#what do you expect him to do?? kill the bat he's married to as well????

[thegreatyin]

february. babe. with all due respect. i love you dearly. but this is cowards talk

[shanastoryteller]

happy winter time! naruto, dealer's choice. thank you!

a continuation of 1

Sakura is terrified that she’s going to mess this up.

Naruto’s never been mean to her, and has complimented her hair several times, but they’re not really friends. Back when she was friends with Ino, she’d see her at the Yamanaka compound sometimes and they’d play together, but she doubts Naruto remembers that.

Sakura doesn’t think she and Sasuke have ever had an actual conversation. He used to be the center of all their competitive crushes, to his hilarious dismay, but then he got betrothed to Naruto and no one was willing to piss off the hokage’s daughter by flirting with her fiance.

Well, besides Ino, but everyone knows she does it just because Sasuke hates it and Naruto feels duty bound to defend him.

Also because Shikamaru ended up taking Sasuke’s place as Cutest (and Available) Boy and Ino would rather stab herself in the eye than bat her eyelashes at Shikamaru, even if that means there’s a social game she can’t win.

Sakura's on a team with son of the Uchiha clan head and the hokage’s daughter, Rookie of the Year and Top Kunoichi, and their sensei isn’t even some normal jounin, but the Inuzuka clan head.

Tsume-sensei seems dismayed when they pass, although Sakura thinks she should have expected this. Naruto and Sasuke have been working as a team for even longer than they’ve been engaged.

Maybe she’s just surprised that they folded Sakura in with them instead of leaving her behind. Honestly, she’s pretty surprised by that too.

“Does this mean we get a dog?” Naruto asks brightly as Sasuke picks twigs out of her hair. “Mom says I only get one pet and doesn’t believe me that the frog doesn’t count.”

“No,” Tsume-sensei snaps, then, “Maybe, I don’t know. I hadn’t actually expected that I’d have to train you, fuck.”

Sakura can’t see this going well.

~

Naruto walks home with Sasuke, because her mother is working late to avoid her father and her father is working late to avoid the fact that her mother is working late to avoid him.

She wishes they’d just get a divorce. Maybe they will now that she’s legally an adult. Maybe she’ll move out and take herself out of the equation.

She won’t. But she thinks about it a lot.

“Maybe it’s good that it’s Tsume,” she says. “Sakura’s biggest weakness is her conditioning and you know that Tsume will train us into the dirt.”

Sasuke hums. “Maybe we should introduce her to Gai.”

She stares. “Do you hate Sakura?”

“She’s fine,” he says dismissively. “It’s too bad we didn’t get Hinata, but both my father and hers would have thrown a fit and gone to complain to yours. He’s the best at taijutsu, if she joins Team Nine’s morning workouts then she’ll be up to par in no time.”

“If it doesn’t kill her,” Naruto says dryly. “Why don’t we see what Tsume cooks up first, yeah? The first chunin exam is months away. She has time.”

“How do you know Tsume will sign us up for that one?” he asks, although by the glint in his eye he already knows.

Naruto answers anyway. “Tsume is going to take the first opportunity to get rid of us that she can, which would be the chunin exams. She’ll be praying for us to either pass or die.”

He laughs, a breathy sound that wouldn’t qualify coming from anyone else.

They arrive at the Uchiha compound and she stares at it wistfully. After helping uncover the almost betrayal, every Uchiha is nice to her now. The compound is so warm and bright and everyone is happy to see her and there’s always somewhere she can go.

“You can join me,” Sasuke says. “Mom always makes extra.”

Just in case she shows up.

“They’ll be expecting me to be home after the test,” she says, trying not to sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

Sasuke nods, a pinched look on his face that she pretends not to notice.

When they get married, she hopes they live in the compound.

[zerzurianspy]

in my hc BLU spy is a cis lady and BLU sniper is her husband and they love each other + they are ace4ace

i love BLU spy and my headcanon BLU spy, because if she is a woman then it was even more difficult for her to make a career as a spy, as she, obviously, was told to go bake some baguettes and was french flag, and then she said je m'en fous and began her work

i think that she is a biromantic, but it's hard for her to find a man not only because she does not like them much, but also because they do not like her as well, bc))) she is)) """masculine"""(you know how it is, in our société if a woman refuses to wear dresses, do her makeup and nails + is shorthaired she is considered masculine) AND SNIPER IS LIKE A MOUSE THAT LOOKS AT A BAT AND SAYS "SHE IS AN ANGEL"

(i do not plan on making her design "feminine" bc i like the idea of her being like mulan whose jaw gets sharper when she is a soldier, so when my BLU spy is masked she looks less like a woman)

and besides looking like a man she also "acts like a man" or who is the boss, as she basically doesn't want to be a traditional wife and a mother of 19373038320073261701928483030328 children, however it does not mean that she is girlboss and etc. her and sniper are equal, they just do not look like "husband and wife"

she can't give birth not only because of her occupation, but also because she does not want to, she can't cook because she is similar to RED spy(who had managed to actually burn the water) she won't wear dresses and heels because it's uncomfortable

i do not want this all to sound like she was repressed but then she met a man(!!!) and he """"fixed her"""" and cured "all this feminism" or that she is a ♀️sTrOnG aNd InDePeNdEnT wOmAn💪 because she does not need no man(1!1!!1!!!1!!!!1) which was written like shit so many times, i just want to write atypical female character......

in my hc both RED and BLU scouts are RED spy's sons(RED scout is the son of a lady in blue and BLU scout is the son of a lady in red) and BLU spy becomes blu scout's mother, or more likely "father", due to the mann co. being male dominated company, figure and a mentor to him, teaching him how to handle the team and missions, and there she is also like a maleficent because she TRIED to push scout away because: he not her sob + she is not a mother material, as being a mother is what she avoided all her life(I SWEAR THIS IS NOT "THE STORY OF A WOMAN WHO ACCEPTED HER MOTHERHOOD")

but... he is so smol and s ad... :(

i like and do not like this, because i do not want her to be forced to be a mother, but i LOVE found family and father / son or father / daughter, or mother / daughter, or mother / son dynamic💔��

and as for BLU sniper, he is basically fluttershed from pony.mov- the difference between him and RED sniper is that RED sniper looks like he can kill you and he will kill you, but BLU looks like he is a cinnamon roll ON A PURPOSE and he will kill you, he just invites you in his van to drink coffee with him and once you enter it you won't leave it :')

and yes, they are lovebirds, a married couple, murder spouses, crazy in love and etc. because, as i said, sniper loves spy for who she is, he is completely alright with her wearing her balaclava around him even if she plans on not taking it off all her life, which, honestly, made spy's jaw drop, as she. well. didn't expect that. but here he is loving and accepting, and she didn't just look at him and think aw what a wet cat... she fell in love with him and loves everything about him

so ye

snprsp🇫🇷💙🇦🇺

[daintylovers]

obsessed with the idea of snow x reader x lucy

like how you meet lucy first, being part of the covey

so obviously lucy and you are pretty close right off the bat

its a running joke around twelve that you guys will get married and somehow have children

its said with cruel intent but lucy sees it as the best possible future she could have

i mean why wouldn't she want to spend the rest of her life with you? she's already spent this much of it doing the same

all you two need to communicate with is one little look

its a furrow of the brows from her and wide eyes from you

lucy isn't a naturally anxious person- carefree and wild is more her lane

but when it comes to you, she can't help but almost mother hen you

always watching out for you during her concerts

and she won't hesitate to get in a fight with a local if it means getting his attention away from you

her worry only increases when she gets reaped

her first thought isn't even about herself

it's about you

if she's gone, you become public domain again

and the pair of you have made plenty of enemies who are just itching to get you alone

but before she can even take her first steps up the stairs a hand shoots out from the audience

someones taking her place- thank god

but, no, not thank god at all

in fact, there probably isn't even a god because if there was, then it wouldn't be you whose hand was raised

as if things couldn't get worse for the songbird

she gets ushered away and the two of you cross paths

she goes out to try to get a grip on you, but the guards yank her away

it's weird because she almost feels betrayed?

how could you do this to yourself? to her? how is she supposed to live if you aren't by her side?

as you make your way up the stage, every piece of you cracks in some way or another

the games have already begun to shape you into a monster

lucy can see it in your eyes, the light faded out

later on, after a day or so of travel, you've decided to try and forget about lucy

it will be easier to die without the reminder of what you've left behind

but also easier to kill, if you have no one who remembers the way you used to be

you've barely talked to the male from your district

in fact, you don't really recognize him

but when he sees you staring, he calls out your name

your stone-cold face doesn't make a change, so he tells you that he knows lucy

fuck

that he's heard all about you and will try to protect you as best as he can

well- so much for forgetting about her

you tell him you don't need his protection and try to shrug him off

it hurts more than you thought it would

the boy wakes you up when you arrive at the capitol

you don't bother to learn his name, it will be easier to kill him if you aren't attached

stepping out of the train car, you see a tall blonde man wearing a ridiculous amount of red pacing around with something in his hands

it's clear he isn't meant to be there, so you don't pay him any mind

but when he turns around and sees the boy from your district, he knows that the smaller figure beside him must be you

his tribute

as soon as he witnessed your little display of love for lucy, the longing looks the two of you shared before being ripped apart, he knew he was in luck

knowing the name of the person you clearly loved most would help him shape you into a nasty little thing for the arena

you would be the key to the plinth price money after all

but jesus you sure are smaller than expected

i guess television does make everything look grander

he calls out your name, but you don't turn to face him

he tries again and gets a little frustrated at the lack of acknowledgment he receives

so he moves to tap you on the shoulder, but as soon as one of his slim fingers meets your shoulder, you swing at him

I'm taking closed fist knuckles out hard as hell swing at him

obviously, it takes him by surprise, and on the impact his head goes flying to the side and he stumbles back, the rose he had been holding dropped from his grip

you move to keep walking forward but he recovers himself and practically yanks you around back to him, holding you away from him like a stray cat

glaring up at him, you still don't say anything, making him feel more uneasy than if you would have started screaming at him

he tries your name again, maybe the television got your name wrong?

