#when months later my grandpa was on his death bed in the hospital

[freebooter4ever]

also, i can preach 'just swallow the panic and fear and insecurity' but the harsh truth is being in LA and having the artist's house become a second home...this is the first time ever i've had a steady constant source of reassurance and someone telling me 'you can do this keep going'. i dont think i could have done any of this without my friend's support. a huge part of my passion for teaching and making gaming programs to help kids while i was in pittsburgh was me remembering not having a lot of emotional support as a kid/teen. for me my escape in childhood was in teaching myself how to code html/css/java and to use that to create my own websites centering around my silly zelda and neopets fanart (hello elliot alderson origin story lmao). my introduction to it was a bright colorful 'lissa explains it all' website that then led me to studying more in depth about programming languages. decades later my nonprofit research team was a more advanced version of that.

and having finally experienced how much different life is when you do have that encouragement as an adult only cements my determination that tools that empower kids (in general but most importantly those who don't have this positive support) in storytelling and creating on their own volition are so important. with all due respect to my old research mentor, kids who do not have the strength and support behind them that others do should not be forced to knock down brick walls just to reach their goals. that was what our project was about for me: opening doors for kids.

if there's one thing im learning in the job search its how to swallow that welling bubble of adhd rejection sensitivity and remind myself that even though it all feels personal because my whole life is centered around my career and sculpting work and i dont really have an identity outside that....its not personal to the people looking at my work and i shouldnt take their reaction that way.

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

I can't stop thinking about the Kurokawa siblings in the OG-timeline

Of course, Tokyo Revengers manga spoilers, be aware!!!

Okay, bare with me because I'm gonna try to explain my point. Maybe I'm just trying to cope with Tenjiku animated because just thinking that Emma and Izana never saw each other in this time-line broke me.

(always broke me, but the anime is re-opening the wound >.< )

(I'm just blaiming this freaking and sad openning)

We all know what will happen in this time-line, right? But I always wished that in some other time-line, Izana kept his promise, that he come back to Emma. Because he promised to her and there is no way that I could believe that in a time-line where his not blinded by his rage to Mikey, he will not try to find Emma.

Okay, we all know this, right? Here is where my theory starts (remember, this is me coping).

What we actually know about the Original time-line? (besides is fuck up xD)

Mikey's accident was the 30th of July in 1999.

Mikey's death the 20th of July 4 years later, in 2003.

We also know that in the other time-lines, Shinichiro came to see Izana at the orphanage when Izana was around ten years old, so in 1997 (also, Shinichiro still have his high-school uniform and looks like a teenager, what makes sense because his supposed to be seventeen there).

We also know that grandpa Sano is death and Emma ran away from home. What is fucking tragic and concerning because in that moment Emma is only 11 years old (her birthday is on November).

(yes, I put a lot of kid Izana because his adorable and he deserves the world xD)

So, here goes my theory:

Izana probably started to freak out when suddenly Shinichiro stopped visiting him and writing him letters. Probably, in some point, Shin wrote him a short letter explaining that Manjiro was sick and he had to take care of him (maybe it's being months since the accident, the canon show us that Shinichiro was only focused on Manjiro after the accident).

We can all imagine how that felt for Izana. Remember that he's still a kid, twelve years old, so he doesn't understand the gravity of Manjiro's situation. He just feels like his being replaced. So, in some point, Izana snaps.

I can totally picture kid Izana going to the hospital to see Shinichiro (probably follow by a poor Kakucho that even being the smaller, knows this is a terrible idea). Maybe Izana wanted to confront Shinichiro, maybe he wanted to confront Mikey (he doesn't know his real state). But once he see Mikey's room, once he see the reality of what happened... He just can't be mad. Because he's a kid with mental health problems and his seeing the non-brother that he wanted to hate paralyzed in a hospital bed. So he will probably have an emotional breakdown.

So in my head-canon, he starts visiting the hospital more. Never showing to Shinichiro that he was there, always trying to keep it a secret, even if he doesn't understand why (Izana being obssessive is canon, we know).

In some of this secret-visits... He sees Emma. And Emma sees him. Remember, they are still kids, maybe it's being a year or two since the accident, so 2000, 2001? Izana will be fourteen, Emma ten. So it's awkward at the beginning, but they start to talk.

I can picture them walking in the gardens of the hospital, being uncomfortable with each other at the beginning. But slowly, Izana starts to remember his little sister. His promise to came back for her. And Emma is clearly not being taking care by Shinichiro at this point (not judging Shin, it is what it is)

So, when grandpa Sano dies, who was the only adult taking care of Emma... Emma didn't just ran away. Izana took her. Izana came back for Emma and refused to let her in and empty house with an absent brother and the ghost of the other. We already know that Izana took Kakucho from the orphanage when he went out of juviee, so this is not out of character for him. Izana would do the same for Emma if he ever saw her being neglected in the original time-line.

So yeah, I found the time-line where the Kurokawa siblings story doesn't end up that freaking traumatic.

In the original time-line, Izana came back for Emma, he keep his promise.

(so now I'm going to pretend this is canon and not cry with Emma in Tenjiku)

[housamo-stories]

MC's accident Chapter 4 (Housamo)

Somewhere in Kabukicho in an abandoned warehouse some transients are partying and laughing, one of them says "play it again" then howls with laughter as they watch the same video over and over of a high school student getting run down by a black sedan the transient then says "again man that shit just never gets old" he begins laughing once more as his friend replays the video, the two transients are sitting on the hood of a black sedan with no license plate, the two continue to admire their handiwork as they play the video over and over again the other transient asks his friend if the kid died, "I hope so if they did we'll be legends man, we'll be known as the guys who took out MC leader of the Shinjuku summoners" his friend smiles at the thought of them having a large gang and all of them ruling all of Tokyo, just then a news update appears on both of their phones it reads that the hit and run victim survived and is in recovery at Shinjuku hospital and that police have a lead on the whereabouts of the black sedan, the transient who was laughing earlier now dawns a scowl on his face at the good news and picks up a rusty pipe throwing it at the nearby wall "Dammit they didn't die!?" His friend replies "what do we do now?" The transient turns and looks back at his friend with a dead look in his eyes "i'll tell ya what we're gonna do we're gonna finish what we started!, and make sure they stay down for good!!" The other transient wonders if his friend is going too far this time but agrees out of fear of what his friend may do to him if he says no.

Back at Shinjuku hospital Balor opens the door to MC's room his large form almost bigger than the door itself "My. Beloved grandchild!" MC puts a finger over their mouth signaling Balor to be quiet" they tell Balor to keep his voice down in the hospital, Balor covers his mouth for a moment before removing his hand, Balor then moves over an plops down by their bed cris-crossing his massive hairy legs, Balor gently begins stroking MC's head with his large hand, he then nuzzles his face against MC's pulling them into an embrace, Balor's massive body practically engulfing them, MC returns the embrace Balor then begins to speak "oh my beloved sweet grandchild I was so worried about you" Balor slowly barrages the top of MC's head with gentle kisses, MC asks Balor if he saw the news footage too, Balor nods his head "seeing you get hurt like that made my heart ache like nothing i've ever felt before" Balor is now what MC calls grandpa bear mode where he becomes way more protective of them and will pound anyone dumb enough to try and take his precious grand-cub away from him, MC remembers that Balor was like this during an app battle a few months back when someone cut their shoulder, Balor used his eye of death and the outcome wasn't pretty for the other guys anyway, MC notices that Balor is wearing hardly anything accept a pair of green camouflage briefs and ankle high combat boots, Balor explains that love can make people do crazy things, MC chuckles then tells Balor to lean in close where they proceed to kiss him on the cheek before saying "thanks for worrying about me, I love you grandpa" Balor returns the sentiment and places a kiss on MC's cheek "I love you too my little dragon" Balor wraps his grandchild in his massive arms and gently rocks back and forth MC enjoying this show of parental affection.

a few minutes later MC hears the door open behind Balor MC quickly peeks around his large form to see Horkeu Kamui "My beloved one-huff huff I am huff here now!" Horkeu then drops to his hands and knees as he had been running nonstop from Ikebukuro, MC tells asks if he would like to sit down, Horkeu then complies and takes a seat still breathing heavily, MC asks why Horkeu is here and not still training in the mountains, Horkeu begins to explain that he had finished his training for now but got word from Nomad that you had been terribly injured in an accident, Horkeu then puts both hands on his knees and bows his head "please my love, forgive this kamui for failing to be your shield!" Horkeu says this with tears in his eyes, MC wraps their arm around his thick neck and passionately kisses him, "my love?" MC tells Horkeu that they forgive him and that they always will, upon hearing these words Horkeu cups MC's face gently in his hands and continues their passionate kiss, Balor interrupts the moment by asking "so I can expect my great grandbaby sometime soon I hope?" Both of them look up at Balor with faces red as tomatoes, Balor laughs at your reactions "Gahaha! Can't fault an old man for asking, after all i'm not gettin any younger!" Horkeu turns away from the two as to hide his embarrassment but then a smile spreads across his face at the thought of him and MC together with little wolf pups in both his arms, he says to himself maybe being a father wouldn't be so bad.

After another few minutes MC hears a knock on the door, it opens to reveal Tajikarao and Oguchi Magami standing behind them two more figures senior officer Hogen and chief of police Daikoku, MC asks what they're doing here Tajikarao pulls up a seat, Hogen then asks if Balor and Horkeu could wait in the hall they both reluctantly comply, Hogen then shuts the door and stands guard, Tajikarao then asks MC if they have ever seen these two before, MC looks at the photos of two red and blue lizard transients, MC says they haven't Tajikarao says that these two are more than likely the ones who ran you down the other day, MC's eyes widen in surprise, Tajikarao explaines that the Kabukicho guild used their connections to help find out where they had been hiding, he then went on to say the police force found the black sedan in an abandoned warehouse in Kabukicho yesterday with a dent on the left fender and hood where you were struck, Magami then interjects and says that the criminals are still at large but says not to worry and that they will bring these criminals to justice, Hogen then says until these criminals are caught there will be guards assigned to keep watch over you until these two are in custody, MC jokingly says to Hogen "wow you sure know how to make someone feel special" the four officers smile and chuckle glad to see that their beloved MC still has a sense of humor to joke in a serious situation such as this.

Out in the hall Balor and Horkeu sit silently, both listening in on the conversation Balor and Horkeu's hands begin to ball into fists as they learn that two lizard transients purposely tried to kill MC, Balor says if he ever sees them he's going to beat them within an inch of their pathetic lives, Horkeu says he feels the same, both then agree to help guard MC.

[prctty-birdie]

Happy Halloween!🎃✨

May you meet Death today?

Made for the one and only @toguchindraws , hope you like it!

(got a bit carried while writing and finished doing three whole different versions about your prompt; also got a bit too long, I guess? Sorry for any mistakes; I tried my best to make sure everything is right and make sense, since it`s been a while I`ve wrote something other than essays in english.)

Part of the 2022 Hellcheer Gift Exchange, hosted by @helloween-gift-exchange

Tags: Scared mortal, Otherworldly chauffeur, No Vecna, The Mummy(1991) elements used, AU where death have diferent servants to take souls into the afterlifes, Egyptian Mythology, Eddie is Anubis, Chrissy can see the other side, sheningans ensue, Mentioned Abusive family, Chrissy make a new crazy AND powerful friend, Jason is going to places.

“When darkness falls across the land, the world turns upside down, in a mysterious lullaby;where death, his angels and other devils are all wandering out here  just waiting for lost souls.....”

Christine "Chrissy" Cunningham or as her boyfriend Jason calls, "Chris" always has some kind of "other side" problems. She could see when a kind of shadow with no actual form, started following people and when this happened; a few days or even a month later (just once, the most long and successful witnessed by her) the said person would die.

She started seeing them after her grandfather, by mom's side, passed away.

At just the age of eight years old, remembers vividly how in peace he looked, when he closed his eyes and the shadow came out by the wall on the side of his bed at the hospital; just stretched his hand in the direction of his body and a second later with a blink, disappeared and the machinery started beeping.

The following days passed like a blur, she remembers telling her mother about this and she didn't care; probably thinking this was just her daughter`s imagination and when her grandpa's funeral happened she saw more of these shadows gluing themselves into the adults steps. Gradually, she started seeing them more often to a point where predicting bad things happening around became easy as breathing.

When turned fifteen, she noticed there were some kind of dogs or wolves as they seemed to look, with various sizes just as big as cars and little as sheeps, with dark red glowing eyes. They could see her staring and usually would just sniff at the direction she was walking by , but never exactly bothered to come close or chase….

1986

Well, this was her year of graduation and everything was running smoothly - thank you very much - except today, for three single-headed and weird facts:

Waking up to a crow screeching in her window, he had red scarlet eyes and let out a scream before flying to somewhere;

Missing the bus to school;

Suddenly and without a thought accepting a ride from this dude who could be a psycho killer by the looks and his expensive car (a damn Chevy Bel Air 1955 Black and Chrome, that she only knew because of mr. Richard Harrington; who lives ten blocks away driving one around when he's on town)

Well, maybe this was supposed to be her bad day; the Universe surely loves her to make this happen! anyway, she trailed off in thought until hearing the dude at the driver wheel (to whom she didn't trade a single word with since entered the car, could swear was some kind of vampire by the pale-white skin tone and didn't even introduced herself) started speaking in this low and bewitching voice.

- Miss Christine Cunningham, what a beautiful day; don`t you agree?- his voice sounded kinda emotionless while eyeing her with a knowing smirk- guess I wasn't supposed to be here to take you. - Chrissy`s head started ringing a bell at this sentence and she almost broke her neck, turning her head too fast to look at him entirely - But my curiosity just took the best of me, I guess…

At this moment he stopped in front of the school and looking through the window, there was no living soul walking around with also a weird mist, blocking some spaces of the outside view. Which was surely weird because she saw the bus passing by and right that her house is the last stop, before the bus goes directly to school and the mist was just weird; surely there weren't any drop in temperature and the sun was shining very bright today when leaving home.

Okayyyyyy…. 

Maybe this was her year of death and not the perfect-graduation-before-marrying-her-high school-sweetheart, but at least was going to be happy very far from her abusive mother and ignorant/absent father kind of freedom. Except for the fact she traced her brother's fate and will let him suffer the same twisted shit as her. It's too late to regret now, she can only pray that some other biggest force helps him.

The man started laughing (this cute half sweet and funny, kind of) and she may have or may not hold her breath; while lost in thoughts waiting for him to recompose himself after getting out of her own head.

- I'm sorry - he says with a shining and charming smile,before turning to look at her (maybe she went crazy today, but his eyes were a red scarlet like the dogs but with a gleam of knowledge like the crow at her window this morning, at least for a second seemed). With a blink his eyes were this chocolate brown, but the gleam stood there, he seemed to devour every detail of her avidly. He just offered his hand to her and when she went for a handshake, he took her hand making the way to his lips and leaving a little kiss at the back - I`m sorry - he seems to say this word way too much - my lady; but how impolite of me, to not present myself correctly to such a sweet woman as you! - he still held her hand, but the compliments and too formal way of speaking made her heart beat faster, with a little bit of red showing on her cheeks.

 - I am Anubis, guardian of the underworld and one of death's angels…

 - WHAT?!?- Chrissy just bursts out, before containing herself and now scared with all her being. While the supernatural being in front of her just seems to enjoy her reaction and waits patiently for her to calm down.

- Exactly what you heard, my lady; - she still can't believe this dude looking like a rockstar, seemingly to just have got out of one of those magazines such as Rolling Stone is THE egyptian God of underworld and afterlife. Well, it's just like this old saying: “Never doubt a bad event, cause things tend to get way worse; faster than a blink of an eye”. Maybe she's just hallucinating the whole thing? She pinch her leg and yep, this hurts and she's surely awake.

 - Okay, so…. What exactly do you want from me? I mean, I`m just a mortal as you can see and I don't exactly have anything to offer out of the ordinary. - he raises his hand as a signal for her to stop speaking.

- Lady Cunningham, I know you; I've heard enough from the shadows, so many stories of you to just make me curious enough to plan, want to come out of my house and meet you personally. My subordinates are amazed by the fact you can see them and always wanted to come closer and speak with you; but that`s explicitly against our most ancient and important rules. I deeply apologize on behalf of them, if they ever scared you or even chased you around; they just didn't know what to do or how to react to you seeing them, unlike all the other people.- he never let go of her hand while speaking and seemed disappointed after speaking about this essentially -  But, even breaking the rules death gave us and all,  I'm here to also make an offer….. - he looks directly to her like there`s nothing except her soul and could read her deepest secrets without even thinking too much.

She is still scared, not only because he's an egyptian god but because the world out of this space seems to have stopped the clock of time and is very empty. 

- Eternity is something so boring, especially if you can't be seen by other people; so, what I want to offer you is very simple: you can spend some time and keep me company, when you're free from your obligations and in return I can give you rides to anywhere, at anytime - and there it was, the glint but this time; seems like some kind of trap or especially making a deal with the devil himself in exchange for her soul. - So, what do you say?

Well, this wasn't exactly what she had in mind when he offered a ride to school (more like a murder, to be more exactly). But at least he seems to be good even being a powerful god and seems lonely. Well at least she wasn`t trading her soul for some crap and maybe even win a true friend (who knows?);

- Deal. So I can pet the dogs,crows or whatever they are now and they will not try to kill me? - He tried to mask his laugh with a cough and it didn't work.

- By Ra`s sunglasses! PLEASE, tell me you didn't try to pet any of them? - he teased softly and humorously.

- Yeah, I did when I was nine, but it was JUST once!- Chrissy tried to hide her blushed cheeks and failed- So, you have a deal and I want to know, how will you contact me? and if we're gonna hang out, we`ll need a new name for you. Anubis is weird for literally anyone, except if it's a dog- he seems concentrated and trying to find an answer to both questions. Then he seems to remember something, searches his pockets, until he finds a ring inside his jacket and asks for her hand again with a gesture.

-Have you ever heard the story of a place called Hamunaptra?-she shakes her head in a silent “no” - It's an ancient city; now it's buried and forgotten in the Sahara sands; used to be my domain and was called the City of the Dead, used to be the house to my bracelet; An antique necropolis which was the final rest to pharaohs and their families. - he puts a golden ring with the format of a scorpion, with a jackal head with his sting ready to attack, in her middle finger - this is a little copy of my bracelet, with it you can summon me or go to any place where I am. - he gives her a little proud smile, while she just admires the ring and traces its form with the fingertips; before putting her own hand in chest and enjoying this warm feeling of matter to someone. But she fastly snaps out of her short trance to ask:

- What about your name?  we`re still stuck here. - sounding a bit impatient and worried, he just shakes his hand dismissing her worries. 

- Well, that's the easiest part; you can choose any name you want and it's fine with me. - she then remembers why she thought he looked a bit familiar, he seems almost identical to this man….but what was his name? Oh, yes! Eddie Van Halen. She snaps her fingers after remembering this. He stares at her like she's plotting some miraculous plan and waits for her to say something.

- Okay, so you`re gonna be Eddie. An old friend who lives in Chicago and is moving to Hawkins? - she looks at him to confirm and he nods a short “yes”.

- Sooo….- she tries to think of something else, like a thank you. But remain silent and just discard this thought. - See you tomorrow afternoon after cheer practice? - she smiles happy and he does the same.

- Yes,surely my lady! - he answers kinda excited - Oh! and I almost forget, just touch the sting of the ring three times and I will come as fast as I can to where you are. - he says, shaking his head a bit. He then snapped his fingers and smiled like a little kid, who just did something without the parents knowledge. - Now, you`re ready to go to your class and back to everyone, before they just panic.

With this, just as the world was waiting for a command to come back to normal. The sun shines once again softly against her face and all the mist slowly dissolves herself into thin air. She just lets out a heavy sigh of relief and opens the door, gets out and closes. Before going into the school building, she turns one last time and sees Anubis, or better, as he would be called now ; “Eddie” with the passenger window now open, sending a short goodbye with his hand. After she does the same, he yells:

- Say goodbye to Jason for me! - he uses his hand as a megaphone -  because he's literally not going to live enough to see tomorrow comin` - and as fast as he can; he just rolls up the window again, turns to the exit of the parking lot and goes away. While Chrissy is just standing there, in shock, not having processed the last sentence he just dropped on her; while watching the black Bel Air getting smaller in the distance and slowly thinking:

[As weird as this can be, I think we're gonna be great friends and well… I can deal with this shit after all]

Little did she know, after all;

they become much more than just friends….

Allies, Lovers - Soulmates.

[whump-town]

would you be willing to write something inspired by the song "All For You" by Night Riots? no worries if not, I just think you'd be great at emotionally hurting us using the song

I love the Night Riots and it took me a hot second to figure out what I thought this song was about? My original idea was malicious and I decided against it and went with Hotch and Jack instead but that's not to say this is... better. I think the original meaning is more romantic but it's never struck me as a romantic song so I didn't write it that way (but I'd write it that way if you'd like)

The divorce happened long before Jack could remember. His first memories are of his parents apart. His mother liked the park. Climbing up on the slides and pushing him too high on the swings. She was adventurous and thriving, every moment he spent with her was packed with a new plan. A new trip. His father didn’t enjoy the loud screams of the other children, got nervous around the parents. He preferred the museum. Jack can remember sitting on his shoulders, his father’s trembling hand outstretched in front of them as he explained a painting or an artifact. There is a single memory that he has of them together.

There’s a bruise across his father’s eye, bleeding down into his lip. The colors are distorted, yellow and purple. A rainbow across his pale skin. Jack touches it curiously, tries to rub it off with his thumb but his mother pulls him away. She redirects him to the playground and promises they’ll follow after in a moment, go play. He remembers looking back at them, shouting for them at the top of the slide. He’d been so overjoyed at the sight of them together he hadn’t cared why. They’d waved back and he went on. He looked back at them several times. His father so small tucked against his mother’s side, her fingers soothing back his cowlicks back the same gentle way she does with Jack’s hair.

After she died, he spent a lot of time with other people. Over the course of the seventy-nine days following the death of his mother, he saw his father once, at the funeral. He had just come out of the bathroom, Jessica caving to his light tantrum and letting him go by himself. He walked straight into Emily.

“Oh,” she said softly. With a rustle of her dress, she knelt down beside him. “I was wondering where it was you were hiding,” she whispered. She had been the last familiar face he saw before they went into Witsec. She sat outside his father’s hospital room and talked to him, tried to be louder than his parents only a few feet away. It was her that assured him his father looked rather poorly but was okay, she would take care of him. She and Uncle Dave would make sure he would be okay. She’d been waving when he looked back over his shoulder at the hospital, he’d watched her disappear from the car window.

Jack hadn’t seen his father since. Has no memory of being pulled out of the box or talking to him on the phone minutes before that fateful shot.

Jack squirms, discomfort twisting his stomach in a way he doesn’t know how to explain. He knows he’ll be in trouble if he’s caught talking to her. Grandpa won’t be happy. “Do you know where Aunt Jess is?” he asks instead, looking around Emily to try and find her.

Emily shakes her head, “no sweetheart, I don’t. Why don’t we try to find her?”

Emily led him around the hall by the hand and that’s when Jack sees him. All he can see is his back but Jack knows it’s him. He wants to run over, to shout his name, and be pulled into one of his crushing hugs but he stays grappled to Emily. As if sensing him close, Hotch turns. They look at each other for a long moment, neither moving nor calling for the other.

He tells Jessica later as she’s tucking him into bed.

“Why didn’t you say hi, honey? That would have made his day.”

Jack hides his face in his pillow, shakes his head. No, it wouldn’t have.

They passed him around. He spent nine days with his grandparents and he learned quickly not to ask for his mother or father. Neither would be coming to get him. He played in the backyard and talked to them, shadows of them that he imagined there. His father laying on a picnic blanket, reading some old dusty book that smells weird, and his mother encouraging him to kick the ball back. With the sun on his back, he could nearly imagine them here. How it would feel to have his mother kiss his face again, to be held tightly to her chest until he begs to be put back down. To lay down beside his father, his head on his chest, and listening to the rumble of his voice through the rattling of his ribs.

He spends thirteen consecutive days with Jessica. She promised him his father was coming. “Give him time, sweetheart. He’s coming.”

Nearly a month. Jack stops hoping. He stops dreaming about those sunny days in the yard. Long days at the park and the way the world shifts when he’s atop his father’s shoulders looking down. Twenty-six days and his father shows up with a knock at the door. He was left with the neighbor, his grandparents, and Jess both having to leave. They come home in a fury, no one speaks to him as his clothes are packed. His toys were thrown in a suitcase.

His father looks so different. Tall and willowy, his limbs hanging down in a somber haunted curtain. His hands were in bandages, shaking at his sides. The same suit he wore to court that day hanging off of him. Jack hadn’t run immediately to him. He looked to his grandparents, huddled by the stairs and angry. To Jessica with tears in her eyes. He wasn’t sure if he was allowed to go or even if he should.

“Jack?” his father simply knelt to the floor. Forced his body into something smaller, sinking to the same height as his son. He looked more like a tired beast falling to the ground, a great huffing dying thing giving up its fight. “I missed you, buddy.” His voice cracks, his lip trembles but he doesn’t cry. “Do you--” he has to clear his throat. Has to wipe his eyes. “If you’d like we can go to my house now.”

Jack looks to his grandparents again, he doesn’t understand what’s happening.

Hotch smiles, tears seeping down his face, “you don’t have to come with me.” He tries to sound encouraging, to make it sound like he’s okay with whatever Jack chooses. If he’d rather stay with his grandparents that’s okay but it won’t be. Hotch can’t go home to that empty apartment again. He can’t keep living with his son torn away. “You can stay here, Jack.”

Jack shakes his head, anxiously he brings his fingers to his mouth. He looks to his grandparents again, to Jess expecting someone to tell him what to do. “You want me to?” he asks softly. “To go with you?”

Hotch chokes on a sob, nods his head when he can’t trust himself to say yes.

Jack runs to him, collides right into his chest, and pushes his face into his father’s shirt. Clings to him.

Hotch cups Jack’s head closer, sobbing no matter how badly he wishes he could maintain his control. He hasn’t seen his son in months. He’d felt the rejection and the fear in his eyes when they saw each other at the funeral, how clear it was that Jack wasn’t even sure that Hotch loved him.

Foyet had taken Jack but Hotch had pushed him away and then he nearly lost him. Haley’s parents wanted him, proper retribution for killing their daughter and he had nearly nothing to hold himself upright with. No rights to claim Jack. Could he name Jack’s favorite cartoon? Did he know Jack’s favorite color? Hotch hadn’t seen him in so long. He knew that Jack only ate the banana snacks when he was a baby. He slept with a nightlight of a firetruck and a stuffed bear named Nemo, who was sometimes also called other names depending on Jack’s mood. That at four his favorite color was yellow because that’s what Haley’s favorite color was. That Jack didn’t watch cartoons because he only ever wanted to watch Finding Nemo and Brother Bear. So no, no he didn’t know any of those things. Not anymore. He chose to keep his son alive over keeping him nearby, close enough to learn those things.

He thought the courts would rule with Haley’s parents.

He’s in no mental place to be raising a son on his own. His apartment is a mass of boxes as Roy had coldly pointed out, they’d been separated for nearly two years and he still hadn’t unpacked. He didn’t deserve it but he won.

“I thought--” Jack hiccups into his shoulder, fingers clenching Hotch’s jacket as tight as he can. “I thought you didn’t love me anymore.”

Hotch shakes his head, tries to pull Jack closer. Tighter. “No,” he promises, hoarsely. “No, buddy, I’d never stop loving you.”

[shingia]

Hello!!! I love ur fics sm 😭💖 This is weirdly specific and been plaguing my mind for days,,, Can I req an angsty fic where Atsumu broke up with the reader because he wants to chase his dreams and ultimately leaves but with the reader saying "I'll wait" . A few months later he seeks for the reader again and finds out the reader has terminal illness and is dying. You can decide if there's major character death or a miracle,,,, please and thank u so much!!

𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐨𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐨 - 𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

aw thank youuuu <33 and also WOW this request is in-tense, i modified the ‘terminal illness’ part a little bit for plot convenience, but i rly hope you’re gonna like it ! i am : stressed. also, i’m a sucker for happy endings (just ignore my last bokuto fic) so i couldn’t go full angst on that one 😅

quick storytime : my great grandpa died from heartbreak and i always thought it was a beautiful (yet very sad) way to die, so i guess that’s where i got my inspiration from <3

⤷  atsumu x gn!reader | angst | word count : 1.7K

warnings : hospital environment, heart condition, mild description of ‘illness’ and mentions of death (a little)

your first kiss with miya atsumu had been sloppy, dizzy, with a strong scent of rum and smudged lip balm all over your lips. but there was no doubt that it had been the best kiss of your entire lives…

…just like your last had been the worst. 

two months later, atsumu still couldn’t forget the salty taste of your lips that begged him not to leave. if he focused hard enough, he could even remember the feeling of your hands desperately clinging to his jacket in a last attempt at making him stay by your side.

but he didn’t, and as much as he hated himself for putting an end - even temporary - to what had been the most beautiful chapter of his life, he had never regretted his decision ; and he knew exactly why. you had promised to wait for him, and in pure egoism, he knew and hoped that you would. because no matter the distance, he was still madly in love with you.

which is why he did not understand why osamu was so outraged when he told him that he was finally ready to come back to you. but the younger twin knew things that his brother didn’t - he had seen you let yourself waste away, like nothing else mattered without the one you loved.

but more than that, atsumu did not know about the secret his brother promised to keep. he did not know that, two weeks ago, osamu had found you unconscious in your living room with an alarmingly slow heartbeat. the poor boy had not understood everything the doctors had told him - but whatever a cardiogenic shock was, he knew that it would have carried you off if without his intervention.

however, you had been categorical : atsumu shouldn’t not know about this, under any pretext. you refused to be a burden to the pursuit of his dreams for which he had already sacrificed so much for. but now that atsumu was back, something about this promise didn’t sit right with his brother. and so he decided to tell him everything.

« …most doctors thought about a standard heart attack » he told him after explaining the situation, on the lookout for any impulsive reaction from his brother. « … but one of them talked about something else. you might want to sit down ».

but atsumu couldn’t care less about his brother’s advice. actually, he didn’t care about anything else than you right now. it was already taking a lot of effort for him to stand there listening to samu instead of being on his way to the hospital - but he stayed. for an obscure reason that he didn’t really understand, he stayed.

« did you know that people can die of heartbreak ? » osamu asked, more serious than he had ever been in his whole life. 

the blonde twin felt like the ground had suddenly swallowed him whole - although his brother was trying his best not to sound too accusating, it was more than obvious that whatever situation you were in was because of him. and only him.

« no they can’t » he tried to protest, not even believing in his own words. panic was beginning to win him over - and in a matter of seconds, he lost all his composure « WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU NOT MOVING ? LET’S GO ! » he shouted, already opening the front door. at that moment, one question burned his lips, but he knew he would never have the guts to ask it out loud. 

‘did i kill them ?’

——

the steady beeps of all the machines around you were the only thing disrupting the deafening silence of your hospital room. you were sick of spending your days alone. but you had no right to complain, osamu had offered to come and see you after work every day, but you had politely refused. well, politely was a big word… your body was so exhausted that you had trouble articulating simple phrases, and therefore exclusively communicated through nods or hand gestures.

your phone had been confiscated and the doctors kept you away from the news - or at least from the negative news, because they knew that your heart might give out at the tiniest emotional distress.

which is why you were so surprised to hear a knock on your door at about 3pm, outside of the nurses’ shift hours. knowing that you were too weak to talk, osamu let himself in, slowly closing the door behind him before coming closer to your bed.

« how are you doing ? » he asked, resting his hands on the other end of the bed. you shrugged, pointing at the IV and all the monitoring surrounding you. as long as these machines were there, it was hard to feel better than just ok. « listen, um… someone is here for you. the doctors said i could bring him in, but i wanted your authorization first…��» he started before clearing his throat. « atsumu is back. do you- are you ready to see him ? ».

ready was probably not an appropriated word. but after two months spent pretending that he was still laying next to you in bed every night, still texting you good morning every day, still sending you the dumbest memes at the most random times, it would have been a huge mistake to refuse osamu’s proposition.

and so he let him in. obviously, atsumu had orders from the doctors and his brother : don’t run, don’t move too fast, don’t speak too soon, don’t touch them without warning. but nobody had asked him not to cry. and how could his eyes stay dry when you looked so fragile and so vulnerable ?

osamu quietly left the room, leaving the two of you together not without apprehension. but if there was one thing he could trust his brother on, it was taking care of you. two months could not have gotten the better of four years of relationship.

but as much as he cared about you, atsumu had always been - and still was - pretty bad with words. and the first ones that left his mouth were a great example. « are you going to die ? » he asked in a shaky voice, brows knitted.

you would have given him an answer if you had one, but you didn’t. the doctors said that you had gone through the most painful part, but the risks of aggravations were still too important to let you go home. you were not 100% safe yet.

« i told you i’d wait » you spoke in a hoarse voice, the beep of your heart monitor getting a little bit faster.

the steps atsumu took towards you were slow, like he had been told, but just one glance at his eyes was enough to know that deep down, he was dying to feel your skin against his.

« i know you probably hate me right now. and for good reasons » he started as he sat on the chair next to your bed, still painfully avoiding any contact. « but there’s something i need to tell you, in case… in case… well, if something were to happen ».

his eyes lingered on your fingertips, blue and cold, and his whole body tensed at once. the thought that everything you were going through had been caused by his own selfishness was driving him crazy. but he had one last thing to keep himself grounded, and that thing was exactly what he was about to tell you.

