#when will you see chapter 20?
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FIC: Smoke and Mirrors - Chapter 19
Title: Smoke and Mirrors Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Theron Shan/f!Jedi Knight Rating: T Genre: Pre-Relationship, Slow Burn Synopsis: Something’s rotten on Carrick Station, and Theron won’t rest until he finds out what. But picking at the frayed threads of suspicion quickly unravels a conspiracy much larger than even the Republic’s top spy can handle on his own. (A mostly canon-compliant retelling of the Forged Alliances storyline, as seen through the eyes of Theron Shan.) Author’s Notes and Spoilers: See Chapter 1.
Chapter Index: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | Crossposted to AO3
Sense memory was a funny thing — a sound, or a smell, or even a humid sea breeze could rewind time. Theron didn’t consider himself to be overly nostalgic or sentimental, but the moment he stepped off the shuttle, and the salty, humid sea breeze on Manaan took him back. He hadn’t set foot on this planet in over a decade, but for a moment, it felt like he had never truly left.
Nostalgia probably wasn’t the right word — his time on Manaan hadn’t exactly been the high point of his life. He’d made his way here after he’d left Haashimut and the Order (or they had left him—details details). It was before he’d even been recruited into the SIS. Just him and his teenage angst against the galaxy. It hadn’t all been bad, though. Even in the darkest moments, he still had some fond memories. Like the exhilarating rush of adrenaline pumping through his veins the very first time he raced through the swoop tracks, or those times he and one of his few friends from the minor league circuit would sneak out to the docks so they could watch the sun set over the endlessly crashing waves.
He blinked away the past, taking in his current surroundings. Things had chanced in his absence; time had a way of always marching on. Everything looked a little different at this height, less grand and imposing, and more… mundane. He didn’t remember any of the storefronts lining the Mercantile Plaza, nor recognize any of the faces milling about. The pristine fountains still sparkled radiantly in the sunlight, but even their beauty didn’t seem to match up with his memory. Perhaps it was because despite the pleasant weather and the tang of the sea in the air, he could still feel the oppressive weight of the local government in every interaction he spied upon. From the signs boldly declaring the many rules of off-world visitors, to the wariness lining the faces of the non-Selkath citizens milling about. Ahh, the telltale signs of a xenophobic and isolationist state. He’d definitely not missed that part about this place.
He slipped into the crowd milling about the Mercantile Plaza with practiced ease. It was a trick he’d employed many a time back in his first time here, but now he had over a decade of fieldwork under his belt. While humans were an abundant species on most planets, here on Manaan they were a bit more of a novelty, one of those weird, hairy, land-dwelling aliens. In his experience, a lot of Selkath had difficulty distinguishing between humans. Most of the population lived happily under the waters below, and saw little the outside galaxy by the design of their controlling government. In that way, being a human both drew attention, yet also provided cover. Something an experienced spy could use to their advantage.
The trick was to blend in by standing out. Act a bit like a lost tourist refusing to ask for directions, walk with confidence as if he knew where he was going (which he did), but also pausing occasionally as if looking for landmarks. It worked, and no one gave him a second look. He had got through customs almost laughably easy, the documents he’d forged for his cover identity passing with flying colors. It had also been almost too easy to guide the conversation with the customs officer so that Theron could obtain information on Darok. Just a lot of wide, toothy smiles, vapid blinking, and incessant babbling about his work and vacation plans. That was just the kind of guy that Tev Fith was.
He couldn’t check the grin at the name he’d chosen, part of the reason for his many toothy smiles with the customs officer. If she’d been around, he was fairly certain that Teff’ith would have threatened to shoot him over it. Or maybe just taken a shot on principle alone. And wasn’t imitation supposed to be one of the greatest forms of flattery? She should be more appreciative of his attempts to include her in his undercover work. In a way, she was helping him save the Republic again.
He could just hear the “Stupid Theron” being muttered in the back of his head. It nearly made him laugh again.
The intel was good, though. Darok had arrived only two days prior, so while a little behind, Theron was on the right trail. The Colonel had also put in a request for him and another individual for deep subsurface travel starting tomorrow. Odds were good that Darok’s travel buddy was Darth Arkous. If Theron stuck around the Plaza, it was possible he might even catch the two of them out in the open — of course; the opposite was also true.
