#what a privilege 😞😞😞😞

[babieken]

This view >>>

[sttoru]

Trueform sukuna who never kisses his concubines. EXCEPT he only kisses his favorite concubine aka reader 😞🎀

𝝑𝑒 synopsis. you’re the only one deserving of lord sukuna’s.. direct affection.

tags. true form!sukuna x concubine!reader. fluff, suggestive at most. uhh exhibitionism ? kinda but nothing crazy sexual happens, so pda. size difference. reader gets called ‘doll.’

you’re standing at the entrance of the estate, along with some other concubines. four of them. uraume is there with you as well. you’re all awaiting the one person you’re serving; ryomen sukuna.

it’s silent. the women don’t dare to speak up nor do they dare address you in a menacing manner because of uraume’s presence. you’re thankful for them. you really don’t want to have another petty fight with the concubines. not before your little trip to the village nearby.

you’re all accompanying sukuna to meet up with an infamous clan leader. it’s official business, but you’re needed as a sign of your lord’s high status. you’re basically his trophies that he likes to show off.

“interesting choice of clothing,” sukuna finally shows up. you all bow, showing respect. you look up and only then realise that he’s addressing you. his eyes wander over your figure, “who’s chosen that for you?”

you glance down at your kimono. it’s a beautiful red—suiting the color of sukuna’s eyes. your hair is put up in a neat bun, with a matching crimson hairpin that represented who you belong to.

him.

“my lady-in-waiting, my lord,” you say quietly. you cannot see it, yet can easily feel it; the jealous glares from the four women. they’re dressed in the exact same color red, yet their lord hasn’t paid them any mind. not even a glance.

sukuna just hums in response and makes a mental note of your answer. at least his human servants are good for something. he continues to shamelessly check you out.

“lord sukuna,” uraume interrupts carefully. they bow their head once the king of curses looks their way with a stoic expression, “we’ll have to leave now if we wish to make it there at dawn.”

it’s a gentle reminder, but there’s some urgency in their voice. sukuna rolls his eyes—he may have some official business, but he’s not attending that. not before taking care of other more important stuff first. “silence,” he comments to uraume, heavy steps heading your way afterwards.

your eyes meet his. you blink in confusion, eyelashes fluttering. the sight makes sukuna’s hands twitch at his sides. the way you stare up at him with such naïveté is making him want to destroy it.

you’re unsure what sukuna wants from you. as he orders, everyone stays quiet. you watch as his big hands wrap around your body—your waist engulfed by his warm palms. your eyes widen, but before you can question his actions, your lips are sealed by his.

it’s rare that he does this. kissing sukuna is a privilege. one that no one has ever gotten the honour of having, except for you.

you’ve tasted him. you’ve felt his tongue slither against yours. you’ve had his saliva mix with yours. you’ve had him grunting in your mouth.

you’ve had it all.

no one says a thing. even as your feet are lifted from the ground by the sheer strength of sukuna’s grip on your small body. to reach his lips properly, he has to pick you up and hold you against his chest. it’s his favorite thing to do.

“pretty thing,” sukuna coos with a grin. you can feel his lips curling up menacingly against your mouth. it makes you whine. you instantly shut up once you realise that you’re still outside and surrounded by others—who are basically waiting on you two to be done.

you’re embarrassed to the point that you want nothing more than to hide your face against sukuna’s chest. but he will not let you until he’s had his fill. your tongues swirl around each other passionately, followed by him sucking on your bottom lip and biting it with his sharp fangs.

“my lord,” you whine quietly. you know this’ll end up like that one time in the garden. where he shamelessly took you in front of his servants. you’re unsure if it’s a smart thing to do right now. sukuna has an appointment to go to after all.

his mouth doesn’t stop interlocking with yours. his thick fingers tug at the hairs on the back of your neck, causing you to part your lips in surprise. the king of curses takes his chance and explores your warm little mouth. the one that he’s claimed as his the moment you became his concubine.

you tug at his sleeve as a reminder. sukuna grumbles in annoyance, but he knows you’re right; he should let go. his bottom set of eyes dart over to uraume for a second and upon seeing their expressionless yet determined face, he sighs.

all that official business can suck his dick.

sukuna finally detaches his lips from your now wet and swollen ones. you’re breathing hard, trying to catch your breath. you’re flustered to the point you actually bury your face into sukuna’s chiseled chest. you’re sure this’ll be the only talk around the estate for the upcoming week. you’ll become the victim of some more. . . bullying.

the king of curses notices that you don’t let go of him at all. he grins at the sight of you so desperately clinging onto him. he tries to undo the little mess he made of your once neat hair in the meantime.

“what? want me to carry you all the way there, doll?” sukuna raises an eyebrow, teasing you as per usual. you don’t let go of him since you’re still cooling off. you’ve never really kissed outside of the bedroom. it always happens behind closed doors, so this one time took you by surprise.

you shake your head and plop down on your feet again. “no, my apologies, my lord,” you straighten the material of your kimono and don’t even dare to look at the others. uraume would understand, since they’re used to their lord’s antics, but the concubines will cause big trouble once you’re back home.

sukuna nods in acknowledgment. he still got that evil smirk on his face. his thumb brushes the smudged lipstick from the corner of your mouth, cleaning up his mess once again. he’s nice enough to do so today.

“heh.” sukuna lets out an amused chuckle before walking away and ahead of you—the others silently following, as do you. you’re right behind him, on his right side, as he turns his head to yours, “just so y’know, i’m not done with you.”

you know sukuna isn’t. you can easily tell by the way that he didn’t even bother to wipe the lipstick from his own lips. he’s wearing that stain like it’s a medal of sorts. evidence that you’re the only one he’s ever going to show such affection to.

either way; you’re in for one hell of a ride once you’re back from your little business trip.

[lewisvinga]

awooga | max verstappen x fem! wolff! reader

summary; in which y/n thinks she’s fawning over her boyfriend on her priv, until she realized she just exposed her relationship on her public account

fc; erika hasseur

warnings; suggestive comments, cursing

taglist; @namgification @louvrepool @locelscs @thehufflepuffavenger1 @minseok-smaus @goldenmclaren @ollieshifts @lavisenri @graciewrote @xoscar03 @c-losur3

note; requested ! awooga is so funny

masterlist !

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

liked by maxverstappen1, yourbestfriend, and others !

yourusername: AWOOOOGA🤤 i wish i can post him on the main all the time looooook at him😩 but i guess i’ll stay on the priv😔😔😔

yourusername: i wanna sit on those thighs tho

yourusername: imma call him, make him my booty call🥴

username: HELPOAKDKSND

username: uhm…..

username: HOLD AWNNNN

username: does toto know??😃😃

yourbestfriend: oh,,,, girl…..

yourusername: i am just a girl thirsty n horny for her bf on her priv😪😪😪

yourbestfriend: that’s the thing… it’s not your priv

username: she doesn’t realize this is her public account IJBOL

username: MAX??? MAX VERSTAPPEN???

maxverstappen1: wrong account, schat, wrong account !

yourusername: oh!

mercedesamgf1: answer the phone, now. - toto

yourusername: oh fuck

this post has been deleted !

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

liked by maxverstappen1, lewishamilton, and others !

yourusername: uhm…. anyways! photo dump w my boyf

tagged; maxverstappen1

maxverstappen1: pls stop calling me ur boyf on the main im scared ur dad will find me.

mercedesamgf1: count your days, verstappen. - toto

yourusername: who gaf what he thinks ur my sexy boyf AWOOGA🤤🤤

georgerussell63: pls stop saying awooga it hurts

maxverstappen1: ur jealous 😂🫵🫵

username: she’s so chill abt accidentally leaking her relationship 😭

username: shes winning the idgaf war

username: off topic but her fits are always😍

username: how did toto and susie react pls tell🤔

yourusername: well susie was amazing! love herrrrrrr🩷🩷🩷🩷

yourusername: my father on the other hand…… let’s just say if we were on the paddock no headphones would’ve been safe 😆😆

mercedesamgf1: was not happy. - toto

yourusername: pls for the love of God make an instagram account i’d be soooo good at managing it!!!😞😞😞

mercedesamgf1: leave max then. - toto

yourusername: then no🙄🙄🙄

maxverstappen1: i was threatened a lot 😄😄

lewishamilton: well! that’s something !

yourusername: look away, lewis, look away

lewishamilton: i’m afraid your roscoe privileges are revoked

yourusername: NO PLEASE NOT MY ROSCOE😭💔💔 i know max has cats but please 😔

maxverstappen1: guess i’ll have to make y/n a cat person now😁

lewishamilton: anyways! roscoe needs a babysitter this monday!😆

yourusername: I’M IN!!

username: NOO LEWIS AND TOTOS COMMENTS ARE SENDING MEE😭😭😭😭

username: y/n ur so real for saying awooga to max😩

yourusername: have you SEEN those thighs? AWOOOGA

yourusername: i’m afraid i cannot speak on his thighs any further 🥴🥴🥴🥴

georgerussell63: STOPPP

charles_leclerc: please stop we have children here

oscarpiastri: 😨😨😨

maxverstappen1: the lady can say whatever she wants! 🙄🙄

mercedesamgf1: no she cannot. not when it’s about you. - toto

maxverstappen1: you’re so right, sir! sorry about that, mr. wolff!🤗🤗

yourusername: oh nah my dad got mad max scared asf of him

maxverstappen1: his threats are working, schat, help….😰

[hangup119]

when pigs fly ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ

you will only admit that you actually like kim leehan when pigs start to fly. for now, though, everyone else will just have to suffer the push-and-pull that happens whenever the two of you are near each other's vicinity.

or: your younger brother invites you to join his minecraft server, and chaos ensues.

pairing. gamer!kim leehan + fem!reader

genres + warnings. non-idol au, streamer au, gamer au, rivals to lovers(?), brother’s best friend(?) | profanity, sexual jokes, violent jokes, not rly r2l more like u-piss-me-off-but-u-dgaf2lovers HAHA i do not know what i am doing..., y/n is hard to get!!! or is she... 😈, woonhak and jaehyun just want to become the next big mc content creators but thats not possible when u arent the main character i fear😞

status. on-going | taglist. open | networks. @onedoornet

author’s note. this is completely inspired from the awesome @lionhanie’s bnd playing mc headcanons 🫡 plz show them some support bc this smau wouldn’t be here today if not for it 😿 ANYWAYS FIRST BND WORK LESGOO ( REBLOGS APPRECIATED <3 )

main story ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ

crossover

profiles one | two

01 #needthat

02 woonagi OUT 🔥

03 female acquired 🙏😎

04 day 1

05 𝓲’𝓶 𝓰𝓸𝓷𝓷𝓪 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶

06 your worst nightmare

07 he’s right behind me isn’t he

08 pretty privilege at its finest

. . . & more to come!

[theyluvkarolina]

౨ৎ APPLE OF MY EYE ౨ৎ

masterlist / rules / requests & talks with me!

SUMMARY౨ৎ fernando loves his little girl. and he isn’t afraid to show that. from her first time in the garage, to her first ever football game. Best of all? Everyone loves girl-dad fernando!! (a smau compilation of fernando, you, and camila 🩵) requested!

PAIRING ౨ৎ Fernando Alonso x Wife!Reader

WARNINGS ౨ৎ none! super fluffy 🩵 (fernando types like a dad, i don’t make the rules) VERY SHORT!

A/N ౨ৎ little camila has been converted into a oc at this point?? i mean she’s been in not one but 2 fernando fics already. unintentionally created a oc haha

PART 1: `` ౨ৎ SECRET IS OUT ౨ৎ `` ,

EXTRA: `` ౨ৎSLIPPING THROUGH MY FINGERS౨ৎ ``

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM, DECEMBER 2023

y/n_l/n & fernandoalo_offical have made a new post!

liked by astonmartinf1, lace_stroll, carlossainz55, and others

y/n_l/n a little someone is done cooking… welcome to the world Camila 🎀

1,396 comments

user1 OMG IT HAPPENED 🥹🥹

user2 CAMILA L/N-ALONSO HAS BEEN BORN

user3 project verstappen is a go.

