#what happened to tulisa

[herinfluencerdeer]

Tulisa Contostavlos: Why I’m a Celebrity 2024 contestant left the spotlight after The X Factor.

The N-Dubz singer has faced several obstacles in the last 10 years

Read more....

[mcflysohigh]

Non Danny related post for a sec - Tulisa not showing up to unpacked and deleting all traces of the show from socials is a tad wild.. 👀

[annabawritersdream]

For the fic tropes ask: fake dating/pretend relationship

Thank you for the ask! 🙂 I haven't written a fake dating/pretend relationship yet, but I could definitely write it and I have actually thought of two OCs that would be perfect to write into this scenario. Let me introduce you to them (I actually love these two).

Tulisa

She's originally from the Blackroot Vale. Her mother was a prominent highborn and one of the most beautiful ladies in the fief. She was originally supposed to marry its lord, but she was accused of practicing witchcraft and participating in rituals reminiscent of those of the old days of Númenor (when Sauron corrupted Ar-Phârazon and everybody started adoring Morgoth and sacrificing people). As a result, her betrothal was called off and the lord of the Blackroot Vale married someone from the Ringló Vale. (I headcanon that the two Vales have somewhat of a rivalry going on and the fact that her intended married someone from the opposing side caused a major scandal and was a major blow to both her reputation and her family's.) She of course never participated in any weird ritual; she was just more knowledgeable than others in medicine and had read books that were usually meant for those working in the Houses of Healing. She was basically interested in science and people made up horrible lies so that the marriage wouldn't take place.

As the news of her rejection on the lord’s part spread rapidly through Gondor—news of this kind travels fast and Gondorians would never miss an opportunity to gossip about others, demean them and be happy about someone's downfall—she was forced to settle for a minor noble who did not love her and whose family did not approve of her. She quickly got pregnant, but the birth was traumatic and she suffered injuries who left her unable to have any more children in the years that followed. Therefore, Tulisa is her only daughter and the apple of her eye. On the other hand, her father never really cared for her because “she's not a son” (usual Gondorian stuff). He completely neglects and essentially doesn't care whether she's alive or dead. She's completely useless to him and he makes it known at any chance he gets. It is Tulisa’s mother who takes care of her, which is highly unusual. Though her father isn't massively influential in the grand scheme of things, he IS a noble and nobles almost always have a whole array of servants doing things for them. That is most certainly not the case with Tulisa and her mother. The latter took an active role in her daughter’s education and taught her everything she knows. As such, Tulisa is an extremely well-mannered person, kind and very shy. She doesn't talk much, both because she is looked down upon wherever she goes (because of what happened to her both) and because she has a secret that no one knows about. She's aro/ace. I don't think it will be explicitly mentioned in the story but she definitely is. While all of her fellow ladies always had crushes on people, she never experienced them and, for a long time, she thought she had never fallen in love because she simply had not met the right person. That was before she ultimately realized she seemed unable to understand romance (she was puzzled by the concept) and downright disgusted by sexual things to the point of throwing up. She mentioned this to her mother—luckily her absentee, crappy father died early—and, after a lengthy discussion with her, her mother (I still have to think of a name for her, but she's too cool to remain unnamed and too cool not to have her own faceclaim) reaches out to her childhood friend Finduilas (Lady of Lamedon and Ithilien).

Finduilas, who is far more open-minded than most Gondorians, knows the truth about Tulisa and thinks nothing of it, and it is through her that the most suitable candidate for marriage is found, although it is basically just a lucky coincidence. Since marrying Faramir, Finduilas has grown quite close with Imrahil and his family. I headcanon Imrahil and Angbor are/were close friends and Imrahil is very happy at the idea that Faramir married a “proper woman” (he didn't dislike Éowyn altogether, but thought she was not fit for his nephew. His whole attitude was “look, nephew, I don't hate your wife but you could have done SO MUCH better.” Which is kind of ironic since he's the one who saves her at the Pelennor Fields. He admired her a whole lot…before she married into the family).

Anyway, Finduilas is particularly close to Imrahil’s boys and, since she trusts them, she tells them about Tulisa and they unanimously agree that they have the right person for her. And that's where Daron comes in.

Daron

He's originally from Dor-en-Ernil, which is under the jurisdiction of Dol Amroth, so basically…he's from Dol Amroth. He's close friends with Elphir, Erchirion and Amrothos, the four of them grew up together. He's son of one of the Swan Knights; a knight of whom Imrahil was so fond Aragorn created him a lord upon his request (he probably saved Imrahil and a bunch of other people in battle). Daron is well-liked by Imrahil and was raised alongside his children. The four of them were inseparable and went on many adventures together, all kinds of adventures. This is when Imrahil's boys started realizing he didn't like girls…that way. Naturally, they assumed he would like boys. Not really. At one of point ( I think after getting drunk because he would not have mustered enough courage to admit it while sober) he tells them that he thinks there might be something wrong with him. He says that he does like girls, he has crushes on them but cannot bring himself to actually have sex with them.

It's like the initial attraction he feels suddenly fizzles out once he's confronted with the idea of getting down to business (he's ace). Imrahil's boys initially worry about him (they think he has an illness/disease of some kind and then they even suggest he might be mentally unwell due to some kind of trauma he has not shared with them. Once they get over the news, they actually find the whole thing kind of funny and switch to friendly teasing, which Daron finds super annoying).

Daron and Tulisa first meet at Emyn Arnen since Tulisa is one of Enna’s students at her “finishing school” (yes, I know it's not a concept that exists in Middle-earth but it's basically a charity project she comes up with that aims to help both girls who cannot afford an education and established ladies who may want to further their social connections. As Tulisa is extremely shy, her mother and Finduilas hope that she may meet some friends and so they “enroll” her there a few years prior to her wedding (the wedding of course wasn't planned yet since it was a last minute thing). Enna is intrigued by her but respects her boundaries so their conversations are sporadic (when they talk though, they do talk about very interesting things and Enna appreciates her politeness and fine manners. She has her stamp of approval, basically.)

Enna of course asks her if she intends to marry and Tulisa very diplomatically answers that she hasn't thought about it and Enna immediately starts looking around for potential suitors. As she finds no one Tulisa is interested in, she asks her stepmom for help and, upon learning that Finduilas may have found the right person, she sets up a meeting after consulting with Elphir, Erchirion and Amrothos. Daron is floored by her (although he doesn't want her sexually, he thinks she's the most beautiful woman he's ever seen) and they're soon married after getting to know one another a bit and learning they have many things in common.

Their relationship is great. They're besties, they read together, discuss politics and current events together. Daron is sort of an astronomer and they stargaze together and take on their respective hobbies. If they have children, they'll probably adopt a little girl or boy and they'll live as a happy family splitting their time between Ithilien and Dol Amroth.

That's it about these two! You could say theirs is pretty much a pretend relationship in the beginning and technically it is no marriage since I headcanon that a couple must produce legitimate children for the wedding to be accepted and legalized, but they're much happier than all of the Gondorians put together!

I would definitely consider writing them into the story (I definitely will) and I hope readers love them as much as I do!

Faceclaims:

Saadet Aksoy as Tulisa (Sadika hatun from Magnificent Century)

&

Gethin Anthony as Daron (Renly Baratheon from Game of Thrones)

That's it! Thank you again for asking!

[gurutrends]

Fiery' Coleen Rooney tipped for 'fireworks' with popstar Tulisa in I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here as wife of Man Utd legend Wayne Rooney is picked out as key celebrity to watch in hit ITV show

WHAT HAPPENED? The wife of Plymouth manager and ex-Manchester United star Wayne Rooney is set to enter the jungle in Australia to feature in the ITV programme, and body language and behavioural expert Darren Stanton, who also believes Coleen looks “terrified” ahead of the adventure, expects her to be an entertaining addition. Disney+ Screening of “Coleen Rooney: The Real Wagatha Story” in…

[markowensmile]

The Spotlight - Chapter 4 (A Gary Barlow FanFiction)

I step behind the bar, my movements practiced and efficient after years of working in this lively pub. The familiar scent of beer and laughter fills the air as I grab a clean rag and start wiping down the polished wood surface.

The door swings open, and a burst of radiance enters the room in the form of my best friend, Emily. Her face is alight with a wide grin, and I can't help but match her infectious smile as she slides onto a bar stool.

"Alright, Em? You look like the cat that got the cream," I tease, leaning forward on my elbows. Emily's eyes sparkle with excitement, and she leans in conspiratorially. "Rye, you'll never guess what I just saw!"

I raise an eyebrow, my curiosity piqued. "Go on, then. Don't leave me hanging."

"I was scrolling through YouTube, and your X Factor audition popped up!" she gushes, her words tumbling out in a rush. "Oh my god, Riley, you were incredible! The way you sang 'A Million Love Songs'—it gave me chills!"

My cheeks flush at the memory of standing on that stage, the bright lights beating down on me as I poured my heart into Gary Barlow's passionate lyrics. The nerves had threatened to consume me as I first started singing, but the music took over, and I poured out all my emotions. "You really think so?" I ask, a hint of doubt creeping into my voice. "I was so nervous, I thought the judges were going to notice."

Emily waves a dismissive hand. "Are you kidding me? You had the judges eating out of the palm of your hand! Tulisa and Nicole were swooning, and Louis was screaming your name!" A small smile tugs at the corners of my mouth as I recall the judges' reactions.

"And Gary!" Emily continues, her voice rising with excitement. "Did you see the look on his face? He was gobsmacked, Rye! Absolutely gobsmacked that you sang his song better than he does!" I can't help but laugh at the memory of Gary's playful jab, his eyes twinkling with a mixture of awe and amusement. In that moment, I felt a connection with the music legend—a shared understanding of the power that a well-crafted song can hold.

"I still can't believe it happened," I admit, shaking my head in disbelief. "One minute, I was just a girl working in a pub, and the next, I was standing on that stage, pouring my heart out to the world."

Emily reaches across the bar and gives my hand a gentle squeeze. "You deserve this, Rye. You've worked so hard over the years, and your talent is undeniable. This is just the beginning."

I nod, a small smile playing on my lips as Emily's words sink in. She's right, of course. This is just the beginning—a new chapter in my life that I never could have imagined unfolding. But at the mention of Gary's name, I feel a flush creeping up my cheeks, and a familiar flutter takes root in my chest.

Memories of that fateful audition come flooding back, vivid and intense. The bright lights beating down on me, the weight of the judges' scrutinizing gazes, and then... his eyes. Gary Barlow's strong gaze locked with mine as I poured every ounce of emotion into his song. Quickly, I compose myself, pushing the memory aside and focusing on the present. Emily is watching me with a knowing smile, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Alright, alright," I concede, reaching beneath the counter for a clean glass. "Let's have a celebratory drink!"

I grasp the bottle of Emily's favorite red wine, the cool glass slipping against my palms. With ease, I uncork the bottle and tilt it, allowing the rich, ruby liquid to cascade into the glass. As I set the glass down on the polished wood surface, I couldn't help but feel a sense of pride swelling in my chest. This is just the beginning, and who knows where this adventure might lead? Perhaps one day I'll find myself sharing a stage with the likes of Gary Barlow, our voices intertwining in perfect harmony.

For now, though, I'll savor this moment—a quiet celebration with my best friend, toasting to the endless possibilities that lie ahead.

We click our glasses together. "To new beginnings!" We exclaim.

The rich, burgundy liquid swirls invitingly, and I take a sip, savoring the bold, fruity notes that dance across my tongue.

Emily beams at me from across the bar, her hazel eyes sparkling with pride. "I always knew you had it in you, Rye," she says, using my nickname. "That performance was bloody brilliant. I know Brendan would be proud of you." 

