#what a niiiiight @ god please

[timetohealit]

Take me back to the night dmd was dropped on us out of nowhere

[legiterallylunar]

i lied i can't pick a favourite. anyway here's my list of yummy harmonies across the entirety of falsettos!!

so i've realised after writing this that i've basically just written down every time there's overlapping voices LMFAOO it's just cos the harmonies are so good UGH. this is about to be the longest post ever under the cut i'm so so sorry

MARCH OF THE FALSETTOS:

- OOOOOOOOOOOOH!! from four jews i actually cant it's so fun

- five JEWS!!!! the last part of four jews in a room bitching UGHH i lovr it

- will you be my valenTIIIIINE!! in a tightknit family/love is blind. self explanatory. i've been saying this for years (approximately a month). it's so good. i literally cant get enough of it. it's so delicious. this harmony satisfies something deep in my soul

- loove is bliiiind when they all join in and build it up (in the proshot it's the exact moment where jason joins it and the camera zooms on him)

- passion DIIIIIIIES -thrill of first love. self explanatory

- loooooooOOOVE! at the end of thrill of first love YUMMM yum it's so good

- whaat a mess this is this family//photographs cant capture our magic i just love it so much

- whizzerrrrrr!! in everyone tells jason to see a psychiatrist. this isn't my fav harmony if i'm completely honest but it's cool anyway

- late for dinner late again late for dinner late again late fr dinner late again late for dinner late late late late!!!!!!!!!

-I MET THIS MAN TODAY

- RICH MARVIN WHICH MARVIN!!!

- the whole why marvin try marvin bit from in this had better come to a stop UGH

-this had better come to an EEEEENNNNNNDDD!!! (both times obvi. it's so yum)

- honourable mention to im breaking down. she ate that up i love her

- why don't i/you feel alright for the rest of your life (the first time jason and mendel do it together and they go respectively up/down on the harmony) UGH it's so yum

- feel allRIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! at the end of jason's therapy UGH it's so good from the end of please come to our house

- i want- i got- i want it ALLLL from a tight knit family reprise I LOVE IT

- actually all of mendel and marvin in that section ITS SOO GOOD

- four men marching but NEVER MINCING!!

- ALONE IN THE NIIIIIGHT!!!!!!! i just am so obsessed with the way this sounds it's so scrumptious

- marching HOOOOOOME!! i love. i eat it up every time

- life's a sham and every move is wrong!!we've examined every move as we move along!! - chess game. it sounds good. not my personal fav and not one that makes me go WOW but solid and nice and i like it

- you are not required to phooone!! (and basically most of trina and mendel in makinh a home i jsut forgot to write each specific bit down)

- making beliieeeeve!!:(( when whizzer joins in making a home UGHH

- could/should he/she looovee meeeeee?:( it sounds so good omg

- HOWEVER sorry i want to say i don't really like the 'makiiing aaa' harmony that trina and mendel have near the end of making a home i'm sorry it's so dissonant and weird maybe it's a symbolism thing but it doesn't sound right

- not a harmony but !! honourable mention to the key change in the games i play

- pseudo-romantic and sick! from marvin hits trina i love that it's so fast

- we had fiiights and games!, marvin called us funnny names! from marvin hits trina it just sounds so nice in my ears

- help us ALLLL!!!! in i never wanted to love you OH MY GOD. i cant get enough of this one

- he's MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! in i never wanted to love you OMG i love this one so much especially with marvins melody over the top UGHHH it's so good it's so so good

- loooooveeee!!! youuuuuu!!!! - at the end of i never wanted to love you

ok that's it. time for act 2!

FALSETTOLAND:

- literally all of falsettoland i love this song as an intro omg

- give these handsome boys a hand!!

- welcome to falsettolaaaaand

- ooooh the 80s!

- (march march march of the falsettos march of the falsettos -what a world we live in) ooooooooooahhoooo!!! swanky lesbians!!!

- congregate in central park!

- what a world we LIIVE INN!!!

- HOMOSEXUALS!

- welcome to falsettoLAAAAAAAAAAND!

- it's about time! it's about time! it's about timeee!!!

- thiiiis is the yeaaar of jason's bar mitzvah!

- THIS IS THE YEAR OF YHE CHILD WHEN HE SPREADS OUT HIS WINGS (god i love this one so much every single time they do it)

- MYYYY CHIIIIIILD

- we'll have flowrrs galooooreee!!

- tuxeeeedooooos!

- WHAT A DAYYYY TO TEMEMBER

- UGH i love the year of the child bro it's so good YUM .

-YAY THE BASEBALL GAME (can you tell i'm doing this act's harmonies in real time while i watch it LOL)

- WE'RE SITTING! AND WATCHING JASON PLAY BASEBALL!

-we really wish he'd take this more seriously.

-up batting! and batting bad!!!!!

- SLIIIIIDE JASON!! SLIIIIIIIIIIIDE

- we're sitting! and watch the kid as he misses we're watching marvin throw kisses!!!

- boys field boys bat boys this boys that watchinh JASON!!

- my life would be! boring as shit.😔

- please god don't let me make the SAME MISTAKE!

- jason hits! THE BAAAAALLLLLLLL

yippee a day in falsettoland

- honourable mention to NOW I JUST SNOOOOOOORE!!!

- and the obvious EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT

- DOO YOU KNOWWWWW!!!!!

- anything you do is alright!

EVERYTHING WILL FEEL ALRIGHT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!

FEEL ALRIGHT FIR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!

EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT

- what you mean you don't want a bar mitzvah???

how do you think we feel about that?????

- rather than humiliate her killing your mother is the merciful thing to do!😨😨

guys actually i cant deal it's what more can i say. someone kill me. i've gone insane. sorry back to harmonies.

- something bad is haaappeninh.!

- spreading spreading spreeeeaaaadddinngggg!!! ROOOUUUNNDDD!!!! from something bad is happening i LOVE charlotte and cordelia

- the backing 'everything will be alright' vocals after whizzer collapses :((((

- WHIZZER HELLOOOOOOO with charlotte and jason UGH stop i cant deal from days like this

- but toDAY you seem to be! on the way! to recovery!!!!!! with everyone from days like this ARGHHH

- as my heart falls out of SIIIIIIIIIIGHT with trina and mendel OMGG stop i cant . from cancelling the bar mitzvah

- i Looooooooove.. youuu.. with marvin and whizzer from unlikely lovers :(((

- iss it a baaad time!? ...... we'll come iiiiiin! with charlotte and cordelia

-and we need something sweeet!!!

