#what makes this even funnier is that I'm german

[onemightygoldfish]

I've been laughing at this for the better part of an hour y'all

[lgbtlunaverse]

Fun little tidbit for the anglophones who find the Dutch language incredibly funny: the Dutch word for concussion is hersenschudding. hersen meaning brain schudding meaning shaking yes we did call it brainshaking yes that is funny. actually concussion comes from the latin concutere meaning to shake why did everyone decide to call this the head shaking injury?

[shadowvalkyrie]

There are a lot of things about Taskmaster that feel very... culturally British. That mixture of extreme silliness with occasionally very dark humour for example.

Or the particular tone of affectionate bullying and the way it's (mostly) taken in good humour. (And expected to be taken in good humour, even when it hits a nerve. Something that caused quite a bit of bad blood between the Brits and the Germans in my former workplace, because we generally don't shrug off insults that easily.)

But I think one difference is sort of... simmering under the surface in ways that aren't immediately obvious to international audiences (and makes me wish I was still writing uni papers, because it would be a GOLDMINE), is how much of the humour is based on the British class system.

I mean, the basic premise of "tyrannical taskmaster makes people jump through arbitrary hoops for his favour and then belittles them for doing so" is already something only an audience with a slightly monarchical bend would accept unquestioningly. Add to that the way the Taskmaster/Assistant relationship is set up... Let's just say it fetishises a social dynamic that doesn't exist in quite the same way elsewhere.

Which I think may partially explain why so many people seem to be oblivious to the D/s undertones. -- Of course it's often kink-blindness on the part of non-kinky people, but I strongly suspect it's helped along by the cultural perception of what constitutes an acceptable power differential acting as a buffer to seeing anything off about it. The threshold for when it becomes weird is different.

Now, I think (and since I'm not British, do correct me if I have it wrong!) a key part of what makes the basic premise funny to British audiences (and differently from how it's funny to international ones) is the way cultural expectations of power vs submission are subverted.

Purely based on accent? Alex is the posh one. By miles. And Greg -- very pointedly! -- doesn't do the matching Fauxbridge that most viewers would probably expect from someone presented in a position of authority (or even just a "neutral" BBC accent). It seems bizarre from a foreign point of view, but I've found that this kind of discrepancy immediately and viscerally registers with Brits. (It's uncanny how little it takes, too -- ask your favourite non-TM-aware English person to just listen to the different ways they say "taskmaster" and they will extrapolate things you cannot even imagine.) Instead of just the regional connotation, there are always implications of class and social status to an accent that are absolutely baffling to the unaware.

Add the fact that Greg Davies is from Wales, and a lot of English people have a weird colonial superiority complex towards Welsh people to this day... It's enough to make all these obvious gestures of devoted subservience from Alex very unexpected and therefore funny.

(Also notice how it adds interesting layers to Katherine Ryan buying Greg a fake lordship title? And makes it funnier in a way she may not even have fully been aware of herself, being Canadian? It's delightfully irreverent and pokes fun at the whole system.)

My guess is that this is also why the studio audience's reaction to linguistics-based jokes is always so strong. Lets take the recurring bit about Alex correcting Greg's grammar. To an international audience, the main joke is that Alex is a nerd and cares too much about grammar, with maybe a side of him being a smartarse towards his boss in a potentially ill-advised way. But to a British audience, the level of audacious insubordination implied there? Much stronger. Wildly offensive thing to do. (And a level of arrogance that is extra hilarious coming from someone shown to be sleeping in a dog bed.)

The same mechanism also puts Alex's snide little asides towards contestants with regional or "urban" accents into perspective. Offensive dick move on his part? Oh yes, extremely. But the audience is very much not supposed to be on his side in this. He's being a bigoted little bully, and either the contestants get to humiliate him in retaliation (it's certainly not a coincidence that the Welsh and Irish contestants are generally the ones having the most fun putting him in his place) or Greg calls him out on it in the studio. In a society in which Alex's brand of micro-aggression is still incredibly commonplace and accent discrimination a widely accepted default, it's actually very cathartic to see it openly acknowledged and condemned.

I mean Tumblr obviously loves Alex, because he's cute and funny and we love the Greg/Alex D/s thing (I'm definitely guilty of this as well), but we have to remember that -- in the context of the show's premise -- his character is supposed to be pathetic and ridiculous, so when Greg does the "next to me a man who once told me while drunk that he thinks regional accents are inversely correlated to intelligence" intro thing, we're meant to see it as an asshole opinion that is actually unacceptable to hold and no one in their right mind would openly admit to. So Greg is humiliating Alex by (supposedly) exposing him as someone who would spout that kind of opinion. (Same as the jokes about Alex's misogyny. I see people criticise these jokes all the time, but I think that's because they refuse to understand how the underlying mechanism actually works and take them at face value as the real Alex's actual opinion, rather than something deliberately assigned to his in-show character to make a point about them being terrible.)

[bookshelfdreams]

So the German dub is out and I would like to offer up to all of you how it deals with the problem of formal/informal form of address because it's really interesting

(Preface: all of this applies how we as modern people use these forms of address. In the actual 18th century, addressing any adult informally was very uncommon, even between close friends. But we're doing a DJenkins approach here)

(@rocketrouquine wrote about how it is handled in the French dub here; also very interesting!)

The thing to understand about formal vs informal you is that it's about politeness, yes - but that's just a very basic understanding. Yes, you are supposed to be formal with people you don't know, but what they don't teach you in highschool foreign language class are all the things choice of address can communicate. Namely, what distance there is between people. About the closeness of a relationship, what level you're interacting on, about signaling how far you will let a person into your life.

The crew of the Revenge all call each other Du (informal) - except for Stede, who everyone calls Sie (formal). Du is for friends and Stede is not their friend, he is the boss. There is a camaraderie and solidarity among the crew that Stede can't partake in. Sie, in this case, is like a barrier that you put up to keep someone from becoming too friendly with you and reminding them what kind of relationship this is (namely, a purely professional one).

This is underlined by the crew obviously and openly thinking Stede is an idiot - and by Stede calling everyone Du. Is it because he sees himself as a social superior who can address people informally but insists on formal address for himself? That's one way to read it! But more interesting and more accurate, in my opinion, is to read this as an attempt by Stede to make himself part of their ingroup. It's especially obvious when Stede invites Olu and Jim to sit with him on the couch in ep1; he's using Du while Olu very poignantly keeps insisting on Sie. It underlines how visibly uncomfortable Olu is sitting there trying to explain to Stede that people choose a life of crime out of necessity, while making Stede seem even more oblivious and out of place.

Interestingly, Stede uses Sie himself to put some professional distance between himself and someone else. Namely, with the tribe elder from ep2, who he addresses formally. Is this a sign of respect? Sure, he has a tendency to go for Sie by default. But it reminds me more of how one would be per Sie with a doctor or therapist; as a reminder that this is a strictly professional relationship. It's easier to be open and vulnerable with someone who you know isn't emotionally invested in your wellbeing, isn't it?

Stede comes from a background where one is expected to address everyone with Sie unless granted permission otherwise. This is a sign of respect, the same way lower class people on this show tend to use Du as sign of solidarity; on Nigel's ship, all the officers call each other Sie. So when Nigel uses Du with Stede, it adds a layer of disrespect, despite it being perfectly acceptable, since they have known each other as children. This is even more evident with Chauncey, who we see interact more with other pirates; when he wants something from someone (Izzy, Spanish Jackie) he calls them Sie, no problem, while Nigel's crew doesn't even make an attempt at showing some respect at the ep1 tea party.