« i love you. but i caused you so much trouble that i think there’s only one way to prove it… » he said, taking a deep breath before finally resting a timid hand on your arm. « i want to marry you. right now. i don’t fucking care if it’s not considered official, i just want you to know that leaving you was probably the biggest mistake i ever did. and that i’m not leaving ever again. so fuck it, let’s get married ! you almost died, life’s too short to plan a stupid ceremony ».

he stopped for a few seconds, panting from his teary monologue and paying attention to any beep or other sound that might indicate that he had made things worse for you. but it seemed like you were doing ok. how could you not be ? the love of your life had just proposed to you - sure, it wasn’t how you had imagined it, but wasn’t it even more beautiful like that ?

the tears that started rolling down your cheeks were undoubtedly tears of happiness and relief to know that, finally, your life was back to normal. atsumu was your normality, and for the first time in two months, you finally felt like you had a purpose. you had no idea if soulmates existed, but what you had with atsumu seemed more than close enough.

if someone had entered the room at that moment, it’d probably have taken them several minutes to understand what was going on. two young adults, crying yet smiling, one of them laying on a hospital bed looking like they had been through hell and back, and the other tearing off two pieces of his t-shirt and looking genuinely proud of himself -  nothing about this made sense.

« my apologies, it was the easiest way to make us rings » atsumu chuckled, eyes still blurry as grabbed your hand in his with infinite tenderness. slowly, he tied the piece of cloth around your ring finger, loosely enough so that the doctors would not consider it dangerous for your blood circulation.

« i’m keeping that until you’re getting out of here. by my side. » he affirmed, pointing at his own makeshift ring before looking right into your eyes, as serious as ever. « and i’m also keeping you. forever. consider this my wedding vows »

as much as he hated to phrase it like that, you could both die in peace now.

i spent so much time on medical sites to be as accurate as i could, i felt like meredith mf grey for a few hours

@toworuu @catwithangerissues

[itismarvelicious]

I had an amazing dream last night, which was some kind of Daredevil AU I suppose, it was about Wilson Fisk and Matt Murdock except they were father and son, and Fisk was more like Vincent D’Onofrio, with a beard and hair and not dressed in suits, and I think he was actually called Vincent Murdock lol

And Matt wasn’t blind but disabled à la Dr House, walking with a cane and a limp, caused by a car accident that killed his wife (while he was driving). A few months later he, his 3 y.o identical twin daughters called Léonie and Louane, and Grandpa Vincent moved to a very small lake cabin, which was just one small bedroom with a double bed for the girls, one very tiny living room/kitchen where Matt slept on the couch and one almost equally tiny sunroom that was also used as a dining room, also with a couch where Grandpa Murdock slept - and a small bathroom of course.

Matt was still in the dark after his wife’s death, which he felt responsible for, and his leg hurt him all the time so he was always in a bad mood, so Vincent was taking care of the girls all the time - taking them outside when Matt refused, bathing them, putting them to bed, while also keeping an eye on his son and trying to remotivate him (I remember a scene where Matt woke up in huge pain from his leg, sweating, and his father heard him and came in the living room to check on him. Then Matt said I’m fine, go back to bed, and eventually, after taking a pill, came back to bed himself - checking on the girls, he laid down on their double bed next to them and fell back asleep eventually).

Matt had quit his lawyer job (he was working at Nelson and Murdock) and had taken a remote consulting job for different companies, so he was working from the sunroom. The lake cabin where they lived was part of some kind of lake neighbourhood, a very communal, middle class neighbourhood, where children of the neighbourhood were always outside playing. Matt working during the day, that’s why Grandpa Vincent took the girls out himself to play with the other children, and Matt would join them in the evening, coffee in hand, watching but never engaging, just not really there.

Matt also has kind of the same background as in Daredevil: he grew up at the church orphanage after his father went to jail for being a dirty cop, when Matt was only 12 or something. Convinced that his father was innocent, Matt became a lawyer for that reason, with the goal of doing justice to his dad. Once he passed his bar exam, Matt plunged into his father’s case, even visiting him in jail regularly, going over and over every files and testimonies etc etc, only to realise that his father was, indeed, guilty of everything. He never went to see his father again after that - only picking him up when he was released, a few years before the twins’ birth, just to get things perfectly clear: Matt being Matt, he believes people can change, he believes in redemption, so he believes his father “deserves to start a new life. But I don’t want to be a part of it.” Because it took years for Matt to put his father behind, after spending all his youth being obsessed with him, being obsessed with thinking him innocent, the disappointment so big.

And so Vincent respected his wish - sometimes, though, randomly running into his son, his wife and granddaughters, Matt ignoring him, and the girls not knowing him, until a few years after that when Foggy, looking after the twins while Matt was at the hospital, called him to tell him about the accident, so Vincent rushed to see his son and offered his help, which Matt, being disabled and in pain and mourning, accepted. And so that’s what this dream was all about - a son and a father reconnecting after all these years, and I swear it was SO beautiful, there were many more details, I’m not good enough at describing, it doesn’t convey all the feelings I felt, I woke up so moved.

Also random: sister Maggie was his mom as well here, I just knew it but I don’t think my brain created a scene with her. Also I think Vincent was actually gay? Idk maybe he was dating a guy in between the post prison years and before Matt’s accident. I think there was a scene where he meets with this guy again at some point. But he never left his son and granddaughters ever again. They lived together forever. And this was the ending I wanted in my dream.

Also, Matt’s wife was called Annabelle, she was french/malagasy, hence the french names for the girls. And Matt eventually put them in a french preschool, because he wanted them to keep practice french, because their mom was the only person they used to speak french with, and he asked his dad to drop them and pick them up from school every day, even though it was quite far from their lake house, to which Grandpa Vince replied “Okay. At one condition. You have to come with us everyday too”, because he wanted Matt to start getting more involved in the girls’ lives, more present. And Matt agreed. But when Vincent and Matt came back every afternoon to pick up the girls, it’s their grandfather they were running to, shouting “grandpaaaa”, and jumping in his arms. (Which was sooo heartbreaking, but Matt was so indifferent at that point that he didn’t even react to that either, just thanking and saying goodbye to the teachers and walking away).

I just have no idea how I got so many details from one dream, I think I was in a half awake/half asleep state. Forgive me for that very random post.

[cbk1000]

So, I was chatting with a co-worker today, and she was telling some stories about her childhood, and in the course of this, she mentions that she was adopted. Ok, cool. She elaborates that she was actually raised by her grandparents. Ok, ok; with you. An aunt and uncle of mine are actually raising their grandchild (her dad, my cousin, is a bit of a deadbeat to say the least). I ask if she was close with her mom, and she says, “Oh, yeah, my whole life; we were raised together.” Lovely; did they tell you she was your sister or something? Yes, they told her that her birth mother was her sister; she got pregnant at sixteen and they decided she did not need to be responsible for a baby at that age. 

Ok, cool; cool. Not the first time I’ve heard this sort of story.

Then my co-worker is like, “I actually didn’t know the truth until I was 20 years old. And it’s quite the story.”

LISTENING.

So here’s what she tells me: her mom gets pregnant at 16. Grandma/adoptive mother helps her actual mom hide the pregnancy, lying to everyone, including her husband. She sends her away to a hospital for unwed mothers which is run by nuns, and again lies and tells everyone that she’s at a summer camp for three months as a counselor. My co-worker is born; but of course, her mom can’t come home with a baby. Grandma/adoptive mom goes to get her and brings her home, leaving my co-worker at the hospital to be cared for by nuns. A few weeks later, grandma/ adoptive mom is like, “Hey, got word that this child was abandoned by its mother at this hospital for unwed mothers; we should take her in.” Bam; co-worker is adopted by her grandparents, and raised completely oblivious to the fact that her older sister is actually her mother. (Side note: she related a funny story in which she went off with a boy when she was about 13 to a drive-in movie, and her ‘sister’ came and pulled her out of the car and tore this boy a new asshole about how he was too old to be running around with 13-year-old girls. Co-worker of course does the “YOU’RE NOT MY MOTHER!!!!” thing as people are yelling at them to shut up because they’re ruining the movie. ‘Sister’ gets nose to nose with her and goes, “If you only knew.” Of course this is odd, but not something a 13-year-old thinks about overly much.) 

Fast forward to 20: a cousin drops the “So when did they finally tell you that you’re adopted?” bombshell on her. She was never told that she’s adopted. She is freaking out. She said she was too scared to talk to her parents about it, so she asked an aunt if it was true that she was adopted. Aunt confirms it for her. Co-worker then asks, “Am I Cherie’s?” Aunt hesitates and says that she doesn’t have any proof, but, yes, she suspects that her older sister is really her mother.

Fast forward much farther. Grandpa/adoptive father is on his death bed. He has hours remaining in his life. He tells her he has to confess something to her, and that he feels terrible they kept it from her all these years. She is adopted; he’s so sorry they never told her.

She says, “Daddy, I know. I know I’m Cherie’s kid.”

There is a long pause. He says, “You’re Cherie’s??”

HE DID NOT KNOW. HE DID NOT KNOW THIS WAS HIS GRANDDAUGHTER AND NOT JUST HIS ADOPTIVE DAUGHTER. 

He says of his beloved wife, while he is living out his last few hours, “That damned conniving woman; I always wondered why you looked so much like Cherie.”

Naturally I am delighted. I say that her grandmother/adoptive mother sounds like she was quite the character. My co-worker says, “You have no idea.” 

Then she tells me that her grandmother/mother used to go to Tijuana all the time with some girlfriends. Border security was much more lax back then--and I stop her at this point. I say, “Are you about to tell me your grandma/adoptive mother was a smuggler?”

Yes, friends. That was what she was about to tell me.

This lady felt so bad for the people trying to cross the border for a better life that she would stack like eight people at a time in the trunk of her Cadillac, smuggle them across the border, and then help them find work. Every Christmas they got cards from all these people her husband did not know. He would stare at these Christmas cards in total confusion, asking who these people were and why they were sending Christmas cards. Co-worker’s grandma/adoptive mother would then be like, “Oh, you do too know them! Remember, they lived just down the street from us” and make up a whole bullshit backstory with such confidence that eventually he would say, “Oh, yeah; I guess I do remember them.”

Anyway, I want a movie about this lady and her totally clueless husband wandering around in the background while she smuggles people across the border and adopts their own grandchild. 

[slashingdisneypasta]

Horror / Six: The Musical AU (X Reader) || Headcanons

Explanation: So all the songs are being sun by different readers with different Henry’s (The Horror Villains of course) instead of one Henry. I think its pretty straight forward apart from that! I hope to make a second part to this where the readers actually meet up and complain about their times with their respective horror villains. This is fun XD Had the idea a couple months back and I posted it and one blog commented saying Six is their favourite musical, so this is basically for me and them haha XD 

Character Included: Michael Myers, Chucky / Charles Lee Ray (And Tiffany Valentine), Bubba Sawyer, Norman Bates, Mayor Buckman (And Harper Alexandre) and Jason Voorhees. 

Warnings: Murder of the readers (By respective Horror Villains and a non-explicit difficult birth in Bubba’s), birth / pregnancy, toxic / abusive relationships, sexual harrassment / maybe rape (All You Wanna Do- Buckmans), language, suggested mother / son grossness (Norman and Norma of course). 

I laugh in the face of those who would subdue my mad ideas. 

‘No Way’ (Reader as Catherine of Aragon): Michael Myers as Henry

My name's Catherine of Aragon Was married 24 years I'm a paragon of royalty, my loyalty is to the Vatican So if you try to dump me You won't try that again 

You were in a, of course, very unequal relationship with the shape of Haddonfield. He saw you one day, was completely taken by you, and decided to let you live. He would come by and use you however he liked, kill the people you loved when they got your attention over him, etc. Like any other Michael Myers x Reader.

And, years and years later (Because it’s not like Michael finds someone every day that he gives even a bit of a shit about like he does - did, - you) he comes upon a new person. Someone he, like he was you, is drawn to.

And he tries to drop you like a hot potato.

And this infuriates you. You are not about to let go! He has ruined your life! You have no friends, no family, no life, because of him! All you have, is (regrettably) him and you are going to be his for the rest of your life. That’s what he wanted, that’s what the bastard’s going to get.

(Many, many years with him has caused your courage against him to grow spectacularly. You can say nearly anything to him)

|- ‘You must agree that, baby, in all the time I been by your side

I've never lost control’

‘I've put up with your sh- like every single day’ -|

You give him one more chance- if he can tell you one thing that you have done to him to legitimately hurt him… then you’ll leave willingly.

…

But he has nothing. And he doesn’t care.

|- ‘You got me down on my knees

Please tell me what you think I've done wrong

Been humble, been loyal, I've tried to swallow my pride all along

If you can just explain a single thing

I've done to cause you pain, I'll go

No?’ -|

//

|- ‘You wanna replace me? Baby, there's

N-n-n-n-n-n-no way

You made me a wife, so I'll be queen 'til the end of my life’ -|

He ends up strangling you to death when you won’t shut up.

‘Don’t Lose Your Head’ (Reader as Anne Boleyn): Chucky / Charles Lee Ray as Henry (And Tiffany as Catherine of Aragon)

I'm that Boleyn girl and I'm up next See I broke England from the church Yeah, I'm that sexy Why did I lose my head? Well, my sleeves may be green but my lipstick's red 

Chucky and his filthy ass catches sight of you. Young, French and vivacious and he’s got heart eyes on the spot. He wants you, but he also doesn’t really want to lose Tiffany.

So... yeah, you end up living with them both for a while and its very awkward and a very hostile situation.

|- ‘Here we go

(You sent him kisses)

I didn't know I would move in with his misses

(What?)

Get a life

(You're living with his wife?)

Like, what was I meant to do?’ -|

You don’t like it. No one likes this. Chucky! Make up your mind!

|- ‘Three in the bed and the little one said

If you wanna be wed, make up your mind

Her or me, chum

Don't wanna be some

Girl in a threesome

Are you blind?’ -|

Tiffany is of course Catherine, and the fandom (The people of Britain for the sake of this AU) loves her (As we all know), so when you come along and insult her because Chucky is now your man (Supposedly.) and of course you two aren’t getting along with each other in the first place because of him … you get a bad name.

|- ‘Ooh, why hasn't it hit her?

He doesn't want to bang you

Somebody hang you

(Wow Anne, way to make the country hate you)

Mate, what was I meant to do?’ -|

When eventually Chucky is able to grow the balls to boot Tiffany out (My heart hurts writing this, trust me), he pulls a ‘Once a cheater, always a cheater’ kind of shit and has no loyalty to you or respect for the sanctity of your relationship, and starts having one night stands here, there and everywhere. He tries vaguely to tell you you’re being silly and that’s not true- but he has lipstick on his shirt collars and perfume smell all over him.

Its not a nice living condition.

So you, still very much being the vivacious bitch that he ‘fell in love with’, go and flirt with some other guys. Just to make him a teensy bit jealous! I mean, its not like he’ll really care, right? You just wanna spark the fire again!

|- ‘Henry's out every night on the town

Just sleeping around, like what the hell?

If that's how it's gonna be

Maybe I'll flirt with a guy or three

Just to make him jell’ -|

But he finds out as planned… and is p i s s e d. He threatens that if you do that again, he’ll fucking kill you.

You, not going to let him talk to you like that, flirt with one more man. Just to be disobedient. 

|- ‘Henry finds out and he goes mental

He screams and shouts

Like so judgemental

You damn that witch

Mate, just shut up

I wouldn't be such a b-

If you could get it up’ -|

And you find out that he very much meant it when he said he would kill you.

|- ‘And now he's going 'round like off with her head (No)

(No)

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he means it’ -|

‘Heart of Stone’ (Reader as Jane Seymour): Bubba Sawyer as Henry

Jane Seymour the only one he truly loved (Rude) When my son was newly born, I died But I'm not what I seem or am I? Stick around and you'll suddenly see more 

You were an intended victim of the Sawyers, but like with Stretch, Bubba crushes on you instead. The difference here, is that you see the gentleness to him compared to his brothers, and how scared he is when one of them yells at him, and all the other little signs that he’s not as vicious or evil as his first impressions might convey. You have a big, brave heart, and you realise right there that its death and cannibalisation or understanding and caring for this man and you choose to love.

|- ‘You came my way, and I knew a storm could come too.’-|

//

|- ‘You've got a good heart

But I know it changes

A restless tide, untameable’ -|

So you take his hands in yours, all shaky and meaty as they are, and promise him that you will never leave him. You’ll protect him. You’ll take any mess he and his family can throw at you- you’ll always be with him. Your promise.

|- ‘But I took your hand, promised I'd withstand

Any blaze you blew my way

'Cause something inside, it solidified

And I knew I'd always stay’ -|

And he believes you, of course. Its so nice to be looked at so softly, especially by someone as pretty as you.

I- ‘You can build me up, you can tear me down

You can try but I'm unbreakable

You can do your best, but I'll stand the test

You'll find that I'm unshakeable

When the fire's burnt

When the wind has blown

When the water's dried, you'll still find stone

My heart of stone’ -|

And you prove yourself. You prove over and over again that no matter what he, or the twins, or Drayton, or even Grandpa throws at you- you’ll survive and you’ll stay, and you’ll never stop looking at him in that lovely soft way.

|- ‘You say we're perfect

A perfect family’ -|

You get pregnant of course because everyone in the Sawyers / Hewitts family has a breeding kink and you can’t tell me otherwise, and the birth is of course very difficult because Drayton isn’t about to pay for hospital bills. So you’re in their home, in all the mess and the dirt and with no sort of aesthetic, and…

|- ‘Soon I'll have to go

I'll never see him grow’  -|

You don’t make it. Your babies born fine and healthy, and you bring another strong Sawyer boy to the family, but you’re gone.

‘Get Down’ (Reader as Anne of Cleves): Norman Bates as Henry

Ich bin Anne of Cleves Ja! When he saw my portrait, he was like Ja! But I didn't look as good as good as I did in my pic Funny how we all discuss that but never Henry's little- 

So, one day, Norman decides its time to properly settle down (Long after his mother… ah… ‘dies’) and get a partner, and because there isn’t really anyone around where he lives to date or, even, who wouldn’t get creeped out by him and his taxidermy, he turns to online dating.

He meets you there. You own and run your own hotel in the next state over, you don’t mind his taxidermy at all, and your profile picture looks… hauntingly familiar (If you look nothing like Vera Farmiga go by the original movie- she was but a skeleton there so she really could be anyone).

|- ‘Sittin' here all alone

On a throne

In a palace that I happen to own

I'm not fake 'cause I've got acres and acres

Paid for with my own riches’ -|

And you two get along great over messages! You online date for a good year before Norman proposes you elope and come to live with him! You think you’ve known him long enough, and you trust him!

So you fly right over, and he meets you at the airport, and…

He’s disappointed.

Like, ‘sorry, nah, you don’t look enough like mama so this isn’t gonna work’. In a more fidgety, quiet, subdued kind of way though. He’s so awkward with communication that he even suggests that you doctored your profile picture.

I- ‘You, you said that I tricked ya

'Cause I, I didn't look like my profile picture’ -|

And, understandably, you’re p i s s e d, and disgusted! But ya’ll already got married over the internet, so theirs no stopping that! This is your husband. You realise you’ve made a huge mistake and go right back to your home and your hotel to get divorce papers drawn up.  

You’re the queen of your own fucking castle, who needs him?

|- ‘I'm the queen of the castle

Get down, you dirty rascal

'Cause I'm the queen of the castle’ -|

You are understandably, very very mad. And you say some things to Norman about he and his mother, that… may be true… but that he certainly doesn’t appreciate.

When you finally get the papers, and you’ve been separated long enough for it to be legal, you go back to the Bates Motel to get Norman to sign them and stay over a night. You’ve calmed down enough that you’re able to have a pleasant conversation with him, and you decide that you’re too tired to take the plane back home right away so you take up Normans offer to stay in one of vacant rooms (*Cough* So you basically have the run of the place. Or they do. *Cough).

Norman is also pretty calm about the whole thing as well, like you! But… Norma, is still seething.

You don’t wake up the next morning.  

‘All You Wanna Do’ (Reader as Kathrine Howard): Mayor Buckman as Henry (And Harper as Thomas)

Prick up your ears, I'm the Catherine who lost her head (Beheaded) For my promiscuity outside of wed Lock up your husbands Lock up your sons K. Howard is here and the fun's begun 

Right, so, you haven’t had good luck in love throughout your life, so you decide to give up on boys entirely. 

|- ‘So I decided to have a break from boys

And you'll never guess who I met’ -|

… And meet a man, not much later. A man in power; A mayor. A man who’s been married before and has a beard (So you know; He’s a man. XD No little boy.). This is of course Buckman. He calls you love, and you get a job in Pleasant Valley that keeps you comfortably busy. You feel like, finally, you’re where you belong. You feel fulfilled- no committed relationships are necessary.

|- ‘Globally revered

Although you wouldn't know it from the look of that beard

Made me a lady in waiting

Hurled me and my family up in the world

Gave me duties in court and he swears it's true

That without me, he doesn't know what he'd do

He cares so much, he calls me love’ -|

But then Buckman tells you that he cares about you. You have a connection. He doesn’t feel just ‘friendly’ feelings towards you- he wants more. And, though you are a little disappointed that your solitude didn’t last, you decide that he’s decent enough (’He is rather kind to me, and he does makes me smile a fair bit’, you try to reason with yourself that this is a good idea) and so you start to go out. Its not long before you’re married.

|- ‘So we got married Woo…’

Woo…’ -|

But being married to him isn’t easy. Not at all. You’re not use to politics; There are so many rules now, and he’s always too busy to help. And the rest for Pleasant Valley are a bit… odd. And you just don’t fit in. And this is wear Harper (Thomas) comes in.

|- ‘With Henry, it isn't easy

His temper's short, and his mates are sleazy

Except for this one courtier

He's a really nice guy, just so sincere

The royal life isn't what I planned

But Thomas is there to lend a helping hand

So sweet, makes sure that I'm okay

And we hang out loads when the King's away’ -|

And he’s so lovely and caring towards you (Never more then when Buckman leaves for business in other towns), helping you through the transition from your old life to this one. He’s a good friend, to you. And that is most definitely all he is, on your side of it. A friend. You don’t feel attractions towards him at all apart from that, and he doesn’t try to make any moves. Its wonderful!

|- ‘This guy, finally

Is what I want, the friend I need

Just mates, no chemistry

I get him and he gets me’ -|

… Until one day when Buckman has been away for a month, he tells you he cares about you. You have a connection. He doesn’t feel just ‘friendly’ feelings towards you- he wants more.

|- ‘He says we have a connection

I thought this time was different

Why did I think he'd be different?

But it's never, ever different’ -|

Lets just say one things leads to another, despite you at first turning him away and saying no. He’s so insistent, and a little scary, and you’re lonely because your husbands’ has been away so long, and… something happens that you regret and feel gross about.

|- ‘Squeeze me, don't care if you don't please me

Bite my lip and pull my hair

As you tell me, I'm the fairest of the fair

Playtime's over.’ -|

You tell Buckman when he gets home, and you watch as every bit of warmth and love in his eye disappears, just like that.

Its not long after that that his jealousy and betrayed rage takes over… and… you die with a rope around your neck and your feet swaying above the ground.

|- ‘Playtime’s over’ -|

(Alternatively, Sheriff Hoyt as Henry and Thomas as Thomas)

‘I Don’t Need Your Love’ (Reader as Catherine Parr): Jason Voorhees as Henry (Your last love was Jason when he was alive)

Five down, I'm the final wife I saw him to the end of his life I'm the survivor Catherine Parr I bet you wanna know how I got this far I said I bet you wanna know how we got this far Do you wanna know how we got this far then? 

So, you’re like the leader of the ‘Slashers Ex Squad’ because you, unlike the others, survived your time with Jason. This is because Jason did, truly, love you (To an extent- not enough to let you go and live your life without him or be free). None of the others really did. Not like he did.

|- ‘Became the one who survived’ -|

Your story:

You and Jason had an adorable little 11-year-old puppy love relationship when he was alive. You were his only friend, and he had it bad for you because of it. Pamela loved you, too.

When he died you were of course devastated, and years later when you were 30 (Making him also thirty- not that you know that. You still think he’s dead at this point) you’re taken by the need to go back to Camp Crystal Lake and pay your respects to your childhood love / friend. Its just one of those nostalgic days.

When you go, and you set flowers down by the lake, Jason catches sight of you. He thinks about killing you… but then your features start to make sense to him. He recognises you, and for the first time since his mother was killed, he feels his heartbeat speed up and swell with hope.

Jason of course kidnaps you then, and keeps you hostage for himself. He missed you. He doesn’t want to survive anymore time without you. You’re all he has left!

… After you realise that this is Jason Voorhees, you quickly learn that this Jason is, of course, not the boy that you cared, and care, so deeply about. He’s done horrible things, and he is never going to stop; And frankly, deep inside… he scares you.

But its not like you can leave him! He would never let you, he’s made that clear. You are all he has, and now, he is all that you have.

|- ‘I don't have a choice

If Henry says "it's you", then it's you

No matter how I feel

It's what I have to do’ -|

So you write a letter to the old Jason (And your old life), saying goodbye, in admittance to the fact that you’ll never be able to get away from this new Jason. This is you letting go of your freedom and any preconceptions that anything will every be the same- with Jason, or otherwise.

|- ‘It's true I'll never be over you 'Cause I have built a future in my mind with you And now the hope is gone There's nothing left for me to do’

'Cause I have built a future in my mind with you

And now the hope is gone

There's nothing left for me to do’ -|

You never stop hating him for how he’s changed (How he’s taken your Jason away, and wont even attempt to go back) and how he’s stolen away your freedom.

|- ‘I'd say "Henry, yeah it's true

I'll never belong to you

'Cause I am not your toy, to enjoy till there's something new

As if I'm gonna give up my boy, my work, my dreams

To care for you"

"Ha, darling, get a clue”

But I can't say that

Not to the king’ -|

You eventually die of natural causes at, like, 60.

[elisajdb]

Life With You: XXXIII

AN: Hi. I didn’t quit. Just had a very busy few months. I got sidelined into a project that took up a lot of my free time. It also caused me to have writer’s block but I got the story done. It’s another long one. Thank you for all the kind and supportive reviews. I’m sorry you had to wait so long.

 Part Thirty-Three: A New Life: Part Two

  “Krillin! Krillin, wake up!”

 The sharp pounding on his door woke Krillin from a blissful sleep. He was blinded in darkness. “What the hell?” Krillin murmured as he reached for the lamp and switched it on. “Ow!” he grimaced at the bright light.

 “Krillin!”

 “I’m up. I’m up.” Krillin pulled off the covers and swung his legs out of bed. Sluggishly, he walked to the door and stumbled over a shoe. He opened the door to see Master Roshi holding a cordless phone. “What is it?”

 “It’s Gohan. ChiChi’s in the hospital. She’s in labor.”

 “Labor?” Krillin rubbed his sleepy eyes. “Isn’t that soon?”

 The martial arts legend shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. Half Saiyan baby pregnancies may be different.” He handed Krillin a piece a paper. “Here’s the hospital Gohan and ChiChi are at. Better get there fast.”

 Krillin took the paper and closed the door. He murmured a curse when he tripped on that same shoe. Grabbing his pants off the floor, Krillin shuffled his legs in.  

 In bed, 18 propped herself on her elbow. “Goku’s wife is in labor?”

 “Yeah. I’m gonna find out what’s going on.”

 “Want me to come?”  

 Krillin hesitated for a moment before he slipped his shirt over his head. “Don’t think that will be smart. No one knows about us except Master Roshi and the timing’s not right.”

 “Whose fault is that?” 18 didn’t hide the irritation in her voice.

 Here we go again. “It’s not like we’ve had a reunion recently.” Krillin defended himself. “Everyone’s gone back to their lives.” 18’s face spoke volumes. She didn’t approve of what Krillin said and if he didn’t fix this, he wasn’t touching her for a while. “Lazuli,” he spoke her real name to let her know he’s serious. “I’m not ashamed of us. We’ll tell everyone about us when the time is right.”

 Krillin moved in to kiss 18 but she turned her face away. “Wasn’t it five years before you saw Goku after he married?”

 Krillin touched 18’s chin and kissed her. “It won’t be five years before we all meet. I promise.” He gave her another kiss. “I’ll call you when I’m at the hospital.”

 Bulma stepped off the elevator to the maternity ward of the hospital. She spotted Krillin with Gohan and Gyu-Mao and picked up her pace. Like Krillin, she was awakened with a call from Gohan. She left Trunks with her parents and flew here. It wasn’t WuKong Hospital where Goku recovered after his fight with Vegeta but the closest one near Mount Paouz. It was smaller and too far from West City for her liking.

 “Gohan. How’s ChiChi?”

 “I don’t know.” The child was very worried. As soon as ChiChi was taken to be examined, Gohan called Gyu-Mao, Master Roshi and Bulma. “The doctor is with her.”

 “What happened?”

 “Mom called for me. She was on the floor in pain, crying the baby’s coming.” Gohan wouldn’t say he triggered this. The last thing he wanted was his father’s friends accusing him. “I got here as fast as I could.”

 “You did the right thing,” Bulma told him. “But it might be one of those false contractions. I had a few. It wasn’t this early but I was so high on drugs when I was in labor I hardly felt anything. Maybe the stress of Goku’s death still lingered in her pregnancy but why didn’t ChiChi take better care of herself so this didn’t happen?”

 “ChiChi took excellent care of herself,” Gyu-Mao defended his daughter. “ChiChi would never do anything to harm her child. She loves her children more than her own life.”

 “She lost her husband,” Krillin joined in the defense. “That’s a lot of stress. Give her a break, Bulma.”

 “I know. I know.” It was an observation. She wasn’t insulting and didn’t understand they saw it that way. “But she is pregnant with Goku’s kid. That’s why I thought ChiChi would be cautious and not let herself go into labor early. It’s not all her fault,” Bulma lamented. “ChiChi wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for you, Krillin.”

 “Me?” Krillin pointed at himself. “How is this my fault?”

 “If you destroyed the remote, Goku wouldn’t have died and ChiChi wouldn’t have been so stressed about his death she put herself in the hospital.”

 Krillin balked at the insinuation. “You’re still blaming me?!”

Bulma crossed her arms as she stood her ground. “I don’t see anyone else to blame.”

 “How about that mass murderer you had a child with?!” Krillin fired back.

 “You’re blaming Vegeta?” Now Bulma was insulted.  

 “He let Cell reach perfect form. He fought his own son who tried to stop Cell. There never would’ve been a Cell Game if it wasn’t for Vegeta’s damn ego. If he and Trunks teamed up while Cell was imperfect, they would’ve killed Cell.”

 “It’s Vegeta!” Bulma yelled. “What else can you expect from a guy like him but you should’ve known better, Krillin! You’re the good guy or at least I thought you were when you weren’t thinking with your other head over someone not even a full human!”

 The remark about 18 stung. Secretly dating these months, Krillin got to know 18 very well. She didn’t share all of her past but what he knew, angered him, and if he weren’t determined to keep their relationship a secret, he would go in full-blown defense of her. Still, he couldn’t let Bulma get away with that strike against 18 without throwing up Bulma’s relationship with Vegeta. “So, because Vegeta isn’t ‘a good guy’ you excuse any dumbass thing he does? Gah!” Krillin threw his hands up. “You two are made for each other. Arrogant to the end but at least Vegeta eventually owns up to his mistakes!”

 Krillin talked back before but never like this. He never came at her so strongly. “You sure got a lot mouth on you. What’s going on with you?”

 “N-nothing,” Krillin stammered slightly, “but I’m tired of you constantly blaming me when we all know it was more than one person to blame for what happened at the Cell Game.”

 Gohan watched the bickering between his father’s friends in disbelief. Months later and they were still arguing whose fault this is. His father was dead and not coming back. His mother and baby brother were in danger and he blamed himself. He was haunted by the image of his mother crying in pain. Gohan called Grandpa and his Dad’s oldest friends hoping they will help. Grandpa did but all his father’s friends could do is argue with each other. They weren’t thinking of his family at all.

 Gohan felt rage boiling in him. Watching them argue was like watching his mother yell in the hospital over his decision to go to Namek. She kept screaming and didn’t want to listen or care how he felt about Piccolo. It was the same thing watching Bulma and Krillin argue with each other. They weren’t thinking about his mother or baby brother but only who to blame and Gohan was tired of it.

 “SHUT…. UP!!!” Gohan screamed. He was so loud Bulma and Krillin stopped arguing. Nurses looked up from their desk. People poked their heads out of their rooms to find the source of the yelling. “My mother and brother’s lives are in danger and all you two can think about is to find a person to blame! Blaming won’t bring my Dad back and it won’t help my Mom and brother! I wished I never called you!!”

 Not a sound passed as onlookers stared curiously at the two adults yelled at by a child. After the shock of Gohan yelling at them wore off, Bulma and Krillin’s faces turned red of embarrassment.

 It was Bulma who made the first move to apologize. “We’re frustrated, too, Gohan. This is our way of sorting it out.”

 “Find another way,” Gohan’s blunt tone stunned Bulma. He never spoke this way to her. He was always so well-mannered.

 Gyu-Mao stepped between the two and Gohan. “My grandson is right. This back and forth fighting does nothing. You fought at Goku’s memorial and you’re fighting now where his widow is in medical care to keep her and my grandson alive. Gohan called you because you’re Goku’s friends and thought you should know but if you can’t stop this petty fighting, then leave now before I throw you out.”

 Krillin took a step back and Bulma took a step back behind him.

 “Gohan!”

 Gohan turned to see Dr. Barkley rushing to him. He met her halfway. “My Mom….?”

 “Your Mom’s stabilized and we’re holding off as long as we can but your baby brother wants to come out. Your mother was three centimeters dilated when she came in. It’s five now and she’s going to be six centimeters soon.”

 Gohan understood some of that terminology. He read about it but not enough to fully understand. “But it’s too early. Mom should be nine months before she gives birth. If the baby’s born early then some things aren’t fully developed. Maybe it’s my brother’s lungs, his kidneys or his…..”