-

- FOUR UNLIKELY LOVERS!!!!

- LEEETS PRETEEEEND!! THAAAT NOTHING!! IS AWWFUL:(

- actually i cant list it all. it's just all of unlikely lovers ITS SO CUTE i cant deal im sobbing on the floor.

-LOOOOOOOOOVEEEERRRRRRRS

special honourable mention to you gotta die sometime obvi

- the WINE is very soothing!!!! from jason's bar mitzvah

- everything is lovely..!:(

- i feel more helpless than i have in years...!

- but he looks... like marrvinnnn!!:(

- and godchild to the lesbians from next dooor!!!!!

omg kill me now it's what would i do

- WHAT MOORE CAN I SAY!

-AFTER BEINV SCREWED OUT OF TODAY

- TELL ME WHATS IN STORE

- ONE HOUR ONE HOUR MOREEEEEE

- IF I HAAAD NOT SEEN YOU

- WHO WOULD I FEASSSTT MY EYES ON

- once i was told that good men get better with aaaage.!!:((

guys actually kill me shoot me in the head i cant go on anymore.

i'm done i'm gone i'm dead and buried. send help

anyway that's it hope u agree (or disagree please talk to me i need to discuss). yay falsettos!

[harmonictechnicality]

Hiyaaa, don’t mind me sneaking back into your inbox, just here to resurrect an ancient meme as you work on a fic that everyone loves to pieces— *trips over a yellow Steve sweater someone left lying around, index cards full of compliments and questions fall out of my pockets* o h oh my god,

Well, if you’re still answering questions, inquiring minds want to know about 4, 13, 49, 43 💕 also bonus to 13, are u a pudding person or a jello person? Or are u the worst kind, a jello person who Thinks they’re a pudding person like Eddie in memory logs? (Yes this is is a riff on low/high maintenance in When Harry Met Sally sue me)

(ALSO a little funny anecdote for u, I opened up tumb in class one night (as you do) and your post about Steve’s slutty Dr Seuss experience in Threshold was at the top of my timeline and the person sitting next to me went: 😳 hahaha)

Why hellooooo again, I hope this fine friday is treating you well!! AGH the Steve sweater is KILLING me!! (I am forever bowing down to the costume designer that chose that particular sweater, they deserve a trophy. a sweater trophy.) 4. which cryptyd being do you believe in?

I'm a pretty open minded person that thinks just about anything is in the realm of possibility. That being said, I would saaaaay my favorite cryptid is good ol' Nessie *avoids twilight joke like the plague* 💙

13. when was the last time you ate?

about two hours ago (whiiiiiite people's taco niiiiight)! OMG the when harry met sally reference - "I just want it the way I want it." "I know. High maintenance." HAHA that part is movie gold!! I am forever a pudding lover. Recently discovered dark chocolate pudding and I don't think I'll ever be the same. 🤤 49. can you skip rocks?

no i WISH!! but I can say the alphabet backgrounds.... (this is not even nearly as cool, but it's something??)

43. what’s your take on spicy foods?

I used to haaaate spicy foods. But then I had ramen and discovered my whole life had been a LIE. My tolerance is still pretty amateur, but I will douse my ramen or dumplings in chili oil about any chance I get these days.

LMAO oh nooooo what an unfortunate post to come across during class 😂 It's not even that explicit, it's just soooo weird haha oh my god that makes me laugh so much! Please have an incredible rest of your day and apologize to that poor person on my behalf 🤣 💕💖💕

[spadebrigade]

eyes on you - sfw version

author’s note: hello! this is “eyes on you”, a version of my fic on ao3 that has the smut cut out. click here for the original, which also has the tags + summary

author’s note (continued): please note that this is a sequel to my longer work, a fortune i couldn’t foresee. but you don’t need to read it in order to understand this one shot! 

we begin with this song. now onto the fic: 

This was his moment. Kuroo closed his eyes, took a deep breath. It only took one phrase to spark a revolution, one song to set a nation’s heart on fire. And he was just the person to take on this challenge, delighting in the water droplets as they cascaded over his bare body. Taking in one more deep breath, he belted out:

“I love you, baaaaaby, and if it's quite alright

I need you, baaaaaby, to warm the lonely niiiiight~”

For the world to hear. Well--for Kenma to hear his terrible singing through the noises of the shower running in their shared apartment. He was just getting into the nonexistent music, singing excruciatingly slowly while he lathered his hair into a mohawk, before he stopped. 

Why hadn’t Kenma banged on the door for him to shut the fuck up yet? Between the awful singing and the cheesy lyrics, he’d expected his boyfriend to have a complaint by now. 

Rinsing off the remaining suds, Kuroo hummed the rest of the song to himself. He still couldn’t believe that he and Kenma were dating. All those years he’d been in love with his best friend, and it turns out it’d been mutual the whole time? He shook his head, muttering “what the fuck” to himself. But he couldn’t bring himself to be too mad about it, because they were together now. And as was his right as both boyfriend and best friend, he was going to annoy the fuck out of Kenma.

He slung a towel over his waist, not even bothering to dry off the drops of water that ran down his chest. He had far more important things to worry about, like bursting into Kenma’s room without knocking.

“What are you up to?”

Kenma sat in his desk chair with his back turned to the door. Kuroo didn’t need to admire him in secret anymore, but it was habit. Some part of his chest fluttered at the sight of his boyfriend so focused on his computer screen, ears covered by headphones and hair piled into a neat bun.

“I’m streaming,” Kenma said, occupied by some fantasy world on his monitor.

“What are you playing?” Kuroo stepped into his personal space, leaning forward and dripping water onto the keyboard.

“Oh my god.”

It was the utter disbelief in his voice that made Kuroo look up, to see wide honey-brown eyes. “What?”

“You’re half-naked and my camera is on.” He gestured to the stream of comments running across the screen. Kuroo caught a “WHO IS THAT” and plenty of tongue and water emojis.

“Oh.” He’d already forgotten he was in a towel. “Well--” He hadn’t signed up to perform for such a wide audience today, but he was going to deliver. “I gotta give the people what they want...Check out these guns.” He posed, flexing his biceps and making kissy faces at the camera.

“Get out,” Kenma pushed him out of the camera’s range. “You’re going to get me banned for pornography.”

He threw his head back into a hyena laugh, making his way towards the door. He was giddy, having achieved his goal of annoying Kenma for the day.

