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hidtired · 7 months ago

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Unfortunate Timing [Part 1]

(Daryl Dixon x Reader) Masterlist

Description: You found out your pregnant early into your relationship with Daryl Dixon. To make matters worse? The apocalypse happens a few days later! (not fully canon)

5.7k words

Warnings (Pregnancy, gore, smut, reference to abuse, violence, fluff, walking dead stuff, ect.)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 etc.

Pre Apocalypse

You had moved to a small town in Georgia to get away from your parents. Your Aunt Mary had a little boutique and offered a job. Your parents didn’t like you weren’t married yet, not even dating either. So they have been shoving men at you for the last few years. They thought by your age you should have been married with kids. They wanted grandkids. Your brother was married but him and his wife struggled with fertility. The final straw was trying to get you into an arranged marriage with one of your father’s business buddies kid. You had only just turned 30.

It had freaked you out how your parents made it seem like you didn’t have a choice. So you packed your bags, your mother pleaded for you to not go. You broke the lease to your apartment and left without telling them where.

You like the simple life you were leading now. Helping your Aunt's business. You lived with her because she was a widow with no kids and wanted the company. You had some interesting neighbors across the street. You had just driven into the driveway taking notice of a man fixing his truck. It was hot outside and his arms were covered in grease.

You walked into the kitchen where your Aunt was doing dishes. You decided to help making idle talk about how the shop was until you looked out the window to still see the sleeveless man. Your Aunt caught you looking, "Thought you came here to get away from boys?" You smile shyly at being caught, looking back down and handing her a wet plate to be dried. "Never said that... Just the one my parents choose. Didn't have time to look for a date when men were thrown at me randomly by them." Your Aunt was amused to say the least. "That's Daryl Dixon, him and his brother live there. You have to watch yourself with a Dixon. But Daryl has helped me with a few things that broke around the house. He replaced the battery's in the fire alarms for me a week before you came."

You gave her a sideways look, "You trying to set me up now to?" Mary laughs, "Fine fine, granted I do bake something for him every time he does something for me. Could just have a sweet tooth." You look back out the window, ‘Daryl huh?’

It was a week later that you got a call from your brother. You went on a walk to take the call. He was anger that your father was on him for a kid because you had disappeared. The pressure had turned to his wife who was already having a hard time with infertility. It was when you were walking back to the house did the conversation get heated.

"Grow a back bone and yell at them Mathew! Why are you coming at me for!?" He responded with his own venom, "Why couldn't you just do what they asked! But go ahead die alone for all I care!" He ended the call abruptly after. You clenched your teeth tight and closed your eyes trying to compose yourself. A voice called from across the street, "Ya doin alright over there?" You turned to see Daryl beer in hand with the hood of his car open. You sighed shoulders sagging, "Sorry for the yelling." Daryl pick up another beer showing it off to you, "Sounds like ya could use one of these." You put your hands to your hips before deciding to walk over. You grab the beer he handed you with a smile, "Thanks..."

You cracked the can open taking a sip. Daryl stare at you for a second before saying something, “Yer boyfriend causing you trouble?” You chuckled at the thought, making a small face of disgust at it even, “No, that was just my brother being an ass.” Daryl took mental note of that ‘single’. He huffed and looked back down into his trucks hood. “Oh trust me I know how that is.” You look at him as he refocused his attention to his car, ‘That’s right, that’s what your Aunt had said.’ You lean against the truck. “Your Daryl right? I’m Y/N” Daryl looked back up at the mention of you knowing his name, “Oh so ya heard bout us.” He sounded a bit disappointed at the thought. You lean to look inside the car, smiling over to him, “Only the things my Aunt said.” He perked a brow at that, “Who’s yer Aunt? What she say about us?”

“Mary.” You pointed over your shoulder to the house, “And she mentioned you might have a sweet tooth.” Daryl looked over to the house of the lady he often did things for, her niece chiming in again. “Always see you fixing this truck across the street.” He pulled a red rag from his back pocket wiping his hands, “Ya damn thing always seems to be breakin.” He took notice of the girl fully now. You took slow sips of the beer he gave you while starring into the hood. “Well if I have any trouble with my car I know who to ask.” You looked up to him with a shy smile. “I’m useless when it comes to knowing anything about cars.”

That’s how they both started talking. You watching him fix a couple spark plugs while talking about things. Getting to know each other a little. Like how you were helping Mary with her shop. “Ah, so you just moved here.” You nodded, “Mmm about a month. Have no clue where anything is and have no friends so…” you shrug. A breeze started as evening was setting in. Daryl hesitated before saying, “I could show you some local spots.” He bit the side of his thumb nail waiting for an answer. You had bit your bottom lip looking up at him and smiled, “Sounds like fun to me.”

He was worried for a second he messed up, “There’s a bar that everyone knows, real popular on Fridays.” You nodded while looking at him staring down at your watch seeing you had been talking for about a hour. It was getting late so you slowly started to walk backwards to your house. You smile with a glint in your eye, “Sounds like a Date… see you Friday!” You waved and all he could do was look on with wide eyes. Did you just- “Pick you up at 8!” He yelled. He was in slight disbelief at the out come. Had you been flirting with him the whole time?

You had handed him a tool before he could even ask. You had known how to do it all along and played stupid to talk with him. He smiled down as he closed his hood. ‘Oh you were trouble.’

When Friday came he was kicking himself. This was unlike him to go on dates. But he wouldn’t deny he liked you. You were also looking forward to a date for the first time in a while. Preferring it more than being tricked on to one with some guy your parents liked. Daryl probably didn’t fit that kind a guy they would. Oh but your kind definitely. Your Aunt watched you try on an outfit before deciding to go with a floral casual dress that went to your knees. She gave you a smug look and you only rolled your eyes. You had a long black jacket over you, knowing it was already cool outside.

Daryl knocked on the door and off you went in his truck to this bar. He was slightly nervous when he saw you dolled yourself up, and for him? He had lied to Merle where he was going and doing. He was desperately trying not to blow this, “Ya look pretty…” he had said it at a stop light looking over to you. It’s everything a girl wants to hear, and it sure made you smile.

When they got to the bar the bartender seemed confused to see Daryl with a girl. He was normally there with his brother. Mostly to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid he had noticed. “Well if it isn’t a Dixon, tell your brother he still owes me for the glass he broke.” Daryl cringed at the mention of his brother. You just simply took a seat on a stool. “What can I get you two.”

You had a few drinks you’ll admit. You tried a classic drink that the locals had. You were grossed out at the drink causing you and Daryl to laugh. He only had a drink with the need to drive you both home. You had tried to play pool but decided you were a little to inebriated at how many times you missed the ball entirely. You were standing in a corner of the bustling bar talking. You held a bow empty cup dying laughing at a story had told you about his childhood. Sometimes kids dumb actions, like jumping off a shed in a hero outfit, were just funny. You had lost a little balance at your laughing and place a hand onto Daryl’s chest. He only looked down to you putting a hand to your waist to steady you. You had tears of laughter in you eye, you fanning your face to no ruining your make up. He was definitely enjoying this more than he wanted to.

You had been at the bar for about 4 hours with Daryl. You now walked leaning into him in the parking lot. He had an arm around your shoulder leading you to the car door. He started the car and looked over to you, “Should have told me ya were a lightweight.” You gasped offendly, “Lightweight! I’ll have you know I’m just tipsy.” He looked at you questioningly humming. You relaxed into the car seat, “Ok, I’ll admit I haven’t done this in a while- might be a little rusty on the drinking game.”

You both continued to joke around until getting to the neighborhood. He back up in your drive way to later drive into his own. Him doing that thing with his arm as he back up. You bit your lip at the sight. When he parked and looked at you you spoke, “Thank you for this Daryl, I had fun.” He nodded, “Was my pleasure…” you had slowly moved closer crossing the middle seat. He looked down at your flushed face, mostly done by the alcohol. That liquid courage probably giving you the strength to grab him by the chin and slowly kiss him. He leaned into it grabbing your hip. You pulled back with a bashful smile,

“Same time next week?”

He had fully smiled at that, “Ya bet your sweet ass. Now get out of here miss ‘tipsy’.” You giggle wiggling your way out of the car. Waving goodbye with a stupid smile on your face. He felt his heart skip a beat, ‘oh he was real screwed…’

That night he even thought back to how you were looking at him on the way back. He had caught you leaned against the window with hooded eye. When he looked at you, you tried to fight a smile. Oh and how could he not think of the kiss. His hands dragged down his face at the thought.

This went on for a little over a month. You would see each other throughout the week but Fridays you would go out. Small touch’s and kisses here and there. It wasn’t until you ended up back at that bar that things changed. You were only 2 drinks in. You sat in a booth with Daryl. Head on his shoulder and hands intertwined under the table. You pulled away getting up, “I’m going to get another drink and you a beer. Then I’ll wipe your ass in a game of pool!” Daryl chuckled, “Let’s hope you can hit the ball with your cue this time.” You stuck out your tongue at him while walking to the bar. You had only been waiting for your drinks when a man slide up next to you.

“Whats a pretty thing like you doing with a Dixon? He blackmailing you?” The man held a sleazy smirk. You only look at him with disgust ignoring him. It was when he put his hand to your arm pulling you closer did you talk to him, “Hey back off!” The man’s grip tightened, “What you a hooker or something? Only way a Dixon could get some pipe is by paying for a slut.” You had yanked your arm from him, you falling back a little before landing against someone behind you. A arm rapping around you, you recognized it instantly, Daryl. His voice growling and rumbling against you, “Back off my girl.”

The man who was bothering you only rolled his eyes, “Maybe keep your slut on a leash-“ You had felt Daryl lean forward behind you before you even saw him sock the guy in the face. You had gasped and turned to push Daryl back from the guy. He stumbled and held his nose. You whispered to Daryl, “Ok it’s time to go…” You tried to push him closer to the door but the jackass decided to spit out another comment, “Ya let your bitch drag you away pussy!” You felt Daryl lean forward and resisted you leading him backwards but you spoke softly up to him, “Please…” His eyes briefly met yours. He looked back up to the guy who was probably drunk but, Daryl’s blood was boiling with rage. He relented at your plea and walked out the exit.

He was quiet as he walked back to the truck. Walking a little faster ahead of you. When he got into the drivers seat you had said his name but he wasn’t listening. He put the key in the ignition, turning it on but your hand rested onto his arm and you said his name again, “Daryl…”. He slumped a little and turned the car back off. He slowly turned to look at you. You scooted closer into him. You closed your hands around his face so he would look at you. You gave a small smile, “Thank you.” You gave him a quick peck before leaning back to look at him.

He signed and placed his forehead to yours talking a moment. He thought maybe he was gonna scary you off at the out burst. He whispered, “Hope I didn’t scare ya.” You chuckled shaking your head, “They opposite really. I was scared of that guy and then you came and I felt ok again.” He inhaled a breath before I closing his arms around you. He pulled you into him more and you rapped an arm around his back. You sat there for a moment before you spoke, “Soooo, Your girl huh?”

Daryl froze in place. Didn’t even register he said it in the moment. He pulled back from you, mouth agape, stuttering before he gave up at trying to say anything. You placed a hand into his hair playing with a strand of hair, “I’m your girl?” You had almost whispered it. Daryl cleared his throat, “Will you be?” You let out a breathy sigh,

“Yeah, thought you’d never ask.”

That is when you officially started dating. Sat in the truck, in the parking lot, making out for a good 10 minutes.

You were enjoying the new found established relationship. Over the next week was filled with your Aunt seeing you cuddle on the couch watching a movie. You had even managed to give him a small haircut in his bathroom, “Hmm, I think you would look good with long hair.” Sometime you would find yourself in Daryl’s room laying on his bed just talking when Merle was away.

Speaking of Merle he had later found out when at the bar that his baby brother started a fight over his girlfriend. He had thought nothing of it until he asked his brother if it was true. When it was confirmed he laid hurtful comments at him. ‘No one can love someone like us!’ ‘Like you really?’ It was a definite damage to his ego. But some of the things he said about you rubbed him the wrong way. It made him defensive, ‘She a good lay?’ ‘got you pussy whipped.’ They had yet to even cross that line.

You know understood why Daryl had not wanted you to met his brother at first. He made rude and sexually comments to you. Often either being sexist or racist any time near him. You mostly tried to say clear of him.

Then there came the drama that followed from your parents. Apparently your Aunt let it slip to your brother you were with her. He told your parents and now here you were getting a call from her shop. You picked up the business phone and before you could even spit out your prepared greeting you heard your father’s voice boom over the phone. “Now you listen to me little lady you’re coming back home!” You pause shocked. “Your little tantrum is done and you will do as you’re told!” You could hear your mother in the back telling him to calm down. You to in a breath and replied calmly, “Dad, I will do no such thing.”

He was yelling more. You had caught something about a wedding date and some name before your mother took the phone from him. “Honey, you need to come back home ok?” You really couldn’t understand why, “No Mama I like it here.” She went to go on, “We are just doing what we think is best for you. We just want you to be happy with a husband.” You had enough snapping at them for the first time, “You want what’s best for you. If you wanted me happy you would have listened to me! I’ll have you know with the time I’ve been gone I finally feel free. I even got a boyfriend!”

Your mother gasped, “In the town you’re in! What redneck white trash could you possibly find out there!” You were surprised at the way your mother spoke. But you were also mad at it. You angrily replied, “His name is Daryl Dixon! Fuck you! Never call me again!” You hung up seething. You had closed the shop a little early.