And then there's Izzy. Izzy and Stede call each other every insult under the sun and also address each other formally the whole time, which is the funniest possible choice. Like. I'm not sure why "Sie Arschloch!" is 1000x more bitchy than "Du Arschloch!" but it just is. It's taking this whole game of distance and closeness to a whole new level; I despise you so much I would never entertain the notion of being friendly enough with you to use your first name. Sie Wichser. It's made even funnier by the fact that for Stede, Sie is much more intuitive than for Izzy. It seems like Izzy has to make a lot more of an effort to keep the Sie up, but he's not gonna be the one to break this particular stalemate first, goddammit.

Finally (because that's the really interesting bit, isn't it) Ed. Initially, in ep3, Stede calls Ed Sie, which, of course he would think to do that while he's laying there half dead and bleeding, I love him. Ed echoes this back, because he's determined to "do this right", make a good first impression, and I thought this would be it, they'd be per Sie until the kiss, like it often goes in media translated from English. Fine, I guess.

But then.

When Ed wakes Stede up, he immediately goes for Du. No warm up, no getting to know each other first at all. And it's great! First of all, because Ed of course is the type of person to just call everyone Du, but also because of what happens next: Stede calls him Du back. This is the first time this particular hand has been extended to him, and oh, is he excited to take it.

(Other people call Stede Du first, Spanish Jackie, the chief, but it's not like this; not an invitation)

Stede isn't meeting Blackbeard, he's meeting some guy named Ed. Someone he instantly makes friends with; someone who has already seen him at his worst and so, who he can be himself with. Someone he doesn't need to put up pretenses or worry about proper behaviour with. This scene would have lost so much had they decided to keep up the Sie.

Remember that camaraderie I talked about earlier? Solidarity among the crew that Stede tries but can't manage to share in? Here it is! Here is the guy who will play dress up with him, who will delight in his interests, who will be his friend.

Yes, sometimes an unprompted Du can be disrespectful. But sometimes it is like this: Hey. I see you. Want to be friends?

[avonne-writes]

"it’s quite possible they knew about Buck too" The internet tells me Buck was actually detained at dulag luft in Frankfurt at the same time as Bucky and they were just a few cells away, unaware that the other was being detained and interrogated too. I'm pretty sure Haussmann was trying to play one against the other in some way. And Buck had just arrived at stalag luft III when Bucky got there after him, making the reunion line even funnier ("what took you so long?" dude, you just got there!)

on another note i reaaaally wish we'd gotten to see Buck's interrogations scenes. For reasons. Angsty reasons. Callum's acting in his scene is so good, I wish we'd gotten to see the equivalent from Austin, I don't care if it's redundant.

Yes, I agree! And I knew that, it’s so insane, isn’t it, that they were held so close but they had no idea 😭

I think Buck must have said even less than Bucky. I can imagine him just staring down whoever interrogated him. I can clearly picture the steel resolution on his face, even though his cheek scars are still bleeding and there's sadness in his eyes. His fallen angel look. I think even the Germans could sense that he was a morale boost to his friends and they looked up to him, so they probably tried to break him down.

Side note: do we have a fic where we see Buck interrogated?

[vikinglanguage]

An assortment of more or less ridiculous Danish phrases to incorporate into your day-to-day life! (part the 2nd)

strømpesokker (noun, fk. pl.) – socksocks Or stockingsocks, if you will. It's socks either way.

(hjemme)futter (noun, fk. pl.) – (home)choos I literally had no idea how to translate this, but basically futter (fut in singular) are like slippers or any kind of cozy, comfortable shoes you'd wear indoors. I don't know why we sometimes call them that, but fut is also the sound a train makes. Thus: choos.

blamsefi (noun, fk.) – blasmephy Blasphemy, but wrong because it sounds funnier like this

idyd (interj.) – indeed This is what we in Danish tend to call an undersættelse (see below) of the English indeed. I 'in' and dyd 'virtue', but it kind of sounds like deed. Again, I don't know anyone who uses this except from my immediate family

undersætte (verb) – transearly (extremely not literally) Allow me to explain: in Danish translate is oversætte (lit. over + set, likely a calque of Latin trādūcō via German übersetzen). When you underdo the act of oversætte, so when you translate something badly, especially if you do it too literally, you have not translated it – you have transearlied it (excuse my creative liberties here)

hils (verb, imperative) – tell them I said hello You can use this in literally any situation when someone announces they are going anywhere at all. To Austria? Hils! Grandpa's uncle's dog's funeral? Hils! The restroom? Hils! (even better if it's not a public restroom). However, this is traditionally used to tell someone to tell the person on the other end of a phone call hello from you

knep (interj.) – fuck (literally) Literal translation of English fuck. This is considered extremely vulgar in the same way that I think fuck is to especially older speakers of English (?)

stande (verb, dialect) – refurb An alternate way to say istandsætte (long, boring, standard Danish) in the dialect of the area of Jylland where I'm from (Salling). It means to fix, repair or refurbish

slo (adj., dialect) – stale Literally means the same as stale, which (imo) doesn't have an actual word in standard Danish. Your crisps got old and soft? Slo. Bread old and dry? Slo. Straw wet and moldy? Slo. Soda lost all its fizz? Slo. Again, this is sallingbomål <3

goddawsbjerg (interj.) – g'day-hill Say this when it is clear someone has not been following what has been said or has happened around them, kind of as to say "thrilled you decided to join us mentally as well as physically". As for the prevalence, I literally don't know anyone outside of my immediate family who uses this

idyllerisk (adj.) – idyllicish Literally just idyllic but funnier

bajselademad (noun, fk.) – pinchocowich Bajselademad is a portmanteau of the words bajer/bajser 'beer' (slang, so I used pint instead of beer) and chokoladelademad 'chocolate sandwich' (open faced, obviously). It literally just means a beer

puttesove (verb) – tucky-sleep A sorta cutesy, joking way to say sleep. Putte is the word for tucking someone in, as well as just chilling in bed – with at least a blanket or duvet if not several in addition to pillows

diskodaskoluderbenzin (noun, uncountable) – disco dasco whore gasoline Excuse the misogynistic overtones, but I just genuinely think this is a very funny was of describing low percentage vodka- or rum-basesd drinks (for example Bacardi Breezer)

kodyl (adj.) – aspirin Kodyl means great or exaggerated, and you can also use it as an interjection kodylt! like you would use 'swell!', because it is pretty outdated. Kodyl was originally a brand of painkiller

hurtigkneppersko (noun, fk. pl.) – fast-fucker shoes Expensive men's shoes, usually of some kind of skin, be it leather or snake. It implies the wearer of the shoes is a braggart with nothing to really brag about. This was added to the dictionary fairly recently, to the great amusement of many Danes

slam! (onomatopoeia) – whack! An onomatopoetic word imitating the sound of being hit. Used not unlike the (now somewhat outdated) English "oooh, burn!" or just "ouch!" to indicate that something said to someone in your company was (perhaps unnecessarily) blunt, rude, or just shut them down really quickly – like a slap to the face

hjemmebragt (adj.) – home mrade Or, more accurately, home brought. Most commonly used for baked goods (originating from hjemmebagt 'baked at home') that you intended to make yourself, but you just didn't have time, so you bought it at the corner store instead. Its use has, however, in my experience been extended to include most anything that """should've""" been homemade, but isn't

konge (adj.) – king When something is really good, it's konge. Anything can be konge, from a chair to the meal your mother cooked you on your bi-annual visit at home.

brugsvildledning (noun, fk.) – user misleader · deceptions for use A play on the word for 'user guide', brugsvejledning, swapping out the nominalised form of the verb vejlede 'guide, lead' for that of vildlede ' 'mislead, decive'

ork (noun, fk.) – bear An ork is something that you just really cannot be bothered to do, because it would require some kind of effort. Doesn't matter how much effort, as it could be anything from getting your drink that you forgot in your kitchen, only realising this after you sat down, to explaining to your homophobic uncle why it's not acceptable to call gay people slurs, even if it is "just a joke". Most often, it is the former of those two scenarios

dak (noun, uncountable) – boom* Short for dakkedak, which is an onomatopoetic name for music with a strong, repetitive bass rhythm. *this is a bad translation, but it's the best I could come up with

gråssenollike (noun, fk.) – greyish feather-brain A joke-y name for a house sparrow, gråspurv. Gråsse is presumed to either originate from plain gråspurv or gråsset 'grey-ish', and nollike is a word that can mean fool, but also be used about animals or women in jest.

skemad (noun, uncountable) – spoon food Literally anything you can eat with a spoon. I believe its most common use is for the food you first give babies when they are moving on from nursing to real food, but I know quite a few people who use it for cereal because we literally only have the word “morgenmadsprodukter” for it, which is a mouthful to say.

