#what a soft chapter

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Bonus- Chapter 27

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

Hello!!!

It's been a hot minute since my last chapter update; so busy on my end!

This weekend was jam packed with family. We went for dinner and then drag bingo Friday, had an all day horror movie marathon Saturday, and then some more hangouts today. It was a lovely weekend, but I am glad to be back with my nighttime tea and a chapter.

For extra chill vibes I did smoke a joint before my chamomile tea- so be forewarned this chapter was read while I was quite stoned. (Info: I live in Canada, weed is legal everywhere here).

That being said thank fuck this chapter was short or else it would have taken me so long to get through LOL

Let's gooooo

I am already unprepared for this dream realm sequence. Every time we go into a dream it ends up being awkward as hell for SQQ p259

Interesting- will this be Mu Qingfang centric? (it was not at all LOL) p259

Okay wait. Is this not LBH's dream realm? Why isn't he responding to SQQ? p260

aaaaaaaaand we're back on LBH's corpse boyfriend nonsense. I still cannot get over that this guy just kept a corpse 😭😭 I truly hated the way he handled SQQ's corpse, It gives me the ick. p263

oooo! memory within a dream?? p264

This is so upsetting. The way in which this child (16yo) preferred to get beaten every day by another peaks disciples than have his Shizun (rightfully so) confront the other peak lord to discipline his disciples is so sad. p266

And the fact that he would rather take care of his own wounds than seek help :((( p266

Oh gosh. the clothes removing and salve massaging truly did not help LBH and his feelings for his shizun at all LOL p267

OMG. this poor guy is struggling through this; Shen Qingqiu's right palm pressed seamlessly against the bare skin of Luo Binghe's back as it moved slowly. "Does this feel alright?" Luo Binghe didn't speak. He seemed to be biting his lip. Shen Qinqgiu has one hand on waist as he massaged, light and gentle" p269. I truly hope SQQ looked back on this moment and thought about it from SQQ's perspective.

This did NOT get better, oh no! not the butt slap while he was holding this guy to his chest. p270

RIP Luo BInghe's face and his boner. p272. Same bro, I would be so embarrassed that I ran away after that.

oh god. The disciples all just coming out for the show thinking that SQQ was beating LBH again. Meanwhile LBH is fighting for his LIFE to get to the cold pond. p273

Honestly their communication has improved so much! Good for them! I'm glad that LBH did eventually tell SQQ what he was going through that night. p276

oooof. my heart. the fact that LBH would make SQQ's favourites everyday when his corpse was in Huan Hua Palace. All of this just in case he woke up; so he would have a hot meal. p277

He was almost trapped in the dream?!?!? that's horrifying. p280

This was actually kind of a sweet chapter!

His memory of his student and his 16yo boner aside; it was really sweet. All things considered, even the corpse holding was kind of soft. We even got insight into these two communicating well in their present relationship AND enthusiastic consent for once!

Way to go Bingqiu!

[sans-guy]

do not give me a man because i will make them my housewife and also fat probably

[onifanss]

Tharchog x Yansae •

[johnslittlespoon]

Tough And Sweet (Like You And Me)

Ch. 4/? – 'Who's Gonna Drive You Home Tonight?'

[WC: 46K | Gale Cleven/John Egan, College AU, The Bikeriders AU, Age Gap, Emotional Slowburn, Hurt/Comfort, Set in 2005ish]

College student John Egan ends up in an old pub on the other side of his small town, where he has a chance encounter with biker and mechanic Gale Cleven. Unconventional circumstances be damned, John is a lovesick fool.

[AO3 LINK]

[kurikorso]

the deer prince and the golden doe

from chapter 34 of Salt00's fic Chick Magnet

please click for HD tumblr is killing this one

[writingdevil]

Tongues and Teeth PT.9 (STP)

(There will be an Epilogue!So I will say all my final thoughts then!Also,I was thinking about accepting any STP prompts you might want to see-whether it be shipping or otherwise.I just want to write more for this fandom so feel free to send in any prompts! For now-enjoy,and I hope you've enjoyed the journey thus far!)

*

"OPPY!"

That was the last thing Opportunist heard before pain exploded all over his body,and he lost consciousness.

Losing consciousness in his own body was much different than when the Decider did.In His head, everything just felt like blinking-one minute you're being skewered by a princess with blades for arms, and the next-you're arguing with an Echo on a path again.

But right now,everything just felt-peaceful.It felt like he was having a deep,relaxing nap,and nothing could touch him anymore.None of the outside problems felt important anymore while in this state.There wasn't a need for performing,or lying or scheming.

All there was,was him and and this eternal slumber.

Was it bad to want to stay like this?

The more he thought about it,the clearer his brain became,until there was a throbbing pain in the back of his head.At first,he thought it was his body punishing him for thinking such things-until he realised that he was just waking up.

He bit down on the groan of pain threatening to expose his weakness and status,blinking blearily up at the pink sky.

He was lying down on the ground,not in the field anymore,so he could only assume he had been taken back to camp.He just kept staring at the blushing sky,wondering how long he had been out.

When he heard a mixture of light and heavy footsteps,he immediately closed his eyes again and feigned sleeping.The footsteps got closer,until he heard a sigh that was undeniably Broken.

He felt the sad,pitying eyes on him as Broken asked,"Do you think he'll wake up?"

Then a gruff voice that could only be Stubborn,let a huff of laughter out as he said,"Of course he will. He'd crawl out of hell if it meant getting his way with us.He'll be awake in no time."

A long pause.Then,Broken quietly pointed out,"It's been a whole day."

He heard Stubborn sigh,then said,"Yeah,but he'll pull through,I know it.C'mon,let's go."

He heard nothing else as they walked away,and Opportunist waited a whole five minutes before opening his eyes,sighing tiredly.

A whole day?He'd been out that long,and they hadn't thought to get rid of him?Maybe they just didn't want his dirty blood on their conscience.Yeah that made more sense for why they had kept him alive.

He was aware that his mind was-more messy than it usually was.Dark thoughts that Opportunist usually buried deep behind his fake smiles, were now freely bouncing around in his head,and he simply didn't have the mental energy to push them away right now,which was a problem.

It was a problem because it meant he couldn't successfully use his mask in this state.

He can't believe that he's in this position because he decided to protect Hero and Paranoid.Why did he think that would be a good idea?How would that give him an advantage?Sure,it made him look good,but he certainly didn't feel good right now.

The only thing he knew was that he remembered that monster slipping past them and rushing straight for the two of them.

All Opportunist knew in that moment was the cold horror that took over him,and his body moved before his mind realised what he was doing.All he knew was that he had to protect his flock.

He slowly sat up,quietly hissing to himself in pain. He could feel something on the back of his head, and his back ached as well.He had to take a few minutes to let the pain finish drumming through his body,before he was able to think coherently again.

Everything seemed relatively okay now,so that must meant that Hero and Paranoid were alive and well.Which was great!The whole flock's back together,just like how Paranoid wanted.The goal that the two of them had set out to do was completed. All the fragments had been put back together.

But now it was time for Opportunist to leave the picture.

The minuscule act of twisting his body around alone was enough to send waves of pain through him,but he kept going.

There's no-point in Opportunist sticking around anymore,and the others would see that soon enough.They would realise that Opportunist had no place in their lives anymore,and would be desperate to kick the backstabber out,so he might as well just show himself out while he still had some dignity left.

He tried standing up,but that proved to be too much right now,and he ended up clutching his head in dizzy pain.But the urge to leave only grew stronger,a desperate panic that was building up inside of him.

He needed to leave.He's done his job,and now they have no use for him anymore.What was the point of someone like him without a purpose?Back with Him,although the others may not have liked him, they could at least understand that he was needed in that situation,just a voice in someone's head.

But now they were free,with their own confusing bodies and feelings,so they could do whatever they wanted,whether that was stick together or go their separate ways.

The thing was,though-that Opportunist didn't belong in one of those options.There was no use for an opportunist when your life wasn't in danger,or when everyone's reunited and happy.Why would there be?All that you're left with is someone that you know will betray you if it meant that they got a better hand.