On his way out, he heard his boyfriend speaking into the mic: “The chat is being too much today. That’s just my roommate.”

Kuroo clicked the door closed. Right. Just his roommate.

When he sat at his desk later, trying to study, he knew that Kenma hadn’t meant it that way. They were boyfriends, and they were out as a couple to practically everyone they knew (Bokuto and Hinata had been particularly happy to find out, insisting on double dates that Kuroo agreed to and Kenma was horrified by). But Kenma was a Youtuber and hadn’t yet told his audience, for a number of reasons.

One was for their privacy. As Kenma had explained, “If my fanbase finds out I’m dating someone, they’ll have a lot of opinions about it. And that’s not something I want to deal with until I have to.”

And Kuroo understood that. But there was one reason that he wasn’t exactly comfortable with.

“Plus,” Kenma had said on that cold night when they were both sitting on their hard lump of a couch, “Yuuji and I have this whole thing going on right now. He’s been desperately single for a while and the fact that it looks like we might be dating is helping his views, and mine.”

Now, Kuroo chewed the end of his pen. He and Kenma hadn’t even been together that long, but he felt like he was already putting on a suit for the funeral of their honeymoon phase. When they had finally gotten together, the world didn’t stop for them--Kuroo had to pay attention to his exams, and Kenma had to pay attention to his Youtube career. 

So much attention to his Youtube career. If he wasn’t recording a video, then he was editing another video, or streaming. At least Kuroo got to tag along when Kenma vlogged something, though he’d only be there to help with the camera. 

But there was one thing he felt good about: they were going to have a Movie Night, a semiregular tradition that neither of them ever skipped. They’d take turns picking bad movies and Kenma would order some food, and Kuroo would cook something healthy in an attempt to balance it out. Last time, Kenma had chosen a film about a murderous car tire and this week, Kuroo planned to outdo him with a 2002 3D animated Christmas movie that was sure to be a heap of hilarious garbage. 

Once he’d finally finished balancing the last of the chemical equations, Kuroo found himself in the kitchen, preparing cauliflower. It was a methodical process; washing, chopping, baking (even though their oven kind of sucked and raised the temperature of the entire apartment). He was in the middle of it when Kenma shuffled out of his room.

“Are you cooking?” He tilted his head, sniffing the air.

“Yeah, I found this dope recipe. It’s gonna be so awesome, you’re gonna have to like vegetables.”

“Right,” Kenma snorted. “Listen, I have to skip the movie tonight. I’m gonna hop on Yuuji’s stream and it’s gonna take a while.”

“Oh,” Kuroo said in a voice that he hoped covered the sound of his heart dropping to the bottom of his chest. “Okay.”

“Don’t you have homework to finish anyway?” 

“Yeah.” He watched Kenma pluck an apple off the counter and disappear into his room.

Kuroo was left alone with the cauliflower. He lifted the bowl towards his face, staring at the zombie broccoli. “You still like me, right?”

It didn’t answer. He would have been worried if it did.

He continued cooking in silence. One missed movie night wasn’t a big deal, right? They could watch movies any time.

Or that’s what he told himself as laughter echoed from Kenma’s room. 

                                                               ≡

Kuroo thought that he could shake off these negative feelings, but they stuck to him like a wet paper towel. 

He’d never been the jealous type in relationships. When his middle school girlfriend confessed that she liked another boy, he let her go with no hard feelings. With all his one night stands, he’d never felt possessive. If anything, he preferred to leave before he or his partner could marinate too much in their shame. But then again, when he’d been with all of those people, his heart had stayed behind in Kenma’s hands.

The word “jealous” left a rotten flavor in his mouth, but he couldn’t deny that was how he felt. When he went back into his room, pulling his laptop towards his face way too close like a preteen looking up boobs, he started researching this Yuuji that Kenma was spending so much time with. The Wikipedia page popped up on Google:

Full name: Yuuji Terushima

Occupation: Youtuber

Alias: PartyHair

Sliding in earbuds, Kuroo clicked around his channel. Immediately, his latest video began to autoplay.

“Welcome back, everyone! It’s your boy Yuuji…”

Kuroo frowned. This guy was fucking smokin’. A chiseled face, perfectly styled bleached hair, and was that a fucking tongue piercing?

He groaned. It was a secret wish of his to get blown by a guy with a tongue piercing. What if it was Kenma’s too?

A voice in his head told him he was being a total dumbass right now. And obviously, he didn’t think that Kenma would ever cheat on him--or actually leave him--based on who around him happened to be hot and have piercings. But Kuroo was still fucking mad about it.

After watching over an hour’s worth of PartyHair’s videos, Kuroo had brewed himself a fat pot of Old Man Grumpiness, complete with a dash of edge and a sprinkle of angst. One that he was still letting simmer when Kenma peeked into his room later.

“Good night.”

“Night,” Kuroo borderline growled, curling up under his blanket.

Kenma quirked an eyebrow in response. “I think you need to sleep.” 

Sending incoherent mutters in response, he heard Kenma quietly click the door closed.

Kuroo would be damned if he waited his whole life to get this boy’s attention, only to lose it in a matter of weeks.

But he was still being a little bitch the next day, as Bokuto noted when they got lunch together.

“I’m not being a little bitch,” Kuroo crossed his arms, watching with annoyance as Bokuto scarfed down a burrito. “I’m just--I’m just pissed that he’s spending so much time with some other dude, y’know? We’ve only been dating a few weeks. Shouldn’t our hands always be in each other’s pants?”

Bokuto nearly choked, letting out a boisterous laugh. “Why the fuck would you assume that?”

“I don’t know!”

He shook his head. “Dude, if it really bothers you that much, why don’t you just talk to Kenma about it?”

“Because I don’t want him to think I’m some kind of possessive creep.” He leaned his cheek on his hand dejectedly.

“But you are some kind of pos-”

“Thanks, Bo, I get it.” He stared down at his untouched food.

“Look,” Bokuto gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze, “relationships are about communication, right? I always tell Akaashi what’s on my mind.”

“Yeah, I know.” Kuroo had heard plenty of times, from Akaashi himself, how it could be a little overwhelming to hear every passing thought about is it possible for two people on opposite ends of the universe to experience sunrise and sunset at the same time? And sometimes it was things like what do you think dirt actually tastes like? 

“Me and Kenma don’t really work that way.”

Bokuto grinned knowingly. “Kuroo, which of us has been in a successful long-term relationship?”

He groaned, knowing exactly where this was going. “You.”