 “I understand your concerns,’ Dr. Barkley gently cut him off, “but you must remember you Mom’s not carrying a full-blooded human. You were born at nine months but you were more developed than any newborn I help birth. You acted like a two-month-old human baby at birth. If we take that into consideration, your brother may be born like a human newborn baby. Keep positive.”

 What she said made sense. That eased some of his worries. “I will.”

 “I’ve been through this once with your Mom. Your Dad’s not here but when she was in labor with you, Goku gave ChiChi some of his Ki. Can you do that?”

 “I can do that,” Gohan offered but doubt crept in him again, “but I don’t know how much.”

 Dr. Barkley secured an arm around Gohan as she walked them away. “You’ll know. Let’s go see your mother.”

 “Can we come?” Krillin asked.

 The smile on Dr. Barkley’s face fell at the expectant looks of Bulma and Krillin. She heard them arguing. “Sorry,” Dr. Barkley refused them. “ChiChi asked for Gohan and I saw your behavior. You’ll upset my patient.”

 Gohan looked at Gyu-Mao, thinking he will come. His grandpa declined. “Your Mom doesn’t know I’m here. Go talk to her. I’ll keep an eye on things here.” Gyu-Mao eyed Krillin and Bulma who both took another step back.

 When Gohan and Dr. Barkley left, Krillin sat in a chair farthest from Gyu-Mao. He couldn’t blame the doctor but Bulma was not happy at the refusal. “Who does she think she is? This isn’t West City but I can still make calls to the people on the board of this hospital.”

 Krillin sighed, “Bulma, just stop. With the way we were arguing, you can’t blame her for refusing us to see ChiChi.”

 Maybe he had a point but Bulma didn’t like it. She wasn’t one to be refused for anything and never so coldly. “I’ll let this pass,” Bulma accepted as she sat beside Krillin but there was one thing she wouldn’t let pass. “So….. who is she?”

 Krillin propped his elbow on the wooden chair arm. He rest his chin on his hand as he closed his eyes. It was almost two am and Krillin was tired. “Who?”

 “Who are you seeing?” Bulma asked. “You never talked to me that way before. You must be seeing someone to gain this confidence.” Krillin remained quiet but Bulma knew better. “You can pretend to sleep all you want but you know it’s true and I’ll keep talking until you tell me about her.”

 Krillin opened one eye. Bulma would keep pushing until she got the truth. She might even show up on Master Roshi’s island and meet 18 before he’s ready to introduce her to everyone. “I am seeing someone.” True. “It’s still new.” Lie.

 Bulma smirked. “I knew it. Is she cute? How did you meet her?”

 “She’s beautiful and I met her at work.”

 Bulma touched the short, black hair on Krillin’s head. It looked like a buzz cut. “And this has to be her influence, too. I didn’t know you could grow hair. I thought you were prematurely bald.”

 “I cut my hair because I was a fighter. One less way to be vulnerable.”

 “Was?” Bulma picked up the past tense.

 “I think it’s time I quit for good and settle down.” It was something Krillin thought about since Namek.  Spending time with 18 really settled it for him. “Goku’s sacrifice really makes ya think how short life is. I don’t wanna waste any more time.”

 “She’s that special and you won’t tell me about her? I’m insulted,” she dramatically feigned hurt. “I’m practically your big sister, Krillin.”

 Her guilt trip wasn’t working on him. “I don’t wanna jinx anything, Bulma.”

 “Fine,” Bulma huffed. “I won’t ask anymore but if it gets serious, I wanna meet her. Introduce her to all of us. I promise we’ll give her a better welcoming than we did ChiChi.”

 “Hope so.” Looking back, it was cringeworthy thinking how they all treated ChiChi when she married Goku. Bulma wanted to welcome 18 differently but Krillin knew when the day finally comes, it will be a disaster.

 “I’m surprised you work,” Bulma kept talking. “I thought you were on Master Roshi’s island doing nothing all these months.”

 “Not all of us are rich, Bulma. I did all types of odd jobs after the tournament before I worked regularly in security.”

 “You’re a rent a cop?” Bulma teased. “Why not do the real thing? You’d be the strongest cop on the force.”

 “I don’t feel that committed to law and order. Besides, I have more free time with this job.”

 Bulma smiled slyly. “And with that free time, you are seeing your girlfriend.” Bulma waited but Krillin didn’t answer. “You’re just like Yamcha. He won’t tell me about his girlfriend either.”

 “Well, exes usually don’t talk about who they are dating. Most exes don’t see each other. You and Yamcha are an anomaly.”

 “I guess you’re right.” Her and Yamcha’s situation was different but not uncommon. “It wasn’t always easy. Yamcha took our breakup hard and me being pregnant with Trunks even harder.”

 “Because he wanted a family with you and you didn’t with him but his mur---”

 “Point is,” Bulma cut him off, “Yamcha and I are in a better place now and are making it work. Just like me and Vegeta. We are proceeding with a relationship.”

 “He moved back in?” Krillin opened his eyes fully awake by this news. “You said he wasn’t living with you.”

 “Ancient history. He’s back. After being in a funk for a few months, Vegeta’s back to training, too.” An idea struck her. “After ChiChi has the baby, we all should get together. We shouldn’t let five years pass before we see each other. It’ll give us a chance to meet your girlfriend.”

 Oh, boy. Vegeta and 18 in the same room together. Krillin can see the mayhem.

 ****

 Gohan entered ChiChi’s room nervously. ChiChi wore a hospital gown, was hooked to machines and wore a strange belt over her belly. Each beep and chime increased his anxiety. ChiChi must’ve noticed his worry as she smiled and held her hand out to him. “I’m fine, Gohan.”

 Gohan didn’t believe that. He eyed one of the machines cautiously. “That is monitoring your Mom and brother’s heartbeats,” Dr. Barkley explained. “They’re good.”

 “If they were really good, Mom would be home and not here.” Gohan squeezed ChiChi’s hand. His hand illuminated as he transferred a little of his Ki to ChiChi. “I’ll make sure you have a healthy birth.”

 “Like your father,” ChiChi squeezed Gohan’s hand back. “Thank you but I might not need it. I don’t feel as drained as I did with you. When I have the baby, stay in the waiting room. You don’t need to see all of this.”

 “No,” Gohan refused. “I’m staying. Dad can’t be here so I will be in his place.”

 “Gohan, I know you’ve been through a lot, but you’re a child. You shouldn’t even be here now. Grandpa will be here with me.”

 “No!” Gohan would not be kicked out. “I survived living on my own for six months at four years old. I survived Namek when I was five. I saved the world from Cell months ago. I’m not too young for this!”

 Speechless, ChiChi looked at her doctor for help but she only shook her head. “Sorry, ChiChi. I agree with Gohan. We shouldn’t take any chances since this will not be a natural birth.”

 Outvoted, ChiChi shook her head slightly amused. “If it’s not Goku and you, it’s you and my doctor. I’m always outnumbered and have to give in, but I can’t with this. Gohan’s too young.”

 “It’s for your own good.” Dr. Barkley reached in the drawer by ChiChi’s bed. “Gohan, since you will be in here, there’s something you need to understand.”

 When ChiChi saw the wooden board in Dr. Barkley’s hands, her face turned bright pink. “Oh, no! Not that!”

 Gohan stared at the wooden chart. It was round with ten holes in different sizes. “What is that?”

 “This, Gohan, shows how your mother’s body is preparing for your baby brother to come out. You should be prepared if you have questions.”

 “Please put that away,” ChiChi requested. “Gohan’s too young for this.”

 “I am not,” Gohan protested. It was a chart with round holes in it. How can he be too young for that? “I know Mom has to push the baby out. I read that.” The books Gohan studied were very informative. This chart Dr. Barkley held was not something he read about. “But I never saw that in my books.”

 “Your mother is this size.” She pointed to the hole that’s five centimeters. Gohan’s eyes grew wide. His head didn’t turn but his eyes looked in his mother’s direction as he understood what Dr. Barkley meant. “When she is opened enough to be this size,” she pointed to the hole that’s ten centimeters, “she’ll be ready to push your brother out.”

 Gohan released his mother’s hand. He took the chart Dr. Barkley held out to him. He studied each hole. He pointed to the hole that’s ten centimeters. “I read the baby’s head comes out first.” This time Gohan looked at his mother alarmed. “You mean my brother….. I…..?! It stret……!”

 Dr. Barkley giggled. “He’s taking it better than Goku.”

 Though uncomfortable with Gohan learning all this, ChiChi couldn’t hold back her giggles as she thought of her late husband’s reaction. “Yes. Goku had a very different reaction.”

 “This should be the last checkup before your child is born. Any questions?”

 Goku had one. “Ya keep saying when ChiChi has the baby. How will ChiChi get the baby out?” He pointed to the monitor. “That baby looks big and ChiChi ain’t got any holes that big.”

 Dr. Barkley chuckled while ChiChi humorously rolled her eyes. “She will push the child out.”

 “Like poo?” Goku asked. “From her butt?” The idea horrified Goku. “Her butt hole’s gonna stretch that big?!!”

 Again the doctor laughed. “ChiChi will push the child out from where you entered to make the baby.”

 Dr. Barkley and ChiChi watched Goku’s eyes grow wide on his face to a horrific realization. “But ChiChi’s hole ain’t that big! It’s tight when I’m in there. How will the baby come out?”

 Dr. Barkley held up the dilation chart. “This is a dilation chart, Goku. When ChiChi’s in labor, her body will stretch in her vaginal area to prepare for the baby to come out. Over several hours, she will stretch from here,” she pointed to the circle that’s one centimeter, “to here.” She pointed to the circle that is ten centimeters. “When ChiChi’s at ten centimeters, her body is ready to push the child out.”

 Goku studied the different circle sizes on the chart. He looked at ChiChi and back at the chart. “It looks like it will hurt.”

 “Childbirth isn’t easy.” Dr. Barkley placed the chart back on the table. “It’s painful but the child is worth it.”

 Goku turned to ChiChi. “You didn’t say having a baby is painful, ChiChi. Why do this if it’s painful?”

 “It’s worth it, Goku. I promise you. Besides, you didn’t mind the pain in your fights.”

 “I guess you have a point.” Though Goku didn’t think it was the same. “But if ChiChi’s gonna get that big when she has a baby, what about after? I won’t be tight and warm in ChiChi anymore and I really like that feeling. It feels sooo good.”

 “Goku!” ChiChi blushed. “Don’t say that!”

 Goku didn’t see the issue in speaking to Dr. Barkley about their sex life. They’ve done it before. “We can talk about it with her, ChiChi. She’s seen you down there and told us we can still do it while you’re pregnant.”

 “Um,” Dr. Barkley cleared her throat. “Goku, ChiChi will return to normal down there but she has to heal after the baby’s born.”

 “Oh, yeah.” Thinking about the size ChiChi will stretch, that made sense. “I can get senzu beans for you, ChiChi. That’ll heal you up faster. We can have sex right after the baby’s born.”

 Now it was ChiChi’s eyes who expanded. “There’s no need for that. I’ll heal naturally.”

 That didn’t make sense to Goku but if that’s what ChiChi wanted. “How long will it take for you to heal?”

 “It’s usually two months,” Dr. Barkley answered.

 “WHAT?!” Goku screamed. “Two months?! But we ain’t done it in a month and ChiChi won’t let me put it behind her anymore until after the baby’s born.”

 “GOKU!” ChiChi screamed. Her face matched the colors of her red skirt. “Don’t talk about that with her!”

 The laughs of his Mom and Dr. Barkley left Gohan feeling he was left out of a joke or a fond memory of his father he wanted to be told about. “What happened? How did Dad react to it?”

 Dr. Barkley laughed even louder while ChiChi explained, “Your Dad was confused about the birthing process, Gohan, but he was there when it counted.”

 “You mean when he helped me be born?” Gohan heard about that. He was happy his Dad knew what to do and felt nervous to live up to that. After ChiChi gives birth, there will be two people he will be responsible for protecting. Not even a year since his father’s death and Gohan felt he failed to  protect his mother. A baby is even more vulnerable.

 How am I gonna do it? Can I really protect them both?

 “Where’s my Dad?” ChiChi asked unaware of Gohan’s troubles. “I know he’s out there.”

 “He’s in the waiting room with Krillin and Bulma.”

 “They’re here?” That surprised ChiChi.

 “I called them because I thought they should be here.” The earlier fighting still bothered him. “I made a mistake doing that.”

 “Why?”

 “They started arguing whose fault it is you’re like this and….” Gohan lowered his head. “We both know who that is.”

“Cell.” Dr. Barkley spoke as she placed the wooden chart back in the drawer. “Cell was the killer and nothing else matters. Maybe one of these days Goku’s friends will understand that.”

 They weren’t the only ones who needed to understand ChiChi thought as she noticed Gohan’s troubled expression.

 “Dr. Barkley, let Krillin, Bulma and my father know I’m well and they can visit but I need to talk to Gohan alone first.”

 “All right,” Dr. Barkley didn’t agree with ChiChi’s decision, “but if they argue again I will have security kick them out of the hospital. Remember what happened at Gohan’s birth with that old woman and her grandson,” she warned before leaving.

 ChiChi would never forget what happened but she wished Dr. Barkley didn’t say that in front of Gohan. She saw the curiosity forming on his face. With the way he has been with her lately, she knew Gohan will question it.

 “What happened when I was born, Mom?”

 Gohan knew of Mrs. Niver and Kaifun dislike for Goku. If he knew what happened the day of his birth… “Gohan, it was handled. I want to talk about why you feel my condition is your fault.”

 “Because it is.”

 “Because it’s not,” ChiChi corrected him. “You always listened to your Dad, Gohan. I knew whatever happened that day, you would be the one person to not do anything to cause his death and when you told me what you did…. it shocked me.”

 Months later and he still can’t believe what he did. He never thought his actions would lead his father to sacrifice himself. “I know. I never planned to tell you but it came out and I’m sorry. I know you hate me. I know you’re only tolerating me because you’re staying calm for the baby.”

 Gohan was a sweet child but he had his moods which led him to misconstrue facts, and in his own frustration, make false accusations. “You saw my grief more than anyone. I know you didn’t mean to do what you did but it happened and it hurt me.”

 Gohan knew that but he was frustrated, too. When he cried, his parents comforted him. When he needed comfort after his father’s sacrifice, his father’s voice calmed him. When he confessed to his mother his part in his father dying, Gohan expected his mother to comfort him. He didn’t like she pulled away as if rejecting him. “You kept moving away from me when I kept apologizing. I thought you hated me and wanted to kick me out.”

 If not for the gravity of the situation, ChiChi would smile. Her son had a lot of her ways, too, and when he’s emotional, he’s blinded. ChiChi patted a spot on her bed for Gohan to sit down. When he did, he leaned on ChiChi’s shoulder. “My reaction didn’t mean I hate you, Gohan. I could never hate you but I couldn’t comfort you either. You had months to wrestle with this decision. I only had moments to deal with it before you wanted me to forgive you. I’m always willing to sacrifice my needs and feelings for you and Goku but last night, I couldn’t. Call me selfish but I need time to process this.”

 Calmer with a clearer mind, Gohan felt guilty for his behavior. “You’re not selfish, Mom. I told you something I knew would hurt you but I couldn’t hold the guilt in anymore. I was selfish.” Gohan embraced ChiChi. “I’m sorry, Mom. I shouldn’t have begged you to forgive me. I should’ve given you time. I’m ready to do that.”

 ChiChi’s arms wrapped around Gohan. This was her kindhearted son. “Thank you, Gohan.”

 ****

 Gohan was by ChiChi’s side as she let out another scream. Gohan wiped her sweaty forehead. “You’re doing great, Mom.”

 It was after dawn when ChiChi was ready to deliver her second child.  Krillin and Bulma visited but left, promising to return when she gave birth. Gyu-Mao stayed but paced in the waiting room.

 “His head and shoulders are out. He has a lot of hair!” Dr. Barkley laughed. She glanced at ChiChi’s biometrics on a monitor. “Your body is handling this birth much better than Gohan’s.”

 This news excited Gohan. “He’s almost here, Mom.”

 “I need another push, ChiChi,” Dr. Barkley urged. “Give me a really big one.”

 “Oh….. okay.” ChiChi squeezed Gohan’s hand screaming while giving a strong push.

 “Good. Good!” Dr. Barkley cheered. “He’s out to his hips. Take a moment and get ready for one more push. He’s almost out.”

 “One more….” ChiChi panted. “One more….”

 “You can do it, Mom,” Gohan encouraged her. “Let’s make our family three again.”

 Three. That was a nice thought. If they couldn’t be a family of four, ChiChi happily settled for a family of three. ChiChi screamed one final, big push. It was sweet relief feeling the heavy load she carried for months leaving her body. It was even sweeter when that load announced itself to the world in a beautiful cry. ChiChi’s eyes moistened with tears. Her and Goku’s last child was finally here.

 Gohan eased ChiChi to rest against the pillows. The sweet sounds of her baby crying was joyful and until she noticed Dr. Barkley acting odd. When Gohan was born, Dr. Barkley held up Gohan for her and Goku to see. This time, Dr. Barkley held her baby in a way he was shielded from her view.  ChiChi felt something was dreadfully wrong.  “What is it?” ChiChi asked worriedly. “What’s wrong with my baby?”

 Dr. Barkley stared at the child and back to Gohan and ChiChi. “The baby’s fine, ChiChi. It’s just…… he….”

 “He what?” ChiChi demanded. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

 “We need to know,” Gohan, worried too, pleaded. Whatever it is, I will fix it.

 Dr. Barkley approached ChiChi. The child’s appearance became clear to mother and big brother as the doctor revealed the child. “It’s ….. the baby looks like Goku.”

 ChiChi and Gohan were awed in silence at the child’s similarity to Goku. Seeing the resemblance of his father in his brother filled Gohan with immense pleasure but an equal amount of guilt.  Dr. Barkley placed the baby on ChiChi’s stomach. She wiped the crying child clean before cutting the umbilical cord. She carried the baby to the other side of the room where she gave the child a thorough physical exam with her instruments and machines all under Gohan and ChiChi’s watchful eyes.  

 “He’s so beautiful,” ChiChi murmured with watery eyes.

 Dr. Barkley returned holding the baby wrapped in a blue blanket. “He’s a little different from Gohan,” she informed ChiChi as she placed the child in her arms.

 “How so?”

 “When Gohan was born, he could move his head at will. This child is like a human newborn baby. You have to hold his head. I guess,” Dr. Barkley explained, “it’s because he’s early but he’s still healthy as a newborn human. He responded to all the tests and everything is fully developed.”

 ChiChi murmured ‘okay’ as she gently held her newborn. The baby’s tired eyes stared at ChiChi as she placed a kiss on his forehead. “Hello…. Goten.”

 “Goten?” Gohan marveled at the name as he couldn’t stop grinning at the baby. “You didn’t tell me you had a name picked.”

 ChiChi nuzzled her face against Goten’s cheek tenderly. “There were two I was stuck on. When I learned I was having another boy, I wanted something close to Goku’s name. Goku’s in heaven protecting us but he’s still with us, and when I saw this sweet baby’s face, I knew. I have to name him Goten.”

 Gohan touched Goten’s soft and wet hair. The spikes in his hair were short but in a distinctive style. Just like Dad’s.

 “He’s not like you,” ChiChi softly chuckled at Goten closing his eyes.

 “What do you mean?”

 “When you were born, your eyes were wide open. You were constantly looking around. Goten is content to rest. He’s like Goku. He could sleep anywhere and not care what’s going on.” ChiChi shifted slightly. “Wanna hold him?”

 Slight trepidation rose in Gohan. He’s held babies before but they were much older. “I never held a newborn.”

 “You held Aki’s child.”

 “She wasn’t a newborn.”

 “He’s your brother,” ChiChi insisted. “You won’t hurt him.” ChiChi gently eased Goten in Gohan’s arms. “Careful with his head.” She adjusted Gohan’s arm slightly to elevate Goten’s head.

 The gentle exchange stirred Goten to open his eyes again. He gazed at Gohan in slight wonder. A lump formed in Gohan’s throat at the innocence of his baby brother staring at him. For a brief moment, he saw his father’s smiling face staring back.

 “Talk to him,” ChiChi encouraged Gohan. “Let him hear your voice.”

 “Hi, Goten. I’m your brother, Gohan. We’re gonna have a lot of fun together.” Gohan’s eyes mist as he thought of his father and what they did together. A strong need to protect and make sure Goten experience all the fun things he did with his father stirred in him. “I’m gonna take you fishing. I’m gonna take you camping and I will always protect you.”

 Holding Goten, Gohan felt all the pressure and stress he held since he brought his mother to the hospital lift. Now he knew mother and brother were all right, he could relax.

 Gohan’s stomach growled…. loudly.

 And eat.

 “Have you eaten?” ChiChi tiredly asked.

 “No,” Gohan admitted with a blush on his cheeks. “I’ve been too worried about you and Goten to eat. I don’t have any money either.”

 ChiChi gently took Goten from Gohan’s arms. “Grandpa does. Tell him about his grandson and go eat.”

 He didn’t need to be told twice. After being awake all night, waiting, worrying and helping with the birth of Goten, hunger and fatigue was settling in.  

 After telling Gyu-Mao about Goten and getting money for food, Gohan called Krillin and Bulma before going to the hospital’s food court. He was so hungry, he got food from every restaurant. When he left, his arms loaded with hot bags of food from all the food courts. While waiting for the elevator to open, Gohan heard his name called.

 “Gohan?”

 Gohan turned to see Kaifun and Mrs. Niver approaching. Why were they here?

 “I thought that was you,” Kaifun smiled but Gohan remained on guard. “What are you doing…..” Kaifun trailed off suddenly. “Is ChiChi okay?”

 “Mom gave birth.” Gohan answered curtly and asked, “Why are you here?”

 “Already?” Kaifun appeared concerned but after what Gohan learned about Kaifun’s history with his parents, Gohan didn’t trust him. “This is early. Are she and the baby okay?”

 “They’re fine,” Gohan was clipped again. “Why are you here?” he repeated.

 “Hmmph!” Mrs. Niver scoffed. “You’re being very rude. I thought without your father you would have better manners.”

 “My manners have nothing to do with my father.”

 “That’s true,” Mrs. Niver agreed. “What manners you did develop, you got from your mother. Your father never had any.”

 “Grandma,” Kaifun hushed Mrs. Niver. “Stop that.” Kaifun felt his face flush with embarrassment. Not even Goku’s death softened her feelings for him. “Grandma needs a procedure done, Gohan. She’s getting a pacemaker and she’s a bit grumpy. Forgive her.”

 The elevator doors opened. “I need to go. Goodbye.”

 Gohan stepped in the elevator and pressed the floor for maternity and much to Gohan’s displeasure, Kaifun and Mrs. Niver entered the elevator, too. “We should see ChiChi before we check you in, Grandma.”

 The two of them in the same room with his mother and brother? The thought turned Gohan’s stomach. “That’s not needed. You should check Mrs. Niver in now.”

 “We’re early,” Kaifun ruffled Gohan’s hair playfully. Gohan stepped out of Kaifun’s reach. Gohan’s subtle rejection went unnoticed as Kaifun bragged, “You don’t know this but we saw you the day you were born, Gohan. Kind of makes sense for us to be here to see ChiChi’s second child.”

 His mother’s second….. The lack of acknowledging his father wasn’t lost on Gohan. “It’s my father’s child, too.”

 This time Kaifun noticed something different about Gohan. Gohan was always so well-mannered around him. What changed? He hoped ChiChi didn’t tell Gohan what he and his grandmother have done to her and Goku in the past.

 “Hmm,” Mrs. Niver sucked her false teeth. “Last I saw you it was at your father’s wake. You didn’t have this attitude then. Is this a result of him being gone?”

 Remember what happened at Gohan’s birth with that old woman and her grandson.

 The bags of food nearly slipped out of his arms. Dr. Barkley referenced them. Kaifun and Mrs. Niver saw him at his birth and something happened. Something bad that upset his mother. If they thought they will upset his mother the day of his brother’s birth…….

 “I know you saw me the day I was born,” Gohan told them. “It wasn’t a happy occasion.” There! Gohan saw the change in demeanor…. from Kaifun. Mrs. Niver still wore the same grumpy face.

 “Oh….” Kaifun looked nervous. “You know.” Now he understood Gohan’s annoyance with him, Kaifun wanted to explain himself. “Grandma was wrong calling you deformed and she shouldn’t have said Goku is a mixed breed of a human and animal but she paid for that. I know it upset your Mom and the King but we moved past that.” The elevator opened. “Let’s see your Mom and send good wishes to her and her baby.”

 Kaifun had one foot out the elevator when Gohan grabbed his arm and pulled him back in. Kaifun tried to pull away but Gohan’s grip kept him in place. How was this child so strong? If he squeezed any tighter, his wrist might break. The anger in Gohan’s eyes concerned Kaifun. The last he saw that was years ago when he and Goku talked. ChiChi was pregnant with Gohan and Goku was very irritable and warned him to stay away from ChiChi.

 “Your grandmother called me deformed, insulted my father in front of my mother the day I was born. Do you think I’m going to let you two see my baby brother on the day of his birth?”

 “Gohan….” Kaifun pleaded. This child will break his arm. “Ah… you’re hurting me.”

 “You’re not going near my mother and brother!”

 “What’s the matter with you?” Kaifun crumpled to his knees under Gohan’s strength. The elevator closed. Mrs. Niver put her hand on Gohan and pulled. When her feeble strength couldn’t break Gohan’s hold, she smacked him with her purse. “Let go of my grandson!”

 During the struggle, the three didn’t notice the elevator going up until it opened. Two nurses stared at a man on his knees crying in pain under the strength of a child who was getting smacked by an old woman using her purse.

 Gohan immediately released Kaifun and Mrs. Niver stopped hitting him. Kaifun remained on his knees gripping his wrist. “Why did you do that?”

 The elevator began moving down under its own power. Gohan didn’t notice as he focused on Kaifun. “You want to see my mother and brother. I won’t let you.”

 The elevator opened on the maternity floor but no one pressed the button to that floor. All three were surprised to see Gyu-Mao on the other side.

 “Grandpa?”

 “Your Majesty,” Kaifun winced as he slowly stood.

 Gyu-Mao stared at all three confused. “What’s going on?”

 “Grandpa.” Gohan stepped off the elevator. “Why are you not with Mom and Goten?”

 “ChiChi had to feed Goten. I made some calls and I was going to join you in the food court.” Gyu-Mao noticed Kaifun and Mrs. Niver stepping off the elevator, too. “What are you two doing here?”

 “Grandma’s having a pacemaker put in. We saw Gohan and came up to see ChiChi and the baby.”

 “Only he tried to stop us!” Mrs. Niver pointed at Gohan. “He almost broke Kaifun’s wrist!”

 Gyu-Mao noticed Kaifun still rubbing his wrist. Gohan didn’t defend himself so Gyu-Mao surmised the accusations were true. “If Gohan did it, he must’ve had a reason. Gohan? Wanna tell Grandpa what happened?”

 The glare Gohan sent Kaifun and Mrs. Niver forced Kaifun to take a step back. “I know what happened the day I was born. I didn’t want them to see Mom and Goten.”

 Gyu-Mao was proud. The boy definitely had his father in him. “You’re protective. Just like your Pops. Don’t worry, Gohan. They can see them.” Gyu-Mao smiled at Kaifun and Mrs. Niver but his intense eyes signaled a silent threat to them. “They wouldn’t dare repeat what happen the day you were born. Come on,” Gyu-Mao led everyone to ChiChi’s room. “Let’s see ChiChi and my grandson.”

 Unaware of the drama, ChiChi enjoyed private time with Goten. “So, you’re here. A little early but you’re here.” Goten quietly nursed from ChiChi. “I should’ve expected that. Your Daddy wasn’t patient either when he really wanted something. I wish your Daddy can see you. He would’ve been eager to hold you.”

 ChiChi caressed a plumped cheek. “Daddy’s not here, Goten, but I’ll do my best to love you for both of us. Gohan and I will do things Daddy would do with you. We’ll take you fishing. We’ll take you camping. We’ll…..” she paused suddenly overwhelmed, “….. we’ll even train you. Well, maybe Gohan will train you. He’s probably the best person since he knows Daddy’s skills and I want you to be as strong as possible because it’s what your Daddy will want.” During her talk, Goten fell asleep again. ChiChi pulled him from her breast. “And when you see Daddy in heaven, you can tell him how strong you became.”

 ChiChi covered herself when she heard a light tap on her door. “ChiChi, are you still feeding?”

 “I’m done, Dad.”

 “I have some company.”

 “Krillin and Bulma are back?”

 “No, not them.” Gyu-Mao stepped in with Gohan close behind him. Lagging behind Gohan were Kaifun and Mrs. Niver.

 Color drained from ChiChi’s face. Her mind flashed to the day of Gohan’s birth. She remembered Mrs. Niver’s cold insult; the screaming from her father; baby Gohan crying. She instinctively pulled Goten closer.

 “I didn’t want them here,” Gohan announced as he placed his bags of food on a table, “but Grandpa said it’s okay.”

 “Mrs. Niver is having a pacemaker put in but she and Kaifun want to see the baby. I said it’s all right.” Gyu-Mao saw ChiChi’s worry. “I think they want to make up for what they did when Gohan was born.”

 “It’s true,” Kaifun put in. “We just want to see the baby, wish you well and be on our way.”

 ChiChi noticed the glare on Gohan’s face and the smile on her father’s. Two different responses but Gohan’s was most concerning. “All right,” she reluctantly gave in.

 Kaifun stepped forward. When he saw Goten’s face, color drained from his face. I don’t believe it. “He’s…..” Kaifun began slowly, “he’s beautiful. He looks so strong and healthy being early.” He looks just like Goku.

 Kaifun’s pale face brought a little satisfaction to ChiChi as she proudly declared, “Goten’s strong like his Daddy. He’s inherited a lot from him.”

 “Obviously,” Kaifun murmured.

 Mrs. Niver stepped forward curious herself. When she saw Goten’s face, the color drained from her face, too. “No…..” she murmured shaking her head. “No. His face……” Mrs. Niver stepped back. She looked as if she had seen a ghost. “It’s like……. it’s like…..” Sweat perspired on her face, the air in the room thickened and her heart thumped wildly in her chest.

 “Grandma? Are you all right?”

 The old woman clutched her chest as she stumbled backward out the door. “Air….. I need… air..”

 “Grandma!” Kaifun chased after the old woman. He found her leaning against the wall clutching her chest. “Grandma!” he worriedly clutched her shoulders. “Are you having a heart attack?”

“He’s come back from the grave.”

 Kaifun’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Who did?”

 “That….. waste of ….. sperm. Goku.” She was hyperventilating now. “I thought we were finally rid of him…..” She squeezed her hand over her chest, “but he’s come back to haunt us again!”

 Goten’s face was a shock but Kaifun didn’t think Goku was haunting them. “I don’t think he’s haunting anyone.”

 “That child is the spitting image of Goku. Children resemble their parents but this is ridiculous!” Mrs. Niver groaned frustrated. “What did I do to become so cursed? He’s probably in Hell laughing at us.”

 ****

 “Mmm! Ahhh!” ChiChi cried out with her face turned on a pillow. She bit her lip. She had to keep quiet. She couldn’t be as loud as before.

 But Goku’s mouth was so good and she needed this after so long. It was the first coupling since their baby’s birth. She and Goku were both eager for this night. Goku was ready more than her. All day he couldn’t resist touching and rubbing against her in anticipation.

 A leg wrapped around Goku’s back at her eager cry. She was close now. Biting her lip, ChiChi tried to subdue herself but Goku’s loving mouth and tongue, ultimately forced a loud cry to burst from her lips while her body convulsed.

 Her chest rose and fell rapidly as she recovered. She felt movement as Goku rose from between her legs. He licked his lips as she tried to catch her breath. “I think you taste even better, ChiChi.”

 Goku spread her wider as he pinned her left leg back and hooked her right leg over his shoulder. Her martial arts training always kept her body in great shape and helped her recover post-pregnancy. Still, Goku knew he had to be careful and patient for their first time. He was extra attentive preparing her body moments ago as he slowly eased himself into her.

 A sweet sigh escaped her lips as Goku stretched her insides. There was a slight pain but it was worth it to feel this again. “I missed this.”

 “You?” Goku groaned over her. “I missed it more than you.”

 ChiChi gripped a muscled pec as Goku filled her completely. “Really? Why don’t you show me?” Goku answered moving in her slow then….. fast.

 “Ah, you’re still so tight,” Goku gritted through thrusts. “Feels….. good.”

 “So…..” she gasped as Goku moved in and out of her. “….. do you.” Wrapping an arm around his neck, ChiChi pulled him closer for a kiss. The rhythm of their body was out of sync due to the break of the last month of her pregnancy and adjusting to life with a baby but with each thrust, each gasp and groan they were working their way back.

 Their coupling was perfect until the sound of a baby crying broke through the baby monitor. ChiChi tried to pretend it wasn’t true but the cry persisted. Goku was unaware as he continued to move in and out of her. ChiChi pressed her hands on Goku’s chest and pulled from his lips.

 “Wait. Stop, Goku.” ChiChi squeezed his chest harder. This ceased Goku’s movement. “The baby’s crying. Gohan needs me.”

 “Baby? Gohan?” Goku repeated confused. “ChiChi, Gohan’s ten. It’s Goten crying for you.”

 “Goten?” ChiChi saw a baby crib by the window. ChiChi got out of bed and went to the crib. Inside wasn’t baby Gohan but a baby resembling Goku. She turned to her bed to see Goku disappearing.  

 ChiChi’s eyes opened to darkness. Her ears nearly burned at baby Goten crying.

 It was only a dream.