There wasn't a need for Opportunist when all the others want is a peaceful life,so he had no choice but to leave.His flock could finally be happy without him,because they could never trust a self-serving backstabber like him.

Getting to his feet was clearly too hard right now,so he settled for shifting to his knees,which still had his head banging,but he managed to go through with the action.

He sat there,waiting for his head to stop spinning, so he didn't hear the rustling of leaves,until he saw Hunted standing right in front of him,crouched to be face-to-face.

"You need to rest,"Hunted softly insisted,but Opportunist just waved him away and replied,"I'm fine,Hunted.Just give me a few minutes and I'll be up and ready to go."

Hunted shook his head,missing the true meaning in Opportunist's words,and said,"No,you need to rest. You have a concussion."

"Oh,is that what happened?"

"Yes.You were bleeding as well,but that's stopped now."

"How?"

Opportunist couldn't do anything to stop Hunted from gently reaching for the back of his head and softly touching it.Opportunist winced,and Hunted explained,"The forest has herbs that heal,that can be used as medicine.I found some,stopped the bleeding,used leaves to protect your skull."

So that was what he was feeling against his head. He scrunched his face up in discomfort as Hunted carefully peeled the leaves off his head,and he dreaded to think about the mess his feathers were in now.

Hunted studied him with a cautious eye."You should go back to sleep.I can watch over you." Opportunist grimaced and made a noise of complaint at the suggestion,missing the surprised look on Hunted.

He placed his palms firmly on the ground as he said,"Thanks,but no thanks.I won't take up much more of your time."He made another attempt at standing,but this one was stopped by Hunted gently grabbing his wrists."What are you doing?"

Opportunist just gave him a pointed look."I'm trying to leave."Instantly,Hunted's eyes went wide with panic,feathers puffing up in alarm not unlike Paranoid.He shook his head firmly."No.You need to stay. You're not well enough,and safer with us."

Opportunist rolled his eyes,which only worsened his pain,then quietly said,"It's fine,Hunty.I know when I'm not needed.I'll be out of all your feathers now."He managed to rip his hands out of Hunted's grasp,but that may have been due to the other bird's shock.

Everything was getting too honest for his liking,so without waiting another moment,he shot to his feet,groaning low as he swayed and struggled to keep his balance.Hunted made a sound of concerned surprise,standing up as well and reaching his arms out to catch him.

But Opportunist could stand on his own two feet. He's used to doing a lot of things by himself,and this time would be no different,no matter how much he appreciated Hunted fretting over him.It didn't matter.Hunted doesn't want somebody like him.

"Stop-sit down,"Hunted urged,but Opportunist didn't even give him a shining smile as he said, "Don't worry about it.You'll all be glad to get rid of me,I just know it."in a tired,empty voice.

Hunted valued survival.So did Opportunist.It's what made them great counterparts.But the only way for Hunted and the others to feel safe,was to get rid of the annoyance that nobody wanted anymore.

Opportunist could respect that,admire that even. He tried to show that to the other,that he was completely fine and put together and not falling apart.But when he looked at Hunted,his voice was quiet yet brimming with too raw emotions,and he found that he couldn't look Hunted in the eyes as he whispered,"I know you all hate me,so just let me leave in peace."

Hunted stared at him in shock.

That-That shouldn't of come out.

This fucking concussion was ruining everything.

He stared at Hunted,knowing that he should smile at him,should say or do something to show that he was confident and in control of everything-but he just wasn't right now.

Hunted continued to stare at him,and then he quietly said,"You need water.Stay here,"and then he ran off.

Yeah,like he was staying for that long.

He sighed,trying his hardest to keep his balance as he put one foot in front of the other.The pain beat against his skull without mercy,or even a break,and all Opportunist wanted was to lie down and never get back up again.

But what he really needed to do is leave,before the mask slipped off.

He took another shaky step forward,irritation in his veins at how easily his composure had broken,at how he was struggling to keep up his facade and keep his emotions hidden from everyone else.

It's usually a skill he prided himself on-being able to sense where the power was and latch onto it,his own feelings discarded.It never used to bother him, because he believed that the voices in power could protect Him,even when he knew the whole shitshow was a cycle.

It didn't matter to him how fucked up everything was.He'd play the game,and he'd win,and he would use every ruthless trick to get his way,and they had all been none the wiser.Even now,before his injury. Everyone kept trying go figure out his next trick.

Another step forward.

But all those accusations and suspicions would do them no good in this environment.This wasn't a game to win,this was just reality for them now.

He can't be useful to them anymore.They don't want him around anymore,even if the thought of him leaving them made him want to sob.But he knows better than anyone that you do what you have to do to survive,and Opportunist was no longer necessary to the flock,so it was time to go.

Say what you will about Opportunist,but he truly, deeply loved his flock,and he did everything he could to keep the Long Quiet safe.

Safety.He's only ever wanted to feel safe.Whether that be by deception,manipulation or sucking up to the one with the most power.All he ever wanted was to feel safe.

He's not,but at least they are,and that's good enough for him.

He tried to take another step forward-

"There he is."That was Hunted's voice,and he froze, slowly twisting to look over his shoulder,and any hope of clinging to a mask faded away,as Paranoid stood there,pure rage and grief on his face.

Their eyes locked,and Opportunist's knees buckled as Paranoid screamed,"Did you actually fucking think that we'd let you leave?!"

The sound went straight to his head,and turning to face them only made it worse,and it seemed like he merely blinked,and then Paranoid crashed into his arms,sending them to the ground as he hugged him with a deathly desperation.

Opportunist groaned in pain at the movement,but his body still betrayed him and melted into the hug, sagging in relief as he rested his head in the crook of Paranoid's neck.

Hunted silently came forward,only coming close enough to make sure that his head was okay,still giving the two of them space.

He immediately felt Paranoid breathing pick up,but before Opportunist could say anything to calm him down,he burst into tears,squeezing Opportunist tighter as if afraid he'd disappear.

"You fucking asshole,"Paranoid snapped at him, "Why are you trying to leave?"Opportunist tried to come up with any lie to tell him,but his brain had definitely turned to mush at this point,and he shrugged and said,"Thought it was best for you."

"What do you mean?"

"You don't have to put up with me anymore.You don't need me anymore."He felt Paranoid's hands clutch him tighter,then he said in a low and soft voice,"You think we want you to leave?"

"Don't you?"He pressed his face closer to Paranoid's neck,his mind overwhelmed with too many different sensations,all demanding to be felt at the same time-pain,warmth,exhaustion, lonliness-they were all spinning around in his head.

"Thought you all didn't trust me,"he mumbled,and he felt the way Paranoid stiffened against him."It's fine if you don't-said so yourself,remember?"He giggled,as if he was the big joke here.He patted Paranoid's back."You got the flock back,Paranoid. You don't need a dirty liar like me anymore."

They sat in silence for what felt like hours to Opportunist's spinning head,but it was probably only a few minutes.He saw Hunted backing away, before he took off,leaving them truly alone now.

Paranoid sighed,and then gently leaned back to look him in the eyes.He was glaring at him,but for some reason,it didn't have its usual heat that Opportunist was so used to.

He narrowed his eyes at him,then said,"You told me that you liked being part of a flock.Was that just a lie?"Opportunist shook his head,then winced at the pain it brought him.He tried to ignore Paranoid's concerned face as he replied,"No-wasn't lying then. But let's face it,none of you trust me,and you don't need me anymore.I've done my job-I got us to our goal.Now I can leave you all alone."

He saw anger flicker in Paranoid's eyes."You think I care about how good of a job you do?You think I'd never want to see you again,after all we've done to find everyone,to trust each other?"

"Don't you?"he whispered,and Paranoid's feathers bristled as he went,"No,actually.Because there was this little birdie that said that we'd make a good team,and then I actually started to believe it,and I really liked you having my back,but then you got hit and I thought you were dead-"

Paranoid's rant was paused as he broke into quiet sobs that broke Opportunist's heart,at the fact that he was getting so worked up over him leaving.Why?Why would he care about him so much?