That would just be embarrassing if he was spotted. Best to be careful and observe, wait for his backup to arrive. Speaking of… he needed to double-check the whereabouts of the Defender. If Darok was heading down under the surface tomorrow, it meant that something was about to go down, and Theron fully intended to be there. It’d be nice if his asset was there too, just in case her fancy lightsaber skills were called for.
While forging his identity documents, Theron had also taken care to rent out a little office space in Tev Fith’s name. Just a little space off the primary thoroughfare of the Mercantile Plaza, but still on the main network. A good op always needed a proper base of operations. Preferably one with better climate control than deep in the bowels of a Force enhanced Sith alchemical warship. As “fun” as it was to save the Republic in nothing more than his skivvies again, he really ought to be more properly dressed if he was going to have company. Something told him that his current Jedi operative would be a little less nonplussed about it than Gnost-Dural had been.
It took Theron most of the morning to slice into Manaan’s mainframe without tripping any security protocols. He’d been able to confirm Darok’s lodgings, which were thankfully far enough away from Theron’s little base so they wouldn’t accidentally bump into each other on a caf break. But still close enough for the spy to monitor him.
The government here liked to keep a very close eye on outsiders, meaning there were security cameras almost everywhere. It was both a blessing and a curse in this situation — in that it restricted Theron’s movements outside of his little office, but also allowed him to keep a digital eye on his targets. It was tedious work, especially as he had to more or less track the security feeds, since he didn’t want to risk installing any code on the mainframe that might give away his presence in the system. But that was the job sometimes — for every pulse pounding minute of action, there were several hours of monotony leading up to it.
So Theron watched the feeds, following both Darok and Arkous around the Mercantile Plaza with his many digital eyes. Their permits to head down to the underwater facility weren’t until the next day, so he was fairly confident that they wouldn’t disappear on him completely. However, Theron wanted to be sure he knew all the players in whatever game they were playing. They were likely killing time, and seemed to have dropped the pretense of not knowing each other, as they apparently didn’t think they were being observed.
(Heh.)
With one eye, he watched them go about their day and make preparations for whatever they were up to beneath the ocean’s surface, while he tried to pull what information he could on the facility they were heading to. Documentation on Genetics Laboratory G-1 was sparse, and there was almost no public information available on the mainframe. Its actual purpose and speciality beyond “genetics” wasn’t listed anywhere. Not even Darok and Arkous’s clearance papers seemed to list what they were doing. Curious.
There was more traffic in and out of its surface level office, and didn’t seem to be much in the way of passengers or visitors, so that must have meant freight. Slicing into the customs database took more time, and didn’t exactly yield any jackpots of information, but from the amount of equipment and supplies, it seemed to be a research facility of some sort.
Although what stolen Rakatan artifacts, secret labs, and traitors to both the Republic and Empire added up to, he still wasn’t sure.
That same funny feeling was still nagging at him — that he was missing some small, but key piece of information that would tie all these pieces together. If he only had more solid information about Arkous, how he had even crossed paths with a Republic SpecOps officer, just find that intangible something—he was sure all the puzzle pieces would click into place.
His camera snooping finally failed him near the end of the day, as both Darok and Arkous settled in a place that was practically in a blind spot to the cameras, a far corner of a cafe in a busy section of the plaza. It was impossible to tell if the action had been deliberate, but considering they had been in plain sight of the cameras for the rest of the day, it was probably just dumb luck. Either way, it still meant he had to abandon the anonymity of the office if he were to continue his surveillance.
Sunsets on Manaan always had an air of mystique about them. A briny tang carried on a soft ocean breeze. The gentle lapping of waves against the plaza’s platform had a calming and almost hypnotic effect that seemed to draw the surface dwellers out in droves. Large crowds packed the plaza, taking to the cafes and outdoor restaurants as they tried to sneak in one last meal and the peaceful atmosphere before dusk set in. There was basically no nightlife to speak of, at least up on the surface. Rowdy revelry from off-worlders wasn’t exactly something the government wanted to encourage, so most everyone wrapped up their business by dark and headed back to their rooms.
Theron picked a table where he couldn’t immediately be spotted by his quarry, but could still make them out. Luckily, this cafe had its menu on a ridiculously large datapad that he could hide behind if it seemed like they were looking in his direction, but so far, he hadn’t had to deploy that flimsy excuse for a disguise.