The mention of Brendan's name hits me like a punch to the gut, my heart clenching painfully in my chest. A lump forms in my throat as a tidal wave of memories threatens to crash over me. I grip the edge of the bar, my knuckles turning white, struggling to maintain my composure. Emily's face falls, instantly recognizing the shift in my demeanor. "Rye? What's wrong?"

I shake my head, unable to find the words. How can I explain the depths of emotion that a single name evokes? Brendan was...is...everything to me. My rock. My confidant. My best friend. Flashes of our childhood dance behind my eyes. The way his infectious laugh would fill our tiny flat. How he'd ruffle my hair and call me "Squirt," despite me being the taller one. The countless nights we'd stay up talking about our dreams, our hopes, and our fears. 

A sharp pang of loss pierces my heart. So much was left unsaid. There are so many moments we'll never get to share, like my audition.

I blink rapidly, desperate to hold back the tears that sting my eyes. Emily reaches across the bar, her warm hand covering mine in a gentle squeeze.

"Hey," she murmurs. "It's okay. I miss him too."

Drawing in a shaky breath, I offer her a tremulous smile. "I know. It just...doesn't stop hurting"

Her gaze fills with understanding and empathy. Emily has been my lifeline through the darkest of days, a steady presence when the world seemed to crumble beneath my feet.

I try to focus on the cozy atmosphere of the pub around us. The low hum of conversation is punctuated by laughter and the occasional clink of glasses. The warm, amber glow of the Edison bulbs overhead casts a soft, inviting light. This place has been my sanctuary for so long. I've been working here since I was 18 and alone. It became a haven where I could lose myself in the rhythm of pouring drinks and the familiar banter with regulars.

This bar that once served as my haven now feels like a weight holding me back from the potential path my life could take after auditioning for the X Factor.

"I still can't believe you signed me up for that audition," I say, shaking my head in disbelief. "When you told me, I thought you were taking the piss."

Emily throws her head back, her infectious laughter filling the space between us. "Oh, come on! You know I'd never joke about something like that." She leans forward conspiratorially, her voice dropping to a mock whisper. "Besides, did you see the way Gary was looking at you?"

Heat rushes to my cheeks again, and I quickly avert my gaze, suddenly very interested in wiping down the already spotless counter. Emily knows me too well, and she lets out another peal of laughter at my reaction.

"Don't even try to deny it, missy," she teases. "I'm your best friend! I saw that little spark between you two. You were bloody smitten!"

I roll my eyes, but I can't quite suppress the giddy smile that tugs at the corners of my mouth. It's true—there was something undeniably electric in the way Gary's intense gaze had locked with mine during that performance. It was as if he could see straight into the depths of my soul through the lyrics of his song.

The memory sends a delicious shiver down my spine, and I quickly take another sip of wine to steady myself.

"Alright, alright," I concede, holding up my hands in mock surrender. "Maybe there was a little... spark there. But let's not get ahead of ourselves, yeah?"

Emily arches an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced, but she doesn't press the issue further. Instead, she raises her glass once more, her expression softening into one of genuine affection. "To Riley Scott," she says, her voice thick with emotion. "The most talented, kind-hearted, and deserving person I know. This is just the start, babe. The world better get ready because you're about to take it by storm."

Our glasses meet again with a gentle clink, and I take another sip of the rich wine. Later that night, I settle onto my worn but cozy couch, my feet tucked beneath me as I clutch my phone in anticipation. The soft glow of the screen casts a warm hue across my face, and I can't help but smile as I scroll through the various clips, searching for glimpses of the man who has unexpectedly captured my imagination.

With a few taps, a familiar figure appears on the screen: Gary Barlow, his presence commanding even through the digital interface. I lean in closer, my eyes drinking in every detail as if I were seeing him for the first time.

The footage is from an old X Factor episode, and Gary is seated alongside the other judges, his posture relaxed yet exuding an air of confidence that is both captivating and disarming. As a contestant takes the stage, Gary's expression shifts, his brow furrowing in concentration as he leans forward, his gaze intense and focused.

But then something magical happens. The contestant, a young man with infectious energy, launches into his performance, and Gary's demeanor transforms. A broad grin spreads across his face, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he nods along to the beat, clearly delighted by the display unfolding before him.

It's in these moments that I catch a glimpse of the Gary Barlow I find myself drawn to—the one who exists beyond the polished veneer of stardom. The man who can't help but be swept up in the sheer joy of music, his entire being radiating an infectious enthusiasm that is both endearing and utterly captivating.

As the performance reaches its crescendo, Gary leans back in his chair, his head thrown back in unabashed laughter, his hands clapping in a rhythm all their own. It's a side of him I've never witnessed before—a raw, unguarded moment that speaks volumes about the depth of his passion and the genuine warmth that lies beneath his public persona.

I find myself mirroring his smile, my laughter bubbling forth as I watch him engage in playful banter with the contestant, their exchange filled with good-natured ribbing and an easy camaraderie that is utterly infectious.

In that moment, I realized that this is the Gary Barlow I want to know—the one who isn't afraid to let his guard down and embrace the pure, unadulterated joy of music and performance. He is the one who can command a stage with his presence yet still maintain a sense of humility and approachability that draws people in like moths to a flame.

As the clip ends and transitions to another, I find myself eagerly scrolling through, my eyes hungrily devouring every moment and every fleeting glimpse into the man behind the legend. Each performance, each interaction, peels back another layer, revealing a depth and complexity that only serve to deepen my fascination.

And as I watch, I can't help but imagine what it would be like to share that stage with him, to bask in the warmth of his infectious energy, and to feed off the electric connection that seems to crackle between us. To have him look at me with that same intensity, that same unbridled passion, and to know that in that moment, we are united by the very thing that breathes life into our souls—the power of music.

I quickly shake my head, forcing myself back to reality. 

I stare at my phone, my thumb hovering over the YouTube app icon. A part of me is desperate to search for the video of my X Factor audition. But another part of me hesitates, a nagging voice in the back of my mind whispering warnings about the potential pitfalls of such an endeavor. It's no secret that the internet can be a cruel and unforgiving place, a vast expanse where anonymous trolls lurk, ready to unleash their bitterness and criticism upon anyone brave enough to put themselves out there. As someone who has always struggled with self-doubt and anxiety, the thought of subjecting myself to that kind of scrutiny is almost paralyzing.

I can already envision the comments, the harsh critiques, and the scathing remarks that would inevitably find their way onto the video. "She's not even that good," they'd say, their words dripping with disdain. "Who does she think she is, trying to make it on a show like that?" And then there would be the personal attacks—the low blows aimed at my appearance, my mannerisms, anything and everything that they could use as ammunition to tear me down. It's a scenario that plays out time and time again—a cruel reality that so many artists and performers have to face in this digital age.

But even as those thoughts swirl through my mind, a part of me can't help but wonder—what if the comments aren't all negative? What if there are people out there who were genuinely moved by my performance and who saw something in me that resonated with them on a deeper level? I think back to that moment on stage—the way the judges' faces lit up as I sang, the way Gary's eyes seemed to sparkle with a mixture of surprise and delight. Could it be possible that there were others in the audience, or even watching from home, who felt that same passion, that same spark of recognition?

And then there's the undeniable allure of seeing myself through the lens of a camera, of witnessing my performance from an outsider's perspective. Perhaps it would offer a new level of insight, and a chance to critique and analyze my strengths and weaknesses in a way that could help me grow and improve as a competitor.

But still, the fear lingers—that nagging voice whispering that it's not worth the risk and that the potential for hurt and humiliation is simply too great.

In the end, I decided to err on the side of caution, at least for now. I exit the YouTube app, setting my phone aside and taking a deep breath. For now, I'll focus on the positive, on the memories of that incredible night, and on the validation I felt from the judges.

Because at the end of the day, their opinions are the ones that truly matter—the ones that could potentially open doors and pave the way for a future in music that I've only dared to dream about since I was young. And as long as I hold onto that, as long as I keep that flame of passion burning bright within me, no amount of negative comments or cruel words can extinguish it.

So I'll tuck those memories away, a precious treasure to be revisited and cherished, and I'll continue to move forward, one step at a time, towards a future that is still unwritten and full of endless possibilities.

I'm sitting on my worn couch, absentmindedly strumming my guitar, when my phone starts buzzing incessantly on the coffee table. I frown, setting the instrument aside and reaching for the device. An unknown number flashes across the screen, and I hesitate for a moment before swiping to answer.

"Hello?" My voice is laced with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension.

"Riley Scott?" The voice on the other end is crisp and professional, immediately putting me on edge.

"Yes, this is her," I reply, my heart rate already starting to quicken.

"This is Samantha Wilkins, one of the producers for The X Factor," she says, and I feel my breath catch in my throat. "I'm calling to invite you to a little celebration we're hosting for all the contestants who made it through boot camp. It's a chance for you all to mingle, get to know each other, and get everyone excited for a life that could happen if you win!"

"That sounds fun," I state. "When and where is it?"

Samantha rattles off the details, and I quickly jot them down on a nearby notepad. The party is scheduled for the end of the week, giving me just a few days to mentally prepare myself.

[macybeckham7]

Confetti

Part One

10 Years of Little Mix! If anyone told that 15 year old that was shaking on the stage infront of Kelly Rowland, Tulisa, Gary Barlow and Louis Walsh that she was in fact going to be apart of the first girl band to win the show. Gain four best friends, your sisters and go on for 10 long years. She would of probably told them to fuck off.

I had grown up with the four girls, we learnt our worth, we travelled around the world and saw corners of the Earth that I dreamt about seeing. They had seen me through my first love, first heartbreak, the first time I got followed by the paparazzi (which still feels odd to me). We wrote love songs, girl anthems to get over the guy that wasn't the shit. The women I have become today was all thanks to them. Having them on your side makes you think you could conquer anything. We got through those nervous butterflies before shows, just looking at your sisters on the stage and dancing silly with them, will always be the most incredible feeling in the world.

If I was being honest I wasn't ready for the hiatus, there was a lot of tears. It felt like it was going to happen. With Jesy leaving, for her health. It ended on good terms and then it turned sour (but lets not talk about it). Then Leigh and Perrie had kids and it was obvious that they wanted to focus on being mothers.

'Are we really doing this?' Perrie asks looking at each of the girls. Jade takes your hands and nods.

'You are always going to be my sisters, no one can change that' Leigh says as you all hug each other in a little huddle.

You looked around at the girls. The history couldn't get changed and that will always be engraved in our hearts. The present is now and I promised myself that I was going to hang onto everyone lasting moment, as we don't know what the future is going to have in hold for us.

After a long day at the office with the girls and the management, you find yourself pulling up at your exes house. You see the curtains move as he peers out the window. You sit there looking at him, wondering if he would be happy to see you. You and Trent have been pretty much on and off throughout the years. You had met him through Ox, and often went on some double dates. But the last time you saw him was after the UCL, everyone beaming at the four of you on the pitch and celebrating. You and Perrie couldn't look anymore proud of your boys.

He opens the door and waits till you get out the car, he notices your bottom lip quivering and you were close to tears. 'What's happened?' he says softly, his accent still thick.

You hug him tightly as you take in your favourite scent, if you could just bottle it up, that would make you feel safe even with a scary storm outside. He takes you inside the house and you both talk for hours, you tell him everything that was happening with Little Mix, and how lost you felt and how scared you were about the future.

'Whatever you end up doing, I know you will be amazing' he says softly as you cuddle into him. Just being around him always made you feel a little bit more at ease.

