i really can’t reveal anymore than that”
“Well i’m Y/N by the way and can i just say, you smell amazing” ah, the part where you make an utter show of yourself by leaning closer and closer, until your face is inches from his neck. That’s when you inhale really dramatically. Getting a good whiff of his manly scent. It’s intoxicating.
Luckily for you, he takes it all in good humour, probably because you’re drunk. 
The rest of the ride back to his consists of you getting overly touchy, making random comments and with Ransom being the playboy that he is, it’s a real struggle for him not to fuck you here and now. Even in front of the cabbie. It wouldn’t be the worst place he’s fucked.
Yes you’re drunk but your hands are roaming to places they shouldn’t be and now he can feel a situation forming in the shape of a huge hard on.
Not that you notice, you’re too wrapped up in your own drunken state, blissfully unaware.
He can’t fuck you anyway. You’re too drunk. He’ll have to sober you up first.
The taxi comes to a halt and you look out of the windows, noticing a huge house, too posh for the likes of you but clearly fitting for a man like Ransom. He pays the cabbie before getting out. 
You sit there clueless until you feel him scoop you up in his arms. He kicks the the door shut, walking the both of you to his house. He fiddles around in his pocket, holding you up with one arm so that he can open it and put you down on the couch.
“Is this your place?” 
“It is indeed”
“It’s so big”
He lays you down, pointing his index finger in your face as he warns you “stay here, okay? Don’t move”
The child in you starts to emerge, the pout and puppy dog eyes coming out “yes sir”. You salute him and watch him strut away. 
When he returns, his coat is off and he’s just in his white shirt, grey cardigan and his slacks.
“Here, drink this, it’ll help”
“Ew what is this?” your face screws up, disgusted at the taste “are you trying to poison me?”
“It’s just water, don’t be so dramatic. Drink it”
“What if i wanted another drink” 
He just shakes his head disapprovingly. You’re really having none of it and he can’t fuck you like this. He makes it his mission to make sure all the women he’s with can actually remember what’s going on. Plus he needs your consent first. 
“Drink. I won’t tell you again” his scary side showing just a tad but he soon shuts that off, realising how bossy and intimidating he sounds “wait, sorry, i didn’t mean to scare you”
Shouting and confrontation has always scared you. You’ve always had this natural instinct to cower and hide. 
But this time, all you can really do is back up, to the other end of the couch.
“You’re just really drunk and it’s not doing you any good. Especially with everything that you’ve gone through tonight” wow. He’s even surprised himself with that one. 
It’s not that he doesn’t care about you or your feelings because he most certainly does. He’s liked being there for you tonight, even if you did start out as two strangers at a bar. It distracted him from his own drama filled life. But your freaky side was showing on the taxi ride over and it awakened something inside of him.
Not in the way that some may think. Sure he’d love nothing more than to fuck you senseless, make you forget everything even if it’s just for the night but most importantly. He felt something more than just lust when you were touching him. 
And as strange as that is to admit, it felt amazing. Like fucking you wouldn’t just be for the sake of it. You wouldn’t just be another notch on his bed post. It’s almost like his heart knows something that his brain doesn’t know yet.
Eventually he gets you to slowly sip at the water until half of it is gone and then the whole thing. You’re still tipsy but a little better than you were before the water.
“Did you want any food? I could order in? It might help?”
“I mean i did sort of throw my prawn starter at my ex” 
He can’t contain his laughter, leaning back on the couch and throwing a hand over his left boob. You really are hilarious to him. He’s so amused by you and he doesn’t ever want this night to end. Even if it doesn’t end in sex, which it will. He’d be satisfied. 
Something that Ransom Drysdale would never ever think or say. 
“So food then?”
You nod before shaking your head aggressively.
“Actually no. No food. I already feel like i’m going to hurl. Food will just make that worse” 
He seconds that, taking your empty glass from your hands and disappearing to refill it before returning it to you.
“You best drink up then if you aren’t planning to eat”
So you do as he says, stopping after a couple of sips due to your eyes noticing more and more about him that you never noticed before. Like his slicked back hair, his broad shoulders and oh shit. Is that a boner?
It’s gotta be right. 
Your still tipsy self hands him the water for him to place on the coffee table for you and that’s when you do the unexpected. You make your way over to him, sitting way too close. Your bare arms rubbing against the soft and thin material of his cardigan. 
“You alright?” 
The way he acts like he cares, which, he does. It’s soothing, the gentle tone in his voice. The way he’s treating you like you’re glass and he doesn’t want to break you. And he’d be right, because you are delicate. Not your body of course but your heart, your soul, your mind. Not that there’s much left of your heart after Anthony broke it.
“I’m okay, i’ll be better after i get this dress off though” the flirty side of you starts to make an appearance. You look down, twiddling your thumbs as he clears his throat, clearly didn’t expect a comment like that. 
“I guess i could fetch some of my clothes for you to wear?” his suggestion, whilst very cute and gentleman like, isn’t what you were after. And he’s far from a gentleman. You can just tell.
“I don’t think you understood” you turn around, back facing him “i need some help. Please” eyelashes batting as you quickly look over your shoulder at him and seconds later, you feel his hand move your hair to the side. 
The zipper glides down with ease causing the straps to fall down your arms and soon enough. You stand up, letting it fall into a puddle on the floor. Leaving you in nothing but your matching blue laced, bra and panties set. Along with your heels of course. It’s the set that you bought for tonight too. For the sex you never ended up getting.
For the first time ever, Ransom is rendering on speechless, his mouth waters at the most incredible sight in front of him and he can tell from that look in your eyes that you want him. 
Something he never expected to happen so fast. That’s when you sit back down next to him, resting your hand on his thigh.
“You know i should really thank you for tonight”
“Honestly, it was nothing” his words are aimed at you whilst his eyes are fixated on your body, not even trying to hide it from you but you just lap it up. You could use some attention right now. After all, your confidence was knocked with your ex boyfriend’s revelation.
“No, really. It was nice. You’ve been amazing. So let me thank you” but before your lips can touch his, he pulls back. Looking at you as his hand caresses your cheek, staring into your eyes like he’s looking into your soul and you feel close to naked in more ways than one.
That’s when his lips crash to yours in an intense and very heated kiss. As his hands roam around your half naked figure, you position them at the back of your bra, signalling to him that you want him to remove it. Which of course, he does. 
He pulls away for a couple of seconds, taking a moment to look at your breasts. And the way he cups them with his large hands before using his thumb and index fingers to pinch at your now hard nipples, has you moaning into the kiss. Leaving your lips parted just enough for his tongue to slip in, adding to the build up. 
The battle for dominance begins and it goes back and forth between you both, your hunger is very much profound. As is Ransom’s. The moans he’s eliciting are almost porn star like and he’s barely even touched you. But that’s the beauty of it, it feels so good that you’re keening for more. Which earns a low and raspy chuckle.
It doesn’t take long before you’re straddling him, legs either side with your hands cupping his face. His hands rested on your waist, squeezing slightly, almost like he’s making sure you don’t go anywhere. And after the day he’s had. He needs someone, whether he admits it or not. He does. 
But that’s all he’s ever wanted. Is someone. Someone to talk to, someone who will listen and be there. He can’t complain about how that’s not the case though, he’s brought it all on himself. The loneliness, it’s killing him but he chooses to push everyone away. 
His family though, that’s all them. They made him this way. A scheming, money grabbing playboy. It doesn’t mean the facade doesn’t drop once he’s all alone though.
However, it never drops around others. So why is it dropping around you?
“God, i needed this” he pants, in between his kisses that he’s peppering from your lips to your jawline and then your neck. It takes him next to no time at all to find the one spot that drives you insane and when he notices the way your whole body shivers. He smirks, sucking and biting it along with the equal amount of wet kisses.
“Me too. Fuck, right there” you mewl, back arching in his hands as they splay across it before moving down to settle on your panties. His finger traces the top of them, following them as it dips into your ass before giving your ass cheeks a hard smack. 
God if this is how incredible you feel just kissing and touching the man then sex must be a real first place prize.
Just the way he’s handling your body alone is enough to send you over that sweet cliff but you stop it, holding back by pushing his face away from your skin, interrupting the hickey he was clearly in the middle of making.
“I wasn’t done with you, come back here” 
You stop him again “i need you” you whisper frantically, both of your chests rising and falling. Your heart is beating like crazy.
“Patience baby” he winks, standing up with you in his arms, legs wrapped around his waist and your arms holding onto his broad shoulders for support as he carries you up the stairs and into what looks like his room. 
Before you even have time to pause for so much as a second, he throws you to the bed. 
“I wanna take my sweet little time with you” he starts, the bed dips as he gets on it, hovering above you “gonna worship every inch of your body” he lowers himself so that he can kiss your lips, then your jawline, then your neck and then eventually, the valley between your breasts.
“Gonna show you what your worth baby, prove to you that you’re better than that scum who didn’t treat you the way you deserve” also something that’s unlike Ransom. But if there’s one thing he’s a pro at, it’s pleasuring a woman. He knows what the fuck he’s doing. He can talk the talk and walk the walk. Which he’s about to prove to you right now. 
He lowers himself down to your sex, the way the pool is growing more and more is obvious, he can smell it and even see it, the way the light blue material has darkened around your tight hole.
You spread your legs open wider, your way of inviting him in. Of course he accepts. He starts off by pressing a thumb down onto your clit, moving it around in circles and causing you to jolt. You’ve been craving someone, anyone at this point to touch you there. Maybe that should have been a sign that things were doomed with you and Anthony since he’s not touched you in months. Maybe that was a sign you should have seen, a red flag that you were too blind to notice.
“Look at you, so flustered already. God i can’t wait to fuck you” 
“Please” you beg, pathetically.
“Nuh uh baby, i told you i wanna take my time, starting with this pretty little pussy” he hooks his fingers into the hem, using that to pull them down and off of your legs before throwing them behind him, not caring where they land. 
“My oh my, it is a pretty little pussy, isn’t it. God you’re soaked baby, all this for me?”
“All for you” your confirmation leads him to lick his lips before pressing a couple of open mouthed kisses to the inside of your thighs.
“That man is an idiot. But i guess his loss is my gain. Ain’t that right baby” he winks as his kisses get closer and closer to your arousal covered hole. 
“Ransom, plea- OH FUCK” his mouth latches onto your clit, sucking as his tongue flicks across it rapidly. A sensation you’ve never felt before that makes your breathing hitch, your hands run through his locks, no doubt messing them up, not that he’s showing any signs of caring.
All that Ransom cares about right now is making you feel good, making you cum.
“Like this baby? Like my mouth all over you?” his eyes meet yours as he uses his fingers to spread you open so that he can really get a good eyeful “you’re dripping” he murmurs, almost like he’s talking to himself and not to you. He slowly slides one finger in before resuming his attention on your folds and your bundle of nerves. 
“More, i need more. I need you” as flattered as he is by your desperation and need to feel every inch of his thick cock, he has to prepare you. Most of the women he’s been with have never had someone as big as him before, so he always likes to get them ready and you are no exception. 
“Patience baby, you’ll have me. All in good time” 
His raspy voice has you melting alone and the way he’s working you over, slipping a second digit in, should be criminal. How can a man like this be single and alone? It makes no sense. Plus it doesn’t hurt that he’s loaded too. 
It’s a mystery that you’ll be sure to get to the bottom of once you’re done here. 
A third finger is added and he’s curling them all more and more each time he bottoms out, your back arches again, your grip on his hair gets tighter. But he doesn’t flinch. Doesn’t stop. Not even for a second. He’s a man on a mission right now.
The way he’s sucking on your clit, the way his fingers are filling you up and the way he’s slurping at you like a drink is something you’ll never and could never compare to anything you’ve ever experienced. He’s a literal god and he has your walls fluttering around him, your clit pulsating in his mouth.
“Feel the way your squeezing me baby, you gonna cum? Huh? Gonna cum all over my fingers” the pure filth that he’s spewing, is what has you coming face to face with stars. And Ransom can feel the way your hips bucks up into his face, the way your hands keep him locked there until they are pushing him away due to how sensitive you are. He doesn’t budge though.
He just laps at your sex again and again before finally withdrawing his fingers, noticing your slick coating them and dripping down his hand.
“Jesus, looks like somebody made a mess”
You can’t help the way your cheeks warm in embarrassment which he soon puts to bed by stuffing his fingers in his mouth to clean them off. Every last drop. 
That’s when he takes it upon himself to drink directly from you, sticking his tongue into the honey pot, taking everything you have to offer “god so fucking sweet. I can’t get enough baby, tastes so fucking good” 
A flirtatious giggle escapes, your hands covering your mouth but he rips them away.
“Don’t ever feel embarrassed or shy around me” 
“Are you gonna fuck me now?” your teeth bite at your bottom lip as you shiver with the anticipation of what’s to come from him. His silence is deadly but exciting.
“Indeed i am” 
He can most likely hear your heart race as he pulls away, getting off of the bed to undress himself. Starting with his cardigan and shirt. Once it’s off, his abs are revealed, his biceps are huge. You have the biggest urge to kiss him all over that chiseled body, sculpted by some kind of god. He’s gotta be a fantasy.
“But first baby” he trails off, pulling his slacks down and stepping out of them “you’re gonna suck my cock, get it nice and hard with that mouth of yours before i ram it into that tight little cunt” he pulls his boxers down, stepping out of them too and kicking both to the side before stalking closer.
You gulp, your eyes widen... he’s huge. Really huge. Thick too. Does he even need your mouth?
“What’s the matter baby? Is someone intimidated?”
“No” your denial, whilst very cute, isn’t believable. But he’s still going to let you have a go at wrapping that mouth around it.
You scoot off of the bed and fall to your knees, feeling even more dainty than you did before when he was towering over you like a giant. 
“Don’t be shy baby, get to work” 
Your hand wraps around him with your thumb swiping the pre cum that’s oozed out of the slit and you immediately pop your thumb into your mouth. You just want a small taste and as soon as the salty-sweet droplet hits your tongue. You all of a sudden crave more of it.
“Nice?” he asks, cocking a brow up “delicious” you smile, adding to his already blown up ego.
You gradually welcome him into your mouth, opening wider as each inch passes your lips until he’s almost bottomed out. That’s when you open wider and his tip hits the back of your throat making you gag, saliva dripping from the corners of your mouth.
“You look so good taking all of me in that mouth, bet you’ll look even better when you’re taking me in that cunt”
Is he trying to kill you with his dirty talk? Most likely.
He’s a different man to the guys you normally go for. Maybe that’s where you’ve gone wrong. You’ve let yourself settle for mediocre sex, mediocre relationships and maybe that’s why you’ve never been truly happy, like happy to your very core. You’ve never fully believed that you deserve the world. Never known your worth.
He grips the sides of your head, stilling your movements so his can begin and he doesn’t go easy. His thrusts have you making an even bigger mess, more saliva dripping down from your face to the floor. He’s loving every second of it though. But soon enough, just as quick as he started, he stops. Pulling out and looking at you, content with what he sees. 
“God you’re fucking beautiful like this, on your knees for me like a good girl. Get on the bed baby” you do as you’re told, sprawling out on the bed and waiting for him to join which of course he does. As soon as he gets a condom out, taking it from the wrapper and sliding it down his shaft. Size XL. You spy before he tosses the wrapper into the bin. 
“You ready?” he asks, resting his tip between your legs and lowering his body so that he can slide his arms underneath your shoulder blades. His face inches from yours. 
“Please, i need you now” and with that he slides home, not stopping to let you adjust to every inch as it comes. You can feel your pussy stretching, the way it stings slightly but it also feels incredible. It’s bliss. 
“S’tight baby and s’warm. Feel that pussy stretching around my cock” 
Your eyes roll back as your head lolls to the side, presenting your neck to him and giving him the opportunity to finish what he started earlier, which of course he does. 
And the second is lips are on your skin, his pace picks up and the pain turns to pleasure. You feel him so deep inside of you that you just know if he were to pull out that you’d feel emptier than ever.
“God, yes. Ransom. Fuck” your legs wrap tight around his waist, forcing him in even deeper if that’s possible at all but still you do it. Wanting nothing more than to feel as much of him as physically possible.
So you wrap your arms around him, your fingers tracing shapes on his back, causing him to shiver and growl loudly “fucking take this cock baby, take it like a good girl” he starts, adjusting his pace from fast and rough to slow and hard. Ramming in each time he speaks “such a good girl” thrust “loving every inch of this cock huh?” thrust “god this pussy” thrust “is gonna have me cumming way too quick” thrust.
“I can’t have that now can i?” that’s when he shocks you, flipping you over so that you’re on top “ride me baby, show daddy what you got” the nickname he uses for himself has your walls spasming, catching his attention.
“Oh you like that huh? Such a dirty girl for daddy, aren’t you?”
“Yes daddy” despite never using that in the bedroom before, it feels weirdly satisfying, having him refer to himself as daddy and seeing how he gets when you call him that too, the way his mouth hangs open, the way his cock twitches. 
It’s something you’ll never forget.
You start off by collapsing onto his chest, your breasts pushed up against his pecs as you slowly lift your ass up before sinking back down onto him, earning a hiss. 
“Yeah just like that, make daddy proud baby” so you do, you go again. And again. And again. Getting quicker each time until you’re a pro at it. You then sit up, continuing to bounce up and down, grinding as he bottoms out, with his initial instructions of course. He guides you through it and before he even tries to help a second time, he takes his hands away, noticing how you’re doing it all by yourself.
Grinding like the whore he’s turned you into. You can’t help the confidence beaming off of you as you go to work, slamming yourself down on his cock eagerly. You need that sweet release now more than ever, as does he.
“That’s it baby, make yourself cum” 
The best pout and puppy dog eyes make a return “fuck me. Please daddy” and who is he to say no to you?
“You’re gonna be the death of me i swear” he flips you over again, keeping himself seated deep inside of you as his pace turns animalistic. 
“Mhmm, give it to me, i’m gonna cum” you plead, not that he’d ever deny you a mind blowing orgasm in the first place as it’s clear you’ve never had one like the one he’s about to give you.
“Bet he could never fuck like this huh? Make you moan like a fucking porn star for him. Gonna have your legs shaking baby, hold on to me” 
So you do. 
Your grip tightens around his neck. 
With every hit to your g-spot, he nudges you closer until yet again, stars cloud your vision and your toes curl. Your back arches up so that you’re chest to chest and you cum with a shaky and satisfied cry. He doesn’t stop though, plowing into you to chase his own release. Your legs are most definitely shaking.
Your walls continue to clamp down on him, spurring it on. 
“God i’m gonna cum”
“Cum for me daddy” is all he needed to hear to go crazy and that’s when he spasms himself. His thick seed filling the condom and his thrusts get slower and harder. Riding both of your highs out. 
Your breathing is heavy, your heart beat is out of control but you feel complete. 
You’ve never experienced anything like that before. 
He pulls out, disposing of the condom and rushing into the en suit for a second before returning with a wash cloth. He uses it to clean you up, taking his time and making sure to be extra careful with you. You try to prop yourself up on your elbow but struggle due to him fully ruining your body.
“Just relax baby, let me take care of everything” he presses a couple of kisses to your thighs and then your stomach, pausing to throw the wash cloth into the hamper before making his way back up to your lips.
He lays down next to you, pulling you into his side and draping an arm around your body so you lay your head down on his chest.
“So” you both say at the same time, causing a laughing fit to erupt.
“That was certainly an experience” 
“I told you that i was gonna worship you and i think you can agree i delivered” 
“You did more than just deliver Ransom”
“Please do tell me more” he laughs, stroking your hair.
“How on earth are you single?” the question that’s been on your mind since you and him got talking at the bar. He’s acted in a way that not many men do these days, it’s hard to believe no ladies are lining up to be with him.
Plus his dick and head game is A-1.
“I’m single more by choice than anything else”
“How come?” you feel bad for asking but surely if you were over stepping the line then he’d say.