After the call from your parents you walked to the bar. The bartender seemed surprised seeing you without Daryl before asking, “Your usual?” You nodded with an appreciative smile. While waiting for the drink you noticed Daryl’s brother with a few other people. You ignored him deciding you would have the one drink and go home, not really in the mood to deal with Merle.

You had just finished your drink when you heard a commotion behind you. Merle and another were arguing. It was getting really heated. You had stood about ready to leave when the other guy threatened Merle, “I’ll kill you for this!” When you had turned Merle was smug looking and unaware of the knife being pulled from behind the man’s pants. You had yelled, “Merle!” In a panic you lobbed your glass at the man. It shattered over his head sending him to crumple to the side on a table. The knife slipping from his hand and landing in front of him. Merle looked down at the knife before looking up to where the glass came from, spotting you. You were shocked with your mouth open looking at the man holding his head in pain, before looking back to Merle. The few other men that were sitting with them getting up displeased.

Merle realizing he was out numbered started to run toward you. He had grabbed you by the arm and dragged you with him to the exit. The bartender yelled as you got dragged away. “Hey!” You had yelled back before the door closed, “Sorry Lawrence I’ll pay you back later!” Merle was still dragging you along to his motorcycle. The door had swung open and the angry men started to pursue you both. Merle had yelled at you when you pause to look at the door, “Get the fuck on!”

You had hopped over the seat and sat behind him. Not having a moment to hold on before he started to speed off. It wasn’t until he pulled into his driveway that you started telling him off.

Daryl had heard Merle’s motorcycle pull in but he wasn’t expecting to hear you yelling right after it. “Goddamn I’m already having a shit day!” When he walked out the front door to see you telling Merle off as he just sat there on his bike silently taking it. He had never seen his brother not throwing words back at someone. “Are you an idiot!” Not even that got a reaction from him. Daryl knew that would normally get replied by violence. It wasn’t until he spoke did you turn at his voice, “The hell is goin on?” Your anger soon crumpled into tears, you were overwhelmed and maybe a bit scared still body pumping with adrenaline. Daryl almost got whiplash at the sudden mood shift.

That didn’t stop him from hugging you as you started to cry. He shot a look to his brother who still sat on his bike. Merle looking weirded out at the sudden tears. "The hell you do ta her?!” Merle rubbed the back of his neck, "May have got into a bit of a fight at the bar with some folks. She kinda stopped me from being stabbed." He had felt you shaking in his grasp now. He knew you hated conflict, told him about the pit that would form in your stomach. But you stopping Merle from being stabbed? "How she do that?" Merle chuckled, "Threw her glass across the room! Knocked him clean on his sorry ass." He seemed almost impressed by you.

Daryl started leading you back toward your home. Daryl turning to yell back to his brother, "Whatever man piss off." He had gotten you into your house before you spoke, "My Aunt went on her Cabo trip with her book club friends. She'll be gone a week... stay?" He gulped, "If ya really want me to." You nodded, "I don't wanna be alone." He saw you were scared.

He lay next to you in your bed after you calmed down and ate dinner. "Want to talk bout it?" You moved closer to him leading him to put a arm over you. You sighed into him, "I was at the bar because I had a rough conversation with my parents. Somethings were said. Their the reason I moved here, to get away from. I saw Merle and then the knife- then all those men chased us." Your hand rose to pinch the bridge of your nose, "Just been a- a shit day." You move to look up to Daryl's blue eyes a smirk rising to your lips at the worried and tight look he was giving you. He relax a little at your attention. He dragged a hand up your arm to your face, "Merle seems to think your a badass now." He himself was a little proud to hear what you did. You grunted into his chest, "He'd better. Saved his dumbass."

You were talking for a while after that. Seeing the clock blinking 1am now. You were sleepy but enjoyed talking to him to much to fall asleep. Sleep was pulling at your eyes and a question that should have been a inside thought slipped out, "Why haven't we had sex yet?" Daryl was a little taken back but not to shocked at the question, he hummed, "Honestly not a clue, I like you to much to mess anything up." Maybe the tired feeling was making his lips a little loose to. He paused before continued, "I've only had meaningless sex. Nothing with feeling behind it." He smirked down to your hazy eyes, "Why? You tryin to get in my pants?" You chuckled adding a little shrug, "Perhaps. Take me out to dinner and we'll see how the night goes from there." That made Daryl's heart beat a little harder. Of course he has thought about it before just didn't know how to act on it with you. He held you a little tighter to him, goofy smile to his face, "Yes Ma'am."

Take you out to dinner he did. Nothing to fancy but by the end of that night you offered him to follow you inside. You were laughing while bumping backwards into things as you both kissed. You stripping buttons down his shirt when he paused face looking uncomfortable. You stopped at the look. He sighed squeezing his eyes tight. Reminding himself it was you. "Uh sorry, just forgot to mention- just look fer yourself..." You softly pulled the shirt down off of him. Revealing scars along his body.

You dragged a finger along one. You look up at him with round eyes. He looked away before saying, “M’ Daddy was a drunk.” You intake air and release it at the information. You leaned down and kissed the scar you touched. Everything turned slow from that point, more sensual. He rolled into you at a pace he never had before. He was used to chasing a feeling, getting it over with. But every time he would push into you he couldn’t help but love the groans you made. You sure loved the noises subconsciously coming out of him as well. You would move up into him. The slow motion had sent you crazy. Leading you to claw at him begging for more. He didn’t go faster but harder.

Your moans filled your bedroom. Daryl was sucking on your neck while rutting into you. He was huffing out air and grunting in exertion. The tight clench he felt around him damn near knocked the wind out of him. He had pulled out and rested his head on your chest while trying to catch his breath. You dug your hands into the back of his hair.

That night lead to many more like it. Which is what lead you to the current situation going on. You were in the bathroom staring at a positive pregnancy test. Not just one but three. You sat on the floor contemplating, 'How did this happen?' 'Do I keep it?' 'How do I tell Daryl?' You and Daryl had been only officially dating for 3 and a half months now. The first test had you in denial, the second had you begging. The third had you close to acceptance. At least you weren't ugly crying anymore. Before anything you needed to tell Daryl. So you called him over saying it was urgent.

He opened the front door and jogged to your room seeing you crisscross on the bed looking distraught. He kneeled down at the front of your bed looking up at you. You took in a nervous breath before talking, "If you need a moment after I tell you this, its okay, I wont be mad." Daryl's heart dropped to his ass, 'were you about to end stuff between them?'

"I'm pregnant."

His eyes slowly widened and he looked down to your stomach then back to you. He abruptly stood up then paused again. His mind moving a mile a minute but also not at all. The one thing to click was "A father? ME?' He slowly walked out the room. You sat there with tears burning in your eyes watching him leave the room. He paced back and forth hand running into his hair. The fight or flight in him was telling him to run, he was overwhelmed. Then he heard a small sniffle come from the room he had just come from. That stopped him in his tracks. He thinks he loves you. You both hadn't gotten to saying it out loud to each other. He didn't know what love felt like but this was what he imagined it to be. He hated to see you cry. Made him feel like maybe he would to if he didn't fix your tears. When he heard you he slowly made his way back into the room. Realizing you were most likely as terrifies as him, more so even.

You felt his arms around you making you cry harder. You had run the possibility of him leaving in your mind. Fully aware of his lack of a good father in his life. When you pulled away to look at him he also had tears going down his face. It was the first you have seen him cry. You had now put your arms around his middle and pulled him down to now lay on top of you. You had a tight hold on him and he you. You both calmed down and you knew he wasn't leaving, then he also whispered into you, "I've got ya. Both of ya."

It was rough that first day. It didn't feel real. You told Daryl how you were going to make a appointment in the morning. You asked if he was wanting to go with. He had slowly nodded deep in thought. You had said they could talk about everything in time.

You both had time.

You had an appointment in a week, the receptionist suggesting you go and buy prenatal vitamins before then. You also broke the news to your Aunt, she was supportive. Saying she would love to help with anything you needed. You and her walked a few blocks to a small store connected to a pharmacy. You looked to the shelves of pills. You held two big bottles, different brands, of prenatal vitamins. The sound of screaming alerting you to a disturbance in the store. You turn to your Aunt with a questioning look. You both peaked around the aisle spotting someone on top of the other, a fight perhaps?

Gun shots to your left making you jump. You turned seeing a man backing down the aisle beside you shooting rounds into a woman approaching him. You witnessed the women not even flinch to each shot. Your Aunt pulled you by the shoulder backwards down the lane. Another person who was pale with foggy eyes rounded the corner. It grabbed your Aunt and before you could blink took a bit out of her neck. You watch in horror as she dropped to the ground with that person on top of her. Blood from her throat being ripped out had splattered across your face. You screamed terrified. The lady the man had been shooting at now turned the corner from the aisle they were in. Now she was covered in blood though. You look down to your Aunt who had stopped moving. The thing taking notice of you. So you ran.

You had just seen your Aunt being brutally murdered. You ran out the door of the building pill bottle still in hand. You saw people running, cars crashing. Others getting hit by cars. It was a nightmare but you felt like you need to keep moving. You ran down the road back to your house. Dodging anyone covered in blood.

Daryl had kicked the door open to your house. Merle was packing stuff into the truck across the road. He screamed your name looking for you anywhere. When he couldn’t find you he ran back to the car, “I can’t find her!” Merle rolled his eyes, “Forget about her! She probably died someone where let’s get are asses out of here!” Daryl yelled back at him with rage. “THE IS NO WAY IN HELL IM GOING ANYWHERE WITHOUT HER!” The yell had shocked Merle. Daryl had never talk to him like that. “We can find you a new lady we gotta go!” Then Daryl did something more unexpected. He shoved Merle back. He had hit the side door of the truck, Merle was about to hit him when he yelled, “She’s pregnant man!”

Daryl had a panicked and pained expression on his face. He started to stuttered out, “I-I gotta go look—“ The sound of his name being yelled from a distance made him turn in the direction. He was relieved to see you running full speed toward him. His relief flooded by panic at the sight of blood painted across your face and cloths. He ran the rest of the way to you. Crashing into each other in an embrace. You struggled to regain breath after how long you were running. Daryl had held your face seeing were the blood came from. Tears forming in your eyes, “It’s not mine…” Merle’s voice cutting in, “Come on love birds we gotta go now!”

Daryl lead you to the car opening the door and making you jump in, “Stay here I’m going to get some of your stuff.” He ran off back to your house and Merle started tightening the cables to the bike in the back. He sat down in the driver seat and looked over to you. You had two pill bottles on your lap and you stared at your hands shaking. He then noticed all the blood on you and decided to keep his mouth shut. Daryl ran back throwing a duffel bag in the back before going to the passenger side. You sat in the middle still a little stunned. Like a bird who flew into glass.

Daryl’s arm went behind your head resting on your shoulders. You leaned into him. Merle had started to peel out of the space driving off into a direction. You heard little of the talk between them. Choosing a quarry they know to get away from the towns and head into the woods.

All you knew was the world was changing.

Part 2

Feedback welcomed and requests open!

Sorry for mistakes I to eepy its 2 am. I'm dyslexic and struggle with it and normally reread 10 times to fix mistakes but this is so long I wanna go to bed.

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl imagines #daryl x female reader #daryl fanfiction #twd daryl #norman reedus #angst #fluff #smut

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hughiecampbelle · 4 months ago

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The Boys Preference: Watching Reality TV

Requested: a request for the boys preferences, how would they react with f!reader live watching reality tv shows like Kardashian’s etc, would they love it - anon

A/N: Hope you like it my love! This was really fun to imagine :D My old roommate loved reality TV and I swear I heard so much about it it feels like I've watched it for myself lol. Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Butcher says what you watch is ridiculous, but, much like a dad who says this, he'll stand behind you and watch entire episodes. Only after it's ended does he throw a fit, claiming that was the dumbest thing he's ever seen and it's rotting your brain. When you talk about it with the rest of your friends, the latest episode or drama, Butcher is full of strong opinions and will tell you to your face this person is a c-nt and that person deserves better. You don't make a big deal out of this, though you share knowing looks with everyone else. He's not very good at hiding his interest in reality TV, but you also don't want to scare him away. You like watching it with him, you like his opinions. It's not often he shows interest in something outside of work. If this can offer a thirty-minute distraction, you're more than willing to share.

Hughie doesn't personally love it, but he would never tell you to stop watching it. He asks you questions about the people and the latest episodes. He never forgets who is who and forms his own opinions about the shows having never watched them. He likes that he can show interest in something you love. The least he can do is listen to you talk about it. When you and someone else are debating the drama and unpacking the story, he definitely shares his own ideas. He listens so carefully it's as if he actually watched it with you. If he catches you watching it, he'll sit beside you and put faces to names. He finds it incredible that his idea of these people was so wrong, yet so right. He really has nothing against reality TV and if it makes you happy, that's what matters. He uses it to bond with you more than anything else.

Annie has pretty neutral feelings about reality TV. She might watch half an episode with you, but it's just never been her thing. She's not going to pull a Butcher and make fun of you for liking it, but she's not going to go out of her way to ask you about your thoughts on the newest episode/season. It's just one of those things that aren't for her. Still, she can't deny how happy it makes you and she's glad you have some sort of distraction from all the craziness of your jobs. She makes sure not to interrupt your TV time and will pass you notes instead of distracting you, hoping it's less disruptive. When you and M.M. sit together and bond over your love for it, it can't help but make her smile. You two need this. A break from the drama and life and death for more silly drama about relationships and brands and family.

