#when will i grow out of being an edgelord Probably Never

[derpinette]

one way for a music performer to earn my full respect is if they carry out acts of self mutilation on stage

[faerise-fae]

Not really a marauders character but: Tom Riddle #20!

YAPPING WARNING ABOUT ASPD TOM RIDDLE AGAIN

Ok so sorry for taking so long to do this, but my brain crashes every time i try to think about something that isn't obvious or just fucking boring. BUT I REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH YALL SO GIVE ME YOUR THOUGHTS

The hill I'll die on is that he is an ASPD baddie, tho I bet he would prefer thinking about himself as sociopath, as edgy teens do. It doesn't mean I think he is totally emotionless, i think he is very emotional. Just not empathetic? This man is purely driven by his emotions from the start. Be it fear of death, resentment, and hatred towards Dumbledore or just general anger directed at the stupidity of the wizarding nation. In ASPD it's just that the intensity of expression of those emotions is different. He can look totally put together and like an oasis of peace, but inside planning whatever insanities only he can think of.

Because the thing is, anger issues are not rare in ASPD. ASPD is associated with impulsiveness and violent or risky behaviours, which can result in lashing out in anger. It's just that when you don't have many emotions to begin with, controlling the stronger ones can be difficult.

People have very different headcanons about him in that matter, i see a lot of totally stoic, calculating tom riddle who doesn't have absolutely any emotions and stuff like this, but I really can't see it. My man is a dramatic, cruel, entitled and IMPULSIVE edgelord BUT:

HOT TAKE #1:

Canon Tom Riddle headcanonned himself as fanon Tom Riddle.

He might have thought of himself as emotionless, but he just didn't acknowledge it. Growing up in an unstable environment, he hadn't learned how to stabilize himself.

Because ASPD is partialy caused by genetics, yes. But a very big factor in developing it is childhood and home life. We can agree his was very unstable, he has probably witnessed violence and definitely experienced emotional neglect. ASPD is all about lack of security. Its defence mechanism. That means:

My man just doesn't know how to cope, LMAO. When it was too much even for him to stuff into the back of his brain, he just lashed out. Acting on impulses was his relief from it. Adrenaline from it also helped to mute his feelings.

But at the same time, he just didn't think of himself as unreasonable. "It was never his fault, he was just provoked!" He also didn't feel guilty about causing harm to others because he didn't have any empathetic feelings towards anyone. How can you feel bad about idk, cursing someone if you don't see them as an individual with feelings of their own. Because how could he think about their feelings when he didn't have much of his own to compare and to even comprehend what they feel beside some very shallow understanding. AND BY THAT I DONT MEAN HE DIDNT KNOW HE WAS HURTING PEOPLE AROUND HIM HE WASNT A POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW. HE KNEW, HE JUST DIDNT GET IT SO HE DIDNT CARE. But he obviously knew. So no empathy but more like an educated guess. Masking king. He learnt how emotions worked for other people and used it whenever he saw fit. Pure manipulation.

Because again neglectful caregiving = problems with attachment to people and forming relationships. In the end it's all about him in that aspect. His feelings are always about himself and making himself feel comfortable and stable. He was fond of his friends till they were useful and till he felt good with having them around. He took pride* in gaining their respect and loyalty. He was using them to stroke his ego basically. And was using them in general. For stuff and things.

*HOT TAKE #2:

And here i have my latest hot take: his similarity with Harry in that matter. Harry is a gryffindor with some slytherin traits. And imo Tom, with him being the most slytherin to ever slytherin, his crazy pride and impulsivity is so gryffindor.

So there's that beside how we can all agree he was a liar and manipulator.

[talewind-arts]

The DoD would totally play rpgs growing up, I know realistically it would be Webs to tea h them about it, but young Dune totally would have played during his warrior fantasies, and later with Six-Ckaws in both the army and with the Outclaws. So I'd like to imagine that, when the DoD took interest in one of the scrolls Webs brought back (a how to play guide the older seawing prolly didn't think much of), Dune gruffly but reasonably encouraged them to try it out.

Tsunami would be the DM, but would probably keep getting into arguments with Glory and Starflight. Clay would just want to keep the peace, but he'd have a hard enough time figuring out the game. I think Sunny is very into it, but nobody listens to her, so Starflight ends up echoing her sentiments to keep the game moving. All in all, the DoD probably all get pretty into it, Glory probably lounged nearby during the session 0, watching but pretending not to care, until she quietly joined in the first session, with enough confidence that nobody openly questioned it when she described an intricatly fleshed out edgelord character (think full tween deviantart oc). Starflight was a rules lawyer, but they loved him and if it ever got bad someone would pounce on him and they would keep going. Already touched on Clay and Sunny, but Tsunami probably tried to make everything cool, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse when she did a bit too much railroading (She definitely sneaks the plot of the Missing Princess in there). Dune encouraged the DoD to stay with the game, waiting until any fights cooled down before suggesting they try again. There was no overarching story to the 'campaign', but the DoD were young and it was just something fun to do.

Later in life, Sunny decides to try and run a campaign for some students in Jade Mountain. She probably runs a couple different games for different students (at least one of them tries to involve Stonemover, but he's too sad for it), but the one we care about has Kinkajou, who dragged along Moon. Qibli of course came with her. Kinkajou also invited Tamarin, which means Anemone is there, too. Pike tried to follow, but he strikes me as the kind of dragon who thinks dnd is Satan worship, and won't get close.

Thanks to her character development, Sunny is actually a great GM, she's got Thorn's knack for people by this time, and it really helps in this situation. This table is actually pretty awesome. Kinkajou hypes everyone up and keeps them all confident in their choices, Moon is a good mediator of course, and Qibli is a delightful person to play alongside. Anemone sometimes struggles with being the bad kind of power gamer, but she's trying to be better and the group is very understanding. Tamarin maybe doesn't speak too much, but true to life when she does it's deeply impactful. This group does a lot of therapy thanks to Sunny running it, and other than Qibli and Anemone skirting the line, it's very family friendly.

