#what the *fuck* am I supposed to do knowing that?

[cloverandstuff]

New comic released, and it's about Till and his mom, whose name is apparently Io; lets fucking break this down.

So basically, this whole comic breaks the regular pattern where the person's death or plans to die are mentioned.

Instead, the whole thing is mainly focused on Till and how hopeful his mother was for him. It doesn't even hint at the death, it's just Till finding himself in music, and art.

Till loved music. He loved singing.

And his mother was terrified of that.

She was only supposed to be the provider for Till. Basically his creator and nanny until he showed enough promise to be a human pet.

But still, the mother cared and she cared so much, she didn't stop him from doing what he loved.

Even though she knew that the day would come that the aliens would take away Till, she still let him sing cause it brought him so much joy.

It's also made clear that these people, whereever or whatever theyre meant to be, aren't educated at all.

Io doesn't know what singing is, and she thinks of then as cries. She only sees them on stage, where they are cruelly ended.

She doesn't even know what motherly instincts are meant to be. She's curious about whether or not other providers feel this way as well.

All she knows is to pray to the Anakt for the safety of her child. This religious theme plays a larger role in everything. ( And I am unsure if this is a system implemeted to control people or if the aliens genuinely believe it.)

And once she is taken away from her child, she hopes that there are traces of her left behind. Which it seems to be the case, with the comic strongly implying that his art is very much connected to his mom.

It's also stated that her wish was for Till, which she didn't even know was his name, to not be a lonely child.

And we, as an audience, are shown that he did not grow to be a lonely child. He made friends, who surrounded him, and cared about him.

I also kinda find it funny that out of everyone, Till is the only one who had a good relationship with his blood family.

He had a mother who, even if she didn't know what it was, loved him and doted on him just like a mother should. She protected him and his happiness for as long as she was allowed and seemingly fought back when he was taken from her.

I am curious if Io is still alive. Till looks identical to her, so if she does see him on screen, she'll probably know he's hers. And considering they show the Alien Stage show where she's trapped, it's not out of the realm of possibility that she saw the Final Round.

[why-rock-look-tasty-if-no-eat]

Or even where the fuck it is. I'm in so much pain that I don't even notice when I stub my toes or drop something on them. Just finding out what's wrong is so that I can know that what I am going through is real, as so many people like to pretend it's just me doing drug seeking behavior.

I once had a doctor I went to, told him I can't feel my toes due to a hip injury that hasn't been looked into by doctors for two years by that point, and do you want to know what he said to me after wrapping up the appointment? The appointment that was supposed to be me getting an MRI for the first time after three x-rays but was changed to a check-up without my knowledge until he came into the room?

He said "Do you want drugs for your pain?" He asked a person who went to him telling him that after feeling electricity and pins and needles shoot down their entire leg for two years, and was now experiencing a loss of sense of touch. If you want to know what I feel, wear a rubber glove on your foot and walk around and consciously step with that foot. Since I can't feel it all that well, I don't know where it's at so I have to consciously step with that foot. That fucker made me cry when he asked me that question because I knew he just wanted to cop me out for drug seeking behavior.

So that turned into a bit of a rant about my useless doctors, but I promise that we don't want a diagnosis for the 'attention' or for drugs. We're human. We just want to understand why our bodies are betraying us.

Something I want able bodied people to understand is that I don't want a diagnosis cause I wanna be sick so bad; I want a diagnosis because there is already something wrong with my body but I don't know what the fuck it is.

[y3sterdaysproblem]

smoke and mirrors - chris sturniolo

chapter one

summary: your best friend Matt backs out of plans you had made together, so you replace him with his brother. the only problem is the two of you can’t stand each other.

{enemies to lovers, fake dating}

includes : explicit language, fluff, smut(penetration, oral, fingering, etc.), angst if you squint, lots of bickering, slow burn

wc: 2.4k

-

a/n: first series! it won’t be super long, but I hope you enjoy. send requests for more fics!

-

“Matt, you can’t back out now!” You huff, crossing your arms over your chest as you stare at your best friend where he lays on his bed, setting his phone down to look up at you.

“I’m sorry, love, something came up and I can’t make it,” he apologizes, shrugging his shoulders. “I can’t get out of it.”

You groan, throwing your head back in frustration. You had a family wedding to attend and already RSVP’d with a plus one, which was supposed to be your best friend Matt, who had lovingly agreed to pretend to be your boyfriend for the night. Your family was super invasive about you getting a boyfriend, and you wanted to avoid all of the comments and questions by just pretending to have a boyfriend for one night at the wedding, but your plan was falling apart.

“What am I supposed to do? I already told everyone I was coming with somebody, they’re gonna know I was lying if I show up by myself,” you tell him, trying to rack your brain for any ideas.

“You could bring Nick,” Matt suggests, picking his phone back up and going back to scrolling.

You scoff. “Yeah right, like Nick could pretend to be straight for an entire night. He’d be caught in less than an hour.” You shake your head, moving to sit on the edge of the bed next to Matt. “I’m gonna have to go on, like, Bumble or something and find some random to go with me.”

Matt looks up at you over his phone, waiting for you to lock eyes with him before he starts to speak. “I mean… I know one other guy you could ask.”

You tilt your head, excited to hear the suggestion, before you realize who he’s talking about and your eyes widen, head shaking rapidly. “Absolutely not,” you put your hands up, pointer fingers crossed over in an X. “I am not asking Chris, no way.”

Matt raises his eyebrows and purses his lips. “I told you I knew someone, I didn’t say you’d like what I said.”

You roll your eyes. “He would never say yes to me anyway, even if I did want to ask him.”

Matt shrugs. “Maybe. You could always bribe him, he loves a good bribe.”

You think about it for another moment, knowing it would be easier to get Chris to do it than it would to find some random guy to go to a wedding as a first date, but the thought of spending an entire night next to Chris made your skin crawl.

The two of you had never really gotten along, even with you being around as much as you were, you guys never clicked, in fact it was the complete opposite, always insulting each other any chance you got, ignoring each other, and always avoiding being in the same room by yourself, even if only for a few moments.

“I mean… I could try but I really can’t promise I won’t kill your brother, Matt,” you half joke, but not really. “Might turn you into a twin.”

“That’s fucked,” Matt laughs, using his foot to kick you lightly. “I‘ll still be a triplet, even if you kill him. I’ll just be a triplet with severe depression and no will no live.”

“You’re so dramatic,” you tell him through a laugh. “Your life would be so much quieter, wouldn’t that be nice? You’d secretly thank me for killing him.”

Matt shakes his head at you with a smile, though his eyes tell you he thinks you’re crazy, before looking back down at his phone.

“Killing who?” A voice sounds from the doorway and you look up to see the man of the hour staring back at you, a disinterested look on his face.

“You,” you smile sweetly up at Chris.

“That’s nice,” he says, flashing you a fake, tight lipped smile before turning to his brother. “Hey, can you take me to go get food?”

Matt groans and throws his head back, closing his eyes. “But I’m so comfortable,” he whines.

You take a deep breath and consider your options. Chris, who you hate but have known for years, or a random guy who might be a serial killer? You’d definitely be safer with Chris, but the thought of having to be near him without his brothers for an entire night seemed like hell. Especially having to act like you were pleased to be in his presence.

“I’ll take you,” you speak before you can stop yourself.

Both Matt and Chris look at you with shocked expressions, Chris having a bit of disgust in his eyes.

“I’d rather starve, thanks,” Chris replies. “Matt, c’mon seriously, can you take me?” He asks again.

“Chris,” you say in a stern voice, standing up from the bed and walking towards him. “Let me take you. I need to talk to you.”

Chris watches you walk past him through the doorway and then looks back at Matt, shooting him a confused look, to which his brother just shrugs, before he leaves to follow you, finding you by the front door slipping your crocs on.

“The fuck is this about?” He asks, trotting down the stairs to meet you by the front door. “You in love with me or some shit?”

You look up at him with an unamused expression. “You wish I was in love with you.” You huff. “I told you, I gotta talk to you.”

You open the front door and head outside towards your car, opening the drivers side door. You look behind you and see Chris standing in the doorway, staring after you. “I’ll buy your food,” you tell him, and he immediately shuts the door behind him and walks up to your car. “You should’ve led with that!” He says.

You both get in your car and you start driving. “Where do you want to go?” You ask him, turning your head to see him on his phone. “Chris,” you push, reaching out to smack his phone out of his hand, causing it to land on the floor.

“What the fuck, dude. Unnecessary.” Chris huffs, reaching down to grab his phone, but he tucked it between his legs instead of going back on it. “I don’t know, McDonald’s?”

You groan. “You always get McDonald’s. Can’t we get like Popeyes or something?”

Chris looks at you, raising an eyebrow. “Well I didn’t know you were gonna eat, too, jesus. Sure, Popeyes is fine.” He goes for his phone again, but you reach out and grab his hand, stopping him.

“Wait,” you start. “I actually do need to talk to you.”

Chris sighs and puts his phone away in his pocket completely, looking over at you. “Okay, spit it out then.”

You flash a glare at him quickly before returning your eyes to the road. “So… Matt was going to be my plus one for a wedding I’m going to, but he can’t go anymore because something came up, and I can’t ask Nick because he’s gay and that just won’t work, and so that just leaves you.” You tell him nervously.

“So what if he’s gay, your family homophobic or something?” Chris asks, annoyance lacing his voice.

You sigh and pull into the Popeyes parking lot, pulling into a spot and throwing the car into park before you turn your body to face Chris. “No, they’re not homophobic. It’s just… I kind of told them I was bringing a boyfriend.”

Chris stares at you for a moment before laughing, completely unserious. “You? A boyfriend? That’s hilarious. I can’t believe you’re lying to your family about having a boyfriend.”

You don’t laugh though, you just drop your eyes down to your lap, knowing that this was exactly how the conversation would go.

“Wait a minute, that means you want me to pretend I’m your boyfriend? Fuck no, I’d rather be single for the rest of my life. Forget it, dude, you’re shit outta luck with me.” Chris shakes his head, bringing a hand up to run through his hair.

You nod and start backing out of the spot, heading towards the drive-thru. “Yeah I figured that was how you’d respond,” you murmur.

You guys order your food, and you still pay for it, staying true to your word, before heading home. It was a quick but quiet ride back, both of you getting out of the car without a word, not even a ‘thank you’ shot your way. You take your shoes off and head back up to Matt’s room, seeing him in the same position you left him in, only now he was watching a movie, and you got in his bed to join him with your food.

“How’d it go?” He asked, reaching out to steal one of your fries.

“Exactly how I expected it to go. He laughed in my face and said he’d rather be single for the rest of his life than pretend to be my boyfriend,” you tell Matt, looking down at him from where you sat.

Matt smiles up at you, reaching out to pat your leg. “Sorry, kid. You tried.”

You nod and look up at the tv screen, starting to eat your dinner.

-

The next day, you’re sitting on your couch panting your toes and watching your favorite comfort show when you hear the doorbell ring, startling you as you weren’t expecting anybody over today. You look down at your toes and swear under your breath, seeing that you smeared polish along your skin.

You set down the polish on the table and stand up, walking to your door and pulling it open, jaw dropping in shock when you come face to face with Chris, the last person you expected to show up at your door unannounced. You almost wanted to rub your eyes in case you were mistaking him for another triplet, but you knew your eyes didn’t deceive you.

“Chris?” You question. “How did you get here?”

He rolls his eyes at you. “I ubered?” He says like it’s obvious. “You gonna let me in or what?”

You take a step back and let him into your house, shutting the door behind him. “So, to what do I owe the pleasure?” You say, sitting back down on your couch. He follows and sits at the opposite end, looking over at you.

He ignores your question, watching you as you continue to do your toes, cleaning up the mess you made. “Why not just get your toes done?” He asks.

You look at him with an annoyed expression. “Costs money? Why spend money when I can sit around and do it myself?” You go back to painting your toes. “Why are you here?”

Chris shrugs. “Been thinking about what you said yesterday, about the wedding.”

You stop what you’re doing and put the polish back down, turning your attention on Chris completely. “Did you change your mind?” You ask him.

He sighs and licks his lips before speaking. “Consider it my charity for the year,” he smiles, tilting his head at you. “But I need a small favor from you.”

“A favor in return isn’t charity, Chris, it’s like… eye for an eye or whatever.” You look at him deadpan. Of course he’d want something in return, he could never do something for you out of the goodness of his heart.

“Whatever, dude, you want my help or not?” Chris asks. “If not I’ll just leave, doesn’t make a difference to me.”

You huff and give in. “Fine. What’s the favor?” You ask him.

He pulls out his phone, scooting a bit closer to you on the couch. “There’s this girl that will not stop hitting me up and she’s driving me crazy. I told her I’m not interested, I’ve ignored her messages, I even blocked her on snap to see if she’d get the hint but she still texts me every day.” He shows you all of the unanswered messages and your jaw drops.

“Holy shit, what does this girl see in you?” You laugh, reading how desperate she was for Chris.

“Funny,” Chris replies, unamused.

“What does this have to do with me?” You ask him, looking back up at his face.

“I think it’s only fair if I pretend to be your boyfriend at the wedding, you pretend to be my girlfriend on social media. Only for a few weeks or until she stops messaging me. Plus, you’re way hotter than her. ” Chris tells you, and by the tone of his voice, he’s completely serious.

You feel heat rising up your neck and you try to get it under control before your cheeks turn red. “You think I’m hot?” You ask him, a teasing lilt in your voice.

“Not the point,” he replies.

“So you tell me that you would rather be single for the rest of your life than pretend to be my boyfriend, and now you want me to pretend I’m your girlfriend?” You clarify, and he just nods, like it’s no big deal. “Pretending to be together at an event is one thing, but you want to take photos to look like a couple? That’s a little… intimate don’t you think?”

Chris shrugs his shoulders. “I’m a big boy, you’re a big girl. Don’t think you can handle a little physical touch without falling for me?” He smirks, leaning in closer to you.

You grimace and reach up to push his shoulder away. “Gross, dude. I could have sex with you and still not fall in love with you and your terrible personality.”

Chris gasps, fake shocked, throwing a hand to his chest. “I am a very good lover, why do you think this girl won’t stop texting me?”

Your eyes widen. “You had sex with her?!” You shriek. “Chris, no wonder she keeps blowing your shit up!”

Chris groans and throws his head back, leaning it on the back of the couch. “It was supposed to be a one time thing, I don’t know why she’s so hung up on me!”