M.M. loves reality TV. He tries to never miss an episode. When he does, he's horrendous about spoilers. He will yell across the room for you not to spoil anything when you're telling Hughie about the latest drama. He acts like a child, placing his hands over his ears. You two sit together all night and binge the newest seasons. Sometimes, when it's been a while, you'll re-watch the last seasons so that when the new episodes start, you'll know what's going on. He always shares whatever snacks he's gathered and is a stickler about talking while the show is playing. If you can, he'll pause it so that you can unpack the drama. If not, you'll have to wait for commercials. Since he was placed in charge of The Boys, he's had less time to indulge in this vice. He's more lenient about spoilers which you find sad, but you do your best to give a good break down of the show.

Frenchie watches it with you, but he's pretty vocal about his distaste for their actions. If someone crosses someone or cheats on someone or gets in a fight, he's the first to be standing, yelling at the TV, throwing snacks at the screen. It always makes you laugh and more often than not you have to calm him down before watching the rest of the show. He just gets so worked up. Especially when they're doing stupid stuff that'll get them in more trouble. You've learned quite a few French swears from these tantrums. Sometimes he gets so worked up he has to walk away, watching the rest in his own time so that he doesn't disturb your enjoyment. He has so many opinions and makes it known that certain people are favored over others. He comes to their defense so fast it actually makes you laugh and defends their actions regardless of how petty or downright bad they are.

Kimiko doesn't watch it. She's not too interested in TV, but she can understand the appeal. Between you and Frenchie, she knows basically everything about the people and the plot, asking questions as if she's been watching the whole time. She loves how happy it makes you. Everyone on this team needs a healthy outlet. She noticed that your typical partner in crime (M.M.) hasn't been around to watch it and, not wanting you to feel the absence, Frenchie stepped up. If neither are around, she'll join you, working on something else that grabs her attention, but mostly she just likes the idea of just being with you. Every so often her attention will be grabbed and she'll understand why you like it so much, but overall it's more of an opportunity to just be with you. Be in your company. You don't notice this happening until it's happened a few times. It makes you feel seen by your friends, appreciated by them.

Bonus! Homelander thinks it's absolutely ridiculous. He stands behind you and will take a few minutes to watch (completely out of context) before deciding whatever show you're watching is shallow, and fake, and idiotic. He makes his opinion known of course and actively shows his disgust anytime he catches you watching it. He can't ban it from Vought Tower, though he's thought about it. Homelander doesn't watch very much TV as it is besides the news and a few select channels. Overall he thinks TV in general makes people stupid and reality TV is at the top of the list. He doesn't care how much you like it or the lore behind the stories, all he sees are six pack abs, and lip filler, and people doing dumb things to get famous. If you're talking about it with Firecracker or The Deep you know the conversation ends in Homelanders presence.

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cherrytea556 · 1 year ago

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Lore Rekindled; The Lore Olympus that should have been

To be honest, I checked out the rekindled version before the original one and now having reading the original as well, it's extremely odd. Y'know goodbye volcanic high where the original was a mess but a group of 4chaners made a parody game which turned out to be of better quality than the original? This is like that but replace 4chan with tumblr users, mainly @genericpuff whose series is pinned in their tumblr blog where you can check all of the episodes, especially updated ones. In this post, I will be praising this series of how it fixes the problems of the original

The Pacing

One thing I notice about lore olympus and lore rekindled is the pacing. Not just the flow of the story but where it chooses to focus on. Now in lore olympus, the pacing is kinda a mess and its mainly to do with what it focuses on. An example is the magazine plotpoint; in the original, its basically kinda there in between doses to focus on other stuff like persephone and hades together, persephone's sa (i'll get to that later), eros story, zeus and hera etc...The flow generally isnt that bad per say (except for persephone's sa cuz that was way too quick) but for a story meant to be a romance between hades and persephone, you'd think it idk, it would focus on persephone and hades specifically, not eros which is another example of; its flashbacks. Eros specifically has such a dragged out flashback in episode 12 which we didnt need or at least with that much exposition when it should've naturally expand in the story and that's what rekindled does. The magazine plotline has turned into the first conflict of persephone and hades as we see how it affects their lives and relationships. This works for its pacing better because it doesn't give you too much stuff to jumble with, making the narrative more concise and easier to understand where the story is going. And with the flashbacks, rekindled cuts out the fat in the flashbacks from the original to a perfect balance where it gives exposition of the characters while also leaving mystery for the audience to be intrigued, my favourite one would have to be this (though it more of a nightmare than a flashback specifically speaking);

It's of persephone in a greenhouse her mother placed her in with this red eye thing following her from outside the greenhouse. I have no idea of this lurker if its her metaphorical rage or a danger in her life but either way, i am intrigued by its presentation.

The Characters

When reading lore rekindled and lore olympus, the characters are definetly an odd experience. For lore olympus, the characters arent exactly uh....great per say. I think the main reason for this is how their ultilised, with characters like eros, hera, hectate etc being there to mostly be a matchmaker for hades and persephone even if it was initially seen as wrong like with hera and hectate, be antagonistic as a way to have conflict between hades and persephone like minthe, demeter and recently leuce even if ones had reasons too like minthe with hades emotionally cheating on her and demeter because lets be honest, she had a point. Then there's hades and persephone, whoo boy where to start with them.

Hades starts off as a creep eyeing at persephone during a party, specifically at her body and still lusts persephone even being aware that shes 19 and he's 2000 years old. Also is a shitty boss, father AND contributes to slavery with it while being adressed in some way, doesnt change him which isnt good for a character that's meant to be the main protagonists love interest.

Persephone though, I can get the self insert vibes. From favouritism towards the story, being who most of the men in the story are attracted too, portrayed as a 'cinnamon roll' (they actually said that early on in the story, im not kidding) who cant do no wrong. She acts like a teenager rather than a young adult which makes the scenes where shes sexualised just more uncomfortable (and they already unnecessarily were) along with adding that uncomfortability to the romance

But with rekindled, they expanded on the characters much more than they originally were. Persephone for instance has turned from a 'sexy baby' legal teenager to an actual young relatable adult with agency and allows her to screw up (e.g, getting drunk on her own rather than eros drunking her). Her adult attitude makes the romance between her and hades not only more palpable, but also strays away from the infantilisation/uncomfortable sexualisation of her character which is nice to see. Hades also is written well in the series from how it acknowledges his faults while still making him likable. And thats the same for every character really, their personalities are much more fleshed out and nuanced which makes their characters feel real to life, gaining effectiveness for more emotional scenes with them. An interesting thing too is that they even expanded the magazine guy's character from making fake news for profit into feeling guilt over what they done, standing up for persephone which is a pretty nice change.

No Sa Plotline

Not like you cant have sa in your story ever but if you never planned it from the beginning and only did when people tell you that the scene you drew from your comic was sa then....maybe just not do it. Lore olympus does exactly that where while an attempt was made, it goes on to retcon it into making apollo (the guy who sa'd persephone) into a lesser evil like that would made a difference instead of just cutting it out from the very beginning. Lore rekindled thankfully just made apollo into his pilot version, a shitty bf but more likeable and expanded upon (which should have been his portrayal from day 1). His shittiness doesnt come up in the story, more like self absorbness/egotisticalness although with its recent chapter of the magazine guy offering persephone lunch, it might reveal some cracks or at least further down the story it will be revealed to us which futhers how effective rekindled character writing is in how its expansion of characters would give us the feels. That or portray him as not a good match for persephone, either way much better than the original.

Artstyle

Lore olympus has a pretty good artstyle (at least in s1/the early episodes, s3 is just kinda goofy) but lore rekindled has got a good artstyle which is on top, more consistent too. Here's some examples;

Comedy

It's objectively funnier than lore olympus, no question asked

All in all, if you want to read lore olympus, i recommend you to read the lore rekindled one instead as it's better in every way. Give it a read.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore rekindled #generic puff #genericpuff

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mysterycitrus · 11 months ago

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Hey!! Love your art and your meta posts. I was wondering about your thoughts on something because I don't think I've ever really read about much of it in canon (might be missing something though), but do the batkids have their own Brucie Wayne-esque personas? I figure they'd be expected to act a certain way, like they've been taking in by a party loving play boy, they're gonna be a at least somewhat spoilt social butterflies right? I just can't stop thinking about the kids hitting like teenhood and having to adopt and put on that kind of act because it would be a little suspicious if nothing about Brucie rubbed off on them. Maybe they steal Bruce's cars or crash a gala, something staged just for the tabloids like that. Idk, I just find the idea of (most of) the kids not being raised anything like that and having to act up in the name of keeping their identities safe really interesting because I don't think they'd find it fun, I think it would actually gross them out to throw around money and act like brats.

lovely anon this is SUCH a fun question and i shall answer it in parts. the first is this — what is the purpose of the bruce wayne persona?

bruce created a specific public image of himself for several reasons — to deflect any suspicion that he’s batman, to justify his frequent disappearances from the public eye, and to be consistently underestimated by people he was in opposition with (gothams corrupt elite, the gcpd, etc). the popular interpretation of this is that he’s like a kardashian, but to be honest id say he’s a lot more like a donatella versace— relatively reclusive but who occasionally pops up doing the weirdest shit ever. he posts on dick’s insta like bruce WAYNE ❤️

wrt his kids, no, i don’t think many of them have that sort of glamorised persona. part of it is that the “gala” trope in fandom just…… doesn’t really exist in the comics? like bruce will take vicki vale to an event, or go to a luthercorp thing to gather intel, but the idea of everyone hitting up an event at the gotham four seasons is not a common story beat. and even then, again, the performance has a purpose outside of just being a distraction.

in particular, u have to consider how his kids are different from bruce. jason and dick were both lower class, if not actively below the poverty line and acting spoiled won’t win them any favours. cass straight up isn’t interested in that kind of performance. damian is honest to a fault. duke has his own family that he’s proud of. when u consider that damian and cass and duke and dick also aren’t white, u have to think about how acting like a glitzy idiot would help them in the same way it would bruce. short answer — it very much wouldnt. many people will think less of them regardless. it would be dehumanising, and because none of them have that same degree of disconnection from the standard person that bruce has, how would them being seen as spoiled idiots help them?

dick has always lived with civilian neighbours, had civilian jobs, and fostered civilian relationships. him being a cop was bad, but he takes a lot of pride in being someone who’s like… dependable. a good neighbour. jason is legally dead, but he wouldn’t have wanted to be seen as the dumb poor kid either. cass would probably play with peoples expectations of her, but not like an established persona that she has to take on. duke is, again, very attached to his family and where he grew up, and is very aware of assumptions people might make about that. damian would rather kill himself than pretend to be an idiot. tim, again, is a strong maybe, but i also don’t think he’d give a shit. he really values keeping himself as tim drake intact, away from robin. he wants to keep being himself.

i just think most of them would stay out of the public eye. remember — bruce isn’t active online. there is still massive control over released information about him, especially with babs. i think they would purposely make themselves boring and unassuming.

the short answer is that none of them, truly, possess bruce’s raw commitment to the bit.

#bruce Wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #Cassandra cain #duke Thomas #batman #damian wayne #nightwing #dc comics #red hood #robin #the ask and the answer

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ralibo14 · 3 months ago

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TPN Brainrots part 1:

Another TPN manga panel redraw, but this time everyone goes down with me (because it's sad).

Also part one of my 'wonderful' tpn theories and head canons. It'll be long😅. There will be manga spoilers so please, read at your own risk😊.

First character I go through is... Ray.

He is one of the most complicated characters I ever saw (all tpn characters are, tbh). I always thought that people who have photographic memory are so lucky. Ray showed me that it's both a blessing and the curse.

Like in the picture above. You can clearly see that the first 2 kid waving at his direction. It's strange to know that there was a time when the Trio were one of the young kids and not the older ones. My first head canon is that Ray tried to save more kids, not just Emma and Norman when he was younger. When the blond haired boy leaves (first panel) he looks like he is about to cry (also the Trio is around 4 or 6) but when the other kids get 'adopted' Ray keeps his head low most of the frames (I'm convinced that when the second kid left he was already working as Isabella's spy.)

Ray coloration explained:

Purple eyes are self explanatory to me. I started draw him with purple eyes as soon as I found out he is Isabella's son. Purple in the hair and freckles? Well... I'm still very, very convinced that Leslie didn't die (at least not when he left the House). I always think about his situation, like what Norman got into with Lambda. The Ratri-clan is big but they need outsiders, to be soldiers, scientists, etc. And since girls from the Houses can only become Sisters and Moms... maybe some boys can become scientists and soldiers. (I can't believe I'm writing this but think about Andrew🤢... he was 100% not Ratri yet he could become an adult). So by this logic I believe Leslie could grow up too and (because I'm a sucker for happiness) he met Isabella again at some point.

Ray turning away:

On the second frame he is not looking at the girl who is leaving, but to the opposite direction. Why? Notice something else? Yes, Norman is missing too. Gilda has her winter jumper on so I figure Norman got sick again. Ray priorities his friends safety over everything else.

Also notice how Emma and Norman slowly get into the middle of the frame while Mom/Isabella get out of it? Pretty strong metaphor. It's the perfect example of 'Blood related family ≠ real family'. And while I'm a RayEmma shipper (obviously aged up version) I would never forget about Norman. He is as important to Ray as Emma. This Trio sticks together no matter what.

