#what the FUCK was that act 3 though. heartwrenching?????

[lilyoutloud]

i accidentally pulled an all nighter finishing veilguard last night and WOOOOOH WHAT THE FUCCCCCCK anyways i have been permanently changed by the journey

[butmakeitgayblog]

Any new headcanons brewing in your head after seeing Alycia at the AACTA

Not... entirely

But I've had thoughts. Bear with me.

I'm not even remotely the person to write something like this at all, but it definitely did have me thinking of a SORT OF SHOEH-esque type fic. Something involving them being closeted and in Hollywood. Getting their flowers for their talent and being in love, but having to keep it quiet their entire careers. I've seen some fics along this line here and there, but inevitably in the fic, one or both eventually come out on stage or something.

Which is great! That's a lovely and hopeful ending.

But also....

Not entirely realistic.

Or even half as heartwrenching.

"Well yeah jesus fuck, why do you want sad shit Andi, why are you always such a glutton for punishment and literary pain?"

Well I'll tell you why: cuz... shut up

Idk it just got me thinking of Clexa as two Hollywood starlets on kind of differing ends of the spectrum of Hollywood that in the public eye are generally never really thought about together.

Lexa tends to do more gritty work, a lot more indie films. Dark threaded moody pieces and emotional roles, not generally thought of as box office fodder, but pretty much always a contender at awards season. Sleeper hits, you get me. Things like that. She definitely has a well known name, but she's selective in her work and that gains her a lot of respect with fans, even if they have to sometimes wait 2-3 years between projects. Because whatever she signs on for, it's pretty much always really fucking good. Whereas Clarke is more of a mainstream girly. She does a decently broad spectrum of films, but they're by and large always ones with bigger budgets, bigger release dates, more screens. It's not that they're not quality pictures, it's just that Clarke likes to work a broad range of things. One year she's in a comedy, the next a period piece, the next action. There's no real labeling her career.

And most importantly, they're both very, very straight.

At least, their personas are.

Alexandria is a smoky eyed femme fatale who leaves all the men eating out of the palm of her hand. Very "Look but don't touch" attitude that adds to her allure, to her mystery, despite her always being attached to leading man's arm. Miss Griffin is the picture of buxom Hollywood glam that every guy has on the List. Known for leaving a string of broken hearted men in her wake with little more than a cheek kiss-stained in signature red lipstick

Lexa and Clarke though?

Lexa and Clarke are two friends who have been deeply in love and committed to each other for the better part of 5 years.

They love each other in secret because that's what they feel like they have to do. They have two seperate houses with two separate addresses, and only one bed they actually sleep in.

It only really burns on the big nights, which I think would be an interesting oneshot. Just a glimpse into their life and what it feels like in that moment. The night when all their work and their sacrifices are being honored. Because even though, yes, they do play the part of friends and manage to sit near each other, it's not the same. It's not the same when they can't get ready together or even show up in the same car. When they have to remind themselves not to lean into each other too often, or even reach for the others hand to calm their nerves.

When one wins, they walk up alone without a hug or kiss from the only person who actually matters. They thank their families and their friends and their management that they can barely stand half the time, and remind themselves to smile like it's the happiest moment of their life even though at least half it all feels like a lie. Because yeah, they get lonely in the months when projects and shooting schedules pull them to opposite sides of the globe... but somehow those months never feel quite as lonely as being in a room filled with people who act like they adore you, while the love of your life sits quietly with her own "date" half an aisle away

[eurydicees]

in need of fanfic/book recs from ya <3

ooooooh okay idk what genre of book or fandom/ship fic you want so here are my general recent favorites! i'm not gonna give a summary, just a small note/review with my thoughts, so ur gonna have to google the books and click the ao3 links--my apologies but this post was getting way too long lmfao

real life books!

gideon the ninth / the locked tomb series by tamsyn muir: i'm really working my way through this series and i loooooove it. the characters make me crazy and every turn in the plot has me screaming a little. there's been a lot of deranged texts to irls about this one.

under the whispering door by t.j. klune: this book DID make me cry. it's a really well woven story about love for your family and your friends and death and finding satisfaction and fulfillment in life (and death) and moving forward. HIGHLY recommend his other book (the house on the cerulean sea) as well!! i read that one first and it's a really gorgeous, satsifying read.

the shell collector by anthony doerr: this is a short story collection technically but i loooooove it. each story individually is really beautifully done and i absolutely LOVE his writing style. i think i take a lot of inspiration from him for my own writing!

on earth we're briefly gorgeous by ocean vuong: top books that, like, make yourself feel seen. another author/poet that i feel i can attribute a lot of inspiration for my style and love of words to in general.

sharks in the rivers by ada limón: poetry collection! but one of my all time favorite poetry collections and i can't let this go unnamed. i absolutely ADORE ada limón (you may know her from "the great blue heron of dunbar road" or "instructions on not giving up", which floats around tumblr pretty regularly). i think i first read this collection for class but it genuinely changed something in me. i actually have a tattoo based on these poems <3

post-colonial love poem by natalie diaz: another poetry collection but this one, like, fucked me up. it's woven together as a collection in an absolutely breathtaking way, but each poem also stands alone really beautifully.

fics - haikyuu!!

a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam by swampdragons (iwaoi, 6911 words): i read this a bit ago and really loved it, though it was also really emotionally difficult for me to personally get through--one of those fics that really drives the emotions home so deeply that it hurts to keep going. part of that might just be my own personal connection to the topic. idk. but either way it's ABSOLUTELY worth it.

The Benefits of Patience by Moami (iwaoi, 3363 words): this one's silly and funny and so much more lighthearted than the prev rec lmfao. it's like. healthy but messy but established but not established but a real relationship but an almost relationship to be iwaoi <3333

The Way He Looks At You by roobtheboob (iwaoi, 3805 words): i think i read too much iwaoi. but this one's really cute i PROMISE. i like the kyoutani POV idea a lot and i think the way kyoutani is written overall is really well done, particularly in the team dynamic and his respect for iwaizumi.

The years shall run like rabbits by ladyoflalaland (ushiten, 7292 words): obsessed w this fic. ushijima's mother is written out to be a REALLY interesting character and her strained relationship with ushijima is fascinating. the passage of time of it all......man.

fics - other fandoms

"Normal" by OnigiriCat4Ever (fruits basket, kyohru, 7140 words): this one's a really cute post-canon character study of sorts and i really love it. i love how the 7yo hajime is written and his relationship with kyo is really sweet.

The act of loving in return by kindokja (bllk, ryusae, 2809 words): this one's both funny and heartwrenching and sweet and painful all at once. beautiful, necessary mix in a fic. i like it a lot.

turn your face (towards the sun) by youareoldfatherwilliam (atla, gen, 5813 words): im normal about fics abt the chit sang and the 41st, in case u were curious!

that's all i got for now? i literally just went through my most recent bookmarks and cherry picked some special highlights lol. feel free to let me know if you want anything more specific!!!!! u already know i loooooove giving recommendations<3

[floofz]

i just finished watching ep five... can i know your thoughts on it

OUGH... so many thoughts my dude... where do i even start...

well first of all this episode completely wrecked me emotionally. domestic violence is always hard to watch, but damn did they do their best to make it as horrible as possible (in a good way! its amazing how studio lan sheds light on these kinds of things happening). the animation - the expressions, the hitting, the bruises - the audio design - god the sounds of the violence alone were so fucking heartwrenching. and then the involvement of the kids too. it was so so painful to watch but it was so incredibly well done.

we finally get to know more about the two siblings (and also confirmation that the two are actually involved! plus that lu guang turns out not to be the good brother in the childrens drawing). the scene with cheng xiaoshi being amused about the brother's behaviour and childish thinking seems funny at first, but when you later see the family situation theyre in, it all just makes so much painful sense. he has all this rage and strong sense of justice in him bc they are growing up in this unstable household full of violence. its heartbreaking.

the boy the brother met at the fountain, i first thought it was a young cheng xiaoshi bc of the haircut, but his voice was very different so now im perplexed. they could just be trying to throw us off here but i cant imagine them picking such a drastically different voice from cheng xiaoshi for him, especially bc we already heard his voice as a kid in s1. now my guess is maybe a young qian jin? it would check out with what we know about younger him. and i mean were 5 episodes in we kinda need to get to all the connections eventually.

now, lu guang and cheng xiaoshi. i've already seen people on reddit talk about how lu guang seems off again this episode. what particularly makes me think though is that one scene where their connection supposedly went "bad". i mean, everything, especially in animation, is very intentional so there must be much more to it. im wondering if someone interfered with their connection. one theory i also saw and thought about it a bit more on my own: what if red eyes - either one of the siblings - somehow possessed lu guang during their dive for a short time, making him unable to talk to cheng xiaoshi on his own, hence the silence. and after that he also doesnt realize he was silent for a while. and bc one of the siblings took hold over him for a sec, they saw what lu guang saw and that would explain why the sister supposedly knows cheng xiaoshi (and wants to talk to him at the police station) and that he was involved with her past through the dive. though i guess she could also know about him from qian jin. idk, I JUST HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS.

all in all a fucking fantastic episode but i did have to take a break after watching it. its very emotionally draining. but you can definitely tell the care and thought they put into this.

OH WAIT I ALMOST FORGOT. the little soft expressions and smiles from lu guang when cheng xiaoshi acted cute as xixi in the episode made me explode<3 gdi once again cheng xiaoshi never sees his soft expressions, LU GUANG LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT WHEN HE CAN SEE.

anyway yeah lots of thoughts 😭 PLS also let me know what you think!!!

[snellyfish]

!!! what are your drdt ch2 ep7 thoughts 👀👀👀???????

... :(

does my suffering bemuse you, anon?

DRDT ch2 ep7 spoilers.......

MAKES ME SO FREAKING MAAAAAADDDDD it is absolutely fucking devastating and heartwrenching which is like,,, good? because that's the point, but, MAN,, I so badly wanted to see how Arei's dynamic with everyone changed (if externally at all) after her breakdown and David's kind words for her. But with all of that in consideration as well as the way she was acting before her body was found, I wouldn't be surprised if she committed suicide, honestly ...... :')) life could be nightmare

Not 100% set on that yet but, yeahh, until we see if there is any evidence around, such as a struggle (which i immediately looked for LOL), I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case. WHICH IS SO UNFORTUNATE AAUGHHGG I LOVED HER SO MUCH IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!! Also honestly the whole time looking at her corpse I was rapidly flashing between "damn is this cgi or something this is super pretty looking" vs "im gonna jump out a freaking window" simultaneously

....................................UM UMM TRYING TO REMEMBER WHAT ELSE HAPPENED

I fucking love Veronika and for her ENTIRE scene I was just like :D :D :D and every time Teruko spoke i was like D: D: D: I cannot stand her ass still, sorry. anyway VERONIKA 4LYFERS I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE CAN DO NO WRONG!!!! Was kinda confused on her whole "plan" thing and how long she droned on about it when it was like,,, very obviously not,,,,,, plausible,, So i wonder what's up with that. hmmhmmhm.