→ user4 project verstappen??? more like project alonso 🗣️

→ user5 OOOHH FERNANDO ALONSO!!! 🗣️🔥

f1 ✔︎ the young rookie finally has his own young one! Congratulations you two! Can’t wait to see her in the garage! 🏁

francisca.cgomes ✔︎ AHHH SHE’S SO CUTE! CAN’T WAIT TO MEET HER 🩷

y/n_l/n all doors are open for you 😚

landonorris ✔︎ papaya fan in the making? 👀🍊

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ no! 🎉 🎊 🎈

→ oscarpiastri ✔︎ that’s a orange

→ landonorris ✔︎ no shit sherlock

astonmartinf1 ✔︎ Congratulations to our new crew member! 😊

→ y/n_l/n 💚

estebanocon ✔︎ glad to know that Lance didn’t spoil this one!

→ lance_stroll ✔︎ haha funny. 🫤

oscarpiastri ✔︎ seems i won’t be the youngest on the grid anymore 😅

→ y/n_l/n don’t worry oscar, you’re still my adopted son 🫂

→ oscarpiastri ✔︎ good to know 🙃

→ landonorris ✔︎ what about me @ y/n_l/n??? 🤨

→ y/n_l/n you’ve been demoted since you helped lance leak my baby shower 😒

→ landonorris ✔︎ I SAID SORRY

→ y/n_l/n apology NOT accepted

maxverstappen1 ✔︎ …are toy donations still up for grabs?

→ kellypiquet ✔︎ …Max? 🤨

→ maxverstappen1 ✔︎ you saw nothing.

lilymunihe ✔︎ officially a milf???

→ y/n_l/n hell yeah 😍😍😋

TWITTER, 2026

INSTAGRAM, FUTURE (2026)

fernandoalo_offical ✔︎

liked by y/n_l/n, landonorris, charles_leclerc, and others

fernandoalo_offical Camila’s first race! Everything's better with loved ones in the garage ❤️

tagged; y/n_l/n

2,348 comments

y/n_l/n @ landonorris why are you bribing my child with hats 🤨

→ landonorris ✔︎ those are very bold accusations you’re throwing Mrs. L/N-Alonso 🤔

→ y/n_l/n then why did she come home saying mclaren is the best??

→ landonorris ✔︎ ….ask oscar?

→ y/n_l/n you lost babysitting privileges.

→ oscarpiastri ✔︎ gotta show her the better team 🤷

→ y/n_l/n YOU LOST THEM TOO. KIKA AND LILY ARE NOW IN CHARGE.

→ francisca.cgomes ✔︎ yes ma’am. 😳

→ lilymunihe ✔︎ yay!

→ lilyzneimer yay!

→ lilymunihe ✔︎ …🤨 @ lilyzneimer

→ lilyzneimer …🤨 @ lilymunihe

user6 MOM IS BACK IN THE PADDOCK!!

user7 i love how fernando just posts his family instead of anythin team related 😭

→ astionmartinf1 ✔︎ still waiting to be seen 😞👊

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ the wife and camila come first ❤️

→ y/n_l/n as it should :)

fernandoalo_offical ✔︎

liked by fernandoalonso, francisca.cgomes, kellypiquet, and others

y/n_l/n quick late summer break :)

tagged; fernandoalonso

3,208 comments

user8 DILF!! DILF!! DILF!! 📢‼🚨🚨📣🗣🗣⚠️

user9 my dilf senses are tingling 🤤

user10 PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT FERNANDO WHAT ABOUT CAMILA :(( SHE LOOKS SO HAPPY 🥹🩷

→ user11 THIS!! YOU KNOW THAT LITTLE GIRL IS LOVED BY HOW MUCH FERNANDO (FERNANDO FOR CRYING OUT LOUD) POSTS HER 🥹

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ Ella es mi princesita, of course I post her ☺️

→ user12 “she’s my princess” IM GONNA CRY.

user13 ugh y/n is so classy.

→ user14 very classy very demure

francisca.cgomes ✔︎ she’s growing up so fast 🥹🥹

→ y/n_l/n I know! I still remember when she was just born 🩷

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ and I still remember you screaming and crushing my hand 😅

→ y/n_l/n we agreed to keep this silent 😞

fernandoalo_offical ✔︎

liked by f1, georgerussell63, astonmartinf1, and others

fernandoalonso father like daughter!

tagged; y/n_l/n

2,348 comments

user15 PROJECT VERSTAPPEN!!

→ user16 NO, PROJECT HAMILTON

→ user17 i say project schumacher 🙃

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ everyone forgot about project alonso 😞

→ user18 look at what you guys did. you made grandpa sad.

lewishamilton ✔︎ already better than most people i knew of on the track! 🤩 🏁

→ nicorosberg ✔︎ …🤨

astonmartinf1 ✔︎ already preparing for that seat 👀

→ user19 yeah, if lance or fernando ever leave 😭

→ user20 LMAO

f1 ✔︎ Future World Champion in the making!

→ user21 a woman could be f1 champion 😂🤣

→ oscarpiastri ✔︎ imagine bullying a little girl @ user21

→ landonorris ✔︎ imagine hating on a little girl that could kick your ass in karting @ user21

→ maxverstappen1 ✔︎ imagine feeling the need to say something out of your ass because your jealous she can be better than you @ user21

→ carlossainz55 ✔︎ imagine being such a lowlife @ user21

→ charles_leclerc ✔︎ imagine being such a piece of shit @ user21

→ lance_stroll ✔︎ imagine taking your anger on a girl who’s father loves her enough to put her into something she loves and you couldn’t because your father left for milk and never came home after 40+ years. @ user21

view 1239 more comments by alexalbon, lewishamilton, yukitsunoda, and others?

→ user22 watching the grid defend camila and degrade this middle-aged man is the highlight of my day.

→ y/n_l/n couldn’t have asked for better friends 🥹

INSTAGRAM

y/n_l/n

y/n_l/n my babies ❤️

tagged; fernandoalonso, oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer

3,208 comments

oscarpiastri ✔︎ mama e papa

→ user23 NOT FERNANDO AND Y/N ADOPTING OSCAR AND LILY

→ fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ mi amor, you do know that oscar and lily aren’t our children right?

→ y/n_l/n what do you mean i literally birthed them out of my vagina??

→ oscarpiastri ✔︎ wait wouldn’t that make her my sister and not… my girlfriend..? 😬

→ y/n_l/n i take it back i didn’t birth them out from inside of me

user24 the family we didn’t know we needed

user25 HER FLUFFY DRESS.

→ y/n_l/n alexandra picked it out! she taste in fashion is impeccable ❤️

→ alexandrasaintmleux ✔︎ always happy to help out! it was the best having camila with us during the ceremony 🩷

user26 the way she sat on Fernando’ss laop the whole time and clapped when everyone started clapping 😭

→ user27 AND WHEN SHE WOULD SAY HI TO THE DRIVERS ON THE STAGE WHEN THEY WERE CALLED UP

→ user28 everyone loves camila l/n-alonso

maxvertsappen1 ✔︎ stop she is so cute im crying 😭😭😭😭😭😭🥹🥹😞😞😓😓😔😔😔🫶🤌🥰

→ charles_leclerc ✔︎ max how drunk on alcohol are you right now?

→ maxvertsappen1 ✔︎ 5’11

→ landonorris ✔︎ HE SAID DRUNK NOT HIGH YOU MUPPET 💀

fernandoalo_offical ✔︎

🎵 Slipping Through My Fingers - ABBA

liked by lewishamilton, yukitsunoda, felipedrugovich, and others

fernandoalonso ¡Creciendo tan rápido! First day of school already! 🏫 Camila even got asked what she wanted to be when she grew up and said she’d like to be a engineer ❤️

tagged; y/n_l/n

2,348 comments

user29 THE SONG.

→ user30 NONONO I CAN’T DO THIS. NOT WITH THIS SONG :(

→ user31 “Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning”

→ user32 “Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile”

→ landonorris ✔︎ ENOUGH OF THIS YOU MONSTERS.

oscarpiastri ✔︎ i can you you crying from your hotel room @ landonorris

→ landonorris ✔︎ LEAVE ME ALONE LET ME CRY IN PEACE.

user33 mama mia core 😭

user34 i just watched a child grow up. i feel so old.

landonorris ✔︎ i swore she was just born 4 months ago

→ y/n_l/n and i swore i saw you bribbing her to be a mclaren fan not too long ago too! 😊

lance_stroll ✔︎ will miss seeing her in the garage 😞

→ y/n_l/n Camila says she’ll miss you too Lancey 💚

→ user37 MORE LACEY STROLLY AND CAMILA CONTENT 🗣️

user35 SHE 😭 WANTS 😭 TO 😭 BE 😭A 😭 ENGINEER

user36 mark my words she will be in f1 one way or another.

kellypiquet ✔︎ the absolute cutest. can’t wait for her a P to hang out again sometime soon!

♥️ liked by Author!

→ y/n_l/n planning the next play date already!

TWITTER, 204?

INSTAGRAM, 204?

camila_y/nalonso has made a new post!

camila_y/nalonso truly a honor for my dream to come true. from being a little girl watching everything happen, to finally working on everything happening. ¡Vamos, McLaren! (P.S Thank you Uncle Lando for getting me into McLaren 🧡 )

tagged; mclaren

3,405 comments

fernandoalo_offical ✔︎ Esa es mi chica. ❤️ (That's my girl.)

[devotion-disorder]

Not sure if it's just me or not but even after you fixed the link it still doesn't seem to work 😞. Also I'm not sure if this has been answered before but how likely are the boys to kidnap us? What would the living conditions be like for us? Also when is Noel gonna let me out of his freaky sex dungeo-

no you're right the link was broken again 💀💀💀 should be fixed now (fr this time)

I think Noel is more likely than Kuuya to kidnap their target. First for purely logistical reasons - he's got that streamer money to afford a nice place with a spare room while Kuuya is still living in a 4-tatami run-down apartment downtown. But generally speaking, Noel is more emotionally volatile and reckless, while Kuuya is sometimes too cowardly to act on what he wants to do.

In the very loose line of lore i have in my head (which id say are like, half-canon only, so feel free to disregard it), Noel and his s/o hasnt been in contact since their childhood days, and he has changed pretty dramatically since then. On the other hand, Kuuya most likely falls for someone he already sees on a routine basis (a coworker, a 7-11 cashier, his neighbor etc etc) so he's fulfilled by watching at a distance to some extent. So Noel might be more desperate to reconnect with his s/o through whatever means possible.

On a baseline level, the living conditions with Noel aren't too bad. You'll probably be given your own en-suite room, which would be nice if the doors actually had locks on them. He'll spoil you with whatever you want to eat, on the condition that you'll eat it while sitting on his lap. But having all of these 'privileges' also means he can take them away as easily as he gives them out...disobey him and see how fast he can turn your room into a sensory deprivation chamber.

Kuuya, on the other hand, doesn't even have a big enough room for a work desk, let alone two beds. So you can expect zero personal space at all times and everything becoming a co-op activity LOL. Not that he's complaining though. His insane working hours might be your only reprieve, but you might be driven to insanity faster by the sheer boredom of staring at the same 4 walls everyday than the fact that you're cohabiting with a psycho.

[inesbaby21]

Kate just admiring reader and watching her with her puppy dog eyes☹️

Ahhhh I love you nonnie omg!

- I'm just seeing reader on live/recording a grwm to post and kate just sitting on the bed behind her admiring her!