You both end up staying on the sofa and sleeping in one another's arms, it wasn't until you got woken up by Perrie and Alex that you realised that you had fallen asleep. He told you that he was still single, telling you that it wasn't for a lack of trying, he told you that you just had cursed and haunted him. 'I can't stop thinking, she is good and all but she isn't YN'. He told you that he didn't want to be with anyone else if it wasn't you. The two of you broke up, because you got in your head and you believed he deserved someone who would be more present in his life. You hated having to leave him at home, when he was injured because you had to shows.

'Oh hello YN' Alex smiles. 'If I knew you were here I would of brought you breakfast too' he says as Trent gratefully takes the coffee they brought him.

'No worries' you smile. You stand up and walk to the kitchen, with Perrie hot on your heels. 'Promise me one thing?' she says. You nod. 'You need to make this work with Trent' she whispers.

You both look at Trent and Alex who were in a full wrestling match with each other.

'You deserve to be happy' she says hugging you and giving you a peck on the cheek. 'Now come on, we have to be at the studio' she says looking at her phone.

........

You were on the Graham Norton Show, you were stood in the middle of Leigh and Jade. You had to stop the recording as you couldn't get through the song without crying. This was how you were going to announce it to your fans. You let out a deep breath as the music restarts and you start the song, you keep your eyes closed as you refused to look at them. Between Us was a song for each other, for our loyal mixers.

You all sit down as Graham says the word 'hiatus' you look at Jade with both your eyes tear up.

'It's been amazing 10 years, its time to venture out and do things on our own for a bit' Perrie says.

The next 24 hours was such an outer body experience, you looked on your socials of all your fans thanking you for the memories and what the songs you wrote did to them. When you were out with Trent (you are dating him again) they would come over and hug you, you nearly crying all over their shoulders. You loved meeting your fans, you felt butterflies in your stomach as you think if they were will be like this with you. Or would they just be supporting Perrie, Jade and Leigh-Anne. Did they like you? Or was you just apart of the band of girls that they liked more?

The tickets go on sale and they get sold out within minutes, your group chat was popping up constantly as your management was giving you updates. #DoWeNeedThisHiatus kept popping up from Perrie.

You would facetime the girls as you start to speak about the songs that should be in the line up. Originally this was supposed to be the Confetti tour but now it was the best hits of the 10 years, and there is a lot.

'What is your favourite song to perform?' Trent asks as he stand to the side in the kitchen making your dinner.

'Joan Arc' both you and Jade say in unison.

-------

'How would I describe our little YNN?' Jade smiles at the camera for the At Home docuseries.

'YN is a little ray of sunshine, I don't think she actually realises how powerful she is, a powerful women and she has so much talent in her little finger' Leigh beams.

'It has been a pleasure to watch her grow, because this goddess that she is now, and the crazy thing is that she gets off the stage most times and is like I could of done that better, and we look at her like she is crazy because she smashes her vocals all the time!' Perrie says, pulling a face.

[bisluthq]

Yeah no it's crazy how Little Mix was put together in bootcamp bc it's true that a lot of what was broadcasted on X-Factor was staged but what actually happened was that the contestants were put in groups to see if they worked and Leigh and Jade were in one group with another girl and Perrie and Jesy were in another group with two other girls. None of those two groups got through but as it happens, Jesy had become friends with Leigh and Jade at the begginning of the bootcamp before they were split into groups and they overheard Perrie singing in the hallways and thought "damn she's really good" so they went to speak to her and Jade was like "you're Perrie from South Shields right" bc she's from South Shields too. So the four girls had become friends and the judges sort of knew the dynamics amongst the contestants by the end of the bootcamp. So when neither of those two groups got through, Kelly Rowland was like "I feel like we don't have a proper girl group to bring into the competition" so she took Leigh and Jade from one group and Perrie and Jesy from the other. The other judges agreed bc they'd already heard all four sing ibdividually and knew they were quite good. In more recent interviews, the girls have said that it was in part bc they were all short and around the same height so they looked aesthically matched for television and stuff lol but Kelly and Tulisa had heard the four singing together in bootcamp and knew their voices blended excellently for harmonies.

But yeah, all four were from working class backgrounds and sometimes I think ab how Jade almost didn't go bc she'd already tried once before and Perrie said that her parents had begged her to go audition for ages bc she sang around the house since she was little and they could tell she was good, but she wouldn't do it bc she felt shy singing in front of ppl. But that year an iPhone (probs the 1st or 2nd idk) came out and she begged her mum to buy it to her and her mum was like "ok, if you go audition for X-Factor I'll get you the iPhone" and so she did it lmao 💀😭Little Mix might've never happened

That’s dope.

[dgchg]

his eyes and horns and spinal plates blood red

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He cannot see me, Bran realized, despairing. And by the nike jean jacket time I finished the rest of my 40, I'd be ready for my next 40. The event evolved into Esquimalt Days and eventually, in 1966, Buccaneer Days.More than 20 community organizations will take part in the celebrations. biciclete rusesti vechi You can look for shoes with thick and superior sole. It was a wet, dismal night; he made a fire in his cabin, went to get his supper, and found ocular demonstration of the guilt of his master. “Your Grace,” said Selmy, “Eddard Stark played a part in your father’s fall, but he bore you no ill will. Camo Form comes in 10 camo patterns and black, so it might be a good idea to get a few rolls of a couple different colors.. You would do well to remember that.”. It has a Tilt Steering Wheel. Hotah paid more note to those who did not drink: Ser Daemon Sand, Lord Tremond Gargalen, the Fowler twins, Dagos Manwoody, the Ullers of the Hellholt, the Wyls of the Boneway. It was Beacham Leonard who had known me all my life. Her dragons had grown too large to be content with rats and cats and dogs.. One of the easiest ways to marinate a turkey is by using kimono long femme grande taille a needle like injector. Vstra Gtaland County is on the western coast and includes the second largest city in Sweden, Gothenburg; it hanorace panda barbati had a population of 1.6 million people in early 2015, with a population density of 68/km2. The hills were warmer where they were, and full of food. Hotah paid more note to those who did not drink: Ser Daemon Sand, Lord Tremond Gargalen, the Fowler twins, Dagos Manwoody, the Ullers of the Hellholt, the Wyls of the Boneway. He swallowed, and said, “Some men say there is wisdom in wine. Backs_Tre Roberts, Grove City Christian, 5 11, 185, sr.; Luke Dillahunt, Troy Christian, 5 11, 180, jr.; Austin Rettig, Arlington, 6 0, 190, sr.; Travis Pickering, Ashland Mapleton, 6 0, 185, sr. The owner is hereby notified to come forward, prove property pay charges, &c.. The poor womens ray ban eyeglasses girl was surrounded in a moment; angry faces and shrill coach outlet stores voices met her on every side; the most insolent questions, oakley mp3 the most extravagant accusations, assailed her; and not one word ray ban eyeglasses for men that she could say in her own defense was listened ray ban new wayfarer rb2132 to for an instant. His scales were black, his eyes and horns and spinal plates blood red. I don know what it is about me. Each day, will provide valuable information about bokacsizma bakancs mental health and related behavioral challenges in children and adolescents, according to a press release. Opposing starter Conner Greene (3 4) took the loss in the Eastern League game after a rough outing in which he allowed six runs and nine hits over 51/3 innings.. A red sun rose and set and rose again, painting the snows in shades of rose and pink. He will be sadly missed by his adidas mariposas wife of 19 years Fern (McEwing); sons Ross (Shelley); John (Nellie); Paul (Heidi); step daughters Lori McDougall (Ren); Janice McDougall (Tony); his 13 grandchildren; mother in law Ruth McEwing as well as many nieces and nephews.. This could possibly give a too conservative vibe. As his crew gathered, whispering and trading glances, he raised a charred and blackened hand. If it were only possible (which, however, from the laws of human nature never can be possible), if it were possible for every one of us to describe all his secret thoughts, without hesitating to disclose what he is afraid to tell and would not on any account tell other people, what he is afraid to tell his best friends, what, indeed, he is even at times afraid маратонки puma mercedes amg to confess to himself, the world would be filled with such a stench that we should all be suffocated. I have said it before, but professional wrestling, executed property, is the greatest of the performance arts. She was not all wrong. Even the ones I was wearing when I had this sandal revelation were all black with thin, sophisticated black straps and an abalone adidas mariposas look centerpiece shoes befitting a woman of my advanced age.. 90):. The High Sparrow had promised her that much.. Combine that with your aerobic exercise and fat afire foods, and you bequeath enhance a very fit myself with a close toned body. But Brown said the biggest blow came in 2007 when her mother, Mary Brown, died of an accidental drug overdose.. Zeti has been an important figure in driving the growth of Islamic finance, not just in Malaysia but also in other parts of Asia, as well having an influential role in the debate to establish common standards of what is considered Shari'ah (Islamic law) compliant. Shoppers hit stores and websites at record numbers over the Thanksgiving weekend, according to a survey released by the National Retail Federation on Sunday. His new Unsullied are an obscene jape. A recent study at the University of Toronto showed that teams playing group sports had better overall mental health and less stress. Derry, Ashley and Andrew entered solo and were put into a group with two other contestants, who Tulisa replaced with Charlie. I had that happen the other night with a project that was just fine minutes before. Braavos would have suited me better, but Lynesse wanted someplace warm. The actual distinct factor that we are able to provide with the technology of using the electrodes is that we make sure that moderate execution is taking place.. Also enjoy strolls through the art galleries, an Asian inspired fashion show and copious food and drinks. It was thrice the size of his captain’s cabin on Black Bessa, and even larger than the cabin Salladhor Saan enjoyed on his Valyrian. She would not see them either. More than that. Part One: Millennium Approaches will be captured live and broadcast to cinemas on Thursday, July 20 and Part Two: Perestroika will be captured lived and broadcast to cinemas on Thursday, July 27.. Upon this announcement, the audience cheered loudly. But only in the royal tent. And for the rest of that long night they let her sleep.

[starksinthenorth]

If jon didn't bend the knee in the show to Daenerys, what would have happened? Because Daenerys already agreed to help with the WW... Would they have negotiated an alliance or for sovereignty in exchange for backing her?

Dany was true to her word and meant that she was going to fight the WW even before Jon made his promise to her to bend the knee. At the Dragonpit meeting when Cersei asks Jon not to take up arms against the south, Jon is faced with a much more ethical dilemma: does he promise not to fight Cersei or does he lose her support in the fight against the WW? 

That question is also phrased in a really interesting way that makes me wish he hadn’t made a promise to Dany, just so it could have been explored more. In a better world, I know it would’ve been. Cersei says:

I ask it only of Ned Stark's son. I know Ned Stark's son will be true to his word.

But is this true? Consider: 

Robb Stark’s death happened because he, Ned Stark’s actual, biological son and heir, was not true to his word. He promised himself to a Frey girl and then married Tulisa Maegyr / Jeyne Westerling instead.

Jon is not Ned Stark’s son in the end

So, we have two plot lines that would’ve been more interesting to explore. First, what does Jon do? In the actual Dragonpit scene linked above, he looks to Dany and she seems to nod. Later, she tells him he could’ve lied. Jon could easily have said something along the lines of “I will not bear arms against the Lannisters so long as they do not give cause for the North to raise arms against them.” As someone who believes Dany is sane and politically astute, I think she’ll understand he did this in favor of the final threat. Also, she has dragons, the Unsullied, and the Dothraki. It’s not like it’s that hard for her to destroy Cersei’s armies.