[messicb]

istg preach aşko. this euros showed the true colors of every racist and xenophobic bitch on the continent. it's laughable and pathetic how turkish joy is enough to spark so much hatred and vitriol. stay mad girlies, this is only the beginning for us!! our nt is young and has nothing but a bright future ahead of them!! ❤️🇹🇷

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK ASKIM! our team is full of young, promising men who are very talented and passionate about the game! for the first time in my life i'm very hopeful about turkish national team, we will come back stronger and we will go further! a lot of success is waiting to be achieved and i'm brave about our boys' ability! THE WOLVES WILL RETURN!!

our joy is enough to make them shiver and i think that's so fucking iconic of us! what is funnier is that most turkish people are chill as fuck and if they weren't try to ban merih's wolf sign we would still see these two faced europeans as our friends.. thanks to uefa every turk who separated by politics (akp supporters and akp haters) got together, which is something i thought was impossible. i'm dead serious when i say this, no turkish person would be able to do that. so thank you uefa from the bottom of my heart!<3

also imagine being a german, exposed to turkish people and their culture, and still not being able to predict that we are driven by our emotions and hate from other nations is what makes us stand together. what motivated Ataturk to do what he did was the hate turks received under the ottomans. he started the fire that made turks follow him, and now merih did the same thing (not the same obvi but you know what i mean) and we followed; right now making a wolf sign is viral in turkey. and before this incident it was seen as a joke, something to be made fun of. we should really thank nancy faeser for lighting the spark our right wing couldn't! even my non turkish friends who live in turkey do the wolf sign now..

stay mad girlies! you tell em askim!

[coredrill]

this post is not abt bravern but it Is abt my Bravern Feelings

i miss this show so much already SOBS. i did enlist another g roup of irl friends to watch it w me though and we are starting tomorrow so yay :] and also beware the rewatch posts

[guy who has said that i'm glad i watched this live every week voice] i'm rly glad i watched this live, but this time its bc. i think there is something so truly and genuinely special abt the way that the theories abt bravern himself evolved week to week.........like at first everyone was like Well maybe he's an evil alien who is gonna Kill isami. and then everyone was like Well maybe he's a death drive and isami is his lulu. and THEN everyone was like Well there's still some knuth in there so. but none of that was the case!!! none of that was true!!! it was literally just this one guy and all of the love he has and Absolutely Sucks Shit at expressing!!!!!!! and i just. idk. that hits me rly hard that maybe it was percieved as sinister at first just cause it was a little Off but in the end it was something really really sweet :] it also just feels like yet another way of the show doing its "we know audiences aren't willing to accept optimism at face value these days" schtick like they mentioned in that one interview and just. showing how bravern himself evolves in the eyes of the viewer. it's rly special to me :]

i know bravern speaking german in ep2 was a nod to the translator he uses on superbia later but. what if someone loved you so much they became german (if i ever mention kyouji again in a bravern context just fucking shoot me)

WILD to watch the finale and then see the isami hate train take off FKSJDHFJ cause i feel like i adored him so much in that ep LMAO. my guy really felt every emotion known to man in the span of 22 minutes and then started makin gup new ones. he's very human!!! and i love that abt him!!!!

although some takes. i'm ngl. i know we joke abt subtext and cowards but it becomes less funny when the subtext that is there is missed LMAO

sorry to keep bringing up ep4 but i think its SO interesting how like. the way that bravern seems to helps isami out emotionally in that ep actually ends up not helping him in the long run aswell? like getting to know all those ppl care abt him is good ofc but it also feeds Directly into his hangups in ep5. and i remember being a little confused as to Why that was the case on first watch cause ep4 was So abt his beef w lulu (FLSDKJFH) but w the smith being a human again thing in the end it makes. so much more sense!!!!! i can't wait to rewatch the show w it still fresh in my mind and find even more!!!!!!

and omg the beef with lulu. literally nothing is funnier to me than "we are gonna have one Rival Fight in this show and that position is gonna be filled by isami and smith's fucking KID" SOBS. LIKE. it kills me FKSLDJFHL. though i will say again that i think it is So fucking special that in ep10 lulu specifically calls out isami taking care of her after smith dies and it apparently happens to such a degree that like. he is worth her time traveling back to save independently aswell? even though there was no way that he "took care of her" for more than a couple days? which i think just says so much abt isami in the sense that like. at no point before ep6-7ish in his arc would he have even entertained that idea. uwu

i think i said this before but ikd if i included the screenshot but. the fact that while bravern is dying he sees THAT SAME FUCKING PICTURE is just evidence that men do not take enough photos i think

there is literally Nothing more onbrand for bravern than the fucking. "ep13 abema listing" (if anyone who has not heard abt that sees this. it was just a rebroadcast of ep12 mislabeled) sending everyone into a tizzy regarding like. Secret Episode Question Mark except half of everyone being convinced its an april fools joke and the other half being convinced that the april fools joke is that we didn't expect it. and then it turns out to not be interntional atall and the real april fools joke is Fry Pan. SOBS

Crunchyroll I Am Begging You If You Dub This Please Dub The Songs Too Oh My God (<- delusional)

anyways!!!!!!!!!!! again i know recency bias is the killa but god. i really loved this show a lot!!!! it might be an alltime fave story for me in general!!!!!! even if it's not it was a really special experiance and story on the whole and i'm just really really happy i get to carry it in my heart forever :]

[popculturebuffet]

Sam and Max Beyond Time and Space Retrospective: Night of the Raving Dead

Happy halloween all you happy freelance police. I"m jake and my Sam and Max Beyond Time and Space retrospective continues as Sam and Max fight a guy who sucks just in time for spooky season.

Chapter 3 gives us a fun spooky good time as we have zombies, frankenstines and vampires as our dynamic duo have to beat a club hopping german vampire before his army of the undead conquer the world. So a normal tuesday really. Can our heroes save the world.. again? Will we have to see a lot of pierced vampire nipples? Is Lincoln still the worst Short answer, of course, just look at the article image, and i'm still in cringing agony so.. can confirm. Long answer is under the cut!

Night of the Raving Dead begins In Media Res and milks it for all it's worth: Sam and Max are in a soul sucking machine, at the mercy of Jurgen, a european vampire who never wears a shirt but does gladly show off his pierced nipples. Still better than bebops. Firm 6/10.

At any rate pierced nips aren't the issue as the threat here is your old fashioned spike wall style trap I know just the man for the job but sadly he's was a bit busy with his own spiked wall issues

So instead we flash back to the start of this tale.

And to my delight our heroes continue to pile up junk in their office. Sam has now added a holy urn and is still high priest seperation of chruch and state kneels before god emperor priest president Max!

Our heroes have a bit of infestation though in their office there's something all too familiar

These are not greasy teen zombies or greasy gnomes or even the dreaded Crombie, but European Zombies! So it's up to us to talk to everyone and find out why. In an intresting reversal this time it's Bosco whose closed, while Sybil's reopened her place, because we psychologically tortured him into disappearing.

