#what the fuck is my ask tag again. guh.

[delta-syrup]

🖊️Delta! I've wanted to know what his personality is like, or just him in general!

Delta my good friend Delta… he is my gay little beast of a fursona. He is like me in some ways, and not like me in others. He’s sort of like, an exaggerated version of me, and drizzled with a bit of wish fulfillment. I made him as my first fursona in 2016, and he has been my sona ever since.

Delta is very. Silly and chaotic. He’s a poor little meow meow. Around his friends he is very energetic and chatty, but quite shy around people he doesn’t know. He’s a bit of a drama queen and is very very emotional. He cries a lot, and not just when he’s sad.

He likes to act like he’s really cool and put together, but he’s not. Like at all. Big loser (affectionate). He’s a big dummy but he’s also very wise. It depends on the situation. He can’t do math to save his fucking life and sometimes he forgets basic information but he also loves media analysis and is pretty damn good at it. Very clumsy as well, he trips over his own two feet a lot.

He’s really really really passionate about his interests and the things he cares about. If you get him started talking abt something he likes, like ace attorney or whatever, he will not shut up for hours (<- can you tell this part is very heavily based on me). He loves talking w his friends, and he also loves bitching and complaining with his friends. He can be a bit snarky, sarcastic, and bitchy, but would never intentionally hurt someone’s feelings.

He’s pretty funny and people like to spend time with him… he gives good advice and likes to help people as much as he can. Delta is very empathetic and understanding of just about everyone, even people he doesn’t like. While it has its benefits, it’s also gotten him in trouble before, bc it means he doesn’t like starting shit w people bc he understands where they’re coming from. That being said, he’s stubborn as FUCK, and once he’s made up his mind about something, it’s very hard to change his mind. When he feels strongly about something, he doesn’t hesitate to make his feelings known, even if no one else agrees with him.

[oepionie]

—VOICELINES ABOUT YOU. various

Synopsis: Yuuken interrogates some of the boys on the campus about their special someone. Hearing their loving ramblings on you was certainly not what he expected.

Tags: Self-Indulgent, Fluff, Angst if you squint really hard, Reader is not Yuu, Tweels are a bit...too mad in love, I brainrotted so hard, You're Malleus' fiancee, Malleus doesn't know how to tell a joke someone help him

Cw. Riddle's Mother, Overworking, Hospitalizations, Poor living conditions, Illness, Bullying, Allusions to violence, Marriage, Tad bit of possesive behavior, Description of stabbing

WordCount: 2k+ | 💌Masterlist

R.R | RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS:

About: Riddle's Rose

"Rose? I see you've met that troublesome intern at the library. That's a nickname. Their name is (Y/N) and yes, they are my partner." "A-Ah? I'm so direct? Well, you asked me a question! Though...I would prefer that this discussion end here. I prefer to keep my relationship with them private.”

Chat: Childhood Memories

“Ever since we were young, (Y/N) was quite rebellious. The complete opposite of me as a child, really. They were always sneaking off during the night and coming over to visit me. Mother...didn't approve of them and often screamed in their face. I was quite terrified she would scare them away, though that didn't stop them at all. Haha, I think they got even more persistent afterwards. I am truly glad I met them.”

Personal Story: To the Hospital

“Again...? I see. Thank you, Trey. Hmph, I'll have to schedule another visit once more."

> "Riddle? What's wrong?"

"Ah, Yuuken—It's Rose. They've gotten admitted to the hospital...again. (Y/N) is quite impulsive and tends to bite off more than they can chew. On more than occasion, like now, I would find out about their hospital admissions via Trey days or even weeks after."

>"Aren't you dating? Why aren't they telling you?"

"They claim that they withhold the information from me out of concern for my workload or out of fear of being a burden. Though that is—a sentiment I don't understand. Nothing is more important to me than their health."

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R.B | RUGGIE BUCCHI

About: The Photo In His Wallet

"Where is it?! Man, I'm so fucked if I lost it—Oh?! Oi, Yuuken! That wallet's mine! Man, thanks a lot. I really would've been screwed over if it weren't for you." "Eh? The photo? Shishishishi curious, aren't cha? Hmmm...how 'bout this? You get me a steaming hot meat bun and I'll give you a story time about them."

Chat: A Hopeful Future

"My studies? Course I take them seriously! That's what's gonna' put food on the table one day. Plus, I wanna' give (Y/N) the life they deserve—What'd I mean? Well, if I'm going to be their husband, I want 'em to live comfortably. It's not like we need anythin' luxurious, anyways. As long as we're together and there's enough food to go by, it's going to be all right."

Personal Story: In Sickness and In Health

"....that's good to hear. Please look after 'em, granny. Love ya." The call ends and Ruggie sighs. "That's the best news I've received since."

>"News?"

"Guh-?! Man! What's with you and sneaking up on me!? Yeah yeah—you heard right...news. Granny just called me to talk about (Y/N), their health is looking up. Tell ya' what, I knew that deal with Azul was worth it. I managed to snag some medicine and send it home."

>"Oh? Medicine?"

"Yeah. Ever since my first year of high school, they were sick and bedridden. (Y/N)'s parents don't have enough money for a doctor, so there's not much they can do. Of course, I'm out here doin' my best to help too."

"I really...I really wanna see them up and runnin' again. Hey, who knows—maybe we'll get to make flower crowns for the village kids again...together."

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A.A | AZUL ASHENGROTTO

About: An Interrogation

"Yuuken, you’ve met (Y/N), I hear. Well, as their partner, it's only right that I ask you about it. I assume you don't mind. So, what is your opinion of them? Nothing short of perfection, I hope."

"Hm? You think they're nice? Good then."

Chat: Busy Octoboss

"With all the deals, my maintenance of my academic ranking, and my position as Monstro Lounge's manager, my workload is quite substantial compared to most. And, I regret to say that it does get in the way of my personal life, including quality time with my lover. It tears at my heart, yet I cherish how they're so understanding and patient. Still, sometimes I can't help but think I am undeserving of them..."

Personal Story: Deep Sea Bonds

"My childhood is not something that I appreciate or want to remember. Yet, despite everything I've been through, I do think it is pleasant to look back on the days when I met them. You see, (Y/N) was bullied too. They were just like me, relentlessly bad mouthed and hurt by the kids around us. However, they never failed to greet me every day with a bright smile on their face."

>"What a sunny person."

"They'd also always have the courage and bravery to stand up for me, often taking the brunt of the bullying. I wish I could say I did the same for them...but I was far too cowardly back then..."

>"Wow. You two must be really close, then."

"Of course. They've been through a lot.Which is exactly why I won't allow anyone to speak ill of them anymore." Azul pauses, smiling slyly. "Say, Yuuken. You'll tell me if anyone casts aspersions on my Angelfish, won't you?"

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J.L | JADE LEECH

About: A Helping Hand

"Hm? What's that? Ah, you’ve met my darling pearl. I see. I do notice how you’ve been frequenting Monstro Lounge lately…Have you perhaps acquired a romantic interest towards them? No? Hehe, Alright." "Now, to answer your question, yes, that is right; (Y/N) routinely comes over to visit and aid me in my Mountain Treks. I couldn't be more grateful for their assistance."

Chat: The Pearl Ring

"Oya? I see you're curious about the ring I've been crafting. Well, it's for (Y/N). You see, in merfolk culture, we create handcrafted jewelry to serve as a courting gift. This is one of many ornaments I plan on giving them. Though, this one is...particularly unique. Ah, well...(Y/N) Leech does have a nice ring to it, does it not?"

Personal Story: A Jaded Reaction

"Oya? (Y/N) is spending the night at Ramshackle? Whatever reason for?"

>"Grim wanted to have a game night."

"Ah. I see. How...lovely. What's that? My smile is frightening you? Oho, now is it? Hehe, my deepest apologies. We eels tend to be quite...protective. I so anticipate you to take good care of them. And fret not, as long as you keep them away from any harm, no disputes shall arise."

>"Uh...and if something happened?"

"What if something happened...? Well, I'm sure you wouldn't mind being hunted down the face of the earth, tied up, and pulled down to the deepest pits of the blue ocean, where no one can hear your anguished cries for help...Would you?" 

>"..."

"Just joking. I would never do that."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

F.L | FLOYD LEECH

About: A Sea Walnut

"(Y/N)? Aha~~~ You've heard of my little sea walnut? They're so adorable and squishy, yanno!—Is there a problem? If you got a problem with 'em, I'll squeeze you." "Oh? Not scared at all, huh? Ehe~ You sure are ballsy. Tread carefully now, shrimpy~!"

About: Ocean Currents

"Whenever a strong ocean current comes, sea walnut always huddles close to me and grabs my arm. They've always been afraid of being blasted away."

"They used to do that a lot when we were kids, but it never gets old. Hehe~ Sometimes, I lead them to places where the waves are strong, jus' so they can cling onto me! It's so funny to see 'em get afraid and scramble after me when I move too far away. "

Personal Story: Shark Attack

"Hmm~? Oh, what're these bite marks? Rad, aren't they? I got them after fighting a buncha' sharks."

>"Sharks?! Why would you do that?"

"To get these. It's shark teeth. Our anniversary is comin' up, and Jade suggested that I should make some jewelry for them. It's a merfolk courting thing. Azul 'n Jade told me to get them pearls, but I thought that was boring. So, I'm making one with shark teeth instead! Isn't that cool~?"

>"I-I guess, but what happened to the sharks?"

"Ugh. None of them were a fun hunt. The entire hoard swam away so fast. Can you believe it???… I’m not the typa eel who would let my prey get away that easily, though. And it’s not like I had anything better to do. Ehehe! There were so many of those sharks swarming around, but I managed to squeeze them all! Well, it was worth it in the end cuz I got what I wanted. I'll do anythin' for my little sea walnut~"

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

J.V | JAMIL VIPER

About: A Hearty Meal

“What am i doing? Well, I'm making some Roast Chicken with Sumac Flatbread. Oh? Who's (Y/N)? Ah, Kalim must have told you, huh. (Y/N) is my partner. They are truly wonderful."

"For example—Though I like to think I'm skilled at disguising my true feelings, the moment I go to see them, they already know what I'm thinking. They have a keen sense of intuition and always seem to know what I need and when I need it. Truly, I'm grateful for such a caring—Ah, I'm sorry. I was rambling again."

Chat: Snake-Eyed Envy

"I can't dispute that a lot of people back home are vying for their affection.That bothers me at times. As Kalim's babysitter-ehem, retainer, I don't have enough time to check in on them every day...However, as cheesy as it sounds, I have yet to meet someone who is as smitten with (Y/N) as I am."

Personal Story: World Left Unsaid

"I soon understood that I was more than the circumstances of my birth, all thanks to (Y/N). In fact, My bond with Kalim has become stronger and more genuine thanks to them. I...realized my hatred for Kalim was just my desire for my circumstances to be different...I didn't hate him at all. Without (Y/N), I would never have understood it."

>"They must be very important to you, Jamil."

"Absolutely. I was terrified that I might lose them after my overblot. But to my surprise, they stayed with me. Naturally, it hurt them, but they were really compassionate towards me and about how much I had to go through."

>"Do they know of what you feel?"

"I...I don't think (Y/N) realizes just how much I cherish them. I don't think now's the right time for that though. I've hurt them too much and I still have a long way to go before I fix things."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

M.D | MALLEUS DRACONIA

About: He's Engaged?!

"I am, indeed, betrothed. Heh. Why are you looking so bewildered, Child of Man? If I'm going to be a king someday, it only makes sense that I would need someone to reign alongside me, no? At first glance, (Y/N) may seem aloof, but as you get to know them more, you'll see that they are actually incredibly lovely and warm."

"You never thought I was one for romance? My, my... What a bold statement, you best learn how to hold your tongue. Have you considered that I could use lightning to smite you where you stand?...Now, now—That was a joke. You don't have to cower in fear."

Chat: Safe And Sound

"My precious treasure tells me that I tend to get protective at times. Though can you really fault a lover for wanting to protect the one who is most important to them in this cruel, ruthless world. One where others will not hesitate to turn on you?"

Personal Story: The Art Of War

"I am actually the first of my lineage to wed someone who is not a noble. You see, (Y/N) is a knight-in-training. And, as you can probably guess, they served as my retainer. To see them at work was truly a magnificent sight to witness. They command attention and radiate strength. While I had always admired them, I could not bring myself to express my true feelings to them. Until...that night."

>"That night?"

"Yes. On the evening of Silver's 16th birthday, someone had rushed at me with a dagger in hand. (Y/N) was the first to respond and took the hit for me...The sound of their screams as the knife tore through their flesh was truly...horrifying."

>"That's horrible! What happened to the guy?"

"Worry not, he was taken care of accordingly....If there is anything I’ve learned from Lilia's many teachings, it’s that the worst calamities that befall an army arise from hesitation. To avoid further offensives, one must deal with and eliminate adversaries as soon as possible. Don't you think so?"

Likes and Reblogs are greatly appreciated and are very motivating on my end!

Taglist: @keedas @spadecentral @crypticbibliophile @pastellepastary @cassidycampfire @cocomollo @poisonioushearts @anonima-2 @kawaiipotatoghost @ramvuda @sweeneyblue1 @the-lost-anime-dad @chuuchuudreams @taruruchi

↳ want to be added?

[riconas]

Rico, that mountrain ficlet fucked up my whole day, thank you for that!

May I humbly request some bottom Aether just desperate for Dew's little knot? And maybe Dew's just as out of his mind but trying so hard to keep his composure and give Aether what he needs? c:

guh huh

tags: knotting (duh)

Chest pressed to the mattress, back arched like a goddamn cat, Aether reaches behind him and uses both hands to spread his cheeks, and Dew thinks he might actually go insane. 

“Give it to me,” Aether breathes. “I want it.”

Dew takes a deep breath in, lets that deep breath out. Nice and slow, to calm his racing heart. “You want what?”

“Your cock,” Aether says, just as Dew pushes two fingers into his twitching hole and sinks them down to the knuckle. Aether seizes up, groaning, and Dew presses on his lower back to get him nice and arched again. 

“Can’t even take my fingers,” Dew says. “How are you gonna take my cock?” He scissors his fingers a little, twisting them this way and that, probing for that spot that’ll make Aether whine so loudly Dew will finally have an excuse to gag him. 

Disappointingly, Aether doesn’t respond, just buries his face in the pillow as he rocks back onto Dew’s hand. Dew does recall telling him not to move, but Aether’s a hopeless case. 

“I’ll take it.” Aether sounds so small. “Put it in.” 

When Dew pushes in, squeezing Aether’s broad hips, Aether reaches back to wrap his hands around Dew’s thighs, like he’s trying to stop him from pulling out. Dew doesn’t know if he’s clenching on purpose, but it sure feels like it. Feels like his dick is getting a real good massage.  

“Fuckin’ relax,” he snaps. He doesn’t mean for it to come out so harsh, he swears, but it’s difficult enough to keep his composure as it is. Doesn’t help when Aether is so warm inside, so soft. 

“Dew,” Aether groans, his voice brittle. “Dew, you have to move. You have to—”

“Hold on,” Dew says through gritted teeth. “Satanas, give me a moment.”

Aether nods. His hands come up to grip his own hair, twisting and pulling at the strands. Grounding himself. Dew wishes it was his hair instead.

“You feel good,” Dew says passionately. “But you have to give me a moment, alright? You feel so good.”

“Really?” Aether mumbles, slurring, muffled by the pillow. 

Dew gives him a nice, deep thrust for good behaviour, and another to distract him from saying anything else that might make Dew finish way too early. “‘Course you do.”

Aether makes a pleased little sound. “Move?” he asks hopefully. “I’m ready.” 

Dew isn’t ready, but that’s not the point. If Aether wants, Aether gets, because Dew is weak and Aether doesn’t deserve to be denied. He grabs the soft folds of Aether’s love handles, using them as leverage to fuck into Aether as deep as he can. 

“Give me your hands,” Dew demands. 

Aether puts his hands behind his back. Perfect handholds, in Dew’s opinion. He grasps Aether’s wrists, and Aether turns his head just enough to lock eyes with him, violet on blue. “Will you give me your knot?”

Dew’s rhythm falters. 

“Aeth,” he says slowly. “You’ve never—”

“I want it,” Aether says simply. He wiggles his ass, gets Dew shifting around inside him. “Need it. Please, Dew.”

Aether wants, Aether gets. It’s not that Dew doesn’t want to. Lucifer, no. He’d be lying if he said he doesn't think about it every time Aether lets him in like this. He’s just—

“Okay,” Dew says. 

He’s just nervous. 

Dew decides, right then, that he absolutely cannot do this staring at the back of Aether’s head. Reluctantly, he pulls out, grabs one of Aether’s legs to tip him onto his side and roll him onto his back, and Aether makes the most endearing little sound when it knocks the breath out of him. 

And then it’s just Aether. Aether, staring mournfully at Dew’s burning face, stupid doe eyes making Dew’s stupid legs turn to jelly, and Dew can’t bear it anymore. He pushes Aether’s knees to his chest, slamming in and fucking him as hard and fast as he dares, the sound of skin slapping against skin bordering on obscene. 

Aether’s big hands come up to grip the sheets. “Oh, Dew,” he moans. “Dew, Dew.”

“I’m here,” Dew says hoarsely. He’s losing his mind. He’s lost it, surely. 

“Knot me,” Aether pleads. “Give it to me, I want it, I want it—” 

“Take it,” Dew grits out, fingers pressing dimples into the meat of Aether’s thighs. He doesn’t know what it sounds like on Aether’s end, but he hopes Aether doesn’t pick up on his nervousness. He can feel himself swelling up, Aether’s rim catching more and more with every thrust, until it becomes a real struggle to push in smoothly. “Take it, take all of it—” 

He fumbles to grab Aether’s dick, really just grinding into him at this point. He feels great. He can only hope Aether does too. Can only hope his knot isn’t as little as Swiss likes to bully him for. How humiliating it would be, if he knotted Aether and Aether didn’t even notice. 

“Oh, fuck,” Dew groans, as Aether squeezes impossibly hot, impossibly tight around his cock, his knot. “Squeeze it, squeeze it. Yeah—”

Aether makes a kind of garbled noise, shuddering violently. Without really thinking, Dew’s palm lands hard on his ass, and he jolts in surprise. 

“It’s so much,” he moans. “It’s so much, Dew, oh—”

“Such a slut,” Dew rasps. He reaches up to pinch Aether’s nipple, other hand holding his leg to the side, spreading him open. “Look how much of slut you are for this.” 

“For you,” Aether says immediately, voice so thick with emotion Dew can barely make out the words. 

“Only me,” Dew snarls, and Aether nods in affirmation. 

“Fill me up,” Aether pants. “Gimme it, fuck me, breed me—”

Dew can’t take it. He leans forward, sliding his hands up Aether’s sweaty body to pin his wrists to the mattress. Aether is quite a bit taller, and it’s a bit of a stretch, but Dew is nothing but if not determined. He surges up to catch Aether’s lips in a sloppy kiss, nudging with his tongue until Aether opens up for him, so he can swallow those lovely ah ah ahs that Aether won’t stop making. 

Dew cums like that, buried deep inside his favourite ghoul in the entire world. He feels it coat Aether’s insides, feels it wet his dick, and he’s always run hot, but this is scalding, burning him. 

Aether keens, tugging desperately at his own chubby cock, and Dew feels so bad for cumming before him that he reaches up to squeeze Aether’s throat, to help him along. 

“Cum,” he snarls. “Fuckin’ cum, dammit—”

And Aether wails, shooting all over his lovely tummy, into the smattering of hair on his chest. Dew looks down between them, head spinning at the way Aether’s hole swallows his knot. How it sucks him in every time he dares to pull out even a little bit. Like it never wants him to leave. 

How the fuck Aether does this is beyond him. 

“Stay,” Aether gasps, gripping his hips with bruising strength. “Oh, Dew.”

Dew closes his eyes. “Was it alright?” The question tumbles out with no filter as insecurity gets the better of him. Satan help him, if Aether says no—

“Dewdrop,” Aether says, so very affectionate. “Of course.” 

[blacklesbothatlovestowrite]

Familiar Pt. 2

CHAPTER SONG: Good Pussy Problems - Jada Kingdom

Tag list: @lppriceisright @callmewifey @briacreations96 @ilovelulu @doramilaj233 @littlebizcuit @ziayamikaelson @andibecamethestars @6-noir @s0lam33y @briacreations96 blacknthick7

-

"Jay, betta yuh did put seh yuh waan ah fiftee percent fih yuh royalties dem." (Better you did put that you want fifty percent of your royalties) Dom ran his fingers over his face, you'd both been in his living room going over the proposed contract N'Jadaka's assistant had sent.

"Mi know weh mi ah do. If mi tek a bigga cut dem nah guh waan me fih own mi masters dem." (I know what I am doing, If I take a bigger cut they won't want me to own my masters) You respond.

"Jah, yuh really ah guh tek twenty five percent fih now doh?" (You're really going to take twenty five percent for now though?) Dom hisses his teeth and you shake your head.

"Yes, Domingo." You roll your eyes, sighing in frustration. He couldn't see the bigger picture. If I owned my masters, later on I could sell my catalog for way more. "Mi haav mi yiy dem pon eh goal. Mi know weh mi ah guh do." (I have my eyes on the goal, I know what I'm going to do.)

"Wah bout yer name and merch rights?" (What about your name and merch rights) He asks, raising a brow. "It seh dem waan gi yuh twenty percent wah di rassclaat kinda deal is dat?" (It says they want to give you twenty percent what the fuck kind of deal is that?)

