#when i say i hate ai art than this guy is an expection

[spinjitzuladykaia]

Zane,the only AI who can be trusted to draw

[scotfraweek]

It’s here guys! The long awaited list for ScotFra Week! Thank you to those of you who voted on the poll/form

I hope you guys like the list I created. I had to really think this through and really decide how I wanted to organize the Themes/Prompts in a way that would not only make sense but that would be interesting and bring out your creative and imaginative ideas to the event.

Now without any further ado, here they are

🌹Day 1 - October 20

Soulmates / Reincarnation

“Maybe we make it in another universe/life”

“Have we met before?”

High School Sweethearts

Differences Attract

❤️Day 2 - October 21

Humanverse VS Fantasy

“We can build something new, for us.”

“Have you ever wondered, of what could’ve been?”

Long-Distance Relationship

🌹Day 3 - October 22

A/B/O or Pirates/Merfolk

“I was here first!”

“Is this what you want?”

Unplanned Pregnancy

Jealousy

❤️Day 4 - October 23

✨F R E E D A Y✨

Anniversary

🌹Day 5 - October 24

Horror / Supernatural (In honor of Halloween)

“Why is there so much blood?!”

“So everything you said was a lie?”

There was only one bed

Serial Killer/ Haunted House

❤️Day 6 - October 25

Artist/Fan or Detectives

“There was a slight miscommunication”

“You’ve never done this before, have you?”

Love = Weakness

Rivalry

🌹 Last Day - October 26

Angst/Hurt or Post Apocalypse

“Do you remember when…?”

“I trusted you!”

Character Death/Still Alive

The End of the World

🌹 Of course if you guys would like, you can mix and match. If a prompt from a different day fits your idea for one of the Themes, you are more than welcome to use it. You also can use more than one prompt if you wish as well!

❤️ Art, fics/one-shots and moodboards are all welcomed. Anything that you can use to express your imagination and creativity

✨How to submit your works✨

Just tag the account @scotfraweek as well as the #/ScotFraWeek2024 with your submission/post

✨R U L E S✨

Yes, there are rules guys… please follow them

I will not tolerate any bashing of other Hetalia Characters even if it is for the sake of your idea. Please be respectful of the other characters, I don’t want any fan-wars bc someone’s blorbo was bashed

Try to keep politics and actual life events to a minimum, no need for there to also be any actual hate/fighting during the event amongst participants.

I will say this only once, please to not use other artist’s/writer’s work to enter the event. All work must be solely yours. If someone calls you out for plagiarism, I will NOT be defending you, you’re on your own for that

Please, please, PLEASE, and I can NOT stress this enough, but absolutely no AI can be used for your submissions. Once again, all works must be unique and original. If your work requires AI, then it is NOT original. I will not reblog your work if i get the slightest hint of AI work, and believe me, I can tell

Please keep comments on other participants work friendly. Respect the other participant’s submissions for the event. If you do not like someone’s work for whatever reason — Block the user. I will not stand for any hate/bullying in other people’s post because their work did not meet your expectations. This also goes for spectators who will not be submitting work of their own.

Finally, have fun! This event is about showing love and creativity for the french bastard and his ginger himbo hubby. Bring out your creativity and your best suit!

Late submissions will still be accepted up to 3 days after the event is over!

‼️If you feel like another participant’s work is breaking the rules or is offensive towards you or anyone else, be sure to let me know so proper actions will be taken

📫The account’s inbox will be open for any questions or even ideas that you have in regards of the event!

💔I genuinely do apologize, I had truly intended to have this out a few days ago, but … things happen. I hope you are not too mad or upset with me

🤍 Can’t wait to see all your guy’s works next month, see you then!

@hetaliacalendar if you wouldn’t mind reblogging for a little signal boost pls 😭

[hacked-by-jake]

SPOILERS

Alright I have way too many thoughts and emotions so there ain't no way I'm gonna be able to organize everything into a nice sentence but I still gotta get it out 🤣🤣

First off, my notes app with some of my thoughts I wrote down while playing (in chronological order):

Where's Jake?

No premium?

Why and where is nymos

Why are we playing candy crush instead of hacking

Again: Where's Jake, he prob sees our chats and knows whats happening (hopefully)

The characters seem like an almost identical reflection to duskwood

What happened to Richy, please don't die on me 😩

Where's the others

We're now paying to see the secret chats

Why's this game taking so much of my money

Ash really be making me cry about Jake again 🥴

Eric be throwing himself at us when I still want to stay loyal to my hacker boy 💀

The ending: I KNEW MY BABY WAS ALIVE I LOVE HIM, I DEMAND HE TALKS TO US NEOW 👹

AND ALAN I MISSED HIM TOO MWAH MWAH

Rant 1:

The money milking makes me sick and don't even get me started on the ai 🫡 I spent 17 bucks today, halfway through the first episode and already out of all the materials I bought. It's disgusting how Everbyte has completely flipped and is practically scamming their players. Based on the prices, it's almost 3 dollars to view one picture 🙄 I would be more than happy to buy a premium package like duskwood for $20 or even 30 but $17 for not even half an episode is a crime 😭😭

Rant 2:

It's crazy how long this game took and yet it's way worse than duskwood. I was expecting a few additions, not subtractions.

Rant 3:

There is no way to see previous media and calls like in duskwood and no chat history like they promised. I never would've thought it was possible, but these mini games are way worse than duskwoods. And I realized how childish it all looks, I hate how we get no explanation for anything we're doing in the game.

Conclusion:

I'm pissed but seeing the anonymous mask gave me life. I need to go replay duskwood to cleanse myself of moonvale 😮‍💨

Pahahaha you're really killing me with your thoughts, I love your humor so much. 😭

I really should also start to write down my first thoughts while playing but I fear I will write down something to every little sentence I read. xD

But it's so true, where's Nymos? Give us Nymos back! My emotional bond with this unreal little dude is huge so I seriously need him. It's literally a program but it's a he you can't change my mind because I imagine Nymos as Jake best friend who's exactly like Jarvis from Marvel. (Sorry if you don't know it but then I really recommend you to watch the Iron Man movies. (Actually all marvel movies but we're talking about Jarvis here so you best see or more like hear him in Iron Man)

Btw my headcanon is that Nymos is not just any program but also an AI. So and now I will expand the headcanon and say Nymos is an AI that is against AI art and nobody can stop me, hehe.

The Candy Crush comparison makes me laugh every time and it hurts me because it’s true. xD

The thing with the characters being identical with the Duskwood characters... It's a hard topic in my eyes.

Some people say it way too early to judge this. And it's true. We didn't saw much now. But I do think we can already judge them a bit by what we saw. And when we compare it with how the Duskwood characters were in the first episode, I do think you can see that there's not much yet, sadly.

Like, we had Thomas, the idiot in love with problems to take criticism. We had Jessy the hanger-on that were clinging to Dan but then decided to change sides. We had the funny sunny boy Richy. The pretty cold acting Cleo. We had bitchy Lilly and of course we had the grumpy and unfriendly Dan. They all acted pretty strong from second one, in my eyes.

But I somehow absolutely don't think the Moonvale characters are like the Duskwood characters. Because well, I really think they need stronger personalities.

We have Eric who's a pretty normal guy and even though he tripped twice in one episode he's not at all like Thomas.

We have Ash who's like a very, veeery light version of Jessy and Lilly, in my eyes. Somehow kind but somehow absolutely not trustworthy.

We have Violet who's just.. there sometimes. Even the drunken police chief is more expressive.

Well and Charlie is.. Somehow like Richy and in my eyes has the strongest personality so far.

Oh and not to forget Brian who wasn't even there. Lol.

So yeah, I understand both points but I might see it a bit differently.

"Why's this game taking so much of my money" had me on my knees, laughing and crying at the same time because it's almost funny what Everbyte did and it's just as sad.

During my first playthrough I was also like: Someone give me a crucifix I need to get rid of Eric as soon as possible.

But while replaying I just had to see what happens if you decide to get closer with Eric and I swear it didn't disappoint me. It was hilarious and truly, I want this with Jake. I need such a chat with Jake! Everbyte, please!

I mean, I'm not flirting with Eric because I think he's hot or anything. Sadly, his character isn't interesting to me in this sense. (I need the mysterious guys xD) But I just had to try it and I mean, who knows if it will be important later. It's manipulative, I know, but don't judge me. And also, there's still this little hope for a jealous Jake. *ahem* Sorry, I promise I still feel bad for flirting with someone else. 😩

But gosh, the side story end. It was worth all the wait, really. I said before, I don’t forget about the negative things because of it but I'm just a silly, lonely, disappointed girl in love with a fictional hacker, let me have this adrenaline boost!

And yes, I was so happy when I saw Alan's body cam. I immediately knew what that means but at first I was just so happy to "see" Alan as well. I really like this guy, I can't stop myself.

About rant 1: I love the comparison with "So expensive is a picture" it is just as true and actually shows again how incredible it all is. I’ve said my opinion many times now, and I still want to protect Everbyte and give them a little empathy. But it's sadly just true.

I had a thought about that (what you said in rant 2) before and wanted to make a post about it later. So I hope it's okay if I get to it later.

Rant 3: This is actually one of the things that botherse the most. We can't rewatch calls, videos and pictures. The chats are disappearing and are gone forever. And they told us it will be different and that's so annoying. Not being able to see it in the app is just bothering for me. And yeah, that they broke the "promise" is as well. We all were so happy about the chat thing and now...

I actually like the look of Moonvale even if I would prefer something much darker. Especially with the mini games. The background is AI, of course, so. It would look much better with a real background.

And the damn mini games... I loved the ones in Duskwood so much. I really did. It was so much fun and I was one of the people who found them very easy.

But now the Moonvale mini games. By lord. Even though they're much easier for me in my replay, the first time I was actually this close to throwing my phone against the wall. I mean, I even went to sleep at some point and finished the game the next day! Everyone who follows me since duskwood knows I would rather shave my head than that. But they're just pain. And I seriously hope Everbyte will make them a bit easier or give us moves! Because this was often the biggest issue for me. Not enough moves. But they want you to buy gems so... 😒

Your conclusion sound good. I'm definitely planning to replay Duskwood as well. If I want or not. I have to. I need the comforting atmosphere and my emotional support hacker.

So I would say, see you in Duskwood, my detective friend. 🫡

No, jokes aside. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me and us. As I said, I love your humor and the way to describe the things. And I really enjoyed answering it. 💚

I hope you could calm down a bit as well. I definitely needed some days before I could see it more clearly.

And as always a huge pleasure to see you here again. 💚😌

[muninnhuginn]

Thanks for the tag, @roseofcards90!

Last song listened to:

Currently watching:

Move to Heaven (kdrama) - this probably isn't my usual fare, but I think I'm liking it so far? (Finished the first two eps) It's basically about telling the stories of the dead and making sure they get the respect they may not have received in life. One of the main MCs is autistic (as in, literally diagnosed) and the writing/acting seems to have a good balance so far with not babying him by showing he is competent but just has different rules and different people "get" him to varying levels? (There are definitely some little bits like the implication that his dad learnt sign language for him that feels warm rather than some writer just googling "common autistic traits") Will see how it goes anyway. It seems like the story of the day is episodic but the character stuff is building in the background.

Link Click (donghua) - Started watching this when s1 was airing but it was airing in the same period as Oddtaxi so the mystery parts of my brain were focused more on that at the time. To simplify it, it's a time travel donghua where the MC has to go back in time in order to retrieve info without altering the timeline. Season two is airing now and whilst I prefer s1 still overall s2 is still pretty interesting? Season one is more episodic/structured into arcs with a character focus, whilst season two is more full pelt mystery (so it's a bit surprising I prefer s1 tbh).

Jujutsu Kaisen (anime) - I'm an anime-only with this and am probably going to remain that way (especially from what I've gleaned about the manga - I might just watch to end of season two then leave it be?). Season two so far has captured me more than season one, though I've not seen the latest episode yet so will see if that holds when we return to the main cast. Either way, the openings and endings are genuinely so well-made. Even if the series goes entirely in a direction I hate I know I'll always have them.