- Or like Game day grwm's- and Kate wants a little makeup nothing toooo crazy, but it's a home game so of course she wants to look purty and stuff! so she begs (not like she had to beg anyway!) for you to do a some light breathable makeup on her. I'm literally gushing this is too cute!

- Post!game Kate who just wants to shower, get the interviews over-with, eat, and wind down with hyperfeminine!reader omgomgomgggg.

- Kate is secretly a girly girl idc, hyf!reader and Kate definitely have matching/monogramed pj's and definitely share a skincare routine!

"Y/N/NNNN it's 9 o'clock- i'm sleepy and we have a busy day tomorrow" Kate says pouting as you talk to viewers/reply to some comments asking about your hair/very obvious matching pj's.

- I definitely can see Kate dating/marrying a Nepo!Baby BIGGGGG time- or not gonna lie a model! Like not someone who's like super out there- but quiet and reserveddd! Someone who brings her back down to earth after a bad day/game you know?

"I do understand where your coming from Syd- and that this loss wasn't something to take to heart, but Y/N came in from Milan to watch me play and we lost" The blonde says genuinely upset- and hurt, don't get me wrong you definitely didn't care if she won or lost, but it hurt Kate knowing that you'd traveled so far to see her- and she still had lost.

-Hyperfeminine!Reader who does NOT need Kate to dumb things down for her, and mad it very clear that she wouldn't be interested in going to watch Kate play if she didn't understand the sport (definitely had to watch one of those basketball explained in girl term tiktok's but we don't judge!)

-Hyperfem!reader Who definitely has scary girlfriend privilege; wearing whatever she wants at ANY time of the day because "Her girlfriend can fight"

-Whipped!Kate who definitely has a designated section in her closet for readers sleepwear, a few pairs of everything- and her emergency jewelry box! Because what's worse than an ugly outfit? No accessories duh 😞

"Kate fucking Martin. There's no way you keep a whole 1/5th of your closet for your girlfriends stuff" Jada Say Wheezing- as she shows the live the difference between the red, blue, white, black, and grey colors of her wardrobe; and then the pink, green, black, and white section that she had unintentionally dubbed as yours.

- HyperFem!Reader who takes the most unhinged, off guard, and borderline clipped pictures of Kate on Facetime/While she sleeps because "Her face is just so sweet when she's sleeping."

-Hyperfeminine!Reader Who take Kate on a Sephora trip to get her a full face of makeup (She's never gonna touch it Unless you do it, but you know just to have for whenever she's ready!)

-Hyperfeminine!Reader who spent most of her childhood/adolescence running from her femininity/was a tomboy- but randomly after hitting 16-19 had a whole life altering change in style, interest, activity.

- Hyperfeminine!Reader who let's Kate know that she doesn't have to be a "gentleman", and CONSTANTLY reminds Kate that she is a girl too, and never makes her feel ashamed for her more "girlish" interests/hobbies.

-Hyperfeminine!Reader who takes Kate to get her nails/feet done every few weeks (they do those cute matchy matchy couple sets) Kate has to get the shorter/gel of course because of basketball but!

A/N currently listening to country music! may have given me to strength to carry on 😣

[firemenenthusiast]

"WAIT THIS IS- WAIT we should get farleigh to fuck reader thinking he’ll get anything he wants, the whole sexgod privilege just cuz youre the one who asked for it but when hes about to cum you go “oh no no”. but farleigh turns into goo under your orders so"

OK SO I HAVE AN IDEA!! their academic rivals and have a bet going on that he gets to fuck you if he got a higher score on a test or smth?!?!? IDK I JUST HAVE A THING FOR ENEMIES FUCKING 😞😞 SUE ME

the day hath come. thank you for your request anon ! <3

—“me or you”

academic rival! farleigh start! x fem!reader

summary: when farleigh decided that your rivalry isn’t fun enough for him, he proposes a deal

warnings: 18+, enemies to lovers, academic rivals, smut in the second half of it, sub!farleigh, porn with plot, unprotected p in v (wrap it guys), sub! farleigh, soft dom! reader, size kink, whiny whimpery farleigh, praise kink, cunnilingus, blow job, teabagging, creampie, plot twist and fluff at the end

a/n: sorry if i took too long, enjoy !

academic validation is everything to you. you believe you’re nothing if not an overachiever. but for farleigh, it’s just an excuse for him to be contemptous towards you. everyone else in the class is obviously displeased with your feud with him, but it’s mostly just farleigh spewing vulgar insults at you. that’s just how he presents himself. you could go and ask around the campus about him-

most would comment on his attitude that he thinks he could get away with- just because he’s smart. academically smart. no one knows how he does it. its not like he spends his afternoons in the library or catching up on his studies in his free time. hell, he does the exact opposite of those things. the term party animal is a downgrade for him. the owner of the nearest pub knows him. the most elite parties on campus are known to be thrown by him.

weirdly enough, when it comes to tests and exams, he excels them like nobody else. whatever he has to do for the class doesn’t faze him. you’re pretty confident that he doesn’t even study yet somehow, he’s at the top of his class. you on the other hand, put a lot of effort to achieve your exceptionally high scores. seeing farleigh being absent for most of his class pains you, it reminds you of how bad you have to struggle while he get to trash himself. enjoy the uni life. what irks you even more is the fact that everytime he scores higher than you, he’ll make sure to flaunt it all over your face. every single time. you roll your eyes when you spot the dark curly headed figure towering almost everyone across the hall, a couple books in his hand. how pretentious. it’s not like he even reads them.

flashing a quick smirk towards you, he swiftly skips to get in front to hold the lecture hall door open. he gave everyone else before you a small smile, trying to convince them of the pure intention of his nice little gesture. “goodluck guys” his head tilted upwards for a bit, nodding at each of the students. you cant help but crack a little smile watching the boy. as you were about to step into the hall, he swings the door closed behind him.

“what the fuck ?” you blurt out, head tilted trying to look at him. “goodluck” he grins, eyebrows raised with a smug look on his face. “for the test” he continues. “for what else dumbass?” insufferable, you think. he winces mockingly at your words

the test. the one that is particularly of the toughest subject out of your course. one that you had studied your ass off for. one that farleigh couldn’t give a single fuck about and still gonna ace it. gifted son of a bitch. and you’re gonna have to sit through him making fun of you for the 2 marks difference. it’s been like this for a couple semesters now. you struggling to keep your scores high, while farleigh tease you about it. just because you give him a challenge for the top position everytime there’s a test. the first semester of the course, he scored the best in the class for the first assessment. that gave him extra unneeded ego for the next couple weeks until you beat him in other tests after. he’d acknowledged you since. he loves a pretty face that challenges him.

“yes whatever farleigh now move” you try to pay no attention to him, reaching out to pull the door yourself. he quickly adjusts his stance against the door “okay! okay-”his arms reach out to his sides, protecting the entrance.

“-i have a proposition for you”

“i dont have time for this farleigh” you really dont, the tests starting anytime now.

“hear me out first”. one of his arm is held up to convince you. you sigh, the most uninterested expression staring back at him. “you know how you always excel these tests and i always do better than you-?”. “if youre keeping me here just to ridicule me save it for after the test” you begin to move before he continues

“—so you admit i always do better ? i mean, who’s keeping the score anyways” he chuckles. your patience is getting thin. before you could move again he steps closer, towering over you. hot breath fanning over your face as he grabs your arm.

“why dont we make it more fun ?” he begins, emphasizing the last part, almost whispering into your ear. “if you score better, you get all the bragging rights and mocking pass until the next test” you begin to soften your expression, intrigued. you look up at him, eyes searching into his. he stares into you before leaning down to continue

“—and if i score better, i get to fuck you”

you ball your palms into fists at his stupid idea before shoving him to the side and storming into the lecture hall. your jaws clenching with your lips pursed shut. he’s getting out of hand if he thinks you’re just another bet felix can set him up upon. you hear him follow you before he settles in a seat rows away from you. you glance at him to see he’s already looking at you, grinning.

as you’re finishing up the final answers and re-checking the paper you’re brought back to farleigh’s proposition earlier. somehow you’re fueled with a newfound confidence that you’re gonna beat him. the test wasn’t that bad, you studied and all and there wasn’t any questions that you didn’t answer confidently. suddenly those bragging rights sound tempting. usually when you score higher than him you’d just keep it to yourself cuz whenever you do try to belittle him how he does you, he’s quicker with sharp insults that leaves you dumbfounded. a classmate once tried standing up for you after one of his rude remarks and got a disgusted look from him in return. his exact words were “who are you again ?” so you decided long ago not to indulge in his childish behaviour. but you’re getting sick of him. at this point you’d do anything to shut the raging ego of his. even if it means risking yourself

the loud sound of papers rustling and the creaking of the hall’s seats marks the end of the test, everyone’s getting up and walking towards the exit. you found yourself pushed into a corner by the crowd that seems to be chasing a leaving train. there’s no opening for you to squeeze yourself in so you decide to wait until they’re all gone. suddenly the crowd stopped and you feel a hand pulling you forward, safely getting you out of the exit with his body close behind yours. he brings you further to the nearest turn, making sure you’re out of the crowd. you look up at him, knowing it was him. you shoot him a serious look before saying,

“deal”

“wait-“ he scoffs in disbelief “really ?” he has a whole confused, disbelief look on his face. “yeah, there’s no way you’re gonna score higher, you’ve been doing what, coke all week ?” you say. “true, but i’ll come by. i always do” he shrugs before saying, “no take backs” you give him a small smile before starting to walk away. “you should smile more baby !” you hear him say from afar. his usual smug look entering your mind

the rest of next week is filled with him trying to get you flustered and nervous waiting for the result. there’s no actual reason for you to be this nervous, he’s got no chance against you this time. every class with him feels a lot longer than usual as he teases you about the deal every chance he could. telling jokes that centers you being smarter than him to the whole class got you rethinking about your decision. while you’re confident, he seems to be composed. in the class of the subject you guys had the test for, there’s a time when the professor brought up that the paper will be returned next week and you cant help but glance at farleigh. he smiles before bringing up a peace sign to his mouth, his tongue darting forward between his fingers before moving it in a licking motion. he chuckles at your reaction as you roll your eyes

your professor offers a smile to your classmate reaching her hand out to take the paper from him. “good job, keep it up” he steps down from the last flight of stairs with his hands clasped together. “congratulations to all of you regardless of your scores, theres still time and room for improvement so keep your chin up” he positively encouraged before dismissing the class. you look down at the paper in your hands, a proud smile forcing itself onto your lips as you beam at the circled number in red at the top of it. a whopping 98 for the toughest subject you’ve ever took. satisfied is the least you’re feeling right now as the familiar busy sound of students getting ready to hit the exit floods your ears, you hear the professor calling a name. “farleigh ? please see me after class” your eyebrows furrowed seeing him mouth a “yea” while picking up his books. thats the most plain you’ve ever seen him. no smug look thrown towards you either.

from his expressions you could assume that maybe he’s dissatisfied with his score but just how bad can it be ? knowing him he could’ve taken the test drunk and still be able to score atleast an A. your eyes follow him walking towards the exit, his messenger hanging low against his hips. you were waiting for some officialization from him, saying that you won, and that you get to mock him all you want yet you’re left with nothing. i mean, you certainly won right ? he could only beat you if he scored 99 or a 100. maybe you’ll try him tomorrow.

rubbing your eyebrows, your eyes scan the lesson material that you had just printed out for today. words stacked above another forming a paragraph that you’re hoping to find the point of. sound of footsteps entering fills the class when you feel someone tapping at the back of your seat. you turn your head back and to the front again to see farleigh walking past slowly to say, “your clock starts now nerd, next tests on the second week next month” as he points his finger at you

“heard you got a new daddy farleigh, got him to up your score ?” you’re near yelling at him who’s getting away. he pays you no attention as he flips you off. a smile appears on your face. no nasty remarks in return. so it begins. for the rest of the class you get to shut his sarcastic jokes with your own. the class is suprised to say the least that farleigh is the receiving end now. something must’ve happened they think, and most have their money on that you guys fucked. you shrug at your efforts on utitilising the mockery pass. you’d manage to catch him after class just to offer him another teasing “you know i can tutor you if you want. a one on one so maybe you can retire from being a boytoy” you beam at him. he gives you an unamused look, lips shut to hold himself from shooting a response to the joke. “maybe you should” he says, raising both his arms to quickly drop them before turning his heels and walking away. you watch him strut down the hall with a grin plastered across your face. until something hits you that the grin slowly wears off. you feel empty that he’s not shooting sarcasms back at you. you get it that this will only last until the next test and it’s part of the deal but you cant help feeling like, ‘this is it ?’. suddenly a part of you think that it would be better if he responded back. you’re used to that. you want him to banter.

so when you end up standing infront of his door you have no one else to blame but yourself.

you had asked students around the dorm halls and they all pointed to this door. sighing, you try to justify yourself for whats about to happen. “what are you doing here ?” you lower the knuckles that were about to knock, heels automatically turning to the source of the voice. he quirks an eyebrow at seeing you infront of his dorm. unfamiliar with the image cuz he’s never seen you around the building. “what are YOU doing here” youre quick to answer before realising how stupid it is. “i kinda need to be here. i live in the room just behind you” you scoff at his answer. he squints his eyes before saying, “wow, youre determined”.