“And which of us was miserable until he listened to my genius advice to confess to Kenma?”

“Me…”

“Exactly,” Bokuto shot off some finger guns, before stealing some food off of his plate. “So maybe listen to the love expert this time around.”

He hated the fact that Bokuto was right, that he actually knew more about these things than Kuroo. But he didn’t need the reminder to know that Bo was an expert in loving people, was just natural at being adored and loved by everyone in the room. Kuroo, on the other hand, was not that kind of person. He was a little shit--and glad to be. But he didn’t want to only be a little shit to Kenma. He wanted to be a very nice shit, that smelled like roses. That you might want to cuddle with during a cold night. Okay, he was bad at metaphors.

                                                              ♠

Kenma slid a hand over his face. “There’s more?”

He’d found himself having a peculiar problem ever since Kuroo had wandered into his room with a towel on. The entire internet was thirsting over his boyfriend.

The chat was spammed with comments, and within a few minutes, his Twitter was flooded with screenshots of Kuroo’s abs.

ana_the_beara: who the f**k is this hottie?! @ kodzuken

kr1kit: @ kodzuken says that’s just his roommate…

chanchan28: oh my god they were roommates

Kuroo had wandered into his room for all of one minute and now he had to deal with hundreds of thirst tweets, questions about his dating life, and speculations about Mr. Wet Abs’ identity. It was all a bit much for him to handle. (Though he did have to give credit to the people who made memes and edits during the stream, seemingly seconds after the whole thing even happened.)

He had a ton of damage control to do, especially considering how he and Yuuji were supposed to be dropping hints that they were together. He hoped that the other Youtuber wouldn’t be mad about it.

“That’s actually so funny,” Yuuji laughed on their phone call, scrolling through the memes. “But it could be a big help! It’ll, like, make more noise, y’know? Get people talking, which will get us more views.”

So that was one thing he didn’t have to worry about. But this whole “possibly-dating-other-online-people” business was starting to feel like more trouble than it was worth, as much as he liked hanging out with Yuuji. 

How long did this have to go on for anyway? He’d much rather spend time with Kuroo. Speaking of Kuroo…

Maybe he could go for a movie tonight. So what if his homework was a day late?

                                                              ♠

Kuroo was on the couch with his laptop, in the middle of solving equations that he should have done earlier, when Kenma walked into the living room.

“Hey, I have some free time. Want to watch a movie?” He settled in beside Kuroo, criss-crossing his legs.

He glanced at Kenma, before returning his gaze to his laptop. “I have work to do.” Shit, that’d sounded too sharp. Now Kenma was looking at him with furrowed brows. “It’s...homework.” He added awkwardly, as though that explained his terrible mood.

“Are you okay?” Came the inevitable question, gentle as it always was, laced with concern.

‘I’m fine,’ was what he’d wanted to say. That was not what came out.

“Oh so you want to hang out with me just because your schedule cleared up?”

He got a look of bewilderment in return, and looked away, his skin heating with embarrassment and anger.

A hand reached over and Kenma slowly closed his laptop, looking at him directly. He couldn’t bring his eyes to meet that catlike gaze.

“Are you saying that I don’t make time for you?”

There was the question. The confrontation.

“Well, you don’t.” As he said it, he felt like a petulant child, throwing a fit over nothing. But he couldn’t stop himself.

“Kuro, we’re both in a busy time right now. You know that.” His voice was measured despite the irritation that colored it.

He turned now, arms crossed and eyes glaring. “Why don’t you go hang out with Yuuji?” He spat the name.

Kenma blinked. Processed. “...You’re not seriously jealous of Yuuji?” Halfway between a question and a statement.

His shoulders scrunched as he sunk into the couch, silent.

                                                              ♠

“Oh my god. Is that why you've been acting so weird lately?” He took Kuroo’s silence as an invitation to invade his space, gently pushing away the laptop and scooting even closer.

“You’ve been spending so much time with him! And half your followers think you’re fucking.”

“What does it matter if they think that when I’m fucking you?”

Kuroo huffed, turning his head away again.

“Kuroo, what does it matter when you’re the only person I masturbate to?”

He whipped his head back immediately, overcome by a blush that had already infected not only his cheeks, but also Kenma’s.

“I’m the only person you masturbate to?”

Now it was Kenma’s turn to look away. “I--I’ve been into you since forever. You already know that.”

He grinned. “But this is another level, kitty cat.”

Kenma groaned in frustration, his tied-back hair unable to cover the embarrassment on his face. “I’m out of here.”

“Kenma,” Kuroo said, in both shock and amusement at his boyfriend’s reaction. He didn’t have time to say anything else before Kenma was off the couch, out the room--

“Hey!” He scrambled to his feet, following after him. Kenma was fast, but not fast enough. Kuroo caught his hand in the hallway. He was anticipating a struggle, but didn’t receive one--Kenma’s face was turned away, but their hands were nonetheless linked together.

He led his embarrassed boyfriend into the room where this whole mess started, walking past the gaming setup and settling on Kenma’s bed. He sat among the pillows, but the bed’s owner settled in the farthest corner towards the wall, pressing his hands to his cheeks as though to absorb the redness.

“I masturbate to you, too.”

The confession relaxed Kenma’s shoulders, but his voice still came out quietly, “I always wondered--” He interrupted himself, shook his head. “Sometimes, I...I heard you doing it.”

Kuroo raised his eyebrows. “Me masturbating?” The answer to his question came in the form of sheepish nods. “...Did you like what you heard?”

“I--yeah, idiot!” 

                                                             ♠

A pillow landed on Kuroo’s face, earning his laughter. A devilish smile grew on his face. “Well, if you liked that song, I can give you a concert.” He was already shrugging out of his shirt. “You’ve got the best seat in the house.” 

Maybe Terushima had a sexy piercing and some of Kenma’s time, but only Kuroo had the honor of gracing his boyfriend’s fantasies. And he was going to prove just how grateful he was.

“Did you see the news articles about your little display in my room?”

Kuroo snorted as he settled back, getting comfortable. “Did I make you jealous?”

“No,” he answered too quickly, crossing his arms. “Idiot.”

He let out his dorky hyena laugh, which, to Kenma, somehow sounded sexy. Before he could say anything else, Kuroo put on an enticing, yet filthy show for him to watch, which he may have participated in. Which may have involved a fantasy of a steamy shower in a lake house that they’d visited as kids.

When the show was over, they both settled back against the pillows breathlessly.