but when he says your name for the final time, your eyes water

it's subtle, something only a man like snow would recognize

he said it just like lucy would

except lucy would be holding you tighter

she would feel warmer

this man feels cold, isolated, and dangerous

he introduces himself and you almost laugh at the irony, snow, of course his name is snow

well it's not fully snow, of course he has a first name

but snow suits him better

he tells you that he's your mentor, here to help you win the games

he offers you the rose that he's retrieved from the ground but you don't take it

please is all he says

and maybe it's because he reminds you of the comfort lucy would have given to you, or maybe it's because he just looks positively pathetic, groveling like a little kicked puppy, that you take the damned rose from his awaiting hands

he smiles at you, flashing pearly whites

a sting of insecurity shoots through you, your teeth definitely looked like a lemon compared to his shiny ones

just another reminder of how different you two really are

thank you, you offer him, you're covey and covey know their manners, even in the face of their oppressors

you turn to leave him again, but can still feel his presence close behind

looking around you notice that he's the only mentor here

it makes you feel uncomfortable

now there was a huge target on your back

and that fear is confirmed when you hop into the truck and are met with snickers and glares from your peers

and snow only makes things worse when he jumps in with you all at the last minute

maybe if you don't interact with him, they'll see that you are still one of them

still just a lowly district kid with no other option

you watch as he gets ganged up on and when he looks at you with pleading eyes, a hint of guilt racks you

but he's capitol, you remember, and capitol wouldn't save you either

so you let them at him

but when the truck car starts to tilt, he still moves to protect you, shoving the kids off him and caging you in his arms

his tribute will not die because of shitty driving

everyone tumbles out of the car and into the wild

and when snow pulls you up and away, you see that it really is the wild

you are now caged in some lame forest area?

you aren't really sure what it is because the crowd outside the cage is really throwing you off

and then you see the camera crew and the happy announcer in the middle

but the guy also sees you and snow, locked in each other's embrace

it mortifies you, lucy will see this

you detach yourself as quick as lightning and make your way to the man, who is equally as curious about you as you are about him

and who might you be? wait, hold on, we know you, you're the girl from twelve who sacrificed herself for her lover. tell me, do you regret it?

every part of you screams to spit in his face, how dare he use you like bait for the audience?

but two can play that game

i would never regret saving someone i love. would any of you? lucy gray, i miss you every day, and I'll continue to miss you even when I'm gone and grey.

A/N: tumblr is yelling at my computer and saying this is too long so I've cut it in half. but if you want more let me know because i love this dynamic and i barely explored it here lmfao. had to lay the ground work yk! anyways, lot of love <3

[eldritch-spouse]

What happens if the icons meet their queen's parents?

The Icons meet your parents

Your relationship with the icons has to be spectacularly good for that to be an eventuality. Or not, perhaps you made a deal to arrange this regardless of the current compatibility level, equally plausible. It's also worth considering the other side's opinion. While it is likely that your parents always wished for you to find happiness and marry one day, none of them could ever expect you to marry a Ringlord. To a very religious and uninformed parent, that's the equivalent of saying you're engaged to Satan... But, let's say your parents love you very dearly, and they're willing to accept this very unexpected development in your life.

Your dear Lord/Lady will invite them over for a day's stay...

They need to be escorted too, lest they end up getting torn to pieces or seeing some unsightly things.

Rinx believes he won't have to do much to make a good impression on your folks, but make sure to remind him that keeping everything in huge piles next to the front of the mansion will make it seem as if you live with a hoarder (which you do, but alas, this hoarder has imps to keep things tidy). He'll ask you about your parents' tastes and make a list of small presents for them upon their arrival. This takes some effort, as Rinx is naturally stingy- Spoiling his Queen is different from spoiling literally anyone else. Be sure to reward him for his generosity! He makes decent conversation, usually about either you or the things he's collected in his lifetime. He maaaay steal something from your parents, just bat his meaty hands away from personal belongings.

Cero wants everything so perfect he's going to overwork his imps to death. When you jab at him, he claims he always demands the best, it doesn't matter that your parents are coming over. The first thing he does is give them a tour of the whole mansion, talking his elbows off in a way he hopes will impress, but ending up confusing your poor relatives. While he can't help always being a tad judgemental, he tries not to let it show as much as usual. Your parents are waited on just as you and Cero are, it's uncomfortable for everyone involved. Conversation consists of gloating about how lucky you are to have him, and how proud of your choice in a partner your parents must be. Cero is visibly trembling and twisting with the urge to correct your parents' abysmal table manners. You think he's going to have an aneurysm.

Kalymir deafens them upon arrival. He's very eager to show off his massive trophy hall, displaying his scars, weapons and all the things you've killed too! It's gruesome, might spoil their appetite. You have dinner on the highest platform of his ring, where there's a view to the main arena, which is always buzzing with violence. He may jab at your parents for being squeamish, or cringing at his vocabulary, but it doesn't get scathing like it does with many others, he's in a good mood. Hopefully your parents enjoy fun pastimes like beheadings and living piñatas. He's going to ask if they plan to move in. Oh, of course, the lizards will also be introduced. Kalymir talks about his conquests and the wildest things that have happened in Wrath. Overall, he'd say it went swimmingly.

Vesper has been thoroughly warned to eat very well the day before your parents arrive, because you won't be touching him with a ten foot pole once they're in Lust. No pheromones or hypnotism in the mansion, no exposed sex toys either. He's suffering. Vesper can make good conversation, at least. He's a little too touchy and underdressed, which is uncomfortable for your poor parents, but he legitimately doesn't know how to be any other way. Feel free to tell him to tone it down, regularly. Since Vesper's not really eating at the table, he's going to be doing a lot of talking, trying to pick conversation topics that aren't too scandalous. Might as well talk about his writings and love of theater plays. He may escape at some point while you show them the mansion so he can have a quickie.

Zizz is loaded on so many fucking energy supplements, he's a living battery, you think he might start glowing at any moment. This means he has the ever rare sloth zoomies when they show up. He's all over the place, taking your parents around the entire mansion way too fast, probably picking them up in the process, ranting on and on about the complexity of dreams while he hands them several blankets and pillows and where is his Queen?? The only time he does slow down is during dinner, where he may actually fall asleep while your parents talk. A bit rude, but hopefully you've warned them about it. When Zizz becomes coherent again, he's able to have normal, pleasant conversation with them. He gifts them the most pleasant dreams for a week straight and they're shown the fluffiest guest rooms.

Livius functions by wanting to know every possible thing about your parents he can. He pays close attention to what you say, and definitely mimics bits and pieces of your posture as they arrive. Only a bit of conversation is necessary for him to start blending in. Your mother is flowery and open-minded? Yes, so is he, the two of them are holding glasses of wine like long-time friends. Your dad likes fishing and fixing cars (*wheeze*)? Him and Livius are setting up the grill. He's also a tad too keen on physical contact, but not as much as Vesper. The King surprises your parents by mostly making conversation about you, they come out of it knowing very little about him other than the fact that he loves you and is very socially adaptable.

Vorticia spoils your parents with food so good they might want to stay for longer. It's a huge meeting, all her kids are there, the mansion is full and loud and she's soaking up the attention. Your parents get to meet so many people they'll probably get exhausted. She's admittedly sweet to them, though a little too insistent that they eat more. It's a bit rude of them to only peck around (your parents are bloated like balloons, she's insane)... Conversation revolves mostly around being a parent, responsabilities, the joys of good food and a big family. It's all fun and games until she forgets there's humans in the mansion and just fucking eats someone alive. Oops. She also gets a tad drunk towards the end. Thankfully, her kids are there to take the reigns, the youngest has not stopped talking.

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

Wiggly Wednesday!! 🧠🪱

I was tagged by @matchingbatbites and @just-my-latest-hyperfixation on previous wiggly wednesday posts but I really haven't been having many new thoughts... UNTIL TODAY THAT IS

this week i've been thinking a lot about a (st)eddie fallout au.

i've been thinking about sole survivor!steve who marries a whip smart lawyer at the request (demand) of his and her parents once it's found out the harrington name can't keep him out of the war.

they shove the two together, she ends up pregnant just like their families wanted, and once back from the front lines, he tries his damndest to settle into his new life with his new family (and brand new son, Dustin, the goddamn light of his life), only for the bombs to drop.

on the other side of things is ghoul!eddie who served in alaska but lost half his leg and was sent home (he has since fitted an assaultron leg in its' place).

i think it'd be hilarious if he somehow finds a wig almost exactly like his old hair but that's a little worse for wear so he sews it into the lining of a black cowboy hat (they're practical alright?) and every time he meets someone he sweeps his hat off into a bow in an effort to make them laugh when his winkled bald head makes an appearance.

Steve, who leaves vault 111 and heads out from sanctuary soon after he realizes Codsworth doesn't have much to tell him about where that blond motherfucker had taken his infant son.

he heads into concord with his old baseball bat fitted with some new rusty nails and a german shepard trailing along behind him.

he sneaks around through the side streets to get past the majority of raiders who have backed a group of people into the old museum, but runs smack into one of them, a woman about his age (well, how old he'd been when he was frozen, goddamn vault-tec bastards) with her choppy, dirty blonde hair shaved nearly down to the scalp on one side.

"Wait! Please, don't kill me." she says, immediately dropping the scuffed up 10mm she'd been holding.

He studies her, then their surroundings, his military training kicking back in, but he doesn't hear anyone nearby... this isn't a trap?

"Please, they killed off my family and I either had to join them or they'd kill me too."

He looks her over, grabs her arm and pulls her under a dilapidated set of stairs, "How many are inside?"

"At least four adults, maybe a kid too."

"A kid?! are you serious?!"

"They're raiders! What do you expect!"

Steve huffs, does another scan, "Okay, c'mon, we can get through them, right? Can you shoot that thing?" he gestures with his chin to where her gun still lays.