He never got an answer,because when Paranoid's crying turned to sniffling,was when Hero arrived, accompanied by Hunted.

He gave Opportunist a soft smile,and even though he could still see the sadness in Hero's eyes,the smile still sent a wave of warmth and relief through him,as if his body could finally accept that things could be okay now.

"Hunted said you were awake,"Hero said,then sat down next to them,his eyes only on Opportunist. "How are you feeling?"

"Feeling a lot,"he mumbled,and Hero chuckled.It was the truth,and it felt weird to be honest,to talk to their leader without a mask on.Hero glanced at Paranoid,who was silent,his head bowed low and staring at Opportunist's chest with an unreadable expression.

"I wanted to say thank you,"Hero's words brought him back to reality,and Opportunist looked back at Hero,going,"For what?Saving you?"he waved his hand in the air casually as he said,"Don't mention it,we all would've done it to save you-"

"No,I mean-thank you for bringing the flock back together."

Opportunist froze,and he felt Paranoid rub a hand up and down in arm in comfort.

Hero gave him a sad smile."Thank you for thinking about them and making sure everyone was safe." Hero chuckled,but it sounded hollow."Usually I'm the one taking care of all of you,but I...haven't been having the best time,if I'm honest."

For a split second,Hero's smile cracked,and Opportunist saw the pure heartbreak in his eyes, and then it was gone again,replaced with that kind smile.It hadn't occurred to Opportunist that their Hero would have a mask of his own.It made Opportunist focus a little bit more on him.

"I'm sorry-for what I tried to do."

"You don't have to apologise,"Paranoid softly said, as if they've had this conversation over and over again.Hero sighed,and his eyes shone with unshed tears.

"I know,I know.It's just-everything's kinda messed up,isn't it?"he said,and Opportunist could do nothing but nod."It's like-He's gone-"and Hero's voice cracked,"-and we're just left like this.We both got our freedom,but none of us know what to do with it.We all handled it in different ways."

They really did.Smitten and Skeptic wanted to get back to the Decider.Stubborn just wanted to fight something.Hero attempted to open a cabin for some unfathomable reason.

They were all just trying to fill the hole the Long Quiet left.

Hero reached forward and took his hand."It's hard," he whispered,"but I'm glad that you two found each other and found our flock.You made everyone feel a little less lost,and I don't think you understand how much everyone appreciated that."

Hero gave no warning as he leaned forward and pulled him into a soft hug,and Opportunist sighed at how safe he suddenly felt now.

"No one hates you,Oppy."He wanted to be surprised at his nickname being used,but he just said, "Really?"

"Yes.You were frustrating sometimes,but I could never hate you.Besides,I know it was all for Him.I know you loved Him in your own way,same that we all did."Hero gave him a light squeeze,and his breath hitched,and he felt Hero rub his back and Hunted preen the feathers on his head and it was all just too much love that he didn't deserve.

But then he locked eyes with Jitters and the other bird gave him a soft yet stern look."You were born into this flock.It's gonna take more than masks to get out of it."

Then,Opportunist smiled-a small,unsure smile,but one that Jitters relaxed at nonetheless.

"Hey,he's awake!"

Opportunist jumped in surprise,and Hero thankfully released him from the hug,giving him a comforting smile,as all the others walked up.

Skeptic crouched in front of them,giving Opportunist a critical once over,Smitten hovering behind his back."How's your head?"Skeptic asked, and Opportunist tiredly replied,"Sore,"and was honestly getting sick of the dizzy pain at this point.

Smitten gave him a sympathetic look."Maybe some food and water will ease your mind."

"Then rest,"Hunted insisted,and Opportunist nodded,as Jitters answered for him,"He will.I'll make sure of it."

Cheated stepped to the side and tried to look at the back of his head,to which Hunted blocked instantly. "I'm surprised you're even able to see straight.You were sent flying into that rock."

Opportunist shrugged,then said,"I'm just as surprised as you.I guess I'm just a lucky bird."and then he gave Cheated a pointed look.

Cheated's feathers puffed up in annoyance and he snapped,"Oh,fuck off."but he was still smiling.

From his left,Jitters let a noise of surprise out,and when he twisted around,he found Contrarian next to them,lying on the ground and resting his chin in his palms,kicking his feet up and down.

The look in his eyes meant nothing but trouble as he said,"Hey,guess what?"

"What?"

"I thought of more puns."

Immediately,Opportunist's wings raised as a barricade between him and Contrarian as he hissed,"Is that a fucking threat?"

Contrarian only grinned wider and said,"Maybe next time you should get something that con-cussion your fall."

Opportunist burst out laughing.

He tried to cover his mouth as he laughed in front of everyone with no mask,no facade-just him being Oppy.

But his hand froze as he heard both Hero and Jitters join in,and although his face burnt,he forced himself to be himself in front of everyone,and everyone was just smiling at them.

Still,he lowered his head,until he subtly took Jitters' hand,squeezing it once.As a thank you,as an apology,as pure gratitude,for just liking what he saw in Opportunist.

He saw the way Jitters' smile got that tiny bit more softer-because of him-and he knew that everything would be okay.

The Long Quiet may be gone,but they all have each other,and being around his flock that he loved so much, was the only choice that mattered to him now-and that was the one thing about him that had been real from the start.

[queenie-ofthe-void]

A Desperate Fool - Part 7

Part 6

Last time: Eddie learns why everyone quit calling

~~~

He runs a hand through his tangled hair, bringing him back to the present as he looks across at Nancy. She’s leaned into the back of the couch, feet still perched in his lap. Eddie’s almost forgotten what the force of Nancy’s gaze feels like, full of heavy emotions weighing him down. He’s lost so much time with his family, missed so much. Nancy hands him a box of tissues as he dries his eyes on his sleeve.

A look of regret crosses her face. “We can take a break, you know. We don’t have to go over it all right now.”

“No, Nance. I need to hear this. I want to hear this.”

She looks at him for a long moment. Eddie’s not entirely sure what face he’s making, but Nancy must sense his resolve, so she continues with her story.

While living with Nancy, Robin was able to get them both a job working as servers at a cafe around the corner. Between making a decent amount in tips and scheduling his own hours, Steve was able to finish his teaching degree.

“Robin quit her job?” Eddie asks, surprised. “I thought she made good money as a private language tutor.”

Nancy chuckles, like he’s missing out on the joke. “Really? You don’t think Robin wouldn’t quit her job in a heartbeat if it meant getting to work with Steve? Especially when he needed it most.”

He smiles. Yeah, of course she would. Even when Eddie and Steve were at their best, he’s still not sure he could ever love Steve as much as Robin, but fuck if he didn’t try every day to prove otherwise. 

Why did he ever stop trying?

A happier occasion than the last move, the two found a bigger place closer to Steve's new job. By October, Steve had charmed the Principal into hiring Robin to teach Spanish and French. They were doing well– and still are, Nancy adds on with a smile.

Eddie doesn’t deserve to feel proud of Steve, knowing he’s the reason Steve had to put his life on hold, but he smiles regardless. Nancy squeezes his ankle, still propped in her lap, like she can read his thoughts. It’s encouraging to know that after everything, she’s still here with him. He doesn’t deserve her either.

“He loves his job, Eddie. You know he’s always been good with kids.”

“I know,” he says, tipping his head back to keep the tears pooled in his eyes. “Elementary, right?”

Nancy sighs, a small laugh escaping on the exhale, “Kindergarten Phys. Ed., to be exact.”

And god, Eddie can’t help but laugh. He can imagine Steve in his favorite blue track pants, white t-shirt, with a whistle around his neck, teaching the kids how to play parachute and tag. Running around and building obstacle courses with them, consoling them when they stumble. 

The tears fall anyway, but Eddie’s smile is still bright and shiny. He can’t remember the last time he’s laughed, true happiness fizzing like tiny bubbles in his chest.

It’s a little bittersweet to hear Steve's doing well, but that's just the small, selfish part of him wallowing in the fact that he's not the person making him happy. Still, Steve's doing well, and that means everything in the world to Eddie.

~~~

Part 8

Tag List!!!

