#what else did i tag w this
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my first impression of you was. i was like a wide eyed gazelle caught in the headlights- youre so insanely talented and have such a way with words i was like oh my god i need to read everything you made. current impression? pretty much the same but were also holding hands
yvie do not play w me rn or i will jump into ur dms and start waxing poetic abt how much ur art makes me want to slingshot myself into the sun in the actual best way ever HELLO that literally was me seeing that one mike art u posted where the caption was something about boys more akin to drowned cats than boys OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT IDK I THINK ABT THAT ART LIKE EVERY WAKING MOMENT OF MY EXISTENCE AND UR NEW ONE THE BABYGIRL PALETTE THE PINK THE DETAILS ohhhhh i feel so normal abt this (i said, lyingly) anyways we’re holding hands rn actually i’m running to u i’m omw hold ur horses !! 🏃♀️💨
#/ask#yvie n astrobei bffs arc continues#oh that’s already a tag i have#neat !#what else did i tag w this#i must Look#anyways everyone go look at their newest art NEOOWWWWWWOWOWW#NOWWWWWE#(i got creds in the caption hehe)#biggest flex of my life#was being consulted for this masterpiece#feeling so normal abt this…..#(JK)
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my friends & i have big thoughts about bob,,, THUS! i draw our respective interpretations !!!! as you do
TOP DRAWN LAST NIGHT WHEREAS THE BOTTOM WAS DRAWN IN NOVEMBER '22! LOOK AT THAT
( ft @thedoodlecorner's " Vel " & @lemoneychicken's " Borpse " ~ )
#uwu art#Spooky Month#Spooky Month 5 Tender Treats#Spooky Month Tender Treats#Bob Velseb#Spooky Month Bob#blood tw#blood cw#// ask to tag#I am what you call. insane#icb that bottom pic was like. just a bit after tender treats debuted damn#we all BEEN in spooky month hell since then#my idea of bob is like.... generic sadistic slasher serial killer who. honestly just did it because he wanted to fuck everyone else#bUT W/E TRIPLE BOB SQUAD FOR YOU
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exactly what it says on the tin. taken out of his official voicelines & put together for your auditory pleasure _(:з」∠)_
[reblogs appreciated <3]
#boy did i have my hands full w/ making this. NOT IN THAT WAY#call of duty#cod könig#cod konig#cod mw2#cod mwii#konig x reader#cod x reader#konig mw2#uhhh idk what else to tag this. *ghost voice* THAT'LL DO#cod#naughtycodaudios
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REINVENT
YOURSELF
tumblr HATES my 44.1mb image swag so it has SO MUCH COMPRESSION and downsizing here. :') peep the actual intended size & quality (or as good as i could get it exported)
post-return Q!Tubbo :] Tee hee.