(older manga colouring ⬇️)

Now onto the hearth breaking stuff:

Ray's relationship with Isabella:

This deleted scene with Ray and Ayshe lives rent free in my head. Like there are two people with similar family situations and the one who lived int the middle of nowhere with a demon parent thinks positively about their parent, while the other, who grew up in a comfortable home like space with a human parent, thinks the opposite.

"But to me, she was always a monster"– Ray.

Like ufff... This sentence hits real hard. And it's low-key true from Ray perspective. He studied and read all the books in the House, not because he was interested, but because he had to. Norman is a genius, Emma learns real fast, Ray does everything he can to always get max points on his tests. But he also secretly planning his friends excape. Collects scraps of technology to build the device which makes them able to excape, plans his own 💀 carefully, so no one else will get hurt and on a top of that he is 'spying' for Isabella. Sacrifices people he wanted to protect. I can't imagine that inside panic when he didn't get max scores to that one test. I'm sure he was happy because Norman and Emma got their regular scores, but deep down he felt like he failed.

My head canon here is that Ray always gets nightmares if he is alone or in an unsafe place. And 'thanks' to his perfect memory his nightmares build up from actual memories (like we see that in the Seven Wall Arc). Also he doesn't get sick often but when he does... it's like a memory fuelled fever dream, with hallucinations and etc.

Ray's healing journey starts after the Jailbreak Arc. As soon as Mom is not around anymore, he ever so slowly starts to let down his guard and starts to show more and more emotions. His relationship with Yuugo/Mister is like a greatest archivment in his case. The playful, sarcastic 'arguments' and the way he openly said his opinion on things in front of Yuugo and Lucas. Shows how much he changed and opened up.

Isabella on the other hand... her change of heart and feelings were a mistery almost to the very end. To be honest I hated her most of the time, until the Back to Grace Field Arc. (Older manga colouring again⬇️😅)

Two things in this page which are very important.

1: Ray's guard is up again in no time, when he sees Isabella, while her emotionless mask is cracking. This is the first time we get a little inside of how she really feels about Ray.

2: Flashback of the two most important things that connects them. The song and the way they were forced to sacrifice others to stay alive.

The lullaby is very important, because it's calming and feels very intimate (like a normal parent-child relationship should be).

You also can't convince me otherwise that Ray didn't hummed this lullaby at least once in the B06-32 shelter to help the youngest kids fall asleep.

And now... onto the last picture. Their goodbye.

Saddest part ever! Never forgiving for this decision.

Ray and Isabella were never allowed to talk even two short sentences with each other without any consequences. In the House they had to play their assigned roles. Then they didn't see each other for almost 2 years. Finally they had to save half of the team from getting unalived... And they moment they would have time the last twist happens... leaving us with a sad ending.

Epilogue and Human World Arc...does little to compensate. Although I can't get over the fact that Yuugo's, Conny's and Isabella's 'ghosts' helped Ray found Emma in the Human World.

Speaking of finding Emma. My last head canon for Ray is the following;

When they found out that Emma lost all of her memories from the Demon World. Ray couldn't help himself but whisper a "I wish this happened to me". And everyone looks at him with an understanding smile thinking he blames himself for this... But in reality he really just selfishly thought (only for seconds) that he could forget everything happened on the other side.

Okay. That's all. Sorry for the supper long post and I'm forever thankful if you read through my brainrots 🥰😘. Also let me know if I should cover more characters like this. I'll obviously do Emma and Norman but if there any other characters you want to see please let me know🥰🤩💖.

#the promised neverland #tpn #tpn ray #yakusoku no neverland #tpn theories #tpn head canons #fan theories #the brainrot is real #head canon #a really really long post #long post #tpn manga #manga coloring #tpn isabella

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lilis-doodle-dome · 1 year ago

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Mafukasa swap au, with in game screen cap edits

Things that swapped:

- Parents level of overbearing (Tenma’s are incredibly suffocating, while mafumom is well intentioned but left mfy alone far too much)

- roles in the group (Emu is WxS’ leader, while Mafuyu is Niigo’s)

- appearance of Sekai (Tsukasa has a more monochrome/depressing vibe, while Mfy’s is fanciful and colorful)

- outward persona (Tsukasa is the golden boy, perfect at everything, well mannered, etc. while Mafuyu is outgoing, confident, helpful (even when it’s not asked for), etc.)

Things that did not swap:

- Gender, and therefore school’s they go to

- which group they’re in

- familial situation outside of parents (Tsukasa is still Saki’s older brother and the Tenma’s are still close with the Aoyagi’s, Mfy is still a single child)

- Tsukasa is still the one with memory issues, so Mafuyu is influenced by bad memories from her past from the get go instead of slowly remembering them (she is still completely unwilling to actually engage with said memories even if she remembers them though)

- Which VS’s they start with (Mafuyu is just miku, Tsukasa is Miku and Kaito)

Other important things: (if interested)

- Saki and Tsukasa’s relationship is a lot more strained, Saki has incredibly conflicting feelings about her brother and Tsukasa always has his front up, even around her, so they can’t have a proper conversation

- Toya also has a stilted relationship with Kasa, both the Tenma’s and his father tended to compare the two boys. So while he still looks up to Tsukasa, he has some reservations about weather his admiration is genuine or just feelings implanted in him from the adults. Toya’s much closer with Saki, as he visited her a lot in the hospital (initially at Tsukasa’s request)

- Mafmom is a single mom, and a doctor. Needless to say she is busy *a lot*, bcs of that she’s always needed Mafuyu to be self sufficient and responsible, far before the age one could reasonably except for a child. She still loves Mafuyu very much and always tries her best to give her daughter a free and happy life

- Rather than an actor, Mafuyu found her passion in writing poetry. She wants to become the best poet of all time, which is what leads her to writing lyrics for K’s songs. Only the best composer could possibly support the best lyricist after all!

- Mafuyu’s love of writing comes from remembering all the times in the past her mom would come home late at night, looking exhausted both physically and emotionally, mfy would stay up to see her and then the two would cuddle under the blankets and read together. In those moments it would really feel like none of the rest of the day existed and all those pains and anxieties would slip away from her mother as they were transported to another world in their stories

- some time into this ritual, mafuyu started writing her own stories for her mother, and while Mafumom said she loved all of Mafu’s writing there was something special about her poetry that completely dispelled all of mafumom’s bad feelings and just let her live in the lines of text

- after that poetry became mafuyu’s life, and her Sekai is built off her desire to help people feel better with her work.

- Tsukasa’s Sekai also doesn’t match canon mafuyu’s it’s not built off his desire to disappear, instead it’s his desire to be his own person and figuring out who he even is in the first place (the other three can enter his sekai due to their shared desire of wanting to be themselves without getting hurt for it)

- Tsukasa hopes that by acting, he might resonate with a role and it’ll help him learn more about himself

- since they’re in the images, fun fact, Ruikasa kizuna rank title is ‘charity case’ (in place of 1-2 weirdo wombo combo) due to people assuming perfect, golden boy Tsukasa only started spending time with Rui because Teachers were hoping he would keep Rui out of trouble and get other students to look at Rui more favorably (thus Rui is Tsukasa’s ‘charity case’)

- while kanamafu’s kizuna rank is ‘please take a break’ due to both of them trying to constantly get the other to take better care of themselves. Mafuyu always saying Kanade needs to eat and sleep rather than composing all the time, while Kanade is desperately trying to make Mafuyu realize that working all day and putting ‘110%’ into everything she does, is infact unhealthy and not ‘the work ethic every good writer should strive for’ (it is not working on either end, Kanade is too guilty and mafuyu is too deep in denial)

I have a lot for this au, but making certain things is,,, difficult. To say the least

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mahi-wayy · 5 months ago

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𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐀 | ᴀ. ʀᴀᴍᴀ ʀᴀᴊᴜ

ᴘᴀɪʀɴɪɴɢ : A. Rama Raju x Fem!Oc

ғᴀɴᴅᴏᴍ : RRR

ʟᴇɴɢᴛʜ : 2.4k

ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴs : ssr levels of angst, strained relationship, arguments, ram being a emotional mess but still trying his best like always.

sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ : 𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇 ram tries his best but still fails to keep a promise.

ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

_______________

Alluri Sitarama Raju was a busy man, an extremely complicated, dedicated and smart one too.

He was a man of his word, a great son, an extraordinary officer, exceptionally intelligent, a great strategist, a great on field leader etc. etc. but what most people and very sadly he himself forgets often is that he was a husband too.

Married to his childhood friend and the only other person who knew about his past, other than Babai of course, Vadehi.

Their tale was an interesting one; he first met Vadehi, he was barely twelve. He had accompanied Babai, who found him sitting by his mother's corpse motionless, to Delhi to live with him and fulfil his father's mission.

He was weird in people's eyes, a twelve year old who neither laughs nor plays with other boys, never smiles and is always studying, without a break. He attracted some really good amount of attention his way for the first few months.

It was around the fifth month when he first met her, if asked Ram can still recollect the evening like it was yesterday, he was outside the house, waiting for Babai to get off his duty.

Sitting on the steps with his legs pulled up and a book in hand, he really was not feeling interacting with anyone, like usual. That was when a ball hit his book knocking it off from his hands, he gave the young boys playing around a look, who apologised and he kicked the ball back.

Not even ten minutes back to reading, the ball hit his book again, he glares at them this time and kicks the ball back harder than before.

The third time he caught them in his peripheral, purposely setting up to hit the ball at him once again and this time he was going to hit back. He pretended to not notice one of the boys taking aim at him, his head to be specific, but the impact never came.

He looked up to check only to find the most interesting sight, all five of the boys were sitting on their knees and apologising as a girl grilled them with her words. She was young too, maybe a year or two older than him but not more than that.

It was two more minutes before she turned to him and held one of her ear as if apologising on the boy's behalf.

Ram after a long time felt the corner of his lips twitch up in a small, subtle smile and it earned him a pleasantly surprised reaction from the girl who just waved at him and rushed off.

That was the first time he saw Vadehi, the niece of the newly moved neighbour, Balan Krishnamurthi, an Indian constable in the British force.

He was freshly transferred from Karnataka to Delhi and Vadehi didn't have a mother or father, as long as she could remember it was just Balan and her.

Ram found her tolerable, that's what he told himself in the beginning, they used to sit together and study, in silence. Since she was older not many boys or girls preferred playing with her, neither did she seem interested.

She was a little aloof much like himself but she did get into arguments once a week when the boys bother them. It was secretly entertaining for Ram to watch it, all of the boys just sitting and taking a tongue lashing from her.

She wanted to be a doctor, he remembers the sparkle in those beautiful brown orbs as she went on and on about her dreams.

But some dreams were meant to be shattered.

They were twenty and twenty two respectively when it happened, Ram had just come back from his exam for the police force to find an unusual amount of people standing around Vadehi's house.

While he was not fond of people or social interactions in any form or colour the way his stomach churned made him push through the crowd to come face to face with probably the most blood he has ever seen ever since that day in his village.

He could feel the nausea climbing up his throat as he looked at the dead figure Balan Krishnamurthi, the man was bleeding from a head injury and a stab wound in his abdomen.

But what worried him more was the motionless figure sitting beside the body, Vadehi was being subjected to all sorts of comments as she just stared at her now dead uncle and it just made the trauma hit Ram harder than ever.

He could see his mother and him in the scene in front of him and it was making him more and more anxious, his throat closing and stomach churning as he stepped towards the female.

Ram has no idea how situations like these were handled, it was usually Vadehi who took charge of things like this and gave him freedom to focus on one thing, that being his father's mission, at a time.

So when she flinches when he touches her shoulder, he flinches with her. He took a short breath before kneeling to her level while all she did was stare at him, the empty gaze slowly filling with emotions made it a little easier for him.

He forces a small sympathetic smile while cupping her face and the dam breaks, Vadehi just lunges forward clinging to him, crying like no tomorrow and it catches him off guard before his arms come to wrap around her figure.

That one incident and babai's decision to have her stay with them changed their lives, since everyone witnessed her crying and refusing to let go and then staying with him, alone for most of the day since babai had a duty to report to, people started talking.

The statements being passed around were offending and disgusting, people talk, both of them knew that but questioning a girl who has lost her only family three weeks ago was a new level of low.

With things getting a little out of hand and seeing how both of them struggled with it, Vankteshwarlu came up with the idea of their marriage and with a little convincing they got married exactly a month after.

In the present, it has been four years, four years of their marriage and four years of falling in love. Ram wasn't really sure when it happened but he started liking Vadehi a lot more than just a girl he grew up with and vice-versa.

The first few months were a little mechanical but the transition from friends to husband-wife was smooth after that, they never really realised when the relationship grew and turned into something more.

But the last year and past few months have been rough, Ram has been a little distant lately, he knows but things have been tough, very very tough. For example, last month was his fifth failed attempt at getting that promotion and as much as he expected this behaviour it's frustrating to no end.

He knew the whites won't favour him even for their life but why has his down God turned his back to him is beyond him. Why is he testing him like this again and again? What has he ever done to anyone? What is he doing wrong?

All this inner turmoil was affecting his personal life, it started with him forgetting his own birthday, for which Vadehi prepared a rich family dinner, he entered home twelve in the night and by that time the babai had gone home and he had Vadehi asleep on the dining table with the food waiting for him.

She forgave him for it.

The next miss judgement happened on her birthday, he has promised to be home by seven but didn't make it till ten, leaving Vadehi alone, since babai was out of town too, in her own day.

He was able to earn forgiveness for that too somehow.

The third mistake and the first argument happened exactly a month ago, their fourth anniversary.