You find yourself giggling a bit before you stop and clear your throat, not wanting to give Chris the satisfaction of making you laugh. You compose yourself and shake your head, clearly disappointed in the boy across from you. “Fine, I’ll pretend to be your girlfriend, but no kissing! I draw the line at kissing.”

“Oh, you don’t have to worry, I don’t want to kiss you,” Chris cringes. “So… I guess we should start planning this?”

You nod and smile towards him, placing your hands in your lap as you guys start to figure out how to execute both individual plans.

-

a/n: this chapter is SUPER short but it’s kinda just to get a feel of the fic and how it’s gonna play out. I really hope you guys like this series im so nervous about it!!

taglist

@liiixsturniolos @madelinesturn @st6niolo @mattslolita @ifwdominicfike @sophand4n4 @chris-hallelujah @sophsturns @ariana2saucyy @045696

[fallstaticexit]

Ahhh it's been 65 years, and I feel kinda crazy that I've had this sitting in my drafts for like 2 months. Assuming most readers of Missing Moments are also The Art of Being Seen readers- there's some hefty lore here that will come into play later.

prev/ next

Olive: Time to move on, right Kia?

[phone pings]

Nancy: Hello darling. Do you have a moment to talk?

Olive: Who’s this?

Olive: I don’t recall saying yes.

Nancy: [sighs] It feels so good to hear your voice again.

Olive: I only answered to tell you to block me.

Nancy: I would never.

Olive: Even though I asked?

Nancy: Well. I am incredibly selfish.

Olive: Why did you call me?

Nancy: I would like to see you, Olivia. Please.

Olive: I’m not for sale, sorry.

Nancy: I know. I wouldn’t want to meet on those terms again. If I could do it all over, I would have asked you to have dinner with me when I met you. I would have courted you properly, Olivia.

Olive: [scoffs] You would have gone to a strip club and asked a stripper to have dinner with you? Seriously? When would we have ever met under any other circumstance? It’s been made very clear to me how different we are. The only way this would have happened was if it were a fairy tale.

Nancy: What matters is, I have met you. I’ve experienced you and I can’t go back. My husband- my ex husband- he signed the petition for our divorce. I came out to him- officially. It’s over.

Olive: [stunned] That’s- that’s great. I am so happy for you-

Nancy: I’m leaving all of it. I’m starting over. All I want is you, if you’ll have me.

Olive: [sighs]

Nancy: Let’s just have one dinner and after we’ve talk, then you can decide. There’s so much I want to say, but I want to look you in the eyes as I say it.

Olive: One dinner?

Nancy: One dinner.

Nancy: May I see you tonight? I’ll send my driver and I’ll cook for you at my place. Anything you like.

Olive: Tonight is fine.. sure.

Nancy: [sighs happily] It’ll be hard not to kiss you the moment I see you-

Olive: Not too much, lover girl. It’s one dinner and I’m still very annoyed with you about all this, ok?

Nancy: Yes, my love. I’ll see you tonight.

Olive: And don’t look at me like that. It’s just dinner and a conversation, ok? I am not going to sleep with her ok?

Malcolm: Well. Now I see why my mother was so willing to ruin an entire empire over you. Those mugshots did you no justice.

Olive: What is this? Where’s Nancy?

Malcolm: I noticed our driver was heading this way, I figured I’d tag along. Sight see. Get in. Let’s chat.

Malcolm: I wonder if this feels like dejavu to my mother. She makes yet another thoughtless mistake and someone comes along to make it all go away. She has a nasty habit of that, you know.

Olive: Listen. I’m not feeling whatever family drama you all have going on. I don’t want to talk to you. I want to talk to Nancy.

Malcolm: I was raised by a narcissistic liar and a spineless coward. If I let this company fall apart, then wouldn’t it all had been for nothing?

Olive: [scoffs] So you want pity? I’m suppose to pity you? Give me a break.

Malcolm: Not pity, no. If anything, I pity you.

Olive: Is that right?

Malcolm: When it comes to success, you pale in comparison to your half siblings. You’ve financially crippled your parents in legal fees since your arrest and all you have to show for it is by shaking ass in a low end strip club in the Spice District. That’s right, I know alot about you Olivia Briar.

Malcolm: I know about that quaint little family of yours down in the country. I know about your niece’s struggling restaurant and her undocumented partner. Funny, he’s able to acquire loans under a fake name but there’s no records of a Noa Briar anywhere. I wonder what else your family is hiding.

Olive: [shaken] What is this about? Are you threatening me? What the fuck do you want?

Malcolm: I’m here to help you, not hurt you. One of the greatest lessons I’ve ever learned was the power of the dollar. I can make a lot of your problems go away with one deposit if you do just one thing.

Olive: [softly] ....What?

Malcolm: We’re going to turn around and park in front of your building. You’re going to go upstairs, pack up your things and then, you’re going to go back home to sweet old Henford. You’ll pay your parents back with the money you’ll receive from this arrangement and you’ll help your niece and nephew. All your problems - poof- gone.

Malcolm: All you have to do is walk away, and stay away. You see, my mother has a nasty debt to this family she still needs to pay. Don’t make it your burden.

[mywritersmind]

THREE DAYS. TWO CONFESSIONS. - KA12

summary : A pair of flirty teens with rich parents and talent running through their blood. In three days of running into eachother in black and red, the pair seem to come to the conclusion that maybe their jokes aren’t too far off from the truth.

listen up : suggestive jokes. dual pov!! mutual pining! banter! kimixbearman!reader. idk apparently i have a thing for wrong kimi x photographers

word count : 3740

⋆｡‧˚⋆

I’m staring at him.

He’s talking to an engineer from Mercedes, leaning against a table with his arms braced against it. Fuck his arms. Tan and veiny, gripping the table.

His curls bounce as he nods, his jaw moving as his words meet the open air. I bring my camera up to my face, peering through and snapping one shot. One for myself.

One of him.

Kimi turns his head when I take the photo, the confused look on his face changing, the corner of his lip quirking upwards.

He excuses himself, walking over to me while slipping his hands into his pockets, “Antonelli.” I nod.

“Bella.” He says it as if it’s any other word, yet the weight of it hangs above me like a knife.

He’s called me ‘Bella’ ever since I caught him talking to his friend in italian two years ago. He was explaining who was in the group photo we took at Prema and he said, “The pretty one to the left is Y/n.”

In the moment, my heart did a funny flip, but I played it off and am now stuck with him calling me ‘Pretty’ in his favorite romantic language.

“Saw your face when Lewis radioed.” I fake a frown, “Don't want the car anymore?”

He stays calm and collected, his accent hitting me once again, “It’s like you don’t want to see me every weekend next year.” He frowns, “I know you better than that.”

I cross my arms, looking up at him, “Do you?”

“If I wasn’t there, who would you bully?”

A small smile breaks my cool exterior, “True. My brother isn’t as easy as you.”

He bites his lip, shaking his head, “Ollie is a project for both of us to bug.”

⋆༺

I’m in the Ferrari garage for the majority of the day, practice going smoothly and my day getting increasingly boring.

I end up walking over to Ollie as he gets out of his car, “My speedy brother!” I smile as he pulls his helmet off, the same grin he has everytime he gets out of a car.

“My snappy sister.” He greets me as I raise a brow. “Oh! Later today I'm going over to Kimi’s room so I can’t get dinner with you…” I frown, “Sorry! Guys night. Jack too.”

I cross my arms, “How are the three of you already pissing me off and your season hasn’t started yet?” Ollie just laughs and shrugs, leaving me in the pitlane.

I continue my walk, taking some more photos even though I'm technically supposed to focus on Ferrari pics. I see Kimi in the Mercedes garage, talking animatedly with Lewis.

I pull myself away because too many times I’ve gotten caught looking at him.

I continue my walk to see Jack Doohan standing alone, “Jack!” I smile as I approach him.

He grins a toothy smile, “Y/n! Long time no see!”

“Shit, yeah! How’ve you been?”

“Great! This weather is worrying me though.” I look up to the blue skies, frowning, “I have a feeling.” Jack and his ‘feelings’ are well known in the paddock.

“Well, if it does rain i’m calling for a singing in the rain moment!”

“I’m thinking more of Tom Holland and an umbrella.” I let out a loud laugh, reaching out to touch his arm.

“I’m so in! I can definitely find a black wig and leather.” He shakes his head, his gaze flicking past me.

I turn instinctively. Kimi is looking at us, his face blank but soon turns into a soft smile and a wave. Jack waves back but Kimi doesn’t look at me, just walks back into the garage.

I make a face, turning back to Jack, “Weird.” He laughs out loud, staring down at me, “What?”

Jack just shakes his head, “I’ll see you later, Y/n.”

⋆༺

KIMI

The guys somehow found three old gaming controllers and hooked them up to the TV. Ollie and Jack are screaming at each other as I grab the ice bucket, “Hey! Grab me a candy bar?”

“Oh! And some crisps!” Jack cuts in. Rolling my eyes, I grab some cash and slip out the door.

As I walk down the hallway, I’m humming a stupid one direction song that Ollie got stuck in my head. The hotel is nice and I pause when I walk past the window.

Brazil stares back at me, the darkness isolating the few lights that are still on. I pull myself away from the view and continue humming and walking to the ice machine.

I stop my noise as soon as I turn the corner, seeing a girl standing with her back facing me, and her foot repeatedly hitting the vending machine.

She’s in pink low waisted flared sweats, and what looks like a formerly oversized shirt, cut into a crop and off the shoulder top.

“Fuck!” She yells again, this time placing her hands on the machine.

“Y/n?” I don’t mean to scare her, but she jumps. “Sorry. You need help?”

She looks hopelessly between me and the machine, crossing her arms over her bare skin, “Yes. This stupid thing ate my money!”

I can’t help but smile at her anger, her face is red and her hair looks like she’s shoved her hands through it a million times.

I quietly nod, peering into the box and seeing the stuck candy. I put my money in, buying a packet of strawberry cookies that do exactly what I hoped.

When the pack falls, it knocks her candy right out. “My savior.” She jokes before bending down and reaching into it. My gaze flicks down to her ass, the curve of her waist and her skin on display.

When she stands, I finally see her candy. It’s a chocolate bar with some sort of nuts and she looks ecstatic to finally have it in her grasp.

“Thank you!” She hands over my cookies that I hope Ollie will eat, “How’s the boys night going? They put you on errand duties?” She laughs a bit, a sound I wish I could bottle.

I scratch the back of my neck, “Yeah… What are you up to tonight?”

She shrugs, “Movies, going through pictures, snacks, crying. The usual?”

I let out a breathy laugh, “Why are you crying?”

“I miss my cat.”

“Mmm, peppermint.” I swear she almost starts crying right there. But she takes a breath, “You alone?”

It’s like a switch flips and she’s suddenly looking up at me like I'm more than some kid from karting. She bats her eyelashes, “I don’t have to be. Ditch the guys, I'm watching the princess bride.” I frown, I do love that movie.

“As appealing as that sounds… I think your brother would have an issue with that.” Her lips quirk into a slow smirk. God I love her lips.

“Tell them you got lost. Or kidnapped!” she steps a bit closer, “You really gonna turn down my invite?”

Fuck. Actually fuck. Fuck Ollie for having such a hot sister and fuck her for being so damn convincing. “You’re making it really hard for me.”

She doesn’t miss a fucking beat, raising a brow innocently, “Making more than one thing hard?”

I bite my lip, shaking my head, “You’re funny.”

She doesn’t break eye contact, “I aim to please.”

“You’re gonna get me in trouble, Bella.” I see her flirty facade break when I call her that. She likes it and I like that I can make her blush like that.

She flips her hair over her shoulder, “There’s this thing called self control.

I run my tongue over my teeth, “Trust me. I know a thing or two about it.” She looks satisfied at my answer, “Is this gonna come back to haunt me?”

She blinks innocently, backing up, “I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

I groan, watching her sinister smirk as she leaves, “Bearman…”

She mocks me, laughing, “Antonelli.” I want her to say my name a million times in a million different ways.

I nod slowly, “Have fun crying!”

“Have fun thinking about me!” She blows a kiss before disappearing around the corner. I want to chase after her and keep our conversation going forever.

Instead, I buy a bag of crisps and a chocolate bar. Walking back to my room, all I can wonder is why the universe continues to test me with my best friend's bloody sister.

⋆༺

YOU

I bounce around the paddock, RAYE in my headphones and my camera in hand. The sprint is over and after some dramatics, the rain started.

I texted Jack as soon as I saw the dark cloud, letting him know he’d be good as a prophet.

I run into Franco, he looks tired but happy to see me, “Fran!” He hasn’t been here for long, but his first day was when we met and hit it off instantly. He’s like another brother to me.

“I’m hiding from the media.” He whispers, “Anything interesting happen to you recently?” My mind immediately goes to Kimi and last night. Something about him just makes me need to mess with him.

But maybe it’s not all for fun, maybe it’s a bit of truth mixed with flirting.

“Uh oh…” Franco points at me, “You've got that look in your eye.”

I scoff, playing it off, “What look?”

“That look like something interesting did happen to you. Spill!” I’m about to say something but a figure appears next to us, clapping his hand with Franco and smiling at me.

“Norris!” I thank god for the distraction.

“What’s up?” He’s in all papaya orange, a water bottle in hand.

Franco smirks, “Y/n here was just about to tell me about her interesting life!” He crosses his arms, “Go ahead.”

“Oh?” Lando turns to me as well, standing next to Franco. I suddenly feel very ganged up on.

“I’m not telling you two anything! You’re both too nosy.”

“Can’t help but be curious. Especially about you.” Franco’s relaxed manner makes my lips crack, smiling a bit. “So tell us, who’s the boy?”

“You’re not my brother- you don’t get to ask that.”

“You tell Ollie about your boy troubles?” Lando asks.

“He’s my twin, it’s in the rule book. At least everything he won’t gag at.”

Lando laughs at this, his eyes tracking past me and I know instantly as him and Franco smile, “Kid!” Lando waves him over just as Franco catches the look on my face.

His mouth drops but I just run my tongue over my teeth, holding back my smile with my hands on my hips.

Kimi is next to me in seconds, coolly looking at me as if he wasn’t an inch away from me yesterday. “Hey.”

“So what are your intentions?” Franco comes in hot and embarrassing, my eyes widening at him.

Kimi looks confused and a little intimidated, “With…?”

I stare Franco down, my eyes wide and panicked, Lando finally understanding and breaking out into laughter.