Despite their unintentional evasion of the cameras, amongst the backdrop of the crowd, they stood out like a sore thumb. Darok’s massive size and pale bald head were immediately recognizable and made an almost hilarious counterpoint to Arkous’s more slim figure and crimson skin. The big man’s wide shoulders seemed like they barely fit the small table the two conspirators had taken for their evening meal, and his massive, beefy hands nearly dwarfed a small cup of tea. Darok seemed distinctly uncomfortable as he tried to drink from the tiny cup without slurping. His Sith co-conspirator meanwhile seemed perfectly at home, somehow taking up more room than his large companion, like he was used to stretching out and taking up as much space as physically possible.
If Theron’d had more time to set up proper surveillance, he could have maybe installed a listening device near their table, so he could make out whatever they were talking about. From this distance, he couldn’t even read their lips without getting close enough to do so could risk tipping them off to his presence. So unfortunately for now, he would have to watch from afar, keeping his attention split between his quarry and his surroundings, and hope they wouldn’t slip his surveillance net again.
Not that either of them could go very far, considering the physical limitations of the plaza, but he wanted to be sure there weren’t any other actors in whatever game these two were playing.
The streetlights were just beginning to click on, and the weight of dusk settling across the sky when something… something felt. Off. Not that nagging missing puzzle piece that had plagued him since this entire thing started — no. This was that uncomfortable itch that would take up residence at the base of his spine, making the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. It was a feeling that any good operative was well-attuned to.
He was being watched.
Theron made a show of pretending to wipe invisible droplets of sea mist from the screen of the cafe’s giant datapad menu as a cover while he glanced around. Darok and Arkous were finishing whatever amounted to an extravagant meal at this little ocean-side cafe, and the other patrons were just as oblivious to him.
Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention, but his ruse with the menu would be too awkward to keep up to glance in that direction. So he set it down and reached for his cup of caf as if he were settling in to savor the evening ambiance. The sip of hot liquid gave him an excuse to turn his head as he caught the flutter of a cape in the alleyway tucked just to the right of the cafe.
It was only a glance, but that was enough for him to just be able to make out the shape of a caped figure — humanoid, possibly female. A hood obscured the figure's features, but he could just make out a bright flash of blonde hair. That they were skulking in an alleyway automatically gave them an air of suspicion. But the closer that Theron observed them—no, definitely a her, he could see that her focus was on the cafe. Or in fact… the exact same table that he’d been observing.
This woman was also tailing Darok and Arkous too—or worse—was working with them.
The figure straightened, like a marionette on a string, and her head snapped in his direction. For a moment, Theron found himself meeting the unearthly yellow gaze of a Sith, who stared right back at him.
For the space of a breath, neither of them moved, perhaps both of them just as surprised to see the other. Then the bustle of the crowd broke the impromptu staring contest, and Theron seized the moment to melt into an opening in the throng. With almost practiced ease, he let the crowd sweep him away like he was just another wave crashing against the platform of the plaza. Just like the ocean currents, he didn’t fight the motion of the crowd, and let it carry him along until he could circle around to get a better vantage point on the woman in the alleyway.
He ignored the jostling of the strangers, every sense on alert now. He couldn’t afford to risk any confrontation, not without potentially tipping Darok and Arkous off to his presence and risking the entire investigation. A tiny voice in the back of his mind, one that sounded a bit too much like Jonas Balkar, also reminded him that right now, to not wade too far into these unknown waters. He was here with no backup, and the only person who knew where he was or what he was up to wouldn’t even be aware that he needed help until it was too late.
Right now, Theron was alone — just like he always had been.
By the time he reached the alleyway, the Sith was gone. He looked back to where he’d been sitting and spied another flutter of of a cape at the menu and cup of caf he’d abandoned.
A curse slipped loose as he realized that he’d now picked up a tail of his own. Making a split-second decision, as he was always forced to do when he was out on his own like this, and let himself get carried back off into the crowd. Away from Darok, away from Arkous, and most importantly, away from this mysterious new Sith.
#swtor fanfiction#theron shan x jedi knight#Theron Shan#Female Jedi Knight/Hero of Tython#SoR Fic O Doom#smoke and mirrors#oc: greyias highwind#otp: adorkable#swtor#fanfic#greyfic#here you go#surprise chapter update#two years later#when will you see chapter 20?#¯\_(ツ)_/¯#in the meantime enjoy theron and lana's silly mad magazine spy vs spy shenanigans#and my probably wildly inaccurate details about manaan and its government and history#because i throw my arms up in the air at it
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Danse Macabre
[Commission]
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#marcille donato#winged lion#better drawn mdzs#<- art tag I really need to change.#Turns out the secret to drawing better was having someone offer you money to draw.#I jest. I just had a blast with this prompt and I seriously appreciate the commissioner for letting me have the chance to push myself.#And for giving me permission to post! Hi! If you're seeing this: thank you again!#Let me be clear: no I don't quite know where this came from. It just happened. My chakras unblocked for a few hours.#You too can unblock my chakras with money and commission me to draw cool art B*)#We are so far off from when this is relevant so this one is really just for the manga readers. *****Spoiler notes ahead:#So...As someone who read dungeon meshi monthly for many years....I admit to not seeing Marcille becoming the dungeon lord coming#Hilarious too; re-reading and watching the show made me realize that this outcome is pretty strongly foreshadowed.#Ryoko Kui distracts you by putting the focus on Laios being the 'one to break the curse' but nope!#This was the culmination of her goals and desires.#And - for those who did not have to suffer as us monthly readers did:#YES. WE NEARLY ALL THOUGHT THAT MARCILLE HAD TO DIE.#The last 20 or so chapters were a constant spiral of: 'Oh this story isn't going to have a happy ending is it?'#She just keeps losing herself! The winged lion plays her like a puppet and she is his perfect doll! So full of conviction!
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🤍🫂🌹
#this is a very very soft announcement bc it might change (as you know me smh 🙄)#as some might remember i said like 1-2 months ago that id see how i feel about tumblr after cmi11.5 and see whether i want#to stay or close that chapter of my life! and i've been thinking about it a lotttt these days and i keep going back and forth#but i think depending on how everyone likes Entertainer it might be my last fic on here 🤍#which again.. can change depending on my mood n motivation.. im also not saying this to get attention etc but to inform you where i stand :)#writing is just a looooot of effort and tumblr has been vvv quiet (i also think my blog has lost some relevance but that's okay!! things#move fast)#i have soooo many wips i love lol 😭 but im not sure if i have the energy to write 20-40k stuff when nobody's around anymore :(#but let's see how you like Entertainer bc im vvv excited for it!! 🥰 keep spreading love until then <3#love you guys sm 🤍#might delete since it's an unsure post.. just wanted those who see this or care to know 🫂
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everyday im fighting for my life because i always hate the sex parts of my gay porn comics
#i can count on my hand the number of times ive actually enjoyed reading sex in a yaoi#like solid 30-50% of the time i feel neutral reading it#and other 50-70% i feel like UGHHH *groans* to OH MY GOD NOOOOOO **squemish**#because i dont like sex unless its established relationship and like about love and emotions etc etc#im really picky and its my green onions when i have to get through first 20 chaps of sucking and fucking that doesnt have enough emotional#value yet because they dont like eachother enough yey#fml everytime i want sex its in a damn shounen ai because i read 30 chaps of shounen ai and go THIS IS AMAZING. NOW PLEASE FUCK#I AM BEGGING YOU PLEASE BANG ON SCREEN I WILL DO ANYTHING TO SEE THJS#Ill always say i love yaoi because i do and saying shounen ai makes people think im lumped with anti fujos (all anti fujos should die)#but ngl when i was younger i was like yeahhh i prefer shounen ai and tbh i think i still do because i love sex but shounen ai always has#better quality control because they arent relying on chapter 1 sucking and fucking#instead they need to grab the audience in other ways. namely being funny or crazy
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Fuschia/Magenta?
#*deep breath kicks down uni door*#VERN!!! VERNIFRED!!! I GOT A HUGE BONE TO PICK WITH YOU!!!!! YES YOU!!!!#“we're only gonna read 1 chap of Don Quixote because it's too much to dive into.”#THIS COMING FROM THE MAN WHO MADE US READ THE ENTIRETY OF DANTES INFERNO#WHO MADE US WRITE 20 PAGE ESSAYS ON THE ODYSSEY#WHO MADE US FOLLOW HIS CANTERBURY TALES HYPERFIXATION FOR NOT 1 BUT 2 SEMESTERS#DISSECTING EVERY. FUCKING. CHARACTER. ACTION.#MAKING ME RESENT CHAUCER TO WHERE I COULDN'T WATCH A KNIGHTS TALE FOR 3 YEARS STRAIGHT#one of my all time favorite movies btw YOU MADE ME HATE THE THING I LOVED VERNIFRED#and you had the GALL to say the class only had 1 chap to dedicate to Don Quixote?#YOU MY FRIEND JUST DIDN'T WANT THE CLASS TO LOSE THEIR SHIT LAUGHING EVERY OTHER CHAPTER#IF YOU'RE AROUND HUMAN HAPPINESS YOU'RE LIKE A WORM DISCOVERING THE BAIT SECTION AT WALMART#ITS EASY TO READ FOR A CLASSIC HAS WIT IS BITTER SWEET AF IS TRAGIC IS FUN AND MAKES YOU WANT TO HAVE CRAZY MAN BIG DICK ENERGY#WHEN YOU HAVE A FOOT IN THE GRAVE#and the banter...THAT SHIT ROCKS#AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THIS CAUSE OF MY OWN HYPERFIX WITH LUIS AND I'M READING FOR RESEARCH#these stories FUCK#I AM SO MAD#SO SO MAD MY PEERS AND I GOT A TASTE OF SOMETHING THAT WOULD'VE KEPT US ENGAGED#AND I AM MAD THAT I RESENTED THAT CLASS SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO TOUCH THE CLASSICS FOR A WHILE#and that it took me until I'm 31 WRITING A DAMN FANFIC IN MY SPARE TIME TO READ THE ENTIRETY OF WHAT I FUCKING MISSED OUT ON#astarion voice: IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!#vernifred...can i can i call you vern?#look...i love you. you were one of the most humble profs i had i looked forward to going to class every mon and tues for lecture and reading#i get the hyperfixations my guy i really and truly do#BUT I STILL RESENT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU FOR THIS ONE#i finally get why luis loved this shit so much too and im seeing more connections with re4 now and it feels like the cherry on top of it all#vern....just....SIGH....GIVE THE DON A CHANCE MAN#FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN WHO WILL BE IN YOUR CARE#YOU KNOW...YOU JUST...MAKE ME...GRRRHFHFHHDJDJ!!! 🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼
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btw with all my posts abt dazai surviving i do think it will take at least a few more chapters until that's revealed. maybe we'll get a continuation of chuuya's storyline but dazai needs to stay dead for a few more chapters for the pacing of the story as a whole (as frustrating as it is for those following it monthly)
#i remember seeing a lot of frustration abt the pacing of all the fukuchi chapters in a row#like both with sskk and fukuzawa#but. when you read the story as a whole. it takes like 20 minutes at most to read these all together#you can't set up a conflict and resolve it next chapter without at least some more build up#and despite the fyodor thing being a long time conflict. i consider dazai getting shot in the head a new point in it that needs -#- its own time to get resolved#i think it would be cool to see chuuya come back to the room and attack fyodor next week as a reveal he's conscious at least#and then 2-3 chapters later reveal it was part of dazai's plan. like he'd limp his way to the room. or chuuya will reveal it himself!#ok now I'm just being delusional lol#THE POINT IS while it's frustrating to read month to month. it has to take time for the benefit of the final product#who knows tho i might be proven wrong 👍 that's fine too
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To get good at telling stories... writing stories... one must... practice by writing stories ;-;
#rant#i tell u what i think id have functioned well in a wrbnovel publishing format. but i dont think#any good sites for that exist in english as of yet? (i think theres one but its contract is Yikes i heard)#but just like. the idea of publishing chapter ever 1-2 weeks until youre done. maybe 20 chapters maube 2000. maybr you never finish.#most of the chapters free and maybe idk you make some advertizing money on ads viewed on your chapter page. or make the last couple extras#paid only idk. but the big thing? the point im getting to - sorry i got lost in the sauce -#my point is: you probably DO write shit at first. or write fine with some SHIT ARCS or rushed chapters to hit ur weekly updates#and 5 years from then youll look back and wanna overhaul some of those fucking stories (weve seen many a jjwxc writer revise later).#but wow will you have practiced writing a LOT.#youll have 100k 500k 1 million 5 million words worth of writing under your belt in a few years#and youll probably be a hell of a lot better at knowing how to make more chaptwrs on average interezsting and Building Consistently to your#main plot and arcs. you'll probably get much bettwr at raw scheduling of wriitng and pre-planning that works for you and structure mapping#youll have a much better idea of your personal strengths whrn you need to lean on them for a rough month when your story's turned#into a mess. youll value your own writing more (i hope) cause LOOK how much you fucking accomplished.#like. npss? dmbjs author? idk about others but i can definitely see the improvement in wriitng skill#between dmbj book 1 and the recent heihua book and mountain village book#(in terms of style in word choice. and goals for the story set out to be told)#i look at priest and newer novels by priest are as impressive as any literary novel ive ever analysed#(and older ones while i also love i do see their slightly rougher word choice and how some were executed a bit#more up and down/not as tightly)#i just. agh. i am :c feeling that ill probably write 200k words this year#and none of it will be as good as i want. but i NEED to write these first 200k#because the only way i get better. get to the way i want to write. is to make the progress of improvement with this first 200k.#ToT fun fact i wrote 170k words this year. WOW. and maybe 400k words of fanfic in the 4 years prior (so 100k words on average)#i know i am imptoving. i just gotta keep at it.#also? annoying i cant focus my attention lmao. 160k words is mkre than enough to finish a 1st draft novel#but me? i split those among like 20 projects this year. so the novel most written so far is still only at 40k#and im probably going to need 60k more words to finish it
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I LIKE MY MEN WET, PATHETIC AND STUPID you know me too well! I cannot wait for another installation of ‘why don’t these idiots realise they actually love each other beneath their layers of hate and insecurity in this mysterious land full of old creepy royals’ !!!! 💗
He does something that's just so, "oh my god you WET MOP"
#i won't spoil it but you'll know it when you see it#probably more than 20 chapters at this point#I'm having so much fun dragging this out
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lachrimae is now almost as long as rainfall which is a) a weird thought and b) i just registered that both their titles are about water, which is something i genuinely had not realized before typing this post
#it's about 67k#rainfall clocks out around 69k#'wow so lachrimae is novel length!!' you say. 'is it almost done??'#'HAHA!!!!!' i respond. 'no.'#we're almost done w chapter 12#current estimate is 18 chapters but like. we'll see lmao#might be more like 20#it keeps getting longer#remember when i thought it would be 16 chapters??? good times#i was so innocent and naive#thinking i could write a longfic that would only be about 100k...
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Soooo, I have some writing news for my readers. The good news is that I have spend several hours today working on one of my WIPs and I am so hyped to work on it again after a long hiatus.
The bad news is that it's not the WIP you want me to work on. It's the sequel to I Come With Knives. The WIP that has been hibernating for four years this month ¯\_ (ツ) _/¯
#writing#it looks like i have finally solved the plot issues#have 9 chapters outlined#i'm only telling you the chapter number#so y'all can see how wrong i was when i end up with anything between 8 and 20 chapters
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⚙️⚙️⚙️
And then Dex tries to climb under his covers as quietly as he can and curls up on his side, so he can fake being asleep if his mom pops in to check on him. (She’s a light sleeper, which she’s jokingly coined as her proof that she married into the Dizznee family instead of being born into it.)
#i see you in my askbox and i go !!#because it's like. whoa. cool writer mutual#btw i am most likely reading alira(taor) out loud to my partners this weekend#because i have demanded one of them to read it and the other's just there for the ride#the one i have demanded to read it made me read their fav genshin fic#so i was like alright you're gonna read my fav multichapter kotlc fic now#and it has yet to happen so i'm gonna make it happen#they know almost zero kotlc lore so it will be funny#but they were there when i read chapter 20 for the first time and watched me die over multiple parts#and i read a few clips out loud and they were like 'i don't even need to know the source material to know that's beautiful'#so. there is your alira(taor) love i will not stop giving you because i love the fic too much to do that#ask#when-wax-wings-melt#qpr keefex fic
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Reading abo in batfam is so funny bc it’s like. U could just be writing about the women. U could just be writing about the girls. U shaped white boy 3’s entire personality around being an omega and the harassment that comes with it and Steph is there….making waffles. And cass is there saying….’little brother hurt. Do better’ to everyone else. Ok
#and It’s like#in ur other fics it’s the same damn thing#so we DO understand how misogyny can show in tiny micro moments#it can be a phrase you never thought too deeply about#an action you do for x group and not y group#double standards. in how u see behavior.#but the fic exploring all that is about Bruce Wayne#and It’s like ‘it’s a fic let ppl have fun’ the fic is literally about how ur behaviors are shaped by the society ur in#also the fic is tagged with Steph and she’s in 2 chapters outta 20 so. fuck you 🤷🏾♀️#sorry remember like last month when I posted steph and her haircut#I’ve been on a steph kick since then and the more I read the angrier I get#again I’m terrible with author names but the misogny she’s faced since the start is sooooo#and It’s like I’m simultaneously reading comics and metas#and someone saying Steph was wrong for not trusting tim#in the same comic he cheated on someone in#like hellooooo#whats going on up there 😭
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*rereads Paris and Helene's second meeting for the nth time*
me every goddamn time: THEY HAVE SO MUCH CHEMISTRY HOW THE FUCK DO THEY HAVE THIS MUCH CHEMISTRY
It's so so so SO fun watching this entire meeting and how they both seem to constantly be in a little dance of sorts wherein Paris openly declares his interest in her and Helene keeps shutting him down ("You should come to Kylon. We won't overwork you the way your family does" -> "I don't have time to indulge in a life with people who don't think" -> "well that's good because i think about you so much i can't sleep"-> "and? get to the point already". like jfc he's not fucking vague about this At All).
But the best part is, for offstandish and disinterested as Helene is towards Paris (with her words cold and blunt towards him), it's really hard to deny that there isn't some interest on her part without there really being interest on her part (which is. confusing i know but. in context. oh. my god. she's a queerplatonic icon around Paris and i adore her for it)
My favorite thing to see in this scene is the way Paris reaches for Helene's face, casually brushing the back of his fingers against her cheek and through her hair (while commenting on how being this close to her makes his instincts spike with unease), and the moment Helene downs him she does the same exact gesture to him, lifting up his chin and brushing the back of her fingers against his face similarly. Which. Wow. I need more female antagonists to do this shit it is literally so cool to see.
Also the way Helene and Paris constantly are gauging each other is so neat. The way Helene tells Paris to "not long for what he can't have" (i.e. herself) is so neat. The way Paris is clear about his interest in Helene and she in turn matches that interest by toying with him in a way she's done with no one else in the cast is just. there is sooooo much there between them and i greatly enjoy whatever the fuck kind of chemistry it is they share because it is literally the epitome of what i crave in ships
#the mighty extra#Helene not batting an eye at Paris's advances yet doing shit like letting him touch her face and then lifting up his chin is just#ugh#how can you not ship them when there are just subtle cues like THAT that make the vibes between them so queerplatonic#i also love how Paris reaching for Helene's face reveals the fact he's very fucking uneasy around her despite his interest in her#that is a delicious contradiction for him to have and i really wonder what causes him to tremble when he tries to touch her#is it a strength thing a la he's aware she's more powerful than him and his dragon instincts quail at that?#which doesn't quite explain why Fian wouldn't react the same to Lyla?#or is this foreshadowing that Paris is aware on an instinctual level that she's an “enemy” and he can't override that instinct?#hence why he seems maddened by his own interest in her because it contradicts the very nature dragons have?#Helene also saying to him that his instincts are telling him “he shouldn't long for what he cannot have” is really sus tho#because i thiiiiink the basis for her saying that is she's warning Paris she's stronger than him therefore she can overpower him#but that's only based on current context i can scrap together and not like#potential context we've yet to get considering this manhwa has a fun habit of answering questions 20+ chapters later#and often in indirect reference to what the question was in the first place#which makes this manga suuuuuuuuuper fun to reread because you always end up learning something new#aka my favorite writing technique in existence lmao#i also wonder why Helene tells him specifically “dont long for what you can't have”#because the way she says that implies there's something deeper behind her words and i can't puzzle it out#especially because Phillip calling Helene “kindly despite her cold mask” when he saw her dancing with Paris alludes soooo many things#and that she may indeed hold interest towards him to some degree but her warning him off states she has a reason for doing so#and waaaaaaaah i think it's obvious there's something there on Helene's end#bc she seems to be true to her self only around him and she doesn't seem to care if he touches her (which is. Very Interesting)#but unless Phillip is mistaken it sounds like Helene does hold some interest in Paris but also she's uninterested in reciprocating#i think????#i think at this point their interest in eachother is both superficial is how i read it but god does that not stop them from having chemistr#and i literally cannot wait to see what it takes to get Paris and Helene from a place of hostile interest in each other to actual lovers#(im so excited for their next scene together can u tell)#(especially since Paris is finally taking Helene up on her offer of getting her help any time he wants)#(and he hasn't seen her since he made the comments that he did in chp 65)
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forget my school course or finishing putts should i watch the first 1/2 of brokeback mountain instead of going to bed tn. forget work in the morning it may need to happen.
