#wew here it is

[felassan]

.

[the-admin-behind-the-slaughter]

leave it to me to always be doing sketches when i should be finishing school work and tending to asks. bah

i'll likely be slow with responses again, so have some roughly sketched concepts for a swapped afton x mia au because i like when women in stem get a lil unethical.

not fully fleshed out concepts, may be prior to change.

[illusivedelights]

(WALTZ OF FLOWERS PLAYING LOUDLY IN THE BG)

H o n e s t l y......it was for comedic purposes but he makes it work and ????? JOHN PRICE, THE MAN YOU ARE??? Also the roses are English roses because I said so :')

BONUS:

"Well don't go abandoning me at the altar now. Don'cha wanna see your 'blushing bride' on the honeymoon?"

[wewebaggit]

The Big Byler Theory

This might not be well structured but I will try not to be all over the place and keep it as short as possible. So here goes.

How it's gone so far

First and foremost, Mike's got to earn it. He has been a bit of a bitch and an asshole and has not yet learned the art of apologising. The show and Mike rest on Will's enthusiasm to forgive and forget to make it seem like all's fine and dandy. Mike hasn't apologised for his homophobic remark in season 3 and neither has he apologised for repeatedly ignoring Will. (season 4 apology was lame sowie) Mike has to learn to make amends (not just with Will) and take responsibility for his words. You can't just be the heart and then simultaneously be the asshole.

Will on the other hand needs to get to a point where he "doesn't hate himself" or at least makes major improvement in his self worth. His arc can't be about realising that he's deserving of Mike's love. But love in general.

Van Scene/Garage Scene aka Byler create a Scene

People talk about how Mike doesn't make him feel like a mistake at all and apply it to Mike making him feel like he's okay/better for being gay. NO. Mike's love and friendship makes him better for being different. Different in the way he's small and shy and easily intimidated but better cuz he feels like he can voice his opinions in front of Mike. Different in the way that his clothes are colourful, he draws and is artsy and sensitive and has been regularly bullied for those qualities even by his own father but better cuz Mike plasters his art everywhere. Different in the way that his songs are "stupid" or not Kenny Rogers but better cuz he can sing them around Mike anyway. Different in the way that he was possessed by a netherworldly entity and used as a spy but better cuz Mike made him their super spy. Different in how he was alone on the swings and Mike walked up to him and asked him to be his friend and it was the best thing he ever did. Different in the way he feels not everyone understands him but better cuz Mike does and would be gladly go crazy together with him. Different in how he is usually treatedlike a baby, like a freak but better cuz Mike doesn't treat him differently at all.

But that does not give Mike a pass. The 2020fication of the 80s or the post-homophobiafication of humanity in general has made people excuse homophobia just because it came from a gay guy. People need to realise that just because you suspect someone to be homophobic, you don't just cut them out of your life. Many do. Many don't. There's militant homophobia and then there's the hate the sin not the sinner homophobia. And everything in between. So Will regardless of what he thinks about Mike's homophobia is not just gonna dump his ass. As far as Will knows Mike's just straight. He does not have Tumblr perspective. Heck he has lesser than casual viewer perspective. So his gayness is still definitely something Mike doesn't make him feel better about. Cuz Mike doesn't even know for one. And Mike is just rubbing his relationship in his face even if it's not about being homophobic but just a bad friend. (In Will's POV)

And no. This is not to call Mike the devil's spawn. But to say that an express apology is fundamental to his own arc. Because to apologise to Will he must first forgive himself for wanting what he wants.

I resent the idea that Mike is aware of AND willing to explore his feelings for Will but ONLY stops himself because he loves El so so much and doesn't want to lose her. Makes no sense. She hasn't really been sending him any signals of wanting to chuck him out of her life.

Mike's arc is about conformism. And it is because he's someone who can successfully do it without being "clocked". He isn't scared to lose her. He is scared to lose his shield. He's scared to face his "difference" cuz if he doesn't have a girlfriend he is only a boy who doesn't really want girlfriends and honestly can't get girlfriends.

And again that's not a commentary on his frog face or inability to rizz up or whatever the kids are calling it these days. It is his canon inability to know anything about dating a girl. Something that is very instinctual. (Confusion over how to get back El vs just knowing to go after Will). He keeps looking up to Lucas who's by no means an expert since that's his first relationship too. But my boy Sinclair has his hetero instincts with him. Puberty slapped Mike hard and he is now not only aware that he's attracted to boys but also that he's not attracted to girls.

It's his defensiveness and self-hate that made him lash out at Will. Was he projecting? Yes. But was he really remorseful? No. Because he intended to say what he did. That's what people do when they're defensive. Cuz it was an entirely disproportionate response to "some stupid girl". Also a hetero would know bros before hoes. (ik shit) But he completely cuts off his bros? Ya. So so straight. As seen with Lucas not finding it hard to find a balance. (It's been like this all summer - Lucas Sinclair himself said it).

So what does it mean for Byler? (That is so horribly underdeveloped LMAO I can't even bt that's for a different day).

