#where are these corpses and what is happening

[xaiquyn]

I'm bored, so answering all of them in one right here.

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

The entire cast of the Moomins (but especially Snufkin and Joxter)

lighter or matches?

Matches. I like the smell of them and I weirdly struggle with using a lighter.

do you leave the window open at night?

In summer when it's hot, yes. When it's cold? No.

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

I genuinely believe that ghosts could exist. Not saying they do exist, saying the could.

what color are your eyes?

Blue/green. It's hard to tell and seemingly changes with the lighting.

why did you do that?

What?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

Scrunchies are fun. :)

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

Five. All open, two empty.

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

Don't drink coffee. :/

would you slaughter the rich?

Yes. Let me maul the corpses of the rich.

favorite extracurricular activity?

Art of all sorts.

what kind of day is it?

In terms of weather? Cold. To the point where I skipped school to avoid frostbite. In terms of my mood? Weirdly contented. I feel properly at peace for the first time in a while.

when was the last time you ate?

'Bout five hours ago. (It's 20:00 rn)

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

ABSOLUTELY. One of, if not, my favourite smells. I love it with all my heart and I apparently taught my parents the word for that smell. (petrichor)

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

No.

can you drive?

Nope.

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

Genuinely don't know. Never cared to figure out what either of those would really entail.

what hair products do you use?

Like I pay attention to that.

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

No. Nail polish is the most vile smell on this horrid Earth filled with horrid smells.

do you say soda or pop?

Depends on which one whoever I'm speaking with says.

something you’ve kept since childhood?

This old plush I've had since I was a baby.

what type of person are you?

Introvert?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

Love it! That's my kind of weather. Even better is when there's a fog covering everything to the point of barely being visible. I like to go out into the woods near my house and pretend I'm a cryptid.

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

Stargazing.

perfume/body spray or lotion?

No?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

Having a girlfriend/boyfriend. Had to replay that one alot to figure out I'm aroace..

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

Last night? 'Bout four.

do you wear a mask?

Nope.

how do you like your shower water?

Lukewarm at the hottest. Cold if I'm in the mood for it.

is there dishes in your room?

Yep. There's a bowl I forgot about earlier today.

what type of music keeps you grounded?

Folksy-type music. Especially the type I get wanderlust from.

do you have a favorite towel?

No? Do some people?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

Christmas. I had a bit of a breakdown when it was like 19:00 or smth, the day was a bit overwhelming. And my dad noticed, and for the next two hours we drove around the town.

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

A lot! To name a few: Flight of the Crows by Jhariah, Suffering by Amélie Farren, Shut Eye by Stealing Sheep, and Constellations by The Oh Hellos to name a few.

what’s your timezone?

GMT-5 (I think)

how many times have you changed your url?

Once

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

Nobody.

a soap bar that smells good?

You think I pay attention to that? When showering, I'm not even mildly present. I am fully dissociating.

do you use lip balm?

Nope.

did you have any snacks today?

Most of the food I had today was snack, minus bacon.

how do you take your coffee?

I don't drink coffee.

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

Ao3.

what’s your take on spicy foods?

Love 'em.

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

My mother.

can you remember what happened yesterday?

Not much of it.

favorite holiday film?

Don't really watch Holiday films.

what was the last message you sent?

Me confirming to my overbearing mother that I was still alive at school on Monday.

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

Still underage.

can you skip rocks?

Yep.

can i tag you in random stuff?

PLEASE. I LOVE TO BE INCLUDED IN ANYTHING.

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[chuulyssa]

୨・──── ALL I WANT IS LOVE THAT LASTS, IS ALL I WANT TOO MUCH TO ASK ? ────・୧

link to part i

pairing ⸺ satoru gojo x reader

teaser ⸺ trying to mend your broken bond with gojo satoru becomes difficult at the entrance of a rival, a distinct memory from your past. torn between love that aches and love that heals, you are left to pick up the remnants of what could have been and lay to arrange what will be. choices hold the power to break or mend, and satoru meets your guarded heart that threatens to either tear you apart or weave you back together. will satoru be able to win you back in time — or will the scars of yesterday refuse to tie you to a love that was never meant to be?

content ⸺ fluff, mostly f!reader, heavy angst, misunderstandings, mutual pining, slowburn, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending, love triangle, shitty choices, implied abuse, jealousy, implied torture, implied slavery, mentions of grape, death, massacre, murder, royal!au, magic!au, historic!au

count ⸺ 22k + 2k

author’s note ⸺ so this marks the end of the series with gojo! watch out for ones with other characters <3 this came out way later than i had expected it to, oof. sorry to keep all of you waiting! for some reason tumblr is not letting me post the whole thing, so if you want to read what happens after 22k words, i’m leaving the ao3 and wattpad links as well.

🎧 ao3 wattpad

Three years had passed since that incident. You were now twenty years old, working a respectable job at Jujutsu High as a teacher. It was nice to utilize the knowledge you had gained back at the School of Royalty. Jujutsu High, as a school, was similar to the one you used to attend as a child, except the children here were far more humble.

You preferred this over anything else though. You wouldn’t want to spend the rest of your time around spoiled kids who had never heard the word ‘no’ in their lives.

It wasn’t necessarily the kids of the nobility that you despised, but rather the ideologies they carried with them. You still cringed remembering Kamo Alina babble about traditions “back at her kingdom”. Perhaps you had hatred against all noble clans, except your own, the Gojo clan, of course. The rest seemed too hollow and self-absorbed, and their kids seemed either too coddled or too burdened.

You were in charge of the first years at the school. You had few students, but they were all the best ones you could ask for: Maki Zenin, Toge Inumaki and Panda.

Maki was from the Zenin clan, whom you knew to be cunning and sly. She was very different from what the papers said about her lineage though — Maki had a knack for being good at fighting and war skills, whereas her clan was famous for running with their tails in between their legs from their opponents. You had caught the little girl staring at you more than once during your training sessions with Utahime. It was nice to have her watch; perhaps it was best that way for her to learn the things you did as well.

Toge was from the Inumaki clan, and used to speak in only food ingredients to not accidentally curse those around him. And finally, Panda was the ‘son’ of Principal Yaga, and a cursed corpse.

Here, you were glad you weren’t in charge of shaping heirs of stupid clans in a factory. Rather, you were to train and enhance those who were willing to learn. And in this humble, quiet school, you had found something even the nobility, who looked down upon the place as often as they could, could never offer to you: peace.

Things back at home… weren’t the best. Satoru was almost always away for ‘missions’ with Suguru, and it had been a long time since the two of you had even seen each other, let alone talk. You couldn’t recall the last time you both even sat together in the same room alone. He never told you where he was going, and you never asked — what was the point after all? He wouldn’t say even if you screamed at the top of your voice.

His mother had quite a few times tried to fix the situation between you two, but it never worked. Satoru had developed a strained relationship with his mother as well. After all, she had a hand in keeping the secret of your engagement from him, so how could he trust her again? Every time she tried to help, the gap between the entire family seemed to widen even more. It didn’t help that his father had stopped talking completely to his mother as well. There were rumours around the clan that the leaders were sleeping in separate rooms after that incident with the Kamo clan. You would have felt bad for her, if you didn’t feel worse for yourself.

Shoko had decided to pursue her medical education in a different kingdom. There was a void from where she had left, and although you were happy for her that she was able to live her dreams, the emptiness you felt whenever you reread your old letters made you feel sorry for yourself.

Utahime had been the only one to stay back with you. When you told her about your plans to teach at Jujutsu High, she immediately dropped her own things and joined the same school. You would often feel guilty for leading her to a different path than she had originally intended, but she would constantly reassure you that she would never have it any other way. At the school, the two of you would fool around with each other a lot, but the hollow space left by the old memories of the others would always nag at your brain the second you were by yourself.

Dinnertime at the table became a quiet affair. Oftentimes, while playing with the food on your plate, you missed the old banters between Satoru and his father. It almost felt like a distant memory from a whole other timeline, as if those little moments never happened at all. You usually ate your dinner alone in your room now, since it wasn’t worth coming all the way to the dining room anymore. Satoru’s father ate out every day, and his mother used to be the only one to eat at the table. If it weren’t for her, you wondered if you would be eating at all.

This night seemed like any other night when you had decided to eat at the table. Yet you couldn’t look up at your mother’s face and into her eyes. She looked paler than ever as if she was sick. Her eyes seemed hollow and dark, and if it weren’t for the tight grip she had on her chopsticks, you would have wondered if she had any strength in her left at all. After finishing your food quietly, you set your chopsticks down, and were about to stand up to bow and leave, when she stopped you.

“Stay,” she said this one word softly, and it took everything in you not to collapse in her arms at the sound of her weak voice. She didn’t look at you directly, but rather somewhere on the table, and she looked as if she was lost in thought, though you knew she had become this way ever since that night.

You sat back down, and stared at her as her grip on her chopsticks tightened ever so slightly. She opened a quivering lip to speak. “My son... my Satoru... He’s never been this upset… at me.”

You swallowed. He had never been this upset at you either. He had never been upset at all. You used to wonder if Satoru Gojo even had the word ‘upset’ in his dictionary. And now that was all you could see.

“I just hope…” she trembled slightly, “... that you can find it in your hearts to… to forgive me.” She looked up, and you looked away, for you knew the sight in front of you wouldn’t let you breathe another moment. You knew she was holding back tears. You were too.

“There is nothing to forgive,” you croaked out, hoping what you were saying was making sense. “I just wonder if this is worth going about if he isn’t happy with it.”

“It’s not, you’re right,” she murmured, looking back down to her plate. “I was a princess. I was told I could never be wrong. Yet here I am, hoping I am not, even though every cell of my body tells me I am.” Then she looked right into your eyes, and something in your heart broke again at her state. “Would you want to marry someone who was not him?”

You stopped. No. No, of course not. No, you would never, ever even dream of marrying someone that wasn’t him. But what could you do now? What could be done? If he did not want it, then how could you? How could you do something like this to him against his will? So slowly, you nodded. “Perhaps I could think about it. But not now.”

“I understand. Goodnight to you.”

“Goodnight, mother.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

“Good morning, Miss!”

“Good morning, Miss.”

“Salmon.”

“Yes, yes, good morning to all of you. Hurry up now, the first class starts in 15 minutes,” you said swiftly, waving at the kids. You turned to Utahime, who was staring at the parents dropping their kids off to catch some hot single dad she, or rather you, could have a chance with. “What class do you have first, Miss Transfiguration?”

“The annoying third-years,” she grumbled. “How about you, Miss Charms?”

“My first years. I’m charmed.”

“Sure, you are.”

You watched the carriage Maki had stepped out of. It was rather modest for someone of Zenin lineage. But what really caught Utahime’s attention wasn’t the car — it was the man who stepped out to escort Maki.

He was tall, with dyed blond hair that shimmered under the morning light, and striking brown eyes. Utahime froze.

“Wow.”

“What?”

“Wow. Is that… him?” she whispered, gripping your arm.

“Him?” you asked.

“The guy! From years ago!” she hissed as if that explained everything.

You raised an eyebrow, watching as the man exchanged a brief word with Maki before returning to his carriage. “Iori, you’re not making any sense.”

Utahime pulled out her wand and immediately began tapping it on her temple at a rapid pace. “Don’t you remember when those exchange students introduced themselves? In the hall? That cactus transfiguration kid? This is him. Look.”

A floating picture hovered in your hands. It was slightly blurry, moving up and down serenely, but you could make out the younger version of the man fixing his carriage in front of the school gates clearly. You blinked at the picture, then at Utahime.

“You… remember him enough to produce this complicated magic?” you asked, though you didn’t know whether to be amused or alarmed.

Utahime shrugged unapologetically. “You gotta do what you gotta do.”

You sighed, shaking your head in disbelief. “‘hime, you’re a stalker.”

She grinned, utterly unbothered. “A resourceful stalker, I’d say. Anyway, don’t you think he’s—”

“Don’t say it,” you warned, already seeing where this was going.

“—handsome?” she finished, her grin widening mischievously.

You groaned, covering your face. “Utahime, he’s Maki’s guardian. You make it sound like I’m ready to adopt her or something. That’s weird.”

She waved off your protest, nudging you playfully. “Come on, he’s single. Uh, probably. And if he’s not, well, that’s just unfortunate for him.”

“Why are we even talking about this?” you muttered.

“Because,” she said with mock seriousness, “you’ve been single for far too long, and this is an opportunity. So…” She leaned closer. “Why don’t you try flirting with him?”

You stared at her like she’d grown another head. “Preposterous. Absolutely not.”

“Why not?” she teased, clearly enjoying your discomfort.

You glanced at the man who was now pulling away in the carriage looking like a war hero, and then back at Utahime. “Because I don’t feel like dying today. You know, the Zenin clan and all of that?”

She laughed, throwing an arm around your shoulders as you both headed back inside. “Suit yourself, but just know — I’m rooting for you!”

“Utahime,” you sighed, “you’re impossible.”

But her laughter was infectious, and you couldn’t help it.

You smiled.

──── ୨ৎ ────

The staffroom was unusually quiet, save for the faint scratch of your quill against parchment as you graded the first-years’ essays. Utahime, however, was anything but quiet. She had perched herself on the edge of your desk, her hands gripping the back of your chair as she swung it gently back and forth.

“Flirt with him,” she said.

“No,” you replied flatly, not looking up from the parchment.

“Come on, just a little?” she coaxed, leaning over your shoulder and nearly smudging the ink you’d just scrawled across a particularly poor attempt at a levitation charm essay.

You leaned back slightly, giving her a deadpan look. “Utahime, I am trying to work.”

“And I am trying to help you!” she shot back, as if her nagging about your love life was an act of selfless charity.

You sighed, putting down the quill and crossing your arms. “For the last time, I am not flirting with Maki’s guardian. That’s weird.”

“It’s not weird. It’s romantic,” she argued, dragging out the last word like it was a persuasive spell. “You’re single. He’s single—”

“We don’t know that he’s single,” you interjected, but Utahime waved you off.

“Semantics,” she said. “The point is, he’s clearly into you. Did you not see the way he looked at you yesterday?”

“The reason he even looked at me was because you shoved me in front of him like a sacrificial lamb,” you retorted.

“Details,” she said breezily, now swiveling your chair side to side. “But seriously, what’s the harm in a little bit of flirting? He’s charming, dashing, hot, and you’re… uh, you…?”

“Wow, thanks,” you said dryly, though you couldn’t hide the small smile tugging at the corner of your lips.

She grinned. “See? You’re already warming up to the idea,” she leaned in close to your face.

The door swung open. There he was, the same man both of you had just been talking about. He took one look inside the room and raised an eyebrow. Your eyes widened, because of course, without any context it looked like you and Utahime were just about to kiss. You shrieked and pushed her away and she laughed at you, though she stopped when she saw the man judging her silently. Maki face-palmed behind the man.

“Excuse me if I am interrupting something intimate,” he looked at you. “We had an appointment regarding Maki’s performance, yes?”

“Ho ho ho! Yes you did!” Utahime giggled and left the room, and it seemed like she had taken all the comfort out of it too, leaving you, him and Maki standing in it, staring at each other awkwardly. Maki coughed loudly and excused herself, and you made a mental note to reduce some points on her essay.

You cleared your throat as he took a seat across from you. His presence seemed to shrink the staffroom. He leaned back in the chair as if he owned the room. You focused on the stack of papers in front of you, determined to act professional. In your mind, you could hear Utahime’s voice still echoing: Flirt with him!

He folded his hands on the desk and his gaze flickered briefly to the papers in your hands before locking onto your face.

“I have to ask,” he began casually. “Are you and that colleague of yours… together?”

You froze mid-flip of Maki’s report card, staring at him as if he’d just asked you to duel. “What?”

He leaned back slightly with a faint smirk. “You and that woman. The way you two were before. It crossed my mind that you might be…” He trailed off.

“I’m not— she’s— what? No!” you sputtered, feeling your cheeks burn.

“Ah,” he said softly, as if the weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulders. “Thank heavens. I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself if you were.”

You blinked. “Excuse me?”

His smirk softened into something more playful. “Well, I’d have had to rethink all my plans, for starters.”

“Plans?” you echoed, your voice coming out higher-pitched than you had intended it to be.

“Mhm,” he murmured, tilting his head slightly. “Plans like how to win your favour, of course. You can imagine how devastating it would’ve been to learn I stood no chance from the start.”

You could feel your brain short-circuiting. Was he flirting? Or was this just his sense of humor?

“I— uh— Maki!” you stammered, blurting out her name like it was a life saver. It technically was. “We’re supposed to be talking about Maki’s progress!”

“Of course,” he said smoothly. “Her progress is paramount. But forgive me — I’m a man of focus, and right now, my focus seems to have shifted.”

“Let’s have it shift back to Maki then,” you insisted.

He chuckled softly, leaning forward just enough to close the space between you ever so slightly. “As you wish. But if I may, just one more thing.”

You hesitated warily. “…What now?”

“You have the most fascinating reactions,” he said. “I could watch you get flustered all day.”

Your hands gripped the papers tightly, and you let out an exasperated sigh. “Mr Zenin, do you ever stop talking?”

His grin widened. “Not when I’m talking to someone this delightful. And it’s Naoya, to you, darling.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

For the school’s 107th anniversary, you and the other teachers had decided to plan a surprise event for the students, guardians and even the principal. But as you stared at the chairs lying askew everywhere, and the food stall looking like it had undergone a raid, you sighed. Who would have to clean everything up in the end? The teachers, of course.

You bent down to pick a random flask up from the ground, and you looked up to see Naoya standing at the entrance of the schoolgates. You watched as he shooed away the carriage with Maki and their driver in it, and walked towards you.

You got up quickly and panicked, eyes darting everywhere to see if he really was walking to you or not. Naoya stopped in front of you, and suddenly the flask in your hands seemed too heavy. You dropped it, but he caught the tin, lips curving into a smile at your surprise.

“Astonishing reflexes, hm?” You nodded at his words and he laughed. “That was quite the show, I believe. You handle large crowds really well.”

You half-laughed at the compliment, looking down at your shaking hands. Why were you so nervous?

“Yeah, well, the crowd has departed now, and this is the tough bit.”

“I can help,” he smiled at you, and you blinked in surprise.

“Ah, you don’t have to. Besides, we can’t make guardians work for us.”

“I insist.” He pulled the sleeves of his shirt up and put his hands on his hips. “Where are the inconveniences that have you so troubled? I shall fight them.”

You snickered a bit. His dramatic actions reminded you of someone.

A certain someone.

Maybe that’s why you liked his company.

You snapped out of your thoughts when you saw him staring at the upturned tables with dread. “Has there been a call of war here?”

“Close enough. The seller had mochis on his bill of fare.”

“That sums it up. But you can’t possibly expect me to dirty my hands with this. A nobleman shouldn’t be doing manual labor,” he shook his head and sighed.

You raised an eyebrow at that. “You’re the one who insisted on staying to help.”

Naoya grinned. “Well, I can’t leave my favorite teacher to fend for herself. Besides…” He picked up two chairs effortlessly with one hand, and turned around to see if you were still watching. “It’s a chance to show off.”

Maybe it won’t be as boring with him around after all.

You had found yourself in this lonely teahouse far more than you could admit for someone of your status. It usually buzzed with the chatter of lonely workers, gossiping seamstresses and little children. But it was better, far better than what was going on at home anyway. You stared at your chawan, and put your fingers around it to drink. But the vessel was hot, and you hissed as you withdrew your hand back, the tea inside seemingly hissing back menacingly.

“Careful, darling,” a voice said from behind you and you jumped. “I said, careful,” he taunted, rubbing the top of your head affectionately. You looked up to meet Naoya’s eyes, your own widening when you saw him.

“Naoya!”

“Fancy meeting you here. I didn’t think I’d find you in such a quaint little spot.”

“Me neither. Isn’t this place,” you waved around at the dull walls of the room, “below your usual standards, Mr Zenin?”

He crossed your table to pull out a chair in front of you and sat down. “I could say the same about you. Or perhaps,” he brushed his fingers on your lips to wipe the wetness of tea from earlier, “we were led here by fate.”

You choked on air at his action. “Fate? We’re just at a teahouse. It’s not exactly a meeting of the stars.”

Naoya grinned at your fluster, and leaned forward playfully. “Ah, but you see, fate works in mysterious ways. And right now, it’s working to bring me closer to the most captivating woman in the room.”

“Ha, ha,” you mumbled, staring into your vessel to avoid meeting his eyes. “You talk too much.”

He laughed softly. The server arrived with a platter of sweets, and bowed, “For the lovely couple.”

You spat the tea you had just sipped out. “We— we’re not—”

“Thank you, miss,” Naoya interrupted you swiftly, and nodded at the server, who immediately straightened up to take his leave.

You stared at him, aghast. “Naoya, we’re not—”

“Not yet, at least. But I’m not opposed to the idea. How about we take the first step?” He leaned in closer and planted a teasing kiss on your cheek.

Your jaw dropped — from embarrassment or at his audacity, you did not know. “What—?”

“There. Now we’re official.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

You clutched your bag tightly. Great, another rainy day. And you had refused the umbrella your maid had offered to you as well. Sighing, you looked at the sky. The downpour didn’t look like it was going to stop anytime soon. If only a miracle happened that would escort you back home safely.

“Stranded, are we?” Naoya’s voice broke through the rain. You turned to see him standing with a pristine black umbrella, grinning at you as if he was not surprised at all to meet you here.

“Yeah. You stayed back? Where’s Maki?”

“Oh, I left her to go home in the carriage,” he shifted the handle of his umbrella to one shoulder. “Need me?”

“I’ll manage,” you replied, not wanting to disturb him. Though part of you wondered whether he would be here if you hadn’t been stuck here as well.

“Let’s not ruin such a lovely sight with such a disaster. Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

“I’ll be fine, really. You don’t have to—”

“I insist. Or would you prefer I let you catch a cold? Then you’d have no choice but to rely on me to nurse you back to health.”

You groaned. “You’re impossible.” Realizing you had no way home without his help, you stood under his umbrella. He grinned at you, tilting the umbrella more towards you to shield you from the harsh rain.

“You’re getting wet,” you pointed out.

“It’s a small price to pay.” He glanced at you with a sly smile. “Don’t tell me you’re worried about me.”

“I’m not,” you scoff slightly.

“Good. I’d hate for you to think I’m fragile.”

The walk ahead was comfortable, although you didn’t think that was the case for Naoya. By the time you had reached the entrance of the clan, you could see Naoya’s sleeves were drenched. But he didn’t seem to mind at all. His eyes followed something ahead that you coulldn’t see through the fog that covered the atmosphere.

“Naoya? What are you looking at?” You asked, and he huffed in irritation — more so at the thing he had seen than at you.

He wrapped an arm around your waist and you involuntarily sucked your stomach in at it. He led you to the figure.

White hair… Lovely blue eyes…

Your fiance who refused to be yours.

Gojo Satoru.

He was leaning against a pillar with his arms crossed in front of him, staring at you two through his sunglasses as if he would rather be looking at anything else than at the fingers curling around your waist.

Naoya, much to your horror, approached Satoru with you still in his arms. “Greetings,” he said pleasantly. “We’ve met before, yes?”

“Yes,” Satoru replied coolly. Then he addressed you, though his eyes didn’t quite meet yours. “Who’s he?”

You started. Fuck. What was he to you? An acquaintance? The guardian of one of your students? An associate—?

