#what this guy is doing ruling the company?

[yanderedrabbles]

Yandere Days of the Week

Monday is your grouchy and uptight coworker. He's a stickler for the rules and not someone who confesses his feelings. He'll usually push his spectacles up his nose and frown at you whenever you try and do something new, no matter how simple.

"What did I say about filling out the spreadsheets by yourself? You've confused all the figures."

He'll push both you and your chair out of the way and settle himself at your desk like one messed up spreadsheet means the death of the whole company. If you ever try and thank him, he'll glare at you like you've insulted his whole bloodline.

"Tch. Just ask me next time."

If you pay attention, you might notice the blush that tinges his cheeks whenever you smile at him. You might notice the way he straightens his already perfect tie before coming over to harangue you about company dress code and your slightly-too-short skirts. (Why is he noticing your skirt length to begin with? Perv).

Luckily for him, you're usually too irritated or harassed to pay attention. His secret crush will be staying a secret for as long as he can manage.

Tuesday is your overly sweet neighbour. He introduced himself to you the second you moved in - offering you a tupperware of homecooked food because he knew exactly how overwhelming moving in could be. He's the guy you call when you need a shelf hung up or a stubborn jar opened. He'll raise his brows when you thank him, secretly pleased that you asked for his help.

"That's what neighbours are for, right?"

He doesn't mention that the previous tenants left him a spare key to your apartment. What if you get hurt one day while you're locked inside, with no one able to reach you in time? It's safer for you both if he keeps it a secret.

And if he occasionally let's himself into your apartment while you're at work, it's just to keep an eye on the place. It's what any good neighbour would do. So stop wondering what the white stains on your panties are, okay?

Wednesday is your unassuming classmate. They're the quiet kind, apt to fade into the background without meaning to.

At first, they were envious of you. Pretty, clever, friendly - you aren't the type people can easily ignore. They watch you whenever they can, desperate to somehow copy that elusive charm that makes you so special.

It doesn't work, obviously. When they try smiling like you it looks stiff and unnatural. When they copy your outfits they feel exposed, self conscious. When they try wearing the same perfume as you they break out in hives that last all week.

They can't be you. No one can.

But they aren't going to give up so easily. Maybe your luck doesn't come from clothes or hair or makeup. Maybe it's something deep inside of you, something that can be ripped out and kept for themselves.

They're going to learn what makes you so special, even if it means following you home with duct tape and chloroform.

Thursday is your favourite professor. He's the quietly confident type, the kind of man who doesn't have to shout to keep the lecture hall's attention. He's insightful and empathetic, his brown eyes always warm.

You trust him totally and completely. You don't notice when he starts resting his hand on your lower back whenever you stand next to him. You don't notice that your papers are always graded more harshly than your classmates. You don't realise he wants you, not even when he offers you private office hours despite his packed schedule.

You're a real cock tease, always looking at him with those doe eyes and pretty lips. He's a patient man - he'll have you eventually. It doesn't matter if it takes him two weeks or two years, he'll keep dropping your grades until you beg him for help.

You trust him. You really, really shouldn't.

Friday is the star athlete that everyone admires. Handsome, confident, clever. A man like that would usually invite envy, would get dirty looks thrown at his back and nasty surprises in his locker.

Not him though. Everyone loves Friday.

Well, everyone except for you. There's something about him that frightens you. Underneath his golden boy facade, there's something rotten and selfish.

You don't realise he's noticed your dislike until he corners you after class one day. He wraps one hand around your wrist as everyone files out of the lecture hall, too eager for the weekend to notice the slightly panicked look on your face.

"Listen, I hate to think I've done something to offend you. If I have, just tell me now and we can sort it out," he tells you, blue eyes cold and distant despite his pretty boy smile.

You tug at your wrist but his grip is unbreakable. He isn't hurting you, but his strength keeps you right where he wants you.

"We barely even know each other," you say, your eyes jumping to the door and the suddenly empty corridors. "I don't have any issue with you."

"That's a lie and we both know it. I don't want to push you, but I'm not letting you go until I know what I've done."

You finally meet his eyes. "You have it too easy in life. You get everything you want. I don't hate you. But I don't like you either."

His expression is a careful blank. "I'm not going to apologise for what I have or for what I've been given."

You tug at your wrist again and he finally let's you go.

"I don't expect you to," you mutter as you swing your bag over your shoulder and hurry out the door.

He watches you leave and inside him some selfish, possessive creature lifts its head and growls. You should have known - when a man with everything he could ever want is shown something he can't have, that just makes him want it all the more.

"Gonna make her mine," he says to the empty classroom. A promise or a threat, even he can't be sure.

Saturday is a party girl. The kind of bombshell who wears a tiny metallic bikini, a cowboy hat and absolutely nothing else to a rave.

She knows every kind of cocktail and every kind of fun time pill. She's shamelessly cocky and shamelessly outgoing. When you run into her at a concert, she'll get you all the way to the stage no matter how packed the crowds are. 

You'd think a girl like that would know all about boundaries and consent and you'd be right. The thing is, she ignores it just as easily as she ignores speed limits and DUI citations.

She'll kiss you when you're too drunk to say no. She'll give you pills that she knows you can't handle just to take you home. She'll ignore you when you try and push her away, weak and intoxicated and too woozy to form a full sentence.

And the worst part? She knows you won't report her. Girls can get drunk and touchy without it ever being called a crime.

She'll run her hands up your thighs and nip your neck and tell you she loves you. But she's always long gone by morning.

She's just a girl, your honour. And she'll use that excuse as many times as she needs to.

Sunday is your local barista. He's an artist on the side, the kind of creative soul who can't express himself without the help of charcoal and acrylic.

He's too stoic to ever work the cash register or take orders, but he somehow always ends up there when you're in line.

He usually sneaks an extra sweet treat into your order. And if he has the time, he'll usually leave a little doodle on your receipt.

He hasn't spoken to you much, but he can feel the red thread of fate tugging you closer everyday. You're soulmates, lovers meant to be, fated by heaven and all its angels.

It doesn't matter how long it takes, you'll be his eventually. He can read it in the stars.

[gangstalkerbarbie]

Yes, you don't owe anyone your time and intimacy. These things are freely given to people whose company you enjoy. They're not a reward for performing the mechanical actions of courtship correctly, they're a logical consequence of two people mutually liking one another on a profound human level. Courtship is a game between two people who already like each other, and the thing is that there is no reward, the reward is getting to spend socially sanctioned time together that could lead into nesting and raising children. The win condition of dating is a pair bond capable of weathering life and maybe sustaining childrearing, which for most people involves sex because it's fun, bonding and is what leads to children. The win condition of dating is not mechanical sex for mechanical sex's own sake.

The thing that progresses dating into greater seriousness is therefore also not a kiss, not a handy, nothing — you can do all of that with whoever you're dating, I don't care, but call me a boomer idk, the period of time that you're in love is supposed to be safe and fun for both parties. The progression of a relationship is about trust, which dies instantly the second dating is no longer both fun and safe.

If feeling safe and having fun does not, in your heart of hearts, include being alone together or handies or head for you (and let's be honest with ourselves, it often doesn't, no one really thinks these kinds of risks to her reputation and human value are fun and safe; when girls engage in these behaviours it's because they live in a bizarro world where for some reason horny boys are allowed to set the rules of mate choice and girls are taught to value being wanted above anything else), that should be respected. If it isn't, stop dating this person.

Lack of willingness to respect women's nonconsent (and telling you not to be a prude is, in fact, disrespect) leads to rape, which used to often lead to children out of wedlock whose lives were doomed to be miserable, which is why so many patriarchal cultures wrote not being in private with unwed women into ritual or customary law and usually tied in metaphysics.

Even back then, people knew that rape can be a profound sociological trauma with very far-reaching consequences and wanted to keep their children from experiencing it, and their grandchildren from living whatever life these circumstances gave them. Not everyone alive in a prevailing social climate agrees with it, but they do all know what the consequences are for acting like it doesn't exist.

And after marriage too, you may not always have the right to say no, but on principle you deserve it just by existing as a human being. No still means no even with a ring on it.

I would (and I have) stop talking to a guy even at the implication of any entitlement to sex; in my culture it's normal to be a virgin until 24 or older nowadays, because marriage is a very long commitment, and sex is always a risk for the woman, and no shit she has the right to discretion. If he wants to gently try to wheedle or pressure you into sex while you're still reasonably in the public eye as a distinct person now, imagine what he'll do when you're married, you're in private together with no witnesses all the time, and his grandma thinks he's entitled to it!

He's not entitled to fuck or damn, but marital rape is much harder to get any recourse for than rape, comma, vanilla (which itself is the farthest thing from a picnic), and not everyone who blogs on the internet has a right to no-fault divorce. Universally applicable advice: either the man you're with is capable of understanding that no means no, or you just don't get into that position with him to begin with. If he has bad vibes, don't give him a chance, leave. If he says or does some weird shit, don't give him the benefit of the doubt, leave. You are always morally in the right for leaving and telling everyone about why.

There may be very little you can do once you're too far in — I'm not saying you shouldn't have the right to leave a bad marriage, I'm saying a lot of people wake up one day to find they don't — so if at all you can choose whether you end up in that position, do everything in your power not to.

There should, also, in principle be standards you should be able to hold men to. Leave if they refuse to be held to standards; they do believe in standards even if they claim not to, just standards only for you. You want the guys that believe sincerely in standards for everyone that you also believe in.

They will be hard to find because their path is thankless and often also considered to be cringe or even juvenile (because very young boys don't know they're supposed to want to hurt women yet, not wanting to hurt women is widely perceived as naive, feminine or infantile among men), but it's the only way to safely be heterosexual. If you need a man (I'm a lesbian but I have brothers I love who feel they need women, and I know full well that it is possible to feel you need a man), pick a good one.

You may be waiting until you're 30, even 40, but the good news is that gives you time to make nesting money and learn who you are, so, you know, different time periods, different priorities.

Secrets of the mothers of Israel or whatever, special for Tumblr: make good choices about your box and hold the men in your life to standards. Otherwise they will make up bad one-sided standards to hold you to and make your stupid box choices for you.

The social coercion women face to date people they’re not attracted to is fucking insane. I remember distinctly thinking “well, I can just force myself to be attracted to him…”

Films, books, etc, all show the trope of beautiful woman and unattractive man. There is still the myth that an unattractive man will treat you better than an attractive one (more women are waking up to this, but still). Even now the left thinks that activism happens between the legs of women.

Don’t date people you’re not attracted to. Don’t feel guilty for not giving them the time of day. No means no.

[jjkarmy091]

The Boyfriend Game- Jungkook (finale)

-> synopsis: You never thought that fighting for a position in JV's team would end up with you falling for the guy who was helping you out with it, especially since he had the same rule as you: no date, no romance, just socceer

> pairing: Soccer playerJungkook x (f) reader

> genre: romance, strangers to friends to lovers; angst; fluff

> word count: 8k

Monday was the worst day of my life. Jennie ignored me all day and Sana tried to be neutral. Practice was the worst. Jennie knocked me to the ground three times and played the best I’d ever seen her play. Even with how much I’d improved during the time I’d been practicing with Jungkook, she was still better than I was. I was peeling my face out of the dirt for the third time when Sana squatted next to me. “You okay?” 

“Great.” I spit some grass out of my mouth and sat up. 

“You might want to apologize. That would help.”  

“Apologize? I was trying to help her!” Sana picked something out of my hair and tossed it on the field.  

“Well she doesn’t see it that way.” 

“Gee, you think?” She looked past me. “Especially when Tae showed up to practice again to watch you.” 

“What?” I twisted around to peer behind me. Sure enough, Taehyung was  lounging on the sidelines, wearing his Nike shades and his usual jeans. Jimin was standing next to him, kicking his toes in the dirt and shooting periodic glances at Sana. Those two really needed to get together. 

“Great. Like that’s all I need is to have Tahyung here to bug me . . .” But as I studied him, I realized he wasn’t looking at me, he was in fact studying the field where the action was. I turned to look in the direction he was gazing and my heart skipped, he was looking at Jennie! No way. But he definitely was. 

Grinning, I stood up and dusted myself off, watching Jennie sprint around like someone had given her a bad haircut and ruined her life. She had no idea Taehyung was watching her. She was simply being a pain in the butt to destroy me. 

“What are you looking at?” Sana asked. 

“Taehyung’s here to see Jennie, not me.” 

“Nuh-uh . . .” Then she faded to quiet as she saw what I was seeing. “Wow. 

She has no idea. I’ll go tell her.” I grabbed her arm before she could move.  

“No. Taehyung only liked her when she forgot about impressing him and stopped being a stupid, flirty girl. If you point it out, she’ll go all weird on him again.”  

Coach Merrill blew her whistle, signaling the end of practice and I saw Jennie shoot an evil glance at us before marching over to help Coach round up the soccer balls. My jaw tightened when I saw her chatting up the coach, she never talked with Coach. Ever. She was doing it just to get on the team just to displace me from varsity.  

“I never tried to take him from her, but she’s for sure trying to steal my dream.” Sana shot me a look but said nothing. What could she say? She knew I was right. 

As we watched, Taehyung sidled up toward Jennie and started helping her pick up the balls. She jerked her gaze toward him, then grinned, then said something and he laughed, his gaze latched on to her face like she was all he needed to survive. I pressed my lips together at the sight of their little bonding.  

I wanted Jungkook to look at me like that just one time. I wanted him to walk up and be all cool and casual even after finding out that I liked him. 

“Look at that. Tae ditched Jimin. You think I should go keep him  company?” Sana was watching Jimin with the most pathetically wistful look on her face I’d ever seen. 

“Yeah, you should. Go talk to him.” 

“Okay.” She nodded once, ran her fingers through her hair and then trotted over to him. He gave her a shy but totally adoring grin when he saw her approaching him. I stood there, alone, watching my friends make these guys smile, and I knew what I had to do. I marched over to “our” field and there he was, kicking goals while he waited for me. Enough! He was adorable and funny and talented and I simply couldn’t take it anymore. Jungkook glanced over at me and grinned.  

“Hey.” I took a deep breath and walked toward him. His smile faded.  

“What’s wrong? You look ticked off.” 

“I can’t practice with you anymore.” He frowned.  

“Why not? This is the big week. Crunch time.” 

“I know, but I’m going to do it on my own.” His frowned deepened.  

“Why?” 

“Because I am.” I started to turn to leave, then hesitated at the look of confusion on his face. Over the last couple of weeks, he’d become my friend and I owed him an explanation of some sort. It wasn’t his fault he was an idiot, so I caved. “Here’s the thing, Jungkook, that kiss was way out of line.” He grimaced.  

“But I said it didn’t mean anything.” 

“Exactly.” A little furrow formed on his brow.  

“So?” I shook my head, not quite willing to actually lay it out there. I mean it was one thing to hint at it, it was another to announce I liked him and I wasn’t interested in being treated like a leper from the guy I considered my friend. 

“So you changed the rules when you kissed me and I can’t go back.” He cocked his head.  

“Why not?” I poked him in the chest.  

“Because you’re wrong. A girl and a guy can’t kiss on the lips and have it mean nothing, okay? Not a kiss like that.” He stared at me as a look of shock started to fill his face.  

“Are you saying that you liked my kiss?” 

“That’s not the point!” 

“But did you?”  

“Forget it!” I threw my hands up in the air and started stalking back toward the gym. I could not have this conversation. Jungkook was beside me in, like, one second.  

“Can you stop walking for one minute? We need to talk.”  