Again My Life (kdrama) - Lawyer guy gets into trouble trying to take down a powerful guy. Gets killed (shocker). Gets sent back to his younger self to do it right this time. Not a super original plot admittedly, but it's a chill story so far and the relationships between the main cast in it (pretty much all platonic at least at this stage) are all really sweet. It's also doing surprisingly well in giving the female characters interesting conflicts

Adventure Time (US cartoon) - Not watching the whole thing and I have seen a number of random episodes out of order before, but am trying to crash course my way through enough to watch Fiona and Cake. Just finished the episode about Finn's ocean phobia and um, bit more yikes than I was expecting at this stage, but okay. Also, unfortunately, I can entirely see what people mean about Bubblegum&Finn being inspiration for Makima&Denji

Currently reading:

Klara and the Sun - first arc complete, extremely worried about some flags I'm picking up, rip. It's from the POV of a robot (AI kinda deal) and narration-wise, it really shows. Klara's pretty naiive in some ways, but the world-building and clues still make their way through the narration filter

House of Leaves - okay, ngl, I'm not far into this at all, but I've been confused about references to it for years and it seems meta so I'm going to get through it

Will bundle manga in together for ones I'm properly keeping up with rather than checking in every few months to catch up so: Skip and Loafer (monthly release), Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun (monthly), Spy x Family (fortnightly). Webtoons: Rebirth (weekly), unOrdinary (weekly).

Current obsession:

idek what I'd count because I'm into a few things rn and none of them to the extent I've done the whole deep dive? I'm being relatively chill, for me, I'd say. I'll say Link Click, Good Omens, Spy x Family are the things I'm most into nowadays? Good Omens is definitely what I have the most reblogs queued up relating to by far. There's just so much art and meta and I'm not used to being into a fandom here that just has so much. It's a bit overwhelming, honestly

Not sure who to tag but anyone who sees this and wants to have a go feel free (and feel free to ping me in it, I'm nosy) ^^

[max1461]

things that get on my damn nerves about all the fucking political ideologies or whatever idk this is not an effortpost i'm just in a bad mood:

leftists with liberal arts degrees - uwu every problem is just social dynamics uwu!!! it's all just culture and if we reformed our culture all the problems would go away!!! what??? you say we still wouldn't be able to cure cancer because protein folding is an NP-hard problem??? well i'm a soft little delicate bean not an icky tech bro so i don't know what that means, but computers are a social construct anyway so if we all just believe the computers can solve protein folding faster they'll be able to and it'll all be fine!!!

middle aged years old white american liberals - boy gee howdy things are getting bad lately... i heard on the tv that people were being mean to minorities, and i said "whaaaaat? in america, land of the free, home of the brave? people being mean to minorities, i just don't believe that." but then the tv lady said it was all the fault those damn republicans and then it made sense. i hate those guys, always voting for the red team when i vote for the blue team! i think their wacky antics have corrupted the beautiful noble soul of this great nation *holds hand to chest and sheds tear*. i mean, it's gotten so bad that i had to see a homeless guy the other day ewwwwwwwww. but as long as we put some real americans in charge again i know they'll clap back against those meany republicans on the TV and everything will be ok

capital L Liberals who know their econ(TM) and run pseudonymous blogs elaborating on the virtues of rationality and so forth: well you see, what these low IQ protestors just don't understand is that the opportunity cost of radical social change is simply greater than the average expected marginal equilibrium dynamical risk profile of just ignoring all their concerns and telling them to fuck off. now, if you're low IQ not literate in the ways of rationality, it may seem like common sense why these people would be upset, given that within living memory it was both legal and highly encouraged to smack them with a large stick and insult their mother whenever you saw them in public. but thankfully we live in a more enlightened age now, so in fact all their protesting is actually very suboptimal equilibrium non-central fallacy coordination problem. i think it's our solemn duty as high IQ rational and thoughtful individuals to condescendingly discuss how very silly and un-chesterton's fency all their demands are and then go back to talking about AI or whatever

grungy aestheticblog christian fascists who are on their 700th twitblr account because they just get ip banned automatically after a couple days at this point: *all opinions delivered in the form of cryptic text photoshopped over blurry images of balkan paramilitary dudes standing around in the woods with zastava m21s or some shit* one day things will get better. one day the forces of evil will retreat and light will come back to the world. until then, i will hold out for my lord jesus christ and i will not yield. i will not eat their bugs. i will not say their woke incantations. i will not bow down to the forces of modernity. lord give me the power to do what kaczynski could not. until then i will wait with love and peace in my heart. *barrage of nazi occult symbols*

[cadiebug]

Truth to my Heart (and other things)

Summary-

Bucky gets hit with some type of truth serum and suddenly he can't lie and he has to say everything he thinks. This just leads to some unwanted confessions.

(This is mostly just pure fluff and silliness for my enjoyment and its purely self indulgent)

Bucky had left at the early hours in the morning, being called away for a ground mission for S.H.I.E.L.D, he had mostly slipped away without Sam noticing the absence in bed. He had poked his head up from the pillows. "Buck."

Bucky looked up from where he was slipping a knife into his thigh holster. "Go back to bed, I'll be a little awhile." When Sam raised an eyebrow Bucky continued. "Just something for Fury."

Sam nodded, flopping down into the soft warm sheets.

-Now for context Sam and Bucky had been through a lot together, they could relate in a sad way. Now Bucky and Steve could probably relate to each other better, but Bucky always said that Steve was there for him of course. But he expected the original Bucky back, the one from the 40s, he walked around him on eggshells and it bothered him. So he stayed with Sam. Now that brings them to the fact that He and Sam were sharing a bed. It helped with the nightmares. It helped with feeling alone. For both of them. This just happened to be one of those nights where they both needed someone to comfort them. Plus despite being all silent and broody and having a metal arm Bucky was pretty comfortable. Sue him.-

Bucky had slipped out without waking Sam again and he was not gone for a little bit. It was night again by the time he was back. 9:30 is when FRIDAY allertated him that Sergeant Barnes was back. It was like the AI could read his mind. Yeah he didn't like that. Muttering a quick thanks to her, he ambled his way towards the kitchen.

Nat was sitting on the counter while Wanda bit into a sandwich, both looking over when he came. "Hey guys, how'd it go." He looked around the room. "And where's Bucky?"

Nat nodded. "Good, just dealing with a bunch of fucked scientists and he ran off to his room as soon as we got back." Sam nodded about to turn towards the hallway where some of the bedrooms were when Wanda spoke up.

"Sam, he got hit with some chemical, some kind of truth serum. We asked Bruce what to do but he just told him to sleep it off." She finished, looking back down at the plate with the other half of the sandwich, she held it out towards Nat, who took it and thanked her.

Sam nodded again, walking down the hallway a little faster than he originally intended.

No wonder Bucky didn't just immediately float towards Sam's way like he always did. Usually either to just complain, or to throw himself on top of Sam and fall asleep.

Sam stared at Bucky's door and completed what he was going to do once he was actually in the room. He knocked and immediately heard Bucky's voice on the other end. "Come in, unless you're not Sam, Nat, or Wanda." The second part was added after a second and Sam wanted to laugh. This was great. So far.

Bucky was huddled on his bed holding a book, he looked up at Sam and watched as he settled on the bed in front of him. "You know I don't know why I'm reading this, it sucks." He tossed the book off the bed. Sam looked over at the cover.

"The notebook."

"Wanda said it was good. It is not. It's just a really toxic relationship. Also why are all relationships in books painted as romantic when really it's just gross or abusive in one form or another. I though we moved past sexist romance." Sam laughed, "The future is bullshit Sam." And then Sam laughed again and Bucky was back to staring. Sam cocked his head in a silent question. "You know whenever you ask me why I'm staring or what I'm thinking about and I say nothing it's actually usually about you."

"Not all the time, just a lot of it." He took in a breath and his eye's looked pained, like once he started it was hard to stop. "Like your smile, I love it so much. The gap in your teeth is adorable, like I know you hate it but I certainly don't. I also really like your eyes, I think most people just think they're brown. But if you look closely they look like a pretty chocolate brown, like ones I could fall in love with. They're pretty. I mean you're just pretty in general, you're kinda a work of art. Like an actual gift from god or something." At this point his entire face was flushed red. "And you're just so nice, and you're kind to everyone. Except for yourself sometimes, you should really give yourself some credit and love man."

"Wow." Sam just stared at the mouth hanging open, like a fish. Bucky continued, unprompted.

"You know everyone thinks they have you figured out, like you're this charismatic, funny, cute guy that everyone loves. And somehow it's strange when you're quiet. But really that's just how they see it. You're so stuck in your own head sometimes. I mean you're really fucking pensive. That's normal for you, for me, but not for them. I think it's kind of nice you don't feel the need to put up that shield around me. It's like you trust me."

Sam took a second, a second. God gave him strength. "Buck." He breathed out almost like a whisper.

"I didn't mean to say that. I mean I meant it but I didn't want that to come out of my mouth. God I think I'm fucking this all up, I wasn't going to say any of this for a long time, prefebly for forever. Just cause you know, friendship and all that bullshit. I just really want to stop talking right now."

"Yes I realize that and no you are not fucking this up" He looked Bucky up and down beofre skooting forward so he could lean into Buckys form. "Its, okay Buck and I think I'm gonna cry." And before Bucky could answer in fear he continued. "But like a happy cry." Okay and maybe he was already crying, just slightly and maybe he only realized this because he felt Bucky's gentle hands wipe the tears away. "God, I think I love you."

Bucky laughed and Sam looked up from where he was resting comfortably on the other's chest. "I love you too."

Sam pushed himself further into the others' space. "You're gonna sleep here." It wasn't so much a question.

"I don't think I have a choice, but I would anyway."

They would talk about it in the morning, when Bucky wasn't saying everything that came to mind.

[jupitermelichios]

On a more possitive note, I’ve started watching Sword Art Online. It’s one of the worst things I’ve ever seen (and the last film I saw in cinemas was Cats to give you context for the scale i’m working on here) and I kind of adore it in much the same way I love garbage like Smallville or Twilight. It’s so stupid on so many levels. You could challenge someone to write the worst anime, and it would almost certainly be better than SAO. It’s almost hypnotic how terrible it is.

No one should watch this terrible terrible show so I therefore don’t feel at all bad that I’m about the spoil absolutely everything, but honestly if you do also hate-watch this please come talk to me about how terrible it is. I don’t know anyone else who watches it.