Was also pretty distracted this episode due to random DND brainrot lol so I might rewatch or skim through later, sure I'm forgetting a lot right now 🙏🙏

A little disappointed with how Little focus there was on Ace (shoutout to his neck bandages) or Nico, but I also kind of like that because its like.....well?? now someone literally just died so no one has ANY time to attempt to think about their problems LMAO. Annoying this Ace/Levi/Nico debacle will continue into chapter 3, though, assuming one of them isn't the blackened in this case. Looking at you, Ace. Love you babe but you are UNWELL and OFF YOUR ROCKER. Actually, all three of you are unwell.

But yeah, pre-investigation, my immediate suspects are Arei, Ace, Nico, and maybe Levi.

[riddlerosehearts]

...well. i finished my first playthrough of baldur's gate 3. over the last several days i did the fight against gortash, the final battle against the netherbrain, the ending scenes at the docks, and the epilogue party. in this post i'll just write about everything up until the ending cutscenes start, and then make another post tomorrow because i have many thoughts and i don't want to make this be insanely long. not that it matters since i've basically just been making these posts for myself the entire time, but ANYWAY

love the fact that i was able to cast otto's irresistible dance on gortash during the very first turn and keep him boogeying for a bit before he managed to break out of it. using it on someone like him is just hilarious. this battle was surprisingly really easy, though? like with both otto's irresistible dance and hold person available, gortash barely got to do anything and there were only a couple other enemies who were incredibly easy to defeat. the grenade launchers were more annoying than anything else. kind of underwhelming but considering how difficult some of the other act 3 fights have been, and how close i now am to the end, i'm not complaining!

i'm so sad about karlach oh my god. she hasn't even been a favorite of mine, i mean, i like her a lot, she's always a delight to talk to, but she's not the type of character i get as easily attached to and i haven't used her on my team that much overall. and yet her voice acting was so full of emotion and her dialogue so heartwrenching that she made me wanna cry. gortash is dead and it should feel like this big victory but for her it isn't, because it doesn't change anything about what's happened or what's going to happen to her... elenion tried to joke around and call gortash ugly and karlach said she was too tired to laugh. they told her they think she should keep living as long as she can and she said "you do it, i'm tired". she's tried so hard to seem positive and hide her loneliness but now she's so caught up in her grief and anger that she's just tired of it all. "i want to live" plays in the background of the scene. she ends things by saying "love you" even if you're not romancing her. god i want to hug her so bad :( going to use the hugs mod i have installed to do that after talking to her back at camp.

talking to everyone around the camp, lae'zel is so encouraging in her own way and even astarion says there's no justice in the world because of what's happening to karlach... for some reason, it was this bit of dialogue with jaheira that made me actually tear up a little:

like i guess it's just the fact that jaheira is this legendary hero that karlach looks up to and was so excited to meet, and here she is saying she doesn't know what else she can do to help karlach. it's so unfair what the fuck!!

had to screenshot this dialogue from wyll in the astral plane because i love him:

the emperor is an interesting character, and i can honestly understand why some people, and some tavs, might trust him and want to ally with him. but elenion is very untrusting by nature, and sure, he's grown a lot and learned to put more trust in his allies--but the emperor as the dream guardian just constantly made him feel confused and uncertain and then once he was finally willing to fully trust them, he found out that he was being lied to after all. and then the emperor kept withholding information from him, and trying to convince him that he should become an illithid. so no, he is not allying with the emperor!! although orpheus's attitude is not exactly winning me over lmao, for one thing we did not STEAL the githyanki egg!!

WOAH the baby owlbear grew up?! big armored owlbear?! was not expecting that! also, huh, zevlor is here too... i don't think the gather your allies quest ever mentions him in the quest journal so i didn't realize he'd show back up. maybe it's just me, but i kind of wish there was more resolution to his story. i looked up whether he ever reappears after you rescue him in act 2 and found that he doesn't, and he doesn't even have a voiced line of dialogue at high hall, which really sticks out and seems weird because everyone else does except for him and volo?? the gondians also aren't here even though the quest journal does mention them... i think i got pretty much every not-evil ally, though! except for mol, i guess.

i callled pretty much every ally during the big battles in the courtyard because i wanted to see what they could do! and then i only called a few during the actual final battle because i was afraid that certain characters like zevlor or the owlbear might permadie. but it's so cool being able to call on everyone who you've helped throughout the game, as it really helps these last battles feel more epic and exciting. though it also makes me wonder what the rest of my party who isn't here in high hall is doing... like, okay, so jaheira and halsin were not in my party and they still showed up to give their aid. but what about minsc and boo? what about shadowheart, astarion, and karlach?? are they all just chilling out at camp while the rest of us fight?? it just feels odd that they don't show up here at all.

i accidentally got party wiped while trying to reach the netherbrain because i couldn't figure out where i was actually supposed to be going and messed up... please, if i ever have to be part of a band of heroes rising up to stop a world-ending threat, do not make me the leader. my nonexistent sense of direction will literally doom us all. the second attempt was really easy once i figured out what i was doing LMAO but i did also have to restart the final battle because... i had no idea how the thing with the netherbrain destroying the platforms worked and my party all died at once the first time. it's my first playthrough and i knew nothing about this whole part of the game, so of course there was going to be some trial and error. i had a lot of fun with all of that, though!!

and now we get to the ending cutscenes... which i will be posting about separately later. for now i'll just say i love this game and i can't believe i've hit the end of it. i started playing in march what the fuck.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

im never leaving the blanket fort mickey i fear u will have to call pest control 😔😔

FIRST OF ALLLLL the song !!!!!!! listening to it rn hehe AND I CAN TOTALLY PICTURE IT WITH THE PAINTING SCENE WAHHHHH something about the instrumental…. it’s sooo soft and just . Enchanting? Bewitching? i can imagine gojo just gazing at sugu all mesmerized…. he’s almost hypnotized. have i mentioned that journalist!gojo is the realest ever i kin him

OH AND AND the lyrics !!

you’re the piece of gold // the flushes all my soul…..

it’s just sooooooo tender :((( so pretty and soft and intimate. mickey ur song choices always get me so invested in the scene i can practically taste it

but wahhhh we need to talk abt this!!.. suguru teaching satoru how to paint 🥺🥺🥺 mickey… mickeyyyy.,…. there r tears in my eyes they are T_T the sweetest. i can picture it soooo vividly like the moonlight the sound of the brush against the canvas…. suguru being so attentive and so eager to teach. i think he finds so much satisfaction in taking that role yk?? esp since vamp!reader is the teacher when it comes to their own dynamic…. journalist!gojo is the realest as always i would also pop a boner just from looking at sugu LMAOOO he’s just so ethereal!!!! so beautiful!!!!!

but mickey what if sugu noticed 😭😭😭 i can imagine him giving gojo the MEANEST side eye he’s like i am trying to teach u abt the wonders of colour theory….. what is wrong w u …. (he thinks it’s a little cute. just a tiny tiny bit!!!!) they’re so fucking funny im wildly obsessed

AND MICKEY….. WE’RE SO FUCKING CONNECTED what if i told u that during my frequent mickey!vamps daydreams i kept picturing them w a beautiful long-haired siamese cat……  maybe this is less of a ari/mickey hivemind moment and more of a cat people hivemind moment though. vampires NEED to own a cat it’s the law!! and more importantly stsg need to own a cat no matter the universe <33

anyway anyway SUGU BEING THE CAT’S FAVORITE SOOOOO TRUE YOU’RE THE REALEST he has this Allure that no cat can ignore. it’s simply how he is. VAMP!READER BEING JEALOUS TOOOO THEY’RE THE CUTEST :((( HELP them trying so hard to act nonchalant…. sneakily trying to lure it in with treats….. and then pretending not to care when they get rejected 🥺🥺 sugu even encourages the kitty because he loves them and he thinks they are being soooo cute but the cat is just :< no thoughts head empty only sugu!!!

AND SATOSHOKO WAHHHHH no bc i can picture them getting along SO well even though no one expected it 😭😭 it’s that shared thirst for knowledge yk????? both of them love digging into other people’s brains except in shoko’s case it’s more. Literal. I LOVE THEM MICKEY ur dynamics make me so overjoyed they alwaysss feel so warm and thoughtful and they resonate w me soooo deeply i feel so thankful to have u here!!! i can just crawl into ur askbox and get a bunch of cute silly heartwrenching thoughts for free >:3 love u love u i am rubbing my head against yours like a cat

AND AND AND PLAYING BOARD GAMESSSSS ohhh they’d have so much fun …. sugu always plays by the rules and toru always tries to bend them LMAO i feel like vamp!reader just enjoys the chaos <33 SHOKO ALWAYS WINS SO TRUEE ok but mickey … would they joke about shoko being a witch. idk why that came into my mind or if witches exist in this universe i can just imagine shoko rolling dice and getting double sixes every time until satoru is just like . are u a witch 🤨🤨 did u cast a spell on the dice 🤨🤨🤨 no u idiot lady luck just loves her. I LOVE THEMMM the only fambly ever…

also heheheh armin came to sit with me just as i started writing this!!! he has received his kiss!! he meowed back!! he loves you!! i know bc i know his language so just trust me!!