"I'd own my name, and be able to get 40% of the tour profits." You explain. Owning your masters and your name was the way to make money. You could get brand deals that were 100% all yours by owning your name and as far as your master's, you could sell your catalog to the highest bidder later on.

"Ah. Is yer money, mi nah guh three meds it." (It's your money, I'm not going to stress about it.) He says, handing you back your iPad.

You finished all your adjustments before sending the email back. You'd spent the two days given to read over every fine print before adding that You'd own your masters and name. You were smart, your grandma raised you. She taught you about looking out for yourself and your little brother. She'd taught you about hoe ruthless and wicked people could be over money.

You'd come from nothing and did everything you could to ensure you never were in that position again financially. You still had a long way to go before you were happy with your finances but for now you were comfortable.

"Mi ah come guh mi yaad." (I'm going to my house) You say, hugging Dom before grabbing your stuff and heading out.

_

"The sound already has 15,000 videos under it." Shuri says, as you gather your things. You'd just signed to their label, after they'd agreed with your terms for the contract.

ShuriUuu and 983,201 others liked.

UdakuRecords Welcome @Twinkle to the Udaku Family <3

RiriWi Real music, Real Girl #IDG1F

ShuriUuu They're not ready for you yet #idg1f

NjadakaU Pretty girl love money #idg1f

RamondaUdaku Welcome to the Family, can't wait to meet you.

DestinYyy How cute

The label posted a picture with you in the studio today, doing vocals for the track. The picture had went viral, several blogs and news stations picked up the story of you signing onto Udaku Records. N'Jadaka had you scheduled to do several interviews that would be released Thursday in time for the songs drop on Friday. It was Monday.

Tomorrow, and Wednesday was going to be packed. You had the interviews, and a photoshoot that all needed to be up by Thursday. They planned to break the internet Thursday before dropping your song.

So far the song was on Tiktok, Instagram reels and Youtube shorts. People were already singing the few lyrics and posting themselves to the trending song. You made several alluring videos with your best friend/hairstylist Azura filming you. Your hair had changed several times in the span of a weekend.

You'd went to your condo, where Azura filmed you in a bathing suit as you posed and made faces at the camera. Once you'd gotten the video and layered a new snippet of the song, you posted it to your Instagram.

Azuradidollie and 235,012 others liked.

Twinkle Call me what you want #idg1f

RiriWi Damn ma...

ShuriUuu God took his time with you.

Azuradidollie Whew mumma heavy, look how di gyal batty fat ehhhh? Yuh angle, triangle dat.

NJadakaU I wanna call you mine

BadGalRiri @Twinkle Caribbean girls run tings

Spiceofficial Big chuneee

chrisbrownofficial Check your dms mama

ChampagnePapi Ass on houston texas but the face look just like Claire Huxtable.

MayaBee Pretty girl

"Yuh see di amount ah celebrities inna yer comments?" (You see the amount of celebrities in your comments) Azura laughs, as you both ate fried chicken with rice and oxtail gravy.

"I know." You feel your face heat up as you shovel rice into your mouth.

"Wah Maya ah duh inna yer comments? Unnuh neva agree fi nuh comment, like or follow one anudda?" (What's Maya doing in your comments, Haven't Ya'll agreed to not comment, like or follow each other?)

"Yah ask mi? Mi nuh see nor hear from di gyal since Saturday mawning." (You're asking me? I haven't seen or heard from the girl since Saturday morning) You shrugged.

"Da gyal deh sick mi fucking tomach, mi nuh know why yuh ah pree har. She all fi har self." (That girl there sicks my fucking stomach, I don't know why you take her serious. She's all for herself.) Azura kissed her teeth as she drank her sorrel.

"Zur, mi like har. She haav sum bad ways but she's a good person." (I like her. She has some bad ways but she's a good person.) You defend her.

"Tan deh mek har tun yuh inna yamhead. Yuh coming like jelly back. Da gyal deh naav nun bout har. She don't waan yuh win, look how she did diss yuh and yuh let it go." (Stand there and make her turn you into a fool. You're weak. That girl don't have anything about her. 'worthless') Azura declares and you shake your head.

"Not too much on my girl." You cut your eyes at her and she laughs.

"Tan deh wid di likkle badmind gyal." (Stand there with the little jealous girl) Azura sticks her tongue out and you roll your eyes.

"Gweh!" (Move) You joke.

"Nyam mi front and gweh." (Eat my pussy and go away) Azura retorts, rolling her eyes and you laugh.

"Been there, done that." You wink.

A knock on your door, has you up and headed for the door. There's only three people that can come up without the front desk alerting you. One of which is here and the other was out of town. Your face set into a scowl and your nose wrinkled as you opened the door to see Maya.

"What?" You say, looking her up and down in annoyance.

"Baby, I'm sorry." Maya says and you sigh.

"Is this going to be a reoccurring thing? You being in your feelings because I'm pursuing music?" You ask. She'd walked out on Saturday upset when you told her you planned on signing onto Udaku Records. She'd tried to convince you to sign onto her label despite you having told her before it would never happen.

"It's not about the music, Jay..." Maya muttered. "I don't like Rina and it's not just about her dissing my album. She wants you, I saw how she looked at you that night at the club. Hell look at what she and that skinny giraffe are saying in your comments."

Did she really just call Shuri a giraffe? Dis girl...

"Maya, you've got to get over that. People are always going to want me. You think I don't deal with this shit with your label mates and the industry community dicks that are always aimed at you?" You hissed your teeth. "You can either choose to accept the fact that I'm yours and deal with whatever comes or we're going to have to just call it quits from now."

"You'd break up with me?" She whispers, her eyes wide and tears already starting to leak.

"Yes. I wouldn't want to but it's not fair what you're doing, you're punishing me for other people's actions. You were pissed when you hadn't heard from me Friday night but you've ignored me since Saturday morning. That's a double standard that I will not put up with." You insisted, crossing your arms as she cried. You wanted to hold her and wipe her tears away but she couldn't treat you like this and think sorry and some tears would fix things.

"Ok, I understand. I'm sorry for ignoring you and for punishing you." Maya croaked out, her voice low. You nodded.

"I forgive you." You assure her but when she moves to step forward you place your hand on her chest. "You ignored me for 2 days, now it's my turn. Talk to you Wednesday evening."

Her mouth dropped open as you closed the door in her face laughing, you always gave in to her when she acted like a spoiled brat but this time you wouldn't. She needed to tighten up and give you the same energy you gave her when it came to her career, the spotlight and the many people lusting after her.

"Yes goodie... yuh gag har backside." (Yes, beautiful. You gagged her ass) Azura was dying with laughter.

"Yuh seeh yuh..." (You see you) You shook your head before climbing back on the couch to finish your food.

You can apologize with chocolate - You 6:57 pm

Understood baby, I'll see you Wednesday. - Babes 7:00 pm

Wednesday evening. I love you spoiled brat - You 7:03pm

-

"Hi, Twinkle. It's so good to meet you! I've been obsessed with your song." Nessa says, and you smile at her.

"Thank you for having me." You say.

"So, everyone's dying to know. Who was Which Gyal meant for?" Nessa asks, and you laugh as she butchered the words in a fake patois accent.

"Just a likkle song fi any gyal weh haav mi name inna har mouth. Mi nuh inna di chattings wid people pickney so mi mek eh song fi any gyal weh waan trouble mi or has troubled mi." (Just a little song for any girl that has my name in her mouth. I'm not into the talking with people's kids, so I made the song for any girl who wants to trouble me or has troubled me.) You see she looks lost so you say everything again in english.

"You have a beautiful accent." Nessa compliments and you thank her. "You recently signed on to Udaku Records and have been teasing a song. Idg1f. Can you tell us what inspired the song?"

"Well I had the lyrics in my head and a little melody. I've had so many people come at me crazy because I was in a very public relationship almost 2 years ago. I've said before and I'll stand on it, I love money and anyone who wants to give me money can definitely do it. I'm a pretty girl, I know what I deserve and that's how I've made a living just being pretty." You explained and Nessa raised a brow.

"You were with Chris Brown, no?" Nessa asks coyly, and you roll your eyes playfully.

"Yes, I was. However he's irrelevant now." You reply with a shrug.

"Many people speculated Which Gyal was about Ri, are you and Rihanna cool now?" Nessa asks and I shake my head.

"I barely know her personally. We never had any problems, so I don't know where that narrative came from." You answer, honestly. "I love her, she's so creative and multifaceted. There's nothing but respect for her."

"We all saw Drake and Chris in your comments. How do you feel about that?" Nessa questions.

"No disrespect to Drake but he's too corny for me personally. I can't get with his antics and as far as Chris, well he knows what's up. That's it." You lick your lips.

"Rihanna was also in your comments, giving you a stamp of approval." Nessa continues. "What do you think of that?"

"As I said before, I have the utmost respect for Rihanna. She's an icon, I look up to her. She's paved the way for Caribbean girls and I can only hope that I make her proud." You felt conflicted because while you grew up liking Rihanna, you knew she could be very shady. She'd never spoke on you before besides saying you were a non factor when asked in an interview when you and Chris were dating.

The rest of the interview goes pretty smooth. Towards the end as Nessa's closing out her producer comes over and shows her something on his phone. Nessa looks from the phone to you before nodding at whatever the producer says. He walks off camera and Nessa looks at you again.

"So what do you have to say about Maya posting you on her social media?" Nessa inquires and you stare at her in shock .

"We're cool, so--"

On the screen in between Nessa and I on the wall is Maya's latest post and you blink as you see it.

Kyliebabe and 1,249,865 others liked.

Mayabee I love you, baby. You are my sunshine. @Twinkle

Azuradidollie dutty tinkin gyal, weh di fuck yuh ah post mi bomboclaat fren fah? yuh is ah waste gyal fi tru, only batty bwoy do dem tings deh.

You can't find anything to say as you stare at the screen in shock. She hadn't even discussed this with you before she went ahead and posted that. You were angry beyond words.

"Still cool?" Nessa laughs, and you narrow your eyes at her. You took a deep breath to calm yourself before releasing it.

"No. We're not cool at all." You say, taking the ear piece off and tossing it down before grabbing your bag and walking out.

-

You had finished the rest of your interviews in autopilot. Your energy was faked, you felt betrayed by Maya. This wasn't the actions of someone who cared about you, this was a calculated move that you were sure was brought on by her label and manager.

All the time spent hiding and keeping you a dirty secret just for her to out your relationship the moment you were finally getting attention on you for the right reasons was sickening. You'd never pressured her or argued when she chose to follow her label and manager's decision to keep your relationship quiet.

You were supportive and you put her career and goals first. Any other time this would have been what you wanted but right now you felt used and like a prop. You blocked her number and blocked her on all your social media's, not caring to hear what she had to say.

Over and over she'd shown time and time again you were not on the list of her priorities. You could argue away most of her bad habits and bad ways but this. There was no excusing this. You couldn't defend it because there was nothing that she could say that would make you feel even remotely ok about any of this.

Today was your photoshoot and you were numbing yourself to the hurt you felt. All the excitement dying down at things that should have been making you happy. You'd never dreamed of being in the position you were in and your joy was being stolen.

"What do you think about this, Jay?" Shuri asks as you, Riri and N'Jadaka are looking over the edits. The picture they all seemed to settle on was sexy yet cutesy. You had a huge bouquet in your arms, while posing in the gold sparkly dress Azura had helped you pick. Your tattoos were showcased in a very peekaboo way whilst the rest of your body was covered.

"It looks good." You agree, your tone giving off a 'whatever' kind of vibe.

"Alright, we'll use it as the cover to idg1f." N'Jadaka says. "It really matches the vibe of the song. Gotta give it to you Shuri, your vision is immaculate."

"It's all dependent on the artist." Shuri shrugged, looking at you with a small smile. You returned it though your smile didn't meet your eyes.

"You've been working your ass off ma." Riri agrees, looking from Shuri to you. "You've been locked in ever since the first day in the studio."

"I'm glad ya'll feel that way." You feel your cheeks warm, and you look down at your hands.

"I have a meeting but I just wanted to stop by and say that you're doing great, Jay." N'Jadaka adds, before reaching over to hug you. He dabs up Shuri and Riri before leaving.

"You hungry, Ma?" Riri inquires, she knew you weren't feeling like yourself. She and Shuri talked amongst themselves about taking you out to cheer you up.

"Afta mi belly naav nuh bottom." (After my belly has no bottom 'greedy') You laugh, before nodding.

"Alright, why don't you get changed and we'll take you out. You deserve to be celebrated. You've signed to our label, your about to release a single that millions are anticipating and you've been kept busy this whole week with promo shit." Shuri asserts, licking her lip. "Pick whatever outfit you want."

-

🎶 You must be stupid, don't even flirt with me, what you doing mi nuh interested, keep it pushing, come outta mi face and give me some space. You likkle bit too nuff yute don't chat to me, A wha so? Don't make your friend dem gas you, cause this is a brand new moto 🎶

Azuradidollie and 644,431 others liked.

Twinkle You must be stupid, don't even flirt with me, what you doing mi nuh interested, keep it pushing, come outta mi face and give me some space. You likkle bit too nuff yute don't chat to me. #Single #idg1f

Azuradidollie Yes babes, mek di waste gyal know wah gwaan #idg1f

513 comments, 23,491 likes.

ShuriUuu You free fi carry me out #idg1f

985 comments, 67,203 likes.

RiriWi Give me money and buy me stuff #idg1f

678 comments, 52,465 likes.

chrisbrownofficial she like eating pussy, I'm like me too 😉

User Ariana what are you doing here?

1,252 comments, 101,230 likes.

Mayabee Jay, don't play with me.

User Girl go sit down and nurse your heart burn

1,190 comments, 141,234 likes.

Kyliebabe Single but was just fucking on oh.... ok

Azuradidollie @Kyliebabe Ah yuh ah nyam har front?

User Why are you so pressed? your friend caused the drama babes.

791 comments, 62,123 likes.

Shuri and Riri took you shopping to celebrate your newest achievements, before finally taking you to dinner. You'd had the wig taken off your head, and was wearing your hair out in a wavy silk press. Makeup free and natural, save for lipgloss and your lash extensions.

You posted the video Riri recorded of you walking, and twirling and posing to the lyrics of your song that you knew would hit Maya deep in the gut. You put the lyrics in the caption before using the hashtag single to make a statement as you had no interest in her, her label or her manager using you.

You put your phone on DND, as you ate your sushi and pasta. Throughout the dinner, the conversation was light. You all exchanged information about yourselves, favorite colors, music, artists, hobbies, goals, etc.

You found out that Shuri could play several instruments, and write her own music. The latter wasn't a shock as she had tons of writing credits. She wrote songs on the daily just by living and watching, she was beyond talented.

Riri could play the electric guitar, and was amazing at putting together beats. She could hear music in her head as she went about her day, and was always recording a melody that she had stuck in her head. You could see similarities in yourself and the both of them.

"What made you want to co-head the label?" You ask Shuri. Her family's music business venture was years old but you saw a significant change once she and N'Jadaka stepped up to be the new faces of the label.

Riri and Shuri shared a look, before Shuri looked at you. Her jaw was clenched and her body was tense. You could tell there was something there.

"Riri and I are together but at one point we had a third." Shuri explains which is no surprise to you. You figured they were together, everyone speculated but they had never confirmed. "Destiny's an artist on the label, I was only into producing when we got together but when I seen just how shitty a lot of artist's deals were, including hers... I chose to do something about it, it was shortly after my father and brother died that I pushed for N'Jadaka to head the label while I worked beside him. We worked to give our artists better deals than they'd previously had, whilst working to ensure the company was still making money."

"I worked tirelessly to give Destiny everything she wanted, because I saw how stressed she was not having creative control and being forced into the bullshit the label pushed on her. My father and T'Challa agreed that our relationship should be kept quiet as Destiny was a sex symbol and was more profitable and marketable as a single straight woman." Shuri rolls her eyes.

"After the accident, I finally had the chance to change the direction of the company to what I'd had in mind. However, I soon realized Destiny was only using Riri and I. The moment she had a better contract, she left us to be the industry mattress." Shuri laughs to herself.

"Why aren't you and Riri public now?" You ask, curious. They no longer had a reason to keep their relationship silent.

"The gag is we are. We're private not secret. We post each other, we're out and about with each other. We've just never addressed anything because we feel no need to. Everyone knows what's up with us." Riri declares, looking at you with a small smirk.

"That makes sense. Social media can be just as destructive as it is beneficial. Especially to relationships." You agreed.

"I take it you and Maya are no longer friends? " Riri raises a brow as she looks you over.

"No, we are not." You shrug, rolling your eyes at the mention of the girl. Azura was right, and you saw that clear as day.

"So, you're a free agent." Shuri watches you through hooded eyes, as she sips on her bourbon.

"Why do you want to know?" You look at her with a wide smile on your face daring her to be bold.

"Just want confirmation that you're free before we have you coming all night. Not that you being in a relationship would have stopped the pursuit." Shuri's lips turn up as she watches your body flush at her words.

"Yuh think one dinna and ah likkle shopping can lock me dung?" (You think one dinner and a little shopping can lock me down?) You giggle as you sip on your lemon water.

"Definitely not." Riri denies, as she waves over the waiter to clear the table and bring the check.

"However we all know at some point you will be on your back with your legs spread open and your mouth wide as we work your fat pussy over." Shuri says and you clench as her words heat up your core. She used patois to say 'Fat pussy' and that had you feeling hot all over.

"Mmm mmm girl." You shake your head, giggling. "Yuh haffi work fi mi tight ole." (You have to work for my tight hole.)

"So, this is what working looks like. Now it's making sense why you were so pressed to work with Rina." You see Maya approaching behind the duo and your face drops as she opens her mouth.

"What are you even...." Your words fall off as you realize she still had your location on her iPad. You unlock your phone to remove her iPad and block it before locking your phone again. "What do you want?"

"Why the fuck are you out here acting like a whore when you have a whole girlfriend?" Maya exclaims.

"Whore? My girl outta di two ah wi? who ah whore? cuz mi know seh my pussy nuh haav more den 5 bodies pon ih." (My girl, out of the two of us, who's the whore? Cause I know that my pussy has no more than five bodies on it.) You match her tone.

"Mi neva yet disrespect yuh ar mek nubodi disrespect yuh yet, so don't ever innah yer life try diss me ar mi pussy." (I have never disrespected you or let anyone disrespect you so don't ever in your life diss me or my pussy.) You hiss.

"Why are you treating me like this?" Maya starts with her bag of crying and for once you feel nothing as the tears roll down her face. She can't cry and think she'll get her way.

"You called me a whore." You kiss your teeth. "That is not the words of someone who loves me or even cares about me. You'd think with all the slut shaming you and I have both endured, that word would have never left your mouth."

"I'm sorry." Maya cried. "I didn't mean to say that, I was just angry. I love you so much, Jay. I would never purposely hurt you, you know that."

"Disrespecting me and using me as a prop for your career wasn't you hurting me?" You scoffed.

"I didn't." Maya swears and you swallow as you see the look in her eyes. "I swear to you, I did not. My manager made the post on my page, I didn't know until after it happened. I would never use you in that way, you know I wouldn't."

"Maya, I love you." You see both Shuri and Riri share a look out of the corner of your eye but you keep your eyes trained on Maya. "I love you so much that I put you and your wants over my own. I let myself down to lift you up. If I'm being honest I overlooked the shitty things you'd do or say because I was that in love with you. But love should never feel like that, at least not the love I want. You're a good person, I genuinely believe that but you just aren't good enough for me. I deserve more, I deserve better. You've said sorry just about almost every day we've been together and yet you continue doing the same stuff you know hurt me. I'm putting myself first for once, and if that makes me a whore or selfish, or anything you want to call me that's fine because I've come to terms with the fact we aren't right for each other."

"Don't do this, Jay... I'll be better, I promise." Maya's face was pale as she cried. You felt embarrassed for her as everyone in the outside area was staring, cameras were flashing and you knew people were recording.

"I'll text you later." You sighed, before grabbing your purse and walking towards Maya. You wipe her tears and grab her hand, leading her away from the attention and cameras.

-

What do you guys think? Let me know below <3

[hearts401]

not an ask. I just simply want to say how absolutely utterly fucking HAPPY I AM HOLY CRAP!!!!!,!! I watched this guy for four and a half years and he turned out to be a horrible person, so for quite a while I’ve been reading and watching anything I can to fill in the place for “what to get attached to for years again but still watch other things and get attached it’s just this one is always lurking no matter what my Brian will go back to them” and the unwanteds just so happen to be that. Surprise surprise Aaron just so happens to fit the closest out of literally everything I’ve watched and read (even the old four and a half year guy)- to the little personality that my brain has just consumed and placed onto my favourite character but like not actually ther all different but GUH whatever. That doesn’t matter I just can’t not over explain my self and it horrible because I explain myself horribly. Main point is I always get attached to one character and I love them so so much and they never leave my brain ever and Aaron actually just won’t go away. Every now and then I’d come back to loook at the tags here and see the same stuff again and believe me I was grateful for there being anything at all BUT OH MY GOSH!,!, YOU, YOU LITERAL ANGEL, HAVE BLESSED MY ENTIRE SOUL TODAY!!,!! I CAME HERE JUST TO LOOK AT THE SAME THINGS AGAIN TODAY AND YKNOW WHAT I SEE?? THE MOST GORGEOUS ART OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTER OVER AND OVER AGAIN WITHOTHER CHARACTERS WHO I ALSO REALLY LOVE AND I ALSO JUST REALLY LOVE THE RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS SO I ALWAYS SEARCH UP MY FAVORITE CHARACTER AND THEN SIME OTHER CHRACWTRE,,,, AND OBVIOSULY THAT DOESNT WORK TOO WELL WHEN THERES BASICALLY NO FANDOM, BUT AHHHHH!,! LIAM, EVA, PANTHER???? IM LITERALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU. Every time I scroll down I see another one of your arts and I just have to stare for five minutes, AND THEN THERES JSUT MORE!!! IVE ACTUALLY ENTERED HEAVEN AND YOU ARE THE GOD 🥹🥹🥹 anyways sorry if this is weird or anything lmao im just really happy and I can’t word correctly. Recently it’s been a lot asker to get over my fear of talking to others just to say they’re really cool or pretty (even though I’m still super scared) but this has made me so excited I just had to tell the amazing artist who did it GAHHHHH YOU ARE SO AWESOME AND COOL THANK YOU!!!