“Next year. You gonna be okay with your friend on the grid? I mean we all saw what happened with Lewis.”

Kimi looks at me as if i’m going to be any help, “I think i’ll be okay… Y/n will probably give me more issues than Ol.”

I scoff, “Right. You’re so cocky with Merc. Do you need a reminded how Lewis is driving that car this weekend?” I tick and wave my finger, “Ollie was totally geeking out when he overtook him.”

He laughs as Lando smiles, “I say we get Y/n a car and see how she likes it.”

Kimi shakes his head, “Don't say that! She’ll go bowling and still win.”

I smile widely, “I was a menace in karting. Kimi has never had the pleasure of racing against me.”

“You’re the one getting cocky, Bella. You really think you can beat me?” I nod, knowing full well I would not beat him.

Lando and Franco both look at us quizzically, “Bella?” Franco speaks italian. Something Kimi clearly did not know.

Lando frowns, “Bella? Is that your middle name or something.” Kimi looks like a deer in headlights.

“More like a nickname.” I mumble.

Franco eyes me, “And you know what it means?”

Lando is still confused, “What does it mean!?”

We all ignore him, “Mhm.” I say as Kimi fiddles with his ring, “Anyways- I gotta go!”

⋆༺

I ignore Kimi for the rest of the day. In my mind, i’m blaming it on work as if the rain hasn’t stopped my job.

Well, I still sit in the garage and snap pictures of the same things over and over again. Charles and Carlos are pretty but become boring to look at after two hours of them sitting and staring into space.

“Y/n!” The head media manager comes up to me, “Could you go print out what I just sent you? It’s for a tiktok.” I nod, grateful for a distraction and a reason to get out of the cold.

Walking through the halls, I stare at blank walls and try to find the printer which we share with two other teams.

It’s hidden in a dark corner, the door shut. I walk in, still humming to my music when I face Kimi. I’m reminded of last night and how his humming ceased when he saw me.

He turns around when the door squeaks, “Oh, Hey.”

“They got you running errands again?” I smile, the door shutting behind me.

“You’re one to talk.” He eyes my phone in my hand, the picture pulled up already.

“Fair enough…” I walk closer to him, he’s leaning over the printer, “How long is your stuff going to take?”

“I’m assuming a while because I can’t get it to work.” My eyebrows pull together as I look at the tiny screen, my arm brushing his as I reach over and press some buttons.

I eye his arms, something that keeps acting a magnet for my eyes. Stupid driver workouts.

Kimi checks his watch, groaning, “I gotta be back soon.” I keep messing with it as he crosses his arms.

“I’m not very experienced in printers.” I shrug, turning to him, “Maybe we can borrow Haas’?” He makes a face, “It’s a printer, not a car part.”

When he reaches for the doorknob a sense of sadness washes over me, knowing we’ll be separated again.

But i’m supposed to be avoiding him! I can't make up my mind and it’s making me angry. I don’t want to be with him but I do at the same time and I'm busy and stressed and he’s so damn cute.

He turns it, except it doesn’t turn. His hand slides over it as it stays in place. He looks back at me, already panicked.

Suddenly, i’ve completely forgot about why I want to stay with him. Because all I can focus on is that I’m stuck in a tiny room with Kimi Antonelli and no fucking air.

⋆༺

KIMI

We’ve texted everyone we know, called and banged on the door, yet still… nothing.

I think she’s freaking out because her hand hasn’t left her bracelet. I sit next to her on the floor as she shivers, “I’m going to petition for a bigger warning budget.” I laugh a bit, shrugging off my jacket.

I see her gaze drop to the black bomber, “I don’t know how you’re cold because I'm getting hot.” I push the jacket closer to her and she offers a small smile and pulls it on.

I think she’s going to stay quiet, but she looks up and sighs, “Must be because I'm so hot.”

I laugh, grateful for her humor back, “Glad to know you’re feeling well enough to talk yourself up.” a small smile graces her lips again.

“The day I don’t, call the police.” She crosses her arms, pulling my jacket close to her, “Thanks.”

“No problem, I told you, you look good in mercedes merch.” She’s facing the wall across from us still, her head tilted back as she bites back a smile.

“Do I look good in Mercedes, or is it just because it’s yours?” She tilts her head towards me as a slow smile meets my lips.

“Bit of both?” I look at her. Her eyes locked on mine as they squint a bit, assessing my answer. “Mostly cause it’s mine.”

She shakes her head, looking forward again, her cheeks pink.

“Your flirting game has improved.” she teases again, “Must be all the time around me.” cocky. arrogant. and correct.

“Nah, I think it’s because I actually mean it.” I see her breathing change, her smile fading.

“Too far, Antonelli. Don’t do that.” She whispers.

“Do what?”

She sits up, turning towards me completely, “Giving me false hope.”

I blink, realizing that this is real and happening right now as we’re stuck in a tiny room, “There’s nothing false about it.” when she starts to look away from me, rolling her eyes, I scoff, “You can’t be the one upset about this. You started this!”

“I started this?” she looks shocked but her voice is still calm, “You called me ‘Bella’. You called me Bella and I didn’t even know your last name.”

“Some girls would like that I described her as I see her. And you 100% love it.” She licks her lips as I continue, “Ollie tells both of us to stop constantly. I thought you at least do it to bug him.”

“Kimi. I don’t care what my brother says that much and… If I was doing it because of Ollie- I wouldn’t flirt with you when we’re alone.”

“So you like it. So why did you tell me to stop?” I can’t quite place the look on her face, confusion mixed with… anger?

“I told you… false hope.”

“And I told you. There’s nothing false about it.” She swallows. I can hear myself breathing as she stares at me.

She stares at me as if it's the first time we met. She stares at me like she knows everything about me. She’s confusing and it’s making me so angry because we’re stuck in this fucking room and neither of us will-

I’m so caught up in my own mind that I don’t realize she’s leaning in. I don’t realize until her hand touches my jaw and her lips are on mine.

She pulls back, her eyes wide and her breath quickened. “I- Sorry.” I’m shaking my head and pulling her in before she can talk again.

She tastes like mint and smells like chocolate. My hand slips under the jacket, gripping her waist. I think I'm dreaming and if I am I don’t want to ever be woken up.

“Bella.” I whisper, my breath ragged and her smile pressing against my lips.

And then the door opens.

We pull apart so quickly that when Ollie blinks down at us, he doesn't see us. But he knows.

Y/n’s lips are red and my cheeks match it. We’re both panting and Ollie just blinks.

“Ollie.” Y/n says, her voice breaking the silence.

“No.” Is all he says before turning around and leaving.

⋆༺

YOU

Ollie isn’t pissed.

Ollie is… embarrassed? Uncomfortable? Horrified that he caught his sister and best friend making out?

We had texted him to get us out of that room and obviously I completely forgot because I was FUCKING KISSING KIMI.

I’m still warm and absolutely buzzing, but with the rain delay, I'm on extra photo duty. I edit all through the afternoon and fall asleep before I even think of texting him.

On quali and race day, I wake up way too early to my phone dead, and when I finally make it to the track, I'm working again.

With my phone a tiny bit charged, I text Kimi.

I’m tapping my foot the whole race, cringing at every crash and mentally screaming at every red flag.

I keep checking my phone to see if Kimi has texted me but still nothing. He pops up on the TV when Lewis gets overtaken.

I don’t mean to smile, but I do.

It’s ridiculous. I’m acting like a total school girl! One day, i’m flirting and sizing him up because I thought our game was… well… just a game. Even though I didn’t want it to be. And the next, I'm kissing him and checking my phone like an obsessed freak in love.

I really do like him. And that scares me a whole lot more than I expected.

⋆༺

KIMI

I frown with the team at todays result for Lewis, but I fucking run out of the garage the second the podium starts.

I find her in the midst of chaos, her hair is wet and I can’t help but laugh. She doesn’t see me yet, but she’s making a disgusted face and peeling her hair off her face, “Bella.”

She turns just then, her face morphing into a smile, “Hi.”

“You wanted to talk?” She nods, pulling me into an empty glass room.

“I like you.”

A slow smile pulls at my lips as I lean against the table, “I like you too…”

She sighs, like all she needed was to hear that. “But i’m fucking scared because how does that even work and I always thought you flirted back as a joke and Ollie is so weird about it and I really really like you.”

I take her hand in mine, her eyes settling on me, “The first time I saw you, I told Ollie you were pretty. He then informed me that you were his twin and I wanted to die.” She laughs out loud, “But it’s more than your face, because as pretty as you are, and as much as we flirt… I like you because you’re the smartest eighteen year old I know and the only one who can make me laugh and blush simultaneously.”

Her breath slows, stepping closer so she’s standing in between my legs, “I’m sorry for being a pussy about you.”

I laugh, “I wouldn’t give up your cheesy lines for anything.” my favorite smile stares back at me. The one that I create. I poke her in the side, “You fancy me!” I mock her accent as she rolls her eyes and kisses me.

She’s sweet and perfect and my girl.

[averysmolkirbo]

"Woahhh, am i in the afterlife?-"

"DUDE. WHAT THE HELL MAN. OUT OF ALLL THE MORTALS I COULDVE GIVEN A GIFT TO, I CHOOSE THE ONE GUY WHO NEVER FIGURES IT OUT???"

"Wha- are you like god or something? wait, I HAD A POWER??"

"YEA. I GAVE YOU THE POWER TO FREEZE TIME AT WILL AND YOU NEVER DID IT??? Waste of a perfectly good gift!!"

"HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW. I WAS NEVER TOLD ABOUT THIS?"

"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE THE DAMN BALONEY SANDWICH."

"wha- what does a baloney sandwich have to do with this???"

"I WATCHED YOU FOR LIKE A MONTH. AND YOU ATE A BALONEY SANDWICH FOR LIKE EVERY MEAL. YOU JUST STOPPED ONE DAY AND NEVER DID IT AGAIN. WHAT THE HELL, MAN. YOU HAD LIKE 50 FUCKNGI YEARS TO EAT ONE FUCKIGN SANDWICH AND YOU COUDLNT DO THAT?"

"Wait. Is this about that time i was like, 20??? I swore off of baloney sandwiches forever after i found my girlfriend cheating on me. That was her favorite. i only had it cuz i was with her."

(mortal, under his breath)

"....That bitch really took my virginity and my godly powers??? DAMN IT!"

"AW OF FUCKING COURSE I CHOOSE THE ONE THING YOU NEVER ATE AGAIN. SHIT. "

"ok so i still dont see why i had to eat a baloney sandwich to use the power. why couldnt i just *use* it. why is this MY fault. YOU shouldve just made it easier to use."

"Wow, i give you powers and this is the fucking thanks i get? See if i ever help you again..."

"Ok so like the thing is im not actually powerful enough to give you a gift that powerful no strings attached. I had to choose an activation condition for it to work."

"And you chose BALONEY SANDWICH? not something like BREATHING?"

"I didn't want to make it obvious!! I wanted to have FUN with it but clearly you were too DENSE for it. Baloney sandwich was the most consistent non-obvious thing you did!! how was i supposed to know you were gonna stop the NEXT DAY?"

"Ok. So while this obviously sucks for both of us, can i use it now? In my afterlife?"

"If you can make a baloney sandwich. I dont see why not."

"Ok. Cool. Is there like a godly pantry i can get the ingredients from, or...."

"Yes, actually, down the hall, to the left, 2 doors down."

"Sweet."

"Oh yea i forgot to mention we only have whole wheat bread"

" >:( aw man. I hate whole wheat. It tastes like shit. What else, you're out of baloney?"

"No......"

"why'd you say it like that"

--------

"Ok i found your stupid bread. but where's the baloney. You said you had some."

"We do, but-"

"ok so where is it."

"-but we keep it in the underworld."

"Why??? What do you guys have against baloney??? Why is only IT condemned to the underworld???"

"No reason! I swear! the guy who runs the place just REALLY likes it and none of us really do, so we just let him keep it down there"

"Yknow since he's like. Already stuck working in the basement. we thought we'd give him SOMETHING."

*one very long and perilous journey for baloney later*

"ok YOU COULDVE AT LEAST TOLD ME HOW HARD THAT WAS GONNA BE."

"I told you, man. He REALLY likes baloney."

"Whatever. i ate your stupid sandwich. how do i activate it."

"Try clapping."

*nothing happens*

"What. Why didnt it work. I ate your stupid baloney sandwich."

"Did you remember to add the mayo?"

"MOTHERFUCKER-"

You're a god who has decided to give a mortal a gift. You decided to surprise them by not telling them about their new power. After a full life of normalcy, you greet them in the afterlife confused and angry as to how they didn't discover their power.

[helluvapoison]

Winners and Losers

Adam, Angel Dust and Alastor vs No Nut November

warnings: sexual content, semi-unserious, 18+ only regardless, implied m!reader for angel

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

Adam

Are you kidding!? He doesn’t wanna do that, not even for— oh. No shit? For that? Yeah, ok, he’d try for that! Seeing Adam snap out of his lazy ways is.. rather impressive. (And all it took was a little incentive, can you believe it!? You need to keep that in your back pocket.) Unfortunately, he doesn’t make it the whole month.

“It’s your fault, really,” he’s irritatingly smug for someone fucked stupid, “what else am I supposed to do when you look like that?”

Lasted 14 days, better than you expected

~

Angel Dust

He said he was ‘down for anything once’ but you think he missed the point. He’s brushing against you every chance he gets, placing strategic kisses in spots that make your knees weak, making you drool with the way he— Wait a damn minute! This is Angel we’re talking about, he didn’t miss the point!

“Ya caught me!” He laughs lowly as he climbs into your lap, “I was just testin’ somethin’, baby. Thought I could make this… harder on ya, s’all.”

Lasted 6 agonizing hours. You should’ve seen that coming HA

~

Alastor

He doesn’t know what that is, and he doesn’t want to know.

“I don’t care for games that test my patience... I do love a good hunt, though. Say! I have a game that could put this one to shame.”

Lasted Failed

[papaya-twinks]

Idk if this is something weird to request! But I have diagnosed autism, and struggle with so many things because of it, I was wondering if you could write like a lando x autism gf? Maybe where fans make fun of her? Or something! If you’re not comfortable with writing that I understand!🫶

Warnings: I refuse to put autism as a warning. Anyways, crying, mental breakdown.