“Her boyfriend,” Naoya stepped in before you could respond, and you watched Satoru’s eyes lose what little warmth they had earlier. He turned to you as if expecting you to deny the claim.

“What? I mean, I guess…? Maybe? But I’m not sure—”

Satoru arched an eyebrow, and let out a single syllable that made your heart break into pieces all over again. “Oh.” He looked at you with an expression you couldn’t understand at all. His lips were twitched, but he wasn’t happy. His eyebrows were furrowed, but he wasn’t confused. You felt like he was toying with your brain on purpose with all the failed hints his face gave.

Naoya grinned smugly. “Don’t worry, I’ll leave her in your care now, brother.” He was clearly enjoying himself.

Your eyes widened.

Look… I’ve never thought of you that way before, okay? You’re… you’re pretty, but you’re like a sister to me. That’s how I’ve always seen you.

Satoru’s eyes darkened, and he shoved his hands in his pockets, taking a step back. “Great. Fantastic,” he mocked you. “I’m so glad you’re being taken care of, my little sister.”

A few more minutes passed, though they were so awkward you did not have the courage to relive them. Naoya had left with a smirk and a wave, and Satoru had followed you inside the estate when all you wanted to do was get away from him.

“You’re… back, haha,” you mumbled, and he nodded. The rain patted against the windowsill softly, and each drop felt like it rained in your heart.

“Is he really your boyfriend?” He blurted out.

“Huh?” You were caught off guard. “Oh, um… I don’t know? He took me out for coffee once. Does that count?”

“No, absolutely not,” Satoru scoffed.

You paused. And then you let out a laugh. He stared at you and let out a bark of laughter as well.

“Him? Your boyfriend,” he wiped the tears off from his eyes. “The audacity!”

“Typical of him, I suppose,” you chortled.

“What did he even ask you for the coffee thing?”

“He said he wanted to talk about Maki’s essays,” you snickered, and he cackled.

“Essays?”

“Yeah!”

“You know, you should probably go on a real date sometime. Just so you can tell the difference between a parent-teacher conference and, y’know, an actual date,” he rolled his eyes.

“Oh, yeah? And who’s going to take me out on this ‘real date’? You?” You teased.

Satoru froze. He opened his mouth as if to respond, then quickly closed it, his gaze flickering away from you.

You felt the awkwardness returning from earlier. Forcing out a laugh, you waved your hand dismissively. “I’m kidding! Obviously. Haha. Anyway, I should, uh, go now. Busy day tomorrow and all that. So, um, goodnight!”

You practically bolted from the room, leaving Satoru standing there, staring at where you had just been. His hand twitched as if he wanted to stop you, but he stayed silent, his jaw tightening as he watched you retreat.

You locked your door, hoping you weren’t being wishful as always when you heard the faint murmur of his voice.

“Maybe I would.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

The next morning, you stepped out of your house, adjusting your bag of supplies on your shoulder. Rejecting your driver who had offered you a ride in the luxurious carriage, you walked on, greeting the little children of the various families of your clan. Crossing the gate of the main estate, you found Satoru leaning casually against a nearby carriage, waiting for something — or rather, someone. 

“Morning,” he said, grinning like he had been there for hours. His sunglasses reflected the surprise in your eyes under the morning light.

“Uh… good morning?” You blinked in surprise. “What are you doing here?”

He shrugged at you. “Thought you might need a ride.”

“Don’t you have work?” You asked sceptically. He had had missions and trips to be on all this time, so why was he here now?

He shrugged again, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Not yet. Free morning.”

“Oh,” you frowned at his excuse. “Well, I usually just walk to work. Sorry.”

“Ah, well, no problem then,” he straightened up, brushing imaginary dust off his sleeves. “I’ll walk with you.”

“What? No, it’s alright—”

Satoru waved the driver of the carriage off and waltzed over to you. “Too late. I’m committed now.”

You sighed in defeat, letting him walk with you. Silence loomed over you, the kind that made you hyper aware of every crunch the leaves under your feet made, every chirp the birds on nearby trees let out, and even every breath you didn’t know you kept holding.

“It’s a nice morning, huh?” He finally broke the tense silence, though the strain in his voice made it even more awkward.

“Yeah it is,” you glanced and nodded at him briefly.

Another long stretch of silence. When did you two become this way? Nevermind, you remembered the day it all had started a bit too clearly for your liking. But this seemed too delicate, too much. How was your walk with the arrogant Naoya Zenin more comfortable than one with the person you had spent nearly all your life with?

“So,” he started again, clearing his throat, “you walk this route every day?”

“It’s not that far,” you nodded.

“It’s been a while since I walked anywhere,” he chuckled softly to himself.

You risked a small smile in the midst of the unpleasant stillness. “Yeah, I remember. You always complained if the carriage wasn’t ready, or if you were sent to meet other clans on foot.”

“I was spoiled,” he grinned proudly. “Still am, probably.”

Despite yourself, you laughed softly. But it was fleeting, and the silence returned to keep reminding you of how much everything has changed. By the time you reached the gates of Jujutsu High, the sun was higher in the sky. Satoru stopped a few stops short of the massive gateway.

“Well, here you are,” he turned to look at you with softened eyes.

You nodded and adjusted your bag. “Thanks for walking with me.”

“Anytime,” he smiled. Faint as it was, it still didn’t reach his eyes.

In the faculty lounge at Jujutsu High, you sat with Utahime after she had barked at the other teachers to let her have some “alone time” with you. It seemed as if although she was trying her best to get you and Naoya together, she was hardly denying the rumours between you and her.

 She suddenly perked up mid-cursing at an answer paper of one of the third-years. “Oh, right! Did you hear? There’s a new recruit for a teaching position. Principal Yaga told me yesterday.”

“Oh, cool,” you snapped out of your own thoughts about the weird tension Naoya had landed you in. “Who’s interviewing them?”

“You, duh.” You groaned audibly and she laughed. 

“Hopefully it’s not another Ijichi,” you grumbled, wincing as you remembered the interview you had with him a few months ago.

“Be nice,” she said, though she snickered at the memory. “He was just nervous!”

“Nervous?” You huffed loudly. “Utahime, the man tripped over his own feet before he even sat down. And I wasn’t even intimidating!”

“You? Not intimidating?” She raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, definitely. Tell that to the first-years.”

“I’m a delight,” you shrugged, batting your eyelashes innocently. “Ijichi, on the other hand… couldn’t even make eye contact during the interview. I had to repeat my question three times before he answered.”

“Maybe this one will be better,” she got excited, and you knew what she was thinking of before it even came out of her mouth. “Who knows? They might even impress you—”

“No,” you snapped, and she giggled.

You were in enough of what your teenage self would have called “boy troubles” already to have a third one enter your life. First Satoru, then Naoya, and now Satoru again. You sighed. Shouldn’t you be flattered that a guy like Naoya shows interest in you? He’s rich, a noble (although the Gojo clan wouldn’t care about status either way), handsome and romantic. What more could you want? But on the other hand, Satoru is… well… him? You hardly think anyone would be able to compete with the Satoru you knew.

Utahime set down her papers and held your hand, as if determined to show you how a real man should hold you. “Alright, what’s wrong?” She asked gently. “You’ve been off for days. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”

You hesitated. “Satoru,” you muttered.

“Of course,” she sighed. She inhaled loudly before— “That insufferable, pompous cretin! A walking disgrace to his lineage! I’ve met noble horses with more grace and tact! A royal pain, in every possible way. That walking definition of idiocy needs to be knocked off his pedestal, preferably into a pile of mud.”

You blinked rapidly. You’d be lying if you understood a single word that she just said.

“What does that even mean?”

“Doesn’t matter,” she waved a hand dismissively, fuming with rage. “The point is, he’s an idiot. The biggest idiot. And if he’s making you feel like this, then I’m going to—”

“Okay, okay!” You smiled faintly at her ambitious attempt to choke thin air with her hands as if grabbing his throat. “But it’s not just him.”

“There’s more? It’s alright, I can fight—”

“Not for fighting!” You added quickly, alarmed. “It’s Naoya.”

“What did he do?” She stopped her antics.

“I just feel like I’m stuck between those two,” you palmed your face. You were utterly distraught. “Satoru keeps walking me to work, like he’s trying to fix things, but then Naoya, he’s been kind, attentive, and all of the good stuff you keep babbling about. I don’t know what to do if it ever came down to choosing between them.”

She leaned forward seriously, and forced your chin upwards to meet her eyes like your second mother. “Listen. Ask yourself two questions. First: Who sees you for you? Not the ‘I’m-strong-enough-to-not-need-anyone-else’ image you’ve been trying to put up, not the teacher you’ve become, but just… you. The good and the bad.”

“And the second?” You frowned thoughtfully.

“Who makes you feel safe?” She said simply. “Not just physically, but emotionally as well. Who can you trust with your heart, knowing they’ll look after it like the finest treasure?”

Like the finest treasure? The answer was simple.

But not the one you wanted.

Not who you craved.

“You don’t have to decide right now,” Utahime gave you a small smile. “Just don’t settle for less than you deserve, okay?”

You nodded gratefully. “You’re way better at this than you seem like, you know.”

“I’m a delight,” she echoed your words from earlier, giggling.

──── ୨ৎ ────

It had been almost a month since the walks with Satoru had begun. You had hoped as time went by you would’ve gotten more used to the tension it carried, but each day seemed to offer a new, worse one. The quietness lingered heavily between you, just like it had been all this while.

“So,” he started, glancing at you, “am I annoying you?”

“What?” You cross-questioned, startled at the insecurity in his voice. “No, why would you think that?”

“I dunno,” he shrugged, trying his best to be nonchalant, but you knew him too well to know it was an act. “It’s been over a month of me tagging along, and you haven’t said much. I thought maybe you’d prefer walking with someone else. Like Naoya,” he mumbled the last part.

“No,” you said firmly. “You’re not annoying—”

“I just hoped,” he cut you off, “you’d think this was better than with him. That’s all.”

You didn’t know how to respond, so you just hummed, looking away at a nearby tree and counting the number of leaves on it.

“Yeah,” Satoru chuckled quietly, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Thought so.”

You couldn’t reply to that.

“Here we are,” he murmured, opening the schoolgates for you just to find something to do. But when he followed behind you inside, you raised an eyebrow.

“You’re coming all the way in? Don’t worry, Naoya won’t step inside the school.”

“Good to know,” he adjusted his sunglasses, “but I’m not worried about Naoya.”

“Then?”

He closed the gates and turned to face you, beaming despite his earlier demeanour. “I’m a candidate for the teaching post.”

“What?!”

“What? You didn’t know?” He tilted his head, acting innocent. “Thought I’d apply for the position. Figured it was about time I contributed my immense knowledge to the next generation.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You? A teacher?”

“I’ll take that as a compliment even though it’s meaningless that way,” he pouted at you. He then pushed past you to the hallway. “You’re the one interviewing me, hopefully? Race you!”

“What the— Satoru, come back!” But he was already running to whatever empty classroom he could find. Talk about professionalism.

You marched off to Principal Yaga’s office and burst in, resulting in him nearly stabbing his own finger with a sewing needle. “Sir! I can’t do this.

“It’s 8 in the morning,” he sighed wearily. “And what is it that you can’t do?

“I cannot interview that man.”

“Why not?”

You gestured wildly at the hall, from where audible noises of furniture being dragged around could be heard. “Because it’s Gojo Satoru.”

“I see.” Yaga leaned back in his chair, staring at the hall with a transfixed look. “Well, if it’s such a problem, I’ll just have Utahime handle it.”

Uh oh.

“No, no. She’ll kill him. Literally.” And you didn’t feel like cleaning up a crime scene today.

“With killer questions?” He remarked thoughtfully, rubbing his chin. “Then it’s settled. She’ll—”

“No, sir! I’ll do it.”

“Are you sure? You don’t have to.”

“Yes I do,” you gritted your teeth. 

You had finally found the man after looking through twenty three whole classrooms spinning rapidly on a chair. You coughed loudly and he jumped, though he sighed in relief when he saw that it was just you.

“Thought I’d get fired if the Principal saw me this way,” he said as you sat on the chair in front of him. “And I haven’t even been hired yet. Imagine that!”

“You know I could reject you as a candidate as well, right?” You rolled your eyes.

“What? No, you wouldn’t!” He shouted indignantly. “I knew I shouldn’t have eaten your last mochi.”

“What? You ate my last mochi?”

Satoru gulped, and you groaned.

You clutched your clipboard, already regretting your decision. “Alright, Mr. Gojo. Let’s begin.”

He grinned. “Of course, Mrs. Gojo. Don’t let me distract you.”

“Let’s start with the basics,” you tried to sound as professional as you could. “What experience do you have working with students?”

“Well, I’ve been mentoring the younger sorcerers unofficially,” he leaned back in his chair with a lazy smile. “Does being charming count?”

“No.”

“Really?” He tilted his head. “Because I think it’s working on you.”

You paused. “This isn’t a date,” you glared at him. “It’s an interview.”

“So you do know what a date is,” his grin widened in size. “Guess Naoya didn’t ruin you completely.”

“Why do you want this position?” You gritted your teeth.

“Figured I’d spend more time with you.”

“How do you handle indiscipline in the classroom?” You deadpanned.

“Depends,” he tapped his chin thoughtfully. “Are we talking about kids or you?”

Fucking—

“Do you even want this job?”

“I do,” he said simply.

You slammed your clipboard on the table in annoyance and stood up. “You’re following me, aren’t you?” You pointed an accusing finger at his face.

He looked at you incredulously. “What? No. Why would I—” He stopped, and his tone softened. “I’m here because I’m sick of the nobility and their entitlement.”

“Huh?”

“You heard me.” He stood up as well, crossing his arms and speaking more earnestly than you had ever heard from him. “Kids from those circles? You can’t change them — they’re too far gone. But here? The students come from humble families. They still have a shot at thinking for themselves, at doing things for the right reasons. I want to make sure they don’t grow up like us.”

You were stunned into silence, but before you could respond, a voice came from the doorway.

“Congratulations, Satoru Gojo. You’re hired,” said Principal Yaga, sparing one glance into the room and then leaving again.

Satoru’s expression changed again, and he was beaming like he hadn’t just bared his soul out to you a few moments ago. “Looks like you’re stuck with me, huh?”

You groaned, burying your face in your hands. “…Great.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

“This,” you gestured to a nearby door, “is the main classroom. It’s where first-years have their lessons. It’s equipped with barriers for live combat simulations, so the—”

“You know, you’ve got a really soothing voice,” Satoru cut in. “Ever think of switching to narration?”

“Shut up,” you shot him a glare. “Are you just here to waste my time?”

“Can’t I appreciate you a little?” He pouted, but when your look refused to soften, his shoulder sank and head drooped, and he trailed behind you like a small puppy.

So cute.

No, fuck, what the fuck are you thinking?

You walked on ahead, and the whispers from all those years ago that had remained in your thoughts seemed to bloom louder again.

You don’t even belong in this house!

We’re not kids forever, you know.

The two people I trust the most in this world!

Nothing more. Nothing less.

“Are you oka—?”

“Why are you here, Satoru?”

His smirk faltered. “I told you. I want to help shape the next generation—”

“And you’re telling me it has nothing to do with me?”

His gaze softened. “Would it be so bad if it did?”

You bit your lip, trying to shut out all the voices echoing in your head. “After what you said to me all those years ago? Because if you think that can be fixed then—”

“Stop.”

You did.

“I don’t know how old you think I was then, but it’s not like you were any older than me at that time. I want you to understand that,” he spun you around to face him, “I want to change. I want to show you how much I regret raising my voice at you that way.”

“Is that all you regret?” You asked.

He paused a bit, then fixed his sunglasses to cover his eyes completely. “No. I regret saying that—”

“Hey there!” chirped in a voice you almost didn’t recognize from how much you were focussing on Satoru’s words. Satoru’s face hardened when he saw the person waving at you from behind. You turned to look at him.

“Naoya?”

“Yes, missed me? I dropped Maki with the driver earlier than usual for you,” Naoya strode up to you, and hooked his arm with yours, snatching you away from Satoru’s grip. “Let’s walk you home, darling.”

“You know, Naoya, for someone who talks a lot about class, you’re pretty shameless when it comes to interrupting private conversations,” Satoru spat venomously, making the latter turn around to face him sneering.

“Private? Oh, forgive me,” Naoya snickered. “I didn’t realize you were finally learning how to talk to a woman. But could you get a different one? This one’s taken.”

“Oh, shut up. Isn’t it past your bedtime, Zenin? Shouldn’t you be off practicing your bowing skills or groveling to your clan?”

“Groveling?” Naoya smirked, clearly unbothered. “Not my style, Gojo. That’s more your speed, isn’t it? Or did you think running off to teach would make people forget how much of a disappointment you are?”

“Uh, okay,” you tried to interrupt. “I don’t think—” 

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Satoru cut you off, leaning forward with mock curiosity. “Must be hard living in a world where your only personality trait is kissing your elders’ feet.”

“Says the man who threw away everything his clan worked for,” Naoya mocked back. “Couldn’t handle the pressure of actually being useful?”

“Useful?” Satoru laughed maniacally, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. “Is that what you call wagging your tail for every decision the Zenin fossils make?”

“Enough! Please. You two are acting like kids—” You stepped in between them and raised your hands.

“Don’t think I don’t see what you’re doing, Gojo,” Naoya chided. “Trying to fix what you broke, crawling back like the desperate little rat you are.”

“Desperate, huh? And what are you? You’re just a carbon copy of every other one of your morons. Must be boring living without a spine.”

“Better a spine than whatever it is you call yourself. A disgrace to the Gojo clan. No wonder they’ve been so quiet about you. They’re probably embarrassed.”

“Okay, enough! I don’t have time for this,” you shouted.

Naoya immediately shut up. “Are we overwhelming you, darling? I can always walk you home. Gojo here,” his expression soured again, “can find his own way back.”

Satoru’s jaw tightened. “Funny, I was about to say the same thing about you.”

“Yeah? Then why don’t you just let her choose?”

“Of course.”

Both of them turned to you simultaneously, and you made a mental note to never interrupt their conversations ever again. Before things could escalate further, however, a sharp voice cut in.

“What in the name of all things holy, proper, appropriate, virtuous, demure, and absolutely not Utahime Iori is going on here?”

“Wow, did you just compare yourself to a holy being?” Satoru snickered, and earned a slap on the back of his head by her.

“I said ‘absolutely not’, you white-haired freak.”

“Utahime!” You sighed in relief, running to hug her around the waist, and she patted your head pitifully.

“There, there. You were stuck in this pissing contest between manchildren, weren’t you? You poor, poor soul.”

“Woman,” Naoya curled his lip, “don’t you have better things to do than stick your nose where it doesn’t belong?”

“Like you’re doing right now?” Utahime replied coolly. “We’re leaving,” she yanked you away from them with her.

“Wait—” Naoya protested.

“Hey—” Satoru stepped forward.

“No. Bye,” Utahime turned around with her nose high in the air, and you gave a meek wave to both of them. They did cancel their plans to walk you home, but god did you feel grateful to be dragged away from their fights about winning you like an object.

──── ୨ৎ ────

Life had taken a strange, twisting turn ever since Satoru had re-entered your world. The once awkward silences during his walks with you were replaced by lively conversations now. He was speaking to you more now. He would sometimes do or say things that reminded you of how he was, but it wasn’t quite the same. He still hadn’t joined you for dinner again, despite the seat you subconsciously left empty every night at the table.

Meanwhile, Naoya was relentless in his pursuit — walking you to school, picking you up, showing up at your door with every excuse in the book, Impress to Repress: A Noble’s Guide to Obtain the Perfect Wife. Funnily enough, you didn’t suppose it would be too far-fetched to think he had that book somewhere in his room with the way he would speak with you.

“I thought you might need help carrying your books,” he’d say, flashing you that perfect smile as though you couldn’t see past the charm. Or: “A lady shouldn’t walk alone in the evening.” And his favorite: “I dropped Maki off early for you.”

It wasn’t entirely unwelcome, though. Naoya was charming and thoughtful in a way that had its appeal, but it also left you feeling like you were being swooped away too far, like he was a strong tide made to sweep you off your feet. But when the tide receded, you found yourself glancing over your shoulder, wondering if Satoru had noticed.

Just who should you love?

Naoya was kind — kinder than you’d expected him to be. He knew how to make you laugh, smile, blush all the same. But his ego often left you bristling. He would decide for you even though you wanted to do it yourself, and part of you wondered if he was just like the Kamo servants and nobles you had seen earlier.

And then there was Satoru. He’d shattered your heart three years ago with careless words. The memory still burned like a fresh wound, but there were moments now when you saw something different in him. Something softer. Something that almost made you believe he could fix what he’d broken. But it was too toxic to linger on.

You reached the teacher’s lounge and found it empty except for Utahime, who was leaning against a desk, flipping through a stack of papers. She glanced up as you entered.

“Finally decided to get a break?”

“Yeah. Did you bully all the other teachers out again?”

“Thank me for that,” she poked her tongue out as you sat down laughing.

“Actually, I came here to ask you something,” you hesitated.

“Hm?”

“Why—” you huffed. “Why did you step in that day? You know, with both of them. You were supposed to let me… choose.”

Utahime set her pen down with a soft sigh. “Because you weren’t ready.”

“What do you mean?” You frowned. “I could’ve—”

“Could you, though?” She wondered loudly. “I’ve known you long enough to recognize when you’re drowning in your own head. You’re still holding onto pieces of your past with Satoru while Naoya’s practically dragging you into his future. And you? You’re just standing there, caught in the middle, hoping someone else will make the choice for you.”

You spluttered at how accurately she described your situation. “But you said—”

“I said ‘take your time’, didn’t I?”

“You did,” you sighed. “But what if it’s too late?”

“If it is, then a choice will be made for you,” her eyes darkened. “You know what clans are like. The Kamo clan even set up a proposal for Satoru, and he was just seventeen at the time.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but what could you say? If it wasn’t for your mother that day, Satoru would’ve been married off at the mere age of seventeen. The Kamo clan’s elder daughter had been married off at a young age as well, from what you had heard from their maids. Who’s to say that won’t be the case for you as well? How long could your mother shelter you after all?

Utahime softened slightly. “I stepped in that day because you needed time. But don’t think for a second that I’m going to keep doing it. This is your life. Your future. And you’re the only one who gets to decide who’s in it. So stop running in circles.”

“But I’m scared,” you croaked out.

“Scared?”

“What if I make the wrong choice?” You said quietly, looking down at your own hands.

Utahime leaned back with a small smile. “Then you deal with it, just like everyone else. But at least it’ll be your choice, not theirs.”

You nodded slightly.

“Oh, and one more thing — next time, don’t let two grown men fight over you in public. It’s embarrassing.”

You sat there, chewing on your own nail and wondering if you should laugh, cry, or start packing your bags to run away from both Satoru and Naoya entirely.

──── ୨ৎ ────

On Utahime’s advice, you had prepared two separate diaries to recount heart-fluttering scenarios you had with each man to help you ‘decide’ between them. As much as you found the whole idea ridiculous, you figured trying it won’t hurt. You had asked both Naoya and Satoru to buy you a diary each just to see how differing the outcomes would be.

Now, you picked a diary that looked posh and had a sophisticated-looking leather twine to strap it shut. The cover looked menacing, and the pages were eerily white. You did not have to second-guess to know who bought this one.