Highlights of Season 1 include:

everyone is trapped in an MMO, and if you die in the MMO you die IRL. but if you were a beta-tester you’re probably fine because they just let them keep all their levels and items from the testing, so they’re all massively OP and everyone just accepts this as a normal and non-game-breaking thing

it’s a fantasy MMO but there’s no races, no magic system, no weapons except swords and maces, and not even an option to dual wield - literally all you can do in this fucking game is stand in front of an enemy and mash the attack button. I’m pretty sure they’re trapped there because the devs realised no one would play this post launch-day otherwise because it’s boring as shit

when the villain traps everyone he also just changs all their avatars to look like they do IRL for absolutely no reason, like actually none, he doesn’t even say he thinks it would be funny, he just does it and no one questions it and it is literally never mentioned again because this is the worst TV show ever animated.

in the second episode the main character deliberately witholds information about how to defeat a boss, indirectly causing multiple deaths. there is absolutely no reason for him to withhold it, he was just being a jerk because he doesn’t like people

in the third episode they reset his entire personality and he’s now a selfless hero pretending to be a lower level than he really is so people will find him more relateable and be his friend because all he wants is to help people. this is not a consequence of episode 2, they just decided they didnt like the character as he’d previously been written.

he makes some new friends who are all objectively terrible people who have decided for no season that the twelve year old who doesn’t really know how to play and keeps having anxiety attacks about the very real possibility of death has to be the guild tank. the MC is high enough level to be functionally immortal in like half the levels, but doesn’t tell anyone this he just lets them go on bullying this child

none of his friends survive that episode, in the game or IRL. which is also a christmas epsiode. a child dies in battle because she’s a terrible tank and then a man commits suicide out of guilt, so then the main character murders santa to try and bring them back from the actual dead but it doesn’t work because again, this is a video game and they are dead IRL, so then he walks off into the snow alone. Christmas!

we meet the best character in the entire show in episode 4, Rosalia, who has gone evil and started just straight murdering people because she’s sick of being an attractive adult woman who can’t get a date because she’s surrounded by lolicons who are only interested in the preteen characters (not a joke, that comes up, the show is firmly on the side of the lolicons)

in the same episode we get an extended bra and panty sequence staring an actual fucking child, like canonically this character is maybe 13 at best. this is one of only 2 occaisions when they feel the need to undress a character and it’s the fucking 12 year old, it’s so gross it reads like a parody of itself

literally every single named female character aged over 8 who talks to the MC falls in love with him after like 5 minutes (and in season 2 this includes his actual sister). he shows absolutely no interest in any of them (including his sister, thank god) until...

the main character gets engaged to a girl he only knows from an MMO after a virtual single date (he doesn’t actually win her in a PVP match but only because he looses the match, he 100% canonically tries to win her in a match, which she is apparently fine with). he then doesn’t bother to ask for her real name until the final episode, he just calls her by her screen name

(that’s okay though becuase it turns out that this moron of a love interest used her real name, on a local server, in a game where your character looks like you do IRL, because apparently getting doxxed is her hobby)

they then get in-game married off screen. there’s not even like a still of a wedding photo. nothing. the main character proposes and then the show immediately jumps to the honeymoon, it’s fucking bizarre.

they find a creepy child dressed all in white with no memory alone in the woods a week into their honeymoon who starts calling them mommy and daddy literally seconds after they first meet her, and they don’t suspect anything suss is going on and adopt her

for hilarity bear in mind the main character may only be 15 at this point (he says he’s only just turned 16 in the last epsiode, but his actual birthday is never mentioned), and his virtual wifu is 16, but no one ever questions the marriage or the adoption, even though ‘hey marriage in a video game is as important and meaningful as marriage in real life’ is an actual conversation people have multiple times. also they think the child they adopt is an actual IRL 8 year old who thinks these randos she met in an MMO are her mum and dad and everyone just goes with that like it’s a totally normal thing

a character called ‘Thinker’ agrees to meet an enemy faction leader for peace talks. the “peace talks” take place in a high level dungeon and he is told to come alone with no weapons and no fast travel. he does this. no one ever comments that his name is ironic, and in fact they seem to think that being betrayed and trapped in a dungeon with a boss is a totally unexpected turn of events Thinker could never have planned for

they take their new baby into the dungeon to rescue thinker, because they went to the jean grey school of baby rearing, and she imediately reveals that she’s actually a magical maggufin with infinite power, murders the grim reaper, and then dies. In literally the second episode she’s in

after she dies the MC hacks the admin account of the game, converts her corpse into an in game item, and saves to the local storage on his console, with the intention of bringing her back to life as a robot once they’re saved from the game. I’m not joking, that’s an actual thing that happens.

the fact that the main character can just access the main admin account and make massive game-breaking changes isn’t used again in that game and he never thinks to try and use it to force log people out or give himself infinite life so he can just rush the game and free everyone. nope, convert a corpse into an item and then never think about it again.

there’s an entire episode where all they do is go fishing. its the only filler episode in the season, and it immediately follows the death of a small child. it’s the most tone-deaf beach episode in writing history

it turns out this game, this game where they didn’t bother coding in any difference races, weapons, or any kind of magic system, was intended to have fully sentient AI therapists, because why the fuck not at this point honestly

oh also the game has PVP and you can trick the game into thinking a sleeping player is in PVP with you in order to actually murder a real person without it flagging in-game as a murder making the crime impossible for the real life legal system to investigate even though you just murdered a person. and they expect us to believe this game had actual beta testers. at least cyberpunk wasn’t played on microwaves you connected straight to your brain (also not a joke, the VR consoles canonically work by sending microwave radiation into your brain, no wonder VR never caught on)

the set up for the show is that they have to reach level 100 of a dungeon in order to win. At level 75, the writers got bored and the show just ends.

it turns out the power of love allows you to just break the fucking game and the main villain literally has a line about how ‘love allows you to remove debuffs, huh, we didn’t think to plan for that’ because again, there’s no metaphors in this show, everything is 100% literal including the fact that falling in love with another player means you’re immune to the paralysis status effect

power of love also allows you to very briefly become a poltergeist after being killed, but only for like 2 seconds. again not a joke or a metaphor, main character is killed but then gets to hang around as a ghost for a little bit to enable him to defeat the boss. he also doesn’t die in real life despite that being the entire fucking premise of the show, again because power of love.

the bad guy literally has no plan, he’s just doing shit for the sake of having something to do. His actions directly cause the deaths of more than 4,000 people, and it’s not even in aid of anything. they ask him why he trapped 10,000 people in an MMO and allowed them to slowly die, and he’s just like ‘huh, i forgot i did that, random’ and then just fucking peaces out

the fact that he committed one of the largest mass killings outside of war never really comes up again, as far as we know he doesn’t even go to jail. i think the show actually kind of thinks he’s a good guy, which is a fucking WILD moral stance to take on the deaths of 4000 completely innocent people for absolutely no reason

If this sounds hilari-bad but you don’t want to invest the time to watch a show which is objectively garbage, it has an abridged series which is famously better than the show it’s parodying (i’m dead serious, people have character arcs, the getting married after one date thing is properly addressed, the mc has to deal with PTSD because of all his friends dying in epsidode 3, they don’t immediately follow the death of a child with an extended fishing montage, the villain has an actual plan). It’s mostly actually pretty good, but this is the internet and it’s an abridged series, so while there are a lot fewer yikes moments than most it still has enough that I’m not comfortable recommending it without the caveat. that said I still enjoyed it a lot, although possibly not at much as pointing and laughing at the garbage that is the actual show.

[hopelessly-me]

Spooky prompt: avengers pumpkin carving contest

LISA HI! Omg- this one turned into feelings. I was originally going to write it to be a silly, crack type fic but then... my brain decided feelings had to be had. So here is some Bucky and Clint (with the team) goodness, and I hope you enjoy. (1689 word count)

If y'all want to send me spooky season themed prompts, I'm still open to doing them. =)

“Going to join in?” Clint asked Bucky, tilting his head over to the layers of plastic wrap on the floor constructed in a large circle, pumpkins all around.

“I… don’t know,” Bucky answered honestly.

“I’ll save you a spot, just in case,” Clint said with a wink before he walked over to the group that was assembling. Clint placed his forearm and elbow on Bruce’s shoulder, looking at the scientist and smiling.

“You know… it might not be a bad thing if you tried,” Steve pointed out. Bucky nearly jumped, not expecting Steve so close. “If you want, you can help me with my pumpkin.”

“I think I should sit this one out,” Bucky said.

He knew Steve wouldn’t push. None of them would. It was only a few months since Bucky had started his stay at the Tower and there were just some things he wasn’t ready to do just yet. Going out on Avenger mission, training with them- even holding knives could make him start to panic a little, worry that something, somewhere, deep within him would come back out. He couldn’t shake the idea that the Soldier sometimes had more control than Bucky did, and it was terrifying.

“Let me know if you change your mind,” Steve said, patting his shoulder before he walked by. “Alright guys- ready?” he asked. “FRIDAY, are you taping this?” Steve asked.

“Of course, Captain,” the AI system said.

“Alright guys, Rules for the annual Avengers pumpkin carving contest. You may only use the tools in front of you. No additional knives, no lasers- nothing.” Bucky was pretty sure Tony pouted. “We have one hour to recreate the pumpkin that auto generates on the screen. Whoever wins gets the entire month of November off from training. All agreed?”

“Agreed,” was the common response.

“Alright then. FRIDAY, the count down please,” Steve said.

A handful of months and slowly Bucky was learning about the people who stayed in the Tower nearly full time. He knew who he could go to when he needed to get his mind off of things, and who he could sit with when he just needed some quiet time. He knew who was up for the most fun, and who would really rather be alone themselves without someone nearby. But it seemed like no matter how they liked to live their lives, everyone came together for these monthly “family night” events and would just… breathe. They would all find enjoyment out of each other’s quirks and sometimes those moments transcended into their daily lives.

Still- Bucky wasn’t ready to be fully involved yet. He was still working out if he felt like he deserved it, which was harder when Tony became visibly worried of Bucky’s presence in the room, especially if he was around knives. And while Bucky knew he couldn’t take the blame for things he didn’t have control over, that didn’t mean he couldn’t take the emotions from it and hold them close.

He walked around the room and watched as everyone worked on their pumpkins. He was beginning to see who were the artistic types and who wasn’t solely based on how well their Haunted Houses turned out. Natasha might not be the best artistically but she was by the far the best with wielding a knife, although Clint was a close second. Steve was arguably the best artistically, Sam fairly good himself, but neither of them could wield the tools in front of them quite like Clint and Natasha.

“Hey,” Clint said, looking up from his pumpkin with a smile.

“Hey. Having fun?” Bucky asked.

“Eh. It’s pumpkin carving,” Clint answered honestly. “Wanna sit?” he asked. Bucky couldn’t see the harm of sitting there, so he did. “Spooky season. How do you feel about it?”

“Well.. at one time in my life I would say that there wasn’t a point to it because monsters weren’t really,” Bucky answered. “Now… that’s a hard argument to make.”

“No joke,” Clint muttered.

“What about you?” Bucky asked.

“I love everything Halloween,” Clint answered. “Magic might not be my favorite thing, but I like everything else. Corn mazes, hayrides, pumpkin spiced everything.” He was leaning over, the back of his shirt riding up as he did so. “But growing up in the circus- you get to see Halloween every day. I used to hate it for the longest time because the season reminded me of my life before SHIELD and the Avengers. Now I can kind of separate the two and go back to loving the season again. Haunted houses and all.”

Bucky knew there was a point to this conversation. Clint didn’t open up about his life before SHIELD to anyone without there being a reason. So when Bucky didn’t answer, Clint looked over at him and held the smallest of the knives out to him. Bucky looked down at his hand, covered in chipped away pumpkin and tiny little scars before he looked back up.

“You can still hate what they put you through. But you get to decide how to move forward and what you get to love again. And maybe carving pumpkins can be one of those things,” Clint said. “Your choice though.”

Bucky nodded and took the tool out of Clint’s hand and pulled the pumpkin over between them. “Never carved one before,” he admitted. “At least not that I can remember.”

“That’s okay, my pumpkin looks like shit anyway,” Clint replied.

Bucky turned it around and snorted. “Did you even try to make this a haunted house?” Bucky asked, looking at the stars and the arrows Clint had etched into the pumpkin.

“Nah. Not with the shit food I eat all the time. I need that training in my life,” Clint answered with a grin. He scooted closer to Bucky and set the rest of the tools between them. “Your move, Barnes.”

The hour passed much too quickly before the fake air horn sounded. Bucky startled and looked at the others before he looked down at the pumpkin in front of him. Arrows and stars, a moon, planets, swirls- the pumpkin he shared with Clint looked like a mess of anything and everything they could think of. Bucky glanced up at Clint, who was all smiles, leaning over and talking to Sam, checking out his pumpkin and laughing. Bucky looked back at the pumpkin and the tools that were set between them.

“You alright?” Natasha asked.

Bucky looked over, Natasha leaned over his way in one of those rare moments she was willing to extend the olive branch, just a little. “Yeah- I’m alright,” Bucky admitted, finally setting that small tool Clint had handed over down. “I… think we might have lost the contest,” he admitted.

“If it makes you feel better… Steve always wins,” Natasha said before she leaned back and away.

Each pumpkin was turned around when Steve called out to them. Thor looked mighty proud of his attempt, which wasn’t half bad if it wasn’t for the fact that half of the house looked like it had toppled over due to a misplaced cut. Tony’s and Bruce’s looked almost exactly alike- both simple in form, but to the point- Bucky wondered if it was because they could look at blueprints and space things out easily. Natasha and Sam’s looked like completely failed attempts, just like Wanda and Vision’s attempt, but none of them seemed to care.

