#whatever for me
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living life normally then youre reminded DID exists then you wake up
#for context DID tends to mask itself#since its purpose is to protect you from traumatic memories#its best to keep those memories hidden if youre hiding the alters that formed from that trauma too#so for the most part my brain is kind of a soup of voices and im just too busy irl to take the time and discern them#but once like DID is in my brain and im thinking or talking about it#then that pool separates and becomes more defined#i can then start to pick different voices out easier and notice change in my behavior or voice#this may not be universal#and i may not have DID im not exactly comfortable saying i have it#but i do dissociate and experience different states of personality#its really hard to explain properly#anyway when i first watched the moon knight tv show i freaked out when i think steven was having a breakdown first realizing he has DID#he said something that just triggered something in my brain it was so weird#sorry if this is heavy out of nowhere its kind of just#whatever for me#its interesting and can be kind of scary sometimes but i dont like struggle with whatever i have going on
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just another average day in gravity falls
#gravity falls#mabel pines#dipper pines#vocaloid#hatsune miku#my art#this looks kinda doodoo but whatever..>_<#edit: sorry this does not look doodoo that tag was a result of me staring at this for too long before posting lol
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space oddity
#fuckass triangle#making me feel bad for it#or whatever#the book of bill#gravity falls#bill cipher#gravity falls fanart#fanart#my art#salmonart
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some manga panel redraws for funsies
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#falin touden#marcille donato#namari#kanarii's art#redraw#cant believe it took me this long to finally draw namari 😭#its inconsistent but whatever
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When I was a kid, we moved into a house that had a huge lilac tree out front. It was mostly rotten, and it needed to be taken down before it fell. It took a while, but eventually, it was gone.
Mostly. A couple years later, little lilac babies popped out of the ground in its place. My mom was determined to get rid of them, because she'd planted a beautiful flower garden there, and the lilac trees would overshadow and kill the whole garden. I insisted on saving at least a few saplings. She said fine, but I had to dig them out and put them in pots myself.
So, I did. I spent days digging little lilac bushes out of the ground and putting them into pots. Some couldn't be saved, but some could. When all was said and done, I had five brand-new lilac saplings. Seven or eight years old, and it was my absolute pride and joy.
Three died due to sun scorching, severe drought that no amount of watering could save, and perhaps just being moved from their place in the ground. But two survived, and I was awfully proud of them! I'd go out and talk to them every single day. I watered them by hand and made sure they were fertilized properly. I learned all about their favored environments, and I was determined to make sure they lived.
One of my mom's friends saw what I was doing with the lilacs. She asked if she could have one to put in her backyard, and I agreed on the condition that she take very, very good care of it.
It's now fucking enormous. I'm talking ten feet tall and bursting with beautiful purple flowers every spring. My mom still gets updates each year as they start to bloom, which she forwards to me. And all I can think is, "That's my friend! Thriving some twenty years on, there it is."
The other tree nearly died, too. It lived in a pot for far, far too long. I wanted to plant it somewhere in my parents' yard, but my mom was reluctant. Eventually, we agreed to put it in the far back garden. It grew okay for many years, despite the shade, but in all these years, it's never bloomed.
Last year, the massive tree casting massive shadows over the lilac and the garden cracked in half and fell. It tumbled into the garden, crushing part of the nearby shed and destroying a few plants beneath it.
It missed my lilac by inches.
The clean-up is long done. The rest of the tree has been cut down, and my lilac has full sunlight for the first time in fifteen years. It won't bloom this year, I know. But it's got new shoots up. It's taller than ever. I spent half an hour a few weeks ago praising it for surviving all this time, dreaming about its future and telling it how I believe it'll become the tall beauty it's always been meant to be.
I think next year, I'll see flowers.