She rolls her eyes, "Of course I can, dingus. You think I'd've survived this long if I couldn't?"

She scoots out from under the steps, Steve's "How should I know?!" following her trail of dust.

"I'm Robin, by the way."

"Steve." he says, standing too and hefting his bat onto his shoulder "Now let's go!"

-x-

They get through the museum, looting every possible thing they can from Robin's 'Friends' as they go, all the way to where the survivors have barricaded themselves.

The door opens easily, to Steve's surprise, he'd thought they'd ask more questions, but when the sawed-off is pointed into Robin's face, he thinks otherwise.

"Hey! Whoa! We just saved you!"

"What do you want, a sweet roll? She's a raider." the woman says, face pinched, hair tied back tight.

"She was a raider." Robin says, hands still raised.

"Wheeler, let 'em through, you know damn well they just saved our asses."

The woman, Wheeler, apparently, drops her weapon and lets them through to their hiding place.

There are, in fact, four adults and a kid. Though 'kid' in this case is a gangly 15/16 year old with dark hair.

Along with him and Wheeler, there's also a man with with a long braid down the center of his back and caramel colored skin, and a pale man with disheveled, choppy hair of his own. Well, more disheveled than Steve figures he normally'd be.

"It's only a matter of time before more of 'em come." A brusque man, sat onto the little couch in one corner with his leg extended in front of him, continues. "We need more fire power. We need that damn minigun."

"You have a minigun?"

"Yeah, it's in my pocket, lemme just---" the man rolls his eyes after miming reaching into the pocket of his grubby jeans, "It's on the roof, and we cant really use it unless we have that power armor too."

Steve knew grabbing that fusion core from the basement earlier would be useful.

"I've got it. Which is the door to the roof?"

"You need a fusion core, dumbass." the teenager says.

"There's one in the basement if you--"

"I've already got it." Steve says, "Which way to the roof?"

-x-

He doesn't have a single clue what the fuck that thing was, but he killed it, and now their group is heading back to Sanctuary.

The guy with the braid, Argyle, says that he saw the perfect place to settle in in a vision, ("A fucking Jet-fueled vision." Wheeler grumbles, not at all convinced the place Argyle is talking about even exists.) and asks Steve and Robin for their help in getting there.

"Yeah, sure," he says, voice coming out tinny through the power armor's old helmet speaker. "I think I saw a place to the north that sounds just like that."

So he does, taking up the rear as Hopper, the big man with the mustache, limps along at the front with his injured leg on one side and Wheeler on his other.

Robin takes a spot in front of him as the teen, Mike, has taken the spot to his right that Steve keeps feeling like Robin should fill the longer they walk. He should ask her to come with him to find Dustin.

"What's it like in there, can you see? That thing really took a bite outta your arm, can you fix it?" more and more questions about Steve's armor that he does his best to answer without getting short.. but he's damn fuckin' tired.

They hobble into Sanctuary just as the sky begins to lighten; Wheeler starts off along the riverbank with her rifle in hand as soon as they cross the bridge, the other man, Jonathan, helping Hopper the rest of the way up the hill to the house Argyle points out to him; it's the Smiths' house, two doors down from his own.

Steve, however, trudges along at 10% power, all the way to the carport of the Johnsons' home, the yellow one across from his and Nora's.

He doesn't know why they suddenly have a power armor station here, but he's glad for it and for Robin following him to the stand.

"Hook one of those chains though each of the hooks on my shoulders? That way I can hoist this thing up after I get out."

She does, he punches the release, and groans as he back out of the contraption.

-x-

They spend the next couple days helping the settlers get settled into sanctuary, but Steve's itching to get out of this place, to find his boy.

Robin, now free of her ratty raider garb, jumps at the opportunity to go with him and the shepherd Argyle's taken to calling Dogmeat. So, after a cryptic lead from Argyle to find the heart glowing in the great green jewel, they head out.

One or five adventures later, Steve and Robin arrive at the giant green walls of Fenway Park.

"Ah Diamond City, she'll have answers, I'm sure."

"Are you serious? Diamond City is in Fenway? That's just perfect." Steve shakes his head, "The walls must come in handy at least."

"Uh, yeah, it's why everyone wants to get in." She says, gesturing to a woman outside the gate that's arguing with an intercom.

"Dammit Powell, you can't just kick me out, I live here!"

"Sorry Joyce, Brenner isn't happy with what you've been saying about him."

"So you just lock me out? My kid's in there! Let me in, dammit!"

The woman looks up as Steve and Robin approach, "Hey, you two, you wanna get in?"

Steve looks up at the big metal gate that's been affixed to the stadium, "Uh.. yes?"

"Okay, then play along," she whispers.

-x-

Joyce manages to get the gate opened, the Mayor of the town meeting them at the turnstiles and fighting with himself on coming off hostile to Joyce, but trying to seem welcoming to the newcomers.

He drops it eventually, lets them through, but the whole interaction is already nagging at Steve. He should get Joyce to move back to Sanctuary.. after they've gotten settled a bit more, at least.

She's sweet to them, gives them supplies, calls Steve 'Blue' ("Because of your suit, hon." Oh yeah.. he should get some new underclothes too, huh?), and sends them off to Valentine Detective Agency, the only place she knows that could possibly be the 'glowing heart' of Diamond City.

The two get Nick out of Vault 114 at the behest of his secretary, break into Creel's old house in the stands with Robin's stellar lockpicking skills, and are hot on Dogmeat's heels soon after, arriving at Steve's old musterpoint before the bombs dropped, Fort Hagan.

They fight through waves of laser-gun wielding robots, that Robin calls 'gen 2s', all the way trough the Fort only Steve knows was named after the father of an old friend of his.

The blonde bastard that Steve remembers seeing down in 111 bears so little resemblance to the deep fried looking piece of shit standing before him now, that he almost doubts what Valentine told him, but tall, viney, and creepy's monologue clears some of it up at least. Something called FEV causing his ghoulification to speed up..

Steve can't make hide nor hair of it.

Robin explains it to him after, the existence of ghouls at least, she's not sure what the fuck FEV is, while they're camped out on the roof of Fort Hagan, watching the goddman Prydwen float across the sky.

"They're people, most of 'em from your time, some from after, but they all get wrinkly and stuff. Noses fall off, all that."

"Are they the same zombie things that always try to kill us?"

"Yeah," she sighs, "All ghouls turn feral eventually."

-x-

They make their way back to Diamond City, telling Nick what they saw, what they pulled from Creel's busted open head.

"Y'know, I've got a friend in Goodneighbor that might be able to help with this. You two rest up, use Ellie's bed too if ya need to. She's out for the next couple days."

-x-

The trio head out the next day, arriving with little fanfare in Goodneighbor late that night.

They get through the gate, only to be accosted by some guy in leather pants and a leather jacket.

“Newcomers, huh? Y’get insurance yet?”

“Back off man, I don’t have time for this.” Steve says, stepping forward.

The guy pulls a knife brandishing it way too close to Steve’s gut. “Sounds like you don’t, newbie.”

“Whoa whoa whoa, man. Finn. What’d I tell you about this insurance shit?” The husky voice comes from behind this Finn character, and Steve turns his attention to the possible new threat.

It was a ghoul; Clunky boots, dusty black denim jeans, a leather jacket of his own, and a head of long, curly brown hair under a black cowboy hat.

“This ain’t none’a your business, Munson.” The brute says, turning his attention to the ghoul.

Munson saunters forward, “C’mon, Finn, no love for your Mayor?” He reaches a hand up and out, grabbing hold of Finn’s shoulder, then in a flash, grabs a knife from the holster on his thigh Steve failed to notice, and has plunged the blade deep into his gut.

Finn sputters, then drops to the ground, dead.

"I've always hated that guy." Munson says, then turns his attention to the trio, "Hey you three, Nicky, been a while."

"Yeah yeah, how are ya, Eddie?"

Eddie Munson the ghoul shrugs his shoulders, "Can't complain. How c'n I help ya? Any friend of Nicky's is a friend of mine."

"We're here to see Amari," Nick says, pushing forward and heading towards an alley past the Old Statehouse.

"Very well, Nicky dear," Eddie says, reaching for his hat and pulling it off his head to dip into a bow.

The sight startles a laugh out of Steve; Eddie's whole head of hair had come off with the hat, only wrinkled skin bare to the lamplight around them. Robin cringes, shaking her head and following Nick.

Eddie looks up at Steve's laugh, grinning wide as he passes, "Pleased to be the reason for a sound so sweet," he nods down into a bow again, then pulls straight, flipping his hat (and hair) back onto his head by the brim. With one, dark brown eye, Eddie winks at him, then turns back to the Statehouse.

-x-

And so, Robin and Steve continue on their adventures.

Hopper has been making strides to revitalize his group of minutemen, trying their damndest to help the people of the Commonwealth get back on their feet.

Joyce and her younger son reunite with her oldest in Sanctuary and she and Hopper definitely have something going on.

The eventually come across The Railroad, a group of people trying to help Gen 3 synths escape The Institute, led by a woman named Christine.

They cracked the code on their catacomb bunker (not that fuckin' hard if your make your password RAILROAD), and are stopped in their tracks by three women. Well, at least one is a woman...seriously, what's with these random teenagers running around with guns??

Whatever. The one with the shaved head is somehow holding a fuckin' minigun all on her own, the redhead on the other side of who must be the leader here has a sleek-looking comabt rifle, and the one in the center, the older one, says "Stop right there."

"We come in peace."

"How'd you find us?"

"Well, you've been leaving holotapes everywhere, it seems like.. so we just followed the Freedom Trail here like you wanted...?"

"You just guessed the password then?"

"Uh... yeah."

Another person enters then, another teenager. His complexion making it seem like he stepped clear out of the shadow on the wall behind him.

"Who are you? Lucas," the woman says, "I need intel. Who are these two?"

"You haven't heard of the Twinsters, Chris?"

"The Twinsters?" Steve and Robin repeat at the same time.