Sybil meanwhile is looking for love in all the wrong places as after her relationship with Abe Ended she's restarted her dating service.. but just for her. After the obvious sex work joke because this is the 2000's, Sybil is basically screening dates... and is currnetly screening a moleman.

But after he failed we're left with Harry Moleman. Whose back for some reason. Gotta reuse those models I guess. He has aboslutely no shot and Sybil is being just polite. He also has a choclate heart we'll need later and a fear of zombie's we'll exploit later

Moving over to Stinky's her latest special is a gooey cake/chekov's gun, while her latest item we can grab is a sunlamp bulb since even she has no idea why it's there, but the plot does. The plot sees all.

Anyway abe's also there.. .and still the worst as he blames Sybil for the breakup, is stalking her and won't shut up

Yeah I liked Abe at first.. but in a record TWO episodes he's gone from endearing into the hall

It's a shame too as I really DID like abe in season one and the first episode of this but this gag, ESPECIALLY wiith how the sybil plot concludes, really dosen't work.

Thankfully we move on to our boys the C.O.P.S. who have decided to captalize on this to sell internet to zombies, via online trial discs. For those too young to know what those are

For now though we can't get any of those future coasters, but we do found out poor bluster has some brain damage which was also funnier at the time. We do find out the source of the ZOmbies: the zombie factory in Stuttgard, Germany. And to my shock Stuttgart is a real place. I would've asked my german friend , but she needs sleep and isn't awake till midnight like moi.... am I a vampire? ... no. No I love garlic bread too much to make that sacrifice. Then again It'd also make it easier to meet Matt Berry.. dammit this is a dillema.

While I mull this over we move on to Stuttgard. I didn't ask said friend, @galaxysupernaturalstuff because again, asleep.. and because I forgot earlier. Though I probably DON'T need an actual german to tell me "yeah Stuttgart isn't a small villiage with a giant castle in the middle of it. "They thankfully don't do too many german stereotypes about the country as a whole, the only gags they do being the fairly innocent beerstein and the fact Midtown Cowboys is big there. It's done more in a tounge in cheek way than anything genuinely offensive.

Turns out the Zombie Factory is both your standard spooky hammer horror style monster castle.. and a club, and to get in we need to get past the bouncer, good old superball.

Yeah like the Bosco scremaing thing this is a runner nad a truly great one. Also unlike that one it's both nonseical and you can't get punched for it. He's working for Jurgen, our big bad, because his doors are rich fine mahogany.. and he needs SOMETHING to do after the divorce. He was married. I'd.. genuinely forgot that.

To get past him we once again have to do something that's likely to get me sent to hell for playing this game: take a brain from a fresh corpse

Then we throw it to a gargoyle which suprisingly ISN'T alive, nor voiced by keith david despite it being night, allowing us to cut the line.

It's inside we get a ZOMBIE DISCO BITCHES. We meet our arc villian and the mastermind behind this half baked scheme, Jurgen. Jurgern.. is a deliglight: he's basically every 20 something trying to seem cool by clubing distilled into a vampire and given a german accent and nipple rings. And he is glorious. The fact his plan is just "Conquer teh world with zombies" jah helps. our heroes just try to go for the head.. but Jurgen can teleport so we need to take the source of his powers: his...

And it's fun too as each one is simply hitting him with his vampire weakensses.. and the how, as usual is fun and redicuous. That being said actually solving these puzzles.. is a lot. I ended up hitting a dead end: I figured given the tropes at play that the key was to trigger some type of hidden entrance to get up to the balcony to replace the bulbs in the spotlight with the sunlamp. And it is.. btu the how is INCREDIBLY overcomplicated. While the writing couldn't be stronger this chapter and where your supposed to go MOSTLY straight foward, the actual puzzles are often overcomplicated. The ones in the Zombie Factory itself rely HEAVILY on a dj soundboard , which you have to put the right words from one of jurgen's poems into, without it being clear which words in the poem are a clue. Also solving the spotlight DOSEN'T fix the problem and you still have two other things to do to him, only one of which is pretty easy to figure out since after Jurgen mentions he's a huge midtown cowboys fangboy, a new area unlocked announcment shows up. As it did with the COPS when this castle unlocked. Both a great gag and a nice bit of gameplay magic to make this easier.

So yeah.. I used a guide for most of this. This is one of the trickier ones gameplay wise and if you don't adventure game often or have a lot of patience

It can be maddening. There's also another "pick a random dialouge option fo ra song" puzzle like last season, which just.. isn't fun. Picking various options is only funny if there's multiple jokes, like the cooking without looking segment from last game. Basically asking "PICK RANDOM DIALOUGE FOR US FEASANT" isn't fun it's just keeping me from having fun with the part of the game I actually like.

So with that we an shine a little sunlight on Jurgen's life, causing him to freak out and loose a little respect of his fanbase. Like any influencer in embyro, just one stab to his rep isn't going to do it but it's a start. Next it's time to return to Midtown Cowboys! Their probably hiding a cow. Midtown Cowboys have been saved from cancelation baby! See back then Networks actually.. payed attention to things like audience numbers or dvd and digital sales instead of guarding the numbers like a cave troll so they can cancel whatever they want whenever they want. Gee I wonder why the actor's strike has taken 105 days with that kind of job security.

As it turns out Midtown Cowboys is HUGE in germany, with WARP having converted to just shooting Midtown Cowboys and spinoffs. Hey at least they beat Disney+ to the punch with that model. Turns out the statoin lady's been TRYING to get our heroes back in they've just been busy and such.. and max also deleted her messages because he be like that.

We also reunite with my boy Mr. Featherly, who legally changed his name from Philo Pennyworth. While he DID go back to theater even he can't resist the siren call of "buy your own private island fortress" money. Max naturally signed away those rights without thinking. They lost 4 executives that day..so you know it's not all bad.

We can still use the broadcast to our advntage though, stashing some garlic cigarettes from outside the castle in Featherly's bag as a prop. What follows.. is comedy gold. While we sadly don't get a cookin without lookin sequel, I wanted to use baboon hearts, what we do get is just as funny as we get a very special episode, the kind sitcoms used to do to tackle the heavy issues instead of just weaving them in if it fits the tone.

The cowboys hold an interviention for mr. featherly, who finds out they were indeed hiding a cow but he has his own cow.. a smoking addiction. Even Bessie is disapointed. It then quickly turns into an add for smoking and why it's totally rad and you should all do it as their sponsor.. is garlic clove cigarettes. It's so fucked and I love it. IT's a simple idea i'm genuinely suprised I haven't seen elsewhere and genius.

So with that we just have one last thing to destroy this man's career: we need a man of the faith to bless some water bottles we got at the club. But since Shelby isn't around, we'll have to make do with max, dunking the water bottles in his sacred urn while he gives us the sacred rites

The problem is as seen with the cigs, while Jurgen is many things, a hipster, a scene kid, a goth, a tool, a vampire, a mild german sterotype, a dracula, an emo, a direct to video sequel to Dracula 2000, a nipple piercing sorta guy, european, german, big dicked, bad at poetry, a plagarist, a mad scientest, an outer god... he is not dumb enough to let people carry in his weaknesses. Dumb enough to keep some of them in his private lab as we'll see, but still not dumb enough to let vampire hunters right in.

So to get it past we have to have max drink the holy water. You'd think this would mean max would get set on fire, another vampire weakness but it just give shim a halo. I guess his own religion can't cast him into the firey depths.

It's a once again limited time thing.. though I don't get WHY in this case. I get having it wear off to show it has to be used IN the castle.. but why does it wear off on the dance floor.

Anyways to beat jurgen we have to out out emo him with lyrics about darkness, no parents, continued darkness, and of course

We DO basically win, but normally jurgen would copy us. I know because I did this puzzle before knowing the solution. He drinks max. Thankfully his drinking Holy Water makes him need to go potty. You know if I had a nickle for every time we had to defeat one of our foes by making him need to go to the bathroom i'd have three nickels.. which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened thrice.

