#what an absolute banger of an episode

[ash-tree-eyes]

On this week’s episode of the magnus protocol: Rich Grandma With Shotgun Makes People Hunt Each Other For Sport!

[iizuumi]

me next please

[asterjennifer]

I'm not gay I have a boyfriend I'm not gay I have a boyfriend I'm not gay I have a boyfriend I'm not gay I hav—

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

most nights kinda suck. but sometimes youre relaxing in a nice motel and one of the tv channels is playing 9-1-1 episodes <3 and everything feels like it'll be okay for a few hours <3

[soupdreamer]

and all if we have is tonight i have a bag of coke in my jacket and i've got poppers in mine

[dennisboobs]

do you guys ever sit and remember that dennis takes a mental health day is an episode that exists

[octopus-defence-squad]

someone save me

[lumiilys]

Continuing my ofmd rewatch and I’m on red flags now and I keep wanting to pause every 5 seconds and take screenshots!!! OUGH RED FLAGS MY BELOVED!!!!

[ziracona]

“How could you do this to me?”

“Me? You did this to yourself.”

“It was just business!”

“Wow. You call sleeping with me ‘business’? …I hate to think what that makes you.”

*8,000 airhorns*

[performing-personhood]

Like yeah okay well all fairy tales are sort of cringe, kind of an integral part of the magic, are you new here babes cuz it seems like this your first time in the greater sci-fi genre

"that musical segment in the 2023 Doctor Who christmas special was cringe" news flash asshole, all of Doctor Who is cringe, shut up and enjoy the stupid fuckin gay cartoon

[luxicorde]

Guess who finally finished castlevania anime

[botslayer9000]

imagine if the us army commissioned linked horizon to write a propaganda song for them. wouldn’t that be fucked up

[gffa]

I will say that I loved the Qimir reveal, that it didn't need to be a big surprise twist, it just needed to have momentum built up to it and for it to be a banger moment, and Manny Jacinto absolutely achieved that. The way he switched between affectations, that chirpy little 'hello!' when Mae stumbled into the clearing, the way his face and eyes and voice would go almost dreamy when he wasn't hiding what he was anymore, the goofy little head tilts at a contrast with the genuinely menacing aura coming off him, the real danger he posed, all of it was exactly as satisfying as I could have asked for. It was in that moment of, "You really didn't know it was me? Not even deep down?" that said everything. It was never meant to be a huge twist surprise, the audience was supposed to know it, that maybe you might doubt it because your suspicions were also elsewhere, but you at least were supposed to suspect it. That reveal wasn't meant to be shocking because it was a surprise. That reveal was meant to be shocking because Manny Jacinto acted his ass off to portray the switching between affected personalities of his character and to be menacing once you saw his real face, to have absolutely incredible arms, to prowl around that jungle set like a panther who has no conscience, no human vulnerability, no heart to reach out to. It was meant to be shocking because it was an awesome lightsaber fight. The reveal of Qimir as the Sith was the best part of the episode because I was genuinely excited for what I knew was coming, I was on the edge of my seat to see his actual face, even though I already knew, I wanted that actual moment, I wanted to see how it would play out, and this show is at its best when it gives its actors the platform to actually do their job, and Manny Jacinto knocked it out of the park for me.

[flannelepicurean]

Okay, so... I ran the dollar amounts through an inflation calculator, and...Now I am picturing an American farmer, played by Ricky from Trailer Park Boys, just...appearing in some eatery in the fanciest track suit he could buy and being like, "Gimme seven hundred bucks' worth of ham and eggs, and make it snappy."

And them being like, "...wut."

And he's like, "I HAVEN'T GOT ALL DAY, OKAY? I GOT SHIT TO DO. My old man gave me thirty-five grand and I'm the master of my own fuckin' dentistry, so get me seven hundred bucks' worth of ham and eggs and then fuck off."

And the manager is like, "Sir, this is a Denny's," and then catches a ketchup bottle upside the dome while our farmer hollers, "WELL, GO GET FUCKIN' DENNY, THEN, AND TELL HIM TO GET ME MY GODDAMN HAM AND EGGS!"

Later, at the station, it's all, "Yeah, David Terry, 50 years old, Woodbury. Yeah. Bury a lotta wood up there, I can tell ya that...The fuck's an occupation? Oh, a JOB? Uh, trailer park supervisor...Just send the bill to my cousin Randy, he's good for it. He'll be mad as fuck when he gets here, though, that fat fuck's gonna be hungry when he gets off the wagon in this one-horse town, and Denny can't run a restaurant for shit. You guys gotta get your act together."