un hamburgesa para tubbo (he lookied ungry)
#qsmp#qsmp fanart#tubbo fanart#qsmp tubbo#yippeeee :D#i forgor what other tags i usually use for my art on this blog. fngbnfdj. oh well.#WHY DID THE WATER TURN INTO LAVA [SHAKES CCTUBBO] WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT HELLO. DID ANYBODY ELSE NOTICE THAT BC I DID. IS IT FROM#THE MACHINE OVERHEATING? HE WAS BURNING WHEN HE SURFACED or is it a less physical creative choice...#this is why theyre surrounded by water and lava (and also bc of dying by the ocean monument ^w^ teehee)#if you notice all the details i had in mind when i drew this ily foreva and eva#i drew this over the course of a few days after the revival/return stream but i never posted it IM SHY OK#i wonder how long i spent on it... must be over 6 hrs atleast? considering i also spent like an hour touching things up b4 posting rn..#nice. im in my hours-long compositions era :D smiles irl so happily i love it#<- usually never spends longer than like 1-2 hrs on one drawing#i shared this with a couple of qsmp-enjoying friends of mine and they convinced me to let it fly free ksksks. FOR THE TUBBLINGS o7#also if anybody has a better image sharing option lmk. DHBFK.#blood#ALMOST FORGOT THAT. THERE IS BLOODIN HERE#CONTAINS BLOOD.#guy whos flehs and bone#debatably#art#months later im slapping on that art tag HFHFHG i forgor
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used to daydream about fairytale reconciliations after pretty much every platonic or romantic fallout i ever had, but sometimes it’s healthier to just accept that someone will never own up bc they don’t think you’re worth the trouble. anyone who truly cares would move mountains just to make sure that they communicate w you if they truly want to rectify the situation. but sometimes it’s their ego getting in the way, sometimes they have a narrative of you in their head they’re determined not to break, and sometimes they just don’t care enough about you to even consider it. they don’t have respect for the friendship or relationship in its posthumous state bc it was nothing to them, or at the very least it doesn’t eclipse their pride or their desire to appear correct in a situation or just outright the need to be done w the situation rather than be a good person. still guilty of this but i’ve been getting better at just nipping the delusion in the bud and just being okay w accepting that someone truly does not care. until they prove they do that is the assumption i go w every time. and it is saving me a lot of heartache
#i held out on my ex for MONTHS after we broke up thinking he’d hit me up and be like yo sorry#u did not deserve the way that went down. i should’ve gone about it better#i should’ve taken ur feelings into consideration bc if nothing else the time spent together meant something#even if in the present moment it’s done and i don’t see us going back#i think i owe u that. at the very least in honor of what we had#but did he say any of those things#NO#i’m fine#i’ve had this happen w friendships too like people are just ruthless sometimes and they justify it or just don’t care enough to be better#trying to microdose on delusion less and accept things for what they are#these tags are a roller coaster but i’m keeping them in anyway bc i need something to look back at this weekend#p
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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"I kiss you on the top of your forehead. Uh—May I?"
“You may not, but instead I kiss your lips. May I?”
"No."
#rain does art#my art#doodles#digital art#lines#I will color this I prommy#i've just got this and another thing and the other thing is coming together so good#friends at the table#Fatt#F@tt#counter/weight#c/w#aria joie#jacqui green#The lesbian situationship was so bad I blacked out and figured out how to do mechs half decently#mecha#wip#tecnically#also if there are F@tt fans that read my tags whats a good campian to do after c/w#I started with marielda and did that and have done that and c/w#I wanna know what else is banging!!
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I'm slowly making my way through a new project- editing the entirety of the album PUNCH by Autoheart to the Life Series.
I was originally planning to post all of the edits in order of the songs on the album, but I instead made the Lent one first and am too excited to keep it in my drafts any longer while I work on the first four songs of the album (especially since we're coming up on finals seasons and the amount of time I'll have to work on these is gonna plummet so fast). So instead, I'll be posting them as I make them and make a masterpost of them all in order at the end.
That being said, I hope you enjoy this! I'm really proud of it and a lot of work went into it.
#life series smp#trafficblr#third life smp#last life smp#double life smp#limited life smp#goodtimeswithscar#grian#desert duo#autoheart/life series project#my edits#my art#everyone has to be so nice to me about the audio desync-ing in some places it does that whenever i export it and i can't fix it </3#i COULD tag this one as ship but im not gonna#i DO mean it like that. but like it's just canon clips it can be read however you so choose#also if youve been following me for a little bit youll know i did part of this edit once before#i did the bridge when the afk session came out#and then that plus cherrifire's crane lives project inspired me to assign the whole album to the series#and i was ORIGNALLY planning to do a project like she did w/ the thumbnails#but i couldnt get myself to actually DO IT and also i did map out an entire animatic to factories at one point.#which. on the topic of that. factories or anniversary will be the next ones#anniversary has been started but not fully mapped out whereas factories has been fully mapped out but not started#we'll see which one catches my eye enough first#but all the songs HAVE been assigned so if nothing else i know the gist of what i'm doing for every song#this will definitely be a multi-month project though since one of these takes me a few days to finish#though finals season approaching also means winter break is approaching so who knows! maybe ill bang all of them out in december#(DO NOT HOLD ME TO THAT OH MY GOD)
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Happy ten years to transcendence au and almost as long to Brian the organ duck! How time flies...