Next, and most interesting: what about when Jon is discovered to be Rhaegar’s son? Does the North stick by him? Does this news become public? What about his competing claim with Dany? The politically smart thing to do is to marry the two, making his kingdom and hers the same. Notably, Cersei didn’t say the North won’t fight her, just the King in the North. If he’s King Targaryen, he isn’t King in the North anymore. And if Dany does what my heart wants her to and continues to recognize the independence of the North despite her consort being from there, then Queen Sansa or King Bran can choose to fight the Lannisters without a problem. Maybe as part of the marriage pact?

Either way, the final season plot should’ve focused more on ice zombies than on politics because that’s kind of the point of A Song of Ice and Fire, and any canonical universe were Cersei or Dany is the final Big Bad is not really interesting to me.

[littlemixnet]

Little Mix's Jesy Nelson on surviving the trolls: 'People were saying horrific things' Eight years after she shot to fame on The X Factor, Nelson describes how she navigated the trauma of being relentlessly bullied on social media. When Jesy Nelson was 19 and working behind the bar at a pub in Dagenham, Essex, she remembers watching The X Factor on TV, and thinking: “I know I could win that.” In 2011, she did just that, as part of the girl group Little Mix – and thought: “This is the worst day of my life.” Competing in Simon Cowell’s singing contest unleashed ceaseless criticism of her appearance and weight (although rarely her voice). “All I cared about was what people were saying about me,” she says now. Winning offered no respite. When Little Mix were crowned, the first Facebook message she saw was from a stranger. It read: “You are the ugliest thing I have ever seen in my life. You do not deserve to be in this girl band, you deserve to die.” “I should have been on cloud nine,” she says. “I had Leigh-Anne [Pinnock, also of Little Mix] in my room being like: ‘This is the best!’ and I was like: ‘No, this isn’t.’” Little Mix went on to become the biggest British girl group since the Spice Girls, but Nelson was consumed by the trolling and abuse on social media. Within two years of the finale, she had depression and an eating disorder and had attempted suicide. The downward spiral and her eventual, slow recovery are the focus of an intensely personal BBC One documentary, Jesy Nelson: Odd One Out. Before shooting it, she says, she had never spoken publicly about her struggles in the spotlight. When we meet in a corner of BBC Broadcasting House in central London, Nelson, now 28, is friendly and glamorous, dressed in a double-breasted tangerine suit. It is the eighth anniversary of her X Factor debut and #8YearsofLittleMix has been trending on Twitter all morning, thanks to their fans, the “Mixers”. Within minutes of sitting down, she says that, had she known the consequences of appearing on The X Factor, she wouldn’t have done it: “I don’t think anything is worth your happiness, and it was a lot of my life that I won’t get back.” As a child growing up in Romford, Essex, Nelson was intent on becoming a performer, be it singing, dancing or acting. “I didn’t really have any reason to not be confident,” she says. In mid-2011, she auditioned for The X Factor as a solo entrant, and was eventually placed in a group with three others: Pinnock, Perrie Edwards and Jade Thirlwall, all aged between 18 and 20. Back then, social media was not as inextricably linked with reality TV as it is now. In fact, that eighth series was the first where applicants could upload their audition videos to YouTube; Nelson didn’t even know what YouTube was. She remembers being wowed when all the contestants were given new Samsung phones and told to get on Twitter to build their fanbase. On the first live show 12 weeks in, Little Mix (then Rhythmix – the name was changed later) performed Nicki Minaj’s Super Bass to gushing praise from judges Louis Walsh, Gary Barlow and their mentor Tulisa Contostavlos. It was “the best feeling in the world,” said Nelson through happy tears on stage. That night, off-camera, the contestants gathered to watch themselves on YouTube. Someone pointed out the comment section. “I was very naive,” says Nelson. “I thought it would be people giving their opinion on our performance. But nearly every comment was about the way I looked: ‘She’s a fat ugly rat’; ‘How has she got in this girl group?’; ‘How is the fat one in this?’” She remembers the air being thick with tension – “because no one knew what to do or how to react. “I felt a rush of anxiety, because I’d never experienced anything like that in my life. People were saying my face was deformed – just the most horrific things. I felt like I was heartbroken. I remember ringing my mum and saying: ‘Mum, I want to go home, I don’t want to do it.’” At about 1am, a member of The X Factor team found Nelson crying alone and asked why she was so upset. A couple of days later, she was asked to explain again – on camera. She didn’t want to do it. “They told me it wasn’t recorded, and it was.” A few weeks later, the clip of Nelson in tears over “a few nasty comments” was broadcast before Little Mix’s performance, the reality TV playbook of “sad piano” switching to upbeat pop music when Thirlwall comforts her: an uplifting moment of girl power. From then on, that was Nelson’s public narrative. She does not hold that clip, or the producers, responsible: “I think it would have always happened – that just added fuel to the fire.” From the start, relatability had been billed as a central tenet of Little Mix’s appeal. Contostavlos introduced them as “the girl group to represent ladies in this country”; she framed Nelson’s tears as evidence of Little Mix having “the same insecurities as every other girl”. Nelson, however, was the only member even remotely close to the average UK woman at size 16. Although the four bandmates have always been friends – “that’s why we’re still together” – she felt singled out. “I was with three other girls to be compared to. I don’t think it would have been as bad if I’d been on my own.” After the clip presented her as Little Mix’s weakest link, the abuse snowballed. “It was like as soon as people knew that it was really affecting me, they wanted to do it more.” Nelson had been bullied at school, to the point of stress-induced alopecia – “but this wasn’t playground stuff”. She was shocked by the cruelty from adults – some clearly parents. “Obviously everyone sits in their living room and will see someone on TV and make a comment. But to actually pick up your phone and go: ‘I’m going to make sure this girl sees it’ – even if they didn’t think I was going to see it – you have no idea the effect that one comment will have.” Nelson became “obsessed” with reading criticism. The praise didn’t register. “It only got worse when I got Twitter. And that led to the Daily Mail, and reading the [below the line] comments – the worst you can read about yourself. It was like I purposely wanted to hurt myself.” “I had a routine of waking up, going on Twitter, searching for the worst things I could about myself. I’d type in the search bar: ‘Jesy fat’, or ‘Jesy ugly’, and see what would come up. Sometimes I didn’t even need to do that, I’d just write ‘Jesy’ and then I’d see all the horrible things. Everyone told me to ignore it – but it was like an addiction.” At one event, Nicola Roberts of Girls Aloud – who had seen the clip of her crying – took Nelson aside. “She said: ‘Can I just give you one bit of advice? Please don’t read stuff about you. It’s the worst thing you could do.’” Nelson rolls her eyes self-mockingly. “But did I listen? No.” Contestants had been told help was available if they were struggling, but Nelson had learned that talking only made the problem worse. “I don’t think any of the team really knew how upset it was making me – it’s just go-go-go, from the car into hair and makeup, then rehearsals.” It was also a popularity contest. “We just wanted to make everyone happy, and we wanted everyone to like us.” In December 2011, Little Mix became the first group to win The X Factor. Their debut single entered the charts at No 1 seven months later; DNA, their first album, was released in November 2012. Scrutiny of Nelson only increased amid the pressure to maintain momentum. Although she tried not to discuss it, she feels the abuse came to define her public image. “I’d become a bit of a joke. People would make memes, chopping my head off in a group photo and putting a monster or ET on there. I’d be in live Q&As and these things would pop up and I’d have to just sit there.” Interviewers asked her how she dealt with it; fans said they looked up to her. She was depressed and in denial: she refused antidepressants, and therapy didn’t help. “Our schedule was so gruelling. I was going to see a therapist at six o’clock in the morning, crying, and then going to a photoshoot.” Meanwhile, in public, she was “giving speeches about being confident”. Little Mix, as the guardians of girl power, were not only supposed to represent every woman, but defend every woman. “I felt I had to be this person who was like …” Nelson juts her jaw, sashays from side to side, a facsimile of her sassy music-video persona: “‘I don’t care what people are saying about me, I’m this strong woman.’ That was the role I had to take on in the group, when really I was an absolute mess.” In the lead-up to TV performances or video shoots: “I’d starve myself … I’d drink Diet Coke for a solid four days and then, when I felt a bit dizzy, I’d eat a pack of ham because I knew it had no calories. Then I’d binge eat, then hate myself.” Yet she did not see herself as having an eating disorder. “I could see that I was losing weight and sometimes I’d see a few good comments and that spiralled me to be like: ‘This is how I need to stay.’ No one cares whether your performance was good, or if you sounded great.” Nelson started skipping events where she knew she would be photographed. On one magazine shoot, the wrong size clothes were provided. “I had a meltdown. I cried so much, I had to wear sunglasses. I did one photo, then left.” She hid her misery well, she says now. “I think people just thought I was a miserable bitch.” Her lowest point was in the lead-up to Little Mix’s second album, Salute, in 2013. Her mum, Janice, increasingly desperate, told her she had to quit the band. Yet Nelson worried that leaving – or even taking a break – would draw more attention to herself. “Everyone’s going to ask why.” In November 2013, Little Mix returned to The X Factor to perform their new single, Nelson notably slimmed down. Coverage centred on one tweet from Katie Hopkins: “Packet Mix have still got a chubber in their ranks. Less Little Mix. More Pick n Mix.” Increasingly, Nelson felt trapped. “I felt that I physically couldn’t tolerate the pain any more.” She attempted suicide. Nelson’s family, her management and the rest of the group knew – but “once it was spoken about, it wasn’t ever spoken about again,” she says. She was offered time off, but once more was too frightened of drawing attention to herself to take it. The turning point came in February 2014, when Little Mix spent six weeks travelling across North America, opening for Demi Lovato. One day, on the bus, the dancers pulled her aside and told her she had to quit Twitter, likening it to a book filled with “loads of nasty things” that Nelson always had her nose in. She finally deleted her account. “It was a long, hard process, because I didn’t want to help myself. But it wasn’t until I deleted Twitter that everything changed for me and I slowly started to feel normal again.” Through more regular therapy and talking to friends and family, eventually she was able to stop reading articles about herself, and distance herself from her public image even as Little Mix’s star continued to climb. In 2016, Glory Days became their first No 1 album in the UK. Since February, Nelson has been dating the 2017 Love Island contestant Chris Hughes, who has defended her publicly from online trolling and who she says is a positive influence on her feelings about fame: “It’s nice to be around someone who doesn’t give a shit about all that stuff.” Making the documentary also contributed; she lights up while talking about meeting a body-image specialist, Liz Ritchie, to help her understand her relationship with social media and the “mask” that she had developed to withstand the spotlight. Part of this involved going over footage from The X Factor, which was a difficult experience, but ultimately empowering. “Don’t get me wrong, I still have days when I feel shit in myself but instead of beating myself up about it and being miserable, I think: ‘OK, I’m going to have my moment of being sad, and I’ll be over it.’ Before, I didn’t let myself be sad.” Talking to other young people who have experienced online abuse made her feel less alone. “A lot of people think ‘stop moaning’, but until you’ve experienced it, it’s hard to understand – and it doesn’t just happen to people in the limelight. There’s so many people struggling with social media and online trolling. People need to know about the effects it has.” The turnaround in five years, she agrees, is remarkable: now, as Little Mix work on their sixth album, Nelson is less conscious of her weight, her appearance, what she’s eating – even what is being said about her. To shoot the documentary, she returned to Twitter, and discovered some new slurs. “I didn’t even know some people said that about me, but it’s because I don’t look for it – and also, I. Don’t. Care,” she says, leaning forward in her chair. “Now I’m mentally a lot happier, I just think people are always going to have an opinion. But I only care about mine.” She flashes a smile from beneath all her hair, happy but defiant – and for a moment she looks exactly like the girl in the music videos.