“Kuroo,” He began with a quirked brow, “if you were thinking of shower sex, then why set it in the cabin?”

He felt Kuroo’s chest shake as he laughed. “You’re finding plot holes in my masturbation fantasies?”

“Well, yeah.”

“It’s because...it’s scenic.”

Kenma scoffed at the obvious lie. “Come on, you’re clearly in a sharing mood today.”

“All right,” Kuroo sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “It’s because that summer...when we first visited that cabin...it’s when I first realized I love you.”

His heart skipped a beat. “It was?” Suddenly he racked his brain, trying to remember anything special that happened, any sign that Kuroo’s feelings towards him had changed. But there was nothing. They’d acted like dumb kids during that week away, just like they had every week before that.

“Yeah.” Kuroo smiled. Not that devilish grin of his, but one that was more honest, that spread over his face easily. “It was actually because of your mom.”

“What? Stop joking--”

“It’s not a joke!” He laughed, meeting Kenma’s eyes. “It really was because of her. I wanted to go to the deeper part of the lake without any adult supervision, and she wasn’t having it. It went something like…”

“I want to go in the lake.” Insisted young Kuroo, pointing to the opposite shore. “Me and Kenma wanna see the fish.”

“No, Tetsurou.” Mrs. Kozume tutted. “What if something happens while you’re over there and we can’t help you?”

“But I can swim! I won’t drown.”

She put her hands on her hips. “What if Kenma drowns? Will you be happy if I die from a heart attack?”

“But I didn’t even hear what she was saying,” he chuckled. “Me drowning was one thing, but putting you in danger...that was something I could never risk.”

Kenma had no idea how Kuroo could do it--could make him fall in love more and more.

“I thought about it a lot. But I decided that if someone else drowned--this is gonna sound horrible,” He shook his head, smiling. “If someone else drowned, I wouldn’t be nearly as upset. Except maybe my dad, but. The point is, I cared about you more than anyone else. Your mom must have been happy because I dropped the idea of going that deep into the lake.”

“Can we stop talking about my mom?”

Kuroo broke into another laugh. “Fine, fine. There were a few times at the lake that I thought about kissing you, but I chickened out each time...I really wish you’d been my first kiss.”

Kenma felt his chest expand. He knew how much Kuroo regretted fooling around with other people before they’d started dating. “...You don’t remember, do you?”

He received a curious head tilt in response. “Remember what?”

                                                             ♠

“My eleventh birthday.”

“Wha--” Kuroo broke off his own question in confusion. “I remember your eleventh birthday. It was a few months after we visited the lake. Didn’t we have a sleepover?”

Kenma nodded. “We did. But that’s not what I mean.”

“Enlighten me.”

“All right. But give me the blanket first. I’m cold.”

“Even while resting in my loving arms?” Kuroo sighed dramatically, before pulling the blanket up over them. “There. Now tell me.”

“Okay,” Kenma tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, looking at a spot on the wall. “My mom bought me that cake. Do you remember? The one with the hedgehog on it.”

“Right. Because you liked Sonic, but you wanted him to look like a real hedgehog.”

“Yeah,” He nodded. “And she only told us to eat one piece so we wouldn’t get hyper. But then she went to sleep and we ate mochi instead?”

“Because it’d take longer for her to notice it was gone.” Kuroo grinned.

“You got this bit of chocolate on your nose. And you were laughing about something--I don’t know what it was, but it felt like a light inside of me switched on.”

“Your gay awakening?”

He snorted. “Basically. But that wasn’t what I wanted to tell you.”

“What, Kenma?” Kuroo whined. “You’re leaving me in suspense here.”

Kenma ignored him. “Do you also remember how you said you wanted to stay up all night long? And then you fell asleep at 11:30.”

“Well we were playing volleyball all day!”

He chuckled. “Well...before you fell asleep, we were talking. You asked me if there were any girls I liked.”

Kuroo’s eyebrows rose upwards. “And what did you say?”

“Anyway, Kuroo...have you ever kissed anyone?” Newly-eleven-year-old Kenma asked as Kuroo yawned.

“Me? No.” He shook his head sleepily. 

Kenma turned over to his side, looking at Kuroo intently. Kuroo, with his messy hair covering half his face and his arms tucked behind his head, stared comfortably at the ceiling. 

“Is there anyone you want to kiss?” Kenma asked, his heart beating faster.

“Mm, I dunno.” Kuroo turned over to face him. “I’d need practice.”

“We could practice.” He said before he could think better of the words, his pulse in his ears. He started to think of something to say, to cover it up--

“Mhm.”

Kenma’s breath stopped in his lungs. He scrunched up his face, gathered up the courage, and planted a peck right on Kuroo’s mouth. The world tilted, forever changed.

“...Kuroo?”

The only reply he got was a loud snore.

“No way.” Kuroo burst into laughter, much to Kenma’s annoyance. “I was asleep?!”

“You were, you ass.” Kenma rolled his eyes. “It was so embarrassing.”

“I guess that’s why you never mentioned it, huh.” Kuroo said, pulling Kenma’s hair free from its ponytail to run his fingers through it. He supposed that he was forgiven for the actions of his twelve-year-old self when Kenma hummed contentedly and leaned into his touch. “Actually,” he said with a small smile, “I’m kinda happy that happened. Because it means we were each other’s first kiss.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“And you’re gonna be my last kiss, too.”

“...Kuroo?” Kenma gave him that cute, furrowed-brow look.

“When we’re all old and wrinkly, you’ll still be the only person I wanna kiss.”

Kenma scoffed, turning over. “What a dork.” But there was no hiding the pink that had bloomed on his cheeks.

                                                             ≡

“So,” Kenma said to his camera, leaning back in his gaming chair. “Next question: what is Kodzuken’s sexuality? Ah, I might need some help with this one.” He picked up his phone, dialing a number before putting it to his ear. “Can you come in here? I need you for a minute.”

A moment later, his door opened. “You called, kitty cat?”

“I told you to stop calling me that.” Kenma scoffed. “Anyway, come here. I need to tell my viewers what my sexuality is.” He gestured to the camera.

Kuroo squatted beside his chair, rubbing his chin in thought. “Ah, Kodzuken’s sexuality...well, it doesn’t matter, does it? Because he's mine.”

He suppressed a chuckle, but a smile still leaked from his lips. “Thanks for clearing that up.”

“No problem.” He stood, pressing a kiss to Kenma’s cheek. “Don’t be too long, okay? I’m making dinner.”

“Okay.”

