#when I just feel like a dumbass most of the time

[hot-patootiee]

Part 2 of this. And can you tell I had issues with my ex? Like holy shit I’m having flashbacks writing this.

Nancy stands up and walks over to Eddie though, and gently pushes him towards the door.

“Go fix it.” She demands.

Eddie makes a confused sound as he is gently pushed out of the house, having to push open the door or be squished into it.

…

When Steve’s doorbell rings again, he’s getting a little annoyed.

He swings open the door and Eddie is there.

Steve begins to close the door.

Unfortunately he is forced to deal with his feelings, so Eddie puts a hand on the door and pushes it open.

“Did you think we were dating?” Eddie seems almost accusatory in his tone, which immediately annoyed Steve.

“What do you mean by ‘think’ Eddie? I asked you out, you said yes.” Steve was still trying to shut the door in Eddie’s face, but he looked more angry than sad. “Unless this is some sort of strange apology and declaration of love, I don’t wanna hear it.”

“It is! It is! Just don’t close the door.” Steve furrows his brows and lets the door swing open.

Eddie stumbles in, tripping over the entrance and nearly falling into Steve.

Steve stares at Eddie, waiting.

“I thought you were just experimenting and I’m so sorry for thinking your confession was a joke.” Eddie says sincerely, shifting slightly on his feet in discomfort.

“You think everything I do is a joke. Everyone does! Poor little Steve Harrington gets hit in the head too many times and now is incapable of a coherent thought.” Steve finishes with a self deprecating laugh. His eyes are shining and Eddie can see the rage festering in them, the resignation transforming into simmering anger.

Eddie opens his mouth to refute it, but is cut off instead.

“Was kissing me a joke too? Am I too stupid to know?” Steve moves into Eddie’s face, crowding him before pulling back suddenly. A strong gust reminds Eddie the door is open and anyone close enough could hear them.

“No, no of course not. Shouldn’t we close the door?” Eddie suggests.

“You’re the dumbass who didn’t close it. There is no we in that.” Steve sneers at Eddie’s implication at Steve being incompetent.

“You’re right, I’m sorry.” Eddie murmurs, pushing the door hard and letting it swing shut. His shoulders are hunched, as if he was trying to placate Steve by making himself smaller.

“I thought you were different, I put up with everybody else calling me stupid all the time, because most of them are children, and I thought you, my boyfriend, was different. But, apparently, you think I’m too incompetent with my own feelings that you need to make the judgement for me.”

“I thought you were joking.” Eddie repeated, Steve was honestly beginning to hear the needle on the vinyl from how many times Eddie had been repeating himself.

“And when I kissed you, was I still just joking?” Steve probed.

“No, can you just let me explain for a second?” Eddie spat his words out quickly, knowing if he went slower Steve would continue to yell at him.

“No, because you’re charging in here with some half cocked apology to try to fix something, just because someone else pointed out that you should. You need to feel better, so you came over to apologize, without considering that I’ve been wallowing in my house for days because of something you did. Actually fucking apologize because you feel bad about putting me in pain, not because you want to stop being uncomfortable with your own actions.” Steve lectured, he massaged the bridge of his nose slightly in an attempt to alleviate his own frustration.

“What do you want me to do? How do I fix this?”

“Those are questions you have to answer yourself. Maybe apologize with something that screams ‘sorry for thinking our entire relationship was a joke’. If you come here with some fucking flowers or chocolate and think that that’s adequate, I will break your fucking guitar.” The wrinkles in Steve’s brow just became deeper as he threatened Eddie. His muscles trembled slightly as he reminded himself of how angry he was.

Eddie nods, looking slightly resigned.

“Oh, and your fucking behavior should change, treat me like a goddamn person. I pulled your ass out of hell, I’ve proved myself to be capable a thousand times over. Treat me like I am.” Eddie couldn’t help but focus on how Steve’s hands shook.

Eddie nods and begins to pull away from Steve, looking sad as he slowly moves to the door.

“What are you doing?” Steve looked genuinely puzzled, prompting Eddie to stop with his hand on the doorknob.

“I’m leaving, I didn’t think you’d want me here.” Eddie shrugged, looking a lot like a kicked puppy as he whimpered. He then began to turn the doorknob to exit the Harrington house.

“What did I just say about making decisions for me?” Steve has his hip cocked and his hands resting on his waist in his signature annoyed mom look. Eddie freezes, unknowing of what to do.

“Come on, go to my room and wait, I just need to run the dishes.” Steve shoos Eddie, who quickly scampers up the stairs and slipped inside Steve’s room. He was unsure of what to do so he waited at the foot of the bed, sitting on the edge of it.

He isn’t sure how long he waits, but Steve finally pads into the room.

Steve pushes Eddie onto his back. Crawling inbetween his legs.

Eddie opens his mouth to express his confusion, but is interrupted by a firm “scooch” which spurs Eddie into backing up into the headboard. Steve follows quickly behind.

Steve tucks himself into Eddie’s collarbone. He settles easily, even though Eddie is still incredibly tense.

“Tell me the other thing you came here to say.” Steve demands.

“Oh darling I like you so much. I’ll stay with you forever, I’m so sorry for leaving.” Eddie rambles, like the floodgates holding him back had been released.

“Again?” Steve said quietly, barely louder than his breath.

“I like you a lot, Steve. I got the biggest crush on you. Never thought you’d ever like someone like me. I don’t deserve you.” Eddie ends with a damn near whimper, but Steve’s resolve didn’t change in the face of Eddie’s words.

“You’re right, you don’t. You left me and you were planning on leaving me again if I didn’t accept your apology. It’s been days and all I want is to be with my boyfriend.” Steve’s voice slowly tampered down to a whisper as he spoke.

“I didn’t think of it like that.” Eddie murmured shamefully.

“Yea, no shit.” Steve snapped.

“I’m sorry.”

“Your formal apology better be fucking amazing.” Steve countered playfully.

“I’ll do my best.” Eddie pauses for a second. “What if it’s not good enough?”

“Then I break up with you.” Eddie deflates slightly. Steve continues though. “I can’t be with someone who doesn’t value me or respect me, I’ve made that mistake before.”

Eddie felt his stomach sink, but began to brainstorm on how to make it up to Steve.

Btw El and Will are making Brownies for Steve rn.

PART 3 IS HERE

Omg I’m such an ass, pt 3 coming soon if I’m harassed enough to do it.

Also, psa if you fuck up big, you need to actually show you’re sorry. Don’t apologize to make yourself feel better, apologize to make the other person feel better. Make an actual effort to not repeat your past actions. If someone doesn’t accept your apology, remember you aren’t entitled to their forgiveness. No matter how much society tries to act like you deserve it for simply apologizing.

Also if it isn’t evident, I was forced to accept a lot of apologies when I didn’t want to.

@stripey82 @genderfluidbitch @mensch-anthropos-human @c4tharsys @scoops-aboy86 @breealtair @raleighrox @wannabe-edgy-grandpa @flustratedcas @shoujo-wizard @polysdoitforscience @exasperatedsighohmy @piemaker93 @tinyplanet95 @skepticalqueen @sharingisntkaren @scarletyeager @crypticcrytid @midnightskeeper @wheneverfeasible @ancientwormcivilization @fucjinf-whatever-dude @estrellami-1 @queenofshenanigans @grilledcheesehasfeelings <- get out of my walls

@ellietheasexylibrarian @live-laugh-love-dietrich @turinspeachjam @me-ig7 @revevivant @motherofpirates @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @samsoble @legalmenace87 @thehanwen @bigspongey @thedragonsaunt @newagemyth @pentapoctopus @my-hyperfixations-hell-blog @bumbledoubletea @blackbirdflyflyfly @what-if-a-dragon @reddiandbyler4life @i-think-i-thunk @gregre369 @fiddledeedee85 @ladykailitha

Rest of the mentions will be in the comments because fuck there is a lot of you.

[kiskivmiske]

This. Exactly that.

I also begged mom time and time again to please PLEASE buy me boy clothes. I had handmedowns from my dad when he was a kid and they weren't half as comfortable as girls clothes.

But mom was pretty conservative at the time and would be afraid to buy boys/unisex clothes. She was scared I'll be perceived as a lesbian/transgender and asked me on multiple occasions if I like girls. I had to wear stupidly thin tees with dumbass lettering like "I'm allowed to do it, I'm a girl" (translated from Russian, "мне можно, я девочка", a popular phrase implying that women are forgiven weaknesses because they are a weak gender) "little angel" "baby". Aha, little angel baby 170 cm 75 kg beating grown up pedos, lmao.

I was never morbidly obese, but I was 5-20 kg overweight on different stages of life. (Except for the time I tried to lose weight to make a boy like me, and it turned out he was just hanging out with me because I was a pushover and did things for him like homework or art, he ended up with a chubby girl, I ruined my health and it's all for nothing) Never, even when I was starving myself and lost 25 kg in three months, NEVER did I have my clothes sitting comfortably.

I am fat not because I play CS or LoL 24/7 in my gaming chair (advertisement goes here), I just have a messed up eating schedule where I go all day w/o food and eat in the evening. I spend most of my free time walking around the woods, gathering berries, shrooms, herbs, rafting, swimming, rock hounding, etc. And I demand good quality and fit from my clothes. And girls clothes never allowed to move freely. Winter coat wraps around my legs so I can't make a big step to climb a small rock or get over a fallen tree. I don't even feel safe, because, if I need to run, my legs are half tied.

Pants with ridiculously thin rubber make marks on my belly, I can't lift my arms without my shirt creeping up my torso all the way to my teets. Every single time in gym I had to stop and adjust it so my belly isn't constantly exposed. I had to buy new shirts every two months because they were so thin, normal exercises overstretched them. You don't need infinity stones to snap them out of existence.

I accumulated some lunch money and secretly went to buy a new shirt. In men's section. It was the most comfortable shirt I had since I've grown out of dad's. My boobas are quite large, but still it fit me perfecly (probably because designed for broader chest) It served me for two years at school and four more as a hiking shirt (because it had a few stains but still held itself together).

Mom didn't notice anything and I continued to buy men's shirts, then pants. One time my mom came to me and this interaction happened.

"Where did you buy this shirt" (shows her shirt to compare) "I need something for work that isn't so thin. You can even see my bra through it. Look how thick this (on my shirt) fabric is, I need one."

"In (the market)"

"I've been there recently and didn't see one"

I pause "It's uh in men's section"

Mom, without a pause: "You go past (the market) every day, can you get me one?"

Mom also noticed that my shirts take MUCH longer to rip, stretch or wear down and since then didn't say a word about me buying clothes that aren't my gender. The only clothes for women I wear is a swimsuit, panties and a fedora.

(I do realize that maybe there are good women's shirts, that don't go in landfill after few months, but I never has access to them because of my income and location)

I also had permanent scars from wearing rubber boots and had trouble explaining my family I wasn't stuck in a bear trap. But that's another story.

Women's clothing sucks. And I now firmly believe that one of the reason women are more obsessed about their weight is because of clothing. Growing up I mostly wore mens/boys clothing and I never had to think about size, waist, etc. The clothes won't hug my thighs in the sense that would make me conscious of them while moving. If the waist was too big id grab a belt. Plus the design of pants and tshirts was pretty standard.