Pairing: Lando Norris x fem!reader

A/N - I’d never not be uncomfortable writing about conditions/diseases or anything! ❤️❤️

“Y/N, I’m gonna get to the shops, is there anything you- baby, what’s wrong?” Lando cut himself off, his eyes widening as he walked into the lounge to the sound of your sniffles, your knees pulled to your chest.

“Oh, um, nothing,” you said, wiping your eyes hastily, very nearly poking yourself on the eyes in the process, a fake smile forced onto your face as your boyfriend raised a brow.

“Y/N, give me the phone,” Lando said, his voice half-stern, the authority in his tone making it almost hard to say no. “Lando, I-,” you started, hesitant to hand the device over, especially over what you’d read.

“Y/N Y/L/N, you give me that phone right now,” he said, his voice stern as your shoulder dropped in defeat, handing the phone over begrudgingly. He clucked his tongue, opening it with the password - his birthday.

“Why?” Lando said, his voice calmer and softer now as he sat down beside you, “Baby, why do you do this to yourself, why do you reset this bullshit?” he wrapped an arm round you as your lip quivered again.

“I can’t help it, Lando,” you said, your voice cracking, “people keep making fun of me and I’m trying to seem more normal and-and stuff,” you said, your gaze falling down to the floor, your tears falling.

“I’m trying, okay?! I’m trying to seem like a normal girlfriend and not some person whos weird or a freak!” you almost screamed, quoting what those stupid, stupid people online called you.

“Y/N, Y/N!” Lando yelled, his voice matching, and surpassing yours, as he held your shoulders firmly, snapping you out of your breakdown. “I fucking love you, I don’t give a shit what people say!”.

“I know, but dont you read it? They say I’m a-,” you started again as Lando dug his nails into your shoulder, a hiss on your lips. “Dont you fucking dare! Dont you tell me their stupid bullshit, Y/N,”.

“Im sorry,” you said, your voice cracking, “I just- I struggle doing everyday things and I hate asking for help,” you said, your gaze falling once again as Lando sighed, kissing your forehead.

“Then what am I here for, hm?” he tilted your chin up, “I’m supposed to help you, baby,” he kissed your jaw, trailing his lips up to your cheek, as you sighed.

“I’m sorry,” you apologised again, letting him pull you into a hug, holding you til your sniffles died down, slowly rocking your back and forth. “Now what did you want from the shops?” he asked softly.

“Just some crisps or something,” you mumbled. “Yeah, alright,” he nodded, “but I’m taking this,” he pocketed your phone. “If you want to take it,” you shrugged, “I wanna come with you to the shops,”.

“Of course, baby,”.

[ienjoywritingfilth]

a sinner i am part iv

trope: Boyfriend's Dad PP character: Joel Miller x f reader / Shawn Miller x f reader / Joel Miller x Tess chapter summary: You and Joel find yourselves alone and things finally come to a head.

wanna see the other parts?

please reblog and review and follow me and all that good shit - IEWF

warning: oral (m and then m gets it), p in v sex, cheating on your bf (but it’s cool, cuz its with Joel and everything is fictional in this universe), fantasy cheating, daddy thrown around, cum swallowing, dirteeee talk, alternative universe b/c daddy miller stays alive and hates golf and he has a son named Shawn, no Sarah. rating: E

words 3.8 taglist: @lady-viscera | @cjdign | @fuckthatbazinga | @liciafonseca | @stevie75 | @joelalorian | @oldenoughtoknowbettersstuff | @akah565 | @dontknow446 | @pedritosgfreal | @yesjazzywazzylove-blog | @untamedheart81 | @ashleyfilm | @sptbear | @elegantduckturtle | @auteurdelabre | @noneofmyshipsarereal | @blahkateisdone | @hisandsnakes | @wintersquirrel | @shivkillian | @sheepdogchick3 | @moel-jiller | @cuteanimalmama | @gossipgirl-03 | @cowboymarcs | @tahi2006 | @guelyury | @churchofjoemiller | @r3dheadedwitch | @tutarrads | @galway-girlatwork | @supertoga | @gabymalikk

part iv : a moment alone

My heart tells me this is the best and greatest feeling I have ever had. But my mind knows the difference between wanting what you can’t have and wanting what you shouldn’t want. And I shouldn’t want you. — Cassandra Clare

Joel and you sit awkwardly across from one another that evening after dinner, trying to join in on the laughter from your partners. 

"Tess couldn't stop screaming," Shawn laughs as he shows the table the video he took of Tess in the ATV next to him. 

"You were driving so crazy!" Tess giggles back. She's under Joel's arm, smiling. She's beautiful and flushed from the wine.

"How was your ride today you two?"  

There it is again: That strange energy that seems to exist between you and Joel. You shoot him a look, surprised to see him looking strangely at you as well. 

"It was really beautiful," you say as you bring out your phone from your shorts pocket. "This was the lookout." 

Shawn and Tess bend over to look at the beautiful shots you took this afternoon. You'd been so peaceful at that lookout over the ocean, thankful to be away from Joel and your strong desire for him. 

"Thankfully Joel drove safely," you say forcing a grin at him over their heads. Tess and Shawn laugh as Joel offers a shallow snigger. 

"Despite this Tess still wants to hike that damn volcano tomorrow morning," Shawn says smirking at her over the table. "At fucking sunrise."

"It's supposed to be gorgeous that time of day!" Tess takes another sip of her wine. 

Joel takes a deep gulp of his beer, trying to be present but unable to stop thinking about his daydream earlier. Joel watches his sons arm crook around your neck, pulling you close to him. 

"Well I know my girl here likes to sleep in." 

Shawn's palm grazes your breast as he shifts and Joel watches your nipple pebble in your thin shirt. Joel feels his cock twitch in response and he prays that Tess doesn't notice. 

"I also like to sleep in on vacation," you remind Shawn playfully. Your head rests on his shoulder and you feel fondness at how attentive Shawn is being to you today. 

"Well you're gonna be bored tomorrow then," Shawn teases you, "Cause we're all hiking it."

Joel gives a groan at the idea. He agreed to it because Tess insisted he join them. But he doesn't really want to do it. His back is sore and he’s so fucking pent up because of you. This vacation is turning into a nightmare.

"If we're leaving early we should hit the hay," Shawn says with a yawn. "Meet at the car at five?"

Everyone agrees and you rise with Shawn taking your hand in his. Joel watches you murmur something to his son and Shawn chuckles, nodding. The two of you disappear into your bedroom, the door closing quickly. 

Tess bounces on Joel's cock her pretty breasts jumping with every thrust of his hips upwards. His wide hands keep her from falling over and he grunts with every fall of their bodies. The second they got into the bedroom she pushed him onto the mattress and handed him a condom. 

"Missed this cock," she whispered as she guided the head through her damp folds. 

"Missed this sweet pussy," Joel whispered back. "Missed how she looks when she's full of me." 

Even through the condom Tess feels good. So tight and warm it's only a matter of time before the two of them are groaning into each other's mouths in an attempt to keep quiet. Tess tilts back and begins to ride him earnestly her hips rolling. Joel watches how she slides her pussy up and down his wet dick. 

It's just like the fantasy in the ATV. Only it's not Tess he's seeing, it's you in your flimsy clothes riding him. Your pretty face all scrunched up as you bounce on him. 

"You're so big Joel," you cry for him. "Too big for my tight pussy." 

"Fuuuuuck," Joel groans. 

Tess grins down at her boyfriend watching the hypnotized way he gazes where his cock is swallowed by her cunt. 

"You feel so good," she tells him before she begins to ride him furiously, the bed squeaking. Joel grunts with one hand fisting the pillow behind his head. 

"Fucking take it," he grits out as your tight body continues playing behind his eyes. "Fucking take my cum like a good little whore does." 

Tess, turned on from the dirty talk covers her mouth with her hand and moans into her palm. She doesn't want you and Shawn to hear.  Joel is in a state of bliss with Tess squeezing his cock and your phantom body riding him. He can picture your face squeezed in an expression of pleasure. 

"This is so bad, daddy." 

All of a sudden Joel is sitting up and bouncing Tess furiously in his lap. She cries out in pleasure. 

"Beg daddy to let you come," Joel growls into her ear. "Beg daddy to use your cunt." 

Tess feels her core tightening. Joel has always been good in bed but this feels different almost like he's desperate for her. 

"Please daddy," she whimpers. 

"Please daddy what?" Joel groans back. 

"Please cum in me," Tess says as the orgasm starts in her lower belly. "Use my cunt."

Joel falls back on the bed, his forehead slick with sweat and his hips jutting up brutally. Tess rides him, body twitching as her orgasm nears. 

"Show me how a good girl cums for her daddy," Joel rasps.

Tess grips the headboard of the bed and begins to drop down onto his cock over and over until she lets out a muffled whine. Joel lets out a choked moan and spurts into the condom. 

When Joel returns from tossing the condom in the bathroom trash Tess is already in her nightdress smiling at him. He crawls into bed next to her and pulls her into a hug. 

Tess smiles at him with a glint in her light eyes. 

"Daddy huh?"

Joel feels his cheeks going red. He tries to shrug it off casually, unable to look her in the face. 

"Just wanted to try something new."

The truth is Joel has never used that nickname in the bedroom. He never understood why men wanted to hear it. But for some reason when he pictures you, he wants you to moan it for him. He wants that taboo edge that comes along with it, that desperate notion that it's wrong on so many levels that makes him think of you naked and blissed-out underneath him while he fucks his girlfriend.  

"I liked it," Tess says as she snuggles closer to him. He feels a pang of guilt at what just happened and he kisses her sweetly in remorse. He can’t look at her anymore so Joel flicks of the lamp next to the bed and leaves the room dark.

"I've missed you," Tess says breathlessly next to him. "We've both been so busy at work." 

"I know," he sighs tracing little circles along the side of her ribcage. "Gotta get better at that work life balance shit." 

Tess laughs, pulling his face to hers for a kiss before announcing that she's exhausted and going to sleep. Joel lays awake as he hears his girlfriend drift off to sleep. Her snores begin but another sound soon has his attention. 

You kneel between Shawn's spread legs on the bed with your mouth wrapped around his cock. Your hands are on either side of his thighs and your ass is in the air. You moan around his length trying to sound enthused but in truth all you want to do is go to bed. However you feel so guilty over the dirty thoughts you've been having about his dad that you felt you needed to do this. He lies back on the crisp white bedding with his hips jerking up as he passively lets you suck and taste. 

"Your mouth is so good," Shawn grunts as you go down on him. 

You breathe through your nose, frustrated that you've been at it so long because your jaw is starting to hurt. You need to think of something to keep you going. Your eyes fall shut and even though you don't want to you begin to think of Joel. How thick his cock looked through his shorts and how much bigger he is than Shawn. Shawn groans appreciatively as your tongue flicks the underside of his cock. In your head its Joel your leaning between the legs of. Joel's cock hitting the back of your throat. You groan again but this time with sincerity at the thought. 

"I'm gonna cum," Shawn tells you with a whimper. Your eyes pop open and go up his body to see his eyes squeezed shut. You begin to suck harder just wanting this to be over. 

He grips the pillow behind his head as he erupts in your mouth sending hot seed coating your tongue. 

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck!" 

You hate swallowing cum. It's always grossed you out and tonight is no exception. You throw your legs off the side of the bed and rush into the bathroom. 

Joel hears the sound of the adjoining bathroom door swinging open and of bare feet slapping over the tile floor. He rolls onto his side and looks at the crack under his door to see the individual hasn't turned on the light. There's the unmistakable sound of spitting into the sink then water running.

The figure begins rinsing it's mouth and then he hears them spit into the sink again. After a pause there is a gentle sigh and Joel knows that it's you in there. His tummy tightens. He realizes what's just occurred. You spit again and then the door on your side creaks shut. 

You didn't swallow his cum. 

Joel can't understand why that turns him on so much. All he knows is despite cumming moments earlier he still goes to sleep with his cock so hard it throbs. 

Shawn rises early the next morning to the soft chime of a text. He looks at it then at you and sighs before sending something off in reply. He feels tense as he dresses for the day, sure to wear his best hiking shoes. He looks at you again and sees the drool at the corner of your mouth. 

"Gonna head for a hike to that volcano," Shawn whispers, pressing a ginger kiss to your temple. "Be back in a few hours."

"Mmmmhmmmm okay babe,"' you mutter drowsy with your eyes closed. You're barely awake, still warm and half slumbering. 

You don't know how much time has passed before you wake up again to the empty house. You stretch, groaning as your back pops. You yawn, heading into the bathroom, surprised to see it's foggy. You're eyes are closed as you walk to the sink, squeezing toothpaste onto the brush and staring to scrub. You don't even hear the shower running until it suddenly turns off. 

"Hey." 

Your eyes fly open to look at the mirror in front of you. Joel stands in the glass shower with his brown eyes wide. He's naked and wet from the shower. 

"Fuck!"You drop the brush in the sink and go stumbling back groping for the door. "Shit I'm sorry-" you sputter with a loud thunk of your heart. You feel like your whole body is shaking. 

"its fine," Joel says in a strained voice. You're thankful his lower half shielded by the shower etching. "Don't worry, it's fine!"

Your hand flies over your eyes as you finally push back against the door, trying in vain to locate the door handle. You hear the creak of the shower door. 

"I didn't know," you shriek, "I thought everyone was hiking!"

You hear shuffling and you assume Joel must be wrapping the towel around him as he steps out of the shower. 

"Honey its fine."

You feel thick fingers coming to wrap around your wrist, tugging it down. Your eyes are exposed, wide and stuck on Joel. His hair is pushed back from the water and he glistens with droplets. 

"It's not a big deal it was an accident.”  

"It feels like a big deal." Your eyes begin trailing down his strong stomach to look at the pristine white hotel towel wrapped around his waist. 

"Why?" 

The moment is charged now, the two of your breathing increasingly quicker. Your eyes trail back up his body, taking their time along his naked chest before they finally glue to Joel's parted lips. 

"You know why Joel." 

His dark eyes grow darker. You can see the way that the pupil edges out all remaining chocolate brown leaving him with an aroused look that makes your pussy clench.

You feel like you're in a dream when his hand goes to where his towel is tucked at his hip. You don't try to stop him when he tugs it loose and let's it slip to the tilted floor. He stands boldly, not a shred of insecurity in his tall frame. 

His cock is thick and large with a slight curve. The colour matches the rest of him but the tip is a blush of mauve. He's half hard but the longer you stare at it between you it hardens further, coming to graze your belly in its ascent. 