[protegogrindeldore]

I made small Albus & Gellert playlist. I don't know what the hell happened to quality (sorry). All the songs:

a drop in the ocean - ron pope

bloom - troye sivan

brother - kodaline

dark paradise - lana del rey

empty space - james arthur

i know - tom odell

meet me in the hallway - harry styles

perfectly wrong - shawn mendes

sight of you - tulisa

somebody to love - queen

things we lost in the fire - bastille

total eclipse of the heart - bonnie tyler

wrecking ball - miley cyrus

youngblood - 5 seconds of summer

[whatsonmedia]

Music Monday: Hitlist Of the Week!

Here is the list of top Songs of the week. WhatsOn music editor Adam Humphries has come up with a new hit list for the week. Add these songs to your playlist and get grooving! The Kut releases 2022 FIFA World Cup Single - 'Fun When You're Winning'! Now we've had Fat less with Vindaloo and New Order with England football team as well as that single with James Corden and Tinnie Tempa with "Shout" but now the court has released her own single fun when you're winning. Now, what's actually quite good about it's one of those songs that could just as easily not be a football anthem?  Whenever you listen to the lyrics of the song it doesn't come across as a sure typical football anthem, even though there is a lot of individuality about the song.  As a songwriter, Kut really is showing that she has what it takes to make an anthem-type. Track. https://open.spotify.com/track/1JIanUHIrFdwFmnrectZGK?si=Y3p1n5hNT4-TXtru9BoP9A&utm_source=copy-link The video is a similar sort of thing to The Script and Will.i.am's Hall of fame In that it could just as easily be a song about anything that motivates, and inspires.  I think of anything this is where the genius of the song in the video more or less comes into its own. It's a song about motivation yeah just as easily as a standalone. https://youtu.be/ffCB9-ytvc4 The Kut Socials https://thekut.co.uk https://instagram.com/thekutofficial https://facebook.com/thekut https://twitter.com/thekutgirlsrock https://tiktok.com/@thekutofficial https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsKXv_zDVAs6yFH82xbpXeBmqILr7YXJI www.thekut.co.uk  | www.criminalrecords.cc Becky Hill - Losing First released nearly a decade ago, yes that long ago, and was the first solo single by Voice UK contestant Becky Hill. Losing marks a different genre as when we were first introduced to her we only ever heard her sing rock music so this was definitely something new. It was quite refreshing to hear Becky come out with this number as it sounded a bit fresh a put something new on the dance floor. https://youtu.be/PCulrBwoeqc In the video, Becky just wonders around a funfair occasionally going to the attractions whilst singing. It's quite an intriguing one to watch as it's almost as though you're at the funfair with her and it's you she's talking about or to N Dubz - Charmer Absolutely amazing tune and signals the much needed return of the infamous hip hop grime trio to the music scene. Charmer not only shows us N Dubz in all their glory. But also that they have grown along with both the music industry and their loyal fan base. Dappy and Fazer are as incredible as they were the last time we heard them rap and Tulisa is every inch a front woman of hip-hop and grime. The lyrics are more of a tongue-in-cheek reference to being able to charm someone both with what you've got and what you can do. It's been over ten years and they've not lost touch. https://youtu.be/lBKPfnXck-8 The video has their personal touch and taste pretty much written all over as well as another tongue-in-cheek reference to being a 'charmer'. Their video reminds us of why we fell for the charms of N Dubz and why their fans, both old and new will be wanting them for a while yet SG. Lewis - Meant to Be An amazing attract by British singer SG Lewis. What is disappointing is that this song didn't nearly get enough recognition or attention that it probably deserved when it first appeared. Vocally as a singer, Lewis is in a similar music vein to Billie Eilish in that he demonstrates that you don't have a loud voice just make a record sound good it is easily slightly coarse up to almost whispering. SG Lewis's voice is that quiet soft and smooth, almost a whisper. What's interesting about this song is that it's about acknowledging an attraction that will probably never happen. Listening to lyrics there's that direct reference to the infamous saying it is meant to be it's meant to be https://youtu.be/hfWdOpuNgGw The video for Lewis's song doesn’t follow the typical love story type of situation. And in which you have two characters meet and fall for each other. There are references to relationships between people at a race track. For a debut track onto the music scene, it was quite a good attempt.  Musically he's in the vein of Disclosure, vocally he's in the same vein as Billie Eilish. Overall an absolutely brilliant singer-songwriter with a whole lot more to show Read the full article

[annabawritersdream]

For the Fandom OC Ask Game

Nárael & Ëaris Which canon character does your OC respect the most? Who would your OC say is their best friend?

Nûlbahar Is there someone your OC didn't like at first, but then got along with later? Is there anyone who your OC would die for?

The Ace Babies! (Tulisa & Daron) (and yes I will forever affectionately call them The Ace Babies) Which canon character annoys your OC? What is the worst thing your OC does in their story?

Nárael & Ëaris

Which canon character does your OC respect the most?

As far as Nárael goes, I think it is definitely Aulë. She is definitely one of his Maiar—one of the few Maiarin women to work in the forges—and reveres and looks up to him. Aulë is like a father figure to her and taught her everything she knows and definitely has a soft spot for her due to her inquisitive nature and her strong will. Nárael can be a bit of an airhead and perhaps is not the most cultured Maia out there (she's not stupid, but she generally tends not to show any interest for things that are not connected to her daily life/job in the forges. Also, she probably doesn't really have time to read many books and study since she works in the forges pretty much all day and later in the evening she's simply too tired to do anything other than taking a bath and going to bed. In my headcanons, Aulë’s Maiar are generally perceived to be a bit aloof (primarily because their life revolves solely around the forges), but Nárael is definitely not that way. She's spunky and bubbly and wants to learn more. She's perhaps a bit shy around some people (of non-Maiar, Aragorn is the first that comes to mind), but if she feels comfortable and is fond of someone (like Enna, for instance) she will most certainly muster up a bit of courage and ask questions. She's also likely to forget about rules and make unsolicited remarks or comments, but she doesn't do it to be mean or inconsiderate. She's just a bubbly girl who genuinely wants to understand, know more about the world and make people feel happy. One thing that I remember from my Tolkien OC week one-shot for day 1 for instance, is how Nárael compliments Enna on her hair. I think it's the opening line. Her attempt to cheer her lady up is immediately shut down by Handalimë who reminds her of the rules—no one is allowed to speak to Enna unless she addresses them first. There is a whole protocol thing people should be mindful of since Enna, following her marriage to Eönwë is given Varda's ring and that means she has the Queen of the Vale's full authority and power. Eönwë is given Manwë’s ring and, consequently, all of his master's powers are transferred to him. It's basically a wedding gift (there's actually a more specific reason as why this is done, but I won't talk about it here, since it's not relevant to the ask itself).

Speaking of Eönwë, Nárael grows to respect him a lot as well. She has never had much to do with him when she was in Valinor and they never really interacted. It's actually my headcanon not many Maiar interacted with him because they were somewhat afraid of him (for literally no reason!? He's the kindest, sweetest boy) and Nárael was one of those people. She found him intimidating and, the few times that their paths crossed, she just turned around and ran away. Little bit of trivia: Nárael is Arien’s little sister and, according to earlier versions of the Silmarillion, Eönwë was in love with her and killed Morgoth to avenge her death. I don't think Arien will show up in the story, but Eönwë was indeed in love with her within the LOI timeline. She didn't give him the time of day, but he loved her. Arien often talked about him to Nárael so that's mainly how she knew him. To her, he was merely the powerful herald who liked her sister, but she did not know him personally at all. Had Arien maybe accepted his courtship, maybe she would have gotten to know him a fair bit, but, then again, since she was not interested…it simply didn't happen. She only gets the chance to develop some sort of an acquaintance with him once she enters Enna's service and realizes that there's no reason to fear him. She admires how devoted he is to Enna and to his children and is particularly touched by how loving he is to Anárion. Though she's initially still very much intimidated by him, she learns to be comfortable around him and is eventually able to have a conversation with him without stuttering, constantly looking at floor and blushing. She also learns to tell him what she thinks and he'll appreciate her bluntness. She is among the people who cry the most at his funeral.

-

I must say I don't have much going for Ëaris at the moment but, since she's from Rivendell, I would assume she respects Elladan and Elrohir, but, as I don't think she would have had reason to get to know them on a personal level—she wasn't of noble birth and lived a relatively quiet and unassuming life before she moved to Gondor—I think she just respected them because they were her lords and she was expected to respect them. I think does respect Eönwë and Olórin because they've both been kind to her and Arwen as well as she becomes her principal lady-in-waiting once Munthiel, Arwen's main lady, is banished due to her affair with Daerion. This is a whole subplot I'm still developing, but the time Daerion shows up (as early as LOI’s next chapter or the one after that; I am still rearranging and editing stuff), he's already sleeping with her and she thinks they're basically already married. Of course to Daerion she is just a plaything he can discard on a whim, but she is genuinely in love with him. I don't know exactly how their story will develop yet—I had thought about her getting pregnant and being exiled because of it, but there is no denying that would overcomplicate/oversaturate Gilraen’s character arc and I don't know if I want to do that. All I know is that, one way or another, Munthiel is banished from court and Ëaris becomes Arwen's principal lady-in-waiting/lady of the chamber. I think she and Nárael meet when Arwen visits her daughters at Enna’s “finishing school” (I really need to find an appropriate name for it, as finishing schools weren't really a thing in medieval times) and it's love at first sight for them both. They try not to act on their feelings—they don't know how their respective ladies would take it and they think it's sinful and that they should repent and all that. I think Nárael will feel especially guilty about it since she's a Maia and will probably just assume it’s some Melkorean influence lingering on her or whatever. Ëaris, although doubtful, is a lot less concerned about what ifs and the possible implications of their love story—I think they do start a secret affair that goes on for a while—and just wants to be with her. She starts learning Valarin and attempts to write a love note/little poem titled Benim ateşli, alev alev yanan kızıl saçlı kadınım (=My fiery, flaming redheaded woman). It's almost certainly not perfect and her grammar leaves a lot to be desired, but Nárael finds it absolutely lovely and has it framed. I think that once their relationship is uncovered, Enna will take it a lot better than Arwen does (I somehow picture Arwen to be quite conservative, especially Book! Arwen) and the Queen even considers banishing her because fears for her reputation and that of her household. Enna prevents it and, after scolding Arwen and telling her how disappointed she is in her, she takes Ëaris into her service so that she and Nárael can be together on the condition that they don't make out/act like a couple when they're working. Once they're dismissed they can do whatever they want, but during their “serving hours” they're expected to be professional and act appropriately according to protocol.

Who would your OC say is their best friend?

Nárael doesn't really have a best friend as she generally gets along with most people (as long as they don't threatens those she cares about), but she's especially close with Elenya (Enna’s blonde Maiarin lady-in-waiting). Elenya is shy and doesn't talk much but she somehow manages to relax whenever Nárael’s around (she really doesn't have much in common with Aranwen and Handalimë is far too stern and strict). Elenya is also indifferent to her quirks and I daresay she actually enjoys them.

-

All in all, I can say Ëaris’ best friend is Nárael. They're probably each other's best friends, to be honest. Nárael loves Elenya deeply, but Ëaris is her girlfriend so it's only natural that their bond is deeper. I’d be worried if it wasn’t. They talk, they go on walks, they practice their needlework together (Ëaris is much more competent; Nárael has blacksmith hands and is not really suited for this kind of things) and Nárael tries to teach her the basics of metallurgy (she's a very skilled worker, but its safe to say she's a terrible teacher as she is not very good at explaining why some things must be done a certain way. Ëaris even has a small notebook she uses to take notes, but she can't even hold a hammer correctly so I'd probably say both sides are “at fault” here. I guess some people are simply not suited for metallurgy and Ëaris is one of them. It matters not though, she's great at other stuff.