“Naoya,” you muttered, scribbling his name along the first page. You then turned to the next page, and began writing.

1. Cafe dates... he always ordered my drink without asking. Polite, attentive, charming... but also predictable.

2. Parent-teacher meeting dates? Oh god, does that even count? It’s just like what Satoru said.

You paused. Were you supposed to add Satoru’s name while writing in Naoya’s diary? Scoffing, you continued.

He made sure my notes were perfect, held doors open, smiled at every passing teacher like he was running for class president.

3. Dinner at the estate — ugh. The way he spoke to mother, like he was auditioning to be the next clan leader. Why is he so flawless?

You groaned aloud.

“Is he just too perfect or am I just being unfair?”

Annoyed, and also running out of romantic scenarios to write for Naoya’s diary, you picked up Satoru’s diary. It was like the old one you had maintained when you were thirteen. You giggled a little remembering how much you had to plan and strategize on the diary’s hidden location to keep it away from him. You couldn’t be caught dead with him knowing what was in it.

The first thing he had said when you had asked for a new diary was, “Why, is my charm too much for you that you have to pen it down so you don’t overflow?” And god, was he right.

You ran your fingers on the spine of the diary. It was your favourite colour — you wondered how he still remembered that. Did he have his own secret diary you had to find soon? You opened it and began writing.

“Where do I even start with you, you pumpkin?” You giggled at the words you had just scribbled.

1. The staff room date. Well, if you can even call it a date. You barged in uninvited, stole half my lunch, and started criticizing my handwriting like you were some literary genius. Just like you used to. What did you call it when we were kids? A calligraphy competition on every page, huh?

You remembered the scenario all too well.

The staffroom was peaceful for once, the only sounds coming from the ticking clock and the low murmur of the other teachers quietly going about their breaks. You were tucked into the corner by the windows, your lunch spread in front of you, savoring the rare moment.

And of course, it was then that the door flung open with an obnoxious swing.

Satoru Gojo.

You didn’t even have to look up.

“Well, well, look who’s having lunch all alone! No invite for me? Rude.” he smirked, sliding into the chair opposite you like he belonged there. Without waiting for your response, he reached over and casually snatched a piece of your lunch.

You sighed. “I didn’t invite you because I didn’t want you here.”

“Fair enough. Lucky for you, I’m here to grace you with my presence anyway.” He gobbled up your lunch. “Hmm, not bad. You didn’t cook this yourself, did you?”

You snatched your box away from him. “Can you not? This is my lunch.”

Satoru leaned back with a huff. “Whatever.” He noticed your open notebook. “What’s this? Lesson plans? Don’t tell me you’ve been taking this teaching thing seriously.”

“Don’t touch that!”

But he did. And he held it out of reach, flipping through the pages. “Relax, I’m just taking a look. Whoa. Your handwriting hasn’t changed a bit.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know, it looks like you’re trying to win an award for best handwriting or something.”

You flushed. “I just like making it neat!”

“Neat? Are you kidding? I remember trying to copy your style once when we were kids, and mom thought I was possessed.”

You snorted. “Maybe you were just bad at writing.”

“Oh, absolutely. I gave up halfway and just stuck to my chicken scratch.”

2. The sparring match. I hated you for pairing up with me for what? “Showing the kids how it’s done”? What does that even mean? And what kind of lunatic goes easy for three rounds and then wipes the floor with you in the fourth? But afterward, you stayed to help me fix my form. You didn’t have to... but you did.

In the grounds, you stood with your wand in your hand, and across from you stood Satoru, smirking confidently, his wand poised like an extension of his arm.

“Showing off, huh?”

“Shut up, you’re the one who needed my help in ‘teaching these kiddos’,” you shot back. “And besides, I don’t need you to show off in front of them."

“Who said I’m showing off?” He grinned. “Just here to make sure you don’t embarrass yourself.”

He flicked his wand, sending light spells your way. You blocked them as best as you could, but he was always one step ahead.

“You’re not even trying!” You shouted.

“Of course not, I’m just giving you a chance.”

But then, without warning, he shifted his stance and cast a powerful spell that knocked your wand from your hand.

“What the—?”

“Language.”

“—hell”

“Just showing you how it’s done,” he shrugged, and you gritted your teeth.

He stepped closer, handing you your wand. Reluctantly, you took your wand.

“Since when did you become better than me at this?” You asked him.

“Since you forgot your old self among your new troubles,” he replied with a twinkle in his eye.

3. The stargazing. God, Satoru, you’re insufferable. Who even points out constellations while lying on the grass and makes up fake names for them just to make someone laugh?

You laid on the grass, watching the night sky stretch endlessly above you. Satoru was beside you, dramatically pointing at every star he could set his eyes on.

“You see that one? That’s the Satoru constellation. Handsome, charming, and clearly the best in the sky.”

“I don’t think that’s a real constellation,” you giggled.

“It is if I say it is,” he pulled a face.

“Alright, alright,” you shook your head. “You’re impossible.”

“And yet, here you are. Lying next to me, staring at my constellation.”

You stayed quiet, watching as his expression softened. He turned to you, lifting his head with the palm of his hand and looking right into your eyes with his bright blue ones.

“You know,” he whispered. “Stars are kind of overrated.”

You turned to look at him. “Why’s that?”

He spared half a glance at the sky before leaning in to nuzzle into your neck, but he stopped short, barely a few inches away from your skin. “Because I’ve been staring at something brighter all night.”

Your breath hitched, but before you could respond, he turned back to the sky, his usual grin breaking the moment. “I’m just a chill guy, just thinking, you know.”

“About what?” You asked curiously.

“How someone as brilliant as you still gets stars in her eyes every time she looks up.”

“Wow, that’s surprisingly poetic of you.”

“Right?” He gushed over himself. “Don’t get used to it though. I have a reputation to maintain.”

“There it is,” you smiled.

“But seriously,” he laid his head down on the grass right next to your chest. “I don’t mind the stars. I just think the view’s better when you’re in it.”

You turned away, pretending to admire the flowers, but the heat in your cheeks might have given you away.

Why did you look at me like that, like I was the only star that mattered?

──── ୨ৎ ────

Maki leaned against your desk, watching you intently. “So... what's going on with you and Naoya?”

You widened your eyes. She had insisted on staying back to help you rearrange the chairs after class, yet here she was now, asking you questions about your personal life. 

“Why does that matter?” You asked, sounding more defensive than you had intended to be.

“He’s from my clan,” she said, as if that was enough of a reason for you to talk about the weird love triangle you had landed yourself in. She sat on your desk, swinging her legs up and down.

“Look, I... I don’t really know. I mean, it’s definitely more than what I expected, but I’m not sure where it’s going.”

Maki raised an eyebrow, her lips pressing into a thin line as if she was considering something. She seemed rather skeptical.

“Alright, just don’t martyr yourself for him.”

Your stomach twisted at her words. Did she even realize what she was saying? You looked up at her, trying to read her expression, but it was hard to tell what she was really thinking.

“What does that even mean?” You asked incredulously.

Maki sighed, pushing herself off from the desk. She walked a few steps towards you. “He’s not worth it,” she said, and then she left the classroom just like that.

What the hell?

You’d known all this while the Zenin clan was among the more orthodox and conservative ones, and you considered yourself lucky to be part of the Gojo clan, one of the more lenient ones. But seeing a young girl, a student you had been teaching for a while nonetheless, voice out a cryptic message, or rather a plea for help from misogynistic fucks, perhaps, made you second-guess the whole idea all over again.

Just what has this girl been through?

Later that day, you spotted Maki and Naoya leaving together, and felt the pit in your stomach deepen.

Something was not right.

──── ୨ৎ ────

Your ears had perked up when you had been told by your mother that there was another meeting of the clans of the nobility, but that wasn’t what had you interested. It was the fact that all the clans would be present, and that included the Ieri, Iori and Geto clans. As much as you were sure your friends would hate to attend this stupid meeting, Satoru’s suggestion of sneaking out made you far more excited than you should be.

So here you were, writing letters to Shoko and Suguru to attend the meeting at all costs after barking Utahime’s ear off to do so as well. You crumpled your parchment up and threw it in a corner for the fifth time.

What were you even supposed to write to friends you’ve grown apart from?

You huffed and began scribbling on fresh parchment once more.

Dear Shoko,

I can already picture you rolling your eyes at this letter. “What is she up to now after not keeping contact for ages?” you’re probably thinking. Well, for once, it’s not mischief, or boy troubles, or even weird investigations cough cough.

It’s been so long since we last saw each other, and I’ve missed you more than words can say. Remember when we used to sneak out of classes just to sit under the old tree and complain about literally everyone? Things have changed so much since then — we’ve changed so much. But I think a part of me still hopes that when I see you, it’ll feel like no time has passed at all.

There’s a clan meeting coming up (ugh, I know), and I heard your clan will be attending. Please tell me you’re coming. I’ll even tolerate your sarcasm if it means we can catch up properly. Bring your flask, too — I have a feeling we’ll need it. Oak tree, Iori Estate, don’t forget.

I can’t wait to see you again. Write back if you have the time, or just show up and surprise me. Either way, I’ll be waiting.

With love and exasperation, Your favourite patient

Good enough, you thought, but Shoko probably won’t even read all of that. Eh well it didn’t matter anyway.

Dear Suguru,

How have you been? Really been? I’ve missed having someone to talk to who actually listens. I’m sure your clan keeps you busy, but I hope you’ve found a moment or two to breathe.

There’s a clan meeting coming up, and I heard the Geto Clan will be attending. Just the thought of seeing you again after all these years makes me... well, nervous, if I’m honest. Not because of anything bad, but because there’s so much I want to say, so much I’ve wanted to ask you.

Do you remember the last time we all sat together, back when things were simpler? I miss that. I miss us. Maybe this meeting will give us a chance to find that again — at least a little.

I hope you’ll be there. No pressure, of course, but if you come, we’ll be waiting under the oak tree out back in the Iori estate. We’d really like to see you.

Take care of yourself, Suguru. And don’t overthink this letter as much as I overthought writing it.

Yours, Your favourite troublemaker

──── ୨ৎ ────

You sat across from Satoru in the carriage to the meeting in silence. His eyes were fixed on the passing scenery outside, but you could tell from the way his fingers fidgeted against his knee that his mind was elsewhere — most likely at the fact that both his mother and father were in another carriage together.

Over the years, their relationship had grown even more strained than it had become on that unfortunate day. You couldn’t imagine what it would be like for either of them to be forced to act like a healthy couple for the sake of a few hours in front of thousands of other people.

“Satoru?” You called softly, and he snapped out of his thoughts.

“Hm?”

You patted his knee. “They’ll be fine.”

He huffed a short laugh, turning his head just enough to glance at you. “You’re too optimistic. What if they explode at each other in the middle of the meeting? Or worse, drag the entire Gojo name through the mud?”

“Then you can just blame me,” you shrugged, trying to lighten the mood. “Say I tripped and caused a distraction, or spilled tea on someone important, or whatever it is that nobles dislike.”

“Oh? And they would believe that? Miss perfect student?” He cracked a small smile.

“I’m not a student anymore,” you stuck your tongue out at him, and he laughed.

“Yeah, but I don’t think that would really improve things.”

“It might. Chaos is a great way to bond people. Just look at us!”

He turned fully to face you now in amusement. “That’s your big plan? Turn the meeting into a comedy night?”

“If it gets you to stop worrying for five seconds, then yes,” you smiled.

He leaned back in his seat, the faintest smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

“Maybe. But ridiculous is what you need right now.”

He held your gaze for a moment, the storm in his eyes quieting just a little. “Thanks… for, you know, trying.”

“Trying?” You gasped as if offended. “I excel at this. Just wait — by the end of this night, you’ll owe me for single-handedly saving the Gojo name.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

You tiptoed through the dimly lit corridor, Satoru trailing behind you with his usual cocky grin. He wasn’t exactly stealthy, but he was trying his best, even if his ‘best’ meant occasionally tripping over his own feet and knocking random armours on the way.

“This is dumb,” he whispered to you. “We should just portal her out.”

“No! Tha’ll make it too obvious,” you whisper-shouted. “We’re supposed to be discreet.”

“You’re whispering like a toddler playing hide-and-seek,” he snorted and you shushed him. “That’s the opposite of discreet.”

“Shut up. Now where’s the oak tree?”

“Out?”

“Obviously, genius, but where’s ‘out’?”

“Uhhhh,” he dragged out his response before pointing to a very clear exit. “There? You didn’t see that yet?”

You chose not to dignify that jab with a response, pushing open the door to where Shoko and Suguru were supposed to wait for you as per your letters.

“Fuck, it’s dark in here,” your voice echoed for some reason.

“Careful, princess. Wouldn’t want you to be caught swearing like you’re not from a noble clan,” Satoru snickered, and you wanted to whack him on the head like Utahime had done the other day.

“About time,” a bored voice said, making the two of you jump and turn in horror, staring at the darkness to make out the figures that were inching closer and closer to you. “We thought you chickened out from what you said in the letter.”

“Sh-Shoko?”

“Duh.”

“Shoko!” You ran up to her as she came into the light of the estate, hugging her like your life depended on it. “Missed you.”

“Missed you too,” she patted your shoulder. “Did you two get lost, or were you off making out in a broom closet or something?”

“What?” You deadpanned. “I haven’t seen you in years, and this is how you greet me?”

Suguru grinned from beside her. “I mean, she’s not entirely wrong,” he gave a light punch on the chest to Satoru. “You’re a little flushed.”

“See?” Satoru smirked. “I told you we should’ve taken the broom closet route. Much more efficient.”

You groaned. “Leave that! Utahime’s stuck in some ridiculous ceremony, and we need a plan to get her out.”

“How bad could it be?” Shoko said. “Light some incense, wave your hands, maybe sacrifice a virgin or two, chant a bit, and she’s done, right?”

“You’ve clearly never been to an Iori ritual,” Suguru replied. “They’re like a cult, but boring.”

“Oh, they’re worse than boring,” said Satoru. “They make you kneel for hours, bowing and chanting. And if you screw up, they start over. It’s like boot camp for spiritualists.”

“Exactly,” you said, sighing. “So, we need a distraction. Something big enough to pull her out but small enough not to get us executed by her clan.”

“I say we fake an emergency,” suggested Suguru. “Like, ‘Oh no, a curse is loose!’ Then she’s got to leave.”

“Too obvious,” Shoko lit a cigarette. “They’ll know it’s fake when Satoru doesn’t stop the ‘curse’ immediately.”

“How about an eating contest?” proposed Satoru, immediately earning an actual punch from Shoko.

“What if we convince them that Utahime has to perform an exorcism somewhere else?” asked Suguru. “Like, say, the riverside.”

You snapped your fingers at his brilliance. “Yes! Perfect! We’ll say her ‘spiritual energy’ is needed for a very urgent ritual. Shoko, you’ll pretend to be an elder. Suguru, you’re the messenger. Satoru, just— stand there and look important.”

“Excuse me? I am always important.”

“Anyway—” Shoko interrupted, taking a long drag. “I bought props just because.” She pulled out her bag and unzipped it. Out came tumbling fake moustaches, eyebrows, caps, cloaks and god knows what.

“What the—” you were stunned. “Why did you get this stuff?”

“Told you, just because,” she shrugged. “It’s a stupid clan union meeting. Thought we’d need some entertainment.”

“Shoko, you’re a genius.”

The four of you tried to find the ritual hall amongst the many rooms of the estate. After bullying a random security guard and having him lead you to the hall, Satoru dramatically banged the door open. The elders of the Iori clan all turned to look at the four of you, and Utahime, who was kneeling in the center surrounded by them, glanced up and immediately put her head back down with curses disguised as a cough.

The air was thick with incense and your eyes were burning. Shoko scratched her fake beard, and stepped forward to speak in a loud, rumbling voice. “Elders of the Iori clan!” She lifted her hands up and flailed her arms around wildly to address them. “There has been a disturbance under your watch,” she thundered, “in the northern woods, of which none can speak.”

“A disturbance?” A grandma squeaked. “What kind, Master Yoo?”

You had no idea who Master Yoo was, but if this plan was working, you didn’t care either.

“It shall remain classified,” Suguru stepped forward slowly with a hunchback and a stick. “None can speak of it without endangering  everyone else.”

“It is the kind,” you bowed to them, “that only the heir of a true princess born to a clan as unique as yours, in the shadow of an oak as old as yours and for a purpose as grave as this may resolve.”

“Us?” An old man exclaimed. “So you have chosen us?”

“Your heir, to be exact,” Suguru clarified.

“Ah, well, then, we shall send the boy—”

“The girl, please,” you deadpanned.

The elders blinked. “Why the girl?”

“Her energy is unique and, uh, mesmerizing,” Shoko boomed, making them fall to their knees. She dramatically walked to the squeaking grandma and grabbed her by both collars of her kimono. “Your heiress has been chosen by the spirits of the longgone.”

“Chosen, you say?” She squeaked in response. ��Why wasn’t this revealed earlier?”

Satoru sighed dramatically while you lifted Utahime up. “Do you always question the will of the spirits? No wonder they never bless this place.”

The elders were flustered. They waved Utahime away. She rose stiffly and, still muttering long strings of curses, followed you all out.

Minutes later, the five of you were lounging by the riverside, the cool night breeze rustling the trees. A bottle of sake was being passed between you, the props of earlier long discarded.

“A divine mission? Really?” Utahime was exasperated. “That’s the best you could come up with?”

You laughed, and Shoko said, “Well, it worked, that’s all that matters.”

“You’re welcome by the way,” Satoru grinned. My ‘important face’ is the only thing that made the whole act believable.”

“That’s because you’re aging,” you sighed. “Aging enough to be one of those elders by now.”

“Owie, that hurt.”

“Your face is important for comedy, not authority, Satoru,” said Suguru. Then, he raised his drink. “To divine missions, friendships, and chaos wherever we go.”

“Cheers!”

The moon was still high, and you wondered how long it would take for your clans to realize that all of you were missing from the main event. The air was filled with the faint sounds of laughter and clinking bottles as your friends enjoyed themselves nearby. Satoru, however, had wandered off to the water’s edge. He crouched, plucking smooth stones from the shore and skipping them across the surface with surprising precision.

You hesitated for a moment, then walked over, unable to resist teasing him.

“What’s this?” You asked playfully. “The Gojo Satoru, retreating from the crowd to have a quiet moment with his thoughts? I thought you thrived on attention.”

Satoru did not look back at you. “Oh, I do,” he half-chuckled. “But I also thrive on balance. Can’t be too perfect all the time — it makes people insecure.”

You snorted. “How generous of you to consider the feelings of the peasants.”

He glanced back at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. “See? You get it.”

“Oh, I get it. You’re just here to keep the river from feeling too plain without your dazzling presence.”

He laughed, straightening up and brushing his hands on his pants. “Alright, you caught me. I was giving them all a break from my charm. But what’s your excuse? Couldn’t handle the drinking game?”

“More like I couldn’t handle Suguru trying to explain his ‘philosophical approach’ to sake. What did he say again? ‘Is the sake good because you’re dreaming, or are you dreaming because you’re drinking good sake?’ My brain was melting.”

“Fair point. His monologues can be,” he grinned, “intense.”

You stood beside him now, staring out at the water. He tossed another stone, this one skipping three times before sinking. “Is this what you do when no one’s watching? Brood by the river and play with rocks?”

“First of all, it’s called skipping stones, not playing with rocks. Second, brooding? Me? That’s your job.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re the one standing there like the protagonist of a tragic romance novel, sighing at the stars. Very dramatic.”

You nudged his arm, rolling your eyes.

“You’re impossible.”

“And yet, you’re still here.”

There was a comfortable silence over both of you. The night felt quieter now, the laughter from the group fading into the background. You shifted, suddenly aware of how close you were standing.

“...You okay?” You asked softly.

He turned to you, his usual grin faltering just slightly. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know. Just feels like there’s something on your mind.”

He held your gaze for a moment, then looked back at the water. “Maybe. But nothing a little stone-skipping and your terrible jokes can’t fix.”

“Terrible?” You grinned. “I’ll have you know I’m the funniest person you love.”

“You’re the only person I love.”

Your smile faded a bit as you looked into his eyes, and he did the same. Suddenly, everything you did was making you feel embarrassed — your breathing, blinking, shaking hands… until he grasped your fingers and put them on his chest.

“Do you feel that?”

Yes.

I feel the love.

You nodded, and he smiled a little. He tipped your chin up to meet your gaze. “How about we ditch the ditching of our super important clan meeting?”

“There’s nothing I wanna do more,” you breathed.

You and Satoru were sneaking back toward the main hall, your laughter still echoing softly as you wiped imaginary dust off his shoulder.

“I can’t believe you slipped on that rock,” you poked your tongue out at him. “All that talk about being graceful—”

“It was one rock, and it was slippery,” he cut you off. “Besides, I saved it. You’re the one who almost fell in the river trying not to laugh.”

“Saved it? You looked like a baby seal trying to ice skate.”

His mock-offended gasp earned another burst of laughter from you. But as you approached the entrance to the meeting hall, your mirth faded. Standing just outside the large carved doors was Satoru’s mother, speaking to a few people. But then she turned around, and her piercing eyes narrowed as they landed on the two of you.

“You two,” she said sharply, and you winced in unison. “How fortunate you both decided to rejoin us.”

“Fortunate?” Satoru was unfazed. “Or just impeccable timing, Mother? You know I always aim to impress.”

“Your absence was noted.” She ignored him completely and turned to look at you. The subtle scrutiny in her eyes made you feel like you’d been caught sneaking sweets from the pantry.

“We just needed some air after all the formalities,” you added hastily.

“Then I trust you’ve had enough of it.”

Without waiting for a reply, Satoru’s mother coolly turned and swept back into the hall. Satoru let out a dramatic sigh. “Well, that was fun.”

Shaking your head, you followed him into the hall. The hum of conversation and clinking glasses immediately engulfed you. The room was grand, the walls lined with banners representing the noble clans in attendance. You recognized faces from the Kamo and Iori clans, along with a handful of others. The two of you slid into unoccupied chairs near the back, just out of your parents’ immediate line of sight.

“Let me guess,” Satoru whispered to you. “Five minutes in here, and you’ll be begging to sneak out again.”

“Ten minutes. I’m trying to behave.”

“You? Behave? That’s new.”

True to his prediction, boredom set in quickly though. The speeches droned on about alliances and tradition, and Satoru began fidgeting. At one point, he caught your eye and mouthed, ‘Let’s go.’

Before you could answer, he grabbed your hand and led you toward the balcony doors. He tugged you through the crowd, weaving around clan leaders and dignitaries with the ease of someone who knew exactly how untouchable they were. You barely managed to stifle a laugh at the old nosy lady he had pushed as he pushed them open and pulled you into the cool night air.

“Satoru — people are watching!”

“Good. They can admire how stunning you look while I steal you away.”

You stood against the railing, the city lights below shimmering like scattered stars, though none of them could light you up like the man in front of you did. Satoru leaned beside you, his elbow brushing against yours.

“Do you ever wonder why they even bother with these meetings? It’s just a bunch of old people pretending they’re still important.”

“Careful,” you smiled. “Those ‘old people’ include your parents.”

“Apologies. Allow me to rephrase: a bunch of old people... and my extraordinarily distinguished parents.”