 Goten cried even louder but ChiChi rolled on her side and stared at the empty, cold side of the bed left vacant by Goku.  

 ChiChi, Gohan and Goten returned home after two days in the hospital. After visits from Krillin, Bulma and Trunks, Aki and his family, ChiChi made it clear she wanted these first months to be a bonding time for her family. Only Gyu-Mao regularly visited as ChiChi and Gohan adjusted to a baby in the house.

 ChiChi turned on the lamp and shuffled across the room to Goten’s crib. “Mommy’s here, Goten.” ChiChi felt the problem as soon as she picked up Goten. She placed her son on her former sewing desk that became a changing area.

 “I should be mad at you. You took Mommy from a pleasant dream with Daddy.” She removed the soiled diaper. As she wiped Goten clean, she said, “But I can’t be mad at you. You’re our special baby. You’re the child we thought about making before Daddy died before his reunion. You’re the child we put on hold when Daddy came back after his fight with Freeza. We talked about having you for years. When Daddy died, I didn’t think it will happen but you are proof we were meant to have a second child.”

 With a fresh diaper on him, ChiChi fed Goten but being a half Saiyan, he drunk milk faster than her body could produce. He cried out of hunger as ChiChi carried him to the kitchen. To her surprise, she saw Gohan pouring milk formula into bottles.

 “Gohan, it’s after two a.m. You should be sleeping.”

 “I woke up.”

 “Goten?”

 Gohan shook his head as he squirted milk on his left wrist. “I went to bed early and I work up early.” He tested the milk. He handed the bottle to ChiChi. “It’s warm enough for Goten.”

 ChiChi took the bottle and fed Goten. She appreciated the help but didn’t want Gohan to do this. “You do this when you’re a father, Gohan. Not a big brother. Go to bed.”

 Gohan didn’t listen as he cleaned the dishes. “Did you get up a lot with me?”

 “It wasn’t only me,” ChiChi said as she settled in a chair at the kitchen table. “Your Dad got up, too.”

“Really?”

 “Dad didn’t always sleep when I checked on you. Sometimes he went with me or he brought you to me.” She chuckled at a sudden memory. “Our first night alone with you, Dad jumped out of bed and zoomed out of our room when you cried.”

 Gohan laughed. “Really?”

 ChiChi giggled. “We spent a few days with Grandpa before we took you home. His staff helped us but we were both nervous the first night we were alone with you.” Goten finished drinking a bottle. Gohan gave ChiChi another one while he cleaned the used one.  

 Despite wanting Gohan to go to bed, his kindness and willingness to help was appreciated and reminded ChiChi of Goku helping when Gohan was a baby.

 ChiChi had three bottles in a pot of hot water. Some days she produced enough milk for Gohan and some days she couldn’t. Dr. Barkley assured ChiChi the amount of milk she produced was normal. It was Gohan who had an extra appetite. Sometimes ChiChi felt the doctor knew there was another reason but wasn’t telling her. Dr. Barkley told her what Goku can do as a father to stimulate more milk. When ChiChi told him this, Goku was eager to help.

 “Gohan still hungry?”

 ChiChi saw Goku standing in the doorway. “Sorry Gohan woke you.”

 Goku yawned as he stepped into the kitchen. “Guess that’s my fault. Gohan eats like me.”

 “Don’t I know it,” ChiChi yawned as she paced with a crying Gohan. “Gohan emptied me but he’s still hungry. I didn’t produce enough milk for this feeding. Maybe in the morning, I’ll have enough. I’ll……” she paused when she felt Goku’s hand on her right breast. “Goku.”

 Goku wiggled his eyebrows at her as he gave her breast a gentle squeeze. “When Gohan goes to sleep, I’ll help you.” He sealed this promise with a kiss before taking Gohan out of her arms. He bounced his baby boy in his arms as ChiChi tested a bottle on her wrist. “Are the bottles ready?”

 ChiChi licked the warm milk on her wrist. “Yes.” ChiChi reached to take Gohan out of Goku’s arms but he took the bottle out of her hand. “I’ll watch Gohan. Go to bed.”

 “But…..” ChiChi hesitated.

 “You played with Gohan all day.” He grinned. “It’s my turn.”

 ChiChi thought to protest but changed her mind. Goku spent most of the day working on Mr. Olitz’s farm. When he came home, Gohan was already sleeping. “All right.” ChiChi left. She returned to her bedroom but before she climbed in bed, she wondered about Goku and if he can really handle Gohan. He was fussier and more active now. It might be too much for Goku.

 ChiChi quietly returned to the living room. There, she saw Goku sitting on the sofa feeding Gohan his bottle. “Ya just like your Pops. Eat like me; got a tail like me; got my eyes but I see some of Mommy, too.”

 Goku put down the empty bottle and reached for another one. “Full?” Goku rubbed the bottle’s nipple around Gohan’s mouth. He turned his head. Goku put the bottle down. “You’ll be hungry in another hour like me.” Goku stood and rubbed Gohan’s back while pacing the room.

 “Kind of wild you’re mine, Gohan. I never thought about being a Daddy. Bulma has a Daddy. I saw Daddies when I traveled but I never pictured that for me.” Gohan rested his head on his Daddy’s shoulder. The way he looked at Goku it was as if he understood his words. “I didn’t think about the future except fighting and winning the tournament. Good thing Mommy found me and reminded me of our promise.”

 ChiChi noticed Goku grinning. Was he thinking about them meeting again? “Sometimes I think of what would’ve happened if Mommy didn’t find me. I think I would’ve come back here. I’d be happy…… but not like now.” Gohan released a small belch. ChiChi shook her head as Goku looked over his shoulder. “Oops. Forgot that bib thing.”

 Goku lifted a giggling Gohan over his head. “You like spitting on Daddy?” Gohan answered with a laugh. “I forgive ya. I’ll probably forgive ya for anything.” Gohan squealed as Goku raised him higher. “Grandpa told me he’ll forgive me for anything, too.” ChiChi worried over Goku flying Gohan over his head. Gohan may spit up even more. Goku realized that, too. He lowered Gohan but held him close. As she watched the two, ChiChi noticed a change on Goku’s face. He smiled as always but he stared at Gohan for a very long moment. Gohan reached out to touch Goku’s face. His tiny hand touched Goku’s nose, his cheek and lips before the child suddenly stopped to stare at him. It was as if father and son were silently communicating with each other.

  “Grandpa said something to me I wanna say to you.” Goku embraced Gohan tenderly against his chest. “Gohan, I’m so happy you’re mine.”

 ChiChi turned away with a hand over her mouth. Tears streamed down her face as she returned to her bedroom to give Goku private time with Gohan.

 “Yup. Your Dad was very helpful.” ChiChi settled Goten’s head on her shoulder and patted his back gently. “But, Gohan, this is my responsibility. They’ll be plenty of time for you to do this when you’re a Daddy. Go to bed.”

 “I just want to help.”

 “You did. I appreciate this but this isn’t your job.”

 “Okay,” Gohan gave in. Everything was clean anyway. “Good night, Mom.” Gohan patted Goten’s head. “Good night, Goten.”

 When Gohan left, ChiChi gazed at the ceiling. Goten’s cooing warmed her heart but ChiChi burst with pride thinking of Gohan. “We did a good job with Gohan, Goku. You’re not here but look after me as I care for Goten and try to do a good job with him.”

 ****

 “That fight with Olibu was tougher than I thought it would be.” Goku rubbed a shoulder. “But I got him.”

 “He’s improved since he died,” King Kai complimented as he walked alongside Goku. “Imagine how much stronger you will be after a thousand years.”

 “He’s a good fighter,” Goku praised the blonde warrior. “But he talks so much. He asked so many questions about Earth.”

 “He’s from Earth, Goku, and you’re the first Earthling he’s spoken to in a while. Olibu spends most of his time on the Grand Kai’s planet. I think the last Earthling he’s seen is Master Mutaito and he spends most of his time here with non-warriors.”

 They were in the part of Heaven where good people who weren’t fighters resided. It was King Kai’s idea for Goku to split his time into different parts of Heaven. “This place is huge. I don’t think I will ever reach its limits.”

 “That’s because there are no limits,” King Kai reminded him. “This place is home of the dead for thousands of years and all planets in the galaxy.”

 Goku and King Kai stopped to allow a group of flowing spirits to pass them. “I haven’t seen any Saiyans.”

 “Goku, your race didn’t have a reputation for being good people. They are in Hell or their spirits have been reincarnated.”

 “Like my parents?” In a rare moment of awkwardness, Goku appeared uncomfortable. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know I probably couldn’t see them, but after meeting Grandpa again…… I just thought……”

 “They were reincarnated many years ago.”

 “I thought so.” Goku wasn’t surprised but there was disappointment in his voice. “I know I shouldn’t have expected them to be… but I thought since I’m dead……” he trailed off as something caught his eyes.

 King Kai continued walking unaware he left Goku. “Nothing wrong with wondering, Goku. I would’ve been concerned if you didn’t ask. There’s a transition everyone experiences after they die. Just like the living has to get used to their loved ones being dead, the dead has to get used to not being around the living. The first time you died you didn’t think about this since you knew you were going back, but this time it’s permanent and I know you weren’t thinking of leaving so soon.”

 King Kai’s sage words were met with silence. Looking around, he noticed Goku wasn’t beside him. Goku stared at a couple. Returning to Goku’s side, King Kai tried to understand what about this couple caught Goku’s interest. The man wore a dark suit and the woman wore a white dress.  

 “They look like Earthlings,” King Kai remarked. “Did you know them, Goku?”

 “No…….” Goku continued staring. “But they died on their wedding day.”

 “Wedding?” King Kai repeated. “Oh, that’s the bonding ceremony for humans. Death claims anybody at anytime, Goku.”

 “The woman has a bun in her hair like ChiChi.” The woman’s dress reminded him of ChiChi’s, too. Goku heard King Kai talking but his mind traveled to his wedding day.

 “Do you like being married, Goku?” ChiChi and Goku soared on Nimbus after saying goodbye to everyone. The fun wedding was over and it was time for their honeymoon to start. With the time they spent before this day, Goku had an idea of what will happen alone with ChiChi and looked forward to it.

 Since their “I do’s”, Goku and ChiChi were caught up in a whirlwind of activity: taking pictures together and with guests, talking to guests (ChiChi did most of that), eating (Goku did most of that) and dancing.  

 So far, Goku liked being married. “It hasn’t been long but I like it. I didn’t know we had to talk to so many people.”

 “That’s what happens at a wedding. So many people come together to celebrate the start of our lives.”

 “Start of our lives?”

 “Yes, Goku. After today, we’ll spend a lot of time alone.” ChiChi nuzzled her nose against his neck. “We’ll get to know each other even more. We’ll do many things together. We’ll have children, grandchildren and grow old together.”

 Goku’s eyes grew wide. “That’s a lot.” And some of it he didn’t understand like the children part, but if ChiChi was willing to show him, he was willing to try.

 ****

 “Eat some more carrots,” Goku dipped a spoonful of mashed carrots in a baby jar of smashed apples. “And apples, Gohan.” He brought the spoon to Gohan’s lips. His baby boy obediently opened his mouth to receive the food. “That’s a good boy. This food will make you big and strong like me.”

 ChiChi placed lunch dishes for her and Goku on the table. “Smells good.” Goku opened his mouth as ChiChi held a spoonful of food for him.

 He turned away to feed Gohan. While Gohan chewed his food, Goku got fed by ChiChi again. ChiChi took a moment to feed herself and Goku before he fed Gohan. The three tried to stay in sync with eating but food spilled on Goku and Gohan. Most of the food was eaten but Gohan was sloppier than him when lunch was over.

 “Gohan’s a mess,” ChiChi frowned at Gohan’s food covered face as she gathered the empty dishes. “I think you got more food on Gohan’s clothes than his mouth.”

 “He ate enough.” Goku pulled Gohan out of his highchair. “He ain’t crying so he ain’t hungry.”

 “I suppose,” ChiChi weakly agreed as she placed the dishes in the hot sink. “I’ll bathe Gohan while the dishes soak.”

 “Imma give me and Gohan a bath, ChiChi,” Goku told her. He was almost out of the room when ChiChi asked him, “You’re happy, aren’t you, Goku?”

 “Hmm?”

 “Happy,” ChiChi repeated. “On our wedding day, I asked if you like being married. You said it was still early but you liked it so far.”

 “I still meant it. I like it even more now I understand.” He made a silly face at Gohan who burst into giggles. “If I didn’t marry you, we wouldn’t have Gohan. I’m glad you came back in my life.”

 ChiChi came to Goku’s side. She pressed a kiss on Gohan’s cheek. “I’m glad, too.”

 “So, why did you ask if I am happy?” Now Goku was curious.

ChiChi shrugged. “I know you’ve been used to fighting all your life. I wasn’t sure how settling down made you.”

 “Oh.” Now he understood. Sort of. “Well, I like fighting but this is fun, too, and I kinda wanted a break.” Since his encounter with the Red Ribbon Army, all Goku did was fight. He only meant to collect his Grandpa’s four-star dragon ball but it spiraled into him taking down the Red Ribbon Army with no break in between to prepare for the next tournament. “Before we married, it was years before I relaxed and not fight for something or prepare for one. I’m glad to take it easy and do other things. I’ll get another fight soon, but I’m happy with life now.”

“And it’ll be long life now there’s peace in the world, Goku. We’ll get to see our son grow up in peace, marry and have grandkids for us to play with.”

 Goku and ChiChi had three more years before their family life spiraled where they were separated for two years. In the last three years, the family was together but Piccolo lived with them. It wasn’t the same. Their lives were forced on hold. Their plans to expand their family was put on hold. Goku thought they will have time after the Artificial Humans were defeated but it wasn’t until the days before the Cell Game Goku realized how much time was wasted.

 “Goku?”

 His teacher knew him enough to understand the emotions churning in him and Goku didn’t want to share it. There was one he wanted to share his emotions with but she wouldn’t be here for a long time.

 “I’m fine, King Kai.”

 “The transition will pass,” the Lord of the North promised. “It’s a process you have to go through.”

 “I know.” He understood. He was dead. He can’t go back home. He won’t see his family for years. In a place where time isn’t measured Goku didn’t know how long the wait will be.

 “Daddy, how long do we have to wait for Mommy?”

 Goku and King Kai spotted a young man walking towards them holding a child in his arms. The child wore a similar uniform Gohan wore when he attended preschool. The way the child clutched his father reminded Goku of Gohan doing the same when he was so young.

 “I don’t know, Kiev. We’re dead now and it will be a while before Mommy sees us.”

 “It’s my fault we died, Daddy,” Kiev sniffled. “You died because you tried to save me. I’m sorry.”

 “It’s not your fault and I’ll do it again. We were meant to die together and wait for Mommy. I would never let you be here by yourself.” The father hugged his son. “We’re a team. We’re always gonna be a team. Okay?”

 “Okay, Daddy.”

 Father and son smiled in passing at Goku and King Kai. King Kai observed Goku’s stoic face. He was lost again in another memory. King Kai didn’t want Goku to feel pain but knew he had to. So far, Goku wasn’t going through the normal process of accepting death. That’s why he wanted Goku to spend his time between these two worlds. It was finally happening and as painful as this is, King Kai knew Goku will grow immensely from it.

Goku strolled home with a giant boar under one arm and a giant fish slung over his shoulder. There was always enough food to eat but ChiChi always kept the refrigerator and pantry stuffed with food. An empty shelf meant they were running low.

 Today Goku hunted and tomorrow he’ll train. ChiChi didn’t mind as long as he spent time with Gohan when he’s home from school. Goku agreed. Plus, he loved spending time with Gohan. This weekend they were going camping. Goku looked forward to that.

 When he entered his yard, Goku noticed ChiChi coming out of the house in a rush. She looked upset.

 Goku picked up his pace to ChiChi. “What’s wrong?”

 “Gohan’s school just called. Gohan was in the playground with his classmates when kids from another class picked on his tail. One kid tried to grab it. The teacher intervened but Gohan started crying. He jumped in a tree won’t come down.” She sighed, “I need to get him.”

 Goku lowered the animals on the ground. His frown mirrored ChiChi’s. “This is the third time this happened.”

 “I know,” ChiChi agreed. “We handled the kids in his classroom but I didn’t think about those other kids.”

 “Does Gohan need to go to preschool?” Goku asked. “You taught him stuff before he went. You can keep doing that.”

 “Gohan needs to socialize with children his age, Goku. He can’t be around us all the time.”

 “Then let me train him,” Goku insisted. “A kid tried to pull his tail today. Gohan needs to defend himself.”

 “Gohan doesn’t need to defend himself. The child tried to pull his tail. He didn’t throw a fist.”

 “Gohan’s crying in a tree and won’t come down!” Goku argued. “He wouldn’t have done that if he knew how to defend himself.”

 Normally, ChiChi would argue but when she didn’t, Goku knew ChiChi agreed with him. “I know,” she sighed. “But he’s too young to fight, Goku. We gotta do something else. Maybe Gohan should hide his tail while he’s in school.”

 “Gohan ain’t hidin’ his tail.” Goku was offended ChiChi suggested that. “I never did. Ain’t nothing wrong with Gohan’s tail.”

 “I know that, but I’ve been around kids, Goku, and kids are blunt. They don’t understand how mean they can be and teaching Gohan to defend himself won’t solve the problem. Gohan has to learn to ignore the words like you did otherwise he’ll fight anyone who says anything bad about his tail and that’s not our baby.”

 “No…..” Goku didn’t want that either. He was called stupid a lot, even by his friends and during his travels, his tail got attention. It never bothered Goku. He didn’t care what they thought but Gohan was different. Words bothered him like it did ChiChi sometimes. When the three were out together, sometimes they got stares or giggles and it was at Gohan who never noticed thanks to him and ChiChi.

“I’ll pick up, Gohan,” Goku decided. “I’ll talk to him.”

 “Okay,” ChiChi agreed. “I’ll make Gohan’s favorite.”

 Gohan wasn’t the only one in the family to receive stares. Goku received them when he dropped off or picked up Gohan on Nimbus. In the playground, Gohan’s teacher and classmates surrounded the tree. They tried encouraging Gohan to come down. Gohan didn’t listen as he sat on a high branch and clutched the tree trunk crying.

 “It’s Gohan’s Daddy on the cloud!” A child pointed at Goku flying in.

 Nimbus slowly floated to Gohan who cried so loudly he didn’t hear them. “Gohan…. it’s Daddy.”

 Gohan pulled away from the tree trunk. His teary face lit up! He jumped from the tree and into Goku’s arms. “Daddy!!”

 Nimbus lowered to the ground. Gohan’s classmates gathered around Nimbus and touched the cloud in aww and pleas to get on it. “I’m taking Gohan home.”

 “Of course. I’ll bring Gohan’s bag. Come, children,” the teacher ushered the whining kids away from the cloud.

 Goku wiped away Gohan’s tears. “Wanna tell Daddy what happened?”

 Gohan sniffed. “I was playing in the sandbox when a kid asked about my tail. He thought it was a toy and wanted to pull it. I wouldn’t let him. Other kids tried to grab it so I ran and I got in the tree.”

 “Mr. Son?”

 Goku noticed Gohan’s teacher returning with Gohan’s lesson bag and school hat. She waved him over implying she wanted to speak alone.

 “Stay on Nimbus,” Goku told Gohan as he got off and walked to Gohan’s teacher.

 The teacher handed Goku Gohan’s belongings. “I tried to stop the teasing. The kids in my class know not to do that but not the other children.”

 “Guess it can’t be helped.”

 “Gohan did something unusual, Mr. Son.”

 “Unusual?”

 The teacher nodded. “I was right here when I saw the kids teasing. I was coming over when Gohan ran from them and suddenly jumped into the tree. He jumped twenty feet off the ground. He didn’t climb the branches at all.”

Goku looked at the tree in question. “Gohan jumped all by himself?” He knew it. He knew Gohan has strength in him. Goku took Gohan’s belongings and returned to the cloud. As Nimbus began the journey home, Goku asked, “So, you got up the tree by yourself?”

 Gohan shrugged. “I guess so. I was on the ground and then I was in the tree.”

 “You don’t remember how you got there?”

 Gohan shook his head. “No, Daddy.  Daddy, how come I have a tail? My classmates don’t have one and the kids at Grandpa’s village don’t have a tail either. Why do I have one?”

 ChiChi warned him Gohan will have these questions one day and they should talk about it but Goku refused. He didn’t care people asked about his tail. He thought Gohan would react the same way. Now he saw he was wrong. “Because you’re my son.” He ruffled Gohan’s head. “I had a tail when I was a kid, too.”

 “What happened to your tail?”

“It was removed.”

 “Why?”

 Kami explained but now Goku doubted that was true. Why would it be trouble for the world if he kept his tail? “Kami told me it had to be removed. It had to do with the safety of the world. I believed him then but now I think I was tricked. If I could do it over again, I would keep my tail.”

 “Did other kids talk about your tail, too, Daddy?”

 Goku laughed. “My tail was the last thing they talked about. People called me stupid. They wondered why I was so strong. They wonder why they couldn’t kill me.” Gohan giggled. “Ah, is that a smile I see? You think it’s funny people wanna kill Daddy?”

 Gohan shook his head laughing. “It’s funny people think they can kill you. You’re the strongest person in the world, Daddy. No one can beat you.”

 Goku liked to believe that but he wasn’t that naïve. Gohan was all smiles now in his lap and waving at the birds that passed. Gohan was happy but talk about his tail bothered Goku. “Gohan, do you hate your tail?”

 “No. I like it but I don’t like people calling me names because I have a tail.”

 Goku was very glad to hear Gohan didn’t hate his tail but he needed to work on his son not caring what others think. “Gohan, you shouldn’t care what people say. It’s more important what you think.”

 “What about you and Mommy?” Gohan asked worriedly. “Should I care what you two think?”

“I guess,” Goku slowly answered, not certain himself, “but me and Mommy can be wrong, too. No matter what, Gohan, me and Mommy will be happy with what you want.”

 Gohan grinned at Goku. Seeing his little boy’s face light up really made Goku happy. “Okay. Daddy.”

 “I guess words can hurt but ya gotta be strong, Gohan, and I know you are.”

 “I’m not strong like you, Daddy, but I’ll try.”

 “You are strong like me, Gohan. You just don’t know it yet, but one day, you’ll see. Now,” Goku tickled Gohan who burst into giggles and pleas for Goku to stop, “wanna race home? Mommy’s making your favorite!”

 “Yay!” Gohan cheered.

 “Tell Nimbus to fly faster.”

 “Faster Nimbus!”

 Father and son laughter echoed in the sky as they zoomed home.  

 It was bittersweet for Goku how Gohan realized how strong he is. He always pictured sharing this moment with Gohan together but they were separated and have to deal with it alone. As much as he told Gohan to not feel sad about him being dead, Goku knew Gohan was sad and ChiChi…. His mind played over ChiChi wailing on the floor at his dead.

 ChiChi, I’m so sorry.

 “King Kai, I think I will visit Grandpa.”

 “Okay, Goku. Take your……” Goku was already flying away, “……time.”

 ****

  “We are not blood but you do take after me, my boy.” Gohan Sr. observed the glum composure of Goku. “When I had time alone, I thought about my decision and regret not telling you about that tail.”

 Dealing with sadness wasn’t something Goku was accustomed to. He didn’t like being sad. He didn’t like dealing with his emotions if they weren’t happy. “I thought it was the right decision.”

 Whack!

 “Ow! Grandpa!” Goku rubbed the back of his stinging head. He was dead but Grandpa Gohan smacks still hurt. “Why did you hit me?”

 “I was silent because I was protecting you. Only I was at risk not telling you the truth. Your decision took you from your family!”

 “Your decision took you from me,” Goku argued. “I had to live in the woods alone for years.”

 Whack!

 “My mistake should’ve told you to not stay dead.” Grandpa Gohan scolded Goku.

 Goku rubbed the back of his neck irritably. “I didn’t wanna stay dead, Grandpa, but I kept putting everyone in danger. My brother came for me and kidnapped my son. I defeated Freeza and he tried to kill everyone on Earth. I was only trying to find the dragon ball you kept when I met the Red Ribbon Army. A friend’s Dad was murdered because they wanted the dragon balls I had.” He was pacing now and the more Goku thought on this, the angrier he got. “I defeated the Red Ribbon Army to get the dragon balls to bring that friend’s Dad back to life and sixteen years later someone I never met when I fought the Red Ribbon Army wanted revenge on me. His revenge almost destroyed the world! In another timeline, everyone’s dead! Everything bad happening was tied to me!”

 Goku was in his Super Saiyan form now. His gold aura was almost blinding. Grandpa Gohan cautiously approached Goku. He placed a weathered hand on Goku’s strong shoulder. The simple contact was enough for Goku to depower to his base form.

 Ashamed at his outburst, Goku turned away from Grandpa Gohan. “I just wanted to fight for fun, Grandpa, but it kept hurting everyone. Gohan’s childhood was taken. Me and ChiChi never had a chance to make more children. When I was coming home from space, I thought I was done being the hero. I thought I was going back to a peaceful planet and me, Gohan and ChiChi can go back to our lives but Trunks showed up. Three more years.” Goku sighed as he gazed at the peaceful horizon. “I thought this was it. I thought after this fight, everything will be normal again. I wouldn’t grow bored with Piccolo and Vegeta around. Me and ChiChi can have more kids and Gohan can be what he wants.”

 Goku sat on the grass emotionally exhausted. Nothing went as he thought. “When I was sick, I realize I didn’t have as much time as I thought. I wasted so much time putting off things, Grandpa. We really wanted another baby. ChiChi wanted peace so me and Gohan didn’t fight anymore. I could only give her that by staying dead.”

 Grandpa Gohan squeezed Goku’s shoulder gently. “But it’s not what you wanted… is it?”

 Grandpa Gohan heard a sniff from Goku before he shook his head. “No…..”

 “Regrets and missed opportunities are things we have to deal with when we crossover, Goku. You can’t go back. You have to come to terms with it and move on because there isn’t a guarantee you’ll meet again.” Grandpa Gohan hesitated but decided Goku needs to understand everything. “Even here. Everyone doesn’t keep their bodies, Goku. Your family may cross over as floating spirits.”

 That crossed Goku’s mind whenever he saw the floating spirits. Gohan may keep his body since he saved the world but what about ChiChi? She was a good person. She could fly Nimbus but was that enough for ChiChi to keep her body? King Yemma seemed selective on who kept their body and who didn’t.

 Coming to terms with all of this was harder than Goku thought since the consequences were still fresh. He didn’t know what constitutes as a day here but Goku thought many didn’t go by without him thinking about the Cell Game and Gohan. “I didn’t prepare Gohan like I should’ve, Grandpa. He didn’t listen to me when I told him to finish Cell.”

 “You said Gohan never acted this way before. If he did in that room, you would’ve warned him about the Saiyan rage.”

 If only that was all. “It’s not just that, Grandpa. I didn’t tell Gohan he will fight Cell.”

 “Why didn’t you?”

 “I think deep down I didn’t want Gohan to fight. I wanted to finish Cell off myself. It was created for revenge against me and I always fight my battles.” Goku put a hand over his heart. It was still strange to not feel a heartbeat. “But my body reached its limit.” That wasn’t the only reason. “I knew Gohan didn’t summon his rage like me but when he got mad, he was stronger than everyone but Gohan couldn’t naturally pull it. He had to be triggered. That was the flaw.”

 Grandpa Gohan rubbed his mustache. “That is a problem.”

 “Things were pretty bad when Gohan finally released it.” Goku felt pretty good seeing the shock on everyone’s faces when Gohan ascended. No one believed it. Everyone thought he was crazy but Goku knew what he was doing. “But when he did, it was amazing, Grandpa. Gohan has this tremendous power. When we trained, it was what I always wanted. Me and Gohan spending the day sparring, watching him grow stronger. It was just like you and me, Grandpa.”

 Grandpa Gohan could feel Goku’s pride. He felt the same when he trained Goku. “Made you feel pretty good seeing that.”

 “Yeah,” Goku agreed. He burst with pride thinking of how strong Gohan is. “I don’t have much to offer Gohan so it feels good teaching him something I’m good at. He’s so smart and responsible. He’s so much better than me, Grandpa. I’m really proud of him.”

 Grandpa Gohan felt that pride, too, because of how well Goku turned out and not for how strong he became. “Don’t be down on yourself, my boy. You’ve done more than I ever imagined. I worried you’d stay in the mountains forever but you didn’t. You traveled the world and universe. You saved so many people. You married a fine woman and have a great son. Be proud of your accomplishments because I am.”

 Seeing his kind Grandpa smiling at him with the same love and pride he felt for his son nearly overwhelmed Goku. “Thanks, Grandpa.”

 “My great-grandson sounds like a fine, young man, Goku. When we sparred together, there was no purpose other than our enjoyment and discipline for you.” The elder laughed, “You were a rambunctious child. For you and your son, sparring was great bonding but there was a purpose to your fighting.”

 “Yeah. Gohan doesn’t fight like me but he does like it. Maybe it would’ve been different if I trained him first. I wanted to when Gohan was one but ChiChi said no.”

 “One?” Grandpa Gohan laughed. “That’s too young! You were almost four when I showed you the basics. You were too eager with your son. No wonder your wife said no.”

 That wasn’t the only reason. “ChiChi thought Gohan should focus his mind on education.”

 “Nothing wrong with that. I tried schooling you, too. You did the work but you had more interest in martial arts. It held your attention more than schooling. You had a natural talent for martial arts so I nurtured it.”

 Nurtured. ChiChi said that about Gohan. She thought Gohan’s fast development meant he was special and his brain should be nurtured. ChiChi read to Gohan daily. She was so happy when Gohan brought her books for her to read to him. As often as he trained in the yard and knew Gohan watched him, Gohan never asked to be taught. Gohan only wanted to play. When Goku initiated basic martial arts, Gohan showed he had a natural talent but not the interest.

 It took longer for Gohan’s interest to come out. Maybe if Gohan wasn’t kidnapped and forced into it by Piccolo, he would’ve developed a natural interest in fighting sooner.

 Training with Gohan alone and seeing him display that power against Cell was confirmation for Goku Gohan did enjoy fighting. Goku saw it as a good thing Gohan didn’t fight like him. That meant his interests can expand. Gohan can do the school stuff like ChiChi wants but he can do the fighting stuff like me, too. Gohan’s smart enough to balance both. I wonder how much stronger Gohan will be when I see him again.

 Reality hit again how he will miss seeing Gohan grow up and grow stronger and thinking of Gohan, got Goku thinking of ChiChi and how he misses her. There’s no more waking up to her in the morning. He can’t eat her cooking; hold her hand when they stroll Mount Paouz, soak in the cauldron together or engage in anymore intimacy. No more family dinners, holidays or sitting together after dinner enjoying games together.

 ChiChi crying on the floor and Gohan comforting her after his death were his last memories and it’ll be a long time before he can apologize to both of them.  If he can. He didn’t forget about the floating spirits.

 “Grandpa, how do you deal with the wait?”

 Transition to death was hard. Grandpa Gohan experienced hardship accepting this life when he crossed over. It would’ve been easier if he didn’t worry about the child he left behind. Now that child was a man going through it, too. “There’s no timetable, Goku. It comes from accepting this is your home. There’s a new life here to explore; new friends to make. Time here passes differently and you’ll be so busy getting stronger and making new friends, your family will crossover before you realized a lifetime has passed.”

 As always Grandpa knew what to say but accepting this new home meant accepting, really accepting he won’t see his family for a long time and that was something he could only do alone. “Thanks, Grandpa. If you don’t mind, I want to be alone now.”

 My boy, you really have grown up. The old man stood and gently patted Goku’s shoulder. “Take all the time you need.”

  *****

 It was rare for ChiChi to enjoy a quiet afternoon at home. Goten slept, Gohan was away visiting Piccolo on Kami’s Temple and her father left an hour ago with toys for Goten. She didn’t need to start dinner for another hour and used this quiet moment to read while drinking her favorite tea.

 ChiChi was engrossed in a climactic chapter of her book when the doorbell rang. Closing her book, ChiChi looked out the window and saw an airship in her yard. There were several men dressed in black suits standing outside. Curious, ChiChi opened the door to see the King of Earth on the other side with two tall men in black.

 “Your Majesty.” ChiChi bowed before the dog king.

 “I’m sorry for coming unannounced.” The king bowed before ChiChi. “May I come in?” He signaled his bodyguards to wait outside.

 “Of course.” ChiChi stepped aside to let the ruler of Earth in. She had her suspicions on his visit but hoped to be wrong. “Would you like some tea?”

 “No, thank you. I won’t stay long.”

 ChiChi invited him to sit on the sofa. “What brings you here?”

 “The first anniversary of the Cell Game is approaching. Mr. Satan is lauded as the one who killed Cell. There will be a parade and ceremony at my castle.” Verbally, ChiChi didn’t speak but the king saw pain in her eyes. “I can’t shake this feeling it’s not true. Son Goku killed King Piccolo. He saved us from his son. It’s been a few years since I’ve seen him but I could’ve sworn I saw Son Goku at the Cell Game. A man with blonde hair looked like him.”

 “Oh.” Now she had confirmation. “So, that’s why you are here.”

 The King’s fur bristled in worry. Something was wrong. “Is Son Goku around? I’d like to speak to him.”

 ChiChi dwelled on the question before finally saying, “My husband died nearly a year ago.”

 “Nearly a year ago?” he picked up. He was afraid to ask but did so anyway. “Son Goku was at the Cell Game, wasn’t he? That little boy that fought Cell….. was that Son Goku’s son?”

 Goten’s crying from the baby monitor saved ChiChi from answering. “Excuse me.” ChiChi rose and hurried out of the room.

 Alone, the King of Earth toured the room. He went to the wall of photographs to get a closer look at the pictures. There were many of Son Goku with his wife and son and one that confirmed what he suspected. A picture of Son Goku and his son with blonde hair.