#lee’s bullshit#one gifset and thats all it takes !!#i rlly need to shower first tho. sorry to my mother who hates when i shower late i cannot be stopped. or made to shower earlier. anyway.#please lord dont let any bugs come into my room via the broken window while i am gone. thank you amen and all that.#lets see if i can manage all three. would have to get through another 20/30 mins of the course to finish the section#write abt 15 mins to finish the next putts chapter and find a way to log in on my computer to wherever i can stream bm . we will see.
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in terms of art alone im sorry. im a jrjr defender to my last breath you be fucking nice to him. i dont wanna hear shit❗️❗️❗️
#can someone also get him better inkers rn i am begging. pleading even. HE MAKES GOOD STUFF THEY JUST GIVE HIM SHIT INKERS WHO DONT GET IT.#MY FIRM BELIEF. im sorry. i like his stuff. there are certain things not quite my taste but i think he does good overall im a fan. BE NICE#static.soundz#sorry that last post was so directly inspired by seeing someone go can u guys be nice he is on a fucking nutbag schedule. which he is.#i dont think some people understand the insanity of comic production. and how much it takes a toll on you.#many have said and i will say it too: comics is a killing industry. it is a beautiful fun job. it is fulfilling. it will also destroy you.#the most common and easiest to use example is in fact the manga industry. they want chapters in a week. 20 page type chapters in a week.#A WEEK!!! and currently look at things like webtoon as well which also expect the same amount of pages. in a week. an issue in a week#is an insane demand. it is an unreasonable demand. it is scheduling that leads you to a crash and burnout and health issues#because it is fully finished polished pages. as much as i poke and complain about how some things look there#i am also highly aware of production schedules. even if some styles are not my taste that still doesnt mean it isnt insane work#and it's the same in american big industry comics too. it isnt weekly demand the way those are. but it's still an intense schedule#you are working on pages and can get behind years before those comics even hit shelves.#and as it becomes more individualized too as we lose the team element and work becomes more one person doing all pencils and inks#that schedule is a lot. it just is. it doesnt matter if theres more time in comparison to other parts of the industry#the point is that it is all very demanding and exploitative. there is a drive yourself to your grave mentality here and i've had ppl try#to shove that mindset onto my and my peers which is the worst thing possible to encourage. highly alarming and disheartening to encourage#impressionable students already so worried about making it to drive themselves to an early grave. abuse substances to get through work.#work excessive hours while you still can because when you hit your 30s youre gonna lose that ability#become bitter and prepared for rejection as opposed to success because this industry sucks!#it's just such an unhealthy depressing mindset. i've had more artists preach the exact opposite as that and more ppl have been trying to#shift over to valuing your time and health. but still a lot of people are in that other mentality. and it's very very very sad.#i am only a student doing very low stakes homework for classes. i have no industry experience. and i still get it taken out of me#to do fully fledged out pages in my style in one week. this is also just a thing for me bc certain personal factors just make it hard#but still. comics are fun. they are fun. they are fulfilling. they will lead you to so many fucking issues if you are not highly careful#there is a reason why so so so many fucking comic artists have very well known issues. why you hear about so many ppl with substance issues#artists with very poor mental health. when you are in comics this is how it is.#i am glad there has been a big shift in recent years towards taking care of yourself as an artist. and that more ppl try to value it so tha#things can hopefully change at large in a broader sense. but please remember. we are an exploited chew up spit out industry too.
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What Famous Author Do You Write Like?
Tagged By: I stole it from @southern-belle-outcasts
Tagging: Anyone who wants to do it <3
#ooc.#((This is based on 20 pages of a fic that I'll never finish so I think that was enough to go on this time lmao))#((When I did part 1 (15 pages fully finished) and part 2 (a 5 page start of a rough draft) separate#I got Neil Gaiman for the first chapter and Arthur Conan Doyle for the second part.#Then I tried it with an old reply from Rogue's blog and a drabble for her and got Anne Rice both times.#Then I threw in a train of thought kind of letter thing that I wrote once to spit out some things I needed to say (but never sent)#and I got J.D. Salinger- so take all that as you will xD))#((But I stuck with Neil Gaiman since it was my first one and also because it was the longest thing I added ^^;))#((Though Anne Rice has been semi-consistent for stuff from Rogue's blog specifically so idk ^^;))#((Really I'm just having fun throwing stuff in and seeing what I get xD))
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