You lick your lips subconsciously recalling the desperation you had for just a taste of his cock. Joel sees this and feels arousal nudging the base of his spine. Again you lift your eyes to his, uncertain of what Joel is thinking. 

Joel can't stop looking at you all soft and sleepy. Your tank is practically see-through and the short panties you wear underneath cut you perfectly to show your ass. He's sure that his need for you is seeping out his pores at this point.  

You're halfway onto the cool floor before you realize what you're doing. When your bare knees make contact with the tile you seem to come back into your body. Joel's cock juts directly in front of your face, his head tilted to look down at you. 

Tess is gone on a hike. She left him with a kiss to his sleepy mouth and a quick love you. That's what he should be thinking of. Not his son's girlfriend on her knees, her plump lips inches from the head of his cock. 

But all of that seems so far away right now. His heartbeat is pounding out of his chest because you look so seductive with your hair falling into your eyes and your mouth glossy from anxiously licking your lips. You wait there on your knees, your hot breath fanning over the head of his cock and Joel feels himself get desperate. Joel's hand comes to lace its fingers through your hair, the thick digits cupping the back of your skull. He tugs gently at the roots and you shudder an exhale in pleasure. You feel his hand cupping your skull gingerly urging your face forward. 

"They won't be back for a bit." He says in a husky murmur without tearing his eyes from yours. 

His hips roll incrementally and his thick cock bobs up and down. It’s so big that you have to drag a shaky hand to it and wrap your fingers around the base. Your fingertips can't even touch when you circle him.

Joel groans when you touch him, a low, rumble that makes your pussy tingle. You drop your hand nervously. Joel stares down at you, the both of you clearly waiting for the other to make the first move. 

You gaze up at him in supplication before you tilt your head back and let your tongue slide out. Joel takes a deep sharp breath at the sight of your mouth open luridly and your tongue begging for his cock. 

Joel grips his cock by the base while transfixed by your mouth. You sit patiently as he shuffles forward and he taps the head of his cock against your wet tongue several times. He enjoys the damp slapping sound. And so do you if your squirming is any indication. 

He begins to guide the head of his cock along your tongue in slow stripes. Back and forth, rocking it closer and closer to your open mouth. 

I'm a bad man. 

You begin to suckle the tip of him, intimidated at his girth. You're rewarded with a deep growl from Joel and his fingers tightening in your hair. The sound makes you excited as well as nervous. What if Tess and Shawn come back early? There are so many opportunities to be caught. That shouldn't make your pussy ache but it does. Joel sees your hesitation and loosens the fist in your hair. He doesn't want you feeling forced to do this but he also thinks he might die if you don't wrap your mouth around his cock soon. 

"It's just the two of us here." His words are slow and low and soothing and his eyes are black and glossy with desire. 

You feel lulled into moving forward once more and now you begin to lick the tip of him without looking away. His thighs shake as he watches and feels you. You're so desperate for him and you begin to take him into your mouth. 

I'm a bad man. This is wrong and immoral and disgusting and Joel had never been so hard in his life. 

"It's okay," Joel soothes like you're a feral animal he's trying to tame. "Just relax." 

His hand sweeps back your hair from your face. He wants to watch every moment of you blowing him. 

"You want it don't you?"  Joel coos, his hip slowly edging forward when you make no move. "I know you want it, honey. You want this so bad," he mutters and he's not sure if it's for him or you. "Just open up a little and I can give it to you.”

You nod up at him with luminous eyes. He wonders if there's still a part of you that feels guilty. Your mouth parts as you begin to take him, your cheeks bulging as his cock begins to fill your mouth.

"Uh huh just like that," Joel tells you warmly. "Just like that yea just like that honey." 

Your palms balance on his naked thighs, warm and damp from the shower. Then all of a sudden you pull yourself off of him, saliva clinging from your lips to the head of his cock.

"Wait Joel maybe we shouldn't."

This is so wrong. Shawn is your boyfriend you love him. What the fuck are you doing in here sucking his father’s cock?  

"Shhh," Joel offers in a sibilant hush. "It's okay honey. You're feeling guilty I know, but I know how much you want this. You do, don’t you? It’s okay you can tell me.”

You squirm on the ground at the way he’s speaking to you. All soft and charming like his wet cock isn’t brushing impatiently against your lips. Everything in you is commanding that you stop this immediately but a sinister voice in the back urges you to continue.

“We’ll just do it once,” he promises in a voice of velvet. “Just once.”

You gaze up the length of Joel’s naked body, taking in the strong shoulders, the lean neck and the plush mouth that smirks down at you right now. He takes his cock by the base and and drags the head along your lower lip, tapping it there like he’s knocking at the front door waiting to be let in.

“You want my cock baby girl?”

You exhale, surrendering.

“Yea, I want it.”

“Show me.”

You hate yourself for exhaling before licking the tip of him and whining when you watch his cock drool pre-cum. But you don’t hate yourself enough to stop taking him into your mouth. You whine around him, the guilt and the desire mixing up inside of you.

“I know,” Joel coos as if he feels your turmoil. "It's okay to want this."

You hum around his cock and he smirks at your cock-drunk expression. He begins to slide his cock deeper into your mouth and smiles contentedly to himself when he sees how your mouth strains around him.

“Wider.”

He groans down at you as you work your mouth over him, obeying his order. You want to pleasure him and show him how good you are. You want him to make those low growls again. He begins to shift, his hand holding your head in place as he thrusts into your mouth. You gag slightly but Joel doesn't notice. His head is thrown back and he moves like a wild animal. 

It's only your mouth and you feel like heaven. He can only imagine how your cunt would feel. He needs to feel it, taste it, smell it. He needs to taste every part of your body. He needs you to call him daddy in a whine as he fucks into your beautiful body. 

I'm a bad man. 

He's close now, his balls tightening. He doesn't know why but he thinks of you spitting into the sink. About how his son's cum wasn't worthy enough for you but Joel's is. His hands move to your cheeks, caressing them as he continues to thrust. 

"You'll swallow mine, won't you, baby girl?" 

Yes, you will. You want to feel him down your throat you want to savor any part of him he'll share with you. 

He grunts in approval when you nod and, his hips start slapping against your face. He’s gonna come and he’s gonna make sure that you don’t waste a bit of him. His hand goes to the top of your head, holding you in place again. You've taken his cock so deep your nose is smashed in the thatch of hair around his cock. 

You're gonna swallow his cum. You want to do it. You wouldn't swallow for his son but you'll swallow for him. Joel feels dizzy with elation and deplorable need as his body tightens. He holds your head as ropes of cum shoot down your throat. It's so much that your cheeks plump and he lets out a strangled moan. 

He holds you and waits, watching as your delicate throat bobs, swallowing him down before you beam up at him. He doesn't have to say anything. You simply hold out your tongue to show him it's clean. He gives a wobbly smile and nods in approval with his blushing chest heaving.

You go to say something when the sound of your cell chirping in the other room drains the blood from your face. What did you just do? You've crossed the line. You sucked the cock of your boyfriend's dad. You swallowed his cum. He tapped his cock on your tongue. He fucked your mouth and you loved every second. Your face goes beet red and prickles in the heat of shame. Joel seems to be feeling the same because he helps you to your feet looking concerned as he re-wraps the towel around his waist breathing in and out quickly. 

"Better answer that. Might be Shawn." 

“Yea." 

Joel twists away and walks to his bedroom. His eyes fall shut and he grimaces as he closes the door behind him with a click of the lock. He hears you chatting on the phone to his son and catches his reflection in the bedroom mirror. His face morphs from that of a disgusted father to that of a depraved man.

I'm a bad man and it feels so good.

[nocasdatsgay]

A Lesson in Heartbreak

2 of 3: Words are Painful Weapons

Rating: T | Word Count: 3983 | Pairing: Azris/Reader

Summary: Eris and Azriel made promises they didn’t keep. When you confront them about it, Eris says some things he instantly regrets. Now him and Azriel have to fix what they broke.

Neapolitan Bonds Masterlist| Read on A03| Part 1| Read Below

Warnings: Angst, Eris has a sharp tongue, alcohol, drunk!Eris

A/N: HI so… yeah… I am alive. Sorry this took so long. A second shout out to @daycourtofficial for inspiration with Azriel and his comments when he comes back.

Tagging: @myromanempiree @pit-and-the-pen @lilah-asteria @thisblogisaboutabook @hieragalbatorixdottir @mybestfriendmademe @paleidiot @div94 (if you are tagged by accident or want to be tagged in the future, let me know)

“There. A letter to Tarquin and a letter to her.” Eris sent them with a flick of his wrist. 

Azriel calmed enough to sit while Eris penned the letters. They needed you to come home so they could talk with you in person. Deep down, Eris was thoroughly embarrassed over the whole situation. Not only at himself but for you leaving to another court. He wondered if this was how Tamlin felt all those years ago, when Feyre ran off to the Night Court. Eris suddenly had empathy for him in retrospect. 

He slumped back in his chair and sighed. He needed a stiff drink. But he wanted to be sober if you came home. Azriel sat across from him, arms  crossed against his chest and brows furrowed like he did when he was deep in thought. His eyes were still rimmed in red from earlier. The Shadows were nowhere in sight. 

“What?” Eris looked at his mate. 

Az cut his eyes to Eris, still frowning. “I want you to tell me exactly what you said to her.”

“I’m surprised your shadows didn’t already tell you.” Eris didn’t hold back his eye roll or his sigh. “I don’t fully remember.” 

Everything was a blur from earlier. When he got like that, he never remembered what he said. 

“Well think fucking harder.” Eris could see Azriel’s fingers dig into his sleeves. 

“She came in screaming at me about missing dinner.” It reminded him too much of his mother. The way she would yell at his father when he was a youngling. Eris tried to focus, to put that aside. “I told her the high lord meeting was more important. We were hosting, and.”

After a moment Az said, “And what, Eris”

He cursed under his breath. “I said she would understand that if she had bothered to help. Since she isn’t helping, she doesn't get to complain that we are busy. She knew what she was getting into when we mated.”

Azriel recoiled where he sat. “How could you say that to her?” 

“It’s the truth, Azriel.” Eris brushed back his hair with his hand. “This is what it’s like to be mated to a High Lord. We have responsibilities. Yes, I was wrong for implying she didn’t want to help because she asked and I told her she didn’t have to. I admit that.” 

Shadows came out as Az replied. “And we made promises we didn’t keep.”

“I know I did. It eats me alive that I broke them but what else am I supposed to do? It’s our first time hosting, I’ve only been High Lord for a decade and a half. She’s worked for multiple courts. She knows these things have to be perfect or others will talk.” 

“That doesn’t mean we can’t take a break to have dinner with her.” Az countered. 

Eris glared at him. “Do not act like you are any better. You weren’t there either.”

He winced. “You’re right. I wasn’t.” Then he glared back. “But maybe I would have been there if you let other people do their job instead of making it our problem.”

“Oh you’re going to blame me?” Eris was on his feet. “By the gods. I’m always your scapegoat because it’s easy to blame me than for you to look in a fucking mirror.”

“Eris.” A warning, as shadows built around him. 

“Am I wrong?” Azriel didn’t answer. Eris and his sharp tongue kept going. “You blamed me for centuries when it came to Mor. To this court. To my father. Let’s just add this to it.” He paused. Before he could stop himself he added. “It wouldn’t even be a fucking issue if it was just us.” 

Eris felt the shock through the bond from Az before he shut him out. Even the shadows recoiled from around Az.

“What are you saying?”

“I don’t have to repeat myself. We work well together,” he gestured between them, “because we know what to expect from each other. She wants so much more than either of us are capable of.”

Shadows shrunk back again. “That’s not true.”

“It is!” Then words spewed from his mouth like viper venom. “I wish Elain never told us. I wish I never let you get your fucking hopes up, looking for a third bond in every fucking fae you brought to our bed. But I love you, so I let you do it.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Azriel was on his own feet, siphons on his hands flashing. “I always got your consent, you said it was fine. You brought your own-”

Eris’s mouth ran away from him again. He didn’t raise his voice; his tone did the work for him. 

“Maybe I lied. I only took other lovers so you wouldn’t feel guilty. I was just trying to make you happy because I was never enough for you. Even the Mother herself knew. She knew I wasn’t enough for you so she sent us her.” 

Az looked like he’d been struck. Guilt and insecurity Eris had buried for decades laid out on full display. At that moment Eris hoped Azriel hurt just as much as he did. The silence between them was heavy and loud. It was finally Azriel who spoke, his own words sharp and stinging. 

“I never asked to be mated to you. You say this is easier for me and you, but it’s only easy for you. What’s easy is loving her. It’s not my fault you’re too fucked up to know that too.” 

Shadows grew thick around him and he winnowed out of the room. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You showered and changed into a soft seafoam colored nightgown, given to you by Samira. She was sitting by a small side table reading when you came back into the bedroom. She set her book down and got up from her seat. 

“Did you tell him, Tarquin?” You asked. 

In your haste to get away, you didn’t think about the implications of your actions. Namely as High Lord’s mate seeking refuge in another court. You liked Tarquin a lot. He was kind and you were so happy when Samira and him hit it off. But he was still a High Lord of another court. Samira didn’t look you in the eyes from where she had sat on the edge of the bed. 

“I only told him what you told me.”

“That’s fine,” you said quickly. You got onto the bed and crawled up beside her. “I understand. If you hadn’t told him, I would have.”

“That said,” she put her hand over yours. “You’re here as my guest. Any correspondence will come directly to me unless there is a threat to the court.” 

You winced and she gave you a sympathetic look. Your mates were both known for their tempers. Azriel was well known for his impulsive behavior. You prayed to the Mother that neither of them acted irrationally. A hard thing to hope knowing you sealed this room the moment you entered. 

“Did you want some tea or do you want to rest for the night?” 

“Tea. I need to talk if you’re willing to listen.”

“Always,” she smiled. 

You grabbed a light robe and moved into the small sitting room. She waited as Samira had tea brought to the room. She fixed you a cup, and then she sat down and took her own in her hands. 

“So what happened?”

You let out a heavy sigh, trying to figure out where to start. 

You explained the best you could. How they both made a promise to go to dinner and neither showed. You explained how distant they’d been for months. You explained how Eris told you that dinner wasn’t as important as whatever he was working on with the upcoming summit. 

“He said I knew what I was getting into when we mated. As if I’m not managing his court while his nose is stuck in itinerary lists.” You added bitterly. 

She winced. “And Azriel? What did he say about all this?” 