 Oh, my Go—

 A soft gurgle made the King look away from the photograph to the baby in ChiChi’s arms. The baby was the spitting image of Goku and looked less than a year old.

 My husband died nearly a year ago.

 The truth hit the King like a ton of bricks.

 “My son gets fussy when he wakes from a nap and no one is around.”

 Shock coursed through the King of Earth as ChiChi settled in her seat. His mind spun over the truth and lie he was told. “Why didn’t you speak out? Son Goku died at the Cell Game. It wasn’t Mr. Satan that killed Cell. Son Goku died saving the world.”

 ChiChi waved a toy in her hand at Goten. Her focus was on keeping him happy. “Goku died at the Cell Game but it was our son, Gohan, who killed Cell.”

 This revelation shook the King of Earth to his core. “A child?” He remembered Gohan. He remembered seeing the power expel from the child. “It’s just as when Son Goku killed King Piccolo.” The King chastised himself for not realizing sooner. Son Goku saved the world from King Piccolo. Of course his son will save the world from Cell. “Why? Why didn’t you say anything? How could Mr. Satan take credit for what he didn’t do? Cities are being named after him. He’s getting a movie and book deals. I’m hosting a parade and ceremony for him!”

 Very rare in his life the dog King showed anger. He was always a calm and kind king but learning what Mr. Satan did infuriated him. “I’ll fix this. I’ll cancel the ceremony. I’ll tell the world the truth.”

 “Please don’t,” ChiChi pleaded.

 Don’t?! “But why? The world deserves to know the truth.”

 “My family deserves to live in peace. Do you think I want television crews around my home? Do you think I want my family harassed when we go out? My son is still struggling with the death of his father. I know the attention that fraud is getting. Cameras are following him everywhere. Do you think I want that for my family? The media is insane now. Goku didn’t get this attention when he beat Piccolo.”

 That was true. Over the years the media have become more obsessed with celebrities and Mr. Satan was doing his part adding more fuel to that fire.

 “The world never knew Son Goku killed King Piccolo. They knew a child did. It’s dumb luck Son Goku was never publicly connected to King Piccolo and Piccolo’s defeat.”

 “I guess I should be fortunate for small favors, but I can’t come forward with the truth.”

 With the celebrity obsession now, the King understood ChiChi’s reluctance but he didn’t like this silence. In his eyes, the world deserved to know the truth.

 “I hate what that fraud has been doing. I hate he’s making his money off my family’s hard work. I hate my husband will not get the recognition he deserves….” ChiChi’s voice shook as tears burst from her eyes. “I will never forgive that con artist but if being left alone is the price I have to pay for my family’s peace, then I accept it.”

 ChiChi’s cries caused Goten to suddenly cry. “I’m sorry, Goten,” ChiChi apologized to her baby. She rocked him gently to soothe his tears. “Mommy didn’t mean to cry.”

 Hiding the truth hurt ChiChi but her family came first. The King wanted rightful recognition for Son Goku but he couldn’t argue against his widow wanting peace for her family. Everything Son ChiChi said about the media would happen if they knew the truth.

 “I understand.” The King bowed before ChiChi. “One day, Son Goku and his son will get the recognition they deserve. I promise.”

 The King of Earth left the Son Family home very troubled and very conflicted. He didn’t want to honor ChiChi’s request. If there was a way to get the truth out without disturbing Son ChiChi’s peace, he will do that. Son ChiChi was right and wrong about the media. It’s a bit celebrity-obsessed but Mr. Satan sought the attention. Son Goku never did. He could’ve capitalized on his fame after defeating Piccolo. He could’ve gotten endorsements, a book and movie deal, made special appearances for money but instead retreated from society and his fight with Piccolo was a small footnote in history that the world forgot.

 In this last year, Mr. Satan did several promotions and appearances. He kept the Cell story alive and not let it be a forgotten news story. Perhaps he knew if he did, his fame and money will go, too. If the world knew the truth, Son ChiChi’s family will deal with some disturbance but it wouldn’t last long. Living far away from society, very few reporters would come here anyway. If Son ChiChi did one big interview, that will answer many questions and hinder anyone from returning.

 Telling the truth and betraying Son ChiChi’s wishes was something the King wrestled until the morning of the first anniversary of the Cell Game. Maybe it was the long sleep he got or confiding in his trusted advisor last night that he woke up this morning with clarity.

 I will honor the wishes of Son Goku’s wife. It’s the least I can do for her and the man who saved us.

 But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t let Mr. Satan know what he thought of him.

 His private office opened to loud, boisterous laughs of Mr. Satan bursting in. The more Mr. Satan lied and laughed the more irritated the King of Earth became. Dinner the previous night was insufferable. It took all in him to not lash out at Mr. Satan at his retelling of lies. Perhaps if his daughter wasn’t looking at him with pride he would’ve said something then.

 “Great day isn’t it, King!” Mr. Satan stepped to the window. He was pleased with the crowds of people gathering. “It’s a perfect day for so many people to come out and celebrate the end of Cell and my saving the world.”

 The King growled. If was like the four-legged dogs people kept as pets, he would bite Mr. Satan. “Before the ceremony begins, I want to talk to you.”

 “Sure.” Mr. Satan turned his attention back to the King. “Is this about how long my speech should be? I know I went long at the changing of my hometown’s name to mine but I promise to keep this one short. Thirty---- no twenty minutes.”

 “This isn’t about that.” This man didn’t know humility at all! “Today, I will give a speech honoring you and thanking you for defeating Cell. It will be the first and only lie I ever tell the people of this planet.”

 “Lie?” Mr. Satan kept his cool. There’s no way the King of Earth knew his dark secret. “What are you talking about, King? I defeated Cell. I saved the world.”

 “That is a lie and we both know it. I don’t know everything that happened at the Cell Game but I know the world wasn’t saved by you. It was saved by people who have far more integrity than you can ever have. It is only because of the great respect I have for the real savior, I don’t tell the world the truth. May mercy be placed on your soul when you meet King Yemma.”

 The harsh, brusque tone stunned Mr. Satan. His face warmed up and his heart thumped faster in his chest.  How did the King find out? The group with him at the Cell Game were the only ones who could blow his secret and Mr. Satan paid them off handsomely. If they spoke a word they lose all the money they have received. It was all tied up nicely unless one of those strange people at the Cell Game spoke.

 King Furry shook his head disgusted. The fraud still wouldn’t confess. “You have a daughter. How can you look at her every day and lie? How can you let her think you’re a hero when you’re a fraud? Where’s your honor?!”

 He’s a fraud. Mr. Satan knew that. The King can call him whatever he wanted but Mr. Satan didn’t accept his daughter being brought into the conversation.

 “Listen, King. You’re right. I didn’t kill Cell. One of those people in the group probably did it. I admit that but don’t bring my daughter into this. I’m doing this for her.” The King of Earth wasn’t moved and that bothered Mr. Satan. “Do you know who I was before the Cell Game? How broke I was? Sure I had some fame but no money to give my baby girl all she deserves and after losing her mother, she deserves everything!”

 Again the King of Earth was immune because he thought of the sweet face of a baby boy and his kind mother that wanted to protect the family of the real heroes. “If you want to use your daughter to gain sympathy from me, forget it. My sympathy goes to a baby boy that will never know his father and a boy that will grow into a man without him.”

 “Baby?” Mr. Satan repeated confused. Was this a made-up story from the King to make him feel guilty for what he’s doing? “I don’t know what you’re talking about but I did what I had to do for my daughter! Whoever killed Cell could’ve come forward but he never did. He doesn’t care what I’m doing so why should you? If he’s too dumb to capitalize on this, that’s his problem. Not mine. ”

 The King heard enough. Mr. Satan was thick-headed and blind with fame and ego. “One of these days, your daughter will know the truth. Remember that when you tell her you did it for her. I’ll honor you today but don’t expect another ceremony like this here again.”

 Mr. Satan accepted that. With his publicists, they can do celebrations every year elsewhere. He thought about using his fame to restart the World Martial Arts Tournament. It wouldn’t be a small affair like it was in the past. No. These will be big and flamboyant with multiple prizes. His future looked very bright except for one thing. The King of Earth knew his secret, and if he knew, how long it will be before the rest of the world knew?

 ****

 It was a sunny, warm day the first anniversary of Goku’s death. Gohan laid in bed that morning wide awake for an hour. He wanted to stay in bed and sleep the day away but knew he should get up. He needed to check on Mom. He heard her talking on the phone to Grandpa, Bulma and Krillin the last few days.

 No. I don’t want to do anything special, Bulma. I want to be home with my sons.

 No, Krillin, I think it’s best my sons and I stay together that day.

 I appreciate that, Dad, but I want to be alone with my sons.

 If Mom wanted to be around him and Goten today, then he shouldn’t stay in his room all day. Gohan left his room and went to the kitchen but he didn’t see his mother cooking. That was strange. She was always in the kitchen at this time.

 Gohan returned upstairs. He softly knocked on Mom’s door but after no answer, he turned the doorknob and quietly entered. Goten slept in his crib and Mom’s bed was empty and unmade. There was an open box by the closet. Gohan went to it and saw his Dad’s fighting gi.

 Putting pieces of this mystery together, Gohan noticed the bathroom door closed. Curious, Gohan pressed his ear against it. He heard soft sobs. Gohan slowly turned the doorknob to see his mother sitting on the bathroom floor crying into his Dad’s fighting gi. Gohan quietly closed the door.

 Gohan leaned on the door. Why did he look? Don’t cry. Don’t cry. You can’t cry anymore, Gohan. You have to be the man now. I have to be strong for Mom and Goten.

 After Goku’s death, ChiChi turned the top of the wooden chest into a shrine to Goku. It held a framed photo of Goku, a pot of flowers and incense. ChiChi arranged this months ago but it felt like yesterday to Gohan when she introduced him to it.

 “Dad’s gone but that doesn’t mean we can’t still talk to him and let him know what’s going on in our lives. I made this shrine so we can always talk to him. I’ll go first.”

 ChiChi stepped in front of the chest. “Goku, I have wonderful news for you.” ChiChi placed her hand on her round stomach. “I’m pregnant. We’re going to have another baby. Isn’t that wonderful? I know we talked about it since Gohan started preschool and things got in the way but it’s finally happening. It’s a boy.” ChiChi giggled. “I can see you throwing your fist in the air. I know you’re happy about that. Things will be different with him. I promise.”

 ChiChi turned to Gohan with a bright smile on her pretty face. “See, Gohan? It’s easy. Talk to your Dad, too. It’ll make you feel better.”

 Gohan didn’t speak to Dad’s shrine often. There was too much guilt but this morning Gohan felt compelled to talk.

 “Hey, Dad. It’s not a fun day today. You died a year ago. Mom doesn’t want to be around anyone except me and Goten. She’s crying in the bathroom and I don’t know what to do. It’s all my fault Mom’s crying. It’s my fault Goten won’t know you.”

 Gohan chewed his lower lip so he wouldn’t cry. “It’s my fault but I will make it right. I’ll protect Mom and Goten and be there for them.”

 As he made this promise, Gohan didn’t notice ChiChi quietly watching him.

 ****

 Breakfast passed quietly for Gohan. ChiChi and Goten were lively for different reasons. Even though he was born early, Goten still developed faster than human babies. At six months, Goten was a fast crawler and speaking one- or two-word sentences. Gohan noticed his mother talked about many things that morning; his lessons; a book she read; the weather; everything except the obvious: his father died today.

 After breakfast, Gohan gave Goten piggyback rides, chased Goten as he crawled over the house, played with his toys and concluded the morning watching TV. ChiChi played with them occasionally but spent most of the morning in the kitchen cooking for their afternoon picnic.

 “It’s a bright, beautiful day,” ChiChi said. “Instead of lunch inside, let’s have it in the yard.”

 Food covered the kitchen counters, stove and oven as ChiChi transferred food into serving dishes and picnic boxes. “I’m almost done. It’s time you two get away from the TV.”

 Goten sat in Gohan’s lap entertained by giant costume animals singing. “This show is fun, Mom. Goten likes it. I did, too. I used to watch this a lot.”

 “Yeah,” ChiChi agreed, “you did. You’d clutch your favorite stuffed rabbit while glued to the TV.” ChiChi looked up from her work. On the TV, the animals sang numbers and Goten repeated it a few. “At least it’s educational.”

 Gohan remembered this program and his stuffed rabbit from his early childhood. He wouldn’t go anywhere without it. After his kidnapping, Gohan never slept with his stuffed toys anymore. Goten had them now as companions.

 When the last commercial ended, Gohan expected another of Goten’s favorite program to start. Instead of seeing cartoon animals, a live feed of the King of Earth’s castle appeared on TV. There were crowds of celebratory people, marching bands and dancers. Gohan wondered what was going on until he saw Mr. Satan riding on top of a car waving at the people. In the car with him was the King of Earth waving very subdued.  

 Gohan saw him on TV a few times but generally avoided him. He didn’t want to see or hear Mr. Satan tell another lie of Cell. Goten wasn’t affected like his brother but he was bored not seeing his program. “’Han,” Goten tugged Gohan’s shirt. Goten was too young to fully pronounce Gohan’s name and could only call him Han. “TV?”

 “Sorry, Goten. Our program isn’t on today.” Goten frowned in the cutest grumpy face. “You can play with your toys.” He turned Goten to the alphabet blocks scattered on the sofa.

 “Ah!” Attention diverted, Goten reached for the blocks. He grabbed blocks and put letters together to make incoherent words.

 Meanwhile, Gohan watched the parade float take the King of Earth and Mr. Satan to a stage. Mr. Satan threw his arms up waving at the crowd and blowing kisses to his adoring fans. The King of Earth behaved with more decorum as he stepped to the podium. He spoke of the significance of this day and Mr. Satan’s heroics at the Cell Game.

 Heroics. Gohan scoffed. Gohan’s feelings for Mr. Satan were mixed. Gohan didn’t care about the media attention Mr. Satan captured but he wasn’t happy he took credit for what his Dad did. Dad died for everyone. He wouldn’t have beaten Cell without his Dad. Mr. Satan took credit for it and made a lot of money.

 The fame didn’t bother Gohan but the money did.

��When he was very young, Gohan remembered his Dad coming home with money on freelance jobs. While Dad was in space, Grandpa gave Mom money. He continued after Dad came home. Money never mattered to Gohan until he overheard a conversation with Mom and Grandpa two years ago.

 Today, there will be no training. It was a national holiday and Mom wanted him and Dad to take a day off and spend time together. Piccolo didn’t fly off this time. He took the day off, too. Gohan yawned as he shuffled out of bed. He left his room intending to get some fruit from the kitchen and read until breakfast is ready.

 In the hallway, Gohan heard the voices of his mother and Grandpa. Grandpa! Grandpa hasn’t visited much since Dad returned from space. Most times Gohan only saw Grandpa when they visited him in his castle. It was very strange to not see Grandpa around the house so much but Gohan figured that was due to him, Dad and Piccolo training for the Artificial Humans. They had one more year before their arrival and Gohan thought after that’s over, he will see more of his Grandpa again.

 “I can’t believe you have that kidnapper living in your house.”

 Grandpa sounded mad. Gohan didn’t hear this anger except when Grandpa talked about Dad when he was gone. Gohan remained hidden at the top of the stairs listening. From his view, Gohan saw Piccolo sleeping on the sofa with a blanket on him. Mom must’ve put that on him when she came downstairs. Feeling the level of his Ki, Gohan knew Piccolo was awake but pretending to sleep. Gohan saw a little of the kitchen from his view. Grandpa stood over Mom angry while she prepared several of her yummy donuts.

 “He’s a guest, Dad.”

 “Guests don’t stay for two years, ChiChi. He’s living here. He kidnapped my grandson. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

 “Of course it does. I didn’t like it when Goku brought him home but we are getting along. Piccolo regrets what he did to Gohan.”

 Grandpa sighed. “Oh, ChiChi. You’re being complicit. You and Gohan should’ve moved in with me two years ago.”

 Mom turned to Grandpa angry. “You expect me to leave my husband?”

“Is Goku being a husband to you?” The coldness of his Grandpa shook Gohan. “Besides, performing his husband duties to you, is he being a husband? He spends his days training with Gohan and Piccolo----”

 “You know why he is doing that,” Mom cut him off as she went back to her donuts.

 “He doesn’t work for the farmers anymore. Mr. Olitz offered Goku to come by once a week to do work so he can bring some money into the house.”

 There was that word again. Money. Was it really that bad for them?

 “He needs to train for the Artificial Humans,” Mom defended Dad.

 “So is everyone else, but they still need money to go about their lives now. I saw that Yamcha fella in a baseball game. I know the fight is in another year but you still have to live every day. If not for me, you wouldn’t have money to buy food for your family. You wouldn’t have money to buy Gohan a birthday gift.”

 Mom slammed a ball of dough on the counter. “What’s your point, Dad? Are you counting every cent of money you gave us? Are you expecting us to pay you back?”

 “No. I’m worried about you, ChiChi. I know this isn’t what you wanted. You moved out to be independent of me. You said you and Goku are adults and can take care of each other. I’ve been taking care of you financially half as long as you and Goku have been married.”

 Gohan noticed Mom stopped kneading the dough. She rubbed her arm over her eyes as if she were crying. Did it bother Mom that much?

 “After all this is over, Goku will get a job. We won’t depend on you anymore, Dad. We’ll be the independent adults I told you we will be.”

 Mr. Satan spoke at the podium. Gohan gripped the arm of the sofa tightly. Dad was dead and Mom still depended on Grandpa for money. Gohan noticed it more now since his Dad’s death Mom hated taking money from Grandpa. If she had some of that money Mr. Satan made, she wouldn’t depend on Grandpa anymore.

 Don’t we deserve that money?

 Suddenly the TV screen turned black. ChiChi held the remote. She looked as annoyed as Gohan felt. “Goten doesn’t need to see garbage. Lunch is ready.”

 The afternoon replicated a year ago: warm, sunny with few clouds in the sky. Only differences, there were no earthquakes of Cell fighting Goku and Gohan. No worriedly watching the TV of her husband and son fighting a monster. It was tranquil as Goten slept exhausted on the picnic blanket. Playing with Gohan most of the morning and eating ChiChi’s food exhausted the baby.  

 Mom’s food was great as always but Gohan’s thoughts were on the meaning of this day. He envied his brother not weighed with troubling memories but Gohan didn’t understand why Mom didn’t speak about what happened a year ago.

 “Is the food bad?”

 Gohan looked up at ChiChi gazing at him while she fixed her plate. “Hmm? No, Mom. It’s great.” He finished his sandwich to prove it.

 ChiChi smiled but the usual warmth didn’t reach her eyes. “I know today’s rough. This whole year has been rough. Sometimes, it’s hard to believe it’s been a year since Goku died.”

 Mom’s confession brought Gohan some relief. If Mom wanted to talk, maybe he can confess what’s on his mind, too. “Sometimes, I try to think Dad’s in space. It makes it easier.”

 “Maybe it’s easier but it doesn’t make it right,” ChiChi scooped a spoonful of potato salad on her plate. “I’ve been so busy with Goten, we never had that talk I promised we will have about Dad. It’s time, Gohan.”

 Gohan tensed slightly. Even though he knew it will happen, he still wasn’t ready for it.

 ChiChi added korokke to her plate. “Dad told you to finish Cell, but you didn’t want to. Why?”

Mom was calm. She spoke as if she will listen and not react strongly. It was comforting but didn’t ease the tightness in Gohan’s chest. “I didn’t think Cell suffered enough. I wanted him to pay. I don’t know what came over me, Mom, but Trunks said it happened to him, too.”

 “What happened?”

 Gohan combed his hair with his fingers agitated. “I don’t know if I can describe it, Mom. I was arrogant and I liked how strong I felt. I thought no one can stop me. I didn’t want to listen to anyone. Not even Dad.”

 So, that’s what happened. It affected Gohan, too. “Your Dad felt that, too, Gohan. It happened when he turned into a Super Saiyan.”

 Gohan filled his plate with more karaage. “Dad was really angry the first time he changed. It was scary but I know why he yelled at me.”

“One of the reasons Dad stayed away for a year, he wanted to control that Super Saiyan rage. On Yardrat, it spontaneously happened. It wasn’t safe being around him.”

 “Dad never told me this.” Gohan was disappointed to not know. “He told me he was recovering from his injuries and learning his teleportation trick.”

 “Dad didn’t want you to worry. He tried to keep it from me but I forced it out of him.” ChiChi was too busy filling her plate, explaining without thinking how cautious she should be. “Once Goku opened up, he told me stories he spontaneously burst into a Super Saiyan on Yardrat. It happened while he slept; while he ate, while he talked to the people on Yardrat. He thought he fully controlled it when he left but sometimes it still happened.”

 Gohan wondered where he were when this happened. “I never saw Dad change unless he wanted to. Sometimes I woke up feeling Dad’s Ki soar but I didn’t feel any threats. Dad was always around you.” Gohan thought that was strange but since he didn’t feel any threats, he ignored it. “If it wasn’t intentional, Mom, what happened to cause Dad to change?”

 ChiChi froze with her cheeks swollen with food. She never talked about Goku as a Super Saiyan with anyone. Bulma pried but ChiChi was tight-lipped. Distracted with food and talking about Goku, ChiChi let it slip something she hadn’t meant to say.

 “Hmm?” ChiChi feigned innocence.

 “What happened that caused Dad to change?”

 “Hah! Ahhh! Slow down, Goku.” ChiChi panted. “It’s hur…ahh!” she screamed as Goku slapped his body against hers.

 “I love your screams…..” Goku’s lustful voice breathed over ChiChi. “It boils my blood like your anger.” His powerful thrust caused ChiChi to cry out again. “That’s it. Scream for me.”

 ChiChi’s hips bounced off the bed at another powerful whap. The way Goku pummeled in her ChiChi was amazed her hips didn’t break.

 “Don’t worry.” Goku murmured over her. “I know how much you can take,” he slammed his body against hers. “And you can take a lot. You’re made for me….” One of his hands squeezed a breast. “Mine.” His mouth covered a nipple suckling and biting her flesh.

 “Goku….” His teeth hurt but ChiChi couldn’t deny how good he felt feeding off her breast and his body merging between her legs. He grabbed her left leg and pinned it behind her head, stretching her even wider as he pushed in and out of her rapidly. “I love how you keep your body fit for me.” He ignored her groans as he increased his thrusts. “I can twist your body anyway I desire and fuck you without breaking you.”

 Sweat from Goku dropped on her; his eyes and smiles were sinister. “Goku….” ChiChi grabbed a handful of his chest. “Too hard.”

 But Goku didn’t hear her as he kept slapping his body against hers faster. He was almost there and each quick thrust left her breathless to speak as she reached her end.

 “Rrgh!” Goku groaned as he came over her. Her body arched with the simultaneous intensity of her orgasm and his warm heat pouring into her. Dazed, she heard Goku’s, “That felt good. Didn’t it, ChiChi?”

 ChiChi only answered with heavy pants. Gazing at Goku, she noticed the change in his eyes. They weren’t feral anymore. Tears sprang from her eyes when she saw the guilt in his. He removed his hand from pinning ChiChi’s leg behind her head.

 As ChiChi lowered her leg, Goku depowered to his base form. “I did it again.” He kissed her tears. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Goku murmured repeatedly. His face buried in her neck as he kissed her apologetically. “I thought I had control in that form. I did on Yardrat.”

 ChiChi accepted the tender kisses. When Goku pulled back, ChiChi noticed his wet face. She couldn’t decipher if it were her tears or his. “Don’t apologize. We’re getting used to each other again.”

 ChiChi sounded hopeful but she knew Goku wasn’t happy with his behavior. “Maybe….. maybe we shouldn’t try it like this anymore.”

 ChiChi playfully tugged one of his spiky bangs. “You were the one who suddenly changed.”

 “I know,” he wasn’t happy he did. “I don’t know what happened. I saw you in your intimacy clothes and poof! Super Saiyan.”

 ChiChi kissed him. “I think that’s a compliment.”

 Goku wasn’t convinced this was a good thing. “It’s different now. Being a Super Saiyan completely changed me, ChiChi. I wanted control of it before I came home.” Goku’s voice was muffled as he buried his head in ChiChi’s hair. “I had control but I lost it, ChiChi. I don’t know what happened.”

 ChiChi understood but Goku didn’t. She pulled Goku’s head to lay on her breasts. Goku wrapped his arms around her like a scared child while ChiChi soothed him by caressing the spikes of his hair. “You did get control of those emotions, Goku. The problem is you got control of one kind of emotion.” Goku raised his head puzzled. “Goku, you got control of rage and bloodlust for fighting. You told me on Yardrat you remember intimate times with me. You suddenly burst into a Super Saiyan.” Goku nodded remembering.  “You controlled your emotions of rage sparked by fighting but you never had a chance to control your emotions of lust because I wasn’t there. Anger emotions and intimacy emotions are two different emotions, Goku.”

 Suddenly, it clicked for Goku. “Ohhhhh! So that means I have to get control of my lust emotions.”

 “You’re not the only one who has to train. I have to get my body stronger, too. I don’t wanna be worn out after one round with you as a Super Saiyan. We can achieve our goals with practice,” ChiChi advised as her hand glided down his muscled chest. “Lots of practice.”

 Goku grinned, liking that idea. “Like when we got married.”

 ChiChi remembered the short breaks before resuming intimacy multiple times, mornings she’d try to get out of bed but Goku pulled her back. There were afternoons after lunch Goku felt in the mood. “We had more time to practice. Not so much time now. Gohan. Your training.”

 “It’ll take longer,” Goku accepted as he crawled over ChiChi again. “But we’ll get there.”

 If Gohan didn’t know better he’d say Mom’s blushing. “I guess Dad suddenly changing into a Super Saiyan wasn’t bad but what triggered it?”

 ChiChi chewed an onigiri. She prayed she wasn’t blushing as she casually explained. “Past anger in fights and other experiences. Dad got it under control and um, I got stronger, too.”

 Got stronger? Gohan wondered what Mom meant until it hit him. “You and Dad trained together?!”

 “Do you think Mom is too weak to spar with Dad?” All the innuendos. ChiChi was so glad her son never caught on. If Goku were here, he would roll on the grass laughing. “I’m still a martial artist. Remember I did fight Dad when he escaped the hospital.”

 “Oh, yeah,” Gohan remembered the story ChiChi told at the family picnic before the Cell Game. “Wow, Mom.” Gohan was impressed. “You must be really tough to battle Dad as a Super Saiyan.”    

 ChiChi could see Gohan pondering more questions to ask but ChiChi turned the topic back on him. “So you didn’t feel this rage when you trained alone with Dad. It only happened at the Cell Game?” Gohan nodded as he reached for an apple. Is that why Goku never trained Gohan to control it?  

 “If I acted cocky in that room, I know Dad would’ve prepared me.” Gohan took a big bite into his apple. “One thing I don’t understand, Mom, is why Dad didn’t tell me I will fight Cell.”

 I know why he didn’t want to tell me, but why didn’t he tell Gohan? Goku, what the hell were you thinking? “I know his heart played a part in you fighting but Dad didn’t prepare you enough and that cost him his life, too.”

 “That’s not true, Mom.”

 “Dad knew you surpassed him but didn’t tell you, Gohan. He knew you will fight Cell but didn’t tell you until the Cell Game. I love your father, but he shares the blame, too.”

 Like her, Gohan could be stubborn. “No, Mom, you’re wrong. When we entered that room, Dad told me I will be a Super Saiyan and I will be stronger than him. I didn’t believe him because I never thought I can be stronger than Dad.” So many times Gohan thought over his time with Dad in that room. So many times he noticed things he missed when it happened. It made him feel even guiltier about his father’s death.

 “We’re not finished, Dad. You said you want me to be stronger than you. I’m not there yet. Maybe I will be when the year’s up.”

 “We are, Gohan. I’ve gotten as strong as I can and you…..” Dad was happy as always. “Gohan, you’re a Super Saiyan at nine years old. Four years ago, I was the only one. A year ago, it was me, Vegeta and Trunks. You’re younger than all of us. There’s no telling how much stronger you will be.  You’re stronger than me.”

 Gohan wished his Dad didn’t lie to make him feel better. “I’m stronger, Dad, but we know I’m not as strong as you. No one can be.”

 Gohan buried his face in his hands to hide the surfacing tears. “He told me, Mom. Before we left, he said I was stronger than him but I didn’t believe him.”

 ChiChi slid across the picnic blanket to enclose her arms around Gohan. Her brave boy. She held him as he gave into the tears and cried. “It’s not your fault you didn’t believe Dad, Gohan. As strong as you are, you were too young to be fighting.”

 “But I was the only one who could stop Cell!”

 Gohan’s pain broke ChiChi’s heart. “I know but you still weren’t ready and Dad didn’t see that. Your Dad asked me if he can bring you to that room. I told him to make you as strong as possible. I know that made him happy. Goku always wanted to train you, but in his excitement to finally do that, I don’t think he saw you didn’t have the same drive as him.

 “Your Dad and I both made mistakes. Dad saw your strength and thought it meant you’re like him. I saw an interest you have and went overboard with it.” Looking back, ChiChi saw flaws in both her and Goku’s parenting. “I did it because it was safe and not dangerous like your Dad’s interest but I also knew it was something you wanted.”

 Gohan rubbed his eyes as he tried to understand his Mom. “You mean studying?”

 ChiChi dried Gohan’s tears with a napkin. “Yes. We didn’t know about Dad’s lineage so we thought you were a special baby. You crawled, talked and walked so early. We both thought you were special and felt you should be nurtured but in different ways. I thought we should give you the best future possible and nurture your mind. I read to you every day. I taught you with flashcards and blocks so early at nine months you could put round, square and triangle pegs in the right hole.”

 That sounded like Mom. “What did Dad do?”

 “Dad taught you how to swim, helped you crawl and walk. He tested your reflexes and coordination. It was light training I approved of. Your Dad was very impressed at how quickly you developed physically. It gave him more reasons to think he should train you. The first time he asked you were barely a year old.”

 “A year?” Gohan laughed. “That’s kind of young.”

“Yup,” ChiChi agreed while fondly remembering Goku’s eagerness to train Gohan. “Every birthday he asked and I said no. Your Dad accepted that until a few months after your third birthday. I noticed Goku starting to lose patience and by your fourth, he was agitated, especially when you started preschool. He said, “’If Gohan can go to preschool, why can’t I teach him martial arts?’”

 “Kind of a stretch,” Gohan admitted. “I didn’t have to fight in school.”

 “No, but you did have issues. Some kids tried to pull your tail.”

 The incident drew a blank for Gohan. “It’s been so long since I’ve been to school I forgot a lot. I barely remember preschool.”

 “Do you miss school?” ChiChi thought after the fighting, Gohan will resume school but since Goku’s death, ChiChi hadn’t thought about sending Gohan to school and Gohan hadn’t asked to go.

 “I like being home. I want to be home with you and Goten.”

 ChiChi wanted him to stay, too, but knew he shouldn’t. “You can’t stay home forever, Gohan. You need to be around kids your age. You need to find your own group of friends and not just your Dad’s friends.”

 Maybe Mom was right but Gohan didn’t feel like socializing. “I will,” Gohan promised, “but let me stay home a little longer. I’m still catching up from missing three years of school.”

 ChiChi knew Gohan didn’t ‘miss’ three years of school. Even while training Gohan read and studied. He might have been a little behind but he wasn’t three years behind. “All right,” ChiChi gave in. “We won’t talk about you going to school yet.” Hearing her say that caused ChiChi to laugh at herself. “Oh, my. Your father is influencing me from the grave. Me not send you to school?” She laughed again. “Maybe I’m loosening up too much.”

 “I don’t think so. You still won’t let me fight.”

 Gohan laughed but ChiChi didn’t take the joke light-heartedly. Her past behavior would make anyone think that but everyone was wrong. “It’s not as if I never wanted you to learn how to fight, Gohan. Your Dad and his friends thought that but it’s not true.”

 When it came to him fighting, the reaction Gohan mostly saw from his mother was anger. It was mostly directed at his Dad and his friends. Now, Mom appeared conflicted and sad. Emotionally, she was never this raw and open. One thing Gohan noticed from his parents recently was how they sometimes hid their real feelings. Seeing this as a rare opportunity, Gohan used this moment to get answers. “What is the truth?”

 Her son looked so different now. Moments ago, he cried in her arms for comfort like he did at four. Now he looked wise beyond his years; ready for adult conversations. The price of so many fights she assumed. “Seeing your Dad fight Piccolo was traumatic. The brutal beating he took was something I never wanted to happen to you. I told Goku times were peaceful and you didn’t need to learn how to fight. That didn’t mean you couldn’t fight to help others but honestly, I thought if that happened, it wouldn’t be for a very long time. Your Dad was fifteen the first time he saved the world. He wasn’t nine. He wasn’t fighting aliens that could destroy a planet at five years old.”

 At four years old, Gohan accepted his fate. He accepted he had to fight to save the Earth from the Saiyans. He volunteered to go to Namek. He wanted to fight the Artificial Humans. Not since being left alone for six months, did Gohan think he was too young for all this. Cell was the breaking point. The sacrifice in that fight was too much. When Goku was on Yardrat, Gohan trained to keep in shape. He sometimes visited Piccolo for a light session. Since Cell, he hasn’t trained at all. When he visit Piccolo, it’s only to talk. All Gohan wanted to do is read and study. He exercised to stay in shape but he never trained.

 “My other reason,” ChiChi continued, “is that I knew you didn’t want to fight. That was your father’s dream. You told me your dream.”

 “Being a scholar?” Gohan guessed. Gohan remembered telling Piccolo this but he couldn’t remember the day he decided he will be a scholar.