How it should go moving forward (I feel/hope/pray/manifest)

Well, the timing of it could be anything. But that painting is gonna be brought up. And it is going to be messy. I know people want Mike to be sad and not angry, but sad and angry is just so much better and makes sense. There is a fight. Because neither are ready to lay it all out in the open. You don't suddenly gain that confidence. I hope they're separated after. If it is because of avoidance, different team ups, or both. Doesn't matter. They both need time with their thoughts and the time being spent thinking about their own selves. This growth may be through convos with their loved ones and some other self reflective moments. I think that Mike's gonna get a coming out scene most probably with Karen. Will might get a scene like the one he already got in SBP with Jonathan but maybe with Joyce. (I hope she needs to make a comeback as a mother.) It could be a private moment or a Byers family moment. I don't want a party coming out. I want the boys to share this with the people that are closest to them and their fiercest supporters and rocks. Karen for Mike and Joyce n Jonatan for Will. Also, I think it's Mike who's gonna HAVE TO expressly say it while Will's could go either way. This is cuz of the differences in their circumstances - in/visible gayness.

How do they get together? Well believe it or not, a lot of unnecessary supernatural and sci-fi plot shit is crammed in (bullshit right?) and maybe they're now more okay being around each other cuz their deepest fears have been mostly assuaged. They don't feel alone with their truth and therefore, their place in the world does not rest on the reciprocity of their feelings. Imagine not HAVING to need each other but CHOOSING to. Cuz they just really really really want it. And it would make them happy. How they pursue each other is by not hiding. Nothing too brave I feel. Just being themselves. The vibes will carry. How THE getting together scene goes - I don't know. Surprise me, honestly. But for all the shit treatment their storyline has gotten so far I want s5 to fix it so well that WHEN it happens we all go crazy together! 💙💛

[hopefully-nightly-doodles]

New OC dropping? WRONG- That ring master OC is actually really old I just haven't drawn them in ages. Will I drop any lore on him? Maybe :P But he's not part of Signs™ they're from a different story entirely.

Anyway planning on redesigning Leo too since Lux has had their glow up. Z as well had a lil glow up but I havent posted it here or anywhere I think? :'Dc She's not gonna keep that fur tho cuz thats suppose to be Shadow (her familiar that can turn into her fur cape and claw gauntlets) But you're prolly wonderin why I gave her that fur in the first place tho n I have two reasons. 1st Is cuz I just wanted her to look more like a Lion. Im also planning on adding something to her face outside of the whiskers that show up when shes mad. Like something on her eyes to make it look more lion like? But Im not sure on that cuz its important in her story that shes somewhat "human passing" 2nd its cuz there's a greek myth linked to Leos and it involves Heracles killing a lion with impenetrable skin (Yes Leo's fur is the same)

[yotsubaclover]

on natsumugi, girls’ literature, and love

“Love is the key to life’s secrets. Love exists first, then there is life. If one takes away love, what is the meaning of life?” Kitamura Tokoku, “Disillusioned poets and women” (1892)

In the process of writing a paper arguing the validity of Enstars as yuri, I got to read a lot about Yoshiya Nobuko’s 1920 novel Two Virgins in the Attic. Chronicling the story of Akiko, a lonely young woman without purpose or direction, and her relationship with a rebellious girl named Tamaki, Two Virgins is incredibly notable not just for its queerness, but also for the way it participates in the love discourse of its time.

What does any of that have to do with Natsume or Tsumugi or Enstars as a whole? Girls’ lit has a lot of crossover and noticeable traces in Enstars, but that’s not a beast for today. What I want to explore is how Natsumugi’s journey during the War arc parallels Akiko and Tamaki’s story, and in turn, how Enstars echoes modern love discourse.

“Love can be a wonderful thing to experience.” That’s what Natsumugi makes me feel. They surrender themselves to it, letting themselves be scorched by flames, and from the ruins build themselves up again, as new people from the same material, within themselves a little bit of the other. They become intertwined. I want to try and break down that lofty feeling so I can share it with you.

i. what is ‘modern love discourse’?

Just like other abstract but incredibly proximate concepts, people have been trying to concretely define ‘love’ since time immemorial. Modern love discourse is one of those many attempts.

During the Meiji era, Japan opened up to the rest of the world after a long period of national isolation and began absorbing Western influence like crazy. One of the concepts they were eager to adapt was Christian love. This was in stark contrast to tradition Japanese conceptions of love, which were focused more on the physical and carnal. Spiritual in nature, that is, recontextualizing love as a pathway to not only physical pleasure but also spiritual/intellectual/internal fulfillment (self-realization, basically); and emphasizing purity, monogamy, and the institution of the family, Japan viewed this new idea as an asset in nation-building. Hence the heterosexual and nationalistic undertones in a lot of modern love discourse.

The opening quote to this essay is a good example of this. It’s from Kitamura Tokoku, a prominent writer during the Meiji era. (I encourage you to go back and give it another read or two before proceeding!) It’s a pretty concise and simple way to describe the majority outlook on love at the time: through experiencing love, we learn more about ourselves and find our place in the world. That place being... becoming a productive member of society by marrying and reproducing.