“What’s there to say?”  

“Do you . . . like me? Like, like me?” he asked. I heard the hesitation in his voice and I bit my lower lip. This was it. The end of our friendship I could already feel him drawing away. I took a deep breath, steeled my resolve and then turned to face him. His eyes were wary and he wasn’t touching me. He looked so cute, so awesome and all I wanted to do was say yes, to tell him the truth. He took a step backward, away from me. “Do you?” 

I lifted my hand and he flinched and backed up another step, in case I was planning to touch him. My throat tightened up but I had my answer. There was only one response I could give him if I had any pride, so I set my hands on my hips and met his gaze.  

“Jungkook, I think you’re a great soccer player and I enjoy hanging out with you, and yeah, I think you’re a decent kisser.” His skin took on this greenish tinge and he shifted his weight, shoving his hands deep inside his pockets “But quite frankly, you’re not my type.” 

Relief cruised over his face making me want to bury my head in a pile of leaves and cry.  

“That’s great.” He chucked me on the shoulder. “You had me worried for a minute. Don’t mess with me like that. I can’t take it.” 

I started walking toward the gym again, noticing that Jennie and Sana with their boys were hanging out in a little foursome by the field. I could hear their laughter and it made me feel even more alone, so I shot Jungkook a haughty look.  

“You’re delusional if you think I could ever be interested in you.” I laughed even as my heart was breaking into tiny little pieces. The varsity girls were walking in the opposite direction of me, toward the field. I wanted to be with them. If I were with them, Jungkook wouldn’t matter anymore. His shoulders relaxed at my words and he fell in next to me as I walked. Then after a minute or two he cocked his head.  

“What’s so wrong with with me?” I rolled my eyes while I tried to come up with a reason that he’d believe. 

“Because . . . you’re like a girl.” His eyebrows shot up.  

“What? ” I coughed to stifle a laugh. “You’re like one of my girlfriends, except you like sports as much as I do. I can talk about anything with you, and we have fun and stuff.” I nodded. “Yep, you’re like a girlfriend with hairy legs.”  

“A girlfriend with hairy legs?” he repeated, his voice slightly elevated. 

“Yeah. And you smell worse than girls after soccer, but other than that, it’s pretty much the same.” I had to turn away from the look of horror on his face so he didn’t see me crack up. Pride salvaged, I guess. I yanked open the door to the gym and he grabbed it as I stepped inside. He was looking at me, like he couldn’t quite figure me out.  

“You’re some kind of piece of work, Y/n.” I managed a cheeky grin that I didn’t believe.  

“With compliments like that is it any wonder you’re like a girlfriend to me? That’s not the kind of thing a guy would say to a girl.” He frowned, but didn’t reply. Inside all I wanted to do was shrivel up and die. It was over between us, we’d kissed, it had been awesome and he still wanted to run away from me. The only thing that salvaged our relationship was the fact I’d called him a girlfriend with hairy legs, how truly pathetic. I stopped outside the girls’ locker room, where I could hear my teammates laughing and giggling.  

“I gotta go.” He grabbed my arm before I could open the door.  

“Why? Why are you ditching me this week? Just because of a kiss? I don’t get it. I didn’t think you were the type to get all worked up about things like that.” I looked at him with his brown hair all messed up and his intense brown eyes and for the first time wondered what I was doing liking him.  

I mean, seriously, should I really waste my time liking a guy who would freak out at the thought of me liking him? A guy who hadn’t noticed I was a girl even after I was dressed like a total babe on Friday night? It was time to stop liking him. I deserved more than to have to spend time around him, watching every word I said in case I scared him off being miserable because I couldn’t stop liking him and he didn’t like me.  

“Oh, I’m a girl, Jungkook. You were the one who didn’t notice.” Then I shoved open the door to the locker room and let it slam shut in his face.  

The next two days were even worse. I avoided Jennie and Sana and ducked into the bathroom once when I saw Jungkook walking toward me when I was on my way to English class. I arrived at the last second to classes and took off at the first minute the class was over, so Jennie and Sana wouldn’t have to make up a reason not to talk to me. 

I went to practice. I busted my butt. I tried not to notice Taehyung and Jimin there, cheering on Jennie and Sana. I didn’t go to the field where Jungkook and I used to practice, I wanted to sneak over to “our” field to see if he was waiting for me. I wanted to, so badly tho. 

But I didn’t. I couldn’t.  

Hanging out with him right now . . . I couldn’t take it. The thought of spending time with him and not having him even acknowledge I was a girl . . . it was just too awful, so I talked my mom into buying me a bunch of cones of my own and I took a couple of balls and cones and practiced at the middle school on Tuesday and Wednesday.  

It sucked, I was so lonely, but I wasn’t about to give up on varsity and I couldn’t bear the thought of all my friends and Jungkook seeing me by myself, like some pathetic loser, so I was a pathetic loser in private. Much better. 

I was so bummed out that it didn’t even help when my dad stopped by the house to drop off new cleats for me. I knew my mom must have called him and told him how miserable I was, so he’d brought the shoes. 

All it made me do was think of Jungkook—how he’d said that my dad probably really did care but was just too busy. I needed my dad, and he’d delivered, just like Jungkook had said. 

Wednesday night I was sitting on my bed, picking grass out of my new cleats and I thought of calling Jungkook to tell him that he’d been right about my dad. Jungkook would want to know, he’d be happy for me. I picked up my phone and pulled up Jungkook’s number, stared at it, then hung up. Polished my cleats. Eyed my phone. Opened it again. Pulled up. Opened it again, pulled up Jungkook’s number and then I hit send. 

Then I disconnected and threw my phone on my pillow. I needed to stop obsessing! It rang five seconds later and I dove for it, my heart jumping when I saw it was Jungkook. I flipped it open. 

“Hello?” My voice sounded breathless, and I cringed. 

“Did you just call?” I flopped back on the bed at the sound of his voice. Deep, soft, perfect. 

“Yeah. I was just going to tell you that my dad surprised me with new cleats for tryouts on Friday.” 

“That’s awesome.” I could hear the smile in his voice and suddenly I felt totally upset again. I so wasn’t over him. “See? Nothing to worry about, Y/n.” 

“Yeah.” I twirled my hair around my finger. “So, that’s it. I’ll, um, talk to you later.” 

“Wait!” I put the phone back to my ear.  

“What?”  

“Listen, Y/n, I screwed up with the kiss thing and I’m sorry.” I said nothing. What was there to say? He groaned and I heard something crash like he’d kicked something over. 

“Come on, Y/n, can you cut me a little slack? I want to be friends. Can’t we be friends?” Friends. What an ugly word.  

“I don’t think so. Not right now.” 

“Give it tomorrow. We’ll practice and see how it goes. You do want to make varsity, don’t you?” I pressed my lips together and nodded, then remembered he couldn’t see me.  

“Yeah.”  

“So, let’s do it. You need me.”  

“No.” I lifted my chin. “I don’t need you, actually. I think I have to do it on my own from now on. If you want a friend, go hang out with Winter, I’m sure she’d be happy to kiss you and have it mean absolutely nothing.” And then I hung up and tossed my phone aside. I deserved more than what he could give me and I didn’t need a pity practice from him. 

I was wearing my new cleats and walking across the field to JV practice on Thursday when I felt someone fall into step beside me. No, there was someone on both sides of me. I dragged my gaze off the ground and looked up. It was Jennie and Sana, one on either side, trapping me.  

“What do you want?” I snapped.  

“To apologize,” Jennie announced. I shot her a disbelieving look. 

“Are you kidding?” 

“Nope.” She and Sana exchanged glances. “See, I’ve been sort of hanging out with Taehyung this week.” I kicked at a tuft of grass and kept walking.  

“I noticed.”  

“He likes me.”  

“Great.”  

“And it’s because of you.” I looked up at that.  

“What?” Jennie shrugged, looking sheepish.  

“He told me about your conversation at Pop’s with him. How you told him I was actually cool, if he’d just look for it. Because of what you said, he noticed me and because of what you told me about acting dumb around him, when he did start paying attention, I dropped the act.” She smiled, her eyes bright with happiness. “So now we’re . . . kind of dating and I owe you for it. I love you and I’m sorry. Really, I’ve been a jerk.” She slung her arm over my shoulder.  

“And the cool thing is, that when I started working hard this week on soccer to bust you, I realized how much I love the game. It’s fun to sweat! So you got me the guy and helped me realize what I wanted. And I’m so sorry for how badly I treated you Y/n.”  

“I’m thrilled for you,” I mumbled. Or I would be, if she weren’t stealing all my dreams. Her smile faltered.  

“What’s wrong? Why aren’t you happy for me? Do you want me to kiss your toes or something?” Toe kissing wasn’t going to cut it.  

“No, it’s fine.” They both frowned at me.  

“Are you still mad?” Jennie asked. “I meant it when I said I was sorry. Since when do you hold a grudge?” I shook my head as we approached the field for our last JV practice before tryouts happened tomorrow.  

“No, it’s other stuff.” 

“Like Jungkook?” Sana asked. I shot her a look.  

“What do you know about Jungkook? Did he say something to you?”

“No but I noticed you guys weren’t practicing this week. What’s up?” Coach Merrill blew her whistle for us to do a warm up lap around the field and we fell in together in the back. Jennie bumped me with her shoulder.  

“So? What’s going on?” I pressed my lips together and shook my head.  

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I actually did want to talk about it, but I was still too mad about their betrayal to tell them. I mean, yeah, she apologized but it wasn’t enough. I was still mad, so I sped up and left them behind and I could hear them whispering behind me. 

I didn’t care.  

After a few seconds they caught up with me again. 

“So, we’re going to stay and practice with you tonight,” Jennie announced. I snorted.  

“It’s Thursday night. Pop’s night. You never stay late on Thursdays, especially now that you have a boyfriend.” 

“We’re staying,” Jennie said firmly. “I’ve been hanging out with Coach Merrill and eavesdropping and I know it’s between you and Kathleen for the second spot. I know what her weakness is and I know what yours is.  I can help you fix it tonight.” 

I was completely unable to stop the hope from flaring in my chest. “Oh, come on.” She grabbed my arm and tugged me to a stop so I was facing her. “I’ll stay here all night if that’s what it takes to help you make varsity. I owe you.” I inspected her, she looked serious.  

“You’re the number one spot?” 

“Yeah, but if you don’t make it, I’ll drop out so you can have my spot.” She put her hand over her heart. “I swear on the watery grave of my dead goldfish Herman that I’ll drop out if I make it and you come in third.” That got my attention. To invoke Herman was way serious.  

“But I thought you just said that you realized you wanted varsity?”  

“I do but I owe you. I’ll walk away if I need to. Herman Swear.” I stared at her, my throat getting tight. I could tell that Jennie was totally serious about how much she wanted varsity, and she was willing to Herman. Swear her spot over to me if it came down to that. I nodded my acceptance of her apology.  

“Thanks.”  

“So, am I forgiven?” I nodded.  

“Only because of the Herman Swear.” Sana gave a small whoop of joy and threw her arms around both of us. “I’m going to miss you guys so much when you both make varsity!” I hugged them both back, and Jennie did too.  

“You guys are the best,” I said. “Even if I did hate you earlier in the week.”  

“Ditto,” Jennie laughed. Coach Merrill blew her whistle.  

“Girls! Aren’t you supposed to be running?” We giggled and started running again, hopelessly behind the rest of the team. And for the first time since Saturday I felt better. But I still couldn’t keep myself from checking out Jungkook’s field after practice to see if he was there.  

He wasn’t. “Our” field was empty. All week I’d thought that he was still there, practicing, hoping I’d show up. 

But he wasn’t.  

I’d cut him off and he’d let me. It was now officially over between us. Even as friends, it was no more and I felt like my heart was going to break. 

We practiced until almost eleven o’clock Thursday night. My mom came and brought us dinner and then hung out while we practiced. By the time I went to bed I was so unbearably tired that I almost didn’t lie awake thinking about the tryouts, or Jungkook or Jennie and Taehyung and everything else.  

And then it was Friday, the morning of the day of the tryouts. 

And then it was Friday afternoon when it was time for tryouts. I walked out onto the field, fl anked by Jennie and Sana, my nerves in knots. 

The JV girls practice was going to be combined with the varsity girls practice, but Sana and her group were going to be separate. Jennie and I were going to be matched with a varsity girl. I scanned the fields as we approached.  

Taehyung and Jimin were sitting in the bleachers and they gave us a thumbs up. But no Jungkook. I searched again, fighting against the disappointment. I’d been so certain he would come. This is what we’d been working for together. How could he not be here to support me? But he wasn’t there. He simply wasn’t there. 

“Who are you looking for?” Jennie asked.  

“No one.”  

“Duh, she’s looking for Jungkook,” Sana said. “What’s up with you guys? You still haven’t told us anything.” I shook my head and steeled myself against the wave of misery.  

“Today is about soccer.” No way was I going to screw up tryouts because I was bumming about Jungkook.“The varsity coach is here.” Coach Young stood next to Coach Merrill, with a clipboard in her hand. Suddenly I felt nauseated. I stopped where I was.  

“I can’t do this.” 

“Yes, you can.” Jennie grabbed my arm and started dragging me toward the bench, but I twisted out of her reach, my hands shaking. 

“No, I can’t. What if I screw up?” I set my hands on my thighs and bent over, trying to catch my breath from my chest, which had suddenly gotten tight. I’d worked so hard for it, and now it was here.  

“I screwed up so badly at the last practice with them. This is my last chance.”  

“So, if you fail, you’ll be on JV with me and we’ll have fun,” Sana said. “What’s so bad about that?” 

“It’s just . . .” I closed my eyes and tried to breathe. They didn’t understand. No one would understand how important this was. I felt a hand on my back, then someone leaned next to me. My heart leaped, and my eyes popped open.  

“Jungkook?”  But it was my mom. She squatted next to me and patted my shoulder.  

“You’ll be great. You’re good enough. You don’t even have to play your best and you’ll make it.” I stared at her, the tension in my body beginning to ease.  

“What if I can’t play?” She smiled.  

“You’ll be fine.” She held out her cell phone. “Someone wants to talk to you.” I grabbed the phone.  

“Jungkook?”  

“Hey, Y/n,” my dad said. “How you doing?”  

“Dad?” I frowned. “Why are you calling me?”  

“Because I couldn’t make it there, but I wanted you to know I was thinking of you. You’ll do great.” I kicked a tuft of grass and took a deep breath. He was right. I could be great.  

“I can do this.” 

“You bet you can. How about dinner Sunday night?” I lifted my head.  

“Really? Dinner with you and me?”  

“Yep. To celebrate making varsity.” I grinned.  

“Okay.” Coach Merrill blew her whistle. “I gotta go. Bye.” I hung up and handed the phone back to my mom, feeling better already. Jennie slung her arm over my shoulder.  

“Okay, Y/n, here’s the thing. Last time you screwed up because you were trying too hard. All you need to do is focus, like you do in practice. Think about the ball and the game, not about varsity or anything like that.” She tapped her head. “Your problem is that you’re too intense out there. I’m better because I relax and go with the flow and let myself succeed instead of forcing it.” I eyed her, rolling her advice over in my mind. It made sense.  

“Thanks.” 

“Let’s go kick some butt, okay?” She gave me a smile that was all attitude. Her expression fired me up.  