 Luckily, ChiChi did. “Gohan, do you remember when you told me what you wanted to be when you grow up?” Gohan shook his head. “I do. I always wanted you to get an education but you, Gohan, you said you wanted to be a scholar and like any good mother I supported that.”

 “Gohan? Your mother’s here.”

 Gohan turned his head to see his mother standing at the door of his classroom. “Mommy!” Gohan closed his book and ran to ChiChi. He wrapped his arms around her legs.

 ChiChi rubbed his shaggy hair. “Did you have a good day today?” Gohan nodded. “Get your things. We have a long drive home.”

 Gohan grabbed his school hat and bag and bowed before his teacher. Holding ChiChi’s hand, mother and son left preschool. “Where’s Daddy?”

 Most days she and Goku picked up and dropped off Gohan at preschool. “He’s doing work for Mr. Olitz but he’ll be home for dinner.” When they were settled in the truck, ChiChi drove off. Traffic was always congested near the school but once ChiChi drove the route home, traffic always became light. “What did you do in school?”

 “We learned about animals. Miss Rae talked about dinosaurs, lions and tigers. The dinosaurs she talked about aren’t like the ones at home, Mommy.”

 True. The dinosaurs in the Mount Paouz area were friendly and kept to themselves. The ones Miss Rae talked about were the violent and human eating type that scared children.  

 “Mommy, what should I be when I grow up?”

 The unexpected question caused ChiChi to laugh, “Gohan, you’re four. Why are you asking that?”

 “Miss Rae gave us homework. She wants us to think about what we will be when we grow up and draw it.” Gohan shrugged. “I don’t know what to be.”

 ChiChi tried to help. “Well, you want it to be something you love because you will be doing it for a very long time. What do you love to do?”    

 “Play with Daddy.”

 ChiChi laughed. “I do, too, but that’s not a career.”

 “Eat your cooking,” Gohan tried again.

 Another giggle. “That’s not a career.”

 Gohan became quiet as he seriously thought about it. “I love to read.”

 “That’s a start. Let’s see,” ChiChi pondered. What career can be built on reading? “With reading, you can be a writer, a teacher, a scholar…..”

 “What’s a scholar?”

 “A scholar is a very smart person who reads and studies a lot.”

 “I can do that. I’ll be a scholar,” Gohan decided. “I love to read and you and Miss Rae tell me I’m smart.”

 A scholar. ChiChi liked that. It will definitely nourish his mind and ChiChi always wanted to do that. “If that’s what you want to do, Gohan, I’ll help you.”

 Gohan faintly remembered his teacher, Miss Rae. She was kind and helpful to him but like many things, Gohan forgot a lot of his life before the kidnapping. Classmates he ate lunch with, played in the sandbox were completely forgotten. He couldn’t remember their names.

 “Like any good parent, I supported your decision though,” ChiChi sighed, “there was extra motive on my part. I thought it would help me convince your Dad to not train you. I should support your decision like any parent but I should’ve been realistic you will change your mind. You were four years old. I doubt Miss Rae took you seriously.”

 So his desire to be a scholar was based on an assignment from preschool. It was his decision. He chose that career but Mom sounded as if she regretted encouraging him.

“Your Dad and I both made mistakes and in our own ways forced things on you before you were ready to make a decision for yourself. I can change that. All I want is for you to be happy and get an education because I think you deserve that but you don’t have to be a scholar. Be what you want.”

 Was this a trap? Did Mom really mean this? “If I quit school will you be mad?”

 ChiChi raised an eyebrow curiously. Was he testing her? Maybe she and Goku went to the extremes in getting what they wanted out of Gohan but ChiChi wasn’t going to allow Gohan to make the same mistake. “I think you will miss a great opportunity giving up your education. Your Dad and I never had the chances you have, Gohan. Your Dad lived on his own for a very long time and had to figure things out on his own. I had my own tragedies but Grandpa gave me a normal but limited upbringing. While I did get some school lessons, Grandpa thought it would be best if I focus more on being a wife and mother.”

 “Why?”

 “Because of his kingdom. He thought I will inherit it after I married and the only education I need is Grandpa grooming me and Goku but I had my own plans. So, if I didn’t follow in my Dad’s plans for me, I should do the same for you. But Gohan,” ChiChi was firm and vowed to argue if Gohan refused her olive branch, “you have to meet me halfway. I won’t force you but you do need an education.”

 So, it wasn’t a test. This was a lot to think about but Gohan wanted to make one thing clear with his mother. “I never felt forced, Mom but I didn’t think you were right wanting me to study when there were other things happening.”

 “Like bringing back Piccolo?”

 That was a big one. “Yeah, but I was wrong, too. I didn’t think about you missing me for a year. I didn’t know what you went through.”

 ChiChi wrapped an arm around Gohan and squeezed him. “That’s in the past and we have both learned from it.”

 Gohan nodded. There were unfortunate misunderstandings on both their parts and both learned the hard way. “I want to continue my education, Mom. I like reading but maybe scholar isn’t for me.” He laughed. “It’s a broad topic.”

 “Don’t worry, Gohan. You have many peaceful years to decide. You and Goten. Oh,” Something caught her eye. “Someone heard his name.”

 Goten’s little body wiggled as he slowly awakened. He raised his head and looked around searching for someone until he saw ChiChi. A sweet giggle burst from Goten as he crawled to his mother.

 “Is my sweet Goten awake?” ChiChi cooed as she picked up Goten and smothered him with kisses. ChiChi fell back on the blanket with Goten on her chest. “We are lucky, Gohan.”

 “Lucky?”

 “We lost Goku but we get to live in peace. In another future, you and your father are dead.” She lift Goten over her. The child burst in sweet giggles as he went up and down in his mother’s arms. “Goten never existed. I don’t know what happened to me but I know it wasn’t good. The me in that time won’t have a happy ending. We get to have a happy ending, Gohan. You will grow up, find a career, marry and have children. Goten will grow up in peace. He won’t have to deal with kidnappings and violence. I won’t have Goku but I will have you, Goten and any grandchildren you’ll give me. I’ll be happy.”

 His mother was so happy as she flew Goten in her arms. Goten’s laughs were pure and joyous like all happy babies. It made Gohan very happy to see this. Mom was right. They will have a happier future. Dad was gone but for the first time in a year Gohan wasn’t heavily burdened with guilt. He and Mom had a long overdue talk and Gohan felt a change in their relationship. It was a good change. Gohan accepted he will always carry some guilt but it felt lighter now. They were lucky. Dad was gone but Goten is here. He’ll have a better future than his dead counterpart. He won’t die at a young age in a dystopian future. He’ll have his father’s friends and new friends he’ll make in the future.

 I’ll be happy, Gohan decided. I’ll be happy.

 ****

 ChiChi felt the summer heat when she stepped out of her father’s car. The heat was somewhat bearable in her mountain home. It was brutal in West City. The city was going through a record-breaking heatwave.

 Dr. Briefs invented an invisible dome for the gathering in his backyard. The heat was brutal from where Gyu-Mao parked to the short distance inside the large Capsule Corporation domicile. ChiChi picked up her pace as she was eager to get her and Goten inside.  

 “Oooo,” ChiChi felt the relief of chilled air, “that cool air feels wonderful.”

 “I still want a drink,” Gyu-Mao, with his massive frame, felt the heat more than his family. He wiped the sweat off his forehead. “A nice cold beer sounds good.”

 “Wow,” Gohan marveled at the booms of music overhead and the transformation of the Briefs’ backyard into a carnival. There were several booths managed by robots that prepared a variety of foods, an area cornered off for video and carnival games for all to play. It reminded ChiChi of the festivals her father hosted in his village. A few of Dr. Briefs pets roamed free in a fenced area. ChiChi thought that will be a fun spot to play with Goten. At almost nine months, Goten walked, was fearless and enthusiastic playing with wild animals while Gohan was shy around them at his age.

 “You made it!”

 Bulma spotted them as she and Trunks were by a food booth of sweet cakes. Bulma waved them over.

 “Drink,” Gyu-Mao said parched. “It’s so hot outside.”

 Bulma pointed to three booths down from them. “Makes everything. Alcoholic. Nonalcoholic.”

 While Gyu-Mao sauntered over to the drink booth, ChiChi and Gohan remained. ChiChi carried Goten in his carrier while Gohan carried Goten’s baby bag. “Sorry we’re late,” ChiChi apologized. “Goten was a little fussy before we left but he settled on the drive here.”

 “At least you came.” Bulma was irritated. “Not everyone showed up. Piccolo refused to come and Tien wasn’t kidding when he told Yamcha after the Cell Game this may be the last time we see him.”

 ChiChi tried to be optimistic. “Well, more fun for us I guess.”

 “Visit all the booths,” Bulma told them. “I have plenty of food and games. The interactive ones are great, Gohan. I highly recommend them.”

 “I don’t know how to play those games,” Gohan admitted shyly.

 “Yamcha will show you. ChiChi, I have a Goldfish, UNO and Old Maid for you. I’ll play with you but after I have my rematch with Master Roshi over Poker. He swindled two grand out of me. I’m getting it back today.”

 ChiChi suspected Bulma meant well referring child games to her as Goku’s friends didn’t see her as the adult games type of player but it would’ve been nice to be asked what and if she played  but like everyone always suspected Goku was too innocent to know anything, they thought that of her as well. Like Goku, she will use this to her advantage. “I wouldn’t mind sitting in on a Poker game.”

 Bulma was taken back at the suggestion. “If you want but Master Roshi is really good and plays for money. I’ll explain the game and after watching me and Master Roshi play a round or two, join in if you feel comfortable.”

 “Master Roshi wouldn’t take money from me.” If he tried, ChiChi would make him pay. “It would be cruel to take money from his former student’s widow.”

 “We always play for money but Roshi only takes it from me.” It shouldn’t matter to Bulma since she is rich and the two grand Master Roshi won from her was pocket change but it was the principle that old man outplayed a genius like her that infuriated her.

 “Oh, Trunks,” Bulma groaned at Trunks’ cake smeared face. “You’re such a messy eater.” She grabbed a napkin and wiped his face clean.

 There was a sudden chorus of roars at one of the video game consoles. Yamcha threw his hands up with Oolong, Puar and a woman ChiChi never saw before cheering him. She was a brunette with her hair pulled up into a ponytail. She wore a pretty summer dress that flattered her petite figure and stood very close to Yamcha. “They are really into the games,” ChiChi commented.

 “They’ve been playing since they got here. Oh,” Bulma smiled cheekily. “Yamcha brought his girlfriend. Not as pretty as me, but not many women are. He met her at one of his baseball games.”

 Trunks got fussy when Bulma pulled him away from the booth of sweets. She settled the child in her arms as she walked with ChiChi, Goten and Gohan. “I’m more interested in Krillin’s girlfriend.”

 “Why?”

 “They’ve been dating for over a year and Krillin’s so secretive about it. That’s suspicious.”

 ChiChi agreed it did sound suspicious but Krillin’s life was his personal business. “Maybe he wasn’t ready to tell us about her.”

 “And that makes it suspicious. Why hasn’t Krillin told us about her? What’s he hiding?” It was all an exciting mystery to Bulma.

 “Maybe he’s scared of what we will think,” Gohan offered his opinion. “Vegeta was upset with him not destroying 18 after the fight with Cell and…..” Gohan recalled the embarrassing thing he said on Kami’s Temple. “I accidentally announced Krillin’s feelings to 18.”

 “Whoever she is, we can be relieved it’s not 18.”

 Bulma brought them to the picnic area where her mother laid on a blanket wearing sunglasses, a crop shirt and mini shorts. A few feet away at the tables sat Vegeta surrounded by food.  

 “Let’s sit on the grass,” ChiChi pointed to a spot near Mrs. Briefs.  

 Gohan grabbed a picnic blanket off a spare table and spread it out. Goten woke up in the middle of this and his curious eyes looked around. ChiChi spotted that look in Goten’s eyes. She had ten seconds before Goten broke out in a full-blown wail. ChiChi unbuckled the carrier and pulled Goten out just in time.

 “What’s wrong with Goten?” Bulma asked curiously of Goten clinging to ChiChi.

 ChiChi rocked Goten gently. “Goten has to be held when he wakes up from his naps or he’s gonna scream.”

 “And fed.” Gohan opened Goten’s baby bag and handed ChiChi a bottle of milk.  

 Trunks walked over to Gohan as he pulled toys, snacks and bottles from Goten’s baby bag. Trunks grabbed a plush dragon and sat on the blanket to play with it. Seeing Trunks got himself a temporary babysitter with Gohan and ChiChi, Bulma said, “Mind watching him while I grab something to eat? I’m starving.”

 Before ChiChi could answer, Bulma was already walking away. “Mine!” Goten jumped out of ChiChi’s arms when he saw Trunks playing with his toy. Trunks stuck his tongue out at Goten and held the plush dragon close to him.

 “Let him play with it, Goten.” ChiChi grabbed a toy from the bag and gave it to her son. “When Bulma visited us, she let you play with Trunks’ toys.”

 “He broke it!” Trunks pointed at Goten.

 Goten tried to reach for the toy again but ChiChi held him back. “Oh, my,” Mrs. Briefs cooed seeing Goten. Today was the first time she met him. “He looks like Goku.”

 ChiChi tickled Goten to distract him from getting his plush dragon from Trunks. The baby squirmed and laughed, completely forgetting about his toy. “He looks and smiles so much like his Daddy. It’s almost as if he’s returned in some way.”

 Vegeta rolled his eyes. If she continued on like this, he will throw up his food. “Kakarrot’s isn’t coming back and you need to get over that. There isn’t any special meaning to Goten looking like Kakarrot. The second sons of a Saiyan look like their father.”

ChiChi and Gohan looked at Goten before turning to Vegeta surprised by this revelation. “Really?”

 “Saiyan genetics,” Vegeta explained. “Even that idiot Raditz knew. He knew he will recognize Kakarrot because he looked like their father.”

 That sounded familiar to ChiChi. “When he was in the hospital, Goku did mention his brother saying that.”

 Vegeta resumed eating when he noticed ChiChi staring at him in a peculiar way. “What are you looking at me for?”

 “I’m wondering if you are the oldest or second son of your father.”

 Vegeta turned away from ChiChi. It was bad enough Bulma asked about his past. He didn’t need ChiChi doing it, too. “Mind your own business!”

 “Krillin!” Bulma screamed. “What the hell?!”

 Alarmed, ChiChi, Gohan and Vegeta looked to see what happened. Master Roshi, Krillin and Krillin’s girlfriend, 18, arrived.

 18 dressed relaxed in her black skinny jeans and plum-colored halter top. The bracelets on her right arm jingled as she pushed back a lock of blonde hair behind her ear. Her sharp, pretty blue eyes surveyed the shock and suspicious stares at her as she arrived on Krillin’s arm. Krillin rubbed the back of his head nervously. “Hi, everyone! Nice group get together you arranged, Bulma.” Several pairs of eyes stared wanting an explanation. “We all know each other but I’ll introduce her again. Meet 18…. my girlfriend.”

 Yamcha pushed his girlfriend behind him. Oolong and Puar dived behind a game console.

 Gyu-Mao dropped his drink while Master Roshi ordered himself one.  

 Dr. Briefs resumed playing with his pets while Mrs. Briefs clapped her hands giddily. “Ooooh, we have another blonde in the group!”

 Bulma gripped her plate irate at Krillin. “Well, I see why you kept this a secret.”

 Gohan was the only one happy. He was relieved he didn’t blow Krillin’s chance with 18. “Krillin got her to be his girlfriend after all! That’s great!”

 A vein popped on Vegeta’s forehead as the metal can of cool drink crushed in his hand. “What the fucking hell?!” Vegeta rose. His hair turned blonde and with one leap stood beside Bulma. He wanted answers. “What the hell is this?!”

 “Listen, Vegeta.” Krillin tried to explain. “I know you don’t like 18 but it’s been over a year since she kicked your ass and she’s not a killer. She’s not a bad person.”

 “The hell she isn’t! She’s one of Dr. Gero’s monstrous creations. Have you forgotten what hell she unleashed on us a year ago?!”

 “It wasn’t that bad. She’s not like the ones Trunks fought in his time.”

 Not that bad? She broke his arm!! She humiliated him, the Prince of Saiyans! “You would say that. Your cowardly ass stayed behind while the rest of had the guts to face her and her tin can brother.” 18’s pretty blue eyes thinned at the insult. “Oh, does the tin can have feelings?” Vegeta mocked. “Did I hurt you telling you the truth about yourself?”

 “Look,” Krillin warned him. He expected hostility but Krillin wanted it directed at him. Not 18. “Everyone can change. You did worse than 18 and we forgave you. Bulma had a baby with you even though you are responsible for her ex getting killed.”

 Yamcha whistled. “I knew someone would say it but I didn’t think it would be him.”

 “Seriously?!” Bulma screamed. “You bring that up after you couldn’t destroy the remote that would’ve saved your best friend’s life?!”

 Here we go again. Gohan slapped his forehead. When will this stop? “Pack Goten’s things,” ChiChi told Gohan. “If they start fighting, I want you to get Goten away from here.”

 “Don’t worry, Mom.” Gohan felt the escalation, too. “It won’t come to that.”

 “I don’t care if you stay or go,” Vegeta raged at Krillin, “but I don’t want that robot in my house!”

 “It’s not your house,” Krillin refused to leave. “And 18’s not a robot.”

 “Well, I don’t want her in my house.” Bulma pointed behind Krillin. “Get out!”

 If only they didn’t insult 18. “It’s not your house either,” Krillin shot back in a smartass tone. “It’s your Dad’s house.”

 Bulma flinched at Krillin’s sharp tongue. Where did this behavior come from? All she had to do is scream and Krillin would cower but now he stood in front of 18 defiantly.

 Dr. Briefs lit up a cigarette amused. “Oh, let them stay, Bulma. He’s right. Vegeta’s has done worse.”

 “Why are you taking Krillin’s side?!” Bulma yelled. “I’m your daughter!”

 Krillin standing in front of 18 humored Vegeta. “You’ve gained a lot of confidence.” And he knew why. “You fuck that robot.” He laughed cruelly. “I guess if you’re desperate you’ll fuck anything.”

 18’s sharp eyes smoldered. She didn’t care what Vegeta said to her, but he crossed a line going after 17 or Krillin. “I do regret things I did but when I think of you, Vegeta, I have no regrets.” She stepped closer to him where her breath fanned his face. “You still talk too much.” Even though she invaded his personal space, he didn’t move as 18 circled him. “Sometimes I think of you. I think of the look on your face before I slapped you into a mountain. I think of you when I broke your arm. I smile and think, ‘That’s one good thing I did right. What would it be like to do it again?’”

 “YOU WANT A REMATCH?!” Vegeta’s body illuminated as his rising Ki created trembles and hurricane force winds in the backyard. Bulma was knocked back several feet. Yamcha pulled his girlfriend behind a game console. Gyu-Mao and Master Roshi shielded themselves behind the liquor booth. Trunks moved closer to ChiChi. As the ground shook, debris from booths flung over the yard, game consoles began sliding from their spot. Some even tipped over. A blonde Gohan stood protectively in front of his mother and brother. He shielded them with his power as he waited for the moment he will have to step in.

 Vegeta’s body pulsed with energy. He wasn’t at half his power but it was enough to deal with 18. “TAKE THIS!” Vegeta roared as he threw the first punch. His fist barely moved forward when Gohan caught his wrist. Vegeta raised his Ki but the ten-year-old was still too strong for him. “Get your damn hands off me!”

 “You’re causing a lot of damage, Vegeta!”

 “Me?!” Vegeta tried to move but Gohan restrained him. “She caused this!”

 “You’re instigating a fight!” Gohan thought yelling would get through Vegeta. “You’re causing damage and scaring everyone!”

 Vegeta looked around at knocked over game consoles and blown over booths. Bulma climbed out of one blown several feet away. There were dazed robots and everyone staring at Vegeta as if he was the one wrong. “Fuck off!”

 “It’s not Vegeta’s fault.” Bulma returned to Vegeta’s side and pointed at Krillin and 18. “They started it. Krillin deliberately kept this a secret!”

 “There wasn’t a right time to mention I’m dating 18,” Krillin tried to explain. “ChiChi was pregnant when we last saw each other.”

 “You still could’ve told the rest of us. We could’ve kept it quiet from ChiChi like we used to do.” Bulma spotted Master Roshi by the liquor booth. “Same for you, Old Man! You knew and said nothing!”

 “That’s enough of that.” Dr. Briefs joined the group. “As long as everyone behaves, there’s no reason we all can’t get along and enjoy this party.”

 Dr. Briefs wasn’t a physically strong man. He had a very relaxed personality and let his family and Vegeta do what they want and accommodated them if he can. So when he kindly put his foot down, no one argued against him. Not even Vegeta.

 “If she makes one move, she’s dead,” Vegeta threatened. He returned to base form where Gohan still held him. Vegeta snatched his arm away from Gohan. “Get your hands off me!”

 Vegeta stormed off to his table but Bulma remained. She had a few more words for Krillin and 18. “Where’s your brother? Should I expect him to crash the party and kill us?”

 18 flipped her hair. “My brother has no plans of coming here.”

 Bulma didn’t believe 18 and she looked at Krillin as if she didn’t know him. “Thanks for ruining the party, Krillin.”

 Bulma left to catch up with Vegeta. While the most hostile group walked away, the eyes of everyone else weren’t welcoming except for Gohan and Master Roshi who knew the secret.

 “Come sit with us, Krillin,” Gohan offered.

 “With your Mom?!” Krillin reacted with fear. “If Bulma wanted to tear my head off, ChiChi will kill me.”

 “It’s not a good move anyway,” 18 observed Bulma sitting on the blanket with ChiChi.

 Krillin saw it and groaned. He imagined the two teaming up against him later. ChiChi may literally throw him out! This reunion was spiraling into a disaster. “18, how about we go somewhere else?”

 “No.” 18 refused to run. “We didn’t do anything wrong. They need to get used to seeing us.” Headstrong she was, 18 was sympathetic to Krillin’s plight. “But I know you have to talk to your friends. You can do that better without me.”

 Without another word, 18 left his side. Walking alone, 18 saw Yamcha, a woman, Oolong and Puar stare at her with fear. When she arrived in the picnic area, Mrs. Briefs waved while Vegeta scowled while stuffing his mouth with food. Bulma clutched Trunks as if protecting her from 18. 18 mentally scoffed. Bulma really thought she will kill her child? 18 spotted the other woman she knew to be Son Goku’s widow. She held her child, too, but she didn’t look at 18 with fear. 18 didn’t bother deciphering her look as she sat at the farthest table with her back to everyone.

 Lapis told you but you didn’t listen. 18 cursed herself as she recalled her conversation with her brother.

 “You’re crazy, Lazuli.” 17 told her. “Absolutely crazy. They are not gonna accept you. All they will see is what we did after we were freed and what they think of us because of Trunks.”

 18 casually sat in her chair with her legs crossed and hands behind her head. She asked Krillin when he will introduce her to his friends. Krillin always said the time wasn’t right and each time 18 gave him the cold shoulder. Now on the verge of meeting his friends, 18 had second doubts.

 “I’m not doing it to be accepted.”

 “I’m your brother. I know when you’re lying. You act all cool and unaffected but you want to be accepted. You want to show you are different and not what they think.” 17 sat on the railing of his porch. “I don’t know what you see in Krillin but you want to be welcome in that circle.”

 “After everything that’s happened to us, I deserve something good and that’s Krillin.”

 17 rolled his eyes. “If you say so but those friends of his won’t accept you. Vegeta’s doesn’t strike me as the forgiving type and from what Krillin told you, Vegeta’s a lot stronger now. I won’t be able to help you if he wants a rematch.”

 “Krillin and I can handle him.”

 “Hmph,” 17 snorted.

 “What about you, Lapis?” 18 questioned. “Don’t you want something different? Do you enjoy living in the middle of nowhere? Alone?”

 17 laughed. “What’s wrong with this?” He stretched his arms out at the cabin they were in. “It’s quiet, away from civilization. As for alone,” he grinned, “not always. You’re just not a nature girl.”

 “You weren’t exactly an outdoorsman either,” 18 reminded him. “16’s death affected you more than you want to let on.” Krillin told 18 about 16’s sacrifice and how his death changed the course of the Cell Game. She thought of how 16 tried to save her before Cell absorbed her. 17 never saw any of this but he took 16’s death harder than she.

 “What are your plans with Krillin, Lazuli?” 17 changed the subject. 18 noticed her brother did that lot whenever 16 was mentioned. “What are you trying to do with him? Are you looking for marriage? A family? Can you even have kids?”

 “You know there are still parts of me that’s human. Just like you.”

 “Hmm. Dr. Gero certainly made sure of that,” 17 said cuttingly. The horrors of what Dr. Gero did to them will never be forgotten. Brother and sister handled it in their own way. 17 engaged in petty robberies and entertaining female company. 18 dealt with the trauma by focusing on happier things. Her and Krillin. “How much does Krillin know what Dr. Gero did to us? Does he even know your name?”

 “Krillin knows enough.”

 “If he doesn’t protect you at this gathering, I’m including Krillin in my revenge.”

 Krillin doesn’t have to worry about my brother but what do I do now? 18 asked herself as she sat alone. She could hear Krillin laughing with his friends. At least someone is enjoying themselves.

 After the disturbance of Krillin and 18’s arrival, the reunion happily resumed. Game consoles, food and liquor booths were occupied again. Mrs. Brief relaxed on her blanket. Dr. Briefs played with his animals. Krillin chatted with Yamcha and Gohan and received some light teasing from Oolong.

 The mood was subdued in the picnic area. Vegeta watched 18 like a hawk. Bulma and ChiChi stared at 18 curiously, too, while they cared for their children.

 “The nerve of Krillin inviting 18 and not telling us he’s dating her,” Bulma grumbled. “There’s no way she’s into him. She’s using him to get close to us.”

 ChiChi cut the food on Goten’s plate into smaller bites. “I don’t agree with Krillin keeping this secret. I don’t like secrets.” Goten didn’t wait for ChiChi to put his food on a fork. He grabbed the food and stuffed it in his mouth. “Oh, Goten,” ChiChi wiped Goten’s messy face. “I know what it’s like to be left out on things but you were hypocritical yelling at Krillin.”

 “Hypocritical?” Bulma felt she was right. “18 almost killed Vegeta. She and her brother hunted down Goku. You should be mad and on my side.”

 “I’m not picking sides but everyone forgave Piccolo and I was looked at as the bad person because I didn’t when he kidnapped my son for a year. I wasn’t understanding to let my five-year-old son who was just reunited with me after a year apart to go into space. You and Krillin said it will be a safe trip because the Namekians are peaceful but no one took into consideration that being a safe trip meant my son didn’t need to go. In spite of how you treated me, I forgave all of you.”

 Bulma winced at the emotional slap of words. She still held a grudge about that. “It wasn’t like that, ChiChi. We did think it was a safe trip and we didn’t see the harm in Gohan going.”

 “Because he wasn’t your child,” ChiChi steered Bulma to understand her view. “If it were Trunks, you wouldn’t have let him go.”

 “Zoom!” Trunks flew a toy car in the air like an air ship.

 Trunks was so happy playing with Goten’s toys. Bulma would’ve argued against Trunks going off into space at five years old. However, Bulma felt she had some wiggle room to argue her side. “I wouldn’t but Gohan is Goku’s son. Maybe subconsciously, we did think we need Gohan just in case our trip wasn’t peaceful and we were right. We did need him. Anyway,” Bulma wanted to stay on topic, “it doesn’t excuse what Krillin did.”

 “Vegeta did a lot worst.” ChiChi didn’t understand Bulma’s blindness to that. It was starting to aggravate her. “I’ve noticed forgiveness is very quick with you all as long as it doesn’t affect you. When it does, your behavior isn’t different than mine when it only affected me.”

 ChiChi could feel her temper bubbling. The hypocrisy! Playing victim. Will it ever end? ChiChi wanted to get on better terms with Goku’s friends but sometimes they made it so difficult. Instead of lashing out, she picked up Goten and walked off. She needed to cool off or she will be screaming like everyone expected of her.

 ChiChi passed booths of food and games. Her father was drunk and sharing stories with Master Roshi she wouldn’t subject her innocent child of hearing. Yamcha and Krillin stood over Gohan, showing him how to play a game.  She had Goten but ChiChi felt lonely.  

 When it was just us, Goku was always by my side. At the festivals at my Dad’s village or when we went to different cities, Goku was with me. Would it be the same if we were with his friends?

 ChiChi distracted herself by taking Goten to the petting zoo of Dr. Briefs’ animals. While Goten played with the animals, ChiChi talked with Dr. Briefs. The patriarch was kind, very chill and seem more interested in his animals and keeping the peace than socializing.

 After feeding and playing with each animal, Goten and ChiChi left the petting zoo. Krillin and Gohan were playing against each other in an interactive game with Oolong and Puar cheering them on. Yamcha and his girlfriend were sharing a meal at a food booth. Bulma played with Trunks with her Mom. Vegeta kept eating and watching 18 who sat alone.

 She and Goten were at the petting zoo for an hour. In all this time, ChiChi wondered, did anyone approach 18?

 Isolation from Goku’s friends. ChiChi knew what that was like. Until last year, she felt very isolated from them. She was wife to the friend they loved so much; the mother of his children but for years she wasn’t accepted. She was judged, didn’t fit in and ChiChi saw history repeating itself with 18.

 ChiChi decided to change that.

 18 looked at her watch. This is boring. She drummed her fingers against the table. 18 thought Krillin should speak with his friends to explain things but she thought he would’ve returned. He was gone for over an hour talking and playing those games. He should catch up with his friends since he hasn’t spent time with them in months but I’m important, too.

 18 contemplated going to Krillin when she felt someone near. She turned, saw ChiChi and Goten and looked away. 18 only knew what Krillin told her about ChiChi. Great. Another volatile greeting.

 “I guess this isn’t the welcome you wanted.”

 That wasn’t a yell. ChiChi sounded sympathetic. Was this a trick? 18 studied ChiChi for a moment before turning away again. “Aren’t you afraid I will kill you and your child?”

 “If you wanted to, you would’ve tried and failed already.” ChiChi sat next to 18 which caused the blonde to turn back with skeptical eyes. What was she up to? “I know what it’s like being the new person in this group. No one knows you. No one understands you. No one wants to be your friend or give you a chance.”

 Goten reached to grab 18 but ChiChi adjusted Goten in her lap. “I was Goku’s wife for ten years. I wasn’t accepted by his friends until he died last year.”

 If 18 was surprised, she didn’t reveal it. “They are an interesting bunch. In some ways, I see why Goku called them friends and enjoyed adventures with them but I also see why he could go years without seeing them.”

 Goten reached forward and touch 18’s bracelets. He gripped on it and pulled. “Sorry,” ChiChi apologized pulling Goten’s fingers away from 18’s bracelet. “Goten’s at that grabby stage.”

 Goten reached for 18’s bracelet again and whimpered when ChiChi pulled him away. “No,” he whined.

 “It’s okay.” 18 extended her hand so Goten can touch her bracelets. “Not that I care what anyone thinks but are you saying I have to wait ten years before everyone stops looking at me as if I will kill them?”

 “I think ten years will only be for me. They’ve matured some so you’ll never go through what I went through with them.”

 Krillin only shared ChiChi being Goku’s wife with a bad temper who hated all of them. He mostly talked about Goku, Gohan, Yamcha and sometimes Bulma. What Krillin told her about ChiChi and what she saw was different. “I know you don’t get along with them. What did Krillin do?”

 “I’m not gonna badmouth your boyfriend to you,” ChiChi wasn’t falling for that trap. “There were things I wished was handled better but Krillin has to tell you.”

 “You could tell me.”

 ChiChi shook her head too smart for that. “I could but if I talk badly about your boyfriend, would you believe me or defend him?”

 18 removed one of her bracelets and handed it to Goten. “You don’t think I’m open minded to hear both sides?”

 Goten gripped the bracelet in his tiny hands. ChiChi and 18 were humored with Goten’s fascination of it. “I think you should question why Krillin told you one side and not the whole story.” ChiChi groaned when Goten bit the jewelry. “Goten,” she scolded her son while pulling the bracelet from his mouth.

 18 thought over what ChiChi said. Krillin said ChiChi hated all of them and she has a bad temper. When 18 pried for more information, Krillin mentioned the remote incident and 18 accepted that was the reason but now she felt there was more to this hate. “So, this isn’t over just the remote?”

 ChiChi shook her head wryly. “Talk to him.”

 18 decided she will. Krillin will tell her everything or else. She smiled suddenly not feeling bored anymore.

 “Did you enjoy my dress?”

 18’s eyebrows wrinkled at ChiChi’s question. “What dress?”

 “When Goku, Gohan and I returned home, our home was a mess. I noticed one of my dresses missing.” ChiChi bounced Goten in her lap. “I was angry at first but I got over it. I have plenty of dresses even though I really did like that one.”

 Oh. That dress. 18 remembered holding the dress in front of a mirror in Son Goku’s home. The rose qipao dress was very pretty and with it being her size 18 couldn’t resist taking it. “You have a closet full of clothes. I didn’t think you’d noticed one missing. Besides, I was locked up in Dr. Gero’s lab. I deserve a new wardrobe.”

 ChiChi knew nothing about 17 and 18’s experience with Dr. Gero but knowing what a psycho he was with his desire to seek revenge on her husband, she suspected it wasn’t a great experience. “Dr. Gero sounds like a monster. It couldn’t be comforting living with him. I guess you are staying with Krillin and Master Roshi.” 18 didn’t answer but ChiChi suspected it’s true. “Master Roshi is an upgrade over Dr. Gero but Krillin owes you a new wardrobe having you live there with that lecher and not in a place of your own.”

 This time 18 lips turned up in a sly smile. 18 got the vibe Krillin wasn’t a big fan of ChiChi but 18 decided, she liked her.