🥺🥺🥺🥺 mickey what if i told u i cried. i dont have any cats of my own at the moment sniffle bUT my brother has two n they love me >:33 here is one of them!!! as a treat!!!!!! he told me to send u his regards!!!! he’s like a little puppy he loves sleeping and snoozing and cuddling . i would kill for him his name is haku bc my brother is a weeb <33

MICKEY i am jumping out of the blanket fort excitedly <333 this is so long overdue bc ive been too excited to sit down and think abt the Vamps properly BUT it’s finally time.. this is just going of ur most recent rb abt them btw which was . a While ago IVE BEEN THINKING OF IT CONSTANTLY THOUGH BUT ;;;;; STSG…. THE STSG DYNAMIC….

mickey i’m convinced that u are secretly plotting my downfall there’s no other explanation. VAMP!SUGU FLIRTING W JOURNALIST!GOJO ……..…. i DIED i exploded they make me feel so ill. I’VE PROBABLY DEFINITELY SAID THIS BUT EVERY TIME U GIVE ME ANOTHER PIECE OF VAMP LORE I FALL FURTHER INTO THE PIT just . sugu feeling more comfortable in the dynamic & getting more confident… JOURNALIST!GOJO BEING FLUSTEREDPEKSJ HELP MEEEEEE vamp!reader would find that so funny wouldn’t they. so sweet. now i’m just imagining the vamps teaming up to fluster gojo 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 me next

(he doesn't want u to be jealous he's more asking for reassurance - is it okay if the two of them mess around together too? and of course it is bc you want your boys to be happy)

dont even get me started on this ^^^^ im sending u my hospital bill watch out . MICKEY :(( im so obsessed w vamp!reader it isn’t even funny i need them so bad it’s sickening. they KNOW they call the shots and sugu knows it too and the way they’re kind of just. indulging their beloveds…… they’re sooo <33333 yeah.

i just wanted to let u know i am in fact thinking abt these three constantly i am kissing ur brain always. pls give mr armin a lil kiss from me too !! <33

HI ARI BABY!!!

it's so good to see you here (i might keep you forever)(/hj).

what do you think of playground love by air (btw doesn't the cover for this song look like sugu lmao i just noticed that) for this stsg? it might not be something you immediately thought of, right? but i feel like it suits the sugu teaching satoru how to paint?? do you see the vision?? or did you imagine something else?? i need to know. i think this moment would be such an important one in their relationship such a pivotal moment

i can totally see suguru talking about the colors and anatomy and how to hold the brush and then little journalist!gojo is just staring at him with stars in his eyes trying to concentrate because he really does want to learn but fuck it's so hard with this angel before him...

and i think the song name is also funny in a sense that satoru is like a teenager bc how easily he pops his boners lmao okay he just gets so fucking excited in his head it's literally not even sexual????? like sugu is just sooooo handsome under the moonlight it's making his head spin and oh! oops!

another thing i thought about is the fact that they definitely have a cat!!! idk if i said this already somewhere but they do!!! not a black one bc that's a little basic but maybe like a siamese one? meow very cute. anyway i think satoru desperately want to have the cat's attention but it loves sugu the most lmao and he's soooooo smug about that too!!! satoru is all pspspspsps bribing the kitty with the treats but it literally ignores him?????? and just gets comfy on sugu's lap without a second thought. imagine the pouty little satoru here:((( btw the reader is also jealous of sugu in this case but they refuse to show it. bc c'mon they're the leader of the house they can't be upset over their own cat liking their beloved more. no way. never. that's so childish. :(.

oh and and and!! the vamp!reader really does like satoru and they know that he's the perfect guy to help bring suguru out of his shell even more yk they know that a little curious puppy like him is only gonna do good in their household (after they reassure sugu ofc)

wait actually i can't remember whether i said that satoru just kind of moved in too right??? like he rarely goes to his city apartment and he just has his own room (as if he fucking sleeps there smh) and he absolutely loves lliving in the mansion he doesn't even hide it. i do need to say that he also adores having maids and a butler but he's still incredibly respectful towards them yk like he isn't pointlessly bossing them around

he also loves to blast stupid fucking music over the whole house.... canon i'm afraid. idk why but justin timberlake just popped into my head lmao like his music in the 10's wheww bangers though i won't lie

OHHH WAITT I JUST THOUGHT ABOUT SHOKO AND SATORU bc like they don't know each other yet!!!!! so imagine shoko comes over for their usual wine night and then finds this blue eyed guy lazing on the couch without a shirt on????? like who are you???? but then she recognizes him hehehe i think journalist!gojo is a rather known one he's good at his job so she just rolls her eyes but after an hour or two i think they actually get along surprisingly well!! (okay i mean it's not a surprise for us but for the reader and sugu) they kind of share the same stupid af humor and it all just gets super fucking funny when they're all playing board games together lmao (shoko always wins btw)(always.)

also heheheh armin came to sit with me just as i started writing this!!! he has received his kiss!! he meowed back!! he loves you!! i know bc i know his language so just trust me!!

ANYWAYY THIS IS THEMM!! i love talking about them it comes so easily the words really write themselves really (i can't wait to actually you know.. write something real for them lmao)(SOON I PROMISE SOON)

thank you for coming by i hope you never leave!!! mwah mwah mwah!! love you lots and lots and lots!!

[love-strawberry]

met you at the right time

summary : in which they break up but find their way back to each other.

pairing : harry styles x reader

warnings : language

author's note : hiiiiii!! omg i missed on writing here, im so sorry for going mia but im back!! requests are open and so is my inbox, go crazy. i love you all, thank you for sticking around. also, this fic is inspired by feels like by gracie abrams

tagged : @slut4benbarnes @ellora-brekker @0oolookitsme @ateliefloresdaprimavera

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y/n_ 'in the morning i'll be better' out now!! for the past 11 months, i've put my EVERYTHING in this album and to see it releasing is a dream come true. hope you all like this album <3 thank you so much for supporting me, i love you all endlessly!!

105,829 comments

username this hurt

username "i play pretend, try to act like i'm fine, look the other way, so you don't see me cry, i'm fine, look, it's alright" ouch-

username "cause even when im drunk you're the one i'd call, 2:30 in the morning and you seemed like home" hurts my soul

arianagrande AHHHHHH

username "cause what if i don't wanna lose you, what if missed it and now it's over"

username her and harry </3

username she went from "writing our names on the walls, said forever and that stayed true" to "now im scratching our initials trying to make sense of what happened"

selenagomez !!!!!

username "cause now you got some inside jokes with the others and im still replaying your laugh in my mind, i do mind, yeah im not fine"

username my head hurts thinking about her and harry

username i wanna scream and ugly cry now i miss harry and y/n so fucking much like why did they have to break up

louist91 so beautiful love!!! loved it so much <3

niallhoran 🦋🦋🦋

username I KNOW WE NEVER LABELLED IT BUT I'D LIKE TO THINK YOU WERE IT FOR ME, MY FOREVER, MY HEART AND SOUL, MY LOVER FORLORN

conangray brb gonna go and scream into my pillow, bang my head into the wall and ugly cry </3

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liked by billieeilish, jefezoff, mitchrowland and 4,529,951 others

harrystyles 'same group of friends' out now. i hope you all love it as much i did. thank you so much for you support, i love you x

175,528 comments

username ouch

username "cause we got the same group of friends, they keep quiet and try not to strike a nerve when it comes to you and i"

username 😭

jefezoff loving this so much

username im thoroughly convinced that harry and y/n are out to kill us with sadness with these songs

username "can't we just be friends like we were before, or did we just start it for it to come back and ruin us all, guess it's the problem in dating someone you already know"

username my (yourshipname) </3

username please please please PLEASE get back together, my mental health is at sake

louist91 heartwrenching song mate!! loved it

username the chorus>>

username i listened to this song and my soul ascended to heaven

niallhoran amazing beautiful brilliant awesome

username 😭😭

username it's okay, didn't need my heart anyway

mitchrowland in awe of you

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liked by harolddddstylez, y/nheartsharry, (yourshipname)_ and 268,725 others

celebri.tea harry styles and y/n y/l/n broke hearts of millions after announcing their breakup 5 months ago. their publicity team claimed that "it wasn't the right time", "right person, wrong time" and "they weren't seeing a lot of eachother". though, styles and y/l/n have sparked rumours after being spotted together in london, sharing a kiss after styles' show. sources close to them said that "they both sat down and tried to make it work. and it is working, clearly." to read the full article, click here.

68,827 comments

username YESSS

username if they're back together, im gonna cry

username okay so we go heartbreak album from y/n and a heartbreaking song from harry AND they're apparently back together?? harry and y/n won fr

username screaming crying throwing up sliding down the wall banging my head

username brb gonna scream

username JEHXJANXHNSKSMSHXMKAKAJS

username THE IT COUPLE YESS

username so glad that they tried to make things work out

username im sorry for the person i'll become when they announce their relationship

username i bet they're gonna look back at their heartbreak songs and laugh lmfao

username yes yes yes yes yes yes yES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

username thank fuck

username really hoping this is true

username 😭😭

username everyone, we might be getting them back

username i felt like a child of divorce

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liked by harrystyles, tchalamet, oliviarodrigo and 4,325,824 others

y/n_ met you at the right time

tagged harrystyles

196,528 comments

username no amount of preparation could've prepared for the 2nd pic

username HSISJXNSKXHDHSJKXKSKDJDNDJCKS

username yeah, my cat needs to hear this

niallhoran thank god 🤍🦋

username 😭😭

username my parents

username y'all still paying for the damage you caused with your music

arianagrande love love love loveeeeeeee you both

zendaya FUCKING FINALLY YES

zayn thank you, khai didn't wanna spend christmas with auntie y/n and new year's day with uncle harry

username their friends being relieved is a mood

harrystyles i'm gonna spend every lifetime making it the right time for us <3 i love you

-> y/n_ i love you more than i'll EVER be able to convey

username WHEN?? IS?? IT?? MY?? TURN??

username 🤍👄🤍

username 🦋🦋🦋

selenagomez so happy for you 🤍🦋

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liked by y/n_, tchalamet, mitchrowland and 4,629,925 others

harrystyles this is what it feels like

tagged y/n_

189,628 comments

username HSJDIXJSMXLSMJZ

username THEM>>>

username they're so beautiful

username bi panic

mitchrowland yesssss

tchalamet good, maybe now she'll stop calling me at night to cry about how she missed you

-> y/n_ you're on thin fucking ice timothee

username full on sobbing

username FUCK YESSSS YESSSS

username ❣️❣️❣️

username they invented being in love

y/n_ it feels Iike heaven

-> harrystyles loving you does feel like heaven

username imagine someone loving you the way harry loves y/n, oh right, you CAN'T

username forever gonna be in awe of you

billieeilish my fav couple 🤍

username they're soulmates

username yes officer, these two right here

username !!!!

niallhoran 💟

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[sinsbymanka]

Hello!! It is @rare-egg-hunt month which means we are officially celebrating all our Solas rare pairs!

If you're following this blog you may be somewhat aware I've been "painting" my eggs all through March. Starting next Monday I'm going to be pushing out a multichaptered story built around 12 of the prompts from the Rare Egg Hunt. It's called Cheating the Dread Wolf and will focus on the post-Trespasser love story of Maria Cadash, Solas, and Varric Tethras.

Maria Cadash hung up the Inquisitor's mantle for the Viscountess' crown, but she's unable to stop her desperate and impossible struggle to stop Fen'Harel from destroying the world both her husband and daughter inhabit. The fact Varric, Maria, and Solas are all madly in love with each other just means she may have enough of an edge to win this game.