The Philadelphia Inquirer, Pennsylvania, July 29, 1904

[wolfstarlights]

I’ll say it. The musical episode on psych (2006) is a fucking masterpiece. I hate it. I love it. It’s terrible and sucks ass. It’s perfect in every single way. It doesn’t make any sense at all. It’s entirely logical. It’s unironically my favourite episode of the show.

Special shoutout to “I’ve heard it both ways” for being both an absolute banger and having some real killer lyrics. “I’ve heard it both ways, the right way and then yours” — thousands are dead, no survivors. “I’m not sure which of them is cracked”-“the nuts?”-“YOU’RE cracked”-“YOU’RE nuts!” Fucking perfection man idk what to tell you.

[vivelegalite]

dear dead boy detective (especially paynland) enjoyers: have you yet heard of the biggest gift bestowed upon the fandom so far, aka jayden's charles playlist? the one he mentioned in interviews? well, he dropped it on twitter at 19th of may. and man, do i have stuff to say about it.

there's a lot of 80's bangers, for sure, great to get into the mood and character, but some of the choices...

i'm gonna focus on a few of my favourites, songs that made me go insane when i saw them. honorable mentions: - category 1 (so devoted the lines blur): ain't no mountain high enough by marvin gaye and tammi terrell, there is a light that never goes out by the smiths, inkpot gods by the amazing devil - category 2 (family life): family line and summer child by conan gray, seventeen going under by sam fender, matilda by harry styles, father by the front bottoms - category 3 (being queer in the 80s): smalltown boy by bronski beat, boys don't cry by the cure - category 4 (there's no heterosexual explanation for this one): good luck, babe! by chappel roan, yellow by coldplay, fight or flight by conan gray (is this about monty? the cat king? i need answers!), the prophecy by taylor swift, arms tonite by mother mother, sweet by cigarettes after sex, head over heels by tears for fears

this list is by no means complete or comprehensive!

and now, the songs that made me go the craziest: (they're predominantly in charles' pov as it's his playlist)

found heaven by conan gray

the only reason this song made it into the list and not the honorable mentions instead of smalltown boy is that it makes almost the same point, just so much more explicitly. i don't think i have to say much about it, it's a story of a young person griping with their queerness, being forced to leave home, a common theme of the playlist. "you're in love, you found heaven" when he chose edwin over his own afterlife, heavily implied to be heaven, and built his heaven with him on the mortal plane? ouch! (and we see this same notion repeated in another bop from the playlist, heaven is a place on earth by belinda carlisle).

2. like real people do by hozier

"i miss kissing" charles rowland, 202X romantic meaning aside, the verses show a sort of a common understanding the boys have around the manner of their deaths and their lives before it. we already know from the show they don't really talk about it, with edwin not knowing about the severity of the abuse charles suffered. it feels like one of them saying "let the past be past, we're together now, yeah?". but also, jayden: can there ever be a platonic explanation for this? ghosts can't touch, can't feel, so they wish they could just kiss like "real" (alive?) people do?

3. flaws by bastille

not the most romantic song, but i absolutely love how well it fits their dynamic. despite his edwardian brand of repression, edwin truly is the one that's more open about his feelings (recognising of course that in this case, the bar is so low it's in hell. haha, get it). edwin has worn his flaws upon his sleeve, and charles has held them buried - eg. bottling up all of his anger and resentment towards his family and his own death. the song presents a very sweet outlook, in which their flaws are brought up to the surface (for example, charles' outburst against the night nurse in episode 4), but they learn to accept them as they are, an extension of themselves.

4. a pearl by mitski

you know it's gonna get intense if there's a mitski song in the mix.

the song is about a person who finds love in their partner, someone who treats them way better than they've ever been treated - and yet they cannot bring themselves to reciprocate the affection ("it's not that i don't want you, sorry i can't take your touch") despite reciprocating the feelings themselves because of the trauma. charles is known to bottle things up ("you're growing tired of me and all the things i don't talk about"). the person in the song recognises the love the other person holds for them ("you love me so hard and i still can't sleep"), which reminds me of charles' response to edwin's confession. not a "no", but a "maybe, as time passes".