I haven't drawn anything for this au in ages but I did remake the 8tracks playlists on Spotify if anyone uses that. Before Brian shows up, imagine Dipper and Mabel are discussing songs to add to the answering machine playlist (which. that's. Did I mean hold music all this time? lol)
#transcendence au#carliedraws#carliedrawstau#traditional#sketchbook#i stopped being a mod like nooot even a year in because. life. but i have always held affection for the au since#might take a spin through the blog to see what happened on there since i left#yall are so creative#maybe ill do an actual entry for the raffle contest thingy? or is that weird cause i used to mod LOL#but for now this because i was feeling nostalgic#audio#did i have a playlist tag#organ duck#body horror w#the thing I can't believe about this character#is that the initial idea for him came from someone making fun of how i said oregon ducks in a stream#i should stream again someday#i dont do digital much these days because of eye problems but i can do it in limited stretches#(how ELSE is one meant to say oregon ducks. no one i know around here says ore-uh-gone)#(i live in non-OR part of the PNW tho and my dad is from OH so. who knows lol)
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Seraphina and Arlo: The Brainwashing of High Tiers
Exposition:
— Remi, Episode 50.
There is a heavy implication that Seraphina and Arlo were raised in much the same way. The pressure on Seraphina comes from her parents, so I’ll extrapolate that the same goes for Arlo. This raises the question: how do the authorities create such a strong societal pressure on such a small percentage of the population? Most high tiers will probably not know any other high tiers besides their parents. Take Wellston Private High School for example: it’s the most prestigious private school around, and canonically has the “highest concentration of high tiers in the region”. There are six high tiers in Wellston. Apply this to god tiers specifically, and there are only three. Not to mention that this current group of students is uniquely strong, even for Wellston. In Rei’s senior year, he was the strongest at 5.8 max.
So much of this brainwashing relies on the parents to do all of the work, and it only takes one or two people to break the cycle. So how are the authorities creating this immense pressure? One tactic could be by isolating high tiers. There is a very widespread concept that one shouldn’t associate with those outside their level range. A caste system like this that affects everyone is much easier to create and maintain than an expectation for a small group, and it also means that high tiers are only being influenced by those who are also high level. This creates an echo chamber. I’ve researched cults and how they brainwash victims, and the first step in the process is isolating them in exactly this way.
But, if there are so few high tiers, how the hell are they supposed be isolated from other groups? The answer is that high tiers are just isolated in general. Take a look at Arlo: his only friend is Remi, and even her, he keeps at an arm’s length. Arlo is only close with Remi in the first place because he was close with Rei, who, at the time of meeting Arlo, was presumably close in level with him. [EDIT: I forgot about Holden, which I think says a lot about his relevance. He is kept at more than an arm’s length and doesn’t seem to have any actual influence on Arlo, let alone a deep relationship. He is also not presented as an equal.] Take a look at Seraphina: before meeting John, she didn’t seem to have any friends other than possibly Arlo. Seraphina and Arlo pre-John seemed to have had more of a professional relationship, and while they were not close in level, Arlo did fit the bill of being a fellow god tier, and strong enough to also be brainwashed.
Now let’s look at Remi. In episode 60, Cecile says to Remi: “And yet here you are... Always hanging around those two monkeys, Blyke and Isen. Letting them treat you as an equal even though you’re in a completely different league.” This struck me as odd because, aside from Cecile herself, the Wellston students closest in level to Remi were Arlo, Blyke, and Isen. And who is she friends with? She actually was doing a pretty good job at following that social convention, unless Cecile wanted to be friends with Remi, which she clearly didn’t. But... her friends were still not close enough to her level. Was she supposed to just not have friends at all? The answer seems to be a resounding yes. Can you think of any genuine friends that Cecile has either?