In other words, everyone is poly and happy but first there's some shit they've gotta go through. I promise there will be angst, fluff, smut, dad Varric, dad Solas, and mama Cadash. Plus an absolutely ADORABLE baby as a treat.

I also have a playlist to go with it! Here's a list of all my songs and why I've picked them as a sneak peek!

Things That Stop You Dreaming by Passenger

If you can't be what you want You learn to be the things you're not If you can't get what you need You learn to need the things that stop you dreaming Oh the things that stop you dreaming

The PINING at the beginning of this story is outrageous. It is honestly a sequel to two fics, the first of which was written by the lovely @blarfkey who inspired, enable, and beta'd this entire project. (seriously. It would never have happened without her and I owe her so much for the idea and the love she's poured into it alongside me).

The two fics can be found in the series Three Liars Mend Broken Hearts on AO3. It shows the way Solas and Maria can't seem to stay away from each other and the ill advised sexy times that happens as a result (yes these are both smut with plot and feelings). So by the time we start Cheating the Dread Wolf they've already acted on their feelings even though they shouldn't and they're all a bit of a mess.

Rest of the playlist below!

Never Really Over by Katy Perry 

Two years, and just like that, my head still takes me back Thought it was done, but I guess it's never really over Oh, we were such a mess, but wasn't it the best? Thought it was done, but I guess it's never really over

I revisit the theme of not being able to let go and move on a lot in this story - in both good and bad ways. Varric, in particular, is completely unwilling to give up on Solas no matter what. Solas is unable to let go of his past. Maria can’t let go of her distrust. It’s all a mess.

Power Over Me by Dermot Kennedy

So we hide away and never tell You decide, if darkness knows you well That lesson of love, all that it was I need you to see You got that power over me

This is such a good smut song. I will live and die on this hill. It’s on my smut playlist too. ANYWAY. This is a good song for Maria and Solas. Also. Smut. 

That Man by Caro Emerald

Ooh that man is like a flame And ooh that man plays me like a game My only sin is I can't win Ooh I wanna love that man

This is a recommendation from @blarfkey and is the quintessential Varric romance song. I picked this one for a very specific chapter where Varric in effect tricks Solas into a tea party with him and Varric and Maria’s daughter. 

Hold My Girl by George Ezra

I've got time, I've got love Got confidence you'll rise above Give me a minute to hold my girl Give me a minute to hold my girl

This is actually for a chapter that mostly focuses on parenthood and how it brings our trio together. It’s very angsty and heartwrenching and I love it so much. 

You are the Reason by Calum Scott

I don't wanna hide no more I don't wanna cry no more Come back I need you to hold me (You are the reason) Be a little closer now Just a little closer now Come a little closer I need you to hold me tonight

This is THE OT3 song and the unofficial theme song of this fucking fic. I have listened to it on repeat more than anything else on this playlist. 

Me and the Devil by the Fratellis

Tell one last beautiful lie for me Make all your promises rhyme for me Keep me in line but do it honestly Make it real, make it slow, stay alive for me Come on, babe where the line goes dead I'll be fire, I'll be rain, I'll be joy, I'll be dread Come on, baby don't be shy All I want is you and I Out on the street I'll be every face There'll be no man alive That can take my place

This song just gives me Solas related chills. I cannot with it. These two verses in particular scream Varric, Solas, and Maria. This is also on the playlist at approximately the part of the story where shit starts going down. Also another @blarfkey recommendation. 

Move by Saint Motel

This girl, this beautiful girl, with eyes the size of the o-o-ocean. This man, this dutiful man, he's got these mixed up emo-o-o-tions. I want it, can't have it. Oh I can hardly stand it. Oh what's a man to do... Gotta get up, I gotta get up. Move!

A recent addition to this playlist thanks to @paisleybees who sent this to me as I was writing a chapter that fit it PERFECTLY. I actually picture it as a Varric/Solas song for this work. 

Monster by Paramore

I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world From turning into a monster and eating us alive Don't you ever wonder how we survive? Well now that you’re gone, the world is ours

Another “shit is getting real” song and another @blarfkey recommendation. This is a McFighterson Cadash song for sure. It’s also what I picture for the sole action sequence in this fic. 

Poison and Wine by The Civil Wars

You only know what I want you to I know everything you don't want me to Oh your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine You think your dreams are the same as mine Oh I don't love you but I always will

Enemies and Lovers. Enemies and lovers. Need I say more?! This is SUCH a good song for that trope!

Silence by Marshmello (featuring Khalid) 

I found peace in your violence Can't tell me there's no point in trying I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long I found peace in your violence Can't tell me there's no point in trying I'm at one, and I've been silent for too long

Circling back around to themes of letting go and holding on. This kind of starts the happy ending bit of this work (YES I SWEAR THERE’S A HAPPY ENDING). 

This Year’s Love by David Gray

This year's love had better last 'Cause who's to worry if our hearts get torn When that hurt gets thrown Don't ya know this life goes on? Won't ya kiss me on that midnight street? Sweep me off my feet Singing, "ain't this life so sweet?"

HAPPY ENDING. A bittersweet but ultimately hopeful one <3 

Glitter and Gold by Barns Courtney

Do you walk in the valley of kings? Do you walk in the shadow of men Who sold their lives to a dream? Do you ponder the manner of things In the dark? The dark, the dark, the dark I am flesh and I am bone Arise, ting ting, like glitter and gold I've got fire in my soul Rise up, ting ting, like glitter

This is for the epilogue. It’s called the Dread Wolf Cub Rises and I refuse to give any other details. 

BONUS

Problem by Natalia Kills 

I'm your dream girl This is real love But you know what they say about me... That girl is a problem Girl is a problem Girl is a problem problem

Bea Cadash shows up a lot in this fic with her background sweet angel boyfriend Cole. There’s been a couple times where I need to write Bea and this is just the perfect song to capture her goddamn attitude. 

Anyway! Happy egg hunting!

[kalinara]

It does occur to me that episode 5 of the Witcher is possibly my favorite in terms of interpersonal dynamics.  Specifically for Yennefer and Geralt.

It’s always tricky when we’re dealing with a limited series, with one episode per short story (and not even the full episode, really), to establish strong relationships of the sort that tie the narrative together.  This is especially the case for Yen and Geralt, since its their relationship and its push and pull that’s so very important in the novels and the games.  (Even if you go the other romantic path, it’s still incredibly significant.)

But overall, I think that episode 5 (and episode 6 after that) do a surprisingly good job with the set up.

A lot of the relationship dynamic between Yennefer and Geralt is set up with what came before.  I joked about how the juxtaposition of Geralt’s interest at Calanthe’s torture threat and Yen’s “I *inflict* pain” are the show’s unsubtle way of showing how compatible they are.  But honestly, it’s kind of true.  If you look at the relationships set up at the very beginning: Geralt and Renfri, Yennefer and Istredd, we start to see how the two can fit together.  Yennefer doesn’t play at being anything other than she is.  Geralt (with one exception) doesn’t judge her ambition or lust for power.

I think for people looking for a conventional romance, episode five might seem more than a little lacking.  But Yennefer and Geralt aren’t really a conventional romance.  They’re a kinky romance.  Their initial give and take is more about the exchange of power than it is sweet words and candlelight.

The moment they meet, in the middle of the orgy, the power dynamics are already visibly in play.  He’s out of armor, disarmed, asking for help and bringing apple juice of all things.  She’s gowned and masked, domme chic, lounging in what might as well be a throne.  She’s standing above him as they meet and slowly descends as they speak.  She sets the terms, he accepts.

Then there’s the bath.  He’s naked, in plain sight, while she stalks around him appreciatively.  She lowers herself into the bath, but only after making him turn his back.  She shifts the mirror so he can’t see.  He doesn’t seem to mind that at all.

It gets really interesting though when he mocks her transformation: what was her flaw?  A clubbed foot?  Split ends?  That’s the moment that Yennefer freezes up.  And I don’t think it’s because she was offended.  I think it has to do with the way Yennefer sees her transformation.  Because Yennefer’s transformation was never really about fixing her physical flaws.  If you recall the beginning of episode 3, Yennefer’s big complaint was that she had no idea what her idealized self would look like.  She tells Istredd that he’s lucky: Ban Ard boys don’t have to go through the transformation at all.  She’s not ashamed of her disfigurements, nor should she be.  They may have made her a target for village bullies, but in Aretuza, they’ve never held her back.

Istredd accuses her of being angry that she missed her chance to be beautiful, but there’s no real indication that Yennefer was even thinking about that when she missed the ceremony.  She was still focused on the damage her ancestry reveal had done to her ambition.  She does choose to undergo the transformation, but as a weapon and a means for the power she wants.  It’s a mask, the same as she was wearing in the orgy.

What Geralt did in that moment was say “I see that you’re wearing a mask, and I don’t really care what you’re hiding.”  And that is where things shift. 

She immediately drops the idea of him prostituting himself for his friend’s life (something that he finds obviously disappointing.  Clearly he was enjoying the power exchange too) and goes for a more overt means of getting him out of the way.  But the sexual chemistry is still there and unspoken, and she can’t completely drop the domme act: see, for example, the way she dresses him.

So then we get mind control and an almost execution.  I don’t necessarily think Yen was trying to kill him there.  She probably assumed he’d escape before execution (I doubt she had any idea that the one guard really wanted to “play” with a Witcher.  And how fitting is it that we get those sexualized taunts in an episode that’s all kinky power exchange.).  Or that Jaskier would wish them both away.  Though Yen is also pretty focused on her own desires, so I’m not sure that she that she’d have felt that badly if he had died there.

But then he comes to save her.  And that’s where things get really interesting.  He offers her his wish, she can have whatever she actually wants if she just takes it.  But she refuses.  Her desire for a fertility cure has never really been about having a child.  It’s about being denied something she wants.  It doesn’t mean anything if someone else gives it to her.  And I think she especially doesn’t want HIM to be the one to give it to her.  Yennefer will always be dominant, damnit.

Then Geralt makes his wish.  We don’t know what his exact wording was, but I think we know Geralt well enough to know that whatever wish he made wouldn’t have involved Yennefer falling in love with him.  He’s as emphatic about choice as she is, in his own way.

But at that point their relationship has shifted again.  Yennefer realizes, at least subconsciously, that this is a man who has seen her at her most power hungry.  He saw her in the center of maelstrom screaming that she wanted everything.  Istredd may have loved her before she was beautiful, but he found her lust for power revolting.  Tissaia ridicules it.  But Geralt, who saw her at her worst, experienced her at her worst, doesn’t mind it.

In fact, he trusts her enough to fall asleep in her presence.  That’s got to be intoxicating for someone like Yen.