She had again and again asked him if he would be able to make it till ten and he had agreed that he will but like the first time he couldn't, he came home at twelve and for the first time he had dinner alone.

The female wasn't ready to hear a word he wanted to say, he still remembers the shouting match that happened in their bedroom.

“Vadehi! Vadehi listen to me- LISTEN TO ME!!” He had yelled, grabbing her arm and turning her to face him; she would have looked beautiful in the red anarkali and jewellery if her kohl lined eyes weren't full of angry tears.

“Listen to what huh? Listen to what Ram!? another duty calls explanation."

“Try to understand Vadehi, this is important to me.”

“I KNOW THAT DAMN IT!!"

That was the first time he has heard her yell like that.

“I know what you do and how and why it's important to you Ram, I am aware of it that's why I asked you didn't I, I asked you again and again if you would be able to make it, didn't I?”

Now truly had no answer, she had asked him and he did say he would. He looks up when his palms slip around his face.

“Listen to me Ram okay? I am not asking you to stop moving towards your goal or to stop this fight against these disgusting white men, no that's not what I am asking. All I want from you is to not forget me, don't leave me behind Ram, please.”

“I won't.”

He still doesn't believe that the cracking, shivering voice was his as he begged for her forgiveness and she just held him for that night.

Things almost went back to normal, he made sure to make an effort to not leave his wife behind, everything seemed to be going alright but like he has said before many times, his life doesn't like him being happy or normal.

She has reminded him, this morning, again and again that it was karva chauth and he has to make it in time or at least let her know if he can't and he once again has told her that he would.

But look at him now, standing in front of his own home, scared out of his mind. No matter what he did, he just couldn't bring himself to open the door and face his wife, who had not eaten or drank anything for his sake.

He, who was coming back at three in the morning.

Extremely nervous and his stomach dropping he opened the door and his legs almost gave out on him. There she was, sitting in one of the chairs with a pooja ki thaal in her lap. The diya had gone out a long time back from the looks of it.

Her face was blank, he has seen her like this once before and it doesn't feel right at all.

Dressed in a beautiful red saree, her mangalsutra shining bright under the weakening moonlight, her hair half pulled back where a little messy from her resting her head against the chair, she looked extremely tired and then his eyes fell on the dining table.

It looked like a buffet and his heart dropped further as the guilt weighed on his shoulders.

He could feel a lump in his throat, how bad can he be to keep her waiting like this, how the hell did he lose track of time so easily, especially today of all days.

Ram says nothing, he lets his instincts guide him, dropping to the floor beside her feet, his forehead coming to rest against her knee, his palm holding one of her feet while the other guides her second feet to rest on his leg.

He doesn't know what to say, he never does and in a situation like this he wasn't even sure if he even had a right to say something.

So he just sits, holding her feet like they were his life, like letting them go will take away his ability to breathe from him.

After what seems like eternity but we're only fifteen minutes, Vadehi moves. She brushes a hand through his hair and moves her feet away, standing up and pulling him with her.

She says nothing, just picks up the plate from the table and disappears inside. She comes back in less than ten minutes, the thal set again, a new diya illuminating her blank features.

She stops infront of him, both of them just starring at each other before she takes his hand with one of her own and walks outside to the porch.

The moon is drifting behind the clouds but still shines brightly as she sets the thal down on a stool and covers her head before picking up the sieve, placing the diya in it before looking at the moon through it.

He feels a little sick when he stares at him through the fine net, he can read the disappointing hurt into those blank eyes but can't bring himself to say anything.

“For this karva chauth, along with your long life I wish that every father gets a son like you and every country gets a soldier like you…”

Her tone is disturbingly stable as she speaks, offering the water to the moon before turning to him and bending to touch his feet.

“But may not any woman gets a husband like you.”

That broke his heart, into a million pieces.

He sees tears slowly filling her eyes before letting her veil slip from her head as she rushes inside, his feet takes him after her but all gets is the bedroom door being shut in his face.

It was okay, he made a mistake, he will take the consequences.

“Vadehi, I'm not deserving even for consideration of forgiveness but I am selfish, I am bad, I am weak. I will take anything you want, don't talk to me, don't wait for me, don't cook for me. Don't do anything I will take it all but please please don't leave me. I don't know what I will do without you please don't leave me.”

After years and years, Ram feels tears flowing down his cheeks as he begs for the woman to not leave him, he gets no verbal reponse, slowly sliding down the door as he sobbed.

That night all that could be the audible sobs of a man scared to be left alone and the muffled sobs of a wife who was hurt and angry.

_______________

taglist : @warnermeadowsgirl @mayakimayahai @vijayasena @maraudersbitchesassemble @ramcharantitties [let me know if you wanna be added or removed!!]

#rrr #rrr fanfic #rama raju #rama raju x fem!oc #ramaraju x reader #ram charan fic #ram charan #south indian fanfic

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sponfawn · 2 months ago

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MTH Meta - Sisterhood of the PPGs

For anon who asked for a post on the Girls' relationships, specifically wrt Buttercup not opening up to her sisters, Blossom not telling Buttercup about what happened with Brick, and why they never actually address their issues. Hope you like long posts.

Full disclosure, I am an only child and my friends who had siblings mostly had brothers or a large age gap with their sisters, so if anyone else has other thoughts, pls feel free to share!

Blossom and Buttercup are really interesting to me. In some ways they have extremely similar motivations, it's just that the methods and approaches they use are near opposites. Ive said in another post that they both try to prevent being objectified by dressing and acting in certain ways. But to go into this further, they both have quite a bit of internalized misogyny behind that. They are both very conscious of their reputations and take measures to maintain them, and they both have self-imposed ideas about what it means about them if they don't reinforce those roles/expectations. Those roles and reputations are very tied up in their identities. They are both proud ppl who like to keep their emotional lives quite private, and who see certain displays of emotion as shows of weakness. Where Blossom uses self control, rationality, and "maturity" to hide her vulnerability, Buttercup uses anger, violence, and occasionally humor.

I think I will start with Buttercup, because I was a lot like her for many years, and I think I understand her better than Blossom.

Buttercup has built her very public reputation on being the "toughest" of the Girls since they were 5 (really since they were created). Since they were kids, she has teased Bubbles for being openly emotional and sensitive. And I think for many people, especially kids, when you have a reputation for something it can be very difficult to step outside of those expectations. It can be easier if one has a change of environment where people don't have preconceptions of who you are or what you're like. But Buttercup has never had that luxury, because as a public figure who has only ever lived in Townsville, everyone knows who she is and they all have certain expectations of what she's like.

This is also true of Blossom and Bubbles, but I think at least in Bubbles' case her expectations are a bit less restraining. At least emotionally. People tend to underestimate her, but she is comfortable with putting them in their place when she feels it's needed (see the face she made that actually scared Brick when she visited the Boys' apartment for the first time). Her reputation is being cute and "the joy and the laughter" of the Girls, and while that can also be restrictive in theory, we don't really see that holding her back from getting mad or upset.

Brene Brown has a theory on shame (through a v binary gender lens but I think it's applicable here). For most (cishet) men, she uses a metaphor of a box. Inside the box are behaviors/etc that a person considers acceptable in terms of masculinity, and behaviors outside of the box tend to elicit shame because they do not adhere to the perceived "rules" of masculinity and thus show "weakness". Obviously Buttercup is not a cishet man, and I'm not sure that I would go so far as to say she experiences shame outside that box. But her reputation and internalized misogyny act similarly, as a box outside of which certain behaviors are "weak" and seen as embarrassing. We can see this when she tells Butch to act like she didn't cry, when she thinks about how stupid it was for her to get a dress with Mitch, when she is at the kitchen store and hopes that no one she knows sees her there. She has a set of self-imposed "rules" about what she "shouldn't" show to other people that ends up restricting her a lot in terms of her ability to be vulnerable with others. With Mitch, she was able to break some of those "rules" because he knew her in a way she thought her sisters and others didn't, and because he reinforced her private (albeit limited) vulnerability with approval and affection.

Buttercup communicates more through actions than words. It may partly be just a natural preference but for some ppl it's because verbal communication can feel more vulnerable or difficult, because it is so specific and straightforward, if that makes sense. In the og show, Buttercup even has trouble with the vulnerability of just saying sorry. Angry confrontations and physical fights are her forte. Otherwise emotional confrontations? Not so much. We see this with Mitch and the guys in the earlier chapters, and even with Butch when she feels like a moment is too intimate and distances herself.

She has a sort of fear of other people perceiving her vulnerability to begin with, and i think in some ways that aversion may be even stronger or more deep seated with her sisters. If her experience was anything like mine, showing signs of mildly uncharacteristic softness may have been met with teasing or may have been brought up later at inopportune moments. We know that Bubbles teases her, and while idt Bubbles would do so if she thought Buttercup was genuinely hurt and vulnerable (though she didn't pull punches around Buttercup's breakup on their first day of the winter semester), small jabs like that over the years can go a long way to reinforcing some behaviors and discouraging certain others. There's also the fact that sometimes the people who have known you intimately your whole life can be the hardest to break behavioral patterns with. Our brains create these sort of well-worn paths with thought and behavioral patterns we use often, and those are the paths we automatically take. And if those paths have been reinforced for your whole life, it's especially hard to break out of. It's definitely possible, but one has to work hard for it.

All of this is to say - there are over a decade of precedents that likely reinforced Buttercup's struggles with verbal communication and vulnerability, and a lot of it is tied up with her sense of self and others' expectations. Teens in general also tend to be less than amazing at communication especially if they haven't had therapy. At the moment, there are more reasons than not why Buttercup doesn't confide in or bring up her complicated relationship with her sisters and the ways she feels hurt by them. As frank and unfiltered as she can be on the surface, she is very avoidant and cagey about her internal experiences when it doesn't directly involve anger.

Blossom, interestingly enough, has a LOT of the same issues with public perception, identity, and vulnerability. Going back to Brene Brown, she uses a metaphor of a web to describe cishet women's experiences, where there are many things that one has to juggle perfectly that intersect with various roles in one's identity (eg one's roles as a parent, spouse, employee, daughter, friend, etc). Perceived shortfalls in any of these areas can trigger shame associated with one or more of the various roles one has tied to their identity. That's not worded the best, but I digress. Again I don't necessarily think it goes as far as shame for Blossom but it's certainly connected to guilt for her. Incidentally, the way to combat shame according to Brene Brown? Honest vulnerability, which fosters connection to others.

Blossom holds herself to a standard above everyone else, including her sisters, because she has inhabited the "leader" role since she was created. She takes a lot of pride in that role, and strives to live up to it, including with regards to shows of emotion. She is very concerned with appearances (I don't mean this in a judgy way) in the sense that she is always thinking about how others perceive her, how she can be a good role model, how she needs to have restraint and self control, how she "shouldn't" slip up or make mistakes because she's not human, she's "better". And this is a role and an identity she has held for so long that she doesn't really know who she is without Townsville to protect (see her specific anxiety about college visits and her future outside of Townsville).

So while it says that Bubbles and Blossom are closer in general because they shared more interests growing up, after Brick rejected her, I don't think she wanted anyone to see her crying. I don't think it was just Buttercup she didn't want seeing, but Bubbles happened to walk in while she was crying. She was trying to muffle her sobs with her pillow, was trying to calm down before anyone came up, but Bubbles found her when she couldn't deny that she was still actively trying to stifle her sobs. I think letting Bubbles comfort her was already a big step for Blossom in terms of emotional vulnerability, but it was made a little bit easier by the fact that it was Bubbles who isn't ashamed to cry and talks openly about her feelings.

When Buttercup saw her at school, she had already kind of calmed down from crying and was getting ready to go home. She was also at school, a setting where she is always "on" and doesn't allow herself to be vulnerable, so she was inclined to deny that something was really wrong - it was embarrassing to her. Buttercup coming into the room added more tension to an already raw situation in which Blossom's pride was hurt - both in terms of being rejected and in terms of being so emotional about it when she's supposed to be "mature". I think Buttercup wanted to spring into action, to know what was going on so she could try to fix or help in her own way, which resulted in her concern and then frustration, but Blossom was already making a big step telling Bubbles. I think the fact that Buttercup also sees crying as a sort of "weakness" affected Blossom's willingness to share with Buttercup. Blossom herself sees her control over her emotions as a virtue, so being so emotional also seems like a "weakness" to her. The last thing she wants on top of heartbreak is to come off weak, because as much as Buttercup and Bubbles are her sisters, she is their leader. Bubbles is closer to her and doesn't attach that meaning to emotion or crying, making it easier to show that vulnerability with her. There's also the fact that Blossom may have thought that as protective and impulsive as Buttercup is, she might've made a big deal out of it with Brick for hurting Blossom. And that would be yet another humiliation, albeit fully unintentional.

As for why they haven't addressed the elephant shoved in the back of the proverbial room, I think there's a couple reasons. In Bubbles' words, Buttercup lets things build up until they explode. It's hard to have a productive talk about deep seated, years old issues when everyone's emotions are already really heightened. And that seems to be the only time it comes up at least from Buttercup's end. Bubbles is by far the most emotionally intelligent and communicative one, but she doesn't like arguments or emotional conflicts so I don't think she's very inclined to bring things up that could start them if she can avoid it. We sort of see this with Will when she defuses his anger by calling herself a "bad girlfriend" and doesn't address a lot of the things that make her unhappy in their relationship until their breakup. Blossom seems to come from the perspective that if someone has an issue, they should bring it up in a mature way without becoming very emotional or defensive (or aggressive). That it is their responsibility and they only have themselves to blame if they don't (see her conversation with Bubbles after their first monster fight). And in general I do think that is a fairly decent communication policy - ppl can't read minds. But it's not a realistic way to improve Blossom and Buttercup's relationship specifically imo.