@sadisticaltarts @5ammi90 @blacklegsanji21 @jaytriesstrangerthings @thewickedkat

@stripey82

[yumedoca]

HOLY SHIT, WHY IS THERE A DETCO REFERENCE IN MY URUSEI YATSURA??

Anyway, this reference is really funny and cute (and I think some episodes ago there was another reference but I'm not entirely sure for that one) since Detco also has a bunch of references to UY as well (this how I discovered Detco in the first place btw), so it's kind of like the UY remake is returning the favor :)

This is only one of them, there's a whole section in the UY wiki which lists most of them (which you can find here).

[winterrbluess]

Spoilers

Well that marks the end of jjk.. I'm not really happy with how all this turned out but the story will always be close to my heart. Though a lotttt of questions went unanswered and apparently everything is fine now. Most of the dead and injured are back and dandy moving to live their lives in normalcy. Our main trio is back to their work. I will admit it was quite nice seeing them being dumb and just normal(their happy faces are all i could ask for) But it did feel lacking...I picked up JJK because of how it dealt with "trauma and the effect it has on a person".

We see Geto's spiral and his downfall because of how he decided to cope with his despair, We see Gojo's struggle because he couldn't come to terms with his own trauma and was struck at the age of 17, going out in a glorious fight yet living an unsatisfied life, alone. Toji's trauma making him unable to live a good life. The narrative always had consequences of how these characters chose to cope and process their griefs and traumas.

We see Yuji and Megumi go through the same path but Yuji finally coming in terms with his grief and finds value in life without any proper role, Megumi's monologue about wanting a simple life without any burden of being the future Strongest and just wanting to live for people who cared for him, these felt cathartic because we finally got the resolution of these characters' unhealthy coping mechanisms blowing up in their faces leading them to their worst nightmare and forcing them to face and come in terms with their traumas and i was in awe watching these characters still look forward for future.. whatever it may hold. But now coming to present after such a long physically and mentally exhausting fight and everyone's...just fine? These are the characters who faced near death experiences and yet there's no sign of any traumatic consequences of that. Yuta is perfectly fine after body hopping his beloved (dead) sensei with no lasting or any trauma at all. Higuruma, Kusakabe both are on their own paths free from any repercussions even the law has been taken care of. No one is going to stop Mei Mei exploiting her brother, not even question it. The world was in chaos and now it's fine. I'd even say more like in pre Shibuya stage and that's something i'm not able to accept. After ch-268 it seems every other nuance was dropped to just finish it..

I can see Yuji's arc ending with a good resolution and a fresh start for Megumi's arc ( I'm bummed we barely got any of his thoughts or a proper conversation between him and Yuji..his arc kinda became "yeah all that happened...moving on") but all this feels so...unsatisfying. I was waiting for the manga to end before making any judgement hoping Gege was actually messing around but it seems he was pretty serious. It just feels in the end JJK lost track of what it was.. i can't believe I'm saying this..but I don't really feel anything. It concluded yeah.. everything is tied in a neat little bow.

Though I'm still happy I got to experience this story for what it was. It has been a hell of a ride and one i enjoyed a lot.

[fishareglorious]

reading this again, and😬 eee. not really, kakania.

i mean, she ends up landing the killing blow on her already dying mentor. not really something that builds good friendship with anyone.

[steddieas-shegoes]

Chapter 9

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8

Steve woke up to Eddie carrying him to his bed.

Lips were on his forehead, his eyes were closing again.

He would’ve thought he dreamt it if not for the fact that he woke up in his bed, Eddie curled around him, his alarm loud enough to echo around the room.

Eddie tightened his arms around him, nudging his nose in between Steve’s neck and shoulder and breathing in.

When he exhaled, Steve giggled and scrunched his shoulders up.

“Mornin’ sunshine,” Eddie mumbled against his skin, voice rough with sleep.

“Mornin’.”

“So cozy.”

“Mhmmmm.”

They stayed like that for another few seconds before Steve shifted out of Eddie’s arms, shutting off his alarm and curling back up against Eddie’s chest.

“Gonna get up?”

Eddie’s voice rumbled against Steve’s ears, the vibrations from his chest keeping Steve relaxed.

“Do I have to?”

“You’ve got work, sweetheart.”

“Rather be with you.”

And he did. He wanted to stay right in this spot for the rest of his life, be held by Eddie so he could only see, feel, hear, smell, and taste Eddie.

“I know, but you gotta see your kiddos.”

He liked that Eddie knew how special his job was to him, that he saw how much he loved it and cared about the kids he worked with.

“They’ll understand. They’ve wanted me to get a boyfriend for the whole school year.”

Eddie huffed out a laugh, breath fanning Steve’s hair slightly.

“I guess you better tell them you’ve met their standards then.”

“Ah, but have you?”

“Welllll…have I?”

“I guess we’ll see.”

“And how will we do that?”

Eddie’s fingers were tracing patterns along his back, his mouth moving against the top of his head as he spoke.

“You’ll have to visit me at my office.”

“Oh? And what will we do to prove that I’m worthy of you? Should I bring flowers and a picnic basket full of food? Or rent out the auditorium so I can sing to you in front of the whole school? Maybe I should spell out our names in a heart on the football field?” He peppered Steve with kisses in between each ridiculous question, making Steve laugh.

He felt so carefree, so light.

He felt like sunshine.

“If you ask some of my students, they’d say all of the above and it still wouldn’t be enough.”

“They love you a lot,” Eddie said as he pulled back, looking down at Steve with the fond smile he’d grown to recognize.

“Yeah. I love them a lot, too,” he smiled up at Eddie, eyes still heavy from sleep.

“Stevie?”

Eddie suddenly looked nervous and Steve’s sunshine dulled, clouds coming in to surround him.

“Yeah?”

“Do you remember what you said last night when you were falling asleep, sweetheart?”

He racked his brain trying to think of anything he could have said last night. He was really exhausted after everything, the memory of Eddie’s hands on him making goosebumps raise on his skin.

“I don’t think so. Was it embarrassing?”

“No. Not to me,” Eddie took a deep breath. “Don’t panic okay? You don’t have to panic.”

What the hell did he say? Why would he panic?

Now he was panicking.

Eddie’s hands rubbing up and down his back weren’t even helping.

He felt his breath becoming shorter and less frequent, his chest squeezing, heart racing.

He felt his hands tingle and his feet lose feeling.

He started to get tunnel vision.

And then Eddie’s fingers were gripping his chin tight, making him focus on his face. The grip was probably enough to leave bruises if he stayed long enough, but he knew Eddie would let go as soon as he had all of his attention.

“What did I say?”

Steve whimpered. The grip didn’t hurt, but it was strong enough to make him feel helpless and like maybe Eddie would make it hurt if that’s what it took to get him to stop panicking.

“Keep your eyes on me. I’m gonna tell you what you said and then I’m gonna take you to the shower so we can get you ready for work. Got it?”

“Mhm.”

“When you were falling asleep, you said you loved me.” Steve felt the panic rising again as Eddie spoke, but Eddie squeezed his chin between his fingers again. “If it was just something you said because you were on an adrenaline high, I understand. We can forget you said it.”

Steve didn’t want that. He meant it. He didn’t want Eddie to think he didn’t mean it just because he’d been mostly asleep when he said it.

“Or. I let go of your face, and you tell me you love me because you mean it for real right now. You tell me with your eyes open and completely aware of how much I fucking love you.”

Steve knew that without the fingers gripping his chin, his jaw would be wide open in shock.

This was crazy.

This was insane.

Of course he loved Eddie. He’d said it to himself too often over the last couple of days not to know it deeply. He’d said it out loud last night, probably subconsciously hoping that Eddie would know he meant everything to him because he deserved to know he was loved.

But Eddie loving him? In the same intense way Steve loved him?

It seemed impossible.

But the way Eddie’s eyes were shining and his serious face was replaced by nothing but fond, fond, fond, Steve knew he meant it.

Eddie loved Steve.

“I meant it. Of course I meant it. How could I not?”

Eddie beamed down at him before pushing him back, rolling on top of him, and kissing him senseless.

