#whenever that happens

[s4cool-123]

Happy 11th anniversary to Kirby Triple Deluxe!

(Aka the game that made me go partially insane I think…for reasons everyone will understand one day)

[heartfullofleeches]

To please the masses my next oc will be no taller than 5'4

[gingeredmink]

more zero effort nonsense

btw i just suck at finding things and this has been done before right? absolutely refuse to believe no one else has paired sometsuki with TBM before, there is no way. [unless its me not realizing how niche interests are again which MEH]

[louisgoldenhour]

worst fucking 24 hours of my life

[transformersslutt]

Watching Transformers G1 Part 619

I legit ended up wheezing when Bee called the seekers underwater air pollution I wasn't expecting that

[arundolyn]

its very tiring and makes me deeply sad how often people irl kinda i guess just forget that i Have A Lot Going On and am deeply affected by it even though im not like. overwhelmed to the point of being catatonic and non functional. like its always omg that sucks if i can help let me know until i guess the way you need help is kinda inconvenient or theyre treating you like youre Normal and theres nothing going on and it just doesnt feel worth bringing up that since youre actively in the middle of a life altering crisis no youre not really Over it or at any point really feeling Normal and everything is really hard as a whole including literally just eating food or sleeping kinda okay and existing and not feeling exhausted and dead inside so could you maybe be a little bit nicer to me about it. thats too awkward and hard to say out loud and it makes me feel like a baby for caring at all

[craigularory-joe]

i saw a few community oc's in the roleplaying community when it was really active earlier this year but other than that im not sure

thats a shame. i'm sure more would pop up if we have some kind of community renaissance. but nice to know at least they exist somewhere out there

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

[aphel1on]

AuDHD is so funny sometimes like what do you mean my hyperfixations/special interests will last for years on end or possibly forever but they will cycle out every month or two with absolutely no transitional period or warning. like i will think about the same topic every day obsessively for 46 days in a row and on the 47th day with no visible cause adhd brain goes "ok! bored of that now" and autism brain goes "dw i got something queued up for ya" and i blast into full blown obsession on some other topic whose mental file folders haven't opened in 9 months. brain's out here treating hyperfixations like a crop rotation. once the dopamine runs out it cycles in another one but once something's in the rotation it never ever leaves. last summer we brought in one from when i was 11. it's so funny to me but frustrating too bc like. i cannot stress enough my inability to predict or control this. or how completely abrupt and random it can be

[pokeybananas]

Honestly, the youths get waaaaay too much hate. I frankly am so stinking impressed with this upcoming group of young adults. They had to develop through the pandemic (which has apparently put them behind a lot), but also insanely politically motivated, like I'm a big fan! I'm so proud!

Ah yes, Gen Z. The Gayest Generation

[spookberry]

I was originally gonna draw them playing russian roulette together but

[bakuliwrites]

Small update: I am slowly working on posting the 11 chapters of my Dark Sun Gwyndolin x OC post, but that should be done within the next two weeks or so! I plan to do some Arcana related content after that and work on EUH as well. Things might be a little slow for a bit. I am job hunting and things have been a bit of a mess in terms of my moving plans (was supposed to move back in June, but I have been delayed for an unknown amount of time). But I promise to have some Arcana and JJK content soon! I hope that you are all doing well and getting rest when you need it 💜

[thetom2002]

So called free thinkers when an newsworthy event happens

[charlott2n]

forgetting is crazy like theres just a last time you ever even know something happened

[vaguely-concerned]

thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:

the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)

it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.

"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)

as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.

that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.

[crismakesstuff]

“What if I become him and I don’t even know it?”