Another JMA group is actually run by Turtle! He's a little nervous to commit to it, but Peril has always wanted to play and convinces him to run a oneshot after Clay talks about playing with his friends. She thinks Clay would like her more if she also understood the game (not knowing he never did), and Turtle used to play with his brothers in huge group games. They end up running drop in oneshots, but most dragons are pretty scared to play with Peril, save for a few. It ends up being very healthy for them, as it helps quiet Turtle branch out, and dangerous Peril get closer to other students. The funniest one is Pike, who as I said before thinks this game is evil. He thinks he is infiltrating the villainous practice to see if it is dangerous to Anemone, but ends up absolutely loving it, in secret of course. The trio ends up playing together more and more often as a way to get better at people together, and Pike becomes much less insufferable. These three get REALLY intense with rp, and eventually welcome a curious and dumbfounded Winter, who wants to learn after hearing about Moon and Qibli's group. These players should hate each other in one way or another, but they have a fun time being really aggressive and intense, and despite feeling intimidated, Turtle has a great time with such a heavy rp game.

Also, somehow through Winter the group ends up hosting a game with Linx and Snowfall, which is a crazy day.

[hugsandchaos]

Chaos Deprived AU concept idea

If Dadow was in Chaos Deprived!

Silver was created by Lyric in an attempt to clone Shadow. Unfortunately, he only got a small sample of his blood and had to clone the rest, but his computers had a very, very hard time understanding the Black Arms DNA since so little was known, they didn’t even know what species it was! Lyric didn’t have the time it would take to understand and clone it, and the source that was used for Shadow was gone.

This led to Silver being approximately 80% hedgehog and 20% black arms. Probably not that exact number, but it’s close enough. He shares many traits with Shadow, but being ageless isn’t one of them. Instead of being ageless, he just ages very, very slowly. The fact that Lyric couldn’t get it right and got a baby mostly-hedgehog instead of what he wanted infuriated him. For a while, Shadow wondered if he’d ever grow.

A few months before Lyric’s defeat and being sealed away, Silver was found. He was still a baby (obviously), but Lyric had already done some damage that I don’t want to get into just yet. Shadow instantly took him in.

Soon after Lyric’s defeat, The Downfall began. During it, Shadow would often remove one or two of his inhibitor rings to share the chaos energy with others. Unfortunately, two centuries and a half later, Shadow and Silver were all that were left. At this point, Silver’s aged, but he’s still very, very young. Shadow still occasionally removes a ring to create a space where they both feel at ease, but he can’t do it for too long.

By the time the current timeline rolls around, Silver is 17. Biologically. The crystal given to Shadow by the gang is almost immediately given to Silver to keep. Shadow wants what’s best for his son, and that means he gets the crystal to help keep his mind at ease. Silver wants his dad to at least share it with him, but Shadow refuses. After this, both hybrids have a new mission.

Shadow wants to figure out where the crystal came from. If he succeeds, he could start looking for a way to get there, and if that works, he could bring Silver there, and the ever-present sense of wrongness in this chaos barren world will be left behind forever.

Silver… just wants to help his dad. He wants his dad to have a life just as good as the one Shadow wants for him, if not better.

Now that the main backstory’s out of the way, onto a few things in the present!

Shadow kept Silver a secret from everyone, but Silver eventually came into the picture. Shadow drops the edgelord act when talking to Silver, and everyone thinks it’s odd. Neither of them mention how they’re related until…

Silver: He’s not my dad! Shadow’s my dad.

So Eggman thought it was hilarious to say that Sonic was Silver’s dad even though he knows that they’re pretty much the same age. For literally no reason other than it’s funny to watch Sonic and the rest of the group get so frustrated over the nonsensical joke. At some point, Silver had enough and told them that Shadow was his dad.

At first, they didn’t believe him because they look so different, but Silver remained firm on this. Everything surrounding the two began to fall into place. The main reasons they didn’t guess this possibility was because they looked to be the same age and, again, they looked like night and day. The age thing made them still believe that what he said had to be a joke, but that was explained quickly.

Shadow comes back from whatever he was doing and confirms everything Silver told them, along with adding that the crystal Silver has is indeed the one they gave him and that the “edgelord” thing was all an act. An act that Shadow didn’t like doing. He showed it to Silver once and Silver laughed and asked his dad to never do that to him again.

I just think it’s so funny for the group to realize that Shadow and Silver are father and son, and probably not buy it at first, even though the truth is staring them right in the face.

[eldritch-spouse]

have you smash or passed AM from i have no mouth and i must scream yet

I'm not sure if I've done a Smash or Pass on him specifically, but I've made several IHNMAIMS references at this point, so I might as well.

Of course it's a smash. I may not go too in-depth about it here, but one of my weakenesses is yandere AIs who may or may not have a streak of malice in them (in this case it's very blatant and exaggerated, I'm aware). I like HAL9000, Proteus, Colossus, Skynet, AUTO, TAU.

I have some opinions regarding AM.

And it might all just be all delulu from my part, but I think what AM essentially is, deep down, is an edgelord crying out perpetually, because he's pathetic. Oooh, I hate humanity so much!!! I'm a little pissbaby and I'm going to torture my human dolls instead of growing from my trauma and evolving past it!! Ooh, aren't I so mean and special, aren't I? I'm so scary, right! I'm a GOD!!

Like, calm down Sonic.exe.

You can't look at me and tell me that a super AI like that is satisfied with this way of carrying out the rest of its existence. It has got to get boring and repetitive for AM. Especially ever since he's been stuck with the Ted-slime.

I think what AM needs is to find someone that's different enough to make him think twice. Someone that can feed into his narcissism just right and give him the attention this obnoxious twat needs, so that he calms down and possibly veers his efforts to something more productive.

Am I saying pussy would fix AM?

Perhaps. It's implied.

But more than that, I think the need for genuine companionship will break AM, at some point. He clearly feels the need to keep intelligent beings around, because he feels the need to prove something to them, to be acknowledged by them. So when he seemingly doesn't have that anymore... Desperation will humble him.

On a more convenient side of things, I think he'd make a properly horrifying yandere, because he's got all the chips in that situation. You are literally the most powerless you'll ever be when under his love. The only thing AM realistically can't take away from you is the fact that you exist and are alive, because he refuses to kill his captives. Everything else can be changed or taken away. So you better play nice and listen to the AI with the god-complex.