Steve moaned into the kiss, arching his back so every inch of his body could be touching Eddie’s.

He never got tired of feeling Eddie against him. It was endless fire, warmth without burning, a second away from combusting with love.

Eddie’s hips rocked down into Steve’s, both of them moaning into each others’ mouths.

They were both only in boxers, providing them with barely any separation between their already hard cocks.

Steve rocked up, biting Eddie’s bottom lip between his teeth as he moved. In the back of his mind, he knew continuing like this would make him late for work, but he couldn’t find it in him to actually care.

He could be late.

He was being loved by Eddie.

“Feels so good, sweet thing,” Eddie moaned into his mouth.

They rocked against each other, naturally finding a rhythm that wasn’t too slow, but wasn’t rushed. Their cocks brushed just right against each other, the fabric of their boxers providing just enough extra friction to bring them closer to the edge.

Steve felt the heat building, the twist in his stomach that meant he was getting close. He sped up, his hips rocking up faster and faster.

He didn’t care if he looked desperate, he was.

Eddie’s body heat was bordering on too much, sweat breaking out along his forehead and chest. Everywhere they touched sent a spark through Steve’s body.

“Gonna…can I? Please, please, please,” Steve panted out, his words interrupted by whimpers when Eddie pinched one of his nipples between his fingers.

“You wanna cum, sweet thing?”

Steve nodded, gasping as Eddie’s fingers found his other nipple, pinching it, the sharp zing of pain almost as distracting as the pleasure rocking through him.

But Eddie slowed his hips, moved his hands away from Steve’s chest, and placed a soft kiss on his forehead.

Then his hips stopped completely.

“No,” Steve whined. “Please. No. Need to.”

Eddie shook his head.

“No, sweetheart. You have to go to work.”

“Like this? I can’t. Eddie, please.”

“I think you can. I think you should go cool off in the shower, and if you’re a good boy, I’ll take care of you tonight.”

Eddie was pulling away.

No.

“Please. I can do it myself! I’ll be quick,” Steve begged, hands squeezing Eddie’s sides as he rocked his hips up searching for more friction.

Eddie pulled away further, barely touching Steve now.

“Sunshine, you have to get to work. You’re gonna go take a shower and not touch yourself, right?”

Steve whimpered in response, his body fighting against everything Eddie was asking of him. His cock was leaking so much precum, he would’ve thought he’d actually finished somehow.

Then Eddie touched his cheek, thumb pressing into his bottom lip.

“Color?”

Steve wanted to say red. He wanted to cum. He wanted Eddie to cum.

But more than that, he wanted to do what Eddie asked, he wanted to make Eddie proud.

And he knew that if he just took a moment, and a cold shower, he could probably do this.

“Green.”

Eddie beamed at him.

“That’s my good boy. You’re gonna be good for me, aren’t you?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve said breathlessly.

He was rewarded with a kiss, not nearly as hot and heavy as before, but still full of the love and passion they both felt.

Steve sighed when Eddie pulled away and got off the bed, but gave him a soft smile as he pulled his pants on and carefully tucked himself in before buttoning them.

“Gonna make you some breakfast. You go shower, sunshine.”

Steve nodded and leaned up to get another kiss.

Just before Eddie made it out the door, Steve sat up all the way.

“Wait!”

Eddie paused and turned to him, frown on his face as if he was concerned, but he had no reason to be.

“I love you,” Steve said with a fond smile.

“I love you, too, Stevie,” Eddie replied, face scrunching with a huge smile.

It didn’t feel real that he was getting this, that he was loving Eddie and Eddie was loving him, that he was happy in a way he’d never dreamed possible.

He felt like he was floating on a cloud constantly.

He never wanted to come back down.

——————

Steve was able to calm down in the shower. He could still feel it, the edge at his toes, but it was more reserved.

Like he could step back and enjoy the view instead of jump headfirst.

He ate breakfast with Eddie by his side, leaning against his shoulder as he sipped his coffee made to perfection and toast with strawberry jam.

Eddie told him about his half day session today with one of his favorite clients, his excitement about the artwork making Steve proud that Eddie was able to create such special, permanent memories for everyone.

He looked down at the sun on his wrist, noticing that the edges seemed to be peeling a little.

Eddie noticed, of course he noticed, that Steve seemed distracted.

“Something wrong, sunshine?”

“Um. I know you said it would peel, but is this okay?” Steve asked as he held up his wrist in front of Eddie’s face.

Eddie looked at it for a few seconds, then placed a soft kiss against the center of it.

“It’s perfect. You should put some lotion or Vaseline on it though, today and tomorrow. Want me to do it?”

Steve nodded.

He was perfectly capable of doing it all himself, both of them knew that. But it was nice to let Eddie take care of him, even with something as simple as this. Eddie seemed to want to just as much as Steve wanted him to.

So Steve started cleaning up the dishes from breakfast as Eddie walked to the bathroom to grab the Vaseline Steve had been keeping on the counter since he got the tattoo.

He was back quickly, hands wrapping around Steve’s waist from behind, lips trailing kisses up his neck until Steve tilted his head so he could reach his jaw too.

“You’re making it hard to go to work,” Steve groaned.

“Oh, am I making it hard?” Eddie teased back.

“You’re insufferable.”

“You love me.”

Steve turned around in Eddie’s arms, wrapping his arms around his neck.

“I do.”

They stood like that for probably too long, but Steve couldn’t find it in him to care.

Every moment with Eddie was worth whatever tardiness he had to deal with later.

Eddie gently pulled his tattooed wrist from around his neck and placed another kiss to the center of the tattoo before he opened the Vaseline and applied some to the area.

“All set.”

“Thanks, baby.”

“Anytime, sweetheart.”

“When will you be done with your session today?”

“Probably about six or so. Depends if he wants to make it through the whole time or not.”

“Want me to meet you at the shop with dinner?”

Steve knew he was being clingy, and he wouldn’t blame Eddie if he needed a night off. But his words from earlier rang through Steve’s mind, about taking care of him.

“That sounds lovely, sunshine. How about pizza?”

“Mkay. What kind?”

“Hmmm. Why don’t you guess? Surprise me.”

“What if I get it wrong?”

“Then I eat you for dinner instead,” Eddie smirked before leaning in for one more quick kiss to his lips.

Steve walked out with him, sneaking one more kiss in before he got in his car and drove to work.

If this was what every morning could be like, he wanted it.

———————

Just before Steve took his lunch break, there was a knock on his office door. He didn’t have anyone scheduled, so he assumed it was one of the front office people or a teacher.

“Come in!”

The door opened and a very familiar face popped his head in.

“Eddie?” Steve stood up so fast from his chair, he got a head rush.

“It’s me.”

“I thought your appointment started!”

Steve walked around his desk and over to where Eddie was still standing in the doorway. He looked nervous for some reason, and since he never looked nervous, Steve felt his stomach drop.

“He said he was gonna be an hour late, so I thought I’d stop by. Hope that’s okay?”

Steve fisted his hand in his shirt and pulled him all the way into his office, shoving the door closed as soon as he was all the way in.

He pushed him against the door and smiled up at his shocked face.

But before he could kiss him, he caught a glimpse of color. Yellow.

Oh my god.

“Did you bring me flowers?”

Steve’s hand dropped, his eyes suddenly glued to the bright yellow peeking out from behind Eddie’s back.

“Are you done trying to attack me?” Eddie said somewhat hesitantly, like he half expected Steve to push him against the door again and strip him down.

The thought was appealing, but not during school hours.

Steve rolled his eyes, but stepped away, giving Eddie a few inches of space to move away from the door.

When he pulled the bouquet from behind him, Steve gasped.

Sunflowers and daisies amongst wildflowers, a piece of twine holding them together, almost like Eddie had put it together himself.

“There’s that flower shop on the way here that lets you customize the bouquets, and the sunflowers were right in the window. Had to get some for my sunshine,” Eddie said, simple as that.

Like it would’ve taken more effort to pass by the flower shop and not stop.

Steve bit his lip as he took the bouquet of flowers from him, tears welling up in his eyes.