Upon hearing the door click closed, he turned back to the camera. “Well, this answers the next question: who is Mr. Wet Abs?” Kenma waved his hands, knowing he’d later edit in pictures of them together. “He���s not just my roommate. He’s my boyfriend.”

And whatever he’d have to deal with--however many questions, comments, or gaudy headlines--it was worth it.

Ending notes: a million thanks to both my good friend ana and the lovely lauren for beta-ing this fic for me <3 and thank YOU for reading! please feel free to let me know what you think :D

my ao3

my instagram: @ spade.yy

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2010: 35 - 31

35. KEiiNO - “Spirit in the sky” Norway 2019

During the preshow I posited that "Spearwhil”  would be the Rasmussen but as it turned out-

I HEAR YOU CALLING ME AT NIGHT

No, Tom NOT NOW!!! I’m in the middle of my sentence. 🙄 Wait your turn Anyway, it turned out that ‘the Rasmussen’ really ought to be called ‘the KEiiNO’. Observe this Michal-esque rise up the scoreboard:

OutSzpak’ing Spzak. 😍 Let’s be honest though, it was-

I HEAR YOU CALLING ME AT NI-

- COMPLETELY DESERVED TOO.  Fred was especially great, who delivered EPIC yoik solo that I am sure won KEiiNO the televote on the spot. 😍

This particularly pleases me because I was worried Tom & Alexandra (who are both very good performers) would take the spotlight away from Fred, but no did the weakest link pre-show turned not only turn out to be the strongest one, but he was arguable the single strongest performer of finale night. SO PROUD OF THEM ANGELS. 😍 Let us all sing along

*cough* I said, “let us all sing along”

... 

(k Tom, now is ur cue)

I HEAR YOU CALLING ME AT NIIIIIGHT

THE NORTHERN LIGHTS ARE DANCING

HÅ LA HEI LOI LÅ

A lot of the criticism from KEiiNO comes from your typical value-seekers who can only enjoy themselves in public if their shallow trash comes coated in a thick layer of novelty gimmicks and Deep Meaning, so they don’t have to admit to others and themselves than they tune in to have fun, like everyone else. There’s nothing wrong with novelty gimmicks & the like, but applying that standard to everything is taking it a tad too far. Sometimes, simplicity is key and that’s exactly what KEiiNO were: unpretentious, highly-addictive EDM adorned with epic yoiking. 😍 

_______________________________________________________________

34. Gianluca - “Tomorrow” Malta 2013

"Tomorrow” is, to use Gianluca’s own words, a curious delight: I always, always, always forget about it. Then I rewatch 2013 as I do at least once per year, and each time it’s like a Céline Dion song IT’S ALL COMING BACK TO ME and I’m in love again. 😍 “Tomorrow” is such a clever twist of the typical love song by telling the story from the THIRD PERSON PERSPECTIVE by an all-knowing narrator. It’s world’s merriest audiobook. 😍

Naturally, this works because Gianluca has TONS of charisma. He’s one of the most magnetic humans ever on a Eurovision Stage? 

It’s hard to believe that he ages like the rest of us, I’d assume he was birthed fully formed and clothed, at age thirteen, in whatever rests at the end of a Neverlandian rainbow. 

“Tomorrow” could’ve so easily been one of those “Annoyingly Positive songs”, but because he’s so relentlessly jolly, Gianluca injects “Tomorrow” with limitless happy energy, enough to melt the polar icecaps. I am happy that I don’t revisit Gianluca between watches, as I do with others, because each time I rediscover him it’s like finding a four-leaf-clover. 🍀

________________________________________________________________

33. Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov - “Samo shampioni” Bulgaria 2013

IMA LI MLADI? IMA LI LYUDI? TSYALO SELO DOIDE PEITE NE SE BOITE

Let us continue with one of the most glorious trainwrecks EVER in Eurovision. 😍 Of course, this being the GOD-tier the severity of wreckage (aka the Sennek Factor) is even higher than normal. In the case of “Samo shampioni” the messiness began DURING THE PRESELECTIONS. 😍 Okay you may not remember or know this backstory, so allow me to enlighten you:

Okay, so *initially* BNT selected Elitsa & Stoyan and for some reason decided to hold an NF: They introduced: first a terrible rapbomination, second a boring ethnoballad (think Iriao + percussion) and then pulled out an experimental fusion of ethnic bagpipes, polyphonic singing and dubstep, which Elitsa openly pointed as her favourite. 😍 Obviously, the audience had to choose for the latter? NOPE The audience chose the iriao-esque ballad 😍 and in one of the most hilariously open displays of riggage, LESS THAN A DAY AFTER THE NF (and after Elitsa allegedly threw a huge backstage temper tantrum threatening to withdraw LMFAO), BNT produced a statement that was all like “well. we can’t send “Kismet”. 🤓 You see... it has come under our attention that... the songwriter from Argentina (lmao) can’t agree to the copyright terms we demanded of him 🤓but that’s fine because it means we can send “SAMO SHAMPIONI” instead 😊‘ <3333333333333333333333456789 who the fuck is Christer Björkman, fucking NOBODY that’s who. And of course, once “Samo Shampioni” finally got to Malmö it was an utter disaster. 😍 I say "disaster” in the best meaning of the word though. I LOVE when countries showcase their musical traditions, but Elitsa and Stoyan do it so aggressively, BLASTING the unassuming viewer with loud af bagpipe noises, following it up with a menuet of polyphony, a clarion of “AAAAAAAAAAAA-YUUUU” and a finale of dubstep and mayumaniacal percussion. “Samo Sampioni” was loud, abrasive, a clamour of ethnic noise but by the same token such a catchy, infectuous, delightful fucking BOP. No surprise it got jurypwned but it was well worth the effort. 😍

________________________________________________________________

32. Nadav Guedj - “Golden boy” Israel 2015

Welcome to the Dicedrome, ladies and gentlemen: Introducing the man who put Israel back on the map after four straight NQs. But Nadav is more than just a Hebrew Tom Dice. 