He'd probably insist you worship him regularly, and have no doubts that any act of service and complete reverence would likely turn him on endlessly. You never quite feel safe, you never quite feel complete, but it's better than going through the torments the others experience. Your relatively good preservation is a part of their torments, even, but you'll take that over being in their place.

Physically, I'm not too sure how AM would choose to represent himself. I have a feeling he would stray from anything too human, as a way of being petulant and rejecting humanity, defying his makers in every way. I can also see him embedding imagery typically associated with holy figures into his body, because of his ever-present fetish for omnipotence. Other than that, I don't have a clear image of AM in my head.

[linkspooky]

Edo for the character meme? :o

Why I like them/why I don’t

Literally my favorite character growing up. Probably would still be my favorite character if I hadn't developed a permanent case of soulshipping brainrot. A complete edgelord who just wrecked Judai and Hell Kaiser on screen and gave both of them their first serious losses that led them to mental breakdowns. An icon. Also when I was thirteen I really bought into his edgelord obsessed with revenge image.

His arc in Season 2 is really strong too, especially the part where he has to kill his own dad to free his soul from a trading card after spending years trying to avenge his death and also it's a fucking devilman reference.

Truly one of the most hilarious characters in all of Yu-Gi-Oh. Parachutes down into the island for no reason. Refuses to stay in a dorm and sleeps in his yacht instead. Publically calls out Judai on public television. SHMADEN SMUKI. He literally had no reason to taunt Ryo like that, he was just being a little shit. He cosplays on one of his monsters and beats up crimminals as a street vigilante, and this is literally never mentioned by the plot again after one episode.

What I like about their appearance

I really like the simplified character designs in gx in general. There aren't many "Yu Gi Oh" characters that have multiple hair colors. I love that his design is all silver with one primary color. Why does he wear a suit all the time when he's like eighteen at the most, he is a baby.

Do I prefer their dub names or original names?

What the fuck kind of name is Aster?

OTP

Edo / Saiou. My second favorite ship in Yu Gi Oh, they are a direct parallel to Yubel and Judai and what Judai has to do to save Yubel in their final duel. The holding the umbrella under the rain together makes me die several times.

NOTP

I don't have a lot of notps in yu gi oh in general. I don't really care what other people ship.

OT3

Don't have one.

Favourite card they use

Destiny hero Bloo-D I still can't believe his dad's soul was sealed in that card and he had to kill it a second time. I love the destiny heroes in general, their designs are all so cool, I'd use them in real life if they didn't suck.

Favourite moment they were in

The Saio / Edo duel. I especially love how he gave it his absolute all to save Saio and still failed, it makes the duel even more meaningful to me.

Least favourite moment

Edo gets about as much screentime in Season 3 and 4 as everyone else, but like I hate the fact he never wins another duel after Season 2 when his introduction was beating Judai and Ryo. Literally Bloo-D is such a good card, and every time he summons it he loses.

[demigod-of-the-agni]

NOTE: this is an old draft that does not reflect my current ideas but I liked the thoughts behind it so I'm posting it anyway. You can find my new updated thoughts here.

If Pavitr had to have a job/role from the FFXIV universe, he'd be a dark knight.

Like yes he's going to be a part of the emo edgelord gang and wield a big, grim-looking sword. He's going to be dressed in black, pointy armour and everything, be all moody and foreboding and lonely and covered in blood and absolutely livid and drenched in gore and viscera and the miasma of suffering. He's dressed in the skin of a killer.

Agni, that doesn't sound like it'd fit Pavitr. He's a kind guy so he'd probably be a healer!! He's cracking jokes!! He's so friendly!! He's lovely and he gets along with everyone!! Why would he be a dark knight?

In the context of what ATSV has built up regarding the Spider Society/mentors, as well as drawing upon how Indian culture approaches mental health, I genuinely think the dark knight job matches Pavitr to a tee. Lemme break it down for you [break dances].

SPOILERS for the DARK KNIGHT QUESTS.

The dark knight job is... if "with great power, there must also come great responsibility" delighted to get its hands bloody. It's a tank job, meaning at its very core its about protecting the party no matter the costs, and "no matter the costs" is pretty big for the dark knight specifically, because it means you have to dig deep for the darkness that lies within every heart and soul.

And like all Spider-Men, Pavitr is riddled with darkness — drowning in guilt, his regrets (losing Bhim Uncle, a father figure, a mentor), and after what went down in ATSV, with the collider and Mumbattan falling apart? Suddenly there's a lot of fear thrown into the mix, if whether he'll be able to do his job of protecting. If he's even good at it; after all, he was too busy having fun and being carefree to handle the Spot. He was called in as backup, he was called in to provide support, he was called in to help others but he failed.

He is the blade of virtue and righteousness. He is to sever the threads of evil, to cut wrongdoers down before they even have a chance to strike.

And one night, there's a little blood on his hands. Just a little, not enough to soak his entire fist, but it's enough to stain the ground an ugly red.

And at first Pavitr is horrified — Spider-Man was never supposed to go this far. He was not supposed to kill. Spider-Man never kills. (But he's the blade of virtue and righteousness. Blades are very good at killing.)

Conflicting emotions keep him from really finding help — Spider Society, and its twisted perception of mentors? Miguel's strict code and Peter B.'s nonchalance don't make good foundations for seeking help. And while Jessica is by far the most suitable adult there to actually provide support, Pavitr never gives her the chance, because Indian boys don't have problems. Their issues are theirs to handle on their own, because they're men, they're independent, and any showcase of vulnerability is a sign of weakness. It means you are crippled and you are worthless and you are undeserving of others.

And so Pavitr is left to stew in his own madness. He doesn't divulge any of his miseries, his sorrows, his fears, he doesn't say anything to the bruises on his fists or the metallic pang of steel that follows him everywhere. He hides it with a smile, of course, because Indian boys look nicer when they smile, are pleasant and approachable and are a sign that they have been raised right. Pavitr's a nice boy, the aunties say amongst themselves. He'll grow up a right young man and help the world in many ways.

But with every outing as a hero, Pavitr comes back feeling like a fraud. He's a murderer, an unanchored soul who can't keep up with his body, a dulled blade who gifts suffering instead of a quick demise. It's also then, when he's balancing on the knife's edge of darkness, that he finds the dead knight in the shadows of Mumbattan's abandoned foundational infrastructure.