"Coined it myself," Lucas says with a grin, "Twin Twister; These two can tear into a town and within an hour have it cleared of ghouls, raiders, supermutants, you name it. You guys are twins aren't you?"

"Yes." they say in tandem, not giving it another thought. It's as good an explanation as anything for how close they've become.

"And you vouch for them?" Chris asks Lucas.

"One hundred percent. We could definitely use them on our team."

"And we really need your help, we have a courser chip, and we were told you could decrypt it?" Robin asks, interrupting whatever Chris was going to say.

Chris looks back at Robin, pauses a moment, then nods. "We'll see what we can work out.

ANYWAY before i get too lost in the sauce about this even more; Steve and Eddie start hooking up and Eddie's just as suave as Hancock is but nerdier, they take down the Prydwen and Elder Carver, Lucas El and Max visit Sanctuary as often as they can and make fast friends with Mike and Will along with Dustin once Steve gets him back from the institute after everything, Hop gets dadopted by El, Buckingham endgame, maybe jargyle and ronance too? but Steddie is the endest of game lmao

please enjoy this v basic moodboard the end

[newobsessioneveryweek]

Your headcanons are so cute!!!! 🥺🥺 (also about their friends thinking they're unhealthy, if Annabeth can judo-flip Percy and no one bats an eye, I think Sherman and Connor could probably get away with jokingly trash-talking eachother XD)

Sherman's love language being acts of service is so real btw. He'd probably try to do pushups with Connor on his back if Connor didn't completely refuse, because atleast one of them is smart enough to know that'd break Sherman's back 😭

(also.. you mentioned backstories?!?! my ears are open!! 👀👀)

Prev

I agree! How come Annabeth gets to break her boyfriend's spine on a whim but Sherman can't call Connor a loser?

Btw, the nature of their pet names are totally along that line. Sherman calls Connor loser and Connor calls him asshole. They've barely even dipped a toe into sweetie and honey cakes or the other sweet ones unless they're being ironic.

Sherman called Connor "dear" for the first time and Connor called him an idiot and told him to stop.

Connor: What's this 'dear' bullshit? It's fine when other people do it, but it just sounds weird coming from you. *shudders*

Sherman: then what the fuck do you want me to call you, dumbass?!

Connor: 'dumbass' is fine, just stick to the fucking formula!

Now they just do it to make their friends uncomfortable :]

Now...

You asked about their backstories...

You don't know what you've just unleashed. I know I'm the one who instigated this but I am also insane and should never be trusted with your mental wellbeing.

I made it very angsty for both of them

Here we go! Strap in!

Sherman’s backstory

⚠️⚠️Trigger Warning For Physical And Verbal Abuse And Violence⚠️⚠️ I've highlighted the triggering parts in red

So Sherman’s mother wasn't anything like the woman you'd expect the god of war to fall in love with. She was gentle and nurturing, and just all-around a non-confrontational person. But she still had a warrior’s spirit and fought for Sherman in other ways.

When Sherman was three his mother married a very well-off man who later abused her. Sherman didn’t know. His mother (her name is Bella) sometimes had bruises on her arms or face but she always said she fell or had some other accident.

When Sherman was seven and came home from school he heard his step-father shouting and peaked in through a window to find him yelling and hitting his mom. He got scared and hid behind the house until his father left in a huff (presumably to a bar). He came inside and saw his mother crying. When she saw him she wiped her tears and pretended nothing happened. Sherman didn’t say anything.

His step-father was never the most affectionate man but he wasn’t aggressive towards Sherman when he was growing up. But one evening a few years later Sherman woke up and heard crashing sounds and breaking glass downstairs. There was yelling too. He went downstairs to investigate and found his stepfather attacking his mother. His mother was bleeding from her head. His stepfather was swinging a bottle at her.

Sherman ran into the room to try and stop him. He yanked at his arm and started punching him but his father just turned and started hitting him instead, telling him that he’s useless and stupid and he’ll never amount to anything. At this point he’s kicking him in the stomach while he’s lying on the floor. When his mother recovers enough to stand she attacks him. She tells him to never touch her child again and starts beating at his back. He knocks her to the ground again and starts kicking her. Sherman panics and picks up a shard of a broken vase. He stabs his step-father in the leg.

When he falls down Sherman stabs him in the back of his neck and his shoulders. He dies. His mother is shocked. They hear sirens approaching. Apparently the neighbours had called the police. His mother tells Sherman to run, that she’ll tell the police that it was her that killed him. Sherman refuses but his mother’s insistence forces him to leave. She tells him how much she loves him and that they’ll see each other again soon. He spends a month on the streets before a satyr finds him and takes him to camp.

(He tells Connor that his mother was the bravest person he’s ever known.)

Connor’s backstory

⚠️⚠️ Trigger Warning For Parental Neglect, Self-Harm, Abuse, And Addiction⚠️⚠️

Connor’s mother, Ruelle, used to be an international interpreter/polyglot. She met Hermes at a business conference and they hit it off. When Travis was born she loved him like any mother would love their child. They moved to Virginia when she was pregnant with Connor and made friends with Julia and Marcus who were restaurant owners in town. They would always come around to make sure Ruelle was settled in properly and was taking care of herself and the baby. They would pick up Travis for play dates to give her space and alone time. When Connor was born everything was great for the first two weeks but then Julia started to get worried about Ruelle.

She would come over and Connor would be lying on the floor crying while Ruelle just smoked a cigarette in the kitchen. Julia checked on Connor and angrily asked Ruelle if she was even paying attention to Connor’s needs. Ruelle didn’t answer. Julia asked where Travis was. Ruelle said he was playing upstairs.

Julia insisted Ruelle go see a therapist. She refused and told Julia to mind her own business and worry about her own nephews. Julia said she couldn’t let these children suffer. Ruelle told her to just take them then. Julia did.

Travis and Connor stayed with Julia and Marcus for about two weeks before Ruelle called the police on her and told her that she kidnapped her children. Julia told the police that Ruelle was just confused and said she would return them to her care. She did so reluctantly. Julia and Marcus were worried. They taught Travis how to make baby formula and feed it to Connor just in case Ruelle wasn’t feeding them. They didn’t want to call child services because they wanted to give Ruelle a chance. She never went to therapy though and her mental state kept deteriorating.

Eventually after two months, upon Julia’s tearful insistence, Ruelle, also tearful, agreed to try therapy and started taking better care of Connor. However, on Connor’s first birthday both her parents died in a plane crash to visit her and she spiralled into a depression. She had the presence of mind to use the inheritance she received to pay off her mortgage but started neglecting the children. When Travis started going to kindergarten he had an excuse to leave the house and Julia could teach him to take care of Connor because Ruelle wouldn’t allow her near her house and would invite Travis over to her house to eat before going back home.

When Connor was two she married a man named John and together they spent their lives getting high and avoiding their responsibilities. John frequently beat Ruelle and went out to clubs and bars and partied and got drunk and cheated on her and all that jazz and because her life was so utterly shit she took out all her frustrations on her children. She would beat them, lock them in their room without food, force them to eat expired food and accuse them of trying to make her look bad if they didn't, and lock them out of the house at night.

Sometimes they would spend the night at Julia and Marcus but when they came back in the morning and Ruelle found out where they were she would go off at them and beat them up. John would just watch and not care because they were nothing to him. Once, when Connor was five, she broke his arm and didn’t take him to the hospital. She locked them in their room instead. When they woke up Connor’s arm was healed. At the time they didn’t know Hermes healed it while they were asleep.

⚠️⚠️Extra Trigger Warning For Self Harm⚠️⚠️

Their mother’s depression was still in full swing and she used to cut herself often. Connor and Travis would both walk in on her doing it and she would just look at them and say that they did this to her.

When Connor was turning six they ran away from home. They lived on the street for three years and were constantly chased by monsters and met shady people all the time. When Connor was turning 9, a satyr found them in New York and took them to camp.

(Connor hates his birthday because every year his mother would blame him and his brother for her life being so shitty because her parents died on their way to visit them and see their grandchildren for the first time.)

And that's that! Lemme know if you ever want me to reveal more stuff from my mind fic! Because I would love to :3🩷

[bluecatwriter]

How Good And Thoughtful

Ah, thank you for requesting this one, anon! I'm very fond of it.

"How Good and Thoughtful": "Earlier today, Jack Seward had to help kill Lucy's vampire, and now he's in the company of Mina Harker, working together to transcribe and assemble their diaries. He never expected to feel this close to someone he just met, and he's not quite sure how to handle his strong affection for his new friend."

-I put the quote from the book that inspired me at the beginning of the fic, with Mina narrating how Jack helped her get a typewriter set up so she could transcribe his diary. "How good and thoughtful he is; the world seems full of good men— even if there are monsters in it."

-Also I wanted to write this because Mina and Jack have, like, the best meeting of the whole book. They're in a romance novel except Mina's already in love with someone else. They meet at the train station, make extremely awkward small talk, Jack starts blushing furiously, he determines that he needs to keep information from her but five minutes later hands over his entire wax cylinder collection and then they read each other's diaries. I am obsessed with them!

-I'm also always gnawing away on the whole set-up of Jack and Mina spending the evening together alone in his study: Jonathan is halfway across the country tracking down boxes, and meanwhile Mina is having a sleepover with a handsome, well-bred young man whom Lucy thought she might be into— and no one, either in the story or in the way the narrative is presented, bats an eye! As someone who was raised in a very conservative environment where we were taught, explicitly or implicitly, "It is morally wrong for a woman to be alone with a man unless they're married— and this is the way it's always been!", this makes me unreasonably happy. 

-The first part of the fic is mostly logistics, putting dialogue to the summarized part of the book. I wanted to show that Jack is mostly in business mode here, trying to be helpful in any way he can.

-The canon image of Jack sitting with a book while she transcribed so she wouldn't be alone is very sweet to me, so I put it in the fic, too. Meanwhile, Jack, who is bone-tired under the best circumstances but also has been getting even less sleep (and more Horrors) than usual, begins to fantasize a bit about having Mina as a wife. As with Jack's attraction to Lucy, I think you can read his obvious rapport with Mina as being any sort of attraction— sexual, romantic, platonic— although in this fic, them getting along gets mentally slotted into the literally only category he has for a close female relationship, which is "wife."