“You got it.” We strode up to the group of varsity girls, and when Coach Young assigned me to pair up with the same varsity chick as last time, the one who had dominated me, Jennie leaned over and whispered  

“You’re as good as she is. Believe it, and go with your instincts.” I thought of how much I’d practiced with Jungkook and the late night drilling session with the girls last night and I knew it was true. I did believe it. 

Two and a half hours later, I was sweaty, exhausted and fired up beyond belief. Lisa, my varsity opponent, had dusted me a few times, but I’d beat her too. It was so unbelievably awesome to be up against such good players and once I took Jennie’s advice and stopped worrying about it, I’d just let myself go and I had a fantastic time. 

Coach Young whistled us in and I flopped next to my best friend on the grass. She was drenched in sweat as well and even had a grass stain on her shoulder.  

“How’d it go?” I asked. She beamed at me.  

“Awesome.” Sana sat next to us, still looking almost as fresh as she had when we’d walked out onto the field.  

“Well, practice was totally boring without you two there,” she announced. 

“If you both make varsity I think I’m going to try out for the musical and bag sports. Soccer’s really boring if you actually just play soccer, you know?” Jennie and I grinned at each other and I realized that for the first time in forever, someone besides Jungkook actually got me too. Coach Young blew her whistle.  

“First of all, I want to say thank you to the JV team for practicing with us today. It’s always great to see the up-and-coming talent.” The varsity girls politely clapped for us and Jennie, Sanna and I cheered loudly. 

“So as you all know, we have two open spots on varsity this year. I would like to welcome the following girls to the team: Jennie Kim.”  

My gut tightened as Jennie screamed and jumped to her feet and the crowd burst out in cheers. I was happy for her I really was, but I wanted it so badly as well. 

“And the second player is . . .” She paused to confer with Coach Merrill and I saw her eyes go to me. I sat up, my heart starting to race. It was me, they’d picked me. Coach Young looked up from her notes. “The second player is Kathleen Hoffman.”  

Kathleen shrieked and the place cheered, and I stared numbly at the grass as my insides shriveled up. I hadn’t made it. Sana touched my arm, but I couldn’t look at her. Then Jennie sat back down and leaned toward me. 

“Herman Swear, Y/n. My spot is yours.” But I shook my head and looked at her.  

“I don’t want your spot. You earned it. Getting a spot that way, it would be like cheating.” She frowned.  

“You’re sure?” I nodded, and saw the relief in her eyes and I knew then that she really would have given up her spot but I couldn’t take it. Not that way. 

A varsity girl grabbed Jennie’s arm and congratulated her and I clenched my fists. All I wanted to do was leave. One of the coaches blew the whistle again over the screams of all the girls. It took three more tries before people quieted down enough to hear what Coach Young was saying. I stared at the ground and wished this was over, barely listening to the yammering of the coach who was not going to be my coach.  

“Due to the talent of the JV squad, we decided to add a third roster spot. Y/n, welcome to varsity.” What? I jerked my head up as Sana shrieked next to me. Jennie yelled and tackled me in a huge hug that knocked me onto my back. I grunted as I fell over, disbelief making me numb.  

“We both made it,” Jennie shouted. “You did it!” 

“Oh, my God!” Sana dove on top of us, hugging us both. “I’m going to miss you guys so much! You’re so awesome!” Twisting to the side so I could see past Jennie’s embrace I looked up at Coach Merrill and she gave me the thumbs up. That’s when it sank in. 

I’d made varsity. 

I jumped to my feet, screaming. “I made it! I made it!” My friends screamed back and hugged me, and we all yelled and danced. And then my mom came over and we all hugged her, then we called my dad and I could tell he was happy. Then I realized Jungkook had been so right about him ---- 

Jungkook. 

After I hung up with my dad, I held the phone in my hand. My mom was talking to Coach Young to find out the hours of practice, and when games were. I watched Jennie get a hug from Tahyung and I envied Sana as she and Jimin bent their heads together in deep conversation. 

Jungkook might not have come today and I might not be talking to him, but he was part of the reason I’d made the team, he deserved to know. I was pretty sure he’d be psyched, so I dialed his number from memory hoping he would answer the phone, at the same time I hoped he wouldn’t.  

He didn’t. 

It went to voice mail. I smiled at the sound of his voice. He still made me feel good. “Jungkook, this is Y/n. I just wanted to let you know . . .” 

“Y/n!” Jennie was suddenly next to me. “We’re going to Pop’s to celebrate. You’re coming, right?” I braced against my instinct to refuse, and I nodded.  

“Of course I am. Wouldn’t miss it.” 

“Cool.” She kissed my cheek then ran back to Taehyung, Sana and Jimin.   

“So, anyway, Jungkook,” I continued, “tryouts are over and I made varsity.” I felt a smile break over my face. “Did you hear me? I made it!” I shouted the last bit still too excited to contain myself. “It was partly because of our practices, so thank you so much for all of your help. I really appreciate it. So yeah, just wanted to let you know this! Bye!”  

Shutting the phone and giving it to my mom I ran after my friends into the gym. Who cared if Jungkook had blown me off? I’d proved I could do it on my own and I wasn’t going to let him ruin my celebration. I didn’t need him. I was a varsity soccer player now! 

“Here’s to Jennie and Y/n- varsity soccer players.” Sana raised her root beer. “Yay!”  

We all toasted by tapping our red plastic cups against one another’s. I grinned at my friends, not even caring that I was there with two couples. I’d made varsity! Soccer was what mattered. Not guys! Not dating. And certainly not Jungkook. 

Taehyung had his arm over Jennie’s shoulder and even though Jimin and Sana weren’t near to that stage, they were sitting on the same side of the booth almost touching shoulders, so they were on their way. The cashier announced our number for our pizza. Tae jumped up.  

“My treat tonight. I’ll get it.”  

“I’ll help.” Jimin slid out of the booth and the guys headed up to the counter for our meal. They weren’t dating me but if they wanted to buy my celebratory dinner I wasn’t going to stop them. I grinned at the girls. 

“This is the greatest night. I never thought I had a chance, not after that horrible practice with varsity a couple of weeks ago.” Jennie cocked her head.  

“Last night when we were drilling, I couldn’t believe how much better you’d gotten. That practice time with Jungkook really helped, huh?” I shrugged and suddenly felt deflated.  

“Sure.” She studied me.  

“What happened with him, anyway? All of a sudden it’s like he’s disappeared off the planet. Sana moved her drink out of the way so she could move closer to me.  

“Yeah. What happened?” I fiddled with my napkin, shredding it into little pieces. 

“He’s a dork.” I shrugged. “I decided to blow him off. No biggie.” Sana cocked her head.  

“Why is he a dork?”  

“Because he thinks he can kiss me whenever he wants and have it not mean anything.” Two sets of eyebrows went up and their jaws dropped.  

“He kissed you?” 

“Yeah.” 

“On the lips? ” Jennie asked, her eyes glittering. “Was it nice?” 

“Yeah, on the lips.” I felt my cheeks get hot. “ Gosh it was really nice.” 

“So, what’s the problem?” Jennie sounded shocked. “Why did you blow him off? You like him, he kisses you and it’s great and you 

ditch him? Why?” I realized my napkin was fully shredded, so I pulled the dispenser toward me and tugged another one free and started working on that one.  

“He did it to show me that we were just friends, and—” Jennie shook her head.  

“No, no, you have got to start from the beginning.” I looked into the faces of my friends, realized how much I’d missed having them to talk to, and suddenly the whole story spilled out. The whole thing. When I finished they were both smirking. I scowled at them.  

“What’s so funny? He blew me away with the best kiss in the world and then ruined it by saying it meant nothing. How is that funny?” I saw Taehyung and Jimin finish paying for the pizzas and start to head back to the table. “Never mind. We’ll talk about it later.” Jennie chuckled.  

“It’s funny because you and Jungkook are both such idiots.” 

“Me? How am I an idiot?” The boys arrived with the pizza and I leaned back in my seat and gave Sana and Jennie the “I don’t want to talk about it in front of them” look. Jennie nodded, then looked up at Taehyung as he slid in next to her.  

“So if a guy kissed a girl on the lips, like a really good kiss, would you believe him if he said he did it to prove he didn’t like her?” 

“Jennie!” I kicked her under the table, missed, and slammed my toe into the leg, sending pain shooting up my foot. Taehyung snorted. 

“No way. If he claimed that’s why he kissed her, he’s lying. It’s just an excuse to cover up the real reason he kissed her.” 

“Jennie I swear I will kill you if you don’t shut up.” Taehyung looked at me as he tugged a slice of pizza free. 

“Why? Did Jungkook feed you that line after he kissed you or something?” I balled up the napkin and hurled it at him. He didn’t even flinch when it bounced off his forehead.  

“Shut up,” I growled. He grinned and Jennie gave me a smug look. 

“He kissed you because he wanted to, then had to make up a reason afterward,” She said.  

“No way.” I gave up trying to get them to abandon the conversation. “Afterward, I hinted that I liked the kiss and he totally panicked! If he liked me, he wouldn’t have panicked when he thought I liked him.” 

“Not necessarily,” Jimin said. We all looked at him in surprise. I didn’t realize the guy actually spoke in public. He shrugged.  

“He might have panicked because he liked you.” Sana nodded. 

“Totally! I mean, you both were totally anti dating, right? Then you start to like him and you panic. And he starts to like you but figures it’s okay because you don’t like him, then he realizes you like him and he isn’t prepared for that. So he panics and makes up that stupid line about kissing you to prove he doesn’t like you.” 

“That makes no sense.” I resumed my napkin shredding with even more force. 

“Guys make no sense,” Jennie agreed. She beamed at her boyfriend. “Even you.” He grinned back.  

“Girls make even less sense.” 

“No way. It’s all boys.” I rolled my eyes as the table descended into a totally annoying and cute argument between couples about which gender made less sense. I grabbed a paper plate and pulled two slices of Meat Lover’s Deluxe onto my plate, letting it wash thoughts of Jungkook out of my head. He was history and I was moving on. 

I picked up my pizza and blew on the end to cool it off before I took a bite, almost chuckling when I thought of how I’d spilled pizza onto Jungkook’s shoe. I tested the cheese with my finger to make sure it wasn’t going to burn the roof of my mouth off, then took a bite.A b oot landed with a thunk in front of me, right on the edge of the table. 

“Need this?” I looked up to see Jungkook standing there, his foot up on the table, grinning at me. I was vaguely aware of the rest of the table falling silent. I swallowed my bite.  

“No, I’m good. I learned my lesson.”  

“You sure?” After a second, I took a pepperoni off my slice and set it on his toe.  

“Thanks. I was looking for a place to stash that.” He grinned, took the pepperoni, and popped it in his mouth.  

“So, I got your message. Congratulations on varsity. That’s awesome.” I couldn’t help but smile.  

“Thanks. I was totally psyched.” He nodded.  

“I knew you could do it.”  

“Yeah, well, I had my doubts, but it worked out.” I shrugged, suddenly not quite sure what to say. “So, um, how have you been?”  

His gaze flicked to the rest of the table, all of whom were listening intently, then back to me. “Okay. You?” I refused to think about how cute he looked in his oversize plaid shirt hanging out of his jeans, with the cuffs rolled up, or how much I missed being with him, so I put on a big, fake grin.  

“I just made varsity, so I’m awesome.” 

“Right.” He sort of shifted his weight and shoved his hands in his pockets, moving his gaze to the gang again.  

“So, um, it looks like you’re busy, so I’ll just hit the road.” He hesitated and looked right at me. What? What was that look for?  

“Okay, thanks for stopping by.” He nodded a greeting at the rest of the table, then started to turn away, then turned back.  

“Congratulations again, Y/n. I’m really psyched for you.” Then, before I could answer, he turned around and walked out. The door had just shut behind him when Jennie whacked me on the side of the head with my stack of napkins. 

“Idiot! Why are you still sitting here?” I batted the napkins away. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“Jungkook!” She whacked me again. “He came here tonight looking for you and you totally let him go!” 

“Hey!” I ducked as the napkin assault came back for a third try. “How would he know I was here? I’m sure he just ran into me.” 

“Weren’t you on the phone with him when I came up and told you we were going to Pop’s?” Jennie didn’t wait for my answer. She kicked me under the table. “He’s getting away! Go after him!” 

“So he can reject me again?” I jerked my throbbing shin out of her reach, then sat back and folded my arms. “Forget it.”  

“Reject you? He came here for you,” Sana said. She looked at Taehyung. “Didn’t he?” 

“Looks that way to me,” he answered. “But you didn’t invite him to hang with us and you said you were excellent even though he wasn’t around. If I were him, I’d take off too.” 

“But . . .” 

Sana grabbed the napkins from Jennie and whacked me on the head. “Go after him idiot!”  

“But . . .” Jimin nodded. “I think they’re right. If I liked a girl, and if she gave me your attitude I’d leave too.” Sana smiled at him.  

“I would never have given you the reaction Y/n gave Jungkook.” He grinned back.  

“That’s why I’m sitting here.” I stared at them, the two shyest people on the planet. 

They’d actually, somehow, figured out that they liked each other. Were they right? Should I go? Was there some subliminal boy/girl dating language that had just totally gone over my head? They all turned and looked at me, then shouted in unison, “Go!” 

“I’m going!” My heart suddenly racing, I slipped out of the booth, sprinted across the restaurant, ducking around kids and flew out into the street.  

No Jungkook.  

I looked both ways, looked down the street. 

Still no Jungkook. 

Shit! I’d missed him!  

Then I thought of him, and I knew where he was. Biting my lip in nervous anticipation, I started walking down the street toward the ice cream shop, then I broke into a jog, and by the time I reached it, I was in a dead sprint. I skidded to a stop out front. The place was packed with people, and our bench was taken by a mom and her three kids. 

He had to be here. I knew he had to be. 

I hauled open the door, then jumped back in surprise as Jungkook nearly fell into me, a massive chocolate dipped waffle cone in his hand. 

“Jungkook!” I jumped back as the ice cream flew out of his cone and onto my shirt. The top scoop landed with a thud and I caught it in my palm as it slid down my shirt. I lifted my hand up, chocolate ice cream dripping from between my fingers.  

“How did you know I wanted a bite? You’re so nice.” I took a slurpy mouthful, and was rewarded with a half smile from him. He held out his cone without a word, and I dumped the ice cream back into it, then started licking the ice cream off my hand. He tossed me a napkin.  

“Aren’t you missing out on your celebration?” He started walking down the street. My friends were right, he was miffed that I hadn’t invited him to join us. 

“Yeah, but . . .” Could I really do this? Could I really tell him I liked him?

“But what?” He didn’t look at me but I heard the expectant tone in his voice, so I said it.  

“I just thought it would be appropriate to celebrate with you since you helped me get there.” He slanted a glance at me.  

“Really?”  

“Really.” I took a deep breath, then chickened out. I just couldn’t take that look on his face again, the one where he acted like I had rabies or something. We walked in silence for a few minutes, and I realized we were heading in the direction of my house. He handed me his cone without a word, and I took a bite. “Thanks.” He nodded. And still we said nothing. So . . . what now? He stopped suddenly and turned toward me.

“Did you like it when I kissed you?” I blinked.  

“Um . . .” What was the right answer? What was he looking for? He scowled and spun away.  

“Never mind,” he muttered. “Forget I asked.”   

“No!” I ran after him, grabbed his arm and made him stop. “Yes, I liked it. I liked it a lot, that’s why I couldn’t take hanging out with you, because that’s all I could think about whenever I saw you, but you weren’t thinking about it at all and I felt so awkward and—”  

“Wrong.” I frowned.  

“What?”  