“He said he was sorry. He lost track of time. Conveniently he was silent when I asked why his shadows didn’t remind him.” You stared down at the tea in your hand. You could feel your eyes water again. “He hasn’t- he has always been more physically affectionate than Eris. Out in public, at least. But he hasn’t even-“

You stopped yourself, your face burning. Samira didn’t need to know how Az hadn’t even called you by a specific pet name in weeks. Eris even longer. And how was you supposed to explain they even stopped just casually touching you? It was childish, to be upset about something so silly. Yet thinking about it just made you cry again. 

You wiped your eyes. “It just feels as if  they don’t want me anymore.”

“They're your mates, of course they want you.”

“Mates doesn’t always mean love, Samira. They did just fine without me for what? Two decades? Maybe longer. Maybe they miss it just being the two of them.” 

“Now you’re talking nonsense. Stop it,” she gave you a pointed look. 

“What if it’s the truth?” You were so sick of crying. You sniffled and wiped your eyes. “They know each other so well. What do they need me for?” 

They didn’t.

That was your whole issue. They didn’t need you. Eris and Az could practically communicate without words. They moved around each other seamlessly. Eris knew exactly how Az liked his tea. Az knew to move papers closer to the inside of the desk when Eris was on a rant, his hands moving about as he talked. Eris knew when to make the spare room without even asking Azriel if he needed it. You tried to watch, to listen. Five years and you still weren’t in tune with them. 

Samira shuffled in her seat, drawing your attention back to her. 

“Eris wrote a letter to Tarquin. I got it while you were bathing. It wasn’t much, just him requesting to know if you were here and if so, that you get this.” She held up an envelope with his seal on it. “I wrote back that I would handle communication and you’d be staying the night.” 

She laid the letter on the table in front of you. Your chest ached, begging you to open it immediately. You shoved it down. 

Samira added, “I informed him that if you want to stay longer, I can’t make you leave. Tarquin has already agreed to allow you to stay as long as you need.”

“Thank you,” you whispered and stared back down at your tea again. 

“Sleep on it. You can have breakfast with us and decide what you want to do in the morning.”

You nodded. Sleep sounded nice now that the adrenaline of the evening had crashed. You drained the rest of your tea and bid Samira good night. You left the letter on the table. You’d read it in the morning. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Eris poured himself the stiffest drink he’d had in decades. The shame and embarrassment of everything was still burning in his chest. He downed his drink in one swing and poured another. Both his mates were gone. He walked over to his desk where the correspondence with summer sat. Your friend had written back instead of Tarquin. He downed his second drink. 

To make things less complicated, I will be handling correspondence until this is resolved. Unless there is a threat to the court, I will not involve the high lord. I promise I will give her your letter in the morning. She was distraught when she arrived and I’ve just gotten her calmed. She’s currently bathing and I will get her some tea to help her sleep. 

There was a break in the letter and she added. 

She has yet to tell me what happened fully, but as her friend I am warning you both that you two better make this right. I will try to convince her to return in the morning, but she is a grown female. If she requests to stay, Tarquin has already told me she may. 

Eris tossed the letter back onto the desk. He doubted once you found out Az left too that you’d come home. It’s what he deserved. 

He was a fool to think he could do this- have two mates. To think he could be any better than his father. Three years mated to you and he still couldn’t control himself. Couldn’t toe the line between work and leisure. Fifteen mated to Az and he still spewed venom in his direction the moment he was cornered. And Eris finally got a taste of his own medicine when Azriel spewed it right back. 

With a heavy sigh, Eris pulled out more parchment and ink. There would not be a high lord summit- not with all of this happening. He’d draft the letters and send them in the morning. If he could sleep at all, with no one sharing his bed. He went and made a third drink. He opened his bonds and see if you or Az would respond. 

Still shut out. The urge to down that third drink was strong. He needed to be sober in the morning even if he didn’t want to be. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Azriel flew until his emotions settled. Eris’s foul words rung in his ears still. ‘I wish Elain never told us’ he’d said. ‘Even the mother herself knew I wasn’t enough for you so she sent her.’ 

His eyes watered and it wasn’t from the wind in them. There was an ache in his chest- both bonds were shut out. He and Eris fought plenty, before and after they reconciled and the bond snapped. Somehow this was still the worst. He ignored his own words that spewed like venom in response to what Eris had said. 

Azriel was angry and hurt. He left- if he stayed any longer the whole Forest House may have been burned to the ground. He circled the border between Autumn and Winter. He couldn't go back, not tonight. He landed in a clearing, stretching out his wings before tucking them back in. He didn’t want to go to Valeris. He had one other option. His shadows seemed to agree, as they circled him and he winnowed. 

He landed outside the wards of Rosehall. The fae lights shown through the window. 

She is awake. a shadow whispered. 

He thought about turning back. He didn’t want to disturb his mother, to bother her with his problems. Yet his feet carried him forward, the wards rippling around him. He tucked his wings in tight and walked to the door. He didn‘t have to knock; the wards were designed to let only few in and to notify her when someone arrived. He could hear the rush of footsteps inside and braced himself as the door opened. 

“Azriel?” His mother answered the door, a navy shawl you made for her wrapped tight around her shoulders, sides shaped to accommodate her wings. “What has happened?”

”I had a fight with my mates.” He said quickly. “They’re fine; I just- I couldn’t stay.”

His mother brushed back loose hair to tuck it behind her ear. He realized her hair was half braided. She nodded, and stepped aside to let him in. 

“I’m sorry, I can go.”

”Nonsense, come in. I just made tea.”

His shadows swirled past him, one or two weaving around his mother. They always loved her; probably more than him if he was honest. He stepped through the frame and looked around. He had visited two weeks ago and already things had changed. His heart skipped, looking into the sitting room. Feyre had taken to decorating his mother’s house with portraits and paintings. The one above the fireplace was of him and his mother. It was a new one on the wall to the left that wasn’t there two weeks ago that made him stop in his tracks. It was of his mother, himself, you, and Eris. From your mating ceremony, based on the clothing and how close together you all were. 

“The High Lady spoils me,” his mother said from his right. “Says my house is too empty. You should see the garden painting she had mounted in the hall a few days ago. Come.” 

He felt her hand grab his own. He could only grip back loosely. He didn’t realize how cold his fingers had gotten from flying. If she noticed, she didn’t say. She led him to the kitchen where a kettle sat on the stove. He sat at the small table and watched almost numbly while she gathered cups and poured the tea. 

“Zemër, tell me what happened.” 

Az looked down at the cup as she sat it in front of him. He wrapped his hands around it, letting the warmth ease the stiffness in his hands. If he was home, Eris would do it for him. He pushed that thought away. He took a few sips, relishing in how the warmth flowed through his chest. His mother waited patiently across from him, braiding the rest of her hair for bed. 

“I said some things I shouldn’t have.” His shadows nudged him on the shoulder. “I made a promise and didn’t keep it.” She hummed and tied off her hair. His voice cracked a little when he added. “I don’t know if I can fix it.” 

There was a beat of silence and his mother took a sip of her tea. “Why do you think such a thing?” 

“Because she left!” He snapped. His mother flinched and shadows hissed at him for raising his voice. “I’m sorry. She left and he- we’ve been so busy and she asked for one dinner and neither of us went. Then she left. And Eris said things. So I said things back.”  

He hated that hot tears fell down his cheeks. And that his mother was looking at him with pity. She reached over and took his hand, holding it tightly in her own. 

“Words are painful weapons and you are the best warrior in all prythian.” That made Azriel snort and she smiled softly. “This is a fight. Not a war. You haven’t lost yet. They are your mates. You love them. If you haven’t given up your love for them, what makes you think they have so easily given up their love for you?” 

She had him there. He gave her hand a squeeze, a gesture of thanks. Then a shadow swirled up his arm quickly. 

We must go. He furrowed his brows. He walks to our balcony. We must stop him. We must go. Go. 

“Shit.” Azriel winced at himself. He hated cursing in front of his mother. “Mama, I have to go. Thank you. For the tea.” 

She watched him stand, not letting go of his hand. “Be careful, my love.” 

Despite the tugging of the shadows he gave his mother a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll see you in two weeks. I promise.” 

She nodded and he winnowed away. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

At some point, Eris wasn’t sure when; he grabbed the whole bottle instead of pouring himself a glass. He couldn’t sleep. Not alone, with his thoughts and past memories hovering around the edges of the bed. They we’re waiting in the dark to grip him when he was most vulnerable. So instead he drank. Drank to numb the emptiness like he used to in the days before. 

One minute he was in his chambers and the next he was stumbling up stairs. There were several balconies in the forest house but there was only one nearest to the roof. He built it for Azriel. It had no railings, just a place for him to take off when he went flying. Az swore he didn’t need it; but he still used it. In Eris’s mind, Az would use the balcony when he came back home.

Because he had to come home. You both had to come home. Eris didn’t think he could bear it if you didn’t. It took him a moment when he reached the door to focus enough to grab the handle. Gods, he hadn’t been this drunk since his youth. Pushing into the room, it was bare- save the single old couch, rug, and unlit fireplace. His gaze fixated on the double glass doors that led to the balcony. If he could just get out there, he could wait. 

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Eris nearly fell over, balance upended by Az’s voice behind him. He grabbed Eris by his shirt to pull him steady. Shadows that had been absent swirled in his vision, grazing his hair and neck as if checking him over. It took a moment for the world to stop spinning and his focus fixated on the male before him. 

“You came back,” Eris whispered. 

“Of course I did.” Azriel’s nose crinkled at Eris’ breath. “You're drunk.”

“Can’t sleep.” He felt his eyes water. He reached for Azriel’s shoulder but Az held him in place. “I’m sorry. I'm so sorry.” 

“Look at me,” Az’s hands were cold as they cradled Eris’ face, forcing him to look him in the eyes. “I’m sorry too.”

“Your hands are cold.” He muttered, his own reaching up to cover them. He wasn’t sober enough to focus his magic like he wanted to. 

“They are.” Az gave him a soft smile. “I’ll live.” 

Eris frowned. “Why did you come back?” 

To Azriel’s credit, he didn’t seem shocked at the question. 

“I came back because I love you.” And Azriel meant it. 

“But you said-“

“I said it’s not easy.” He paused for a moment. “It’s not easy but I choose you. I will always choose you. Because I love you.”

There was silence between them for a moment. 

“She’s not coming back.” 

Az grimaced. “Eris, it’s late. She’s safe in Summer and probably sleeping. Like we both should be.”

“But I need her here.” Eris could hardly bear it. He needed you back. He needed to apologize. “Can’t we go get her?” 

“So you want to start a war with Summer?” Az’s face was serious but there was a tilt in his voice. 

“You’re laughing at me.” Eris replied solemnly. 

“You’re drunk. It’s hard not to.” He sighed, his wings slumping and shadows buzzing about them. “Let’s go to bed and sleep this off.” 

Eris was silent but seemed to concede. Az guided him out the room and back to their chambers. He would have winnowed if Eris hadn’t been so inebriated. He really didn’t feel like cleaning up vomit. 

“You’re too good to me,” Eris muttered as they made their way down the hall. 

Az tightened his arm around him. “I could argue the same.”  

More silence passed. “Do you think she’ll come back?” 

Azriel didn’t reply. He could only hope. His shadows whispered as much as he helped Eris undress in their chamber and get him to bed. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In Summer, you tossed and turned. The air was too warm even with the cool magical breeze that floated through the open windows. The bed was too small. Too empty. You finally cast a spell on your blanket and pillows, making them colder. How funny you’d gotten used to Autumn's colder climate.

The spell worked too well. You were suddenly too cold, too cold without Eris and Az’s body heat to keep you warm. Tears fell on your pillow. They were probably sleeping fine without you. Your mind went to the letter you left in the other room. You were too afraid to open it. They probably only wanted you home until after the High Lords’ meeting. Or maybe they never wanted you to come back. You pulled the blanket tight around yourself. Whatever the letter said could wait until morning. 

You sighed and tried to go to sleep. 

Part 3

[eff-plays]

Long Taash storyline rant, by an enby

Listen. At first I was honestly not that offended/upset with the Taash enby stuff. And having an enby Rook who was able to help them out was honestly pretty fun. It was definitely the first time any video game engaged directly with nonbinary identity like this, and while it's not really 1-1 with my own experiences, I thought that it was. Fine? Ya know? I thought it was a very novel experience to finally have a fellow enby NPC that you could talk to about being nonbinary. It's never happened in any other game I've played.

But then it just ... kept going. And on one hand I get it, because you don't just decide your nonbinary and that's it -- it's a process. But the way it's handled is absolutely insane to me. First of all, how old is Taash supposed to be? They give off whiny teen vibes, and it's very off-putting. This is the character that's meant to represent me? Why are they written like a child?

Second, why are we using modern terms? The word "nonbinary" IRL exists because it is a rejection of the Western gender binary. It's a specific term that isn't universal, and since no previous game bothers to engage with the gender roles of Thedas to begin with, it's absolutely insane to hear these hyperspecific terms used in this made-up fantasy world. Especially since the Qun already has words and concepts for their gender roles -- why didn't BioWare just base this story on those? Why not try to contextualize this in-universe? There are other nonbinary characters in the game, but they just popped up in this previously unequal and often sexist world and are just vibing. With no explanation. Who's out there doing thedosian gender studies? How are they spreading these revolutionary concepts so far and so quickly that the terminology becomes universal?

Side note on that, why does Taash have a little counselling session with the other two trans people that sounds like something they'd do in sex ed class (in Sweden, anyway)? Why is this happening during a magical apocalypse? Hello? Look at this fucking codex entry and try not to cringe

Like. Who is this for? This doesn't make me feel good as a nonbinary person. This makes me feel like a freak, out-of-place, and like I'm a fucking baby that needs my existence validated by some fucking bitchass video game codex entry preaching at me about how totally valid I am. This doesn't feel like respect, or inclusion -- it feels patronizing. It feels corporate, like we're ticking off boxes. "Look everyone, we're using the appropriate terminology! We're so inclusive!" And you know what? The fucking anti-woke chuds are gonna look at this and think THIS is me. That all I care about is having my terminology and identity carelessly stuffed into places just so I can feel good about who I am.

