#what the fuck is up with the prince of death anyways
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An analysis of Mastermind (the Song)
Now this is gonna focus primarily on Stolas's perspective throughout this whole song. Not that I think Blitzø or Satan's parts are less interesting they're just more straightforward than the rest of it and I don't think I can expound on them that much.
So first we have Stolas using societies already baked in prejudices against imps to immediately square away the idea that Blitzø could be to blame for the whole thing. And you'll notice that when he's doing this he's putting on the same persona that he used in Circus when he got Blitzø out of trouble with his security guards. The act of a haughty Prince that is taking responsibility for an imp. It's a bit of a go to for him.
Then he starts building up the idea of a Mastermind whose actually behind it all that just using Blitzø for nefarious purposes. I also want to point out the look on Ozzie's face here because it is expressing exactly what I was thinking when I first watched this which was " what the fuck are you going on about Stolas?"
But if you notice something that I'll talk about a bit more later he's not saying he's the Mastermind at this point. He's just talking about a vague Boogeyman esque mastermind here.
Then he goes on to detail what killing Blitzø like this would mean in Hell. First he's doubling down on how lowly he is, meaning he couldn't possibly have done it and that he is clearly just a scapegoat. Basically telling them that doing so won't solve anything. But then next he says that it would "light a fire in the hearts of his race" which as we see afterwards, it did. This whole song stoked massive support for Blitzø and if we remember resulted in the first time in history where an imp sentenced with death got away and survived.
Fuck it! I am the Mastermind. There is the briefest moment here where Stolas closes his eyes and thinks. Right before he says Fuck It. I don't think Stolas had fully cemented on the idea of taking the blame himself until this point. I think this is the point where he realized he can't back down from this, he can't just make up a Mastermind he has to be the Mastermind. I think he has this sort of as the plan the whole time but that he was also giving himself a bit of an out before by being vague. He could have said he was the Mastermind the entire song but this was the moment he started taking full ownership of the title.
I have no regrets/ I have regrets. Publically Stolas is saying that he has no regrets about the whole scheme that he used Blitzø for. But then we immediately go into private mode where Stolas is having some regrets and second thoughts about doing this. He says " why am I throwing my life away for this idiot?" He doesn't like doing this but he's going to anyway.
And he decides to do it because the alternative is Blitzø dying. And that is too horrible of a fate for him to bear. Stolas probably also feels actual responsibility for the whole situation because he made the deal to let Blitzø use the book knowing it was illegal. So if he can do anything to let Blitzø live, this is it and he's gotta do it. So then we get to
I am the Mastermind, the master of my faith. No looking back, we're doubling down. Full on. So much of Stolas arc as a character is culminating in this moment. For so long he has just been a puppet in other peoples plans. He has never been in charge of his own life but now he is the master behind his own decisions and steering his own fate. Even if it's at his own detriment. He sings about how much he loves Blitzø and death itself is the only thing that can break them. He is resolved to this fate and he's taking it head on.
There are so many fucking layers to this episode, it's a gift that keeps on giving. It's my favorite episode containing my favorite Helluva Boss song. I hope you enjoyed this attempt at a breakdown I did.
#helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#stolitz#blitzø#stolas#Mastermind#mastermind spoilers#song analysis
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so hey guys i finished dungeon meshi yesterday and i'm still thinking about it
#ria.txt#i spoiled myself so at first i was like 'this is bonkers wtf are they doing in those last few chapters?????'#but then it was like. yeah. i see#love those ch when it's just clearly putting the squad into Situations#also. izutsumi#what i really liked was how tightly the protagonist and the deuteragonist were wound up in the overall themes#the plot the themes the conflict the characters it was very neatly connected#hence i am also now accidentally invested in whatever going on between laios and marcille#not just platonic not romantic not enemies i just think they work well tgt and deeply care for each other its great watching them develop#it's the leader + most trusted advisor / anxious girlfailure + the annoying freak she's somehow attached to vibes#haha that rabbit chapter with marcille. hahha i was like what the fuck man. it was funny and then boom whump [tears streaming down my face]#those shapeshifter chs were sooo much fun esp seeing other chara's perceptions of each other. stealing that#the changeling ones were great too elf senshi is the fucking funniest he looks sooooooo unserious#marcille's evolving perception with death starting with saving falin and saving the squad and her nightmares of outliving everyone-#-and her dad and her 'temper tantrum' and UGH when at the end she said she was fine with falin not coming back.... WAAA. OUGH.#i think dunmeshi handled the trope of 'prophecy of chosen one becoming king' pretty well and it makes sense why laios is the protag#the worldbuilding is so thoughtful as well i liked seeing different characters with different worldviews interact#very solid and well rounded series wooo#the main 4 has such a fun dynamic together#anyways. dunmeshi au.....#more like borrowing the worldbuilding bc charas are too nuanced for a one to one comparison#ren is like some prince of his own species but he's like 34th in line and no one cares about him so he fucks off to eat monsters#which is why he's both snobbish AND a total freak when it comes to his food taste#false is originally in for the money from ren and plans to scam him but unfortunately the cringefail swag captures her#martyn is Obnoxiously Clueless and thinks he's smart but he's not. he's resourceful but also pathetic and crazy#stress cant cook but she thinks she does so everyone goes (â_â ) when she picks up a pot. they delegate her to killing and chopping duty#the mvp is iskall who keeps on saving everyone's asses and somehow has resources for everyone#i think ren is actually aware false is going to scam him but he has too much money to spend anyway and he thinks shes cool so he lets her??#and somehow she doesnt take the money and run. and goes back to eating monsters w/ the party. everyone is crazy
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ah. hm. ykw important context for that last post would be that the oracle was heavily involved with the light infiltrating her world + sowing a million seeds of ruin which lead to her friends đ§ who once had a bond of steel turning so intensely against each other + taking the world down w them if it meant the other would fall
#i dont want to say she's directly guilty or responsible but ykw. she was the unknowing mole!!! the foothold! the conduit!#anyways this is why she's not like DEATHâźď¸âźď¸ when yubel waltzes into the Haou dimension.. she's a bit blindsided by it being Yubel of all#people. and then haou comes back + jesse is also there and she's like oh this is some sick theater on the light's part đ well at least we#are all trapped here now and it will die with us đđ¤ˇđťââď¸#I can't put it into words but. despite doing fucked up shitâ Haou and Yubel were victims of the light yk. so when it comes time to unravel#the threadsâ she can't allow them to go up to bat despite probably having enough juice to pull the ritual off#they finally get a chance at life without the light (she cannot accept it is an omnipresent force of nature đđ) whereas SHE!!! was the one#who invited it to poison them at the start. so if anyone is dying it's her. and also this poor teenager who is also her but look man đ#them's the breaks!! đ¤ˇđťââď¸đđđ#as for yubel... I truly need to sit w their whole narrative because im not sure why they wouldn't want lana dead lol!#the only point in Lana's favor is that So Much Time has passed that they care less about the distant transgressions of the Oracle+ more#about having Haou back forever. BUT... having a fragment of the oracle around is inherently threatening to this goalâ no?#and also. besides being the only mf left behind in the first big shift + therefore prime real estateâ I also reason that Yubel has it out#for Jesse to the degree they do because A) the romance B) this blueberry bitch is the walking talking prince who was 15 seconds from#blasting Haou to oblivion before in a useless move for power. he betrayed Haou then and he will betray Jaden now do better to eliminate the#risk altogether AND what better way to provoke Haou out of his slumber than by using Jesse! two birds with one stone#by this logic Yubel should be throwing Lana into an incinerator... because who was in the Prince's earâ pushing him towards his betrayal of#Haou?! the oracle!!!! so having her around is like. code red!#I'll have to figure this angle out but that will happen later đ
âŁď¸#sriracha.txt#oracule momence
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IF YOU LET ME : TODOROKI SHOUTO x READER
SUMMARY: Disguised as a eunuch in the imperial palace, a mistake on your part leads to your unmasking before the prince. By rights it should mean your death, but Prince Shouto seems to have another plan in mind... CONTENT: Imperial Prince Shouto, AFAB fem reader, identity reveal, class differences, slight gender fuckery, historical sexism, implications of past sexual threats, vaguely imperial Japanese setting, deep historical inaccuracy, SFW (2.2k) NOTES: This was a barely-edited unplanned little thought demon I had to exorcise lol, thank you for being patient with me. Back to our regularly scheduled programming soon.
Your breast bindings were missing.
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.
You flipped your sleeping mat again, clawing through your blankets frantically, hoping youâd somehow missed them the first time. But only the tatami floor stared back up at youâstrands of woven rice straw pale and bare.
You muttered a curse under your breathâyouâd definitely forgotten to extract your bindings from where youâd shucked off yesterdayâs robes, forgotten to squirrel them away before sinking into bed. And now theyâd been whisked away by a palace maid to be laundered. Or worse, discovered.
Your eyes darted through your small sleeping chamber frantically, seeking a solution. You were already late for Prince Shoutoâs first lesson of the day, and you needed all the time you could get with him today. Youâd promised the Minister of Rites that youâd have a word with the prince, to try to persuade Shouto to accept the wife he was so persistently putting his advisors off on.
You were, after all, the princeâs closest confidantâhis personal secretary and calligraphy tutor, an unthreatening eunuch from the lower classes with whom Shouto was clearly most at ease. And at least most of that was trueâyou did have Prince Shoutoâs trust, friendship, and respect, as much as a member of the imperial family could bestow on a commoner, anyway.
If he was going to listen to anyone on the subject of taking a wifeâat the very least one concubine, if not his future empressâit would be his trusted friend the eunuch.
There was just one very important detail that everyone, even His Highness, was mistaken about on that account.
One blasted detail that could get you killed at best were anyone to figure it out.
Your eyes fell back to your blankets, and you immediately grabbed two fistfuls, yanking as hard as you could until you felt the fabric give, the rip and tear echoing in the small space of your sleeping chamber. You kept ripping until a strip came free, a little smaller than what you usually had to work with.
But you were not about to complain, not at a time like this.
You flung the strip down to scrabble with the tie of your underrobe, unknotting it with fumbling fingers. You were just about to fling it off of you when there was a careful knock against the screen of your door.
You didnât manage to stifle your reflexive scream, stumbling through a half-executed turn towards the door. The screen was suddenly thrown back with alarming force, Prince Shoutoâs figure filling the doorway.
You yanked your shirt closed again, panicking, as you caught sight of the concern on his handsome face. You barely registered the other details, mind tripping over excuses, unable to appreciate the way his shoulders looked all the broader in his sokutai the way you normally did.
âAre you well?â Shouto demanded, his normally soft tone a little ragged. You watched his mismatched eyes dart quickly around your chambers, as if seeking a threat, only to drop back to you when there was none.
âYour Highness,â you said, lost for anything else.
âI heardâthere was a scream,â he said, his eyebrows scrunching the tiniest bit.
He always looked his most beautiful when he was confused, you thought, focusing hard on a particular problem. Not that a common woman had any business thinking anything about the crown prince, never mind a woman masquerading as a man. But it was hard to ignore a face that beautiful, the way his gaze sharpened with focus, full mouth pursing as he thought through a problem.
He looked like that now as his gaze darted over you. And then suddenly his eyes dipped to your collarbone, and his features went perfectly, horribly still.
An elegant hand reached back, and he immediately drew the screen closed behind him, eyes never leaving you as he took another step into the room.
You stumbled back, almost tripping over your bedding. You did not dare to turn towards him or away, scuttling sideways instead like a nervous crab.
âYour Highness,â you began again, heart shooting into your mouth when Shoutoâs long fingers tangled in your undershirt.
âAre you hurt?â he asked, his tone softening. You gripped your shirt closed as hard as you could against the tug of his fingers. âDid something happen?â
âN-nothing,â you stammered, not liking the way it made him clearly more suspicious. âI was just changing.â
But Shoutoâs beautiful, cursed eyes dipped to your bedding, where the torn strip lay across your blankets in plain sight. You could almost see the calculation as his eyes widened the tiniest fraction, and his grip tightened on your robes. Of course heâd seen it, and of course it looked like a wound dressing youâd just been about to apply.
He took another step closer, too close, until you could feel the heat of him through your sleeve, smell the sweet blend of dried herbs the servants kept his clothing stored with.
You tried to twist out of Shoutoâs grip without rucking up your shirt, but his hold was too strong.
âLet me see,â he ordered in his soft, low tone. Your heartbeat kicked up higher, hammering in your chest so hard it could have broken a rib.
It was a death sentence to ignore an order from a member of the imperial family. It was also a death sentence to reveal what youâd been these many years. You hoped Prince Shouto, something of a friend to you, would let you off lightly for ignoring him.
âPlease, Your Highness,â you said, clinging even harder to the closure of your shirt. âI will be ready in just a moment, I am simply running late. I beg your forgiveness.â
But if there was one thing about the crown prince, it was that he was stubborn, bullheaded when it came to the ideas and goals he took seriously. And he had always made it clear he took your friendship seriously.
That perfect mouth shifted into a frown. âI order you to let me see,â he said, his tone still soft but firm. âYou will let me.â
You froze under his hands, muscles locking up in panic. Shouto was still between you and the door, and your chambers were not wide enough for you to slip around him without him being able to easily catch you. He was also, unfortunately, extremely quick with sharp reflexes honed by years of swordsmanship. There would be no escaping this situation.
Fuck. Fuck, you were out of ideas.
âHold still,â Shouto commanded gently, long fingers prying your stiff ones away from the shirt ties. You watched his face in mute panic, not wanting to see the flash of betrayal and disgust, but unable to look away as he prised your robes aside. Shame heated your cheeks.
Shoutoâs long eyelashes dipped, before his gaze froze on your chest. For a second, he went as stiff as you. Then he was yanking your robes closed again, a watercolor of pink washing across the bridge of his nose and those high cheekbones.
His eyes darted back to yours, his expression perfectly still though his face was flushed. âYou never told me,â he said accusingly.
The right thing to do in this situation was to go to your knees in a kowtow and beg for his mercy, but Shouto still had a grip on your robes and did not look like he meant to let go. You ducked your head in as much of a bow as you could manage, your face warm. âYour Highness, I have no excuse. I have betrayed you.â
When you had concocted this scheme, you had wanted to put yourself beyond the reach of a local official back in your home village. His advances were becoming increasingly aggressive, and as a common woman, you had no recourse. You could only escape into a place where his rule was circumvented by a superior one, where no man would think to have an interest in you.
You had not intended to become Prince Shoutoâs tutor, had not anticipated the true risk of your gambit until it was already too late. But you would still rather die than be returned into the hands of your villageâs preceptor.
If this is how it endedâŚ
âI have compromised you,â Shoutoâs voice startled you out of your memories.
You glanced up at him, befuddled.
Shoutoâs fingers twisted in your robes. âJust now, andâall the many times we have been alone until now. I did not know.â
Honor and compromise were the least of your concerns right now, and would matter even less in the event of your death. You did not know where the prince meant to go with this.
âYour Highness, you were not expected to know,â you said, shame coiling in your belly. You would make the same choices you had made over again, if given the chance, but you had never meant to betray Shouto. You had genuinely liked him, and you would regret losing the chance to be by his side in the years to come.
Shoutoâs eyes flicked over you in some kind of assessment. He lifted one hand from your shirt, gasping your scholarâs cap and tugging it free from your hair. You felt his fingers tangle so very gently in the strands of your hair, seeking out the ties and pins.
Your own eyes traced over him as he did, drinking in the firm planes of his chest in his sokutai, the dark blue a beautiful contrast with his pale skin. You heard pins dropping to the ground beside you, as Shouto rubbed a strand of your hair between his fingers. He seemed to be evaluating you in a new light, relearning your appearance though a clearer lens.
Disgust and betrayal were not evident in how delicately he was handling you. You did not know what this meant.
âThey will put you to death if they know,â Shouto said, eyes slowly moving from the hair between his fingers to your face again. âYou cannot hide like this forever.â
You did not know what other choice was to be had. If Shouto did not plan to put you to death himself, then what other choice did you have than to go on pretending?