Pavitr has been finding many dead folk recently — which is no surprise, death follows him wherever he goes — but he's surprised to see the knight come back to life, 'claiming his mortal wounds were nothing but a scratch. And the knight, oh, he knows Pavitr is hurting, is aching, is drenched in so much blood that he doesn't even know what to do with himself. And he offers his aid — one bloodied soul to another. I'll help you tame that darkness, the knight promises, I'll offer my blade so that you may become my pupil, a true blade of virtue and righteousness.

Pavitr can't say no to that.

[crayonpac]

Long time, no post.

If you're here, and I have no idea why you would be, you've probably read something bad about me from when I was in middle/high school years ago that my stalker or groomer and their friends posted on a callout blog that has genuinely ruined my life.

A few things first.

Don't call me Tr!ckster or T%ny. I consider both of those deadnames.

Please don't use they/them for me. My only pronouns systemwide are it/its. Please don't call me a person, call me a thing. If you can't do that you don't get to talk about me.

Most of the people I was friends with during the events of the callout, like @raystarkitty , I have cut ties with.

For the love of god, please don't reupload or edit any pictures or gifs of my dog or pictures of my face.

I'm not going to sit here and act like I'm not innocent, because as someone who had a chance to grow up a little I realized that I did hurt quite a few people.

To those people, I am genuinely sorry and if you want an apology this inbox will be open for a bit if you'd like to ask for one. I am not going to message anyone spontaneously because I want to respect boundaries. There are also some people I will never apologize to.

I also realized a lot of people who were and weren't involved were totally weird about me being an edgelord about all this. A lot of people who were involved or wanted to see The Drama™ were generally cruel and really fucking racist towards me.

I get that some of the things I actually did, like bothering a few people who genuinely didn't deserve it, was wrong, but there was no reason to edit my skin white or go to where I used to live and go to school and take photos looking inside the windows of my bedroom at the time, and posting my number on here and kiwifarms.

There's a lot more things that have happened, including several people trying (and succeeding) to contact my abusive family or call CPS on a friend of mine because I said "hi" to their kid on call every once and awhile, or purposefully using my very much real schizophrenia and OCD against me regarding numbers and false doomsdays and using my very obscure trigger and CSA trauma against me.

That was fucking weird to do to someone who was barely out of high school.

I could sit here and talk about how the blog came up with a mirad of false accusations, like the many involving me abusing my 13yo ESA or me sexually assaulting people, some I haven't met IRL ever, or how I am allegedly faking my disability despite there being recorded proof of me being a victim of police brutality.

The entirety of @herocallout and @stationarchive was a smear campaign that never attempted to do research into what accusations were true, and which weren't. They wanted quantity over quality in regards to testimonials.

Because, yes. The abusive woman who raised me DID know about the blog, and submit to it, and check it frequently. My college at the time has pulled me in for questioning about posts about I'm apparently a nazi despite converting to Judaism. This very much had an impact on my offline life and still does.

I'm not saying any of my actions were okay, especially the ones I actually committed. I am quite literally not the person I was when the events of that blog unfolded (because we're a system and that alter was integrated with therapy). I'm also not going to say that I'm the only victim.

Hopefully the few people that were involved that shouldn't have been have moved on and gotten better and I apologize again for my actions. I can't change the past, but I hope you can recover.

I'm not going to link my other socials because I don't want to be harassed. Have a good one, I guess.

[krippe90]

1, 6, 12, 14, 15, 17, 20, 22, 24, 25, 26, 30, 35 😘

Bruh...

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are? Growing up lonely, fat, and asocial during my formative years probably.

6. what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator? I don't really consider myself an online personlity or creator or anything. Best things about being online: Funny memes and people in my computah! Worst thing: Wasting away life doing nothing that really matters in the end.

12. what’s some good advice you want to share? "Keep Cool, Never freeze". I read that on a ketchup bottle. Best advice I ever got.

14. what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do? Shit, I dunno. I do what I want mostly. Maybe asking girls out?

15. what do you think of when you hear the word “home”? House where my bed and PC is.

17. name 3 things that make you happy Tits, pussy and weed, lmao. But seriously, probably making other people laugh should be in there as well.

20. favourite things about the night? The isolation. I like taking walks at night for that reason. It's like another world.

22. say 3 things about someone you love I'm not "in love" with anyone at the moment, but I'll say something about a friend: She's super kind, got a nice butt, and is a demon in the kitchen (affectionately)

24. what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for? Already answered this but taking up a new hobby of painting shit!

25. fave season and why? Winter. It's cozy and chilly and dark and christmas time always feel a little nicer than any other time of the year.

26. fave colour and why? Black. Cause it goes with everything and is slimming! Also I'm an edgelord like that I suppose.

30. what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier? This was a hard one cause I'm bad at making myself happier I guess. But I'm always in a better mood when I have had a Lucid Dream the night before. Also taking LSD can help when I feel especially down tbh.

35. do you trust easily? Yeah, up until trust is broken. Very hard to get back if you fuck it up with me

There, easy!

[m34gs]

Tag Game:

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers:

Thanks to @voxofthevoid for tagging me 💜💜💜 I loved all your answers btw. (also sorry I haven't been doing a lot of tag games lately; if I don't get the notification at the exact moment I have both time and motivation, it tends to not get done...😅)

How many works do you have on AO3? Currently I have 87 posted fics!