We don't really see Blossom asking Buttercup what's going on either, and we know that Buttercup isn't one to volunteer information about what's going on with her. Tho it's very possible that Blossom has tried to ask in the past but has given up after Buttercup rejected those attempts. I think Buttercup also tends to get more defensive with Blossom in apprehension of criticism. Blossom is more critical of her than Bubbles, which doesn't necessarily inspire her to confide in her if she was ever inclined to do so. In fact, most of their interactions throughout the fic involve competitiveness/rivalry, teasing, and/or scolding. Mostly scolding (if only cuz Buttercup doesn't care about cussing or behaving "properly" in more official settings).

Putting two kids/teens with a high aversion to vulnerability and opposite strategies of addressing issues in the same household tends to lead to conflict that doesn't get fully addressed/resolved without intervention. At least in my experience.

As a tangential addendum, I do find it really interesting that Blossom confided in Bubbles yet not the Professor, and that Buttercup confided in the Professor yet not her sisters. And I think that is also at least partly a function of the roles and reputations they take on. Blossom is the competent leader who is supposed to be ok. She doesn't want to worry the Professor. She might even feel like it might disappoint him for her to be so shaken over something "trivial" and a rowdyruff boy to boot (I don't think he would be but I digress). Buttercup also doesn't want the Professor to know about how Butch ripped her shirt off because he was tired and she didn't want to worry him, but that was a source of anger rather than sadness. In contrast, she was kind of in shock when she got back home after the breakup with Mitch and the initial rage. She only broke down after the Professor asked if she was ok and it kind of shook her out of her numbness. But I think there's also a sort of vulnerability she specifically allows with the Professor in private, though this is more of a headcanon. My only "evidence" for this is that scene in the show where he kisses each of the girls goodnight and Buttercup scowls until he kisses her on the head, eliciting an adorable but brief smile before scowling again. And in the first chapter he indulges her request to drop them off further down the block away from Mitch, and she kisses him on the cheek and says "I love you with all my heart", and idk I just think she has an especially soft spot in her heart for him. Like in the deep, secret recesses of her heart she's a covert Dad's girl?

#hopefully this is along the lines of what you wanted #bet you werent expecting a hidden lesson on shame resilience #sbj more than human meta #sbj more than human #blossom utonium #buttercup utonium #bubbles utonium #this sort of got away from me towards the end #long post

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cavennmalore · 3 months ago

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tagging @myfairkatiecat because it is only fair after you requested this word vomit lol

The thing about Keefe not being a good person is a little complicated. Full disclaimer, I don’t really believe in the whole good/bad person dichotomy, and definitely not for KIDS. Nevertheless, I don’t disagree with the people who say that Keefe isn’t the awesome person Sophie’s (biased) opinion makes him out to be. Not for the manipulative reasons -- which, Keefe is a teenage boy and I don't know about anyone else but that is like THE demographic for being a little messy in relationships lmao -- but for a lot of his planning. Joining the Neverseen without telling anyone what his plan was? Proposing himself as Mercadir without giving anyone a chance to refute him? Lying at the end of Legacy and showing up to the confrontation even though it was explicitly agreed he'd stay back? Basically, everything he did in Lodestar? Not great.

It's not Certified Good Guy Behavior. But that's his role. Keefe was literally designed to occupy this grey, questionable space, both in the narrative and outside of it. He's Sophie's character foil. Lady Gisela's plan revolves around pushing Keefe to become a worse and worse person; that involves raising him in a way that cultivates bad behavior and forcing him into increasingly extreme situations that are designed to make Keefe "ready" when the time comes. That is a huge part of the plots of Nightfall and Legacy.

Admittedly, I don't think Shannon has made him evil/grey enough, which I know isn't a popular take. There was real potential to make Keefe a wild card in Lodestar and make it so that the question isn't what stupid scheme is he planning? but to what extent have Lady Gisela's machinations worked? It's an interesting plotline to me. It's why I'm so excited for Unraveled; it's a chance to see this push-pull in action without Keefe's "north star" (AKA Sophie) guiding his decisions.

But a lot of people don't feel this way. A ton of the complaints I see around the book have to do with Keefe getting too much page time, the plotline taking up too much space in the story, etc. Which is fair! If you don't like Keefe, I'm sure a lot of this is grueling. However, a point I see connected to this line of thought is a wish for the books to return to a more ensemble vibe. That there should be more Dex, more Biana, more Stina, more Tam, etc. the way that it used to be.

That version of the books, though? It only really exists in the first book. Keefe is a prominent character in Exile and a huge driver of its plot. It's only in Book One where he only exists on the margins and isn't super involved. The ensemble cast has grown exponentially since then, to the point where there are frankly too many characters to keep track of in a scene without straight-up listing them all (which did happen but I'm forgetting which book). The decreased page time of supporting characters isn't solely because Keefe is eating the narrative, but because there are way too many characters for everyone to get a subplot; rather than have pre-existing characters solve issues, Shannon tends to just pull new ones in, and then leave them to hang out for the following books. If the series was for a more adult audience, I would say that it was time to start killing people off (like the popular critique of The Boys) but because this is a kids series, they're going to just hang around and not do much.

A lot of the nostalgia for this old version of KOTLC presents itself in fandom discussions of Dex. Full transparency: I didn't really like Dex that much in the early books when I did my reread. I found him unbearably rude to Fitz and Biana. His crush on Sophie felt invasive at times as if she was catering to a boy that was projecting his feelings and making her accommodate him. It's very similar stuff to the current criticism of Keefe! But I have yet to see any discussions around Dex that don't characterize him as kind, goofy, or sweet. Maybe there is some discussion of him being snarky or sarcastic. The most criticism I've seen of him is about how he treated Stina in his introduction, which was taken largely in isolation.

But that sweet, goofy version of Dex that people talk about missing? He doesn't exist. Sure, Dex mellowed out a ton in the later books, but he didn't become a whole new character. And I don't believe that he disappeared from the books in the way that some people claim. He just... doesn't have a subplot anymore. His crush on Sophie was resolved. It was a sticking point in his and Sophie's friendship which made him part of her character arc, and that arc is done. If that went on for any longer, it would be a drag on the pace of the series. Like I said before, the presence of so many side characters, each with their own needs and motivations, makes it difficult to introduce him into new stuff. It's why he gets so much more page time in Unlocked. With the presence of so many other characters, Shannon tends to handwave a lot of the background group dynamics. Dex ended up becoming close to Keefe and was able to shine there, away from Sophie's perspective and their finished arc.

All of this is to say, it's not wrong to dislike Keefe or like Dex. But I think a lot of the conversations surrounding these guys can get muddled in nostalgia and what people think the books should be rather than what they are. I'm (severely) guilty of it too. It's part of a broader trend in fandoms as "fandom" as a concept becomes more popular. That is a whole other post, though, and frankly, this one is long enough lol

#i did not realize i had this much to say #idk what it is about me but once the laptop gets broken out its essay time #this genuinely isn't directed at anyone and is not meant to be hostile or mean #and i would love it if people who disagreed with me share why that is #bc at the end of the day this is just my opinion and despite how hard i tried i am not an English major lol #i hope that you enjoyed this monster of a post tho katie lol #if anything i might take some of those hate anons off your hands for a little bit lmao #kotlc #keefe sencen #dex dizznee

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generalluxun · 5 months ago

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Apropos of nothing, do you remember that idea we discussed where Adrien & Chloe swap parents but keep the same default coping mechanisms/temperaments?

So Adrien spends a lo of time day dreaming & basically lives near full time in a sort of Chat Noir-esc persona minus the hero elements & tends to try and draw others into it.

Meanwhile for Chloe everything is a fight, all the time, but there's also no real victory, its an endless staircase where meeting wining is just the new standard for 'acceptable'.

Let me wondering what dynamics would have emerged in such an AU.

Like,

Adrien is probably more popular than Chloe ever was, but also likely even easier to manipulate or use. With Chloe in canon its mostly directing her anger that is nominally easy, while here it'd be simple to get Adrien to buy stuff for people or give out tickets ETC.

I imagine the 'issue' is that he's not much for social boundaries or restraint so he can become clingy very quickly and get very upset if he feels rejected.

Chloe meanwhile may only be going to school to get away from her father or even as a pride thing, "People will think I only succeed because you pay people" or cos Adrien was going through a rough patch maybe. Probably a combo.

I think her default temperament would be closer to Gabriel or Kagami's. She's colder and more urbane than canon, but still very blunt at best. Still she reserves hostility for competition, where its let out as nearly unchecked but very targeted aggression. She's not as disliked due to not picking a fight with everything that moves & being a bit more restrained, but she basically viewed as an ice queen.

In this regard, Adrien is probably the only person off the cuff to be able to be particularly affectionate or playful with Chloe. Cos he's been around long enough that he kind of exists outside her normal perspective. Similarly, Chloe can be rougher around the edges with Adrien than most others & he doesn't take it badly as he knows she's never leaving him.

I am unsure where Sabrina or Marinette would end up in this scenario, maybe they are friends?

Without having to deal with Chloe's bulldozer personality for several years Marinette may be more confident. Not a Queen Bee exactly, but definitely the go to girl. How well said confidence holds up to a challenge however is unclear.

Sabrina likely is still rather neurotic about needing to feel useful to others given that attitude stems from Roger. So she might volunteer a to in class, and be another "Easy to take advantage of" person.

Kagami, her & Chloe's relationship would be interesting I feel cos it'd bemore overtly a rivarly. But I think regarded very differently by both.

To Chloe, Kagami is a peer, a foe, someone to overcome; someone who can nd has defeated her and she hates it, even if part of her is drawn towards her regardless.

For Kagami she'd start of being like, "Ooh marvelous competition, such an aggressive dueling style!" only to realize Chloe takes 'ZERO' pleasure in this, or almost anything she does. So for her part of it would almost be wanted to crack the shell, or dethaw the ice queen.

Beyond that... Yeah no clue, though I imagine Chloe & Gabriel are on less good terms than Adrien & Gabriel were, but also more subtly.

Like, Adrien was more open expressing frustration or resentment with his father, but still wanted his love and hoped he'd warm up. Meanwhile I feel for Chloe it'd have become so tense and toxic at least since Emilie died that while she wants tp prove herself to him, its another challenge, a contest, a battle of wills to her. here's no real hope for love or warmth, she just wants to win.

ALso realize why I thought of this, low key imagining her having an Akuma with somehting like this happening: https://youtu.be/tWTQyCrq0Ts?si=R5_KSbqtZGd4ok5w&t=290

Start at 4:50 if interested.

We have different ideas of this! So I'll lay mine out.

Adrien: I think you're still clinging to the 'good boy Adrien' of canon and warping what we're doing here to fit that. Adrien i not evil, but he is not *socially functional* here. He is not transaction based, he is escapism personified. Might he be nice to talk to? Yes. But ay any given moment he might tangent off into a lore dump of one of the (many) worlds he's made up entirely in his head. Not only that, he might just start larping it at you without warning and without any indication even *he* is aware he's crossed the boundary.

Think 'ahaha I have ADHD so bad watch my hyperfixate!' only not in the quirky tumblresque manner but in the actual social impairment manner. He's not anti-social he's A-social, and there is a small chance if his 'reality' is challenged he MIGHT get aggressive. Most people can humor hi, and his manner can be fun for a while, but it can also be extremely draining. Only a few people can handle it 'full time'.

Chloé: I think you're adding canon spice here again, keeping the ire-antagonist angle. I see it much more as competition for the sake of the *competition*. She needs another award. Being an 'ice queen' is wasted effort. Being mean would indicate a level of attention to people that most are just not worth.

The difference can be highlighted with Kagami for example- Kagami might seek a rivalry(she enjoys them. There's a form of connection and socialization in acknowledging a peer and beating/losing to them specifically) Chloe just couldn't care less. You're an opponent for the length of a match, then the match is over and there's another, and another, until a trophy is won or lost and then it's on to the next competition. There's no reviewing; no bitterness nor pride. As soon as the trophy is won or lost it's worthless as is everything involved in winning it. It's not a snide or dismissive attitude(again, that would take effort) it's just a sort of detched/focused 'Next Quest!' mentality. She is the 'questing knight'.

I don't think Chloe would make connections with most people(for obvious weapons) and could definitely make a terrible first impression. However those who knows her (from a distance obvi) would often have a 'stand back and check this out' mentality. She's not great to talk to but just *seeing what she'll do next* is entertaining, success or failure.

now Sabrina and Marinette

Sabrina: If we're keeping her as knowing and being devoted to Chloe via family ties, then she would be 'Squire' to Chloé's knight. Constantly there with a spare foil, a new pencil, or a towel. She's a one-girl cheering section who takes more pride in Chloé's achievements than Chloé does herself(though she never touts them when Chloe is around, since Chloé takes a negative view on all past victories as 'meaningless') If you want Chloe to focus on you, just pick on Sabrina. You'll feel her eyes boring a hole in you before she tackles you, if you're lucky. If Sabrina is instead attached to Adrien through connections then she'll be his playmate and partner in all his fantasies. She's an 'Adrien Whisperer' who remembers each of his worlds and all the little details for ease of translation. She enjoys her status as the one constant in his worlds, and guards it a little jealously. She's good for his peace of mind, but probably bad for any sense of healthy socialization for him, as she would view any effort to 'bring him into the real world' as bad.