Shoutoâs gaze dropped to your mouth and you realized youâd spoken the thought aloud.
âThere is one other way to put you beyond the reach of the court,â he said slowly.
You felt your eyebrows raise in question. âI cannot think of it, Your Highness.â
Shouto absently curled the strand of your hair about his fingers, the little crease between his perfect eyebrows appearing again. He looked the way he did when he played games with his strategy tutor, or when he was thinking hard on a new sword form.
âThe ministers wish for me to take a wife,â Shouto said softly. âMy household is mine to manage alone.â
Outside the laws of the court, he meant. A strange flutter went through you, heat spotting your cheeks again. Shoutoâs presence before you was suddenly magnified a hundred fold, and you became singularly aware of the breadth and height of him, the heat of him almost against you.
âYou do not want a wife,â you said, well aware of the many years heâd spent bullheadedly resisting the idea.
âI do not want any the ministers have selected for me,â Shouto corrected.
Your whole body felt flushed again. He meant he was amenable to you.
You had never let yourself think it but he was more than amenable to you as well.
âI would keep you safe,â he promised.
You almost slumped to the floor in relief, only Shoutoâs grip on you keeping you upright. You would not die. You would not be returned to your village. You would, through all of this, it seemed, keep Shoutoâs friendship.
âI know you would,â you said.
Shouto understood your acceptance. Slowly his fingers untwined themselves from your hair, and he drew your robes more firmly around you. Your body burned hot, still, stomach fluttering under his renewed brand of regard.
âI will arrange it quickly,â Shouto said. âYou must stay here. I will send someone for you.â
You nodded.
Shouto looked regretful as he stepped back from you. âWe will do it properly, later,â he said. âI will pay my respects to your family.â
You waved a hand frantically, shocked by the idea of the future emperor making his bows in your familyâs rundown hut. It was not as though you would be his first-ranked wife or empress! He did not need to pay any respects to the family of a concubine out of a common family!
âThere is no need,â you insisted, but Shouto was already turning towards the door. You could see by the set of his shoulders this was another thing he meant to be stubborn about.
âI will honor my first and only wife,â he said, turning to pin you with that heterochromatic gaze.
Your mouth dropped open in shock, but you had no time to reply before he was sliding the door closed behind him again, leaving you alone with the sudden weight of the statement. It had all happened so quickly, you had never expected that Shouto meant what he did.
You wondered what it meant that Shouto had made such a promise so readily, when he had known the truth about you for only minutes.
And you wondered if, like your original entry into the palace, you were getting yourself into something far beyond what you initially understood.
#todoroki x reader#shoto x reader#todoroki shouto x reader#todoroki shoto x reader#shouto x reader#shouto x you#todoroki x you#todoroki x y/n#mha x reader
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My understandings of what Primarchs are currently alive and dead, what their status' are: Loyalists: Leman Russ: Running butt ass naked in the Warp, if the armour if any indication. Probably a Wulfen and horribly mutated like Corvus. Possibly could be fine. Chances very slim for him not be a mutated wolf thing with viking braids. Anyway his sons are mildly disturbed by the armour they keep finding Lion: Alive and pissed. Commits so many war crimes behind Guilliman's back. May or may not be making it his personal goal to give Guilliman as many grey hairs as possible. Roboute Guilliman: Stressed and thinks humans can't rule themselves. Asshole. Needs a break and to actually spend time with humans and actually thinking about the fact it's been ten thousand fucking years. That's impressive for an empire. Corvus Corax: Fucked up bird man in the warp. Probably learning that feathers suck to get blood out of and questioning how the fuck his white winged brother kept his feathers so fucking clean even though said brother routinely caused blood baths in life. Has probably pecked someone to death. Vulkan: Probably alive. Somewhere. Might actually be in a volcano somewhere. His death goes against his lore so who knows what the fuck is going on here. Jaghatai Khan: Also in the warp, has no idea where the fuck he is and isn't stopping for directions. Honestly he's actually existed the warp couple of times he was going so fucking fast. Probably also slowly getting mutated. Might be fine though. Probably passed a naked Leman a couple of times and is really confused by the fucked up bird thing calling itself Corvus. Rogal Dorn: Could be dead, could have a sick ass prosthetic hand. No idea what's going on with him. Sanguinius: Incredibly dead. Probably a good thing that he is. Otherwise he'd probs be a traitor primarch too with the Imperium in its current state- Ferrus Manus: Also very dead. Probably was seething mad at being killed by Fulgrim. Very likely died seething mad. Traitors: Fulgrim: Is a four armed winged snake thing. Having mad sex and doing way too many drugs. Probably also eating a lot too. And then sleeping it off because snake. Has a chunky boyfriend if Tumblr is to be believed. Magnus: Trying to rebuild, also an arrogant prick. I support him even if he's a dick. If only because what happened to Prospero was a travesty of the highest order. You go my weird rainbow nipple horned demon prince. What is your obsession with titty horns??? Mortarion: Depressed but has family. Is infected with diseases that are probably not even invented yet. Probably also not a skinny rail of a man anymore courtesy of Papa Nurgle who is a better dad then the Emperor ironically. Probably can't stand to look himself in the Mirror. Angron: Angy, so very angy. And obsessed with blood. Even if he wasn't immortal by virtue of being a demon prince, he'd probably be too angry to die. Not entirely sure if this is actually better then being dead. Lorgar: Not entirely sure, but I assume he's somewhere in the warp spreading the word of chaos like some sort of messed up anti jesus or something.
Alpharius /Omegon: One's dead, the other is alive. Which twin died and which one is alive is a damn good question. Possibly neither are even dead. Absolute bastards (affectionate). Perterabo: Grumpy old man wanting to be left alone and forge. He yearns for it. Mostly content to just make stuff and burn his skin off. Good things he's a demon now I guess. Go make stuff, have a hobby that's kinda healthy. Sort of. Konrad: Pretty dead. Saw it happen and let it happen. Probably for the best because dear god this man as a demon prince is terrifying. Horus: Also very dead. Might actually be even more dead then Sanguinius considering Horus' soul was probably destroyed.
#I was quite drunk when I wrote this so take it with a grain of salt#also haven't read any of the books#literally mostly know it through tumblr#Leman deserves to run around naked#feel free to add on#as I said#very drunk right now#warhammer 40k#warhammer 30k#primarchs#magnus the red#rogal dorn#mortarion#horus lupercal#sanguinius#leman russ#fulgrim#Perterabo#konrad curze#lorgar aurelian#jaghatai khan#alpharius omegon#Angron#ferrus manus#lion el'jonson#roboute guilliman#vulkan#corvus corax#enjoy my rambles
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Training Techniques
Winter Soldier x Reader He is not allowed to move an inchâhe can only watch you pleasure yourselfâbut why is there a ring on your finger?
Warnings - smut, light angst, mastrubation(f), rough sex, choking, breeding kink Words - 2600 ââ
âââ§âââ
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ââ You have absolutely no pleasure in the work in which you sometimes so madly indulgeâtraining the assets with delicacy of words with which their handlers donât approve ofâSoldat is your favorite, with his expression of endless and unconditional gratitude and a silent promise of complicity unto deathâhe may not remember your face, but he always remembers your voice, its' gentleness. The soporific air of your room, in the soft breath of bread and sweetsâhe was sent there, because he was misbehaving again.
It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that you have periled this life and reputationâbut here you areâon your bed trying to sleep when you see him sitting on the chair, waiting. And this isn't a romance. You're not a damsel in distress and he is not the handsome prince who comes to save youâthis is his desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of the impending doom, but they didnât know that.
You know.
He can't stop looking at youâSoldat is gazing at a distant star. It's dazzling, but the light is from tens of thousands of years ago, because he is not allowed to move until you instruct him to.
Subconsciously, he licks his lips at the sight at your body in a night dress and wonder if he will ever just cum in your mouth as you suck him off to your kneesâŚor if heâll take you by the hair before heâs finished and fuck you into a sobbing heap before blowing his load. It doesnât seem worth the risk âbut he wanted this for so long now, he needs to voice it.
âPlease-â âan irrational and indulgent mistake. you stand up on your elbows in shock at the word he uttersâhis eyes drift leisurely back up to your face and his lips twitch. Soldat has fallen into a state of feverish lust, but that is not a justification for his disobedience. His heart goes into a shameless delirium when your eyes meet. âDesperate?â you mock, but underneath the mockery Soldat finds a reservoir of understanding. You lay back on the bed as nothing has happened, and your voice takes on a restful strength âI still need to punish you for that, Winterâ He behaves as naturally, with such discretion, that he does not lose his composure, not even when you remove your wedding ringâwho committed the impertinence of marrying you? He goes through a crisis of disappointment, fury, jealousy, but this is your way of giving Soldat a layer of respectâhe wants to call it loyalty. And maybe you can be his or maybe you will be entwined in this sexless foreplay tonight.
He wants to ask so many questions, but he canât. Not now. There is a pent-up curiosity, hysteria of his unsatisfied needs, unnaturally suppressed communion and also a kind of tense respect, because if he is obedient enoughâhe will be rewarded.
âYou will watch me, that's all you will do for nowâ you say, your voice has sunk to a whisper. Your words stoke a warmness in his stomach, a fire in his crotch. And he doesnât care what you will do with himâeven if you want to cut him, sharpen him however you pleaseâthat's all he knows anyways. He wants this memory to stay what it is, one intense moment, something that is strong and sweet enough to stand on its own. Your room has turned into an idyllic paradise for a good many years, your skin glistening in the light coming from the slits in the blinds as your hands play with your breast through the nightgown. He has lost his voice and a thread of cold sweat runs down the path of his spine, suffocating with heat, because of the black leather clothesâthe stiff collar and the tight harness that is restricting his breathing, is becoming increasingly annoying.
His eyes are growing moist with indignation, with angry impotence, and for the first time, he is barely controlling himself. It is the natural sequel of an unnatural beginningâhe needs to be patient, but itâs hardânot harder than his cockâIt's more erotic, more intense to watch you touch yourself. He is master of what he does, but never of what he desires. You are greatly overestimating his self-control. But this is what you are testing tonightâhis ability to subordinate the impulse to fuck you. Self-control might be as passionate and as active as the surrender to passion, but you need to show him who is in charge while your panties are becoming steadily slicker. All you need to do is to tell him to come, but you refrain from doing the thing you want so badlyâto be consumed by Winter. You glance up to find his eyes blazing with raw needâblue orbits pleading for you to command him. You spread your legs open, positioning yourself in front of himâone hand still toying with your nipple while the fingers of the other hook in your panties and drag them down your legs slowly before throwing them in his direction. His breath stutters as they land on his left boot and Soldat eyes them wickedly, knowing that all he can do is watch.Â
"Good, very good, Soldat '' you coo, sliding two fingers into your core, scissoring and stretching, curling over the one sweet spotâimagining his metal digits. You remove them as your index finger takes their place, rubbing slow, torturous circles on your clit, sliding down to tease your opening, then back up. Over and over again.
He slides his tongue across his teeth, remembering the taste of your nectar, becoming more and more aroused with every beat of his heart that runs down his shaft.
âI want you so much, goshâ he is stirred by the lust in your smooth voice. You are breathing deep with your mouth wide openâhe doesnât blink, he doesnât dare blink. Soldat can swear he feels the pressure of your palms on his cheeksâor is it a memory? Everything is a memory to him. âI want you here, fucking meâ There is something raw and pleading in your voice that surpasses sexual desire, these fleeting moments of carnal craving.
With the auspicious attention of a strained killing machine, he examines your fingers, your shivering body and listens to your muffled moans meticulously. It is such a tumultuous and intemperate invasion to his mindâyour scandalous behavior is pulling at every string of his nerves and self-control.
It is such a prolonged act, so meticulous, so rich in all aspects as you are giving yourself over to the deserved adoration of your own body and pleasure. It leaves Soldat breathless at the tremendous spectacle of your nudity and lack of shame as you bring yourself closer to the edge.
âJesus-I am so closeâ You confess, surprised at how fast the arousal is budding. You arch your back and hips buckle like an electric current runs through your body, moaning, rubbing your clit faster, forcing yourself to let out a louder moan. The orgasm wrecks your body from head to toe and being watched by a ferocious male is excitingâall he needs is a feeling as primitive and as simple as that of love.
You see his eyes, still unblinking and you feel menaced by some invisible dangerâyou are keenly aware of every movement, every breath you take. Lust is a weed that grows in the vacant lots of an abandoned mind and the stacks of bad words that you have been forced to swallow, spills âSoldat, come hereâ you command, languid and serious.
You lick your lips, trying to quench the thirst for him. Your throat is dry as you watch him between your spread legs, getting up and slowly coming towards the bed as his thick, black pants fall to the floor around his feet, the belt clattering noisily. Winter craws on top of you and he cannot articulate a word, capable only of an animal sound, a strangulated wheeze that shocks him deeply, enraging him, this sudden loss of the faculty of speech that feels somehow bestial and forgotten. He breathes, his chest rising and falling so close to yours.
âKiss m-â you whisper the words, and before you even finish saying them, his mouth is on yours and you are melting under his lips, eyes flutter shutâand it is blissful oblivionâgiving you the most intense and explosive kiss you two have ever shared. With the coldness of his lips and the warmth of his tongue beneath yours, you vow an endless bliss. He pulls back with a groanâWinterâs sky-blue eyes stare back into yours, and in his eyes you can see no parting from you. You put your hands on either side of his face, and the room falls away. You have never gotten so lost in a kiss before. And the kiss is not gentle. It is a wrestle of who would lead the excursion into the territory of passion and ecstasy, heat and unending craving for one another. You suck on his lower lip between your teeth and he lets out a low groan. It sounds almost aggravated and definitely impatient. Fire looks into his quiet eyes, touches his dear, familiar faceâyou lean upwards for a moment and dip your head towards his ear, grazing his soft skin with your teeth, while your hand slides to the harness. Soldat stills, angling his mouth towards your bare, perfect neck. You feel a warm slickness on your skin, his tongue trailing a path towards your shoulder.
It is a wild, animalistic compulsion, an urgent need as he suddenly slots himself between your legs and you turn your head away. Your fear is returning, crawling through your limbs and leaving you numb to everything. You shut your eyes, gripping the sheets, and whimper when he pushes himself inside you. He releases a ragged breath before moving, slow but with purpose, and you simply take it with soft whimpers and gasps as he pumps in and out of you, now starting to set a steady pace. His eyes, the blue completely gone from his them, soften for a moment and he kisses you tenderly before he whispers in your ear, his breath puffs against your skin. He spends a good amount of time on your neck, a brief stop at the base of your throatâhe wants to bite you, but he canâtâsomething melts inside Soldat that hurts in an exquisite wayâyou are not his. âWho did you marry, Snow White?â He asks, voice throbbing with menaceâbefore slipping inside you again and burying himself to the hilt. Sex with you this time is different, he has never felt this dominant, this claiming. He is so far in that his balls are right against your lips. You arch your back and moan âIt doesnât matterâ as he slides back out nearly all the way before slamming into you hard and fast. You wrap your legs around his waist as he slams into you over and over, the only sound in the room is the skin slapping. You close your eyes and swallow. Your mouth parts and stillsâyour voice is barely a whisper as his tip touches your cervix. âPierceâŚI am closer to ruining his plans, closer to freeing youâ Despite your eyelids being tightly shut, a single, hot tear runs out of your eye. You are so angry that it has escapedâso angryâhe stops his trusts completely. You moan as you feel his movement out of you. Then, as he almost has the tip fully out, he slaps it back in. When your eyes meet his gaze as you are sitting here staring at each other, time stops. Your fingertips reach to trace the metal shoulder, but he grasps your hand with his own. He leans down, far enough that the ends of his hair brush feather-light against your face, catching in your lashes and tears.
His breath, warm and measured, hits your cheek. Two breaths. Three. Then you stop breathing, and a second later, you feel his lips on your mouth. It is hungry, desperate. His metal hand wraps around your neck, thumb presses into the skinâyou moan, it ripples over your nerve endings. His breath caresses your ear againâhis grip on your neck tightens. And this makes you always still and submitâŚthe act of Winter taking shameful, contemptuous possession of you is the kind of rapture you want.