-I wanted to make it clear that Jack is not being a creeper here, but is channeling his longing for companionship into the want for a wife (and trying very hard not to think too much about it).

-Of course Jack knows Mina is already married, and he's very excited to meet her (surely hunky) husband! I had fun imagining what kind of "strong young manhood" Jack might construct after reading Jonathan's diary. Anyone with such an iron nerve must be the kind of guy who could throw him against a wall, right…?

-Mina having to stop and stretch her hands after typing is my concern for her ligaments during all this typing she does during the novel (and shows up in some other fics, too). My girl is gonna get carpal tunnel if she doesn't stretch!

-I knew I wanted to have them touch in this scene, and figured that him rushing to help with a medical need (proper stretching technique for her hands) would be a good way to do that. I come from a family where we often give each other backrubs or foot-rubs or hand-rubs, so I have familial associations with it, but I liked that it could also be a little charged here just because massaging someone else's hands can feel pretty intimate.

-I diverged a bit from canon by having them stay up together reading through the newspapers; if I remember correctly, Mina does it by herself in the book. I liked how domestic the image was of them poring over newspapers together and reading each other snippets (sort of like how my spouse and I will scroll through our phones side by side, pausing only to show each other memes).

-Since the book has a theme of people falling asleep, I decided to have Mina doze off here (couldn't be me— I cannot sleep in a chair), which of course makes Jack feel a whole lot of other things. He's doing his best not to pine, but man.

-When he wakes Mina up and she says she's going to bed, I was very seriously tempted to veer from my original idea and let them just make out. But I decided to keep my original plan for a couple reasons: even if Mina said it was okay with Jonathan, it didn't feel believable to me for Mina and Jonathan to have discussed polyamory at this point so early in their marriage; it would've made the thing feel more like an AU rather than my vaguely-canon writings that I've compiled. Plus, I wanted the focus to be on their connection, not have the scene just be a jumping-off point for a romance (even though I might write something like the latter at some point). So I reined Jack in and kept going from there.

-I like the little conversation that Mina and Jack have here— it's so earnest and open. I was trying to convey the feeling when you meet someone and you just click and it feels like you've been friends all your life.

-I settled on Jack giving her a cheek kiss, which is still a very bold move for him but more restrained than a dubious makeout session. And then of course he feels terrible for it… but Mina understands and gives him a kiss back. One kiss is enough to make Jack crumple like a cheap paper napkin, so it's probably good I was restrained, anyway. ;) His immediate desire to "fall at her feet and sob into the folds of her skirt" was inspired by Jonathan doing just that later on in the story.

-I figured after all that, Jack needed Floor Time; I just see him as a guy who lies down a lot when he's trying to process things. (In the play I'm working on, his first entry is narrating while he's lying on his back on the floor.)

-A huge number of my fics end with the viewpoint character getting a good night's sleep. This is because 1) sleep is a big running theme in Dracula, and, more importantly, 2) I love sleeping and I want everyone else to get a good night's sleep, too. ;)

Thanks again for the ask!

(Ask game here)

[steddiebang]

Steddie Bigbang Weekly Round-up: November 1 - November 4

Remember Me, Love (when I'm reborn) Author: @stevebckley and on twitter / Artist: @fancycheliniarts and on twitter Steve Harrington was born an Alpha. Everyone in his life had expected him to be an Alpha so they weren't surprised

Everyone except himself.

After over two years of saving every spare dollar, Steve is finally ready to take the final leap to transition from the Alpha he appears to be, to the Omega he’s always known he is. When the clinic pairs him with Eddie Munson as the Alpha that is meant to help guide him through his transition, it only takes one meeting for Steve to realize that he may not want to let go of Eddie when it’s all over.

The Baby Project Author: miraculousmultifan / Artist: @danadaria. Steve turned around with a grin and propped his elbows up on Munson's desk. Then, before he could really think about the words coming out of his mouth, he said, “Guess that makes us married then, huh darling?”

Munson, of course, stared back at him blankly, but instead of backtracking or something, Steve batted his eyelashes for good measure, really hamming it up.

Munson blinked at him once. Then twice. Then he raised an eyebrow and said, deadpan, “What the fuck are you talking about?”

In the last month and a half of Steve's senior year, he gets paired up with Eddie Munson for the final project in Mrs. O'Donnell's Home Economics class. The assignment? To take care of a fake baby for four weeks. For some reason, Steve finds himself surprisingly excited. Eddie, not so much.

I Wanna Be Adored Author: @StrangerThings1975 / @strngrthngs1975 (twitter) / StrangerThings1975(ao3) / Artist: gimmekaseddie (twitter) / @gimmedemosteve (tumblr) Eddie thinks it would be cool to add a fake demon summoning ritual into his song lyrics. He thinks it’s even cooler when the summoning actually works... eventually. At first, though, he’s just wondering what the hell Steve Harrington is doing at his door.

“What is it exactly that you want, Eddie? What are your deepest desires?”

And they thought he was the freak?

“Dude.” Eddie threw him a look. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I know one of them.”

“Oh, and what would that be?” He couldn’t resist taking the bait.

trouble’s always gonna find you, baby (but so am i) Author: tumblr strangersatellites / twitter strngrsatellite / Artist: tumblr becomingfoxes / twitter becomingfoxes / Artist: tumblr amethyst-crowns / twitter amethystcrowns Steve Harrington has spent the better part of the last five years knocking out hit after hit for the Assassin’s Guild and becoming one of the most lethal agents in the business. After a series of unprecedented, wildly successful cases across the country, his boss pulls him off the active case roster for eight months. He’s been keeping tabs on the Chicago Syndicate for years and has finally deemed Steve ready to take out their leader, The Sandman.

The only problem is that undercover agents have been able to turn up little to no information regarding The Sandman’s identity. The only information the Guild has been able to dredge up is the name of one of their business fronts: a sophisticated private nightclub called Hellfire, and the name of its director, Syndicate member Eddie Munson.

or: Eddie is a low ranking member of the mafia and Steve is the assassin hired to kill his boss.

(i fear) for what tomorrow brings Author: eiqhties (tumblr / AO3) / Artist: sullymygoodname (tumblr / AO3) Since Starcourt, Steve and Eddie have been meeting (and falling in love) secretly. Until - frustrated by Steve’s secrecy - Eddie ended things between them. Steve doesn’t cope well. He’s been having nightmares, nosebleeds, and painful headaches. 

Everything is made much worse after Chrissy Cunningham dies in Eddie’s trailer. Steve is forced to watch as Eddie becomes involved in everything Steve tried so hard to protect him from. 

Or: Steve Harrington’s No Good, Very Bad, Awful Month. 

nobody rules these streets at night like me Author: maxinemaxmayfield [tumblr / ao3] / Artist: maikaartwork [tumblr / twitter] Eddie Munson has never stayed in one place for long. 

When his mom disappears for the last time and his dad goes to jail, he has no other family to turn to. He spends his teenage years moving through the foster system, making friends and then losing them just as quickly. In the end, there’s never any reason to stay. 

After he runs away from his fifth foster home, he finds his way to Hawkins, Indiana and for the first time, finds a reason to stay.

At the Start of the End of the World Author: InsaneJuliann /marvelingjules / Artist: mc-i-r Eddie survived the Demobats (if only barely), Max is in a coma, and the Upside Down is seeping slowly into Hawkins. Steve’s doing what he can, looking out for the people he cares about - but who takes care of him? Eddie, who’s cleared of murder charges but only technically, figures he’s got the time and the interest in taking that job on. And maybe, there’s more to the friendship growing between them than just Platonic feelings. But as the Upside Down grows stronger in Hawkins, becoming harder to ignore, and old enemies and allies make themselves known, Steve and Eddie’s growing feelings for each other may have to wait - indefinitely.

An Act of Grace Author: missberrycake / @daysarestranger​ / Artist: @bienmoreau​ / Podficcer: singinginmay / @daysarestranger​ On the morning after Broughton Hall’s annual summer fête, the body of a local Baron’s son was found on the grounds of the estate, as lifeless and cold as the morning was warm. Having spent the summer together, member of the household staff Edward Munson was the first to be suspected. As for the Baron’s son, perhaps there was more to him than the Baron would have society believe.

Decades later, Max Mayfield comes across the murder of Steven Harrington while researching topics for the second season of her hit true crime podcast. Along with her some-time engineer and full-time ex-boyfriend, Lucas, Max uncovers a story of two people that, entwined in secrecy and truths left unspoken, reaches out across history.

Two Truths and a Lie About Steve Harrington Author: endzela [ao3] / Artist: singinginmay [ao3] Steve is desperate to find a date for his high school reunion, and his best friend Eddie volunteers to pretend to be his boyfriend. What Eddie doesn’t know, however, is that Steve has had a crush on him ever since they became friends in college, and although Steve is not planning on letting him find out about it now, spending a week together in the same room might make things difficult. Especially since Eddie keeps flirting with him at every chance he gets.

As the poets say Author: ChristinMKay / @transmascsteveharrington / Artist: @quokkafoxtrot / Artist: riddletalks Eddie loathes the idea of soulmates. The words his soulmate will say the moment they realize they are in love with him sit heavy on his wrist. Heavy like a burden, like a cursed prophet, harbinger of death. Others cry tears of joy when they get their words, Eddie had cried tears of anxiety. The dark letters on his wrist read, “Dustin died.” On the other side of town and yet worlds apart from Eddie, Steve loathes the words on his wrist just as much. Not because he doesn’t want a soulmate. No, he longs for them every day. And every day is a painful reminder that he hasn’t found them yet when someone randomly calls out his words. The letters on his wrist simply say, “Hey Steve.”

tin roof rusted Author: @bdelaney_ao3 [twitter] [ao3] / Artist: @themeanderingty /. Artist: @cemeterylight / @cemeterylights Steve had always been someone who thinks of sex as something that was shared between people, never something that could be just for himself. After coming to terms with his sexuality, Steve finally finds the nerve to visit the adult store where Nancy works only to find something so much better than a toy along the way: the owner and resident king of nerds, Eddie Munson.