Now during my late teens, early twenties i started going towards more women's clothing. Because i felt I had to look more feminine. And HOLY SHIT. It sucked. BAD. First the material. Its so bad and thin and cost more than guys clothes. No standard Tshirt fit, everything has a different shoulder to chest ratio. The pants are either too tight, hug your ass and thighs too much or are too baggy to be comfortable. And the waist. Holy shit. Ive been underweight till I was 23 (medical reasons). And I didnt have a lot of problem with the waist thing then (see where this is going) but the moment I kicked my illness and gained weight and got into normal weight range, dude the waist thing became a big issue. FIRST of all. For guys the waist end at waist, the hip bone area. Not for women. Most clothes go above the hip bones, some even over the belly button. If the thing feels right standing up, youll suffocate sitting down. And even if its elastic waistband, its sitting on your stomach, it does not have a bone to support it and it feels uncomfortable. (Maybe I have some sensory issue, I don't know about yall but I dont like being conscious of clothes sticking to my body). And now to the main point. I never had any issue with waist being uncomfortable when I was underweight or when I wear boys pants (really pants made for boys get more humanly consideration than women) and the moment i got into normal range, the womens pants saying they are my waist size fit pretty snug and tight around my waist, ass and thighs. But still till this day I never face this issue with my boys pants. Today while trying on some pants that my mom gifted me that said their waist was a size bigger than mine I found then uncomfortable and started thinking should I lose some weight? And that fucking blew my mind because I am already thin and in a pretty normal range of BMI. Those clothes feel comfortable as long as you are underweight. That is insane. Seriously. Ladies if this the case with you all. Or maybe some of you. Ditch the women's section. If you are short like me, go for the boys section or else mens. These fucking clothing sizes and designs are not made thinking of your comfort in mind. Now im gonna go to the store and exchange the pants for some boys khaki pants.

I think this is just one face of how the system is designed to make you feel uncomfortable and doubt yourself. You see how much waist room guys get? We are the same species after all. What the fuck. Do you make different size clothing for male and female cats or monkeys? No fucking other species have such a wide difference in body shape than what humans are told we have.

[maruflix]

BOYS BEWARE! #variouscharacters #windbreaker #f!reader

the boys know that you are the town’s most notorious heartbreaker. it would be stupid for them to involve themselves with you. it’s not like they didn’t know that they’re sharing you with their own friends— but damn you look fine. / REQ.

feat. sakura, suo, kaji, umemiya, togame, endo, takiishi　　⎯⎯　wc. 4.1k

content: female reader, REVERSE HAREM, reader is a heartbreaker, pre-established relationship, they fall in love first, they fall in love harder, reader is either toxic or playful depending on how you look at it, OKAY READER IS KINDA TOXIC, this is a brainrot and a passion project god bless whoever sent this request, no beta we die like my hopes and dreams

SAKURA HARUKA -> MET A BOY FROM OUTTA TOWN...

Sakura doesn’t know how to express his emotions, so he usually lets them rot and die inside him, preferring to ignore them until they disappear.

He never succeeds to do so whenever you come around. All it takes is one smile. One smile from you and he’s completely defenseless at your mercy.

“I-is this guy bothering you?” Sakura’s attempt to sound gruff seems to fool the dumbass who thinks he’s got a chance with you. He eyes down the weak looking eyesore who kept bothering you since five minutes ago. The pathetic creature couldn’t even look him in the eye.

You flash him a smile. That damn smile. He feels like he’s going to choke.

“He is!” you sigh, tugging the sleeve of his jacket, “Are you here on patrol?”

The weakling knows to make himself scarce, leaving Sakura standing alone with you. He hopes you can’t hear his heart thundering inside his ribcage.

“Yes. I came to give you this.” He clumsily hands you a small box of your favorite cake, almost dropping it in the process and quickly adding, “I-I accidentally bought extra!”

You’re now blinking your gorgeous eyes, surprised, but reach out to take it anyway. “Oh, Haruka-kun! You’re so thoughtful!”

The way his name rolls out your tongue makes him go insane.

“Thank you! You’re the best!” Giggling, you hug his arm, accidentally brushing your head against his shoulder..

Just when he’s about to ask you if you had any plans that weekend, he sees that your line of vision has shifted away from him. He follows it to see Suo standing a couple feet away, smiling.

Oh.

He looks down to see you already smiling up at him like nothing happened. “Anyway, I’ll see you around, Haruka-kun! Maybe we can watch a movie together this weekend?”

His heart leaps; so you also want to spend more time with him! He’s just about to say that he’d really, really want that— but you’re already slipping away from his grasp into the direction of his best friend.

You turn your head once more to look at him, “Text me!” before skipping away.

It’s okay, Sakura convinces himself, I’ll definitely text you first.

The warmth of you still lingers on his arm.

SUO HAYATO -> I HELD THE KNIFE BUT YOU HAD THE GUN

Why does Suo still waste his time with you?

He wonders the same thing when he stares at you, eating in front of him.

You eat without a care in the world. Then again, you never seem to care about anything. He just wishes that you’d care about him more. What did you think he was going to feel when he sees you in the arms of Sakura freaking Haruka in the middle of the day? But then again, it’s not like he’s your boyfriend or anything, so it’s not like he had a say—

“Hayato-kun, aren’t you gonna eat?”

Suo blinks, looking down at his half-eaten salad. He’s supposed to be on a diet, but he’d gladly eat a five course meal if it meant being able to spend time with you. “Sorry!” he smiles, “I was too busy staring at you, it seems!” Other people would’ve gotten flustered with his teasing. Suo knows he’s handsome and talks well.

“Oh?” you tilt your head, “do I look pretty today? You’ve been staring a lot~”

Suo’s gaze snaps back to you, his heart skipping a beat. He instantly regrets it when he sees you smiling at him teasingly, a lock of hair falling in front of your face perfectly.

“Very.” he breathes out, brushing your hair away from your face. Hoping that it’d be enough to finally fluster you. Hoping that he can finally win against you for once.

He didn’t expect you to blush. The red tinting your cheeks makes you glow. “Hayato-kun, a surprise attack like that is not fair..”

Suo feels like he’s finally reclaiming himself. Redeeming himself from the devil that is you. Feeling brave, he moves his hand to rest on top of yours, not missing the way your eyes widen ever so slightly. Maybe, maybe....

“What..?”

“It’s my birthday this week.” He starts, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, “do you have any plans?”

In truth, he knows that you already plan on spending the weekend with Kaji Ren (how can he not know, when Kaji blabs to everyone about it?) but he wonders if you’ll choose to be with him instead. He tried not to be desperate but he already knew there’s no fooling you, not when the corners of your lips lift ever so slightly—

“Oh, really?!”

He can see that the gears in your brain are turning, your pretty eyes flitting across the room to find an excuse. Still, the enthusiasm in your voice left him hoping.

“I forgot! You know how bad I am with my own schedule..”

Suo exhales, trying not to look disappointed.

“But I’ll definitely cancel them to give you a surprise party!” You pull his hands to hold them tight, a serious look on your face, “Wait. It’s not a surprise if I tell you beforehand, is it?”

The twinkle in your eyes makes Suo wonder if you’ve expected this test. He may have won this fight, but he’s destined to lose the war. There’s just no winning against you.

Even so, he has won this fight... and he couldn’t bring himself to care about anything else.

KAJI REN -> YOU CHEW MY HEART LIKE BUBBLEGUM !

Kaji tries to not go overboard, but he did anyway.

He’s tailored the hangout to your exact liking, booking everything two weeks in advance, making you squeal in joy when he tells you that he secured a spot in that hip new café that you keep eyeing during walks.

So when you fail to show up, Kaji knew that it was because of another man. He may be oblivious sometimes but he’s not stupid. There’s no way you cancelled on him last minute to feed your grandma’s cat. Your grandma died two months ago for God’s sake.

That’s why he’s steeled his heart to finally break away from your grasp. He can’t keep hurting himself and hoping you’d finally see him as your only love. He’s not stupid.

“I’m sorry, Ren-kun... you’re still mad at me, aren’t you?”

He refuses to look at you, knowing that he’d fold the instant he sees those gorgeous eyes.

“I messed up.. I have no excuse..”

“Why?” he asks, demands for you to say it with your own mouth. Say that you chose another man over him.

“Okay. I’ll tell you the truth.” You bent down to look at him, unrelenting even when he stares at you coldly, “It was Hayato-kun’s birthday yesterday. I threw him a surprise party with Haruka-kun and Nirei-kun.”

There’s a rare sincerity in your words, a fragile honesty that makes him both relieved and forlorn. “Thank you for telling the truth.” He didn’t want you to see him cry, so he gets up and starts to walk away.

“Wait! Ren-kun!” You call after him, making him walk faster. His eyes are already starting to burn. He had wanted you to tell him the truth, so why does it still hurt this much?

“Oof!”

The sudden thud makes him stop dead in his tracks. The unmistakable sound of a crash. He spins around, seeing you bent over on the ground, holding your knee. His heart drops, already forgetting the reason he walked away in the first place.

“Why are you so clumsy?!” He chides, squatting down next to you. The red in your knee is starting to drip down to your ankle. Guilt bubbles up in his throat, blocking his airway. You’re bleeding because of him.

“Sorry, I can’t even walk right..” you’re still smiling even when tears are streaming down your face. Even then, you look radiant.

“Climb up.” He offers his back, almost losing his mind from the guilt and worry.

“I can’t receive any more of your kindness,” your voice is small behind him, “I’m a horrible friend..”

Kaji wants to yell at you to prioritize yourself more, to tell you that he’ll probably sulk for a day before returning to you with a wagging tail— but all his words get caught in his throat when he sees you crying.

What can he do, except pull you into his embrace?

You melt almost instantly, sobbing apologies after apologies.

What can he do, except tell you that it doesn’t matter and he’s the one at fault?

Fuck it. He is stupid, he is dumb— and he will continue to be, if it means being able to hold you in his arms.

UMEMIYA HAJIME -> SHE MAKES THEM FALL DOWN TO THEIR KNEES AND CRY

Umemiya thinks that he has an advantage over the other guys that flock to you.

When you had a bad day and snap at him, he pats your head and listens to your problems. When he saw you laughing with Endo and Takiishi, he turns a blind eye. When you tell him you suddenly felt like hanging out with Togame, there’s a prick in his heart, but even so, he understands.

He’s very mature and mentally stable. No amount of cancelling plans and harsh words and flirting with other boys can faze him. He thought that those qualities would make you love him more— but he is so sorely mistaken.

“Is something on your mind?” Umemiya bends down slightly but you look away, your lips pursed into a tight line. He rubs your hair, knowing how much you love headpats, but all he got is an annoyed huff.

He’s terrified now.

“What’s wrong?” He can no longer hide the panic in his voice.

Finally, you look at him.

“You don’t love me.”

Your accusation makes him want to die. How can you say that he doesn’t love you when he has fought all his jealousy and killed all his pride?

Umemiya leads you to a nearby bench and kneels down to your height, trying to use the cold ground as a way to cool his beating heart, “Why do you say that?”

You’re twirling a lock of hair now, something you always do when you’re annoyed. “Do you even want to be with me? It’s like you’re just hanging out with me to pass time. Do you even care?”

Your words seem so straightforward, yet Umemiya still doesn’t understand. Whatever did he do that can possibly translate to such a baseless statement?

“I didn’t know that you’re not on good terms with Endo and Takiishi. I look like a bad friend. You don’t even care who I’m hanging out with.”

But Umemiya does care. He cares so much about who you’re hanging out with that he secretly tells the guys to go on patrols whenever you come to visit him, knowing that you’ll definitely get distracted otherwise. He cares so much that he tells Takiishi Chika to stay the hell away from you, causing him to get into a full blown fight. He cares.

“I do.” He frowns, “If I tell you I’m a jealous person, what will you do?”

He merely wanted to punish you a bit for doubting his affections. Someone as kind as you would definitely get flustered when he says something so out of character.

But when he glances at you, you look at him straight in the eyes.

“I will be happy,” The light from the lamppost casts a warm glow over your face, “because finally, you’re being honest with me.”

Umemiya doesn’t know what he’s feeling. Your words are so kind, so you, but it’s like alarm bells are going off inside his head.

“I like it when Hajime-kun is jealous. In fact, I like all of Hajime-kun’s qualities.” Your hand is now tangled in his hair, caressing them softly.

It’s scary how your touch silences all his doubts and makes him putty in your hands. He breathes out a sigh of relief and leans into your touch, knowing that he found favor in your eyes again. “Okay. Okay. I am jealous. Don’t hate me because of that..”

He looks up to see you smiling and a chill runs down his spine.