Love is generative. It is union, creation, and foundation. People live to pursue the goal of (heterosexual) love, in order to attain its rewards: wholeness of self, a purpose in the world. Without love, people are unable to live a full life.

Pretty rigid, isn’t it? It’s het and pretty focused on clear-cut romance. It assumes everyone wants to get married or have kids or has the capability to do either. Not too far from our society now, really; we still glorify (romantic—and heterosexual, I am thinking about comphet here) love as an important milestone in life. The dominant perception of love in modern Japan clearly privileged straight men. What about the women? And more pertinently, what about the queers?

There were certainly feminists who contributed to the discourse, but often they remained attached to the idea of marriage leading to fulfillment; in its engagement with queerness, one of the most prominent feminists of the time, Hiratsuka Raicho, actually disavowed same-sex relationships between women after getting married, despite previously having been in one herself and speaking fondly of it.

But queerness still sneakily found its way into the discourse through girls’ literature, due in no small part to the influence of lesbian writer of popular fiction, Yoshiya Nobuko.

ii. how does two virgins queer modern love discourse?

As a quick definition, girls’ literature or fiction here pertains to any written work meant for an audience of girls. While the term initially referred to novel-length narrative pieces, now it’s more or less an umbrella term. Modern girls’ literature was published in girls’ magazines, to be read by children and schoolgirls.

Written in an ornate, flowery prose that borrowed from classical Japanese literature, girls’ literature often told stories of unrequited love or passionate friendships between girls. These relationships were termed S-relationships or sister relationships; often, they manifested a sense of distance between the girls involved, usually through differences in age or status (think student/teacher). In fiction this distance took on other forms, such as unrequited feelings, noncommunication, and even emotional unavailability. 

As you might be thinking or already know, S-relationships seem pretty gay. If we want to be period-accurate (which means doing away with labels like gay or lesbian), then S-relationships are a form of same-sex relationships. They were not just a literary trope but an actual real-life phenomenon; both its practice and literary representation was allowed because it was seen as normative, a way to prepare young girls for heterosexual partnerships while protecting their purity because “there’s no way girls would have sex with each other! They’re pure schoolgirls!” In the cases girls did have sex, the relationship was seen as deviant and harmful. Same goes for the instances when two girls would attempt a lovers’ suicide because they couldn’t be together after graduation, or once they got married. 

A lot of girls’ fiction about S-relationships ended in tragedy as a result of those attitudes. Usually, one of the girls dies; sometimes one of them must leave, never to be seen again; other times there’s the responsibility of marriage and motherhood which is greater than the bond between two Best Friends And Something More (But Not Lovers, Not At All). It’s easy to see that and think “Oh no, the lesbians have been buried again!” and/or “Wow, so queerness here is a phase, huh.” In other words, girls’ lit seems like it bends to the will of the productive, heterosexual order of modern Japanese society.

But ‘a lot’ isn’t ‘all,’ and anyway, whether the tragedy of girls’ lit is positive or negative is an entirely different discussion from this one. Perhaps to your relief, Two Virgins in the Attic has a happy, liberatory ending for its queer couple: the titular virgins, Akiko and Tamaki.

Akiko is introduced as a girl who lacks a purpose in life. Struggling to pass in school and having distanced herself from her Christian faith, Akiko is evicted from her religious school’s dorm and forced to move to a new one. Her new room, the titular attic, is shaped unconventionally as a triangle, mirroring Akiko’s own feelings of detachment from people around her. She begins to see the attic as a safe space, the only place she can feel she truly belongs. This escapist fantasy is her sole happiness which allows her to bury her feelings of inadequacy and alienation, as well as distance herself from her social responsibilities as a young woman. However, beyond her beloved attic lies reality, which Akiko must eventually confront.

Despondent with her imminent loss of youth and lack of direction in life, Akiko meets Tamaki, her new roommate. A kindred rebellious spirit, but much more outspoken, Tamaki quite literally brings Akiko outside of her shell, taking her to meet new people, experiencing new things in the city, and teaching her about finding herself and her own path. Akiko develops romantic feelings toward Tamaki, which are returned, and the two form a bond that ultimately drives both girls out of the attic for good, and into the real world.

Throughout the novel, Yoshiya includes characters who have chosen to forsake same-sex love for heterosexual unions. One of these is the character Kinu, who appears towards the end of the novel. She is a beautiful older girl who was once involved with Tamaki. Unhappy and unfulfilled in marriage, and with nary a way out, she seeks out her old flame to ask if they could attempt a lover’s suicide. Kinu’s proposal poses not only a grave threat to Akiko and Tamaki’s relationship, but also represents the supposed destructive nature of same-sex unions; yet Yoshiya subverts this by clearly making Kinu’s misery in marriage the rationale for her extremity.

Heterosexual partnerships are painted as limiting and destructive for women, especially with regard to their own self-development and actualization. Conversely, through Akiko and Tamaki, same-sex love is seen as conducive for this development. 