âNext time-â you try, but with your restricted of oxygen brain, you are not able to. He tastes passion. He tastes lust. He tastes his power over you. He tastes a world of stimulants heâd never imagined. You are right there in front of him, he can do whatever he wants. Winter loosens his holdâonly to observe you as you breathe raggedly, sliding down slowly, a moan ripping from your throat.Â
âNext time he calls you in his house, I will be there, tooâ
I have nothing to give but my heart so full and these empty hands.
âI need to kill them one by one, Winterâ His mouth curves into a smileâhis eyes are light blue and dancing with life. He pauses for only a fraction of a second. Then he leans forward and presses his lips to yours "Okay, yeah, yeah" a devil-soft whisper. He blinks several times like he is trying to comprehend your plan word by word. His trusts become so hormonalâyou want his roughness. His other hand slips to your waist, pushing you into the mattress as he fucks you. For him, sex intimately relates to the most primitive kind of human contact, which can satisfy all of his needs he has been deprived from. "Winter " you gaspe breathlessly "Slow down" You try to let out a choked squeal, but his metal hand tightens around your neck again, muffling any sounds, your toes curling as he brings you steadily closer and closer to orgasm, reeling from the thrill and the fear from both his forceful thrusts of his powerful hips and the choking. Soldat is unrelenting in his domination of your body. But you are his at this moment, your cunt clenching around him while you mewls and grunts fill his ears, he canât slow down even one bit. Logic would say that this is insane, every other fibre of his being says it's rightâhe has to fill you up. You can't move. You can't breathe. And his pace. And the adrenaline. âI will cum insideâdear Snow Whiteâ This is his demarcation line, all of a sudden it seems unfair to withhold it from you. Your inner muscles tighten as waves of pleasure start to build and ripple out. You donât normally get off this fast, but you are lost in the exquisite sensationsâyou put your hands on his metal arm as your body bursts into flames, your fingers curling into the metal. You canât make a sound and it is a shame, because it is the best orgasm you ever had. It is unbearable, unreal, unimaginableâit is too much as your eyes can only see darkness due to the choking. You can only hear a broken and hoarse cry escaping his lips, his warm come filling you up completely.
You can hear his breath, as your vision slowly becomes solidâa stray lock of dark hair falls into his eyes as he is looking downâhe moves his hips back and then into you again, enjoying his cock being in a tub of cum, swimming in your honey.
#I WAS POSSESSED#but this is real#metal arm kink fr#winter soldier x you#winter soldier smut#winter soldier imagine#winter soldier x reader#winter soldier fic#winter soldier fanfiction#smut#slight angst#bucky smut#bucky barnes smut#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#marvel x reader#bucky barnes imagine
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so like, do you ever think about the similarities between Gwaine and Will (from Ealdor)? And their respective friendship with Merlin? Because, dude, Iâve been thinking about it all week.
These two would've been friends, I'm sure of it.
Gwaine makes the most iconic character introduction of the series, gets stabbed, continues to be a menace, and then he and Merlin bond over their fathers, and lack thereof.
Gwaine is cynical about nobility, especially Kings. As we know, his father was a knight who died in battle in Carleonâs name, and the King repaid his family with nothing.
Then youâve got Will. Will - the most iconic man from Ealdor, which is a tall order when your mateâs Merlin, Mr âGreatest Sorcerer To Have Ever Walked The Earthâ who is also from Ealdor. He greets Merlin like âyour kind ainât welcome hereâŚ.. lol jk bring it inâ, and then immediately squares up with Arthur, whoâs kind - as far as Will is concerned - is definitely not welcome here.
Merlin reveals that Willâs issues with Arthur run deeper than how they first appear. Will, too, had a father that died in battle in service to, most likely, a King. The majority of it is inferred to the audience and weâre encouraged to make our own conclusions.
Itâs very likely that Will and Gwaine share very similar backgrounds. Iâm not sure that Willâs father was a knight, itâs more probable that he was a soldier of some kind and not of noble birth. Regardless of whatever rank he held, thereâs overlap: a father was in service to a king, died in service to that king, that king left the family with nothing as thanks, and the son is left a cynic with no trust for people with fancy titles.
Another parallel is that in both 1x10 and 3x04, Will and Gwaine leave. For different reasons, of course. Will leaves because he refuses to fight for Arthur, a noble, and Gwaine leaves because he stood up to ânoblesâ bullying Merlin and was banished by Uther for it.
And then they both come back, to Merlinâs delight. Will comes back, risking his life, because itâs not about fighting for Arthur; itâs about fighting for Ealdor, his village, and to fight beside Merlin. Gwaine comes back, risking the consequences of his banishment, because he knew Arthur was in danger and Merlin likely would need some help.
But like, do you think Merlin, after Willâs death and since meeting Gwaine, sees these similarities between his two friends? Not just in experiences but personality? We only got one episode with Will, and we met him during a really desperate time, so the guy was probably stressed to the roots of his hair; and it was also after Merlin returned after moving away. So, Will - though happy to see him - was still cross after feeling abandoned. We didnât get to see more of Willâs personality outside of that, but we know he was fiercely loyal, cynical, considered peopleâs lives worth more than material wealth or glory, outspoken and unafraid to tell a prince to fuck off, and one for banter (i.e. how he welcomed Merlin home).
Do you think Merlin saw Gwaineâs joking nature, his fierce loyalty, his criticisms of nobility and how he considered titles unimportant compared to who a person was on the inside, and thought of Will?
And, what if Merlin, late at night and lying in bed, thought that - if theyâd ever gotten the chance to meet - Gwaine and Will wouldâve been good friends.
âŚ. anyway, thatâs whatâs plagued me for 6 days.
#idk anyway have this *yeet*#bbc merlin#merlin#merlin meta#meta#will of ealdor#gwaine#sir gwaine#bbc gwaine#ren rambles#scheduled
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you should know better than to ask a lady her age (nezha x reader)
content warnings: female reader, second pov (you/your), reader is a goddess and has tamayo vibes, nezha is nezha just more feral, mild age gap (both are adults on their first meeting + reader appears in her late twenties and nezha between 24-25 > author has no idea what counts as early/late twenties), all fluff and wholesome stuff, swooning nezha, nezha bullies mk once and wukong multiple times (biggest nezha opp), li jing is his own warning tbh
author's notes: demon slayer x lmk crossover when?
Meeting you was a dream Nezha could never want to forget. It was one of his life's greatest mistakes, and yet for once in his life, it was one he held no regrets for. Not one bit, when the feelings he held for you were so pure and filled with nothing but the utmost passion. To him, you meant the world, and perhaps more.
âNezha, is it?â Soft hands run through his hair, undoing the messy braids he'd struggled to tie just this morning. âAn interesting name for a god like him.â
âDoes it matter?â Above him, his father crosses his arm. âCan you heal him, or not?â
The soft voice sighs melancholy. It reminds him of a lullaby, sung to him by a distant voice during a thunderstorm. The hands that thread through his hair still, and the warmth spreads through his body. Gentle fingers press into his scalp, massaging the tender skin.
Then, there is silence.
âThat's it?â Li Jing's bitter voice breaks the silence. âThat's all?â
âI must remind you, my lord, that this humble servant is not as powerful as her elders.â The hands in his hair gently rub a pattern. âAnd she has done her best for this lotus prince. All that remains now is for him to rest and allow his body to heal on its own.â
He feels fine, though. Whatever this stranger had done, his body has never felt more alive. It was opposite feeling he had felt before, when Taiyi had restored him.
His father âtsksâ angrily. âHe'll be fine. He's not some child to rest at every interval.â
He anticipates whoever the stranger is to agree with him.
âLi Jing. You are correct that this is no child, but he is, theoretically, your son. And unless you imply your wife has made you wear a green hat, there is nothing in this world that can change the shared blood you two will have even until death. Have some sympathy, won't you?â
Ah. This was a strange feeling, having someone stand up to that prick of a father he had. Something warm fills his chest at the thought.
It's only when a door slams shut that Nezha dares to open his eyes. A kind woman is looking down at him, with nothing but a smile on her lips.
âHello, Nezha.â You spoke his name so kindly, filled nothing but gentleness. âI'm glad you're awake. How are you feeling?â
A goddess. No, something else indeed.
Nezha had zero qualms dedicating his life's purpose to you. It's not like he had much to do anyway, and the Jade Emperor did not seem to mind his attachment to you so long as he did his duties. Li Jing complained often, and for all Nezha knew, most definitely still did, about this vulnerability he showed the goddess that healed him, but the Lotus Prince found that he did not give one fuck. Why should he care if his father had a stick up his ass about his relationship with the goddess that healed him? Lady (Name) held no complaints towards his presence, and thus, any other complaints from outsiders were ignored.
And you truly had nothing against Nezha's presence at your side. Since the day he had found himself lying on your lap, he seemed to hold some form of attachment and loyalty towards you. You put it off as his attempt at being grateful, even though you really didn't mind. Helping people was always one of the joys you held ever so dearly in your immortal life. Nezha really didn't need to express his gratefulnessâŚ
Though his company was nothing short of welcoming. The Lotus Prince, for all his grumpy attitude and sulky expressions, was a dear to be around, and you quite liked how his expression would always turn so adorably pink when you compliment his feats. One of your favorite pastimes with him was styling his hair, and tying colorful ribbons in them for the funs of it.
A few gods and immortals were surprised at the sight, but soon enough they learnt it was best not to ask. Less questions meant less injuries, since a certain prince did not like it when people swooned over your kindness.
You were pretty sure that was why so many patients senses a cold aura every visit, come to think of it. But maybe it was just your imagination and not the lotus prince glaring from the window.
Speaking of which, how did he managed to climb so high??
âSun Wukong, is it?â You thanked Nezha for the tray that he offered you, your favorite blend of teaâa gift from Nezha's older brother, Jinzhaâalready made and poured into the fancy porcelain cups you favored so much. The tray was set down on the small table between yourself and your guests, and you offered a cup to each. âAnd your loyal protege, MK?â
The boy wearing the red bandanna nodded quickly, a noticeable blush on his cheeks. You put it off as excitement, since the moment he'd entered the celestial realm, he'd been gushing about the beauty of the place, top to bottom and back again. His mentor wasn't half as excited, grabbing him by the collar to stop him from running off to who knows where while he sipped on a cup.Â
âI'm surprised you haven't heard of me,â Sun Wukong remarked, raising a brow at you. âYou a new god or something?â When you nodded in confirmation, he blinked. âAh, that explains it. Pretty sure I would've recognized a pretty face like yours.â
Next to you, Nezha's aura radiated annoyance. Maybe it was just your imagination, but you swore you could feel the god and monkey exchanging heated glares.
Weird.
âYou flatter this servant too much,â you answered humbly and smiled. âBut it is true that this is the first time I've even heard of you, Sun Wukong.â
âAh? How old even are you?â MK questioned curiously.
â25 when she first achieved enlightenment. 457 years in mortal terms.â This time, Nezha was the one who spoke. You flashed him a grateful smileâbecause sadly, you truly kept no track of these things, not when it felt so pointlessâbut Wukong exchanged a weird look with his protege, especially when Nezha gave him a stink eye. âAnd you should know better than to ask a lady her age. It's disrespectful.â
âDon't be mean, he meant no harmââ You chided Nezha, gently patting his face. He leaned into your touch with a pleasant smile, and you shook your head at the sweet gesture. âAnd yes, I've lived long, but not as long as the Prince or Sun Wukong has. I'm afraid there are still many things I am duly unaware of.â
Sun Wukong snickered. âSome more than others, aye, Nezha?â
In response, a golden brick was thrown at the monkey's face. It hit him square on the face, and you gasped as Sun Wukong fell over, holding his face painfully.Â
âNezha!â You scolded the lotus prince and gather your robes to stand and examine the fallen Sage. Aside from the red spot on his forehead, he seemed fine, but still whined about the pain he was in. You glanced at Nezha's pouting expression. âThat was not very polite! Don't do that again, understood?â
Nezha relented. âYes, Lady (Name).â Even when angry she's still as beautiful as the morning sun.
Sun Wukong peeked an eye open. He caught the Lotus Prince's gaze from his position on your lap, and while you focused on soothing his pain, he winked.
Let's just say all hell broke loose after that, and Nezha and Sun Wukong owed you a new palace.
âNyahaha.â
âFuck you you stupid fucking cock slobbing whore!â
âNezha!â
âSorry, Lady (Name).â
â:3â
@lotusarchon , 23.09.2024, all rights reserved. do not copy, repost or translate my works without permission. comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated!
#đŻđusagii's penpalsđ#lego monkie kid#monkie kid#lmk#female reader#lego monkie kid x reader#monkie kid x reader#lmk x reader#lego monkie kid x y/n#monkie kid x y/n#lmk x y/n#lmk nezha#third lotus prince nezha#nezha lmk#monkie kid nezha#nezha x reader#nezha x y/n#lmk nezha x reader#lmk nezha x y/n#monkie kid nezha x reader#monkie kid nezha x y/n#lotus prince nezha#third lotus prince#mentioned !!!#lmk sun wukong#lmk mk#tamayo#yushiro#demon slayer
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This is the last time Iâm gonna talk about this topic, mostly because itâs hiatus era and I would like to be able to write fics without outrightly bashing s2 Alicent, but I do think it needs to be said.
Thereâs nothing defendable in what Alicent did when she gave up her entire family on a silver platter for Rhaenyra.
So many takes about how weâthe ones who found that scene abominable and abhorrentâmisread the scene, or purposefully misinterpreted just to hate her; that what Alicent did was a good thing because it would have spared her entire family if only she let Aegon die. Giving up Criston and Gwayneâs location to be slaughtered (in what is most likely going to be Butcherâs Ball) wasnât the intention; Alicent would never do that to her family and this was the only way to ensure survival en yada yada yada.
Yet the only person she said anything about saving was Helaena and Jaehaera, the latter of which is still continued to be dehumanized by no one referring to her as anything but âchildâ. Alicent put no thought towards Daeronâher innocent 16 year old son, who has done nothingâwho was now joining a war that she started by declaring his brother king. Daeron, whoâs flying alongside the Hightower army, in a war that will not end just because the Dowager Queen decided enough was enough. Who might die, and actually will die, before he ever sees his family again.
And even if she believes Rhaenyra executing Aegon would end the war (which it wonât), what made s2 Alicent think that the deaths would stop there?
A son for a son? Rhaenyra didnât even remember that Jaehaerys had already been murdered for Luke. What made Alicent think that Rhaenyra would spare fucking Aemond of all people??? Aemond, who killed Luke and Rhaenys, whoâs now Prince Regent because Aegonâs heir is dead? Who rides Vhagar, and would rather burn the world down than cleave to Rhaenyra? Whoâs committed the majority of the crimes that make up Team Green? No, Aemond will have to die.
Daeron will have to die.
Jaehaerys, had he lived, would have to die anyway.
Maelor if he existed too.
Otto, Criston, Gwayneâall dead by virtue of being active participants and commanders in TG.
The only way Rhaenyra can claim that throne and ensure she can hold it is by eliminating the rival claimants, down to the youngest son.
That was something s1 Alicent knew, had raised her son on the belief they would die if their sister ascended, before the writers butchered her to a million pieces and left a caricature in her place. The claims go down son to son before it reaches daughters, which meant killing Aegon wouldnât stop Rhaenyraâs troubles. Sheâd have to go after his sons and brothers too before the throne is legally hers.
There is no version of this story, where war has already started and a king crowned, that would end with little bloodshed beyond the death of said king.
In a different world, an argument could be made to spare some of them. If Rhaenyra had ascended untouched, then perhaps deals couldâve been made. Aegon would still have to die, Iâd imagine. Take the Black at minimum, with Jaehaerys following in his footsteps as an adult or perhaps the Citadel. As long as Aegonâs line persisted, there would always be a chance of rebellion happening once Jace becomes king. So that whole line would have to be removed.