THIS MADE MY DAY HELLO???? IMGGFJ IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY STUFF SM OMGHGHG IM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT THESE GUYS ITS AGHHG

im also super passionate abt how my favs interact with others ughhgguhfrrgr but theres very little liam and eva content i just had to draw them!!! I ALSO FEEL YOU SO BAD??? ITS SOOO HARD TO FIND CONTENT OF SMALL FANDOMS THAT FITS MY NICHE LITTLE BOX. I LIKE THE UNDERRATED INSIDE THE UNDERRATED 😭😭😭 WHICH IS WHY I LIKE TO MAKE A LOT OF MY OWN CONTENT!!!

I'm actually so happy im smiling os hard over this messagefdhdf i'll draw more of them soon just for you!!!

[ultimateluckystudent-writes]

You Suck (So Passionately)

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Komaeda and Reserve Course!Reader can't stay away and can't stand each other, so he gives you something to think of him by when you leave. Everybody wins and loses in this game of cat-and-mouse.

Or, in which the idea of hate-sex with Komaeda is rotting the author's brain.

Word Count: 4.5k

Content Warnings: Hate Sex, Power Dynamics, Under-Negotiated Kink, Dom/Sub Dynamics, Heavy Themes of BDSM, Degradation, Insults, Humiliation, Slightly Possessive Behavior, Unhealthy Relationship, Use of Vibrators in Public, Semi-Public Sex, She/Her Pronouns for Reader When Applicable, Female Reader

General Tags/Themes: Brat!Reader, Brat Tamer!Komaeda, Reserve Course!Reader, Masochism, Sadism, Classroom Sex, Seriously He's Mean in This One, Orgasm Delay/Denial

A/N: I have.... two other wips of Reserve Course Reader and Komaeda... I'm trying to fit them into a Reserve Course Cinematic Universe, so I may add more chapters to this but it works as a stand alone, but I'll update it if they see the light of day <3

READ ON AO3

“Listen, uh, can we like… speed this thing up?”

Nagito paused mid-thrust.

“What?” He fixed you with the look he gave you every time you did something as stupid as he thought you were.

“It’s just that I have-” You interrupted yourself with a yawn. You really had no idea why you let him drag you out of bed so early in the morning when he demanded you come back to his room again basically every afternoon anyways.  “I have class in twenty, and I can’t-” He just laughed like you made a joke, then continued to fuck you at the same pace. Perhaps even slower, actually, and deep enough to elicit a squeak from your mouth at the sudden feeling.

“Are you seriously asking me for something for your pathetic excuse for classes?” He scoffed. “What does it matter if you miss ten minutes? Or thirty for that matter? What separates any of you from useless, normal, high school dropouts but the pity this school takes on you?” He purred the words like dirty talk, and if you didn’t find that so alluring, you certainly wouldn’t have been doing this- whatever this was between you and Nagito- for as long as you had.

“I hate your fucking guh- ah-” His teeth sunk into you, sending your nails into the skin of his back. You could feel his sharp smirk curled around your collarbone.

“What was that? I couldn’t quite make it out.”

“God, you’d fuck so much better if you stopped talking.” You growled. The smirk tensed just a bit into a sneer. Unfortunately for you, instead of making him speed up like you’d hoped, he only slowed more. You groaned in disappointment, both from your worry about the clock, and the loss of sensation.

“You won’t be able to trick me. Nothing scum like you could come up with could fool me. I’ll take my time with you how I’d like, just how I always do.” The slow drag of him, in and out, was like torture. You could do nothing but wrap your legs around him tighter, fruitlessly, and look up into his stupid, smug face. “In fact, I think you might actually be more useful as an Ultimate’s toy instead of sitting in your play-pretend classes.” He practically giggled. You couldn’t help but moan at the title, which he more than noticed. “See, doll? I think you agree.” He continued his pace, picking apart the threads keeping you together with each movement of his hips.

By the time you had both finished, you already knew you were going to be late for class. You let yourself take the smallest breather before stumbling up and pulling on your clothes. He’d thrown them around the room like he was trying to make it difficult for you. He simply watched you, drumming his fingers over the spot on the bed where you had just been, that infuriating look on his face you knew meant he had something planned. You pretended not to notice as you moved towards the door.

“Okay, later-”

“Wait.” He ordered. Your hand was on the doorknob. You grit your teeth. You knew he had waited for the very last minute just to fuck with you.

“What, Komaeda?” You turned around, glaring openly at him. “I need to go-”

“I know.” He sat up and began casually looking through his bedside drawer. It wouldn’t have surprised you if he’d begun to hum a tune to himself. Right as you opened your mouth, he pulled something out. It was a small, pink device made of silicone-

“No.” You said at once, shaking your head fervently. “No, no, no, no, no-”

“Put it on.” He said simply, holding it out for you to take. His tone was so serious that you almost obliged.

“Why? I would just leave it off anyways.”

“Do you ever feel ashamed about the questions you ask?” He cocked his head. For a split second, you almost thought it wasn’t a rhetorical question, only embarrassing you further. “Obviously I can control it. I’m not giving you something just because I think you’ll miss me. Now go on.” You glared at him, unmoving. He met your eye, as calm as ever. As always, this was a battle of wills. 

As always, Nagito won.

*****

“(L/N)-san, this is the second time this week you are more than fifteen minutes late to class.” Everybody in the room had their eyes on you. ‘God he should have just taped a ‘kick me’ sign to me. It would have been less fucking embarassing.’ “I’m afraid you know the policy. That’s detention tonight.” Your homeroom teacher frowned at you. You took the detention slip she wrote you without a word and took your seat with your eyes pointed towards the ground. As you sat there, book cracked open and immediately zoning out, you felt your anger grow towards Nagito instead of inwards.

‘That fucking freak. Getting me detention just to stick this thing in my panties.’ You felt much warmer than usual. In your panties was the small vibrator he had eventually coaxed on you in your effort to minimize your tardiness. ‘There’s no way he’d actually do it, right? It wouldn’t be fun to mess with me if he can’t even see it.’

Despite that, you could still feel it pressing against your most sensitive spots the entire day, shifting when you fidgeted, moving as you walked. You felt as though everybody must have been able to see how hard you were blushing, but not even your friends said anything. Besides that, you waited all day with baited breath and a hand ready to shoot up and loudly announce you had to go to the bathroom. You thought of at least six different excuses, each worst than the last, just to cover the potentially loud buzz of the device. By mid-day, you knew you had soaked through your panties, and you were terrified it was going to slip right out and onto the floor with how wet you were. But the clip held up, only to torment you some more.

When the last bell rung, you were the first out the door.

‘Just detention left, just detention left, just detention left and then I can go to the restroom, mop up, and go home.’ As you hurried over, your phone buzzed. It was a text from Nagito, as curt and demanding as it always was.

‘My room. 30.’

You snorted as you tapped out a response.

‘Yeah, no. Some asshole caused me to be late again today, which means I’ve got detention. Nice work, idiot. By the way, I think your stupid toy is broken. I didn’t feel anything all day. You’ll have to find another way to mess with me.’ 

‘What makes you think that I’d turned it on yet?’

“Cell-phone in the bin, please, ma’am.” A sunny, orange-hair woman who barely looked old enough to be out of the Academy herself said. It snapped you out of the slight sense of dread and shame as you read the text. You shook your head and obliged. You didn’t recognize her, or know what she was doing here. Usually, your homeroom teacher was the one who ran detention. As if she were reading your mind, she said, “I’m filling in for the usual teacher. I’m Yukizome-sensei. Please, take your seat and sit quietly or do some work.” You glanced around. A couple of other kids were already there too, most of them with their heads down. You weren’t usually allowed to sleep through detention. You decided this was a stroke of luck. You gave her a polite smile and gave her your slip, watching as she checked you off of a list. You sat down, glancing at the clock.

In your haste and smugness, you didn’t even think about removing the vibrator before you left, so it sat there as a firm reminder of the temper you’d surely be met with when you responded to Nagito. For the moment, however, you took off your blazer and arranged it into a sort of pillow, getting comfortable when-

“Ah, hello, Yukizome-sensei!”

‘No fucking way.’

“Komaeda-kun! Good afternoon, what are you doing here? Did you manage to get yourself detention somehow?” She seemed to be jokingly scolding him, but you knew it was only kind of a joke. The sweet smile on Nagito’s face was foreign to you. He floated in like he didn’t have a care in the world. You noticed that his hand was bandaged, and that it hadn’t been this morning. ‘Serves him right. What the fuck is he doing here?’

“Oh, no, I simply saw you as I was passing by on my way out. I didn’t know you ran detention.” He took the opportunity to glance out across the classroom. Nobody else seemed to care about what was happening up front. He met your eye for just a second too long, inscruitable, before turning right back to her. You did your best to act normal, knowing full well he was merely there to taunt you.

“Not usually- I’m filling in for another teacher. If you’re just here to chat Komaeda-kun, why don’t you come see me before class tomorrow-”

“Well, actually, I went to your classroom to see if you could help me out with some work I got today, but you weren’t there. I seem to have lucked in and caught you here! Would it be alright if we go over it for just a few minutes?” His smile was angelic, wholly innocent. You almost couldn’t believe that the sadistic man who’d once made you grovel and kiss his shoes just for kicks. Not that you hadn’t enjoyed that. You wondered what that smile would have looked like from that lowly angle-

“Of course! That’s no problem at all.” Yukizome said, making the pit of nerves in your stomach knot further. You didn’t know what Nagito had planned, but he always had something planned. You knew trying to sleep was a waste. You huffed a defeated sigh and pulled out one of your textbooks to begin working, doing your best to tune out the voice you could pick out of a crowd talking about algebra like he would anywhere else.

As you’d finally become a bit successful in your offer, your panties began to buzz.

At first, you were more alarmed than aroused. It was a strange sensation, and you almost couldn’t stop yourself from looking around to see if anyone had noticed, but you were rows away in every direction from the nearest person, and they were sleeping. You drummed your fingers on the desk. 

‘Okay. Okay. If I just… just shift this way, I can’t feel it as much-’ Right as you adjusted yourself, trying to move it away from your clit, but you jumped as the vibration increased and it backfired. You let out a small squeak, causing Yukizome’s eyes to drift over to you for just a second. Next to hers, a pair of cold, green, grey eyes lingered on you. You couldn’t tell if you imagined his smile being more predatory than before. 

‘This is fine, this is fine, I can just- I can just-’ But no matter how you moved, it was simply too much. Your insides twisted with the fear of your peers noticing, yes, but knowing that Nagito was here to watch you front and center was nerve-wracking. ‘That fucking sicko! He planned this all! He fucking knew! I’m gonna gut that twink like a god damn fish hnngahh-’ All of your thoughts short circuited as Nagito began a different pattern. You looked up, you had to know how he was doing this. In his hand was a small, pink remote. In the other, he pointed at something at the page and asked Yukizome a question.

And the truth was, you wanted him to watch you keep your composure. You hoped it would spite him. You grit your teeth together and tried even harder to focus on your work. You could tell by the way he simply kept clicking the speed up and up. You eventually had to bite down on your book, giving up on the pretense of work and now simply trying not to let your eyes roll up and into the back of your head.

The feeling was building and building, and truly nobody but you and Nagito seemed any the wiser. You were at the back of the room, and you’d kept pretty quiet so far. You began to consider letting yourself cum from this, and it only became more and more appealing of an idea as he toyed with you.

It seemed like he could tell exactly when you wanted to let your dignity falter and considered letting him win. He raised and lowered the speeds accordingly, keeping you on the brink, frustrating as always. But part of you didn’t even mind. You knew you could keep up the silence like this for the rest of the period, as exhausting as it would be. What you didn’t know was if you could when you came.

Still, every time you approached the brink, you got closer and closer to teetering off the edge, and soon you were barely even considering the consequences. Per usual, Nagito took cat and mouse to a whole new level. He batted you around until you were limp, helpless in his hands, though he always found the fight you put up entertaining. You could almost hear the annoying monologue he would surely give you if he ever heard you thinking like that.

‘And just like in the metaphor, the cat is simply stronger than the mouse. Everyone knows it will win in the end. And frankly, it’s almost sad it would struggle in the first place-’

“(L/N)-san? Um, are you feeling alright, dear?” Yukizome-sensei was looking right at you. You realized you’d been practically panting, red-faced and almost sweating. You couldn’t even imagine the picture you must have made. You couldn’t even look at Nagito.

“Ye- Yeah, I’m-” You croaked, your mouth dry.

“You look feverish. Come here, let me feel your forehead.” She waved you up. You felt your eyes widen in fear before you could cover it. Nagito did absolutely nothing about the vibrations. You shook your way to your feet and miraculously began to walk towards her. “Oh dear, does your stomach hurt?” Yukizome was clearly fretting now. She looked down at your hands, which were clutched over your stomach. It was completely subconscious, but hey, whatever you could work.

“Yeah.” You nodded quickly. You leaned over her desk to let her feel your forehead. Nagito’s eyes were boring into you, as palpable as Yukizome’s cool hand, but you completely ignored her.

“You’re really warm.” She confirmed. The laugh that escaped Nagito made you want to melt into a puddle, and your lower half seemed to have caught the memo. “Why don’t you go to the nurse’s office?”

“What?” Nagito scoffed at once. He gave you a quick once over. “She’s clearly just another Reserve Course making a pathetic attempt to fake her way out of detention.”

“Komaeda-kun!” Yukizome scolded. “Your Reserve Course peers are just as much a part of the school as you are.”

“Just as much a part of the school’s budget, perhaps.” He muttered quietly.

“Alright then, why don’t you escort her to the Nurse’s Office and make sure she makes it there?” Nagito opened his mouth. In that brief instance, your eyes met. A silent conversation was had. Your stomach twisted and turned into knots just looking at him, but maybe that was the toy too.

“Yes, Yukizome-sensei. Thank you for all your help.” He finally relented. He began to pack his work up slowly, and with a dramatic sigh. “Come on then.” He nodded towards the door. You stumbled out after him.

He said nothing as you walked into the hallway. You felt both more and less worried about being too obvious here next to him. He didn’t adjust the speed. However, he was walking slowly as you neared the end of the hallway, letting you catch up.

As soon as you turned the corner, however, he grabbed you by the wrist and pulled you away. You stifled a groan as he practically hauled you into the nearest empty classroom. He locked the door behind him.

“Woah, Ultimate classrooms lock?” You couldn’t help but look around in awe. He laughed, like he always did. It’d slipped out before you thought about it.

“This is a lab. Of course it locks.” He rolled his eyes. “God, you worms really don’t know anything about what it’s like not to crawl.” Even if you’d known nothing about him, the way he licked his lips with that glint in his eyes would have given away his perverted enjoyment. He wasted no more time, taking quick, sure strides to you and pressing you into the desk behind you so hard your back bent as you tilt yourself to meet his lips. The moans you’d been holding back came out in an embarrassing, guttural noise.You wrapped your legs around his waist, sliding back and sitting on the table.

His hands roamed over your body, groping you forcefully. His tongue found its way into your mouth with no hesitance. You couldn’t help but give into him. It seemed as though he was so sure that you were simply his, and he always had been.

“Turn around.” He ordered, like he wasn’t already moving your hips into the position that suited him best. You let him flip you over and push you onto the desk, hissing in pain. His hands quickly found their way under your skirt and under your panties. Things always moved quickly between the two of you, and today seemed to be the most rushed of all. Nagito finally, finally turned the vibrator off, pulling it from your panties with a wet noise. 

“Look at this-” He laughed, breathless as he held it up between his fingers right in front of your face. It shone in the sunset pouring through the windows. It would have been oddly beautiful if it weren’t just a luridly pink way for Nagito to fuck with you. You turned your head away, blatantly and needlessly disobeying him. He seemed less than impressed. He took your cheeks with the hand not holding the toy and angled your face towards him. It was a strain on your neck, but he just smiled at you. You hated that you had long since been able to determine what most of Nagito’s smiles meant. “If you don’t want this, then I suppose I could take it and leave.” 

“...then I guess you can stay.” Your words didn’t come out with nearly as much force as you wanted them to. His expression didn’t change. He simply made a soft noise of agreement, put the toy down on the desk carelessly on the desk, and plunged two fingers within you all at once. You practically shrieked, clutching onto the edges of the table with your nails.

“Ahaha… you’re dripping. I can feel it all the way down your thighs.” He purred. “I honestly didn’t even expect you to keep it in for a class, much less through the entire day.” He began to fuck his fingers in and out of you at a lazy, uncaring pace. You could barely focus on what he said. You’d covered up all day, and you simply didn’t have the energy to anymore. You could feel just how deep you needed him at the moment, and it had long since gotten uncomfortable. You shamelessly rocked your hips against his long fingers, hoping you could do it yourself if he wouldn’t. “Look at you! You’re even more desperate than usual. I’m sure you could have thrown yourself at any of those boys in your class.” He sneered, his pace quickening, as if it was your fault his imagination had angered him. Regardless, it was a welcome side effect. “I’ve seen the way they leer at women- at you- and you were so wet I think I could smell it-” 

“Shut up.” You whined, pressing your hips even more insistently against him. “God, you say such embarrassing shit!” You hissed, and if you weren’t already flushed, you likely would have gone red from just the way Nagito had phrased it.

“Shut up?” He repeated, tone even. His fingers completely stilled, just an inch of their tips still inside of you. You squeezed around them, bemoaning the loss. “Alright then, speak.” He grabbed ahold of your hair and pulled you up by the painful grip so his mouth was right by your ear. “I know you’re not above fucking in bathrooms and classrooms and even outside- so why not take one of them?”

You knew what he wanted. That was the only thing that made this violate, almost hateful thing between the two of you work. You always knew what he wanted, and he knew the same for you. You’d gravitated towards each other like the first look was a shared, whispered confession.

“I’m not interested in any of them.” You denied it to him. His grip on your hair tightened. The noise from your throat was frustrated, pained, and deeply aroused.

“Ah, no one from the class of rejects was interesting enough for you? Shocking.” His laughter was cold and mocking, the outburst of sound almost loud enough to be painful right by your ear. “But you don’t exactly show a propensity for interesting conversation, yourself.” He taunted. His hand slipped out of you, but around immediately to roughly grope one of your breasts. After only a moment, he slid it under your shirt and pulled down your bra. His fingers circled your nipples gently at first, which still threatened to cause your knees to give out on your over-stimulated body, but that only lasted a moment, too. He pinched and tugged, making you gasp and press your chest further into his hand. In that moment, he sank his teeth into the new bit of neck you’d just exposed as if he knew exactly how you’d react.

“You’ll leave marks-”

“What does it matter?” He cooed. “No one you’re interested in, right?” He licked the whole way up your neck and ear with the flat of his tongue, a warm, slimy feeling accompanying the filthy action. Despite that, you couldn’t help but want to get even closer to him, to feel that tongue over any inch of your body you could get it-

“Komaeda,” You grabbed at any piece of clothing you could reach behind you. “Komaeda.” You pleaded.

“Hmm?”

“I- I-” You knew exactly what he wanted to hear. You knew what he wanted. Always. “I don’t want them, I don’t want any Reserve Course guy-”

“Of course you don’t, who would?”

“No, no, I- I don’t want any Ultimate either.” The two of you had begun grinding against each other. You could feel his hard-on through all of your clothes. He was panting and moaning softly in your ear as you spoke. “Fuck, I- I want you, nobody else can- god, I want the way you fucking wreck me-”

There was a split second of unfastening and tugging and then-

“FUCK!” You shouted, making Nagito immediately clap a hand around your mouth at the reaction to his first brutal, perfect thrust. But even if he had had the capacity to scold you, you certainly didn’t have it to listen. Instead, you moaned unabashedly, though muffled by him, and spread your legs even wider. You wrapped your foot around the back of one of his calves and he set a pace that began to rock the desk with each thrust. You could do nothing but hold on as he gave as much as he got.

“Yes, yes, yes, my perfect, reprehensible pet,” Nagito babbled to his captive audience. His blazer had long since begun to slip off of his shoulders, and now he let it fall onto the floor. The sound of his hips hitting yours is almost louder than his voice. “You’re mine, you’re mine-” Even as you were connected intimately, he grabbed and squeezed whatever his wandering hands fell upon. “Mine to use, mine to make beg- they’re going to see your marks and know you belong to someone and not know who- like,” His crazed giggling broke his words apart. “Like some sort of stray with a collar!” He was laughing at you once more, but it felt only like another one of the overwhelming sensations about to make you cum. He grabbed your leg and put it on the desk as well, only going deeper within you. On the most lovely side of painful, he took you apart. Your mind blanked save for the feeling of his hands, his breath, his warmth against you-

With you tensing around him, he followed shortly after, his own moan unfettered by anything. The first thing you took note of was when you snapped out of your daze was the feeling of his cum inside of you. You were still too far gone to do much but moan, however, and slump onto the desk completely. Neither of you said anything when Nagito did the same, pressed up against and inside of you.