 ****

 18 found herself alone again when ChiChi joined Bulma and Master Roshi in a game of Poker. Gohan sat next to ChiChi with Goten in his lap. While the sons cheered on their Mom, 18 watched from afar knowing she wouldn’t be welcomed.

 Krillin sat in the spot once occupied by ChiChi. He sipped his beer as he watched the game. “How did you get a Full House?” Bulma screamed as ChiChi showed her winning hand.

 “I didn’t know ChiChi played Poker,” Krillin sipped his beer as ChiChi celebrated with her sons. “She doesn’t seem like the type to know how.” While he played games with his friends, he saw ChiChi talking to 18. He didn’t hear any screaming from ChiChi. He hoped it meant they got along but he needed to be sure. “How did it go with ChiChi?”

 “She wasn’t what you warned me about.”

 Krillin was relieved to hear that. “That’s good. She doesn’t like me and I never expected her to talk to you without screaming you tried to kill Goku.”

 Krillin warned her but after talking to ChiChi, 18 felt she didn’t get the full story from Krillin. “What did Bulma mean when she said, ‘We could’ve kept it quiet from ChiChi like we used to do’? It didn’t sound like Bulma was only talking about the remote.”

 Oh, boy. Bulma and her big mouth. He thought 18 forgot about that but she was too sharp, observant and her suspicious eyes told him she wasn’t letting this go. He had to tell her the truth. “When Goku died the first time, we didn’t let ChiChi know he was dead or Gohan was taken by Piccolo.”

 “For how long?” Krillin told her this story but a loose version of it. Goku died saving his son and Piccolo trained Gohan to prepare for the fight against Vegeta and Nappa. The details were always glossed over. He never mentioned ChiChi.

 “A day.” Six years later and it still sounded bad. “ChiChi came to Master Roshi’s island wanting to know where they were.”

 “Taken?” 18 repeated. “As in kidnapped?”

 “Taken is a nicer word.”

 A nicer word? 18 gazed at Gohan. He was ten now but when this happened, he was so much younger. Knowing Gohan was a very young child kidnapped triggered her own painful memories with Dr. Gero. No wonder ChiChi didn’t like them! “So, you let ChiChi wander all night where her husband and son were? She had to go to you to find out what happened to her family?”

 18 was upset. Krillin knew it and will pay for it later. “Yeah, and ChiChi wasn’t told what was really happening on Namek.” Krillin decided to get it all out in the open. Sooner or later, 18 will find out. “She thought Goku and Gohan were playing around but that part wasn’t my fault. That was Bulma’s.”

 With the way Bulma greeted her, 18 didn’t find this surprising. All this gave 18 a deeper perception of ChiChi. “She’s generous.”

 “Generous? Who?”

 “ChiChi. If you knew my brother was dead for a day and let me confront you instead of telling me immediately, I would’ve killed you.” 18 said it so casually but Krillin knew it was a threat and something she will do if he ever did this to her. 18 pushed back a lock of her blonde hair as she turned her attention back on the Poker game. “ChiChi invited me to visit her. I think I’ll do that.”

 Krillin nodded okay as he drunk his beer. Lazuli and ChiChi talking and becoming friends? I don’t know if this is a good thing for them or a bad thing for me.

 At the Poker table, ChiChi, Bulma and Master Roshi had an audience. It grew from Gohan and Goten to Bulma’s parents, Gyu-Mao, Yamcha and his girlfriend, Oolong and Puar. Vegeta remained far away as usual. Hearing Master Roshi and Bulma curse at their losses to ChiChi had them intrigued. Two of the games ChiChi bluffed to victory which infuriated her opponents they were fooled by someone they considered very emotional and easy to read.

 Master Roshi pushed in his remaining chips. “I’m ready.” Older with more skills, Master Roshi didn’t like losing. Two of the game losses, he did blame himself looking at Bulma’s breasts in her tight shirt with poking nipples and ChiChi’s fuller breasts. This time he had the hot hand.

 “Already?!” Bulma nearly screeched. Last time ChiChi bluffed her way to victory. Now Master Roshi was doing it. Bulma looked at her cards. It was a good hand. No. It was a winning hand. She pushed in her chips. “I’m in.”

 All eyes were on ChiChi. “Well, I wasn’t ready,” she grumbled irritated, “but I guess I don’t have a choice.”

 ChiChi’s frustration made Master Roshi gleefully cackle. This was the first time ChiChi showed anger in a game. That meant she knew she lost and he won! He flipped his cards. “Beat this!” Jack, ten and a pair of nines.

 Bulma cackled victoriously. She had this one! “Gotcha, Old Man! Two pairs of tens and nines! Whoo!” She stood up to dance. “You owe me and I’m not letting you off the hook because I’m rich!”

 “But Bulma,” Gohan interrupted Bulma’s victory dance. “Mom hasn’t revealed her hand.”

 So busy celebrating Bulma forgot about ChiChi but from her sour expression, it was obvious ChiChi lost.  “Sorry. I celebrated too soon. I’ll celebrate after you show your hand.”

 ChiChi looked at her cards and sighed. “We were playing for real money?” ChiChi asked again. “I owe you?”

 “No,” Bulma laughed. She would never make ChiChi pay. Gloating was payment for Bulma. “I won’t make you pay, ChiChi. If you won, I would pay you. A few thousand zeni is nothing to me but since you didn’t win and I did.....”

 ChiChi placed her cards down. “But I thought two pairs of Kings and nines are higher than two pairs of tens and nines.”

 Everyone leaned over to read ChiChi’s cards. Gohan picked up a little of the game watching ChiChi. He didn’t understand everything but he did know his mother’s hand were the best ones. “Mom, you won!!”

 Goten clapped and giggled. “Momma won! Momma won!”

 Bulma dropped in her seat. “What the hell?” She studied her and ChiChi’s cards. ChiChi’s cards were higher but Bulma was still in denial. “But I won.”

 Yamcha laughed. He took more pleasure than others in Bulma getting a loss. He patted her shoulder. “Oh, too bad, Bulma.” Bulma’s icy glare made Yamcha flinch and clamp his hands over his mouth.

 “Does that mean I really win?” ChiChi wanted to be sure. “I win four thousand zeni?”

 Bulma rolled her eyes sourly. She gave her word. “I guess so, but how are you so good at Poker? You learned how to play today.”

 ChiChi couldn’t resist smirking at her victory. “You assumed I didn’t know and volunteered to teach me. Goku told me he likes letting you all think what you want about him. I decided to do the same.” ChiChi clapped gleefully. “I can’t believe I won! This money will come in handy. I can buy that computer for you, Gohan, get new clothes for everyone…..”

 As ChiChi gushed over what she will spend her money on and receive congratulations from everyone even Master Roshi, Bulma’s temper cooled. It still bothered her she was conned but it was funny and gave more insight into ChiChi. The woman was a guarded fortress. Bulma couldn’t get anything out of her but seeing another layer removed, seeing another lighthearted side of ChiChi had Bulma thinking the loops she was going through to be friends with ChiChi was worth it.

 ****

 As time passed in the afterlife, Goku grew less like a visitor and more as someone comfortable in his new home. Like King Kai said there were so many people to talk and learn from. Goku felt more comfortable with the warriors at Grand Kai’s home and spent less time in the land of only the good people. Even his visits to Grandpa Gohan lessen.  

 Being among the fighters kept Goku busy. He was a sponge, studying and learning anything beneficial from other fighters. Most times he spent alone pushing himself further. Gohan inspired him to go beyond a Super Saiyan. In death, he was free from the limits of a mortal body and vowed to reach Gohan’s level.

 King Kai observed Goku as he sparred in the air with a fighter from the West Kai quadrant. Fighters from the west were notoriously strong and the only fighters besides the ones in the North quadrant to give Goku a challenge.

 Fighting was common in this place and no one batted an eye when warriors spar but when Goku fought, others took notice or held onto something since Goku’s fights usually cause quakes.  

 It was these tremors that irritated East Kai’s arrival with her newest fighter.

 “Does this land always suffer from tremors?” the warrior elevated over the ground while East Kai struggled to stay upright on her scooter.

 “No,” East Kai wobbled on her scooter. “This is Son Goku. He’s fighting someone again. There are other places on the planet he can go fight without rattling the planet but that jerk Kai of the North wants to show off his best student.”

 The fighter reach out to feel the Ki. Both were very strong but one succeeded the other. As East Kai and her fighter strolled the area, other warriors took notice of the new fighter. One stared while walking into a wall. Another nearly dropped one of his heavy weights. The East Kai fighter ignored the attention but East Kai cackled. “I knew you will make a splash here. If you impress by your looks imagine the reaction when they see your skills, Kimani.”

 Kimani was very aware of her beauty. Her lithe, muscular frame, sleek black hair and cerulean eyes garnered attention but she thought in the afterlife in a land among warriors, her beauty wouldn’t be as captivating as her skills as a fighter.

 “I thought it would be different here, but as long as there are fighters I can learn and develop from, I’ll be happy.”

 “There are plenty of them here,” East Kai guaranteed. “As much as I hate to say, your best challengers will be fighters from the North and West quadrant. You are a rare breed from my quadrant. My fighters are known for speed but you are on another level with your strength and skills. Your speed gives you a great advantage.”

 When East Kai and Kimani reached the courtyard of the palace, the tremors resumed again. This time East Kai fell off her scooter. Kimani kept her balance but the source of the tremors caught her eyes. Two fighters, one East Kai called Goku were engaged in an intense battle. Their punches in the sky clapped like boisterous thunder. They were both very good Kimani observed. The way they moved their bodies, blocking and striking each other were of individuals with years of battle experience.

 “I can’t see them!” Kimani heard a fighter say. They couldn’t see but Kimani did.

 The stronger fighter Kimani guessed as Goku expelled a bright sphere of Ki from his body. His opponent deflected the attack with a punch that shattered the sphere in a massive explosion. Meteors of Ki rained on everyone below. Fighters scattered, ducking for cover and dodging the raining Ki. One hit the ground not far from Kimani and created a foot-deep crater. More rained in her direction and Kimani sliced the raining Ki meteors away from her and East Kai with her knifehand strike. Through it all Goku and his opponent didn’t miss a step in their fighting.

 Impressive there are fighters like these in the afterlife. Kimani smiled as she gazed at the battling warriors. I think I will like it here.

 Part 34: Waiting For You

[mari-vargas]

I must be feeling awfully nostalgic to have chosen this as my next story to share. I like to say that there were two people who were absolutely critical to the way my life turned out, or perhaps who knew me more than anyone else every has despite how short a time they could have known me. For you see, they both passed away before I was even half a year old.

My great grandma (on my mother’s mother’s side) is the reason I even had the chance of life in the first place. My parents would say my sister was like having 5 kids in one. They couldn’t fathom adding another to the fold. Then, around when my sister was four, my great grandma told my mom “she’ll never get any better as an only child.” My mom agreed but said she couldn’t handle another. My great grandma told her she “wouldn’t get more than she could handle.” Not long later, my parents came to an agreement that while they wouldn’t actively try for a second child, they would no longer actively prevent it either—and that if a second child did join them, they’d be primarily my dad’s responsibility. Low and behold, along I came and surely there must be some meaning behind the fact that she had such an easy pregnancy with my sister and such a rough one with me.

So yes I feel a large part of my life now is thanks to my great grandma stepping in when she did, but it’s even more than that. The first time she met me, the first time she held me, she predicted something that wound up being a huge part of my core personality and how I react and interact with the world. My mom and sister were arguing, and little 2 month old me did not like it one bit. I didn’t scream and add to the cacophony, but rather fussed quietly and squirmed uncomfortably. My great grandma told my mom that she knew I’d never like confrontation and would seek to avoid or neutralize it every time. She never got to see just how true her prediction was, let alone see me grow into my own to finally stand up for myself and others, actively. Even still, I feel like she would have known then, maybe not specifics, but about the journey I’d be taking in my life apart from her.

At her funeral, I was passed around and “claimed by the clan” as random relatives would rush off to their nearby homes to grab their photos of ancestors and nearer relatives who I so clearly greatly resembled.

The other person though, who seems to hold far more weight in who I am than I can probably ever fully realize, is my grandpa (my mom’s dad). He passed away when I was only 3 months old, and one of the few stories I have together with him is him on his death bed in the hospital and me dancing for him on his belly. There’s even pictures of it.

His weight in my life, however, has nothing to do with any interactions between us. As it turns out, somehow I developed many of his quirks despite having no possible source to have learned them from. If I don’t think about, if I just go on autopilot, I have a tendency to bring my mom and my grandma to tears when they see me eating pancakes. (Hey just to break this up a bit anyone wanna share with me how you eat pancakes? I eat them by cutting off a strip and rotating my plate 90° and repeating eating in a square spiral.) My grandma eventually admitted to me that the reason why she seemed to understand me so much was because she had seen my quirks, my behaviors, my reactions, my personality before—in my grandpa. It’s always felt like every time something has felt exactly right in my world, it comes back to something with him. I’m sad I never got to know him and see these parts of me in him for myself, and yet there’s a part of me that’s glad I’ve always carried him with me in this way throughout my whole life. I’m glad he was there for my grandma to learn about and from, so she could help me through so much later on.

[whatispersonalspacejyp]

Family Problems

Genre: angst... and a bits of fluff 

Pairing: Yang Jeongin x reader

Word Count: 1670

Summary:  Go around the list of family members of the reader with all kinds of problems, but luckily the reader has Jeongin by their side to make them smile again.

Warnings: death, Alzheimer, other sicknesses, insecurities, age gap

A/N: This is based on my family, everything in Italic are real life events. I needed to get it off of my chest as it all becomes to much.

From a young age you had a pretty normal childhood or that is what it seemed like. You had a small family, mom, dad. grandparents and a aunt and uncle. They were very accepting... for the most part.

Your grandmother had died on the age of 60, while you were just 10. She died in the hospital after another heart attack. No it’s not that the doctors were to late, it was her own choice. You and mom weren’t there as there was a tournament. Only to come home later to find your dad missing, sending him a happy text first, only to get a call later to tell them she died.  

You sat on the bed starting at the wall as another sleepless night was on it’s way.  You remembered doing this from a young age, ever since your grandmother died. Guilt was eating you alive. 

Jeongin was laying next to you, as you had a sleepover. He opened his eyes as he didn’t feel your warmth. “Y/N? Hey? What’s wrong?” You were softly crying as you were embraced by him. 

“I never said goodbye to her! Cause of a stupid tournament!” You cried out. You felt so guilty and weird, you never cried in front of him especially not at a sleepover. He holds you close to him as he tries to calms you down. You fell asleep in his arms like always when he was there with you.

After your grandmother died, secrets came out of the bag. She smoked, got diagnosed with cancer and what for you the biggest shock was that your grandfather wasn’t your actual grandfather. He had adopted your dad from. He wasn’t planned, it was all a mistake. A crime that was hidden away.

Your grandfather always stayed the kind man he was, but it was clear he was missing things. He didn’t have a wife anymore who tells him to do stuff. His mental state clearly went backwards, being diagnosed with Alzheimer and quickly going into a elderly home. you haven’t seen him in nearly half a year now, because of difficulties.

You look at Jeongin before your eyes went back on the road. “Jeongin? I’m nervous, I haven’t seen him in a while... I don’t even know if he remembers me.” The two of you got into the elderly house and walks to your grandpa. “Hello, do you remember me?” The elderly male looks up and looks confused. “Do I know you? You know you look like my daughter in law.” This made you tear up. “That’s my mom, I’m your grandchild.” The man looks in shock and went back to confused.

“Do I know you? And you young man do I know you” You grab his hand with a sad smile. “Grandpa it’s me y/n and this is my boyfriend Jeongin.” You two stayed for ten more minutes before leaving again. “Now you know why I don’t want to visit him. I love him dearly, but for him I do not exist. And it’s painful...” 

You look out of the window. “At least he’s still happy, even if he doesn’t recognize me anymore.”

You still had your other grandparents, but things weren’t always great with them. You were in good terms with your grandmother, but the bound with your granddad was different. They were judgmental and slightly racists at times, but your grandmother could accept it more. You died your hair blue years ago and the disproved stares where pointed at you. You see, a few years before that he fell of his bike, you all thought he had some kind of concussion, but was never proven as it was never tested. 

It was painful to hear, nearly every year you get a call that he had an accident again with the bike. It was years later that you could see the damage done to his brain. He was no fun anymore and over emotional. Crying at nearly everything. 

Around a year ago he had an operation to get an artificial knee. You remember clearly how your friend wasn’t thinking by saying. ‘You know you can die while having an operation, it happens a lot with old people.’ Well that broke the friendship as there were major problems with the anesthesia. In stead of an epidural he needed the full anesthesia. Which had brought even more damage to him. And a few weeks ago he fell off the bike again, he didn’t see a car and got hit. He got lucky with just two broken ribs. Saying stuff like. “I got really lucky! It’s my own fault. I should have been dead...”

“Yeah we need to go the dinner! My grandpa will go crazy is we won’t come.” You yelled at Jeongin, trying to grab your stuff as quickly as possible. Jeongin walks towards you and kisses your head. “Yeah, yeah. You are lucky that I do find them nice, despise how racist they can be at times.” Jeongin ruffles your hair and grabs the car keys. 

It was a short drive to the restaurant, but once arriving you could see their looks.

“Sorry, we are a bit late.” You noticed that your aunt and uncle weren’t here yet, which made you feel a bit better. You two sat down and immediately started talking. “So how are you and your Chinese boy?” Grandma asked.

You immediately looked disappointing. “He’s Korean, but we are doing fine!” You said smiling even though you were angry. They did their best to communicate with him, but there was a language barrier which made it slightly harder. 

Once the others arrived you all ordered food, you were holding Jeongin’s hand through the whole dinner. Your grandpa was very nerve wracking by wanted to leave or ask for a waiter if someone didn’t have any to drink anymore. 

But in the end it was a nice dinner, there were a few comments on which you showed disapproval. “Well that could have been worse, but that man is so nerve wracking, it’s very clear he’s not used to sitting down and just talk.” You complained while walking to the car to get home.

Your aunt is a real complainer and a gossip girl. Every day it’s something new to complain about, then it’s her work or her friends. It get’s really annoying after a while, even to the point where you were celebrating if you didn’t see her in a few weeks. 

Your uncle was very chill, but slightly paranoid when it came to gems. His older age made it even worse. Your aunt didn’t really care about that, cause she is 10 years younger. She did have asthma but she made it clear she wasn’t afraid of dust.

“Jeongin I tell you! She is not going to give the party when not everybody comes! She loved the attention.” You said looking at your phone. 

“See I told you so.” You showed him a text message with that she was going to put her birthday party on a other date. 

“I wouldn’t have expect something else anyway.” You hugged Jeongin and started to kiss him passionately when you get another text from your aunt with the same information as before.

“I’m telling you she will send everybody a text, both in group chats and personal.” At that moment Jeongin’s phone went off and got the same text from your aunt. 

“I told you so!” You yelled laughing. “Well the positive thing is that I don’t have to worry about her now and the party. Cause it made me go crazy!” Jeongin smiled at you and throws you on the couch to cuddle.

“You know, they are planning on coming this weekend, we should clean. You know how uncomfortable he get’s if it’s not fully clean.” You whined out as you didn’t like cleaning that much.

You and your mom were like a roller coaster. Then you were best friend and then you were each other enemies, but the last few months being each other enemies was more often then being friends. You drove each other crazy. In her eyes you weren’t allowed to be angry or pissed off, while she could scream at you at any time. She started demanding more and more, which made you lock yourself in your room. She would come in from time to time. 

Your mom had made a few comments about you being overweight and needed to get skinnier. She just doesn’t understand you at all, what she could see as playful could be hurting for you, no matter the pained expressions she never stopped. 

She made you feel even more insecure, you didn’t trust her anymore with something important. She never listens, if you say she must not do it she does, which makes you angry and it leads to her ignoring you for the rest of the day expecting an apology she will not get. 

Your dad was a sweet man, he always tried his best to break of any fight you had with your mom. But you feel scared of him, you didn’t want to make him angry at all. You remembered the reason as if it happened yesterday. You mom and dad were fighting, screaming about dinner. She made when he threw a glass to her head.

It made you afraid of shattering glasses or screaming

You were walking around the park with Jeongin as it was your guys date. You hold his hand as you walked. There was a man screaming loudly at some kids and your first reaction was clinging onto Jeongin.

He didn’t say anything and he made sure you were away from it quickly and found a nice place where you two could see the horizon. Jeongin put the blanket down and then the backpack with food.

“You know Jeongin? I really love you, you accept me for who I am and my crazy family. They really like you even if they won’t say it out loud.” You said smiling as you looked at the horizon.

Tag list: @vampireskzz @kpopwritist

[kzzzo]

chapter 7 pt. 2 - you can never be too happy in this life

'you can never be too happy in this life' yeah, that's still the line

series masterlist - here

previous | next

warning: character death

a/n: aaand she lives! hi, yes, i'm alive! i honestly don't remember how long i was gone but thank you sm for (still) supporting 'with a smile' even if my updating schedule is shit lmao. here's the long overdue part 2 of chapter 7! i hope it's alright 😩

tags: @crayonwriting

-

The timing couldn’t be more perfect for the two of you. Spring break rolled around a couple weeks later, giving you time to work on Kuroo moving into your apartment. Soon enough you were sharing your room with your boyfriend. The triplets were overjoyed to find out that their papa will be living under the same roof and that they get to spend more time with him.

“Papa!” The triplets yelled one peaceful afternoon; excitement evident in the tone of their voice. That could only mean one thing; Kuroo has returned home from volleyball practice. You peaked at the entrance area from the kitchen, seeing how hot and disheveled your boyfriend was. Duffel bag slung across his torso, his hair messy as usual and his lips smiling widely at his little boys.

He picked all three of them up at the same time (which gave your poor motherly heart a scare) causing the boys to burst in a fit of giggles. Kuroo chuckled along with them as he walks the short distance to the kitchen before placing them down on the table. You walk up to him to give him a kiss, standing on your tippy toes to match his height. He grabbed you by the waist the moment you came in close proximity to him.

"I'm home," he whispered.

"Welcome back," you whispered back, giving him one last peck on the lips before pulling away and moving your attention to the food on the stove.

You ate dinner with your family as usually would, nothing really going out of the ordinary until you heard your phone ring from the living room. You were about to stand up in order to retrieve the device but Kuroo offers to do it instead as he was closer to the living room.

"I'll get it." He picks it up then glances at the caller ID which showed the name 'Grandpa'. He instinctively answered it then brought it to his ear. "Hello?"

"(Y/N)— Oh, Tetsurou?"

"Yes, it's me." He began walking back to his spot on the dining table while you watch him curiously, trying to find out who he's talking to and what they're talking about. "I'm sorry, what?"

Kuroo's face went pale, probably due to the news delivered to him. He gulps before shifting his gaze to you.

"(Y/N)..."

You beg Kuroo to drive faster than he already is in hopes of arriving to the hospital quicker. She'll be alright. She's fine. It's just a minor thing, right? Thoughts flooded your mind from the moment you dropped the triplets off at Bokuto and Akaashi's shared dorm room to the present.

Kuroo grabbed your hand that you were nibbling on out of anxiety, giving it a tight squeeze of reassurance. But nothing could keep you calm, all you need was to arrive at the hospital faster and see for yourself that your grandmother would be alright.

The second the car was parked, you dashed out of it and into the hospital, frantically asking the front desk for your grandmother. You didn't even give the receptionist a chance to finish her question regarding your relation to the patient. You simply dashed to the elevator, pressing the 'up' button too many times, as if it would help the elevator arrive faster. When it did, people swore a ghost rushed by at how quick you got on.

More thoughts fill your head, making you forget that you completely left your boyfriend behind, but he understood. Unlike you, Kuroo calmly asked the receptionist for your grandmother's room and calmly waited for the elevator door to open.

On the other hand you were there catching your breath right outside your grandmother's room. You knew she wouldn't be too fond of the state you were in now so you gave your self time to breathe. After a couple minutes you finally lift your fist to knock— beep.

Oh no. It was that beep. The long one. Your heart sank to the deepest pits of Earth. That's not it, right? You were hearing wrong. She's fine. When you walk in, she'll greet you as always. She's fine. She's fine. She's—

The scene that greeted you when you opened the door sunk your heart deeper than what you thought was humanely possible. Doctors, or were they nurses? You didn't know, you couldn't think, were huddled around the bed while frantically trying to revive your grandmother.

In the corner was your grandfather, who had noticed you enter because he was trying so hard not to see his wife battle life and death. You ran to him in tears. He gave you a tight hug, his breath equally as shaky as yours, maybe even more.

The two of you stayed in that position the whole time, earnestly waiting for good news that never came. She's gone. You grandmother's gone. The person who took you in and raised you like her own was gone.

You sink into the chair beside the bed, listlessly staring at her peaceful expression. If it was even remotely possible, more tears rolled down your cheeks. Your breaths becoming even heavier, as you release sobs.

"Grandma," you called out, hoping she'll find her way back to you. Maybe she was just lost. "Granny..."

The more you call for her the more you realize that she's not coming back. You grab her cold hand with both of yours, desperately trying to heat it up as you call for her. You lean your head onto her shoulder and bawled. Her body no longer providing the comforting heat you always loved.

"I said— I said I'm going to repay you... for everything you've done for me." You choked out in between sobs. "How am I going to do that now? Please don't leave me..."

You stayed like that for hours, even after Kuroo came to comfort you. But Kuroo and your grandfather both decided that it would be best to leave you be for now.

After a while you calmed down. Your grandfather approached you and placed a hand on your shoulder.

"She... knew what was coming." He started. "Two days ago, before we came here, she told me she wanted a nice romantic evening before she goes. So we did that. She said she regrets not being able to properly say goodbye to you and the triplets before she goes."

You stare at your grandmother's lifeless body as tears began to flow once again.

"We prepared gifts for the boys for the next 15 years until they turn 18. She said it was the least she could do. She didn't let me contact you until she knew it was her last day. She said it was 'a few days too many of worrying for my baby'."

Once again you were full on sobbing into her shoulder.

"She said she has a last wish for you."

"What is it?" You lift your head, determined to fulfill your grandmother's last wish until;

"(Y/N)..." You felt your body tense at the feminine voice from behind you. You turn around only to see—

"Mom, dad. Why are you here?" Your voice was harsh as you eye them up and down.

"(Y/N), sweetie..."

"Don't you 'sweetie' me. You kicked me out remember?" Your grandfather's hand on your shoulder gave you a slight squeeze.

"(Y/N)... did you know that all this time they've been assisting you and the boys as much as they can? They regret what they did. Please talk to them at least. Your grandmother would be very happy."

You remind yourself that this was your grandmother's last wish as you hesitantly lead them out of the room. Kuroo gave you a look of concern from where he sat, knowing how tense you were. You give him a slight smile to reassure him.

"Just so you know, I have nothing to say to you." You speak up.

"I know, but please listen to us." You crossed your arms and turned to face them, not making eye contact. "I admit that what we did was wrong, that we were too harsh to you. I also admit that the first few months, we didn't care at all, but then one day your grandmother visited us and brought us a copy of your ultrasound. Your dad and I were happy for you, we regretted what we did but we knew you wouldn't even want to see us after all that."

She reached for your arm but you flinch away from her. She sighed then continued her explanation.

"We asked for updates about the four of you. We asked about what we can do to help, even if just financially. I saw how well you raised your boys, (Y/N). I don't have the rights to, but I'm proud. We... didn't plan on approaching you because the pain we caused you was too much and I didn't want you to be in pain again when you see us. But mom said it was her dying wish, and I also wanted to make things right. So, (Y/N), I'm very sorry."

You eyed your parents, checking for signs of insincerity in their words. But their expressions were nothing but sincere. You sigh and slowly approached your mother for a hug.

"Don't get me wrong, I still haven't fully forgiven you. I'm still very hurt. I just think that having things continue the way they were will only be bad for all of us." Both parents gave you a tight hug back, crying. Yoy caught a glimpse of Kuroo sitting outside your grandmother's room from over your mother's shoulder. "I have someone for you to meet."

You pull away from each other before calling for Kuroo. "Tetsu."

Your boyfriend stared at you in confusion, probably wondering why on Earth were you calling him in the middle of a touching reunion. Nonetheless, he complied to your call and approached you sheepishly.

"This is my boyfriend, Tetsurou."

"Kuroo Tetsurou, ma'am and... sir." Without further notice your mom pulled him into a tight hug.

"Thank you. Thank you very much for taking care of my (Y/N)."

Kuroo chuckled as he hugs her back, looking over to you before saying, "My pleasure."

[pastlivesandsecretdreams]

paradise

chapter two: relief and pressure

mike dodds x oc (cecilia “cecily” elizabeth sinatra kennedy)

warnings :: mention of loss, death, plane crash, illness, pregnancy, ect.

song of the chapter : safe and sound by taylor swift

cecily turned to the nurse who had previously called her name. “your husband is okay, just resting. you can go see hi-” before she could finish the sentence, cecily waddled down the hall into mike’s room. as soon as she did, the kennedy girl ran to his side, placing her hands on his face. cecily peppered his face with kisses, not noticing nor caring his team had followed her. “my poor love…” one of mike’s large hands moved to sit her on the bed, before resting it upon her growing bump. “don’t worry about me, bubs. worry about the baby.” cecily looked confused. “but you are my baby!” he giggled to himself softly. “i got to briefly meet your team.” his eyes wandered over to the crew of people he’d come to love as family. “everyone, this is my wife, cecily kennedy.” a gasp erupted from all their mouths. some from realization he had a life they didn’t know about. but amanda was more worried about her celebrity status. “your grandfather was jack kennedy!” cecily giggled and blushed softly. “i’m aware. my best friend, ronan-” she referred to her good friend, ronan farrow, and possibly the son of frank sinatra, which would make them cousins, if true. “-and i spent the day watching debates from the house and senate. then i get-” she nuzzled her head against mike’s cheek, her hands gripping his own. “-the worst call...i hate guns...they’ve taken too much from me. and i don’t intend to lose you too, mr. dodds!” 

mike laughed softly and kissed her nose. “nothing could take me away from you, mrs. dodds.” she took her water bottle out and elevated her feet. no one thought anything of it. the door opened again, and her children ran in, her cousin jack in tow. “papa!” the children scrambled onto the bed, trying not to hurt their beloved father. “papa hurted?” the youngest, john or jack, said softly. “i was, jackie. but i’m much better now that you’re all here. look, kiddo-” he picked up his youngest, with one hand, and faced him towards his team. “-these are daddy’s work friends.” their daughter tugged on sonny’s coat, which caused him to bend down to her level. “do you work for my daddy?” sonny laughed softly and smiled down at the young dodds girl. “yes and no. i work for the nypd, like your daddy and grandpa, but he’s also a higher rank-” the young girl looked unimpressed with his answer. “so, yes.” she said sassily. this earned a stern look from her mother. “i’m sorry about her. she’s got the kennedy spunk.” sonny smiled warmly at the pregnant woman. “it’s quite alright. i grew up with three sisters. i get it.” cecily smiled back until her face turned to pain and she groaned. this caused mike to look over at her worried. “what is it? the baby?” she placed her hands on her bump and took a deep breath. “no- but yes. braxton hicks-” meaning her contractions were false. “are you sure?” her husband asked, worriedly. “yes, i’ve been having them all week.” mike already knew that, but he knew last time she went into labor, cecily was convinced they were false. that lead to her giving birth in their livingroom at six in the morning. “and before you say, “that’s what you thought last time”-” she mocked him in a deep voice. “-i think i know contractions for my body. and my water is still in tact, so...suck it.” this caused laughter to erupt through the hospital room. even when mike was in the worst pain, his little wife could make him feel better with her wise cracks. the doctor walked in and handed cecily a clipboard. “these are his release papers. just sign them and we can get him out of here.” cecelia smiled and read over the forms before signing them. one thing her late father had taught her was to always read anything you were signing your name to. “come on, bubbas.” her daughter gave her little brother a help down and took his hand. much like her father and aunt, her children were close and always helped the other. it made her happy that her father’s, and grandfather’s, namesake was a happy little boy that was beloved by his older sister. it filled her with happiness. cecily often thought about what her father would’ve thought of her little family. she wondered about her father’s opinions of her life, if he missed her as she missed him. it often kept her awake at night. and when mike was home at night, he often found her awake thinking of her father. those nights often consisted of her crying into his neck, as he held her close. mrs. dodds held so many feelings about her father; she missed him, loved him, and she felt guilt. after all, she too was supposed to attend the wedding that her father, step-mother, and step-aunt all perished on the way to. if she hadn’t fell ill, with a stomach bug, she too would’ve died. that wasn’t even the worst of it; her father wanted to stay and take care of her, but cecily told him to go to the wedding and that he could take care of her later. she told him she loved him “more than there were stars in the sky”. it was a phrase her mother had sewn into her blanket before her own death. it seemed that phrase was too cursed as she was. she hadn’t spoke for over a year after she was told of their deaths. but, she made a secret promise to him that her firstborn son would bare his name. and she kept that promise. cecily was pulled out of her thoughts as her husband took her hand in his own, squeezing it three times as if to say he loved her. cecily smiled and kissed his cheek. “i love you too, ducky.” she took two steps before she bent over in pain, one hand now resting on her back, and the other on her bump. while she was eight months along, cecily knew how fast labor in her case could be. her mother only had a four hour labor with her, but cecily had even less time. in both cases, it had been less than an hour. a trickle of fluid found it’s way onto the floor. her face fell as she knew what had happened; her water broke. “okay...maybe you were right…” jack picked up her children for his cousin. “i’ll watch them. you focus on this baby.” she silently thanked her cousin as her husband and father-in-law ushered her to the elevators to get onto the maternity ward. 

i hope you all like this next part! i’ll start working on chapter three soon! 

xoxo, gracie

tag list (comment if you wanna be added) : @evans-dejong​

[chibbybish]

Here With Me (Juice x Reader)

Part 3

Tw: death.

requested by @kchavez666

tag list: @everyhowlmarksthedead

[word count: 1898]

[reading time: 00:15:04]

-I recommend listening to this while reading, for extra crying and heartbreak-

A/N: I know nothing about pregnancies or what the doctors do when you're ready to give birth so if I said something funny or wrong please feel free to correct me in the comments!