Friendship simply isn’t considered a necessity for high tiers.
But... why is it that Arlo and Seraphina were brainwashed differently? Creating a societal norm for an isolated group of people is one thing, because those people’s mindsets feed into each other. Putting pressure on individual families to keep them in line, but doing it all in different ways? That would be near impossible. My theory is that Seraphina recieved the typical high tier brainwashing, and that Arlo was raised differently because he was being groomed to work for the authorities. Seraphina didn’t have a set career path planned out for her, but if she’s trying to be “perfect” by the standards of those controlling her, she’s bound to end up going in a direction that pleases them. Arlo on the other hand was specifically planned to become an authority figure. That’s why his brainwashing is so centered on leadership. Also, growing up with direct contact to the authorities makes it more possible for them to customize his brainwashing in this way.
But does all of this apply to high tiers in general, or is it specific to god tiers? Let’s take a look at the high tiers in Wellston. We have Seraphina, John, Arlo, Terrence, Remi, Cecile, and Blyke. John is a unique circumstance because he wasn’t raised by high tiers, so we’ll cross him off the list. Terrence was also unique, so we can cross him off as well. Remi was different from the norm as well. Why is that? Well, Remi actually wasn’t raised by high tiers either. Rei said on screen that both of his parents were elites. We can cross Remi off. Blyke doesn’t fit the bill either, but that’s easy to explain. He was an elite for a large part of the story, and he shot up rather quickly. We don’t know much of his family, but he probably wasn’t expected to be a high tier at all, and was raised as an elite. (All of this also serves to emphasize how much of this brainwashing comes from a person’s parents.) That leaves only Seraphina, Arlo, and Cecile to look at.
Cecile does seem to have high tier brainwashing, but it’s not nearly as intense as with Seraphina and Arlo. She doesn’t seem “obsessive”, and she wasn’t one of the examples Remi mentioned in chapter 50. It’s clear that high tiers are brainwashed in general, but god tiers are kept on a much shorter leash. This makes sense, obviously, because keeping a population in control like that is less necessary the lower the level. However, it’s also a chicken an egg situation: god tiers are both more important to keep in control, and also easier to keep in control. It’s important to note just how many exceptions we had to cross off. People like Remi and Blyke aren’t actually that unusual— a lower leveled high tier is much more likely to have non-high tier parents, or to have not always been a high tier themselves, or just in general, to have way more day-to-day interaction with non-high tiers. The brainwashing gets more and more diffused the lower down the ladder you go.
#UnOrdinary#Arlo UnOrdinary#Seraphina UnOrdinary#no one else is really relevant enough to tag tbh#analysis#in this world the best thing to be is an elite imo#high tiers and low tiers suffer the most from this system#and elites have it better than mid tiers#so you’d probably have the best time as around 4.6 ish#upper elite but not too close to high tier#Ngl the isolation of high tiers is rlly sad#no wonder sera latched onto john like that after her character arc#makes me think about arlo and rei also#Ouch#there are more high tiers in the story i could’ve looked at but this wouldve gotten really long if i extended past current Wellston student#I did not know I had this much to say until I started typing#I was coming to conclusions as i was writing like#“Omg THAT explains what I was wondering abt w/ Remi and Cecile!!!”#Now i still don’t know how the authorities would go about creating these societal expectations to begin with#so I’ll leave that open ended#propaganda? Idk#Ykw should i tag remi too? Maybe i should tag remi#she’s kinda important here#remi unordinary
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Hiii everyone, say, how do your Hawkes go go about sharing their estate? If they do it at all? Is everyone free to come and go or are they more private? Or do they only invite their LI to stay? I'm curious!! :)