Geralt’s side of things is also interesting.  (And requires a bit of future knowledge to analyze.)  I think there are a few elements at work here: first, his desire to save self-destructive women is clearly what gets him back into that building after she puts him under mind control.  But I don’t think that’s the point where he truly became enthralled.

I think it was seeing Yennefer at her worst actually: it was seeing her power-lust and her ambition.  It was seeing how much she WANTS.

Because that’s the thing that stands out about season 1 Geralt: except maybe at the very beginning, he doesn’t seem to WANT much of anything.

Of course, he demands coin for service.  But he shies away from any kind of more substantial reward.  Especially if it feels like it’s undeserved.  The whole reason he got a Child Surprise is because he didn’t want a reward at all.  Duny had persisted and Geralt just said “fuck it, give me the next goat you have.”  Geralt’s a dumbass who doesn’t appreciate destiny’s sense of humor.  But he still tries like hell to refuse that gift.

He doesn’t seem to have much by way of long term physical possessions, besides that amulet.  He has Roach...possibly, assuming Roach isn’t a sequence of horses under the same name.  But with the way he talks to her, it’s clear that Roach (Roaches?) is a being to him, not a possession.

Geralt doesn’t seem to care about personal comfort.  He rejects gifts.  And the only thing we ever see him buy for himself is a night’s companionship with a sex worker.

And I think that’s not meant to be a positive thing.  It’s like Geralt says in episode 6, when Yennefer asks him if he ever wanted anything else besides being a Witcher.  And he says that if he had, it was too long ago to remember.

That’s heartwrenching in its own right.  Kaer Morhen did such a number on him that he literally can’t imagine anything other than being a Witcher.

But it’s also even more heartwrenching after episode 8, when we do get to see a Geralt who IS young enough to want something.  And we see at least some of what happened to him to change that.

And it’s sad-funny too, because early on Yennefer doesn’t believe that he went looking for a djinn just to get a good night’s sleep.  But I think we’ve seen enough of Geralt to believe just that.  That’s how broken he is, the closest thing he has to a “want” is sleep.

And then he meets Yennefer.  Who is indeed magnificent.  And she wants EVERYTHING.  She’s everything he doesn’t know how to be.

And when she refuses to accept his wish for herself, she forces him to make a wish.  And in that second, he does want.  He wants HER.  Not her love or companionship, obviously, or she’d never have been able to storm away from him in episode 6, but he still didn’t want to lose her.  

It’s not a healthy relationship by any means.  Not yet anyway.  (Maybe Jaskier can give them a pamphlet about safe BDSM practices and teach them about safewords?)  It’s not a traditionally romantic relationship at all.  But I find it absolutely compelling.

And hot.  I own my kinks.

[chikabika]

I wanna talk about Whole Cake Island too!

So, I’m reading Whole Cake Island right now. And I have THOUGHTS about Sanji and Luffy’s “”””fight””””. And it’s probably nothing anyone hasn’t said before but I’m gonna write it out anyway.

(TL;DR Sanji and Luffy fight and it hurts because they both go for the throat. Also Nami has been through this shit I am surprised she’s putting up with Sanji trying to leave in the slightest.)

So first, yeah, I’m screaming into a pillow because this shit is rough. Let’s get those personal emotions out of the way first. 

Sanji’s whole thing is that he cares and serves, right? His love language is acts of service and that’s primarily shown through feeding people. When we meet the Vinsmokes (I shall not be referring to them as his family) we see pretty quickly that they are the antithesis to everything Sanji is. 

The men are literally said to lack the ability to sympathize or empathize. Not only do we see this is the case, but Reiju says so herself:

They do not value cooking nor food. Judge tells Sanji to never cook again, Niji wastes food.

And, of course, the brothers have no qualms about hitting women. The whole chivalry/won’t hit a women thing is a huge can of worms I don’t feel like unpacking in part because I don’t feel like I could talk about it without discussing women’s power levels and roles in One Piece. And I’ve already digressed too much.

So yeah, the Vinsmokes are the opposite of Sanji and hold none of his values. In fact, they may be why he holds some of his values, because they are as far from the Vinsmoke’s values as possible.

Okay so the two chapters in particular when Luffy and Nami find and confront Sanji! 

Pretty immediately we see that 1. Sanji was not expecting them, 2. He’s distressed that they’re here, and 3. It complicates things for him.

Like, that is not a face of someone happy to see his friends who have come to save him. That is an “oh fuck” face. (And as a sidenote, yeah, it’s a whole lot harder to sacrifice yourself when you’re confronted with the people you’re leaving behind, HUH, SANJI????)

Luffy’s all happy to see him, feels like they’ve accomplished their goal, doesn’t question that Sanji would want to come back. And he’s got things to do! Like save Wano and beat up Kaido! Chop chop Sanji let’s go on adventures! Plus, I would think that Luffy would also have the expectation of his crew that they understand that no one gets to leave if they’re doing it to sacrifice themselves. He’s already shown he’s gonna come get you and Sanji knows this. Sanji’s first arc with them after Baratie was going to save Nami from Arlong and her self-sacrificial bullshit! Luffy’s modus operandi is saying “Oh, you thought you were in a lose-lose situation and the only solution was to sacrifice your happiness and well being? Fuck that! You’re my nakama, let me save you!”

Both Luffy and Nami aren’t questioning Sanji’s wanting to come with them. They’re here, it’s time to go!

And so then we see the surface level reasons why Sanji would say “No, I can’t go with you.” And we also see that he knows Judge is watching him.

I don't think Nami's buying it either. She's done this. She knows what it's like to be trapped by circumstances, to have your loved ones held hostage. And she did this shit too! She fuckin laid it down, lied to her nakama about it all being a farce in her efforts to keep them out of her dangerous situation! Maybe the words sting, but I think this face of hers is even more from her thinking about how they all know eachother so much more, and know how Luffy wouldn't leave one of them behind. So Sanji must be under some real duress right now. Like, I feel like she could extrapolate a lot from what he's saying because she knows that's not who he is. And because she's tried the same shit. And, I wonder if she’s hurting for him because she knows what it’s like.

Every chance she gets, she reiterates that there was nothing between them, that she doesn’t care about them, that she tricked them, and even uses her supposed killing of Usopp as support of her betraying them. She is desperately trying to get them off this island. Arlong is well covered, we all know what’s up.

And, the parallels are pretty clear for Sanji. He’s got family being held hostage (Zeff, and the Strawhats too), and he couldn’t leave anyway because he’s got explosion bracelets on. Plus he’s got his own self-sacrificial streak (which I could guess comes from being raised in a household where you’re told you don’t have any value and everything you do is wrong-the fact that Sanji still cried at Judge’s rejection of him right before his escape speaks to how as a child he still wanted Judge’s approval and love as a father).

So, he comes out swinging with the thing that we previously established would be the shittiest thing to say, that Luffy rejected the possibility of him saying.

And then he starts on this buckwild speech that is so fucking hammed up I almost questioned if Sanji meant for them to understand the opposite of his words, and was just putting on a show for the Vinsmokes.

Nami only says he’s going too far when Sanji starts insulting Luffy’s dream, which the whole crew believes in and supports. 

Also, as a side note, it doesn’t really make sense to me that Nami would just take on the role of “you’re going too far, you can’t believe what you’re saying!” Maybe Chopper would do that cuz he’s gullible and shit. BUT NAMI FREAKIN DID THE SAME SHIT. I would almost expect a “...” speechbubble from her and later her saying something like “He really tried his best to make that look convincing, didn’t he? He’s not very good at it.”

Nami’s savvy!

But anyway, yeah, Sanji tries to go for the throat to push thme away saying shit about Luffy not being able to become the Pirate King. My first reaction to this whole thing was: 

“WOW HE'S REALLY DOING IT, HUH? HE'S LYING THROUGH HIS TEETH TO SAY THE MOST HURTFUL SHIT HE CAN TO HIS LOVED ONES SO THEY'LL STAY AWAY SO HE CAN SACRIFICE HIMSELF TO STOP ANYONE FROM GETTING HURT”

Usopp has tried to leave too, but his situation was different. His reasons were stated clearly and he didn’t try to pretend that all the shit they’ve gone through together and the bonds they’ve formed were fake. Nami, Robin, Sanji? They try to do the “ah, I never loved you” bullshit. 

But Sanji’s is the first time that from the get-go, the audience knows before the confrontation everything that’s going on for the crewmember trying to fake betrayal. With Nami and Robin, we didn’t learn their backstories until after they tried to push people away. With Sanji not only did we get it beforehand, but when Luffy and Nami show up, we are shown the three pieces of information that Sanji thinks about and that motivate him to push his crewmates away:

His hands (his treasures) are bound and threatened.

His nakama are threatened.

Zeff is threatened.

He’s backed into a freakin corner! And he know’s Luffy’s track record on crew members trying to leave! So he goes for the throat and when that doesn’t work (or for the whole performance he’s putting on for the Vinsmokes) he attacks Luffy.

Luffy says he won’t fight Sanji, and I wonder if this is because of Water 7 and Usopp. That fight was so fucking painful, I wonder if Luffy vowed to never fight someone like that again?

Clearly he isn’t getting through to Sanji, even though, to him, Sanji should know what the deal is by now.

So he goes for the throat himself! Which is honestly just heartwrenching on Oda’s part and pretty unfair on Luffy’s part. Though, when has Luffy ever been fair lol. His whole crew agrees his selfishness levels are above emperor!

This page pretty much sums it up:

Also, throughout this entire encounter we get glimpses of Sanji thinking about the crew and meeting Luffy, which is cool to see his internal world somewhat.When Luffy first shows up. I mean. Look at the pain on his face.

This is not a “we have a difference in ideals and are fighting over it and I’m thinking about how we met because I regret that it’s come to this.” fight. It’s not even a fight. It’s Sanji desperately saying “Please leave before you die because of me!”

Actually, maybe it is kind of a fight of ideals because Sanji is fighting to say “leave me behind I’m not worth it” and Luffy’s saying “yes you are.”

For all the extremely clear things going on emotionally for people in this scene, I’m surprised Oda just left Nami’s responses at this. But, since he did, it means I get to interpret them how I please!

This could simply be read as her feeling betrayed and shit. But again, they all know the history of the crew. This could just as easily be her saying “You went too far.” or “I can’t believe you wouldn’t believe in Luffy enough to come back with us.”

I said she could probably guess at him feeling like he’s stuck, backed into a corner. And if I remember correctly she is aware that the Strawhat’s lives are threatened if Sanji doesn’t comply with Big Mom’s wishes. But she probably wouldn’t guess at the bracelets being bombs and doesn’t know (but might guess) at the Baratie being threatened too. Nami knows all about people who claim “family” as an excuse to hurt and bind you.