If you want him to beg, he will beg. If you want him to cry, he will cry. He might try not to show it, but heaven knows he will move hell to be with you.

TOGAME JO -> MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’VE BECOME INSANE.

Being a Shishitoren second-in-command makes Togame unable to spend as much time with you as he’d like.

You live in Makochi, so naturally you’re friends with the Furin boys. Normally, he’d feel relieved that you have other people to protect you from rival gangs when he’s not around, but he only now realizes how close you actually are with Bofurin.

It was supposed to be a surprise. He didn’t tell you that he’s visiting, hoping to catch you off guard when he suddenly drops by. Instead, it was you who caught him off guard.

Togame watches mutely as Umemiya pats your head, hearing the sound of his own heart breaking. The two of you doesn’t seem to realize that he’s standing right there. Like a fool.

“Oh? Togame-kun, you’re here!”

How? How can you sound so.. unbothered? He doesn’t even know what kind of expression is on his face right now.

Umemiya is looking at him without an ounce of guilt. Wait, has he been the fool all along? Has he always been second string? Togame’s head is full of thoughts, none of them good. Oh God, what should he do?

“Togame-kun? Are you okay?”

Your voice is inquisitive, innocent. He is brought back to reality when you grip his shoulder. He looks at you, standing on your tippy toes, your eyes wide and searching.

“You... him..”

“Hm?” As if reminded, you look at Umemiya. “Well, you didn’t tell me you were coming, so I had Hajime-kun walk me home! Uh, but since you’re here...”

Umemiya smiles. Tight. Togame knows that he will probably get a beating if you’re not there. But you are. And Umemiya Hajime relents.

“Right! We can walk home tomorrow. It’s not like everyday Togame visits!” Umemiya’s voice is cheery but the icy undertones is clear.

Don’t you dare make this an everyday occurence.

When Umemiya disappears, Togame lets you pull him with you, still at a loss for words.

“Sooo, what brought you here?” You seem so happy to see him... as if he didn’t just catch you with another man. “Oh, I just realized you have your hair tied! You look good! I like you better this way, I think!”

“Are you... going out with Umemiya Hajime?” Like a fool, that is the only thing can he can say.

You blink at him in surprise, like he just asked you if elephants could fly. Was he not supposed to ask? It’s not like he’s your boyfriend or anything... but you told him you love him.

“I...”

Your laugh interrupts his train of thought. “Of course not, silly!” It seems like his question is so funny that you’re actually doubling over and smacking his arm. “Oh, Togame-kun. Are you jealous?”

Are you seriously asking him that right now?

He’s not jealous. He’s furious.

“Maybe?”

“Aww, you’re so cute! And kinda naive, but like in a really cute way!” You’re resting your head on his arm now, hugging it as the two of you continue walking, “Me and Hajime-kun, we’re just friends! You can ask him if you want!”

Togame doesn’t know what to say. He feels stupid. Maybe he’s just not used to having female friends who’s also friends with other guys. “Why do you call him by his first name?”

You stop walking, causing him to pause too. “Oh my God!” Feeling you pull his arm, Togame turns to look at you. “Togame-kun, you’re totally jealous! That’s so cute! Is it because I don’t call you by your first name?”

Yes. Yes, it is. Why would you say you love him and call another guy by his first name? But now that Togame hears himself, he wonders if he’s just being crazy. He’s ashamed of himself now.

“Don’t sulk like that, Jo-kun. I was too shy to call you so intimately, you know!”

Togame feels like he’s being pacified... but he doesn’t hate it. He pulls you closer to him, engulfing you in a side hug, letting you nuzzle up to him. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever. I don’t really care.”

He feels crazy. Seeing you with another man brought him to the edge of insanity. Luckily, Togame is not someone who backs down so easily. He watches you laughing and wonders when you’ll finally realize his feelings.

Maybe if he deals with Umemiya Hajime, you’ll finally be his and his alone?

ENDO YAMATO -> DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU

From the start, Endo can see that you and him are similar.

The two of you hide behind smiles, faking feelings until you lose track of what you actually feel. Trying to put a brave front and succeeding so much that everyone thinks you’re a self-obsessed, entitled brat with the ego of Mount Fuji.

Maybe he’s so full of himself that he sees so much of himself in you and he falls in love.

Despairingly.

Because you immediately call him out on his feelings, warning him that you don’t feel the same way.

Perhaps he truly is so sure of himself because he tells you that he will wait for you, however long it takes. As if waiting for you can make you love him.

“You’re hurt again!” Is the first thing you say when Endo walks to you today. Your eyebrows are immediately scrunched, eyes glowing in worry.

When he’s hurt, he feels like he’s the only one in your eyes.

You carefully examine the gash on his arm, delicately tracing the ends of the wound. Endo winces a bit. “Does that hurt? I’ll get a first aid kit.”

Endo watches in awe as your fingers move quickly, dressing his wound with the finesse of a nurse. You don’t catch him staring, too busy on your handiwork. On him.

“Thanks. You didn’t have to.” He says, hoping you’ll say otherwise.

“Mhm. But I did.”

“So why did you?” Endo feels like an attention-seeking child.

You close the first aid kit and look at him, sighing. “Because I care about you.”

His eyes must’ve glimmered with hope, because you quickly added, “You get hurt a lot, so I worry about you.”

“It’s because.. my head is not at the right place today.” Oh, he’s so desperate to get you to pay attention to him.

Who cares if he purposefully angers Chika? Maybe one of these days you’ll catch the guy beating him to a pulp with your own eyes and you’ll stop spending so much time with that devil. Who cares if he let Chika throw that punch? The more cuts he has, the better. That means you’ll spend more time dressing him up.

“What’s wrong?”

Endo shakes his head. “You won’t understand.”

He has long learned that you never back down from a challenge.

“Really? Try me.”

See? Endo smiles, “What do you do when you’re in love with someone who doesn’t love you back?”

There’s an indecipherable emotion in your eyes.

“What do you do...” Endo muses, “when you’ve tried to forget about this person, but you can’t?” He lets you hold his hand, inching closer to lean on you for comfort, “I think I love her with every fibre of my being.”

“Maybe someday she’ll return your feelings too.”

Endo closes his eyes and smiles. You spew out such beautiful lies, he fears he’ll start to believe them soon. “I hope so.”

“Yamato-kun. If someday...” your voice wavers, “if someday I were to return your feelings, would you still accept me?”

You know just how to play with his heart. Even so, he will take any chance that he gets. He grips your shoulders, staring into your eyes unblinkingly. “Yes. I told you I’ll wait.”

“Really?”

“How do you want me to prove it to you?”

You gaze at him. “Kiss me.”

Endo wants to cry. What is this game you’re playing now? Do you want to make sure he will never move on from you? To make sure he is so in love with you that he will do anything for you without hesitation? How much crueler can you be?

And how stupid is he?

He moves slowly, making sure that you’re not going to take back what you said. All you do is look at him with expectant eyes, not moving from your position, daring him to actually do it.

So Endo kisses you. And whatever doubts he has about his relationship with you disappears into thin air. All his rationale goes flying out the window. The electricity he feels when his lips move against yours can light a whole city.

You’re the first one to pull away, leaving him gazing at you helplessly.

“I’ll do it however many times you want.”

You merely smile in reply.

Well, you did warn him. But when has Endo ever let a warning stop him? You’re so heart-wrenchingly beautiful that even when the consequences of his actions leave him dying from a broken heart, Endo doesn’t think he will ever regret his choices.

TAKIISHI CHIKA -> SHE MAKES THE DEVIL WET HIS BED AT NIGHTTIME !

Takiishi isn’t used to chasing after people.

Even now, he tries not to show you how much he likes you. He knows you’re a sadist; he’s not blind to the long line of guys that you have left begging on their knees... and how you revel at their tears.

But Takiishi just can’t control himself when you get friendly with other guys. He knows that sometimes you do it purposefully. Why, he has no idea. Maybe you want to remind him that you’re able to leave him anytime, that he should stay on his knees for you.

Even without you testing him, Takiishi will always spend his lifetime begging for a fraction of your affection. He doesn’t care about what he has to do as long as he can be with you.

“Chika-kun.”

He already knows what you’re going to say next. “You know why I beat the shit out of him.” He states, getting up from his seat. “He loves it when you take care of his injuries. You know that.”

You sigh and close the door behind you. “Perhaps. Does that anger you?”

Takiishi wonders why you like to test his patience. No matter what you do, he can never bring himself to hurt you. He can’t even say anything that might offend you.

“Why do you not like me?” Takiishi questions, “Yet, you still linger around me. Why?”

He doesn’t even dare to slam the wall next to you, opting instead to cage you with his arms.

“Who says I don’t like you?”

“You..”

“I like you, Chika-kun.” There’s sincerity in your voice, but you’re not done. “It’s just that.. I also like Yamato-kun, Hajime-kun—”

“Stop.” Takiishi growls, “Do you want me to beat all of them to a pulp? You know that’s what I will do every time you say their name in my presence.”

“And give Yamato-kun another reason to spend more time with me? Make me visit Hajime-kun until his wounds are completely healed? Because you know they will let you throw that punch,” you whisper in his ear sweetly, “so I can take pity on them.”

Takiishi wants to scream, but no sound came out.

“But you will always win, Chika-kun. You’re the strongest fighter, after all. With no wound to dress, who will take pity on you?”

God, you’re mean today.

“I’m sorry.” He doesn’t know what he did, or what to say. He just wants you to stop being so cruel.

You laugh. “Why are you sorry?”

“I don’t know. Anything. Everything.”

Finally deciding to take pity on him, you hug him, feeling his arms immediately snaking around your waist to pull your closer. You let him rest his chin on top of your head.

“Oh, Chika-kun. How can I ever leave you?”

“Don’t.”

If anyone were to see the Takiishi Chika, speaking so softly and acting so defeated, his reputation would’ve crumbled to the ground. Thankfully you’re not just anyone— you’re the only weakness he has, the one thing he will never let go.

No matter how bloody his hands get, he will make sure to take care of your long line of guys so that he will be the last man standing.

[five-one-two-station]

Now that a lot of the dumbass discourse cloud has died down - or maybe I've just blocked the right people - I just want to articulate a bugbear of mine about a lot of S2 Caitlyn takes more specifically:

Caitlyn does not lose sight of her protective impulses, or impulses towards fairness and justice, for Zaun, during her peak cape era. Nor does she, having taken her first hit this painful, simply disregard or forget her compassion for Zaunites. These traits are as strong or maybe stronger than they were in S1.

That's the whole point.

She still believes she is acting in everyone's best interest. She believes the end justifies these means for everyone. She believes doing this is better for Zaun and Piltover.

This is a really important distinction. She isn't lashing out in a Hulk Rage at Jinx's hometown; she is doing this stuff because she thinks these means are justified by the ends. For everyone.

The reason the difference matters is because this is a really confrontational and difficult thing to grapple with as a viewer, but it's an important thing exactly for that reason.

Caitlyn is complicit in bad things that hurt people because she believes they're for their own good.

This is a completely human, relatable thing to do - but it makes people really uncomfortable to see it play out, to the point they're not even quite able to look it in the eye.

They want her to be a pettily angry Disney villain because it is simple and clean. We all understand what it's like to lash out in anger, and would recognize it in ourselves again, even if we did it anyway. We can recognize the impulse to be cruel or vengeful for the sake of it whether we are inclined to indulge it or not.

And we can choose not to quite easily - it is after all one of the most important lessons we spend our childhoods learning.

But it is a far more unsettling thing to be told "You can do something terrible even though it feels right, you can do something terrible even though you mean well" - because the natural implication of that is "...You could even be doing it right now".

That doesn't absolve her. There were ways for her to know better than this. She doesn't have any good choices when it comes to the Strike Team stuff, sure - but she does have choices after that point, when the trolley tracks aren't so few, and that's where she falls down.