“Alright you two- how did it go?” Steve asked, looking at Clint and Bucky.

“Ta-da!” Clint said loudly, proud of their work as he turned the pumpkin around. “I am calling this one- friendship!”

“Wow. Masterful art piece. We should encase it,” Tony taunted with a smile. “It’s very early childhood-esque. It make you feel-”

“Ew, don’t museum me. That’s what Steve is for in real museums,” Clint scolded playfully.

“Did you even attempt a haunted house anywhere in that?” Sam asked with a grin.

“Who would do haunted houses when you can do arrows?” Clint asked. He sighed dreamily and let himself fall back, Bucky’s arm reaching out quickly to prevent him from hitting the ground. “I love arrows.”

“You’re a dork,” Natasha said through a laugh.

“Honestly- is anyone surprised by bird brain and Terminator’s pumpkin?” Tony asked. There was a small chorus of no. “Alright Steve-”

Bucky watched as the team argued and bickered about who’s pumpkin was best. Clint had leaned forward again, throwing himself into the conversation, grinning and laughing with the others. Bucky looked back down at the pumpkin that Clint and him made, still trying to figure out how he felt about it until he realized that this was the closest he had been to the team since coming along. That warm feeling started to push its way in as he realized for almost an hour he was lost in something other than his thoughts, and that he was part of this small community.

Looking up, Bucky caught Steve’s eyes on him before Steve smiled and looked down at the pumpkin. Bucky nodded and smiled himself before he glanced over at the person who helped make it happen. Clint stated how he needed the training because his diet was shit. Maybe Bucky should start going to the training sessions now- needing them to help him settle into this community. Maybe he was finally ready for it.

“Rigged! This contest is rigged! Clearly my pumpkin is the best!” Steve shouted.

“Sorry Stevie- the voting has concluded,” Clint said in a very serious tone. “Brucie has the best pumpkin.” Bruce’s face was starting to turn red and Natasha had leaned over, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

“It's okay to lose sometimes, Stevie,” Tony taunted, reaching out to pick at Steve, who pushed his hands away.

��Collusion,” Steve muttered.

“Collusion,” Sam repeated in a high pitched tone, straightening up as he laughed, his hands over his stomach. The whole team was laughing now. Clint knocked over, pressing against Bucky’s side to keep himself upright. Bucky looked at him and smiled before he looked at Steve.

“Sorry Punk,” Bucky offered.

“Yeah yeah- it’s alright,” Steve said. “Happy Halloween, team.”

[hops-hunny]

Distance Makes the Heart Grow

CHAPTER 7

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Mafia Boss!Neville Longbottom x Reader

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: (Y/n) lives a normal life. But that’s the issue, it’s normal, it’s plain, and it’s growing boring. Everyday she wishes for something, anything to spice up her life. But, when her old school friend (and crush) shows up at her bakery with a new look (and what looks like a new life), what will it bring for her? Will their puppy love grow? Will his big secret lead to the end of them or will it spark a new beginning?

Warnings: mentions of insecurity

A/N: I love and hate this chapter so much

Although this trip wasn’t for leisure, Neville was doing everything to treat it like it was. No matter how busy he was with planning the current mission or even seeing what else Italy had to offer money wise, he made sure to make time for (Y/n). Everyday had been a dream come true, from softer moments down to more...intimate moments.

He hadn’t taken her all the way yet nor had he asked her to return the favor but he didn’t need her to. Spending hours upon hours between her legs was more than enough for him. The small whimpers and whiny moans that would erupt from her plagued his thoughts during all times of the day. Most of the time he’d step away to take care of himself when he did but other times when that option wasn’t available he’d pray to Merlin that his obvious hard on would just disappear. It was 50/50 with whether that’d actually work and when it didn’t? The guys would never let him forget.

Today was different though. Instead of having to split his time between preparing for the big day or spending time with his beloved he got to do both. Today was the day before they’d put their plan in action, making it the safest day to bring her to the museum considering there was no risk. Because the museum received many visitors on the daily, no one ever questioned their consistent visit. Plus, their attire often made them look like the kind of people who admired art, which wasn’t an incorrect assumption. They did appreciate art, just even more so when it was in their home or being sold to some rich idiot.

(Y/n) looked around in awe at everything around her. Everything about the museum screamed class and money. There wasn’t just art on the walls, but the ceilings had been hand painted as well. However, her eyes fixated on the glass display in the center of the room. Inside was an array of jewels of all sorts, in crowns, in rings, in earrings, but also in the most beautiful necklace she had ever seen. It had the biggest diamonds she had ever seen, connected by a white gold chain. Reading the sign she saw it belonged to a queen of a country that no longer existed and it had clearly been kept in immaculate condition over the years. A matching set of earrings set on the other side of it.

“See something you like, petal?” she jumped at the sound of the voice, turning her head slightly to smile at the man. Neville smiled back, wrapping his arms around her waist as he came behind her. His eyes lingered on the way her reflection made it seem like she was wearing the necklace. He couldn’t help but think of how beautiful she would look in it.

“No, just looking.” she responded, turning around to wrap her arms around the man’s neck. However, she couldn’t help but feel as though someone was staring at her. Looking out the corner of her eye, she saw a womanly figure facing her direction. She went to look but her attention was turned to the warm cheek on her hand. Neville leaned down, pressing his lips to hers not even trying to fight the smile growing on his lips. She kissed him back, standing on the tip of her shoes before pulling him down to her height as she giggled. He went to say something but muffled voices started to come from his ear piece.

“Sorry, it appears our time has been cut short for now. But don’t worry angel, I’ll be back as soon as I can be.” he said, placing a kiss on her lips before pulling her into a hug. Over his shoulder, (Y/n) watched as the woman from before quickly turned back to the painting in front of her, as if she wasn’t just staring at her. Perhaps it had been her imagination? Giving him one last smile she waved as the tall man began to walk away. 

Curiosity began to get the best of her, leading her to walk across the room to the woman. Looking at the painting she saw that it was indeed a beautiful painting! It showcased many people inside some sort of marble lookout point, gazing upon the sea. A gasp left her lips at the attention to detail, the wet appearance of the water, the reflection of the sun. Despite it not moving like the ones she was used to, she found that it didn’t need to be. The woman standing next to her gave her a side glance, a look on her face that she didn’t notice.

“Ti piace il dipinto?(“Do you like the painting?”)” the woman asked her, a mischievous look on her face. Gisele knew that the girl was sheltered just from her appearance. She wasn’t nearly as traveled as herself so there was no way for her to know even an inkling of what she had just asked her.

(Y/n) blinked at her, pondering what the woman had asked her before nodding. “È bellissimo. L'attenzione ai dettagli è incredibile! Non ho mai visto niente del genere.(“It's beautiful. The attention to detail is incredible! I've never seen anything like it!”)” she looked at the woman as she choked slightly, a concerned look on her face.

“You speak italian?” she asked in an offended tone, an unreadable look on her face. (Y/n) shrugged some, continuing to look at the painting.

“Not quite. I’ve only been learning for a few days. My boy- er, friend taught me but he says I’m a quick learner! I’m sorry if my translation was a bit off.” she said, offering the woman a kind smile. The woman’s eye twitched at the information, growling slightly. But, she remembered she had some “information” of her own.

“You mean Neville?” the strange woman asked, causing her to look up. She nodded slowly, offering her another kind smile.

“Do you know him?” she asked.

“Know him? Ha!” she sighed dramatically, putting a freshly manicured hand over her ample chest. “We were practically married! He and I were seeing each other for such a long time. I’m assuming you’re dating then?” she smirked to herself, watching as the girl shook her head no. “No? Well I guess that isn’t too shocking. I mean, why date a knock off when the real thing is still available. Oh! Where are my manners? I’m Gisele Bardot, Europe’s one and only top model.” (Y/n) felt her throat grow tight as she swallowed harshly. Neville had never once brought up Gisele to her. In fact, he had even gone as far as to say he hadn’t dated anyone, saving his heart for her. 

“Knock off? What do you mean?” she asked her innocently, blinking back the tears that were threatening to form. Perhaps it was a simple misunderstanding. However, Gisele’s cackle of a laugh told her otherwise.

“Oh honey, are you really that naive? Look at you, you’re a lesser version of myself. Do you really think that’s a coincidence?” she stated as if it was a face. She took the time to look at Gisele and realized she was right. Gisele had all the same features of her, but better. Higher cheekbones, fuller lips, her hair was healthier. And when it came to her body? (Y/n) could only dream of a chest as nice as hers with a stomach so flat, so toned. Was it a coincidence or was Neville really using her as a replacement for what he couldn’t have. “Poor thing, anyone with eyes could see-”

“Could see what?” Twyla seethed, placing an arm around her shoulder as she walked up to the two. (Y/n) felt relieved from the familiar face, wiping the tears that had fallen from her eyes, much to her efforts of trying to get them to not do so. “What business do you have with my friend?”

“We were just chatting! Right..” her eyes widened at the fact she didn’t know the girl’s name. Twyla smirked, giving her an expectant look.

“Go on, what’s her name?” Twyla asked in a fake concerned tone. As the model stood there gaping, mouth opening and closing like a fish, the blonde scoffed, grabbing (Y/n) as she dragged her off.

“Come on (Y/n), we don’t associate with trash. Especially not trash wearing grandma’s pearls and perfume.” she turned around once more, looking her up and down. “It’s a good thing you’re a model because you sure don’t know how to dress.” and with that they were off, walking out to the garden of the museum. When they got there, the taller girl looked at the (e/c) eyed girl, a concerned look present on her face. “What was that? I don’t like her, she gives me bad vibes. Not like, sinister, just...petty. I’ve seen her in those magazines and stuff. What’s her name? Gizette?”

“Gisele. Apparently she was Neville’s....Neville’s ex girlfriend.” tears began to fall from her eyes as she sobbed softly, falling forward into her friend’s chest. Without hesitation, the blonde wrapped her arms around her, hugging her close. “She essentially said that I’m just a replacement for the real thing which is her and, it must be true! I mean just look at her, she’s gorgeous Twyla! Runway gorgeous. She’s an international model and I’m..I’m just me.”

“Oh honey, I hate to ruin this heart to heart, actually this is an awful heart to heart, but she’s definitely lying! I’ve seen the way Neville looks at you and so has everyone else. I’ve got this feeling that he’s lying and you know me with my feelings, they’re always right.” (Y/n) looked up at her, sniffling some as Twyla wiped at her runny makeup with her tissue. “Plus, that easily could be the other way around. How do you know she wasn’t just a replacement for you?” she froze at her words. She was right, it very well could be the other way around. How would she know unless she asked? As if she read her mind, the next words aligned with her thoughts perfectly. “You know, there’s only one thing to do.”

“Ask him about it?” she gulped at the thought. Neville had been nothing but kind to her since they reconnected. She had nothing to be scared about. Whether it was learning the truth or Neville himself she feared she didn’t know. Or, at least she didn’t wanna admit which one it was.

“Oh..I was gonna say find this bitch and replace her shampoo with nair. You know, maybe even give her some of that tea my aunt gave to her husband.” Twyla shrugged, leaning back some with a sigh. “Buut, that’s good too.”

(Y/n) gave the girl a questionable look. “Twy….didn’t your aunt use that tea to kill her husband?” the girl nodded, sitting up as she dusted herself off.

“Yeah. Your point?” Before she could respond, Neville came running up to the two of them with a smile. As he placed a peck on her lips, she gave him a weak smile.

“Hi, love. I missed you.” he said, a dopey lovesick smile on his face. He cleared his throat, ears tinted cheeks. “I-I was wonderin’ if uh, you’d like to go on a date with me tomorrow. You know, after the mission.” her eyes widened as she felt her face grow fuzzy. A date? She was sure he had something worse to say, especially after the fiasco from earlier. ‘Gisele must’ve not been able to find him.’