Deep cutting insults, praise that had been twisted and perverted, even the necessary intimacy for sex were easy for the two of you. The conversation that followed never was. More often than not, you gave up on it, letting the ringing in your ears speak for itself as you fixed yourselves to go back out to the world.

“Hey, um, where should…” You trailed off, holding up the toy. Nagito took it and stowed it away in his pocket. 

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

Silence lingered on, and so did the two of you. You’d never admit it, but you always put on your clothes slower than usual when it was time for you to leave Nagito. To say you enjoyed his company was still a bit of a stretch, but right after you parted, the space around you always seemed so much more… empty. For a split second, your mind conjured an image of walking out holding hands, of going to grab dinner together-

“See you.” You said instead, shrugging your backpack over your shoulder, composed as you could while dismissing the man whose cum was still inside of you. He barely acknowledged you, a small nod and a twitch of the hand. You slipped out from the classroom, refusing to look back as you hurried your way down the dark, empty hallway.

[buckyismybicycle]

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers Rating: Explicit Tags/Warnings: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurities, Body Image Issues, References to Depression/Anxiety/Eating Disorders/Alcohol Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Alternate Universe - No Powers/Hockey, Team Bonding, Slow Burn, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Top Bucky Barnes, Pining, Idiots in Love, Miscommunications, Requited Unrequited Love, Slight Jealousy

<< Previous Chapter | Series Masterpost | Overall Masterpost

Steve

Steve feels like he’s perpetually on the roller coaster that is Bucky Barnes. He feels, more than he ever has before – the disappointment, the joy, the hurt, the love. It’s all there, constantly up and down as he tries to buckle in and hang on.

He hadn’t been able to bring himself to ask when he got to Bucky’s. The sheer sadness radiating off of Bucky was enough to make Steve forget his questions entirely. There was only one question that mattered anymore: is Bucky okay?

He knew the answer was no, but it didn’t stop him from caving the moment Bucky’s lips touched his. He knew the answer was no, because Bucky was relentless in his kisses and demanding in a way Steve’s never experienced. It was good. Better than good. Steve felt guilty about it, that’s how good it was.

“Tell me, Stevie – what have you always wanted and never tried, huh?”

Steve flushes immediately at the hunger in Bucky’s eyes, and the low tone of his question.

“I… don’t know?”

“Yes, you do,” Bucky pushes, his hand square in the middle of Steve’s chest as they fall into bed.

“There isn’t –”

“Tell me,” Bucky growls, pinching one of Steve’s nipples as he does.

“Ah! Jesus – Buck!” Steve nearly yelps, the twinge in his nipple absolutely delightful. “That – I like – I want that.”

“Like a bit rough?” Bucky clarifies, his eyes roaming all over Steve as if tactfully mapping out his mission.

It makes Steve bite his lip and nod, shivering under Bucky’s concentrated eyes.

“Good,” Bucky purrs. “That’s good, sweetheart.”

And that’s how Steve gets his first experience of the phrase “so good I could cry”. He’d come to comfort Bucky, but he wasn’t sure who got the better end of it because he’s laying in Bucky’s bed due to his inability to move.

He tingles all over – from his scalp, where Bucky had yanked on his hair just shy of too painful, all the way down to his toes that had curled so tightly from his orgasm that he’s almost sure he lost sensation. There’s a lot of things he never thought he’d indulge in – afraid of judgment, of people assuming what he wanted, of people thinking he was weak for wanting the things he did. He hasn’t tried to explain it, about how giving himself over to someone feels so much like safety, despite how contrary it sounds. He’s never built a relationship with someone to trust with this. Trust like this. Like the way he trusts Bucky with every bit of his being.

“What else, hm?”

“I – mark me,” Steve blurts out. He finds that he becomes less and less embarrassed each time he confesses to Bucky, giving Bucky all these little secret wishes, because Bucky grants them over and over again.

“Oh,” Bucky moans. “Angel, you don’t gotta be shy about that. I’d love to put my mark on you.”

Steve could likely die from the look Bucky has on his face right now – predatory and dark, but gleeful nonetheless. He takes in a shaky breath when he first feels Bucky’s teeth on him, scraping along his collarbone. It’s not like Bucky hasn’t bitten him before, but it’s never hard enough for Steve to see it the next day.

“Hard,” Steve whispers in Bucky’s ear, and not a second later, he arches his back off the bed at the white-hot sting. “Guh - fuck!”

His skin pulls as Bucky sucks, tongue pressed flat to Steve’s meaty shoulder, and leaves a deep, dark red brand.

“S’almost like you’re mine,” Bucky teases, and Steve nearly begs for him to make it true. “Go on, gorgeous, what next? My hands, my mouth? My cock?”

“Yes! Need you – inside me,” Steve manages breathily, feeling infinitely more confident in saying it than when they first did this. “... Harder.”

“Anything for you, pretty,” Bucky agrees easily, a wolfish smile across his face. “Turn over for me. Lay down.”

Steve had taken everything, then selfishly goaded Bucky for more — and Bucky obliged. He’s never simultaneously felt so thoroughly fucked and yet so tenderly cared for in his life. He wasn’t even sure something like that was even possible.

Bucky’s arm is slung over his torso, and in turn, his fingers trace the delicate lines of the plates up the bicep — the ink that hides Bucky’s scars from the accident, each solid line a month spent in physiotherapy, each curve a setback, each plateau a new goal reached. It’s a beautiful design, the shading making it look so real, as if his arm were truly cybernetic. He watches as the lines morph into the galaxy of stars that he wants to kiss more than anything.

Steve knows Bucky must have been exhausted, at least emotionally, because he’d rested his eyes for just a few moments before his breathing had slowed to the even pace it is now, dead asleep on Steve’s chest.

He shouldn’t stay. Bucky never stays over with him, and he shouldn’t be overstepping his boundaries either, so despite the way his body protests movement, he eventually slides his legs out from under the blanket, carefully letting Bucky’s arm and head down on the mattress underneath him. It takes forever as he tries to keep his movements miniscule but he takes the time to steal a few more moments, just watching Bucky sleep peacefully, as he gets dressed.

Bucky’s hair has gotten longer since the start of the season, and it fans out all around him, strands thick and soft. Steve wonders what it’s like to wake up to this – to be able to twirl Bucky’s hair in his fingers while Bucky wakes slowly. He wants to whisper “good morning” against Bucky’s forehead and trail his fingers down Bucky’s shivering spine while pretending he doesn’t love when Bucky’s nose presses into neck.

He leaves before his thoughts start to leak into his actions.

December 29, 2013

The next game is against St. Louis, and it's reminiscent of the first time his team took to the ice this season. September seems like eons ago. Though, St. Louis had beat them back then and Steve doesn’t want to repeat that part.

His mind drifts back to Bucky eventually. Automatically.

Even when Bucky isn’t here he still consumes Steve’s thoughts and there’s a distinct lack of his presence in the locker room. Nobody mentions it, but they know. Dugan even casts Steve a sympathetic smile and Val is more quiet, unable to rely on Bucky for better communication.

It’s just like the road trip that they’d had at the beginning of their season – Bucky isn’t on Steve’s wing, and he has a terrible game. He takes two penalties for the first time this year, and doesn’t produce a single point. They’re tied 2-2 by the end of the game, so there’s still hope left, he supposes.

He has to hold onto hope. Hope that they’ll win each game, hope that he’ll have the courage to finally ask Bucky out on a date, hope that Bucky will say yes.

They lose the game 3-2.

Bucky

He’s back at practice the next day, and feels his skin crawling with anticipation of having to face everyone. Sitwell, as much of a dick as he was sometimes, had cleared it up pretty quickly, and Bucky wasn’t entirely sure what he’d done to convince that woman, but he doesn’t want to think about it ever again.

Steve grips Bucky’s forearm over the console as they drive, and gives him a reassuring squeeze before putting it back on the steering wheel. Bucky wishes he didn’t want to hold that hand so damn badly.

He almost wants to be angry with Steve, for making him so desperate to try and detach himself that he’d gone home with that girl, but he knows that’s fucking ridiculous. He was the one to catch feelings, even after they’d agreed to their casual connection.

“Buck, they’re your team,” Steve says after clearing his throat. They’re already pulling into the rink, which means Bucky must’ve zoned out for most of the ride. “We look after our own.”

Bucky nods, because he knows that there’s truth to what Steve is saying. The team has been nothing but supportive so far, but he can’t help the doubt in his brain.

As predicted, the team treats him the same. They don’t scoff at him or give him hell for the unwanted tabloid attention and causing a ruckus. They don’t grill him on what happened that night, and they don’t make any comments about him likely sleeping around. The Bruins had always harped on him for shit like that.

It takes time but he slowly unwinds, feeling like he’s slotting back in the team bit by bit. Practice goes smoothly and Coulson doesn’t seem to treat him any differently on the ice either. He doesn’t even get called into Fury’s office afterward, which was something that had been weighing heavily on his mind ever since the incident.

It almost feels like… a miracle. Nothing in Bucky’s life has ever gone as perfectly as this. Things just don’t simply line up for him like this.

Maybe Mercury is in retrograde or some shit, he thinks to himself because he truly can’t come up with why he’s got this bucket of good luck today.

He’s quiet on the car ride back, but for the opposite reason than coming here.

“You, uh, you okay, Buck?”

Bucky turns to the direction of Steve’s nervous voice with a genuine smile. “Yeah! Yeah, s’all good.”

“Come over for a bit?”

Bucky smiles back. “Yeah, sure.”

—

Bucky never assumes they’re going to end up in bed when they hang out, it just seems to happen more often than not. Way more often.

Today, though, Steve looks a little more hesitant.

Bucky plops himself down on the couch in what he hopes is a very open and casual way to indicate that he’s not looking for anything if Steve isn’t.

Now it’s his turn to ask. “You alright, Steve?”

“Yes,” Steve answers confidently with a nod. “But, I have to ask you something. Tell you something.”

Bucky sits up a little straighter, some instinct tell him to get ready to run.

“But first and foremost – we’re friends, yeah?”

“Yes?”

“Doesn’t sound too reassuring.”

“For Christ’s sake, yes, Steve, we are friends above all else.”

“Right. Okay. So.”

Bucky tries not to stare a hole into Steve’s eyeballs, but the suspense is quite literally killing him; his heart starts to beat a little faster, his hands curling into fists.

“So, I want to ask if you would – maybe be more than that.”

Bucky processes the words, and it sounds like –

“I’m going to need you to say that again,” Bucky says, getting to his feet slowly so he can look Steve in the eyes. “Are you asking…”

“I would like to ask you… Um.” Steve’s confidence seems to have dropped a bit since the initial sentence, but he squares up like Bucky’s seen him do on the ice a hundred times, ready to face anything. “I am asking you out on a date.”

Bucky’s laugh escapes him before he can stop it, his face splitting into a wide grin. He just can’t help the bubbling joy that had risen up — what were the odds that Steve would feel the same way he did? In order to make sure Steve doesn’t get the wrong idea, Bucky wraps his arms around Steve’s neck.

“Yes. I’m saying yes.”

“Really?”

Bucky laughs again at Steve’s face perking up. As if there was ever a chance in hell Bucky would’ve said no.

“Yeah, Stevie. Really.”

“I’ll take you anywhere,” Steve blurts out, his arms wrapping around Bucky’s waist in turn.

“It don’t matter, Cap. I’m a cheap date – jus’ gotta be somewhere with you.”

Now it’s Steve’s turn to chuckle, and Bucky catches the sound with his lips before Steve starts walking them backward to the bedroom.

Apparently, his good luck streak hadn’t quite run out just yet.

[cognitosclowns]

heya, it’s the apartment-anon again!! i saw your reply,, and tbh i’m having some A.B brainrot as well,,, like???? the robot dude w/ an abundance of plants??? my heart…its melting…oh no…….

but yeah i’d really like to see your stuff on A.B’s apartment!!! maybe how his s/o would react to it as well!!

OOH WHAT IF HE GETS A CAT

gah this is too cute!!!! <3333

- 🌱 anon [i guess that works for a long-term name lol]

GUH <333 GHUH <333 GGHHHGHHH <3 THIS IS GONNA BE LONG AGAIN IM SORRY-

SFW BELOW

(OH AND HERES THE PREVIOUS ASK)

OH GOODNESS <3333 THIS ASK IS GIVING ME SUPREME BRAINROT <333

JUST <333 listen his apartment is pretty small all things considered bc he,, doesn't really need much?? BUT ALSO ITS WAY BIGGER THAN ANYTHING HE'S USED TO??

Like esp if he's Mobile and Repaired it feels,, almost wrong having so much empty space to move around in??? Like at least in the Basement Lab has the background noise of computer terminals and pipes n stuff but,,, his apartment is uncannily quiet??

THIS MEANS HE LEAVES THE WINDOW OPEN AT ALL TIMES. Hearing the sounds of the city?? is so soothing. Also its completely new to him?? <33 so like for the first few nights he just kinda,, sits by the window and listens to the world while he reads.

MNSDMSD I MENTIONED THIS IN THE TAGS OF THE PREVIOUS POST THAT LIKE,, he has this Very Bad Habit of picking things up and then placing them somewhere else that is,, Very Percarious??

BC HES A ~PERFECT AI~ SO LIKE,, he can balance shit perfectly and then balance MORE shit on top of THAT shit and now you can't access the window bc theres smth resembling Modern Art in the way

AND OF COURSE, in his hubris he accidentally like,, stumbles a bit and that Slight Vibration causes several Piles Of Books And Trinkets to come clattering down >:( he'll still insist it was from Myc being too loud

OH SPEAKING OF MYC-

AB is a heavy sleeper he is a very heavy sleeper he could probably sleep through a fucking atom bomb but somehow Myc always seems to wake him up at like 3 am with his nonsense

LISTEN HE DIDNT MEAN TO PUT HIS ARM THROUGH THE WALL, IT JUST KINDA HAPPENED

He woke up suddenly and went to,, Bat On The Wall To Tell Him To Shut The Fuck Up and in his half-awake tizzy forgot that he has super strength and.... well

I mean at least Myc shut off his music after so he considers it a resounding success

YES HIM GETTING A LITTLE KITTEN <33

he didn't even get her on purpose - he noticed her climbing along his windowsill and,,, well he couldn't just leave her out there, she could fall and hurt herself and shes just so tiny it would be cruel to leave her out in the snow all alone and Oh No He Has A Cat Now??? When Did This Happen >:(

She's this,, tiny little white Cornish Rex?? No matter how much he feeds her she stays vv thin and lanky lmao.

Her 'Official Name' is Piper, (as in the Pied Piper bc,,, Jesus Christ He's Pretty Sure She's Killed Half The Rats In Virginia At This Point With How Many She Keeps Leaving Around. She takes after her dads homicidal tendencies I guess)

(ALSO,,, PRINCESS <33 bc she IS his little princess <333 yea he coos little endearments at her but he would never admit that lmao)

She perches as high as she can and just,, stares at everything. It unnerves ppl and he loves it <333 ITS THOSE BIG OL EYES, ALWAYS SUPER SHARP. The only time they get all Big is when she's being ignored and decides Fathers Ankles Need To Be Swiped For This Crime >:(

she doesn't audibly purr but,, like,, when you pet her you can feel her vibrating?? HE ADORES IT <333

YOURE 99% SURE THAT CAT HAS IT OUT FOR YOU THOUGH. LIKE SHE KEEPS GROWLING AT YOU WHEN YOURE JUST,, EXISTING. THIS BATTLE IS NEVER-ENDING SORRY LMAO.

THE PLANTS WERE,, ANOTHER THING THAT JUST KINDA HAPPENED.

It started with Brett getting him a little succulent to 'break in the new home', and he got used to taking care of it and,,, so when Elliot needed to get rid of a few old houseplants to make room for a new desk of course AB was the first one to ask and-

I MEAN HIS PLACE IS GORGEOUS, JUST,,, A BIT CLUTTERED LMAO.

It really does feel like a greenhouse <333 theres plants wherever he can stick them. You're pretty sure he'd have dandelions growing out of the floorboards if you gave him the chance.

LIKE YOU CAN STILL MOVE AROUND BUT YOU ALWAYS WORRY YOU'RE GONNA KNOCK OVER HIS TULIPS OR SMTH. He's very proud of everything and you can practically see him resisting the urge to start explaining all the intricacies of growing each of them.

MSNDMSD ILL CUT THIS OFF HERE BC ITS ALREADY GETTING LONG <333 BUT AAA I ADORE THIS IDEA SO MUCH. ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 275: YAAAAY but Also AHHHHH

Previously on BnHA: Endeavor was all “I’M FIGHTING TOMURA AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME” and set everything on fire. Unlike SOME people, however, it turns out fire is NOT Tomura’s weakness, so he basically just shrugged it off. But before things could progress any further, AFO was all “psst, go get One for All” and Tomura was all “? One for All?” and Endeavor was all “?? One for All?” and Deku and Kacchan, who were listening in on their earpieces, were all “!!!” Having thus realized that Tomura was targeting him, Deku sped off to lead him somewhere away from the civilians... accompanied by his good friend Bakugou “274 chapters of character development have all been leading up to this” Katsuki. Because like hell are you going to have an EPIC BATTLE with the FINAL VILLAIN without him, you damn nerd. Who’s he going to heroically sacrifice himself for if you’re not there?? Hahh!?

Today on BnHA: Deku and Kacchan fly off to battle Tomura after confusing Endeavor into giving them his location (which wasn’t very hard lmao). En route, Deku finally thinks to ask Kacchan why he’s tagging along, and Kacchan is all “DON’T GET ME WRONG, IT’S JUST BECAUSE I WANT REVENGE ON TOMURA, AND DEFINITELY NOT BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT YOU AT ALL, HOW DARE YOU, WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT”, which is super convincing and didn’t make me roll my eyes at all. Anyways so then Tomura shows up and is all “EYO TIME TO KILL YOU NOW” and Deku and Kacchan are all “OH SFFKDFK”, but fortunately Gran shows up to save them in the nick of time, because BnHA is literally the only shounen manga in which grown-ups will see kids trying to lead a battle and be like “lol wtf” and actually try to stop that shit instead of being all “what are your orders, children.” The chapter then ends with the heroes doing EXACTLY WHAT THEY SHOULD BE DOING??Namely, having the guy who can TURN OFF QUIRKS battle the guy with the ultimate death quirk! I’m so proud. But also I swear to god, if Tomura so much as breathes suspiciously in his direction...!! What the fuck. HORIKOSHI.

y’all what in the fresh hell is this bs

not yet there isn’t son but if you keep trolling like this I can give your nervous system something to actually be nervous about

anyway. this was his comment from last week’s issue of Jump, and I have absolutely no idea what it’s referring to, is the fun part! did he cry because of something he was working on in a chapter that’s coming up? or is he just tired from a combination of stressful mangaka schedule + 2020 in general?? or hell, for all I know he just recently watched Titanic or some shit

(ETA: KILLING AIZAWA SHOUTA WOULDN’T MAKE SOMEONE CRY OUT OF JOY, THOUGH. RIGHT?!)

anyways I guess it’s time to read and see if I feel like sadly happily crying for two hours afterward

-- oh shit I just realized there are two scanlations out for this?? one from readjump.com, and one from readheroacademia.com. lol now what. uhhh

lulzes. I guess I’ll go with RHA for now and keep checking back to RJ after each page and I’ll go with whichever translation I liked better

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, OUR MILLENNIAL VILLAIN

or would he actually be gen z. he was already in his twenties when this manga started like six years ago, so I’m going with millennial. but on the cusp though I guess. anyway, he plays video games though is the point

and I see he’s already decided to contradict me and my inane speculations not two panels in! I GUESS I AM JUST A FOOL. that’s really interesting though. I wonder if it’s just Monoma’s quirk that doesn’t take the accumulated “save data” from the people he copies from, then? guh. how many of my AFO/OFA theory notes do I have to scrap now

and there’s a little quirk blurb about Search, which is fairly useless given that we already know how it works (actually in even greater detail than shown here), but at least it comes with a cute little picture of Ragdoll in her hero costume, to make us all sad and stuff

so anyways Tomura who are you looking at?? this was a topic of some contention last week! also why were you only seeing nine people then. Ragdoll had seen everyone in 1-A along with Aizawa and her fellow Pussycats at a minimum, so is this confirmation that Tora and Mandalay and Pixie-Bob are all really dead then, because I CAN AND WILL HUNT DOWN A MAN AND MAKE HIM CRY FOR A GOOD DEAL LONGER THAN TWO HOURS IF THAT’S REALLY THE CASE. was Kouta not traumatized enough already?? LET’S JUST ORPHAN HIM AGAIN WHY NOT THAT’S A GOOD PLAN

(ETA: I really hate that we are still up in the air regarding this? and I mean, sure, why not, we only had like a dozen lady heroes to begin with, so why not just kill off two more of them, offscreen, in one fell swoop??)

WHAT IS A SHAME. TOMURA. DAMN IT

(ETA: ??)