But basically, I would think for her, it would be a situation of her feeling like at this point Sanji should know Luffy well enough to know he won’t give up, and to trust Luffy enough to take Sanji home. So why the fuck would he try to play this game when they’ve all seen that it doesn’t work? Why say the most hurtful things he can think of? And why not just come home now?

I don’t think she’s angry at him for the betrayal he’s trying to act out, I think she’s angry at him for the betrayal he’s committing for not trusting the crew to get him out of there.

(Again, haven’t read past this part but I could absolutely see later Nami saying “do you think we acted hurt enough for them to buy it?”)

And then of course, the last four pages of the chapter where Luffy clearly calls bullshit on Sanji, saying Sanji felt the pain of his kicks more than Luffy did. And Sanji is just starting to fucking lose it. (panels from right to left)

Like, Luffy. Chill. It hurts so much! But no, he can’t just call Sanji out. He’s gotta go for the kill, present Sanji with an unacceptable situation he knows he can’t refuse. Or at least hopes he can’t refuse. Because for Luffy, Sanji leaving is an unacceptable situation.

Not only will he not eat (which, god, using that against Sanji is almost too much, fuck, Luffy), but he won’t even fucking move so get your ass back here soon before I starve, Sanji.

To use the two very deeply entrenched facts about these characters this way is sure something, huh?

Sanji will feed anyone who is hungry. He cannot stand hunger, almost.

Luffy eats all the damn time and lots and never refuses food. For him to say “i’m going on a hunger strike, I’m not eating until it’s from you” IS JUST SO MUCH.

Also side note god what cruel people to laugh at Sanji’s pain as Niji and Yonji are doing.

Sanji thought he could get away with thinking he’s expendable (just like Judge has said in every time period we’ve seen him on the page) Luffy flat out rejects that. Sanji is essential, an required part of the crew and a required part of Luffy’s dream. Just like the crew have adopted his dream as a part of all of their own ultimate goals, so Luffy is saying that they are all part of his ultimate goal. He has adopted them into him becoming the Pirate King.

And goddamn if this arc isn’t about found family. The blood of the covenant is thicker, don’t cha know.

[chenqingssuibian]

thanks for tagging me @xueyangs-pinky-finger !!!

rules: post your 2 favourite episodes of 3 of your favourite shows and tag 6 people!

ahh... alright then! I'm adding another rule - only shows I've finished!

the untamed, season 1, episode 14

does this surprise anyone? it shouldnt. this, if memory serves, is the episode of the xuanwu fight, making it Also the episode of this iconic line:

"Lan Zhan... do you like MianMian?"

oh, Wei Ying..... you're so fucking stupid.

the untamed, season 1, episode 44

there isn't really a reason. wen ning just looked Spectacular this episode. really. that's it.

cherry magic! season 1, episodes 1-12

i can't pick. cherry magic is so, so good, guys - it's impossible to pick a favorite episode!

my favorite moment, though, is probably a tie between when minato tells tsuge his feelings are mutual, and when kurosawa first confesses to adachi, reaches out to touch his face, and then drops his hand. that is a trope that always gets me. ahh, I want someone to reach out to me like that too!!!

second season wHEN-

iljimae, season 1, ~episode 8?

it has been two years since I watched iljimae (which is a classic kdrama, by the way, you Should watch it if you like lee joongi, who plays the lead) so I cannot remember which episode I liked best. however, I do remember my favorite moment!

I'll recap the plot up until the scene mentioned: iljimae whose real name I can't remember I'm so sorry baby boy was born into a noble family, but his father was framed for treason and executed. as the family of a traitor, iljimae and his family were to be sold or killed - it's implied, irrc, that iljimae, as a male, will be killed, while his sister and mother will be sold as slaves. thankfully, his life was saved by a lower-class family with connections to his father (which I won't get into here because spoilers, lmao.)

iljimae fell ill soon after his father's body was drawn and quartered (an event which... he saw. poor baby) and when he woke up, he had entirely forgotten his past. he grew up without the knowledge of his past, as a result.

shenanagins happen, and iljimae becomes, well, iljimae, stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. he gets trained in martial arts, remembers his identity, and ends up finding out where his sister is! hurray! except... well. his sister is still a slave and the daughter of a traitor. I can't remember if she is framed or if she tries to escape, but either way, she is set for public execution. iljimae comes up with a plan to save her by sabotaging the rope, but the executioner changes the rope out at the last minute.

as iljimae watches from the crowd, his sister is hung. her neck snaps instantly.

morbid, right? why is this your favorite moment, you ask? well, I'll tell you - it's the acting. lee joongi is stellar, he always has been, and 2008's iljimae was no exception - the way his face twists as iljimae's sister dies, the anguish there... it was so heartwrenching. but he couldn't scream, because then he would be found out, so he's just standing there, shaking, staring at his sister's body. ahh, it was heartbreaking... I need to go rewatch it sometime.

honourable mention: black sails

this is another case of ly not being able to remember what episode her favorite moment is in. please forgive me. it is, however, in season two!

black sails, in case you don't know, is sort of a prequel to treasure island - it follows the pirates of the story, showing how they became the villains they became. in my favorite scene, captain flint, the mainest of main characters at this point, has watched the most important woman in his life, miranda, die, and is on trial for piracy. the man who ruined his life, an old friend, governor ashe, tells him to confess so that the execution may be private.

flint glares up at him, and in a speech that you really have to watch performed to get the impact, says basically this: "everyone is a monster to someone. if I am to be your monster, then so be it." (i cant remember the exact quote off the top of my head,,, oops)

this quote-this MOMENT, really-hits so fucking hard. you have no idea how hard it hits. go watch black fucking sails, y'all.

tagging: @bitterfrosts , @yiling , @goldencorecrunches, @lanzhanshands.... @treemaidengeek ! feel free to ignore, guys!

[oumakokichi]

since youve mentioned playing YTTD, do you have any ships for it, or just any bonds in the story you enjoy?

Hmm, YTTD is one of those stories where I’m more invested in the plot and the mysteries overall than in shipping, so I haven’t given it a lot of thought!

This isn’t really meta or anything of the sort, but I’m not sure how many of my followers are caught up with YTTD spoilers, so I’ll put this under a cut just in case!

I’d say the only real romantic ship I really got attached to was Nao/Reko—they had such a great dynamic overall, I loved nearly all of their interaction. The way that Reko made so much effort to help Nao recover from Mishima’s death, the way Nao realized that something felt subtly off about Reko in the first part of chapter 2, realizing that the Fake Reko was a different person from the Reko that she’d come to know for most of the game so far… all of the development between them was so good.

I’m pretty sad Nao is dead as of the end of chapter 2 and that there’s no real way to save her (other than getting a massive bad ending, not that I blame her for lying in the main game when that was really the only option she had). I wanted to see even more of her and Reko interacting, potentially even the two of them getting out alive, so Nao’s death felt a little like her development was getting cut short. She and Reko are still both fantastic characters though.

The only other romantic ship I’m tentatively invested in that I can think of off the top of my head is Ranmaru/Sara, because what we’ve seen of their interactions in chapter 3 so far is pretty great. I like that it’s so easy for Sara to get him flustered, and that he really seems to want to genuinely help her despite the twist about the dolls’ real role in the game that Midori set up. It’s also nice to see Sara getting to befriend someone completely outside the main group that she’s gotten to know for most of the game, and having someone who can help take some of the pressure off of her instead of leaving most of the responsibilities to her.

Obviously we’ll have to see how things turn out between them in the rest of the story, but all in all, it seems like a cute ship! I’m not quite as invested in it as I am Nao/Reko, but that’s mostly just because they haven’t had as much interaction. Depending on how long Ranmaru sticks around for chapter 3, it’s possible they’ll get even more great moments together.

As for non-romantic bonds in the story that I enjoy—I have quite a lot of those! I like how character-driven YTTD feels as a story, and the varying occupations and ages of the characters allows for a lot more focus on bonds like family, or mentorship. For example, Mishima isn’t around for a very long time, but we still have time to see how much he genuinely cares about Nao and wants to protect her and help her grow into the best person she can be. When he dies, it’s a pretty horrific and heartwrenching moment even that early on because we’ve seen firsthand what a good person he is, and how much Nao looks up to him.

One of my favorite non-romantic bonds that’s been shaping up so far is probably between Sara and Sou (as in Shin, not Midori). I definitely wouldn’t say I ship them, but the actual potential for friendship between them is so good. The two of them are also such well-written narrative foils of each other, with Sara constantly on the brink of collapse from trying to hold the group together while Sou is being eaten alive by his own paranoia and desperation pretty much 24/7.

Once we know more about Sou’s mindset, it’s so easy to see why he acts the way he does towards Sara—of course every gesture of good will she makes look suspicious and calculated, knowing that she’s not only got the highest rate of survival in the entire killing game but is also so undeniably important and central to why the game is even taking place at all. There are already a lot of implications that Sou has had a rough time in the past from trusting overly-friendly, charismatic people (like Midori), so his severe mistrust of Sara specifically makes a lot more sense in hindsight.

And at the same time, Sara herself is never any less sympathetic. She’s such a fantastic protagonist: we want to root for her precisely because of how desperately she’s trying to make things work in spite of everything falling apart around her. Her trauma, particularly from feeling so personally responsible for Joe’s death, lives alongside her and shapes her every bit as much as Sou’s paranoia does. It’s equally easy to understand why she wants Sou to stop fucking around in the main game and be their ally for once, and why she keeps reaching out to him in spite of how blatantly he mistrusts her.

I would really, really love for the two of them to genuinely become friends in the Sou route of chapter 3. It’s hard to tell if that’s really going to happen—Sou is nothing but resentful right now because of Kanna’s death, and clearly biding his time to get back at the rest of the group for “killing her.” But I really hope that is what happens in the end. Between Midori and the dolls presenting a much bigger threat, and the fact that we’re probably going to finally get some important revelations about Sara’s greater role in all of this soon, I think there’s a real chance for Sou to pull through and put aside his grudges while genuinely pitching in as an ally for once.

I also absolutely adore Reko and Alice’s sibling relationship—Alice in general is one of my favorite YTTD characters so it’s always really hard picking which one of them I want to survive. The fact that both of them so clearly wanted to put the past behind them and go back to being siblings, but never actually knew how to say so or how to interact with each other during the main events of the game is just so sad. I feel like the regrets they have with each other are very compelling, and I hope we get to at least see some more interaction between them in YTTS if nothing else.

Thank you for this question, anon! It was really fun to go through and think of which character dynamics I’ve been enjoying the most in YTTD so far!