While their bond brings many good things to Akiko, it also surfaces her insecurities when Kinu enters the picture. She grows incredibly jealous of Kinu, and these feelings drive a wedge between her and Tamaki; feeling abandoned and once again excluded from the world around her, Akiko lashes out, hitting friends who enter the attic and even destroying a doll that had been a gift from Kinu to Tamaki. This violence forces the dorm’s management to evict Akiko, giving her no choice but to enter the world she had so longed to hide from. While this may seem like a negative portrayal of same-sex love, similar to the strategy employed with Kinu, the narrative does not portray Akiko’s feelings for Tamaki as destructive. By framing it as jealousy and frustration at loneliness, same-sex love itself is not portrayed as the threat, but rather the inability to realize it. 

However, Tamaki comes to Akiko as she is packing, and proposes that they leave the dorm together. This pushes Akiko to realize what direction she wants to take in life—being with Tamaki—a realization made possible not only by Tamaki’s teaching, but their union as a whole. It is through their relationship that Akiko finally finds the purpose that had been evading her from the start.

In this way, same-sex love is portrayed as equally legitimate to heterosexual unions, if not more preferable altogether. Akiko and Tamaki’s relationship guides Akiko towards her own journey to selfhood and self-actualization; through her union with Tamaki, she is able to enter a state of ‘becoming.’

iii. what’s natsumugi got to do with any of this?

Two Virgins in the Attic, to me, is a story of love and how it reinvents the self. Our main girl Akiko starts out stressing over who she is and who she should be; she is caught at a crossroads of identity, unsure of what she herself wants, paralyzed as she clings to her youth and girlhood, which is ultimately unstable. It’s relative to age and societal perception; she can’t be a maiden forever, eventually she will become an old maid. The one thing she believes and wants herself to be, she doesn’t even have control over.

Akiko reminds me of Natsume. 

I think about this a lot, but you can read the war as Natsume’s bildungsroman. It’s his story of education—preconceptions of himself and the world around him are totally shattered, he is forced into an uncomfortable, unfamiliar position (that of powerlessness and a lack of control); these events force him to grow up, to leave the fantasies of his childhood with the new, more weathered outlook the experience has left him with. Of course, relationship troubles with your roommate are a different ball game from the psy-op that is the war, but Akiko and Natsume go through incredibly similar journeys. In the end, it’s through love (most strikingly for the Oddballs in Natsume’s case) that they realize what they truly want, and it’s also love which guides them to a new purpose. 

Tamaki is this mentor-character who teaches Akiko so much without us ever really getting into her head and understanding her views and side of the story, which makes it simultaneously extremely easy and difficult for me to put her as a parallel to Tsumugi.

Clearly, both of them are the catalysts for Natsume/Akiko’s change. Like, Natsume’s name gets brought up as an Eccentrics candidate because of Tsumugi. If not for that, maybe his first year would have been less traumatizing. Regardless of the reason behind Tsumugi bringing him up—did he recognize him from the get-go or no?—the fact remains that Tsumugi influenced the course of Natsume’s path during the war. Plus, even when he knew the Sakasaki Natsume of the rumor mills was his dear childhood friend Natsume-chan, he made no moves to remove him from the conflict. But on the flip side, Natsume is also the catalyst for Tsumugi’s change—extremely evident with “I really love that child,” and “You taught me pain... and everything else.”

Tsumugi’s struggles with minimizing his existence mirrors Akiko’s desperation to cling to her girlhood; in turn, we can say that Tsumugi’s comfort in diminishing himself is like Natsume’s stubborn belief in his own greatness and other childhood fantasies. These attitudes are both remnants of childhood that they refuse to let go. It is their comfort zone and what they know to be true and right in the world. If we keep with the coming-of-age theming, it’s their marker of immaturity. (I know it’s way more complicated for Tsumugi because of family and trauma and everything, but work with me!)

“Okay, sure, that makes enough sense. But the war had Natsumugi fighting against each other. Where’s the love in that? If anything, they only show any ‘love’ to the other in the aftermath,” you might be thinking.

Well, yeah! (Partly because during the war itself, they had different objects of affection; Eichi for Tsumugi, his nii-sans for Natsume. I’ve written something on Natsume’s love for the Oddballs already and there’s a lot to say for Eimugi, but I digress. I do want to point out that Natsume never really stopped caring about Tsumugi, even during the war. The intensity of his feelings of betrayal makes that pretty clear. On the flip side... there was definitely some tunnel vision and delusionality going on.)

It’s at the end when they do anything caring or ‘loving’ to the other. That’s because by then, they’re completely spent and alone. They’re spoils of war; lacking purpose, lacking direction, lacking motivation and ambition. By the end of the war, Tsumugi has never been more content with living a small and mediocre existence. Natsume’s first year of high school has been ruined, and both of them are alone like never before. They only have one another.

It’s a little funny that I talked all about growing up and maturing as a result of the war, to circle back to the idea that Natsume and Tsumugi are childhood friends. 

I think it’s interesting that they now have to learn how to navigate the pains of growing up together. Not because they were on opposing sides of the war, but because they’re reminders of who they used to be to each other; the ‘return to childhood’ between them is the beginning of a return to their dreams, what they wanted before they were invariably changed by that one academic year, and probably even before that. It’s a return to earnestness. 