22 upcoming projects to be posted next week (Nov 5 - Nov 11).

*To keep up with all the Steddie Bigbang 2023 posting, be sure to follow us @steddiebang or track tags #steddiebang23 masterposts, #steddiebang23 project promo, or #steddiebang23 upcoming projects.

[illarian-rambling]

*in the most elegant, immaculate handwriting imaginable*

Dear Elsind,

I saw your column, and am in fact rather in need of advice. I’ve tried asking my good friend Amelia, but she just laughs uproariously every time I do, so I’ve given up on getting a straight answer from her.

I recently got a new coworker at my workplace, and he’s… very attractive, to say the least. His name is Merry, and he’s absolutely lovely. We’ve become fast friends, and I’ll admit I’m developing a bit of a crush on him. Luckily, the place I work is very unbothered by workplace relationships, but I have a lot of other problems.

First of all, I believe I may have mentioned I’m married in front of him. While my husbands wouldn’t mind me seeing him as well, I know a lot of pirates (oh, yes, context: I am a pirate) are very disapproving of polyamory and I don’t know how he’d react. I’m also asexual, and I’m not sure how he’d react to that either, since my people (I’m a siren) are generally stereotyped as seductive and expected to behave in a very certain way.

That being said, I keep feeling like he’s flirting with me. By pirate standards, he’s absolutely not. But he’s consistently started dressing more colourfully and elegantly and going out of his way to ask me what I think of his outfit. He’s also given me a few small trinkets he found at the market. Both of these are significant signifiers of flirting in my culture, and even though I know he couldn’t possibly know my cultural signifiers of flirting, I can’t help but feel like it means something.

Any advice you have would be welcome. If he is flirting with me, I’d love to see where it goes - he’s really a wonderful man (and I’ll admit I might have been dressing up for him a bit too). But if he isn’t interested, I’d hate to make him uncomfortable having to work on the same ship as me every day, especially since I outrank him (I’d never pressure him into anything, and Amelia would kill me if I did, but I can’t be sure he knows that). I’m not certain how best to proceed.

Much thanks,

Malcolm Lee

*In passibly legible cursive, hearts dotting all the I's*

Thanks so much for writing in, Malcolm!

This is a delicate situation you've found yourself in, but also, I think, a great opportunity. You're right - even in such a relaxed environment, coworker relationships can be tough. It gets messy when rank factors in, and if you ever break up, then you're just stuck seeing them everyday anyways.

But things are looking up for you! It would be quite the coincidence if Merry out of nowhere started engaging in siren flirting behaviors (I'm assuming your word for siren is different from mine, as the siren flirting I'm familiar with involves quite a few more human sacrifices). However, if I was a strapping pirate trying to show interest in my siren shipmate, I would read up on how sirens flirt and try to get him to take the hint. It's a really caring thing to do and a total green flag, in my opinion. Of course, yes, it could be a coincidence, but that's the boring answer!

As for the polyamory and asexuality, that's a conversation you're going to have to have up front with him. Make sure, if he is interested in seeing you, that he understands the possible risks involved. Also, definitely introduce him to your husbands. I don't know your exact situation, but all the polycules I've seen work best when every member is on friendly terms with the others. Asexuality is also something to talk about right off the bat. Make sure he's aware of your boundaries, especially when he might assume otherwise due to racial stereotypes. I can relate to you there - changelings are frequently assumed to be promiscuous due to a tendency to wear attractive faces as a social shield and a history of sexual exploitation. In my relationships, though I'm not asexual, I do have some strict boundaries when it comes to intimacy, and I find it best to be clear about these from the get-go. It's a good way to establish trust early on and also to use as a litmus test for your partner's respect for you. If your Merry is truly a worthwhile lover, he'll understand.

Ultimately, I think you should go for it! To me, it seems like he's trying to be subtle, but he's definitely interested in you. Maybe ask him out for a late-night picnic on the deck (I don't know anything about ships) and spill your heart there. I wish you luck, whatever you decide to do!

Ever your friend,

Elsind Cavernsight

(From this ask game)

[veryace-ficrecs]

Steve Harrington Is a Good Babysitter

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)   

Blood will follow blood by Rocketbride - Rated T

Steve smiled. “Here’s the bad news: you’re gonna need stitches, Mayfield. A bandage isn’t going to keep enough blood inside of you. And you might get an infection if you leave it gaping open like that.”

“No. No!” Max thrashed and El hugged her.

“What’s the problem, Mad Max?” Eddie said from behind Lucas. “Hate the hospital? It ain’t so bad. I had some delicious jello when I was recovering from the bat attack.” He sauntered into her line of sight and flapped his arms dramatically.

“No, it’s…we can’t afford it, alright?” Max tried to sit up and El scooched in to support her. “I had to get stitches two months ago and they cost $200. My mom didn’t eat lunch for a week after that.” Her eyes rolled up at Steve. “Please, Steve, can’t you just, like, tape it up? I can go easy on it. Lucas can help me get around.” Everyone looked at Lucas, who nodded nervously.

“Steve, just put some more gauze on it, I’ll be fine,” Max gritted out as she tried to get to her feet.

“Woah, woah, stay down,” Steve held his arms to block her. He chewed his lips harder. “I guess I could. Yeah. It could work.”

The dangers of babysitting by Siegrrun - Rated T

The wound in his side screamed against the too deep breath and it took everything he had in him not to make a sound. There was no need to alarm the kids.

Or

Steve hides his injury from the kids. It goes about as well as you'd think

 i wave goodbye to the end of beginning (goodbye) by steveharringtoned - Not Rated

Eddie Munson has been going steady with Steve Harrington for a little while now. He’s learned to expect the occasional disturbance.

In which he observes:

5 times Steve helps the kids, +1 time they help him.

 you're beautiful (every little piece, love) by strawberryspence - Rated T

Steve Harrington would do anything for the kids. Anything.

Apparently that includes shaving his hair.

The Curse of Hawkins Becomes Known by AshWinterGray - Rated T

Lucas won the game, Steve pulls off a miracle, the guys are sorry, and... Chrissy Cunningham is apparently possessed. This is not how anyone thought the night would go. Least of all the government. 

You can put it all on me, you can laugh and you can bleed by steveharringtoned - Rated G

Phil Callahan has made a large variety of strange arrests in his time working as a cop for Hawkins, Indiana. Daylight skinny-dippers; a small group of old ladies who’d attempted to rob the corner shop with their umbrellas, a guy who’d stolen a total of eighteen gnomes from his suburban neighborhood.

But pulling over Max Mayfield driving her brother’s Camaro at the ripe age of thirteen was pretty insane. Sure, kids will be kids and kids will be crazy. Until Steve Harrington crawled out of the backseat, clutched his knees and horror-movie hurled blood all over his boots and shit got crazier.

That took it from a minor concern to oh, fuck. Callahan has to take this kid to a hospital.

Kiss, Marry, Kill by QueermoDelToro - Rated G

The kids play Kiss, Marry, Kill. Dustin instigates. Mike overreacts. Hilarity ensues. 

Pride of the Party by scifigeek14 - Rated T

The party owes Steve a lot, and he owes them just as much.

A five plus one fic - about friendship, growing up, and gratitude.

it feels so scary, getting old by generic_cruiser - Rated T

Five times Robin sees Steve being a mom to the party, and one time she fills in for him 

five times steve hated being the babysitter and the one time he was grateful by simplyylupin - Rated T

Selfishly, a part of him wished he’d ignored Dustin earlier that day and just gone home, oblivious to the situation around him. Alas, he was there, and there was no way in hell he was letting these prepubescent dipshits blindly follow a bunch of flesh eating monsters.

or

Five times Steve Harrington (thought he) hated being the babysitter and the one time he was grateful. 

Sleep tight, don't let the Demodogs bite by PursueCrazyLife - Rated G

After the tunnels a fairly stressed-out and concussed Steve has to ensure the safety of the kids.

And there is still the matter of the demodog in the fridge.

(aka. the obligatory season 2 aftermath fanfic. After experiencing season 2 nostalgia I couldn't help myself adding yet another one to the pile)

The Favor by AshWinterGray - Rated T

Hopper showing up at his door is alarming for several reasons. For most, it would be because he was the Chief of Police. But for Steve, it meant there was a potential threat. And now was not the time for him to be cooking dinner. 

Common Cents by Ghoststar - Rated T

Making a will at eighteen seems incredibly morbid. The lawyer stares at him long and hard the entire time. She acts like he's contagious, like she might catch her death from him or maybe he'll ruin her rug by dropping dead in her office. Steve figures she has nothing to worry about. If anything's going to kill him, it's probably going to be a monster from the Upside Down.

-

In which Steve hunts monsters, becomes a deputy, makes a will, and finds a family. Among other things.

designated driver by genesisofrhythm - Rated T

 Steve screamed as Robin slammed on the brakes.

 “That is not how you stop!” he said, as his whole body jerked forward. His head would’ve hit the dashboard if he wasn’t holding the handle at the top of the car with a death grip.

 Robin turned to look at him. She had the audacity to be offended. “There was a stop sign.”

 “Eyes on the road,” Steve snapped.

Or: 5 times Steve taught someone how to drive + 1 time he was in the driver’s seat.

Outside Looking In (Request) by miss_little_kitten - Rated G

Eddie seeing the kids and Robin interacting with Steve, including a day he's waiting for their arrival and they never came.

Steve and Robin would 100% look everywhere for those kids if they couldn't find them.

The Times Steve Didn't Know How To Say I Love You and the Time He Did by miss_little_kitten - Rated G

Times Steve didn't know to say I love you too back to the kids, either in their own love language or the words in general and then the time he said he loved them to Hell and back, which was obvious.