-- well hello there

OR MAYBE I WAS NOT A FOOL AT ALL?? lol guys. please do not tell me my hobo husband is flying his vengeful ass over to where Tomura all heedless of the danger because I really do not need that just yet. CAN MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS PLEASE FUCKING TAKE TURNS BEING IN TERRIBLE DANGER INSTEAD OF ALL AT ONCE

sob we’re cutting back to Endeavor and Deku and Kacchan. ACTUALLY THAT’S GOOD THOUGH why am I complaining. I’m just gonna have to get used to the fact that no one is going to truly be safe for the next god knows however many chapters, and make my peace with that. hahaha. yeah right

lmao Deku. “HEY WHAT’S UP, ME AND MY FELLOW CHILD HERE ARE GONNA LURE SHIGARAKI TOWARDS US, BUT WE’LL EXPLAIN OUR REASONS FOR THAT LATER. IF YOU SEE HIM MAKING ANY SUDDEN MOVEMENTS PLEASE INFORM US SO AS TO AID US IN THIS PLAN.” Endeavor if you just go along with this I will lose so much respect for you lmao

lol he is trying to argue a bit but then he’s suddenly cutting off. so in hindsight I don’t know why I said “lol”, really. I’M JUST NERVOUS OKAY

btw in the other translation Deku straight up asks if Endeavor can redirect Tomura towards them. “sure no problem bucko, let me just tell the walking apocalypse exactly where he can find you, my two sixteen-year-old interns whose safety I am responsible for. I was just thinking to myself that I hadn’t had my fill of crazy ill-thought-out plans with a high risk of death today”

holy --

okay I have not the SLIGHTEST clue what’s going on here, even after analyzing both scans, except that someone, probably Tomura, either just went CRONCH or just GOT cronched just now lmao. let us read on to find out who was cronched and who did the cronching

the rest of this page is not really much more helpful

but I am becoming increasingly suspicious that those were in fact Tomura’s new, improved and ridiculously thicc legs doing the cronching as he did a Marvel Superhero Landing from the most RIDICULOUS ANGLE POSSIBLE

LMAO NOW WHAT

so he just cronched onto the ground and fooshed Endeavor and then went flying off again huh

LMAO AT EVERYTHINNNNNG

THANK YOU ENJI. HE’LL LURE HIM AWAY. lols WHY THE FUCK DID YOU TELL THEM WHICH WAY HE WAS HEADED YOU BOOB

he really just fucking hung up on him afterwards too. just, “got it thanks amigo just leave everything to me, [CLICK]”

OH MY GOD

BECAUSE WE CAN’T HAVE ANYONE ELSE CONVENIENTLY INTERFERING WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR LITTLE THROWDOWN OF DESTINY HUH. THAT WOULD JUST BE TERRIBLE

-- oh shit

that’s just. a SLIGHT change in meaning, there. silly me. thinking “get rid of them” meant “get rid of their communications as opposed to FUCKING KILLING THE ONE YOU’RE NOT ACTUALLY AFTER. hmm. well that’s not good

(ETA: never have I been so happy that a translation was wrong lmao.)

so now Endeavor’s shouting at everyone else that Tomura is heading southwest and that he has “SUPER REGENARTION” (sic) and is no longer THE SAME THUG HE WAS BEFORE and yeah RHA you have officially won me over, flaws and all. listen up boyos. this ain’t your granddaddy’s Shigaraki Tomura. this one regenars

also “that damn kid...” like why the hell did my son have to go and befriend two protagonists. why is this my life now

AHAHAHAHA

“MIDORIYA IS IN DANGER...!!” STORY OF THIS MANGA. AHAHA. KACCHAN HE’S COMING. HE’S COMING, KACCHAN. for you two. someone please help me I am both terrified and thrilled beyond all recognition and my body doesn’t know how to handle the conflicting emotions. honestly crying for two hours is starting to sound more and more appealing

oh my god I forgot they didn’t know, though

fff. Kacchan especially didn’t know, because unlike Deku he doesn’t have random bits of other people’s souls going “heyyyyyyy... transcendent being at 12 o’clock.” what has this kid so bravely and stupidly gone and gotten himself into

look at them go

damn Deku can you really not float yet?? that’s going to be really inconvenient if that’s the case

(ETA: my boy really would have just straight up died. he would have died so hard.)

OH MY GOD

NOW YOU WANT TO ASK HIM LMAOOOO. well it’s because of all the character development!! if you must know

THAT’S NOT AN ANSWER BLASTY MCANGERTY

you’re not as smooth as you think you are, you know. we all know why you actually followed him. but fine, be that way

okay so now he’s giving a real-er answer though

“understand the situation”, the situation being that your best friend and his secret-trump-card-in-the-battle-against-evil quirk were being targeted by the guy who just obliterated this entire city. got it. you put it quite succinctly

and Deku is all

and Kacchan is all

love how he throws that protagonist crack in there too. because we all know that Deku absolutely is the protagonist lol, and so if that part’s obviously not true, we can make some inferences about the rest of what he’s saying too now can’t we

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh snap

YOU SURE DO!! and he does with you too!! :) it’s gonna be one big happy reunion! :) :) :) oh gosh golly

OH NO KATSUKI WHAT ARE YOU DOING

what are you doing to me, I should clarify. please be considerate of my feelings. you can’t just DUMP sudden Kacchan Kamino Angst on me without any warning, you have to let me know in advance so that I can buy some thank you cards

THERE’S MOREEEEE???

YOU REMEMBER TOO, DON’T YOU DEKU. HE WAS ALL CRYING AND STUFF. IT WAS A LOT. IT’S POSSIBLE THAT I HAVE NEVER PERSONALLY GOTTEN OVER IT

AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE NEVER QUITE GOT OVER IT EITHER

:’)

by the way in the other translation he says “I’ll make up for what I did that day.” so yeah. BOOM. right to the heart. shot of me collapsing to the ground in slow motion

but it’s interesting though that he still can’t admit to having selfless motives yet! even after everything he’s been through and all his character growth! he’s still all GET RID OF THE REFERENCES TO ME CARING ABOUT YOU, WE CAN’T LET PEOPLE KNOW WE HAVE FEELINGS

but even his Kamino feels are notably first and foremost about him feeling responsible for failing All Might. so yeah, buddy. where does that leave you? even your feeble excuses are still rooted in selflessness, JUST GIVE IN AND ADMIT YOU’VE BEEN SECRETLY GIVING A SHIT BEHIND EVERYONE’S BACK. and honestly he might be better off at this point if he didn’t! BUT HE DOES. and that’s that

anyways Deku I sure hope you and your big hero brain can see right through this nonsense

god. you’re both in so much danger though, do you even have any idea?! of course you fucking don’t. god

HELLO BAKUGOU NARRATION!?!

well that’s one hell of a rare sight!! all fresh and chock full of shrewd observations about his best rival’s current skillset. ah what a time we’re living in

ooooh

gonna hold off commentary until I read the next part of this lol

OOOOOH

goddamn. Horikoshi really went off this week. just a whole chapter’s worth of Stuff Makeste Really Likes, goddamn is it my birthday or what

so do you guys think he’ll be able to keep pace all the way up to 100%? I can see this part being interpreted in two totally different ways if I’m being honest. on the one hand we have the more pessimistic (some would say realistic) view that Bakugou is desperately trying to convince himself that he’s still on the same level as the rival he so desperately wants to surpass, but with the sinking feeling that he’s actually not going to be able to keep up for much longer. and then on the other side of the coin we have the more glass-half-full perspective that he actually is capable of keeping up with him right to the bitter end. that even as Deku grows stronger, he’ll continue to push himself and use that as motivation to keep getting stronger too. that Deku isn’t out of reach; that his goal isn’t out of reach

and I’m not completely sure which way this is leaning myself! I personally would like to lean more towards the second interpretation, because y’all know I love me some rivals. and also because imo one of the most commendable things about Bakugou’s development has been how he hasn’t once been envious of Deku’s strength or of his position as All Might’s chosen heir since he learned about OFA. he hasn’t once shown any kind of resentment towards him for it, or doubted whether or not he deserves it. and as minor a detail as that may seem to some people, I cherish it. and I don’t want that to change! but I guess we shall see

so now we’re getting the clearest shot we’ve had yet of the new AFO holes in Tomura’s palms as he gets ready to combine some more quirks. also! more information about the quirks he has and is using! fucking thank you, where was this last week

so “radio waves” is clearly going to be used here to disrupt the heroes’ communication, which is a shame for them, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t relieved given the alternative! the RJ translation is clearly just a hot mess lol. but I still adore that one “I’ll make up for what I did” line though

WOW

THE DISRESPECT. LOL DID YOU JUST FUCKING KILL HIS ASS

(ETA: I just realized he’s nowhere to be found after this, though, so... did he?? or is he now lying somewhere now all wounded and waiting to be found by one, or, dare I say, two of his sons? ...)

LKDFJLSDKGHOSIDGHOISDflkwejfdfsdklggdflgnfdlgndakgalkgldfdfkwlfwiowelKLDSGKSL:DKGJL:DKFM?G?SGSDLKG?SDFSDF??LKJ@L!

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

even if you ask him nicely??! somehow I just can’t help feeling that he probably shouldn’t oblige you, though!?!?!

anyways. THAT AIN’T SAFE. and what the hell is happening in that bottom left corner ahhhhhh

AHHHHHHH

GRAN DM ME YOUR ADDRESS I WANT TO SEND YOU SOME FLOWERS AND A BASKET OF FRUIT AND CRACKERS AND SOME LITTLE CHEESES AND SAUSAGES

jesus christ it completely slipped my mind that there was one other person currently in the vicinity who knows about OFA. my good sir, maybe you would like to introduce these two dunderfucks to the concept of a “plan.��� and maybe you can also find the single shared braincell they apparently dropped and lost somewhere back there in all the city rubble

oh fuck me

(ETA: does Kacchan look so rattled here because he is being lectured, or because he just saw a vision of his own death and is now having it explained to him just how close he came to being decomposed. you decide! I’ll just sit here and bask in the angst.)

fuck. main character gods were really working overtime here. anyways so how are you all doing this fine Friday afternoon. me, I’m just sitting here wrangling with the knowledge that Tomura’s quirk is even deadlier than I realized, and that my two little boys came within inches of dying horrible deaths just now. but anyways it’s not as humid today as it was yesterday so that’s really nice

anyways so now Gran is continuing to lecture the mayor of Dumb Ideas Town here, along with his friend the deputy mayor who still thinks he outranks the actual mayor

SHH NOW AND LISTEN TO YOUR GRANDPA

-- ohhhh shit son are they mounting a counterattack?? don’t tell me!!

also is Gran seriously faster than Tomura. that makes no fucking sense, and yet these two are only alive now because of it so I’M SURE NOT GONNA QUESTION IT

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

AND IS AIZAWA ON HER BACK THOUGH???

AHAHHAHAHAHAHA

AH, BUT IT AIN’T GONNA WORK THOUGH, IS IT!!! AHAHAHA YESSSSSS

excellent question sir. the short answer is “they’re idiots”, and the long answer is just a longer version of “they’re idiots” but with some more complicated BakuDeku feels mixed in. I’ll tell you all about it if you just promise me that you’ll actually live through this, all right?

“is he after the two of them?” listen boy if you don’t finally put two and two together after this I’m gonna be fucking beside myself lol. (though honestly, Deku and Kacchan have been targeted by the League so many other times already that he might just simply accept “yeah they’re after them again” without any further explanation)

my dear gentlefolk would you fucking look at how the lord has blessed us on this day

Aizawa Fucking Shouta and the motherfucking dramatic intro to end all dramatic intros. finally this man gets his moment

someone please teach me how to cast a force field. teach me how to reach into the manga and slap this man and tell him to stop talking about how everyone’s noble sacrifices to protect him and his eraser quirk have led him to this day and to this one encounter. my guy. my fucking dude. THERE HAD BETTER BE SUBSEQUENT ENCOUNTERS AFTER THIS

NOOOOOOOOOOOO

ISN’T HE THOUGH??? Tomura I love you sweetie but you better BACK THE FUCK. OFF

well FINE THEN! BE THAT WAY. it’s not like my life revolves around you and your stupid manga anyway!! it’s not like I’m obsessed with it or anything!! I have other hobbies!! well I actually do have other hobbies, so that doesn’t really work as sarcasm, so let’s see though. maybe something more like, “this isn’t by far my favorite out of all my hobbies!!” I don’t spend 80-90% of my free time on any given day either actively or passively daydreaming about this series and writing essays in my head and reading fanfic and scrolling through art on tumblr!! etc.!! whatever!! enjoy your break!! have fun living your life!!

please don’t kill Aizawa

[fairwindsandblueskies]

Problem Solver

Locke let loose a puff of smoke from his lips and ran his finger up against his eyebrow, scratching gently at it while the large Roegadyn sitting across the table from him planted his empty mug loudly against its surface. 

“Done, now where the hell is he?” He asked out loud to which Locke replied with a half-hearted shrug, but before Loe could follow up there was a loud clatter heard across the other end of the tavern followed by a long string of curses from a man running his mouth off at another sat sprawled across the floor with spilled mugs at his side.

Even at a glance, Locke could already tell who it was and a soft sigh left his lips as he stamped out the lit cigarette between his fingers into a nearby ashtray. 

“Trouble?” Asked Loe who rose slightly from his seat to get a better look.

“Aye,” Locke replied as he rose from his seat. 

“Want me to tag along, Cap’n?” 

“No, I’ll handle this one.” Locke promptly replied before making his way over with a half-empty bottle of booze gripped tightly in his right hand. 

The two men looming over the one on the ground had their backs toward him. A Roegadyn and a Highlander by the looks of it. They didn’t even notice Locke as he casually made his way over, not until he finally spoke to call their attention. 

“Do we have a problem, gentlemen?” He asked as he glanced them over from head to toe. The Highlander was unarmed from what he saw, but the Roegadyn was carrying a dagger at his hip. And upon hearing his question the two men turned to face him. The Roegadyn looked irritated at best, but the Highlander was absolutely fuming with a mug in hand as he looked the Midlander over. “Huh? Yeah, now how about minding your own damn business?” Said the Highlander, slurring every word that left his mouth as he reached out, shoving Locke back a step. “Captain!” Said the man on the floor as he quickly clambered up onto his own two feet, causing the Roegadyn between them both to glance over toward him and then back to Locke as his irritated expression slowly shifted to genuine surprise upon recognizing the man.  “Fairwind? I… uh, nobody told me you were back in town.” The Roegadyn said. “Aye, just arrived the other night.” Said Locke as he brushed a hand across his own shoulder. Uttering each word with a straight face, though he made no effort to hide the rising anger in his voice. “Fair who?” Said the Highlander as he glanced between his friend and the Midlander standing in front of them. “Look, I don’t care who the hell you are. Somebody’s paying for my damn drunk.” “Like I said, you were the one who ran into- GUH!” The man from Locke’s crew pitched in but was quickly silenced by the Highlander who threw what remnants remained in his mug into the man’s face. Cutting him off as the soaked crewman took a step back to wipe his sleeve over his eyes. Without warning the sound of breaking glass silenced the patrons of the tavern who were already watching curiously as Locke smashed the bottle he held across the Highlander’s face, sending the man right into the ground as he clutched a hand over his eye and let loose a yell of pain while scattered bits of broken glass flung across the floor.

The Roegadyn paused momentarily in shock, staring at his friend writhing against the floor as he cried out. “Fuck! Fuck! My eye! My goddamn eye!” The Highlander yelled, as trickles of blood began to seep between his fingers and slide across his face. 

When it finally registered, the Roegadyn quickly went for the dagger at his hip. Large fingers curled against its handle, but in one swift motion Locke beat him to the draw as he pulled his pistol from its holster hidden away within his coat, hammer cocked and at the ready before pressing the barrel in against the man’s gut prompting the Roegadyn to freeze in fear as his mouth lay agape.  “You draw that blade, and I promise it’ll be the last thing you do.” Locke said with his finger ready on the trigger, and after a short pause the Roegadyn slowly released his hand from the dagger and held both his hands out to the side as non-threateningly as he could manage. “Good boy,” He said as he flashed a mocking grin towards the man. “Now, here’s the story. It looks like your friend here had a little too much to drink. And in his drunken stupor he not only managed to knock over the drinks that my friend here was carrying, but he was clumsy enough to fall and smash his head into a bottle. And you, being the generous man that you are, decided to pay for our drinks on his behalf.” “I did? Um, aye. I did. Right.” The Roegadyn fumbled over some of his words as he reached into his pocket to pull out his coin purse from within. “You know what? Leave the entire thing. And you might want to get your friend here to a doctor. I trust he’ll need one after a nasty fall like that.” The Roegadyn only nodded as he placed his coin purse onto the table beside him and bent over to pick up his friend, propping the Highlander up onto his own two feet as the two shuffled past Locke. “One more thing,” Said the Midlander as he stuffed his revolver back into its holster. “If I have to hear about this again, we’re going to have a problem. Do I make myself clear?” “Aye, crystal.” Said the Roegadyn before rushing off with his friend in tow. And as tensions died the other patrons at the bar slowly began to slide back into their usual routines once more, though a number still shot a few wary glances toward the black haired Midlander who picked up the coin purse from the table and tossed it over toward the man from his crew.  “Sorry about that, boss.” He said as he quickly took two steps back to catch the pouch within his hands. “We look after our own. Now go get us another round before Loe makes a fuss, yeah?” “Aye, Captain.” 

[wheremytwinwatches]

[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 19

Last time, Ross lived and was snuck out to Xing, Ed got yet another reason to hate Scar, Barry met himself, and Gluttony paid Riza a visit. Onwards!

Oh dear, all Roy can hear is gunshots from “Elizabeth”’s end. Go, Flame Alchemist! Save your bestie! Never mind, let’s just ignore the fights and go back to Sword Guy utterly disregarding the notion of Confidentiality. He says that Barry says the Colonel’s got a plan to smoke out the Goths from the Fifth Laboratory. This causes Al to head out, searching for Hughes’ murderer. Stop whining Ling, Al will tooootaly tell you when he gets back. Later, Winry! Episode 19 - “Death of the Undying” Uh oh, Gluttony’s got Riza by the neck, and she’s out of ammo. The Goth just chuckles at his multiple headshots, he’s about to eat Riza someone quick dog? Where’d the dog come from. Oh hey, Fuery’s here! Thanks for tossing Riza a new pistol, you’ve almost made up for ruining my Fuhrer Fury joke with this! Two people shooting at once is a bit more effective, but only just. Gluttony’s knocked to the window but his big frame doesn’t fit, and he’s healed up from the bullet holes in a few seconds as Riza and Fuery click their now-empty weapons. Ok, time for the backup of the backup to arrive!

Oh my Leto it is so satisfying to see that Goth go flying out the tower to the caption of [Gluttony screams]. Nice timing, Roy, good hustle! Riza… is not exactly appreciative of the rescue, yells at Roy for leaving his post and blowing his plausible deniability. Fuery just chuckles at them going at it, looking down at the charred body and wondering who the fat guy was. Ok, now get down there and finish the job, Gluttony isn’t finished off just- Whoop, Bio!Barry’s making a break for it, with the homicidal Soul Armor in pursuit. Roy and Riza bark out orders to the minion and mutt respectively. Then slooowly walk down the stairs as Riza thanks Roy for saving their life, Roy’s too focused on the mission to see her smile. Daw. Huh, once again Roy makes better time than I thought, Havoc’s barely run a few paces before he pulls up in a car and tells to loser to get in, they’re going Goth hunting. And then Al shows up! Buckle up buddy, time for a chase through the city. Well at least Barry’s having fun, chasing down the meatbag to do an impromptu funeral. Riza’s reloading and wondering if Blubber Man’s going to stay down, less sure than Roy after her own bullets had next to no effect. Al asks if he had an Uroboros tattoo, when she confirms seeing on his tongue he identifies him as a Homunculus. Hey, watch where you’re driving Roy! Said Colonel isn’t exactly happy to learn that the Goth probably survived the barbecue. Much later, looks like they’ve cornered BioBarry in the Third Laboratory. A direct tie to the military, then? Well, with that connection they can pull back. Uh, Barry? That is the opposite of pulling back. And Roy’s happy about this? Oh I get it, the crazy Soul Armor goes running in, and Roy’s Crew get to follow “in hot pursuit of the crazed murderer”. You other cops, go and secure the perimeter or something. Down into the Basement of Dramatic String Music they go, but then they face the bane of adventuring parties: a split corridor. Oh yeah, split the party, this can only go well. Roy and Havoc are going around, remarking at how dilapidated everything looks- Uh oh. Lust. Havoc, beware the Angry Girlfriend! On a more serious note, oh crap the party is split up in a basement presumably with multiple Goths. Might be time to stage a retreat. Ok ok, another laugh at how Havoc is a fool for honkers, but for real, back to seriousness. Roy asks about Hughes, and when Lust taunts him he goes for a kneeshot. It shows she’s a Homunculus, but it’ll take more than that to- Roy interrupts her monologue with the rest of his clip, it’s about as effective as we can expect but at least it shut her up for a few moments. But the claws come out, and Lust… stabs herself? Oh. Oh dear. That’s a Philosopher’s Stone. So if all the Goths are built around this miraculous tool of Transmutation then they’ll just keep coming back. On the plus side, now we have a clear weakness: destroy the Stone and they lose their regeneration. Quick Roy, shoot the Glowing Weak Spot! Nope, too slow. Now that Lust is finished talking to the Soon-To-Be-Dead-Men, she disarms them… and slices a water pipe, rendering Roy’s Ignition Gloves useless. Well, crap. Both men run screaming for the exit, tumble outside while Havoc asks what they’re gonna do. But Roy’s happy? Oh! He may have lost his signature ability, but he’s still a State Alchemist who can transmute any materials on hand. Say, a bunch of water into hydrogen gas? Thanks for cutting that pipe, lady! Here, have a lighter!