So we follow Jurgen to his lair but given we've only done three puzzle's we're not done yet, two act structure and all as SAM AND MAX ENGAGE IN THE MOST THRILLING BATTLE OF THEIR CAREERS... bringing them to the trap.. which thanks to Sam being busy recapping, works and swallows our heroes souls. Jurgen goes.. somewhere, leaving us in his study. We find some useful junk, including a stake, and a monster.

This is Jurgen's Monster, who like his master I dearly love, a poetic beast whose mad you brought him to life as he's so lonely. Can relate dude, can, relate.

Helping him win a date with Sybil is our main quest from her eon out as she has a soul mater, a weird horrifying eldrich device she dosen't know how to use, so her finding her soul mate means we can have it. Which is good because Sam and Max's souls don't want to go back after how their bodies have misused them, waiting to go to the next life. To put a stop to our souls going to hell a few chapters early we need that soul mater.

What follows is a LOT of stuff since we don't have just 7 days to make jurgen a mannnnnnnnnnnn. We can't get him pink and quite clean but we CAN get him a brain via our old friend Flint Paper and the Zombie of Abe LIncon. Yeah turns out Abe was buried in Stuttgart and thus we meet the real abe whose loyal to his dead wife and actually likeable. Sadly he's brutalyl murdered because Flint Paper is on the warpath. He wants to kill us because "THey'd rather be dead than undead!" Sam and Max don't remember making him promise that and thus use another hidden passage to knock him out and get the brain.

Next we need a proper hand. Thankfully the zombie from the intro stole jessie james hand, which is now alive and holding up girl stinky. To get it we need to trick it and this puzzle is clever: the hand hops every time it shoots. So we simply have to make it get all the way to girl stinky, then put his attention her so it goes the other way.. straight into the goey cake. We got our HANNNDDD BACCCKKKK.

We now need to give him some heart. This one's a tad overcomplicated, even by this chapter's standards: first we need to play the cops game for this chapter, distrubing internet demo disks paperboy style. This game is tricky, but unlike the difficulty in this chapter, it's a fair kind once you figure it out. You have to move your car to be in the right position to hit the zombies with a disk. It's still hard, but it's the fun kind of hard

With that we have a big anetna we can bolt cutter off the car and use to power up Jurgen's alchemy machine.

To get our final body part though we need to play the dating game against featherly and harry moleman

Harry is just hopeless and Featherly is pretentious: LIncoln's brain is the only thing Sybil liked about him, and the hand has jurgen spell out I love sybil. Awwwwww. We just need a heart of gold as the ones we have are a clock and plants that make us into mr. van dresen. I mean .. you'd think playing a good rendention of lesbian segull would woo her but I guess it's not her thing.

No we need a heart. Luckily Harry takes his time answering a question and has a choclate heart, and even more luckily this time ruining his life dosen't feel bad as he's tried to murder us, sybil and really had ZERO chance before shouting at us.

With that we can be in it to win it, using the science and the alchemy to give us a gold heart and winning Sybils. Unfourtnatley the game then makes a pretty bleh error in judgment, as Sybil realizes she still wants abe and.. runs off to apologize to the bastard

Yeah this joke is all kinds of messed up. I get her going back IS the joke, that he's bad for her.. but it just comes off stupid, and mildly sexist as it feeds into the old "oh women like jerks" sterotypes instead of "abusive relationships happen". I mean it's a lot to ask sam and max to be realistic, so i'm fine with that but it's not a lot to ask them to actually be funny if their going to do something this annoying.

So on that sour note the climax. We get our souls back and fight jurgen, who has a plan.. of.. some sort. Anyways we can't stake him because we're too slow, so we toss the soul mater to jurgen's monster pull the lever kronk and swap bodies, using his to finally put this chapter to it's eternal rest... but not before flint comes in and tragically jurgen's monster dies.

I'm.. still not over it but i've been asured he returns somehow. And there's no time to punch flint for this as it turns out the reason he dived in guns a blazing to see us earlier is that he needs our help: bosco isn't just missing... he's NOWHERE ON EARTH

Night of the Raving dead is one of my faviorite chapters writing wise, with lots of clever jokes, an all timer villian and tons of my faviorite characters.. and abe. The abe stuff drags it down slightly, but everything else is so good this is easily my second faviorite chapter of the games thus far behind Save the World's The Mafia, the Mole and the Meatball.

It still suffers from some of this games overarching issues: the puzzles are more obtuse, the writing can be a bit mean spirited, and I don't have a third thing. Beyond Time and Space thus far isn't BAD, and has legs up on it's predecessor with gorgeous environments, but it still feels a bit of a step back from the previous one. It's got a bigger budget.. but it's just not as fun as the later chapters of save the world. It's not a bad game, the writing is as sharp as ever and most of your terrible actions are too over the top to not be funny, but it dosen't have quite the charm the first one did.

Next Time: I .. genuinely dont' know. The descrption for this one is more vauge. the only thing I know for sure is we'll finally meet THEM

Thanks for reading

[mytastessuck]

Starbomb: Starbomb

Eeeeeyup.

So, to ruin my credibility even further...yes, I am a Game Grumps fan. I started watching them out of curiosity in 2016 and watched them on and off for a while until I fell in the trap of those damn Sleeping Aids videos uploaded by their fans and I've been watching them semi-regularly since.

Are they perfect? Fuck no. They suck at games and Egoraptor is the bad Mike Tyson simile of previously problematic content creators. But you already know I'm a NSP fan and I like Danny's singing voice and some of Egoraptor's raps (have fun finding the ones without the n-word!) are pretty skilled and he has a genuine love for the genre and, somewhat more importantly, those games he's bad at. So there, my justification for being a Starbomb fan...despite the fact I've uploaded Starbomb songs before so this really shouldn't have come as a surprise to anyone. Since the album was uploaded for free, I'm going to upload the whole thing below so feel free to read after every song so that everyone can know how to feel after every song. Now...COMMENCE THE CRINGE!

Intro

God, this whole thing is nostalgic. The guys introduce themselves and Arin does a rather impressive paraphrasing of a Fair Use segment that shows that 1. since this album is a parody and 2. they acknowledge they don't own the characters, they don't technically need to be sued. as of January 12, 2024, Nintendo and others apparently agreed.

Song Score: 7/10

2. I Choose You To Die

This is the gate: if this song turns you off, you're probably going to hate this album. Starbomb doesn't care about canon, your feelings or even making clever jokes about the franchise: they thought it would be funny if there was a story about Ash going around fucking up Pokemon, going to jail, getting bailed out and shot in the sack by Pikachu. Is it funny? By my standards...meh. It didn't really grab me. My own description of the song is honestly funnier to me than the actual song itself. I don't hate it but it's definitely not how I would introduce someone to the band.

Song Score: 5/10

3. Luigi's Ballad

Here we go, the real shit: with special guest vocalist Rachel Goddamn Bloom (Crazy Ex Girlfriend creator and star), we get crassed up versions of Mario, Luigi and Peach as the brothers fight over her in a hilarious ditty. Arin is having fun, Danny is competent and Rachel is perfect, like always...I'm actually glad that Peach didn't pick a brother at the end because, as douchey as Mario was being, Luigi didn't give an actual reason for being attracted to her. Maybe he was just as shallow as Mario only he was more devious about it? Who cares? Peach is going to fuck a mushroom.

Song Score: 9/10

4. It's Dangerous To Go Alone

A bit darker but still a well-done song (Philly shout-out! Woo! We suck less than Raccoon City!). They gave Danny the lead in this and it works, Arin's freak-out at the end as Link is legitimately chortle-inducing. Chortle-inducing I say. Sexual predation has never been (subjectively) funnier.