You laughed softly. “It’s not like you and me here are any better. What is to guarantee that I won’t be bored here?

“Bored? Here, with me? I’m hurt. My company is way more exciting than whatever that was,” he gestured wildly towards the hall. He leaned against the railing, his silver hair catching the moonlight like it was showing itself  off. “And besides, you’re the one who kept looking at me like you wanted to escape. Don’t deny it.”

You crossed your arms, raising a brow. “Oh, I was looking at you? Pretty sure it was the other way around, Gojo.”

His grin widened, his eyes narrowing in mock challenge. “Caught me. Can you blame me, though? You’re kind of hard not to stare at.”

The way he said it — too casual, too confident — made your heart skip a beat. Just like it always would when he was around. Just like always.

“Do you ever get tired of flirting?”

Without missing a beat, he replied, “Do you ever get tired of pretending you don’t like it?”

You opened your mouth to retort, but nothing came out. He tilted his head, watching you with an expression that was both smug and softer than usual. “Speechless? That’s a first. I’ll take it — and your blushing face — as a win. See, you like my balcony adventures!”

You sputtered, trying to deny it, but he only laughed, the sound low and warm in the quiet night.

“Maybe I just like the view.”

“Flirting back now?” said Satoru, and you furrowed your brows at him. “I knew you’d cave eventually.”

“That is not what I meant.”

“Too late now,” he grabbed your hand for a second time that night. “I think I like this better,” he leaned in.

The space between you felt smaller. His voice was quieter as he added, “I meant what I said near the riverside. I always will.”

A hand wrapped around your waist, and you couldn’t care less about the number of people that could walk in on you at this exact moment. You inched closer to him, too shy to ask for what you wanted. But he did so as well, granting you the permission you needed.

You closed your eyes, parting your lips.

A sister.

No, that was a lie.

He loved you.

Your lips brushed against each other’s for half a second before—

“Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

You both jumped slightly, and Satoru pulled back, his expression immediately darkening. You turned to see Naoya strolling toward you with his usual smug smile.

“Hope I’m not interrupting anything important,” he bowed in front of you, kissing the back of your hand like he owned it. “Care to join me for a dance?”

You opened your mouth to answer, but Satoru stepped forward, his hand still lightly brushing your other one. “Actually, we were in the middle of something—”

“I’m sure it can wait. After all, a Zenin doesn’t ask twice.”

You glanced between them, and with a resigned sigh, you forced a polite smile and stepped toward Naoya, your heart sinking as you felt Satoru’s hand fall away.

“...I’ll be back,” you said to Satoru.

His only response was a tight nod. As Naoya led you back inside, you couldn’t help but glance over your shoulder. Satoru stood there on the balcony, his hands in his pockets, watching as you disappeared into the crowd.

Naoya led you onto the dance floor with confident strides. “You’re light on your feet. A perfect match for me, wouldn’t you agree?”

You bit back a retort, focusing instead on the music and not the way his hand lingered just a little too long on your waist. You still weren’t sure whether the tingling on your hand was because of Naoya’s little kiss or due to Satoru’s touches earlier. And you didn’t get a chance to ponder on it either.

Naoya twirled you out dramatically, and when he pulled you back in, his lips brushed your knuckles in a gesture too showy to be sincere.

From the corner of your eye, you caught Satoru leaning against a pillar stiffly. His hands were shoved deep into his pockets, but you could see the tension in his shoulders. His jaw was tightened as he watched Naoya spin you across the floor.

“Unbelievable,” you read his lips.

But if he had a problem, he’d say something, you thought. Or was he too much of a coward to do so?

Naoya dipped you — dramatically, of course — and you couldn’t miss the way Satoru’s expression darkened, his knuckles whitening as his hands clenched into fists. Finally, he pushed off the pillar, striding toward the two of you.

“Mind if I take over?” He said smoothly. “The lady looks like she’s had enough of your theatrics.”

“Is that so?” He raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t hear her complaining.”

“You didn’t ask,” you said flatly.

Naoya’s smirk faltered just enough to give you a flicker of satisfaction before Satoru stepped between you. “Thanks for warming her up for me, man.”

Without waiting for a response, Satoru took your hand and placed his other hand on your waist, effortlessly guiding you into the next step.

“Jealous much?” You teased him.

“Jealous? Nah. Just couldn’t stand watching him butcher a perfectly good waltz.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. At first, the dance felt awkward. His hand was just a little too tight on your waist, and your steps were slightly out of sync.

“For someone so full of himself, you’re surprisingly bad at this,” you said.

“Excuse me?” He replied, mock-offended. “I’m amazing at this. You’re just distracted by how good I look.”

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that.”

But as the music slowed, and the crowd dispersed, his teasing grin softened. His hand on your waist relaxed as his thumb brushed against the fabric of your dress.

“You didn’t answer me earlier.”

That caught you off guard. You looked up, meeting his gaze, and for a moment, the noise of the room faded into the background.

“You didn't ask.”

The corners of his mouth lifted, not in his usual cocky smirk, but in something gentler, more genuine.

“Well, then, I will. Do you still… you know?”

“You know what?”

“Love me like you did?”

Your feet stopped.

Did you?

Or more than that, should you?

“Is it bad if I do?”

“No, not bad at all,” he smiled.

“Satoru.”

“Hm?”

“Why did you? That day. Why?” You asked him softly the one question you had been dying to ask for three whole years.

“I… Fuck. Naoya, him, I couldn’t—” his hands dropped from your waist, and you flinched a little, moving a few feet back, realizing that your question might have messed your moment up. “Angel—”

“Attention, please,” Naoya clinked a glass loudly. “I have an announcement I’d like to make here.”

The hum of conversation in the room died down as all eyes turned toward him. You and Satoru both turned to look at him.

“This is a moment I’ve been looking forward to all of tonight. All my life, I have wanted nothing more than to serve the woman of my dreams, and tonight, I wish to solidify not only the bonds between our families but also the bond I share with this remarkable woman.”

He turned to you, his smile widening as he reached into his pocket. He strutted towards you. Your blood ran cold as he pulled out a velvet box, dropping to one knee in one fluid motion. Naoya opened the box, revealing a glittering ring) “Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife, Ms Gojo?”

The room erupted into soft gasps and murmurs of approval, particularly from the Zenin elders. You stood frozen, every pair of eyes in the room drilling into you. All of them, all their stares and expectations felt suffocating.

Your eyes looked at Satoru’s and he seemed like he wanted you to say no. You looked at the elders and they all wanted you to say yes. You looked at your mother, and her eyes were glossy, yet you would take that more than anything else at this moment. Because they didn’t have your answer ready for you in them. They wanted to let you choose. 

“I… I don’t—” you were barely audible. Could everyone just look away from you?

The words stuck in your throat. The weight of Naoya’s proposal, the stares—

“I don’t know.”

The collective murmurs grew louder and confused. For a split second, Naoya’s expression flickered. He looked irritated with your answer. But just as quickly, he smoothed it over, standing and pulling you into a light embrace.

He laughed softly and brushed his lips against your cheek. “She’s overwhelmed. It’s a lot to take in, I understand. These things can’t be rushed, can they?” He turned to the crowd, his tone light and reassuring. “She’s just shy, that’s all. I’ll give her all the time she needs.”

Polite applause broke out, and the pressure in the room became unbearable. Naoya’s hand settled on the small of your back, guiding you toward a quieter corner, and you wanted to wrench it away from your body.

But you couldn’t. Your eyes darted to Satoru. He hadn’t moved. His icy gaze was locked on Naoya, his jaw tense, his entire body screaming for you. And yet, beneath the frustration in his expression, there was something else — something raw and unspoken.

Something you recall seeing in your own eyes.

Three years ago.

You finally cornered Satoru in the training courtyard after quite a while of him dodging your presence for the rest of the night. He was leaning against a pillar, arms crossed, staring at a fountain in the middle of the gardens.

“Satoru.” You stepped closer to him. “Why have you been avoiding me?”

He didn’t even glance at you, his gaze fixed somewhere in the distance. “I’ve been busy.”

“That’s a lie and you know it. You’ve been avoiding me like I’m some kind of plague.”

Satoru finally turned to you, and said with a bitter laugh, “What do you want me to say? That everything’s fine? That I’m thrilled about everything that’s happening?”

“You could at least tell me the truth! I don’t understand why you’re acting like this.”

His jaw tightened, his hands curling into fists at his sides. “You don’t understand? Fine. Do you know how hard it is for me to see you with him?” His voice cracked slightly, the anger giving way to something new. “To know he gets to touch you? To see you smile at him like that?”

You froze, the weight of his words hitting you like a tidal wave. “Satoru…”

But he didn’t let you finish. He took a step back from you. “You didn’t even reject him. You stood there, and you let him—”

He stopped himself, his voice breaking off. He looked away, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

“I didn’t know what to do! Everyone was watching, and I—”

“You should’ve said no!” He shouted. The silence that followed was deafening. He stared at you, his chest rising and falling as he tried to rein in his emotions. Then, he whispered quietly, as if about to cry any second. “You should’ve said no.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but the words wouldn’t come.

“I can’t do this anymore.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

The Gojo estate was eerily quiet as you made your way to Satoru’s mother’s quarters. Your heart pounded in your chest. You knocked softly, and her calm voice invited you inside.

Satoru’s mother was seated by a low table, a cup of tea in hand. She looked up, her eyes softening as she took in your disheveled state. “Darling, what’s the matter?”

You sat across from her, your hands trembling as you tried to form the words. You choked a sob. “Did I make a mistake?”

“Mistake?”

“By not saying no to Naoya right away?”

Her expression didn’t waver, but she leaned forward, placing a comforting hand over yours. “You were caught off guard,” she said gently. “Anyone would’ve been overwhelmed in that situation."

Tears welled in your eyes again, and you shook your head. “But now I’ve hurt Satoru. He… he’s so angry with me. I don’t even know how to fix this.”

She sighed softly, her grip on your hand tightening slightly. “Listen to me, dear. Voicing your uncertainty was not a mistake. It’s far better to be honest about your feelings than to make a choice you might regret.”

You wiped at your tears. Her words were comforting, but they were not enough to ease the ache in your chest.

“But what if I choose wrong? What if I lose everything?”

She stood then, moving to sit beside you. She wrapped an arm around your shoulders, holding you, and you took this moment to let it all out. You cried on her shoulder, staining her dress, but she didn’t care. She merely held you and let you cry and scream all you wanted.

“If you choose to marry into the Zenin clan, I won’t stop you. But make sure it’s truly what you want. Not what they want, not what Naoya wants. What you want.” You clung to her, your tears soaking into her sleeve. “As for Satoru…” she smiled faintly. “He’s stubborn, but he’ll come around. He just needs to be reminded that he’s not losing you.”

The school courtyard was quiet that morning. The winter night had forced most of the kids to stay indoors, and the chilly effect of the weather had perhaps drowned out their usual noise. You were lost in thought, replaying the events of the previous evening, when Maki appeared in front of you.

Her stance was confident as always, but her eyes betrayed her. They were rimmed with red, and her face was pale with exhaustion.

“We need to talk.”

“What?”

“I said we need to talk.”

You shrugged and nodded, signalling her to begin speaking.

She took a deep breath in. “Don’t do it. Don’t marry into the Zenin family.” The words came out in a desperate rush.

“Maki, I—”

“You don’t understand. They’ll destroy you. They’ll take everything good about you and crush it until there’s nothing left.”

Her hands were clenched into fists, trembling at her sides. You reached out to touch her arm, but she pulled away.

“I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. The way they treat women, like we’re nothing but tools. They’ll smile to your face and stab you in the back the moment you’re no longer useful.” Her voice cracked, and she stopped, her back to you.

You called her gently. “Maki…”

She turned to face you, tears spilling down her cheeks despite her obvious effort to hold them back. “You’re stronger than me, I know that. But they’ll find a way to break you too. Please… don’t let them.”

The raw emotion in her voice shattered something inside you. You stepped forward and wrapped your arms around her, holding her tightly as she cried into your shoulder.

“I’m so sorry, Maki,” you whispered to her. “For everything they’ve done to you."

She clung to you for a moment before pulling back, wiping at her tears furiously. “Just promise me you’ll think about it. Don’t let them win.”

You nodded, your throat too tight to speak. As you watched her walk away, shoulders hunched against the weight of her past, you couldn’t help but wonder what horrors this brave girl had endured — and what kind of future awaited her if she stayed under the Zenin family’s thumb.

──── ୨ৎ ────

“What the hell are they doing here?” you whisper-screamed to your  mother. Your voice was trembling despite your attempt to sound composed.

The last time the Kamo clan had graced the Gojo estate with their presence, it ended disastrously. More than that, he was here — the face of your nightmares, the man who had haunted your memories for over a decade.

You clenched your hands in your lap, nails biting into your palms as you stared down at the tatami mat, praying for this to be over. But no prayer could save you now. Not when you were practically being forced to bow in front of Kamo Daijiro, the man who had shattered your childhood before it had even begun.

Kamo Daijiro grinned wickedly as he took his seat, his wife Lady Akane and his daughter trailing behind like his shadows. His voice was oily and smug as he broke the silence.

“Ah, the Gojo family. Always full of surprises, aren’t we?” He said mockingly. “First, a marriage proposal with my daughter, Alina, rejected outright by your mother. What a waste of time, huh?”

The room seemed to blur around you. His words faded, replaced by the echoes of the past: the cold stone walls of the basement, the suffocating darkness, the metallic clink of chains binding your wrists.

“Stay quiet,” his voice whispered in your memory. You could feel his hand gripping your arm, dragging you down those steps into hell. Your chest tightened. You blinked rapidly, trying to ground yourself, but his next words yanked you back into the present.

“And now, of course, the Zenin proposal with you.” His gaze landed on you sharply his lips twisting into a cruel smirk. “Two rejected proposals. Not every family is lucky enough to fail so spectacularly, hmm?”

Your heart pounded painfully, the edges of your vision going white. The scars on your fingertips throbbed — perhaps from the rough stones you had used to carve evidences of your torture on the walls of the Kamo estate.

“Sell her,” his voice echoed in your mind. “She’ll fetch a good price.”

The memory hit you like a punch to the gut. You were three years old, crying for your mother, and he was laughing. Laughing as strangers examined you like a product, bartering for your life.

Why did you remember the worst moments of your life?

Satoru’s — no, your mother’s voice broke through the haze. “Speak something sensible or leave, Kamo.” Her words were firm, but you could hear the strain in her voice. She was trying to protect you, but she seemed to realize that even she couldn’t erase the ghosts of the past from your mind.

Kamo Daijiro tilted his head, feigning politeness as he bowed slightly. “Ah, but you should be made aware of what you’ve caused, Lady Gojo. Two lives ruined because of a stupid fantasy between your kids.”

“Enough, Daijiro,” said Satoru’s father.

You blinked, startled by the unexpected intervention. Satoru’s father rarely spoke, let alone in defense of his family. Wasn’t he the one hellbent on getting Satoru married just a few years ago? Perhaps his time in isolation in his room made him realize his mistake. 

“Let me remind you that the Gojo family does not bend to the whims of the Kamo Clan. We never have and never will. So whatever you think, we do not care. Yet you cannot stand here under our roof and speak that way about us, Kamo. Leave.”

Daijiro’s smirk faltered,. The confidence in his posture waned for a fraction of a second. But that moment was enough for you to breathe again. Your mother’s hand slipped over yours under the table, grounding you back to reality, your present away from the horrors of your past.

As Daijiro stood to leave, he glanced at you one last time. His eyes gleaming with a twisted satisfaction.

“You’ll never escape me, little one.”

Beat.

Did he know?

The Kamo family took their leave, but one pair of eyes lingered. Kamo Alina.

She hadn’t said a word throughout her father’s tirade, but now her gaze bore into you, there was something haunted in her expression, something that wasn’t there three years ago when she had tried to charm Satoru out from under your nose.

You didn’t trust it one bit.

You found yourself alone in the garden after the fiasco from earlier. The crisp air nipped at your skin, but it wasn’t enough to shake the phantom memories of The Kamos’ voices echoing in your mind.

A soft rustle behind you made you turn. Alina stood there, her posture hesitant. That was new — gone was the confident, smug girl who used to mock you mercilessly as a child.

“You don’t have the Gojo surname.”

It wasn’t a question. Her tone was quiet, almost confused.

You stiffened, your fingers curling into the fabric of your sleeves. “Why does it matter?”

Her lips pressed into a thin line, and she stepped closer, her hands wringing nervously. “It’s just... strange. You’ve lived with them for so long, haven’t you? And you were even engaged to… you know. Shouldn’t you have their name by now?”

The words cut deeper than you expected. You knew why you didn’t have their name. Why Lady Gojo had never officially adopted you despite raising you like her own. Because your past was a stain that no amount of time could wash away, and your future a fate you wanted to live.

But you didn’t say that. Not to Alina. Not to anyone.

Instead, you crossed your arms, forcing a smirk. “Why do you care? Planning to make fun of me again, like when we were kids?”

Her expression faltered, and for the first time, you saw something genuine in her eyes. Regret. “I…” she paused. “I’m not here to make fun of you.”

You blinked, caught off guard by her tone. It wasn’t what you expected, and that unsettled you more than anything else.

“I just... I don’t understand. Why aren’t you proud to be a Gojo? To have a family like that?”

Because I’m not one of them.

Not yet, anyway, a voice in your head hoped.

But you didn’t say that either. Instead, you looked away, your voice colder than you intended. “You wouldn’t understand.”

She flinched like you had just yelled at her, and her hands dropped to her sides.

Yet, you couldn’t shake the feeling that she might understand, more than you gave her credit for. Because for all her faults, she wasn’t Kamo Daijiro. Or Kamo Akane. Or those auctioners. She wasn’t the one who had abandoned you, sold you off, abused you like you were a piece of meat.

And then it hit you. The thought that had been nagging at the back of your mind ever since you saw her face.

Kamo Akane’s daughter. That was who Alina was. Which made her...

Your half-sister.

The realization made your stomach drop. Your eyes widened at nothing in particular, and your fingers began shaking.

Sister?

All this time, you never gave a thought about it. But it was so obvious, so clear.

Your blood.

The Kamo blood.

You gulped. No, never. Never the Kamo blood. You didn’t want to be associated with the Kamo clan, not in any way.

“I guess you won’t tell me, will you?” Her voice broke the silence, and you glanced back at her. There was no malice in her expression, no smugness, just confusion.

“No. I won’t,” you responded firmly.

She nodded slowly, her shoulders slumping in defeat. “Maybe I deserve that.”

She turned to leave, and for a moment, you almost stopped her.

Almost.

The Gojo estate was unusually quiet that week since the chaos of the Kamo family’s visit was finally behind you. Yet, you couldn’t sleep at all at night. So you did what you always do. You wandered the halls aimlessly, walking from door to door in search of sleep.

You paused outside the study, hearing low voices.

“...I know I failed you, Satoru.”

Your breath caught. That was Satoru’s father.

“I was so focused on the family, on tradition,” his father continued with regret. “I thought I was protecting you, ensuring our legacy would thrive. But all I did was push you toward a life you didn’t want. A life you didn’t deserve.”

Satoru’s response was softer than usual. “You didn’t just push me — you forced my hand. That engagement with Alina... I didn’t even have a say.”

There was a heavy silence.

“I know,” his father finally admitted. “And when your mother stood there and defied me... I hated myself for it. Because deep down, I knew she was right.”

You inched closer to the door. You know you shouldn’t be eavesdropping on this intimate conversation between a father and a son, but you knew you would have stayed awake for a couple more hours if you didn’t hear this completely.

His father sighed with a sound that was weary and old. “I wanted to say this to you for a long time. I’m proud of you, Satoru. Not because of what you are, but because of who you are. Strong, stubborn, and a lot like your mother.”

There was a soft chuckle from Satoru, tinged with disbelief. “Like mother? That’s a first.”

His father continued. “I know I have no right to ask for your forgiveness. But I want you to know, I’ll never stand in your way again. Whatever you choose for yourself, for your future... I’ll support it.”

You could hear the emotion in Satoru’s voice, even as he tried to hide it. “That’s all I ever wanted, Dad.”

Another pause, this one heavy with unspoken words.

“I’m sorry it took me this long to figure it out,” his father admitted.

There was the faint sound of movement, and you imagined Satoru standing. “Thanks, old man.”

You pushed open the door to Satoru’s room a few minutes later. You didn’t expect him to be present there, obviously. He might still be with his father, and you didn’t wish to eavesdrop on their conversation anymore.

Satoru’s room was empty, eerily quiet. His desk was tidy, his bed neatly made. Everything was in its place, except him. You sighed, sitting down on the edge of his bed.

For days, the memory of his half-finished confession had haunted you. The way he’d almost spoken, almost revealed just why he had told you those harsh words all those years ago. Almost. Before Naoya cut him off, of course. Why did he do that? Why did he say that? Why had he pushed you away? You clenched your fists, planning to stay there and wait all night if you had to, just to get the answers of those questions that had haunted you all this time.

The sound of the door creaking open jolted you from your thoughts. Relief flooded you, only to freeze when you realized it wasn’t Satoru standing there.

“Who are you?” You immediately asked.

It was a young woman. She was dressed as if she was a servant of the Gojo clan, but you didn’t recognize her.

“I–It’s me, Princess!”

“Tomoko?” you asked, frowning at the maid’s pale, trembling figure. “From the Kamo clan?” Your eyes widened in realization. “What are you doing here?”

“I... I need to tell you something, Princess,” she stammered. Her eyes darted nervously around the room. Her fingers fidgeted with each other. She couldn’t even look you in the eye. What was she hiding? Why was she here anyway? Something was wrong — terribly wrong.

“What is it?” you asked cautiously, standing up.

Tomoko wrung her hands, tears brimming in her eyes. “I... I poisoned Gojo-sama,” she whispered, her voice barely audible. “Your father, your highness.”

“What?” The word burst from you like a gunshot. For a moment, you couldn’t breathe. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Tomoko flinched, but she continued, her voice shaking. “I didn’t want to do it. I swear on your greatness, Princess! But I was ordered to — by my clan… The Kamo clan.”

The Kamo clan?

Of course, it’s them.

It’s always them.

Your knees felt weak, and you stumbled, grabbing the bedpost for support. “What poison? How long — how long does he have?”

“It’s a rare poison,” Tomoko said, her voice cracking. “They got it from somewhere and had me— had me seal it in his wine. There is no cure. He has days left. A week, at most, Princess.”

The room spun, and anger surged through you. “You poisoned him, and you’re only telling me now?”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Tomoko wailed, falling to her knees. “They threatened my family. And— and me too! If I didn’t do it, they said they’d kill us. I— I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry?” Your voice rose, trembling with fury. “Oh, you’re sorry? And what the fuck do you expect me to say?” She gasped at your choice of words. “You expect me to forgive you for poisoning someone? For poisoning my fucking father?”

“I didn’t know what else to do!” she sobbed, her hands clutching at her chest. “Please, I can’t live with this guilt.”

You stared at her, your hands shaking, your mind racing. Satoru’s father, the man who had finally begun to reconcile with his son, finally, finally begun to relive and make up for all the wasted time, was dying.

And the Kamo clan was behind it.

They had already torn your life apart when you were a child. And now they were doing it again.

Why couldn’t they just leave you alone?

“Get out,” you said, your voice low trembling with barely contained rage.