Al and Riza pick up on the Big Boom, but Riza just steels herself and keeps searching for their target. Good trust in your boss, here’s hoping you two don’t end up in the same situation. After the Jean Havoc/Lust narrator cards, Roy and Havoc are searching the now-torched room. A bit of snarking about the busted ex-girlfriend gift how bad cigarettes are, Roy says aw man why did you say that without a body. She’ll be just in the next room and or no she’s in this one under the rubble! Havoc’s been spiked! Oh crap oh crap, Roy’s still weaponless in a room with Lust, this isn’t good. Oh right, Havoc’s gun which good Leto is rather strong, Lust is down an arm. She’s still boasting about how Roy can’t put her down for good… while her Stone is exposed. Yoink! It’s rather effective, and Lust actually crumbles away. A bit anticlimactic, honestly. But now Roy’s got the MacGuffin! Now to heal Havoc, give it to the Elric Brothers, and the show’s over! I wonder what complication is going to come up now. Roy gets ready to cast Heal and GUH OH MY LETO NO NO NO Lust just grew back around the Stone, her half-formed body chided Roy for being so forward, and Spiky Fingers to the chest. And now HE’S here! [Lab Guard Captain]: “Uh-- Uh… Your Excellency!” [Fuhrer Wrath]: “What’s the current status?” This is not backup! This is the opposite of backup! Lust dumps Roy on the ground, oh-so-sad that she’s been forced to kill such a promising sacrificial candidate as she shreds his glove and leaves him to watch Havoc die before he himself bleeds out. Um. Wow. I can hope that with Lust pulling the classic “Leave before you see them die for sure” mistake that they’ll be ok? Please? Havoc? Come on, answer me buddy. While this awfulness is going on, Al and Riza arrive in an incredibly bright white room with a large Alchemy Symbol (the same on we saw in Xerxes?) on the wall, and Barry looking down at the lifeless remains of his old body, commenting on how a soul shoved in another form is so harmful. This of course shocks Al, makes him wonder if he’ll survive as a Soul Armor until they can reform their original bodies. Al… *Sigh* Riza, just put the pistol down, we’re perfectly aware at how effective that is against the Goths. Lust demands to know why Barry is helping out our guys, he basically says it’s for the heck of it and he wants to kill her anyway. The Goth just complains about how she’ll have to kill a second candidate now since Al tagged along, at which point Barry gets tired of waiting and charges and he’s dead now. Whelp. So long, Barry the Butcher. So now that that’s out of the way, Lust prepares to send Riza after her superior. Riza… does not take the news well. [Furious!Riza]: “You biiittch!!” She empties one pistol to mournful music, same with the second, and finishes with a revolver. All to achieve Lust standing back up and patronizingly asking if she’s done. Aw hell no, don’t you fucking dare call Riza weak. Al, pound her face in. Damnit Riza, take this chance and get out of here! Al’s the only one who can at least slow her down with his Transmutation ability and the fact that he’s friggin metal while you’re flesh and blood, get moving! But no, they keep doing the “save yourself, no you save yourself” thing heroes do while Lust stands there annoyed.

How old is Al again? Whatever it is, it’s way too goddamn young for him to be standing his ground against this murderer, screaming about how [Al]: “I’m sick of watching people die! And I can’t just sit back and take it anymore!” -to a montage of all those touched by death in this show, including that time someone got stabbed while inside him. Friggen Leto, this show. [wait, WHAT?!]: “Well spoken… I couldn’t agree more.” Al IMMEDIATELY earthbends up a shield to protect him and Riza as the room gets filled with ALL OF THE FIRE, it clears to see charred Lust looking oh-so-satisfyingly shocked as The Badass Roy grits out that he got her on her knees, after all. Then the camera pans to oh my Leto I did not expect to see The Badass Roy’s chiseled abs today but I am happy that I did, as he stands there in all his determined glory clutching his stab wounds with one hand and holding the not-so-broken lighter in the other. Or still broken, but The Badass Roy didn’t let that stop him as he just uses the flint to get a spark and a TC carved into his own hand. Cue EVEN MORE FIRE as Lust whines about how he should have bled out by now, but of course The Flame Alchemist seared the wound closed, admits that he aaaaalmost passed out from the pain before MORE FIRE. Now, about that claim that he couldn’t kill you? Let’s see how many FIREs it takes to get to the center of a Gothie-pop, huh?! Again! And again! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN! BURN, YOU BITCH! No no fuck no you don’t get to suddenly be patched up and charging towards The Badass Roy no no no [The Bitch]: “You killed me.” YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS Lust is crumbling to ashes now as The Badass Roy’s attacks have seemed to finally have damaged her Stone. But she wouldn’t be a Goth if she didn’t go out with a disparaging monologue, pleased that she at least was killed by a man with such cold and focused eyes, looking forward to the day those eyes are wide with agony. [Lust]: “It’s coming... It’s coming…” The Philosopher's Stone falls, and crumbles away. Finally, Roy falls, the effort of his attack and his injuries overcoming him. Riza and Al brush off his thanks and prepare to get a medic aw HELL no I’d forgotten about Bradley, he’s just outside the room- but he just sheathed his sword and walked away. Bwuh? You’re letting them live? What’s your game, Wrath? Ok whatever, the Fuhrer is being mysterious, what else is new, just get Roy and Havoc some help right now! Oh yeah, Winry’s been left at the hotel all day. She’s telling herself over and over that Al’s alright. And here he is! A bit worse for wear, but nothing a little bit of TLT (Tender Loving Transmutation) won’t fix! And he can even do it himself, so no worries Winry! [Winry]: “Moron! Welcome back!” [Al]: “Uh, okay… thanks!” Aw, laugh it out you two. And maybe get some glue for Al’s arm. Wait, Barry’s still alive?! Oh, Lust missed his sigil with her attack, so he’s down to just that little piece of sheet metal. But he’ll be back- wait, BioBarry’s still alive?! How in Leto’s name did he survive all of the FIRE? Well whatever, we get a part-funny, part-bittersweet moment as dumb old BioBarry paws at Barry’s sigil, wiping it away and sending The Butcher off for good. Sayanora, you homicidal maniac. Thanks for your help in the end. Oh hey, Al! How you doing, Protagonist? The Mighty Armstrong and Breda are seeing him off at the train station, is he finally going back to Central to rejoin the Blonde Kids? Well, at least Al will have one heck of a story for him. Never mind, looks like a detour to the graveyard… where there’s someone there? In a brown coat with blond hair… no, it can’t be… It’s him. The man we’ve only seen in flashbacks and the intro. The man who’s forever covered up in pictures. It’s Papa Elric. It’s Hohenheim. … And THAT’S WHERE WE END THE EPISODE?! WHAT THE-

[gold-from-straw]

Frozen Heart - ch5

Loki has a bad morning, but on the plus side, now Tony is well rested, he's able to recognise some accidental culture clash and resolve their awful misunderstanding! TW for panic attacks, blood, and accidental self-harm caused by a nightmare.

Read from the beginning on AO3 if you prefer! I’m tagging anyone who left a note on the previous chapter here as well, hope that’s OK!

Loki woke with a jolt, his heart pounding, nightmares of a frozen world and evil red eyes lingering in the fringes of his mind. He lifted trembling hands to cover his face, and nearly screamed.

He stumbled out of bed, his heart thumping, trying to get away from the vicious black claws, the blue skin that had haunted his nightmares since his childhood. He scratched at his arm, tore at the pale lines raised in the skin, whimpering and panicking, the quiet, calm voice inside now drowned out by the storm, and he couldn’t find himself, couldn’t dig himself out from under this hellish mask, this curse, this…

“Hey! Hey, Loki, please, calm, will you? Hey, look at me? I’m not going to touch you, alright? I just want you to look at the lights, can you do that? Can you breathe in with the light as it gets brighter? That’s great, keep going… OK, and now out. Like you’re whistling, purse your lips, yeah, just like that. Now in, feel it… feel it filling you up or… yeah, this is good. That’s great, buddy. OK, I’m just gonna… can I see your arms?”

Stark came closer, still holding his hands out in front of him and looking as unthreatening as possible. Logically Loki could see that he was veryunthreatening, a small mortal in soft clothing, hair still sleep-mussed and face pillow-creased, but with his heart still hammering inside his own chest, he couldn���t handle logic at all. He tugged his arms closer to himself, fingers slick with his own blood.

Then he looked down. The blood was indigo. He whimpered and pushed his arms out as far from himself as he could, staggering backwards, his breathing speeding up again.

“Hey, hey, it’s OK! I’ll get them fixed up, no worries.” Stark cupped his hands around Loki’s wrists, making a surprised hum. “Wow, you’re cold.”

Loki let out a burst of hysterical laughter that very nearly turned into a sob. How utterly pathetic. To have been reduced to a scared child, cowering in someone else’s room, terrified of his own appearance after a nightmare… Loki turned his face and closed his eyes. It was almost unbearable.

Stark tugged him gently over to the bed, encouraging him to sit. He left him there, staring down helplessly, hatefully, at his blue, bleeding arms. “Here we go,” Stark said a moment later, setting a bowl of water down by Loki’s feet. He took Loki’s wrist in his hand and started dabbing the blood away, staining the water an inky blue. Loki stared at the colour diffusing through the water and tried not to despair.

“There we go,” Stark said with a grin. Loki looked at his forearms, wrapped in pristine white bandages. He felt emptied out, like his heart had been excavated from his chest, leaving him dull and hollow. Stark’s smile slowly slipped from his face and he bit his lip. “Ah, do you… do you want to talk a bit?”

Loki blinked at him.

“Like, uh… do you maybe want to… were you trying to, um. Were you trying to hurt yourself? Is this, like, a self-harm thing? Because I won’t judge, I just…” He scruffed his hair. “Yeah, I’m not very good at this shit. Are you… OK?” He winced and looked at Loki sideways, almost as if he thought Loki would strike him for his question.

“No, Stark,” said Loki, his voice sounding very distant. “I am not OK.”

“Yeah, I kinda… got that.” Stark sat on his haunches and rubbed his face. “You know what? We need a load of breakfast. I’m thinking pastries and donuts, something that won’t go cold or soggy, and then I think you should tell me all about it. I mean, I can’t promise I’ll be any help.” He winced again. “Honestly, I’ll probably be shit. Like, worse than nothing. I’m not… the best listener. Or the best friend. But…” he shrugged and looked away like he didn’t care at all. “Yeah, croissants! JARVIS, could you order us, eh, I dunno, one of everything from Belle Maison?”

“Of course, Sir,” JARVIS replied.

Loki looked up in the direction of the voice. He had been introduced to JARVIS the night before, but this morning, after a night of somewhat effective sleep, he could cling to the fascination sparking in his chest, distract himself. “Is your companion made of magic?” he asked.

“What, JARV? Nah - or, well, he’s an AI - artificial intelligence. He’s made out of computer code and electronics and… stuff.”

“I blush, Sir,” said JARVIS dryly.

Stark just smirked. “I’ll show you the bots in a minute, it might make a bit more sense then. Assuming you’re still up for a bit of research in a while?”

Loki felt the cold flood through his system once more, ridiculous for a Frost Giant. He had forgotten during Stark’s treatment of him this morning that he was little more than a prisoner here. He was Stark’s research project, and nothing more - this had not been kindness, but a care for one’s tools. Loki summoned up a professional mask and nodded.

Stark blinked, his own smile faltering. “OK… OK, if you’re sure? Anyway. For now, do you want a coffee or something? I need coffee, I’m not human without the first one of the morning.”

Loki narrowed his eyes at him. “Hyperbole?” he asked.

Stark winked at him. “Only just. C’mon, Billy Goat Gruff, let me hook you up with the good stuff.”

Loki had hoped that the distraction of breakfast and coffee would make Stark forget his demand that they talk, but once they’d eaten a couple of the sweet treats, he tapped his fingernails on the polished stone of the high table he called a breakfast bar. “So, Loki-Doki, you wanna tell me your story? How did you end up in a crater on another planet causing snow in the desert?”

Loki closed his eyes for just a moment, put his pastry down on the plate and clenched his hands into fists under the table. “As you wish,” he said, his voice strained.

Stark frowned. “Hey, no, it’s fine if you don’t wanna tell me, you know? I just… thought it might…” He scrubbed his hair again. “I dunno, help? People are always asking me if I want to talk, I just thought it was the done thing, or something. You don’t have to.”

“No, I am yours to command.”

Stark made a face. “Not really, though.” His eyes suddenly widened. “Holy shit. Holy… did I say something? Was there a culture clash here? Have I like… I didn’t sign you up to be my indentured servant or some bullshit, did I?”

Loki peered up at him, surprised at himself that his head had ducked so low, that his shoulders were so hunched over. “You said you would give me sanctuary in exchange for experiments…”

“I did?”

“You did imply something along those lines, Sir,” JARVIS interjected.

Stark pressed his hands to his cheeks. “What the fuck? Why didn’t you tell me, JARV?”

“I didn’t realise that Master Loki would take the combination of words in such a literal way. My apologies, Sir. And to Master Loki.”

Loki frowned. “You did not… but why would you take me in if not to-”

“I mean, sure, I wanted to study you,” Stark wailed. “But only if you wanted to find stuff out too, or like, show off… I don’t want you to be here against your will, holy shit, have I kidnapped you? Oh my god, I’m so sorry, shit!”

Loki blinked, shocked. Stark was apologising? To him? And in such distress! But Loki was nothing to him, here he was not even a prince, why would Stark care about whether or not Loki would choose to be with him? “I don’t… you do not have to…”

“I mean, I thought we were just gonna do some cool science together, I had no idea I was dragging you here like some sort of a threat, am I SHIELD in this situation? Oh my god, I’m basically Agent, guh, I’m gonna be sick, JARVIS!” He turned to Loki with wild eyes. “I am really, really sorry.”

Loki stared at him. There was a warmth in his chest, a spreading feeling he barely recognised. When was the last time someone had apologised to him? Someone of consequence, not a servant or a subject - and even then, they would always do so with gritted teeth. Loki knew he was unpopular. He’d never attempted to change that - it had always seemed so immutable a fact. Loki the trickster, don’t trust him, don’t listen, don’t spend any time near him in case he turns you into a goat.

“I would… I would like to stay,” he said, and he tried to hide a wince at how vulnerable his voice sounded. “I am interested in your science. In our differences.”

“Really?” Stark said, freezing in his distressed motions. “Are you sure, though? You’re not just saying that because I’ve, like, activated some hospitality clause I didn’t know about? You’re choosing to--”

“I am choosing, freely,” he said, swallowing and looking up at Stark. “If I am welcome, still?”

Stark’s face broke into a wide grin. “Hell, yeah, you’re welcome!” He let out a long breath. “Phew, god, that was awful!”

Loki’s lip quirked up. “Why was it so awful?”

“Well, I don’t know what life’s like on your planet or whatever, but we humans don’t like coercing other people.” He made a face. “Well, the non-assholes don’t. Yeah, actually, scrap that? I don’t like coercing people. I can’t talk for the rest of them.”

Loki grinned. “Your realm is not so different from mine, in that case. It sounds as if there are plenty of assholes in both.”

“I mean, honestly, I probably count as one of the assholes most of the time.” Tony shrugged. “Hey, do you want to go down to the lab now? I can show you the bots, and we can find out what your alien biology looks like on my holos.”

And just like that, Loki was reminded what he was, his freakish blue skin, the horns, the demonic red of his eyes. He held himself still, trying not to wince, trying not to react, for how could he explain this? He would just have to control his expressions, focus on the science. Because perhaps there would be something in Stark’s ‘lab’ which would help him to find his way back to his old - no, his true form.

But Stark stopped mid-sentence. “No? What? What is it? We won’t do anything you don’t want to,” he said, biting his bottom lip again.

Had he always been this obvious? No-one in Asgard would ever have noticed, but Stark had spotted his reticence at once - and Loki had been actively trying to hide it. Had his masks ever been as strong as he had believed? Or had nobody ever been truly looking? Loki stared at Stark, amazed at the perceptiveness of this small, sparkling mortal. “It’s…”

“I’m serious, Loki, we won’t do anything you don’t want to, OK?” Stark said, holding his gaze. “If there’s anything you don’t like, we’ll stop, no matter how far through the process we are, if there’s anything you don’t even like the look of, we won’t do it. And of course, I’ll put myself through everything you do - like, except for actually doing magic, ‘cause I can’t. Oh, and I can’t go into an MRI because of this,” he added, tapping the centre of his chest over the odd glow. “But you don’t have to do that either.”

Loki searched his face for any hint of a trick, any lie, and found only compassion. He swallowed hard. “I do not look like this,” he said, his voice nothing more than a croak. “I mean… not usually.” He looked down at his hands, clenching them into fists and feeling the sharp, obsidian nails digging into his skin. “I was Aesir - I am Aesir. I must be. But… during my brother’s coronation, I just… this happened. I turned into this… this monster, and now… now my magic is different, cold…” he took a deep, shuddering breath, the fear sending icy tendrils through every nerve. He looked at the table and gasped. Frost swirled out from every contact point with his skin, and he jerked his hands back in horror.

“Hey, hey, it’s OK,” Stark said, holding his hands out, placating the beast once more. “It’s OK.” He took a deep breath. “Hey, I know we said we didn’t have to talk, but do you want to tell me about it? And then… maybe we can get you back to normal?”

Tags from last chapter: @aformingsiren, @sketch953, @massivelandthingdonkey, @angrysockpuppetnoises, @ultra-rare-pegacorn, @redramzi, @senpaiweird, @giggling-breeze, @rarepair-collector, @saturnjuice, @kuree06 <3

[icharchivist]

I’m starting back classes in 2 days and i admit i’m probably starting to freak out a little a h ah a h and that makes me self reflect again (i’ll find out how to get back to a therapist once the school year will be officially rolling bc i’ll sure need it a ha ha but in the meantime onto the readmores of the depth of my blog)

and it just... guh I’ve stopped going to any classes about 3 years ago exactly? Like, gave up completely, and that followed mostly that when i had a breakdown about 3 years ago i was having panic attacks all the time at the uni and ended up having hard case of... at least i’ll say “zoning out” bc i was panicking, except i was zoning out in the middle of the road and that’s STRAIGHT UP not a good time when you’re realizing you’ve almost been hit 3 times in 10 mins by a car bc of that man ✌

Like begining 2015 there was so much issues with my father back then, that’s when i cut ties, but i had that major breakdown i didn’t recover properly from, that had me eventually stop my studies back then and one of the reasoning was specifically “i cannot handle the stress of class on top of stress of my personal life” (which included the fact my family at home was always super toxic and honestly the more time i spend away from my ex-step-dad the most i realize how much unhealthy coping mechanisms i took just to try to survive with him at home while it drained all of my energy)

Like one of the things was that i would get yelled at if i didn’t do the dishes/wasn’t doing the grocery shopping or all sort of things and it just that i came back from school too exhausted + with my father stuff I legit couldn’t handle those stuff, so i threw out school so at least I could do the stuff at home i would get yelled at if i didn’t do, so at least i wouldn’t be stressed on that angle.

And that’s pretty fucked up to think it was one of my motivations back then ah ah ha h but survival y’all ✌

The thing is that then i stopped going to classes for 6 months so, then i started my art school bc i couldn’t stay without classes, problem is that my health got far worse back then with multiple sicknesses due to stress adding up and getting worse with the stress of school and of my dad and of the fact it was still bad at home, and the fact i straight up didn’t like the people i was in class with?? I mean they were fine and i was social with them, it was a peaceful environment but i was more kinda tolerating this and just.. trying not to bound much with people. And hey that worked out i have absolutly no idea who any of the people i’ve spent a full year with are doing ✌

The thing is that after that i tried the history uni and it’s when i started to have the panic attacks and zoning out and after one week i was just... too terrified to be around people. Like straight up terrified, i couldn’t talk to anyone, i was trembling when I was near my classrooms, I was on the verge of crying everytime someone addressed to me somehow, it was so so so so bad.

Anyway i dropped out that course after a week so y EAH and then i didn’t go to school the years that followed, bc there was administrations problems with the courses i wanted to take and i was asking help from my parents bc i was petrified at the idea of dealing with them and my parents didn’t help at all.

And tbh it would have been the same this year too over the fact it still completely petrifies me, except that this time my best friends helped me out organize, so i actually got through with the problems, and they’re fantastic and i love them-

But yeah now i’m thinking about the fact that it’s very likely the toxicness of my family made me close in and i started to be terrified of hanging around people i didn’t know well, that there is this sort of emotional effort to make that at least on top of the work i had to do with my family was too much. 

And now i’ve left my family, i still have to deal with the nastiness of my dad and god i’m so tired, i ended up blocking him the other day but it’s getting so bad and i’m so tired we can just say it’s ANOTHER trial because OF COURSE it is JUST ANOTHER ONE, because we’re a NORMAL FAMILY and *bangs head on table* guh not the point of that post, but that had been heavy on me lately there is so much annoying stuff happening familywise. 

And yeah I mean i’ve left but i’m far from healed from anything either and i just...

I know i’m good at talking with people sometimes, creating non threatening environment and all, being friendly, but i’m just panicked being around people. 

I live in a student room and the kitchen is common to the whole stair and i’ve been avoiding it for about a month. A. month. Granted also bc i don’t know how to make part of it works and i’m too stressed up to ask for help, but that’s... that’s part of the problem. I went there a couple of times but if i can avoid it, i do.

