#wet ham

[alexplantewpg]

i made some stickers

[vermwerm]

sillay gijinkas

[overchromatic]

shhh...

[existencebringsonlypain]

reblog for sample size, please, or don't

[wrathevil]

number 5! @simcardiac-arrested

theyre so funny i squish them like bugs

[everafall]

canon-compliant gi. sumeru trio x deity!f!reader.

this idea derived from another idea i had about the sumeru trio. reader’s a spirit of sorts, like the aranara and jinn and perhaps hermanubis, who was an important ally of the god-kings until the cataclysm. throughout five centuries, she has been trying to find ways to free nahida, therefore developing deep hatred for the sages.

reader’s naturally friends with candace as she’s deshret’s descendant, helping her out with the protection of aaru village. to an extent, she became friends with dehya, who encouraged the traveler duo, cyno, and alhaitham to gain her trust so she can warm up to them. although adamant, she was able to get along with the traveler duo just fine, but cyno and alhaitham left a bad first impression on her. (cyno has a divine spirit and reader knew who it was, and alhaitham’s being a smartass.)

alright, enough backstory. that’s gonna be condensed throughout the hcs lol. she and the sumeru trio developed romantic (and carnal) feelings for each other.

dehya: sleeps around when she’s stressed from work; favorite part is using the strap, which she plans to use on reader.

cyno: his divine spirit pops out; grows feral; claws and fangs are ON during sex, which might be the most painful shit reader’s gonna endure.

alhaitham: claims not to be interested in deities but is interested in reader; there’s a lot more to him than meets the eye which reader finds… uh, attractive?

[edandstede]

i’d love an indulgent little montage of stede bathing for the first time since he gets back to the revenge, especially since such a pivotal emotional moment took place there. idk just the symbolism of him taking up that same space that ed did, covered in his robe, spilling his heart. peeling off his dirty clothes, nothing separating him from the trust ed put in him that night, baring himself the way ed did and washing away the last however-long’s worth of longing to be home. allowing himself this tiny little sliver of respite, the steam surrounding him, submerging his head under the water but surfacing again, really feeling the ache of proper piracy and the bigger ache of remembering ed’s head against his hand

[plantanarchy]

Hydrangeas are almost all gone <3 bye, you horrible bastards I love you.

[snowshinobi]

controversial hamlet opinion several hundred years late but guys let's face it: hamlet adores the sound of his own voice. so much he breaks the fourth wall to ramble. he fully commits to the visual presentation of grief. head to toe black. his own mother, wife of the dead man, asks hamlet to tone it down. he refuses. hamlet pretends to go insane so he can investigate his dad's suspected murder out in the open. he sets up a play WITHIN HIS OWN PLAY to give his shitty uncle the heebie-jeebies.

guys. hamlet is having fun. oh he's in agony, unequivocally: he grows numb to his friends as he realizes he cannot trust anyone. he loses his grip on his identity, his truth -- maybe he is truly mad after all, no act. he falls prey to the same murderous betrayal he set out to solve in the first place. his own story eats him.

but GUYS. hamlet had fun. despite everything.

[yourfavoritehouseplant]

Disco is dead

[woodwool]

i love the norwegian ham post so much bc why are there norwegians getting defensive about it in the notes. that is Exactly what my mom packed me for lunch my entire childhood except i didnt even get an egg

[baekuras]

so there are super textured paintings right? and some ppl who take it to the next step and basically make literal 3d shapes on the painting coming out right?

could you technically make an opal out of paint? so that the insides are all colourful and the outside is a solid or like marble mix of a different colour-smth cool but unassuming

could you cut into that or would it crumble? i need to know or try but i do not have anything beyond watercolour which is the least textury paint for smth like this

[courtofparrots]

Ham took a shower today so I feel obligated to show off the wet chicken

[wildhannimal]

I will never absolve my local french-style cafe for advertising a scrumptious jambon buerre but then failing to add the BUERRE

[aercnaut]

l.in-m.anuel has the general vibes of someone who may or may not be lightly possessed or at least partially haunted at all times and tbh i think that's hot

[dot-m-dot]

>going to an unforgettable luncheon

>ask the host if they have hamburgers or steamed hams

>he doesn't understand

>pull out illustrated diagram explaining New York expressions

>he laughs and says “it’s a good meal sir”

>they're obviously grilled