Nûlbahar

Is there someone your OC didn't like at first, but then got along with later?

This question fits Nûlbahar so well, actually. There's a specific person she loathed, a person who later became her best friend. That person is…drum roll Enna!

At first I thought the character of Nûlbahar would be extremely minor in regards to the LOI plot. I literally thought she would be a random Haradrim noblewoman Enna met in her thirties or so during some outing. Had I gone with that plotline option, they would have exchanged a few letters but she would have never made a proper appearance within the story. Her face is of course Nur Fettahoğlu (Mahidevran Sultan in Magnificent Century). Now, I since I learned that MC has some flashback episodes with Young Suleiman, Ibrahim, Hatice, Hafsa and Mahidevran, I decided to take the opportunity to include a young Nûlbahar in the story and to feature her character a lot more than I had originally planned. Enna and Nûl (I call her Nûl because I really like her and I usually give nicknames to characters I really like) meet when they're teenagers. She goes to Minas Tirith to represent her Royal Family at Faramir and Finduilas' wedding. (I say her Royal Family because, in my headcanon, the country of Harad is divided in several large provinces and each province has its own King/Sultan. You can only imagine the civil wars and internal strife, which is obviously something Sauron used to his own advantage to corrupt and subdue them). Technically, the task of representing the Sultan at any official event abroad falls upon the Crown Prince/Şehzade, but since Orhan is three years old and the Sultan has no living brothers…it falls upon her. He could've sent some person in his Council or some other trusted nobleman, but he somehow opted for his only daughter (at the time) and I commend him for it. He's more open-minded than Aragorn (for now).

So, Nûlbahar goes to Minas Tirith with all her servants and attendants and whatnot. It's clear to everyone—even to those that know nothing about Haradrim culture—that she is someone important. She is received by Aragorn and Eldarion is also present at the meeting. Of course maids are spying on them (they shouldn't be allowed, but even guards and sentries enjoy their fair share of gossip) and rumors starts spreading. Since the maids cannot hear every single thing that's being said, they start making up stuff which is distorted until the final rumor is something along the lines of “Prince Eldarion is to be wed to some Haradrim rich girl.” All the noblewomen of the court learn the rumor and Enna does too. She is outraged and rightly so: after all, she is the Prince's betrothed and feels that Aragorn betrayed her. For the first time in her life, she's angry at him. Instead of asking for an explanation and confronting him though, she has one of her maids (probably Maira) try and find out information about the “Haradrim rich girl”: what she looks like, what she dresses like etc. Maira spies on her for a while and whenever Enna deems that she has gathered enough information about her she goes to the chambers assigned to Nûlbahar and confronts her and basically tries to hurt her. She doesn't want to kill her, but she just wants her to suffer the way she suffered.

She hides scissors up the sleeve of her dress and goes to her chambers at night with the intention to scar her face—it’s something she has gone through at the hands of fellow ladies who were jealous because of her future Queen status so she feels that it's only right that Nûlbahar experiences the same. She hopes that, by making her ugly, Eldarion will be disgusted and discard her. Enna's mindset is that if she can't have the Prince, then no one will. (This is VERY out of character for her, but she sees her marriage to Eldarion as her only way to survive and she is determined to make it happen). So, she goes to Nûlbahar's room and attacks her while she's sleeping and the two girls fight. They cut each other, they try to smother one another with pillows and they need to be forcefully separated before one of them actually kills the other. From that day forward, Enna constantly belittles her and annoys her and refuses to listen to what Nûlbahar has to say. Since Nûlbahar is not one to stay silent and take it in, she talks back to her and the two of them basically cause a major scene every single time. Then again, this VERY out-of-character for Enna, but she just cannot accept that an “inferior woman” and a traitor would even think of marrying her Prince. Enna cannot really sleep well and is in pain because of nightmare and poor health. Ioreth gave her some ‘medicine’ to start her period—being of Dúnedain descent and being technically blessed with a longer life also means that you physically develop much later compared to “regular” humans—and suffers a lot going through cramps, weakness and other period-related symptoms. Dúnedain women are supposed to be much stronger and tolerant to pain because of their “pure” blood, but Enna, who's already sick, is not really strong. At all. That's when she gets addicted to opium and other painkillers/tranquilizers/stuff that, if not taken responsibly, messes up with your emotions and your brain in general. She cannot really control her emotions and acts a lot more erratically than she normally would—she never would, actually—and is involved in some disputes and things that cause her to lose popularity and support.

Other ladies and her rivals are delighted by it and they all get together to finally get rid of her as they are convinced no one would care about her. He's apparently lost the King's favor so that justifies their actions in their mind. They corner her and they're about to stab her when Nûlbahar and Mereida (= the young Haradrim maid who had been entrusted to Enna as part of Aragorn's “social program” of assimilating the people of Harad into Gondorian society) step in and save her. That's a pivotal moment for Enna as it then that she starts to realize that even the Haradrim can be good people (she just doesn't admit it…yet). She thanks Nûlbahar and she allows her to speak and learns that Aragorn was, in fact, only being polite. He had just asked tons of questions in the hopes of understanding how to improve his aforementioned “welfare program”, which Eldarion was expected to lead (good luck with that). Enna feels horrible and apologizes again and the two girls steer clear from one another until Enna gets married to Eldarion. The day after the wedding, Nûlbahar visits her again to inform her that she's due to leave to go back to Harad, but suddenly stops as she notices that Enna's face is covered in bruises, she has a split lip and that her nose seems to be bleeding (she's holding a handkerchief over it). Nûlbahar sees Enna is desperately trying to act normal, but she's shaking and looks on the verge of a breakdown. Although she cannot really say she likes Enna at this point in time, she is horrified—abusers of any kind in Harad are either stripped of their titles and forever banished or executed if the case merits it, no matter who they are—and tries to gently confort her. Enna has a major breakdown, but it takes her a while to start talking about the things that went down following the wedding ceremony: Eldarion got drunk, got mad at her for simply opening her mouth and saying something, beat her up, the wedding night itself was painful and absolutely horrible—she didn't want to do anything as she was scared of him being drunk but he acted like they had to and basically forced her to say yes by guilt-tripping her— and then left her alone because he “wasn't satisfied”. Nûl sees Enna is scared and helpless and offers to tell Aragorn about if she doesn't feel up to it. Enna protests her and tells her to keep quiet, but kind of clings to her. Nûl decides to postpone her trip home and sends her father a letter. She helps her take a bath and change into a clean dress and stays until Enna appears to be better. In the meantime, she and her father send each other letters and Nûl tells him what's she's been learning about Gondorian customs. Her dad thinks she's on a diplomatic mission and compliments her, telling her that she can stay in Minas Tirith as long as she wishes. She only returns to Harad when Orhan catches a fever, but she stays in Minas Tirith for about three months (Enna gets pregnant in the meantime and Nûl recommends her herbal teas that are supposed to help with nausea and sickness). The two of them correspond as often as they can and Nûl offers her condolences when Enna tells her she lost the baby. They correspond for years. As you know, Enna gets married to Elphirion and Nûl also gets married, but as her every pregnancy ends up in a miscarriage, it becomes clear that she cannot have children.

Her father is very disappointed in her and his general demeanor toward her is completely changed. She tries several more times to have a baby, but she can't and her father has her divorce her husband. Orhan and her little sisters are the only comfort and she sends letters to Enna whenever she can, but she's pretty sad when she hears that Anárion is born. I mean, she's happy for Enna, but she is sad as well because she, too, would love a little boy. She attends the Elenwë wedding and basically spends almost of her personal money in gifts for each of Enna's babies. She's kind of an aunt to them and they love her very much. She'll eventually marry Abrazân Pasha (Ibrahim from MC) with Enna's full support and they will both attend Enna's funeral when she dies. They'll both be devastated to the core.

Is there anyone who your OC would die for?

I daresay she would die for Enna and her little siblings. She's especially close to Orhan as she helped his mother raise him—Nûlbahar and her siblings have different mothers. Nûl’s mom was a random concubine while Orhan and his full sisters’ was the Sultan’s Haseki and legal wife. In my headcanon, only the son born of a Haseki and legal wife can become Sultan. Haseki means “main consort” and it's generally the title that is given to the concubine that the ruler intends to marry (I took the inspo from the Ottoman Empire but I tweaked things a bit. Many Sultans had a Haseki, the “Main Consort” but only two actually married their Haseki. In my version of Harad, if a Sultan bestows the title of Haseki upon a concubine he basically has to marry her. It's the prelude to a legal ceremony).

She helps Orhan with his studies and spends most of her spare time with him and the sisters. She's basically a second mom to them. She's not that much older than them, but she's very mature and the children find her presence reassuring. She's also instrumental in arranging Fae and Orhan’s wedding. It will take her years and years, but Enna will eventually change her mind, although it's not because of Nûl. By the time she consents to Fae and Orhan’s marriage in late FoA 42, Enna already knows she will probably die—she’s diagnosed with an incurable disease her physicians don't know how to treat—and wants her sister to be happy in spite of the chance of Orhan taking multiple concubines (that's what actually held her back. She didn't want Fae to hurt).

The Ace Babies! (Tulisa & Daron) (and yes I will forever affectionately call them The Ace Babies) Which canon character annoys your OC?

This is a very difficult question for me to answer as I picture the Ace Babies to be chill and unproblematic. I can't think of anyone at the moment, really. Maybe…Eldarion? Everybody finds him annoying so it might be him. That applies to them both, by the way. They're pretty similar in personality.

What is the worst thing your OC does in their story?

Daron probably got in a bar fight with someone because someone called Erchirion homophobic slurs and Daron is very loyal towards his Dol Amroth uncles. They essentially raised him so he sees them as dads/uncles. He's especially close to Erchirion because he's uncle who's not straight and Daron is also not straight so…they understand one another on an even deeper level.

Darion might have even partaken in gambling a couple times (maybe even more than a couple times. Let's say a few times, just to be sure). Apparently, gambling was an accepted form of entertainment in the Middle Ages and I admit I'm not sure whether it was illegal. Some sources that it was, but then again, some sources say it was accepted, so it was so common that it automatically became legal? I have a feeling though, that JRRT would strongly disapprove of such practices, and I assume Aragorn would probably make gambling illegal. Daron was taught how to play cards and dice games by his Dol Amroth uncles and I'm sure there was some money going around, especially in taverns. I think he lost more than a couple bets, but he might have also won some of them. And now I need to do massive research on gambling in the Middle Ages.

Tulisa probably stole a horse that was being mistreated. I don't have the details figured out yet, but I can see her taking a lonely walk and seeing someone—maybe a farmer— whipping a horse and waiting for them to get into their house and simply taking the horse with her. It's a good deed indeed, but…it's still theft, I am afraid. Aragorn may even try her before he drops the case because she really didn't do anything wrong. Faramir would of course strongly support this and so would everyone with a bit of a brain, I think?

Also, I think she was pretty wild during her childhood years and chopped off the hair of a lady who had maligned her mother (remember that her mom had been accused of witchcraft just because she was into plants, medicine and science? I don't think Tulisa took it all too well and when some of the ladies who'd had a hand in spreading false rumors showed up to her doorstep to apologize, she plotted her revenge. She was a child, so she resorted to childish pranks such a chopping off hair while they were asleep in the guest bedroom. She may have even taken a few dresses out of their trunks and burned them/made them disappear. Her mother never knew though. Better yet, if she suspected, she never told on her and probably thanked her).