“what ?”

“you came all the way here to brag about the test ?—”

“no” you stop him before continuing, “its weird that you didnt return any of my insults today” you begin. he slows down his steps, pacing around before stopping infront of you. he examines the knitted material of your cardigan, his eyes trailing to find yours. “well for one, they’re mediocre at best-“ you scoff before lightly shoving him, “fuck you”. he shrugs, eyes wandering across the hall before continuing, “—and its part of the deal sweetheart” you look down at your shoes, nodding slightly. exactly, that was the deal, you admit to yourself, ignoring the pet name. you take a deep breath as he runs his hand across the back of his neck, carefully adjusting the stray curls at the side of his head. “well if you dont have anything else, im just gonna-“ his hand moves to the side of you to grab the doorknob.

you look up at him, searching into his eyes before he notices. “unless youre here for that tutoring-“ you grab at the fabric on his chest, pulling him against you before crashing your lips onto his dark red ones. kissing at his bottom lip, he returns the kiss deeper, nose bumping against each other. he pulls away slightly, puffing hot breath before pulling you closer by your lower back. his forehead rests against yours as his mouth chases your lips, returning a deeper and more eager kiss. his hands resting low at your hips as his impatient kiss pushes you back against the door. you pull away for a moment to catch your breath when a small whine escapes his lips, his eyes still closed. he’s leaning forward trying to catch your lips to which you lean into once more. his hand move from your waist to the doorknob, twisting it before catching you from falling backwards. next thing you know you’re placed on his strangely clear study with him leaving sloppy kisses down your stomach, moving towards your clothed pussy. your cardigan and shorts lying on the floor

he looks at you through his long lashes, his large hands sprawled over your hips, smoothing over the skin. “may i ?” you nearly moan at his low voice. you nod as he mouths at your clothed cunt, nose nudging against your clit, panties almost transluscent with your wetness. you let out a breathy moan as he peppers small kisses all over the thighs caging him, slowly biting at the skin. he trails kisses until he reaches where you want him the most before pushing your panties to the side. his breath hitched as he does so, timidly licking your wet folds to have a taste. you hear him moan, your hands running through his hair to pull back the parts covering his face so you can watch him sucking at your sex. his eyes shut close savouring your taste as you hear him mumble against your folds, sending shivers down your spine. “mhm- s’good…so pretty” his hands roam from the low of your back to your stomach before trailing down to rub your clit. he pulls away for a moment to run his thumb between your folds, eyes dark as he watches your pussy clench around nothing. his bottom lip between his teeth. he dives back in with half lidded eyes before laying his tongue flat against your folds. you let out a small moan as you pull at his hair, earning a groan from him. you could feel the knot in your lower stomach getting tighter.

you push him from your pussy before getting off of his study. he follows you, getting up from the floor, cock painfully hard in his sweats forming a tent with a dark patch at the top. you curse in your head seeing the view before pushing him down onto his bed. he scoots back to lean against the wall as you climb onto his lap, pulling your shirt off you. his eyes trail downwards to look at your hardened nipples, his eyes darkened with a full blown lust before reaching up to knead at them. he kisses your nipples before putting them in his hot mouth at which you arch your back slightly, your hands pushing him forwards from the back of his head. you start to grind at his hard clothed cock as you feel the wet patch you saw earlier. he moans loudly at you grinding down especially harder on the base of his cock, sitting on his balls. steadying yourself, you grab his shoulders as you lean in to nip at his earlobes. his hand moves to grab at your hips as you rub your wet panties against his bulge while kissing at his neck, slightly biting and sucking at the skin, leaving marks. he whimpers with a slight pout when you start to slow down

“please,,”

“please what farleigh ?”

“anything- fuck! please,, take it off”

you smile at his pleas, continuing to grind on his cock, the wet patch at his tip getting bigger, spreading to the base of his cock. you arch your back slightly while moving, placing your tits at his mouth which he latches on obediently. his cock twitches as he bucks his hips upwards from the pressure. he pulls away to rest his head on your chest, head tilted downwards to watch your pussy getting his sweats wetter before throwing his head back with a long moan. “feels- feel so good- wan’ you faster” he starts stuttering words between begging you to go faster and to go slower, confused to decide what he actually wants. “does this feel good farleigh ?” you grind faster as he nods rapidly in return “dont stop- fuck, please dont stop” you could feel his cock jumping slightly and twitching, threatening to spill his load in his pants before you do just what he tells you not to. “no- baby,,” he throws his head back, strained whimper escapes his lips in defeat as you giggle. his knee buckles up involuntarily. you get off his lap, removing his hands from your hips to settle on the floor, tits pressed against the edge of the bed.

you look up at him who has the back of his hand pressed against his forehead as you graze your fingers on the outline of his cock, now completely wet with his precum and your wetness. your touches making him buck his hips, his eyes shut close as he throws his head back. you pull at his waistband slowly, pressing it down so it grazes along his achingly hard cock, earning a wince from him. “slow- slower, please,,” his hand reach yours trying to get you to be careful. you nod at him giving him what he wants, not wanting him to cum just yet. as soon as the waistband’s off his thick hard cock springs upwards, slapping his lower stomach. he’s thick, and it curves slightly upwards. placing your hand at the base, you’re suprised to see the size of him. batting your lashes at him with his cock in your hand, he gives you a smug smile

“big?”

“—average” you respond, receiving a chuckle from him

he’s the biggest you’ve had.

you swipe your thumb across his tip, collecting the precum to spread on his cock. switching hands, you begin to pump his length, your fingers barely closing around his cock. you reach down your panties with your free hand to collect your wetness before using it as lube to stroke his cock. “fuck that’s so hot-” you hear him say before letting out a loud moan when you suddenly start sucking at his tip. maintaining eye contact through your lashes, you make sure to make him watch you lay your tongue flat at the base of his length, slowly dragging it upwards. you have both your hands and your mouth working on the aching tip, slobbering his cock with your wetness, saliva and precum. stroking his cock at a steady pace you adjust your position to arch downwards, your mouth leaning into the base of his cock to lick under his balls. “ah— fuck-! mhm“ his hand fisting the sheets under him, chest heaving breathlessly. he let out a whine when you put his balls into your mouth, the warmth sending him into pure bliss. sucking at the skin, you make sure to twist at his raging red tip as you do so. you pull off with a pop to collect saliva in your mouth before spitting on his balls. just as the spit starting to trickle down you catch it with your mouth to bring it to his length. he tries to contain his moan by pursing his lips yet a weak whimper leaves his lips. he shoots you a puppy look as you continue sucking him off. you can feel his already tight balls getting tighter as his cock jumps against his lower stomach. he’s painfully hard to the point that one more lick and he’ll be cumming.

so you stop working on his cock to get on your feet. his eyes filled with tears threatening to spill down his tinted cheeks. his pretty long lashes wet from the tears pooling in his eyes, making them glossy. he looks up at you, your knees pressing against his bed before you climb onto him, your hands reaching his face to cup his cheeks. the tears in his eyes that were threatening to fall trickles down as you wipe them with your thumb. “you wanna cum farleigh ?” you ask. “yes please” “you dont look it” he blinks to clear his eyes from tears, “i want to, please- let me cum please” his hands slowly creep up your body to pull you close in his embrace. his eyes pleads into yours before you pull his head towards you letting him rest on your breast. “okay” you promise. he takes the chance to mouth at your tits. throwing your head back, you feel him suck at one of your nipple and squeezing the other with his large hand making you moan. you pull at his hair to look at him, he offers you a soft smile. probably too delirious from the pleasure to even think.

you pull him off you to quickly get off the bed, taking off your wet panties before climbing back holding it. you lean down to kiss him, his head tilted upwards to return your kiss. his sucks at your tongue until he feels your lips being replaced by a wet fabric. he moans realising that you had stuffed his mouth with your panties, aiming the wet patch directly onto his tongue before kissing the top of his head. he always has his free hands to take out the panties if he wants to. he looks down at his hard weeping cock just inches away from your pussy. he buckles his hips forward in a pathetic attempt to rub his cock against your pussy. you giggle at his action before steadying your hands on hus shoulder, looking down as you lower yourself on his cock, rubbing the tip against your clit and the length between your folds. you hear him make some mumbled sound before you pull out the panties from his mouth. strings of saliva connected to the fabric as he puffs out, catching his breath.

“just fuck me,, cant anymore-“

“you cant ?” he shakes his head

“but i thought you’re the mighty farleigh start ?” you tease him. he swallows his saliva at your words.

“not with you, no- please, just make me cum baby” the tip of his nose dusted red, his lips swollen and redder than ever. his eyes glossy with some of the remaining tears at the corner of his eyes, searching into yours as he pleads

you finally give in, grabbing his cock to position it at your sex earning a loud guttural moan from him. you let out a high pitched whine from the stretch, the slide of his cock into your pussy easy thanks to all the wetness from before. you move back and forth, grinding your clit against his pelvis before starting to ride his cock. he bites his bottom lip watching you bounce on his length, fucking yourself. the pace of your hips steady with his hands grabbing at them to guide you. farleigh throws his head back from the pleasure, his mouth hanging agape. you feel the knot in your lower stomach getting tighter, feeling waves threatening to crash down. “you close ?” he asks as he feels your pussy clench around him making it harder for him to hold back. you nod at him, trying to focus on chasing your orgasm. you feel him suddenly buckle his hips into you before you let out a high pitched moan, screaming his name. he helps you ride out your high before you hear a string of curses falling from his lips, his thrust getting sloppy. “inside, farleigh”. he looks at you to make sure he heard you right as you nod at him. you let him move your hips as he wants, using you like a fleshlight before you hear him let out a loud moan. “ah-ahh—! fuck, fuck, fuck- fuuuck,,”. the curses falling from his lips gets dragged out as you feel warm ropes of thick cum shooting inside your pussy, hitting your cervix.

he struggles to catch his breath as he carefully gets you off his lap, placing your head on his pillow before joining you. sighing, his eyes blown wife while looking up at the ceiling. he props himself on his elbow to look at you, admiring your glow. you cant help but slowly let out a laugh at what the two of you just did. he shakes his head low, also laughing before leaning down to kiss you. the kiss is more passionate and sensual, unlike before. he crawls down to look at your pussy, his cum trickling down to his sheets before he wastes no time collecting and pushing them back into you. “all good” he informs before climbing back to lie beside you as you two finish catching your breaths.

you look around, scanning his room before turning your head to look at his bedside table. you notice a familiar paper, slightly crumpled. propping yourself on your elbow, you take a closer look at it. it’s the test that makes your deal, with a circled score in red at the top of it. a 62. you quickly turn to him, he’s already looking at you, a cig in his hand and a lighter in another, ready to light it. he looks at the paper in your hand and raises his eyebrow

“what ?”