When they were kids, they both just wanted to make people (their moms) happy. That was really it; they wanted to put smiles on their faces, wanted them to be proud of their kid. After the war, they don’t just return to that dream; they discover their own rationale for pursuing it, defined by who they are now, rather than forgetting either their innocence or jadedness. They rekindle a long-dimmed spark in each other.

It is through their connection that they are able to begin their journey towards a greater, more whole selfhood—towards a future as idols—on their own terms. It is through their union that they can reconstruct themselves.

(While I drew parallels between them and Akiko/Tamaki, who are romantically involved, I don’t even think that this reading of Natsumugi has to be romantic. Like an S-relationship, it’s definitely something more than simple friendship, but not necessarily romantic. It’s like a transcendental devotion, if that makes any sense.)

Rather than saying “love is generative/productive,” I think it’s more apt and economical to say that love is transformative. It’s exactly as the meme says: to be loved is to be changed. Let me offer a different image to ponder that thought, though. 

When I think of Natsumugi, I think of Prometheus. Because fire marks not an ending but a beginning; what can be destructive and violent is but an agent of change, a step forward into new frontiers, the key to doors of possibility that would otherwise never have occurred to someone. Fire creates agency in its ashes, free to scatter wherever it may please, the remnants untethered to the ground or to whatever it used to be. Its gift is a spit in the face of a god; now you've the tool to shape your fate. Now you can be anything or nothing at all.

What do we make of ash? Patience Worth gives quite a tender answer:

Who said that love was fire? I know that love is ash. It is the thing which remains When the fire is spent, The holy essence of experience.

There’s no better testament to that than Natsume and Tsumugi, together.

[dolmimi]

i just thought of f!whitney as a neurosurgeon at the hospital/asylum, and demon mimi living in tentacle plains. delinquent-turned-doctor and her demon gf. i am having a stroke rn.

[0dotexe]

Love when someone I knew irl from my past hits me up and I gotta remember all the parts of my life that I remember having to deal with at the time I last spoke with them and I gotta basically lorebomb in 10 minutes or less.

This isn't a bad thing, but if I had a nickel for every time this happen I'd have a good dollar's worth of nickels at this point.

[l33t-hax0r-tournament]

THE BRACKET IS HERE!

round 0 (yes, we are starting at 0 just like computers do) will start on march 2 at 12pm EST. the round will be spread out across 4 days to avoid a shadowban, and posts will be tagged as #round 0. the matchups were randomized, so sorry about that! matchups in text form are under the cut:

match 0: Ami Enan (Lupin III Part 5) vs. Harold Finch (Person of Interest)

match 1: Barbara Gordon (Batman) vs. Saburo Yamada (Hypnosis Mic)

match 2: Hackerman (Kung Fury) vs. Piconjo (Newgrounds)

match 3: Lain Iwakura (Serial Experiments Lain) vs. Dr. Alphys (Undertale)

match 4: Sollux Captor (Homestuck) vs. Lucyna Kushinada (Cyberpunk: Edgerunners)

match 5: Breanna Casey (Leverage: Redemption) vs. Saeyoung "707" Choi (Mystic Messenger)

match 6: Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost In The Shell (1995)) vs. Bentley Wiseturtle (Sly Cooper)

match 7: Kururu (Keroro Gunsou) vs. Mei Hatsume (Boku no Hero Academia)

match 8: Nomi Marks (Sense8) vs. Tulip Olsen (Infinity Train)

match 9: Tae Joon "Crypto" Park (Apex Legends) vs. Penny (Pokémon)

match 10: Tux the Penguin (GNU/Linux) vs. Hieronymous "The" Hacker (Cyberchase)

match 11: Elliot Alderson (Mr. Robot) vs. Koushiro "Izzy" Izumi (Digimon Adventure)

match 12: Vanessa A. (Five Night's at Freddy's: Security Breach) vs. Chihiro Fujisaki (Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc)

match 13: Donatello Hamato (Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) vs. Aloe Cookie (Cookie Run: OvenBreak)

match 14: Monika (Doki Doki Literature Club!) vs. Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivruski IV (Cowboy Bebop)

match 15: Spock (Star Trek) vs. Roxy Lalonde (Homestuck)

match 16: Rita (The Penumbra Podcast) vs. Futaba Sakura (Persona 5)

match 17: Entrapta (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power) vs. Mickey Smith (Doctor Who)

match 18: Idia Shroud (Twisted Wonderland) vs. Alter Ego (Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc)

match 19: Urushihara Hanzo (The Devil is a Part-Timer!) vs. Alec Hardison (Leverage)

match 20: Root (Person of Interest) vs. Tali'Zorah nar Rayya (Mass Effect)

match 21: Katie "Pidge" Holt (Voltron: Legendary Defender) vs. Penelope Garcia (Criminal Minds)

match 22: Carla Dosa (The Hex) vs. Nicole the Holo-Lynx (Sonic the Hedgehog)

match 23: Dendy (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes) vs. Toshiko "Tosh" Sato (Torchwood)

match 24: Yasuho Hirose (JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: JoJolion) vs. Ezekiel Jones (The Librarians)

match 25: Ritsuko Akagi (Neon Genesis Evangelion) vs. Felicity Smoak (Arrow)

match 26: Robert "Bob" Johansson (We Are Legion (We Are Bob)) vs. Maya Ibuki (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

match 27: Neo (The Matrix) vs. Trinity (The Matrix)

match 28: James T. Kirk (Star Trek) vs. Player Bouchard (Carmen Sandiego (2019))

match 29: Shiang Sun (Shin Megami Tensei: Liberation Dx2) vs. Raimu "Rhyme" Bito (The World Ends With You)

match 30: Susie (Kirby) vs. Miles "Tails" Prower (Sonic the Hedgehog)

match 31: Mikado Ryuugamine (Durarara!!) vs. Fuuka Yamagishi (Persona 3)

[buggknife]

🐤

[thewhizzyhead]

hi bros and bitches i have an announcement - i think i'm nonbinary

[akuarchives]

Chapter 93

[wewebaggit]

do you think eddie and will would've gotten along if they'd met?

I see no situation where they meet before the end of the world. So like Eddie doesn't die stupidly. And Will comes back from Cali. And then it's just go go go. Like I know people have made personality compatibility type takes and I fall more on the no side of this than yes in those typa situations, but also I feel that point is moot cuz if you want to join the DnD club that's all there is. Eddie is non-negotiable and I don't think Will would necessarily have to be compatible with him if he doesn't have to hang out with him later.

The real wildcard here for me is not even Eddie, it's Will. (Like yes now me too entering personality territory but not compatibility territory). But seeing Will in S4 all by his lonesome even if he was better in terms of his sexuality (which come to think of it he really wasn't but that's for another post) I actually feel now that Will made no progress in Cali at all. He allowed himself to marinate in his sadness. Here he was at a school where no one knew him and no one bullied him and maybe girls even liked him and yet he has no friends. He barely interacts (doesn't) with Max and El was literally forced into his life. I don't think he does well with new people. Something we ascribe to Mike for many reasons but I find myself disagreeing as I type.

So I feel if in a fantastical situation he didn't go to Cali, Hopper too didn't die so El's still in the cabin or hidden and maybe there's some party time DnD wise at school or Hopper dies El moves in with Joyce and he still has Mike coming over doing his Mileven shit. Max is not talking to them which makes zero difference to Will let's be honest. Lucas has basketball. So it's Dustin n him. Dustin is the charismatic one of the two. So I see Will tagging along playing the game and getting the fuck out. All of this yapping to say. Eddie and Will is a fanfiction concept but to try and put it in the show's universe faithful to it somewhat (imo is always implied) I feel like it's an entirely inconsequential dynamic. Where there's no great bond nor there's any disapproval. Will sassing Eddie? Ya won't happen. Will making Eddie change the date for basketball? Nope. He may not play the game, but dude's gonna be as useless as Dustin and Mike at convincing Eddie to change the date.

In any case the ones great at making multigenerational friends are Dustin and Erica. So ya Will and Eddie are nothing. Lucas and Eddie level camaraderie. No one's doing it like Dustin. Sorry.

[diiegosaur]

# DIIEGOSAUR : what  can  you  tell  me  about  racing ? you  know  who  else  races  horses ? peasants  who  think  they’re  above  everyone  else  because  they  have  a  minor  talent . PROFESSIONALS  HAVE  STANDARDS ——— be  polite , be  efficient . . . & have  a  plan  to  kill  everyone  you  meet .

independent DIEGO BRANDO ask/rp blog. canon divergent au.

follows from @blue-rphub.

[littlenim]

new succession has me feelin insane

[scoruspio]

[Review for Bones & all. CW: Spoilers for the entire book and movie]

I watched the movie for B&A at the cinema when it came out. Took myself to see it. I didn’t actually like it at first, me and my quick judging. So, a part of me wishes I could go back in time to watch it on the big screen, now knowing I do like it, lending to a more fulfilling experience. I imagined Maren and Lee as the actors the whole time too, despite it saying in the book that Lee has blond hair (?)

Which brings me around again to that other point - the book was significantly different in a lot of ways. I thought it maintained a similar vibe, though. The mother brought Maren up and was a non-eater, while the father was the eater in the mental hospital. Sully didn’t just invite Maren into an old woman’s home who happened to be dying. Maren met that woman at the grocery store, was invited home by, and fed by the woman, before said woman was discovered by a recently slept Maren, dead from nature causes -and it goes on. The timeline and relationships between character’s were also different -enough that there was somewhat of an unpredictability to the read.

I first attempted reading this book in either 2022 or 2023. I don’t think I thought it was bad - or not that I recall. In fact, my mind decided that my will to read actual published books was just not present at the time, and is why I gave up on it. But as I began reading it over a few days ago (I also questioned if I should start it from where I left off, and if I would have trouble starting from the beginning again. My worries were unfounded, even though I remembered some details from my first read) , and fresh off the PASOAM bandwagon, the writing style on B&A wasn’t exactly cutting it for me. It felt a bit bland. YA-y in a bad way, and had some language sprinkled in that I found a bit cringe-worthy. I thought B&A might honestly become a DNF. But then, along the way, I got into it more. I also settled into the word choices a little more. It might sound like there were more than there were based on my complaint. There really wasn’t. I essentially settled more into appreciating the book for what it was.

I can be a bit too distracted when reading for my liking, and will sometimes settle into checking how many pages are left in the chapter, checking how many chapters are left, and how many pages are left in the book as a whole. But it was my aim to immerse myself into reading B&A, and it did work better for me than it sometimes does. The way this was written was better than I gave it credit for. There was strangely a cosy aspect to it. I appreciated the sense of almost adventure, freedom, self discovery, living on the outskirts. One of my favourite things for a good majority was the way Lee spoke to Maren, more than how he was in the film. Though I would say there is at least enough of a resemblance that I can say “they’re the same character.” Though, if I mentally squeezed my brain enough, It’s possible I could reach a different conclusion on that on my own. Although, I’m sure there are people out there who find the two distinctly different, and even find Timothee’s portray offensive. At one point in the read, I would have said - and with some amusement at that - that my biggest disappointment of the book was that book-Lee was not bisexual. And I was. He literally needs to be bisexual. What do you meann he snuck off with some unfortunate, uptight girl? But, that definitely wasn’t the biggest let down.

Somewhere along the way, I realised Maren and Lee weren’t going to get together like they did in the movie. They kiss in the movie - there’s an insinuation that they have sex in the movie. Now, I’m not certain book Maren is capable of any of that, at least not yet. Then, somewhere along the way, I realised I liked that there was a slow-burn between them. I’m not saying I prefer one or the other when comparing the two. It suited what their book counterparts were. There was no talk of Lee killing his real father - he did in the movie, right? Instead, he spoke primly of the past relationship between him and his ex girlfriend Rachel, and on how Lee killing his mother’s boyfriend lead to their breakup, and her psyche-ward admittance. I thought it was quite heartfelt. He seemed to really care about her. There were still lingering feelings too. It garnered a response of secondhand jealously and admiration in the romanticism over it. You could argue movie-Lee confessing about his father is an indication of a closer connection and trust for Maren. But, I think the emotionality of book-Lee in that moment really connected with me somehow, bumping my rating of the book up to a surprising 4. Some part of me can also appreciate Lee’s “there are some things I won’t tell you no matter how many times you ask” -boundary setting. It’d admirable. A 4 star rated book though? Almost seems unheard of with current me. I do believe it will happen, I’m just not expecting it, is all. A 3 and the highest.

I didn’t know if Lee and Maren were ever gonna get together either, or if they would just dance around it the entire time.

But Lee and Rachel were together, Maren’s parents were confirmed to have had sex. (is reminded of LIS: Rachel Amber. Past flames being called Rachel) Surely Lee and Maren could be intimate with each other, as they couldn’t with others. The B&A movie basically confirmed they can be. There’s even a line where Sully says that eater on eater consumption is wrong, taboo. But no such thing is mentioned in the book. My assumption still stood though throughout.

Shortly after landing on my 4 star rating, Lee and Maren part ways. The emotion and memory of it is already blurry. But, I feel it was much more organic than how it happened in the movie. Maren’s father’s psych-ward attendant seemed like a pedophile? Might have been. Then, Maren winds up back at Sully’s cabin, where she discovers that book-Sully is her grandfather -and an evil cunt. And here is where I’m beginning to feel disappointed. There’s a sense of convoluting. There were layers added. Talk on Maren’s past kills, which are NOT really mentioned in the movie. The majority of which are boys. There could be implications to that, to some. Is there a physical element for her with her draw to boys? Or, do they just happen to fall into her orbit? Are female eaters different to male eaters? I was basically fine with it, maybe in a bit of a glazing over sort of way. I didn’t think about it too much. But I enjoyed the depth of it up until the Sully/Maren relation reveal. It’s not that I hated that they were blood relatives. There was just a sense of congestion. Perhaps my disappointed is also related to how the reveal was orchestrated. Lee’s different to Maren’s other boys. Maren will learn to control herself, pace it out. These are the subtle thoughts I had. Although, you gotta love that fucking finger mutilating under the coffee table from movie-Maren. There’s also implicit bisexual subtext in it. She collected all those books from her meals (victims). There was an ongoing implication of remorse in those actions, in her draw to religion, in some of her opposing opinions to Lee’s. But there’s also a steady steam of disconnect from her actions, that are also present in the movie. I like it, I like it. I liked the depth to her character compared to the movie, and as I said, Lee’s personality. But still, the movie maintained -from earlier on- more of a distinct level of romance between the leads. More of a clear vision for the “outsiders against the world” kind of trope.