That's all! Thank you again for the ask!

FANCASTS:

Sophie Turner as Nárael

Hanna Mangan-Lawrence as Ëaris

Nur Fettahoğlu as Nûlbahar (main faceclaim; I still have to find the name for the actress portraying the young her)

Saadet Aksoy as Tulisa

Gethin Anthony as Daron

[kerguelenn]

Hello-Robbaery

I miss Got, I miss Robb, I miss Margaery. And I love Adele.

Hello, it's me I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet To go over everything They say that time's supposed to heal ya but I ain't done much healing

You have received a new voicemail

Hello, it’s me, Margaery. I just want to talk to you, all of the things that we never dare to discuss. I need to explain myself and apologize for all the wrong I did to you. Call me back, kiss. Goodbye

BIIIIIIP

Hello, can you hear me I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be When we were younger and free I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet

You have received a new voicemail

Hello, I know that you owe me nothing but I was wondering if after all this year you would like to meet. Goodbye.

BIIIIIIP

There's such a difference between us And a million miles

You have received a new voicemail

Hey, listen, I know you’re ignoring me, and I don’t even know if you listen to the voicemail I’ve been leaving you. Robb, please, give me a sign, something, please. Answer me. [sigh] Bye.

BIIIIIIP

Hello from the other side I must've called a thousand times to tell you I'm sorry, for everything that I've done But when I call you never seem to be home

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, I wanted to tell you that, that I get back there, in the Vale, near our old apartment. I almost try to get in, just to see if things had changed. But I didn’t dare to, still a coward.  Then, I just walk around the campus, I order a coffee, where we used to go. i relive our old memory who seems to have been erased from my head. I finally understand that I never stop loving you. I just pretend to move on, like my dear dad ask me to do, five years ago. Bye

BIIIIIIP

Hello from the outside At least I can say that I've tried to tell you I'm sorry, for breaking your heart But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, It’s me. Again. I know you don’t want to hear anything about me, and I understand that. i hurt you, but I need you to understand, so that I can move on, not blaming myself every day. Bye

BIIIIIIP

Hello, how are you It's so typical of me to talk about myself I'm sorry, I hope that you're well Did you ever make it out of that town Where nothing ever happened

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, I see that you still not responding, and you probably doesn’t listen to this. But you still haven’t block my number, and i will not give up. I never had the attention to hurt you. But I had to break up with you, that was my duty to my family.  I not that sound odd but I need you to understand; because I know it’s the same for you, you wear a name, Stark who mean something in this world. And name like yours, or mine comes with responsibilities and obligation. Daddy had just finished signed a bad business and we were losing to much. And like you know, Journalist, if we can called them that, love drama. And just like that, we were on almost all of the front page in all the country. that was a nightmare. Tyrell’s name didn’t meant anything and Daddy needed me, he needed my help, and my brother’s help. He thought that our duty was to help and make the Tyrell great again, and by that, we needed to use our private relationship. Loras had to give an ultimatum to his boyfriend, he wanted to be able to get out in front of everyone, to throw there secret away. Renly refuses, and Loras break up with him. At this time, I thought I was okay. I was in a stable relationship, with the oldest Stark, I was living with you. I couldn’t give more to my father, since he love you so much. So I decide to help Willas, help him find  a girl. And this is the exact moment everything just get out of hand. Sansa would have been perfect for Willas, she was ready to get back in the game. And during their first and last date, my father told me that our couple wasn’t interesting anymore. People needed more, we weren’t new, they needed more. And Renly who run after my brother and accept to get out of the closet for him wasn’t love by anyone. Fucking homophobic! Daddy needed me, he trusted me. But when he kept talking, I just feel like I was in my history class, listening to my teacher talk about young girl who were sell to older man, richer man for the benefit of the family. I fell like them. Daddy told me my feeling didn’t matter anymore, the cause were bigger than them. I had to be a Tyrell and save the family business. He told me I needed to end this teenagers flirt and move to something serious. Like our three years didn’t meant anything. Our history was serious, our love meant something. And I don’t know why I let my father told me what I should do. I should have make him see how great we were. I should have spoken, or just get out of his office. I should have done something, but I stay in my chair, silent like a perfect doll. And I let him do, I did exactly what he wanted.

But if I had done something, I could be next to you, happy and alive, till death tears us apart. But here am I, without you, alone and cold.

I hate you for a time because you didn’t try to stop me from running away from you, you just let me go. And for a short time, I almost make myself believe that maybe it was right, we would never have stayed together.

So I didn’t run back to you when that was all I wanted. And then my father show me your replacement: Joffrey Baratheon-Lannister. The monster who hurt Sansa over and over.

And when I finally wake up, it’s too late, I’m at his arm but I can’t be free anymore, and even less get back to you. My strings are unbreakable, and you moved on. Good-bye

BIIIIIIP

It's no secret That the both of us are running out of time

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, I wanted to excuse myself, I always talk about me, convinced that you do not listen to me. I want to know, how are you? Did you live this town where nothing ever happens’? Did you get back to Winterfell? How is your mother? And Sansa? I miss her you know; I never find the time to excuse Joffrey comportment during Annual Gala from last year, he spends the night insulting you and your family. he even threatens you. And Bran, how are his legs? I would love to be near you to be there. And forget my living hell, the one I live in for so long. I would love to see you, but me both know it’s impossible. Bye.

BIIIIIIP

Hello from the other side I must've called a thousand times to tell you I'm sorry, for everything that I've done But when I call you never seem to be home

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, It was just to say, I hope Tulisa make you happy, you deserve it. It’s time for me to accept that you’re not mine anymore. You don’t belong to me. Bye.

BIIIIIIP

Hello from the outside At least I can say that I've tried to tell you I'm sorry, for breaking your heart But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore

You have received a new voicemail

Hi, Sansa told me about your little Edd. I hope you’re happy. I met her, last week, in a coffee. It was good, to find an old piece of me again. I try to tell myself that is nothing to do with you but my heart doesn’t seem to listen. people say time heal wound. For my part, I doubt they will ever disappear one day if I have to suffer continually to remember the history we lived together and the feeling we shared then be it. Bye

BIIIIIIP

Anymore

Hello from the other side I must've called a thousand times to tell you I'm sorry, for everything that I've done But when I call you never seem to be home

You have received a new voicemail

Hey, Listen, I just have a phone call from Sansa. In truth, I didn’t understand everything that she tried to tell me; she was crying and could breathe. that made the call even weirder, and we never talk about you since we were friend again. the only world I understand was “Robb...Car...Unexpected”. Nothing understandable.

All I know is that two hours before she called me I fell this horrific pain in my chest that makes me drop to my knee and scream. I felt like a part of myself just die. That was you.

You were coming back from the restaurant, you were celebrating your two years since your wedding. And a truck ram in you. The three of you were dead before help gets there. At least you get to heaven together, hand in hand.

I don’t understand why am I not crying right now, but I need to tell you goodbye. It’s always been you Robb, and now, I tell you my last goodbye.

BIIIIIIP

Hello from the other side I must've called a thousand times to tell you I'm sorry, for everything that I've done But when I call you never seem to be home

The number you had dial have been deleted.

Hello from the outside At least I can say that I've tried to tell you I'm sorry, for breaking your heart But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore

[hiddenfangirllife-blog]

Back to the Beginning Chapter 1

I was in the holding room at the X-Factor Judges’ Auditions, and I was freaking out. As the last audition of the day, I knew that I would be dealing with four tired judges. That meant that I needed to be good, so that the judges wouldn't focus on the previous auditions and would only focus on me.

I readjusted my guitar strap and a hand pushed me forward. “Go on in,” the accompanying voice told me, and I made my way into the audition room.

Once I was standing on the X, I smiled at the judges. “Hello,” I greeted them.

“Hello,” Simon Cowell answered. “What's your name?”

“My name is Kayla Payne, I'm sixteen years old, and I'm from Wolverhampton,” I said, trying to remind myself to just focus on the judge that was talking to me. I still had no clue who the other judges were.

“Well, Kayla, it's nice to meet you. What will you be singing for us today?” Simon asked.

I grinned. My brother’s song, I thought. “Little Things by One Direction,” I answered.

“Well then, off you go,” he said, and I slung my guitar into playing position and started to sing.

Your hand fits in mine like it's made just for me

But bear this in mind, it was meant to be

And I'm joining up the dots with the freckles on your cheeks

And it all makes sense to me

I know you've never loved

The crinkles by your eyes when you smile

You've never loved your stomach or your thighs

The dimples on your back at the bottom of your spine

But I'll love them endlessly

And I won't let these little things

Slip out of my mouth

But if I do, it's you, oh it's you they add up to

I'm in love with you

And all your little things

Simon held his hand up as I finished the first chorus and I stopped playing and singing almost immediately. “I think I'm going to go straight to the other end of the table for this one,” he said. “Louis?”

I turned my attention to Louis Walsh, who had returned for his millionth season, it seemed like. “You've got great control for someone your age,” he said. “I definitely was not expecting that. Plus, you're cute as a button and I think you could go very far in this competition.”

I blushed and looked down. “Thank you,” I said, as Simon said the name of the next judge, which I missed.

“Okay, I'm going to start by asking you a question,” a very familiar voice came. “Kayla, what brings you to the X Factor?”

I looked up, and my suspicions were confirmed. My darling brother, Liam Payne, was sitting at the judges’ table. This was going to be interesting. “I'm here because I want to do what I love,” I replied.

“And you don't think you need to be older?” he pressed. Liam, I thought, give me a break. Just because I didn't tell you, you go all overprotective brother on me? Not cool.

I shook my head. “Didn't you think you needed to be older when you auditioned at sixteen?” I countered.

“Good answer!” The one female judge, Tulisa, who had also returned, quipped, making me smirk. “Personally, Kayla, I thought you did great; you were confident, you have a great voice, and your personality is just incredible.”

I blushed once more. “Thank you,” I responded.

Simon had turned in his chair to face Liam. “Liam, I get the feeling that you have a problem with Kayla here.” he said, and Liam turned to face me.

I raised an eyebrow, and asked Liam, “You going to tell them or does that fall to me?”

Simon butted in, “I addressed Liam, so Liam, I'd prefer it if you replied.” I smirked.

Liam sighed dramatically. “She's my baby sister,” he said, and I smiled.

“Sounds about right,” I confirmed.

The faces of the other judges were priceless. Simon looked bewildered, which made me wish I had my phone so that I could capture the moment forever. Louis looked equally as shocked, since in all his years on X Factor, this had never happened. Shocker. Tulisa seemed unable to comprehend, just looking between Liam and I over and over again.

Finally, Simon seemed to regain his composure. “Well, with that said, I'm going to kick off voting with a yes,” he said, and I covered my hand with my mouth, shocked. “Louis?”

Louis nodded. “You're talented and you've got a great personality - yes!” he exclaimed, leaving me needing only one yes to go through to Bootcamp.

“Liam?” Simon asked, and my brother looked up at me.

“As much as I want to be your brother right now, I’m going to be a judge, recognize your talent, and say yes,” he said, sighing, and I started looking all around me, waiting for someone to tell me this was a joke, unable to comprehend that he just put me through to Bootcamp.

“For the record, you've got four yeses - it's a yes from me too!” Tulsa chimed in, and I think I started crying.

“Oh my gosh,” I managed to say. “Thank you guys so much!”

“Liam, go give your sister a hug!” Tulisa commanded my brother, as if she believed he should have already done it. He followed her command and came over to where I was standing, before he crushed me in a bear hug.

“Come on, I'll walk you out,” he whispered, and I walked out of the room with one of his arms around my shoulders and my free hand waving to the other judges, a huge smile on my face.