Her failure then is in not thinking to continuously evaluate her decisions in their own terms, as she goes. In not continuously confronting herself with each individual step and its necessity; in letting herself be led out to sea just because her feet were already wet.

And it is in not being ready to see and hear somebody who can see her trajectory much more clearly from their vantage point than she can from hers.

What she did wrong wasn't losing sight of Zaun's own humanity or simply disregarding it, nothing as easy as that; it was losing sight of the fact she doesn't always have the tools to recognize what actually Serves and Protects that very thing, now, this time, today.

This is a far more valuable story, imho, than the "Oh she stubbed her toe and turned mean :( ".

What are you doing right now just because it was right last time? Because it feels right? Because you're sure it's for their own good?

Are you sure there isn't a way to know better...?

Are you trying to find out?

[fatcathappycat]

Narumitsu Hanahaki fic recs

What is more suited to Narumitsu than a good Hanahaki Disease fic? The term "Hanahaki disease" literally comes from the Japanese words "hana" (花, flower) and "haki" (吐く, to vomit).  Hanahaki au stories are often tragic, with the protagonist struggling to breath, their lungs becoming overgrown with flowers. It can be fatal, and can only be cured if the beloved reciprocates the feelings, or if an invasive surgery is performed that removes the flowers but also the memories and feelings associated with the beloved. Many Hanahaki victims refuse to give up their 'unnecessary feelings' and so the scene is set for some delicious angst and confessions, a perfect set up for our two sweet (and often idiotic), long suffering attorneys.

I should also mention that all the fics listed below are whumpy ‘lite.’ I would say all fit in the hurt/comfort category, but do read the tags.

As usual, these are in no particular order, because fics are to be enjoyed and celebrated, not ranked ;p

Enjoy!

1. Fall Where They May by flybykeylimepie

Rating: M Words: 9,014 Read time: 40 mins

A really creative and unique Hanaki story. I tend to come back to this one over and over when I'm feeling that need for something a bit whumpy but romantic. Recommended if you likes your beauty cut with a little pain. (Seriously my lungs kinda hurt at the end of this... but it's so good 🫁 🌸)

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

2. Hibernation by nonisland

Rating: T Words: 5,607 Read time: 25 mins

"The petals he spits out, wet and brilliant, curl at the ends. He wonders why they’re always blue. It is hardly as if he is in any danger of forgetting who this is for." A beautifully written ficlet from Miles' point of view.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

3. and when the morning comes, i'll breathe again by quantum27

Rating: T Words: 1,747 Read time: 10 mins

Interesting and fast-paced take on a Hanahaki au. Covers major milestones of the trilogy plus a bonus Larry fic!

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

4. Cyclamen Persicum (Resignation) by Axolotl_Supremacy

Rating: T Words: 10,467 Read time: 45 mins

Cute , wholesome and satisfying (well, as cute and wholesome as bloody flowers and an angst filled Hanahaki tale can be), filled with affectionate little nods to the characters we love.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

5. Blood red (golden yellow) by Ballad_Of_Firefly

Rating: T Words: 326 Read time: 5 mins

A bloody charming little ficlet about unnecessary feelings.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

6. Perseverance by Udaberri for narcissasdaffodil

Rating: G Words: 2,336 Read time: 10 mins

Beautifully written hanahaki disease one-shot. I really enjoyed some of the imagery and phrasing in this one. "As the years pass, he’ll gain a reputation for ruthlessness, but his breath will still smell of flowers..."

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

7. feelings are fatal by spacekidmidge

Rating: M Words: 5,118 Read time: 25 mins

“I have been in love with you, dumbass!”

Haha! Brilliant.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

8. love most definitely requited by TheEclecticLibrarian

Rating: T Words: 9,556 Read time: 40 mins

What a gorgeous title and what a gorgeous story… Seriously, I feel like this one should be on the 'Required Narumitsu Reading List.' (hmm, I think this might be a future post?)

Franziska, Kay, Maya and Trucy are featured strongly and there is dialogue between Franziska and Miles in the opening that just got me right in the feels. And finish it with a beautiful and funny confession scene? This fic deserves all the flowers.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

9. Love Ridden by redmorningstar

Rating: T Words: 3,634 Read time: 15 mins

Super sweet Hanahaki one-shot with one of my favourite versions of Edgeworth: worried and action-driven {;-)

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

10. not a flower on the wall by PennamePersona

Rating: T Words: 5,166 Read time: 20 mins

Excellent take on this genre: Hanahaki as a neurological condition, with a very kind of bitter-sweet ending. Refreshing and creative.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

11. OOO! BONUS!!! Freshly posted work in progress by a Narumitsu Master: Mourning Bloom by Evelinessa for ElAurian

Rating: T Words: 50K eventually? Read time: 20 mins

One of my favourite authors is tackling hanahaki disease? Sign me up! Only one chapter is up at the time of me posting this, but oooh, it's a good one.

—ڿڰۣ✿ڿڰۣ—

And that's it for now! If you have a favourite Hanahaki fic, please share it in the comments or tags!

See ya! ₍˄·͈༝·͈˄₎◞♡ * ੈ✿‧₊˚✿ ੈ✿‧

[echodoctor]

I've noticed a few people take "the Universe leads and we follow" to mean that the Northern Island's spiritual traditions were a more authoritarian kind of faith, similar to something like Catholicism- God hands down decrees and mortals must obey them.

And while that is one way you could interpret that, it's very much not the way I read it when I saw that line.

I do want to preface this by saying I am some extremely white dumbass who knows shit about this secondhand only so please take what I am about to say with not so much as grain as an entire Lot's wife worth of salt, but:

I think the followers of the Universe might have something closer to Taoism going on.

Again, this is something I'm very vague on, but I remember reading that the ideal in Taoism is essentially to be in utter harmony with the natural rhythms of the world around you, effortlessly moving with them instead of desperately struggling against the flow. The world has natural processes: night follows day, decay follows death, the tides come in and out, etc. Understand and accept those processes, and you can float through seemingly effortlessly, because the natural movements of the world are at your back and carrying you forward, instead of something you struggle against.

There's a dynamic that shows up in a lot of classical Chinese stuff between Confucianism (very concerned with things being right and correct and proper) and Taoism, where the Confucian is angrily trying to make everything Work The Way It Should and the Taoist is affectionately teasing the Confucian for getting so worked up, and is having a much easier time because they've accepted the way things already are.

Like, the Confucian walks through a lovely peach grove and keeps getting mad because the trees are shedding leaves all over the path and no one bothered to rake them off, you're supposed to be keeping these paths clear, doesn't anyone do anything around here! The Taoist just has a nice walk and enjoys the peaches, maybe catches a nice ripe tasty fruit right before it falls on the Confucian's head.

I don't think it would be a one-to-one thing, but my personal guess is that the followers of the Universe believed in something similar.

The Universe leads you, in the same way that an ocean current sweeping you out to sea is leading you. That's just the way it is, and you can either struggle against it until you tire yourself out and drown, or you can recognize what's happening and learn how to ride the current to your destination.

This could have both positive aspects (compassion and acceptance towards others, living in peace with the world instead of changing it by violence) and negative ones (sometimes the world really does need to be changed, and you don't just have to accept things that make you miserable instead of working to fix them).

We can see a lot of that negative side in both the King and Siffrin. The King urges the party to be frozen at their happiest moment, because he can't wrap his head around the idea that you could make things even better instead of just being given something and praying you don't lose it. Siffrin falls into the natural rhythm of the script, and doesn't try to fight against what feels the most correct because this is how things are, why would he believe that's something he has the power to change?

(One big difference here is that Taoism also believes that change is one of the fundamental forces, that the world is constantly changing, whereas I think the Followers of the Universe would probably be a kind of narrative foil for the House of Change in canon, just for story purposes.)

(Sometimes things need to change, and sometimes you need to accept them. A healthier outlook probably finds a good balance of both.)

When the Change God tells Siffrin that his god "will never really talk to you", I wonder if a follower of the Universe who remembered more about their beliefs could have argued back that their god never stops speaking?

Through the flight of birds, the movement of clouds, the beating of your own heart- the Universe is speaking all the time. To live is to be in constant conversation with it.

It's fun and all the think the universe is being mean to Loop and Siffrin but tbh I like to think the universe is more apathetic than actively malicious. Real "a universe that doesn't care but people do" type of deal.

The universe is hard to grasp or even personify. According to the change god the universe can't even talk to its followers. It's so massive and incomprehensible it just can't.

Like... imagine you had to do something for one of the like octillion atoms that make up your body. You don't know this thing, you don't know it's situation, not really. It's kinda hard to pay attention when you're busy being... well perpetual existence. But it becomes just loud enough to hear. Hurts just enough to feel. But instead of squashing this thing like a bug you give it a crumb and simply move on.

But that also makes the whole "The universe leads and we must follow" philosophy very hilarious. Like the universe does NOT know what the little specks on this single planet are doing just like we don't notice how our cells move around in our body.

The universe isn't leading shit. It's giving you the tools to do it yourself. It's like when you ask your mom to drive you somewhere and she just hands you the keys and says don't wreck the car, except this "mom" doesn't comprehend that its kids aren't even old enough to drive (aka can't handle godly powers like timecraft)

[vampiilure]

close.

Summary: after not coming back on a supply run, Daryl gets nervous. He ends up going to look for you which does not turn out too well, but he wasn't going to let you rot out there.

Daryl Dixon x fem!reader

Genre: angst, hurt comfort, romance, slow burn, recovery

WC: 3513 

The yard outside the prison had grown quiet.

Too quiet for Daryl's liking.

He stood near the gates, crossbow slung over his shoulder, chewing at the inside of his cheek as he stared down the road like he could will you to walk up it. You were late- way too late.

Two nights gone, and you still had not come back from what was supposed to be a simple supply run to a gas station barely five miles out.

Rick had said to give it time. Maybe you got holed up somewhere. Maybe you were laying low. Even Hershel tried to calm him, saying there wasn't sense in throwing yourself into danger unless you knew there was still someone to find.

But they didn't get it. Not the way Daryl did.

You weren't just another body in the group. You were different. Tough. Quick. Smarter than most. You didn't just vanish, not unless something went real wrong.

So the next morning, he packed a bag, told Carol not to wait up, and slipped through the gate before anyone could argue. Didn't tell rick. Didn't need to. Just followed his gut, and the trail you'd left behind.

“Dumbass,” he muttered to himself, pushing through the tree line. “Shoulda gone with her.”

The forest swallowed him fast. It always did. But he was used to that. Used to moving through the trees like a ghost, eyes low, ears sharp. And now, every snapped twig made his skin crawl. Every blood smear on bark, every footprint half-buried in the mud, it was all he had.

He hadn't eaten in nearly a day. Didn't feel like it. Couldn't stomach much when your face kept flashing’ through his mind, pale and still and gone.

Couldn't let that be real.

By the second night, a cold rain started to fall. He didn't stop. Just pulled up the hood on his jacket, kept movin’. He spotted a crumbled fence half-covered in vines near an old maintenance building off the back road. Most folks would have passed right by it.

But not you.

He crept closer, crossbow drawn, eyes scanning for movement. That's when he saw it- blood on the concrete. A drag trail. Boot prints. One of ‘em was smaller than the rest.

His stomach turned.

He pushed the door open with a hard shoulder.

“Y/N?”

No answer.

He stepped inside, flashlight bean cutting through the dark. And there, curled up against the wall behind an old vending machine, you were.

You looked like hell.

Sweat-slicked skin, lips cracked, side wrapped tight with a torn up t-shirt soaked in blood. You blinked slowly at the light, too weak to lift your head.

“Shit,” he hissed. He dropped beside you, fingers twitching like he didn't know what to touch first. “You outta your damn mind?”

Your lips twitched into a faint smile. “Missed you too.”

He let out a breath, half a laugh, half a choke. “You're a damn pain, y’know that?”

You blinked at him, heavy lidded. “You came..”

“Course I did.” his voice dropped low, barely a rasp. “Ain't leavin’ you out here to rot.”

You tried to speak again, but your head rolled, and your body went limp against the wall.

That snapped him back into motion. He ripped open his pack, pulled out water, gauze, anything he had left. “Stay with me,” he muttered under his breath. “C’mon, girl. Aint like you to give up.”

He worked fast, cleaning the wound the best he could, wrapping your side with shaky hands. You flinched, whimpered, and every sound carved something raw into his chest.

When he finally lifted you into his arms, you felt too light. Like a whisper. Like if he held you wrong, you'd break apart.

He carried you back through the trees, every mile heavier than the last. You drifted in and out, sometimes whispering his name, sometimes not saying anything at all. He answered every time, even when you couldn't hear him.

“It's alright,” he murmured, low and rough. “Gotcha now.”

By the time the prison walls came into view, dawn was breaking. Orange light spilled over the yard. Maggie was on watch- eyes wide when she spotted the two of you stumbling out of the treeline.

“Open the gate!” she yelled.

Daryl didn't stop. Didn't speak. Just pushed through, jaw set tight, eyes locked straight ahead as he carried you past everyone and into the infirmary cell. Hershel took one look and nodded, telling him to lay you down.

But Daryl didn't leave.

He didn't say nothin’ to nobody as Hershel moved around the cell , getting supplies, asking quiet questions that he barely registered. He just stood there, jaw clenched tight, watching your chest rise and fall like if he blinked, you might stop breathing.

Once you were stable, far as Hershel could tell, he pulled up a chair, sat down beside the cot, and didn't move.

Hours passed like that. The light outside faded to gray, then dark again. The others came by in quiet bursts, carol, maggie, even glenn, but he barely looked at ‘em. Just gave curt nods and kept his eyes on you. Didn't matter what they said. You were breathing, and that was all that counted.

At some point, Carol brought him a tray, soup, bread, and water. He stared at it for a while before taking the water. Didn't touch the rest.

His mind wouldn't shut off. Everytime he looked at you, all he could see was your body slumped in that filthy shed, skin hot as fire, lips barely moving. He'd been two days too late. Two days where anything could have happened. Bitten. Torn apart. Left screaming and alone. The thought made his stomach twist, fists curl.

You were tough. He knew that. Hell, you’d made it back alive, hadn't you?

Still didn't stop the quilt eating through his insides like acid.

Should've gone with her. Sholda insisted. Shouldn't've let her go alone.

He looked at your face, the way your lashes twitched in sleep, brow creasin’ now and then like your dreams were heavy. There was a smudge of dirt along your temple, and a faint bruise on your jaw that made his hands clench all over again.

Daryl shifted in the chair, leaned forward, elbows on his knees. His voice came out low and rough, just above a whisper.

“Dumb as hell, runnin’ off on your own,” he muttered, eyes locked on your hand resting limply on the blanket. “Coulda got killed out there.

He swallowed har, shook his head.

“Thought i’d lost you.”

The words sat heavy in the air. No one heard ‘em but you- and you weren't awake to answer.

So he just stayed there, staring at you like he could hold you together with just his eyes.

That night, he didn't sleep. Not even when Hershel told him it was okay to rest, that you were gonna pull through if the fever stayed down. He just grunted and stayed planted in the chair, foot tapping now  and then, fingers twitching like he needed to keep movin’

Sometime near dawn, you stirred.

Not much- just a shift of your head, a small inhale through cracked lips. But he was on his feet in a heartbeat, hovering close, heart jackhammering in his chest.

“Hey,” he said, voice softer than it’d been in days. “You with me?”

Your eyelids fluttered. slowly , painfully, you peeled your eyes open, blinking at the blurry ceiling, then turning your head toward him.

“Daryl..”

He let out a shaky breath and dropped to one knee beside the cot, one hand hovering near your shoulder. “Yeah. S’me. you're alright now.”

You looked at him like you weren't sure if he was real.

“Thought i dreamed you,” you rasped.

He shook his head slowly. “Ain't no dream. I got you out. Brought you back.”

Your fingers moved sluggishly under the blanket, brushing against his. He didn't pull away.

Didn't know what the hell to do with the way that small touch lit somethin’ up in his chest.

“You stayed,” you whispered.

“Course I did.” 

His voice cracked slightly, and he looked away, jaw tightening. 

“Weren’t gonna leave you out there,” he added after a beat, quieter. “Ain't somethin’ i could do.”

Silence settled between you again. Not the bad kind. The kind that said everything that didn't need speaking.

Finally, your eyes started to close again, the exhaustion still putting you under.

But your fingers didn't let go.

And neither did he.

The days passed slow.

Your fever broke on the second night, and after that, it was like the whole prison exhaled. Carol brought clean clothes. Beth sat with you in the evenings and hummed soft songs. Herschel came by with careful, practiced hands and told you that with rest, you’d be alright.

But he never left.

He took laying on the floor next to your cot. Didn't say much- never did- but every time you opened your eyes, he was there. Carvin’ something into a scrap of wood. Making arrows. Watching you. Like he didn't trust the world to keep you safe unless he was staring it down himself.

And he didn't hover, not really. Just moved around you like gravity kept him in your orbit.

He brought you water, sometimes food if he thought you’d eat. Never asked how you were feeling. Just gave you things and muttered things like “Eat this,” or “Drink up.” and didn't wait for thanks. But you saw it in his eyes, the tension that only eased when your color started to come back, when your voice stopped rasping.

One morning, you tried to sit up by yourself.

Daryl was across the room, fiddling with the strap of his crossbow. You didn't get far, just pushed your elbow back under you and winced when pain bloomed sharp in your side.

He was beside you before you could blink.

“What the hell’re you doin’?” he snapped, one hand hovering over your shoulder, not touching, but close. “You ain't ready to be movin’ yet.”

You breathed through the ache, biting back a groan. “I'm fine. Just..stiff.” 

He gave you that look. The one that said you ain’t foolin’ no one.

“Coulda tore somethin’ open,” he muttered, reaching behind you carefully. “C’mere.”

You didn't fight him when he helped you ease upright, arms bracketing you like a shield. His hands were rough, calloused, and warm where they steadied your back. You felt his breath on your neck, and for a second, neither of you moved.

Then he pulled away like you’d burned him.

“Tell me next time,” he said, voice low. “Don't go pushin’ it.”

You nodded, watching the way he sat back down- arms crossed, foot tapping against the floor like he was angry, or nervous, or both. Probably both. That was daryl.

He stayed quiet after that. But later that night, when you were almost asleep, you felt the blanket get tugged up over your shoulders. His fingers brushed your arm just a second longer than they needed to.

You didn't say anything.

Didn't need to.

The next few days blurred together. You were able to walk again- slow, with help. And every time, it was Daryl's hand you leaned on. Sometimes his arm wrapped around your waist, firm and steady, keeping a sharp eye on everything around you. Like he thought the walls might crumble if he looked away.

And it wasn't just the help.

It was the way he watched you.

Not just checking to see if you were hurting. Not just keeping you safe.

It was something else. Softer. Quieter.

Like he didn't know what to do with the thing in his chest, the one that clenched every time your smile flickered toward him. The one that twisted when you winced, or leaned on him, or said his name too softly.

One evening, as the sun dipped low behind the watchtower, you sat outside in the prison yard with a blanket around your shoulders, trying to enjoy the fresh air. Daryl stood a few feet away, leaning against the fence, carving again. You could tell by the angle of his head that he wasn't really focused.

“You okay?” you asked.

He looked up, blinked like you’d pulled him out of something. Shrugged. “Yeah.”

You tilted your head. “You been sittin’ with me for almost a week. Dont think ive seen you sleep.”

He looked away, jaw working. “Ain't nothin’. Just keepin’ watch.”

“Daryl,” you said, voice softer now.

He turned to face you then, brows drawn, like he wasn't sure whether to be mad or embarrassed. “Ain’t ‘cause I had to,” he muttered, eyes flickering toward you and away again. “I wanted to.”

The silence that followed stretched, thick as smoke.

You felt the weight of it settle between you. Warm. Fragile. Dangerous. 

But you didn't break it.

You just looked at him, and let the words sit there- unspoken, understood.

He cleared his throat, shifted on his feet. “You cold?”

“A little.”

He didn't ask permission, just crossed the space between you, shrugged off his jacket, and laid it over your shoulders like it was nothing.you clutched it tight, breathing in the scent of leather and smoke and something that was just..him.

 He sat beside you, not touching, just close.

The sky above turned violet. The wind picked up. But you didn't move, and neither did he.

You weren't fully healed yet. Not really/. But the ache in your side had dulled to a whisper, and the weight in your chest had lightened now that you could breathe in something other than recycled air and antiseptic.

So when Daryl found you by the gates, hands on your hips, eyes scanning the trees like they were calling to you, he didn't waste time.

“Farmstead a couple miles out,” he said, nodding toward the road. “Ain’t been touched far as i know. Could use the backup.”

You tilted your head. “You askin’ or tellin’?”

He gave a shrug, shoulders rolling lazy under his vest. “You're comin’.”

You met his eyes, squinted in the sun. “You sure I can keep up?”

His lips twitched- just a little. “You fall behind, i'll carry your ass.” 

You smirked. “Promise?” 

He rolled his eyes and turned. “C’mon.”

That was all you needed.

The walk through the woods was quiet. No need for small talk. He didn't do it, and you didn't need it. The leaves overhead whispered in the breeze, dappled sunlight dancing over the both of you as you made your way along the overgrown trail. You caught him glancing back every so often- small flicks of his eyes, quick scans to make sure you weren't lagging or hurting.

You didn't say a word about it, but your heart caught every time.

The farmstead was all crumbling wood and broken glass. Crows perched on the fence posts like watchmen. Daryl pushed through the door first, crossbow up, body moving in that quiet, practiced way that reminded you just how many times he’d done this.

You followed close.

You cleared it together, him upstairs, you downstairs. The home was dead, empty. But there were cans in the pantry, a few usable blankets, a cracked bottle of iodine you knew Hershel would be grateful for.

He came down with a tired look in his eyes.

“Kid’s room up there,” he said low. “Still got toys on the floor.”

You didn't respond. Just rested a hand against his arm for a second as you passed by. He didn't flinch, but he did look at you like maybe that touch had said more than either of you could explain.

You thought maybe you’d head straight back. But instead of turning down the main road, he jerked his chin toward the woods.

“Gonna make camp,” he said. “There's a spot. Ain't far.”

You didn't argue.

The clearing was hidden, half-sheltered under a rock shelf, with a small ring of blackened stone where fires had burned before. Daryl got one started quick, the orange glow catching in the lines of his face as he crouched coaxing the flame with steady hands.

He didn't say much as he passed you a can of peaches and opened one for himself. The two of you sat close to the fire, your knees nearly brushing.

You watched him in the firelight, the sharp planes of his face shifting in and out of shadow. He was quiet. Had been the whole time since you left the farmstead. Not cold, just in that headspace he slipped into when he was thinking too much. 

“You always come here?” you asked.

He gave a small nod, eyes on the flames. “Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Used to be quiet,” he said with a shrug. “Could hear things comin’.”

You smirked faintly. “Not ‘cause you liked the peace?”

His jaw twitched. “Ain't about likin’ it. Just…was better than listenin’ to people talk all the damn time.”

You chuckled under your breath and let it drop.

The fire popped. A breeze pushed through the trees, rustling leaves just loud enough to remind you how far you were from walls and fences. You shifted your weight a little, brushing your knee against his, not on purpose, but you didn't move it either.

He didn't flinch.

“You ain't gotta hover like this all the time, y’know,” you said after a moment, not accusing, just saying.

Daryl leaned back a bit, resting his forearm on his bent knee. “Ain't hoverin’. Just makin’ sure you ain't doin’ somethin’ stupid like fallin’ on your face.”

You smirked. “Appreciate the faith.”

He glanced sideways at you. “Didn't say I didn't trust you. Just know how stubborn you are.”

That got a real laugh out of you, low and tired. “Yeah, well…you’re not exactly the picture of restraint either.”

His mouth twitched, like he was fighting a smile. But then he looked at you again, longer this time. Eyes unreadable.

“You didn't have to look for me,” you said.

“I know.”

“But you did.”

He didn't answer right away. Just poked the fire with a stick and watched the embers shift.

“Didn't sit right,” he muttered. “You bein’ out there like that. Alone.”

That was the most he’d say. You didn't press it.

Instead, you shifted closer. Not a big more, just enough that your shoulder touched his. His body stiffened for a second, then settled again.

You looked at him in the quiet. The lines around his mouth. The scars. The way he kept his eyes low like they were too damn sharp to use on anyone for too long.

He wasn't soft. Not in words. Not in the way he carried himself. But he was here. With you. Still.

“Daryl,” you said, your voice low, steady.

He looked up.

You didn't say anything else. Just leaned in slow, watching him the whole way. Giving him time to pull back. Time to shake his head or shut it down.

But he didn't.

You caught the hesitation in his eyes, like part of him still didn't believe it was real, but he didn't move away. Your hand came up, gentle fingers brushing the side of his jaw, just enough to feel the rough stubble there.

And then you kissed him.

It was careful at first- your lips barely grazing his, testing, uncertain. You could feel how tense he was, how still. But he didn't pull away. After a second, he leaned in, mouth pressing back against yours in that awkward, unpolished way that said he wasn't used to this. Wasn't used to being wanted. But he wanted you. That much was clear in the way his fingers curled against your hip, not holding tight, just resting there like he needed the anchor.

You kissed him again, slower this time, letting it linger.

His breath hitched. Not loud. Not dramatic. Just the smallest sound of something giving way inside him.

When you finally pulled back, his eyes opened slow, like he hadn't realized he'd close them. 

Neither of you spoke.

He looked at you for a long moment, then turned back to the fire, tossed in another stick like it was just another night. But he didn't move away from you. Didn't shift or pull back or put space where there hadn't been any.

“Should get some sleep,” he said, voice rougher than usual.

You hid your smile in the collar of his jacket.

“Yeah. Probably should.”

You stretched out beside the fire, and he stayed close, crossbow still within reach, body tense in that quiet-watchful way of his. But he stayed near. Close enough to feel the heat of him.

And even though nothing else was said, you knew that kiss hadn’t just happened by chance.

It meant something.

To both of you.

[mytortoisegotstuckinatupperware]

yes of course I was happy to get my adhd diagnosis at 20 for medication and definitely not because that meant I was one step closer to actually being a demigod

[luna-the-cretar]

I will never get over the fact that Daisys first impression of Skrimm was him bolting to the fireplace, stripping himself down to his underwear and plopping his happy ass down in front of the fire, while the rest of the party is breaking the news that her sister is dead and that they may all still be in danger of the thing that killed her sister

[luvism333]

cutest patooties to ever live omfg....... i love u clarianna

some details about my dr s/o annabeth chase!!

she thinks shes not much of a creative but my god she would make it as a poet im telling u.... type of person to say the most eloquent soul crushing tear jerking thing to her lover under the moonlight and not understand when u start crying

she journals!!! can and has and will cut a man for trying to read her stuff. she's very protective, but when she's sleepy or feeling sappy she'll tell me about something she wrote that she was looking back on

shes super like artsy too!! she doesnt think so but shes a huge film buff she knows alot about cinematography and has little profiles about her favourite directors, says things like mise en scene and motif. shes the type to read the books and analyse the differences between the film adaptation and the original. shes soo..................... film major fake deep pinterest boys wish they were her

okay maybe just my personal opinion but shes so fun to talk to. she just has so many thoughts youre never carrying the convo and whatever you say she really thinks about it, shes the type of person that listens to *listen* not just to reply you know

shes the biggest hate watcher alive i swear she just likes to watch things to get pissed off and plan out how shed execute the storyline better. tons of people think its annoying and cant watch things with her but i love it shes so funny and i love that she gets engaged in everything we watch

they call us the gingerbread dream team bc when we were kids we DOMINATED the camp gingerbread house competitions. she designed full on condos and mansions out of gingerbread and i decorated them to the max

she tries to act all tough but shes SUCHH a softie its insane. i made her watch me before you after i read the book and she cried and then wouldnt talk to me for 3 hours. DONT let the rbf fool you shes the type of gf to bring home 600 strays and beg u to let them stay

she tried to force herself to like classical music when she was a kid but she literally couldnt do it. it distracted her more than helped her focus and she spent like 2 weeks obsessively researching trying to prove that its not actually good for ur brain

shes sooo mf competitive and idc what anybody says i love it. u ask anyone else and theyll say they hate playing w her bc she takes it too serious but theyre just mad they always lose to her 🥱🥱

if i tell her i hate someone but i dont have a reason she immediately comes up with 46 reasons why we both hate them. like "idk why but he just rubs me the wrong way..." "he rubs you the wrong way because he's grossly incompetent and irresponsible with his finances-"

she doesnt mind parties but the second i want to leave she’ll drop everything to go. sometimes ill just be like “i cant wait to sleep tn” and she’ll be like “do you want to go? now? do you want to leave? we can leave. we will leave. say your goodbyes.”

me her n percy like playing video games together and every time we play a horror game she refuses to admit when she gets scared. she could literally fall out of her seat screaming for her mommy and she would be like “i was trying to catch you off guard so i could win its part of the plan you SIMPLETONS wouldnt get it”

she hates me shitposting on social media but is miraculously in my replies every time i post 🤔🤔 even if its just to call me a dumbass she never misses a status

she goes way too far with her insults sometimes and i always tell her off but ill never admit i think its hilarious. its always during serious arguments shes not casually mean but she'll be like "you have such an insane amount of blindspots it's no wonder why your girlfriend needed to see someone else"

lowkey a horrible influence w my charmspeak 😭😭 its her personal life cheat code ill be like beth dont u think i should learn some problem solving skills and she'll be like this is problem solving. solve our problem by charmspeaking us out of a speed ticket

i love it tho. literally everyone discourages any use if charmspeak bc theyre afraid, but annabeth knows me and she knows id never use it maliciously - she trusts me to use it for silly reasons even tho i shouldnt <33

laughs loudly and unashamedly when i trip or walk into things but if anyone else laughs its instantly not funny anymore

unironically a "dont talk to me until ive had my coffee" person. she drinks it black w no sugar.... freak

i dont talk when im upset (bc my charmspeak flares up) and she learned australian sign language so she still can talk to me. shes so incredibly talented and ambitious and thats her love language, she'd learnt literally anything for someone she loves <33

omfg my mortal family is OBSESSED WITH HER. shes so annoying she did so much research about our culture before she met them she knew all the right points to hit and exactly how to behave i swear my nan likes her more than me

im super super physically affectionate. even tho she isnt herself, since we were kids shes always let me crawl all over her like its nothing. like she lets me sleep in her lap while she researches or holds my hand while she barks orders, shes so used to it if i dont touch her for a day she assumes something is wrong

when we cuddle she complains that im too hot and trying to fuse myself to her skin, but if i try to move away she'll pull me back. def the type of girlfriend to trap you in bed in the morning because she doesnt want u to get up

she's an AWFULLLLL cook its so funny. in my dr my passion is cooking nd i become a chef so we're like the perfect match. she's good at baking which relies more on strict measurements and instructions, but with cooking meals she just flops. refuses to accept this flaw and wont stop trying to prove she can do it

she loooves my cooking tho (´ ω `♡) annabeth doesnt rly think much about what she eats so long as it has enough nutrients so i could serve her grey sludge and she'd eat it up n tell me thank you, but i take it as a compliment to my skills anyway

HOLY YAPPPPP sorry i went on for 60 years sighhh i just miss her...................

THANK U GIGS cutest post everrrrrrr ur so romantic + ASK ME ABOUT BETH!!

shifters; what are some little, random things you love about your s/o??

LOVERGIRLS (genderneutral) UNITE this is pretty much a safe space to ramble about your s/o tell me everything 🤭🤭🤭🤭 pet peeves they have?? romantic moments?? quirks? a tradition you guys have ANYTHING i got inspired seeing @hrrtshape's post about her & coryo and i thought it was so cute i love her acc some things i love about my s/o/clarisse! ❤ for me and i will die on this hill CLARISSE IS AN ARTIST SHE SECRETLY LOVES TO DRAW IM SORRY 😶😶

like i dreamt about it once and now it just makes sense. its like something clicked she WOULD be rlly good at drawing and find it therapeutic, and literally no one would expect it from her. she is insanely talented!! like she just has a natural knack for pencil sketching and it always looks so good meanwhile she'll be like 'this? that's just a sketch 🤷‍♀️' CLARISSE. she also likes to draw me sometimes 🤭🤭🤭🤭 this is my main headcanon/thing i love about her but i love her LOTS so here other stuff; ❤ when we end up becoming friends we find out we have a LOT in common and that includes liking the same foods so we both rlly love those sea salt caramel enlightened yogurt bars & everytime we somehow get a box of them stocked up in the big house (cause chiron won't buy food/junk food for campers meals but he will RARELY keep stuff in the fridge if a camper gets it) its like a death race to get the last one and it gets intense ❤ when we're kinda younger like in tlt era (good times) shes the type of person to talk like a corny 80s bully stereotype when shes mad. she grows out of it and even though i never bring it up later on, its something i ALWAYS think about LMAO. the 2000s are definitely a time because how did bullies take themselves seriously? 'your ass is grass and i'm gonna mow it!!! 😠😠' ..wrap it up 😭😭 will you guys unfollow me if i say im kind of attracted to it😞

❤ no, because she kind of looks like abby anderson.... IF YOU PLAY TLOU YOU KNOW!!!!!!!!!! ❤ she gets really clingy when she’s tired without even realizing it💞💞 as well as she lovesss having me play w her hair and touch it

❤ she always pulls me closer to her whenever we’re in the same bed or cuddling, she lays on top of me or puts my arms over her when she seeks comfort but she doesnt want to say anything ❤ TOUGH LOVE GALORE!! honestly she can be pretty blunt but its something i really appreciate and respect about her because even tho i dont like when she uses it to be hurtful clarisse is the one person you can rely on to tell you how it is & have your back regardless and i respect her a lot for that; especially when she starts to train me how to fight ❤ its kinda weird because its like for a while we don't rlly care/ know eachother on a deeper level even a little dislike for eachother BUT even then she always had a little affection and concern for me in small moments like when the cards r stacked against us or one of us is in trouble/danger. IMO it'll happen being somewhere with the same people for so long you're bound to care abt them building off this, one thing that i secretly love to do is plan for capture the flag with her and the rest of the cabins cause even if it doesnt always go well it's so fun to come up with strategies for our team & put aside everything we have between us to scheme LOL.

❤ BACK HUGS BACK HUGS BACK HUGS hugs in general are our thing and i know that clarisse has a hard time being affectionate so it means a lot whenever she is touchy with me 😭💓💓💓 she shows her love in her own way but rlly she's a big softie once she's comfortable with u ❤ my favorite colors are more cool colors like robin eggs blue/blue, periwinkle, seafoam green, lavender, pink/coral pink, and silver while hers are warmer colors like red and orange and brown and gold and bronze dark red and bronze are her favorites idk i just thought i'd point that out cause i didnt even plan this, its just something i noticed

❤ whenever i’m sad she always knows what to do to make me feel better aka hugs & hot chocolate

❤ she loves to pick me up toss me over her shoulder and carry me around like its nothing, shes sooo strong she always gives me a piggyback ride and carries me around camp💕 ❤ she gives me the softest kisses, she just melts into me, her hands cradling my face lovesick rambling over ✅✅✅✅ i rlly hope ppl see this and start writing about their relationship in their realities/dr and ofc ask me anything if u want to! like anything about my dr or my s/o like seriously i am LOVE SICK and i love rambling abt my reality *the spirit of clarisse possessing me* yeah so guys, rant about your s/o or ill pulverise you 😠😠😠 AND THATS NOT A THREAT ITS A PROMISE (i swear ive heard her say that before 😭😭 ⬇⬇⬇⬇

(tagging some of my mutuals but you dont have to talk abt ur s/o if you dont want to 💗) @luvism333 @ravinaaa @freewinnie @al3shifts @kikissdiaryy @beadelmare @lanathedoll @rorysshiftingdiary @virtualsnupi @lexidayne

[pixlmonkeys]

me when the. when the academics

[greasydumbfuck]

frank and his stupid girlfriend he hates

[lith-myathar]

.