Anytime i needed to get cooking i came back at my mom’s place when she was away bc i’m terrified to just... spend time around people i don’t know. 

and i don’t know exactly where it’s from, bc like i mean i’ve been bullied all my way until high school but highschool were the most fantastic years i had socially speaking and i really opened up much more and managed to be far more social during that time, but then... then I guess just having dropped everything to spend all my time handling my family’s temper tantrum and be always hyperaware of their emotions in order to adjust to how i was supposed to work around that just ended up making me project that on everyone i didn’t know originally. 

And it suuucks and i’m going back to school in 3 days and i’m just starting to be stressed out over the fact i’ll sit in class around people and i don’t want to be around people and that a h ah ah ah a h 

and the worst is that i think i actually projected this attitude of mine online those past few years?! 

I’ve always been more social online, more ready to talk and all, hell especially this  blog, but while i have absolutly no problem with people coming to me, or even sometimes talking to people i’ve already grown used to see, then i’ve also grown terrified of like /posting in the tags/, of being seen by people outside of my comfort zone. 

And it... really wasn’t the case before but it is now and i wonder if that’s an extension of the fact i just... tightened my comfort zone with the year to the point of being absolutly panicked about coming out of it.

Like.. i guess it’s already good that I ended up moving away in a place with a lot of people, and man i feel so strong when i actually do manage to go to the kitchen and don’t completely freak out when there are people there.

But YEAH school back in 3 days that will be fun i hadn’t been around people in 3 years and last time i’ve been around huge group of people i had massive panic attacks, that’ll be fun that’ll be fun that’ll be fun. 

So that’s fun, that’s new, that’s something i’ll need to end up dealing with bc this is Not Reassuring but yeah i’ve kinda completely ignored that I had this social problem going on bc i had a hundred of others things to deal with and i’m just now realizing that huh yeah i’ve acted weirdly socially lately i probably need to get that checked and dig in to try to figure out what caused it and eventually try to stop being petrified for no rational reasons other than just... living in the same space as people terrifies me for some reasons.

That’s cool that’s cool that’s cool ✌ ✌ ✌ 

I mean that was to be expected that now that i’m getting out of the toxic situation that shaped my life i have to figure out where that left me and recover from it but i’m straight up not having a good time right now  ✌

anyway meanwhile i’ll just, keep staying in comfort zone with that blog as it is, no need to try to “force myself out of it”, bad plan, not healthy enough for that and i need to do that irl before doing it online, so that’s fun that’s fun, gotta need to find an appointment with a therapist asap, this is gonna be fun wee  ✌

[gaypasta]

do you want fries with that?

chapter 13 Read on Ao3 Chapter Directory

The quiet blanket of darkness shrouded the quarry, enveloping the group of teenagers in their own bubble, untouched by the universe. The fire that Mike had managed to get blazing, even with the dampness of Winter settling in every tree branch and log, had set a warm glow around the Marsh, the light from the flames gently bouncing off the thick forest that surrounded them. Their own little pocket of Derry that was just for them.

The little clearing of the Marsh had quickly become the group’s usual hang-out-spot, so much so that all of them - bar Ben, who was working - had biked through the frosted streets of the town, trekked down through iced leaves and mud, with only a pair fo flashlights between them and the moon peeking from behind the trees to guide their way (not that they needed it, they knew the area surrounding the Quarry and Marsh like the back of their hand). It was cold, being December, but none of them had ever queried their collective decision to sit in the great outdoors - all too fond of their time spent there to ever really contest it.

So there they were sat, a group of somewhat misfit teenagers all bundled up in thick coats and scarves and whatnot - thankfully the thickness of the forest around them managed to keep some of the heat from the fire from completely dissipating into the air, and their coats were thick enough to fend off any shivers or teeth chattering they would have. Stan noted that even Richie had forgone his usual outfit of shorts and t-shirt for a frayed pair of jeans that rose high on his ankles - clearly he had dug them from the pits of his closet - and a heavy knit sweater that hung off of his frame so much that Stan had originally mistaken it for a blanket at first.

Richie was sat on the ground, opposite where Eddie and Stan were sitting on the soft fabric of the camping loveseat that Mike had adorned them with one evening after helping his Uncle clear out their garage. Previously, they had all sat on the cold ground, or fought over the log which allowed their pants to avoid the worst of the mud and moss stains - there hadn’t really been much of a fight in reality, just some light-hearted complaints as Eddie and Stan claimed their seats, sat close as to not fall off, shoulders usually pressed together.

The camping couch had been the first addition, a mossy green fold-out seat, that had definitely seen better days.It came with small holes in the arms, netted in mesh to hold drinks presumably,  Stan usually pulls off his wool mittens and folds them in it instead, hating the way the fabric rubs against his wrists - which were burning more than usual tonight, after Stan scratching at his left one earlier in an effort to calm his need to skirt around and fix everything.

The next addition had been a plain white plastic deck chair, small splinters running through the back and a couple of strange stains that didn’t quite rub out under Eddie’s furious scrubbing with disinfectant wipes. Richie refused to tell anyone where he found it. He stole it from his neighbour’s front yard after they ran over his bike in their shitty pickup truck, he had told Stan later. Stan doubted they would even notice it was gone. Ben had procured two camping chairs from his parents, who were happy enough to part with them, they were in better shape than the one that Eddie and Stan shared, but they were smaller - only fitting one person at a time. Sometimes Stan or Eddie would sit in those, but today they had sat down together, enjoying each other’s company.

In total there were five seats for their rag-tag group to sit on, or seven if the large log was included. Richie still maintained the ground was way better, being ‘one with nature and all that shit’. Stan knew he just liked to pick tufts of grass from the ground - which is exactly what he was doing now, tugging at the cold grass and plucking it out of the ground, letting it fall onto a small pile on the thick plaid blanket that Bill had rolled out for him.

Richie was in an animated discussion with Bill, who was sifting through his beaten up backpack, while Richie was fiddling with the grass in a pointed effort not to meet eyes with Stan, who was watching the two with a twinge of a headache in his forehead. Stan wasn’t sure why he was staring at Richie with such venomosity - he wanted Richie to know he was mad at him, but with the way Richie shifted to face Bill made Stan painfully aware that Richie could tell he was mad at him, and was purposely avoiding him. Stan clutched his thermos in his hands, feeling the ridges of the handle ache into his fingers a little.

Eddie eyed him up from under his thick wooly hat that was so large on his small head it kept falling over his eyes, his knees up to his chest, holding his tiny hot water bottle into his stomach - an attempt to ward off hypothermia, which his Mother had told him he would catch if he so much as left the house during Winter. “What’s the matter with you?” Eddie quipped, sounding mildly annoyed which everyone had grown to accept was just the way Eddie’s voice sounds, holding no real contempt.

“Nothing. Why do you ask?”

“You're about to geiser your fucking chicken soup.”

Stan forcibly relaxed his hold and turned to meet Eddie’s eyes, not that he could see anything more than a row of small dark lashes from the bottom of his eyes, “It’s tomato soup.”

Eddie mumbled a whatever and changed to topic of conversation to criticism of Bill’s choice of snacks for this evening.

“Are you fucking kidding, you know I can’t eat that much sugar! I’ll go into sugar overload or whatever and fall into a diabetic coma - are you trying to fucking kill me, Bill?”

Bill laughed as he laid out the crackers and chocolate on his blanket, “I duh-don’t think that’s how it works. Besides, you’re not even duh-duh-diabetic.”

“Yes I am, I can’t eat much sugar - don’t you remember when all I had in my lunchbox in fucking elementary school was a cheese sandwich and sliced cucumber - I wasn’t even allowed an apple because it sent my sugar levels up!”

“Juh-just try it?” Bill pleaded, stabbing a marshmallow onto what looked to be a piece of barbeque equipment, Bill must have noticed Eddie eyeing the tool with disgust because he quickly followed up, “I washed it and it’s duh-disinfected.”

Eddie opened his mouth in another complaint, slapping Bill’s outstretched arm away as he tried to poke Eddie with the marshmallow.

“You didn’t seem all that concerned with sugar when you were knocking back cocktails like a stripper in Vegas.”

“Yes, dickweed and then I passed out.”

“Puh-pretty sure that wuh-was more the alcohol's fault than the sh-sugar.”

“That’s a lie!” Eddie flustered, stumbling over his words as he does when he gets agitated. Beverly laughed from between Richie and Stan, perched with her legs crossed in the stolen chair. Eddie turned with a sharp, “What!”

“Eddie, you probably don’t even remember climbing up Richie like a monkey.” She said and judging by Richie’s face - he didn’t either. Beverly laughed again at Richie, “Oh my God - Bill definitely took a picture  - I think he took about a hundred.”

Eddie’s face fumed a violent pink, “I didn’t do that.”

“Awww, Eds! You couldn’t keep your hands off me, just wanted to climb me like a tree you little devil, don’t worry - if you wanted my bananas all you had to do was ask.” Bill laughed and elbowed Richie lightly, “Ow - shit - I don’t want to hear you complaining about me being boney, Big Bill - I feel like I just got stabbed in the ribs.” Bill elbowed him again.

“You wuh-were asking Stan what it felt like to be tuh-tuh-tall, then you just stuh-starting climbing Richie, to guh-get onto his shu-shu-shu-shoulders.”

“You ended up hitting your head on the doorframe and started crying, then passed out like three minutes later.” Mike finished for Bill, who had started to choke on his words as he tried to bristle down laughter.

Stan could hardly remember that, replaying it in his head was like watching TV from ten feet underwater, but he found himself biting his own laughter at the mental image nonetheless.

“I fucking hate you all. Give me the stupid marshmallow and shut the fuck up.”

Bill handed everyone out their marshmallows, all but Eddie and Stan getting theirs pierced onto a clean-enough looking stick, clearly snapped off from a tree. Stan wasn’t overly partial to sweet things, but he toasted his marshmallow nonetheless. Mike was telling Bill all about a baby lamb he had helped be born, pretending not to find it amusing when Eddie blanched and grew a little green at the details, while Bill looked at him in awe, his face interested and completely drawn into everything he was hearing. Bill never had anything but love for his friends painted across his face, Stan briefly thinks that whatever girl Bill ends up falling in love with just might be the most loved girl on the planet. His eyes flicker to where Richie was lying sideways on the log, fully leaning on Bill and conversing erratically with Beverly about some show they had both been keeping up to date with, his cigarette leaving trails of orange amber in the air as he wildly gestured, almost burning himself a couple of times.

Stan feels slightly out of place, sitting where he was, because for the last week or two - ever since he and Richie had began sneaking beer and wine and all sorts into their bedrooms and kissing behind the secrecy of their closed doors - they had sat beside each other. It had earned a look from Eddie as Stan gestured Richie onto the foldable double seat, but nothing was said as Eddie sat on one of the single fold-out chairs, rubbing it with a disinfectant wipe before sitting down. Stan feels slightly lost without Richie shouldering him to encourage him into a conversation, or slinging an arm obnoxiously around his shoulder to draw Stan into whatever shitty monologue he was doing. His eyes followed Richie’s cigarette and he found himself tasting the nicotine from Richie’s breath.

He swallowed as the thoughts of Richie’s dirty cigarette breath panting into his own started swimming through his head. He tried to roll the tension from his shoulders as he imagines Richie panting his dirty cigarette breath into someone else’s mouth.

Richie catches his eye for a moment, his mouth stuttered a little around his story before he furrowed his brows and made a point of looking away from Stan. It didn’t help Stan get any less mad at him.

Stan was finding himself brewing over the incident that had happened at work, the very thing causing the current tension between the two. When Stan returned from outside to continue work, Richie just sailed past him with a cigarette dangling from his lips without looking at him. In fact, Richie hadn’t looked at Stan the rest of the shift. It made Stan livid. It wasn’t enough that Richie was using him as a practice fuck, but Richie was trying to drag his name through the mud just because he’s getting pissy about everything.

“Well, I think we see why Stan never does any of the cooking.” Eddie’s voice snapped Stan out of his trance, he had been staring at Richie - who had looked up at the noise and gave him a strange look. Stan’s marshmallow was burnt - to put it lightly - to shit.

“I’ll remember that when it’s my turn to bring the snacks,” Stan said, scraping the burnt food off of his prong against a rock in the fire pit, wincing at the long white strings of sugar that connected the two - it reminds him of when him and Richie pull apart after kissing and their lips are joined by a string of their mixed saliva. Gross.

Not gross.

Stan’s stomach twisted as Richie let out a loud “OOOOOOOOOO - Eddie’s favourite chocolate brownies? Withheld!”

Stan usually baked his own goods to bring down, it relaxed him and it gave him something to busy his hands with. His friends have tried his food enough between Stan bringing in something to sell in the dessert counter every weekend, to him whipping up some pastries or cakes to bring down to the Marsh. And true to Richie’s statement - Eddie was borderline obsessed with Stan’s brownies - always moaning obscenely when he ate, much to the joy of Riche and the exasperation of literally everyone else. Somehow his ‘diabetes’ was always forgotten about those days.

Eddie’s face was instantly bright with panic, “Well - I - no, right - Shut up Richie, God you’re such a tool - cooking and baking are completely different, right?” He looked around the group for support, all of them feeding quickly into this little bit they had started and looking deep in thought.

“I don’t know, Eddie - it doesn’t seem very convincing…” Beverly started.

“I buh-believe Stan has the right to withhold any buh-buh-baked goods he sees fuh-fit.”

“You’re the judge, Stan.”

Stan hummed in mock thought, tapping the pad of his finger against his chin as Eddie vibrated next to him, “Both sides have compelling arguments, this might take a while to reach a fair decision.”

“Oh wow! Stanley on the fence about something, what a shock.” Richie said, lowly, wiping a bit of chocolate from his smore off his mouth. He missed a bit, Stan noticed - just on the corner. Richie met his eyes and forced out a laugh to punctuate his statement. Stan knew better of course, as the rest of them let out small chuckles at Richie’s playful jab - Stan knew there was little playfulness behind it.

“Is Richie Tozier making obsolete observations in an effort to make himself the center of attention? It’s been a while since we’ve seen that.” Stan forced with a sordid smile, biting his tongue a little.

Richie scowled at him for a second, just quick enough so that no one but Stan - who hadn’t lost eye contact - would notice, “Stan the man gets off on a good one. Let’s roll out the red carpet for that one.” Richie lightened his tone and mimed himself unfurling a large carpet, shaking it and laying it in Stan’s direction. Stan shot him the finger in response.

The rest of the night had followed pretty much the same pattern, Richie and Stan throwing digs at each other under the guise of jokes, with laughter in their voice but venom in their eyes as they stared each other down.

“Aw, your Mom’s a bitch? Sorry to hear Eds - but hey! Look on the bright side, she can’t be any more of a bitch than Stan.”

“Beverly - we know you’re not a slut - or whatever those assholes in your class call you. That title goes to Richie.”

“Hey, Stan - wanna show us how much of your dick the Rabbi cut off?”

“Stop molesting Mike - none of us know how many STD’s you’re carrying.” “If that stick up your ass was any deeper it would be tickling your prostate.”

“No, I don’t think those are jokes, Eddie. I think Richie is just truly that desperate that he would fuck anything with legs at this point.”

“Do you guys reckon that Rabbi’s diddle kids the same way priests do? Maybe that’s why Stan’s such a frigid.”

The two quipped back and forth, raising the occasional look of shock from Bill or Eddie - who had known the two for so long that they knew when both Richie and Stan had overstepped the unspoken line in the sand. They said nothing, however - just shooting curious glances at the two and continuing the conversation along its way.

It wasn’t until Richie made comments about the small string of bruises on Stan’s neck that Stan had desperately tried to cover during the week that Stan had decided he had taken enough of this petty back-and-forth bullshit. He’s had enough of Richie painting him as something he’s not, enough of Richie being bitchy, enough of Richie saying shit just to get a reaction out of him and his friends. It wasn’t fucking fair.

So he had stood up, grabbed Richie’s arm mid-smoke and pulled him out of the clearing, out of the Marsh and downhill, just far enough that the wind wouldn’t carry their voices and concealed enough in the trees that they would muffle them too. Richie had tried to tug his arm free and remain seated, but Stan threatened to dislocate his shoulder and he followed suit with a look of displeasure.

Stan all but threw Richie’s arm out of his hand when they reached what Stan deemed a good enough place to talk. Richie looked offendedly at his arm, rubbing it gently and not meeting Stan’s eyes.

“What is your fucking problem .” Stan seethed.

Richie had the decency to look somewhat sheepish as he backed himself into a tree and laid his weight against it, trying to shrink a little under Stan’s eyes, which were sharp and small, squinting at Richie with anger. Richie didn’t respond but he had the look on his face of wanting to say something, but deciding against it.

“Richie, you can’t push my buttons all day, embarrass me, point out my fucking hickeys to my friends - which, by the way, none of them had even noticed - only to decide to stop the trash talk when I’m asking you why. Asking you why you’re acting so weird about everything all of a sudden.”

Stan stopped himself before he went any further. Not looking to rant at Richie anymore than he just wanted Richie to stop being weird. All this aggression and spite was coming out of left field, and between Stan trying to deal with the sinking feeling in his chest every time he thinks about Richie moving on, to the clutching of his stomach he gets whenever he thinks of Richie in ways that no one else has seen him and with the addiction he’s found himself within Richie’s mouth - it was leaving him stressed and worn thin. His disorder had fed into the stress and he found himself sleepless most nights because he could swear the gentle ticking of his watch fell out of beat every twenty-three seconds. He was confused, he was upset, he was angry and he just wanted his best friend to be there with him, side-by-side like they had been.

Richie cricked his neck a little, making Stan cringe when it made a cracking sound. Richie stays silent for a moment, but the look on his face makes Stan let him - Richie looks like he’s mulling over his words, opening his mouth every so often just to close it and start the process again.

It was rare that Richie really thought before he spoke.

“I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I was just messing around.” Richie looked like he didn’t even try to believe his words.

“Don’t bullshit me, Rich.” Richie’s eyes flickered to Stan’s at the nickname, prompting him to pull out another cigarette - having lost his previous one when Stan yanked his arm a little too hard and he had to drop it to regain balance. “You - you can’t just decide to start lying to me now.”

Richie struggled to get a flame from his lighter, twisting his body against the wind a little to catch a pocket of still air. “What am I lying about, then?”

“You tell me.”

“I don’t get it.” Richie took a drag, face relaxing with the rush of nicotine.

Stan moved closer towards him, only maybe four feet between them now. He could see the tobacco curling as it burned in his cigarette. “Stop it. I’m not going to play this game - I’m not playing cat and mouse with you so that you can skirt around the topic and confuse me into dropping it.” Richie shot him a look, “Don’t look at me like that - you know that I understand how you work. I know that you’d love to pretend not to know what I’m talking about, dodge my questions until I get frustrated and then you feed into it, making comments and being a trashmouth until I walk away. I know your game plan, Rich and you know me well enough to know I won’t play it. ”

Richie’s face bled from a look of shock into a small smile. A gentle smile that comes naturally to your face when you’re content, like when you step into a particularly warm patch or sunlight, or when you smell something that reminds you of a good memory, or when you’re sifting through old photos of you and your friends. A small smile that isn’t overly conscious or prominent on the features, but a comfort nonetheless.

“Of course you do.” Richie looked at Stan with an atypical softness, Stan felt like he was under a microscope for a moment, “I just - uh,” Richie trailed off, taking a drag of his cigarette and blinking in thought, “It’s just messing with me a little, us going from two innocent little church boys who want to do nothing more than make their Mommys proud to fuckin’ like rabbits in heat. Forgive me for getting a little whiplash, Staniel.”

Stan’s face heated a little, “We had sex once.”

Richie laughed and winked, taking another drag - for dramatics probably.

“I- is that the issue?” Stan’s stomach had started to hurt a bit, “We can stop. You didn’t have to get all defensive and bitchy about it, all you had to do was say, Rich.”

Richie almost choked on the smoke in his lungs, “No! No, we uh - we don’t need to stop.” He eyed Stan with a little uncertainty, “Unless you do?”

Stan shook his head, toeing the ground with his thick winter ankle boots, “Not really. It’s fun, right?” Stan met Richie’s eyes then, and they both felt a small smirk creep onto their faces before Stan quickly looked away, his face heating up - God it’s cold, no wonder his face is heating up.

“Yeah, it is.”

Stan cleared his throat, “But - why are you getting weird about it, then? It was your bright idea, dumbass.”  Richie shrugged, relaxing into the tree, “Hey - don’t get complacent, Richie. We’re not done.”

“I told you why I was acting out, now let’s kiss and make up.”

“No - I want you to apologize.”

Richie blinked, hand falling from where he had gone to grab Stan’s arm. “What for?”

Stan took a deep breath, “For calling me gay in front of my friends, Richie.”

Richie’s jaw clenched a little, his words were spoken forcefully, like he was trying his best to force them out of his throat, “Oh I didn’t realize being gay was so disgusting -”

“Don’t be a dick about it. You know what would happen if rumors spread, Richie. I’m not just some kid, hell, I’m not even just some Jewish kid - I’m the Rabbi’s son. This fucking town hates us enough, what do you think they’ll do if they find out the Rabbi’s son is gay? What do you think all the higher ups in the Synagogue will think? It would ruin us.”

Richie bit his tongue, “But you’re not gay, right?”

“Obviously.” Stan’s fingers dug into his forearms.