“You’re wrong.” He was looking at me intently, his eyes dark and intense in the shadows from the streetlight. “I was thinking about it. All the time.” Suddenly, I had trouble swallowing.  

“You were?” He nodded.  

“See, the thing is, I liked it too.” I felt like someone had just dropped a brick on my head.  

“You . . . did?”  

“Took me a while to figure it out, though. What I thought, what you thought.” He held out his cone.   

“Here.”  Ice cream? I didn’t want ice cream right now! But I took it when he practically shoved it in my hand. Then I forgot about the ice cream when he put his hands on either side of my face and leaned toward me, his gaze intent on mine. His hands were warm, and he gently rubbed his thumbs against my cheeks, like he was waiting to see if I was going to tell him to back off.  

When I didn’t, he got this little smile on his face, and then he bent down and kissed me and it was even better than before. Softer, slower, and perfect, making little chills rush down my arms. He tasted like chocolate, like warm, melted chocolate. He broke the kiss and pulled back slightly.  

“So, that was a test.” I blinked, trying to remember my name and how to breathe.  

“What?”  

“I had to see if my theory still stood. You know, that a guy and a girl can kiss on the lips and still be just friends.”  

“What?” I stepped back, clutching his ice cream. “We’re back to that again? Are you kidding?” He took my hand before I could get out of reach.  

“And my conclusion is that maybe other people can kiss and have it mean nothing, but we can’t.” I stopped trying to get away.  

“What are you saying?” I had to know for sure. 

“I’m saying . . .” He tugged gently on my hand and I let him pull me closer. “I’m saying that I like you. Like, like you. For real”  

“Are you sure? I mean, you kinda freaked that day on the soccer field.” 

“Well, the thing is I missed you this week. I’d gotten used to hanging out with you and when I couldn’t anymore . . . it bummed me out.” He tugged on my ponytail and this time it didn’t make me think that we were only friends. It made me think that I liked him, and I liked being with him.  

“So?” I grinned at him, my happiness nearly bubbling out of my head.

“So what?”He groaned. “Cut me some slack here, Y/n. I’m not exactly used to telling girls I like them, you know? Are you in or not?” I laughed, unable to keep it inside any longer.  

“Jungkook, you’re a total idiot if you can’t figure out that I like you too.” 

“Really?” He got this huge smile on his face. 

“Swear.” He slipped his hands around my waist and pulled me against him, tossing the ice cream cone over his shoulder. It landed with a splat on the sidewalk. 

“So does that mean I have a varsity girlfriend?” I giggled like a total girl and linked my hands behind his neck.  

“Yeah, I guess it does.” 

“Sweet, because I wouldn’t have it any other way” Then he bent his head, and I stood up on my tiptoes and we met in the middle. 

And it was perfect. 

Thank you for reading this far and for all your love <3 you guys are the best!

[master-detective-archives]

"Wow. That's amazing. What else can you do?" She's impressed alright and now she's curious.

"Huh?! I-if you two are good with that then, i can give you some snuggles."

Desuhiko on the other hand is jealous over there.

----

"Hello, it's nice to see your face." She was trying to keep a cheerful smile to help the guy's mood. "You can take one step at a time so don't worry. Alright?" She wanted to give more comfort but the rule was no phsycal contact so she has to work around it. "Maybe you'd like to... Uh... Take a walk or something later? I don't mind keeping you company until you feel a little better."

"Thank you. It takes a lot of work." It definitely would take a lot of time yes. "A lady has to look good and rock their styles."

Event: Valentine's Speed Dating

*You were minding your own business, when you came across a stylish looking tent with the colors of Valentine's day all over it. There was a sign hanging above the entrance of the tent. It reads: 'Love-tastic Valentine's day Speed Dating! Hosted by Fashion queen Monophanie'. A valentine's speed date, huh? Sounds interesting. Before you could do anything else, someone comes out of the tent and greets you.*

"Hello.......My name is Me Daichi......Will you be.....participating in.....our special.....valentine's day......event......? It will......be loads.....of fun......I promise it will......."

@anemoacedia @perfect-bloodcovered-family @ichi-peachy @sinless-slaughter @smiling-cervidae

@after-neo-world @oddblogfullofoddmuses @recovering-remnant @hopes-memorial @magic-academia

@master-detective-archives @respectless @class-105 @setting-morningstar

@kokichi-and-co @randomlysent @ultimate-investagter-graduate @iroha-painter-missing

[zhivchik]

[asthedeathoflight]

Craziest thing ive ever heard in my life is when i saw a list of fun facts about my hometown and it was like (nearby mountain) is so prominent that locals just call it "the mountain." Hello. Obviously. Do other cities not have a The Mountain? I just sent my mom a picture of where i can see it from my bedroom window and i called it "the mountain." Fucking airlines take out ads in our magazines that call it "the mountain." Yall really full naming your mountains???? Its Right There bro. Its The Mountain. Yall got more than one mountain?????

[dyketennant]

the thing about that tv episodes post is that i’m pretty sure having less episodes doesn’t inherently solve actors/crew working overtime/crunch, that problem still exists, just over a slightly shorter shooting period. the end goal would ultimately be for longer seasons with fair working hours—that way everyone is employed for longer and doesn’t have to go through like. 8 weeks of shooting hell before being unemployed for 6 months. literally what the hell man

[rainbowolfe]

Japan has a high conviction rate because they have a low prosecution rate. They only prosecute people when they're super sure they can win. The relationship people have with the police in Japan vs America is actually super important. American cops were created to catch slaves.

That origin point influences how they function today--with the goal of catching as many people as possible. There shouldn't be quotas on how many people get arrested. That is why cops intentionally instigate and provoke. Why they look for—or even create—reasons to arrest someone who hasn't committed a crime.

So you can rest assured that not one of those serial killers and rapists killed in the first arc of Death Note were wrongfully accused lmao. In the context of Japan, if they're in jail, they likely did it.

Their problem is that there are also a lot of people who did commit violent crimes but face no punishment for it because the evidence isn't seal proof. That's why Light starts killing criminals. To deter people from doing crime at all. ((That's why it's relevant that his dad is lamenting another criminal getting away with it))

Context here is, again, super important. The NYPD is notably corrupt and incompetent. They're worried about looking good and sending a message to other potential vigilantes. So if we translate this over to Death Note... they'd either have the right guy or still be looking for him lol. But lets say they did just snatch up some random guy like they've done now. There's lots of reasons why Kira wouldn't execute Luigi.

-he hasn't been convicted of anything yet.

-Light would know he's not the actual killer via his dad always telling him about these case.

-Light himself is a vigilante, so to kill one without hearing his case would be hypocritical.

-L would casually deduce who the actual killer is and where he went. So Light killing Luigi would prove he was Kira. In trying to find a way around this, he would learn of the actual killer. Sparing Luigi.

-first arc Light wouldn't execute the actual killer if he was caught. He would do so if he had to find the killer himself (which he probably would with L on the case), but couldn't find the sufficient evidence to convict through official means. Second arc Light would execute the killer on principle.

Light would absolutely execute Bryan Thompson if Luigi is left alive long enough for all the information we all know now to come out. All Light's doing is writing names down. He's not killing anyone with his own hand. That's the work of some external force connected to the book..... yet he still takes responsibility for those deaths.

Bryan Thompson didn't kill anyone with his own hands, but he is absolutely responsible for those deaths. He set the rules of the external force. Those people are dead because of what he told his workers to do. How he told his company to operate. Because he knew he would benefit from it.

Light is able to justify his responsibility because they were criminals. Some amount of the people Bryan is responsible for causing the death of were innocent. He would classify Bryan as having "escaped Justice" which, he didn't do it often, but he did pursue and execute those types of people too.

I put my thoughts below. Feel free to share yours!

Light Yagami grew up in an upper-middle-class household and absorbed the dominant values of society. That's why his plan for improving society is to kill criminals.

Light believes the problems with this world can be traced to bad individual people doing bad individual acts, seeks to discourage them from doing bad things by making examples of the criminals he executes (if you do this bad thing, you might also die!), and does not value the lives of criminal scum. Values common in mainstream society, rarefied by Light's sheltered childhood, exacerbated by his father being a senior police officer.

Speaking of which, Light is even more likely to implicitly trust police officers than most upper-middle-class teens. His primary exposure to police is not the business ends of their truncheons, or hearing police victims share their stories, but hearing the cops share their stories. And not just any cop, but the head of the NPA; another layer of insulation from the violence and corruption of the common cop.

So Light is unlikely to sympathize with whoever shot Brian Thompson; he doesn't care how bad the American medical bureaucracy is, that doesn't justify murder! He'd be horrified by how many people cheer on the murderer, or at best refuse to condemn the act. He'd want to make an example of that murderer. And unless Light personally discovered evidence otherwise, he'd accept as a given that the police officers saying Luigi Mangione was the murderer were correct.

But that's just, like, my theory, man.

[leyavo]

Wife/girlfriend series, I wanted to do some more for the other TF 141 guys after doing Ghost’s, Gaz & Soap. John Price is much older than the others and a bit set his ways….

[masterlist] [Wife/Gf masterlist]

Price is on his third wife, you.

The last one bled him dry in the divorce, but that still didn’t put him off marriage.

His family not bothered to get to know you as much as the first and second wife. As if they know you’ll get fed up with him and his ways.

You can tell why he hasn’t had any luck with women. The man is terrible at doing laundry, grumbles to himself instead of talking and smokes like a chimney. Set in his ways, he finds it hard to break away from it.

“Breath of fresh air, darling,” he says to you as you chuck his dirty laundry at him.

“Clean your own crap, I’m not your maid or your mother!” You snapped, taking the cigar from his lips and smushing the end into the ashtray.

John Price just kept pushing and pushing, liking that you set boundaries with him and unintentionally made him get his shit together. He loves it when you tell him what to do.

You never wanted him to change, just wanted him to get a grip on his life.

“I have a career too, I might not be a bloody captain, but what I do matters too.” You work for a social impact company, helping young kids and teens going through poverty in your county. The same kindness John loves as he watches you interact with the people around you.

You were once that kid, struggling to get by and caring for your mother. The one thing you didn’t want, was for everything to fall on you like it did as a kid. You’re firm with it, telling John exactly how it felt. How his actions made you feel.

Well you did break up briefly, only for him to come crawling back. He still has his moments, a little mopey and lazy whenever he’s back from a long mission, but that’s normal.

He likes that you understand his vulnerability, likes the way you whisper that he is safe and protected whenever a nightmare tears him awake. It’s small quiet moments where he loves you most. The brush of your fingers over his knuckles or you palm over his chest as he tries to catch his breath. The way you giggle as his beard and moustache tickle your neck as he kisses you there.

And John gives you a home, security. One thing no one else has. The reassurance that there’s always food stocked up in the fridge and a set schedule for the heating to come on when the temperature drops. That if you can’t do something he’ll help you do it. So nothing has to be on just your shoulders.

Helps you down at the soup kitchen now and again when he’s back home, cleaning all the dishes so that your hands don’t get a rash from the washing up gloves. Little things that make your heart swell.

How he learnt how to knit during the autumn, so he can help you make hats for the homeless. It helps him distress, sometimes even does it in his room back at base to wind down. Currently knitting you some socks too.

Even in charge of the laundry when he comes home, loves the scent of detergent that he grumbles when it’s discontinued and he has to get used to another.

“Bloody found it.” The first thing John says to you as he unpacks his gear. Accidentally letting slip where he was stationed and how he got the discontinued detergent in another country.

And when you ask why he can’t just let it go. “Smells like you, darling.” He’s liked it since the first time you did his washing. Reminds him of home when he puts his civilian clothes back on, always a set put to the side for him to wear home.

When you meet the guys you’re surprised about the dynamic. How John easily gets them to listen and lay down the rules before they enter the house. Shoes come off straight away etc. no smoking indoors but on the patio outside. Watch out for the two chihuahuas running about the house and check underneath the blankets before you sit on the sofa.

One particular chihuahua not moving from Simon’s lap, that he stays in the armchair for ages till the dog wakes up. Johnny and Kyle telling you the most embarrassing stories of the captain, that one time his trousers split in an important briefing and no one told him, but everyone noticed. John doesn’t mind though as he likes the sound of your laugh.

[eggfriedricedwasian]

Tim Drake probably got into fights at school, but he didn't start the fights, he'd finish them. He'd also get away scott free.

People think that they can ruin the Drake's name with their kid getting into fights and causing problems, but no. They encourage him to do these.

Janet had a firm stance in her belief to have the upper hand, so he'd never get in trouble, because she'd blackmail and/or grill into the principal so hard they had to let him go and give the other kid(s) punishment.

Jack had one solid rule, don't start a fight, finish it, and always win. He enforced it by having occasional spars with Tim whenever he could and signed Tim up for all kinds of martial arts to make sure he knew how to fight.

Janet signed him up for whatever else extracurriculars he wanted(ballet, gymnastics, theater, art, vocal coaching, instruments, figure skating, track, etc.).

So just imagine, Tim Drake, publicly known to get into and win so many fights but with no prior context is seen as a trouble maker till they see how well behaved he is. They talk badly about him though, how much of a bad kid little Tim Drake who physically looks like his father but has the face and acts exactly like Janet when he speaks and leads.

And then his parents die and he doesn't cry. They think he's an even horrible kid for not caring about his parents' death even though he's torn.

And then he becomes a Wayne and his reputation, which only Alfred and Bruce know, brings the Wayne name down.

And then he becomes CEO of Wayne Enterprises and everyone expects him to be just like Bruce. What they don't expect is Janet Drake 2.0 when it comes to getting his way and the way he acts or Jack Drake 2.0 with his outstanding leadership and ideas and proposals and what not.

When the rest of the Waynes find out about his reputation, they don't believe it till they see it for themselves.

It's probably at a gala or some sorts. A socialite is being inherently racist towards Damian and talking about how bad of a kid he is. Tim is not standing for it.

"Oh I'm sorry!" he says just a but too loudly to get the attention if everyone in the place, "Would you care to finish that vile comment about my brother? That he was a what now."

"I do, in fact. Perhaps after everyone hears this you Waynes will do better to control that little devil and his unnatural brow-"

The socialite doesn't even get to finish his sentence when Tim karate chops their neck, making them choke(literally) in their own words.

"Oh what was that? Did someone who is actively cheating on their own wife with the underage heir of another company be racist towards my underage and tri-racial brother? Sorry? Did a pedophile defiling the 15 year old daughter of the Miller's family say my 11 year old brother's skin was the sign of the devil? Hm?"

No one says a word, even as they watch Tim twist his words and spill out every secret and dirty fact about the socialite.

They don't even stop him as they watch him beat the crap out of the person with out even trying when said person tries to throw hands with Timothey Jackson Drake, publicly known for getting into fights and winning as well as being graduated from every martial arts class in Gotham ever.

Police were involved, headlines were made, the Miller heir was no longer seen in public and her younger sibling was pronounced heir, and Tim Drake, not Wayne, got off without a scratch, repercussion, or warning.

Damian has never felt an older siblings' loving protection more than he did when he saw Tim grill that socialite. He s never felt more respect for the guy before. And suddenly Dick was lower on the sibling scale.

He was lower on the sibling scale for everyone. Good by #1 sibling Dick Grayson and hello Tim Drake.

Have a problem? Someone's mean or is picking a fight? Don't worry, Tim Drake's there.

Drake is more noticeable than Wayne when it comes to Tim, and everyone finds it out the hard way.