[rodismancave]

.

[lindentea]

still my favorite episode. like, just... how so many clues had been building throughout the episodes, until this one dropped this huge context bomb and the dam broke as so many puzzle pieces fell together.

the ppl who complain that their dumb funny horny demon cartoon got ~too much about feelings~ never bothered to pay attention to foreshadowing, hints, or show-don't-tell details.

HAPPY OOPS-IVERSARY!

one year ago today, the helluva boss episode oops came out and changed our lives 💚 love you always

[bluelockmaniac]

"𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞... 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐭?!"

ft. itoshi sae, itoshi rin, michael kaiser, mikage reo, seishiro nagi, isagi yoichi, barou shoei x fem!reader

⭑.ᐟ synopsis. surprising your bllk husbands with creative pregnancy reveals!

content warning. fem, wife!reader. suggestive (pull-out game, baby fever, etc). pet names. teeny tiny bit of angst in kaiser's part. twins. nagi feigning ignorance. lots of kisses because yeah. 4.5k wc!

notes. heavily inspired by peachy pregnancy reveal videos on yt!

𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈 𝐒𝐀𝐄

you had never fought so hard to contain laughter in your life. 

it was a quiet afternoon, and you were resting on your bed when sae suddenly barged into your shared bedroom, looking slightly confused.

his brows were furrowed, and his lips were slightly parted. he had just finished taking a shower, water droplets dripping down his skin, and a towel hung loosely around his waist. 

but what really caught your attention was the pile of clothes draped over the bend of his elbow. clothes that you had instantly recognized.

“tsk,” he clicked his tongue in irritation, tossing the garments onto the mattress one by one. “the dumbass dryer shrunk my clothes.”

now laying on the bed were three tiny white shirts, a pair of tiny running shorts, and most importantly an identical replica of his football uniform, complete with sae’s name printed on the back. each piece looked unmistakably his, just tiny.

but little did he know that you had swapped his freshly dried clothes with their baby-sized counterparts while he was in the shower.

the uniform had taken the most effort as you had to customize and order it online rather than simply purchasing it in store, but the results were definitely worth it.

you pressed a hand to your mouth, a soft laugh escaping despite your best efforts to appear innocent. though it was a completely natural reaction for this situation, you doubt he’d find it suspicious. 

“that’s the first time that’s ever happened, right?” you crawled closer to inspect the small jersey. you held it up for sae to see, beaming at him. “but it’s so cute! don’t you think so too?”

sae glanced at your sparkling eyes, and rolled his eyes. he turned toward his dresser, shaking his head slightly. “it’s cute. give it to some fan at my next game.”

like hell you would. you hugged your knees as you eagerly watched him reach for his calvin klein boxers. he could feel your stare burning a hole through his head and turned to you with a raised brow.

“what? you that excited to watch me strip, mi cariño?”

you grinned and gave him a thumbs up. “yeah, i am. keep going, you’re doing great so far.”

sae sighed but you could see the tiny smile that was ghosting his lips. he pulled on his boxers, until he suddenly froze, his fingers stilling on the waistband of the undergarment. your smile widened.

his gaze darted between the tiny clothes on the bed and the neatly folded ones– his clothes– you had placed on his dresser.

“love.” he said quietly. he walked over to the bed, eyes locked onto yours as he climbed over you. he gently pushed you until your back met the mattress, his frame hovering over you.

“are you pregnant?”

you giggled. “maybe.”

his teal eyes narrowed slightly. he reached up and pinched your cheek. “answer properly. i asked, are you pregnant?”

a breathy laugh slipped past your lips as you nodded. “i am.”

for a split second, he just stared at you, dead silent. then, he let out a soft grunt, muttering under his breath.

“knew something was off. you’ve been acting weird.”

you snorted, “excuse me?”

he tilted his head slightly, his lips quirking at the corners. “didn’t say it was a bad thing.”

he leaned down. he kissed your forehead first, then the tip of your nose, and finally, your lips. when he pulled away, there was a subtle smirk on his lips.

“my pull-out game was shit.”

you laughed softly as you ran your fingers through his damp, reddish hair, your voice smug. “i don’t blame you. i just feel way too good.”

his smirk twitched as he flicked your forehead lightly. “don’t get too cocky or i might just have to plant baby number two.”

𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈 𝐑𝐈𝐍

“sir,” the police officer began professionally as he approached rin’s car parked in the public lot, tapping on the driver’s window. 

rin paused his conversation with you, casting a side-glance at the cop. he raised a brow before rolling down the window. “what?” he asked bluntly.

the officer leaned a little against the window frame, nodding his head respectfully. “i’m going to have you stop here. you have a child in the vehicle with no child seat.”

rin stared at the man like he was an idiot, then slowly turned to look at you, scoffing in disbelief. “get a load of this guy.” he muttered. you bit your bottom lip hard to suppress your laughter, fingers tightening around the purse in your lap.

turning his head back to the officer, rin narrowed his eyes. “are you a dunce? does it look like there’s a child in the backseat?” rin asked him with annoyance. “seems like they purposely hire lukewarm idiots who lack proper qualifications. you’re not fit for this job.”

“sir, i need you to calm down. it’s simply protocol. i’ll have to fine you.”

as your husband continued arguing with the poor officer who was actually only carrying out his part of your arrangement, you quietly retrieved the positive pregnancy test out of your purse. a warm smile graced your lips.

the officer, who was busy distracting rin, caught your movement and tried to mask the smirk that was threatening to appear. he played along, “ma’am, are you positive about this?”

that seemed to set rin completely off. “do you need to enter the car to see for yourself, you dumbass cop? i told you, there is no fucking child in this ca–”

“actually,” you interrupted sweetly, “we do have a child in the car with no child seat.”

as soon as he heard your voice, he stopped mid-sentence. rin turned to face you, only to find a pregnancy test held up in your hand, two pink lines etched clearly. his teal eyes flitted back and forth between your smiling face and the test, blinking slowly in realization.

“... you’re not joking, are you?”

you laughed softly as you shook your head. “no, rinnie. i’m pregnant.”

he stared at the pink lines for a while longer, then muttered something under his breath and reached to roll the windows up, shutting out the content cop with a glare. you shot him a quick nod of thanks through the glass before rin turned fully to face you. 

he already knew you’d be a perfect mother with the way you naturally loved and cared for him. as for him? it’ll take him some time to figure out this whole parenting thing.

“didn’t think you could surprise me anymore.” he muttered, threading his hand through his dark green hair as he leaned back against the headrest.

“i think you’ll be just fine,” you murmured softly as you leaned in and gently pried his hands away from his face, your eyes locking onto his teal ones. “but you better be nice to me, baby. i’m going to be extra sensitive from now on, you hear me?”

his brows furrowed slightly before he took your chin between his fingers, tilting your head up to look at him. “after you set this whole thing up with a cop– a male, no less? yeah, i don’t think so.”

“oh?” you teased, giving him a lopsided grin as you leaned closer. “is the great itoshi rin actually jealous? hm. it looks good on you.”

rin scoffed, but his grip on your chin loosened. “you’re my wife. mine. not his.”

you laughed gently as you took his hand and slipped it under your shirt, guiding it to your stomach. “you don’t have to remind me. i never forgot.”

his gaze softened as he felt the slight swell of your stomach, where the child he (unintentionally) created with you was beginning to grow. he looked at you calmly before resting his hand on the small of your back, drawing you in. rin’s lips ghosted over yours teasingly, but never actually meeting.

you huffed. “you’re a cruel man.”

a rare smile tugged at his lips as he pressed a kiss to your temple, then leaned away. silently, he reached across and buckled your seatbelt for you, probably his attempt at being a gentleman. he didn’t meet your eyes, but you could practically hear the smile in his words.

“let’s go home quickly,” rin said as he started the car. “we need to take advantage of the time we have left before you’re too far along.”

𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐑

it was christmas. coincidentally, kaiser's birthday as well. 

the two of you had just finished eating together, and now you were lounging on the couch, sitting comfortably on his thigh with his arm lazily draped around your waist. there were many gift bags of different sizes scattered on the fuzzy carpet– a couple big ones, a few medium-sized, and a particularly small one.

kaiser scanned the pile, his crystal blue eyes glinting as he turned to you with a smirk on his face. “hmm, you like me that much, meine liebe?”

you met his teasing stare with silence, then gently cupped his face and leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. you’ve come to learn that this method always catches him off guard, and as you expected, it did just that this time as well. his eyes widened slightly just slightly before his lashes fluttered shut. 

“ah.”

“i do,” you murmured against his lips, your voice airy. you pulled away with a content smile. “now hurry up and open them. i'm excited to see your reaction.” you leaned your head against his shoulder, fingers toying with the sleeve of his warm sweater.

kaiser reached for the first bag, tearing through the wrapping carelessly. “a pair of cleats, huh?” he raised a brow, looking at you with an unimpressed, mocking expression. “didn't need them. my cleats are brand new.”

your brows knitted together. “i didn’t get them because you needed them. got them because you suck at choosing anything that isn’t boring.”

“oh, you wound me,” he pinched your waist playfully before rubbing the spot soothingly. “i was just joking, liebe. promise.”

for the next half-hour, he continued opening the gift bags. brand new sunglasses, a watch, new cologne, a mirror since he loves admiring himself, and things of the sort. each gift was met with some sarcastic remark, but there was always a gentle touch here and an appreciative touch there.

then– 

“micha.” you tapped his shoulder, pointing at the relatively tiny bag sitting on the carpet near his feet. “you missed that one.”

his brow arched. he picked it up and placed it on your lap since your legs were swung over his. “didn’t see it. it’s so tiny.” he inspected it for a second before slipping his hand inside. he side-eyed you, chuckling. “why does such a tiny bag have so much wrapping anyway?”

you hummed, pressing a kiss to his neck before nestling your head back against his shoulder. “mm. dunno. maybe this one’s important.”

he pulled something out. and froze. 

you could almost hear his heart thumping in his chest as he slowly flipped the pregnancy test over in his hand. and there it was. two vertical pink lines.

positive.

an awkward silence stretched between you two. you let out a soft huff, gazing at him lovingly as you watched his reaction.

he didn’t say a single word for what felt like eternity. then, he turned to look at you. “are you serious?” his voice lacked his usual teasing.

“yes.”

“are you actually serious?” he repeated.

you laughed. “i’m positive. literally.”

“holy fuck.”

kaiser inhaled sharply, exhaling through his nose as he put a hand on his forehead and slumped back against the couch. he tugged you with him until you were sprawled against his chest. still, he didn’t speak. 

again, there was silence as you pulled a warm blanket over both of you and snuggled closer. you sighed blissfully against him, until something wet landed on your cheek. 

you blinked.

tilting your head, you tried to get a better look at him. but your eyes just widened.

“micha? … baby? … michael?” your voice softened, “my love, are you crying?”

you had never seen him like this before. the usual cocky arrogance completely gone, his jaw clenched as if he was trying to compose himself. then, without a word, he cupped the back of your neck and pulled you back into him to cover his face. his arms wrapped around you tightly, his lips pressed firmly against the top of your head in a long kiss.

“tch, stupid. of course not.” he murmured against your hair, breathing in your familiar scent. “our kid’s gonna have your smile. i already know it. and i’m screwed because that’s going to kill me everytime.”

and as he felt your arms tighten around his waist, he’d already decided he was going to be a better father for his child than his dad ever was for him.