#aese speaks#a little personal story for you all#the origin of my life-long relationship with lilacs#i've been a garden witch since i was very small! (:#green witch#garden witch#garden magic#the lilac post#hello to everyone reading the og tags on this:#it's a metaphor it's a true story it's real it's fiction it's a poem it's me rambling it's whatever you think it is#30k
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[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled "immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]
a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”
#dinosaur#evolution#comic#prehistoric#animal#wildlife#paleontology#biology#poetry#comics#original#my art#archaeopteryx has no direct living descendants i know#but i wanted something aerial and the dinosaur to bird connection is classic and well known anyway#also the chicken over any other bird is very on purpose#its the mix of truth and comedy and genuineness and the fantastic in the mundane#its me asking you to see something so wonderful in something taken so un-seriously#and to love it both ways#also the jurassic park thing#where someone saw the reconstructed gait of a dino#and said. hey hang on. i know that walk.#and pulled up footage of a chicken walking#which jumpstarted the entire study into the link between dinosaurs and birds#in the end take whatever you want from it i just thought id provide some insight#i always like it when other artists do#the point is that i enjoy when people laugh at the end and when they dont#and i like it when they cry. i like it best when they both laugh and cry. eeaao intent#anyway mourn your losses but to live is to change#also hi guys i finally figured out tipping after 5 months so no more annoying ko-fi link#the antidote to despair is awe
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Haha whoops
#now technically this is a twins in time au situation here#but it also kind of looks like dipper which is also very emotional for me so#whatever floats your boat for this one guys#my art#gravity falls#Stan pines#Stanford pines#Stanley pines#ford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleauthor#twins in time au
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idk if anyone else felt this way, but in the Shapeshifter ep of Dungeon Meshi, it's treated like a joke that all the copies of Laios are super obviously not him, but isn't it kind of fucked up that Laios's closest companions don't seem to view him as... whole?
None of his companions had an accurate view of him as a person! One of the copies was a stupid, drooling mess! And on top of this, they all believed that because Laios struggles with social cues he wouldn't be observant to them as people. They just... fundamentally don't understand him.
I think the really accurate copies of the rest of the party was drawn from Laios's mind. His powers of observation and analytics are his strength, but that's not the same as being good with social cues.
Anyway. It made me really sad. I know his party cares about him, but it's so isolating to know your friends don't know you.
#i really didnt expect to feel so Seen by dungeon meshi#yes i do struggle to make friends and connect with other people why do you ask#and yes i often get reduced to whatever my current hyperfixation/special interest is#laios is me#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#laios touden
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10 years later
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushi#itafushikugi#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#least heterosexual group photo ive ever drawn tbh#u have the kings of subtle pda and their judgy lesbian third wheel#this does remind me a lot of the kind of art i used to do jhgdjghdfj#specifically that one furuba main trio piece i did forever ago. same vibe better art#anyway......i tried my best........ i tried so hard#i do not know how old they look . the goal was 25/26 but atp i've gaslit myself into thinking they look the same#especially megumi im so . throws hands in the air in defeat#but idk what else i can do cries at least i like it??? i think???????#i don't know!!! if they look younger than 25 whatever!!!!!!!!#why is it so hard fr me to make chars look older im gna slam my head against the door#maybe its fine. idc <- (lie)#in other news itfs are married fight me abt it . yuuji rockin the right hand ring fr Lack Of Finger reasons#also i am Eating nobara's fit . she might also look a bit younger than intended the more i look at her gDI why cant i have nice things#new hairstyle carrying tbh. i think she would a. grow it out and b. switch the side she parts it on to make Seeing easier#god just take it all tht really matters 2 me is low pony nobara and Rings On Fingers itfs#i did my time in yoi i know how to make wedding bands Work
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above all else a trans woman is a person. above all else a trans women is a woman who goes to the same grocery store as you and buys fruits in the same grocery cart as you and goes home and eats her dinner the same as you. above all else a trans woman is a woman who dresses like you do and talks the same way you do. above all else a trans woman is a woman who wants to be cared about the same way you want to be cared about and a trans woman is a woman who makes friends the same way you make friends. above all else you should care about trans women because they are people. treat her as such.