5. fair by the amazing devil

this one made me genuinely gasp when i first delved into the lyrics. it's simply so sweet, such a genuine and domestic portrayal of love. at first i thought it was way too open about being a love song (normal text instead of the subtext i'd be used to) for jayden to choose it with edwin in mind, but... there's no one else it can really be about. it's far too domestic, too "established" to refer to crystal. refers to a relationship that's laster for a longer while.

the narrator in the first verse is a person deeply in love with the other person, someone who loves to make his lover laugh and simply drinks in their presence. the "he" in the song i believe is charles, while the "she" refers to edwin. edwin promises to fight off anyone - or any feelings pulling charles down (we can see this in the first episode: "you ever think... what if death did catch us? she'd force us to go to the afterlife and split up" "i will make sure this never happens."). charles feels left behind by the world (seeing as he clings to crystal at first, refering to her as "someone their age who's still alive") and believes edwin to be so much stronger than he's ever been. i'm not going to break down the song verse by verse, but if you read it yourself while subbing out "he" for charles and "she" for edwin you'll see just how sweet (and... strangely very in character?) the song is.

6. work song by hozier

if the previous song made me gasp when i saw the lyrics, this one made me go "NO WAY" out loud when i saw the title. the first one verse is just pure toothrotting sweetness, but the chorus is what i want to draw attention to:

when my time comes around lay me gently in the cold, dark earth no grave can hold my body down i'll crawl home to her

HELLO? charles, who keeps escaping death and afterlife to be able to stay with edwin? charles, as he literally takes his last breath with edwin right there, choosing to be by his side rather than move on? charles, who keeps choosing him despite night nurse's promises and threats? charles, who literally crawled through hell for him?

verse 2, to me, can be interpreted as referring to when charles died. edwin found him at his worst, and he "woke" up with his presence comforting him. he was shivering due to hypothermia and his injuries. edwin didn't ask him about what happened or pushed him, he simply listened. the lines "i didn't care much how long i lived, but I swear, i thought i dreamed her" are pretty self explanatory.

in verse 3 we still see the same attitude of "damn the afterlife, at least we have each other" as charles portrays througout the series. they're free, and heaven and hell are simply words to him.

7. orpheus by vincent lima

i literally have no words for this one. it fits too well. if you want commentary for this one, just... i don't know, rewatch the staircase scene.

8. francesca by hozier

(cracks knuckles) this is the big one. the album francesca is from, unreal unearth, is based on dante alighieri's divine comedy, a fourteenth century poem about a man venturing into hell, purgatory and eventually heaven. the eponymous francesca is one francesca di rimini, a woman who was politically married off to a man older than her, called giovanni malatesta. francesca didn't love him, and eventually fell deep in love with giovanni's younger brother, paolo. the two carried on with the affair for years, before being murdered by giovanni upon his finding out. francesca and paolo are mentioned in canto v of the first book, inferno, as two souls damned in the second circle of hell, lust. their punishment is to be permanently locked in a hurricane, swept away by the winds the moment they manage to get close enough to touch one another.

as opposed to their portrayal in the poem, the song is from the perspective of paolo, explaining that no matter the punishment, he wouldn't change anything about his life because he got to know, and love, francesca.

the first verse brings to mind the scenes in hell, especially on the staircase ("do you think I'd give up? that this might've shook the love from me? or that I was on the brink? how could you think, darlin', i'd scare so easily?" as an echo of charles' "sorry. no version of this where i didn't come get you"). "my life was a storm since i was born, how could i fear any hurricane?" could relate to charles' tumultuous family life, an assurance that nothing he has to deal with while by edwin's side will faze him given the things he's lived through. no, despite everything he's suffered through, charles wouldn't do anything differently - because his (admittedly shitty) life led him to edwin ("i'd tell them, put me back in"). we already know charles would choose him over heaven, willingly sacrificing his own afterlife to stay with a boy he's known for hours, someone kind enough to keep him company as he drew his final breath. all of it - his father's abuse, his schoolmates' bigotry, the pain of his own death, as well as everything he's gone through since - he'd do it all again, for edwin.

"for all that was said of where we'd end up at the end of it" could be taken as an allusion to the fate the boys would meet at "at the end of it", when they're finally caught by death and separated, or as more of a general "if you sin, you will go to hell when you die" (up to you to decide what the sin itself would be - an interpretation that would work with other songs on the playlist is that one such sin would be same sex attraction). then their hearts ceased, they never knew "peace", nor did they want to find it in death. their deaths were too soon, them being ripped away from life, but even though it would break his heart: charles would ask to do it all again.

the outro, i think, beautifully pulls it all together: heaven is not fit to house a love like theirs.

to wrap it all up:

jayden, what were you cooking in there? what do you know??