[mollywog]

Far From The Madding Crowd - Chapter 20

Revisiting this chapter because it’s my favorite so far in the reread

In every point of view, ranging from politic to passionate, it was desirable that she, a lonely girl, should marry, and marry this earnest, well-to-do, and respected man.

When you think about it, she probably should feel more alone: she’s in an unfamiliar place, with no family present, taking on a job she didn’t expect, she fired her Bailiff… Gabriel is the only person she knows and trusts. He’s a steady, reassuring presence in her life

~~~~~~~~

This feels significant-

Oak stood somewhat as Eros is represented when in the act of sharpening his arrows: his figure slightly bent, the weight of his body thrown over on the shears, and his head balanced side-ways, with a critical compression of the lips and contraction of the eyelids to crown the attitude.

Eros - Greek God of Love and Sex 👀 - she’s also about to talk to him about her love life so there’s that too.

~~~~~~~~~

This description is so vivid, I can feel it:

The peculiar motion involved in turning a wheel has a wonderful tendency to benumb the mind. It is a sort of attenuated variety of Ixion's punishment, and contributes a dismal chapter to the history of gaols. The brain gets muddled, the head grows heavy, and the body's centre of gravity seems to settle by degrees in a leaden lump somewhere between the eyebrows and the crown. Bathsheba felt the unpleasant symptoms after two or three dozen turns.

~~~~~~~~~~

Then there this:

He relinquished the winch, and inclosing her two hands completely in his own (taking each as we sometimes slap a child's hand in teaching him to write), grasped the shears with her. "Incline the edge so," he said.

Hands and shears were inclined to suit the words, and held thus for a peculiarly long time by the instructor as he spoke.

"That will do," exclaimed Bathsheba. "Loose my hands. I won't have them held! Turn the winch."

In another context, this would be a pretty sexy moment, and maybe it was for Gabriel who held on for a peculiarly long time, but that Hardy says ‘taking each as we sometimes slap a child's hand in teaching him to write’ which kills the vibe for me… with that being said - it sets the scene for the rest of their encounter - Gabriel (compared to the God of love and desire) reprimanding/advising her on her actions towards Boldwood and Bathsheba, frustrated and batting him away.

~~~~~~~~~

As I was listening - this popped out at me:

A woman may be treated with a bitterness which is sweet to her, and with a rudeness which is not offensive. Bathsheba would have submitted to an indignant chastisement for her levity had Gabriel protested that he was loving her at the same time; the impetuosity of passion unrequited is bearable, even if it stings and anathematizes—there is a triumph in the humiliation, and a tenderness in the strife. This was what she had been expecting, and what she had not got. To be lectured because the lecturer saw her in the cold morning light of open-shuttered disillusion was exasperating. He had not finished, either. He continued in a more agitated voice:—

Which reminded me of

It takes a long time before I get to the bottom of why I'm so upset. When I do, it's almost too mortifying to admit. All those months of taking it for granted that Peeta thought I was wonderful are over. Finally, he can see me for who I really am.

IDK, what do you think? Does the whole argument have a similar flavor to Hijacked Peeta’s first conversation with Katniss?

[cwcthzl]

i am assigned you homework to watch when harry met sally

deb

okay so when i saw this i decided i was gonna watch it and keep a record of all of my thoughts during the film and share it with you, so here you go (it's a lot, i warn you)

i can't believe i have harry's exact haircut oh my fucking god

GET THIS MAN'S BAKERY OUT OF MY FACE

why does he casually have grapes w him

god how i envied those cheerful ppl who dotted their 'i's with little hearts

"look, when the shit comes down, i'm gonna be prepared and you're not. that's all i'm saying." / "in the meantime you're gonna ruin your whole life waiting for it."

sally's hair flow is actually gorgeous no wonder why she puts that much hairspray on

their fits are so 🤩🤩

i like how everytime sally declines to say more when harry asks, harry goes with 'fine, don't tell me' and moves on with whatever is in front of him instead of giving sally the reaction she very much expects (aka pleading for more info) and sally just gives in because she WANTS to share even tho she says she doesn't/can't

TF IS THAT ORDER. WHEN DID ORDERING PIE BECOME THIS COMPLICATED

sheldon the wonder schlong😭😭💀

"but if you MUST know" gurl just spit it out

"they don't make sunday." / "why not?" / because of god." IM WHEEZING

he is so sassy with the 'so?'s oh my god

he is so me

i like the song choice here because i think it really reflects sally and harry's interaction perfectly. "you say ee-ther, i say either." / "you like potato, and i like pot-ahto."

why does he have a baseball bat

why do blonde men look bald

"i never considered not sleeping with you a sacrifice" SALLY YOU COOKED HIM GIRL

"it's amazing. you look like a normal person but actually you are the angel of death."

i LOVE harry's mindset he is so me i'm gonna kill myself this guy is an ass

HOW MANY TIMES DID THIS MF MARRY

i was waiting for harry to get divorced tbh he had that divorced dad kinda vibe to him im glad he aced his journey ❤️

standing up to join the wave after telling your friend your wife told you she doesn't know if she's ever loved you is INSANE

"oh really? well that symptom is fucking my wife." funniest line delivery in history

marie i love you bby we're gonna get through this together even tho you're dumb asf

why is this bitch pulling a joe goldberg rn

it's the way sally is taller than harry for me

this couple pissed me off so much GOD STOP TALKING OVER EACH OTHER FOR A FUCKING SEC

YESSSS DIVORCED BITCH APARTMENT THAT HAS NO SURROUNDINGS OTHER THAN A COUCH YESSSS

is harry reading stephen king or are my eyes deceiving me

it's that ugly ass back cover that got my attention. i thrifted doctor sleep and only realized stephen king was on the back cover when mom pointed it out by saying that guy probably looked at his own face for horrors. not cool mum

"i miss the idea of him."

THEY ARE SO ON THE OTHER SIDES OF THE COIN I CANT

he is so weird why does he remember all the things she ordered with such hyperspecific steps. why is he like that. why is he me

"big jerk." / "little creep." LMAOOOOOOOOOO

UGH WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS. DANCINGCHEEK TO CHEEK??????? OH MY GODDDDDD

SUCH A SWEET NEW YEARS KISS 😭😭😭

marie i'm gonna kick your ass

MARIE AND JESS??????? THEY ARE SO CUTE

their fight 😭😭😭 their hug😭😭😭😭 i hate this bitches😭😭😭

NOW THEY HAVE BEEF WITH EACH OTEHR'S PARTNERS????? LMAO

"he is a good guy, you should talk to him!" / "he is too tall to talk to." what if i did a flip

he is still reading the end of the books first

he is so soft and gentle with her i'm gonna cry. not a single jab, a single sarcastic comment. just attentively listening and comforting - reassuring her and petting her hair as sally ugly cries . oh my god they are so 😭😭

sally is so pretty even when she cries tf

laughing to crying pipeline is so real sally i get you bby

i love their little kissies it's so insanely pure to me. like a kiss you would get when you are in elementary when you thought this was the ultimate form of love. so innocent and for what

okay well now this is not very just a peck

okay this is escalating

OKAY THIS QUICKLY ESCALATED

why is harry looking at the ceiling like its the ceiling's fault like damn 😭😭

i love sally's curls so much

why every way they approach this it gets even weirder like i am thinking if they fuck all of this would be resolved and they did and it sucked and now i am thinking they should just go back to being friends and they are doing it but it never seems fucking right???????

what are those skinny ass leggings are they fruitcakes

THE SLAP

HE SINGS TO HER OVER THE FUCKING PHONE FOR HER TO PICK UP😭😭😭🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

this tall bitch again

no this is another bitch

bro he is so me what the fuck i'm gonna kill myself

FRANK SINATRA???? WDYM IT HAD TO BE YOU?????

"how about you love me too?"

THE DETAILS????? IM DEYING

"i came here because when you realize you wanna spend the rest of your life with somebody you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

"you say things like that and you make it impossible for me to hate you!" 10 things i hate about you reference? perchance?

SMILING INTO THE KISSSSSSS IM DECEASING

yeah def have chocolate sauce on the side

but after all, i really enjoyed this film. like, throughly. i would be fine even if they didn't end up together because their friendship was just that good and reminded me of me and a friend of mine, and it really touched some subjects i really liked. also i added another mf to my kinlist, so thanks????? ig????? they are very cute and i Loved this film debs you are a saint

[localplaguenurse]

Idk why but I’m suddenly remember the part where wifey thought Morax died. Anyways I’m cursing the fact that the gods saw it fit that I think in pictures because my god. The desperation, the way Wifey would hesitate for a split second to fully process that their supposed dead husband is right there standing. Wifey would basically crash into his arms and hold him tight, fisting their arms into his clothes as their put their ear on chest and as the steady beat of his heart reassured them that he’s here and not dead. Then, the dam breaks and a horrible sound erupted from Wifey as they cling to him desperately as if he would disappear if they’re were to let go and as sobs wracked through Wifey, Morax swears he will never be the cause of their despair again.

Tldr: why is it that your fics like to wack me over the head with a baseball bat when I least expect it. I wrote all this with tears in my eyes and I’m getting the post crying headache

Oh that’s so sweet and not actually how I saw that scene :3 in a good way? Bad way? I like yours but I’m gonna make everyone’s day worse!

Something that only kind of came up a couple of times and I wish I expanded on a little more is sometimes wifey’s anxiety can present itself as anger. This is because I based it off of my anxiety, at least at the time because I was dealing with some shit. A lot of built up frustration and stress. You only really see it when they yell at Wei Jin for packing their things and when Morax crash landed and they snapped at Xiao and Li Lei. I wish it came up a little more for both character building and because like, hey, this is how anxiety works sometimes.

So picture this. You’re wifey. You hear your husband is dead, which causes you to have the worst panic attack of your life, to the point you pass out, and all you can think about is how the rest of your family will react and how one of the few people from your past is now gone. You’re not even thinking about how him dying means that you might die as well.

You go home, and on the journey there you’re wondering how long until your children hear, how long you have left before you’re gone, and how you’re going to cope with being in your home without you husband there.