"(y/n), wake up!" You heard a raspy voice. "Wake up, sweetie!" You felt someone shaking you.

"Please, I need a little more sleep, please." You said, covering your face with a pillow.

You felt a hand touching your huge belly.

"Look how big he is!" You heard Tig's voice.

"Ah yeah, look at that big guy!" Chibs was there to.

"What are you guys doing here?" You asked, trying to wake up.

"Today is the day doctors predicted you were gonna give birth." Chibs whispered excitedly.

"And we couldn't decide who would come to keep an eye on you so here we are!" Tig added.

"Is everybody else here too?" You asked, rubbing your eyes.

"No, just me and Tig." Chibs informed you.

You tried to get up but you had forgotten how hard that was the past few weeks.

"Let me help you, darling." Chibs held your hand gently and helped you stand up.

"Oh God." You mumbled and ran to the bathroom, for your morning routine.

"Women go through so much just because we accidentally nut in them." Tig sympathized.

"Some of them choose not to go through that, but this one? This one is strong." Chibs acknowledged. "Let's go make her breakfast." He suggested and made his way to the kitchen, with Tig following behind.

Pregnancy was the hardest thing you ever had to do. Throwing up was the worst part of it because, since a very very young age, you had emetophobia. Every time you would throw up in the middle of the night, you would cry and have panic attacks, yelling Juice's name without even realizing it.

You got out of the bathroom with your hand on you belly, lost in your thoughts.

"Good morning, Uncle Tig and Grandpa Chibs." You smiled when you saw them preparing breakfast for you.

"Good morning, love of my life." Chibs kissed your forehead with a fork in his hand.

"Good morning, beautiful." Tig greeted you and left a plate full of eggs on the table.

"Oh my god." You exclaimed when you saw all the food they had prepared.

"Who's gonna eat all that?" You questioned.

"Since you eat for two, they're all yours!" Chibs spoke and showed you a plate full of bacon.

"This is from Gemma, this is from Tara, this one's from Happy and this one is from Opie." Tig showed you a few plates with food.

"Do we have any ice cream?" You asked. Surprisingly, no matter how picky you were with food during those 9 months, you would agree to eat anything in the house if there was no way for someone to get you the food you were craving.

"Ice cream! Coming right up doll." Chibs took his keys and went out of the house. A few moments later, he came back with five big boxes of ice cream.

"I didn't know what flavor you like so I got most of them!" He smiled.

"I love you you guys!" You said and started eating the ones with the chocolate flavor.

You sat on your chair, enjoying the food and the company.

Tig and Chibs were talking about how they were gonna teach your son how to ride a Harley.

"I don't really know why but I'd love to see my little Theo riding a Harley. He's gonna break a lot of hearts." You said, picturing it.

"Theo?" Chibs tried not to tear up.

"Yes, after my father." You said.

"That's one beautiful name." Tig commented.

"Since the moment I found out it's a boy I instantly thought of that name." You smiled.

You felt something dripping wet from your pants.

"Okay, guys, don't panic but I think my waters broke." You smiled nervously, this time.

"OH MY GOD." Tig stood up and grabbed his phone.

"Bring everyone here, (y/n)'s waters broke, I REPEAT-" he started yelling but Chibs took the phone from his hands.

"Call an ambulance first, you idiot!" He hissed.

"No, no, Jax was gonna bring the van, we don't need an ambulance!" Tig started crying.

"Jesus Christ!" Chibs exclaimed.

In front of this surreal moment, you couldn't help but laugh, as you felt small waves of pain on your tummy.

"Okay, (y/n), I'm gonna grab a few things for you. Tell me what do you need sweetheart." Chibs held your hand gently.

"I don't know, get some clothes." You tried to control your breathing.

"You're gonna be okay, love." Tig kissed your forehead and helped you stand up.

"Okay little Theo, please don't be too hard on mommy." He caressed your tummy.

You heard the van stopping right in front of your house.

Chibs came with a small bag of clothes and Tig opened the door.

Jax and Happy ran to you and helped you get in the van.

Tara was there and helped you with your breathing.

"Um, it hurts so much!" You yelled.

"I know honey, please breathe." Tara was as calm as ever.

Jax was on the driver's seat while you were between Tara and Chibs, each of them holding one of your hands.

"You're gonna be just fine, sweetheart." Chibs kissed your cheek.

"Oh my god." Now, you could feel bigger waves of pain hitting your whole body. "It hurts!" You yelled.

"I'm going as fast as I can, darling, we'll be at the hospital in no time." Jax reassured you.

The rest of the guys were following the van riding their Harleys.

"Did you have time to wash her a bit?" Tara asked Chibs.

"No darling, everything happened too fast." Chibs responded.

"Guys, I think I'm gonna faint." You said and a few tears started rolling on your cheeks.

"No baby, you're gonna be just fine." Chibs caressed your hand with his thumb.

"Chibs, I want Juice, where is Juice?" You cried, feelings your heart breaking.

No one had an answer to that, everybody just stayed quiet.

"Why did Juice leave me? This is so hard without him." You kept crying.

The pain was now unbearable.

"It's gonna be okay, darling." Chibs squeezed your hand.

The van stopped and Tara, Chibs and Jax got you out. You could barely walk, with a baby just about to come out of you, but you didn't give up.

As soon as you walked into the hospital there was a nurse with a wheelchair waiting for you.

"Doctor Knowles, we're waiting for you!" She said as she was helping you sit.

Everybody else got into the hospital cheering for you.

"You're gonna do great, (y/n)!" Opie yelled.

"Yes, you're gonna bring a king to this world!" Bobby added and everyone cheered.

"Can the king please be more gentle?" You cried.

"The father can come with us, if he wants." The nurse announced.

Everybody stayed silent.

"His father is an asshole. Can any of us come?" Chibs asked.

"Chibs please come with me." You grabbed his hand.

"Of course. Doctor Knowles, please give him gloves and everything else he needs to wear." The nurse started pulling the wheelchair and got you into a room.

"Okay, sweetie, I need you to help me, now." She took your hand and helped you stand up only to lay down on an uncomfortable bed.

"Breathe, okay?" She held your hand.

As soon as you saw all the doctors entering the room you started panicking.

"I'm here (y/n), don't worry." Chibs said and held your hand.

The doctors helped you spread your legs, after undressing your lower body.

"Oh my god, it hurts so much, please make it stop!" You screamed.

"Honey, I need you to push now okay?" You heard Tara.

You started pushing as hard as you could but the only thing you felt was more pain.

"Push, again!" Tara kept saying.

"I hate him!" You yelled as you were pushing. "He should have been here with me!" You screamed.

"Push!" A doctor said.

"Oh shut up, I'm pushing!" You shouted, feeling just pain.

"Shit this hurts so much!" You whined loudly. "I need Juice here with me. Where is Juice?" You cried and you pushed again.

"You're doing amazing, honey, I can see the baby's head!" Tara said excitedly.

"He should've been here to see it too!" You yelled and went on pushing and crying.

"You're so strong, sweetheart." Chibs said. You could hear him crying.

"I'm gonna kick his ass, you hear me!" You yelled. "He should've been here with me!" You added.

Little did you know that Juice was already there, in the hallway.

"How can you show up right now?" Jax grabbed the collar of his t shirt and pushed him angrily against the wall.

"I know man, I am so sorry." Juice whimpered. "I regret leaving her so much." He cried.

The rest of the members and Gemma, wouldn't talk to him.

"Stay here." Jax hissed and walked away from him.

Suddenly the door opened and Tara god out with her uniform full of blood.

"We're losing her!" She yelled.

Everyone stood up, shocked. Juice ran to her in despair.

"You have to save her, you have to save her!" He yelled.

"Oh you wouldn't care!" Tig raged.

"Please, Tara, save the love of my life, please!" Juice kept yelling.

Tara got back into the room where the doctors were trying to bring you back to life, with Chibs crying his eyes out in the corner, not knowing what else to do.

"Don't you die on me, don't you freaking die on me..." He grieved.

Eventually, you heartbeat was back only for you to die again.

"Again?" Chibs shouted. "Save her!" He begged the doctors.

"Charge!" Tara yelled. "Clear!" Were few of the words that could be heard outside of the room.

"God, please help her." Juice silently grieved, waiting for Tara to come back outside.

"Bring her back!" Everyone heard Chibs' voice.

Some of the guys had already started crying and Gemma, trying to stay strong, was comforting everyone.

Tig, on the other hand, had walked away, crying somewhere in the hallway.

"Please don't take her." He sniffed.

A few minutes later, the door opened and an exhausted Tara came out.

Her hair was a mess and her eyes looked tired.

"She's okay." She said.

"Oh thank God!" Everyone yelled and started laughing, hugging each other.

Tig came back, still crying.

"You saved her, right?" He asked.

"Yes uncle Tig, don't worry." Tara smiled.

"Oh thank you, doctor." Tig hugged her.

"How's our little angel?" Gemma asked.

"Heathy and strong." Tara beamed. And then she turned to look at Juice, who was quietly celebrating.

"Why are you here?" She growled.

"I'm so sorry." Juice kneeled before everyone. "Please forgive me for being such an asshole. I was so scared, I'm so sorry." He cried.

"Get up, you idiot." Said Chibs whom was just exiting the room.

He grabbed Juice's arms and lifted him up.

"You are a father." He hugged him tightly. "Take good care of both the angels God sent you, okay?" He said, with tears in his eyes.

"Okay, okay." Juice hugged him back.

"If she takes you back, we'll all do." Gemma scoffed.

"Please, Gemma, don't be mad at me." Juice wept.

"You're fine, Juicy. Just, don't be an asshole now that little Theo is born." Opie said.

"Theo?" Juice uttered.

Everybody smiled.

"Congratulations, Juice." Tig laughed. "You're the worst dad ever and the kid hasn't even met you yet."

[nikkzwrites]

Yesterday Once More | Dark Fix-It Fic Series | Chapter 11

A/N: This fic is one that I started with my OC because honestly, I personally didn’t like how season 3 ended. So I am rewriting all of Dark with my OC Annalise Dahlheim. I hope you all like it. Some things will be expanded more on just for more depth to Dark that season 3 kinda skipped over so…. yeah.

CW: Canon Typical Triggers: Smoking, Sex, Language, Drugs, Drinking, Death, Violence, Suicide Mentions, Cutting, Violence.

Word Count:  5k

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Jonas and Annalise both shot up awake at the same time in different times both having a dream about the moment that was supposed to be the happiest moment of their lives that was actually just the moments that would cause the disasters that would destroy Winden. One of the two in 2053 and the other teen in 2020. Their movements mimicked each other as the two turned to get out of his bed and pull out a letter. His addressed to him to open when his father died. Hers addressed to open now. They both sighed and walked down the stairs into the main areas of the empty Kahnwald house. Annalise’s stairs were silent to cause Jonas’s stairs to creak twice as loud. As if they were both ghosts in this once happy and lively home. They both took a moment to look at the calendar in the kitchen and walked out to walk amongst the living.

Joans walked around his old town gathering supplies before going back down into the bunker to start his work back up. He found the appropriate tape for that day and placed it into the player to listen to it. 

A woman’s voice rang out, “My name is Claudia Tiedemann. I am one of the few survivors of the apocalypse of June 27, 2020. Almost three months have passed since the catastrophe. It’s still unclear what exactly led to the events in Winden. But the God Particle… If we can stabilize it, maybe it is a way back. Back to the past. Maybe we can save them. All of them.”

Annalise walked down the roads. She walked down to the store to grab something to eat before heading her way back into the woods not too far from the Kahnwald’s or Tiedemann’s. She laid down on her and Jonas’s rock looking up at the leaves above her. She quietly wondered if any of them were the same from that day as she quietly hummed the old song she would sing to Jonas and Mikkel. 

The radio on throughout Winden called, “Wake up, late risers! It’s the first week of summer vacation and it is perfect beach weather.” Across Hannah’s walls were newspaper articles about her son and the rest of the missing people. Several of them with pictures of Annalise as well. “Local News. Over six months after the mysterious disappearance of five teenagers, a senior citizen and a local police officer from the town of Winden, despite one of them being found, there are still no clues as to their whereabouts or the circumstances. A federal police task force will now assist with the investigation.”

Hannah marked off the date on the calendar and looked at the old christmas photo of her small little family. Her tear stained face reeking of how she felt on the inside.

“How do you feel today,” The doctor asked Regina, unaware of Bartosz spying on the conversation, “Still having joint trouble? Nausea? To be honest, your lab results worry me. We should treat you in the hospital again.”

Regina shook her head, “No. Absolutely not. I want to stay here.”

“Fine,” The doctor nodded, “We’ll wait for the next MRI results. We may have to switch from hormone treatment back to chemo.”

Bartosz looked down at his phone to see a text from his girlfriend asking him to go to the bridge.

Clausen stood on top of the podium to give his speech. He was the new head of the Winden task force. Today he was taking over the missing persons cases. He was ready to reopen all the cases and review everything about them until he could solve it. He informed that some people had received summons for renewed interrogation in regards to the cases. He also made a statement that they were going to start trying to push more answers from Annalise as well. 

This received some backlash from many of the people in the town annoyed that not only would they send only one person to help, but the government decided to keep Charlotte on the case as well. 

Magnus looked at Franziska as they sat next to the lake, “Does your mom talk at home? About the investigation, I mean.”

“Not to us,” she replied.

Magnus shook his head, “We sit around and wait. And nothing happens. We know as little as we did eight months ago. Sometimes I think it’d be better if they were dead.”

Franziska rubbed the boy’s shoulder, “Don’t say that.” Slowly, the two teen’s lips met for a passionate kiss. It wasn’t long before that got interrupted by a text tone for the girl. She looked back at Magnus and told him, “I have to go.” She stood up to walk away.

“Where to,” Magnus asked.

“To pick up Elisabeth at a friend’s,” Franziska told him, “I’ll call you later, okay?”

Sensing that Franziska was lying, he waited a moment before following her.

Katharina walked through the woods. Her backpack ready with a map and flashlight. She knew the caves had something to do with all of this even though the police swore with Annalise that this wasn’t the care. Annalise had made a comment that she simply had run away due to stress and came back. She also claimed that Jonas would be back soon, though they went their separate ways so she had no idea where he was presently. Yet it’s been a full month and he still wasn’t back. Katharina prepared herself for her cave journey before walking inside.

Jonas trekked up to the power plant’s broken gate. He walked over to the wall to look at the sign, then made his way to the church. He passed the graves of many of the past residents of Winden there. He knelt down to place the picture of his family on his father’s grave then turned to look at Martha’s.

Martha rode her bike down to the bridge. She parked her bike and hiked down to see Bartosz already sitting there waiting for her. She sat down near him and looked at him.

“I’ve been trying to reach you for days,” Bartosz commented. 

Martha shook her head, “A lot was going on.” She watched as he turned away from her and she tried to say, “I wanted to talk to you. I’ve wanted to for a long time.”

“Save your breath,” Bartosz told her without even looking at her. He sighed and looked over to the girl, “It’s probably better that way.” Martha huffed and looked away from the boy causing him to turn, “So… that’s it then.” Martha slightly nodded, then looked down. Bartosz’s anger erupted, “Because of him? Because of Jonas?!”

“What?!” Martha growled back at him. She tried to fight back tears, “What’s that got to do with it? We hardly ever see each other. I don’t know… You’ve changed! I… What about her then? Annalise? She’s back for a month and you're willing to just throw it all away for her?” Martha shook her head and turned back to him, “I feel like you’re hiding something. I don’t know what’s up with you!”

Bartosz argued, “What’s up with me? What the fuck? My mom is dying! And… there’s stuff I can’t tell you.”

“Why not,” Martha accused.

Bartosz swallowed hard, “I just can’t. Okay? If you knew the crap I’m going through...”

Martha’s anger spewed out, “The crap you’re going through?! In case you forgot, my father and brother disappeared. My ex best friend is the only lead, she is lying to everyone, and won’t speak to any of us because of some stupid thing I said that she is claiming made her disappear for seven months! My mom is crazy and couldn’t care less about me! And you want to tell me about your crap?!” She quickly turned away as Bartosz shrunk down. She panted angrily, ran her fingers through her hair then repeated, “It’s better this way.” She stood up and stormed away.

Bartosz sat there wringing his hands anxiously. He watched her go before receiving a text telling him simply, ‘This evening.’

Aleksander stood in front of all his employees and gave a somber speech. He thanked them all for their loyalty and explained that the plant would be decommissioned in six days. After the speech, he followed his nuclear engineer. They put on their yellow hazard suit and walked inside.

The engineer explained, “Everything has been prepared for transport as planned.”

Aleksander asked, “And the demolition plans?”

“Everything at the ground level will be left and become part of the greenfield,” the other man explained, “The radiation of the barrels will be traced to the pool’s previous use.”

Hannah placed down the box with Aleksander’s once gun and passport inside. She took out the pistol and pointed it under her chin when she was interrupted by a set of keys opening the door. She quickly hid the gun and stood up to look to who that could have been. “Hello,” she called out. When she saw a bearded hooded man walk in, she asked him, “Who are you? What do you want? Why do you have a key?”

“It’s my key,” Stranger Jonas told his concerned mother. He slowly took off his hood so that she could get a better look at him.

Hannah, still not understanding, asked, “What do you mean, it’s yours?”

Jonas tried to calm his mother, “I know it sounds like it makes no sense, but hear me out.” He placed his bag down and walked towards her, “Do you remember the yellow bike? The bike you and dad gave me on my eighth birthday. I rode it into the ditch the very first day. I gashed my arm open. Here.” He rolled up his sleeves so that she could see his scar. 

Hannah panted. She couldn’t believe someone could play such a cruel trick on her. “Get out,” she commanded.

Jonas looked down trying to find what else he could do to convince her. “Here,” he tried again, “Dad was making pancakes here. He dropped the pan and spilled the hot oil here.” He motioned down to the stain on the wood then said, “I vanished from your life six months ago. You found me over 33 years ago. I knew it was you right away. It was raining, remember? Grandpa and you wanted to take me along in the car. You said it was still acid rain because of Chernobyl. I was wearing my yellow coat.” He took a step closer to her, “Momma. It’s me.” He held his hand out to her.

Hannah sobbed realizing he was telling her the truth. She put her hand on his arm and looked up at him, “Jonas?” She gently touched his beard in disbelief that her son would grow one, “But that’s impossible.” She cupped his face as she cried. She moved his hair away and watched him relax at her touch. She pulled him into a hug. 

Franziska walked to her drop spot for Bernette and put the information in before leaving to go get Elisabeth. Katharina squatted down in the cave and marked more places on her map before continuing forward. 

In 1921, Noah comforted his younger self from killing the older man. He told the boy that everything would be revealed in due time and that some things needed to stay hidden away for then so that later they could come into the light. 

“How do we know what’s right and what’s wrong,” the younger boy asked through gritted teeth and tears, “What is good and what is evil?”

Noah replied, “By heeding our inner voice. By not following anyone else but ourselves. Our true nature reveals itself not only in our deeds but also in their purpose. I am you. I am your voice. Never forget that. Everything is connected. You. Me. The past. And the future.” 

In 2053, Jonas walked through the forest of hanging bodies. Soon he heard gunshots and a man shouting. Jonas looked and ran towards the yelling. There was a crowd standing there at the execution. Nuclear gear carelessly tossed to the side as the man yelled. “Who are you,” he yelled, “You are hiding it! There, behind the wall! We saw it! We followed the signal. Till the dead zone. You’re hiding God! You mustn’t hide God. He’s not yours alone!”

Elisabeth nodded her head at the team. They pulled tightening the rope around his neck as he plead. She slowly turned away and looked into the small crowd. She signed and her translator Silja spoke, “No one can enter the dead zone. Any attempt will be punished by death. Those are the rules. We are the future! Sic mundus creatus est.”

The crowd repeated, “Sic mundus creatus est.” Then they departed leaving Jonas alone with Elisabeth and Silja.

“Where were you,” they questioned the boy, “There’s nothing out there. The passage is our only hope. The faithless are dead. The prophecy will come true, the passage will open and we will be led into paradise.”

“The faithless are dead,” Jonas asked back, “Everyone is dead, my family, my friends. Everyone dies in six days, in my time! I don’t need your damn paradise! I just want to go home!” He looked at Elisabeth, “What did they want behind the wall?”

Silja signed to Elisabeth what Jonas had said and awaited for her response. 

Jonas, however, did not have the time to wait, so he turned and left.

In 2020, Elisabeth looked up at her father, “Why did mom keep all of Great Granddad’s things? He’s been dead for years.”

Peter signed back, “I think because it’s the only thing that reminds her of her family. Some things are hard to let go of.”

“It’s a shame I never met Grandpa and Grandma,” Elisabeth told her dad, “Does Mom remember them?”

Peter explained, “Your mother was still little when they died. Come on.” Peter walked more into the shop to look. He turned to see Elisabeth had pulled out a picture of her mother and great grandfather from 1986. Peter chuckled. 

Annalise looked at the time. She bit her lip and started to sneak back towards the Kahnwald house only to be given pause by Bartosz. He spotted her and walked over to her. He stood in front of the girl and said, “Hey.”

“Hey,” She commented back trying to look past him. She then turned to him and gave a small smile, “Is there something I can do for you?”

Bartosz stared at her. Frustration rose in him, “I wish you would just stop fucking lying. Could you do that?”

Annalise started to walk past him, “Honestly, Bartosz. I really don’t know what you mean. I’ve told everyone the truth. Jonas and I ran away after the fight. We found a cheap cabin right outside of a different town not too far from here that we rented while we tried to find a permanent place. We got separated about a month ago. I came back after a week of waiting for him like we planned. He will be back soon. I don-”

WHACK! Bartosz’s fist hit the tree, “Anna! We both know that’s bullshit!” He grabbed her wrist, “We both know about what’s going on here. Please talk to me. You are the only one who I can talk to. Please.”

Annalise tried to wiggle away, “Bartosz, you’re hurting me. Let go. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know about Noah,” Bartosz growled into her ear, pulling her close to him. “I’m part of it too. Just talk to me.”

Annalise pulled away and told him, “I have no idea what you’re talking about! I told everyone what happened and honestly I’m only still here to make sure Hannah doesn’t kill herself and to wait for Jonas to get back so we can both go back home!”

“We both know that isn’t what’s happening,” Bartosz told her.

Annalise turned back to him, “You’re right Bartosz! Jonas left me and he’s never coming back! I should damn well just run off with you! Is that what you want to fucking hear?!” She had tears in her eyes. She grit her teeth as she tried to keep the tears inside. She stormed up to him, “Do you want to run away with me Bartosz?! Leave your dying mother behind and I leave behind a grieving mother on the edge of putting a gun to her head?! Is that what you want?”

Bartosz felt tears building up inside him as well. He looked down and whispered down to her while caressing her cheek, “That isn’t fair. I know you’re scared, but don’t take it out on me.”

“You don’t know the first thing about me,” She hissed and turned away as she felt the tears start to fall.

Bartosz watched her leave and whispered, “I know I love you at least.” He let his tears fall watching her knowing it would probably be best to try and give her space. She knew she could always come to him now and that he would never judge her. He watched her go not realizing that this moment could have possibly been the last he would see her again.

Martha knocked on her brother’s room door. “Mom,” she called into the empty room. She looked around. There on the floor and walls were papers, trails of what her mother was thinking. Martha sat down onto the ground and opened a box to pull out a file. There in front of her was the investigation file. That was when Martha got the thought into her head that maybe it was their turn to start snooping around.

Katharina continued searching in the caves hoping to find her answers. She had no idea if she was going to get them but she had hope that she would. She needed to find her son and husband. She needed to make things right.

“It’s remarkable people don’t crack, given the futility of their own existence,” Adam told Noah, “An endless cycle of life and death. Where is the origin of all this suffering?” He paused then asked, “Did you tell Bartosz?”

Noah turned away from the painting of The Fall of the Damned and nodded to the man.

“And he didn’t get at all suspicious,” Adam asked sitting crossed legged in a chair. He spoke to himself after seeing Noah shake his head, “He has always been naive by nature.” He took a large breath and walked up to Noah, “The apocalypse has to happen. Are you having doubts?” He watched Noah shake his head then asked, “What do you do with an old forest so new trees can grow?”

Noah replied, “You burn it down.”

“There isn’t much time left,” Adam told the man. “The missing pages… you must find them.”

Noah nodded before being interrupted by an older Franziska, “Adam? They’re waiting for you.”

Adam turned back to Noah and said, “Six more days.” He turned and walked out.

In 2020, Magnus turned hearing a rustle near him. He looked to see Bernette going to the drop site and replacing an envelope with another one. She looked around not noticing the boy and walked back to her trailer. Magnus trailed after her. He opened the door and walked in.

“I’m on my break,” Bernette told the person who walked in. When she turned, she was surprised to see a young man there, who looked just as surprised himself. She strolled over to him, “Oh, well… Blow job 40 euros, anal 85. Kinky stuff costs extra, but I need to eat first.” She opened up a ramen cup. Then turned to the young man, “Well, get undressed.”

Magnus panicked. He took a few breaths in before dashing back out of the trailer.

Bernette, confused, walked towards her window and watched as Magnus rushed home.

“You can say I exist infinitely,” Jonas explained to his mother as the sun slowly made its way down to sleep and Annalise climbed her way up the side of the house to sneak into Jonas’s room once more, “I’m here now. And I’m in every second between my birth and my death. I’m always Jonas. I’m the same. And yet not the same.” Hannah looked at the older version of her son as he continued, “Like you’re not the same person who came through that door an hour ago.”

Hannah asked him, “But where is Jonas? Where is my Jonas?”

The Stranger Jonas sighed, “He’s in the future.”

“In the future,” Hannah repeated back as a question.

The older version of her son nodded, “Yeah. He can’t come back. I tried to destroy the passage, but I only closed it. That’s why he’s still there.”

Hannah shook her head and sighed, “Why are you here?”

Annalise walked down the stairs right at that moment causing both of them to stare at her for a moment before resuming the conversation. He said, “To put an end to it all. Once and for all.”

Annalise smiled gently and asked, “Ada- Jonas?” She gently shepherded him up from his chair, “It’s really you.” She collapsed in his arms. She pulled him close to her and took in a deep breath to inhale all of him. Her fingers curled into his back pulling his shirt into her fists. She buried her face in him trying not to let him go. As if she were to let him go that he would be lost to time once again.

He smiled tenderly down at her. His beloved so close to him made him feel truly home. He pet her head gently. He placed a soft kiss against the top of her head as he whispered, “I am Lise. It’s so good to see you again.” He held her close treasuring this moment. It was near ecstasy for her to be so close to him again after so long.

She slowly pulled away and placed a warm kiss against his cheek. “You should get to bed,” Annalise scolded him, “Take a shower then head to bed. You sorely need it.” I can tell just how weary you are.”

Jonas nodded with his eyes half lidded looking at her, “Alright.” He dreamily smiled before going upstairs to do just as he was told.

Elisabeth tried to keep herself occupied as her father went through the boxes. She used this time to start trying to look through books. While looking through one, she found a picture. Surprised she brought it to her father and pointed out the man saying, “That’s him! That’s that man.”

“Which man,” Peter asked his daughter.

Elisabeth explained, “The man with the watch. That’s Noah!”

“Noah,” Peter asked his daughter. He looked down at the picture and stared. There staring back at him was just as his daughter had described before and he knew that it was true. There was Noah.

Back at Sic Mundus, Noah stared at a trifold of pictures of everyone important in the loop. The Doppler’s, the Kahnwalds, the Nielsen’s, the Tiedemann’s, and David and Annalise Dahlhiem. He turned and walked away with his briefcase off to do more of his work.

“Watch out for the tiniest deviations in their statements,” Clausen told Charlotte, “Every detail is important.”

Charlotte turned hearing her phone vibrate. She picked it up seeing a message from Peter telling her, ‘I’ve found Noah. Come to the Bunker.’

 Clausen looked at the woman and asked, “Something wrong?”

“I have to go,” Charlotte tried to rush out.

Clausen interrupted and commented, “I don’t have a driver’s license. I assume it’s okay if I ride with you tomorrow?”

Charlotte turned to him, “Yes.” She walked out to go meet up with her husband.

In 2053, Jonas walked around the desolate forest. He hiked to the bunker. He turned on his spherical light and lowered himself inside. He studied his map then grabbed his Geiger counter before heading out.

Annalise, in 2019, crept into Jonas’s father’s studio. It was actually the first time she had ever been up here. She searched for something where she could toss the letter that she needed to burn. It wasn’t long before she found the metal bucket. But there was something strange. A covered painting. Something inside of her called to it. As if it were meant for her to pull the sheet. The girl grasped the cloth and pulled it away to reveal, looking back at her, a smiling girl. The resemblance was uncanny. Annalise fell to the floor. Her breathing hitched inside of her chest. Tears fell from her eyes seeing her happy naive face staring back at her. She was so full of love. Annalise scrunched her face, she had never met Jonas’s father had she? Much less when she was the age she was in the painting. The pieces slowly came together. She breathed heavily. “Mikkel,” she whispered. She started to sob. Annalise quickly snapped herself out of it. She grabbed the bucket, lit the letter on fire, and dropped it into the bucket watching it burn.

Martha scattered the papers and documents around trying to find any clue she could. Magnus slowly opened the door to see his sister on the floor acting erratically. Martha looked up to defend herself, “Mom didn’t lock it.”

Magnus took a breath and asked, “What’s that?”

“Dad’s stuff,” Martha replied, “Police documents and maps of the cave. That’s why Mom goes there every day. I think she’s looking for this.” Martha handed Magnus the file.

Magnus studied it, “A door. In the caves?”

Martha nodded, “It goes to the nuclear power plant. They all know something we’re not supposed to know. Mom, Bartosz, The police, Annalise.” She sighed shaking her head, “Each with their own shitty secret.”

Angry, Magnus started to breath heavily trying to process that maybe that thing Martha said at the very beginning, the day Mikkel went missing, was true.

Bartosz trekked to the caves alone. He stood there waiting for Noah only for the man to approach from behind him, coming from deep inside the cave.

“Are you ready,” Noah asked the boy.

Bartosz nodded and followed the man into the cave, but not before turning back to take a look at Winden again.

Woller walked out of his sister’s trailer and complemented, “Thanks for the coffee.” He pulled out an envelope with money and handed it to her in exchange to the keys of the large shipping truck parked next to her trailer. 

“I’m glad to get rid of that thing,” she commented nodding towards the truck. 

Woller was just about to leave. He didn’t like that this was how he and his sister were communicating. He looked at her and said, “Call Mom again. Okay?”

Bernette nodded and allowed herself to hug her brother before he left with a simple exchanged ‘bye.’

Charlotte drove to the cabin and climbed down into the bunker. When she got there her husband turned and showed her a very old photograph.

Peter pointed, “That is Noah.” Charlotte looked up at him surprised, then took the picture to study it more closely. Peter continued, “Elisabeth found it at the store. It was in a book. She said that’s the man who gave her the watch.”

Charlotte turned it over to see the date on it was January 8, 1921. She read aloud, “Sic Mundus Creatus Est.”

“Charlotte, who are these people,” Peter asked her, “Why did your grandfather have this?”

Charlotte shook her head, “I don’t know.”

Peter scoffed before Charlotte added it to the evidence on the walls of the bunker. They turned to each other in disbelief. 

Franziska tried to call Magnus again as Elisabeth napped with her head on her older sister’s lap. He kept rejecting her calls. 

Hannah sat on the edge of Jonas’s bed as Annalise walked in. She turned to the girl and motioned to her older son’s scars. Annalise made no inclination of change in mood. Her face looked empty and devoid of any feelings once so ever. The two switched places as Hannah walked down stairs to go to sleep herself.

Regina slept in her bed in the house as her husband poured the concrete over the waste. He stared at it as Clausen stared at his board of missing persons.

The young Noah walked out of Sic Mundus and the young Jonas walked through the trees trying to get to the plant to sneak inside. There he found a tunnel which he crawled through and followed the signal to where the pool once was. 

Feeling the shifting of weight on the bed, the older Jonas jerked awake. He quickly and effectively grabbed Annalise and tossed her under him. His breathing fast and heavy until the hasy mist of sleep dissipated from him to reveal who it was. Seeing her face calmed him. He gently cupped her face and smiled through tears. “You really shouldn’t sneak up on people like that,” he commented rolling over to lay down once more.

Annalise turned onto her side so that way they were face to face as they spoke, “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. I just…” She swallowed, “You are so injured my love.” Tears fell from her eyes onto his pillow. 

He nodded, “Yes, but it’s all to end this. I’ve seen far worse than what those scars tell you.” His thumb traced her cheek as he spoke quietly to her. He tried to soothe her tears away. He joined their hands together. He pulled them up to his rough and battered lips so that he could kiss her soft smooth knuckles before linking their fingers together. He kissed her forehead and confessed, “I am so sorry for everything. If I were only wiser, we wouldn’t be tangled into this knot and you would never feel any of this pain.”

A small smile fought its way onto her face as she tried to comfort him as well, “My dearest, it is alright. I know you will fix this. You will always be with me,” She kissed his cheek, “Please never let me go.”

The younger Jonas found it. He slipped into the yellow radiation suit and stared at it. They were right. There in front of his was the God particle. He turned and looked at all the documents surrounding it before turning his attention back to the black throbbing tendril-filled swirling sphere.