#lay rambles#my ocs#oc: liam hawke#oc: lilian hawke#both my hawkes are very social w their friends but i love comparing their boundaries around it#theres variation in rules for specific ppl with both of them ofc but theres still general differences#with liam its all very open and everyone can p much come and go whenever#they dont get extra keys (theyll get lost and he doesnt want randos finding them lol) but they know where to find the spare key#and bodhan and sandal and orana know to let them in whenever#hes very lenient in this this regard but he does have rules abt what he does and doesnt want them to do#mostly its about not making too much of a mess lol bc liam prefers to clean himself#(he doesnt trust the crew with his household and also he has particular ways of doing things and Hates when theyre done differently)#so things like keep your dirty garb at the entrance dont cook by yourselves (this was banned after they did it one (1) time lol) etc#also no fucking allowed. do that somewhere else for the love of the maker he does NOT want to walk into that in his own house#(and it also comes back to liam not trusting them with cleaning but also Not wanting to clean that up lol)#also he is not fond of them going into his room uninvited. most of the house is chill but that is *his* space#he accommodates these rules by e.g. having spare slippers and a little washing basin in the entrance hall for dirty shoes/feet#always makes sure to have snacks in stock that he knows they like#food will have notes abt what to leave for leandra/orana/etc but otherwise food is prepared with his friends in mind#and in general he'll make sure to adjust the space/routine in little ways to accommodate them#(air out when fen isnt there cus he doesnt like drafts; keep curtains open cus anders prefers open spaces; etc)#lilian on the other hand doesnt like when her friends come into the estate without a heads up (cept for emergencies)#but once they have her 'ok' its basically mi casa es su casa#dont yknow. overdo it and get too rowdy but otherwise do whatever#however. she also expects everyone to clean up after themselves. she aint here to play maid and youre all adults#also liam has a general 'please try to not be too wild when leandra is here' and lilian doesnt#not cos she doesnt care but cos leandra is bothered by sth she can speak up herself#oh and lilian uses the basement space as temporary refuge for anyone who needs it (mostly escaped mages)#also side note: both offered gamlen to stay but he refused (out of pride/remorse)#...this got long and i ran out of tag space lmfao so this is it for now xD
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untapped comedy potential truly is hob gadlings siblings. he was born in Plagues England there's no way he didn't have em in the double digits. someone asks if he's intimidated by the number of in-laws and he cheerfully says that no these ones don't even bite. there's no way this guy wasn't annoyed into immortalality with righteous older siblings and annoying younger ones w the crazy look in his eyes.
#human dreamling aus w a quiet hallmark movie romance w them begone#where's the ones where he slams the door open and yells HEY MA LOOK AT THIS WEIRD FISH I CAUGHT#and promptly gets yelled at to stop slamming the door#dream vs the in laws part 2 except this time the the problem is the in laws like him too much#i have a very clear vision of what hobs mother would be and its someone who'd meet him n the 21st century and twist his ear and start yelli#“WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO”#idk about everyone else but i hc the eldest sister is a haughty girl named avarice who liked tattling i see it very clearly in my mind#the sandman#hob gadling#the fish in the earlier tags being dream of course#dream of the endless
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I'm actually so obsessed with him it's not even funny if i'm not listening to a TikTok or music directly related to him I can't focus free me free me