Aemond and Daeron would be less dangerous, but there would be little chance theyâd be spared. The Black for Aemond, because I canât see him agreeing to be a Kingsguard. Daeron would go to the Citadel without question. Jaehaera would either be married into the main line via Aegon III like in canon, or Rhaenyra would arrange for her to marry Jace to solidify his claim. Heâd have a better claim through Jaehaera than Baela, after all.
And even then, that was still best case scenario. Worst case theyâre all executed to protect Jace. Because Rhaenyraâs reign might somehow be mediocre and peaceful (really she has no makings of a great queen), but Jaceâs will be a landmine. Between two legitimate brothers and no sisters to marry them to and trueborn cousins and uncles, Jaceâs ascension was going to be a massive clusterfuck that would make the Dance look like a play.
#hotd#anti hotd#hotd critical#anti alicent hightower#hotd alicent critical#anti rhaenyra targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen critical#aegon ii targaryen#aemond targaryen#daeron targaryen#team green
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Hajime x tooru's twin sister!reader who is bold president of a science club in school headcanons?
OOOOH this is a MUST
Miss the old haikyuu 2020 days fr. And man is this my best work yet trustđ
Hajime Iwaizumi x Fem!Reader(Tooru's twin)
Rs: Hajime Iwaizumi x Fem!Reader (Tooru's twin sister)
Warnings: ANGST, a little bit of bullying, awkward talks of teenage sex, sexual depictions, suggested themes, nsfw(lasts for a sentence or two), disorder mentioned, implied death
Tags: sad.. Bittersweet, fluff, hajime is so cute, hajime acts soft around reader, childhood friends to lovers, high school sweethearts, old age, marriage, a little smut
Recommended song: (play by the end)
wc: 1.5k
a/n: this made me feel nostalgic and pretty sad to write imo.
How you met/first impressions:
You met each other through your brother, Tooru. Tooru was snarky and keen on keeping his best friend to himself but you were even more petty. When Tooru was distracted on trying to set a ball, you would quickly grab Hajime by the wrist and drag him to your hiding place. Occasionally, it would change because your brother would somehow find it.. always.
To Hajime, you had to be one of the prettiest girls he's ever seen in all of his six years of living. You.. also became his first heartbreak. He proposed to you with a ring pop and you refused. "Pee-yew! I don't wanna marry you, Iwa!" He was left super dejected and sulked until Tooru was forced to distract him to get his mind off things. Ever since then, he was always teasing you and making smart ass remarks at you.
He was a odd boy. What made you like and wanna hang around him like Tooru does was that Hajime was adventurous. He seemed strong too. And you wanted two boys to look up to anyways to treat you like queen so you tried your best to boss both Tooru and Hajime around. You entirely started to acknowledge Hajime when he comforted you after Tooru hit you in the head with a volleyball.
How you start to like each other:
Hajime has always liked you since you were little kids. Obviously. But he made sure it wasn't obvious to you or that you were merely someone he stole answers from for science class. Someone who was just his best friend's twin sister. It wasn't like he was gonna stay like this forever... He just didn't know how to approach you. And he has his doubts. He's basically like Paxton Hall Yoshida only that he didn't sleep around and he wasn't that dumb... He just sucked at science. So he goes to you but he makes fun of you for it.
You realize when some random jock drops all the books in your hands on purpose, laughing and high-fiving with his friends. "stupid- STUPID SHITFACE!" Your shout literally reaches everyone's ears. Including Hajime's.
For some reason, the jock gets offended and goes up to you, chest to chest. Except his chest was much larger and higher than yours. "The fuck d'you say?" You nearly recoil when you feel his hot breath hit your face. "I said-" "betta' keep that mouth shut, sweetheart," he cuts you off immediately, wincing when he shoves you against the lockers. People are already crowding and pulling out their phones. Great. But before anything else happens, the jock is roughly jerked back and lands on his butt. And there stands your prince Charming, Hajime Iwaizumi. You notice that his ears are red. Steams were also practically steaming out of his ears. He stomps his way over to the jock that stood up with a small stutter. "Better keep that mouth shut, hm?" Hajime stares the jock down. Clearly, the boy wasn't going to back down so he scoffs, rolling his sleeves up. The jock's eyes quickly widen and murmur a 'my bad ' and takes his leave along with his friends, a few applauses and cat calls being earned from the crowd.
"You okay?" Hajime barely grasps your fingertips in his, looking at you with concern. Your heart was quite literally about to explode over what just occurred.
How you confess:
The tension was awfully SO obvious.. Matsukawa was frantically complaining about the faint flirting and playful teases. But neither you or Hajime did or said nothing. Matsukawa basically face plants at that but he sorts out a plan with Hanamaki and Tooru. Tooru was almost against it but he did have to admit, he literally knew everything about how the two of you felt. And it was painful to watch you and Hajime, it cringed him out LIKE JUST GET TOGETHER ALREADY!!
Tooru had sent you a text that he was already home. So it was just you and Hajime. You both left the school in silence. Started walking in silence. Entering your neighborhood in silence. Before you thought another moment was gonna be filled in silence, he tugs you by the wrist. He confesses and pours out everything he knows and feels about you. How long, when, where, etc. You confess too, a smile adorning your face when he looks away all flustered. You kissed him on the cheek before you went in your house, leaving him alone with a hand on his cheek and a slack jaw.
How you get together:
He was waiting for you outside the door after your club meeting ended. He seemed nervous but you knew what he was trying to get at. So you simply do the job for him. "Wanna be my boyfriend?" He gives you that signature head scratching smile, giving you a nod. You both walk home together that late afternoon, holding hands the whole way.
How you kiss:
They're very sweet and slow. Hajime respects you enough to not over step your boundaries unless you ask of him. He gets very wary when you do. "Are you sure? Are you reaallly sure? I don't know.. Suure? Okay, okay- fine, c'mere."
Sometimes things get heated. The way his tongue glides over yours seems like they almost suggest something. You would smirk against his lips and push yourself on top of him to get him flustered on purpose. Or you would... at least try to pin him against a wall. "(Y-Y/N).. We- we can't yet.. not yet.." This would get you very pouty but he kisses you through it and holds you so you don't catch a fit.
What he loves about you (Adults) :
He loves that you stayed through all this time. He's known you about twenty one years and you both have dated each other for nine years. Obviously when it becomes your tenth anniversary, he's gonna propose.. He just doesn't know how... And he seriously did not mean to wait that long..
He loves to kiss your pulses and your eyelids. He thinks those are really intimate to do and he just really loves that you're alive and breathing.
He loves when wrinkles start to spawn whenever you concentrate. It makes him think he'll grow old with you.
When you're married: he loves it when you cling onto him for life on your honeymoon, screaming his name when you're bouncing on his shaft. 'Give me your babies' you chant. It makes him giggle at the thought.
Awkward discussion with your kids:
One of your kids get a unusual.. and awfully weird offer. Luckily, they came to you both about it for advice and for curiosity. "Why do people have sex?"
Honestly, it was like you were ready for this question but you were unprepared. You knew how high school could be very.. Ratchet. Especially with all the drama, sex, hormones... You were sure things were worse for their generation. But you thoroughly explain and answer with all you can to your child's questions, trying not to cringe halfway.
Your husband was NOT prepared at all. He wasn't ready. He wasn't even really expecting this conversation until LATER. man, he thinks. 'Their generation would really bring us all down.' He stays and tries to answer though.. It's mainly just you talking and you seem completely fine and cool with it which he doesn't understand at all.
After an argument:
Usually, a child sulks and becomes completely depressed when their parents fight but oh no, not your child. Your child absolutely loves to step in between you and Hajime's arguments. Your child was basically the anchor, almost. Keeping you two steady.
Hajime would realize his mistakes and so would you. So you both make up to each other and show each other your love, hugging each other and never letting go, falling asleep in each other's arms once you do.
Who gets Dementia?
You, you do.
It's a sad thing, really. Old age was really hitting you both, you especially. It saddened you both but you both knew it would be okay all as long he was next to you and you were next to him.
It would hurt Hajime whenever you would forget his name and slowly how he looks like. But he never gave up, nor did he ever pressure you into trying to figure out who he was. That's also how you knew that man was someone you loved. Every time you would remember though, everything suddenly became waterworks. You would cry about being young again and experiencing so many things with each other without a problem in the world.
Last moments?
"Hajime?" You murmur, reaching out for his wrinkled hand. He turns to look at you, eyes glossy and sullen looking because of his droopy skin. He rubs his thumb across your hand, kissing your knuckles. "You're beautiful."
You smile warmly, closing your eyes just as you tell him so, "take me to the moon."
Fun Fact:
As young adults, Hajime was suffering without you in California. He immediately made sure you never left his sight when he went back to Japan.
At the ages of 6, Hajime had nursed your scraped knee. When he gave you a Disney Princess band-aid, you kissed his cheek politely and he happily accepted it.
#anime#fiction#fanfic#fantasy#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#angst#lovers#haikyuu scenarios#haikyuu fandom#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#haikyu x reader#haikyuu angst#haikyĹŤ!!#iwaizumi x reader#iwaizumi hajime#hajime iwaizumi#hajime iwaizumi x reader#fem reader#hajime x reader#iwaizumi x you#haikyuu!! angst#haikyuu!! fluff#bittersweet#haikyuu iwaizumi#hq iwaizumi#iwaizumi fluff#haikyuu smut
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i just finished the dragon princeâs season 6. holy shit.
SPOILERS BELOW!!!!
-AARAVOS IS MY NEW FAVORITE CHARACTER HOLY SHIT I LOVE A MORALLY GRAY MAN WHO WOULD BURN DOWN THE WORLD FOR THE ONE PERSON HE LOVES
-ohhh my god me and my friends were SOBBING over his daughterâs death oh my god!!!! what the fuck thats so sad. and him crying for A HUNDRED years is so fucking sad oh my god please
-viren redemption arc??? man he has to stop coming back to life. i think hes finally dead this time but holy shit it took six seasons
-TERRY ILY YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE WAITED FOR HER OMG (like ily claudia youre hot asf but you need a redemption arc before you deserve terry)
-speaking of terry that scene where he ever so gently bathed her had me rolling over crying he is the sweetest man to ever exist
-IF SOREN AND CORVUS DO NOT KISS ASAP IM LITERALLY EATING A MY TV YOU CAN HOLD ME TO THIS
-lesbian wedding!!!
-rayllum finally kissed đ¤đ¤ its only been sIX DAMN SEASONS OF TENSION
-yeah im still thinking about aaravos i love me a morally gray man and hes hot asf
-ezran is so young bro hes like 12-14 here im so mad he grew up so quickly hes gonna have so much trauma
-the ending with callum spotting his kingdom burning in the distance??? please đ¤
-SPEAKING OF MEN i forgot how *HOT* runaan is like sirrrr đ¤đ¤ (i cant be saying this heâs old enough to he my actual father)
anyway i have to go rewatch the whole damn thing because my brother wants to watch it with me so ill be sobbing over fictional characters if you need me!! <3
#the dragon prince#netflix#tv series#season 6#mystery of aaravos#aaravos#tdp s6 spoilers#callum#tdp spoilers#rayla#tdp season 6#tdp viren#tdp s6#tdp speculation#tdp callum#tdp rayla#tdp#corvus#sorvus#tdp soren#rayllum
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R and myself were talking recently about kids books, since little Baby U is starting to show an interest in books and reading, and I said I had some book recommendations because I started reading extremely young (around 18 months) and my parents, not knowing what to do with me, gave me weird fucked up books like Zag to read, and I loved them.
"what do you think of A Little Prince?" he asked.
"I'm not super objective about that one -- "
"Oh, do you love it too?"
"Ah...no, it's just below The Velveteen Rabbit in my list of children's books I truly hate."
"You hate The Velveteen Rabbit?!"
Someday I'm going to unpack exactly why I hate those two books in particular while being indifferent to books like The Giving Tree (I mostly was just sad that the end of the book involves confronting our inevitable aging and death, but not distraught the way a lot of kids apparently are about the poor tree). I can remember plodding through the endless twee prose of A Little Prince, with its tiny nightmare world and off-putting protagonists, and thinking the four year old equivalent of "who does this motherfucker think he is?" whenever the repeated cant of how horrible and unimaginative adults are came up yet again. But because I hated it so much as a small child I can't read it objectively, I'm just looking for new things to be mad about.
Ditto The Velveteen Rabbit, although my initial reaction to that one was mostly "This is a story about a boy whose only comfort object was taken from him and BURNED IN A PYRE after a traumatizing illness" so it's a little less esoteric. (Yes I know the bunny wasn't burned, but he doesn't.)
Anyway I'm not saying I'm an ideal grownup to be like but if you do want your kids to grow up with this particular flavor of weirdness, give your tiny readers Robert Tallon picture books and Jack Prelutsky poetry books and The Ox Cart Man and Three Days On A River In A Red Canoe. And Panda Cake if you can get your hands on a copy.
Maybe not the Babar books. They're beautiful and weird but the colonialism has not held up well.
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Or: Prince Roier Hires a Faerie to Help With His Divorce (he hasn't gotten married yet)
For day two of @smallchaoscryptid's Spiderbit Week - Fae/Kiss
-
Once upon a time...
Roier picks his way through the foliage with a grimace. His feet hurt, twigs keep smacking into his face, bugs keep flying into his mouth. This sucks, but it'll all be worth it.
Thunder rolls above, and rain starts pouring down without a second's warning.
...It'll all be worth it.
He's due back at the castle by morning, but, honestly, he'd kinda rather die than go back. If the wolves eat him, so be it!
Grumbling, he pulls his hood up over his head, and he continues onward. If he freezes to death out here, so be it!
He's not planning on going back to the castle alive, anyway.
Legend has it that, deep in the haunted forest surrounding the Kingdom of Quesadilla, there lives a man-eating witch capable of tearing a man's soul from his body before he can so much as breathe in her general direction. Nobody knows this witch's name, but everybody knows that she's totally fucked up: if she isn't eating people, she's eating bears, and her magic is said to be as destructive as the eruption that created the universe.
Roier needs to meet her now.
So he continues trudging through the woods. The lantern in his hand is fighting to stay lit, and his boots are filled with enough water to drown a rat with, but he's fine. He's going to die miserable, but he's fine.
There's a flash of lightning bright enough to blind him, and then there's a crash of thunder loud enough to make him jump and nearly drop his lantern. When his vision returns, the tree in front of him is toppled to the side, leaving only a charred and smoking stump behind.
And then there's the cat.
Roier, frankly, stares. Because... what?
It's a cute cat, at least: brown with black stripes almost like a tiger's and blue eyes so bright that they almost seem to glow in the night. It sits on the stump with its tail curled around its paws, very polite, 10/10 cat.
Hesitantly, Roier approaches. He holds the lantern up to the cat, tilts his head, smiles.
"You're so cute," he coos, bending down to pet the cat between its little ears. "What are you doing out here, eh?"
The cat yawns, and then it huffs, "I could ask you the same question."
Roier screams and recoils and drops his lantern. It goes out, but the forest doesn't grow any dimmer because the cat is fucking glowing now, okay. Okay!
The cat rolls its eyes, tail twitching. "Okay, ouch. I'm not that scary."
"You're a talking cat," Roier breathes. "What the fuck?"
"What, you were expecting the witch?"
A pause.
Then:
"Oh, come on!"
Roier finally collects himself, brushing the water off of his cloak and adjusting his hood and picking up his lantern.
The cat stands and starts pacing the stump in a small, annoyed circle.
"The witch isn't even real," it complains. "She never was! Witches aren't real!"
Roier frowns. "Fuck you, man, my best friend is a witch."
"They aren't. Witches aren't real. Magicians are real, but witches-"
"You are literally a talking cat."
"I am a faerie," the cat corrects, sounding almost pained as it does so. "Faeries are real. Witches are fake. It's all anti-faerie propaganda created by the Federation-"
"By the what?"
The cat flicks his tail at Roier; Roier's mouth shuts, and, to his alarm, he finds that he can't open it again no matter how hard he tries.
The cat angrily swipes a leaf off of the stump. Unfortunately, it is really cute as it does so.