“I mean, my family life hasn’t always been the best. I’ve learnt to not trust anyone that i’m related to and growing up with parents that just chucked money at stuff to solve it. If i was upset then it was always take this money, go shopping. Or if i needed my mother for girl advice it always lead to my dad telling me i should never trust women which is rich seeing as he cheats on my mom all the time”
It’s quite sad actually, a man that seems to have it all together, is clearly broken inside.
“I’m sorry, that’s awful. I’m guessing that’s why you’re single then, why you choose to keep away from dating”
“Yup. I prefer to just fuck with no strings attached. It’s easier, I don’t have to do anything other than make them cum. I’m not filled with pressure to be the perfect boyfriend. I can just relax but sometimes it gets lonely”
“How’d you mean? Sorry if i’m prying” you rest your head on your hands as you look up at him, his finger tracing shapes on your back now.
“It’s fine honestly, don’t sweat it. I guess the best way to explain it is that i can have all this money from my grandfather, all the cars, girls and friends in the world but i can’t trust any of them enough to let them see me when i’m laying in bed at night. The times when i just want someone to hold, someone to hold me, tell them about my day, hear about theirs. Someone to wake up next to and fall asleep next to. But whenever a woman gets even remotely close to me in a way that is too deep. I back off, i give her the cold shoulder and just ghost. I get freaked out because to me, there’s nothing scarier than someone seeing all of me, the good, the bad and the ugly”
It takes you just a second to realise, he’s just bared his soul to you. After saying that he backs off whenever a woman gets too close. After saying that he struggles to trust. That he’s scared of being himself around someone. He’s just been himself around you. And you have no doubt that he feels comfortable enough with you to do that so that’s gotta count for something, surely.
“I get it. It’s hard. Loving someone is easy but allowing them to love you, that’s the scary part. Because ultimately when you let someone in enough to let them love you whole heartedly it opens you up to the chance of heartbreak i mean, look at my life”
You both laugh a little “It’s not even just regular heartbreak, it’s the fear of being cheated on, having my trust shattered. Having someone use me for my family’s money”
“Well, for what it’s worth. I think you need to just bite the bullet, let that guard down. How do you ever expect to find what you want and need if you’re not willing to open yourself up to it. It’s a risk that is worth it sometimes, that eventually, all the heartaches will lead to something greater or someone. Someone that will accept every flaw you have and be there regardless of how messy things can get”
Ransom is just so relaxed right now, he feels at peace, at ease with you. The way you’re listening. Your head rested on his chest, letting him hold you and giving him proper responses, it shows you’re paying attention, you want to be there for him. He’s completely taken back by you. How could anyone want to cheat and leave you, it’ll always remain a mystery to him.
You’re like this ray of light, that came into his life tonight out of the blue. Someone who’s hurting too but somehow you amazing him with the sunshine you provide. You’re everything he’s always wanted in a girlfriend but he’s spent years pushing girls just like you to the side due to fear. Only difference is, he’s able to be himself with you. With them, he could never.
His body lets go as he turns on his side, turning you with him so that he’s cuddling you from behind.
“You’re right. I’ll get there eventually. I just, i need time”
Your silent for a while, taking his words in before you speak.
“Seems like you don’t need any time at all”
That’s when you hear quiet snores from behind you, he’s dozing. And after a couple of minutes, you decide that it’s probably time you see yourself out, you never wanna over stay your welcome and right now with him asleep, you already have.
But before you can even get off the bed, you need to remove his hand from around your frame. Which isn’t going to be easy considering you have to try not to wake him up.
You succeed, finally managing to scoot over to the edge of the bed. But that’s when you hear his tired groans, followed by a hand to your wrist.
“Don’t leave me” his voice is laced with worry
“What?”
“Everyone leaves me” his words break your heart all over again, you’ve been left before and you’re not about to do this to him. Besides, it’s not like you wanted to, you just didn’t think he was the type to want you here all night.
“I didn’t think you’d want me to be here when you woke up”
“Well, you thought wrong. Come back and cuddle, don’t leave like everyone else does”
It doesn’t take much more to convince you to crawl back into his arms. He presses a couple of kisses to your shoulder as you get under the covers with him. Then the kisses move to your cheek and eventually, your lips.
“I’m here to stay then i guess”
“Good”
You feel warm and happy somehow in his arms, like everything has gone away, even if it’s just temporarily.
“Goodnight” 
“Goodnight Ransom. sweet dreams” something you’ve always said throughout your whole life. It’s a nice thing to say and it has him smiling into one last kiss before he closes his eyes for the night.
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cinnaminsvga · 4 years
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🌸 social media au where y/n posts a fake boyfriend application on twitter as a dare but ends up seeking something real in the long run (aka how to fall in love the zillennial way) 🌸
A/N: RIP Jungkook... When will he catch a break, I wonder? Who is Hoseok to him anyway? Much to think about... Also I’m just gonna say this, but Jungkook is literally the most unreliable narrator I’ve ever had to write, so take that in mind when you read this. Enjoy! || W.C. 2K
prev // part 14 of ? // next masterlist here.
[updates every 6PM PST]
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It takes another 10 minutes or so until the maintenance guy manages to rescue both Jungkook and Namjoon out of the elevator. Luckily, the elevator didn’t stop midway between floors so they didn’t have to crawl or climb out, so getting out is a quick and easy ordeal once the doors are opened. Jungkook breathes a sigh of relief, but that moment of calm is short-lived when he hears Namjoon clear his throat behind him.
“Umm… Jungkook-ssi, right?” Namjoon addresses him by his name for the first time. Jungkook jumps up in surprise, though he should have known that you would have ratted him out when you found out he was intentionally ignoring the taller boy.
“I… Yeah. And you’re Namjoon,” Jungkook doesn’t even bother tacking on the question mark at the end, too worn out mentally to bother pretending like he’d only suddenly realized. He rubs the back of his neck, thankful that he’s turned away from Namjoon so that he doesn’t see the flash of annoyance across his face.
Without another word, Jungkook begins climbing the last two flights of stairs to reach your shared apartment. He doesn’t turn to see if Namjoon follows, though he does hear the extra pair of footsteps close by.
When they file into your shared home, the awkward tension magnifies tenfold. While Namjoon and Jungkook had been gone, it seems that Hoseok has already made himself comfortable, laughing jovially at something you said as he helps you bring the last remaining pairs of cutlery to the table. Jungkook looks over at the new visitor from the corner of his eye and notices the way Hoseok has his gaze locked fervently on you as you fussed over everyone’s seating arrangements.
“Oh, Jungkook! Namjoon!” You shove Yoongi’s plate towards him the moment you hear the door open, sprinting over to the two of them. Your hair is in complete disarray, slightly frizzy in places even after you had painstakingly taken an hour this morning trying to look presentable. Even so, Jungkook can’t help the way his heart beats a little faster when you envelop him in a tight hug, as you’ve always looked cute to him no matter what. When he wraps his arms around you to return the embrace, he feels you lower your lips near his ears. “You’re in big fucking trouble, mister. We’re talking after all of this is over,” you whisper darkly. He gulps audibly when you separate, the smile on your face is eerily present.
Thankfully, you don’t hug Namjoon as well, though an apology is out of your mouth before Jungkook can distract you. “Namjoon, I’m so sorry again. I wish I had warned you about the elevator sooner,” you pout, but Namjoon is quick to waive your concerns.
“Hey, it’s not your fault. You didn’t know. All that matters is that we’re here now.” He smiles warmly, his dimples on full display. You clear your throat, staring wide-eyed at him, no doubt dumbstruck by his handsome features. Jungkook tries to relax the tick in his jaw, but to no avail. Instead, he marches past the two blushing fools, eager to get away.
Since your apartment is quite small, you set most of the food onto the coffee table, with everyone either sitting on the floor or on the couch. Jungkook is quick to take a seat next to you on the couch, but that also forces him to have Seokjin on his other side. The elder winks salaciously at him, which Jungkook pointedly ignores.
Namjoon and Hoseok take a tentative seat on the other side of the coffee table. Namjoon’s gangly legs make it difficult for him to fold himself in properly, so you offer to switch places with him instead, much to Jungkook’s dread. Namjoon glances at him for a moment before hesitantly accepting your offer, squishing himself on Jungkook’s right side on their small, sunken couch. He can feel rather than hear Seokjin’s attempts to mask his nefarious giggles.
You seat yourself beside Hoseok, who smiles widely back at you. “Sorry, I totally forgot to introduce myself. I’m Y/N! I’ve heard all about you from Namjoon.”
“Really? Well, I hope it’s only been good things,” he says. “To be honest, I don’t think I’d see you again after that time in––“
“I’m going to fucking start eating now!” Jungkook interrupts, stabbing his chopsticks into the mountain of pork that you had prepared. Somewhere in Busan, he’s sure his mother is cringing at his terrible manners.
For a moment, you seem startled by his sudden proclamation, but you’re quick to shake it off. “Alright everyone! Please dig in,” you say, clapping your hands with a large grin on your face. Jimin is the first to dive into the food, popping a piece of kimbap into his mouth and moaning loudly in satisfaction.
“Y/N, I don’t know what type of crack you put into your food, but MAN this is delicious,” he says, already piling up his plate with anything he can get his hands on. Yoongi is slightly more reserved when he takes a prawn and chews it softly, nodding in agreement with Jimin’s statement.
“Thank you for this meal, Y/N. You must have worked really hard,” Namjoon says, reaching over for some food as well. Jungkook watches as he nearly bumps the plate of ssam off the edge of the table. “Oh, whoops.”
Hoseok laughs loudly, the sudden noise surprising everyone around him. He doesn’t look all that embarrassed, however. “I’ll have to apologize for Joon in advance. He’s a bit of a clumsy guy.” He smiles kindly at Y/N. “You’re gonna have to get used to that eventually, I suppose.”
Jungkook notices the soft blush rising up your neck. His grip on his chopsticks tightens as he takes a particularly rough bite out of his food. “I, um, suppose I will,” you laugh shyly, rubbing the back of your neck while keeping your gaze off Namjoon. You accidentally make eye contact with Jungkook instead, who didn’t have enough time to erase the annoyance out of his expression. You flinch slightly, before softening your voice in that tone you use whenever Jungkook felt a little stressed out. “Jungkook? Are you okay? Is the meat too tough or something?”
Seokjin snorts beside him, nearly choking as he was in the middle of taking a big swig of water. Jungkook hates that he knows that the bastard is enjoying this way too much. Jungkook’s frustration is easy for anyone to see, with only you being left unaware as to why he was so agitated. Your cluelessness only adds to his bubbling anger. “Yeah, Jungkook. Are you alright? Bet you wished there were less people at the table, huh?”
Jungkook is quick to stomp on his foot, causing the prick to yelp in pain. He’s too busy pinching Seokjin in the tit that he misses the way Namjoon’s face falls, dejectedly looking at his food with a deep furrow in his brow.
“Oh? Are you becoming self-aware? Maybe you should take a page out of your book and leave before I kick you out myself,” you huff, scowling at Seokjin. You must have misinterpreted his little side comment, though Jungkook isn’t sure if he should be thankful for that or not. You turn to Taehyung, who has been mysteriously quiet this entire time. “And you. I know I said you could bring a friend over, but I didn’t expect you to bring this soggy testicle!”
Taehyung just shrugs, his attention focused on his phone. “What?” He doesn’t look up, his fingers furiously occupied with something else. “Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. Won’t do it again.” When he finishes his text, Seokjin’s phone dings soon right after. Jungkook’s eyes narrow suspiciously at the two, but neither of them seems to care.
You’re beginning to look flustered, mouth opening and closing as you figure out a way to salvage this mess of a dinner. If Jungkook had been slightly less preoccupied with his own swirling thoughts, he might have thought to comfort you or say something to alleviate the tension. Instead, he has his head bowed in shame, the bitter taste in his mouth unwilling to leave until the boy to his right decides to leave first.
“Anyway,” Yoongi clears his throat, causing Jimin to jump beside him. Normally, Yoongi never spoke all that often when they got together, usually content with eating and listening to the younger ones joke around. He isn’t looking at Jungkook, but he knows that Yoongi must have read his mind. He waves his chopsticks around vaguely at Namjoon. “You. You like woodworking, right?”
Startled from being directly addressed, Namjoon’s posture straightens slightly at the mention of his favorite activity. “Y-yes. It’s a bit of a side hobby that I do when I’m not busy with school or work. I’m… not very good. Just a novice, really.” He laughs, nervously propping his glasses up his nose until they’re nearly up to his forehead.
“Oh, hush! Namjoon is fantastic! I got him to make little wooden figurines to decorate the cafe over the summer, isn’t that right?” Seokjin interjects, reaching over Jungkook to slap Namjoon on the back.
“That’s right! Namjoon, I’ve seen your photos on Instagram! You’re definitely good at what you do,” you say, eyes sparkling with amazement. Namjoon coughs shyly into his hand, but it doesn’t hide the blush painting his cheeks.
Jungkook feels his blood pressure boiling, but he grits his teeth instead. “Interesting stuff,” he murmurs sarcastically, soft enough that only you wouldn’t hear. He senses Namjoon sagging back into his seat, but he doesn’t even feel remotely guilty that he had heard him. Even without looking up, he knows that Yoongi is sending him a warning look in response.
“Namjoon, that’s really cool. I’m an interior design major, so I’d love to see what you might think about the wood pieces I’m thinking of purchasing for an upcoming exhibit,” Yoongi says, trying to salvage the situation. Jungkook glares at him, but the elder doesn’t back down. Instead, he quirks a brow up, as if challenging him to say something.
Jimin gasps, a few bits of rice falling out of his mouth and into the plate of ssamjang. “That’s right! Yoongi, didn’t you say you needed something interesting as a center piece for the dining table? Maybe Namjoon can help you with that!”
Namjoon flushes, waving his hands and shaking his head fervently. “Ah, no! I don’t think I can help you with that. I’m sure you can ask plenty of other professionals who are more capable than I am.”
“No, Namjoon. You should help them,” Hoseok quips. He’s got a pout on his face, causing his cheeks to bunch up cutely. Like a fucked up squirrel, Jungkook thinks petulantly, hating how childish he was being but unable to stop. He steals a look at you to see that you’re staring at Hoseok, too. Hoseok pumps his fist up, “Namjoon’s great! He’s just being humble, that’s all.”
“I’ll be sure to ask you for help then, Namjoon.” Yoongi smiles wide, his pink gums appearing for the first time that night. It’s the kind of smile that makes you feel good, like being praised without words. Emboldened by Yoongi’s kindness, Namjoon smiles back, his previously dejection slowly washing away.
Jungkook feels betrayed. He can’t stand sitting in this room anymore, not when all his friends, most especially you, were being so buddy-buddy with this new unwelcome addition to your party. He puts down his chopsticks onto his dish, standing up and making his way over to the kitchen sink.
“Kook? What’s wrong?” You stand up as well, walking towards him. When you reach out to touch his shoulder, he accidentally slaps your hand away on instinct, head fuzzy with too many thoughts. You gasp, cradling your hand to your chest even though he hadn’t hit you that hard. You were mostly shocked, not used to seeing Jungkook so… touchy, and for seemingly no apparent reason. If only you knew, he thinks to himself.
“I have to go. Stomach ache,” is all he says before he’s grabbing his coat from the rack and shoving on his boots. He grabs his car keys, unwilling to turn around to see the expressions on all your faces. “I’m heading to the pharmacy. See you.” He slams the door shut behind him, leaving you more confused and hurt than ever before.
“Well, this sucks, huh?” Seokjin nudges Taehyung with his foot. Taehyung, to his credit, jabs Seokjin straight in the balls.
“Back to the drawing board,” he sighs to himself, rubbing his temples as the elder groans obscenities back at him. This is going to be harder than he thought.
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my-fanfic-library · 5 years
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Something Different {BBC Dracula x Reader} [17]
Masterlist
~^*^~
Your eyes were glued so where he had just stood before you. A vile mixture of emotions filled you up and you suddenly felt excruciatingly nauseous.
“Jack, I think we should go.”
“We haven’t been here long, are you feeling ok?”
“...I,” you continued to look at that spot, “I think my prawns were bad. I’m gonna puke.”
Your legs suddenly became weak. It was definitely just bad seafood. He hadn’t truly been there. He couldn’t survive in the sunlight. But... what if he had found you...? The last time you saw him, things had been on a sour note.
Oh god.
The blood left your face and a cold sweat overcame you. Anxiety had never hit you this hard before. You knew that if you took one step, you’d fall.
“Okay, you’re freaking me out. Can you walk?”
A bout of tinnitus began and you couldn’t hear him anymore. You felt dizzy. The intense shock and fear had rendered your body useless. You shook your head, but you couldn’t hear his reply.
Jack didn’t hesistate to sweep you up into his arms bridal style and you buried your head into the crook of his neck. You closed your eyes and tried to focus on breathing. Slowly, not wanting to make a movement too harsh to cause you to vomit, Jack carried you from the one side of Whitby, all the way to the other, near the crossing on the train tracks and placed you into his car. Your head rolled back and you groaned.
You felt awful.
With all of the unavoidable potholes and bumps on the road, the drive back to Robin Hood’s Bay felt like forever. By the time Jack was helping you out of the car, your head was spinning like crazy. Once again, Jack pulled you up into his arms and made no detour in taking you to bed. As soon as you were in, you blacked out.
A second fever dream came to you that day.
A wasteland of grey. It stretched out for what seemed like forever. The sky was grey as well. You turned around, coming to face a box. It stood still for a moment before beginning to violently shake. It rocked from side to side, and you expected it to topple over. Taking a cautious step backwards, you watched as the lid burst off. A burnt, mangled, steaming arm came out and pulled up a similarly singed body. Flesh had melted off, exposing bone, and part of her lip had gone. Her hair was thin, brittle strands and most of its volume burnt to nothing. Her blood had boiled to black and oozed from every oraface that had been created by the semi-burning of her being. You screamed but no sound came out.
“Bloofer lady...” her voice hissed.
As if it hurt to walk, she limped on both legs, nearing you with a crazed look in her eye. She continued to repeat those two words as she continued her way towards you. Every step she took, the more you saw just how badly burnt she was. Her skin had bubbled and festered with the heat, all kinds of bodily fluids oozing from burst blisteres. It had charred in most places where it hadn’t simply melted off. Smoke came from her body.
You trembled as you turned and standing some metres away was the figure. It was the burnt corpse of Lucy Westenra or the mysterious figure that had protected you from the flames last time.
Breaking into a sprint, you felt like you made no progress in trying to meet the man. However, Lucy seemed to be gaining on you. You began to cry.
When the first tear dropped down, the entire wasteland bloomed into green. The sky became a vibrant aquamarine and the sun burst free. The figure was before you in a second and it was him. It was his lovely smile, his adoring eyes, everything was still the same. He took you into his embrace and held you close, commanding the disgusting being that was once Lucy Westenra to leave.
“[First],” he whispered into your ear and your heart did a summersault, “come back to me.”
You jolted up in a cold sweat.
“JACK!” You cried at the top of your lungs.
There was a fanatic thud as he jumped from the sofa and made his way up the stairs to you. When he opened your door, you were silently crying.
“Hey, shhh, it’s okay,” he hurried to you, clambering onto the bed and pulling you into him, “it was a dream.”
“He was there,” you whispered, “and so was Lucy... but she didn’t look like Lucy...”
Jack knew what horror you had encountered in your sleep. He bit his lip and squeezed you tighter.
“It wasn’t real. It was a dream.” He reassured you, “here, I’ll go out and grab you some sleep relaxers, if you had bad seafood you’re probably gonna have some bad dreams.”
“That would be nice.” You smiled only slightly.
“Okay, why don’t you take a bath and calm down while I’m gone?”
You only nodded in reply.
~^*^~
The bathroom was steaming up. You heard the front door slam shut and then lock. Jack was gone. You knew he’d be a little while considering how far out you lived. Tugging up your shirt, you sighed. Your body felt groggy and kind of disgusting with such a thick layer of sweat. When you were finally ready to step into the growing tub of water, you turned just to grab the book you’d brought in with you to occupy your mind and screamed so loudly you thought that you had broken your voice box.