When we got back outside, Liam pulled me into another bear hug. “I can't believe you didn't tell me you were auditioning,” he said.

“I can't believe you didn't tell us you were judging,” I said.

“That's fair,” he said. “But you auditioned with my song!”

I laughed. “Believe me, if I’d known you were going to be judging, I’d have picked a different song,” I responded.

“I don't see why,” he said. “You sounded amazing.”

“Says the child that thought he was the only Payne that could sing,” I joked.

“Hey! I was fifteen,” he defended.

“I know,” I said, laughing. “I was only teasing.”

“Ah, always making jokes, my sister. Hey, we're done for the day, why don't I take you back to your….” he trailed off.

“Hotel, and I'd love that,” I said. “Mum and Dad haven't seen you in forever, and I don't have a ride. Mum dropped me off on her way to the mall this morning.”

“Well, come with me,” Liam said. “I actually got driven here, so I hope you're ready for your first limo ride! This one is pretty cool.”

I smiled. “I knew there was a reason I loved you.”

He smiled in response. “Yeah, yeah, other than the fact that I gave you a yes which means you get to go to BOOTCAMP!! Are you excited?” he asked.

“Of course I'm excited, Liam!” I yelled. “I just don't want to wait a month and a half. It kind of sucks, the wait.”

Liam nodded. “I remember the feeling. It's probably the most stressful point in the competition. But look on the bright side: after Bootcamp, everything moves fairly quickly.”

“You always know just what to say,” I said. “But I'm nervous about six chair challenge. The brutality of it scares me, because everyone's good at that point.”

He pulled me into a hug and rested his chin on my head. “Kayla, you're one of the most amazing people I know. You're going to be fine. Now come on, let's get you home.”

He pulled out of the hug and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, steering me towards the limo. Once we were inside, Liam gave his driver the name of the hotel I was staying at, and fifteen minutes later, was walking me inside.

“Thanks for the ride, Li,” I said. “By the way, how's life? We haven't really talked in awhile.”

He grinned as I went for the stairs. “Life's good. Cheryl’s moved in with me and little baby Bear was born, we’re really excited. You probably saw that the boys and I won another Brit a few months ago. That's really about it,” he informed me.

“Okay, so I've only missed a Brit. Practically nothing,” I said, laughing.

“That works,” he said. “Come on, can't you climb these things any faster?”

“Um, I'm carrying a guitar case on my back. I need the exercise but can only move so fast,” I replied.

“Okay,” he responded. “I get it, but next time we're taking the elevator.”

I stopped to open the door that let off at the second floor, where my room was. “Okay.”

Liam followed me down the hall to the suite my parents and I were in. After motioning for Liam to stay in the hallway, I opened the door and stepped inside.

“Mum! Dad! I'm back!” I yelled, and they came into the main room of the suite from their bedroom. My room was the room next door, which had a door linking it to the suite.

“Kayla! How did it go? Are you through to Bootcamp?” My mom asked, crushing me inside.

I laughed, happy to be back with my family. “I'll tell you later. For right now, I have a surprise,” I announced, and walked over to the door, opened it, and motioned Liam in. “SURPRISE!” I yelled.

“Liam!” my parents said, rushing over to him. “We didn't know you were in London!”

He laughed. “Especially not Kayla,” he responded, and I blushed.

“Shut up, Liam,” I muttered.

“So Liam, why are you in London?” my dad asked.

“Funny story, actually,” Liam said, scratching the back of his head and looking sheepish. “Did I tell you that I was judging X Factor this season?”

My parents looked between the two of us. “This has got to be...but...Kayla?” my mom stuttered.

“Yes, it's true, and yes, I went up there in front of Simon and Liam and sang a One Direction song and didn't even know my brother was judging me,” I said, putting my head in my hands. “Yes, it happened.”

Liam laughed. “I found it amusing, actually, until I saw the look of shock on Kay’s face when she saw me and I remembered that I hadn't told you yet.”

“Well, son, do you blame her?” my dad asked. “Speaking of Kay’s audition, how'd it go, Kay?”

“Well...I’m through to Bootcamp!” I screamed, smiling widely, and my parents crushed me in a hug.

“Now we have two X Factor contestants in the family!” Liam laughed, joining the family hug.

“That we do,” Mum agreed. “And to celebrate, we’re getting dinner tonight.” Before Liam could even say anything, she added, “And Liam’s not paying for it.”

Li just shrugged and wrapped his arm me. “Alright,” he agreed.

“So Kayla, where are we headed?” my dad asked.

“Nando's!” I said in a you had to ask? tone.

My mum rolled her eyes. “Kay, we've eaten there five times since we got here,” she responded.

“And they are great,” I finished her sentence. “You're letting me pick, I'm picking Nando's, that is the end of that.”

“Well, if we're going to Nando's, I'm calling Niall,” Liam interjected. “He's in London right now, and he'd kill me if I went without him. Hope you're ready to meet another celebrity, Kay.”

I shrugged. “Don't know if I am or not, but I've been around you for a few years, so we'll see,” I responded. “Now call him! I'm hungry!”

Liam laughed as he pulled out his phone and called Niall. “Hey, Niall,” he said. “I'm going to Nando's, want to come with? There's someone I want you to meet…….What? Yeah, you can drive yourself……..We'll be there in twenty minutes. See you there.” He hung up and turned to face us. “Niall’s meeting us there.”

Our parents nodded and we walked back downstairs and out of the hotel, one big happy family. With Liam’s arm around me, I pulled out my phone and opened Instagram. I made my profile, which had been private for so long, public and then got to work on my bio.

When I was done it read:

Kayla Payne

Singer/Dreamer

Lil sis of that guy Liam from 1D

Be crazy and love always

I showed it to Liam and he shot me a thumbs up as we got into my family's car instead of his limo. “You know, Jack is going to kill me later for this,” he said, referring to his bodyguard.

Mum turned around to face him from the passenger seat. “You really think your parents are going to let you die?” she asked.

“No,” he returned, “but you don't know Jack. He doesn't even trust me with my life.”

“That might be because you have a child that needs its father, Liam,” my father said.

“I see your point,” Li conceded, and that was the end of that conversation. The rest of the ride to Nando's was spent talking about baby Bear, and I don't think I'd ever heard Liam use the words “cute,” “adorable,” and “perfect” so much.

When we arrived at the restaurant, we climbed out of the car and went inside, where Niall was waiting for us. “Liam, mate! It's been too long!” he exclaimed as he walked over and wrapped my brother in a hug.

“I know, Niall, I know. You ordered?” Li returned.

“Yeah, my food should be here in a few,” Niall said, as  I stood there fascinated by the exchange. “Who'd you want me to meet?”

They walked back over to where my parents and I were standing, and after Niall had greeted my parents, he turned to Liam with a questioning look on his face. “That would be who I wanted you to meet,” Liam informed him. “Niall, this is my little sister Kayla. Kay, this is my friend Niall, but you can call him Nialler, Irish, or really whatever you want.”

Niall nodded and then scooped me up into a huge bear hug. “Nice to meet you,” he said. “In case you haven't noticed, I'm a bit of a hugger.”

I laughed. “Don't worry about it,” I responded. “It's nice to meet you, too.”

“So Kayla,” Niall started as a waitress brought his food and set it in front of him. “What was it like growing up with Payno here?”

I laughed. “I smiled everyday,” I answered. “He was a pretty awesome big brother. Did he ever tell you about what happened when I was seven and he was fifteen?”

Niall looked at Liam and raised his eyebrows. Apparently he hadn't heard this story yet. “No, but I'm all ears,” he said, intrigued.

“Well, I was seven, like I said, and I walked into his room and he was singing. I kind of knew the song, so I just randomly started singing along, and it was really off key and just bad,” I said, laughing. “Later that evening, at dinner, Li made a comment about being the only Payne that could sing. I was so pissed, but now it's a joke and he's eating his words.”

Niall laughed, a deep, resonant, genuine laugh. “Never knew Liam to be so arrogant,” he said.

“He doesn't seem it, does he?” I agreed as my family and I received our food. “But you should have seen him when I introduced him to my boyfriend, Drystan. He was more intimidating than Dad, and Dad was downright terrifying.”

My dad cleared his throat before speaking. “Kayla, you were fifteen, and while Drystan’s great...we didn't know him at the time. Speaking of Drystan, when are you going to call and tell him?”

I took a bite of my sweet potatoes while I thought. “I could do it now?” I proposed.

“Yeah, do that!” Liam chimed in. “And FaceTime him!”

I rolled my eyes. “I'll do it when we get back to the hotel. I want to eat right now!” I declared, taking a large bite of chicken and noticing Niall do the same. Soon, my whole family was digging into their meals, and we couldn't help but comment on how good the food was.

When we finished, we paid and left. Niall decided he was coming back to our hotel with me, my parents, and Liam, and so the car was full and the ride back was fun. I ended up half on Niall’s lap and half on a seat. My parents turned up the Top 40, and we had a good time singing along to Ed Sheeran’s new music.

When we got back to the hotel, I raced up the stairs instead of waiting on the elevator, grabbed my guitar, and then grabbed an elevator to take me up to the roof, where the pool was.

I arrived on the roof to find Niall already up there. I ignored him and pulled my phone out, pressing the button to FaceTime Drystan. He picked up before the third ring.

“Hey, baby girl,” he said, smiling. “How's London?”

I couldn't help but smile. “Hey, Drys. London’s great. Actually, it's more than great. I’ve also got news for you,” I responded. God, he was cute, and the way he was looking at me was making my heart melt.

“I'm listening,” he said.

I smiled again, looking down and blushing. “Well, you know how I was talking about auditioning for the X Factor?” I asked, and he nodded. “I did, and now I’m THROUGH TO BOOTCAMP!!!!!” I screamed, jumping up and down.

“Oh my god, Kay, that's great! I wish I was there with you so bad right now,” he exclaimed, mellowing out towards the end. “Sing for me?” he asked, making puppy dog eyes at me and, subsequently, my heart melt.

“All you had to do was ask, baby,” I said, propping my phone up and reaching for my guitar. “What song do you want?”

“Photograph, Ed Sheeran,” he said smiling. He always asked for that song; it was by far his favorite.

“Mmkay,” I said, my fingers finding the first chord before letting the melody fall out of my mouth. As my fingers played the familiar chords and my mouth formed the words, I watched him relax and fall into the melody of the song. When I was finished, he shook himself out of a sort of daze before smiling widely.

“Have I told you how amazing you are?” he asked, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees.

I laid the guitar down on my lap and leaned forward as well. “Only every time I talk to you,” I replied.

“Then I haven't said it enough,” Drystan responded, making me blush.

A text popped up from my dad that Liam was leaving, and if I wanted to see him before he left I needed to get back downstairs quick. “Drystan, baby, I have to go. I'll call you again soon,” I said.

“Bye Kayla. Keep being amazing,” he said before hanging up. After hanging up, I grabbed my guitar and caught the elevator back to my floor. I proceeded to run to my room, where Liam was just leaving. After I set my guitar down, he pulled me into a hug.

“I'll see you in a month and a half, okay? Take care of yourself,” he said.

I smiled, hugging him tightly, before saying, “I'll see you then. Now go. Don't want to keep anyone waiting.” Then, I pulled back and stepped away, watching him walk out the door and down the hall.

Two hours later, I was climbing into bed and falling asleep. As my body relaxed and sleep claimed me, I was oblivious to the fact that Niall Horan had just posted on Instagram for the first time in several weeks and that that post was throwing the Directioners into uproar.

niallhoran: i’m glad we’re friends