But then it starts complaining again, and Roier decides that this annoying fucking faerie cat isn't that cute after all.
"I haven't eaten anybody in centuries!" the cat shouts. "Fucking Cucurucho..."
Roier's eyes widen.
He waves at the cat until the cat does its magic thing again and allows him to talk.
First, Roier sucks in a deep breath through his mouth. That was uncomfortable.
Then, he says, "I know Cucurucho. I'm supposed to marry him in three days."
The cat's eyes narrow. Its shadow beneath it seems to grow; it tinges itself red like a pool of water with blood in it, wow. That's almost cool.
"That's why I'm here," Roier explains. "I need the witch to kill me so I don't have to marry him."
The cat sits.
"I see," it says. "Unfortunately, the witch isn't real."
"Suuuure, but you are." Roier sneaks closer. "Can't you just-" He opens his hands and wiggles his fingers. "-magic me dead?"
The cat stares at Roier's fingers. "Um. No. Faeries can't kill."
Roier deflates. "Ugh."
With a frustrated groan, he sits on the stump next to the cat. The cat grumbles, but it doesn't, like, magic him onto the ground, so that's kinda nice of it.
"But," the cat says, slowly as if questioning itself as it speaks, "I can get you to kill for me."
Oh. Now there's a thought. But...
Roier looks to the side at the cat. "I've tried. I'm pretty sure he's immortal, man."
"You haven't tried killing him with faerie magic. Now, come here."
The cat hops off of the stump and pads into the forest. After a moment, Roier follows.
They walk until they reach a hollowed-out tree. Then, the cat hops into the tree and mutters to itself as it looks for something.
Eventually, the cat pokes its head out of the tree with an opaque brown bottle held in its mouth.
Roier takes the bottle and turns it over in his hands.
"This," the cat says, "is extract of unicorn. Mix this in with Cucurucho's food, and he'll be dead by the end of the night."
Roier's mouth twitches. It'll happen, just like that? Just like that? Decades of oppression over just. Like. That?
"Okaaayyy," Roier drawls. He looks back up at the cat with a small smile. "Thank you."
The cat responds by clambering out of the tree and lounging on a branch hanging by Roier's face.
"No, thank you," the cat insists. "You'll be doing us both a favor if you manage to kill that asshole."
"If this kills him, you'll be a hero."
"Oh, I'm no hero. I'm just..." (The cat grins with far too many teeth in its mouth.) "...an invested party."
Well, the cat is probably evil. But that's fine. So is Cucurucho, and two wrongs make a right, right?
-
Well, wrong! Because Cucurucho isn't fucking dead.
Roier stomps back to the tree stump with the faerie's empty unicorn piss whatever bottle in hand. He doesn't have a lantern this time because, frankly, he really isn't intent on returning to the castle this time. If he trips over a root and dies, so be it!
The cat is nowhere to be seen. Of course, the bastard.
"Gatinho!" Roier calls. He cups both hands around his mouth and spins in a circle and continues shouting, "Gatinho! Where the fuck are you! Come here!"
No response.
Frustrated, Roier chucks the bottle to the ground and plops onto the stump. He puts his head in his hands and groans.
"I am going to fucking die," he moans. "I can't go home, I need to die, what the fuck."
A twig snaps. A presence ghosts over his shoulder, what feels like fingers grazing his tunic. But, when he snaps his head up and turns around, all he sees is the cat sitting behind him.
Roier's eyes narrow. "You."
"Me," the cat agrees. "Did it work? Is he dead? Please tell me he's dead. He's dead, right?"
"No! He isn't! He thought that unicorn shit was edible glitter! Now he wants it at the wedding!"
The cat blinks. "Huh."
"Yeah, 'huh'." Roier huffs and turns back around and hides his face again. "Fuck you, man. You said it would kill him."
"It should've. He's a demon, right?"
"How should I know? He's a fucking bear wizard thing."
"Okay, again, wizards aren't real, magicians are. But you're marrying him, right? How do you not know what species he is?"
"It's not like I'm getting a choice in the matter," Roier spits. He glares into the palms of his hands, shoulders shaking with barely-concealed rage. "Either I marry him or he destroys the kingdom."
There's a pregnant pause as the cat takes this information in. Fair, honestly. Roier hadn't exactly told him that he's a prince. Wasn't important, still isn't important. Doesn't matter if he's a prince if he's being sold off to marry a goddamn bear like he's a common animal.
It's for the good of the kingdom, Foolish had said. He and Vegetta have always liked Cucurucho despite Cucurucho being a legendary fucking creep. It's either you or Leo.
And Roier isn't the one that's meant to take the throne after his parents die.
"Can't you just kill me?" Roier asks. He waves a hand in a random direction. "Just make a tree fall on me or something. It'll be an accident, it's fine, your faerie cops won't know."
"Um, no," the cat says. "That's fucked up."
"Don't you eat people? How the fuck do you eat people without killing them?"
"Who says I killed them before eating them?"
Ah. Sounds about right.
...Kinda cool, to be honest. Imagining a tiny little kitty cat rip a grown dude apart like he's a slice of bread. Almost funny in a way.
Roier jumps as something brushes the hair out of his face.
He jerks his head upright and glares down at the cat, now sitting delicately in front of him.
"I have an idea," the cat tells him. "Follow me."
As they walk back to the hollow tree, the cat asks, "Does Cucurucho still have that freaky mechanical sword?"
Roier thinks. "Maybe? I don't know, he kinda just sits and stares at people. Sometimes he chases the servants around with a sword? Dunno if it's mechanical, though..."
"Well, any sword will work. Hold on."
The cat leaps into the tree and comes out with a new bottle, this one clear.
Roier takes the bottle and swishes it around. The liquid inside looks like oil, okay...
"This is dragon's blood," the cat explains. "It's corrosive to the touch, so be careful. Tell him that it's a special polish for his sword. It should eat his skin to the bone and kill him dead."
"Huh," Roier says, suddenly much more careful with the bottle. He gently slides it into his pocket, makes sure it's secure between a bag of coins and his headband. "Okay. Cool."
"This should work," the cat says. "But I'll try and think of something else for if it doesn't."
"Yeah, well, it'd better work," Roier huffs. "I'm getting married in two days. Then the gods only know what he's gonna do with me."
"Trust me, we'll figure it out."
"Trust you? Aren't you some kind of evil faerie cat?"
The cat looks offended. "Excuse you, I'm barely evil anymore. All I do is read these days. Do you know how many books I have at my house? More than Cucurucho, that's for sure."
"You have a house?"
The cat visibly bristles. "Of course I have a house. What, do you think I'm homeless?"
"You are a cat."
"Not all the time!"
Oh, that's interesting. Roier can almost imagine what the cat looks like in a human form, but the idea escapes him at the last second.
"Whatever," Roier sighs. "Just kill me tomorrow if this doesn't work."
-
Roier doesn't even bother shouting as he storms up to the stump.
He sits, pulls his cloak off, tosses it to his feet, kicks it away. What the fuck!!
He doesn't so much as blink as the cat appears by his side.
"It didn't work?" the cat cries. "Really? That should've worked!"
"Yeah, well, it didn't," Roier huffs. "He wore gloves today. And Cucurucho figured out that I've been sneaking out to see someone at night, so he told my parents that we're going to move to a different castle out in the middle of nowhere. I bet he's going to lock me up, the piece of shit."
The cat's ears lay back on its head. Its eyes narrow, and its lip curls back in a clear snarl.
"I know," Roier agrees. "Fuck this guy for real."
"Fuck him."
"Fuck him!"
Roier smiles just for a second, and he even manages a brief laugh before remembering, right. He's fucking doomed. Right.
Sighing, he slumps to the side until he's tumbling off of the stump and splayed across the ground. He buries his face in the grass and screams.
To his credit, he hardly jumps as a hand firmly settles on his back and rubs it. Small circles, firm hand, big hand, it feels like, wow.
Something- a knee?- presses against Roier's arm firmly. It's grounding in a way. Almost.
"I'm getting married tomorrow," Roier whines. "Just kill me, gatinho. I promise I won't tell anyone."
"I'm not going to kill you, guapito," the cat says. (Roier blushes. Guapito...) Its voice sounds deeper, almost. Louder. More clear. "I can't."
"Then what am I supposed to do? Marry Cucurucho?"
"I won't let that happen."
"Why? Because you want to kill him? Because that hasn't exactly been working so far."
"Because it's super fucked up that he's forcing you to marry him. I don't give a shit about the kingdom, I don't live there. I want him dead, but I'm starting to think that he's unkillable."
The hand moves from Roier's back up to his head. Fingers sift through his hair. Woooow, that feels good. When's the last time Roier got touched this softly? Before Cucurucho arrived?
"I've been thinking," the cat continues. "I've been keeping an eye on Cucurucho for centuries, but he's never tried destroying the kingdom before now. Before you. I think that, if you're gone, then he might leave, too."
Roier cracks an eye open. He doesn't shift his head at all, so he can only just barely make out a hint of cloth. So the cat has clothes when he's a human, that's cool, Roier guesses. Makes him wonder where they came from.
"So... kill me," Roier tells him. "If it'll get him to leave the kingdom alone, kill me."
"I can't do that."
"I'm not next in line for the throne! It's fine! Just push me into the river, I can't swim."
"You can't swim? Really?"
"Well, I can, but I can pretend that I can't!"
"You are so... selfless," the cat says, sounding completely exasperated. "And stupid. No, come with me. I know how we can solve this without killing you."
The hand leaves Roier's head, and then a cold nose is poking at his cheek until he's sitting up and looking the cat right in its little kitty eyes.
"Do you still have cat eyes when you're in another form?" Roier can't help but ask. "That would be really cool."
The cat chuckles. "Maybe. Come on. I have one last thing we can try."
They go to the hollow tree, and Roier waits as the cat scrambles into the tree and surfaces with a necklace clutched in its teeth.
Roier takes the necklace and inspects it. It's a solid gold chain with a little charm that looks like a cat's head. Cute.
"What, is this evil faerie gold that will melt Cucurucho's skin off?" Roier asks.
"No, it's for you," the cat replies. "Wear it tomorrow. When the wedding reaches the climax, take the necklace off and break it."
Roier points at the cat accusingly. "You are going to kill me!"
The cat rolls its eyes. "I'm not. Just... trust me."
Trust the man-eating faerie cat, sure. Right.
Roier sighs, but he puts the necklace on, anyway. It's surprisingly warm around his neck.
The cat almost seems to smile. "You look lovely."
"This thing is going to explode and blow my head off."
"No, you'll see."
And, well. What choice does Roier have but to wait and see?
-
The final wedding preparations go by in an uncomfortable blur.
Leo comes in to hug Roier goodbye. She then punches Roier in the stomach and tells him to write to her once he's at his new house.
Jaiden comes in to help Roier finish getting ready. She's happy about the marriage because she really thinks that Cucurucho is a good person, and Roier can't help but be happy that she's happy.
Foolish comes in to walk Roierto the church. He and Vegetta each take one of Roier's arms, and they walk.
And then Cucurucho is waiting at the church in front of the altar in an all-white suit. His fur is meticulously brushed, his claws are polished, his smile is painted on, he's absolutely grotesque.
Roier hates him.
"Good morning," Cucurucho says as Roier settles in front of the altar.
"It's sunset, you fucking idiot," Roier snaps. He can say what he wants now, right? He's going to die, anyway. The cat is going to kill him.
Cucurucho laughs, and then the ceremony starts.
Roier tunes out most of the goings-on if only to keep himself from breaking down and breaking the necklace before it's time. The cat said to wait until the climax, so Roier's going to wait for the goddamn climax.
He comes back to himself as the cleric asks if anybody in the audience has any objections to the marriage.
This sounds like a fucking climax if Roier's ever heard one.
"Yes," he says. "I object!"
He tears the necklace from around his neck and throws it to the floor. Before anybody can stop him, he slams his heel into the charm.
The entire church erupts into screams as a blinding white light fills it. Magic tears at Roier's skin, biting and pulling. He squeezes his eyes shut, anticipating the end of it all.
But:
"I also object," the cat says.
Two large hands settle on Roier's upper arms, and he's pulled back and against a firm chest.
Roier tilts his head back- not too far, because the cat's human form is shorter than he is, funnily enough- and his eyes widen as he takes in the most beautiful man in the world. Long hair the same color as the cat's coat, scarred face, feathery earrings, cat eyes.
"No," Curucucho snaps. "No!"
"Yes!" the cat- well, not the cat, Roier supposes- shouts. "The prince is mine! He swore himself to me the moment he accepted that necklace, and so he will go back with me to the Faewild and become my husband. You know the rules, bear."
Leo, in the audience, cheers. So does Foolish, who always appreciates a good show.
"Gatinho," Roier hisses.
The faerie shrugs his concerns off. Roier is annoyed about this for exactly three seconds before he gets caught up in the faerie's eyes.
Could be a worse arranged marriage, that's for sure...
A long moment passes, but Cucurucho eventually says a begrudging, "Yes."
"So," the faerie continues, "you will not destroy the kingdom for this. If the prince has already been promised to somebody else, then he never rejected you."
"Yes," Cucurucho sighs.
"You're hot when you're arguing," Roier whispers.
The faerie's cheeks redden, as do the tips of his pointed ears. Cute!
Yeah, no, this arranged marriage will be way better than the last one.
"So!" The faerie turns Roier around so that they're looking at each other properly for the first time eye-to-eye. "You will be coming with me."
"Yeah, okay," Roier agrees. Hell yeah. "Take me, gatinho."
"'Take me'?" Foolish gasps. "Ooooo, this is getting spicy!"
"All you need to do is say my name," the faerie says.
He leans in close and whispers right into Roier's ear, and Roier returns the favor... with a couple of flirtatious remarks thrown in for good measure. Sue him, he's about to get married to a sexy faerie. He's going to make the most of the situation.
"Cellbit," Roier murmurs, and something tickles at his skin. Something... purple. It feels purple. Soft and purple.
"Roier," the faerie replies. He looks positively flustered, aww. He's going to be so fun to tease once they're out of the church.
As the Faewild's magic starts to pick up, Roier can't help but give the faerie a grateful kiss.
The faerie blinks away from the kiss after a moment of some very eager lip-chasing. His face is completely red, and his eyes are wide and unblinking even as the magic around them whips like the wind.
"There's more where that comes from," Roier teases. He puts his arms around the faerie and smiles. "You're marrying me, get used to it. That's just part of the deal."
Because faeries are all about deals, right? Well, Roier's the best deal this guys is ever gonna get.
The faerie swallows, an eager grin teasing at his face.
"Yeah," he breathes. "Alright."
He pulls Roier's head down for another kiss just as the Faewild swallows them whole.
-
(Legends say that there are monsters living in the haunted forest surrounding the Kingdom of Quesadilla. Once monster is a man-spider with glowing red eyes and fangs the length of one's sword. The other is a furry snarling beast of a thing with magic worthy of the most powerful of witches.
Ah, but don't worry, my child, for these monsters don't hunt humans.
No, they hunt bears, and isn't that a good thing for us?)
#a.d.'s fics i suppose#a.d.'s fics i suppose.#i really like this one too!! i love fairy tales!#spiderbit#guapoduo#it's cheesy but that's fine
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Prince of Vale part 4
JNPR's room
Jaune: *slowly reading a letter* ... *Sigh*
Ren: Another love letter?
Jaune: *shake his head* I wish it was. *Put the letter down* i was summoned to my mother's funeral.
Nora: *questioning look* Weren't you going anyway? You even told us you were leaving this weekend for them.
Jaune: Going isn't the problem, it's who sent the letter. *Look through the window, seeing people walking by* ... My older sister is the one organizing the event, and last time we saw one another... *Sigh, massaging his eyelids* She's probably the person that hates me the most. She's probably blaming me for her death.
Ren: *wince* She was there when you decided to leave, right?
Jaune: ... Yeah. With everything i said to my mom, she's probably not that far from the truth. *Looking down* Words cut deep, and i bleed her without a thought.