[dragonwarriorgal]

Book corner 2 - The Start

Highlander Fever!

I’m sorry. 

So it begins one night when I was having a “craving” for a certain type of a book and there I stumbled upon Darkfever. The synopsis interested me, mainly because I am SO SICK OF VAMPIRE ROMANCE STORIES, THEY ARE LITERALLY EVERYWHERE I LOOK! I tried The Black Dagger Brotherhood but by god, I could not finish even the third of it

Anyway, back on track: So I found out my preferred “flavor” of such types of books were Fae lore/romance/story, basically anything to do with Fae. I found Darkfever to be interesting concept, though I admit it was hard to keep the interest when Mac was describing the horror or some feeling she felt of some object or person for THREE PARAGRAPHS until finally telling the reader what it ACTUALLY WAS she was seeing, and as I read the next book and the next I found that this was almost exactly like watching a TV show. I mean there is a HUGE story being told there with many beginning, middle and end that was in my opinion cleverly done. With even a good cliffhanger at almost each book to hook you in to reading the next one even though it was 11:30pm and you had work at 6:30am the next morning.

I felt like a drug addict. EVEN MY PARENTS CALLED OUT ON ME FOR NOT DOING ENOUGH CHORES AROUND THE HOUSE!

Anyway, in the end I love love loved it, sure it could be a little rocky at places and when it went into the “stuff” (couldn’t think of a clever innuendo)... I’ll let the gif do the talking

and after the binge read/watch of this amazing series came the emptiness and I did some digging around about the author because I didn’t want to get spoiled and to my surprise there was another series by this blond female author about this mysterious Adam Black and the Super interesting *cough*hot*cough* MacKeltar Druids.

So I jumped right into the first pool everyone warned me about was not that great of a temperature not until you get into the third or fourth pool...

...

Let me just lay this out in the open: I CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT THIS WAS THE SAME PERSON WHO WROTE BEYOND THE HIGHLANDER MISTS AND THE FEVER SERIES!!!

BY GOD! I HAVEN’T SEEN THIS MANY CHARACTERS DO A FLIP SINCE THE FRIGGING OLYMPICS! 

It had it’s moments, confusing but nevertheless hot moments, but I knew I was in for a treat when I LAUGHED OUT LOUD FOR 5 MINUTES IN THE FUCKING THIRD PARAGRAPH. It was supposed to be serious, an innuendo for sure, but it was so cheesy I thought I would get a stomach ache or diarrhea at the end. To quote RDJ again

So instead of getting a good book/TV hybrid like her Fever series I got:

Two jealous Fae males dicking around dark and “long” haired, Braveheart Casanova in the 16th century by Outlandering a small, blond, virgin and a “beautiful-men-hating” woman from USA in the 21st century.

So I went to the next books synopsis and reviews and decided to skip 2&3, because IDGAF about 2 and I MIGHT go into 3rd, but we’ll see. 

But then the 4th is:

A small, blond and a virgin scientist from USA in the 21st century LITERALLY FALLS on a dark and “long” haired Highlander Druid from the 16th century in a coma and wakes him up. After realizing he really IS in the future, he must find a way to trust this wee lass he is falling hard for, to save the MacKeltar line in the 16th century by sending her back in time where he will lose his memories, and it is up to her to help him regain his memories by seducing the crap out of him. 

And the 5th:

A small, blond and a virgin antique expert from USA in the 21st century is trapped by the dark and “Long” haired twin brother of the previous book, because he is being possessed by 13 evil wizards for saving his brother’s life once using the time travel thingy from the Outlander series and together they must find a way through time travel paradoxes and the frigging Illuminati, but is saved by this mysterious (again might go into 3rd) Adam Black.

then the 6th(which I just finished):

Adam Black is being punished by the Faery Queen for his act in book 5 by being invisible in his favored glamour, a dark and “Long” haired Highlander blacksmith. A small, blond and a virgin, sidhe seer and a law student from USA in the 21st century happens to be the only one to see him and together they must find a way with the help of the MacKeltar Four to roll the events that lead into the Fever series.

....

Now there is a pattern here somewhere from this blond author, but I just can’t keep my finger on...

Now despite the fact that I am going to read the 7th book tomorrow, because it’s 11:30pm and I have work at 7am tomorrow. And despite the fact that I am starting to get sick and tired of the small blond American virgin falling in love with yet another dark and long haired Highlander and because English is my second language and I have a fucking hard time reading those accents and burrs and doona’s and whatnots. I freaking love reading about the MacKeltars! They were so interesting minor characters in the Fever series and there was CLEARLY a story about them that I was aching to read about. And when I found out that there actually is a whole series about them...

Despite the ABYSMAL rocky start, it has been a journey to see Karen’s writing bloom from an ugly, not well kept seed, into a heartwrenching flower. I look forward to reading Spell of the Highlander tomorrow after work and finish this series

[dahniwitchoflight]

Candy 12-14

Even Jake’s having his proverbial love triangle troubles

It’s clear he genuinely cares for both Jane and Dirk, but if he’s being honest with himself, the one he romantically loves would be Dirk, the one he would prefer to be with, who he’d choose if they were equal options, would be Dirk

But he’s also right that it’s not like Jane’s a bad choice either, sure it’s not his preference if he’s being honest, but he’s also not about to look the gift horse in the mouth if it falls right into his lap

13 is where we start start to see the unraveling happen I suppose though

Again, everyone is acting so drugged up in Candy

Jane and Jake getting literally inebriated and Dave acting like he’s going through Dirk withdrawal

Then Gamzee being the weird ugly poster child of both drugs and candy, honestly it really did make sense to shove him into this timeline in a weird and uncomfortable ham fisted way, it gets that “are you fucking high right now” feeling across really well

Gamzee really being the cloud cuckoolander here though

hold on let me un-gamzee-ify it just reading his text quirk makes me feel like im on drugs

Gamzee: you don’t got any need to go and concern yourself with his mortal flesh body out here in this candycane whirlpool beyond the infinite black wink of the wicked singularity, my ninja.

Gamzee: a sack of meat and bones in one life or the next is only a means to the final totality that will damn and raise us all in brilliant apotheosis.

Gamzee seems clearly meta aware of the situation he’s in which is interesting, This is indeed a candy swirled timeline hidden inside an infinite black hole singularity

the second line seems to be describing the meat timeline in a way though too

a sack of meat sounds worthless, but it is apparently only a means to a truer end, it has to happen for something else to happen

Essential, but irrelevant, again

funnily enough he’s also seems to be referencing gnostic concepts, not that i’m surprised really at this point

one sack of meat, or, one body in one life or the next

so reincarnation

is only a means to an end that both damns and raises a person into apotheosis, or their “zenith” their highest point

which, i mean, yeah, you live life again and again, differently each time, becoming closer to ascension, and ultimate consumation of every version of you is the basic tenet of the reincarnation gnosticisms

Also, a lot of text was put into describing Gamzee haphazardly crashing into things and setting off rube goldberg machines, which I guess sort of describes his escapades through Homestuck lol

“cinder block, crusty puppet, and Japanese sword in a tornado’s radius off balance and avalanching them catastrophically onto the hapless clown’s torso. “

So the Sword is Dirk (or AR) the crusty puppet is Caliborn (because Lil Cal) which I guess leaves the cinder block as Equius? He’s built like a brick shithouse? eh only problem sleuth stuff comes up so 2/3 ain’t bad

Speaking of Equius, oh look, A feminine half finished robot in Dirk’s basement

the uncomfortable Equius vibes ping once again though I don’t think this is robo-Aradia, but likely something meant to serve a similar purpose and almost DEFINITELY Rose related if reading meat wasn’t already obvious and if the skull for an inner head thing wasn’t immediately referring to the headaches Rose was known to have

though it’s also uncomfortably a symbol of her Doom

---14---

���A flip of the cosmic coin has rendered your entire life completely inessential.”

yup what did I just say, Meat is representing the essential bits of the story, candy is decidedly, not

hm, Dirk’s going to kill himself for the supposed greater good of his own making again

not unsurprising, but a guy like him always like to make an escape rather than give up, is he thinking death will unlock this part of his conciousness and send the memories back to the ultimate self? probably

“and one final act of relevance that can bequeath your meager energies to the cosmic well from whence they came.”

yup!

Though as much as he keeps saying none of this matters he did leave an explanatory note specifically for his friends to find, so there’s still something in him that cares

Don’t like how the bigger blacker text is basically instructing this version of Dirk to kill himself though, that again implies there’s part of Dirk that are subservient to other parts, so again it’s a question of if his ultimate self got tainted through the connecting pieces of Arquisprite > Lord English > Doc Scratch, then who’s actually pulling the strings in Dirk’s Ultimate Self and directing the behaviour of “Dirk” in general

Is it Dirk Strider? Or Doc Scratch? and does that even matter anymore since it’s all DS all the same anyway?

“In a certain sense, you’ve never felt so free.

> Kill yourself.”

That’s hilariously also a JailBreak reference, I think, but definitely played for the morbs instead of as a joke lol

https://www.homestuck.com/jailbreak/109

Literally this MC kills himself when his friend dies and he’s now alone in a vast cosmic emptiness and the text is:

“Yes! Finally! Free at last!

Though the victory is bitersweet. Your friend has died of blood loss.

This is no victory. The feeling is vast emptiness. You are no longer bound by bars or concrete, but you feel more incarcerated than ever. You come to the heartwrenching conclusion that the only true prison... is loneliness.

There is only one thing left to do.

> Continue”

and it just resets him back to the first panel but this time he makes choices differently

ironic that Dirk does literal the exact same thing but comes to exactly zero of the same conclusions

“Just as your epiphany occured at sunset, your death must occur at sunrise to complete the ouroboros of symbological harmonic resonance that is your personal arc. It is the very last moment of narratively consequential action that will happen in this whole, barren world.”