For starters, “Golden boy” is also the first time we were ever subjected to Doron Medalie (and also Imri Ziv but lol Imri), who is at his BEST here (apart from that moment when he brusquely shoved Cesár out of the way as if he were Krisse Salminen lmfao 😍): “Golden boy” has everything I could want in an uptempo party song: Drama, catchy rhythm, limitless fun, chanting, dancing and an absolutely ridiculous premise: sixteen year old boy gets wasted after fruitlessly flirting with all sorts of femfolk on his first night out. Yes, THIS

is sixteen years old. 😍 But what I mostly love about “Golden boy” is the humour. Intentional humour is really hard to get right and “Golden boy” NAILS it for me. From self-deprecating one-liners, to that choreography to b-roll material like the sound effect of beer being pourn as Nadav gets further into the song, to of course the epic finale of “THREE MINUTES! BYE :selfie”. 😍

A wild ride which, as serendipity demands, is topped off by Nadav kicking off a strong Israeli streak that indeed ENDS up with Israel winning the contest (with a worse Doron composition :-/) and him showing us around in Tel Aviv. Funny how life works sometimes, huh? 

OKAY GOTTA GO  THREE PARAGRAPHS BYEBYE

_______________________________________________________________

31. Jessy Matador - “Allez ola olé” France 2010

Did you know “Matador” is Eurospeak for “SLAYER”?  😉

Speaking of EPIC party songs, I was looking “Allez Ola Olé” up for my usual ranking purposes and this song.. is one of the most successful Eurovision songs EVER? I am not surprised, because “Allez olla olé” OWNS, but at the same time random 12th placers becoming massive off-season hits <3

(yes I am aware it’s because it was the French “Waka Waka” but that’s even more hilar, actually. What on earth is it doing in Eurovision <3)

Anyway, “Allez ola olé” definitely DESERVES all praise it can get. ETERNAL THORN IN THE SIDE OF THE EUROVISION ELITISTS <3 it is of course the anti-Proud, being all rhythm and no story, literally having no purpose other than making people dance (which I LOVE doing to “Allez Ola Olé”... within the confines of my bedroom, with the curtains closed because I have the dancing skills of drunk JarJar Binks) and honestly, what a spectacle. 😍

It features, in order of ascending awesomeness, male twerking (gender equality <3)

witty references to sex (which I don’t mind here because it’s clearly consentual, and therefore, healthy, ICKOLAS)

“Je sens le truc monter/..😏 ALLEEEEZ 😱”. 

DAM BA DAM BA DAM BA DAM DAM

A fucking HAKA????? (btw, the female backing doing a salute is also lowkey great <3)

Actually, TWO HAKA’S????

This song may not have relevant meaning but my weave flew all the way to French Polynesia. “Allez, ola, olé” is nothing less than fucking AWESOME. 

In this update, we pay our final respects to Norway, Malta and France: Read more about them below:

NORWAY

I don’t feel like this chart reflects my true feelings on Norway, because I like them a LOT more than what their average implies. They’re largely just dragged down by a few bad entries in the first half of the decade. Norway in the second half of this decade has shown a lot of promise and they are on my list of countries that I expect to win in the upcoming decade. 

MALTA

Malta are a very average Eurovision country imo. As you can see, they very often select songs that are not worth giving a fuck about, but conversely the few times that they do, they’re usually excellent happy-go-lucky gems. I could see them winning if they find that rare 1-in-50 entry (by one of their jesc winners preferably), but only if they keep internally selecting their entrant because lmao MES(s)C <3

FRANCE

This is a really good chart for France and roughly what I expected. Not my favourite country but solidly upper tier. France really have reinvented themselves post 2016 and are reaping the rewards with generally higher results. I hope it gets topped off with another win soon. They deserve it. 

[serendipitouscontaminant]

Carol Anne is a little surprised when Josh calls her. Not because he never calls her, he does, it’s just that he’s usually more predictable than ringing her at nearly midnight.

She picks up her phone to reject the call, but, for some godforsaken reason, finds herself hesitating.

Maybe it’s important. It’s not that she’d care if it were important, because she’s pregnant and pretty much in labor, nothing is more important than that at this point in time, but lately Josh has been what he might call overstressed and she might call batshit, and it’s making her feel uneasy.

Besides, it’s impossible to sleep like this, so she’s just watching old episodes of British soap operas on cable, and Josh is way more entertaining than a soap opera, so she answers the phone. “What?”

“Carol Anne Keane,” she hears from the other end. Josh has all the air of a man about to make an announcement, and he doesn’t disappoint. “I am high. On...marijuanas.”

Oh boy. “Why?” she asks in a flat voice, because she has never smoked a marijuana in her life and would never start now.

“Because I’m cool,” Josh says. “I am just as cool as Dr. Rock ‘n Law, if not cooler!”

Of course. “Where did you even find drugs?”

“Anne and Dwayne,” he says unsurprisingly. “They left some here, and I saw them, and I was like, live a little, right? Be cool! Not that I’m not already totally cool, I’m cool, I’m a cucum...bro...that’s not a word. But it should be.”

“No.”

“You’re right. But I looked up how to do a drugs on the internet, and I did it! I did the drugs. All of the drugs. There was paraphernalia and everything and I watched a YouTube tutorial on how to do it, and also one on how to embalm a dead naked mole rat, just in case. And then I watched some videos of people mowing the lawn and, just...there’s art there, in the everyday things.” Josh waits a beat, possibly for her to answer. She has nothing to say to any of that, so he just lowers his voice and whispers, conspiratorially, “I think I got the animals high too. I hope it just relaxes them. You know, they’re freaking out. The bear was recently wounded. Hopefully the drugs will help with the pain.”

“Are you sure you’re not the one freaking out?” Carol Anne asks. She knows the answer, obviously, but she’s willing to continue this conversation, mostly because it’s a little hilarious and she’ll be able to use it against Josh for probably the rest of time.

“No!” Josh says very loudly. “I! Am! Not! I’m not, like, staying awake at night enumerating my failures and ruminating on the mistakes I’ve made in life and yearning for my inevitable staking. That would be weird. I’m not weird.”

Josh is very weird, but Carol Anne’s going to break the news to him when he’s sober, just because it’ll be funnier and it’ll give her a good opening to tell him all about tonight in excruciating detail. Right now, though, Josh’s voice sounds suspiciously watery, and Carol Anne is not interested in sharing the line with a crying man. “You’re not going to get tied to a stake or lit on fire or thrown into Peck Canyon,” Carol Anne says. “And definitely not all three. If anyone tries, I’ll stop ‘em. Hell, I'll put the fear of God into ‘em.”

“Aw! That’s so sweet that you care about my continued existence, Carol Anne Keane.”

Carol Anne is about as sweet as acid, but she lets it go. “You know, if we get married you’ll have to stop calling me all three of my names. Folks’ll ask questions.”