The terror, first of all, of being accompanied in the bathroom whilst being naked mostly caused the scream. It was also the stupid grin he wore on his face and the relief that he had somehow... stayed.
“Finally, I was beginning to wonder when he’d leave. It’s been a while, [First]. You’re looking more delicious than ever.”
Your hands flew up to your chest and you pulled the shower curtain in front of you to conceal yourself.
“What the hell are you doing in here?!” You shrieked.
“Nine months, an almost death - though I suppose you thought me truly dead and mourned me - and all I get is a rather rudely posed question as to why I’ve come to see you? Didn’t you miss me at all?”
“You fucking asshole!”
“Darling, are you in shock?
“Shock?! You’re meant to be dead! You drank Zoe’s blood! That was poison to you! You- you-!”
“I trained Renfield well. And luckily for me, you trusted him with my body. The first thing I did when I was freed from the Foundation was have another box of my soil brought to me. Luckily for you, it was enough to revive me.”
“How long?” You inquired, squeezing tight on to the shower curtain. You felt too exposed.
“Just over a month. I’ve been looking for you.” He stated plainly.
“Did you know Renfield killed somebody?”
“Yes. Isn’t he a wonderful specimen? I thought that girl was the best bride I had. Turns out it was the lawyer all along.” He mused, obviously surprised at his findings.
It went silent for a moment.
“Ok, not to sound rude but could you, like, get out?”
“Why?” You wanted to stride over there and hit him.
“Because I’m naked?” You rolled your eyes.
“Trust me, I have no issues with that.”
“Well I do!”
And then it hit you. It had taken a moment of true conversation with him to settle in. But Dracula truly was here. He’d come back to you. He had survived drinking Zoe’s blood and had searched for you until he had found you. You wanted to cry. It would never be outed to Jack, but you had genuinely missed Dracula.
He was looking at you, waiting for you to make your move. You didn’t intend on standing there naked all day.
“Can you pass me my clothes?”
“They’re right there.” He pointed out. They were just out of arms reach.
“Yes, but I can’t quite reach them.”
“Sure you can.”
“Dracula.” You warned.
“[First].”
You huffed. He was standing very comfortably on the other side of the room. He wouldn’t help you. Gripping hard onto the shower curtain, you began to stretch forward. In your mush of emotions, it slipped your mind that shower curtains could actually move and when the hoops on the rail slipped forwards with your weight as you leaned down, you lost your footing in shock.
And down you went, backwards into the steamy water. Dracula could not hold back his hearty laugh and once you had regained your senses, you sent the dirtiest glare his way. You pulled yourself up and his laugh stopped. The smile melted off of his face and something glazed over his eyes. He inhaled, even though he had no need to. It was a reaction. Like when the doctor hits your knee and your leg jolts. The way the beads of water cascaded down your curves, every minuscule feature of your body from every line, to every freckle, he memorised it. The slope of your waist, the length of your legs, the shape of your collarbones, the birthmarks. And of course, the way the water rolled effortlessly over your breasts.
Holy shit.
He lost his breath and that wasn’t even physically possible.
He really did love you.
Immediately, you covered yourself once more and the scowl that settled in was deep and full of fury.
“If you don’t get out of this bathroom in three seconds, I’m going to have to kick your ass.”
“[First], sweetheart, I’m a vampire who’s been resurrected. I’d love to see you try.”
“I took Taekwon-Do for six years, I will beat your ass down.” You narrowed your eyes, trying you make your bluff more convincing. Of course you hadn’t really taken any martial arts. You just wanted him out.
“I have a better idea,” he began, “why don’t I just join you? That way we’ll both be exposed and there’s no need to be ashamed.”
Cue a shampoo bottle being thrown at his head. It was then that he decided to get out.
He stood in your bedroom having opened the window and looked up at the sun. He was so relieved to have found you. He felt like he had been looking for so long. After helping Zoe to a comforting death, he nursed himself back to health and the first thing he had thought of when he regained consciousness was you. Sweet you who had captured his heart. He looked up at the burning sun, fighting back tears of happiness.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered, though he didn’t really know who to. He didn’t believe in a God, and even if he did, he would be disowned by the omnipotent spirit. Maybe he was just thanking the force that had lead him to you time and time again.
You didn’t bathe, instead you dried off immediately and joined him back in your bedroom. Your hair was soaked at the ends and Dracula thought that it suited you well.
During the time that he had been gone, reviving himself, you had changed. You’d changed your haircut a little, and you seemed to have filled out just a little. Not enough to be too noticeable to most, but to someone who had spent so long drinking in the sight of you every time he saw you, Dracula noticed. He liked it on you.
You sat down on the bed, eyeing him suspiciously. He simply smirked over at you.
“It’s nice to see you again.” He confessed. You didn’t reply, but decided to start almost interrogating him.
“Since when could you live in the sunlight?” You looked between him and the open curtains.
“Apparently the whole time. Van Helsing was the one who figured it out.” So, he wasn’t going to call her by name anymore?
“I see... how?”
“Vampire lore, you learn to believe it after so long.”
“Like mirrors?”
“No,” he breathed a laugh, “mirrors are a little more complicated.”
“What about all things holy?”
“Well...” he looked down, sucked in his lip and then looked back up at you, “I’ll tell you, since I don’t think anything I tell you would embarrass me after our encounter two minutes ago,” you threw a cushion at him, “it represents the one thing I couldn’t do - that I was too afraid to do. Well, I got the strength but it turns out some things are just more important than dying.”
“Interesting...”
“Anything else you’d like to ask me?” He teased.
You pondered for a moment. Maybe without all of the trauma, it would be different this time around. There was only one way to find out.
“Will you kiss me?”
He didn’t answer. It had been much too long since he last saw you. It had been much too long since he last held you. He craved your touch, the warmth that you gave to him just by being close.
“Don’t bite.” You whispered.
And his lips crashed onto yours. Just like before, you were able to relish in the feeling of his kiss for only a fleeting moment before you were consumed whole.
You were back at that place where the sun shone and it was fertile with greens and flowers of every colour. The feeling that spread through you was euphoric. Dracula stood before you and he beckoned you with his index finger. You complied immediately and found yourself in his arms.
“Mine.” He whispered.
He pulled you close and pressed kiss after kiss to your neck. Here in this hallucinatory haven, you didn’t feel threatened by his lips on your neck. No, you felt so at peace. You felt like you could do anything. Your fingers found their way to the base of his neck, tugging at the lowest stands of his hair. You hummed at the feeling of his lips.
You gasped, and you were back in the bedroom. Dracula’s hand was on your nape and he was looking at you with such intensity that you felt like you could melt. He pushed you backwards, until your back hit the headboard and he stood, moving to the door and locking it. When he returned to you, he lay at your side and pulled you into him.
“Enough of that, will you sleep in my arms?” He mumbled.
“Why did you lock the door?”
“Privacy.”
You snuggled into him. Never had you ever felt so at home. You smiled into his chest as his fingers began to play with strands of your hair.
Both of you would be content on staying like that forever.
~^taglist^~
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breakingsomething · 4 years
Text
the fall part twenty one - rise
basic summary: marvin and naomi try to be normal. the jackson-schneeplestein brothers aren't getting along. and jackie, aaron and rhea do something that may have disastrous consequences.
trigger warnings: mentions of suicide, murder and abuse, experimentation, hypnotism
tagslist: @synonymsforzombie @spicydanhowell @skyewardlight @dreaming-of-stories-and-stars @cest-mellow @graveyardlettuce @lower-your-expectationss
summary of what happened last time since it's been a full month: jamie hung out with his family on his birthday, resulting in a small breakfast over carving pumpkins. anti brought jamie a birthday gift. rhea and aaron had an argument that ended with jackie accidentally hypnotism aaron to make him shut up.
-
"you know," marvin said, pausing to sip his hot chocolate. "this is nice."
"it is," naomi agreed. she fumbled with her muffin, picking out a blueberry and popping it in her mouth. "it's been a long time since i've been on a proper date with someone. years, even."
the two of them had made an impulse decision that morning to go to costa and buy muffins and drinks, and it was turning out to have been a fantastic idea. the weather wasn't the best, and it was drizzling outside, but naomi gleefully exclaimed that she loved the rain, and marvin joked that maybe she was a flower herself and needed it to photosynthesize, and naomi pouted and called him a fire, jokingly suggesting that the rain might put him out and teach him how to have fun. he was very glad they had decided to sit outside now. they could listen to the rain from their cozy spot under the canopy as they drank their warm drinks, watching people go by. the air smelled like fresh rain. like jamie's magic, marvin thought, but less sharp. less cold. jamie was like ice. always had been. it was strange to think about.
"you alright?" naomi asked, snapping marvin from his thoughts. she smirked, shaking cinnamon hair from her eyes as she put on an exaggerated playful tone. "enjoying the view?"
he laughed, leaning forward in his seat. "of course! these muffins are absolutely beautiful, stunning, really -"
she smacked his hand, laughing before taking a chunk out his muffin. "you're right, they are! especially yours." she flashed him a grin, a small smudge of chocolate on her lips. marvin brushed it away with his thumb, grinning and bumping their noses together. he could hear naomi giggling. "you're such a soft bastard. aren't you going to try and steal mine?"
"no, i am not, because i am the one winning," he said softly against her lips, then pressed his mouth to hers. she tasted like chocolate. he pulled away after a moment, chest shaking. "fuck, this is so much harder to do while i'm still laughing."
naomi dropped her head to his shoulder. "such a romantic," she chuckled. "god, we are becoming the sappiest couple, aren't we?"
"maybe so." he ran his fingers through her hair, watching a van trundle down the glistening street. "who cares? life is short, might as well drink hot chocolate and be cheesy in a costa. we're all gonna die anyway."
naomi sat up, shaking her head. "a romantic indeed," she deadpanned, rolling her eyes with a smile. she flicked a blueberry at him from her muffin. "you sure know exactly how to flirt with a girl -"
"hey, hey, hey, i'm clearly - clearly a fantastic flirt," he said, holding up both hands. "you're dating me, after all."
"ha, yes, because i felt bad for your awful romancing skills -"
"rude!"
they continued jokingly bickering as they ate until both muffins were fully gone, partially eaten by each magician. the rain had gotten heavier, and naomi pulled up her hood, tapping her chin as she stared off into space. marvin tapped her arm. "penny for your thoughts?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. naomi jolted then sighed, relaxing into her hand and staring down at her hands.
"i dunno," she murmured. "so much is happening all at once. i feel like it can't all be real. you know what i mean?" she traced a finger round her plate in circles, frowning. "that could be just me. i swear i've been taking my meds."
marvin shook his head. "no, i get it. everything's bullshit, world is a fuck." he glanced around before lighting the tips of his fingers on fire and brushing them over his drink to heat it up again. "but it is real, ok? you're not imagining this or making it up."
she chuckled. "i don't know whether to be reassured by that or not. also, stop with the flames. you'll get us in trouble."
marvin shrugged. "nah, the veil will cover it up," he said nonchalantly, but extinguished the flames anyway. he sighed, rubbing his forehead. "mhm. i'm so tired, nai."
"go to bed earlier, then," she said playfully, but with a quiet tone. she pat his hand, watching the rain fall.
he heard his phone ring.
"shit," he muttered, not moving to answer it. instead, he leaned back in his seat, picking up his spoon and twirling it in the air. "weather's nice."
"your phone's ringing," naomi pointed out.
"let it ring." he reached across the table and kissed her again, touching the back of her head gently. "we should do this more often."
she giggled and was about to say something else when marvin's phone went off again. he sat back with an exaggerated groan, rolling his eyes to the sky.
"place your bets," he announced sarcastically, pulling his phone out and blowing a raspberry at naomi's amused expression. "will it be… chase, calling to ask if i ate the last bag of prawn cocktail crisps? i did, by the way, but don't tell him that. or will it be henrik, calling to ask where i am despite saying i was going out with you this morning? or will it inexplicably be anti, using the scraps of magic he has left to yell at me for some reason? find out within the next couple seconds, because - hello?"
"marvin," came kazuki's voice. "so, bad news. your magic book has been stolen, and i don't think it takes a genius to find out who took it."
-
chase clinked the spoon against the side of a cup as he stirred his tea, pausing to dump more sugar in it. henrik watched all this from the kitchen table, slightly amused. "mein gott, chase, you're going to have a heart attack and die."
"and when that happens, i'll have a doctor right here to save me," chase grinned smoothly before knocking back half the cup. immediately after he did he began to splutter, coughing and dripping tea down his chin. "shit - shit, fuck, hot hot hot hot!"
"lovely," henrik deadpanned, taking a calm sip of his coffee. "how graceful a man you are."
chase flipped him off, wiping his chin as jamie wandered in, confusion plastered across his face. "good morning?" he signed, his expression suggesting it was a question.
"morning, james," henrik greeted warmly. "chase is dying."
"that's not ideal," jamie said, sitting down at the table and stretching his arms out. "are you alright, chase?"
chase nodded, face bright red. "very hot," he coughed. "very very hot. i'm fine, i'll live."
henrik chuckled, shaking his head. "you're a wreck of a man. drink slower. or do i need to talk to you like you're connor?"
chase rolled his eyes. "shut it, you. where's marvin?"
"out with naomi," henrik said, shrugging. "he should be back soon. all dying aside, how are you this fine morning?"
chase finished his coughing fit and laughed, grabbing a tea towel to wipe up the spilled drink. "doing alright. how's you, james? sleep better?"
he nodded, smiling softly, but his eyes were far away. chase frowned, picking up his mug and sitting back down at the table. "hey, what's up?"
jamie shrugged. "anti," was all he signed. "thinking."
"oh, yeah," chase murmured, suddenly interested in his patterned socks. he and everyone else was all too aware of anti's visit a couple days ago to bring jamie his gifts. he noticed henrik had noticeably soured, staring into his mug. chase cleared his throat. "what… what are you thinking?"
another shrug. "don't know. a lot."
henrik muttered something that neither of them could quite catch. chase decided to ignore it, but jamie sat up, looking at him. "what?"
henrik blew the air out his cheeks, watching jamie's hands but not his face. a benefit of speaking sign, chase and henrik had long ago agreed on, was the lack of eye contact. "i don't want to talk about anti," he mumbled. jamie's face fell just slightly.
"ok," he signed carefully. "don't have to."
there was a tension in the air now that hadn't been there before. chase caught a breath, sipping his tea cautiously.
"you never ate the cookie he brought, did you?" henrik asked without warning. jamie raised an eyebrow, folding his arms across the table.
"what's it to you?" he said, movements almost flat. the tension was obvious now, and chase found himself standing up to make another mug of tea. why, he didn't know, but his heart was racing and he didn't want to turn to look at the others.
still, he could hear henrik's scowl in his voice. "because he could have poisoned it it something. who knows with that man?"
there was a pause, and chase made himself turn round to see jamie's response. "i know," he was saying cooly. "he's my brother and i know him better than any of the rest of you."
"i'm sure you do," henrik muttered, and both him and chase jumped when jamie suddenly slammed his fist to the table, making henrik's mug bounce. jamie had ice in his eyes, cold and unnerving. despite how ridiculously selfish it sounded, chase was glad he wasn't the one on the receiving end of the glare. if looks could kill, henrik would be very dead.
"if you have a problem," jamie signed, slowly, meticulously, so no one missed a word. "tell me upfront instead of being vague."
the kettle had finished boiling, and chase turned to finish his tea while henrik responded. "well," he heard him say, silent fury evident in his tone. "there is the small detail of your brother having held me in his own torture basement for over two months. i feel like - i feel like, with all the shit going on with jackie lately, you lot have forgotten this!"
chase flinched as jamie's fist hit the table again, slightly less furiously than the first time. "no one has forgotten," he signed, and chase wondered if he was imagining the trace of rain and petrichor in the air. "we know anti is not a good person. and we -"
"you're saying "we" a lot," henrik interrupted, and his gaze was also cold, calculating. he and jamie were never opposites; they were two peas in a pod, far too similar for their own good. "i don't think "you" know anything."
the room went very, very silent.
"you think so." jamie's expression was blank, his hands moving far too slowly. "you think i don't know anything, think i don't understand anti."
"jamie," henrik said, suddenly uncertain. "i - didn't mean -"
"no," jamie said. the smell of petrichor was stronger now, something cold radiating off of the man. "no. you spent two months of your life with anti. silly me. of course you understand him better than i do."
"i wasn't implying -"
"then what were you saying?" jamie suddenly exploded, knocking his chair back to hit the fridge as he stood. chase grabbed his mug, burning his fingers as he held it. "what, that you've seen him at his worst? that i couldn't possibly understand how bad he is? that only you went through trauma and that makes it all the worse for you?"
henrik's eyes were wide, and he managed to shake his head, month opening like he wanted to say something. jamie smirked dangerously, coldly. "oh, now you change your tune. because you remember that i spent - how long? over two years with anti? that i've seen far more of him than you ever will?"
jameson hit the table a third time, cold rage lining his face. "i've seen him at his best and his worst. i've seen him when he's vulnerable and hurting, i've seen him covered in blood after a kill, i've seen him have a panic attack after a nightmare, i've seen him when he's manic and making terrible decisions, i've seen him when he's shaking and desperate for someone to touch him, i've seen him depressed as fuck and joking about suicide, i've seen him furious and not paying attention to who it is he's hurting - and who do you think was there for him each time? who stitched up his wounds when he got into fights that he swore weren't intentional, who comforted him when he was hyperventilating and couldn't breathe through panic, who stopped him from committing multiple murders, who took the blows when there was no one else around?" jameson paused, resting his hands for a brief moment. "that was dear dapper jack. dapper jack the time traveler, dapper jack who was fucking made for anti, dapper jack whose very purpose was to fix anti's mistakes. do you have any idea of the things i've seen?"
there was a very silent pause.
"no," henrik murmured, eyes cast to the table. "i don't."
jameson wasn't smiling anymore, even mockingly. "that's right. you don't. you haven't seen the things i've rewinded, the things only i remember."
he took a shuddering breath, his gaze suddenly far away. "you haven't seen. you don't know how many times i've watched people die, people break, people say things they didn't mean to say. i've seen anti die, did you know? i've seen anti break and nearly kill himself, kill me. i've rewinded in my last moments of life. you - you don't even know it, but i've saved your lives as well. and i remember. i always remember." he goes silent. "i always remember."
chase's tea was lukewarm now. he still didn't drink it. henrik didn't say anything. his eyes were transfixed on jamie's, looking far away.
"so don't you dare tell me," jamie continued, and there was something in his face now - grief, a deep sadness, some kind of pain. "don't you dare tell me that i don't know anything. don't you dare. because i know far, far more than you could even begin to comprehend. far more than i wish i knew."
he raised his hand like he was going to hit the table again, but he didn't. he just stormed out the room, leaving behind only the smell of rain.
neither chase nor henrik spoke for a moment. chase was shaking. henrik was staring into the distance, and then let his head fall to the table, forehead resting against the wood.
"ich bin ein idiot," he mumbled. chase didn't disagree. just sipped his near cold tea and looked away.
-
"this is a terrible idea."
"oh, don't be such a paranoid worrywart, mckenzie. this is going to work perfectly."
jackie, aaron and rhea were in the city centre, sitting next to the fountain and quietly planning things out. rhea had insisted they all went out to get fresh air, which aaron had also protested was a bad idea ("we're literally fugitives running from the magic law, rhea, in what world is going out for no reason a good idea -"), and now the three of them were here instead of at rhea's place. and jackie, quite honestly, was beginning to get tired of the two of them fighting.
"i'm beginning to get tired of the two of you fighting," he sighed, stretching his leg out down the steps. "we're all in the same boat, so why don't we get along?"
"i think i've made my side of this plainly clear," aaron muttered, but didn't say more. rhea smiled up at jackie, and his heart swelled with guilt. he knew why aaron was being more reluctant to fight. his head still hurt thinking about the hypnotism he'd accidentally placed on his boyfriend, and he looked away, staring at the shops across the street.