Tomoko looked up at you, startled. “But—”

“Get out,” you repeated, louder this time. “And don’t ever show your face here again.”

“Please, I—”

“Leave!” you screamed, your voice breaking. “You will only get killed here — by my soldiers or by my hands!”

Tomoko scrambled to her feet, stumbling toward the door. She hesitated for a moment, as if she wanted to say something else, but the fury in your eyes made her think better of it. She fled the room. The door slammed shut behind her.

For a moment, you just stood there, your breaths coming in short, ragged gasps. Then, slowly, you sank onto the bed, burying your face in your hands. Tears stung your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. Not yet. Not until you figured out what to do.

Because another piece of your newfound life was tearing, and no amount of rage or despair could change that.

──── ୨ৎ ────

Ever since that night, you had been hoping, praying even, that whatever Tomoko had said that day was false. That your father was perfectly healthy, and he’d live a long life. But Satoru noticed how his father would stumble on his steps at times. Your mother noticed her husband’s loss of appetite. And overtime, as this worsened, you couldn’t deny it anymore.

Your father was dying.

And that was going to break you.

You hadn’t spoken a word about it to anyone. You should, you knew that. But how? Mother was always too busy fussing over him. Satoru had been avoiding you since that night with Naoya. How were you supposed to say a word?

The hallway outside Satoru’s parents’ room was dimly lit. They had begun sharing rooms again, and you wanted to be happy for them. But this would only go on for about five days longer, you thought ominously. You stood awkwardly near the door, waiting for your mother to emerge. Inside, you could hear her fussing over her husband tenderly.

“Stay in bed, please. The tea is still warm — I’ll bring it to you.” “I’m fine, love,” he replied weakly. “You’re the one who needs rest.”

There was a muffled sound of her setting something on a table, and then footsteps. she opened the door, stepping out into the hallway. She startled slightly at the sight of you, but her face quickly softened when she realized it was you.

“Are you waiting for Satoru? He’s not back yet,” she said, smoothing her sleeves. “No, I—” Your throat felt tight, and you took a moment to gather your courage. “Mother, I need to tell you something.”

Her eyes narrowed slightly in concern, and she gestured for you to follow her into the small sitting room across the hall. She sat gracefully, folding her hands in her lap. You tumbled into your seat, taking a deep breath.

“It’s about Father,” you begin hesitantly.

“What about him?”

“I… I know what happened to him,” you said cryptically. She raised an eyebrow at you, gesturing for you to continue. “One of the Kamo maids, Tomoko… She stayed back after the leaders had left and disguised herself as one of ours. And she told me. That she had poiso—”

“Enough,” she held up a hand to stop you, and you flinched. For a moment, her expression didn’t change. Then she closed her eyes and let out a long, quiet sigh. “I know,” she said softly.

The admission took you aback. “You... you know?”

She nodded, her fingers tightening briefly around the fabric of her kimono. “He told me as soon as he realized. In the past two days, we’ve consulted every healer, every remedy. There’s nothing… nothing that can be done now.” Her voice trembled just slightly, and she pressed her lips together to steady herself.

“Mother,” you whisper.

She waved a hand dismissively, but her eyes glistened with unshed tears. “I should apologize to you for allowing the Kamo clan to enter our lives. I couldn’t protect my family as I should have. I’m a terrible mother.”

You shook your head vehemently. “You’re the best. The best mother and the best leader. And everything else you are.”

“Thank you, darling.” You could see the strain in the smile she gave you, and she looked older in the candlelight.

“But what do we do now?”

Lady Gojo exhaled, leaning back slightly. “Now, my only concern is making his last days as peaceful as possible. If Satoru were to find out...” Her voice broke for a moment, and she looked away as if to compose herself. “It would destroy him,” she continued. “He’s been through too much already. I won’t let this pain touch him — not yet.”

You felt a lump forming in your throat at her last words. “What can I do?”

She smiled faintly, though it didn't reach her eyes. “Just be there for him. When the time comes, he’ll need you more than ever.”

You were pacing outside the garden. Every step crunched against the gravel path. Your thoughts were swirling with your mother’s confession, and her desire to keep it a secret from Satoru. But the last time you had kept something a secret from him, it had resulted in the loss of three years from your life. You couldn’t let that happen again.

But could you disobey your mother? So you had been doing the best thing you could possibly do in that situation — avoiding Satoru all day. But apparently, that wasn’t enough.

“Hey,” his voice startled you as he appeared seemingly out of nowhere. “What’s going on with you?”

You whirled around, clutching your chest. “W-What do you mean?”

He squinted at you, crossing his arms. “This!” He said, as if that explained everything. “You’ve been acting weird. Stuttering, avoiding eye contact, mumbling when you talk to me. That’s not like you at all.”

You forced out a laugh, waving your hand dismissively. “Oh, come on. You’re imagining things.”

Satoru took a step closer. “Don’t lie to me.”

You panicked and shouted. “I’m not lying!”

He narrowed his eyes in frustration. “You can’t even say that without stuttering.” Then he sighed. “Alright, tell me. What’s going on?”

“If you think of me as your sister were all the moments we spent together false or am I overthinking?” You blurted out.

Satoru froze, caught off guard. For a moment, the only sound between the two of you was the rustling of leaves in the evening breeze.

“What?”

“Three years ago,” you pressed, your voice trembling slightly. “At the Kamo meeting. You called me your sister after they had brought up—”

“I know what I said,” he cut you off, his jaw tightening. His hands clenched into fists at his sides.

“Then… why?” you whispered, stepping closer. “Why would you say that? Why would you—”

“Naoya,” he spat venomously.

You blinked, utterly confused. “Naoya?”

He let out a bitter laugh, running a hand through his hair. “That bastard. He...” Satoru trailed off, his expression darkening.

“What about Naoya?”

Satoru hesitated, as if weighing whether or not to tell you. Finally, he exhaled sharply. “He said... things. About you. About what he’d… do to you if we, you know, got closer to each other. And I couldn’t let that happen. He was older, definitely experienced and all of that. I didn’t feel like the strongest anymore when I saw him say that.”

Your breath caught, and a cold chill ran down your spine. “Satoru. When did this happen? What did he say to you?”

“Don’t make me say it,” he snapped, but his anger seemed to be directed more towards Naoya than at you. “It happened right around the time you got detention, I still remember. He had told me he didn’t like how we were with each other. And how I was nothing, pathetic. How I could never protect you from… from him. And he had struck a deal with me that day — that he would stop it all if I was able to convince everyone that we couldn’t... that we didn’t...”

“That we didn’t what?” you whispered.

Satoru met your gaze with guilt. “That we didn’t belong together. That you were like a sister to me.”

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. But he continued.

“And then that day I had found out we were engaged. I was so happy, but also devastated. If that guy didn’t like us then, how would he like it if we got married? So I tried to stop it. Tried to break your heart. Like a coward. Like a fool.”

“Stop it!” You staggered back. “You’re not a coward!”

“Yes I am,” he shook his head. “You don’t understand. I got scared. He was older than me. He knew more. What if he whipped out some charm I didn’t recognize and killed you or something? I’d never be able to forgive myself. Not that I can now either.”

“Satoru—”

“I didn’t deserve the tears you spent on me that time. I didn’t deserve to see you break down. All those times your eyes would brim, my heart would claw at me to stop itself.”

“You don’t mean—” Your eyes widened, and he merely nodded, not looking at you at all.

“I didn’t have a choice,” he said quietly, his shoulders slumping. “But it doesn’t matter now. None of it matters now.”

──── ୨ৎ ────

Satoru’s father’s funeral was held on a chilly afternoon. The air was thick with unspoken grief. The Gojo estate, usually buzzing with life, was eerily quiet. Even the wind seemed reluctant to disturb the solemn atmosphere. The bare branches of trees trembled like fragile fingers.

A sea of black-clad mourners gathered, their heads bowed in respect, but it all felt hollow to you. Each condolence, every whispered prayer, was a reminder of the man who was no longer here, and you couldn’t shake the gnawing guilt in your chest.

You stood off to the side, your hands clasped tightly in front of you, staring at the pristine white casket adorned with lilies. The sight blurred as tears welled in your eyes, but you blinked them away, unwilling to cry in front of so many people. Your grief felt undeserved, selfish even, given the weight of your secret.

You had known about the poison. You knew about the slow and inevitable death of Satoru’s father. You knew, yet you had done nothing, just let it all happen. Could you have stopped it? Could you have saved him? The questions circled in your mind like vultures.

Satoru stood at the front, his back straight. His face seemed like it had been carved from stone. The usual spark in his eyes was gone. It was replaced by a cold emptiness that made your stomach churn. He hadn’t cried, not even once, as far as you knew. You wished he would. You wished that he would let himself grieve, scream, do anything to release the agony he must be feeling. But he was silent, like a statue among the living, and it broke your heart.

The ceremony dragged on. Each passing moment felt heavier than the last. When it finally ended, the crowd began to disperse, murmuring their condolences to Satoru’s mother, who stood like a ghost beside her son. You watched her, too, feeling a pang of sadness at how frail she seemed. 

You wanted to approach Satoru, to say something, anything. But your feet felt rooted to the ground. What could you possibly say that wouldn’t sound as numb as you were feeling? The guilt in your chest tightened its grip, and you turned away, unable to face him.

Back at the estate, the house felt colder than ever. Dinner was a silent affair, just as it had been a few months ago. Because just as the lively chatter had begun to replace the clinking of utensils and the occasional sniffle, it had been snatched away from you.

Satoru’s mother tried to maintain some semblance of normalcy, asking if anyone needed seconds or more tea, but her voice was brittle, and no one answered her with more than a shake of their head. You couldn’t bring yourself to eat, pushing the food around on your plate as you stole glances at Satoru.

He sat across from you, staring blankly at his untouched meal. The shadows under his eyes were darker than ever, and his usually flawless posture was slightly slouched. It was as if the weight of his father’s death had physically pressed down on him. You wanted to reach out, to say something, but the words died in your throat. Instead, you watched in silence as he eventually stood, his chair scraping against the floor, and left the room without a word.

You couldn’t sleep that night. The house was too quiet, the kind of quiet that made every creak of the floorboards and every whisper of the wind feel deafening. You found yourself wandering the halls, your feet carrying you to the room that had once belonged to Satoru’s father. It was untouched, as if he might walk back in at any moment. The faint scent of his cologne lingered in the air, and it made your chest ache.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered into the emptiness, tears streaming down your face. “I’m so, so sorry.”

The days following the funeral were no easier. The once lively Gojo household felt like a mausoleum. Meals were eaten in near silence, and the air was heavy with unspoken grief. You found yourself avoiding Satoru more and more, not because you didn’t want to comfort him, but because you didn’t know how.

One evening, you found yourself in the library, hoping to distract yourself with a book. But the words on the page blurred together, and you couldn’t focus. The guilt was a constant, gnawing presence, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t shake it. The image of Satoru’s father lying in his coffin haunted you, and you couldn’t help but wonder if things would have been different if you had acted sooner.

“What are you doing in here?”

You jumped, the book slipping from your hands as you turned to see Satoru standing in the doorway. His hair was slightly disheveled, and his expression was unreadable. You quickly wiped at your eyes, hoping he hadn’t noticed the tears.

“I just needed some quiet,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

He walked into the room, his footsteps soft against the carpet. He picked up the book you had dropped, glancing at the cover before handing it back to you. “Mother’s calling you,” he said, his tone carefully neutral.

“For?” you asked, trying to sound casual.

“Dinner,” he said bluntly. “You haven’t been eating at all.”

You nodded, and he stood up and left without saying another word.

Dinner that night was a solemn affair. The dining room was heavy with silence, broken only by the occasional clinking of chopsticks against plates. Satoru’s face was blank, his appetite long gone. His mother sat at the head of the table. Her posture was perfectly composed. You sat beside her, feeling like an interloper in this world of quiet mourning. A seat was left empty, for whom, you didn’t have to guess.

The ache in your chest was unbearable, but guilt magnified it tenfold. You had been the one to discover the truth, the one who knew about the poison before anyone else. And yet, you had done nothing.

A soft knock on the door broke the oppressive quiet. One of the maids entered, bowing deeply as she held out a folded piece of paper. “Lady Gojo—” she glanced at her, unsure of how to approach her in her desensitized state — “we found this while cleaning the late master’s study. It’s addressed to you, Princess,” she bowed to you.

The maid extended the letter to you, and you accepted it hesitantly. Your heart immediately sank at the sight of your name scrawled in bold, deliberate handwriting. Satoru’s mother nodded at the maid to dismiss her, then at you.

“Read it,” she said softly. “Whatever he’s written, it’s meant for you to hear.”

You unfolded the paper carefully, your hands shaking as you smoothed it out. The opening lines confirmed your suspicion.

“To my dearest child,

If you are reading this, then it means I am no longer among the living. There are matters I could not speak of while alive, and so I leave them here, trusting you to read with an open heart.”

Your voice wavered as you read aloud. Satoru and his mother both watched you intently. 

“In my absence, I leave behind all that I have built, not as burdens, but as tools for you to continue shaping our legacy.

To my wife, the pillar of my strength, I entrust our estate and all its affairs. She has always been my compass, and I know she will guide our family with the same wisdom and grace she has always shown. To my son, Satoru, I leave my knowledge, my pride, and my unwavering belief in your potential. He is destined for greatness, and though I may not be there to see it, I know he will honor the Gojo name with dignity and strength. So I shall also leave our ancestral blade, a symbol of our family’s strength and honor, along with the records of our techniques and histories.”

To you, my dear daughter, I bequeath the east wing of the estate, yours to claim as a sanctuary and a symbol of your place among us. Furthermore, I leave a yearly stipend from the family’s accounts, ensuring you will always have the means to build a life of stability and comfort.”

But then your voice caught, the words ahead freezing in your throat.

The second paragraph shifted abruptly, no longer a formal testament but a recounting of events that made your blood run cold.

“The past few years I had spent alone were ones spent to find the roots of your journey home, here. I know the pain you carry, and the secrets you keep. I know how you came into this world. Kamo Akane, your mother—”

You stopped reading it aloud, and instead your eyes began darting back and forth the lines as you read it in your head.

Kamo Akane, your mother, made the impossible choice to keep you despite everything she endured. She bore you with strength, but her circumstances were cruel. Kamo Daijiro never accepted you, and he made sure she couldn’t either. When you were only three years old, they both agreed to sell you to the traders of Mizuho.

Your breath hitched. The paper in your hands crinkled as your grip tightened. You couldn’t read further. The memories you had buried deep threatened to overwhelm you. The cold basement. The chains. The voices. The pain.

“What is it?” Satoru asked with concern. “Why did you stop?”

You shook your head, unable to meet his gaze. “It’s nothing.”

“That’s a lie,” he said flatly.

You tried to fold the letter, to hide it away, but your trembling hands betrayed you. Satoru reached out, his fingers brushing against yours as he snatched the paper. “If you won’t read it, I will.”

“No!” you protested, but it was too late. His eyes scanned the words quickly, his expression darkening with each passing second. He reached the part about the traders, and his jaw clenched. His hands shook, but he didn’t stop until he reached the final lines.

I knew about the poison. I knew what the Kamo clan had done to me. But this is not a burden you should carry. You have suffered enough, and I do not want you to feel guilt for something beyond your control.

And Satoru.

Satoru’s eyes flicked to you briefly before continuing.

I know you’re reading this as well. You won’t listen even if I told you this letter is meant for her alone. Satoru, please do not fight.

But the word “fight” was blotched with ink. A tear had smudged the letters. Satoru’s hand hovered over the page, and you realized with a sinking heart that the tear was his own.

He folded the letter carefully, setting it down on the table. His movements were unnaturally calm, but you knew better. The storm was brewing.

“Satoru,” you said hesitantly. “Please don’t—”

He stood abruptly, his chair scraping loudly against the floor. “Mother.” His voice was tight, barely restrained. “May I have your permission?”

“Satoru!”

Satoru’s mother regarded him for a long moment. Her gaze flicked to you, then back to her son. Finally, she nodded. “Do what you must. But remember, no harm is to come to the Gojo clan’s reputation.”

He bowed deeply, his fists clenched at his sides. “Thank you.”

“What?” You stood, panic rising. “You can’t just let him go! This isn’t—”

Satoru’s mother silenced you with a look. “He deserves his revenge.”

You stared at her, incredulous. “Revenge won’t bring him back! It won’t fix anything!”

Satoru didn’t wait to hear more. He left the room, his footsteps echoing down the hall. You called after him, your voice breaking, but he didn’t look back. The door slammed shut behind him, leaving you and his mother alone in suffocating silence.

“How can you…?” you began, your voice trembling with anger and disbelief. “How can you let him do this?”

Her expression softened, but her resolve remained. “Because I know my son. And I know he won’t find peace until he has faced this head-on.”

You sank back into your chair, your hands clutching at your chest as though to hold your breaking heart together. The letter lay between you and Lady Gojo, as if to remind you of everything you had both lost and everything that was yet to come.

──── ୨ৎ ────

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© chuulyssa 2025 - do not copy, plagiarize or repost my works on any platforms. do not translate.

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[salparadiselost]

A random idea that I'm not ever sure I'm going to pick up and finish. AU is that everyone lives in a movie genre and the universe if governed by the rules of that genre. Bruce, fed up with being a failed lover interest, starts to adopt kids from other genres.

-----

"I don't get it," Dick says, standing at the top small set of stairs and looking down them. There's like six of them, hardly enough to actually call it a staircase. Dick could probably jump the full way down without hurting himself. It's definitely not a flight, just six steps to get from the raised dias of the bank's entry to the street. But Bruce is still hesitating at the top, staring at them like they are a snake curled up in the grass. 

The man who had assigned himself Dick's father (He doesn't need a father. He doesn't have parents. His parents are dead. Killed. For eight years, their case has gone untouched as cold as their corpses. He needs to solve it. He needs to find the killer. He has to. He has to. He has to...) drags his eyes from the stairs to Dick.

"You live in a *rom com*," Dick practically spat the words. He had been growing to hate this saturated colour, plastic world. There were too many people. None of the streets were ever empty. Movements from the corners of his eyes that his brain screamed could be someone pulling a gun, someone reached for a knife, someone passing a drug off to another, was usually just a woman dressed in LuLulemon pulling her yappy dog along. It was maddening the way that his brain wasn't built for this. He saw people doing things and his mind screamed that it was clues! It was evidence! You need to investigate it! You need. You need. You need.

But he doesn't. Because he doesn't exist here. The Graysons don't exist here. No one has been killed in this city for over 100 years apparently. The worse crime in the paper had been when Miss Betty accidentally stole cupcakes because her and Joe's orders got mixed up. They were getting married now apparently.

Dick shook his head trying to dislodge the part of him that was screaming that he was missing a clue. He tried to focus on the present. Him. Bruce. Stairs.

"This is a romantic comedy," he repeated. "It's all about love, so what's the fucking worse thing that could happen on the stairs."

"*It seems I've fallen for you*," said Bruce suddenly, his voice so devoid of emotion it startles Dick. Dick's eyes snap up to meet the other man's eyes, but Bruce is still looking at the stairs.

"That's the part of the script," he continues, his voice blank. It's disconcerting. Dick has only heard him peppy or bubbly or other words that paint him as a happy-go-lucky dog. He's never heard... this. "I fall down the stairs and I... I break something. I lay there until she's suppose to rush in. She's supposed to be a nurse or a doctor or maybe just someone with first aid training. She's supposed to treat me until the ambulance comes and I'm supposed to say *'it seems I've fallen for you'*"

Bruce finally looks at Dick and he can't even describe what's in the man's eyes. It's... he would almost call it haunted. The same glint that he has when he stares in the mirror.

"I've broken my leg from falling down stairs 48 times. I've broken one of my ankles 53 times. My left arm 18 and my right 26. Three times it's been my collarbone. One time after two flights, it was my back. I was paralyzed from the neck down. I couldn’t move a damn finger, so I just laid there in pain until the clock hit midnight and everything reset. And that’s just the staircase falls. There’s also the open manholes, the broken railings, getting hit by a car, a couple of times where a bridge gave out from under me. Any of them will do as long as I end up hurt and on the ground."

Dick stared. Coldness washed through his veins, fixing him to the spot. For the first time since he got here, fear settled into the pit of his stomach. The only thing he could think to say was: "I thought that nothing went wrong here?"

Bruce gave a harsh laugh that seemed more fitting for Dick's genre. "Everything works out if you actually have someone who wants to love you. If your love interest isn't interested or she just doesn't bother to turn up... well, the universe keeps trying to correct itself even if that means you have to lay in a crumpled, bloody heap at the bottom of stairs for a few hours."

He... he didn't know what to say. Say that he was sorry? That Bruce didn't have anyone coming to love him?

He looked back at the stairs and saw them how Bruce saw them. He tried to figure out what to say, but Bruce just turned on his heel.

"Let's go find the wheelchair ramp."

[valentine-cafe]

im drooling for some haoyu 9948v ANGST

maybe haoyu getting bored of reader and decides to just. (kill) get rid of them. he's like 'ok whatever not my problem' then sometime after it just SNAP! clicks.

he killed you and now hes not gonna find anyone like you again

˖⁺. ﹙ bloodthirsty phantom  x gn reader. ﹚ .𖹭 ݁

. . . dull eyes !! 🍒 :  phantom ˖ yandere ˖ vngeful spirit character﹙ verse 9948v hàoyǔ. ﹚

you always knew that someone like him would eventually be your demise. what happens when a being such as him gets bored of you ? | cw: reader death 

It had all been nice at first. Well, that’s how you remembered it.

The inafmous phantom of your world, hauntingly beautiful, yet dangerous, murderous. With all the intent to snap anyone’s neck that came in his way. Bathe in their blood.

You remember the first time his eyes landed upon you, the obssessive gazes and the suddeness of when he stole you away. Kept you in his abode for none to see or visit. His beautiful prize. Your soul most addictive to him.

He huffed you like you were a drug to get high on after every murdering spree.

It got to your head that he never once hurt you. No, he protected, kept you safe and sound. Sure, he was and is manipulative but. . . You could manage, you had him, right?

Why should you miss your old family and friends— You are his, and he is yours. He wouldn’t get bored of you.

Alas. As malicious and godlike as he is. His animalistic hunger convinced him otherwise. You weren’t much more than a toy. You weren’t his cerise, nor were you that interesting to begin with.

A past-time soul to take away the boredom.

And when you suddenly no longer took that boredom away — that’s when you noticed the signs, his nonchalance around you. The sudden threats to snap you in half, the agitation he suddenly displayed to you like it. The same he shows to everyone.

What was it you had done wrong? You never really figured it out. An impossible task to do so nontheless.

It was incomprehensible for your mortal brain to understand his.

You lay in bed now, sleeping soundly. Yet to know the fate coming for you.

Oh how the angels weep for it, whichever poor guardian that wards you, begs for you to awake. It is not possible to hear. Not with the barriers of the realms.

And your intuition has been shattered long ago.

The door creaks open. Heavy footsteps moving towards the side of the bed, alongside the strong smell of iron that reeks off of your beloved.

Blood covered fingers trail down your spine, while a freezing pair of lips press against the lobe of your ear. Breath sighed onto your warm skin.

“How unfortunate you cause me such boredom.” He whispers. Might as well take you out in your sleep. The screams may have been delightful. But why not let you dream instead. They say the dead can still hear a bit before their soul has gone away.