[hoshifighting]

staff!jeonghan

WARNINGS: fluff, smut, fame problems, paris trip, idol!reader is a sweetheart with her staff team, teasing, hair pulling, makeup smudging hair destroying sex, face slap, paris sex.

staff!jeonghan who started way back when your career was just taking off. you were still fresh, the kind of new that had people curious but not quite sold on the idea of you making it long term. jeonghan wasn’t even supposed to be sticking around. dude was just a freelancer, floating between gigs like it was nothing. hairdresser one week, stylist the next, maybe even photographer’s assistant if he felt like it. didn’t care much either—just did his job, got his check, and dipped.

he was there the first time you came in for a shoot, thinking, oh, here we go again, another idol who doesn’t know shit about shit, and probably treats their staff like trash. honestly, he didn’t expect anything from you. he had his walls up like crazy. you’d been doing this for, what, a hot minute? and you were already getting attention, which just made him think, “yep, this one’s probably the snobby kind. won’t even acknowledge us when she’s walking by.”

but then you went and did the most surprising thing—like blew his expectations out of the water kinda surprise. you saw him—no, not just like saw him, but like saw him. took a minute to actually chat. asked how his day was, if he needed anything while he was running around fixing the stage lights or whatever. you even remembered his name by the end of the first day, which? yeah, idols usually don’t bother with that.

fast forward a couple months, and jeonghan’s still hanging around. he didn’t plan to stay, but something about you changed that. it wasn’t even the work, really. it was more like you made things different for the whole staff—hairdressers, makeup artists, stylists, all of them. you had this habit of, like, breaking all the usual rules. you’d bring coffee for everyone in the morning, none of that half-assed, "just for my personal team" bullshit, you made sure everyone was taken care of, because they take care of you as welll.

then there was that time when you randomly called up your manager one day like, "hey, i’m taking everyone out to eat after the shoot." and jeonghan was standing there, trying not to look too surprised, but inside he was like, who the hell does that? especially in this industry where staff usually gets a handshake and a “thanks for your work” at most. while you’re out here throwing cash around to make sure your team is happy. it’s wild.

he remembers the first time you handed out those holiday bonuses. it wasn’t even from the company’s budget either; it was straight up from your own wallet. like, your money. you didn’t even make a big deal about it, just casually handed out envelopes and said, “merry christmas, you guys.” you should’ve seen their faces—everyone was shook, even him, and he doesn’t get surprised that easily. it was one of those moments where the room just, like, collectively inhaled. there was silence, and then someone—probably one of the stylists—goes, “y/n, this is... you didn’t have to...”

and you? you just shrugged, all casual, like it was no big deal. “nah, i wanted to. thank you for taking care of me, you make part of all of this too.” you pointed to the stage.

jeonghan couldn’t even look at you right for a second because it was, like, damn, okay, she’s for real. that was the moment he decided he wasn’t just gonna treat this gig like all the others. working with you? yeah, it felt different. and not in some sappy, fairytale shit kind of way, but in a “maybe there are still people in this industry who aren’t complete assholes” kind of way.

“so you’re sticking around, hannie?” you asked him one day, catching him off guard while he was fixing up your jacket right before a stage performance.

he smirked, his usual cocky, nonchalant self, but there was something softer underneath it. “guess i don’t have a choice. you make it too easy.”

he was your go-to guy now, the one you trusted with everything, from making sure your hair wasn’t fucked up during press tours to giving you a reality check when you were stressing over the dumbest things. and he liked that. he liked being the one you leaned on when you didn’t wanna bother anyone else.

but it was more than that too. you were just different. the way you treated people, the way you made sure everyone around you felt seen, felt valued? it wasn’t fake. it wasn’t for show. it was you. and jeonghan? well, he wasn’t the kind of guy to stick around just for anyone. but for you? yeah, maybe he’d go the long haul.

jeonghan was always there, like a constant shadow that somehow made everything feel lighter instead of heavier. as your career blew up, he didn’t just keep pace—he matched your energy, your needs, every twist and turn that came with your fame. whether it was press tours, backstage chaos, or those ridiculous interviews where some clueless host would try to push your boundaries, he was always ready.

you’d be in the middle of a tv show, mind racing, and then there’d be a subtle shift. jeonghan standing just offstage, watching with a sharp, gaze of his. and it wasn’t like he had to do much—sometimes just a look was enough to let you know he had your back. like that time they tried to switch up your routine last minute, making changes that didn’t sit right with you. you didn’t even need to speak up, though. before you could say a word, he was already stepping in, throwing that effortless, yet somehow intimidating smile toward the team. “nah, we’re sticking with the original plan. my artist doesn’t do changes without notice.”

“your artist,” you’d hear him say that a lot, like a protective label stamped right over you, like you belonged to him—not in a possessive way, but in a way that made you feel safe. secure.

it wasn’t just about the work either, not even close. jeonghan made the loneliness that came with fame feel less suffocating. that part of fame nobody talks about—the part where you can’t make real friends anymore, where every new person in your life feels temporary, transactional. except him. he was loyal.

when you had those long, grueling days full of photoshoots and interviews and events, and all you wanted was to escape, jeonghan was the one who made sure you still had a piece of normal.

like that one time in paris. you were there for a fashion show, sitting front row with all these industry giants who couldn’t care less about anything but themselves, and jeonghan was right beside you, but afterward, when it was just the two of you, he was the one who dragged you to some random hole-in-the-wall restaurant down the street, far from all the cameras and flashing lights, ordering too much food and laughing at how terrible your french was.

“you know, you’re lucky you’ve got me,” he teased, watching you struggle with the menu. “otherwise, you’d be stuck ordering water and bread for the rest of the trip.”

you elbowed him playfully. “i’m just trying to be cultured, okay?”

“sure, sure,” he snickered, but the grin on his face was soft, like he was glad to be there with you. “leave the culture to me.”

he was there on the quieter days too. you’d be at home, no schedule to follow for once, just free. but that freedom? it felt empty when you didn’t have anyone to share it with. jeonghan got that. he’d show up at your place without even needing an invitation, like he just knew when you needed him there. sometimes he wouldn’t even knock. you’d just hear the door click open and his familiar voice, “you better not be working in there.”

you’d laugh, shouting back from wherever you were in the apartment, “i’m not, calm down.”

next thing you knew, he’d be on the floor of your pristine living room, surrounded by lego pieces because, for some reason, that’s what the two of you did on your days off. it was ridiculous, really, two adults crouched over colorful plastic blocks, but it made you feel like a kid again, like before everything got so complicated.

you’d crouch down next to him, watching his hands move, and without thinking, you’d wrap your arms around him from behind, pressing your cheek against his shoulder. it wasn’t even romaaaantic, more like instinct. jeonghan had this way of making you feel safe, like you didn’t have to be the perfect version of yourself all the time. you could just be you. and hugging him like that, clinging onto him like a koala, it was the only way you knew how to show him just how much he meant to you.

“you’re clingy today,” he murmured, but there was no complaint in his voice, just that familiar teasing.

“you’re soft,” you shot back, squeezing him tighter, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. his cologne was subtle but always the same, something that reminded you of quiet, peaceful moments, like this.

he tilted his head a little, catching your eyes “oh, yeah? not what you said last time.”

you puffed your cheeks out, crossing your arms dramatically, the sulk settling in. “i’m done being clingy with you, jeonghan.”

he grinned like he was waiting for that exact reaction. it’s almost like he lived for these moments—when you’d pout and try to act all tough, but really? he knew exactly where this was headed. you weren’t fooling anyone, especially not him.

“oh yeah?” he tilted his head, gaze dripping with amusement as he leaned in, close enough that his breath brushed your ear. “you sure about that?”

you tried to hold firm, but the way his voice dropped a little lower, teasing. you shifted your weight, crossing your legs under you on the living room floor, avoiding eye contact. “mmhmm. you’ll see.”

jeonghan let out a soft chuckle, leaning back and watching you with a glint in his eyes, like he was just waiting for you to crack. “you’re too cute when you sulk, y’know that?”

your heart fluttered, but you bit down on the inside of your cheek, determined to keep up the act. “whatever.”

he moved closer, a hand sliding around your waist, tugging you just enough so that your body leaned into his. “nah, don’t pout, baby,” he murmured, lips brushing lightly against your jaw. “we both know how this ends.”

and he was right. because, every time you tried to act like you were done with him, like you were going to keep your distance, it only ended one way—with you wet underneath him, a needy mess, begging for more.

like that first time in paris. paris had done something to the both of you. it was supposed to be a normal night, just you and him hanging out after the fashion show. nothing special, just another city on the endless list of places you’d been together. but somehow, that night went different. the second the hotel room door clicked shut behind you, you’d scarcely made it through the door before his hands were on you, grabbing, pulling, claiming.

“thought you were gonna keep your distance,” jeonghan had teased as he pressed you up against the wall, his lips trailing down your neck, making your knees weak.

you were already panting, feeling the warmness of him beaming off his body. “shut up, hannie.”

he chuckled against your skin, his tongue flicking out to taste you, making you gasp. “aww, so cute when you’re needy.”

and fuck, were you needy. by the time he’d pushed you onto the bed, tugging at your clothes, you were already whimpering for him, already soaked.

he’d dragged you to the edge, rough hands all over your body, pulling, squeezing, leaving marks everywhere. your hair had been perfect for the show, all sleek and done up, but that shit didn’t last long. the second he had his fist tangled in it, pulling your head back, it was ruined. thrusting into you from behind, his cock splitting you in half with each brutal thrust. “such a fucking mess.”

you’d tried to keep quiet, biting down on the pillow as your body rocked with every movement, but every time you let out a whiny moan, jeonghan was right there to mock you for it.

“aww, hannie’s being too harsh?” he cooed, as he tries to sound sweet. “hm? poor baby can’t take it?”

you’d only moaned louder, your body trembling as he slapped your ass, the sting making you cry out. he’d leaned down then, his breath hot against your ear as he whispered, “use your words, sweetheart. tell hannie how bad you want it.”

you couldn’t even speak, just a mess of broken moans and gasps as he kept slamming into you, the sound of skin against skin echoing through the room. and just when you thought you couldn’t take it anymore, when you were right on the edge, that’s when he did it. his hand came up to your face, smudging the glitter from the show as he slapped you—not enough to really hurt. he is a careful guy.

“fuck, y/n, look at you. such a pretty little mess,” he groaned, his grip on your hair tightening as he pounded into you from behind, relentless. “you gonna come for me? c’mon, baby, let me hear it.”

you whimpered, nodding, your mind spinning as his cock hit that perfect spot over and over, making you roll your eyes, drool, everything u had right of. but just as you were about to cum, he pulled out, leaving you empty and desperate.

“aww, no no no, not yet,” jeonghan cooed, a wicked grin on his face as he turned you onto your back, pushing your legs open wide. “hannie’s not done with you.”

your heart pounded, your entire body aching for release, but you didn’t dare move. he was in control, and you knew better than to push him.

“what’s the matter, baby?” he leaned down, his lips brushing over yours as he teased you. “too much?”

you shook your head, barely able to get the words out. “n-no… please…”

his smirk widened, that wicked glint in his eyes making you shiver. “please what? gotta tell me what you want, sweetheart.”

you whimpered, your hands gripping the sheets as you looked up at him, desperate. “please… fuck me…”

“good girl.”

[yansouleater]

Please go check out @ozzgin I got this idea because of them

I can imagine yandere school losing their fucking minds when they find out reader took a modeling job at the beginning of the year because they needed more money

The reason why they all lost their fucking minds, it’s because it was for the playboy magazine, and it wasn’t just one picture nonono it was enough for reader to have a whole catalog based on them (it was a sad day when you left the magazine company)

I can imagine the first person to find out was the president of the photography club, he was just trying to do research on the best angles to take photos of darlings when he came literally across a photo of you in the most sexy lingerie

Yabdere photographer that is all smug the next day, he’s coming into the photograph room like “yesterday I saw something that you guys would kill for” obviously that clue knew it was Soto do with reader so after hours of intense questioning and made some punches from the star athlete yandere photographer will reveal his findings

Then all hell breaks loose, students trading magazines of reader like Pokémon cards, teachers confiscating the magazine and trading them in the teachers lounge

While all of this is happening reader has no clue about it, it’s an unsaid rule to make sure reader stays in the dark about this, what reader doesn’t know can’t hurt them

[sunfairiess]

𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 || 𝐣𝐣 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤

pairing: jj maybank x fem!routledge!reader

tropes: 3rd person narration | sarah cameron’s pov | childhood best friends to lovers | brother’s best friend | best friend’s sister | fluff | soft boy jj

synopsis: sarah cameron meets her boyfriend’s sister for the first time, and understands what being soulmates means.

warnings: cursing, slightly mention of violence

wc: 2.9k

it’s my first time writing a character x reader (and actually writing a ff in years lmao) so i really hope this turned out well! also, i apologize for any typos or grammar errors but english is not my first language <3

song rec: about you - the 1975 ♡

“c’mon guys, time to go back. it’s starting to freeze out here.” pope said, placing his fishing rod by his side before getting up and walking towards the helm of the boat, kiara following him to keep him some company. he was right: the temperature had started to drop, and honestly he didn’t even know why the pogues decided to go fishing at the end of november.

they were all there, except for the pogue princess as they liked to call her. she was john b’s younger sister, just by one year; and even though she was definitely a pogue down to her core, she actually almost looked like a kook: she was always composed, never drank too much, never even touched a cigarette or a joint, and she worked her ass off every afternoon at the country club to help john b with the bills and to afford a few of the things she liked.

she was smart, kind, the type of girl to lighten up a room with the sound of her laughter. she was also one of the reasons why the ‘no pogue-on-pogue macking‘ rule was made: everyone kind of had a thing for her, and jj maybank was the first in line.

“i seriously regret coming, i think i’m going into hypothermia.” jj said, shuddering a little bit. yes, it was cold, but it wasn’t that cold. jj just liked to be dramatic.

“gosh, you’re such a pussy.” john b laughed, smacking his best friend behind the head. they’ve know each other for more than ten years now. they weren’t friends anymore, they were brothers. they loved and cared for each other very deeply, even if they were acting like jerks most of the time.

as pope started the engine of the hms pogue, ready to go back to the château, john b took his sweatshirt off to pass it to sarah, his new girlfriend. she was a kook, but she was different. she didn’t care about how dissimilar their lives were, she loved spending time with the pogues because they were real. they were amazing friends, they were funny and smart, and the kind of people you could have a serious conversation with. they weren’t superficial like the kooks, and she loved them for this.

she felt a little tap on her leg, catching with her vision her boyfriend’s sweater. she gave john b a smile and slid the blue piece of clothing on. “so, i’m meeting your sister for the first time today, uh. big step.” sarah joked, slightly pushing his arm.

since the first moment they started dating, john b had always talked about how he wanted her to meet his sister. she was the most important person in his life, especially after his dad went missing at sea during a storm. he actually wanted sarah to meet her right away, but she asked him to wait a couple of months, just to see if they were solid about this relationship. “yup, and trust me you’re gonna love her. she’s like a little ball of sunshine, she wouldn’t even hurt a fly.” he said, smiling at the thought how of sweet his sister was with everyone.

“he’s right. i don’t think i’ve even ever seen her mad.” jj stated, shifting his seat from john b’s right to sarah’s left.