And before tumblrinas get upset, I'm not saying I don't want rep, or that I'm one of the "good ones" who wants video games to be free of "ideology." I am one of the bad ones. Taash should be nonbinary and I should be able to play a nonbinary Rook and I want both of those things to be explicit and accepted in-game! But I want those in a way that respects me and my intelligence, and the world BioWare has created that I've come to love. Who is preventing BioWare from actually, ya know, unwrapping the sexism and misogyny that they started in Origins? Who's stopping them from actually tackling the gender politics of Thedas? Why don't we ACTUALLY sit down and figure out how a society like the Qun might approach somebody not willing or able to conform to their particular rules? Especially the Qun. Like, they had so much potential for something actually interesting here, and instead it's "mom it's not a phase, respect meeeeee!"

Third, and this is my favorite fucking part, they tie Taash's gender to their background, where the Qun represents conformity and Rivain represents freedom. (Which is an entire can of worms in itself that I won't go into here.) I don't actually mind this? I have some extra special boy insight on this part of the quest, because I am also an immigrant who was born in one country and grew up in another. Being nonbinary and being an immigrant, while separate, have both had a similar effect in my life. It's left me feeling like I don't belong anywhere at times, like I'm something different and strange, and at times like I'm a kaleidoscope of expression and freedom, with unique experiences not everyone has. There is an absolutely valid intersection there that could have been explored and would've been very impactful if done right.

But instead we get this

Hello? Oh my god HELLO?

Why is there a BINARY CHOICE in a story where a character embraces being NONBINARY? Why are we now equating Taash's background and cultural belonging to the demands of their mother? You can reject what your parent is forcing you into without completely rejecting your culture! Am I fucking taking crazy pills right now?

The idea that Taash, upon discovering they're nonbinary, has to now say goodbye to being a Qunari? When they weren't even ever shown to care about the Qun in the first place? WHY IS THIS A CHOICE THAT HAS TO BE MADE? WHY ARE THEY ASKING ME WHETHER THEY SHOULD CONTINUE FOLLOWING THIS CREED THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT? (Side note: why did their mother escape from the Qun only to enforce it herself?)

Like? You can't spend a whole fucking subplot deciding you're neither a man nor a woman, but then equate being nonbinary to being Rivaini, and thinking you need to pick that or being Qunari. I'm sorry? I'm sorry? I'm sorry?

Why is there no third choice? Why is there no "Hey you can be both" or "Hey just pick whatever from either culture you want to keep and throw away what you don't?"

I am going insane. The game sits you down and condescends at you for ages about basic contemporary gender theory, but then tries to inexplicably tie that to Taash's cultural background, but then doesn't bother examining how those cultures treat gender at all, and then finally forces us into a binary choice ... for a character whose entire fucking personality is "nonbinary."

The Qun is a misogynistic society. Rivain is a matriarchal society. (This was true for the previous games, at least.) The way these cultures approach gender is vastly different. But instead of examining how such a person would struggle with their background and how that would tie into their gender identity, it's just "Rivain good" and "Qun bad." Pick one or the other. Conform or rebel. Pick one or the other.

And that's the storyline of the nonbinary character.

The reactionary chuds will hate this and blame nonbinary people for how much this fucking sucks. While I can't claim or enjoy it because it's corporate nonsense and fucking sucks. All this does is show people that when games include enby rep, it's hack shit like this, so why include it if it's gonna suck ass, right? This bad writing will just make your game worse, so don't bother!

So yeah. Cool.

Thanks, BioWare. I hope whatever you were trying to prove was worth it.

[unforth]

Y'all have got to stop virulently hating men. Like, I'm sorry, I fucking hate the patriarchy too, but the patriarchy isn't just men and saying it is just exculpates complicit women. I am the mother of a young boy, and I look at this precious, empathetic 8 year old boy I'm raising and I don't know where online is safe for him. Places like this will say he's evil just for his gender, and other places will say "we'll be your friend if you hate with us," and still others will radicalize him in other ways. Where is he supposed to go? Why are we saying the radicalization is the fault of the kids just trying to find a place to hang?

Like this is seriously getting urgent. You have got to fucking stop conflating the patriarchy and men. 53% percent of white women voted for Trump. Men aren't the problem. White supremacy and Christian patriarchal structures are two examples of patriarchy-reinforcing structures that aren't solely couched in maleness. Men aren't the problem, and pretending they are drives more men into more welcoming extremist spaces and also ignores all the parts of this that are forwarded by people who aren't men.

What I see happening all over is scared, depressed, lonely people looking for someone they're allowed to hate automatically, unquestioningly - someone they're allowed to place all the blame on. Fascism says people of color, non-Christian people, queer people, etc., are the ones they're allowed to hate.

And way too many of yall answer that no, it's leftist to hate men instead. You are doing *the exact same thing they are.*

Fucking knock it off.

The answer is we're not supposed to hate anyone automatically based on their immutable personal characteristics. Hate the specific people who've hurt you. Hate the self-reinforcing systems that let them get away with hurting you. Hate the strangers who prop up those systems. Hate the fascists. Hell knows I hate Donald Trump, but it's not because he's a man, it's because he's a piece of shit.

Hate the pieces of shit, not the gender.

But don't hate men just because they're men. That's unhelpful, stupid, insane, and entirely counterproductive. Fucking. Stop.

[hannahluvsbillie]

the only one

casual part 3.

(but can be read as a one shot)

part one

✫ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ~ you thought billie had moved on, seeing her post like it was nothing, she was fine. maybe it was just casual to her.

★ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 ~ billie eilish x reader

★ 𝐜𝐰! ~ mentions of panic attack, angst, nightmares (?)

ᡣ𐭩 a/n ~ hi! thank you all sm for waiting for part 3!! this one has a little time-skip, i’m thinking maybe 1-2 months since casual part 2. let me know if you like it, hopefully it lived up to your expectations 🥺

it’s been a few months since that last meet up billie and you had. the one where she belittled you and your feelings.

you blocked her the morning after, it wasn’t easy blocking her. someone you fell in love with, but you realized that it was one sided the day she told you it was just causal.

maybe you wanted her to spill her feelings on how she loved you, and didn’t just want you for a quick hook up to relive some steam. but deep down you knew that’d never be the case.

to say you’ve been doing good is a lie, you’ve been.. okay. dating felt pointless as of now, you knew your heart would always belong to billie, even if you two weren’t serious, it didn’t mean you loved her any less.

billie on the other hand, looked like she was doing great. i mean- it wasn’t like you’ve checked up on her, you were non contact. but on her instagram she looked like she was doing great. she’s on tour, her album is still doing good, she has good friends. it was bittersweet to see her now, it still made you cry some nights.

you were laying in your bed, staring up at the ceiling. you had just woke up from your sleep, a dream waking you up. the dream was a recurring one you’ve gotten for the past few months since you ended it with billie.

the dream went something like this: you were in bed and when you turned over, you see billie, sleeping peacefully. you just observe her for however long until your brain wakes you up.

it never went father then that, it was just a constant reminder of her. maybe that’s why you couldn’t get over her.

suddenly your phone starts ringing, waking you from your daze. you shake your head a little and roll over, grabbing your phone off of the nightstand and rubbing your eyes to see who’s calling.

who would call you at 3 am?

you read the number, you don’t recognize it. it’s your area code, but that’s all you recognize. god- they’ve called you 12 times.

you just decide to pick up, hoping they’d stop after that.

“hel-“ you clear your throat, trying to make it sound like you weren’t just asleep. “hello?” you say weakly.

“y/n?” the other person says.

your heart drops, how could you not recognize that voice? the voice that used to sing praises to you, who used to speak to you in the softest voice, the voice you fell in love with.

“billie? what the fuck?” you say, blinking repeatedly. you blocked her, how was she calling you? you pinch yourself once to make sure you aren’t still dreaming, only to be met with pain. okay, so this was real.

“i know im sorry- i just- i really need you right now, i have no one else to call and i don’t know what to do.” billie speaks, immediately apologizing. you can already tell she was in the middle of a

panic attack. her voice cracking when she speaks. you feel that same pang in your chest hearing her like that.

you take a deep breath, running a hand through your hair. “okay- bills- billie, calm down. breathe for a minute” you say. you regret answering, it just made everything come back.

you hear her take a breathe and go silent for a moment, before speaking again. “i’m really sorry- i know you blocked me and we aren’t supposed to be talking, but i just- i dont know what to do. you’re the only one that knows how to deal with me when im like- when im like this.” she speaks softly, her voice still shaky.

you go silent for a second, zoning out looking at the floor. inviting her over would be horrible for you, ruining all of the progress you’ve made. but fuck, you can’t just leave her alone, you can’t help but care about her.

“okay- fuck, do you want to come-“

“yeah.”

“okay.”

your eyes widen when she speaks. that was quick. as soon as she says yes you hang up, putting your phone down. what did you just do?

a few minutes later you’re pacing though the kitchen, waiting for the doorbell to ring. the gravity of what you just did sinks in, you shouldn’t of offered.

but as soon as the doorbell rings and you rush over to open the door- maybe a bit too quickly, and you see a disheveled billie, all of it disappears. god you just wanted to protect her from everything.

her hair sticks to her forehead, the same hair that you used to play with, her eyes were red and looked up at you with so

much guilt. it’s obvious she feels horrible

about coming here. maybe she wasn’t as good as it seemed on her instagram. it looks like she’s back in that place she was in when you first met her.

“oh, baby…” you coo, gently putting a hand on her shoulder and leading her inside. when you close the door and look back at her, she looks like a lost puppy, her eyes still swollen.

“i’m- sorry-“ billie chokes out, starting to cry again. you immediately pull her into a hug, gently cradling her head in your hand, the other hand gently rubbing her back.

“it’s okay billie.” you say, gently kissing her head.

you felt so many things, you let her into your house even when she broke your heart, you truely could never deny her, especially when she’s crying in your arms like this.

you’re fucked now.

[dufferpuffer]

Out of every odd Pottermore thing I really like the poop one.

'However, when Hogwarts’ plumbing became more elaborate in the eighteenth century (this was a rare instance of wizards copying Muggles, because hitherto they simply relieved themselves wherever they stood, and vanished the evidence)'

It's so fucking odd and quirky I can't help but love it. What a weird addition nobody asked for... naturally I have headcanons.

Most adults still don't use toilets. They aren't against toilets - it is just more convenient to not have to rush to a separate room. Magic courses through their whole body, including their colon.

Wizarding houses don't typically have a 'toilet' room until they have kids - though it usually takes the form of a hole-in-a-chair sort of thing enchanted to vanish.

Designs of Wizarding 'toilets' are different to the ceramic-bowl-and-plastic-lid of most Muggle toilets, typically more like stools. Easy to shove in a small place. Enchanting a linen closet door to alternate between linen and toilet is common, or just keeping it on a shelf like a potty for the kid.

Toilet use is less embarrassing for magical children in general. They are expected to have more accidents culturally - and their parents vanish on their behalf.

This is because children are awful at controlling their magic. So magical children go through potty training like Muggle children - learning that when they need to go, they go and sit on a toilet.

There is a second 'potty training' that comes later in life when they become good enough at magic. It's not a specific skill they're taught, they just utilize the magic they have learned for it.

It USED to be a specific skill they are taught - because they had to know it before attending Hogwarts. it was many children's first complex form of magic, the struggle to not need your parents to vanish your shit for you before you turned 11.

The first attempts of practicing this skill are daunting. It makes 'shitting your pants' an even more embarrassing accident for magical children - because rather than just a bowel failure, it is also a magical skill failure, a failure of your parents...

Hogwarts put toilets in because it was a genuine quality-of-life improvement Wizarding families were starting to copy - and was familiar to Muggleborns, who had a very difficult adjustment period when attending Hogwarts. Being expected to suddenly be able to control their magic just to not shit themselves... toilets ensured less accidents from those new to magic and those less talented at magic.

Of course, traditionalist families hated this. It was encouraging muggle culture to seep into Wizarding culture when they were SUPPOSED to be separating, it was encouraging families to become lax in their child's magical education, it was lowering the bar of skill for children... for what? To appease a tiny percentage of Muggleborns? 'I made a mess of myself in first year - it is a rite of passage-!'

It became normalized, they were unobtrusive enough that nobody makes a fuss of them anymore - but traditional families still don't engage with them, of course. Parents train their children to vanish their shit - and in the mean-time, vanish it for them.

Am I saying Draco Malfoy spent his childhood literally shitting himself and having his parents clean up after him? YES. Same with the Blacks. Who do yall think vanished their shit first - Sirius or Regulus...? Who had to keep running for Daddy/Mummy/Kreacher because they had an accident? (it was Regulus)

I think James would have had a toilet growing up, his laid-back parents liking oddities like that. Lily would have INSISTED on a toilet, as Muggleborns often do.

The Weasleys have a 'proper' muggle bathroom, with a 1970s toilet that Arthur INSISTED had to flush as if they had plumbing.

Severus grew up in a two-up-two-down, so his toilet was outside and shared with all the neighbours. He doesn't hate toilets or anything, sometimes it was a good excuse to get out of the house and have quiet for a moment, but he was eager to learn how to avoid using it like a proper Wizard. His mother taught him.

Public Wizarding buildings still don't usually have toilets. Parents are expected to vanish their children's messes.

The major exception of this is pubs, taverns and inns. You do not want to rely on drunk Wizards having magical control and the barkeep doesn't want to have to vanish everyone's fluids all night, scourgify the tabletops and seats... Having to use it is a mildly-embarrassing sign of you being too drunk, something the pub might cheer and laugh about.

Hogwarts Toilets flush - when most Wizarding toilets don't bother, being vanishing drop-toilets - as a safety feature. Students try to Vanish all sorts of problems away, to the pipes are enchanted to work out what is being flushed and kick back foreign objects while accepting waste, with significant retrieval systems for... say, a transfigured student that might get flushed. That is more difficult in a smaller space like a small drop toilet.

[farmhandler]

Ahhhh pls do Logan & cable attempting to bond, maybe over Wade??

There was supposed to be more bonding sjhskjhsa it's truly "there was an attempt" here

---

"You smoke?" Logan asked. He didn't know why he did, only that Wade's constant chatter about his latest job with Cable had involved several long monologues about the two of them "getting along".

He and Cable got along just fine.

"No," Cable said. He took the cigar Logan was holding and examined the label. "Expensive habit. Where I'm from, we don't make it a habit."

His tone said, you're all fucking idiots in this timeline.

They didn't not get along.

"Beats drinking myself to sleep," Logan said. "Can't exactly get cancer. But fine, just thought I'd offer. Where's Wade?"

"He told me he was going to find you."

Logan thought about how Wade had told him that exact same thing and shook his head. They were outside the X-Force base of operations, after hours, so he lit up.