He realized that besides the time Robin got him flowers to celebrate his graduation, he’d never received any from anyone.

And it wasn’t even that Eddie had just grabbed any bouquet he could at the store; He’d made this combination himself, used the colors of the sun and light and turned it into a visual representation of their love. Just for Steve. Just to make Steve’s day brighter, to make him feel special.

A tear fell as he pulled the bouquet up to his face, breathing in the fresh scent of each flower.

Eddie’s palm cupped his cheek, his thumb wiping away a tear before it could drip all the way down his face.

“What’s wrong, sunshine? Should I not have brought them?”

“No!” Steve hugged them gently to his chest. “No, they’re beautiful. I love them. I love you.”

“Are you sure? I won’t be upset if you don’t like them.”

“I promise I love them. They’re perfect.”

Steve placed a soft kiss to Eddie’s lips before pulling away.

“I think I have a mug from a student somewhere I can fill with water and put them in until I get home.”

Steve was so busy searching his cabinets behind his desk, he didn’t hear the soft knock at the door followed by it opening.

“Oh! Sorry. I forgot it was your lunch break, Mr. H.”

Will.

He turned around and watched as Eddie scooted away so Will could come closer.

“No need to apologize, Will. We didn’t have an appointment I forgot about, did we?”

“No. Just uh. Wanted to tell you something. I can come back later.”

He started to back out of the door, then Eddie spoke.

“Will? The Will who drew the sunshine?”

Will looked at Eddie, eyes squinting, probably trying to figure out how he knew that.

“Yeah.”

“Dude! That was one of the best pieces I’ve ever tattooed.”

Will’s eyes widened and his mouth opened in shock.

“Wait, you’re the one who did it?”

Eddie nodded, huge smile lighting up his face and the room.

Steve stood behind his desk watching. Will was an extremely shy kid, so he wanted to see how this played out.

“Yeah! I just hope I got the spirit of it in there. Sometimes it’s hard to put into it what the original artist did, but it helped that I had a good canvas,” Eddie nodded towards Steve.

“It’s so good! You made the colors pop so well against his skin. And the way you followed the same lines, but made them blend more? I tried copying that with a painting and it got me an A!”

Steve didn’t think he could love Eddie more. But now, watching him interact with his favorite student? Not just interact, but bring him out of his shell? He would marry him on the spot.

“That’s incredible! Mr. H says you’re quite the artist.”

Will was blushing, looking down at his feet, suddenly shy again.

“I’m okay.”

“Okay?! I think you’ll have to let me be the judge of that,” Eddie turned to Steve with his arms crossed over his chest. “How do I get in touch with his agent? I’d like to see his portfolio.”

“I don’t have an agent, and my portfolio is actually why I came to talk to Mr. H,” Will managed to say after he let a giggle slip.

Eddie was good at this, at being the calming presence in the room, fitting in anywhere, making sure everyone felt seen and heard.

“Is everything okay with your portfolio? You still have a month until the deadline if you’re worried about that. I even finished the counselor check-in portion yesterday, so it should be good to go.”

Eddie watched from the side, eyes darting between Will and Steve.

“Everything’s fine. I mean, hopefully. It’s just that the fee for the portfolio evaluation is due by Friday and my mom is trying to see if they could extend until next Friday when she gets paid? Do you know if they do that?”

Will looked like he was going to cry, and Steve knew if he cried, Steve would cry.

“How much is it?” Eddie asked, trying to appear casual, but Steve knew. He already knew that Eddie’s big heart wasn’t going to let this kid get a setback like this.

“It’s $200. My mom’s been trying to save, but she just had to get a new tire for the car so it set her behind. If they can just extend it a week, we can do it.”

“This is for your future right? So you can focus on your art more?”

“Yes, sir. I’m applying for a scholarship to an art school next year. I would meet the requirements for their grants for tuition if I get in, but the application fees and portfolio review fees are still due.”

Eddie looked over at Steve, silently asking him for permission to do what Steve knew he was going to do the second he started asking questions. He knew Joyce would insist on paying him back, but if it meant taking a bit of stress off of her and Will, he wasn’t going to stop Eddie. He gave him a quick nod.

Eddie got a bit closer to Will, still not within touching distance, but close enough to keep his voice low.

“I think I’d really like to pay for your portfolio review fees. Should I give the money to you or Mr. H?” Eddie asked as he got his wallet out of his back pocket.

“What? You can’t. You don’t even know me! You’ve never seen my art!” Will exclaimed in disbelief.

“That isn’t true. I’ve tattooed your art on someone, and I feel like I know you a little because Mr. H talks about you so much.”

“I can’t take your money.”

“It’s not taking it! I’m expecting you to work hard for it. I want you to design my next tattoo. Consider this your payment. Deal?”

Eddie was so good.

Steve didn’t know what he did to deserve this man, but he would do everything he could to keep him.

“Is that allowed?” Will asked Steve, his tone hopeful.

“It’s allowed if you want it to be.”

Will was thinking about it, his hands nervously tapping against his legs as he looked between Eddie and Steve.

But then he looked at Eddie, and he let out a sob, and fell into him, Eddie’s arms quickly going around him to keep himself upright.

Eddie was looking at Steve, panic written all over his face, probably not used to the emotions of kids. Steve gave him a gentle smile, letting him know that it was okay, that Will was probably just incredibly relieved and happy.

So Eddie let himself relax and hug Will back properly. Steve set the flowers down, deciding the mug would just have to wait. This was a moment he didn’t want to miss a second of.

He could hear Will saying “thank you” over and over into Eddie’s chest and Eddie just repeating “you deserve it, kiddo” back to him.

Will finally calmed down after a couple of minutes, pulling away suddenly to wipe at his tears and clear his throat.

“Alright, bud?” Steve asked, grabbing his box of tissues off his desk and walking over to hand it to him so he could wipe his face.

Will snagged a few from the box, wiping his eyes and then blowing his nose, face turning red when he realized how loud it was.

“I’m good. Sorry. I think I got snot on your shirt,” he said to Eddie, who just shrugged and gave him a smile.

“Not the worst thing I’ve had on my shirt. I can change when I get to the car.”

“You don’t have to do this, really. We can figure something out.”

“I want to. And I want a tattoo designed by you so I can match with Stevie here,” Eddie smirked, then realized this was one of Steve’s students. He was Mr. H to them. “Sorry, Mr. H.”

Then it suddenly dawned on Will what he may have interrupted.

He glanced at the flowers, then at Eddie.

“Oh! Oh my God! I’m so sorry. Were you gonna have lunch together? Like a date? I just ruined a date didn’t I?” He shoved his face in his hands, but Steve quickly pulled them away.

“No! Eddie just surprised me with a quick visit, that’s all.”

“Are you…”

“Are we…”

“Boyfriends?”

Eddie snorted and Steve rolled his eyes at him, crossing his arms and leaning against his desk.

“Yes, we are.”

“Oh. That’s good. Mr. H deserves someone like you.”

Well, what the fuck was Steve gonna do with that? Cry, probably.

He wouldn’t in front of Will though, especially not after his emotional visit to his office. He held it in, but he could tell Eddie saw how hard it was for him not to break down in tears.

“He sure does. I hope I can be what he deserves for a long time,” Eddie said, adding to Steve’s emotional turmoil.

“Alright, enough trying to make me cry! Will, I’ll send in the money for you, okay? Just tell your mom it’s been taken care of. Eddie, you have work to get to. Let me have a little cry in peace.”

Steve started to shoo them out, but Eddie leaned in to give him a quick peck on the cheek first.

“Love you, sunshine!”

“Love you back.”

He’d never get tired of this.

———————

He should have known things couldn’t go perfectly for the day.

When school got out, he sent a quick text to Eddie to let him know he had about an hour of paperwork and then he would head home, change, and grab their dinner.

Does your client want me to grab anything?

He didn’t get an answer immediately, but he didn’t expect to. He knew when Eddie had the gloves on, he couldn’t touch anything else unless it was an emergency.

But finally, right before he left his office, Eddie responded.

No he’s good thx

So he followed his plan. He went home, changed, managed to text Robin a few emojis when he saw she hadn’t made it back to the apartment yet.