Marinette: In regards to Chloé, Marinette would definitely have some oppositional issues. Marinette likes competition and winning, but she likes it from the social aspect. Rivalry is fun(as long as it's light, Kagami can be a bit intense for her) but all her attempts to engage Chloé slide right off. 'I'll get you next time!' elicits a shrug at best. 'Ha I beat you!' elicits even less. Similarly attempts to ingratiate fall flat. Gifts are unwelcome, praise earns eyerolls. Marinette is stubborn though, so her long term goal would be to figure out this being who is so antithetical to herself. She'll find a way to *matter* to Chloe some how. The worst thing for asomeone with only child syndrome is being ignored. 🤣 With Adrien Marinette would be both enamored and repulsed. It would create quite the internal struggle for her. He's Gorgeous, and he's oh so creative! She loves his little head-worlds and could listen to him talk about them forever. *BUT* when he acts them out, when he brings the imaginations into reality. She gets intense second-hand embarrassment. She projects her own insecurity at being seen as immature onto him and it eats at her. So their relationship becomes a push-pull of: does she pull him out of his fantasy worlds? Does she learn to set aside her embarrassment? Do they meet somewhere in the middle? Does the attraction overcome the hurdles? (Is Sabrina an obstacle?) How does she know if Adrien is attracted to her, or the her in his head? Who is the her in his head? With him having such a vivid imagination she might feel very exposed around him. He *thinks* about her, and she can't hide in his head.

I hope some of this long winded explanation helped.

#ask #miraculous au #Parent Swap #coping mechanisms remain #I know the coping remaining isn't realistic but those were the ground rules #chloe bourgeois #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #sabrina raincomprix

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sarah-yyy · 1 year ago

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Sorry to bother you, is My journey worth watching?

what: period cdrama // completed // 24 eps, roughly 50 mins each where: iqiyi (i think most eps are still vip-locked) (standard disclaimer that i don't use eng subs so i don't speak to the quality of the subs) why: ngl, i was in it purely for zhang linghe to start, but then got !!! over cheng lei and lu yuxiao, and was too invested to quit even when the plot got sloppy. extremely gorgeous cast, extremely gorgeous set. the cinematography?? chef's kiss. you can see the budget for this show was good. the relationship between the characters? v interesting.

story revolves around the Gong family who is v prominent in jianghu even though they live up in the mountains and keep themselves sequestered away from the rest of jianghu. the Gong family itself is split into 4 different factions: Shang, Jue, Zhi, Yu.

Yu 羽 - the Yu household deals with internal affairs. the head of the Yu household is the head of the Gong family (the title is Sword Wielder or zhiren)

this is our male lead, gong ziyu (a baby). second son of the Yu household. his dad is the zhiren and his big bro (gong huanyu) is the named heir who will inherit the zhiren position. has a v lukewarm relationship with his dad. introduced as being quite useless. his martial arts is :/ and he sees no need to improve his skills etc because his brother will be there to protect him.

is quite suddenly thrust into the position of zhiren when his dad and his brother die under ~mysterious circumstances :(

Jue 角 - the Jue household deals with...external affairs, they are the ones who leave the mountain to Get Things Done outside and manage all relationships/partnerships outside

gege step on me this boy is gong shangjue, head of the jue household. he is The Man. the pride and joy of the gong family. everyone (*cough*i say everyone but really yuanzhi-didi does it enough that he counts for everyone*cough*) worships him. martial arts skills?? loyalty to the gong family?? incredibly attractive resting bitch face??? he is a 10 no matter how you assess him.

missed out on being the zhiren by virtue of him not being home when tragedy struck the old zhiren and gong ziyu's brother. doesn't think gong ziyu has what it takes to be zhiren and take care of the Gong family. my boy gong shangjue would make an Excellent zhiren tbh

do i have to seduce y'all into watching this i think i have to:

Shang 商 - the Shang household develops/produces weaponry

for most of it, the show has a p dark vibe, BUT whenever gong zishang shows up, we know we're in for some laughs. this zishang-jiejie is the eldest daughter of the head of the Shang household.

her father doesn't take her v seriously because she's a girl (also because she's always following behind gong ziyu's personal bodyguard jin fan like this: 😍💖🤞🏼; valid life choices tbh because same) but she does take her craft v seriously! ride or die for gong ziyu.

Zhi 徵 - the Zhi household develops poisons

YUANZHI-DIDI!! this boy loves two things: poisons and gege. #1 gong shangjue fanboy at least 10 years in a row. parents died when he was p young, and gong shangjue took him under his wing. whiz at poisons and v fight fight fight (ง •̀_•́)ง. is suspicious about everything and VERY protective of his gege.

alright that's the main Gong sibs all sorted. there's also an assortment of Inner Mountain (houshan) characters that are v interesting but i won't get into because 1) spoilers, 2) this post will get too long if i get to talk about hua-gongzi and xue-gongzi/xue-tongzi.

okay so the Gong family live in p much a fortress up in the mountains. no outsiders are allowed in, and only a select few are allowed out of the Gong family territory at all. we learn that this is to protect the Gong family from Wu Feng, a spy organisation which has p much taken over jianghu. Wu Feng learns that the Gong family will be holding a bride selection contest thingy for gong huanyu, and sends:

yun weishan, a low-ranking assassin in Wu Feng (Chi, the lowest out of 4 ranks chi, mei, wang, liang), disguised as a bride.

her mission is to be picked by gong huanyu as his bride, and become the next zhiren-furen so she can p much feed intel to Wu Feng. when gong huanyu and the old zhiren both croak, her attentions turn to gong ziyu who is by that point already 😍🥰😘 over her anyway NO SURPRISES. the 恋爱脑 on that boy istg, absolutely head no thoughts only yun weishan at least 20 hours in a day.

shangguan qian, a higher-ranking assassin (Mei, one rank above yws) in Wu Feng

my love my wife her mission is a little different from yws. her target isn't anyone from the Yu household but gong shangjue instead. the goal is to get her hands on this secret weapon (this is also a v HMMM part of the plot but no matter we endure what we have to) that the Gong family is safeguarding.

the relationship between these two wu feng spies is so interesting too!! they're not friends, not exactly allies, but also not quite enemies. they will help each other out if they really have to (and only if it doesn't jeopardise their own positions and there is adequate compensation), but will also not hesitate to stab each other in the backs if it serves their respective missions.

i needed like 100000 more scenes of them together ngl

ANYWAY the plot revolves around the Gong family trying to Catch The Spy, the Wu Feng spies trying to Complete Their Mission, gong ziyu trying to Prove Himself as the zhiren, and ofc there's romance sprinkled around. that's p much the gist of the show.

listen listen listen... i know this show has a bad rep in the cdrama circles, i agree. the plot is......HMM and it tries to hard to be one of those clever mysteries when it should just be what it is which is p much an idol drama?? i mean...it is a guo jingming show, we weren't going in expecting to be wowed by the plot. i think if they'd just stuck to the basics, this would have been a stronger show, but imo this wasn't bad bad. the worldbuilding was good and the characters were interesting, and like i said, the whole thing is shot really beautifully!!

the ending was......but i'll keep this spoiler free and just say that it was HMMMMM and v unnecessary what they did.

with the preface that i watched it without much expectations as to the plot, i enjoyed a lot of parts of the show! it's an incredibly easy watch, and because it's only 24 eps, the pacing is quick and conflicts don't tend to drag on for too long. if you're looking for some easy entertainment, i'd say go for it, but if you have Standards regarding plot etc, this is probably not the show for you

#tv rec #my journey to you #cdrama

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the-overanalyzer · 13 days ago

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Got another one for you. Ok so you're very old and know you have to retire in a few years, five years tops. You've finally climbed up the ladder at DC and are offered to have complete authority over any one character for the rest of your career. What you say goes. You get to define how that character can be used in other books too. BUT you know that for any beloved other characters you bring in for teamups or as supporting cast, you won't be able to make any significant changes or improvements to their characterization, stories, etc without their writers or editors calling foul. You'll never get to switch to a different project. Which character do you choose to write for?

...you're going right for the throat, I see.

The easiest answer would be to pick someone obscure, who doesn't have much a of a supporting cast of their own. One of the alien Green Lanterns maybe. But that's really simple, and therefore no fun, is it? So...

In thirty years, Cassie Sandsmark has never had an ongoing solo title to call her own, and if I've got carte blanche to right one wrong in this unjust and uncaring world, it's goddamn gonna be this one.

She has so much potential to carry a series! She's a powerhouse, she's a leader, she's even a bit of a detective. Her relation to the gods offers any number of dramatic possibilities, and she's got well-established ties to almost every major Earth-based superhero family. She's got a juicy set of character flaws (overconfidence, short temper, just a touch self-centered, all the classic Greek Hero shortcomings). She can absolutely carry a title, and it drives me insane that the most she's ever gotten to headline is a Countdown tie-in miniseries of all things (god, it always comes back to Countdown in the end, doesn't it?)

First order of business: A new name. I'm fond of "Olympiad" myself. If DC gave half a crap about their third-gen legacy characters, she'd have stopped being Wonder Girl when Yara showed up and they insisted on calling her that. Wonder Woman writers have only very inconsistently wanted to use her in a sidekick role since Byrne left anyway, might as well formally graduate her out and free the slot up for the next poor underutilized soul.

Secondly: Establish a niche. Cassie can do the same superhero stuff Diana can, but Diana's role in the DCU is too much that of the outsider for born-and-raised American Cassie to really emulate, and she's not really a diplomat regardless. I'm not sure exactly what that would look like, but you could easily lean into that Greek Hero archetype and make her, more or less, a DnD-style Professional Adventurer.

Third: Love interest! By which I mean "CissieCassie is now canon, and oh boy is it a trainwreck". At this point in their lives, there's absolutely no way it would go well, and I fully intend to play that for all it's worth. There's a slight chance the Green Arrow office might be using Cissie at the time, but frankly, any Green Arrow creative team worth their salt would be down for some messy dyke drama, we'll work something out.

As far as secondary cast goes, Cassie's only real consistent supporting character is her mother. Her relationships with her closest friends (i.e. the rest of YJ) are all well defined, and it's not like they need development in her book. There are some more obscure Wonderfam characters you can use that are unlikely to cause conflicts with other writers. Ares has quite a few kids running around that could offer up some interesting dynamics. I'd love to bring back Lyta Milton, or maybe one of the creepy little crow boys from Gail Simone's run. She's got the Steph problem of not many villains specific to her, but there's a deep well of mythological monsters to draw from both directly and as inspiration (the Percy Jackson method, if you will).

So yeah. That's my dictatorial agenda. Justice for Cassie 2k-for-fucking-ever.

#so i married an ask murderer #razielim #cassie sandsmark #wonder girl

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scheodingers-muppet · 2 months ago

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TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT (Stranger Things Version)

i have no clue why it took me this long, sorry guys

Fortnight: Jopper. “I was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me” “What about your quiet treason?” Joyce dating Bob. The references to spouses, “turned good neighbors”

Tortured Poets Department: Jancy. First part is from Jon’s pov. “you left your typewriter at my apartment” is such a Nancy line. “you’re in self-sabotage mode…but i’ve seen this episode and still love the show” Nancy self-sabotages a good bit, like with Steve or by fighting with Jonathan, etc. Second verse is Nancy. “You smoked than ate seven bars of chocolate” “I’ve read this one, where you come undone. I chose this cyclone with you” Both of them have seen each other at *lows,* spiraling and just doing bad, but they stick together and love each other

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys: Mileven. Mike and his Wheeler Self Destruct Button (ie closing himself off) “he saw forever so he smashed it up” forever not even as like, them being together forever but even the fear that she’s always going to be connected to the upside down. “once i fix me, he’s gonna miss me” reminds me of El and Max at the mall

Down Bad: El. “just to do experiments on” “everything comes out teenage petulance” she is soooo teen girl. this one is mostly vibes, honestly

So Long, London: Mileven, from El's POV. "I saw in my mind fairy lights through the mist" "Pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away" "Wet through my clothes, weary bones caught the chill" "I didn't opt in to be your odd man out" El being excluded in season 3. "How much sad did you think I had in me? How much tragedy?" "You swore that you loved me but where were the clues?"

But Daddy I Love Him: Steddie. The imagery of people seeing the singer (Steve) as socially above the love interest due to him being "crazy" and "chaotic." The town being against him, like in season 4. "I'll tell you something about my good name. It's mine alone to disgrace"

Fresh Out The Slammer: Jancy. "Fresh out the slammer, I know who my first call will be to" "Splintered back in winter," (Fall but) "Silent dinners" and Nancy breaking down over Barb in season 2, which is part of what led to her and Steve splitting up. "He didn't understand me" but Jonathan did

Florida!!!: the Bylers leaving Hawkins. “Little did you know your homes really only a town you’re just a guest in” Will and Jon were never really accepted, outside of a few people. “You pack you’re life away just to wait out the shitstorm back in Texas” Hawkins in this case, and Flordia would be California

Guilty As Sin?: beginning of Jancy, from Nancy’s pov. “this cage was once just fine” her relationship with Steve. the whole song is about wanting someone else while in a relationship.

Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me?: El. “my bare hands paved their path” “crash the party like a record scratch” “i was tame, i was gentle til the circus life made me mean” the circus life being the rainbow room. “they say they didn’t do it to hurt me, but what if they did?” “you wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum where they raised me” “I am what I am cause you trained me”

I Can Fix Him: Steddie, from Steve’s pov. "They shake their heads saying 'God help *her*'" the entire town hates Eddie. "His hand, so calloused from his pistol, softly traces hearts on my face" Eddie's hands would be literally calloused, from the guitar, but also it's a good metaphor for him having to be tough due to his circumstances, yet still being soft and gentle with the person he loves.

loml: Jopper, from Joyce's pov before they had Hopper back. "Who's going to stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames?" "Thought I better safe than starry-eyed" "I wish I could un-recall how we almost had it all" "Should've let it stay buried" "you're the loss of my life"

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart: Nancy and El. "I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit" El has the more breakup-oriented side of things, but Nancy's broken heart stems from losing Barb. The second verse hits for that. "I keep finding *his* things in drawers, crucial evidence I didn't imagine the whole thing" "all the pieces of me shattered while the crowds were chanting 'more!'" works for both.

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived: Max about Billy. Hear me out. "You tried to buy some pills from a friend of friends of mine" if Billy was still alive i just KNOW he would try to buy from Eddie. "I just want to know if rusting my sparking summer was your goal" Billy was awful to Max. "Were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?" "In 50 years will all this be declassified, and you'll confess why you did it" "You deserve prison but you won't get time" "You are what you did. I'll forget you but I'll never forgive" I think it's safe to say Max has very complex emotions about Billy, still loving him for what he could have been, but still being really hurt and effected but his actions that cause a weird grief that I think this song conveys rather well

The Alchemy: Lumax, from Max's pov. This is gonna get kinda cheesy, stick with me. "The hospital was a drag, worst sleep I ever had" "Haven't come around in so long, but I'm coming back so strong" Max has been distant with Lucas but we finally see her starting to warm back up before Vecna gets her. The sports metaphors also fit. Wrong sport, obviously but ya know. "The sign on your heart says it's still reserved for me"

Clara Bow: Nancy and Karen. I think Karen was once a lot like Nancy. (i have not seen anything about the musical so I have no clue if that's canon but) and I think she sees a lot of herself in Nancy. The constant comparison to the women that came before you and you being the next great thing. Knowing someone will come after you, too. "Only when your girlish glow flickers just so do they let you know it's hell on earth to be heavenly"

The Black Dog: Byler, from Will's pov. "I move through the world with my heartbroken. My longings stay unspoken" "You said I needed a brave man then proceeded to play him until I believed it too" Mike was the one who spearheaded saving Will, even when he was scared. "Remember how my rain-soaked body was shaking"

imgonnagetyouback: Steddie. Why? I decided. The tension of "I hate you but I want you" and not being able to decide which one is stronger is so them

The Albatross: El. "She's the albatross, she is here to destroy you" "Locked me up in towers but I'd visit in your dreams" "I'm the albatross, I swept in at the rescue"

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus: The Byers about Mike. "Hands in the hair of somebody in darkness...and I just watched it happen" Will about Mike, watching him get with El. "If you want to break my cold, cold heart, just say 'I love you the way that you were'" Mike confessing to Will would rock his world, and vice versa, but they've both been changed so much. "You said some things that I can't unabsorb" the “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls” “too impaired by my youth to know what to do”

How Did It End?: joyce after hopper “died.” “lost the game of chance, what are the chances?” “guess who we ran into at the shops, walking in circles like she was lost” “my beloved ghost and me”

So High School: it could be stancy, but i like it being jopper. a lot of it can be applied to any of the couples during their good moments, but i think since joyce and hopper are *out* of high school and actually look back on their flirting in high school as nostalgic, it adds to it

I Hate It Here: karen. HEAR ME OUT. i think karen used to be *just* like nancy, with big dreams and ambition, used to be dedicated to her grades while still having a good social life, etc. and i think she misses that. “tell me something awful, like you’re a poet trapped inside the body of a finance guy” about ted, who used to be romantic when they were teens. “i was a debutant in another life but now i seem too scared to go outside” “no mid-sized city hopes” “only the gentle survived; i dreamt about it in the dark the night i felt like i would die”

thanK you aIMee: either el about the rainbow room or eddie about jason if he didn’t die and made it big

I Look in People’s Windows: jonathan. there’s the obvious joke, but genuinely. we don’t necessarily see him look for someone in specific, but i imagine this is how he felt after his dad left

The Prophecy: steve. both in terms of him finding love and breaking out of the jerk-popular-guy role/getting the upside down closed forever. mainly in the bridge for the latter.

Cassandra: el and joyce. verse one is season one joyce. “that’s where i was when i got the call” with will going missing. “when the truth comes out it’s quiet” the imagery of not being believed and being treated bad by the town. second verse is el, about the rainbow room. “in my tower weaving nightmares, twisting my smiles into snarls” “what doesn’t kill you makes aware but what happens when it becomes who you are?” bridge is both. “bloods thick but nothing like a payroll. bet they never spared a prayer for my soul” about the people working the rainbow room and the government keeping everything quiet.

Peter: byler, from wills perspective. “in closets like cedar preserved from when we were just kids. was it something i did?” “promises, ocean deep but never to keep” “a natural scene stealer” “life was always easier on you than it was on me” the BRIDGE

The Bolter: robin. i can’t really explain why but it is

Robin: nancy about holly

The Manuscript: joyce. once again, can’t fully explain it. but it is.

#stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #mike wheeler #steddie #taylor swift #the tortured poets department

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stromuprisahat · 8 months ago

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i saw your evgeniy post and i totally agree that it wouldnt work out the same at all if genya was male, maybe he would work directly for the king but either way im willing to bet the fandom wouldnt be victimising him to that extent and the character probably would be allowed to stay morally grey instead of being forced to be "good".

as per your comments too: they probably gave ivan a love interest for "representation points" but if the show character was played more accurately to the book and looked more like book ivan people would probably ship him with the darkling a lot more and talk about him having unrequited love or whatever which is fine but certainly cheapens the characters motives.

also i dont think alina would have got on with genya if she was in a red kefta from the start as its like she saw genya in livery as "on the same level as her" as a servant and outsider, its my firm belief that if genya was introduced to alina as corporalki to start with her prejudice would kick in and she wouldnt trust her at all as she seems more prejudice against corporalki than any of the other orders (aside from the darkling)

(What if Genya were Evgeniy)

I don't think the King would require services of Tailor. The Queen remains the obvious choice for that, although there would be issues.

Regarding narrative-treatment... well, my guess is he wouldn't live long. Just look at Ivan- he wasn't easily brainwashed character, so he had to die to prop up brand new Good Guy™. Zhenya wouldn't be re-written into one-dimensional victim, because it would be easier to simply kill him off (preferably in a way emphasizing he picked the wrong side).

Fandom would simply ignore him, because he's a man in Aleksander's service. His backstory, missing sexual abuse "orchestrated" by the Darkling would also lose its appeal to antis. Loss of loved ones or torture just doesn't have the ring to it, when aimed at a man. Hell, if we'd make the King "fond" of teen boys, or came up with another molester, Evgeniy's story would include different variables. Women are easier to woobify, but then again, it could be "fixed" by making the boy gay, or better- headcanon gay. Everyone knows that makes you easier to exploit, so we can pretend lack of agency equals unfavourable circumstances etc. etc.

Since we know almost nothing about book!Ivan's personal life, I didn't mind his and Fedyor's romantic relationship, quite contrary- both actors used their minimal screentime to introduce the best romance in season 1 (in both, if I'm honest).

Ivan's in danger of simplification of his motivations no matter the looks. While book Ivan's described as good-looking, in show he's already canonically MLM. Both can work as a good enough reason to turn his loyalty into unrequired crush. Why delve into anything more complicated, if your view requires demonisation of the Darkling?

Absolutely agree on Genya's position and Alina's "friendship". Alina has been distrustful of other Grisha since the beginning. Sure, her belief she's a fraud played a part, but that would apply to Genya in red too. Grisha without colour didn't fit in. Useless Sun Summoner wouldn't either, once her incompetence becomes widely-known. Alina doesn't exactly believe in selfless unconditional friendship. Hell, she takes and takes from Genya, while offering little, with Malyen she assumes the opposite position.

#reply #Grishaverse #grishanalyticritical #Genya Safin #Ivan Kaminsky #Alina Starkov #What if/AU/...#The Darkling #Heartrender Husbands #self centred and paranoid #antis #anti Malina

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ficnoire2 · 1 year ago

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An Ode to The King, Briana Irene Matthews

When I say I love this character, I say it with my whole chest. I cannot begin to express the joy I experienced when one of my fellow educators passed me this book and said “I’ve got a fantasy book for you, and there is a black girl on the cover.” I am a child of The Neverending Story, Legend, Willow, etc (Google if you need to) and brown faces were few and far between, if there at all. There are so many things I admire and appreciate about Bree Bree and the power she holds can’t be understated.

*Spoilers Ahead so Exit Stage Left if You Need To*

Choices

In a story where choice has been hijacked for so many of our faves, I love the choice she makes at the end of Bloodmarked. To choose herself. I know there has been controversy regarding this but fuck all that, she said what she said. The fact that black girls need to be perfect and make decisions that are equally as perfect no matter what they are up against is absurd. That line of thinking has real world consequences. I love that she tried to consult with elders, those that came before her. She seemed to be following this implied protocol that did not bear the fruit she’d hoped for.

When she says, “I realize now why Jessie’s mantra to call root didn’t work for me.” She said, “Think of the power you possess and the woman who gave it to you.” I smile sadly, “I used to think that woman was my mother, and through her, you. Tried it her way and it didn’t work. Because you all didn’t give me my power.” I kneel to face the streams, thrust my hands into the earth from which they came.

“I did.”

This was a hell of a scene because she is finally shutting off the noise of the outside world, the distracting chatter blocking her self actualization. Arthur, the ancestors, the Legendborn, and choosing Bree. Much like she puts the broken pieces of Excalibur back together, she is in a sense doing the same for herself (pain welded blade). It even bears a deep purple stone in the pommel. The color meant to speak to this pain, this literal and figurative bruising and beating she has taken. In addition, the choice to go with Erebus and the uncertainty that hangs there was pure fearlessness. As her character sheet says, she is intrepid, bold. The way she is written, you just know it is in her soul. As Tracy says in her dedication, For every Black girl who was “the first.” Black is capitalized here, emphasized, because we are often demonized for making decisions or having experiences that those that came before may not have had the courage or opportunity to step into. The First. In Bree’s line everyone ran and she decided to stop running and turn to face the unknown, whatever may come with her chin up.

In addition to being a clever badass, I loved watching how she navigated her relationships with Nick and Sel. Again, another hot button topic where folks are clutching pearls and clenching ass cheeks. I am not interested in “ship wars” but what did catch my eye was the way Bree allowed herself to be loved on. The safety and soft intimacy she received and craved from Nick in a time where her world had been completely shattered was beautiful to read. “I’m impressed, despite my still racing heartbeat. How does he do it? How does this boy navigate my emotions like a seasoned sailor, finding the clear skies and bringing them closer, when all I seem able to do is hold fast to the storms?” He is patient with her. The way he speaks, comforting and protective. I love that she had this! The giddiness at that age of meeting someone that makes you dizzy in the best way. I love that Bree allowed herself to experience the respite Nick offered. That relationship represents the light in her, hearkens back to a simpler time.

I also think Bree enjoys the challenge Sel presents. Aside from him trying to kill her in the beginning (and being an all around asshole), she always seems to find interest in him (her shadow side). “He’s dressed in black, as always, but his long coat is gone. His tattoos are on full display below sleeves rolled at the elbow. They wind down his forearms and wrists, and I can’t help but study them. I wonder how far they go and how many he has before I remember that I detest him and shouldn’t care about his tattoos at all.”

Bree is fiery (quite literally) and finds herself drawn to the darkness and mystery of Sel. In truth, she likes to stir the pot. When Vaughn is giving her shit about being Nick’s page, she intentionally fucks with him. “But I’m not going to disappear. And I don’t want to keep my head down. Instead, I’m going to give Vaughn a glimpse of who I really am, and show him exactly who I’m not.”

She then throws the haymaker, “You’re a bigot and a bully, Scheafer. You insult me because you think you know what I am capable of, but you don’t. I must make you nervous, though, for you to expose your insecurities about your odds of success in the tournament.”

Long story short, Briana Irene is with the shits! How many times have you had to check in a loser such as Vaughn, who in all their mediocrity, thinks they are superior? I love that she essentially says, “aight then.”

I say all that to say that I like that she is feeling her feelings. She can acknowledge and accept the safety and easiness of Nick, while also reveling in the mystery and chaos of Sel. Those two desires can (and do) live in the same body. I love that this is confusing for her and she grapples with it because, what 16 year old wouldn’t! Low key/high key, folks my age would grapple with certain aspects of that but again, her choices.

Bree is supposed to be complicated. At times infuriating. I find it strange however, when folks don’t give her the space she has earned to develop. So many of us Black girls are not afforded this space. No room to grow, change our minds, or choose a different path. She is grappling with grief and grief is messy, complicated. The vessel in which she entered the world ceases to exist on the plane of the living and she is floating in the darkness and uncertainty of that. “Your anguish is wrapped around your very heart.” Not to mention navigating racism, sexism, supernatural beings, and understanding her own body and power. That is a tall order. She represents multitudes of girls who were “the first” and I am so glad I get to witness her in all her flaws and greatness. THE KING. Rumble black girl, rumble.

#tracey deonn #legendborn #legendborn cycle #bree mathews #bloodmarked

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