“I’d love to! I’ve never been on a date before.” she answered honestly, giving him a smile. “I can’t wait.” he looked surprised as she accepted, picking her up as he spun her around before setting her back down gently. Placing a peck on her lips, he stroked her cheek.

“Fantastic. Oh I can’t wait. I’m going to spoil you on our date tomorrow,” he leaned near her ear, resting his hands on her rear, “And tonight too. How’s bout you sit on my face again, yeah?” she nodded shyly, looking down at their shoes. Neville chuckled some, walking away before another pair of men’s dress shoes stopped in front of her. Looking up she saw Seamus who gave her a small smile.

“Don’t worry mini boss, I kept that stupid woman away from him.” her eyes widened as she went to speak. “How’d I know? I could tell something was up and plus I saw her enter as we were leaving. Thought she’d try something. Whatever she said wasn’t true.” He patted her back (a bit too roughly..) as he offered her a thumbs up. “But, I know you’d still probably rather hear that from him.”

“You know Finnigan, for someone who acts so stupid you’re kinda smart sometimes.” Twyla said, giggling as she intertwined her hands with Draco. Draco offered her a nod to which she returned before beginning to walk off with the rest of them. She smiled when she saw Neville waiting for her by the door, hand outstretched with the same look he’d always give her. As they got in the car, she watched as the beautiful buildings passed them in the distance. It was then she decided.

She’d ask him, no matter how scared she was of the answer. Neville was sure to give her an honest one, but was it the one she wanted to hear?

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[much-obliged-timothy]

So I was reading a fanfic for a different fandom where a character ends up the single father of an oops baby and...

Anyway, here’s a totally self-indulgent “what if Tim accidentally had a child” fic ft. Rhys accidentally befriending the kid and being very panicked about it (and yes I will be more than happy to write more of this weird AU if anyone wants to read it)

Rhys paced his office nervously. “Zer0, did I make a mistake? Oh my god. I can’t believe I agreed to employ a doppelganger of Handsome Jack.”

The vault hunters had contacted him with an absolutely bizarre story. While invading Handsome Jack’s casino, they’d found his sole surviving doppelganger, a man named Timothy Lawrence. Timothy had been all too eager to get out of the casino once they’d claimed it for themselves, but had nowhere to go and, they’d warned, was lacking a bit in his social skills after seven years of being locked in a casino where almost everyone wanted him dead. 

Still, the man had apparently proved highly adept at business when they needed help getting issues for the casino sorted. Moxxi thought he’d be an asset to Rhys, appearances aside.

Rhys had them send over a resume and some examples of Timothy’s work, and was surprised to find that Tim was actually highly skilled at business negotiations and research. He had experience helping Hyperion develop new weapons and other various tech, and had worked as a vault hunter for Jack at one point, giving him valuable combat experience.

So Rhys had agreed to take him on, at least on a trial period to see how things went. Today was the day Tim would arrive, and Rhys couldn’t stop fretting that Tim would be too similar to Jack to bear. 

“He helped Jack rise to power, they said,” Rhys babbled, his anxiety growing. “What if he’s just like Jack? I don’t think I can take that ego again. This is such a mistake!”

Zer0 watched him pace, but offered no comfort. He didn’t seem to have any concerns over the situation. 

There was a knock on the door and Rhys froze, shooting a look at Zer0. Zer0 touched his gun then gestured to the door, a silent assurance that he would handle it if things got out of hand.

Rhys didn’t enjoy the thought of anyone being shot in his office, but he enjoyed the thought of being protected from Handsome Jack 2.0. “Come in.”

The door swung open and in came Handsome Jack. Rhys stared at his face for a long moment before shaking himself. Tim’s hair was longer than Jack’s, the mask on his face cracked. He had a cybernetic hand that was fidgeting with the visitor badge pinned to his jacket. He certainly had Jack’s sense of how to dress for the job; he wore jeans and a hoodie with a jacket over it instead of anything dressy.

Tim noticed Rhys eyeing his clothes and shifted awkwardly. “Uh, sorry. No money to buy anything nicer right now. I’m Timothy Lawrence. I know the mask has to go, too, but I’m arranging to have these stupid clips removed with it.”

Rhys processed his words, but only distantly. When Tim had shifted, he’d revealed that he wasn’t alone.

Tim again noticed where Rhys’s gaze went, and fidgeted more with his pass. “So, the job? Moxxi got me set up with a place to live nearby for now. I just moved in yesterday, so I’m ready to start whenever you need me to.”

Rhys continued staring. He had not been informed that Tim wouldn’t be coming alone.

Tim sighed quietly and nudged the little boy out from behind his legs. The boy stared distrustfully at Rhys, clutching a tattered teddy bear with the Hyperion logo on its stomach to himself. 

“This is my son, Phoenix,” Tim explained. “I, uh, don’t exactly have a sitter. Hard to have contacts when you’ve been locked in a casino for seven years.”

Obviously Tim had found a way to pass the time. The boy couldn’t be any older than five or six, with skin a few shades darker than Tim’s, messy, ruddy hair, a splattering of freckles over his cheeks and nose, and hazel eyes. His left eye had a familiar strip of blue amongst the hazel.

“You said I get my own office? Can I see it?” Tim said, shooting Rhys a pleading look.

“Oh, um, right, yes,” Rhys said, fixing his already straight tie. 

“Hey, stay here. We’ll be right back,” Tim said.

The boy’s eyes widened in terror, but Tim smiled and ruffled his hair. Phoenix clutched at Tim’s jacket.

“I’ll be right back,” Tim repeated. “That guy there? He was a vault hunter, just like I was. He’ll keep an eye on you for a few minutes.”

Phoenix looked over his shoulder at Zer0. His curiosity seemed to win out over his distrust as he eyed Zer0.

Tim took the opportunity to slip out of the room, Rhys following. They walked in awkward silence until they reached the office Rhys had secured for Tim.

“Okay,” Tim said, shutting the door as soon as they were inside. “Look, I kinda had a, uh, thing with a friend named Ember. We’d been stuck in that casino for a while at that point and everyone was trying to kill me and we just- got careless a few times. Phoenix was born in that damned place. He lived his whole life in there, hidden between me, Ember, and a friend of Ember’s from the vice district. Ember told me to take him with me to Promethea so he could experience life in the real world. Not that this shithole planet is fancy living, but-” He stopped and groaned. “Sorry, injected with Jack’s DNA. Anyways, please, he’s scared to be alone.”

No one had warned Rhys that in addition to getting a traumatized employee, he’d be getting the man’s traumatized son as well. But what was he going to do? Turn him out onto the streets?

Rhys sighed quietly. He hated kids, mostly because he had no idea how to talk to them and they frightened him.

“He can’t go into meetings with you,” he said at last.

Tim looked so relieved that Rhys didn’t even regret the decision. “Thank you. Really, thank you. Oh, finally, a CEO who isn’t an absolute dick. He’s no trouble, really. He’ll stay in my office with me, and he thinks everyone wants to kill him so it’s not like he’ll go bothering anyone.”

At Rhys’s startled look, Tim grimaced. He touched his mask and shrugged.

“Look, I’m not going to lie. My kid is…” He cursed softly. “I didn’t want that for him. But I had no choice. I started teaching him about guns when he was three. We taught him how to hide, and not to trust anyone. It was the only way we could keep him safe. It’s going to take time to break him of all that. B-But I’m a good worker! I won’t make you regret this! Well, I mean, the occasional Jack moments probably will, but other than that, no regrets. I hope.”

This was too much to handle right now. “You need to go get fingerprinted downstairs. Then we’ll get you settled and go over your schedule and duties.”

Business. He could do business. He couldn’t do a traumatized Handsome Jack doppelganger with a paranoid son.

“Right, let me just go let Phoenix know,” Tim said, opening the office door.

“That’s a cool name,” Rhys said as they started along the hallway.

Tim shrugged again. “Ember wanted something with fire. I guess we thought it was fitting, since he was born in the wake of Jack’s death and my, uh, sort of freedom. I mean, I still had a bomb in my face and was trapped in a casino. But no more Jack ordering me about.”

He at least didn’t sound bothered by Jack’s death, so Rhys took some comfort in the fact that Tim appeared not to hold any loyalty to his former boss. Moxxi had claimed Timothy hated Jack, but Rhys was still worried after everything he’d been through with the AI Jack. 

They stepped back into Rhys’s office, and Phoenix was immediately back at his father’s side, clutching Tim’s jacket in one hand and his bear in the other. Tim squeezed his shoulder and gently pried his hand off.

“I need to go get fingerprinted, Phoenix,” he said. “I’m just going to be right downstairs.”

The kid looked torn. Rhys felt a flash of pity.

“It should only be fifteen minutes if they’re not busy,” he said. Maybe knowing how long Tim would be gone would calm the kid.

“Fifteen minutes,” Tim said, smiling. “That’s nothin’, pal. I take longer in the shower.”

“You take forever in the shower,” Phoenix said, but grabbed Tim’s jacket again. 

Once again, Tim gently pried his hand away. “Fifteen minutes, pal. Then I’ll be back.”

Phoenix watched his father leave the room and began to pace silently, keeping Rhys, Zer0, and the door in view as he did so. He was rubbing the band of a watch strapped to his wrist, far too big for him. Rhys realized it was a digistruct watch, and sat down in the hopes he wouldn’t spook the kid into summoning whatever was stored in there. 

Phoenix kept shooting a look to Rhys’s cybernetic arm, looking like he wanted to say something. He kept snapping his eyes back to the door, but his gaze would drift back to the arm.

Rhys finally held it up. “It’s, uh, it’s an Atlas cybernetic. State of the art.”

“Dad has one,” he said, holding up his hand. “He lost his hand in the casino.”

“That’s because Handsome Jack is a controlling asshole,” Rhys said, then snapped his mouth shut. Shit, could he swear in front of kids? Was that legal?

But Phoenix stared at him, slowing his pacing. “You knew him?”

“Sort of,” Rhys said, rubbing the back of his neck. “We...worked together? Sort of? He tried to kill me. Not a good time.”

The distrust on his face evaporated a little. “He locked my mom and dad in the casino. Dad said he’s a freaking asshole. But I’m not s’posed to call anyone else that word.” He pointed to his eye with the sliver of blue in it. “Dad said that was Jack’s last ‘screw you’.” 

Rhys stared at Zer0 for help. He hadn’t expected to shit talk Jack with a little kid today, and wasn’t sure what to do now that it had started.

“Much more lively now/He must like you a lot Rhys/You have made a friend,” Zer0 said.

“You talk funny,” Phoenix said.

“He speaks in haikus,” Rhys explained. “Well, mostly.”

Phoenix frowned. “I dunno that language. My mom speaks French.”

Rhys laughed in surprise. “Oh, no, it’s not a language. It’s a type of poetry.”

“Oh,” Phoenix said, then shrugged in a movement that perfectly mimicked Tim’s. 

Rhys couldn’t help but stare a little as the boy resumed his pacing. He wondered if any of his features had been inherited from Tim’s original appearance. He wondered if it was hard for Tim to look at his kid and see both himself and Jack in him. 

Rhys busied himself with paperwork to keep from staring any longer. However, as fifteen minutes passed, and then another five, and then even more, Phoenix’s pacing grew faster.

He rubbed at the band of his watch more, eyes locked on the door. He looked terrified, checking the time yet again and hugging his bear tighter.

“They were probably just busy,” Rhys said, because as much as he didn’t like kids, he felt bad seeing one break down right in front of him. “He’s okay.”

“What if he’s dead?” His voice cracked a little and he paced even faster, clutching the bear so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

Rhys got up and slowly approached. “Hey. Hey, Phoenix. It’s safe here, okay? No one here will hurt him. I promise.”

“But he looks like that freaking asshole!” Phoenix said, pointing at his eye again.

“I know, but I warned my people he’d be coming today. They all know he isn’t really Jack. No one is going to hurt your dad,” Rhys assured. Phoenix still looked scared and frantic, so Rhys tried a different approach. He held his cybernetic hand out and let an image come up in his palm. “Have you ever seen a skag before?”