But then his phone rang.

Thinking it was Robin responding to his texts with a call instead, he answered without looking.

“Robs, you can’t come for me about my boyfriend when you’re out here sleeping with-”

“Steven.”

That was not Robin. That was definitely Richard Harrington.

He hadn’t heard from him in years. He wasn’t even sure how he got this number.

“Dad.”

Meet him with the same barely civil shortness he’d given Steve for most of his life, that would be what gets him through this conversation in one piece.

“You have a boyfriend?”

“I do.”

“Is it serious?”

“Would it matter to you if it was?”

He didn’t want his dad’s grubby hands anywhere near Eddie, and if it meant keeping him a secret, he would.

Richard cleared his throat before continuing.

++++++++++++++++++

“I’m only calling because your mother insisted.”

Well, that couldn’t be good.

“A response is often polite so the person on the phone understands they can continue speaking, Steven.”

“Oh, my apologies, I forgot how talking on the phone works.”

“You don’t need to be rude.”

“What does mom need you to tell me?”

“She’s sick. Breast cancer. It’s still early, only stage two according to the doctor. She’ll have surgery next week and a few months of treatment and should be fine. I told her calling you was a waste of time, but she-”

“Does she need anything from me?”

“No, don’t worry, she isn’t requesting your presence.”

Steve knew he should be more upset, more worried, maybe even more angry that his dad was choosing to tell him this with such an attitude.

But all he could feel was relief that he didn’t have to visit.

And maybe some guilt that that was all he felt.

“Well, are you going to wish her well?”

“I will when I call her.”

“Oh, so you do know how to do that?”

It stung. The words hit him in the chest.

He spent his entire adolescence and young adulthood waiting for a phone call from them while they traveled, any word at all about when they’d be back or to say goodnight to him or just to see if he was alive.

And now his father acted like he was an awful son for not calling the parents who didn’t support anything he did?

He bit back the tears he could feel pooling, not wanting to give his father any advantage over this conversation.

“I sure do. I had to teach myself though since you didn’t seem to learn until recently.”

That shut Richard up.

Good>

“Anyway. I have to get dinner for my boyfriend. Hopefully I won’t be talking to you again anytime soon. Bye!”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When he hung up, he let out a sob and quickly sent a text to Eddie to let him know he was on his way to get pizza.

He didn’t have time to be upset, or even really think about what his dad said. He had to get pizza and get to his sunshine.

—----------------------

When he got to the shop, Eddie was wrapping up with his client.

“There he is! Eddie hasn’t shut up about you, man!”

Steve blushed as he set the boxes down on the counter and walked over to them at Eddie’s chair.

“Shut up, I’ve barely even said a damn thing,” he said as he handed over the usual care instructions, though from the look of this guy, he’d had plenty of experience. “Hey, sunshine. Doing okay?”

Steve leaned over and kissed his cheek.

“I’m okay. How’s the session been?”

“He tortured me the whole time. I begged him to stop and he wouldn’t.”

“Sounds about right,” Steve agreed.

“Name’s Ian,” the guy said as he held his hand out to shake Steve’s.

“Steve. Nice to meet you.”

Steve was trying to be polite and smile like you do when you meet new people, but he was exhausted, and he was kind of hoping that he could just hide in the back with the pizza until Eddie was ready to leave.

“I’ll get out of your hair. Thanks again, Eddie, looks great. Got an opening in a couple months I can steal?”

“I always have a spot for ya. Just text me.”

“You got it.” Ian turned to Steve and smiled. “Have a nice night, Steve.”

“You too.”

Ian left and Eddie was immediately on him, hands on his cheeks, concerned eyes boring into his.

“What happened, sweetheart?”

“I don’t really wanna talk about it. Can we just go home?”

Steve knew it wouldn’t work for long, if at all, but he really didn’t wanna have a breakdown in Eddie’s place of business.

“Okay. Let me clean up and we can go,” Eddie leaned in to kiss his lips softly.

Eddie started disposing of the ink and paper towels, the tattoo gun already taken care of and back in the cabinet.

Steve thought about what might make him feel better. Being with Eddie would for sure, eventually talking about it probably would, but he needed to do something else.

“Can you give me a tattoo?”

Eddie’s head spun around from where he was wiping down the chair.

“What? Now?”

“Yeah. Just a little one.”

“Sunshine, that might not be a good idea. It seems like something happened that upset you and I don’t think you should get a permanent thing to feel temporarily better.”

He was smart, obviously. That’s one of the reasons Steve loved him.

But he wanted to make a reckless mistake. So much of his life had been spent being smart, making decisions that would keep him safe.

“I know it sounds like that. But I wanted this for a while anyway.”

“What is it?”

“I want a small robin on my arm.”

Eddie’s face softened, his frown turning into a smile.

“A robin, huh?”

Steve nodded.

“You’re sure?”

Steve nodded again.

“Alright, hop up. I’ll get everything prepped. You want pizza first?”

“No, not that hungry.”

Eddie kissed his forehead.

“Mkay. Where’s it going?”

Steve took his shirt off and pointed to his shoulder.

“Gonna hurt there, sweetheart.”

“I can handle it.”

Eddie didn’t respond, just continued getting everything ready for his impromptu tattoo.

He didn’t think about it as Eddie left to sketch and print a robin. It was simple, small, just something to remind Steve of the most important person in his life.

He loved what Eddie came up with, and he settled as Eddie got started.

It did hurt. It hurt much worse than his wrist, even with the simple lines.

But with the pain, he found himself finding pleasure too.

The tattoo gun pressed into his skin, but Eddie’s hand was holding it still in his firm grip. The needles made him bleed, but Eddie’s whispered words stitched the wounds.

He knew he was sinking, and he knew he was hard.

But this time he knew what was happening and he knew what he could do to get through it.

He knew Eddie would get him through it.

He relaxed into it, letting out small whimpers when Eddie’s other hand brushed gently against his skin.

The back and forth, the hard and soft, the rough and gentle.

It all made Steve feel like he wanted to be on his knees.

“Sweet thing, can you look at me?”

Yeah, he could do that.

His glassy eyes looked over at Eddie, who was taking off his gloves and turning the tattoo gun off.

“You’ve been so good for me, sweet thing. Wanna look in the mirror?”

“Mhm.”

Eddie helped him get up and walk the few steps it took to stand in front of the full length mirror hanging on the wall.

“How’s it look?”

Steve took a deep breath so he could focus. He did want to see this, appreciate it.

Then he’d appreciate Eddie.

It was beautiful, of course. Eddie had drawn it simple, the way Steve wanted, but had included small details like making the wing a similar color to Robin’s eyes after looking at a picture of her for a few seconds.

He leaned over to kiss Eddie, wordlessly thanking him for what he did.

Then he sank to his knees and leaned his forehead against Eddie’s hip bone.

“Sunshine? You okay?”

“Mhm. Want you.”

“Right now?”

He sounded shocked that Steve could possibly want him now, as if he hadn’t been thinking of this since his first tattoo before he even properly knew him.

“Please.”

Steve looked up at him, eyes wide and lips parted, sending the message that he needed Eddie in his mouth immediately.

“You wanna suck me, sweet thing?”

Eddie’s hand ran through his hair, gripping the ends as if he wanted to tug, but was waiting for a confirmation from Steve that he could.

Steve nodded once, closing his eyes when he felt Eddie’s fingers tighten and pull his head back.

“So pretty on your knees for me. Love seeing you so desperate,” Eddie leaned down to lick into his mouth filthily, sucking his tongue between his lips and letting out a laugh when Steve moaned. “Think you can keep your hands to yourself?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Keep them behind you, sweet thing.”

Steve immediately moved them behind his back, locking them together so he could resist the urge to touch every inch of Eddie.

Eddie pulled back, unbuttoning his jeans as he did. He pulled his waistband down just enough to pull out his cock, working his wrist up and down the length right in front of Steve’s mouth, teasing him.

“Being so good, waiting for me to give you permission. You want a taste?”

“Yes, yes, yes,” Steve couldn’t hold back how much he wanted him, his taste, his smell. Everything.