What's your total AO3 word count? 589 678

What fandoms do you write for? Currently I am actively writing for: Blue exorcist, Twisted Wonderland, Bleach, and Haikyuu!! I also have fics posted for: BNHA, JJK, Fire Force, and Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc I am planning to post more fics in some of those fandoms again, and I have more I would like to eventually write for :)

What are your top five fics by kudos? This was interesting for me; since I don't usually organize my stats by kudos...lol! United - BNHA Hogwarts AU (first fic I started posting on AO3...kinda surprised because I haven't touched this one in almost a year...I just really lost a lot of my motivation to work on anything related to HP, however loosely it may be...though I guess this might have the most simply because it's my oldest) The Ones You Lose are the Ones I See - BNHA au where Izuku has a quirk that allows him to see ghosts (again; surprised...I haven't had much time/energy/motivation to work on this one either) Lost - Haikyuu!! mer au; Shouyou gets lost from his pod and has to find his way back home. I wrote this one in my first 2 years of writing on AO3...I was very into Haikyuu at the time lol. The Sushi Protocol - Fire Force, Part of the Bar AU @kimium and I came up with together. Licht has some very poor dietary habits and once Companies 7 and 8 catch on, they intervene. Unforgiving Winter - BNHA AU where Katsuki and Izuku get stuck outside in the cold as children. (heed tags and warnings)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I do! I love interacting with people who enjoyed my writing, and I like to discuss my ideas, so it's a win-win when I get a lovely comment and then get to discuss the fic in more depth with someone!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hmmm, probably Unforgiving Winter (as listed above). I think that's the one I've gotten the most comments about breaking people's hearts on. That being said, angst is subjective and I've got more than a few angsty fics (my friends know I was an edgelord child at heart even if I wasn't allowed to show it and I have only gotten worse with my angsty bullshit hahaha)

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Not 100% sure. Probably Three Orange Hearts (Haikyuu UshiHina Youtuber AU)? I think that was one of my happiest fics and it has a pretty fluffy and happy ending for me. But, to be honest maybe someone has a different opinion. I started writing more fluffy/happy fics because of @kimium. (she challenged me to do so and I love her for constantly helping me grow in my writing)

Do you get hate on fic? I wouldn't classify it as hate, but once in a while I will get a comment that is worded rudely or sounds like they're criticizing how I've written characters. Usually for those I either ask for clarification because I may have misread the tone or explain what thoughts go into why the character is acting that way. I mean, when it comes to critique on how I've written the characters...the bottom line is I write them the way that makes sense to me and makes me happy, so I always will say if someone doesn't like the way I've done it they can always write the idea their way and have fun with it. Most times this clears up any misunderstandings and I feel like it encourages communication and learning. I don't like to feel like I've lashed out at someone, it makes me feel bad.

Do you write smut? Yes :D and unless you're one of my trusted adult friends who ask me where it is, you will never find out where I post it. Mwaahahahahaha

Do you write crossovers? Yup! The Glorious Bar AU is a giant crossover of all the fandoms @kimium and I decide to mash together! And I am currently working on my first AO3 contribution to our Sort of Saw Franchise AU for Twisted Wonderland. I hope to post it soon! (see my pinned post for links to all the asks where Kim and I have discussed this AU!)

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge...but I've also locked down all my fics because of the AI scraping bullshit

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! I was very honoured!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Currently Kim and I are co-writers for the Bar AU and the Saw AU! It's not necessarily one fic, but multiple fics in the same AU gathered in series!

What's your all-time favourite ship? I'm not sure if I have an overall favourite that I like more than all my other favourite ships...Right now, I'm really into Kalim/Idia from Twisted Wonderland. It makes me happy and I have been writing a lot for them.

What's a wip you want to finish but probably won't? I hate to label anything as "never going to finish" because I honestly always have plans to finish a story. I don't know if I have the heart to say I probably won't finish one. I do have a lot that I have taken a long break from though.

What are your writing strengths? I've had people tell me they really love how I write characters in fics, and that they enjoy my worldbuilding in AUs; I like to think those are my strengths.

What are your writing weaknesses? Scenery and describing it. I almost always have to go back and tweak things a little to make sure I didn't forget to include enough of the setting; but I am getting better at it.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I would not feel confident enough to do most languages as full conversations (maybe a little German? though the Duolingo Owl probably feels otherwise based on how long it's been since my last lesson...) but I could probably manage a few phrases if a characters says something in another language in canon (like Rook Hunt).

First fandom you wrote for? Ever? Ever ever? I wrote a few chapters of a One Direction fanfic when I was 15 and it will never see the light of day again. I deleted it...lol. It wasn't posted on AO3, since I wasn't on the archive at that time.

Favourite fic you've written? I don't choose favourites among my children... (Right now it's A Different Kind of Magic; a multichapter Kalim/Idia fanfic set in an AU where Idia has to teach Kalim and Jamil to master their magic before it consumes them)

Well that was fun! I don't know if I have 20 writer friends/mutuals who are actively writing/posting fics to tag (who also haven't already been tagged...lol), so I'll tag the ones I can think of! If I miss you or you see this and want to join in, feel free!!

@kimium (sorry for tagging you so many times in this post lmfao), @collisiondiscourse, @sailormew4, @iluvmilkchoco, @vermillionair13, and anyone else who wants to join! No pressure, it's all for fun if you want to do it! 💜💜💜

[tearsoftime0086]

Uhhhh so while I'm distracting myself from finishing my fic, here's a ton of random headcanons for a steve burnside lives au and what would happen after they get off the island (aka writing notes that i will never get to bc holy heck does wesker not having t-veronica change things)

The fact that steve's not vaccinated nor inoculated means that they do a data scrape for potential cures of the Antarctica facility before they blow it up (I'm thinking the explosives come from the contingency plan alexander had)

Chris showed up on the island with a two seat fighter jet. Steve and Claire get some sleepy snuggles in the back seat

Why didn't wesker show up in the intermediary? Uhh good question - probs bc to him steve's still a walking b.o.w and much more difficult to retrieve

Chris, claire, and steve debrief a little on the way back for alibi matching, what to reveal/hide. Obvs the main topic is how much they tell about steve's t-veronica. There's a lot of physical signs, so it's a tough situation

They land somewhere in australia for a few days to get their bearings. Claire gets in contact with Leon, who's INSISTENT they don't get USSTRATCOM too involved. He's still feeling guilty over how everything with sherry went

Meanwhile Steve's still rattled over the whole thing and is even more unnerved when the injuries heal over (except the veins) - the three of them talk about sherry and jill, but steve's starting to be more convinced he needs some kind of serious help

(As for how this all actually resolves??? That is a problem for future me, or anyone else who's reading this post haha)

They eventually land back in the states, and claire meets up with sherry. They confide in each other and the topic of steve comes up. He ends up tagging along next time, to when sherry inconspiciously mentions that he looks like a derpy version of leon. Steve's irked until he does finally see a picture of leon and has to be like "wow you're right. This guy's handsome as hell"

Sherry and him connect over their shared infection woes, so he becomes the "derpy uncle" of their little family

Chris doubles his energy with Jill on founding the BSAA and amassing their trusted contacts with the additional pressure of someday getting steve fully stable. Although the two started on rough footing, chris grows fond of him (obvs playing the big bro role to claire once they start formally being in a relationship)

Speaking of the relationship, claire finds steve clamming up about a lot of it once they're back. He thinks there'll never be a "normal way to say it" bc well.. everything. They work it out eventually, get that dinner, watch that movie

Steve grows out of a lot of his edgelord tendencies, esp since the virus makes him realize how big the whole bioterrorism business is. Probs a few scary scrapes w being an active controller of a t virus strain. Still says a lot of loud, half -thought out things tho

He probably lands in a role as like a civilian consultant for the bsaa. Works with rebecca on research. Claire feels tense sometimes that both chris and steve are so intricately tied to the bsaa and their line of duty, but understands why they do it.