Doubtless he will have any use of that either way as well. Perhaps he should simply suffocate it when it floats aimlessly above you. Awaiting reaping.

No reaper comes into this household.

“Hàoyu.” You groggily call, as you rouse from your sleep. Eyes groggy and full of heavy sleep still.

Poor you, barely able to process the teeth that rip out your throat and the long talons that rip through your skin and bones like they are nothing.

What quick and painful death, the blood spraying everywhere. You don’t get to see it, as he so violently tears you apart. Like a feral animal. Laughing as though it is some funny joke to him.

And when it is all over, and he is holding your corpse in his arms. He strokes a thumb across your face and tuts. “Its nothing personal, hm?” A little chuckle rumbles through his chest as he drags you out to the yard, where the rest of his past loves lay beneath the earth.

Yet. As day by day pass by. And he returns from the long sprees with his cultists. He settles down in the lounge of his manor, and awaits your presence each and every time.

A strange feel arises in his chest. Is it sorrow?

No, surely not. . . He was bored, why would he suddenly begin missing? What had been that different about you in contrast to all of his other lovers?

And as a month, perhaps two? What does perception of time matter to him - passes by, it dawns upon him. He was missing you. He was grieving the loss of you of which he bore on his hands. The murder of you.

Waiting, you had been waiting for him to come join you that night. After all of the ruthless threats, ignoring and snapping he had been taking out on you.

Was it boredom? Or had it been the part of him that just thirsted for blood instead?

He no longer knew.

One thing was for sure, you weren’t coming back. Your soul left without a trace after your death. The violent and malicious magic that tore through you suffocated it completely. There is no afterlife for you. There is no you anymore—

And he can try as much as he wants to, to find you again. In every cultist, person he may randomly stumble into. Someone with your eyes, your smile, your laugh, your kindness. But he can’t. Because it isn’t you.

He wants you.

[definitelynotshouting]

saw this post assigning devastating quotes to each life series members, got incredibly inspired, and decided to try my own hand at it but specifically with snippets of the poetry ive personally written throughout the years :] thoughts and musings on several of my choices will be under the cut if you're interested in that sorta thing!! Enjoy<3

Bdubs: "it's all so blue. so blue, so wet, so cold, but you've got a fire in your heart like a hundred rockets. you aren't hungry, but you could eat the dead, / cut your teeth on a rotting corpse."

BigB: "SOMETHING HAS FRACTURED HERE AND IT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN. EACH DAY YOU WILL CHASE THE FAULT LINES LOOKING FOR A BRIDGE ONLY TO FIND IT ALREADY BURNT."

Etho: "I am above myself, hovering, pressing pale fingers into the dull bruise of yesterday to test its lingering ache. Is this all that's left?"

Gem: "what are gods if not the mothers of our own inventions. we are the avatars of violence and love and hope and fear in equal measure."

Scar: "I think I want to live. I know one day, I must die. In the cosmic wheel of fortune, I am a gamble in the making, gentle breath washing a little luck over the dice."

Grian: "Within the shape of my clawed fingers are knives: scrabbled dirt; scarlet lines; the escape route / Between a fence and / Tall grasses."

Impulse: "Life's bitter, stilted offering / Is that every person we meet / Will one day become a perfect stranger."

Martyn: "Dangerous beasts must earn / Their survival. / You are no different than a knife / In the hands of murderers."

Lizzie: "When I think of the egg-tooth, / I revel in purple glass; the lightning; the shatter; the knife-slip between / Death, and a wake."

Mumbo: "This is your life now, / Found in the cracks and crevices, scraps pried between laughter and reckless abandon."

Pearl: "I am begging, raw in the face of absolution— do not hate me. Please, keep watering me in your garden, / Despite how closely my heart resembles a weed."

Ren: "— and sometimes hearts are forged in violence /— and sometimes blood cannot form scabs / — and sometimes wounds carry half-hearted sutures / — and we are all but living fragments / —"

Skizz: "Just a little longer. Please. / There is light pooling at the bottom of the flower vase."

Scott: "I can only hope that with the rising of the dawn / I will pass through darkness and return to day, / Where I am a solar ray blinding— teeth and claws sharpened, the stretch of my skin carrying gold / Above the dull, dug out earth"

Joel: "Tamed by nothing, no one, I lose myself to the shattered chains; / Yes, there is a loss."

Jimmy: "for year after bloody year, i clung to life with aching fingernails, grasped at every straw, took every scrap of double-barrelled hope and shot myself in the chest with it."

Tango: "every time you claw yourself from the ashes you insist it will never happen again. every time you reach the breaking point, it happens a little bit faster."

Cleo: "It's about catharsis, not letting go. / Because a part of me wants to hold this, / A swelling hurt deeper than tides, / Hotter than stars. The kind of rage / A mother might raise against her own child."

I dont share my poetry on here very often, partially because it tends to end up coming from a very personal part of me, but since this was actually a lot of fun maybe i'll start posting my poems more often here :]] i think what i found most interesting about this exercise was that as i scrolled my notes app and cherry-picked quotes for each character, it felt like the ones i chose naturally became part of a larger conversation-- as if the characters were speaking to me through my own words about their lowest points, about their ultimate views on the games filtered through the lens of a red life.

It felt enlightening; i dont often feel like im speaking to characters or being informed about their plots/preferences, etc. the way many other writers discuss in workshops or casually online, but by the end of this exercise i felt like i just... understood them, better than i had before. There's something inexplicable about reading your own words and consciously finding ways to apply them in a way that encapsulates them down to a character's core that just... truly highlights the specific qualities that resonate most with you. And i think stumbling upon that organically was a very vivid and incredible experience for me

Admittedly, i did struggle on Scott, Ren, and Etho a lot-- im not as familiar with them as characters, and for a while i couldn't quite pinpoint what exact themes they tend to carry with them throughout all their life seasons. But when i started to really look at everyone's quotes as a whole, i realized they felt like a story, like the response to a question-- as if i was being TOLD what they felt and how, and that that was how i needed to frame the rest of my selections. So Scott's ended up being about control, and the desperate hanging onto of it; Ren's is about the acceptance and bitterness of what he cannot change; Etho's is a quiet resignation rounded out with softer disbelief. The more i looked at these choices, the more they felt correct to me-- and while i still think i have a ways to go before i fully understand these characters, i feel like this has helped me a lot with that ultimate goal :]

Of all these poetry snippets, though, i think Scar, Skizz, and Joel's are my absolute favorites. Skizz's poem is actually the whole poem in its entirety (as is Cleo's, funnily enough)-- it's a short, very simple poem that is incredibly close to my heart for many reasons, but the main one being because it was written at one of my lowest points a few years back. Its about clawing for hope when there isnt any, and finding even the smallest of beautiful things to hold onto, and begging yourself to keep holding onto that at any cost. The pure, clean beauty of watching light refract through a vase of flowers, and knowing that sometimes, that's all there is to live for-- I felt like that really spoke to Skizz's life series character as a whole: finding the beauty in every tiny thing, no matter how small, and scrabbling for more time to appreciate it.

Scar's snippet comes from a much longer poem of mine about the difficulty of reconciling the idea of a future when you havent had to think of one before (incidentally, Etho's snippet comes from this poem as well). I think out of everyone, this quote encapsulates him the best; i like how it subtly references that inner well of vivacity he draws from that many other characters struggle to find, and how that in turn ties in with the lore that he never died a final death during Secret Life. And i love how it simultaneously manages to encompass the way he utilizes the social game in each season as well-- Scar's an incredibly intelligent social player, and i think the imagery of a gambler breathing their luck over the dice as they cast it, and as he casts himself at others for alliances and enemies, truly does fit him.

As for Joel, the full poem his quote comes from is one im particularly proud of, especially for its final lines. I think, quite honestly, i can let this poem stand for itself in its entirety:

They say transformation is letting the light in, But in my mind it's a violence. A coarseness, a fracturing, the bloody vowels between a scream And a howl. How do you transform without killing yourself? When I am a lion, my hands and feet Grow claws; my teeth sharpen. No longer do I spark— I ignite. Tamed by nothing, no one, I lose myself to the shattered chains; Yes, there is a loss. To transform is to leave behind a body And eat its still-breathing corpse.

I find myself referencing this poem a lot even in my daily life-- as longterm readers of mine already know, one of my favorite themes is that of replacing yourself and permanent transformation. This poem really is just about how changing, in any shape or form, alters you forever; how you can look back on yourself from even just a few months ago and feel like a completely different person despite remaining the same. Connecting it with Joel's character, and how he acts during his red lives in each season, was a natural and intuitive progression once i really sat and thought about it.

Alright thats enough yapping from me 😂😂😂 im not used to writing meta nor delving into my poetry on here, so this was a bit of an experimental post for me. If youve read up until this point, i both applaud your patience and really hope you enjoyed this window into my personal works and thoughts on them :]] cheers, and thanks to @/chipperchemical the op of the original post for inspiring me!!!❤️❤️❤️

[cavegirlpoems]

cavegirl banging out the designs

Spectres A spectre is a magical girl who has given in to sadness, growing numb to the mundane world and disconnecting entirely. As her disassociation grows, her spirit slowly separates from her body until it splits off entirely. As her spirit finally emerges from her flesh, her body is left behind, seemingly having died tragically and young. Deaths of despair - overdose, suicide, heart attack - are typical, leaving the magical girl’s survivors to process the sudden shock of grief. And, invisible to them, a Spectre emerges from the magical girl’s corpse, her spirit blossoming out into something huge and alien, embodying the magical forces that pulled her from the world of flesh to begin with.

Becoming A Spectre After a Magical Girl has taken four advances, she can begin Metamorphosis to become a spectre, by taking the Numb Detachment optional ability: Numb Detachment: You’re able to shrug off entanglements with the material world. Whenever you’d be given a Condition, or somebody would get a String on you, you may ignore it. If you do, take a point of Numbness. When a Magical Girl’s Numbness plus her Strain equal twenty or more, her body dies, and her spirit emerges from it to become a newly-bloomed Spectre. Play out a scene where this happens. Decide what expression is on her face as her body dies; is it pain, peace, anticipation, triumph? Thereafter, the magical girl is now a Spectre. You can keep playing her.

Playing as a Spectre A spectre player character loses her Mundane persona entirely. Remove that playbook entirely, including your Name and Backstory. Your stats remain exactly as they were. You lose any Special Abilities from Mundane playbooks. You cannot use Mundane moves at all unless you have a Magical special Ability to do so in your Magical persona. Your Soul Jar is absorbed into your intangible form, and part of you. You no longer need to worry about protecting it or being separated from it. A spectre is a being entirely made of magic, with no physical presence. You cannot take material actions, and can only influence the material world via your magic. You can now use Primordial Moves. You can now spend points of Numbness. Each point of Numbness can do one of the following: ◆ Be treated exactly like it was a point of Momentum. ◆ Reduce a dice roll against you by 1. While your Numbness is lower than your Strain, you are Suffering. Treat it as a Condition that you can never lose. While your Numbness is higher than your Strain, you are Dreaming. Treat it as a Condition that you can never lose. If your Strain ever reaches 15, and you would pass out, it resets to 0, and pain briefly overwhelms you. Reduce your Numbness by 5. If your Numbness ever reaches 0, your essence is torn apart by the force of your raw emotions, without the shield of flesh or numbness to protect yourself. You come apart entirely and cease to be. Make a new character to play.

[anjelicawrites]

“Don’t go beyond, no matter how much you feel you need to, Doctor. The barrier was not made to be broken. Remember this: there is more power here than you know. It is old and always restless. Remember.”

― Stephen King, Pet Sematary 

Paring: Aemond Targaryen x dead wife!reader Synopsis: expanding this short fic based on Stephen King’ Pet Sematary. Aemond is the sole victor of the Dance, only to discover that his beloved wife has been killed. Desperate, and in spite of Alys Rivers’s warnings, he decides to fly to a place where it’s said the dead can be resurrected. There’s always a price to pay, and no one comes back the way they were. Warnings: angst, murder, gore, semi graphic description of a corpse, semi graphic description of injuries, quick reference to Luke’s death, Jahaerys’s death and Rook’s Rest, madness, Aemond survive the God’s Eye, self inflict wounds. A/N: reader is AFAB, they/them pronouns used when needed.

Rain slaps his face, relentless it pours from the sky, chilling him to the bone, wetting the layers of leather, and his thick cloak.

Under him Vhagar flies, restless. For the first time in all these years together, Aemond feels the unwillingness of the ancient beast to follow her rider’s orders; he knows it’s not the storm, nor the exploding boom of the not so distant thunders. 

Or your dead body wrapped in your shroud, that unnerves the Queen of all Dragons, the winner of thousands battles. 

It’s where he’s forcing her to fly.

NSFW (due to the themes) and 18+ only please!

Through the bond he feels Vhagar’s unwillingness, all her instincts screaming that there’s danger ahead, that she shouldn’t go; Aemond feels it in his bones, in every cell of his body that Vhagar is trying to subtly gain control and turn back to King’s Landing. His muscles spasm and flex when the old she-dragon tries to push, against his unbreakable will, his hands tighten painfully around the reins when she tries to sneakly change the course of their trip.

“Daor bisa jēda, Vhagar!” He screams over the howling of the wind. “Not this time, Vhagar!”

In his arms your body slumps and he almost loses his hold on you: it would be the Gods’ cruelest of tricks to take you away from him, again. Permanently, this time.

They had tried, when he was in Harrenhal and you, supposedly, safe in King’s Landing, with his mother and his sister.

Supposedly.

Alicent never wrote him who had smashed your head with a morning star, the blow so violent it had caved your skull in, killing you on the spot. Not that it mattered. Had it been Rhaenyra herself, or one of her men, it wouldn’t have changed a single thing: you were dead. He had survived Daemon, killing him above the God’s Eye, the thought of crawling back in your arms the reason he hadn’t succumbed to the wounds the other man had inflicted.

And the cruel Gods had taken his safe haven away from him.

Aemond has no recollection of what had happened after he had read the letter, there was a black abyss where his memories should have been, and pain, enormous, all encompassing, deafening in its power, it had bent and twisted his reason, smothering him under a layers of guilt: if he had taken you to Harrenhal, you’d be alive and well.

When his reason had resurfaced, forcing him back to the world of the living, he had entertained the fleeting thought of following you into the great unknown; perhaps, he had mused, he was supposed to die in the treacherous waters of the God’s Eye, if not on Daemon’s sword, then by his own hand.

What was left for him? The conqueror’s crown, now that his brother was dead? The richest hidden in the bowels of the Red Keep? Punishing all of the Houses who had sided with Rhaenyra? Everything paled if you weren’t by his side, all the gold turning into dust, if he couldn’t share it with you.

You were the light, where he was darkness, the gentleness to his steel: no one else would ever survive the comparison to you. Nobody would laugh softly the way you did, or feel when he needed your gentle hand in his. Why would he bother with talking to all those people who weren’t you? No one had something to say that truly interested him, nor could they understand him the way you did.

Without you the air he breathed was poisonous, the food ash in his mouth: why did the Gods punish him the way they did, when his only fault had been protecting his family and avenge his honor?

When he had resurfaced back from the pit abyss grief had carved for him, his chambers were destroyed: the bed, the drapes, the heavy trunks containing his belongings. All his clothes torn to shreds. 

The exquisitely made letter writing set you had gifted him for his nameday laid into broken fragments where his desk stood. The elegant clothes you had ordered for him, where you had sewn his initials during interminable winters, before your wedding, torn apart as if a mindless beast had gone through them. Even all the letters you wrote him, now shreds, your beloved handwriting lost forever.

When he had realized what he had done in his rage and grief, he had felt his mind slipping again, the tenuous grip he had on reality splintering as he desperately tried to hold on his sanity: you were dead, and all the markings of your earthly passing destroyed: what was left for him to hold on?

He had fallen on his knees, the boulder sitting on his chest depriving him of his breath, his vision a dark tunnel; even the physical pain of his wounds couldn’t tether him back to reality.

There’s a dark place, his broken mind had supplied, the nameless islands the maids talk about, where miracles happen.

He had forced his jumbled thoughts to focus, gritting his teeth and curling his hands into fists, the pain a flash that sharpened his mind, finally, into focus and away from madness.

He had heard the servants scurry and whisper around him, ghost tales, mad tales that had no grounds in philosophy, or reality, those ignorant people who would pale at gusts of wind they believed to be the shadows of the dead or fear the depths of the woods around the cursed place that was Harrenhal.

Could they be right?

The sharp turn Vhagar tries to make jumbles Aemond back into the present, where wind and hail slap his face and he is so cold he can barely force his muscles to work.

With a pained wince he grabs the brindles with stiff fingers, the muscles of his shoulders screaming when he rears back to force Vhagar to go straight.

“Gaomagon hae nyke vestragon! Do as I say!” He shouts; through the bond, Vhagar growls, but submits.

Only another time Vhagar had gone against his will: the faithful night when he had killed Lucerys.

He had laid in your embrace, still wet from the storm, shivering, his teeth chattering with how cold he was feeling. He had poured his heart open to you, confiding to you the truth he couldn’t reveal to the rest of his family: that he didn’t mean to kill the young man, that Vhagar had a mind of her own.

He had curled in your arms when he had told you he couldn’t feel any remorse for what he had done that, perhaps, Vhagar had acted following the deepest wishes of his soul.

“Maybe there was a part of me that wanted him dead, and Vhagar just followed suit.”

You had hugged him closer, wetting your night garb in the desperate hope to keep him warm, as the servants prepared him a bath.

“We will face what is to come together. We are but instruments for the Gods, their path for us is known only to them.” You had answered.

Only you had been steadfast by his side, even after Jahaerys’ killing, even after Rook’s Rest, when the whole Keep thought he had tried to murder Aegon, you had taken his hand showed him your faith in him.

You did all of that for him, he must do the same for you, against reason, against all that’s known about life and death.

He had stormed the crumbling corridors of the castle, scaring the servants away with the mad look on his face, and the blood still dripping from his hands, outside, Vhagar moved and groaned, his turmoil hers to bear.

He had opened the doors of the witch’s workroom with such a strength, that they had slammed with a bang against the moldy walls, scaring her servants into scuttling into the direction of the enormous hearth.

Once again he had looked at the Strong woman, the only one who showed him no fear, only bland curiosity; he knew of her friendship with Daemon and only now wondered why she hadn’t killed him when he was defenseless in the mouth of madness. Perhaps she hoped to obtain from him what she had wanted from her late friend, as if Aemond would have given her half a glance, whatever the reason of her well masked interested had been in him.

A mystery he would have explored, if you weren’t in his life.

She had tried to say something, but he had cut her off immediately, asking where was the place of miracles, and she had paled: for the first time since he had set foot in Harrenhal, she had showed him true emotions, the fear she lacked when he had decimated House Strong.

“Such place does not exists.” She had lied to him. “It’s an old wives tale.”

Without even thinking, Aemond had grabbed both the knife she was using, and her hand, pulling at her until he could slap it on the table, her long fingers spread on the dark wood.

“Either you start talking, or I start cutting off your phalanxes. I will not stop until only bloody pieces of you remain.”

Did she talk because she was afraid of him, or because she knew she had no sway over him? Could she see the madness in his eye, or was she sending him to his death, to avenge Daemon? Aemond didn’t know, or cared; with the sharp blade resting on the tip of her little finger, he had listened to her, absorbed the coordinates that would guide him towards your salvation.

She had waited until he was at the doors.

“It is said that nobody comes back the way they were, that there is a price to pay to subvert the order of all things.”

He had stopped, but he had not looked at her.

“Then why such a place should exist?”

She had no answer.

“You wouldn’t like what you’ll see there.” She had stopped for a moment. “Sometimes, dead is better.”

He wasn’t listening anymore, his footsteps booming against the cursed walls of Harrenhal, his voice authoritative as he ordered his servants to prepare his things, and Vhagar: he was in a hurry to go back to King’s Landing, to you, before it was too late.

A flash of lightning illuminates the barren, nameless island and Aemond has to grind his teeth when, under him, Vhagar grunts and jostles her whole body, as if trying to stop him one last time, before it’s too late.

“Ȳdra daor keligon! īlon issi bē konīr! Don't stop! We are almost there!” He shouts: he’s not going to fail now that his prize is so near!

Vhagar lands gracelessly, like she has never done before, and doesn’t lay on the sand to recuperate after such a long flight, instead she sits, and keeps looking around, moving her humongous head nervously.

Cradling your body against his, Aemond feels all his hairs stand up, as soon as his feet touch the ground. If he hadn’t such an important task to carry out, he would follow the voice in his head that’s screaming at him to run away, before it’s too late.

With a grunt he tries to ignore the panic he feels surging from the depths of his being, the fist that’s curling around his stomach, making it hard to take the first step towards the inland, where the ancient burial ground lays: his body seems to revolt against his brain’s orders, his legs almost hammered on the wet sand, his muscles turned into stone.

Behind him, Vhagar roars.

He had arrived in King’s Landing wearing the same bloodied clothes he had worn during the battle against Daemon. He had ignored his mother’s fearful stare, and her pitiful attempt at stopping him, when she had realized he was heading for your burial.

“No Aemond!” She had grabbed his arm. “You don’t want to see them like this, you don’t want to destroy your last memory!”

He hadn’t stop to shake Alicent’s hand off his arm, electing to carry her until she had lost her hold on him.

You were already in your tomb, the soil flattened and only needing a headstone, as per your House ancient traditions.

With his bare hands he had dug through the layers, the already butchered skin opening to bleed, his fingernails almost torn with the haste that fueled his desperate work.

Until the linen of your shroud appeared. Only then he worked carefully, making sure the soil wouldn’t rain on you, moving your heavy body gently, with the same care and love he had always used with you, his delicate love.

His hands had trembled when he had open the shroud to see your beloved face again hoping, against all hopes, that you would open your eyes, and smile at him, the same way you did every morning, when he was getting ready for the day.

The Maesters had done a good job at trying to put together the broken pieces of your skull and of your eye socket; there was still a dip in your skull, probably where the morning star had hit you; he could touch the stitching keeping your skin together and the bald patch, where your hair used to be. The eye on the damaged side slightly bulged out, as if it didn’t perfectly sit in the socket; it didn't matter, none of it truly did, he’d love you in any shape and form. 

The rest of your face was you, though, even in the endless slumber of death, he could recognize the peaceful expression he used to wake up to every morning, the elegant curve of the lips he loved to kiss, the light laugh lines that showed the world how much you loved life.

He couldn’t fool himself, you weren’t truly asleep, you were dead, too cold and still for this to be anything else but the end of your life.

“We had to bury them.” Alicent had said. “We couldn’t wait any longer.”

Aemond wasn’t truly listening, he didn’t care that they thought you were gone forever, because he had the chance to bring you back.

With infinite care he had wrapped you back in the shroud, hesitating for a second when he had to cover your face again.

“Only a little while longer, issa jorrāelagon, my love.” He murmured against your lips, leaving a fleeting kiss that chilled him to the bone. “You have to be patient for a little longer.”

He had paid no mind to his mother’s voice, at her words when she had seen him carry your body bridal style away from your tomb.

She had tried to scurry behind him, to keep his pace, but he was already sitting on the saddle of his horse, with you safely in his arms, when she had managed to reach him.

“We shall be back.” He had told her, not seeing the pure horror on her face. “And everything shall go back to normal. Prepare for our coronation. It shouldn’t take me too long.”