“a 62, farleigh ? seriously ?”

“yeah i purposely put the wrong answers, atleast for some part of it”

he answers you, unbothered. he purses his lips around the cig, almost lighting it as he notices that you’re still waiting for some sort of explanation. he sighs before letting his head fall back onto the pillow

“i wanted you to win” he admits. your eyebrows furrowed, clearly confused

“so you can atleast see some good in me, when im not bullying you” to which you respond,

“you could’ve just stop insulting me like a normal person”

“but then everyone will realise that i was falling for you”

your face softens at his words. his eyes roam across the ceiling, trying to avoid your eyes before he continues, “—everyone knows i dont just ‘fall’ for people” you search his face for some sort of indicator that he’s trolling you but to no avail. you both sit in silence for a moment before you lean in to kiss him. his hands reach up to your face, pushing the hair covering the side of your face away. your hand reach up to cup his face, deepening the kiss. you pull away smiling at him to which he rolls his eyes playfully.“great now you have something to tease me about”. “i like you too farleigh” you quickly cut him. he cant help the smile creeping on his face. you both continue to sit in silence drinking in each others presence.

“study date ?” you suggest

“i dont study, sweetheart”

taglist: @june-ebgert @radioloom @fuckshitslover @szapizzapanda @themoonchildwhofell @love-me-pls

[mrpldiddles]

puppy. | j.drysdale

a/n: so i actually started this this morning before the trade was announced😀 but here’s a quick(ish) little ig edit since i haven’t posted anything in awhile while i work on the tbosas fic that will be coming soon!!

rip trevjamie tho man idk how i’m gonna recover this is like barzy and beau all over again

anaheimducks posted:

anaheimducks: we have a four-legged announcement on #NationalPuppyDay! everyone say hi to Daisy!

comments:

user1: can we talk about jamie with daisy🥺

user2: trevor and jamie look like they need a dog

-> yourusername: don’t encourage them🤧

trevorzegras: @yourusername 🥺🥺🥺

-> jamie.drysdale: @yourusername please🥺🥺🥺

-> yourusername: are you gonna take care of it🥺🥺

-> trevorzegras: YEAH

-> yourusername: LIES you don’t even clean up after yourself

-> trevorzegras: HEY

-> jamie.drysdale: she has a point z…

-> trevorzegras: DON’T TAKE HER SIDE JIMMY

-> user3: this is so entertaining

jackhughes: @yourusername just let them have a puppy

-> trevorzegras: PUPPY! PUPPY! PUPPY!

-> yourusername: you live across the country jack you don’t get a say in this

-> jamie.drysdale: PUPPY! PUPPY! PUPPY!

-> colecaufield: but look how excited they are🥺

-> yourusername: cole you’re not even in the country

-> masonmctavish23: puppy???

-> yourusername: oh god not you too

-> trevorzegras: i promise to put it in direct sunlight and water it everyday🫡

-> yourusername: oh my god

-> jamie.drysdale: he’s joking! (i think…)

-> yourusername: you two are gonna be the death of me

-> trevorzegras: so PUPPY????

yourusername posted:

yourusername: @trevorzegras @jamie.drysdale puppy.

comments:

trevorzegras: PUPPY!!!

jamie.drysdale: PUPPY!!!

masonmctavish23: PUPPY!!!

colecaufield: PUPPY!!!

jackhughes: PUPPY!!!

_quinnhughes: you’re weak

-> yourusername: i know😞

yourbffsusername: how much did they pay you

-> yourusername: a year’s worth of cleaning the bathroom for trevor and a year’s worth of back rubs from jamie🥰

-> trevorzegras: i still think the difference in payment is unfair

-> yourusername: you may be my boyfriend’s boyfriend but you’re not mine

-> trevorzegras: 😞

anaheimducks: a new friend for daisy!!

-> yourusername: that’s what sold me on little miss maisie☺️

-> trevorzegras: for the record i wanted to name her nutter butter

-> colecaufield: NUTTER BUTTER🥜🧈

-> _quinnhughes: are you trying to ruin the poor dog’s life

-> jackhughes: i call for a re-vote between maisie and nutter butter

-> jamie.drysdale: y/n says no

-> yourusername: i’m not naming my child nutter butter.

jamie.drysdale posted:

jamie.drysdale: everybody say thank you @yourusername :)))))))

comments:

trevorzegras: thank you y/n!!!!!

colecaufield: thank you y/nnnnnn

jackhughes: thanks best friend y/n

-> yourusername: i think that title actually belongs to quinn

-> jackhughes: ouch

-> _quinnhughes: thank you best friend y/n

-> yourusername: you're welcome quinny

masonmctavish23: thank you y/n for making me an uncle

-> yourusername: ofc ofc

-> user2: aw mason’s her uncle🥺🤧

yourusername: you're lucky you're cute

-> jamie.drysdale: don't i know it

-> trevorzegras: and what about me???🥺🥺

-> yourusername: you're lucky your boyfriend's cute

-> trevorzegras: i'll take it!!!

yourusername: our maisie girl🥰

-> jamie.drysdale: my two girls😘

-> trevorzegras: our nutter butter😊

-> yourusername: your godfather privileges are so close to being revoked zegras

-> masonmctavish23: the dogfather

-> yourusername: you're next in line don't worry mac

-> trevorzegras: after that joke??!!!??

-> masonmctavish23: i'm committed what can i say

trevorzegras posted:

trevorzegras: welcome to the family nutter butter!!

comments:

yourusername: that is NOT my daughter's name

-> trevorzegras: OUR daughter

-> jamie.drysdale: something i wanna know??

-> yourusername: jamie please tell your boyfriend that our daughter is not named after a cookie

->user1: their family tree is so confusing

jackhughes: NUTTER BUTTER!!!

-> _quinnhughes: and you wonder why you weren't named godfather

-> jackhughes: y/n is this true😭

-> yourusername: thanks for breaking the news for me quinn

-> jackhughes: wow🤧

-> yourusername: so sorry😐

colecaufield: is it still too late for a name re-vote?

-> yourusername: yes.

-> trevorzegras: still up for debate

-> masonmctavish23: is it too late to claim my godfather title?

-> yourusername: please do i can’t take them anymore🤧

-> trevorzegras: you can pry my title out of my dead hands😤

-> yourusername: promise😍

-> jamie.drysdale: don’t tempt her z

anaheimducks: daisy and maisie duck!!

[orphicdreamers-wp]

Girl Of My Dreams — Mat Barzal

Summary: In which Mat Barzal inadvertently falls for the oldest Hughes sibling and her brothers aren’t happy.

Content Warning; Taylor swift 1989 isn’t by Tay(its by reader) Mentions of University of Alabama (reader went there) Trevor Zegras being hopelessly in love with reader. Readers social media face claim is Addison Rae bc idc she’d clear as a WAG for a athlete.

Pairing: Mat Barzal x Hughes! Reader.

Mat would be lying if he said he didn’t sneak glances at the announcers box after meeting you. You had been carrying a plate of food and two margaritas to your booth where your friends sat. Tito had made a joke about you seeming familiar then the pair heard your voice and knew, “Alright now, eat up because y’all are bumming me out.” Mat’s jaw slacked, “He’d known that the Islanders had gotten a new game announcer who was a girl but he wouldn’t have known it was you. You were effortlessly stunning, you had captivated the attention of every straight man in the bar. Mat had approached you as you sat at the bar, “I’m Mat, can I buy you a drink?”

You grinned and spoke, southern accent slipping out, “I’m Y/N, I mean Barzy after the way you played last game? You better buy me a drink. ‘Yknow how many hate comments my broadcast got?” Mat grinned as the bartender approached you, “Another Corona Light and whatever she’s having on me.” You grinned sheepishly, “I’m fucking with you. I’ve heard worse.” Mat grinned, “So now would probably be a shitty time to ask you out?” You smiled at him, “Maybe not.” Mat smiled, “If I may, your not from New York are you? Where are you from?” You grinned, “I grew up in Toronto with my 3 younger brothers and moved to Alabama for college and been in New York for a few months now.” Mat grinned, “Well welcome to New York beautiful.” That was a year and a half ago. You still hadn’t told your brothers who your boyfriend was, just that his name was Mathew. Until your album release came creeping in and you wanted to go public with Mat.

Instagram

ynhughes; my album ‘1997’ is now streaming! thank you for all your support(especially the bf, ‘slut’ and ‘suburban legends’ are 4 us)

barzal97: celebrating you is my favorite pastime. i have never met someone who people gravitate towards more than you. you are by far the most wonderfully amazing woman i know. it is a privilege to say i love you🤎 this past year or so has changed my life. you make living easy and so so much better. i can’t wait to see what the future has in store for you.

trevorzegras: alexa play that should be me💔💔

ynhughes: forever in awe of you mathew barzal. amazed a gal like me is lucky enough to be adored by you🤎

oliviarodrigo; THEY HIT THE PENTAGON!! @conangray

>conangray; told you it was them i saw at radio music hall!

ny_islanders; our roman empire is all the sweet posts for to y/n today🥹🥹

sydneyemartin: brb crying. the purest people in the world. so grateful my girls get to grow up seeing a love this pure that isn’t their parents.

>ynhughes: we adore your girls more than words can express.

_quinnhughes: my biggest inspiration is out here killing it. in awe of you everyday sissy🥹 thank you for being my best friend from day 1

ynhughes: in a puddle of tears quinny. thank you for always being on my side, even when im wrong.

sabrinacarpenter; hockey players making me ugly sob wasn’t on my 2023 bingo card

elhughes; my first babies🥹 extremely emotional over you all today

>_quinnhughes: we love you momma💕

jackhughes: 1997 reasons to love my meanie head sister, i guess her bf’s alright

ynhughes: i love you little brat, come visit me and mat!!

>jackhughes: will do, sissy🫡

trevorzegras: i can’t believe she won’t date me 😞😞

>ynhughes: buck up z, your way too young for me. perfect age for @sabrinacarpenter tho!

lukehughes: the worlds best big sister came out with the best album to date

ynhughes; really feeling the hughes love train today, i need to plan for all of us to be together soon! so y’all can meet Mat!

etnow; this just in; the Hughes brothers have brought tears to my eyes supporting their sister

barzal97: the third picture is actually the most accurate representation of your sister now

>lukehughes; always messing with those darn cats! even if they are on the side of the street.

[tteokdoroki]

i like to think that hybrid katsuki fucks like he's trying to repopulate earth, my man doesn't stop until ure trembling 😔

but when it's over he's so sweet and so good but then suddenly he just puts his whole weight in u and falls asleep accidentally lol, during rut he's like cuddles☺️ -> HORNY -> nap.

૮ ͈>◡< ͈ა warnings — smut, minors dni 18+, hybrids, knotting, rut cycles, biting/marking, breeding, overstimulation, creampies, oral sex, cum eating, unprotected sex, dog hybrid!bakugou, gn!reader - sorry this took so long !!

oh my god, my love i cannot handle this 😞

like when i think of hybrid bakugou he’s probably either a wolf or one of those huge dog breeds that are sort of intimidating — don’t really get adopted out because of fear and stigma surrounding them, so when you pick bakugou he’s grateful but has a little bit of a complex … why would you pick him? don’t you know he’s dangerous?

except he’s not, and you know that he’s not. he’s just a big puppy who’s in need of some TLC!! dog hybrid!bakugou likes scratches behind the ear and he’s definitely a lap dog because he likes to stretch himself over you possessively in his discrete way of scent marking you. he gives you scary dog privileges but also whines and mopes around the house if you have to work and come home late. as soon as you’re through the door dog hybrid!bakugou is literally slobbering all over you, growling at the scents of other people on you and nosing at your neck, big arms wrapped around you from behind — only sedated by the promise of treats and getting to lie in your bed for the night.

but then come his ruts and that’s a whole different story. you thought dog hybrid!bakugou was clingy before but now it’s up by a tenth fold — you have to take at least a week off of work when it comes up because he won’t stop howling, won’t stop whining when you’re apart and the neighbours hate it. you have lunch with a male coworker and bakugou tears your home apart as soon as he smells them on you.

poor dog hybrid!bakugou practically begs you to let him inside, let him knot you — how can you say no? your poor baby’s burning up and humping at anything he can get at and it’s not quite enough for him. you feel his swollen thick cock pressed up against you from behind, slipping between the softness of your cheeks, the veins throbbing and his shaft sticky with all that precum he’s leaking. it’s meant to make that breeding process just that little bit easier.