Song Score: 9/10

5. Mega Martial Problems

Might be my favorite song on the album. Mega Man and his wife (Roll? Some chick? Who cares?) are being given marriage counseling (sex counseling, actually) by Dr. fucking Wily and Mega Man kills robot masters to get toys to fuck his wife with, ending with Zero being killed by his Mega Dick. Arin is a good rapper and Danny manages to sing distinctly as a german doctor and Mega Man's wife (he raps a bit at the end...it's actually listenable). Seriously, if you're not the biggest Mega Man fan and if canon isn't important to you, go check this song out.

Song Score: 10/10

6. Rap Battle: Ryu Vs. Ken

Hur hur, Ryu rules, Ken sucks, hur hur. That doesn't bother me though. What does bother me is the content of Ryu's lyrics: he's supposed to be talking about how badass he is and he keeps going on about his dick? Forget canon character, if he was just some nobody he would sound like he's eight years old! Once you hear it, you won't unhear it. It's just a bit...desperate? And I can't help but feel like I'm supposed to take him seriously. This song is fine for the most part but...yeah, definitely one of the weaker ones on re-listens.

Song Score: 6/10

7. Crasher-vania

Pretty funny song about Simon Belmont committing hate crimes against the creatures of the night having a Monster Mash. Fun fact: I don't know the story behind this but Arin and Danny did a censored version of this song for a MST3K telethon. See it here:

Song Score: 8/10

8. The Book of Nook

On a re-listen, this is a competently hilariously fucked up song about Tom Nook being a dickhead mafia landlord...but I'm detracting a whole point for the use of the archaic slur "mongoloid". I guess they didn't want to use "retard" and tried to be smart about it. Sorry guys; try harder.

Song Score: 8/10 (I still gave it a high score so maybe I'm part of the problem.)

9. Sonic's Best Pal

Probably my other favorite song on the album. The perfect Sonic darkfic: Tails snaps due to his insecurity (Hey! A canonical character flaw; I'll wave as I see it fly by.), gets on drugs, fucks whores and shoots Eggman. They knew what they were going for and they got it. Kudos, Starbomb.

Song Score: 10/10

10. Regretroid

Emily Hughes (pretty neat singer and apparently a friend of Danny's...I don't know) stars as an understandably grumpy Samus against the Nice Guy (TM) Kraid in this epic star tale. Awesome tune with a hilariously dark ending (I mean...it's not like the puppies were destined for a good life if space dragons were just handing them out in baskets.)

Song Score: 8/10

11. Kirby's Adventures In Reamland

Either this or the Tom Nook song was the first song recorded for the album and, unlike Tom Nook's song, Starbomb hates this one. Me? Another "meh"....it's crass for the sake of crass but the guys are doing that the whole album so I'm not really affected by it. They spitroast Kirby and namedrop Meta Knight and Dedede. That's it. Move along, barely anything to see here.

Song Score: 7/10

12. The Simple Plot of Final Fantasy 7

Ha! Take THAT, convoluted JRPGs! Seriously, this is one of the better songs on the album and I love how they try to turn Cloud into this smooth talking self-aggrandizing asshole (not a far cry from him in canon, mind) and how they didn't call Ryu by name. He's Ninja Gaiden now. Perfect way to end the album.

Song Score: 9/10

13. Outro

Just the guys being dorks and teasing the second album (Player Select; won't be reviewing that one so I'll spoil my opinion for you: it's not as good as the first one.). It was always fun to hear them fuck around. Reminds me a bit of their Sleep Aids.

Song Score 8/10

Album Score: 8/10

Decent album. As we all know, I have shit taste so that makes my opinion superior to yours. Since this was an album review, I'll be taking a week off to unwind and come back next Friday with the typical song a day schedule. See you then.

[somanyfuckedupiftruebooks]

Mag 23

It finally happened folks! More than halfway into series one and we hit two milestones I was waiting for with the same statement!

By my reckoning, we now have at least one statement primarily dealing with each of Smirke's 14 (including Extinction, for those who observe). The Eye was lucky last!

We have hit the first statement that I have no memory of. I don't know what the fuck is happening in this statement.

Let's dive in.

Well, here's why I don't remember this. I never paid much attention to the historical statements, because I figured they were just flavour. It's not like anything from 200 years ago could still be relevant to our main plot, right?

I'm an idiot.

Anyway, there's a lot of important firsts here! If I'm remembering correctly, this is our first mention of Jonah Magnus. It's definitely the first statement we've gotten from someone in his harem*. And it's our first glimpse at the beginnings of the Archives/Institute itself. That's a lot of important information that past me for some reason decided was too boring to pay attention to.

*Maybe you want to say that not everyone who sent a letter to Jonah Magnus was a fuck buddy of his, but my interpretation is funnier so I disrepectfully disagree. He may as well have written, 'My darling Jonah you must think me so dreadful for being away with my wife (whose name I obviously don't remember because the transcripts use Clara and Carla interchangeably) all winter, but I'm bringing you a nice book as a present to make up for it. Hornily yours, Albrecht.'

Desperate to know what these opinions are. No idea what the German Confederation is and I don't care enough to look it up, but I want to hear Elias throw 200 year old shade about it.

Ah, the olden times, when you carried a pistol around in case you had to shoot at brigands. Simplier times...

Shout out to Albrecht for the correct reaction of backing the fuck away from the creepy stranger saying ominous shit about the dead and fear. And a much more enthusiastic shout out to Neddy No Eyes for pulling my favourite move ever and disappearing without a trace as soon as someone watching you looks away. He's living the dream.

*Clapping and cheering like I'm at a sports game* Hurray! No pants Martin!! Yay!!!

Okay, serious talk. Has anyone ever come up with a reason why Martin was going into Jon's office wearing nothing but his underwear? It's early enough in the morning that he wouldn't have been working, and he outright says that he wasn't expecting Jon to be there. So what was he doing?

I swear to god the episode doesn't even address it. Jon is so flustered by pantless Martin that he asks no follow up questions, and Martin offers no explanation.

These are the important questions that I hope we finally get answers to in The Magnus Scrotocol.

I desire this man carnally.

^ Flirting.

Okay, pretty sure on my first listen through I was under the vauge impression that this was an early iteration of the Library of Jurgen Leitner. Probably because I'm a very stupid person and thought 'Jurgen' and 'Johann' sounded similar enough that the weird book collection must mean they were connected in some way.

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Your rant about college au's and high school- first of all, I relate lol. Second of all, I had a slightly different college experience because I went to school at a teeny tiny women's college (700 students at most, no Greek life, no football). So it wasn't that there was a single student everyone knew, but that everyone just knew everyone. I love that I had that experience, but honestly reading Physical Paradox makes me wonder what going to a bigger school, a larger pond, if you will, would have been like. My grad school is still super tiny compared to most colleges in the state even though it feels a bit bigger to me. Maybe I'll get to experience it for my post doc - but if I only experience it through Physical Paradox, I can't complain :)

See, that reminds me of small-town syndrome. And as someone who is from a semi-small town, and whose mom is definitely from a small town (like, you mention her maiden name to someone there and everyone in a ten-foot radius knows who you're talking about 🙃) I feel like I would have hated that lol.

Though, I will say I went to a community college for a couple years before university, and that was actually really nice. But there weren't really people I saw regularly.

There's a level of anonymity to a big school that's super comforting.

I RANTED AND IT IS BELOW THE CUT 😂😂

When it came to my school, there were around... 35-40k students when I was in undergrad? We had a homecoming king and queen every year who were from some of the larger organizations or greek groups, but I couldn't tell you their names then or now. No one except the people in those orgs cared. Ever. They got people to vote by offering them free things. No one cared because it was literally just, "I need to survive this week. My future is on the line so why do I give a fuck if some asshole gets to walk on the football field and wear a fake crown?"