Around him the servants and soldiers, the stable hands and maids tried not to look at him, fearing his reaction and made way when he had headed for Vhagar again.

Aemond has to walk half blinded by his hood and the fury of the elements around him, on his back he had strapped the shovel he had ordered the servants to ready for him, in his arms your shroud is wet and heavy with all the hail and rain pelting both your bodies.

For a fleeting moment he wishes he could protect you more from the storm, that the clothes you will wake up wearing wouldn’t be soaked; he should have bought something else for you to wear, than the wedding dress you were buried in. You can’t feel the cold that’s seeped in his bones, you will be shivering during the ride back though; he hopes his mother will have the fire ready in your shared rooms, it would be useless to bring you back, only to lose you to a stupid illness.

Under his boots the terrain starts to rise in a slope that becomes steeper and steeper as he trudges along; around him the wind howls and a part of him fancies he could hear the screams of ghosts trying to stop him from doing what’s right, what he couldn’t do when you were defenseless in King’s Landing.

“Nyke jāhor daor qringaomagon arlī! I will not fail again!”

He howls, and the dead steal his words, shred them into pieces carried by the wind. On the inside he shivers, and it’s not the cold, it’s not Vhagar’s uneasiness he can still feel in his mind; it’s the animal living inside of him, the instinct that had told him not to strap himself to Vhagar, in preparation to his fight against Daemon.

There’s a knot where his stomach is, all of the fine hairs on his body stand to attention as he almost loses his hold on you; there’s a part of his mind whispering old, dark tales his nanny used to tell him to scare him, that sees monster in every shadow painting this derelict place.

Is someone walking behind him?

He whips around and all he can see are the black clouds shielding the sky: there’s no one else but him here, and the little light the moon can bestow to show him the way.

By the time he arrives on the top of the hill, he can’t feel his feet anymore, nor his hands, his teeth are chattering violently, all his muscles are trembling, and it’s not the cold, or the strain of the walk against a wind that’s still trying to topple him backwards.

It doesn’t matter: if the witch’s words are true, he’s arrived where he’s supposed to be, the land that will, miraculously, bring you back.

He loathes that he has to lay you on the sparse, wet grass, but he has to dig now.

“Nyke jāhor daor qringaomagon ao arlī. I will not fail you again.”

He murmurs against your lips, the shroud is so wet not that it sticks against your face, revealing the vague shape of your lips and closed eyes.

“Sepār syt mirrī while, pār īlon jāhor sagon biare arlī. Just for a little while, then we will be happy again.”

His whole body screams in pain when he starts digging the hard terrain. No amount of training has prepared him to the physical exertion that is driving the shovel against what feels like rocks, their weight as he throws the soil away in a haphazard pile away from where you lay; his arms are as stiff as stone, his hands can barely grasp the handle, slippery in his dead fingers. It’s only his obstinacy that keeps him going, even when he falls on his knees, the pain of his back taking the breathe away from him for a handful of seconds.

Tears mixed with rain wet his face as he keeps working with his hands now, desperate he keeps digging. If he’s bleeding, he doesn’t feel it.

On his hands and knees he crawls to you, the pain in his lower back and arms almost unbearable when he has to lift you; it doesn’t matter, he will not drag you around like a dead animal.

He staggers to the hole blindly, all of his muscles screams at him, the hail is pelting his uncovered head. He trips against a rock and falls in the temporary burial with you, your corpse deadening the fall; amidst the pain and the stench, he wails how sorry he is, that he didn’t mean it, the same way he didn’t think that leaving you behind would kill you.

On his hands and knees again he fills the hole. He’s burning through whatever sliver of strength he has left, he uses it to cover your body, until the soil is compact again, and he can crawl back to the beach: the witch had be adamant that the miracle should work in solitude, that you should raise from your tomb alone.

He doesn’t care that he mostly rolls and crawls down the slope, he’s too tired to notice how the rocks and sparse bushes tear at his face and clothes, he just wants to go home, with you.

Vhagar is still sitting on her haunches, her massive tail whips the sand nervously, yet she simply lifts one of her wings to protect him from the rain, and lets him abandon his tired body against hers, guarding his uneasy sleep.

In his dreams he keeps chasing you. He doesn’t know where you two are, you’re running through a dead forest, the skeletal branches of the trees grab at his clothes and hair, making it hard for him to catch you, no matter how hard he tries; sometimes he loses the sight of you in the mist, sometimes you’re so close to him, yet your slip through his fingers like air. He knows there’s danger ahead, but you wouldn’t listen to him, you keep running and laughing, egging him on, until he sees the glint of the morningstar: it’s too late.

He wakes up with a scream, confused by his surroundings and by the nightmare, then he remembers everything with a pang of pain in his chest: how long was his uneasy slumber? Above him Vhagar is still nervous, her own alertness seeps into his conscience and makes all the hairs on his body stand.

Still on his hands and knees he crawls out in the open, in his bones he feels Vhagar’s unhappy growl, and her mad desire to take to the skies. Not yet: he’s here for a reason, now his only fear is that the witch might have lied to him, and that you’d be gone for good.

He doesn’t know how he looks now, probably as bad as he feels, his body stabbed by pain with every small movement he makes. Even climbing back to his feet is a feat he can only manage by using Vhagar’s massive body for support and still he can’t extend his back in his usual ramrod stance, the lower portion of it hurting so badly he has to hunch a little.

Over him the sky is still a blanket of dark clouds that let slivers of moonlight through: he shouldn't have slept for too long, then.

The Gods must have blessed him because the storm has calmed and now there’s only an ice cold wind whipping his broken body; anxiously his eye starts scanning the beach, looking for you. How long does it take for a miracle to happen?

“Aemond.”

Fear bolts down his back as he turns around, facing the path he had taken to the slope.

“Aemond.”

It’s your voice calling him, yet all his instincts are screaming that he needs to run away.

Aemond forces himself to stay where he is, his eye trained on your approaching figure.

You’re walking with a slower gait than the one he’s used to, your wedding dress is in tatters and the wind slaps the flying scraps of fabrics against your body. Your, once, beautiful hair is now a ruined mess of blood and soil, the tresses hung down your back like dead things.

And your face.

He’s forcing himself not to look at you, to keep his eye trained away from what he had loved to look at the most. He can’t. He knows he’ll be turned into stone if he dared.

“Did you miss me, Aemond? I did. You were gone for so long.”

Unconsciously he takes a step back, trying to retreat back into Vhagar’s safe embrace: your voice is so wrong. It’s not the tone, not the lilt of your accent, but there’s something… off.

“I waited for you. Prayed the Gods that you’d be back. Did you to the same for me?”

He did. Every night spent away from you had been a torture he survived thanks to the hope to get back to you. He even came here because the idea of living without you was too repulsive to even form in his mind.

I don’t want to that thing to touch me. He thinks, with horror. I would die if that happens. Then why can’t he scramble on Vhagar’s back and fly away? Why are his feet planted on the barren shores of this nameless, cursed place?

“Don’t you want to hold me close, Aemond? I was so cold without you where I was.”

No! No! No! No! His mind screams. Behind him, Vhagar is growling, her fear, new and petrifying mixes with his own. Yet you’re approaching, unstoppable like a bad omen, your feet carry your undead corpse closer and closer.

There was a price to pay, the witch had said. No one comes back the way they were.

He had been a fool in bringing you here in the hope to restore his life the way it had been. A cursed fool, now he understands! That thing uneasily walking towards him is simply wearing your body, is using your voice, it’s not you, it’s a puppeteer, ancient, more than Old Valyria ever been. Perhaps the thing had been cursed to live here, and he has freed it, perhaps it’s Death itself that’s finally come to collect his cursed soul. Perhaps it’s the witch’s revenge.

Oh Gods please no! His mind begs, but you’re not stopping, you’re so close he can smell the stench of death coming from you: why hadn’t he before?

He can’t help but look into your eyes, dead and so, so cold, like they’ve never been before, they put him under a cursed spell that cancels everything around him: the wind, Vhagar’s fear, his own. There is a hell staring back at him, inescapable and that he has bought upon himself with his own desperation.

A pained whine escapes his lips when your ice fingers brush his cold cheeks, and then there’s the abyss of madness overtaking him, once again, and forever.

Aemond taglist: @fan-goddess, @xcharlottemikaelsonx, @qweencrimson

Ewanverse taglist: @vhagar-balerion-meraxes @zaldritzosrose @thought--bubble

[an0nwr1tes]

DP x DC idea, post AGIT

So, Bad ending Parent route for Danny when his foks find out he’s phantom which triggers the usual OH ANCIENTS YOU HAVE TO DIP NOW DANNY but, instead of it being Danny revealing it to his parents or his parents finding out by accident it’s Vlad who’s revealed it, completely by accident mind you, so now it’s Danny and Vlad who are on the run and have to jump dimensions because the Fentons definitely went to the GIW after finding out that not only is their SON a ghost but so is their oldest friend?

The GIW proceed to reclaim all of Vlad’s business’s and property’s meaning they find out about the clones and sure Vlad might have stuff set up to blow should someone who isn’t a halfa or already in the know find out about it but there’s no way Vlad just ignored Dani after AGIT and what about Dan? Those were his fail safe body’s but he can’t just kill the GIW because he’s not just recovered so suddenly the Government and fentons find out that there are TWO MORE HALFA’s or ghosts puppeting human corpses as far as their concerned which means all four halfa’s are on the run!

So one thing leads to another and they decide as a group to just jump ship, they get to the ghost zone but as nothing can ever go right for them they get attacked and after months/weeks? Of constantly fighting the GIW and having their names and faces plastered on very screen in the world they’re all too weak to properly fight back and so they run again.

Danny finds a portal and decides that anywhere is better than here and dives in the others following, now their are in the DCU.

So where do they end up in? Gotham of course, and no this isn’t just because I want the Bats to go; who are these skrunkaly children and feral raccoon man?? But because objectively Gotham is one of the best places for them to be when none of them have ID’s or social security numbers or like….anything at all.

So they arrive but nothings going right, Dan and Dani’s clone body’s haven’t stabilised, Danny’s powers are on the fitzs and Vlad just flat out can’t go ghost after he took some really bad hits form the GIW and Fentons to keep the younger less durable Halfa’s safe.

Now here’s where the fun starts, Vlad isn’t willing to live in poverty but he doesn’t have enough powers to properly build back his empire, Danny refuses on principle to overshadow people and do the other morally incorrect things Vlad does for fun, Dan would do it he’s destabilising so there’s no way he can survive overshadowing someone with this body melting and him being stuck out of time line again and Dani’s just too weak at the moment to really understand what’s happening.

For the Dani bit it’s because the other Halfa’s are all complete, Dan is a full ghost so even if his body melts they just need to get a storage device to keep him till they can make another, Danny and Vlad are weaker but their body’s are fine as true Halfa’s can be so Dani is the first priority.

Now I see this going two ways, Vlad uses persuasion(using the power of suggesting, literally he just went: you want to give us this apartment, the guy: I want to give you this apartment) and then Dani and Danny stay at home so Danny can try and start stabilising her while Dan and Vlad get to work on their criminal empire.

Eventually this gets back to the bats and they decide that Vlad and Dan are the main perpetrators and are keeping Danny and Dani prisoner and forcing Danny to make them weapons and machines by threatening her sister, which would make it hilarious if after they’ve stabilised Dani she takes one look at the bats and goes: I am SO going to mess with them! and goes full super villain.

The second way (AKA; the funnier way) is if Danny has to help stabiles Dani and Dan so Vlad is the one left to go about things but he’s weaker so they don’t get an apartment and Danny is stuck feeding their cores his own ectoplasm in whatever abandoned building they’ve squatted in for the night while Vlad grumbles and runs around attempting to steal things and not doing a very good job at it.

The reason I think this is the funnier option is because in my head, Dani and Dan make themselves look smaller, kinda de-age but their both still them, so that Danny doesn’t have to expend as much energy meaning that the Bats chance upon this group of what looks like a father and his trans-son (because Jazz SO gave that idiot enough thearapy that he isn’t as easily misunderstood as he used to be) and like two very young children and the whole family kinda goes; ….we have to help them

This is also funnier(and this is the main point) because the way that help would definitely be trying to convince Vlad to get a job at WE after Danny let’s it slip that Vlad’s an engineer, which he is case and point the GIANT LAB UNDER HIS CASTLE, and Vlad will be suffering because he DOES NOT want to work for some billionaire but they also need stuff to stabilise Dani and Dan and Danny can’t keep doing it because he’s so weak after expending this much energy that Vlad genuinely thinks he could die, ghost self and all and has to reluctantly agree.

Feel free to use this however, just tag me if you do ok?

[bwat5-blog]

My Hero: Arcane Fanfic

(Rough attempt at a scene I like to imagine went down in 2x05 behind the scenes)

The dim light shifted lazily with the creaking and groaning of the squalid little apartment. Jinx moved softly, not daring to risk waking Vi in this state. She had been coming to the pits for weeks since she found her… trying to work up the nerve, trying to figure out how to approach her. But she was afraid. Their last meeting hadn’t exactly gone well.

At first, she had been able to pretend there was some sick amusement to be found. Cast out by her trigger-happy Piltie girlfriend, left all alone after putting on the uniform, Violet was back where she belonged. In the muck with her people, covered in blood and sweat… but it wasn’t that simple. Jinx knew that after only the first fight.

She’s giving up…

She had watched Vi decline over the last few weeks, getting slower, not protecting herself. She went down. Hard. Almost every night. She was only making enough to fund her next drink and barely eating. She was killing herself… and all the Zaunites around her didn’t lift a fucking finger to help. Jinx had been planning on revealing herself the next time she came down anyway… and now Vander…

We have a chance… maybe we can… we can fix this…

So it was that she found herself holding her breath… until she had crept close enough to see Vi fully. Her stomach dropped, and she forced a hand into her mouth, biting down to keep from crying so hard that she drew blood.

Vi looked like a corpse. She was pale and drawn, still muscular but… not healthy. Her hair was crusted with thick black grease paint and what Jinx could only assume was dried blood. Her face, disturbed even in sleep, was a mess of white and black grease paint and bruising. She wore only black leather pants that were fraying and dirty white wraps around her chest.

“I’m sorry, Vi… I should have come for you sooner,” Jinx whispered, wiping tears away.

She looked around at the trash and empty bottles of booze and shook her head, kneeling down. She took a deep breath and started to move to gently touch Vi but stopped. This was the first time she’d really been this close to Vi without a fight or something else happening… the first time in years. She looked down at her older sister’s body clothed only in the wraps and leathers and had to choke down a sob of horror.

Vi’s body was covered in scars. She had taken plenty of licks as a kid, sure, but… her flesh was a tapestry of abuse and pain. Years of torment played out over every inch of her worn but still muscular frame. Far beyond the wear and tear of Vi’s childhood or even the meat grinder of the Undercity fighting pits. Vi had been tortured.

Jinx scrambled back quietly into a corner of the room, hugging her knees to her chest and biting down hard on a strip of leather from her cloak to keep from sobbing out loud. She shuddered, trying not to wake Violet, as she heard her voice from that day they first saw each other again:

“I tried to come back, I promise I did, but… I got arrested.”

Vi’s voice echoed in her mind.

Seven years… seven years in that goddamn place. Jinx gritted her teeth and tried not to scream. She thought back to Vi begging her to come with her, to just pick up and go. Telling her she loved her and how sorry she was. Sorry for what?! Getting kidnapped and thrown in a place where they did that?!

Jinx curled up tight and bit down on the leather so hard she was afraid her teeth would shatter. She remembered Vi’s hand on her cheek when they were little. Telling her how strong she was, how she couldn’t lose her…

Finally, she was able to stand slowly, wiping her eyes. She walked forward carefully, making sure not to step on anything that would wake Vi before she was ready. She looked to the dingy little cracked mirror on the wall and saw a black stick of grease paint, smiling sadly as she picked it up and whispered:

“Well… if you choke me out when I wake you, at least I get to go out looking like my hero,” she whispered, leaning down and gently blowing across Vi’s hair before going to the mirror and marking her name on her cheek.

[evolutionsvoid]

All that is this world exists because of the death of gods. Great celestial corpses that have converged here and formed the land, sea and sky. Over countless millennia, these carcasses have fallen upon this world and built it into the thriving place that it is today. Even though it is the very ground we trod upon, their deaths have brought so much more. Fertile soil fit for growing vast ecosystems of trees, fungi and invertebrate. Potent fluids and humors that flow in endless rivers and bottomless oceans. And perhaps the greatest gift of all is the life that has come to call this world home. It is well known that man was born from Ichor, the blood of the gods, but many other creatures were brought here from these celestial corpses. Some emerged from the fluids, others generated from the rich bountiful flesh. But for the likes of the wormfolk, it was said that they already knew life before coming to this world, as they lived within the guts of the great gods.

It is said that the wormfolk were parasites of the gods, but that role was lost in ages past. According to their tales, the Hostia Prima was the god in which they inhabited, their kind born and living within the Intestinal Cradle. When death struck their divine host, it was devastating to their lives and culture. The corpse fell upon this world, and their original civilization collapsed. Yet, some of the wormfolk survived and were able to slither free of their perished god. Emerging into the light for the first time, they were witness to a bountiful land of plenty, where a new life for their kind could be made. And so, like man, the wormfolk took to this world and soon called it home.

Though much of their ancient knowledge and past was lost in time due to the destruction of the Intestinal Cradle and their kind abandoning much to survive in this new land, the wormfolk are not haunted by this. What happened long ago does not matter, and the world that their ancient ancestors knew is forever gone. Best to focus upon the lives of the present, and find purpose in what they have. Compared to the great works of man with his sprawling cities and grand inventions, the wormfolk are simple folk. Hunters, gatherers and farmers, living in crude villages. There are no impressive automatons built by their hands, or towering works of art erected in their name. They choose a simple life and seem content with it.

The wormfolk have boneless bodies, their flesh soft yet flexible and elastic. They possess a primary pair of tendril arms with which they do most their work. Running down their chest is another six stumpy limbs which are mainly used for grasping or holding onto objects. Their long serpentine bodies terminate in a thorny barb, which is used to anchor themselves when needed or as a weapon if threatened. Their heads possess three eyes, many sensory organs and a impressive mass of teeth. This thorny nest may look perfect for ripping into prey and carving through flesh, yet there is no mouth behind it all. The wormfolk have no mouths, rather their bodies absorb nutrients whenever it comes in contact with food. These teeth are primarily used for sifting and churning through rich muck, or pulverizing thicker globs into easier absorbed fluids. The flesh they are anchored in is more absorbent than other patches of their body, which is why they often "eat" by utilizing this part of their face. The ability for these teeth to move and vibrate to better churn its food is how the worfolk communicate with each other and man. They have learned how to quiver these teeth in such a way that when combined with air exhaust from various opening, they can speak in human tongues.

Though they eat through their skin, wormfolk do not often go about naked, as this very same flesh is also vulnerable. No tough hide to protect them, or potent spines to ward off attackers. So they may clad themselves in crude "clothes" that may be harvested from prey, or built with their own secretions. Wormfolk can excrete a glue-like substance that hardens over time. This was originally used in their host to build nests or anchor themselves in place, but now this fluid is used in the construction of homes, armor and even pottery. Wormfolk mix this liquid with clumps of waste to make a sculpting material, shaping it in the way they want before letting it dry. Once fully hardened, it becomes dense and tough, perfect for making armor or sturdy shells. While they may erect huts or sleep in burrows, wormfolk can also construct coiled shells from this material. This serves as a sort of mobile home that they can drag with them, much like a snail with its shell. Here they can store items while also using it for defense and rest. One just has to retreat inside to be safe, as the tough shell protects them. To make it even better, some wormfolk construct plug-like hats that can seal the entrance whenever they hide, making it harder for foes to breach.

Their method of feeding makes things simple at times, as they only need nutritious muck to bathe in. Places like fecal swamps have this stuff in great abundance, and thus many wormfolk villages are found there. With such a setup, the village merely needs to construct a central pool to collect the richest waste in which they rest in. However, wormfolk still may partake in solid food, be it through gathering, hunting or farming. Their setup makes tougher, crunchier foods hard to consume, so they lean more towards the squishy, fleshy and juicy. With these goods, they use their teeth to pulverize it so that they may soak it up more easily. It is said that wormfolk "eat" solid foods like this because they enjoy new flavors, while some claim this method became more popular when they came in contact with man. And when invited to their table, the wormfolk felt it polite to find a different way to feed to better engage with these fine fellows.

Interactions between worm and man are often pleasant, as either side has no ill will towards the other. The fecal swamps tend to be territories far from the Church's shining cities, and thus such foul regions are often ignored. Poorer communities tend to crop up around fecal swamps, as folk make a living by harvesting waste for fuel or hunting the creatures within. Thus, it is these people who interact most with the wormfolk, and they have built a good bond. Wormfolk tend to be kind and warm towards those they meet. Though they have little to offer, they are content with exchanging polite words or fulfilling favors.

Sadly, the kindly wormfolk are not exempt from the great war that ravages these lands. Though they have no ties to any church or front, they suffer at the madness that has gripped many. With the land falling into chaos, and horrid forces now running rampant, the wormfolk have been seen in a new light. The Arimakki that swarm the land and boil the flesh are parasites as well, and terrified souls have started to connect the two parties. It does not help that the wormfolk fit the description of the White Worm, and thus are believed to be tied to the Vile Red Tree. In their madness, soldiers and cleansers have started to believe that the wormfolk are aligned with the Arimakki, and thus they are met with burning yellowflame. After a few of their villages have been scorched, the wormfolk have packed up and fled deeper into the fecal swamps. They retreat now to more rank and sludgy regions where man struggles to travel. Here in the foul pits they hide, hoping that the flames of war burn out before they reach this rotting haven.

-----------------------------------------

"Wormfolk"

Things just ain't right til you got sentient worms!

[charlemagne-yy]

I loved AKATSUKI, I really did. Their passion had my heart. The names Keito, Kuro, and Souma felt like a warm embrace. But what Happy Elements did is unforgivable. I cannot support them anymore. Farewell Enstars, it was an interesting ride.

If anyone's is interested, DM me for the link to a Google Drive containing all of AKATSUKI's discography from 2015 - 2024. Feel free to save. Continue the boycott.

This includes:

full discography

album cover photos

complete credit and labelling of names

LONG RANT AHEAD! (mentions of imperialism, w@r, abus3, d3ath, SA, and r@cism are ahead. read at your own risk!)

I got into Enstars because of Umehara Yuichiro (Keito's VA) and of course, that automatically made me support AKATSUKI. However, going into their stories and getting to know each character, I really fell in love with them. I loved their songs, I loved what they represent.

When Happy Elements announced that Ibuki was joining, I was confused. 10 years of bond was wasted, just like that. Upon further research, I became disgusted at what the company implicated with Ibuki's arrival. It meant erasing his identity as part of an indigenous minority group to be assimilated to the the culture of his colonizers. It hurt me, not just personally, but it felt like I was struck with intergenerational trauma. My heart, that was once embraced by the love I have for Keito, Kuro, and Souma, suddenly felt like it was locked in a chokehold. Ibuki Taki did not deserve this treatment. Happy Elements shouldn't have made a character with an indigenous background if they're only capable of disrespecting and trashing on their culture. Ibuki Taki should have shined on his own.