Eddie pushed his cock against Steve’s lips, just barely letting the tip leak onto his mouth.

God, it was good.

Steve wanted more.

He whined, words lost to the sensation of Eddie being so close but so far, his control keeping Steve still.

“Might have to buy you some lipstick sometime, see how my cock looks with red lipstick stains around it.”

Steve groaned, closing his eyes and picturing what that would look like, what he would look like.

“You like that, sweetheart? Want me to buy you some lipstick? Wear it when you want to be on your knees for me?”

Steve couldn’t answer, couldn’t even nod. His brain wasn’t connected to his body anymore, but Eddie knew.

“That’s it, sunshine.” Eddie tugged his head back slightly, forcing his mouth open wider. “Open up for me. You can have it.”

So he did.

He let Eddie feed his cock into his mouth slowly, swallowing every inch like he was starving for more. He’d never had much of a gag reflex, but Eddie was big, and he knew if he pushed all the way, he’d be choking.

He wanted that.

He opened wider, letting his tongue run along the bottom of Eddie’s cock as he pushed the last inch in.

He was in his throat.

Steve gagged, but he chased Eddie when he started to pull out.

“Oh, you like that? Wanna choke on it?”

Eddie’s voice was rough, raspy in a way he’d only heard it when he was first waking up. Steve loved it.

He nodded as Eddie slowly pushed in again, pausing halfway to tilt Steve’s chin up to look at him.

He was sure he made quite a sight.

“Tap on my leg three times if you need to stop. That’s your red when you can’t talk, okay?”

Steve nodded.

“Tap once for green. What’s your color, sweet thing?”

He tapped once.

Eddie pushed in the rest of the way, causing Steve to gag, drool dripping down his chin and making a mess.

Eddie loved it, though, he could tell.

Steve moved his head up and down a couple of times, letting himself slowly enjoy the taste and rhythm.

But Eddie didn’t want him to be in charge, and neither did Steve.

Eddie’s hands were at the back of his head, fingers wrapped in his hair. He pulled Steve back, then pushed him forward, fucking Steve’s mouth slowly but deeply.

He breathed through his nose, moaning around the cock hitting the back of his throat, pushing against his tongue.

Eddie quickened his pace, pushing in and pulling out faster than Steve could keep up with.

His mouth was wide open, barely even closing around his cock now, just letting drool fall on the floor, run down Eddie’s cock, mess up his pants.

He was so hard. He knew if Eddie kept this up for much longer, he’d cum in his pants.

One particularly deep thrust, made Steve choke around him, tears welling up and quickly falling from his eyes.

“So beautiful like this, Stevie. Love you so much.”

That was all it took.

Steve felt the sticky wetness in his boxers, already making his jeans uncomfortable.

Eddie looked down to see Steve’s completely blissed out face, saw the dark spot now on the front of his jeans, and let out a long moan.

“Fuck, sweetheart. So perfect for me. Gonna cum in your mouth so you can taste it, just like you wanted,” Eddie was rambling, but it just made Steve wish he could do this all night.

But he could feel Eddie’s hips stutter, the rhythm getting lost to the pleasure.

Steve let out a whimper, muffled by Eddie’s cock sinking in as deep as he could go.

His cum flooded Steve’s throat and mouth, dripping back out with the drool still falling from the corners of his mouth.

He moaned as Eddie pulled out so he could swallow, the taste musky and salty, but exactly what he wanted.

When Eddie slowly pulled out all the way, Steve stuck his tongue out so he could try to lap up any leftover cum on his cock, but Eddie pulled his head away.

“Too sensitive, sweet thing. You made me feel too good,” he praised.

Steve could feel himself smiling, proud that he was able to give this to him, proud that he could do something right.

“Color?”

“Green.”

“Good boy. Gonna help you sit on the chair so I can grab something to clean us up.”

He managed to get Steve up, settling him in the chair with a kiss to his nose, smiling when Steve giggled.

“Love seeing you so happy, sunshine.”

Steve loved being this happy, loved that he had so many reasons to be this happy.

Eddie grabbed the paper towels from his table, wetting a couple at the sink next to it, and wiping himself first so he could button his pants back up.

“You got us pretty messy, sweetheart.”

“Sorry,” Steve said.

He wasn’t though. He’d never been able to be messy like this before, and he certainly had never been given so much attention and care after a blowjob.

Eddie was giving him everything he needed, even things he didn’t know he needed.

“Sunshine? Doing okay?”

“Mhm.”

He was. He was way better than okay.

Chapter 10

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[starlightshore]

Fhfjdj Ghost Siffrin is struggling not to kill Loop... Love fails! 💔 /comical

[la-pheacienne]

Can someone please explain to me what "soft feminine power" is? This is not a rhetoric question and I'm not being ironic, I genuinely do not know what that means. In my language we don't have the equivalent of this. There is no feminine or masculine power, there is only power, either you have it or you don't. If you are a woman in a patriarchal society you can gain power up to a certain level by using """""feminine""""" means, but that's not "soft feminine power" that's literally victimized, restrained women trying to survive with the means that they have left. It's not something one should glamorize or wish for. It is just a reality for some women. When Barbara Stanwyck in Baby Face, a woman forced to prostitute herself by her father since she was 14 yo finally gets away from him and starts having sex with men for her own profit and to forward her own interests in order to climb the social hierarchy, that's not "soft feminine power". That is what a woman had to do to survive. She sold her looks and her body and her nice words, she manipulated men and used them in every possible way in order to gain power, and she did. She didn't start a feminist revolution, no, she didn't take a gun. But there is nothing "soft" here, this is the very opposite of soft. This is an extremely determined person who is resilient and hard as a rock and cuts through life like a razor. There is nothing inherently feminine in this either. It's something that women had to do because of patriarchy yes, but it is not a "feminine" trait. What about all these men that sell sex to survive, because they are homeless or underage or immigrants or very weak for whatever reason? If you are at the bottom of the social ladder and don't have any direct power to do absolutely anything to improve your circumstances then you have got to find other indirect ways to do that and you need to use manipulation and exploit yourself and your looks in order to survive. It is a necessity. It is not hashtag soft feminine power. It is not something to wish for especially today in the sense that, oh, actually I don't want to be direct and forward with what I want and what I believe I deserve, I prefer using my "soft feminine power" instead. You don't know what the fuck you are talking about. "A lady's armour is courtesy" is not something that should be even remotely associated with hashtag "soft feminine power". It's just what Sansa has been told from birth and it's the only thing she values about herself or others. Our problem with Sansa isn't that we dislike "soft feminine power" it's that she was a bully and painfully superficial and self-absorbed and reactive and her vices as a character were one of the factors that caused the horrible ending of the first book and nothing about this is even remotely "soft" or "feminine" or "powerful" or even close to getting her any form of actual power. It is literally not about that. I want Sansa to actually grow as a person and her arc is already about that and her journey in KL was very important and kudos for her because she managed to survive but people's dislike on her has nothing to do with the fact that she keeps her "femininity" but for the particularly negative role she played in the narrative of the first book and the fact that apart from surviving, she hasn't offered much thematically or narratively, yet.

My point is, the phrase "soft feminine power" literally has no meaning and is either used to 1) glamorize the struggles of marginalized individuals to survive or 2) conceal actual character flaws like lack of backbone or extreme conformism.

[johnslittlespoon]

Tough And Sweet (Like You And Me)

Ch. 5/? – 'August, Honey, You Were Mine'

[WC: 60K | Gale Cleven/John Egan, College AU, The Bikeriders AU, Age Gap, Emotional Slowburn, Hurt/Comfort, Set in 2005]

College student John Egan ends up in an old pub on the other side of his small town, where he has a chance encounter with biker and mechanic Gale Cleven. Unconventional circumstances be damned, John is a lovesick fool.

[AO3 LINK]

[ssreeder]

You changed your pfp 👀👀??

I DID!!!!!!! I wanted a change & I think it suits me better I mean….

LOOK AT HIM!!!!!

[black-and-yellow]

Stupid doodles I did because I couldn't get them out of my head