Phoenix nodded his head, looking torn between watching the door and looking at the holographic image. “Uh-huh. But just one.”

Rhys let the holograph play out. “Look how they run! I got stuck on Pandora years ago, and these things were scary.”

“Pandora?” He tugged at the ear of his bear. “Dad said it’s a shithole. I’m not s’posed to say that, though. Mom gets mad and says dad has a dirty mouth.”

“It kind of is a shithole,” Rhys agreed. “Promethea is much better. I think you’ll like it here. You and your dad can explore this weekend when he’s not working.”

His eyes shot to the door again. “But he’s not back!”

“He’ll come back,” Rhys said. “I won’t let anyone hurt him while he’s here. I promise.”

His eyes widened and he looked at Rhys. He seemed torn between distrust and hope.

The matter was settled as Tim reappeared in the room, looking out of breath. “Sorry. Some freaking idiot down there couldn’t find her ID and held up the whole line. I- Umph!”

Phoenix launched himself at Tim, wrapping his little arms around Tim’s waist tightly. There were tears silently rolling down his cheeks.

“Hey, hey.” Tim knelt down and hugged him, kissing his head. “I’m okay. I’m right here, pal. I’m okay. I’m sorry I took so long.”

He stood up with Phoenix in his arms, running gentle fingers through his messy hair. Phoenix nuzzled his head against Tim’s neck, wiping at his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Tim said, kissing him again. “I have shitty time management skills. Oops, don’t tell your mom I swore again.”

Phoenix put an arm around Tim’s neck to hold onto him. “Dad, this guy showed me a skag. On his hand!”

“‘This guy’ is my boss,” Tim said. “A skag, huh? Can’t say I missed Pandora’s brand of cannon fodder creatures.”

“You and me both,” Rhys said, standing up.

“Can you show dad?” Phoenix said, pointing to Rhys’s hand. “They look so stupid.”

Rhys brought up the image again. With his dad safely back with him, Phoenix was much more interested, peering at it with curious eyes.

Tim wiggled the fingers of his cybernetic hand. “Yea, mine doesn’t do that. Cool, though.”

“One of the vault hunters who saved us had a skag,” Phoenix said. “And a...a...something else.”

“Jabber. You saw their jabber,” Tim said. “Shit-flinging, obnoxious beasts.”

Phoenix tightened his hold on Tim. “You’re not s’posed to swear, dad.” He gave Tim the hint of a grin. “Gotta shut me up.”

“Ice cream it is,” Tim said with a long sigh. “After work, though. I’ve got to earn money to afford to bribe you, pal. So, let’s get on with it, Rhys.”

Rhys took Tim and showed him around a bit before bringing him back to his office. As Tim had assured, Phoenix was quiet the whole time, just clinging to Tim. When they reached the office, he sat in a chair in the corner, playing with his tattered bear and not bothering either man as they went over Tim’s schedule and duties.

“Well, I’ll leave you to get settled in and do the basic paperwork,” Rhys said, shaking Tim’s hand. “If you have any questions, you know where my office is. You’ll be primarily reporting to me.”

“Hey,” Phoenix said as Rhys headed for the door. He was clutching his bear tightly again, glancing from his dad to Rhys before blurting out, “Can you tell me about Pandora sometime?”

“Oh,” Rhys said in surprise. “Yea, sure. I mean, a lot of my experience involves me being in fear for my life. But, sure.”

“Hey, been there done that on Elpis, kiddo,” Tim said. “Phoenix, let him get back to work. You can help me get some papers organized, if you want.”

Phoenix hopped off the chair. “M’kay, dad. See ya, boss guy.”

Rhys left the office and stared at the door once he’d closed it. Today had not gone as he’d expected, not at all. And he had a sinking feeling he’d accidentally made the kid like him.

Great. He’d been so worried about dealing with a Handsome Jack doppelganger, and now his bigger problem was a small, curious child. Rhys wondered if life would ever let him catch a break.

Part 2

[spinjitzuladykaia]

imagine this however you want

[shortyisweird9]

'Lonely ghost serie'

Chek and heartache- part III

Tw⚠️:swearing, referring of dark themes such as suicide attempt and mental illness.

The morning rays hit your eyes gently, tangible by their warmth,as you forced yourself from another dream of nothing but blank.

You groaned as your cat,Didi, comes running towards you: purring, meowing and chirping in pure happiness. You knew the reason she does this; your previous cat, Martha or Dildo- your roommate Sergiu called her that because of her dickish attitude with him- used to do this everytime so the little one, Didi, just followed her mother's lead.

Everytime she does that is like a small needle stabs at your heart especially when just 2 weeks passed since Martha died of old age- the black cat was adopted when she was senior, abused and malnourished, your heart knew you couldn't leave her to be laid to rest like a nothing. You adopted her, she bit you and you petted her, she hissed you hugged her, you did everything you could think of to show love even brush her fur with a wet toothbrush end to mimic sweet kisses coming from her mom. The cat soon realized that and started living again. Cautious of your other 3 roommates, cuddly with you.

Anyway, you got sidetracked with reminiscing. You heard your friends in the kitchen, Sabrina throwing away the take out boxes and Sergiu preparing some tea, probably to calm his stomach after all the spicy curry he ate last night.

You fixed the oversized white t-shirt and pull the marine blue shorts out of your bottoms, Didi already waiting you by the door.

You all, Sabrina,Sergiu,Ace and you, live in a quaint apartment, turned from campus housing, right next to one of the malls of the city. It had two small bathrooms, a living room , three petite bedrooms ,a tiny kitchen, a rounded balcony and a hallway. It was much smaller than your family home but it was in a central zone where your family home was outside the city's boundaries. You chose it not only because you wanted to spare your family from driving you to university but also because you needed your freedom, your space. Your parents were very understanding of that.

-Y/n e trează? ( "Is Y/n awake?") Ace asked as he sipped on his black cofee.

Without, he would pretty much be a grumpy hedgehog with spiky tealish mohawk. And who wouldn't love that?

-Nu încă, ah! Uite-o! ("Not yet,ah! There she is") Sabrina exclaimed, getting up to hug you and leaving the smoking tea cup by the window.

"Hello." You said ,voice grungy and eyes shut from the light.

You felt the warm hands of your Arabic friend on your face filled with moles and couple of marks from recently popped pimples, you let yourself be engrossed into it ,the touch starvation you carry like a cross chosing for you.

You hear her laugh, she always had a pretty laugh and a prettier smile . She was the beauty of the group, with big puffy sand yellow curls, brown skin with red undertones and black eyes who glow in pure happiness. She was stunning and a sweetheart with an obsession on the colour red and butterflies.

"Someone is needy." Ace teased.

"Shut up or I will staple those hair triangles on your scalp. "

You wanted to say something better but Sabrina then started massaging your lower face in a circular manner with her thumb. You knew you couldn't do anything anymore except melt.

-Anyway ,unde e Sergiu? ("Anyway, where is Sergiu?")

-Ți-o făcut ceai, cane e pervaz. S-o dus până sus să o ajute pe Florentina.("He made you tea, the cup is on the windowsill. He went upstairs to help Florentina.") He said, taking another sip of his cup.

-Ooooh, Florentina. You two began as Ace shook his head in amusement.

You and Sabrina were known to be ruthless in your teasing of the guitarist with long brown locks and beard.

Florentina was a crush of his, a freshman in the University of Arts who played the violin beautifully. Small,with olive skin, long red hair keept in a 1960s hairstyle and green petite with a triangular shaped face. She was a sweetie with a love for fantasy book ,autumn and ferrets.

-Oh, yeah?

-Dup, iubitul ei se mută cu ea. ("Yup, her boyfriend moves in with her")

-Oh.

Ace sucked in his lip ,his face filled with disappointment just like theirs now.

-That sucks.

-Numai spune,Sabrina.("You don't say,Sabrina")

Just then, the door clicked shut. Sergiu is back, this will be awkward.

-Ce vă uitați așa la mine?("Why are you looking at me like that?")

Neither of them could properly looked into the warm brown eyes of the man whose glow seemed to fade a bit, Sergiu was a stubborn man who shut his feelings deep inside, only through his song you could tell he was suffering. Just like you, I suppose.

-Am auzit...("We heard...")

You bit your lips as your long fingers played with each other, twisting and tugging while your nerves grew. Last thing you wanted was another fight where you all force the man to open up. He had suicidal tendencies, sometimes he came too close to actually do it but you were there and you needed to be there now too, even if he doesn't like being taking care of.

Sergiu rolled his eyes at you, his heart hurt from how rigid your posture was, eyes were worried about him but also scared, teeth grinding themselves not out of anger but out of care and fear.

He knew you hated arguments and shouts with dying passion. You always cried when someone raised their voice in less than friendly manner, you hated this reaction of complete terror, you hated looking weak but now you hated letting your friend burn himself because of an unfortunate love triangle. So you swallowed your nerves and braved on, it's about him ,not you.

Sergiu wanted to protect you all from this negativity, especially you and Ace. You had a big event to organise , Ace's sex reassignment surgery is coming up soon. You both have your own problems to dwell ,you didn't need to have him as one too.

However somewhere in his head, a voice telling him that he was wrong ,that voice that took the shape of you in the night of July.

You were crying, your grey hoodie wet from the rain as you cling desperately to him, not daring to move.

He was the reason why you crying, why you yelled profanities our of worry for what he was about to do. He...He tried to throw himself off a bridge ,the same bridge you two first shared your kiss.

That dark episode still irked your minds in the darker moments, late in the night nothing but your mind to keep you company and that's torture in itself.

You thought you could help him, change whatever hurts him and make it go away. That was your biggest mistake, you can't change a person that's not your duty , your duty was to support them through tough times and help them see the light at the end of the dark tunnel. A duty you solemnly swore to uphold even if he didn't liked you to. There's no fucking way you let him do that again,not if you can be there for him. Like he was always there for you, your big guardian with a guitar that spews flames in shape of songs.

-Y/n..

-Te rog, Sergiu. Nu ascunde. ("Please, Sergiu. Don't hide.")

Your eyes were desperate for him to talk it out in any shape or form. They implore for him to vent, to not hid between fake lies like " I am okay" or "I'm fine."

-Bine,bine. Tu ești șefa. ("Fine,fine. You're the boss.")

————————————————————

They talked and talked and cried and laughed and cried again. A never ending circle of venting ,small earthquakes which instead of fracturing the friendship , it onlyakes it stronger as it should.

-Te simți mai bine?("You feeling better?") Your voice ran timidly on the top of your apartment building, watching over the brutalist styled architecture.

-Un pic, doare știi dar asta îmi arată cât de îndrăgostit sunt de ea. Iubirea adevărată pentru mine nu se referă doar la a iubi doar dacă te iubește reciproc, nu , să iubești fără să forțezi persoană să te iubească înapoi. Să îi porți de grijă, să o protejezi, să o ajuți fără să fi un egoist, fără să te aștepți să fi iubit înapoi. ("A little, it hurts you know but this shows how much I love her. True love for me doesn't mean to love just so they will love you back, no, to love someone without forcing them to love you back. To care for them, to protect them, to help them without being an egotistic, to love without expecting to be loved back.")

-Poetic.

He laughed at that , starring at the setting sun ,his lit cigar forgotten fumed between his painted fingers. His hair blown gently by the wind , he looked like a masterpiece.

-Scuze..pentru tot.("Sorry...for everything. ")

-N-ai de ce. Mi-ai făcut chec până la urmă așa că balanța eternă este restabilită.("You don't have a reason to be. You made me chek in the end and thus the eternal balance is restored.") You joked, munching quietly on the piece of cake, his jacket keeping you warm.

-Haha. Cine ar fi crezut că checul are fi o gustare bună când îți dai vent.("Haha. Who would have thought that chek will be a good snack when you vent.")

Indeed, who would have thought of that but one who cried in the sore days filled with heart ache.

————————————————————

Hey,guys!💖

Hope you like the third part of the serie, I wanted to focus on "your life" and your friends backgrounds this time. The translations are not 100% word to word but enought to give you context.

Anyway, I hope you like it. Stay safe!