Nora: *shake her head* I think you are assuming too much, fearless leader. She probably knows how you must feel, with how much you beat yourself down every time you make a mistake. *Point to the letter* She also sent you an invitation, which i think is more so you'd feel included, instead of out of obligation...
Jaune: *shaky breath* Maybe. But how can i face her or the rest of my family? I still tried fleeing my duties.
Pyrrha: *sitting next to him, sighing* As Ruby said, when she was consoling you, you are a teenager. You wanted freedom and your mom probably knew that. Your sister probably knew that too. I... Can't say i had as much pressure as you when i became famous, but do you really believe i never screamed at my parents? That i never told them i hated them?
Jaune: *now looking at her, all his attention on her*
Pyrrha: I... *Looking ashamed* I ran away, once... I told them i hated them, blaming them for driving all my friends away, for the expectations everyone pushed upon me... *chuckle* I even blamed them for not having a boyfriend. *Shake her head* It wasn't fair for them, they were doing what they thought was best for me. *smiling kindly at him* They searched for me in every corner of Argus. The sponsors were furious and told them that if they didn't bring me back before the end of the week, they would cut all ties with us. Do you know what my father said to them?
Jaune: ... That they would bring you back?
Pyrrha: *shaking her head, smiling* Nope. He told them, and i cite: "You can put your fucking money up your ass, i want my daughter back!" *Blushing with an embarrassed laugh* They were just next to me when i heard him say that, they didn't recognize me since i was more coat than girl. And that's nothing compared to what my mom said to them.
Jaune: *weak smile* You made up with them?
Pyrrha: *nod* Yeah... They weren't mad, all they felt was relief at seeing me well. *Look at Jaune* When you told me about your family, you spoke of them with so much love, i can't even imagine them thinking for one second you are the reason for her death. *Gentle smile* They know how much you truly loved her, Jaune. Heck, you even told us how much like you your oldest sister was. She's probably worried sick about you.
Jaune: ... *Little smile* Yeah... You're probably right... *Sigh* But... i still feel responsible, you know? I hurt her when she was at her lowest and i can't forgive myself.
Pyrrha: *hugging him* Yeah... I know. I won't tell you to stop blaming yourself, but we are here to get you through this.
Nora: *goes and hugs him too* We are your team. And as a team, we will help you all the way until you feel better.
Ren: *nod* You are like a brother to me. Your pain is my pain as well.
Jaune: *slightly blushing* G-guys... *hug them back* Thanks.
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okay fuck it i went to a leonardo da vinci exhibit today and now i have a leonardo da vinci death note AU in my head because i am a parody of myself so you can fucking have it i guess what do i even do with this
light yagami: young genius polymath who is good at literally everything
unfortunately for him he is a foreigner in italia (his family immigrated) so the government is not letting him anywhere near their weaponry projects. instead he does art. yes light yagami painted the mona lisa no i do not take criticism iâm in too deep
his portraits are predictably amazing. smash hit. soon aristocracy from all over italy is contacting him to draw them and their mother. this means he doesnt even have time in the day to draw giant fuckoff warship designs anymore. what point is there to life, he sulks.
eventually he accepts a commission from one kyosuke higuchi! weâre italianizing him because i really donât think this AU works otherwise but letâs call him higuchi anyway. higuchi is a fifty-something duke of something or other who has recently married one misa amane who is twenty-something (the same age as light). misa is the subject of the portrait because higuchi just loves his darling wife so much (read: they had a shotgun wedding and higuchi needs to keep up appearances)
light is like wow someone who isnât white itâs been like five years. i kind of feel bad for her, this situation is very suspicious. hello miss amane if youâll just sit down over there while i get my brushes
misa (seeing the first person who has been even remotely sympathetic to her absolutely horrific life, noticing he hasnât tried to make any advances on her at all [this is a good thing]): I AM DRASTICALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU.
light: what
misaâs plan of seducing light predictably fails because heâs light, so she explains she has to get the fuck away from higuchi somehow
light is like okay well i am sorry to hear that but what does this have to do with me.
misa, tearing up: im a damsel in distress! also i can get you information about his court
light: whats his job
misa: financial advisor
light: oh fuck yes okay
so lightâs plan is now to worm into the yotsuba court to get funding and hopefully sway them enough to let him pitch his cool weaponry ideas so he can Change The World. he does need income in general too (both for himself and his family; expected lifespan was way shorter then obviously).
misaâs plan is to kill higuchi somehow which will be much easier with light as backup she thinks
so. light packs up and moves to the yotsuba court which is thrilled to have THE light yagami portrait artist (i do more than portraitsâŚ) in their employ
oh yeah, misa mentions, the prince of the yotsuba court is kind of⌠weird
light: you could have told me this before
misa: ehe. dont worry about it!! itâs just um. he had a weird personality shift a few years ago? and now he refuses to wear royal attire. he always dresses like a peasant.
light: well itâs not like iâm going to be there to judge him on fashion am i.
THATâS RIGHT. SIKE THIS IS AN ISEKAI NOW. yes L does remember light killing him <3 he (L) woke up in fifteenth century renaissance italy in a twenty-something-year-old body immediately after the heart attack. by some miracle he already knew italian.
so everything is going swell until one day light walks into his workshop to find the prince flipping through his notebook
light, sleep deprived: hey what the fuâi mean. uh. good morning your highness
thereâs no need for that formality. call me L.
(âŚbut your name doesnât start with an L?) thank you, your highness L. um. sorry i know my handwritingâs messy.
on the contrary i find it completely readable, as long as one reads backwards and caesar shifts it three letters forward.
(oh SHIT heâs onto me) haha what are you talking about?
in fact i think this mechanical dragonfly contraption is rather ingenious.
oh aha thatâs not important, just a passing fancy honestly
[ignoring him] if only you had some better way of providing torque, because as it stands the spring engine is extremely poorly designed.
what the fuck did you just say to me
[they end up physically fighting over the notebook because of course they do. meet cute!]
some more details:
ryuk is the patron light eventually gets after being in higuchiâs court for a bit
rem is higuchiâs personal assistant, who was disowned by her own royal-blooded family because her family sucks. she hates her job. if it werenât for misa sheâd probably be on the other side of the country by now
i donât know where the wammy kids are. theyâre definitely competing to be the heir to Lâs throne but also theyâre not related because there is no way that all the wammy kids (the whole orphanage of wammy kids) could have come from the same person. maybe some kind of insufferably high collar royal boarding school? did they even have those? help me
kiyomi and teru are both advisors in other courts (which are extremely corrupt, light seethes, in his perfect world there wont be any of those anymore) (you work for a court light) (thats different)
okay iâm done for today. you never know about tomorrow though. /threat.
[ @deathnotetober day 12: isekai ]
#i think theres so much you could do with canon L meeting au light but i cant fucking write renaissance dialogue so here you go#death note#light yagami#misa amane#l lawliet#our three major players!#lawlight#deathnotetober#higuchi is here too but i dont know if this is enough of a him post to warrant the tag#DISCLAIMER: i know nothing about leonardo da vinci outside of the exhibition i went to today#sorry for any historical inaccuracies#on the plus side if you spot any you probably have enough knowledge to write this
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ÉŞÉ´á´á´Ęá´á´ĄÉŞÉ´á´á´
-- á´á´ á´ĘĘá´Ęɪɴɢ ÉŞÉ´ Ęá´á´á´Ąá´á´É´ (pt 2) (JWW)
ÉŞÉ´á´á´Ęá´á´ĄÉŞÉ´á´á´
-- á´á´ á´ĘĘá´Ęɪɴɢ ÉŞÉ´ Ęá´á´á´Ąá´á´É´ á´ĄÉŞÉ´á´á´Ę ęąá´á´á´ÉŞá´Ę
á´á´ÉŞĘɪɴɢ: á´Ęá´Ęá´
á´á´á´!á´Ąá´É´á´Ąá´á´ x á´Ęá´Ęá´
á´á´Ęá´ęąęą!Ęá´á´á´
á´Ę á´Ąá´: 8.2 k (consistency is key??) warnings: none for now?? hot wonwoo, lowkey obsessed wonwoo, theres like a part where he's like "oh i couldn't control myself" but it's not like a sexual predator sorta way i promise, joshua featuring!! á´/É´: i told myself i would post this before the la concert BUT i got too distracted buying a clear fucking bag from target bc i didnt know you had to bring a clear bag to us concerts??? bc ive only gone to korea concerts??? anyways, ÉŞę° Ęá´á´ á´Ąá´É´É´á´ Ęá´ á´á´Ęá´ á´ę° á´Ę á´á´É˘ĘÉŞęąá´ á´Ęęą Ęá´á´á´ á´á´ á´Ę á´á´ęąá´á´ĘĘÉŞęąá´ á´Ęá´É´á´ Ęá´á´ <3 OH also if you're confused by the (y/n) (wonwoo) parts it's like the perspective thing (the perspectives switch bc i got boredd writing only y/n pov sorry!!)
á´Ęá´á´ ÉŞá´á´ęą ; É´á´xá´
y/n
âYour grace.âÂ
A silver fine-toothed comb gently brushed through your morning hair, untangling your curled knots. The winter air chilled the room and the hazy morning sunlight shined through the sheer curtains.Â
You hummed in acknowledgement.Â
Nai continued with her rhythmic brushing, slowly adding oils and perfumes to the ends of your hair. âI do not understand these rumors as of late, your grace,â Nai huffed, setting the comb down on the vanity desk with a little more force than necessary.Â
You let out a breathy laugh, slowly running your fingers through your silken hair. âI do not think rumors exist to be understood, Nai.âÂ
Nai crosses her arms, the space between her eyebrows creasing. âBut your grace! These rumors are absolutely outlandish! You! Infertile! I just cannot even begin to wrap my head-â
At her words, you notice a new cream-colored envelope sitting on the edge of the vanity. â-then donât, Nai.â You look up at her. Her brown ringlets sit neatly against her shoulders and her wide hazel eyes are full of pure exasperation. It feels good, you think, to have someone care this much. Itâs been a while.Â
âYou donât have to understand anything for me. Rumors will remain rumors,â you hum, reaching for the envelope.Â
Nai huffs in annoyance. You know it isnât directed at you, but it still makes you smile nonetheless. Seungcheol might have been ruining your Society life, but at least he hired a maid right. Speaking of which, as your eyes glided through the contents of the palace-stamped envelope, it focused on the beginning:Â
My darling archduchess y/n,Â
I hope the duchy is prospering after my small present for your twenty third birthday. Speaking of, I have scheduled a tea for you in two days with Baron-
Again. Fucking again with the stupid engagement offers. If Seungcheol wasnât the king, you would have already slapped him twice. He had always been somewhat of a parent figure in your life, especially after your grandmotherâs death. But this? This was dangerously toeing the line of overstepping your boundaries. Actually, maybe the boundaries had been overstepped at your fifth engagement that ended with yet another cheating scandal. At this point, Prince Mingyu was right â how did Seungcheol even manage to conjure only cheating scandals for your shame to marinate in?Â
âWhose ball are we attending tonight, Nai?âÂ
Nai tries to speak around the pearl bobby pin in her mouth. âUck gong, er ace,â she starts, before she shakes her head. The bobby pin slides into your hair. âMy apologies, your grace. Duke Hongâs winter season opening ball.âÂ
You hum, toying with the edges of the envelope. If it wasnât considered palace property, you would have burned it. God. Seungcheol was really teething at your fraying nerves. Thereâs only a certain number of engagements a Society woman can go through before she is considered unmarriable. You were way past that point.Â
If the king himself was not backing you, you would have already been the Societyâs laughing stock. Because what failure of a woman cannot keep a man to herself for more than a couple of measly weeks?
At this point, you might as well just live and die alone.Â
Duke Hongâs winter season opening ball. You wouldnât have agreed to attend if it was hosted by anyone else. Duke Hong happened to be your fellow library attendant during your formative years at the National Academy. Really, it was a pity you could not just conjure up a lie and stay back in the safety of your room. You would, except you had a sinking feeling Joshua would send you letter after annoying letter until you finally decided to let up and attend.Â
You donât think you are fully ready for the full impact of the Society nobles just yet. To make matters worse, Nai had told you that she heard the people were giddy about the return of the Jeon Duchy to the capitol after the death of the previous heads of the house, and the return of the direct line, now the archduke, after his series of triumphant wins on the frontiers of the warring enemy country. The Society, you told yourself, was what you were afraid of. But a tiny (not so secret) part of you was not fully ready to see him again just yet.
The stuffy crowded ballroom seemed even more overpopulated under the yellow chandelier lights and the exponentially building pressure inside your chest. And Joshuaâs estateâs not-so-hidden balcony did not give you enough coverage in the darkening night. If Joshua had not proposed for you to stay the night (âYou should not be out after dark, y/n. Even if you have the best footmen in the world,â were his words), you would have retired to your own estate an hour ago. Actually, if Joshua had not been so adamant about your attending, you would have never left your estate in the first place.
But you could never say no to his face, especially when he pulled his little pout and sigh of faux disappointment that had followed him even out of the Academy.
There was a not-so-secret side of you that wanted to pull your hair out by the roots. The whispers, the gossips, the mumblings, the laughter that follows you wherever you go, you could do. You could live with it. You could do with it because that was what you had lived with for three years. Three miserable years of back-to-back engagements with all of High Societyâs eligible men, hand-picked by the dear, beloved king. And no, of course, Seungcheol was not to carry the entire burden of blame. You blamed every single elder in your family and the royal courts. Every male figure in your life expects you to marry some rich, handsome man. If he knew how to dance, drink, breathe, and hold some semblance of self respect, he was eligible in their eyes. Even if, in the dark cover of night, they leave their homes and sneak onto the back alleyways of carnal desire.Â
Each season of Society that passes by you is another couple of months in which your vain, naive, wishful childhood dream of wanting to marry for love!! could not come true. In some ways, it was because you fully believe that love has its time (and your time had passed away three years ago), but also because sometimes, you had learned to give up things you innately wanted for something that would benefit you a little more in the future. Something that would cause you less pain. Something that could slowly become something you love.
You feel the built-up tears fill your eyes, champagne flute resting loosely between your gloved fingers. For a moment, you wish your grandmother was back with you. She would know what to do, what to say, what to choose. You wish she could have been there, three years ago, when you tried desperately to balance the exhausting, choking, mountains of pressure of an archduchess and a fragmented heart, which slowly shattered into unmendable glass pieces. You wish she could have pulled Wonwoo aside then and told him how you had suffered, maybe bring up even a smidge of guilt, worry, regret, something.Â
But thatâs all wishful thinking, y/n, you chide yourself. Let it go, like you have done for the past three years.Â
But he wasnât here during the three years, you wish you could argue. You wish you could hope for something and follow the tugs of your heart, but there is a shallow part of your mind that tells you no. Because the first time ended in shambles. Made you the laughing stock for two whole seasons. Kick-started your rather permanent fixture in the Societyâs rumor mills. And just as you thought you had figured everything out, he comes waltzing back into your life â as part of the same royal council â like he had never left. And that in itself left a gaping, bubbling hole of rage in your heart.Â
The thin wooden door and curtain that separates you from the rest of the dancing ballroom flutters with the breeze. Your head pounds along with the bass of the cello inside â not too sure if it was caused by the champagne flute in your gloved hand or the incessant whispers that had followed your footsteps inside.Â
âWhy did you have to come back,â you mutter bitterly, gazing up at the darkened night sky. A disbelieving laugh and a shake of your head. âStop thinking about-â
 You cut yourself off when the balcony door suddenly creaks open. You turn with half a mind to tell off whoever was bold enough to interrupt your obvious solitude. However, that train of thought very quickly comes to an end when you look back over your shoulder. The face you see almost makes you want to let out a laugh.Â
The very man you were ranting to yourself about stands in the curtained doorway. You hate that you canât see his eyes behind his glasses in this light.Â
You open your mouth, nose scrunching in annoyance, about to say something along the lines of why the fuck are you here or do you find pleasure in giving me pain or can you leave, before the clouds move from the moon and you actually take him in. And not just take him in but take him in.Â
Wonwoo is standing there, chest rising and falling like he had just raced to the ball on his horse or had run around the entire Hong Estate trying to find something. Now, in the soft rays of the moonlight and the biting early-winter breeze, you can see his dark eyes behind his glasses â guarded. But as you study his (rather chiseled) face, heâs changed somehow. Your last memories of a twenty-one-year-old Wonwoo do not show the sharp intense prick of his gaze as it holds your own. You donât remember it holding the same sort of pain and weight â like he was Atlas, holding the weight of the world on his broad shoulders.Â
Handsome, you think. But itâs gone before you can put a finger on it to hold it down long enough to fully think about it. You canât really describe Wonwoo in words. That was something you had decided a long time ago.Â
He was handsome in the old-fashioned sense. A straight nose, dark almond eyes, the slightest permanent downturn of his lips. His defined jawline and his glasses that he had grown into. He was handsome in the most eligible bachelor sense. If your mother was still alive, she would have wanted you to be courted by him â no one less and no one more because there was no one more. And perhaps that was why you had been so over-the-top with him before: he was everything your mom would have adored â tall, pale, smart, handsome, built.Â
You steel yourself, letting a soft breath escape you before you say, âYour grace,â the title sounds oddly cold now coming from your parted lips, âthis is hardly the place for a welcomed noble.â You hate how your voice trembles ever so slightly at the end. Perhaps you had not been as ready for this as you thought you were. Â
Your voice seems to snap Wonwoo back to life. His lips twitch slightly but his expression remains frustratingly unreadable. âJust,â he starts, before his eyes glance at the floor, âI needed a moment,â he finally replies. And this time, his gaze is locked on yours.Â
Your throat tightens at his reply.Â
If you were nineteen-
No. You were not nineteen or twenty anymore. He had left.Â
Like everyone else did.