We had a student body president, but AGAIN I COULD NOT TELL YOU THE NAME OF ANY OF THEM EVER. (wait, that's a lie, one of my friends went to high school with one of them, so I spoke to him once in the hallway of the English building when he stopped to talk to her - long before he became student body president - and then promptly never spoke to him ever again. I think his name was Ben? 🤔)

I wasn't in any clubs, and I was never in a sorority, either, so things were likely very different for people who were. But I really enjoyed my undergrad and grad experience. I was depressed as fuck, but I still am, so I can't blame school for that lol.

When it came to recognizing people, I'm not joking when I say Mahomes was the only one people recognized. The quarterback a few years later was one of my friends' students and SHE HAD NO FUCKING CLUE WHO HE WAS AND NEITHER DID THE REST OF US BECAUSE WE STOPPED CARING ONCE WE COULDN'T GO TO THE GAMES FOR FREE.

If anything, there were a few professors who taught the basic courses that everyone knew because they'd taken a class with them because they had to at some point (a history, anthropology, science, or art history class). But I'm talking like, "Oh, Dr. Whatshisface, who teaches that one super weird class that counts as this core credit so you don't have to take the boring version? Yeah, everyone took that class." there was a professor who taught a northern myths and legends class who looked like a mix of Chris Hemsworth and Russel Crowe, it was strange. He also taught German. Most people had heard of him because he dressed up as Thor every Halloween to make his students laugh. He was really nice. He let us watch movies as extra credit.

Now, departments? Oh, the departments talked. Every department had professors everyone knew or hated or loved. My fave prof was a lit professor everyone thought was super hot (I've genuinely always been creeped out by this, and what's funnier is that he was also creeped out.) My least favorite was the asshole I've mentioned before, and literally no one liked him.

SO. Physical Paradox Goinko makes sense from a professor perspective because word spreads about the good and bad professors. "Don't take this guy because he's an asshole" "take this professor because she's wonderful" "if you take this guy, the class fucking sucks but it's actually really great and you learn a lot" "that guy is a dick, but he's actually a good teacher if you give him a chance"

That kind of shit always goes around. People ask acquaintances about professors or specific classes because a professor makes or breaks that class for the semester. I remember being devastated when a class I was taking got switched to a different prof last minute and GUESS WHAT IT WAS HORRIBLE. ONE OF THE ONLY B'S I GOT IN GRAD SCHOOL. FUCK THAT GUY.

But I'm trying to keep it as realistic as possible when it comes to the student aspect. Because people just don't know each other and they honestly don't give a fuck most of the time. You meet someone in a class and you become decent enough friends, but if you never speak to them again after that? Meh. No biggie. That's what Rinko and Geto were like before the class in Theoretical Introduction. They likely would have still become better friends in that class, even without Gojo there, though.

Grad school was different because you have cohorts and those are smaller groups of people you're with until you finish your program, but even then? I know next to nothing about anyone who was in my program aside from my best friend. BUT WE ONLY BECAME GOOD FRIENDS BECAUSE WE WERE OFFICE MATES. WE WOULD HAVE NEVER SPOKEN OUTSIDE OF CLASSES IF NOT FOR THAT. I think there were five(? it's been so long I actually can't remember) of us, and we became friends in that we occasionally grabbed drinks together and graded together but beyond that? I still speak to two people, including my best friend. The other lives kinda close to me now anD I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T RESPONDED TO A TEXT FROM HER IN WEEKS HOLY FUCK WE WERE TRYING TO PLAN GETTING DINNER-

okay rant over i'm gonna go reply and try to be a decent friend 🫠🫠🫠

[darlenicy]

Okay, so I am watching season 5 and I won't hide my opinion on it

Episode 5x2

1stly I have to say, that watching this gives me physical pain. 😂 s4 was super duper good compared to this. But let's start with ep 2:

Let Musa sing, Bloom!

➡ honestly, it looks and feels so wrong to see the actual fairy of music with the angelic voice being reduced to a random band member

➡ Layla however fits the part of a drummer imo

I love how these guardian selkies are super useless but I have to admit, they're kinda cute. Better than the ugly pets anyway. And they have a task to fulfill and therefore and excuse to be in the show

also why is Tritannus' trident just lying there? shouldn't someone like..store it somewhere instead of letting it lie there in the dungeons on the floor?

also idk what happened to the Trix but the imprisonment must have been so traumatic to them that Icy suffers from a strong out-of-character sickness

➡ everyone knows this, but I'll say it again and again: Icy was totally disgusted by Valtor turning into a monster at the end of s3 and now Tritannus does it and now she's like cool💗

awawawa look at my girls' little faces (but it would've been way funnier if only Icy was the one who looked like that and Stormy and Darcy being 😒)

Layla finds out that Tritannus disturbed the coronation of his brother and is like: WHY DOES HE DO SOMETHING SO HORRIBLE?

➡ firstly: is it really that horrible to disturb a coronation? i mean it's not nice but HORRIBLE? isn't it rather horrible that a father imprisons his own son? And 2ndly do you really wonder about that when you too call Tritannus your psycho cousin? I'm afraid I'll found the Tritannus-Defense-Squad simply because everyone treats him like shit and this even though I don't really know what to think about him lol but this is so unfair

The oil floods the ocean ➡ Tecna: COME ON I HAVE TO FILM THIS! (this might be poorly translated in the German dub since she says in the nickelodeon version, that they had to document it but I find it kinda funny imagining Tecna to be someone who films straight away tragic events. There is car accident? WHERE IS MY CAMERA?)

another thing that makes me wonder if the script writers have actually ever thought about anything is why the oil can't harm the trix but tritannus? Any ideas? no? ok

Stormy: This guy could be our way out of here – Icy: This guy could be the guy for me ➡ stop thinking with your vagina, Icy. that’s so not you (seriously what happened during their imprisonment???)

it's kinda cute how concerned the trix look when tritannus attacked the selkies. It's not like they did the same things to the pixies already

like Stormy is so: OHHH NOO THE POOR BBS

also tritannus looks so ugly lmao what's wrong with you, icy?

and why does tritannus want to earth? Is there a proper reason? To get the oil? Only to get the oil? He really enjoys being an ugly monster? ok

Okay, their flirting is cute, I do admit that. It's better written then skloom and that's funny.

Icy: "We don't have our powers, they were taken from us" (➡ doesn't s1 show us that this is actually impossible????) But if you could ....." *fluttering her eyelashes* Tritannus: ".... restore them?" Icy: yes <;3 OKAY I admit that's cute. Their dynamic is better than skloom's ever was lmao

Tritannus is also a bitch for kajal, isn't he 👁? ⬇

⬆ i mean look at his eyes. good for him i guess.. but look at his eyes! 🤣🤣

Darcy: What do you think? Stormy: …why not – lmao she's like "we’ve nothing better to do now”

➡ but I love seeing them kinda wondering IF they should follow them or not. Before, the trix always did follow the bad guys as a team but now Icy is doing her solo thing and Darcy is like... are we okay with that? and stormy is like: she'll get over him soon

I love the trix being able to sense the magic of the Winx on earth

why do the Winx need SO LONG to transform?? why run away like chickens? you can transform and ahjhhhhggg 🤬

WHY ISN'T ROXY WITH THEM??? Why is she left out again?? She could help! JUSTICE FOR ROXY!

Why do the Winx suddenly know how to breath underwater? Wasn't that like hard in s3? What? We give no fck on continuity? OK

icy crying for help?…………….you fkn serious? ➡ Icy, how out of character do you wanna be? Icy: YES

[dancing-to-architecture]

39 - The Eagles - Hotel California (1976)

Ugh. No. I refuse. You can't fuckin' make me. Give me the screaming German chainsaw techno. Please!