"we're all enemies of restitutio now," rhea was saying, tapping on the notebook she'd brought along with her to doodle in and take notes that neither jackie nor aaron understood. "so we have to be really careful. i'm probably going to be your best bet, being blake's sister and all. i know how to get in and out. mckenzie, you know where the other two necklaces are, correct? i'm assuming they're in the same place as jackson's one."
aaron frowned. "ok, first of all, stop calling him jackson. second of all, do you not know any of this information yourself? i figured with you being bl- being - being the stiùiriche's sister and all."
rhea smirked at his inability to say the name. "i can call jackson whatever i want. why, does it annoy you? also, blake always hid the information from me. guess he never trusted me, huh? he was right not to, but it still breaks my heart." she clapped a hand over her chest, expression unchanging. jackie sighed, preparing to jump in the middle of another fight.
but he didn't have to. aaron just grinned sharply, shaking hair out his face. "ah, so you're relying on the dunderhead to get you the necklaces, huh? how funny. yes, i know where they are. do we have, like, a map of the place?"
rhea rolled her eyes. "a map? are you serious? oh yes, mckenzie, i have a map of the goddamn secret magic organization base that my family has been working to keep hidden for years -"
aaron threw up his hands. "ok, so there's no map, i get it, chill. sorry for insulting your bloodline or whatever." he grabbed rhea's notebook from the fountain steps and began to draw, much to rhea's loud dismay.
"did you - are you drawing a map?" she asked in disbelief. "how do you remember the layout so well?"
"i just do," aaron sing-songed, the red pen gliding across the page. "with our knowledge combined, then i suppose we'll know enough that this isn't a suicide mission. rhea, you're taking the stiùiriche, yeah?"
she nodded. "yep. shouldn't be too hard, he's a pussy when it comes to me. loves me too much, even though i've done such terrible things." another smirk split her face. "so full of weakness. he and your anti are very similar. think themselves strong but are honestly just pathetic. slightly unrelated, but do you guys wanna hear something fun?"
jackie nodded while aaron groaned. "is this something that's gonna get us killed?" he sighed deeply. rhea placed a finger over her lips, gathering up her stuff and leaping to her feet. jackie and aaron scrambled after her, exchanging glances.
"here's a secret," rhea said, and she appeared to be leading them to the co-op on the corner. "i'm not actually a shapeshifter. i know, surprising, right? but i'm not."
aaron snorted softly as they entered the shop, the air instantly warmer and the bustling of people replaced with the hum of a heater. "like hell you're not. we've seen you do it."
rhea grinned. "have you? have you really seen anything? nothing is real anymore, mckenzie, better get used to it."
"if you're not a shifter, then what?" jackie interjected quickly before aaron could say anything in response. "you can change your appearance and such. that's something i'm certain of."
rhea walked down the frozen food aisle, casually inspecting the variety of pizza brands. "i can change my appearance, yes, but not like that. you both know of the veil. what would you say if i told you it was possible to control it?"
jackie blinked. "i'd say… nothing surprises me anymore?"
rhea grinned. her eyes changed from golden yellow to bright pink, growing larger, hair shrinking back into her scalp as her nose turned up and smile became wider, teeth darkening to a near solid black. "not real," she said, and skipped down to the next aisle, grinning at them before changing back with a crack. "just an illusion."
"you're… you're saying you can manipulate the veil?" aaron said skeptically. he crossed his arms firmly. "prove it."
rhea cocked her head, raising an eyebrow. then she walked up to the cash register, a spring in her step, and grabbed a bag of popcorn and a chocolate bar from the shelf next to it. looking the woman behind the counter dead in the eye, she turned and left the store without paying. jackie and aaron followed, mouths agape in shock.
"how did the cashier not notice?" jackie said in disbelief, following rhea back to the fountain. rhea shrugged, smiling wickedly.
"veil manipulation," she said casually. "you could probably do it too. not as well as me, but you could do it. here, let me show you."
she raises her hands, motioning for the other two to follow her. jackie does so, feeling a bit silly. "you have to concentrate on what you want other people to see. it's like knitting in the air, but with illusions. have either of you done illusions before?"
jackie nodded, while aaron shook his head. "i specialize mostly in attack based magic," aaron explained.
"and i used to do light based illusions for -" jackie paused, stiffening. he didn't want to think about chase's kids right now. "yeah. is it anything like that?"
rhea raised an eyebrow at jackie's cutoff, but didn't press it. "in a way. but it's not like manipulating a real thing you can see. light is different. you're taking actual strands of light from the sun, or from fabricated light if you're indoors, and weaving them into shapes. the veil is different because you can't see it, and you can only feel it if you're connected to it. and if you want to connect with it, you have to understand exactly what you're doing. let's start simple." she turned to them, cross legged, and slowly blinked. her eyes changed from gold to purple. "you have to be confident, and you have to be aware. falter, and the illusion falters."
both men blinked, practically straining with the useless effort. "how are you so good at it?" jackie asked, frustrated.
"years of practice," was the response. "since i was born. my mother taught me. she always favoured me over blake, and she was an incredible magician. better than my father, i'd say. honestly, me and blake should have fought for the position of stiùiriche. i would have won." her eyes cleared and she shook her head, realizing how off track she was getting. "but yes, it's hard. we'll have plenty of time to learn later." she straightens, pulling out her notebook again and grinning at jackie and aaron satisfactorily. "for now, we have a magical organization to rob."
-
"so," aaron said. "this is it?"
jackie could not believe the irony of there being a secret entrance to restitutio right next to anti's old waterworks. a crack in the universe just between the trees, a literal hole in reality that no one else had ever found. "holy shit," he breathed, shaking his head in shock. "no fucking way. no fucking way this has been here since you were a kid and the bastard somehow never found it."
rhea shrugged, trying not to look too pleased with herself. "i found it years ago. when you told me anti used to live here, i almost couldn't believe it." she slipped through the trees, narrowly avoiding catching her hair on a branch. "to be fair, you'd have to be an extremely powerful magician to find this without knowing the spell word, and anti is not, and never was, a powerful magician. oh, bitch boy can teleport and fly as a cloud of static? bitch boy can fuck with computers? he's not special. he can't even fully control it - sorry, couldn't, because he's got nothing now, huh? well." she shot jackie a glance. "almost nothing."
jackie winced, remembering anti's brief teleportation that had managed to hurt rhea. he still didn't understand how that had happened, given that jackie thought he had all his magic. "unimportant now. we need to focus on where we're going. you two know the place far better than i do, so -"
"yes, we know, jackie," rhea snapped. she pulled aside a branch and sarcastically gestured for them to go through. "after you. and when you get inside, duck as soon as you can. go."
"wait, the entrance is here?" aaron started, and rhea rolled her eyes before pushing him through. aaron yelped and - disappeared. jackie was given only a moment to gape before he was pushed after him.
he was now in a black room, and a quick, frantic grab around him told him he was in some sort of closet. there was a door in front that was almost entirely made of glass, and jackie now understood why rhea had told them to duck. he feels aaron beside him, breathing heavily in the dark. "hey," he managed to say aloud. "how's it going?"
"shut up," hissed another voice, and jackie jumped before realizing it was rhea. "we're in a closet that's connected to a hallway, so anyone could just walk by. stay still while i check."
they didn't move as rhea slowly rose, a faint mist around her face. "coast's clear," she said softly, and the door opened with only a tiny click, exposing them to a plain white hall with no other defining features other than a camera on the wall. rhea sighed. "jackson, would you like the honour of fixing that?"
jackie really wasn't accustomed to using anti's magic. but he'd been practicing, and with a single flick of his hand, he could somehow see into the camera, see every inner working, see everything it was connected to. "woah," he breathed, raising his hand higher like he was trying to get a signal. "if this is how anti always saw things, i can see why he went bloody mental."
"hurry up and loop them," rhea reminded, and jackie startled before doing as she asked. with the cameras fixed, they fully stepped out into the hall, pressed against the wall as they caught their breaths, rhea already calculating the way. "ok, so jackie, you keep an eye on the cameras. i'll do my best to hide us all if anything happens. mckenzie, you're our backup in case everything goes to shit. you're our attack dog."
"course i am," aaron muttered, but didn't complain. they set off round the corner, rhea still leading, aaron in tow. they didn't see anyone for a while, and they moved slowly, jackie getting the hang of looping the camera feeds as they went.
suddenly, rhea stopped. "shit!' she gasped, and threw her hands up. a blurry shield of sorts lifted over them, and they all went dead silent as two men walked by, wearing dark outfits and speaking in hushed tones. pressed against the wall, the three of them didn't breathe. jackie could feel all three of their thoughts aligning to please don't catch us, please don't catch us, please don't catch us. he could hear aaron's heart beating and gripped his hand tightly, feeling how hot his palms were.
"- don't understand why she never bloody listens to me," the first man was saying quietly. he had light brown hair and almost greyish skin, a cloak shrugged over his shoulders. "i do everything for her. everything! i gave up meat for her, i basically stopped smoking for her - and yet i'm the problem! what the fuck does she want?"
"maybe you're shite in bed," sniggered the other man, who had dark skin and an unfortunate mullet. "or maybe you're just a dick and she doesn't like you."
the first man elbowed him in the side, slowing to check his phone. jackie's legs were shaking, and he lifted a hand to clamp over his mouth so he wouldn't cry out. "fuck off," the man scoffed as the second man laughed. "she loves me really. she just never cares - i say "i'm off to work," and she says "are you actually going to meet up with edward again" and maybe i am, but she doesn't know that and still doesn't trust me!"
they slowly began to walk again, and the second man slapped the first man on the back. "perry," he giggled, shaking his head. "sometimes i wish you'd listen to the horseshit that came out your mouth before you made me hear it."
the two of them continued bickering quietly as they rounded the corner, and as soon as they were gone, jackie gasped and fell fully into aaron, burying his face in his chest. "motherfucker," he heard rhea say as she dropped the illusion around them. "that guy was a right prick. i hope his partner cuts his d- jackson? fuck, what's up?"
jackie was clinging to the front of aaron's jacket, shaking. "i -" was all he managed to get out for a moment. "mistake, this is bad, we need to stop and go back -"
rhea scoffed. "don't be such a pussy. you get one scare and that's enough to send you running?"
"he said he doesn't want to!" aaron said loudly from above him. jackie felt the man's fingers curl into his hair protectively, holding him close. "and i don't want to either. this is fucking bullshit, and i -"
"hello?"
they all froze.
rhea went very, very pale.
"blake," she mouthed, and grabbed the two men by the collar, yanking them down the hall as fast as she could. they flew through the door to a stairwell and practically fell down them, listening to voices getting closer. at the bottom was another door, which they shoved through into a different hall with a fake window on the end. jackie could barely breathe, wiping cameras as quickly as he could, and then suddenly rhea was shoving them into a room and shutting the door, leaning against the small window. they could see a blurry shape on the other side - jackie couldn't tell if it was the stiùiriche or not - before they disappeared, leaving the three of them in silence.
"thank fuck," rhea whispered, voice very high. "that was definitely blake, and he would have seen through any of my illusions. shit, we're lucky to have gotten away with that."
aaron was tugging on jackie's sleeve. "jay," he hissed. jackie couldn't even turn, just closed his eyes and let his forehead rest against the door.
"where are we now?" he said quietly. his breathing was slowing back to normal, and he shuddered briefly, sighing.
"jay," aaron said again. "jackson."
"we should be just under the floor we were on," rhea murmured. "we're close now, so we might as well -"
"guys!"
they both turned in unison to see what aaron wanted. "what's the pr-" jackie started, before he finally took a look at the room they were in.
it genuinely looked like a lab from a horror movie. the room was lit up blue, a desk and trolley full of beakers and surgical tools next to bottles of multicoloured liquids, like potions. curtains hung over strange rectangular boxes. but none of that was what they were focusing on. in the centre of the room was a large, complex looking bed surrounded by black machines, and in the bed was a man. dark, greying skin and shaved coiled hair, wearing a white hospital gown. tubes stabbed into his skin, connecting to the machine. a nasal cannula on his face. pale and sickly, dead looking. it took jackie a moment to recognize him and when he did, it was like a direct kick to the chest.
"holy shit," aaron said in a high voice. "is that - is that not your brother's ex boyfriend?"
because yes, it was raymond. marvin's bastard ex. jackie couldn't breathe.
rhea stepped forward, eyes sparkling with curiosity. "my god, they did it," she murmured, tapping the side of the machine. "the fuckers went and did it."
"did - what?" jackie managed to choke out. "i - rhea, what are they doing to him?"
rhea turned back and rolled her eyes. "why do you care? it's your fault he's here in the first place. you chose to bring him here. didn't you say you hated him, hated him the same way you hated anti?" a raised eyebrow, another smirk. "didn't you want to hurt him?"
"this is so fucked," aaron sobbed, clamping his hands over his ears as he groaned in disgust. "rhea, for fuck's sake, tell us what they're doing to him!"
she sighed. "they're extracting his magic." she said this in a tone so casual that it took a moment to sink in. "i didn't think they'd manage it, but this machine is new. it tears every strip of magic from your body and, depending how much of it was in you, you'll either literally shrivel up and die or you'll lose half your senses and maybe a limb or two."
aaron turned and threw up. jackie found himself at rhea's side, watching the skeletal man's chest rise and fall, wheezing. "is he dead?" jackie breathed, something hot and unpleasant stirring in his chest. "and - why are they taking his magic?"
"he's not dead, no," rhea said matter of factly, leaning against the dark machine. "not yet. and as for your second question - think of it this way. you know how you took part of anti's soul and therefore gained most of his magic and a bunch of his memories? it's like that, only slightly different. they don't take the soul. only the pure, unreached magic. they use it to fuel their own. so they won't gain this man's powers when they use it, but instead, their own magic will be stronger."
"this is so messed up," aaron moaned, straightening from the corner he'd been vomiting in. he was pale, shivering. "we can't - we can't do this. we can't."
"oh, come on!" rhea said loudly, throwing up her hands and letting then flop to her sides. "you helped torture anti, did you not? he's human too, probably! human like this guy! both of them pricks, correct? both of them people who have hurt one or more of your brothers? why is it so wrong for anti to hurt and not him?"
even jackie didn't have an answer. not only that, but… there was a small, disgusted part of him that was almost satisfied to see raymond like this.
he wondered what marvin would say if he could see him now.
"this isn't important right now," aaron suddenly spat. he stormed towards them and grabbed jackie's hand, holding it tightly in his own. "are we going to get these bloody necklaces or what? let's go, i'm tired of fucking standing here."
both rhea and jackie were surprised by aaron's sudden change of heart, but neither one complained. they checked that the coast was clear and set off again, clicking the door behind them. jackie didn't look back at raymond.
"blake's corridor is over here," rhea said, guiding them through a hall and briefly throwing up a veiled illusion to hide them from someone walking by. jackie held his breath until they were gone. "the stiùiriche always gets a corridor to themself, lucky bastard. mckenzie, this is your time to shine. hopefully we can get in and out without too much trouble, but if not…" she cracked her neck. "blake is mine."
the hallway was dark, and no one was around. "he doesn't like people being around," rhea said quietly. their footsteps were the only sound they could hear. "back when he was announced as the new stiùiriche, even i wasn't usually allowed to - shit!"
she grabbed them and pulled them against the wall. on the staircase, seen through the window across the opposing room, staring right at them… was a man. short brown hair, pale skin, a black hoodie. jackie recognized him. fuck, but jackie recognized him.
is someone up above trying to fuck with me today? he thought. what the hell is going on?
"shouldn't we move?" aaron said. "he's seen us!"
"too late," rhea murmured. "way too late."
the man watched them.
"will he tell the stiùiriche?" jackie asked, heart racing.
"most likely," rhea replied.
aaron leaped forward, holding up his hands with a look of confusion on his face. "am i missing something? who is that?"
"unimportant," rhea said immediately. "let's go. if he's over there, blake probably is too. hopefully we'll be ok."
she took off down the hall. aaron fell into step beside jackie, shaking his arm to get his attention. "jackson. are you hiding something from me?"
guilt rolled in his chest. "shut up," he mumbled, hating himself as he said it. "i'll tell you later."
he did not plan to tell him later.
aaron let go of his hand.
"is this it?" rhea asked. they'd gone through another few rooms, seeing no one, and was now in what looked like some sort of strange dressing room, lit up yellow, lined with shelves and full of closets and desks. "or are we near it? you guys are so lucky i know the spell words to get into blake's places, by the way, otherwise you'd so be screwed. this place is fucking weird."
"we're close," aaron muttered. he'd been very quiet since seeing the man on the stairs. he moved across the room, opening closets and peeking inside. "i found this place when i left a meeting with the stiùiriche and went looking through some of the rooms while the spells were down for me. i was a rather well trusted member, and the magician who was to escort me out basically told me to go by myself. normally, i wouldn't have taken anything, but something seemed to be almost… compelling me. and i guess i'm glad i did." he paused in his search, expression unreadable. "maybe."
a few minutes of looking, and it was rhea who found what they were looking for in one of the many closets in the room. "blake's hidden safe," she breathed, staring into a black void with no apparent end. "i never knew where it was. he never let me in here. mckenzie, you legend!"
aaron just snorted, looking distant. "yeah, sure. let's go in and get the shit and then go home and be powerful, i guess." his tone was dripping with sarcasm.
jackie went in after rhea, staring in awe round the place. it was a literal abyss, with only a few glowing lights, like beacons. "your brother sure has a thing for creepy voids," jackie joked, trying to lighten the mood.
rhea wasn't paying attention. she marched across the floor - jackie blinked behind his glasses, because it looked like she was floating - and went up to the farthest beacon, eyes wide. "here," she gasped, beckoning jackie over. "quick, come here!"
it was the necklaces, laying on two white pedestals under glowing lights from an unknown source. they looked a lot like jackie's necklace, only slightly different colours; while jackie's was jet black, one was a deep silver with a red gem and the other was a golden copper with a green gem. "souls," rhea murmured, picking up the golden one and turning it over in her hands. "weapons. i wonder if they work the same as yours, jackie? mckenzie, come and - mckenzie?"
they both turned. aaron was gone.
"well, that's not good," rhea said lightly.
"shit," jackie hissed. he grabbed the other necklace, wincing at how it burned his hands, and darted back over to where the glowing entrance of the safe was. his feet didn't make a sound as he ran. "we got what we needed, let's find aaron and go."
"aw, do we have to?" rhea complained. she was fixing the necklace to her neck, letting it fall to her chest. "he's boring, can we leave him? he's probably off being emo because you wouldn't tell him who that other guy that you handed over to blake was."
"shut up!" jackie spat, stumbling out of the cupboard. panic was beginning to spike in his chest, and was it just his imagination, or were the lights flickering? "this was too easy, this was - this was a mistake. this was so a mistake, oh my god -"
"oh, yes. it was definitely a mistake."
that last voice wasn't rhea's. or aaron's.
jackie turned to face the stiùiriche himself.
he looked the same as last time he'd seen him. salt and pepper hair, galaxy suit that shifted as he walked, black cape, black eyes. he carried an aura of power and of demanding respect, head high and eyes blazing. already jackie was sinking, submitting to the pure magic the man radiated.
but then rhea stepped in. "blake," she said curtly, a polite grin on her face that only thinly disguised her malice. "how have you been?"
the stiùiriche glared down at them, arching an eyebrow. "stealing from me again, sister," he said, and he was looking at the necklaces in both their hands. "haven't you taken enough?"
rhea scoffed, her mask of indifference slipping. "mm, have i? i can think of a few more things i could strip you of. your position of power, your heart, your -"
jackie suddenly found himself swimming out the haze of near magic hypnotism that he'd been under, immediately beginning to shout. "where's aaron?" he cried, swaying on his feet. "what have you done with him?"
the stiùiriche frowned. "aaron mckenzie? the traitor man, the one who stole from me the first time? he is here too?"