âSo did I.â You take a small step backwards before whispering, âI always do.âÂ
You think Wonwoo is going to continue the conversation, however strained, but he lets a silence hang in the air. It grows so thick you feel like it steals some of your oxygen away. You wonder if Wonwoo is also thinking about the past â about three years ago, about when you had nothing to worry about but being yourselves and completing school, when you had thought you would not inherit such a pressuring role until you were happily married for love. Like idiots. But even if he isnât thinking the same thing as you, the silence is almost palpable in the air. Like it is giving room, a lost opportunity back.Â
Wonwooâs eyes linger on you â not just your face but you â like heâs trying to make sense of the very thing you had tried your best to bury deep inside of you. Like he wanted you to either throw it all back up or he wanted to personally haul it to the surface. And you hated how he could make you feel naked, vulnerable, weak and like a naive, stupid child with just one look.Â
Finally, he whispers softly, âItâs been a long time, y/n.âÂ
His voice is deep and not at all how you remembered it from three years ago. It seems different from his soft murmurs you had barely heard during his royal reentry ball. Your pulse jumps traitorously.Â
âNot long enough, it seems.â The words are supposed to come out icy, but it doesnât come out as hard as you had hoped. Instead, your voice has a rather meek tone to it, as if even your vocal chords knew something you refused to admit.Â
Wonwoo doesnât answer. The only indicator that he heard you at all is the brief upward twitch of his eyebrows.Â
Youâre too proud, you know, to look away first. And you know what that will do. You can already feel the old memories â the ones you had (wished) long buried in the deepest parts of your fragmented heart â creep up: the warmth of the sun on your skin exposed on your sundress as you walked the grassy walkways of the park; the quiet laughs during an royal-sponsored opera; the knowing glances exchanged during another one of Mingyuâs complaints about a possible partner.Â
A burst of sudden loud laughter and chatter from below the balcony makes you whip around in a speed your grandmother would have called âexcruciatingly unladylike,â and catch the tip of your heel in the grooves of the marble flooring. You have one second to register Wonwooâs eyes widening and another second that is wasted on trying to save your champagne flute, before your palms are flat against Wonwooâs defined chest. Your shattered champagne flute glints against the thin moonlight, forgotten at the sudden intrusion of your privacy â a sudden casualty of his presence.Â
His hands are barely there on your waist â the only things that are preventing you from falling off the rather low balcony railing are his arms, wrapped around your frame. His face is taut, as if he was actually worried about you falling off, and your corset feels excruciatingly tight around your straining ribs.Â
His stare is heavy and it feels like that one time again. Like when he whisked you away for your first dance as a debutante and accidentally dipped you in the middle of your opening waltz and you stayed there until the eye contact became unbearably awkward. He is doing the same thing â mouth just barely open, eyes unblinking and hands fleeting on your waist.Â
You can feel his entire chest under the thin fabric of his white button down. You go to push him away but something makes you hesitate.Â
You look up at him, breath hitching automatically at the closeness between you two.Â
âWonwoo,â you whisper, fingers digging in just a little bit, âthis isâŚâ you trail off, too breathless and gobsmacked at this entire situation to continue. You just hope he is smart enough to fill in the rather obvious blanks.Â
You try to shake off the small detail that your eyes keep wandering back to Wonwooâs arms, straining against his tailored suit. Small military stars adorn his collar, and you briefly wonder if you can blame his new aura of attractive ruggedness on the war and not your own deprived state of imagination.Â
You can feel Wonwooâs grip on your waist tighten, a small crease appearing between his brow. His voice is a low murmur amongst the laughing crowd behind the curtain.Â
âAre you alright?â he asks. His breath fans over your lips. His voice is quiet and gentle â too gentle, too familiar.Â
You nod. You physically canât bring yourself to pull away. You know, you know, what this would look like if someone just simply opens the balcony door. But in your proximity, Wonwooâs cologne of some sort of earthy, gilded scent fills your senses and overwhelms your thoughts.
âYes,â you manage, although itâs barely audible. âYour grace,â you add, hoping it would force distance, force out proximity. You swallow down the lump in your throat. Your lace-covered fingers pull at your gloves.Â
The title stings the tip of your tongue as it leaves.Â
The corners of his lips pull down at the utterance of the formal title leaving your lips. His forehead creases as if the formality of your words had disrupted some sort of intercontinental balance in him. âI apologize if I intruded and startled you,â he breathes, almost too quietly. Then, softer, as if he could not help himself, ây/n.âÂ
Your name flows off of his tongue like a familiar melody â as if he had never gone away. You want to argue that he had no right to say your name â let it roll off his tongue so gently, as if he had caressed every syllable of your name. You want to yell at him to use your title. But you donât.
Your fingers tighten on the lapels of his coat.
Under his heavy stare, you canât help but feel seventeen again: waltzing gracefully up and down the gilded ballroom floors of every seasonâs opening ball; laughing under the Jeon Duchyâs libraryâs dim chandelier candle-light; walking down the Capitolâs Main Road, disguised as the common people, during the Mid Autumn Festivals. Itâs like everything you had ever experienced with the man standing in front of you crashes into your pressured body like a tidal tsunami wave. And it just keeps on coming. Wave after wave of endless memories that you thought you had wrapped and hidden in the deepest parts of your brain, being uprooted from their perfectly comfortable spot and forced back into the main chamber of your heart.Â
To make matters worse, Wonwoo just stares. His expression is silent, unreadable. Not a single word leaves his mouth. Nor a noise. He just stares, like he knows what heâs doing. Like he knows exactly whatâs going on inside your head.Â
Itâs as if the entire room â the whole world â comes to a timeless standstill. You can faintly hear the orchestra playing a classical waltz â your favorite â in the ballroom and the taps of heels as the ladies dance the night away.Â
Itâs as if Wonwooâs gaze pierces you to your soul. As if he knew exactly how hard your heart was pounding against your rib cage. As if he could hear the stifled pants and gasps of breath you were trying to hide. His face moves ever so slightly closer to yours. Strands of black hair tickle your forehead.Â
His glasses slide down slowly from the bridge of his nose.Â
âIâm sorry,â he whispers, voice thick with an emotion you canât place. Grief? Regret?Â
You look up at him at his sudden apology. âFor what, your grace?â You stubbornly keep the title. As if it could push you two apart. As if it could mask the thundering pounding of your poor heart.Â
For a second, Wonwoo looks almost pained. But it washes over back to his vague expressionless face again. You briefly wonder when his youthful tugs of emotion had disappeared.Â
âEverything,â he murmurs, and you feel his hand slowly make its way up â first your waist, shoulders, fingertips brushing against your neck â until his gloved hand cups your jaw, thumb resting lightly against your cheekbone.Â
Your eyes widen at his touches. âWon-â
â-y/n.â Wonwoo holds you like you are the only thing keeping him grounded â keeping him from flying away into the dark night sky. You see his Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallows, opening his mouth again, and this time, his eyes seem much deeper. A smile â a genuine one, unlike the one from his reentry ball â curves along his lips, dimples forming at the tips. âI missed you.âÂ
Your entire body stiffens at his three words, and you can feel tears against your waterline. Your mouth falls open in a small âoâ and your hands clench tighter against his coat lapel. Your nails dig into the thick fabric.Â
Not fair.
Wonwoo looks at you like you just hung up the stars and moon in the twilight expanse.Â
âWonwoo,â you mutter, looking away from his eyes. Youâre afraid that if you keep eye contact, heâll find out what you truly feel â what your walls are hiding.Â
âY/n,â he replies, before his hand gently turns your head. He sounds so confident â as if he could protect you from everything â Society, marriage, whispers, gossip. His touch is so soft, so warm, so familiar that you let yourself be turned. You let his fingertips linger on your jaw, your cheek, thumbing your lips. You let his hair droop down to your forehead. You let his eyes trail down to the necklace that rests on the space between your collarbones and trail lower and lower. You let him do everything for a second.Â
And your heart stops.Â
Because in the next second, his head dips. His hand on your waist tightens its grip. His thumb caresses your cheek. And his lips are on yours.Â
His lips are on yours.Â
Eyes closed, Wonwoo presses his lips against yours like they never left. Like his lips alone could mend the gaping hole in your heart.Â
And itâs almost as if you have no control of your body because you find yourself melting into his embrace, eyes fluttering shut and hands pulling him a little closer than necessary.Â
Soft, is your first thought.Â
Wonwooâs hand suddenly wraps around the back of your neck, tilting your head up to meet his lips in a deeper embrace. He breaks away for the briefest of moments, eyes dark and breath coming out in small pants like yours. You feel like your lungs are on fire. You find your hands buried in his messy black locks.Â
âFuck,â Wonwoo breathes, and you swear he looks a little crazed. Like he had been starved off of something he desperately needed for the longest time. âI missed you so much,â he confesses.Â
His words trickle down your throat like agave honey â like sweet distilled liquor. Itâs everything you had asked for.Â
Except heâs late. Maybe too late?Â
But you donât really have the time to delve into that train of thought before Wonwooâs lips are on yours again, stealing your words and breath from the confines of your mouth. His tongue swipes testingly against your lips and out of habit, they open the slightest bit.Â
Wonwooâs grip against your neck, your waist, is tight, like heâs afraid youâll fall out of his arms. Like heâs so afraid of you sinking into the dark.Â
And then itâs as if your entire being is suddenly wide awake â out of this weird, hazy, wrong drunken stupor.Â
Because at that moment, the balcony door that had once shielded you is thrown open and loud, half-drunken conversations flood both your ears.Â
You donât even have the time to step away from Wonwoo before a scandalized gasp allows itself to pierce and fill the silenced air.Â
Lady Lim stands in the doorway, her fan dangling from her hand and another holding a champagne flute.Â
Your eyes snap open first.Â
Out of pure fight-or-flight, you shove Wonwoo off of you, breaking the kiss immediately. Wonwooâs eyes are wide in shock, like he did not even expect himself to kiss you. Both of your chests heave (more yours than his), and you can feel your body tremble as adrenaline runs through you.Â
âOh my!â Lady Limâs shocked voice pierces through the night. âOh dear, please forgive me,â she stumbles through her words, fan snapping open. You hear the quick snap of another fan unfurling and the hurried click-clack of heeled shoes running the other way. She fans herself with a dramatic flare, though her eyes never leave the scandalous little tableau that she had walked herself into.Â
Itâs like all blood circulation is cut off from your limbs and any blood circulating in your head rushes to your thudding heart when you finally realize just how close, how unfitting, you and Wonwoo seem. Literally, you can already hear whispers form. And you can already picture it. Itâs clear as a spring morning in your head. This scandal will ripple through every single fucking household by tomorrow morning. And if not tomorrow morning, then by afternoon tea.Â
âOh I am terribly sorry,â she starts, and without even a single glance towards her, you know she knows it is you. âSo very sorry,â she repeats, though it is obvious her apology is directed more towards the laughable sight of you than the indecent situation itself and the mischievous glint in her eyes tell another story.Â
You can physically feel your reputation, your dignity, your name that you had worked up from absolutely nothing shatter on the floor. You can feel your stomach twisting in on itself and every little thing you ate tonight makes its slow way back up your esophagus. Your honor is at stake. And although you had said something about not marrying (ever) and just living your life in your countryside ducal house, at the end of the day, you were nothing without Society. As a woman you were absolutely nothing without Society. But Wonwooâs grasp of you doesn't seem to falter and your inhales quicken into an almost-desperate gasp of breaths when you start to see a crowd form and whisper.
You blame it on your imagination when you think you feel Wonwoo shift slightly to completely shield you from view. His body is still too close. Itâs not what you think it is, you want to scream, but you know that will only worsen the situation. Your brain feels like a ticking bomb and you briefly wonder if Joshua will save you from this situation or if you will need to figure it out yourself. Now, your breaths are clearly audible â almost gasps of oxygen as you try desperately to not cry, scream, and throw up.Â
Suddenly, you feel Wonwoo slowly move his hands up towards your shoulder, gently patting it, as if to calm you. It does absolutely jack shit to calm you. You shove his hand off of your skin.
His calm voice cuts through the chatter: âThis is not what it appears to be.âÂ
But those words and his hands only serve to quicken your anxiety-induced breath.
Wonwooâs been out of Society, not you. You donât even have the time to think about your shit-show of a reputation, especially now that the entire three quarters of High Society has caught you so precariously positioned. So, you shove Wonwoo off of you with all your strength. Itâs not much, but he stumbles backwards, leaving you almost shaking on the small balcony, under the wide-eyed stares and the gossiping lips beneath the fans of the ballroom. If anyone was drunk, they werenât now. How could they ever miss another one of Duchess Y/n Parkâs scandals?
Your mouth went dry. If this was anywhere but your current place, you could have scoffed and then broken down into tears. At least the high heavens are serious about not letting you find a workable marriage.Â
Lady Lim slowly disperses back into the crowd, only the curtain closing behind her giddy form, no doubt to tell anyone who did not know the entire story.Â
The moment the curtain closes, itâs like your soul returns to your body. You collapse into your skirts, back against the iron railing. Your hands tremble until you dig your nails into your palms.Â
âThis is the worst fucking thing that could have happen,â you whisper, a horrified look evident in your eyes. You dare to look up at Wonwoo and you feel a tear slip out. âWhy would you do that?â Your voice is hoarse, barely audible. The only thing that circles your mind is reputation, reputation, reputation, on and on and on. You try to ignore the way you pulled him close just mere seconds ago. The way you breathily moaned into his lips as well.Â
That seems to work on Wonwoo because his expression immediately softens and his eyes fill with what you haphazardly tack as genuine remorse. He reaches out to you, but then hesitates when you flinch ever so slightly. His hands fall to his sides.Â
âIâm sorry,â he whispers, but his fingers gently touch his lips like he canât believe they were just on yours. âIâll set it right,â he promises. And maybe it's the steadiness in his voice, but for some reason, a small, naive part believes him for a fleeting moment.Â
Until the curtain was strewn open again.Â
This time, Duke Hong filled the doorway.Â
And it isnât even a question to anyone who he cares for more because without even a second look at Wonwoo, he runs to your side.Â
ây/n.â You allow his warm touch around your shoulders as he hauls you up. He gives you one quick look over and itâs like he knows how the entire situation ran down.