I KNEW that Jeffrey Lebowski was My Guy as soon as he said the immortal line: "Come on, man. I had a rough night and I hate the fuckin' Eagles, man!"

Don't ask me why i hate the eagles. I know they're technically competent and all that, like they're good at what they do. I also have an irrational hatred of Josh Groban and he's technically competent as well.

I think it's a mix of being dramatically overplayed throughout my life and my just being wholly uninterested in any their work, or just a general dislike of most of the people who are vocal fans of the band.

Fuck it. Buy the hellticket, take the hellride.

•Hotel California-

Aww, fuck me, "she got the Mercedes bends" is actually a good turn of phrase. I never once caught it until I actually read it, though.

The line about "we haven't had that spirit here since 1969" only gets dumber and funnier the older this song gets. The dude orders "a wine" and it just blows this guy away!

So, uhh, the food? scares the shit out of the guy? They're all killer robots? But they just can't kill the beast? What the fuck is the end of this stupid fucking song even saying?

Fuck, i hate the Eagles and i hate this goddamn song.

•New Kid In Town-

This feels like 1976. Different singer? Feels a bit more folksy.

Oh boy i really hate this.

•Life In The Fast Lane-

One of the only Eagles songs that doesn't make me wish i was born deaf... might be because i honestly thought this was a Dire Straits song for like 20 years.

But, after reading all the creepy horny lyrics in the verses that i generally can tune out, i almost wish i was born deaf AND blind.

Might be because I've never been all that fond of cars, but why are there so many songs about wanting to fuck in cars?

•Wasted Time-

Breakup song. It's okay. I've heard better ones today, let alone throughout this project.

•Wasted Time-

(Me reviewing this album)

Yeah let's reprise the song we literally just finished, why not? And also give it the same title!

•Victim of Love-

"Clearly, everything is the woman's fault." 🙄

•Pretty Maids All in a Row-

Title sounds like the name of a porno. Interminably slow, with "I'm stoned and this feels deep" lyrics.

After listening to Leonard Cohen talk about similar themes this just feels even more trite.

•Try and Love Again-

It looks from the lyrics that he had a good thing going and went for something else and now he laments what he "lost" (walked away from). 🙄🙄

•The Last Resort-

Worthless hippies and their native cultural appropriation and inability to actually DO anything. Fucking Christian cults and their megachurches actively destroying this country in the name of God, then packaging and selling hope back to the dipshit faithful.

I honestly like what this song is saying, but i think I'd vastly prefer it packaged in a 2 ½ minute long aggressive punk song than some 8 minute grandiose soft rock epic.

Well, it's over, and i still hate the fuckin' Eagles. Next!

Favorite Track: i was initially thinking life in the fast lane but now i am going to say "the peaceful silence after the album was finished".

Least Favorite Track: E. All of the above.

[karometeenk]

J'ai publié 8 964 fois en 2022

C'est 1 743 billets de plus qu'en 2021 !

1 327 billets créés (15%)

7 637 billets reblogués (85%)

Les blogs que j'ai le plus reblogués :

@abba-enthusiast

@ukulelegodparent

@official-rolli-und-rita

@majortomwaits

@bouquet-of-violets

J'ai étiqueté 2 420 billets en 2022

#not me the series - 108 billets

#tatort saarbrücken - 52 billets

#abba circumcision anon - 37 billets

#bad buddy - 36 billets

#karocore - 28 billets

#spatort - 27 billets

#eurovision - 26 billets

#bad buddy series - 19 billets

#esc - 18 billets

#not me spoilers - 16 billets

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#but also what kind of life are you living where stranding on a deserted island is only the second most interesting that ever happened to yo

Mes billets vedette en 2022 :

n°5

okay aber WER läuft mit mir zusammen durch den monsun

337 notes - publié le 1 mars 2022

n°4

Th.. there's a Dutch Spoon Discourse?

Yes my friend. Even most Dutch-speakers aren’t aware of this. But once two people holding opposing views on spoons get into the discussion, blood may flow.

All of these things are some type of spoon in Dutch.

Ask a Dutch person to name these spoons and they would say, from left to right: 1. koffie- of theelepel 2. pollepel 3. soeplepel 4. eetlepel

Ask a Belgian the same question you get:

1. koffie- of theelepel 2. houten lepel 3. pollepel 4. soep- of eetlepel

Now concerning the first spoon, the problem isn’t so much that we can’t agree on what it’s called because we both use the terms interchangeably. The problem is that is that no one actually knows what it is. Is there a difference between a teaspoon and a coffeespoon? If a recipe calls for a coffeespoon, can i just use any small spoon, surely not all small spoons contain the same volume of liquid? (I don’t know what’s going on but i know the French are to blame)

The last spoon can cause a bit of confusion, because an unsuspecting Belgian who asks for a soeplepel for their spaghetti at a Dutch restaurant will get a very strange look from the waiter, and the Belgian will assume they’re being judged for eating spaghetti with a spoon. Hopefully the waiter will ask for clarification, but sometimes the waiter will either refuse because it’s an extremely weird request, or, in funnier cases, he will bring a ladle. But those who know about the discrepancy in meaning across the border, and don’t wanna cause problems on purpose, will use “eetlepel”, because this variant is accepted on both sides of the border.

Now it’s really the two middle spoons who are problematic. “Pollepel” is a wooden spoon to the Dutch and a ladle to the Belgians. Both sides are relentless. There is no possibility of compromise, no acceptable alternative. There is a hill nearly every Dutch-speaker will die on and it’s called pollepel.

Luckily this problem only poses itself in a kitchen setting. So mostly only mixed couples or college roommates and cooks in restaurant near the border have to deal with this on the regular. That’s also why this discourse is not common knowledge. People will go through most of their adult lives without every encountering this issue. Which makes it all the more shocking when they eventually do.

There you have it folks. This is the spoon discourse. For my followers who are trying to learn Dutch: i’m so sorry.

397 notes - publié le 12 janvier 2022

n°3

i thought "wifebeater" was the most unnecessary violent name for a piece of clothing one could think of but the germans are proving me wrong again

670 notes - publié le 15 juin 2022

n°2

if you told an emo kid in 2007 that the lead singer of their favorite band would one day perform in a cheerleader outfit, the ultimate prep uniform, they would have hissed and put up their middle finger at you

703 notes - publié le 25 août 2022

Mon billet n°1 en 2022

god i'm so glad i saw the original slug tweet yesterday. this site is never incomprehensible if you're just online 24/7

14 137 notes - publié le 3 mars 2022

Obtenez votre année 2022 en revue sur Tumblr →

[lost-dreamers-system]

Thinking about the version of me that existed when we were younger and how funny it is that he's Daithi and I'm Dafydd. (Roz's mother's family is Irish/German and he became briefly obsessed with Welsh alt-rock for a few years) And I'm a goth and he's an emo. The fact that we have two Davids in here who are both parts of post punk alt subcultures...

I don't know why it's so funny to me but it really is. It would be even funnier if there were enough of Daithi left for him to be an alter (again?). Just because...

We've actually been wondering if our past comfort characters may have been headmates -- because I feel really similar in... psychic texture as Daithi's muse. But that might just be because I'm a projection of the changeling version of Roz's teenage self combined with the Lost Boys and Sandman Chronicles a bit. Huh. I guess I identify with the Lost Boys a lot. Like , from Peter Pan. Makes sense as a Changeling.

Anyway uh -- that might just because Daithi and I are both made up of experiences from that time period.

[we proceed to get distracted and Daffodil stops fronting]

Uhhhh I don't know what he was talking about at this point. Something like about my much older characters )the ones from my teens) being old headmates???

That would make sense, actually. Like, a lot of the headmates now feel similar to ones we've had in the past.