"don't play dumb!" jackie roared, and before he could even think, his eyes and veins were blackening and the necklace was tightening on his chest. "give him back to me!"
then a hand was on his shoulder, pushing him back down when he hadn't even realized he was rising. "stop," rhea said sharply. "he's mine."
the lights in the room snapped off and plunged them into darkness.
when they turned back on… they weren't really back on. they were in another black void, like they always seemed to be with this guy. "is this one of your magic specialties?" jackie spat, leaning against rhea to keep her close. "weird black rooms?"
"pocket universes," he heard blake say, his voice echoing all around. "my specialty, yes, next to my… natural charm. hypnotism. i'm very good at it, jackieboy man, wouldn't you agree?"
"i -" he tried to direct a bolt of magic towards him, but the void seemed to swallow it up, and he couldn't even seem to pinpoint the stiùiriche's voice. "shut up! just shut up! stop it!"
"don't let him get to you," rhea shouted. she pressed her back to his, and the two of them briefly were one, spinning round, on defense, watching. "he uses emotion to his advantage. use your light! you're a photokinesis magician, are you not?"
jackie breathed in sharply, whimpering in sudden pain. "i am, i am, but - i - since the necklace, i -"
something began to laugh. "oh, that is rich," came the voice of the stiùiriche, and a sudden wave of magic hit the two of them, causing rhea to stumble and jackie to fall to the floor. "your light magic - it isn't compatible with the black soul magic that you stole, is it? the irony. the irony!"
"shut the fu͠cķ ͠u͞p̶!"̴ jackie screamed, and his magic began to thunder through his veins. rhea howled, and she was a wolf, she was an owl, she was a beast. something glowed - the stiùiriche's suit - and he hit them again. jackie, for a moment, couldn't move. he could barely see rhea, lashing out with coils of weak darkness, and blake, laughing, laughing.
"your illusions don't work on me, piuthar," the man said loudly, and jackie's vision spun. black inky shadows seeped from his eyes and nose and ears and in between his fingernails, and he attempted to use it to push himself to his feet. it worked, and he stumbled, looking frantically for rhea as blake rose, never staying in one place. "i see right through you. always have. how goes your quest to redeem yourself, rhea bird?"
"don't you dare," she hissed in the voice of a snake. something collided with flesh. something burned. "i have redeemed myself plenty without you. i have many powerful magicians under my control, wrapped around my little finger. you have no idea."
jackie did not know what she was talking about. he shot a bolt towards the dire direction of the man's voice, and seemed to get a lucky shot. the stiùiriche screamed, and something blew into jackie's face as he swayed, trying to get to rhea. "fuck," he moaned, feeling his body go light. "rhea, aaron, m-marvin… marvin…"
"where's your fucking boyfriend?" rhea cried, and jackie saw her leap aside, something dark coiled in her hands. "he was our attack dog, the bastard! this necklace isn't doing shit!"
jackie was going numb. his stomach lurched, head spinning with hypnotism, stronger than anti's own. fuck, he wished he knew how to control all this magic better. he was starting to become delirious. "marvin!" he yelled, voice breaking. "i can't - aaron, marvin!"
"jackson!"
aaron's voice. through jackie's blurred vision, he could see him in the broken doorway that hadn't been open a moment before. "come on!" he shouted, holding the doorway and straining as blake attempted to close it from where he was standing. "hurry up, i can't hold it!"
"traitor!" the stiùiriche screamed. rhea took this opportunity to roundhouse kick him right across the face. without even the use of magic, blake stumbled; the closing of the door paused, and jackie even within his delirious state knew to race over to the exit. "you traitor, pathetic boy! you could have had power!"
once again, jackie had no fucking clue what he was talking about. it seemed like he was feeling like that a lot lately. all he knew was that if he didn't get out, he'd be trapped in blake's pocket hell world, and that wasn't something he wanted. "rhea!" he called, feeling his legs beginning to give out beneath him. "come on, we've got what we need!"
the doorway was bright, and aaron's face felt even brighter. "thank fuck you're alright, hurry up!" he gasped, ushering jackie out the void. as soon as he was back in blake's strange dressing room - how many pocket universes did he have in these closets, because he was coming out of a different one than before - his mind began to clear, and fuck if it wasn't unnerving. had he really been hypnotized so easily, just by being in blake's presence? how was he still that weak, after everything?
"run, run, hurry!" aaron was shouting, and jackie snapped back to attention as the man grabbed his hand and pulled him out the room back into the hall. he could hear fighting behind them, something crashing, something exploding, something slamming into something else, someone screaming.
jackie tried to stop. "rhea, we need to wait for rhea!" he yelled over the noise. an alarm was blaring - rhea had mentioned that if they were caught, there was a chance an alarm could be set off. someone ahead was shouting - pounding footsteps, magic blasts - "stop, aaron, we have to make sure rhea's ok!"
"fuck rhea!" aaron panted. three other magicians materialized in front of them. fire glowed in one of their hands, and jackie and aaron stopped dead. "shit, shit -"
one of them lifted a hand, chanting something -
and jackie threw himself into aaron's arms, wrapping his arms around him as the sound of static filled the air louder and louder like a broken crescendo -
and they were in the trees next to the waterworks again.
they held each other for about thirty seconds, neither man daring to breathe, shaking, listening to each other's heartbeats in the silence.
"you teleported," aaron said, his voice very high. "you glitched, you did it, we're out, you -"
"where were you?" jackie whispered. he was too scared to pull away, too scared to let aaron see the look on his face. too scared to look at aaron's face. "where did you go? you left us, i was - aaron, i was…"
aaron pressed his lips to jackie's head, holding him upright with a hand on his back. "had to do something," he mumbled, something jackie couldn't understand in his voice. "i'm sorry. i'm sorry."
an awful feel began to sink in jackie's chest. "aaron. if you did what i think you did… i think rhea will genuinely kill you."
"then let's leave her," he said loudly, and sat straight up, eyes wide and desperate. "i have the necklace, which i really didn't need, but i have it. thank you for getting it for me, by the way." he took it from jackie's hands, admiring the unnatural silver shine. "we… we can go. we don't need her."
jackie pulled away so he could look at aaron's face, though he kept his arms round him just to keep him grounded. "you - what? we can't leave rhea, what the hell? why would we do that?"
aaron hesitated. "jackson. she's - she's fucked, she's with her brother. there's nothing else we can do, babe, we have to -"
"oh, planning on leaving me, were you?"
the two of them whipped round to see that yes, it was rhea emerging from the trees. she must have gotten out through the hidden portal in the closet again. her hair was singed, her nose bleeding and scratched, but she was very much undoubtedly alive. "rhea," jackie breathed, and without thinking, he broke free from aaron and ran over to give her a hug. she didn't return it. "rhea, what happened, i thought you were -"
"dead?" she laughed. something in her voice was harsh and cold. she didn't appear to find it funny at all. "nope. just got a bit caught up. nice to see you waited for me, though."
jackie winced, stepping back between aaron and rhea. "i - i wanted to, rhea, but some magicians were closing in and i ended up teleporting -"
"what's your excuse?" she suddenly said, turning to aaron. the mood in the air soured even further, the tension thick enough to be suffocating. "why did you leave?"
aaron, to his credit, didn't break as she stared him down. he stood tall, unblinking. something unspoken traveled between them. a threat. a promise.
jackie couldn't stand it. "let's not do this," he said quickly, raising his hands to act as a shield between them. "we can talk later. we need to get away in case the stiùiriche follows us or something. come on."
for a moment, neither aaron nor rhea moved. then the woman smiled, snakelike. "ok then. let's go. we can talk about all this later, yeah? we've got all the time in the world."
jackie didn't like the threat in her voice. but he had no choice but to follow her out of the trees and back to anti's old waterworks.
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papa-nikki-writes · 4 years
Text
Rowvember day 10- Belief
Definition
1. An acceptance that something exists or is true, especially one without proof.
2. Trust, faith, or confidence in (someone or something).
Summary
After getting back from the hospital turned Charnel-house, Johnny starts hearing the Saints talking. Apparently The Boss had been very, very busy while he was laid out. Wrangling with the beliefs he held before he got taken out, he decides he needs to talk to Boss herself to make sense of it.
Words: 2, 248
“So Julius was the one that blew Boss up.”
“Wasn’t he Boss’ Boss?”
“Yeah, decided to take her out.”
“Is that why she burned down the church?”
“No that was coz of Dex.”
“Dex wants to kill her now?! Who needs friends right?
Johnny stood, frozen at the top of the stairs, hand gripping the banister tight, his knuckles turning white as his head span, and Johnny didn’t know if it was from what he’d just heard or whether he was still suffering from the after-effects of being out for so long. He blinked and shook his head, heaving his bad leg into movement. Laying flat on his back had left it stiff and painful, another thing to add to his already sour mood. Shea hadn’t mentioned any of this at the hospital, was she even gonna tell him? He was the second in command, he’d have thought she’d known he’d like to be bothered with things like this.
        He grimaced as he felt pain knife up both his leg and his side and he doubled over, clutching at both his newest and his oldest war wound, white spotting in his vision. It passed soon enough, and Johnny could hear the Saints speak again.
“I wonder why she let Troy live though?” one mused, and Johnny looked up, his blood boiling. She had a chance at Troy and didn’t take it? Had he wormed his way out of his mess again?
“Yeah you’d have thought she’d want rid of the chief of police-”
“Oi dickhead, do you have any idea how hard they woulda came down on us if she busted Troy Bradshaw?! Boss did the right thing.”
“Well I thought she was scared of nothing and no man.” one huffed, and Johnny’s boiling blood continued to simmer as he dragged himself down the stairs, great, now people were questioning her. Fantastic.
“Only an idiot fears nothing Josh, you should be glad, since we’re following her.”
“I was supposed to be following a badass Ryan.” Josh replied, and Johnny had him in his sights, yeah she might have let Troy go but that didn’t make her any less of the badass she was. Ryan noticed Johnny approaching them, his face turning pale as he tried to communicate to Josh to shut up. However Josh did not shut up. “Y’hear all these stories of a tough motherfucker, killed Victor fucking Rodriguez, fought for two hours after a shot to the chest, three shots to the shoulder in the siege of Prawn court and still kept comin’-?”
“I can tell you right fuckin’ now that the stories are all true, I was there.” Johnny snarled, and Josh turned in his seat and froze.
“I-I-I-” he stammered and Johnny raised an eyebrow,
“Now if you have complaints about how she’s leadin;, fine, but you tell it to her face, not do-whatever the fuck this is. Can’t criticise her lack of balls when yours seem to have shrivelled entirely.” he said, waving a hand, and Josh made to speak, his voice coming out in a squeak before he coughed.
“She let Bradshaw go.”
“And she’ll have her reasons, I just woke up and I know this,” Johnny explained as though the man was five,
“I was just talking-”
“Then talk, but my previous statement still stands- you-” he said to Ryan instead, “Where did she get to?”
“She took Pierce to help her clear out some of the last Samedi.” Ryan said, taking a drink from his beer before lowering it, “You won’t have heard man- The General’s dead, the Samedi are done.”he added, and his face split into a grin. “First gang down! Isn’t that great?!”
       Yeah it was downright fantastic, one of the main lieutenants of the Ronin down along with The Samedi in a matter of weeks? Shea was really tearing the city apart.
“Someone’s been busy.” he mused, though when he had woken in the hospital, and looked across to see Shea knocked out at his bedside, he’d seen it, how tired she looked even when she ‘rested’. He wondered if she’d even slept outside of just picking somewhere to collapse.
“It’s damn good to see you back though Gat, you had us worried for a bit.”
“It’s damn good to be back.” he nodded, and he meant it-which surprised him, not one to miss out on when dirt needed doing after all but he hadn’t processed everythin just yet, and finding all this out second hand knocked him for six. Was he, Shea and E’esh the only real things in that whole fucking gang back then?
       It felt real at the time, his faith in Julius was unshakeable at the beginning, but when Lin was murdered and Shea almost along with her, when he was taken by the Vice Kings and he only sent an injured Shea in against Tony Green? He began to question if the man could have it all handled when he was holed up in the Church all day. He wondered if Julius was slowly breaking under the pressure, but to be the one to blow up that boat and destroy everything they’d all been fighting for in one swoop?
     He couldn’t forgive that, would never. It wasn’t all Julius’ fault, not for everything, but he certainly set the chain of events in motion that led them here, with E’esh dead and his guts threatening to spill out of his body at any moment, it was hard not to hate him.
       Voices brought his attention to the top of the stairs, a group of voices laughing, Pierce, Shea and Tobias, well that was a nice surprise. They all stopped on the stairs when they realised that Johnny was stood there, Tobias’ face not breaking into any kind of emotion as he said.
“Gat! Good to see you man!” in that weird monotone voice that, as quiet as it was still carried to where he stood, and Johnny nodded in acknowledgement with a smile.
“Likewise, been keeping well?”
“Yeah,” he answered, raising his arms and stretching, “Had restless trigger fingers, you know how it is.” he said as he walked over and hugged him, clapping him on the back, his tone pointed. “Now you need anythin’, you let me and Laura know.” he said, and Johnny’s heart wrenched as he remembered Aisha wasn’t on this Earth anymore. He still refused to believe it, couldn’t believe it.
“Thanks.” he said, tone clipped, he didn’t mean for it to sound cold, but Tobias didn’t seem to take any offence from it. Tobias moved away for Pierce to come forward and grasp Johnny’s hand before clapping him on the back too, nodding in respect, and Johnny nodded back before turning to Shea.
“I need to talk to you.” he said in a low voice, and she tilted her head to one side, eyes sweeping him for a moment before she nodded.
“I thought you might.” she answered, her face and tone serious, so she knew exactly what it was about, “office is free, or we could go back to the room I put you in?”
“Whatever.” he shrugged, and Shea nodded, swallowing hard before turning to Pierce and Tobias. “I’ll be back, just gotta take care of business.”
“It’s cool Boss, we got you both.” Pierce replied, and Shea smiled slightly before turning to Johnny and beckoning him to follow her, he did so, and he found she was heading back upstairs, it was alright with him. He had to get used to moving sometime. He followed her into the room and no sooner had he sat on the bed and she had shut the door that she whirled round.
“You need to take it easy.” she said.
“I feel fine.”
“You passed out while we were being shot at and you passed out again when I got you in the helicoptor, please pace yourself, you are not at a hundred percent yet.”
“Well that makes two of us don’t it? I’ve heard about everythin’ you’ve done since I got laid out, the church Shea? Julius? Dex? Troy? The Samedi, you’ve been a one woman fuckin’ wreckin’ ball!”
“Shit.” she replied, rubbing her eyes before placing her hands on her hips, “That’s why I wanted to be here when you woke up,” she shook her head and looked at him, “It should always have come from me, I’m sorry.”
Johnny sighed and shook his head, making her feel bad wasn’t his intention for this conversation.
“It’s...not your fault, it’s fully fucked my head up, fuck knows how you’re dealin’.” Johnny clutched at his head and shook again, like his brain was an etcher-sketch he had to clear, and she shrugged.
“I drank a lot and shot a lot more people.” she said, so plainly Johnny chuckled despite himself, despite the subject matter.
“Ay, we sure know how to pick ‘em, don’t we?” he said, and Shea, again smiled a small smile.
“I really thought we did something back then.” she said, wistful as she stepped forwards and sat next to him, hands clasped in her lap as she stared at the walls, and he reached behind her and rubbed her back before folding his arms, sighing.
“Me too.”
“And I thought you’d be mad.” she said, looking round at him, and he raised an eyebrow. At first, on hearing that Troy got away, yeah he was mad, but now that he was sat here, saw her face to face, he couldn’t be. He’d lost one of his girls, he wasn’t going to spend his time being mad at the other when she was trying her best.
“I’m not mad at you.” he replied, shaking his head, “you had to go out and handle business, and you did. Can’t expect more of you than that.”
“Thanks man.” she smiled, then promptly looked down at the floor, smiling, and he found it both endearing and hilarious that she she still looked for his approval, in his mind she had surpassed the need for it years ago.
“So uh-why did you burn the church down?” he asked, and her head shot up.
“To piss off and keep Ultor busy of course.” she smirked, before her face fell and she leaned forward on her lap, “we need some room to breathe and we can’t do that with Ultor on our arse.”
“So the Samedi-”
“Got absolutely fucking annihilated.” she replied, “if I was playing before, I’m not now. Too much is at stake and we lost too much already,” she shook her head, “I can’t do it. I can’t fuck about.”
“But then what about Troy? Why’d you let him go if you’re not fucking around?”
“Troy?” she asked with a sigh, “cards on the table Johnny I couldn’t do it, I just couldn’t. I heard the wiretaps, he didn’t know about the boat-and he kept me alive when everyone was telling him to pull the plug. He’s a liar but I honestly don’t think he’s an enemy.” she explained, and Johnny felt annoyance burn at the pit of his stomach, he didn’t agree with that particular decision, but he could respect it.
“Fine. If you vouch for him? Fine.” he said, and she leaned back, narrowing her eyes.
“Really?”
“I wouldn’t be followin’ you if I didn’t think your judgement was sound.” he said, and her eyes narrowed even further, “What?” he asked, “If it goes south, you’ll deal with it, I know you will.” he shrugged, and she nodded once.
“You bet.”
“Then I ain’t worried.” he replied, and that was that. She smiled and tapped him once on the shoulder as she got to her feet, crossing the room to the door, before she bit her lip, looking around at the walls before she took her hand off the door handle.
“I uh, took everything not nailed down from the house and put it in storage, when you feel up to it we can sort through what you want.” she said, and the change in his face must have registered, as she looked down at her feet, “I’m sorry if I was overstepping, I just didn’t want you to worry about anything when you should be healing.”
        There it was, the sinking feeling, the blood chilled in his veins as he once again had to be reminded that this was really, really it.
“It’s fine. Thank you.” he said, again hearing himself angrier than he’d meant, “you’re right. I don’t think I ever wanna go back there.” he added, and she nodded.
“If you need me, I’m about here 24/7 right now, I’m getting my new penthouse renovated in The Row and it’s gonna take a few months so-” she shrugged, “-just give me a shout.”
        He nodded and she left, and he was both grateful and anxious. He wanted to be on his own for a bit, to sort through...everything but his brain was telling him to keep everyone in sight at all times, it was stupid really, Boss was the toughest he’d known and Purgatory was safe. But still his mind kept asking what ifs and playing out the fight with Jyunichi in different horrifying ways, kept making him imagine the Ronin storming Purgatory and slaughtering everyone, and him with his side couldn’t do anything to stop it. It was maddening what his own brain was torturing him with. All he had now was the Saints, and nothing and nobody was gonna take that from him.
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Wednesday, 12 March 1840
5 35/’’
11 50/’’
Reaumur 10º on my table (our breakfast and washing and writing table – Our only one) at 6 1/4 a.m. Quite ready – Washed and at breakfast at 5 55/’’ – Not bit here tho’ abundance of the sort of beetle and another sort of little insect likish a small beetley (hard back) ant? Do these larger insects that the people never seem to disturb and that swarm on the walls, keep them free from insects of worse kind, bugs &c.? 