“it hurts,” bakugou tells you, pressing his cheek against your shoulder from behind as lewd sounds of his hot and heavy erection squelch from behind you. “please, gotta cum. could cum like this but s’not enough.” now, your precious pup never asks you for much. he’s always content with what he has. but this time he’s begging for his, aching for any sort of relief and there’s only one way you can give it to him.

turning around in his hold and shuddering at just how hot dog hybrid!bakugou has gotten from his oncoming rut, you give him a meek nod. the sign and the signal is all he needs before tearing through your clothes — making you shudder at the hot press of his cock glistening with precum at your entrance.

dog hybrid!bakugou is so big he makes you choke on your own saliva, snug against your rippling walls — tip brushing against your most inner and sensitive parts. he’s hardly moved and you can feel him churning up your guts, feel slick pool between your thighs as you hopelessly grasp and scratch at the counter. he lets you adjust but only for a second, large palm on the small of your spine to make your back arch up just for him. like you’re his pretty little mate presenting for him.

“‘m g’na fill you up. pump’ya full of pups,” he snarls, rabid and roaring from deep in his chest with every canter of his hips forward — using all of his weight to swing them into you. you have no idea what he’s saying, can’t even hear him over your wet little hole clenching around him, gripping at pulsating veins that decorate his shaft every time he fucks himself into you. the scent of your sex, the feeling of blood rushing through you and your sweet little cries is what drives bakugou forward. the only thought running through his mind is to breed, breed, breed.

dog hybrid!bakugou puts all his weight on you, tail swishing and sticky between his strong legs as he thrusts into you — balls heavy with a hot load all saved up for you. you can feel it as they slap against your sex. he leaves teeth marks up your back, bruises on the fat of your hips from where he tugs you back to meet his cock. he’s so close he hardly wants to pull out of you, circling n he’s myself into with slow and uncoordinated grinds that are enough to make you cum twice before he does — your juices streaking down your trembling thighs as they weakly hold you up against the cool surface of the countertop.

dog hybrid!bakugou barely remembers to warn you about his knot when he does eventually cum — copious amounts of white, viscous seed pouring into you from behind, so much so, that it runs down from his bright red tip and seeps out of your sex in crude slaps to the floor. you whimper, brainless, as his dick swells inside you to keep you nice and full of his cum. making sure it sticks. and bakugou noses your neck softly when he lifts you carefully and carries you into his bedroom to rest before his next cycle.

“stop squirmin’ ‘n sleep. it’ll go down soon,” he tells you before quite literally knocking out on top of you, caging you in underneath him and all of his warmth — content and stuffed full of cock and cum. you have to admit, dog!hybrid bakugou is so cute with his twitching ears and shifting tail during his post-nut nap. falling asleep with him tl like this is comfortable and new too. adorable; even.

though, that’s as cute as it gets, because as soon as his knot’s gone down you wake up to dog hybrid!bakugou whimpering and grinding into the bedsheets he’s spiked with cum from waiting for you to wake up — sucking on your sex from between your thighs, tongue swirling around your hole as he eats his previous release out of you.

“yer finally awake,” katsuki slurs, red eyes delirious and hungry like an apex predator watching its prey. “don’t worry ‘bout me cleanin’ you up, ‘m just makin’ sure you’re ready for another round.”

[skeletalgoats]

BEING DEWDROP'S FAVORITE SISTER/BROTHER OF SIN HCS

Guys this was rushed at one AM I'm sorry if this is bad 😞

I was just jotting random things down 😒

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡♡♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

●Okay so we all pretty much know that this guy is such a mean chaotic and horny demon from hell.

●but OoOoh you tagged along and all of a sudden that chaotic and rudeness is gone when you're around.

●It doesn't matter, if Dew's in the middle of attacking someone like Swiss, the moment you enter that room, everything goes peaceful for you.

●He really can't point it out on why he's so fond of you, you're just so pretty???Handsome????Your personality????It's a mystery, honestly.

●If you're doing something, he may come across and ask if you need help.If you decline though, he's still gonna try helping you.

●this man is gonna defend you till the END. You're right in everything no matter what 🫶

●You guys are always seen together, not in a romantic way, but on a way that you guys are best friends that always have eachothers backs.

●He's SUCH a scene maker once you get to know him more, he no longer holds back when he's fighting with Swiss.

●You get the privilege of getting to touch his guitar, and ONLY you.

●Constantly making sexual jokes that involve you and him doing it.He has no shame.

●Once he get backs from tour, expect yourself to be jumped by him because he simply cannot be away from you for another second.

[gyuvision]

going, going, gone! -> [back to masterlist?]

wc ; 1.4k - pairing ; 1b hong seunghan x team manager fem reader

summary ; seunghan is benched for an argument between another player, but even though hes feeling down he convinces you to stay with him after hours.

contains -> swearing, fluff, comfort, angst

note - i love myungjae please know its just for the plot 😞

“but coach, its not fair! i dont understand what it is that i did wrong.” seunghan pleaded, quickly pulling his sweaty jersey off and changing into a clean tee as he begged the coach to let him play.

“seunghan please. you know i wouldnt bench my star player without a reason. even if its nationals, what you did was beyond unacceptable.” coach myung gestured to his nephew who was sitting on a bench with an ice pack to his swollen cheek.

myung jaehyun may have been a good player, but he wouldn’t have made it on the team if his uncle hadn’t been the coach. in doing so, he got away with almost anything with little to no consequences making him one of the most feared players in comparison to seunghan, who was the most respected.

“he yelled profanities at me and hit on our manager, y/n! not to mention how he came at me first?” seunghan defended himself, pointing to his bruised eye.

“hong seunghan that is more than enough! i’ve had it with you. you’re benched for the rest of the season. i don’t care who started what but i will not tolerate this behavior. not on my team. when you come back here tomorrow i’d expect you best have your attitude straightened up. everyone is dismissed.” the coach announced with not another word as he left the locker room, with the rest of the team following behind.

“damn it!” seunghan yelled, punching his locker in anger and disappointment.

“you really thought he’d let you play after that?” jaehyun scoffed. “you need a reality check, hong.”

“you’re still here?.. get out.”

“like my parents aren’t the ones who own the place? besides. the only reason you’re still here is because you’re dating the manager. i would’ve had a better chance anyway”

“i said get the fuck out. unless you want me to fuck up your other cheek too.”

“some nerve.” he muttered before walking through the door.

seunghan sighed, grabbing his jersey to go and sit in the dugout up until he saw you getting ready to leave.

“thought you left already.” seunghan whispered, knowing you heard everything. he didn’t want to disappoint you any further.

“oh seunghan..” you sighed, leaving your bag to go up to him and fix his messy bangs.

“i would try to-” “just please stay.” he begged as he wrapped his arms around your waist, hiding his face in your hair.

“seunghan..”

“..please?”

“…okay.” you nodded, letting him lead you to the field and to their dugout.

“whats on your mind?”

“i just dont get it.” seunghan spoke, looking into the pink horizon before turning to meet your eyes.

“get what?”

“why such jerks like myung jaehyun think theyre so much better than everyone else because theyre born into nepotism. it defeats everything ive worked so hard for.”

“he thinks hes better because hes privileged. but it doesnt mean that he actually is, babe.”

“i guess.”

“what if i talk to coach myung to let you play tomorrow? i know he wont let you play for the rest of the season but maybe tomorrow at least, hopefully.”

“you dont have to.”

“i know how happy baseball makes you. i couldnt just sit and watch you be so disappointed while you deserve to be out there. its worth a try.” you reassure him.

“i dont deserve you.” he muttered.

“this team doesnt deserve you. they mistreat you. thats why i wanted you to come with me to play varsity in the states, where i’d be the new manager.”

“that doesn’t sound too bad. maybe i’ll just finish off this season first.”

“it’s your choice, but there’s a better opportunity there than however little the myungs have to offer.”

after a few moments you both left the dugout to walk the stadium, passing under the bleachers and beyond the closed food stands before finding a seat with a good view of the field, and the sunset.

you stayed there at the stadium with him for a little while longer before you get up, telling him you have to go.

“i know they have no chance of advancing without you. he has to let you play. you’ll hit me a homerun won’t you?”

“always.” he chuckled. “it’ll be going, going, gone.”

[berylcups]

La Squadra x Reader: What makes them laugh

CW: suggestive behavior (Melone being Melone), getting scared, food, spicy food, annoyed pets( no pets real or imaginary were harmed in this post), gamer rage, language barriers, minor DNI

Notes: some of the videos suggest may or may not be offensive to you or your morals (mostly referring to cart narcs and some Gi Joe PSAs) so please view at your own discretion and mental health in mind! This is a post made for funsies and not meant to harm in anyway. Humor is subjective and as someone with privilege but also is AuDHD there maybe somethings I overlooked. Just know that Beryl loves you all and cares about you all 💜 Also regarding Prosciutto…he might be a little OOC. The only real humor I could see him having is like boomer humor or political humor but that is such a gross yucky subject and I want to keep this post as positive as possible. I hope I did him justice! I hope you enjoy either way! 💜 Beryl

Risotto

What type of humor do they have?: dark humor/ jump scare reactions

How do they laugh?: he has a low deep rumble of a chuckle when he does laugh it almost sounds like an evil villain’s laughter. It’s a little intimidating! But don’t tell him that we want him to laugh more! 🖤

Anything you do make them laugh?: anytime something makes you jump he can’t help but let out a chuckle. Whether someone shows up in your line of sight suddenly and it startles you, or a loud noise makes you scream like a crack of lightning.

You were in the kitchen of the base sneaking a piece of a cake, you knew nobody else was home so you could easily steal the last piece of strawberry cake. You felt so evil, you couldn’t help but giggle to yourself!

As soon as you took a forkful and put it near your mouth, a flash of lightning struck and you felt a massive hand on your shoulder with hot breath on your neck.

“…that’s the last piece…I hope you plan on sharing it Y/N…” you heard a deep voice rumble.

The pure rush of adrenaline jolted through you like the lightning outside and you jumped up, dropping the plate and letting out the most high pitched pathetic screech. The plate shattered all over the kitchen floor completely ruining the cake.

“Damn it Risotto! Don’t scare me like that!” You whined. “Stop being invisible and show yourself!”

He chuckled as he revealed himself, he had a rare shit eating grin on his face.

“Sorry… I really couldn’t help myself. It was the perfect opportunity to get you like that.” He snickered as rubbed your head.

“Sigh…I’m happy that you are enjoying yourself. But I almost peed myself and I dropped a perfectly good piece of cake.” You whined.

“Well I hate to say it but karma is a bitch. That’s what happens when you try to sneak off with the last piece.” He smirked as he got out the broom and dust pan.

“And I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for you being a creeper.” You huffed.

What types of videos make them laugh?: jumpscare reactions- especially if it’s older people playing the scary maze. He thinks it’s hilarious! But he feels bad when he sees little kids get scared, that’s not funny to him 😞 any kid age 12+ though is fine with him- it’s time for them to grow up 😈

Any examples?: nothing specific- look for videos of people getting tricked into getting jump scared 😅 like scary maze, the video of the car driving down through the hills, FNAF, etc.