This is @/cherubpuppet's OC for a object show [au? pitch? wip show? How do I categorize this] and I've been destroyed by the fact that ruler art is infinitely superior [and 10x longer] and i don't have a good enough grasp on lip gloss's personality to make fanfiction so I am frozen in "want make fanart but fanart takes effort :["
#also object shows are the new mlp community change my mind /ref#from what ive seen a very large part of the community is centered around death/gore or mature topics? it reminds me of the mlp infection au#that and smile hd and everybody keeps saying object shiws are kids shows - if kids are making this stuff then good for them /gen#every fandom has its toxic/proship/18+ side obviously but from my pov gen alpha needed something they coudl handle age appropriate extremes#with - its just alot harder to make compelling emotional angst/gore with newer ultra sanitized shows or w/ mascot horror#and like thats a whole nother tooic but its obvious to me younger kids have flocked to mascot horror so harshly because average kids tv is#much more afraid of tackling any big topics to the point that the ones that DO [bluey] immediately are pushed into front and center#but i mean i also rewatched a few episodes of the shows i grew up with and ngl i think we need shit like ren and stimpy and invader zim#i hate ren and stimpy and i didnt grow up with zim but i grew up with pbs kids shit and that shit looking back was hella boring i never#cared for any of the tv shows i saw aside from elmos world and even then i was hoping that something gorey would happen. at like 5 yrs old#im rambling anyway im not sure if im actually going to get into the os communitg but i AM horribly attached to tape to the point that its#maybe possibly becoming harmful to my mental health so im gonna stick around for him for like months#just know that if im not posting anything its because im obsessed with this guy#oh also DID/MALE SA REP LETS FUCKIN GOOO#I LOVE PSYCHOLOGY AND IVE HAD LIKE 4 FRIENDS WITH DID/OSDD I NEED MORE POSITIVE REP OF STIGMATIZED/COMPLEX DISORDERS !!!!!#art#tape dispenser#search for smos#talk talks#EDIT NO. NO DONT SAY IM THE ONLY PERSON ON TUMBLR WHO HAS USED THE SMOS TAG NO. OH MY GOD#PLEASE BEING OBSESSED WITH SOMEONE ELSES OC IS SO GARD DONT LEAVE ME ALONE DO I NEED TO BUILD THIS FANDOM FROM THE GROUND UP??? NOO
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they keep me warm on cold nights / we must be quite a sight all tangled, wow
yayyy finished this just in time! this server exchange was so fun and i had such a good time making this for @oloreandil omg im so excited to have gotten you as my giftee!!! ILYSM i hope i did your prompt justice!
#death note#wammy boys#nearlymellodramattic#nate river#mihael keehl#mail jeevas#near death note#mello death note#matt death note#natebit#meronia#mellodramattic#my art#full color#i fully have no idea what the polyam tag for these three is oops! love them tho theyre so cute... theyre gonna eat matt alive#i had so much fun w this!!! months in the making ive been ON THE GRIND. i broke 100 layers on this piece someone get the champagne#the bg gave me some grief but as soon as i did a pink gradient iwl oh. of course. she never fails me. i always come CRAWLING BACK TO HER#idk why i ever bother w anything else. she is the Moment. pink gradient bg you will Always be Famous#ANYWAY YAYYY very possibly my final art of 2023!!! we shall see. a good note to end on if it is!#hehe. note >:o)c#LYRICS IN THE CAPTION ARE FROM MY GIRLFRIENDS GIRLFRIEND BY TYPE O NEGATIVE. OBVIOUSLYYY <3 <3 <3
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I’ve always loved medicine bc it’s the perfect intersection of science and humanity—the two things I value above all else in this world. Truly adored it since I was in the cradle. But now I’m thinking about how so much of my journey to neurosurgery will have to involve KILLING my feelings essentially bc how do you survive otherwise