Just after breakfast Gross came in flippantly saying ‘a great misfortune’ – Beginning to enlarge upon breaking my St. P-[Petersburg] thermometer – This too bad – The loss too great – I never uttered ∴[therefore] his talking useless, and he wisely went away – A-[Ann] never uttered about it then or afterwards – Nor I – 
Gave a blue note (= 5/-) to the old woman of the house (the old mother?) – She very well satisfied – One of my old thin leather gloves missing – Must have fallen out of my fur glove in the Prince’s Kibitka last night – Seeking it (the glove) detained us a few minutes – The only thing I have lost since Norway – Domna lost her little sac with p.[pocket] handkerchief scissors pins and needles &c. &c. = 4/-? She said, on Sunday night at Kopanowskaya (vide bottom of p.[page] 70) – off from Soroglazinskaya at two minutes before 7 – Ha Волга, on the Volga – 
(станица Замиянооскя) at Zamianowskaya at 9 1/4, a poor and picturesque little fishing village – Unpainted board, little, cottage-like Station House but the best house in the village? We might have slept there – Neat little church – Had slept most of the way to here – Much snow in the river latterly – Fine morning – Not much wind – Have written all the above (in pencil in my note book) without glove on without my warm hand getting starved or even cold – Proof how much warmer it is today than yesterday – 
Wattled farm yards – Hay stacked on the tops of the sheds, but little to be seen now – 2 Calmuc tents in farm yards – Large iron cauldrons lying about – Using for boiling fish grease – An undulating desert of fine red sand all immediately around the village – On rising ground at a little distance there seems a roughness as if of some low shrubby vegetation – 
Off at 9 3/4 down again upon the Volga – The village lies along the sand bank close above the river – The right bank has sometime since lost its boldness (from Tzaritzine) – It is now little different from the sandy bank on the left side – Wherever a stick will grow, there is willow which fringes both banks more or less – Read Russian Grammar and sleep – Right bank low bare sand as last station – Left bank low but a line of wood – 
At 12 1/4 Lebajinskaya (the village and good church at some distance) – Station House – Lone house – Large unpainted-board Government Station House, the Imperial Eagle as usual in the pediment of the front end – Forlorn – Getting out of repair – A sort of fosse all round the house, to clear it of the surrounding sand, now 3 or 4 ft.[feet] higher than the bottom step of the 5 or 6 up to the ground floor – As if the sand avait envie de l’engloutir – Sauntered about on the bare sand hillocks while we changed horses – The very desert of the great Zahara – Fine red sand that must blow about terribly – Picked up some of the white prickly low stuff that every where covers the sand where and as much as anything does cover it hereabouts – They say there is pasturage at some distance – 
Off at 12 40/’’ at 1 25/’’ pass near under little village left bank – Is it not on an island? Our route yesterday and today has seemed very much au milieu du fleuve – At 1 50/’’ the Courier called attention to a man and boy going at a good rate on a huge camel – The 1st we had seen – The Prince’s (Prince Cerdebjab de Tumen) people, from near his garden – The large wooded island alongside us (left – a little distance) all belongs to him – In fact, he is Sovereign Prince of the Calmucks all along from here to Astrakhan – 
The camel female – À double bosse – When fat, each boss stands upright – Now that the animal is poor, and hard-worked, and has just had a young one, these bosses hang down like 2 thick flaps (perhaps 8 in.[inches] broad and 9 or 10 in.[inches] long?) when they stand upright said George the animal is four archines high – Now she is only 3 – I should guess her to stand now (to the top point of the shoulder) 6 ft.[feet] 6 in.[inches] English that is 19 1/2 hands high! I asked if she was one of their tallest – Yes! And certainly the one we saw a little while afterwards stood 2 or 3 hands lower – This man has 2 camels – Some have 20 – The laine George called it woolly hair, is cast every Spring and is worth 16 Rubles per pood – She herself is worth 100/- all this took us 12 minutes the long line of wood near (left) is an island belonging to the Prince – Gave the man a 20 Silver Kopek piece – He well pleased – The nose of the animal pierced thro’ the ligament above the nostrils and a smooth hair cord run thro’ to which the cord (rein) is tied, and by pulling this the animal lies down for the people to mount or dismount – She chewed her cud all the while – 
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A Kalmyk and his camel. (Image Source)
We had been about 7 or 8 minutes in our Kibitka again when Nikolai (the Courier) called our attention to a fishing party – We alighted again, and stood from 2 10/’’ to 3 5/’’ over the square hole in the ice intently watching the outdrag of the net – The draught of fishes – It reminded me of the N.[New] T.[Testament] the manner of this being probably much the same as in the time of our Saviour – The net seemed never ending – They had got some little of it hauled out when we arrived, and it certainly took 3/4 the time we were there before we came to the end – 
The mesh seemed about 1 1/2 in.[inch] square yet 2 moderate sized frogs and good sized prawn had not escaped – The net was a good deal torn yet there was a tolerable draught – Some hundreds of fish – Perhaps a tank of 2 cube yards would have held them  
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2 yards x 1 yard and 1 yard deep – There was one Poisson Blanc = 20 lbs.[pounds] at -/80 per lb.[pound] at Moscow might be had perhaps for 2/- here on the spot – This the most valuable because they salt this kind – There were 2 or 3 Sadocs nearly as large as the Poisson Blanc, or perhaps that would weigh said George 15 lbs.[pounds] and the Courier bought one (Sadoc) for us = 10 lbs.[pounds] and another sort of fish that George seemed to call something like Lyash – All the fish taken were of these 3 kinds – The latter not much valued – Our Sadok = 10 lbs.[pounds]) -/15 and the other fish was given? – There were about 30 men – Pay 25,000/- per annum for the right of fishing here – A certain extent of river – Could not learn how great – Water here about 2 archines deep and ice (said George) 1 a.[archino] thick – 
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Fishing on the Volga, near Astrakhan. (Image Source)
Off again at 3 5/’’ – At 3 50/60 at Dowinowskaya – Neat red-yellow painted board Station House at this end of village on our left – We had never stopped before having our Station on our left – It seemed as if we had got to the other side of the river – How is this – Neat white green roofed church – Village apparently small and not good – Merely a fishing village – 
Off again at 4 1/4 – At 5 1/4, left, near, island of willows and a few Calmuck tents among them – By and by pass close left a line of Calmucks sitting on their hams on the ice, each (5 or 6 yards apart) at a little round hole not a foot in diameter (perhaps 8 in.[inches] diameter) fishing – Great breadth of river – Perfectly flat, sandy banks – The Cathedral seen at some distance and a church or 2 far in the distance ahead as if the Town or another Town extended far down the river – 
We seemed to come within the precincts as it were of Astrakhan at 5 3/4 and at 6 1/4 we stopped at the address given us by our Postmaster at Jenotaiewsk – Full! Drove on and inquired at 2 or 3 places – No Inn – Not a lodging to be had – What to be done – Sent to the Chef de Police – Very civil – Came and offered us his house for the night – Accepted with reconnaissance – He spoke a little French – Thankful – 
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Astrakhan seen from the Volga in the late 19th century.
At 7 1/4, having waited an hour in the street and fallen 1/2 asleep, chez lui – A good salon and large anteroom – In clover – But long in getting tea – I lay on the sofa – Our fish (non Sadok) was to be boiled – But as it turned out the Cuisinier was out – There was no fire, no anything – And I had completely finished tea and lay some time on the bedstead they had brought before the fish came after 10 – A-[Ann] had waited for it – I tasted and then went on eating – Excellent – Never tasted such fish – Fresh – Fat – Full of roe – Well boiled – It was A-‘s[Ann’s] thought to keep it for breakfast – Had Domna at 10 50/’’ – Fine day –
[in the side of the page:]      thermometer broken
[in the side of the page:]      on the Volga all today –
[in the side of the page:]      Camel
[in the side of the page:]      Fishing on the Volga
[in the side of the page:]      Station on our left
Page References: SH:7/ML/E/24/0043 and SH:7/ML/E/24/0044
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asarahworld-writes · 4 years
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A ZOMBIES Christmas
Chapter 3
Traffic had cleared by the time they were back at the Wells household.  As Dale pulled into the driveway, Zed noticed there were cars lined up down the street.  They were the last to arrive, then.
Just before they stepped through the door, he pulled Addison aside.  “Are you sure you want to do this?”  He lightly ran his hand through her hair as she nodded.
“We got this.”
We.  Zed grinned.  “Now I know the real reason you invited me over today – the incredibly gorgeous zombie boyfriend will distract them from the fact you’ve taken your wig off. All part of my quick wit and charming smile,” he winked.
Addison giggled, lightly digging into Zed’s side.  “Of course.  You’ve literally figured out my grand scheme.”  She held her hand out.  Zed clasped it firmly as they entered the Wells’ Christmas dinner.
Although they had meant it as a joke, Zed’s appearance did cause a stir among the family. Missy and Dale had known he was coming, but they had apparently neglected to mention that to everybody else. Bucky gave him a look that was a cross between annoyance and disbelief, a mild reaction comparatively.  Their grandmother screamed when she saw him, but her husband was surprisingly calm.  Mr. Buchanan, Sr. may have lost an ear during the Zombie epidemic, but Zed suspected that he had lost most of his eyesight in his old age.
“Hello, everybody, my name is Zed Necrodopolis, and I am Addison’s,” he had been about to say boyfriend, but the word didn’t seem to encapsulate the depth of their feelings, “date.”
“Ned Zeropolis? And how do you know our little Addy, Mr. Ned?”  Mr. Buchanan, Sr. asked loudly.
Addison stifled a giggle.  “He’s a bit deaf,” she explained, unnecessarily.
“She’s a cheerleader, and I’m on the football team.”  Zed winked at Addison, remembering how he’d used the line when he’d met the Mayor and Patrol Chief for the first time, who shook her head and covered her small grin.  Mr. Buchanan, Sr., still not recognizing Zed as a zombie, continued to question him about the football season.
Soon, Addison was recruited into the kitchen to help bring dinner to the dining room table. Zed started to get up to help her, but Addison pushed him back onto the couch.  “My mom and aunt have this weird tradition that we do all the preparation and table setting stuff and that the guys clear up afterwards.  Grandad’s pretty into football.  In fact, I’ve been told that that’s one of the reasons he liked my dad.”
“Addison, I don’t think football would be a great topic of conversation.  In case you hadn’t noticed, he hasn’t exactly realized that I’m a zombie.”  Zed pulled Addison closer, so she was perched on the edge of the couch.
“Are you telling me that my strong, handsome fullback boyfriend is scared of an old man?” Addison teased, quiet enough so only Zed could hear her.
Zed groaned, nearly inaudibly.  “It sounds so much worse when you put it like that.”
“You could always hang with Bucky,” Addison grinned.  “But seriously, I gotta go help my mom.”  She squeezed his hand and left the living room.
It only took the Buchanan women ten minutes to serve Christmas dinner.  For Zed, those ten minutes were filled with Mr. Buchanan asking questions about Addison and football, while receiving a series of odd looks from Bucky as he mindlessly answered with half-truths.  He was far more concerned what would happen if their grandfather realized that he was a zombie.
“Dinner’s ready,” Addison bounced back into the family room, automatically taking Zed’s hand. She gave him a look, eyes questioning, and Zed responded with a shrug.  Addison made a face, then led him into the dining room.  “Don’t worry, you’re next to me.”
Bucky was on Addison’s other side, and Zed was in the corner.  Her grandfather was at the opposite end of the table.  Addison plopped a scoop of mashed potatoes onto Zed’s plate, jolting his focus back to what was in front of him.  “More?”  Zed shrugged, and Addison rolled her eyes.  “Fine, but you’re not stealing my potatoes.  They’re literally the best – my uncle puts onions in them.”
Zed allowed Addison to finish filling his plate, then watched her to see what happened next. She stole his pickle.
Grinning at his girlfriend’s antics, Zed took a quick look around the table to see what everyone else was doing – they had already began eating – and dug into his own dinner. Addison had been right about the potatoes.
Dinner was a quiet affair, sharply contrasting with the quickfire of questions Mr. Buchanan had asked earlier.  With everyone consumed by their dinner, Addison was the only one to notice that Zed was eating with his left hand.
“Your wrist isn’t hurting again, is it?”  She leaned in, whispering.
Zed frowned, pulling his jacket sleeve down to conceal his Z-band.  “No, it’s good,” he said lowly, picking his fork back up and taking another bite of potatoes.  Obviously, everybody in the room knew that he was a zombie.  If all the football talk hadn’t given it away, the green hair and grayed skin was a sure sign.  So why did he still feel the need to hide his Z-band?
Once everyone had had their fill, the table was quickly cleared.  Dishes were washed and left to dry on the counter, leftovers were packaged into labelled Tupperware, and mugs were brought out as the kettle began to boil.  The family broke off into groups and clusters, the room filled with laughter and various conversations.
Addison was the youngest of all her cousins.  Having grown up away from Seabrook, they had only heard snippets about the resident Zombie population, though they were all well-informed about the town’s cheer stats. They ribbed on Bucky’s decision to cut his entire team just before the competition and watched as the zombies joined the cheer squad at the last championship.  Perhaps because of her position as the baby of the family, nobody was very concerned about the loss of her wig.  If they were, they kept it well hidden and focused instead on cheer and football.
Both of Addison’s other cousins had played football during their high school years and were continuing with the sport through college.  As long as the subject was football, Zed was able to maintain a solid rapport with them.  Dessert was served casually, with people keeping to their small group conversations. Addison brought herself and Zed a large slice of chocolate-gingerbread cheesecake and some eggnog, much to the indignation of her cousins, who wanted to know where theirs was.  Addison had rolled her eyes and pointed to the kitchen as she curled up on the couch next to her boyfriend.
———————————————————————————————————
Anyone catch the mashed potatoes joke/reference?  Z1 promo video – Zombie Brain Food Challenge!  Basically, they were taste testing gelatine food and Meg (incorrectly) guessed mashed potatoes.  Milo stole the point by tasting and correctly guessing onion.
For those who haven’t picked up on it yet, this fic takes place after Z2 summer but before the wolves show up.  Based on the pacing of that movie, to me anyway, it looks like they skip over the fall semester and jump straight into the new year.  There’s no football, which is September/October season, and the big dance is the Prawn, which is wordplay on prom, and prom is usually at the end of the year.
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authorellenmint · 5 years
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New Chapter With Duke Rutherford -- I really need a damn title if this is going to keep going.
First Chapters
Second Chapter
Third Chapter
An inhuman groan peels from Cullen’s lips as he lowers his weary body into the steaming water. The old tin tub clangs as his backside sinks to the bottom, more water slopping over the side than he anticipated. Too many days trapped in his office and not enough in the field.
“Sir,” a lone voice calls from the sitting room to his sleeping chambers. “Do you think you will require my assistance?”
Sighing, Cullen tips his head back and says, “No James. I believe I can handle a bath.”
“I’m needed down at the southern wing of the estate, but if you think...”
“For god’s sake, Jim. I’m a grown man. I do not need to be coddled like a babe.” Cullen spits, weary of the constant groveling. He winces at his tone even if the anger feels right.
“Very good, Sir.” Only the sound of the door closing answers after that curt dismissal. No doubt the lower stairs would be gossiping about their brute of a Duke for that one.
Bunching his knees up, Cullen drags his head down below the soapy surface. Just before his face slips under the water, he pulls in a breath to embrace his submersion. The other officers had hazed him something awful when he appeared on deck, green as the algae. A true sailor, a man worthy of the salt, could hold his breath for at least four minutes underwater. Cullen trained his lungs every chance he could, even as he was expected to remain dry on deck. He never could last longer than three minutes before aching for air.
Concussions rattle around him, the explosions dampened by the water swarming around him. His tries to keep his eyes closed, salt already crusting over his lashes, when a hand pushes against his back. Cullen’s eyes open upon a lagoon of blood swirling like wet fog from the mass of bodies tumbling to the sea.
Gasping, he sits up fast in the bath, the jangled memories seeping off his body like nightmares come dawn. Some nights he turns to find it is his brother’s or father’s dismembered hand pressing against his back. Others, it’s the same nameless limb as from the Atlantic. The ghosts will not cease haunting him, the man entrusted to their care, the one who lost the battle but won the war. The dead care little if their sacrifice was warranted.
With both hands, Cullen massages across his temples, trying to worry away the unending cloud. To think, the day had begun rather delightfully. Caroline invited him a bowl on her lawn. He’d adored the game as a child, and often won quite a few tournaments as he aged. At first, it was relaxing to fall back to the familiar, Caroline directing him to the proper manners of the day, guiding him to who mattered and who was on the outs. For a time, he felt all of 17 again, uncertain about this nobility curse placed upon his head, but trusting that he’d somehow figure it out.
Then his knee twisted on a throw, the ball careening so wildly off course it looked more of a cannonball aiming to take out a leg. Cullen kept himself upright; a Duke rolling upon the ground in pain was undignified after all. But the reality crashed hard around him. He wasn’t a spotty youth savoring time in the sun, he was a broken man tricked by fate into the life he tried to run from. All his efforts to try and prove himself beyond the family title and all he got was a game leg and the same yoke as before.
Reaching for the end table, Cullen uncorks one of the medicine bottles. The stench reminds him of horses, not the animal itself, but something in the care needed to keeping them going. He’s not certain what’s in it, only that the doctor’s told him to rub it into his knee every other day for the pain.
Funny, he thinks to himself while loading up his palms and slathering the herbal oil over his knee. If he were a horse, they’d have put him down for such an injury. The musket ball wobbles under his skin as he rubs. It’d been trapped too dip for the doctors to remove before, but somehow in the year hence it moved. He often finds himself pressing against the ball, wringing it through a small pocket under his skin. While there is pain for such a move, it is nominal, and the feel oddly centers him while he sits in dull meetings.
No doubt a doctor would shout him stupid for such a folly, and be right to do it too. He should tend to himself, he is the last remaining head of the household now.
Cullen snarls at the thought and grows tired of the pruning around his fingers and toes. Grabbing both hands to the sides of the tub, he begins to rise -- when a searing pain pierces from his knee down the length of his calf. He crumbles to the water, his backside bounding against the bottom while curling over in agony. Water gurgles into his gaping mouth, but he barely notices, spraying it back out as he crumples deeper to try and wick away the pain.
“James? Hello?” His pride crumbles as Cullen realizes that he cannot escape the bath alone. “Is anyone out there?” Only crickets respond to the Duke’s command. Delightful. How else could he be humiliated today?
“Hello?”
No. No, no, it cannot be...
The door doesn’t open, but he hears her body press tighter to it as she asks, “My Lord, do you require assistance?”
The Governess is the only person near enough to hear him. “No!” he cries, his body blushing at the thought of her having to haul him from the briny depths. Of her delicate fingers swept over his arms, her shoulders providing a crutch below his helpless body.
“As you say,” she says, clearly put off by his dismissal.
“Wait,” he speaks, wounded by his own barbed tongue. Wait how? How can she possibly be of assistance? “I am...I require assistance,” Cullen admits, his face cringing at the thought. “I am trapped in the...bathtub.”
“Oh? Oh...” her eagerness to help slams into a wall as she realizes what that means.
“Perhaps you can fetch the Steward, or another man wandering the halls to...” he begins when the door swings open. On instinct, Cullen pulls his naked body deeper into the tub in order to disguise as much as he can. Lady Trevelyan walks in with her hands extended outward and a handkerchief knotted over her eyes.
When she bumps into a table, she leans to the right and gasps, “Can you guide me towards you? I’m not certain where I’m heading.”
“Forward,” he squeaks realizing that the woman is dead set on helping him. Which means she will have to touch him. The flush burns to a crisp across his entire body, Cullen boiling like a prawn in his own soup. “A little more closer,” his lips fumble as the woman glides into his bedchambers. She may not be able to see anything, but the fact she’s even willing to risk so much to help him is...confounding.
Her fingers slide first against the lip of the tub, then cup the back of his naked shoulder. As she gets a grip on his skin, her touch warm and gentle, she says, “Could you put my hands where you need them?”
The trust is nearly insurmountable, Cullen wondering what she’d do if he turns out to be a cad. But, as he wants to be free of this unending nightmare, he pulls her hand around to the other side of his shoulders. “Dip down, please,” he orders, his own wet hand gripping to her pretty dress. He had never noticed before how well it frames her chest or that the color harmonizes with her deep green eyes mercifully hidden behind her blindfold.
“Lift,” Cullen commands, both of them straining as he puts half of his weight on his undamaged leg, and the rest upon her. But she does not speak a word against it, Miss Trevelyan waiting patiently for her next step. Standing on one leg, Cullen stares out over the floor he must cross. Stepping over the tub requires him to slide her hand lower.