“she seems really nice, but i’m not worried about me liking her, because, by what you guys always say about her, i already do. i’m just worried she won’t like me, you know because of the whole pogue-kook thing.”

everyone bursted out laughing at sarah’s words, her face more confused than ever. “what? what did I say?” kiara left pope at the helm of the boat, and went to sit in front of her, crossing her legs together. “you don’t need to worry about that, she doesn’t give a shit about the rivalry. trust me, she looks like she walked out of a cruise brochure. the only thing she wants is to see her brother with someone who makes him happy, which you do, so she’s totally gonna be fine with it.” sarah smiled at her words, feeling a bit more relieved now.

even though pope wasn’t seating next to them, he could still perfectly hear their conversation and see sarah’s tensed body. that’s why he decided to lighten up a bit the discussion. “you know, one time she made jj dress up as a reindeer.” he said getting out a chuckle at the memory of jj dressed as one of santa claus’s reindeers.

kiara followed him with a loud laughter “oh my god it’s true, i almost forgot it.”

sarah gave them an amazed look. she was enjoying this too much to not say anything. “okay, this is actually the funniest thing i’ve ever heard. did you had a red nose like little rudolph, too?” she said with a smirk, turning her head towards jj’s.

“oh shut up, all of you. i only did it because she asked. besides, she looked so happy when i changed into that costume. i would honestly do it again.” jj let out an involontary smile at the thought of y/n. it was like this all the time: wether he wanted it or not, the only thought of y/n made him feel like he was the happiest man on earth, even if he wasn’t. she just had that effect on him.

“god, it’s sickening how whipped you are for my sister.” john b said, mimicking a gag reflex.

jj rolled his eyes at his words. sarah switching her gaze between the two boys sitting one to her left, and the other to her right. she then stopped to look at jj. “wait- you like y/n?”

“like? hell, he loves that girl. he’s been in love with her since he was six. the random hook ups he has? that’s all for show. he only does it to not draw suspicion, since the only girl he’d like to fuck— and sorry john b— is y/n.” pope said, fully exposing his friend’s feelings.

not that jj cared anyway. everyone knew how he felt about her, he didn’t even try to deny it anymore.

“and you’re completely fine with it?“ sarah asked john b, knowing how protective he was when it came to his sister.

“i wasn’t always. first time he told me he loved her? i punched him. not my finest moment but i was kinda mad.” john b replied, slightly chuckling, reminiscing his right fist hitting jj’s jawbone. “i mean, the day before he tells me he sees her as a little sister and then that he wants to sleep with her? hell nah, i wasn’t having that.”

“and what changed your mind?”

“because it’s jj. i know my best friend, and i know how much he cares for her. i knew he was never going to hurt her, i’m actually pretty sure he would die for her.”

sarah nodded along. the look on jj’s face confirming that what john b had just said was a hundred percent true. in that moment a thought crossed her mind, making her think about how what jj and y/n must’ve been something truly special.

“bubba, we’re home.” john b shouted, as he opened the château’s door. the house was silent, except for a light melody coming from the bathroom and the sound of the shower running. “shower! be right there!” sarah heard y/n shout back, as every one of the pogues sat on the couch: her ending up between her boyfriend and kiara, next to who was seated pope; and a bit far away from them jj. she figured he left the space empty for y/n.

about ten minutes later, while the pogues were having a conversation about an upcoming party at the boneyard, a sixteen year old girl came out of the bathroom, wearing a pink sweater and long white sweatpants. white socks at her feet and long wet hair cascading down her back. she walked up to them, bending slightly to place a kiss on her brother’s cheek, and proceeding to do the same with all the others.

she then retraced her steps and stopped in front of sarah. “so you’re the reason why my brother stopped being a cranky old lady.” she smiled, offering her her right hand. “i’m y/n, it’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“sarah. it’s a pleasure to meet you too, john b’s always talking about you.” sarah replied, shaking her hand. y/n let out a small laugh, as she walked towards the end of the couch were jj was seated.

she plopped down next to him, tucking her legs under her bottom and leaning into him. he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer and gently leaving a kiss to the side of her head. “he’s always talking about you too. i swear the other night he woke me up around 3am just to tell me how amazing your date was. which, don’t get me wrong, i was very happy to hear about.”

“you literally throw a pillow in my face.” john b said.

“duh, because you woke me at 3 fucking a.m. i love you bird, but for gods sakes let a girl sleep.” she replied, making everyone laugh at her comment.

the conversation resumed pretty quickly, this time through with jj paying way less attention to it, more focused on the girl next to him.

the entire evening, between laughters and bottles of beers, sarah observed how jj and y/n were always caught up in their whole world. jj’s hands being constantly on her body, wether it was a arm around her shoulders or his hand on her leg. they were glued to each other, sometimes even whispering between them words only they could catch.

for the second time that day, sarah thought about how jj and y/n’s bond was special, going beyond simple friendship.

it was almost two a.m. when kie and pope left, both returning to their respective houses to avoid their parents storming out on them. sarah instead was going to spend the night there, so since jj and john b were on the front porch smoking a joint, obviously a jj’s idea, she and y/n were the only two people moving around the living room, cleaning up the mess of empty beer bottles and pizza boxes.

the whole night she noticed how jj and y/n acted around each other, so since they were now alone, she just felt like she had to ask. “so what’s the deal between you and jj?”

“there’s no deal, we’re friends.” y/n said calmly.

“bullshit, i noticed the way you look at him and how he looks at you. that’s the look of love, sweetie.” sarah decided not to mention how jj actually felt about her. it wasn’t her place to say tell the truth.

“nah, jj would never go for someone like me. he only sees me as a little sister, besides i’m not even his type.” she replied, giving her a kind smile, even though she felt like a lump was stuck right down her throat. y/n always knew she wasn’t the kind of girl jj would want, the were total polar opposites, and truthfully she never even considered herself that much beautiful to have a chance with him.

“since when jj has a type? doesn’t he hits on every breathing human being?” sarah knew this probably wasn’t the right thing to say, but sometimes people needed a little push to blurt out their feelings. to her surprise though, y/n laughed, most likely because she knew how their friend had a habit of flirting with almost every girl he met. it didn’t matter if they were pogues or tourons, or hell even kooks sometimes. a pretty girl is a pretty girl, doesn’t matter where she comes from.

“kinda, but he always hooks up with victoria-secrets-models type of girls, if you get what i mean. and apart from that, we want different things. he doesn’t do relationships and i don’t do random hook ups. not to mention how the possibility of me and jj being together would probably give an aneurysm to my brother.”

“eh, i wouldn’t be so sure about that, ya know. either way though, you like him, don’t you?“ sarah said, remembering the conversation she and the other guys had on the boat.

busted. y/n stayed silent, sailing her lips in a thin, straight line. she then closed her eyes and took a deep breath, getting ready to spill everything out. she figured it was time to tell the truth anyway, since sarah clearly figured everything out.

“i met jj when i was four, we were in kindergarten and some older boys were picking on me. i was smaller and basically on the edge of tears, until i saw this blonde boy running towards me and putting himself between us. even if he was younger than them he still took my defense. after that he walked me home and told me he was a friend of john b’s. since that day, i don’t think i’ve ever liked someone that wasn’t him.“

she took a small pause, just to catch her breath. but she was so caught up in narrating the whole story, that she didn’t notice john b and jj leaning against the doorframe.

jj’s eyes almost bursting out of his face at her words, not expecting to hear her confession. john b, very aware of how his best friend was going to lose his shit any minute now, he places his finger against his mouth, mimicking him to shut up.

“as we grew older the roles kinda reversed and i started to look out for him: when he would come here bruised because of his father i would hug him and clean him up; even if younger than him i helped him study, you know just avoiding he would fail some subjects. at night, dad used to let him sleep next to me or john b because he didn’t want to be alone, thing that of course dad prohibited when i turned twelve. that didn’t stop him though: he would sneak out as soon as john b would fall asleep and come under the covers with me.”

she let out a laugh. “would sir. freud love this? probably yes, but it doesn’t matter. he deserves someone that cares for him, everyone does. and it’s not pity or mercy, i genuinely want to be there for him, because he deserves the best. yet, because of his father he’s convinced he’s worthless, but he’s not. gosh, he’s so funny and smart, which i know sounds weird but he is. he would die for his friends and cares so much for us. and i’m sure he could make it out of obx if only he wanted to. and he’s always so supportive and gen-“

she could’ve kept going on, but she suddenly noticed the two boys staring right up at her. jj’s eyes were watery, like he was going to cry any second now. he didn’t cry much, only when really fucked up things happened in his life, but for the first time he felt like crying not because he was sad and tired but because he was happy. because finally he could’ve had something great going on in his life. he could’ve had her.

without saying anything he launched himself into y/n’s arms, letting her stumble back due to the rushed impact between their bodies. he hold her tight, his arms around her waist and hers around his neck. his face placed in the space between her shoulder and her neck, breathing in the smell of the coconut soap she always used. he didn’t care about sarah and john b still being in the room, he wouldn’t even care if a freaking zebra walked in the house. she was the only thing that mattered. she was his whole universe.

“you shouldn’t eavesdrop, maybank.” she said with a smirk, putting a bit of distance between their bodies so she could look at him in the face, but still managing to play with the of hair at the nape of his neck.

“did you actually mean it? like for real?”

“every word, jay. you know me, i would never lie to you.”

jj maybank was impulsive. half of the time he never thought before acting, which pretty much resulted in him dealing with the aftermath of his stupid decisions. that’s why he didn’t think twice in grabbing y/n’s face with his hands, pressing his lips against hers.

at first he felt her stiffening, probably surprised by his gesture, and for a moment he really thought he had just screwed everything up. but then her hands went to his shirt, yanking him even closer if possible, and he sensed her relaxing, her lips moving against his.

after what seemed like hours, he pulled back, only because they both needed air. if it was up to him, he would’ve spent hours kissing her without getting a break.

“i’ve been loving you for a long time, princess.” she smiled, her cheeks almost hurting because of all the happiness she was feeling.

“well, you’re very lucky then, because i’ve been loving you for a long time too.”

“i can’t watch this, i think i’m gonna throw up.”

sarah nudged her elbow into her boyfriend stomach, giving him a look that said ‘shut the fuck up or i’m killing you’. john b raised his hands in the air, admitting defeat.

and, as they watched jj starting to kiss y/n again, sarah thought of how her own relationship was truly amazing. but in her opinion? what y/n and jj had was the true definition of soulmates.

[lovelettersfromluna]

Not Strong Enough

Summary: Rule number 1 of being best friends with a vampire. Never let them drink your blood.

an: I HEAR YOU ALL YELLING AT ME IM SORRY!! This took entirely too long to get to you guys, but it’s here now! Better late than never right?? Is this heavily inspired by twilight? Yes. Did I use a BoyGenius song as the title? It’s lesbian smut, obviously. Is Ellie going to be a brooding depressed vampire? Oh hell yeah. I hope you all like this! I��m a slut for anything supernatural so this was obvi very fun for me to write. As always, love you all so so much! Thanks for reading 🤍

Warnings: SMUT!!, MDNI!!, scissoring (if ur mad I’m doing another scissoring fic….idk what to tell you it’s hot), messy kissing, Ellie bites reader (outside of blood sucking), mentions of marking, mentions of bruises, mentions of blood, Ellie is kind of insufferable for a small bit but I promise it gets better, please lmk if I missed anything!

Read part 1 here!!

Ellie knew it was a bad idea from the very beginning.

She knew that she was too weak for you, even outside of sucking your blood. You were too fucking good for her, too much of a dream for Ellie to go and fuck up like she did.

Truth be told, Ellie expected all of it. She expected to get utterly addicted to you, she expected the blurred lines of your relationship to become even more blurred when she began sucking you dry of your life source, she even expected herself to lose control when she was in the act, humping and grinding your soft body like a wild fucking animal as if she had no control over herself.

She expected all of it, every single aspect that came with the territory, she knew was coming.

But the hardest part of it all? Was leaving you completely.

Because she knew the moment she felt herself lose control while she was on top of you that night in your apartment, she knew she needed to leave you. She needed to abandon you and your friendship for the greater good, for your sake.

Ellie knew that she wasn’t good for you, and you weren’t good for her. But that didn’t make the pain of not seeing you any less.

She thought she’d be able to do it at first, but the texts from you only reminded her of how much she loved your company, how obsessed she was with simply being around you.

She wound frown every time her phone went off, a low groan leaving her lips when she lifted it up to look at her screen, only to see it was from you.

Ellieeeeee

Where are you?

Haven’t seen u in the longest :((

Ellie can practically hear your pout in the way you text her. She knows you too well, and she knows that you aren’t handling her sudden disappearance well.

At this point, it’s been about two months since Ellie has seen you last? Maybe three? She stopped keeping count because it was driving her insane. It wasn’t even the blood supply that she missed, Ellie would go hungry ten times over, dying from starvation if it meant she could be around you without feeling she was robbing you of your life, ruining things that you were meant to experience because she was too fucking selfish.

Ellie misses you, and it pains her that she hasn’t been able to have you in so long.

Well…not entirely at least. She knew she’d lose her mind entirely if she couldn’t at least be around you for a few moments, so her usual nighttime visits become a bit more frequent when she decides she can’t be around you anymore. She’s a lot more careful when she does it though, knowing how sensitive you were to her presence. It was almost unbelievable how easily you’d woken up to her in your room in the past. She doesn’t know how she’d explain things if you woke up now, not having seen her in so long. So she’s extra aware of how much noise she makes.

Seeing you sleep is almost enough to keep Ellie’s demons at bay, the ones that screamed for you, yearned for you to be by her side, to have your warm skin pressed against her much colder one.

As per usual, she’s scaling up the brick wall of your apartment building, making her way up to your bedroom like thief in the night. You continue to leave your window open every night, and it breaks Ellie’s heart because she knows you’re doing it for her, most likely hoping she slips into your window as she usually does.

It means Ellie needs to be even more careful than she anticipated.

She doesn’t even dare to sit on your bed, standing in the corner of your room as she watches your chest rise and fall. She doesn’t even breathe, scared that the sound of it will wake you.

And she desperately wants to reach out and let her fingers run along your soft skin, desperate for the feeling that you always brought her when you’re near. It makes her fists balk at her sides as she practically itches to feel you, fighting back any and every thought that she had to touch you, if even for a moment.

But she doesn’t. Instead, he stays with you just before the sun rises. She knows it’s risky, and she knows she shouldn’t do it in the event that you wake up and see her. Even if she’s fast enough to dart out of your room before you can even call her name or turn the lights on, you’re too smart for that. You’d know what was happening before she can even begin to gaslight you into thinking it was simply a dream.

She can’t help herself, not when it comes to you. Seeing you sleep satisfies the burning feeling in her chest, the one that yearns so desperately for you, it’s enough to make her knees weak. It’s almost like you’re capable of evoking the same feelings she had when she was a human, when she was weak and stupid and felt nervous around women. Until you showed up, Ellie hadn’t experienced those feelings in a long time, she’d almost forgotten about them.

You always remind her though.

Like when she’s about to leave you, knowing she’s cutting it too close to the time you’re going to wake up and start your day. Her footsteps are practically silence, even against the old, creaky floorboards of your apartment.

She’s almost out of your window, one leg outside as she plants her foot against the fire escape when she hears it. You began mumbling in your sleep, tossing a bit, clearly bothered by whatever dream you were having. While this should’ve been the clearest sign for Ellie to leave as quickly as possible before your eyes opened a bit to see her, she doesn’t. Instead, she stays sat on your window sill, simply watching as you turn to face her, eyes still closed as you pout in your sleep.

If Ellie had a heart that was still beating, she’s sure it would’ve stopped. Because suddenly your mumbling is just clear enough for her to hear.