Formaggio

What type of humor do they have?: funny memes/ voice over parodies

How do they laugh?: he starts off with a goofy low deep chuckle then as it progresses it turns into a roaring laughter where he’s gasping and holding his stomach. Very infectious 🤭

Anything you do make them laugh?: This guy is all giggles! It’s never hard to make him laugh. But his favorite thing is when you reference his favorite videos.

“Hey hey hey~! Get off the counter Asiago!” You scolded the cat. The grey furball turned its butt at you and continued to prance across the counter. “Oh? We’re playing this game huh? Don’t make me give you a body massage~…”

“Who wants a body massage?”you asked in a deep voice, picking up the cat off the counter before she could escape.

“Mister body massage machine GO” you aggressively rubbed the cats belly.

“Pfft hey~! Where’s my body massage?” He laughed watching you playfully manhandle the cat.

“Make me some pork chop sandwiches and maybe zaddy will give ya a body massage!” You struggled to say through your giggling.

The cat was fed up with both of your guys bullshit and jumped out of your arms and ran off hissing.

What types of videos make them laugh?: GI Joe PSAs, Jaboody Dubs- he loves silly voice overs of his favorite American cartoons. Taking them out of context and rewriting the dialogue makes him want to piss himself from laughter.

Any examples?: Pork Chop Sandwiches! I’m a computer, stop all the downloading!

Illuso

What type of humor do they have?: “nailed it “ humor

How do they laugh?: He laughs just as obnoxiously as he does in the dub. Its very unflattering and he sounds like a hyena. Despite that, it’s very contagious!

Anything you do make them laugh?: when you tried to make cute rainbow cupcakes and all the colors bled together making it look like an absolute disaster. The icing melted and the rainbow candy wouldn’t retain its rainbow shape...Its just a sugary sticky mess.

“Ha-Nice job. Very well done.” Illuso snickered. “It looks like a leprechaun vomited all over your cake pan!” he howled.

“It looks so fucking miserable! Did you even try???” he cackled. “Next time, leave the baking to me!”

“Oh fuck off Lulu.”you groaned, rubbing your temples in frustration. “Anytime I pintrest anything, it always-ALWAYS goes wrong.”

He wiped the tears from his face as he tried to calm himself down from his high.

“Hey, hey… Calm down Y/N. Baking is very fickle. I’ll help you out next time. You did the best you could. Trial and error is unfortunately part of the baking process” he said rubbing your back.

“I just really wanted some cute tasty cupcakes…”you pouted.

“I could tell. You didn’t let the cupcakes cool long enough before you put the icing on them. That's why it melted right off.” he stuck a finger in one of the cakes and tasted the frosting. “Mmm…still tastes good though. Lets just eat them anyway. Ugly cake is still good cake.”

.

What types of videos make them laugh?: “Nailed it” show, parkour/stunt fails, live tv bloopers/ fails, makeup fails

Any examples?: grape lady falls

Pesci

What type of humor do they have?: cute animal humor

How do they laugh?: he tries to hold back his laughs but fails with an adorable snort. He has a giggle that sounds like pure joy from an angel. 😇 It’s a big belly laugh and it’s hard not to laugh along with him. Hearing his laugh is always going to put you in a good mood! 😁

Anything you do make them laugh?: when you panic and freak out holding an upset octopus that you accidentally caught while fishing.

“lil guppy~! Put down the camera and help me~! Ow ow ow!” You squealed trying to pry to the angry octopuses suction cups off of you.

“My poor precious pearl! Don’t worry! I’ll help you!” He quickly took a few more pictures of your scuffle with the cephalopod and walked over to gently but firmly pull the tentacles off your face and chest.

He wrangled the fuming octopus and gently but swiftly removed the hook from it. He then he quickly dropped it back into its home in the sea.

“Oh thank god… Thank you Pesci. You’re my hero!” You sighed in relief and rubbed the sore spots the suction cups left.

. “You’re very welcome Y/N. I’m just thankful you’re okay. You weren’t in any real danger. Octopus encounters are just really uncomfortable.” Pesci looks at you and your red splotches, making a gentle giggle.

“What’s so funny??” You whined, putting hands on your hips. You were annoyed he was laughing after a moment like this but knowing how kind he was you’d give him a moment to explain himself.

“The octopus gave you a bunch of welts making it look like you have polka dots!” He laughed light-heartedly. “ you poor thing, I’ll have to give you some cream to help your irritated skin.”

“Sigh… I’m so accident prone. Maybe it was a bad idea to join you on your fishing trips.” You pouted.

“No! Not at all!” He said, giving you a big reassuring hug . “ I love having you with me! I want you to come with me all the time!…only if you want to of course.”

“I’d love too.” You smiled. “As long as I don’t catch anymore angry octopi.” You softly giggled.

What types of videos make them laugh?: he loves watching cat and dog videos of them being silly and doing goofy things! He has a wholesome sense of humor.

Any examples?: Today I groomed a new species | the weirdest cat ever. Cat barking like dog. Dog of wisdom

Prosciutto

What type of humor do they have?: instant karma

How do they laugh?: he has a deep, rich laughter. It sounds very indulgent. It starts out with a mild wheeze then a chuckle that rumbles out of his chest. He has a habit to put a hand to his forehead and shake his head before he really starts laughing. If you have a voice kink his laughter might make you start acting unwise 😳

Anything you do make them laugh?: it has nothing to do with his type of humor but you underestimate something. You were weak to heat but you thought you could handle some of Prosciuttos pasta arrabiata. You… couldn’t handle it at all.

You were having lunch with your beloved partner. You were eating Gnocchi Sorrentina and he had Pasta Arrabiata. It looked so good and smelled good too. You wanted a taste.

“Hey Prosci, let me have a bite of your pasta pretty please? It looks sooo good!” You said trying not to drool.

“Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow. “I’m more than happy to share amore, but it’s very spicy. I know you don’t do well with spicy foods… are you sure you want to try it?” He asked.

“I know I’m weak to spice but it can’t be THAT spicy. Your nose isn’t even running and you're not sweating! I can handle it!” You reassured him. “May I have just a bite please?”

He seemed a little wary but he took a forkful and guided it towards your mouth.

“Okay amore. Here you go. Open up.” He said bring the fork closer to your lips.

You opened your mouth happily inviting the food into your mouth. You chewed as you felt your senses overcome you. Perfectly al dente pasta and a delicious tomato sauce tantalizing your taste buds.

“Oh my~! Prosci it’s so goo-“an unsettling sensation overcame your mouth. You felt your nose get runny and the sweat begin to form on your skin. The heat in your mouth has made itself known. You could feel it in all your soft tissues, your throat, and even your teeth!

“So..so hot!” You panicked. You jump up from your chair and scramble to the sink to drink water directly from the tap.

Prosciutto wheezed and let a hearty laugh out of his chest.

“I told you it was going to be spicy Y/N!” He wheezed.

“I didn’t think it was going to be THAT spicy!” You gargled. “Ahh~ the pain won’t stop!”

“Drink milk amore. Fats neutralize the capsaicin.” He chucked as watched.

You slammed open the fridge and grabbed the milk and drank straight from it, not caring it was for Pesci. You’d buy him a new one. You drank the rest of the leftover milk panting hard.

“Feel better?” He asked.

“ Yeah… the pain is gone. But now I’m going to have to worry about my lactose intolerance later…” you panted. “I owe Pesci a new milk jug.”

“We’ll worry about that when we come to it.” He said kissing your forehead.

What types of videos make them laugh?: anything to do with instant karma or people getting what they deserve… he looks like he’d enjoy public freakouts/karens getting what they deserve 😂

Any examples?: nothing specific, maybe CartNarcs? He’d like watching people messing with others and then they end up failing at their pranks or they end up getting served 😅

Melone

What type of humor do they have?: “That’s what she said “/ dirty minded humor & video game humor

How do they laugh?: he starts with a giggle and has a somewhat feminine light laugh. It’s very attractive

Anything you do make them laugh?: when you get frustrated playing video games and falling at them. 😅

You were sitting in front of the tv frustrated. You KNOW if you did enough backwards long jumps in rapid succession you could get through the endless stairs and to the final fight with bowser.

“Ugh… come on! It’s soooo hard!” You moaned in frustration.

“That’s what she said.” Melone snickered as he watched you helplessly try to glitch your way up the stairs.

“Ugh shut it Mel.” You hissed.

You kept trying and trying… no success. Your hands were beginning to cramp up.

“Aaah~! My hands! They’re cramping! Finish already!” You bitched.

“That’s what she said~.” He giggled louder.

“Melone! Not right now!” You barked.

“Now now Y/N… it’s just a game ~” he waved his finger at you.

You got so close, but your hands cramped up and spasmed. You had enough and threw your controller to the side.

“WELL FUCK ME SIDEWAYS!” You screeched. “ I give up!”

“That can be arranged ~” he purred while rubbing your shoulders. “ Calm down Y/N, it’s just a game… if you want you can take frustration out on me if you know what I mean ~.” He said kissing the shell of your ear.

“Sigh. ok, fine.” You giggled. “ You always know how to put me in a better mood.”

What types of videos make them laugh?: video game glitches, bad video game hacks

Any examples?: streamers or lets-players: ex: Vargskelethor, Vinesauce, Jerma, (my top 3 personally!) or overly popular YTubers like Pewdiepie, Markiplier, etc…

Ghiaccio

What type of humor do they have?: typos/ illiteracy/ misheard words

How do they laugh?: he always tries to hold his laughs in a “Pffft” if it’s really funny he wheezes before he laughs hard holding his ribs. It’s rare but he does laugh!

Anything you do make them laugh?: when you struggle to roll your R’s and say an Italian word but in the wrong way.

“Ghia~ can you bring me the pene for the pasta salad?” You asked, chopping the vegetables.

“Pffft what did you say?” He asked holding back a chuckle.

“You know! The pene pasta! The tube shaped pasta with the tip at the ends!” You said trying to be more specific.

“I have a pene but not pene PASTA.” He wheezed. “We have PENNE pasta.”

“Uh duh! That’s what I just said! What’s gotten into you today?” You huffed grabbing the bowl of pasta out of his hands.

“Y/N… Pene and Penne are two ENTIRELY DIFFERENT things.” He chuckled while wiping a tear from his eye.

“They sound the same! You just say the N a microsecond longer. It can’t be THAT funny! So tell me what I’ve been saying!” You whined

“Cock pasta. You said you were making cock pasta. Not very appetizing if you ask me. Penne is what you want to say- that means pen. Hence the pen shape of the pasta.” He snickered.

“So that’s why all the guys were laughing at me when I was raving about pasta arrabiata with penne?! And you didn’t fucking tell me???” You screeched.

The blue haired man crumpled into a laughing mess gripping his sides. “You can’t blame me for that fuck up! It was a perfect Language barrier!”

What types of videos make them laugh?: misheard lyrics and song parodies, Bone-app-the-teeth type compilations

Any examples?: how is prangent formed? Curse of the weggy board

[kangshxrtie]

ch. 22 ⤍ PICK ME

you started your stream with your usual energetic greeting, glancing at the chat as it started to flood in with messages. you leaned back in your chair, smiling, ready to dive into the updates.

"so earlier today, i filmed this video with leeseo and wonyoung," you began, trying not to laugh too hard at the memory. "first of all, never let wonyoung behind the wheel—she scares me. she couldn't keep her hands on the wheel because she freaked out every time the car moved even a little. now, leeseo? that kid is wild. for some reason, she's actually good at driving." you paused for effect. "like, way too good for her age."

user1 idk who even let wonyoung behind the wheel. she's literally scared of driving.

you nodded, laughing softly. "i was wondering the same damn thing," you replied, shaking your head.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ when do i get to drive you? 😏

you raised an eyebrow at the comment. "you driving? should i be scared?" you teased.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ of course not. i'm a great driver!