Again, Ibuki Taki and Chiaki Kobayashi (Ibuki VA) doesn't deserve this.

See, I came from a country where Imperial Japan invaded, colonized, abused, tortured my ancestors. They came to destroy our culture, violate our people, and for what? For the assimilation of culture—they said. But was it? While they spread their propaganda and taught their culture and language, they also belittled, discriminated, t0rtured, and s3xually vi0l@ted our people because they were r@cist and x3nophobic. It's not surprising that a lot of them are like this until now (not generalizing every Japanese again). Our blood was deemed "below" them despite being their fellow human. Men, women, and children alike, they did not choose. And until now, they haven't apologized to those countries they ruined and even demanded to take down statues that commemorated the heroes and their suffering of those horrific years. Disgusting; revolting, truly.

My grandmother's father was taken by the Japanese soldiers. He was t0rtured and hung to d3ath inside a prison filled with decaying corpses. Until a flood that decimated that underground prison, their bodies would not have been found. Right now, their bodies lay at a mass grave, honored but unnamed. My grandmother's mother di3d in the bombings and she was forced to retrieve her body, clean it, dress it up, and bury it. My grandmother was only 9 years old when that war happened. She hid in between the crevices of thick stone walls that were constantly bombed. She told me, everyday she would wonder if she'll get crushed inside these stones soon. Everyday, she feared not satisfying a Japanese soldier by mere bow and will be taken into a den where women were captured, abus3d, and vi0lated day and night, again and again. For days at a time, she hid inside barrels just to retrieve food for her and her younger siblings' survival. She was orphaned and captured by the Japanese soldiers, fed propaganda, and forcibly taught their culture, and yet, her spirit remained strong, at such young age. If not for my ancestors, then at least, for her.

Despite AKATSUKI's Yamato-themed concept, I supported them. What AKATSUKI represented was not Imperial Japan, not the Meiji Period and onwards. AKATSUKI celebrated tradition and culture through the modern arts. I loved how they incorporated these concepts. Although they had their hiccups along the way (i.e. the Dance of Swords, Imperial-themed costume), I still supported them. I love what each member represented, especially Keito's integrity and devotion. But what they did with Ibuki's introduction, the absolute fuck up of Keito's character, and now, the rerecording of the songs, and the new music videos? My heart just shattered. The Rising Sun flag of Japan is a symbol of w@r, bloodshed, and trauma for the generations of people they vi0lated, and to symbolize that in Hyakka Ryouran's new MV? A beautiful song about a beautiful spring? Absolutely disgusting. They cannot have my support anymore.

Keito's entire character was trashed. His ambitions and devotion were forgotten. The words he uttered are not the words he will say; the actions he did are absolutely acts of betrayal. He will never do that to Kuro and Souma. Never. All of this bullshit, and for what? R@cist propaganda? Furthermore, Souma looked utterly out of character. He's angry and devastated—that's not him. He is hopeful and absolutely elegant. Was killing your beloved characters worth it? Shut the fuck up, Happy Elements. You will never witness the moment where their songs reaches the fucking Billboard Top 10 ever again. This is not just outrage but, absolute tragedy.

I will still love AKATSUKI, but the version where there's only three of them. I don't want to engage in content about the new AKATSUKI because it will only taint my precious memories of the three members. It really hurts. I feel like crying. Although, if I happen to upload fanfiction content about AKATSUKI in the future, it will absolutely be canon divergence because Happy Elements is just a fucking untouchable slop that even bacteria wouldn't touch.

[calphalon]

because i love you | jason todd

⤵ tw: lowercase writing, possessive behavior, yandere, unhealthy relationship, marking, nsfw ⤵ note: i just think he wants you to love him so much he doesn’t feel like he has to hurt you ⤵ inspo song: and i love you so by elvis presley

a special kind of rot was living inside his corpse. it buried itself deep in his bones till it reached the marrow and metal, demanding the muscles move in unnatural ways he never thought were in his nature. it made its way all the way up into his brain, like worms crawling through the dirt, sometimes twisting the judgement bruce believed he should have had when it came to what he did with that pretty thing of his. “clip the wings of your bird and it will learn to rely on you even if it doesn’t want to.” maybe his version of clipping was having you pressed down underneath him, biting into any exposed skin he could find after an argument. the shape of his teeth leaving an intent on your flesh, one that so clearly showed the shape of his love he forced on your body. a tangible sign he was there, his rot transferring from deep within him into your bloodstream with each bruise and bite he left. he needed the world to know you were already damaged goods, infected, so they would back away. a wild dog marking its territory. maybe his version of clipping was the way he fucked you softly, agonizingly slow. forcing your body to not only get used to the shape of his but get addicted to it. craving it, needing it, depending on it. the way you begged him to go faster, to go deeper, anything to soothe the heat he cooked inside of your stomach. something in his brain clicked and needed to hear it over and over again, the rot demanding you cry before he could give in to your needs. even when he wanted nothing more than to savor you, to please you, to treat you like a good man would, the rot came first. maybe his version of clipping was the way he isolated you from everyone that wasn’t him. even his own brothers, even his own father, no one could look at you the way he did. the rot made its way into his eyes and clouded his vision, seeing everyone as a threat in some kind of way. the rot made its way into his throat, controlling the threats he yelled at strangers who dared to show you there was the hope of an escape route. if the only arm available to carry you from room to room was his, maybe he wouldn’t constantly fear you replacing him with a cleaner mutt. if you were a bird, he must have been a wild dog carrying your corpse around in his jaw like some kind of delicate trophy till he reached wherever he thought the doorstep was. a starving, flea ridden, rotting wild dog who wanted nothing more than to eat the bird, but some poor semblance of restrain making him pick at the corpse piece by piece till only the bones were left to carry. in another life, where his corpse never rose and the hunger of love didn’t puppet him, you would be able to fly free. unfortunately, the disease of jason todd was already soaked deep into every cut on your skin till it reached that poor heart of yours. the disease that made you think you loved him, that he was the one for you despite how bad he made everything seem. even when he broke you in a way that only suited him, molded you with his fear of what would happen if you weren't there for him, and solidified that in that infected heart of yours was a hole shaped perfectly for him to hide all his guilt in. the guilt of a dog who knows he is eating his bird bones and all day by day. maybe his version of clipping was letting you still love him for how you saw him, not as he knew he was.

[skay-ali]

I give up, I'm tired

Hey, Lord, you know I'm tired

Hey, Lord, you know I'm tired

Hey, Lord, you know I'm tired of tears

Hey, Lord, just cut me loose

You hummed a song, even if all that liquid ran through every part of your body, without the strength to move you continued repeating the notes.

Your view began to change, it was no longer an empty white room, now the dark place in which you were locked, lamenting without the strength to move from the worn mattress on the floor, now a beautiful light filtered through your eyes.

"oh lord make everything stop, I surrender"

"I give up"

"I'm so tired of trying"

"I give up"

You opened your eyes, you only remembered the rays of light that invaded your vision, you could barely move before being invaded by a new place.

A smiling girl appeared before you, always seeing you, giving you a charming smile and recognizing that she saw you, very different from the other people who only recognized the girl but never recognized you, didn't you exist?...

You saw yourself dragged to follow the girl, the only one who could act with her surroundings, you saw her try to continue being happy with her surroundings.

The little girl followed her father, she called him dad with so much love, as if her life depended on him, always giving him a smile with eyes full of light and adoration, unlike the girl, the father only left her aside and was cold. The girl always ended up running and taking your hand, you felt her small body tremble, her lips joined together and formed a grimace, eyes, oh hairy eyes full of an innocent shine... they changed for another shine, when stopping at a door and hiding in a corner of a large room, the girl would let go of his hand and shed many tears...

For some reason they could play together, unlike the girl and her brothers, who never accepted her invitations and pushed her away.

Even with a crown and a beautiful dress, with a large tea set, you saw the little girl collapse in tears, while she ate some cookies and cakes.

That was until she took your hand again, after so many times she took it, you returned the touch, maybe it was hurt or the affection that you began to show her.

I take you to a large table, in another of the thousands of lonely rooms of the large house where I lived. In a second the large empty table changed.

There you were lying down, feeling a lot of pain.

"What... what's happening" you were scared when you were lying on a table being watched by the same girl who always smiled at you, now she was wearing a fake smile very different from the ones full of hope and love she had, dull eyes looking at you, a corpse was your new spectator.

"What??? did you do to me" scared you looked at the quiet girl.

"Not you who made me... who made us" his voice is broken, full of fear.

"we were never supposed to cross that line"

Then you remembered it with great horror... you were that girl, you lived through all that torment to which you were insensitive, you did this... being lying on a large table with a beautiful dress, and a bottle next to you .

Oh all this pain...

Yes, you are in your great suffering, a great party, a few more minutes and they would find you, thousands of eyes would see you, they would witness your madness.

And then no one would look at you, not even in that hospital where you were recovering from your act, some men dressed in uniform later took you, even when you resisted, cried and begged your beloved father not to leave you in that place, not to let you.

would abandon You asked and promised to be a good girl, to be everything he asked of you... anything but he wouldn't let you.

You only saw him look away and leave.

You cried, you cried a lot, as you always did, but this time there were endless days, where you felt nothing but pain, your heart hurt so much.

You felt so weak in this new place, but not only sadness, you didn't sometimes feel so much anger for... your beloved family.

And then more sadness, you needed them, no matter how much you hated them, you loved them, you felt like you were dying without them, just thinking about one of your brothers or father gave you a flood of tears.

You gave up all your life you did, since you were little, but lately, you gave up on everything around you.

And you didn't want to suffer anymore, for insignificant things.

But it was too late and you were nothing more than a disaster.

And you gave up on everything around you, you were just a spectator to your eventual end.

But that smile, that girl...

you Was there anything else waiting for you?

You would damage that girl's dream

And you would just leave

[tales-of-wocdes]

How would Havard, Lexi and Lord Sheo react to MC being kidnapped and finding where they are being kept because MC made a potion

(it looks like fire trapped in a bottle) that explodes like a Nuclear Bomb (it makes you see your own skeleton due to how bright it is) and causes fire to rain from the sky

but it has two effects heals good people and makes evil people go away

It's doesn't destroy buildings but it will burn the evil people inside as if they had been doused with napalm that can't be put out even using magic or water,

They later find MC alongside the screaming burning kidnappers and the other children they had kidnapped the mythril armor the kidnappers stole and where wearing it's even melting off due to how hot the flames are for them.

Havard ignored the screaming corpses and rushed forwards to check on MC and the other children. There would be time to think on that later. For now, he ignored everything but the children.

He grabbed MC first and looked them over from head to toe for injuries. Then moved on to the other children. Everything seemed fine.

"Lexia, we need an escort." He called out.

-----------

Lexia ignored the burning corpses and screaming, and left the children to Havard. There could be more of these kidnappers about so she kept her guard up. Even with the Ancient present, her duty was clear and thinking about anything else would be a distraction. So she stood guard nearby until Havard called for her.

"Lexia, we need an escort." Havard called out.

She moved at once. "Follow me." She said and started leading the children out of this hell.

-----------

That might have been a little excessive, you think as the fire consumes the kidnappers. Not the part that burned the kidnappers... the part where there is now fire raining down from the sky.

Still, at least it helped them find you. Your Protector and Custodian. And the Ancient. Why was something here?

Even as Havard fusses over you and the others, you watch as the Ancient walks towards the burning corpses and reaches a hand down into the flames.

The screaming stops, and he pulls out a handful of melting metal. Oh no, now he might burn too! Is something a person? The Ancient just observes his burning hand idly. Then waves it, almost casually, causing melted armor to splatter the floor. The flames disappear from his hand and from everywhere around you. His gloved hand shows no signs of damage... You are not sure what happened. Even the rain of fire stopped. Which is probably good considering how much fire there was everywhere... but how?

The Ancient glances at you... and walks deeper into this hideout. The melted armor flows like a river of silver and forms a ball in the air, trailing after the Ancient.

Then Lexia is leading you all away, and the last thing you see is the Ancient snapping their fingers, and the burned corpses turning to dust.

[kyokutsu-sama]

Headcanons| They having a s/o who is afraid of spiders

Characthers: Tengen, Sanemi, Kyojuro, Hotaru

A/n: I'm writing this one, inspired by the situation I posted here the other day about that huge spider that appeared in my bedroom and I wanted to make a scenario where they kill a spider because the reader is afraid of spiders😅

I'm actually not terrified of spiders (at least when they're small) because when they're big I get all shivering🫣

🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️

Tengen :

You and Suma were in the bedroom talking and folding some clothes to put them away in the drawers of the dresser. "Will Lord Tengen come for dinner today? I mean, he was supposed to go on a mission today." Suma said "I have no idea," you replied, picking up the folded clothes. "Maybe he won't, he hasn't come back yet, so maybe he'll be too late."You went to the chest of drawers and opened the drawer, coming across a huge spider that made you scream loudly "What's wrong?" Suma approached and when she saw the spider she immediately jumped onto the bed in fear, also screaming Tengen opened the front door and heard your screams coming from the bedroom, which made him panic. He thought some demon had come in since it was already night. He ran towards the bedroom and when he opened the door he saw you hugging Suma with one arm and using the other to hold on to your shoe as if you were threatening to kill the spider if it got even an inch closer to the two of you. He scratched the back of his neck for a moment, trying to figure out what was going on there. "Wow, what the hell is happening here? I heard you two screaming just now." He said, approaching the bed "Tengen... over there." You pointed with your shoe to the chest of drawers "What's wrong?" He looked back without understanding "There's a huge spider inside the drawer." You explained "Oh, and what do you want me to do? Protect you and Suma from the spider or the spider from the two of you?" He laughed and you threw your shoe at him "Don't be an idiot and finish that thing off now." "Okay, I'll do it." He said, approaching the open drawer and saw the spider. He used his own hand to kill it effortlessly, both you and Suma made faces of disgust. "It's dead." He said, turning to you, who sighed in relief "Thanks for killing it." You said "Thank you, Lord Tengen, it really scared us." Suma smiled at him, and he smiled back "Yeah, I know..." He approached you and stopped at the edge of the bed. "But now you can rest easy. Here, the corpse." He said, throwing the dead spider at you two, and you jumped out of bed, running away, and he laughed out loud "Tengen, you son of a bitch! I'll kill you!" You yelled

Sanemi:

Sanemi was spending the night with you today since he hadn't been called for any missions. You were happy to be able to spend more time with your husband since nights are usually very busy for him as Hashira. While he was in the kitchen finishing up dinner (yes because he definitely cooks well and no one can change my mind) you were in the bathroom taking a shower. After finishing, you wrapped yourself in the towel, drying yourself and when you went to get the dress that was on top of the cabinet, you saw a big spider that made you scream and run to the corner of the bathroom trembling. "SANEMI!!" You shouted for your husband who was scared from the kitchen, hearing your screams He left the food aside and ran to the bathroom to see what was going on. As soon as he opened the door, he found you in the corner, scared and he didn't realize what was happening. "What was all that screaming about?" He asked as he approached you "Nemi, look to the side, on the cabinet." You said, your voice trembling and pointing to where the spider was He looked to the side and saw the motionless spider and couldn't help but laugh a little. "Seriously? You were screaming and cowering because of a simple spider?" He frowned and you nodded "Yes, and rightly so. Have you seen the size of that bitch?" You replied "So what?" "So what? Kill her!" You ordered and he rolled his eyes "Holy shit, Y/n!" He slapped the spider with his bare hand and crushed it like it was nothing. "Does it really cost you that much to kill a fucking spider?" He scolded you "Yes it does, because I'm scared and those things are disgusting"You said, coming out of the corner, adjusting the towel that was slipping, and he just shook his head. "Anyway, thanks for killing her." "Hurry up and get dressed, the food must be cold by now with all the time we wasted here because of a spider." He said, turning around walking toward the door "Was it really necessary to use so much brutality?" You scratched the back of your neck, seeing the spider completely crushed "Didn't you tell me to kill it? There it is, but if you feel so sorry for it, next time I'll ignore your screams." He said, slamming the bathroom door "He's scarier than spiders," you thought, smiling

Kyojuro:

You and your husband had taken the day off to train and improve breathing and combat techniques, since in a few days you would be called to go on a mission once again. Kyojuro was as fast as ever, sometimes it was hard for you to keep up with him, even though you were a Hashira like him. He had a lot of talent and you always admired him a lot for that. Not only you, but the other Hashiras as well. His attacks were coming from all directions, your arms were already wavering, tired of trying to block them all for hours. Your body was about to give in and he still seemed to be full of energy to continue. And then after some time you fell to the ground completely sweaty and exhausted, your breathing was uneven and your limbs numb. You had been training since early afternoon and the sun was already setting, it was long and painful but it was worth it. "Well well, my wife looks so tired. I didn't overdo it with the training, did I?" He asked, crouching down next to you "Enough for me to not move for the next few days. I could barely defend myself from all those attacks." You said and he chuckled "Nah, you did really well today. You're getting stronger and that made me proud." "Thanks." You smiled You were still lying on the floor when you felt an impression on your leg as if something was crawling up your leg and when you pulled the fabric up to see, you came across a huge spider which made you scream and shake your leg so it would come off. "KYO!! HELP ME!!" Fear took over you making you jump into his arms and put your arms around his neck, screaming "Y/N! What happened! Where did you get all that strength from now?" He frowned, trying to stay stable with you in his arms since you had thrown yourself at him very suddenly and you wouldn't stop shaking your leg. "If you don't stop moving we're both going to fall." "A huge spider is crawling up my leg." You explained "Calm down, just let me see that." He put you on the floor and bent down to check, but the spider had already fallen from your leg. "It's okay, little flame, it probably fell when you swung your leg. There's nothing here." He smiled at you "Are you sure?" You said, peeking everywhere, even inside your pants to check "Not at all." He nodded "What a fucking scare!" You said, sighing in relief "Y/n, since when are you afraid of spiders? You've never told me about it." He crossed his arms with a teasing smile "I not afraid of spiders, but I mean... One that big, I do." You said, scratching your nape, and he smiled. "Are you laughing at me?" "Me? I would never make fun of my dear wife." He pulled you closer and kissed your forehead. "But from now on, I'm going to keep a spider like that one with me for when you start to run out of energy during training." He teased and you roll your eyes, slapping his chest "You're an idiot." You giggled

Hotaru :

Your husband was working long hours, forging and perfecting a new sword. Every minute of his work was precious, he loved what he did for living and if anyone dared to ruin his work, he would kill the person responsible. However, there were still little things that kept him calm and peaceful. The sound of the bells as the wind blew through them, the delicious and sweet dangos. Ah yes, his weakness... You then decided to make the recipe to take to him, who must have been hungry by now. When you arrived at the forge, he was there and you carefully entered to surprise him. He was so focused that he barely felt your presence even next to him. "Hi, dear! How are you?" You greeted him with a smile, but he continued sharpening the blade. "I brought food, you're hungry, right? Standing there for hours, working must not be an easy task." You approached him, caressing his back Seeing that he wasn't responding, you decided to run your hands along his sides and lightly tickle him, which immediately made him squirm a little and lose focus. "Y/n, I'm working..." He said, but you decided to intensify the touch, making him squirm even more "And you're ignoring me while I talk to you, and I'm not liking it one bit." "It's almost finished, okay?" He said, holding your hands. "Just a few more touches and--" "And you're going to take a break and come eat with me, got that?" You ordered and he just exhaled, rolling his eyes at you, giving in to your commands The swordsmith's eyes were now focused not on a blade but on the dango in his hands. His bright eyes looked like a stars, which you found cute. "This tastes so good." He said as he ate "Did you like it? I made it for you." "You did well then." "Thank you." You smiled You looked at the bench where he was forging a sword a moment ago and saw the shiny, sharp blade that could cut just by looking at it. You approached to see it up close. You were one of the few people he allowed to get close to his works of art and even hold them. A privilege. As soon as you picked up the sword, a spider that was on the handle ended up jumping onto your hand, making you drop the sword and start screaming, scaring Haganezuka who was eating so calmly. "What happened? Did you go crazy out of nowhere?" He asked, coming closer and you jumped into his lap, grabbing his large, strong figure. "Hotaru!! A huge spider appeared just now when I went to grab my sword." You said, distressed by the situation "And is all this fuss necessary?" He grumbled "Of course it is! It was huge and scary!" He looked at the counter and then at the floor where he saw the fearsome spider and stepped on it a few times, solving the problem. "There!! It's dead now. You can put your feet back on the ground." He said, putting you down again You sighed in relief at seeing the dead spider, but you couldn't help but grimace in disgust. "Yikes!! That's so horrible." "What was really horrible was that you dropped my sword that had just been sharpened." He said, picking up the sword from the floor and shaking his head, looking at it "I was scared. Did you see the size of that thing?" "So what? My sword is more important than the size of the spider." "Don't tell me you were going to let that thing sting me just because of a sword?"You crossed your arms "No, I mean... I would kill it, of course... But then I would kill you for dropping the sword so carelessly." He said and you narrowed your eyes at him "I should be the one killing you for being such an idiot and obsessed with swords." You said through clenched teeth

[sideaccount2025]

Why does pre shimmer season 1 Jinx look like fcking AUPowder😭 (Im about to go on a rant)

I got rid of Jinx's eyebags as best as my inexperienced ass could and tweaked her expression a bit, bro in a different lightening that is literally Powder, makes me realize why Ekko couldn't tell them apart initially😭 When he left she still looked like that to his memory(With the eyebags tho) and then he comes back and she looks like a train wreck with chopped hair, a missing finger, eyebags twice as bad, pale as a corpse and PINK eyes, bro what i would give to see the 60 minute cut is almost listed as a warcrime

But aside from that, is interesting (to me) how Jinx has a face model for when she acts like Powder where her expression becomes more innocent/harmless/childish like, meanwhile Powder always looks like Jinx, she only has one face model, perhaps because she is not fragmented by 'two identities' , doesn't have the Powder childhood trauma that would make her age regress unconsciously to such an extent that it would be shown even in her facial expressions and facial proportions. She isn't haunted by a much younger version of herself she's trying to hide and protect, because she actually lived her childhood and grew out of it, Jinx is sort of partially stuck in limbo there imo.

Idk bro is just interesting, i might be stupid for pointing this out when they are the same person, just ignore me if u think so pls.

Anyways, also, season 2 post Ekko boysaving- Jinx meeting AU!Powder would be wholesome asf imo?

Rant incoming

Maybe not season 1!Jinx or even post blowing up the council!Jinx but Jinx after rekindling with her one and only best friend and building shit together and painting on each other when she physically recoiled at touch before, i feel like with no Silco around to enable her and manipulate her, what happened with Isha plus Ekko who was once her only savior and friend seeking her out again at the edge of the abyss made a very important difference in her behavior and sanity, she's not as well adjusted as Powder is but she certainly isn't gonna like try to commit terrorism if she sees her.

I just feel like nobody can understand Jinx's struggle and mind like HERSELF, Powder has had the hallucinations too, she might still have them actually, she experienced grief to a degree aswell and over the same person too, because Jinx thought Vi was dead didn't she?. Not only that but Jinx's confidence and 'ideas that change the world' would be good for Powder who is holding herself back and staying on the sidelines even though she's smarter than anyone.

As Amanda said 'there is some Jinx in Powder and some Powder in Jinx' and in my opinion they both struggle with accepting the Powder/Jinx within them. Anyways imma stfu now, if anybody read this far is a miracle Xd