“Obviously.” Richie said, a sardonic smile on his face. “So, what? Do you think one of our friends is going to go spread around Derry a rumor that you like dick? Does that fit the script of this little fantasy movie you’ve got playing in your head?”

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

“No! I don’t, Stan. Because you’re the one getting so paranoid at the fucking horror that any of our friends might possibly think you’re gay. I don’t care if you like dick or not - and neither do they - do you really think Big Bill is going to give a fucking hoot if you start swinging for the other team? Hell, Bill probably wouldn’t even bat an eye if you got down and started giving him a fucking handy - he would just give you a great ol’ pat on the back for being ever so brave.”

Stan stepped closer to Richie and gave him a light shove, “Stop it.”

Richie glared and flicked his cigarette off to the side, barely half smoked, “Stop what? Telling you the truth? The truth that not a single one of us will give a shit if you’re gay, if I’m gay - if fucking Mike’s horse is gay - the only person that has an issue with it is you.” Richie stabbed a finger into the center of Stan’s chest.

“I’m not gay, and I don’t hate gays, either. The reason it irritates me is because it’s gross. I don’t like you fucking talking about me and sex at all.Keep our fucking sex life out of your trashmouth and in the bedroom.”

Richie moved his finger from a point and just … rested his palm on Stan’s chest. “Ha - like it’s our dirty little secret, Stanley?”

Stan’s chest tightened at that, a flush of heat washing over him so fast it made him a little dizzy, he found himself shifting slightly closer towards Richie without really realizing it. “Yuh-yeah.” He choked around the word, his voice cracking. Thanks a lot, puberty.

Richie seemed to catch onto that, a knowing smirk creeping onto his face. The same smile Richie usually shoots Stan after he locks his bedroom door, creeping over to Stan who’s sitting patiently on his bed and leaving Stan all but ravaged in a matter of minutes. Shirt collar unbuttoned down to his chest, lips swollen from gentle tugs and light bites, neck sheening with saliva - and sometimes light peppers of blue and black - if Stan was particularly inebriated either from the alcohol or the need coursing through his veins.

Stan barely had a moment to stall himself before Richie grabbed his coat, pulling him forward to crash into his mouth. Stan immediately becoming pliant under Richie’s mouth, following his movements and moving in tangent with him as though it was a dance they had rehearsed for months on end. Richie pulled away soon after pulling Stan forward, too soon.

“Is this okay?”

Stan found himself moving towards Richie in impulse, lips just brushing against Richie’s every time he lets out a short puff of breath. “Huh?” Great contribution, Stanley. Stellar performance.

Richie kissed into him lightly, a smile ghosting his lips, “We’re one-hundred percent sober. Does that not bother you?”

“Didn’t last time.”

Richie paused for a moment, a sentence clearly dancing on his lips before he swallowed it, taking Stan’s mouth in the process, “Alright.”

They kissed for a while, open-mouthed with Richie sucking on Stan’s bottom lip every now and again, the cold air nipping at the wetness of their lips, Richie’s hands still grappled in the front of Stan’s coat  - as if Stan would melt away into the icy ground if he let go. Stan doesn't think he could move away from Richie if God himself pulled at him. A tongue would occasionally trace Stan’s lips - which he would open - only for Richie to trace his lips again and go back to dancing his lips over Stan. Fucking tease.

“You like this being a dirty little secret, huh?” Richie said, words murmured into Stan’s mouth - who let out a groan in response, “You like running around with your best friend in secret?”

Stan groaned a little louder as Richie pulled away only to move to kiss along his jaw, working his way from Stan’s chin to his ear, before pausing and burying his head into Stan’s temple. Stan could feel him mumbling something into his skin, but Richie just shook his head when Stan asked what it was. The thought was pushed out of Stan’s head when Richie gave a firm kiss to his temple - making Stan’s stomach twist heavily. Then he imagined it. Them touching, mouths wet against each other, Richie clutching onto Stan’s coat and face buried in Stan’s hair. Everything -  but instead of Stan it was someone else and the twisting in his stomach turned into lurching, a hollow almost painful feeling. He twisted his head, shaking Richie off his temple - who frowned at him through his stupid coke-bottle glasses.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Stan knew it was ridiculous, selfish even, to bring up. He had no right to feel like Richie owed him anything, he knew that this was for fun, that it was just a bit of fooling around for whoever their future partners may be. Stan briefly wonders how much of this could be applied to a woman. He shook the thought.

Richie looked unimpressed, “Don’t make me repeat your big spiel about you knowing when I’m lying back to you - because I will. Well, not word for word, cuz, to be honest, I wasn’t really paying that much attention - but the same sentiment, yeah?”

Sten just stared at Richie, trying to fumble over words in his head, trying to gather all the rogue thoughts in his head and staple them into a cohesive sentence, with Richie’s stupid fucking face half an inch away.

“It’s just uh -” Stan stopped himself, not quite knowing why he started with nothing to say. Richie made a ‘go on’ motion with his hand, “It’s stupid.”

“I know you are but what am I?” Stan pinched his neck roughly, “Ow - who pinches a neck what the fuck - sorry, go on.”

“No.”

Richie looked amused and painted a stupid puppy-dog look on his face, “But what abwout us being fwiends? Fwiends don’t keep secwets…”

“I’ll tell you under the conditions that you never do that again.”

“Deal.”

“I just - it feels weird that we’re doing … this stuff,” He gestured between their mouths, “and someday we’ll be doing it with other people. It’s just a bit strange to think about.”

Richie looked somewhere between aghast and intrigued, “Like… a threesome?”

Stan briefly wonders if the coroner would believe Richie just choked himself to death. Yes, officer - he just wrapped his own around his neck and choked himself to death right in front of me! I have no idea how he did it. “No. Like with our future girlfriends. Or uh - boyfriend, I guess.”

Richie looked crestfallen for a moment, a strange look ghosting over his face that Stan had never seen before. It made him look much older - an appearance of seriousness and the face of someone who was far too tired for someone so young slowly took over his features. Stan didn’t move his eyes off of Richie’s face even as his friend slowly rose a hand to his face, resting his palm on his face. It was so light, Stan wondered if Richie was actually touching him at all or if it was his imagination - yet it was the most definable feeling that Stan had felt all evening. More than the harsh cold, more than the biting anger, more than the open mouthed-kisses and Richie murmuring into his mouth.

“I don’t think I could have anyone after y-” Richie shut his mouth closed, so quickly that his teeth clinked together, Stan just blinked, “You’re my best friend.” He settled with. Stan’s heart felt like it was going to beat right out of his chest and lie in a heap on the dirty ground.

“You’re my best friend too, Richie.” Even if you are a jackass.

Richie stared at Stan, in the same expression he sees Beverly staring after Ben with, or Bill after Georgie. Without leaving room for argument, it was a look of pure, unadulterated love. Stan’s heart was beating in his fucking guts when Richie placed the most gentle kiss in the world on Stan’s mouth.

“Then that’s enough for me.” Richie said it as though it was final. Like the final piece of the universe had just been slotted into place, planets aligning and stars burning and supernovas beaming, as though that single sentence was enough to stabilize everything that had happened, a final explanation and final prescription to Stan’s worries. It just made Stan’s stomach ache even worse.

Richie parted, the look wiped off his by face now, replaced with a neutral expression, if not with a little tug upwards of the lips. He tugged on Stan’s arm - parallel with how Stan had pulled on Richie’s not minutes before. Richie was laughing as he tugged Stan through the trees - almost slipping and sending them sprawling down the hill, never once loosening his grip on Stan’s arm until they made their way back to the Marsh, to be met with questioning glances.

Richie waved it off with a joke about Stan beating him up, evading the questions at hand, covering up the truth with a grin and walking effortlessly into a separate conversation. Stan thinks he’s very good at that.

Despite Richie’s loud laughter ringing out at Eddie as Mike tries to place a daisy chain on his head, while Eddie desperately tried to shake him off, there was something off about Richie. An air of sadness floated around him, his shoulders didn’t jump as much as they usually did when he laughed, his fingers constantly around a cigarette, consistently filling his lungs up with smoke without a second thought, his spare hand faintly fidgeting with the hem of his massive jumper. Richie could fool everyone else - but not Stan.

Stan briefly sees the flash of Bill’s camera, but he ignored it - the picture of Eddie with a daisy crown and a huffy face will no doubt be catered into his hands in a couple of minutes. He continues to watch Richie - who Stan had decided - is much more of an enigma than he first appears.

Stan can’t help but shake the feeling that their conversation only left him with more questions than answers, and that it had been little more than a thin sheet of wallpaper spread over a growing expanse of mildew, a cheapshot temporary cover-up of a deeper seeded issue. Stan can’t quite shake the feeling of his heart fluttering every time Richie does much of anything.

He spends the rest of the night wishing he could kiss that smudge of chocolate on the corner of his mouth off. Company be damned.

[blackpantherismyish]

One Of The Homies

Chapter One

Word Count:  1.5k (damn near 1.6)

Warning(s): Cursing, Death threat (???)

A/N: I know this been a long time coming. I started college and the shit was honestly in the back of my mind at the moment. But I’ve gotten in the grove of things so hopefully I can update more (don’t kill me if I don’t)

Small inspiration from No Scrubs by TLC (towards the end)

----

It was a warm, summer day in Oakland, California. The four friends sat on the front porch of their shared condo, smoking a blunt and reminiscing about their childhoods.

“Ayo E, you remember that time Mini knocked the wind out of yo ass when we were kids?” Cam asked, before breaking out into a fit of laughter.

“Man hell yeah,” Erik exclaimed, glancing over to his pocket-sized homie.

“Didn’t think her little ass was that damn strong,” he replied, lightly punching her in the shoulder.

“Well that’s what you get for underestimating me,” Mini responded, giggling.

10 YEARS EARLIER

“Can I sit here?” the young boy asked, standing next to the table that Sekhmet sat engulfed in her sketchbook.

“Sure,” she replied, never taking her eyes from the page.

The boy leaned on the table, staring between her hand and her face.

“My name’s Dominic, what’s yours?” he asked.

“Sekhmet,” she replied, slightly annoyed at his continued attempts at conversation.

He scrunched his nose up in disgust.

“What kind of name is that?” he asked, sitting back in his chair.

“My name, that's what kind.” Sek replied, smugly. Dominic rose from his seat and shook his head.

“Okay… Well… it was nice meeting you.” He backed away from the table, rubbing his head.

“But it wasn't nice meeting you.” Sek went back to her book and laughed to herself. Serves him right.

Dominic made his way back over to Erik, face still frowned up. Erik seemed a bit confused as to why he came back so quick.

“Dom, what's the matter? Why you frowning?” Erik sat up from his seat as Dom sat across from him and his half brother Cameron.

“Cause bruh… that girl over there was being rude and all I was tryna do was be nice and sit with her.” Dom folded his arms and sat back.

“Nah bruh. We don't tolerate disrespect over here.” Erik stood from his seat. He made his way over to the table where Sekhmet was now standing, holding her pencil and sketchbook against her chest.

“Aye.” Erik called to her. She looked back unamused. Why were these guys bothering her right now?

“Yes?” Sek asked as she shifted her weight between her feet.

“Why you had to be so rude to my friend?” Erik tilted his head to the side.

“Why couldn’t your friend ask me himself? Better yet, why can’t ya’ll just leave me alone?” Sek watched as his facial expression changed like she had flipped a switch.

“Man, just answer the question.” Erik sighed. This girl was really starting to get under his skin.. Sek stepped forward until she and Erik were only a few inches from each other. Erik towered over her. At 4’5” he was rather tall for an 8-year-old. Though she’d never admit it, she was a bit intimidated by his size. Being that she was only 3’9”, she had to crane her neck to look up at him.

“Nah,” she responded sarcastically, before turning to walk away.

Erik’s hand moved before he could think and nudged her back slightly, making her stumble forward. She whipped around and landed a blow to the middle of his chest, successfully knocking the wind out of him. For a 7-year-old, she packed quite a punch. Satisfied with herself, she turned and proceeded to walk away.

“Aye!” Erik called out to her, between his coughing fit, but it was no use. She kept on walking, leaving him to suffer alone.

A few weeks passed, Sek and the boys exchanging glances between each other in passing. Finally one day, they decided to stop ignoring each other existence and formally introduce themselves. Sitting in her usual spot under a large tree, Sekhmet did what she always did, emerged herself in her sketchbook and ignored the world around her. Humming softly, her small nimble fingers contorted the sketch pencil in a way you would think was possible for a child as young as her. The weight on the table she was sitting at shifted, causing her head to rise ever so slightly.

“Yes?” She shot a quick glance at the three boys then went back to her drawings.

“We got off of the wrong foot last time we talked and we thought it would be a good idea to try again.” Dominic looked over at Sekhmet as she placed her pencil down and closed her sketchbook.

“Sure.” She slid the book back into her bag and leaned on her fist to look at the boys.

Being the first to stick out his hand, Dominic gave Sekhmet a soft smile.

“I'm Dominic. You can call me Dom or Nic. Whichever.” He lifted his shoulders in small shrug.

“Sekhmet. But you knew that already. You can call me Sekh, Or AJ.” She put her hand in his and shook it.

“I'm Cameron. Cam for short.”

“And I'm Erik.” Erik was the last to shake her hand.

After the greetings she went back to her drawings while the 3 curious boys questioned her.

“Why are you always by yourself? You got something wrong wit you?” Dominic tilted his head down to look at what her fingers had been scribbling over. It was a decorated skull with flowers growing out of the otherwise empty eye sockets.

“I just don't like people. You 3 are lucky I haven't shoo’d you away by now.” Sek brushed eraser shavings out of her way and continued doodling.

PRESENT DAY

“Jesus you were a brutal lil girl.” Cameron laughed, blowing smoke into the air.

“The fuck you mean were, she still is a mean lil girl. She just grown now.” Erik retorted sipping from his red cup as Sekhmet smacked his chest. When she hit his chest, he nearly choked on whatever he happened to be sipping.

“Nigga shut up. You still a big bitch that get on my last nerve.” Sek rolled her eyes, sitting back in her seat.

“But you love me though.” Erik flicked Sek on the forehead as he went back to sipping from his cup.

“That’s-” Sekhmet’s voice was cut off by the sound of a car horn and the screeching of tires.

“Aye Mini!” A squeaky voice called out from the car as the tinted windows were rolled down. Rolling her eyes, she stood from her seat on the porch.

“What you want Dre?” She walked over to the car, holding the blunt between her lips.

“When you gon let me take you on a date, lil mama.” The nigga, deemed as Dre, leaned against the passenger window, brushing his hair out of the way. His head was covered in messy dreads, unlike Erik’s.

“When you get yo own car.” Sek blew smoke from her lips as Dre scoffed.

“I told you, Imma be getting my whip soon guh.” Dre waved the smoke out of his face, and looked at her.

“You been saying that for a minute.” Sek tried her best not roll her eyes in aggravation as the bullshit spilled from this man’s mouth.

“I know but I’m forreal this time.” Dre nodded as if to confirm with himself.

“You still live wit yo mama?”

“Yeah bu-”

“Dre hit me up when you finally get yo own shit.” Sek finally let her eyes roll to the back of her head.

“Bitch, How bout you hit me up when you get those 3 dicks out yo damn mouth!” As if he said a magic word, four 24k gold desert eagles pointed toward his head.

Sekhmet walked up to the window of the car and pressed the cold metal of the pistol against his forehead. Her hairs stood on end as Erik’s large presence moved up behind her. His pistol now pressed against Dre’s temple.

“Nigga you ain’t the first body I done dropped. I don’t mind adding a nigga to the list.” The color of Sek’s eyes shifted and the atmosphere changed. Taking a drag from the blunt that was between the fingers on her free hand, she blew it in his face.

“And I’m pretty sure, yo homie aint tryna have blood all in his mama whip.” Erik voice boomed and Dre’s eyes widen.

“Plus I’m pretty sure if they dicks were in my mouth, They’d be bigger than you.”

Dominic and Cameron stood a little ways behind the two with their pistols drawn and ready.

“Aight. Aight. I-I aint mean no harm. I’m sorry.” Dre pulled back from the window and he was visibly shaking.

“Thought so. Now get the fuck out my face unless you want a bullet between yo eyes just because.” Sek’s voice dripped with dominance as she stared down Dre. Dre looked over his shoulder and give his friend a slight nod and the car sped off. Putting the pistol back in her waistband like a old hood nigga would, she walked back to the porch and took her spot back in the chair she was once sitting in.

“I swear broke niggas got the most confidence.” Cameron rolled his eyes, taking his seat again.

Erik’s jaw clenched slightly as he put his gun back on safety and back in his waistband much like Sekhmet had.

“Broke niggas also get bullets to the brain the most.” Erik grumbled lowly, plopping back down into his seat.

“They broke.. So what they got to lose.” Sek let a bullet from her pistol dance between her fingers as the sun hit the gold casing.

“Other than their life?” She looked up catching the bullet in the palm of her hand.

Taglist:   @panthergoddessbast @sweetsexysavagery @blackpanthersmut @thiccdaddy-mbaku @wakandas-vibranium @wakanda-4evr  @hearteyes-for-killmonger @killmongersgurl @dreamingoftchalla @drsunshine97@thehomierobbstark @texasbama @youreadthatright @kumkaniudaku @hailerikmonger @wakanda-inspired @lunaerly @shesfromwakanda @wawakanda-btch @ange-sensuel @magic-madness-heavensin @eriknutinthispoosy @muse-of-mbaku @sicksadgen @killmvnger @allhailnjadaka @vanitykocaine @amethyst1993 @thickoreo@blackpantherimagines @kxnfuzed  @bidibidibombaclaat

A?N: There are a lot of people who needed to be tagged, and honestly it’s 1am and I got class in the morning soooo, I’ll add yall heathens later. LOVE YOU! A BITCH IS A TIRED, SICK, COLLEGE STUDENT!

[wecanbe-heroes]

Tag Game!

I was tagged by the lovely @connorshero

Last

Drink: Water. 

Phone Call: my mom

Text: “OH FUCK”

Song: We Own The Night by The Wanted

Time You Cried: Hmmm, not sure. I almost started crying the other day.

Ever

Dated someone twice: No

Kissed someone and regretted it: Yes, still do.

Been cheated on: No

Lost someone special: Not really.

Been depressed: heck yeah borther. Since I was around 14 ish? Idk I was a teenager when it started.

Gotten drunk and thrown up: No

Favorite colors: Grey, Blue, and Burgundy

In the last year you have

Made new friends: Yesss!

Fallen out of love: No

Laughed until you cried: So many times

Found out someone was talking about: I never found out, but I’m fairly certain.

Met someone who changed you: Yes

Found out who your friends are: Yes.

Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: Yes

General

How many of your Facebook friends do you know irl: All of them

Do you have any pets: 3 dogs (well 4 right now but one is temporary) and a cat

Do you want to change your name: No.

What did you do for your last birthday: Went to Japanese (my fave <3) for lunch and then Olive Garden for dinner. Got to order my first official drink lmao. (and my crush was working)

What were you doing at midnight last night: Watching BigJigglyPanda and talking to a friend.

What is something you can’t wait for: Moving back to Kentucky

What are you listening to right now: My study playlist, so movie/video game scores. It’s on a song from Destiny right now.

Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Um, yes?

Something that gets on your nerves: Someone talking to/asking me a bunch of questions when I first wake up.

Most visited website: Youtube and Tumblr

Hair color: Brown. I want to color it again but would mess up my Halloween costume (*cough*connor*cough*)

Long or short hair: Short

Do you have a crush on someone: Yes

What do you like about yourself: My humor

Want any piercings: No thanks

Blood type: I have no idea

Nicknames: Jess, Jay, Jaybird, Blue Jay, Guh, Skittles, Salt.

Relationship status: Single

Zodiac: Leo

Pronouns: She/her

Favorite tv shows: Pushing Daisies, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Gilmore Girls, Doctor Who, and Supernatural.

Tattoos: None, but getting one soon.

right or left handed: Left

Ever had surgery: Yes

Piercings or ear piercings: Ears

Sport: I don’t play any, unless you count horseback riding.

Vacation: We travel a lot, so have been to a lot of places. Italy and New York City have been my favorites, as well as Disney World. We got to travel out West and that was really nice.

More general

Eating: Just ate some yogurt

Drinking: Water.

About to watch: Bryan and Amelia’s DBH stream since I have yet to do that.

Waiting for: My mom, nephew, and brother to get back so we can make Big Macs

Want: More time

Get Married: Hopefully one day

Career: Office Manager, personal assistant, and full time college student.

Which is better

Hugs or kisses

Lips or eyes

Shorter or taller

Older or younger

Nice arms or stomach

Hookup or relationship

Troublemaker or hesitant

Have you ever

Kiss a stranger: No.

Drunk hard liquor: Yes.

Lost glasses: No

Turned someone down: Yes.

Sex on first date: Nope

Broken someone’s heart: Yes

Had your heart broken: Not really

Been arrested: No

Cried when someone died: No (unless you count fictional characters lol)

Fallen for a friend: No

Do you believe in

Yourself: Sometimes

Miracles: Yes

Love at first sight: No

Santa Clause: No

Kiss on the first date: Depends on the person, but probably not.

Angels: Yes

Others

Best friend’s name: Hunter

Eye color: Brown

Favorite movie: They’re all amazing oof. Probably Disney’s Robin Hood and Treasure Planet, To All The Boy’s I’ve Loved Before, Letters to Juliet, and Back To The Future.

Favorite actors: I don’t really have favorites per say but I like Tom Holland, Robin Williams, and Dylan O’Brien