At least, you think bitterly, if I finally get ousted from Society, Joshua will still entertain me.Â
âWait-â Wonwoo starts, his hand going out again, only to be stopped by a withering glare on Joshuaâs part.Â
His usually warm doe eyes are dreadfully, terrifyingly sharp as they drill into Wonwooâs. âI think you have done quite enough, your grace,â he forces through clenched teeth.Â
Then:
âYouâre okay,â he whispers, leading you through the parting of people. A thick fabric is tossed over your shoulders, the hood coming up over your face. It was as if stepping a foot into your space could contaminate them with the Disease of the Scandals. You barely register him gesturing off to the side and saying something before he guides you again, a gentle pat here-and-there on your bare shoulder.
âYouâre such a liar,â you mumble, lace gloves going up to dab at your watery eyes.
When did I even start crying?
It does nothing to quell your situation. Instead, your tears run down your cheeks. âDonât lie to me, Shua.âÂ
Joshua is quiet as he leads you down a hall and into his personal parlor. When you step into the room, the door shuts. He says nothing as he sits you down on a stuffed recliner and hands you a glass of tea.Â
He is quiet until you swallow down your first sip and your tears have mostly stopped.Â
He clears his throat as he stands above you, thick arms crossed and his hair falling into his eyes. âWhat the fuck was that?â His hand rakes through his hair and his sudden emphasis on the curse word makes you jump in your seat. His concerned doe eyes turn to you and he marches over, laying a hand on your shoulder. âDid he touch you?â he asks, eyebrows furrowing together worryingly. âDid he â God forbid â force you into that situation?â His grip on your shoulder tightens as you donât answer.Â
Your cheeks heat up. âNo!â you splutter, setting the teacup down. âOh my god, no! No, no, no, no!â You chant, slapping Joshuaâs arm in retaliation. âWhy would youâ No!â Your fingers went to your temples and your eyes closed.Â
âThen what? Did he pull you in and kiss you?â Joshua demands.
You hesitate. âWellâŚâ you trail off, looking down at your skirts. It gives Joshua all the confirmation he needs.
His eyes bug out of their sockets. âHe kissed you? Out of absolutely fucking nowhere?â Joshuaâs voice raises an entire pitch, ringing through the foyer.Â
You wince. âGod, can we not talk about what just happened?â You beg, desperation seeping into your voice. âActually,â you state, pushing Joshuaâs hand off your shoulder and standing up, âIâm leaving. No way,â a laugh of pure disbelief escapes you, âabsolutely no way Iâm staying here.â You turn when Joshuaâs voice rings out.Â
âY/n, wait. Are you okay, though?âÂ
âWhat?â
Joshua closes the distance between you two, bringing you into a hug. It is so sudden it takes you off guard and your first reaction is to pull away â leave the situation. Like you try to do every time. But Joshua keeps you there, stroking your hair. And itâs like the entire situation feels so much more real. You feel yourself shaking and it doesnât register to you that you are crying again until Joshuaâs murmurs fill your ears.Â
âYouâre okay. Itâs going to be okay. Iâve got you.â Joshuaâs whispers, however fake they will be, offer a slant of confidence in your ruined Society life at least for one season. But even his words tremble at the end and you know heâs lying to calm your soul for this fleeting moment.Â
âIâm ruined, Shua,â you sob, and your hands grab his coat, tears staining his beige silk shirt. You canât even begin to think of what would happen tomorrow, the day after, a week after, at the next ball, even. You refuse to admit how much the consequences of tonight scare you.Â
Joshua hums into your hair, swaying the two of you slowly. His pats encourage more caged words to tumble out of your mouth as your sobs die down.
A stuttered breath. âI donât know why this keeps happening to me,â you murmur, your throat hurts from your gasps of breath as you try to maintain some sort of dignity in front of the older man. âI donât know why- I just keep becoming the, the, the rumor mill of High Society. I donât know why- â why canât I just keep to myself?â Your voice cracks at the end as tears fall down your cheeks again, hot and wet against your porcelain blushed cheeks.Â
Joshuaâs hold tightens at your ending words and he mumbles, ây/n, y/n, this â any of this â was never your fault. Wonwoo should have been more careful. He of all people knows how Society works,â he comforts, pulling away slightly. A sad smile is on his lips when he sees your tear-stricken face, black smudging your waterline. He takes a handkerchief out and dabs at your undereyes gently, wiping the running makeup.Â
You sniff, looking down at your feet. âDonât look at me like that,â you whisper. When you look back up, Joshuaâs eyes are wide as they take in your watery eyes again. âDonât look at me with pity. I donât deserve it.â Without wanting to, your lips stretch into a bitter smile. Itâs always been like this. Ever since he left, people had always looked at you with a fleeting sense of pity. A sense of patronizing pity â oh, you poor, poor, naive little girl, it seemed to whisper. You shouldâve known better.Â
Joshua shook his head. âYou know I donât pity you, y/n.â His words are firm, like he has always been. You lean back into his comforting embrace, arms pulled close to your chest, letting his familiar warmth encase you for a moment. Briefly, you wonder if this was what it would have felt like growing up with an older brother.Â
ây/n, if you donât mind me asking,â Joshua trails off, swaying gently. His fingers comb through your hair.Â
You hum, body-wracking tears dying down.Â
He clears his throat and you know what he is about to ask before he even opens his mouth. âAre you truly over him?â a pause. Joshua continues, âOf course, Iâm not saying I donât believe you. Or that itâs wrong in any sense. Actually, I think Seungcheol would much rather you-â he cuts himself off like he just said something he wasnât supposed to say. He coughs to fill the silence. âItâs just, maybe itâs not so simple, you know? Of course, I was never very close to the Archduke, even during our shared Academy time, but Iâve seen him more than you have, definitely, over his absence in Society. I donât know, of course, fully, his true feelings, but I feel as though heâs always held a conflicted heart towards you.âÂ
You almost scoff at his words. âConflicted?â You repeat. If anything, you were the one who was conflicted, not him.Â
Joshua hesitates, as if heâs choosing the right word to continue his explanation. As if he knows with just one word, all the walls you have built over Wonwooâs absence will come tumbling down, brick by brick.Â
âPerhaps not conflicted, per se,â he hums, pulling away so he can look you in the eyes. âBut maybe more so regretful? Sorrowful, I think, may be the right word to describe it.â He lets his words hang in the foyer air.Â
Sorrowful, you think. Itâs almost laughable how comparable that word is to how you felt â wrathful, destitute, longing for something you knew was never going to come true.Â
You catch yourself before your thoughts go further down, shaking your head as if it would get rid of everything. âWhatever he feels, we are over. We are a scandal waiting to happen â even tonight! Look at us! Look at me! Whenever Iâm around him, Shua, I just completely lose it! Fuck,â you sigh, and you sink down into your skirts. Your brain hurts from how much your two sides are arguing. One part of you wants desperately to tell Joshua how you feel. How, since Wonwooâs return, every night as you laid in bed, you could only replay the image of him kissing your knuckles. How, since his greeting words, your fluttering heart started to stutter when the morning mail came in, as if waiting for a letter. Another part of you want to keep it all a secret â pretend it never existed. If you pretend hard enough, maybe it will slowly become the truth. That part wants you to stay in this cycle, and maybe one day, Seungcheol would finally find someone good enough that you could ignore all of their nightly walks for.Â
Joshua looks at you. And this time, both of you know itâs with pity â not for you but for your conflicted state. âBe honest with yourself, y/n. At least for matters concerning love,â he advises, bringing your hands up to his lips. A quick kiss is placed onto your knuckles before he steps away, towards the door.Â
âWhere are you going?â you ask.Â
Joshua gives you a tired smile and a knowing look. Then you register the faint hums of the orchestra from outside. âDucal duties, I guess. I have a ball to run,â he laughs, before placing a hand on your shoulder. âStay here for however long you need to. Iâll have the kitchen staff send something up for you.â He hesitates before adding, âIâll try to clean up this situation the best I can.âÂ
You must be getting closer to your period because those simple words almost have you close to tears again. You give him a watery smile. âThank you, Joshua.âÂ
Joshua just grins, stepping out. âAnything for my junior.â And the door clicks shut behind him.Â
As soon as the door closes, you collapse onto the nearest couch. You swallow, head slamming into the nearest cushion.Â
Donât think about it. Donât think about it and maybe itâll just die over.Â
You laugh to yourself.Â
When has it ever âjustâ died over.Â
WonwooÂ
Wonwoo swears he didnât even know y/n was on the balcony. He was just overwhelmed â overwhelmed by the sudden mass of people crowding him when he didnât expect it. It made his heart thud in his chest and made him forget every noble etiquette he learned in his formative years.Â
Wonwoo swears his first intention was to kiss you. But when he had you so close and you looked up at him with such honeyed eyes, everything he learned, he forgot. It was as if his years on the battlefield rid him of his confidence with you. It was as if he was back when he was twenty one, stealing a first (and last) hesitant kiss from you in the royal orchards.Â
Wonwoo swears he didnât mean for this entire thing to happen. Heâs not praying for your societal downfall, of course not! He didnât waltz himself into the stupid winter season opening ball just to kiss you and then have one of the biggest blabbermouths of Society walk in on you two. Hell, he didnât even want to be at the stupid fucking ball to begin with. But Seungcheol said something about his duty as an archduke to show up to opening season balls or something and he found himself in a carriage, being dropped off in front of the Hong Estate.Â
After Joshua had taken you away, it was like the world started spinning again. And he found himself trying to escape a crowd of people until Joshua had returned and concluded the ball.Â
Which is how he finds himself in Joshuaâs study, staring at Joshuaâs back as he watches the last of his guests leave through the large study windows.Â
The room is hushed, and a thick tension overlays the entire atmosphere of the room. Itâs dimly lit and Wonwoo notices the sheer number of bookshelves and portraits of the previous dukes of the Hong line that decorate the walls. Joshuaâs study is the epitome of tradition, of duty, of something he never saw himself to be. Joshua himself stands at the windowsill, arms crossed, and his usually calm demeanor obviously frayed at the end.Â
It makes Wonwooâs current situation that much more terrifying.Â
Joshua breaks the silence first, his voice low but unmistakably sharp.Â
âWhat the fuck was that, Wonwoo?âÂ
There is no preamble, no pleasantries. It was very unlike Joshua to get straight to the point.
The words are distinctly sharp but they very obviously carry a tone of accusation and an undercurrent of disbelief. Like he could not believe Wonwoo was here to begin with.Â
Joshua turns slowly, brows furrowed and eyes narrowing. âYouâve been gone for years and this is the first thing you do?â A laugh of disbelief cuts through the air. âHave you lost your goddamn mind?âÂ
Wonwooâs jaw locks at his accusing words. His voice is tight with irritation. Joshuaâs (in)advertent accusation pricks some shallow part of his conscience. âMaintain your-âÂ
â-Maintain my what? My position?â Joshua interrupts like he just heard the most outrageous thing from the night. He leans against a bookshelf, a shaking exhale leaving his body. âDo you even know what you just dragged the poor girl into?âÂ
âWhat exactly do you think I did?â Wonwoo blanches, straightening. He didnât hold her against her will or force her into any situation. He was just-
Joshua steps a step closer and under this light, Wonwoo can very clearly see the barely-controlled anger in Joshuaâs eyes. âYou know what I mean. What you did tonight,â he gestures vaguely off to the side, âthere is no excuse for that.â His arms cross, tone dropping to something quieter and much more piercing. âAnd you pull this shit after everything sheâs been through?â he scoffs, âDo you know what this scandal will do to her? What she had to fucking live with for the three years you were conveniently gone from her life?â Every curse word that leaves Joshuaâs unlikely mouth stings. Especially because during the entirety of Wonwooâs fifteen years of knowing Joshua, heâs never heard a single curse word leave the manâs mouth until now.Â
Wonwooâs brows furrow in confusion. âWhat-â Joshuaâs words echo in his head. âWhat do you mean by that?âÂ
Joshuaâs frustration only deepens at his words. âThe whispers that followed y/n?â He lets out a small, bitter laugh when Wonwoo stares at him like he just uttered something in a completely different language. âOf course,â he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. âOf course you didnât know. You werenât even here,â he strains. âYou have no idea â not even an inkling â of what she had to go through. The rumors, the scandals, the fucking engagements that all ended in-â Joshua cuts himself off with a frustrated sigh, closing his eyes.Â
Wonwoo blinks, a sense of dread overcoming his senses. âEngagements? What- what are you-âÂ
Joshua perfectly ignores him. âYou think she can just simply brush off whatever you just did? That Society will let her brush it off?âÂ
Wonwooâs gaze wavers as something tightens in his chest. Itâs like every one of Joshuaâs words hit something in him. He steps backwards slightly. His hands shake in fists next to him. âI never meant for this entire thing to happen,â he mutters. But he canât help the guilt that begins to creep into his voice. âI never intended for any of this, Joshua.âÂ
At his shaking words, Joshuaâs posture lets up the slightest bit. Instead of pure anger, there is now a quiet concern that mixes itself in.
âYou think sheâs been waiting for you this entire time, Wonwoo?â he asks. âNo, your grace.â The title hits Wonwoo hard. âSheâs been through enough, man. Let her live.â He takes a slow step towards Wonwoo, eyes softer now. âDo you know how each of her engagements ended, Wonwoo?â Joshuaâs jaw clenches. âWith each and every man going off with some other whore in the back alleys. Every. Single. One.âÂ
The weight of Joshuaâs words hit him like a horse plowing through the fields. âI-â he doesnât even know what to say. Each and every man going off with some other whore. The phrase repeats itself over and over and over inside his head. He doesnât even know what the emotions that wrack his body are. Anger? Guilt? Some sort of combination?Â
âSheâs always been frightfully alone â against Society, the judgment, the pain of the engagements. The entire Society just sees her as a scandal waiting to happen.â Joshua lets out a breath, swallowing.Â
Wonwoo is frozen in his place, every word that leaves Joshuaâs mouth cutting a deeper wound into his heart. âI never wanted that for her,â he whispers. âI never wanted her to feel alone. I never-â
â-But you did, Wonwoo.â Joshuaâs voice cracks and his eyes glisten with pity. âWonwoo, when you left, you absolutely broke her.âÂ
At his words, Wonwoo stumbles back like it is a physical blow.Â
âShe cried almost every other night. She wouldnât eat at her own estate so Seungcheol ordered her to stay at the palace. Mingyu,â he lets out a frustrated laugh, âMingyu, he had to carry her up to a guest room every night because she would fall asleep in the library.â Joshuaâs gaze is piercing. âBut I guess you were too busy doing whatever.âÂ
Wonwooâs eyes are wide, his breath still in his throat. He feels his stomach twist and his hands clench into fists. âI didnât know,â he repeats, almost as if it's a mantra that keeps him afloat. As if he was trying to convince himself. He feels something break inside of him â a dam, a wall, something. Because for the first time since his return, he feels the full weight of the distance between him and y/n. No. Maybe it was always there to begin with and he had refused to face it. He can finally feel the missed years, the cut conversations, the things she had to endure without him. The things she had to endure because of him. Itâs like everything is crashing down around him in pieces of broken glass, cutting small pieces of his skin. Itâs like all of his mistakes, his failures, his greed that made him think only of himself, comes crashing down in full-force.Â
âHow do I-â Wonwoo mumbles. There is a strange pressure behind his eyes. âHow do I fix this?â When he looks back up at Joshua, heâs at a loss for words. âI never meant to hurt her.âÂ
Joshua shakes his head slowly, voice firm in this. âBut you did. You canât change that now, three years later. Just fix it. Sheâs suffered long enough.â Joshua steps back, turning to the window. âShow her that youâre not leaving again. That she can trust you again.âÂ
âAnd if it doesnât work?â Wonwooâs voice sounds broken, even to his own ears.Â
Joshua pauses. He looks over his shoulder. âThen it doesnât. But if you feel anything towards her, youâll try.âÂ
Wonwooâs eyes close and his hands find purchase on Joshuaâs desk. Stupid, he thinks, swallowing back lumps in his throat. Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. Shouldâve stayed away.Â
: ĚĚâ ÉŞÉ´á´á´Ęá´á´ĄÉŞÉ´á´á´
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