And then he’s standing there, making tea, like the horrific news of his passing is not spreading through Liyue like wildfire. He looks up at you, and he sees you’re an absolute mess (how could you not be?). He calls your name out, softly.

You realize it’s really him. It’s Morax, your husband, alive and well.

And you start to scream at him.

It’s the first time you have ever truly raised your voice at him. You’ve had disagreements and squabbles in the past - even happily married, no one can go 2000 years without a little conflict - but this is completely different. You’ve never been this furious with anyone, much less your own husband. You don’t even know what is making you angrier. Is it because he scared you into thinking he was dead? Is it because he didn’t tell you? Is it because of how you found out? Is it because you don’t know if your children and grandchildren know what’s happening? It doesn’t matter because it all bubbles to the surface and you cannot stop yourself from asking him what the fuck were you thinking?!

And then you’re out of steam. Tears are running down your face but you don’t know when or why you started crying. Your throat and head hurt from the screaming, and your whole body just feels awful. Morax stares at you, speechless, horrified. You don’t know if he’s horrified by your reaction, or because he’s the reason you’re like this.

You sink to your knees and just... sob. It’s all you have the energy to do. You feel like shit because of your panic attack earlier, and you feel like shit for yelling.

Morax at some point snaps out of his stupor to step forward. He sits down next to you, and it kills him when you initially flinch away from him. He’s murmuring, telling you that he’s sorry, he didn’t mean to scare you, it’s a complicated situation, and you have every right to be as mad at him as you are, but please, my darling, deep breaths.

He holds you close for the rest of the evening, and the house is dead quiet. You cling to him in your sleep, and he stays up all night running his fingers through your hair. He’ll never forgive himself, and there’s a part of him that hopes you don’t forgive him either. He had already brought you to anguished tears when you two had first gotten married, and he made a promise, a contract, to never let anything hurt you and to give you a happy life.

He feels like he failed you. 2000 years of married bliss, nullified in an instant. It doesn’t matter to him if you forgive him. He’ll still hear your grief clear as day for however long he has left.

[ravnloft]

hellooooooooooooo i realized i have never done like a full list of my ocs. so here it is

amma theylin: dark elf rogue, chaotic neutral (leans evil), dual-wielding swords and ranged bow, proficient in being sneaky and being hot. tragic backstory is she became infatuated with a guy who was trying really hard to be lawful good and when he dropped the ball on their coup d'état plot she killed him and ran. will do literally anything if it pays well enough. played her in dnd, bg3 and elder scrolls.

lady gwendolyn viridience morrigan, druidess, esq.: half-elf druid, usually chaotic good, majored in botany, minored in ethically questionable usage of charm spells. tends a greenhouse that holds a portal to the feywild, the stewardship of which she was bequeathed by a very powerful archwizard and mentor and good friend, on his deathbed. she never wanted it but the choice was between her and her evil sister/s so the archwizard gave it gwen. now she uses it to (1) be the best damn florist in neverwinter (2) howl's moving castle her way away from bad fantasy tinder dates because she's a hopeless romantic and terrified of commitment. played her in dnd and bg3.

samson o'dare: human/aasimar paladin, true good, big sword and bigger shield, great with animals, has wings like a mourning dove. he worshiped chauntea as a child and then one day lathander appeared to him in the middle of a field and told him it was his holy holy duty to be a paladin of light. samson was like hell yeah i want a sword. and began adventuring. adventuring quickly proved to be far more unpleasant than he had expected and he prays to chauntea every day like "mom i'm scared come pick me up". played him in dnd and bg3.

nol barrow-bound: undead death cleric, ??? (she is extremely impressionable), sickle and staff/half-caster, uses a human skull as an arcane focus and has 1 million holy symbols on her person. used to be a hag's apprentice and then she woke up on the side of the road one day and was just like, "guess i'm an entrepreneur now". gifted alchemist, even more gifted necromancer, makes her living as an herbalist and medium, lowkey cheats on the medium part because she just tells people what they want to hear (or at least what she thinks they want to hear) but she doesn't see it as cheating because she IS contacting the dead she just isn't letting them be RUDE. collects roadkill. also kind of looks like roadkill. one time i thought "haha what if nol and samson were in an adventuring party together" and now they're tragedy-to-romance endgame lovers. played her in dnd and skyrim. she's usually my go-to for dnd oneshots :')

sigg solveig/sigourney gevaudan: human (? she's huge, there's no way she's fully human)/werewolf barbarian, will change her entire ethos if a hot girl says so, sword/axe/hammer so big it is physically impossible for people other than her to wield. tragic backstory is she contracted lycanthropy at a young age and wound up killing her familar. she went into hiding and became a fighter, a laborer, a soldier, whatever put food on her table, but eventually her lycanthropic bloodlust got hard to control and she became a hermit rather than risk killing her loved ones again. she is not smart or wise or especially clever but why would she need to be when she can crush someone's head with one hand. womanizer but her deepest wish is to get married and be a stay-at-home mom baking for her wife every day. played her in pathfinder and skyrim.

princess daisychain frances van pancypants iii: goblin, class variable but generally support/healing, true good. looks like an albino bat. raised by halflings. the sweetest, nicest, tiniest magical girl you will ever meet. completely filled with love. knows one (1) swear word. played her in dnd.

arkhemites "miette" du bäl: tiefling warlock, something evil but might go on a hero's journey idk, worships whatever tentacled space monster is native to the setting. wants to plunge the world into entropy so it can be born anew. she's noble or royal but has like 16 sisters and most of them are older. played her in starfinder.

[thegeminisage]

i don't know how i'm supposed to simply do a tng update when there was SPOCK but obviously last night (tonight as i type this, but it's late, so this post is going up while i'm at work) we watched unification part i & part ii

tng update:

🌈SPOCK🌈

okay, i'm normal again

part i: BITTERLY disappointed that all we got out of this episode spockwise was one blurry photo and him coming in right at the end. i had a feeling they'd do that. i guess now i have to talk about the nonimportant nonspock parts of this episode 🥱

ive decided i hate sarek's new wife. what business is it of hers if spock objects to sarek in public? if sarek didn't have a problem with it why make one? evil stepmother fr. why did sarek marry another human anyway does he have a fucking fetish or something...at least she was too old to get knocked up. i was reading about ages on the wiki today and amanda was only TWENTY YEARS OLD when she had spock. sarek would have been 65. i know vulcans age way different so it's not as creepy but STILL. girl, wait until you are old enough to drink

speaking of sarek...i went back and forth feeling terrible for him and wanting to attack him with my bare hands. under one hand he is on his deathbed and obviously very ill and miserable and suffering deep regrets over past mistakes and it's hard not to have sympathy...on the other, maybe if you wanted less deathbed regrets about your relationship with spock YOU SHOULD HAVE TREATED HIM BETTER! bitch.

also, whatever he and picard had going on was homoerotic. "we're part of each other" why do they talk about the mind meld that way in tng and not in tos. why did picard feel up sarek's hand on his deathbed the second his wife looked away. hes got a history of homewrecking since he (i know) had his affair baby wesley with beverly. so Whats Going On

picard forcefully obtaining the klingon ship. i LOVE when he gets to be a bitch

ROMULAN RACEFAKING??? a proud star trek tradition at this point i guess but it was truly awful to behold. DEEPLY disappointed sela did not later lick the paint off his ears as the klingons implied she would. smh

i like also how riker blew up that whole ship and nobody batted an eyelash. he really can just do whatever

part ii: SPOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the first time i cried was when spock himself came onscreen at the end of part i. then just as soon as i collected myself he mentioned jim kirk twice in the space of 30 seconds and i lost it again. we are literally bridging the gap between tos spock and spock prime from aos rn and i Dont like it.

Very Sad his dad kicked it before they could reconcile. but i saw his microexpressions when picard delivered the news. i missed them more than you can possibly imagine

i did love though that he started viewing picard as like a proxy sarek. imagine having daddy issues with a guy who is 75 years younger than you. lowkey they also had a little homoeroticism happening. "cowboy diplomacy" sure whatever

riker and the four-armed pianist 10/10 i hope they fucked. i'm so glad we wont he riker roulette and it wasn't creepy. also only riker could successfully flirt with a women after killing her husband in a spaceship battle <3

i'm a little iffy on spock's uhhh whole deal in this episode. he's lik yeah i chose the vulcan way of life these romulans are gonna have way better lives after their vulcan enlightenment but meanwhile he's criticizing sarek for his obsession with logic to the exclusion of all emotion (which is what he decided in tmp, that you need both) and also the vulcan way of life has done huge damage to his relationship with his father as well. so which is it?? idk, maybe he's not doing well because of sarek dying and all but he seemed like he was in a very "im not willing to acknowledge that i have emotions because rn theyre causing me pain" sort of mood. buddy :(

then again, it IS a tng script. we can only expect so much. it wasn't so inconsistent that it took me out of the episode but it did bother me a little because i just don't understand why he's willing to devote the rest of his life to this cause...he seemed to imply he had emotional reasons but what were they?? we will quite literally never know.

what's wack to me also is that in nineteen years romulus is gonna be GONE. like it's just going to be gone. eaten up by the sun or whatever. if someone had a baby right now on romulus that baby would not be old enough to drink before the sun swallowed them. so everything spock is doing is for nothing.

sela in this episode was really funny. "i hate vulcans." so true queen. i mean i don't care about her at all but that was hilarious

data doing the vulcan nerve pinch!!!!!!! that was so fun. i don't think it requires telepathy to do, just super strength, but i guess if you do then that makes no sense. it made me happy though.

the end when spock melded with picard to quasi-meld with his father and almost wept was me crying for the third time...i couldn't stand seeing him cry!!!!!! i can't believe sarek really just died without ever reconciling with him but i kind of like it better this way bc what sarek did was his own fault not spock's. so spock got closure and sarek. didn't. rip dude

okay. this concludes. the SPOCK UPDATE. tonight: a matter of time. and TOMORROW........the undiscovered country. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA