#what I want characters to be and what I'm willing to inflict on them for the sake of telling a story are 2 v different things

[kazamajun]

t8's despair ending but there's an additional scene where kazuya finds out jun is alive via being served divorce papers

[etherealabyss11037]

What Were They Keeping from Us?

So, I've began rewatching Weeby Newz's livestreams of Danganronpa Another; I'm currently on Chapter 2 during the reveal of the new motive. Here, the 13 surviving students are forced by Monokuma to take a note from a box containing the dark secret of one of their classmates. Only a very few are openly revealed: Kakeru Yamaguchi, Teruya Otori, Mikako Kurokawa, and Yuki Maeda's. Kakeru's secret, as abruptly revealed by Tsurugi, was that "Kakeru Yamaguchi was teased for being too big in elementary school", which is a trauma Kakeru reveals in his FTEs. Teruya Otori's secret, revealed by Kizuna, was that "he still sleeps in bed with his dad"- and of course, who can forget the classic "Mikako Kurokawa might actually be talkative?" as revealed by Yuki when glancing at his note after promising his classmates he wouldn't. Great job Yuki. Speaking of lucky boy, his secret was that "Yuki Maeda might know the identity of the mastermind"- which was true, depending on how you look at it. Regardless, we now have 9 students whose secrets were never revealed, which has always been a bit disappointing. I'm curious to know what skeletons these kids have in their closet- assuming it isn't just something stupid like Kakeru and Teruya.

Firstly, it's important to take into account that one of these secrets is also in the corresponding character's FTEs, so it stands to reason that the same can be applied to the others as well. Another point is that two of these secrets were actually foreshadowing upcoming reveals, so this may also be the case in at least one secret. Some secrets I'll speculate about will be purely based on knowledge about the character in question. Alright, enough with the introduction, let's go!

Akane Taira: I think Akane would have had a similar secret to Yuki- "AkAne TAira miGht kNow tHE IDenTiTy oF thE MaStErMind" and all that jazz. An underwhelming explanation, I know, but I can't be arsed to think of another possibility. Akane without her dEsPaiR memories is pretty docile and isn't the type of person to inflict harm or mayhem unto others, thus I can't see her committing any atrocities that haven't been wiped from her memory. If you have your own idea, please share!

Ayame Hatano: I see it two ways: in her FTEs, we learn she's had problems with her hamstring, which could have severe repercussions on her physical health if she were to push herself too hard when trying to achieve her dream of becoming an Olympic gold medalist. This secret may be more depressing than dark, but Ayame wouldn't like to have this kind of personal issue exposed to her class. However, if we're to be more macabre and use zero canon evidence to support our theory, we could speculate that Ayame's secret was that she had used steroids/drugs to enhance her performance because she feared her ailed hamstring might compromise her skill. This is an act of cheating that, if ever exposed, could result in Ayame being banned from all future competitions, effectively crushing her dream. Now THAT is some tea I could get behind!

Kizuna Tomori: Honestly, based on her final FTE, we learn that Tomori forces her fellow cheerleaders to sleep with the boys that bodyguard her so that she doesn't have to "waste her precious body" in that manner. Aside from attempting to commit literal murder, sexual coercion is the worst thing you can do to someone, so it stands to reason that such a fucked-up secret would be enclosed in one of those notes. If it were revealed to the rest of the class, I highly doubt they'd be so willing to let Kizuna back into their group, if only by virtue of not wanting to befriend what's basically a pimp.

Kanata Inori: This has zero in-universe basis, but I feel like it's fitting for such a sweet character like Inori to have a rather fucked up secret, such as she severely injured or killed a patient while operating on them. It was an accident, of course, but it would still weigh heavily on her tender heart, and I doubt she'd like to be reminded of it.

Kinji Uehara: Using point number two as stated in the preamble, I believe that Kinji's secret would be that he was the traitor working on Monokuma's behalf. Something like that would decimate an already strained relationship with his class, and Tsurugi would definitely forbid Kinji from joining his group after that- hell, Tsurugi might try to convince Kinji to kill himself or try to confine him to his dorm room for the remainder of the killing game. I doubt Tsurugi would show any leniency to Kinji even if he confessed that he betrayed them only to protect the lives of the orphans at his church, which the others may find to be more forgivable. Perhaps this conflict of interest could lead to the Kinjo cult disbanding early? Who knows.

Satsuki Iranami: Idk. This is Satsuki for Christ's sake. This girl has literally done nothing wrong in her life. ever. (Okay, I know she shot Haru, but it was an accident, and she couldn't help it) Like, the worst thing I could ever see Satsuki doing is like stealing candy as a child or some shit (watch Kinjo execute her for that). Girlypop has literally zero malicious intent towards any creature of any kind.

Haruhiko Kobashikawa: that he's a virgin.

Tsurugi Kinjo: Going by his FTEs, Tsurugi has a few skeletons in his closet- but what I think would really alter his relationship to the group would be the reveal that Tsurugi himself has killed. In what I believe is his third(?) FTE, we learn that Tsurugi shot a group of hostages -who were his colleagues from the police station- when they were being used as shields by a group of terrorists attempting a deadly attack in Tokyo. Although this deed was done for the greater good, I think this would be enough for his classmates to finally reject Kinjo's bullshit. He spent all of chapter two ostracizing and vilifying Kinji, Rei and Kizuna and demeaning them as "preliminary criminals" all because they refused to be under his control, yet fucking Kinjo out here is killing innocent people? I think the hypocrisy would send some of his biggest haters, like Haru, over the edge, and the Kinjo cult would disband sooner than it did in chapter three.

Rei Mekaru: that she adores and sleeps with teddy bears at night. Yeah, not exactly a heart-stopping, bone-chilling reveal, but knowing uptight, "I-am-so-mature" Mekaru, she would not be happy for that information to be known to anybody. It would be hilarious to read aloud, though. I get the feeling that Kizuna would never let her hear the end of it once she found out.

Ah, it's nice to fantasize on how the other student's secrets could have impacted the killing game if they decided to be like Yuki and take a peek at their notes. Although this concludes the characters that were around for when the second motive was introduced, I'll throw in a bonus question for y'all creative thinkers: what do you think the secrets would have been for the three students who were dead (Kiyoka and Mitch) or otherwise preoccupied (Kisaragi) and were unable to participate in the killing game?

I hope you found this lil' food-for-thought shitpost enjoyable, and that you have your own thoughts to share on this topic! Have a good day!

[lurkingshan]

I've had all the different Love for Love's Sake interpretations rotating in my brain and kind of picking and choosing what I want to take from each of them, which is a very cool thing we can do with this show because it supports many different reads. I think for me I have landed on a few core ideas that I am stewing on the most:

Is Myungha in control of the game?

One thing I'm feeling pretty solid about is that my preferred interpretation is one where Myungha's consciousness is in control of the game. @jemmo and @biochemjess and @wen-kexing-apologist all offered up some thoughts about this that resonated with me and give me a framework that helps me make sense of the game glitches and server errors as manifestations of Myungha's emotional overwhelm and inability to accept love, rather than a creator forcing cruel choices and punishments on him. I like that idea a lot.

The initial assumption the show invites us to make is that the game world was created by the author based on his own novel, but I don't think that idea holds up as the show goes along. Because if this world we're in was truly based on the novel, I would expect we'd have seen some of it. Instead, we get a world that is populated by Myungha's own significant people--those he loved, those he lost, those he regretted--and no real hints about the novel world we're supposedly in. We never met the novel leads, for instance, or learned that Myungha had pre-existing knowledge of any other characters besides Yeowoon. So that tracks better with Myungha simply pulling his blorbo, the character he identified with most, into this afterlife world he created for himself.

Are Yeowoon and the romance "real" within this world of the show?

Which leads me to the next thing I'm stewing on. Is Yeowoon "real" in any meaningful sense within this universe? Is their relationship? Because functionally, Yeowoon is a mirror of Myungha and a stand in for his own self within the game world. Making Yeowoon happy becomes making Myungha happy. Loving Yeowoon is a form of self love for Myungha. One could argue that because the afterlife feels real to Myungha, it becomes real, and therefore everything that happens counts. But @troubled-mind mentioned in her post that she can't really latch onto the love story in this show because the reality is that Myungha has died and this afterlife is "wishful thinking." As an atheist, that resonates with me, and I think it's perhaps why I was not quite as emotionally moved by the romance ending as some of y'all seem to have been. Don't get me wrong, I thought it was beautiful. But I did not experience this as a happy ending to a love story in the way that some did. More than anything, I think I take it as a final bit of closure, that Myungha was able leave in peace having found some measure of love for himself in his final moments. I don't know that I am sold on the idea this means he is living a whole second life with Yeowoon.

So then, who is the author?

I have also been thinking a lot about who exactly this author is and how he's involved in this game world. @bengiyo suggested that he was someone who loved Myungha in life and created this world out of his own grief, and @twig-tea had suggested to me even before the show ended that the author was trying to help Myungha through the game. I see a logic to these reads, but I can't say either particularly resonated for me, in part because of what I mentioned above re: the cruelty of the game world if the errors are not self-inflicted by Myungha. @crapyouknowme suggested that the author is in fact a manifestation of the star Myungha wished upon, a loving presence that came to him because he yearned for it. I kind of like that idea personally, that this is another form of self-love Myungha willed into existence for himself. @dropthedemiurge wrote that in the end it seems all the text messages of love and yearning were from the author, and I do tend to agree. So under this interpretation, the author appears to Myungha and sends messages of love and guides him back into this game world with Yeowoon because Myungha wills these things for himself. I like that idea that Myungha is ultimately still the one in control of how he chooses to leave the world.

I think ultimately for me, I am arriving at seeing this story as less of a romance and more of a journey to self love and closure at the end of life. I do think there is a hopeful tone to the ending despite how dark the realities of Myungha's story are, and for me that hope is primarily based in his ability to love himself on his way out of this life.

[slightly-warmer-hibiscus-tea]

My Touchstarved MC / OC time

Because I've been saving it for today^-^

[Warning: long rambling, and possibly no editing]

I have come to the point where I view the main LI's as my side characters to my silly little cannon divergent lore. So everything is completely made up, and also I'm going to rewrite my MCs to fit the actual game when it comes out. so there is my disclaimer before I head off into Lala land.

I've made different MCs based on the three backstories you can choose when you enter the game.

The Alchemist (Naudedel)

Hound (Hound)

Unnamed (Noble)

Each is still cursed but each curse takes on a different form or is gained at a different time along the journey to Eridia.

Noble is the one with the original curse from the game. They corrupt the minds of those they touch. Except on rare occasions...

Hound is a by-product of Nobel's hands. Hound is (till they reach Eridia...) the only one who can touch Nobel without punishment. Though she seems to have still retained her sanity, there is one man who refuses to deny the golden veins running under her skin.

Naudedel was an experiment gone rogue. An attempt to create an artificial God gone wrong. Turning his back on his creator, but still tries to reach for a false heaven on his own.

In my little headcanon world, they are all traveling together as a found family. Hound acts as their guardian, Noble is the oldest, Naudy is the weird middle child, and then there is Cetcher, who is a stand-alone OC who was adopted into their little family.

| And here is a little family photo/reference sheet :D - I'll explain the designs later |

Also, designs aren't finalized completely!! (which is why Hound is missing the prosthetic mentioned below)

The General BackStory: part I

Hound meets Noble when they are around six and takes care of them along with the help of her then-husband Cove. The two worked as mercenaries till taking Noble in as their own. The young couple promised to watch over Noble as they travel to Erida to try and find a cure for their curse. Along the way Hound and Cove hit what they called... a rough patch. Which resulted in Cove severing Hound's leg, not before she could take his good arm. Though Hound can't remember much of their life before that fight. She does know that he is still out there, and looking for them. But a swordsman without his dominant hand isn't much concern for her so she pushes on with the child at her side.

That is when they find Naudedel. The prodigy son of a mage who lived at the top of the hill in the remains of a small standing town. The mage was an older woman, but hospitable to the young mother and her child. She was also very taken by Noble after learning about their infliction. And wanted to help them in their journey to Erida seeing she had ties there from her past. This is where Hound was given her prosthetic, fueled by alchemy and mechanics. Noble took a liking to Naudedel despite his moody disposition and the two (to Naudy's dismay) were stuck at the hip during their stay. However, things didn't stay pleasant for long. As if the air changed in the small town, dire truths flowed with it. Hound and Noble soon learned about the true nature of the boy bound to the hill. The 12th experiment, the 12th body that surprisingly hadn't been dropped in one of the many pre-made graves that ran along the hillside yet. "What a resilient boy she's found!" was the last macabre expression Hound was willing to put up with from the townsfolk before marching up that damned hill only to find a darker twist in the doorway. Naudedel was the one to free himself. The one to kill his mother and step off that hill in his own shoes. Hound just happened to walk in front of him. Or at least that's how he is allowed to tell the story.

The now trio continue their journey, arriving in one broken small town to the next. Around the time the young ones are teenagers and Hound is theoretically pushing late 30s yet every familiar face they meet on the road swears she hasn't aged a wink, They start a town riot...

...

However, that's a story for another time. Anyways, the kids adopted Cetcher as their new baby sister. Cetcher worked as an assistant for an apothecary in town. Though assistant is more of a stretch, servant or pet would have been more fitting. The man running the shop treated the child less than an errand boy and refused to elaborate on where he got her. So Naudedel made it his mission to run off with the kid with the ever-so-graceful help of Noble. After convincing Hound to take her in, the glossy-eyed baby joined their one-wagon caravan. With surprisingly great help from Naudedel, Hound taught Cetcher how to read and write, which might have been the start of her greatest joys, at least in the moment.

But they were on their way. And spent another 5 years on the road before getting close to the city. But that was where they would part ways for a year. Naudedel had found a lead to possibly undoing Noble's curse. But it would be out of their way and a possible goose chase. And Due to an unfortunate run-in with a certain swordsman wielding his signature longsword in his non-dominant hand. They needed to get on the move fast. The plan was for Naudedel and Cetcher to go off the path and for Hound to watch over Noble and make it into Eridia safely. This was the plan, but of course, things would never go accordingly. Here we are in the current day, Noble alone in Eridia left in Leander's care, Hound presumed dead, Cetcher lost in the Fogfall, and Naudedel making contracts with deities he is too proud to admit are over his head.

:)

But yes, my cornerstones of my silly found family.

[danvolodar]

Failing to understand the appeal of Astarion

Seriously, I just don't get it. Alright, I'll admit I am rather biased againt characters that put a knife to my Tav's throat in a DM-railroaded introduction scene, and [spoilers below this line]

I am even more biased about vampires who try to drink her blood without consent for no reason at all other than to try if they can, lie about the reasons, kill her if she fails the rolls, and then behave as if nothing happened.

But even then. I've seen Astarion compared to Shadowheart or Lae'zel, who can also resort to lethal violence if Tav doesn't settle their differences with a Persuasion roll. And yet still: firstly, they have much more compelling reasons for their actions than "I wanted to see if I could", and secondly and most importantly, both girls do a whole lot of growing up throughout the campaign, while he apparently doesn't.

Now, again I'll admit these two were in my primary party while Astarion was mostly a bench-warmer, but. They have to leave behind everything they'd been taught before encountering the PC party and make their own moral judgements. When confronted with evidence, they are both willing to change, and the driving force behind that change is largely unwillingness to see what had been inflicted on them to be inflicted on the others. This theme is especially prominent if Lae'zel becomes a parent, and says her son is free to choose whom to become, rather than being forced into being a warrior like she was.

In contrast, Astarion complains a lot about his condition, the torture he suffered at the hands of Cazador, and these are all perfectly valid things to bemoan. But thing is, he's also perfectly willing to sacrifice the rest of Cazador's progeny and ascend. He does not change, unless Tav interferes! And even when he's guided away from that mass murder, he still voices striking quips like "There was no way out. […] So don't you ever judge me for doing what Cazador ordered".

But thing is (and I may be biased here again, coming from an Orthodox Christian culture that places a lot of emphasis on internal moral self-judgement), it's not Tav who should be judging him but himself. With seven first-generation spawn Cazador had, and seven thousand spawn in total, each of them dragged hundreds to share the torment they themselves experieced. Okay, the gods refused him aid, the authorities refused him, whatever knightly and religious orders there were in Baldur's Gate failed him - but he always had a way out: just walking out into the sun. After luring in his first dozen victims to be turned into spawn - or even eaten, as he believed, - one has to start wondering if maintaining his own life is worth sacrificing ever more lives of others.

And I'm not saying that Astarion is somehow evil or a moral failure or what have you just because he did not, in fact, walk out into the sun and end himself. People are weak, and they can't be judged for being weak. But what I feel betrays absolute moral bankrupcy is the refusal to reflect on the atrocities he chose to commit to save his own hide, and the attempt to claim immunity just because that choice was forced on him.

[queenvhagar]

"And then they just... included no fire or blood to these characters." but...there’s no shortage of "fire and blood" in the show? not to defend it or anything, but let’s be honest—there’s plenty of "fire and blood" going on. Rhaenyra had the dragonseeds burned by Vermithor, Rhaenys torched a heap of smallfolk during Aegon’s coronation, and Aemond casually set Sharp Point ablaze. The Rook’s Rest battle itself was basically akin to an atomic bomb going off. These acts alone already reflect the destructive, violent nature the Targaryens are known for. And that’s just the beginning—next season’s bound to bring even more war crimes, with Viserys' children at the forefront of the mess (sans Heleana). At the end of the day, all these characters—Rhaenyra, Aegon, Aemond, and Daeron—are neck-deep in violence. Whether or not their reasons are justified doesn’t really matter because they're all guilty. And it is expected because the Dance is a civil war filled with atrocities on both sides. Black and Green do not matter. Every major player gets their hands dirty in some way. The show doesn't shy away from the brutal nature of these characters or their actions. What it does—and what fans often fall into—is minimizing the severity of their deeds by justifying them with backstory or motivation. Fans latch onto these reasons to the point where they start romanticizing aspects of these characters, searching for the "good" in them (gag in disgust), when in reality, they’re all meant to be deeply flawed, even horrible. Let them be bad! That is fine!!! IS FINE!!!! So yeah, the show has many problems regarding narrative arc and artistic decisions, but it isn't shying away from the fire and blood of the Targaryens; it’s woven into their legacy, and we’re seeing that play out. What we really need to do is move past these no-nonsense teams. No more Team Black or Team Green...my god! Just choose Team Evil!!!

My main problem that I'm getting at is the idea that any Targaryen, after their own kin is slain by the enemy and said enemy is actively opposing you, is willing to sue for peace. ESPECIALLY when in Fire and Blood the deaths of Jaehaerys and Lucerys were these ultimate moments where all out fire and blood mentality kicked in for everyone and not only was war inevitable but it was desired. They wanted fire and blood. They wanted vengeance for harms inflicted upon them through any means and at any cost. These are Targaryens at the height of their absolute power. There is nothing they feel they cannot do or will not do. There is no one capable of opposing them, and if anyone tries, they shall face fire and blood.

I understand the argument of there being plenty of actual fire and actual blood being present in the show... as in yes, the dragons still breathe fire and the war is still killing people. But the house words of fire and blood? The mentality of taking all that is owed to you, no backing down, raining annihilation down upon all that oppose you? That's just not present. It's barely even allowed to be hinted at.

Rhaenyra burned Dragonseeds to get dragonriders? Sure, there was technically fire and blood involved and one could argue there were wisps of a true fire and blood Rhaenyra being hinted at for the single scene. But afterward? There's no acknowledgment narratively, nor is there any character growth: Rhaenyra immediately reverts to only wanting to have dragons as a deterrent to war. After she's lost her throne. Her father. Her only daughter. Her son. Her aunt. Their dragons. And despite the fact that the only way she can press her claim when there's already a crowned king is to wage war, and the only reason there is a war is because she is pursuing it in the first place in order to get her throne.

My problem is that there is such a lack of that fire and blood mentality to Rhaenyra and many other Targaryen characters that should be there and was there in the source material. They're not allowed to be real humans let alone real Targaryens. Their fire is extinguished. Their actions illogical. Their emotions suppressed. They do shy away from the brutal actions of these characters by removing their motivations or distancing them from the actual events that they cause. Any blood they spill is not their intention or is done with the goal of preventing a war that they should want at all costs but continuously, unrealistically, try to back away from.

So yes, of course the characters are still involved in terrible things and their actions get people killed. But the drive behind those actions is gone. Instead it's a series of happenstances and misunderstandings and peaceful aspirations that move the plot along. Where is fire and blood? The fiery boldness and anger, the burning desire for vengeance, the willing violence to grab at power and hold it, the inherent self-entitlement and superiority complex that leads them to believe they deserve the throne at all costs, no matter who is in the way and why they have to do to get it? That mentality is gone, as are representations of the true Targaryens of the books. The family that willingly destroyed itself through the embodiment of fire and blood mentality, taking what they believe is owed, seeking total annihilation of the enemy, using living weapons of fire and force submission. These new characters of the show are shadows of what they should have been. That's my problem with the show. The fire and blood mentality that defined this family is gone. In its place are shells of actual characters.

[allwormdiet]

Arc 4: Shell, Concluding Thoughts

Another fucking roller coaster of an arc, let's get to it

Let's see, where to even begin

I like that Taylor's gotten a lot more confident about school. Even if she figures that Emma will inflict some kind of retribution, the fact that she's willing to take that risk for the sake of getting to laugh in her fucking face makes me glad. John Dillinger school of therapy is a fucking go.

I continue to absolutely adore the Undersiders, it's really fun to see them get to interact with each other in a more normal context, walking around the market and shopping and talking about whatever. I could read nothing but Undersiders slice-of-life for like a month straight and never get sick of it

The conversations about triggers and powers and stuff were also interesting tbh, a healthy dose of exposition and fleshing out the way the world works

Alec has grown on me a lot with this arc, between his clear anger at the shit that Taylor's had to put up with and his critical part in the fight against Bakuda

Which. You know what let's go there actually. Bakuda is so fucking terrifying as an antagonist that I kinda hope Lung pulls her back just so she can be less of a goddamn menace. The combination of ruthless forethought and sadistic unpredictability makes for a combination that rapidly outpaced Lung and the Wards as far as "oh shit this is for real," at some point I completely forgot about the Bomberman costume and - oh I wonder if that's why people don't talk about the Bomberman costume that much, the whole thing just accelerates so far past where that can still be talked about without losing focus

It was kinda sweet seeing Brian and Lisa help Taylor out in the aftermath of the fight, getting her home and helping her feel better (and lying to her dad for her). It'd be nice if Taylor decided that this could mean her cape and civilian lives could be more connected but I kind of doubt that's the case, unfortunately

Dog interlude might be best interlude, because Dog, and also Rachel proving that she rules

I kinda wanna get into a long ramble about all of my current character takes and opinions but I kinda want to get further into the story, see if there's a natural point where I can take a break and make that a separate post. If there isn't a natural one maybe I just do it every, I dunno, six arcs. Chunk it into fifths.

...And once again I'm at the end of a post wondering what the fuck is coming next. Presumably duking it out with the ABB, right? I'd like for that to not be the case but I continue to doubt that Taylor will ever have the luxury of being uninvolved in anything ever again. Poor girl.

[styxnbones]

6 song soundtrack for my OC Harper

Stealing this tag from @kavalyera

Rules: If you're tagged, make a new post with links to music and/or lyrics describing the following . . .

1. Event that defines your character's past: Cannibal by Tally Hall

I am the willing victim of a cannibal She rips out my bones just like an animal And right when I'm feeling like my blood is drained She calls it a game But the wound that she leaves in unmistakable

2. How your character sees themselves: Professional Killer by KMFDM

Yours is not to ask why Yours is to do and die

3. How others view them: Scourge of the Tower by Pitch After Dark

Her conduct is condescending She feels her operations are justified Callous vicious malicious and meticulous To keep the masses terrified

4. Their closest relationship (platonic or romantic): Want by Recoil

I wanna know just how much you hate me so I can predict what you'll do I want you to know the wounds are self-inflicted I want a controlling interest I wanna be somewhere beautiful when I die I wanna be your secret hater I wanna stop destroying you, but I cant And I want and I want and I want And I will always be hungry

5. A major fight scene: Lights Out by Mindless Self Indulgence

Punch your lights out, hit the pavement That's what I call entertainment Causin' problems makes you famous All this violence makes a statement

6. End credits song: Salvation and Saving Face by Rosegarden Funeral Party

Oh, what if I never come back from this? Forever part of my eternal darkness Show me what it’s like To live on the other side To live in love and light

tagging anyone who wants to!

[crisiscutie]

People just don't get that redemption isn't for everyone

Yes people can do it but sometimes it's best to say it's irredeemable

Sephiroth has been through so many tragedies to the point,it feels like redemption is one big joke to him,cuz he already reached the point of no return

Personally I feel like the trope of "everything is forgivable" is overused or overlooked way too often,there are things in the world that can't forgive and sometimes punishment is better than forgiveness

In Sephiroth's case, I don't think forgiveness will change anything,rather it's impossible,no one who knows him is willing to forgive him,hence some may say he has no faults at all like Hojo cuz that guy is messed up AF

Take it like this: If a guy who commits an unforgivable crime and someone says he should be forgiven based only on the fact that he was abused or insane or he went through some traumatic shit etc,it would not only feel ridiculous, it's outright selfish

Should Sephiroth be forgiven for the Nibelheim Incident just bcuz it was a crime of passion or he was mentally unstable and should get off free of guilt? No,cuz he did something terrible to others and that should be accepted

I've seen too many cases of normalisation or glorification or defence of characters' faults and apparently "you're a bitch for pointing out others' faults" these days and "it's not nice to have criticisms"

I saw some deep toxic shit about normalised toxicity in fiction lately

I mean I love Seph,but god I'm heavily aware he's evil as hell

-🌹

Yup. Sephiroth's path is set in his mind. For what reason would he deviate from his path? He decided to continue the cycle of pain. And Cloud could've continued that cycle after him if it wasn't for Tifa.

I want to state this: I'm against Sephiroth being redeemed. One reason is that no character ever deserves redemption. Redemption is a complex, grueling process that involves self-reflection, remorse, and a genuine desire to change. It requires a willingness to confront your actions and the consequences you inflicted upon others. Sephiroth, so far, has done none of this. He felt justified in his actions. And the few times when he does acknowledge what he has done? He rubs it in Cloud's face, for goodness' sake. He did this in Advent Children, 7R and even the original FF7, especially during that one iconic scene that shall not be named. Sephiroth has displayed constant cruelty to Cloud, his party and the planet. What on Gaia justifies him deserving redemption? Because of his awful and traumatic past?

Let me say this: the events leading up to and following Sephiroth's birth and childhood were undeniably tragic, and he cannot be blamed for them in any way. However, as an adult with the ability to choose his own path, he made the decision to inflict harm upon others, especially those who ZERO involvement in his suffering.

And like I said before, introducing a potential redemption arc for Sephiroth would actually undermine Cloud's own arc and diminish its impact. Sephiroth serves as a warning to Cloud. He is his dark mirror and representing of what a "hero" could become.

I would also like to mention Aerith, who, like Cloud, serves as another mirror to Sephiroth and had a deeply traumatic past. However, instead of succumbing to darkness like Sephiroth, she remained kind and hopeful. Sephiroth's redemption may also conflict with her story and role as well.

To sum it up, redemption would require Sephiroth to question his beliefs and recognize the pain and suffering he has caused. He's not going to do that. He believes himself to be in the right, and the pain he caused to be "justice" in his mind.

And as you mentioned, it's clear that forgiveness is out of the question for him now. Cloud and Tifa, in particular, hold a deep hatred towards him and are determined to put an end to him. It sucks how Tifa's grudge with Sephiroth has been largely overlooked, both by the fandom and CANON (seriously, what were the writers thinking...). Let's not forget the sheer terror poor Tifa had in 7R when she saw Sephiroth in front of Jenova's pod.

Both she and Cloud had been scarred (literally and figuratively) by this man for the rest of their LIVES. They deserve every blow they can get on Sephiroth...

Anyways, rant over. Please stop trying to make Sephiroth "work". He was a sweet baby that became an evil bastard. Let's appreciate the good and bad of the Crisis Cutie!

(Opinion piece if it isn't obvious)

[meteorstricken]

I've seen it argued that Ultima lacks empathy, and that this is what hinders him from grasping how humanity connects and cares for one another, but I think the nature of this beast is a bit more sinister than that.

Some fairly significant spoilers ahead...

My conclusion is that Ultima is in reality better understood as a dark empath--that is, one who can understand feelings and what motivates people extremely well, but does not share in the experience. Instead, the dark empath will typically use their razor-sharp cognition of others' feelings to manipulate them.

Here's a reference.

This is especially evident in scenes where Ultima appears to the characters as dead loved ones whose memory tends to evoke some intense guilt, longing, grief, and passion. The scene where Clive faces "himself" and falls to his knees before the flame-engulfed figure of Joshua as he last had known him up to that point, filled to brimming with sorrow, is one example. The notorious scene with Barnabas where Ultima role-plays as Benedikta, Hugo, and Barnabas' mother is another.

Ultima's colorful language about humans bolstering one another's usually weak wills by weaving together their consciousness reveals that he understands how a good support system works, and he further spells out the exact nature of those bonds--love, trust--in the aforementioned scene with Barnabas.

(Barnabas himself seems to rely on Ultima as a surrogate social support system, which...sure is a choice, and not one I'm entirely certain he can be wholly blamed for, as the latter end of the game is awash in context clues that he was more or less groomed to that end.)

And thus, Ultima's goal in attempting to cut the threads of consciousness (bonds) supporting Clive is to produce such a profoundly overwhelming state of grief in him that he can't recover from or cope with it, and sees no more reason to keep trying. With his own personal concept of meaning so thoroughly severed--ailing under the sense that even as he breathes, his life is truly over--Clive would theoretically become much more willing to be the 'Mythos' vessel that Ultima wants him to be.

And THAT is...too much...to scheme without any kind of empathy, and because it's too much, it really just underlines the severe extent of the ice-cold contempt Ultima has for humanity. He understands them, but he has always had but one use for making them, and resents the living piss out of them for evolving in a way that throws a wrench into his plans while he was hibernating.

He understands them, but is too entrenched in his own fear, hypocrisy, megalomania, and denial for that to produce any kind of *emotional* empathy--it's 100% cognitive.

As an aside, I have to argue with Clive's late-game insistence that Ultima's never suffered. The combination of fear, control freakishness, and self-isolation Ultima is revealed to have and practice don't typically tend to arise uninspired. It's quite possibly self-inflicted--being a little "g" god who's erroneously convinced himself he's the big "G" and can therefore tell reality how to work will do that--but I do believe it's more likely than not that Ultima has, in their milennia-long life, known a great deal of suffering. All that intricate, surgical understanding of how to produce more angst and suffering from individual to individual has to come from somewhere, and "he created them" doesn't quite make the cut because humanity evolved and awoke absent his guidance.

[iristial]

Been thinking about how I usually don't have the best first impression of grumpy, aggressive and intense (occasionally stoic) characters - a perception which can last throughout the entire story - and the three to four ways these characters can be endeared to me (though not always):

They get made fun of. It balances out their seriousness and frowny faces, lets me know they aren't taken seriously all the time, shows they're not immune to or above the sillier/nice/mundane things in life. Or maybe they're silly themselves! Though it should be done in a way that doesn't feel jarring to their preexisting characterization or makes me want to cringe. Personally, I don't like being intense all the time; it makes me stressed, anxious and tired. Even bored sometimes. Some examples for me are Geats Michinaga, Zero One Fuwa, probably several others

They're actually very kind. Have a nicer side that counters and even cancels out their less ideal qualities, which can be a byproduct of the stress and frustration their job inflicts which they take very seriously (i.e. LuPato Keiichiro) or a defense mechanism (i.e. Den-O Yuuto). Then I can see their grumpiness and pessimism is part of who they are but it isn't everything to their character. People have flaws and different types of dispositions, which have their own merits

They undergo character development that makes them a better person. They make the effort to change. Maybe they're still grumpy at the end of it, but I'll be okay with it

Circumstances made them what they are. It doesn't truly justify their worse, less-than-moral actions (should they be the type who's also villainous, antagonistic and/or willing to stoop down into the dirt to get stuff done) but I'm more willing to feel sympathetic and be understanding towards them. In this case, an opportunity for change should be given to them and somewhere along the line, the character takes it

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

I saw your tags on a post about becoming the mc in one of your novels. Gothic, where the character is more monster than damsel and i am 👀

Would you be willing to talk about it? The story, the character, anything?

(for those of you who did not see my tags on the post anon is referencing, the post prompt was basically 'you are now the main character of your most recent WIP' and my tags were: #technically I think this would put me as the MC of my novel#in a gothic mansion that houses a monstrous lord said to steal people’s souls#in a village the inhabitants view as a cage#after faking my death to escape an abusive arranged marriage#discovering that I am more monster than damsel)

so i talked about it briefly when i ran this poll a while ago asking which one of these two novels you'd all like to see first. it is the one that won, the gothic found family: Of Beasts and Wretched Things (working title). feel free to click through to the poll if you want to see what the results were, what the other option was, and what people's initial reactions were!

Of Beasts and Wretched Things is an inverted 'Beauty and the Beast' coming of age story that wrestles with the monstrosities of girlhood and the inherent horror of self-creation.

When the Lord of Crosswell Estate plans to wed his niece to a brutish lord to save his wealth, she runs away and stumbles upon Illthern, a forgotten trading village under the control of the monstrous Theodoric Gaut, whom she deceives in order to gain his protection from her wrathful uncle; but when she finds herself face to face with Lord Gaut, who is not what the stories would have her believe, she must wrestle with the monstrosity of her own making before he discovers that his supposed long-lost relative is not what she claims to be.

(More under the cut bc wow I...got a bit carried away.)

working on this project has helped me work through some of the trauma i have around my own relationship to femininity and womanhood. the MC struggles with the legacy of abuse inflicted by her blood relatives and what it means to be the person they tried to make her into. the inherent fear of things labeled 'monster' and the consequential fear of being monstrous is a predominant theme, as well as questions of how many of the monsters are things we make ourselves.

what really drew me to the gothic genre was the emotional weight i wanted to give these characters and this world; so often in gothic works it is the characters' own emotional turmoil that drives the plot and shapes the setting, you are the ghost haunting the house even though you still draw breath, etc. even in this real world, there are these weights of what society things a woman should be, the pressures of girlhood especially during adolescence, and these weird half-mourning periods of killing the person you used to be. i think because i wanted these characters to be steeped in the emotions they have about their situations in life and themselves, i found myself drawn to gothic conventions just because it fit so well with what i wanted to explore

with regards to the characters themselves, and particularly the MC, i really wanted them to feel like they were driving the story. the MC has the brilliant and terrible certainty that I know at least I had when I was a teenager. Theodoric is very similar to most characters you'd expect to see in a gothic setting: ominous, more than a bit sinister or mysterious, yet I wanted it to feel like he was always hiding a bleeding heart just under his coat. did i mean to make him autistic? no, but when I was proofreading i was like whoa yeah this man has the spicy brain. i'm a sucker for monstrous things that treat others with tenderness first, what can i say. i don't want to talk too much about any other characters just yet, I don't want to spoil anything :)

WIP-wise, I'm in the midst of getting the manuscript ready to submit to agencies and publishing houses. it's funny, as i'm doing the research to see what that entails, the other story seems to be way easier to market. who knows, maybe i'll self publish OB&WT the way I did Tales from Thicketdown Forest and then go the traditional route for the other one. we'll find out, i guess.

i did sort of know this was going to get long but jfc i went way harder with my prose here than i thought i was going to. uh, hope this answers your question????

Tl:dr; gothic found family h/c, heavy on the comfort, with tender monsters and monstrous girls :)

[zukkacore]

I want the director’s cut of. Honestly the entirety of if you want divinity. I’ll take whatever you’re willing to talk about. I need to just stare out a window for awhile. I feel like crying. Wow. Amazing story stunning stunning stunning.

HELLO FRIEND SCREAMS thank you so much you know how meaningful it is that people like. Like my writing and engage with it and you've been so sosososo incredibly sweet. Sorry yours took the longest, I was trying to think of something to say bc apparently there's a word limit on these things. Boo. I would totally do a total annotated doc otherwise bc im cringe but i went over like a LOT of the references stuff in Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 which honestly. Might be a lot of the process.

Imma see if I have any other notes off the top of my head:

THE POSTER: ok, so. The WEAKNESS IS PAIN LEAVING THE BODY poster. Obviously that's a bit of an ironic joke. That wasn't even really supposed to be there. I'm realizing i kept in the draft the fact that Jace makes the picture frames on Porter's desk rattle. And actually, during the implied Cassandra Divine Intervention scene where the poster falls, was originally supposed to be one of the pictures on the desk. I... couldn't justify it. I was like. idk whats weird n whats not to have as a framed picture on your desk if you're a teacher.

I'm like. Genuinely I think one of my biggest flaws as a writer is sensory detail, description, like maintaining characters geography w/in a space. King of white wall syndrome. At the bare minimum, I do think there's this kinda funny old vs. new feeling regarding Jace's belongings, his home, etc. Or like. I guess not kitsch but like something mass market vs. very old and traditional. Like the couch in my head like something small, ugly and modern, like very minimalist and kinda uncomfortable, and something a lot of people would own. But there's also the grandfather clock in the corner—to me that's also something that was passed down like the brooch. The brooch, moon n stars, obviously n heirloom—he's has like old roots in fallinel, his family is of Galicaean faith. But also The brooch is described in the same scene as the mug Porter keeps, and it's the most generic millenial like mass market slogan thing you've ever seen. There's this like. Presence of his family's influence even if he doesn't speak to them. But also a life that's. Kinda on autopilot.

I.... i always feel like I'm patting myself on the back abt this. I do really like the Detect magic + Teleport meld. I think it was clever. I'm telling myself that's ok to say. Mainly b/c it was a good solution to two problems. And a little bit b/c I think it's romantic to rip through space and time for someone. Again, I keep joking that he loved Porter to the point of invention (something i only feel self congratulatory about bc he did it in canon first).

Anyway. I was struggling SO HARD on what to do about these flashback scenes and i've said this before but like they were so close to being on the cutting room floor. I just felt like i couldn't justify them in something that was meant to be kinda... fun? Haha. "fun" IYWD. As if. The Detect thoughts i think helped with what to do about inserting those flashbacks, which i think helped resolve my problem of them feeling pointless b/c its like. It's not for our benefit, it's literally the memories weighing on Porter at like all times. They hang over everything.

The Teleport part was bc i was like. Ok. This is the biting maiming killing dropping during sex couple. If there's a question of "you can do anything you want to me", there HAS to be an escalation of stakes. But also this doesn't feel like a story that necessitates like. A lot of violence in their kinkplay I guess? When there's so much else going on, there's so much like about mourning and the violence already inflicted on Jace twofold that's actually a source of guilt for his horrible evil loser boyfriend porter. I already went through a LOT of contrivance just to get them into Porter's office (i think the fucking in porter's office jokes are fun, sue me), but I also was like. Ok. I think I need to go bigger by going smaller. If he changes the spell to rip through time, there's this like—doubling that makes it so on some level they're basically recreating their first time. Which i think makes the kinda silly vanilla (with little bit of mind reading lol) mundanity of that last part hopefully work

Fun Fact: the "I actually kinda miss you, aint that peculiar" "I'm right here" scene is the first one I wrote. It was basically the basis for everything. As it existed then, it was wayyyyy different tho. The tone was actually a lot more hostile. The patching up injuries thing actually came in way later and i was super embarrassed bc i was like that's so cliche but now i like it b/c i think there's such a Ratgrinders haunt the narrative thing about it. A Jace Cares and that's the thesis of Porter's grief thing about it.

The "there it is, the line" "you're so weird" into he never wants porter to stop saying mystifying things to him. Like. Completely changed the trajectory of what was going on almost by accident. Like. It literally wasn't until that moment that i was like. Oh. Oh. He wants porter to stay. B/c like

I see so much of the 1st half of the story as Jace like. Using Porter's want for him as a way to satisfy his own wants and needs. He wants pleasure after denying himself. But he also needs to live. I keep saying he's using sex as a tool b/c i really think he is—he wants to be so good porter can never live without him. And on level one, that's about making sure he's indispensible. Making sure he stays alive. But the second thing thats buried under there is more of a want—for Porter to stay with him. And that changed it from Jace actually fighting to have the upper hand and in some ways even getting Porter on the back foot to it being like. Actual desperation.

How many Jaces are in this story? Good question. Pre and post shatterstar for sure, but also we only see Pre in flashbacks so they're more like Porter's perception of pre. The clones are implied but do not make an appearance. And obviously after the first 5, the other jaces w/in 8 Jace thesis are more concepts in people's heads (and also one of them is 25). The Jace of Porter's memory is definitely there. The Jace Porter thought he would get after the shatterstar also haunts the scene. too. It's jaces all the way down.

Idk if it makes sense my logic behind this but. There's Porter complimenting Jace when he's really raw and vulnerable and messy and its like. Jace's response is that it's unfair. And b/c there's so much talk abt justice and unfair in FHJY i was like. Can. there be an instance in which something is unfair in a good way? Like. In that you're the one being treated unfairly at the expense of everyone else. Like. almost like. Sometimes you can be unfair in that you're easier on your friend than you might be on someone else. That's not fair, but like. That's human. Like if something is unfair you might be getting an advantage on something you didn't earn. But you don't have to earn love, but the fact that Jace didn't have to work for it, he feels like he's getting something too easily. It's unfair. In a good way.

I've said this before but I do think Porter is able to come to some sort of synthesis about Jace. And that he was maybe able to even conceive of the totality of him b/c of how the flashbacks are laid out. Like. in the first one he's unpalatable and angry and a disappointment to the memory of Jace that Porter imagined. In the second one he's sort of perfect, the scene too short and precious and romanticized to be muddied by real flaws in his mundanity and simplicity. And in the last one, Jace is mundane, flawed, overworked, overly familiar with his students, willing to play favorites, but also empathetic, good at making connections, ultimately well meaning and trying his best. Someone real, that's Porter's favorite. It's up to interpretation i think. esp bc like.

Counterpoint: I think you could also read that. Porter seems to love this Jace more the way a god loves their creation than the way a man loves another man. Like. yeah they're suckin n fuckin but also Porter being in to the fact that jace is "so trusting" is very. Helio always has a plan and i let him take the wheel, no? He's moved by Jace's devotion. Jace will take that tho. He'll take it all.

Final point: if brennan says that anything his PCs do can become fair game for him, then same for me. If Adaine n Aelwyn can use dimension door to go to her parents house / aelwyn's apartment despite the distance, that's fair game for me to misuse it < 3. (i just think if i'd allowed for the teleport it would've made way more sense to go to someone's house. And llike. that's no fun at all

I might rb with more thoughts later to be a menace. Thank you!

[bts-story]

LOVE IS CHAOS

Previous chapters

Chapter 10 - Hatter

The Hatter. 

He was a strange character. Eccentric, arrogant, extreme. To begin with, the way he never took off his sunglasses, like an undercover movie star, made him absolutely ridiculous in your eyes. He must have thought he was the "Sun King" because the way he kept talking with big gestures and threatening words was a clear indication of how he was used to having a horde of minions at his command.

He may have been someone important in the real world before, but this was the Borderland. And in the Borderland, there were no labels, no class pyramids. Money was useless, fame and beauty were worthless. 

It had been precisely twelve days since the eight of clubs, and with Niragi, you spent your days mostly trying to find food. This was no small task, and hunting was definitely not your forte. Still, persistence paid off, and eventually you found a way to trap those famous rabbits that wandered the city at random. 

After a few days, a big discussion had once again taken place between you two. You had determined that the only way to learn more about this crazy country was to play games. There was always a sharp-tongued player to bring you new information, while outside of the threat of an arena, no one was willing to reveal anything. 

One evening, while walking near the harbor, you came face to face with a group of players. Three women and a man who had literally liquefied in front of you. They were so frightened of running into other gamers that they took off running, abandoning their camp as fast as they could. Good for you, you got to taste their dinner and drink their water. It wasn't very nice of you, but it was their loss. They didn't seem to want to come back so soon anyway. 

Another time, it was two men you passed near Koto's movie theater, and their menacing looks and the sight of their weapons held at their fingertips made you turn back. There was no point in confronting them when they didn't look at all convenient. 

So, the only way you could get answers was to wait at the exit of a game arena and question the surviving players. You still had days left on your visa and there was no point in going into a game unnecessarily. 

At the exit of a two of diamonds, you had stopped a woman in her thirties who was clutching her bloody left hand, which was missing a finger. "Hey, you," Niragi had called in front of the Tokyo Museum of Contemporary Art, "tell me what you know about this country." 

The woman looked at him incredulously as she caught her breath. Other surviving players passed behind, exclaiming and celebrating their victory. The woman leaned against the wall outside the museum, ready to hurl a well-placed insult. But you approached her gently before she could say anything, shooting an exasperated look at Niragi. "My name is [Y/N], I'm a doctor," you explained gently, hoping that this would help her relax. "I can probably fix your hand, if you let me look."

Suspicious, the woman looked at you from head to toe, and after a few seconds, when she considered that you did not represent any danger for her, she nodded. You had kept your backpack, the one where you had made a small stock of medicines and bandages that you now always kept with you. 

The lady's hand was shaking and while you were looking in the bottom of your bag for some sanitizer and bandages, Niragi was standing at a distance, staring at you. It was better if he left you to it, he had a lot of qualities under his nasty shell but social and sociable were clearly not his forte.

"That's a dirty wound," you commented to get her attention on you so that she would forget about the way Niragi was looking at her with unimpressed eyes. "What was the game?" 

"The hangman," she asserted breathlessly, already apprehensive of the pain you were about to inflict on her. "And you had to provide the hanged man with a body part of yours for every wrong answer." 

Oh, that was nasty. Really nasty. It must have been a mess. Curious that it was only a twofer after all. She didn't seem to want to say anything more and you understood her. Reliving the horror when you had just escaped it seemed like a whole new ordeal in itself. 

"Careful, it's gonna sting," you warned before pouring the disinfectant over the bloody hole between her thumb and middle finger. The woman hissed in pain, gripping her wrist tightly. A nasty insult flew through the air and after that, you prepared the sewing thread as well as the needle you had found in a sewing kit from one of the apartments you had been squatting in. 

"Why are you helping me?" She asked to keep her mind occupied and not think about the pain that would ensue when you'd pierce her skin with that needle. 

Niragi was looking at you intensely and you didn't need to meet his eyes to know what he was thinking. He was probably wondering why you were so intent on wasting your resources and medicine on a stranger, and you could have gotten information out of him otherwise. "I think the real world is already way too shitty for us not to help each other in this one, don't you think?"

It was a logical progression though. Helping her and expecting something in return. Information. It was a very respectable exchange according to you.

"My name is Seolhyun and I'm Korean. I've been here for thirty-two days, I've played six games, and I still don't know who the fuck is that put us here. I have no idea how we got here, no idea why we got here. All I know is that we have to play games to survive." She recited these words breathlessly as you finally broke through her skin. In the end, it didn't seem to hurt as much as she thought it would, as she barely moved at the pain. 

Niragi sighed behind you. It was true that it was disappointing to know that this woman would not bring you more information and that the gaping hole of mystery of this world remained unanswerable. " Fucking hell..." he swore as he threw his head back, defeated at the words. 

It was true that it was quite disappointing to know that this woman couldn't give you any more answers. It was as if, finally, it was absolutely impossible for anyone to unravel the secrets of this world, and that you were all destined, whoever you were, to play these games without question. 

"You don't know... if there's any way out of here?" you asked carefully, as you finished stitching up the lady. You still had to do a bandage as you cut the thread, and she watched you do it carefully. 

"You look like a good person to me," she began softly, still ignoring the way Niragi sneered at her words, "so I'll tell you something. There's someone here who thinks he's figured out the mystery of this world. But... he's not really a good person. He is a dangerous man who calls himself The Hatter. He thinks that if we put all the cards together, we can get out of here." 

That was a good explanation. You had come up with the same one. It was a logical enough interpretation to come up with at the moment. And it seemed like a long, long time. You had only one card, and the second card, the eight of clubs, had been stolen from you callously by Chishiya and An. How do you get fifty-two cards together when everyone else is chasing them too? 

"Has anyone ever succeeded? To get out I mean..." you asked as you placed the bandages on her hand, which soaked up blood directly, draping the cotton in a dark red. 

"Not that I know of, it's just a myth after all." She affirmed and clasped her hand against her chest again as soon as you were done with her. She met Niragi's eyes, who this time, was waiting for her next words with impatience. His face was closed, eyebrows furrowed as he stood motionless in front of her, arms crossed against his chest. "You could look him up and ask him yourself, he's hiding out in a hotel he's renamed The Beach. But... Here's my advice for helping me... If I were you, I'd do anything to avoid him. Him and his minions."

"What makes him so dangerous, then?" Niragi asked firmly, unimpressed by her warnings. 

She looked at him intensely, and after a few seconds, she continued, "He is looking for players to collect the cards for him, under threat of execution if they do not submit to his orders." She sighed and you exchanged a look with Niragi, "He is creating a dictatorship in that Beach of his, and the only solution to not dying because of him is to run away from him at all costs." 

"And how do you know that, anyway?" Niragi accused suddenly.

"Those are the rumors... If you want to get out of here quickly, you should gather those cards on your own," she muttered as she finally stood up. She stretched her injured arm and patted her upper thighs to dust them off. With a smile, she began to walk a few steps toward the exit but stopped short at Niragi. She stared at him silently, judgment clear in her eyes. She turned back to you, and spoke again, "Thanks for your help. And beware of players with numbered bracelets around their wrists. They are the Hatter's minions." 

The woman left and Niragi's incredulous look mirrored yours. If it was possible, she hadn't so much brought answers as even more questions. It was quite strange, and despite her warnings, the curiosity that hovered around Hatter would perhaps drive you to seek him out and find the answers for yourself. 

Which leads us, ultimately, to this very moment. It was actually just a coincidence, but the woman's warnings had been of great help to you. 

He was shirtless, wearing shorts and a long red and black Japanese vest. He had medium-length hair that fell over his shoulders and sunglasses on his nose despite the dark evening and the stars shining high in the sky. 

It took only an hour and a few minutes after meeting this young woman, to run into the man who called himself The Hatter. It was not in your plans to run into him, let alone fall into his net. Even if the warnings of the player had not worried you more than that (you had bet on the small possibilities of running into him in the vastness of Tokyo to escape him), it was much more prudent to be wary of every word he said. 

"Look, Aguni, two little lost sheep," he laughed with a cold chuckle as he got out of the car, slamming the door violently. 

You really had to go over all those mathematical calculations, because running into someone who was warning you about somebody else, and running into that somebody very precisely an hour later, was a coincidence you found suspicious. And the headlights of the car speeding toward you as you walked down to the harbor had caught you off guard. Amazed to see a car running, the metal carcass had stopped at your level before you could hide from it. 

Strangely enough, even before the two men showed up, you had a crazy hunch about the identity of these two thugs. Or at least one of them. He had this arrogance painted on his face that couldn't fool you. Niragi had stepped in front of you, protecting you from any threat that came your way. 

The man named Aguni was tall and strong, wearing a tank top that showed off his muscles. He had a shaved head, a mustache and a goatee that vaguely reminded you of the military stereotype. Anyway, his face was closed, his jaw tense and his arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the hood of the car he hadn't turned off after he left the wheel. 

He said nothing and the other shirtless man walked around the car to greet you with two open arms and a smile on his face. "I don't believe we've met," he'd said and you'd taken a step back, more than a little wary at the sight of these strangers. It wasn't trivial to run into other players in the city, but the intentions of some were so questionable that it was best to stay in your lane and avoid unnecessary trouble. 

"Who the fuck are you, and what do you want?" Niragi had threatened in a low, authoritative voice, offering his best dark look he had in stock. 

There was a gun around the tank top man's belt and a bracelet around his wrist, and the Hatter stepped forward a little more, as if to block your eyes as they analyzed his friend's figure. "My name is Takeru Danma, but you can call me Hatter." 

Niragi chuckled at the name. A small chuckle that slowly evolved into a mocking laugh and you watched him from the corner of your eye, somehow worried that he might offend the man in front of you. "You're the Hatter?" He chuckled some more before turning his head to meet your gaze. He had that little mischievous look in his eyes that you found absolutely no place for in this situation. "I was expecting some kind of big shot and a freak hat on his head."

"You know me?" the man asked curiously, almost surprised. 

"You have a reputation," you informed before Niragi could, as if expecting him to say something tangential again.

This time it was the Hatter who smiled, and behind him the stone man did not move, did not smile, did not speak. "A good reputation, I hope," he tried to joke as if to lighten the mood. But it was futile. The woman's warnings remained in a corner of your head, far too prepared by the soft words or threats he might throw at you to rally you to his cause. 

"Not really," Niragi chuckled as if it gave him pleasure to contradict the shirtless man, as if depriving him of such an illusion somehow gave him personal satisfaction.

"I take it you've heard of my Beach, then?" 

"Your dictatorship?" Niragi asked innocently, as if the weight of his words didn't have the power to put you in danger. "Yeah, we heard of it." 

The Hatter's smile faded for only a second, insisting with his deep black eyes on both of your figures to determine what attitude to approach after a confession like that, and finally, he clapped his hands and exclaimed again, "Aguni!" He turned around and the man behind him looked at him with a bored expression, finally dropping his insistent gaze from your face. "Remind me why the Beach was created." 

Taking a breath, Aguni recited in a detached tone, as if every word he spoke pissed him off, "To gather as many players as possible and help each other gather the cards so we can all get the hell out of here."

"There, that's it," the Hatter nodded as if he wasn't sure why he had created his... company, or whatever it was. He walked a few steps to the right, then back, walked left, and back again. He was thinking, as if he was finally calculating his every word. Was he trying to win you over?

"Rumors say you get people to play games to collect cards for you," you pointed dangerously, cutting him off in his reflection. 

He stopped short and stared at you for a few seconds before licking his bottom lip. Then he scratched the back of his head, exchanged a look with Aguni, and finally said, "You don't strike me as people who believe rumors." 

Mmh. He was answering your accusation with another accusation, and that was smart, from your point of view. It didn't create affirmation or negation.

"I have the vague impression that you've been here long enough to know that the players of this world have to play to supply our visas, am I right?" He was right, indeed. But that didn't really mean much. It was as easy to steal other people's cards as it was to force them to play deadly games under threat of irreversible repercussions. 

The master of this game was no match for the Hatter, who made his own rules in this crazy world.

"I have something to offer you," he finally began again, and Aguni straightened up behind him, offering a menacing look as a sign of his authority. "You join my Beach, play the games of this world, and bring back the cards you win..." 

He knew he had piqued your interest, he knew you were waiting for the next part, to know what he was going to offer you in return. He knew he was onto something and that his proposal was enticing enough to make anyone flinch. It was only the beginning of his experiment, only the beginning of his creation, but he had faith in his values and expectations. He believed in it, and with that alone, the Hatter knew he could rally anyone to his cause. 

"...and in turn, I offer you food, shelter, electricity, and most importantly, working showers. Hot ones, I might add." That last word could have been enough to make you groan on the spot. Your skin instantly tingled at the thought of a hot shower. It had been so long since you'd had one that you'd forgotten how it felt. 

You longed for something carefully prepared, something warm and good that had nothing to do with canned food or rabbits caught on the run. 

It was a tempting proposition. It was. 

"How can you have electricity in that Beach of yours, when the whole city is  out?" Niragi spat accusingly, and he was right to be suspicious. It was important not to forget the woman's warnings earlier. 

"There's a power generator," he explained simply. It was still suspicious to you, why would this world go to such lengths to strip you of electricity, if it was to leave generators lying around the city? 

The Hatter watched you intently, as if he had played his own cards and was waiting for your next move. He offered a smile as Niragi turned a second time to meet your gaze. 

You had never mastered the skill of reading each other's minds, but the years spent together were a great help in deciphering what was hidden in each other's eyes. 

Niragi's eyes were round, eyebrows raised as if to say, ‘What do you think?’

You only had to tilt your head slightly to the side and bite your lower lip, the intense look in your eyes to retort something that would have looked like: 'He can't be trusted!'. 

Niragi smiled. He had something on his mind. His decision was made. 

"And tell me, Hatter, in your beautiful Beach dictatorship there -" 

"It's not a dictatorship." Hatter cut Niragi off, who glared at him. 

Niragi rocked back and forth on his other foot, brushing away a lock of hair that fell in front of his eyes. He scoffed at the boldness that the other man showed him, fearlessly cutting him off. It was strange for him, because this person, the Hatter, seemed as unimpressed by him as by his threatening airs. 

Everywhere he went, Niragi was used to seeing glances down, footsteps rushing by, and sometimes even seeing figures change sidewalks at the sight of him. He had this bad boy aura about him, like someone so unfriendly that it was better to avoid him at all costs. Without even opening his mouth to express in a deep and authoritative voice two or three insults often well placed, he had the attitude of a man with whom one did not want to have problems.

But the Hatter, or maybe it was only because of the bodyguard behind him who was looking at Niragi with a contemptuous look, did not seem to be afraid in the least. On the contrary, it finally seemed to suit him. As if you were exactly what he was missing. 

"Forcing people to do what you want, I call that a dictatorship." You commented in a firm tone and the Hatter turned his attention back to you. 

"Ooh, that one bites!" He exclaimed with a big smile as he clapped his hands excitedly. He took a step towards you, but was stopped short by an arm that blocked his path, Niragi's figure more imposing than his own. 

Their faces a few centimeters apart, Niragi muttered something under his breath that was too imperceptible for you to hear. Behind them, Aguni straightened up and pulled the Hatter towards him, his gaze as black as the sky as he threatened Niragi with his imposing gaze. 

"Aguni, my friend, remind me of the rules of the Beach, please," the Hatter resumed and the summoned man's shoulders relaxed once he felt that Niragi was not a threat. 

"Rule number one, you must always wear a bathing suit," Aguni recited in a still detached, completely bored tone. Every word that came out of his mouth seemed to hurt him to the core of his being. 

Niragi sneered and you raised your eyebrows. "You're kidding." 

"This rule is only imposed on non-executive players, it's to... avoid carrying illegal weapons, I'd say," the Hatter explained and you wondered what the reason for this rule could have been. Had someone wanted to rebel, carry a gun and point it at him? 

"Rule number two," Aguni continued, ignoring the little exchange that had just occurred, "You are free to live your life exactly as you wish." 

"There, that... that's a good rule," the Hatter commented, taking his little steps left and right again. "That doesn't sound like a dictatorship, does it?" 

Aguni was still staring at the two of you, as if he was only waiting for one thing, and that was to get the hell out of here. A simple "No," came out of his mouth before he finally uncrossed his arms to shove his hands into the pockets of his shorts. 

"Who are the execs?" You asked curiously, and you needed a lot more before you knew if you wanted to join his cause or not. You had to take the opportunity to get away scot-free if it came up, or accept such an enticing opportunity if it did. 

"They're players like you and me, who have proven their loyalty and brought high-level cards back to the Beach," he explained simply, and that damn smile that stuck to his face was starting to irritate you. 

You could see past his fake politeness, past the appearances and this show he was putting on. 

"Do you have any cards, by the way?" Hatter asked curiously, alternating his gaze between Niragi and you.

The trust was so far out of reach that you couldn't conceive of giving him the only card you had in your possession. After all, taking on a card hunter wasn't in your plans at all. 

"What about you?" You retorted quickly, as if in the end, it was he who had to prove to you that he was worthy of this world. As if, it wasn't you who had to prove yourself, but it was him and his misplaced ideology that had to show that you could believe in him and what he said. 

Hatter chuckled as his eyes locked on yours, and calling over his shoulder, he grumbled happily, "You hear that, Aguni? The lady asks if we have any cards!" 

He chuckled at his own words, but the man behind him only bulged his chest, not a shadow of a smile on his face. You wondered then if this man had known joy in his life, even for a single second. 

"Of course we have," the Hatter continued after a minute, "we're starting to have a nice little collection, by the way." 

Once again, Niragi turned to capture your gaze and this time, it was you who spoke up. "Very well. We have a question though, before we join your amazing sect," The Hatter winced at the word but said nothing. "Your bracelets, there, what are they for?" 

You pointed to the bracelet around his wrist that brilliantly asserted the number one, under the light of the moon. Aguni, behind him, was wearing the number two. 

The Hatter exchanged a look with him, and scratching the back of his head again, he cleared his throat before explaining, "This is the hierarchy of the Beach. I wholeheartedly believe that if we put all the cards together, we can escape this world all together and return to our own. If only one person is allowed to go though... then the bracelets determine the order of departure. I created the Beach, so I am number one, it goes without saying." 

"And if we joined you, what number would we be?" You asked and Niragi listened intently, still glaring. 

The Hatter looked uncomfortable now, as if he had prepared his speech but not the questions he might have been asked. He hesitated for a moment, before answering that "It will depend on what you bring to the Beach. Either you're one of the reckless players who are obsessed with playing as many games as possible to bring back those cards, or you're one of the people who can help us outside the games. Mechanics, cooks, doctors, that sort of thing..." 

It took a lot of effort not to meet Niragi's gaze again and perhaps silently admit that one of you would be of great help to their group. You had to keep your identity a secret until you knew more about The Beach and the other people in it. 

But for the moment, with your status as a doctor, it was almost sure that it would bring you an undeniable importance there. Niragi, on the other hand, would be willing to play games to bring himself the importance he deserved. 

"You wouldn't be a doctor, by any chance? It would seem that there is not one in this world..." You found the Hatter to be a man of many words. He had his mouth running on its own schedule, not caring how briskly he strung together each word he spoke. As if the whole alphabet was not concrete enough to form the words he wanted to transcribe orally. 

He was a strange character. Yes. Arrogant, eccentric. It all blended awfully well with this gloomy world that reeked of danger and menace.

You largely ignored the Hatter's words, and as Aguni moved away from the vehicle to make room, you walked to the door. Opening the back of the battered blue BMW, you gave an inviting look to Niragi, who hurriedly sat down in the back of the car beside you. The Hatter clapped his hands, excited at the idea of having rallied two new recruits to his cause. 

"That's wonderful, Aguni, I'm sure the four of us will get along just fine!" And Aguni rolled his eyes as he resumed his seat behind the wheel. Sitting on the passenger side, the Hatter put his feet up on the dashboard, as carefree as he was indifferent. 

The engine purred loudly and Aguni accelerated towards his destination, the Beach. 

You were curious to see what it looked like, and who you would have to deal with, once there. You had to brave your courage and even with all the boldness in the world, you still had to be wary. For now, a new adventure was about to begin, and discreetly, Niragi's fingers slipped between yours to press a reassuring pressure. 

When you looked at him, his head was turned, eyes peering through the open window as the wind blew through his hair. He gave a second squeeze around your hand and as quickly as it had come, he withdrew his fingers and ruffled his hair as it fell into his neck. He pulled his bun tighter, and it was so hard to ignore the way his neck shone in the moonlight. Like he was inviting you to plant one, two, three, a thousand kisses there. 

But the Hatter's insistent gaze in the rearview mirror burned your skin, and looking away - finally - through your own window, you tried to carefully memorize the address of that Beach.   

The Seaside Paradise Hotel was large enough to accommodate two hundred people. It was an old luxury hotel, with a pool and tennis court, that had a great reputation in the real world. At the entrance, the name of the hotel had been scratched out with red spray paint, replacing the name The Beach. 

From outside, it was easy to hear the thundering sound of bass music hitting the floor with every vibration. Shouts of joy and excitement could be heard, and as Aguni parked the car at the entrance, the Hatter stepped out of the car, a smile still on his lips. "It's a party here every day," he clarified to your incredulous look, curious as to where that sound was coming from. "Every moment we spend not playing is another moment of survival to enjoy life." 

He was now entering the hotel and the entrance was adorned with a huge red carpet, and trinkets that carefully decorated the room. He walked through the room, and the people you passed were all wearing bathing suits, not embarrassed to show their skin so easily. They greeted the Hatter with a nod, offering their best smile to their leader. Then he headed for the exit and once you passed the glass doors that opened to the outside, an apocalyptic scene was revealed before your eyes.

Dozens of naked or almost naked bodies were dancing together on the tempo of a frantic music, the alcohol was flowing and the smoke that escaped from some groups suspected the state in which they had to be. "And how better to enjoy life than to submit to the debaucheries and sins that the original world forbade us?"

There were definitely a lot of players, much more than you would have imagined. Each one of them was getting carried away by the sound of the raging music, some were mouthing at each other, some were exchanging glasses of alcohol and some were even passed out on the cushions by the pool. 

Niragi stopped beside you and the petty look in his eyes made your jaw tense. He was playing with the piercing of his tongue, amused by the debauchery that appeared before his eyes. You knew that look, you knew he was enjoying the show. It wasn't so much the bare legs of these girls moving their butts and breasts vulgarly that attracted him, but rather this space of chaos that opened the door to delinquency and crime.

"Welcome to The Beach," the Hatter enthused, his arms open to what he called a paradise.

The sound of the bass made your heart tremble with how loud the music was. It was strange that you hadn't heard that racket before, you were sure it was echoing throughout the entire city. Niragi watched with amusement as two men who had drunk too much started to get into a fight as one of them threw the first punch. He laughed, pointing at the one who fell to the ground at the power of the blow.

You weren't sure how to feel about it all. It was both completely crazy and absolutely amazing. On the one hand, you supported the idea that people could finally let go of their lives and barriers, that they could enjoy who they were without the social pressure of real life. On the other hand, it could mean the end of the world. Without faith and law, everything became dangerous. Every person you met, every action of anyone could cause an inevitable tsunami.

"I see you found The Beach," a voice came from behind you through the music, and you didn't have to turn around to recognize who it belonged to. Unconsciously, you closed your eyes for a second as the voice began again, "Or did The Beach find you?" 

The last few days had been so tumultuous, considering the hunt for food and the quest for information to try to understand this world, that you had forgotten (or ultimately didn't care) that this meeting with the Hatter was not your first encounter with people from The Beach.

"Chishiya," you opened your eyes and offered as sincere a smile as you could as the blond approached. You could feel Niragi's stature tense up at the very sight of the other man, but he said nothing to let it be known. "What a... pleasure to see you here."

A pleasure, far from it. But if it was necessary to play dumb so as not to start off on the wrong foot, then so be it. Hatter called out to himself, looking between the three of you as he tried to figure out what was going on. "Oh, you two know each other already?" 

"We've met, yes." Chishiya agreed, offering a smile to the Hatter who looked at him excitedly. You weren't sure how to react to him, you weren't sure yet if he was one of the bad guys or the good guys. Knowing each other in the real world didn't mean that much here. He had always had this mysterious air about him, and he enjoyed seeing the confusion on the faces of the people he talked to. It was a pet peeve of his, and with his amused look crossing yours, you wondered how he ended up here, too. 

"By the way," Niragi stepped in front of him, taking advantage of the way he towered over the blond with his height. He was trying to be imposing and intimidating in front of the other who didn't flinch under the threat. Chishiya looked at him curiously, and Niragi resumed, "you stole my card." 

"Stole it?" Chishiya wondered, his eyes round. 

"The eight of clubs, that was my card," Niragi growled, his jaw tense. 

You could have rolled your eyes at this little testosterone war that was slowly taking place between the two of them. There was a rivalry that was starting to take hold that had no place here. You knew that Chishiya had the nonchalant attitude that could easily get on anyone's nerves, but you thought that Niragi would be smarter than that. Apparently, he was falling for it too easily. 

"I think what you mean by that is that it was your card as much as mine. It was a team win, haven't you forgotten?" Chishiya retorted and God forbid he was right, because if Niragi didn't restrain himself, he would be able to throw his fists in his face. Niragi had little patience and arrogance was something that irritated him to no end. It was quite ironic, for someone as arrogant as himself.

Yes, if your only hope of getting out of this hellish world was to partner with the Hatter, then giving him your cards was the only way out. Chishiya had probably already given it to him, and the seven of diamonds that was still in the back pocket of your jeans seemed to burn your skin through the fabric. 

Even though what he was saying made sense, Niragi still considered it theft. He didn't like the way Chishiya looked at him with that condescending look on his face, as if he considered everyone around him as mere pawns in a world that only deserved his own survival.

"I guess not," Niragi mumbled after a few seconds, still holding his gaze in Chishiya's irises, which didn't flinch either. 

You weren't talking about stealing, but you thought it was much fairer to provide a card for each surviving player, than one card for all. This would avoid situations like this that would inevitably cause arguments about who owns the cards. But here, as Chishiya so aptly put it, it didn't matter. All the cards were going to the Hatter anyway. 

"Excuse me," you snuck between their two bodies in an attempt to pull them apart. You knew that it would take Niragi only three times as much to jump on Chishiya, it was as if he was just waiting for the other to weaken so he could get a good punch in the face. Both of them took a step back when your shoulders hit their torsos, and stopping right in front of the Hatter, you held out your card. "This is a seven of diamonds. Our other cards were stolen six days ago, so... we're starting over."

It was much smarter to lie than to admit that you had only played two games so far. You had to showcase your survival skills if you hoped to move up in this hierarchy. The Hatter didn't know anything about you yet, but for now, he would just have to take your word for it.  

"I hope you won't hold it against us, and that you'll give us a chance to prove our loyalty to you." You were far from agreeing with everything the Hatter had put in place, it was all what you would call dictatorship, no matter what he might say. 

"Ah, my dear friend, don't worry about the cards," he put an arm around your shoulders, as a slightly too invasive friend would do, and pulled you a little further away. Immediately, Niragi on your heels and his eyes piercing the Hatter's skull with his invisible laser beams coming out of his eyes for touching you as you walked down the stairs to the pool, leaving Chishiya where he stood. "We'll see about that tomorrow. For now, I want you to enjoy your evening in your new life as a resident of The Beach!"

He let go of your shoulders to slump down on a banquette near the pool, and immediately, two babes came to settle down beside him, planting languorous kisses in his neck. He was greeted by a cocktail glass containing a bluish liquid which he hastened to drink of only one sip. He slapped the buttocks of one of the girls, and the other lit a cigarette to put it in his mouth. 

If that wasn't a dictatorship, you wondered what was. Niragi, at your side, was laughing playfully, as if he thought that this place wasn't so bad after all. You couldn't conceive the idea that all these players were stupid enough to forget what world you were in, while Niragi probably supported the idea that forgetting was probably the only way to relax and let go of death's grip on you all.

"My room is on the top floor terrace. The execs have the rooms on the fourth floor, the rest belong to the players. I'll let you find the one that suits you best." The Hatter added between two kisses with the girl on his right, and you understood that was the end of the discussion. There was nothing more to add, nothing more to understand, nothing more to explain. 

Niragi pulled you by the wrist, and led you through the small crowd of players towards the interior of the hotel. You passed Chishiya who had stayed in the same place, giving you a curious look before heading to a place you didn't know. Back in the lobby, a few players were bickering as they made their way outside, something about the game they had probably just played earlier. 

You were surprised to see that the elevators were working as a girl in a bathing suit came out. She was wearing nothing but her blue floral bikini, her body naked. A lollipop was nestled in her mouth, which she sucked absent-mindedly as she played with the dreads in her hair. She walked past you, without giving you a single glance, and walked away to a door behind the reception. Niragi entered the elevator, still dragging you by the wrist. 

He stopped in front of the buttons on the shaft, thinking for a second before pressing number four. "The fourth floor is for executives only, baby." 

Niragi smiled. Yes, he knew that. He didn't need you to remind him. "We didn't come here to be underlings, princess. From now on, we're execs, you and me." Okay, that was a pretty radical decision. Still, the Hatter and his minions had to agree as well. If a hierarchy had been set up, it was surely to avoid coups like these. 

This did not surprise you from Niragi. After all, he had put behind him all those days when he followed orders like a common animal, and you knew that he would never again agree to submit to the ways of the shepherd.

The ding of the elevator rang out and the doors opened onto a long hallway. The light from one of the sconces flickered on the right, all the doors were closed, and Niragi stepped forward. It seemed that each occupied room was marked in a different way. 

To the right, the first door had a large X painted on the wood. Opposite, there was a poster of a naked girl hanging. Then there were three rooms with nothing at all, then there was another door with bullet holes that had pierced the wood. Next to it was a blank door, with nothing to differentiate it from the others except for the dozen or so dead empty beer bottles that littered the floor. 

A small pink bow hung on the door opposite, and next to it, several empty rooms again. As you made your way through the floor, you had this funny feeling that you couldn't ignore. It was something like a foreboding. Good or bad, it was still hard to tell. But something was waiting for you, you could feel it. 

You were trying to open a door, finally, when you were interrupted, your hand around the handle, "Hey, you there, what are you doing here? This floor is for executives only," a man rumbled from across the hall, and as he stepped through the dim light of the sconces, you could make out a gun in his hands, pointed at you. 

Despite everything that had happened in this world so far, this was the first time you had a gun pointed at you. It wasn't as scary as you thought it would be, or maybe it was just the fault of this country that seemed to have redefined all your fears and beliefs. 

The man was small, he had a bandage around his neck and he was holding a machine gun in his fingers that looked much heavier than he was. His voice was shaking, his fingers were shaking and even his hair seemed to be shaking. He had on a bathing suit that fell well over his hips, and a dirty t-shirt that stuck to his skin. 

Niragi slowly stepped forward, not afraid of the tip of the device sticking to his own torso. "That's a nice toy you have there," he muttered and the man stammered under his breath. You wondered who the idiot was who had appointed him executive. Or was he just providing security for the floor? To prevent people like Niragi or you from trespassing in a forbidden place like this one. "Can I borrow it?" 

"Ba-back off!" The man said, and he looked more like a teenager than a young adult with his frail body and pretty angelic face.

Niragi seemed to be amused, he had a small smile on his face that didn't bode well for you. "Come on what, I just want to hold it for a bit..."

"Stop it, I said back off!" The man shouted, taking a step back. He seemed much more impressed with Niragi whereas he was the one holding the weapon. "Go back to your rooms, immediately or... or I'll shoot!" 

Niragi laughed and if you were smarter than that, you would hold him back by dragging him further away, so you could go back downstairs. But you knew that Niragi would not forgive you if you did. You knew not to hold him back at times like this, as if holding him back or preventing him from doing what he wanted to do in front of someone would make him feel inferior. You couldn't do anything, you couldn't call him out, bring him to his senses. It was futile and unnecessary. 

"Please..." Niragi stepped forward and the man stepped back. You could only stand in your corner, your hand still on the handle as Niragi's menacing aura continued to intimidate the man. With one blow, Niragi's right hook slammed into the man's nose and he took several steps back. He didn't have time to point his weapon at Niragi again, who grabbed it and smashed it against his forehead. The man fell to the ground, and Niragi grabbed the machine gun and pointed it at his victim. 

"Please..." he echoed, his voice even more shaky, if that were possible. "I... I'll do anything you want, I won't tell anyone you were here, I -" 

Trrratata! 

But Niragi had pulled the trigger. The deafening sound of the machine gun echoed through the hallway, and the noise chilled your blood. You couldn't conceive the idea that Niragi had just pulled the trigger when in fact, the young man's lifeless body laid against the floor, the scarlet blood from his abdominal wounds running down the carpet. "What the fuck, Niragi, what have you done?" 

You couldn't take your eyes off the inert body that sat before you, and as Niragi stepped up beside you, taking your face in his hands, he whispered, "Look at me, princess, here, look at me!" His hands were icy despite the warmth within his walls, and finally taking your gaze off the dead man, you found Niragi's intense gaze looking for some reassurance to transfer into your eyes, "We will not be slaves to the Hatter, do you hear me? I'm going to do everything I can to get you and me out of here, and that means we're going to have to make sacrifices, you understand?" 

If you thought about it, you would remember that you had also sacrificed a man's life in the game of eight of clubs, but everything was different in the arena. In a game, you had to make choices and decisions to ensure your survival. But here, right now, it was a completely gratuitous act that was anything but necessary. 

"You fucking killed him, what were you thinking?" You were beginning to feel your heart racing, your throat dry as Niragi's hands applied light pressure to your cheeks to draw your attention to him. 

This was far from your first body, you had seen so many deaths in the hospital that you had found the strength to detach yourself from the feeling it could give you when you saw this. But here you had witnessed a cold-blooded murder, something that was undeserved, you didn't understand. "To fear or to be feared, which do you prefer?" It was neither an explanation nor an excuse. "I'll chomp all over them, right here, okay?"

You knew what he was thinking. If you were just a little more twisted than that, you would understand Niragi's way of thinking. That holding a gun established fear and respect, and that with it in his hands, no one would dare say anything to him, or do anything he didn't like. He was taking strength by force, and he was in a good position to know what it felt like, and how to do it. 

It wasn't a bad strategy, but you wished he had chosen another. 

Yes, the Borderland had no laws or rules. There was no punishment for murder here. There was no one to take justice where it should be applied. Here, there was only the law of the strongest, and the strongest today was Niragi, who carried his new machine gun with a proud look. He was going to take care of his weapon, he was going to pamper it and caress it as it deserved. Because with this, nothing and nobody could touch you. 

He knew that with this, he could ensure that you would always be safe. He would take great pleasure in keeping away anyone who might want to harm you. It was a protection, more than a real weapon. You had to see it that way. It wasn't so much the idea of killing that excited Niragi, no, don't get him wrong. 

It was the idea that here he could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. 

He would never say anything, never let on that you might get hurt in one of these fucking games. Or by one of those assholes who didn't like how you talked to them. Because he knew that all it would take to hurt him was to hurt you. 

No, he had to set his law here, no matter what the Hatter said. A new era had to start, the one of Niragi Suguru. 

And you, in all this, would always be safe. Always safe.

//////////////////////////////

Oooh lalalalala, I am SO sorry for the delay! My son had the flu all week, so he didn't go to daycare, and with work, I just didn't have time to write anything!

Anyway, we are in the thick of it! So, forget what I said about writing the story in one go, I'll have to make little time jumps otherwise it'll be endless

I've got a few more chapters to write that you're going to love, so I hope my little Niragi stans are still there, and that you still like what I'm making!

I hope to take less time for the next chapter, look forward to it, please!

Nageoire

[frazzledsoul]

Asking a few people their thoughts on this! Sticking only to the original series run, excluding AIYTL and excluding any visions you may have heard AmyShermanPalladino herself had for this scenario, what is your personal vision of what would have happened to Jess and Rory had Milo not left the show at the end of s3? Would they still have broken up at the end of season 3, then gotten back together later, or stayed together? Are they going to somehow date the entire time Rory is at Yale (it's incredibly unlikely he's going to go to Yale with her, so what are they going to show him doing in his early 20's pre-Truncheon?) Some arc where their relationship is more on and off and they date other people? Thoughts please.

So I'm not sure what Amy was thinking asking Milo to sign that big contract. I can't imagine that there ever would be a compelling reason for Jess to stick around Stars Hollow, and while she might be willing to invent a workplace and some co-workers for Truncheon for a single episode of the show, it's highly unlikely she's going to want to do that as a plot thread full time if those characters are never going to interact with anyone else on the main set. It's just not plausible.

However, putting all the logistical issues aside I don't think they would have stayed together. I think the class issues alone would probably have defeated them and Jess needed to go out and develop his own identity. He can't do that if he's just the guy on the fringes of her (more boring) story. He needed to figure out who he was on his own. And that entire story was probably too much for this show.

However, if ASP had kept Milo around I guess she wouldn't have had to inflict Jason (sorry Jason) and his scintillating insurance industry storylines on us as an excuse not to hook up Luke and Lorelai.

[lailoken]

I have a question about offerings of blood, I have a history of mental illness where that tends to be an area of triggers, and I was wondering if there are traditional substitutions or thoughts on that barrier that you might be willing to share. What makes blood important and how would one give something as important without well, the blood?

Hello there, and thank you for the question. It's a good one.

I'm going to start by addressing your question about why blood is important, based on my own personal paradigm. To put it as simply as possible, I was taught that the blood can be considered the living vehicle for the spirit. While the body itself can be thought of as the physical vessel that holds a soul, living blood can be thought of as the very medium by which that soul is tethered. I don't claim to know why this is, though I have my own theories about circulation and biological electromagnetic fields. What this means, however, is that by giving blood, we offer the literal energy that binds us all and keeps us alive to the magic in question. As such, if properly utilized, I believe blood can do a lot to anchor and manifest the will of a Caster.

Beyond this more foundational belief, though, blood is also important as an offering for other reasons, too. When offered to the spirits of the dead, it is a powerful way to tempt and draw them with remembrance of life. When offered to non-human spirirts, it can often be considered as something to feed upon. When offered to gods, it frequently serves to show determination and a willingness to suffer in exchange for one's endeavors.

All of this said, however, I don't believe blood magic should be undertaken lightly, and I really do understand that it may not always be a viable option. When it comes to your concerns about mental health, I think the only real option is to abstain from such practices until/if it becomes something you handle without risk to your wellbeing. At least that sort of issue is physically capable of being overcome, as compared to something like a dangerous bleeding disorder (which, for the record, I absolutely think overrides the need for blood offerings.)

As for offerings that could be given instead of blood, I would say that it depends on the circumstances. Certain rituals may very explicitly demand blood, and only blood, and I don't think virtually any substitution would suffice. If that is the case, and you truly aren't capable of giving blood, it may be worth reconsidering what else you could do, ritually speaking.

In the case of less strict situations, though, I have often found that a close second to an offering of Blood is an offering of Tears. Tears are sacred and intimately related to the myseteries of love, death, and ecstacy. Likewise, a sizable offering of Hair could serve as a suitable alternative in many situations, though the amount depends on the context. What's more, any beloved item that a practitioner does not wish to part with can make a very good offering, since it serves as another way to demonstrate a willingness to sacrifice. Finally, when in doubt, I highly suggest prayer, meditation, and earnest questioning; if you're thinking you need to give blood, but know you can not, then ask your spirits for guidance. Ask them what they want of you that you can give. Show them that you're willing to make it work however you can, while refusing to jeopardize yourself.

One last piece of advice on this matter has to do with the method of giving blood. Something I hate about modern media representations of blood magic is the way that characters employing it tend to inflict fairly serious injuries upon themselves using things like hunting knives. I would hope that most don't attempt to emulate this, but I know for a fact that some do, and it's DANGEROUS. It is very possible to hurt yourself far worse than expected if you're using a sharp instrument and aren't extraordinarily careful. What's more, it is extremely rare for a blood offering to require more than a few drops, so there isn't a need to fill a goblet or something. As a vastly superior alternative to using cutting instruments, I use a medical lance meant for diabetes testing. It was cheap and easy to get my hands on, it's sterile, it's consistent, and it doesn't risk my safety in any way. I can't suggest it enough as a way to draw blood.