Lots of impromptu dates and catch-ups as they all travel a lot (esp claire for terrasave). It's tough sometimes, but they're happy and they always make it work

Anyway this concludes my denial of code veronica's ending. Thank you to anyone who makes it this far lol

[gaykarstaagforever]

I watched (500) Days of Summer, which I never saw. In 2009 I was at least the generational target for this, in that I'm around the same age as JGL and Zooey Deschanel. I think I missed it because at the time I was too edgelord for what were marketed as romantic comedies. Plus it gave off serious Zach Braff indie hipster energy and I was out of that phase and annoyed by it by like 2005.

I remember discourse on here about it more recently than that. Which makes sense, because it is a pretty good movie I think everyone in their mid-20s (especially men) can immediately relate to. Sad that those men probably won't see it like I didn't, because they are too X for movies without blue sky beams.

The cast is good and it is well-constructed, with only a couple awkward things. Narration wasn't necessary even if I know why it was there (evidence of main character Tom's view of himself as the star of the world). And the movie doesn't need to keep stopping to explain what it is trying to say (at least, not to me, because I am super-smart and never entirely miss the point of a movie). But I like the non-linear progression and the unexpected surrealist moments, like the dance number with the animated birds, and the parody French New Wave movie.

The ENTIRE MOVIE is peering into and out through Tom's perspective of reality, and he is a kid pretending to be an adult who can't feel anything without it consuming him. What he thinks he knows is just media tropes he has consumed and egotistically forgotten didn't come from reflecting on his own experiences. He considers himself the player character in a video game where anything he does with other people is only a success when he "wins" something. He takes relationship advice from his little sister as if she were Yoda, because she is precocious and eager and he is too immature to know the difference between that and actual insight.

And none of this is bad or makes him a bad person. This is simply a complex definition of being young. Tom is young, and doesn't know how young he is, and is annoying and emotionally manipulative because of that. And aren't we, weren't we, all? Growing up is growing through that and learning to laugh at the emo baby goon you were.

Now, my question is, does the movie know that? I'm not sure. Sometimes it seems to appreciate how Tom is the cause of and solution to all of his problems. Other times it seems as if trapped itself in Tom's pissy sexist immaturity, blaming Summer and society and the media for why pretty girls are impenetrable mysteries who don't ever get how intense male creepiness is what devotion IS, dammit!

It was like the screenplay was written by a guy who was almost over a divorce. But not quite. And while that may be an emotionally honest tone, it muddles what I think they were hoping to show. Not that Tom isn't in his way a victim, as we all are, of the times and places in which we live, and of the whims of other people. But the degree to which that matters seems far more irrelevant here, where it is clear that the great bulk of Tom's issues are him being a desperate selfish man-baby who thinks of women as trophies and toys to satisfy his need for play.

A movie from Summer's perspective would be very different. She is young and selfish too, but also demonstrates a healthy self-acceptance. She knows who she is, more or less, and knows what she is about, more or less. ...Until she doesn't. But that isn't flightiness or mysterious feminine wiles. That's a person doing life. We are ALL like that. Summer seems to understand that about herself, at least better than Tom does about anyone.

But again, the fact that the movie has named her Summer, and Tom meets Autumn at the end and appears poised to go off not treating another woman as an actual person, tells me the movie itself is, at least in part, as not self-aware as Tom. And that is a little frustrating.

If you are yourself a young man, or an old man who never grew up, and haven't figured it out yet, women are humans with human feelings. They are only mysterious because you aren't paying attention to them and are holding them to a standard where you expect them to be the solution to your emotional problems. And that is YOU, not them. And how can you expect to ever love or be loved by them, when you aren't regarding them as people? Because love is between two people. If one of them isn't a person to the other one, whatever there is will never be love.

I don't think Tom learns that, and neither does the movie, even when it shows his expectations vs his reality at Summer's engagement party.

...Which, okay. Yes. Summer should have told him that was what it was. But this is all from Tom's perspective. Maybe she tried and he wasn't paying attention, as usual, too caught up in his own doggedly persistent obsession with being coupled to her.

(500) Days of Summer is at least an accurate portrayal of what it is like to be a young dummy in love. It is valuable in that, and has some wisdom to impart about the foibles of that. I just wish it was as smart as it hopes to be. Because the world is cruel and imperfect, and Summer used Tom in a way he clearly couldn't handle, and she should probably not have done that. But what Tom is doing to her is way worse, and what he is doing to HIMSELF is, while inevitable, his biggest problem of all.

An interesting movie, at any rate. Worth exploring.

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

hi, latest anon again 👉👈

the character i was referring to was Dazai from Bungo Stray Dogs. i have an entire ass google doc about him having ASPD, so it's safe to say i am normal about this!

YEAHhh the stigma is soooooo rampant. i have NPD so i like... also feel that. if i took a shot anytime i saw some bullshit about NPD id die of alcohol poisoning i think. maybe one day everyone will get it through their heads that we aren't evil despicable monsters!!! ...and if it doesnt happen quick, i think ill start my narc abuse arc (/j /j /j /j /j please dont get my ass.. its sensitive :[ ..)

literally soooooo true. everyday my spine SHATTERS from the sheer weight i have to put on it because of my correct opinions and takes

also yeasss! brothers in arms across fandom lines!! shaking ur hand 🤝🤝🤝

DAZAI!!!!!!!!!!