Mother Mary, forgive me for this. Wrapping his hand over the top of hers, Cullen pulls her hands down until it rests at the start of his waist. He pushes her fingers in, trying to tell her that she will have to grip against him no matter how much it might disgust her. But the Governess seems unsurprised. “Ready?” she whispers, and Cullen counts down. Once one is reached, her strength transfers to her arm and the pair haul him clean out of the tub and to the floor.
Quickly, he hobbles towards his bed and the long nightgown he knows can hide his shame. Even as the pair limp together in a childish three-legged race, he feels the flush pooling in his loins and growing more turgid with each step. That is not helping!
At the bed, he lunges free of the Governess, snatching up towels to envelope around his hips. All the while she remains poised, her hands cupped to her stomach as if she didn’t mind having to carry him. Cullen snarls to himself, “Foolish, impotent, having to be helped from the tub as if I am some child or the elderly.”
His fussing freezes when he feels her delicate fingertips glance against his back. They press to the linen he threw across him, but with his body yet wet it sticks tight. “We all have bad days, my Lord. It is not wrong to need help every now and again.”
“I...” he turns to the woman who trudged into his bedchambers even knowing he was without clothing all to help him. If any knew, if any heard of this, she could never escape such a scandal. Yet she didn’t even hesitate. Tipping his head down, Cullen confesses, “Thank you. I don’t know what I would have done without your help.”
“Pickles, most likely,” she says with a laugh bringing a smile to him as well. “Do you require anything else?”
“No, no, I’m...good evening, Miss Trevelyan.”
“To you as well,” she says with a bob of her head. Turning on a dime, she exits his bedchambers with her hands extended outward for guidance.
Unable to handle the shame of his bungle, Cullen avoids the Governess and all bodies of water for a day. Exhausted and weary, when he returns to his bedchambers, he’s shocked to find a rope attached to a pully system strung from his ceiling to the side of his empty tub.
“James?” he shouts to the Steward ordered to never leave his side. “What’s this?”
“Ah, Miss Trevelyan’s idea.”
“She put this in?” Cullen marvels tugging on the rope. The pull is clean and sturdy, the wheels oiled to not even whine.
“Yes, she said it was to assist you should you ever need help,” James explains with his back straight. No doubt the servants gossiped like wet hens over their Duke’s latest escapade.
Cullen bends down to inspect the knots on the sandbag to counter his weight. Strong, unbreakable. A sailor’s knot. “Miss Trevelyan, is she...?” he begins, before shaking the foolish thought off. Women weren’t sailors. And James stares in anticipation of a command. Blushing, Cullen finishes, “Thank her for me, and please reimburse her for her work designing this.”
“Of course, my Lord,” James says while bowing to take his leave.
“Miss Trevelyan,” Cullen whispers to himself, “you are an ocean of surprises.”
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00qad snacking headcanons
for 007 fest’s food day / july 2, 2019
-danny can go through three bags of haribo, 2 packets of walkers prawn crisps, and a tub of cookie dough ice cream in one sitting without quite realizing what he’s eaten. he loves plain old candy. fun kid treats. he wasn’t able to afford bulk purchases of these things before, but now he can, and he even has a proper pantry in the kitchen to stock everything. he has a kitchen! he’s just a happy boy. he deserves all the good things. and danny will never food shame anyone because he knows fuel and nutrition can come in so many different forms. 
-then there’s alex, who will eat anything if it’s leafy or crunchy and green. he likes his snacks raw and fresh, to keep his mind sharp between heavier hot meals. like danny, he can be a bit extreme, but they’ve both got personalities to match. alex takes time to prepare his snacks - sliced carrots, sliced pears, sliced radishes, sliced beets, chickpeas and tahini in the food processor, oven-baked kale chips... he likes the quiet time to think. and of course everyone in the house ends up stealing his food, because who’s got the patience to wash everything and cut it up? thanks for feeding everyone alex! 
-james feeds everyone too, because he’s the family chef. but because he spends so much time putting together substantial, satisfying, sophisticated meals in the kitchen, he’s not really a snacker. he never had the luxury, really. he’s never had a life where he sits on the couch with netflix and a costco-sized bag of tortilla chips. that’s just not james (but q and danny hope it will be when he retires soon, and puts on 30 lbs). between meals, james is a drinker. and boy can he hold his liquor.
-q is a biscuits and tea man, and eats little else besides the sit-down meals that james makes for the household. he doesn’t have time to snack and thus doesn’t consider it really, but biscuits and tea keep him going at work, and they are things that can be found in any kitchen cabinet in any office in all of london. tea and biscuits last for months. unlike his 00s, q’s snacks are basically non-perishables. 
BONUS:
-turing loves eating boiled eggs with his fav human, alex. 
-pampuria licks all of james’ scrambled eggs and bacon soon as he puts the plate down.
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The aroma of boiling prawn and crab was not what Jarrod expected as he approached the abandoned shack in the middle of the Lakes of Liurnia. White smoke from behind it signaled him to a fire, which should be tended to by another. He slowed Sue to a trot as they got closer, guiding her around to the back end of the house, where indeed a flame was being tended to by a man wearing an iron mask of a prisoner.
“Pard’n,” Jarrod spoke, keeping a respectful distance. “Y’ wouldn’ve met a young girl with blonde hair an’ braided loops, would y’?” The question was rhetorical; this man was likely the only one who was here, and the space looked well lived. “Th’ young lady claims t’ve lost a necklace. If y’ve got it still, we’ll talk.”
He really hoped the man was amenable to diplomacy. He was not in the mood to cross blades.
@boilprawnshack
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wakeuphealthy · 6 years
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11 Women Who Hate To Cook Share Their Go-To Weeknight Meals
To discover the hack-packed, low-lift recipes that keep the cooking-averse satisfied, we asked millennial women who hate to cook to share their go-to weeknight meals. Ahead, you'll find our favorite responses. These meals could inspire even those who enjoy cooking because, let's face it, we all have nights when we don't have the energy to spend too much time in the kitchen.
Spinach, sausage, mushroom, white bean sauté
Occupation: Writer  Age: 41  City: Portland
Why do you like this meal? It's easy to prep, has a quick cook time, and contains solid protein and veg.
What is the recipe for this meal? 1 pound bulk chicken sausage 1 can cannelini beans 1 cup fresh spinach, coarsely chopped 1 cup mushrooms, diced 1/2 cup onion, diced 2+ cloves of garlic, diced Crumble and brown chicken sausage in pan, along with onions and garlic. Add spinach and mushrooms and cook until al dente. Add beans and spices to taste. Simmer for 10 minutes before serving.
Where did this recipe come from? It's a quick recipe my ex (a chef) threw together.
Pimped-out Top Ramen
Occupation: Social media specialist in digital marketing Age: 29     City: Los Angeles, CA
Why do you like this meal? It's always good and you add whatever you have in your fridge.
What is the recipe for this meal? Top Ramen Packet (shrimp, chicken, or really any flavor), a teaspoon of butter, cheese (sliced preferably), salt, pepper, green onion, Sriracha, spam (if you have it), seaweed flakes or seaweed, and an egg.
Where did this recipe come from? My grandma would always add an egg to my top ramen when I was a kid, and all the other additions have been from whatever I had in the kitchen. Butter was a tip from Kylie Jenner. Cheese is my newest addition and it's sooooo good. It makes it creamy.
Rice, tofu, and veggies
Occupation: Graduate student    Age: 22      City: Bethlehem, PA
Why do you like this meal? It's easy, quick, vegan, and healthy.
What is the recipe for this meal? Frozen steam bags of any vegetables (I usually use peas, corn, carrots, green beans, and mix them together in a bigger bowl) Frozen steam bag of brown rice (take as much as needed of rice and veggies for one meal and save the rest in the fridge) Firm tofu, sliced into small squares, seasoned with black pepper and nutritional yeast Mix a serving of rice, tofu, and veggies together in a bowl Flax and sesame seeds sprinkled on top
Where did this recipe come from? It's my own creation.
"Poor Man's Dirty Rice"
Occupation: Librarian    Age: 23     City: Boise, ID
Why do you like this meal? It's super quick, simple, and really flexible.
What is the recipe for this meal? Cauliflower rice, ground meat, and salsa. I usually use two bags of rice and cook those in a pan. In a separate pan, I will cook some ground meat — usually turkey or beef, but it can be anything. Then, when both are cooked, I mix them in a pan and add a few tablespoons of salsa, a little salt and pepper, and maybe some garlic powder.
Where did this recipe come from? It's a family recipe.
Scrambled eggs and veggies with cheese
Occupation: Journalist    Age: 22      City: Davenport, IA
Why do you like this meal? It's super cheap and reasonably healthy, especially since I go so heavy on the veggies. I'm trying to limit my meat intake and most of my attempts to meal prep vegetables have ranged from mediocre to sad, so I also appreciate that it's fast enough to make fresh each time.
What is the recipe for this meal? Two eggs, whatever chopped vegetables you wants (I like kale and tomatoes, a Brussels sprouts slaw I buy pre-cut, or even butternut squash), fresh (or not) herbs, and cheese. If the vegetables are hard, cook those first, otherwise scramble the eggs and add the vegetables at the same time. Add the herbs or any other greens and cheese toward the end. Lately, I've been using smoked cheddar with parsley or Brie and rosemary. I usually try to have an equal amount of vegetables and eggs, but the texture is definitely better with more egg than roughage. I'll add toast or an extra egg if I'm especially hungry.
Where did this recipe come from? It's really just scrambled eggs.
Cilantro-lime rice with chicken apple sausage
Occupation: Graduate student     Age: 23     City: Orange County, CA
Why do you like this meal? Super easy and lasts for about three days.
What is the recipe for this meal? Cook cilantro lime rice packet from target, cook chicken apple sausage, then mix together!
Where did this recipe come from? I came up with it through sheer desperation of something easy and lots of time roaming around Target.
Soy chorizo burrito
Occupation: Graphic designer    Age: 22    City: Washington, D.C.
Why do you like this meal? It's packed full of protein, is quick to make, can be eaten warm or cool, is easy to store for later or meal prep, and contains simple ingredients.
What is the recipe for this meal? Half a link of soy chorizo (from Trader Joe's), 1 egg, 1 flour tortilla, 1 cup of mashed avocado, olive oil, hot sauce for taste (I prefer the Mexican Valentina brand).
Where did this recipe come from? My boyfriend is Costa Rican, and he makes burritos that are to die for. Since I don't eat a lot of meat, this is an adaptation from what he makes.
Spaghetti with a green salad
Occupation: Temporary receptionist   Age: 25  City: Vancouver, British Columbia
Why do you like this meal? It is relatively easy to make and there is enough pasta for at least two other meals.
What is the recipe for this meal? Boil water; start cooking extra lean ground beef until completely brown; add dry pasta to boiling water and cook for 8 minutes, occasionally stirring; add tomato sauce to the cooked ground beef. When the pasta is al dente, you can drain the water and put the pasta in a strainer. Prepare a green salad to go with the spaghetti dinner.
Where did this recipe come from? It is a family recipe but I am sure there are many online recipes for spaghetti.
Rice and chicken with sauce
Occupation: Teacher   Age: 28    City: Dallas, TX
Why do you like this meal? It's incredibly easy to make, balanced, and fast. Almost every part can be store bought, so the only thing left to do is heat it up.
What is the recipe for this meal? There are several options for the rice. I'm Korean, so I like a sticky rice. There are companies who sell a microwaveable bowl of rice - that's the easiest way. You can also, of course, just make rice (easy, but time-consuming). Two cups of water per one cup of rice.
The chicken can either be mixed in with the rice or eaten separately. Take some diced chicken (whenever I buy chicken I dice it and separate it into different Ziploc bags, so they're easy to freeze and thaw as needed) and put them in a pan. Optional: before putting them in a frying pan, cover with flour. This will make them crispy. I put flour in a bowl and toss the chicken around in it. I'm sure you could add egg and whatnot, but this is the easiest way. Once that's done, I heat up some oil in a frying pan and then add in the chicken (if there's flour I try to use a little more oil so it can "fry").
Once the chicken is fully cooked, I add in store-bought General Tso sauce mixed with water, about a 1:1 ratio. Target carries several kinds of General Tso sauce, as does any other grocery store I've looked into. The Panda Express brand is one of my favorites. Once the sauce and water are in there, I swirl everything around to mix and let the sauce simmer. I wait until most of the water has evaporated and the sauce is thick. At this point, you can add in the rice. Add a little more sauce as desired and serve!
Where did this recipe come from? It mostly came from a love of Chinese takeout, rice, and easy dinners.
Mashed cauliflower and tofurkey Italian sausage
Occupation: International PR     Age: 26     City: Brooklyn, NY
Why do you like this meal? It's super easy, quick, and relatively healthy.
What is the recipe for this meal? Mashed Cauliflower: 2 Tablespoons of butter 1 bag of frozen riced cauliflower or medium head of cauliflower 1 cup water 2-3 cloves of garlic 1/2 teaspoon salt Pepper to taste Directions: Add butter and finely chopped garlic gloves in a 4 quart pot over medium-high heat and add cauliflower once the butter is almost melted. Sauté cauliflower for 3-5 minutes until it becomes a little lighter in color. Add in the water and bring to a boil. Once boiling, cover the pot and cook about 10 minutes. Reserve 1/8 of a cup of the cooking liquid and drain the remainder. Purée the cauliflower with food processor or hand blender.
Veggie Italian Tofurkey Sausage: Heat one link with olive oil over medium heat for about 10 minutes.
Where did this recipe come from? I adapted the mashed cauliflower from a couple of recipes.
Instant noodles with all the (some) trimmings
Occupation: Journalist    Age: 30    City: London, England
Why do you like this meal? It's balanced, tastes great, and ridiculously easy.
What is the recipe for this meal? Chop up some vegetables like peppers, broccoli, pak choi, Chinese leaf. Boil water on the stove, add vegetables and a protein like eggs, prawns, or chicken. Once the vegetables and protein are almost cooked, add a packet of quality, authentic instant noodles like Mama, Indomie or NongShim to the pot, with all their accompanying seasonings. Once everything has been cooked to your desired texture (I would recommend al dente noodles over soggy noodles), you're done. You can vary the proportions of noodles, vegetables, and protein according to your dietary needs.
Where did this recipe come from? I learned it from family
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/11-women-hate-cook-share-200500925.html
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jlf23tumble · 6 years
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1D Day, Hour Two
The file I’m watching on YouTube is much shorter than an hour (44 minutes!!), but that’s because the poster kindly removed the “VT” (shudder) from random countries (it always boils down to [insert country’s name’s] fans wilding, and there’s only so much of that I can take).
Still, hour 2 is fucking ICONIC for many reasons, the biggest being Harry’s barely constrained rage. Yes, Louis’s “done with it all” demeanor on 1D Day is (justifiably) legendary, but Harry’s right there with him (twin flames, y’all). I can’t tell if he’s coked up, genuinely angry, or just passive-aggressively petty because someone told him he had to speak more quickly, much more loudly, and with some enthusiasm, for chrissakes. Oh, he delivers, all right, so much maniacal shouting. Deets under the cut.
Hour 2 is all Lirry, and I, for one, love Lirry, so it’s 44 minutes well spent. Liam tells us, “We’re kicking it off with VT from  France, give it up for France!” (“FRANCAIS!” Harry yells), and after the missing bit of French VT, we’re back to Lirry, with Harry vacillating between murdering the French language (“Mercy boo coo to France”) and shouting “I ATE SNAILS” as his contribution to what they did in France last time they were there (Liam played football with some guys near the Eiffel Tower, fwiw).
The first guest is Dynamo (or, “DYNAMO, EVERYBODY” if you’re Harry), and he’s here for card tricks and more (“OH, SNAP” is Harry’s response to Dynamo nearly twisting his own finger off, and god, it’s horrifying). Harry’s fairly manic through the entirety of the card tricks, but I love Liam because he’s me in every card trick (“I’m glad mine’s easy to remember because I’d probably forget,” which is true of any card you take, like, ever???):
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“WHO LOVES MAGIC!” Harry shouts, and there’s a needlessly complicated special interactive trick that gets introduced here, with Dynamo saying that he wrote a prediction on a piece of paper and sealed it in a box at the beginning of the day, so he needs to Harry to keep the key safe. Points if you correctly assumed that Harry will stuff that key right in next to his dick as a joke.
Because nobody rehearsed or prepared for this epic full-day live event, there are all kinds of problems with the cameras, and if you want a fun drinking game to get you hammered within 45 minutes, take a shot every time you see a variation of this (Liam looking vaguely concerned while Harry aggressively points at the sky or the camera while shouting):
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A horrifically bad segment that’s a poorly disguised advert for Google Hangouts (lmaoaoaoaooaoaoa) kicks off questions from all over the world (the audio is bad, none of the visuals syncs), but we get some iconic answers to deeply important questions, like, “If you were in the Hunger Games, who would  survive the longest?” Liam says he’d hide and then kill passersby (yikes), and Harry says he’s more of a lover than a fighter, so he’d hide in a tree until it all blew over. Liam: “Oh, yeah, you’re definitely more of a lover.” Harry: “Easy there, Piers Morgan.”
The next question is from a group of girls wearing Christmas sweaters, which annoys Harry because “it’s a whole month and two days early,” but I think his issues are bigger than jumping the gun on holidays (and honestly, the UK doesn’t have the twin buffers of T’day and H’ween, so you KNOW this is just part of his general rage). Anyway, they want to know what other careers these two would be involved with, sans the D, and because they’re five, Liam says spaceman and Harry says baker.
After a series of horrible glitches, the next question is about which superhero they’d be, and me as Harry, blowing a giant raspberry as he ponders this important question with the level of exhaustion he surely must feel, three years into this band/interview technique. Liam can read the room, so he picks this one up and says he’d be Kung-Fu Panda, which makes it easy for Harry to say Hong Kong Fuey (!!!) or Top Cat.
With that mess done, it’s time to “ROLL THE VT!” (according to Harry) for Switzerland, and because the producers here are nothing if not cliché lovers, that means tiny cowbells for Harry to play with when we come back. He quickly tires of this, throws the cowbells off stage, yells “WE NEED A CAMERA,” and walks straight into the call box with the overwhelmed girls from hour 1. These girls are still weeping, but Harry says, “Thank you for listening to the album, you’re getting kicked out, sorry,” in the flattest voice possible, so good cop Liam hurries over to ask the weeping girls which song they liked and usher in two new people.
“Happily” is debuted, but we don’t get to see it, boo, but we do get ushered over to a theater with some contest winners. Or as Harry says, “We’re here backstage to meet some fans who have won a chance to be here…SHUT UP…in our VIP cinema,” and then, “You’re crying…is that because I told you to shut up? I didn’t mean it.” Liam is there again to save the day, but there are lots of sound problems, so it’s hard to tell what’s happening, tbh.
Anyway, these fans get to ask some iconic questions, such as, “What would we find in your fridge?” which gives us this classic from Harry: “I DON’T LIVE ANYWHERE, SO NO FOOD,” as the audience says, “awwwwww” in the background.
There’s a question from a lady on the screen, saying that she’s in front of the X Factor studios, and she wants to know what they would change their audition song to, if they could go back in time, and because Harry’s well aware of his various stalkers, he says, “I saw her the other day at the X Factor studios, 100 percent” (fwiw, Harry would do “Wrecking Ball” with props, and Liam would do “Mirrors”).
The last question is what they would change if they could go back in time, and Liam says probably his older haircuts, and Harry says that one day in April (and he mentions April again later in the hour, so someone investigate), he had a dodgy breakfast burrito, so he’d probably change that (he also had a dodgy batch of prawns one time, too, but that’s a different story, and god, he’s an underrated comedian). The sound is for shit, but Liam doubts this, prompting Harry to scream, “DON’T JUDGE ME, LIAM, I’M TRYING MY BEST,” and whyyyyyy is he so on fire (and why do I love it so much):
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We get back to the studio with an inexplicably breathless Scott Mills (he says he ran…but from where, lmao) and do another spin to figure out who the official 1D account (????) will follow on twitter. Harry starts cheating before people start yelling at him to stop, which is a shame, really, just follow all of these poor bastards, honestly!