Then comes the college portion. And it’s not the worst, but I don’t like how it’s branched together in the book. The movie implies that they attempt to settle down and even make some sort of attempt to start as normal a life together as they could have for themselves. Some juvenile version of adulthood. It doesn’t draw on with this subplot with another girl-victim. Sully comes and does what Sully does. But it’s not a beautiful, romantic, grotesquery - a harrowing joint struggle like it is in the movie, leading to Lee wanting Maron to eat him -begging her to- making his death meaningful. Bringing the story to a culmination of an utterly bloody, off kilter romantic end - that he was a part of her now in a way that no normal person could comprehend. No. Instead, Lee lives. Lee fucking lives. He “offscreen” eats Sully -he eats Sully alone by what almost seems like magic. But it ties into how he also killed that guy in the Walmart bathroom. Shows that he’s more seasoned. And that’s good. That’s nice. There’s a satisfaction in it. Lee just appears to Maren in the bathroom. I don’t even fully believe he’s real. There’s a surreal quality. She had an underlying sense of confidence that he would overpower Sully, when I didn’t. There’s a hazy feeling of unreality. Then Lee and Maren settle down on the bed. They drink from Sully’s flask. It’s sort of weird. Maren gets tired, and that’s weird too. At least to me, how it was written.

Lee seems to finally be showing clear signs of reciprocal romantic feelings. It’s finally paying off. I’m really enjoying it. Even thinking about it now, the feelings of elation are popping back up. *Rolls onto my face* At the cut off point -before the next scene- Lee mentions something about being sorry for acting icy -which was previously mentioned. But in my mind, that sort of behaviour only stood out to me the morning after they discussed Rachel. But in retrospect, and on further inspection, I feel he was talking about his underlying avoidance on getting romantically involved with Maren. Maren says he should stop touching her, and he only has his hand on her shoulder, for the most part. Which again, in retrospect, implies caution. Respectful, knowing caution even. And her telling him to stop, I thought: “what in the ever loving back and forth confusion.” I didn’t have a right to jump to that. That hadn’t been a thing throughout the read. It all was handled quite nicely. It never even connected in my mind that it would be the same sort of situation with him for her as it was with all the others. Then, on the cut-off before the next scene Maren’s stomach rumbled. That was the last line. I’m befuddled. That was an odd choice of phrasing. That caught me off guard. What could that possibly mean? Then. Lee is gone. Leading to a second immediate follow up bout of confusion. Did Lee go somewhere? .. Like he always does? …Even though he finally broke the cycle of not sleeping in the same bed. Of leaving before she woke. It was a gentlemanly thing to do. And I think it was PURPOSEFULLY supposed to have these hidden, dual meanings, as with other actions/conversations in the book. You’re meant to be just as aware of their animalistic sides as their human ones.

LEE IS FUCKING DEAD LIKE SOME FUCKING KINN, APOCALYPTIC SHIT. And it’s so, SO much worse than it is in the film. Because it’s not romantic, it’s not astronomical. Sure, he let her. There was even a passing -now thought of as pathetic- attempt at suicidal thoughts that Lee expressed. And I think a part of why I see some of these “passing” moments as small, is because I gloss over to retain a certain “perfect” mental image of someone. And it’s so engrained in me, that I don’t always notice, and it warps reality. So, now I question it a bit … But NO, I wanna say that it was just a passing, teeny, directional-warning sign close as fuck to Lee’s death, as well as the equally teeny mention of Lee allowing the carnage. And a little tumblr user could come about and say “Lee was worthy. Maren didn’t eat the psyche-ward bish cause he didn’t deserve it. In contrast, Lee was deserving. Because although this cannibalistic life is destructive and self-destructive, it shows that Lee felt close to Maren - that they were close, and thus allowed each other access of the others body in this almost ultimate form of intimacy and joining.

…and it ends there, right? NO!! NO IT FUCKING DOESN’T. Lee goes almost completely fucking unmentioned for the remainder of the last chapter. Meanwhile, Maren plays fucking black widow in the library with a FUCKING rando. Gets a FUCKING dorm of her own and sits in on FUCKING collage lectures even though she’s FUCKING 16. Maren’s proven disconnect to her fellow victims, in juxtaposition to her nice girl aspects, which act as like a layer of icing, a nice little bow - the optimist in you WANTING to believe that this side of her can flourish. That both sides can work in tandem- that to the twisted individual, she can be seen as likeable, redeemable. *Whispers* but whatever one might say. Whether I’m not looking at it from the right angle, or deep enough -I can’t help but read it as that in the end .. the animalistic nature of her is unpredictable, uncontrollable, to a point. That this tryst with Lee was but a passing moment, a thing of the past. That it wasn’t special.

You know, Kayla didn’t die in the book. Kayla was Lee’s reason for living, he said. Imagine there was some indication that I didn’t notice or wasn’t shown when looking through Sully’s stuff, that indicated he had killed Kayla, and that’s why he allowed Maren to eat him? That might be more interesting and now that I think about it, more justifiable. And since the story is told from Maren’s perspective, it would make sense that he didn’t tell her about it. But I don’t know if it really aligns with his behaviour leading up to his death. Just a thought.

As far as I’m concerned, the audiobook might as well end on some 90’s-early 2000’s rock music. Cause, what in the ever loving Jennifer’s body - but not in a complimentary way. So yeah hahaha, wild ride… 1/5.