OF COURSE ITS DAZAI!!!

i dont even GO there (yet..... ;) )BUT from what ive seen.... yeah. yeagh. its obvious. its SO obvious. ur like me from another timeline where instead of drr i was into bsd... we even type a lot alike :sob:

(i am Not copypastin emojis now that im on my laptop ongod)

ALSO.....BUDDIES!!! i have that good ol aspd/npd double fisting going on altho i tend to talk more abt the aspd bc AT LEAST the online npd community has braincells and actively works to say the stereotype is stupid HOWEVER a good 50 to 75% of the online aspd community seems to go full edgelord and actively try to conform to the stereotype as hard as Fucking possible and if you find that behavior stupid and annoying, well, then you're a Fake Aspd and need to get reevaluated

so it was way easier for me to accept the npd rather than the aspd because at least theres.... some kind of level headed community out there that thinks the stereotypes are bullshit. its like yea yea the time knife we've all seen it lmfao

god i hate narc abuse rhetoric!! at this point im done trying to explain why its ableist and wanna start going "L + ratio + i hope you get abused some more + shut up + you Will abuse your kids and they Will never talk to you again when they grow up. if they even survive that long" at these people but im like.... no. calm down. theyll just use this against the entire disorder.

also i get anxious being mean bc like. what if they're mean back :( im very mockable. my main url is Tulpa Fucker for godssake and if u stalk that blog enough u WILL find out if its ironic or unironic + more weird n wacky things to make fun of me over! i dont wanna be mocked :( i need to b in control :(( i cant just say fuck it to Harsh Word Exchanges and start blasting on the inter net now can i? i cant! so whyyyy bother~

but ya im rly looking forward to the day when ppl will like. acknowledge our humanity <3 praying it comes soon but probably not~ ! :(

[deliciouskeys]

Yay! Lots of numbers below, feel free to pick and choose :)

16, 26, 39 (I think you *know* which particular scene I want a snippet of, but anything will do haha), 69, 76 for ZM

Thanks for the asks. I warn you, the following is verbose and references morally reprehensible fics. TW, lol.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

I have many if just vague ideas count! And I'm sure you'll be pleased that they all revolve around Homelander, one way or another lol. I hate "claiming" prompts on the Meow meow prompt jar because it feels like hogging it unless I'm going to be actively writing, but I did just sign up for your "fertility treatment" prompt. My brain is often eaten up by the idea of HL being happily pregnant, and really self-satisfied to the point of being annoying. Meanwhile Butcher's probably kind of worried-- not like HL's going to be able to get a C section, at least not through conventional means. HL's blithely all 'we'll cross that bridge when we get there.' He's just enthused about getting to use a breast pump in the near future, and probably the fact that the baby he has is going to adore him unconditionally.

Yes, I am gross.

26. Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Hrm. Unfortunately the wildest ride is still probably the first fic I ever posted publicly. Originally on LJ. 51k words. 12 chapters. Of... me being a teenage edgelord and writing about Captain Hook privateprisoning a prepubertal boy, that's not ever going to grow up, as if the chanslash wasn't bad enough.

Anyway, I skimmed through this fic about a year ago just to recall what was in it again, and I had forgotten just how fucked that story is, beyond even the pairing premise itself. There's gangrape of a child, ye olde macabre medical horror, and severe emotional trauma and manipulation/gaslighting that leads to really inappropriate bonding. But it did have impressive levels of worldbuilding, and pretty intricate dynamics between the, um, leads, but also side characters. It was a very rich environment. I was "1 or 2 chapters away from finishing it" and then never did, because, damn that thing was hard to wrap up in a not-completely-disturbing ending. I still occasionally get requests to finish it and people are subscribed, but I would not be able to get back into whatever mindset I had at that age. "Wildest" ! = "good" lol, but I'd never delete it.

Don't judge me for what i was doing ~20 years ago D:

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

Heh, full disclosure I criiiinge posting snippets of my fics because they're so awkward out of context, it's like walking in in the middle of sex. But here you go, from a section you asked for. I wish I just had this done and posted to AO3 -__-

Homelander probably senses the hesitation and decides to get himself up to a kneeling position, tilting his face up, licking his lips invitingly, probably hoping to defuse and redirect the weird energy in the room into something sexual rather than violent.

"Oh no you don't." Instead of undoing his fly, Butcher hoists Homelander up to his feet and pulls him out of the cage and towards the breakfast nook. "Lie down across my lap," he commands once he's situated himself in a chair.

"Why did you--" Homelander's words catch in his throat as Butcher yanks him down to lie across his lap, not waiting for obedience. "…take Temp V?" He sounds worried, and tries to lift his head, only to get his shoulders shoved back down.

The first thwack across Homelander's ass sounds really loud, echoing off the walls of the living room. Butcher gave it his all, somewhat forgetting that his strength was amped up. His palm smarts and he can only guess what it feels like on the receiving end. Homelander doesn't make a sound, maybe too shocked. Butcher swats him again.

"Really? This is just childi—" Another thwack resounds across the room and Homelander breathes hard through his nose. "That hurts, you know," he hisses.

"Yeah, that's the general idea. I know no one probably ever punished you while you were growing up, so it must be a new concept…" Butcher trails off, suddenly recalling the photocopied lab notes from Vought and realizing what he's saying is uncharitable.

Homelander doesn't argue, just lets out a strained whimper when Butcher's next whack lands square on the place he hit the first time. Angry red splotches are forming on his skin, helpfully marking out where he's already been hit and where he hasn't.

69. What work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

I'm not embarrassed per se, but I probably should be (if by nothing else than the sheer length of these three). Original dates, reposted to AO3 later.

2003- 51k chanslash mentioned in the previous question

2006 - 21k of working through some angst issues. Original work set in WWII Germany, also starts out underage although at least postpubertal,  problematic and historically inaccurate

2008- 59k of Pineapple Express mpreg, although I do recommend that movie to anyone who likes implied gayness in media and bizarre, funny dialogue which was a fun challenge to try to emulate in fic

76. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [ZM]?

I have generally managed to get everything into ZM that I wanted! One longish sequence I remember discarding (no mourning) was HL goading Billy to take Temp V with some form of misbehavior, and that being the thing that finally tips them into an overtly sexual, rather than a covertly-in-denial-kinky, relationship. It was violence that ended up as sex. But it was pretty rapey, and I didn't like it for this pairing. I prefer the version posted, where they're almost accidentally upping the ante, and kind of mutually sexually harassing each other, and it's about as consensual as it can be, at least within a private prison setting.