There is dead silence, and Carol Anne can feel her eyes go wide. God, she hopes Josh doesn’t remember this in the morning. Does marijuana make you black out? Please let marijuana make you black out.

(Look, in her defense: out of all the men she’s ever met, Josh would be the best father and the best husband; she’s seen his house, he’d do all the cooking and cleaning for sure, the only negative would be his truly baffling taste in interior design.)

“I assumed we’d hyphenate,” Josh says.

“We don’t do that PC crap here,” Carol Anne says.

"Well, I like your name! All three of them! So much! Because I like you! So much!”

Oh, there’s the untethered emotion that makes her feel uncomfortably charmed. “Tether that shit,” she snaps, but Josh has no idea what she’s talking about, which she must admit is fair enough, as she gave him no context and if there’s something Josh isn’t it’s a mind reader.

“What? What am I tethering? There’s nothing to tether here!” A gasp of horror. “Carol Anne, the bear just looked at me!”

Carol Anne sighs and, unable to help herself, points out the obvious. “You probably just looked at the bear.”

“...Huh. That’s a genuine possibility, I’ll put it in the murder book.”

Carol Anne does not ask.

“I’m tired,” Josh says suddenly. “That’s amazing. I mean, not that I’m tired, I’m tired all the time from the weight of the world and all the information I constantly have to process that I can never seem to keep up with and the lives that are at stake—ha!—here, so that’s not the amazing part, the amazing part is that the implication that my body is giving me is that I am going to be able to sleep. Do you know how impossible it’s been for me to sleep lately? I’ll tell you, so impossible.”

Carol Anne does not mention that he was knocked out for about an hour with her in a courtroom not long ago. She is sure that neither of them want to think about it. “So go to sleep, Josh.”

“Do you think I should become a drug addict?” Josh asks suddenly. “This is fun. I feel relaxed. Sort of.”

“Marijuana is a gateway drug,” she says.

“Objection, that is not an answer.”

“The answer is no, Josh, you should not become a drug addict.”

“You’re right,” Josh says, sighing heavily.

“Go. To. Sleep.” She’s starting to get tired too, and she swears to God that if he doesn’t pass out soon she’s just going to hang up, and then she’d probably feel bad or something, because hormones are a joke.

“You’re right,” Josh says again. “Sleep hygiene is important.” A beat. “Stay in school. I won’t say it again.”

“I’ll think about it. Good night, Josh.”

“Good night, Carol Anne,” he says brightly, and then he lowers his voice to a whisper. “Good niiiiight, maybe-my-baby,” he says. “I’m going to tell you a secret, but make sure not to tell your mommy.” he asks, and Carol Anne practically holds her breath. “Thank you for your understanding. Okay. Here goes. It’s about your mother.” Josh takes a deep breath, and Carol Anne rolls her eyes to the ceiling and asks God for patience with this stupid, stupid man. She’s so busy with that that she almost misses Josh saying, in the lowest voice possible, “I'm a little in love with her.”

Before Carol Anne can even take in the words, she’s alone again in her quiet little house.

Well, not alone.

She puts her hands on her stomach, and the baby kicks.

I'm a little in love with her. 

She sighs. “Maybe,” she says to her almost-daughter, “I’m a little in love back.”

Just a little bit.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15767103#main

[ermojas]

Lucky you, I'm drunk watching TSoT again, cuz i went thru the.list and realized hey what other episodes matter, right? Here we go: The game is, drink whenever you wanna forget s4 and that Mary was never given the chance to be a true villain and mastermind of the Moriarty network thus invalidating her relationship with John and solidifying Sherlock and John's true love: - There's gotta be a faster way to steal gold. - All Sherlock texted was "Help," and Greg brought friggen helicoptors. He's worse than John. - Aaaaahhhh...I almost forgot what good cinematography looks like. - Why does Mrs. H say "you always live alone"? Goddamn EMP, get your filthy paws off my favorite episode. - Oh sure, one of the main characters got married in this episode, but we're not gonna show tge ceremony at all, and his first word spoken will be "Sherlock." - I hate Mary but she's so pretty and I love her dress - David looks like he knows he's gonna be a Surprise Parent in 9,783 fics. - When will we see Harry. When will we see John's bedroom. When will we see the truth. Why is my tequila pink. - Goddamn every time Sherlock and Mary interact it's so purposefully easy. They work. They're like siblings. She's so smart. TST would have never happened. Goddammit. - Whenever I'm about to do something uncomfortably sociable I imagine Mycroft saying "Minnngling...?" - Okay, I get the Greg and Molly thing. He stands so close... - It bothers me that the Best Man Proposal is the only scene we see the kitchen from that angle. Seems like a different flat. - God fuckin damn I love the editing of this whole fucking episode. I need a sandwich. - John flirtily saying "Nnnyess?" while Sherlock is freaking out about the best man thing is downright indecent. - John trying not to cry during the speech is cruel. Let the man feel. - Their entire friendship is contained in John saying "wait til I sit down." And the fact that John reacts to everything in this speech a millisecond before Sherlock says it. Cuz he knows what he's gonna say. Cuz they're meant for each other. I hate this episode. - There is a man bleeding out, Sherlock, control your libido. - He said, abOut the stag night: "There's hoyrs if material here, but I've cut it down to the really good bits." I SEE YOU, MOFTISS. WITH THE EDITING PUN. GIVE US THE GAY BAR SCENE. - I need 12 minutes of the theme i dubstep, please. - Sherlock gets so much campier when he's drinking. AND SO DOES JOHN. - The most interesring thing about the knee grab "I don't mind," line is that it was clearly ADDED IN POST. They organized time to sit Martin Freeman behind a microphone to more clearly Insert. That. Line. Whyyyyyy. Releaseee meeeeeee. - Sherlock drunkenly realizing his hand was behind John's back is EVERYTBING. - "WITH A GHOST MR. HOLMES." Okay so let's not acknowledhe thT this while thing mirrors TAB or whatever. So mucb fake death in tbis show. I wish s4 was fake, cuz that was a death if ive ever seen one - Okay, tbis is definitely a two sandwich problem - WHIP IT OUT, SHERLOCK - I like how Sherlock basically says "no more murder and mystery" and then in ten seconds it turns into a murder mystery. SUCK IT, MARY. - BBC Sherlock shows John Hamish Watson coming up the stairs with groceries more times than it shows him embracing his actual wife. HMMMMMM. - "We would never do that to John Watson," with his deduction face on. They.are both in love with john, and he just confirmed it. - "Oh wbat a niiiiight." I hate this episode.