Tagged 💗💗:@moolujk @gaysludge @simonsbluee @yoyoanaria @cherry-piee @magenta-skyline @yikesyikesyikes95

[oneweekoneband]

her Nebraska (1982)

In July I flew to Massachusetts with a plague on, and I felt that it was wrong, but my mother had begged and I’d been out of work for months. Mornings there I ran in long, uneven ovals on the same roads I’d memorized in high school. There’s no sidewalks, but the few feet of dirt between the craggy pavement and the open mouths of the fields serve all right for a single body in motion. When a truck comes up close from behind, the ground shakes, and I step away bouncingly from the street toward thigh-high yellow weeds and grass, and keep going. I was slowly picking my way back in that dirt, sweat-slick from only a plodding couple of miles in peak summer heat, and sucking the wet cotton of my mask in between my teeth on every inhale, when Taylor Swift announced she was releasing a surprise album produced by the guy from The National. Not the guy from The National, like, the voice, but the guy from The National whose photo was circulated on Twitter earlier this year as some kind of antifa super soldier, which isn’t the case, but would’ve been rad. First, I stopped dead to send some outraged, misspelled text messages, and then I ran home faster than I’d moved in years.

Tall, blonde, patrician pop star Taylor Swift is to me something like a cross-between a wife and a boogeyman. Bound we’ve been since we were really children. Time and its changes haven’t rid me of her, and what’s worse is I have never quite been able to wish they would, though I claim as much all the time. Countless hours of my one wild and precious life have been spent on endlessly analyzing the minutiae of Taylor Swift’s music, the mind that made it, the real world events which influenced it. And though all the while I have known she is only a person, and that people, while each strange and lovely in their own ways, are, in the end, mostly dull, needful in just the regular manner, the fantasy is better, the sick dream of a megalomaniac songstress, curious, thrilling, probably evil, and I choose that. I don’t know Taylor Alison Swift, born to this world in, I presume, the usual way. But my Taylor Swift? I’m a renowned expert. I’ve always eaten up stories—movies, music, celebrity news, the one my grandfather tells about falling off his bike once in Ireland as a boy and his face “cracking open like an egg”—like a starved dog. I’m obsessive about my interests, but not inclined to intense fandom, and certainly not fandom in the mode of the stan. For one, I’m too self-absorbed. But caring intensely for a famous person is falling in love with a ghost, and that’s all right—I mean, what the hell? We’re here together just dying... Let’s enjoy—but is an affair best undertaken with the knowledge that everyone alive has their own complex interiority, as unruly as your own, and that you, a stranger, are not in any real way connected to the lawless, blurry middle of that celebrity, and will never be. It’s freeing and fun to know this. I mean, these people are basically in your employ. Glamorous dollhouse dwellers. Acknowledging that uncrossable distance allows for a different, healthier closeness of pure imagination. My feelings, then, can comfortably be at once both fiercely intense and entirely silly. I am a foremost scholar in the art of the Taylor Swift who exists in my head. The real person raised in Pennsylvania I don’t know at all. I have some conjectures on the matter, and, as with all my conjectures, every hackneyed theory, each picky little opinion, I’m sure they’re perfect, brilliant, just absolutely right, but that’s still all they are. Taylor Swift, figure of the cultural imagination, is the Jodie Comer to my Sandra Oh in Killing Eve, annoying and pretty in frills, taunting me endlessly and holding us trapped together in a dance of most enchanting death. But the real Taylor Swift has favorite bed sheets and a social security number and a British boyfriend, none of which I have any desire to know about, and if I saw her at a restaurant I’d politely avert my eyes before, yes, dive-bombing the group text. There’s nobody on Earth I’d stand in line to speak to, but then I’ve been speaking to a certain figment of Taylor Swift for nearly half my life.

I went to a Taylor Swift concert the night before I moved into college in 2009. My father’s work friend, firefighter by day, near professional gambler by night, got comped tickets to the Fearless Tour stop taking place at the nearby casino, and he let me have them as a reward, mainly, for happening to be seventeen. Live in-person and performed acoustically, “Fifteen” made me cry. A few years after that, in the thick, sticky part of my first post-college summer, I wrote approximately twenty-three million words about her in these very pages.  (”Pages”) At that point, Taylor’s most recent release was 2012’s Red, and the work I produced that long ago July about Taylor and her career, writing I was fairly pleased with at the time, feels now, besides just being extremely clearly written by a twenty-one year old, strange to me for the way it favors the sweet over the sour almost uniformly. There is a wholesome kind of ardor in that writing which maybe I’ve outgrown the ability to hold. Or maybe Taylor just proceeded to spend the next half a decade plus releasing one bad single after another, and it was taste—and trespasses against taste—and not some shift in my nature which altered the tenor of our bond. I have real love for my particular image, gleaned from public statements and published art, of smart, bizarre famous woman Taylor Swift, and I admire the bulk of her output very much. I’m just no longer so inclined to fawn. This is not to say I am here to offer a Taylor Swift hate screed. I couldn’t swing it, and, anyway, I’m not a pop feminist-for-hire circa 2010. But we’re older now. Things are different. At twenty-eight, twenty-nine this month—Taylor will, also this December, turn thirty-one—I regard Taylor Swift warily, like an ex with whom you have a tentative friendship, perpetually on the brink of falling one way or the other into hatred or delight, only to wobble back the opposite direction again at the slightest provocation, but still, despite best efforts, even, I regard her all the time. 

folklore was released at midnight on July 24th 2020, but I was at a cabin in rural Vermont without Internet or cell service. I drank Bud Light seltzers with my mother while watching the eerie pandemic return of Major League Baseball, and when I got into a strange bed there I stewed, knowing there were people out in the world all over who were hearing Taylor Swift songs I never had, and that this was a fundamental wrong, a disruption in the balance of the universe. I listened to it the next morning in a Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot. 

And folklore is great. That’s the terrible thing. Slightly less great, maybe, than some people have insisted, tricked, I think, by just the pronounced shift in sound. But it’s great. A little gift I asked for a thousand times and was still surprised to get, like a wife who didn’t expect her henpecked husband to ever follow through and buy the paraffin wax hand bath as-see-on-TV. For years, I’ve been halfheartedly insisting that Taylor had a great album in her. I’d say it even, perhaps especially, while she stubbornly fed me gruel. Or worse, gruel with the occasional whiff of something better. With a ripe, little raspberry dropped into the slop. The bright, villainous thrill of “Getaway Car” made me believe Taylor, my Taylor, was in there somewhere under the lacquer of sequins and synth, which, while not objectionable by default, seemed a costume, and an ill-fitting one. The lived-in world of “Cornelia Street” made those old scars sting. That gay “Delicate” video. When she did “Call It What You Want” on SNL and played guitar while wearing an ugly sweater. If the abominable “ME!”, lead single off Lover, was the stick, 1989’s “Clean” was the carrot. I was Charlie Brown, and Taylor my Lucy, yanking the football back again and again. Over drinks I still yelled that Taylor Swift’s next album would be, “her Nebraska”, referring to my favorite Bruce Springsteen record, and learned to live with that egg on my face for good. I suppose I even came to like it. There was something inherently funny in taking up, like, “blind faith in the as of yet untapped greater artistic potential of massively wealthy and popular singer Taylor Swift” as my totally inane personal cause du jour, and eventually it was a bit, a gag I performed to be obstinate and didactic, but way down somewhere awful near my kidneys I meant it the whole while. And then she did it. A pandemic befell the world and amid a sea of human suffering Taylor Swift remembered she can write. She wrote, and with a massive, crucial assist from Aaron Dessner, whose music on this record is sometimes so beautiful it actually angers me, as the last thing I needed in already perilous times was to be made to try and marry my uniquely perverse emotional responses to beloved divorced dad band The National and fucking Taylor Swift,  she made an album which, if not her Nebraska, per se (I’ve come to realize that a major part of believing Taylor Swift will one day make an album I find as quietly devastating and gorgeous as Nebraska is knowing that no album will ever actually be Her Nebraska... That each will, rather, to me, be more and more evidence that it’s coming still, more proof that the limit is untouched, on and on ad infinitum, or at least until the seas take us into a place of salty peace.) is a shocking credit to all my hard-fought and deluded confidence. folklore is great. This fact has made me feel almost equally as disoriented from my understanding of the world as the time-melting COVID-19 lockdowns have, and it turned my Spotify year in review annual collective AI humiliation kink thing into a glaring indictment of my mental state, but still, I mean... It’s great.

In talking about folklore a bit this week, there are a number of specific topics I intend to cover—what a thrill it is to hear Taylor say “fuck”; Taylor’s terrifying birth chart; the astoundingly perfect bridge of “the last great american dynasty”; “because my ass is located at the back of my body”; the bit in last year’s “Lover” where deranged WASP Taylor Swift implies that to “leave the Christmas lights up til January” is some signifier of being a love-struck bohemian, when actually everyone who doesn’t employ domestic staff to take their lights down does this; how reputation is the best of the Taylor Swift records released in the latter half of the 2010s, actually, and the people who can’t see that are cowards—but intend mostly to let the muse move me where she will. Against the advice of my better angels, she—that tie-in marketing eldritch terror—always does.

[astharoshebarvon]

I never expected to see that horseshit even in Hannibal/Will pairing. I’d really thought they were exempt from that bullshit.

All I can say is that the thirst for the dominant male/ homophobia is unreal. Female Will Graham—

At this point I don’t even know whether to get angry or simply laugh at such stories. This is beyond ridiculous! Imagine being idiotic enough to even write they aren’t murder husbands, and being weird enough to put in the story, its murder husband and wife.

Please. There has never been a wife nor will there ever be. Dream on.

Thankfully, the cringeworthy self insert fics are still in double digits.

Just say you want to fuck the Dom and can’t stand that two guys love each other and are in a relationship. Literally no one wants to read about your fantasy. Go and write self-insert/OFC with the male and be happy with that. Don’t be this pathetic and try to write your fantasy in the slash ship. Keep your straight agenda to your lame het self-insert ships.

No wonder this bull even bled out to shoujo manga. That is a new low even for a shoujo. Seriously, just say you hate gay people and get out. Having the fucking audacity to write that kind of homophobic content in 2020 is shocking.

There is really no need to be that disgusting. Just write your idiotic, stupid, annoying, brainless, obsessed, creepy fangirl with the male lead and leave gay people lout of it. No need to show again and again how foul you are by bringing them in. You are literally proving what kind of a person you are by writing such crap.

I am just so disgusted by that manga that I don’t even want to remember it if I can help it. Is that how fm couples are being made these days, by being blatantly homophobic and vile/showing het superiority or downright pedophilic content. No wonder those stories never reach more than 50? 60? Ratings on amazon.

Now, if you look at Ten Count, Given, well, there ratings are in 1000 or above 500.

Please, continue being so gross, at one point only garbage people will end up buying that crap.

Mediocre shoujo writers are so fucking threatened by the popularity of BL that they are even resorting to such vile tricks.

Seeing such things just cements what I’ve always thought. People just got better at hiding their homophobia, (we needed change so we turned a boy into a girl in slash fics of the coulple ) it’s painfully obvious what you truly think when you spit out such bullshit. No need to jump through so many goddamn hoops. Hell, I am not even surprised by this behaviour.

 These are the same kind of garbage people who screamed, Yuki should return to being a girl, we don’t like male Yuki.

Shut the fuck up! Luka is literally saying they have the same soul, he can only love once. Yuki is Yuki. So called female yuki was mentioned in passing at best, got two? three ? full pages.

Luka won’t fuck you no matter how much you wish it.

The story doesn’t even have a kiss scene between the fem yuki and luka or any hets while Senshirou breaks off his engagement saying quite clearly he cares for Kuroto. The girl is thankfully not a trash person like the homophobic readers. Neither is she like the one with sairi and touko.

The whole manga revolves around present male Yuki and Luka, their relationship and other bl ships. See the fucking artworks, go and buy Phosphor, its pure BL. There is a limit to how blind or in denial a person can be. 