"He'll find us when he gets bored of being an asspain," Logan said around his cigar. He pulled out his phone and tapped on it.

where the fuck are you, he texted Wade.

“What have I done to deserve your ire?” Cable said, which was exactly the kind of thing that earned said ire. Fucking prick.

Cable looked at him like he'd heard it. Logan forgot he was one of the telepaths around here that had zero qualms about abusing his powers to get what he wanted.

"You murdered Wade lately?" Logan said evenly. He pulled his cigar away and met Cable's eyes.

“Is that it? I see no point in stating the obvious, but since it seems you forgot, I will. We've both killed Wade. Multiple times.”

"You're awfully fucking comfortable making use of his inability to die." He took another puff and shifted to face Cable. "I read the mission reports shared by the X-Men."

"We make tactical, strategy-based decisions." Cable paused; probably reading Logan's fucking mind again. "No one under my command is thrown into unnecessary danger." He breathed out through his nose. "I don't need to explain myself to you. This is pointless."

"Wade can take it," Logan said. "Doesn't mean he should."

"What can I take?" Wade asked, popping up from seemingly nowhere. His mask was rolled up, and when he walked over, he laid an exaggerated, smeary kiss across Logan's cheek.

Then, probably because he wanted to piss Logan off, he tried to do the same to Cable. Logan was sure Cable would do their usual routine where he shoved him away, but he just sat there while Wade kissed his cheek.

Logan took a very, very long puff of his cigar while it happened.

"Well now it feels like cheating," Wade said, frowning. "You were supposed to stop me."

"I don't see why I should, considering that evidently I don't make any attempts to stop you from doing what you want, whenever you want."

"Of fucking course," Logan muttered.

"This no longer feels like it's about me," Wade said. "Are you two talking about the mission from the other day? I told Cable I could handle it, and I did. Everyone in the building fucking died!"

"Including you," Cable said. He sounded pissed. "I gave you very clear instructions. Orders."

"Which you knew I wouldn't follow," Wade said blithely. "We have an understanding. You try to do things by your annoying little book and I ignore you. It works every time."

Meeting Cable's eyes, Logan felt maybe a little chastened hearing that. Domino walked out calling Wade's name, and Wade skipped towards her.

"Be right back!" he called. "Don't fight over me until I am!"

"I don’t need to read your thoughts to hear how often you assume the worst of me,” Cable said to Logan.

"You're...yeah, you're fucking right," Logan admitted. "Sorry."

Cable looked at him for a while and then sighed.

"I don't make much of an effort either." He crossed his arms and pulled from his pack, of all things, lip balm. "I don't go out of my way to get Wade hurt. But in many ways, his skills are unmatched."

"I know. And I know you care about him. Same way I care about him," Logan said. He thought back to Wade's kiss on his cheek. He chuckled. "Maybe not the same way."

Cable's lips lifted into the closest thing to a smile Logan had possibly ever seen on him.

[yourwhumppromptoftheday]

Hello! My whumper is a demon king named castor, and my whumpee is named Quinn, although they aren’t truly mine so I won’t be doing the whumpee part

1. Acquiring whumpee-oh, it was quite easy. I put a tracker on a rebel and watched them go to their little base. We had a little raid, and I took them.

2. Choosing whumpee-It was clear they were the leader. Everyone panicked when I grabbed them, so I knew they were valuable.

3. Keeping whumpee-I know that they’re strong, and I can use that. I give them freedom but I can’t let them go until they tell me where my son is. I must find him.

4. Legality-Ahahhhaa! I make the laws, I can’t break them. The authorities have no right to stop me. If you’re concerned, however, section 3 paragraph 24 clause eight says that rebels do not have the right to try and stop any punishment. I’m fine

5. Open-ness-Well, I don’t parade them around, but a few of my advisors know that they exist.

6. Quinn has a very comfortable room in the castle, they’ve progressed enough to move out the cell. Even if the room locks on the outside

7. The entire castle is my “workplace” but I don’t bring them to most important decisions.

8. Quinn is quite confusing. They’re a rebel, and a terrible liar.

9. While I certainly don’t think of Quinn that way..their hair is nice. If I were ever going to kill them, I’d scalp them and keep it as a wig.

10. Quinn is mostly obedient, and they’ve come a long way. They used to spit on me and just spout insults all day.

11. I don’t have many rules. Dont leave, dont attack the guards, and dont roam without Alex, me, or a guard.

12. Oh, I bring out the good-ol whip. Always works.

13. I’ve tortured many people before. I won’t say that I’ve tortured Quinn. I’m just conditioning them. With others, I don’t let them rest. I’m being quite nice to Quinn here, they haven’t gotten their limbs removed in weeks!

14. Oh, I’d have to say I love skinning. My healer, Alex, is wonderful at fastly healing someone so I can do it all over again! It’s quite effective.

15. Quinns treats is being able to see their family, having a beautiful room, and being let outside. They’ve behaved enough to deserve these:

16. Possessive? I don’t care. Although I wouldn’t like anyone trying to take them..

17. A few pathetic escape attempts were made when they first got here. You know, darting through doors and sprinting down halls. I just drag them back.

18. Oh, when I got their family involved they certainly broke. They pretended to not care until I brought their little brother up. Oh, how they cried!

19. Their mine now. My soldier. They don’t belong to anyone else.

20. They can move about the castle and very soon, outside, as long as they have a chaperone.

21. Of course I’m doing the right thing! They’re a fucking rebel, what am I supposed to do, give them a cookie? I’ve never felt remorse.

22. I’d have them executed.

23. Alex, my medic, checks up on Quinn often. Healthy as a horse.

24. You have to find out what they care about. What they love. Then you exploit that.

25. I’ve certainly helped them learn that nobody is on their side. Nobody has tried to save them, and I make sure to let them know.

26. My guards are allowed to handle Quinn, and so is Alex. That’s about it.

27. Well, of course I allow them to talk. It helps me get information. Anyone can talk to them.

28. Boundaries are for nerds.

29. I’ve only known of Quinn through rumors before I got them.

30. Quinn gets quite good meals. When they first came here, I did “starve” them, but I never actually do it. I need them in top shape. I only give them the sensation of starving. It wasn’t effective, so I stopped.

31. I use them for information. As the rebel leader, they are also quite effective propaganda.

32. My ownership of Quinn shows the rebels that nobody is safe. That I am coming.

33. I don’t feel anything when I hurt Quinn. I get satisfaction when they tell me what I need to know, and that’s it.

34. Skip!

35. I used to have to restrain them as they got quite violent, but I don’t anymore. Locking them up in a room is enough. They do try and kill themself, but it’s not often enough I have to worry.

36. They’re just..so stubborn. Thats one thing I’ve tried to beat out of them.

37. They wear whatever’s in their wardrobe. I don’t stock it, I don’t know or care.

38. I have nothing to be punished for. I will remain as I am for centuries to come.

39. I believe in me. I am a god.

40. People don’t usually say anything about Quinn. I asked Alex and she said “..Quinn’s nice.” So, vague much?

41. I don’t use a collar. My command is enough to keep them “leashed”

42. No, they aren’t marked. They don’t have to be.

43. Release them? Hell no! They’ll run right back to their rebels with dozens of secrets.

44. Whenever I appear with them, I keep a firm grasp on them. Their propaganda; like I said.

45. I’ve sedated them when I needed to move them or if they need to calm down. I’ve drugged them to have horrible nightmares, because those will become reality if they don’t listen to what I say.

46. I’ve certainly never seen anyone try and rescue them. Or if they did, it was a pathetic enough attempt I never noticed them.

47. I put a roof over their head. I give them clothes, a comfy bed, luxury food, books to read.

48. Hm. I can’t say I remember doing it, but I probably have.

49. Only if it’s important, okay?

50. Haha! You can try but you’ll lose a few fingers

💫Whump ask game!💫

🔸Most suitable for non-BBU pet whump but can be used for whatever

🔸Anyone can use and reblog, nsfwhumpers included :)

🔸We're bringing tumblr ask culture back and ensuring no one is left excluded - sending an ask to the blog y'all reblogged it from is highly encouraged! I'll send an ask too! :)

🔸A little inspired by a wonderful ask post I wasn't able to reblog or visit that person's tumblr. Y'all hear me out. No block can stop me from playing whump ask games.

🔥For Whumper🔥

1) How did you acquire your whumpee? How hard it was?

2) From all the possibilities, why did you pick your whumpee rather than anyone else?

3) Why do you keep your whumpee captive? Why won't you let them go?

4) Is everything you do to your whumpee legal? Do you have to hide it from the authorities?

5) How open are you about keeping your whumpee?

6) Where does your whumpee live?

7) Do you bring your whumpee to your workplace? How about bringing them to your social activities?

8) How would you describe your whumpee?

9) Tell me about your whumpee's prettiest features!

10) How does your whumpee behave around you? How much did it change from the moment of capture?

11) What rules do you have for your whumpee?

12) What do you do if your whumpee misbehaves?

13) Have you ever tortured anyone aside from your whumpee? If so, what's the difference between your torture techniques for your whumpee and for others?

14) Your favorite torture method?

15) Do you give your whumpee any gifts, rewards or treats? If so, what are they? If you don't, why?

16) How possessive you are about your whumpee?

17) Has your whumpee ever tried to run away from you? What would you do/have done in that case?

18) Did you finally break your whumpee? How hard it is/was?

19) Does your whumpee fully belong to you? If not, why?

20) Is your whumpee allowed to move freely? How much?

21) Do you believe you're doing the right thing? Have you ever felt guilty about what you do to your whumpee?

22) What would you do if someone tried to take your whumpee from you?

23) Does your whumpee receive any medical care or health checks? If so, where?

24) Any advice on brainwashing or conditioning?

25) Have you made your whumpee learn something aside from rules and behavior lessons?

26) Do your friends/teammates/coworkers help you to tame your whumpee? Do you allow anyone to handle them?

27) Do you allow anyone else to talk to your whumpee?

28) Do you respect your whumpee's boundaries?

29) Did you know your whumpee before capturing them?

30) How often do you feed your whumpee? Have you ever used food as punishment?

31) What do you use your whumpee for?

32) Does your ownership of whumpee mean anything symbolic for you? Do you make any sort of statement by keeping them?

33) How would you describe the feelings you ger from owning/hurting your whumpee?

34) Have you trained your whumpee to obey your commands? How so?

35) Do you need to restrain your whumpee often? How and why so?

36) What do you dislike about your whumpee?

37) Do you decide on your whumpee's clothes? If so, what do you usually make them wear?

38) Do you ever believe you could be punished for your deeds, whether in your lifetime or after?

39) Could you tell me a bit about your values? How would you describe what you believe in?

40) What do other people usually say about your whumpee?

41) Do you use a collar or a leash on your whumpee? Do they have to wear it everyday, or only on special occasions?

42) Is your whumpee marked as your captive/possession in any way? How so?

43) Have you ever considered returning or releasing your whumpee?

44) Do you ever appear with your whumpee in public? If so, how do you make sure they won't run away?

45) Have you ever drugged or sedated your whumpee? Why?

46) Has anyone ever tried to search for your whumpee or rescue them? How do you prevent them from succeeding?

47) Which aspects of comfort do you allow your whumpee to have, if you do so?

48) Do you ever discipline/torture your whumpee when they didn't do anything wrong? For maintenance, for showing off, just because you felt like it?

49) Would you mind me to see your whumpee? Could you bring or call them to come here?

50) Your whumpee is so pretty! Can i pet them? Please :)

🌼For Whumpee🌼

1) When did you meet your whumper for the first time? How was it like?

2) What were you doing before capture? What could you tell about your life back then?

3) How were you captured?

4) Were you taken specifically for whumper from the start, or there was another reason at first?

5) Have you ever been interrogated? For what reason? Were you tortured there?

6) Do your friends or family know you're here? Do you think they miss you?

7) Have you ever planned your escape? If so, do you think it's gonna work? (We won't tell anyone)

8) How would you describe your whumper?

9) How strict your whumper has been with you?

10) At which points are you most scared of your whumper?

11) What are your thoughts on why is your whumper keeping you there?

12) Which of your whumper's rules you find harder to obey?

13) How much time are you forced to spend by your whumper's side?

14) Do you think anyone would be able to find or rescue you?

15) Have you ever tried asking anyone for help? If so, how did they react?

16) Do you hide from your whumper? Does it help? How long it takes for them to find you?

17) How often do you fight or resist your whumper? How do they react?

18) Does your whumper make you sleep in their bed?

19) Does your whumper take you outside? For walks, for any interesting places, for visiting their friends?

20) Do you have a comfort thing to feel better/safer? Does your whumper know about it?

21) Does your whumper provide you with any things of entertainment to do in your spare time?

22) Does your whumper try to brainwash you?

23) Do you have anyone to talk to aside from your whumper?

24) How often does your whumper punish you? Why?

25) Which punishment method do you hate the most?

26) Do you like it when your whumper holds or touches you? How often would they do that?

27) Has your whumper ever made you wear something you hate?

28) What do you prefer to do to comfort yourself when you've been hurt or feeling sad?

29) Do you remember how long you've been captive?

30) Does your whumper use any pet names for you? What are their favorite? Do you like them as well?

31) How much privacy do you have?

32) Where do you feel safer - with lots of people in the room or with your whumper alone?

33) How do your whumper's friends/coworkers treat you? Do they pay attention to you?

34) Did your whumper ever threaten to hurt your family or friends? Have they actually done that?

35) If you were given an opportunity to escape, what would you do? Where would you run to?

36) What does your whumper usually force you to do? Which of these things do you hate the most?

37) How often do you get sick? Do you get someone to take care of you in that case?

38) Have you ever been afraid to fall asleep? Why so?

39) What does your whumper usually say to you? Does he give more threats or compliments?

40) Does your whumper listen to your pleads, complaints or requests? What would you never ask them for even if you absolutely needed?

41) How does your whumper usually act around his friends or coworkers? Does he try to be a good person for them?

42) How much do you miss your past life, if you do so? Which aspects of it do you miss the most?

43) Are you afraid to die?

44) If you knew you'd end up like that, what would you do differently in your life?

45) Is there anything you said or did that could've led to your capture? If so, do you regret it?

46) If you could become an animal, which one would you choose? Why?

47) How much have you changed since the first day in captivity?

48) Do you have any plans or hopes for the future now?

49) Tell everything you've ever wanted to say to your whumper (we won't tell anyone!)

50) Share one of your happiest moment of freedom for us!