#Not to mention the surprisingly high suicide rate of surgeons that’s been brought to my attention lately#Honestly I just started my neuro internship and just saw my first patient in clinic#And on the day I did I was critical of my neurologist for being so robotic about it#Now I can see why#I’m still at a point where I can’t even do a chart review for a patient without feeling so fucking sad#And I can see how that can get unsustainable after a while#But it’s like if I kill the feelings that drive my passion for medicine to begin with then what’s the point#It’s not like I’m in it for the money or prestige bc that’s so dumb considering how long the schooling is#But literally how to deal#My supervisors at the clinic very much all speak about the dementia patients w a learned impartialness#But I don’t wanna be that way one day :( but how to be anything else and still survive#I’m pre med so I still have time and maybe my opinion will change and I’ll wanna do another specialty#But when it comes to this every specialty will involve human lives and navigating that regardless#That said I can see why surgeons are at higher risk or depression suicide etc#The whole point of this internship is to teach myself how to navigate this stuff but. Hate it#p#med tag
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POOR GABRIEL MONTEZ! YOU NEVER SAW THIS COMING DID YOU? ALL YOU WANTED WAS POWER. SECURITY. SAFETY. & THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU GOT! JUST IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR BODY. LETS JUST HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS JUST HOPE YOU WONT HAVE TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw gore#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi suckening#jrwi gabriel#jrwi gabriel montez#LOOK FAMILIAR?hahahahahDONT WORRY#IM REUPLOADING THIS HERE BC i fixed up the drawing a lil. and also i wanted to add main tags#U WONT SEE ANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THISSUN N THE POST ON MY SIDEBLOG.i changed the image there too.HA!!!!!!!#ANYWAY.i rambled plenty about pain and gabe on my sideblog.SO LETS TALK ABT THE ART SHALL WE.ihad i very hard time getting the colors down#would u believe i nearly left this uncolored??FUCKED UP!! it was only a sketchhow did it end up like this. it was only a sketch...#BUT IM RLY GLAD I WENT W COLORING IT.this time i actually used the airbrush n pencil tools BUT i also have a handy dandy brush i made#its just the mspaint air brush tool. fucking LOVE THAT THING. but now its in fire alpaca and it can be slightly transparent.IT LOOKS SOGOOD#perfect for splatters and grime.i love you mspaint i love youuu.im also so happy w the blood here.i think i reached a shift last year#back when i made that genloss fanart something abt the way i draw blood finally CLICKED and im like OH. the inside must always be darker.#like i KNEW that already but it was like my hand itself finally had it click.i wonder what i will learn next?I LIKE THE ORGANS HERE TOO#not as veiny or thready as i usually draw em. but i think thats fine. not as WET as id like em to be but thats also fine.#i got the point across. the point ofc being WOW THIS IS GRUESOME AND PAINFUL AND TERRIBLE#I LOVE HIS EXPRESSION.i love pain and thinking abt pain. you lose yourself to it after enough time passes of just being in an ocean o agony#at one point its just too tiresome to scream or writhe. theres a point when the body accepts it.sometimes.atleast.#OHHH GABRIEL AS A CHARACTER DELIGHTS ME SO MUCH.he is a dog to me.a thing to serve others.I WISH I KNEW MORE#WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT BOY?? SURE POWER AND SECURITY AND SAFETY ARE NICE.BUT DID YOU HAVE DREAMS? WANTS? PASSIONS?#WHAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND THAT TIGER TATTOO ON YOUR ARM?WHAT DO THE DOGTAGS SAY BOY?I WISH I COULD HAVE TEA W U#OHHH TO SIT DOWN WITH A CHARACTER AND JUST SPEAK TO THEM. AND YET. AND YET IN THE END ITS ALL TRAGEDY AND COMEDY#TRAGEDY AND COMEDY THAT IS SO SO PAINFULLY UNBALANCED. SIGH.#WHATEVER CMERE BOY YOURE BECOMING AN OC OF MINE NOW UR GONNA BE IN SPACE AND UR NAME IS GONNA BE VINEGAR#UR STILL GONNA BE SHIP OF THESEUSED THOUGH. OOOHHH GABRIEEELLL GABRIEL MONTEEEZZZ#HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE BUILT INTO YOU.HOW MANY DID YOU LOVE AND CHERISH.HOW MANY TATTOOS DO U RECOGNIZE ON UR NEW ARMS#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? ON THE NIGHT U WERE SIRED?WERE YOU EXCITED? DID YOU SEE YOUR BOSS' FACE?WHAT WAS THIS PROMOTION LIKE?
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