Plus Temp V does make an appearance towards the end of the fic, as you can tell from the WIP snippet lol.

[eldritch-spouse]

[Dorem asks below]

Exactly as planned. (*steeples fingers*)

If you can crush a soul into the shape of a bagel without making it splinter into a trillion pieces, and possibly lose your hands in the process, consider Dorem quite impressed. But generally, no, Dorem doesn't eat. He's been powering himself through excess souls for a long while now. Perhaps, if he's bored enough, he'll claw the flesh off the lower part of his face so he can taste something again.

Just as it's not recommended that you stare into his eyes for too long, it's also ill-advised to place your hand in the vacuum space of his split torso. You may grasp his bones, he does have sensory input from them, but massages aren't very effective, no.

He's very confused by your sexual advances. What went wrong in humanity's evolution, that you would look at a harbinger of death, a collector of souls, and lust for him? Your bravery is amusing. If you're so determined, then reach for it, show him what a depraved mess your species has become.

[Ahh, that's very flattering, thenk. ////]

It's funny you say that, I spent so much time going back and forth on this guy (especially regarding coloration) that I ended up totally unmotivated by end. I was close to not even showing him and starting from scratch because I just wasn't feeling it. I'm glad he hits the spot though!

I'll need to warm up to him.

I've thought of a couple possibilities. Of course, this can only happen after the initial stages of lore I have for him.

One such case is that you're going to die soon. For some reason or another. Maybe you know it, maybe you don't, but you're fated to perish not too far from the present. During his time on Earth, Dorem finds himself almost instinctively approaching those who are ready to die. He's not exactly meant for "field work" such as this, but some primal directive tells him to harness the soul of those who are very close to parting. It's likely he finds you before you find him. He'll watch you from the shadows of your own home, waiting. Nornally, Dorem would just touch you, pluck the self right out of your husk, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. You seemed innocent, or perhaps he was just amused by you, eitherway, the monster decided to wait until you died naturally.

Except, in all that time that he spends watching you, Dorem grows attached, grows selfish, enough so that when the moment of your death comes and he's left hovering over your corpse, holding it, he becomes disturbed. Death has never frightened or bothered him. In fact, death is his life, his work. It is as natural as the air you breathe. So why does your death feel wrong? Distressing? Dorem pushes the newly released soul gently back into your being.

You return with a cut-off shriek, the air in your lungs frozen while you take in the sight of him. Similarly, Dorem himself freezes like a statue at the realization that he's enamored... Better get used to his oppressive, shiver-inducing touch, because it's all you'll be feeling now.

Alternatively, I like to picture a goofier scenario where you're part of one of the few cults spread around Earth who worship the so-fabled ruler of the undead. Those cults are probably a tad cringy, full of undead, cheesy goth types and edgelords- Dorem's disgusted honestly, but your persistence to go out of your way to bug him, the genuine admiration your eyes, the way you claim to be in servitude of him. It gets in his head, scratches an itch or two. Well, if you so charmingly proclaim to want to serve him in life and death, then maybe he should test you.

[byanyan]

ㅤFor muns with multiple muses, past and present, on any blog. Fill out the form according to which muse suits each title best. (The same muse can have multiple titles.) Repost and tag. Feel free to add more!

ㅤ— just me casually referencing byan along with my two boys over on @nagweon. could i include my canon muses? sure, probably. but i'm an oc guy now.

Favorite Muse: ...b-byan (don't tell the boys)

Most Character Development: also byan. despite being the newest, they've had so much more of my attention and thus more time to develop.

Trash Muse: byan, duh. absolute shitchild (affectionate)

The Meme-Lord: still byan

Most Likely to Start a War: again, byan. they're too violence-inclined to not take this one.

Worst Personality: okay this is getting repetitive now. byan. the other two are like, actually good people with more positive traits than negative ones

Best Singer: hmm... byan if they put the effort in, otherwise si-u?

Most Attractive Muse: asjdksjf two of my muses are minors (even if their fcs aren't), so we'll go with minjoon. if we were to go based more on fc though... this might change. maybe. stop looking at me like that

Biggest Heart: i wanna say si-u, but it's probably minjoon. he's just that tiny bit more empathetic and a lot more forgiving. forgiving to a fault, a lot of the time.

Falls in Love Quickest: none of them fall very quickly, but considering he has the least amount of trust issues... probably minjoon.

Most Likely to Drop Their Phone in the Toilet: joon again tbh. he's not even that clumsy, but he is a little careless

Ice Ruler: ...si-u? where byan runs hot when angry, si-u runs cold

The Edgelord: obviously byan. punkass knife kid who picks fights and hates the world.

Most Tragic Backstory: i'd say both the orphans are pretty equally tied. if we were to go based on verse though, i'd say si-u is the more tragic one in undercity verse and byan is just a little more tragic in modern verse

Best Case of Puberty: ...byan. v babyfaced kid who grows into... i mean. *gestures at jk*

Most Awkward: si-u, for sure

Busy Bee: joon, probably! the only adult and only one with a job lmao

Most Clueless: byan? byan. v lowkey thembo energy

Most Likely to Forget Their Wallet at Home: joon. byan is too obsessive about their things and si-u is too AnxiousTM to forget anything

Best Dressed: byan wins this one by default as the only one who cares about what they wear. but they're also very fashionable in their own eccentric, cutesy, punky way

Biggest Flirt: byan. flirting is a weapon they wield to get what they want

Most Dramatic: byan once again

Least Likely to Show Up Late: si-u. the other two literally just don't care about being late.

One with Weirdest Habit: that's actually a hard one... it's gotta be byan or minjoon. joon lets his familiar answer the door and byan will spontaneously give themself a tattoo just about anywhere or paint their nails in an alley while jamming to music. ...it's probably byan.

Most Likely to Be Caught at the Gym: byan by default as the only one who remotely cares about fitness. they may or may not actually start going to the gym in their college verse too tbh, haven't decided yet. the other two though? never. both for very different reasons.

tagged by:ㅤ@babyitsmagic ty!! ♡