#pig originals#im so fucking tired. right now. let me know if something here doesnt make sense or whatever but god damn#its always the fucking singling out of transfem people i just. want everyone to have a normal life#i want everyone to have the chance to worry over their clothes or whatnot not whether. they're going to be respected as Actual Human Beings#i want us all to have the opportunity to live quiet happy lives forever#can we fucking do it!!!!! ahh!! ahh im going to explode
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also we fucked up as a society the moment we started telling teens and aspiring artists to conflate being an artist with building a brand as if the two things are inextricable. the name of the game if you want to share your art is to work a job and sell yourself as aesthetizied content. back in my day we could just POST SHIT. to deviantart! what the fuck!
#art stuff#take me baaaack#Sure there’s discord or whatever but it truly is not the same anymore. fur affinity is dead. deviantart is dead. art instagram as we know i#is dead. tumblr is dying. u can’t post shit on YouTube anymore if it isn’t highly produced and u aren’t trying to be A Youtuber
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Alligator tears 🦌 🥲
The beauty of the pumpkin head joke is that the true joke is TELLING the joke to people.
For those who don’t know it, this is the joke:
A man with a pumpkin for a head walks into a bar. The bartender exclaims: “My god, I’m sorry, but WHAT happened to your head?”
The man sighs and says, “So I found a genie in a bottle who granted me three wishes…”
Bartender: “Ok, well what were the wishes?”
Man: “Well, my 1st wish was for 100 million dollars. AND I GOT IT!!”
Bartender: “WOW! Okay…what was the 2nd wish?”
Man: “For the 2nd wish, I asked for the most beautiful woman in the world to fall in love with me…AND I GOT THAT TOO!”
Bartender: “Incredible! So then…what was the 3rd wish?”
Man: “Now see…that’s where I really messed up…
I asked for a giant pumpkin head”
#trust me if you tell the joke to someone#you will understand why it is so funny hahahaha#or you’ll think I’m crazy#BUT WHATEVER HAHAHA#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin hotel fanart#my doods#charlie morningstar#Vaggie#angel dust
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rich boy get your ass up and FIGHT!!!
[1st year au]
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#satosugu#stsg#sugusato#sgst#gojo satoru#geto suguru#first year satosugu#fanart#mika's art#i hope you can all read the ‘at least help me at a distance with your blue orb or whatever’
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i would say that, mentally speaking, i'm in a good place right now! physically of course, the crows continue their chanting,
#'weaving spells with beaks and talons' whatever u wanna call it. sounds like chanting to me#anyway yes. that is a thing that is happening#yes i am aware of it. stop asking.#am i taking steps to stop this thing from happening? how. how the fuck do u suppose i should go about doing that?#yea i've done some dumb shit in my life#no i am NOT about to go INTERFERING with the CROWS
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Fuck it
If this post gets 30k notes I'll ask to go see a therapist.
#switch the dragon#switchthedragon#switch rambles#the number is high for a reason#I don't wanna ask lol#but whatever you guys can convince me if you want#I've never been to therapy#i take pride in that fact
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We're not appreciating the Weird Barbie enough. It's said in the movie that she helps everyone who need help while they always see her as someone who's not as good as them. She was friends with all dismissed Barbies and Kens, was there to offer support and safe shelter for everyone who needed it in Kendom, without her nothing in the movie would've been alright. When Stereotypical Barbie calls her "ugly and unwanted" she still helps her.
She was representing a woman in women's world who was pushed aside by other women because she didn't fit in but still had more wisdom and kindness than everyone who thought they're better than her.
#weird barbie#barbie#Barbie movie#everyone looks at her as a queer person i see her as me I'm a straight person who got bullied simply for being different than the rest#but it's beautiful that we all see ourselves in her whatever our story is#cuz that's the point of characters like her#i changed wisness to wisdom sorry english isn't my first language and i forgot which one is more correct
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