"i don't know... should i let zuha drive me around?" you asked your chat, knowing exactly how they'd react.

user2 hell no

user3 run yn

user4 ur def not making it out of that one

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i love being a mod. there's so much power here.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i'm banning everybody who said i can't drive!

you couldn't help but laugh at her response. "you can't just ban my whole chat, zuha!"

reinyourheart wait how is kazuha a mod b4 me? i've known u longer

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ 🤷🏻‍♀️ i'm just good like that.

🗡️_yujin_an damn imagine not being a mod

reinyourheart even yujin

reinyourheart she prob doesn't even use it

🗡️_yujin_an actually 🤓☝️ i use my mod powers all the time to run polls. i'm also an og y/n sub so i got mod

reinyourheart y/n plz mod me since apparently you're just giving mod to anybody these days

"i don't trust you enough to give you those privileges."

reinyourheart but u trust yujin???

"well, not really, but she's our leader," you joked.

reinyourheart banning u from my chat now

"that's fine, i never watch your streams anyways," you quipped, earning a playful gasp from your chat.

reinyourheart 😮 fake

"i'm joking. please don't actually ban me," you said, breaking into laughter. as your giggles faded, your eyes caught an interesting question in the chat.

user1 what type of person do u want to date?

the question made you pause for a moment. "i've actually been thinking about this a lot recently," you admitted.

you leaned forward, ready to dive into your answer. "so, first of all, i like someone with a cool and relaxed personality, but they also need to be bright enough to make me laugh—even with the corniest jokes." as you said this, your thoughts drifted toward someone in particular.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i feel like i can satisfy those requirements

you chuckled softly but kept going. "i also want to date a morning person, so they can help me fix my sleep schedule."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i hate sleeping in

"i really hope they can speak japanese too, 'cause i wanna visit japan so badly."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ me

you grinned, ignoring her comments for now. "another odd requirement—i want them to be good at ballet. it's a talent i just really admire."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ me 🙋🏻‍♀️

"oh, and if they look like bae suzy, that's a huge bonus," you added with a nostalgic smile. "she was my ideal type when i was younger."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ pick me! choose mee!

"and another weird one—they need to randomly start stretching or doing squats whenever they feel like it. bonus points if they have abs. that's just..." you sighed dramatically. "so hot."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i literally fit all the requirements

you finally broke, laughing as you read her string of comments. "i don't know if anybody can really line up to all these standards," you shrugged playfully.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ am i even here rn 😞

"y'all, if you know someone who meets all these standards, let me know," you told your chat, laughing at how many people were either playing along or just laughing at the interaction.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ chat suggest me #ynxzuha

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ imma start banning ppl that type any other name

"you can't threaten my chat like that, zuha," you chuckled, reading her messages aloud.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ chat she noticed me

you shook your head, smiling. "but since you're here, what do you think of all these suggestions?"

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ idk but i think that kazuha girl is pretty cool. i think u wld like her

you pursed your lips in thought. "hmm... i don't really know. i'll have to think about that one."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ trust

"i guess i'll trust you," you said, playing along. "but what are you doing right now? you should join me."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i cant im filming leniverse rn

you gasped. "what do you mean? stop watching me and go film!" you teased, mock-scolding her.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ we good. they're not rdy yet

"alright, just don't get into trouble because of me."

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ talking to u is more important tho :/

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ nobody tell chaewon i said that

"there's a reason i act the way i do—it's because she says stuff like this," you said with an exaggerated sigh.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i miss u lets hang out soon

"we literally hung out yesterday," you reminded her, laughing.

user5 u did?

user6 i miss when y/n updated us

you nodded, leaning into the camera. "yeah, because we filmed the collab!" you added, catching yourself before revealing too much. "when will that be posted, zuha?"

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ shld be posted next week

"okay, tell your team to edit me well," you said with a grin.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i will.

🗡️k_a_z_u_h_a__ i hv to film now talk l8r

"bye, zuha!" you waved dramatically, just as you got a perfectly timed message from yujin that she was almost ready.

"so, today we'll be playing games with yujin, who should be here soon," you announced to your chat. no sooner had you said it, you heard the familiar ping, signaling that yujin had joined the call.

"y/n, why didn't you warn me?" yujin exclaimed, her voice full of exasperation.

you blinked. "what do you mean?"

"leeseo just showed me what you all did in the video today."

"oh, that! yeah, she's crazy with it," you laughed, remembering the madness.

"she was all like, 'you wanna see what i learned?' and i'm thinking, sure, why not—'cause i'm actually curious about what y'all filmed. next thing i know, she reverses fast and does a freaking j-turn. i've never been so scared in my life."

"she did it first try, too. i was just sitting there, in shock."

"i just wish i had talked to wonyoung first," yujin muttered.

"i'm so glad you're the driver in the group. no way we'd be alive if wonyoung was behind the wheel."

"oh, absolutely," yujin agreed quickly. you both laughed before getting connected to the game, ready for the chaos that would follow.

zuhasgf connected

as soon as yujin's character appeared in the game lobby, you rolled your eyes, and immediately opened the menu, kicking her out without hesitation.

"alright, i'm in the game," she announced, unaware of what you'd just done.

"huh? y/n, did you just kick me out?" yujin's voice sounded confused.

you tried to act innocent. "wait, why'd you disconnect?"

yujin groaned, realizing. "you literally just kicked me."

"i think you need a new username," you replied.

"i can't get back in—did you ban me?" yujin chuckled.

"don't blame me because you can't get in the game," you said.

zuhasgf connected.

you immediately kicked her out again, this time banning her completely.

"y/n!" yujin yelled in disbelief.

"i told you to make a new username. i'm not accepting this one," you said firmly.

"just unban me!" yujin demanded, still laughing.

"are you trying to join with the same character?" you asked.

"yeah, did you unban me?"

"...of course," you lied smoothly.

once yujin finally decides to change her name back to normal, you two load into the game, the screen fades in, revealing your pirates standing confidently on a dock, the vast ocean stretching behind them, with a rugged ship rocking gently in the harbor.

"i don't have a shovel, so you're gonna have to do all the digging," yujin lazily announced.

"yujin, if you don't put some type of work in, i might actually fight you," you shot back.

you walk off in the opposite direction when you spot something off in the distance. "there's a ship here," you inform yujin.

she started her pirate roleplay. "arghh! i'm on my way!" yujin replied in a raspy pirate accent, rushing toward the ship with exaggerated enthusiasm.

suddenly, your screen started shaking violently. "what was that?" you muttered, trying to steady your view.

on the other end, you could hear yujin losing her mind, screaming incoherently. there were no actual words, just pure panic as she mashed buttons in a futile attempt to do... something.

while yujin flailed, you spotted an ocean crawler emerging from the sand. remaining calm, you casually pulled out your gun and shot it. meanwhile, yujin continued screaming in terror about something you couldn't even see.

then, out of nowhere, yujin set off an explosion—right next to you. the entire screen flashed red as both you and the surrounding enemies were blasted back.

"oh my god, yujin! what the fuck!" you yelled, your health bar dangerously low as you quickly ate some food to recover.

"you're welcome!" yujin chirped, completely ignoring the fact that she had almost killed you along with the monsters.

the battle ended, and you both wandered around the island, eventually stumbling upon a mysterious shipwreck. a spectral pirate appeared out of thin air, launching into an overly dramatic speech about ancient pirate lore.

"this is actually the longest speech i've ever heard. argh," yujin groaned.

you decided to pull out a ukelele from your inventory. yujin, never one to be outdone, joined in with her singing about finding the pirate captain, her voice cracking from the strain of trying to stay in character.

later, while you were still outside playing music, yujin's shrill voice pierced the calm.

"three ghost ships!" she shouted.

"let's go. we must go on an adventure!" you replied, dramatically diving into the water, heading for the ghost ship, determination in your heart.

however, as you swam, the tide came in, forcefully pushing your character back. you struggled against the current, while yujin, oblivious, had already made it onto your ship and was sailing away.

"yujin! get your ass back here!" you screamed, frantically swimming after the ship. "i'm literally sinking!"

after what felt like an eternity, yujin finally circled back for you. gasping for breath, you managed to pull yourself up onto the deck.

relieved to be back on board, you stood at the front of the ship, surveying the ocean ahead. you felt the wind in your face, the waves crashing against the hull. surely, yujin could be trusted to steer the ship... right?

but then you noticed something alarming. "yujin... we're gonna crash into this rock!" you said, your voice tense.

"anchor!" yujin screamed, but it was far too late. the ship slammed into the rock.

"we're gonna die on this ship. not even from the battles, it'll be from your terrible driving," you groaned.

"naww, we're good," yujin said confidently, somehow managing to reverse the ship and sail around the obstacle, acting like nothing had happened.

you decided to climb up to the ship's bowsprit, balancing precariously on the beam as the ship cut through the waves. "is standing up here a good idea?" you asked, already knowing the answer.

"argh! of course it is!" yujin replied without hesitation.

"is playing music as we go into battle a bad idea?" she asked, joining you upfront with her accordian, strumming an out-of-tune melody.

you pulled out your ukulele from the inventory, matching her energy, and for a moment, it was peaceful—just two pirates making music.

then, without warning, the water around you started to churn. from the depths of the ocean, a massive kraken emerged, its tentacles towering above your ship.

both you and yujin screamed in unison as chaos ensued. you were flung into the water but somehow kept playing your ukulele, refusing to let the music die.

"it's sucking us in!" yujin shouted, her voice on the verge of panic. "load the cannons! we gotta fight this off!"

"can we even fight this thing?" you asked through fits of laughter, doubting your chances.

you quickly switched to the cannonballs, aiming at the monstrous tentacles, firing off shots as fast as you could. you felt like you were making progress, but then you noticed the ship was being dragged deeper into the abyss.

your screen flickered and went dark with a red outline. "what is even happening?" you groaned as your character faded into the ghostly realm.

as a spirit, you wandered aimlessly, spotting another figure. thinking it was yujin, you approached, only to realize it was a random player—a man who's character gave you a casual nod.

"later, dude," he said, disappearing into the void.

you eventually respawned back with yujin, both of you standing on the remains of your ship, now just floating debris in the ocean.

"well, that was a great sea of thieves adventure. we lost everything," yujin said, pulling out her accordion.

you pulled out your ukulele, shaking your head but smiling. "yeah, it was great."

"the fucking kraken..." yujin muttered.

"literally right before the pirate ship, too," you said.

"literally the most random shit," she added, laughing.

"crazy," you agreed, both of you still basking in the aftermath of the chaos.

"anyway, i guess we have to end here," yujin said, the energy winding down.

"yeah, we do," you agreed, starting the stream wrap-up.

you exited the call with yujin, turning your attention to chat. "alright, chat, it's about that time," you said, leaning back in your chair with a relaxed smile. "i'll be live tomorrow for some more games, maybe with a few friends, but i haven't locked anything in yet."

you glanced at the chat as messages rolled in, then continued. "also, keep an eye out—our channel's dropping a new video soon, so make sure to check that out when it's up. but yeah, that's all for today!"

you gave a casual wave. "thanks for hanging out, and i'll see you next time." with a final smile, you ended the stream.

ALL CHAPTERS !!! | NEXT CH !!!

[meademalove]

Vivi thank you for all you have done, Arsenal won’t be the same without you. 😞 A record breaker, a baller, the goat, the ultimate goal scorer, the list could go on. I’m very honoured & privileged to have played 7 amazing years as your team mate and watch you shine on the daily, which I know you’ll continue to do and shine even brighter. You’ll be missed massively but thank you again for what you have done for this club, LEGEND. We love you 🥹❤️

Via Beth on IG