𝐒𝐄𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐍𝐀𝐆𝐈

“sei, come onnn!” you whined, tugging insistently at your husband’s arm in an attempt to pry him away from his gaming chair. it proved to be ineffective as his eyes remained glued to the sniper game on his screen.

but the second you tugged just a tiny bit harsher, you threw off his aim, causing him to get shot by the enemy. 

“ah, shit,” he muttered as the ‘game over’ screen flashed before him, his broad shoulders sagging slightly. you felt bad, but only for a split second, so you quickly shook those feelings away— you had something important to reveal after all.

seishiro took off his headset with a dramatic huff, then swiveled his gaming chair to face you. his massive arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you in close until his face was buried against your stomach. “what is it, pretty?” he sighed into your shirt.

you grinned. “i need to show you something real quick.”

you didn’t give him a chance to protest, practically dragging his lazy frame out of the chair and toward the kitchen, with him following sluggishly behind you.

when you finally stopped, he glanced around, confused. “there’s nothing new…?”

you laughed and pointed at the oven. “open it.”

his brow arched with slight suspicion, but he did as you asked, crouching down and pulling the oven door open. he reached and grabbed the singular item sitting alone on the rack—

“a bun?” he questioned, his white brows knitting together as he stood back up. he seemed almost disappointed and you could only guess he assumed you had prepared him some lavish meal. but hey, you had already figured he’d be a bit slow and would need some extra help.

you bit back a giggle and leaned against the kitchen counter, a smile gracing your lips. “think about it, baby.” you encouraged, “could you tell me what you just found?”

it was almost cute how he was eyeing the bread roll that seemed almost miniscule between his fingers. “i found a bun… in the oven.” he repeated slowly. you watched as his droopy, half-lidded eyes went wide in what you thought was realization, until his lips parted again. 

“did we run out of food?”

you smacked your forehead. “are you dense?” you placed your hands on your hips and let out a semi-annoyed sigh. “it’s an expression people say when—”

you were suddenly cut off when he bent down, grabbed the hem of your shirt, and lifted it just enough to place a tender kiss on your bare stomach. “i know,” he murmured against the soft skin, and you could feel his lips curling into a slight smile. 

your breath hitched, warmth rushing to your cheeks as he straightened himself up and tangled his arms around you, pulling you into his chest.

“sei…” you whispered, raking your fingers through his snowy-white hair, still a bit caught off guard. perhaps he wasn’t as dense as he seemed. then, you shivered when his cold palm slid under your shirt and rested against your stomach. he quietly chuckled at your reaction, leaning down until his lips grazed your ear.

“i was actually suffering terribly from baby fever, so i’m glad i didn’t pull out.”

your mind short-circuited as you gawked up at him with widened eyes, but he only gently patted your head with a lazy smile. 

geez. what had gotten into him?!

𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐎

reo had just pulled into the driveway of his mansion after treating you to an extravagant dinner at a five-star restaurant, your first date with him in quite a while. he patted your thigh affectionately as he turned off his rolls royce, but to his surprise, you simply unbuckled your seatbelt and stayed seated, your hands moving to dig through your purse.

his eyes flicked to you and his lips curved into his signature smile. he figured you were just waiting for him to open the car door for you, the usual princess treatment he was all too familiar with. “right. being away in england for so long made me forget how much my wife loves getting spoiled.”

but before he could make a move to exit the car, your fingers gripped onto his suit, pulling him gently back to his seat. he looked slightly startled, and glanced back at your giddy face with a raised brow. his gaze dropped to the small, silver card in your hand.

“what’s this, baby?” he asked, turning his body towards you.

“a custom-made scratch-off card,” you replied, handing it over to him. “just scratch it.”

your heart was pounding against your ribcage as you watched him flipping the card over, examining it, before fishing out a coin from the cup holder.

“if that’s what you want, princess,” he teased, “though if it’s a lottery ticket, you should know i’m not exactly lacking in that department.” 

reo hummed as he started scraping at the surface. you bit your lip excitedly as the first bit of silvery dust flaked off, the image underneath beginning to reveal itself. his movements slowed, and his amethyst eyes widened as the layer was completely removed.

the sonogram appeared. 

reo’s fingers tightened around the card, a breathless laugh escaping him as he shook his head in disbelief. a grin stretched across his lips, looking at you in awe.

you were unable to hold in your breath any longer. you let out a laugh, tilting your head to look at him from a better angle. “well, reo?”

“i’m going to be a father?”

“what does the sonogram say?”

he chuckled lightly, running a hand through his purple hair as he let the card fall into his lap. “how long have you known?”

“since you left for england,” you said as you shifted happily in your seat.

he reached over, cupping your nape as he pulled you into a slow kiss. relief washed over you so quickly it made your head spin.

he pulled back, his forehead resting against yours as his hand trailed down to your stomach. “i wonder if it’ll be a girl or boy,” he murmured.

“could be both, actually.” you cut in, and he looked at you strangely.

“what do you mean?”

you grinned, gently brushing his jaw as you leaned back against your seat. “check the sonogram again.”

reo raised a brow, his curiosity piqued as he took the card back into his hand to inspect it. before long, his eyes widened comically as he saw a second fetus in the ultrasound.

“are you serious? we’re having twins?”

you laughed softly as you laced your arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. “that’s riiight. prepare to spoil me tenfold, reo. you’re going to be feeding three people in one body now.”

his arms instinctively wrapped around your waist as he pressed his lips against yours once again in a sweet kiss, still dazed by the realization that he’s going to be a father to not one, but two children. “... there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”

“good,” you whispered, smiling as you kissed the tip of his nose before leaning back into your seat. “start by opening the car door for your pregnant wife.”

“yeah, yeah. anything for my spoiled princess.” he replied with an excited grin, finally exiting the royce. needless to say, you were not going to lift a single finger during this pregnancy.

𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐈 𝐘𝐎𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐈

“b-baby, slow down!” isagi gasped as you shoved him towards the bedroom, kicking the door open and dragging him inside.

“on the bed, yoichi!” you ordered him with a grin on your face, watching with satisfaction as he reluctantly sat down on the edge of the mattress. he sighed with fondness, watching as you clumsily rummaged through the closet, before finally pulling out a blue shirt.

you walked over, placing the shirt face down on the bed to keep the words hidden. then, with no warning, you pushed his thighs apart, placing yourself between his legs as you reached for the hem of his shirt.

isagi raised an eyebrow, already amused. there’s nothing that should surprise him anymore with you, but somehow you prove him wrong every single time.

“are you trying to seduce me?” he smiled, lifting his arms with no resistance, allowing you to pull his shirt over his head.

you playfully smacked his chest. “trying? i already did, yo. you made it too easy.”

he rolled his eyes as his cheeks tinted a light pink. “whatever… you’re too cute.”

“close your eyes. no peeking while i’m putting this on you,” you said, grabbing the shirt off the bed. isagi’s eyes closed obediently, and he felt the fabric tighten around his torso as you slipped the shirt over his head.

“woww, you didn’t even get my size right,” he joked, opening his eyes but not looking down.

you whistled softly, letting your hand wander over your husband’s chest. “i know your size, but you just look hotter with a tight shirt.”

your fingers encircled isagi’s wrist as you dragged him across the room, excitedly positioning him in front of the tall mirror in the corner. “okay! read the shirt!”

he blinked, confused at first, then turned his gaze to the mirror, squinting his eyes as if that would help him decipher the reversed letters.

“be… nice to me… I’m going… to be a… fa…ther…?” 

he froze, the last word catching in his throat. his blue eyes snapped to you, wide and stunned. “i’m gonna be a father?? you’re pregnant? actually?”

you smiled and buried yourself in his arms, your fingers mindlessly tracing the letters on his shirt. “i’ve taken three tests. all positive.”

before you could say anything else, he hooked his hands under your arms and lifted you into the air, his forearm supporting your ass and his other hand on your waist.

“god, i love you so much,” he laughed breathlessly, “give me a kiss.”

still laughing, you cupped his face and gave him a sweet peck on his lips.

“another one,”

you leaned in, pecking his lips a second time.

“that’s not enough,”

“you lovesick idiot,” you sighed, smiling helplessly. you leaned in again, but this time, he met you halfway. his hand on the back of your head, holding you in place as he kissed you deeply. the gasp you let out was quickly swallowed by his lips.

he set you down as if he had not just stolen your breath away, patting your head affectionately.

“thank you, my love.”

𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐄𝐈

it should have been a normal day. barou should have followed his usual routine– wake up before sunrise, gel his hair, take a shower, and leave for his daily hardcore strength training.

but today was different. at exactly 5:12 a.m, barou opened his eyes with a low grunt and propped himself up with one elbow. instinctively, he leaned over to place a kiss on your forehead like he always did, only to stop once he was met with your wide eyes staring directly at him.

he scowled. “the hell are you lookin’ at me like that for?” 

he tried to blink his morning irritation away, then dragged a hand down his face before reaching out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “why are you awake?” his low voice was even more hoarse from sleep.

you groaned softly before scooting closer and snuggling against his bare, muscular chest. he let out a soft grunt, though his arm automatically wrapped around your waist.

“shoei… i’m hungry,” you mumbled into his skin.

“tch,” he clicked his tongue, pulling back slightly to look at you. “what, you want pudding? eggs? i’ll make something. i was getting up anyway.”

he rolled over and switched on the bedside lamp with a sigh, squinting to see you better.

but you shook your head and leaned forward, resting your chin on his shoulder with that sweet look he hated to admit always worked on him. “no… i really want pickle-flavoured ice cream. or a lotus biscuit with mayo on top…”

barou made a face. blinking at you judgmentally once, twice, and a third time before he placed a big palm on your abdomen and gently pushed you back onto the mattress.

“you’ve lost your mind,” he shrugged, tugging the blanket over you. he leaned in and pressed a kiss to your lips. “go to sleep. you’re talkin’ nonsense.”

but you whined, tugging at his sturdy arm. sparkly eyes looking up at him. “i’m serious, shoei… i really, really want them…”

barou narrowed his eyes. “why would you want to eat that garbage?”

“please?” you batted your lashes, “for your beautiful wife?”

he sighed, standing up begrudgingly as he scratched the back of his neck. “god, you’re annoying…”

your eyes lit up, and before he could turn away, you got up and wrapped your arms around his neck, peppering his face with kisses. “thank you!”

barou rolled his eyes and grabbed your cheeks between his fingers, squeezing them gently. “you’re a weird woman. suddenly craving crap combinations.”

you buried your face in his chest, nodding with a sheepish laugh.

he snorted, “what are you, pregnant or somethin’?”

as soon as he said what was intended to be a joke, you both froze. right… questionable cravings were a symptom of pregnancy.

“aha… y-you think?” you asked, laughing awkwardly. your eyes widen suddenly. “shit, my period is a few days late…”

his large hand silently found yours and gave it a gentle squeeze. “stay here. i’ll deal with the food,” he muttered. “and you’re takin’ a damn test after.”

you blinked. “what about practice?”

he didn’t look at you as he walked to the door.

“skipping. you always come first.”

—

“oi,” you heard barou’s voice from the other side of the bathroom door. followed by a light knock. “you okay? you’ve been in there for thirteen minutes.”

you opened the door slowly. he was standing there with his arms crossed, shirtless, with a towel around his neck. he looked at you with his usual stoic face. “well?”

you held out the positive pregnancy test with a meek smile playing on your lips. barou glanced at the stick, staring at the pink lines.

“...huh. guess this thing’s my fault.”

you let out a soft laugh, sniffling slightly. he pulled you in until your forehead bumped against his bare chest. his grip was gentle despite how rough his hands were. “we’re having a kid,” he muttered into your hair.

you smiled up at him, twinkly eyes, and his hand shot up to wipe away at the tears you didn’t know were falling. “don’t cry. i’ve dealt with two younger sisters.”

“i can take care of you.”

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