“Ellie….” You sigh out softly, barely loud enough for the undead girl to hear, but she does. Regardless of the city waking up below her, or the sound of your ceiling fan creaking about, she hears it. It makes her frown deeply, swallowing back the intense whimper that threatens to escape and echo throughout your room.

She isn’t sure if she’s ever left your room so quickly, the girls eyes going wide as she made the familiar path down the side of your building to your side walk.

Even when she got home that night, the vampire practically breaking the front door down of her apartment to get in, she couldn’t get the sound of your voice uttering her name so sweetly, calling out for her even in the depths of sleep that you were in, tugged so deeply by your dreams, you were still calling out for her.

Ellie knew that night, that she had to stay away from her. For both your sake, and her own.

And she’s right, because you were suffering just as much as Ellie was.

Ellie’s presence was always scarce, and while it bothered you a bit before you learned what she was, it made sense. She was a creature of the night, something that seemingly only existed in storybooks, coming to life and living the strange lifestyle that she did.

But you knew immediately that this was different.

The morning after you saw Ellie last left a bitter taste in your mouth. As you woke up that morning, your neck sore with the bruises of Ellie’s lips on your skin, body far too drained and tired even after a night of a sleep that was just a bit too deep. It was similar to almost all the times Ellie had drank from you the night prior.

So, why did you feel so bad that morning?

You knew that you didn’t owe Ellie anything, that you were the one to suggest this in the first place, so there truly wasn’t any room for you to be upset for reasons unknown. What were you even supposed to say to her? That you had a weird feeling? One that you desperately wanted her to relieve by telling you it was all okay?

As much as you wanted to, you knew things between you and Ellie weren’t like that.

You were her friend. You were just her friend, and as much as you wanted more, you knew deep down that if Ellie truly wanted you that way, she would’ve made you she’s a long time ago.

And maybe that’s what bothers you the most when this little dry spell occurs, because the sudden lack of her presence leaves you entirely too much time to dwell on things, wondering what it was that you did wrong, what you could have possibly said to create this sudden rift between the two of you.

Ellie had always been flirtatious, flashing that pretty smile in your direction that made you weak in the knees, calling you sweet names that made your heart beat faster. She was practically dangling it all right in front of your face, the frequent touches, the late night visits at the foot of your bed, all this time when you have her the benefit of the doubt, chalking it all up to her simply wanting to see you and nothing more than that, suddenly made no sense to you.

With time came confusion, and with confusion came anger, desperate to understand why she left you, what you had done to possibly make her so scarce so suddenly. And once the third month had hit without seeing Ellie, you were furious, feeling as though you had one choice and one choice only.

To find Ellie, and get the answers from her yourself.

You don’t go to Ellie’s apartment, not usually at least.

Ellie always told you she liked hanging out at your place, going on and on about how warm and cozy it was being there. She’d never admit it to you because she didn’t want you to think she was a freak, but being in a place that smelled so heavily like you made her brain go absolutely insane.

You’ve been there maybe a handful of times, sometimes heading to her place after a night out, or even stopping by whenever you were in the neighborhood. Bottom line was, your apartment was the designated hang out spot for you and Ellie.

Regardless though, you remember how to get there like it’s written on the back of your hand. You thought about Ellie’s apartment a lot, loving how much the space reflected her. You always wished you had the chance to stay there more often.

You can’t think about that though, not now. Not when you’re storming down the expensive halls of her complex down to her door, and landing a heavy fist on the door. All you can truly care about now, is seeing Ellie and demanding an explanation for her sudden disappearance.

And it’s all so unlike you, so out of your character. If it was anyone else, you’d let it go, giving yourself a few days to sulk before forgetting about it all together and simply moving on. Maybe it’s because it’s Ellie, and maybe it’s because you feel a tad bit used after being her personal buffet for the last few times you’d been around her, just for her to up and leave.

It’s most definitely that. You just don’t want to admit it in fears of sounding selfish.

You land another firm knock on her door when she doesn’t answer in time, feeling yourself grow angrier as the moments pass.

Soon, she’s finally opening the door. The image of her nearly takes your breath away.

Because Ellie always looks beautiful, perhaps it’s the fact that you haven’t seen her in some time, but she looks fucking ethereal standing before you. So tall, so confident, her eyes so fucking dark, piercing through your very soul as she stares down at you. Her lips look like rubies compared to her cold, pale skin, so plump and kissable.

All you can think about is the way they felt pressed against your throat, and it makes you lift your hand to press against the two small circular scars on your neck.

Ellie frowns deeply as she eyes you, eyebrows furrowed and expression virtually unreadable.

“What are you doing here” she mumbles out, shifting on her feet awkwardly. Her question alone sets the fire off in your chest again, making you seethe as you take a deep inhale before responding.

“Are you kidding me Ellie?” You practically spit out, staring up at the girl in disbelief.

She lets out a soft sigh, her tattooed hand coming up to rub her face roughly before it moves up to rub through her hair.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” she manages before she tries shutting her door in your face. “You can’t be here” she mumbles out softly, the girl fully expecting to be able to shut the door.

You however, have other plans.

You’re quick to press your hand against the door, stopping her from closing it before you practically force yourself between it. Ellie’s eyes widen a bit at this, not used to seeing you so forward.

Soon, you’re pushing yourself into her apartment, your palm pressing against your forehead as you began pacing back and forth Ellie’s lavish apartment.

“I don’t…I don’t understand you Ellie. Is it something I said? Did I do something? If so please enlighten me I beg you” you blurt out, all of the words fumbling out of your mouth in one breath.

Ellie frowns deeply as she watches you pace back and forth her apartment, her eyebrows furrowed. She can truly see the damaged shes caused when she sees you like this, because it was much easier to watch you when you slept, so peaceful and unaware of the troubles that came with her absence. She knew you were going to blame yourself, and as much as she knew she couldn’t allow you to do that to yourself, she knew staying away was even more important.

Seeing you like this was possibly the hardest thing Ellie had to ever endure.

You don’t stop there, taking advantage of the lack of a response from Ellie to continue ranting.

“Is it because of the blood thing? If so I’m sorry. I am so fucking sorry for simply caring enough to make sure you didn’t die from starvation or whatever it is that happens to you when you don’t eat. I’m sorry for making sure that you were okay, if that was so wrong please tell me…” your words trail off as you let out an exasperated sigh, your feelings and emotions becoming far too much as you practically sob out to her.

But then you’re pausing, your chest rising and falling quickly as you struggle to catch your breath. Ellie isn’t entirely sure why you’ve suddenly stopped, your back towards her as you stand there, doing god knows what.

When you finally turn around, your eyes are red and your cheeks are wet with tears.

“Were you just….using me? As your personal fucking blood bag?” Your words are shaky as you hold back another sob, your fists balled down at your sides.

Ellie freezes when you say this, because this is exactly what she was fucking afraid of.

It was a common theme throughout…her people. Vampires were notoriously alluring, seducing countless innocent and clueless victims into being their personal meal. The humans were almost always oblivious to what was being done to them, vampires often times using this to their advantage to keep them under their spell for as long as possible. It would most commonly been done in a way that made the humans believe the vampires loved them, dangling them by a thread as they promised them a life of eternity together, to live in immortality, side by side until the end of times. It almost never ended that way though, the vampires would suck and suck and suck until one day they went a bit too far, and their obedient human keeled over and died.

Ellie never wanted things to be that way with you.

She never even wanted you to think it was that way. She wanted you to understand that this was entirely up to you, and it could stop whenever you wanted it to. It’s why she constantly voiced to you that this was still a factor right before she fed off of you. Ellie would rather die than use you for a source of food, because truthfully you were far too good for that, too fucking pure to be used as something as low as a food source.

So when the words leave your lips, Ellie sees red.

Shes in front of you in less than a second, towering over you and staring down into your tear soaked eyes. Her nostrils are flared as she tries to hold back from tearing down her entire apartment complex around the both of you.

“You can’t possibly be stupid enough to think I’d ever use you for something so low..” her voice is low, and there’s a gravel in it that makes your core tighten and your chest bloom with something you can’t quite place, a feeling that can only be shelved in your mind right next to where Ellie takes place.

You don’t hack one, hot tears continuing to spill from your eyes as you stare at her with furrowed eyebrows.

“It makes sense….get your fix and then leave me like I’m nothing…this was probably your plan all along” you grit out.

Ellie licks her lips, knowing that you’re hurting just as much as she is, and your words are simply coming from a place of confusion, desperate to understand why she did what she did to you, why she left without a trace.

She leans in, her face a mere inches from yours. You can smell her minty breath wafting onto your face, and it’s bizarre because even that has a slight chill to it. It makes your cheeks cold, and it makes you want to reach out and warm her up.

“I would rather die a million deaths before using you for that…you and I both know this” she seethes out.

And it makes you whimper, because Ellie’s always been so fucking intense, so poetic. It makes your insides flip upside down, and your eyebrows knit together as you struggle to hold back a whimper.

Your features soften as you continue to cry in front of her. “Then why did you leave me…” you whisper out to the girl.

It breaks her heart how desperate you are for this. Not even for her, but simply for answers. All you want is to understand why she left, what you did to make her abruptly disappear without a single word.

Ellie’s eyes flutter shut for a moment, her pink tongue darting out to lick her plush lips before she finally speaks.

“I’ve never…been so weak for someone…in my entire life” she breaths out.

It surely isn’t what you’re expecting her to say. You think she’s going to say she’s gotten enough of you, or she just couldn’t handle having someone like you around. Hell, you were even beginning to think she was trying to cover up all her roots here and start somewhere else.

“I always have been…from the moment I fucking laid eyes on you, I knew you weren’t good for me…you’re too good for me” she continues, her eyes fluttering open as she finally stares down into yours. You can finally look into yours as you blink away the tears that are pooling in your eyes and blurring your vision, and it allows you to see the pain in her eyes, just how much she’d been struggling with all of this.

“It isn’t even your blood…it made it worse, yes…but just being around you is like…it’s like a fucking drug to me. You give me this feeling that I can’t…I can’t even begin to describe how fucking euphoric you make me feel” each of her words sounds like a plea, a plea for you to let her go, to unhand her from the death grip you have on her.

“And suddenly I’m always in your apartment, and you’re offering yourself to me and it’s like a dream come true and I feel like a fucking monster when I’m on top of you, sucking you dry of your fucking blood” it’s her turn to start pacing, running her hands through her hair as she settles one of her hands on her hip, she moves slower than you were, simply voicing the struggles she’s seemed to have with you from the moment you met.

She finally turns towards you, and she’s slowing make her way to where you’ve been standing this entire time. When she’s right back where she was, stood right in front of you, she takes your hand into hers ever so gently. It’s enough to make you flinch, how cold she is in contrast to your hot skin. She sighs, bringing your hand up to cradle her cheek, and her eyes flutter shut, nearly rolling back as she presses a soft kiss to your palm.

“I’m not strong enough for you…I don’t think I ever will be” she finally admits, and it’s like she’s not only admitting it to you, but to herself as well.

You hold back a whine as she kisses your palm, her lips so soft, so gentle with you.

“Then…then don’t be…why can’t you just let things happen” you sigh out as you stare up at her, in awe as the girl leaned into your touch as if it were her life line.

You aren’t even entirely sure what you’re asking her for, what this so called ‘thing’ is that she won’t let happen. Is it the feeding you’re alluding to? An act of true platonic kindness? Or are you asking for more, are you begging for something that Ellie has deprived you both of for the sake of the greater good?

Both you and Ellie have these same questions running through your minds.

She chuckles dryly against your skin, shaking her head as her hand gives your wrists a gentle squeeze.

“You aren’t even sure what it is you’re asking for…not from someone like me” she admits, eyes opening as she finally looks down at you again.

“I can’t…give you the things you deserve. I’m not capable of being the perfect person for you, not when I am what I am” her words are like venom on her tongue, the girl utterly disgusted with the monster that she became against her own will, the hell that she was forced to live over and over again with no foreseeable end.

“The only thing I can do, is take from you…I take and take and take….” Her words trail off, a soft frown on her lips before she finally looks at you once again.

“Until I’ve taken everything that you have…and there is no more of you to offer” she whispers out, as if the mere thought of a world without you pains her so much to say, she barely wants to say it.

You lick your lips, your eyes searching hers before you quickly shake your head.

“Do you want me? The same way that I want you?” You question carefully, fearful of what it is that she might say, worried that you’d been reading things entirely wrong, even after Ellie basically confessed how utterly obsessed she is with you.

She smirks softly, humming lowly as she gently brings your hand down to her lips, pressing another gentle kiss to it.

“It’s like I’ve waited my entire life for you, baby….saying that I want you would be an understatement” she chuckles out softly.

And you aren’t entirely sure how it even gets to this point, because you marched over to Ellie’s apartment with a purpose, that purpose being to yell at her and get the answers you deserved. But suddenly you’re standing in front of her, and your heart is exploding with so many different emotions and feelings, all of them for Ellie, and she’s just confessed to you that she wants you like you want her.

And you have no choice, but to kiss her.

It catches Ellie off guard, a soft whine leaving her lips as accepts your lips with gratitude, her arms moving down to drape along your waist as she pulls you closer.

It’s everything she’s ever dreamt it would be. Your lips soft and sweet against her own, your skin so warm and inviting, making her drink you up, fueling her with the warmth she’s lacked since the day she died. But despite how good it feels, she knows this is wrong, and it goes against everything she said she’d do for your sake.

Ellie breaks way first, watching as you struggle to catch your breath from the intense kiss. She’s quick to stop you from leaning in again, her hand cupping your face as she stares into your eyes.

“Angel…we can’t…I told you, I’m no good for you” she sighs out, the words paining her to even say.

You give her a soft pout, your arms wrapping around her shoulders loosely as you press your warm body against hers.

“I trust you Ellie….I know that you’d never hurt me” you sigh out softly as you stare into her eyes, your hand coming up to tuck a strand of her soft hair behind her ear.

“We don’t have to do the blood thing…but I just…can’t we just give us a try?” Your eyes are wide as you speak, eager to feel Ellie’s lips against yours again, even if for a moment. You don’t even take into consideration that she could say no, that she could turn you around and throw you out of her apartment without another word, doubling down on what she said she’d do with you.

But as Ellie said before, she’s just too fucking weak for you.

And hearing you ask for it, ask for her, it has her stomach in knots, and she feels like no matter what it is you ask her, she couldn’t possibly say no to you.

“What are you doing to me…” she sighs softly before she leans in to kiss you again, reciprocating the passion and heat that you gave her mere moments ago. You whine against her, your hands sliding back to tug at her hair, keeping her close as your lips moves against hers, your warm tongue sliding against hers.

“Missed you so much…” you sigh against her, and it makes Ellie groan softly as she nods, hands sliding down to grip your waist as she walks you back towards her bedroom, lips never leaving yours.

“Missed you more than anything, angel” she mumbles against your lips as she presses her palm against her bedroom door behind you, pushing it open and leading you further inside.

Ellie’s bedroom smells like her. It’s dark, and cold but oh so comforting. You practically sigh against her lips when you feel her laying your body down against her black silk sheets, the expensive material like butter on your skin. It makes your senses go in overdrive, Ellie’s hands caressing your skin, roaming around your body as her tongue rubs against yours in a dirty, passionate kiss.