This manga and anime is shonen-ai, it’s always been that and will always be that. All the main couples are slash. The mangaka is famous for her BL stories.

Uraboku was published in Asuka, the magazine which is infamous for never outright saying the two males are in love and are together.

Bloody Mary, X/1999, Kyou Kara Maou are prime examples, they are all shonen ai/BL subtext. Stop trying so hard to deny the fucking truth. The author’s new work, a shoujo, was so poorly received that’s it’s not even funny. Beautiful art couldn’t save it.

Clamp literally said do not call Kamui and Fuuma as brothers. They aren’t friends. They are soulmates! They parallel Seishirou and Subaru, an established, famous MM couple. Fuuma is all Kamui thinks about.

They don’t even mention the obsessed, creepy fangirl.

They are together in Tsubasa too. Stop trying to force your heteronormative bullshit onto everyone.

 No wonder some homophobic / thirsty person had the audacity to write in the fucking wikia of that light novel, this character is not gay you know. It’s implied he might be—

He is literally saying he is gay in the story, he tells it straight to the other party. He’s been gay all these years.

And, you are still trying to push your het agenda.

I totally get where that nonsense came from. He is a very very good looking man.  You want a chance to fuck him and think this is the best way to make yourself feel good. Go and get help if you are that fucking sad of a person. This isn’t normal behaviour, it’s creepy.

You gotta be some other level of stupid if you think they are friends/brothers. Friends/siblings don’t do this with each other.

Some idiots even denied Kurogane/Fai being a subtle couple in Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. You have to be blind as a bat if you truly sat there and thought they weren’t a thing.

Even these two from get backers.

Hell, I think Get Backers author even said yes, those two guys are together. Like, please readers, take your homophobia and get out.

I have to give it to Atsuko Nakajima for drawing such beautiful illustrations. All of her works, whether they be MM, FM, FF are simply too beautiful.

  Stay mad that your imagined het only exists in your head not in actual story. Go read trash like that shoujo or see het pedo shows which thinks 500 year old is attracted to a little 7 year old. You’ll find many trash homophobic people like you there.

Even on manga sites you see idiotic lists like, erotica Not BL, smut with anything but bl, quality smut not BL.

Seriously, how fucking pressed are you that people don’t seem to give two fucks about your fm ships, these fm smut mangas have way less views than BL.

Be decent and write mf smut list, shoujo josei smut or something of the like. You have to mention bl somehow don’t you? This isn’t even pathetic, it’s downright gross. 

No wonder some foolish homophobic trash wrote lies like omegaverse does not belong to slash. You have to be completely shameless and downright stupid to write such horseshit.

Of course, some freaks even like that horrendous, homophobic, monstrous bitch from ten count. To this day I don’t understand how anyone can say such things.

She looked good standing next to kurose. She is good looking.

I just cant—

What a joke! She is human garbage nothing more and ugly as hell.

Ugh, the only place she should be in is a fucking sewer. I hate that bitch so much. She deserves to die a million times for what she did. Her existence is a fucking disgrace.

[pokedash55]

Acronix X Coffee Robot Crack AU

SUGGEST READING MY ECHO MEETS ACRONIX FIC BEFORE THIS

IT BUILDS ON THIS WACKY WORLD OF MINE

Click for Echo Meets Acronix Fic

To summarize//TL;DR: Acronix falls out of the time vortex at the light house a befriends Echo Zane, learns empathy and put Echo on Social media so everyone knows he exists now. 

-After he leaves echo zane with a borg watch he finds himself back in Ninjago

-Stalks borg and his fam like a creep

-Jay introduces Echo to the dyer family

-Echo and unagami are siblings now

-Acronix is kinda like Echos big brother

-But no one else accepts this

-Zane and Pix give skeptical and menacing, “if you touch him” glares

-Unagami is confused babi and likes their new brother echo

-So Like One day it’s Borg, Pix, Zane, Jay, Unagami, Echo, and Milton dyer, and Acronix in a room together  (Fic on that later :3 )

-The whole fam

-Nixie just lingers around borg tower saying random junk sometimes

-Acronix : “You either die a villian or live long enough to see yourself become…”

-Pix: “A very annoying customer who is about to be escorted out of the building?”

-“UH NO. Wrong answer Pix (“dont call me pix”). REDEEMED. Cause I’m like… totally redeemed now”

-Just holds up a high five for the room and left hanging by everyone

-Jay’s like :Yeeeoree not part of our group”

-So like Acronix and Echo Zane are bro’s now cause I said so??

-Everyone: Nix is part of the Borg Family

-Me: Well YES, but actually no

-This isn't really a Future thing

-In this they're mostly frenemies kinda??

-But Acronix does really like him and borg tower and Borg is too nice to throw him out XD

-Acronix has zip money and doesn’t FEEL like looking for Krux rn

-Gets his morning coffee everyday bro

-Starts crushin on the Coffee manager (naming her shannon after the voice actor)

-His routine is basically wake up, coffee, Shannon, stalk borg, watch memes, think about looking for kux than fall asleep on phone

-Posts bout his lil bro alot (echo)

-Posts about Shannon ALOT

-Many many selfies of him an his coffee

-Realizes he may need to get someplace to live since he had yet to venture for krux

-Shoot money is a thing he doesn’t have

-Borg be super kind like, “You can stay at my Newly renovated highly advanced Borg Hotel but you must get a job.”

-Acronix gestures at being one of those technology intern clerks at borg industries. “Is for me?”

-”Must get a job AND leave my family alone…. For now… please?”

-Borg is too nice to the guy who kidnapped him and is infatuated with living at borg tower

-Does borg live in borg tower?

-Gunna say he does

-Cause Acronix just LOITERS in borg tower 24/7

-Like its like hours after closing of the downstairs shop and Pix is like getting her suit on and forcefully escorting Nixie out of the premises

-So anyway Nix has to get a job

-Ugh entry level Jobs are SO beneath him.

-Pouts uwu

-Gets a job as a barista to at least have fun with someone cool

-Ronin notices that sales have gone up in the coffee shop since Acronix has started hanging around there, because the girls think he’s pretty and he posts a lot on social media.

-Ronin wants this, but doesn’t want to have to actually pay Acronix for being a faceman.

-Hires him “as a barista”. Basically he hires Acronix to sit at the counter and look pretty, while giving the joint free advertising.

-Acronix totally doesn’t notice this and is fine with being completely exploited and underpaid.)

-Acronix X Coffee Bot! (In this she’s named Shannon)

-Shannon is like… chill and rude, but never offensive

-Cheats in chess

-Smug about it too like deamn she mean

-Epic moves (Both spinny sign and juggling. And makes epic coffee)

-Unflinching at a fire

-Complete apathy

-Throws "Floyds"  teapot plan away immediately cause she doesn’t get paid enough for this sh*t

-Says she doesn’t drink coffee but than is seen drinking coffee that lier

-Bad habit of Ignoring stufft. Ignores the upgrade, ignores her lie detector, ignores the fact the -machine is literally ice frozen

-She wears a miniskirt and a crop top/bra thingy to WORK. On the clock! savage

-Nixie is confirmed to get crushes easily and like powerful/ mean woman (Machia)

-Also he has no shame in liking nonhumans

-Love technology so would totally vibe with her

-Robotsexual for sure

-Powercouple

-Since she is still A.I, so Nix’s outgoing and I don’t care i'm great loud personality would really surprise her and she’d be inspired/impressed by his lack of chill and lack of care

-She has a bit of sass and goth hot topic to her but also still has that robot innocence that would blend nicely with Acronix since he is also Abrasive and rude on the outside, but is a tad of a softy coward (He hugs his bro and cowers behind him and gets adorably defensive when he snarks at him)

-He’d teach her so much about being more alive… maybe a bad influence but she’d dig it

-He calls her Shay almost constantly

-He hates being called Nix

-Like he is a prideful warrior who expects people to use his full name in respect

-But Shannon is too cool for that

-Calls him Nix sometimes anyway

-Respects her boldness

-The audacity to do so without permission!

-Shannon owns a motorcycle because come on

-Ridin home on a sick bike together

-Stealin stuff when people aren’t looking

-Banned from Ronin thrift shop for sure (they're lucky they weren't fired after that night. But he literally can't fire shannon)

-Chill on friday nights at Laughys karaoke.

-Not singing, just laughing at how stupid other people look singing drunk kareoke

-So a jock dork egotist and a apathetic punk bot walk into a bar

-Dareth honestly doesn’t know this guy was the one sending snakes after his trophies so he just treats him like a normal costumer

-Neither of them care about Dareth’s attempts at small talk.

-Too busy loving themselves like idiots

-She kicks his ass in strategy video games and he destroys her in battle royal stuff

-Both are equally bored by like Animal crossing and other fake life games YAWN so much work

-Shannon enjoys the thrill of racing games

-Nixie plays em but it’s not his best game

-Both GEAMMERS (but in a frighteningly cool way. They somehow both avoid nerd status… nixie still a dork tho. Jock dork)

-She makes coffee art of her hubbies face.

-He gives her so much social media attention

-Acronix gives her coffee shop media rep and he loves the petty feeling of beating Wu at something

-She doesn’t quite get his excitement in it (cause she’s on neutral terms with Wu) but loves the media attention

-She doesn’t get his phrases and he finds that both aggravating and endearing

-“Um I’m Aconic”

-Shannon: “So you’ve been lying about your name this whole time?

-Acronix: “...?”

-“That's honestly sick”

-Acronix “… “

-One day they joy ride on a motorcycle

-End up loitering around borg tower

-Borg officially meets Shannon and is interested in her origin

-Her design is not like he has seen but it also seems familiar

-She says she doesn't remember much other than working for ronin

-"Ronin" borg mutters spitefully

-He has a history of y'know.. Messing with his tech (dismantling pixal and selling zane hmmm)

-Does a diagnostic code scan

-Acronix worried bout his bae and hyped he was actually invited in for once.

-Progress on that "friendship"

-He discovers her model and general code is similar if not almost exactly the same as pixal’s code

-Ronin scrapped together with some mechanical help from his friends the walkers to make a functioning robot manager with borg tech he scrounged up and a stolen copy of pixal’s blueprints ( maybe he took pictures of them when he sold her to chen) and specs so he wouldn't have to pay for multiple employees. Just having the one really efficient one would save him thousands

-So shannon is pixals sister

-And her parents are The walkers, Ronin, and borg

-The family tree only grows people

-So Acronix is apart of the ninja family now if he marries Shannon

-Here's a chart if you're as confused as I am here:

-Anyway Shay doesn't really care much

- Her expression doesn't change

-She had never really gone out of her way to worry where she was from so it wasn't a huge revelation

-It was to nixie tho

-As the extravert he was (and has extensive experience of being a sibling) he had to make sure she got to know her new family NOW

-Like in the middle of the night now

-He never waits for things to happen

-Pix is first and she is about to power down for the night when...

-DOOR SLAMS OPEN

-"Hi SIS!!" Acronix just screams

-"hey. I'm like your sister now." Obvi shannon is more lowkey about it

-Shannon and pixal mildly get along

-Questions her taste in men alot

-Acronix chills in the back already bored and ready to move on.

-Although he's annoyed by them, the ninja were next up

-Zane and Jay are both family now

-Shannon starting to think he's using all this to fill the void of his brother being gone.

-Cause she has no interest for or against meeting these people but Nix sees it as urgent

-But he seems happier than usual so she'll let him throw her name around for a while. She did mooch off his social media so it was only fair

-Anyway eventually Acronix does find his brother, and tries to explain this whole mess to his less-than-thrilled twin

-God once Krux gets back tho

-“Hey bro! I married a robot she’s amazing!”

-He’s just taking selfies with her in hot topic outfits both of them

-“God no my brothers Robotsexual. My worst nightmares have been realized”

-Krux can only stare in horror at the people his brother now considers “family”

-Wu’s students?!, Robots!?, what EVEN IS AI?!?!?

-He eventually gets over it

-eventually maybe

-At least he can admire her attitude

-Will still mess with his bro tho.

-This is the worst timeline imaginable.

-But I can't apologize for art

[billantoinette]

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