I wonder what about this death makes it so narratively significant? just because it passes along the knowledge of what not to do back to the Ultimate Self so he can avoid it? Probably nothing more than that

“but there really are no words that can adequately express the sound someone makes when they die. It’s a phenomenon that happens on two levels. First, there is the literal termination of organic processes, which is to say, the destruction of the meat. Then follows the dissolution of the ego. And you have quite the ego to dissolve, one that has flown so high above the forest that not only can it no longer see the trees, it cannot even conceive of the trees as material substance with objective meaning.”

funny it mentions a forest which is also where that happened in JailBreak

Basically describes how death in general works in Homestuck, the body dies but can leave a ghost/ego behind, but eventually that dissolves as well

Again though, making a compariosn between the Meat and the Body/Flesh and the Candy and the Spirit or Ghost

or another pun between Candy and Drugs if you take Spirit to mean alcoholic spirits

Candy seems ironically and symbolically the place where Breath Meets Void, no wonder John and Roxy hook up here lol

Does that make Meat then the place where Blood and Light meet? I have before put significance into the crossover of those symbolisms in Homestuck before, but couldn’t really conceptulize it as a solid symbolic thing and the Meat and epilogues in general did a really good job of conjoining them into the idea of the story what with the Narrative having importance but also Veins and the idea of Karkat as being reliable narrator etc etc

Meat’s as good a symbol as any for that I suppose

“ When you think so little of yourself as a moral character, any act of self-termination will result in a death that is Just. “

so this line seems to imply that Dirk’s death was permanent and Just here because he thought so little of his own moral character aka deep down he knew he was terrible person, amount of remorse felt over that not applicable, and because of that perception of his, the clock tick tocked over on to Just

Again reinforcing that the Clock is less of an ultimate moral judgment from down on high and much more like an influenceable moral compass, given form by the person affecting it at the moment

I actually kinda like the new spin on that it gives Vriska’s original just death, since that slow ticking of the clock was not just a decision, but a battle of wills between herself and Terezi, it could have easily gone either way depending on how each saw Vriska

neat!

[opalgelance]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT BATTLE OF HEART AND MIND WAS A LITERAL MIND FUCK

- WHITE DECOLORING GEMS

- THE DIAMOND FAMILY WAS REALLY FUCKED UP

- WHITE FUCKING BROKE STEVEN AND PINK LOST HER FUCKING MIND

- ROSE CAN NEVER COME BACK

- EVERY CRYSTAL GEM HAS A NEW OUTFIT I HAVE NO FAVORITE BECAUSE I LOVED THEM ALL

- EVERY CG + STEVEN FUSION WAS STUFFED IN HERE AS WELL AS MY TIED FOR FAVORITE WITH OPAL FUSION, OBSIDIAN

- FUCKING LAVA FUSION I LOVE HER SO MUCH THE CRACKS IN HER HAIR AND HER MAGMA SPIT THAT BECAME A FUCKING SWORD KILLED ME

- RAINBOW FEELS VERY FAMILIAR WHO VOICES THEM???

- SUNSHINE IS LEGIT A LOVE YOURSELF COMMERCIAL FROM THE 90S IN A CORPOREAL FORM

- FUCKING PINK STEVEN STILL SCARES THE EVER LOVING SHIT OUT OF ME HOLY FUCK

- WHITE HAS A WHOLE CHARACTER ARC IN 5 MINUTES

- SO DO BLUE AND YELLOW

- JASPER NEVER FUCKING TALKS BUT

- WE SEE A WHOLE FUCK TON OF GEM DESIGNS INCLUDING JASPER, BIGGS, CENTIPEEDLE, THE BEETLES, THE PUFFERFISH, AND A LOT MORE

- IM STILL NOT OVER THE PINK STEVEN THING IT WILL LEGITAMaTELY HAUNT ME FOREVER

- EDIT: I forgot to add how mindblowing the animation is in the Pink Steven scene?!?! I was just so stunned by the scene itself that I didn’t mention that the lines are SO clean and crisp, and the animation literally looks 3D, and that seems to be because the legendary James Baxter did it, and from what I saw from his work on the Adventure Time episode, he’s an absolute master in the art of animation, and I feel like I’ve been blessed seeing that animation with my own damn eyes

Ok, now that I’ve calmed down a bit, I have to say it felt really REALLY rushed but I still enjoyed it a lot! I do have a few gripes with it though:

- I wish we could have seen Sunstone, Rainbow 2.0, and Obsidian before this, or at the very least seen Sun and Rainbow before, with Obsidian being this big stressful event because as we’ve seen 4+ Gem fusions like Alexandrite can be very hard to keep stable, and they had one chance to fuse and keep it together

- Steven said one sentence to Pink Pearl, and White didn’t recognize CG Pearl, which is really weird. Pink didn’t even react to Steven, or realize that he had Pink’s Gem. We don’t learn what happened to Pink Pearl either. Steven seems to already have connected that White’s Pearl was once Pink’s, and when talking to White, it seems like he is understanding what his Pink dreams really meant, which is weird bc it seemed like he didn’t understand that they were memories before.

- I felt like with the exception of the Pink Steven scene, the Diamond fight at the very beginning and the confrontation between all 4 Diamonds, it didn’t really feel like the characters were reacting as much as they should have? Like, it takes a second for Pearl to figure out that she and Steven fused, and her reaction is kind of cut off, but Garnet doesn’t really react to fusing with Steven? I also feel like Obsidian should have been a bigger deal to everyone, but it felt like Garnet was like “ok, lets form obsidian then” like they’ve done it a thousand times?? Yeah, they’ve fused with Rose before, but Steven? And Alexandrite has always been a big deal, since she’s so unstable, while on multiple occasions in season 1 the Gems were pretty clear that fusion was for emergencies only. Obsidian is literally a White Diamond only level emergency, but while it was a big deal for the audience, the CGs (including Connie, Bismuth, Lapis, and Peridot)  weren’t as shocked by this as I would have thought? Peridot says “they’re huge!” or smth like that, but not much else. For me it was really frustrating when Blue and Yellow, and ESPECIALLY Amethyst, Garnet, and Pearl, were drained of their color, it felt like it SHOULD have been a Keeping It Together level of horror, but it wasn’t on the characters’ faces, which was disappointing. It took me out of the action on my first viewing because it looked like the CGs weren’t that bothered by it. WHITE IS LITERALLY MIND CONTROLLING THE DIAMONDS AND YOUR FAMILY STEVEN WHAT THE FUCK I have to say that the Pink Steven scene was legitimately disturbing, and I applaud the storyboarders for that, I just wish it could’ve continued throughout all of the horrifying scenes.

- Steven didn’t tell anyone about his Gem being ripped out, possibly because there wasn’t any time left in the episode, and that was really weird to me. Like, you got HALF OF YOUR SOUL RIPPED OUT STEVEN. Like, White and Connie HAD to have said something, right? Was it just not shown?

- That brings me to how ridiculously rushed the ending was, because here’s what happens in the last 5 or so minutes (seriously, I’m looking at the time the ending starts)

      - Steven gets home while Sadie’s having a concert on the beach

     - WITH THE FUCKING DIAMONDS

    - Lars also gets home with the Off Colors

    - Sadie and Lars say hi for an awkward amount of screentime

    - THE DIAMONDS HEAL THE CORRUPTED GEMS INCLUDING JASPER, CENTIPEEDLE AND A LOT OF THE GEMS WE’VE SEEN OVER THE SERIES AND THERES NO DIALOGUE BC STEVEN IS SINGING A SONG OVER THIS WHOLE PART

     - The Diamonds leave, seriously, after less than a minute of screentime on Earth

    - The CGs are on the beach, with NO recently cured corrupted Gems to be seen, and it’s kind of like the theme song, with Greg grilling hot dogs, and the CGs sit on the beach with Steven (just Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl now) and Steven sings a song. The End.

It just felt really rushed? So were the Diamonds’ “redemptions”, but this was insane. Every plot line in the whole series is supposed to be solved in 5 minutes? I mean, there’s a lot left unanswered, but it felt like they were trying to tie everything up with a nice bow, and it was rushed. Also, you know how everyone said that the Gem designs at the ball were lazy and that we only saw a few new Gem types because the crew didn’t have time to design new Gems? (I personally really liked the cog Gems bc I love gear designs but I know a lot of people didn’t like them and that’s valid) BULLSHIT LOOK AT ALL OF THE UNCORRUPTED GEM DESIGNS THEY LOOK AWESOME. But why could they not have done that before? They designed at least 10 new Gems for a minute or two long scene. Yeah, they were based on the already done corrupted Gem designs, but that’s fine! We could have easily seen Ocean and Biggs Jaspers at the ball, or even at the Zoo, in a flashback (like We’re Only Falling Apart, the war scene in Single Pale Rose, Your Mother and Mine), the ending of Legs From Here to Homeworld, but we didn’t, and I can’t understand why. Now it’s strange that we didn’t see any uncorrupted counterparts on Homeworld. What, is every single corrupted Gem part of a super rare Gem type? Yes, we’ve SEEN Jaspers before, and we HEARD about Nephrites, but even at the start of this episode we had some cool silhouettes of Gems, just like in The Answer, and they were never fleshed out into actual Gems. It’s just kind of strange that they had all of these templates but never used them. Plenty of fans have used the silhouettes and corrupted Gem designs to make Gemsonas, but the crew couldn’t? Just paste the color palette of Biggs or Ocean onto a Jasper base and you’re good! That’s essentially what happened this episode but I STILL LOVE THEM SO MUCH I will protect Ocean, the Beetle, the Centipeedles and the waterbear Gem with my life, BUT they could have appeared MUCH sooner as background Homeworld Gems

- EDIT: Since I’m always criticizing the animation and character models, I feel like I have to note how impressed I am with a majority of the animation in this episode. I felt like during the Blue vs. Yellow scene in particular though, Yellow’s expressions felt... odd. LET ME EXPLAIN FIRST PLEASE. See, for me, while I don’t like exaggerated facial expressions most of the time, I can get past them as long as it’s for comedy relief or to express raw emotion. The problem for me was that Yellow’s expressions were drawn as if she was supposed to be in a comedic scene instead of a heartwrenching, emotional outbreak uncharacteristic of Yellow, where you are supposed to feel with her, to feel her pain. But for me, it felt like she was pulling faces like she was trying to make a crying baby laugh, and I felt like Patti Lupone’s expressive, heart-wrenching voice acting didn’t match up with what I was seeing on the screen. 

  - As I said above, James Baxter’s Pink Steven animation slayed me, I’m still dying haaa

   - OBSIDIAN WAS THE BOMB/COM THO her hair is so amazingly detailed, it had to be hard to animate that.

  - Most of the lines were crisp. One of my main criticisms is how starting in season 3, while the animation and art quality went down, both were hindered further by the blurry lines, which I KNOW is because they resized the art. When I’m resizing an arm, or the head when it’s out of proportion, the resized lines become blurry whether you’re shrinking or expanding a section of a piece. But in this episode the lines were pretty crisp for probably 80% percent of the episode? And I’m counting all 44 minutes, and considering how bad it usually is, I’m very pleased.

tl;dr I LOVE THESE EPISODES TO HOMEWORLD AND BACK but there are a few issues I just can’t see past and some of these issues just threw me out of a great episode to ask myself why??? But also I’ve rekindled my love for Steven Universe and FOR ONCE I can see past some of the bad character models and animation because this episode was just so good!!!