“Don’t know how long I’ve waited to have you like this…” she sighs softly, her lips breaking away from yours to kiss along your jaw, down to your throat. You don’t miss the way Ellie kisses the now faded marks of her teeth on your neck, licking the skin softly before she sucks into it, sure to leave dark marks in the morning.

“Missed marking you up baby….” She hums against you, drinking in the sweet moans that leave your mouth, the sound alone like music to her ears.

Your mind is fuzzy, almost blank besides the thoughts of Ellie that stood in the forefront of your brain. It was like she was filling you up entirely, making you almost overwhelmed with her. Her scent, her cold skin, her soft hands, all of it was almost too much, a combination of sensory overload that kissed your skin so deliciously.

Soon she’s kissing down your body, practically worshiping her as her lips work on your soft skin. Her hands are pushing up your t-shirt, kissing your stomach and your ribcage until she’s tugging you up a bit to skillfully slip your shirt over your head. You’re bare before her, her lips matching onto your pebbled nipples as her tattooed hands work on your soft shorts, tugging them down your legs.

You don’t miss the way her tongue swirls around your nipple before letting go with a pop, lips moving up to nip at your collar bone with her flat teeth. Hard enough to leave a mark, but gentle enough to not break skin.

You giggle softly, bending your legs back to help as she tugs your shorts and panties off. She’s slotting herself between your legs, humming softly as she gives you a smirk.

“Something funny baby?” She questions before leaning in to press another kiss to the corner of your lips. You nod, a dreamy smile on your lips as you bring your hand down to tug at the hem of Ellie’s t-shirt.

“Seems like old habits never die, that’s all….need this off” you huff out softly, fingers fumbling between the hem of her t shirt and the waistband of her sweats.

Ellie chuckles at how eager you are before she nods, pulling back to tug her shirt off before she rolls over a bit to pull off her sweats and underwear as well before she makes her way back between your legs, towering over you as she crawls into you like a predator would its prey.

And it leaves your pussy soaking wet, because it’s better than you could’ve ever imagined. Ellie’s tits are pebbled similarly to yours, tattoos littering her pretty skin, muscles so beautiful they could make your mouth fucking water.

You’d always seen Ellie for the beauty she possessed…but this? This was so much more different.

It made your head fucking spin.

You whined softly as you practically tug her into her by her shoulders, moaning softly at the feeling of her boobs squishing against yours as your mouth attacks her in a needy kiss.

“Want you…” you sigh softly against her as your hand slides down between the both of you, cupping her pussy. You feel Ellie suck in a sharp breath at the feeling of your warm fingers against her sopping wet core, and she gives you an eager nod before rolling over, her strong hands gripping your thighs and taking you with her as she forces you to straddle her.

Being on top of Ellie is just as good as being under her, almost better in all honesty. The lighting in her bedroom is dim, but you can just make out her features with the moonlight that spills in through her big windows, and the moody lights she has set up along her walls. You don’t even realize it because you’re too busy gawking at her, but she lifts her leg up a bit and easily slots you down so that your pussy is right against hers, the feeling making you moan softly.

“You’re so pretty Ellie…” you practically sigh out. It makes Ellie moan softly, and she swears the sound of you calling her pretty is enough to bring her back to life, reversing the effects of her undead state.

“Fuck…can’t say those things to me baby…you’re gonna…Jesus..ruin me” she struggles to get out as she grips your hips, forcing you to roll your hips so that your clit and her clit bumps against each other.

Your eyes flutter shut when you feel it. It’s so fucking wet, and soft, and it’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before. Sure you’d done it with other girls before, but this just feels…it almost feels like….

“Like you were fucking made for me princess” Ellie grits out, her teeth caging her words in as she fucks you down onto her pussy, practically using you for both hers and your pleasure.

You’re too far gone to pick up on it, too indulged in the feeling of Ellie’s strong hands gripping your thighs so deliciously, sure to leave marks in their shape when you both wake up in the morning.

Your back is arching almost painfully, your hand gripping her thigh as you find the rhythm Ellie has set for you, finding the perfect spot and keeping it there as you drive both you and her to your orgasms.

“I’m…Ellie you feel so good…you’re gonna make me cum” you squeak out, eyebrows furrowed as you finally look down at the girl beneath you, only to find that she’s just as much of a mess as you are. Her hair is messy and her lips look so pouty and kissable. It’s hard to make out, but her fanged teeth are pressing into her lips, and you’re sure it’s the sexiest thing you’ve seen in your entire life.

She gives you an encouraging nod, one of her hands coming to your ass and kneading it harshly before giving it a firm spank, the sinful noise echoing off the walls of her pristine bedroom.

“I know baby…I know…come on, want you to cum with me…that’s it…that’s my good girl” her praises make your chest burn, and it leaves knots in your stomach. It only drives you further, your hips moving faster as they roll against Ellie’s, desperately chasing both hers and your orgasm.

“Ellie…Ellie I’m…I’m gonna-“ you cry out, back arching as you grip her thighs quickly, feeling your own shake as your orgasm begins washing over you.

Ellie catches it right before it happens, the girl quickly sitting up and wrapping her arms around your body, pressing your chest against hers as she pulls you down to kiss her passionately, her own orgasm washing over her like a fucking train.

Your bodies are so in tune, so in sync that your moans almost mix to create a symphony that can only be described as love, total and unconditional love as her arms keep you close, as if stopping you from running away from her, from the feeling she gives you. Her lips are working against yours as you breath hard, struggling to catch your breath in the sloppy kiss.

You’re a whining mess, your poor pussy far too sensitive to deal with the amount of pleasure that Ellie brought to you, all of it washing over you like an intense sea of euphoria, nearly drowning you as you held onto the girl with weak hands.

She knows you’re weak, because she’s pulling you down to rest your warm body against her cool sheets, all while keeping her cool body pressed against yours to bring you back down to earth with her.

“That’s it baby…I know….did so good for me…” she sighs softly as she leaves gentle kisses against your cheeks and eyes, watching as the aftermath of your orgasm slowly pulls you to the depths of sleep, all of it too much on your body.

“My beautiful girl…my girl…my girl…” she hums out, almost like a song as she watches you cling to her in your sleep, soft hums and huffs leaving your lips, all of which makes Ellie smile adoringly at you as she holds you while you sleep.

And even while you’re settling into one of the deepest sleeps you’ve ever experienced, you don’t miss the soft kisses against your lips and cheeks, all paired with the constant, non stop praises from Ellie.

You especially don’t miss the way she leans in settles against the pillow next to you, mumbling the softest, sweetest words to you as her hands caressing your naked body.

“I love you, pretty girl..”

[baby--vera]

Blue Lock Boys as Dads

rin, sae, isagi, reo, kunigami, yukimiya

☆ミ

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itoshi rin

defo a girl and boy dad. older girl, younger boy vibes. when your pregnant he's definitely the type to get really fussy and not let you do anything incase you hurt yourself or the baby (he won't let you get a glass of water yourself). when your water broke he panicked and accidentally brought you to the wrong hospital...and you had to, as calmly as you could, tell him. and ge FREAKED out. when your baby was born it was all well, he took most night shifts to let you rest as much as you could, even though he's a professional athlete and should probably not be staying up, he would break the rules for you (and the baby too). fortunately, your second pregnancy experience was less chaotic as the first, rin still did the regular night shifts though <3

itoshi sae

only child dad vibes here. if its a girl, he would spoil her SOO much you'd have to scold him for it. but he still continues to treat your daughter like a princess behind your knowledge. on the other hand, if its a boy, he DEFINITELY bought the kid a football...he wouldn't force them to play but he would like his kid to at least try it. whether boy or girl, if they end up playing sports he would be at every match possible to support his child, even coaching them himself. your kid would be the star player of any sports team lol. but if your kid doesn't do sports, sae would also be very supportive of their hobbies, going as far as to buying the best equipment possible for it. however sae would be quite a strict dad from time to time, such as curfews and screen time. but in the end, he just wants what's best for his baby and to keep them safe <3

isagi yoichi

3 kids. he want 3 kids. obviously if you don't want that many he would respect your wishes but its just what his ideal family looked like in his imagination. he would be SOO helpful during and after your pregnancy. would give you massages, cook for you, carry you, anything you can name this guy has done for you. when it comes to taking care of the kids he definitely is big help too. he would carry them all the time and play with them all the time too. but when he's away for matches, you always facetime him before to say good luck and show him the kids in his jersey (he tears up it's too cute) but if isagi's match is nearby, you would bring your kids with you, of course wearing his jersey again, and cheer him on. he also will full on leg it to you all after a match to give you all big kisses (sometimes you might feature in his interviews too) <3

reo mikage

2 kids. either both girls or both boys. idk why i just thought of this when i thought of reo. when you tell reo you're pregnant he is over the moon, and he vows that he will not treat his kids like how his parents treated him, meaning he will let his kids have their own dreams insteaf of having to take over the mikage company. however, he will still spoil his children SO MUCH. you literally are face palming everytime he does. when your nearly about to give birth, he takes time off football (despite the disappointment from nagi lol) to take care of you and after you give birth. but when your children are a bit older he literally begs you to bring them to his matches and even gets you vip seats so they can see how cool their daddy is. if his matches are abroad, he will also pay for your plane tickets (in 1st class ofc) to come see him abroad and so he can see you and the kids. he will boast about it after the match <3

kunigami rensuke

kinda basing this off his own family but 2 girls and 1 boy. he's of course a REALLY good girl dad because he has younger sisters. he knows everything his 2 baby girls need and how they think (fr mind reader). as for his baby boy, he taught him football, of course. when we plays with his son he does play a little rough but not enough to hurt his kid. he would never forgive himself if he hurt his own kids, son or daughter. he love them all equally. (he's just a big teddy bear, even after wildcard he wouldn't treat his family any different) <3

yukimiya kenyu

2 kids. older boy and younger girl. yukimiya is the definition of GENTLEMAN. he is literally perfect. he researched everything when you told him you were first pregnant, so that he was prepared. everything went perfectly smoothly and soon, you two had your second baby. yukimiya also would take time off football to take care of you and the kids until they're manageable for you when he's away for matches. his son is a massive fan of his own father (who wouldn't be) and your baby girl is just there for the vibes lol. they have exact replicas of yukimiya's sports glasses and signed jerseys. but when the kids grow out of their baby jerseys, yukimiya gets a bit emotional, he cant bring himself to throw them away. so the frames the little baby jerseys in the living room if your house <3

here's a little thought/drabble for yall bc my maths series is taking a while...(im so sorry it will take a bit😔)

hope you like this and a smau should be out in a bit too ( 〃▽〃)

[aurorawhisperz]

I Just Wanna See You Shine (r.c.)

contains: smut (18+), swearing.

rafe cameron x overachiever!reader

summary: everyone counted on you to be the valedictorian, the go-to for tough subjects and the one who never got in trouble. one day, rafe cameron had came up to you for some tutoring but it turns out he was just paying for the pleasure of your company.

i just wanna see you shine ‘cause i know you are a stargirl.

if everybody was betting on valedictorian, everybody would be betting on you. you were the one person who had it all figured out; high grades, perfect attendance, a reputation for never stepping out of line.

no drama. no distractions. no boyfriend. you were the only person who actually cared about deadlines, assignments and getting into a good college even as a rich kid.

at kildare academy, no one really cared about what you did or didn’t do. everyone was rich, privileged, and used to getting what they wanted.

graduation wasn’t a huge deal; chances for success were handed to you with a silver spoon. the kooks had money, connections, and opportunities waiting for them at every turn. even if they flunked a test, they’d still get into the best colleges, all thanks to their families’ influence and wealth.

people didn’t expect much from your personal life, if anything, they just assumed you didn’t have one, too busy studying to bother with parties or boys. and even if you did, rafe cameron would be the last name anyone would think of.

he was everything you weren’t; wild, reckless, the kind of guy who didn’t care about grades or the future. he drove fast cars, lived life with no sense of direction. and you? you were the complete opposite.

right now, you’d find yourself breaking a rule you swore you’d never cross, all because of that stupid boy.

you knew he was up to no good the minute he slipped those silver glasses off of your face.

this was the tenth-ish guttural moan rafe had let out. his eyes fluttering closed for a moment as he feels your walls squeezing around him. rafe was completely lost to the need, the primal desire for you. the one thing missing from his great list of achievements. his body strained with the effort to resist the urge to take you, to make you his.

rafe was completely at your mercy, completely undone, his body twitching with need as you moved your hips against him. his eyes were locked onto yours, his stare desperate and pleading, his voice a ragged whisper as he moaned your name over and over again, each repetition edged with a hint of desperation, as if he couldn’t stand to be without you for even a moment.

“why are you so fucking good at this?” he breathed out, a little surprised, but also impressed. his mouth hanging open with every movement.

“one terrible experience,” you replied matter-of-factly. “i didn’t bother with anyone else. i don’t waste time. i’m a fast learner, though. especially when it comes to… watching. visual things tend to stick.”

you never would’ve imagined that rafe cameron, the kook prince, the guy who practically owned kildare island, would be wrapped around your little finger. but somehow, he was.

his mouth watered as you leaned over him, your boobs hovering so close to his mouth. his hands clenching around the bedsheets, his body rigid as he waits for you to say something.

rafe swallowed hard, his breath coming in quick gasps, his entire body tense and straining with the effort to hold back. the effort to stop himself from rolling you both over and to stop himself from fucking you so dirty, but in this moment, rafe was completely under your control, and he knows it. he can't help but want you.

“you can touch me.” you held onto his shoulder for some sense of control as you continued rolling your hips. rafe let out a low, guttural moan as you gave him permission, his eyes closing briefly as he waited for you to descend closer. then he leaned upwards, taking your breast in his mouth, his tongue swirling around your nipple as he suckles you, his hands moving to your hips, holding you in place.

rafe’s hips bucked up into you as he slid himself deeper, his voice a low, ragged moan. “you feel so good..” he gasps. “feel so damn good…i can’t get enough of you…fuck…”

“yeah?” your thumb moved to rub over his bottom lip. “can’t get enough of me?”

rafe’s hands grabbed at your hips, his touch nearly painful.

“we’re gonna do this again, and again, and again, darlin’,” he muttered, his voice low and rough as he thrusted up into you. “all” slap. “night.” slap. “long.” slap.

you pulled on your clothes, moving quietly as rafe laid there, worn out and more exhausted than you’d ever seen him. but that smile tugging at the creases of his lips—his smirk that you knew so well was still there. his voice broke the silence, his tone lazy, but with that familiar edge of smugness. “looks like i got something, or someone, to add to my collection,” he said, the words carrying a challenge, as though he was satisfied by the moment but still trying to hold some control.

as you reached for your shoes, he propped himself up on one elbow, his voice thick with that cocky tone as he started running his mouth again. “well, well, look at you. the overachiever, the one everybody thought was untouchable, sucked right into my world.” rafe let out a low chuckle and his eyes locked onto yours. "guess it fits the narrative. you were the only thing missing from the story.”

you stood up, slipping on your shoes but you couldn't help the grin that tugged at your lips even if his words punched your ego so badly.

moving closer, you leaned down slightly, lowering your voice to a seductive whisper. "if you tell anyone," you said, your words deliberate, "i’ll have to tell them about how you were so willing to submit and how you were shaking and almost crying under my control.”

without giving him a chance to say anything back, you pressed a quick kiss to his lips, a short one but it left a spark behind. you walked confidently to the door, not glancing back until you reached the threshold.

“see you around, kook prince,” you tossed your bag over your shoulder. rafe shifted, a devilish smirk lighting up his face, and replied with that trademark cockiness, “see you around, princess.”