We don’t get to see the VT from Germany, but we do get to see Lirry bickering about camera problems and stolen lines, plus an exhaustive rundown of all the thrilling things to come, and I’m so thankful to the person who made this moment a Dua Lipa meme all those months ago:
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One of my favorite segments has a really awkward setup, but tl/dr/dw, Harry brags, “I’m a bit of a chef myself, and if I’m honest, Liam, I’m pretty damned good at it,” so we get a “ROLL VT!” and an aggressive finger point, both from Harry, and a silly but charming cook off with the tour chef, who seems like a lovely lady (p.s. look at how glorious his hair was under all those tablecloths…also, he’s chewing gum in a gross way, but this whole bit is worth watching in full):
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The cook off is genuinely funny and results in a beautiful pavlova from Sarah and a basic sandwich (with pickle and paprika) from Harry, judged by Mark Jarvis, Gemma Styles, and Lou Teasdale, all of whom Harry bribes. I’m more fascinated with this ring, and my head canon has it either saying ILY or JEN (both of which make me smile):
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With that bit over, we move on to more rapping of random tweets, and it’s embarrassing, so I won’t get into that. But the VT of Liam surfing is something special, not only because he looks so obviously happy while he’s doing it, but also because he says some very profound things in the interview around it: “I get followed a lot, so it’s quite nice to get out in the sea where nobody can follow you […] it’s so nice and peaceful […] it doesn’t matter what you look like, you can just have a good time, it’s a bit of an escape,” and ouchhhhhh, that’s some real talk.
We head back to the studio for a fashion segment with Louise someone; a handful of lucky fans in Sweden won a t-shirt design contest, and Lirry are gonna do some modeling. Louise is happy that Harry knows where Sweden is (Harry:  “I got a B in geography…might have been a C, can’t remember”), and some poor shlub working on this trainwreck in the shadow gets dragged out on camera because he’s wearing green jeans, but he’s not there for long (Harry: “GET OUT” *shove*). Louise describes the fashion show to come, and Harry says that he’s quite good at walking in straight lines, but Liam reminds him that he tends to fall over a lot on stage and that the tiny catwalk is actually pretty shiny (god bless Liam for being so responsible).
Luckily for all of us, professional model Cindy Crawford is there to help with some tips (she’s introduced as “IT’S ONLY BLOODY CINDY CRAWFORD” by Harry, and I die with Cindy’s “Hello, boys,” and Harry’s “Hello, Mrs. Crawford”…followed swiftly by Cindy’s, “Please don’t call me Mrs. Crawford”). There’s some sexi modeling, and even though he only wears two shirts to Harry’s three (*and* Harry gets down on the ground to pose), Liam wins, according to the Swedes. He requests a model  off with Cindy as his prize, and he’s surprisingly good?
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The last segment is with Dynamo, the magic man, and for some reason, Harry’s weirdly agro about his own shirt mic, like, unnecessarily so, ripping it off to speak with Dynamo before gently putting it back where it belongs. Maybe he’s just frustrated about how they have to use Google+ (lololololol) for a totally convoluted imaginary concert that ultimately doesn’t work (me as him, tbh). 
While Liam does tech support live on air (!!), Harry asks Dynamo to do some card tricks to stall for time after literally nobody says a word when he monotones, “We’re having a technical difficulty…does anybody know any jokes.” Harry pulls a card as directed, but then, for seemingly no reason, he suddenly starts yelling, “THIS ISN’T WORKING, SHALL WE SEE SOME HIGHLIGHTS? HIGHLIGHTS!!! ROLL HIGHLIGHTS [aggressive pointing]!!” and the highlights are truly awful, and I hope he’s enjoying his smoke break for hour 3, jfc.
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floggingink · 7 years
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Riverdale, “Chapter Nineteen: Death Proof”
Death Proof is a great movie. there’s one man in it and he gets Pussycatted at the end. Vanessa Ferlito gives a lap dance. Zoё Bell’s abs have a starring role
Jughead is a Serpent now, so it must follow that he’s taking care of Hotdog voluntarily
did he take the couch? Jug took the couch. he’s writing again, so he’s got his groove back via an emotional plateau/Toni
Betty hung up and was like, Shit. SHIT!
Nick has a knife for...protection? cocktail garnishes?
Mrs. St. Clair seems thrilled to meet Betty and then not at all surprised that Nick has charges brought against him, the ennui of the ruling class
Betty gets a free pass for her suspicious appearance at the apartment for just having been that much of a pain to Sheriff Keller by now
I liked Betty’s tone of disappointed confusion when she says “You didn’t kill him.”
I don’t like BH talking about “nakedness” in any context, no matter who he turns out to be
I want to say those are Veronica’s shimmery blue pajamas?
Penelope’s icy disregard reverts Cheryl back to calling her “mommy,” which I think is like Cheryl’s PR thing? Cheryl continues to be fascinating. she’s called Penelope “mother,” hasn’t she? it’s all about context. it’s all about context with Cheryl
Jughead eats: at breakfast with Jug, Toni daintily eats fruit out of a parfait cup, like Veronica
Toni’s uncle locks her out of his house, so there’s that. the Serpents don’t have somewhere for her to sleep?
Jughead was honestly about to be like “Last night was…[fun/amazing, similar],” because that’s what people do in Bridget Jones and he’s flying without a net here
Every triangle has three corners, every triangle has three sides: in a remarkable turn, Toni puts an end to the whole affair, because she has better things to do (girls), which is a stress off everyone’s shoulders
Jughead’s “not over Betty” because it was like six hours ago?
also props for the classic bad girl-bisexuality revelation. it doesn’t get badder (it’s GOOD). this is PRECISELY what I want but now I want optical proof
Betty is done with the BH’s “Simon Says”
The Blossom spawn: “the people” at “the Farm” (CAPITALIZED in the closed captioning!) will help Polly “disappear” for while? I’m gonna need a Farm episode pronto. what the HELL is THE FARM
Archie checks up on Betty in the morning and takes care of her of best he can, because this is a Good Archie episode. Good Archie wants to know why Betty hasn’t fixed it with Veronica yet. Good Archie never lets you walk alone. Good Archie stops you from walking into your ex’s brunch
Certified pedigree: the sheer SPREAD of personalities at Alice’s living room shaming. the mayor and the sheriff and their felon children. BOTH Lodges showed up. can Fred handle any more disappointment? Reggie has a parent?? what’s next!!!
Nick’s party was “bacchanalian,” so it’s probably best Alice only saw Jughead’s birthday party from across the yard
Mädchen Amick, MÄDCHEN AMICK: “Except for my Betty”
I’VE HAD SOME WINE LET’S GET THIS BITCH DONE
SUCCUBUS VERONICA IS GREAT VERONICA. ARCHIE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT A SUCCUBUS IS
I relate to Kevin because “HASHTAG BUGHEAD IS NO MORE?” is coincidentally what I woke up screaming two Thursdays ago
Hiram says “ACID QUEEN ALICE” because there’s something in Riverdale’s water that just gives you that kind of inspiration!!!! apparently he knows some shit about her too!!! everybody’s parents seem to “know” about Alice. she’s got a lot of attitude for someone whose secrets EVERYONE KNOWS
—just like Betty!
“The Southside is the source of all our problems.” HOW’S THAT, HIRAM? because your northside succubus children were the ones who tossed it back like green apple sugar powder in a Baby Bottle Pop
Archie’s 180 with “Not all Serpents are dealers” is the kind of whiplash Archie is capable of. he knows he fucking broke up with his boy. fucking fix it with Jughead you twit before he gets a bigger tattoo
The 2001 Josie and the Pussycats movie was a masterpiece: Josie was SO HOPING she would get out of there with plausible deniability!
Jughead is like NODDING ALONG with every word Mr. Phillips reads, waiting to be abandoned
I’m writing a scene where it’s gay.: JUG LEAVES THE INSTANT HE GETS A CAPSLOCK TEXT FROM THE BOY HE LOVES
he interrupts a totally warranted scolding from his beloved English teacher to PROBABLY get reamed again by Archie, but he CAN’T RESIST WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN
Archie coming to get Jughead is probably Archie’s “WHAT’S UP IS I SAW YOU, ARCHIE” moment. it’s not equivalent but rather proportional in that you know this is the best I could hope for from Archie, but also—I don’t want to shortchange him! he went to the scary school where everyone hates him, through the metal detectors (OR NOT!!!!!!), and stood dithering in the hallway until he saw his Jughead!!!!!!! HE CAME TO RESCUE JUGHEAD
this is a great example of Archie’s hands-on “justice,” which is sometimes more in quotes than other times, but he didn’t CALL Jughead, you know, he ran over there! fuck! FUCK! WHEN ARCHIE IS GOOD HE IS VERY VERY GOOD
Archie is like hauling him out by the fleece collar too, like Jug wants to get Toni, and Archie, his arms locked around Jughead’s waist, teenage boys scrambling
What damn high school in America: Sweet Pea punches the locker when he gets arrested, because of injustice
I think Veronica would have listened to Betty if Kevin had not interrupted!
“She’s not worth it” is way harsh, Tai, but Betty did seemingly attack her out of nowhere
anyway of course Betty answers the phone, because she’s stressed, down two friends, and doesn’t want to have done all that for no reason
the “Sugar Man”? the “Sugar Man”? SUGAR MAN
if one more person tells Jughead that the Serpents deal jingle-jangle, he’s going to absolutely blow a gasket
“Tall Boy wants to parley” is going to be a code sentence of mine for something. if we’re on the phone and it suddenly sounds like I’ve dropped it and you just hear “TALL BOY WANTS TO PARLEY!!!!,” the Winter Solider is there
Fifth period is AP English: Cheryl is sunbathing, in the shade, outside Thistle House reading Baudelaire because...it helps her feel calm…
Cheryl’s sheaths: I want to say those sick black sunglasses are Miu Mius
“Is there no memory, however traumatic, you won’t defile?” is an Alice-level read
oh, Fred would like to know how Jughead’s doing? ISN’T THAT NICE, YOU PRAWN
I’ve seen Brick like thirty times: Malachi’s House of the Dead is exactly what I wish I’d had the guts to make my dorm room look like, like all the cool lesbians’ rooms in the art majors’ dorm building, like the cellars of the Opéra Populaire but in the Strand
Gay?!: quick question: if Tall Boy weren’t here, would Malachi be fucking Jughead?
Cheryl had so seamlessly incorporated the Sugar Man into her emotional life as a first grader that she drew a family picture with him in it, like in Children of the Corn (her parents are two TINY stick figures in the background, it’s incredible)
is Sheriff Keller letting Betty have “one question” a red herring? asking for Jughead
the zoom in on Betty looking at Veronica and the cut to her audibly sipping on a milkshake is classic art
Veronica is right that Betty needs to “break up” with BH, but Betty’s Bettiness instead makes her want to “turn the tables on him”
HOW EASY WAS THIS CONVERSATION, BETTY. YOU COULD HAVE JUST TALKED TO THEM TWENTY-FOUR HOURS AGO
OH MY GOD! Jughead and Archie, together again, it’s been like THIRTY YEARS!!!!!
Archie knows why Jughead joined the Serpents, has learned some lessons maybe? (no)
the second god-blessed cut to Archie (in his letterman jacket) and Jughead (fleeced, his man-about-town look) with the prison phones to their ears
“SP-24601”: FP Jones played by Hugh Jackman would be a sight to behold
poor FP has lost everything except his honor and now he’s lost his SON. his hair is such a mess. he’s gotta SLAM THE PHONE
“Ghoulies dress like fops” is great
they drive hearses, like Claire Fisher
“RIVERDALE DRIFT”? Jughead did NOT watch that franchise? (Archie’s expression is fantastic)
FP’s like, I hate that you joined my gang, but now you’re going to break some laws for me
Penelope eats hard boiled eggs with toast soldiers
the Caravaggio reproduction I liked from the wake escaped the fire!
did Penelope know about the drugs? I thought she didn’t know but I guess just knew the Sugar Man was sketchy and avoided him for Legal Reasons
“I wouldn’t even go cruising here.”
Reggie DOES look good in the county’s blue vest
I hope the reason Betty’s avoiding talking to Jughead, LIKE ARCHIE KEEPS TELLING HER TO DO, is because it’s too important and she’s scared to see him
Veronica’s purple pumps
God bless jingle-jangle: Verne the JJ dealer is a cutie!
you know he’s a Ghoulie because he hand-stitched a leopard-print patch onto his studded sleeveless vest
Veronica was rich: $150 for two stix of the JJ??? this is how you know it’s the northside kids with the drug problems!
“Drugstore Cowboy”
Sexy, aesthetic Southside:  these angels hot glue the ends of the stripey jingle-jangle sticks, because it’s a family-owned business. I kind of love the Ghoulies? like I’d rather hang out at Malachi’s than the Whyte Wyrm from what I’ve seen so far, as long as I get my next tetanus shot first
Jughead calls Archie his “boy” to impress Malachi, Archie is wearing his Riverdale jacket probably without thinking about the political symbolism
I couldn’t believe Maggie Kiley had the audacity to stage the “Veronica/Betty?” “Archie/Jughead?” face-to-face, but she’s this season’s Lee Toland Krieger, she is an artist
Y’ALL REALLY GONNA TAKE JUGHEAD’S FIFTH HOME AWAY FROM HIM?
“SHARON”?????????
Cheryl’s red crop top and paisley trousers
“an unrepentant spore”
Penelope is Cheryl’s “cobra-like mother”
I swear Graham Phillips was darling on The Good Wife
Archie approached Reggie for the car and Betty approached Jughead about fixing it, and that’s that
Jughead consented to sulk next to her while she tuned it up, because he loves her but he’s mad
and it’s okay that he’s mad, for the record, because he’s been broken up with three times in two days
his voice cracks, preciously, when he’s like YEAH AND YOU BROKE UP WITH ME
I love how pissy and curt Jughead gets when he’s peeved. “You just called it a date.”
I’m curious about “You did the one thing that could hurt me.” EVERYTHING hurts Jughead
Betty’s in denim overalls and Jughead’s in a mechanic shirt for no reason except they’re next to cars
Cheryl is getting some grade-A maple syrup this episode! leveraging the St. Clairs’ check for dirt on the Sugar Man? GIRL
The female gaze: Veronica slept with Archie one last time because he literally might die today
aw, he’s proud of Veronica for her Ghoulie stunt
Hiram and Hermione are LITERALLY playing chess
OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY WHEN VERONICA SAID “HE TRIED TO DO IT TO ME,” EVERYONE IN THE ROOM WATCHING WITH ME WHEN HIRAM LOOKED UP WAS LIKE OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!! I’M TELLING YOU!!!!!
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Hiram is about to rip someone’s face off with his teeth and Hermione steps into frame and it rack focuses on her, GENIUS
These students are legally children: I want to say Tall Boy is the only adult at the race. the FP at Jughead’s party, if you will
Best costume bit: everyone of course looks fucking incredible at the race. the Ghoulies? slick and absurd dandies. Kevin’s powder blue bomber jacket? he’s not at Needle Park, and he’s cruising. Betty’s high-waisted post-WWII skinny Express trousers? she knows Jughead’s looking. Cheryl’s $1,000 leather jacket and Quentin Tarantino foot-fetish slingback? she knows I’m looking. and Jughead in all black? Jughead looks GREAT in leather. Betty, write this down
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Fwoopy hair is the best hair: Betty’s bandana and ponytail
Please protect Betty: Veronica and Archie get to make out, while Betty and Jughead have to make do with Betty telling him she can never stop loving him and to drive good
Jughead doubts it: Jughead’s “You’re an enigma, Cooper” is the second-greatest thing he has ever said to her, after “That was haunting, Betty.”
so Jughead can drive? Jughead can drive STICK?
Toni and Sweet Pea got out on 1) lack of evidence or 2) Penny Peabody threatening someone
Gay.: Toni got a face full of Cheryl and she’ll be back. Toni, save Cheryl from the evils of this world
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Cheryl’s a chaos angel from hell: Cheryl was ABSOLUTELY “born for this moment”
Sixth period is Intro to Film: I know this is Grease, and I can appreciate Jughead being the Danny Zuko of this moment, but I don’t want to forget the chicken run from Rebel Without a Cause, where Natalie Wood starts the race with only her elated sky-high jump and tiny 50’s waist
Jughead gives Cheryl a thumbs-up and Malachi makes the rock-and-roll index-and-pinky signal
Cheryl’s hair: God, the see-through scarf? her immaculate cutout shirt? her Jesus Christ Superstar heavenward arms? CHERYL WAS BORN FOR THIS MOMENT
I don’t think Jughead is shifting gears
BUT HE IS HAVING A GREAT TIME!
oh NOW you say “abort”
Archie > Dawson: TURNS OUT ARCHIE HAD A GREAT PLAN! WOWZERS
Jughead can drive very well, has very strong arms, and can run very fast. these things I didn’t know!
okay but the race is forfeit, right? buys them some time, maybe
Betty and Veronica watching Jughead go lite-ballistic from stress and Archie being like, Dude, dude, calm down, like something was not right with the world (Archie did a great job)
although Jughead is right that the power politics are complicated and everyone is in danger, although it was frankly that way before
I liked Archie using a chessboard analogue. Veronica is rubbing off on him
is Betty getting a ride home with Reggie? classic
“Careful you don’t get burned again.” ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Penelope’s left hand makes her so uncomfortable that she wears ONE leather glove
when one Sugar Man retires, another seamlessly takes his place, like the Dread Pirate Roberts
“Damn good coffee”: fucking correct me if I’m fucking wrong, but is that the nightmare painting hanging over the fucking fireplace?
Cheryl hands the check back over, because as you will remember Cheryl honors business deals, but Penelope decides to be “a mother”
Pop’s trademark blue purgatorial lighting bathes the girls in their plotting booth
The Blue & Gold is basically just Betty’s awesome blog at this point
her “Care to comment?” is WICKED though
Betty has resolved to find BH, which means he has about three episodes left. the Serpents should really start involving Betty in their maneuverings, as she is just as much a hereditary Serpent as Jughead and much more effectual 
50 Shades of Betty: SHE’S BREATHING DOWN HIS NECK AND SHE LOVES IT. this is her driving fast! they love danger!!!!!!
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was Mr. Phillips protecting Jughead by telling him to stay away from the drug world??? (I mean obviously he was, but because Phillips was an insider and liked Jughead and didn’t want to have to kill him) or did he just not want Mini Woodward and Bernstein on the case?
he and Jughead make the exact same sort of grimly resolved/horrified eye contact, respectively, as FP and Jughead when FP got arrested last season
Toni TOTALLY knows this shattered something of Jughead’s Southside foundation. look at her little smile
Archie thinks his plan with the race backfired and he’s worried he’s losing Jughead, PUNKIN
Fred’s popping Chekhov’s Valiums, so he’s about to be addicted to drugs
I can’t even do it out here with the fucking Lodges sitting around their cream salon with Andre being like, the St. Clairs are dead or whatever, ma’am, and Hermione’s like, Thank you Andre, go get yourself something nice
Summer + Blair = Veronica: Veronica’s like, I HAVE HAD A STRESSFUL DAY AND IT MAKES ME FEEL POWERFUL
“CHECKMATE,” HIRAM? HIRAM, HAVE YOU MURDERED? DID YOU JUST MURDER?
Betty and Jughead I want to say are back together, but they did not kiss this episode, which means I have to start over with the tally marks on my wall
Betty’s reading The Silence of the Lambs, to better figure out what her game is going to be (Jughead had a copy)
Jughead looks over at her like, Damn. My girlfriend is fucking scary. I fucking love my girlfriend
SUGAR GETS GOT!!!!!!!! BODY COUNT OFFICIALLY TWO! he’s almost caught up to Hiram Lodge
NEXT WEEK: Sheriff Keller does me a solid and takes his shirt off
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